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good-beanswrites · 1 year

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Yor Week Day 5: Family ☕🍵

A quick drabble of Yor and a teen Anya! I just wanted a sweet little snapshot of their daily life post-canon/post-reveals

“Your birthday’s coming up.” Yor stirred her coffee. “Are you busy? Your father and I were thinking of taking you to the aquarium, he said there’s a special event going on the same day.”

“I’m not sure,” Anya leaned her chin in her hands. The pair sat at an outdoor table at the local cafe. “Becky wanted to go out. She and a few friends wanted to spend the day together.”

The aforementioned friend’s sense of fashion had started to rub off on her. Happy to lose her high school uniform on breaks like this, she was dressed in current trends and styles. She’d grown her hair long to style in her own way, refusing help from her friends. Yor never said anything, but she recognized the way the thick braids tucked just at her neck, with curling pink locks framing her face.

Anya’s features scrunched up, lost in thought for a moment. “So...”

She was slowly ridding herself of the habit, but Yor couldn’t help her thoughts from carrying her away in nervousness. Of course the girl’s friends would want to take her out. She thought the aquarium was a good idea – Yuri had loved going too, as a kid. But that was just it, Anya wasn’t a baby anymore. She had to stop thinking she knew how to care for a family just because she’d cared for her brother for a little while. Having a daughter was different.

“That sounds fun,” she forced a smile. Knowing it wasn't the most convincing of looks, she flooded her mind with the thought. She did believe it. It did sound fun. Things with friends were always great. Yor was so happy Anya had such wonderful friends in her life. Anya deserved to have fun with them. “Yes, you should do that!”

Sure enough, she saw Anya’s bright eyes studying her. Though her mind was spilling with positivity, the conflicted look on the girl’s face didn’t lessen.

“The thing is… we’ve been doing a lot as a family recently, and, well…”

Yor’s hands clutched around her mug. Hairline cracks appeared on the side. She willed herself to calm down, but her heart was breaking as much as the cup. It was no wonder her daughter would rather spend the day with others! She’d been too overbearing, too enthusiastic to do lame things. She’d been keeping Anya from being the free teenager she wanted to be.

She’d heard accounts of children growing up too fast, but it was even more painful than she’d expected. It seemed like only yesterday she was threatening parents of students who were insulting Anya’s tiny stature, and now she was grown and running off to make her own birthday plans.

“So it was you that scared Mrs. Greene our first year!”

“What?!” This time, the mug did shatter. Coffee and porcelain shards spread across the cafe table.

“I knew it!” She let out a giggle. “You had papa fooled, though.” Anya handed her a napkin, and helped to mop up the mess. “And mamaaaa…” She tugged on one of her pink curls, looking away.

Yor was surprised; that little gesture was a habit of her own. “What’s wrong?”

“I was going to say… I really want to hang out with you two.”

Her eyebrows raised.

“I just thought it would be silly to cancel on Becky, you know? Since we’ve already done so much together lately. But… the aquarium sounds fun. I really want to spend my birthday with you.”

Yor nodded, trying not to let her face betray her giddiness at the sentiment. “That sounds wonderful!”

The two continued making plans. Yor wanted her to be able to see her friends as well, and there was certainly room for everyone at the aquarium. Anya wanted to make sure the 'special event' wasn't an invention of her workaholic father. The three were used to working cases together, but it was her birthday, after all.

Suddenly, Anya’s eyes narrowed. Her lips twisted into something mischievous. “So… what are you guys getting for my present?”

“I told you, it’s a surprise,” she said as her daughter stared intently.

Her look of triumph immediately turned to horror. She swatted her hands at Yor. “Noooo! Stop that! I don’t need to hear about you and papa making out!”

“Maybe you shouldn't have been snooping.” Yor grinned shamelessly. “Come on, I get to keep one thing from you all year.”

“That’s still gross.” She made a theatrically disgusted face, which only made Yor’s smile soften. “Hey! It's not adorable when I do that.”

“You’re always adorable.”

Anya huffed.

“And also,” Yor grimaced.

“Mm?”

“That whole thing about Charles’ parents stays between us, alright? Your father can never know.”

The girl let out a laugh. “Aw, mama. I'm you're daughter – you know I can keep a secret.”

#yorweek #yor forger #spy x family #anya forger #sxf #thats all i got for the week but thank you sm for putting the event on! :D #i was just saying the other day how yor as a character means a lot to me but for some reason i dont do art for her as much as id want #it was a ton of fun doing some little projects for her :')#i like the idea of anya using her powers regularly but responsibly around her parents #and yor and loid finding productive ways to guard against it if needed #and i know it probably wouldnt happen because the parents are too protective over anya to knowingly put her in danger #but im so obsessed with the whole family working jobs together as the coolest wackiest team #with goofy family issues in the middle of life or death moments like the Incredibles or something #i will also never be over the gag or yor being oblivious to how ridiculously strong she is lmao #it didnt fit the story but if anya heard yor discounting all the work she did caring for yuri shed totally stand up for her #'mama you did an Amazing job being a literal mom at age 16!!! yuri is just fucked up for unrelated reasons.' 'huh??'#fanfic

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macey-wacey · 9 months

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Ngl i think ch 106 is the hardest i've laughed at this manga in a while. Felt good, felt like old times 😌

#i knew tsukasa would save it 😌#he is a boy of many talents #but also it was just a straight up goofy fun time and i miss that #the whole severance arc took sooooooo long and even tho it did have good lore bits it got kind of boring #but this arc #this arc has been great #funny AND has had a little yugu twin lore too so far #i hope they keep it up #toilet bound hanako kun #mac mumbles

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exastriis · 6 months

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suzie frequently experiencing vivid hallucinations of a doomed future, blood pooling at their feet threatening to drown them at their desk but then their alarm goes off and they stand up to take a smoke break. mr. america i'll be dealing with the horrors a bit after lunch thanks. the pack of marlboro reds in my purse is calling my name. regards, suzie 👍 — sent from my iPhone

#assistants have this almost divine quality to them. they did begin from the idea of guardian angels #half are prophetic and half are telepathic and none of them are aware of it. the ones that are have been labelled as #insane or otherwise. likely got a dismissal as well #hws assistantverse #i'm a little wary of implementing this facet into this universe because hh i don't want to deviate too much from silly goofy country anime #but at the same time it's /my/ worldbuilding therefore /my/ rules !!!#musings #info [ suzie k. ]#that last tag is there for worldbuilding stuff shhfjf

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bicon-crange · 10 months

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THAT NEURODIVERGENT IN SCHOOL POST IS FUCKING ME UP SO BAD IM RETHINKING MY WHOLE LIFE.

why. like why why. WHY am i so impossible to get rid of. im having like. vivid flashbacks to this kid in high school that my god i think i was just BOTHERING. like he was so explicit like "do not touch me. i hate you. i hate being around you." and i would just be like Haha Thats SO Funny I'm going to poke your arm now. :] like just. was NOT born understanding boundaries at all and also just. not understanding anything.

#HOW DID I EVER NOT GET THROWN OFF A BUILDING #also flashback to when one of my high school friends kept punching me and i was like 'hey. stop that or im going to punch you back.' and #she didnt so i socked her in the stomach and that was TOO FAR and that whole group stopped talking to me #like im. i. how have i ever gotten any friends ever.#like just got told TODAY that one of my old friends was probably a bad one bc I DIDNT KNOW THAT. TAKING A BOOK OUT OF SOMEONES HAND #AND THROWING IT IN THE TRASH WHENEVER YOU TRY TO READ IT... WAS NOT A SILLY GOOFY FRIEND THING #SHE DID THAT WHENEVER I READ A BOOK SHE DIDNT LIKE #bro. how did i. how am i LIVING.#gripping my head in my FUCKING hands today #SO MANY DIFFERENT PEOPLE WERE LIKE FUCK OFF LEAVE ME ALONE AND I JUST. looped my little arm in theirs and was like haha Ok Bestie :]#AND I JUST NEVER LEFT THEM ALONE. FOR YEARS!!! HELPPPP

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sw-trashship · 9 months

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My fave part of Robin's interactions with Sheriff/Prince Jonh is that it doesn't matter how much he disrespect both of them or how much he likes use their egos to get closer to them, he's always so EAGER ON HAVING PHYSICAL CONTACT with them. This fox kissed Jonh's paw, got close enough to take off his robe and even gave him an awkward long hand shake. AND HE UNBUCKLED SHERIFF'S BELT WHILE SINGING FOR HIM BOY THERE IS SOMETHING YOU WANT TO TELL US???

#i cannot said if he is just way too touch starved or simply fruity #but tbh knowing him he probably needs to touch A LOT he did the same with Little Jonh and Maid Marian #i mean with Maid Marian is more subject but there's a part in the song 'love' when he leans to kiss her and then she moves her head away #and he got goofy excited for ONE kiss in the CHEEK #i honestly think he really likes physical affection but due both his outlaw life and his own polite manners he tries to hid that side of him #i also think Robin only decided to cross dressing and compliment Jonh only to see if he was gay lmao

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mymelodyisme · 1 year

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The interaction probably went something like this

#it’s never nice to hear that your crush on someone is obvious #I can’t keep mine secret 😔 I act super goofy #the crush I liked for years told me he knew I had gotten a crush on him because I repeated the exact same actions from the first time we #really got to talk #I came in prepared with a whole camera album (in phone) of photos I thought he would like and I wanted to share cause they reminded me of hi #HE WAS INTO SONIC #IT WAS ALL SOMIC RELATED PHOTOS #after he mentioned it I never did it again #i just liked that he actually payed attention to me and was really nice to mE (he then preceded to be kind of a self interested that year)#😓 I may love a little too hard it’s super cringey #Stardew Valley: Poochencia Farm #scribbles #myshane♥️#farmer mys

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ziracona · 2 years

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It drives me crazy when people are like “Anders’ personality is totally different in DA2 than Awakening! He’s so much less goofy and happy and fun! Justice must have changed his personality to make him that way!!” Bitch he’s depressed.

#HES JUST DEPRESSED #like he’s /exactly/ the same. I played those back to back. he’s different he’s! but his /self/ isn’t. his mood is. he’s goofy and fun in #Awakening. Da2 I didn’t see him smile once. UNTIL I said ‘ooooh that’s why you’ve got a sexy brooding thing going’ and he was so surprised #he almost laughed. he’s just sad and angry baby girl he’s literally got the same value and personality load out just it’s been a few bad #years. I used to be more funny and happy before I went through massive trauma and betrayal too #also he’s nothing like Justice? did you ever talk to the man? captain literal? Goofy McSuperhero? my belvoed? Justice has Sten reactions but #they’re sincere instead of him being a little shit #dragon age 2 #dragon age awakening #the boys are fine leave them alone; they’re good for each other

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nonsense-is-everywhere · 2 months

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I just want to play with dolls and make them have dramatic fights again. I’d settle for playing with sticks and rocks, and naming them different things.

If only I wasn’t shackled by the standards I put on myself to act my age, and the urge to hide my weaknesses from peering eyes in fear of judgement.

If the average man ever saw me at my full childlike whimsy, their head would explode.

#die die die die die #I want to play with dolls again #I want to make my plushies fight with my sisters plushies.#The airplane game. All the toys would go on a airplane and that was the whole game.#I want to play again.#I want to run around and play tag and hide and seek.#Please this isn’t right.#opps my bad. did this get a little too goofy.#sorry my bad guys. got a little too silly.#who gave me typing permissions?#fr though just let me frolic around.#golly #love y’all #even though this will probably never be seen. I love all the silly humans on this website #I am so full of love #text post

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ghost-with-a-teacup · 1 year

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𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭'𝐬 𝐈𝐧 𝐁𝐞𝐭𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐧

Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x F!Reader

Summary: Everyone at HQ was convinced there was something going on between you and Miguel. Just...no one knew what. But one group of spiders were determined to figure it out.

Warnings: None! Just a lot of goofiness and a whole lot of fluff :3

When you have a superhuman with superior senses, they’re bound to be perceptive to their surroundings. Now when you have an entire lobby the size of multiple football fields filled with superhumans with superior senses, very few things will go unnoticed.

It’s why people very quickly realize that you and Miguel have…something between the two of you. It’s just that no one is quite sure what.

Camaraderie? Maybe, you were one of the first spiders to join the society.

Friendship? Perhaps, but it was known that Miguel wasn’t one to do friends. Not with the amount of loss he has gone through.

A relationship? This one seemed the most unplausible. Miguel was, well, Miguel. Stoick, cold and calculating. Meanwhile, you were you.

You had a light that drew people in, kindness that knew no bounds and warmth like a fire on a cold winter’s day.

Everyone knew the saying ‘opposites attract’, but it was like comparing night and day with the two of you. Regardless, a small little group within the society were set on trying to figure the two of you out.

“Ain’t no way the two are together, she’s too good for him!” Hobie argues, his legs kicked up on the table in front of him.

“I don’t know, maybe that’s why they work together. Because she makes him better?” Miles says, but his tone of voice failed to hide his skepticism.

“I think you should just leave the two of them be. Besides, what happens if you figure it out or not anyway?” Peter says, feeding Mayday as he does. Immediately a chorus of arguments breaks out from the group.

“OKAY! Okay, forget I asked,” he says with a shake of his head, while Mayday just laughs at the commotion.

They spot the two of you walking into the cafeteria making conversation none of them could make out.

“Look at them,” Gwen says, “have you ever seen the guy happier than he is with her?” she asks, and Hobie snorts.

“C’mon mate, you call that happy? Mans got that frown tattooed on his face, can he even be happy?” he says, but they all continue watching intently.

You glance over to the table they were surrounding, and they all brush off your gaze pretending as though they weren’t just studying the two of you like specimens under a microscope.

You wave your hand, a bright smile on your face while Miguel only glances over for a moment before continuing to walk. You jog to catch up to him, grabbing a tray and picking up things you wanted for lunch.

They watch as they see Miguel pick up the empanada, the last one left. He pauses for a split second, holding it before turning to place it on your tray. Almost as though they were straight out of a cartoon, they freeze at the interaction.

You seem to be slightly surprised as you, saying something to him but he only brushes you off before continuing on.

“Did…that just happen?” Pavitr asks. Everyone at HQ was aware of Miguel’s fondness for the food (even if he did hurl one right at Miles when they first met), there was no way he would give one away so easily for just anyone, right?

“Somebody pinch me,” Gwen says, and Hobie jumps at the request.

“OW!”

Miguel never lets anyone help him out when he’s injured. That was just a known fact. He could walk into HQ battered and bruised and wouldn’t even look in the infirmary’s direction once. After depending on himself for so long, he wasn’t going to stop now. Besides, what were First Aid kits for after all?

The only way he was going to the infirmary was if someone dragged his unconscious body there themselves.

Well, unless you were there.

“Miguel O’Hara I swear to god, you better get your ass to the infirmary or so help me I will tie you up and drag you through the halls myself,” you say sternly as you both reemerge in the Lobby. The rest of the Spiders there continued with what they were doing, but their attention was zeroed in on you both.

“I’m fine,” he says, glaring at you as if trying to say ‘Just try’. Had you been anyone else, you would have backed down by now but you didn’t.

“You wanna test me right now? That was a nasty hit, I will not be letting it get infected under my watch,” you retort, and he puffs.

“This is nothing, I’ve dealt with worse,” he scoffs, and in an instant your finger shoots out, making contact with the side that got hit with the anomaly’s flames. Miguel can’t help the sharp intake of breath as the pain from the impact hits him.

Your eyebrow raises, an expression of disbelief on your face before it softens. Murmuring softly, you say something that only he can hear.

For a moment he studies your face before sighing, finally relenting. With a triumphant smile, you place a hand on the man’s broad back, leading him towards the infirmary with a gentle but firm hand.

There, Pavitr is laying in bed recovering from an awry mission of his own. The doctors had ordered bedrest for the next 2 hours at least. Superior healing or not, they were not going to risk it. So there he lay, slinging his golden bangles up and down bored before he hears the two of you come in.

“Mr. O’Hara-" a doctor’s voice can be heard, but he is quickly interrupted.

“She’s got it from here,” he says, Miguel’s tone final. A small “yes, sir” can be heard before footsteps fade away, the doctor’s office door closing once more.

“You know, you should really let the professionals help you,” your voice can be heard.

“You dragged me here, you can deal with the consequences,” he says, and you just laugh fondly before your voices quieten, murmuring too quietly for Pavitr to hear.

Curiosity builds as he recalls the conversation he and his friends had, and before he can stop himself he shifts silently to the side, just enough to be able to catch a glimpse of you both from the small gap between the hospital curtain and the wall.

There, Miguel sat on the bed, a disgruntled expression on his face but his eyes were soft as he watched you fuss over his side.

He only watches for a few seconds before pulling away, this being a clear invasion of privacy, and his boss’ privacy no less.

It wasn’t going to stop him from telling everyone else though.

“This is a bad idea. This is a really, really bad idea,” Miles says, grasping onto the ceiling like his life depended on it.

“It’s only a bad idea if we get caught, so Shut. Up,” Gwen says sharply, hanging from her place on the ceiling as they watched the fight from above.

Gwen had come up with the mighty fine idea of sneaking into a mission between the two of you. It wasn’t often that it happened, Miguel more often than not only went on missions with only Lyla by his side. But when he needed a partner, it was always you.

“Why did you have to bring me with you,” he whispers, “Miguel already doesn’t like me. He doesn’t need more of a reason to.”

“Because I needed backup and you can turn invisible. And let’s be real, Hobie would be laughing his ass off getting us caught, Peter would bring Mayday which would get us caught, and Pavitr is already on a mission, now shhh,” she whispers, turning back to watching the scene below.

You swung from pillar to pillar in the abandoned factory with practiced ease, a carefree laugh escaping your lips as Miguel stands on the ground fiddling with his watch.

“The anomaly’s last known location was here,” Lyla’s voice echoes out, and you let out a sigh.

“Why can’t villains have easy powers. Maybe a giant blob that is easy to take down? Why do they have to be so complicated? What’s this one again, a freaky shadow monster?” you think out loud.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Miguel retorts, glancing up toward you for a moment before turning back to Lyla. “Do a scan of the place, will you?”

“What do we say~” Lyla responds, and you giggle softly while Miguel huffs.

“Please,” he mutters.

“What was that?”

“Please, Lyla,” he says a little louder now, irritation growing in his voice.

“Already done,” the AI snickers, and he groans out loud as your laughter bounces off of the walls, a fist held out for Lyla to bump.

“The two of you will be the death of me,” he says lowly.

“Oh, don’t be like that, grumps. You’d be too stubborn to die,” you retort before tensing up, the hairs on the back of your neck rising with the familiar feeling of your heightened senses at work. The moment you sling yourself up is the moment a loud thud sounds out from where you once stood.

“Oh, I forgot to mention that the anomaly was in the far right corner,” Lyla says before disappearing.

“I really need to do a rewrite of her code,” Miguel mutters to himself.

In your previous spot emerges a dark figure, plumes of smoke emerging and dissipating from its form and allowing it to disappear into the shadows with ease.

With a simple nod, you get to work. Like a well-oiled machine, you work in practiced synchrony, bounding across the walls and slinging webs.

And just like that the anomaly is captured, the force field around it effectively trapping it for the ride back to HQ so it can be sent back to its own universe.

“That was…kinda lame,” you snicker, pulling off your mask

“Told you so,” Miguel says as he opens up a portal for you both, dragging the anomaly behind him.

“Don’t say that to me,” you pout.

“What, can’t handle the truth?” he retorts, a smirk playing across his lips as your bickering voices fade through the portal.

“…was that a smile,” Gwen asks as she watches the spot where they both had stood.

“Was that what it was?” Miles asks, a shudder racking through his body.

It was late at night at the HQ, and at this time everyone else had already gone back to their own universes. The few that lingered were the ones finishing up after a late-night mission.

Or, you were Peter B. Parker frantically searching through the kitchen for a bottle of milk for Mayday after a playdate with a select few spiders that went on for way longer than expected.

Mayday was an easy baby. Always happy and smiling, but that all disappears when she was hungry and you did not want a spider baby on a rampage.

“Alright, alright, give Daddy a few seconds to warm up your milk please?” Peter pleads as Mayday continues to babble angrily, crawling all over him.

She pauses for a moment, attention drawn elsewhere as she hangs off of her father’s back before leaping.

“Hey, lil spider!” You say with a laugh, catching her in your arms. “What are you doing here so late?” you ask.

“Playdate with Miles, Gwen and Hobie. Time really flew and she refused to leave until now,” Peter sighs tiredly, and you pat him on the back before putting her up onto your shoulders. “What are you doing here so late?”

You shrug, grabbing two mugs from the cupboard.

“Working late. Like you said, time really flew,” you say, but Peter knew that wasn’t the full truth.

“Working so hard that you need two cups of coffee?” he asks, holding out the bottle for Mayday to take, which is what she does happily as she snuggles up in her father’s arms.

“What can I say, caffeine doesn’t really work on me,” you grin, pouring the coffee from the machine. “Goodnight, Peter, Mayday,” you say, ruffling her red hair fondly.

And as quickly as you appeared, you disappear.

People didn’t often disturb the big boss man Miguel when he was working. Not if you wanted to stay on his good side.

It was even less often that someone barges into his room full of screens as he monitors the Archno-Humanoid Polymultiverse, let alone a group of them.

“We heard you talking to someone! And laughing,” Gwen says hesitantly as if she couldn’t even believe it herself. But she was invested in figuring out what the deal was between the two of you now.

“Well, do you see anyone around?” Miguel deadpans, his arms wide and gesturing around broadly. You could barely stifle the giggle as you sat on a beam high up on the ceiling, going unnoticed.

“W-well, no…But!” she says, and Miguel raises an eyebrow which makes Gwen shrink in her spot slightly before recovering. “But we heard you. There was someone here, wasn’t there?”

Hobie, ever the perceptive one tracks his eyes along the ceiling before spotting you swinging your legs with an amused look on your face. It seemed as though no one else had noticed though.

Miguel watches Hobie spot you and his eyes narrow in his direction, as if saying ‘I dare you to say anything’ to which the spider only raises his hands in mock surrender.

“No. There wasn't." He says, his tone final. "If that’s all you’re here for, I have important work to get to. So why don’t you go bother someone else, yeah?”

“I give up,” Gwen says, slumping in her chair. “We’re never going to figure it out.”

“Figure what out?” Jess asks, walking up to the group.

“Whether or not there is something going on between those two,” Miles says, nodding towards you and Miguel talking over in the corner of the room.

Jessica only hums, a knowing look in her eyes but she doesn’t say anything. Only asks a simple question.

“What makes you think so?”

“Everyone here knows that there’s something there, even if they want to admit it or not. She’s one of the few people he tolerates, they’re together almost all the time and he actually seems happy around her,” Gwen reasons.

“You could have just asked, you know,” you say, coming up on their conversation with an amused look on your face.

Their expressions range from flustered to simply amused and you can’t help the laughter that bubbles up as you make eye contact with Jess.

“And to answer the question,” you reach down your suit, pulling out a simple chain with a ring dangling off of the end.

“We’re actually married.”

The group goes silent for a moment, eyes wide as they stare at the necklace in your hands, trying to process your words.

Then, all hell breaks loose.

A/N: Hehe, I'm quite happy with this one :3 This is my first attempt at writing Miguel, sorry if I butchered him but I am absolutely hyperfixating on him after seeing ATSV in theatres yesterday.

Based on the prompt by @imslightlycreative though slightly changed :)) I hope you all enjoyed <3

Part two out now!! Read it here.

#miguel o’hara x reader #miguel o'hara #across the spider verse spoilers #across the spiderverse #spiderman across the spiderverse #spiderman 2099 #spiderman #miguel x reader #miguel ohara x reader #spiderverse x reader #miguel o hara #spiderman 2099 x reader #marvel

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imjustkindahere666-blog · 1 year

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Not me thinking that my LoZ hyperfixation hasn’t been that long only to find art that I drew when I was about 10 to 11- (probably 11?)

It turns out I’ve been hyperfixating on LoZ for a very long time now-

#how has my handwriting not improved at all #and neither has my art #okay maybe my art did improve #but only a little #i still don’t know how to tag #legend of zelda #traditional art #old art #Also it’s weird seeing the page not as cluttered #I forgot that I didn’t always squeeze as much art onto a page as I could #It’s weird to look at honestly #Sheerow #What a goofy little maybe bird #I actually got ALBW recently too #I think that’s pretty funny

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eternity-death · 4 months

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Penacony Reactions to you spanking them

No TW’s I think. Just sillies being silly. Established relationship with Reader in all these hc’s.

—————

Hanabi

Head snaps 180° at you and you scream.

She’s traumatized you and now you will never do it again.

This doesn’t stop her from getting you back, though. And she’ll do it in public to make it worse. It’s not a one-and-done deal either, it becomes a regular thing.

You’ve just sentenced yourself to a life of sore-booty and humiliation. Was it really worth it?

Black Swan

Stares at you.

Her expression is a little hard to read and the longer she looks at you the more you feel implored to apologize.

She’s not mad though, she’s actually rather amused. And she’s getting even more entertainment by watching you squirm.

Eventually she gives and just chuckles. If you’ll allow her, then she’ll give you a nice tap on the butt too.

Sampo

He does that one goofy (Mickey mouse) scream.

Very animated reaction. Jumps 10 feet off the ground and covers his behind. He looks back at you like a kicked puppy but you know it’s all fake.

Sniffles and says smthn like, “How could you do this to your best bud, Sampo?”

Gets you back when you least expect it. Like you actually scream bloody murder because your guard is down and you can’t hear him sneak up on you bc he’s light on his feet. It doesn’t matter if you’re in public either. Be very afraid.

Aventurine

“Woah! Getting a little frisky, eh?”

If you’ve got something separating you two like a chair or a counter, he will chase you around it to reach you. Spanks you back, harder, with zero hesitation.

He starts tapping your butt as a regular thing afterwards. Almost like a greeting.

“Hey babe.” Then a light slap. When he feels extra mischievous he’ll grab it.

Acheron

You are unable to slap her booty because she catches your hand before it makes contact.

Just kind of looks at you and goes, “What are you doing.”

You explain to her that spanking is a sort of gesture between close companions. She doesn’t quite get it but decides to just go with it.

Later on, when she greets you, she strikes her hand down on your behind so hard that your teeth clatter. She asks if she did it right with such a hopeful tone, that you can’t find it in yourself to tell her that shattering someone’s pelvis is not part of the gesture. (When she does find out that she’s hurt you she apologizes deeply and coddles you)

Dr. Ratio

Lets out a high pitched yelp.

Gives you the most scandalized look and defensively rubs his tush.

“Did you really just do what I think you did?”

Strategizes a way to get you back. He has a blackboard with physics equations for the perfect angle and fall of his hand, pinned papers and calendars with your schedule and his, etc. He’s terrible at hiding his intentions too. When the time comes for his revenge you already anticipate it. What you didn’t anticipate was how strong he was. You guess those biceps aren’t just for show.

Firefly

Why would you ever? What kind of monster are you?

She yelps and just stares at you; hands covering her behind, face flushed, and her mouth agape.

Apologize.

Sam

You have a death wish.

Another one who catches your hand before you can spank. He just puts your hand back in your lap and goes, “No.”

He actually just doesn’t want you to hurt yourself. His… butt… isn’t very soft, you see.

If you want him to, he’ll lightly tap yours back.

March 7nth

Gasps and launches herself at you with full intention of getting you back.

It turns into a chase, where you run in circles around the gazebo until she gets too tired and gives up.

You laugh about it but later forget. Little do you know, March has been scheming ever since.

“AHA!” You feel a harsh slap against your behind and yelp. The vendor you were talking to looks at you and your girlfriend as if you’ve both grown an extra head. She laughs victoriously, “See? I told you payback was coming!”

Robin

“Oh!!!” Gasps and covers herself. She’s a little freaked out at first but once she see’s it’s you she giggles.

You don’t really expect her to spank you back but she does. With the same amount of force that you used.

It kinda escalates into a competition where you two see who can land the most spanks in one day. Just don’t do it in front of her brother.

You’re losing btw.

Sunday

Do NOT spank him in public. He will be very crossed with you. Not funny did not laugh.

You may proceed with the spank if you are in private though.

He actually squeaks when you do. Then once the initial shock wears off he laughs, incredibly amused by you. Doesn’t say it but he plans on returning the favor.

When he does get you back you don’t expect it. You’re probably cooking or marking off the calendar when he passes you and goes, “Good morning, my love.” And then he slaps your butt. Moderate strength, enough to make you yelp but not enough to sting.

#hsr x reader #sunday x reader #honkai star rail x reader #Sampo x reader #Hanabi x reader #sparkle x reader #black swan x reader #Robin x reader #dr. ratio x reader #veritas ratio x reader #Acheron x reader #firefly x reader #Sam x reader #march 7nth x reader #if you’re like ‘hey I’ve seen smthn similar to this before for genshin’ that was probably me on my other acc #aventurine x reader

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weirdmageddon · 9 months

Text

i love these tags this person is so right

actually, can you imagine if dave was raised by B1 roxy?

i wanna get into this actually

(ok i had to spend a few hours rewriting this because IT DIDNT FUCKING SAVE AFTER FIVE HOURS OF WRITING WHEN MY COMPUTER UPDATED WHILE I WAS AFK so it would mean a lot to show this post some appreciation. i LOVEEE hearing what other people have to say)

even though these things mom does are presented in an extravagant, kitsch, jokey way, her intentions always came from a place of sincerity. she is simply Funnie

but rose reads too far into it and assumes things that aren't there, that her mother is passive-aggressively feigning interest in rose's interests simply because the things she does are so extra. "why do all of this if not to mock me"

im telling you right now if dave lived in this household he wouldn't assume antagonism, he'd go,

don’t forget who LITERALLY patented tangible jpeg artifacts as their post-scratch adult self and scattered shitty scummed up statue of liberties all over the planet. theres no way some of that overboard artful shit wasnt post-ironic / circling back around to genuine funny sincerity

dave's natural state is funny sincerity like roxy. he's had the natural capacity for this type of humor from the start and this is the direction he goes towards when he grows out of his brother's shadow by the end of the comic. dave and roxy share an earnest “so bad its good” type of humor

(lots more under the cut; the length of this meta analysis just got unwieldly with all the pictures and whatnot)

despite the alcoholism, roxy is a supportive mother. she's not the ideal guardian but hells of a lot more supportive of her kid than bro is. if she knew dave's interests she would totally indulge in them with some over the top silly goofy haha shit as a genuine gesture simply because she loves him

rose isn't too keen on it though. but she is more similar to dirk in her natural state of thinking of overthinking shit and assuming the worst, like the tags said

and yes dave got the sweet cuddly yet sometimes backhanded ouppy gene from roxy, probably even moreso lol

roxy's even said rose "sounds like girl dirk"

side tangent here, but this is something i wanna talk about.

i dont think bro should ever be in custody of children ever but if theres anyone who would be up to the task it's rose probably. i know she'd be able to keep up with him. not only does she have a defined personality (dave is more malleable and absorbs his environment like a sponge), if anyone can pick apart B1 dirk's batshit brain and probably be right on the money it's her. lil cal has been pumping patriarchal nonsense into bro's head and rose would be able to bring the fucking facts to the table without losing her own and being a living example of a badass little girl. i also don't think bro would try to force masculine roles onto rose like he did with dave, seeing as she is a girl, so she would actually have more of a leg up and get some passes that dave was never afforded. and rose wouldn't stand idly and accept any bullshit; she is no doormat. and i think this would earn bro's respect

but anyway, from this, couldn't we conclude roxy "sounds like girl dave"?

yeah okay. we havent even gotten into their penchant for funny typos or misspeaks, deliberate or otherwise

so, dave's environment

the sentiment "god you hope you can be as good as your bro at this some day" might have been genuine at the time when he idolized bro but of course he's not able to express that in any sort of sincere fashion because he's in dirk's fucking household. and this level 10 irony shit isnt doing dave any favors

his role models were the Internet and a vague idea of what Bro was like. So he built up his facade based on irony–not the literary definition of irony, as Rose might be quick to point out, but a popular concept of irony based on the idea that things that didn’t make sense actually made sense in some roundabout way. As a master of irony, Dave probably reasoned, he could see in a way other people couldn’t why a world that was scary and didn’t make sense really did make sense, and could therefore convince those people that he was superior to them. And he would wield his knowledge to maintain the appearance of superiority by calling everything ironic and pretending he didn’t care about things that didn’t make sense, and he would use walls of vaguely rhyming words to keep everyone at arm’s length so they wouldn’t discover his insecurities (source)

roxy's style is the embodiment of post-irony. being raised by mom lalonde would be like being raised by joel vinesauce ok

what can i say ….. (getting meta about this actually, hussie got these jpeg wizard wallpapers from a spyware website. link takes some time to load because internet archive)

rose is quick to read post-irony as actually being a joke/insincere, which in bro's case would be true. but i believe dave's natural instinct, outside of the influence of bro, is to read post-irony as genuine, which is exactly how mom serves it. we see this as early as act 3 from him; he understands her motives better than rose does herself:

and in act 6 intermission 2 i think it's pretty clear

but the thing is, it's always genuine from her. dave wouldn't have to second guess it because he's not one to naturally second guess someone's sincerity; that was learned due to his bro being virtually unassailable

there two types of ironies at play here:

seems like a joke, is actually genuine (roxy)

doesnt seem like a joke, is actually a joke (dirk)

you can make the argument that the second is is more psychologically destructive because it makes you question the reality of what is genuine sentiment and what isn't. dave never knew what was genuine and what was irony so he just sort of existed in this sincerity-ironic limbo and always did the opposite of what he genuinely felt on principle even if it always did originate from a genuine place.

"it just a joke bro i was just being ironic i dont actually x" is so much more trust-breaking and psychologically damaging than "wait are you being serious" / "i am being so fucking fr rn davy gravy" / "ok thats actually pretty fucking awesome. giant ass wizard statue" / "RIGHT"

how much about dave would change do you think? his character arc would be completely different for one thing, i think he'd have it good aside from mom's alcohol issues. he'd be left with the sweet and funny parts of him that we see at the end of the comic. the fake coolguy stuff is out, but this remains. this is dave in his element and we see it as early as act 1

he'd probably have no shades growing up in the lalonde residence* either cause those were given to him by bro straight out of the crater as an extension of his own cool image. and john gave dave ben stiller’s aviators for his 13th birthday to replace them so he could “spread his wings”

dave said he was wearing them for the ironies but i kind of doubt it. maybe post-irony but there was some reacharound to it being genuine because dave never put those pointy anime shades on his face again.

*though... it’s kind of hard to imagine him without his shades at all? B2 dave still got stiller’s shades from stiller himself so maybe getting them is a universal constant. i can imagine mom getting him them as a birthday gift cause shes pretty wealthy and probably could buy it out in an auction. but also itd be cool if john still gave him it as a gift

dave is actually a lot more genuine and easy to read than he lets on even when grappling with his upbringing with B1 dirk (again, see this post). this can be seen all throughout he comic but a good example is the evolution of thoughts about his interest in the preserved dead things in his room:

if B1 roxy was dave's guardian he probably WOULD have pursued paleontology because she wouldve indulged him in it and probably find it cool and worthwhile to pursue, instead of allowing dave to flounder under ironic detachment, being poisoned by irony to the point of gaslighting himself into believing he doesnt actually believe he thinks this shit is cool. even if it was indulged in this such a way; a superficially kitsch and ironic appearing presentation, it comes from a genuine place and inspires genuine interest. just read the comments.

basically, i think if B1 roxy raised dave, their relationship would have a surface level appearance of being bizarre or over-the-top but they’d have an unsaid mutual understanding that it’s completely in earnest and just build on each other's funny and absurd gestures of affection. rather than seeing it as one-upping each other, it'd more like collaboration of some silly bullshit that you take a step back and look at full and just say, "fucking incredible"

speaking of paleontology, mom had the proto-ectobiology lab. maybe they'd be able to use the equipment to appearify paradox ghost imprints of the dead shit to create paradox clones of things from the cambrian era??? sounds like a fun mother son bonding activity. and theyd actually put the sciencey shit in the household to use

oh god i know exactly the kinds of music shed listen too also growing up as a teen in the 80s. she on that (post)-punk/art rock/new wave/new romantic mtv stuff. XTC shit fr. this is a B-52S HOUSEHOLD. maybe the associates for the campy melodramatic flair. so he gets to keep the record on his shirt cause he is an enjoyer of the shit in her vinyl collection. dave would still gravitate towards musical expression and music itself but of more variety outside of just rap, with an 80s-90s, even 70s flavor due to mom’s influence. see this for perhaps a glimpse. she probably visited new york city a lot for business trips and because the music scene was cool as hell around that time, imports came straight from jfk airport, she probably got in on that a bit and have remnants in the form of vinyls and cassettes. in this way she could be distributing void to dave (influencing him with forgotten / presently irrelevant music). now he can REALLY rave about bands none of his friends have heard of. “hey davy grvay watcha listenin to” (he holds up vinyl cover) “omg snakefinger”

btw dave lalonde would look like this to me

#homestuck #homestuck meta #dave strider #mom lalonde #roxy lalonde #hs #strilonde guardian swap

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