for her birthday, kinji, truth worthy and loyal as he is, has kidnapped a pastry baker. for toni. whatever she wants, he will make. forever.

birthday day date!! / Accepting!

Now, Tonia has absolutely whined and complained about not having her own personal baker to make sweets for her forever, but she still wasn't expecting her wish to be granted by any means in spite of it all. The girl eyes the poor baker condemned into this eternal, no doubt unwilling servitude, wondering to herself...

"Make me a giant strawberry cake and some egg tarts. About two dozen tarts should be good for now." She claps her hands. "Chop chop! You can't leave the kitchen until you're done making them!"

Commands sufficiently relayed, she looks at Kinji with a bright smile. "Well, for once you've done your job as a butler. I'll tell my big brother to be nice to you later, as a little favor." She will also tell her brother that this fox kidnapped some poor guy off the streets for her birthday, because she still wants to see the potential scolding that will result from that.

how do the others meme era of the bridgerton brothers au meet their love match?

Kate is a model/dancer who stars in one of the band's music videos. While on set she overhears Anthony asking his brothers which of the dancers they plan on getting with and she is mightily unimpressed as he objectifies them, pointing out to his brothers which girl had the most cleavage on show or which one had the best bum. When Kate is introduced to Anthony as his love interest for the video she offers him nothing more than a forced smile in greeting and keeps her composure to not roll her eyes as he blatantly roves his gaze up and down her body. Ever the professional she makes it through the shoot without giving in to the urge to smack him across the face and by the end of the day she's more than ready to leave - but then Anthony catches her on her way out and with an arrogant grin asks her if she wants to go for a drink with him. Now off the clock, Kate tells him she'd rather stick pins in her eyes than willingly spend any time with him and she storms off, leaving him dumbfounded. If that was the last she thought she'd ever see of him; she thought wrong as somehow he seems to keep materialising at every single event and party she attends, and he always makes a beeline for her, desperate to win her over. At one party Colin chats with her, sharing his amusement that his brother is unable to get over the fact that she's the one girl who has ever rejected him, a fact which makes Kate feel very smug knowing just how much she has left Anthony rattled. Soon enough she actually enjoys seeing Anthony, purely because she loves the power she holds over him. It definitely has nothing to do with the fact that she's gradually becoming very fond of him, acknowledging just how charming he can be, and respectfully she can admit that he is a very handsome man - but it doesn't mean she likes him. Absolutely not... except, the day after Anthony's birthday she wakes up in his bed and in the cold hard light of day she can't believe she's ended up becoming yet another woman in a long line of his many conquests. Just as she's scrambling up to dash out, Anthony returns with breakfast in bed, much to Kate's surprise. She asks if he's always so generous with his one night stands and she watches his face falter before he quietly says he doesn't want this to be a one time thing. Kate then hesitantly enquires if by that he means he wants to be fuck buddies and once again she's perplexed when his face falls in response. He then states he had hoped that this would be the start of something special, of being a couple, of having someone to come home to everyday. Kate truly hadn't expected such a declaration and initially tries to reason that they wouldn't work in the slightest before Anthony blurts out that he's in love with her and implores her to give him a chance. She had never been in such a position before, had never experienced anyone fixing her with the most adoring of heart-eyes and truly she had never felt so loved and desired - and so, despite the reservations that lingered in her head, she decided to follow her heart and embrace the chance of a fulfilling relationship with Anthony; and she never looked back.

Meanwhile Penelope has known the Bridgertons for years, being best friends with Eloise to start with but over time develops a close bond with Colin. From a young age Penelope possessed a creative soul and loved to write stories and poems, and then one day when she was at the Bridgertons Colin got his guitar out and asked her if she wanted to write a song with him. Together they wrote a silly little song that entertained his younger siblings and from then on they continued writing songs together, and as they got older their song-writing ability flourished to the point that the songs they wrote were actually good, so good in fact that when Colin and his older brothers got a record deal several of the songs he wrote with Penelope made it onto the album. From then on Colin and Penelope collaborated to write a good chunk of the Bridgerton Brothers songs, including some of their biggest hits, and from then Penelope even had her hand in co-writing songs for other artists. Closer than ever before (even closer than her friendship with Eloise), the feelings Penelope had possessed for him since she had first met him only deepened and it was getting to a point that she began to believe he might feel the same way for her. He was so affectionate with her, always confided with her, never going a day without speaking to her, and telling her just how much he cares about her; she truly felt as though her feelings might finally be reciprocated. However, all her hopes were dashed the day she heard him declaring to his brothers that he'd never date her. Heartbroken, Penelope ghosted Colin, refusing to answer his calls and messages, and stopped writing for the band and instead provided her writing expertise to other artists. Colin was upset and desperate for her forgiveness but she refused to talk to him and as a result he lost all confidence in his own song-writing ability, feeling lost without Penelope's partnership and faith in him. Then one night Colin's phone rings and he is shocked but relieved to see Penelope's name flashing up. When he answers the call Penelope curtly tells him to leave her alone, sick to death of the countless messages he's sent her everyday since she stopped talking to him. Before she can hang up he desperately begs for her to hear him out and profusely apologises for saying something so hurtful, that he hates himself for upsetting her, and tells her just how much he misses her. With a sigh Penelope says she forgives him, that she knows he's not a bad person; but that she needs space. When he asks why they can't go back to the way things were Penelope can't hold it in any longer and tearfully confesses that she's in love with him and always has been and that it hurts too much to see or even talk to him, not that she now knows that he could never see her in the way she sees him. She requests that he gives her time and space and hopefully one day they might be able to just be friends once she's had time to heal. Colin is left in shock by his best friend's admission and doesn't quite know how to feel knowing he's broken the heart of the person he cares the most about. He's distracted by Benedict's own heartbreak, focusing on consoling his brother as he tries to wrap his head around the heartbreak he's caused Penelope. Once his brother finally works things out with Sophie, as well as seeing how loved up Kate and Anthony are, Colin can't stop thinking about Penelope and starts to imagine scenes of kissing her before he goes onstage just like Anthony does with Kate, or cuddling Penelope in his lap just how Benedict does with Sophie. It then hits him all at once; he's in love with Penelope and he can't wait a minute longer to tell her. He bangs on her door and when she opens it she's shocked to see him, and even more shocked when he grabs a hold of her and kisses her. That first kiss is enough to confirm everything between them, and after telling her he's in love with her they stumble their way into the bedroom to make up for lost time.

my only exception

(i don’t own this gif or any of the characters in this fic)

summary: you and nat are separated when in the Red Room. you both are reunited. after holding onto a couple things to give her for a couple years you both realize love is well and alive.

warnings: violence, abuse, swearing, lil angst, fluff

pairing: natasha romanoff x fem!reader

word count: nearly 1.8k

a/n: omg i don’t know what to say! thank you for all the support on the stuff i’ve released so far. it’s super crazy seeing some of my favorite writers following me. thank you so so much for 30 followers! much love 💕💕

(italics in dialogue mean the person is speaking russian)

sorry for any mistakes i wrote this at 3am and have to get up for school at 6 😪 no bueno

It was a cold and stormy night as the power in the Red Room continuously flickered on and off even with the help of a high powered generator.

You and Natalia had been waiting for an event like this to occur so you could break out. Even though both herself and you lived only a small bit of life outside in the real world before you were taken in and trained to become a weapon, both of your humanly morals knew right from wrong. The Red Room’s treatment definitely being a wrong.

Madame B and the other monstrous staff at this facility put all you girls to bed roughly an hour ago. Nat and yourself undid your cuffs connecting your wrist to the metal bedframe so you could pack the few things you both owned before you made your escape. Both of you had talked this plan over through and through so you both were on the same page as soon as you saw that flicker of a power outage surge though the site.

At the moment you both were eighteen years old meaning both of you had proven yourselves worthy enough to hone a spot at this academy and had graduated a couple months prior.

GAME PLAN

Some information you had gathered which the staff weren’t aware of was every time the power flickered off, it disarmed and unlocked the exit door/s for nearly five seconds. The weather has been dry but cold lately not making this discovery too useful. The plan was to sneak over to uncuff yourselves in the middle of the night when these brief power outages were occurring, pack your items, and as you were about to escape bang on the wall of the large room where the girls kept at the academy would sleep to create enough of a distraction before you were out and free for good. Easy right? How wrong you’d be.

When it was time for the distraction, Nat stood by the door waiting for the next surge of lightning of whatever broke the electricities stability as you walked to the far side of the sleeping quarters where you were sure you’d have enough time to bang on the walls and sprint out of that door.

You heard a crash of thunder so you knew your escape chance would be soon. As you were about to start banging on the walls you see a door knob parallel to Nat but far away none the less start turning.

BAM

Lightning strikes, what seems to be right outside of the building. You sprint for the door only to have your arm caught by one of Madame B’s henchmen.

Just like that the power flickers.

five.

Without much thought you break away from the man’s grasp lunge at Natalia who happened to be at the door.

four.

“We’ll meet again Natalia.” you speak softly

three.

You shove her out of the door with all of your might.

two.

You use all of your remaining strength that you can muster up to slam the heavy metal door closed.

one.

Click

The door locks once again.

“You stupid little bitch. Get over here NOW!” the man practically growls.

You slowly and steadily walk over to the man as he gruesomely pummels and kicks you.

Sure the beatings, mind torture and manipulation hurt, but you’ve never experienced any kind of pain on the same caliber to what being separated from Natalia feels like.

Madame B is more than disappointed, enraged and annoyed with one of her ‘star students’. You receive daily beatings and long, tiresome training hours for helping Natalia escape. Although everyone is ‘replaceable’ in the minds of the staff as well as Madame B, they just lost Natalia so they couldn’t afford to lose you as well.

Months later the beatings finally slow down to a couple a week which you are able to endure. Madame’s mission now is to make a monster out of you by pushing you to and past your limits when training.

One night you finally drift off to sleep. You hate sleeping. It’s a constant replay of your last night with Nat. Only hoping that she made it to civilization safe and sound and is living a normal teens life. However, tonight’s dream is different. In this dream you see yourself shoving your packed-escape bag between your mattress and bedframe as you are bleeding out on the ground from the beatings. You wake up in a cold sweat and manage to kneel on the ground and slowly lift up your mattress only to find that same, small bag filled with the few, but important belongings of yours and Nat’s. You open up the bag forgetting all about what you both had packed. The most important items you see is a picture of Natalia as a toddler with alongside her mother and father, a small metal ring which you had made for her after stealing a small teaspoon at dinner, banging it against the concrete floor with a rock to flatten it out as you’d continuously bend it back and fourth so only the thinnest part is of the spoon is left which you bend into a ring before surprising Nat with it after you know she had a pretty rough day training, and lastly Nat’s papers containing important info about her such as her full name, birthplace, parents names, and birthdate.

November 22, 1984

November 22, 1984

November 22, 1984

November 22, 1984

You make sure you have this date burned into your head, latching onto any important information about her you can learn.

You hang onto those three items keeping them hidden.

Two and a half years later...

It’s late at night when you hear gunshots and fights breaking out throughout the facility. You quickly get up out of bed (once again undoing your cuffs) and grab those three items from under your mattress. You place them in your pocket getting ready to make a break for the outside world. As you reach for the door you turn back taking one last look at the place you’ve been living for pretty much the entirety of your life, only before a man in a funny red, white, and blue costume enters your view.

You bring your hands up ready for a fight.

“Look kid, I’m not here to fight you. We are breaking you out.” the man ensures

“Who even are you?” you sternly question

“Steve Rogers. But the public calls me Captain America.” his gaze settles on your figure, “Mind telling me who you are?” he pushes

“Names y/n, but look I’ve got places to be ma-“ you are cut off when Captain America’s jaw drops.

“No, we both know you don’t. But, you ARE coming with me.” you know there isn’t much room for protest but that won’t stop you from trying. You lunge at him and push him to the ground as you wave a small goodbye and sprint towards the door only for your body to fall on the ground limp. Realizing you’ve been stunned by something temporarily.

“YOU MOTHERFUCKER!” you shriek, he only chuckles.

“God, Nat was right about you.” she shakes he head with a small grin on his face.

“N-nat?” you whisper as you vision fades black.

You regain consciousness and look around only to find yourself in a weird windowy, loud vehicle type thing. You see a group of people standing around you but you see one particular familiar face hovering directly over yours lightly combing through your hair with one one hand and gently outlining your jawline with the other.

“NAT!” you screech, your brain is feeling too many emotions to comprehend at the moment.

Once she sees and hears you are awake she pulls you into a bone crushing hug.

“Y/n/n I’m so sorry I left you and you had to stay in that hellhole for so long alone I don’t know how I would’ve help up it if that-“ you cut her off

“Natalia, all that matters is I’m here with you right now.” you reason.

After getting off of what you learned is a ‘plane’ you and Nat spend hours together clinging onto one another as if, as soon as you separate you will be absent in her life for another couple years, vice versa.

Months pass by. Even though you and Nat have yet to label yourselves as a couple your hearts belong to one another after being attached to the hip to one another for pretty much every activity or mission you both do. In this time you were also recruited as an Avenger due to your skillful hand to hand combat and your masterful types of fighting you have nearly perfected from your time in the room.

The date just happens to be November 22. You are pretty sure no one in the compound is aware of Natalia’s birthday, hell, you aren’t even sure if she’s aware.

Today is the day you decide to return the missing items from her bag that you recover after she left.

You wake up next to her and wake her up with a long, graceful, soft kiss on her lips to which she responds shortly after by kissing you back as you feel as tiny smirk against your own lips.

“Hey, what was that for?” she asks playfully

“Ohhh nothing. Just maybe it’s for my favorite girl’s special day today.” Nat blushes.

“H-how’d you know?”

“Oh honey, I know e v e r y t h i n g.” you reply

Before she can respond you pull her to sit up on your shared bed and hand her an envelope containing her papers as well as he one and only photo of herself and her family.

As soon as she sees both items she sobs into your chest. (more because of the picture, you really only included her papers so she too would know all the most crucial parts of her life pre-red room era.

“Uh, uh, uh’” you tut,”One more thing.” you reach for her hand slowly and tell her to shut her eyes. You slowly slide the makeshift ring on her finger.

“Open.” you instruct

To which she gasps at the sight and just like the day you both were reunited you hugged and kissed for hours on end.

“Nat, will you be my girlfriend?” you ask with a sheepish smile.

“Of course y/n/n, I thought you’d never ask.” she takes a breath,“I know love is for children, but you are my only exception.”

“Ditto.” Natalia chuckles, “That is what the Americans say, right?” you backtrack with flushed cheeks.

She holds you tighter and presses a soft kiss to your forehead.

“Sure.” she breathes out.

Yuta-Nakamots’ NCT 127 Masterlist 

Welcome to my masterlist! Please make sure to check out the guidelines for rules about my writings and feel free to take a look at the upcoming release schedule. Be sure to join my general taglist if you’d like to be tagged in my future works. Thank you and have a nice day!

Key

Genres f || Fluff a || Angst s || Smut m || Horror and other mature genres t || Action

Extras ✧ || 200+ notes ™ || ToMie TradeMarked (inspired by a dream I had)

m . t a e i l

The Christmas Song (f) || Teaser || - Single Parent!Taeil x Single Parent!Reader - 4.7k

It wasn’t uncommon for when the weather grows colder, many hearts do as well. Though you hoped this was not true in the case of yours and Taeil’s, that the warmth of each other’s hearts would be enough to break the ice. Part of the Taste of Winter Collab.​  Part of the NeoWinter Festival and the NeoHoliday Festival.

s . j o h n n y

Touch (f,s) ™ || Teaser || - Volleyball!Johnny x Reader - 8.6k

As a first year student majoring in English, you would have never thought that you’d end up working for the sports news network at your university. Even more so, flirting with one of your coworkers who happens to be on the men’s volleyball team. Part of the NCT Sports Collab.​

[2:50pm] WAP (f) - Boyfriend!Johnny x GN Reader - 0.2k

l . t a e y o n g

Back 2 U (f,a,s,m,t) || Teaser || Prologue || Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Part 5 || - Gang Member!Taeyong x Gang Member!Reader - 27.2k (ongoing)

To ensure the fate of your gang in the new era, your parents decide to arrange a marriage with the most powerful clan, the Lee clan. Taeyong, the up and coming leader of the clan, is soon at your beck and call, ready to give anything for you even if it’s his own life. Inspired by @choco-mark’s series, A Marriage Of Inconvenience.

✧ Tiger Inside (f,s) || Teaser || - Hybrid!Taeyong x Reader - 6k

Your life in quarantine is as boring as normal until your long-time boyfriend Taeyong wakes up with new features, specifically those of a tiger. Neither of you know what to do besides continuing on with your daily lives and accommodating to his new habits. Part of the Wasn’t On Pawpose Collab.​

Long Flight (f,a,m) ™ - Among Us!Taeyong x Among Us!Reader - 5.6k

Join your crewmates in a multiplayer game of teamwork and betrayal! But beware…as there may be an impostor aboard! Their goal is to eliminate the rest of the crew and they will sabotage the ship, sneak through vents, deceive, and frame others to remain anonymous and kill off the crew. Part of the Neo Clock Event. Check out the masterlist here.

✧ Summer 127 (f,s) ™ - Boyfriend!Taeyong x Reader - 2.3k

Going to a waterpark was a great way to beat the summer heat though things only seem to get hotter while you’re there.  Part of the the Sunny Side Event​. Check out the masterlist here.

Stuck With You (f) - Boyfriend!Taeyong x Reader - 4.3k

Going on vacation with Taeyong for his 26th birthday was already a gift in itself but it made you realize that there’s no one else you’d rather be stuck with for a the rest of your life than him.  Part of the Around the World in 31 Days Event. Check out the masterlist here. Part of the TaeTae Day Event. check out the masterlist here.

n . y u t a

✧ Playing Games (f,a,s) || Teaser || - Frat Boy!Yuta x Reader - 11.2k

Yuta is a notorious frat boy known for sleeping around with tons of girls yet never getting into a relationship. You never would have thought you’d become entangled with him until fate ends up placing both of you in the same beginner guitar class during your spring semester. Part of the Bingo Collab. Check out the masterlist here.

Pandora’s Box (f) || Teaser || - Soccer!Yuta x Reader 

Yuta was one of the best offensive players on your university’s soccer team yet his defense was just as strong. Namely, his emotional defense. It became a personal goal of yours to break away into his heart and score points in your favor. Part of the Quarter Life Shenanigans Collab.

[12:57pm] From Home (f) - Boyfriend!Yuta x GN Reader - 0.3k

[5:04pm] Fly Away With Me (f) ™ - Dad!Yuta x GN Reader - 0.5k

k . d o y o u n g

Good Thing (f) ™ - Love Alarm!Doyoung x Reader - 1.6k

The Love Alarm app makes it easier than ever to find love but things never seem to be in your favor. You have come to doubt the sensibility of it because, do you really need an app to find love? Part of the Love Alarm Event. Check out the masterlist here.

Highway To Heaven (f,a) || Teaser || - Street Racer!Doyoung x Reader - 4.6k

Doyoung was one of the biggest names in street racing though part of him knew he couldn’t compete forever. But just like a checkered flag, the day he finished his racing career came sooner than he expected. Part of the Adrenaline Rush! Collab​

[7:13pm] White Night (f) ™ - Vampire!Doyoung x Vampire!Reader - 0.2k

Part of the NeoWinter Festival.

j . j a e h y u n

✧ Baby Don’t Like It (f,a,s) ™ - Idol!Jaehyun x Idol!Reader, Idol!Yuta x Idol!Reader - 9.8k

Relationships can get messy as seen by the way you’ve managed to fuck up one that you weren’t even officially in to begin with but at least your boyfriend seems pretty supportive of it all. Part of the 23 Days of Christmas Event​. Check out the masterlist here.

✧ Whiplash (f,a,s) || Teaser || - University!Jaehyun x Reader, University!Jungwoo x Reader - 10.7k

After your letters to your two crushes, who you thought you’d never have a chance with, are mistakenly received, you’re greeted by a world of indecisiveness. You don’t know which way to go, which man to go with, and every choice you make feels like getting whiplash. Part of the To All the Members I’ve Loved Before Collab​. Check out the masterlist here. Part of the Summer ‘127 Event. check out the masterlist here.

Friend In Me (f) - University!Jaehyun x Reader - 0.9k

Not one for costumes, you weren’t over the moon showing up to a Halloween party dressed as Bo Peep with her three sheep. A drunk Buzz Lightyear and a handsome sheriff Woody quickly change your mind about that, though. Part of the NeoHalloween writing festival. Check out the masterlist here.

[12:10pm] Paper Plane (f) ™ - Physics Teacher!Jaehyun x Student Teacher!Reader - 0.5k

k . j u n g w o o

The Hangover (Def Leppard x Reader)

(Happy birthday to my blog!! To celebrate 3 years of the place where I concentrate my insane Leppard obsession, I thought I’d celebrate by posting the FIRST Def Leppard fanfic I EVER wrote ((which I have NEVER posted anywhere before!)) I began writing this exactly 3 years ago today- the day I made this blog ((February 19th, 2018))- and officially finished it about a year later. This is not intended as a romantic/sexual fic, it’s simply just an x reader in which the reader is basically one of the guys. In other words, it’s on crack.)

((I am aware this is kind of cringe-worthy at times... but I still like a lot of things about it. While I revised it very slightly before queuing it,  I was still 16 when I started writing this, okay... gimme a break...))

(Illustration by @paper-sxn​)

Words: 8,684 Prompt: Dublin, 1984. You’re with the Leppards in their early pre-Hysteria era house. You all wake up with hangovers after a boozed-up night at home, and you each try to put the pieces of the previous night back together. Meanwhile, you’re praying that one particular piece won’t fit in anywhere... (partially inspired by the “Blitzgiving” and “The Pineapple Incident” episodes of How I Met Your Mother)

-----

Gently piercing white light made its way through the windows of the bedroom. It hit your eyelids, and it hit your brain, igniting a brief but killer headache. As your eyes clasped together more, you turned your face into the gloriously soft pillow. For a second you asked yourself why you would have a headache so early in the morning, but then…

You laughed quietly into the bed, recalling without warning some vague happenings from the night before. There wasn’t much you remembered, but you clearly saw the image of the guys flat out drunk at some point (you along with them). There were some blips of you all singing together, Sav hanging from a door frame, you chugging some scotch, Joe chugging some vodka, Steve’s hair being in pigtails, and you think Phil might’ve been giving you a lap dance... or vice versa. It was, all in all, hysterical (at least- that’s what you wanted to think).

 Other than those faint events, unfortunately, the night was gone. Still, you were thrilled that it happened. Crazy times with your boys were always good.

You rubbed your eyes, ready for more sleep to combat the pounding in your head. When you did, they opened a little, and you realized… this wasn't your room you were in. Squinting around, you noticed that you were sleeping in Phil’s room instead of yours.

Oh, it’s not that much of a problem, you mused, I’m sure he doesn’t mind. I’ve woken up to worse in this place.

You let your eyes close again easily, and you found peace as you began to fall under again. That is, until you felt someone move next to you.

When it happened, you became aware of the warmth coming from someone else in the bed. They only shifted in their sleep a little bit before going still again. Your eyes went wide, and you held your breath. You don’t remember getting into bed with someone (in fact, you don’t remember getting into bed at all). Turning your head, you looked to see what sort of stranger was in bed with you currently. Instead of a stranger, scraggly blonde hair over a kind and shy face met your sight, and you were instantly calmed upon realizing that it was just Steve. That was good, that was good, but why were you and Steve sleeping in Phil’s bed? You were sure you didn’t have sex last night- at least, not with Steve. This tiny moment of appeasement and confusion was cut short by the faint sound of guitar chords coming from downstairs. The music echoed to your ears, signaling that it had to be Phil, and that he was playing the opening to Bringin On the Heartbreak. Cautiously taking the covers off you- not wanting to wake Steve- you felt obliged to go to the other guitarist. When you stood up and began walking, you nearly fell forward from the sudden vertigo of your hangover. You had to hold onto the counter of Phil’s dresser for extra support, and that’s when your reflection in his mirror caught your eye. Not only that, but that’s when your outfit also caught your eye. One of the guys’ Union Jack tank tops had been slipped over you somehow, and two hand prints were on either side of your face in dried paint; one was blue, one was green. "What…?“ you whispered, touching your face and feeling the shirt on you. It seemed to fit you alright, which made you wonder whose it really was. You were also in black underwear, and nothing else. While eyeing yourself, you took notice of Steve in the reflection. You now saw a few big red lipstick stains on his face, untouched and unsmudged. It was pretty cute, you had to admit, but another thing that came to your attention was that it wasn’t you who was wearing the lipstick at the moment. So then who kissed Steve all over his face? You treaded carefully down the hallway, putting one foot in front of the other and dragging a hand on the wall for support. The melody of the distant guitar didn’t cease the whole time you trekked through the house to get to Phil. When the chords of the song dragged on to the part where the vocals should have begun, no vocals came. Everything in the house looked remarkably the same (despite everything you remember from last night). There were large, ripped pieces of cardboard in the middle of the hallway;  scattered out as if leaving a trail. Alongside that, there was a piece of paper labeled “pay 2 the orerr of Rick: one fuckin bendee straw” in what may have been Sav’s handwriting on top of the stairs, and blue paint smudged on the railing going downwards (guaranteeing that whoever did that eventually got to your face, too).

Step by step you descended as the scenery of the house teetered around you (a little too reminiscent of Me & My Wine, you would add). When you reached the bottom of the stairs and looked into the living room, sure enough, Phil was there, strumming away.

“But it’s easy come and easy go…” he hummed.

“You’re…” you mumbled, burped a little, and continued, “Awake. How?” He stopped playing and crossed his arms, quietly sassing you, “Ah, she rises again. You regrettin’ anything yet?” You blinked and rubbed your eyes, scratching a little bit of paint off of your face and inquiring in a scratchy, tired tone, “I guess so… but- how? You, how?” Phil took off his guitar and stood up with his hands in his pockets, “Because I barely drank at all last night, and I also sure as hell didn’t shag Steve in someone else’s bed!” “How do you mean- I didn’t- wait- and Steve- what?” you rubbed your head, getting dizzy, causing Phil to guide you to the couch. “I didn’t- I didn’t shag Steve last night,” you insisted. “Mm hmm,” the guitarist hummed disapprovingly, “Alright.” “What the hell are you on about?” Phil smirked evilly and laughed, “He carried you upstairs, we heard the door close, and then some rather happy noises were heard, so we all just assumed-!” “That’s not-” you swallowed and lay your head back on the couch, “-a valid assumption.” “Oh, you poor thing,” came the sarcastic remark, “You really don’t remember, do you?” “Well I figured if I ever fucked any one of you I would- you know- remember it!” you raised your voice at him, then rubbed your temples. “I’m touched, really. But I’ll fill you in a bit,” Phil yanked up his guitar he’d put down, placed himself next to you, and played the into to “Ballroom Blitz”. Then a bit of the night came back to you. “Oh... that’s what started it all, didn’t it?”

~The night before~ Rick began banging out a tune on his drum kit in the house with you, Sav, and Steve sitting close by, them being at the ready with their guitars. “You ready, Steve?” you mimicked the original lyrics. “Uh-huh,” he replied exactly like Steve Priest in the original song. “Savy?” you said next. “Yeah,” Sav bopped his head to the beat. “Rick?” “Okay.” “Alright, fellas,” you called out, “Let’s go!” The two guitarists let their instruments ring out around the house, playing the all-too-familar tune. As soon as they started this, the front door opened, and none other than Phil and Joe walked in. Joe was holding a bag that was weighed down by the mass inside it (a painfully obvious sign that there were a few bottles of booze). Although the two of them weren’t talking, they were physically hushed upon hearing the situation you and the others had created. “Oh life’s been getting so hard, living with the things you do to me…” you sang lowly and quietly along with the music being made, just to make sure the musicians knew their places. You noticed Phil run out of the room in excitement, and into the one where he keeps his guitars. Joe, on the other hand, stayed put and watched the rest of you from afar, fighting a smile. “My dreams are getting so strange, I’d like to tell you everything I see…” You stood up, and Joe began walking towards you when you called out the next line of the song, “Oh- I see a man in the back, as a matter of fact, his eyes are as red as a sun!” Joe chimed in without warning at the next line, putting an arm on your shoulder and pointing at you, “And the girl in the corner, let no one ignore her, ‘cos she thinks she’s the passionate one!” *** “It’s, it’s a ballroom blitz, it's, it's a ballroom blitz,” Phil sang the ending teasingly to you when he put his guitar back. It felt like he was rubbing his energy in your face (since you lacked it). Before Phil could continue, Joe suddenly appeared in the doorway. “Yeah! It’s a ballroom blitz!” he announced, throwing his arms into the air and taking a bow. He sounded a bit tipsy still. Joe was wearing his Union Jack shorts, but no shirt. Instead of a shirt, though, he had the words “PROPERTY OF DEF LEPPARD” sloppily painted across his chest in blue and green paint. Right over his nipples there were also two handprints, almost exactly matching the ones on your face. Joe stumbled in the doorway, falling to his knees and groaning in discomfort, “Ohh... probably should’ve stayed in bed.” Phil sluggishly trekked over to the singer and pulled him partially to his feet, yanking him towards the couch, “Oh yeah? And by ‘bed’, you mean-?” “Definitely not the bathtub.” Joe assured him, but winked at you. “No matter where you slept, it’s still not as bad as where she slept,” Phil pointed at you, “And what she did there.” “Why? What’d you do?” Joe’s tipsiness wore away in his sentence, making him sound genuinely concerned and curious. You rolled your eyes, knowing exactly what Phil was going to say, “Phil, I-” “It’s not what she did, it’s who she did- she shagged Steve in my bed!” the guitarist accused you again while pointing a finger. Immediately Joe exclaimed, “Nice!” and held up a hand to high-five you. “Joe!” you scolded him, surprised that he took this as good news. “Oh-uh, not… nice?” he took away the offer of a high-five and scratched the back of his head awkwardly instead, “Also, is that my shirt?” You took a look down at the Union Jack tank top you were wearing and back at Joe’s torso. Then something clicked in your head. “Ohh…” you continued staring at Joe’s chest, feeling yourself blush as old memories unraveled in your head, “I think... I think I remember something else that happened last night.” *** You were all drunk; it was no lie. After your quick jam session, there was a booze-filled music fest going on in the house. Joe had even put on his Union Jack outfit, pretending he was getting ready for a show. At one particular point of this “festival” you'd all created, records were being played, and you ended up dancing in front of Joe to REO Speedwagon’s “Take It On the Run”. “You’re bringing up your white lines, you’re pullin’ on a bedroom eyes, you say you’re going home, but I won’t say when,” you sang the wrong lyrics as you swayed and drunkingly made flirty faces at Joe on the couch. Sav, meanwhile, was playing with some old craft paint off in the corner. The blue and green substances were all over his hands (but somehow, one color managed to stay on each hand). “Yeah, you dance for him, Y/N!” Rick cheered you on from the kitchen as Steve and Phil sat on the couch. Phil was perfectly sober, and Steve was giggling and laying with his head on Phil’s lap. You, on the other hand, were now moving closer to the singer, almost like you were giving him a lap dance. “You take it on the run, baby,” you sang along, slowly taking Joe’s Union Jack tank top off of him (with no objections from below), “If that’s the way you wanna, baby...” In return to Joe being shirtless, you slowly took off your own shirt (triggering wolf-whistles and cheers from the guys) to replace it with Joe’s tank. “Sav, mark him up!” you ordered the painted bassist in the corner as you tried to dress yourself. He happily made his way over to you and questioned, “What should I mark him with?” A single hazy idea came to you, and you eagerly whispered it into Sav’s ear. He giggled in response, and proceeded to move over to Joe, drawing something on his chest in the paint. To keep Joe from looking at what it was, you went behind the chair and covered his eyes, ordering coyly, “No peeking!” “All done!” Sav announced and retreated back to whatever he was doing in the corner. “Now, wait, Sav!” you sped over to him, lifted his hands up, and double high-fived him, getting the paint on your hands as well. To finish off what Sav had started, you ran back over to Joe on the chair, and slapped your hands on his chest, right over his nipples. Laughter erupted from everyone in the room (including Joe) and you repeated Sav’s words. “All done!” Joe gazed down at the words “PROPERTY OF DEF LEPPARD” on his chest as you continued to dance to the song playing. “You’re mine, now! You take it on the run, baby... if that’s the way you want it, baby...” Joe tried to tell you in a sexy voice, “Am I your baby now?” “If that’s the way you want it baby,” you repeated the words from the song to him, “Now I’m done dancing for you! Somebody dance for me!” Steve began pointing at everyone individually, childishly suggesting, “It should be, eenie, meenie, miney, Phil!” “Why me?” Phil laughed in objection as you took a seat across the room. “Because you’re not wasted,” his terror twin argued, poking him on the nose. The sober guitarist looked over at you with happy anticipation, awaiting a comment, while all you did was wiggle your fingers at him with a goofy grin. After that, you returned the gesture to the man on his lap, giving Steve a sexy wink. *** “Oh my god...” you put your head in your hands shamefully as Phil and Joe giggled at the memory of the previous night, “I can’t believe I did all that...” “That was a treat!” Phil laughed, hugging you from the side and pulling you closer to him in consolation, “It was funny! We never get to see that side of you!” “There’s a certain reason why you don’t...” you moaned with embarrassment, then asked out of guilty curiosity, “How many times did I grab your ass during that lap dance...?" Phil thought for a bit before telling you, “Four. Well- four and a half...” You gave a loud groan of protest as Joe laughed and slumped back into the couch. “Oh, you only did those things because you weren’t thinking!” Phil consoled you, swayed back and forth with you in his arms. Joe chimed in, “Yeah, and see what happens when you don’t think? You do! Most importantly, you do Steve!” “I didn't do Steve!” you shot your head up and yelled at Joe. You received only laughs and snorts from both men in reply. Suddenly, Sav appeared on the staircase and began singing “Squeeze Box” by The Who with a tired yet cheeky smirk, “Mama’s got a squeeze box she wears on her chest, and when Stephen comes home, he never gets no rest-” Joe and Phil joined into his song with, “Cos' she’s playin’ all night, and the music’s alright! Mama’s got a squeeze box, Stephen never sleeps at night!” You just put your head back in your hands, trying not to accept your fate of being teased. You didn’t want to think that you possibly shagged Steve. He always seemed so innocent to you in a way, and you feared that this would kill your friendship. If everything the boys said was true, you would never hear the end of it, and you don’t even know what Steve would think of you from now on. Was it possible that he remembered anything about the night before? “It didn’t happen, it didn’t happen...” you repeated to yourself in a whisper as Phil unwrapped his arms from you. Sav came all the way down the stairs; his body language making him look grumpy with the world, but his tired grin signaling that he was pleased with seeing you. “Oh, it happened, sunshine!” the frizzy-haired bassist laughed, but quickly regretted it and rubbed his head with his still-painted hands, “Ah- yep, it happened. You could probably hear you two up the whole damn street.” As Sav wearily joined you all on the couch, Joe complained, “Sounds like that was a treat; I wish I remembered it!” Phil was caught off guard at the comment. His head turned to Joe in the blink of an eye and gasped, “Wait, you don’t remember hearing them?!” “I wish I could say I do, but there’s nothing there,” Joe stood up after he spoke, and quickly held onto the wall nearby. His hand went over his stomach as he whined, “Oh... fuck, Y/N, why did you make me race you last night?" “'Race me'?” you squinted as you inquired, “Race you with what?” Joe didn’t answer, but slowly took steps into the kitchen, using the wall as his guide. His answer came when you, Sav, and Phil all heard him throw up into the sink. You sighed, resting your hands over your eyes, trying to remember the cause of Joe’s sickness, “Oh no, was that really my idea?” *** “Look what I found!” you trotted into the room tipsily, holding two bottles; one of scotch, one of vodka, “Only half full! Who wants em?” While you weren’t full-on drunk, it was no secret that the title wasn’t that far away. After your little Ballroom Blitz, it was one beer after the next, then it was digging into the fancy liquors that Phil and Joe had just brought home. Your judgment was impaired, no doubt about it, and so was the judgment of all the guys. Joe even changed into his normal live-show-only Union Jack tank top, claiming that he was gonna "put on a show." The only one who was still sane and sober was Phil, who seemed to be staying away from your poison. Upon registering your sacred offer of alcohol, Rick ran forward, chanting, “Me! Me!” You lifted the bottles away from him, commanding, “Uh-uh! I get the scotch.” “Oh, bollocks, then you can keep the vodka,” the young drummer grumbled and turned away from you. Just as Rick rejected your offering, Joe sprung up and eagerly trotted over while shouting happily, “I’ll take it!” “Sold!” you handed the bottle over to him, “Betcha can’t finish before me!” “Betcha I can!” he sneered back before taking the cap off his bottle. There was no official “ready, set, go” for the race; you both just kind of went for it without any saying. While your throat and stomach were already protesting your actions (and you could almost sense that Joe’s were doing the same), you didn’t stop once; neither of you did. You held up your bottle and announced, “Done!” Looking over, you saw Joe was also finished. “I finished first!” “Nuh-uh!” you insisted, “It had to be me! Tell him, guys!” The four others hadn’t been paying attention to you and Joe’s little competition; they were instead focused on a box that Sav had pulled out from a cupboard. From the box they pulled out bottles of paint and various types of used makeup.

Joe scolded them all in a more sober manner, “Oh come on, you lot weren’t even watching!” “Yeah, yeah, it was probably a tie, anyways,” Rick chuckled, pulling out more items from the box. “This box is much more interesting, too," Phil protested, holding up a stick of lipstick as Sav held up two bottles of paint, "This is a box of makeup that I had for me and the lads in Girl! Just look at it all! Think we can have some fun with this?" "Oh, piss off," you threw the empty bottle onto the couch, "We need some music." Joe had slumped down onto a chair, and you stumbled your way over to the shelf with all the records on it, flipping through and eyeing them all as carefully as your body would let you. After only a few seconds of searching, your eyes lit up at a discovery. "Here's a good one!" you exclaimed as you pulled out a copy of Hi Infidelityby REO Speedwagon, "Let's give it a spin!" ***

Joe wandered back into the room and fell onto the empty couch with a grumble. “Sorry, Joe...” you muttered over to him, realizing that you pressured him into more consumption of the booze. “It was probably gonna happen anyway...” he admitted, wiping his hands over his face, “It’s was my stupid choice to go through with it.” “Woah,” Phil pointed out out of nowhere, looking at you with great surprise, “What’s that on your neck?” You felt your heart drop into your stomach. “What!?” you shot up from where you sat (bringing on more dizziness), and rushed over to a mirror. Once your dizziness subsided, and you could finally see your reflection, the pink shape of a hickey on the side of your neck was now clearly conspicuous. You wondered how you hadn't noticed it before. Joe exclaimed with a smug and proud grin, “Is that from Steve!?” You groaned angrily, feeling yourself become more and more defeated. “I can’t believe it,” you gasped, slapping a hand over the mark, “Something did happen between us-!” “Y/N,” Phil pointed out again, “There’s lipstick on your thigh...” Looking down at your legs, you saw that he was right. There was a single red symbol on your right thigh that marked a kiss from the night before. Upon seeing this, what you saw when you woke up popped into your head. “Looks like Steve went to town down there,” Sav smirked at you, only wanting to rub it in more. “Guys,” you softly noted, “That wasn’t Steve... he has lipstick marks all over his face from someone else...” The three men all exchanged confused looks with each other. There was a dead end to the story of the previous night. None of them knew how to solve the mystery of the lipstick. Not even Phil, who was as good as sober 12 hours ago, didn’t have any input. Sav suddenly blurted out, “Wait a minute, I know what happened- I think...” No one said anything, but eagerly leaned forward, ready to hear the tale the bassist had to tell. “You lot remember how we found that box of old makeup last night?” he began, “Well, I walked into the bathroom with you afterwards, Y/N...” *** Rick looked at himself in the mirror in the bathroom, carefully applying the makeup to his lips, and being extra careful to not get it on the blazer he was wearing. The drummer put on his best suit just to see how it would look with the makeup he was putting on. He thought he was doing a good job for the most part; he didn’t look half bad at all! It was far easier than he expected it to be, and wondered if he was good enough to help you with your makeup at times. Thinking of you seemed to have made you appear in the doorway next to him. Both of your hands were still covered in paint. “Sink,” was all you commanded of the drummer. He moved without a word and you began to wash your hands. At the same instant, Sav appeared nearby. He grabbed the doorframe and began to swing from it, leaving conspicuous handprints afterwards. “Aren’t you gonna wash up, too?” Rick crossed his arms to sass him. “Nah, I want the colors, they’re makin’ me feel- colorful...” Sav grinned, walking over to you at the sink, requesting, “C’mere.” You looked up, only to have your face taken in Sav’s paint-covered hands. He softly giggled as you squared your vision in on him with a sneer. “Rude,” you teased, then went back to washing your hands; paint now all over your face. “What’s really rude,” Rick pulled back the shower curtain and taking a step into the tub, “Is you two interrupting my makeup time! Good night!” He sat himself down in the tub and laid himself down as if he was going to sleep.

Before he had the chance to catch some shut-eye, you marched over to the tub and objected, “Rick, if you’re gonna sleep, I want a goodnight kiss first.” Without another word, Rick sat up and planted a kiss on your thigh (since it was closest to him). There was now a bright red imprint of his lips on your leg. “Thank you.” you smiled down at him, “Now goodnight.” “Don’t leave the water on, you hear?” Sav nagged him, pointing a colored finger, “You’ll drown." Rick chuckled with his eyes closed, “I’ll drink myself out. I'm in a drinkin mood, anyways." “Oh yeah? You haven’t got a straw or anything,” the intoxicated bassist continued to argue with him. “Then don’t let me drown! Get one!" “I’ll get you one later. I’ll just-“ Sav burped, and continued, “I’ll write a note or something.” “Sounds good, mate,” Rick slumped further into the tub and pulled the curtain closed, “Now you gonna stay here all night?” “Actually,” you noted out loud to yourself, different alcoholic emotions boiling up inside you, “I wanna go downstairs- I just need to see Steve- like right now...!" You turned on your heels, speeding past Sav and flying back down the stairs. *** “So that explains the paint on my face, and the paper in the hallway, and the lipstick, but what happened after that?” you asked Sav, as you were now slumped on top of Phil’s arm again. “Beats me,” Sav ran his still-painted hands through his hair, “That’s all I’ve got.” “But wait, if you said that Rick fell asleep in the bathtub...” Phil began his sentence, only for you and the other two men to exchange knowing looks with each other. All four of you immediately sprung up and rushed (as much as you could) up the stairs and into the bathroom. Upon getting there, Phil flung back the shower curtain to reveal a partially awake Rick, dressed in a suit, and still wearing the lipstick from the night before. “Mornin’,” he groaned as he stretched, then winced, “Ah, fuck- sleeping in here wasn’t the best idea for me neck.” Sav looked back at the paint on the doorframe and asked the drummer, “So then why did you sleep in here?” “Oh,” Rick looked around the tub, stating as-a-matter-of-factly, “The porcelain keeps the suit from wrinkling. I guess drunk me was very careful last night.” “I’ll say,” Joe complemented, “The lipstick’s still holding up pretty well.” Phil halted the conversation, “Wait, so you were in here when I went to the bathroom in the middle of the night?” Rick chuckled, “Yeah, and let me tell you, for a smaller guy, you’ve got a big bladder.” “Wait,” you slowly turned and pointed at Joe, “I thought you said you slept in the bathtub-?” He gave you a cocky smirk in return, “I told you, ‘definitely not the bathtub’...” Rick sleepily laughed and pointed at you, “Ha- Y/N, you look like Joe!” “Why, just because of the shirt?” you inquired, pointing at Joe’s tank top on you. “And the paint!” Rick corrected you, “I can’t believe you guys didn’t wash it off yet!” In a second, you felt a rush of worry upon realizing that Rick hadn’t said anything about you and Steve yet. It made you suddenly come to the possible conclusion that he may not know about it all. “Wait,” Phil snapped his fingers, “So you do remember some stuff from last night?” “Yeah, a bit, I think. Why?” “Philip Kenneth Collen, don’t you fucking dare....” you growled at him in an almost pleading manner, rubbing your temples and grinding your teeth. “What do you remember?” Phil asked him, not giving any sort of reaction to your begging. Rick thought for a few seconds, clearly as hungover as the rest of you. It didn’t take him long to list off some brief happenings he recalled. “Well, I remember us singing Sweet, there was a lap dance, I remember- uh, being denied a bottle of scotch, there was, uh... there was lipstick... and did I try to ice-skate on pieces of cardboard down the hall...?” “Is that why there’s cardboard all down the hallway?” you motioned towards the door. Rick gave you a big proud smile and a nod in response. “So...” Joe looked around, definitely looking eager, “What’s the last thing you remember before falling asleep?” Rick rested his head back on the tub again, thinking as hard as his hungover mind would let him. You hoped to every god there was that he didn’t say anything about Steve. “Just Phil comin’ in here and having a long piss, that’s all.” came the verdict. “You sure you didn’t hear-“ Phil anxiously began to ask him, but got a hand slapped over his mouth by you. “No!” you yelled on impulse, sending more daggers through your burned-out head. All eyes were now on you, and silence fell. For a few tense seconds, you stared into Phil’s eyes, sending him visual messages of both threats and desperate requests. “...what the hell happened last night?” Rick broke the silence in a tone of utter confusion, knowing that something more serious than what he remembered had taken place. You pulled your hand back from Phil’s face, “Yuck, Phil, come on!” “You licked her hand, didn’t you?” asked Sav. “Yes,” Phil confirmed, and continued without missing a beat, “And I’m glad you asked that, Rick, cos' I know what happened after Y/N and Sav paid you a visit last night.” “Phil, if you love me in any way, shape, or form, you will not tell Rick what happened,” you begged to him as you began to walk out the bathroom door, heading back downstairs to wallow in more of your shameful hangover, “I refuse to believe it happened until there’s hard proof.” “Well what more proof do you want? A positive pregnancy test?” Phil shrugged, but suddenly slapped his own hand over his mouth, realizing what he’d just said. You shot him an angry look. You were too tired to have it out with him, so you stumbled away. Right about now, you were ready to give up and accept the fact that you probably did shag Steve. Phil turned to Rick, gaping, and slowly began to speak again, "Right... so last night, after those two were in here, I think that’s when they came back downstairs..." *** "So why are you tying up my hair again?" a drunk Steve asked Phil, who was happily putting his hair into pigtails. "Because I knew you’d look pretty, and I knew you wouldn't object, either," the other guitarist laughed evilly as he finished tying the second bundle of golden locks together, "There, you're all done now." "Cool... I think," Steve tilted his head, staring at himself in the mirror on the wall as footsteps began pounding their way down the stairs. "I think you look pretty, Steve. Pretty, pretty, pretty," Joe giggled as he was flipped off by the pig-tailed guitarist. As this happened, you trampled the stairs in your descent, calling out, “Steve- Steve! Come here!” More than happy to be ripped away from Phil’s pigtailed plans, he let you run up to him as you belted out, “I’ve got an idea...!” He didn’t say anything, but he did let you whisper something in his ear. The second he heard your idea, his eyes lit up and an evil smirk crossed his face. Steve was always in the mood for causing terror. You pulled back and exchanged the same look of understanding with the guitarist. He stared at you with a sort of appreciation, and without another word, swept you off your feet, carrying you bridal style now. With a quick smooch to your lips, he began carrying you up the stairs as you giggled with some sort of glee. Phil’s jaw dropped, looking at Joe with astonishment in the process. The singer’s face mirrored the exact same expression. “I should’ve bloody known...” Phil gasped in astonishment, “She’s been eyeing him up real funny all night... I can’t fucking believe it!” Sav came down the stairs slowly, his life depending on the railing as he dragged his hand on it. He left a long streak of blue paint as he did so. “What’s gotten into their pants?” “Each other, apparently,” Joe scoffed, taking a sip of a beer he found, “Lord knows how the hell that happened.” *** You were all sitting back on the couches in the living room, all seemingly regretting the night before (you knew you most certainly were). Everyone knew that the end of Phil’s story was the true ending of the night. Now there was really a dead end to the whole tale. “I can’t believe it,” you whispered with sorrowful acceptance, “Me and Steve...? What happened next?” Joe scoffed, “Well that’s kind of a stupid question.” “That’s where it ends, Y/N. I went up to bed afterwards, only to hear-“ Phil cleared his throat to impersonate you and Steve, “‘Oh, Steve! Yes!’ coming from my room! So after an immense helping of disapproval, I slept in Rick’s room.” “No, no, that can’t be it!” you insisted, “Guys, what really happened next?” “Can’t say,” Joe mumbled, holding his head. “Sorry, mate,” Rick apologized. Sav remained silent, but looked apologetic. “That can’t be where it ends...!” you persisted, “Sav? Tell me I’m right!” Sav rolled in his lips, and darted his eyes away from you. You continued to stare at him suspiciously, but no one else thought anything of it. Phil tried to finalize your fate sympathetically, “Give it up, Y/N, at least it’s all over now.” “But it still happened! What am I gonna say to Steve when he wakes up? You know what- no. It didn’t happen, I refuse to believe that it did.” “How much more proof do you want?” Rick shrugged, pointing at Phil and Sav, trying to make you face the terrible truth, “They both heard ya, and Steve even gave you a hickey.” You hung your head, thinking you might just decide to cry out of shame. Yes, you loved Steve, just as you loved anyone else in the band, but you never had (or planned to have) any sort of sexual relationship with them. Even if you ever did, you were afraid it would ruin everything your friendship had stood for. “Sav, what’s wrong, mate?” Joe asked out of the blue. The bassist in question was still avoiding the conversation, staying eerily silent and weaving his hands together. At this point, you noticed that he was also blushing. “That wasn’t Steve.” he stated bluntly, still not looking at you. “What wasn’t Steve?” you asked as you stared at him dead on, your heart now pounding. “That hickey... that wasn’t Steve,” he paused, “That was me.” Immediately you gasped and slapped a hand over the mark on your neck. “What?!” the other three exclaimed. Joe and Rick immediately hissed at the searing pain their outbursts caused. “Sav, what the hell?!” you scolded him, finally happy that you weren’t the only one being called out for their mistakes. “Now before you say anything else,” he finally looked at you and held up a hand, “It was your idea.” Your face fell, softly asking him, “What do you mean?” “Well, after you and Steve-you know- and only Joe and I were downstairs, you actually came back down, too- wipe that smug look off your face, Joe. You’re not entirely innocent here, either.” *** You stumbled down the stairs, giggling to yourself. Your mission was now accomplished, and Steve was asleep upstairs. In a word, you were pleased. In two words, you were still drunk. Records were still being played when you returned to the living room, and Joe currently had his copy of Sheer Heart Attack on the turntable. “She Makes Me (Stormtrooper In Stilettos)”flowed softly from its speakers. “There’s our killer queen!” Joe cooed to you happily. He was now sprawled out on the couch, two empty beer bottles on the floor beside him. Sav wasn’t too far off. The paints on his hands were now dry, and he was reclined in a chair across the room, twiddling a bottle in his hand. They both looked ready for bed, and it made you wonder how they held out for this long. The singer slurred on with an interested smirk, “You two have fun?" Sav spoke up with a scoff-like laugh, “Sure sounded like it!" “Oh, you know it,” you gave them a wink, setting yourself down on the couch next to Joe, “Guess Phil finally ditched, huh?” “Yeah, the wanker went to bed- but you’ve lost your pants!” he gestured to your black underwear, made room for you to lay down with him, and took you in his arms like a teddy bear with a sigh of appeasement. You reached back and playfully poked at Joe’s dimple, “Steve's fault." “Well, that’s no good,” Sav objected, pushing the footrest of the chair in and returning to a sitting position. “What isn’t?” Joe asked him, "Steve gettin' into it with her?" “No, that cuddlin' you're doing- it’s boring. You stay like that, you’ll fall asleep on me!” He was certainly right about this. With you in Joe’s arms and his face nuzzling into your hair like some sort of animal, he was already falling asleep. “What do you want us to do?” you chuckled, thinking that Sav was only jealous of his friend. Joe mumbled happily into your hair, “How 'bout you just do me like Steve, and we’ll be good.” At this point, you noticed the feeling of something pressing lightly against the bottom of your back; a certain weight where Joe’s hips were, and a weight that wasn’t there at first. “Joe,” you whined at him, “You’re fucking gross.” He chuckled, then slowly moved his hips to lightly rub himself against you, a low quiet moan rising in his throat from the temporary pleasure it provided. “Ah- Joe!” you protested again, reaching back and hitting him as best as you could. You wiggled out of his embrace as he burst into giggles like he had just accomplished something. Sav, on the other hand, cringed and pinched the bridge of his nose. “You’re even hornier than when you’re sober!” you grabbed a pillow and whacked Joe with it. “You’re one to talk! You just shagged Steve!” he smirked evilly, "Why not me?" “Ha! The only way I’ll do you is by some miracle, or at least a dare,” you threw yourself onto the other couch, picking up a nearly empty beer bottle and pouring whatever was left into your mouth. Sav’s eyes finally lit up, “That’s what we oughta do- truth or dare!” “Ooh, sounds like terrible fun,” you turned yourself so you were sitting upside-down on the couch, “Sav, truth or dare?” “How come he gets to go first?” asked Joe, “I wanna get down to business!” “Dare,” Sav declared, ignoring the singer’s objections. Immediately, your intoxicated mind thought of a scheme. Despite the plan you and Steve had executed ever so perfectly, you were still a child seeking more terror. You knew Joe wanted you, and it was no secret either, so how exactly would you use Sav to reign terror over him? You wanted something to rub in Joe’s face- something that would leave a mark on him. “I dare you to-" you clumsily pointed to your neck, "Gimme a hickey.” Joe's jaw dropped with offense and jealousy; exactly as you had expected. Sav began to laugh rather loudly at the request, and stood up, now understanding your true intention of making Joe jealous. “C’mere,” he motioned with his hand. More than happy to obey the command, you strutted over to him and paused, waiting for him to make the first move. He took a step so your bodies were practically pressing together, moved your hair out of the way on your neck, and dove right in. You smiled with glee, taking in the feeling of Sav’s mouth and tongue moving over your skin (as well as Joe’s groans of protest coming from a few feet away). As the bassist sucked on your neck without hesitation, it only made you think of one thing: “Wow, there’s definitely gonna be a mark after this.” *** Rick and Phil were staring at Sav with their mouths open in shock. You kept a hand over the mark he left on your neck to prevent everyone from looking any more than they already had. “So, wait, if it was you who gave me this, why didn’t you say anything before when we said it was Steve?” you asked Sav, more suspicious than outraged now. “I- ah, didn’t... wanna say anything...” he looked away, beginning to blush again, “I guess I was too embarrassed." “I think the only person who should be embarrassed is you, Joe,” Rick turned his attention back to the singer, “You fuckin dry humped her!” Joe exclaimed in his own defense, “Yeah, and I don’t even remember it! It’s not my fault- I was drunk and horny!” “See! Just like me and Steve! I don’t remember shagging him, either! So I guess we’re even.” “Even Stephen,” Phil scoffed. You slumped into the couch more, staring blankly ahead and realizing, “So I pretty much got to second base with all of you last night...?” “I think you made it all the way home with Steve,” Rick pointed out. “Thanks, Rick,” you kept your head hung, “I feel like a slut.” “You mean you’re not?” Phil joked, only to be hit in the arm by Sav.

Just then, you all heard the sound of movement upstairs. Your heart stopped and your blood ran cold; Steve was awake now. Everyone's jaws hit the floor, and for a second, you thought they were all afraid of what you were fearing. "He's awake..." Rick announced in a sing-song voice, teasing you. “Oh no...” you gasped quietly, “Oh no, oh no! Oh god, what am I gonna do? What am I gonna say to him?!” “Hate to break it to ya, but this isn’t necessarily our problem!” Joe shrugged in a panic, hearing Steve’s footsteps get closer. “But guys! You’ve gotta help me! You’re his best friends! What should I say to him?!” “Just act like it didn’t happen! Maybe he doesn’t remember-?” Sav proposed. Rick suggested, “Just straight up ask him if he remembers anything!” “Just get out of here!” Phil made a swatting motion towards the other room. “None of those are gonna do me any good! It still happened!” you yelled at them in a whisper, “I have to live that with that fact, even if neither of us have any memory of it to live with!” It was too late for any salvation; Steve was already at the top of the stairs. The band members held their breath, and- without words or warning- all scrambled out of the living room. “No!” you whispered, “Guys- wait!” You caught Rick by the wrist when he stood up. “Rick, c’mon, please don’t leave me here!” you begged. He yanked out of your grip and apologetically condemned you, “Sorry, Y/N, but this is your business.” As the four of them retreated, you tried to bolt after them. As soon as you hit the doorway, however, Phil turned around and pushed you back on the couch nearby as slowly as he could. It was so sudden that you were on your back before you knew it, and they were all gone. “Hey!” you called out after them, “Assholes!” Steve’s voice suddenly came to your ears (rather closely, too), “What’s their problem?” You jumped, “Ah- Steve!” He had a silent step, and made it down the stairs and across the room without making a sound. He also looked just as he did a little while ago when you first woke up; scraggly hair, lipstick stains all over his face, but no visible evidence of a hangover. “Hey, wow,” you forced an awkward chuckle at him, “Nice- uh, nice- lipstick...” Steve slumped down onto a chair and grumbled, “Thanks. Who even did this to me? Doesn’t look like it was you.” “That was, that was Rick- I’m assuming... I don’t remember that happening and I don’t think he does, either. He’s still got the lipstick on, too.” He played off the remark with a tired smile, “Oh, nice... last night really was something, wasn’t it?” Heat rushed to your face, and you tried to look away without being conspicuous. “Ha ha... yeah... really something!” you faked your amusement for him, now wondering if he was implying anything about the previous night. Steve leaned forward and asked, “Do you remember Sav and the paint? That was pretty funny, wasn’t it?” Still blushing, you darted your eyes around the room and nodded in agreement, “Mm hmm, yeah... he was like a toddler or something.” He sunk back into the chair again and closed his eyes, reminiscing about the events of the previous night. For a second you thought you were in the clear, and that maybe he didn’t remember the specific event that Phil and Sav did.

That illusion was shattered when his eyes snapped open, whispering “Wait a minute”, and sitting back up. Immediately, your heart dropped into your stomach.

“How did our plan go?” he questioned quietly, figuring that the others were still somewhere nearby and listening. “P-plan?” you stuttered, partially afraid of what he meant, but partially caught off guard, “What plan?” “You know-” he whispered again, thinking you remembered, “It was your idea. Did they believe it? We were convincing enough?" You darted your eyes down to the floor, confused, but also embarrassed. 'Convincing'? What did that mean? "Oh come on, don’t tell me you don’t remember!” he smiled playfully. As you stared at him with fearful confusion in your eyes and redness on your cheeks, his smile was suddenly wiped away. He muttered under his breath as his face fell, "Oh... you don't remember... bloody hell, okay, this is gonna be hard to explain..." "Then explain it, because I'm really fucking confused..." your voice wavered with a sarcastic chuckle. Steve sighed and leaned forward, slowly weaving his hands together. He didn't know where to begin. "This is one of the few things I remember from last night..." he started off, "And there's no way to make this sound... good... in any way, but you came up with the idea of us pretending to shag- like making noises and shit like that- to trick the others into thinking we really did. For some reason I thought it was a great idea, and I'm pretty sure I carried you upstairs, too.” Instantly, a huge weight was lifted off your shoulders. It wasn't real; you didn't shag Steve, and he could even tell the guys himself! You blew out a big sigh of relief, and slumped back into the couch, closing your eyes. "Oh, god," you slowly panted, "What a huge relief- I suppose we were really convincing, then." "Why d'you say that?" You laughed tiredly, now feeling rather thankful for your raging hangover, "The guys are all convinced that we fucked last night. Only Phil and Sav seem to remember it, though. They've been hounding me about it all morning. I kept telling them it couldn't be true- and I was right!" "What, would it be so bad if we actually did?" he teased you in a hushed voice. "Well, I've had to live my day so far under the impression it did happen. I was teased, ridiculed, embarrassed, and felt guilty about it. I was afraid it'd ruin our friendship if it was true... I was kinda hoping you didn't remember so we could just forget..." The red in your face returned all over again. Steve, however, didn't seem bothered. "If you really want to, we can keep pretending it happened and steer into the act; give em' what they want." "What? No!" you laughed out loud, standing up, "You're crazy, Clark! I think I better go tell the others the bad news. They'll be disappointed-ha!" You walked across the room to go find the others and disclose unto them the "bad news", giving Steve a pat on the shoulder when you passed him. Once you were gone and out of sight, Steve also blew out a big sigh of relief. "She didn't remember anything," he thought to himself, "That was a close one." While he knew you two didn't go all the way the previous night, he figured if you didn't remember it, then it was for the best you didn't find out. It was nothing serious; just a bit of fooling around, really. Just a bit of drunked-up teasing, and nothing more. The guys had no proof that anything actually happened between you two, and you were about to tell them the partial truth anyway, so why say something to reignite the suspicion? After all, they were all hungover to begin with, so there wasn't much memory of the whole affair, either. "Thank god for these hangovers,"Steve thought, "Thank god. I couldnt've asked for anything more." ~Epilogue~ When you got to the top of the stairs, Steve put you on your feet and spun you around. "You ready?" he whispered, childish excitement in his voice. You nodded with equal excitement, "Take me away, Clark." The two of you began eagerly walking hand-in-hand to whatever room you pleased, but before either of you had the chance to pick one, the bathroom door opened, Rick popped his head out and commanded, "Stop right there!" Both you and Steve froze and looked at him. He still had his lipstick and his suit on, and a kind of serious look overtaking his face. A finger was kept in a pointing position at you, a few large pieces of cardboard were underneath his other arm, and he slowly took steps down the hall to meet you. Neither of you moved, but both of you waited. When Rick got to you, he didn't say a word, but did take Steve's face in his hands (dropping the cardboard in the process), and proceeded to the kiss the man all over his face.

Steve remained silent, and let Rick have his way until he decided to stop. When he did, there were several lipstick stains on various parts of the blonde's face.

"Thanks, mate," Steve muttered sarcastically as Rick kicked some of the cardboard pieces in different directions. He then stepped on two of them, trying to slide down the hall on them as if they were ice skates. When he got back to the bathroom, he went back inside and shut the door again.

Without another word, you turned Steve's face toward you, gave him a peck on the cheek as Rick had done, and kicked open the door behind you (which just so happened to be Phil's bedroom). You both fell back into the room, giggling with makeshift lust in your eyes.

After all, you had to make this authentic, right?

Oneshot #1: BillDarcy (Soulmate AU)

Description: A soulmate AU where the first words your soulmate will say to you appear on your skin when you reach the age of 16. It's BillDarcy in the canon era. Slightly angsty but also sweet with a happy ending.

words: 3411

A/N: Am I procrastinating because I should write so many other things? Maybe. Do I regret anything? Maybe but in my defense, I feel like there is a lack of BillDarcy fanfics and I really need to improve my English skills, so... that's a semi-good reason for writing this. It would be nice if you left a comment (maybe also on grammar/spelling mistakes).

I hope you enjoy (because strangely, I don't think that it's that bad).

Sincerely, me,

Lélodie

-----

The softly swaying music was the only thing that kept Darcy sane in this stuffy room. Some people were crowded on the dance floor, dancing intimately close with their partners, whereas others stood around in their fancy suits and dresses, behaving as if they were the most important individuals on earth.

Darcy sighed and held on tighter to his glass of sprinkling water, searching for something to get his mind off the fact that everything here was fake. In the beginning, he hadn't exactly been opposed to the idea of accompanying his father to this big event that was hosted by William Randolph Hearst. But he had soon realised that he literally felt trapped in between all these people. He wanted nothing more than to return to his bedroom and continue to read the latest book he had gotten his hands on. An interesting piece of literature, written by Victor Hugo.

He searched for his father in the crowd, soon finding him being in an animated conversation with another newspaper owner whose name he had forgotten. For a small moment, his father glanced back at him and as if he could read his son's thoughts, he threw him an ominous look. As if to say: “You are staying right where you are, young man.”

Darcy answered with a cautious nod and turned away. That was when he saw him. In a small corner, right next to an open window, stood a boy, who seemed to be as young as himself, staring at the floor and looking obviously out of place. His suit seemed to be too big for his slim body, his short brown hair was drenched in sweat because of the heat and his eyes that appeared quite lively on the one hand, signalised exhaustion on the other hand. Darcy couldn't describe why, but he felt like something in him was dying to get to know this boy. With a last look in his father's direction and a sip from his water, he made up his mind.

It was difficult, getting to the corner where the boy stood. Everywhere were bodies, dancing, standing, swaying, and the general atmosphere made it hard for Darcy to take a breath. But eventually, he ended up beside the boy, who eyed him curiously. Then, he raised his eyebrows, an unspoken question as to why Darcy had come over to him.

“You're looking pretty miserable over here,” Darcy explained, fiddling with the brim of his glass.

The other boy snorted and replied in the most sarcastic tone he could come up with. “Oh, quite the opposite, I actually enjoy being around presumptuous people who hide themselves behind a facade.”

Once again, Darcy wasn't able to breathe but this time for an entirely different reason. He had expected everything but not that. When he was younger, his mother had always told him stories about soulmates. Two people that were so perfect for each other that the universe graced their skin with the first words one would say to the other so that they would be able to recognize the right person when they met them. The words usually appeared when one turned sixteen. The days before Darcy's sixteenth birthday had been torture. He had realised at a very young age that he wasn't able to look at girls the way he was supposed to and he couldn't feel anything but shame and fear. A tiny part of himself had hoped that his soulmate would be a girl and he had simply been confused.

But no. The words that he had memorised ever since he had seen them for the first time had just been spoken. By the boy right in front of him. Who was now looking at him with concern in his eyes. Why was he looking concerned? Why wasn't there recognition in his gaze? Didn't he have Darcy's words as well? Had he just not registered them?

Still a bit stunned, Darcy cleared his throat. “That was really the first thing that came to your mind?”

Now it was the other boy's turn to be confused. “Why? Is there something wrong with what I said?”

“No, no, it's not that,” Darcy assured him quickly. “It just...” Think, Darcy, think. In his head, he cursed his brain for not being able to form coherent thoughts any more. “It just makes me glad I approached you.” He was quite satisfied with this spontaneous explanation because the other boy flashed him a smile that made him feel things he never had experienced before.

“Thank you for the compliment. You are the son of mister Reid, aren't you?”

Darcy nodded and stretched out the hand that wasn't still holding his glass. “Yes. My name is Darcy. And you are?”

“I'm Bill. The unfortunate son of today's host,” Bill introduced himself and shook Darcy's hand.

“Nice to meet you, Bill.” His skin was very soft, Darcy noticed, yet he couldn't help but see faint traces of ink on his fingertips. It made him smirk. Bill's hand was perfect. And it was being pulled away by its owner far too soon. For a moment, the two boys just stood next to each other, observing the room and the people in it. Upon realising that every person in this room, except for Bill, was kind of old, Darcy had an idea. “You appear to be the same age as I am. Are you sixteen as well?”

Bill shook his head. “No. I turned fifteen, two months ago. My mother always tells me that I look older than I am though.”

Darcy hoped that his relief wasn't too obvious. So this whole soulmate thing was not necessarily one-sided, at least regarding the role of the universe. But after this short moment of relief, reality came crashing down on him. Even if Darcy's words appeared on Bill's skin on his sixteenth birthday, that didn't mean that Bill wanted to be with Darcy. Homosexuals were very despised within society and he hadn't ever heard of a same-sex soulmate couple that was openly together. Or maybe that wouldn't bother Bill but he still wouldn't be attracted to Darcy. Was Darcy even attracted to Bill?

At the end of the evening, Darcy completely dismissed the last question. How could he not be attracted to Bill? Bill, who had asked him if he wanted to leave the party to show him his father's printing press, after Darcy mentioned his interest in printing. Bill, who had been so gently when he had adjusted Darcy's spectacles. Bill, whose eyes were big and glistening with joy when he talked about things he loved.

It was like Darcy was falling without having planned to jump.

*

The stars in the sky were especially shiny that night, or maybe that was just Darcy's imagination. He was staring out of the window of Bill's bedroom, sitting on the spare bed and awaiting the moment the clock would strike twelve. Part of him was curious. He wanted to know if Bill would really have his words on his skin. You're looking pretty miserable over here. In addition to Bill's words on his chest, he had his own memorised, repeating them over and over like a prayer.

The other part was afraid. His mind was being flooded with the same questions he had asked himself nearly a whole year long. After the party where they had met each other, Bill and Darcy had started to hang out more and more, sometimes even with Katherine Pulitzer, a childhood friend of Bill's. They had never talked about this whole soulmate topic, at least not when it was just the two of them. Katherine had told them her words at one point but that was it. Darcy had noticed Bill's curious look in his direction when Katherine had asked him if he wanted to share his words. But Darcy had only made a dismissive hand gesture and started to talk about the latest news.

He didn't know what to expect. The only thing he knew was that his body was aching, aching for something that he just couldn't put his finger on.

Suddenly, the room was filled with the faraway sound of ringing bells. It was twelve o'clock. Darcy hadn't gone to sleep the night before his own sixteenth birthday, so he remembered clearly how he had been hugging his knees in anticipation. The abrupt pain in his chest as the universe drew words on his body, his skin, right above his heart. He had wanted to cry. He had known that he wouldn't be able to read with tears in his eyes, however, so he had gripped tight onto the edge of his bed, waiting for the pain to subside. Then, he had run towards his mirror, a flickering candle in his hand, and had nearly ripped off his shirt.

His memories were interrupted by Bill's cry. The other boy had been fast asleep for at least one hour, so Darcy had thought that maybe, just maybe, he wouldn't be able to feel the pain. Alarmed, he turned his head in the direction of Bill's bed and saw that his best friend was clutching his chest, still half asleep and panting.

“Bill,” Darcy called out, softly, so that he wouldn't wake up Bill's parents. Bill didn't respond. Instead, he was blindly searching for something to hold on to. The blanket, then the bedsheets. “Bill.” As fast as he could, Darcy left the spare bed and ran over towards Bill. Bill, his soulmate who was in pain and whom he couldn't help. “Bill, sh, it's alright, I'm here. It's going to be alright.” Bill's wandering hands were suddenly in reach, so Darcy took them between his own, tenderly, as if Bill was made of glass.

Still gasping for air, Bill seemed to be able to take in his surroundings now. Through half closed eyes, he looked at Darcy, trying to process what he was saying, while holding onto his hands like a lifeline. “Darcy, it hurts, why does it hurt?”

Now, that was a good question. In every story his mother had ever told him about soulmates, she had never once mentioned the pain that came with getting your words. He had felt betrayed and he had told her so afterwards. But she had just hugged him with an encouraging smile and mumbled something along the lines of: “Nobody wants to remember the downsides of the beautiful things.”

“I know. I know that it hurts, but don't worry, Bill. It will stop eventually. I'm here. I'm with you,” Darcy whispered, softly drawing patterns on Bill's palms.

“You won't leave, will you?” A sob escaped Bill's lips and Darcy wondered if the pain was different for everyone. His own chest began to hurt upon seeing Bill like this.

“I won't leave. I promise.” Carefully, he put his arms around Bill, holding him as close as he could, showing him that he wouldn't go away that easily. He could feel Bill trying to hold him tighter but the tiredness and the pain had taken away the strength of his arms.

For a long time, the room was filled with sobs and affectionate words. The sound of the bells was long gone and the intensity of the stars only an obligatory background.

The next morning, Darcy was awoken by Bill's shuffling. He distantly remembered falling asleep in each other's arms, with their legs tangled under the blanket but in retrospect this might've just been a part of a sweet dream. The bed was creaking and he could feel Bill standing up. Muffled sounds escaped Darcy's mouth. He was nevertheless too sleepy to open his eyes. He could hear steps. Fabric being moved. A gasp.

“Everything alright?” Was the only thing he was able to say in his condition. He wondered if being hungover felt like this. It took him some time, but that didn't matter since Bill wasn't responding anyways, before he finally could open his eyes. Only to see the other boy standing in front of his mirror, shirtless, examining a little thread of ink on his skin. He tried hard not to stare. Then it hit him. “You got your words.”

Bill turned away from the mirror, in his direction, and smiled. “You're looking pretty miserable over here,” he recited. “What do you think? Am I gonna meet them when I am coming out of a fight? Maybe I will join a revolution and a time will come when I don't succeed but then I meet them and everything turns out to end good,” Bill speculated, like the dramatic boy he was. Always dreaming about defying laws and doing something great.

It took Darcy embarrassingly long to register that the words on Bill's skin were his own. It took him even longer to realise that Bill had no clue that he had already heard these words before. For a moment, a short little moment that could easily be missed, he contemplated telling him. But he couldn't. Not when Bill started to go on and on about some fictional soulmate, already planning out their lives together. Some fictional soulmate. Some soulmate that wasn't Darcy.

Maybe Darcy should at least tell Bill that he shouldn't get his hopes up. That he shouldn't go through the streets, thinking that he will meet his soulmate. That he should instead go and find a pretty girl to settle down with. But he didn't.

Instead, he just stood up, wished Bill a happy birthday and pretended to be as invested in Bill's soulmate scenarios as the boy himself was.

*

A cool wind was blowing through the streets but that didn't bother Darcy. He was just content with walking an overjoyed Bill home. It was an easy concept. After being persuaded by both Katherine and Bill, all three of them had joined the newsboy's cause and helped typesetting and printing an article to get the working kids of New York to unite. Bill was convinced that he was finally part of a big rebellion, so he nearly began floating with delight. And when Bill was extraordinarily happy, he became the most beautiful person on earth. Walking side by side with the most beautiful person on earth was making Darcy the luckiest boy on earth. So some tiny, chilly breeze became nothing to him.

Right now, Bill was talking about the commitment Katherine had shown and how surprised he had been when she had told him that the strike leader himself, Jack Kelly, was her soulmate. “Wouldn't it be nice, being part of a revolution alongside your soulmate?”

Darcy snorted. “I suppose.”

Bill threw him a strange look. The last few days, he often wore this exact same look and it drove Darcy crazy because he didn't know what it meant. Suddenly, Bill slowed down his steps. He hadn't exactly talked loud before, considering the fact that they were walking through the city while most of the people were asleep in their beds, but nonetheless he began to decrease his volume. “Say, Darcy, do you remember what we saw before we left the building?”

Darcy's heart stopped beating for a moment. Of course he remembered. It had shocked him to see two boys kissing openly in front of so many people but then the shock had turned into jealousy. How badly he wanted to do the same. Kissing the person he loved. But these were newsies. They lived after their own rules, as long as nobody got hurt. They may have been treated badly by life but they could be who they are. He wasn't a newsie. He wasn't allowed to follow his heart's desire. “Why do you ask?”

“Well, I was wondering, you know... If two boys could be each other's soulmates,” Bill stated. His hands, that had been hanging by his sides, were now fiddling with the hem of his shirt. Darcy wanted nothing more than to reach out to them.

Why couldn't Bill stop with this whole soulmate talk? And since when was he so interested in same-sex soulmates? Suddenly, Darcy felt nervousness crawling up his skin. Did Bill suspect that Darcy wasn't interested in girls? “I... How would I know?” He stuttered out.

Silence. Then, without a warning, Bill grabbed his hand and led him into the nearest alley, away from the lights of the street lamps. The smell in this alley wasn't exactly pleasant but Darcy had other problems than his stinky environment. Bill was close. So close. And he hadn't let go of his hand.

“Darcy, look, I desperately hope that I am not wrong but if I am, let's just forget about this whole thing, alright?” Bill's words didn't make any sense to him. However, he nodded, if only to learn what was going on with the other boy all of a sudden. “The party where we first met. How did you think I looked?”

You're looking pretty miserable over here. He remembered. Bill remembered, didn't he? Beads of sweat were tickling Darcy's forehead now as he contemplated his options. He could name a random adjective or act like he didn't know what Bill meant. Or he could be honest and finally get his rejection. But why would Bill be so keen on rejecting him? I desperately hope that I am not wrong. All this time, Darcy had thought that he understood Bill pretty well, but now he wasn't so sure any more. “You were looking pretty miserable,” he breathed out. His heart was beating faster than ever and he distantly registered that his hand was still in Bill's. Bill's wonderful hand that was so often decorated by ink stains.

“Thank God.” It seemed like Bill let out a breath he had not known he was holding. And then, he pressed his lips to Darcy's.

Darcy's brain short-circuited. What was even happening? Was he dreaming? No, he couldn't be dreaming. In his dreams, his kisses with Bill were always perfect. But in reality, neither of them had ever kissed someone before, so it was an awkward touch – lips to lips, with a little too much saliva. Darcy pulled back in bewilderment. “What do – But you didn't remember – What was that?”

Bill let out a shy laugh. “I know I didn't even consider the possibility that someone had already said my words when I first got them. But the longer I thought about some fictional person I realised that I didn't really want them. There was only one person on my mind and I couldn't get rid of all these thoughts about you and then I remembered our first meeting. I knew I said something to you about these presumptuous people but I couldn't remember your words. Context, hope and Katherine were what led me to at least hope that you could be my soulmate. And I just had to know if I was right.” He made a face like he was thinking about something. “Why hadn't you told me before?”

“I didn't want to scare you away. And you were so happy with your idea of an ideal soulmate. An ideal soulmate that wasn't me.”

“I am so sorry, love. It wasn't my intention to make you feel this way. But you have to know that there is no ideal soulmate. There is just you. You and me. From now on.” Bill used the hand that wasn't holding Darcy's to stroke Darcy's cheekbone, trying to not knock the spectacles from his face. “If you'll have me.”

Darcy couldn't help but smile at being called love by Bill of all people. “Of course I'll have you. But... what about everything else? Our parents? The rest of society? I want to make this happen, I promise, but I have to remind you that the position we're in is not exactly an optimal one.”

“I know. I know and we can think of something tomorrow. Or the day after tomorrow, I mean, we may be a little busy with joining a revolution. But please, please let us be only us for a moment.”

Darcy didn't even have to think this time. He nodded, feeling tears of relief forming behind his eyelids. Then, he took a deep breath and decided to lift a weight off of his chest. “We are soulmates, Bill.” It felt indefinitely good to say it out loud.

“Yes, we are, love.” Bill had never looked more beautiful to Darcy than in this moment.

HERE’S WHAT YOU MISSED THIS WEEK (2.19-2.25.20):

NEW MUSIC:

·         Frank Iero and the Future Violents released a new video for their song “Basement Eyes.” Almost a year after the release of their long-awaited album Barriers, Iero took to social media to tease the arrival of the video on February 17th.

·         The 1975 shared a new song and video for “The Birthday Party,” the fifth new track from their upcoming album Notes on a Conditional Form. Recently, the band also seemed to be behind a new website known as mindshower.ai.

·         All Time Low dropped their second single and video from their upcoming album Wake Up, Sunshine, titled “Sleeping In.” The band partnered with North Shore Animal League America (NSALA) to help raise money and awareness for no kill rescue and adoption organizations.

·         Ozzy Osbourne and Post Malone dropped their second collaboration from Osbourne’s album Ordinary Man, titled “It’s a Raid.” Fans first learned about the second collab earlier this month when the tracklist for the album was revealed.

·         5 Seconds of Summer dropped a new single, “Old Me,” off their upcoming LP C A L M. Earlier this month, the band dropped “No Shame” and announced the release date for their upcoming record.

·         Dance Gavin Dance announced the release of their ninth full-length studio album titled Afterburner. The band also celebrated by dropping the first single and video titled “Prisoner.”

·         Knuckle Puck dropped an energetic new track, “Tune You Out,” which is also their first release in nearly two years. According to Kerrang!, the band recently finished recording their third full-length album.

·         Ashley Purdy recently dropped a third solo track following his departure from Black Veil Brides in November. The song is titled “King for a Day,” which serves as the full track from a teaser Purdy posted back in December.

·         Fall Out Boy musicians Patrick Stump and Joe Trohman and Dethklok mastermind Brendon Small partnered up on the song “New Music Sucks.” The track comes off of Posehn’s comedy metal record Grandpa Metal.

·         Craig Owens of D.R.U.G.S., among many other dissolved acts, made a brief anniversary post for the band’s sole self-titled record. This follows an Instagram account for the band that was made and a VK page that leaked info about a potential single release date. 

TOUR ANNOUNCEMENTS:

·         Foo Fighters announced a 25th Anniversary “Van Tour,” which will visit 10 different cities. The tour is special because they plan to revisit some stops they hit on their 1995 tour to promote their debut album.

·         The Glasgow, Scotland, date of Palaye Royale’s The Bastards European Tour at the Garage was canceled, with the band later performing a free acoustic show near the venue. Days later, the band announced their show in Birmingham, England, was also canceled.

·         Movements announced a spring tour, which will commence on April 23rd in San Diego and conclude on May 17th in El Paso, Texas. They will be joined by fellow hardcore groups Teenage Wrist and Queen of Jeans. 

·         After rescheduling some of their tour dates back in January for the second leg of their winter tour, Angels & Airwaves announced new dates for those shows, as well as some extra shows. They will take place around a handful of festival dates, including Bunbury Festival. 

·         In celebration of their 10-year anniversary tour for the record To Plant a Seed in a few weeks, We Came As Romans revealed exclusive tour merch designs. The band took to Twitter to reveal three exclusive t-shirt designs designed by bassist Andy Glass.

·         Dropkick Murphys and Rancid announced that they are teaming up for a spring tour, the Boston to Berkeley II Tour. The tour begins May 3rd in Concord, North Carolina, and ends May 24th in Lewiston, New York.

·         Vans Warped Tour founder Kevin Lyman took to social media to ask fans for their input on a potential Warped Rewind at Sea sequel. The tour searched for suggestions on what other kind of entertainment and activities would make the trip better. 

·         Alesana announced a 10-city tour to celebrate the 10th anniversary of their release, The Emptiness. The tour commences on April 24th in North Carolina before ending on May 3th in Austin, Texas.

·         Armor for Sleep confirmed reunion theories with the announcement of a 15-year anniversary tour for their sophomore album What to Do When You Are Dead. The band broke up initially back in 2009.

OTHER NEWS:

·        Bring Me the Horizon dressed up as famous pop girl group The Spice Girls at the BRIT Awards on February 18th. The band all wore the personas of Scary, Posh, Baby, Sporty and Ginger Spice from their iconic performance at the 1997 BRIT Awards.

·         The Umbrella Academy teased viewers with a first look at the upcoming season, dropping the first set of posters for the second season of the series. The series is based on My Chemical Romance frontman Gerard Way‘s comic book of the same name.

·         The 320 Project started by Warped Tour founder Kevin Lyman and 320 Changes Direction founder Talinda Bennington, who was married to the late Chester Bennington of Linkin Park, was announced. The event will take place at the USC Bovard Auditorium.

·         The late Lil Peep’s estate partnered with luxury streetwear brand, Rose in Good Faith, to release a collaborative merch line. The line is dedicated to the memory of Gus, his music and his desire to help the world.

·         Twenty One Pilots’ Tyler Joseph and wife Jenna Black shared a short video announcing the birth of their daughter Rosie Robert Joseph, who arrived February 9th. She also mentions the reasoning behind the middle name choice was to match Tyler’s.

·         According to social media posts, YUNGBLUD and Travis Barker of Blink-182 seem to have pranked Machine Gun Kelly on MTV‘s Punk’d. Over this past weekend, Barker posted to his Instagram story a photo with a sign saying “you got PUNK’D.”

·         Vans is giving their iconic checkerboard shoe a psychedelic makeover with its new line, featuring a tie-dye color scheme. The design will be overlaid atop their ComfyCush Era and Old Skool models.

___

Check in next Tuesday for more “Posi Talk with Sage Haley,” only at @sagehaleyofficial!

Tano Yuka answers fan questions on ameblo

Q. What is your makeup routine? A. Kate's concealer, marshmallow coloured finishing powder, black liquid eyeliner and lancome mascara. Lipstick is often either Yves Saint Laurent or Chanel Q. I'm currently watching the W'z anime and I've been keeping Tano-san in mind while paying attention to the character of Hana-chan. I can see you do well. Also, I am looking forward to your birthday soon! A. I am also looking forward to performing as Hana! I think maybe we are a bit similar, but maybe I should try a different approach? Q. Do you have cake on your birthday? A. It is my birthday so of course! Q. Are you going to release a CD? Of course there are songs from Tano's AKB era, but I'd really like a solo CD! A. I currently don't have any plans on releasing music. I would like to work on musicals and stage plays. I wonder what other people think about this kind of activity? Q. How do you decide what to wear every day? Is there some kind of code you follow, like only wearing three colours or less? A. I look at myself in the mirror and contemplate for a bit. Is there such a rule that it is okay if it's within three colours? I don't feel very fashionable. Q. Do you prefer going to an aquarium or the zoo? A. The aquarium! I have to admit I can't really stand the odour of the zoo. Q. My repertoire of questions is too small! I always send the same things and Tano-san has already responded on instagram story once. A. I am glad no matter what you send! Q. Could you please tell us what your goal for being 22 is? A. I think I just want to live a healthy life like my grandmother. My goals keep changing all the time! I would like to tackle going abroad, though. Q. I have a few questions! First, what is Tano's hair care? I like to dye my hair ends similar to you, but my hair keeps breaking. And how do I put on a towel? Next, is there anything you particularly like? I would like to send you a gift! Even if there is no commitment to your hair care, please let me know what you do with your hair. I would like to imitate what you are doing. If this bothers you, I understand if you don't answer! A. I don't have any particular hair care haha I can maintain smoothness simply with hair dressing. As for the towel, roll up your hair normally and the tip has to come out at the end. My favourite things are lipstick and nail polish, especially red. Q. I would like to go to Tano-chan's solo live event some day! A. I am planning to have such an event some day! Q. If you could have been in a foreign movie, which one would you want it to be? A. Pitch Perfect! lol Q. What are Tano's "Seven Rules"? A. First, I go to the toilet when I wake up. Second, always use perfume when I leave the house. Third, charge my phone while I sleep and go out with 100%. Actually, I only have these three rules haha Q. What pyjamas is Tano-chan wearing? A. GU! I love GU pyjamas! They're cute and comfortable Q. Which artists do you listen to the most? A. SUPER BEAVER, sumika, Creep Hive (クリープハイプ), Makaron Enpitsu (マカロニえんぴつ), Shota Shimizu (清水翔太). That's these days at least! Q. I'm looking forward to your 22nd birthday. Is there anything you'd like to achieve? A. I would like to get a photo book. Q. Question 1, which kind of roles would you like to play in a drama? And question 2, have you hung out with any of the girls from your generation since graduation? A. I would like to play a bully or a bad guy. And I see Tomu and Karen regularly. And of course Rina haha Q. A long time ago, I saw the Team K charity event for for the Great East Japan Earthquake and it was very special to me. Is there a performance that is very special to Tano? A. It is also the same performance for me, because my grandmother also came to see the event. Furthermore, there were a lot of members there. Q. I recently changed my job and now I'm feeling a little desperate... how do I get involved successfully and make relationships with my new co-workers? A. I think it is important that you don't fall into despair too much. It is inevitable that you will get together with your coworkers at some point, so just do your best and be yourself! Q. I'm thinking about a birthday gift, could you please tell me what you like? Also, you post a lot of selfies! Do you use an app or a professional camera? A. I think you all have very good sense about what I like. I'm sure whatever it is, I will be happy with it! I use the in-built iPhone camera and the B162 app. Q. I am an adult man who has become interested in oversized clothing because of Tano-chan! I like it but the one thing that remains bothersome is the sleeve that is too long. It looks cute on a girl, but isn't it weird on a man? Do you have suggestions on what to do with the rest of the sleeve? A. I think it can look cute on a man too, by all means, please wear it like that! hahahaha Q. What hair style do you like on a man? A. I think that depends on the person. What suits one person might not suit another. However, I don't like it if someone uses too much hair gel. Q. Where would you like to go if you went abroad? A. First is Taiwan! Second is Rina's home town in Arizona! Q. Do you have an idea for a diet for someone who doesn't like vegetables? You can include working out and so on ~ A. You don't need saccharides so avoid those! And I think it's easiest if you find a gym near a train or subway station so you will be motivated to work out regularly. Q. When are you going to get married? A. Don't ask like it's going to happen soon! lol That's it! I hope to do it again some day soon~!

Chapter Fifty Nine - Mother and Daughter

Ellie gathered her things, preparing a bag for staying overnight at Sandringham. She didn’t know what to bring aside from some extra clothes and a phone charger, Sandringham would have everything else that she needed, but she felt the need to bring more. Everyone was rushing through the corridors doing the same, all of them expecting to be staying the night and waiting, probably not sleeping at all.

The adults had debated whether or not to wake her younger brother and sister, as well as her cousin Jamie, thinking that they would be too irritable and restless to have around the palace when everyone else was feeling quite gloomy, but in the end they had all been brought down to the living room, whining about sleep and complaining. She could hear Lottie crying from all around the house as Kate carried her, telling her vaguely what was happening.

Ellie’s younger brother and sister were still young, they hadn’t had the opportunity to get to know their great grandmother very well, but they could still pick up on the mood. Jamie was quiet, mopey, not saying a word and following his parents around. Everyone was in a sort of hurried silence, freaking out on the inside and quite frazzled on the outside.

But at the same time, we were all kind of expecting this. Mum and Dad had prepared for a shock passing years ago and that hadn’t happened.

Ellie looked around her room once more and spotted something, an old yellow teddy bear that was tucked away in the cushions on the window seat. It hadn’t meant that much to her recently, but now it suddenly called out to her like an old friend. Monty, she used to call him. Named after one of the Queen’s corgis who’d taken a bite out of him when Ellie wasn’t looking. Her great grandmother had given him to her when she was eight years old, and now Monty seemed like the most important thing to put in her bag.

She grabbed the bear and tucked him through the carry handle of her bag, then rushed out of her room. It was a strange atmosphere to stand in, everyone sprinting around from room to room, making sure they had everything they needed. It was exactly the same any time they were heading off on a long tour, or going on holiday, except tonight was so much different.

She didn’t like seeing her parents this way, but it was hard to do anything about it. Alex joined her in the corridor carrying her own bag, shoulders slumped, sulking. She silently frowned at her, her eyes red and teary. They didn’t need to say a word to each other, they could both feel it. Ellie put her arm around her sisters shoulders and guided her back to the living room. Alex seemed to be struggling, like her own personal gravity had been increased drastically, pulling her to the ground. To Ellie it was like dragging a sad sack of flour, pale white and impossible to move.

Anna awaited them at the front door, supervising the transfer of their things into the two cars waiting outside. She seemed to have quickly moved on from the events of earlier, or she was hiding any awkwardness very professionally. She slid Ellie’s bag off her shoulders, taking as much weight off of them as possible.

“Aw, you found Monty?” Anna tucked the teddy bear in, making sure he wouldn’t fall from the carry handle.

Ellie smiled weakly, shrugging. She didn’t really have any words, nobody did. Only the staff seemed to be talking, trying to keep everyone’s spirits up.

“Alex, why don’t you go find Willow?” Anna knelt down, taking Alex’s bag from her too. She was doing her best to be encouraging.

Alex hurriedly reached for her bag again, opening the zip and pulling out a red teddy bear like Monty. She clutched Willow tight to her chest.

No doubt we’re sisters.

“Good girl.” Anna soothingly rubbed Alex’s shoulder before handing their bags to the driver.

Soon the whole family gathered by the door, toddlers on hips, bags in hand, weary faces. They were all ready to leave until footsteps from the living room caught their attention.

“Oh, Taylor.” Kate said, immediately feeling guilty.

Ellie looked at Taylor apologetically, and could feel her entire family giving the singer the same look. It amazed her that Taylor Swift could be treated like such an afterthought, but they had done so.

“Don’t worry about me, it’s a family thing.” Taylor told them, trying to be reassuring. “I have a ride coming to pick me up.”

“Thank you for coming today.” Emma told her.

“No worries, please don’t let me hold you up.”

“All right, come on girls.” Kate started ushering them out the door.

Ellie spotted Taylor blow her a kiss just before the door closed behind them, then that was it. It was just family now, and the next few days would have them all come together, all relying on each other to stay strong.

They got into two cars, Cambridge’s in one, Sussex’s in the other. Her mother had been on the phone, her father too, both calling their relatives to head back to Sandringham. In the next few hours the palace would be filled with as many family members as possible, all there to see what they all believed to be the end of an era.

The doctor had told Will that the Queen was asleep, resting, but that they should all fear the worst. Both cars sped through the countryside, making the short drive from Amner to Sandringham almost instantaneous. For all they knew, Elizabeth might be gone by the time they arrived. Everyone wanted the chance to say goodbye, to spend one last moment with her before she passed away.

They were all dealing with it differently. Alex was sniffling again when they arrived, Will was distant and distracted, Kate kept looking at Will, squeezing his hand and rubbing his arm, worried for him. Ellie could feel tears rolling down her cheeks, but she couldn’t seem to do much more except irritably wipe her eyes with her sleeve and then do it again once a new set of tears had built up too much.

She had avoided thinking about it, but as they parked in the forecourt and made their way towards the massive Sandringham doors, it dawned on her how huge this really was. What this meant for the monarchy, for Britain, for the world. So many generations of people had grown up and passed away with Queen Elizabeth on the throne, there had never been a change as big as what was coming in the next few days, months, years.

Sydney was there again, waiting to greet them and thankfully not halting them to ensure correct protocol was followed. He seemed just as frazzled as all of them.

He’ll probably be out of the job soon too.

Sydney led them through the palace, through corridors lined with huge framed portraits of former kings and queens. Ellie glanced at each one as much as she could whilst her family quick walked their way towards the Queen’s bedchamber. Each painting charted the line of monarchs all the way up to the Queen herself, but then they kept going. In the lobby outside the bedchamber doors, the portraits were much more familiar.

First there was Charles, her grandfather, standing on his own in full ceremonial uniform, covered in all sorts of ribbons, sashes, medals and looking a bit cheeky. Then there was William, the next in line, her dad, wearing the same red uniform, sword at his side, covered in slightly less decorations but he had inherited his dad’s cheeky smirk.

And then the last of the single portraits was her, Princess Eleanor, probably wearing the most glamourous outfit of her life so far. There was no military uniform, instead she wore a blue drop waist dress, sparkling jewellery on her wrists, neck and fingers with her hair pinned up in a towering, elaborate updo decorated with pearls. It was modest, at least compared to the other portraits, and had been a gift to her on her twelfth birthday. She remembered sitting for the photos, being preened and prodded by her mother Kate and grandmother Camilla, who fought over how they wanted Ellie to be portrayed. In the end it felt like a mix of modern and traditional, like a mix of Audrey Hepburn and Grace Kelly, very 60’s. It was something that screamed ‘Princess’. Ellie had never looked more like royalty than she did in that portrait.

I went to Marlborough not long after. I couldn’t wait to leave in the end.

The irony hit her hard, that on a day where she’d been forced to play out her princess role, just like she’d done in the portrait, she had also gone so far in the opposite direction. For a few hours she dressed and felt like a commoner, contemplating leaving royalty behind for good, and yet by the end of the day she was in a palace, surrounded by past and future kings and queens, about to move even closer to the throne.

Sydney knocked on the large white oak doors. One door opened slightly and Ellie peaked inside, but all she could see were the posts of the bed and what looked like her great grandfather Phillip sitting on the bedside. Everyone rushed to get inside, but the doctor who opened the door barred the way.

“I’m sorry.” He said, glancing at the group. “Only the Dukes are allowed inside.”

Ellie could feel anger bubbling up inside of her, and she could feel it growing inside of her family as well. William and Harry moved to quickly assure everyone. “We’ll come back out in a minute.”

They disappeared inside and the door rudely shut in Ellie’s face. They all felt so unimportant in that moment, so secondary. Ellie just wanted to go inside and see her granny, to tell her about how stressful her day had been and be told it would all work out in the end. Instead she had to wait outside with everyone else, eventually agreeing with the doctor when her baby brother and sister started crying again and everyone was getting worked up. They were all in need of the Queen’s calming, steady influence but it wasn’t there. Someone else would have to stand up and lead, they all would.

Ellie paced around, keeping her distance from the rest of her family. She could feel herself getting stressed out and didn’t want to make George and Charlotte feel worse. The portraits were staring down at her, all reminding her of what was coming. She desperately wanted her father and uncle to step out of the bedchamber and tell them all was fine, that the Queen was sleeping like a log and looked ready to go for another twenty years.

I don’t want her to go.

The door opened once again, William and Harry slid out, not letting anyone get a peak inside before the door closed. It wasn’t good news. Ellie could tell by their solemn expressions. She turned away and looked out a window into the pitch black night, but she could still see them in the glass reflections. There was no escaping what was going to happen.

“It’s not looking good. She’s resting now but she’s on her last legs.” William announced, looking around at everyone, Harry nodding grimly beside him.

Emma ran her hands down her face, her eyes watering as she approached Harry and pulled him into a tight hug. Kate had stood close to the door, George sitting on her hip as she waited. After Will had finished speaking, she put free arm around his neck and pulled him close.

Both the men were starting to break, she could see a few of her Dad’s tears starting to roll down Kate’s back when he rested his head on her shoulder.

Alex grabbed Ellie’s hand, impatiently tugging her away from the window. Her sister wasn’t in the mood for any of Ellie’s shit, she wanted them all to be together. Her sister pulled her along to the group, gathering Charlotte with her. Jamie floated in beside them, ignoring any grudges he may or may not have had in the past. Tonight they were all a family, they needed to be strong together.

Kate shook her head to get hair out of her face, then wiped her eyes. “Well, we best get settled into our rooms. It’s going to be a long night.”

The group hug gradually broke apart as Kate and Emma organised everyone. Their tones were light, cheerful, trying to raise their family’s spirits.

Kate put her hand on Ellie’s back and leaned in close to her ear. “Ellie, honey, could you help me with the guest bedrooms?”

Ellie wanted nothing more than to escape the palace, but a guest bedroom away from the portraits would have to do, and yet being alone with her mother wasn’t very appealing either. “Sure mum.”

Kate put her arm around Ellie’s shoulders and guided her away from the family, through into another corridor. They arrived in one of the guest bedrooms not long after, close to the Queen’s room just in case they had to make their way over there fast.

She had felt like she was handling things well, better than everyone else, but the longer they were in Sandringham, surrounded by hundreds of years of history, the more it felt like she was about to break. Kate seemed to be handling things better, someone had to.

“Ellie, how are you feeling?” her mother asked her. She opened a cupboard and started handing Ellie fresh bedsheets and pillows. The staff would normally have done it, but they either weren’t awake or her mother had insisted on doing it herself.

“I’m scared for Granny, Mum.” Ellie told her, not really wanting to talk. Each word seemed to weaken her resolve, making her lip quiver.

“We’re all in this together poppet.” Kate said. She could feel her mother watching her closely.

As they made the beds in almost complete silence, Kate kept giving her worried glances. Every tired stretch, every slight pout, every exasperated sigh, her mother was worrying for her. Ellie could tell that she desperately wanted to initiate a conversation, to get her talking.

Soon the silence was too much, Ellie started to sob quietly. She kept her back turned and wiped her eyes on the sheets, but her emotions boiling over were all too obvious to Kate. Her mother rushed over, sat Ellie down on the side of the bed, took the sheets from her hands and tossed them aside, all in one smooth motion.

Ellie broke down, slumping forward and putting her head in her hands. She felt her mother’s arm drape itself around her, pulling her in closer to the warmth of her chest.

“It’s okay.” Kate whispered into her ear, resting her head against Ellie’s.

Where was all this back when I needed it back at the party?

“I’m fine!” Ellie said, freeing herself.

“You’re not fine.”

“I am!” Ellie wanted to get away.

“You’re not fine, Eleanor.” Her mother insisted. “It’s okay to be sad right now.”

“Oh. Is it?” Ellie replied back snarkily. She hated being this way, but every word her mother said just seemed to bug her.

Ellie felt her mother recoil slightly, she could tell that her words had had a bit more cutting edge than she intended.

“This is about more than Granny isn’t it?” Her mother asked in an accusing tone. It sounded like she was having a revelation, but when Ellie looked in her eyes she could tell her mother had known something was up for a while.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Ellie lied.

“You’ve been distant with me ever since the party. Probably even before that too.”

Ellie pushed herself up off the bed and tried to make a quick exit, totally avoiding her mother’s eyes, but Kate grabbed her wrist and stopped her in her tracks. “Just tell me what’s been bothering you, Ellie.”

Ellie pulled away again, her mother’s grip tightened. “Come on, talk to me!” Kate raised her voice, making Ellie freeze. It was the loudest anyone had spoken in hours. “We always used to talk to each other Ellie.”

Kate tenderly stroked her wrist with her thumb, trying to coax something out of her.

“Yeah, I wonder why that stopped.” Ellie said sarcastically. Kate let go of her wrist, letting her slip free. She could feel her mother hurting behind her, then spotted her reflection in a nearby window. Kate stared at the back of her head incredulously, confused, upset.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kate asked. Ellie slowly made her way towards the window, unable to look her mother in the eye and instead making do with her reflection. She wiped her eyes and stayed silent, contemplating her next words carefully. Everything was boiling up to the surface, everything that had happened that day, and everything before. Three years at Marlborough had drastically changed their relationship to the point where Kate didn’t know her anymore, things could no longer be easily talked out.

“I just want to know what’s going on with you sweetheart. Your teachers have told me you’re not taking part in school activities, you’re not doing well in class and you’re not making any friends.”

Oh god, the teachers have been talking to her?

“Are you still homesick? Do you need to come back to home-schooling for a while?”

Ellie gritted her teeth, growing more angry as she stood there and listened. She watched her expression darken in her window reflection, and that just made her angrier.

“No.” Ellie said forcefully, holding her words back.

“And what happened today? You disappear from your own birthday party for an hour and come back looking like you’ve just been in a mosh pit?” Kate stood up from the bed and slowly closed in on her, her voice rising again. “I tried to get you interested in something, I tried getting you to talk to so many inspirational people. I tried to light some sort of fire within you but you wouldn’t have it. You ran away and cut yourself off from the rest of us.”

Ellie buried her head in her hands, her face contorting in anger any frustration as she listened. When she couldn’t bear it anymore, she span around and let everything go. Everything that she felt build up whenever she went back home, everything that twisted her up inside. She needed to let her inner Lexi out once more.

“I wouldn’t have it?” Ellie shouted back at her mother. “I wouldn’t have it? Mum, for fourteen years our birthdays have -always- been small family and friends things, there’s been -NO- work and no need to be royal, until today when you paraded me around in front of everyone. You didn’t let me relax, you just kept on dragging me from person to person.”

She paced away from her mother and then back again.  “You know how anxious I get when we do official engagements! I don’t want to feel that way on my birthday! I had to fake needing the toilet just to get away from you!

They were both hurting, but they both getting everything out. Ellie figured they had gone this far, they might as well go all the way, even if it was the first time she’d ever yelled that much at her mother.

“I know I haven’t made many friends at school, but you didn’t even bother to send any invites!”

“Wha… Ellie…” Kate had been frozen, but that accusation clearly confused her. Ellie interrupted her before she could explain.

“Do you want to know why I snuck out? Do you want to know why I’m struggling in school? It’s because I don’t know how to be normal! “Ellie waved her hands about to distract from the tears running down her face. “I don’t know how to have interests when as soon as I like something you start talking about charities and patronages. I don’t know how to live up to everyone’s stupid expectations that I’ll be a great Queen. How am I supposed to be do anything when I hear half the people at Marlborough talking about how outdated the Monarchy is?!”

Ellie barged past her mother and fell back down onto the bed, angry, tired and exhausted. When Kate sat down beside her again, she couldn’t be bothered to push her away. “It’s too much pressure. I don’t know how to do this. I don’t want to do this.”

They sat together in silence for several minutes, letting the words that they’d shouted at each other sink in. Kate hesitantly hugged her once again and Ellie let her. It was nice to remind herself that there was still a deep love between them, but something needed to be said.

“I hate coming home.” Ellie spoke bitterly, wiping her eyes and nose.

“Don’t say that.” Her mother was now crying too, but she didn’t feel as fragile as everyone else.

“I may not be doing well at school, but I prefer it to here. As soon as I get home I get treated like I’m about to be coronated. At least at Marlborough I can keep to myself.

She thought she had been doing okay at school, that she was just keeping her head down, avoiding the spotlight and getting on with her work, but apparently her teachers thought otherwise. Sure the work was hard, and she was a bit lonely, but she had at least some people she could talk to.

Ellie pushed in closer to her mother, sinking into her hug and just enjoying being close to her again.

“You know, this is actually the first time in ages that I just feel like your daughter.”

Kate took a moment to reply. Ellie could feel her mother let out a determined breath through her nose. “Ellie, honey, before anything, before the titles and before the throne, you are my daughter, my little girl.” She pushed Ellie out of the hug so that she could look her straight in the eyes. “I’m sorry if you think I’ve lost sight of that, but I’ve always had your best interests at heart. Your Dad and I just want you to live your best life, to take advantage of your freedom at school.”

Kate wiped more tears from her eyes whilst Ellie sniffed. “We want you to enjoy your life. We’re just worried you’re not letting yourself.”

“How can I let myself?” Ellie asked despairingly. “Every day I’m reminded about what’s coming.”

Ellie got up again, she didn’t want to sit and hug it out with her Mum until she’d said everything she needed to say. It felt like Kate just wanted to wrap her up and stop her from unravelling.

“And now this.” Ellie gestured at seemingly everything, her mother, the beds, the pictures on the wall, the whole building. “Everyone is getting older, everyone is getting stressed out. You and Dad are even fighting. What’s up with that? You never fight?”

“Who told you that?” Her mother asked, cautiously as if she didn’t want people to hear.

“Charlotte, Mum. Even Lottie knows. She says you yell at her and George.”

“Eleanor, lower your tone.” Kate warned her.

“Mum!” Ellie shouted back. She wanted an answer. She could never imagine her parents shouting at her when she was younger.

“Eleanor, look, we’re all dealing with more pressure. We’re all taking on a lot more work.” She paused, steadying herself and taking a breath. “We’re all dealing with what’s probably about to happen.”

Ellie rubbed her face and put her hands on her hips, trying to hold back the tears. She could see her mother was in the verge of breaking again too.

“I cant deny it’s been tough since you and Alex left for school. We got through those rough early years and then raised two amazing girls. We got used to living in a nice quiet house… We’re blessed to have your little brother and sister, you know, we didn’t think we’d have any more… but it’s been tough to readjust. Now that we’re a bit older and with all the extra work as well, we haven’t been around for them as much as we were with you and Alex.”

Her mother was clearly ashamed of herself, so Ellie sat back down with her and hugged her back. It was Kate’s turn to be consoled.

“Then why do we do this? Why do we keep up the royal act? It’s just dividing us.”

“You know why Ellie.” Kate told her, looking up at the ceiling and half rolling her eyes. She’d been asked that question too many times.

“Duty.” Ellie said grimly.

“Yes, like it or not, you are a Princess. One day you will be a Queen. It’s your duty to fulfil that role, just as we all fulfil ours.”

“I don’t want that, Mum.”

If I feel this much stress now, how on earth am I supposed to do it when I’m Queen?

“None of us want it, sweetheart.”

“What?” Ellie was perplexed.

“No. It’s the most difficult job in the world. It holds you back from so many things in life.”

“Then why do you want to force me into it?”

“Because at the same time you can do so much, you can empower billions of people, you can inspire change. You already have the influence now to do great things, things you could never do in a normal life.” Kate took her hand in her own. “So many people settle for what they have in life because they can’t change how the world works, but you can! That’s why we wanted you to cultivate some interests. Think of what you could do for sports or… or charities, or for the arts if it was something that you loved.”

“I could get Villa into the Champions League, then maybe Dad would be happy.” Ellie said, trying to relax everything. She’d said what she needed to say.

Kate laughed. “That would definitely be a misuse of power. Why not Reading Town instead?”

“Hah, sure Mum.” Ellie smiled back at her.

“Ellie, promise me something?”

“What?”

“If I give you a break from being a Princess, take away any pressure from the staff, from your grandparents, from me and your Dad, do you promise you’ll do better in school?”

“Definitely.”

“This does of course mean I want to see you on weekends and your Dad and I can visit when we want.”

Ellie begrudgingly accepted. “Yes, of couuurse.”

“Come on.” Kate pulled her up and put a bedsheet in her hands. “Let’s finish these off and make everyone comfortable. We’ll get through this together.”

" Ummm. " Basil presents her with some leftover slice of a Black Forest cake he had from another day.

" Happy birthday, Childe's sister. " Don't look at him, he just learned of her birthday literally today.

birthday day date!! / Not Accepting.

Stares at him. Stares at the pitiful slice of cake that clearly came from a bigger, probably already eaten cake. Stares at it. Stares some more at Basil. Her face is utterly unreadable throughout.

But whatever pros and cons she seems to weigh in her head, it appears favorable for him - slowly, very slowly, she accepts the cake. Her expression continues to be inexplicably blank. Neither does she say anything as she takes the little offering. But considering she didn't refuse or yell at him for his cake-gift... that's probably a good thing right—?

"Thanks. I'm feeding this to the fish." That's all she says as she quickly turns and starts walking off with the cake.

2.8k, mostly fluff with a small bit of violence somewhere. G/T rating.

This is from the HC that Valkyrie absolutely loves Disney songs. This is written so that each scene is about a different Lion king song, but it was this one that basically inspired it; (We are one- Lion King 2) https://youtu.be/glDGAo9SIqs

This is also a birthday fic! I hope you have a very happy birthday Silky, and I hope you enjoy!!! Also side note, I love all your headcanons and I agree that these two are flipping adorable. Sorry if they at all seem ooc to you.

____________

The first time Ela had ever come across the woman, she was singing a damn Disney song. Not that Lion King wasn’t amazing, but she honestly didn’t think her timing was the best.

They were meeting at a busy cafe under the guise of school friends for an intel hand off, but when when Ela wandered over, pretending to be excited, the woman just grinned goofily and continued humming some random song as she stood to pull her into a hug, slyly dropping something into her pocket.

“Amanda! It’s been far too long wow, I’m glad I found some time to see you while you’re in town.”

“I’ll actually be here for a bit! Jack’s got a job in one of the law firms downtown so maybe a few months?”

She made up something about loving to show her around if their schedules match up, before starting to gossip about something one of their supposed ex school mates had gotten up to.

The woman she knew to actually be the Seal ‘Valkyrie’ started humming the same tune again as she talked, and it finally clicked in her mind what it was.

Hakuna Matata, what a wonderful phrase.

She paused and squinted her eyes into an accusatory glare.

“Are you humming… Hakuna Matata?” She regretted asking the minute humming changed to singing. Loud, obnoxious singing. Immediately she sprung across the table to slap a hand across the woman’s mouth.

“What are you doing?” She all but hissed as laughter bubbles under her palm. They were meant to be inconspicuous and believable, she doubted bursting into Disney counted as that.

“Ok, ok.” She removed her hand, settling back into her seat as she glared off looks from other customers. “Sorry, I’ve had it stuck in my head all day.” A disarming smile was shot her way and she sighed, deciding to let it slide.

They met again a little while after operation Orange Sky and it soon occurred to Ela that it wasn’t a one off. No, it seemed to be a regular thing around the operative.

The next time it happened, they were on their first practice operation as Rainbow Six members in a killhouse.

They had both wandered from their objective room and had ended up in a small room with a hatch on the floor and two windows, one of which was half busted open. Ela had her gun aimed steadily through it and into the yard below them when it started.

“Be prepared for sensational news! A shining new era is tiptoeing nearer.”

She moved from view in seconds, spinning to glare at her teammate for giving away their location.

Valkyrie hadn’t moved from her careful angle on the doorway, hardly even moving as she continued to sing, doing the next line in a silly voice.

“But, where do we feature?”

Ela couldn’t help herself as she said the next line with a growl.

“Just listen to teacher.”

The smile she received was blinding and she rolled her eyes in response, turning back to the window to peek. At least she shut up.

“I know it sounds sordid, but you’ll be rewarded-”

She spoke too soon.

With a huff she gave up and left the room.

__

Despite the usually ridiculous timing of her Disney songs, Ela realised she found it amusing. It bugged her at first but Valkyrie more than proved herself plenty of times as a fully capable operator who never got stunted by her silly habit. If it wasn’t causing issues then Ela didn’t see it as a problem.

As a matter of fact, it was kind of endearing.

Today they were both laid across the couches in the Rec room, Ela quietly drawing while Meghan scrolled through some app on her phone.

It happened gradually. She didn’t notice at first, too focused on her drawing.

The tapping was quiet and repetitive and so she passed it off as a bit of boredom. After a little bit she recognised that it was a regular beat and not just random, around the time she also decided it was distracting her from her work. She glanced up, ready to tell the other woman to shut up, only to catch a gaze that was locked on her with a playful smirk.

Meghan was sat upright, tapping against the table and waiting for Ela to finally look up. When she did and met her gaze, humming started to match the beat.

It look her a second to recognise it, but when she did she wanted to literally facepalm. Huffing a short laugh, she gave the Seal her ‘are you serious?’ eyes, before giving in.

After all, she didn’t doubt the woman’s persistence. She probably wouldn’t stop until she did.

“I’m gonna be a mighty king, so enemies beware.”

“Well I’ve never seen a king of beasts with quite so little hair!” Valkyrie immediately jumped in for the birds part- Zazu if she remembered correctly.

“I’m gonna be the main event, like no king was before. I’m brushing up, I’m looking down, I’m working on my roar.” She couldn’t help but return the amused smile the blonde sent her, snorting when she exaggeratedly threw out an arm for her next part.

“Thus far, a rather uninspiring thing.”

She couldn’t help humouring her as she leapt to her feet and shouted “Oh I just can’t wait to be king!”

Meghan stood too, dancing her way over as they continued the impromptu duet, slowly getting louder and louder until they were basically belting the lyrics, arms waving around as they ‘acted out’ the song.

Toward the end, Sledge appeared in the doorway with an eyebrow raised and yelped in surprise when he was immediately drawn in, the two girls bouncing around him like idiots as he joined in for the final lines, arms wiggling above him like one of the inflatable tube men some stores use.

As they came down from laughter, Sledge decided it was time for a party and put music on, leading to all three dancing until they tired themselves out, much to the amusement of the crowd they gathered. Other people continued to dance while Ela dropped back to the couch she originally was in, sending a cheeky wink to Valkyrie as she fell to the floor and spread out, winking and wiggling her eyebrows back only after situating herself in an appropriate starfish position.

_____

A few months later they were in a boat on the way to an op, and Ela was nervous. This wasn’t the sort of operation she was used to. No, she’d never been comfortable on the water so securing an oil liner that had been overtaken and planted with a bomb wasn’t ideal for her.

Heck, the only reason she was chosen was because there were so many opfor and they felt that her mines would be ideal for disorienting, especially as they were on high waves.

Her sister unfortunately was on another mission so that left her. There were two teams, both lead by the Rainbow Six Seals. Alpha was tasked to clear and secure hostages while her team, Bravo, disarmed the explosives. Bravo included herself, Echo, Jäger, Rook, and-

“Deception, disgrace, evil as plain as the scar on his face.” Valkyrie sent her a wink before lifting her voice a little. “Deception-”

“An outrage.”

“Disgrace!”

“For shame.”

Everyone laughed at Echo joining in, clearly knowing the song well. Jäger looked a little confused but still amused by the antics, clearly not used to Valkyrie at all.

“He asked for trouble the moment he came!”

Their boat bounced over the water but Ela didn’t even think about it as the whole team morale lifted and they all carried on singing to random songs, tapping beats on the metal of their vessel.

They fell silent, serious modes engaging as their comms came to life to announce their approach. All the same, Valkyrie send a reassuring smile to the girl next to her, squeezing her leg before responding to her radio to say their team was ready for boarding.

The boat stopped and they climbed outside, shooting two grappling hooks upward before starting their ascent.

_____

The mission was successful overall, but due to a mild explosion from an undetected bomb, Valkyrie and Jäger had been injured, the latter more drastically. All the same, they were both returned to base unconscious and now resided in the medical bay.

It was really a shame that IQ wasn’t available for their mission. Really, Ela was angry at their superiors for their planning despite the fact that she knew they couldn’t simply send the German girl back for immediate redeployment.

Still, as she sat by Meghan’s bed, she couldn’t help her grumbling. The beeping of her heart monitor was as irritating as it was relieving. The injured woman had woken briefly earlier but fell back asleep shortly after from her pain medication, but all the same Ela was glad because, much the same as the beeping, it meant she was ok.

A ruckus out in the hall caught her attention as she heart the raised voice of Doc.

“Bandit, Dominic! Don’t you wake her!”

The GSG9 rushed through the doorway, Doc tailing him. He stopped in the doorway when he caught sight of her repositioning herself to the end of Valkyrie’s bed and crossing her arms, radiating hostility.

The Bandit completely ignored her, marching past her- or attempting to. Her hand shot out to grab his arm and push him back, causing him to stumble in surprise before turning his dark glare to her. She merely returned it with her own.

“Get out of the road, arschgesicht.” She didn’t need to understand German to know he was throwing insults so she bristled a little at the word.

“Leave.”

“Your friend here is the reason Jäger is in the room over! She has some fucking explaining to do.” Her fists were clenching and unclenching in hopes of keeping calm, for Doc’s sake, the man watching exasperatedly from the door.

“No one noticed the bomb. We’re all to blame and have all been chastised.” Her voice was cold but calm and her words measured.

Clearly that wasn’t the reply Bandit wanted.

“She should have seen it, Jäger could be dead and it’d be her fault! Maybe she’s not a fit team l-“

Ela’s fist met his jaw before he could block it.

He stabilised himself and came back in heavy retaliation, more than ready for the fight Ela would happily provide.

Doc rushed in and yelled for them to stop, trying to push himself in between them without success. When he realised they weren’t going to stop, he rushed out to get another ops assistance.

They traded a few blows before Bandit took them to the ground, punches landing across Ela’s ribs and face before she rolled out from under him and wrapped her elbow around his throat in a choke hold.

The bastard squirmed valiantly but he couldn’t escape and in moments he was out cold. She dropped him unceremoniously for the others to deal with when they returned, sparing him a kick to the stomach before she moved back to her chair.

Valkyrie was awake, merely watching the fight through hazy eyes. When she turned her gaze from Bandit to Ela she frowned at her bruises, getting a careless shrug.

“It’s the circle of life.”

Meghan blinked and confusion and she laughed.

_____

She never got an apology from Bandit but she never expected nor cared for one. She understood worrying for a friend and the desire to defend them, despite the fact that she was sure those two were more.

Doc told Valkyrie to abstain from exercise for a few weeks while her bruised rib healed, but still she lingered around the gym. It was easily noticeable just how much she wanted to be working out but she did as told without complaint.

Ela of course noticed her friend lingering and invited her over to talk whenever she could, trying to distract her and keep her entertained.

By the end of the second week she had an idea.

She waited outside the gym room, lock pick in her pocket and cheeky grin on her face. Sure enough, Valkyrie rounded the corner at her usual gym time, eyes on the ground as she listened to Blackbeard talk. She snorted and punched his arm in reply to something, causing him to laugh.

He met Ela’s eyes and she respectfully nodded, getting a wide and goofy smile in response. He mumbled something else, causing Valkyries head to snap up. Her cheeks were slightly flushed as they stopped in the doorway.

“Hey,”

“I’ll leave you girls be. I can feel my arms going floppy-” he nudged Meghan but ignored her scowl. “Nice to see you Elżbieta.” He ignored Ela’s scowl too as he strut off with a laugh.

“What a dick.”

“Yep.”

They both looked at each other before breaking into laughter. They both loved the man and couldn’t deny it, he was like the big brother neither of them ever had.

“So anyway, I’ve got an idea.” She wandered across to the staircase door just beside the gymnasium entrance.

“Are we going to get in trouble?” Ela shrugged as she knelt and started picking the lock.

“It’s possible, but I’d say it’ll be worth it. Especially because I saw Buck and Jackal enter earlier.”

“…Buck and Jackal? What have they got to do with anything?”

The lock clicked and Ela quickly opened the door, ushering her friend inside.

“You’ll see.”

The climbed up to the room that looked down over the full area, moving to crouch along the furthest wall to cross to the room out of sight. When Meghan spotted the sound system she frowned before a mischievous smile lit her face.

“Oh, we’re not, are we?” Ela merely grinned over her shoulder in reply. “What song do you have?”

“Just wait. You’ll love it, I promise.”

They stopped next to it, Valkyrie watching over Ela’s shoulder as she plugged her phone in and brought up her song of choice.

“Oh my god. Wait I’ve gotta bring up my camera.” She laughed as she grabbed out her own phone and moved to the windows corner, laying on the ground to hide as best she could still.

Throwing a thumbs up to the green haired girl, they both giggled as the songs swapped.

“I can see what’s happening, and they don’t have a clue. They’ll fall in love, and here’s the bottom line, our trio’s down to two!”

‘Can you feel the love’ filled the air and caused everyone to stop, looking around in confusion.

As predicted, Buck’s face lit with red as Jackal winked at him, sitting down his weights to start shimmying toward him exaggeratedly. Buck just buried his head.

They didn’t miss the look shared between Sledge and the new member, Maestro, which definitely intrigued them.

Some people decided to continue working out while others started singing the song and dancing in a silly manner. Blackbeard glanced up to them while laughing, causing Rook- who had been spotting him while he did bench presses- to also look up and spot them. He shook his head while the two continued to record, giggling as Jackal draped himself over his flustered boyfriend.

_____

Ela had noticed something the other day. Valkyrie loved Disney and often randomly sung songs from it but… never Lion King. That was only for when she was around. It had unintentionally become their thing.

The idea warmed her heart and cemented her choice.

She wandered through the halls, seeking out her friend as she hummed the song that had been stuck in her head all of the past week.

She already knew to go to the shooting range, had been told where to meet the woman.

The air was warm when she stepped out into it, eyes meeting Valkyrie’s that had turned to see who had joined her outside. Thankfully, no one was around. She was confident in their relationship but she couldn’t help the small amount of anxiety bubbling in her.

Nonetheless she strode forward, humming the Lion King 2 a little louder to distract herself, the upbeat tune drowning out the nerves.

Of course, Meghan shot her a strange look as soon as she was within hearing distance, most likely recognising the song.

Ela didn’t stop, marching until she was within arms reach where she reached out and pulled her friend in, clasping their lips together. It took a moment for Valkyrie to respond to the kiss, most likely shocked. Still, she gradually melted into Ela’s hands, soft lips returning the movement before they broke apart, resting their foreheads together.

Meghan mumbled the next line with a fond smile.

“Upendi, it means love, doesn’t it?”

Robotic Shance

It was a new era. Robots roamed the streets after those who were wealthy enough to own one. They did everything, anything the owner told them to. The robots were slowly becoming a threat for those who used the bots for bad. Murder was the first conviction that made the bots a bad idea. It was worse for the robot than it was for the master, the bots were accused of completely doing it on their own. Humans believed the human saying they didn't give the bot that order than the actual bot who said they were only following orders.

It was a cruel world for most bots, many of them were shut down and kept in a cell until they could be reprogrammed. Others, who did major crimes, were taken apart limb by limb. They couldn't feel physical pain but they could feel pain emotionally and mentally. Watching themselves get ripped apart was traumatizing for bots and some were never able to get over the events.

On top of bots being convicted of murder or being tortured, they were badly treated commonly by humans. If they were sent out alone, they would be tripped or sometimes the bot would come home without an arm. It really was cruel on how the bots were treated. Those who hated bot treatement protested or were sent outside the city to live in the dying country side.

Humans got bots mainly for the daily labor they were too lazy to do themselves. Anything the humans didn't want to do, they made the bots do them. Some bots were appointed to those who were disabled. Since the mental hospitals or just general hospitals were filling quickly from bot attacks, patients were sent away with a robot to take care of them.

Robots who were taking care of their disabled master were the most treated badly. Humans didn't think robots were the correct caretakers for other humans, they thought they weren't good enough to take care of one of their precious fellow humans. The bots who took care of their human had a very visible Red Cross on their forehead, making them even more vulnerable to being attacked.

Lance had a bot, one of those that took care of him. After trying to commit suicide many times, the mental hospital sent him away with a bot. As much as Lance said he didn't want one, they pushed the robot onto him and he was only left with the decision to keep it.

His bot was a male, a law that was executed so the human and bot don't fall in love. The bot's name was Shiro, a bulky, well built bot that always greeted Lance with a smile. Lance, still unhappy about having a bot, never returned the smile and only ignored him. Lance was one of the few people who hated that bots were a thing because of how humans had become. All humans had become greedy and lazy after World War 3 and everything was destroyed. Lance, for a long time, thought it was the world's way of grieving all their loss but thought differently when they didn't change at all.

Shiro's character was quite nice and Lance felt guilty for ignoring him all the time. All the bot wanted to do was take care of him and he just treated him like he didn't exist. He couldn't imagine how that made the poor bot feel. He knew if he was ignored, he wouldn't be able to handle that and he would go into another stage of depression. Shiro, luckily, didn't have to be ordered around and did things he felt needed to be done. He went out to get groceries, he paid the bills by himself, and he even went out to get Lance's medicine, going as far as making sure Lance had taken it.

Shiro was taller than Lance by a couple of inches, maybe a bit more than just a few. The bot had a strange hairstyle, one that was ordered by Lance. He had a white floof of hair that covered the center of his forehead, the hair covered the Red Cross on the bot's forehead. It was the least Lance could do, he felt obligated to keep the bot from harm. It was his bot and even if he didn't want it, he still had to protect it at some cost.

Lance had ordered that Shiro wore normal, human clothes. He had asked Keith, a boy he had met from the mental hospital for some clothes for Shiro. The boy complied, he being one of the people who hated the way bots were treated. Keith and him had become friends instantly and frequently met up just to talk about the horrible world. Hunk, Keith's bot, had also become good friends with Shiro so the two would catch up while their humans talked.

It was a rainy day when Lance woke up. The rain poured harshly down on Earth, as it was mad for the way it has become. Lance ignored the storm though, getting up to start his daily routine. He walked down the stairs, smelling pancakes and bacon from the kitchen. A plate of food was sitting at the end of the long dining table with a glass of water and a pill.

Lance smiled a little, knowing Shiro was still wondering around doing things he hadn't ordered him to do. The door of the front door burst open and Lance spun, breath hitching. In the doorway was a circuiting Shiro, Hunk and Keith carrying him in.

Lance set into action, rushing over to his bot, taking the bot's arm from Hunk. "Go get dried up, Hunk. We don't want to worry about you circuiting too." Hunk nodded to the order and went to go get dried off while the two humans dragged the bot to his charging station. Once Shiro was laying on the uncomfortable metal bed, Lance fished out his phone and called up the one bot mechanic he knew was a bot defender.

Lance bit his lip, wishing he could do more than just wait for the mechanic to get here. Keith sat in a chair in the corner while Lance paced the room, clear panic in his expression.

"Look, Lance, you don't need to get so worked up." Keith had sighed, finally unable to watch his friend worry. "Circuiting is common for bots who stay too long in the rain. He'll be fine once Pidge gets here." Lance looked at Keith, ready to argue but thought again it and only nodded his head.

"I know you're right but I can't help worrying. He was out in the rain because I ran out of pills. If I had gotten up earlier, I could've went out to get them instead of him." Lance looked at Shiro, the bot still soaking wet and circuiting. Lance saw that the clothes he had on was soaked and clinging to his robotic body.

"This happens, Lance. Just try to keep calm until Pidge gets-" Lance shushed him, ushering him up from his seat and out the door.

"Sorry Keith, but I'm going to change Shiro's clothes. I can't stand watching it stick to him." Keith nodded, still hesitate to leave Lance alone in the way he was in. Netherless, he turned and walked downstairs to go find his bot.

Lance closed the door to the room and turned to the closet. He knew Shiro wouldn't have much clothes in here but he hadn't expected the closet to only have one other outfit in it. Lance recognized the outfit as the one he had gotten Shiro on the bot's birthday. He always saw Shiro in the same outfit, the bot must've felt the outfit was too precious to wear on a daily basis.

Lance found himself smiling as he took the outfit off it's hanger and turned to the bot. The human boy placed the outfit to the side as he started undressing Shiro from his wet clothes. He struggled to lift the bot up but succeeded and slipped the shirt off his body. He turned to replace the wet shirt with the one he had gotten the bot, it was a nice red plaid shirt that didn't have any buttons. The fabric was soft and Lance knew it would be much more comfortable than the wet clothes he had on.

Lance paused when he turned to put the shirt on Shiro. Faded bruises and scars were visible on the bot's chest. He frowned, tracing a cut that was obviously fresh. Lance slipped on the shirt, deciding he'll ask Shiro about it once he wakes up.

Lance, with heated cheeks, changed Shiro's boxers and pants. Once he was done, a knock brought his long observational stare from Shiro to the door. A small, dorky girl popped her head into the room. Lance smiled, greeting his old friend.

"What did you say caused this?" Pidge hummed as she worked on Shiro. She had the panel on his neck open and she had tools working away on him.

"He went to get my medicine and stayed too long in the rain." Lance replied, biting his nails nervously. Pidge stopped, looking over at him with a deep frown.

"This was not the rain's work." Lance frowned. Before he could ask what she meant, she continued. "Someone opened his panel and tinkered with his wiring that made him start circuiting."

"I- What- Why- How- How could someone do that? Shiro wouldn't just bend over and let someone mess with his set up." Pidge hummed at the thought. She pushed up her glasses and turned back to fixing up Shiro.

"Seems like he didn't do this willingly." The girl grabbed a wire cutter, the sight making Lance flinch. "There's a new type of oil specifically used to make a bot shut down temporarily. Whoever did this wanted Shiro to either murder you or forget who you even are."

Lance shuddered at the thought of dying at Shiro's hands. He shuddered even more at the thought of Shiro forgetting who he was. As much as Lance ignored him, he just couldn't ignore how the bot made him feel. As soon as Shiro was introduced to him, he had felt a surge of want and affection towards the man. He felt wrong for having such feelings and hoped if he ignored the bot and his feelings, that such things would go away. He was wrong, it's been a full year and they haven't even faded in the slightest, only became more evident.

"All done." Lance snapped his attention to the machenic who was now shutting Shiro's panel. She put away her tools before closing the box and standing up. "You just need to tell him to wake up." Lance rushed for his wallet but stopped when Pidge shook her head.

"B-But.." she shook her head, giving him a smile before she exited the room.

Lance turned to Shiro, heart pounding as he opened his mouth to say his order. "Wake up, Shiro." At the order, Shiro's eyes fluttered open and he sat up, eyes turning to Lance.

"Good afternoon, Master Lance." Shiro flashed him that smile. The smile that made his heart flutter. Lance smiled back, watching the bot's shocked face.

"Do you have any idea how much you scared me?" Lance muttered, falling forward and hugging the bot tightly. "Don't ever do that again. From now on, you are not to leave my side." The cold metal arm placed itself on Lance's lower back, holding him back equally as tight.

"Is that an order, Master Lance?" Lance snorted, nodding his head.

"That's an order, Takashi." Lance pulled back, wiping away the tears that had fallen. "And stop calling me 'Master Lance', it's just Lance."

The bot smiled, nodding his head. "Okay, Lance. I won't leave your side ever again. I'll stay by your side forever." Shiro flashed him a goofy smile, warning a small laugh from Lance.

"Good." Lance leaned in, catching the bot's surprisingly soft lips in his. He felt content that Shiro was alright. Shiro was his. He was Shiro's.

~

~

It got a little rushed at the end but I actually really liked how it turned out. Sorry if there’s any mistakes that I haven’t caught that need to be edited. ._. (Edit: I might make this a small little series. So maybe this is part 1)

~

~

Tags to ignore:

MY LA SECRET SESSION EXPERIENCE!

Background:

So Taylor’s been following me for over 2 years now and she’s showed up for me somewhat regularly ever since she followed me which I’m incredibly grateful for (like INCREDIBLY). When she did secret sessions last era, I didn’t even have a fan account for anything and I got all the news off insta and my best friends in real life @thislove-brittany and @thosegeorgiastars13 when we would come into school and talk about how some extremely lucky fans got to go into her home and hang with her for hours on end. At that point we all almost had to laugh because we live in Australia and we weren’t known AT ALL by Taylor and we just told ourselves it was such a far fetched dream it was ridiculous… Fast forward a few months later that next year in 2015, when Taylor followed me – I believe to this day she saw a photo of B, G and I posing as Bad Blood characters, and she followed me from that. So basically the first memory I have of Taylor acknowledging my existence was shared with my 2 best friends, but let me now continue with the story….

 On the 1st of January this year, I wrote this post: 

About 4 weeks ago, things at uni went downhill and I had quite literally hit rock bottom in terms of my stress and my future regarding uni. At the same sort of time Taylor had started joining people’s livestreams but she would do so between the hours of 3-7am Australian time so I just kept waking up to her lurking people and watching their lives while I had zero chances in the first place and it was there and then that I thought to myself ‘I’m never meeting her, I have negative hope that I’ll ever meet Taylor” and basically I spent a few days not logging in very much because I was so upset about everything and just didn’t want to bother. But then I started having so many fun events like friends and family birthday parties over those next few weekends and life felt a bit better. During one of those weeks, Taylor had seen 2 or 3 of my tumblr posts where I complimented people’s selfies and it hit me then that good things were still coming and that she still probably maybe had her eye on me (but it was still just wishful thinking). Then London SS happened and my best friend from England, Katy aka @ethereal-swiftness ended up meeting T and I’d sent her an ask about keeping the secret and Taylor saw that a day later and once again I really started to feel things again and it was almost as if right then I knew something was coming for me – like I just knew.

 Getting Contacted by TN

So it was Wednesday morning on the 18th of October, 5.36am, when B and G texted me about 23 times in a row with messages like “EMENME” “CHECK TUMVLT NOW GO DHCIENEONC DO IT CHEJCK IT” “WE GOT THE SMEDSAHE” so naturally I nearly fell out of my bed because yes, in fact, my 2 best friends in real life had both individually received a confidential message from TN and so I went to check my tumblr and there was nothing there so I was worried at first, but I know they always take a while to send each one out, and once again, by my own intuition, I just knew I was getting one, and knew somehow that all of us were going to meet her together at some point – we’d been on countless walks by the beach all year dreaming about the day we’d meet T together, and I just knew in my heart it would happen for us all – and so I had to go to uni that day so I was checking my messages every other minute of the day, and I got home in the afternoon and had a nap because I was physically exhausted LOL. Next minute I realise its nearly 6pm and I was getting ready for dinner, and out of nowhere, my subconscious mind decided that I’d click on my twitter app, which I genuinely barely EVER touch these days - I hadn’t touched it in days, but somehow my mind told me to click on it in that moment, and the second I logged in there was one new message, and there it was. I screamed so loud and started shrieking, running over to mum and dad and yelling at them – they were very very excited because I’d told them about the girls getting one that morning!!! I couldn’t believe they’d sent it via twitter as my main account is tumblr and I was expecting it to come from there but hey then I realised how shifty Taylor is and she probably gave them my twitter because its in my tumblr bio (!!!!!!) (TN don’t follow me on twitter either). They asked for my details in the message. Anyway so it hit me that night that I was officially meeting Taylor anytime in the next 2 weeks or so and I remember proper crying in the shower that night (I never cry properly like I just don’t do it?!!!!) because it was just a shock and it couldn’t have come at a better time honestly and it all just hit me so hard. So anyway the next day I was writing my notes for uni and at about 1pm, I got a call from a New York number and I knew instantly it was TN. I think it may have been Sierra but I honestly can’t remember LOL so the first thing she said was “I understand this may be a bit of a flight…” and in the moment I was like ‘yeah no Sydney or Melbourne is nothing for me’, expecting the event was to be held in Australia LOL, but the next thing she said was “So there’s actually going to be an event in the Los Angeles area on Sunday” and I straight away said “wait you mean this Sunday?!!!” and she said “Yes like in 4 days Sunday, yes in Los Angeles, now I know this is a lot and you may not be able to come but at this stage there’s nothing else on the cards, and we do have your details now and we can send you some things in the meantime” so I said “okay okay can I just call you back so I can sort some things out, can I please just call you back” and she was fine with that and so I hung up and told Mum instantly and then called Dad and he was so happy for me that he was already helping me look up next day flights! So low and behold, within the hour, I ended up booking flights myself and getting in contact with the girls so we could sort out similar flight times and hotels etc, and TN called me back and I told them it was a ‘go’ and that’s the story of how I was suddenly about to fly to LA with one days’ notice to meet Taylor Swift LOL. So basically I had to spend the next few days making up (very) lame excuses to you guys online as to why I wasn’t posting at my usual times and it was the hardest secret I will ever have to keep OH. MY. GOD.

 Arriving in LA

So Friday morning LA time I arrived and met up with the girls straight away at the airport luckily, and we made our way to our hotel. Of course because we were all on a 13+ hour flight, we missed the release of ‘Gorgeous’ and we knew we had to learn the lyrics before Sunday LOL so it was on repeat for 48 hours straight and we were loving every moment of it. We had an amazing 2 full days exploring LA and doing fun things, knowing how excited we were for Sunday’s adventure!!!

Meeting Taylor

In no time it was Sunday the 22nd October, aka the day we were meeting Taylor Swift in her LA home. (!!!!!!) We had to go out shopping in the morning to find a frame for B’s painting she was doing for T, and then we probably spent the rest of the day in the hotel with ‘Gorgeous’ on repeat getting prepared to actually get ready LOL. By 12pm we started doing our makeup and hair because we didn’t want to rush the process or anything, and honestly soon enough it was already 3.30pm and we were downstairs taking photos and vlogging, about to hop in an uber to take us to the meeting spot (!!!!!!). So we get there and walk inside to where TN directed us, fill out some details and get our wristbands (!!!!!) and suddenly I recognise this girl with dark hair and a stripy dress, and I just kNEW straight away it was Bella aka @swiftful-thinking13 but I had that fear it wasn’t so I waited a bit longer to properly check and it was DEFINITELY her LOL so we were all kind of standing in a circle and I just looked at her and went “Bella… Bella… BELLA” and she dead set looked at me in complete and utter shock for god knows how long (there were no words coming out I kid you not) and so then and there we both ran into a hug and she basically started crying, saying “THIS IS BETTER THAN MEETING TAYLOR SWIFT I CANT BELIEVE YOU’RE HERE IN LA WTF MY DREAMS HAVE COME TRUE I LOVE YOU” and literally until we actually got on the shuttle she was in disbelief and none of us could quite believe what was happening LOL (I knew ALL ALONG she was gonna be there, may I add, I KNEW it).

This is a pic of Bella and I basically as soon as we met!!

Anyway among all this chaos, someone informed me that @ohkimani just rolled up and I legit stood up, looked around and went “KIMANI” and there she was in front of me and yeah that was casual, considering I was supposed to meet both these girls in a few months time when I’m back in LA!!! So we took some photos, had a good chat, and I also met Paige!! ( @heypay ), and waited around until it was time for us all to get on the shuttles to the ‘secret location’.

Kimani, Bella and I!                             

 It was about 6pm or so when our group got on the shuttle after a security check, and I sat next to Bella, while B and G sat right behind us, and we spent the entire ride basically holding each others hands crying, knowing that we were minutes away from Taylor Swift’s house (!!!!!!). So we roll up to her place, the gates open and it felt like I was in wonderland in that moment, I’m telling you it was indescribable. We had to have another body check when we got off the shuttle, and we were then told to stand against the wall. On my way to the wall, I saw what looked like her guest living area all lit up with about 20 candles sitting around a bench LOL, and then there was an archway next to the wall to the backyard that was surrounded by fairy lights!!!!!!!! So in the few minutes we waited for everyone to get off the bus, we started hyperventilating and going into panic mode like I think I said to Bella about 20 times in a row that I wanted to turn around and leave because it felt fake and I got so scared suddenly that we were about to be in Taylor Swift’s presence (!!!!!!!!). 

Anyway soon enough I think it was Erica who escorted us through to the backyard, and into the pool area where the first group were mingling. All the food was set up on tables around the pool area and I just about lost my entire soul in that moment…. It was like a scene from a Hollywood movie like her location is divine!!!! and just sitting around her pool eating her food was a feeling I could never ever ever describe to you…ever. I had a plate with hommus and carrots because a lot of you know I can’t live without hommus LOL, and I had some olives, a REP cookie, REP m&m’s, a sushi roll thing, chips, and of course, a SMART water hehe. When we went to sit down by the jacuzzi, ‘Fire Away’ by Chris Stapleton started playing, and Bella and I just looked at each other in disbelief because in that moment everything was perfect, and we were listening to such a chilled, country song as the sun set in the most beautiful way over LA on a warm autumnal night at Taylor Swift’s house. It was there that I think we both just cried, like we’d met for the first time at Taylor Swift’s house and we’d already felt like best friends and it all came full circle, and I looked at B and G and went, guys this just isn’t real, its not… how did we fly here, I can’t believe life right now. That moment is a memory I’ll treasure forever and I truly could not have felt more content with my life – everything felt perfect. So we were waiting until the other groups arrived, and suddenly I saw Tree turn up so I went over and while she was chatting to other people, @teardropsonsmyguitar came over to me and said “OH MY GOD I KNEW I RECOGNISED YOU OH MY GOD EMILY HEY” and I was like oh my gODDD girl, remind me your username again!!!! And she told me and I knew it was Kaitlyn straight away and she told me I was beautiful etc and just about cried then too because I felt closer than ever to everyone there even though I was oceans away from home! Finally Tree turned to us and she said “So where are you guys from?!” and B, G and I said together “Australia!” and she goes “wOW WOW oh my GOD what part?!” and we said Gold Coast and she was so enthused and ecstatic for us and then I asked her how her cat is going and she told us a cute little story and it was adorable hehe and then we spoke more and she had to go and check on something and left. I also finally got to meet my Aussie gal @screamedsooloud and her sister during that time and we were talking about the fact that none of us knew if any other Aussies were gonna be there and omg Dani is truly as funny as you see online LOL. 

Anyway soon after, we were escorted back up to the house, into a small living area with candles lit everywhere and soft pillows/blankets all over the floor. I was so mesmerised by everything that I wasn’t paying attention to where B and G were and suddenly they said “EM, come over here!!!” and I turned around and saw a red chair with speakers either side and I knew EXACTLY where homegirl was about to be sitting, so somehow we ended up smack bang at the front of the room, less than 1m away from the chair. We then spent a solid 10 minutes screeching and crying to each other, knowing Taylor Swift was about to sit less than a f*****g metre away from us for 2 hours (!!!!!!!!!!!!). So yeah all of a sudden, there was commotion at the back of the room, and Taylor Alison Swift appeared through the curtain, and the whole room turned into madness and hysteria holy christ, but no apparently that wasn’t enough – two of the HAIM sisters are right behind her, as well as Jack Antonoff, Ruby Rose, Jessica Veronica (I think), Ash Avignone, and someone else and the whole room went into riot (!!!!!!) Taylor made her way to the front, hugging some people along the way, including B, to which T said “YOU MADE IT!”, knowing we came from Australia (????!!!!!!!). So there we were, less than a metre away from Taylor Swift herself, trying to act like we were somewhat alive in that moment. She looks very different in real life I found I don’t know she just looked so beautiful and perfect in every way and she was wearing high waisted camo pants with huge boots and a long sleeved black crop with her curly hair and red lips!!! I won’t talk now much about what happened in that room, but I WILL say I had a dance party with her and she came over to us and fully had a proper dance sesh and it still just felt like a dream. Throughout the playing of the album, she looked at me so intently so many times that I felt like I had to look away at times because she truly does stare into your soul like its mesmerising WOW. Anyway when (my now favourite song) was playing, I started crying instantly and I saw that she was watching me at times, and by the last verse, Bella, me, B and G had all lost it, laughing and crying at each other, having the absolute time of our lives, and T watched us, smiling and miming the lyrics to us the whole verse and that was by far probably the happiest moment of my life, it was just a feeling you could not put into words – it meant everything and it couldn’t have been more perfect, she made that song extra special for me and I’ll have that memory to hold onto forever. We also fully bowed down to her like you actually would to Queen Elizabeth, because hey she IS a queen, and it was so funny LOL. 

Once she’d kinda finished up with that part of the night, she told us she had to go de-sweat and freshen up because that LA heat with 100 of us in a small room was really getting to everyone and so we kinda mingled and went for a bathroom rush to freshen up ourselves before we started the meet and greet/photo opportunity. We went to what was probably her guest bathroom, as the house is still in renovation and there were actual notes on the wall saying ‘wallpaper’ etc like it was legit in mid renovation so it was exciting to know that she told us we were the first official ‘guests’ in this home?!!!! And then we got back into the room and mingled while people started forming a line to the next room where she was about to take photos and meet us! It was probably about 45 minutes later, after lots of crying and talking and general disbelief, that we were about to walk over and hug Taylor Swift – ‘Malibu’ by Miley Cyrus was playing right before we met her and I could not have been happier I swear. 

Brittany went over first and she hugged her so tight, and then T looked at me like ‘HEY!’ and we hugged (absolutely magical hugs they are), and then G hugged her. The first thing I said was “okay so we got told on Thursday and booked next day flights over here” and she said instantly “look I still can’t believe you guys made it like I can’t believe it WOW!” and then I think we spoke a bit more about it and she said “so Ali texted me before saying ‘The Australians are here!’ and I was so excited and I can’t believe you’re actually here!” And B said something like “of COURSE we’re here we wouldn’t miss it!!!” and then I think we must have taken the photo and I was like “Can I hold the Grammy” and she was like “uhhh yeaahhhhhhh” and I asked her which Grammy it was to which she said “1989 AOTY” and so there I was holding her latest Grammy in her house, just casually. I gave it to B to hold, and then held it again on the throne that we sat on in the photo LOL, and she gave G the phone from the LWYMMD music video that she danced with earlier LOL. So we all sat down and then T leaned in from the side and I think she put her arm around B and before I could even orientate myself nicely they’d already taken the photo LOL so I’m worried how that will turn out…. So then we all spoke a bit more and I asked her how the cats were and she said “yeah they’re doing really well at home now, although they did have a fight today” and she showed me the scar on her finger LOL, and then she said “but Meredith’s been so good lately, she’s been behaving and she even purred” and I think I just laughed and said ‘yeah purring’s always a good sign’ or something stupid, and then I complimented her black sparkly nails and she pulled them out towards us and said “aww thanks, do you like them? I did them today!” and then we must have said again that we couldn’t believe we were really there and she said “guys I just cannot believe you made it, thank you so much” and then the girls walked away because everyone seemed to go as a group first and then allow each person to have a one on one with Taylor. So suddenly it was just me and Taylor and I think the first thing we did was get a photo and so I said “okay what should we do” and she was like “I don’t mind, whatever you want” and so I quickly said “lets just hug” because I always wanted a cute hugging photo so we just locked ourselves in a hug, and JUST as the photographer was about to take our photo, they had to walk away and change something, so in any normal situation I thought T would let go and just wait, but she LITERALLY KEPT HUGGING ME in that position and I nearly died I was in shock but also felt so loved in that moment and I said “oh my god you smell AMAZING” because we were literally THAT close her scent was fully rubbing off on me and she smelled DIVINE like my gOD !!!!!! And she said “awww thanks” and then I think we finally got our photo, and then started talking more. The first proper thing she said was “oh my god I LOVE your dress so much, wow, its like perfect for like a more important, special type of occasion, like a first date, you know what I mean?!” and I just lost it then wow. I think after that I mentioned how thankful I am for all the tumblr friends I’ve made and how supportive we are online and she said something like “awww yes it’s the most beautiful thing” and then I mentioned Akhila ( @smilingswiftie ) and how she told me she was meeting T beforehand and then I realised I probably shouldn’t have told Taylor that so I quickly said “don’t worry, I kept the secret!!” and she turned back and cackled LOL I found it pretty funny and then she ACTUALLY SPOKE ABOUT AKHILA and said “oh my god she’s so pure and adorable and I didn’t want to let her go” and I said “yeah she’s so beautiful” and then I mentioned how Mere  ( @lifeofswiftie89 ) had mentioned Jess ( @jessicaswiftie1989 ) and I (my OG group chat) at the RI ss and she interrupted and said “ah Meredith with the cats” and nodded and said “yeah yeah” before I finished Jess’s name and she fully knew them as she apparently did when Mere mentioned Jess and I to her (?!!!!!) so yeah that happened and she knows a LOT of people I tell you… And then I think she was just standing there and I remember looking up and saying “you’re GORGEOUS” because I wanted to sneak in the ‘gorgeous’ reference LOL, and she stepped back and did that cute little smile of hers and said “thanks GORGEOUSSSSSSS” just like she sings it in the song (!!!!!!) and then I probably said for the millionth time that I couldn’t quite believe I was there and she said for the millionth time “I can’t believe you’re here thank you so much for coming!!” and then she had the AUDACITY to say so casually like so casually I almost died, that “you were on the list ages ago, I’m so sorry they took so long!” and I think I just laughed in shock and went “well I can’t BELIEVE I’m here, thank you so much” and then I think she hugged me again and we said our goodbyes and it was B and G’s turn to speak with her. I got my merch bag and Ali wanted me to wait for the girls because they wanted to interview us about coming all this way…. And then soon enough we were escorted out the side door and back onto the bus and I basically wanted to cry then LOL and so that was the story of how I flew 13 hours across the world with 3 days notice to meet Taylor Swift in LA with my 2 best friends!!!!!!!

Timing really is a funny thing, and it all just so happened at quite honestly the most perfect time ever. This year I have felt more confident than ever, and most content with myself and my life and I feel like the best things happen when you’re at your best and that’s why meeting her when I did couldn’t have possibly come at a better time – just know that good things come to those who wait, and you’ll know when you know, I promise. Never ever ever give up. 

And so to end the story, on October 22nd 2017, this happened:

thank you endlessly from the bottom of my heart for the opportunity of a lifetime, and for giving me a memory I will NEVER forget as long as I live, Taylor, you’re truly the best there is :’)

To the birth of a new era

Fandom(s): Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming GEN: Tony Stark & Peter Parker, May Parker & Tony Stark Summary: Somewhere along the way Tony Stark’s schedule aligned itself to Peter’s own academic calendar. And while that was both exulting and nerve breaking, it also made Tony want to take a step back to reevaluate how he got there in the first place. Not only that, but he couldn’t help to worry about the future.

Tony Stark never wanted to admit it, but the world would eventually need Spider-Man more than Iron Man. (And he was scared for that day to come, for Peter to bear the world’s flaws and misguided problems.)

Prompt Used: Peter’s birthday, Peter invites Tony to a school event @petertonychallenges Words: 2,035 Ao3 or ffnt

In a sense of self preservation, Tony had managed to even his breathing in hopes that his decisions in life hadn't fully sunken in just yet. Or brushed against the unraveling sense of anxiety filling his body. Not that he had even the time to recover his feelings to see the damage and occurrence that left him in a conscience ordeal. One that made him feel even more of a failure of having to be a witness of his own spiral life and its chaotic indifferences. In any case, Tony had no other choice but to agree that he did leave behind too many loose ends and in sub-consequence made more susceptible destructive debris loitering around his troubles.

Whether he had been informed by the world or by SHIELD, Tony Stark’s own personal responsibilities had become everyone's background noise.

After years of cementing his status and influence Tony had still found that the limelight was still a bittersweet victory and pillar. Because, in one end he still had the world at the palm of his hand, and another, Tony was still an instrument to his own plans. Getting wrapped up at the world’s own problems had never sat well with him. Not because he didn't particularly hate the attention of being a superhero gave him (he always did appreciate a good photo session) but rather, because Tony had not seen himself as a proper person to be labeled as a Hero of any kind in the first place.

He had been referred to as the merchant of death for a grace of time to change a majority of past opinions that quickly.

He gave the younger folks some benefit of doubt when they encountered and adored his new attached name of Iron Man. The youth had always been more adaptable and nimble with their choices. Yet, that had not made him approve of their support because in the back of his head, Tony had always been afraid. Of being casted away when one-day Iron Man would be yesterday's old news and he would be laid off as a forgotten old disappointment from history.

In that kind of fickleness charging his views, it made him weary of Spider-Man’s initial introduction and passage of being a vigilante and overall friendly neighborhood superhero.

Iron Man had been the first hero to the modern world since Captain America was abruptly put to sleep back a few decades ago. Years after him and Tony’s own personal hell of never being good enough to appease his father had crafted him to simpler conclusions. And that was, that being a superhero had never been his intention. Nor had it ever been something he would have predicted would stumble into his resume or self-introduction.  

It came with backlash, hypocrisy and ongoing worship mindlessly humming when he created the suit and eventually revealed himself in that same breath of chaos ensuing his public life. That was why meeting Peter Parker and in turn, also meeting the beginning of Spider-Man had made the pit of his stomach to drop further. The kid had started too young. Still too naive to see how the world (but mostly humanity) corrupted everything it touched. It was if Peter was a small child that had never gotten over playing dress up on Halloween. Peter had created his costume and name a few months prior of meeting Tony Stark, while at the same time, he had made his own brand of cult followers before Tony officially stepped in to help.

And while Tony had done his best to integrate Spider-Man’s life with Iron Man by default, there had still been too many loose ends etching into his nightmares. Ones that already buried his already crippling addiction to caffeine when he couldn’t find time or peace to sleep. The kid wasn’t even his own by blood, but that hadn’t mattered when he took in all sides that Peter Parker showed him. Tony Stark had been pulled in by his boyish charms, Pepper and Happy too with the way they all loved seeing Peter come out of his shell and bravery as he welcomed their light teasing and companionship they endowed him.

His constant upgrades to Peter’s suit were a testament of his underhand fear of losing such a bright light and mind.

Tony had already messed up too many times. Like a long lifetime of screwing up his own adolescence to his eve of being Iron Man. It basically made him exhausted that he had lived a life of nothing but cynical values and horrible coping mechanisms reaching deep inside his soul. Peter had become a sort of clasp of hope in his life. The boy who was the opposite of him. It genuinely scared him at how attached and awestruck the kid was to him, because that meant that Tony had to tread carefully.

Because if he said something wrong again, or did something it would be on him. The Vulture had gotten too close. Their government was taking notice and Tony was feeling like a father.

It was getting real.

Too much that Tony Stark had to reel himself in a panic stride to his lab in hopes of being alone in his thoughts. The cool metal and rumpled clothes he had on were all he could focus as he started mindlessly tinkering. The music blasted his ears and just like that, his worries muffled within his body. In mid turmoil and with FIRDAY still speaking clearly and going along with his random conversations he started was what made his tension leave in slow breaths. He still wouldn’t be completely okay with Spider-Man being dragged along with the Avengers’ crap but for now, he was grateful that he was Peter’s backup.

For now, mentoring Spider-Man and giving Peter, a legitimate internship would be on his agenda. Because when he thought about that kid, he always remembered the sincerity in his words when he described his desire to help the little folks. The righteousness was unparalleled, that was why it always made Tony want to be better.

Not only for himself but for Peter as well.

(The kid deserved that much at least, if not more.)

Rising at mid-morning had always been a dull echo. The aches in his back, the coffee that was ready for him to consume and the simple routines of FRIDAY helping him start the day was all the same. Pepper would be annoyed but when he didn’t have a scheduled early meeting he had the right to wake up whenever his brain felt like getting up. It was one of the few perks he had for being a billionaire genius. The only thing that subtly changed the cycle was the addition of Peter. It started leisurely and almost undetectable in the way that Peter’s school calendar and pre-arranged events were combed over to FRIDAY’s knowledge.

It had become a surreal kind of epiphany that blazed into Tony’s core.

The month had been faring better than usual and after his three hours of sleep and coffee almost done from his cup FRIDAY had informed him of Peter’s birthday and science fair was coming up soon. It had been just a simple schedule rundown. The one that came with him looking at his tablet as he usually poked around his to do list and picked the ones that felt more pressing or entertaining.

“Can you repeat that again.”

Her voice again repeating the two things that shook him: 1. He for a second forgot birthdays existed. 2. He almost forgot about Peter’s offhand comment and low-key invitation for him to coming to see his school’s science fair.

Sometimes he really hated how real life had made a mess of his previous life lessons. All that bitterness and self-doubt had meddled with his sleeping routines. Its effects had him imploding him to race through his passing memories to pick up anything concrete to dissect. He had to give Peter something good—scratch that, something better than perfect. An object at least that had a sentimental message for the kid. But that was the problem.

He was out of his element. Tony had all the money in the world but he usually never gave proper gifts. (That had been Pepper’s job.) Now he was stumped.

Teenagers had always been a handful angsty shits. (He’d been there and done that phase.) Yet, Peter wasn’t an actual normal teen. The kid had better morals than most of his peers all combined. He was selfless as he was generous whether he wore the suit or not. That was what made it tricky for him to figure out what he could give him that didn’t seem too redundant or overly pricy to make Peter feel uncomfortable about repaying him for his generosity.

(Which was stupid because Tony was a billionaire who ninety-nine percent of the time didn’t really care how much money he blew off because he could afford it. That and Peter deserved to be pamper after all the shit he had to put up with for being a teen vigilante.)

He knew that both Ned and MJ (the girl that Peter had started to mention more often) were all going to give him gifts that revolved to Star Wars or something close to that realm. Then there was his Aunt May that would be giving Peter something probably really sentimental from his late uncle. Either way, Tony was at a loss of where he could venture. He ended up throwing a large pile of crumpled paper balls into a trash can after he had a long session of brainstorming. It entailed of him pulling at his hair and dunked a couple of cups of coffee for the rest of the morning and first hour after lunch.

Strangely enough it had been May that opened to him one random afternoon when she was calling if he wanted to meet up with her before the science fair started so they could both greet Peter together.

“I thought you hated me.”

He had remembered at how angry she had been when she saw Peter wearing a custom-made Spider-Man costume that had screamed Stark technology from a mile away if anyone was really paying attention. And May Parker had always been scarily observant on occasions that needed it. Peter had mentioned that trait a couple of times in passing when he babbled about his family life.

“I disliked all of the possible scenarios of him getting hurt running through my mind when I saw him in that suit. But I do appreciate the time (the suit upgrades) you are giving him.”

An air of acceptance passed on to Tony as he gripped his coffee mug. He kept looking at the screen of May’s contact name on the screen. On the other line May kept talking.

“You are a part of the family, you know.”

In the background, Tony almost dropped his mug when he couldn’t help but suppress a shocked gasp. It went unnoticed as she kept talking about how Tony was doing good for Peter since Ben’s death. She described how painful it had been to see Peter a couple of months ago when the accident had been still fresh. How he had shut down and dropped most of his school activities before he started to come home late. When he got the ‘Stark internship’ May had seen another layer of happiness that brewed into her nephew.

Something that had been obviously been due to Tony’s sudden guidance. There still had been some instances when May had been skeptical but she had always found herself to always be proud and supportive for Peter. That was why she took the time to speak to Tony now, with Peter’s birthday and science fair coming around the corner. He needed to know that while May would always be paranoid and worried (for good reasons) that she would be there for either of them. No matter the time and place.

Because, that was what it meant to be a family.

“So then, what do you think I should get or do for the kid then?”

May’s chuckle only made him feel more hopeful as he heard her suggestion.

Educated By Tara Westover Amazon

Imagine you were born and raised in a family with radical religious beliefs. And imagine you didn’t have a birth certificate until the age of 9 and were not allowed to go to school until 17. Would you be able to muster the strength to earn a Ph.D. from Cambridge? “Educated” by Tara Westover reads as if a barely believable novel. And yet, it is a true-to-life memoir. So, get ready to relive a life stranger than fiction – through the eyes and heart of a fascinating firsthand witness!

Raised by Mormon survivalists

Tara Westover was born in a small Idaho farming town, the youngest of the seven children of Mormon survivalists Val and Laree Westover, hidden under the pseudonyms Gene and Faye in the book. Due to the beliefs of the couple, Tara was born at home, and she was not issued a birth certificate until she reached the age of 9. Until then, there was no way for anybody outside of her family to know she had been born at all: Gene and Faye had decided to live in isolation after the 1992 Ruby Ridge incident, in which federal agents ambushed and gunned down a woman and her 14-year-old son for, at worst, a minor offense.

Even before that event, Gene had firmly believed that public schools were just a way for the socialist American government to brainwash individuals into obedient slaves of the system, which is why neither Tara nor her six siblings ever got a proper chance to experience education. Gene didn’t believe in hospitals either, meaning Tara’s concussions or burns over the years were treated with herbs and home medicines. On the other hand, Gene did believe in a Mormon God, and this god (like, unfortunately, most other gods) didn’t seem to be that fond of women, proclaiming their place to be in the house – which is where Faye was all of the time.

Skip to main content.ca. Tara Westover grew up in the same era as Vanilla Ice, 'Beverly Hills 90210,' 'Saved by the Bell' and MC Hammer but apparently none of those other 'book learning' kids in town mentioned this. Pretty much the only pop culture references in the book involve Ralph and Alice Kramden. Tara Westover grew up in the same era as Vanilla Ice, 'Beverly Hills 90210,' 'Saved by the Bell' and MC Hammer but apparently none of those other 'book learning' kids in town mentioned this. Pretty much the only pop culture references in the book involve Ralph and Alice Kramden. Harrowing, near-fatal accidents appear in what to seem to be. Buy Educated: The international bestselling memoir 01 by Westover, Tara (ISBN: 021) from Amazon's Book Store. Everyday low prices and free delivery on eligible orders. “Like The Glass Castle, Educated is a wise and deep reflection about surviving one’s family. I bow down to Tara Westover, not only for her marvelous, sentence-by-sentence craftsmanship but also for making sense and meaning from a confounding and hair-raising childhood.

Tara’s grandmother wanted her youngest granddaughter to get a proper education, so one day, when Tara was 7, she offered her a chance to escape to Arizona and go to school. Tara, however, stayed. To nobody’s surprise, really, not even hers. To this day, she claims, she has very fond memories of her childhood. In view of what followed, that is somehow hard to believe.

Opening doors to the world

At the age of 10, Tara’s mindset changed abruptly. It happened when her 18-year-old brother Tyler, the third son of Gene and Faye, announced one day his intention to go to college. Gene, of course, objected to this choice, both because Tyler’s older brothers Tony and Shawn were not around the house anymore to help and because, well, he believed that going to school would not teach him how to support a wife and a few children. However, Tyler persisted, and this inspired Tara to start reading a bit more, mostly the New Testament and the Book of Mormon.

Soon after Tyler left, Tara’s older sister Audrey left the house as well; and the only ones who remained were Luke, Richard, and her. Due to the lack of helping hands, Gene had to move away from farming and Tara had to help him. So, already at the age of 11, she was scrapping old cars for parts. However, she felt that she could do better, so one day, she posted a flyer at the local post office, offering her services as a babysitter. This opened her up to the world.

One of her clients, a woman named Mary, offered Tara an opportunity to visit a dance school. Tara enjoyed the experience very much, but her father soon forbade her to go anymore, believing that dancing inspired immodest and unfeminine behavior. By then, however, Tara had started taking voice lessons as well, and these were something even her father could find nothing wrong with. Especially after they helped Tara impress the congregation at their local church one Sunday. In fact, she was good enough to even get a part in a play at the local Worm Creek Opera House. More importantly, she was starting to enjoy life.

It’s the end of the world – as we know it

As far as Gene was concerned, Tara’s 13th birthday should have been her last. Not because she had done something to drive him mad, but because it was supposed to occur sometime during September 1999, about three months before the end of the world. A Mormon survivalist, Gene believed that on January 1st, 2000, all the computer systems in the world would fail and that there would be no electricity or telephones anymore. Everything would sink into chaos, he claimed, and this would usher in the Second Coming of Christ.

English philosopher Thomas Hobbes once said that there exists nothing worse than a man believing to have had a revelation, since no argument would convince them of the opposite. Not even if reality invalidated their beliefs. Psychologists call this cognitive dissonance, and we all suffer from it. In the case of Gene, the problem was far more severe than it is for the rest of us. Case in point: even when the end of the world didn’t arrive with the year 2000, he didn’t change his beliefs. He just changed the dates. Even so, his worldview was visibly shaken, so the family finally left Idaho for Arizona to visit Tara’s grandmother.

On the way there, the family’s van spun off the road and crashed into a field. Everyone survived, but Tara was badly hurt, even losing consciousness for a while. That did not matter one bit to Gene: as far as he was concerned, curing Tara was a job for God and Nature, not for doctors. Fortunately, even though Tara’s neck frequently locked up on her for a while, the accident didn’t leave any permanent damage. Even her neck got back to normal, eventually.

However, untreated head injuries not unlike Tara’s probably contributed to the very unstable condition of her brother Shawn, who continually abused her and her sisters. Prone to violence and as fanatic as his father, he once violently attacked Tara, waking her up from her sleep and dragging her by her hair from her bed. The reason? Tara had started wearing makeup and spending time with a boy named Charles. In Shawn’s opinion, this was not an appropriate behavior for a 15-year-old girl. Gene’s reaction? A little short of, “Way to go, son!”

College, finally

Encouraged by her brother Tyler, at the age of 16, Tara finally decided to take the ACT test, a standardized test used for college admission in the United States, not too dissimilar from the much more well-known SAT test. Tara failed the test, scoring 22 out of the 27 points she needed to get into Brigham Young University (BYU), a Utah-based university entirely owned by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints – that is to say, the Mormons.

Considering the fact that she barely knew any math, it wasn’t such a bad score; however, she was devastated. It took her some time to recuperate and a lot of help from her mother to figure out algebra and geometry. The effort was more than worthwhile. When Tara took the ACT again, she scored 28! Everybody was happy with the result, except for her father, who didn’t want to let Tara go. His reason? God had told him personally that Tara would greatly displease the Almighty if she ever went to college.

Even so, Tara decided to throw all caution to the wind and three days before her 17th birthday, she left for BYU. It wasn’t long before she started experiencing culture shock. For example, one of the first things she noticed there was that her roommate Shannon wore pants that had the word “Juicy” written on them. In an act that seemed blasphemous to the teenage Tara, her other friend Mary even dared to shop on the Sabbath!

The classes were challenging and scary for Tara. She took English, American history, Western civilization, religion, and music. As you might guess, she didn’t have many problems with the last two, but she had quite a few with everything else. The history she had been taught at her house was very different from the history being taught at university, and the whole idea of Western civilization seemed as strange to her as Einstein’s theories of relativity would seem to a novice in physics.

Just one quick example. One day, she asked her professor what the word “Holocaust” meant. The professor thought she was joking and scolded her. She wasn’t, of course. Her father had talked at some length about the Boston massacre and the Ruby Ridge incident, but he had never mentioned the Holocaust. So, Tara believed that, at worst, it was just some small conflict that very few people would really know about.

The education of Tara Westover

The Holocaust incident didn’t discourage Tara. On the contrary, she started studying harder and, after overcoming the initial issues, she eventually sailed through almost all of her exams, Western civilization being the only exception. Not wanting to leave any gaps in her knowledge, she didn’t back off. So, eventually, she aced that exam as well.

But that was always her philosophy. It wasn’t, “Stay away from things you don’t understand,” but rather, “Where trying doesn’t work, try again and try harder.” Consequently, even though she had come to college to study music, she kept signing up for history and politics classes. Her professors noticed her enthusiasm, and one of them referred her to a study-abroad program at the University of Cambridge.

Tara applied and, soon enough, she was headed to King’s College, Cambridge, to study a course under world-renowned professor of European history, Jonathan Steinberg. Just a short time prior, she didn’t even know what the word “Holocaust” meant and now Steinberg, a Holocaust expert, was supposed to grade her words and ideas. Amazingly, he had only nice things to say about them, telling Tara that her final essay was one of the best he had ever seen in his long career. Because of this, he promised to help her with her graduate application.

And that’s how Tara managed to win the Gates Cambridge Scholarship, only the third BYU student to achieve this feat in the long history of the university. After enrolling at the prestigious Trinity College, Tara became a celebrity back in Idaho and was revered by almost everyone who had ever known her. Everyone except her father Gene and her brother Shawn, that is.

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Family troubles

Everything was going well after Tara returned to England, this time as a graduate student. So, well, in fact, that Tara began feeling as if she was a new person, one who was allowed to drink coffee and wine, and even tell stories of her fabulously strange upbringing. However, back at home, things were stranger and darker than ever.

First, Gene suffered an accident which almost killed him and left him with severe burns all over his body. Even so, he refused medical help and, once again, stayed alive against all odds. Then, Tara received a letter from her sister Audrey, in which she informed Tara that she was planning to confront her parents about the abuse she suffered from Shawn. Tara stood by her side and went back home to testify in her favor.

However, Gene and Faye were left unconvinced by the claims of the sisters, even though Shawn had explicitly threatened to kill them in their presence. To make matters worse, he repeated the threat to Tara by phone, not long after ceremoniously hugging her during the peacemaking sessions with their parents. Simply put, he was beyond treatment.

The same could be said of Gene, who, as Tara learned at one of her psychology classes, suffered from a severe case of bipolar disorder, which was getting worse by the day. On the bright side, while Tara was in England, he had started a line of medicinal oils with Faye. The business brought them local recognition and a lot of money. It also brought them a lot of interest from big companies. One of them offered Gene $3 million to buy the recipes. Gene declined the offer.

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The meeting of the two Taras

Tara’s trips back to her family opened her eyes to a strange discovery: that there were now two Taras. One of them was the respected student of a prestigious university, and the other the lost daughter of a couple of Mormon survivalists. Gene and Faye loved the old Tara much more than the new one and they were trying to get her back at all costs. However, it was the new Tara who was really experiencing life, and the one who was starting to understand the world.

Among other things, the new Tara realized that she had been lied to all of her life about one fundamental thing: the real value of women. “I loved the fiery pages of Mary Wollstonecraft,” she writes, “but there was a single line written by John Stuart Mill that, when I read it, moved the world: ‘It is a subject on which nothing final can be known.’ The subject Mill had in mind was the nature of women. Mill claimed that women have been coaxed, cajoled, shoved and squashed into a series of feminine contortions for so many centuries, that it is now quite impossible to define their natural abilities or aspirations.”

Educated A Memoir Book

Soon after, Tara began reading more about Mormonism, but this time she read with a much more open mindset. It didn’t take her long to realize that, compared to almost many other intellectual and religious movements, Mormonism was downright radical. She decided that she didn’t want to remain an adherent. Quite the opposite: she wanted out.

The triumph of the new Tara

One day, while Tara was doing research for her Ph.D. at Harvard (where she had won a visiting fellowship) her parents appeared at the doorstep of her dorm room. The reason was that Gene had had another one of his revelations. This time, the angels had told him that Tara’s soul had been taken away by Lucifer and that the only way for her to save herself from Hell was by accepting his blessing and by coming back to her hometown.

Everything Tara had worked for – as she writes at this crucial place in her memoir – had been to acquire for herself just one simple privilege: to see and experience more truths than those given to her by her father, and to use those truths to construct her own mind. “I had come to believe,” she goes on, “that the ability to evaluate many ideas, many histories, many points of view, was at the heart of what it means to self-create. If I yielded now, I would lose more than an argument. I would lose custody of my own mind. This was the price I was being asked to pay, I understood that now. What my father wanted to cast from me wasn’t a demon: it was me.”

This was a price she wasn’t interested in paying. Even though she suffered a mental breakdown in the process of severing the ties with her family, she eventually persevered and opted to finish her thesis instead. The breakthrough came one seemingly ordinary day, when, looking in the mirror, Tara realized that it was time for her to bury her old self in the past. “The decisions I made after that moment were not the ones (the old Tara) would have made,” she writes. “They were the choices of a changed person, a new self.” Tara says that different people might use different words to describe this new selfhood: transformation, metamorphosis, falsity, betrayal. She chooses to call it an education.

Final notes

There are really not enough superlatives to describe “Educated.” Alluring, courageous, heartbreaking, heartwarming, beautiful, propulsive, best-in-years, one-of-a-kind, fascinating, extraordinarily evocative – these have all been used by different reviewers. And all of them quite justly.

Book Review Educated

A unique memoir, “Educated” seems almost too strange to be believed. And yet, despite its singularity – as one Vogue reviewer has noted – the questions Tara Westover’s book poses are universal: “How much of ourselves should we give to those we love? And how much must we betray them to grow up?”

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To quote the Sunday Times, “Educated” is a book “fit to stand alongside the great modern memoirs.”

12min tip

Be curious. Research. Contrast and compare. As Tara Westover learned, the only way to create an authentic self is through the evaluation of many ideas, histories, and points of view. Everything else is dogma.

Being Married to Jeonghan...

ok so imagine being married to Jeonghan

I imagine him to be a super dorky husband

and a lil cringey too lol

like he’d wake you up in the mornings with a kiss

or a boop on the cheek

he’ll keep poking you until you wake up annoyed and you’re like “ughhh jeonghan let me sleep” 

and he’s like “good morning lol” and plants a kiss on your cheek 

aaaaand he’s already made your morning

the two of you would probably make breakfast together since its kinda your thing

like you would alternate days on who gets to pick the meal for breakfast

“i want pancakes”

“nooo jeonghan its my turn to pick we’re having waffles”

*pouts*

he ends up loving the waffles and wants to make them everyday and it starts to get old and you’re like wHY 

anyways

you two would always reserve weekends for dates

you two do all sorts of things

like go to art museums or gardens or parks

or the typical movie and dinner

but its always an adventure with jeonghan

like when you went to the garden for a date

it was his idea to take aesthetic pictures of each other

and boy did those photos look amazing

you two looked beautiful among all the flowers

and for your birthday

Jeonghan pretended to forget and you being your naive self really thought he did lol

but before you could get all sad and stuff jeonghan surprises you and hands you a collage of all the aesthetic pictures the two of you took that day.

you cried i mean i would too because its freaking jeonghan being a sweetheart

and as he hugged your crying form he did that classic jeonghan smile and it was so pure

sometimes you two would get into deep late night talks

and it was really comforting to know that you both could rely on each other to be shoulders to cry on

one night the deep talk somehow got to the topic of kids

jeonghan admitted he kind of felt scared about being a father

and you’re like don’t you have a bunch of kids already aka 17

he’s like “yeah but that’s different”

“what about Chan?”

“true but you know like a kid from me and you”

cue a blush from you

he blushes a lil omg so cute

and you’re like “i guess we’ll have some whenever we’re both ready”

and he’s like “are you ready?”

“...yes”

“whoa really????”

“yeah and I think you’ll be an amazing father. You’re just underestimating yourself.”

he thinks for a bit and he’s like “sure why not lol”

that was an aju nice night

soon you figure out you’re in fact pregnant

jeonghan kind of fangirls

“OIWEFSNKNRGJ IM GONNA BE A DAD”

“YOU WERE TERRIFIED TO BE ONE LIKE TWO MONTHS AGO”

now that you’re pregnant jeonghan is more protective of you

he tries to look out for you as much as possible making sure you’re safe and well

sometimes he’d make the members look out for you

one time you went to victoria’s secret cause you thought you grew a little bigger

and you saw the best sight ever

chan awkwardly standing and being surrounded by all these bras and panties and a blush spreading across his face

you burst out laughing in the store and everyone stared and once they saw who you were laughing at they stared at chan

chan: i uh um *runs out store*

you tell jeonghan what happened and he dies laughing too but remembers to remind chan not to be awkward and that he is always his first baby

a few months later you find out the baby’s gender

its a girl!!!

both of you freaked out in happiness

jeonghan wanted to go baby shopping after that appointment

you guys ended up buying a bunch of cute smol baby clothes

and a crib

you two basically bought an entire nursery

jeonghan suggested the nursery be painted rose quartz and serenity

and you’re like hell yeah

and that nursery is the most aesthetically pleasing nursery ever omg

then the baby shower came

all the seventeen members were invited of course

they made the event fun and there was even a karaoke machine with all of their songs

 you’re like i love this song

ahem

so they brought gifts

Seungcheol bought a car seat. what a responsible dad

josh got a smol seventeen onesie aww

jun got a mini version of that carrot costume he wore on ofd omg

soonyoung got a cute lil hamster plushie with 10:10 eyes and said its supposed to remind the baby about her fav uncle

wonwoo got a smol version of that plushie with glasses that was supposed to be him in aju nice era and said that the baby will end up liking this gift over soonyoung’s

jihoon got a soft blanket with seventeen’s logo on it with a matching bib along with a seventeen poster to hang up in the nursery

seokmin got a bunch of baby toys so the baby would never be bored and stay happy like him :)

mingyu brought a bongbong plushie that was probably about the same size as the baby once she was born! 

minghao bought a mini kermit like that keychain he has along with a smol baby sized sunglasses. he told jeonghan to make sure she dabs in them

Seungkwan got a baby t shirt that said “seungkwan stan”

hansol got a stitch stuffed toy

chan got a onesie that said “jeonghan’s baby” to clarify that he is not his baby when in fact his own daughter is

you gushed at all the gifts so much that your hormonal ass started crying

“aww dont cry (y/n)!” said jeonghan as he hugged you

the members copied jeonghan and you all ended up in a giant group hug

you were so thankful though 

then the day finally came

your water breaks!!

you’re like uhhh whAT DO I DO

so you scream for your husband

“y/n what happened?”

“uhhh my water just broke???”

“oh. OH!”

you two make it to the hospital and you felt like you were dying

so you decided to take it out on jeonghan

you squeezed his hand so hard you were surprised when it was still attached to his arm afterwards

anyways your daughter finally arrives!!!

yay!!!

and jeonghan is smiling but tears are flowing down his face

it was a beautiful sight

a tiredly attractive crying smiling jeonghan holding his tiny newborn daughter for the first time

you cried too

then the baby cried

but omg you both fell in love with your daughter

you two agreed on naming her (d/n)

and seventeen fanboyed when they saw her for the first time

jeonghan was so protective omg he would make sure they were holding her right 

the nurse took a family photo and even one including seventeen

those two pictures are framed in (d/n)’s room!

when you both came home jeonghan didn’t expect to lose so much sleep

he’s normally sleepy af and he’s even tireder with his beautiful daughter screaming at 3 am

he’s a secret gentleman so he tells you to go back to sleep when she starts crying

just because you two are parents doesn’t mean everything you used to do is on hold.

you started continuing date nights after (d/n) was a few months old and trusted seventeen to babysit her

you and jeonghan always took family photos

and the both of you were obsessed with your daughter

matching family outfits happened often

one date you two decided to go to the aesthetic garden and recreate the aesthetic pictures except this time you each held (d/n)

and for jeonghan’s birthday you gave him a collage similar to the one he made you except it included the updated pictures with (d/n)

he was so happy omg

overall a happy marriage

you two ended up having another kid and it was a girl this time too!

the both of you watched them grow up 

aww

and as time passed, you and jeonghan loved each other more and more each day

honestly jeonghan is the cutest husband

and funnest

god i love him