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#denzo
realbeefman · 9 months
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made this for fans of the “these two white guys have 0 business behaving like That around each other” genre
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ghost-bison · 9 months
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was that supposed to be heterosexual
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splatooshy · 4 months
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tvdu headcanons
yes these are completely correct, no i do not take criticism. either compliment me and my clever thoughts or walk away.
damon
- pretends his initials stand for ‘damon fucking salvatore.’
- Humanity isn’t something Damon lacks. He ignores it sometimes, but he did that when he was human too
- shy. so PAINFULLY shy. that didn’t change until post 70s.
- fav colour is jade green.
- born in italy, then lily had multiple miscarriages over 5 years and giuseppe decided they would move to america for better prospects, and stefan was born in mf.
- giuseppe despised anything ‘foreign’, and would lock damon in the cellar when he slipped up. never mind that damon didn’t really know any english.
- named his first horse (a shetland pony) sir handsome. loved his horses. hated people, loved animals.
- bibliophile. brains over brawn.
- gets banned from new orleans every few decades. marcel HATES him. also was in nola in 1914, freya and kol both took pity on him/ befriended damon after he managed to piss off the witches AND marcel in one day.
- always had the most inconvenient crushes as a human. the first was the daughter of some middle class storekeeper when he was eight. the second was emily bennett (his secret bff) and the third was a dude with a horse when he was a teenager. stablehand/riding instructor/ young gent passing through, named sebastian. giuseppe caught the boys fooling around one day and promptly shot sebastian in the head, before beating damon within an inch of his life (WOAH I WROTE THIS SO CASUALLY). damon never fully recovered.
- finds grimoires to bring to his favourite witch at the time. often the spells are super wacky and mostly useless.
- chatty and clingy drunk.
- after augustines, physically cant sleep alone, and half the time wakes up only to realise he’s killed his bedpartner (strangling, decap., suffocation etc.)
- in the 30s, he became a professional dancer.
stefan
- fav colour is an icy, glacial blue.
- nobody knows what his first language is. His first few words were either Italian or French, but it’s not certain which one. of course, giuseppe locked damon in the cellar for that.
- first horse was sir handsome, a hand-me-down from damon. loved both people and animals, but most of all loved when damon was introducing him to the animals.
- actually the cutest little child ever. big green eyes and floppy blonde-ish hair. looked like a five-year-old until he was 13? 14? and then suddenly shot up really quick.
- bull in a china shop. brawn over brains.
- the ‘ripper’ was created by lexi. she isolated and abused stefan, manipulating him into whatever she wanted.
- chronic migraine sufferer.
- as a human, he physically could not eat when nervous, which just so happened to be 80% of the time.
- rarely gets drunk but is a very outgoing and slutty drunk.
- lizard brain blood lusty ripper stefan only speaks italian.
- model aeroplane / train / car kind of guy.
- tumbled down into a well twice as a human.
- built the engine for the first automobile, passed it onto henry ford.
enzo
- likes the challenge of getting his way without resorting to compulsion (which is cheating.)
- has the stickiest fingers. he didn’t become a little street urchin in london without picking up some skills.
- turned by jack the ripper in 1888. approached him mid-murder.
- physically incapable of hating damon. and believe me, he’s tried.
- after augustines, physically cant sleep alone, and half the time wakes up only to realise he’s killed his bedpartner (strangling, decap., suffocation etc.)
klaus
- went to college a few times to study art. ended up stabbing the teacher [with a paintbrush] because they critiqued his work.
- was tsar nicholas 2 as a joke, purposely ended the dynasty.
elijah
- slipped ecstasy into klaus’ drink in the 80s just to see what would happen.
rebekah
- had a habit of accidentally wandering as a kid.
- clairvoyant / clairsentient.
- very partial to throwing knives.
kol
- bffs with charles 2, gets knighted (inspired by that episode of parks and rec where ben and andy meet the rich british guy)
- refers to stefan as klaus’ estranged paramour
- mixes vervain and wolfsbane into joints and such to get klaus to chill the fuck out. and mixing vervain into other drugs and stuff so that they’d affect him - damon joins the operation in 1914.
- was jack the ripper in 1888, saw a man drowning in his own blood in an alleyway, just watching as kol disemboweled a prostitute, before approaching him like ‘please sir, can you spare any change?’ and kol was delighted.
- damon pissed off marcel in 1914 and kol decided at that moment they were best friends.
- BIG fan of the ottoman empire. it only collapsed because kol was daggered.
- has grimoires full of odd spells.
alaric
- owns vervain coated knuckle dusters
- basically begs damon to talk history with him.
elena
- pre-accident: queen bee and she knew it. at her core, she is self-centred and used to getting her way. this only changes with her parents’ accident, but eventually elena reverts back into her old self.
- refers to katherine as her identical grandmother
[ - bitchy stares. not even an rbf, her face is just super expressive and you can tell when she’s judging you ]
caroline
- was second to elena all her life, and elena knew how to fuel that envy of caroline’s. but then elena’s parents died and caroline was finally #1, except stefan shows up and it’s back to the elena show again.
[ - well-meaning but tone deaf ]
both elena and caroline are just those bitchy popular girls.
[ bonnie ]
[ i have so many for her but a lot are completely against canon so here’s the ones that could be ]
[ - best cheerleader on the squad // the older girls adopted her as their flyer from day 1 ]
[ - because she’s tiny, yanno? ]
[ - known as the ‘i dunno her but she seems nice’ one, the ‘quiet, seems really sweet but i think she hates me’ one and ‘elena’s minion’ ]
[ - but she’s actually more popular overall ‘cause she does all the volunteering / xtra curricular stuff with caroline and she’s not in your face about it ]
[ - has very weirdly specific daily rituals as to what she eats and when on which day (waffle wednesday), what pyjamas she wears, how her pillows are arranged, etc. ]
[ - she didn’t even notice she did all of that until she was at a sleepover and the other kid’s mum made a different breakfast to what she would usually have on that day and bonnie was like ‘hmm. i seem to be uncomfortable with this. why is that?’ but sucked it up and ate her breakfast without saying anything ]
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ak-rye-47 · 2 months
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looks like a cinnamon roll is a cinnamon roll
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Looks like a cinnamon roll will Give you a cinnamon roll...Cross them and see where the cinnamon roll goes next
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Looks like a cinnamon roll hides a gun in a cinnamon roll
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Looks like a cinnamon roll has already killed you for assuming they look like a cinnamon roll
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looks and Is begging you to assume they are a cinnamon roll.....killed a whole town once
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Looks like they could kill you will bargain using a cinnamon roll to get their way....won't hesitate if you don't
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Looks like a cinnamon roll can but won't kill you( you are not worth the effort, time and mental health to)
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Looks like a cinnamon roll _WILL_ kill you....then go out for cinnamon rolls
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Looks like they could kill you _WILL_ kill you too
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Then go out looking for cinnamon rolls for them
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alltid-og-for-evig · 1 year
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Val’s Birthday Bash! - Denzo/Klayley/Hizzie - (1/28)
You will always be every one of these
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crossedsabers10s · 4 months
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@splatooshy RIP shower scene, you shall be missed dearly
It ain’t done, but I do have the bones of some stuff:
I keep my heart under the floorboards (in the dark, far away from yours)
Amnesia trope. Damon thinks it’s sometime before canon starts—pre meeting Elena. Technically set during S5-6 but timelines meh
“Maybe we should untie him,” the girl with Katherine’s face says.
Who is not Katherine.
She had been very adamant about that one.
Despite looking just like her, knowing Damon’s name, and being a vampire.
Damon does his best to smile benignly at her from where he is chained to a chair in the middle of the Boarding House den. The rest of the furniture had been cleared back and away, leaving him the main attraction.
He’d woken up here, restrained and surrounded by strangers and slightly more familiar strangers.
There’s Not-Katherine—who smiles back at him, but it’s strained around the edges—orbiting around the room, around Damon at its center, but she never comes too close. Right now, she’s hovering next to one of the other girls.
The one Not-Katherine is standing next to is blonde. Baby faced with big blue eyes, she looks to be around Stefan’s age. She also, Damon knows just from her expression whenever she looks his way, hates his guts.
For some reason. That he can’t remember.
There’s another girl, one who looks just slightly older than the other two, who had been the one to pronounce him cursed upon entering the room and getting a good look at his aura or vibes or whatever it is that witches use to determine such things. She is both tiny and cute and gives him the impression that she is both capable and fully prepared to set him on fire.
His brother—one of those oh-so-familiar strangers—frowns Damon’s way when he sees him smiling at Not-Katherine. Probably (correctly) divining that he wants out of these chains and isn’t above seducing someone to do it. His hair is different from when Damon had last seen him, but that displeased twist of the lips is just the same.
The man lounging in the corner—blond and settled into his skin in a way that means old vampire, beware—is as unfamiliar as the witch and the blonde. Something about him and his bored amusement at the situation puts Damon’s teeth on edge.
[Tries to act innocent/uneasy to win sympathy. They all know him way better than he realizes. It doesn’t work.]
Plan A foiled, he settles in to people watch.
Elena-Who-Not-Katherine and Stefan are standing intimate-friend-or-more close to each other, speaking in hushed voices about a bunch of names Damon doesn’t recognize. Them being so up close and obviously cozy makes him want to frown. Or pry them apart with a crowbar. She may not be Katherine, but she looks exactly the same, and the scene is bringing back memories he’d rather forget.
Bonnie is trailing one finger over the pages of what Damon would put good money on being a grimoire.
That’s when Enzo walks in.
He glances Damon’s way, raises an eyebrow, then deposits the cloth-wrapped parcel he’d been carrying onto a side table beside the witch. He sets a steaming beverage down next to it.
Oh, Damon thinks, realizing something, watching Bonnie thank him before going back to her book.
He’s dreaming.
That’s it.
That explains everything.
Kind of a strange dream, but whatever. He’s had stranger.
He frowns down at the chains, trying not to wonder what Freud would make of his subconscious deciding on this.
“Why is Damon in chains?” a voice more familiar than the face it belongs to asks.
Damon would like an answer to that one too, but doesn’t want to soul-search to get it. He’d need a compass and maybe a map.
“Magic retrograde amnesia,” Caroline explains airly.
“Right,” Enzo’s voice says. “Of course, why wouldn’t it be? But the chains?”
[Exposition on how they ended up with Damon cursed. Damon, believing himself to be asleep, starts being more blatant in his escape attempts. He begins to injure his wrists trying to break the cuffs, rationalizing away the pain and blood as it being a realistic dream. He’s also beginning to dissociate, and the pain takes longer to register than the scent of blood mingling with Bonnie’s coffee.]
“If I unlock this,” he says, reaching for the chains like him unlocking them is a forgone conclusion, but is curious as to the answer anyway, “what will you do?”
This is, of course, where Damon promises not to harm a single hair on any of their heads. He’s going to school his face into—not earnestness, as they’d never believe that from him—but stoic agreement and swear to behave. It’s in his best interests to do so.
If this was a real situation and not a product of his fucked up brain, he might have.
“I don’t know,” he says, honesty raw as his wrists.
Enzo unlocks the chains.
[Damon stands up—except his body language is off. Enough so that the others notice. Moving too fast, blurring between motions and then being too-still.]
Staring Not-Enzo (It Can’t Be Enzo, Enzo is Dead, Damon Killed Him) dead (ha) in the eye, he bends his right index finger back until it’s pointing in the wrong direction.
He barely notices when half the room recoils at the sound.
“What was that for?” Enzo’s ghost asks him, unflinching.
Damon frowns at him, then down at his hand. He sharply twists the bone back into alignment.
He looks around the room, taking in an array of wary (Stefan and Bonnie), worried (Elena), and disgusted (Caroline) faces. Klaus is watching him like he’s a boring movie that has just become interesting enough to pay attention to.
The pain from that hadn’t worked either. He’s still dreaming.
“Damon.”
Unable to quite help it, Damon looks at his favorite nightmare. “Yes?”
Dark eyes drop down to where Damon’s finger is healing. He flexes his hand, finding it most of the way there. “Why?”
“I want to wake up,” he explains.
“Not that I don’t like seeing you—not hating me even!” he tacks on, lest he somehow hurt this dream shade’s feelings. He’s sick of hurting Enzo in his dreams. If he can avoid it, he will. “But I want to wake up now. Before the screaming starts.”
Or the smoke.
That’s what he remembers most. Not the fire. Not really. It’s the smoke. Thick in the air, in his throat, his nostrils, his lungs. Bodies beginning to burn and vervain-perfumed failure.
Dream-Enzo keeps his hands in his. It’s warm, bordering on hot, to Damon’s chilled fingers. He half expects the touch to begin to sear any moment now, or for Enzo’s visage to crumble away to ash. “You always do that?” he asks, dark eyes unreadable. Or maybe they are readable, and Damon just doesn’t want to read them. “Hurt yourself to wake up?”
Damon shrugs best he’s able. “If it works….”
Something about that slow nod, the understanding there in those eyes, makes him keep talking.
“Sleepwalking was the worst, but that didn’t last too long.” Only a measly year or two. What’s a year to forever? “Sleeping with people made it better, but I kept waking up to corpses in the beginning. Which, gross. Cleaning up a body first thing in the morning sucked.” When he bothered to clean them up.
The smile doesn’t quite reach those eyes—which are almost spot on, but there’s something different there, something new that doesn’t match his memories all the way; something about that hurts, that he can’t remember Enzo quite right, even while dreaming—but it’s close. “Shave, brush your teeth, hydrochloric acid?”
Damon flexes his fingers, regretting it when the dream takes that as a sign to have Enzo let go and step back. He doesn’t let that distance linger. This is his not-yet-nightmare, he’s going to milk it for all it’s worth. He captures Dream Enzo’s hands with his own, reveling in how lifelike this is.
Apparently, the action has surprised his own subconscious, because Dream Enzo blinks a little down at their entwined hands, one eyebrow briefly raising.
Blah blah blah—technically the scene ends with Damon having issues with his switch, fluctuating back and forth between too many emotions and suppressed ones.
I should prob finish it …at some point lol
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aka-efirg · 21 days
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“You’re trying to crush my rib cage.”
“Cuddle.”
“Cuddling does not involve broken bones. Nor asphyxia.”
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freddieslater · 9 days
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Also back in my denzo era, rip enzo you would’ve loved jaskier (and taylor swift) 💅🏻🔥🩶
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anewkindofme · 1 month
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"Everything is on purpose and no, it wasn't scripted."-Michael Malarkey
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the-11-doctor · 1 year
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diabolimeservavit666 · 7 months
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ghost-bison · 10 months
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That's it that's the show
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splatooshy · 4 months
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i was scrolling through muppets stuff, as i do rather often, and i found a whole bunch of stills that could be straight out of the muppire diaries.
so here are some concept shots for a muppets reboot of tvd.
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ak-rye-47 · 3 months
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Elena : * crying.... as always*
" I CAN FIX HIM!!!"
Enzo : *counting on his fingers*
" And i can make him beg, scream,moan,scratch, whine like a Whore whose rents due!! Whats your point?"
Stefan : *whispers, Fist to his mouth*
" Burrrnnnnn......"
Damon : * grabs popcorn*
Bonnie *massages temples*
" to early..... it's too early for this shit"
Enzo : " Correction! I DID make him beg , scream --"
Elena : *walking away*
" Ughhhh!!!! "
Caroline: " But what has THAT to do with fixing him?"
Enzo : " Oh i looked at him and went..... 'That guy can't be fixed, i can Fuck him though maybe that'll shut him, calm him down??'
Damon: * Sipping cocktail's*
Caroline: " well ... it's working?"
Elena : * distant sobing*
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alltid-og-for-evig · 6 months
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TVDU Halloween Fest - Day Seven: Party/Free
Maybe you and me we could take a ride You could be my Bonnie, I'll be you're C-C-C-C-C-Clyde If you've got an engine for revin', I'll be the throttle and the choke
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crossedsabers10s · 2 months
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pookers gimme some words
ive got a vague idea and half a scene?
its supposedddd to be for an AU where Damon and Enzo escaped at the same time in the fifties and eventually caught up with Maggie and Damon just third wheeled for so long it went full tricycle. Fast forward forever and boom sort of canon with a few allowances for Damon being slightly less murderer-y about trying to free Katherine:
It starts off with a brown paper package, innocent and nothing unusual. On her way into the Boarding House, Elena almost trips over it on her way to meet Stefan. Cursing and nursing her stubbed toe, she picks it up and takes it off the porch and into the house rather than leave it to the whims of the already gloomy looking sky. With one last glare, she leaves it on the kitchen counter. 
She promptly forgets about it, even when she and Stefan find another on the porch that afternoon, tagged with international stickers. Assuming Damon ordered something, they bring it in and go back to playfully debating the merits of modern versus older cinema. 
Then the boxes multiply. 
...
“Did a delivery truck throw up in here?” Jeremy asks, staring around at the army of packages covering just about every free surface of the den. Interspersed between antique furniture and every hoarded knickknack deemed worthy of display by various Salvatores sits cardboard containers and crates of various sizes. 
“Reverse robbery?” Caroline theorizes, toeing a particularly beat up looking box. Something inside rattles. She freezes, then slowly withdraws her foot. 
Yet another box under his arm, Stefan returns from answering the door. “I don’t know what’s going on,” he says, words coming out like he suspects that the plague of mystery boxes that has descended onto his house like brown paper packaged locusts will soon consume the entire town, “but I have spoken to way too many delivery people today.”
“I don’t know,” Bonnie says, sitting on a throne made of cardboard, feet kicked up on a crate. “That second to last guy was pretty cute.”
Stefan tosses the box onto a pile in the corner. “You can take over signing for things.”
Bonnie looks contemplative. 
“Have you opened any?” Caroline asks him, looking like she’s two seconds away from finding a box cutter herself. 
“No,” he tells her. “They’re not mine so….”
“They must be Damon’s,” Elena finishes for him, eyes on a sticker that declares one crate to be from Florence. 
“All the more reason to snoop,” Caroline informs them, picking up one of the smaller, shoe-boxed sized ones and shaking it. Nothing shatters, so whatever it is, it’s not easily broken. 
“Until he figures out we opened his stuff and gets his revenge,” Stefan says with the grim certainty of a younger sibling. 
“And it’s an invasion of privacy,” Elena points out. 
“Yeah, but,” Jeremy says, eyeing one of the biggest boxes in the room with unabashed interest. “Would Damon respect your privacy?”
Stefan pauses. 
Elena makes a face. 
Atop her throne, Bonnie snorts. 
Caroline laughs at the very notion. 
“No, actually,” Stefan says after a moment. 
Sensing victory, Caroline waves the box at him. 
He reaches out for it, obviously having deemed whatever revenge Damon will perform worth it. “Fair’s fair.”
Elena says something about not stooping to Damon’s level, but she makes no move to stop them. 
They all relocate to the kitchen, Stefan leading the way, prize in hand, everyone else following after with various levels of pretending not to be curious on their faces. It doesn’t take long to finish clearing a few stray boxes off the table. 
Stefan plops their prize slash possible doom down in the middle. They all crowd around it, snagging front row seats. Despite their curiosity, no one makes a move towards it, each of them just eyeing the perfectly innocent package sitting there. 
After a moment of this, Caroline says, “Someone open it.”
“You open it,” Bonnie tells her, squinting at the box like she’s checking for visible curses. It appears she finds none, as the box remains unblasted into oblivion. 
“What, no way! I mean. I think Stefan should open it.”
Stefan eyes her. “Why me?”
“Because if you open it, you have plausible deniability. They were delivered to your house.”
“I know they’re not mine. Damon will know I know that they’re not mine. Did I tell you about the time he replaced all the decor in my room with taxidermied animals while I slept? Because if I touch his stuff, he’s going to do worse than making me wake up right next to a squirrel forever frozen in agony.”
“Where did he even get all of those?” Elena says hauntedly.
“Wait, wait,” Jeremy says, “when was this? Is this before or after the time he stuck me fifty feet up a pine tree for breathing on his precious bourbon?”
Caroline talks over him. “You were ready to do it a minute ago!”
Stefan grimaces. “That was before I remembered the freaking mountain lion he put in my bathroom.”
From there they open the box to find a bunch of pics and stuff that are basically a lil timeline featuring Damon Maggie and Enzo--including Maggie and Enzo getting married where Damon's best man, a bunch of other cute pics, then eventually they find like. Smuttier ones.
“Pictures!” Caroline repeats, looking for all the world like all she’s missing are a string of pearls to clutch. 
“Did he know?” Elena asks, looking back at the wedding photos, every face in them smiling happily. “God, you don’t think Damon killed him, do you?”
They’re interrupted by Jeremy’s yelp. He slams the picture face down on the table, whites of his eyes visible. “I think he knew!”
“What?”
“Yeah,” Jeremy says, carefully not looking down at the table. “He knew, he definitely knew—hey, I think Elena was right, this is an invasion of privacy, maybe we should—uh. Stop.”
“Please tell me you didn’t find a picture of a corpse,” Stefan says flatly. 
Jeremy shakes his head, hair flopping. “Nope, no corpses. God, I hope there were no corpses.”
“Now I’m curious,” Caroline says. Before Jeremy can yank the photo away, she grabs it. “If Damon didn’t just kill the guy whose wife he was banging, then what—“ She trails off, eyes widening. 
Resigned, Jeremy says, “Vamp speed is cheating.”
Caroline’s not paying him any attention. The rest of the table watches in interest as her jaw drops, both eyebrows raised. She blinks once. Closes her mouth. 
“Well,” she says. Stops. Blinks again and tilts the photo to the side like it will make more sense that way. “Well. Uh. Hm.”
Bonnie starts, “What are you—“
Caroline shushes her. “I’m rearranging my world view, give me a second. You know, this actually explains a few things.”
“Explains what?” Jeremy asks. 
Caroline raises a few fingers. “That thing with Elijah. Whatever he had going on with Alaric—“
“What? No way—Ric’s not—“ Jeremy falters. “You don’t really think…?”
Caroline raises a brow at him. “Drinking buddies?” 
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