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tangents-within-tangents · 2 months

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The Bad Batch as Penguins of Madagascar Quotes

Bc I’ve seen a few posts making this magnificent comparison and both of these squads are near and dear to my heart and bc I need a distraction from the s3 premiere ahhh

Tech: *mission relevant info* Hunter: Tell me something I don’t know! Tech: Without mucus your stomach would digest itself Hunter: … Hunter: Tell me something else I don’t know…something less disturbing

Hunter: (to Caleb) It's okay, kid. We're not going to hurt you Crosshair: *cocks his gun* Not true, Hunter, they did authorize lethal force

Wrecker: *absolutely decking his bros* You pillow fight like a bunch of little girls!

Crosshair: What part of "zip it" eludes you?! The "zip" or the "it"?!

Echo: I don't mind saying it, that guy vexes me. *narrows eyes* He's a vexer.

Hunter: Boys, no training tonight. It's game night! Tech: Trivia! Let's play trivia! I dominate trivia! Omega: Oh! Can we play Simon Says this week? Tech: Yes, Simon says we play TRIVIA!!

Crosshair: I find reason tedious and boring. We'll use force.

Echo: I'm sorry, boys. I sometimes resort to sarcasm when facing the unknown Tech: No doubt

Hunter: Oh I’ve seen accident prone, try Wrecker and Crosshair! With a Chandrilan lantern! And SIX BOTTLES of rocket fuel!! Tech: Worst talent show ever

Hunter: There's no such thing as too paranoid, Omega. Remember that, and forget you ever heard it!

Tech: SCIENCE! WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?!?

Omega: I have an idea! But I'm not sure how safe it is Wrecker: I like it already!

Crosshair: *while fighting* You cannot win, Hunter! I am fueled with a boiling hate! A raging fury! Hunter: And a babbling mouth! *slaps him*

Omega: No! I swore I’d never use my adorability as a weapon again, and I meant it!

Echo: Wrecker, cover Omega’s ears, I intend to use my angry words

Tech: This red line shows the frustration level of a really smart person forced to take orders from some dunder-brained boob. As you can see the frustration just keeps rising and rising and rising. I mean, why don't they put the smart guy in charge, huh? IT DOESN’T MAKE ANY SENSE! SOMETHING HAS GOT TO GIVE, PEOPLE! AM I THE ONLY ONE SEEING THIS?!

Wrecker and Omega: *run in making incomprehensible panicked noises* Hunter: Anyone catch that? Echo: *nonchalantly interprets it exactly* The Batch: … Echo: What? I’m fluent in panic

Tech: Cool cars go faster. That's a scientific fact.

Cody, in his one episode: I believe now I know why “volunteers” ends in “tears”

Hunter: No batcher gets left behind, that’s why! Wrecker: What about Crosshair? Hunter: Okay, one batcher gets left behind Omega: and Echo? Hunter: Maybe two batchers get left behind Tech: Um… Hunter: *groan* Comparatively few batchers get left behind, okay?!

Omega: I thought you agreed this was a dangerous weapon! Wrecker: Which is the best kind! What good is a safe weapon?! Tech: He has a point

Hunter: Avert your eyes, young Omega, you’ll never be able to unsee this! Tech, recording bc that’s his freaking hobby: Don’t worry about it I’ll burn you a dvd!

Crosshair: *standing outside the Marauder* Hunter! I have brought you a hand drawn greeting card! It says “Roses are red. Posies are green. Sorry about Bracca, I was too mean. Your pal, Crosshair” :) Hunter: *walks out and shreds the card*

Hunter: Get up here. That’s an order! Tech: *salutes* Permission to defy order? Hunter: Permission denied! Tech: Then I deny your denial (sorry)

Echo: *watching Hunter and Wrecker, captured and surrounded by stormtroopers* Well this hardly seems fair Echo: *jumps in a walker and defeats them easily* Told you it wasn't fair

*Phee and Tech kiss* Omega: *eyes being covered by Hunter* awww Wrecker: Finally!

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din-miller · 8 months

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A Little Jive Is Good for You

PAIRING: All Bad Batch Boys x AFAB Reader (gender neutral) no incest/all separate stories

Summary: Reader surprises their partner with a new sex toy called Jive. (It's a wearable g-spot vibrator)

WARNINGS: 18+, sex toy, app controlled sex toy because we fancy here, oral (cunnilingus), fingering, semi public sex (?), tiny bit of angst (sorry echo), thigh fucking, I don't know what phones are called in Star Wars so I'm using device as a placeholder for now, afab, gender neutral reader, all established relationships, tbb headcanons but it's spicy

A/N: I originally wasn't going to write for Crosshair but the setting of the fic didn't work with the others so he made the cut. Congratulations buddy.

Hunter doesn't notice the app at first. It's not until half his Caf is gone, the article he's reading is finished and his thumb swipes back to his home screen that his eyes fall upon the newest icon.

We-vibe

He frowns, never having heard of it before. For a brief second he wonders if he should get Tech to come over and look at it. Make sure it's not a virus or some kind of tracker. But his curiosity gets the best of him. It's probably some kind of prank of Wrecker's. He's done it before. So, Hunter takes his chances and opens the app and he's met with a dark purple background and a bold-all-caps word.

TOYS

Definitely Wrecker's doing.

He hits the play button and it takes him to another purple screen, this time a lighter shade. There's four squares that surround a circle and inside that circle there is a smaller one labelled JIVE.

With a little hesitation Hunter presses on the smaller circle that he's able to move around. He plays with it, swinging it around inside the big circle before moving it to the bottom left square right on top of a little wave symbol.

Three things happen at once. A faint pulsing sound comes from the cockpit followed by a gasp and a wave of arousal – your arousal – hits his nose so hard that his cup falls out of his hand and onto the floor, bouncing a few times as warm Caf spills onto the ship's flooring, but his hands are too busy clenching the table to notice.

His nostrils flair, seeking the smell of your arousal, breathing it in deep inside his lungs and his tongue darts out to taste the air. Sweet and faint, yet it sits on the tip of his tongue and his eyes close, picturing the glistening of your wet pussy, the way your walls flutter around the toy – kriff, what he'd do to have his cock buried deep in your tight cunt.

Hunter breathes out your name, a plea and you're appearing before him naked as the day you were born.

"Ner kar'ta," Hunter swallows, eyes unapologetically locked on your sex, "Look at you, so wet, so beautiful."

You're in front of him now, his head perfectly lined up with your dripping cunt and his fingertips gleefully trail up your thigh stopping just where you ache for his touch.

"Hunter, baby, please!" You beg, desperate and unashamed. He must sense your desperation, because his hand lays flat over your mons pubis and his thumb rests on your outer folds. He doesn't part them, just presses lightly against them.

"I can feel the vibrations," He grunts, eyes falling close, "I can feel the anticipation as it rushes through your body, the need for pressure, for movement against your wet pussy. It calls to me, ner kar'ta."

"Kriff, answer it then!" You growl, pushing his chair away from the table and throwing a leg over his thighs to straddle him. You rock yourself against his clothed sex, seeking friction against the throbbing of your own.

"Very demanding for someone who started this," He reminds you, but his arms wrap around your waist, device forgotten as he helps you move against his cock, "Not complaining though."

You snake a hand down between your bodies to change the vibration with the built in button. This one's stronger and your hips jerk up, separating from Hunter but the clones quick to pull you back down onto his lap.

Slowly, teasingly so, he removes the toy and presses it against your clit with the palm of his hand as his fingers coat themselves in your arousal before sliding into your cunt.

It doesn't take you long to reach your orgasm, in fact it slams into you at full force when Hunter presses against your sweat spot with just the right amount of pressure.

Then his own orgasm stains the blacks he's currently wearing, messy and so fucking hot. He rarely cums in his pants – preferring to do it in or on you – so when he does your ego inflates. At least until Hunter pulls another orgasm out of you.

Echo had figured it was Tech's doing too. His brother is always updating his technology, making sure everything works. He even programmed all the apps and keyboard to be one handed accessible.

Everyone except you and him had gone out for the next few hours, leaving the ship empty and comfortably silent. At least it was silent until Echo's curiosity got the best of him and his thumb started flicking the small circle labelled JIVE around.

He doesn't have heightened senses; he can't hear the toy, can't smell your arousal. It's not until you appear at the cargo holds door way, wide eyes locked onto the device in his hand with a desperate 'please' falling from your lips that he knew the app wasn't Tech's doing.

Echo's heard of apps like this. A way to pleasure your partner hands free. He went down the rabbit hole of sex toys when you and him first became sexually active. A fear of not being able to properly please you with only one hand plagued him night and day until you sat him down and reassured him that he satisfies you plenty.

"Please," You plead once again, crossing your leg over the other one seeking friction against your core as you squeeze your thighs shut, "Echo, kriff, I need more."

Echo's eyes flicker down to your body, clad only in panties, then to the screen in his hand. His thumb gives an experimental slide of the JIVE button and you stumble towards him, a wave of arousal soaking your panties, and without missing a beat you sink into his lap. Echo's dress in just his blacks, his cock straining against the fabric of his pants and the first brush of your sex against his is utter bliss.

His scomp snakes around your waist balancing you on his lap as he awkwardly tries to catch the device in his hand as it slides from his grip, his brain a little too distracted by the whispers of vibration against his cock to have proper coordination to hold the device.

A part of you is begging yourself to move and take off your panties, to free Echo's cock and slide your drenched folds over the wide width of his sex, but as much as you love pussy jobs you can't seem to separate yourself from your husband long enough to take them off.

So instead you unapologetically hump against his clothed cock, moaning when he moans at the feeling of the toy's vibration against his length.

Neither of you last long, which in all honesty is never a disappointment, and thankfully the night is still young and the way your husband is looking at you, you know you'll be sore tomorrow.

Wrecker finds out about the toy by feeling it. You've momentarily forgotten you were wearing it until his fingers found the tail end of the toy as his deft fingers slip into your panties.

Your back is to his chest as he brackets you in with his meaty legs, one hand palming your tit as his hips expertly grind against your ass.

You've spent the day teasing him; dirty flirting, a brief risky flash of your tits – his biggest weakness – just to build up to this moment.

"Aw, mesh'la, did you get a new toy without me?" His fingers blindly feel out the new toy, or at least the part not inside you, until he finds a small raised bump near the end of the toy. His finger settles on the button but doesn't press it, awaiting your consent.

He's always been like that, a big man who will wait hand and knees to get the go ahead. Especially when it comes to sexual activities and new toys. You admire that about him, consent being the key to everything he does, but right now? Right now you want him to hold you against his chest until the vibrations shoot through your core and leave you a sobbing mess.

The need makes you beg without embarrassment, "Press it, kriff, don't tease me!"

The moment the toy activates you're letting out a silent scream, eyes rolling into the back of your head, body arching up and away from Wrecker's chest as the vibrations pulse inside your tight cunt, right snug against your g-spot.

His hand firmly squeezes your tit before pinching your perky nipple, his breath hot against your neck as he gently nibbles against the flesh again and again, leaving marks, claiming what's his.

His finger travels down farther until it reaches his target; your dripping cunt. He coats his finger with your juices before gently guiding it inside you, right behind the back of the toy.

Nothing about Wrecker is small, his fingers are meaty, chunky, and he knows it. With one finger he curls it in into the silicon of the toy, pressing it against your most sensitive area. Your hand shoots out to wrap around his wrists, nails leaving red crested shapes in his flesh and it's all you can do to keep the tears building up at bay.

You can't stop the cry that leaves your mouth as your arousal soaks through your panties and drips onto the mattress below you. Kriff, you didn't even last half a minute before cumming. It's the quickest you've ever finished and you probably should be a little ashamed of how fast it was, but Wrecker's chest vibrates with the loudest moan you've ever heard from him;

"Mesh'la, I'm gonna–,"

"Wait," You shakingly push yourself up farther onto his torso until his cock slides through the opening of your thighs, "Fuck my thighs, baby, let me see you cum."

He groans, needing no further instructions before fucking your thighs, fast. His precum acts like natural lubricant as his cock jerks back and forth, hot and heavy between your thighs.

"Squeeze around my cock, mesh'la." Wrecker grunts breathlessly and you press your thighs together tightly. The toy is still vibrating inside you and you reach down to the built-in button to turn it off, overstimulated.

Wrecker's fingers dig into the flesh of your hips as his release paints your thighs, his cock helplessly twitching between the valley of your legs as he cries out your name.

Once you catch your breath, and can lift a finger, you'll show him the app. Show him how to use it. Maker, you can't wait.

Tech knew right away what the app meant for, his codpiece already becoming too restricting before he even opens the app.

He calls out for you, wanting to see your face as it overcomes with pleasure. Pleasure he's giving you, he's responsible for.

The moment you walk into the room and see his lust filled gaze, app open on his device, you're stripping yourself of your clothing, sitting across from him in the co-pilot's chair, legs spread wide to give him a clear view of your pussy.

He doesn't activate the toy right away, instead he's leaning forward in his chair, eye locked onto your cunt. He's studying the part of the toy he's able to see and you roll your eyes fondly before snapping your fingers together.

His eyes shoot up to yours, swallowing at the blatant need that reflects back at him. It's clear that neither of you will be lasting long. Not this time at least.

"I trust you're smart enough to figure out how to work it." You teasingly trail a hand down your body, ghosting over your sex before retreating back up to your chest to play with your breasts.

"Of course," He huffs, adjusting his goggles, "It's a basic design; clearly fashioned by humans with a basic understanding of technology–,"

With a soft chuckle you bring a hand down to hover over the built in power button, "Then you'd know I can control it with a quick press of the button right here. Really, I don't even need you–oh kriff,"

Your hips jerk up, a surprise moan falling from your lips as the toy buzzes to life inside you and your walls clench around the silicon, "Tech!"

"Too much?"

You shake your head, fingers clenching the arms of your chair, "No, it's good, it feels so good."

Tech hums, eyes once again locked onto your pussy and you know he's silently debating with himself on whether or not to take a holo. You're about to tell him to just take one but all that leaves your mouth is a pathetic whine as the vibrations change to a stronger setting.

Tech's out of his chair and on his knees before you, "I want to taste you."

That's basically all the warning you get before your legs are hooked over his shoulders, his tongue darting out to collect your arousal before spreading it over your clit. He flicks the tip of his tongue over your sex before pulling back, "You're so wet for me."

You nod, eyes rolling back as his mouth returns to your sex, "All you for, Tech. It's all for you."

Crosshair knew instantly that the new app was your doing. You're the only one who knows his passcode. He just didn't know what the app was designed for.

He had ignored it at first, letting most of the day go by before managing to corner Tech and demand his brother tell him what the app was. Of course Tech had simply explained everything about it, but when he went to go turn the toy on Crosshair shoved the barrel of his rifle under the clone's chin. Tech was smart enough to make himself scarce.

Now with the knowledge of what the app was designed for, Crosshair was in control with you willingly at his mercy. He lets you continue your faux innocent act, pretending himself that he hasn't noticed the app.

He'll wait for the opportune moment to arrive. He's a patient man, he's not weak like his brothers. We won't wait on hands and knees for you to come to him and you know that.

The moment comes almost five hours later as he volunteers himself and you to do the supply run Echo and Tech were originally signed too. Hunter had given him a questioning look, obviously wondering why he'd willingly offer to do something he'd usually bitch about doing.

Crosshair had just glared back at his brother and Hunter was smart enough to end any further questions there.

"So," You start, eyeing the man beside you as you walk side by side through the market, "Why us? Echo was relieved to be getting some fresh air, you know. You also hate people, crowds and shopping. Have to admit, I'm a little baffled."

He doesn't look at you but his words are sharp, "You're not an idiot, ner kar'ta."

"I've never claimed to be one, I– oh, you, you wouldn't," You come to a halt, pulling Crosshair with you. Your eyes are wide, full of fear and a building of desperate want, "We're in public, Crosshair."

"Best not make a scene then."

It's not an order, nor a demand, it's a challenge.

One you already know you're going to lose.

But then again this is Crosshair, the man you've spent all day unknowingly giving him a raging hard-on. He's pent up, sexually so, and that's your doing and that doesn't go unpunished.

So it doesn't really come as a surprise that when you're about to cum he turns off the device, denying you of the orgasm you're desperate for.

Because when you do cum, you'll be on your knees, mouth wrapped around his cock. Not here, in a crowded marketplace; not when he can't praise you. Not when he can't taste himself on your lips.

–

Sorry about how roughly Tech's ended. I've never been good at writing cunnilingus. Blow jobs on the other hand I'm a master at but that's mostly because I've spent ten years writing gay porn.

#my first tbb fanfic I'm scared as hell #warning 18+ content #my first 18 plus fic posted on here too 😬#the bad batch #the bad batch headcanons #hunter x reader #echo x reader #tech x reader #wrecker x reader #crosshair x reader #tbb echo #tbb crosshair #tbb wrecker #tbb hunter #tbb tech #tbb headcanons #tbb fanfiction #justice joy writes

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