#have i obsessed over smth for a straight year
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merry one year of obsessing over this bastard
#deltarune#utdr#spamton#strawglicks art gallery#never in my life.#have i obsessed over smth for a straight year#this is revolutionary#a turning point in my life#also the bg is almost all my spamton art
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i saw that you're opening requests omfg i love your writing so im taking the opportunity!
neteyam tired and exhausted from his training and goes to seek reader to decompress, finds her then just straight up drops his body to her, nuzzling his nose to her neck and probably mutters smth like, "you're my comfort person" or smth, gets all cuddly and everything. reader is the only person who got to see neteyam like this
they're mutually pining best friends btw
bonus if neteyam didnt notice one of his siblings sitting in front of the reader 😭
im so sorry if this got too long 😭😭 tysm babe
My Comfort Person ||| neteyam x omatikaya!reader
awwww thank you so much! 🥹🫶🏻
masterlist
pairings: neteyam x omatikaya!fem!reader
summary: your best friend neteyam is a bit of a sleep cuddlier
words: 600
warnings/notes: none! pure tooth rotting fluff
After another long ass day filled with nothing but training Neteyam was exhausted. In fact, exhausted was an understatement.
The only thing he wanted to do was to snuggle up and go to sleep. What he really wanted was to snuggle up with you.
His best friend was the only person who could immediately put him at ease. Nothing could top the tranquil feeling of holding you in his arms.
Neteyam trudged through home tree, his mind on autopilot. He was so groggy and exhausted he didn’t even know where he was going.
Your hands carefully worked at the bracelet you were holding. Gently weaving the material so as not to damage it. Stopping midway through you noticed that the beads you were using were very similar to the beads Neteyam was found of.
A blush creeped onto your cheeks as you thought of him. You'd be lying if you said you didn't have feelings for him. But he was your best friend and nothing more.
"Why is your face like that?" Kiri asked unamused.
Eyes widening at being caught you tried to brush her off. "Like what?"
"Just admit that you were day dreaming about my brother so we can get back to our jewelry." She rolled her eyes.
You started to panic as you felt your entire face heat up. It wasn't that obvious, was it?
"I don't know what you're talking about." You nervously chuckled.
"Oh please," Kiri huffed. "The two of you have been pining after each other for years."
"You’re being dramatic. Neteyam doesn't see me that way." You frowned.
Kiri started laughing but quickly stopped when she saw your somber expression. "Wait, are you serious?” She asked.
"Yes Kiri! We're friends. Only friends. Neteyam would never return my feelings." You sighed.
"You must be blind." Kiri laughed. "He has been obsessed with you for years. To the point that it's alarming how much he talks about you."
"Seriously?"
"It's obvious to everyone but the two of you apparently."
Before you could argue with her the flap of your tent opened to reveal Neteyam himself. Kiri smirked giving you a knowing look.
Neteyam groggily made his way over to you. He looked liked he was half asleep, not even noticing Kiri as he passed her.
Neteyam plopped down next to you nuzzling his face into your neck. Inhaling your sweet scent immediately relaxed his tense body.
"What's wrong 'Teyam?" You softly asked while reaching your hand up to caresses his head.
"Tired." He mumbled against your skin. "Needed my comfort person."
Snuggling more into you his head found it's way onto your lap. He was hugging your arm to his chest.
You melted at the sight of him. He looked like a big comfy toddler. Seeing him like this wasn’t unusual. Despite the mighty warrior mask he wore, Neteyam loved physical touch. Whenever the two of you were alone he practically demanded that you cuddled.
But that was always when you were alone. He had never acted this way around anyone else. You were shocked that he was so relaxed with Kiri sitting right there. Usually you were the only one to see this side of him.
“Told you.” Kiri whispered.
Shushing her you waved her out. Neteyam had fallen asleep and the last thing you wanted was to wake him up.
Lovingly you admired his relaxed face as he slept. Gently you brushed his hair out of his face. A soft smile graced his lips as he begun to purr.
“Sleep well my mighty warrior.” You whispered.
Taglist:
@ilovejakesullysdick @fanboyluvr @athenalikethegoddess @loverofallthingsfandom @forasgaard @plzfeedmebread @instabull @ms5m1th @avatarappreciationblog @romimiux @ferrtan @tammitammytime @eternallyvenus @dreamyescapesfromreality @dvxsja @jakesullyfatjuicypeen
#avatar#avatar fanfiction#avatar the way of water#neteyam#avatar imagine#fanfiction#neteyam fanfiction#neteyam imagine#neteyam x reader#becca writes 🌙#neteyam x you#neteyam fluff#neteyam drabble#request
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new years day !
"what do you know about love?" "it can bruise, like a punch.."
synopsis: it's only during the new year that huang renjun learns what love is, and loves comes in the form of a charming, margarita indulging, poetry obsessed man, you. after the clock strikes midnight, you take the once love skeptical man on a journey of discovering feelings, full of polaroids, bottle cleaning, and smudged lipstick. the only real question is, what do you do end up as when new years day is over? is this all going to come to nothing in the end?
pairing: huang renjun x male!reader
genre: modern au, not a uni au they've already graduated from uni 😭, strangers to lovers, they have a fling kinda, new years day..literally, this fic takes place during new years eve and new years day, fluff, light light angst, FAST ASS BURN!!
warnings: swearing, explicit language, sexual jokes, mentions of hookups, implications of sex but no smut, mentions of drinking, mentions of toxic workplace environments, things going from 1 to 100 so soon
word count: 12.6k
notes: one of the strangest pieces of writing i have ever completed.. let me get one thing straight, i 💗 renjun, i miss him and i hope hes doing well and taking care of himself :( this fic took the shortest time to write compared to like orbit of yours or all flights are delayed, literally completed this in less than a week.. thats a new isa record i think 😣 anyway!! i decided to do smth different with this fic, instead of just writing a bunch of scenes the singular scenes alone are all about a good few thousand words long, so it might seem short in terms of scenes cause there are really only eight, but each scene is super long so you'll be praying for it to end!!! is this probably super unrealistic? yes, but it's huang renjun so idc, enjoy :)
AT 11:34 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a spot he didn't want to be. after the many failures he's had on all the previous years on new years eves, he was ready to stay home, with a heavy sweater on, pop a bag of popcorn, and sit down on his couch to rewatch the last season of bridgerton once again. he did not want to go out at all, he was not planning to go out at all. no drinking, no bar dates, no stupid flings that end up with the guy not calling you in the end, just him, alone, at his place, eating a shitload of popcorn and crying as much as possible even if there was nothing to cry about it.
going out and sitting at a bar was not on the list of things he wanted to do this new years eve. it reminds him too much of past flings which didn't really end well.. god all of those guys who acted like they were sooooo into him just to drop him the moment he wanted anything other than sex.
he wants to snap all of their necks right now.
renjun was not preparing to go out today, yeah it's new years eve and shit but he doesn't care, he doesn't want to drink.
but lee donghyuck, fucking lee donghyuck just had to stick his head in and beg for renjun to go out with the rest of them. his coworkers don't really annoy him, he just wishes they would stop nagging him. all huang renjun wanted to do on his new years eve was sit down and spend his day at home, watching stupid shows about love, love he knows he'll never get to experience because all the men he attracts are assholes who'd rather die before committing to anything.
and yeah, maybe renjun is being harsh, but the world has been so harsh on him already, he deserves to be harsh, the world deserves it!
so when donghyuck showed up to his place with the offering of him to go out with the rest of the group, he was quick to decline because he knew it was going to end up the same way it always did. he'd wake up having had yet another drunken one night stand and the guy would become nothing but a memory until the next new year when he did it all over again.
"but why not!? drinking can help you forget about that asshole jin—"
"don't mention his name" renjun scolded earlier that day, a steady glare in his eyes pointed at the younger. he heard the sigh of defeat escape donghyuck's lips, but he doesn't care, he turns back around to finish washing the dishes he'd left in the sink before. "and no, drinking isn't going to solve that problem, it'll make it worse".
"but you can't be alone on new year's eve!"
renjun turned back to the yelling lee, a deadpanned expression on his face. "yes i can, i literally will".
"ugh! you're so boring! jeno help me plead my case here!"
renjun just rolled his eyes, trying his best to ignore the insult from his 'friend'. it wasn't often that they decided to crowd up in his place, but because of the new year coming up, and his lack of interest in doing their little new years tradition, they all banded together to try and convince him to go out and drink.
"maybe going out will help you forget about your mess of an ex boyfriend".
"it never helps".
"maybe you should stop trying to get into some guys pants every time, then" jaemin judged out loud, and the older snapped his head towards him to glare once again, offended by that idea. "what? don't look at me like that, it's true!"
"it is not! you're acting like i'm some sort of sex obsessed freak!"
"well only on new years—"
"i have a knife here, do you want me to kill your right now?" he threatened, pointing the knife littered with soap at donghyuck, who shrieked and quickly hid behind jeno. he scoffed, dropping the sharp blade into the sink and drying off his hands. "i'm not going out drinking with you guys".
"so what? you're just going to sit around and do nothing?"
"that is the plan" the huang clicked his tongue, and a groan sounded from the rest of his same aged friends, which just resulted in him snickering at their misery. "whine all you want, i don't care".
"come on, renjunie!" jaemin quickly stood up and wrapped his arms around the older, a pout on his face as he stared at him, practically pleading through his eyes. "please! we won't do anything stupid we swear!" he cupped the older's face, squishing his cheeks between his hands.
renjun simply allowed for the action to happen, because jaemin would've continued to whine like a baby if he tried to push him anyway. "it's just today! you don't even have to drink, you can just sit around with us! pleaaseeeeeee?"
"okay okay get off" renjun pushed the younger away from him, lightly caressing his jaw as he tried to recover from his vice grip. "fine, i'll go out if it stops you all from being so annoying".
the gasp from donghyuck and his subsequent yell in victory made renjun roll his eyes again as he quickly dismissed his friends with a waving hand. "stop yelling or i'll change my mind".
jeno quickly nudged donghyuck, who stopped his yelling and just gave a blinding smile. "we'll see you later then, renjunie! chenle will text you the address!"
renjun was not looking forward to this outing they had planned.
so here he is, december 31st, 11:34 pm, sat at a bar as his friends all get up to their own things. when he first did arrive, he thought he'd only be there for a good hour and a half before leaving, but no, it's almost twenty minutes away from midnight and he's still here, sat at the bar, without a drink anywhere near him.
at this point, he's about to order a drink just to make himself less bored.
"excuse me?" he calls out, catching the attention of the bartender in front of him. he gives a small smile, lightly straightening up his seat and sighing. "hi, can i have a kir royale?"
the bartender raises an eyebrow, blinking at the stranger in front of him. "just that?"
"just that" he confirms, smiling when he earns a nod from the stranger before him. "thank you".
"kir royale? you have questionable taste.."
renjun startles when he hears the sound of an unfamiliar voice, while he would've been annoyed if it was one of his friends who decided to keep him company after abandoning him to go on and do stuff with other people, he probably would've preferred them instead of.. well, you.
and that's not in an insulting way, you just make everything so complicated for renjun.
"questionable?" renjun raises an eyebrow, just a little irritated by the words from this stranger who had seemingly come out of nowhere. you blink, snickering lightly as you settle down beside him, you already have a drink of your own, but renjun can't currently focus on that. "what is that supposed to mean?"
"just didn't think it would be someone's first choice.." you mutter, fingers toying with the glass of your cup. "but i can't judge anyone for they're drink choices, i can't really judge anyone for anything" you giggle to yourself, and renjun catches your smile, a smile he decides is pretty.
renjun allows for a small laugh to escape his own lips, probably the first time he ever laughed that night, it wouldn't be the last time, though. "i just want something to drink, at this point, it doesn't matter if it tastes good or bad anymore, my year has been insanely shitty".
"oh? trying to erase the mistakes of the previous twelve months with drinking?"
"you could say that" renjun replies, smiling softly at you then turning back to the bartender in front of him, he let out another small 'thank you' and slid the drink over to him smoothly. "i just don't want to drink too much" he says, beginning to dig through his wallet to pay for this little drink.
"scared of the hangover?"
"not the hangover, just scared of saying something i'll regret" he chuckles again, finally finding his card and paying for his drink. he again smiles at the bartender and places his card back in his wallet, merely glancing at you.
"hm" you respond, taking another sip of your drink. "that's understandable".
"yeah.." he mumbles, immediately looking away from you as he feels his face redden stupidly quickly. what is he even blushing for? he just met you, there is no reason you should be flustering him, you didn't even do anything. "what's your name?" he's quick to ask, and you hum again as a response, picking at your nails.
"y/n".
renjun finally looks at you as you say your name, you aren't looking at him, checking the time on your phone. he looks you up down, examining everything about you, your clothes are nice, the jewelry your wearing is nice, your hair is nice, everything about you is nice.
your lips are especially nice, he would describe them as beautiful even.
but renjun should not be staring at your lips, or even be thinking about them, he didn't agree to go out just to hook up with another guy, he is not going to do that, it'd be idiotic for him to. yeah you're pretty, very pretty, but renjun isn't going to allow for this conversation to escalate into something.. else, he's not going to surrender his pride because of a pretty guy he met at a bar.
"and you?"
renjun's face only burns more when he realizes he's been silent all this time, just marking each of your features in his head, he probably looked so stupid, just staring at you speechless. "oh! me? me! yeah uh— renjun".
"renjun" you snap your fingers as you say his name. "ren-jun, pretty, i like it".
"pretty?"
"yeah, a pretty name for a pretty guy".
renjun immediately wants to rebut with a snappy response, but he gets much more flustered than he wants to admit, because he instead begins trying to sputter out a response with his face now reddening excessively. "i— flirting with me on new year's eve, really?"
"not flirting, just telling you what i observed".
"so you think i'm pretty?"
"i'd be lying if i said i didn't" you reply smoothly, a grin tugging at your lips as you take another sip of your almost finished drink. "is it such a surprise that i think so?"
"well.. no, but it's just, i don't know, i don't want to do something i'll regret".
you raise an eyebrow, clearly puzzled by the seemingly cryptic words. "what does that mean?"
renjun lets out a small sigh, he can't believe he's going to say this, especially to you, a pretty stranger he met at a bar on new year's eve. "i can't start a new thing with another guy on new year's eve because it never ends up well, i should've learned my lesson by now".
you blink, staring at renjun for much longer than he thinks he could ever handle. you're silent for a while, processing his words and tilting your head to the side to get a better look at him. "ah, so all of your new year's eve hookups end terribly?"
"not just my new year's eve hookups, all of my attempts at love have ended terribly, can't believe love is advertised as something so desirable but every single time i try, i fail!"
"that has to do more with the people you entangle yourself with, not love itself".
"love is stupid" renjun's teeth drag against each other as he says those words, harsh words, yes, but he deserves to be harsh, the world deserves his wrath because the only thing that's ever been given to him is heartbreak after heartbreak after heartbreak! you let out a small chuckle at the sight of his gritted teeth, the words amuse you.
"is it? or have you just had horrible experiences with it?"
"okay mr love expert" renjun is quick to rebut, and the statement is enough to get yet another laugh out of you. "what do you know about love?"
you pause for a moment as you think about the words he suddenly spits, the question makes you smile, that pretty smile that renjun loves so much, he wants to punch you in the face for being so pretty.
"it can bruise, like a punch.." your quick to answer, fiddling with your shirt collar. "but it's not all bad, love can be beautiful, entrancing, when you do find someone who really loves you, it can be a magical experience, a whirlwind of joy you never knew you could feel for another human being".
"are you into all that poetic bullshit?"
"i guess you could say that".
renjun giggles, a small shake of his head accompanying the sound which escapes his lips. he won't lie, you're very funny, hilarious even. at least he has you as company on this terrible new year's eve, even with your stupid talks of love, he enjoys having you around. "are you going to try to redeem love for me?"
the words are much more flirtatious than he intends for them to be, but it seems you don't notice, because you just smile at his words. "i can't change something you don't want me to, i can only inform you on how i feel about the topic".
renjun opens his mouth to say something in return, but he doesn't really know how to respond to that. god, how have you managed to leave him so speechless even though this is your first encounter? he's about to collapse onto the floor with how surprised he is.
but somehow, renjun stands his ground, literally. "your pretty well spoken for someone so.. you".
"someone so me?"
"yeah" renjun clears his throat. "you remind me of a friend of mine, you probably have so many people falling at your feet without you even having to do anything".
"you make me sound much more interesting than i actually am" you finally finish your drink, your cheeks are dusted red, and you fiddle with the glass in your hands, tracing each of the cuts carved into it. renjun has no idea why he focuses on your hands, but he does, he intently watches as your fingers move skillfully, and his ears begin burning at just the fact that he's staring at your fingers.
oh you've hit a whole new low, huang renjun.
"so you're not some cool playboy who has seven boyfriends?"
"do i strike you as a whore?"
that made renjun laugh even harder, and he had to cover his mouth with his hand. "you're so.. abrupt".
"i like to think that's one of my best traits" you respond, clasping your hands together before focusing your full attention on renjun, attention which immediately makes all of renjun's senses heighten. "so, any interesting new year's resolutions?"
renjun groans at the question, playfully rolling his eyes. "i have to stop making mistakes when it comes to the men i choose to love".
you hum, finger beginning to circle around a small spot atop the counter. renjun has to use pretty much all of his inner power to prevent his eyes from falling down towards your fingers and staring at them. he really has no idea why he's resisting these very needy urges, he doesn't want to seem easy to you, he doesn't want to seem easy to anyone.
but there's something about you, something that makes him want to stay instead of leave, this is something different, not like the other encounters he's had with cute guys at bars on new year's eve. "and what about you? what is your resolution?"
"probably to quit my shitty job".
renjun snorts, finding the statement amusing. "that's a good one, much better than mine".
"i would disagree, yours seems full of much more ambition".
"well i do pride myself on my ambitious spirit" renjun hums, unabashedly checking you out right in front of you, maybe it's the one drink getting to his head, but he's no longer ashamed anymore, he's doing it in broad daylight. "i think you're pretty too".
renjun has no idea where those words came from, but they definitely have an impact, because a small red hue settles on your cheeks, and renjun smiles in victory, he flustered you, he's so proud of himself for that. "oh really? you think i'm pretty, renjun?"
you lean closer to him as you say those words, allowing for your breath to fan against his face, and getting a close up few of his striking features. your eyes cast down towards his lips, but you quickly look back up to make eye contact, not wanting to distract yourself.
renjun, on the other hand, finds himself frozen in place. you're close, you're so close, and renjun can see each of the pores on your face. he can't move, so he doesn't move, he allows for his eyes to drag around your face and mark each of your very features.
"yeah" he responds, voice frail and barely above a whisper. "arguably the prettiest guy i've ever met at a bar on new year's eve" his response gets a small smile out of you, and you click your tongue as you merely glance away.
"rich of you to say, you're probably the prettiest guy i've ever met point blank".
"don't try to one up me".
you raise an eyebrow, that annoying smile still on your lips. "i just did".
renjun just bites his bottom lip, he can't help but stare directly at yours.
he is unashamed.
AT 11:57 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN an unfamiliar spot, but a familiar situation. his hands tangled in your hair, your fingers caressing his waist under his shirt, nothing against your back but the steel of your sink and the feeling of his lips on yours, renjun found himself amused by his current circumstances. what did he say again earlier? right, he wasn't going out to end up in the same place he always did on new year's eve, but here is, history truly has a way of repeating itself. renjun doesn't care if he comes off as desperate, it felt horrible trying to contain himself out there, he can't believe he actually did end up surrendering his pride to you, the pretty guy he met at a bar.
well, that's not exactly it.
having the sudden need for air, you pull away, chuckling at the way renjun doesn't really move away from you, his fingers in your hair settle for a moment, and they begin gently running through it, as if he's trying to coax you into a slumber or something. "is this how you spend your new year's eve? making out with a guy in a bar bathroom?"
renjun scoffs, registering your red face, he wants to laugh, but his is probably not better off, so he stops himself. "did you want to make out outside?"
"i think you wanted to make out outside, did you think you were slick?"
renjun frowns, it's not a serious frown, it's a playful one, and shoves your shoulder lightly. "i should've never kissed you.."
"aww" you pout, over exaggerating your expression to amuse the man in front of you. it seems to work, because renjun snorts at the way you're looking at him. he simply tightens his hold in your hair and pulls you closer to press your lips against his once more, making you squeak lightly in surprise.
"you're so annoying.." he whispers against your lips, he wants to act on his hearts desire, but instead refrains from kissing you once again, though your lips do look tempting, he already did it enough in the span of a few minutes. "you're lucky your cute".
"thank you" you hum happily, a pretty grin tugging on your lips as you stare at him. "you're cuter, though".
that results in a tch from renjun. "corny".
"cornier".
renjun snickers, preparing a new rebuttal as he continues running his fingers through your hair. you decide you like the feeling, so you don't tell him to let go of your hair, just allow for his fingers to relax and cart through your it. "can't believe i ended up here with you.." he mutters under his breath, and you simply smile as you pretend you didn't hear that.
unconsciously, your fingers again disappear under his shirt to caress his waist. renjun settles into the touch, your full hand isn't exactly wrapped around his waist, but you still manage to cover most of it, even if what your doing is just feeling his skin with the touch of your cold fingers. "where else would you want to be, right now?"
"at home, in my bed, under a mountain of blankets".
you tilt your head, staring at him. you find it funny how casual everything between the two of you seems after having a nonstop make out session where he quite literally pressed you against the sink, his duality is simply admirable. "i can't say that doesn't seem completely alluring right now".
renjun lets a smile come to his face, but a whole new realization suddenly dawns on him. it is new year's eve, the countdown should be starting soon. "what time is it?" he asks you, words rushed and simply spat out in a moment of clear confusion.
you glance down at your watch, narrowing your eyes at the numbers presented on the miniature clock. "a minute till midnight, not sure about how many seconds are left though".
renjun opens his mouth to ask another question, but is quickly cut off by the sound of someone outside shouting about the ten second countdown to new year's day. he looks at you again, and a smile comes to your face. "guess we won't be counting down with the crowd".
you now fully wrap your arms around his waist, easily pulling him closer to you as you hear the crowd of people outside begin counting down. ten, nine, eight; "don't you find this fun, though? spending new year's with a pretty bar boy?"
then seven, then six, renjun can't really focus properly on anything. "eh, it could be better".
he drops his hand from your hair and starts down with his index finger, stopping at your shirt collar that he quickly begins to fiddle with. five; the numbers are practically burning into his head at this point.
you seem to notice him thinking, and you nudge him, squeezing his waist gently. "hey" you call out, a small whisper, you remove one of your hands from his waist to lift his chin with your index finger, making eye contact with you. "don't think so much, just be in the moment".
four, three, two.
renjun allows for a sigh to escape his lips, trying his best to push all of his anxieties away as he looks up at you. he, again, tilts his head and leans closer to you. just at the last shout of one, he barely whispers it, seemingly just a lingering breath on your lips. "happy new year".
and again, renjun initiates the kiss between you two. if anyone saw him right now, they'd think he was dying with how urgent he seemed. it was like he'd die if you didn't put your lips on his, kissing you like a man on death row. he kept himself pressed against you, as if the idea of not feeling every single part of you was unfathomable.
you weren't much better off, though not the one initiating the kiss, you slowly take over the control, transforming it into less of a heated moment and more of a soft one, nothing but a few press of the lips, less rushed and more thought out. your fingers continue to caress his waist, ignoring the growing butterflies in your stomach.
surely this can't be anything serious, this is just a random guy your making out with in a bar bathroom on new year's eve. why would it ever be serious?
you refrain yourself from thinking too much about it.
when renjun finally pulls away, catching his breath in the process, his eyes immediately look down onto the floor, avoiding eye contact with you like you would turn him into stone if he even looked you in the eye. "sorry, i.. i don't know why i did all that".
you chuckle lightly, just smiling at him. "it's fine, i mean— you do know how to handle things your passionate about".
renjun laughs at the joke, still not looking at you. you want to take his jaw in your hands and move him to look at you, to make eye contact with you, but you stop yourself from doing that, the last thing you want to do is make him uncomfortable because you want him to look at you. "happy new year, renjun".
the soft spoken statement makes renjun finally turn to look at you. he has no idea why, but his face heats up upon seeing the small smile painted on your features, your smile is very pretty, he can't stress that enough today.
he doesn't stop himself from moving up his hand and touching your cheek, beginning to caress your soft skin with his thumb. this is strangely intimate, much more intimate than he usually gets with guys he meets at bars on new year's eve, what's with you that's so different? what is it about you that has his stomach flipping in strange ways?
"happy new year, y/n" he finally answers, sharing the same soft smile with you that you shared with him. it's a strange moment, the air isn't thick, it's not suffocating you two, everything feels..just right.
his lipstick has probably gone to shit by now, all smudged and messed up, he can see the marks on your neck, marks that make his stomach squirm in ways he can't explain. he doesn't really know if he wants all of this to end right now, and as his eyes zero in on your lips again, he blurts one of the first things he can think of.
"i don't— i mean.. come home with me?"
the question makes you blink, and even renjun seems confused by the words. why did i ask that? why the fuck did i ask that? he's literally about to die from the second hand embarrassment he feels.
"are you sure you want that?"
"we don't have to do anything!" he immediately shouts defensively, face so red he might collapse from the excessive heat of his cheeks. "we could just talk and stuff, i don't know, i just want your company i guess.."
renjun doesn't look at you as he mutters those words, again way too embarrassed to look you in the eye. how did you even manage to get him like this? he doesn't think he's ever been this flustered by a guy he just met ever.
it's so embarrassing.
"well i can't disagree with such an offer, can i?"
renjun attempts his best unbothered scoff, but he is already so bothered by you, if his red face is anything to go by. "shut up before i change my mind".
and all you do is chuckle.
AT 12:10 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF ON a walk down the sidewalk with his hands laced together with yours. the streets are much more crowded on this day, and at this time, that's a rare sight. he can see all the people giggling, drunkenly making their way across the streets and down the sidewalks, friends helping other friends support themselves, girls walking while carrying their heels because their feet have begun to cramp, strangers giggling and going on with their lives. renjun allows for himself to observe everyone doing their own thing, stars in the sky shining brightly above him, but even with his focus on the other people around, his attention quickly floats back to you, and he notices that you're too lost in your own world of observation.
though he asked you to come home with him, renjun didn't really think the whole thing through, it was a weirdly impulsive decision that he would usually always overthink before making, but with you.. you just have this unsaid affect on renjun he can't explain, you have this ability to turn his brain into mush.
of course, he couldn't just go home with you without telling his friends he was going home. donghyuck was already passed out by that point, so renjun was spared from his teasing, but that didn't mean jaemin and chenle went easy on him, with their raising eyebrows and tormenting tones of voice.
you charmed those two immediately, impressing them by doing literally anything. they both exchanged enticed glances as they sent renjun a few frivolous looks, looks that he chose to respond with glares as he tried to ignore his quickly reddening face. jaemin made sure to take extra time shaking your hand (a handshake which renjun laser focused on), even squeezing it for extra measure.
so renjun was sort of right, you do easily have people falling at your feet.
renjun pretended to not notice the way you clearly enchanted the two, and he also pretended not to notice the snicker you let out as he quickly dragged you away from his friends, midway through one of his jaemin's pick up lines.
no he wasn't jealous, and even if he was, he was not going to admit that to anyone, not even to any of his friends (the little 'lucky' text he got from chenle was funny, though, he'd admit that).
"the stars are beautiful tonight".
renjun snaps out of his whirlwind of thoughts as he hears the small mutter from you. the two of you are still holding hands, when did you even begin holding hands? renjun has no idea, but for some reasons, it feels right, like your fingers slip together so perfectly, just your hand in his is the perfect feeling, like it was the missing piece of a puzzle.
you're staring up at the sky, eyes practically lit up in interest as you stared at the luminous balls of gas in the night sky. renjun lets out a small laugh at how engrossed you are in the stars shining in the sky, and you notice that small laugh, because you finally stop your stargazing to look over at renjun. "what's so funny?"
"you just look so into the stars" he replies, a small smile coming to his face as he looks into your eyes. "your fascination is admirable" he whispers, saying the words in a low voice like it's a secret he wants to keep only between you two.
you blink, staring at renjun as if you were in love with him or something, a look that makes him feel much more giddy than he'd like to admit. then, though you're clearly flustered, you clear your throat and try your best to not make your red face obvious. "really? i think my interest in stars is nerdy".
"nerdy?"
"that's what everyone else says".
renjun lets his face fall in just the slightest, the words upsetting him lightly. still, he doesn't say anything about it, instead answering something else you mentioned. "your interest in stars is cute, i like seeing people so passionate about things".
you raise an eyebrow, only focusing on one specific word in that sentence. "cute?"
"it was the first word to come to mind".
"hm" you swing your hands back and forth, scooting closer to renjun as you do so.
you're close, you're so close, renjun is unsure of how he's even able to continue breathing with the way your shoulders brush against each other, he squeezes your laced hands, trying to brush off any other thoughts he might be having at the moment. "is stargazing a hobby of yours?"
"it's only really a hobby i do on certain nights, nights when i know certain constellations can be soon, or a shooting star is happening".
"ah" renjun loves that response much more than he can express with words. "you always talk about your hobbies as if you're in love with them".
"well it's just how i get when i'm very into something, i can't really just express things normally when it comes to shit like that".
renjun lets out a laugh at the words, catching view of his tall apartment building and tightening his grip on your hand, making you squeak in surprise as he jolts you forward with a hard tug of your hand. you could easily overpower him, make his life harder by refusing to be dragged, but you allow him to drag you forward towards the doors of his building.
"jeez, don't yank my arm off, huang" you chastise playfully, using his surname to aggravate him, but he only shoots a small glare at you. "what's the rush?" you inquire, frowning lightly as his hand slips from yours, you settle beside him in the elevator, watching him as he presses the five button with his finger.
"there is no rush" he lies, a clear, bold faced lie. he does nothing but smile at you, anxiously swaying back and forth as he stares at the elevator going up one by one. "don't give me that look".
you chuckle at his sudden scolding. "what look?"
"the look where you start reading my inner most thoughts" renjun states, as if he was sure of the kind of look you were giving him. when he sees the puzzled look in your eyes, he sighs. "it's a look i've gotten from many of my friends, feels like you're seeing through my head and know what i'm thinking".
you smile at his explanation, finding the words to be humorous. "well you do think so expressively, i feel like i can hear your thoughts running".
"should i be worried about how you described that?"
"definitely not, what are you thinking so hard about?"
renjun pauses at the question, the dinging of the elevator at floor two, doors opening to welcome in two drunk college students, two drunk college students who press the floor eight button and move to a corner of the elevator to keep themselves wrapped in each other's arms. renjun blinks at the sight of them, unconsciously moving closer to you, bumping into you in the process.
you move your hand down to intertwine your fingers with his, an action that renjun questions, but doesn't rebel against. the students are much too interested in their own conversation to care about you two, so you nudge renjun, who finally looks back at you. "answer my question, what were you thinking so hard about?"
the volume of your voice is much lower, you probably don't want to disturb the also muttering students in the elevator, but it's also because you don't want to expose renjun's answer to these two strangers he probably doesn't want to share his thoughts with. "it's a secret" he responds with a small whisper, leaning closer to you as says those words, the words a whisper against your ear.
his sudden closeness is enough to fluster you.
seemingly glad that he caused your newly reddened face, renjun leans away from your ear and smiles happily, swinging your laced hands back and forth. if you think about it, the two of you kind of look like a couple, the thought is enough to amuse you, because you really just are strangers who enjoy kissing each other, you didn't even know each other two hours ago, and now he's bringing you home with him.
if this is the story you think it is, the ending seems pretty clear.
it seems that the time flies by, because you look up at the counting numbers and the elevator dings, floor five. you barely have time to react before renjun's grip on your hand tightens, and he drags you by your hand once again, this time out of the elevator and towards his unit.
you swear you hear those drunk college kids giggle at the sight of you two.
"this place is nice" you comment absentmindedly, reading off each of the numbers placed on each of the other doors. "better than anything i could afford on my own, what do you do for work?"
"i work for a graphic design company".
"what's your position? do you run the place or something?"
renjun snickers at your surprise, finally stopping the two of you in front of a door which reads the number 'fifteen'. he begins digging through his pocket for his house key, though acknowledging your question as he does so. "i'm just good at my job i guess.. pay has always been good for me".
after finding his key, renjun attempts to open the door, but he struggles a few times to put his key in the key slot, an annoyed groan escaping his lips as he turns his key over again.
you chuckle at his little battle, catching his scrunched nose and furrowed eyebrows. "need some help there?"
renjun sends you a quick glare. "haha, very funny" he says, looking back to his front door and finally, after what seemed like forever, he unlocked the door of his home, gesturing with his head for you to come in.
you blink at him, but as you watch him step forward, you also step forward, letting yourself into his space. you pause as you begin looking around the expanse of an area. it's a nice place, yeah it lives up to the pristine outside of the apartment building, save for a few empty bottles littering the floor. the place is cozy, the air in the room is comforting to you, it isn't thick or anything.
you feel comfortable here.
"you gonna stand there forever?"
you laugh at renjun's inquiry, continuing to look around his complex, picking up on the many art pieces pinned against the wall. "what else am i supposed to do?" you ask back, allowing for renjun's home decor to catch your attention, it's all strangely him, they all describe his personality so well.
"come with me".
"is that an order? or.." you get an answer to that question when you turn to renjun and he stares at you with that pointed look, so you know better than to question his words, and like a lost puppy, you follow behind him to his room.
renjun doesn't say anything more, just takes off his jacket and falls face first onto his bed. you sort of just stand there awkwardly, fidgeting with the zipper on your jacket. renjun turns over, eyes staring up at the ceiling, they then flick over to you, a soft look in them dedicated towards you.
you simply blink at him, chuckling at the display before you. renjun doesn't speak, just gestures you over with his index finger. when you step closer, you simply sigh and sit down on his soft mattress, you were about to fall back and go to sleep yourself, but you stop from doing such things. "what's up with you?"
renjun sighs, and that sigh quickly forms into a soft whine. "i'm so tired y/n" his head rests against his pillow, and his eyes begin drooping shut slowly.
you smile, he's so cute. "then sleep".
renjun seems to want to comply with that, but he thinks about it before answering. "are you still gonna be here when i wake up?"
the question baffles you, it's a question asked with pure exhaustion in his voice, a look in his eye that's so tempting you just want to dive in to kiss him at this very moment, but you stop yourself from acting on such desires, trying to seem not as desperate as you felt. you shrug at the question, which makes renjun frown. "it depends on if you want me here when you wake up".
"if i wake up in the next few hours and i don't see you right there beside me, we are going to have serious issues y/n".
his demanding tone and the serious look in his eye is enough to get another chuckle out of you. renjun then makes himself comfortable, patting the pillow beside his. "lay down with me".
"you're so bossy" you laugh, and renjun is too annoyed to punch your shoulder, so he lets out a tiny irritated grunt in response. you let your jacket fall to the floor, laying your head down onto the soft material of the pillow, almost falling asleep right then and there.
renjun reaches out and begins caressing your cheek with his thumb. again, it's strangely intimate, a satisfying touch against your face which begins to relax you. renjun has no idea why he keeps doing this, but you would tell him if you felt uncomfortable, and you aren't, you like the feeling if you say so yourself.
but just as you were about to doze off, getting coaxed to sleep by the smooth ministrations on your cheek, renjun asks one last question.
"you sure you're still gonna be here when i wake up?"
through your sleepy haze, you nod and let out a tiny chuckle, eyes closing against your own will. "i will, promise".
"promise.." renjun mimics, it's not a question, not a statement or anything, he just whispers the word into the air, continuing to stroke your cheek as he stares at you, slowly slipping into a deep sleep.
sleep quickly takes him away as well, but not before he smiles at the sight of your tired face.
AT 8:03 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN the same spot he fell asleep, which he very much expected. he only rubs his eyes in the slightest, they take a little too long to adjust to the light permeating through the window, though only a small crack of sunlight, it's enough to make his eyes close once again, taking a few more eye openings for them to adjust to the sight of his surrounding room. when they finally to adjust, he's quick to glance over at the spot beside him, and he smiles as he sees you in the same place he left you. you had kept your promise of still being there when he woke up, and though renjun would probably call himself stupid for this on most days, he stops and stares. he keeps his head laid back comfortably onto his pillow and watches you sleep.
that sounds pretty creepy in hindsight, but at the current moment, renjun feels like he has to stare at your snoring figure. your face is half turned into the pillow your laying on, your cheeks dusted red as they press into the soft fabric of the pillow. he giggles softly as he watches your chest rise and fall, the only sound he can hear being the inhales your taking in and the exhales your letting out.
ah, so you're not a snorer, renjun finds the fact to be surprising. it's not that he expected you to have monster snoring habits or something, but he expected at least some sort of loud noises from you while you slept, but no, you sleep so gently.
you sleep like a baby, and you also look like one in the dimly lit room. sun shining on your face, highlighting your features, your pink lips parted as you let out short breaths, your cheeks a rosy red, he can't help but smile at the sight of you sleeping in front of him.
you look so cute, so serene, renjun wants to pinch your cheek and never let go.
but then he's struck with the realization that he has to wake up, a realization that makes him frown as he lets out a small groan.
the sound emanating from his lips seems to be loud enough that you startle out of your slumber, shifting slightly against the mattress. renjun almost jumps back in surprise when he sees you shift again, rubbing your eyes and letting out a small groan. renjun doesn't take his eyes off you, though, just watches you stretch awake, then close your eyes once again.
after what seems like forever, your eyes open and you blink a few times at the male in front of you. when you stop blinking, you smile at him, as he makes no effort to even try to look away from you. "hi" you greet, taking a deep breath as you sigh against the material of the pillow under your head.
"hi" renjun greets back, unable to resist his giggle as he stares at your tired morning face.
you try your best to tilt your head, humming at his greeting. "were you watching me?" you ask immediately, trying your best to tease him even with the rasp of your voice.
"yeah".
"you creep".
renjun does nothing to confirm or deny the claim, simply hums and gently flicks your forehead, making you let out a wince of pain, a wince he's sure you're faking. "you sleep like a baby".
you furrow your eyebrows, seemingly confused by that statement. "what is that supposed to mean?"
"you sleep so peacefully, like you have no responsibilities in life".
the statement makes you snicker, and you turn more into the pillow to hide your quickly reddening face. renjun giggles again, fulfilling his desire of pinching your cheek, an act of affection that you quickly flinch away from, clearly flustered but instead feigning annoyance.
"that's a stupid way to describe it".
"was just describing what i saw".
"okay then responsible adult, go get up and do responsible adult things".
renjun rolls his eyes, shoving your shoulder and rising from his comfortable blanket, stretching his arms above his head. he slaps your thigh, eliciting a small yelp from you. "come on, let's go".
you seem puzzled by that order. "let's go where?"
"to the bathroom, we have to go brush our teeth".
"we?"
"yes we, get up i have an extra toothbrush for you".
so, again like a lost puppy, you rise from your place on renjun's bed and follow behind him to the bathroom.
you find it laughable how easily you fall under his control.
"do you enjoy ordering me around?"
"i think you enjoy being ordered around" renjun is quick to accuse, an accusation that you just chuckle at, which is all he needs as confirmation. he gets into a familiar spot in front of his mirror, picking up his toothbrush and turning on the sink. "you never question my orders, you always follow me around, do you like that in guys?"
you laugh at the words, clearly amused but clearly not offended. he picks up an extra toothbrush and hands it over to you, having to resist the urge to smile at the sight of your messy hair. "you could say something like that".
renjun scoffs softly. "you're gross" he comments, rolling his eyes as he begins brushing his teeth, staring at you through the reflection of the mirror. renjun focuses less on brushing his teeth and more on how pretty you look, even having just rolled out of bed and hair pretty much messed out of proportion, you still look so beautiful in his eye.
you notice his eyes on you, and seeing as he's currently brushing his teeth, you decide to take your chance. "if you like how i look that much you can just say so".
renjun almost bites down on his toothbrush upon hearing the words. clever asshole, he says in his head, irritated by how you took that opportunity to make a witty comment.
you grin in victory, beginning to brush your teeth just as renjun spits out the toothpaste formerly in his mouth. "you think you're sooo smooth, huh?"
he's annoyed, most definitely flustered, though, if his red cheeks are any indicator, but he's not going to give the satisfaction of flustering him (even though you definitely did). you nod at his question, proud of your flirty little comment.
"you're so annoying".
"and cute right?"
the two of you make eye contact through the mirror reflection again, and you use that opportunity to wink at him while he has his eyes on you, only making renjun scrunch his nose again.
"you're not cute".
"i think you'd disagree, seeing as how you were literally devouring me back in that bathroom".
renjun sends you a glare, immediately flipping you off as he sees you wink again in the reflection of the mirror.
"at least be nice to me".
renjun rolls his eyes so much that he's sure they're going to get stuck in the same spot.
oh you're so good at annoying him.
AT 10:48 AM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a spot he'd rather not be in. he lets na jaemin get away with things way too often, because there are way too many bottles on the floor and at least half of them were drank by him. still, he can't just leave the mess on the floor, it's not like it'll clean itself up. after eating breakfast, and making sure to insult your favorite cereals, renjun stared at the hefty bottle mess on the floor for what seemed like years. he then rolled his eyes and let out a groan knowing he had to clean it all up. he can't really make an excuse now, so, he starts his picking up the empty bottles off the floor, cursing in his head as he finds himself starting to get annoyed once again.
"renjun! do you see this?"
oh right, you're still here. renjun pauses to look over at you, and he lightly chuckles at what he sees. your standing there (in one of his sweaters by the way holy shit) with a polaroid camera in your hands. it's a camera renjun recognizes, he used to love that thing when he first got it, but he forgot about it after a while. "where'd you find that?"
"in your room".
renjun raises an eyebrow, a grin tugging at his lips. "were you going through my stuff?"
you look baffled by the question, and you quickly stutter through your response. "no! no! i wasn't i was just looking for a sweater because you told me to and i found it in your closet!"
renjun finds it easy to laugh at your display, and the frown on your face is so cute he has to resist the urge to kiss you right then and there. "okay then, what's so interesting about it?"
"well nothing in particular i just really like polaroid cameras!"
you're so.. cute? adorable? precious? all of those adjectives describe you perfectly. you're always so giddy about the things your into, even the hobbies most people would consider "boring" you talk about with such interest, renjun has no idea why he notices you this way, it's never been like this with most of his new years flings. yeah most of them have made it to his home, but it's simply something about you, you make renjun feel a sort of way he never thought he'd feel for a guy he met at a bar on new years eve.
you don't feel like just a fling, you feel like more than that, you sort of feel like home in a way. he would love to go out with you sometime, even if the new years eve bathroom makeout session never happened, he thinks a date with you would be perfect, he can already envision it now.
but wait, why is he doing that? why is he standing here, staring at your pretty face, and thinking about dating you? there's no way he feels anything serious for you, right? it's not like he's in love with you, he can't be! you don't fall in love with someone you've only known for a good eleven hours!
he isn't even sure if he knows what love is, but he knows he can't be in love with you.
renjun snaps out of his thoughts when he hears the click of a camera, he immediately turns to over to you, and he frowns as he sees your fingers on the button of the camera. "y/n".
you blink, catching his frown, any playfulness in your tone immediately disappears. "what? did i do something wrong?"
"why'd you take a picture?"
you again seem baffled by the question, because you let out a small snicker. "you looked very pretty in the moment".
"i don't think that's true".
"it is! you're so photogenic are you kidding me!?"
you stare at the polaroid containing the picture of renjun in your hands, smiling softly at what you see. renjun smiles at the words, feeling his cheeks flare up as you gaze down at the polaroid. "you're so corny".
"and you're still cornier".
renjun snickers, but he doesn't say anymore, turning away from you to focus back on picking up the bottles on the floor. you finally look up, placing the polaroid of him on the counter. "you seem very into that".
you hum, stepping closer to him. "i told you! i really like polaroid cameras!" renjun turns back to you, and he almost falls onto the floor realizing how close you are.
you stare down at the camera, playing with the several buttons. "i don't have a polaroid camera back at my place, but i have a point and shoot camera! maybe i can show it to you sometime".
you smile as you say those words, immediately turning around and going to place the camera on the counter, you miss renjun's reaction to your words. what did you mean by sometime? does that mean you're still going to talk after this? does that mean you're planning to take him to your place at least once? he can't help but overthink the words instantly.
but before he can ask you about it, you gasp. "you've been cleaning on your own the whole time!? let me help you!"
and renjun doesn't exactly know when to bring up his many thoughts, so the two of you begin cleaning the bottles together. you make sure to slip out a few more flirty comments in that time, comments that renjun makes sure to combat with steady glares and muttered curses, even with how red his face becomes.
for some reason, this feels.. right. renjun finds cleaning with you to be fun, he's enjoying even the smallest of moments he can share with you.
it sort of feels like you two are dating.
renjun spends way too much of his time staring at you. staring at you pick up bottles from the floor, staring at you ramble about cereal, staring at you take many more polaroids of him, polaroids you stated you'd "cherish forever".
this is strange, it's strange how he feels. it's strange how you make him feel, he doesn't remember the last time he ever felt this way for any guy, for anyone.
so, as renjun watches you wash the dishes, listening to your ramblings, he wonders if this is what love feels like, if this is what you were talking about back at the bar when you first met. you snicker at something you said in one of your random stories, but you stop as you notice renjun zoning out, clearly not paying attention to you.
"what are you thinking about?" you ask, drying off the plate and placing it back in the rack. renjun again snaps out of his daze, immediately breaking eye contact with you as he feels his face burn. "come on! renjunie~"
your wet finger touches his cheek, making him bite his inner cheek. "just.. something".
"you're not going to tell me about this something?"
renjun shakes his head, uncharacteristically silent. "i don't know if i'm ready to tell you about my stupid thoughts".
you get his words, so you don't press on. "alright, if you ever do want to tell me, you know i'm here".
renjun can only really stare at you, it's then that the realization dawns on him. oh god he likes you, he likes you so much that he might die if he doesn't spit it out instantly.
and when he sees you smile again, he has to use every ounce of energy in his body to not collapse onto the floor.
AT 6:17 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF IN a little bit of a crisis, a crisis that's begun all because of you. he feels his palms begin getting sweaty, and he can't stare at you for too long or he'll literally melt from how heated his face is becoming. it's literally january, it should be so cold that he's frozen, but he's burning every time he stares at you. he feels so embarrassed just saying something to you, and you can clearly tell you're getting to him because your smiles slowly begin to turn into smirks, smirks that burn into his brain and make his thoughts turn into mush in an instant. now he can't really tell you about his thoughts, because he's afraid of spilling his true feelings if he does.
renjun doesn't feel like any of this is intentional, you're not stringing him along just so you can break his heart and never contact him again.. at least, he hopes you're not. renjun feels like he's been through this exact process so many times, but none of the previous times have ever transpired like this before. you have to be an alien of some sorts, renjun has never met someone like you.
he hears his inner voice laughing in his mind, making fun of him for falling so easily into your hands. you do this each time, renjun, you say it's going to be different this coming new year and it never is, how long until you stop falling for these guys who don't care?
a pit forms in his stomach at the thought, and renjun finds himself upset much more easily than he thought he'd be.
love is weird, love has always been weird. it's never been easy for renjun to ever get love, either he got backstabbed by someone he thought he was on good terms with, or they would ghost him because they weren't interested but couldn't say it with their own fucking words.
why does he assume it'll be any different with you?
why does he assume that you're probably just as into him as he is you? what if he's reading everything wrong and you're really only here for one thing? what if you're just playing the long game?
renjun feels like he has no idea what's real or what's not. he can't read you and it makes him much more anxious than anything, he doesn't want to think that you're just like everyone else but considering his luck with love on new years, you probably are.
he feels like he's about to throw up.
"are you really going to quit your job?"
renjun asks that question out of desperation, out of the need for a conversation. your eyes flick over to him, and a smile comes to your face as you register the question. you look so pretty, the lighting in the room accentuates your features. "with the way it's going there? yeah".
"aren't you afraid of not being able to find more work..?" he bites his inner cheek, he has no idea why he asks that, he doesn't have control over your actions, you could quit whenever you want to, what difference would his opinion make.
"no, i have backup plans for that".
renjun didn't really expect that as an answer, but it's a good answer nonetheless, because he finds himself smiling at your words. "what's with your job that's shitty? is it the people? is it your coworkers?"
"that place is making me feel like garbage under someone's shoe, can't do anything without being yelled at or cussed out by a higher up because i'm being slow, customers lay their hands on me and i can't even do anything because the customer is always right!"
your frustrated, genuinely, probably the first ever time he's seen you frustrated since the clock struck twelve. just seeing you so frustrated is enough to weird him out, so he quickly tries to change the subject. "i hope you succeed at your resolution, that place sounds like hell".
"it is hell, the moment i can escape the confines of that place i'll be free, but anyway, what are you going to do to make your resolution come true?"
renjun blinks at you, mind suddenly blank. "what?"
you shift in your place on the other side of the couch, focusing all of your attention on renjun, who is struggling not to melt under your stare. "your resolution was to stop making mistakes with people you love or whatever, how are you going to fulfill that?"
renjun pauses, silence enveloping the room, he doesn't exactly know how to answer that, yeah he said his resolution with confidence, but that might've just been the alcohol that was in his system at that moment. how was he supposed to stop making the same mistake over and over again if he was currently doing it right now? he's sitting here with you, the cute guy he met at a bar on new years eve that he couldn't resist, it's a repetitive cycle that will never end.
renjun feels like an idiot, a hypocrite, how did he manage to fail at his whole resolution on new years day? he can't believe how easily he surrendered himself to you.
but when renjun glances up at you, catching your eyes in the process, he almost wants to fall into your arms and never leave them, he wants to wrap his arms around you and never let go.
"i think that resolution will take a while to reach, love is complicated and all.. i really just need time, i guess".
"time?"
renjun is afraid his voice is going to sound too quiet if he speaks. you stare at him with those eyes again, you stare at him as if you're in love with him, and renjun thinks that's crazy, because why would you ever be in love with him? the idea is a stupid one, he should cast it aside.
"yeah time, time is precious.. love takes time, i think this year, i'll be willing to wait for it".
the words strike you in a way you don't expect, and renjun picks up on it, because you pause for a moment and stare at him for a while. you stare for so long that renjun swears he's going to melt under your gaze, you then smile, your smile so pretty that renjun swears he's going to fall to the floor.
"how long are you willing to wait?"
"as long as it takes".
your about to respond again, but renjun quickly stands up, changing the subject. "do you like coffee ice cream?" he immediately asks, glancing at his fridge as he tries his best to pretend he's unaffected by your pretty eyes staring at him like that.
your eyes light up, clearly entertained by the idea of an ice cream party happening. "yeah, i like all ice cream flavors".
renjun snorts, clearly amused by your response. "weirdo".
you furrow your eyebrows, feigning offense at the words. renjun smiles at the perturbed look on your face, walking over to his fridge to go get the ice cream he had mentioned. "your calling me weird? you're so mean to me".
renjun doesn't listen to your complaints, he snickers at your tone of voice. you frown as you hear him laugh, crossing your arms stubbornly and turning away from him when he comes back with pints of ice cream. "are you mad at me?"
you don't respond.
renjun scoffs playfully, sitting down across from you. he blinks at you, watching you resist the urge to smile. "y/n~"
"shut up i'm trying to ignore you".
"you can't ignore me! or no ice cream!"
you gasp at the words, immediately giving him all of your attention. "hey! you can't do that if you offered it to me!"
"i can! and i will!"
"come on huang renjun!"
renjun only giggles as your complaints skyrocket in volume.
AT 11:34 PM, RENJUN FOUND HIMSELF ON top of the world. okay, not literally, but he felt like he was at the very moment. you had stayed for much longer than the both of you intended for you to, you kept saying that you would leave whenever, stop making renjun feel uncomfortable (did you really think you were making him feel that way? oh you have no idea), but he continued to deny your claims, he denied it until 11 o'clock rolled around and he found himself back at the time he started, except it was all different now. renjun is on the rooftop of his apartment building, staring up at the sky and the shining stars that create a line of luminosity across the airspace. the only reason renjun is on the roof right now is because you convinced him.
you managed to convinced him so easily, pleading eyes on display and pout enormous.
"renjun?" you asked as you walked into the kitchen, staring outside the open window at the night sky, lightly shivering at the cold air that hit you. "can i ask for a favor?"
renjun turned to you, running a hand through his hair as he stared at you. he's probably do you a million favors, how hasn't he done you one today?
"yeah, ask away".
you paused for a moment, staring at renjun for a what seemed like forever (in renjun's metrics), a seemingly anxious look in your eyes. "are we allowed to go to the rooftop of the building?"
renjun furrowed his eyebrows, puzzled by the question, why would you be curious about that?
"uh.. why?"
you stayed silent for a while, the longest you've ever gone without talking to renjun this day, that's weird, he's used to you running your mouth all the time. your eyes casted to the side, and renjun narrowed his own, noticing your sudden nervousness.
"i wanna go look at the stars.." you muttered, not looking at renjun as you said those words.
renjun let out a small laugh at the realization of what you wanted, but you seemed to think he was making fun of you, because you looked away again, clearly embarrassed by his laughter. "you know what we don't have to just pretend i never asked that i'll go now—"
"no no no! don't take it that way, i think it's cute, i'll go with you".
renjun likes describing your fascination for stars as 'cute', a fact that you made sure to note as you watched him grab his jacket. "what are you waiting for? come on!"
and what do you do when the huang renjun gives you an order? you obey like a mind controlled robot.
so, you allowed for renjun to take your hand (an action that flustered you much more than it should've) and lead you up to roof of his apartment building, the cold january air doing nothing to deter him from his mission, the mission he wanted to complete because of you.
your fingers are still intertwined when you make it up there, but your now less focused on his warm hands and more on the luminous lights in the night sky. your jacket is unzipped, barely protecting you from the freezing temperature of the outside, but the stars are much more appealing to you.
renjun chuckles lightly, feeling you squeeze his hand as another breeze of cold air rushes past you. "you're so into them y/n" he teases, nudging you with his shoulder.
"they're so pretty" you mutter, your eyes practically sparkling with amazement.
renjun watches you for what seems like forever (in his own metrics), distracted by your face. he admires your pure interest, it makes him smile, a smile that you clearly notice, as he catches your glancing eyes.
you then sigh, shivering lightly from the cold air outside. "renjun, i have a question for you".
your tone is much more serious than he expects it to be, and a pit forms in his stomach almost immediately. "you have to answer it with complete honesty though okay?"
renjun almost can't look you in the eye, and you grab both of his hands, facing him as you begin swinging your laced hands back and forth. renjun nods, almost a little too enthusiastically, but he can't exactly worry about that right now.
"do you like me?"
god of course i do, are you stupid?
but renjun bites his tongue, just chuckling and looking to the side. he squeezes your hands, looking back at you with an indescribable expression. "yes".
you look surprised, which surprises renjun himself. "yes? like actually—"
"y/n i don't know what you think has been transpiring today but— i don't know i really do like you, i'm not sure if it's love yet or whatever but i don't want to just let you go, i don't want for this day to end and for us to go back to being strangers again i.. i want to keep you in my life".
you blink, baffled by the words. your face reddens, you hope you can use the cold as an excuse for that. "really?"
renjun lets out a silent laugh, you're so cute. "yes really, was i not obvious?"
"was i not obvious?"
renjun realizes the irony of the situation, and he giggles again, looking down at the floor. "you're so dumb y/n" he pokes your cheek with his index finger. "but yeah, i'd like to go out with you sometime.. like, on a date".
your about to fall to the floor.
"alright, we can start with that.. dates, no labels, no rushing, we can take time with this".
renjun likes the sound of that, and he communicates that thought to you with another squeeze of your hand, smiling prettily at you. "i can get behind that" he leans closer intentionally. "can i still kiss you though?"
you roll your eyes, he's adorable, you lean forward and press a kiss to his lips, your way of answering his question. "yes, you dummy".
renjun scoffs softly, ignoring how quickly his face is heating up. "you're corny".
"and you're still cornier".
renjun would fight with you on it, but he thinks he'll let you have this win tonight.
RENJUN IS EATING HIS LUNCH WHEN JAEMIN brings it up, he wasn't really listening to his friends converse all this time, distracted by something else, or someone else.. he supposes. his head finally shoots up after a good twenty minutes of him ignoring his friends conversation about if mark could beat jeno in a fight, and he's met with a smug smiling na jaemin, a look he's quick to furrow his eyebrows at. jaemin snickers as he sees renjun's confusion, ready to ask a completely idiotic question. "renjunie? how did you and your little fling turned out?" the question is one jaemin probably should've asked a week ago, but he's asking it now that january is coming to a close? how amusing.
renjun blinks, chuckling immediately at the question. "what do you mean?"
jaemin scowls, slapping his arm lightly. "that cute guy you took home on new years eve! what happened between you two?"
"oh the cute guy?" chenle is quick to inquire as he turns to the older, jaemin nods in response. "yeah him! what was his name again..? y/n?"
"oh right! he was cute! did he let you hit?"
"excuse me?"
"i can't believe i passed out!" donghyuck whines in frustration, earning a small pat on the back from jeno, who was trying his best to stifle his giggles. "i wanted to meet renjun's cute guy" he pouts, sinking into his seat with crossed arms.
"oh he was so cute, hyuck, renjun got lucky with him".
"and funny too! funnier than the asshole from our last new years eve outing!"
renjun simply watches as jaemin and chenle go on to rave about you to donghyuck, who seems impressed even though you aren't even there, he laughs in his head at the fact, you're so charming you don't even have to be present to impress his friends.
"he sounds better than the other guys".
"he is!"
jaemin then turns back to renjun, forgetting about his first mission entirely. "soooo renjunie? how'd it go with your guy? did you sleep with him?"
renjun's face flushes at the question, he is very much embarrassed. he rolls his eyes, face practically on fire. "..yes".
"was he good?"
"don't ask that!"
jaemin yelps at the slap he gets from renjun, pouting as he stares at him. "asshole" he's quick to say, sticking his tongue out at the older, who just rolls his eyes again.
"so what happened after that?"
"what?"
chenle is clearly very invested in this. "did he just leave after that? did you get his number? are you two still in touch?"
"and if you aren't can you give me his socials?"
renjun gives jaemin a side glare, answering the question with almost a minute of silence. he hesitates before saying anything, earning weird looks from his friends. "well.."
"come on! spit it out!"
"don't rush me" renjun grits his teeth, fidgeting with the collar of his shirt as he thinks about you, a small smile coming to his face as he does. "were going on a date later today.."
chenle gasps, jaemin yells, donghyuck slams his hand onto the table, and jeno begins silently clapping. "real shit!?"
"yeah.."
"oh my god!" jaemin squeals, shaking renjun out of pure excitement. "congrats renjunie!"
renjun just lets him at this point, laughing at his energy. "don't get so up, it's not official yet were just going out".
"still! progress is being made!"
renjun can't resist his smile, and he looks down to avoid eye contact with his friends.
"renjun!"
renjun snaps his head towards the voice, seeing the front desk clerk walking up to him with a bouquet of peonies in his hands. "hi, do you need something?"
the clerk smiles, extending the bouquet towards him. "a guy came here and dropped these off, he told me to give them to you".
renjun blinks, slowly taking the bouquet of flowers as he pieces the puzzle together. "thank you" he whispers, staring at the flowers in his hands as his face heats up quickly.
as he examines the bouquet, ignoring the teasing of his friends, he finds a note, a note that he immediately smiles at upon reading.
a little birdie told me these were your favorite flowers? i can see why :) anyway, eat well, i'll see you tonight pretty!!
love, y/n ♡
oh you're so sweet.
jaemin gasps as he reads from the older's shoulder. "i can't believe it! you hit the jackpot with this guy renjunie!" but renjun can't even find it in himself to get mad at jaemin for being nosy, he's too busy trying to not cry at this gesture.
renjun can't believe he has you, he feels so lucky, like the happiest guy in the world.
"why can't i get flowers from a cute guy? when is it my turn?!"
renjun only chuckles at chenle's complaints, much too distracted thinking about you.
#huang renjun#nct#nct dream#renjun nct#nct imagines#nct drabbles#nct scenarios#nct dream imagines#nct dream drabbles#nct dream scenarios#huang renjun imagine#huang renjun x reader#nct x reader#nct dream x reader#huang renjun x male reader#𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!
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hear me out- ghost tying soap's cock cage to reader's crotch rope
WOAH. I don’t even know if this would really work but I’m obsessed with it
Ghost locking the two of you in Johnny’s cage and tying you together so you really can’t get away from him at all. Johnny endlessly humping and whining because he’s sooooo horny and needy :( wants to fuck his pretty girl so bad :( and every time he thrusts he’s pulling against your clit, so he’s not getting any pleasure at all and you’re drowning in endless pleasure, both of you stuck the whole night like that
Simon tying the two of you facing each other, both kneeling with your knees touching and a little bit of space between your torsos (when you’re not leaning on each other for support). He’s got Johnny riding a vibrating dildo or a Sybian or smth like that and you locked in really strict bondage (think spreader bad, posture collar, anal hook, everything held stiff and straight). Johnny’s a horny thing so he’s riding the dildo endlessly, even though he’s unable to get any real pleasure from it, and every movement he makes jerks the rope around your cunt without any way to get off. Simon sits on the couch, has a cigarette while he watches the show. Leaves you both ungagged at first, maybe eventually gags you if you’re begging more than he likes.
Not Johnny with a cock cage but maybe with a humbler? He’s fucking you doggy style with Simon behind him, and every once in a while there’s a harsh yank on his balls that pulls him away from coming and makes him shout in pain. Gets him teary and squirmy and just ruined. You’re probably tied down too - maybe tied bent over the coffee table - and just left to wiggle endlessly in place :(
I don’t have any more ideas right now but this is such a good idea for a double punishment type thing, gonna be thinking about it for like a year. No one be surprised if it shows up in a fic somewhere eventually lol
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hollowhead rant bc i've been obsessing over ava/avm and i cant stop thinking abt the hollowheads
victim is that character i want to beat the shit out of and then hug them until all their pain goes away. omfg victim was completely ripped from any chance at a normal life. he was deleted not even 2 minutes after they were created, and when they get to live, they say "fuck you alan" and create a whole ass company out of spite. and if hollowhead age is 0 years old at creation, that means he was not even 16 when he made rocket corp a thing. all because they couldnt let his deletion go, which honestly, completely fair
chosen. oh, chosen. the universe really said "hey wouldnt it be funny if we made that one guys life a living hell" and threw everything at him. he was thrown into a "survival of the fittest" situation the moment he was created, and alan just used him as an ad blocker like he was nothing but a tool. the first ever true friend he made was created to kill him, and the friendship failed bc neither knew how to fucking communicate. and then hes tortured on his GODDAMN BIRTHDAY. his BIRTHDAY. BY HIS OWN BROTHER. WTF VICTIM?? he dragged second along to help him bc he was desperate to escape the mercs but all he accomplished was getting them both captured. he must be feeling so much guilt rn omfg (to be fair it was a shit move to pull but also i completely understand his decision)
we dont know much abt dark, but it must be difficult being coded to kill your best friend. maybe the code was altered when she took chosens hand, but as far as i can tell all it did was give it powers. so assuming the code stayed, that means that dark had to fight with its own code for however long she and chosen were living together. i know for a fact its exhausting to fight with your own brain, and i cant imagine having to do it for however-many-years straight. i dont know if i want dark to make a comeback in later episodes, but i definitely wanna know more abt her.
second coming is such a fuckin sweetheart. theyve been through sm and they havent deserved any of it. they literally watched rest of the cg get ripped from them FOUR TIMES (alan ending rygb, dark murdering rygb, chosen kidnapping second, parkour episode) like they must have seperation anxiety or smth like that at this point. also claustrophobia like theyve been forced into too many tiny boxes. they literally just accepted the fact they were gonna be helping chosen when second was literally forced. they still went out of their way to try and save chosen. theyve attacked whoever hurt their friends when rygb all go down. if we continue to go with the "all hollowheads are 0 when created" logic, second is nine. NINE. turning ten this october but WTF. THAT IS A CHILD. NOT EVEN DOUBLE DIGITS
ALL THE HOLLOWHEADS ARE CHILDREN WITH THE "0 at creation" LOGIC (i mean, cho and vic are technically like 16, but still) can i PLEASE just shove them into a massive pillow fort with blankets and hug them?? is that SO MUCH TO ASK ALAN
anyways im gonna go make a playlist abt them cya
#animation vs animator#ava victim#ava chosen one#ava dark lord#ava second coming#hollow heads#alan becker#let me hug them#please please please#he/they victim#he/him chosen#she/it dark#they/them second#literally just used whatever pronouns i felt like#dont have set in stone headcannons abt pronouns#at this rate this is just gonna become a rant account#sorry for being dead#it'll happen again#traumatized children#sorry if the post is hard to read#wrote all of this at a late hour#ive given up on grammar#might color code later#to make it easier to read#im tired#rant
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What are your favorite pet names for your fave blorbos??? Mine are beebee for Bachira and YoiCHU! *insert cheek kiss* for Isagi~
d’aaawwww nonnie you got me giggling over this how cute<33 i may have gone overboard like always lol but here are some of my takes !! (these low key just. turned into headcanons oop i hope that’s okay!)
SHIDOU RYUSEI — HELLCAT
this is my personal favorite because it just fits him so fucking well and i know it in my soul of souls that he’d adore it. like yes he is your feral hellcat<3 your demon spawn<3 but you’re crazy enough to love that about him, to turn it into an endearing pet name, even. bastard would probably purr and meow just to lay it on real thick pls i can never be normal about this man.
ITOSHI RIN — RINNIE
calling the ever stoic, foul-mouthed younger itoshi smth as sickeningly sweet as rinnie is the best thing since sliced bread actually idc if i’m basic! it’s true! ofc he’d absolutely abhor it at first, snapping at you to “fucking stop calling him that” which just spurs you on more tbh lol he’s furious with you. he thinks he abhors the nickname, then one day you drop the cutsy act to return to his given name and he’s just left standing there like🧍baffled and pissed out of his mind bc where’s his mf rinnie huh?? i want to eat him so bad.
MIKAGE REO — HANDSOME
i feel like reo – party due to his lavish upbringing but mostly because he is just the ultimate lover boy – would definitely gravitate towards more ‘classier’ terms of endearment. call him handsome, or go all in by calling to him as my love and his chest is instantly puffing up like some bird about to perform the sickest mating dance ever lol he’d be so smug about it. definitely, 100% the type of guy that still gets weak in the knees when you call him husband – doesn’t matter if you’ve been married three months or 5 years he eats that shit up!
SANZU HARUCHIYO — CANDYMAN
okay so because i’m a little shit i can’t ignore the juxtaposition of the big bad criminal being committed to the pink aesthetic (don’t get me wrong i’m obsessed with it), so in my head i could get away with calling sanzu annoying crap like barbie doll or cupcake – or probably his most tolerated one out of the bunch, candyman (because of the, ya know, murderous implications lmfao). all in a very sarcastic vain ofc! i feel like calling him by his given name, or just simply haru, would def be all the more special then <3 (… BUT bc he’s sick in the head he’d probably love it even more if you romanticized his psychotic tendencies – call him stuff like my lovely little killer and he’s a goner he is clinically insane like.)
HANEMIYA KAZUTORA — MY (EVERYTHING)
let me just clarify that this man is not picky! whatsoever! he’s so starved for love he’d literally eat any term of endearment straight out of your mouth if he could. everything is one the table: baby, honey, sweetheart, darling, love – you name it, tora likes it, he wants you to keep calling him sweet names until he’s drowned in it. but what gets him really over the moon is if you just insert a small little ‘my’ in front of it. yeah, he loves being called baby, but my baby? he’s on his knees for you goodbye he loves the subtle ownership of it. (not to get n/sfw but uh… call him your sweet boy when you’re overstimming him and his pupils might just turn heart-shaped he’s ruined.)
KAKUCHO — YOUR LAST NAME
i only recently found out that “hitto” is actually a fanon made last name for kaku darling and i’d like to report that i’m still devastated over it so :( when you two get married – because he will marry you, if he’s in love like that’s it he’s locking you down for life – you ask him if he’d like to take your last name and yeah he cries a little he’s so touched pls :( so when people refer to him as L/n-san or mr. L/n he’s still not over it he has to remind himself that they are, in fact, talking to him. the effect triples when it’s you that calls him as such he’s so proud to wear your name brb gonna bawl my eyes out.
#—ping! new message from (anon)#beebee for bachira is adorable :3 i tag him as bachibabe when i reblog stuff of him and ngl kinda proud of that one still#and yoichu is the perfect excuse to steal a kiss from him!!#—tr.thoughts!#—bllk.thoughts!#blue lock x reader#bllk x reader#blue lock headcanons#tokyo revengers x reader#tokyo rev x reader#tokyo revengers headcanons
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do the moot game with the generator!!!!
YAYAYAYAYY THANK YOUU I definitely did NOT beg for this 😁 doing this on the plane right before they force me to turn airplane mode on
May: @tyunni
10/10. THIS IS SOOO CANON DONT EVEN LIE 😭 fyi may is always tired and always on their bed so I see this happening 100% but maybe like 10 years into their relationship bc I do Not see 17 year old riki giving people back massages
Liz: @junityy
10000/10. DONT BE SILLYYYYY liz always complaining abt the weather and never preparing properly for it so she catches a cold and then jay scolds her but also secretly loves taking care of her by cooking soups and warm dishes and wrapping her in blankets and then one day he says FUCK IT and kisses her and gets sick too 💔
Nadia: @yjwfav / @mrkfav
12/10. Yes. HAVE U SEEN MARK LEES LAP 😭😭😭😭 who would date him and NOT use it as a pillow or a seat are u joking and Nadia is like mark lee obsessed why would she not ?? Also I can see mark liking this so yes this is canon
Sage: @jaeyunverse
5/10. I can see jeno trying to do this and sage noticing his forehead coming closer and going straight into defence mode. LIKE HANDS WILL BE THROWN BC WHY TF IS HE GETTING THIS CLOSE WHEN I FEEL SICK??? That’s the thoughts running through her head I can feel it
Tifff: @geombyu
-1000/10 don’t lie 😭😭😭 tifff would dream of doing this, wake up, run to the toilet and giggle into her hands, sneak back into bed and contemplate doing it over and over again but never does. AND SUNGHOON WOULD NEVER HE WOULD BE LIKE WTF IS SHE DOING IM TRYING TO SLEEP 😭 but then when he realises she wants to kiss him he just stiffens and blushes like he’s just a dead body w bright red cheeks 😭 two awkward and shy cute people
Cici: @iyeonjuni
7/10. Idk I see this happening 😭 like u wanted to do smth cute and couply together but then it just ends up in a DISASTER but it’s yeonjun and u know him he would literally say smth crazy like “look, even this lasagna has the hots for you 😏” DO U SEE THE VISION
Eju: @equalheart
2/10. I dont see this happening jungwon is too responsible and too much of a good kisser for this to even have a chance of happening. But if it did and you two had matching bruises he would 100% giggle and make you take selfies. Jungwon gives me the vibes that he likes to poke his own bruise idk
Dori: @odxrilove
500000/10 AHAHAAHAHAHA THIS IS SO FUNNY BOTH OF THEM HAVE FILTHY MOUTHS THIS WOULD SOOOO HAPPEN and I can just see this happening and then hoshi going 😮 when he realises he swore too and then the two of them just bursting into laughter 😭😭😭
Mita: @eternallyhyucks
1929393929/10 yes. Yes. YES!!!! Haechan sending sexy selfies of him spread out and looking delicious and then mita sending THE MOST UNSERIOUS SELFIE BACK INCAN VISION IT ALL NOW 😭😭😭 just her going 🫢 or 😮💨 in her selfies and in some she’s straight up 🤨 and then haechan would reply like “I love it when u judge me do it again” PLS LMAO
THIS IS ALL I COULD DO KYLA VAL MIKA LOLA ILL DO YOURS ON TWT LATER !!!!
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Ohh I'm happier now! Thank you so much for this info! I find it so fascinating how vecna just seens now like if someone got all of Henry's good traits, his empathy, his desire to help people and twisted them horribly into what we see with vecna, a wrathful murderer that still genuinely believes he's helping people and making the world a better place, he really just became a more interesting character
(This was irt "I want to be better, but I can't")
This is smth I talked about in my "Henry's not a psychopath" post!! Everything about Vecna is far more akin to pathological altruism than anything else. Whatever's going on, it's taking "Henry's" (we'll call him Henry here for simplicity's sake) innate desire to help people and twisting it into "it's time for your suffering to end".
You can see the roots of it on stage. He decides he wants to give Patty a nice dream to turn her day around, and he just...does it. He saves Mr. Newby, even though he later questions whether or not he should have after learning about how Mr. Newby stole Patty from her mother to save his own marriage. He's borderline obsessed with driving Patty away in Act 1, citing her safety despite being desperately lonely and wanting to be friends with her. He tries to save her over and over, to the point of telling her to leave him behind/sacrificing himself to Brenner and the Shadow. Even in the accident, when he lashes out and collapses the balcony and Patty falls, he's reaching out to try and catch her with little care for his own safety.
Henry is always saving people. He acts like it's his job to do so, even at his own expense, which...well. It tracks with his Captain Midnight/superhero special interest. He's already got a savior complex!
That, paired with the Shadow and years of mistreatment, primes whichever One he is to become Vecna. Both forces, Brenner and the Shadow, have just been pushing and twisting this guy's natural desire for goodness into something horrible.
Hence what I said in the psychopathy post:
His lines are straight up self-soothing. With the added dimension of the Shadow from TFS, the whole "ending your suffering" schtick feels like coping. He's coping with what's happening by reframing it so he's saving and freeing people.
Despite the Shadow's maliciousness and the deterioration of Henry's mind by decades of unimaginable trauma, it remains very important to him that he's doing good things and saving people. It just manifests as something warped and twisted once it passes through Trauma and Shadow.
Vecna's a bad guy, no doubt...but Henry isn't evil.
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k I don’t really care MUCH about cvlur’s past actions in the hobby with her preorder & shit, cuz I wasn't directly affected. it was one of those things where everyone was talking bout it but i didn't order/want a doll so it wasn’t personal to me. It sucked/etc/hope the victims got compensated/etc. That's a disclaimer cuz I'm neither a cvlur fan or hater. This ain’t about her directly. It’s about her fans/haters who like to debate this constantly lately. Which I seem to fuckin be surrounded by. Also, my tone is kinda aggro to some people cuz I curse but i don’t actually lose sleep over this shit lmfao.
what DOES annoy me anytime someone brings this up like that last confession crying about how ppl are so mad she fucked up when she was “young” - girl is ALMOST 30 NOW if I understand correctly. If it happened 10 yrs ago she wouldnt have been in her early 20s, she’d been like 16-19 and THAT would be WAY more understandable to say “she was young and didn’t know any better.” this shit happened LESS than 10 yrs, she was like, college age, which for US is 18-22 TYPICALLY if you go to college fresh outta highschool for a 4 year degree. ppl in their early 20s, while yeah, in the grand scheme of LIFE are young, are still ADULTS, capable of running complex fuckin tasks from working at a company to managing money for a group order. ppl in their early 20s include 20-24. stop infantilizing people. People can make mistakes at ANY age and severely misjudge a situation (intentional or not what she did). cvlur and I are roughly the same iirc, at the time of sending this im 28, turning 29. If she’s younger than me, she was running an order as a highschooler, which she wasn’t.
There were SO fucking many ppl in college in their “early 20s” who, mature or not, worked with large sums of money, complex organizational structures, etc. some ppl are suited for that shit, some ain’t. You can straight up just say “she was under prepared for the situation” instead of “oh poor bby she was so young 🥺 she just didn’t know!!!” you sound like a fuckin moron, anon. Do you treat every 20yr old who makes a simple mistake at the grocery store like that too? You better tip ur waiters extra who are under 25 even if they spill your drink or make you wait bc they were just too young to know better, they can’t be blamed for that
and for the other person in the comments too, “adults obsessing over her” or whatever …… she’s an adult she’s an adult she’s an adult no wonder why she avoids talking to ppl both haters and fans alike take away her fucking agency SO much. OFF THE SUBJECT OF CVLUR but relating to scammers rn tho, the same can STILL be said about it. Their age doesn’t = not knowing enough about running a good thing. Look at ppl complaining abt dxg1rly, is she worse than everyone younger bc she’s said she’s almost 40, so she only went in with bad intents and not a mistake like cvlur? same with bvmf?
Not sayin dx or bvmf or anyone else who’s been late on shipping/etc etc is absolved of anything, or that they’ve done smth, and same with cvlur, cuz i’ve never ordered from any of these ppl. but don’t give ppl the weak ass get outta jail “oh i was 21 I was just too young to know!”to keep using esp if they really did do something bad. Also, anon, late shipping is absolutely scam territory, and if it happened to you I bet you'd cry scam too by year 2 or whatever lmfaooooo. Thanks for coming to my “I don’t like that the community infantilizes so much shit about this hobby for grown adults” ted talk, I’m off to go scam someone or smth cuz i’m in my 20s so I’m young and don’t know any better lmfao
~Anonymous
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Hi I’m love anon revenge to the fact that Tubby got a hate anon (they will learn their hate only makes me more powerful)
God your art is stunning, I’ve been wanting to say this for a bit because oh my god it is beautiful. I can’t quite explain what it is about but it’s one of my favourite art styles I’ve ever seen. My favourite price of yours is probably the one of Scott’s hand holding Jimmy’s head while his nose is bleeding (hopefully that description makes sense). I don’t know how you did it but I feel genuine fear just looking at that piece the emotion is so well done. Also I love the general shininess of your art I’m not sure what exactly that means but it is so captivating I love it.
Also the piece with Pearl and Jimmy is so cool the way you use artsyles to communicate ideas is so creative and it works so well
Also you reblog so much cool stuff that I love seeing and I think it’s so cool that you show love not only to the source material you love but also to other fans and artists. I love seeing people support other creators and create friendships and bonds with people who love the same things as them. It’s beautiful and so human
HI ANON???? sorry for taking so long to respond I had this open for hours just kinda staring at it and melting into a puddle i hkhkfdhklhfdhhhhhlljf. me pictured below staring at my inbox for 6 hours straight
i love the implication that you are a balancing force of nature anon.... (alas i have actually never received hate anons so i suppose i need the evil version of u to show up sometime later to bring true balance.)
I know the exact pieces you mean!! I can't express how happy it made me reading that you had like. a favourite piece of mine i just hkhdlkflhkshlfhh a lot of the times posting art online feels kinda like chucking things into the void and sometimes the void says smth back but this is more like oh shit there's been people there the whole time. there is no void there's just a bunch of guys underneath a big blanket and some of those guys are really awesome!! and some of those guys are really awesome and they like my drawings waughh
I love the life series so much I can't get over how it's been.. more than a year now that ive been obsessing over it but the fandom is so wonderful too. Even the discourse brings me joy in a weird kinda sociopathic way (idk man I just find it kind of funny/entertaining watching people argue about cubes kissing). I used to not reblog stuff on this blog at all (i kinda just assumed that's how tumblr worked) but over time my art blog got more popular and I was like.... man there's all these other cool artists that I want people to see.
I love this fandom and I love my mutuals and I love artists I follow and I love talking everyday to my friends about block people it's so awesome and cool I want to do it forever. and I love this message anon I love you!!!!! Idk what else to put here uhhhh scott smajor attack
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🌟🪐Star baby🪐🌟
So update on the writer guy:
Honestly ever since we exchanged face reveals, he's acting like he's obsessed with the way I look. Specifically, my eyeballs. At first, it was cute and all...
But yesterday I felt like it was getting too much about me (specifically my face) so I tried to have a constructive or fun conversation. I asked him how his day went (it was Saturday) and how did he spend it.
He said nothing and his life is pretty boring; he does nothing all day. Well, we spent 4 hours the day before just talking about his hobbies and passion for books and movies and writing so I was kinda thrown off. Which I suppose is not too bad, BUT THEN! He said his mind is occupied by something else entirely. Internally I went "Ain't no way he's gonna say it" and I played dumb and tried my best to steer away when he said "It's you. And specifically how you would look in casuals haha."
Star he wanted pictures of how I looked in jeans and shirts, I was MEGA disappointed. I felt objectified, not admired. I felt so disappointed because we bonded over meaningful conversations about our shared interests and thoughts and well... I just wanted a wholesome friendship ._.
We haven't talked since I said no to him. I even watched a movie and told him I watched Before Sunrise and it's beautiful and he replied "Good".
I'm so done. If we ever happen to talk again and he asks for pics or smth I'll straight up block him.
Anyways
HOW'S YOU MY LIDDOL LOVE???
How was ur weekend, I read the posts about the party and how much fun u had and my heart swelled and felt so warm. I love it when you're happy and having a good time; you deserve it considering the kind of week you had. Even so, I hope from here on your days are filled with warmth and loads of fun and love.
I LOVE YOU MY STAR💫
Your,
🦝
HI MY ANGELLLL 🫶🫶
Oh my god not the eyeball obsession…… HELPPPP THAT’S SO WEIRD???? I fucking HAAAATE IT when you’re in a talking phase with someone and they have to make it sexual 🤕 the first time my ex boyfriend did it I cried so hard because I genuinely thought we were building a connection and I brushed it off the next day, but looking back I would just cut off somebody who did that bc it’s always so random and it just completely throws off the dynamic. Like the minute some guy just wants pictures I will just straight up block now 😐 I’m so sorry bby I thought he seemed so cool and I was excited at least you’d have a wholesome friendship with him but it sucks he had to make it weird ☹️ if he tries to bother you again I will actually fight him frfr
ANYWAYS IM GOOOOOD my weekend was simultaneously so fun but tiring at the same time and I didn’t sleep at all last night so I’m so excited to be done w work today because I’m going to nap allllll day 🫶 I might order a coffee or something to keep me awake bc I feel so unproductive but other than that I’m pulling thru !! I also can’t believe it’s April omg this year is flying by frfr
I LOVE YOU BABY ANGELLLL I hope you have the best week ever and I’m sending you all my love always xoxoxoxo remember to eat and drink lots of water. I love u 👼💕💖💞💘💓💗 boop
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I want thank you so much for introducing me to Taylor Swift! I didn't use to listen to her songs before (dunno why, sometimes I want to check smth out and then I forget), but you talking about her music so passionately moved me. I've just listened to Midnights and it completely blew me away. Bejeweled feels so empowering, bright and asserive, I straight up cried during Snow On the Beach, because it sounds so delicate and hopeful, a bit melancholic but filled with love and tenderness, like a beacon of light gleaming amidst the darkness. But I think Labyrinth is my favorite track on the album, it's just... All the thoughts I've had, the fears I have, and hearing her speak about this kind of place you find yourself in felt so validating to me. "I'm falling in love, oh no, I'm falling in love again", "You know how scared I am of elevators, never trust it if it rises fast, it can't last" - this line, it gripped me and broke me. The idea that grief, like you said, is a continuous experience, and trauma is something you'll be getting over for years and years, and even if you finally heal and grow as a person, it can still impact your life and happiness, in a way that you can't really trust anything again. If something you loved deceived you, hurt you, shot you in the heart in the past, how can you be sure it won't happen again? How can you open up and love something, someone without being swayed by fear of what happened the last time you loved with this intensity? It's almost like opening your old wounds in a way. Tracing them with a knife. If you're detached, if you're shielding yourself, it can never hurt you as much. But love leaves you vulnerable. Love leaves you open and defenseless. It's like handing somebody a gun and saying: "Here, I trust you." But what if you shouldn't?
Then there's also "I thought the plane was goin' down, how'd you turn it right around?" For me it's like: "I've been hurt before and betrayed before, I was wounded and grew a thicker skin, I made myself distant, thinking I could never love anyone this much again, but now you are making me feel things, you're bringing those vibrant colors back into my life and I'm so surprised and startled. I'm falling for you and I'm so afraid to fall for you. Please don't hurt me."
I apologize if I'm reading this wrong and projecting my own issues a little too much, and I admit I don't know much at all about Taylor's personal life, so my interpretation is probably entirely false. Still, this song speaks to me on a fundemental level and I find myself here too, I can relate and I really love the way she writes her music. Please never stop talking about the things you love, your passion is so igniting and your blog is truly a beautiful place!!!
What are your favorite tracks from Midnights?
YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND, INTRODUCING PEOPLE TO TAYLOR AND KNOWING THEY THEN LOVE HER TOO IS MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WORLD! I READ THIS LIKE:
this message makes me so so soft oh my goodness. thank you for sharing this with me, and for reading all my gushing, emotional, silly little posts because it brings me unending joy to discuss music, especially hers, and the depth of love i have for it.
the fact that you enjoyed midnights fills my heart!!! your descriptions are totally beautiful and fit exactly the themes and emotions she's depicting.
I straight up cried during Snow On the Beach, because it sounds so delicate and hopeful, a bit melancholic but filled with love and tenderness, like a beacon of light gleaming amidst the darkness. like this, that is precisely the story she's telling, i cried hearing it too because the wonder and tenderness of it is so tangible.
i am obsessed with your explanation of labyrinth and the fact that it was your favorite - in the video analysis i watched yesterday, the professor discussing the album said it's his favorite song she's ever written and that it (along with a couple of other moments on the album) brought him to tears with how affecting and accessible and vulnerable it is. it's really cool to hear this from you too. her vocals in the song are incredibly beautiful to me, and the way she expresses her fears, and the swirling anxiety of it, and the almost miraculous amazement of realizing that you're finally held and safe. i love the simplicity of the progression from, "uh-oh, i'm falling in love again, oh no, i'm falling in love again" to the simply breath of, "oh. i'm falling in love again." it says so much in so little.
The idea that grief, like you said, is a continuous experience, and trauma is something you'll be getting over for years and years, and even if you finally heal and grow as a person, it can still impact your life and happiness, in a way that you can't really trust anything again. If something you loved deceived you, hurt you, shot you in the heart in the past, how can you be sure it won't happen again? How can you open up and love something, someone without being swayed by fear of what happened the last time you loved with this intensity? It's almost like opening your old wounds in a way. Tracing them with a knife. If you're detached, if you're shielding yourself, it can never hurt you as much. But love leaves you vulnerable. Love leaves you open and defenseless. It's like handing somebody a gun and saying: "Here, I trust you." But what if you shouldn't? Then there's also "I thought the plane was goin' down, how'd you turn it right around?" For me it's like: "I've been hurt before and betrayed before, I was wounded and grew a thicker skin, I made myself distant, thinking I could never love anyone this much again, but now you are making me feel things, you're bringing those vibrant colors back into my life and I'm so surprised and startled. I'm falling for you and I'm so afraid to fall for you. Please don't hurt me."
i'm just quoting your entire wonderful description because you could not be more right. i'm serious, you're spot-on, this is what she's describing, this is the experience the song is about and i'm touched that it spoke to you like this with such clarity. it underscores not only the impact of her writing and how empathetic it is, but how empathetic and perceptive you are too, and it is a gift to read this. it proves to me how powerfully universal her music is, and that's one of the reasons she's been special to people and been successful for so long. i'm not even articulating myself well here because i'm teary over how this resonated for you. 💗💗💗
I can relate and I really love the way she writes her music. forever mood.
my favorite tracks are...tentatively because the entire album keeps growing and transforming for me the more i listen to it!...snow on the beach, sweet nothing, lavender haze, labyrinth, and you're on your own, kid (or mastermind, they keep competing for me). that's from the standard 13, if we include the extra seven 3AM tracks, it gets even trickier for me to decide! (i truly believe would've, could've, should've and bigger than the whole sky are two of the most profoundly impacting songs she's ever written, i also can barely listen to them despite how lovely they are because they HURT). plus the great war is fantastic and opens up a lot of things, it was brave of her to put quite a lot this forth in such a raw way.
do you want a guide for more of her music to listen to? because i am always thrilled to provide one!!! 😄💖
Please never stop talking about the things you love, your passion is so igniting and your blog is truly a beautiful place!!! 🥺🥰 this is the sweetest and highest compliment, and i'm grateful for it, words like these are always encouraging and stay with me. thank you for sharing your light with me too.
#I LOVE YOU#snowstormserenade#letterbox#this message is so so beautiful you have no idea#taylor swift#people are too nice to me#my heart
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i'm going on a short break.
uhm. things have not been going well.
i will be taking a short break (maybe a week, or so?) to get my shit back together and start working on writing again.
and while i'm at it, i'm going to explain what happened under the cut. there are triggering themes in here so please take caution when reading this.
my adoptive dad and i are not on the best terms and i don't think we'll ever be able to live how we used to.
i was very sheltered growing up (so much so that i only recently learned how to use the stove and washer, and i'm turning 19 this year) and a lot of how i act and the way i respond to things is based off what my adoptive mother did to me, and what my adoptive father *didn't* do.
i never knew how to do anything, and was considered "spoiled" by a lot of people but i don't look at it that way. i mean, sure, i had everything i needed and more but the one thing i can say i never truly had:
parents.
my adoptive mom was sick. like, she couldn't walk, sick. oftentimes i had to do a lot of shit for her. my adoptive father was always working. he was never home and when he was home, he'd never talk to me and go straight to bed.
my (adoptive) mom was really abusive. mentally, physically, you name it. and a lot of people excused it because of her "poor health". it grew so bad that i had started cutting my entire arm up. (i think i had over 100 of them, i counted. i was so angry that night.) she was allowed to do things to me that my real mom would fucking kill her for. she also touched me inappropriately for three years.
(she also pinned me to the bed to do smth to my face for some reason? i was screaming for help but the other family members looked at me like i was crazy. the only one who believes me is my real mom. i love her.)
she also screamed at me for wanting a men's shirt. a full-black shirt with the pac-man board on the back of it. ....alright. (she said if she saw me wearing it at the time, she'd rip it off me and burn it. i was like, 13.)
i also say "was" because she's dead. and i hate to say it but good fucking riddance. oh but razz, it's not right to speak ill of the dead. she wasn't a good person when she was alive, she sure isn't when she's dead.
my father found out about me cutting and told me to basically suck it up. we never talked about it again although it continued to happen for 4 more years. (thankfully, i'm three years clean now. :thumbs up:)
when mom died, a lot of responsibility fell onto him. i was 15 when she died.
and he still treated me as if i didn't exist.
i was never important to him, never someone worth caring but his own children were. and i hate to fuckin say it, but if i was his own child, he'd pay more attention to me.
i've asked him for stuff that should've been taught to me. how to prepare myself for real life, how to do things that he can show me, but he's so obsessed with his reality ("money is everything") that he doesn't seem to notice. or maybe he does but doesn't care.
don't get me wrong, i love him. he's been a father figure to me all my life. but...
he's accused me of being a thief multiple times (i was not), told me that i needed to be put in a mental institution, and said that i was basically good for nothing. he also canceled my therapy appointments without telling me, and misgenders me constantly even though i remind him and remind him that i'm trans. (i've been out to him for two years, and out to my family for one.)
i know that he's old. (he's 70.) i know that he forgets things but goddamn it, he remembers all of my sister's shit. why can't i be special?! why am i the failure kid?!
i wish i could make up with him but lord knows i'm not forgiving him. i will fucking cut him off. i don't care if i'm in his will anymore. he pulled the same "you'll be sorry when i'm dead" shit my mother used to pull and to that i say "FUCK YOU".
that's the main story of everything. i could get into much worse (i've been through everything) but that's enough venting for me. sorry if i've made anyone uncomfortable.
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Biiiig paragraphs incoming cos im all caught up now!
So um. I fully didnt realise this was eunwoo until he sang in the wedding episode and i was like ok shoehorned in singing scene, this has to be an idol right? (In other words I should look at credits more often T.T) in my defense i only know like 2 astro songs lol
Also im adopting yul T.T hes so pure and helpful and all he wants is a pet dog someone pleaaaase get him a puppy...edit: holy fuck they make him deal with so much they make him pull like 3 all nighters, they rly brought him in as a fake bf... and then take him out as the third wheel xD hes so dramatic about it too acts like hes dying 10/10 oscar for the kid (nvm looked him up hes actually 2 years older than me thats not a kid skskks)
The bullying storyline made me SO nervous i fully thought shed succeed in ruining mr jins reputation (i cant handle storylines where people get unjustly framed for things it proper stresses me out skdjsk) or that something terrible was gonna happen to the poor student as a revenge from the bullies. but also seeing teachers actually care about students wellbeing over the reputation of the school is something that can be so 🥹 you love to see it
I rly loved the school trip episode!!! her coworker is still so set on trying to match her with mr lee skdjsk shes winning the wingman points but not the 'keeping up with the news' points (and also the cotton candy scene. What if i passed away. What if i straight up died. what then)
Oh and the cryptic new shaman girl? Shes def connected to mr lee right, cos shes got way too many mystic powers like he seems to have, what with his teleporting around to scare the bully. Oh and shes tryna break into his basement and all (and ofc yul gets roped into that too, he can never catch a break poor kid)
Edit; hes the MOUNTAIN SPIRIT RIGGGGGHT that explains the magic (i have to say i prefer him with long hair, men should have long hair more sksksk) super curious to see what his angle is since he cursed this family and is still keeping tabs on them but keeps implying mr jins gonna die or smth 😳
It was satisfying as fuck to watch him wreck the conspiracy theory streamer in one flick though, i was chanting KILL HIS ASS at the screen lmao
And YEAAAAAAAHGGHHH infinite fist pump!!! they finally confessed and kissed!!!!!! The way he instantly went for it too as soon as she said thr curse is over, you knooow hes been waiting for 3 months to do that,, wail theyre so sweet im holding them both gently theyre perfect for each other orz
Okay okay im done for now, youre free from the ask spam....but I didnt realise i was getting into an unfinished series when i started this so uh, i guess ill see you next week after the new episode airs xD
-🌱
your ask got me all excited again so I might rewatch the whole show before the new ep airs ajbfajflf
yea, Yul actor deserves an oscar, an emmy and even a grammy for his performance I WAS LITERALLY DYING
"i cant handle storylines where people get unjustly framed for things it proper stresses me out" SAME OMG I was so worried but thankfully the whole thing resolved during the same episode.
"hes been waiting for 3 months to do that" considering he fell in love with her the moment he first saw her, its WAY longer than that, which makes it even more precious (in episode 3 we saw a flashback of their first time meeting when Hae Na started working at the school, which was never clear if it was a while ago or just this year) check episode 3 33:27-34:54 (I speed watched the episode at work, I'm not that obsessed to know the exact timestamp, dont worry)
#im really happy you ended up likng and enjoying it#and cant wait for your new ask in a few days#next episode is gonna be FLUFFY#🌱 anon#long post
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Do you write yandere? If so, can I request skz yandere headcanons on how they would react when S/O rejects them because she doesn't wanna deal with whole drama that would come with dating an idol?
i mean kinda?? i have a seungmin yandere fic in my drafts sooo BUT YEAH
oh also, requests are not open but im just gonna do this one cause headcanons are kinda fun BUT REQUESTS ARE CLOSED <33
also why is the felix one so short-
Warnings; yandere!skz, rejection, k-dnapping, slight gaslightning or like manipulation, restraints, threats, aggression, mentions of masturbation, stockholm syndrome
Chan
nobody rejects him. nobody.
you two were friends from school and you were sooo happy when chan made it as an idol, finally persuing the dream he had been yapping on about for years.
but in the midst of that he realized that he had feelings for you, he missed you all the time, just wanting to hang out with you and maybe explore the things he had on his mind. so,, he decided to confess when you guys were at a cafe.
“look y/n,,, there’s something I wanna tell you” he started to which you tilted your head
“nooo,,, are you guys going on a tour again,,, i wil miss you sooo much channie” you said with a pout but the boy shook his head.
“i like you y/n”
your mouth stood agape, this was not what you expected and truthfully,,, not what you wanted.
“chan,,, y-you know thats not possible” you said with a frown, looking at him straight ahead.
“of course it is,,, why wouldn’t it be? w-what are you trying to say y/n?!” his voice started growing louder, you looking around in order to see that people werent turning their heads towards your table.
Minho
you have made a big big mistake my friend-
wont even hesitate to keep you hostage in his basement LIKE IM NOT JOKING-
might just tie you up and like,,, not even do anything to you, just talk to you and admire you, maybe tracing your facial features and cuddle closer on the cold floor
just wants to keep you as a pet or smth and you are scared out of your mind cause you cant move cause of the restraints, you cant speak because you have silvertape across your lips that he only removes to feed you but if you start screaming you wont get any so you deicde to just stay calm and quiet before someone saves you and play along.
i mean you do,,, kinda fall for him but you know you cant,, but you cant help but to fall for him and miss him whenever he’s out on schedule things
he always returns to you and you get so happy when you see the little crevice of light from outside when he opened the basement door
whenever he lies next to you, you put your head against his shoulder and take in his scent the best you can
he told you everyday that he would let you go if you agreed to date him but you shook your head,, maybe cause you liked being his prey.
Changbin
he’s more of the threatening type of yandere,,, like,, not that he’s violent but if you try to block his number he will create new ones and keep on sending you messages about how you have betrayed him and how he wished that you loved him back and all that,,,,
you guys often meet because you go to the same college and are students in the same department sooo,,,, avoiding him is pretty impossible
he stares a lot at you,,, you guys have a couple of classes together and he just stares the entire time, his eyes are just filled with revenge, he somehow wants you make you his, own you but he doesnt know how yet, for now he can just look.
watch this fucking message conversation just be this;
[why did you talk to him during class?]
[you could have just asked me]
[nobody loves you like i do. no one y/n]
you are never getting rid of him basically,,
he’s gonna get to you first ;))
Hyunjin
i feel like he goes more to the stalking route than the kidnapping and drugging and whatnot-
ok,,, you rejected him,,, but that doesnt mean you’re getting rid of him.
ohmygod what if he turns into a peeping tom- cause he obviously knows where you live.
like yall were not even that close?? he just saw you backstage at one of the concerts and thought you looked good so he decided to go up to, you werent an idol so no problem he thought.
but he gets a bit too,, hasty with his decisions and often falls for people randomly and so when he politely greeted you and gave you his number you simply shook your head, explaining that this wouldn’t be possible since you worked in the same industry and you needed to stay clear out of any scandals in order to keep your job.
no was not answer in Hyunjins mind.
luckily he managed to catch your full name by flickering through some papers in an office and also saw your full adress there, knowing exactly what he was going to do on his free time.
Jisung
if im being completely honest,,, i have no idea-
like,,, he gives me kinda pervy yandere vibes,,,
what if youre like his ex before he became an idol and now he wants to get back together with you-
oh,,, he masturbates to your pictures-
i feel like he always thinks about you, wondering what you like and wants to write songs about you but he doesnt do much-
but when he finds out that you have been hired by the same company as him to work as a like,,, economics accountant thingy he is all of a sudden vEEERY interested-
always asking the manager of when the group will have meetings with the accounting team,,, although they had nothing to do with them-
he just wanted to be in a conference room with you (and think pervy things about you in your tight office skirt and white blouse)
you went to the toilet on day and you saw him lurking around the same floor,,, WHICH ONCE AGAIN WAS NOT CONNECTED TO THE GROUP AT ALL-
and idk,,, probably sneaks in with you and locks the door before you even react that theres someone else in the toilet-
i feel like he’s pretty mild,,, but when he’s alone with you he is aggressive broooo
probably pins you to the wall and threatens you or smth along those lines,,,,,
(writing this is what my life has become to-)
Felix
“what do you think you’re doing?”
you turn around again, you had just thought of just leaving with a vague answer to his question but he was not having it.
“answer.”
his words sounded cold, his dark voice making an entrace, the exact one you’ve heard on many of the songs you listened to.
“felix,,, you have to understand,,, u-um,, if we date theres gonna be some issues” you said but he just stared at you with cocky eyebrows and a dark gaze, running his tongue on the inside of his cheek.
“do you think i care? would i ask you if i cared?” he said to which you shook your head automatically, what more could you do?
“you get until tomorrow to think and if i don’t get the answer i want well,,, we’ll see what i’ll do to you.”
Seungmin
he plots shit behind your back yk?
he’s more of the sneaky type of yanderes (oop spoiler to a fic heh)
like he makes this like fucking year long plan where the objective of the mission is to make you obssessed with him-
he starts kinda subtely,,, first its going to the same gym as you and like,,, knowing where you placed your stuff
and then he starts putting small notes like under your waterbottle when you went to grab something that say like “i think youre cute, call me” and then his number
you obviously dont react,,, because why the fuck would you contact a stranger at the gym
BUT THEN you realize that its him, its mf kim seungmin. yo,,,, u didnt know he went to this gym,,, that was not,,, the best-
of course you got a bit interested,,, you wanted to know how he was off camera,,, like just in his everyday life and i meeean,,, he was attractive but obviously you should stay away bc,,, he’s a celebrity but seungmin didnt want to stay away
he notes somehow started to get more aggressive,,, suddenly being like “why are you ignoring me?” and such,,,
and one night you were left alone in the gym with him,,, it was sooo quiet, only the sounds of your strained breaths as you lifted a dumbell
here where the plan came to play ;))
Jeongin
he’s obsessed with you and you are not going anywhere, even if you rejected him.
he’s more clingy?? LIKE HE WILL NOT LEAVE YOU
ok sure,, he falls more into the stalking category too,,,
also veeeery much a obssessed kinda yandere,,, like his mind is not thinking about how to like capture you,,, more about how to make you soooo comfortable and fool you into loving him despite the circumstances?
i just imagine that you work in a cafe and jeongin often meets you there when he buys coffee and you are already in awe when you see fucking yang jeongin enter the coffee shop on your shift but you were even more excited when he leaves his phone number on a napkin and slides it over the counter before leaving.
you thought about it,,, contemplating multiple times but,,, you decided it would be best not to since well,,, safety purposes
but he would visit you and every day his face got more and more perplexed cause he wondered why you didnt call
mf would not leave you alone, he would even wait outside the coffee shop until you finished your shift and walk you home,,, so now he knew where you lived-
and then do the same thing over and over again until you talked to him.
does. not. give. up.
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Okay so i watched CPeak bc of your blog and I'm obsessed so I was casually scrolling through your blog for more things to watch (you have great taste 🤣) and I saw smth called Carmilla? It looked gay? I'm confused but I will watch absolutely anything with lesbians in it I'm so starved for representation 🤣
Thank you!
Carmilla is indeed very very gay. The basic plot is "girl meets girl; one girl is a vampire."
There are two main flavors of Carmilla, if what you're after is a decent amount of Gay:
1. The original novel. Published in 1872 after being serialized in a magazine over the winter of 1870-71, this is a classic. Beautiful prose, dripping with Gothic melodrama and themes of love and death and consumption (the concept, not the disease)...chef's kiss.
It was also written by a straight guy in, you know, the 1870s. So it ends with a bunch of Noble Gentlemen killing the vampire and rescuing the Fair Maiden. Tragic.
It's been adapted many times over the years, but adaptation-wise most gay Millennials and Gen Zers prefer-
2. The web series. Running on YouTube from 2014 to 2016, this took some very basic elements of the book and ran with them. Remember the golden age of classic literature web series adaptations? It was a strange and wonderful time.
In this version, the human protagonist Laura starts her first year at Silas University only to discover that her new school is up to its figurative eyebrows in supernatural weirdness. Including the matter of her roommate, Betty, who goes missing early in the semester to be replaced by a moody, snarky Rock Chick(TM) named Carmilla.
It lasted for three seasons and a movie, and features a great deal more character development for the leads than the novel does- and a happy ending, to boot.
(Also Sumerian mythology. Not really sure why they went that direction, but I'm not mad about it.)
Personally, I recommend both of those two main options. And if you want to delve into other adaptations of the novel, go for it.
...then come back and let me rant at you about why I despise The Vampire Lovers (1970).
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