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the-boring-little-pub · 2 years

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Dani x Jamie Fic Recs

Fics are in alphabetical order by author and are not listed in a way that is intended to imply preference. This list will constantly be updated. Most recently added fics will also come at the top of the list.

Recently Added

(02/14/2022) put your love (to the test) / I’ve Got a Problem, Poppins / Five Alarm Fire / (let’s be) Alone Together / The Haunted

Adhallya

I've had the time of my life (and I owe it all to you) (M) – The Dirty Dancing AU.

Anonymous authors

she’s a rebel and she’ll never ever be any good (E) – She’d known Jamie for five years, and she hadn’t tried to seduce or corrupt her once; Not even so much as a wink or a smug grin in her direction. Not that it bothered her. No, she wasn’t the least bit bothered by the idea of not being good or desirable enough for Jamie Taylor.

awriterofthings

Love Light (M) – Dani decides she and Rebecca need flowers in their apartment but she ends up leaving The Leafling with flowers and a crush on the florist.

Love Light: A Series of One-Shots (M) – A series of one-shots based off Love Light. Won't be in any type of chronological order.

Room 224 (M) – Dani hasn't seen her ex-girlfriend in 8 years so when Jamie ends up a coma patient at the hospital she works at, Dani does all she can to take care of her, and if old feelings resurface-- she'll just have to deal with that when the time comes.

backtoblack101

You're Just a Prisoner (And You're Trying to Break Free) (M) – A single weekend, a few months after graduation, has Dani realising (with a lot of help from her friends) that maybe the life she'd spent the past four years building for herself wasn't the life she wanted at all.

You're My Sunday Candy (M) – Jamie was a morning person. Always had been, always would be. Dani was not a morning person. Never had been, never would be. Surprisingly this isn't a problem, because Jamie's favourite thing to do in the morning was wake Dani up.

blake0tyler

and everything is icy and blue (and you would be there too) (M) – There is no way on God’s green earth that Dani would ever voluntarily decide to dress up as a sexy Christmas elf if she wasn’t desperately in need of some cash. And maybe the fact that the girl running the flower shop across from the Christmas market can’t seem to look away.

bk_moonflower02

put your love (to the test) (M) – Set post-Bly, Jamie decides to get a degree. Said degree requires her to study. While studying for an upcoming exam, Dani offers to help. And to be fair, she did try to help.

carrot_garden

guard your shins (like guard your heart) (M) – Dani transfers to the team that Jamie plays for in a World Cup year and Jamie hates the whole situation.

cheryltonis

17 cherry tree lane (M) – Jamie and Dani have been friends since they were eleven years old and their bond has withstood the test of time. but now, just as they’re entering their thirties, Dani’s life has taken a turn for the worse, and their friendship will be tested in a way that neither of them ever expected.

that summer seemed to last forever (E) – The summer camp counselors AU.

ClomWrites

Angels and Coffee (E) – Jamie has a problem, in the shape of an angel who can't make tea to save her life (the Coffee Shop AU).

Drowning (E) – Their first time.

Full (E) – A Motel. Some rain. A second chance.

Hungry (E) – Dani wakes up hungry.

In Sickness and In Health (M) – Jamie does not like being sick.

Inevitable (M) – Sometimes the thing you need the most is standing right next to you. Sometimes it's inevitable. High School AU.

The Sundress (E) – It's a good dress. It's driving Jamie bonkers.

colour_outside_the_lines

Can’t Buy Me Love (E) – The lesbian Pretty Woman AU.

Life in the City (M) – Jamie is a player who never thought she'd want a serious relationship again, until suddenly she does.

Memories of Us (E) – Jamie Taylor had been through a lot of rough things in her life, and at thirty, when it felt like the universe had stopped using her as its personal punching bag, that worst happened. She received a call informing her that her fiancée had been involved in an accident (The Vow AU).

Secret Love Song (M) – When Dani signs up for the foreign exchange program along with her long-term boyfriend Eddie, there had been many things she had never expected that she would be forced to have a long-distance relationship or that she would fall in love with the daughter of the host family she was staying with. (Modern day/College AU).

Stuck With You (E) – Jamie doesn't like her new roommate Dani, she's too perfect, a bit too pretty, and Jamie is far too attracted to her. For months Jamie had been able to put space between them avoiding Dani at all cost, but when a global pandemic hits and Jamie had nowhere left to run she has to face her feelings head-on. (Lockdown roommates AU).

creaturefromspace

mistakes like this (T) – Jamie, Dani, and a game of Spin the Bottle.

strawberry swing (E) – It's Dani's first time living in a single room and Jamie's her RA. After a noise complaint causes a brief interaction between the two, Dani can't get Jamie out of her head.

the sweetest taboo (E) – When Dani receives a letter in the mail from her mom telling her she’ll be coming to visit Bly Manor - along with Dani’s ex-fiancé and his mother - she realizes the only way to get them to all move on is to convince them that she already has. With Jamie pretending to be her girlfriend (and quite convincingly, she might add), what could possibly go wrong?

to wish impossible things (T) – After landing herself in detention for the first time, Dani has a conversation with Jamie that changes her life.

dark_moonflower

Five Alarm Fire (E) – Dani Clayton is a 911 Operator. Jamie Taylor is a Firefighter.

(let’s be) Alone Together (E) – Set near the start of the pandemic, Jamie meets Dani whilst walking her dog. They find that not even the current state of the world can keep them apart. Some people are just meant to be together.

The Haunted (E) – Jamie is a member of The Haunted Motorcycle Club, who returns home after a tragedy only to uncover a string of secrets, lies and betrayal. Not to mention Dani Clayton.

FanAddicted2000

Hell is other people, but not you (T) – Jamie and Dani are going with their life, not really noticing they aren't living it to the fullest until their path crossed. Jamie is raising her baby brother by herself while balancing school and her job; Dani is stuck in expectations that keep her from being her true self.

gooverly

You committed, I'm your crime (push my button, anytime) (E) – Public defender Dani Clayton gets assigned a new case: Jamie Taylor.

letusbebrave

was a willow (and it bent right to your wind) (M) – Everything comes back to life at Bly when the new au pair arrives. Spring arises to meet her, her garden growing mad for that first week. Saturday is when Dani is properly brought into her life. Singlemom!AU.

littlesolo

Caught Between Duty and Desire (M) – The bodyguard AU staring MI6 Agent Jamie Taylor and the future Queen of England, Danielle Clayton (written by littlesolo and thewildtype).

Finally Seen (M) – Dani is Mikey Taylor's teacher and that's how she meets Jamie. She and Jamie grow closer when Dani's old life follows her to Bly. Can they weather the aftermath?

lorelaislatte

shower your affection (let it rain on me) (M) – Seven Minutes in Heaven/High School AU.

the undone and the divine (E) – Hospital AU. Dr. Taylor and Dr. Clayton.

LostGeekMonkeyGirl

do you want some company? (E) – The trucker/friends with benefits au.

n0t_my_name

Bloom Town (E) – It's the summer of 1852 and Dani O'Mara is traveling west to join her husband Edmund in the goldmine town he left her behind in Iowa to establish two years prior. The long journey, she's expecting. The desert heat, she's expecting. The nervous anticipation at the idea of a fresh start out west, she's expecting. She’s decidedly not, however, expecting a gang of outlaws to kidnap her from the train by order of their notorious leader, JT London.

Fair Trade (M) – One life for another.

Incredible Seabirds of the Kerguelen Islands (M) – The perfect storm.

The Land of The Living (M) – Every end a new beginning.

The Longest Night (M) – Sometimes you just want company.

novel_concept26

(above) a boring little pub (M) – In which that dreadfully boring little pub date actually takes place.

at the end of fairytales (where do we go) (M) – For Jamie Taylor, music and magic have always been a mixed bag. For Dani Clayton, they’ve always been just out of reach. Together, touring with rock music’s hottest new band, they’ll navigate love, possession, and an ancient hunger too stubborn to go quietly.

been so good at wasting time (thank god for july) (M) – An unhappily-married Dani living in the suburbs hires a lawn care service run by a woman who strikes her speechless.

blink (M) – Dani and Jamie make it to Flora's wedding.

Control Series Part 1: having so much fun all alone (i wanna let somebody know) (E) – There are things Dani needs, some days, to remind herself who is in the driver's seat of her life. Jamie is more than happy to help, even on the tail end of a pounding headache.

Part 2: she tells me worship (in the bedroom) (E)

Part 3: (how lovely i feel) not to have to pretend (E)

Part 4: (your gift to me is just to be) bracing for the winds i always summon (E)

(could be dreadfully) boring (T) – Boring gets a bad rap, really. Boring can be the best thing in the world.

eligible (G) – With Bly's newest bakery about to open, Dani finds herself roped into a fundraising auction in which she is the prize.

heading into the dark (and we’ve got to hang on to each other) (M) – In which Dani finds little lights to lead her through the dark.

(late night) bargains (G) – In which Jamie wakes before Dani that night.

learning a lot (about being alive) (M) – So much of the story is the same. Dani. The kids. The lake. So much of the story is exactly the same--only, this time, there is no gardener working at Bly Manor.

(my love can be) the killing kind (M) – Peter Quint is the easiest mark in the world, a job without complication. All Jamie has to do is pull the trigger. If only the woman from O'Mara would stop getting in her way.

no fear (don't you turn like orpheus, just stay here) (T) – After the lake, Jamie strives to offer Dani some measure of comfort.

on the hunt (for who i've not yet become) (M) – Au in which Jamie is taken in by the O'Mara family, and Dani grows up wedged between two best friends with dark hair, learning slowly how to fall in love.

postcards (T) – In which Dani Clayton simply can’t sit still.

reciprocation (E) – Five times Dani fell asleep without reciprocating, and one time Jamie did.

something to hang on to (T) – When Jamie buys a camera, she isn’t really thinking about it. It isn't a plan. Isn't for any particular reason.

souvenirs you never lose (M) – Five scars Dani found on Jamie’s body (and one she left behind on her heart).

the beast you've made of me (M) – Dani Clayton has spent half an ageless century carrying the splintered soul of an ancient vampire. Half an ageless century waking, walking, drinking, forgotten by every mortal she meets--until a pub chosen by chance, and a woman who insists on remembering.

the shape of it (T) – They expect the Lady to come, one day. They expect the Lady to take Dani, in the end. They did not expect it to go like this.

there's an art (to life's distractions) (M) – Jamie's only looking to get a particularly detailed tattoo; she doesn't actually mean to fall for the artist.

unexpected (E) – Five things Dani realizes she likes in bed (and one thing Jamie realizes she likes about being with Dani).

universal cue cards (T) – An alternate telling in which the seamstress responsible for Dani's wedding dress is Jamie.

walking with the lady (M) – In which Viola wakes and has an abundance of opinions to share, whether Dani wants them or not.

with one eye open (all i see is you) (E) – In the aftermath of breaking her engagement, Dani Clayton decides if one's going to do a thing, it might as well be done right.

Wedding bells series - Part 1: the key to any problem (M) – Dani Clayton is not looking forward to attending her mother's wedding--especially given the girlfriend she has brought along for the trip is not actually dating her at all.

Part 2: an ocean away (E) – Jamie is off to London for a weekend celebrating Owen's upcoming wedding; Dani, back home, finds certain methods to combat the loneliness of staying behind.

who am i (that i should get to hold you) (T) – You find your soulmate, they say, in your dreams. Dani Clayton has been dreaming of curly dark hair, of strong hands, of a crooked smile all her life. If she tilts her head--if she squints just a little--she thinks she can make it fit.

(you may be) my final match (E) – When Dani Clayton proposes a friends-with-benefits scenario with the local florist, she is only looking to surprise herself, learn how to sleep with women, and have a little fun. She is decidedly not trying to fall in love.

obsetress

and she taught me a lesson alright (E) – As long as it's mattered to Jamie, it's always been her and Flora. always, that is, until Dani Clayton, Flora's year four teacher.

Part 2 - suddenly i took the chance (E) – A collection of oneshots.

kiss me deadly (E) – In the midst of threats from a former employee, Henry Wingrave relocates his niece and nephew, and their au pair, Dani Clayton, from London to his family's country home in Bly. the only problem? Jamie Taylor, the private security specialist Henry's contracted to stay with them while they're there.

Raginage

Friends....with benefits? (E) – Jamie finds herself flirting with the pizza delivery girl, Dani. Jamie finds out that Dani moved to England with a broken heart and while she's not looking to get caught up in anything serious, she is looking for someone she can have fun with, no strings attached. Turns out, Jamie and Dani feel the exact same way, until one of them doesn't.

My Favourite Faded Fantasy (E) – Jamie and Dani have been happily married for six years. However, unexpected complications prove to be too much to handle and divorce seems like it's the only logical thing to do. But seeing as Jamie's mom's wedding is right around the corner, Jamie and Dani agree to pretend they're still happy and in love for the ten days they're scheduled to visit with her.

Private Dancer (E) – Jamie becomes lovestruck with the new dancer at the strip club she lives above.

The Lost Temple of Aten (E) – The Mummy AU. Eddie is visiting Dani in Egypt. He steals a treasure map off that leads to the Amulet of Protection, which is believed to be buried in the Temple of Aten. After speaking with some of the locals, they find out that a treasure hunter named Jamie Taylor might know about the map. They end up tracking her down in an attempt to hire her to help guide them to the temple.

Youniverse Part 1 – I was made for loving you (E) – Based off the TV show "You”. After being turned down by her best friend Jamie, Dani meets a beautiful girl. Their relationship quickly blossoms and it becomes obvious to Dani that Viola is the perfect escape to get over her feelings for Jamie. Jamie slowly regrets pushing Dani away as she discovers that Viola seems too good to be true. Something just isn't quite right with her.

Part 2 – The times Dani was a total bottom (E) – A collection of one shots.

randomcactaceae

Between chlorine and troubled waters (T) – As the new swimming training seasons starts, a new member joins the team. Danielle Clayton, an art student who was a swimming superstar back in her high school in America. And Jamie can't stand her. She's just too perfect.

Shananigans402

Obstacles (E) – Dani suffers an existential crisis that has her fleeing everything she has ever known in search of freedom and maybe even love. Dani never expected that she'd wind up teaching at a secondary school in England. She also never expected to have her life turned on its head after a chance meeting with a mysterious and confident young woman who, unfortunately, just so happens to be a student at her school.

Part 2 - To All of You (M) – Obstacles follow-up oneshot collection.

sigmalied

Afterglow (M) – Thirteen years of a loving relationship, built, explored, and cherished.

Part 2 - The Evergreen Letters (M) – Afterglow Universe: how Jamie realises she’s in love.

Inflorescence (E) – Dani stares into the calla lilies, admiring the contrast of ivory spathes suddenly blushing deep violet around the spadices delicately protruding from their cores. They’re a bashful sight; shy, secret, and vulnerable. Yet completely hopeful - even from the protective embrace of their gentle petal sheaths - for a chance to proliferate. Affection and yearning coil like a mass of vines through Dani’s chest as she thinks, in awe, about how incapable they are of hurting anyone.

Skairipa_100

I’ve Got a Problem, Poppins. (M) – Jamie Taylor is a MI5 agent who never lets anyone get too close. Love is weakness, she believes. When her team is assigned as the protective detail for Wingrave and his family, Agent Taylor realizes she has a problem: she’s falling for Dani Clayton, the American au pair she has been assigned to protect. When the mission goes terribly wrong, Jamie finds herself trapped with Dani in a foreign country and separated from her team.

StoryMachine

Can you help me look after Mikey? (T) – Jamie needs to go on a grocery run and asks Dani to help her look after Mikey. She may have teased her a bit, may have flirted with her a bit. It's not like Dani doesn't flirt back though, so it's all harmless, right?

The Archery Contest (M) – Dani's father is forcing her to choose a husband. So she gets Jamie to dress up as a man and enter an archery tournament her father hosts to win her hand in marriage. Then, the two friends can live out the rest of their days without ever having to marry, only with Jamie having to throw on trousers every once in a while for an appearance.

takemebacktothenightwemet

36 steps to heaven (M) – There's a theory that you can fall in love with someone in 36 questions. Dani's psychology teacher puts the study to the test, by pairing her with none other than Jamie Taylor. The girl she hasn't been friends with for years.

Just another high school romance (M) – The abandoned school bathroom had been left to rot over summer. Jamie found herself hiding there from AP English that she certainly wasn’t in the mood for, when the bathroom door swung open. Dani’s perfect boyfriend and perfect planned out life isn't what she wants anymore, and she needs someone to help her realise exactly what she wants. Enter Jamie Taylor.

therestisjustconfetti

For the Love of Football (E) – When Dani finds out that one of the top football clubs in England wants her to come and play for them in the upcoming season, she jumps at the chance to cross the pond and play abroad. She's quickly thrust into a whole new world of the game and discovers that the captain of her club's top London rival might just be the biggest distraction she's ever come up against as a player.

We've Got a Problem (E) – A love like theirs is as rare as a moonflower. And they're grateful that the flower shop has a private back room. Flower shop scene.

thewildtype

Give It A Go (E) – The College AU staring soccer star Jamie and Dani "I still haven't declared a major" Clayton.

Imagine Me & You (& Our Friend Owen) (G) – Jamie has a less than positive outlook on marriage, but when Owen convinces her to attend an engagement party as his plus one, she meets a charming stranger that just might change her mind. (For the_boring_little_pub.)

Yes, Miss Clayton (E) – There's something about Dani's teacher voice that riles Jamie up.

totheflame

the sweetest little sting (M) – Jamie works at a dive bar in New York, Dani wanders in one night on accident, a slow burn ensues.

#dani x jamie #damie #the haunting of bly manor #dani clayton #jamie taylor #ficrec #fanfic #damie fic

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comfyswitcherblanketfort · 3 years

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IUI - The Way I Love You

bear with me here folks

I know the Idiots are usually soft af. but my lovely spouse/fiance/soon-to-be-fiance and beta @dani-dandelino hit me with an idea and I added a dash handful of angst bc i couldn’t help it

Warnings: feelings of inadequacy, fear of breakup (no actual breakup I promise), miscommunication, drunk af Geralt, past shitty relationships, happy ending tho I promise, there’s tears but they’re happy I swear.

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Geralt only ever got sloppy drunk when Jaskier was the DD. It wasn’t necessarily that he didn’t trust anyone else, it was that he didn’t trust his drunk boyfriend not to goad him into something stupid.

The last time they’d both gotten fucked up outside of their apartment they woke up with three traffic cones and a “Speed Hump” sign in their living room. When they asked Triss what happened she sent them a video of them giggling as they tried to fit the sign into her trunk.

After hanging the sign in their apartment, they decided it may be best to take turns.

This particular instance, they’d dropped Triss and Yen off and were on their way home, Geralt’s head lolling against the window as he fought to stay awake.

“I’m not carrying your perky ass upstairs,” Jaskier laughed, snapping his fingers near Geralt’s ear.

Geralt grumbled but sat up straight and leaned into Jaskier’s outstretched hand, “Radio.”

Affectionately rolling his eyes, Jaskier pulled his hand away and flipped on the radio. Geralt immediately gasped and started singing along off key and slurred. The first time Jaskier heard Geralt scream along to Taylor Swift he’d been shocked, if extremely endeared.

“BUT I MISS SCREAMIN’ AND FIGHTIN AND KISSIN IN THE RAIN! IT’S TWO AM AND I’M CURSIN’ YOUR NAME! SO IN LOVE THAT WE ACTED INSANE, AND THAT’S THE WAY I LOVED YOUUUUUUUUU!”

Jaskier turned the volume down to a reasonable level when Geralt cranked it so loud his ears might start ringing. He rolled his eyes when Geralt started singing it to him, taking the shortcut home and trying to ignore the little pit forming in his stomach.

When the song ended Geralt turned the radio down and picked up his hand not gripping the steering wheel, “Jask?”

“Mhm?”

Even in the car, Geralt glanced around conspiratorially before whispering, “I have a secret.”

Fear flared in Jaskier’s chest but he took a deep, calming breath, reminding himself who he was talking to. His boyfriend thought secrets were fun. Mostly because Geralt’s version of a secret was keeping what he made for dinner a surprise until Jaskier got home. He’d even felt guilty not telling Jaskier he was seeing a therapist when they’d started dating. For all his gruff exterior and suspicion, Geralt really was an open book with those he loved and trusted. Jaskier had a very different idea of what secrets in a relationship meant.

“What’s that, love?”

Geralt giggled as he traced the edges of a magnolia on the back of Jaskier’s wrist, “That is the way I love you.”

Luckily for Jaskier’s car, they were rolling up to a stop sign. He had time to loose his breath for a moment and fight back the initial feeling of shame and anger with himself before he pulled his hand away and gripped the steering wheel as he punched the gas.

Through gritted teeth, he said the gentlest thing he could think of, “We don’t kiss in the rain.”

Geralt frowned, almost pouted at him, “I still love you.”

A part of Jaskier wanted to scream at Geralt, another part wanted to pull over and make him walk home, thankfully the loudest part reminded him the idiot was just drunk. He didn’t know what he was saying and he thought he was being sweet. There was also a good possibility he would cry himself to sleep in the passenger seat if Jaskier yelled at him and last time he tried to carry Geralt to bed his back hurt for a week.

“I love you too,” Jaskier sighed as he pulled into their parking spot.

He didn’t sleep well that night. Not because his sweaty, smelly, and fidgety boyfriend clung to him in his sleep, but because he couldn’t stop thinking about the ride home.

Jaskier had lived in relationships like that for most of his adult life. Hell, even in his teens. They were nothing but all consuming passion with no connection to support it and left both parties jaded and lost. When he left his mentor he’d sat in Yen’s chair for hours and hours, until his arm had gone numb, and the only thing he could think was ‘never again’.

And now Geralt thought he was being cute. The ridiculously meticulous and serious man was only ever sappy when he got drunk and now instead of reveling in it like he’d like, Jaskier was staring at the clock on his nightstand calculating how exhausted he’d be in the morning as the minutes ticked by.

Turns out, he was at least in the land of the living by the time Geralt shuffled into the kitchen with his hands in his hair and a pained expression.

“Feel like shit.”

Jaskier hummed in agreement as he sipped his morning tea and shifted in his seat to see better out the window.

After popping a few anti-inflammatories and nibbling on a cracker before giving up on food, Geralt lumbered up behind Jaskier and draped his arms over his shoulders, “What’s wrong?”

“S’nothing. I’m just being… touchy.”

Geralt pressed a light kiss over the hellebore tattoo on Jaskier’s neck, “I doubt it.”

Tears threatened to spill from his eyes as Jaskier laid his hand over Geralt’s arm across his chest, “I don’t want to lose this.”

“Why…? What makes you think you would?” Geralt was a little slower on the draw hungover, but he knelt next to Jaskier’s chair and rested a hand on his knee as he waited for a response. He only ever looked so worried when Roach had an abscess and it broke Jaskier’s heart. He didn’t want to say it and ruin everything.

After a deep breath in, he mumbled out his answer, “Do you really love me like that song?”

“What song?” Geralt breathed, his thumb brushing back and forth over Jaskier’s knee.

“The uh, Way I Loved You one.”

Geralt searched his face for a beat, the crease between his eyebrows only deepening, “Of course I do.”

“Fuck,” Jaskier breathed, biting his lip to keep it from wobbling as he forced all the air from his lungs in the hopes it would do something to stop the tears from falling. When it was clear he would lose the battle he leaned forward with his elbows on the table, hiding his face in his hands.

“You… don’t want me to?” Geralt sounded close to tears himself, but he didn’t take his hand off Jaskier’s thigh.

“No- yes! No?” Jaskier sniffed and wiped at his face but didn’t lean back to look at Geralt, “I- Geralt I can’t just fill a hollow relationship with lust. We ha- I thought we had more? But if you want the- the fights and the hate fucking- I don’t- Geralt I don’t want that. Not with anyone but not with you. Ne-”

“Hey, hey,” Geralt tugged at Jaskier’s arm, gathering him to his chest when the brunette melted into sobs, “I don’t want that. That’s not what I meant. I’m sorry, love. I’m so sorry I let you think that.” He cradled Jaskier’s head to his shoulder, pressing kisses into his hair between softly spoken apologies and reassurances. They stayed there until Jaskier’s tea went cold and his sobs were closer to little gasps.

Eventually, Jaskier lifted his head and met Geralt’s eyes, “H-how do you love me?”

Geralt licked his lips, his voice barely above a whisper, “Not- It’s not hollow.”

Jaskier squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his forehead to Geralt’s, “Please?”

One of Geralt’s hands came up to cup Jaskier’s cheek as he took a deep breath, “I’ve never loved anyone like I love you… I never wanted to be romantic with anyone until you. You… You make me feel… safe. I’m never bored of you or numb or sick of you. This is the first relationship I’ve had where I bother to fight, Jask. I love you so much it makes me do things I never thought to do and I’m glad and I never want to change anything about us. Never.”

A shiver ran down Jaskier’s spine as relief flooded his whole body. His throat ached from crying and his shoulders were sore from holding all that tension in a way they hadn’t for years, but he’d never felt so good. Geralt loved him. Him. Not some tumultuous relationship or the sex or the drama of it all. Someone finally loved him for him.

It hadn’t really hit Jaskier till then. They’d said ‘I love you’, sure, but he hadn’t really believed Geralt, just like he’d stopped believing the string of selfish lovers before him.

“Thank Mellitelle,” Jaskier laughed, just on this side of hysterical as he tightened his grip around Geralt’s shoulders, “I fucking love how boring we are. And you. Fuck I really really do love you.”

“Even when I smell like my regulars?” Geralt teased, intentionally huffing a little extra and dosing Jaskier in his horrendous hangover morning breath.

Jaskier wrinkled his nose but smiled and kissed him anyway, “Of course.”

“Mhh,” Geralt pulled away for a moment, brushing his thumb over Jaskier’s crows feet in a silent request for him to open his eyes, “Can we go back to bed?”

“The crying does it for you, huh?” Jaskier chuckled, his voice was still weak but his laugh was genuine.

“I’m so dizzy, Jask,” squeezing his eyes shut and shaking his head ever so slightly, Geralt plopped back onto his heels. If Jaskier hadn’t witnessed just how much he drank he’d say he was lying, but Jaskier was truly surprised he’d even climbed out of bed this morning.

“Mkay, up. Back to bed then.”

They settled under the blankets and tangled themselves back together. Geralt hummed, closing his eyes and squeezing Jaskier a little tighter.

New, happier tears threatened at the corners of his eyes but he pushed them down, opting to trace the corner of Geralt’s buttercup tattoo peeking out of his shirt, “I love you.”

Geralt took a deep breath in before he sighed out a rumbling, “I know.”

“No, Geralt. Really,” Jaskier laid his hand over the yellow and green ink, “I’ve said these words more times than I can count but I don’t think I ever really understood them until you.”

“Jaski-”

“I love you,” Jaskier’s interruption was far smaller and far more fragile than he had intended. His words just continued to spill out, “You’re steady and calm and I’ve never had that. I don’t know what it’s supposed to be like and I’m constantly scared I’m gonna fuck it up…”

Comforting fingers ran through his hair as Geralt murmured his reply, “Me too,” Jaskier just squeezed his shoulder in a bit of solidarity and a bit of selfish comfort, “But I think we’re doing alright…”

“Why’s that?”

“Well,” Geralt started, shifting so he was practically engulfing Jaskier, “we both still love each other, and...” his boyfriend pinched him when he trailed off, pretending to fall asleep in a way that always mad Jaskier giggle, “Ow- and you use the hooks by the front door.”

“I do, don’t I?” Jaskier sniffled, “And you used your words.”

“I’d use all the words for you.”

“All of them?”

Geralt really was drifting away this time, his words coming slowly as his arms relaxed and Jaskier felt their full weight over him, “Not well, but I would...”

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raziyekroos · 2 years

Note

YESSS!! [im also persian and a tsc fan]

I’m sooooo happy rn:)) i have truly found my people🥹🥹 this is certainly a nice start to the new year! Speaking of….

🎊🥳Norouzet mobarak🎉✨i hope you have a wonderful year!!

Okayyyy i got a bunch of questions for you because, if you cant tell, im really really happy and excited to have found you:

Who is ur favourite tsc character? [JULIAN FUCKING BLACKTHORN, MAGNUS FUCKING BANE!!]

Whats ur favourite series? [TDA]

Who is ur favourite downworlder? (Theres a right answer here) [Magnus Lightwood-Bans]

Who is ur favourite shadowhunter? [Izzy]

How long have you been in the fandom? [ive been a fan for 2 yrs but actually joined the fandom about a year ago]

Do you write fics? [nope, i did write taylor swift fics a LONG time ago]

Favourite tsc ship? [magnus and alec… OBVIOUSLY]

Least favourite tsc ship? [alastair carstairs and the guy i refuse to name 🧑‍🦰]

FIC RECSSSS? (Preferably malec but idrc) [nope i dont have any fic reca at the moment, true love never dies is rlly nice but Dani is famous so i think you’ve already heard of it]

Whats your timezone? (Is it weird to ask people that?? Idk. Don’t answer if youre not comfortable) [mine is EDST/EST]

Do you speak farsi or any other persian language? [yea im fluent in farsi]

Is your ask box always open? [i don’t post so doesnt really matter]

*okay so i realized it’s not fair if i just ask the questions without you getting to know me so i decided to answer them too)

OMG I HAD NO IDEA!!! HELLO?!! SO HAPPY TO MEET YOU 🤭🤭❤️

Ok first of all, what can I call you?! (You can call me Razi/Raziye (راضیه) whichever you prefer 🌝🌝)

NOWRUZ MOBARAK TO YOU TOO!! DID YOU CELEBRATE?! 🤭

OKKKK let's answer the questions 🙈 (also, thank you for answering them yourself too it's nice to get to know new people and their passions!!)

My favorite character? Welllll i have a hard time choosing between Magnus and Alec ASFGHJHJJJJJ I really love them both :') so let's say both of them! ^^ (I LOVE JULIAN TOO?!?! HE'S ACTUALLY MY FAVORITE AFTER MAGNUS AND ALEC!! and if I wanted to marry a tsc guy it would be him 👀🤣 cause well Alec is gay and I can't think of Alec and Magnus with any other person so yup!! Julian 😎😎 what about you? 🤭)

Favorite series is TBC/TEC for obvious reasons 🌝🌝 but if I wanna choose between the main series it's TDA and TLH cause they were both chaotic af and I love it 😂😂

Favorite downworlder of course THE MAGNIFICENT BANE! DUH 😎

favorite shadowhunter, well it's Alexander Lightwood for me of course 🌝🌝 (but if I wanna choose the best Shadowhunters, as in shadowhunting I'll choose Emma!!)

SAME!! I've read tsc since 2019_2020 but I've joined the fandom about a year and a half ago!!

I don't write fics nope :') I don't think I'm good at it ASSDFGGJJJJ and I've never actually tried, but I'm trying fan art (kinda) out now but it's still not ready 😂😂🙈 when it was I'll show it to you^^ (ohhh Taylor swift! Nice ^^ one of my school friends was OBSESSED with her so I know a lot about her 🤭🤭 and @magnus-the-maqnificent here really loves her too so 🌝🌝)

Favorite ship is Malec of course 😎 (malec is just different for me but after them Jemma, thomastair and Jordelia!!)

Least favorite ship for me is yes Alastair and the guy-who-should-not-be-named 🌚🌚, James and Grace, and tmi Clace kinda?! I really like them in other series but they were not my favorite in tmi 🙁)

Ohhhhh fic recs 😎😍 I love fic recs (both giving them and receiving 🌝) and I actually just read malec so they're all Malec anyways addfgghhjjjj

Spell my name in your blood (I really love this one 🥺😭❤️), the get along fortress, you like me too much, sharp are the arrows of a broken heart by @magnus-the-maqnificent

Bright Lights Small Town, Love is not a victory march, 42 North 71 West, Stars Aligned, alea iacta est by @lecrit

LBAF, I Will Fix You, Put a ring on it, Veni Vidi Amavi by @khaleesiofalicante (and yes I've read tlnd 😍 I really love it *sobs*)

The Chronicles of Bromance, Even when the time changes, by @igonecrazy

And A Prince and A Blue Jay by Sandylee007

Aasddffg i don't really know how this time zone work 💀 but I searched it and it's what google said 🌝🌝

And yes I do! I live in Iran so it's my native language and I speak it everyday 🤭 I can't really speak any other Persian language no :( but I understand لری completely cause I hear it often too 🤭 (soooo does that meab you do not live in Iran? Am I right?👀)

Also, my ask box is always open yes 😍 I'll be happy to get to know you more!!

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boasamishipper · 2 years

Note

all the EVEN numbers for the writing ask! Aha!

2. Anything that you’d like to write but feel like you’re unable to?

i'd love to be able to write smut, but i'm not very good at it - it always feels like pulling teeth. i'd also love to sit down and finish my robisanya time loop fic, but it is Very Complicated and i have to be in a very specific once in a blue moon mindframe before adding onto it.

4. Do you have any OCs? Do you have a story for them?

i sure do! my ocs for my forever in progress original novel are chloe bolden and devi chakrabarti, two foster sisters who audition for a role in their favorite television show, elementary endangerment - only to find out that the show is Very Much Real and Very Much Dangerous. my latest fanfic ocs are as follows:

The West Hambos (Luka Visnjic, Natan Roubeni, Gunnar Magnusson, Rob McClare, Billy Schofield, Will Taylor, Mario Bonucci) - In The Light You Will Find The Road series (Ted Lasso, Nate-centric)

Grace Obisanya Adeyemi, Ben Adeyemi, Richmond 'Richie' Adeyemi, Julia Rojas, Javi Rojas, Gabi Rojas, Jandro Rojas, Olivia Alexander, Nina Reynolds-Cabrera, John Oluransi, Luisa Ortega - You've Got Bantr series (Ted Lasso, Sam/Dani-centric)

Jess, Bill and Taylor Kazansky - Ice's family who were co-invented by @academicgangster and appear / are mentioned in many of my top gun fanfics

Kelly Serrano, Laura Evans, and David Bennett - Billy Tyson's ex-wives and ex-boyfriend who are mentioned in my and @lilalbatross's Austin Alone series (9-1-1 Lone Star, Billy/Owen-centric)

6. What’s your ratio for rating your works?

idk how that works but out of the 71 stories i have on ao3, the majority are either Teen And Up Audiences or General Audiences.

8. How slow is a slow burn?

my slow burns can be Pretty Damn Slow, as my mutuals can no doubt attest. from a scale of 1 to 10, 1 being 'they fuck/kiss/get together right away' and 10 being 'they don't even learn each other's names until 200k in', i'm probably around a 4, maybe a 5?

10. Top three favourite fic tropes.

time loops, 'there was only one bed' + all offshoots, and A Metric Fuckload of Mutual Pining.

12. If you write in more than one language, what’s the difference?

i only write in english, so n/a,

14. Write and share the first sentence of a new fic. Just that.

Dani is going to propose. He swears.

16. Are one-shots really underrated?

i mean, i've never heard anyone say so, but there's definitely something nice about keeping a story short and to the point.

18. First, second, or third person?

third person. sometimes second person - i don't mind reading it but i don't like writing it - and No Thank You to first person.

20. Do you work on a single project or many at the same time? How does that work for you?

i don't know how to write if i'm not working on at least three projects at once lmao. it's kind of nice actually because if i hit writer's block on one project and am feeling shitty about myself / my writing, i can just hop onto a new project and vibe there for a while. instant serotonin. also instant stress because more often than not, i'll be midway through one project, get the idea for another, shift gears to solely that project for a few months, then get an idea for another.... You See Where This Is Going. rip to all my abandoned wips. on hiatus but never forgotten.

22. What is it about watching the same two idiots falling in love over and over again?

That's The Good Kush. the writing/reading/watching equivalent of comfort food and comfy sweatpants.

24. Thoughts on flashbacks/flashforwards.

@toseehowthestoryends's fic Freeze On The Stones is the be-all and end-all when it comes to masterfully employing flashbacks in fic, imho. i've employed flashbacks from time to time in my works, but very sparingly - i prefer to work within the present.

26. What would you describe as OOC?

....i guess anything a character does that is out of the ordinary?? it really depends on who i'm writing. iceman kazansky will do and say things that sam obisanya never would.

28. Any writing advice that works for you and you feel like sharing?

outline outline outline!! cannot tell you how much easier my writing has gone for me since i started working with outlines. outlines don't really make me stick to projects any better - that's on my ADD - but they do make the actual writing process much smoother.

30. Describe a fic that almost happened, but then it didn’t.

god, so many. most recent one that comes to mind is a benji/ilsa fic i was considering writing for Some Time, but it never got off the ground for me. (magic conch voice) Maybe Someday.

32. Do you have a word/expression that you always use in your writing?

Literally So Many. i always throw around the same metaphors and expressions, and my fics almost always have Terrible Puns Within and song lyrics for titles. i still crack up thinking about the time i thought i was So Clever writing @academicgangster a fic for an exchange without telling her, and she figured out i was the anon author literally from the very first line because of a pun i wrote. i am nothing if not predictable lmao.

34. Do you write to improve? Or is that not a concern for you?

i write because i like to. improvement happens along the way. like, my writing today is much better than my writing in 2019, but i wasn't out there writing - say - my top gun / mcu crossover fix it fic because i thought it'd make me a better writer or anything; i just liked the idea and went for it.

36. How do you come up with fic titles? What’s the one you’re most proud of?

9 times out of 10, my fic titles are song lyrics, lines from poems, or Very Bad Puns. my most favorite fic title i ever came up with is You Had Me At Aloe, for my top gun 2 specfic where fritz accidentally tells ice he looks like a succulent (and other things occur as well).

38. “This never happened” fix-it fics or “this happened but” fix-it fics?

Why Not Both (but not at the same time).

40. Write a 9-word fic.

"Maybe someday we'll meet again, and things'll be different."

#thanks for asking!#beautiful mutuals #icemankazansky #thanks for these carly they were fun!!#and thank u for the gif <33

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novelconcepts · 3 years

Note

You saying more childhood AU is possible with the right prompt is just...

More Tess. All of the Tess. Tess the morning after the party, lives in my brain rent free. The teasing. The knowing looks. The Jamie and Dani being so in love and unashamed and also oops we forgot the roommate. And Tess being the wonderful person she is and not letting them get away with anything.

It’s the fact that they think they’re subtle, that really gets her.

Not that Tess is upset to find Jamie crashing with them the week following graduation. Of course Jamie is crashing with them. Where else would she go, now that Dani “it’s important to grow up and change and learn who you really are, or some such bull” Clayton has finally snapped up the hot gardener of her dreams? Honestly, if Dani let her walk out that door--especially after that first night, which, hello, gardener; these walls aren’t half as thick as they apparently think--she’d have forfeited all rights to sanity, and Tess would have no choice but to make her move instead.

No, she isn’t upset to find Jamie still here the following morning. Or at all. She loves Jamie. What’s not to love?

Honestly, so much to love. If she didn’t love Dani even more, she might have to really test the bounds of this friendship. Particularly when she opens her bedroom door to find Jamie--hair rumpled, dressed in a half-unbuttoned flannel and a pair of boxer shorts--at the kitchen counter. Like, warn a woman.

“Warn you about what?” Jamie looks blank, her hands prying open each cupboard with evidently-mounting disappointment. “You really don’t have any tea?”

“Warn a woman,” Tess repeats, hip-checking her gently out of the way and scrounging the supply of English Breakfast out from behind the stoner snacks. “Before you turn up in her kitchen looking all sex-rumpled. I haven’t even had coffee, Taylor, Jesus.”

Jamie blinks, taking the box from her hands. “O...kay. How was the rest of the party?”

“Not nearly as engaging as your night,” Tess informs her pleasantly, delighted when Jamie’s sleep-muddled expression lights up with embarrassment. “But an extravaganza in its own right all the same. Where’s my girl? I know you railed her into next week, but it seems bad manners to leave you to breakfast alone.”

“I didn’t--we--”

“Thin walls,” Tess sing-songs. “Like paper. Or, what, you’re English--parchment?”

“We have paper,” Jamie deadpans. Tess pats her shoulder, working around her to fill the kettle.

“Good fortune really does smile upon you. Ah! Sleeping Beauty arises!”

Dani, looking only slightly more functional than Jamie, is emerging from the bathroom with an expression that suggests she, at least, is very aware of the acoustics of their apartment. It’s so tempting to tease her about it--Dani has this truly adorable habit of looking like she might combust if pushed too far, the red of her face complimented nicely by the gold of her hair--but Tess figures some things can wait. Lord knows they’re going to walk right into it soon enough.

But like--so soon. Like, she goes off to take a shower, and comes back to find they still haven’t left the kitchen soon.

“Seriously?” She laughs, watching them leap apart. It’s too clear Dani has forgone the idea of coffee and bacon for the much-more-invigorating art of pushing Jamie against the refrigerator. Not that Tess can blame her.

“We--were just--”

“Right in front of my cereal,” Tess says gravely, shaking her head in faux-disappointment as she stretches over Jamie--whose hands are still rooted to Dani’s hips, the hem of Dani’s shirt dropping hastily back over her stomach--to retrieve a box of off-brand Lucky Charms. “No shame.”

They’re both making noises of disagreement, as though Tess hasn’t had her share of groping in the kitchen experiences to call on. She snorts.

“Look, far be it from me to stop your, ah, young love in its tracks. Just. Keep it out of my bedroom, is all I ask. Unless...” She wiggles her eyebrows. Jamie clears her throat so violently, it sounds as though she might fracture something.

“Shower. Should. I.”

“That sentence normally goes in the other direction,” says Tess helpfully. Dani swats her back, grinning.

“Got that out of your system yet?”

“Oh, not nearly.” Tess beams. “By all means, Clayton, show her where the shower lives.”

“I know where the,” Jamie begins to protest, but Dani is slipping both arms around her middle, pressing against her back to urge her toward the bathroom.

“That’s her polite way of saying if I don’t go with you now, she’s going to spend the next half hour fishing for details.”

“You still owe me those,” Tess calls after them. “Every last filthy one.”

***

They think the shower is noise-cancelling, too, Tess realizes about four minutes later. Jesus, these beautiful useless idiots.

***

It’s the lack of subtlety masquerading as Chill, really. The fact that every single time Tess leaves a room, she can count slowly to ten, poke her head back out, and find they’ve picked right back up where last she interrupted.

Step into the bedroom to change her clothes? Come back out to find Dani straddling Jamie on the couch.

Take a quick smoke break on the stairs out front? Glance through the window to find Jamie shirtless, the unmistakable tread of scratches running down her back beneath her bra.

Offer to run out for lunch? Spend an extra five minutes idly counting clouds, because fuck only knows the sounds Dani is making isn’t karaoke.

“You two,” she announces, tossing the pizza box onto the counter with a flourish, “are going to break something if you keep this up. I mean, you’re at least taking hydration breaks, I hope? Do I need to bring you a power bar?”

Jamie has the decency to look slightly ashamed of herself, though there’s a definite grin beneath the hunched shoulders. Dani, selecting a slice of pepperoni-and-banana-peppers, shrugs.

“Consider it payback?”

“For who?” Tess demands, delighted. Dani raises her free hand, ticking her fingers down toward her palm.

“Tyler, whose butt I saw like ten minutes before you introduced us. May, who you used to desecrate the kitchen floor. Carlos and Beth--”

“Liz,” Tess interrupts, “she goes by Liz these days.”

“--Liz, with whom you conveniently forgot I needed to shower before my presentation and took up the bathroom for three hours--”

“Okay, okay,” Tess snorts, groping for a dishtowel in some shade of off-white to wave. “Truce.”

“And that’s just this apartment,” Dani says cheerfully. She tilts her head to look at Jamie, whose face can best be described as aghast. “Back in the dorm, she used to sneak girls in after I was asleep.”

“You were a sound sleeper!”

“No one is sound enough to ignore a bed frame breaking, Tess.”

“I...avoiding college was the right choice,” Jamie says weakly. Tess bats her eyes.

“You’re saying you’ve never dreamed of breaking a bed frame with me, Taylor?”

Jamie darts a look around at Dani, her eyes just shy of screaming. Tess is having the best time of her life.

***

“Tell me honestly, though,” she says. Jamie gives her a sharp look, uncertainty obvious even as she reaches to accept the joint Tess is passing her way.

“Really don’t think Dani wants me giving you a play by play.”

“Dani, beloved of my soul, was fool enough to schedule a doctor’s appointment while you were still in town. She knows what I’m about.”

To Jamie’s credit, she doesn’t choke this time. She puffs once, twice, holding the smoke in her lungs an impressively long time before craning her head back and exhaling. "What am I telling you honestly?”

“You’re going to keep an eye on her, right?”

Jamie looks surprised. “Yeah. Not that she needs it, mind. Just. Yeah. Always.”

Tess sighs. “She doesn’t need it, but you know as well as I what that woman is like. Too good. Too fucking good for her own good, you know? Forgets, sometimes, that she can come first, too.”

Jamie offers a smile nearly wicked in its amusement. “Oh, I take care of that.”

“Yes,” Tess drawls, “darling, I can tell. You know, really relieved she never brought anyone home before now. I’m not sure my beauty sleep could have taken the abuse.”

Jamie laughs, leaning back and pulling a throw pillow into a loose embrace. “She doesn’t need anyone taking care of her. But...”

“But you can’t help wanting to, anyway,” Tess guesses. When Jamie nods, she takes another hit, lets the smoke burn in her chest. “She has that effect on people. Our girl would take a bullet for anyone, and it’s...impossible not to love her for it.”

“She’s the reason,” Jamie says softly, “I didn’t run. Reason I did a lot of things, some of ‘em really, really stupid. Sometimes I think everything I’ve ever done can be traced back home to her, one way or another.”

“That, my dear,” Tess says, “is what fools and songstresses alike call love, I think. Just...do me a favor, keep her from killing herself for those kids.”

Jamie nods. “I will. Promise.”

“Good,” Tess says lightly. “I like you, Jamie. You’ve got the hands of a sinner and the smile of a saint. I’d really hate to have to track you down and kill you for doing her wrong.”

***

For all the sex, and all the blushing that follows, it’s late nights like this one that really say it all. Nights where cards fade into lazy conversation fade into this: Jamie, asleep on the couch, her head resting in Dani’s lap. Dani, looking down at her like she’s never felt so at home in her own skin.

And Tess, watching them both, astonished by the lack of fear in the room. The lack of distance. The lack of uncertainty.

Dani, who has always been a nervous sort, whose panic attacks are so predictable on bad weeks, Tess came back from that first Christmas break with a laundry list of coping methods to offer--looks perfectly at peace. Her fingers stroke back Jamie’s hair, tracing her forehead, her nose, every brush of contact only seeming to sink Jamie deeper into dream. Dani has never looked like this before.

“You’re happy,” Tess says quietly. Not a question. Not a challenge. Dani smiles.

“Part of me thought she’d get sick of it, you know. Waiting for me.”

“Who could get sick of you?” Tess asks, and means it. No one in the world stacks up to Dani, on a list of favorite people. No one in the world ever could. If Jamie really did fall ass over teakettle for this woman when they were barely old enough to know what love was, she couldn’t be blamed for it. Not for a second.

“You’ll invite me to the wedding, of course,” Tess says, when Dani--eyes closed, fingers still tracing aimlessly--says nothing for a while. One blue eye emerges, her nose scrunching up.

“Jumping ahead, aren’t you?”

“She’d do it here and now, if you asked. Shit, I could get ordained, do it for you. Always thought I’d look nice in a little suit.”

“You’d be gorgeous,” Dani says, without a hint of deprecation. Tess blows her a kiss. “And...yes. If and when, I can’t imagine doing it without you.”

“As officiant?”

“I was thinking maid of honor,” Dani laughs. Tess leans back, smiling.

“That’ll do.”

The silence creeps in again, the sleepy indulgence of post-midnight living that feels so perfectly suited to the college experience. Nothing else, Tess suspects, will ever be quite this again--the quiet feeling like peace, the weariness feeling earned, not crushing. Jamie breathes out in her sleep, one hand drifting to gently grasp the hem of Dani’s shirt.

“Gonna miss you,” Tess says softly. “And this one, too.”

Dani smiles, a hint of sadness in her eyes. “It won’t be the same again, will it?”

“Nope.” And maybe that’s a good thing, she thinks. Maybe that’s exactly how it should be. Growing up. Changing. Learning who they ought to be. “But you’ll call.”

“And write,” Dani agrees.

“And send me pictures of your hot gardener,” Tess adds. “Lord knows, it’d be a crying shame to forget that.”

Dani laughs. “Never.”

“You did good, Clayton. Took you a minute, but--you did good.”

She lets the silence settle for real, lets Jamie sleep and Dani doze, lets herself sink into the armchair. They aren’t subtle, it’s true--she’ll probably wake tomorrow to find they’ve opted for a quiet round of the most wall-shaking sex she’s ever heard in Dani’s room--but that feels right, somehow. Good, to see Dani refusing to make herself small. Great, to see Dani refusing to temper an emotion this grand.

“I love you idiots,” she says softly. “You’re going to be just fuckin’ fine.”

#fanfiction #ficlet #the haunting of bly manor #dani x jamie #damie #AU one-shot #welcome back Tess I've missed you #love an OC I enjoy almost as much as the canon kids

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crimsonandcloverwrites · 3 years

Text

ok bhah ch11 my longest yeah boi ever

i’m literally... so excited I can’t even read it ok ok

oh no not the wedding invitations not this

i swear to god if we have to go through this wedding. knifeemoji

listen I have a fear that we’re gonna get the break up and the car accident same as canon dear god don’t put us through that either

no fears *literally everything that could make bhah more painful* several fears dot meme

god not the jamie invite. she cant even do it. another sign from god you are choosing to ignore

straight to Jamie’s house oh

lmao the red door I just worked out that’s a hill house reference from when I was wondering in like ch3(?) lol the inner workings of my dumbass brain never stop

“can we talk?” it’s happening what is happening

Dani was so tired of lying oh my god

my heart is literally beating so fast

alone in Jamie’s room bro wtf wtf

Jamie is just so soft and understanding always always aaaahhhhh

fuck she just wants out of this wedding so bad but she can’t even tell him

AAAHHH SHE KISSED HER OH MY GOD IT’S HAPPENING

fuck fgkjhdfkjgh this is not good oh no. Dani finally finally fucking doing something for herself and Jamie so aware that this cannot be happening like this right now

and yet both of them just falling into it anyway oh my goddddd

jesus christ jesus christ “Dani had half crawled into Jamie’s lap, kissing her with a fierce and fervent heat” I am on deaths door

god they’ve both wanted this for so so so so long I can’t believeeeeee

(i am so thrilled that y’all just went there right away btw)

“Please, just - I just want to feel how I’m supposed to.” oucchhhh Dani

god her just... knowing. after one kiss w Jamie that she can finally do it and talk to him and end it and it’s so terrifying but goddd yes

“You think I can ever say no to you?” oof

“Ask,” Jamie breathed. “Ask me.” fucking fuck the power of this line oh my god Jamie is so fucking ready to jump of a bridge for her it’s- the dedication the love the longing the everything I am going insane is it too early to start drinking at 1pm

you’re not you can’t NOT THE CANON DINER SCENE

fuck this is like watching a car crash i can’t look away it’s so fucking visceral and nerve-wracking and painful

but god I’m so proud of her for finally saying what she wants

oh thank fuck y’all didn’t take him out with a passing delivery truck

“You must have known. You know me.” oh god this sentiment always kills me

“She couldn’t say it — the words ‘I’m gay’ forever out of reach — so instead she said, “I can’t.”” my whole body is on fire oh my god this is.... too fucking real

jesus christ the near miss w the truck are u trying to kill me (i actually kind of love that Dani will have to deal w her feelings w him face to face instead of having to bury it all in grief like in canon I am so excited to see how y’all handle that)

a fucking HOUR in the car dfkjghdfkjh the torture

oh honey. literally both of them suffering so much ouch

her favourite saucepan pls this is all so awful and sad but that make me laugh so much the poor confused little duck I am glad she has her comforts

god poor Dani

"Is she here to cook something?" fgkjdhfkgjhfkjgdf

“No. I think you’re brave.” oh

“We’ll figure it out." listen listen I am undoubtedly losing my mind god this is soft

“She had spent so long being asked and not asking. Never asking. She never dared. To ask was to be known, to be made visible, words forging reality as surely as a smith’s hammer. And yet Jamie waited, letting Dani gather the courage herself.

"Can I -?" Dani said, "- stay?"” please fuck I am just so !!!!!!!! about Dani getting to know what she wants and having a fucking voice. just !!!!!!!!

“Jamie inviting her in” fucking just both of them finally getting some of that quiet courage w each other I am yelling so much

“Dani knew that it wasn't just her feeling this, that it had never just been her.” YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT BABEY

““But you do?” Dani asked. “Want to?”

Jamie’s answering laugh was brief and incredulous. “You have no idea.”” I AM: HOOTIN. AND: HOLLERIN

“I am here” hello? hello I am not coping I am on another plane of existence. DANI FINALLY FEELING SO PRESENT AND WHOLE IN THIS MOMENT

god they’re just holding each other i’m tearing up. Jamie is her home

Dani finally sleeping through the night ow my fucking heart

Mikey’s so chill about all of this sdkdhfdkj I love him

Jamie going out n buying her favourite jam... god the tenderness. love is stored in the strawberry jam and the hairdryer

hmmmmm her attraction to Jamie is so closely tied to a lot of really hard feelings this is gonna take a bit to work through huh???

aw Jamie going to Carson I am so happy she has her little band of gays to help her rn

I love that she can just kiss her now when she gets the urge like maybe chill out a lil just landing all these surprise kisses but like good for u girl. good for both of u

the warmth of the house hmmmmm I love that she’s found this esp because she is perpetually cold and Jamie is always warm but keeps it like that for the kid (and probably for Dani too) aaahhhh

cgjkdfhkjgh Dani is so thirsty poor Jamie trying to keep them in check. these moments are so fucking loaded holy shit

Dani Jamie and Mikey are the cuuutest lil family aw

god the tentativeness between them trying to figure this all out and the casual intimacy and just. all of it is so much and so beautiful to watch unfold

i love this little bubble inside Jamie’s house and Jamie kind of drawing the curtains around them both physically and metaphorically while she lets Dani figure things out and lets it settle between them

it’s all about the hands

oh my god Hannah instantly asking if she needs a place to stay she really is the best

soft little mornings with her Jamie like... once Dani finally defeats the ball of guilt in her chest there is so much goodness to look forward to and I am v glad she has that right now even as she is still struggling a bit. my girl needs all the sweetness in her life

also the idea of Jamie getting to wake up to sleeping Dani in her bed every morning after a lifetime of trying to repress her feelings... god

heh she’s already figuring out all the ways to push Jamie’s buttons god these two are going to have some fun w each other

this idea of learning the creaking floorboards of a new home is so... warm

Jamie leaving all the curtains drawn for her oh my heart keeping her safe keeping her safe

Nan would be so proud of ms Dani u know it’s true

awww Mikey comin home to keep her company

Mikey Dani time is always so sweet I love them

my god Dani n Jamie are so intense w each other and just so full of fucking desire... when those floodgates finally open will they even survive

oof Dani is dealing with soooo much ugh. Jamie always there with a gentle way to bring her back down to earth tho my hearrrtttt

“You’re allowed to be happy.” she is SHE IS ty Jamie Taylor voice of reason

a pinky promise to deal with everything together awwww

“why are you so good to me” “you know why” oh my goddddddd. that’s so soft that’s so gentle that’s so much love

Dani finding little bits in herself in media god i love this

Dani Mikey hours best hours

god Carson... sweet boy. And Judy sending over a whole bunch of food oof just. these quiet little reminders of their love for her. Dani’s about to go through a whole bunch more emotions huh?

fkjdfkjgfh Mikey going into protector mode when Carson is there pls i love hm

ohmy “our room” aaaaaaahhhhh

god Dani expecting him to be upset with her I am so fucking emotional. I relate far too much to Dani in canon and in this story and it’s just. painful as hell to see someone go through the things you know hurt the most holy shit

please Carson is so sweet and understanding and telling her he’s proud of her is making me cry so much I can barely see

this whole like.. uncomfortable but relief-filled kind of coming out between her and Carson is so so beautifully done I can’t stop fucking crying

“God, you two were agony to watch.” fglkdfgkjdfhkjgh Carson a voice of the people

“You deserve to be happy.” - Carson and also me and also everyone reading this

god he is so wonderful!!!!!! this reminder that she’s not alone and everything will be ok!!!!!!! Carson I love you so much

the box being described as “the beating heart of their childhood“ god the imagery

Jamie so sweetly making room for her and welcoming her into a home I am emotional again the tears have really been unlocked now I’m gonna be a mess the whole rest of this chapter (i say as if I haven’t been already)

the really sweet way Jamie gets her to open up and trust her with the things that have been on her mind

and Dani doing the same for her god this gentle honest space between them makes my heart feel so full I am just so happy that they’ve got each other

“I want you to stay.” please (also now I’m thinking about AE putting Stay on her Jamie playlist jesus christ I am being tortured)

they get... to wake up.... in bed together. i’m so close to crying again when will this stop

i kind of love there hasn’t really been any like... just no more kissing u know but we still get this insane intimacy between them in a way that’s not them shying away from the way they want each other but so carefuly and sweetly and honestly coming towards each other

awww them always waking up all tangled is so cuuute (also Dani feeling so safe and comfy with her that her subconscious is like lets latch on she is good she is home)

lmao Dani having to mediate between these two dweebs and their playfights is so good

Jamie having her lil family surrounding her aww

(also i just noticed the rating change oh god)

sfkjfhdg Jamie looking at her hips all dark eyes and wanting we’ve all been there girl

“you can look” BOLD DANI MY BELOVED

god these two........ the grabbing her silver chain god @ google how to breathe properly??????

“Then show me.” oh my god

fkgjhdfkj so much electricity they shorted out the power

“this is just as nice” when they’re just hugging please they are so soft

i love that there’s just like... gentle soft banter between them in these quiet moments so much

“Dani, give him more homework.” ghrfjkhjgkjgh

god the heated cheek kiss

this ‘game of chicken’ god they’re just.... really in it huh this is so fun

hmmm Dani going through the suitcases and sort of being able to bring some of herself/her past into this new place is so nice

heh this lil family and their snowfights are so cute

:( she can’t bring herself to eat Judy’s food

Jamie bringing her flowers oh soft

ugh they’re just so softly melting into being together it’s so sweeeeeeeet

“You’re lovely.” and the way Jamie just sinks into her with Dani’s fingers in her hair pleeease I am dying this is so warm

aaaahhhh they’re dancing soft soft soft

“gray eyes fluttered closed, as though the weight of Dani’s touch was too much to bear” god i am..... aaaahhhh

“a gentle calm settling within her. It had seemed that for all her life she had waited for the quiet of this” y’all this is so beautiful and lovely and wonderful and all the good things

ah that kiss. kinda feels like their first real kiss where they just get to be god I am so happy “a profound sense of finally” oh oh oh that’s such a pretty concept

god I love how much they just want each other that second kiss and them just all over each other is perfect and having to try and reel that in and being able to because they know it’s not going anywhere please it’s so so good

god Dani vs Desert Hearts I love this callback and the entirely different circumstances of her watching it again

dsjfhdkjfh oh no Dani losing her mind at Jamie touching her knee god these two have got the biggest storm coming

dfkdjhkgdjh god them like.... trying to take things slow but still letting things happen while having to be aware of Mikey is so funny but I kinda love it and how indicative it all is of them being so grown up and able to approach their relationship in such a mature way. as much as I wish they’d had their teenage love story I do like that it’s unfolding this way now.

“it struck Dani then that she couldn’t remember ever laughing while doing this.” aww

Mikey’s “oh gross” hahahaha poor kid

god this is so funny

“ferret kid” jamie why are u like this sfkjhdfkjf

oh lordt it seems we have reached the unabashedly horny phase good show ol’ chaps

god they’re still so soft tho this is so fun to read

i looove how flustered they both make each other w just their presence. it’s just so !!!!!!

lmao Dani knowing exactly what to do to drive Jamie insane is fdkgfdkjgh perfect amazing show stopping more neck kisses more teasing more barely restrained desire i love it

“the reckless rush of being in each other’s arms” AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

lmaooooo Mikey Jamie is going to lock you outside if u keep doing this

the fact it can just fade back to comfortable companionship too is like. ugh i love them together

“Yeah. You can touch me whenever you want.” oh jesus

“No more interruptions, no more waiting, no more holding back.” it’s happening god it’s happening everyone stay calm (also the slow build to this point has been so fucking perfect y’all are writerly geniuses)

lmao Dani is like please can we just get naked why do u want to watch a movie I am literally right here

oh she is not waiting anymore THAT’S MY GIRL GO GET EVERYTHING YOU’VE EVER WANTED I LOVE YOU

“What do you want?” god the tension

aaaaahhhhh just. them being so out of their minds with want but still all nervous and wanting to check in but still just. wanting this so much god this is *chef’s kiss*

lmao Dani already having the hair pulling thing figured out is so good. poor Jamie lol is she even going to survive this

god the fact they’re both still fully clothed n still getting this fucked up just making out n grinding on each other I love this for them

mum just came in to tell me dinner is ready I AM ALREADY EATIN GOOD

lmao fuck I am just... so thrilled for Dani finally getting to experience this get ur whole world rocked baby u deserve this

thumb in her mouth i-

“my idiot” pls that’s so soft

“You have me.” i know this is like. horny but it’s also so romantic sfgkjhdfkjg

ayoooo Jamie’s tattoo excuse me while I lose my mind a lil bit

my god Dani is so impatient to get her naked I love her for it so much “I just want to feel you”... ma’am

Jamie being all nervous is so cute aw

god having this lil moment where they just call each other beautiful n get all cute about it while they’re fully naked n grinding on each other.... perfection

god I can’t stop thinking about every other mention of Dani having sex w Eddie and it just being like adequate or like her not letting him touch her and now LOOK AT MY BABY GO SHE’S REALLY HAVIN THE TIME OF HER LIFE LITERALLY BEGGING TO BE TOUCHED LET’S GO LESBIANS LET’S GO

I feel like I’m like cheering Jamie on rn sfjkghdfkj u guys need anything? some snacks? a condom?? ur doing great!!

Dani crying and thanking her like this is an acceptance speech love that for her

Jamie kissing all over her face aww

I can’t believe this whole chapter is them just getting to fall in love for real

“I want to taste you” i am blushing goddamn Jamie get it

oh my god the dream. she’s literally living out her dreams

“that same focused intensity that could make kingdoms fall” I love that Jamie is just as into getting Dani off as Dani is getting off lmao GOOD FOR THEM

Dani: desperately tryin to get Jamie off. Jamie: are u sure u want to tho??? miss ma’am let the girl touch u already she deserves it (but i do love that she’s always just like.... never wanting to make Dani do anything she doesn’t wholeheartedly want to)

“You sitting here on top of me like this is doing more for me than you can imagine.” iconic jamie moment

Jamie literally just like.... ‘you can do whatever you want to figure this out’ is so sweet I love her capacity for just. giving herself over to Dani in every way (not just the horny ones) to let her forge her own path

“It was easy to understand now, the exhilaration of it, why people went crazy for it.” god I love this for her so much everything just falling into place

they’re so soft n comfy together and it’s all just so right and lovely

i love that once they’ve started they basically can’t stop honestly get it girls u deserve all the orgasms

“When did you know?” “Sixteen years.” oof my heart she’s known the whole time aaahhhh. all these lil memories god it really was all out of love I could cry. and Jamie admitting the scarf/scar thing whew she really carried around that moment on her face for the whole world to see (also lol at Dani being so fixated on it this whole time that’s so perfect)

heh they’re so cute with their lil teasing banter exchange

lol goddamn this so so spicy I am just dfklghfjkdjghkjdf (that is to say well fucking done I can’t even speak rn)

Jamie just being like you could literally just look at me and I am turned on I... love this whole situation for her so much

god they’re really just going all in Dani is getting like the.... lesbian sex speed run amen

oh god not Karen on the phone just hang up Dani do it do it

god she is so evil

omg she told her abt Jamie go off Dani I am v v proud of u right now

and she hung up on her godbless babe i LOVE your audacity

heh Jamie so transfixed by Dani’s lil purple sweater and skirt I love her

Dani u are such a tease sfkgjdfkg good 4 u tbh

awwww she got Dani’s desk for her oh my god that’s so lovely

Dani n Jamie being entirely not subtle over dinner w their lingering glances and Carson just laughing at them fkjghdkfjgh i love it. he’s so happy for them even w his teasing aw

aaahhh i just love Jamie giving her this space and this room in the house and Dani feeling so right in it

oooh an almost “I love you” god they’re just fuckin u-haulin in love perfection huh

and now we’re back to horny hours love this for them. gotta bless that desk somehow huh!?

i love the mentions of all this soft stuff about belonging when they’re about to rail each other it really rounds it out emotionally

“Get on your knees.” OH MY GOD THE JAMIE ON HER KNEES REDEMPTION MOMENT IS THIS REALLY HAPPENING

HELL YEAH IT IS this is truly what we all deserve

oh my god literally ripping her clothes off her fuck i love how desperate they are for each other and just how into this they both are always

dfgkjdfh jesus Dani are u ever going to be able to get work done at this desk again after Jamie does.... all of this to u on it

“Good girl.” the single most powerful sentence in the lesbian language

jesus christ this is still so incredibly steamy sdflkhskhg it never ends. and them like.... experiementing a bit w some different um. approaches? lol good 4 them good 4 them (and us)

my god them instantly getting all soft after about making each other happy please they’re so dang cute

ok love that we are also getting Dani on her knees it’s equality.gif

this little “I like you” “I like you too” confession right now is... so fucking soft and like... after everything they’ve gone through they still have the power to kinda knock each other off their feet w lil things like this huh?? sappy lil shits

oh no Judy I am scared

holy shit Dani “Didn't think you'd love me anymore” owwww my heart

god Judy is such a good mama I love her so much. reassuring her she’s still a part of the family my god I am so emo. she loves her so much

aw I love this lil shared bathroom scene after so many awkward moments w Dani and Eddie in their bathroom and so many mentions of her fogged reflection. things are finally clear and it’s wonderful!!

lol Jamie well if u didn’t want Dani to get all horny u shouldn’t have worn suspenders!!!!! it’s simple math!

god Dani has changed so much this chapter which only takes place over a couple of weeks right?!?!? after so much anxiety and being so unsure of herself this is so fucking beautiful to see

stop the car thing oh my godddd. she doesn’t even care about having her own cause she’s so happy w the person she’s sharing with I’m so overwhelmingly happy

“You’re perfect.” please I will cry this chapter was so perfect (also so are the memes I cackled so much)

#bhah #lmao this is long as fuck #god this chapter was good I love everythng about it #we did it joe #lord what an experience

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mk-wizard · 3 years

Text

Are any of the Burns LGBTQA?

Hello, Transformers fans. Today’s topic is a question raised by the fabulous @petrichornial and considering that LGBTQA fanfiction is very popular in the Transformers lore, it does raise the question if any of the characters in Rescue Bots officially are. Before I get into my honest, respectful analysis, I want to make things crystal clear;

I think the concept of being LGBTQA being sin is not only ignorant, but also false. If the Lord had a problem with them, he wouldn’t keep putting them on this Earth. His concern is if we are good and the fact that LGBTQA people are capable of love is proof of goodness.

This is not an attack on slash fanfiction. Just because something isn’t or most likely isn’t true doesn’t mean you can’t have fun in your own AU fanfic. With that said, anyone who uses this article here as an attack on other fans who write slash fanfiction involving the Burns will be reported by me first. Yes, some slash fanfiction has unhealthy and sometimes, criminal undertones, but most doesn’t and most fans of it are harmless, so just leave them alone if you don’t like what they write.

Anyway, I will start by saying that I am absolutely sure that none of the Burns including uncle Woodrow are transgender, genderfluid or non-binary. We have seen them show enough skin to be able to tell that they are all born with the genders they identify as and there is no talk or scenes of them taking anything transgender people who have undergone surgery would still need. Also, none of them identify with the “they/them” pronoun. Each one of them identifies as “he/him” or “she/her” and consistently only identifies that way. So all this evidence tells us that none of them are non-binary or genderfluid and I am very sure none of them are transgender or intersex.

Now, we get into the gray area which is orientation and to do this analysis properly, I will observe each family member individually. First up is the head of the household and the star Chief Charlie Burns.

Charlie Burns has only shown a romantic interest in women as he was at one time married to a woman and he even got involved with a nurse during the course of the series, so he most definitely likes women. He is also very progressive as well as open minded as he welcomed aliens into his home and grew to love them as family, his best friend Doc Greene is black and he always shown kindness to everyone regardless of who or what they are. He is also confident enough to be openly in tuned with his masculine and feminine as he loves to wear that apron that has the torso of a woman in bikini on it. However, if he is so obvious about who is and has the confidence to put it on display this blatantly, I think it is very likely that he is straight as he has only shown a romantic interest in women and if he also had one in men, we would know by now. While I have no doubt that he would be very accepting if any of his kids, friends or relatives were gay/lesbian/bisexual, he is clearly not gay or bisexual himself. He is straight though clearly not narrow.

Next up is Kade Burns who we know for sure isn’t gay at least because he most certainly and shamelessly is head over heels for Hayley. Despite not being the sharpest tool in the shed or handling romance with an outdated approach, it is clear as day that his feelings towards Hayley are deep and he values what they have no matter how many times he fumbles. So he is most certainly not gay. With that all said, there is a small fraction of a chance that he might be bisexual or pansexual. While he has never shown a romantic interest in anyone who was not a woman or just not Hayley, the possibility is there and knowing how macho and insecure Kade can be, he would be in the closet about it in the beginning.

Then we have Dani Burns who like Kade, cannot be a homosexual because she had a very real relationship with Taylor despite it being complicated and at times, on the verge of not working out. She clearly can be attracted to men so she is not a lesbian. However, like her older brother, it is possible that maybe she is bisexual or pansexual, though if she was, she would be open about it because Dani is a lot like their father Charlie. She is open and proud about who she is, so if she does swing either of those ways and we just did not get the chance to see it, she would not hide it.

Next up is the heroic nerd Graham who like the others listed so far is also not a homosexual because he too has been in a romantic relationship with someone of the opposite gender who might add is also a great match for him: Amy. So that puts that to rest. Like Kade and Dani, it is possible that he is bisexual or pansexual, but we never got a chance to see it. If he did swing either way, like Dani, he would most likely be open about it simply because Graham is pretty easy going about what he is for the most part.

Now, the wild cards start coming out. When it comes to orientation, Cody Burns is a blank slate because he’s just a child. He is not romantically aware yet altogether, so the idea of dating or kissing anyone disgusts him in general. Also, his relationship with Frankie Greene is clearly just them being best friends and it is heavily implied in the series that it will never be anything beyond that. However, I recall that in one episode where he was physically aged into an adult, he displayed disgust when Hayley kissed him. It could simply be that he still had the mind and emotionally maturity of a little boy so romantic gestures would be off putting to him. Mind you, it could have been a sign that he could be or rather, will turn out to be gay or asexual when he matures. In Rescue Bot Academy, Cody is a teenager and has no interest in girls or romance in general which backs up the possibility that he might be asexual. Or like me (I’m straight if you’re curious), he is simply a late bloomer when it comes to being romantically aware and will not show in interest in relationships until his adult years. In short, Cody is to officially be determined, but there are some possible flags that hint that he just might be asexual or gay. Like I said though, these are just possible little flags and officially, he’s still just a blank slate.

Lastly, we have Woodrow who we know for sure is single, always has been and remains so throughout the series’ run while showing no romantic interest to anyone altogether nor does he ever bring up ever having had a crush, ex or dream significant other. While it is never officially confirmed, evidence suggests that Woodrow is most likely asexual. It is possible that he can be something else on the list yet isn’t interested in a long term relationship, but if I had to wager, I would go with him being asexual.

And that concludes my analysis. Overall, the possibility of any of the Burns family being LGBTQA+ is there, but in very specific ways and when it comes to Charlie, the evidence suggests that he is as straight as they come. I hope my analysis was fair and respectful. Like I said, I could be wrong, but I am just going by the facts that I have before me.

Thanks for reading. Let me know what you think of this theory. And please, have a good day and stay safe.

PS: Support LGBTQA+ rights. Like I mentioned before, if you have the capacity for love, that alone is proof of goodness within and this group is not the exception. They merit just as much kindness, respect and decency as any other people do.

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a-bang-for-your-bucky · 3 years

Text

Playin' With Fire

Summary: Dani has moved in with Will and Benny Miller. One night they throw a party and she finally gets to meet the final Special Ops teammate, Frankie. There is an obvious connection between the two, but what happens when life throws a roadblock in the way of them being together?

A/N: So here it is. My first ever Frankie fic, my first ever Pedro Character fic, my first ever fic that has all the parts completed. I would like to say a BIG thank you to @221bshrlocked for the mood board because hers is TEN times better than any of mine were. Each part will have their own warnings. Translations will be at the end of every chapter, let me know if any of them are wrong. Also let me know if I've missed any warnings. Y'all forgive me if my writing is crap.

Warning: Explicit language, mentions of someone getting handsy, um dirty dancing?, mentions of sex.

Word Count: 4,205

It was a warm summer day, Benny’s birthday to be exact. Will had decided to throw a party at their house for him. Will had mentioned that their childhood friend, who they called ‘Tequila’ just moved in with them. Frankie had shown up early to help Will assemble the new grill he had gotten. He never expected for his entire life to be flipped upside down.

He knocked on Will’s front door three times before it swung open and there she stood. Dirty blonde hair that hung just below her breasts, eyes so blue it put the sky to shame. He was sure he looked like a damned fool, mouth agape, probably catching flies. Then she smiled, and Frankie’s heart beat faster than ever thought possible.

“Hey, you must be Catfish. Will told me he was expecting you.” She greets him and her voice sounds like a fucking angel. There was no way that she wasn’t messing around with Benny. She looked just like his type.

“I’m Dani, Will and Ben’s roommate, but everyone calls me Tequila.” Frankie groans internally, he was so screwed. She opens the door a little more and moves out of the way. “Will’s in the backyard.” She points through the house.

Frankie hurried past her and mumbled a “Thank you”. Frankie’s eyes were trained to the floor as he briskly walked toward the kitchen and out into the backyard.

“Fish!” Will bellowed with a huge smile on his face. “I guess Tequila let you in.” The two men embraced in a bro-hug. Frankie nodded, moving over to where Will had the grill pieces laid out.

“She did. You never mentioned your new roommate was a woman and hot.” Frankie responded, looking over the directions. “You know man, you pay like fifty extra bucks and they put this shit together for you.”

It took Frankie and Will three fucking hours to put the grill together. By the end of the last hour, Frankie was cursing Will, telling him he’d never help him do something like this again; Although, they both knew that was a lie. The two men walked into the kitchen, where Dani was prepping the steaks for dinner. “Finally done, boys? I threw a couple of buds in the fridge for y’all.” She chuckled as the back door opened.

Frankie knew he shouldn’t, but walking up to the fridge, he couldn’t help but steal a gaze at her back side. The shorts she was wearing left almost nothing to the imagination. Her tanned legs seemed like they went on for days. Her feet clad in converses, which made Frankie laugh, because who wears those any more.

Dani heard the laughter and turned around, seeing Frankie looking at her feet. "My shoes funny to you, Catfish?" She asked, with a playful smile on her face.

Frankie's head shot up. " No, no. I love Chuck Taylors as much as the next person. It just surprises me that people still wear them." He explained himself, hoping she didn't catch him staring at her ass, too. Frankie opened the fridge and grabbed two beers, before asking her if she wanted one. She shook her head, stating she doesn't drink beer. Frankie wondered what that meant, and handed the other beer to Will who watched the scene unfold in front of him with a smirk on his face.

There was about an hour to kill before everyone showed up to celebrate Benny's birthday. "The steaks should marinate for at least another half hour." Dani explained to Will, "And make sure you don't burn 'em this time, Ironhead." She teased him, and he threw a hand over his heart, feigning that it was broken. The two went about the kitchen prepping side dishes for the night.

Frankie was outside, trying to figure out why the grill wouldn't light and he was sure Will fucked something up. He couldn't help but wonder what Tequila and his friend were talking about.

Dani turned to her best friend, "So, what's Catfish's story?" She asked, twiddling her fingers. Will looked at her with a raised brow.

"Frankie? Why?" Will questioned her teasingly. Blush covered her cheeks and she averted her eyes to the floor.

"I dunno. He seems sweet." She replied and Will smirked, giving her a knowing look. "Will, stop it. All I said was he seems sweet." She playfully smacked the other blonde.

"Well, Ironhead. I figured out what you fucked up." Frankie's voice boomed as he opened the back door. He noticed that the two were talking and apologized for interrupting.

"It's fine, Frankie." Dani smiled, "What did this dumbass do now?" Frankie realized that was the first time she said his real name, and it was the greatest thing he has ever heard.

Frankie turned to Ironhead. "Maldito idiota. You forgot to connect the gas line. The whole place could have gone up." Will's eyes almost popped out of his head.

Tequila turned to Ironhead. "What the fuck, Will?!" She screeched. Will threw his hands up in defense.

"I'm sorry. I got distracted." He tried to save his ass. "I swear I connected it."

Frankie and Tequila rolled their eyes. "Well, I hope your girl of the week knows she almost killed us." Tequila groaned and walked outside, knowing exactly what was keeping Will distracted. Frankie just shook his head and followed her.

"Hey," he started as he walked up to her at the cooler. She gave him an acknowledging nod as she pulled a bottle of tequila out. "Oh. Is it time for the hard stuff,already? Una chica después de mi propio corazón." The spanish rolled off of Frankie's tongue and Dani could have fallen over.

She would never admit it to anyone, but she had a thing for languages. Or maybe she just had a thing for Frankie and his Spanish. She wasn't sure which. "Yeah, well after finding out your best friend almost killed you for a few nudes from his fling of the week, tequila seems appropriate." She forced a laugh. Frankie definitely caught on that she described Will as her best friend and that he was having flings.

Frankie nodded in agreement. "So, is this why they call you Tequila?" He tried to change the subject, pointing to the bottle of Patrón. She shook her head 'no'. Before she could tell him, Will stuck his head out the door, yelling that Santiago was here.

"Santi!" Tequila squealed, rushing to the door, and she missed the look on Frankie's face. It was a mix between hurt and confusion. How did she know Santiago when Frankie had no idea she existed? Frankie groaned and walked toward the house to greet his friend.

Dani had already made it inside and was wrapped in an embrace with Pope. “Fuck,” Pope groaned with a smile as Dani jumped into him. “Hey, Tequila.” He hugged her tightly.

“Look here, jerkface,” She said as they separated, “Next time you hook up with one of my friends and leave me to deal with her crying, I’m kicking your ass.” She poked him in the chest to get her point across.

Santiago just hung his head and mumbled a “yes ma’am” before Frankie caught his eye. “Lo que hasta hermano” He greeted one of his oldest friends. He looked at Dani and mouthed “help me” to Frankie, earning another poke from the blonde girl.

“Estás solo, hermano. Ella da miedo.” Frankie smiled, pointing to Tequila. She huffed and crossed her arms.

“Oh, fuck you guys. I’m fluent in Spanish. Deja de hablar mierda de mi.” The words rolled off her tongue with ease and Frankie almost lost his shit right there. Lucky for him, Will broke up the tension.

“Benny just texted me, he will be here in twenty. Tom is bringing Molly and will be here in about fifteen.” Dani excused herself to go get ready, claiming she wasn’t presentable for a party. If it had been up to Frankie, she wouldn’t have changed at all. He found himself excited when she came back about fifteen minutes later in the same shorts, shoes, and a cropped Guns-n-Roses t-shirt.

The party was in full swing. The seven of them were gathered around the fire pit. The group was too many drinks in and knew they would be crashing here. Thankfully Benny and Will had the room.

“So, Dani. Why do they call you Tequila?” Molly had asked and Will and Benny started laughing. Dani just shook her head. Benny answered before she could.

“Because Dani can knock you on your ass with one good shot, just like Tequila. Trust me, I know.” He explained, speaking from experience. Molly looked at her with wide eyes and she just shrugged.

“I bartended my way through college. Sometimes an asshole would get too handsy. It paid off to have two protective guys who taught me how to throw a good punch. Plus, I really like tequila.” She winked at Frankie, referencing their conversation earlier in the day, taking a sip of her tequila sunrise. She made a face, realizing it had watered down. “I’m going for another, anyone else need one?” She offered and everyone raised an empty bottle.

She got up from her chair and turned toward the house. Frankie got up too, “I’ll help you,” he offered, ignoring the whistle Santi let out. He was clearly feeling good. Frankie flipped him a quick bird and continued into the house.

Inside, Dani was already grabbing bottles out of the fridge, mumbling about how they have already almost finished off their stock. “Oh, here” Frankie started, leaning on the counter. Dani closed the door, turning her attention to the man beside her. “Let me help.” He said, taking the bottles out of her hands, seeing her struggle to hold them all. “Can I ask you something?” Frankie gets the words out before he changes his mind. She hmms in response.

“How have we never met? I mean you obviously know Santi.” He takes his hat off to run a hand through his hair. Dani smiled at the sight of his hair all disheveled.

“I’ve been asking myself that all night. You do seem to be the better of the bunch.” She flirted, hoping he would return the gesture and he did.

“You are definitely not what I was expecting when Will said they had a roommate.” He smiled, leaning a little closer to her. Dani noticed and moved closer herself. Before they could cross that line, they were startled apart by a very inebriated Benny.

“Tequila!” Their drunk friend slurred, “Wha’re you ‘n fish doin’? Cat, you hittin’ on my girl?” He tried to be serious, but Benny stumbled over his own feet into Frankie.

“Woah, Benny. Careful.” Frankie caught him and set him up right. Dani laughed, he always was a lightweight.

“We were just about to bring the drinks out.” She says, grabbing the bottles off the counter, leaving a couple for Frankie to carry.

Back outside, Dani and Molly danced to whatever music Will had playing. “Yeah!” by Usher came on and Molly squealed that she loves this song. “Dance with me, Tequila!” She pulls her closer and Dani lets her, the alcohol clearly gone to her head. The two girls are all but grinding on each other. Tom quickly gets up, knocking his chair backwards. He takes Dani’s place dancing with Molly, grumbling something she would never repeat in public.

Frankie wanted nothing more than to join her now that she was dancing alone, but Santi beat him to the punch. “Baila conmigo, cariño.” He whispered in her ear and she giggled. Frankie wished it had been him to get that noise out of her. Dani shook her head and pushed Santi away.

“Solo en tus sueños, playboy.” She responded and it was Frankie’s turn to laugh. Dani walked away from Santi over to where Frankie sat. “Dance with me, Frankie?” She asked sweetly. How could Frankie say no?

He followed her just as a Def Leppard flowed through the speakers. She began moving her body to the beat of “Pour some sugar on me”. Frankie did his best to keep up with her, but he kept losing concentration, especially when her ass connected with his crotch one to many times. His hands instinctively went to her hips and pulled her closer. “Joder, princesa. Tienes que parar antes de que pierda el control.” He groaned into her neck where only she could hear him.

She turned to face him, throwing her arms around his neck to pull herself closer. “Tal vez eso es exactamente lo que quiero.” She purred in his ear.

The sun beamed through Dani’s window way too early the next morning. She groaned and rolled away from the penetrating light. As she turned, her hand hit a warm body and it elicited a groan. “Too early.”

Dani’s eyes shot open, trying to see who was beside her. Looking around, she realized that she was not in her room, but instead in Will’s. “Will?” She questioned, berating herself for going this far with her best friend. The other person threw the blanket off their head and Dani let out a sigh of relief. Seeing Frankie took the weight off of her shoulders.

“Hermosa, did you just call me Will?” Frankie asked, sleep thick in his voice. Dani was so embarrassed.

“Sorry, fish. I opened my eyes and saw that we were in Will’s room. What the fuck happened last night?” Dani questioned the man beside her as she sat up to assess the room. She looked around for any indication that something transpired between them last night.

“Trust me, Tequila. You’d know if we slept together.” Frankie sighed, as he swiped a hand over his face. Cocky much, Dani thought; However, he was right, she didn’t feel like she had sex. “I need coffee.” He griped, throwing his legs off the bed and standing up. Dani caught him out of the corner of her eye. He had on sweats and no shirt. She turned her head, shamelessly checking him out, before he pulled his shirt on. “Take a picture, Teq.” He laughed and she threw a pillow at him.

Dani forced herself out of the bed too, happy to see her drunk self had put on decent pajamas. The two padded into the kitchen as quietly as possible. They had passed Santi and Ben passed out on the couches.

“Where are Molly and Tom?” Dani whispered to Frankie and he just shrugged. Frankie rummaged through the kitchen searching for the coffee. “Teq, where are the filters?” He yawned, holding up the coffee can.

“Shit, we might be out.” Frankie whined at her answer. “Come on. There’s a coffee shop within walking distance.” She continued, heading towards her room. She opened the door and found out where Molly and Tom were. “Holy shit!” she gasped and immediately turned around. Frankie heard her outburst and rushed over to her, seeing the same sight as her, Molly perched on Tom’s lap, moving in an obvious way.

“Jesus,” Frankie said, covering his eyes.

“I’m just gonna borrow some clothes from Benny.” Dani said walking away and closing her door. Once in Benny’s room, they found Will sound asleep. Dani quickly picked up some sweats and a tee from Benny’s drawer. “I’ll be right out.” She told Frankie as she entered Benny’s bathroom.

When she emerged, she had dressed and her blonde locks were haphazardly thrown into a bun. Frankie loved this look on her. She was just as beautiful as she was last night, and this looked more natural on her. “You’re staring, Catfish.” She teased him, “Let’s go get coffee before anyone else wakes up.”

The walk to the coffee shop was a pleasant one. It was about 7am and the North Carolina humidity hadn’t set in yet. Frankie and Dani chit-chatted the whole way. She had learned that he had met the guys while in the service. He joined right after high school, just like them. He was their pilot. His favorite color is black, and that is exactly how he likes his coffee. He drives the same chevy he got on his 18th birthday, and has no intentions of getting rid of it because “she still purrs like a kitten”.

He learned a lot about Dani, too. Her favorite color is purple. She likes her coffee with just cream. She met Benny first, since they were the same age. She is an only child, so Ben and Will are basically her older brothers. She just finished her residency at the county hospital and is getting ready to take her boards. She absolutely loves 80’s hair bands and country music, but has a soft spot for R&B and rap.

They were nice enough to get coffee for everyone, even though Tom and Molly seemed to have enough energy this morning. “I have to buy a new mattress now.” Dani cringed at the thought of what Molly and Tom were doing.

They got back to the house to see that everyone was now awake, and fully clothed. Dani gave Tom and Molly a dirty look and they both apologized, confusing everyone else in the room. Frankie started handing out the coffees, getting mumbled “thank yous” from the group.

“Are those my clothes?” Benny asked, gesturing to Dani. She nodded and proceeded to tell everyone why she had to wear Benny’s clothes.

“Holy shit. You need a new mattress now.” Will snorted, his face drawing up in disgust.

Dani laughed, “That’s exactly what I told Frankie!” Molly’s face was beet red and Tom just hung his head. “Awh, come on, guys. We’re just kidding. Although, I do need a new mattress.” She tried to lighten the mood.

Frankie quietly sipped his coffee, trying to figure out if he should ask Dani out on a date. They’ve only known each other for a day and Frankie can’t imagine his life without her, even just as a friend.

What seemed like hours passed and the group slowly trickled down until it was just Benny, Dani, and Frankie. Benny was the next to leave, loudly saying he was going to take a nap and for Frankie to behave himself. Frankie just shook his head at his friend.

“I guess I should be heading out soon.” Frankie sighed, not wanting to leave. Dani nodded, trying not to look disappointed.

Frankie scooted closer to where she was sitting on the couch, lifting her outstretched legs over his. The two sat in silence, purely enjoying each other’s company. “Fish,” Dani started, “You wanna get dinner sometime?” She asked, biting her lip nervously. Frankie looked at her, shocked, that she asked first.

“I would be damn stupid to say no.”

Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months. Dani and Frankie had become best friends. Even through all of the flirting, they never crossed that line. Dani was working at the hospital, and Frankie was back on rotation at the airport. He was gone most days, but he was due to come back for a short time.

Frankie was ready to be back home. He loved flying, but now he had something worth being on the ground for. He had called Dani before his last flight left, telling her he would be back by 9am the next day.

Like clockwork, Frankie was knocking on the door at the Miller Party House™ by 9:30am. Dani begrudgingly dragged herself out of bed and threw on her robe. She scurried toward the door, pulling it open to reveal Frankie with a bouquet of sunflowers. Frankie laughed, “No need to get dressed up querida, it's just me.” He teased her.

Dani pulled him into the house and hugged him tight. “Fish! I can’t believe you’re here.” She said sleepily. Frankie smiled at her tiredness. She just looked so damn cute in her fuzzy robe and bed head. “Give me thirty and I’ll be ready.” She yawned as he released her from his hold.

He watched her pad her way down the hall to her room, his smile never leaving his face. He made his way to the kitchen, knowing where everything was, he started a pot of coffee. Even though they were going for breakfast, he knew she would want a cup to-go.

True to her word, thirty minutes later, Dani emerged from her room, dressed in distressed jean and a black T-shirt. Her hair was thrown into a messy bun, her signature go to. She walked into the kitchen where Frankie just finished making her cup of coffee.

“Just the way you like it.” He promised with a wink, as he handed her the cup. She happily accepted the hot beverage. Taking her first sip, she moaned at the heavenly taste.

“You are the best, Cat.” She murmured, walking past him, only stopping to place a sweet kiss to his cheek. She all but inhaled the drink, before she slid her feet into her trusty converses. The two made their way outside and climbed into Frankie’s Chevy.

The drive to their usual diner, Luanne’s, was a short one, but it was filled with laughter. Frankie was at his happiest when Dani was with him. They pulled into the parking lot, Frankie backing his truck into ‘his’ spot. He hopped out of the cab, rushing to the passenger side, so that he could open Dani’s door.

“Who says chivalry is dead?” She joked as the door opened and Frankie held out a hand for her to take. She gladly accepted it and slipped out of the truck. The two walked hand in hand to the door. Frankie pulled it open to see Luanne standing behind the counter.

“Well look what the cat dragged in! I ain’t seen you two in a hot minute.” She greeted them, not bothering to get menus because they always ordered the same thing. “Your usual booth is open, go on and take a seat. I’ll get the coffee.”

Frankie and Dani mumbled a “thank you” in unison as they moved toward the back of the restaurant. Just as they were getting comfortable, Luanne walked up with a thermal carafe and two coffee cups. “What have y’all been up to?” she asked, sitting down the coffee and some cutlery.

“I just got back into town.” Frankie explained, “Had to drag this one out of bed.” He laughed as Dani stuck her tongue out at him.

“Well I’ve been taking extra shifts at the hospital. I think I’ve earned the right to sleep in.” She shot back at him with a smile.

“Y’all are the cutest. What are we getting today? The usuals?” She didn’t need to ask, she already knew. They nodded. “ Alrighty then. Coming up darlin’s.” Luanne walked away, leaving them to each other.

“So, extra shifts at the hospital?” Frankie asked her as he poured coffee, sliding her a cup.

“Yeah. Residency is kicking my ass. I’m trying not to fall behind.” she told him. “I take my boards in a week and I’ve logged almost no time in neuro.” She sighed. She didn’t want to go into neurosurgery, but she still needed the hours.

“You are going to be the best damn trauma surgeon Memorial has ever seen.” Frankie promised her, “And if they can’t see that, then fuck 'em.” He smiled at her. Luanne brought them their breakfast and they halted their conversation.

When they were done eating, Frankie insisted on paying, telling her she could get it next time. They left the diner and went back to Dani’s place. “You have me for the day, hermosa. What do you wanna do?” Frankie asked her. Dani tapped her pointer finger to her chin, pretending to think.

“I believe we have a show to catch up on, Morales. Seeing as I can’t watch it without you.” She teased him. “You grab the snacks, I’ll get the drinks, and get Hulu up.” He nodded in agreement and they separated.

When Frankie entered her room, she had blankets and pillows set up in a mock fort on the bed. How she did it so fast, he will never know, but he isn’t complaining. The two settled down and turned on ‘Sons of Anarchy’.

The show was gruesome and Dani hated watching it without Frankie. “Hey, fish?” She started, “Doesn’t Jax look a lot like Will? I mean, if he had long hair?” She asked, and Frankie studied the screen.

“Nah, I don’t see it.” They laughed and continued watching. She wasn’t sure how many episodes they watched, but she looked over and Frankie had fallen asleep. She closed the laptop, moving off the extra pillows, and covered Frankie with a blanket. His signature hat was falling off his head and she set it on her nightstand.

Dani sat there on her bed, looking at her best friend sound asleep. He looked peaceful. His face smooth of the worry lines he normally sported. His curly hair in disarray. She couldn’t help but smile. In that moment, she knew there was nowhere else she’d rather be. She curled herself up in the bed next to him, where she drifted into a relaxing slumber.

Translations:

Maldito idiota - Fucking Idiot

Lo que hasta hermano - What’s up brother

Estás solo, hermano. Ella da miedo - You’re alone, brother. She’s scary.

Deja de hablar mierda de mi. - Stop talking shit about me

Baila conmigo, cariño. - Dance with me, honey

Solo en tus sueños, playboy - In your dreams, playboy

Joder, princesa. Tienes que parar antes de que pierda el control. - Damn it, Princess. Stop before I lose control.

Tal vez eso es exactamente lo que quiero - Maybe that’s exactly what I want.

Hermosa- beautiful

Querida - Dear

#kat writes #triple frontier #frankie morales #frankie catfish morales #santiago garcia #santiago pope garcia #pedro pascal #oscar issac #frankie x ofc #santiago x ofc

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idontwanttospoiltheparty · 2 years

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i literally only care about caro's opinion and yours so what are your thoughts on the short film ‼🎤

Thank u Dani 🥰🥰 Lucky for you (?) I'm overly Taylor positive.

So, for the longest time while watching I was thinking: "This is cool and it does really match my image of the song but the song is already complete within itself," if you see what I mean? It's detailed enough that I didn't need a film to show that to me.

I did think that one-take dialogue scene was great and explained the dynamic of the Red relationship extremely well. Especially the whole "hipster shtick" that's an undercurrent on Red. I think she mostly talks about it in a jokey manner on the album but the scene really drives home why it hurts so bad. And the guy is a JERK but he's also not some dehumanized villain. You get him to some extent. Fantastic acting, honestly.

I find the usage of titles a bit tacky and unnecessary but it's not like they bother me particularly either. On the other hand, I think the fact she filmed it on 35mm film is super poignant and matches the flashback theme of the song. It also looks gorgeous! Thinking it over, I really like the beginning: "Are you real? Did I make you up?" because it's being shown positively, but I think it's actually a question that she asked herself long after the relationship ended in a way. A good introduction to the utter lostness of the song.

But when we got to the end with the book I actually thought "Wait. This is something new!" The song is based on the idea that remembering is a painful experience in of itself, but the movie suggests that at least remembering gives you the power to tell your story. It's a bit like "The girl in the dress wrote you a song."

I specifically liked that it's a book and not a song though, because how many Literary Fiction® books are there out there written by men about how they needed some manic pixie dream girl half their age to get a personality or stop being depressed or whatever? That kind of a book about an age gap sympathetic towards the woman is nowhere near as prevalent in our literary canon, if that makes sense? So I loved that. Yes, Taylor, fucking own him!

Tangent: I'm thinking a lot about how the Jake-Taylor age gap was barely mentioned on the original Red and I think maybe a lot of us (me included) sort of assumed that their problems weren't due to age cause of that, but now I'm remembering that Taylor did get backlash for Dear John and maybe was especially afraid that "making the same mistake twice" would provoke even more backlash.

Overall, I enjoyed it! Taylor looked a bit weird with that shade of red though lmao. Oh, also: I often find videos that interrupt the song annoying but it kind of works here cause the song has so many parts that you can easily start and stop in a way.

#i hope this is good enough for you 🥺#harrisonbridgers #taylor #ask

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jess-rewatches-prodigalson · 3 years

Text

Face Value (S2, E7)

My time-stamped thoughts for this episode. As always I reference Malcolm’s mental health. A lot. So if that’s going to be a trigger for you, don’t keep reading.

SPOILERS AHEAD:

0:05 - Hold your horses. Malcolm taught at Quantico?!? I mean, I realize that he probably just did the occasional guest lecture (like most profilers?) but I’m still stupidly proud of him. <3

0:50 - ngl Malcolm’s a good lecturer. Take it from a university student.

1:13 - “It’s okay. We don’t know what you did and it’s not that mu-....BREATHE” Holy shit. I’m torn between ranting about what a great actor Tom Payne is and losing my mind because this scene is heartbreaking. Look at Malcolm. I swear he’s reminding himself to breathe - not Ainsley. He’s completely panicking but he’s trying so hard to be strong for Ainsley. This boy is an absolute treasure. Brother of the CENTURY.

1:41 - “You’re right Ainsley. I screwed up.” NO NO NO NO NO. Can you hear the sound of my heart shattering?!? This scene is so much more devastating the second time. When you know Ainsley is putting ON A SHOW HERE. Look at Malcolm’s face. He’s devastated. He blames himself for AINSLEY’S actions. He’s starting to genuinely believe that he’s no better than Martin Whitly. Malcolm’s depression/anxiety is through the roof in this episode. I honestly won’t be shocked if Malcolm has a complete mental breakdown in the next few episodes. Hell, I don’t think I’d be surprised if he tries to OD on his meds. This boy is in crisis and I’m terrified for him.

1:44 - “I think I did too.”.....this line is interesting. Is this part of Ainsley’s act or is she showing some regret for putting Malcolm through this much emotional torment? She can clearly see that this whole situation is literally destroying her brother’s already fragile peace of mind.

1:55 - “Today could be the day!”.....the day that everyone finds out about Endicott and Ainsley.....seriously, Malcolm’s daily affirmations this season have done nothing but feed his anxiety.

2:04 - OF COURSE. A call from Martin. Malcolm is going to have a mental breakdown. It’s just everything. All at once. I’m getting secondhand anxiety FOR him.

2:35 - hahaha Martin is a crazy, evil, pain in the ass but damn is he entertaining.

2:55 - 1) Ainsley looks adorable in Malcolm’s hoodie. 2) Ainsley straight up leaves his loft later in this episode. Did she hid a change of clothes in the loft before Malcolm got home last night? Or does she actually leave her big brother’s apartment in his clothes?

3:05 - “Getting hit by a train might be better.” Yep. Malcolm is entering a dangerous territory. I know depression is different for everyone but for me, when I start joking - out loud - to people I love about death in passing....things are bad. Like I’m getting suicidal bad. I know Malcolm has a morbid job and he talks about death all the time but this feels like Malcolm is starting to consider suicide as an option.

3:34 - I can see Ainsley’s “You were trying to control me” perspective. BUT honestly? Take a step back and listen to the desperation and fear in Malcolm’s voice. Anyone with half a brain cell can HEAR how scared Malcolm is and how deeply he loves his sister. Ainsley has known Malcolm her entire life. If she was functioning on all cylinders - she would know that Malcolm is just being a protective big brother. He’s not trying to control her - just help her. But this has been a theme for Ainsley since season 1 when she brought up visiting Martin during family dinner. She seems to believe that Jessica and Malcolm think that she’s a “fragile flower” and that she can’t take care of herself. I understand how that could be frustrating but I also find it concerning that Ainsley doesn’t seem to understand that they aren’t treating her that way because they think she’s weak or stupid but rather out of love. Ainsley acts like a petulant child about this sort of thing (anger, whining, eye-rolling). Ainsley acts very entitled a lot, in the sense that if something doesn’t go her way she just throws a hissy fit (think reporting and/or any Whitly family squabble). Ainsley is messed up. Unlike Malcolm, she doesn’t seem to have any self-awareness when it comes to her behavioural eccentricities. Malcolm actively tries to improve his mental state. Ainsley just throws a hissy fit when the world doesn’t bend to her will.....and this stream of consciousness Ainsley rant just became wayyyyy longer than I had anticipated (sorry).

3:41 - “Promise me.” See that look? Ainsley is pissed at Malcolm. This girl’s anger is concerning me.......what if (crazy thought) the season finale is Martin escaping Claremont to stop Ainsley from killing Malcolm?

3:43 - I wish I could be happier about this hug. Malcolm is finally getting a hug but.....he instigated it and he’s not the one being comforted sooooooooo I’m still unsatisfied.

3:49 - “Hey, you look...terrible.” SCREAM IT FROM THE ROOFTOPS DANI!! God. I love how concerned she is about Malcolm. IDC how you feel about Brightwell. If you don’t think they’re good friends - you’re a moron.

4:05 - This is the moment when I went....oooohhhh yeah. LDP directed this episode. That’s probably why he’s not in this scene.

4:10 - JT is a GOOD husband. Give him a medal. Seriously - last season he was going to watch the Taylor wedding live with Tally (who was going to wear a hat <3 ), this season Mr. Masculine casually throws out stats about the Housewives. hahaha I don’t even care if JT genuinely enjoys the Housewives or not. I’m just so utterly delighted at the idea of him watching it with his wife and having a good time with her. <3 JT is the definition of a good husband and I’m HERE FOR IT.

4:34 - .......seriously? I thought Edrisa had realized that this crush is unrequited last season? I love Edrisa but her obsession with Malcolm is getting a little creepy. Like “13 year old in love with the 40 year old math teacher” creepy. It’s sort of cute but also like - gurl. No.

4:38 - Ok. Dani’s reaction to Edrisa hitting on Malcolm saves the scene for me. Lol.

4:51 - Ugh. That is a really creepy corpse.

4:56 - Look. We’ve all obsessed about it already but I have to bring it up: MALCOLM STILL HAS THE BRUISE FROM THE ELEVATOR. SOMEONE GIVE THE MAKEUP DEPARTMENT A MEDAL. THANK YOU. THANK YOU FOR REMEMBERING MALCOLM’S PHYSICAL TRAUMA.

5:21- ......ok maybe I’m projecting my cynicism here but anyone who has framed newspaper clippings about themselves in their office is seriously egocentric. Maybe it’s just me - but that’s a massive turn off and takes someone out of the running for “angel” status.

6:10 - I’m sorry for every time I thought Jessica was a crazy rich lady during season 1. Birdie is so so so much crazier.

6:36 - “Only the men you date.” Bitch. OMG. Who says something that backhanded and cruel to their sibling?!?!? ......oh wait. I remember how this episode ends :|

7:15 - THANK YOU. I’ve been wondering about the status of Martin’s medical certification since I watched the pilot. SO happy to find out that he couldn’t weasel his way into keeping it.

7:37 - Like most of you, I’ve been creeped out by this whole Martin/Capshaw interaction since it was released as a promo clip. Seriously - it’s creepy. There’s an upsetting amount of subtle flirting here. I’m not sure what it is about Capshaw but her whole energy is just really unnerving to me. I immediately hated her in the promo. Istg Capshaw is an undercover serial killer or something. AND IF SHE BECOMES A LOVE INTEREST FOR MARTIN I WILL LOSE MY SHIT.

8:06 - Oh yeah. She’s either romantically interested in Martin or she’s a psychopath on the DL and is playing him.

8:12 - YAY!!! The Yankee mug returns!!! <3

8:34 - “Sometimes the most monstrous people are the ones hiding in plain sight.” Ouch. I know the writers like to project Malcolm’s emotional turmoil on the case of the week but hearing those words come out of Gil’s mouth?!? Ouch. That hurt Malcolm. Bad. It wasn’t even directed at Malcolm but damn. This is not helping his mental health. At all.

8:41 - Gil. Is. Concerned. <3 :) .....pretty sure Gil also suspects about Endicott and Ainsley by now too. .....hmmmmm maybe that comment about monsters was Gil’s way of trying to get Malcolm to confess (or to gauge Malcolm’s reaction)?

9:15 - I feel so bad for Malcolm here. He’s literally juggling everyone’s problems. Ainsley’s murder situation. Jessica’s personal drama. But is he dealing with his emotional problems? No. He’s too busy being a good son/brother. SOMEONE PAY ATTENTION TO MALCOLM. HE NEEDS A HUG.

9:35 - Deer. In. Headlights. Well....at least Dani knows Malcolm’s about to have a mental breakdown. This boy just got more information to help him crack a murder case and he looks confused, startled, and lost. He’s usually excited and motivated. This Endicott situation is slowly killing Malcolm. I don’t know how much longer he can struggle under the weight of the guilt.

9:48 - Look at this. Ainsley is pissed off that Malcolm isn’t paying attention to her. We know that this whole 2nd murder was a sham so WTF? Is she really just that hungry for attention? That sounds like Martin Whitly to me - the narcissistic psychopath who needs attention like an addict needs cocaine. Also AINSLEY’S acting here?!? We know that she’s lying to Malcolm but holy shit. She’s a really good actress/liar? What else has she lied about?!?

10:05 - Ok. So just when did Ainsley remember? I honestly think she’s known since at least 2x01.

10:20 - Look. I understand that Ainsley is pissed that Malcolm is trying to ‘control her’. But did she even listen to the desperation and fear in his voice? This boy wants her to stay in the loft because he’s scared of who she might hurt if she’s out in public, unsupervised. He’s not trying to abuse or hurt her - just protect her. Is he misguided -maybe? Should he have called the cops on Ainsley right away - probably. But he didn’t out of love. Ainsley doesn’t even seem to realize how much this whole situation is hurting Malcolm and that’s the biggest problem. She doesn’t show any remorse at killing Endicott. She’s just pissed off that Malcolm lied about it. SHE KILLED SOMEONE an she (outwardly at least) feels no remorse. This girl is a psychopath (sociopath?) and this will NOT end well for Malcolm and Jessica.

10:27 - This whole scene was awesome btw. Tom Payne flawlessly communicated Malcolm’s panic, fear, anger, and desperate attempts to stay calm. And Dani’s blatant concern (and suspicion) of Malcolm and his mental state. AND Ainsley being a little brat. Ugh. So beautiful.

10:45 - I love this scene. I love the fact that they have the type of friendship where Dani’s not afraid to call Malcolm out on his crap (trying to hide things from the team). I love that Malcolm isn’t offended that Dani called him out. He doesn’t lie. Ainsley is lost at the moment. Malcolm is more honest with Dani about how the whole Ainsley thing is affecting him than he is with anyone else. I love that Dani still looks suspicious and concerned. I love watching Dani piece this whole thing together. I’m honestly at a point where I think Dani is going to know about Endicott before Gil. I love that Dani gives Malcolm honest, judgement-free advise. Because she doesn’t like seeing how much pain Malcolm is in. I love that Malcolm isn’t completely shutting her out. <3

11:00 - “What if she already has?”.....yep. Dani is totally piecing the Endicott situation together.

11:09 - “I’m overthinking it.” THIS. There is a split second where you can see the betrayal on Dani’s face. She knows Malcolm is hiding something and she’s hurt that he doesn’t trust her enough to let her in. She’s also probably hurt because she views this as a lie - which brings back 1x20 memories.

11:35 - “Even when they’re as beautiful as you.” Ugh. I love this so so so so much. Look at how Dani absolutely lights up at Malcolm’s unintentional compliment. I relate to Dani in the sense that I’m a woman in a male dominated field (engineering). I can’t tell you how often men that she works with have probably objectified her, belittled her, and sexualized her. Malcolm isn’t doing this. He doesn’t call her hot. He doesn’t comment on her body or how she dresses. He doesn’t even acknowledge that she’s a woman. He just calls her beautiful. But he does it in a way that you can tell he’s being genuine. He doesn’t expect anything in return for the compliment. He’s not trying to play the long game. He’s just thinks she’s beautiful. He doesn’t even realize that he said it. BECAUSE Malcolm is in profiler mode. He’s focused on the murder - not Dani. He mentioned that Dani’s beauty off-handedly because 1) he believes it and 2) it was relevant to his profiling train of thought. BUT LOOK AT HOW MUCH IT MEANT TO DANI. <3 <3 <3

12:00 - Why is Chabra exiled to the corner of the room?!?! Someone explain this tomfoolery. Is it literally to just get across that Chabra is not the alpha in this corrupt plastic surgery business?!?

12:16 - Ew. Please never say YOLO. Ever. It’s cringy when kids say it but it’s so so so much worse when someone over 25 says it.

12:18 - hhahahahahahaha OMG. Dani’s face after he says “yolo”.

12:31 - Yep. This dude is an asshole. DO NOT try to convince Malcolm to get plastic surgery. The dude has enough problems without adding dysmorphia to the mix.

12:41 - Yep. Chabra is the little puppy that follows Donahue around and does the grunt work.

12:50 - LOOK AT THE NOD DONAHUE GIVES CHABRA when Chabra denies that stock has gone missing. Can you arrest someone for being a rich, corrupt, asshole?! Ugh. Hate him.

13:20 - Ugh. I really want to know more about Dani’s past. Who in the NYPD tried to belittle, micromanage, or sexualize her just because she’s a woman?

13:30 - “I want Donahue to be the bad guy.” PREACH SISTER.

13:48 - “Easy. We just isolate him with our own alpha males.” hahaha OMG. LET”S GO. I was so pumped when this scene cut to JT and Gil. BUT I was also a little sad. Malcolm doesn’t consider himself to be an alpha male (I mean, he’s not) but it really just drove home to be that Malcolm sees himself as broken. Gil has been Malcolm’s positive male role model for years. But Malcolm doesn’t think he’s anything like Gil. Malcolm thinks he’s broken where Gil is whole, weak where Gil is strong, and bad when Gil is good. It just sort of broke my heart.

14:00 - hahaha Chabra is just a wimp. Watching Gil and JT play angry cop, calm cop was so so so good though. <3

14:05 - This was the moment that I remembered LDP was directing this episode. I’m not usually someone who notices camera work or anything but this was a really cool shot.

15:00 - Oh c’mon. Seriously? Edrisa’s crush has gone too far. She knows he doesn’t like her romantically. Everyone knows it. Please stop this. I’m getting secondhand embarrassment.

15:16 - Did Edrisa think they were going to do it in the morgue?!? Those flowers?!? Like wtf. I can’t.

15:29 - I’ll give props to Malcolm here. He’s being really kind to Edrisa here. BUT HE NEEDS TO TELL HER HE’S NOT INTERESTED BECAUSE SHE’S CLEARLY NOT GETTING THE MESSAGE.

15:33 - Ugh. Look at how uncomfortable Malcolm is. This is upsetting.

16:08 - “What?!? How do you -” Panic. Pure panic in Malcolm’s eyes. Damn. This boy is spiralling. Someone needs to find out about Endicott. Malcolm can’t keep trying to protect Ainsley and Jessica alone. It’s literally killing him.

17:14 - “All she could see was the ugliness she felt inside.” “That’s a sad way to live.” .........the parallels between the plastic surgery, dysmorphia, and vengeful crime of the week to Malcolm’s current mental health and Ainsley’s crime is slowly killing me. I’m honestly getting annoyed that the other characters aren’t picking up on all the subtle references Malcolm’s making to the fact that he thinks he’s a monster. I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO COMFORT HIM. THAT’S ALL. WHY IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK FEDAK!??!

17:30 - Another point to the Dani/Malcolm friendship. She takes out the gun and pushes Malcolm back. Is she trying to protect him? Technically, yes. BUT she’s just doing her job. I love that Malcolm respects Dani enough to let her take charge and do her job. I love that he’s secure enough about his masculinity to let her.

18:15 - Yikes. This woman is 90% plastic. Cosmetic plastic surgery is terrifying.

20:16 - Another reminder of the woman’s ward. Either Sophie Sanders or Ainsley is going to end up in that ward soon (I’m still half-convinced that Sophie is going to appear out of the woodwork and take the fall for Endicott).

21:49 - “...convinced her that she would never have a career unless she looked the part.” <3 Look at how disgusted Gil is when Dani tells him that. Gil is a good man and I love him forever. <3

22:33 - I love this. Dani and Gil are both concerned about Malcolm and communicating it in looks. It won’t be long until there’s a team intervention for Malcolm’s mental health (or at least, that’s my headcanon - if someone wants to write me a fic about it I’ll love you forever).

22:44 - WTF GIL. WHY AREN’T YOU ASKING MALCOLM WHAT’S WRONG?!?! IS IT BECAUSE YOU ALREADY KNOW AND YOU DON’T KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT IT YET?!?!

22:49 -.....soooooo does this mean that Gil already knew that Birdie existed?!? How often did Birdie appear after Martin’s arrest?!?! I WANT DETAILS.

23:06 - Holy shit. Look at that little smirk Ainsley shoots Malcolm when he first walks in and sees her. Ainsley is maliciously toying with Malcolm and I DON”T LIKE IT.

23:14 - Jessica is concerned. I promise you Ainsley and Malcolm have rarely - if ever - fought like this in front of her. I was raised in single parent home after my abusive dad left. I know how that changes the sibling dynamic. No matter how genuinely pissed off you are - you don’t stress Mom out more. If you’re just annoyed with each other and doing regular ‘sibling squabbling’ - then you whine and argue in front of Mom. But if you’re seriously angry with each other - you deal with it when Mom isn’t home to see it because no matter what - you both appreciate how hard Mom is working to keep what’s left of your family together.

23:28 - “Malcolm. Looking more like your father every day.” BITCH. Did she just say that because she watched Malcolm go off on Ainsley? Sure, Malcolm was a little controlling (probably similar to a situation Birdie witnessed between Jess and Martin back in the day) but HOLY SHIT. That is your nephew. Maybe he’s having a bad day. Maybe being told he resembles a serial killer is really damaging to his already fragile pysche. I don’t like Birdie. AND I DON”T LIKE THAT JESSICA DOESN”T STAND UP FOR MALCOLM HERE.

24:00 - I don’t like this. These Martin+Capshaw scenes are really hard to watch. Martin is still acting like Martin - manipulative, egotistic, manicA. But he’s also acting like a professional doctor (an asshole doctor but still). It’s really disconcerting to watch Capshaw take his medical opinion seriously. Plus - there’s something about Capshaw that creeps me out. I just haven’t figured out what it is yet. But I’m pretty sure she’s a bad lady.

24:16 - “What bit should I use?” - See this? No. Just...no. I don’t like how she’s taking Martin’s medical advise to heart so readily.

25:04 - Why was Martin allowed to watch the procedure?!? He’s clearly getting a sick amount of pleasure from the blood and drilling. Look at the way Martin grins at Capshaw too. Martin is planning out an entire scheme to manipulate Capshaw into helping him escape. You can see the metaphoric lightbulb above his head.

25:29 - This meal. Seriously. Was I the only one who got a glimpse of the meat in a red sauce and thought “human meat”?!? No wonder Malcolm’s main food group is liquorice.

25:44 - Poor Jessica. She is not having a good time. Jessica’s behaviour in this scene is really interesting though. Jessica repeatedly shoots apologetic looks at Malcolm. She looks at Ainsley with fear. She looks super uncomfortable. She’s not saying much because she desperately wants a relationship with her sister but she also doesn’t want to belittle her son’s career. She’s proud of Malcolm - in her own way.

26:00 - “The family trust fund would run dry.” hahahahaha YES MALCOLM. THROW THAT SHADE. hahahaha

26:23 - “Most of the time anyway” Wow. Uncalled for. I know Ainsley is mad but this isn’t cool. I have this nagging feeling in the back of my mind that Birdie has been approached by Europol about the Endicott murder. I have this terrifying notion that Birdie is trying to collect intel so she can sell the information to Europol. If I’m right (which I’m probably not) this comment will not help Malcolm’s case.

26:41 - hahaha look at how annoyed Jessica is. Is she annoyed because her children are openly fighting in front of their Aunt when Jessica wants to portray the “perfect, undamaged family”? Or is Jessica annoyed because what Ainsley just said was out of line and she’s scared of Ainsley right now?

27:02 - “Why would you do that? I told you I would handle everything.” This. This is why I will argue that Ainsley is way out of line. Yes, Malcolm is sort of trying to control her. BUT listen to his words, the desperation and fear in his voice. Malcolm is trying to protect Ainsley. Ainsley has every right to be annoyed with him but if she was functioning at an adult mental capacity she’d be able to see that he isn’t being malicious.

27:35 - The fact that Birdie is a backstabbing, lying bitch is so frustrating to me. Look at how badly Jessica wants to have a healthy relationship with her little sister. Jessica just wants a girl-friend to confide in and drink with. I’m heartbroken that Martin stole that from her.

28:05 - I know LDP was directing this episode but JT or Dani should’ve called Malcolm. Why? This conversation between Gil and Malcolm (WHEN GIL IS WEARING HIS COAT) just makes me wonder - where is Gil going? JT is at Donahue’s apartment. Dani and Malcolm are going to talk to Chabra. Where is Gil going?!?

29:07 - ....how did Donahue get the coke into the cheetah? Was there a release thingy (like in a piggy bank) that Malcolm just elected not to use in the panic of the moment?

29:14 - “What else would you hide in a cheetah?” hahahahahaha

29:40 - “No. No. Only if I got the dose wrong.” Yikes. Malcolm is operating in full panic mode here. This is not good for his mental health.

30:08 - “This is the worst cooking show ever.” hahaha this was hilarious but cooking show? What? Do I not watch enough of those? Because I don’t see the link.

30:38 - The moment when Malcolm looks at Dani with fear. He thinks he just killed Chabra and he’s terrified that Dani is looking at him with hatred. :(

30:46 - The two seconds when Malcolm thinks he killed someone. Look at his face. That boy is broken. Again - if he doesn’t have a full on mental breakdown soon I’m going to be so annoyed with the writers because NO HUMAN CAN WITHSTAND THIS MUCH TRAUMA THIS QUICKLY - WITHOUT ANY EMOTIONAL SUPPORT - AND COME OUT FUNCTIONAL.

31:03 - “I do not miss drugs.” :O Dani :( Sweetie <3 Ugh. This line was heartbreaking because it hurts to remember that Dani had a drug problem. But it’s also really great. She was just in front of 1 gram of cocaine. She didn’t grab for it. It didn’t reawaken the urge to use in her. She was strong enough to say “I don’t miss this life” and say it OUT LOUD in front of Malcolm. <3 Friendship. She’s starting to trust Malcolm more. This is good....until she finds out about Endicott.

31:45 - Wait. If Birdie knew about Endicott and Jessica.....does she know about Gil?!?!

31:49 - “Trust but verify.” That’s such a heartbreaking way to live. I hate that she has to live in a world without trust because of what Martin did. I want Jessica to be happy. So so badly.

32:06 - .....how did Jessica find out about the book?!!?! Seriously.

32:17 - “Mummy”. Mrs. Milton is alive?!?! What. OMG. So....but how? Jessica is living in the Milton family home. Jessica is rich. But Birdie has been cut off from the family money. However, it’s clear from this conversation that Jessica and her mother aren’t on speaking terms. So how did this work? When did Jessica move into the Milton family home and why? Where is Jessica’s money coming from? Did Jessica invest her trust fund money smartly and make a fortune? Does Jessica still have access to the Milton family bank accounts?!? AND WHERE IS JESSICA’S DAD?!!? I WANT MORE INFORMATION FEDAK.

32:49 - Malcolm is his mother’s son. Look at this. Jessica is so hurt by what Birdie has done. However, Jessica sighs, takes a breath and helps her little sister out at the cost of causing herself pain. Malcolm would do the exact same for Ainsley. He has.

33:40 - “And do we need to talk about last night?!?” Gil has been different this season. Less soft. More strict.

33:51 - Look at how Gil stares at Dani here. He’s annoyed and concerned. Concerned because she was in close proximity to drugs last night. Annoyed because he created a monster. Gil put together is badass, sarcastic daughter with his unstable, awkward son and they are creating a headache for him.

34:41 - “even for consultants?” hahaha

36:50 - The irony that our killer of the week is a woman who is in pain, feels disfigured, and murders in revenge is so so thick.

37:18 - “It’s enough to drive anyone insane”.....like the emotional pain that Malcolm is currently suffering from?

38:42 - “The best revenge is letting him live like this.” The moment Malcolm realized that Ainsley was manipulating him. Look at the hurt and fear on his little face. :(

39:00 - Ugh. I can’t tell who’s manipulating who in this whole Capshaw+Martin relationship but it’s all gross. I swear if they become romantic I will puke. These two are a psychopathic match made in heaven.

40:08 - I could write essays upon essays about this final scene but I need to sleep. So it’s going into point form without time stamps:

First off - Halston Sage and Tom Payne give us an AMAZING performance in this scene and they deserve an Emmy for it. Seriously.

Look at how Ainsley walks into the room. She’s self-satisfied. She feels no remorse. She’s pleased that Malcolm has been suffering.

Look at how utterly empty Malcolm is when he greets Ainsley. This boy is in shock. He’s so deeply hurt and he just had one of his greatest fears confirmed - Ainsley is like Martin.

“Do you have any idea what you put me through?!?” This. Yes, Malcolm is upset and hurt but there’s a part of me that genuinely thinks this question isn’t rhetorical. There’s a part of me that thinks Malcolm is desperately trying to get Ainsley to admit to feeling remorse so that he can convince himself that his baby sister isn’t gone forever.

“Do you?” Ainsley is mad. She has a right to be. Malcolm did lie to her. He probably should’ve told her the truth. HOWEVER, if Ainsley was a functional adult - she would’ve just confronted Malcolm about it. She has every right to be pissed but her behaviour has been downright petty, juvenile, and cruel.

“Underestimated me. For months.” Is this the root of Ainsley’s anger? She mentioned something similar in 1x6 when Jessica and Malcolm tried to stop her from visiting Martin. She resents Jessica and Malcolm for treating her like a child. For trying to protect her from Martin. On one hand, I understand - that’s probably suffocating and frustrating. On the other hand, Ainsley’s acting like a child so....why wouldn’t they treat her like one?

“I have given up everything for you!! I don’t even know who I am anymore.” This breaks me. Malcolm is screaming through tears. He’s so utterly broken (this doesn’t count as a mental breakdown Fedak....you better give me more). Malcolm is rightfully frustrated that Ainsley doesn’t acknowledge that he literally threw out his moral code to protect her. That when this gets out - his relationship with his only real friends since he was 10 years old (JT and Dani) will probably want nothing to do with him. Malcolm probably thinks that Gil will abandon him WHEN the Endicott thing comes out. Malcolm has thrown his fragile mental health down the drain to protect Ainsley. He thinks he’s a monster. Yes. Malcolm made the choice to protect Ainsley. Ainsley doesn’t have to be grateful. She doesn’t have to respect his decision. But acknowledging that his decision was made out of love would sure help. Malcolm wanted to be a good big brother so badly that he threw away his sense of self.

“Protect me? Or control me?” Wow. Okay. I get it. Ainsley feels controlled which is bad for someone who likes being in control. But Malcolm was never trying to control Ainsley. Malcolm was trying to control a situation. Not a person. Is what Malcolm did right? No, lying to Ainsley wasn’t a great choice. But telling her the truth also wasn’t a great choice. He was damned either way.

“For someone who spent the last few decades trying to recover from being gaslight; it’s ironic how quickly you resorted to it.” Uncalled for. Was Malcolm gaslighting Ainsley? Technically, yes. HOWEVER, one of the main criteria for gaslighting is that the gaslighter is aware that they’re gaslighting someone. I honestly don’t think Malcolm realized he was gaslighting Ainsley - look at his face when she mentions it: he looks heartbroken. BESIDES. How is AINSLEY NOT GASLIGHTING MALCOLM RIGHT NOW?!?! “That’s exactly what Dad would say.” She’s trying to convince Malcolm that he’s just like Martin. She’s made him believe that she murdered a second person. She made him an accomplice to her fake murder. She knowingly continued with this ruse after he came clean and told her the truth. And he was nothing but supportive and protective. Malcolm helped her hide a body. Why is Ainsley playing the victim?!

Look at the torture on Malcolm’s face right before he apologizes to Ainsley for lying to her. This boy is being gaslight and he doesn’t even realize it.

FURTHERMORE I DON’T RECALL AINSLEY APOLOGIZING TO MALCOLM FOR MAKING HIM 1) HIDE A BODY, 2) LIE TO THEIR MOM, 3) LIE TO GIL, 4) AN ACCOMPLICE TO A SECOND (FAKE) MURDER, 5) LYING TO MALCOLM ABOUT THE SECOND MURDER. She just says, “Maybe it was a little over the top.” Come on. No.

“I appreciate that.” SERIOUSLY. Ainsley doesn’t even have the curtesy to say “I’m sorry too.” or “I know you did what you thought was best”?!? Her response feels bitter and angry. She doesn’t forgive Malcolm. She’s still livid despite the fact that her brother is literally breaking apart in front of her. There’s no questioning the genuineness of Malcolm’s apology. That’s sincere pain and remorse.

This whole scene is super disturbing because Malcolm is on the verge of tears. He’s visibly upset. Yet - Ainsley is channeling a quiet, disassociating anger (similar to what she looked like right before she murdered Endicott). She’s completely consumed by anger. She’s not acting rationally and it’s really disconcerting to watch the contrast between the two siblings.

“I had to make sure that you were never going to mess with my head again.” .....you know, a functional adult human (hell, even a half-functional adult human) would just verbally confront their sibling about it. They probably wouldn’t fully trust or forgive their sibling right away but they wouldn’t pull a stunt as cruel and malicious as Ainsley just pulled on Malcolm. The problem with Ainsley’s behaviour vs. Malcolm’s is this: Ainsley is intentionally hurting Malcolm out of anger. Ainsley wants revenge. Malcolm reacted out of fear and panic to protect Ainsley. Malcolm just wants to be a good big brother. Neither of them are perfectly in the right but Ainsley is so so so out of line.

“You need to lighten up. We got away with it.” Ainsley is a serial killer. Say it from the rooftops. This is the first time she’s shown an emotion other than anger/disassociation all episode. Ainsley is happy that they got away with it. Malcolm is crumpling under the guilt and grief but Ainsley is happy.

“No one does this murder stuff better than us.” Holy shit. I can’t. Malcolm looks so so so heartbroken here. He just realized that his sister is gone forever. AND AINSLEY damn. This girl needs some serious help. She’s going to kill again. She liked it the first time. I bet you she slaughtered the pig just to get her fix. She could’ve boughten the pig’s blood from a butcher shop or something but I bet you she killed the pig herself. And I bet you she liked it.

Hoxley is a flamboyant gay and a cocky profiler. That’s just a fact.

I can’t. Alan Cummings will always be the villain from Spy Kids to me. I don’t know how I’m going to take Hoxley seriously.

Yoooooo Endicott’s head is creepy af.

Damn. This isn’t good. Hoxley is going to ruin Malcolm’s life. I can feel it.

Okay. I loved this episode. I have a lot of feelings about it (obviously). I’m so bitter that we have to wait until April 13th for the next episode. See you guys next time. If you read this far - thanks for hanging out.

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