#except it is really So very unhealthy for him. a toxic kind of relationship. where he's largely grown up being the parent to his own mom | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

angelofthenight · 2 years

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Polite Stranger (Purge Leader) x Reader: Yan!Headcanons

Warnings: Yandere, Dark themes, Symptoms of psychopathy, Toxic friendship, Unhealthy relationship, Degradation, Stalking, Spying, Trespassing, Possessiveness, Obsessiveness, Jealousy, Manipulation, Gaslighting, Superiority complex, Invasion of privacy, Sexual context, Power imbalance, Unwanted touching, Murder, Mention of sexual harassment and assault, Home invasion, Honestly the purge is its own warning, Rushed writing at the end

Word Count: 3.2k

(Reader’s gender is never specified)

Part 2

♡ It all started junior year of highschool private highschool for the upper class

♡ You weren’t upper class at all, fitting into average middle class, but you got in because you were intellectually and academically faster than the public school board

♡ You didn’t necessarily consider yourself as a genius, you were just a faster learner than your peers and your school wasn't even that good at teaching new things

♡ So you were pretty much average at the new school

♡ It was first day of junior year and the two of you were seated next to each other, the first time you exchanged words was a little near the end of class when you were trying to find your next class on the small paper map you held under the table

♡ You politely asked him for assistance and because you asked so nicely, he escorted you and guided you through the school. For the whole week he basically had you follow him around like a dog so he could show you the ropes of private school

♡ He liked that you needed him and relied on him, it gave him an ego stroke so he decided to keep you around and that’s how you two basically became best friends (except to you the reason was that you guys just got along perfectly)

♡ He would always tell you how hopeless you’d be without him, but since he said it so cockily you thought he was just being funny (like how most best friends were) and never thought he was actually being serious

♡ He could also be a little cruel sometimes with teasing you about your financial class

♡ To him, you were his little play thing… until he started getting more possessive of his play thing. In fact he couldn’t even stand the thought of other people talking to you

♡ That’s when the stalking began

♡ He didn’t consider it stalking though, he thought of it more as ‘keeping an eye on you’

♡ The two of you were basically conjoined at the hip during passing periods, lunches, free period, and your two shared classes (one a day) but there were the other five classes where you two were apart

♡ The classes you both had but at different times, he transferred to be in yours. And the other classes he couldn’t change he would leave his class early to stand outside yours until the bell rang

♡ You got a little overwhelmed with his constant presence, it felt suffocating but you never said anything about it

♡ He got to see for himself who talked to you and who you talked to and he mentally took notes on your behavior for each and every one to get a feel for who you liked and disliked; he mentally took notes on each of their behaviors towards you so he knew who to worry about

♡ If anyone got too close to you he took care of it and got his revenge. He’d either sabotage them or humiliate them with dug up dirt he had on them or blackmail them into stop talking to you or if they really liked you then he would frame them for something that would get them kicked out of the school

♡ You were his little toy to play with, no one else's

♡ And he did it all so sneakily that you never once suspected a thing

♡ He basically socially isolates you which wasn’t very hard since you saw majority of the school as stuck up, prissy, rich assholes (even he was one but he grew on you)

♡ But keeping an eye on you at school wasn’t enough

♡ For the first time, you two began hanging out outside of school. Tbh it’s always his idea but he kind of convinces or gaslights you into thinking it was your idea, or he kinda manipulates or tricks you into directly asking

♡ You feared that he would be shot caller for what you did but he surprisingly preferred you picking, wanting to know where middle class teens go for fun

♡ You hung out a little more than your boundaries would’ve liked so you jokingly called him clingy which resulted in him laughing in your face, knocking your self esteem down a little

♡ But even that wasn’t enough, time you spent without his generous and protecting company still existed

♡ So he stalked you in your spare time without your knowledge

♡ He still didn’t consider it stalking though, he was just observing you. Like a form of people watching but just focusing on one specific person

♡ He learned the shops and cafes and diners you went to consistently

♡ This led to him following you home which would lead to him spying on you through your blinds

♡ Until watching you wasn’t enough, he needed to touch

♡ So he snuck into your room when you were absent and dug through all of your belongings, running his hands all over your room. It amused him how much smaller your room was in comparison to his, just adding to his superiority complex toward you. He wanted to explore more of your house but just decided to wait until you invited him to your home yourself, he knew you eventually would due to his ranking title as your best friend

♡ He smirked to himself and turned to your nightstand. A collage of photos were set on the wall of you with two other girls and one of the photos was of you three as kids holding up matching silver heart necklaces. The same necklace that rested around your lampshade, the ‘B’ in BFF etched onto the center. His brows pierced together. What the hell?

♡ No. He was your best friend. Who were those lowlife pigs you shared air with?!

♡ It was at that moment of rage and jealousy that he realized how he truly felt about you, he was in love with you

♡ He didn’t confess to you right away, in his cruel mind you had to earn it. But that didn’t mean his possessiveness didn’t worsen. He got more cruel with keeping others away from you and pushed your boundaries even more, he even pushed boundaries you didn’t even know he pushed like violating your privacy. He learned your phone passcode so he could go through your phone when you weren’t looking and that allowed him to learn your email login

♡ After knowing how easy it was sneak into your room he began doing it much more often, thus forming a more obsessive infatuation with you

“Why don’t you ever invite me to your house? Are you embarrassed?”

“Oh… um. There’s nothing special at my place and I just didn’t think you were interested.”

“Well, I am.”

♡ Since he’s so politely blatant, he gets you into inviting him yourself to your house where he gets to meet your parents and explore the parts of your home beyond your bedroom. As you two hang around in your room he asks about the two girls on your wall

“Oh them? They’ve been my best friends since 3rd grade, they go to the public school I used to go to.”

♡ He turns to you with a dark look in his eyes, one that you’ve grown familiar with but it still unsettled you each time. “Aren’t I your best friend?”

♡ You shifted in an uncomfortable state. “Well… I can have more than one best friend.” You dodged the question out of nervousness

♡ He took a step toward you and you took one back which led your knees right into the edge of your bed, causing you to fall into a seated position. He took another step closer so that one foot was in between yours and he planted his hands on either side of the bed beside your hips. He bent his knees to lean his face closer to yours as you leaned back

♡ “Or maybe you see me as something more.” He breathed huskily on your reddening face, he never got that physically close before

♡ You were so caught off guard and flustered that you couldn’t even think of any words to say, lips parted and breath barely present in your chest. He didn’t care nor realize your silence before he leaned in to press his lips into yours, a deepness in the movement of his lips

♡ The way he kissed you was so intoxicating and satisfying that no matter how you felt about him you kissed back and closed your eyes just as he did

♡ The kiss was slow yet heated up into a sensual manner as he placed one hand on the side of your neck with his thumb caressing your jawline and his other hand wrapped around the hip area near the top of your thigh

♡ He rocked his head in and out of the warm kiss before he reattached his lips to the crook of your neck, a soft flinched gasp squeezing your throat. The hand that was once on your neck traveled under your armpit to grip onto your shoulder from behind as he worked on the other one. He attacked your neck in smooth kisses then sucking kisses, opening his mouth to let your soft flesh enter the hot encompass of his mouth and wet dragging tongue

♡ Your mewling moans encouraged his abuse on your neck that was beginning to fade into hickeys. His desperate sucks transitioned into lovebites, startling you as he bit down on your sensitive skin with his teeth. His fingers on your shoulder gripped harder as if he was an animal chomping down on its dinner, the growls emitting from his throat as he sensually chewed adding onto the comparison

♡ He finally released your neck, which was now littered with hickeys and dents from lovebites, to run a hand through your hair. You breathed like you were high with flushed cheeks and swollen lips. He smirked devilishly as he leaned closer to your face with his fingers still tangled up in your locks

♡ “So are we going to be something more?” He asked with such cockiness in his voice

♡ If you reject him, he’ll manipulate you where you stand into agreeing; twisting your own words around. So no matter your answer, you’re entering a relationship with him

♡ And then he gets worse; mentally and behaviorally

♡ Now he’s taking small items from your bedroom and condoning it as just a couples thing

♡ Don’t think you’re now spared from his teasing just because of your relationship, in fact I’d say even those get worse

♡ He teases you about the smallest things which just makes you insecure about the smallest things you never paid much mind to before. But then he’ll do a complete 180 and lovebomb you and praise the same things he previously mocked. Sometimes it just makes you think you’re crazy

♡ He just loves to toy with you so much, whether it be confusing you in a very unhealthy way or just playing with your feelings. He gets such a kick out of it, it’s too much fun. Either way it just makes you depend on him even more, wanting approval/validation and relying on him to raise your self esteem

♡ He also gets ridiculously more clingy (practically breathing down your neck constantly and practically being your new shadow) and touchy. Always having a hand on your waist in the school hallways, always having a hand on your thigh during classes. Even if when you ask him to stop he won’t. In fact, he’d probably mock you about asking him to stop

♡ When the first purge since your relationship comes, he kills your two little friends you just love so much

♡ He’ll never forget the blind vulnerability you displayed in his arms the night after as you cried in grief, a language his psychopathic mind couldn’t understand. He felt a buzz in his chest as you pathetically clung to him as if he wasn’t the one that had hacked a hatchet through their faces multiple hours ago. He loved you weak and trembling in his embrace with him in the role as your vicious protector, it gave him such a pleasured rush

♡ Around 6 months later when you were in his bedroom while he ran out of the room real quick. He walks in on you on your knees beside his open closet door looking up at him with paralyzed horror laced in your features, mouth hung open and his beloved purge mask in your trembling fingers. He stared down at you, not knowing what exactly he was feeling in his gut

♡ “Please tell me this isn’t yours or-or this is a joke or… I’m just hallucinating” You begged with eyes welling up with thick tears and your throat growing raw

♡ He didn’t say anything, not really feeling the sympathetic need to lie. Now that he thought about, he didn’t really care whether you knew or not

♡ You almost couldn’t believe it. “You… you purge?” You recognized the exact mask in your hands as the one the killer from the security tapes wore as he split your friends’ face into two with a shiny axe. “And you… it was you. You killed them… muh-my friends.”

♡ A feeling finally invaded his empty chest from the mention of those pests he thought he’d hear the last of after he exterminated them. “It was legal” He stated with an angered tone of voice; strict when it came to his human right to participate on purge night

♡ “That doesn’t make it right! Are you fucking kidding me!? What the fuck is wrong with you!? Why would you kill my best friends!” You snapped at him, rising to your feet. “I cried to you! You knew how much they meant to me! You knew how much it affected me because you sat there and watched like a fucking psychopath!”

♡ He didn’t even attempt to comfort you nor try to justify his actions. Just stood there, staring down at you with eyes that said “are you done whining now?”

♡ You threw his mask to the ground and marched up to him to say in his face, “We’re fucking done. You are dead to me and I never want to see you ever again”. You attempted to walk past him but he roughly flung his arm out to stop you. He laughed and looked at you humoredly. “You’re not leaving me” He said with that shit-eating grin of his

♡ You glared, “Watch me”. You shoved through his arm but only made it to the hallway but he threw his body against you, making your back smack hard into the wall as one of the hands pinned your dominant wrist and the other gripped around your jaw to force you to look at him. His smile grew malicious and fear began to settle into your composure. “I said… you’re not leaving me.”

♡ You were afraid, so very afraid of the way he looked down at you, so very afraid of him with the new knowledge of his participation of America’s “all crime is legal” night. But your desire to get out of this relationship with him now rather than later was stronger than your horror. So you jabbed your knee upwards into his groin, making him wheeze in pain loosen his hold on you

♡ You shoved him by the shoulders to the ground and attempted to make a run for it from there but he latched his arms tightly around your leg from the ground. You gasped and looked down at him as he looked up to you with something you had never seen in his eyes before; vulnerable desperacy. “Don’t leave me, (Y/n)! Don’t you dare leave me, baby!” He cried out but his undertone still dipped in anger. “We are meant to be together and I will never let you leave me! I… I love you!” He confessed for the first time

♡ You didn’t let his manipulative tactics work on you this time. “Let-” you kicked your foot to his face to force him to unhand your leg, “-GO!” And as he clutched his bleeding nose, you bolted from his house

♡ Things got so much more worse after that

♡ He got so much worse after that

♡ His stalking grew more intense, he was breaking into your house to try to talk to you, he would harass and assault you any chance he got, just every one of his red flags amplified to a very dangerous level. He would not leave you alone, you could not get rid of him

♡ And there’s only so much a restraining order could do against a wealthy white man

♡ You had drop out of school, you had to move out of town, you bought a taser and a mace, you had to save up money to buy security systems. And you would prepare yourself for the upcoming Purge night

♡ You and him both knew that purge night meant that all efforts to keep him away would fall apart. No laws would exist to protect you from him. And for the first handful of purges, you had escaped him just by a hair out of pure luck

♡ But those purges were the closest experience to hell you had ever been through

♡ He had brutally but legally murdered everyone you cared about and butchered anyone who offered you the slightest bit of protection and slaughtered anyone who took a single step in his way from taking what was rightfully his, even if it was his own family and friends

♡ He had demolished any sanctuary you hid in with the help of his machines, there was no lock that would keep him away for longer than a minute. In fact, he liked the locks (only on purge night of course), he liked the challenge of chasing you. He loved this cruel game of cat and mouse. He loved when you ran, when you tried to fight back, it was so fun for him!

♡ You once foolishly begged for hospitality and protection from a family who looked to have very solid defenses on their home. But you got all four of them killed

♡ Because he always found you, no matter where you ran and no matter where you hid. He hunted you like a dog. You knew you couldn’t beat him every Purge, and you were petrified of the Purge where he’d ambush you when you least expected it. You feared that inevitable night more than anything ever

♡ For him, he could hardly wait for that night. Where he’d finally swoop you back up into his arms again and then bring you to his bedroom to make love to you to finally release all of his pent up fiery passion. He would drink in your moans as you’d cling to him while you’d experience the best pleasure and you’d regret ever leaving him in the first place

♡ So for as long as he has a pulse, he will dedicate every second of his life to tracking you down and dragging you back home with him

♡ All because of his love for you

#the purge #the purge 2013 #purge #purge 2013 #polite stranger #polite leader #purge leader #yandere #reader insert #polite stranger x reader #polite leader x reader #purge leader x reader #purge x reader #the purge x reader #rhys wakefield #horror #slasher #slasher x reader #yandere x reader

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mksbigg3stfan · 1 month

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so umm umm you know, when you have free time ummm RADESSE /explode

i need opinions, the only ones i see are extremely neutral or simple hate cough cough, i would love to read what you think moot!!

Of course, sure thing !!

Radar x Jesse

Kind of unusual ship, I haven't seen much content of it. If I'm being honest, I didn't know it was a ship until I saw your blog! If Radesse were to have a food comparison like the other ships, I'd say it's some kind of rare fruit, like cherimoya or something, because of how unusual it is. Not bad, just unusual. (Apparently they taste super good!!)

I can say that you seem to characterize Radar pretty well! People in the MCSM fandom seem to sort of ... infantalize (?) And kind of baby Radar even though he's a grown adult. One that has tattoos and has had multiple jobs before ... So I'd say a lot of the hate for the ship (and any ship with Radar) comes from the infantalization of him, which makes people think of him as a younger, more impressionable, "must be protected character." Which doesn't really make sense. Radar hates being talked down to, and he probably wouldn't appreciate being treated like a kid when he's an independent adult.

Besides that, Radar had never considered himself an adventurous person. He's always loved hearing legends, admiring heroes and foes from afar. But when he follows Jesse, Radar discovers his talent with long-range weapons and that he is much stronger than he thinks. By the end of MCSM, Radar has grown into himself much more and is a lot more confident, plus less anxious.

You honestly make super cute Radesse art, and I love your Lapis Lazuli Au !! (jwjejrnanns) Honestly, it's kind of cute how in your AU they settle down together in the future, and Lapis is really cute! Domestic fluffy stuff is always adorable in my opinion, and your art is so warm and bright that it makes every piece feel inviting and like a piece into the little world you made for after MCSM ends.

Jesse is good at cooperating with people, and they are a really inviting, helpful person. I see Jesse as a more adventurous, can't stay down person, but I like how you portrayed them as more of a like, "I've travelled the sntire world, and had 1000s of adventures and quests, so now I'm ready to settle down (except I'm like 30-35)." It kinds of reminds me of how Jack and Nurm settled down together.

Overall, I think your Radesse is really cute! But, like all ships, it has a few flaws. Not that it isn't cute! In game, if you take too long to make a choice when talking to Radar, Jesse defaults to a pretty cold response. There's also the issue with the idolization of Jesse Radar has going on. It's kind of unhealthy for him and Jesse, especially when it makes Jesse uncomfortable.

Besides that, I think Radesse is just something that couldn't happen during in-game time. It would have to take place after MCSM ends, and Radar gets over his idolization of Jesse and starts seeing them as just a person that he admires. (Also, Jesse's thirst for adventure dying down.) After a year or two, maybe more, I think I can see where you're coming from onJesse coming back and settling down, and them slowburning into admiring each other. Like Jesse admiring the confidence Radar has grown, and how he's taken care of Beacontown, and Radar finding Jesse themself admirable, not their heroic deeds. But, I just think again, it's a ship that would need to happen after MCSM ends to make sense.

I don't really ship Radesse or hate it, so I don't have a super strong opinion on how their relationship should be. (Maybe besides it having to happen after the game ends if it happens lol) But, if it happens after game, I'd say it would be slightly toxic at first, but they'd probably find their place. In game run time though, I can't really see it happening.

In its defense, it definitely isn't a proship or just something that totally doesn't make sense like ... idk, Jesse x witherstorm ??? And people seem to hate it very much, but there's nothing like, inherently problematic about it, it seems like? Anyways, keep making your Lapis Lazuli au and the Radesse because tbh it's really cute !! ( ´∀｀ )b

#mcsm #minecraft story mode #minecraftstorymode #mcsm jesse #mcsm radar #radar mcsm #jesse mcsm

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writingforatwistedworld · 2 years

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Phantom bride event-Seeing you in formal wear (suit/wedding dress/whatever) Pt. 2

Characters: Sebek Zigvolt, Trey Clover, Floyd Leech

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, wounds, marriage, marking, violence, unhealthy relationship

Sebek... Sebek with his loud glory is very loud the second you... WAIT HE IS SILENT??!

Yes, I have to congratulate you because from now on you aren't “just” the Overseer but also Sebeks pacifier in human version

What am I supposed to say? You look dashing darling!

But, lets be a bit more critical of the situation than just “a dream come true-bla bla”

This is the self-aware au, what did you except? Unicorns and rainbows?

So Sebek sees you, and already remembers the lessons which Lilia gave him as a child on how to court someone

*Sigh* and if you know anything about Fae in the self-aware au courting someone (doesn't matter if he is only half one) them that it's a bit... uh... unhealthy? Toxic? Overall not good? (I seriously can't find words for this)

So Sebek remembers, and he remembers that despite there being so many differences between his mother and father (like everything) their marriage is a dream come true for them

The silent Sebek is way scarier than our usual loud one because you know, if he's silent then he is thinking a lot

And we don't want them to think too much because who knows with what they will come up with

So here is the plan, he will *ahem* “court” you (in truth it's just very glamorous kidnapping), marry you and will make sure that you are so “happy” that you will never want to leave

You see where I am going with this?

The princess can be happy that he is so deep in thought and frozen or otherwise he would be challenging her to a duel with real swords and even though Lilia says they are still inexperienced I'm sure those arms can do some serious damage, ghost or not

Your best option is to ask Lilia for help here (*gasp* I know) because as much as he loves Sebek and Silver, only his obsession with you beats Malleus wishes

So yeah, you have the choice between a very old, wise, and probably OP fae who will never let you go again and a half-fae who will destroy your eardrums with every single word they say

Not the best options but would you rather die from that kiss?

Kind Trey who looks out for the freshmen is suddenly not so kind anymore

It's really hard to see but look into his eyes while he stares at the ghost. You see that bloodlust? Yes, that's him

You see, I think Trey is one of those that believe in eternal love between married partners so this sight of you makes his happy beyond possibility

But then he remembers that 1. He is not the one you swear your undying love to and 2. This all should belong to HIM

He is always smiling, always there to lend an ear others and this is the reward for all of that??!

Be is mad and believe me, I am genuinely scared of people who smile so much like he does because these people who are the scariest when they snap

And he will snap. 100%

Twisted Wonderland is a world filled to the brim with magic, you can't tell me there aren't spells which can be used to exorcise ghosts

He makes reminders in his head right now to find one once he is free and then get rid of that pest

At this point you shouldn't ask for her hand but ask her to take her stuff, leave Idia behind and start to run

There is no amount of guards which could stop Trey once a certain point is reached and that point isn't just stepped upon but flung into the nether

On a lighter note, the wedding cake at your and his wedding will be like the Mona Lisa of cakes

And also, no one besides you, him and someone who is needed to make the whole thing final will attend

Why? Well, he already got “your first” stolen so he will make sure that no one can “steal” the sight of your second from him

Mhm should have left the whole thing to those who aren't called “Overseer”

But what can I say? Enjoy the cake? Because I know that it will taste divine

This one is screaming the whole time

No, I'm not joking, he will scream and bite anyone who tries to make him shut up

Poor eel is so helpless that this is his only defense

But unlike the others before, he does actual damage

You have ever seen those teeth??!!

Floyd wanted to be the one to marry you and not some... some... spoiled princess!

His entire life he looked up to you hoping to have the slightest chance to be noticed by you...

and then some blue wannabe princess takes that hope from him

It seems like the friendly approach doesn't work

The second he is free he will snatch you up and make you drink that potion he once stole from Azul

What it does? Oh well you know, just shackling you forever to the ocean so you could never escape him

But that is just one part

The other is him making sure that everyone knows you belong to him the second they lay eyes upon you

So what does he do? Probably not something you would suspect but... those teeth....

You have a pretty neck and shoulders dear, a but too unmarked for his tastes

You catch my drift, right?

So yes, be prepared to feel more like property instead of a person because that is your life in a nutshell from that point onwards

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toxicpineapple · 1 year

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hi, I don't know if you want to tell us more about this but... I saw an old post you wrote about toxic and healthy oumota. I was curious about how you'd write them differently, if you feel like the portrayal of the ship isn't satisfying sometimes.

it's been months since i got this ask. maybe even over a year. but the reason i left it sitting was because i wasn't sure how to articulate my feelings and thoughts and i think i've formulated properly what i want to say now.

so there are two main angles people can come from when they portray oumota in a way that i personally feel is unhealthy. both have to do with reducing either kaito or kokichi's agency.

from kokichi's end, if they kind of soften/wooby kokichi, they'll make him really wimpy and weak and focus on his small bone structure or whatever. really pick on him in the narrative and have kaito charging in to be overprotective and take care of him. a lot of times also they'll have kaito kind of acting as the. what do you call that. "seme"? except in the sense that they'll really like have kaito treat kokichi like an object, often times initiating kisses or more without asking or elaborating. a lot of size play in that dynamic, where kaito will kind of take advantage of kokichi's smaller stature. but this isn't portrayed as a bad thing i need to emphasise, like, it's written as romantic and so cute when in reality it's kinda terrifying-- especially when they'll also write kaito as overprotective and aggressive towards the others who interact with kokichi. so basically you can tell that op assigned them "girl" and "boy" roles.

on kaito's end, you'll see a lot of content where kaito is really really stupid, and wrong, and kokichi is very right. a lot of stuff playing on the idea that kaito is like, a massive hypocrite or coward and everything he puts on is a facade. i don't necessarily take issue with the read that kaito's hero complex is exaggerated -- i personally feel that he projects outwards to hide an inferiority complex -- but sometimes people push it a step too far. kaito's earnest and goofy and he likes helping people, and kokichi is NOT completely correct about him. kokichi misunderstands kaito in a lot of ways. kaito's not wrong about everything and oumota should not exist for kokichi to tell kaito "your entire ideology is flawed, come join my emo band". like i think they work because they challenge each other and if you take away that dynamic on kokichi's end and just make the pairing kaito getting schooled then i'm not into it. i also don't really like this thing oumota fans will do where they won't like. let kaito have friends lol. not that i think he has to keep any particular friends, but he should have friends outside kokichi and his relationship with kokichi. otherwise he's just kinda isolated.

what i want for oumota is for them to have a really strong back and forth. they have conflicting viewpoints in such a way where both of them is correct on the issues where the other is wrong. that's COOL because it means there's mad growth potential for them while interacting. they can challenge each other to think beyond what they've always assumed and they can also cover each other's blind spots in tough situations. i like that! it's cool.

it's important to me also that they HAVE failed each other in many ways. kokichi targets kaito's biggest insecurity repeatedly and intentionally because he fundamentally misunderstands who kaito is. kaito does not understand kokichi from the get go and struggles repeatedly to see what he's really saying, even when he says it outright. there are failures. but then they still choose to work together, they find a common ground and learn to understand each other and when everything seems hopeless, they stand up together against the killing game. that makes them stronger in my eyes than two people who have always been in agreement. this is the RIGHT choice and they BOTH think so. middle ground.

so what i look for in healthy oumota is push and pull from both sides. they're both right. they're both wrong. they can mess up and hurt each other, but i want to see them BOTH apologise and take responsibility; it can't just be kaito saying it, and kokichi DOES have to change how he communicates sometimes in order for kaito to feel seen and heard. simultaneously though, i don't want kokichi to have to change who he is or stop lying just for the relationship to work. i think oumota is strong because regardless, kaito will always chase after kokichi, he will always keep falling for the jokes-- and also, because kaito is a liar in as much the same way as kokichi is. his free time events are full of tall tales just like the kind kokichi is always telling. shuichi just sees them as more benign because they're hoeric. they're silly and childish and i want kaito to see what he does and what kokichi does aren't all that different.

i want them to play together!!! banter!!! wrestle!!!! kokichi pulls pranks on kaito and kaito chases him down and tickles him. they launch into these mad stories about whatever bullshit they made up today and leave everyone else just kind of struggling to keep up. kaito wants a partner who will challenge him and always leave him trying to get the next point. kokichi wants someone who will chase him to the ends of the earth and meet his eyes when he shows who he is. they ARE each other's ideals, they ARE the best for each other.

just. you know. some people aren't really sure how to write that.

#oumota #momota kaito #ouma kokichi

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linagram · 6 months

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hi i'm in the mood to infodump and i almost started typing something that is a very big spoiler to the second timeline so instead i'll talk about something that we already know which is. sanada brothers' relationship.

so i think i haven't talked about any of the possible t3 covers (except mentioning yurika's deco cover on my main) but like. yes i've said it before and i'll say it again rabbit girl outfit kei will be real in like. a few months probably. i mean i've drawn him before so he's already kinda real

HOWEVER what i didn't mention is that i was thinking of giving him mozaik role as his possible guilty cover! but then he got absolutely hit by that innosweep so yeah. no kei mozaik role.

but i listened to it again earlier and i was like. hold on. hold on. these lyrics are. kinda kei AND eiji coded.

obviously, it would have a more platonic meaning in this case (it's so hard to work with deco's songs sometimes, it's like i KNOW pretty much all of his songs are about romance and i'm like. b-but what if i need something different..), but like. look at this. please stay in this space with me.

so you're staying with me here? good!

so, let's point out some of the kei-coded lyrics.

"i compared the fluid that leaked out of the wound to love". YEAH. yeah, this is kei with his "pain means love btw <3" beliefs. if you're wondering how and why did he even start to think so, in his first interrogation he says that it's what eiji and kei's mother always used to say and i overall kinda tried to imply that he's VERY attached to his mom. (i am planning to make a post about her and eiko's mother soon!)

"you gave me a sweet lie that "it's okay to be a coward", have i been able to escape?" even though eiji is the younger brother, he's the one who always protected kei from other people and kei is actually very dependent on him, i mean, he literally calls him his older brother sometimes. "wait who did he have to protect kei from" first of all, this hasn't really been talked about before, but i think it's easy to guess that kei always kinda had this weird kid kind of reputation. which would lead to. yeah. bullying. and also.. um. mrs sanada believed that pain means love and kei also thinks that she loved him more than she loved eiji. i think that's enough information. (it also should be mentioned that right now eiji is 19 and kei is 25 and the age difference is actually quite big, which means that when 16 y/o kei was in trouble, A LITERAL 10 YEAR OLD TRIED TO PROTECT HIM. AND KEI CALLED HIM HIS OLDER BROTHER EVEN THEN. DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHY EIJI IS LIKE THIS NOW.)

"what's wrong with killing me, me who you hate" well. i think we all know this. no matter how much eiji says that he hates kei, no matter how messed up their relationship is and no matter how badly kei treated (and still does) him, eiji simply wouldn't be able to actually kill him. yes, he punished and tortured him, but he wouldn't be brave enough to actually sentence him to death.

now, about eiji-coded lyrics.

"i will be sick of you by the end of this", "i will drink up all the tears that you gave me". pretty self-explanatory, but the second one can also refer to the fact that even though eiji does recognize that the way kei treated him was abusive and unhealthy, he still can't let him go for some reason, so sadly, he will just continue to ruin himself while claiming that he hates him and kei deserves to die and also visiting him and checking up on him every day, "just because he wants to see kei in pain", yeah, sure. he cried so many tears because of kei, but he will still drink them up.

"is this called "i loved you"? where i struggle to cling to you". again. eiji, sweetie, make up your mind. this is the part of eiji and kei's relationship that is so heartbreaking to me because even though eiji himself knows how toxic their relationship is, he's still attached to kei and still cares about him. i don't know, something about him still trying to take care of kei who abused him both physically and emotionally and believing that kei still needs him (and he's not wrong) is so. 😔😔😔

and the lyrics that fit both of them!

"and yet, i love you", "what's wrong with me loving you, bound together, so nobody can touch you" these two are so codependent, it's scary. and actually, i SHOULD talk more about how much these two depend on each other because if you think about it, both kei and eiji try to fight for independence in their own way. kei's way of fighting is having as many relationships (that last like a week or two) as possible, almost as if saying "yes i DO get bitches, but i can easily leave them as soon as i'm bored, i am sooooo cool" and doing illegal and creepy things such as. yeah. literally taking pics of people being tortured for money and his own personal amusement, like he's saying "aren't i so cool for doing this. aren't you afraid of me. please say that you are, give me a reason to feel like i'm in control here". meanwhile eiji not only hates criminals because he associates them with kei, but he also punishes them in the worst ways possible and enjoys it because he wants to feel like he can do something himself, without anyone's help, and he wants to prove that he's strong. look at him, a 16 y/o kid got a horrible head injury because of him and it's possible that he will die soon! eiji is so strong, isn't he? he even had enough courage to punish his own brother, who already had scars and was afraid of eiji touching him! he also forced yurika to relive the days of being a maid even though she hated every second of it! w-what do you mean, that's.. bad?

so yeah, both sanada brothers just want to be seen as cool and mature and be treated like adults, except they.. don't even know what being an adult is like. their mother is a toymaker who was basically a child pretending to be a grown-up, eiji was forced to become an older brother figure even before he went to middle school, kei literally sees everything through rose-colored glasses, eiji believes that violence is the only way to show that he's stronger than others and kei tends to unconsciously age regress when he's panicking or in an unsafe situation. yeah, these two want to and will beat each other up. and yes, they love each other in the most twisted way.

"this is fate as well, it will disappear, disappear, our world of love" SO U H . i feel like if i say anything, it will be a spoiler, so let me just say this. both sanada brothers were/are/will lose something that feels like home to them. kei misses ruka and he committed his crime exactly because his world started to fall apart and he started to think that ruka will be taken away from him (surprisingly, he actually did it not in a yandere way and it wasn't really a result of obsession, but him realizing that he cares about him. after all, he did say in his first interrogation that "he thinks he really did love that person".). and we know that all of this is going to end one day, but we don't know what is going to happen to the guards after their job is done. and considering that eiji finally feels like he has found what he was made for and what he likes to do.. yeah. yeah, it's possible that his world is going to disappear as well.

my brain is running out of brain juices, so let me just show these screenshots. do you see my vision

#uhhhh if you guys want me to ramble about everyone's covers and smth like that let me know!#i do try to explain why i picked each song in their profiles but it's usually very short though i usually have a lot more thoughts about it #because yes it's obvious that rabbit hole is very keicore because of the themes and aesthetic and everything #BUT THERE'S ACTUALLY MORE TO THAT SO LIKE. YEAH. WATCH ME PSYCHOANALYZE RABBIT GIRL KEI HSJDKASS #anyway y'all wanna talk about how eiji's t1 cover is animal so its like both of them have animal symbolism going on #both of them try to be something they're not. it's like both of them are wild animals who are pretending to be human and trying to fit in.#eiji is the “barefaced animal who does it wild even if it's ugly and can't do sit and can't even do stay”#meanwhile kei is saying “if you get lonely find anybody just get lucky” and he “loathed to love but it gave him life”#anyway in the end i think they should bond over their fursonas or something #📱linagram timeline 📱#🍓prisoner 005: sanada kei 🍓#🗡️guard 001: sanada eiji 🗡️

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owenryder · 1 year

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THE INSPIRATION BEHIND... OWEN RYDER ANDERSON

boston accent / matt nathanson 🎧

the good part / ajr 🎧

young blood / noah kahan 🎧

ryder is ... a gucci tux in a crowded room, skyscrapers, a Boston accent, waking up in a city he's never been in before, hot girls on his arm at parties and a hot boy offering him coffee the next morning, a smear of blue-green paint under a lock of light brown hair, the hum of a sport car's engine, bottles of alcohol on a hotel's dresser top, the product of wealth and toxicity, independence.

There really are no fictional characters or people in my life that inspired Owen Ryder Anderson; he is a product of me wanting to play someone completely different that would fit into this idea that I had of a young character moving to a town that was basically the polar opposite of every place that he had called home growing up... for a girl. Past that, he sort of created himself.

Of course Ryder has some influences from pop culture; characters with big egos but secret, soft hearts. Boys that drank a little too much at parties and got vulnerable, or wheeled around in sports cars but made people wear their seatbelts. Cocky, arrogant types with all the money in the world who didn't really live like it in their every day life. Snappy dressers who looked straight off the runway, but then threw down at the bowling alley in jeans and a t-shirt. Someone famous online for doing something stupid, and probably never creating that magic again... but people still followed them anyway, because why not? Dacre Montgomery himself inspired Ryder, of course -- mostly that era where he was just becoming famous and doing all sorts of photoshoots where he kind of looked like that guy you would hate, but then secretly swoon over. And his artistic side, too, except I went in the direction of abstract painting over poetry.

I knew that I wanted Ryder to have a sort of complicated, borderline unhealthy home life. But nothing triggering or uncomfortable. The kind of life that a lot of rich kids probably grow up with: mom and dad's families pressured them to get married because they each had money and high society standing and would have a blessed rich people union, but they probably absolutely definitely should not have been allowed to reproduce... but did. And named him Owen because they have no taste. I wanted him to have a dad that was sort of an enigma. Does he work in finance? Is he a businessman? Maybe he really actually is in the mafia? Who knows! He's the kind of person who doesn't have much of a personality outside of money -- he uses money to get what he wants and he has no shame in it and no shame in what it brings him, what it allows him to do. His father slept around before, during and after his marriage to his mother and never batted an eye. And his mother... typical socialite mom. Probably never actually wanted kids, but tried her hardest to love Ryder. Her family had connections with the art scene, she always attended the richest events in the finest gowns, and spent as much time in her closet as she did Ryder's play room. Since the divorce, she's cycled through boyfriends. Some good for her, some not so much, some closer in age to Ryder than her, it felt like.

Outside of his family life, I did want him to have some stability, so Ryder grew up with nannies and tutors who took good care of him, helped him grow into a somewhat stable grown up. Somewhat. I wanted him to be a world traveler, experiencing life on the road, so it made sense to me that he grow up with his dad, traveling, learning as he went, visiting city after city, state after state, country after country, continent after continent. He made friends, but not for very long. He slept with people for weeks at a time before never calling them again. His most steady, valuable relationships in his life were the ones forged with his caretakers, whether that was touching, or sad at the end of it all.

One of the biggest inspirations when it came to creating Ryder was his love story. With Ana (hi!) we crafted a relationship between him and her character, Madelyn, in which they met while he was attending college in Boston. Since they didn't live in the same city, their relationship was long-distance and online, at least until he moved to Merrock. I wanted to play this guy who, despite having the world at his feet, was ready to give it all up for love, come to this little podunk town he had only visited when he was younger to see his cousin, and really give it a go at settling down and seeing what could shake out of it. I liked the idea of this big city guy who wore Gucci sneakers and drove a Porsche moving into a small town like Merrock and just let it take him over. Even when Madelyn was no longer a part of the group, I liked watching the way that the town changed Ryder, whether it be in the form of his two best friends that he lived with, the jobs that he was working, despite the ridiculously large trust fund and bank account that just sits there; it's fun.

Some of the aesthetics used to create Ryder are pretty obvious: boys who like fast cars, boys who kiss boys and girls, boys who wear fancy clothes, boys who have money, boys who know they're hot, boys who drink too much on weekends, boys, boys, boys, because in a lot of ways, Ryder is more of a boy than a man, although I do think that he's on his way to figuring all of that out. Maybe before he turns thirty. I wanted him to have a bit of an ego, be cocky and full of himself, but have a lot of it be tongue-in-cheek, and have Merrock be a learning experience in that regard, too, maybe have him realize that it was okay to just be a decent human being, believe it or not. Bisexual, he likes anyone and everyone, sleeps around, doesn't really do serious relationships (anymore, anyway) and has left a trail of one night stands in his wake. I also wanted him to be ridiculously stubborn about not wanting to live in his parents' shadow, wanting to create a life for himself. Hence picking up the job at the gallery and The Garden and trying to live off of his own money. Given that at the time of his "conception" my other masculine characters were Cage, Rafael and Darrius -- Cage being a carpenter who worked with his hands, Rafael being an older gentleman with life figured out, and Darrius being a hulking figure with a soft heart, playing a messy, younger character who was also just unapologetically himself felt right.

I really do not have a lot in common with Ryder... except for art. And that's a very small amount. For example, I took art classes in high school. Ryder graduated college with a whole ass degree and has had several showings in Boston. I haven't, for what it's worth. That's about where our similarities end, though. I don't have money or sports cars or fancy clothes or any of it... but it's fun to play someone who does!

#merrocktask #all about ryder #;; i didn't forget these!!!

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something-about-sunflowers · 1 year

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hiii i don't really go here except in a super secondhand way and therefore i don't have an opinion on this as discourse, i just wanted to point out specifically that the framing of "it speaks volumes of ur opinion of ed that you think he could be hurt in this way + that he couldn't easily remove someone attempting to abuse him from his life" in ur post feels kind of like it's victim-blaming irl survivors of abuse, or at least has a negative view of them in situations where it isn't that simple. this probably comes down to wording, but i just wanted to mention it because it made me uncomfortable!

Alright, so I'm going to assume this is in good faith, because it really does my head in worrying that every dissenting ask I get relating to an opinion I have about or around Izzy Hands is someone intentionally reading what I'm saying in the worst faith imaginable. I do have to say though, Anon, this is very much a 'you say you like pancakes so that means you hate waffles' kind of interpretation of what I was saying.

Prefacing that, if I come across as aggressive, it's not my intent. I'm just trying to be frank and sometimes that can read as aggression over text.

So, first. What I said really says nothing to how I view real life survivors of abuse because I am not talking about real life survivors of abuse. I am talking about fictional characters. One, specifically, that I do not interpret as - currently - experiencing abuse.

Second, I'm speaking to Izzy's inability to enact abuse towards Ed, by way of the interpretation of him by the very same people who think he is abusing him. I don't believe he's capable of it for a number of reasons but some of the same people who spout the 'Izzy is Ed's abuser' *ahem* 'meta' also - incongruously - seem to view him as incredibly incompetent in everything he does, except where it can fuel their agenda. 'It speaks to how you view Ed' because the belief that Izzy is otherwise genuinely incompetent, yet somehow still able to hold this power over Ed, denigrates Ed's own competency.

Third, this isn't a 'situation where it's less simple' because it's not abuse. Abuse necessitates a power imbalance in the favor of the person - supposedly, in this case - doing the abusing, otherwise it's just an unhealthy/toxic relationship. I have the utmost sympathy for people in abusive relationships and in unhealthy/toxic relationships but they are not the same. Ed has the social and professional power over Izzy in their relationship. Ed is, textually, better at manipulating Izzy than Izzy is at manipulating Ed.

If you took away all of Izzy's negative interactions with Ed, Ed would be Izzy's abuser. If you took away all of Ed's negative interactions with Izzy, Izzy still wouldn't be Ed's abuser because he's not in a position of power over Ed. Keeping them both the way they are, they're mutually toxic towards one another.

Perhaps it is an issue with my wording, perhaps it's an issue with our individual interpretations of the characters, perhaps it's just that you don't know me and assumptions make asses out of us all. Or maybe I was wrong in assuming good faith and you're really just trying to levy social justice language at me a la 'abuse apologist' in an attempt to keep me silent, like the Izzy Canyon's favorite little bastard Anon. I'd like to think it's not that though.

That said, if what I say makes you uncomfortable, either my original post or my clarification here, by all means - for your own sake - go ahead and block me. I do not intend to cause discomfort with the things I say and/or the way I say them but I simply do not have the time or the energy to carefully word my posts so that they cater to every possible interpretation of them.

I am more than willing to offer explanations or clarifications where someone might ask but, frankly, I cannot, will not, and should not have to preempt every potential read - bad faith or not.

#the dork is being a dork #the dork answers #izzy hands #the izcourse #genuinely i DO want to assume this is in good faith but there are so many little things about this ask that give me the ick #which like. i know is kind of the same as assuming that my original post intended THAT interpretation #but at the very least 'sends bad faith asks' isn't as bad an accusation as #'victim blames real life abuse survivors because of how they view fictional characters'

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ghostie-my-beloved · 3 years

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Yandere Karlnapity Headcanons?

yandere karlnapity hcs

Synopsis: the polyamorous trio in the Dream SMP are all such sweethearts. Well, at least around their dear beloved that is.

Pairings: yandere!Quackity / yandere!Karl / yandere!Sapnap (separately) x GN!reader (they/them) [COMBINED BONUS WITH ALL CHARACTERS AT THE END]

A/N: hey first yandere request for the Dream SMP! Thanks for the request, it was very fun coming up with headcanons for these guys! Also I’d like to bring up that all Yandere content for the dsmp will be CHARACTER VERSIONS ONLY! NO CONTENT CREATOR YANDERES! (Art credits go to @/SweetcriesSweet on Twitter and @/Camriod on tumblr)

TW: THIS IS YANDERE CONTENT. It will include many dark themes such as g0re, stalking, kidnapping, murder, drugging, unhealthy obsessions and many more, please don’t read if you’re easily triggered by this stuff

THIS IS PURELY FICTION AND I DO NOT CONDONE THESE TYPES OF RELATIONSHIPS. IF YOU’RE IN A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP GET OUT OF IT IMMEDIATELY

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Karl would be those playful types of yanderes and you know it

When he first started falling for you, he didn’t think much of it, after all he WAS open to having new partners anyways

But soon he’d start fixating on you, and imagine scenarios of him hanging out with you and such

These daydream slowly got more and more concerning, as his imaginations started getting more… colorful you could say

And then he started projecting those fantasies onto his victims, which twisted our time traveling boy into the yandere he is

He’d never dare to hurt you, that would just be shameful! Not even manipulate you, he doesn’t find it necessary

However he’s surprisingly good at keeping up a facade and making sure you’re oblivious to everything he does

He acts so sweet and cute around you, but behind the curtains his whole demeanor changes

Out of the trio, he does the least amount of killing

He’d rather just emotionally manipulate his victims to the point they’re BEYOND repair

But with manipulation comes with skill, and Karl is ruthless with his words and actions

Gaslights his victims a lot, threatens them on many occasions

His sickly sweet voice alone is enough to scare someone shitless, it’s not even funny

When he does kill it’s usually just one or two times

He only does it when the person is REALLY ticking him off

But he doesn’t make them suffer or anything, he’s generous sometimes, after all torture is too much handy work for him

Back to the playful topic; he’d use his clinging as as a way of telling other people to back off from you both

With the exception of Sapnap and Quackity, he’d just cling to you and send death glares to anyone who even looks at you without you even noticing

Rarely stalks you, he’s around you enough because of how handsy and affectionate he gets

When he does though he makes sure that you can’t notice him, he doesn’t want his darling to see this side of him after all

And you can’t ever feel his menacing gaze, as his amethyst eyes pierce into your figure

Karl would be the slickest yandere in the trio, and the least violent in terms of physical field, but he’s the best when it comes to his words and manipulation, don’t mess with him if you’re only asking for emotional trauma

“Awww don’t cry sweetheart, I’ll be here to take care of you. As long as you do a favor for me, I’ll be sure to spare you! It’s only a fair trade for the two of us, right?” -yandere!Karl

Sapnap would be the scariest yandere

Up until the point where he even spooks Quackity and Karl, it’s kinda terrifying my guy

This Blaze hybrid is kind of possessive of his current partners, he probably didn’t like you that much at first

But he soon grew to love you, and soon adopted the traits that Karl was displaying when you weren’t around

Not gonna lie, Quackity most likely manipulated him into doing his yandere tendencies, poor guy

LOVES any form of attention from you, even if it isn’t direct

If he thinks you’re talking about him, he automatically wants in on it

Because he wants to show off lol

He most likely does the most killing in the group

But it’s all rather sloppy and messy, it’s the inner Blaze instincts in him

Methods of killing are usually via his weapons, or using his flames to give his victims a painful death

Will not hesitate to be intimidating, you’ve got scary guard dog privileges

He’s very bad at stalking, as he almost got spotted many times, so he mostly leaves it up to Karl

However, he does give you many special gifts and such

He’s also very uhhh— seductive and flirty around you, since he wants to claim you as his as soon as possible

And he definitely has dirty fantasies about you and him too, don’t think he doesn’t

Since Sapnap is now 1000x more protective of you, he tends to pretty much overthink about what could possibly happen to you when he’s gone

Which makes him— WAY MORE dangerous every-time you’re away from him

So let him cool off his stress by going absolutely ballistic on a few people or two <3

He stopped accepting visitors at his place too, because he’s too paranoid on what might happen to you

Dream and George were kind of concerned at this, but it’s not like they could do much anyways

And eventually, many people started to stay away from you and Sapnap, which made the panda boy satisfied

But he’s still pretty yandere around you obviously, that never changed

Oh you bet your ass that he watches you while you’re sleeping, and you’re completely unaware

And he even might kiss you and leave a mark or two on your body while you’re in a slumber, just to let everyone know who you belong to :)

“So pure and innocent, I want it all to myself. I don’t care who I vas to go through to claim you as mine forever, I’ll make sure you learn to love me, like how ill love you.” -yandere!Sapnap

He’s the tactician of the trio, the smart and cunning yandere

Quackity has very violent tendencies at times, but he mostly leaves the dirty work to Sapnap

He works with his other partners to plan out their next moves, and figure out everything about you

When you’re around Alex, he’s very sweet, charming and flirty

You find it so dorky and endearing, but honey we all know that’s just a facade so he hides his true demeanor

Hon you better pray that you don’t get on his bad side, because my oh my he’s a man constantly wary of his victims every moves

Not a single one of his prey gets away from him, and he ensures that my making sure his other lovers help him commit to his dirty work

He starts off with Karl luring the target into a weaker area both mentally and physically

Then he gets Sapnap to abuse the poor soul for the sake to watch them suffer, or just, for his own amusement, which most of the time ends in death

If it doesn’t however, he finally finishes them off in his— own special way that’s better off left in the dark :)

This whole relationship just basically became toxic as fuck, and it’s mostly because of Alex himself

Karl doesn’t have the willpower to hurt others, and Sapnap is just— violent, so Alex made it work

On his own, he’s still a force to be reckoned with

He also specializes in torture, so pray to god that you have the endurance to handle what he’s about to do to you

He keeps trinkets from his victims as a trophy for the trio

I’m not kidding, it’s horrifying to think about

Take an accessory from a victim’s body, or a piece of clothing, hell maybe even something precious to the victim and bam, a souvenir for memories

Quackity has a trophy for every victim all three of them have murdered

Combined all their kills together, and the number is scarier than how most people would interpret it

Quackity also steals a lot of your stuff for the sake of “preserving” it as well

Hairbrush, shoes, clothes etc. He’ll take anything from you as long as it reminds him of you

This sick side of Alex is very terrifying, but he’s very good at masquerading it

Does he know what he’s doing is over the top insane? That Sam could send him to jail for this? Absolutely, of course he does

But he couldn’t care any less, this is all for the sake of his beloved darling

He’s doing this for him and his current lovers, he’s gonna keep you safe no matter what :)

“You think I ever cared about what could’ve happened to me? Think again, darling. They’ll be mine for good, and once I get my hands on them permanently, it’s over for you all.” -yandere!Quackity

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[ADDED QUOTE ONE-SHOT BONUS. I’ll leave it up to the readers to decide what happened after ;)]

“No guys— please I need an explanation, something isn’t right…”

“Y/N my love, what do you mean by that? Are you sure you’re fine?”

“I know damn well I’m not going crazy or something— you’re behind their deaths aren’t you?”

“Your words pain me, how could we do such a thing—“

“PLEASE JUST LISTEN TO ME! You’re all— acting so- so strange, it’s not normal. And I’m just getting this awful feeling from you three it’s- it’s driving me nuts. What’s— whats going on with you three…?”

“My love, you know us better than that. We would never do that to your loved ones, we wouldn’t dare to do that.”

“Yeah… why would you think of us that way? We would hate to do that to you… you know that, right?”

“But—“

[you felt the strong and firm grip of Sapnap from behind you, not budging a bit or letting go]

“Trust us, Y/N. We’re doing our best to protect you. We love you too much to hurt you.”

“….”

“Good, you’re calm now… that’s what we want from you, you’re doing great so far, we’ll keep helping you.”

[you’re telling yourself to run, but you can’t, you simply just can’t]

“Ohhhh mi amor… we’ll make sure you’re safe in our hands forever :]”

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bogleech · 3 years

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My favorite “abstract” monster movies/horror movies that feel like really good SCP’s and a non-spoiler note about each! Let me know any more along these lines! Some were your suggestions the last time I talked “anomaly horror movies” so thanks!!

Pontypool is based on a wildly different novel and a lot of people liked it more, but I actually found the movie more fun with its subtler and more focused story (basically just a small piece of the book) It is adjacent to, but is not a “zombie movie.”

Rubber is more comedy than anything else and has a strange meta angle some find pretentious. I just like that it’s about a murderous tire.

Absentia is a pretty harrowing film that involves missing children and pregnancy in its horror but also a very unique paranormal element for modern cinema.

Await Further Instructions is one I just saw weeks ago on Netflix and some people hate the tonal shift of the climax, the “silly” ending and the admittedly questionable “technology bad” kind of angle (edit: I was right the first time and that isn’t its message) but this is really one of my favorite monsters in a movie ever, and the whole thing is written just fun as hell to me.

Oculus is not about a “haunted” or “demonically possessed” mirror like some reviewers seem to think.

Autopsy of Jane Doe is technically about a classic kind of supernatural being but it’s presented in such a creative way.

In The Tall Grass is an adaptation of a King short story and “confusing” according to a lot of reviews. I did not find it confusing. I don’t think you will either? I think they just didn’t understand a movie where the antagonist is a phenomenon or location.

Possum is the least explicitly supernatural one here; the “creature” is symbolic and the real subject matter might be extremely disturbing for people who just want a spooky film.

1408 is another Stephen King adaptation and like Oculus I’ve seen reviewers who think it’s about a “haunting.” It isn’t, and the movie even says so.

Deep Dark is the closest thing in this list to just a literal “creature movie” but it’s a highly original entity who’s also just a delightful villainous character!

And FULL SPOILER synopsis for each if you want that!

Pontypool is about the English language itself becoming an infection, your vocabulary breaking down as you’re driven to a berserk state. Taking some dialog as canon and the book at face value, language itself has always been a metaphysical “organism” and now English in particular is trying to escape the confines of what it is. For this reason, infectees behave like zombies because they want to “chew through the mouth” of other people who are speaking.

Rubber has a tire just wake up one day for no reason and make things explode by shaking at them. A group of people lead by the film’s director follow the tire around and comment on events as if they’re over-analyzing an art piece.

Absentia never fully shows more than a hand and overall outline of its monsters, which are described as resembling silverfish but actually seem to be some kind of sadistic, ancient fae connected with an underpass.

Await Further Instructions is about a toxic family suddenly trapped in their home by a metal barrier and ordered around by emergency messages on their TV. Towards the end it turns out that television itself has gained awareness and wants humans to acknowledge it as master.

Oculus is about a mirror that can warp your perception of reality and has a staggeringly sick, sadistic will. A woman whose parents were killed by the mirror has devoted her life to studying it and setting up an elaborate, scientifically controlled system to finally document and destroy it.

Autopsy of Jane Doe is about an unidentified dead woman who does not seem to decay, and fights back against being examined and embalmed through manipulation of reality. She is revealed to have been executed centuries ago as a witch, but it’s implied there was nothing supernatural about her until her wrongful torture left a hatred that transcends death.

In The Tall Grass features a field that bends time and space in order to keep people trapped. The hub of the phenomenon is a massive “stone” (a brief, bizarre shot implies that it is something very different) that can invade the minds of victims and enslave them to the field’s survival.

Possum is about a man with a very, very creepy marionette puppet, and we see it move a few times, but it’s hard to say what’s real within the narrative of this movie, except that the man was a victim of childhood abuse and neither he nor the puppet are its antagonists.

1408 is in a similar vein to Oculus and Jane Doe; it’s a hotel room that can do whatever it wants with reality or its victim’s perception of reality, and it seems to have a limitless love of inflicting agony. I also like the short story just as much, and it has some moments I wish had translated to the film.

Deep Dark is about a cheap, filthy apartment where a long line of world-famous artists and inventors are revealed to have secretly found inspiration. When an unknown artist tries it for himself, he ends up in an unhealthy intimate relationship with something that inhabits the walls, speaks in a woman’s voice and provides him slimy pheromone-laced spores that intoxicate and charm other humans.

#movies #horror #monsters #halloween #creepypasta #SCP foundation #just those vibes is all

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dracowars · 2 years

Note

hi! can I request a draco angsty fic based off the song “if I killed someone for you” by alec benjamin? maybe something that deals with unrequited love? thank you 🥰🥰

if i killed someone for you | draco malfoy

pairing: draco x reader

word count: 774

summary: where draco kills someone for y/n

a/n: i didn’t know the song beforehand, but i absolutely love it now! thank you so much for this request <3

warnings: angst, mentions of blood, mentions of death, minor character death, unrequited love, unhealthy obsession, toxic relationship

universe: harry potter

Breathing heavily with tears running down his cheeks and then falling to the already wet floor, he stands there, completely alone, lonely. Shocked, almost frightened, he lifts his head a bit to look at his own face in the shattered mirror. But he does not see his face, he does not recognize himself. The boy he now sees in his reflection, staring at him so sadly and reproachfully, is completely alien to him.

A loud, painful scream leaves Draco’s mouth while he grips the sink even tighter than he already did, digging the splinters of the mirror even further and deeper into his palm so that not only tears but also blood covers the floor now. He does not feel the pain anymore anyway. His body is completely resistant to any kind of pain except that one pain coming straight from within his heart.

What would his parents say if they could see him like this? But more importantly, what would you say?

He vowed to be better, to be a better man. Now he cowers next to a lifeless body, not quite realizing yet what he has done. One moment he suddenly stood in front of him, and he pulled out his wand, the green eerie light lit up in front of his eyes and suddenly everything was over. As if nothing had ever happened, as if he had never even been there.

Worst of all, however, is that Draco does not care. He feels completely numb, nothing gets through to him. Neither did he call for help nor did he try to help himself. He just stood there. It would have been too late anyway. That is why he does not even take another look at the dead body but walks straight past it after trying to wash the bloody stains from his white shirt in vain for several minutes. Quickly, he runs through the dark corridors, his gaze scurrying back and forth in fear that he might meet someone at any moment. Someone who is not you.

But he knows that everything will turn out alright, because he did it for you. A kind of ecstasy runs through his entire body as he ponders how you are going to react. After all, he did all of this just for you. He has always done everything for you and now you will finally recognize him for it. It will have been worth joining the Death Eaters because of you, and it will be worth killing someone for you too. You will love him more than ever and take his hands in yours lovingly, even though he recently killed someone with them. For you.

The smallest noise that he perceives already makes him stop in his tracks. Only when he is sure that he was just imagining it does he continue on his way. Draco follows the path that will lead him to you.

It does not take long and without really realizing it, he finally stands at your door. He cannot quite remember how he got here so quickly, but that is the last thing he cares about now. All he desperately wants is to see you.

The dull knock on the door only reaches him through thick clouds, as does the creak of the door after you slowly open it. However, the expression on your face is very different from what Draco had hoped for.

“Draco? Is that you?”, he hears your voice from afar, even though you are only a few meters in front of him. He watches how you look him up and down, scanning him and discovering the splatters of blood, noticing his terrible appearance.

You do not recognize him. Just as little as he recognized himself in his reflection.

“I-It is me”, he says quietly, but not even his own voice sounds familiar anymore. “C-Can I.. Can I come in?”

“Draco, what have you done!?”

The reproach reaches him all of a sudden, piercing his entire body like a painful arrow and suddenly destroying everything in him. He does not get to answering you – he is not even sure his voice has not already left him after you have apparently noticed what happened, what he did.

But he did it for you. Only for you.

You wanted it this way. You wanted him to do it. That is why he did it. He changed and has finally become what you wanted him to be.

And as you walk past him in that moment, quickly running away from him, it suddenly occurs to Draco that the person he actually killed is himself.

He killed himself for you.

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dreamkidddream · 3 years

Note

Hi I love love LOVE your blog would you maybe do all the obey me brothers x reader yandere wise?

Hi anon! Thank you for the love I really appreciate it!! I know I sound like a broken record, but I was so nervous to start this blog and I’m so happy that people are enjoying my writings. So this request was kinda vague (and it’s my first yandere request!), so I’m assuming you mean general headcannons being in a relationship with the brothers (separately) being yandere. If I’m wrong, just send in the request again with some more details and I’ll be happy to redo it. Reader is gender neutral and I hope you enjoy!

Sidenote: Beel’s and Belphie’s part is a little bit short. Sorry!

TW: Unhealthy relationships, toxic behavior, yandere behavior but not too graphic is mentioned

Spoilers for Lesson 9-11 (mentioned in Satan’s) and Lesson 16 (mentioned in Mammon’s, Beel’s and Belphie’s)

Yandere HC’s with The Bros

So let me begin by saying this: I think that all demons are very territorial and even more so possessive. The brothers no doubt all love you, but you couldn’t help but realize that their way of love was starting to get just a tad bit worrying. I mean, you knew that they were demons and that they wouldn’t dream of hurting you (again), but it was starting to feel...intense. After all, they were just starting to express openly how they feel. You tried to give them the benefit of the doubt, but it was scary. They were determined that you were going to know just how much they love you...

And you were going to accept it, whether you wanted to or not.

Lucifer

Very controlling

You thought he was strict before, please, you haven’t seen anything yet

It went from telling you when to eat to downright constantly being in his presence. You were pretty much living in his room at this point, with the exception of leaving for school where he was your only escort

He was the embodiment of Pride, he took in pride in everything that he does, which included you. He was the reflection of perfection, and he were going to make sure that you and your relationship with him would reflect that too

He couldn’t help it. He was the oldest and the brother in charge, and that control transferred into your relationship. There was no room for backtalk or disobedience with him, it was his word, and his word was final

But, it was coming from a good place (in his eyes). He only wanted the best for you, because you deserved the best. And you’re a human, one of the weakest beings to ever exist that demons wouldn’t hesitate to rip limb from limb for fun. And he already lost you once due to his negligence. If he was there, if he knew what you were up to, if he knew your every move, then it wouldn’t have taken place. If he takes control, you would be safe. Sure, you would complain about wanting your “freedom” back (relax MC, he didn’t lock you up yet), but this was the best course of action.

Being the Avatar of Pride and the oldest (and most powerful) of all the brothers, Lucifer was intimidating. He knew the power and the weight that his name holds in the Devildom, he wasn’t Diavolo’s right hand man for nothing. So with that being said, he didn’t have to worry about any lesser demon even thinking about trying to take you away.

He didn’t see anyone as competition. Psh, do you see who he is? If anything, he sees these “competitors” as nuisances. Annoyances that didn’t know how to go away when they noticed that they weren’t welcomed. They weren’t going to take you away, they won’t even get the chance to be physically close to you, but...

He didn’t have a problem in making an example out of one or two people, as a matter of fact he relished it in. Have them on display for the whole Devildom to see. After looking at their disfigured and nearly destroyed bodies, the message is made clear: to make sure that it’s known that you are off limits completely

He loves you MC, and you may not understand that when he hovers over you, demanding that you never leave his sight, when he makes it to where none of your friends talk to you anymore (when they see you both walking, they immediately turn the other way like they haven’t seen you at all), and even when your time with the other brothers is limited to the point where you see him and only him, but he truly does love you

Lucifer loves you. He let his walls down and even swallowed his pride when he admitted this to you, and he doesn’t want to regret it. Which is why he had to be the dominant force in this relationship. He wasn’t going to lose you again, he refused to. No one was going to take you away from him, lest they incur the wrath of the firstborn

Mammon

This demon was already clingy, so just amp it up to an 1000

Mammon already gets picked on by demons, witches, and even his own family. So when you started to defend and comfort him, he was smitten. You, a mere human, making the Great Mammon feel butterflies in his stomach? Had you told Mammon this 100s of years ago that he would fall in love with a human, he would have laughed in your face and blew you off. But here he was, head over heels in love with you

He was already following you, since he was deemed your protector, and he took that title very seriously.

“Oi MC, stay close with me, that creep’s walking too close.” “Human, ‘ya need to let me walk with you every class, what if some no-good demon’s plannin’ something and I’m not there?!” “MC, stay away from that scumbag, I don’t like him being near you...”

Your safety wasn’t a game, it wasn’t a risk he would be taking like he’s playing a game of poker. No. He loves you, and he hasn’t felt this kind of warmth since his days in the Celestial Realm. If it means that he would never leave your side (and trust me, he’s not complaining), then he was happy about it. Ecstatic even. You were a pure soul and you made him smile everyday, he wasn’t willing to lose you by a longshot

He escalated from being a puppy to a growling rabid demon, baring his fangs at anyone he deemed a threat (which was starting to be an alarming rate of people, even people that you both personally knew). Mammon would always have some sort of grip on you, ready to pull you away under the guise that he was defending you. It got to a point where it just seemed like he was always on edge, just picking fights for no reason, and it got to the point where you confronted him about it. These people were your friends! They weren’t random demons trying to eat you alive, they weren’t trying to torture you for entertainment, and you are your own person! You’re not just some possession, and you’re not a child! You can take care of yourself-

He didn’t like that at all

You didn’t understand it, you’re a weakling compared to everyone here, and you wouldn’t make it by yourself (was Belphie not enough proof of that statement?!). You needed Mammon, and he was going to be there protecting you, whether you wanted it or not. He failed once, and got a second chance, and he wasn’t going to waste it. And if you didn’t want his protection, that’s okay. You’ll grow to live and love him soon enough

Many people forget that while Mammon does act childish and does rather stupid things at times, he is the second born. The second most powerful brother right after Lucifer himself. He won’t (or at least tries not to) do these acts in front of you, no. He knows how vulnerable you can be, you’re not used to seeing vicious acts like these in front of you, but he is. Your classmate that wanted to do a study date for a big test? He’s trying to curse you so he can hurt you Canceled last minute and unenrolled from the class next day. Beel’s teammate that asked you for your number? He obviously wants to get some inside info to harm you Bones broken beyond repair to the point where he couldn’t play Fangol anymore and left in despair (you were only trying to plan a surprise for Beel since he’s been working so hard). The demon that accidentally bumped into you on the street? He tried to attack you and Mammon stepped in before it got worse You personally saw what he was capable of before you begged him to stop.

All in all, he’s the Avatar of Greed, it’s in his nature to be selfish. Before, he hated himself for how low his sin would make him feel, but damn did it feel good to indulge in it with it came to you

Leviathan

Out of all the bros to go yandere, he would be one of the worst to encounter. Good luck MC, cause you’re gonna need it dealing with his yandere side

Being that his sin is jealousy, it’s just a disaster waiting to happen. Why were you ALWAYS talking to his brothers and not him?! It’s not fair, it’s not fair!-

On top of that, he can be very manipulative, and he knows it. Whenever he talks down on himself, saying that he can understand why you would want to talk to other people instead of him. After all, he’s just a icky otaku who’s a worthless excuse for the third strongest brother-

Whenever he has this spouts, he knows that you’ll drop everything and come reassure him. You can always reschedule, he needs you now

With Levi, he knows what he’s doing is wrong, but he can’t help it, and he doesn’t care to. It took him so long to find real affection, and even then he still had his suspicions. You don’t really care for him if you keep trying to leave him, you don’t! Clearly, your love was just an act. If you really did love him, then wouldn’t you spend all of your time with him and no one else?

He knew that you couldn’t physically be with him forever, you weren’t immortal after all. But that didn’t mean that you couldn’t spend your remaining time with him. You could switch to online classes like him, constant anime and TSL marathons, and you could even watch him stream live! That sounded like heaven (ironically) to him and it would make him beyond happy, so why aren’t you agreeing with him? You would do this if Mammon asked or even if your hex classmate begged you too, so why not do it for him?? Was he not enough for you?! He knew that someone would try to steal you, and there will be hell to pay

Another thing, Levi was smart. Granted, not as book smart as Satan, but he was smart and sly. Always being stuck in his room, it gave him the chance to be stealthy since no one ever expects him to leave (unless it was for a rare appearance at RAD for student council meetings or something he was actually excited for and wouldn’t shut up about it). This gives him time for what needs to be done: collecting some “personal souvenirs” for himself and getting rid of some scum

Levi is like Mammon, many people forget that not only is he the third strongest, but he is the Grand Admiral of Hell’s Navy. They just don’t see him in this position of power because of his image as the shut-in otaku who fanboys over Ruri-Chan. But when he breaks out of that mentality, people should worry...

He doesn’t like to be super messy, his route is silent but quick. Doesn’t mean that it would be painless though, just quick and without much of a mess. Being an reptile/aquatic demon does have its perks, especially when it comes to using his venom

Levi, while he struggles with openly expressing his feelings, won’t have that much of an issue showing you how he feels. He may not be able to say it with words confidently, but he can definitely show you how he truly feels by never letting you go

Satan

Another one to where if he went yandere, he would be the worst to deal with

Satan, while he had a better handle on his emotions, still struggled from time to time. He is the Avatar of Wrath, and yes, you all didn’t feel like you had to walk on eggshells when conversing with him, it didn’t mean that you could just say or do anything

He still reacted in his angry ways, but it wasn’t nearly as ruthless as how it was before. For example, if you spilled something on him by accident, he’ll be just a little irritated, but after looking at your guilty expression, it would slowly drift away. He knows that you aren’t idiotic like some of his brothers , and it was you, he couldn’t stay mad at you no matter how much he tried. It would eat at him, anger turning into sadness, then clarity and understanding. And you were to thank for that

After the whole body swap fiasco, he gotten better with understanding emotions other than the usual fury that flowed through his body. And the ones that you would make him feel got him addicted, to say the least

Like Levi, he starts to understand that what he is doing can’t be right, but he doesn’t understand why. Satan, one of (if not) the smartest of the brothers, could not figure out what you were making him feel, until it finally hit him when you said the three words he desperately didn’t know that he needed to hear:

“Thank you so much, Satan! Seriously, I love you.”

This feeling became much clearer now. This...was how true love felt? Like the ones that he read so much about? This was like a dream come true then. He, a demon that born from literal wrath, was receiving genuine love. Someone loved him, and he refused to let that go.

He would occupy your time and space more, always offering to help you study for some tests or completing assignments, and even inviting you to come read with him. This was fine, it wasn’t an issue.

What was the issue was how territorial he was getting of you. Whenever someone else wanted to hang out or just be in your presence, Satan would lose his cool. It would start out slowly building with him making snarky comments out loud, saying that they were boring you and wasting your time when you could be with him. Then it would lead to him lingering around, sticking close to your side by either grasping your hand or, if he was feeling extra possessive, an arm wrapped tightly around your waist with him giving a threatening look at the offender. If none of these things were working however (Diavolo forbid if the person was ignoring him or even acting smug), he was ready to explode.

He didn’t want to scare you anymore than he already had. Satan knew that in the past that he used his reputation as the Avatar of Wrath to strike fear into people, including you when you first arrived here. But he was a new demon! He couldn’t make his anger or wrath go away, but he could control it and find new ways to release it instead of the usual rampages. And he wanted to prove to you that he wasn’t just the rage-filled demon, but a man that was more than capable of loving you

But he couldn’t, he wouldn’t, let this person get off scot-free. You noticed how tense he was getting, and before you could even blink he already had them dangling by their neck. You could make out some of the things he was saying, “How dare you think you can take MC away from me?! I won’t hesitate to end your pathetic existence if you so much as glance at them-”. He could feel you tugging at him, pleading at him to please calm down and that you could both just leave-

Well, why didn’t you say so earlier MC? All of this could have been avoided if you were just with him this entire time instead of this filth. As long as you kept giving him this euphoric feeling and have him feeling like he’s on Cloud 9, then everything will be fine. A non-rampaging Satan is a happy Satan, and a happy Satan is good for you and everyone around. Just stay in his presence, just give him love, and everything will be peaceful.

Satan is not a merciful demon, and when he acts on his wrath it gets very gruesome. If you want people to keep their body parts attached and not scattered across the Devildom (and not find their bloody heart at your door since they wanted you to have it so much), then don’t stray away from him. When Satan is with you, he feels content with everything, and he doesn’t want that to change. He wants you to be happy with him like he is with you, and he won’t let anyone get in the way of that

You were the beauty to his beast, and he was going to get his happy ever after, even if he had to tear through and rip apart every single person in the way, one by one

Asmodeus

Getting the Avatar of Lust to fall in love with you is a feat that was rarely (if not ever) obtained. It was both a blessing and a curse

A blessing to where you got the treasured fifth born to show you just how much he appreciates you for you, and only wanted your eyes set on him. A curse to where he only wanted your attention, and was furious if your eyes wandered off him for a millisecond.

You knew how Asmo was, he lived for the attention, the spotlight on him and only him, with people announcing their undying love and affection just for him. But there was a glaring problem with this

Asmo wanted you announcing your undying love and affection just for him. He loved his fans, but he didn’t love them like he loved you, and that was a problem for him. You made him fall in love with you, so it’s only fair that you deal with it, right? It’s only fair to love him as much as he did you right? Really, you were the one that was suppose to be madly in love with him, not the other way around

It doesn’t matter what you answered, loving him was the only choice that you had. Your head should be filled with thoughts of Asmo, your attention only set on him, your pretty lips only speaking praises and “I love you” just for him, you should dedicated to Asmo and only Asmo

What did you do to make him fall so hard for you? He’s no stranger to having flings and the feeling of love in general. In the past, he’s convinced himself that he was in love with certain people, but it would never last, the “love” that he felt fleeting. So for you to make him feel this emotion, to feel this true love for so long and it not leave him yet frightened him so much. He wanted you to need him, to feel like he’s your very reason to breath, to live.

And he hated it when other people took your attention away

Asmo definitely wasn’t the one to be messy (he still has to look his best and some pieces of trash was not about to change that), so he lets his charm do the job, literally. Who could deny his request when he tells them that they should just leave MC alone forever, and that maybe they should go pay Cerberus a visit if they’re so desperate for some attention.

All in all, Asmo is borderline delusional that loving him is by giving him your attention, always and forever. He loves you, and the bare minimum that you’ve been giving him (in his eyes) isn’t enough anymore. He deserves your love and affection at all times, even if it means that he would be the only person in your life, then that was even better. Your love was only fitted for perfection, and he was perfection, no one else

Beelzebub

Okay, so Beel is already the nicest brother out of the bunch, so I think he would be the least concerning yandere to worry about

He’s already soft when it comes to you and his family, and he’s protective of you

He’s very, very protective of you

Beel, although he’s among the youngest, is one of the strongest physically. He’s muscular and the tallest out of the family. He doesn’t even need to open his mouth to threaten anyone, he can just stand there and stare menacingly in the background, and whoever was there would run for the hills

He’s always around you, which isn’t a bad thing. All he does is eat (which he offered to share and even feed to you), make small talk, and walk with you to wherever you needed to go. Besides, to you Beel is a big cuddly teddy bear (just with really sharp teeth). He wouldn’t hurt anyone without reason. As long as no one was trying to take you away or hurt you, then everything was fine.

He is willing to share you, but only with Belphie. He’s used to sharing with his twin, and he loved the both of you too much to be completely selfish with you. Plus, he knew that Belphie loved you too. This was the perfect reality for him: having you, his twin, and food. It makes him and Belphie happy, and they’ll make you happy along with keeping you safe

Now, if someone did have the courage to try anything with you, Beel would have no problems eliminating the issue. He’s a nice guy, but he won’t tolerate anything if it deals with his family. He’ll be conscious enough to where he won’t handle it in front of you, if anything he won’t even leave a trace. He’s the Avatar of Gluttony after all, he always has an appetite.

Beel is a very understanding, but also very wary, guy. After the Fall and losing his baby sister Lilith and having Belphie taken too, he’s terrified that something can and is bound to happen to you again. He will be ready this time, he won’t take anything else as an answer. You’ll still have your freedom, and you can still hang around some of your friends (at least for now), but just know that Beel will always be around. He’ll be like your second shadow, and always on the go. He loves you, and he refuses to lose anyone else that he loves.

Belphegor

This man was already yandere, let’s be real

After the whole situation happened and he was given a second chance to build a real relationship with you, he wasn’t going to screw it up. Believe it or not, despite his laziness, he was going to try his hardest to create a genuine bond with you. Actions speak louder than words after all, and he wanted to show you how much he’s changed. He was indebted to you, you gave him the chance to be with Beel again, and to get out of that cursed attic (even though he did kill you afterwards and was playing you like a fool)

Very possessive and very selfish. If he had to share, it would only be with his twin obviously. No one else was going to have you, and he would make sure that was a fact. After all, all he needed was you and Beel, no one else

Also like Levi, very manipulative. He doesn’t want to be that way, but if it keeps you by his side and no one else’s then oh well, he’ll get over it. If it has to be done, it has to be done

You don’t need to go to that party with Asmo, it’s time for your nightly cuddle sessions. Don’t go with that idiot Mammon, he wants his cuddles now. Why are you going with Diavolo and Lucifer? Are you forgetting what they did to him, what his dear older brother did to him to save face? See what you did, you made him sad, maybe if you take a nap with him and forget about everyone else he’ll start to feel a little bit better...

He’s lazy, but don’t take his laziness for weakness. If someone is really starting to become a bother, he’ll happily eradicate the threat. He’ll leave the body behind too, he wouldn’t feel like cleaning up. Plus, he would be proud of his work. Many people think that just because his sin is Sloth is that he’s a puny demon, but they also forget that he’s one of the most powerful demons to even grace Hell. And like Satan, he’s not very merciful. He won’t be as savage and bloodthirsty like him, but he’ll make sure that the problem goes in an agonizing way.

MC, just know that Belphie loves you for you, and not because of the Lilith revelation. His words may not come across like he does, but what he doesn’t say with his words, he makes up for in action. I mean, you don’t have to worry about other demons being a pain because he’ll make sure that they’ll go away, and plus you can just stay in their room! Studies show that sleeping next to someone you love is super healthy and helps you sleep better in general, and who else is better for the job than him?

He’s going to prove to you that he really loves you, he’s not going to make any more mistakes, and he’s not going to have any more regrets when it comes to you, he’s going to make sure of that. No one is going to get in the way of the ideal dream: just you, him, and Beel. Not random demons, not the other exchange students, not even Diavolo. No one was getting in the way, no one.

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raven-at-the-writing-desk · 3 years

Note

Hi,love your work and thoughts behind them.I was wondering if you would answer a few questions.You can skip any if your uncomfortable.

1: Favorite cliche or scenario to write for.

2:What got you into Twst.

3:Any other fandoms your involved with.

4:Who do you hope to voice any character in the upcoming Twst anime.

5:Is there any topic you want to write for ,but don't have the you can pull it off well

6: Thoughts on Grim.

7:Any things you want more of.

8:Are you into the Obey Me fandom

9:If so are you excited about season 4.

10: favorite flower.

That is all have a good day.

I don't know, 10 questions seems like more than "a few" to me--

My responses get a little lengthy, so I'll slap them under a cut!

1. I don't have anything specific in mind, but what I enjoy writing the most are character-focused pieces where the conflict is one's inner turmoil or coming to terms with one's own emotions instead of something physical. (To clarify, I do NOT mean pining or anything romantic here, I mean just a character growing and changing over time from impactful life experiences like Overblotting or losing a friend.) I feel like self reflection is very important, and something that's not often explored because it's abstract and doesn't have a clear answer or a definitive ending. Personally, I really like the open-endedness of these kinds of pieces, as they help me really analyze and understand the characters on a deeper level.

2. I wouldn't consider myself a Disney fan, but I do really enjoy Toboso-sensei's art style and storytelling! I had heard rumors online that she was working on a new project with Disney (which turned out to be Twisted Wonderland), and I've been following it since.

3. I play some other gacha games (since it helps curb the temptation to impulse pull in TWST), and I enjoy various shows/anime and manga/books, but I'm not actually that involved in other fandoms. I'm generally a casual fan that just sits and quietly enjoys content from the sidelines.

4. I mean, I thought the current VAs would just be reprising their roles for the anime? I don't really care to remember or to follow VAs (or celebrities in general), so I don't have anything to add.

5. I think that with enough time and research, I could write anything if I was interested enough in the concept. However, there are certain topics that I would like to avoid writing at all costs (not because I think I can't write them well, but because they are personally triggering). You can find a list of them in my writing request rules.

6. Honestly, I don't know why people find him to be so annoying (well, maybe except for his voice). The only reasonable explanation I can think of is maybe players are annoyed that Grim "steals the spotlight" from MC/Yuu, but I don't mind that because I think it's pretty funny. I really enjoy Grim's snark. He's not as mean-spirited as Ace, but he knows what he wants and how he's going to get it, even if it sometimes backfires on him. Grim is basically my first companion in Twisted Wonderland; he's been with me through it all, the good and the bad. He's really the one I truly consider to be my friend, not Malleus. In fact, I'm way more attached to Grim than I am to Malleus 😂 Grim being a cute, fluffy cat also helps his case, since I really like cats!

7. I'm always hungry for more TWST world and family lore! I'd really like a "parent-teacher conference" event where we get to meet each of the boys' parents and siblings! It would be super interesting to see what the students' dynamics with the family members are like, and how their families would react to hearing about how they're performing in school. It would really help to highlight the differences in each boy's upbringing and background, from healthy relationships to unhealthy and even toxic ones. Also, it'd be hilarious to see Lilia pull up as Silver's guardian--

8. I tried out Obey Me when it first came out, and it... well, it wasn't for me. That's not to say the game is bad, but it just wasn't to my tastes. I was expecting Obey Me to be something that it wasn't, so of course I was disappointed when it didn't meet those expectations. More power to you if you enjoy it, though! I can definitely see why it appeals to a certain demographic or why it's good as just some nonsensical fun. Here are my general thoughts on Obey Me:

The characterization and the jokes seemed repetitive. There's only so many times they can joke about Mammon being "the dumb one" or Beel eating so much before it loses its magic. There's also the problem of each boy being defined almost entirely by their "sin" or really basic character tropes (like Asmodeus's narcissism) rather than having any character outside of that.

In my opinion Barbatos, Simeon, Luke, Solomon, Diavolo, etc. are much better characters than the 7 brothers, because they don't have a single sin to rely on to be their entire personality. I stopped playing before those guys became "playable", so I'm a little sad that I never got to grab them.

I feel extremely weird about the plot twist about who the MC really is, and how all the brothers continue to aggressively hit on the MC despite knowing their true identity. Besides that, I felt like the main story and the events never took themselves seriously. I would have preferred it more if there was something more at stake instead of being 98% fluff.

If you hadn't told me the characters were demons, I'd have thought they were just generic pretty boy designs. Like... nothing about Asmodeus's looks screams "lust" to me, nothing about Satan's looks screams "wrath", etc. Meanwhile, you can take one look at Idia's gloomy face and stooped pose and immediately guess what type of personality he has. I felt like there was so much potential with the characters being angels and demons, but it was never capitalized on and therefore went to waste.

I never understood why everyone thought Lucifer was so hot? Maybe I just have shit taste--

Gameplay-wise, the events and new cards were too frequent. It was a very "pay to win" model, which required constant attention without allowing you enough time to properly save or to plan for new card drops if you didn't spend a cent on the game.

I'm not a fan of the general art style, but those little shadow demon dudes are super cute!

It's hilarious that the anime adaptation depicts the MC as a sheep ashdasidasibdagofuyabsdais;basd--

9. I don't know what "season 4" means, sorry!

10. Lilacs, gardenias, jasmine, and peonies are my favorites smell-wise, but I like all flowers. They're very pretty and calming to look at.

#question #notes from the writing raven #Obey Me #Grim #MC #Yuu #Lilia Vanrouge #Silver #Malleus Draconia

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where-theres-smoak-2 · 3 years

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Hiya 👋 I find it fascinating when people point out stuff about main characters that are brushed over and was I was wondering what’s your top reasons you dislike Alina and what scenes made you dislike her / made no sense.

Well I don't dislike Alina in the show but in the books I do think she is badly written. But here are some things that made the book character less appealing to me than the show.

I think the main one is her complete lack of agency. She very rarely makes any decisions for herself and just seems to go along with what everyone else (mostly male characters) say. There is a problem and instead of Alina being the one to make a decision or think of a solution she is told this is what we are going to do by either, M*l, Nikolai or the apparat. She is pushed around the plot by others actions instead of taking control herself and so often appears more as a puppet than as a commander or influential person in herself. For example in the show Alina is the one who tells M*l that they should seek the stag and kill it for it's amplification powers before the darkling does. Yet in the books this decision isn't hers but M*l's and Alina just goes along with it. There are also several instances where she clearly doesn't agree with the course of action or doesn't want to do something and yet she does it anyway, an example of this is when Nikolai and M*l want to attack the Volcra nest in the fold. She clearly has qualms about it but ends up folding to their will, another example is M*l insisting that once the fold and the darkling are destroyed that they seek a way to remove the amplifier, again this is something Alina doesn't want to do but she agrees with M*l and doesn't tell him her true desire. So what we end up with is a female protagonist who very much seems to be a pawn to the male characters in the book.

Another thing I disliked about the character's storyline is that she was often the victim of men, held captive and used to their advantage and this included one the supposed heroes. The darkling takes her captive twice wanting to use the amplifiers and control her to meet his own goals, Nikolai also at one point takes her captive and only really gives her freedom back to her because she agrees to help him, and the apparat takes her captive so that he can use her to gain religious power over the masses. She also never gets herself out of these situations, she just accepts her situation and waits to be rescued, for others to save her so that they too can use her for their own gain. I find this theme of her either being a victim of men or the pawn of one really worrying.

Another issue with the way she is written which again ties into the two above is that she is made far too dependant on M*l. Not only does she make herself very ill by suppressing her powers to stay with M*l but when her powers are revealed her refusal to let go of her attachment to M*l means that she struggles to master her powers, she becomes physically unable to summon because her refusal to let M*l go. Later in book two and three she spends a lot of time pining after him and getting in arguments about their positions of power. M*l feels useless and resents Alina's new position and power, he wants things to go back to how they were. He really does hold her back in many ways and this really should have been a love that they both grew out of but instead despite it being made obvious that they don't really fit together they both refuse to let the other go which means one or the other has to make sacrifices in order for them to be together. Not only that but Alina often puts M*l's needs, wants and safety above the greater good, rather than save the grisha or other vulnerable people she will safe M*l even going so far as to let 30-40 innocent people die in the fold so that she can save his life. This co-dependant relationship that she has with M*l is very unhealthy and toxic which would be ok if this was recognised within the narrative and then steps were taken to fix it, but instead this relationship is presented as some grand love story despite how damaging it truly is to Alina. In the Tv adaption they show us that Alina can be very happy and actually thrive without M*l in ep 5, its the happiest we ever see her and the most confident, yet she never gets this opportunity in the books.

Alina is also very insecure and jealous and we often see her pitted against other females, in particular Zoya. If there is one thing I really am not a fan of its authors pitting women against women particularly when it is over a man. Throughout all of the books Alina is insecure that Zoya is more beautiful than her and is insecure about her own looks, particularly when is comes to M*l, she is often jealous believing M*l will be turned by other pretty girls instead of him staying loyal to her. She often worries that she won't be good enough as the Sun Summoner and that the people will come to hate her. Again all of this would have been fine if it were limited to just the beginning of her story arc and it was something she overcame, but she never really does. She often comes across as being quite sulky as well. There was this one quote that I kept seeing in the tag that Alina says which is 'I am the Sun Summoner. It gets dark when I say it does.' Obviously before reading the books I kept wondering the circumstances of her saying this. It is a bit of a badass quote so naturally I was imaging all kinds of grand, dramatic scenarios, her shouting it across the battlefield to the darkling, her saying it in a war meeting as they are making plans as a way of instilling hope and confidence in her troops. So you can imagine my disappointment when it is actually said whilst she is lying outside on the ground, sad and feeling sorry for herself. When presented with a problem or a wrench in a plan she doesn't rally her team and try to come up with a solution instead she just sulks which as a reader I found very frustrating. The thing is both Alina and M*l are written as rather realistic teenagers, but the problem is this doesn't fit the world they are living in. They live in a world based off imperial russia and yet the characters do not behave as if they are, instead they act like they are modern day teenagers attending high school with petty jealousy and childhood crushes.

There is also her identity as a grisha and relationship with the grisha. One of the more interesting aspects of the grisha trilogy is the grisha's story, their oppression and their fight to be recognised as human beings and equals. Yet Alina shows very little care for the Grisha. In fact to me it seems like the author just made Alina grisha to serve the plot. Alina is grisha because the narrative needs her to be, they need her to be powerful enough to defeat the villainous darkling and destroy the fold. Instead of striving to improve things for the Grisha Alina supports the monarchy that has spent centuries oppressing them. The moment LB no longer needs Alina to be grisha she is stripped of the identity and the grisha are left in their misery in a world that still hunts, kills and enslaves them.

Alina is also often punished in the narrative by other characters but also by herself. She is often shamed for the attraction she felt towards the darkling and is called things like stupid girl. Not only is she blamed for falling for the darkling's manipulation she is also told she is greedy and power hungry for seeking out the amplifiers and political power. It's a very twisted message that is sent because we are told she is seeking the amplifiers to stop the villain which is a heroic cause and yet we are also told that she is doing out of greed. There seems to be this message that women should not seek power or a change in their position because that means they are greedy and evil.

Then after three books of the protagonist being used as a chess piece by the men in the story she gets one of the worst endings a heroine could. Both Nikolai and M*l get what they want in the end but its at a cost to Alina, Nikolai gets the Ravkan throne and M*l gets the quiet farm life with Alina as his wife. But Alina loses her powers and the position of power she got with them. The two things she explicitly asks for and tells us she desires, her position as general of the second army and her powers/amplifiers. In fact she even tells us in the second book that given a choice she would not give up her powers not even for M*l. Yet that is what happens and worse than that the narrative tells us that she was wrong and greedy for seeking power and influence, they present this ending she gets as a happy one because she gets to spend her life with M*l living a nice normal life. As a reader I found this difficult to except because the character had told us on many occasions that it was not what she wanted, we are shown often how miserable she is without her powers and yet we are expected to believe that this was some wonderful fairytale ending for her when it seems like whilst the men got their happy ever afters it was at the expense of Alina.

There is probably more but before this turns into a full on rant I think it best to leave it here.

#alina starkov #answered #anti leigh bardugo

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swanhookheart · 3 years

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Angry Grishaverse book review time!

After watching and LOVING s1 of Shadow and Bone, I read the trilogy! I was not impressed.

Spoilers incoming for Grishaverse stuff, so if you don’t want those, don’t read on!

Watching Shadow and Bone this past weekend, I was hooked : Darklina, the lore behind the amplifiers, the Aleksander backstory… I was really impressed and hoped that this was it--that at last, I’d found a fantasy series that was going somewhere big, something I could really, thoroughly sink my teeth into.

*Sigh*

Then I read the books.

The reader / viewer enters the Grishaverse associating darkness with pure evil. The Fold, described early on, is shown to be this bleak, awful, ruinous place where people go to be eaten alive by volcra and hope goes to die. We therefore, naturally, associate the Darkling--who possesses the power of shadow--with that evil from the off. I’m speaking as someone who only got into the Grishaverse last Saturday. My initial thoughts were, “oh, he’s being set up to be viewed as dark and scary; this is the expectation Bardugo wants us to have so that we’ll be blown away by some great twist later. Count me in!”

But that twist never came. He was set up as evil, and he stayed evil. Surprise, he’s the Black Heretic! Surprise, he’s an abomination effectively created by Morezova’s greed! Surprise, he’s ruthless and horrible and does cruel things! Except none of those things are actually surprising, given he was SET UP from the beginning to be viewed that way. He did bad things, walked a bad walk, and talked a bad talk. I kept thinking “ah, so he’s gonna get a sweeeet redemption arc,” and then he just never did. That element of the story was predictable to a nauseating degree, and that predictability made the entire universe feel a bit flat. If the reader saw more of his backstory, had more real, logical, sound justification for why he does the things he does (like in the show, where they at least tried to paint his actions as borne of some misplaced sense of servitude / protection for the Grisha or where we saw him actively struggling at points to grapple with the darkness inside him), then maybe the trilogy wouldn’t have been such a letdown. And yes, I know about his sacrifice or whatever later on. It’s not enough.

In villains, I and probably plenty of others like to see humanity. We want to empathize with our villains to a certain extent--to understand them just a little bit--so we can fully commit to hating them when they violate our trust. The Darkling didn’t have that human, redeeming quality, though--at least, not in the books. In the books, he was just a power-hungry jackass who simultaneously didn’t want to be alone and kept trying to kill his only opportunity not to be alone. His single-mindedness, his lack of human empathy, the simplicity with which he pursued this made him seem almost stupid to me as a reader. For someone who’s lived hundreds of years, he’s kind of an idiot when it comes to other people--which, itself, almost seems incongruous with his having lived for so long. If he’d maybe had more backstory or more in his story to justify his actions, maybe he’d feel like a better villain. But atm, all I’m doing is rolling my eyes with him. I couldn’t love him because he didn’t put in any work toward being a better person. Even in the end, he doesn’t actually do the work or repent. But I also can’t hate him because the source material hasn’t given me enough actual human qualities to hate or to feel betrayed. His character just… missed the mark for me.

As did Mal’s. Fucking MAL, oh my GOD! This dude’s literal only personality trait was loving Alina. Cool, he could track--for Alina, mostly. He could fight--for Alina. “I am become a blade”? Sir, you got a whole-ass tattoo announcing that you’re an object in this woman’s service? No WAP is worth that, and I’m speaking as a very bisexual woman. My dude, it’s weird, it’s extra, it’s just too much. I’ll go back to the Darkling for two seconds to say that, ofc, his actions were painted as problematic and misogynistic and gross. But, like, the possessiveness Mal displays with Alina kinda feels on that same level? Why are we pretending he’s better when he actively tries to keep her low, keep her powerless, and keep her his? Again, dude got a tattoo of her sigil. He was fully prepared to be the leader of her guard even if she married Nikolai just for the opportunity for some sexytimes. I know that YA is about really intense emotion, the fire of teenage hormones and stuff, but that all just felt a bit toxic. The way that his entire life revolved around her while she tried to balance the role of saint, hero, orphan, and all the things she was just felt goofy and like a wildly unhealthy dynamic.

Their whole relationship also felt really obvious, as I guess the Darkling being revealed as the trilogy’s big bad did. It was predictable, set up to be that way from the start. There were no surprises. It was Mal, and then it was still Mal, and in the end, it was also Mal. We weren’t really shown any of what made them so drawn to each other, we were just kind of told and expected to be fine with the intensity of it. But it read as being way too much for me, and god, it kept getting worse. Again, this one felt like low-hanging fruit--low effort, lazy writing. Nothing about it actually read to me as romantic, just as too much. They didn’t so much as fall in love as just start out that way, and reading that was somewhere between boring and uncomfortable. At least with the Darkling or hell--even Nikolai--we saw some of that chemistry unfold on the page. We were shown some of what made them work the way they did. There was something underpinning their relationship, and not just “oh, they’re supposed to be together”. I mean, after all JKR’s bullshit, I feel totally fine saying fuck authorial intent. If you can’t even be bothered to actually put your shit on the page, don’t ask me to blindly accept your version canon as gospel truth.

We could have had Deckerstar vibes, Beauty and the Beast vibes, seen light and dark come together and surprise us by actually working well together. But no, we saw a special girl lose everything that made her special and settle for some mediocre fuckboy from her hometown. We get characters that actually have the potential to be dynamic and make for a good story, but she still ends up with this bland, vanilla, trick-ass bitch? It’s a major letdown when you’ve actually been exposed to decent fictional couples, tbh.

OOF! And the ending? Oh jesus fuck, that ending. Darkling just… dies. Just like that. I read three whole books for that? I know he comes back and dies again and all, but the whole trilogy felt like it was building up to something more, something deeper and greater and more profound. He was horrible for the things he did, sure, and he deserved defeat as long as he refused to waver from his power-hungry, destructive path. But his death brought about no closure. He and Alina never actually had the fight they needed to or reached an understanding with each other. Everything is left undone, unsaid, unexplored. The ending just felt super anticlimactic on the page, and so, the trilogy as a whole fell completely short of any mark I hoped it might hit.

Did I hope Darklina would be endgame? Sure. But I’d also have been A-okay with a tragic ending if it had been done right. Did I think it would have been a lot more interesting to see a redemption arc for Darkling than just… more of the same? Or maybe Mal develop a personality outside of Alina? Absolutely. There was so much potential, and it really feels like Bardugo squandered all of it. And for what? This was nearly as disappointing as the eighth season of Game of Thrones. I probably won’t be watching future seasons if they follow the books, but I guess I’m glad for the day or so of fleeting pleasure I got when I still had hope for a properly told story.

#Shadow and bone #anti-mal #darklina #shadow and bone spoilers #grishaverse

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grimmradiance · 4 years

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Close to Me: How the Hollow Knight's Fighting Style Reflects Their Trauma (and the Radiance's as well)

So I've been trying to actually beat the Radiance, which means I've been fighting the Hollow Knight. A lot, as a matter of fact, since I'm beans at this game sometimes. I've also been thinking about @lost-kinn's meta about how fighting styles are how Vessels, especially the Little Knight, communicate.

In trying to apply this to the Hollow Knight, I've been coming to some very interesting conclusions, especially taken in context of...Everything Else in the lore, and Everything Else implicated in this by the psychology of it.

There's a lot to cover here, and it tracks through a LOT of different places, including trauma psychology, the relationship between chronic stress and lifespan health, and shape symbolism. Two warnings first:

One: this essay is gonna get heavy. It includes fine-grained discussion of the Hollow Knight's trauma, including discussions of the real-life machanics of psychological abuse, as well as the Extremely Concerning Implications of them harming themself during their boss fight. please read with caution and when you're in a safe emotional place to do so.

Two: This post is not a place for justifying the Pale King. If you read this essay in its entirety and still want to do that, please make your own post; my relationship to the Hollow Knight themself is deeply rooted in my own experiences, so in the context of this discussion I can't promise I won't take it personally.

With that out of the way, let's talk trauma and fighting styles:

We know that the Hollow Knight is trained to be a paragon of fighting skill, through the Pure Vessel fight, and this gives us a fantastic way to compare what they were like before they were made Government Assigned Radiance Jail, and after. Or, in other words, we're given the perfect opportunity to see what the Radiance is doing (i.e. context effects), and what Hollow is (i.e. what we can conclude is reliably consistent as a part of them). Listed here, for reference:

Hollow's attacks:

Three slashes

A dash slash

A Radiant Shade Soul, which launches a volley of Infection blobs in arcs

A Radiant Desolate Dive, which produces pillars of entwined Void and Light at random intervals

The Infection bursting out of them in random arcs, covering a significant amount of the aerial space of the arena

The Radiance ragdolling their body around trying to hit the Knight

Contact damage from them stabbing themself and falling over atop you

The Pure Vessel's attacks:

Three slashes

A dash slash

A Pure Shade Soul, which launches a volley of nails in straight lines

A Pure Desolate Dive, which produces nails at specific intervals

A Pure Focus, which causes circular explosions across most of the aerial space in the arena

Lashing out with a Void Arm (word choice intentional)

I've highlighted attacks from each battle that are different, since those are our points of interest here. In addition, both the Pure Vessel and Hollow are exceedingly fond of teleport-spamming in a way that is usually reserved for a specific group of bosses.

Another very important distinction between these two fights: the Pure Vessel doesn't scream. Well, they certainly try to, but no sound comes out. No voice to cry suffering, after all. All of these points have a lot to go into, so let's address them one at a time.

All That Remains: Theoretical Background On The Significance Of Constants

Making comparisons across time is important specifically because humans (and human-like bugs) change. Most personality traits aren't set in stone--they exist as an interaction of someone's internal tendencies, their experiences, and their environment. Speaking of those last two points, not all experiences and environments are created equally. Adverse childhood experiences (ACEs for short) are known to have lifelong implications for a child's health, both physically and mentally. These are events that are so stressful or stressful for so long that they exceed a child's ability to cope and become toxic stress (yes, that's the term in the literature, because it actively damages your organs). They compound, as well--the stress of one ACE makes it harder for a child to cope with another, especially if they overlap.

Some examples of ACEs? Being exposed to physical danger or the threat of physical danger, deprivation of normal social relationships with peers of a similar age, being forcibly seperated from family members, witnessing a loved one being hurt or killed, chronic illness in oneself or a family member, neglect of a child's emotional needs....

Poor fucking Holly. It's a miracle they didn't disintegrate under the pressure. The only other option is that they bent and adapted under that much stress--in other words, most of their personality has been forcibly reshaped by what they've gone through. Anyone who has up-close experience with parentification or complex child abuse already knows: this was by design. I'm not saying the intent was to traumatize the Pure Vessel past several points of no return, but the intent definitely was to reshape their personality for the purpose of being The Vessel. We only see them (the Pure Vessel) in battle after this process is mostly or entirely complete, but we do see them a few times beforehand. I'd like to draw attention to the Path of Pain cutscene right now.

I've seen people talking about the look the Vessel and the King share as a sign that TPK really does love his child. That might be true, but it's definitely not relevant when it comes to how abuse works. This is, in fact, exactly how the cycle of abuse uses affection as a tool. Long periods of abuse or neglect, smoothed over by small periods of affection that placate the survivor? That's textbook love bombing, the kind that forms stubborn trauma bonds and facilitates unhealthy dependency. Forgive me for not giving the Higher Being of knowledge and prescience the benefit of the doubt on that one. (/s)

Team Cherry knows about the importance of parallels and dissonance. There's a reason the music in the second phase of the Hollow Knight fight plays in the Path of Pain. There's a reason it cuts out the moment the battle with the Kingsmoulds is over, instead of at the room transition. There's a reason it doesn't cut out in the Black Egg. Actually, there's two potential reasons, which could also coexist: either little Hollow trusts the Pale King to keep them safe, even after the borderline torture that they were just subjected to, or big Hollow is so hypervigilant that they're in full functioning-through-trauma mode even while they're at death's door.

If you don't see how much the Pale King scarred his child at this point, I'm not sure we were playing the same game.

Walking the Straight Line: How the Pale King's Teachings Show In the Pure Vessel

The Pale King loves order and control. Everything about the White Palace and every decision we see him make implies this. Everything is spotless white walls and well-maintained gardens; the only signs of disorder are hidden away, either in his workshop or in The Pit™. This also reflects in the Pure Vessel's title--pure as in holy, but also pure as in without flaw. Considering the Nailsmith's emotional state after completing the Pure Nail, TPK's fate with his Perfect Controlled Kingdom, and the Godmaster ending as a whole, attaining perfection is not a good thing in any sense.

We know the Hollow Knight isn't perfect--that's the whole catalyst for the plot. But considering their upbringing and their fighting style as the Pure Vessel, their imperfections absolutely kill them emotionally. I'll spare the lecture on how perfectionism affects neurodivergent kids even more severely than neurotypical kids, if only to keep this post to a reasonable length (look up "twice-exceptional children" if you'd like to know the theory I'm glossing over in more depth). But, in essence, the deck is doubly stacked against them--they have a higher goal to reach, and far more obsctacles in their path, including their own emotional scars.

I've already discussed how Hollow isn't meant for this kind of stress in a physical sense in other posts. They're not prepared for it emotionally, either--the Pale King wants perfection, and they can't even stand up straight (every spoonie in the audience already knows how exhausting people's obsession with Standing Up Straight is). There's another page on their stack of emotional baggage, even BEFORE you consider that the Pure Vessel knows their perfection is what bought them a ticket out of the Abyss.

Bringing Teleportation To A Sword Fight: Where The Pure Vessel Reveals Their Fears

How else are they going to cope with that need for perfection, that need to prove themselves worthy of the reason their life was spared, by being flawless in any way they can? Being a mechanical, flawless fighter puts so much pressure on them, both literally (repetitive strain injuries fucking HURT) and figuratively--if you're predictable, the only sure way to win is to mop the floor with your opponents before they figure you out. Hell, that's the way most people play their first run of Hollow Knight, by throwing themselves at the bosses over and over until they figure out the patterns. That strategy is inherently going to fail against an opponent that's, say, an immortal higher being.

There's no way that the Vessel didn't figure this out, and yet none of their TPV specific attacks are positioned randomly--the nails are always evenly spaced, and the Focus explosions are always in a specific height region of the screen. That's clinging to survival strategies even when they become maladaptive in its purest form.

Another dip into psychological theory: let's talk about disorganized attachment. Attachment styles describe how someone's relationships to their main caregiver(s) influence their understanding on relationships in general. Disorganized attachment is a result of an upbringing of inherently unstable parent-child relationships, where there's no way of a child predicting whether an adult is going to be delighted to see them, ambivalent, upset, or otherwise. If my parent woke up some days saying "all right my child, time for the Infinite Buzzsaws Obstacle Course," I'd be the same way. In adulthood this manifests as an inability to form a stable sense of self-concept as well as concepts of others. Mission accomplished, TPK, there's no will to break if you broke it yourself.

This is where the fighting styles as communication comes in--Hollow needs to keep Ghost at a distance to fight, but also wants to be closer to their sibling (the only being who has a chance of understanding what they've been through), BUT also has a trauma-rooted fear of attaching to people, as their experiences with attachment are inherently unpredictable and dangerous. Hence, both the teleportation that doesn't seem to match their fighting style any more reliably than "aim at the thing attacking you" and the second attack unique to the Pure Vessel--they're quite literally lashing out in pain to push people away. There's a reason that attack is so reminiscent of the Thorns of Agony.

Of note is that Holly does seem to teleport like the bugs of the Soul Sanctum do (favoring the edges of a screen, rather than going wherever like Dream Warriors do), which makes sense--they're the most obvious answer to the question "how did they learn how to teleport, anyways?" However, Sanctum bugs have abilities designed to capitalize on this, like homing spells and slashes from above. I can only assume this means that someone saw Holly's proficiency with the nail and assumed it translated to other forms of combat, and didn't feel the need to give them at least a bit of a primer on how to make the best use of it. There's another tally for the Hollow Knight as an autism metaphor.

Trauma Bonds: How the Radiance Speaks Through Hollow

Now, we're back to the Black Egg, and two people stuck in the same sinking ship. The thing that makes this hurt so badly is that Holly and the Radiance are at complete cross purposes here, and yet they both want the same thing:

They both want out, no matter the cost. For the Radiance, this means forsaking the pacifistic nature of the moths and nuking Ghost personally.

For Hollow, this means forsaking the way they were raised and everything that was bludgeoned into their personality: the only way out is to fail, give up control, and trust that Ghost will do what needs to be done.

Imagine how much pain they're in to actually go for it. Going against a literal lifetime of conditioning is something that takes the average person years to even consider, let alone go through with. It's a form of learned helplessness--if you try to break free and fall, again and again, it actively discourages further attempts. Breaking through learned helplessness is an interesting process, because it generally involves re-establishing a sense of control by recalling previous events where the person was able to change their situation.

Which, as far as we know of, are nothing but traumatic memories for Hollow. It's very unlikely that they'd break through it on their own, but we know they have by the time we see the second phase of their fight. This is them at their most desperate: the same music as the Path of Pain, the way they let, or can't stop, the Radiance throw their body around, the way they actively try to let the Radiance out by stabbing themself.

You'd think that giving up and learned helplessness are inherently compatible, but when giving up both goes against your core personality, and involves your active participation, they're in direct opposition. So either Holly was able to process all their trauma by themself (which I doubt, judging by how much effort the player has to go through to even see Ghost's and Hollow's traumatic memories), or someone gave them a nudge or three in that direction.

Considering that there's been someone living in Holly's head who has a vested interest in them Not Doing Their Duty, I think we know who. And the thing is, I think we watch Hollow have this breakthrough during their battle. Imagine for the first time in decades, at least, you can move. You're in pain from being in the same position, probably hallucinating from sensory deprivation, with an infection sucking at what strength your body has left. And there's this little creature who looks ready to fight you, who seems to have let you go for that exact purpose.

And you look down, and both you and the Radiance recognize them from a place rooted deeper than consciousness, in the murky depths of trauma. You see the other Vessel who just as easily could have been you, and who looks so much stronger for not being you, for being an imperfect, willful creature. And the Radiance sees history threatening to repeat itself, another one of the Wyrm's cursed children seeking to lock her away once more.

What else do you do when you're triggered? You scream, and you go on instinct, and you retreat into your head. Those first blows, with the epic music? That's the Vessel the Pale King forged, the fighting machine that will endure unimaginable stress because it knows no other way. What snaps you back out of dissociation? Usually, either the passage of the triggering stimulus, or an even more relevant stimulus (severe pain from getting beaten up by a nail, for example).

The tragedy is this: we know this isn't a triumph. I think most of us went into that fight the first time, knowing we'd be putting the Hollow Knight out of their misery. The music turns tragic, Hollow screams, and then we see the Radiance and Hollow themself break through: the Radiance trying to fight Ghost directly with the resources she has, and Hollow trying to help her along.

For what it's worth, Hollow even had the right idea, when it came to letting themself rest while helping Ghost stop the madness their father started--they were just digging for the Radiance in the wrong place. The dynamic between the Radiance and the Hollow Knight is something I could write on for pages and pages, but this has gone on for long enough. Tune in next time, where I'll presumably talk about this same topic but in reverse with regards to the Radiance.

#hollow knight #hk #the pure vessel #the pale king #the radiance #my meta #the higher being speaks #i hate fact-checking my abuse infodumps because the ableism against personality disorders is EVERYWHERE #but here this monster of an essay is #anyways the hollow knight as a character sniped my trauma on sight #so i may be a tiny bit biased here But Also I'm Right #abuse //#child abuse //#emotional abuse //#i legit do not know what tags to throw on this #also the overarching title is a reference to the song of the same name from just shapes and beats because. yeah

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