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heeliopheelia · 9 months

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"do you regret last night?" (heeseung x reader)

genre: smut, light angst word count: 1k requested by nonnie ♡

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

warnings: unprotected sex, mentions of cheating, pet names

a/n: okay guys i actually love how this one turned out!! i thought the last hee smut drabble was my favorite but i think i like this one even more!! ALSO the grammar mistakes are probably horrifying in here bcs i still struggle with past tenses and that's the reason why i dropped writing in them a long time ago 💜 so when it comes to past tenses – i kinda use them how i feel like it rather than using some actual knowledge... does that even make sense... PLEASE BEAR WITH ME, I SWEAR I'M NOT DUMB

masterlist

"F-Fuck, Heeseung, yeah- Just like that."

All it took for Heeseung was to see you standing at his door, soaked thoroughly with rain and eyes puffy red. It was all he needed to instantly know that his best friend – and simultaneously your boyfriend, has finally fumbled and fucked up your relationship once again.

He let you in without any questions, holding the door open for you as you toed off your wet shoes and walked inside with head shamefully hung down. After bringing you a towel for you to dry yourself a little bit, the explanation of your sudden appearance flew out of your lips in a wobbly mutter as another wave of tears streamed down your cheeks.

Biting on his lip harshly, Heeseung considered each and every assassination attempt plan on his best friend who's decided to cheat on you again after you so generously gave him a second chance two months ago.

He remembers your first heartbreak like it was yesterday, easily recalling the disbelief painting all over your face as you watched your boyfriend walking out of the bathroom with some wasted chick following him like a lost puppy. And all of it happened on Heeseung's birthday party too. All he could do back then was to watch the girl of his dreams run out of his door, heart broken and left on the floor only to be stomped on by dozens of feet.

So this time, he decided he's not going to be as helpless as he was then.

Somewhere in between sobbing and laughing at Heeseung's poor attempts of joking to make you feel better, you've found yourself straddling his hips and assaulting his lips with yours vigorously. Then you circled your hips over his, hands slipped underneath his shirt just to rip it off of him eagerly; all of it only to end up sprawled out below Heeseung on his bed sheets, head thrown back as your voice gets choked up again.

"Yeah? God, I'm gonna fuck you so good, baby," he breathes out heavily, lifting your hips even higher to pound into you harder, making you feel every inch of him hitting so deep inside of you. "'m not gonna stop until the only thing you're able to say is my name. Promised to make you forget about him after all."

He did. And you nodded eagerly at his offer, letting him kiss the tears away from your face couple minutes ago. Too swallowed up with hurt and lust to even process the urgency behind his words. Too swallowed up with hurt and lust to notice the lovesick gaze in his eyes as he looked down at your flushed face.

Your fingers tremble as they tightly wrap around his wrists that are placed on each side of your head, and you whine pitifully as he bullies his tip in and out of your soaked folds. Heeseung flinches slightly when he feels a cool metal brush over his skin and he looks down to notice a promise ring resting around your pretty finger – the same one he helped your boyfriend pick after the two of you had gotten back together.

Before the anger has the chance to boil the blood in his veins again, he swipes his gaze to your fucked out face again, scoffing with amusement. Never stopping his thrusts, he gently grabs your hand and lifts it up to his lips, his mouth engulfing your entire finger only for his teeth to grasp on the silver band and pull it off of it. You watch, almost mesmerized, as he turns his head to the side and spits the ring on the floor to get lost somewhere in between the rest of your discarded clothes.

"You're not gonna need it anymore," he says, a smirk crawling up on his pink lips. "You deserve so much better, baby. You know it too, don't you?"

You nod your dizzy head, hands desperately reaching out to grab at him and feel his toned body underneath your fingertips again. With a firm grip on your hips, Heeseung pounds into you ruthlessly as the sound of skin smacking fills up the room entirely along with your moans and whimpers.

He reaches one of his hands down to rub on your swollen clit as he feels you getting closer to your finish. The sudden touch makes your body jerk in his arms and white paints your vision soon after, and just like he promised, all that you manage to do is repeat his name over and over again.

"S' fucking good, Heeseung," you whine out, head rolling back into the pillows and back arching sharply when his hips speed up. "Don't stop!"

He presses you back down to the mattress and hooks one of your legs over his middle, burying himself even deeper into your clenching pussy than before and nearly instantly bringing out an orgasm out of you. Your jaw slacks as your body squirms slightly underneath his larger frame, hands loosening their grip on him and falling limp on the sheets as you're overwhelmed with the warm bliss.

You're barely in your right mind when you hear his low groan and seconds later his hot release is thickly spilling on the soft surface of your stomach. Your heavy eyes watch as Heeseung reaches to his nightstand and pulls out a couple of tissues to wipe you clean. With his soft stay, please and your tired thank you, you fall asleep with your face buried in the crook of his neck.

The anxiety that's been slowly building up inside of you doesn't let you rest for too long though. You barely open your eyes, clock striking 7 am, and the hesitant thoughts and worries flood your mind.

It didn't mean anything to him. He was just trying to help you out. You get attached to people way too easily, silly girl. You should probably get out of here before he wakes up and things become unbearably awkward. Fuck, why is your heart feeling so heavy all of a sudden?

So you leave his apartment quietly, fixing your disheveled self as you walk to the nearest coffee shop you can find. And just as you collect your order from the counter, you feel your phone buzzing in your pocket.

The large smile can't be kept from spreading on your lips as you eye Heeseung's message with butterflies tickling your stomach from the inside.

do you regret last night?

And the answer is as clear as a day in your mind, so with eager fingers you type out a a reply.

are you crazy? never.

we should do it again soon <3

permanent taglist: @bambisgirl @arizejkt19 @luvmura @milisabunny @cathy-1997 @satoruskitchenrag @ramenoil @jenjnk @jaylaxies @yoongspi

#enhypen imagines #enhypen x reader #enhypen smut #enhypen hard hours #heeseung smut #heeseung imagines #lee heeseung x reader #heeseung hard hours

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dashofmonsters · 5 months

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Dreamers & Delusions- Pt. 5

merman x female reader

It's been a couple weeks now since you and Tao had started your fake dating situationship thing. He walks you to and from work as often as he can and invites you to his home more and more.

You end up hanging out with him most days and are rarely at your grandmother's except to sleep or get ready for work. On the days you don't have work and don't want to go to the beach, Tao has let you hang out at his rental. It was odd at first but you quickly got comfortable with it.

Today though, you couldn't get out of the house. The weather has gotten worse and it's been raining for two days straight. Yesterday you saw him while he was out grocery shopping, he looked a bit upset then. Over and over he kept asking if you'd be okay but you'd told him you'll be fine.

Now, you're not so sure.

It's only been two days but your grandmother hasn't shut up.

"Your looks will only last so long. You should consider doing something that will keep him on his toes. Maybe try to freshen up your wardrobe," your grandmother rants from her recliner.

"He's not interested in stuff like that. I mean he dresses like uncle Rob when he's out mowing the lawn for fucks sake. Merfolk don't care about that stuff," you roll your eyes as you fiddle with your phone.

You hear your grandmother scoff.

She wasn't quite onboard with you "dating" Tao after she found out he was a merman. She kept complaining that it would be difficult to have a normal life together and what would your kids look like. It's been never ending with her on that front but now she's back to you.

"I'm just saying, what if he does get bored with you? You'll at least be ready for someone else," she states.

"Just shut up! You don't know jack shit! No wonder you're fucking alone! Do you hear yourself," you snap at her. You feel like you should feel bad for what you just said but you don't.

Your grandmother rises from her recliner and stomps towards you with a foul glare.

"I took you in you ungrateful little bitch. Day in and day out I let you come and go as you please and this is what I get? I took pity on you because of that piss poor excuse of a daughter of mine... But I can see the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree," she seethes, spitting on your face.

Thunder roars outside and shakes the house. A flash of lightning and the power is off. You can still make out the miserable shape of your grandmother in front of you. You can still hear her breathing impatiently, undeterred by the darkness.

"You're right, the apple didn't fall too far from the tree. My mom's a fuck up who lost her husband just like you did," you spit back to her.

Your cheek stings suddenly and you realize your grandmother has slapped you. Again and again, three... four times she hits you before you grab her wrist and shove her away.

"Fuck this," you holler, stomping away from you grandmother and down the hall.

You can hear her yelling at you, cursing you and your mother. But you ignore her as you pull the door open. The rain is coming down in sheets and although it's noon, the sky is almost dark as night.

Slamming the door behind you, you take a few careful steps down the stairs and bolt across the empty street. The walk to the beach is slow but you don't care. You just want to be there, you want to feel the wind as it whips off the waves.

The rain stops for a little bit, slowing to a sprinkle as you step onto the drenched sand. Your shoes get stuck a few times till you decide to just take them off. Little by little you make your way to the life guard tower. The rain picks up again as you climb up and curl into a ball against the back wall.

Your stomach drops and you hold yourself as you start to cry. You hate feeling like this, you hate that every time you fight with your grandmother you let her get into your head.

You feel nauseous and tired, drained from yelling and running in the rain. You just wanted a fresh start away from your hometown. You wanted a better life, an easier life, but everything has been getting difficult lately.

The heaviness of the rain lulls you to sleep as you curl up with a damp beach towel you found in the tower. You're shivering cold, but you're to tired and eventually you drift to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tao:

I haven't been able to shake this horrible feeling since I woke up this morning. I dragged myself out of my tank earlier than usual and showered off. The hot water helped me clear my head as it has been every morning.

I cannot stop thinking about my dear friend and more often then not I fall asleep with her on my mind. Sweet dreams usually follow and I wake up angry at myself for thinking of her too much.

Today is different though, the shower helped long enough for me to dry off and make it to the kitchen before I started thinking of her again.

I've let her into my home so often so she can avoid her grandmother and little by little she's left bits of herself here. A jacket that I have hung next to my own by the door. A couple of her books that I've skimmed through but found it too licentious to finish. And her crown from the night we shared with the pixies.

I have placed her crown in my nest room for a reason I cannot understand. I have fallen asleep with it in my hands almost everyday. Three days ago I had thought I lost it and nearly ruined my home looking for it. I was ashamed of myself when I found it in one of its usual spots in the room.

I felt horrible that I let my thoughts of her consume me so, but today it's worse. So much worse. I feel dreadful and not because of my thoughts of her. Something deep inside of me is uneasy and restless.

My kitchen is in a state of chaos after I make breakfast, an unusual sight for me since I clean as I go. I eat quickly and quietly but I am unable to finish eating. I feel sick and I almost double over when I start on the dishes.

Bile bubbles up in the back of my throat and my chest feels heavy. That horrible feeling explodes and suddenly I find myself racing to the door.

The rain is coming down hard and I can hardly see anything in front of me but I make my way down the wooden steps. I freeze in my tracts once I get to the bottom.

Something feels off, wrong and twisted.

I allow myself a moment and another as I realize my instincts are coming alive. I sniff the air again and again until I smell it.

It's faint but it's undeniably her scent.

The rain would have washed it away already unless she has left the safety of her home.

I start running then, running for dear life towards the beach. The horrid feeling I had was for her all along, for the safety of my only friend and shoal mate. I had ignored it for too long, I just hope that I'm not too late.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

You startle awake from the loud thunder clapping. The rain had gotten worse as you slept. The clouds have darkened and the wind has grown stronger. The tower groans as the wind assaults it every few minutes.

Groggy and cold and wet, you try to find another beach towel to wrap up in but you find none. You try to consider your options but your mind is so tired and you're becoming a bit anxious with the storm getting worse.

You decide then to make an attempt to get to Tao's home. You'd be safe there and far away from your grandmother.

Step by careful step you make it down the tower and your heart stops at the view in front of you. The waves are hitting the beach harder and fast. The tide is high and you're a bit too close to the water than you're comfortable with.

You look around and decide that if you can get to the houses on the other side of the beach you can worm your way through that neighborhood to his house.

Slowly and ever so cautiously you step forward. You have to balance yourself as the wind is constantly threatening to knock you down. You're teetering closer and closer to the waves as you walk towards the houses. You keep trying to walk away from them but somehow manage to find your feet right back in the water.

You're halfway there when you hear something behind you but by the time you turn around it's too late. You're knocked out almost instantly and you fall hard and fast. The waves lap at your body, slowly pulling you into the ocean.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tao:

I race up and down the beach trying to find her, my body fighting to transform under the heavy rains. I sniff the air again and again but the scent has drifted. No, it's drifting...

My heart stops as I look out into the dangerous dark waters.

I sniff again, hoping I'm wrong but I'm not.

I sprint towards the waves and jump as high and as far as I can into the ocean. I dive in and within second I smell her... I smell her blood.

I force the transformation and swim as fast as I can towards her scent. This storm will have no doubt invited several unwanted predators to this area and if they have smelled her blood...

Something heavy rams into my side and I reel back as I see a bull shark charging towards me. I harden my fist using what magic I have and punch the creature on the snout before electrocuting it. The shark shakes its massive body and tries to attack again.

I haven't the time for this.

Not wanting to kill an innocent creature, I use my magic to disrupt the currents and have the shark swept up in them.

Quickly I swim away and try to follow the scent again. It's getting further and further away but stronger. She's loosing blood and fast.

I push myself more than I ever had before and swim until I feel like my lungs might give out. The scent of her blood becomes so strong I can practically taste it.

Grinding my teeth, I move faster until I see her limp body bobbing in and out of the water. I quickly surface and see her loosely hanging onto a plastic trash bin. I quickly pull her into my arms and look around us.

I can hardly see the beach from here... She was pulled so far from land.

Gathering my strength I swim hard towards the shore. I have to be careful and keep her head above the water, it's not easy. I would give her gills like I did the night we danced with the pixies but she's not awake for it. I have to shift her ever so often as the waves threaten to pull us under and I have to use an immense amount of magic to keep the currents steady.

I almost panic when she slides out of my arms and I have to quickly swim back for her. I pray to the goddesses for the first time in a long time that I make it back to the shore with her alive.

By the time we reach land the sky is truly dark. The wind has died down and the tide has lowered. I pull her and myself up, breathing heavily as I lay us down. I look at her and I feel a mix of pain and relief. She's breathing but she's hurt.

Blood trickles down her head and there's a gash on her leg where her pants have been torn. I work fast to bring myself back to my human form. It hurts like hell forcing it and I grit my teeth. I am motionless for a few minutes after my tail has split into legs. It burns worse than ever after swimming so hard.

I shake as I force myself to stand and carefully scoop my friend into my arms. My muscles ache but the gnawing heavy dread I had felt has subsided a great deal. Holding her close to me I begin the long walk back home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's warm and quiet when you finally wake up. You're sitting on a bench covered in towels with a space heater next to you. You tilt your head back, a searing pain making you wince.

You gasp, a wheezing noise leaving your mouth. You hear someone running towards you and you feel their warm hands on your face.

"Thank the goddesses, you're finally awake," Tao says.

You can only tell it's him by his voice, your vision is still blurry and your head hurts so bad.

"Why the hell were you at the beach," you hear him yell.

You try to open your mouth but it's dry and tastes like salt. Your head lulls to the side and your blurry vision becomes slightly clearer. Tao is kneeling before you, his hands move from your face to your shoulders. He grips you and you wince, everything hurting.

"You were over a mile away from the beach when I found you! You could have been killed! For... Fucks sake you were covered in blood when I found you! Were you drinking that vile human alcohol again? Why would you go out and do something like that," Tao shakes you, still yelling and unable to control himself.

You limply raise your hand a plop it weakly over his arm. You mouth a few words begging him to stop as you begin to cry. Your voice is hoarse and your throat sore but you manage a few dry words.

"I'm sorry... please Tao... Please stop... You're hurting me," you cough and are nearly out of breath from just speaking.

Tao stops shaking you and loosens his grip on you. His hands fall to the bench before snaking around you and pulling you closer to him. He rests his head on your lap and you feel him shivering.

"I thought I had lost you... I couldn't find you and when I did... You were so far away and unconscious. You were just floating there while bleeding out. Why were you there... Why," Tao holds you closer, his nails digging into your skin.

You cough as you try to speak but it's no use. You keep coughing and coughing so hard it hurts. Tao quickly scoops you up and brings you to the kitchen where he gently sets you on the counter. He brings you a large glass of water that you chug down. You're still coughing but it doesn't hurt as bad as it did before.

Tao takes your cup and refills it and as he hands it to you, you start crying again.

This day keeps getting worse and worse and you just want it to end. First the fight with your grandmother, then you get knocked out and dragged into the ocean, and now Tao is mad at you.

A part of you wishes that you stayed lost at sea. That you might have finally found some peace and everyone would probably be better off without you. That thought consumes you till you start weeping in earnest.

"Fuck," you hear Tao curse and then you hear something break.

You begin to shake even as Tao wraps his arms around you. He holds you, not too tight but close enough that you can hear his heart beat.

"I'm sorry, please stop crying. I just-," Tao tenses up and you hear his voice crack. "You're all I have, please be more careful... please."

You hear what he's saying but you're too tired, too hurt to really register any of it. He keeps talking, his voice calming down but the words are lost on you. The pain you feel on your head is dulling but draining. You keep going in and out and Tao keeps talking.

There's a loss of heat for a moment, your eyelids too heavy to peel open to see what's going on. You feel yourself being lifted and walked somewhere. Something warm and soft is wrapped around you before you're set down on something even more soft. You limply nestle into it before allowing sleep to claim you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tao:

I pace in my kitchen for what feels like hours. I am feeling too many things at once and I cannot sort them properly. My friend is safe and fast asleep in my nest room. Her injuries were not deep but there were many. I cleaned and bandaged what I could without having to strip her but I fear I might have missed a few cuts and wounds because of that.

Her words play over and over in my head, when I asked her what she was doing at the beach. In my rage I yelled at her, again. In my desperation I accused her of being drunk even though I realized too late I didn't smell any alcohol on her breath. I have made a terrible mistake.

She might resent me now, might even fear me. She's already afraid of sharks and my mer half is similar to that creature. She was terrified the first time she touched my tail. What if she's still terrified of me but doesn't say anything?

Rage swells in my heart for what I have done, for hurting her and making her cry. I look down at my hand, my knuckles are torn after punching the wall and the skin on my fingers are slightly cut.

I am not good enough for her... I've hurt her...

That anger quickly dies down and is replaced with a gnawing sorrow. I slide to the floor and grip at my hair while grinding my teeth. Three, no four of my front teeth pop out from how hard I bite down. I spit them out and wince as I feel the back row shift forward.

This pain must be my punishment for what I have done. I must beg for forgiveness when she wakes up. I cannot bare the thought of her being afraid of me, it hurts too much.

I sit and center myself as I shed the front row of my teeth and spit them out little by little. I am covered in blood and I feel horrible. A new back row will grow in a day or two causing more well deserved pain. It will serve as a reminder of what I've done. For now though, I am tired and my shoal mate needs me to watch over her.

She ran to the beach for a reason. I was too enraged to hear her out and too impatient to let her heal before speaking.

I clean myself up and quickly change into something warm before heading to my nest room.

My friend is sleeping soundly but with tears sliding down her cheeks. I carefully place a hand over her forehead, she is cold. I have wrapped her in a large towel since she is dirty and too tired to change into anything.

I pause and try to think what she would even wear. My clothes are large and one of my shirts would fit her like a short dress. I imagine it for a moment and inhale sharply. It would be the only thing I own that would fit her and it would cover just above the knees. I slap myself for thinking of her like that.

She is my friend, she is my shoal mate, you are not good enough for someone like her.

I chant that over and over again but the more I do the more it feels like a lie.

What if I could be more than just a friend to her, what if I am good enough for her, what if she could be my-

I stop that last thought. It would be too good to be true if she could be more than just a friend, but to be my mate or my fated mate? I would pray to the goddesses everyday for the good fortune of allowing me to meet her.

But that is not the case, no matter how much I wish it.

I carefully step around her and lay by her side, gently pulling her into my arms. Hearing her breathe settles me and I feel myself purring. I chuckle remembering how I reacted to her talking about that. I know talking about purring is embarrassing but I never questioned why until after that day.

She has made me question myself, question my upbringing, and my kin more often than not to the point that I'm not sure who I really am. I've allowed myself to be defined by what I am and where I'm from that I don't know who I am. She mentioned once that she hates being judged by her work and family and I'm starting to understand that.

I hope that tomorrow I can make amends with her so that we can talk and learn each other more

~~~~~~~~~~~~

You ache everywhere when you wake up. Your head in pounding and your stomach makes an angry growl. The lights are dim when you open your eyes. You're surrounded by plush pillows and blankets that smell freshly laundered. You suddenly realize that you're in Tao's nest room.

You try to sit up but every fiber of your being is screaming in agony. You groan in pain and wince when you touch your head. Everything starts to slowly come back and the last thing you remember is Tao wrapping you up and carefully laying you down.

A cough forces its way out until you're having a fit. Your throat is on fire, dry and sore. You hear heavy foot fall and suddenly you see Tao. He helps you sit up and brings a cup to your lips. You slowly drink, some of the water not making it into your mouth.

Tao holds you as you catch your breath, the dryness in your throat has subsided but it's still sore. You loll your head till you're looking up at him and whimper a quiet apology. You feel Tao's grip on you tighten before he carefully lays you back down.

"No, it is I who should be sorry. You are injured and exhausted and I had yelled at you, again. I made a horrible accusation and expressed my anger about what had happened when you're already vulnerable and cannot speak. I am ashamed of myself," Tao admits, his voice despondently.

You limply pat his hand, "As long as you're not mad at me or hate me we're good."

Tao takes your hand in his and lightly squeezes it, "I will never hate my friend but I am upset that you put yourself in danger. What were you thinking?"

"I wasn't," you say then cough. "I was running on pure emotions and spite. I-" you cough again and again into another fit. Tao helps you drink once more and tells you that you can talk once you're better.

But you ignore him, needing to get this all off your chest.

"I got into another fight with my grandmother. She was being a class A bitch about some shit and then she brought you into the conversation and I lost it," you explain, clearing your throat afterwards.

"So you ran to the beach in the middle of a storm," Tao asks dryly.

"Like I said, wasn't thinking. I just wanted to get way from her and my feet just took me there. I stayed up in the guard tower where I passed out, emotionally exhausted and when I came to, I decided to make my way to your place," you say, pausing to let Tao help you drink some more water.

"I don't know what happened but the next thing I knew I was bashed in the back of the head! I came to a few times when I was being dragged further from land... I remember getting scrapped up and screaming from the pain. I probably passed out again afterwards. Then you found me. You saved me," you can't help the tears that start coming on then.

As you cry you start to remember being helplessly dragged miles away from shore. Too sore to move and terrified that you might drown or become fish food. You screamed so much your throat became raw. You remember your leg being torn by a rock and being whipped against a buoy so hard your back bruised immediately. Everything hurts and feels sharp and dull all at once. Worst of all, you're starving and your tummy is not being quiet about it.

"What is that sound," Tao asks.

"My stomach... I haven't eaten anything since the day before my grandmother and I fought. So it's protesting and-"

Tao quickly sets you back down and scrambles out of the room. You hear chaos unfold from the kitchen and before you know it he's back with an armful of snacks.

"Please eat these while I go cook you something warm," is all he says before rushing off again.

He's deposited the snacks in front of you, all of them being your usual favorites that you munched on when you hung out here. You always brought them over and never really stored any here. You don't want to think too much into it aside from him practicing to be a good mate to someone else. You'd get your hopes up for no reason otherwise.

You happily tear into a bag of chips and chow down. Three bags of chips later Tao returns with a large bowl of soup. It smells so good your mouth starts watering.

Tao helps you sit up and piles a few pillows behind you. You reach for the bowl only for Tao to move the tray with it on his lap.

"You're shaking too much, I'll feed you," Tao states.

You glare at him for a moment and then at yourself, "Fuck."

"Eat and then I'll take you to the bathroom so you can bathe yourself and clean whatever wounds you can or I couldn't get to," he says, scooping some soup up and bringing it to your lips.

You take a bite, trying not to be awkward in this situation, "What wounds? And I don't even have a change of clothes what would I even wear?"

Tao makes you take a few more bites while he mulls over your question. He's clearly uncomfortable about something an it shows as plain as day.

"Tao, let's not be weird about this. We're both adults buddy," you say after finishing another amazing bite of soup.

"I didn't get to the wounds on your back or thighs since... since touching or getting to either spot would have been highly inappropriate," he answers, looking away from you though.

"Ok, I appreciate the chivalry but what if I had a really really bad injury on either spot of I don't know some weird fish venom you would have had to strip me and I would have been alright with that. I trust you dude and not once have you creeped me out," you tell him.

He finally looks back at you and the whites of his eyes slowly turn black. "I do not feel worthy of such trust my friend, not after what I did."

"Well guess what, you have my trust regardless of loosing your shit and rightfully so! You were scared, I get it. You don't have to keep beating yourself up over it," you reach out and lightly pat his arm.

"Are you certain? I hurt you and yel-"

"I said it's fine, jeeze! Water under the bridge. Forgive and forget. Less sadness, more soup," you pat his arm again and make a face.

Tao chuckles and shakes his head, "How is it that you're torn up and still as talkative as ever."

"My mouth doesn't have an off switch man, I could ta-"

Tao shoves a spoonful of soup into your mouth.

"I do believe I just found the off switch for that mouth of yours," he grins.

You swallow hard and as mad as you feign to be you can't help but to laugh, "Ya got me, feed me good food and I shut right up."

With that Tao feeds you another bite but it's a bit much and some of the broth slides down your chin. Before you have a chance to clean it off, Tao wipes it off with his thumb before cleaning it off with his tongue. Your brain blanks out for a moment and you feel your cheeks heat up.

"I uh think I'm getting full... Don't want to eat too much in one sitting," you try to play it cool but your voice cracks and you want to crawl under a rock and bang your head against a wall.

"Understood, I can save the rest for when you're hungry again. I'll put this up and draw a bath for you," he nods before standing up.

Your stomach sinks when you remember that you have nothing to wear after you get out of the bath.

"Oh uh yeah hey Tao buddy, um I don't have a change of clothes so...," you start, making a few nervous and fiddly gestures with your hands.

Tao stops in his tracks and visibly tenses up, "Right, I uh... I put one of my larger shirts for you to wear in there. Unfortunately that's the only thing I own that would fit you so..."

There's an awkward silence between the both of you that is blessedly broken by a loud roll of thunder that shakes the windows.

"That's fine," you finally squeak.

"Alright," Tao nods.

"Ok then," you pat your knees.

You scream internally and beg the universe to help you not make this day any weirder and wilder than it's already starting out to be.

#monster boyfriend #monster x girl #monster x human #monster x reader #monster lover #merman #Tao the merman #merman x reader #monster romance #merman boyfriend #monster love #merman x female reader #monster boyfriend oc #monster bf #slow burn #slow burn romance

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fanatic-writers · 9 months

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Arms Tonite

A/n: Little Frank Castle drabble, one-shot, whatever you wanna call it cause I got this thought stuck in my head and couldn't get it out. Kinda fluffy, kinda angsty, I promise there's a happy ending.

Pairing: Frank Castle x reader

Warnings: Angsty angst angst, violence, guns, death, unedited

Word count: 1762

The rays of the sun flashed in your eyes, a familiar silhouette showing through. You didn’t know how you’d done it but you’d managed to convince Frank to have a picturesque almost Pinterest-level date. You were leaning back on a red checkered cloth. The picnic basket was empty with the food you two had shared over lunch. Your sundress rested just above your knees as you lazily looked over at your boyfriend. His eyes drifted to your thighs. “See something you like Castle?” You teased, his eyes slowly dragging up to your face. You never thought you’d get moments like this when you’d first met him. You knew his reputation, you knew his story. The two of you had been friends for what felt like ages before you’d managed to get up the nerve to ask him on a date.

“I-it doesn’t really have to be a date.” You’d stammered out after you’d asked him to dinner. Frank’s face was damn near unreadable as you looked at him until a small smile crept onto his features. “You wouldn’t be so nervous if you didn’t want it to be a date.” He teased you.

The clouds darkened out of nowhere, rain opening up as you and Frank scrambled to put everything back where it belonged. There wasn’t rain in the forecast for the day so neither of you had thought to bring an umbrella. Instead, Frank took off his jacket and held it over your head as the two of you ran for some sort of shelter from the downpour. A sense of déjà vu filled you as you both huddled under the awning of a nearby shop. You clung to his warmth, not really sure what the both of you were waiting for. The sky had gone even darker than it should have, the rain slowing to a stop as the clouds separated and revealed twinkling stars. You looked up confused before you heard Frank’s voice from the doorway. “You gonna come in or just stand out there staring at the ceiling?” He asked and you realized you were in front of his apartment door. You nodded, a bit confused before you walked into the candle-lit living room. “Happy Anniversary sweetheart.” Your brows furrowed once more, you’re anniversary wasn’t for another couple of months. You weren’t great with dates but you knew you hadn’t missed it considering you’d put it in your damn calendar. Then you realized how familiar it all looked, the candles set on the table, the white whine bottle waiting to be opened. “I know red goes better with spaghetti but-“ “But I don’t like reds” You finished for him, remembering your first anniversary like it was yesterday and not almost three years ago. Something was wrong, something was really wrong.

---

Frank had heard the gunshot before he could get to you. You’d called him, nervous that someone had been trailing you a couple of minutes ago. You were just a couple of blocks from his apartment and he had been jogging to meet you. He heard your scream and began to run and the moment he heard the gun go off he broke into an all-out sprint. Skidding to a stop in front of the darkened alley way he wasted no time putting a full clip into your assailant. Of all the times you’d accompanied him, put yourself into his battles, he never thought he’d lose you to some petty criminal trying to get whatever cash you had in your wallet.

He called out your name, dropping to his knees beside your body. You didn’t respond. Your body was still warm, and he could see the slight rise and fall of your chest but he wasn’t sure just how long that would last. He pulled you into his arms, finding your pulse before lifting your body up. “Stay with me sweetheart,” He murmured as he carried you to his van. You wouldn’t survive this if he didn’t get you to the hospital and quick. You’d both had your fair share of gunshot wounds but nothing you couldn’t walk away from before. Nothing he couldn’t patch up himself. He gently laid you down in the back before pulling out of the lot to his apartment, racing down the highway like a bat out of hell.

---

You sat yourself down at the table and the scenery around you changed again. You were at the café across the street from the hospital you’d worked at. Combat medicine had only lasted so long when you realized you didn’t have a taste for war. It had led you to a nice scholarship for med school though. You’d worked in Hells Kitchen once you’d gotten out. “Hard day?” Frank’s voice pulled you from your thoughts “I think I’m dying.” You murmured, more to yourself than him, or whatever your brain had conjured up as him “Glad to hear it.” You supposed your memories weren’t exactly programmed to change their dialogue to different responses than what they remembered. You took a deep breath and looked around you, trying to remember exactly when you’d been put this time. You’d always hear the whole life flashing before your eyes thing, but you never believed it. What you believed was that you could stop it, that you had to stop it. You couldn’t die yet. You weren’t ready and you sure as hell weren’t going to leave Frank behind to deal with losing another loved one. You looked across the street and tried to come up with something, anything. Maybe you could get out if you just picked the right door. “You wanted to talk about something?” Your memory of Frank seemed to be speaking on autopilot as you stood up from your seat at the booth and began to look around. You began to notice little gaps in things your brain couldn’t place, maybe that was how you got out. “Didn’t think you’d ever want to speak to me again after everything.” “I like to keep up with my patients.” You responded out of habit almost before realizing you were sitting across from him, getting sucked back into the memory once more.

You stood up once more, this time racing for the doorway to the cafe, determined to leave whatever loop your mind had put you in. As soon as you walked through the threshold you were met with the chaos of your workplace. Nurses bounded down the hall past you as a man was wheeled down the hallway on a stretcher. You hadn’t realized you were moving with them until a nearby nurse began to throw words at you. You couldn’t hear her, instead focused on Frank’s face and the handcuffs that kept him locked to his spot. Everything went quiet for a moment, a smile on your face and you realized the fluorescent lights in the hallway seemed to be getting brighter and brighter. Your body seemed to relax despite the panic that surrounded you as if telling you it was ok, that you could let go now. You just had to give in to the feeling of nothingness, to let yourself ignore whatever pain was beginning to sear in your stomach and building in your chest. You almost gave in, almost, but then your vision focused back on Frank’s face. The peace that came with the man being unconscious, the small details you’d recognized the first time you’d met him fitting into their places. No. It wasn’t ok, not if you weren’t with him.

You blinked your eyes hard, squeezing them shut and willing yourself to push through whatever the hell was going on with you. When you opened them back up you were sitting opposite Frank, still in the hospital. You got up from your spot and moved beside his bed. You were the main doctor in charge of his care when he’d come in. You’d meet Nelson, Murdock, and co not long after this since they’d barge in on you while you were treating him the next day. You ran through the motions of checking over his vitals, even though the scene before you was a memory you were still worried something would be wrong with him. You looked to the clock, he’d be waking up in a couple of minutes. You remembered the feeling of distaste for the officers that sat outside his waiting room, waiting for any little issue to arise so they could tack it onto his sentence, or better yet, for them, have an excuse to shoot him. It was your job to protect your patients, to protect people like Frank who had no one else on their side. You remembered thinking that even if he was an awful person it was your job to keep him alive long enough for whoever he hurt to get the justice they deserved. You slipped your hand in Frank’s giving it a gentle squeeze as the beeping of the monitor began to grow louder in your ears. “Somebody needs to shut that damn thing off.” You grumbled, feeling his hand tighten around yours. “Y/n?” The still-unconscious Frank asked and you froze. That was new. “C’mon baby pull through for me.”

Your eyes blinked open, once again met with a bright light and you almost panicked that you’d come so close just to lose your fight right at the end. You turned your head to the side, eyes still adjusting to the light. “Frank?” You’re voice was soft and as you adjusted the way you were laying you were made acutely aware of the pain in your abdomen. A wide smile pulled at Frank's lips and he helped you to settle a bit “Take it easy hun.” He mumbled as he looked you over. You took the time to examine his face, noticing the redness of his eyes and the way they had swollen ever so slightly. “Were you crying?” You asked. Your tone almost sounded like you were teasing him, not understanding exactly how severe things had gotten. Frank let out a huff, leaning onto your bed, his hand never leaving yours. “Your heart stopped baby.” His voice was almost a whisper, like if he spoke too loudly it would happen again. “I thought I lost you.” “Well, you didn’t.” You didn’t really know what else to say, the visions you’d seen in your time between life and death already beginning to fade from your memory. All you really remembered was fighting it. “I wouldn’t let them take me from you. Not now, not ever.”

#frank castle x reader #frank castle/reader #frank castle angst #frank castle fluff #hurt comfort #frank castle #frank castle fanfic #frank castle reader insert #punisher x reader #punisher/reader #the punisher #the punisher fanfic #mcu #mcu fanfic #mcu reader insert

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englishstrawbie · 11 months

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Prompted by RobinPerry_U2Fan1969 on AO3 - “If you asked me to marry you tomorrow, I'd say yes.... what about today”

>>>>>

Maya rests her head on Carina’s shoulder, re-reading the same page of her book for the third time. She gets to the end of the paragraph and realises that she hasn’t paid attention to what she is reading yet again. She sighs heavily and lifts her eyes to the top of the page.

“Maybe we should go for a walk, bambina,” Carina suggests.

Even she can tell that Maya isn’t really reading her book and figures maybe some physical exercise might help. They have been trying to relax all afternoon, since Maya woke up from her post-shift nap. They haven’t had much time together in the last few weeks, between work and visiting Jack in hospital, not to mention being a shoulder to cry on for their friends who are all dealing with some kind of loss. Carina worries that Maya is so busy taking care of everyone else that she has forgotten to take care of herself.

“Hmm? It’s raining,” Maya says without looking up. They can both hear the rain hitting the windows.

Carina is still getting used to the new Maya, the one who doesn’t automatically put on her sneakers and work out to manage her feelings. The treadmill has resumed its place in the apartment and Carina has been expecting to wake up to the sound of Maya’s feet hitting the belt. It took her by surprise a couple of days ago when she found her meditating on the couch instead.

She knows it is Diane’s influence, and Carina feels a surge of pride at seeing Maya continually working to do better, just as she promised. But she also doesn’t want Maya to hide the hard stuff from her, for fear of scaring her.

Carina puts down the journal she is holding and takes Maya’s book from her hand, smiling gently when Maya looks up at her with a small frown crinkling her forehead.

“Are you okay?” Carina asks gently.

“Yeah,” Maya says, although not very convincingly. “It’s just been a long week.”

“I know,” Carina says. “I stopped by to see Jack on my way home yesterday. Amelia says the swelling on his brain is starting to come down.”

“Does she think he’ll wake up soon?”

There is a hopefulness in her voice that pulls on Carina’s heart as she shakes his head.

“It’s too soon to tell.”

Maya’s face drops. “Oh.”

Carina reaches out and takes Maya’s hand, giving it a comforting squeeze. Maya wraps her free hand around Carina’s, playing with the wedding band on her left hand. It had been missing for so long and there were too many times that Maya wondered if Carina would ever be willing to put it back on. She had done it without ceremony, but Maya had noticed it straight away, her heart leaping at the sight of it back in its rightful place.

Carina watches her. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking about you in your wedding outfit at the ball. It reminded me about how happy we were the day we got married,” Maya says wistfully. “But it’s also the day that everything started to change. The day I started to change.”

“It makes you sad?”

“A little,” Maya admits. “But I don’t want to feel that way about our wedding day. Because I love being married to you. It's the best thing I've ever done.”

She twists her lips thoughtfully.

“You know, when I was at the hospital the other day to see Jack, there was a guy in the room next door marrying his girlfriend. I guess he was about to have a big surgery and didn’t want to waste another moment.” She smiles. “It made me think.”

“Oh yeah? About what?” Carina asks curiously.

“About what it would look like if we got married again,” Maya says. “We’ve had our second chance at dating and we’ve had our second chance at moving in together.”

“You want a second chance at getting married too?” Carina says, amused by the idea.

“Yes,” Maya says.

“Well…” Carina says, leaning in and kissing Maya’s temple. “If you asked me to marry you tomorrow, I'd say yes.”

“What about today?” Maya says.

“What?”

Maya twists her body and lifts her knee, resting her leg on the cushions beneath them.

“Carina DeLuca, will you marry me - again?” Maya says.

Carina chuckles. “Maya, you’re crazy!”

“Crazy in love with you,” Maya says, making Carina laugh even harder. “I’m serious!”

“When? Where?”

“I… I don’t know,” Maya says. “I just know that life is hard and shitty things keep happening – but I also know that, after everything that’s happened, you came back home. I love you, Carina, and I don’t want to waste another moment with you.”

Romantic moment prompts

AO3 may be down but thank goodness for tumblr!

#station 19 #maya bishop #carina deluca #station 19 fanfiction #my fanfiction #romantic moment prompts

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lulubelle814 · 7 months

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Just Dizziness - Chapter 23

Tom’s POV

Her waking up for a few minutes about two nights ago felt like a dream, but the doctors have since assured me it was not, going as far as showing me the data with timestamps saying she truly was awake. They recommended that I continue to read and sing more to her as the doctors show that she has more active brain rhythms. The hope, also, is that it may help her to wake up.

I’ve been reading a number of things to her from poetry to the book my mum brought, Lemony Snicket’s Beatrice Letters, one of which felt extremely fitting. I sense she brought it for that purpose specifically. While mum was here, she talked to her for a bit, telling her about our wedding. It was lovely hearing it told by her.

I’ve even been singing some of her favorite songs, telling her some of my favorite memories, especially some of our early dates such as when we randomly found each other during my run at the park that went from there to breakfast, to an amazing walk, back to the park for a picnic that ended with dancing in the rain. If she wakes up……….no, WHEN she wakes up, I will make sure to create another amazing date like that, one that will blow that out of the water. She deserves nothing less than that.

The only unsuccessful venture attempted was playing a bit of guitar. I tried it a couple of times, but the doctors said they couldn’t see any evidence that it was getting a response, but talking or singing to her was having at least some positive effect. They believe it’s why she started having waking episodes.

Mum came by again yesterday to check on us and see how she’s holding up. She’s been a lifesaver, taking care of Bobby, bringing a change of clothes. Emma and Sarah have been helping with Bobby as well and checking in on our place. They’ve been trying to tag-team to get me to go home for a night or two here or there, but I've told them that wherever my wife is, that’s where I will be.

At least until last night. Mum practically dragged me out of the hospital by my ear and made me walk outside around the hospital.

“She would want you to get some fresh air, and opening a window doesn’t count, Thomas. If it makes you feel better, you can change shirts and leave that one with her. That way part of you will be with her while you are outside looking at the bloomin’ sky for 15 minutes.”

Mum was a hard person to say no to. So that’s what I did. I changed into a black t-shirt, threw on a sweatshirt, and placed my blue sweater next to my wife. After asking the nurse to let me know if there are any changes, even something minor, mum practically dragged me to the hospital garden for a walk-a-bout. After about 10 minutes, I couldn’t stand being away any longer, and she finally let me go back. When I got back to her room, she had moved a little, but the shocking part was not only had she moved, but she was now wearing the blue sweater I left for her.

“I was just about to call you. There was a slight change in the monitor, but it didn’t last for long. We just found it.” I couldn’t be cross with the nurse. My wife was wearing my sweater, and it gave me hope, or was someone playing a horrible joke on me?

“Did anyone come in or out of here? No one moved her or put that on her?”

The nurse looked over. “No sir. No one has been in here since you and your mum left a few minutes ago. The only thing that’s changed is that variance on the monitor. The doctor will be able to tell you more when he’s back tomorrow.” Relief washed over me. Hope. This is definitely hope, and I prayed that she would wake up soon. It’s been about three weeks since the doctors sorted out the issue. They brought in a specialist, Dr. Shepherd, for the surgery, and he assured me that her brain activity looked very promising.

I’ve tried to help make this room as comfortable and homey as possible. My mum and sisters have helped bring pictures, clothes, and blankets from home. Friends have continued to visit as often as they can. Benedict even snuck in Bobby a couple of weeks ago, though I suspect the nursing staff turned a blind eye when he flirted with them while Bobby cuddled on the bed with her. It’s not hard to tell he’s been missing her almost as much as I have. Bobby started to cry when it was time to leave, but the nurse at the station let us know that as long as we kept it quiet, we could continue sneaking Bobby in here to visit. So he’s been a regular visitor as often as Ben could bring him when his schedule permitted it.

I couldn’t help but admire her, asleep and wearing my sweater. For a moment, it looked like she moved, maybe flinched? I moved closer, keeping watching, but nothing happened. Suddenly, it happened again followed by what sounded like a sniffle. Without further hesitation, I ran and enfolded her in my arms, my shirt quickly being soaked in tears.

Chapter 24

#tom hiddleston #twh #tomhiddleston #twhiddleston #damn hiddleston #hiddlestoners #thomas william hiddleston #hiddleston #hiddles #tom hiddleston fanfiction #tom hiddelston imagine #tom hiddelston x reader #tom hiddelson #tom hiddleston x original female character #tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston x ofc #tom hiddleston x you #just dizziness

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polikszena · 1 year

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Yesterday we visited the Eiffel Tower (it was absolutely amazing), and since today we had a trip to some castles in the Valley of Loire, we spent several hours in the bus, and I happened to write a fic in which A.F.C. Richmond goes to the Eiffel Tower. Here you can find a couple of snapshots about Richmond's visit. Sets somewhere after Season 3, Episode 6, but otherwise it's completely out of context. (And I haven't seen Episode 9 yet)

A lamppost with a publicist - Part 1

"A lamppost with a publicist, huh?" Ted Lasso burst out as he looked up at the enormous iron tower in on the other side of the road. He knew that it was an iconic building, but having it in front of his very eyes he felt a little overwhelmed by it. His heart even skipped a beat as he looked up at it.

"I wasn't serious about that, Ted," Rebecca Welton said, making the rest of the group look at her.

Leslie Higgins' mouth dropped open as he glanced at his boss. "You said what?"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Keeley Jones asked.

"This is the fucking most impressive building I've ever seen!" Roy burst out.

Coach Beard just shook his head, while Trent Crimm was curiously observing the scene, although the club owner could tell he was judging her as well.

"I can't believe you really said that," Matthijs admitted, although his lips was curling up into a smile. The bald Dutchman found the whole situation rather amusing. This football team hadn't ceased to amaze him ever since he first set foot in the Doghouse in Richmond.

"I just said that to make you feel better," Rebecca said. "Why the fuck else I'd bash the Eiffel Tower?"

"Because it's French?" Trent wondered.

"Well, besides that."

"Thanks, Boss; the balance of the Force has been restored," Ted said with a nod.

"Amen," Higgins added.

***

Standing in the queue, Ted Lasso was admiring the structure of the tower, still watching the enormous building in awe. His stomach jumped a little as he noticed how tiny were the people walking up and down on the stairs.

"Coach," he heard a deep voice next to him, and looking at his left, he saw Isaac McAdoo, looking a little sick.

"Is everything okay, Isaac?" he wondered.

"Can we have a drink before we go up there?" The captain asked.

"You mean, a beer or something?"

"Something stronger than that."

"Vertigo?" the moustached man raised a brow.

"Is that a cocktail?"

"It's a song by U2," Trent said, "but I think you meant the fear of heights."

"Yeah, that," Ted nodded. "Is there such a song?"

"Hello, hello, hola, I'm at a place called Vertigo," the former journalist sang. "Or something like that."

"Is it possible?" Isaac asked, changing the topic back.

Ted looked backwards to see the end of the queue that was longer behind than in front of them.

"I think only when we're up there," Ted told him. "You can do it before you look out. It's gonna be okay, don't worry."

"Thanks, Coach," Isaac said, and before he rejoined his teammates, he turned to Tent. "Don't you write that down."

And the former reporter just shook his head.

***

"Is everything okay, Will?" Higgins asked, stepping to the kitman who was watching the elevator moving up and down.

"Yeah, all is well," the boy replied. "I just can't get a song out of my head."

"Which song?"

"From Mamma Mia. You know, 'something-something-something by the Eiffel Tower...' I can't remember how it goes exactly."

"I know which one you mean," the director said and then he started to sing. "'I can still recall our last summer, I still see it all...'"

"'Walks along the Seine, laughing in the rain,'" Will continued as the lines started coming to his mind.

"'Our last summer, memories that remain,'" Rebecca joined them as well, still in the queue.

Hearing the singing, some players took out their phones: either to look for the lyrics or to record the performance. By the time they got to the first chorus, the entire team were all singing together.

***

As the elevator's doors closed, so did Isaac's eyes and sweat appeared on his temple as he tried to focus on his breathing. His low cursing got lost in the rest of the team's excited chitchat. He swallowed thickly as the elevator began to ascend and he squeezed his eyes shut as much as he could. Then he felt a hand on his shoulder.

"You're a strong and capable man," he heard Colin Hughes' voice. "You can do it."

He took a deep breath, inhaling Richard's strong cologne mixing with Colin's deodorant - Lime? Really? - and then he exhaled slowly.

"I'm a strong and capaple man," he repeated.

And he slowly opened his eyes.

Part 2

#ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #rebecca welton #leslie higgins #trent crimm #roy kent #keeley jones #will kitman #coach beard #isaac mcadoo #colin hughes #paris #my fics #eiffel tower #it's a bag of weird in here

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ghoul-bonez · 1 year

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~Through the Wind and Rain~

Chapter 5 (How to Breathe)

OC x OC set in the “Avatar: The Way of Water” universe…

Summary: Niri’te’s first full day in Awa’atlu.

Word count: 1.7k

Author's note: Boom new chapter!

Last - Next

Masterlist

Chapter 5 (How to Breathe)

It was early in the morning when I woke up, eclipse was still ending and it was not completely light outside yet, but I felt well rested. Yesterday was so exhausting I expected to sleep half the day away.

I probably would have been woken up by someone before them, most likely my teacher, Leyra, to begin lessons. I understand why I had to start right away, but I still couldn’t help but to feel annoyed that I didn’t get any adjustment period, no rest.

For now there was no learning though. For now there was getting ready for the day and eating some breakfast. The front of my marui was open overnight, my habit of falling asleep watching the world around me was strong, so the first thing I did was get up and close it before getting dressed.

I didn’t dress in anything particularly special but made sure to stay away from certain beaded tops I wasn’t sure would hold up in the water. I would have to ask Leyra if she knew whether the materials of them could survive in the water.

I felt my stomach grumble after I was done getting ready and I knew I would have to go out in search of food soon. I assumed fish would be their main food source, but I was also hoping for there to be some fruits available on the island. The thought eventually dawned on me that I had no food, or any knowledge of how to find any.

I could go to the Sullys, but I was not in the mood to have my food stolen all morning by Tuk and Lo’ak. Swatting their hands away while my food got cold was not ideal right now.

I could go to Leyra. I’m sure she would help me. She is my teacher, she will need to teach me how to get food, but hopefully for this morning it will not be a lesson. Hopefully this morning she will just share whatever she has with me.

It was lighter when I stepped outside, a few Metkayina people were already starting on their morning routines while others were just stepping out of their maruis like myself.

It was peaceful as I walked towards Leyra’s home. Nobody bothered me which was nice, although a couple children did stop and watch me, their mothers quickly ushering them away from me, scolding them for staring. I didn’t mind, I was a new face, different looking, so I understood.

Eventually I made it to Leyra’s marui, after a few wrong turns. I knocked by the open doorway, waiting for her to respond but instead a little boy came running to the opening, “Who are you?” He asked, but it sounded more like a demand to know.

Leyra’s voice came from further within, “Atan’eko who are you talking to like that?” She sounded motherly, scolding him.

He looked over his shoulder and I could see Leyra behind him, coming towards us, “I don’t know, but she looks weird.”

She gasped, “Atan, that is very rude!”

I laughed, “It’s okay. I’m Niri’te, and I do look weird, don’t I? I can promise where I come from I do not stand out though.” I smiled at the boy, knowing now he would want to ask questions.

I watched wonder swirl in his eyes, but before he could question me further Leyra spoke up, “She came from the same place as Tuk. You do remember Tuk, right?”

He nodded his head, “Yeah. Tuk also looks weird, but she’s fun to talk to.”

Leyra seemed frustrated with him, but he is just a boy, he’s still learning, “Alright why don’t you go find your friends then? I have important things to do with Niri’te today.”

“Okay, bye sister!” He began to run off, stopping quickly to wave at us before running again, faster this time. He spun around, people moving out of the way for him quickly as he burst through clusters of people like a little twirling tornado.

“Bye Atan.” She yelled after him, “Why don’t you come in now. I’m guessing you're hungry?”

I stepped inside the marui taking a look around, it was pretty empty but I could tell Atan spent a lot of time here, toys spread all over the ground, “So you have a brother?” I questioned her.

“Yes, he is my responsibility most of the time, but thankfully his friends' parents are very understanding and will watch him during the day for me.” She stopped for a second, “Our parents are very busy people. Hopefully you will get to meet them sometime.”

“Meeting your parents already? Aren’t we moving kind of fast.” I joked and she laughed, covering her smile with her hand. I felt those feelings swirl again, like a strong wind was kicking them up, like the rain would come soon. I pushed them away, “I am hungry though.”

“Well lucky for you I made extra for breakfast.” She smiled. Saying nothing more she put the food on two plates and handed one to me.

We ate peacefully, small conversations happening, but mostly basking in each other’s presence and silence. It was nice just existing next to someone, but eventually all good things come to an end, and as we finished Leyra announced we should begin on my lessons.

She dragged me out of the marui by the arm, quickly, excited. I could tell she was excited. I couldn’t lie, I was too. I was learning a new skill set, and I loved mastering new things. I had perfected archery, weaving, and even as much cooking as I could.

We walked along the pathways, onto the beach, and then until Leyra finally found a good spot in the shade and sat down expecting me to follow, so I did, “I’m assuming you know how to swim. Am I correct?” she asked.

I nodded at her, “Yeah.”

She smiled to herself, like she already knew the answer to her question, but wanted to confirm with me, “Great, I will not have to teach you that. We will start with breathing then.”

I laughed loudly at her, “I think I already know how to breathe.”

She sighed, glaring at me, clearly I wasn’t taking her seriously enough, “Yes, but not properly. Not for diving.”

My face dropped, was there really a different way to breathe for diving? Well, I guess I was about to find out, “Okay, then teach me.”

“Don’t worry, I will.” Leyra reached her hand out, and as she placed her hand on my stomach she explained, “You must breathe from here, it will give you more breath, more time under the water.” then her other hand reached out to my chest, “You also must slow your heart beat. Imagine your heart is fire, a flickering flame, slow the flickering down.”

I took a deep breath in, following her instructions. I focused on my breathing and tried to slow my heart rate while her hand laid on my stomach. I was distracted by something I couldn’t describe. Yes she was pretty, breathtaking perhaps, but I don’t think that was the reason why. I was never so affected by other people though.

Why was it so hard to focus around her?

Why was my heart beating so fast?

What was so different about her?

Her touch, her voice, her presence, everything about her was different. The feeling she gave me was unexplainable. I would not be able to put it into words if someone were to ask. The best way to describe her is that she feels calming, like cool rain on your skin after a long day of hunting.

“Your heart rate is fast, Niri’te.” She stated the obvious, smiling widely at me.

I laughed out loud at her, closing my eyes and throwing my head back, “It’s a little hard with a pretty girl’s hands on me.” I played it off. It was so much more than that, she was more than just a pretty girl, but I couldn’t tell anyone that. I couldn’t even decide what it meant to myself.

Leyra quickly removed her hands and pulled them towards her chest, “Oh.” she blushed hard and I smiled at her, feeling warmth spread across my face as well.

Quickly I changed the subject, “What if we get in the water now? I’m sure I can learn as I go.” It can’t be that hard, and I’m familiar with swimming so that should be easy.

She shook her head no, “ I haven’t even begun teaching you how to communicate in the water. You must know some of the basics before we begin swimming or diving.”

I thought for a second, coming up with a quick idea, “We can just surface when you need to tell me something?” It can’t be any more complicated than that.

She rolled her eyes, shaking her head again, “No, you need to learn how to properly speak under the water.”

Now I was confused, people can not speak underwater, it’s not possible, “How am I supposed to speak underwater?”

“I will show you.” she put her hands up, moving them as she spoke, “We speak with our hands.”

For the rest of the day that was all we did, talk through our hands. It was hard learning a new language, but I thought I was doing well. Catching on quickly. Leyra however seemed less impressed, and kept correcting me.

After hours of repeating the same things over and over again, the sun began to eclipse and we headed our separate ways to relax and eat dinner with goodbyes and promises of seeing each other again tomorrow.

I joined the Sullys for dinner again because I still didn’t have any of my own food, but this time it was less tense and Neytiri even seemed to somewhat enjoy my company. Lo’ak and Tuk focused less on my food and more on Kiri’s which I feel was because they could sense the exhaustion setting into my bones as much as I could feel it myself. The day hadn’t been very physically exhausting, but it had been long, and my mind had worked hard.

As I was falling asleep sitting up, Jake shook my shoulder, “Go get some rest, kid.”

I just nodded in response and lugged my body up off the floor. Everyone said their goodbyes which I was only half paying attention to, before I left back to my marui.

I quickly prayed, telling Eywa about my day, before I hopped into my hammock and fell asleep.

Word Bank:

Marui (Metkayina homes)

Metkayina (Ocean Na’vi)

Eywa (Na’vi goddess)

#avatar movie #avatar the way of water #fanfiction #fanfic #avatar fanfiction #avatar oc #avatar 2009 #avatar #atwow #atwow fanfiction #atwow fics

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marcholasmoth · 5 months

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OSRR: 3422

goddamn. i was so incoherent yesterday.

i was literally falling asleep as i wrote it, so that makes sense. at least today im a little more awake. also i have a headache so that's unfortunate.

today was a fiasco. i started out at the pharmacy getting a couple of vaccines. when i got out of the pharmacy, it was raining so hard i could barely hear the guy who walked out after me say "it's a good thing it's not snow!"

but mom and i had plans today. so i ran through the puddles and got back home and mom and i went out to the little english goods shop in westford, only to discover that they were closed due to a power outage.

so we did what any normal person would do:

we found somewhere else to go.

we had found one in concord, MA in searches yesterday, so i pulled that address up and we drove through more driving rain (which was so loud i had to yell directions at her from the seat beside her).

the shop we found was beautiful! it had lots of food and stuff, but it also had coats and clothing and hats and gloves and wallets and bags and full tea sets and all sorts of stuff. definitely going back there.

we got a bunch of stuff and made it home eventually through less rain, only to arrive home to a flooded basement. i ended up taking a nap because the back and forth of the yelling downstairs and the uncomfortable drive made both my head and back hurt, respectively. it was a nice nap.

i woke up to dinner being done, of which i ate none. i was preoccupied by the fact that now we also had no hot water and i was considering going to joel's tonight instead of tomorrow.

that didn't happen. a guy came over and fixed the water.

in the meantime, joel and i are probably going to invest in some callax shelves from ikea because they're actually quite sturdy and i enjoy them and they're the right size for boxes for cards, so that would be good.

anyway, i'm going to see joel tomorrow afternoon because i don't want to drive down the hill i didn't make it all the way down last week. i don't want a repeat.

i'm surprised i'm still okay with driving, to be perfectly honest. that's something to discuss with christine. who i had forgotten i had an appointment with today, so when she called i had to tell her i needed to reschedule. of all days i could've used to talk to her, i was out with my mom.

rats.

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3400s #sunshine boy

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melusine0811 · 7 months

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AO3 tag game!

tagged by @nico-demons

ao3 name: Melusine0811

fandoms: Horizon Zero Dawn/Forbidden West, Doctor Who, Mass Effect, and The Last of Us

number of works: 15

work I spent the most time on: Current wip "The Space Between the Stars"

work I spent the least time on: My little TLOU oneshot about Bill and Frank's last moments together. I felt so inspired by that episode, I wrote it in a couple of hours in a hotel room on my iPad during one of my son's hockey tournaments- Walking in the Airless Dark

longest work: The Space Between the Stars- 126,000 words so far

shortest work: The TLOU fic...900 words-ish

most hits: The Space Between the Stars

most kudos: Again The Space Between the Stars.

total word count: 313,954

favorite work of my own: The Space Between the Stars, absolutely. With my 13th Doctor/Rose Tyler fic "When the Chaos Calls Me Out" as a close second, and my Mass Effect fic "Quasar" there too. This is like choosing my favorite child!

fic you want to rewrite/expand on: I keep saying I am going to rewrite or rework my Tentoo x Rose fic "The Dream of Atlas" because it was my first fic, and I was a brand new baby writer. I would also like to continue working on the Mass Effect Femshep x Liara post-destroy ending fic that would be a sequel to Quasar.

share a bit of a wip or story idea you are planning on:

From the chapter of The Space Between the Stars I posted yesterday:

Before Aloy pulls off her Focus, she uses it to switch off the overhead light, leaving nothing but candlelight. Their silhouettes merge as Seyka pulls her towards the bed, navigating around the long curved desk. Seyka turns Aloy so that she can collapse on top of the Nora on the mattress, skin searing and pressed together, finally.

And they’re home, bodies moving against one another, chilled yet feverish and shifting with delicious friction already, tangled together as though it had been etched into their grey matter. They’re known to one another. Every plane of skin, every freckle, every place they agonize for the other’s touch.

As though this has been going on for a thousand years…but each time is still like the first time.

It’s too quiet in here…inside the Base. There’s no wind, no rain, no crickets. No ocean waves and no nighttime sounds muted by heavy snow. No machines lumbering past. Just the whirr of the systems running the Base itself…and them, their bodies flexing against one another, the whisper of sliding skin, mouths roaming, hands grasping. Can’t get close enough. Can’t reach into the other’s soul and touch her essence, so this will have to do.

Aloy slides her hands down to Seyka’s backside, squeezing and pulling her tightly against her, encouraging Seyka to grind into her as they each navigate that hazy, viscous feeling of the all-consuming need raging through their bodies. Seyka can feel Aloy drag her callused hands up and down the tapestry of her skin as though they’re blots of pigment—clarity with which she can now see herself in color.

tagging: My moths- @rizz-god @solitae @kestrelgreys @drayna @despite-the-nora

#tag game

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trashyswitch · 2 years

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Another Remembrance Day

Jameson wakes up on Remembrance Day, 2022. And...after putting on his uniform, he finds that surviving his 104th remembrance day...is not all sunshine and rainbows...not even close...

Part 4 of Sgt. Jameson Jackson

Part 3

⚠️Trigger warning: Talks of war, war flashbacks and PTSD. Please read with caution, if this effects you. ⚠️

I know my remembrance day fanfic is late...didn't even know I was going to be uploading one until I started it yesterday morning. So...I hope it suffices.

Jameson sighed as he slowly sat up in bed. He was having more flashbacks than usual recently…and it wasn’t hard to see why…

Today was Remembrance day…A day to celebrate the heroes of the world wars, as well as the heroes of the other wars in history.

Jamie sighed and rubbed his eyes before getting out of bed. He walked up to his closet, and grabbed his brown, worn down uniform out of his closet. It was incredible that the uniform was still so well preserved…Maybe it helped that the clothing was made to last for generations…

unlike the modern things made only to last a couple of years for profit reasons.

Jamie took the pants off the hook. He cleaned the dust off of them a bit, and slipped them onto his legs. It…still fits perfectly. And he wasn’t so sure he liked knowing this…He put on the british coat and buttoned it up. He grabbed his puttee wraps and wrapped them around his legs from the knee, to the ankle. He tied it at the end, before putting on his war shoes. The shoes were still somewhat stained with blood, mud and other unspeakable things…And Jamie wasn’t afraid to leave them the way they were.

Lastly, Jamie looked in his closet for his metal hat, or his leather cap. One of them would work well. He wanted to wear the metal hat because it showed he helped in the trenches…but he felt like the cap felt more noble.

He grabbed the cap and cleaned off the top of it with his hand. There was only a little bit of dust on the top of the cap. He put the cap onto his own head and looked at himself in the mirror. He took one look at the mirror and widened his eyes.

{There was 3 feet of mud in the trenches. It had rained that morning, and completely drenched the trenches in mud and soot. Trying to walk in the mud felt gross at first. But after a year of walking in the muddy water, Jameson was used to it. He could feel his drenched feet squishing and refilling with mud as he walked.

As he walked, bullets were flying past the trenches and hitting people down. As Jameson walked, people kept falling off the trench wall either groaning in pain, shouting in shock, or completely silent. And sadly, it was mostly the last one. Most people who were shot by the enemy were lucky if they got shot in the shoulder. Cause there was a large chance it could’ve been the head.

Jameson grabbed his rifle off his shoulder and moved out of the way of a falling soldier. He sighed and looked at the dying soldier. Here today, gone tomorrow…That’s what they always say.

He climbed up against the trench wall, and reloaded his gun with a couple bullets. With his rifle set, he aimed his rifle at any enemy’s heads that may be popping out from their own trenches.

BANG.}

Jamie gasped and covered his ears as he heard the loud gunshot noises fill his ears. He could feel the fear and anxiety growing in his chest.

{BOOM. BANG-BANG!

Some of the sniper shots were his own…and everywhere he looked, there were people shooting the Fritz’s, or Germans. People falling limp, blood squirting out of wounds, people being left for dead or picked up by the Stretcher-bearers. mud, or wet rations, absolutely everywhere. It was impossible to not step in mud. Constant shouting.

BANG! BANG! BANG! BA-BANG!

Jameson lowered himself down and looked behind him. He watched as soldiers ran back and forth through the trenches.

“Got cold feet? Keep firing!” Someone yelled at Jameson.

Jameson quickly reloaded his sniper, climbed back up to the top of the trenches and pointed his gun at the enemy.

BANG…BANG!

Jameson pulled back the metal joystick on the top of the rifle and put more bullets into the middle spot in the gun. He pushed the bullets down into place, before pushing the metal joystick into place and locking it in on the right side. He readied his gun again and pointed it towards a Fritz’s head.

BANG! BANG!...BANG BANG! BANG!

“Jamie! Jameson!” Someone called to him. Jamie was too focused on the other Fritz heads that were sticking out from the other trench. He readied the gun.

BANG!

“Jamie!”

BANG-BANG!}

“JAMIE!”

A painful slap touched down on his cheek in full force. Jamie gasped and felt his own red cheek. He looked at the mirror and saw his hat was gone. Who took his hat?! And who slapped him?!

“Jamie? You okay?” Chase called.

Jamie looked at Chase and frowned. ‘Did you slap me?’ He signed.

Chase widened his eyes and looked down. “You…remember that?” Chase asked.

Jamie looked down and saw that his hat was in Chase’s hand. Jamie narrowed his eyes and snatched the cap from his hands, before putting it onto his head.

“I…” Chase sighed and showed him the red thing in his hand. “I was just coming in to give you your poppy…but…” Chase muttered.

Jamie sighed and rubbed his dry eyes…

Only to feel wetness on his eyes and on his cheeks. He looked at his own hand in surprise. Was he…crying?

Chase placed his hand on his chest to put the poppy onto Jamie.

Jamie widened his eyes as another flashback plagued him.

{“Hold him down. He’s moving too much!” The doctor yelled. “Jameson Jackson, hold still!” She yelled at him.}

Jamie pushed Chase away as he breathed heavily. Chase took the hint immediately, and headed out the door. “Henrik, Jamie’s having more flashbacks.” Chase told him.

Henrik looked at Chase with shock. “You…vant ME to help vizh zhat?” Henrik asked.

Chase nodded. “You know how to help PTSD patients better than I do.” Chase told him.

Henrik blinked and stared at him, dumbfounded. “I am German. Deutsch! Austria-Hungarian! The enemy of Vorld Var vone and two!” Henrik told him. “You vant a Deutsch person to help a British var veteran?!” Henrik asked.

Chase bit his lip. “I know…I know it sounds stupid. But you are more than German or dutch-” Chase started.

Henrik rolled his eyes. “Deutsch, Chase.” Henrik said.

“Yeah yeah, but the point is, you are a doctor! You know about psychological disorders and how to help them.” Chase told him.

Henrik shook his head. “I am un surgeon. Not a psychologist.” Henrik told him.

Chase put his hands together in prayer position. “Pleeeeeeaase?” Chase begged.

Henrik let out a long sigh. “Fine…but you owe me. I vant you to make a Banoffee pie for Jameson.” Henrik told him.

Chase hummed. “Alright…Why not Red Velvet Cake?” Chase asked.

Henrik chuckled. “You made zhat for Jameson’s birzhday.” Henrik told him.

Chase raised his eyebrows. “I did?” He asked.

“You do not remember?!” Henrik reacted.

“Alright, alright. I’ll start on the banoffee pie thing. It’ll take an hour or so, so take your time.” Chase told Henrik.

Henrik walked to Jamie’s room and gently knocked on the door. He opened the door and widened his eyes when he saw Jameson in his trenches outfit. And it wasn’t just an outfit that you’d get from serving in the war…it was the real thing from over a hundred years ago.

“Hei…” Henrik reacted, saying the German word for wow. “You look unglaublich…” Henrik reacted.

Jamie turned around to look at Henrik, his cheeks and eyes stained with tears.

“Lieber gott…” Henrik muttered as he looked at Jamie up and down. “Do…Do you have zhe rifle?” Henrik asked.

Jamie widened his eyes and looked towards the little spot between the dresser and the closet. He slowly walked up to the little spot and grabbed out his old sniper rifle. He removed the knife from the rifle head, and showed Henrik the gun.

“You have had it since your time in zhe var?” Henrik clarified.

Jamie looked down and nodded.

Henrik walked a little bit closer, making sure his arms were up in surrender position. He smiled a little bit and cleared his throat. “Have you heard of zhe story? About zhe Christmas truce?” Henrik asked.

Jamie softened his expression and looked down a bit. He nodded his head slowly and held the gun close to his chest.

“Germans vere singing Christmas carols. Silent Night? Stille Nacht?”

Henrik started singing. 🎶Stille Nacht, heilige Nacht, Alles schläft; einsam wacht,🎶

Jamie listened to him sing, and started to mouth the English words. ‘Round yon virgin Mother and Child’

Henrik resumed singing.

🎶Holder Knabe im lockigen Haar,🎶

‘Sleep in heavenly peace.’ Jamie mouthed.

🎶Schlaf in himmlischer Ruh…🎶 Henrik sung.

Jamie smiled a little bit and started doing something huge: he started whisper-singing Silent Night!!

“Silent night, holy night,

Shepherds quake at the sight.” Jamie whispered.

Henrik smiled brightly and continued in his native language. 🎶Durch der Engel Halleluja,

Tönt es laut von fern und nah.🎶

“Christ the saviour is booooorn…” Jamie whispered.

🎶Christ, der Retter ist da.🎶 Henrik finished.

Jamie sniffled and sobbed. He gently placed his gun down onto his bed, and held his hands close to his face as he started crying.

Henrik started to walk to him, but was taken back when he heard footsteps. Jamie had decided to run to Henrik to give Henrik a really big hug. He wrapped his arms around the German man and cried in his arms.

Henrik held Jamie in his arms tightly, smiling as he cried a little bit too. The fact that Jamie was so determined to sing that he started whispering, was incredible! The fact that he could have easily sang with sign language, but chose not to, was huge.

And in return, Jamie was so happy to hear Henrik singing such a classic carol…In his own native tongue too! and he was super thankful that Henrik remembered such a beautiful tale of war and Christmas, that was both controversial for a bit, yet later considered a beautiful story for generations to hear. If Christmas wasn’t about santa clause, or about Jesus’ birth, then it would be about the uniting of enemies on Christmas Day.

Jamie let go of Henrik after a bit and smiled a crooked smile at him. He lowered his hands down, before offering a handshake to Henrik.

Henrik raised an eyebrow and chuckled. “A handshake? Really?” Henrik asked.

Jamie’s eager look dropped a bit. He looked away for a moment, before looking back at Henrik. “From a British soldier to a descendent of Austria-Hungarians…” Jamie whispered.

Henrik widened his eyes and covered his mouth with both his hands in shock. “You- You vant to shake my hand as a truce?!” Henrik reacted. “I-…I-I-…Uh…Well, I know zhat my grandfazher vas a soldier and fought in zhe var…he unfortunately died in battle, but had children before zhe var-”

Jamie lowered his hand down, closed his eyes and let out a long, slightly annoyed sigh. He lifted his hand up, and offered him the handshake.

Henrik had stopped talking the moment he had seen Jamie drop his hand down to sigh. Henrik finally locked hands with the man, shook it, and smiled a bit. “From un Austria-Hungarian descendant to a var veteran…Zhank you.” Henrik told him.

Jamie smiled and did another firm shake of the hand.

With all that in place, Jamie was able to accept the war a little bit more. Though shaking hands with Henrik didn’t really solve the war issue or the PTSD, it did give him a sense of closure from a Fritz (German) enemy.

And when everything was ready, Chase offered Jamie a piece of the banoffee pie he had made! Jamie was ecstatic to see such an old, traditional dessert being made in 2022! And though the banoffee pie was slightly different (a bit too much grated chocolate and slightly lacking in the banana’s), it was still a wonderful treat to experience after way too long.

And when the TV started playing the moment of silence for the lost and living veterans, they all bowed their heads, closed their eyes, and went silent. Jamie even placed his hand on his heart to show his devotion to his people and his country. For if it were not for himself and billions of people, this country would not be even close to the same country it is today. And he felt blessed…blessed to have lived (though at a cost), and blessed to have such incredible friends.

#angst and hurt/comfort #angst with a happy ending #post traumatic stress disorder #medical trauma #flashbacks #christmas truce

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transmissionsfromthebattlefield · 1 year

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Kent Skate (Yet)

As my last photos I posted indicated, I went ice skating for the first time on Friday. Ever since last year they’ve blocked off one of the streets by the campus’s barren, esplanaded edge and installed a rink for a few months in winter.

Friday was also the day the historic mill downtown caught fire. Before I went to the rink I was watching it being put out from a distance as blinking lights from the fire department’s vehicles punched holes in the black. Blocks away it was being pierced by cutesy Christmas lights they put around while I was home on break last weekend. They finally put the fire out yesterday afternoon. It made me angry at first. A seemingly eternal view, one that I had appreciated and even taken for granted, totally destroyed. I try to never take attending an institution with such a history attached to it for granted. I walk with the weight of a scholarship in memory of a man who worked his tail to preserve that history for future generations when he was alive; I can’t just take certain presences for granted, can I? But I still took that quaint Taco Tontos view for granted. Things are wack here.

Skating did help distract me, though. I had always wanted to try it out, and having roller skated on and off for a while, it was easy to pick up, as much as I clung to the wall. It felt satisfying and even empowering. I took a few knees and resigned with confidence (and one independent lap) to catch the last bus home. It just felt good, good to be out there doing something I had always wanted to, on a whim and without external limitation. Bruised knees are cool.

I skated for the second time tonight at the university arena, which has public skating sessions every so often. The lobby is excruciatingly wood panel, and it has the faint smell of popcorn from the snack bar. There is a party room where a bunch of little girls were having a party. Out on the rink I kept running into (not literally) a really adorable little girl with bangs, black leggings, and a slightly-too-big Nirvana shirt. I should’ve turned her on to the Melvins, but I had skating to do. Other than the small children (of which there were many), there were all kinds of people there, including funhaving college couples, cocky college boys, and a few seasoned vets who seemed to effortlessly glide across the floor. I kept looking at one guy, an older guy who looked kind of like David Crosby but not absurd in the facial hair department, who just casually sailed along with his hands in his pockets. He just seemed so cool.

I was not cool on the ice, or at least I didn’t feel cool, because my continued reliance on the wall got me trapped in a lot of traffic jams behind tiny children who didn’t really know how to skate, and I kept falling on my ass. My roller skating career ended when I was standing completely still in the middle of the street hockey court in a hometown-local park, lost my balance for a split second, fell on my ass, and sprained my wrist catching my fall. Obviously, I was overjoyed to keep falling on my ass. GREAT JOB.

I can tell I’m doing well just going out there at all, even if my confidence tonight lasted in spurts. It was just a different experience. It was admittedly a little hard to focus, especially when “You Don’t Know You’re Beautiful” segued into “Baby Shark” near the end of the hour and a half when the sound system had tired of Christmas music. (The downtown rink did supply “Simply Having A Wonderful Christmastime” at the same exact time as actual rain, but at least it stayed on theme.) I’m not sure if I made any progress tonight, really. But I don’t want to abandon it out of lack of immediate proficiency. Because when I do get into the zone, the things that weigh heavy are trivial, and I feel like I can do anything.

I think I can get the hang of it.

#blog #ice skating #the best sport ever made #one of the hardest to master and no one masterd it because its impossible to master #resigned newbie #new experiences #trying new things #sports are fun #FINDING A HOBBY #great job #Kent Ohio #Kent State #Kent Skates #Kent mill fire #mental distracti0ns #epic Urban Dictionary definitions #don't do crystal meth

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whatdoesshedotothem · 1 year

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Thursday 29 November 1832

7 5

12 5

F46 ½° at 7 5 and wild windy morning but fair and pretty clear – very rainy windy boisterous night – at 8 ½ sent off my letter written last night to Mrs Norcliffe and on Tuesday night and dated Tuesday to ‘Mrs Norcliffe Langton Hall Malton’ 3 pages and ends and under the seal written this morning to say she or anybody would obliged me much by writing a note to Mr Todd (if the question was fair) to ask the name of her friend the author of the national history of Enthusiasm - said I had 2 months yet on my hands before getting off from here - might have more but should do the best I could to get off - sitting down to breakfast with my father at 8 25 - note from Miss Walker - we are going to Halifax this morning the day was too unfavourable yesterday may I hope to see you on Saturday Thursday wrote in answer thank you very much for your note I shall hope to see you on Saturday affectionately yours AL it was dated at the top Shibden Hall Thurs 29 Novemver 1832 answered Miss W-‘s note and then breakfast at 9 - from 9 ½ to 12 ¾ - with Wilson and his man doing the library passage - in taking up 2 of the floor boards found the under drawing of the passage below nailed to them and the young had nearly slipped thro’ - at 1 5 down the old bank to Mr Parker’s office - took Washington’s plan of the footpaths and bridle road in lower brea road I wish to stop - explained all this etc then took the former of prayers I have got for Miss W- to Whitley’s ordering it to be bound in crimson Morocco with purple watered silk fly-leaves and richly guilt [gilt] – home again in an hour – at 2 ¼ went down to Pickles and his son John – had John Booth and Charles and James Howarth and got a fine bush of thorn and holly grown together (that John had got ready on Tuesday) into the cart, and carried down and planted at the outside of the Tilly holm gate into my walk, then getting up and planting 5 or 6 hazels on the calf croft pit hill – walked till I could scarce see on the grope my way home – changed my things – dinner at 6 – found on my desk note from Mr. Parker to say cannot get the roads stopt at the next sessions – a week too late – better therefore to postpone getting the magistrates order - after dinner wrote the above of today and wrote 3 pages and ends and under the seal to M- went into the little room at 9 ¾ - skimmed over tonight’s courier an hour (till 11 5) with Marian in the library passage - Letter from Dr Belcombe tonight, nearly 2pp. - my account of Miss W- quite as he good as he expected - he has made a slight change in the mixture - she must persevere - it will be sometime before she can do without medicine - to write again in 3 weeks – went to my room at 11 ¼ - fine day – tho’ rain from about 8 ½ am more or less for about a couple of hours – and rain between 5 and 6pm. and rainy windy boisterous evening and night – F44° now at 10 20

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tuscanwalker · 2 years

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Sept 28, 2022: La Storta to St. Peter’s Basilica Rome: 23.5 km; CUS - 1,900 ft

Live and Learn

The British tour group tracked in quite a while after us last night, soaked from the rain we avoided. They are still a cheerful group even now and it is a privilege to have them share the end of our camino. Dinner last night was a Sardinian seafood restaurant about a kilometre from the hotel. The meal was fine, but nothing exceptional. The white Sardinian wine was great: crisp, fresh and somewhat complex (still trying to identify some of the elements/notes).

Today looked easy at the start as our accommodation was already 2 km further along the route from yesterdays end point. So only 17 km to go and only one steep climb of a couple of hundred meters plus some smaller ones. Easy, peasy!

Then reality set in. We spent much of morning wandering through a park that was likely a flood plain. Saw lots of signs of Chingale (wild boar) including tracks, scat and rooting along the trail. Unlike my France trip, no actual wild boar were spotted. Some of the trail markings were not clear and we added a couple of km to the day. The height of the first climb was right, but it was brutally steep, we estimate 25% at least. In an Edmonton winter, no Range Rover would make it up. A cappuccino and a short break and we were off again.

Once we reached the top of Monte Mario (my grandsons would have expected a short Italian with a red cap and bushy moustache to jump on their heads), there were beautiful views of the city and Michelangelo’s Dome atop St Peter’s. Unfortunately, the road down was an endless series of switchbacks on very rough cobblestones that chewed up the bottom of your feet and punished your joints. At the bottom, it was a straight shot to St Peter’s, past the ever vigilant Swiss Guards.

The Vatican has long hired Swiss Mercenaries but they became a permanent fixture in 1527, when 147 of 189 guards and their commander died protecting Clement VII from the Holy Roman Emperor’s unpaid Spanish Mercenaries during the sack of Rome. They fought a rear guard action on the passageway between the Papal Apartments and Castle St Angelo (Hadrians Tomb) allowing the Pope to lock himself away out of reach. He eventually ransomed himself by making good on the Spaniards overdue pay. Unlike our first trip, the Pilgrims Office (Opera Romana Pelligrinaggi) no longer issues Testimoniums. You must first enter St. Peter’s through the endless lines of tourists waiting to be checked by security. Even then, we understand that packs are not permitted so we headed off to our hotel.

Now things got nasty. Out hotel is 4.5 km due south of St Peter’s, well out of central Rome. It also involves a 500 ft+ climb and a 250 ft drop. By the time we got to our hotel an hour and a quarter later, we were tired and frustrated, only to find we had a room was a matrimonial rather than a twin. This was quickly fixed just in time to see the British tour group walk in about an hour after us. This is the advantage of having a guide. They apparently took a train from St Peter’s rather than walked. With a little research, I found that the train takes about 6 minutes, leaves every 9 minutes and only requires a few block walk at each end. It would have been nice if the tour company had provided us with this information. Oh well, live and learn. We will not make that mistake again.

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m1k3yrr3v3ng3 · 6 days

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To the love, I left my conscience pressed between the pages of the Bible in the draw (part 1 of 2)

——————————————————————

It was that last show of the tour and god was it amazing. I stood backstage watching as I watched my Boyfriend and his band rock out on stage. I waved to Pete and blew him a kiss as he was playing the bass, he blew a kiss back and mouthed “I love you princess” causing hot pink blush to paint my face.

“I would like to dedicate this song to my amazing girlfriend Ri and I actually wrote this about her” The crowd cheered at his words and I was extreamly curious on what song it was knowing that like 25% of the songs Pete wrote are about me.

“I comb the crowd and pick you out, my mouth moves too fast for you to figure it out, it starts eyes closed then fingers crossed to I sware I say” Patrick sang into the mic and I started blushed harder as Pete looked at me with love. It was XO! You know how every couple has a song, XO was our song. It was practically our love story as a song meaning that is like my favorite song ever. It even included how we met. I remembered that night like it was yesterday.

It was a warm and rainy Chicago night back in 2003, the night before I would graduate high school. me and my friends went into some bar for a concert, we had no idea who the band was, the poster just said it was a “surprise show” whatever that ment. I had on a hot pink skull tank top, black Tripp pants with hot pink accents, a beat up pair of black convers, and hot pink arm warmer with my bangs swept to the side. We where there a little early and with the black X on my right hand I was limited on what I could do so I just downed a few Sherly Temples and talked with my friends about what ever teenage girls talked about in 2003.

The band finally came out, their name was Fall Out Boy and the first thing I could notice about them was how fucking hot their bass player was. The band was also fucking amazing but I could not keep my eyes off the bass player: Pete Wentz. He seemed a few years older than me and had on a bright red t-shirt which also had a skull, baggy black jeans, checkered vans, and his hair was a mix of spiked and shaggy. My heart was beating faster than usual and I felt hot which could have been from the crowed bar but also could have come from the fact there was a hot guy right in-front of me.

As I left the bar I had 3 things on my mind: That fact that this was my last big high school adventure, all of the lyrics to the songs, and that I would most likely never see Pete agian. That was until I noticed my phone was missing, just as I turned around I saw Pete with my hot pink razr in his hands walking up to me.

“Hey…. By any chance is this your?” He asked as I blushed at the fact he was talking to a dork like me. “Oh ya… It is thanks, you guys were like fucking amazing out there tonight.” I replied. He chuckled at my complement “No way we found our first fangirl, well it was nice meeting you”

“Wait… mind if we like talk” I asked him and shockingly, he agreed. He was really nice and we got along really well but after an hour I knew I needed to go. It was pouring rain out and I don’t know what got ahold of me but I decided I needed to confess my feelings. “Pete, I think I’m in love with you” I stated calmly, he looked at me for a second and then kissed me with all the passion in the world. “I think I love you too Ri” he replied as he put his forehead on mine. I ended up getting his phone number and we ended up going on a date two days later, we have been madly in love ever since.

As the final words were sung and and chords were played I saw Pete look at me then go up to the mic. “Anyways before we play the last song I would like to invite Ri onto the stage, you can come out baby there is nothing to fear” I giggled and walked out on stage, running into my boyfriends arms for a hug. I did not care about all the fangirls annoyed sighs or even the cheering of the crowd, it was only me and Pete who truly mattered in that moment.

“You look so adorable baby you know that right” Pete whispered into my ear and then peppered kisses all over my face. “I know handsome, you tell me that all the time” I giggle and kiss him on the lips softly. Over a few second the kiss turned into a sloppy make out as our tounges started to explore each others mouths as he pulls me close to his chest with his arms around my shoulders.

“Get a room you two” We overhear Patrick over the crowds cheering. He was teasing us as if we were teenagers getting caught kissing behind the bleachers which causes the kiss to brake off. “Go fuck yourself Patrick” I scoffed and stuck out you tounge which caused to crowd to go fucking insane.

“There is an extremely important I need to ask you after 5 years of us being together…. The time is right” I waited on baited breath as I saw my boyfriend get down on one knee and pull out a small black box and opened it up to see a Hot Pink diamond on and black ring band. “No way he is actully going do what I think he is going to do” I think to myself practically hearing my own thoughts as everyone goes quiet

“Will you marry me” He asked

I look at him as of he hung the moon as my eyes started to water. It felt so unreal, like a scene from one of those crappy teen dramas where the main couple consisting of two 16 year olds get eloped. The quietness made me worry that I would mess up but I knew my answer like the back of my god damn hand.

“Duh, of course I want to marry you Pete” I hugged him tightly as soon as he got up. He placed the ring on my right hand and kissed my hand softly causing me to laugh softly. Our eyes interlocked together and soon our lips connected like two pieces of a puzzle.

The kiss was as sweet as honey but as addictive as death. His mouth pressed delicetly agenst mine caused shockwaves of love to be sent down my body. He ran his hand through my short dirty blond scene hair while his other curessed my cheek. I never wanted this kiss to end, I felt like i was in haven and Pete’s lips were the gates. He looked at me with love in his eyes as I softly thanked him “anything for you my clandestine queen” he replied as he swept me of my feet and spun me around.

I knew I had to go but I was scilently begging to stay for the last song. I walked off stage as the band started playing Saturday, blowing a kiss to my now fiancée causing the crowd to cheer the loudest I ever heard.

I waited backstage for the show to end, still shocked from the engagement. How do I tell my friends and family cause they would have probably found out by now due to a low quality photo. The notifications on my MySpace must be crazy, but agian I’m a famous MySpace scene queen so they’re always crazy but now with my engagement I might brake the damn site.

As soon as the show ended I ran into Pete’s arms, reuniting with my lover after what felt like forever but was only 5 minutes. “I think congrats are in order for Mr and Mrs Wentz” said Patrick as he walked passed the two of us in the middle of a warm embrace. “Now that I think about, your name sounds so cute with my last name.” Pete whispered in my ear causing me to smile softly as he whispered more sweet nothings.

The next hour was filled with congratulations, phone calls from family and friends, and the whole band (minus Andy) taking shots to celebrate the tour. As the clock struck midnight, it was only Me and Pete due to the rest of the band going to the hotel earlier, we walked the streets of the city as the rain got more heavier. In the span of five minutes the rain went from a light drizzle to the heaviest downpour I have ever seen but the full moon was still viable. Our hands were interlocked as the rain rushed down soaking us, but we did not care.

“Ri” Pete’s voice broke thought the atmosphere. I looked at him a softly smile “what is it” I giggled softly. “Have I ever told you how much I fucking love you” I blush at Pete’s words and rolled my eyes. “You tell me that all the time babe, it’s the reason why your marrying me” I snap back playfully

“Speaking of marriage…. What if we get married tonight, no one needs to know, we can deal is the public later.” Pete stated causing my breath to hitch as the rain got heavier. We could not get married tonight, he only proposed four hours ago and we have nothing planned or a single clue on what we are doing. I do like the idea of an elopement, considering we’re a “It couple” in some way I would be nice to get privcy from the world for once. Plus I really do wanna get married soon, who can blame me!

“Maybe in a few days when we get back to Chicago. We can sneak off in the middle of the night to some like fancy park building, Patrick can officiate, we sign the papers and then I’m officially Mrs Wentz.” I reply as I grasp my fiancée’s hand tighter and look into his hazel eyes. “That works” he said leaning in to kiss me.

Everything about it was perfect: the pouring rain, the full moon, but most importantly the feeling of his lips on mine. It was gentle yet rough at the same time, his lips softly touched mine but his tounge exploded my mouth like he was going to die. It was sweet like candy but spicy like fire. When the kiss broke it felt like a heroin addict going through withdraw, begging for more.

We stood in scilance for a minute or two just basking in each others love until Pete spoke up “I love you Ri”

“I love you too, Pete”

YAYYYYYY

#i'm kinda obsessed with the drug metaphors in these. very wentzian.#asks

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valerie · 1 month

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TWITL - week 14 - after spring break

Tuesday - 02 April Yesterday was the first day of the 4th quarter and first day back from spring break. I had a lot of emails to go through! I didn't have a lot of voicemails, which was surprising. Or maybe not. I was glad for the end of the work day and after eating dinner, I ended up "resting my eyes" long enough to wake up and go to bed. Guess I was tired. Let's see how today goes. It's a minute until my usual time to start my routine of getting ready for work. Wish me luck! https://flic.kr/p/2pGWHz3 Thursday - 04 April I liked the way my post on Ireland worked out. Writing then later adding the pictures worked for me. Maybe I'll do that with my TWITL posts. Write (not everyday, apparently) then add random photos from that particular day. What do you think? Friday - 05 April Yes to Friday! I think I would have been tired this week even without having gone to Ireland but not this tired. I have felt so dragged at the end of every day this work week. I'm so glad it's Friday! The weather turned cold and gloomy and rainy yesterday and I think I loved it. It reminded me of Ireland! (Except it never hailed in Ireland while we were there.) I didn't mind the rain and having to walk through it for a couple of minutes yesterday. It wasn't a big deal. Gave me a good reason to wear a sweater yesterday. Workmates and I went out to lunch yesterday to celebrate a birthday. I ate all my food! I must have been hungry. CreAsian always hits a spot for me. https://flic.kr/p/2pHkCJY lunch https://flic.kr/p/2pHfGwm HBD CM! https://flic.kr/p/2pHpdz6 It's been awhile since I've really talked about baseball. Before I made this my blogging place, I used my other domain (moonlitjazz.com) as my blog and I used to talk baseball all the time. I'd post that day's game stats plus my thoughts on the game, if I happened to watch it or listen along. I've been a fan of the Oakland Athletics since I was a teenager and when Mark Mulder was traded to the St. Louis Cardinals, I became a Cardinals fan (much to the delight of the husband). I counted myself an A's fan first then Cardinals. If they ever matched up in the World Series, I was going to cheer for the A's, of course. https://flic.kr/p/avmwi3 2005 - now he's the manager of the A's! I was born in Oakland and spent the first few months of my life there before we moved to Alameda. When I was going to start second grade, we moved to San Leandro. My aunt used to watch baseball all the time and I scoffed a little about it because I was all about football and the Niners. But sometime in high school, I fell hard for baseball and the Oakland Athletics. It was the time of the Bash Brothers and the A's were exciting. My cousin, friends, and my sister and I would go to the games, just us, and we had a blast. I love baseball and I loved the A's because they were from my part of the Bay Area, the East Bay. (I was and still am mostly indifferent to the Giants and the best I can say about them is that I LOVE their stadium. I don't mind if they win, as long as it isn't against the A's or Cardinals.) The A's were my team and I loved their "small market" ways and when they were winning, it was so exhilarating. https://flic.kr/p/jB4vE from August 2006 We went to a lot of games over the years and I can even remember some of them but in the last decade, we've been lucky to go to one game a season. And I was fine with that. My love for baseball is constant but my attention not so much. And the A's couldn't seem to keep the players that caught my eye and it's been a constant turnaround with them. I never thought they'd really leave. When the talk about it started, I blamed the city of Oakland. But as I read more and watched more, I realized that it was the team owner making all the wrong moves. The team might be rooted in Oakland but the owner is rooted in the almighty dollar. I still blame Oakland (49%) for not doing more but the A's owner gets 51% of the blame. It's him for sure but does Oakland even deserve a team at this point? They lost the Raiders (not a big deal to me but...) and the Warriors. Now it's the A's departing. https://flic.kr/p/4Ky9kG 2008 This is the last season of Athletics baseball in Oakland. After this season, they'll be a Triple-A team in Sacramento. Wait, I mean they're going to be playing in a Triple-A facility. It'll be at least three years there. Maybe, if Las Vegas doesn't happen, Sacramento will become their new home. Maybe this is Sacramento's chance to say, "Hey, we can totally accommodate a Major League Baseball team. Come, make your baseball home here." Maybe I won't be so heartbroken if the A's end up in Sacramento permanently. At least they'd be in a place that's a drive away as opposed to a plane flight away. (And now I'm wondering what will happen if the A's somehow reach the post season and the World Series while calling Sacramento home. Will forces be at work to make sure that doesn't happen? Is that why the team sucks right now? Curious.) Right now, though, I am SO INFURIATED by the whole thing. It feels like an utter betrayal and my baseball heart is breaking. I don't blame the team, the players, the people who work for them. I blame the owner and Oakland. Maybe I'm angry at MLB too, for letting their greed dictate this move. I am sad for the team. I am sad for the players. And I am so sad for us, the fans. My love was constant even if my attention was not and now that love is being tested. https://flic.kr/p/2muJJ6y 2021 I love baseball. But do I still love the A's? Or will I focus all my baseball love on the St. Louis Cardinals? Stay tuned! Sunday - 07 April Here we are at Sunday already. We visited my parent yesterday and I was able to give them some stuff we picked up in Ireland. I used to complain about the weather in San Leandro and how cold it is in my parents' house but nowadays, I don't mind the bit of chill at all. The weather is going to change much too soon if the forecast is to be trusted. https://flic.kr/p/2pHU9Je The drive through Vasco was so green. The hills are still green, probably because of the chill and recent rain. I love seeing all that green. It reminds me of Ireland. It also makes me appreciate the natural beauty here. https://flic.kr/p/2pHSrje as seen on Vasco https://flic.kr/p/2pHUL1C burgers from In-N-Out - Bought tickets to see Tyler at the Hard Rock Sacramento in July. It feels like it's been so long since we've seen him. It'll be great to see him and catch up with some of the Rich's Bi$ches. ;) Hopefully we get to say hey to Tyler. - Sam Hunt has a new EP out, Locked Up. Listening to it right now. - We're going to the A's v Cardinals game the day after our anniversary (which is what led to me writing the baseball stuff earlier in this post). I thought about wearing my Cardinals jersey for the game but I'm going to wear my A's jersey. It could very well likely be our last time going to an Oakland Athletics game. We shall see... https://flic.kr/p/2pHUwKd me Read the full article

#a's #baseball #music #samhunt #tylerrich #TylerRich

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