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#guys we can forgive the war crimes hes just a silly guy
kiwisandcoconuts · 2 months
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when u have to live with the fact that the blood of millions is on ur hands but at least u get backstage passes to ur favorite band :)
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akunekoblog · 1 year
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EP 1, Part 5 — Chapter Thirty Six: The Butler’s Rest
This is google translated!
The Commander: What the hell is going on!?
Ammon: I mean, who is this old man?
Berrien: The leader of the mercenary group that tried to attack us.
Berrien: It seems like Bastien-kun’s fated partner.
Haures: The crime of hurting your friends is serious.
The Commander: Hey, hey… just spare me with my life! If you spare me, I’ll thank you as much as I can!
The Commander: Oh, I know a lot of nobles! I can prepare whatever you want!
The Commander: That’s right! Shall we explore the weaknesses of the Sardis family?
Haures: Do you think we’ll be tempted by such an invitation?
The Commander: Damn, damn it… Hey, Bastien, help me!
The Commander: I apologise for that time too! So.. at least my life…
Bastien: Do not be silly…
Bastien: I won’t forgive you.
Bastien: But... I have no intentions of doing anything to you here.
The Commander: What?
Bastien: Firstly, none of your companions are dead.
Bastien: The key point has been removed, everyone fainted.
The Commander: How on earth…
Bastien: You all aren’t even warriors, so it’s not even worth it to lay a hand on you.
Bastien: All of you will be handed over to the guard of the Grobaner family.
Bastien: Commander... you'll live in prison for the rest of your life and repent your sins.
The Commander: Damn… Damn…
After a while
Haures: All of the guys in the reserve corps were tied up with ropes.
Berrien: Thank you. All that's left now is to wait for the guards to come, right?
Boschi: I searched the area, but the captain of the Sardis family who ran away and Yuhan are no longer there.
Berrien: Is that so...
Haures: No way, the Sardis family... You set a trap like this to kill us.
Berrien: Regarding this case... We have to have a thorough discussion about what to do in the future.
Haures: You can think of it as a declaration of war against us.
Berrien: It's just... In this situation, it is not a very good choice to start a war with the Sardis family.
Berrien: Our mission as devil butlers is... to annihilate the angels from this world.
Fennesz: I think so too. Even if humans fight each other, it means nothing.
Boschi: Well then, are you just going to overlook and let this pass by as it is?
Fennesz: I didn't say that. We just have to be more careful.
Ammon: Boschi, please calm down.
Boschi: Tsk. I know.
Muu: It’s kind of a big deal, isn’t it?
Choices
Fighting between humans…
I want to be as calm as possible.
???: Guuu…
Muu: Huh…? This sound…
Boschi: Hey, who is it? What’s with the sound of your stomach in this situation?
Lono: Wow, sorry. I'm hungry...
Bastien: Guuu…
Haures: You too, Bastien…
Ammon: Hehe. Both of you are fine now, aren't you?
Fennesz: It's nice to be young. It's amazing that he’s already got an appetite even though he’s moved so much.
Haures: You're not that old either.
Ammon: Ah~, I'm getting hungry too. I want to go home and eat Lono’s delicious rice~.
Lono: Mr. Ammon! You're saying something that makes me so happy!
Boschi: I want to eat meat. Hey, Lono... I'll order a steak or something.
Lono: Woah! Steak is good!
Ammon: Boschi-san, aren't you eating only meat? It's bad for your body if you don't eat vegetables either.
Boschi: Huh? Eating what you like shouldn't be bad for your body, right?
Haures: Haha... Boschi. You're still childish like that.
Boschi: Who’s the child?
Fennesz: Even Haures doesn't eat fish at all, Right?
Haures: Hey, Fennesz...!
Muu: Eh! Mr. Haures, do you have likes and dislikes?
That’s a little surprising.
Haures: Well, if you want to eat it, you can eat it. I just don't like it very much.
Haures: Hey, Fennesz. Don't say unnecessary things in front of the Lord.
Fennesz: Sorry, sorry.
Lono: Alright! When I get home, I'm going to cook with all my heart!
Lono: Lord! If there's anything you want to eat, just let me know!
Lono: This genius chef, Lono, will show you how to make anything!
Choices
Don’t overdo it?
Is your body okay?
Lono: Don't worry, I'm fine now! Look, as you can see...
Lono: Ow ow ow!
Muu: Lono-san! Are you sure you’re okay?
Berrien: It'll be better to cook after seeing Mr. Lucas.
Lono: I'll do that.
Lono: That's right, Bastien. Of course, you can help me cook.
Lono: Because it's "those who don't work should not eat"?
Bastien: If it's for rice, it can't be helped.
Muu: Hehehe. It seems like you're back to the old Bastien.
Options
That’s great.
I’m a little relieved.
Berrien: Then... I will prepare a carriage for the return trip, so please wait for a while.
Muu: Ahh!!
Berrien: What’s wrong, Muu-chan?
Muu: Oh, look at that!
Berrien: What is that?
Haures: Hey, that’s..
Angel: Die. For life.
chapter end
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vagabondreamer · 3 years
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After the Fall (4)
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Pairing: Lucifer x Angel! Fem! MC
Word Count: 2k
Series Summary: Angel! Fem! MC is part of an exchange program that sends her to the Devildom for a year.
Chapter Summary: MC spends some much needed time with Simeon, Luke, and Solomon.
Author’s Note: I totally headcanon that angels are touch-starved.
***
You wanted to shove his pride right down his throat. Throughout the week you had to endure his smug expression and his little comments that were meant to embarrass you, but it just made you mad. Being in the house was driving you insane. Mammon was always glued by your side trying to come up with money-making schemes, Asmo kept flirting, Satan was always asking about the history of your people - as if he didn’t have brothers more knowledgeable than you - and Beel, well, Beel was about the only person not driving you insane. You had barely seen Levi at all, so he didn’t really count at the moment.
Class had just ended, and you could already hear the boisterous Mammon waiting outside the hall for you. Needing a little break from the boys for the weekend, you looked to your angel friends.
“Hey Simeon, do you think I could spend a night or two at the Purgatory Hall?” He looked at you with concern.
“Is everything okay?”
“Yeah, I just feel overwhelmed.”
“Of course she can stay over for a sleepover!” Luke was practically jumping out of his seat.
“Well, I’d love to have you over, there just really isn’t any room. Plus, you’d have to ask Lucifer for permission.”
“Why do I have to ask Lucifer?” You were getting desperate. “I don’t mind sleeping on the floor.”
“He’s going to freak out again if you just leave without letting him know where you are.”
“Fine, whatever, I’ll ask. But, I’m not taking no for an answer.”
Walking out of class, you had one mission, and that was to find Lucifer.
“Hey MC, how was class?”
“It was alright. How was yours?”
“Boring. The only thing more boring than class is Lucifer’s lectures.” You laughed at that. Anytime Mammon involved you in one of his plans, it always ended in a lecture for the both of you.
“Speaking of, have you seen Lucifer? I need to talk to him.”
“He’s probably in a meeting with Lord Diavolo.” He grabbed your hand and started walking in the direction toward the council room. You looked down at your connected hands, and a weird feeling bubbled up in your stomach. “Hey! It’s not like I wanna hold your hand! There’s just too many demons, don’t want ya to get lost.”
You rolled your eyes. He was always a little dramatic. It’s not like you had never held hands with anyone before, but you were a kid back then. Angels didn’t really hug or hold hands as adults, it was always deemed a little too inappropriate - even if it was platonic. You liked the bubbly feeling, even if it was coming from Mammon.
Mammon led you down a long hall, at the end sat a set of large doors.
“Make sure ya knock before goin’ in.” Geez, if Mammon was the one to say that, then it must be pretty serious. “Think you can get Lucifer to take ya home?” You nodded and he went on his way.
Standing in front of the large doors, you gave a hard two knocks; the sound resonated in the halls. You could hear shuffling behind the door, and it swiftly opened up, showing Barbatos.
“Can I help you, MC?”
“I need to speak to Lucifer, is he here?”
“Can it wait until after the meeting? He’s with Lord Dia -”
“MC!” Speak of the devil.
“Hi, Lord Diavolo.” His smile and energy was contagious, you couldn’t help but smile back. But in the background, you could see the familiar scowl. You knew you had to make this quick. “I’m sorry for interrupting, I just -”
“It’s alright MC, come join us, we were just talking about student affairs.” He ushered you in, leading you to a seat right next to Lucifer. You felt completely out of place, and Lucifer’s stare wasn’t helping. “Before you speak, I just want to say I am sorry about what happened. You should know that those boys have been taken care of.”
And in that instant, you were taken back to that horrible memory. Your hand reached up to feel the scars that reside permanently on your face. You knew you were being irrational, Lucifer was just doing his job and the marks on your face would’ve been questioned - but you couldn’t help but be angry. Why did he have to report it? You looked over at him, expecting to meet his gaze, but his eyes were focused on Lord Diavolo. It seemed like he didn’t expect Lord Diavolo to ever approach you about the subject - he seemed pissed off. You took a deep breath and shoved the memories back down.
“Thank you.” Is that what he wanted to hear? His concerned smile looked genuine, and his apology sincere. But why did it feel like you couldn’t tell him what you really felt? By all means, he was royalty, but he wasn’t your ruler. Maybe it was because of how Lucifer treated him. He was clearly upset with him, yet he wasn’t expressing it. You wondered how he must’ve treated Michael - it’s no wonder Michael was so fond of him. And it’s no wonder why Michael would never treat you the same - you weren’t Lucifer and you would never be.
“So, MC, what did you want to talk about?” It felt silly asking for permission for something so trivial, especially in front of the future king.
“I just wanted to spend some time with Simeon and Luke. Over the weekend?”
“Is everything okay at the House of Lamentation?”
“Of course. I just think it would be good for me to be around them, too.”
“Well, I think it’s a wonderful idea.” You looked to Lucifer, you were asking him permission.
“You heard Lord Diavolo.”
“Thanks,” you told both of them. You left the room and waited right outside the door for Lucifer to be done with his meeting.
***
Lucifer had escorted you home to pack an overnight bag, and then brought you to the Purgatory Hall. Not much was said, both of you were in a bad mood due to the meeting. You said your goodbyes, and he reminded you to text him if you needed something. Walking inside, the presence was immediately different and it reminded you of home.
“Hey guys!”
“MC! I’m so glad you could come!” Luke rushed over to you - he was covered in flour.
“What are you doing, Luke?”
“I wanted to bake for you! And, since you’re close to Michael then you can tell me if it’s good enough to give him, too!” He urged you towards the kitchen; the countertops were filled with sweets of all sorts - it would be a dream come true for Beel.
“I wouldn’t say I’m close to Michael. He kind of just orders me around.”
“Ah, you’re so lucky you’re next in line to be an Archangel!”
You just nodded, and started taste testing. It was a huge honor, and almost never happened to angels. But even then, you didn’t feel lucky. Your path was forged for you, the sole reason for your existence was to take Lucifer’s spot, and for some reason that bothered you.
“Luke, are you done now?” You could hear Simeon call out from a different room.
“Yes! You can let him out now!” You gave Luke a questioning look. “Oh, Solomon’s not allowed in the kitchen when I’m baking.”
Simeon and Solomon both walked out of the room, and sat by you at the table.
“He likes to add his own flavors,” Simeon explained further. “It’s usually not very good tasting.”
“Ya know what? I’m offended,” Solomon feigned hurt. You giggled at their interaction. It had only been a short while, and they were all getting along so well. “So, did you get tired of being around the brothers already?”
“Well -” You’d be lying if you said you weren’t tired, but they weren’t exactly all that bad either. “Each one is just...a lot. There’s a lot of big personalities.”
“Yeah being around Asmo alone is a lot, I can’t imagine being around six more,” Solomon said half jokingly.
“Six?”
“Oh, right, five.”
“Luke, these treats are divine!” Simeon changed the subject quickly. Why did it feel like talking about the seventh brother was a crime?
“Yeah, I think Michael would like these.”
“Really?!” You just nodded and smiled. After all, you did come here to try to not think about the brothers.
The rest of the night consisted of dinner and watching movies until Luke and Solomon passed out. Simeon placed blankets on top of them and called you to his room. It was spacious, and had a couch in the corner.
“You can take the bed,” Simeon said as he started to prepare the couch to be slept on.
“What? No, I’m not taking your bed. I’ll sleep on the couch.”
“MC, it’s no big deal -”
“I don’t want to feel like a burden every time I come over.”
“You plan on coming here more often?”
“Well, only if I’m welcomed.”
“Of course you’re welcome.” You quickly laid on the couch, forcing him to go lay down on his bed. “Are you sure everything is okay?”
“Just a lot has happened in these few weeks.”
“You’re feeling new things...am I right?”
“Yeah. How did you know?”
“I volunteered Luke to be a part of this program - but don’t tell him, because he doesn’t know that.”
“Okay.”
“I did that because I think it’s important for young angels to see things from...a different perspective.” You nodded in agreement. “I see things differently because of the war. And because I wanted to see things differently.”
“What are you saying?” He hesitated for a moment, as if calculating his next words.
“All I’m saying is it’s not a bad thing to see the other side.”
You meditated on his words. He had known the brothers for a long time, so it made sense to have some sympathy over what happened; but why would you sympathize with all demons? How could you forgive any demon? The marks on your face was proof enough that they did bad things.
“Simeon?”
“Yeah?” He yawned.
“Do you ever feel like...like you don’t have your own life? Like, your purpose is someone else’s?”
No response. You turned your head to see Simeon fast asleep.
***
Simeon walked you back home. The walk was filled with small talk, and your stomach turned at the thought of being alone with the brothers once more. He must’ve seen the look on your face, and tried to reassure you.
“Just try to get to know them better. You should try to get to know Levi, too.”
“He’s always stuck in his room, how am I supposed to get to know him if I don’t know the secret phrase?”
“Secret phrase? Oh, yeah, I know it.” You laughed, thinking he was joking.
“Oh you’re serious? What is it?” He proceeded to tell you the password, and informed you that it was from TSL.
You gave him a hug goodbye. The shocked look on his face said it all.
“I’m sorry - I know we don’t do that - but wasn’t it nice?”
“It was, MC. I’ll see you later, okay?”
“Bye, Simeon.”
You walked into the house, and headed up the stairs to your room when you saw a wild Levi out in the open. Now was your chance, you knew you had to catch him now or never.
“Levi!”
“AH!” He shrieked and beelined to his room, dropping some snacks he was carrying.
“Wait!” You made it to his door just as he was closing it, and stuck your foot out to stop him from shutting it. “I know the secret phrase!”
“Ha! There’s no way a normie like you could know it!” You then repeated what Simeon just told you moments ago. Levi stopped trying to close the door, but barely opened it up, eyeing you instead.
“I just want to get to know you.”
“Why would you want to know a yucky otaku like me?”
“Well, I’m here for a year. And I’ve already talked to the rest of your brothers.”
Levi opened the door more, allowing you to step into the shadows of his room.
“Besides, what’s the worst that could happen?”
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After the Fall Tag List @ptv-hades
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dprwolfgang · 3 years
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Amigos Na’ Mas// Richard Camacho
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Credits to @cncodrip​ for the gif
I’m supposed to be doing pieces of my final year project but Yashel has been running circles in my mind and I’m really unmotivated to do school work so y’all enjoy my word vomit.
Richard Camacho x Niana (Reader)
In which Rich’s girlfriend calls him ‘a friend’ while doing a video for their Youtube channel and he gets pressed.
“This is gonna start a war and I don’t want any part of it.” Zabdiel says quickly dismissing her attempt at dragging him into the situation she was about to cause.
Giving up on Zabdiel she turns to her resident partner in crime who’s already sporting a devious smirk letting her know that he’s in on whatever she has planned.
+
“Rich, hurry up or I’m starting without you.” She yells at Richard who’s currently fixing his hair in the hallway mirror.
“Un momento mami.” He yells back and she playfully rolls her eyes at the camera that has already started recording.
It takes another ten minutes before the Dominican drops onto the seat beside her to get the video started. They do the intro to their video before Richard takes the lead.
“We’re gonna be doing a Q&A video today and let’s just say shit’s gonna get deep.”
Niana’s phone starts ringing before they even start answering any questions. She answers leaving Richard swaying left to right in his own little world.
“Hola, qué lo qué ? Nah I’m not doing anything too important right now. I’m just filming a video for my channel.” He doesn’t hear what the other person says but he just keeps making silly faces at the camera knowing they’d just edit it out later.  
“We can hang out later ‘cause I’m kinda with somebody right now…I’m with a friend.” When the last word clicks in Richard’s head, he pauses not thinking he heard her right before she repeats the phrase and his head snaps in her direction.  
“You know the one that I make YouTube videos with.” He sits up in his seat lightly tapping her shoulders to get her attention and gestures to himself. “Amigos?” He mouths at her.  
“Sí, estoy con uno de mis amigos.” She ignores him. He gestures for her to end the call but she carries on like he’s invisible.
“Lemme call you back later…no it’s not that big of a deal, my friend just wants to get on with the video…alright then, I’ll call you back later.”
“Quién era eso? Qué quieres decir con amigo?” He’s asking as soon as she hangs up.
“A friend.”
“Estás hablando de mí y de YouTube. No soy tu amigo, soy tu marido.” He says seriously.
“You’re my friend.” She replies pushing at his chest lightly but he isn’t amused.
“You could’ve said boyfriend or husband but I’m not your friend. El orden en el que usted ha dicho eso es erróneo. You’re supposed to say he’s my husband who’s also my friend. You’re not supposed to say he’s a friend.” He explains to her.
“Pero eso es lo quería decir. No creo que sea tan serio.We friends aren’t we?” She replies laughing lightly.
“What the fuck do you mean? Don’t play dumb with me. Who was that for you to even be calling me a friend?”  
“Before anything Yashel we’re friends,”
“See but what I’m saying is that’s that typical flirting line and don’t tell me it’s not cause I used to do that shit before we met.”
“But I wasn’t flirting though.” She counters.
“Yeah but you called me a friend so you clearly don’t want that individual to know that you have a man.”
“Are you hearing yourself?” She laughs. “We have a whole ass YouTube channel together and you think nobody don’t know I have a man?”
“Everybody don’t be watching YouTube much less our channel and not everyone that knows us watches our YouTube channel.” He retorts.
“I don’t get why you’re freaking out, you’re my friend and I have a bunch of other guy friends…”
“You can have your bunch of guy friends but you don’t put me in that category. I’m not your friend, I’m your fucking husband.” He’s trying his best to remain calm but her nonchalant attitude is agitating him.
“You are my husband but you’re also my best friend- ”
“What’s priority then?” He cuts her off. “I’m your husband first and your friend second.”
“Technically you were my friend before you became my husband.” She retorts leaning back in her seat.
“What’s the point in telling that person that I’m your friend?” He says with a bit of attitude.
“What’s the point in telling them that you my husband?” She replies with the same attitude and little neck roll.  
Richard pauses and looks at her. “Don’t look at me like that, answer the question.Because your intentions sound like you don’t want that person to know that you have a significant other and-”
“That is not my intention and you know it, you’re thinking way too into it.” Niana cuts him off scooting closer to him. “You thinking too much and we supposed to be doing a Q&A but you wanna be accusing me of shit.”
“We would be doing that Q&A if you weren’t out here getting calls and calling me a friend. That’s fucking suspicious Niana.”
“Why is that suspect?”
“Cause you’re acting guilty.”  
“Your eyes look suspect.” She claps her hands together then points at him. “The ones that be quick to accuse be the ones with shit to hide. Who are you to accuse people? Unless you’re Jesus baby don’t be judging nobody.”
“Stop tryna be funny and don’t be tryna swerve your way out of this. I’m serious, who the fuck was that?” Niana knows she’s probably taking it a little far but his reaction was funny to her.
“I’m not even tryna be funny Yashel, what’s funny about the situation?”
“It’s not funny but you’re acting guilty though.”  
“You’re being a bit ridiculous right now.”
“I’m not being ridiculous.”
“You are.”
They both go back and forth like little kids until Niana starts laughing.
“Why’d you say it like that though?” She asks referring to the way he told her she’s behaving ridiculous.
“Stop tryna make me laugh.”
“Por qué?” She pouts at him.
“Don’t look at me like that. No cute shit, it’s not gonna work.”  
“Beso.” She says leaning towards him smiling.
“No.”
“Beso, Beso Beso,” she chants moving closer to him.  
“No! Qué sentido tenía casarte conmigo si vas a decirle a la gente que soy amigo?” Richard questions feeling a bit insecure which was something he rarely ever felt with her.She never gave him reason to feel that way or to doubt her.
“You asked me to marry you.”
“Then why’d you accept?”
“For fun?” she laughs leaning on him.
“Fun? What the fuck?” He pushes her back by her shoulders lightly and stares at her.“I’m not playing with you…” he says as she picks up her phone.
“Call that person back and let them know that you have a husband.”  
“You’re so annoying.” She dials back the number and puts her phone  on loudspeaker as he speaks.  
“Hello.” The person answers and if he wasn’t feeling the way he was he would’ve immediately recognized the voice on the line but he doesn’t.
“Can you please get homie out of his feelings?” She asks laughing.
“Who’s homie?”
“Richard.”  
“Yo who the fuck is that?” Richard questions just as the person on the phone asks,“Who’s Richard?”
“Who do you think it is pendejo?” She laughs asking Richard.He takes her phone as the person asks who’s Richard again and it’s only then that the voice clicks in his head.
“Really? Erick?? Fuck you bro.”
“Yooo E, he got so pressed.” She laughs as Richard just keeps saying fuck you Erick.
“Ohh, you wanna say that in my house?” Erick questions and Richard suddenly remembers that they’re at his house.In less than ten seconds Erick’s standing in the doorway telling Richard to square up.
“Erick bro, I forgive you.”  
“You say fuck me but you forgive me? I didn’t even say anything.A formal apology should do, I’ll take twenty thousand dollars.” He laughs.
“I forgive you for the prank, you didn’t say anything but you willingly participated in her antics.” Erick just shakes his head laughing and goes back to the living room with Chris.
“So that was the content for the Q&A?” She turns to her.
“There was no Q&A baby,” she smiles kissing his cheek. “I just needed you here as payback for that last prank you pulled on me.
“Oh thank god, ain’t no way I was sitting through a Q&A video after that shit.” He sighs. “Thank you guys for watching this damned video, hope y’all had a good laugh,” he leans in close to Niana “and I hope you know that this means war.” He kisses her chastely before hopping up out his seat and out the door already plotting his revenge prank on her.
“Bring it on.” She says to the camera as she ends the video.
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crowdvscritic · 3 years
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round up // AUGUST 21
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Happy 2nd birthday to these Round Ups! For two years I’ve been making monthly pop culture picks, and they’ve included:
More than 200 movies
32 TV shows and specials, plus 8 different Saturday Night Live Round Ups
27 albums, singles, playlists, and more music picks
13 podcasts
12 books
2 concerts
There have also been articles, events, museums, social media bits, trailers, and a service that helps you find movies across streaming platforms. (Find all of them here.) This month I’m adding a few more, like: 
2 podcasts
2 albums
5 vampire movies
A conversation between two GOATs
A very funny dead guy
A terrifying Robert Mitchum performance
Another Dumb Rom-Com I Nevertheless Enjoyed
Here’s to another year!
August Crowd-Pleasers
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1. Jungle Cruise (2021)
Indiana Jones meets Pirates of the Caribbean with a dash of The African Queen. I like all those movies, so sue me, I had a nice time! Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10
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2. Deep Blue Sea (1999)
Genetically-enhanced sharks try to break free of their cages in an ocean research facility, chaos ensues for the characters, and it’s a delight for us. For no intelligent reason, I love movies that make me guess who’s going to get killed off next, so a big dumb shark movie starring L.L. Cool J and Samuel L. Jackson? It’s a particular brand of joy. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 5.5/10
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3. Double Feature — Adam Sandler Comedies: 50 First Dates (2004) + Murder Mystery (2019)
Adam Sandler movies are little like IcyHot for the brain—that is, they’re the relaxing kind of mind-numbing. Thanks to a stressful month at work, I watched six Sandler flicks in August—which I don’t necessarily recommend but also don’t regret—and the Netflix original Murder Mystery (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10) was one of the the best of the bunch. It’s a silly spoof of Agatha Christie’s work, and it’s a scenic two-hour European vacay. I also gave 50 First Dates (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10) another try and was pleasantly surprised. Once you get past some of the gross-out humor at the beginning, you’ll find a sweet story all about how we need to keep showing up for the people we love.
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4. Double Feature — SNL Comedies: Wayne’s World (1992) + Hot Rod (2007)
My love for Saturday Night Live is more than well-documented, so exactly zero mes were surprised that I loved these flicks from its alums. Wayne’s World (Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 7/10) follows up with Wayne and Garth in the basement we first saw on late night. Now they have the opportunity to make it big on TV thanks to a sleazy exec (Rob Lowe). Brian Doyle-Murray and Chris Farley show up, and so do Laverne and Shirley? Hot Rod (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10) follows Rod (Andy Samberg) as he tries to make it big as a stuntman and impress his stepdad (Ian McShane). Will Arnett, Bill Hader, and Chris Parnell show up, and now I can mostly forgive all those boys in high school who quoted this movie non-stop.
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5. Weekend at Bernie’s (1989)
If those SNL comedies weren’t enough silliness for you, how about you add some Bernie to your lineup? Andrew McCarthy and Jonathan Silverman are wannabe-yuppies who think they’ve got their  career breaks when an exec named Bernie invites them to his vacation home for the weekend. What they don’t know is that Bernie (Terry Kiser) has been laundering money, is connected to the mob, and, is now, um, dead. The right thing would be to call the police, but then we wouldn’t have a 97-minute high-concept comedy, now would we? Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 7/10
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6. Twilight series (2008-12)
I mostly skipped the Twilight phenomenon at its peak, but I’m so glad I hopped on the train years later—this series of vampire vs. werewolf showdowns are ridiculous.  But major kudos to the filmmakers who somehow turned a dump truck of nonsensical gobbledygook and unhealthy teenage relationships into something insanely watchable. Also, major kudos to Billy Burke and his understated, curmudgeonly, sarcastic performance. Bella’s dad is the MVP with the only appropriate responses to all of the nonsense he's forced to participate in and the only tether this franchise has to reality. Be sure to watch with a friend so you have someone else to process this weirdness with. Series Crowd: 8/10 // Series Critic: 5/10
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7. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers at The Muny
You know what’s great? Live theater! This month I made my first trip back to the stage at America’s oldest and largest outdoor amphitheater, the Muny in St. Louis. Their productions never disappoint, and these performers reminded me of Howard Keel, Jane Powell, and Russ Tamblyn in the best ways. 
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8. Wimbledon (2004)
Paul Bettany and Kirsten fall in love at Wimbledon! Frankly, that premise alone should be enough to sell you on this very winning rom-com. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7.5/10
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9. Career Opportunities (1991)
This month’s Dumb Rom-Com I Nevertheless Enjoyed! Frank Whaley and Jennifer Connelly fall in love while stuck overnight at a Target—which honestly sounds like a dream scenario—and since it’s a John Hughes script, it’s got some heart beneath its thin premise. John Hughes directing would’ve made it better, but there’s enough Hughes in there to catch my heart. Crowd: 7/10 // Critic: 4.5/10
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10. First Blood (1982)
Aka Rambo: Part I. Sylvester Stallone is a tough-as-nails Vietnam vet, and Brian Dennehy is the self-righteous sheriff who ticks him off. It digs a bit into PTSD and how we don’t take care of our veterans, but mostly, it’s just Stallone going ape with a knife and explosives. Oddly, also from the same director as Weekend at Bernie’s! Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7/10
August Critic Picks
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1. TCM’s The Plot Thickens Season 2 (2021)
You know those movies that make you ask, “How on Earth did this get made?” This season of The Plot Thickens, subtitled The Devil’s Candy, is an attempt to answer that question. Pretty much no one thinks 1990’s The Bonfire of the Vanities works as a film—including yours truly—and reporter Julie Salomon documented many of its production troubles leading to the final product. A must-listen for anyone who loves hearing behind-the-scenes stories or just gets a kick out of schadenfreude. 
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2. Gene and Roger (2021)
Gene and Roger, the summer series on The Big Picture podcast, is an overview and reflection on the work of Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert, starting with the launch of their individual careers in the ‘60s through their partnership that lasted into the ‘90s. Another must-listen for movie lovers, especially those who love digging into the history and criticism.
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3. Gold-Diggers Sound by Leon Bridges (2021)
Chill vibes and cool groves to transition you from Summer to Autumn.
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4. The Good, the Bad and the Ugly (1966)
Come for the Clint Eastwood, stay for the Ennio Morricone. Actually you can stay for Eastwood, too, because his humor is at his driest, and for Eli Wallach, whose Tuco is an insanely charming cockroach. It’s almost three hours, but this treasure hunt breezes by like a tumbleweed in the wind. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 9/10
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5. AFI’s Master Class - The Art of Collaboration: Steven Spielberg and John Williams (2011)
Two GOATS talking about making some of the GOATs. They share clips and explain their collaborative process (including on projects like Jaws and Schindler’s List), and they take questions from film students at AFI. I’m only wishing it were 10 hours instead of 1!
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6. The Night of the Hunter (1955)
Robert Mitchum’s terrifying preacher elevates this classic into more than just a standard crime thriller. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10
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7. Respect (2021)
While a few scenes indulge in melodrama, Jennifer Hudson’s killer performance—both in vocals and character work—more than makes up for it. This Aretha Franklin biopic hits the familiar beats, but it makes you feel like you’re in the room listening to Franklin sing , which is really all you want from a movie like this. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8/10
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8. Solar Power by Lorde (2021)
At first listen, this minimalist pop record sounds worlds away from the angst of Pure Heroine and the melodrama of Melodrama. At second listen, you realize it’s the Lorde you know and love, just with a Laurel Canyon influence. Carole King even gets a shout!
Also in August…
This month Kyla and I checked out Loveline, a call-in radio show popular during the run of Gilmore Girls.  Should our favorite Yale students give up dating OR call into the syndicated radio show Loveline? Should Dr. Drew Pinsky and Adam Carolla give strangers advice OR make fun of them? Oh, and Germany OR Florida? Listen to ep. 107 of SO IT’S A SHOW?
The '40s are coming! Reviews of 1940s Best Picture winners are on their way, and I kicked it off with an overview of the Academy that decade focusing on how they responded to World War II and their new prestigious reputation.
Photo credits: The Muny, The Plot Thickens, Gene and Roger, Leon Bridges, AFI, Lorde. All others IMDb.com.
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crazyyfilmyfreak · 4 years
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The Devil All the Time ( 2020 )
OBVIOUSLY SPOILERS FREE REVIEW
"There's a lot of no-good sons of bitches out there"
Okay alright first of all 
This is not your generic go-to netflix crime thriller if you are watching it with that intention everything is wrong with you 
This Film is dark , not just dark but dark as hell which is filled with gore elements which also includes a multi layered story telling and the film is filled with a group of astonishing cast members and every one of them has a potential to carry the whole film on their shoulders with no hard work but just with grace and ease so these reasons altogether might have over hyped few people's expectations and i think that is the main reason why i am seeing some mixed reviews here and there online or maybe just because you started watching this film with a very wrong intent or wrong mind set like i said before and i am stressing this so much because of in my opinion this film is just perfect maybe there are flaws obviously every film will have flaws but i just couldn't see them ? Maybe because i am a big fan of tom holland i might be little biased but to me this film is top notch and this is a perfect film film 
Now speaking about the cast & film overall 
This is a very slow paced slow burning piece of art 
It takes you to the places you can never think of mentally and it makes you feel completely lost in emotions by the end of the film making you numb 
Antonio Campos is a fucking genius i love his way of story telling 
He's honest , he knows what he is doing , he loves taking risks and he never fears when ever he goes out of the conventional film making style and i very much love how he connected every character in the film like i mean every character in the film is interconnected and if you remove any one character you will feel the void , disturbance and unbalance in the film. 
Film lovers might argue with me or hate me for saying this but i feel this film is so much better than christine 👀🤝🏻 atleast to me ? And this is coming from a person who also loved it a lot 
Now the cast 
I cant speak about everyone in the film because this has such a long list of talented actors 😭 who rocked in the film i am only going to speak abt some of my favourite performances as of now i promise to speak about every other cast member and their performance in the later days coz i am very sure this is a film i am going to talk a lot from now and this is also a film that i am going to watch and enjoy in the future days 
First TOM FUCKING HOLLAND 
I have been seeing this dude's films even before the civil war where he played the spidey role and i always felt he was a very raw and potential actor since his childhood but after seeing him in civil war and spider man hoco its just impossible for me to not like him as an actor ? HE IS SO GOOD ON SCREEN and he makes you believe everything when ever he's on screen maybe its swinging from wall to wall or putting a donut or whatever into a guys mouth while kicking his ass and making it look bad ass af🔥 few might feel this are such a silly examples to say but to me this is about how tom brings a realistic approach to a scene and makes it good and i have always been a big fan of tom holland since spiderman hoco and this is nothing related to tdat but y'all might already know timothee was the second closest option of mcu to cast as spidey and tom grabbed that role ever since tom is just busy with mcu films and where as timothee had a incredible and unbelievable growth as an ACTOR for real to me that is stunning because he did it in such short of span and to me as fan of tom holland part of me was always loving him as spidey but a big heart of me felt a void and sad because tom is missing a lot of great opportunities which has a chance to showcase his real acting abilities which made me think what if timothee got the spidey role instead of tom? Maybe we would have seen a serious tom holland as an actor and this thought killed me everytime but everything happens for a reason and tom holland is undoubtedly the best spidey we have ever got and anyways when films like tdat happen many people realise and understand how great and how fucking incredible tom holland is as an actor and i love when everyone appreciate him for this !! It makes my heart very happy and this is the exact reason why this film is so personal and special to me 
Sorry for completely deviating from the film but this is tumblr and i am not a serious film critic lol so forgive me. 
And speaking about his performance in the film he is just surreal and outstanding . The character that he played is a very complicated one not many relate to that character but every one can understand his emotions, actions and intentions in the film and all the credit goes to tom for bringing a life to that character and playing it in such a beautiful way listen to me very carefully when i am saying this not many actors from this generation can bring bundle of emotions at the same time in a same scene but tom holland does that with such an ease and i stg i am not exaggerating if you watch the film you will know what i mean !! And i am very proud to say i am his big fan 
Now Robbert pattinson 
What the fuck should i talk about this asshole 😂🖕? 
My dude's been killing it since remember me and as an actor like i said in the Tenet Review he has matured a lot as an actor since good time and he played a very powerful and sick role in the film i am not gonna spoil it for others just go and watch the fucking film atleast for him he did a great job and i dont understand how the women and gays are dealing with him? Seriously even as a straight guy its hard for me to concentrate on the film or scenes where ever he's present because this asshole is so fucking hot and sexy 👉👈 The directors should either deglamorise him by making him fat or bald or just hide his face with prosthetic make up or sth just like how directors hide tom hardy's face in every film he's in 🙄. Now coming back to his performance its really hard to dominate him when ever he's on screen dude just want all the attention towards him , such a selfish actor huh 
Bill Skarsgard 
He played a very important and crucial role in the film he maynot have big screen time but we can totally feel his presence through out the film i think this one sentence explains how important his character is to the film and how well he potrayed the role and he's the only guy in the film who got an incredible character growth throughout his journey in the film
Harry Melling 
It would be very unfair if i dont speak about harry's performance in tdat 
DUDE KILLED IT . HE SCARED ME WITH HIS EMOTIONS AND EXPRESSIONS . He didn't even a play a negative role but he just added a lot of depth not only to his character but also the film with his intimidating portrayal 
Sebastian stan 
This is the most honest and a very raw performance from Sebastian stan so far ( i am saying this based on the films that i have seen of his ) i just wish he had more screen time thats the only thing that i didnt like in the film also there are so many blanks that needs to be filled about his character 
Eliza Scanlen
I dont remember her from any film or tv series that i have seen before but she's outstanding in the film , the character doesnt have much something new to offer so i can't speak a lot for her but as far as the character concerned she did her best and her performance is a impressive one and many people are gonna love her . 
Riley Keough 
Unlike the previous films & tv series she's been in 
This film gave her a very challenging role and she's the only women in the film who's been through ups and downs and has a very complicated but a impressive character growth with minimal limitations and dimensions 
She was fabulous and incredible . It just stuns me how the character has begin and how it ended at the end 
And special mention to jason clarke and the old couple who played grandparents ( kind of ) to Arvin Russel and lenora . Not all heroes wear the cape. 
Finally despite the mention of god several times in the film this is not really about god at all its about the DEVIL , The DEMON that carries and plays a very pivotal role in the film you cannot see it but you can sense it and feel it 
Its about the blind faith, its about the irreversible & inescapable fate . I really love how Antonio Campos has connected all the dots by the end of the film with a very impressive film making and with a steady gothic theme running till the end internally and i haven't completely finished the book ( The devil all the time ) but if anyone really wants to completely bring the book life they cannot do it in a single film it will take you atleast 4 or 5 tv series to do so but Antonio Campos did it with a single film and added a very deep meaning to the core of the film w/o deviating from the roots of the book & even touched the aspects like duality of a man and some of you grateful fucks are complaining about him 
OBVIOUSLY films ard subjective but you all need to be more open about this film 
In simple words please fucking watch this film guys 🤗❤ 
This one is not for everyone but everyone will have atleast a small aspect in the film that y'all are going to like / love / hate / discuss about. 
The devil all the time is violent , brutal , honest and perfect in every possible way atleast to me and i really want you all to watch it if you're into such type of stuff 
Remember No country for old men ? Now make it 10 times more violent but add some meaning to it with a realistic approach but more slow burning drama and a little bit of darkness ... now that is what The Devil all the time is .
Gif credits : Milesgmorales
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medea10 · 3 years
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Medea’s Worst Year of All-Time Anime/Game Superlative
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Nobody saw this year coming…except for maybe Barbara Walters! Who could have predicted that this year would bless us with Australia burning, the entire west coast of the U.S. set on fire, stupid people setting fires because they wanted to reveal a baby’s gender, murder hornets, Ruth Bader Ginsburg dying, an almost war with Iran, serial killer mascots arrested, policemen killing unarmed black folks for having a counterfit $20, policemen killing unarmed black folks for breaking up a fight, policemen killing black folks for holding sandwiches, policemen killing unarmed black folks for fucking sleeping, a wide variety of “Karens” coming out of the woodworks, the end of Bojack, the end of Steven Universe, the end of Empire, and a pandemic so huge it’s killed the economy, canceled fun, and given the U.S. president the dumb-fuck idea of injecting bleach to kill the virus!?
SERIOUSLY, WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED ALL OF THIS WAS GOING TO FALL IN OUR LAPS LIKE HOT COFFEE ON THE CROTCH?!
At least there was anime this year.
At least there was SOME anime this year.
Biden won the election and Vickeblanca came out with Black Catcher this year.
Hey internet, it’s Medea here to give you her trashy opinion on this years anime and games that she’s watched or played. Because for some reason, my loser-ass loves to do out-dated as fuck memes! I shouldn’t complain, this shit brings a lot of attention to my page every year when I do this. Yes, 2020 was a complete dumpster fire so large that Domestic Girlfriend is crying foul. Many of us had to go on lockdown and ended up binge-watching the entire 957+ episodes of One Piece. I did no such thing. I am one of those “essential workers” so I didn’t hunker down for 9 months straight. But when I was home, I was watching anime. Actually, I would have done that even without the pandemic. I’m an introvert and find the human race to be deplorable.
You all know how this goes. I go over the best this year had to offer me. I had to search really hard to find the good in this year, especially in the anime world. Many things had to be put on hiatus or were delayed to a later date. Just a reminder, I don’t discriminate in what year the anime or game came out. If something came out in the happier times of 2007, that anime or game counts! Let’s get at it!
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First Fandom of 2020: Interspecies Reviewers
Did anyone expect a fan-favorite of 2020 was going to be a hentai? Did anyone have on their batshit 2020 bingo card that a hentai was going to grab everybody’s attention? At the beginning of the year, my mind was set on the Railgun sequel and Eizoken. It wasn’t until licensors, streaming sites, and TV stations in Japan dropped this series that I started to pay attention. And got immediately hooked! It’s about three men going to different brothels and reviewing their time with the ladies. And these ladies are of different species! So with every bang comes possible enlightenment, new kinks, or a night of having your dick sucked off more than humanly possible. This anime blew away all of my skepticism and first impressions right out the window. Maybe it’s because I’m a degenerate and am often curious about sexual content, but this was a guilty pleasure of mine this year.
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Favorite Main Character of 2020: Moroha from Yashahime
I know the majority of this story is going to revolve around Towa and Setsuna, but can we please focus a little more energy on the spunky, quarter-demon girl?! I know they’re pitting Moroha as the comic relief, but I’m hopeful that she’s going to surprise us one day. We fans of InuYasha would spend the past decade and some change wondering what InuYasha and Kagome’s daughter would be like. This year, we got our answer with Moroha. She’s got this wild side to her, probably due to the fact that she’s spent her entire life on her own. And while she’s silly at times, she can get down to business in a pinch. She has her father’s sense of smell. She has a sword. She’s able to shoot sacred arrows much like her mother. And to top it all off, she has this special rouge that if she puts it on, she’s able to unleash that ¼ demon power inside her and become Beniyasha! Yeah, I know the power only lasts a minute, she’s only 14, give her a break! I will gladly go through another week scratching my head at the confusion this story gives me if I get to see one more second of Moroha and her crazy antics or her bad-ass slaying.
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Favorite Villain of 2020: The Devil Believers from Black Clover
This was one hell of a year for Black Clover. It would have been an easy choice to pick the devil and possible super devil that appeared during the elf fight. But I’d like to give a nod to the filler arc villains. And you can’t blame this group for wanting the power of the devil. They’re literally the bottom-rung of the Clover Kingdom and ones with little to no power or mana. So I can agree with why they would want the power of the devil. For one thing, they’d have more power. And for another thing, they’d be able to exact revenge on those who have wronged them. On some occasions I agree with exacting revenge and when it comes to the nobles and some characters in Black Clover, some folks do deserve death. I mean, have you met the king of the Clover Kingdom? Plus, this town and many other poorer towns get looked over by the kingdom. Peasant uprise! Anyways, I thought these people were really crafty in their crimes. I mean, they were able to knock Asta out on his ass with specially made poisons. I was actually hooked to this story of Black Clover (despite it being a filler arc). I know we’ll never see them again as they have been exiled, but it did have me semi-rooting for them.
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Favorite Video Game Character of 2020: Honey from Pokemon – Sword & Shield (Expansion Pass)
Sorry Raymond from Animal Crossing!
Honey is the saucy wife of Mustard…I did not expect that to come out the way it did, but here we are! She has one hell of a team you can fight once a day. She looks out for her husband, the dojo, and the students of the dojo like they were her own children by providing food, drinks, and others. However that does come at a price as you do have to give up a sizable chunk of your watts that you collect in raid dens. I’m sure a bunch of MILF chasers were more than happy enough to give her all their hard-earned watts just so they can have their one-on-one moment on the beach with Honey.
What won me over was when that one guy from a rival dojo bad-mouthed her husband’s dojo and she…I think she kicked this guy’s ass herself. I don’t think she used any of her pokemon. Game Freak won’t show it, but we all know she kicked this guy’s ass to a point where he’s begging for mercy.
Honey, for the win!
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Favorite Game of 2020: Animal Crossing New Horizons
This game was just Zen for me. I know the release of this game came with some controversy like Gamestop saying it’s an essential business and will remain open for people to get their copies of the game. Hell, I was one of those assholes in line waiting to get a copy on March 20th. Did I predict that a pandemic was going to rage out of control when I got a prepay copy of this for Christmas 2019? NO! I only predict political things, not deadly pandemics! The good news, we social distanced, didn’t catch the covid and got the game.
Anyways, this game has been a non-stop calming and fun ride. I can even forgive their botch-up of Bunny Day. They even have events for holidays I never thought they would ever touch. I mean, does anybody know when Museum Day is? Probably not until Animal Crossing had an event for it! I’ve been able to let my freak-flag fly with designing my island. And this goes way beyond New Leaf for the 3DS. I can make a sign post with the words “Fuck Trump” on it and post it in my yard. I can dig up trees and plant them elsewhere. I can poop in a toilet. I can craft furniture and put my own design on it. My furniture can have Tracey Sketchit’s beautiful mug on it. I can sit on Tracey Sketchit’s face. I am a sick fuck and I don’t care. I can give Raymond and Bob maid outfits. Magical time in my game! My hopes for next year…I don’t know, get the Festivale furniture, get Papi and Olivia to join my island, maybe visit Danny Trejo’s island, who knows, sky’s da limit!
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Favorite Het Couple of 2020: Nasa and Tsukasa Yuzaki from Tonikawa
This is one of the most unorthodox marriages I’ve ever seen. But in this 90 Day Fiance world we’re living in, I shouldn’t pass judgement on these two getting married in episode one and not knowing much about each other. Nasa meets Tsukasa as he was about to be plowed by a truck. Tsukasa saves his life. Nasa says she’s beautiful. Tsukasa says she’ll be his girlfriend if they get married. He agrees. She disappears. Four years later, Tsukasa appears in front of Nasa’s front door with a marriage registration form. Congratulations buddy, you’ve got yourself a waifu! In some way, this felt like watching Yamato and Takeo from My Love Story. I was fascinated with them progressing through their relationship. The only difference is that Yamato and Takeo took the old-fashioned route. This couple did everything ass-backwards in terms of having a relationship. But I couldn’t take my eyes off Nasa and Tsukasa’s relationship during each episode. I find them cute.
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Favorite Yuri Couple of 2020: Karin Asaka x Emma Verde from Love Live Nijigasaki High School Idol Club
AAAAAAAAAH! I’M IN IDOL HELL AGAIN! Yeah, no kidding! I came this close to putting Miu x Nicole from that abomination 22/7. But thank God for Love Live! There’s no telling if any of the girls from the Love Live franchise are confirmed to be lesbians. But fuck it, all of them attend all-girl schools, no males exist anywhere, and Sunshine gave us Kanan x Mari! Yeah, you know Kanan and Mari is canon as fuck, don’t at me. So naturally, I found more third-years to ship in the new Love Live series. Now I know I should have put up Ai x Rina or Ayumu x Yuu. Especially the latter due to recent events! But Emma x Karin is my OTP.
Now Emma is an exchange student from Switzerland and in coming to Nijigasaki, she first meets Karin and they became instant friends. When Emma said she wants to become an idol, Karin helped her quite a bit. Even though Karin had no interest in being an idol as her modeling career is starting up, Karin would occasionally help Emma out. And surprise, surprise, Karin ends up fascinated with the idol world and Emma helps her come to the light to be herself there. Okay, I’m totally reading this in some fragmented way, but I’m currently playing Love Live School Idol Festival All Stars and the app game has a lot more stuff involving stuff the anime has yet to talk about. Confirmed or not, Karin x Emma for the win!
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Favorite Yaoi Couple of 2020: Eiji Okumura x Ash Lynx from Banana Fish
It took me a while to get here, but I finally made it to 2018’s overlooked gem. Forgive me for not being fully caught up, but from what I’m watching at the moment, I’m sticking to my guns and supporting the hell out of this. I mean, I could have mentioned The Titan’s Bride here…but fuck no, I ain’t goin’ down that mess! Ash has gone through a lot, I mean a helluva lot in his past. His cute boy looks have made him a target on the streets of New York, with mafia dons, and with prison inmates. But dude can kill if you mess with him. Then you have Eiji, who is just a literal example of a “pure cinnamon roll (until episode 8)”. These two are as opposite as you can possibly get. Ash is from New York and Eiji is from Japan. Ash likes hot dogs with everything on it. Eiji likes grilled fish and natto. Ash spent the majority of his life killing on the streets. Eiji was a track superstar. You get my meaning. But when we got these two together it’s quite adorable. Ash is really able to change when he’s around Eiji. Ash isn’t some heartless killer on the street about to kill a thug with prosthetic fingers. When he’s with Eiji, he’s a joker that can easily get scared of pumpkins. And even in later episodes, you got these two acting like a husband and wife.
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Fandom That You Didn’t Expect to Get Into: Les Miserables – A Girl Named Cosette
Let me explain a little something. Les Mis! I have never seen the play, watched the movie, or read the novel prior to picking up this anime. Not a single one of those! And that’s a bit of a head-scratcher when you realize I was a bit of a musical theater nut in my teenage years. But one thing I do like is when Japan does an anime based on plays or historical events (like Romeo x Juliet or Rose of Versailles). The second I popped in Les Miserables the anime, I wanted to binge watch the whole 52 episode series. It is by no means a perfect adaptation of the Victor Hugo novel. Several key players end up surviving all the way up to the end of the story! But because this was my very first viewing of anything Les Mis, I took to the story of Cosette and was eager to see what was going to happen next in her tale. Unlike the movies and play, Cosette was the main focus of the story besides Jean Valjean and Javert. And thanks to watching the unfortunate stories of Cosette, Jean Valjean, the Thenadiers, Javert, Marius, and the rest, I thought it was time to watch the OTHER adaptations to Les Mis.
Russell Crowe sucks.
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Fandom That Made An Unexpected Comeback: Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni
Higurashi or When They Cry is one of my favorite fandoms of all time! So naturally when we heard that it was making a comeback, I was excited. It was also very odd that Higurashi was given this sequel or reboot. Ahem! There’s another franchise that needs a face-lift. Umineko still deserves a better treatment. Plus, now that this series was out of the faulty hands of Studio Deen, Higurashi will get the special care it deserves. Believe it or not, it wasn’t just the anime that made a comeback for me, but the manga as well. Since 2009, I’ve read several volumes (out of order) and would every now and then come back to read the story. Back to the anime, this reboot or sequel…you know what, I’m gonna call it a “rebooqual”! This rebooqual sucked me back to the town of Hinamizawa and all the murders. Every week, I find myself comparing the current episode to one from the 2006 version. But then the fourth episode of each arc seems to catch me off guard.
Where are they going with this story and these twist endings to our favorite arcs? I did not expect Rena to turn a simple attempted murder into the end of School Days! I didn’t expect Rika to die in the most disgusting fashion they could think of. Could someone kill Teppei fucking Hojo? I will pay ¥5000 for someone to do that job. So yeah, because I know how much of this plays out and who does what, I’m usually watching and reading while making wise-ass remarks. But I still have fun with it.
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Fandom That Inspired the Most Crack: Konosuba
In a year where I caught up with the popular Isekais like Shield Hero and Re:Zero, I found the wacky misadventures of Kazuma Satou to be amusing as all get-out. From the first 5 minutes, I found myself laughing at Kazuma’s misfortune. Seriously, how the fuck do you mistake a tractor for a car, have a heart attack, piss yourself, and fucking die in the first couple minutes to the series? You can only get away with this shit in gag animes! But it’s not just Kazuma’s dumbass, there’s a mage who only does explosions, but loses all her energy after one blow-up. Then there’s a busty, blonde who gets turned on by getting hurt and can’t strike anything with her sword. Anime’s biggest masochist or Cheryl Tunt incarnate, I haven’t decided which one to believe! Then you have this loud, crazy goddess chick named Aqua. She’s also useless about 86% of the time! Watching their unfortunate missions is all the crack that I need to get through this year. Seriously, Darkness is just all kinds of fucked up, but we love her.
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Last Fandom of 2020: Yashahime
That’s right, the InuYasha sequel gets top spot here! Even though week after week I find myself asking more questions than when the episode started, I’m still hooked. If you’re like me, you watched and fell in love with the series InuYasha. So if they’re doing a sequel, you’re expecting to see all of your favorite characters from the prequel like InuYasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Sesshomaru, Koga, Rin, and the rest. Actually, no! Quite the opposite! We’ve got Sesshomaru’s daughters, but no Sesshomaru. Rin is sleeping in a tree we think! We’ve got InuYasha and Kagome’s daughter, but they’re M.I.A. None of the girls even know a thing about their birth parents.
Now are these new characters a catch like the ones from the previous series? Some are! The three main girls, yes! Especially Moroha! I’ve already praised her name earlier in the superlative. Towa and Setsuna do take on some personality traits from their parents. Setsuna is definitely serious like Sesshomaru and Towa sometimes has a carefree yet loyal aura to her like Rin. I know I’m always skeptical when a series gives us a sequel featuring the offspring of the main characters. Especially when you’ve got some lame examples like Boruto and Eureka Seven AO (I might retract my diss on Boruto later)! As each week gives us a new episode, we’re unraveling new clues into a lot of things involving our old favorite characters, as well as the new ones. So I have high hopes for Yashahime for the time being!
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bbparker · 5 years
Text
Infinity (Bucky Barnes x Reader)
The Reason Tim Halperin & Infinity by James Young the main influences for this fic!
SPOILERS FOR ENDGAME AHEAD
A/N: welcome back! I absolutely love this and I hope you’re all enjoy it too!
MASTERLIST 
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2ND WARNING: SPOILERS AHEAD 
Steve stood amongst the bushes, watching as Bruce adjusted and checked over the machinery responsible for taking him back in time to return the stones. His gaze then moved over to the smiling face of his best friend Bucky Barnes and (y/n) (y/l/n). 
Ever since he has introduced the two of them during the events of the civil war, they were inseparable and it broke his heart to watch (y/n) fall apart as she lost him five years ago. (y/n) even came to Wakanda to help him, talking, rehabilitation; hell, she even stayed on the farm with him. 
When he had reappeared, It was almost like the life had come back to her face every time her eyes glanced up at the man. 
Steve sighed and finished adjusting his gloves. He knew going back into the past and staying there was going to be harsh on her but this was it for him. 
Steve had served in four wars, and many more battles. It was time for him to try some of that freedom that he’d fought so hard for. 
Moving towards the machine, Bruce handed Steve the case containing the infinity stones. 
“You know, I could come with you.” Sam Wilson offered, smiling gently. Steve declined and hugged the man, hopefully pouring all his emotions into the one act. Something Sam definitely picked up but didn’t question. 
Looking to (y/n), he laughed at her overly bright smile.
“Well, Rogers, off into the unknown once again. I’d say don’t get into trouble but we know you’re a magnet for it.” Laughing, Steve brought her in for a hug, slightly stroking her hair in a brotherly fashion. Pulling away, he looked right into her eyes with a tone of sadness. 
“You know, ever since I met you when I first got out of that damn ice, you’ve been one of my best friends. I couldn’t have asked for a more compassionate, kind, and strong partner in crime, or the sister I never had. Just take care of him while I’m gone.” Both parties looked over the Bucky, who pretended not to listen in with his super hearing by looking around and fiddling with a tree bark awkwardly.
They chuckled at the obvious demeanour which was quite humorous for a world-renowned assassin. Upon recognising his tone, (y/n) frowned and returned to her friend. 
“Steve, why does it sound like you’re saying goodbye? It’s like a five minute journey.”
“But a long, long time for me.” She was suspicious but trusted him and in turn, wrapped her arms around his waist once again. 
“Thank you Steve, I’ll see you soon.” (y/n) thought she heard a sniff but as she allowed him to move from her grasp, she saw no traces of emotion.
Steve finally approached Bucky with a soft smile as (y/n) turned to talk to Sam and give the two best friends their privacy. 
“You gonna be okay?” Bucky began watching as Steve glanced around him before allowing his eyes to rest on the soldier. In one look, Steve knew he knew about his plan.
“I think I should be asking you that, Buck.” The brunette man looked towards the smiling girl he had yet to ask out; a soft smile on his face.
“Yeah… I think I will be. I mean 100 years of fighting peoples wars, we deserve a life with the people we love.” Bucky clasped a hand on his friends shoulder.
“Are you going to tell her?” Both men glanced over as the woman now fiddling with the controls as Bruce attempted to swat her away without accidentally hulk-launching her across the floor, resulting in a pout from her. They chuckled at her silly antics, turning to each other once more. 
“Yeah, I think I will. (Y/N)’s waited a long time for me… and she’s the one, Steve.” Steve watched as the playboy he knew from Brooklyn became the one with the stolen heart for once. They heard a small scream and watched as (y/n) was launched a small distance into the air and away from the equipment. 
Bucky winced slightly, watching the enhanced girl stand up again, unharmed and brush the dirt off. 
“I’m okay guys.” (y/n) huffed laughing slightly when she noticed the men looking at her. One with a proud smile as she stood tall and the other with a brotherly smirk as he observed the pair. 
“But I think I should be wishing you the best of luck with that one. Energetic, sarcastic and just a hint of crazy. She’s perfect for you.” Bucky laughed, punching Steve in the arm as (y/n) marched past them to lecture Bruce about throwing a person just because they annoy you. Steve continued, while Bucky lingering gaze remained on (y/n) before returning to his friend.
“But take my advice and experience on waiting too long… go get your girl. ” Steve gave his friend a wide smile.
“I’m just lucky to have her in the here and now after everything.” Steve seemed to look at Bucky with a nostalgic smile, him having said something similar about Peggy.  
“But you’re leaving as well Steve and honestly that’s okay. We’ll be okay.”
“I know.” Bucky and Steve laughed as they watched (y/n) get thrown for the second time. Their deep chuckles catching the attention of (y/n), who peered over from the floor. Upon catching Bucky’s eyes she began blushing, tucking hair behind her ear. 
Steve looked back to Bucky, observing his laughing face and the small details of everything that is him; ingraining them in his mind.
Yes, Bucky would be just fine without him.
“Don’t do anything stupid until I come back.” Steve said suddenly as he brought Bucky into his arms, both men hugging for what they knew might be the last time. 
“How can I? You’re taking all the stupid with you.” Steve gave a small laugh and shook his head as he walked up the steps to the machine. As his helmet covered his face, his eyes watched as his best friend was approached by (y/n). 
Bucky looked down at her softly as she began talking to him gently and slipping her hand into his human one easily. Bucky smiled once more. It was the happiest Steve had seen him in years. The smile was then turned to him along with a small nod. 
Taking a breath, Steve was then transported into the past.
“How long is this supposed to take again?” Sam asked as he crossed his arms. 
“At least some of us listen, Sam. It could be near months for him but for us it’ll be seconds.” (y/n) scoffed before smiling at her friend as he jokingly scowled back at her. Hearing Bruce countdown until Steve’s return, (y/n) became nervous, something felt off.
Bucky nervously fidgeted, the air felt tense and (y/n) had a warning in her gut.
Steve was coming back, right?
Upon feeling her hand being lightly squeezed, (y/n) glanced to her side to see Bucky peering down at her with that soft face he always had when he looked at her.
“(Y/n), I hope you can forgive me for not telling you.” But this wasn’t the face she was expecting when he was going to ask her out, this was one of regret. 
“Telling me what?” The sounds of Bruce and Sam panicking brought her attention back to the situation.
“Bring him back!”
“I’m trying but he didn’t meet the scheduled time point!” (y/n)’s eyes widened as she became furious, understanding immediately. Bucky knew and he didn’t even allow her to say a proper goodbye. Ripping her hand from his, she turned towards him ready to attack but when her eyes met the blue of his, she couldn’t. 
Bucky, though showered and refreshed, still looked battle worn. He and Steve had been fighting all their lives, it wasn’t right to say they couldn’t have a happy ending because she wanted them there; they deserved it. 
Bucky’s eyes looked pained as they watched her anger direct towards him before falling flat. He’d never seen those expressions directed towards him and he’s be lying if he said he wasn’t a little bit frightened. 
What if she walked away? What if she never wanted to see him again?
Her eyes, however, moved over his shoulder as a new figure appeared. 
“Sam.” She gasped out, Bucky turning to look at the small figure in the distance. Sam walked past the pair, (y/n) about to follow suit before she felt Bucky grasp her hand gently, allowing her to leave if she wished. 
“Wait, (y/n).” Bucky spoke, nervous. 
“I get it.” She said softly, watching as Steve and Sam talked. Bucky was surprised by the mild tone and held her hand a little more confidently. However, (y/n) released his hand and walked down the small slope to her mentor, her friend and brother of many years.
Bucky let her go, knowing this is what (y/n) needed and if she wanted, he would still be here, waiting for her. 
Passing Sam, now holding Steve’s shield, (Y/N) approached tentatively. As she rounded around the bench, her eyes never left Steve.
“S-steve?” (y/n) asked, sight tears building in her eyes as she looked down as what used to be one of the strongest men she knew. Now reduced to a frail old man with a small frame.
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“(Y/N), its good to see you after so many years.” Slowly sitting down, (y/n) never took her eyes off of him as she observed him. 
“Well, it was like five minutes ago for me and I have to say Steve, that five minutes of time were not good to you.” Steve released a hearty laugh, a hand placed on his chest as he leant back slightly. The laughter lasted longer than usual and (y/n) became worried.
“Stop laughing Steve! You’re going to give yourself a heart attack or somethin’!” Her eyes were wide and Steve’s laugh grew louder. This continued for another minute or two before the older man was able to calm down and wipe his eyes.
“Yes, well its been well over five minutes for me. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you but-”
“It was time to move on. I know.” Steve seemed surprised by (y/n)’s lack of anger at him for leaving her. Leaning back on the bench as she turned to look at the sunset, sighing. 
“Steve, I’ve known for a while that your time with us was limited. No matter who said it- Fury, Ultron, HYDRA, S.H.I.E.L.D- you were not made to be a soldier forever.” Steve said nothing as he watched her with a surprised expression.
“But the tin can was right in Sokovia about one thing. Things are beautiful because they are apart of a temporary moment in time. It makes you treasure the things you had.”
“Or could have?” Steve smiled secretly at her, glancing behind her to the long haired man. 
“Have you been waiting, like, 60 years to say that to me?” (y/n) gave a humorous smile, looking at the best friend she’d ever had.
“Would you laugh if I said yes?” (y/n), of course, laughed, catching the attention of Bucky. Steve didn’t miss his sudden attention on (y/n) either. 
“Thank you Steve. You rescued me from more than you’ll ever know but I wanted you to know that I’ll be okay. I’m happy you went back to her- to Peggy. She was the one for you, I know.” Steve seemed surprised yet again but covered it with a smile. Reaching into his pocket, Steve pulled out a long strands of metal. 
“I knew you were too smart for your own good.” Steve laughed as a small blush came to his cheeks. (y/n) couldn’t believe after all these years he was still blushing over Peggy Carter.
“I wanted to repay you for being by my side all these years, but I couldn’t think of anything in all honesty, that could possibly measure to that. That was until I was digging through some boxes and found these.” Steve opened his hand and inside of it was his and Bucky’s dog tags from the war. 
“Steve i-i cant take these. Thats between you a-and Bucky! I could never.”
“You can and you will. My time may be coming to a close but James’ isn’t. He has a future here, in this time and with the Avengers.” Steve smiled softly and grabbed her hand, placing them in her smaller ones. 
“With you.” Steve finished. (Y/N) didn’t respond. Instead she launched at Steve and wrapped her arms around him for the final time- the tags still wrapped in her palm. 
Lastly, it was Bucky's turn to chat to Steve but it seemed all had been said and their meeting was brief before Steve walked away one final time, a simple pat on the shoulder for Bucky. By this time, night had fallen and the only thing to light up the forest were the moon and the stars. 
Bucky stood up from the bench and turned to leave after watching the last piece of his past walking away, only to find his future standing and looking back at him. 
Slowly she approached, the light of the moon and stars gracing her face delicately as Bucky marvelled in it. 
“I know it’s taken me awhile and i’m so sorry for making you wait. But I’m thankful you did bec-” (y/n) covered his mouth with her hand, smiling, as Bucky attempted to launch into some kind of love confession. She had a much better way to go about it. 
Slowly, her other hand unraveled to reveal a necklace and held it out to Bucky. Looking down his eyes widened at the two thin metal plates. (Y/N) then removed her hand from his mouth, allowing her to see his slightly gaped mouth.
“Doll, where-where did you get it from?” Bucky was slightly choked up as his human hand came up, fingers gliding over the necklace gently. 
“They’re yours if you want them… just like me. Steve gave these to me and while I am admittedly keeping yours, it would be wrong not to give you something of his; of your past. Some stories are have come to an end but I can’t help but feel you and I have got a lot of chapters to write.” Bucky’s heart hammered as (y/n) moved just a tad closer, her words swirling around his head.
Looking down slightly, he caught sight of his own dog tag around her neck, the other plate having been lost during the war. His mouth continued to gape slightly, somewhat enjoying having her wear something that belonged to him. Bucky’s dog tags where a symbol of his past and in a way, her saying she was accepting him.
Now she was asking if he’ll accept Steve as a part of his past and her, his future. 
“Well, I always did love finding out about the future.” Carefully, he picked up the tags from her hand and clasped them around his neck. His eyes moved from his chest to the woman so close to him, he could smell her perfume. 
“Then let me start by saying I am so in love with you Barnes and I have been waiting five god damn years to tell you.” As her hands came to reach either side of his cheeks, Bucky finally gave a smile. (y/n) began leaning, bringing her face ever closer to his. 
His smile lit up her world as blue eyes watched her with all the adoration she could possibly imagine. Bucky’s hands came to lay on her waist, having a tight hold as he pulled her closer to him. 
“Well then miss (y/n), I apologise for being late again, its a habit.” In a single defining moment, (y/n)’s lips met his and his grip tightened and brought her impossibly closer. As (y/n) pulled away for air, he followed to reconnect them as they broke and fell back together over and over.
When they finally came apart one last time, Bucky looked down to his love to find tears slowly falling down her cheeks as they sparkled in the moonlight. He was in awe and for that moment he didn’t know what to say, until her eyes met his.
“I love you, (y/n), and I’ll never stop.”
“Thats a big promise Barnes, are you sure about that?” He simply kissed her again as he repeated his reply in his head like a prayer.
For Infinity.
Because, while to others this was the endgame, for them, it was just the start. They knew they belonged by each others side. 
With nothing but the stars as their witness, love tainted by time and tragedy became so much more. 
Soulmates bound by fate. 
5 YEARS LATER
“After that, we simply went back to rebuilding. We couldn’t re-make the compound where it was, it didn’t feel right. Instead we turned it into a memorial for Tony, Steve- the Avengers and all those lost in those years.” Her legs dangled over the edge of the dock, her bare toes skimming the clear water.
“Instead we moved the next block over.” (y/n) stopped to laugh somewhat sadly. 
“We rebuilt and brought in some new heroes. Johnny Storm’s a character, thats for sure, but his presence is somewhat relieving, calming even. For the life of me I cant figure out why.” The face of the spoken man entered her head before quickly fading away.
“Anyways, I can’t say it hasn’t been an interesting few years, little guy. I of course miss Steve and Tony like nothing else but we all knew what we were doing when we went into that war. It was all or nothing.” (y/n) looked across the water to spot the only other house in the area, a now slightly older girl running around the lawn as her mum chased her. 
“I’m so proud of where we are. I couldn’t have been happier. We made sacrifices that left scars but if you had to ask me to do it again, I would. If it lead to here, I would choose the same every time.” Hearing a splash and loud protesting, (y/n) glanced over to see Sam laughing, holding a fishing rod as a very drenched Bucky stood out of the water, glaring.
(Y/N) giggled as she watched her husband and best friend trying to relax while not on a mission.
“Though he’ll never admit it, he’s still struggling a little without Steve. Bucky loved Stevie, its been ingrained in him from the moment they met. Side by side through day and night. But he’s getting there, slowly.” (Y/n) watched with slightly tired eyes as Bucky accepted his newly wet state and began to swim towards her.
“Ah, he’s come to release us from thinking too much.”
As he got within hearing distance, (y/n) playfully narrowed her eyes.
“Im not joining you, if thats what you were counting on.” (y/n) raised a teasing eyebrow as Bucky made it to the dock. Putting a hand on either side of her legs, he lifted himself out of the water and delivered a kiss right to her lips.  As he drew back slightly, (y/n) followed and gave another. 
Bucky’s heart still stutters at the sight and feel of her, even after all these years. Smiling widely up at the love of his life, he plants small kisses along her cheeks before ducking back into the water, splashing her slightly. Then he popped up and pulled himself to be sitting next to her, drenching her outfit slightly. 
“Buck! You know how hard it is for me to stand let alone change; now I’m fat, slow AND drenched.” He let out a chuckle, allowing his hand to come to her stomach, where their future sat.
“You are not fat. Pregnant doesn’t count as fat.” Looking up at him (y/n) thanked to the gods for him and his gorgeous state. He was drenched and long dark hair was slightly hanging around his face, framing bright blue eyes that were looking at her stomach in wonder.
“Have you seen my feet? You could use them as boats at this stage.” Looking down a frown came to Bucky’s face as his eyebrows rose, trying to come up with something for her swollen feet.
“I uh, love boats?” He tried only to be pushed by (y/n) who was giggling. 
“I think I know what we should call him.” She said suddenly, Bucky’s smile softening as he watched her look out at the water. 
“George.” Bucky’s smile widened as his hand came back to rest on her stomach. 
“After my dad? Thats nice. What about the middle name?” (Y/n) looked up at him through her lashes. 
“I thought I would let you choose.” (y/n) rested her hand on his cheek gently while he struggled with the intense emotions from the moment. Bucky, while much better than he used to be, was still quite new to this life of playing house and often found himself getting choked up about it. 
“How… how about, uh.” (Y/N) stoked his cheek as she watched him struggle and admired him all over again. She was patient as she watched his eyes dart around, watery eyes trying to keep the droplets from falling. 
He was battling with himself and didn’t want to get it wrong.
“Steven.” Bucky suddenly, making (y/n) jump a little. Her eyes began to water slightly as she smiled. Looking back at where Sam was entering her and Bucky’s house, she tried to calm her own raging emotions. Turning her face back to the love of her life, she managed a sarcastic smile. 
“After Captain America? The guy in the uniform?” Laughing slightly, Bucky shook his head and took her wrist in his hand before placing a kiss on her palm. Brining it back to his cheek, Bucky smiled once more.
“No, that little guy from Brooklyn who was too dumb not to run away from a fight. Heard of him?”
“I might have heard it mentioned somewhere.” Bucky’s eyes show a spark of happiness as they laugh fondly together at the end of their dock.  
Over the water, a one Pepper Potts watched the scene with both happiness and longing. Indeed it had been an interesting journey. 
-------------------------------------
MASTERLIST
HERE LIES MY SOUL AFTER THIS AND IN MEMORIAM TO:
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TAGS:
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fsketchart · 5 years
Text
A Second Chance - Chapter 3
I'm so sorry for the wait but here's a summary of the sections.
[Advertisement Voice]
WELCOME! Over here to the left we have a heartfelt battle between Evillustrator and a group of rebels. Will Marc's feelings for Nathaniel get in the way, or will he get the job done?
On the right here, we have the latest new Batman vs Superman argument that just came in. It's a limited addition and includes a bonus Wonder Women add on to the set.
Now, we just recently added a new product onto the shelves, including a misunderstanding, panic, and an argument that is an partner set to the previous.
Let's see if first impressions really do stick.
Au Created by @ozmav​
NOTES : 
Thank you so much for the lovely feedback, I truly do appreciate all of the love and support this fic has gotten so far, it absolutely blows my mind that I've gotten so much feedback from this. This chapter in particular is almost 3000 words, sorry if it's a bit long. It was definitely longer than I was intending it to be, but I think it turned out for the best. Also, apologies if there are any errors in here. I'll be going back in later to double check and proofread it. If you catch any errors grammatically, feel free to let me know!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Please...Nathaniel don’t do this.  I know you have to be in there!” Marc cried, hands trembling as his knees felt numb.
“That’s Evillustrator to you.  What we had was nice Marc, but if you truly cared you would want me to be happy.  I finally feel at peace, I can draw to my hearts content and every piece become a reality.  If you truly cared, you wouldn’t be trying to stop me right now,” Evillustrator said.
“I know you, Nathaniel, better than I know myself.  I know that you’ll regret what you’ve done, please come with us and give me your pen.  Then, after ladybug gets here, the damage you’ve caused can be reversed, and we can go back to-”
“Go back to what?  When you and your class gets to be happy while I sit in silence in my class?  While I get harassed and bullied, constantly put in your shadow while you’re basking in attention?  The spotlight will soak you up.  Every creation I make is made with so much passion and time, yet nothing ever competes with yours.  Every word I say means nothing in comparison to people like Marinette!  Lila and Hawkmoth have helped me realize this, and you will pay for what you’ve done,” Evillustrator yelled, grabbing his pen and quickly drawing roughly on his board.
His sketching was rushed and rough, as he quickly drew harsh lines, forming many, many stick figures.  Each stick figure slowly stood up , and soon there was an army, each one immediately charging.
Max quickly slammed his laptop shut and moved it aside on the ground, abandoning his bag.  
Aurore on the other hand, immediately started fighting back, her umbrella dueling as both a shield and a sword.  Marc quickly wore off the shock and started grabbing his keys in his hand and began slashing wildly at the stick figures, but to no avail.  Max, however had a different approach.
“Look, at his tablet.  It’s flashing red, it must be running out of battery so he’s drawing messier and faster,” Max said, pointing to Evillustrator.
“Why is that?  He didn’t have that issue before!” Aurore yelled, as she extended her umbrella to block the overhead stick figures, jumping down upon her.
“Hawkmoth must be running out of energy.  If the tablet is shutting down, then I’m guessing he’s too busy to save the stick figures.  We need to make him use all the rest of the battery without saving the stick figure drawing.  If the tablet shuts down, then hopefully the drawings won’t be saved, and they’ll disappear!” Marc yelled, as he attacked the stick figure jumping behind from Max.
Aurore exchanged a look between the two boys before yelling, “Guys!  It’s okay!  I can handle myself over here!”
Evillustrator immediately began to draw more complicated figures.  Gotcha right where I want you!  If I can just get a few more drawings out, they’ll be right where I want them!  Evillustrator schemed.
Aurore however, quickly dodged all their attacks, and began to run wildly while using her umbrella as a shield in front of her, pushing all the other stick figures in front of her out of the way as she charged on through.
Evillustrator began to get more and more frustrated, as he drew more and more.  Eventually, Marc and Max joined in, causing distractions from all over the place.  As time went on, Evillustrator began to get more and more furious, until one point, he was fed up.  He quickly drew out a sword and soon it formed at the feet of one of his stick figures, as it charged for Aurore.  That’ll teach her, no more Mr.Nice GuyTM.  He thought grimly.
Marc, however, was horrified and immediately ran to Aurore.  Marc began to profusely fight the figure but as time went on, his footing got lazier until eventually Marc was knocked on the ground as Aurore was holding off more stick figures.
The stick figure wasted no time in charging forth, extending their sword and raising it above their head.
Nathaniel’s eyes widened as he tried to scream, yet his voice was silenced.  He began trying to erase the stick figures, but lost track of which stick figure was which and who had the sword.
I’m so sorry I failed you, Nathaniel.  Please forgive me.  Marc said, giving up and welcoming death’s embrace.  He closed his eyes and waited.
Yet it never came.
All at once, all of the stick figures began to glitch out and became distorted, and right before the faceless stick figure’s sword came down, a mere inch away from Marc’s eyes, it too froze.  Soon afterwards, each stick figure disappeared, and so did the sword.
Using Evillustrator’s frozen shock to his advantage, Max leaped up and snatched the pen away from him, and Aurore slammed it into two.  Immediately, Evillustrator’s costume dropped as he de-transformed.  Nathaniel stood there, horrified as he took in the site around him, as saw the smashed pen and dead drawing tablet beside him.  He eyes watered as he began to quietly sob, his nose becoming stuffy and his face becoming red.  His shoulders and hands shook as Marc slowly stepped towards him.
“I-I’m so sorry...I’ve d-done horrible horrible things.  I sw-swear I never meant any of it,” he said, as he hiccuped and sniffled.  He then let out a pained sob as Marc immediately embraced him, resting Nathaniel’s head on his shoulder.  Aurore strangled the butterfly in her hands as Max grabbed his previously empty computer case as they shoved it inside.  Aurore and Max began to laugh and cry out of relief as they collapsed in relief on the ground.
“It’s alright, Nathaniel.  I know that wasn’t you just there, and you’re okay now, you’re safe.  I promise you that,” Marc said, brushing away his tears.
“But I let Hawkmoth take advantage of me!  I let him take control!  The things I’ve done are unforgivable-”
“You were manipulated, taken advantage of, and used.  But dwelling on it won’t fix it.  What will help fix is taking Hawkmoth and Mayura down, along with the other villains that are coming to Paris.  Please, Nathaniel we need you.  I need you,” Marc spoke softly.  For a moment, there was silence until...
“I’ll join you,” Nathaniel spoke at last.
~~~~~~~~~~~~(⌐■_■)~~~~~~~~~~~~
“-we are living in constant fear, and the heroes have been fighting non-stop since the war began.  Please, we are begging you!.......send help.”
Bruce paused before sighing.  “Was that all of them?” he asked, trying to analyze and break down the information.
“Sure is.  As I said, these claims are getting barbaric.  Anyone can hire an animation studio and editor to make these silly edits, but there hasn’t been any documentation of actual property damage, and look at the Eiffel tower!  It’s being destroyed in every one of these and yet it’s ‘magically’ rebuilt in the next video.  Not to mention, some girl on a teenager’s blog is trying to present herself as a Mary Sue, she’s delusional and stuck in a fantasy to claim that she’s best friends with a superheroes and celebrities.  This has got to be some online joke or trend-”
“But where would these teenagers get the budgets from?  What about the news articles written by adults?” Bruce challenged.
“You can’t seriously think these could be real.  Ladybug and Chat Noir?  Really?  No one’s super powers could reverse the broken arms of people, the ill and the sick, and repair city damage in one fell swoop.  Or better yet, destroy the Eiffel tower with one touch.  It’s CGI, probably funded by those adults too,” Clark countered.
“What about super strength, flight, speed, laser vision?” Bruce argued.
“Supposedly all you have to do to beat these villains is break the options, like a photograph.  So threatening, just terrifying right?” Clark challenged.
“Your weakness if a rock.  A rock.  Is it so far fetched that these could maybe be real?  The Miraculous, Ladybug, Chat Noir, they could easily be real or fake.  We need to do more investigation than this,” Bruce concluded.
“Did someone say the miraculous?” Diana said, freezing in her spot by the doorway.
“Oh wow, looks someone uses the door like a normal person...COUGH COUGH BRUCE COUGH COUGH…”
Diana gave him a stern glare.
“We were just going over video feeds of the current condition of Paris.  Villains like the Joker, Harley Quinn, and Ivy have all been spotted in Paris,” Bruce said, tuning out Clark.
“No, before that you said there was a black cat and ladybug Miraculous?” Diana said, with wide eyes.
“Yes, there were supposedly reports of two...young adults I think?  They were dressed up as vigilantes and were supposedly fighting crime, why do you ask?  Have you heard of them?” Bruce asked.
“Heard of them?  Why my mother grew up telling me stories about her days as the super heroine Ladybug!  Her tales were my bedtime stories for years!” she retold, with a fond look in her eyes.
“Your mother?  That girl looked nothing like Hippolyta, are you sure you’re not mixing it up with something else?” Bruce asked.
“I’m quite sure, after all my mother gave up being Ladybug a long time ago.  The Ladybug Miraculous doesn’t just have a sworn duty to one place, but to the rest of the world.  My mother couldn’t travel to the rest of the world while looking after the amazons, and thus entrusted the miraculous to one of the Guardians,” she spoke.
“Who was is this Guardian?  The Black Cat guy?” Clark questioned.
“Oh heavens no, the Guardians were much much older than that boy is.  These superheroes are powered by an object called the Miraculous, granting each user immense power.  The Guardians are meant to protect these Miraculous, but after the incident at one of the temples...only one of them is still left...but anyways, the Ladybug and Chat Noir Miraculous are extremely powerful, the strongest Miraculous actually,” she explained, while walking over to the video files.
“What do these Miraculous do?” asked Bruce.
“And again, how does that explain the damage to the city?” Clark added.
“Each Miraculous has a different ability; time travel, teleportation, complete destruction, and creation, you name it.  Each Miraculous has a unique ability, that they can only use once.  The Ladybug Miraculous represents luck and has the ability to reverse any Miraculous caused damage.  Buildings, broken bones, illness, you name it.  The only thing the Miraculous of creation and luck can’t reverse is death, for death lies in the hands of the counter partner, the Black Cat,” Wonder Woman said, as she sped up the videos and glimpsed through them.
“The Black Cat represents death and misfortune, and with a simple touch of a hand, entire buildings can collapse and fade to nothing within a second.  If you’re unprotected with a Miraculous suit, the Black Cat’s abilities can kill you in less than a second, and Ladybug won’t be able to reverse that damage.  Each Miraculous, when new, can only use their abilities once in a battle, but as they grow more experienced, can get more abilities or quirks for each battle,” Wonder Woman finished.
“So the reason there is undocumented damage is due to the Ladybug woman?” Bruce finally asked, while side glancing at Clark.
“Precisely, meaning these claims may very well be legitimate.  However, there still isn’t much seen with Gotham’s villains, there are barely any sightings,” Diana added.
“Any lead is still good enough for me,” Bruce said, already getting ready to leave for Paris, and booking an appointment on his phone.  However, he stopped when he looked down to see his phone exploding with phone calls and texts from Alfred.  This of course sent Bruce into a panic, Alfred knew he was going to be out in the suit, and to not call unless there were emergencies.
Quickly, Bruce dialed Alfred back while rushing out the window door.  Immediately, Alfred picked up.
“We are going to have a visitor.  I will be preparing the guest bedroom.  Please arrive immediately, it has to do with the condition of Paris.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~(⌐■_■)~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I’ll be right, Marinette.  I must go and prepare your room.  Would you like me to prepare you some tea?” Alfred asked, while grabbing her backpack.  He beckoned to the Miracle Box, but Marinette shook her head.  She shook her head, taking the box and placing it in her lap.
“I’ll be alright, you’ve done so much for me already.  I will never be able to repay you for your kindness,” she responded.  Alfred nodded.  As he was about to leave, he got a phone call from Master Bruce.
“Wait right here, I’ll be back soon.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~(⌐■_■)~~~~~~~~~~~~
Each day was worse than the last.  There were no known leads about the Joker’s whereabouts, and Damian was getting impatient and pent up.  With nowhere else to put his energy, he took Titus out for a run.
Damian knew the Joker was planning something, and it was driving him nuts.  As they strolled around the city, Titus could tell his heart just wasn’t in it and abruptly pulled on his shirt, nearly causing him to fall over.
“What is it, Titus?” Damian asked, before taking notice of the sky.  His father would surely be home by now.  He sighed before changing course, and making his way back home.
When he reached the doorstep, he realized the light was on in the spare bedroom. Strange.  He thought.  Father rarely allows guests over, and always gives them a heads up to be more cautious.
He shrugged as he made his way over to the door.  Suddenly, Titus made a run for it inside and bolted inside towards the living room.
Damian stood up alarmed, ready to attack and dashed around the corner towards the living room.
On the couch, sat a small girl clutching a box.  Her hair was a dreadful mess, and her clothes looked tattered and worn out.  She fidgeting on the couch as she looked around and glanced out the window.
Titus ran over and started barking and trying to grab at and bite the strange box.  He could sense something was strange about the girl, something he wasn’t familiar with and it sent him into a frizzy.  It sent the short girl into a frenzy and she instantly grabbed at the box and made a dash for it.  She leaped over the couch and knocked over the lamp next to it.  She looked panicked but was quickly stopped before she reached the door.
She collided with Damian and fell onto the ground with Titus catching up and barking in her ears as she lie on the ground, shaking in fear.  Her eyes were teary and unfocused, almost lost in the moment.  The Miracle Box shook, and the sounds of jewels and valuables sliding around were heard from inside the box. It wouldn’t be the first time someone had attempted to break into the Wayne Manor to steal its valuables, and Damian was sure it wouldn’t be the last.  Titus’s ears were flattened, his tail between his legs, as his eyes were filled with fear and concern.  Damian’s heart clenched at the sight of Titus looking so scared, before his look hardened into a cold glare at the stranger.
“WHO ARE YOU AND HOW DID YOU GET IN HERE?” Damian demanded, already posed to attack.  When she didn’t respond, he tried to grab the box while Titus was still barking in her ear, fearful of the stranger.
She froze for only a moment before slamming her elbow into his chin and quickly sidestepping him.  Damian charged, startling her enough to drop the box, hearing her call out :
“TIKKI SP-”
Alfred burst into the room stunning the both of them and separated the two immediately.  Damian was about to lunge before Alfred grabbed him from behind and forcefully pulled him off, and then swiftly grabbed the box and placed it into Marinette’s hands.  He grabbed Damian by the shirt and tugged on Titus’s leash, dragging them both outside of the room.
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How do you feel about Catra, Shadow Weaver, and Hordak? I know you said you find SW interesting but like on a scale how redeemable do you think these characters are. Ive seen a lot of infighting in the fandom cause some people love one and hate another and I just figured you would approach the topic nicely
Oh damn, happy to respond! (Under the cut because I don’t know how to shut up.) 
I think I’ve seen some of the posts that you’re talking about, and my friend did tell me that there was apparently tension between Entrapdak and Catradora shippers for that very reason. Still, I should start off by saying that the only character who is probably completely irredeemable is Horde Prime. And knowing this show, they’ll find a way to humanize even him if they are so inclined. The great thing about She-Ra is that there aren’t so much heroes and villains as there are complicated people. Undertale is the same way. This might sound weird, but I legitimately hope Horde Prime does get humanized, because otherwise it’s just way too easy for all of the characters to band together and take him out for a happy ending. This show has never had a character that was pure evil before, know what I mean? 
With that in mind...let’s talk about Hordak. 
I know, I know...before Horde Prime was known to us...Hordak basically was Horde Prime. That’s the role he played in the show, and it’s not like he isn’t guilty of countless war crimes. He’s a conqueror, and yeah, conquerors should not get off scot-free. But...Hordak is also clearly an abuse victim. That doesn’t excuse him from what he’s done, but I can’t just ignore it. He was so eager to get back to Horde Prime, so determined to please him and prove himself to his “big brother.” and the moment that they’re reunited? We see what a nightmare it is for Hordak, see him get mentally violated and brain-washed. This can’t be the first time it’s happened, and yet all Hordak wanted was to return to Horde Prime. This man is so sheltered and so emotionally stunted in relationships, that I doubt he understands the full ramifications of his actions. He certainly doesn’t understand that he’s in abusive relationship. Hordak is just doing what he knows. He could learn better, if he learns to accept what a monster Horde Prime is. (But first he’ll need to break from the conditioning.)
 I genuinely like how it took Entrapta, a character who isn’t really loyal to either side, to reach out to him and help him understand how it feels for a person to care about him, and not fear him even when he tries to be intimidating. And whether or not you ship them, (I do, I admit it) Hordak clearly has feelings for her and that guides his character in Season 4. I don’t know if Adora and the others will agree to take him in...but Entrapta will remember the bond they had. I just feel so bad for this guy, even if he has killed countless innocents. My philosophy about redeeming villains is very much a pragmatic one...will Hordak’s redemption spit in the face of all his victims? Perhaps. Will it bring them back to life? No. But neither will executing him or throwing him in prison. If he can heal, if he can learn better, and do better...why should we waste that growth? Why shouldn’t he be allowed the chance to make up for what he’s done? It seems to me like there is everything to be gained, and nothing to be lost, in letting him redeem himself.
Of course, there are many types of crimes...let’s move on to Shadow Weaver.
....She’s a child abuser. Plain and simple. That is a hard pill to swallow, that is a very difficult thing for me to look past. I don’t think I can do it. The way she treated Catra, the way it’s ruined Catra and Adora’s relationship...it’s unspeakable. She manipulates Catra one last time and leaves her high and dry so she can escape and go to Bright Moon...whereupon, she starts grooming Glimmer the same way she did Micah. I know it seems silly to be more upset about child abuse than what probably amounts to genocide on Hordak’s part...but part of it is how relatable the crimes are. There’s a reason most Harry Potter fans hate Umbridge more than Voldemort. Most people don’t know a mass-murderer, and excusing a character like Hordak won’t change their perspective on murder being wrong. But plenty of people might know an abuser, and abusers thrive on a culture that blames victims and downplays the effects of abuse, or otherwise excuses those responsible. We need to get better about sending the message that abuse is real, and wrong. But the great thing about She-Ra is that it depicts the cycle, from Shadow Weaver to Catra. If Catra is redeemable, why not Shadow Weaver? 
And here’s the thing...I’m not saying she isn’t redeemable. Just that I don’t expect this show to fully redeem her, and I’m 100% behind that outcome. She could be allowed to live in peace with the other characters, her victims might forgive or at least tolerate her. (Especially if she wins over Micah again.) But even if I find her genuinely compelling...I’m not seeing too many outcomes where she would deserve this mercy. Shadow Weaver has done terrible, selfish things, and her only loyalties seem to lie with knowledge and power. She’s completely unrepentant, and while she acknowledges that she was “hard on Catra” she also refuses to apologize. Shadow Weaver strikes me very much as a kind of “no regrets” type of person. But she also has a fascination with power, and any time she sees a youngin’ with a lot of potential, (Micah, Adora) she seeks to train them. Considering how poor her record is...she needs to stop doing this. I might be inclined to forgive Shadow Weaver, if she acknowledges her own short-comings, apologizes to the people she’s hurt, and realizes that looking after children is not something she’s cut out to do.  
Finally, there’s Catra. 
In many ways, she’s my favorite character. (Though I also might go with Glimmer.) The story is largely centered around Catra’s journey alongside Adora’s...she might as well be a secondary protagonist. What’s more, she’s a character who we basically know is going to get redeemed, Noelle has all but told us that it’s going to happen. I’m fine with her getting redeemed but so help me god if she dies in the process....if any aspiring writers are reading this, please stop killing your villains to complete their redemption arcs. Let them enjoy being redeemed. Please. Anyway, where was I? Ah that’s right, Catra. There have been times that I was beyond frustrated with her because she was purposefully choosing to be “evil” as Double Trouble lampshades at the end of Season 4. By the time she opened up the Portal, after sentencing Entrapta to die, nearly dooming the entire world, causing Angela’s death, and despite it all she still blamed Adora even though she only did all of this because she wanted to beat Adora...yeah, I was really running out of patience for Catra. And even now, I can’t really bring myself to agree with the fans as they draw parallels between Catra opening the Portal and Glimmer activating the Heart of Etheria. I’m sure this was intentional, too. The echoing of two characters dooming everyone through an impulsive, reckless choice. However...as I said, Catra was pretty much going off the deep end when she opened the Portal. She just wanted to stick it to Adora. I realize I may be biased as a Glimmer stan, but Glimmer was at least trying to defeat the Horde. Her intentions, however misguided, were noble. She thought she was doing the right thing. Catra just didn’t care. 
All this, and you might think I’m Anti-Catra, that I await her inevitable redemption with gritted teeth. But that’s not true at all. Catra is a character who is her own worst enemy, and characters like that have a knack for winning my sympathy. She continues to dig herself into a deeper hole and hurts those around her in the process. Part of her journey is realizing that and presumably working to change it. This is why I love how distant she becomes from Lonnie and the others in S4. Why I love Double Trouble betraying and completely shutting her down with their monologue about her. Why I cheered louder than you can imagine at “You’re a bad friend.” Because it was such an amazing crossroads in the development of both Scorpia and Catra’s characters. To be clear, I love these moments not because I dislike Catra, but because I genuinely like her as a character, and Catra as a “good guy” is a lot of fun. I don’t know how many people remember what it was like in the first episode when Catra and Adora were still besties, but it was just generally fun. I miss that dynamic. I want Catra to learn from her mistakes. Because I rambled on about the terrible things Shadow Weaver has done, and onscreen those were primarily done to Catra. She’s a character that I am rooting for one-hundred percent. A character who is almost a deconstruction of the tired writing trope “They had a hard childhood, and now that you know that, they are redeemed.” Catra turns that on it’s head. “Promise” is one of my favorite episodes for this very reason. Few moments have gotten me as choked up as Adora saying that she thought Catra didn’t care about being Force Captain, and Catra exploding with “Well I was lying, obviously!” It was a reveal that I genuinely didn’t see coming, but it makes so much sense, and demonstrates how much Catra has sacrificed for Adora and how much that weighs on her every time she makes a villainous decision. 
TL;DR: I am one-hundred percent on board with Catra and Hordak redemption, and tentatively on board with Shadow Weaver redemption.
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upfrog · 4 years
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So I finished reading Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality
This isn’t so much a review, as an attempt to cement some of my thoughts, and to at least write something down, the better that I will not look back in a year and not be able to remember a thing of what I thought of HPMOR. But overall... that was quite a thing.
HPMOR is long. Longer (by word count, which isn’t a perfect method of judging this) than War and Peace, the normal benchmark for “really long books”. I don’t consider getting through it to be an accomplishment, in the sense of say, getting through Homestuck, though maybe that’s only because I have tried, and failed to do the latter several times. It may also be because the plot is, for all it’s time travel and scientific tangents, less complex than Homestuck. I do not expect it to stick in my mind the way the canonical books do. While I do not consider them to be high literature, the canonical Harry Potter books, in addition to being entirely an entirely decent story, had a certain... Depth, of sorts, to them. Some of this may come from the midi-chlorian effect; the workings of magic are never discussed greatly in the canonical books, but much of HPMOR Harry’s efforts are devoted to understanding magic from a scientific perspective. I think it is more likely that it is because HPMOR simply had a more limited scope.
HPMOR set out to be a puzzle, an encouragement of rational thought patterns, a demonstration of how they might be applied to great benefit. And it does this. While potential plot holes and inconsistencies exist, it does this fairly well on the whole. But there isn’t that much beneath it, at least not that I have seen. It’s a good enough story, and the way it chooses to fill in the unfinished coloring book of Rowling’s world creates a compellingly interesting universe, albeit not a pleasant one. It has some good humor at some parts (more on that later), many clever moments, and some moments that are, frankly, just plain awesome, though these often contribute to the monstrously overpowered being that Harry is. Both versions shared the core theme of (spoiler warning: the rest of this paragraph. If you’re interested, I’d really advise you to just read it so that you don’t have the dramatic tension reduced) Harry ultimately triumphing by virtue of who he is. Triumphing by being, as we would describe it, a better human being than his opponent. The difference is that in the canonical books, this is a much more theological process. By the final book, Rowling is pretty much bashing us over the head with a crucifix. I still maintain that, unless the hill you wish to die on is unmarried teen snogging, declaring Harry Potter as heresy for the simple fact that it includes magic is to foolishly ignore the veritable flood of Christian messaging the books contain. I thought I’d made a post about that, but apparently not, so I’ll divert myself to that briefly. 
Spoilers for the whole canonical Harry Potter main series in the following paragraph:
The entire story is based on an innocent child who was permitted to live because of the intensely real power and protection offered by the selfless sacrifice of another to protect said child. So there, straight off the bat, right in the premise. And then in the 7th book, Harry does the exact same thing, but more so, and pretty much pulls an Aslan, “dying” willingly to protect others, but not by this being truly killed. And it’s not like the Christian messaging in Narnia is obscure. And at the end of the first Harry Potter book, Dumbledore, the most “good guy” character that the series has to offer goes off explaining how “to the well organized mind, death is but the next great adventure”. Then, in no particular order, having not done anything like a read through specifically looking out for these: the primacy of the soul over the physical, the specifically soul-corrupting nature of evil and killing, the power of redemption and forgiveness, the ultimate triumph of good over evil, the concept of powers that, while attainable, will damage your soul forever, and the existence of life after death. Anyway, back to the main matter.
HPMOR lacks any semblance of this depth (not that this is the deepest thing in the world mind), at least that I have been able to detect, and this makes it a lesser story to me.
The first ten or so chapters of HPMOR were pretty great as comedy. Harry constantly befuddling the wizarding world, and being befuddled by it, makes for some great laughs. Later on it undergoes a pretty significant tone change, and I had a very hard time adjusting to it, and enjoying the latter portion (which makes up most of the fic) for what it is. I did ultimately reach that point, but it was jarring.
This fic has some pretty obscure references. Have any of y’all read “Negima!?”? The author of this fic has. ( or at least, he’s watched some of the show.) It also had an offhanded reference to Madoka Magica, which is less obscure, but I still appreciate it. 
HPMOR Harry just keeps on getting more and more powers. (potential spoilers ahead, less severe): It seems like every month he’s making some discovery of how to do something that the entire wizarding world “knows” is totally impossible. It makes a certain sense, in context, but it certainly does contribute to some Mary Sue-like feeling. But on the other hand, Harry routinely oversteps his cleverness, failing to think things through enough, missing obvious points that would have counter-indicated his action. And some of the consequences are rather severe, so I don’t knock too many points off for it. Harry is powerful, but he is also rather a child genius in this telling, and all things considered, most of his discoveries don’t seem too ridiculous. 
I earlier mentioned that the world HPMOR painted was rather interesting. It (mostly) doesn’t directly contradict the wizarding world as portrayed in the common, but it does color in many of the blanks, and this author paints in dark colors. Wizarding britain, as portrayed in HPMOR, would be considered barbaric to most of the people reading this. Or perhaps it would merely be considered “medieval”. It certainly has some things going for it. It is portrayed as a place with relatively little history of institutional sexism, or racism amongst wizards. Even the stodgiest pure bloods find it silly to discriminate based on skin color. Wizarding Britain sees little wrong with homosexuality, and it is entirely un-taboo. But things get worse from there.
It is implied, or at least, I took away the message from my last reading some years ago, that the Wizarding power structure in the canonical books is... incompetent. That the benchmark of being a “fully qualified” witch or wizard does not in fact entail very much true competency, and many of the more powerful figures are somewhat dumb. HPMOR confirms this, and brings it into the light, offering more examples of just how useless most wizards are in matters non-magical. Wizarding Britain is controlled by an incompetent government, which is primarily controlled by one or several “Noble and Most Ancient House(s)”. The extent of Lucius Malfoy’s influence is brought up often in the canonical books, and the same is true here. This is a world where (minor spoiler for something before chapter 10-ish) a young noble raping a girl, and yes, girl is the proper noun here, repeatedly, and getting away with it indefinitely, is an open secret. Where this young noble’s security is secured by: a) the victim and her families’ fear of his familial power, b) memory charms, and c) a court system where the interests of the Noble Houses are often a primary concern. 
Wizarding news is minimal, and it seems to primarily toe the ministry (which is to say, aristocratic) line, save for the Quibbler, which... on the whole, isn’t great news either. There is no particular concept of a fair trial at play in this world, especially if your crime was committed against a noble house. Less than three days investigation is considered enough to go from crime to a sentence of ten years in Azkaban. And then there’s Azkaban itself. For all it is a prominent feature in the books, and Dumbledore’s opposition to it is often mentioned, Azkaban doesn’t get much light shone on it in the canonical books. This is likely in part because it is such an incredibly, ridiculously cruel place that it becomes very difficult for many of us muggles to imagine it being an appropriate punishment for anyone. I won’t go into great detail, but there are very few crimes capable of causing enough pain that, even working from a perspective of vengeance, instead of justice or rehabilitation, it becomes very difficult to mathematically justify Azkaban. 
To clarify, by mathematically justify, I mean, what percent of the pain a criminal inflicts by his misdeed can fairly be unleashed upon the criminal as punishment. Is a beating a proper punishment for beating someone? What about two beatings? Or three? At what point does the severity of the punishment become so much greater than that of the crime that it stops being sensible? If you slapped me, would I, absent any concerns about self defense or ensuring my future safety, be justified in immediately shooting you? Or boiling you? Or beating you to death? The murders who are so successful that we stop calling them murders and start calling them statesmen might have a shot at a mathematically (if not necessarily ethically) justifiable cell in Azkaban. For everyone else, it’s pretty difficult. And in both versions of the story, wizarding justice is NOT perfect. Innocent people go to Azkaban, and are exposed to this as well. Azkaban is pretty terrible, and most of the wizarding world just sort of... accepts it.
Anyway, I probably have more to say, but I really need to wrap this up. This probably wasn’t very coherent, so sorry about that. 
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superkitty21 · 4 years
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So, The Rise of Skywalker was a thing
I laughed, I cried, I sighed in disappointment, but somehow, despite everything, I liked it. (Major fucking spoilers for the whole movie btw)
Okay, I don't know where to start so I'm gonna talk about the Palpatine thing. This film feels like the writers went in and tried to "fix" alleged plot holes in the previous films. As someone who loved TLJ, Rey being no one special was something I found engaging about that film. The Star Wars franchise is really obsessed with legacy and blood and heritage (especially that of your male line) and Rey being nobody was a refreshing break from having to justify your character as a protagonist by proving them to be the special. I'm really annoyed that Rey couldn't just be Rey she HAD to be someone special, the granddaughter of someone IMPORTANT to 'explain' her talent and skill with the force and to justify her role as protagonist of this franchise.
On top of this, revealing Palpatine to be the master manipulator of this whole conflict felt so cheap to me. TLJ completely shifted the status quo and took the Star Wars franchise to places we haven't seen before. So returning to the plot line of "we must defeat the evil Sith" betrays the ending of TLJ. I was excited to see where this franchise was going next after the explosive ending of TLJ and finding out that we were just going to rehash plot beats from 40 years ago was more than a little disappointing.
The sequel trilogy has been a balancing act between pulling on our nostalgia strings and telling a new story and The Rise of Skywalker, in returning to Palpatine as the villain and making Rey his granddaughter, tipped the scales of this trilogy to boring rehash and it all feels like such wasted potential.
The romantic subplots in this one were... messy (to say the least). It felt very clear to me that the writers didn't know where they were going with Finn's romantic arc at all throughout this series. I'd like to start by saying RIP to Finn/Rose shippers because the writers utterly dismissed Finn and Rose's ENTIRE relationship. It's not even acknowledged that these two even know each other outside of the context of co-workers. The complete sidelining of Rose in this story is almost shameful. I can only assume this was done in response to the massive harassment campaigns targeted at Kelly Marie Tran post-TLJ. Not only was caving to the racist trolls and removing Rose from the story disrespectful to Rose's character, but it also made Finn's romantic arc so incohesive. They brought back the Finnrey dynamic from The Force Awakens, but then never developed on Finn and Rey's relationship in any meaningful way. It seemed as if they were going to make the stormtrooper defector, Jannah, a love interest but then never really went there either (thank god). It was messy and unfocused and I had no idea where they were going with any of it, and it turns out they didn't either.
They also decided to give Poe a love interest. out of nowhere. in the last film of this trilogy. Pour one out for Stormpilot shippers because that ship sank harder than the titanic. In trying to fully assert Poe Dameron's heterosexuality they felt the need to add a completely irrelevant and frankly out of place romantic subplot for Poe. Did doing this add to the story in any way? No. Did it add anything to Poe's characterization? No. So I have to assume its there to make sure everyone in the audience knows that Finn and Poe could never, in any way, shape, or form, under any context, ever, EVER be in a romantic relationship despite their obvious chemistry. Legit, the scenes with Poe and Zorii in Kijimi felt like an ad for a Poe Dameron tie-in prequel novel.
Kylo's redemption arc isn't the best I've seen. I'm generally not one for redemption arcs being motivated by external factors (ie your mother dying) rather than an internal realization and growth. There is an argument to be made that Kylo has been explicitly shown in struggling with the light the whole trilogy, but I still would have liked more lead up to his eventual switch and for the choice to be more his own rather than compelled by his mother's death and his girlfriend giving him puppy dog eyes.
Absolution through sacrifice is also a big pet peeve of mine, but somehow it worked for me in this one. It's probably because Ren's redemption is really isolated to his relationship to his family and Rey. Given that his most egregious actions were to his immediate family I wouldn't could it as a flaw in the film and it certainly made it easier to buy in to arc. And I never got the feeling that TROS never fully absolved Kylo of his crimes against the galaxy. Similarly to how despite his final sacrifice, Darth Vader is still seen as evil by the wider galaxy, I get the sense that Kylo Ren despite his heel turn will be in a similar position. I won't begrudge anyone who thinks his shift to the light feels to sudden, or that his motivations felt a bit weak, or those who generally just can't buy it, but it worked or me. 🤷🏾‍♀️
Now's probably a good time to mention that I'm a massive fucking Reylo and ate every scene of Kylo and Rey up like it was candy. I get why some people don't like this ship and I think if you're not on board with these two by the end of the film the ending to Ren's story won't be very satisfying. Given that I already loved these two's relationship that Ren's ultimate sacrifice got me straight in the feels and that contributed to my ultimate satisfaction with the film.
Okay, That's everything I wanted to be analytical about. Now here are just some random, unrendered thoughts.
*I absolutely adored the main trio in this movie. Their dynamic was fun and they all clicked so well together and made me what a whole nother trilogy about these three precious beans. Imma be reading a LOT of jedistormpilot fics after this because that unit was fantastic.
*I'm a bit peeved that they fake out 'killed' C-3PO cause his final goodbye was actually really touching. Bringing him back undercut what I thought was a really touching farewell.
*I don't think I've gushed enough about how much I adored all of the force bond stuff that happened in this movie because that shit was beautiful. I could not get enough of the Reylo force battles. Their final scene was *chef''s kiss* and I'll be rewatching it as much as I do the praetorian guard fight.
*Shout out to this film for remembering force sensitive Finn was a thing. I respect that.
*RIP Hux. I know I'm one of the 7 people who actually care, but I'm upset that he was given such a minor role and killed off by nameless first order general guy. Like he couldn't have even be killed by Kylo. smh
*The new droid was super cute. 10/10. Would buy a lifesize plush of that guy.
*This movie made me imagine Sheev Palpatine impregnating someone and I can never forgive it for that.
*The Knights of Ren were so unintentionally comedic to me. I genuinely burst out laughing every time I saw them because they were these back goons with these silly weapons that did basically nothing. I feel bad for anyone who was hyped to see them cause they were so inconsequential. The porgs in TLJ had more characterization than they did. One of the best moments in this whole movie was when a random stormtrooper that saw them and simply said "squad goals". I almost fucking died. That stormtrooper and Cait Salt-Licker are absolute legends.
*This may be the least visually interesting movies in the sequel trilogy. Don't get me wrong there is some gorgeous cinematography and shot composition in this movie. Every single scene with Palpatine was amazing and gave me chills, but it did feel like there were less jaw dropping stunning scenes in this one compared to The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi. No one moment really sticks out to me as much as say, the Holdo maneuver did in TLJ or the forest lightsaber fight in TFA.
I don't think this movie will be well loved by many people. People who've hated the sequels thus far may be won over by the return of Palpatine, but I don't think it's enough to win over the detractors. I think people who genuinely liked the direction these films seemed to be taking after The Last Jedi will be disappointed in how this one plays out. There was a lot to love about The Rise of Skywalker, but there was also a lot of missed potential.
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cacchieressa · 5 years
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Name ten favourite characters from ten different things (books, tv, film, etc.) then tag ten people
@gffa tagged me and you guys, this is hard. And the list could change at any moment! Certainly it’s not in any specific order except that which I thought of the characters, but here we go:
Princess Leia, Star Wars. PERFECT SPACE PRINCESS. ROLE MODEL FOR LIFE. And i mean that, because I ‘met’ her when I was 7 and she showed me that a princess could be smart, funny, angry and in charge of all the dumb boys around her. She could rescue herself when given the opportunity, and she could bear up under tremendous strain and sorrow to do what needed to be done. She could also choke a motherfucker out with the chain he put around her neck while wearing a terrible metal bikini. When the dumb boys I knew as a kid insisted Han was the “other” Yoda was referring to, I knew it had to be Leia and much like Leia herself, I was very satisfied when I was right and I didn’t let them forget it either. *g*
Eowyn, Lord of the Rings. Another amazing princess (we had mostly only princesses or plucky girl detectives when I was a kid, so bear with me, you’ll see some of each on this list), who didn’t want to be left behind, who wanted glory and also to not be constantly told that it wasn’t her place to fight and die for her king. I also feel like in the films, the Theodeon and Eowyn storyline is the most emotionally resonant and it never fails to make me cry.
Tenar, Earthsea. I love everything about Tenar - when she’s a petty teenage priestess trying to figure out how to be an adult in the Place and when she’s teasing Ged in the darkness of the treasure room and when she’s a grown woman, widowed and still trying to fit herself into the slot society has chosen for her, brave and loving and full of gentle humor at her own (and sometimes, Ged’s) expense.
Sirius Black, Harry Potter. Oh man, I can, have, and will fight people on the internet on Sirius Black’s behalf because he’s such a fucking mess but he’s trying okay. He’s had a shitty life and that’s not an excuse but it is an explanation. He escapes a terrible family situation, he rebels against their indoctrination to fight Nazis Death Eaters, and then he feels so consumed with guilt that he accepts his imprisonment for crimes he didn’t commit for TWELVE YEARS. Until he sees that Harry is once again in danger from Wormtail, and then he executes an unaided escape from Azkaban to protect him. Was he a bully at age 15? Are his priorities skewed? Is his development arrested? Did he contain contradictions? Did he need a lot of help and support he did not get by being locked back up in his childhood horror of a home? Yes to all of this. I don’t care. He still deserved better than what the narrative gave him.
Dan Rydell, Sports Night. DOER OF WONDERFUL DEEDS. Danny is the best, no lie. I don’t understand how anyone prefers Casey when Dan is RIGHT THERE being AMAZING. (I mean, I don’t actually dislike Casey? But I don’t understand why everyone thinks he’s the best when he’s clearly not.) He’s funny, he’s smart, he’s cute, he loves sports (except soccer), he’s a writer, he’s socially conscious, and he doesn’t need $2 off to drink a blue margarita as big as your head.
Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly. I don’t know what it is about Mal that makes me love him so much - he’s broken and desperate and hard, and he’s absolutely shitty to Inara in ways that can’t easily be remediated, but he still has moments of softness and kindness, mostly involving River and Kaylee and his ship. He’s someone who’s had his loyalty betrayed and lost faith in everything he believed, and he yet can still command loyalty and belief from others. Also for some reason I find his voice really easy to write.
Veronica Mars, Veronica Mars. This new season just reminded me of how much I love her. She is also hard and broken and lonesome, but also brilliant and sharp and occasionally kind. She’s a mess but she’s aware of it, and while she’s not trying to get herself better, she works to make sure other people don’t end up the same way she has.
Stephanie Brown, DC Comics. Steph is kind of the same but opposite of Veronica - she decided she wouldn’t let all the shit that happened to her make her hard; she makes an active choice to be kind and hopeful while also punching evil in the face. Like many of my favorite characters, Steph steps up, knowing that if not her, no one else is going to stop her B-List villain father, and she continues to step up and get up when even the people on her own side are telling her to get lost, that she’s not worth the time and investment, and she proves them wrong over and over. If the other Bats are in service of vengeance or justice or making sure no one else loses their parents in an alleyway, Steph is about hope - that things can get better, that people can rise above circumstances and expectations. Also, fuck you, DC, she was both Robin and Batgirl and you can’t take that away.
Steve Rogers, MCU. Oh Steve. Steve also steps up and gets up, time and time again. His integrity and strong moral compass, his sarcasm and sense of humor, his shrewdness, his ability to inspire everyone around him to want to be the best version of themselves they can be, his complete lack of self-preservation and stubbornness in service of doing what he thinks is right even if he’s basically cutting off his nose to spite his face (I mean, it’s not always a good thing; there are sometimes better ways to get to the right thing, Steve, as Bucky, Natasha, and Sam have all had to remind him at times). 
Katara, Avatar: the Last Airbender. Katara has many admirable qualities, but what I like best about her is her anger and how freely she’s allowed to express it. She’ll call out her brother for his sexism and she’ll call out Master Pakku, too, and she’ll stone cold threaten anyone who offers harm to anyone she cares about but she’ll also find room for forgiveness in her heart for someone who hurt her and the people she cares about. But she also sometimes won’t and that’s okay too. She’ll take on the thankless role of team mom because someone has to, and she’ll put in the hard work and dedication needed to not only become a master waterbender at 14, but also teach the Avatar to master it, too. But she still has her soft and silly and girly side, and she indulges that when she can.
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mst3kproject · 5 years
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Black Dragons
 This is a bizarre and thoroughly mismanaged WWII yellow peril movie.  It features Bela Lugosi and Joan Barclay, both of whom we’ve seen before in The Corpse Vanishes, and was produced by Sam Katzman, who brought us both The Corpse Vanishes and Teenage Crime Wave (also The Giant Claw).  I liked The Corpse Vanishes.  It was fun, fast-paced, and in some ways surprisingly feminist.  Black Dragons is none of those things.
It’s 1942, and Japan has just bombed Pearl Harbour, forcing Americans to stop ignoring World War II.  Stock footage of stuff burning and blowing up is implied to be the work of a bunch of indistinguishable suited men who are sabotaging the allied war effort.  They’re standing around one evening congratulating themselves on how evil they are, when a mysterious Monsieur Coulombe arrives and talks privately with one of them, a Dr. Saunders  Coulombe hypnotizes or drugs Saunders somehow – and in the days that follow, the conspirators start turning up dead, each with a souvenir from the renaissance faire… oh, excuse me, a Japanese dagger… in one hand.  What the hell is going on?
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Well, the ending is supposed to be a surprise, but I’m gonna spoil it for you to save you having to watch the stupid movie.  All the victims, plus Dr. Saunders, are actually Japanese operatives from the Order of Black Dragons who had plastic surgery to turn them into the doubles of American businessmen!  The originals were killed, and the duplicates took their places… and the surgeon?  He was a Nazi who did it as a favour from the Fuhrer, but afterwards the Order tried to kill him so that he could never reveal the plan to anyone.  He escaped, and went to the States to murder them in revenge for their betrayal!
As ideas for an espionage movie go, this one reaches near golden-age comics levels of absurdity and as such it’s almost kind of brilliant.  A movie that used this plot to its full ridiculous potential could be great fun – I especially like that it pits two sets of villains against each other, while the supposed good guys spend most of the film completely clueless.  Black Dragons, however, was rushed onto theatre screens within four months of the bombing of Pearl Harbour, and it’s an utter mess with no idea what to do with its premise.
For being made in 1942, Black Dragons mostly doesn’t look bad.  There are no scenes so dark you can’t see what’s happening, and we get an idea of things like the layout of Dr. Saunders’ house. The characters all kind of look alike but I’ve just had to accept the idea that all white men had the same face until about 1965.  The steps of the Japanese Embassy are obviously somebody’s house with a sign on the door, but I can forgive them that, and the voices sound a little brassy and indistinct but no more so than in The Corpse Vanishes.  The main technical flaw in the film is that most of it has a constant crackling noise in the background, sounding kind of like heavy rain. This is obviously a problem with the print itself, since it continues as we switch scenes from Washington to Philadelphia, and it is very annoying and confusing.
No, almost all of Black Dragons’ many problems are in the writing.  Just based on the premise you can guess that the movie is racist – we’ve got the ‘Japanese dagger’ that doesn’t look even remotely Japanese, and Japanese characters (even some of those who are supposed to look Japanese) played by white guys in costumes and makeup, speaking in fake accents.  And as for the racial issues inherent in the plastic surgery plot point... I don’t actually feel qualified to address those.
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What is slightly more surprising is that it’s also egregiously sexist.  There’s a woman living with Dr. Saunders who’s supposed to be his niece Alice, worried about all the weird things happening around her.  She turns out to be a policewoman who’s there to spy on the fake Dr. Saunders, and she gets shouted at for being entirely incompetent when she fails to solve anything (it must be admitted that she didn’t try very hard).
Everything that surrounds this character is just terrible. She’s there to be one (1) pretty girl, like the film is trying to fill some kind of quota.  Alice is introduced when the chief of police suggests that detective Dick Martin might get somewhere by questioning her.  Martin responds, “let me guess, she’s fifty and flat-footed, and wears glasses.”  Oh my god, you poor thing, you might have to talk to an unattractive woman!  She flirts with Dr. Coulombe throughout the film, even as he hangs around being ridiculously off-putting and creepy.  The revelation that she’s a spy herself explains this, I guess, since she must have been doing it in the hope of learning something from him, but it never avails her anything and is, in the end, useless, much like Alice herself.
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The worst moment is when Martin, who has been trying to get her to move out of this dangerous house, walks into the room and out of nowhere says, “Alice, will you marry me?”  She stares at him like he’s crazy and asks, “what for?”, and I swear to you he actually replies, “so I can beat you up.  It’s the only way I’ll get you out of here.”  I had to pause the movie and watch it again because I couldn’t believe I’d just heard that.  I have combed the internet for a gif that expresses a sufficient level of what the fuck for this line and I cannot find one.  I need Shikha again.
Black Dragons really has no hero.  The closest thing on offer is Detective Martin, who is honestly just as useless as Alice.  I usually enjoy movies that are just a bunch of bad guys trying to thwart each other, but this is actually Black Dragons’ biggest mistake.  If this were supposed to be a suspense film, then we really ought to be focused on Martin (and possibly Alice) trying to solve the mystery.  Martin sees the Japanese agents as upstanding citizens in danger, and he is doing his best to help them but has started to suspect that the victims aren’t as innocent as they appear.
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That has the potential to be an interesting story with a surprising twist at the end, but Black Dragons is not told from Martin’s point of view.  Instead, the audience is privy to at least some of the secrets from the beginning.  We already know that the murder victims are the bad guys, because we watched them brag about it to each other.  We watch Coulombe killing them (though the way he behaves, it would be obvious he’s the murderer even if we didn’t) and hear him calling them by Japanese-sounding names before they die.  By the time we get to what should be the twist, we’ve already figured most of this out (while Martin hasn’t a clue), and the only surprise is that Coulombe’s motivation is personal revenge rather than being a government assassin, as I initially assumed.
A version of the movie that actually tried to keep its secrets secret could also have something I kind of hoped we would see but never did, which is the conspirators interacting with their families.  At least some of the men who were replaced ought to have had parents, siblings, wives, or children, unless they were chosen specifically for being orphaned bachelors with no friends – and that doesn’t seem likely when we know Dr. Saunders had a niece he was close to.  Watching the people around these men feeling like there’s something different but not sure what it is would have been nice and creepy, but Black Dragons is not that subtle.
It’s all doubly unfortunate because there is some cool stuff in this movie.  There’s a bit where rather than killing two of the conspirators himself, Coulombe tricks them into killing each other.  That was nicely done.  His creative methods of hiding bodies are fun, too.  The fact that he ultimately dumps them on the steps of the Japanese embassy with an unconvincing ‘cultural artefact’ in their hands seems like it ought to mean something, like he’s trying to either alert the Americans to the threat or the Japanese to his survival, but nothing is ever really made of this and we never see what the head of the Order of Black Dragons thinks of it at all, as he is seen only in flashback.
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The biggest problem with the whole concept behind Black Dragons is the same one as in Hercules Unchained: they needed to make a movie really fast in order to capitalize on something, and just didn’t have time to figure out what they were actually doing.  Hercules Unchained was a movie that tried to have two storylines at one, neither connected to each other and one of them only barely connected to its main character.  Black Dragons isn’t even sure who its main character is. Dick Martin is the nearest thing to a hero, but an argument could equally be made that this story is about Coulombe as antihero.  The result is a film that’s trying to do too much and too little at the same time.  And of course, Black Dragons’ intentions are way less honourable than Hercules Unchained’s.  Hercules Unchained just wanted to capitalize on a popular film.  Black Dragons was capitalizing on a literal act of war!
A version of Black Dragons that tried to do justice to its silly premise would still have been a bad movie.  It would still be an old, grainy print with sound issues, and it would still be deeply racist (among many, many other things, there’s a particularly detestable bit where Coulombe insults the Japanese operatives by calling them ‘apes’) and probably still have that stunningly horrible line about how you have to marry a woman before you’re allowed to beat her.  But it would have been a much more interesting and entertaining bad movie than it ultimately ended up being.
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averagemarvelbitch · 5 years
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The One With The Red Sweater - Part 2
The one where Steve and Tony are celebrating their one year anniversary, Bucky has a big mouth (and regrets it) and everything goes wrong.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Tags: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Powers.
Chapters: 2/2
AO3
Tagging because I thought you guys might like to read the second part! @barnesbuchananjamie @instantlyshadowen @stonyverse @iron-captain
Tony stayed the next three days at home. Fooling Jarvis was rather easy. He only had to tell the butler he felt really sick and with his red eyes and runny nose (from all the crying) it was an easy sell. Jarvis did look a bit suspicious, but said nothing, and let Tony stay at home for as long as he needed.
Tony knew he had to go to school sometime. He couldn’t avoid Steve, and everyone else, forever. But he was so embarrassed. God, why did he have to tell his friends all those things about not ever being chosen? Now they knew how he felt AND they knew Steve had never really liked Tony, he was just being polite, like always. And oh god, the dates. They dated for a year. They kissed, they cuddled. Had Steve been uncomfortable in all this situations? Had Tony forced himself on Steve without knowing he wasn’t welcome? This is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me, he thought groaning loudly and hiding his head under the pillow once more.
His cell phone didn’t stop ringing for one minute. Some calls from Pepper, some from Rhodey and Nat and Sharon, and about a million calls from Steve. Tony ignored all of them. At one point, he sent a simple text to all his friends (except Steve because he was still mad at him) saying he didn’t want to talk about it and turned off his phone. After that, Steve started calling his home. He called almost every hour and every time Jarvis or Ana would pick it up. They would come to Tony’s room and every time the brunette would shake his head and turn around, leaving the butler and his wife to make some excuses.
When Steve finally realized the phone calls wouldn’t work, he started sending other things. On Friday, he sent flowers with a note. I’m sorry, please, let me explain. I love you. All they did was remind Tony of the fact that Steve wanted Sharon, not him. He threw both of them away.
On Saturday, Steve sent a small robot plushie with another note. You mean everything to me. Please, forgive me. I love you. Tony threw away the note and gave the plushie to DUM-E, who happily took it to his charging station and kept it there.
On Sunday, nothing came. No phone call, no gift, no note, nothing. Maybe Steve had finally given up, realized Tony wasn’t worth the hassle and it was better to just take this opportunity to get out of the relationship he never even wanted in the first place. Tony was fine with that. He was fine.
On Monday morning, he got dressed and turned on his cell phone. He sent Rhodey a text, asking for a ride. His best friend promptly answered on my way. Tony took a deep breath, trying to get himself ready to face the day, and walked down the stairs, straight to the kitchen to have some breakfast.
Jarvis and Ana watched, in silence, as he ate some toast and drank some coffee. He could tell they wanted to say something, but were holding themselves back.
“Just say it. Come on”, he huffed, putting his coffee down.
“He told us what happened, dear. I’m very sorry”.
“Indeed we are, master Anthony. But… Perhaps we could give you something to think about?”
Tony nodded, nibbling at his toast.
“You see, master Anthony. Some people are able to choose exactly who they are going to love. Like your mother. She saw your father at a benefit and decided that was the man she was going to marry”.
“Yeah. Bad choice”.
Jarvis wrinkled his nose, as if trying to stop himself from agreeing. “Maybe so, master Anthony, but she made her choice. Other people, like Mrs. Jarvis and myself, are victims of fate”.
“What do you mean?”
“Objectively speaking, there was no reason why Mrs. Jarvis and I should meet. A war was raging outside and I was merely a soldier, unable to afford even a drink at the hotel she worked. But fate intervened”.
“That’s right. The general, who never ate anything other than meat and potatoes, that very night decided to try some local cuisine. He spent the night throwing up and called Mr. Jarvis for help. I was tasked with cleaning up the room. And that’s how we met. Fate”.
“And then you stole a letter of transit and was almost court martialed for her”, Tony replied, grinning.
Jarvis cleared his throat and took Tony’s plate. “Well, some people are worth committing a crime for, master Anthony”, he said, earning himself a kiss on the cheek from his wife.
“So, what you’re saying is Steve and I were meant to be?”
“All I’m saying, master Anthony, is that Mrs. Jarvis and I believe that some people are destined to meet. And sometimes, when people are being stubborn, or clueless, or when the world decides to make it difficult, fate intervenes and puts those people on each other’s paths. What happens after that, well, it is up to them, isn’t it?”
“But… He didn’t want me, Jarvis. He wanted Sharon”.
“Perhaps, in the beginning, master Rogers had a different idea of what love could be. Maybe, before you showed up, love had the face and shape of Miss Carter. And perhaps, when fate put you in his path, he realized love was much different from what he believed it to be”.
“Yeah, but he still didn’t choose me”.
“My dear boy”, Jarvis said with a smile, “He chose you every time he came over to watch, yet again, those silly space movies you love so much. He chose you every time he comforted you after a fight with your father. He chose you when he introduced you to his mother, his only family in this world, as his boyfriend. He chose you when he gave up a scholarship at another school only because he could not bear to be parted from you”.
“How do you know about that?”
“We’re the help, dear. The help knows everything”, Ana said, laughing softly.
“He may not have chosen you at first, Anthony. But he chose you again and again and again for a year. And he kept on choosing you every time he called this house, heartbroken and desperate, and every time he sent a gift with what I can only assume were very remorseful notes. You made each other happy, Anthony. Perhaps you ought to give the young man a chance to prove his love to you”.
Tony didn’t have time to answer. The Imperial March started playing, a sign that Rhodey was waiting for him outside. He smiled at Jarvis and Ana, his way of saying thank you for the talk, thank you for being so good to me, thank you for always looking out for me, and left.
The car ride wasn’t exactly fun. Sharon had spent half of it apologizing to Tony and assuring him she had no interest in Steve (which was fairly obvious since she was dating Pepper). Tony, then, put her mind to rest, saying he didn’t blame her at all and that she had nothing to worry about. They’d been friends since they were in diapers and nothing would change that. That’s when Sharon started sniffing and touching the corner of her eyes, trying to hide the tears.
“Are you crying?”
“No, I have allergies, your cologne is gross”.
The moment they arrived at school, Tony knew something was wrong. He walked in with his friends right behind him and noticed how everybody kept glancing at him. Great, everybody knows what a huge loser I am, he thought, frowning. And that’s when he saw it. A huge piece of paper on the message board that almost took half of it.
I fell in love with you when you came to my games to cheer me on even though you hate football ― yes, Tony, I know you hate football.
Right under the saying was a drawing of a football field with many players. On the side, there was a small brunette cheering and, beside him, a robot (who looked very much like DUM-E) holding a sign that said “Go Team”. Tony smiled.
“Uh, Tones? There’s more of that”.
Tony turned and looked to where Rhodey was pointing. Indeed, the corridor was full of posters with phrases and little drawings. He started walking, slowly, stopping at every single one.
I fell in love with you when we watched Star Wars and I looked at you and you were so excited and so happy it made my heart burst.
A drawing of two figures, a blond and a brunette, pointing at the many spaceships that flew around the paper.
I fell in love with you when you spent five days with me in the ER because my ma was sick ― and you stayed even though they have terrible coffee.
This time, a drawing of a small brunette figure making a face at a cup of coffee while holding hands with the blond little man.
I feel in love with you every time you smiled, every time you laughed.
This one had a very realistic drawing of Tony smiling. It was beautiful. Is that how Steve sees me?, he thought with tears in his eyes.
The posters covered all of the corridor.
… when you introduced me to DUM-E…
… from the first time you called me sweetheart…
… when I was sick and you made me soup ― even thought you burned it…
… every time you called me to tell me about your day…
Tony read every single one of them with a small smile on his face, completely ignoring everyone else who just stood there, watching him. He finally got to the last one.
I fell in love with you the day you kissed me under the bleachers. I was just too stupid to actually notice.
Suddenly, Steve was there, holding flowers and looking very nervous.
“Hi”.
“Hi”, Tony replied, biting his lip.
“I’m sorry. I should have told you. It’s just that… After you kissed me and you told me we should grab a burger, I thought, okay, I’ll tell him the truth at the diner and… I didn’t. Because that day I had the best time of my life. You were funny, and smart, and gorgeous, and damn it, Tony, I was terrified that if I told you, you wouldn’t want to see me ever again. So I didn’t. And I should have. I’m sorry”.
Tony smiled and nodded, taking the flowers. But Steve continued.
“I know you think I didn’t choose you. But, you know, ma used to tell me that sometimes we’re too blinded by the world to actually see what’s right in front of us. So sometimes fate helps. And I think it really was fate who made you cold enough to steal Sharon’s sweater. Because, honestly? I can’t imagine what my life would be like without you. And I thank fate everyday for knowing better than I did. I may not have chosen you that day, Tony, but I swear I’m gonna choose you every day for the rest of my life. Because I love you. I really do. Can you please give me another chance?”
Tony smiled and, instead of using words, just pulled Steve down for a kiss, holding him tight and letting himself be held by him. The people near them started laughing, and cat whistling and clapping. But suddenly, all the noise stopped and the couple heard someone clearing the throats forcefully. They interrupted the kiss, looking for the source.
Vice-Principle Coulson had what seemed to be the ghost of a smile on his lips. “No kissing in the corridors”.
“Oh, come on, you heard the speech”, Bucky complained from the other side of the crowd.
Coulson huffed, shaking his head. “One more kiss only in the corridor, Stark, Rogers. And keep it PG-13. This is not some teen movie High School. This isn’t Hannah Montana”.
“Wait, Coulson watches Hannah Montana?” Steve whispered and Tony tried to swallow a laugh.
But Coulson had, apparently, heard him. “She is a normal teenager by day and an internationally famous singer by night. She’s Batman. What’s not to like?”
While everyone laughed, Coulson shooed the others. Steve smiled down at Tony.
“I’m really happy you forgive me, Tony”.
Tony smiled. “I had no other choice”, he said, and when Steve shot him a confused look, he replied, “Who am I to go against fate, right?”
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mama-m1na · 5 years
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LKI: Chapter 1
                                                     ~~~I~~~
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Warnings: None
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It was a warm, Spring night in Utemelac Prison; however, one cell always managed to stay ice cold.
“What the hell have we told you about using magic, Witch?!” an armored male exclaimed as he struggled to open the door frozen shut.
“Kiss my ass, Warden!” barked a ravenette as her unique eyes were locked onto the book in her lap.
“This is why you’re always in solitary, dammit!” the male exclaimed as the door finally gave way and opened.
“And the way you run your mouth is why you’re still single,” replied the teen who sat on her cot perfectly comfortable in the below freezing temperature.
“Your sister is here to visit you,” muttered the male earning an immediate glare from the female.
“My sisters are locked up here with me,” she growled as she snapped the book shut and placed it under her pillow, “What do you mean?”
“You know what I mean,” the male sighed as he stepped aside to expose the open door, “Come on, Rhamina.”
The shackles around her wrists and ankles rattled as she followed the male down the hallways lit only by the torches on the walls to a room where a gold-clad female sat.
“Rhamina!” the female knight said in happiness as she stood and hugged her almost mirror image.
Both females had tan skin and jet black hair; however, the knight’s was cut extremely short, like a male’s and Rhamina’s hair was long and silky just reaching her upper thighs.
The most iconic parts of each female however, were their eyes. Rhamina’s were brown while the other’s were red but they both shared the gold flecks that seemed to float in their irises.
“Why are you here, Marina?” the prisoner asked in a low tone keeping her arms to her sides, “Better question, why do you keep coming here, Marina?”
“Oh, silly, I came to wish you a happy birthday because I won’t be able to come here tomorrow,” the knight said backing off of her hug, “And I keep coming because I want to make it up to you.”
“For the past near seventeen years I’ve been alive here’s the one thing I’ve learned the hard way,” Rhamina said with a sneer, “Never forgive, never forget. Otherwise you’ll be a tool for the rest of your existence. I will no longer be that way and there is no way you will be forgiven.”
“We really are too similar, Rhamina,” Marina chuckled pitifully as her eyes began to water, “I know that lesson, we learned the first half together you know? I’m fighting a war right now.”
“An unnecessary war,” the younger twin spat, “You’re killing innocent people just so this kingdom can gain more territory to control when the people who live here currently suffer enough.”
“This war has been going on for two years already. One year before we were caught and continuing on through this day,” she continued, “The more money spent on it, the higher the taxes will be. Already most of the people cannot pay them and the more the people on the streets will suffer, the number of those on the streets will increase. And from what I’ve noticed we’re lucky to end up here because we get better housing and more food than the citizens currently. Do you know how fucked up that is? Why exactly did this war start again? Was this kingdom defending or was this kingdom trying to consume more land?”
It went silent after that until the warden returned and said, “It’s lights out, the witch has to return to her cell.”
“Good night, Rhamina, I love you,” Marina said as she stood giving the ravenette another hug.
“Don’t waste those three precious words when you don’t mean them,” the sixteen-year-old hissed as she ripped away and followed the warden back to her cell.
“Why must your words be daggers towards Lady Miyu?” the warden asked without looking back at the ravenette, “she did save your life.”
“And she was the one who endangered it. Not only mine but also the lives of my sisters. Let my words be daggers and may the wounds I inflict never heal.”
The next morning Rhamina was awoken by the sound of her cell lock turning.
“Morning, Witch,” one of the younger guard greeted, “Time for breakfast.”
“Morning, Cuntface,” the ravenette yawned causing the male to sigh, both parties already used to her disrespect to the authorities.
“Heard it’s your birthday, today,” the male said trying to dissipate the silence as he walked her to the cafeteria.
“Awe, how sweet you remembered it’s been one year since I was put in this hell hole,” the ravenette replied while rubbing sleep out of her eyes.
“It’s pretty sad you know?” she asked upon reaching the door, “If we had met in the village we probably would’ve been good friends but can’t change the past.”
Before the guard could reply the teen disappeared in the large room and lined up to get her food.
“Mina!” called a shorter female dashing to stand right next to the ravenette.
“Hello, Chloe,” she greeted grabbing a tray and handing it to her.
“You got put in solitary again.”
“Yep,” Rhamina replied as food got put onto her tray.
“Mina, that’s not good,” the fourteen-year-old said.
“Bitch, deserved it,” the ravenette said nonchalantly with a shrug as she took her tray to the usual table her sisters sat at.
“Mina, you yeeted a guard over the wall during morning time. Hoot!” Chloe said dashing to keep up with the ravenette.
“He was talking shit on a kid who did nothing,” Rhamina scoffed taking her seat to be bombarded by affection from three of the females already there.
“Happy birthday, Bitch!” Kerstin exclaimed as she, Sam, and Tijarah began to smother the now seventeen-year-old.
“Awe, Mina-chan is old now!” Tijarah chirped at the struggling ravenette.
“Fuck off and let me eat dammit!”
“Awe, Mina, you’re such a floof,” Sam cooed completely ignoring the female who just wanted her food.
After a few minutes the other girls sat down as Rhamina glared at them before taking bites of her food.
“Happy Birthday, Mina,” Sophie greeted as she passed a large parcel underneath the table before whispering, “It’s from me, Hannah, and Jaylin.”
“Awe, you guys are too nice,” Rhamina replied managing to secure it in the waistband of her pants, “Also I’m pretty sure I just got more days on solitary.”
“What? How?” Hannah asked.
“You know how it got pretty hot last night?” Rhamina started, “Well, I made it not hot in my cell.”
“God dammit, Mina, we were planning on spending your birthday together!” Sam chuckled.
“Seven Witches of Utemelac, you are summoned by the royal family get your shit!” one of the guard exclaimed.
“The fuck?” each of the girls asked in unison but got their asses up anyway the only one in shackles being the ravenette.
They were led by a large group of royal guards to a carriage which they somehow crammed into to fit.
Chloe was on the floor clinging onto the ravenette’s leg by herself as Rhamina took out the parcel from her waistband.
She then proceeded to unwrap the brown paper and twine that held it closed and smiled at the familiar black book in her hands.
“How were you guys able to get this?” Rhamina asked as she opened it to reveal a deck of oracle cards in the hollowed out portion of the the book.
“Jaelin was able to go to your old house and get it,” Hannah explained as the ravenette could still feel the energy running through the cards.
“Thanks guys,”Rhamina smile while reaching over to give the pair hugs, “But I really wonder why we were called up by the royal family.”
“How much you want to bet it has something to do with Marina?” Tijarah spoke as she looked out the small window attached to the door on her side.
“Wouldn’t be surprised I mean that bitch has been trying to have a solid conversation with Mina for a while,” Sam added, “Even though she is the reason why we got caught anyway.”
“Fucking screw this kingdom, my dudes,” Rhamina sighed as she put the cards back into the book, “They’re so close-minded it hurts.”
It took about half an hour to reach the castle from the prison despite it still being in the capital city.
When the girls arrived they were led into the castle by the guards and on the way they earned stares from the staff and any nobles who were by chance there.
Quickly getting irritated at all the eyes on her Rhamina hissed at her audience who immediately turned away or left the room which earned loud laughs from all of the females.
“Hush up, Witches,” hissed one of the males.
“Eat a dick you know it was funny,” Rhamina replied with a smirk earning a glare.
“Aw, what are you going to do? Kill me? Go ahead but there’s no guarantee I won’t haunt you,” she pushed as they neared the throne room.
“Mina, calm down we don’t want to mess around here,” Hannah warned earning the sad fish face.
As the doors opened the male announced, “Your Highness, the Seven Witches.”
“Thank you, now leave us please,” the king requested as the two ravenettes locked eyes from across the room.
As soon as the door closed Marina stood up and greeted, “Happy birthday, Sister.”
“It was,” Rhamina stated as she and the others walked closer to the throne, “Until I saw you again.”
“Come now don’t be like that,” the King laughed, “I have a proposition for you girls.”
“Mhm, and what would that be?” Tijarah scoffed as Kerstin and Sam not so discreetly kicked her in the shins.
“I’m sure you’ve heard of Ibadora, yes?”
“Yeah,” Sam interjected in a judgemental manner while rolling her eyes, “It doesn’t fucking exist.”
“Funny you should say that am I right, Kitsami Verum Princeps Ibadora?”
Rhamina’s head snapped up at the mention of the name she had not heard since her childhood.
“What other secrets have you exposed now, you idiot?!” she barked at her golden-clad reflection.
“Rhamina, please just listen,” the older twin pleaded noticing the ravenette’s locks slowly start to float in the areas surrounding her body and the temperature drop.
“My proposition is that if you lead us to Ibadora then you will be pardoned of your crime,” the King spoke earning an immediate response.
“Absolutely not,” Rhamina snapped earning a gasp from Marina.
“Excuse me?” the King asked glaring down at the seven teenagers before him.
“Why should she let you have access to Ibadora when you’re such a shitty ruler to your own people?” Sam questioned earning glares from Hannah and Sophie despite the fact they agreed.
“Knowing you, you’d use its resources for another pointless war,” Tijarah added.
“That’s enough!” the King boomed as he rose violently from his throne, “I tried to be reasonable and let you choose correctly on your own; however, it seems that will not be happening.”
“Damn right.”
“Guards!” called the King as armored males entered, “Store them in the dungeons until their voyage tomorrow morning.”
As soon as a hand touched her shoulder Rhamina grabbed the male by the arm and threw him directly at the king.
“Yeet!”
“Y’all bett keep praying to that god of yours because you do not want to see me in hell,” she growled as the male hit a magic barrier set up by Marina.
The clang echoed throughout the dungeons as the cell door was slammed shut.
“You better not freeze the entire fucking cell, Mina,” Sam warned to the girl who had already gathered herself in a back corner under the barred window.
“No promises,” she snickered, “it is pretty hot down here.”
The rest of the girls groaned as the ravenette cackled like the witch she was.
“Can you shut the fuck up?!” one of the other criminals barked from across the hallway.
“You shut the fuck up, Faggot!” Kerstin replied as she through a rock blindly through the cell bars.
Thud! “Ow!”
“Holy shit, I actually hit him!”
That night an advisor to the King went down into the dungeons to speak with the witches.
“For the last time I couldn’t lead anyone to Ibadora even if I wanted to,” hissed the irritated Rhamina.
“And why is that?”
‘Mother fucker I should cut off your fucking dick-’ “Because I don’t have my notes or my relic,” she seethed, “I had to hide them before we were arrested.”
“Then we’ll just have to retrieve them,” the male stated as if nothing were wrong.
‘Bitch.’
“Sounds easy but I for-fucking-got where I hid them,” the ravenette voice with a smirk.
“Both of us know that’s a lie, you’d have to be stupid to forget something like that,” the male sighed, “Now where is it?”
“Fuck you that’s where.”
“…”
“...”
“They aren’t being touched by anyone but me,” Rhamina finally said after the male looked at her like an she was an idiot.
“Fair enough,” he shrugged, “Guard, unlock the door.”
Once the cell door opened Rhamina stepped over her sleeping companions and followed the advisor up the stairs.
“So where exactly did you hide them?” he asked as had a carriage prepared.
“The forest.”
“How cliche.”
“What did you expect?” Rhamina scoffed, “I had a limited amount of time and nowhere else to hide it.”
The trip was silent for the most part with the teen looking out the window at the moon.
Upon arriving to the forest the female led to the advisor and the guard deeper and deeper into the forest until he asked, “Are you sure you know where you’re going?”
“Yes, now shut the fuck up we’re almost there.”
After a few more minutes they came upon a clearing with a large lake in the middle.
“How is this here?” the advisor gasped as he and the guard gaped at the landmark not yet recorded on their maps.
“She only lets those she deems worthy in,” the ravenette said before turning to the large body of water, “Come now, friend, return what I desire.”
Suddenly a woman rose from the center of the water.
She had fair skin, long wavy blue hair, and a flowing white dress.
As they floated across the water towards the ravenette a metal box could be seen in her hands.
Once she left the container in Rhamina’s hands her eyes drifted towards the two males and she gave a sneer before her body turned into water before dropping back into the lake.
Slowly the lake and clearing began to fade back into an endless sea of trees.
“What was-” “I told you already, the Lady of the Lake only lets in those she sees worthy.”
The ride was back was very similar to the one they had taken there the only difference being Rhamina stared down at the box in her hands instead of the moon.
“Alright back in you go,” the guard said opening the cell door for the ravenette.
As she walked back into the cell the male felt the temperature drop a few degrees; however, he missed the smirk on her face while she gripped onto the metal box.
The next morning the girls were awoken by water being poured on them.
“Get up, Witches, you need to get prepped then you’re off,” one of the guards growled.
“Lick my ass,” Rhamina groggily hissed as she began to ring out her hair.
As she stood up she took the metal box into her hands earning the gazes from her sisters.
“You’re actually going to show them?” Sophie whispered recognizing the box from the year prior.
“We’re going to have to see if I can even find it myself,” the ravenette chuckled as the girls were led to a separate wing of the actual castle.
Their confusion only rose when they entered a luxurious bathroom and turned to the guards with raised brows and even more when he unlocked the shackles on Rhamina’s wrists and ankles.
“Clean yourselves up, you’re having breakfast with the Royal Family,” the male explained as he walked out the door, “clothes will be delivered by maids in fifteen minutes.”
It was silent for a few moments as Rhamina looked at the dark marks left on her wrists from trying to escape them so many times.
There would be definite scarring but she couldn’t help but feel at least a bit more free than she had been.
“I call the bath first losers!” Rhamina cheered as she raced towards the marble tub and began to run the water.
As she began to prep a hair mask for herself made from egg, honey, and olive oil the other girls began to start their own cleansing routines.
While the water was warming up Rhamina let her hair absorb the vitamins and proteins soak into her dirty and greasy locks. She had kept it as soft as she could in prison but felt so happy upon being able to return to her usual hair routine prior to getting arrested.
Of course as she ran her hands through the soaked locks she casted small glamours to keep her hair softer and luxurious as it always was.
After about ten minutes she rinsed her hair in the shower area and sank into the now filled tub to shampoo and condition her hair before she let herself completely relax into the warm water.
Her wrists and ankles stung but she could slowly feel the water caress her wounds as if welcoming back a lover, slowly relieving them of their pain.
Five minutes later a few maids came in to leave clothes for the girls which were all black tank tops, black pants, and black boots with golden chains to accent the boots and act as a belt.
“I bet, Mina, is loving the outfit choices right now,” Sam teased as the female was drying herself off.
“True, but I would love them more if those chains were only a fashion statement and didn’t mark us as prisoners,” she replied summoning small gusts of wind to dry her hair.
After everyone got dressed Rhamina took the box in her hands and the others gathered near her.
“Did you already open it?” Kerstin asked looking down at past memories.
“Only to put the cards in it, I haven’t looked at anything else.”
“Well, no time better to look since we’re going to need that shit,” Tijarah said placing a hand on Rhamina’s shoulder.
“You right,” she chuckled placing her right hand over it.
Her hair began to float again as a soft blue light came from under the girl’s hand and the others could feel magic slowly start to fill the room.
When the light died down Rhamina’s hair stopped floating and she moved her hand away and the lid of the box flipped open.
On the top was the book containing oracle cards which Rhamina moved to give view to a red, hardcover book and a necklace with a large, tear drop shaped, aqua colored crystal with a sigil engraved into it strung onto a golden chain.
“Still the same as we left them,” Rhamina smiled as she put on the necklace feeling a new surge of energy flow through her before looking through the pages of the book to see the language only she and her twin could read.
“Lucky the ink didn’t run,” she chuckled before snapping the book shut, “We should get going now.
As soon as the girls exited the bathroom the guard led them to the dining room where they were met with the King, Queen, the three princesses, and Marina already seated at the table.
Around Marina’s neck Rhamina noticed the glint of a red crystal with etchings in it.
“Good to know you didn’t lose it,” Marina smiled cheerily earning a glare from her sister.
“I should be saying that to you considering the fact you easily lost my trust,” Rhamina replied while crossing her arms.
Marina looked sadly at her younger sister eyes widening when she saw the dark marks around her wrists but before she could say anything the Queen said, “Sit please.”
The girls obeyed takings seats as far away from the individuals dressed in bolder colors.
“Might I ask why we are having breakfast with you if we were basically treated like pigs last night?” Rhamina asked as food was placed in front of everyone.
“Well, we wanted to apologize for what happened to you last night,” the Queen spoke, “It was not just for you to be treated that way when you’re helping us with an expedition this large.”
“Really?” Tijarah and Sam asked with cocked brows.
“That is complete and utter bullshit,” Kerstin stated with a growl as the princesses stood up with glares.
“How dare you speak that way to us!” the youngest exclaimed as she slammed her hands down on the table.
“Do you know who you are addressing?!” the middle added only to gasp in horror as she met glowing gold irises.
“I hate when people try to apologize without meaning it,” Rhamina stated with her arms crossed and hair floating as the temperature dropped, “It’s a blatant lie and if there’s one thing we learned in prison it’s how to pick out lies from the truth.”
“You just want to get on our good sides so we don’t sabotage this mission of yours right?” she continued as the royals and Marina looked to the group in front of them with fearful expressions.
Their combined auras melding together with rage, hate, sadness, and betrayal dying the room dark.
“As much as I would love to we wouldn’t dream of it because the whole reason I taught them how to find their magic was to go on a huge adventure together and what bigger adventure is there than finding a lost kingdom?” the ravenette chirped as the room returned to normal and her hair returned to its original position.
With the aura gone the seven females began to eat the luxurious meals in front of them as the others could only watch them in shock of what just happened.
“What’s wrong, Marina?” Rhamina asked eating slower than the other girls, “You’re coming on this expedition too, you should eat for who knows how long it will be before you can get a meal like this again.”
“Holy shit this is so good!” Cough! Cough! Choke! Cough!
“Fucking idiot,” Sam, Rhamina, and Tijarah muttered as Kerstin ate her food then proceeded to choke on it.
About and hour later the girls were led by Marina and the guards to a large ship where they would be for the next few months accompanied by its sister vessel.
“So we know the kingdom was somewhere in the Donnaholm Ocean but we don’t know exactly where,” Marina explained showing the other ravenette a world map.
“That’s true but you didn’t expect a straight shot right?” Rhamina asked looking up at her sister with a raised brow.
“What do you mean?”
“Do you still have your book?” Rhamina asked causing the knight to give her a black book written in the same language as the red book.
Turning to about the fifth page Rhamina read skimmed it before reading out loud, “Eht tsrif tsaeb seil nihtiw eht sretaw fo eci.”
“The first beast lies within the waters of ice,” Marina translated with a confused expression.
“Yes, in order to open the gates of Ibadora we have to fight seven beasts first or did you forget that?” Rhamina spoke clapping the book shut, “Are these ships capable of handling that?”
Rhamina sighed at her sibling’s silence and explained, “The first beast should be somewhere in the Cold Bay.”
“That area is riddled with pirates!”
“You want to find Ibadora don’t you?” Rhamina glowered, “Then suck it up.”
“Mina!” called Chloe from the door.
“What is it, Owl?”
“Are we allowed to use magic?”
“Yes, why?” Marina asked as the ravenette with hair down to her butt narrowed her eyes.
“What the fuck did you retards do?” Rhamina growled.
“It wasn’t me!” Chloe squeaked, “This time..”
“What even happened?” the knight asked hearing crashes and screams from just outside the room they were in.
The three walked out to see a very wet black cat attempting to jump onto either Kerstin or Sam to claw their eyes out.
“Tijarah, calm down!” Sophie called as she and Hannah were trying to pick her up.
“Hell no!” the cat exclaimed, “They fucking dumped water on me with magic!”
“Jesus christ,” Rhamina muttered with a face palm before she stomped her right foot causing four walls of ice to surround the cat and one right in front of Kerstin and Sam so they ran into it, “What the hell did you fucks already do? It’s literally been ten minutes since you could legally use your magic.”
“They fucking dumped water on me!” the cat hissed with its fur raising.
“Why the fuck are you a cat anyway, Tijarah?” Sam retorted rubbing her nose, “I thought you hated cats.”
“I do but the mother fuckers are agile as fuck!” Tijarah cat hissed just before Rhamina picked her up out of the ice box and scratched behind her ears earning a pur.
“Guys, act fucking responsible with your magic,” Rhamina scolded, “And if you were going to get her wet you should have used magic to throw her into the ocean.”
“Mina!” Sophie gasped.
“You know it would’ve been ten times as funny as just dumping water on her.”
“Mina, you traitor!” yowled the cat right before the ravenette used her magic to summon a warm breeze to dry off the feline.
“Okay turn back now,” Rhamina said.
“No. I like being carried.”
Thud “Ow!”
“Looks like not all cats land on their feet,” Rhamina commented as everyone else burst into laughter.
“Hannah!” a male voice called to the red head.
“Jaelin!” she cheered running over to the shorter blonde knight who she started dating in the year they were in prison.
“I didn’t know you were allowed to be on this ship for royal expeditions,” Sophie stated as they were kissing.
“I got permission from Marina,” the blonde answered as he plus the seven girls gave her a pointed look.
“I thought it would make you all feel more comfortable if you had someone familiar to you,” she smiled but Rhamina could tell it was fake.
They were too similar. They knew almost everything about each other and could almost always tell when the other was lying.
‘She is such a two-faced bitch,’ she thought as the glared harder at her twin, ‘So am I but she actually betrayed us. She will never be forgiven. Never.’
~~~Fin. Chapter 1~~~
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