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winterarmyy · 8 months

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Thin Walls, Thin Lines

What will happen if a fuckboy falls in love with a hopeless romantic?

Summary: Modern society surely had corrupted the mind of the hundred-something year old man, Bucky Barnes, when he seemed to have forgotten the art of courting a lady. Lost in lust and pleasure, he had been indulging with endless array of different girls on his bed almost every night. And the opposite side of that thin walls of his room, lives a hopeless romantic who he was madly in love with.

Navigation: Original Version || Deleted Scene* (alt. ending)

Pairing: fuckboy!bucky x female!reader

Words: 4.9k++

Warnings: avenger au, explicit language/contents, angst, lil bit of drama, fluff, please bare with the fuckery of bucky barnes, reader is sensitive yet quite fiesty too. i can't backup steve on this one, he is on his own.

A/N: As you can see from the navigation bar, we have two different endings for this fic, because I am greedy and indecisive. The original version ended with fluff and the deleted scene (alternate ending) ended with absolute filth of a smut. So... enjoy! 💕

P/S: And this is also my submission for @jessybarnes 's writing challenge. I have chosen "Kiss me again" from the prompt list and I hope you like the way I used it in this fic!

Read my other works here: Masterlist

Y/N has always been a hopeless romantic. She dreams of a love like the ones she read in books. She craved someone who loves her so deeply that she could never find peace in anyone else but him. She wanted all the love songs and poetry to be reminders of him; his beauty, his charms.

Fresh flowers, stargazing, coffee dates, kisses that tastes of cotton candy, warm cuddles, and every little things in between; she longed for it all. She dreams of a love that is so consuming until all that's left in that small bubble of infatuation is their entangled soul mending each other to the bone.

That's what makes her a hopeless romantic.

And very much the opposite of her was Bucky. He is an infuriating flirt. There's not a day goes by that he doesn't call her with sickeningly sweet nicknames; doll, gorgeous, princess, darling, you name it. He will definitely drop some suggestive lines at any given chance and most of the time when she least expected.

He can charm anyone just by his presence, and if you're lucky enough to get one of his infamous smile; then you best believe that you won't be going home alone that night, or able to walk proper the next morning. He is the typical playboy you know and hate; very often she'll see different girl in his arms or on his bed. And that man seemed to not know when to stop. Sometimes, she do wonder if he ever got tired of sex. Because she knows for certain that he can go on and on for hours, daily.

"Fuck,, that's it. Spread your legs for me. Yeah, 'atta girl."

Speaking of the devil.

This has been recurring for months now. It seems like the man never sleep because his voice would always wake her up. She couldn't decide what was worse; between being forced to hear the sounds of the skin slapping, the bed creaking, him groaning and her squealing or being a super light sleeper that even a whisper in her room would jolt her awake.

Y/N let out an annoyed grunt when she swoop her head under the pillow, hoping to silenced the noises even just a little bit. Surprise; it didn't help at all. Her body cringed and her face contorted into a squint when she hear the other woman announcing her release as the headboard hits the wall a little harder, a little faster.

Bucky Barnes sure is a fuckboy but unfortunately for her, he is also the man she fell in love with.

She refused to show it, but lord knows how much her heart simply swell to the sight of his smile. Despite the flirtatious tendencies of his, there was something about him that attracted her like a magnet; or like a moth to a flame.

Maybe it was his old soul, or maybe because she saw glimpses of timeless charm in him; the way he moves, the way he gazes, and the way treated her. Nevertheless, it was such a devastating thing for someone like her to fall for someone like him.

The last thing she wanted in a man, is to look at her like she was just a good fuck and nothing more. She just couldn't imagine herself to be tied with someone like that. And Bucky was exactly that someone.

Y/N haven't been able to get more than 2 hours of sleep for months now. The lack of it had caused her to drastically lose physical strength and lately fatigue has been a constant presence as well.

So she decided to go the medbay to consult Dr. Cho about it. After running some tests, she sat her down for some Camomile tea as she went through the results, "It seemed like the severe lack of sleep had took a really heavy toll on you."

Y/N sighed as she place the tea cup on the back on the table, "Yes, I am well aware of that. That is precisely why I am here."

"Nightmares?" Dr. Cho speculated.

If the definition of nightmare is 'the moans of the man, that she had a crush on, fucking someone else next door' then, yes. She was having long and nearly endless nightmares for months now.

"Something like that." She lied.

"Then, I have some medication that I can prescribe to you. You should take it daily after dinner and..." Before Dr. Cho managed to finish her instructions, Y/N quickly asked, "Is it possible to fix me without meds?"

Dr. Cho frowned curiously, "Why wouldn't take meds? That's the quickest way to help for your situation, as far as I know." she asked.

This was not her first rodeo; she had troubles sleeping back when she was merely teenager. And the last time tried using meds, she ended up almost overdosed herself from it, "It's just... I prefer not to." she evaded.

Dr. Cho nodded understandingly before clarifying the current situation, "Well then, I'm sorry but there's nothing I can do for you. Though some research suggested that meditation routine before sleep can help. Or putting up some natural ambience like the sound of rain or waves--"

Y/N wasn't really listening after the first sentence. Because all she could thought of was how much longer she can bare with this and what will it take for her to finally snap.

Y/N was dying. At least it felt like it.

With her deprivation of sleep and the intense combat training she had to go through today, her patience was reaching it's limit. After visiting the medbay 2 weeks ago, she had tried to approach Bucky about it but he always took it lightly.

There was series of insincere apology followed by a cheeky promise to 'keep the tone down' for her. But nothing changed. She asked him again and again; days gone by he didn't live up to the end of his bargain.

For those past week, Y/N had resorted to sleep in the living room for most of the nights. How she dreaded to leave her comfy bed but she could no longer tolerate the sounds coming from the other side on the wall. Though she still jolted awake from time to time due to how uncomfortable it was sleeping on a couch, but at least she got more than 2 hours of sleep if she was to compare to the nights she slept in her own room.

It's not she didn't notice it at all; she knew exactly how and why it happened. The habit of microsleeping that she developed during the course of this training. The slowed reaction time, the lack of energy, she can feel it. But, there was nothing she can do about it.

The only cure for this was to get some rest. A proper rest. And that can't happened, not without Bucky's cooperation.

When Y/N was marching towards the sargent who was sitting way across the gym; she could see how his eyes undress every piece of her clothing, how his tongue rolled out and his teeth sunk into his lips.

She wasn't even wearing anything remotely provocative but here he was lusting over the way her hips sway especially when he was the one she's walking towards.

The moment she stood in front of him, his mouth lifted into a smirk, "Yes, princess. How may I be of your service?" His voice was sultry and the way he towers over made her slightly nervous for no reason.

Her heart fluttered, yet her lips refused to form a smile, "Don't call me princess."

"I apologize, my queen." Bucky gave her a cheeky smile.

Y/N didn't want to drag this any longer than she should, so she quicky jump into it and said, "So you know how I’m like-"

"-absolutely embarrassingly in love with me? Yes, I'm familiar go on." Bucky cuts in. If panic ever rose in her chest, then she was doing an incredible job of hiding it, "Can you just shut up for a second and take me seriously?"

His eyes glint with flirtaous mischief when he replied, "Doll, you know the fastest way to shut me up is to kiss me."

Y/N simply sighed before she began to rant, "I really don't have the mood for this banter with you, Barnes. I just want you tone down your nightly routine. It is because of you I've been having trouble sleeping and--"

He quickly stopped her before she nags even more than she already did, "Okay, okay I get it. We've been through this, doll." Bucky's face lit up when he suggested, "How about I help you sleep, hmm? I may know a thing or two about tiring someone out." There was surely something unholy in those steel blue eyes of his.

And Y/N picked it up rather quick, but considering the amount of times he had insinuate something more than just a friendly banter, then of course she knew exactly what he was suggesting, so she simply replied, "No offense, Barnes. But, I don't do one night stand or no strings attached thing. And with a manwhore like you? No, thank you." sassy was her answer.

Bucky's head tilted back as he laughed, then when he spoke his voice was like a devil luring an angel to sin, "Oh babydoll, if I were to be a whore, it'll only be for you." He stepped closer so that only she can hear his confession.

His masculine scent hits her nose, mixture of the citrus cologne and his natural odour was just perfect. Annoyingly alluring; but perfect. And it took all her will to hold it together and blatantly rejects him, "Still not interested."

Bucky groaned in protest, "Come on, princess. You can't keep dreaming for some prince charming to court you, do you? You know that's probably never going to happen right?"

Surely he meant only to tease her; that it was less likely that an actual prince to romance her. Not that she did not deserve the world; she does. And Bucky was more than will to burn it to the ground if that's what she wanted.

But, Y/N didn't see it that way. She thought that Bucky meant that she is not worthy enough for a decent man to court her with respect and chilvary; that she was just a toy fit for fucking and nothing more. And the fact that her "insomia" had affected her usually high patience and reduced it to almost paper thin, it was only fair for her to finally snap.

She can tolerate his endless flirtation but she can't simple turn a blind eye for his insult.

Bucky was caught by surprise why Y/N harshly grabbed him by the collar, pushing him back and nearly stumbled; her eyes was pure fire when she growled, "Don't you dare mock the way I value relationship, Barnes." Her nose flared with anger and the commotion has attracted some prying eyes towards the two.

"Just because you enjoy fucking anything that breathes, that doesn't mean that everyone else does." She seethed, "The only cock that will be wrecking my pussy would belong to someone I love and if you have a problem with that, you can fuck right off." She forcefully pushed him until his ass landed on the bench behind him.

Her feet stomped all throughout her exit out of the gym, leaving Bucky in a blinking confusion.

He knew it was wrong.

It felt good. It felt right.

But, it was so fucking wrong.

To keep moaning Y/N's name when he railed those strangers to heaven; when he came so hard into the thin layer of condom. And it was always a soft and slow type of whimper, right in those girls' ears. So intimate, so careful not to let his secret out; knowing how thin the walls between him and the love of his life.

But, he certainly didn't care about the girl he was fucking. If it wasn't for his heavy body pinning her from behind, she would've elbowed him right in the guts for moaning another woman's name. Unfortunately for him, she quickly ditched and see herself out after the first round.

Now, he laid there; naked and bare. Thinking of how he simply couldn't help it. How could he not think of Y/N all the times? Not when he was deeply, helplessly in love with her. But, he knew she wouldn't bat an eye at him now that he had the reputation of a "fuckboy", as the young ones describes it. She especially made it clear today at the gym. She's never going to give him a chance now.

Not when she's a hopeless romantic. And the fact that he too was once the same was just aggravating to him. He was such a gentleman decades ago; before Hydra, before the war, when he was but a young man living Brooklyn.

His Ma had really shaped him into the perfect gentleman; every parents in the neighbourhood wanted him as their son-in-law. They claimed he would make the perfect husband for their daughters. But, things are different now. And he knew that the man he was before was long forgotten.

It was just curiosity at first; about how sex works in the 21st century. However, Bucky quickly fall into the promises of lust and pleasure; changing girls like changing clothes. He let himself dosed in ecstasy, as if it was a drug to silenced the dark and haunting memories of his past, like it was a quick escape from reality, from the Winter Soldier.

Then, Y/N happened.

Bucky never saw it coming; but, he fell. Hard.

They were colleague for years and had been a good friend he can rely on besides Steve. She was so sweet and pretty. Probably the most gorgeous woman he ever laid his eyes on, in the hundred something year old life of his. Most importantly, she was kind and patient and strong and fierce yet so unforgivingly selfless.

But that didn't matter now, does it? Especially when she despise him. And it was all because of the unholy title he held.

At first Bucky didn't notice it, but now that he stepped closer into the living room, he heard it again. The rustling fabric, the quiet whimper coming from the sofa. His steps were as careful as a wolf on a hunt, stalking a hiding prey in between the trees.

If Bucky were to guess what he would find on a late night trip to the kitchen, he would've probably said 'ice cream' and not 'Y/N sleeping in the living room'. His eyes briefly raked her sleeping figure, curling uncomfortably into the pastel purple blanket. Then at the scattered pillows on the floor around her.

Why was she sleeping in the living room?

Another whine passed her lips and his attention was locked on her frowning face; it seemed like she was having a bad dream. Bucky carefully crouch next to her, and ravel in her beauty. Such delicate features, long lashes, pretty freckles across her nose, and those soft looking lips; he would kill just to taste her them, to sink his teeth in between them.

It worried him though; to see her sleeping here. She was clearly uncomfortable, it was a mystery that she managed to even fall asleep in the first place. Bucky suspected she simply passed out due to today's training. It was particularly hard, even for him. Let alone a normal human being like Y/N.

Not to mention the fight that they had.

Then, it clicked. The complains about how she had trouble sleeping. It wasn't just to make fun of him or tease him in any way. It was a plead. She needed to be heard and he completely blew her off with jest and jokes.

"Was it because of... me?" Bucky thought to himself. It all made sense now, "Shit." A curse rang in his mind when he bit the insides of his cheek. He was mad at himself. How could he be so insensitive? And he claimed to love her? Please. What an absolute piece of shit he was.

When Y/N began to toss and turn, her blanket fell from her body. Even in her sleep, the cold managed to catch her. She instinctively curled towards herself, seeking warmth but was no avail.

She look so small and Bucky felt a surge of need to cuddle her close, keeping her safe, keeping her warm in his arms. But if he does that, he'd probably get kicked in the nuts. So instead, he picked up the fallen blanket lay it back across her whole body; carefully not to disturb her sleep.

Bucky smiled softly when she snuggled into the fabric and before he walked away, he swore to stop this corrupting habit of his and apologize for being such a douchebag to her. And if he's lucky, maybe he could even properly court her.

But for now, he just needed to go through tommorrow's mission. So does everyone one else in the team.

"Do you realized what you have done?" Not matter how hard he tried to hold it back, everyone in the Quinjet can see how Steve was seething.

Y/N's lost of sleep had took a toll on her more than she realized now that it had affected her performance in mission. She tried to ignore the way she was basically seeing Steve's feet multiply by the second, and continued to look down in shame, "I'm sorry, Captain."

"Don't apologize to me. Nat's the one who got shot because of you!" He yelled as he pointed at the red haired woman at the side of the plane.

No matter how much she wanted to blame Bucky on this; how he literally robbed her from fulfilling her human needs to rest at night, but she just couldn't. It was her fault that Natasha got hurt. If she was more alert, she would've seen the enemy standing right in front of her. If she was awake enough, then Natasha wouldn't get hurt.

Tears threatened to form when she looked over at her dear friend, bleeding at the side, "I'm so sorry, Nat. I really am. I didn't know what came to me and I--"

"Oh please, I'd take a bullet for you any day of the week, honey." Natasha swiftly cuts into her apology, in attempt to diffuse the heated situation.

But, Steve totally disagree with her, "Don't make this 'okay', Nat. You almost died because for her carelessness. Being inadequate shouldn't be okay for any agent to do. It is extremely reckless and downright stupid."

There was a sound of a distant gasp from the pilot pit, "Language!" Tony was clearly trying to lighten up the mood but it failed rather miserably when no one reacted.

Steve had every right to be mad, especially when his girlfriend was injured because of this, but oh does it hurt to hear his stabbing words. It hurts more when it comes from the Captain America himself.

God, she was extremely tired.

Physically, mentally and that's what happens when a person is lack of sleep. Then when she thought about all her hardwork and struggles to train amongst the superhero themselves, she couldn't help but to crack; and the tears that was building up in her eyes finally fell.

When Steve saw it, he lost it completely, "Oh, you're gonna cry now? WOW. Real mature, y/n. You can't disappoint me more can you?" At that point, he was being a little too mean for anyone's liking.

Especially Bucky.

So Bucky slowly pulled Y/N back, and shielded her body behind his as he went on face to face with his bestfriend, "That's enough, Steve." He warned but Steve doesn't seem to get the idea, "No, Buck. Do you see--"

Bucky took one step closer, his menacing glare went right through Steve's soul, "I said... that's enough." He repeated his words. This time the message went through.

Steve gulped and cleared his throat as he waved a dismissing hand, "I expect a full report and a letter of apology from you when we get back, y/n." He ended his sentence with his back turned and then walked away towards his girl.

When Bucky turned around to face Y/N, she was but a crying mess. Tears kept streaming down and her lips quivered in so much sadness. Now, that she was in the light, Bucky could see the darker shades on the bag of her eyes.

This was his fault. If he just stopped goofing around and listen to what she had to say yesterday, she wouldn't need to go through this, "Oh sweetheart..." though he meant to call her in his mind, it might just slipped through his lips.

Y/N glared up at him, "This was none of your concern, Barnes." She spat.

He shrugged, "Well, lucky for you, I don't care whose it is. What I know is I care about you. Now, let's get that wound patch up." Bucky simply said, and that was when she realized that her ribs were slashed open, bleeding and torn. Maybe it was not too deep, that was why she didn't notice it.

But it is an injury nonetheless, and it was a surprise to her that Bucky noticed it. "I don't want your help." She frowned yet continued to sniffle.

"Yeah, but you need it." He replied as he carefully tucked the loose strand of her hair behind her ears.

Unable to think of any comebacks, she let her fatigue win over. Her lips shut tightly and her chest shuddered for breaths. And when Bucky took her hand in his and lead the way, her body instantly responded by gripping him tight.

Bucky's heart soared at the touch of her small hand in his, while fire was burning in hers.

She hates him. She hates how caring he can be. She hates how soft he was when handling her. And she hates how easy it was for him to make her fall for him even more.

Y/N's body quickly went on auto pilot; she let him undress the blood soaking top and patch her wounds. And Bucky let her cry her heart out on his shoulder all the way back home to New York.

That night when everyone had settled back to their own rooms, Y/N was prepping to sleep outside again. It was like a schedule for Bucky to always fuck whatever his frustrations out when they finished a mission.

And she doesn't want to hear any of it. Not tonight.

Thankfully, her wounds were mostly healed thanks to Dr. Cho and her ingenious of a machine, Cradle. That thing fixed the teared tissue right up with its regenerative functions.

Now, Y/N just needs to endure the bruises but those are bearable. What she couldn't bear is the lack of energy and goodnight's sleep. She wished to just pass out for days and not wake up even if a prince came to kiss her to wake.

And she knew that sleeping in her room won't give her that.

Y/N piled her pillows and blanket on top of another before scanning the room one last time to make sure she didn't leave anything behind. Because she was not planning to step foot in her room until dawn comes, hoping the sounds from the other side of the room died down by then.

When she was walking pass Bucky's, she noticed how awfully quiet his room was, but she didn't think about it too much. She waited for the elevator to open its door only to reveal the man himself, "Barnes."

He eyed how Y/N's figure almost hidden behind the piles of pillow in her hold. He stepped out as he asked, "Where do you think you're going?" Bucky knew exactly where but he was not having any of that.

It was weird to her that she didn't see any sign or Bucky's hook-up in his arms, but she bet that there will be one after she's gone downstairs, "Away from you, that's for sure." She said, taking a step into the elevator but instantly stopped the moment Bucky blocked her path.

Bucky lips flatten against each other; he didn't say anything, he only frowned down at her then simply grabbed her wrist and dragged her back to her room.

Utterly confused, "What are you doing? Hey, let go of me." She twisted her wrist in his hold, while trying to balance the pillows from falling. A useless trial it was; because who could even escape that metal grip of his.

Bucky quickly respond, "No. You're not sleeping on that shitty sofa tonight." He stopped in the middle of the corridor and turned to her, "You're injured, y/n. You need on a proper rest on a proper bed." He coaxed.

How did he know that she had been sleeping on the coach? She thought before saying out loud, "I'm fine, Barnes. It's not even that deep of a wound, the Cradle fixed it clean. So, can you just... let go of my hand?" She sighed.

But Bucky refused to even spare her a glance, he silently tug her and stomp his way towards her room. There waa retaliation on her side, but his lack of response had lead Y/N to her defeat. She begrudgingly followed his long strides until she they stood by her bed.

He snatched each of the pillows and blankets off her hands, while Y/N simply blinked speechlessly as she watched Bucky started set up her bed like he had been doing it everyday.

Weirdly, at times like this, she found him extremely lovely. There was no corny and flirty comment about her, or his annoying habit of teasing every little thing she does.

There was just a comfortable silence and a kind gesture; the type that pulled the red strings of her heart just enough to make her want to dream of him.

Fucking hell, she can't believe that he managed to do that again! Making her fall for his antics. He really needs to stop doing that, it's simply rude.

Y/N broke from her love struck trance when she felt his cold metal laced around her hand again, he pulled her closer, "Now hop on, bunny. You need to rest." He lead her under the blanket and she grumbled curses under her breath, something about he need stop calling her weird nicknames like that.

When she was well tucked in and comfortable, Bucky sat at the edge of the bed by her side and spoke, "I'm sorry. For not trying to listen to you at the gym yesterday. I was a jerk."

His apology was so sincere that Y/N caught herself in a shock. Who is this man? What has he done to Bucky Barnes?

His eyes lingered to the wall behind her bed as if he was trying to find the right words to address it, "About the noises..." he trailed, "...it'll stop from now on."

Oh. Nevermind. She liked this Bucky. She wants to keep him forever, "Really? You mean it?" There weren't any effort put to hide her excitement when her voice nearly squeaked.

Bucky chuckled amusingly at her reaction, "Really, doll. But, you gotta promise not to sleep on the couch again."

Sparks of joy filled her chest when he confirmed his decision. Sure, it was such a small favour to do to anyone. But, she appreciate his efforts to make amends. "Hmm, I promise." She hummed happily, blinking slow as the comfort of her bed lured her into a drowsy state.

"Thanks, Bucky." Her mentioned his name.

Thank god for the super sensitive hearing ability, cause Bucky surely love the sound of her voice whispering his name so softly, "For apologizing or for tucking you to sleep?" He jest.

It only made her eyes rolled to the side and a smile spread across her face, "Both." she said. "And for what you did on the jet."

Bucky simply shrugged as if it was a normal thing to do. But, it wasn't. It was rare for him to challenge Steve like he did. And he did it for her, "Really, I owe you one." She said assuringly.

A playful smirk pulled on Bucky's lips when he spoke "Doll, you shouldn't be saying that so carelessly. Who knows I might use it for despicable things." Surely, he love to be the cause to bloom those red shades on her cheeks.

But it didn't happened when she asked quietly, "Will you?"

And the silence that came after was heavy with tenderness while their eyes spoke the truth to one another. As the thin lines in between got blurry, for once, there was just streams of genuine feelings pouring out of them, leaking through and contaminating the air with its magic.

Would he? Take advantage of her?

How could he though? He loved her too much to even think of purposely hurting her. "No." Bucky replied as he leaned down and placed a sweet kiss on her forehead, "Sleep well, princess." He mumbled against her skin.

And he pulled back, he grinned a cheeky smile. There it was; the pink blush on her face, wide surprise of her eyes and her slightly parted lips. She looked so adorable. He swore couldn't get enough of it.

"Kiss me again..." she nearly growled, but her blushing on her face didn't indicate anger, "...and I will choke you in your sleep." Though it was an attempt to threaten but typical of Bucky to just love to turn things around, "Hmm, is that an invitation, princess?" He purred and stole another kiss; this time, on her cheek. "Then, I will be looking forward to it." He whispered as quickly as he removed himself from the scene.

When he found his own bed, he couldn't help but to laugh at the muffled scream coming from the opposite side of the thin walls, "James. Fucking. Barnes!!!"

End.

Alternate ending (smut edition): Deleted Scene >>

Read my other works here: Masterlist

A/N: I hope you drop some thoughts behind before going to the deleted scene. Which I know you will. See you on the other side 👀

#jessybarnesreaches500 #bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #avenger!bucky #fuckboy!bucky #bucky fluff #bucky barnes fluff #thin walls thin lines au

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pitchsidestories · 8 months

Text

Safe and sound II Lucy Bronze x Reader

a/n: based off this request. We hope you enjoy this one.

pairing: Lucy Bronze x Wiegman!Reader

warnings: mentioning of injury and pregnancy

barcelona women masterlist

Pre-match tv -interview Sarina Wiegman before the CL Final Wolfsburg vs. Barcelona

Interviewer: Thanks for your time, Sarina. Excited for the fact that the CL Final is in your home country?

Sarina Wiegman: Very. The Dutch love women’s football.

Interviewer: chuckles We can tell, the atmosphere is already great. Happy to see two of your English players in the starting lineup?

Sarina Wiegman: can’t help but smile Yes, of course. I think it shows their quality.

Interviewer: smiling back You seem very happy too.

Deleted scene of the interview

Sarina Wiegman: blushes shyly I am. I just got the news that I’ll be a grandma soon. Oh..

Interviewer: Oh but that’s fantastic!

Sarina Wiegman: laughs nervously I wasn’t supposed to tell that yet. Can we leave that out?

Interviewer: Of course. Congratulations though.

Sarina Wiegman: Thank you.

Interviewer: No, thanks to you, I know you’re a very busy person.

Sarina Wiegman: Hopefully not too busy to spend time with my grandchild.

Interviewer: I’m sure you’ll find the time for that.

Sarina Wiegman: I’ll make some time.

Noisily Lucy Bronze tapped on the shoulder of her England Coach: “Time for what?” “Hi Lucy.”, cheerful Sarina Wiegman turned around to greet her football player. With a huge grin on her face the defender hugged the smaller woman:“ Hey, good to see you.”

“Is it just me or do you keep getting taller?”, Sarina sked her jokingly. With a mischievous smile Lucy decided to mock her coach:“ Maybe, you’re just getting smaller.” “Sure, Lucy”, the dutch woman responded by rolling her eyes. Jokes about her height were getting old in her opinion.

You’ve been following the conversation from afar but now decided to join in by telling her: “No, you’re right mum, she’s been standing even taller since the news.”

“She does, right?”, your mother sharing the observation of yours with an amused look on her face. While you agreed on that matter with her, your girlfriend proudly slang an arm around your waist: “Definitely.”

“As if you weren’t happy about it.”, Lucy said to Sarina laughing, her green eyes sparkling with happiness.

”I am happy.“, Sarina admitted. Lucy raised her eyebrow in a 'Told you so' manner. You glanced from your mum to your girlfriend, rolling your eyes in amusement, ”Guys!“ ”What?“ ”Calm down, the news aren‘t out yet.“, you reminded them.

Lucy nodded, ”Right.“ ”Actually…“, Sarina started but you didn‘t have time to hear her out. With a glance at the time you grabbed Lucys upper arm, ”Oh shit. We need to get ready. See you after the game, mum.“

Sarina smiled gently at the two of you, ”Of course. Good luck. And don‘t come back without the Champions League title.“ ”Don‘t worry. We‘ll bring this one back to Barcelona.“, you reassured her, cheerily. ”I‘m sure about that.“

After changing into your jerseys and warming up, you found yourself in the tunnel of Eindhovens stadium. Lucy was standing right behind you. You felt her warm breath against your ear as she whispered, ”Be careful out there, okay?” You didn‘t look back, you just nodded, ”Okay.“ Slowly, your girlfriend took a step back and clapped her hands, ”We‘ve got this.“

You were full of excitement and impatience as you stepped out on the pitch. When the first whistle blew, you were bouncing on your toes, ready to fight for the champions league title. But it took your opponent Wolfsburg only three minutes to score the first goal, the second one followed right before the half time. This was not the start you all were expecting to this very important game.

But during the half time talk it was clear that none of you would let this first half get you down. Lucy caught your eyes in the dressing room, giving you a small smile and a defiant nod. You felt ready and energized stepping back out, wanting to do your part to lead your team to a win.

It felt like a miracle to you, only a couple of minutes into the game and you've got the chance to score a goal. Way too late you realized that Alexandra Popp crashed into you, as you both fell to the grass. Quickly the german striker got on her feet again while you stayed on the ground.

The first teammate who ran to you your side was Lucy, offering her hand to help you up aswell:" Hey, are you alright? Let me help you."

"It hurts.", you whinced, feeling the pain taking over your whole body. Worried your hand went automatically to your stomach, scared for the baby inside you.

That's when your girlfriend lost her usual calmmess and started to panic:"Shit. We need the medical team, here!" "Lucy, calm down, it did not look too bad.", Keira tried to reassure the defender.

Devastated Lucy shouted:"You don't get it, Kei!" "No, because you two refuse me to tell what's going on.", the red haired midfielder answered cooly. Nervously Lucy went with one hand through her dark hair, unloosing her head bun in one angered swipe:"Not now."

"Girls..", you tried softly to stop them from arguing. In a tone which did not let you dare to disagree your girlfriend said: "You need to get off the pitch."

To the doctor who was taking care of you she demanded, her worry dripping through every word:"You need to check her thoroughly." "Lucy, we know how to do our job properly, but you need to let go off her hand now.", the doctor answered slightly annoyed by her clinginess to you.

Under her breath Lucy stated angrily:" Don't tell me how to treat my girl!"

"See you later, it's going to be okay.", you tried to calm her down.

”I‘ll come check on you as soon as the game is over.“, Lucy promised, her mouth pressed into a thin line. You gave a silent nod and let the doctor help you back inside to the treatment rooms of the stadium.

As the doctor assessed you, you heard fans cheer several times but you couldn’t make out who scored. Time didn‘t seem to pass at all in here.

At last, you heard the final whistle being blown and the fans erupting into a roar celebrating their teams success. But you still didn’t know who whose it was.

Lucy didn‘t even stay to celebrate with her teammates when the game ended. She stepped off the pitch and was on her way to the dressing rooms, when Sarina called her name, ”Lucy!“

”No, I don‘t know anything yet, Sarina.“, she replied and stopped only reluctantly. Her coach nodded in understanding and took a step towards Lucy, ”Congratulations on winning though.“ ”Thanks.“ ”You don‘t look happy about it.“, Sarina noticed.

Lucy just shook her head with slight anger, ”Are you seriously surprised about that?!“ ”No. Sorry.“, she replied quietly. With a deep sigh, Lucy calmed herself down and offered, ”Do you want to come with me to see how she is?“ ”I do.“

Both women walked silently side by side through the corridors until they reached the treatment rooms. Sarina stopped and gestured towards the door, ”You can go in first.“ Lucy mumbled a thanks before entering the room.

You looked up, trying to read your girlfriends facial expression, ”Lucy, did we win or lose?“ ”I‘ll tell you when you tell me if you’re okay.“ Lucy sat down next to you. Carefully, you took her hand in yours, ”We‘re okay, Lucy.“ Her eyes were still full of worry as she studied your face, ”Both of you?“

"Yes?", Lucy asked anxiously not trusting the good news yet. With an inviting smile you padded on the free side of your bed:"Luce, come here." "I'm glad you're okay.", she sighed in relief.

Impatiently you tapped her shoulder: "Will you tell me now who won?" "We did. We're champions leauge winners.", she proudly kissed the top of your blonde head.

A bright smile appeared on your lips: "That's amazing." "It's more important that you two are alright.", the defender pointed out in a serious tone.

"But you should not miss out on the party, love." Stubbornly Lucy answered:"I don't care about the party."

"And we don't care about that either.", Sarina and Keira explained while entering the room. Moved you looked at them: "Mum, Kei.." "How are you?", the lionesses coach asked clearly worried.

Quickly you tried to soothe her by saying:"I'm alright." "I'm glad you're. That looked really bad.", you're mum replied. Sternly Keira agreed:"It really did." "They're both okay.", Lucy stated.

Excited the midfielder looked between the defender and you:" They? You're going to be mums?! We need to celebrate that."

"That took you a lot less longer than I expected.", your girlfriend laughed. Immediately you interfered, smirking:" Don't be rude to her, she's like my sister!" "She knows I'm just kidding.", Lucy grinned.

Thrilled Keira clapped her hands:"I do, let's celebrate!"

#woso x reader #lucy bronze x reader #lucy bronze #lionesses #engwnt #woso #woso imagine #fc barcelona femeni #barcelona femeni x reader #woso one shot #woso fanfics #keira walsh

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zorrasucia · 2 months

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"Just sleeping and fucking all day," I AM DEAD!!! and i revived just to BEG you to expand on this please i just love them so much 😭

I'm so glad you liked it, Anon! I came up with something but I'm like 90% sure it's not what you were asking for - I aimed to write more smut and it turned into saccharine fluff somehow. I apologize. Rest assured that the next update for this fic is business as usual, very spicy and contains Carmy finally ******* ****** :)

Teach Me Tonight - Deleted Scene 2.0

[Part 1] [Part 2] [Part 3] [Deleted Scene] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6] [Part 7] Deleted Scene: [Part 8]

Reader x Carmy Berzatto (The Bear FX)

Rating: Mature (1k)

Tags: Set sometime after the opening of The Bear, Smut, Virgin!Carmy, Fluff, Miscommunication, Domesticity

"Hey, baby," Carmy mumbled with a smile, rolling over in bed and looking at you with sleepy eyes.

You had padded into the room and leaned over to kiss his neck, waking him up from his third nap of the day. In between, you had fucked - slow and loving, then quick and hard, then a mix of both. You felt tired in the best way - and still somehow you wanted him. But you could wait.

"Shhh. I'm not here for another round," you soothed, moving a lock of hair out of his face. "Got us some pizza," you settled across from him, laying the box between you.

He sat up and ogled you shamelessly. You were wearing jeans and one of his shirts, your nipples showing through the white fabric.

"You're gonna be the death of me," he shook his head and focused on the slice of pizza you handed him instead.

"I mean," you gestured at him, his naked torso and satisfied smirk, "likewise, Carm."

You shared a hungry look while taking a bite of pepperoni. He broke first, looking up at the ceiling, away from you.

"How's it feel?" he asked.

"Mmm?" you nudged his leg with your foot.

"You come like two, three times when I can only do one and be just useless..." he blushed, curiosity tinting his skin. "I was just wondering what that was like, if all women were like that."

You smiled. Sometimes you forgot that he was a virgin before you.

"A lot of women can, uh, come multiple times," you explained. "If it's done properly, if you work for it," you cleared your throat. "Some women can't come at all."

"That sounds, uh-" Carmy struggled.

"Miserable?" you supplied and he nodded. "It can be. But sex isn't always about coming, you know? It's about being close and getting to know each other."

Carmy hummed pensively.

Just now, between one round and the next you had fallen asleep still intertwined, spent, his arms around your waist and his softening cock inside you. It was nice, to be so close with zero expectations of it going anywhere.

"What've you learned about me? With sex, I mean," he asked, his blue eyes wide.

"That you're giving, uh, determined, a fast learner," you pondered for a minute while you chewed. "A bit of a control freak but we knew that from before," he chuckled. "And you think you don't deserve good shit, even though you do."

"Pretty spot on," he let out a shaky breath.

You caressed his calf over the bedsheets. It felt strange to be talking about this but it had been a fucking weird day, and discussing orgasms with Carmy while eating pizza fit right in.

"You're a great fuck, Carm," you said softly. "And that takes patience and care and- I love that you want to make me feel good. I do," his gaze was downward and you reached for his hand. "I just don't want you to think you need to be perfect for me here too, you know? There's no pressure."

Carmy nodded and his eyes met yours, he gave you a soft smile.

"Thanks," he brushed your knuckles with his thumb. Then his smile turned mischievous. "Just to be sure, you do like coming though?" he looked for confirmation, head tilted.

"Yeah," you laughed. "Obviously, yeah," you poked at his side and reached for another slice of pizza. "I'm just saying there's no pressure, okay?"

"Okay," he took a big bite of crust. "You didn't answer my question from before," he prompted, raising his eyebrows. "How does it feel?"

"Uh. Well, you don't know how good it's going to be until you're coming. Sometimes it slows down, becomes softer. Or you get halfway through the next and get stuck there," you shrugged. "Sometimes it builds up, becomes more intense each time-"

"Like the last one?" he asked.

You blushed - the memory of him on top of you, his chain dangling near your mouth, his hands holding your wrists above your head, taking up all your thoughts. He had fucked you through your first orgasm until you saw stars and your moans turned into cries of pleasure.

"Exactly like that," you replied bashfully like it wasn't you that had begged him to keep going and fuck you harder.

"How many have you done?" Carmy asked after a while.

"Huh?"

"How many times you've come in a row?" he repeated, that calculating look back on his face. "What's the max?"

"I don't know, five?" you laughed nervously. "I think you're getting the wrong message from this, Carm."

"No, I know," he shook his head. "I was guessing we could start with all that 'no pressure' thing tomorrow. And I think I still have one more round left in me today, so..."

"What the fuck, Carm?" you giggled.

You covered your face with your hands, hiding how flustered you were.

"I'm serious," he said, amusement still showing in his tone. You finally uncovered your face and looked at him. He was smiling but he wasn't joking. "I don't know how to be calm," he explained. "I don't know how to fucking relax and be normal. I never have. Being with you- That's the closest I've come to that," he said softly. You cupped his face tenderly. "But sometimes it gets so crazy that the only thing I know I can do well is make you feel good. That's why I can be a control freak and competitive and insane..."

You shushed him.

"You're fine, baby," you caressed Carmy's shoulders, scooting closer to him. "I love that you're all those things. I just- You push yourself to the limit. You can hurt yourself trying to make everything perfect," your thumb traced the edge of the dark circles around his eyes - all from early mornings and late nights at The Bear. "I don't want to be that for you - another weight, another thing that needs to be perfect."

"You're not," he whispered. "You've never been that, okay?"

"Okay," you sighed and surged forward to kiss him, his face between your palms.

Even after the kiss was over you stayed there, your forehead on his, and your noses touching.

"So," you said after a while, "how about we finish this," you pointed at the pizza, "and watch a movie?"

You had learned that watching a movie with Carmy was shorthand for a nap on the couch since he was always so fucking tired.

He chuckled against your mouth.

"I think I can manage that," he replied, guiding you by the hand to the living room.

[Part 8]

@th3h0nkz @faephoria @wadupppp

#replies #carmy x reader #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto fanfiction #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x you #carmy x you #carmy berzatto smut

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annymation · 1 month

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My Thoughts On Wish Deleted Scenes

Now that we got all the deleted scenes out, I thought it would be fun to share my thoughts on them... Mostly rant, yeah, I might get pretty heated with this heheh but it'll be fun.

Villain Couple

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So let's begin with my personal favorite, the villain couple that we could've had

I am literally scared with how I nailed their characterization in my rewrite, like, that's them, that's King Magnus (Magnifico) of Rosas and Amaya (Amable) of Rosas right there. The dramatic, power hungry dude that can barely control his temper + a cunning, calm and collected queen that thinks before acting but is just as vicious as him.

AND THEY CALL EACH OTHER SO MANY PET NAMES! SHE CALLED HIM "GOOD BOY"!!! HE PULLED HER FOR A ROMANTIC DANCE UGHHH DISNEY YOU TOOK THEM FROM MEEEE!!!

Now let's talk about... WHY this was scrapped, according to Mark Kennedy, the head of story in Wish, he says in the Behind the Scenes documentary that the reason they changed this, and I quote:

"We didn't want people to know Magnifico was evil right away, we wanted the people of Rosas to love Magnifico, and have only Asha realize he's not as good as he seems"

... Okay? That's not a reason to not make him SECRETLY evil, just have the rebels be like a group of people who are considered ungrateful weirdos by the people of Rosas, and the king spreads rumors that they're a threat, since they think NO ONE should get their wishes granted. So we have Asha being part of this rebellion, that doesn't fully know what Magnifico does with the wishes, but they know he's doing something bad, so it's up to Asha to find proof and open the eyes of the citizens of Rosas who love Magnifico, easy.

"Also it serve the story better to have Amaya be a good person"

Why? Because she distracted Magnifico and told them about the pulleys they needed to open the castle's ceiling? Just have one of Asha's MANY FRIENDS be a spy of the rebels that became close to the king and queen, maybe the king's apprentice, let's say Safi, and he tells them that info and also distracts them if needed, there, no need for good queen.

This one is the cheery on top, are you guys ready? I don't think you are, but here goes... "Additionally we couldn't really answer the question of why Magnifico wanted a star, and what it would do for him."

............................. I don't know if I can put into words how ENRAGED this make me feel, but I will try.

Mark, my guy, I'm sure you're a lovely person, but I know for a fact that you are lying. Because in a room full of professional screen writers THAT MADE IT TO DISNEY there's absolutely NO WAY no one stepped in and said "Oh but why does the villain want power though?"... THAT'S LIKE ASKING WHY JAFAR WANTED THE LAMP OR WHY URSULA WANTED THE TRIDENT!!!! HE'S A VILLAIN!!! VILLAINS ALWAYS WANT POWER!!!

"Oh buT MaGNiFicO Is DiFfERRenT bEcAuSE He'S A kINg sO He alREadY HaS pOWeR" SO WHAT??? Villains are never satisfied! Magnifico says it himself in the deleted scene

"I can't take it, this wanting that is never satisfied"

THERE! That's your villain motivation, he wants to fill a cup with no bottom, he wants more and more than he already has! Which makes him a PERFECT FOIL to Asha, because Asha wishes for more to her people, because they indeed are struggling, she wants what they need! And she'll fight for it, while Magnifico will only lie, cheat and steal his way into more power! GAAAAH IT WOULD BE SUCH A NEAT CONFLICT I'M GOING FERAL!

Anyway, on to the next one

Wishing Tree

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Deleted Sabino my beloved, you only get one scene in my rewrite, Tiana's father style, but I love you so much you sassy old man

I love this concept of the wishing tree so much, because this is actually a tradition here where I'm from, we take colorful ribbons, think of a wish, and tie them on a tree.

Would be lovely if Wish showed many types of different traditions of wishing besides just wishing stars, like blowing dandelions, throwing a coin down a well and soon.

But I digress, Asha has such an inspiring personality here, her writings show how she's fierce, longing for adventure

SHE HAS KNACK FOR SWEARING LMAO

She has an undying hope in her, and she wonders if it'll take Magnifico to DIE for her people to be free to wish, this is amazing, this is what I wrote my Asha into in Kingdom of Wishes

@uva124 joked the other day saying I might secretly be one of the disney writers just pretending to be a fan and sharing the original script, guys I swear that's not the case, they just communicated with me telepathically.

Jokes aside, this scene is so beautiful, Asha had everything to be an amazing protagonist.

Now for what Mark said in the documentary... Oh boy...

"The people of Asha's village keep their wishes a secret, and don't say them out loud, because if they do Magnifico will find their wishes"

Now THIS is very interesting, making Magnifico this almost omnipresent threat that even if you just SAY what you desire he might hear with his magic, maybe with a crystal ball or something Idk but regardless this is a great way to make him aware of who Asha is.

Cause think about it, Asha does make a wish, upon a star, so Magnifico would probably feel that wish, and thus he'd know Asha is the one who summoned a wishing star, so the chase would begin.

Heck, with this concept he could manipulate Asha into giving away star by promising that if she did so all her people would be free and he'd stop eating wishes all together because he wouldn't need more power anymore, obviously that'd be a lie, but it would make Asha have to choose between taking the easy way out and giving away her friend/love interest in exchange of her wish coming true, or risk it all and protecting him at all cost, ya know, a internal conflict.

"We wanted people to love Magnifico, and Asha to be the only one who finds out about his true evil nature, that way, when she tries to tell people, nobody believes her, and that's make fighting him much harder for her"

See Mark, that's a good idea, thing is, that's not what happened... Asha didn't try to tell people, and the times she did tell her family that Magnifico would never grant their wishes, they DID believe her, and Sabino got mad she wanted to tell him his wish. And when she told her friends, they didn't question her much about the fact she challenged the king, Dahlia just rolled with it like it was no big deal...

So yeah it would've been great if Asha tried to spread the truth but people didn't believe her, it really would, but that's not quite what we got

Star and Asha Chase Scene

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And there it is, the closest thing we'll ever get of Star Boy, and I love him

Star can take shape of any animal in this version, and that made him too similar to Maui and the genie, well, dear Disney, riddle me this, why didn't you just scrap the idea of him being a shapeshifter? There are many ways for a being to embody magic and creativity that don't involve them turning into animals, maybe have them be- oh I don't know- ANIMATED IN 2D???

"The ability to change into anything made star very powerful"

Here's an idea, make Magnifico MORE powerful than star, by making forbidden magic Star's weakness

"We wanted Asha to be our hero, and we wanted her to solve all her problems by herself, without too much help from star"

Bruh, Walt Disney said himself "You can design and create, and bild the most wonderful place in the world. But it takes people to make that dream a reality" Asha could NOT do this on her own, and that doesn't make her weak or less of a hero, it just means the threat was too big.

And if she was the one who had to make her wish come true, GREAT, just use Blue Fairy logic, she couldn't make Pinocchio a real boy right away, all she did was give him life so he could pursue that himself, same could happen to Asha, star gives her some magical intervention, but he can't do everything for her.

Also let me just say, that interaction between Asha and Star?

"Star we'll have to be very discreet" "Discreet? Got it, sounds like another plan, I'm getting pretty good at this planning stuff" "Uh you know what would help that plan? If you weren't so bright" "Oh-hoho thank you!- oh wait, you mean-" "Shinny, glowy, way too much light, turn it down"

I can SEE KOW!Asha and Aster having this exact same interaction!

And then that scene Star holds her hand under water! Bruh don't tell me they wouldn't be a thing Disney!

And all the sea creatures coming together to make a big spectacle, THAT felt like Disney magic, that WHALE!!!

That would've been so beautiful to see fully animated.

In The Dungeon

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Can't believe that I also wrote a scene of the 7 teens and Asha going to the dungeon before this scene came out, like, it's such an specific scenario

Anyway, so once again we see this better version of Asha, that is caring, smart and inspiring.

And Magnifico being a freaking DESPICABLE monster, saying that Dahlia is a burden that no one would miss because of her disability, like DANG that's something I never considered writing because it's so heavy, but they almost did include it, and I think it would've been great to show just how evil he is, and in turn, how amazing Asha is because of what she says next

"He underestimates you, and that's a good thing. When you're underestimated, they don't see your power coming until after it changed the world"

Thank you Wish deleted scenes, I'mma take this line and fit it in my rewrite somehow cause WOW imagine that, the 100th disney princess teaching something very valuable for children of today!

Think of all the disabled kids that would've felt seen in this scene! Instead Dahlia's disability is more of an after thought, and from what I've read, the way she walks doesn't even seem like she's disabled according to some crutch users.

"Also, Asha already had 7 friends, and we thought adding another one was too many"

I agree Mark, so here's a thought, make ONE OF THE 7 TEENS the apprentice that gets locked up in the dungeon, like Safi for example, and they find him by hearing him sneeze! There, suddenly the character whose only personality is sneezing get's something to do!

Magnifico breaking the wishes of people "No one would miss" is actually a thing in my rewrite, I didn't explore it that much cause it wasn't that important, but I'm glad I also got that right

Star was more useful in this clip than he was in the whole movie

Climax

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Not much to say about this one, hot take, but I'm actually glad this one was changed, sure I like Magnifico eating a bunch of the wishes to get more powerful, but personally I'm not a fan of him turning into a giant muscular monster, but I understand if you're into that.

Though, it's still a funny scene, it's silly yeah, but it's definitely entertaining, which is more than what I can say about the movie

Also Valentino is cute here

I like how Magnifico uses the wishes to shine a spotlight on Asha

This face, lmao

"THATS JUST A GOAT!"

The thing about this scene though is that... I can't imagine where they were going with this, like, then what? Magnifico climbs the tower to get star and Star manages to defeat him somehow? If so then yeah no wonder you deleted star for doing all the work for Asha, what's Asha supposed to do now that the king is all powerful???

Star saying "We just need one more ingredient" YALL MAKING A POTION??? This feels weird, a magical being making a potion... Wait hold up, I thought of this in this second, was the last ingredient Asha? Like she goes up there to warn them and it turns out she was what they needed to figure out how to defeat Magnifico?... Probably not but who we will never know.

Wish Worth Making

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This made me CRY when I first watched it, like WOW Disney, are you TRYING to make this movie as soulless as possible???

This is such a powerful moment that would make us actually CARE about Sabino, feel what Asha feels, and it's a calm and beautiful moment in this movie that never stops to just BREATHE.

Can you imagine Magnifico showing up after THIS?? It would've been so scary because it was the calm before the storm.

Imagine him breaking not only Sakina's wish but also Sabino's lute!

If I was Sabino's voice actor I'd be pissed to find out they deleted my song but kept the chicken dance song... That was a thing.

Anyway, hope yall had fun with this little rant, let me know YOUR thoughts on these scenes too! See ya next time!

Thank You For Reading!

#wish rewrite #kingdom of wishes #wish reimagined #wish movie #wish disney #wish star #wish 2023 #disney wish #disney #wish #wish deleted scenes #wish asha #queen amaya #wish king magnifico #Youtube

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arminsumi · 2 months

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♡ 𝐃𝐫𝐮𝐧𝐤 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬

𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬 : you and Suguru were too confused to realize that you liked each other back then, and now look at you two; short-lived romances litter your lives and drunk confessions dissolve the next day. It's all a mess. Add to that the fact that Suguru broke you and Satoru up behind the scenes; it's a drama written by the number one drama queens; Gojo Satoru and Geto Suguru.

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : fem reader / Geto Suguru / Gojo Satoru / college au

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : 🔞 Minors do not interact / 18+ / smut, plot, angst, miscommunication, mutual pining, breakups, Drama (with a capital D), alcohol/drunkenness, drunk s*x, unprotected sex, breeding kink, creampie, dirty talk

𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞 : i found a drunk!suguru confession post in my drafts and rolled with it 🙈

playing it off. playing it cool. he's suguru geto. everyone likes him and he likes pretending like he's oblivious to that, but it makes his ego swell.

you think; oh every girl in my friend group likes him so why should i bother? he's going to overlook me. he's overlooking me right now.

he thinks; oh she's not into me. she must think she's too pretty for me. if i try to lure her in will she think i'm showing off? fuck it i don't care i'm showing off to her.

you think; oh he's a show-off but he does it so well. why do i have to like the ones who don't like me back?

he thinks; oh is she playing blind? or did she not see me at all. what do i have to do? make her jealous?

you think; oh he's got a girlfriend now? of course he does. yeah, of course he does... i feel sick.

he thinks; why is she looking at me so bitterly? am i fucking things up? maybe she used to like me back then.

you think; if he's dating someone, then i'm dating someone, too. i can't be alone and without him. this was manageable when he was single, not now.

*****

suguru geto comes up to you in the corridor with a confrontational tone of voice;

"why the fuck are you sleeping with my best friend?"

and he thinks you have some audacity to just shrug in response. he presses, but you avoid answering until he locks in on you in the corner of a classroom now, moving out of the corridor for some privacy. yes, much needed privacy.

"i'm gonna ask you again, nicely—"

"it's not really your business. i mean, i don't pry into your life, do i?"

your reply slaps him across the face and he just stays silent, then storms off.

*****

gojo satoru broke up with you a week after dating. figures. he was a playboy after all, and you knew it, so why are you crying?

"really, get it together. there is more to life than this nonsense. come on, get yourself out there again. buy yourself an expensive red dress. get your nails and hair and makeup done. and go strutting like the world is yours."

"... thanks mom." you reply in a sarcastic gurgle, eyes crusty from crying.

shoko is rubbing your feet, you're watching a soapie together because she claims it makes her feel better after dreadfully long shifts at the hospital.

"you know, i warned you about satoru, didn't i?"

"... yes, you did." you hang your head.

"why'd you chase after satoru then?" shoko asked seriously.

"dick."

"... be serious."

"... i really like suguru."

"oh. well. the plot thickens." shoko looks at the tv, then at you. "trying to go the roundabout way to meet him?"

"yeah. he's got a girl now, you know."

"... are you sure?" shoko looks at you suspiciously, "it sounds like you haven't stalked his socials in a hot minute..."

"what, why?" you perk your ears up like a bunny.

"uh, 'cause like... his "girl" just deleted all the pictures of him and her together and he did the same. sooo..."

*****

you do buy yourself a good, wine-red dress and although you selected it purely because you daydreamed of suguru geto romantically lifting it off of you, that never happened that night because everything went wrong and ended in a drunk mess.

avoiding satoru was not easy when you looked so good and he was so horny and lonely, so you let him heatedly mark you up with his lips in the bathroom and put his hands all over you. the way he squeezed and massaged your body made you think for a split second that he really did like you. and the way he kissed you? he kissed you like a romantic — yeah, horny. of course horny. but a romantic over that.

"... why do you look so good tonight..." he said, as if it was unfair.

"uh-huh." you reply. "that's thirty minutes up, playboy."

"daaamn i'm not a playboy, stop calling me that." satoru groaned, and like a sexy playboy.

"you sound like one every time you open your mouth."

"then silence me." he replied with a wink.

"... i'm going to go find shoko."

he made a whiny noise.

"but—"

"—no, satoru."

"okay."

satoru looked like he was holding back a lot, but you couldn't understand what he was holding back. did he just want sex? was that it? no, not with that look in his eyes. he didn't look at you like a wolf, he looked at you like the breakup was a robbery for him, and you were stolen.

stolen by who? who knows. i don't know. do you know? hm. maybe you can guess.

*****

i hate drinking, suguru thinks as he stumbles around the party bleary-eyed and swaying, leaning, into any wall that could care to hug him right now.

i hate it here, too.

he looks disgustedly at everyone, then goes into the quiet backyard where there's no life but the crickets in the grass.

why can't she like me as much as i like her?

he's mean and drunk. he's hurt.

that's why when the two of you encounter each other, an argument froths up.

"damn what's your problem tonight?" you asked after he made some passive aggressive comment.

"you."

"me? the fuck did i do?" you look at him.

"you ruined my life..." he slurs romantically.

"... what?"

he kisses you so softly. you tense up, far too confused to enjoy it even though his kiss is something you've wanted for a while now.

when he pulls back and sees your facial expression, he feels guilty.

did they lie? it seems like i'm not as good of a kisser as they said.

"... i love you." he says against your face.

"you're drunk."

"no, i'm in love." he says drunkenly.

"let's get you sober..."

"i mean it!"

"then say it when you're sober. i think you think you love me right now, but tomorrow you won't make eye contact with me. in fact, i know you'll pretend this never happened."

he sniffles, starting to cry.

"shit, don't cry. i don't know what to do if you cry."

"... just hold me... i'm cold." he says.

it's summer, but i'm cold and lonely and in need a warm touch.

you hold him.

for a while, he just stays there with his head on your upper chest. his nose gets stuffy as he keeps crying. unable to tell whether it's the alcohol or you that's making him cry right now.

"can i come home with you?" he asks.

and he asks it in such a soft, pathetic voice that you can't say no.

"alright. but no funny business..."

"yeah, of course."

i'm too drunk and sad, even if you'd want that i couldn't.

so you take the train home with him at 2 AM. the train handles sway overhead. there's a lot of empty seats. the lighting is stark. you're cuddled together like awkward lovers after an argument. suguru almost falls asleep from your body warmth.

*****

you herd a drunk suguru into your bedroom and turn the lights on.

"lay down." you tell him. "i'll get you water."

"i love you."

"okay." you reply flippantly, but his words struck you and they'd settle in your mind for days to come.

"just 'okay'?" he lifts his head sadly from the pillow.

"i don't know what to do with your "i love you". it's just too much right now. you've given me mixed signals for months and now you hit me with this?" you shake your head at him.

he pouts to himself, still incredibly drunk. all he can really hear and feel and need is you.

"... cuddles?" he asks.

"okay..."

so you lay with him and he's so overjoyed he blatantly smiles about it, soaking up your warmth and the softness of the bed. your bed. he's in your bed, cuddling you, just like he knew he would one day. even if it's under a strange circumstance. even if everything was confusing and messed up, in your bed everything made sense.

but you're laying there wondering, is he going to pretend this never happened once he's sober tomorrow? is he going to pretend the two of you didn't lay together, talking about your lives in hushed voices, sharing childhood memories with laughter — is all of this going to dissolve the next day just like the alcohol dissolves from him?

you don't know.

suguru's needy squeezing and soft breathing in your ear make you feel loved, even if it's just drunken love. and somewhere in the cave of his mind, he's hoping that by the morning his courage won't have evaporated and he won't become a coward and damn just love you.

"kiss me." he mumbles against your cheek.

"what, right now?"

"of course right now."

you don't know where his sudden need to kiss came from, but you sympathize with the drunkard — they need a kiss to warm up and feel alright. but you also shake, just a little, because this is what you want, too.

one kiss doesn't satisfy him, he gets greedy. and greedier after each kiss, until his tongue is slithering into your mouth and he's leaning on you with his weight, pressing a boner into your lower half.

"suguru... don't. you're gonna regret it in the morning, probably."

"... how could i regret you?"

the shift in his voice told you that some of the alcohol had worn off, albeit not too much.

his fingertips press into your skin and it sends him to heaven. you're sighing under his touch, trying to practice self-restraint, because this drama keeps getting more dramatic and you didn't want to contribute to it more by fucking with the best friend of the guy you dated — er, whom you dated to get back at said guy for dating someone else.

suguru kisses your neck tenderly, and that's when you snap and give in completely.

"... i want you."

"then have me."

******

a shuddery moan escapes suguru when he slides inside you. he spreads your legs a little wider, snuggling his waist between them like he's found his home.

"kinda romantic, aren't you?" you tease. "i could practically see your pupils dilating there."

he hums at the sensation of your wet walls gripping him.

"yeah, romantic — i'm sure you noticed that about satoru, too, huh?"

"someone's jealous..."

he bottoms out in you so slowly that it's easier to take. he's not unbearably big, not unbearably thick, just perfectly filling you.

"... of course i'm jealous, why'd you think i told him to break up with you."

"huh?"

you don't have time to question this crazy revelation because he's driving into you back and forth hard all of a sudden, knocking you into a near-orgasm with how perfectly he angles into your g-spot.

"fuck, baby!" he whines into your shoulder, "you feel so good!"

"s-suguru..."

"yeah, say my name." he commands breathlessly, "say it over and over until i cum."

he sounds nearly pathetic, like he hasn't pleasured his cock in forever. he's nearly drooling. just going crazy for you but at the same time trying to maintain his cool "i'm geto suguru" — which slips completely when he cums prematurely.

"i love you, oh my god i love you so fucking much, will you have my baby?"

"y—y–yeah! i'll — fuck! — i'll have your baby, suguru!" you reply.

"oh, good girl." he moans, "get pregnant for me."

he's so whipped by your reply that even though his cock is overstimulated and sensitive from cumming, he still drives into you until you reach your orgasm. he even snuggles his fingers into your clit and rubs it frantically, practically forcing your orgasm to arrive. he just loves to see it wrack your body and make you curl in.

"fuck... you're so beautiful." he says as he watches you cum all over his cock.

"s—suguru!" you pant, totally incoherent for a few seconds because of how strong your orgasm came over you.

he's slowly sliding his softening cock in and out, until he slides it out your stretched-out hole and you can hear him slide out — practically hear how thick his cum is as it dribbles out of you.

"creampies are pretty romantic, huh?" he jokes, smirking down at you as you pant.

"... you're crazy."

"i'm crazy for you."

"... me too."

he cuddles you for the rest of the night as if that's all he ever needed to hear. and what consequences would come for fucking you when he knew satoru genuinely likes you?

I do not permit the copying/reposting/translation/plagiarism of my works. Do not steal what I've worked hard to create.

This is fictional work.

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ziggyyyystardust · 5 months

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I’m sorry but I hate the way people completely disregard the fact that Luke is a Jedi, like he’s literally the og Jedi?? I’ve seen a lot of people talk about how much “better” his new Jedi order would’ve been because he would’ve removed the attachment rules or whatever, and I think that that type of characterisation really disregards the essence of Luke’s character and what he stood for. People seem to cite him bringing his father back from the dark and being close with Leia but that doesn’t mean he’s attached to them in the way Jedi view attachment, he cared about his father because Luke is a caring person and wanted to help him, acting as if it’s only because Vaders his dad really disregards a lot of the character development Luke went through from a new hope till return of the Jedi.

Also it seems really odd to ignore it as he 1: shows a genuine want to become a Jedi and all that being a Jedi involves 2: (mainly rotj) cares what Yoda and Obi-Wan have to say and the advice they give him 3: says word for word “I am a Jedi” sure he may not have the training of a Jedi but it’s pretty clear that he really does care.

On a similar note - I’ve seen people talk about it but people also tend to disregard the fact that Luke was part of the rebellion?? It’s treated like “oh silly sunshine boy just wants to fly ships he doesn’t know what politics are🥰🥰” it completely infantilises his entire character, his beliefs and what he cares about. We see in ANH that he has interest in the rebellion, knows of the clone wars and vaguely of the Jedi, and in the deleted scene with Biggs they both talk about defecting to the rebellion and fighting against the empire. These scenes clearly show his political beliefs and how he was against the empire even before they killed his Aunt and Uncle. It does him a disservice to ignore who he is as a person and to treat him as if he’s just a child who likes ships, it removes any sense of agency or conviction when he’s treated that way

Point is I wish more people would treat him like a mature adult who is capable of making his own choices and is an actual Jedi who follows the code.

#rant post #luke skywalker #pro jedi #the rebellion #the empire #master yoda #obi wan kenobi #pro jedi order #Jedi Luke Skywalker #return of the jedi #please just write him like a mature adult that’s all I ask

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just-jordie-things · 3 months

Text

shades of cool - zen'in naoya

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ 10k follower event special! ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

word count: 16.5k warnings: swearing. a semi-soft naoya fic bcuz i'm a f r e a k. summary: naoya doesn't need to love you when the fate of your arranged marriage had been written when you were only kids. and of course, he'd never actually fall for you. more info: arranged marriage!au enemies (sorta) to friends (sorta) to lovers, obviously he's out of character a/n: i am so sick in the head for writing this. adding him to this even was such a... choice. don't request stuff for him i will delete the ask in shame <3 ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

[ but i can’t fix him, can’t make him better. and i can’t do nothing about his strange weather. cause you are unfixable. i can’t break through your world. cause you live in shades of cool. your heart is unbreakable ]

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

SUMMER, 1995

He’s six years old when Naoya first meets (y/l/n) (y/n). She’s freshly six and she looks it, too. Chubby cheeks colored pink from her obvious shyness. She’s standing behind her father’s legs, reaching for his hand even though he’s repeatedly dodged her hold or swatted her hand away.

Naoya’s spying on the scene in the entryway of the Zen’in estate, peeking through the second floor railing with a curious sort of glare on his face. He’d heard whispers among the staff of a visitor from one of the more powerful clans, and while normally Naoya couldn’t care less about the many people coming in and out of the compound, when he’d heard his own name mentioned one too many times in correlation with this visitor, intrigue got the best of him.

And surely she was the reason why. She was no older than him, dressed in a silk kimono that had to have been tailored just for her, and her hair swept back into a jeweled butterfly clip that sat at the back of her head. Although half of her hair was falling out of it, seeing as the hand that wasn’t desperately reaching for her father’s was tugging at the uncomfortable claw secured against her scalp, trying to relieve the tension of her hair being pulled so tightly. Naoya could almost scoff at how childish she looked.

He’s only been spying for a few minutes before his father is turning around and staring straight at him, the marble railings doing nothing to hide his crouching stature. His stomach drops with fear, expecting to be scolded and punished for eavesdropping, even though he hadn’t heard a thing the adults were saying. Instead, the head of the Zen’in clan beckons his son to descend the stairs and meet their visitor.

And although he wants to, he doesn’t hesitate. He’s upright and quickly making his way down to courteously introduce himself to their guests.

“Naoya, this is the head of the (y/l/n) Clan, you remember him, yes?” Naobito gestured to the man still swatting away at his daughter’s hand, prompting Naoya to tilt forward in a respectful bow.

“Yes, sir”

“It just so happens his daughter is your age,” Naobito continues, directing his gaze to where she stood.

She was just a small thing, so tiny Naoya could hardly believe she was even six years old. She was merely a pipsqueak, and her demeanor seemed so, too. Her eyes could barely meet his, opting instead to stare at his shoes. If his father weren’t standing there, he would’ve scoffed and walked away without so much as a second glance.

“It would be nice if you two could… get along,” Even Naobito seemed uncertain of this union. His son’s apprehension was clear in his rigid stance and bored expression, and the young (y/l/n) didn’t seem like she could hold her own. If that were the case, she didn’t stand a chance with his ruthless son. “Why don’t you show her around the compound while the adults chat, hm? Be a proper host”

Naoya looks up at his father, silently asking if this was the best use of his time. Naobito’s expression was unmoving, and unforgiving. There was no getting out of this, then.

“Fine” Naoya huffs, and he regrets the attitude when his father’s hand smacks up the back of his head. He doesn’t say anything else as he nods for the girl to follow him.

Once more she reaches for her father, only to be gently pushed towards Naoya, and against her will, she follows behind him.

She’s silent as he boredly walks her through each room, pointing here and there at cursed tools he wanted to show off, or expensive art he couldn’t care less about. A few times, Naoya even had to check over his shoulder that she was even still with him. She was like a mouse. If it weren’t for her buzzing cursed energy, he could forget she was there at all.

Every time he checks on her and her eyes meet his, his brows furrow. He couldn’t explain it, since she hadn’t actually said a word to him yet, but something about her irked him. He was certain there wasn’t a chance in hell they were going to be friends.

“What’s your deal anyways?”

His question is abrupt, and full of cruelty. He halts suddenly right before he’s about to show her the lame gardens that the staff tends to. The girl merely blinks, seemingly unphased by his blatant rudeness. At this point, he’s wondering if she’s a mute, or maybe just too stupid to—

“My deal?” She repeats, speaking for the first time.

Her voice isn’t as timid as he would have expected. It’s soft, but there’s an underlying boldness there, as though she were just waiting for her chance to tear into him. It flips a switch in him to put his guard up, the prickle on his skin reminding him of his older brothers’ torment. Perhaps she was just like them, playing the long game, stringing him along into thinking she was just another pipsqueak, when in reality she was about to pin him down and tie him up like a hog. Or at least, that’s what his brothers would have done.

“I dunno,” She hums, shrugging her shoulders with her lame answer. Naoya’s lip curls into an irritated snarl. He certainly wasn’t expecting that. “My dad said I had to come”

That’s all the more she tells him, and young Naoya scoffs. He’d only been around her for all of ten minutes and he was already over it.

“Whatever,” He mutters, pushing through the doors and not bothering to hold it open for her as she continues to follow him outdoors. “Just try to keep up, pipsqueak. Let’s get this over with”

And that’s exactly how he feels the next few times her father brings her along on his visits to the compound. Impatient, hurried, and most of all, irritated. Whatever the point was for having her here was lost on Naoya. She didn’t appear all that interested either, so why torture the both of them?

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

SPRING, 1997

They’re eight when Naoya finally comes to realize why the Zen’in and (y/l/n) Clans insist on the two of them spending so much time together. The idea makes his stomach churn and his throat fill with bile.

“You know this is all just an act, right?”

His words are sharp, as they always are, while (y/n’s) busy picking the weeds out of the grass around them. She insisted on gathering all the dandelions, no matter how much he criticized her for fawning over the dumb weed. After a few years of regular drop offs, where her father would smoke cigars with Zen’in Naobito and have adult conversation, she was stuck entertaining the young Zen’in.

Naoya wasn’t the most pleasant of company, when he did speak he never had anything nice to say, and when he wasn’t talking, he had a resting scowl on his face. Lucky for her, her patience seemed to know no bounds. Or perhaps she’d just gotten used to his shitty attitude.

(y/n) had grown up mastering the craft of being patient. Of smothering emotion from her face, especially ones such as disgust, or fear. Coming from a long line of sorcerers who had mastered the Reversed Cursed Technique, she was in line to be yet another higher grade sorcerer with the (y/l/n) name. Unfortunately, it had meant her training began young, and it was a gruesome lesson plan. She met many sorcerers who came to her estate after unruly battles and exorcisms, covered in laceration wounds or missing appendages. Any sign of weakness or apprehension had been taught out of her years before now. If she was too afraid to go near an injured sorcerer, there wasn’t a chance of her learning how to heal them. So it didn’t matter if it was a stranger or her own family crying out in agony as they tried to stop the heavy bleeding from a nasty injury, her first lesson was learning to keep a neutral face in the presence of gore.

This lesson came in handy during her visits with Naoya, as well.

“If you’re acting, you’re not all that good at it,” She replies. Her own choice of words are witty for an eight year old, snarky, even. But her voice is as soft as ever. “Or, are you trying to look like an ass all the time?”

When she looks up at him, her gap toothed smile is so large it takes up most of her face. She knows she’d gotten him good when he’s scowling and letting out an annoyed sound from the back of his throat. Truth be told, she didn’t have a clue as to what he was referring to, but the only way to keep herself amused during these little forced sessions was by picking dandelions and dishing his attitude back at him.

“You’ll never get a husband with that mouth,” Naoya bites back. “No self respecting man would ever want the hand of a girl that talks back”

She raises a brow at him, although her eyes are focused on the stems of a few yellow weeds in her hands as she diligently loops and knots them together. Her interest is far more captivated by the dying weed than the obnoxious brat keeping her company. Still, she pays him some attention, just for times’ sake.

“I don’t think I have to worry much about that,” She says with a small giggle, still knotting her pile of dandelions together. Naoya’s disinterested stare is focused on her handiwork as she calmly responds. He realizes distantly that she’s making a crown out of the damn things. He looks away then, thinking he was far too focused on her waste of time than he should be. “Don’t you think we’re a little young to have to think about marriage?” She asks.

Naoya sneers, his know-it-all attitude rearing it’s head as soon as it gets the chance.

“You don’t pay attention to anything, do you, pipsqueak?” He scoffs. (y/n) fights the urge to roll her eyes as she continues on with her crown. “You’re going to marry me”

Naoya’s filled with a sick sense of pride for an eight year old, revealing the big secret that their father’s had yet to share. He thinks he’s got her speechless now, and surely she’ll be shocked, maybe even cry. Naoya thinks he’d like to see her sniffle and whine over this news.

He’d certainly gagged when he’d heard the whispered rumors among the staff for the last few days. Anytime he’d heard their names brought up his nose would wrinkle, and he’d ball his hands into fists as he marched away from the ridiculous gossip.

But it’s silent for a few beats, and she appears as though she hasn’t even heard his announcement. His heartless grin begins to falter as he watches her admire her little ring of dandelions, lifting it to get a good look at it in the sun. A small smile stretches across her lips as she deems it finished, before setting it on her head.

“Were you listening?” His grin falls to a deep frown rather quickly.

(y/n) doesn’t let even a flicker of emotion cross her face as she finally turns to look at him. His dark eyes are wide with anticipation, and she knows he’s waiting for a dramatic reaction out of her. She’s not sure why, she’s never really been one for the theatrics, that was always him. Naoya was the one that wanted to march around, show off, and be relentlessly and pointlessly cruel. She was the one who sat and bore it without a word or any reaction at all, really. In the handful of times she’s been around him now, she had yet to understand his obnoxious personality.

“Yeah” She answers, simply, and without the notion of having anything more to say.

Naoya’s brows furrow harshly as he glares at her. He thinks he’ll never be able to understand this girl, much less get along with her. If she really was set to be his wife, he’d have to find every way he could to wiggle out of it.

“It’s an arranged marriage,” He spits out matter-of-factly. “Don’t you understand what that means?”

(y/n) nods her head, the loose crown of dandelions slipping around her ears.

“When we’re older, we’ll get married,” She replies. “It’s not that hard to figure out”

“You knew?” Naoya scoffs.

This time, she shakes her head.

“No, I didn’t,” She tells him, calm as ever. “But does it matter?

He blinks, his eyes wide and full of their usual nasty emotion, mixed with something else she’s never seen on him before. He almost looks lost.

“Don’t tell me you actually want that?” He asks, his voice lowering to a near whisper.

They were the only people in the gardens, always left alone to play and get to know each other, and they always sat there in mostly silence until it was time for her to go. Still, Naoya couldn’t bring himself to speak at a volume any higher than that. He couldn’t risk anyone possibly hearing his accusation.

To his displeasure, (y/n) shrugs. Shrugs. As if being arranged to marry him made no difference to her. As if she barely had any opinion of it at all. Sure, she might not have had a say, but she could think for herself, couldn’t she?

“I don’t really know anyone else,” She tells him, lifting the flower crown off her head to adjust some of the loose stems. “My parents insist on homeschooling me, so I don’t have friends. I’d rather marry someone I know than a stranger”

For the briefest of seconds, Naoya almost softens. He almost feels pity for her. He almost wishes things were different so neither one of them had to be in this position. But just as quickly as the thought crosses his mind, he’s bristling and snarling again.

“You can barely even manifest your cursed technique,” He scoffs. “You know that makes you weak, right?” His words are harsh, but judging from the lack of response from (y/n), he could almost believe she tuned him out completely. “What makes you think I would want a weak pipsqueak like you as my wife?”

Finally, she cracks, but not in the way he was hoping. Her eyes don’t water, she doesn’t sniffle, or even frown. She simply places the dandelion loop back on her head, and gives him a tiny, yet victorious smile.

“What makes you think you’ll have any choice in the matter?”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

That question sat with Naoya for longer than he would’ve liked. Months pass, and each time he’s forced to see her again, his stomach is filled with the unfamiliar sensation of anxiety. He hates it. Hates the chill that crawls up his spine every time he has to greet her at the door and they have to go sit in the garden for hours on end.

He doesn’t enjoy talking to her, in fact, he despises it. He hates the way every time she speaks her voice is soft, and full of whimsy. Even as she tells him she still hasn’t mastered her Reversed Curse Technique, she sounds hopeful. Too hopeful. By the time they’re ten years old, she’s still struggling to get the hang of it.

Naoya spends most of his time ignoring her, or reminding her of her weakness. (y/n) spends most of her time picking the dandelions as she wanders the gardens, and not ignoring him nearly as much as she should.

She simply couldn’t help it. She’d meant it when she’d told him he was the closest thing to a friend she’d had, after all. The exception being her tutors and a few cousins that would entertain her when they visited. But they had an obligation to be kind to her, the only daughter of the head of the (y/l/n) Clan. Naoya, despite being her betrothed, held no obligation to her at all, and he certainly acted like it.

She had yet to figure him out, but as months turned into years, she was slowly getting a grasp on it. He was more deeply insecure than he would ever admit, and as soon as someone stumbled upon those insecurities, they were scrutinized, blown to bits by his harsh words.

Naoya wasn’t one to give any piece of himself to anyone. No matter how often she’d try to know him better, in order to care for him better, (y/n) made little to no progress. She was lucky if he spent the day with his mouth shut. She’s not sure he’s ever said a kind thing in his life, and after a few years, she’d given up completely on hoping he’d try.

Still, she didn’t put up a fight when she was brought to the Zen’in compound. She smiled and bowed and followed the dark haired boy out to the garden where he’d sit and yank up the grass while she searched for dandelions, or maybe a ladybug. If she were to be his wife, there would be plenty of time to get to know him later. Maybe as he grew older he’d soften around the edges, and he’d be easier to be around.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

SUMMER, 2000

When they’re eleven, (y/n) announces that she’d been accepted into a private school.

She’s grinning from ear to ear, practically glowing with excitement as she goes on to tell Naoya all about the new classes she’ll get to take, but most of all, all the friends she’d get to meet. She talks to him more that day than she’d ever had before.

He sits in annoyance as he’s stuck listening to her talk about her uniform of all things. But he doesn’t have it in him to tell her to shut up. Maybe because for once, he could be deluded into thinking she’s enjoying her time with him today. Even though naturally, she’s only in a good mood because of the coming school year.

“Kind of dumb to go to a school with non-sorcerers, isn’t it?” Is all he has to say when she’s finally finished rambling about all the great things about her new school.

“You think?” She muses, intrigued by his opinion for reasons that were beyond him.

“It is if you spend all your time gossiping and learning stupid non-sorcerer things,” Naoya says decidedly. “You should be focused on your technique, pipsqueak. Not friends”

(y/n) hums thoughtfully in response. She knows he’s only jealous, seeing as he didn’t have any friends. Of course she couldn’t say anything of the sorts to him, he’d probably beat her up for it. Instead, she gifts him with her patience.

“I think I can have friends and still work on my technique” She says decidedly.

Naoya scowls, as she predicted, but she doesn’t react to it, simply goes back to threading today’s dandelion crown together. He doesn’t have anything else to say, even with plenty of bitter thoughts forming in his mind. He keeps his mouth shut and counts down the minutes until her father collects her and takes her home.

Today when she leaves, she drops the dandelion crown in his hands with a smile as she says goodbye. Naoya grimaces at the ugly clump of dying weeds, and once she’s gone, drops it into the trash before going on with his day, not giving it a second thought.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

WINTER, 2003

The first time she gets a grasp on her Reversed Cursed Technique, they’re fourteen.

And despite the unforgiving coldness of the February afternoon, (y/n) insists that they still sit in the garden for the duration of her visit. Naoya tries to tell her that she’s stupid for wanting to spend their time out there where she was going to catch a cold, but when she doesn’t budge, he decides to let her suffer the consequences.

She was a quiet little pipsqueak, but she was stubborn as hell, and for some reason that afternoon, Naoya hadn’t been in the mood to bicker. It probably had something to do with his brothers taunting him all throughout breakfast. They’d learned that messing with him about his little girlfriend as they called her was the quickest way to get his temper to snap, much to their delight. It only meant that by the time she’d arrived, he’d already been broken down and was too mentally drained to put up a fight over something as silly as the cold.

“I’ve learned how to apply my Reversed Cursed Technique on myself” Is the first thing she tells him once they’re alone, sitting in a patch of dry, dead grass surrounded by banks of snow.

“About time” Naoya replies gruffly. She’s not surprised that he has nothing nice to say, she hadn’t expected anything different.

So instead she rolls up her sleeve, tucking it at her shoulder to reveal her entire bare arm. The little hairs stick up and her skin prickles with goosebumps in the frigid air, but she gives no other indication of being bothered by the cold.

When she displays the long, bumpy scar that extends from the dip in her shoulder, down her bicep, nearly all the way through her palm, Naoya can’t help but widen his eyes at the nasty scar. It’s puffy and pink, clearly still healing. He’s silent as he follows the raised skin from start to finish, before turning to look at her, trying to gauge what she was thinking based on the mostly neutral expression she wore.

She was an impossible person to read, it was one of her most annoying qualities. Naoya always believed himself to be gifted in reading others’ thoughts just by looking at their body language. Never once had he been able to penetrate (y/n’s) thoughts. Every time she spoke she found some way to catch him off guard. Even after these last few years, it would still induce a chill of anxiety to shiver down his spine.

“Learned one way or another,” She chuckles, before pulling her sleeve back down. “The scar should fade soon. I got to it a bit late” She explains.

Naoya’s brows fall into a furrow and his lips curl into a puzzled frown.

“You did that to yourself?” He asks, disgust laced in his tone at the cruel attempt at training. Sure, his clan would likely applaud her for it, but the ends didn’t exactly justify the means to him.

“No,” (y/n) scoffs quietly. “Slipped up during training and had a nasty scratch. Had I not moved when I did, I might’ve lost the whole arm”

His mouth opens, but no words come out. He doesn’t know what to say, his brain is running haywire with the possibilities. He wants to call her foolish for acquiring such a scar just from training. He wants to drag her by her clean arm to where her father is mindlessly chatting away with his and demand he use his own Reversed Cursed technique to fix it. She was his only daughter, wasn’t she? Couldn’t he have healed her up just fine?

He doesn’t fully believe her story, not with the way she’s talking about her training thus far, but he doesn’t call her out on it, either.

When he snaps his mouth shut again his jaw clenches, and his teeth grind together as he squashes every thought that crosses his mind.

“Well, it’s nasty,” He mutters, sounding uncharacteristically helpless. “But at least you can use your technique now”

(y/n) beams. That was as close to a compliment as she’s ever received from him.

“Hurt like hell, but worth it!” She declares, and the pride in her voice makes him sick. “I can’t wait to show the kids at school. They’ll think it’s cool. They’ve probably never seen stuff like this”

He gives a small nod in response. He couldn’t exactly argue with that. Non-sorcerers were bound to think of her as some sort of badass over such a scar. It would probably boost her popularity among the insects of her school. Naoya frowns to himself.

“You shouldn’t show people that,” He tells her, without much of a reason in his mind. She looks at him curiously, wrapping her arms around herself while still refusing to claim she was cold. There’s not an ounce of truth in his words as he talks out of his ass. “They’ll probably just pity you. They’ll probably think you did it for attention”

She hums, nodding back at him in understanding.

“You’re right,” She tells him, much to his surprise. “I wouldn’t want that”

When she leaves that day, he wonders if she actually took his advice. He wonders if the scar will be gone the next time he sees her.

It’s the first time he’s ever thought about her next visit.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

SPRING 2005

When they’re sixteen, Naoya notices a change in her.

Not just a physical one brought on by puberty and elegant growth into young adulthood. It wasn’t just her sharper jaw and thicker lashes, or the way her eyes had a way of piercing through his in an unsettling way. It wasn’t just her longer legs or the strength carried in her abdomen and arms. It was a mindset change, he was sure of it.

She was more confident in the way she carried herself. No longer did she try to reach for her father’s hand, barely casting him a second glance as they parted ways at the Zen’in compound’s entryway. She respectfully bowed her head, but that was it. She didn’t mess with the clip in her hair anymore, or avoid eye contact by staring at the ground. She was a little more poised, and a little more sure of herself.

And now when she was with Naoya, he could practically feel the change in her just from the way she looked at him. Inquisitive, with a small smirk on her face like she knew something he didn’t, and despite his better judgment, he was just dying to know what it was.

He had yet to decide if this change was a good one or not. She was more vocal than usual, witty in their bickering as she yet again forced him to spend their time in the garden. Her voice was still soft but her words were sharper than usual, more decisive. He thinks that having a wife so mouthy and bossy would be an inconvenience to him and his clan, but he’s not sure if voicing that now would be of service to him. He couldn’t go offending her father, not yet anyways, so he keeps his mouth shut and takes her out to her precious garden.

“I have some exciting news to tell you,” She says as soon as they’re alone outside.

Her gaze is fixed on a clump of hyacinths, which irks Naoya. No one else dared speak to him without looking at him, it was a respect thing. The staff, even his younger cousins and some older ones, they all held eye contact when speaking to him. She makes no effort to show him respect, but her manner isn’t intended to be cruel. This was the playful side of her personality that he was starting to despise. He grinds his teeth.

“I’ve been asked to the spring formal at my school”

She sounds delighted, and it’s clear in the way her eyes light up and her smile curls just right to show off pearly white teeth. She tells him this news like he’d been dying to know, like he’d cared at all. He scoffs, rolls his eyes as he leans back in the grass on his hands, careful not to catch his sleeves on the dirty ground.

“I’ve never heard of something more stupid”

“It’s a big deal,” (y/n) turns to him, her hands moving as she explains the details of the dance, how important a pretty dress is, how the most popular couple attending would be crowned spring prince and princess, all of which fell on disinterested ears as Naoya frowned and fought the urge to roll his eyes at everything she told him. “It’s sort of silly, but it’s not stupid,” She tells him with certainty. “Especially not since the most popular guy in my grade asked me,” She adds with a grin, leaning forward a bit to catch his attention. Surely he’d care about that little piece of information.

Naoya rolls his head against his shoulder as he gives her a bored stare. She’s still beaming, bright eyes flickering between his golden brown ones that fought so hard to keep their dull glare.

“Of course, he doesn’t know I’m technically betrothed” She adds, the word slipping off her tongue with syrupy, sticky sweetness. That had a reaction flashing across his face, miniscule changes in his twitching brow and narrowing eyes.

They never really talked about their arrangement. Not since bickering about it as kids, anyways. Naoya always assumed it was because neither one of them were all that fond of the idea of an arranged marriage, especially to one another, seeing as they got along about as well as oil and water. But here she was, bringing it up like it was nothing, like it carried no real weight. And she was teasing him about it.

It made something in his chest snap. Something sharp, something that had never been touched before.

“What, you’re asking for permission to go on a lame date to a lame school dance, with a lame non-sorcerer?” He scoffs at her, but his cruel words do nothing to hinder the excitement in her face.

“Permission? Of course not,” She shakes her head. Her eyes land on a stray dandelion not far from her reach, and she leans over to pluck it from the grass without hesitation. Old habits die hard. “You’re not my husband, I don’t recall signing any papers”

He scoffs again, his lips curling into a sarcastic grin. She knows he’s going to spit out some vile nonsense, but she can’t help but brighten further upon seeing his smile. It was a rare sight, after all.

“Not yet,” He corrects her. “But I’m sure if I were to tell my father about how unfaithful you’ve been acting, you’d be pulled out of that non-sorcerer school by the end of the day. And what then, pipsqueak?” He challenges.

She straightens her posture as she takes his challenge and runs with it. The old feelings of anxiety stir in his chest as she tilts her chin upwards . It was like she knew exactly what it took to get under his skin. When did she get so defiant?

“Immediately running to Daddy is so outdated, don’t you think?” Her voice drops an octave, and her smirk is widening just a bit as she watches it sink into his mind. “Besides, unfaithful feels a little strong” She adds with a short breath of a laugh.

“Not if you’re practically engaged” He snaps back quickly.

(y/n’s) the one to roll her eyes this time. He wants to hate it, instinct clawing up his throat and wanting him to tell her just how terrible of a wife she’d really make, that obedience was the first rule in marriage. But the words die there, swallowed down thickly and leaving his throat dry and scratchy. An aching throat could be the only explanation as to why he wouldn’t say a thing.

“Doesn’t there have to be a ring for that?” She snorts before chuckling to herself, a sound he’s never heard from her before, and doesn’t know what to do with now. He blinks, fire burning in his eyes the longer she puts up this stupid game. What was her ploy, anyways? “Or, you know, a proposal?” She fires back before he could even say anything.

Naoya clicks his tongue in irritation, turning his gaze in the opposite direction so she couldn’t see the way he fought to come up with something.

“I don’t care if you go to your stupid formal with some nobody,” He tells her in a mutter, still focusing his attention elsewhere, anything to keep from looking at her just yet. “Under the condition you’re not actually unfaithful, of course. No point in having you as a wife, then”

(y/n’s) eyes are fixed on him even though he won’t turn back to her. She can just barely make out the pink tips of his ears under the mop of dark hair that covers them. A tiny smile cracks at the corners of her lips as she hums to herself.

He turns to her then, his brows furrowed as always, his lips pressed into a thin line as always, and her small smile breaks into a wider grin.

And then, she’s laughing. His expression changes to one of confusion as bubble after bubble of laughter escapes her. The more she laughs, the harder it hits, until she’s nearly cackling with it. Even if he bothered to ask her what was so funny, she surely wouldn’t have been able to give him a proper answer. So he watches in his shocked state of confusion as she throws herself back on the grass, hands over her stomach as she laughs loudly.

“Hey!” He barks then, head whipping around to be sure no one could see this childish display. “Are you trying to stain your kimono?” He scolds her.

For some reason, she laughs harder. Naoya thinks he sees a tear slip down the side of her cheek as it continues with no end in sight. The expensive white silk she wore would likely have green stains all over the back now. Naoya winced, knowing he’d be the one to be scolded by both of their fathers for letting her so recklessly ruin the material.

Her feet are kicking against the soft grass as peels of obsessive laughter flies out of her. It goes on so long, Naoya lets out a humorless laugh himself, just barely smiling at the whole display.

He didn’t get the joke, not in the slightest, but as she opens her eyes and wipes away her tears while she looks up at him in her giggly state, he laughs just a little more, with just the slightest hint of genuine humor.

It takes a few minutes for (y/n) to completely calm down, her chest rising and falling as she took unsteady breaths to relax. Her eyes fall shut again as she lays in the sun and waits for her breathing to even out. She never does tell him what had cracked her up, but he doesn’t ask. He simply works to keep his expression neutral and uninterested while she basks in the sunny afternoon, still laying in the grass without a care in the world. She almost looks comfortable here, like she could be happy here.

And when she leaves, she drops the singular dandelion she’d plucked into his hand. She can tell by the look on his face that he has no intention of keeping it, and she doesn’t really care either way. But she smiles as the tips of her fingers graze over his palm while she hums a goodbye, and just like that, her and her father leave the compound.

Naoya hesitates before tossing it into the trash bin, giving the yellow weed a once over, just to see if he could see in it what she did. Defeated when he can’t find anything special, he tosses it.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

SUMMER, 2006

Being on the cusp of eighteen, Naoya’s certain that their time before a proper wedding was waning. Surely once they were both of age, there would be pressure from both clans for him to make his proposal, something dramatic and with as many eyes watching as possible. The idea makes him sick to his stomach, so he’s been trying not to think about it, but again, time was running out.

Her visits are growing more infrequent. It’s nearing the end of the month, and she’s only been around twice in that time. He’s not sure what to make of that, undecided on if her father is proving the point that he’d need to make his move soon, or maybe…

“You seem to be thinking a lot today,”

Her voice is soft, but it still manages to draw Naoya out of his busy head. He turns to look at her, giving her every ounce of his attention. There’s a small knot between her pinched brows, and he’s not sure he’s ever seen her look concerned for him before. It makes his chest do something strange.

Is that a stutter in his heartbeat? He worries about the implication. A stroke?

“Can’t be good for you” (y/n) finishes with a teasing little smirk on her face.

He scoffs, barely rolls his eyes, and the corner of his mouth betrays him as it tilts upward in her direction.

“Like you’d understand. You don’t have clan politics to worry about” He mutters, his eyes squinting as he turns to face forward again, the sun catching his line of sight harshly.

As always, they’re sat in the gardens. (y/n) had already collected her small pile of dandelions, and was diligently knotting them together to make her crown. She’d gotten better at it over the years, thickening the stems with extra of the weed to make it appear more full. Naoya sat with nothing better to do than be lost in his own thoughts, and occasionally watch her as she worked on her mindless craft.

“I don’t care to worry about clan politics the way you do,” She corrects him, casting him a glance for a mere second before going back to her stems. “And besides, the politics you worry about are prehistoric,” She adds with a scoff. “Medieval” She adds bitterly.

Naoya rolls his eyes in good nature.

“Like your clan is any different” He mumbles.

Her elbow knocks into his, and he turns to glare at her for the mock attack, but she’s smiling, and while the sun seems to make him wince, it does wonders to compliment her facial features.

And thinking that she looks beautiful isn’t necessarily a new thought… it’s not like he’s ever found her unattractive. She was always… pretty… in her quiet sort of way. But Naoya’s not yet used to thinking about her beauty every time he looks at her, and he hasn’t learned yet what it takes to squash those thoughts.

So for now he tries to pay it little to no mind. Rest assured, he will find a way to not think about it.

“No, they’re just the same, I’m afraid,” (y/n) hums, tilting her head slightly as she regards him. “But between you and me, I think I can escape it”

Naoya barks out a laugh. He doesn’t believe her.

“You don’t escape family,” He states bitterly. “You’re stuck with them whether you like it or not”

“You think?” She asks, arching an eyebrow at him. Ever so interested in what he thought, even when she thought he was wrong.

Naoya merely nods. He knew all too well that you were stuck in the life you were born into. Even if it meant under-achieving older brothers that didn’t deserve to be the head of the Clan, or the Hei. Even if it meant being forced into a marriage with a young woman who deserved much, much better than this life.

But he can’t say any of that. So he nods, and turns to face forward again.

“Well, I don’t think so,” She shrugs one of her shoulders. “I think we get some say in who we want in our lives,”

Says the girl forced to come sit here with me three times a month for the last ten years, Naoya thinks bitterly, but again, he keeps it to himself.

“Not that it’s easy, but,” She shrugs again. “I like to think so, anyways”

“What’s your grand escape plan, then, pipsqueak?” He asks, admittedly amused by her antics this afternoon. Which is odd, seeing as normally he’d find it childish, and ignore her.

Pink lips curl into a precious smile as she looks back at him.

“Love, of course”

He almost laughs, right in her face, which would have broken her seemingly fragile heart, but when she gives him her answer and he realizes it’s not a joke, he almost can’t stop himself. Almost. Naoya sinks his teeth into the inside of his cheek and clears his throat.

“Love?” He repeats and it comes out of his mouth like he’s never even heard of the concept. (y/n) chuckles as she nods back at him.

“Yeah, love,” She confirms. “You remember that guy that took me to spring formal?”

For fucks’ sake, she has to be joking. Naoya rolls his eyes as he drags a hand down his face in disbelief.

Despite his clear lack of interest, she goes on.

“Well we’ve hung out a few times now and it’s been… nice. He likes me and I think I could like him, so,” For a third time, she shrugs, like it was the easiest plan in the world. “I think if we fell in love, my father would have to let me off the hook a bit, wouldn’t he?”

No, no he wouldn’t, Naoya knows for a fact that when it comes to arranged marriages, there was no exception to the arrangement. Unless someone died, there wasn’t a chance of getting out of it. It didn’t matter if she bore this non-sorcerer’s children, this time next year, she would belong to him. On paper, at least.

“Your father is far more reasonable than mine,” Naoya sighs. For some reason, he can’t bring himself to tell her the whole truth. He continues to entertain her foolish ideas. “Have you talked to him about this yet?”

“Of course not!” Her voice squeaks as she gasps at the idea. Naoya can’t help but laugh a little bit at her bashful reaction.

“Does he know about this non-sorcerer-nobody at all?” He presses, and (y/n) chews on her bottom lip as she shakes her head. Naoya gives her a bored look, silently telling her that she was doomed already.

“Well what was I supposed to say?” She mumbles. “I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea”

“I told you not to go down the unfaithful route, pipsqueak,” Naoya sighs. “Now you’ll have to fess up to all of it”

“It’s not like I’ve done anything wrong,” She explains. “Yet…” She adds in a smaller voice.

“Thinkin’ about adultery is just as bad as the real thing,” Naoya chuckles. “At least in the elders’ eyes”

(y/n) narrows her eyes at him in mock irritation.

“We’re not married” She reminds him in a mutter. He only smirks back at her. He doesn’t have to say anything for her to know what he’s thinking.

Yet.

“Semantics,” He smirks.

She laughs despite herself. He seems relaxed today, and after so many years she finally feels like she’s getting the smallest of glimpses into the real him. She’s always wondered what Zen’in Naoya was really like, and she can’t help but feel eager to finally learn.

“Well, what’s the damage?” He huffs, acting as though he’s not dying to know the specifics of this little relationship she’s found herself in. “You didn’t sleep with him, did you?”

“What!? No!” She yelps at the accusation, and this time smacks the back of her hand against his arm.

“You abuse me, wife” He grumbles as he pretends to rub the spot to ease the nonexistent ache.

“We’ve just hung out a few times. Sometimes he helps me study, sometimes he brings me the drink I like from the cafe—”

“That stuff doesn’t matter” Naoya rolls his eyes. What silly little things she found interesting in a man. Women could be so simple.

“Sure it does,” (y/n) furrows his brows. “Quality time is-”

He could care less about the details, so he interrupts her.

“But you’ve kissed him, yeah?”

The question shuts her up immediately. She doesn’t try to deflect, or come up with a witty reply to snap back at him. She shuts her mouth and stares at her lap. At first he’s amused by the shy display, but as time passes, it begins to click for him that she’s embarrassed.

“You’re acting foolish, pipsqueak,” He barks out a laugh, throwing his head back as he does. Her face feels like it’s getting hotter by the second. She covers her cheeks with her hands to relieve the burn. “Your plan relies on childish love and you haven’t even kissed the guy? Who in their right mind will take you seriously?”

“It’s not childish,” She argues, her voice quiet, and her face still covered by her hands. “I just— there hasn’t been the right moment. S-something always came up,”

She grows quieter with every word, her humiliation washing over her like a wave of dread. Perhaps Naoya was the wrong person to come to with this.

“Like you’ve kissed people—” She tries to bicker with him, but there’s a glint in his eye as her words catch his interest, and something about the way he smirks and tilts his head makes her second guess herself as she shuts her mouth.

“Oh, don’t tell me,” He’s snickering before he can even finish his words. (y/n) wishes she could open up the ground and let it swallow her whole. “You’ve never kissed anyone, pipsqueak?”

“Would you stop calling me that?” She sighs, but it’s no use. He’s got his paws on a juicy piece of embarrassing information. His brutal nature was about to come out in full force.

“And here I was worried about a second-hand wife” He scoffs.

“Hey—!”

“So why are you hitching your whole plan onto a guy you don’t like, hm? Shouldn’t you go out with a bang?” He smirks and leans back on his elbows. “Or at least a kiss-”

“Excuse me? I do too like him” She cuts him off before his cockiness could get overbearing.

“If you liked him, you would’ve kissed him already,” Naoya rolls his eyes. “I think you need a different plan of action”

“Well I— I mean I would kiss him,” She stammered over her words. “There just hasn’t been a good time—”

“Haven’t you known him for like a year?” Naoya sneers. “Bit of a prude, hm?”

(y/n) drops her hands from her face to gape at him, smacking his arm once more.

“I am not!” She whines, followed by a quiet, “You don’t think he thinks that, do you?”

He huffs.

“I am not going to sit here and gossip about this bullshit with-”

“Naoya, now you have to help me” She interrupts him, moving forward and latching her hands together in a pleading motion.

His eyes widen and his brows furrow. He’s not sure how he landed on this timeline, but this? Since when was she so open and personal with him? What was this treatment? Was it some sort of punishment? Did he do something in a past life to warrant this?

“I don’t have to do sh—”

“Please?” (y/n) bats her eyelashes, and he’s starting to think she might be a witch. “Just some advice, that’s all,” She tells him. “Since you’ve clearly kissed so many people”

He rolls his eyes, before sitting up off his arms. That’s not exactly what he’d said. But he smirks to himself. There wasn’t any harm in letting her believe that, was there?

“Whatever. You don’t need advice. You just need to pluck up some courage”

She frowns at him.

“I have courage,” She states. “It’s not about courage”

“Oh yeah?” He chuckles to himself. “Then why exactly haven’t you made a move?”

(y/n) frowns, dropping her gaze to go back to working on her dandelion crown.

“Well I thought he’d make the first move. And then he never really did and… now I’m sorta… relying on it, I guess,” She sighs and drops the dandelion loop back into her lap. “Shit. He doesn’t even like me, does he?”

Naoya laughs, a real laugh, with a real smile flashing across his face. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind that some non-sorcerer-nobody wasn’t completely enamored in a girl like her.

“No,” He disagrees, the word firm, certain. “Sounds like you’ve just picked a coward. Can’t say I’m surprised, pipsqueak, I don’t know why you’d go for a non-sorcerer-”

“This part’s not helpful”

“—but, you’ll probably just have to make the first move. It’s not hard. You’ll be fine”

She frowns at him, and it takes an effort for him to not roll his eyes back at her. She couldn’t be serious.

“Just kiss him, (y/n). Don’t be stupid. It’s unbecoming of you. But you are seventeen, and it’s a little embarrassing of you, too”

Her frown turns into a look of offense, and he can’t help but laugh a bit again.

“Don’t laugh at me. And don’t call me embarrassing! You’re the one that told me I couldn’t be unfaithful”

“Yeah yeah,” He waves his hand dismissively. “If you’re so worried about it, then kiss me”

She freezes, her expression going blank while her eyes wildly flicker over his features, trying and failing for the thousandth time to try and figure him out.

He’d suggested so casually, like it was the most obvious solution, like it wouldn’t mean a thing.

Naoya raises his brows and purses his lips, waiting expectantly for her to decide what she was going to do.

“I— you can’t be—?”

“What difference does it make?” He asks, shaking his head nonchalantly. “Either you learn how to be a good kisser and you get your boring happily ever after with your non-sorcerer-nobody, or you end up married to me and you’ll only be kissing me for the rest of our lives anyways”

When he puts it like that, the hair on the back of her neck stands up. She’d always known in the back of her mind that at the end of the day, it was her and Naoya. Whether they were friends or partners didn’t matter, and arranged marriage only went one way. Most of the marriages in the more powerful clans weren’t exactly in loving relationships anyways, it was a mere power grab. A way to unite clans, or to brush dirty politics under the rug.

For over ten years she’d been brought to the Zen’in compound to play nice with Naobito’s youngest son. In all that time she struggled to figure out what that actually meant, how to actually treat him with kindness when all he knew was a sharp tongue and a cold shoulder. Over time she’d learned to sit back and let herself be entertained by him. If she couldn’t grow to like him, or worse love him, then she might as well find some amusement in his company.

But now he’s sitting beside her with the offer of a kiss, and not just any kiss, her first kiss, and he’s telling her that it’s for her greater plan of getting out of their arranged marriage? She can’t help but think he’s been using her for his own amusement all this time, as well. He must have had an ulterior motive.

“What’s in it for you?” Her eyes narrow inquisitively.

He scoffs at the question.

“A kiss is a kiss,” He shrugs. “But I’ll take it back if you’d rather—”

“No!” She’s louder than she means to be, and she jumps forward a little closer than she should, closing a significant amount of space between them. “I mean- no, you’re right, then you can tell me if I’m any good at it”

He pointedly eyes the small amount of space between them before tilting his head at her, a sly sort of smile on his face as he nods.

“Alright then, pipsqueak,” He hums, beckoning her forward with his hand. “Do your worst”

Her brows pinch together for a moment, before her eyes shift down to his lips with apprehension.

While she’s distracted by her uncertainty, Naoya keeps his focus on her. And for once, he lets himself really look at her. Her eyes are round with her nerves, just a little wider than usual, almost doe-like. Her pupils are dilating, and he could almost hear her thoughts just from watching her expression shift and change with each passing one. His gaze lowers when she tucks her bottom lip between her teeth, growing more unsure the longer she thinks about it.

Naoya figures she must be having girlish thoughts. She was probably worried about losing her first kiss over what was essentially a dare, and would be meaningless. She was probably worrying herself sick knowing that after this, he would forever be her first kiss, whether she liked it or not. He could almost scoff at the notion.

The plush of her lip gives under her teeth as she slides it back and forth anxiously. Naoya watches the action religiously, lost in thought about how pink her lips are, and how he’d never really given them much thought. Despite her worried gnawing, they look soft, plump, even. He thinks just from looking at them that she’s bound to be a good kisser with lips like those. If his own mind weren’t going so haywire with having her so close, maybe he’d make the choice for her and kiss her first.

But he’s too occupied. Her perfume is wafting up his nose with the lightest scent of something flowery and sugary. He’s breathing a little deeper to take more of it in, addicted to the feminine scent after just a few whiffs, but he’s doing it so slowly so that she won’t notice that he’s about to suffocate himself.

“Naoya,” She says his name and it comes out like a scold. He arches a brow when he drags his eyes back up to hers. She pouts at him. “You have to close your eyes, you can’t stare at me like that”

Her cheeks are pink, he notes the rosy blush that’s dusted across her nose, and the longer he watches, he swears he sees the color darkening. Was she really that flustered just from a little staring?

“Like what?” He finds himself asking without really thinking. A nervous laugh escapes her as she sets her gaze on anything but his prying eyes. The golden brown hue were piercing right through her it seemed, building up her nervous anxiety.

“Just— just close your eyes” She stutters out.

Naoya rolls his eyes, but eventually follows the instruction, letting them fall shut.

“I don’t like being told what to do, pipsqueak,” He says, and with his eyes closed, she finds the confidence to reach forward, fingertips barely skimming over his chin, and then along his sharp jaw. She doesn’t miss the way his throat bobs when he swallowed thickly. “And hurry it up, I’m getting bored-”

“I don’t like being told what to do either,” She quips, but her voice is barely above a whisper, soft breaths fanning over his lips. “I just— give me a damn second”

She knows if his eyes were open, he’d be rolling them. Jackass.

He can feel her fingers trembling against his skin, resulting in the lightest of tapping against his jaw. His lips curl upwards against his will.

“Princess, breathe,” He mumbles, blindly reaching up for her hand, wrapping her fingers with his own. “It’s just a kiss, what is it that you’re stressing this hard over?”

“Well w-what if this all doesn’t work out and th-then—”

“I said breathe,” He commands, and despite the instruction being in her best interest, his tone is sharp. She obeys it immediately, shutting her mouth and breathing in deeply through her nose, before slowly letting it out. He waits until she’s no longer shaking before speaking again. “D’you want me to do it?”

Her eyes snap up to his, although he’s kept them closed all this time. She can’t believe he hasn’t cheated on her rule.

“No, I… I can do it” She mumbles with certainty, before tilting forward in the smallest movement.

The tip of her nose touches his for a moment, before brushing past as she gets closer. Her fingers press a little more firmly against his jaw, making sure he won’t move when she finally does it.

Her heart is beating so hard in her chest she knows he can hear it, if not feel it as she shuffles closer to him. She can’t believe he hasn’t teased her for it. Maybe he’s just waiting, so once she kisses him and this is all over, he can torment her and hang it over her head for the rest of their lives.

But just as the bitter thought crosses her mind, her eyes flicker down to where his hand is still loosely wrapped around one of hers, keeping her touch present against his jaw, and keeping them still. It’s not a firm hold, but gentle, so loose she knows if she were to pull away he’d drop it instantly. And then she can’t help but feel that maybe Zen’in Naoya has a soft spot for her. Maybe there’s a side of him that’s quiet, and slow, and gentle, and maybe she can let go of her silly anxiety to indulge herself in that side of him.

She counts down from three in her head. Then closes her eyes. And leans the rest of the way forward.

As for Naoya, he can’t say he’s ever really thought about his first kiss. He wasn’t one to care about the milestone of it, or really any of the specifics. If it had crossed his mind in the past, it was only with the intention of wanting to kiss a worthy girl. A pretty girl. Beyond that, fireworks or romance wasn’t even in the question. It didn’t really matter.

But (y/n’s) lips are even softer than they looked. They’re timid, unmoving when they first touch his. He’s surprised she even followed through with it, he was completely prepared for her to chicken out and beg him to forget the whole thing. Next thing he knows she’s kissing him and he kisses her back as soon as he realizes she’s not shyly backing away after two seconds. She follows his lead slowly, her fingers pushing along his jawline until they reach the soft locks of hair that just barely hangs past his ears.

He wasn’t prepared for this.

It wasn’t fireworks, and it wasn’t some grand romantic gesture either.

It was… peaceful. Like sinking into a warm bath after a long day of training.

It was warm, and comfortable. Like the first day of spring once the snow had all melted away and the flowers were getting ready to bloom once more.

A kiss is a kiss, he’d told her, like a damn fool.

Naoya’s hands began to wander, dropping hers to cup them gently around her warm cheeks, making sure to touch her as softly as possible, so as not to startle her. She surprises him again when she leans carefully into his palm, lips still too enamored with his to pull away.

This was not just a kiss.

She lets out a soft sigh when they finally do part, lips still brushing his and her eyes still shut as she catches her breath quickly and quietly.

He’s frozen then, right through his bones. His hands are still on her face, his eyes are unblinking when she finally opens her own, shyly meeting his gaze. He thinks he must look like a fucking imbecile right about now, staring at her silently while she’s clearly waiting for his approval of her kissing ability.

But he can’t say a damn thing. He can’t move an inch. She’s rendered him weaker than he’s ever felt before.

The pad of her thumb mindlessly strokes a gentle shape at the junction where his jaw meets his neck, and his heart is stuttering again, just like earlier.

Except now he knows it’s not a medical condition.

It was beating like that for her.

“Well?” She murmurs, soft and hopeful as her eyes flicker in between his. “What’d you think?”

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

WINTER, 2008

Their eighteenth years came and went, and with it, the notion of an arranged marriage.

Naoya stood before his father, his hands currently curled into tight fists that were sure to leave crescent shapes in his palms with how harshly he dug his nails into the skin. His jaw was locked as he ground his teeth together to keep himself from blurting out something he’d regret, but his frustration was made abundantly evident.

It was more than frustration. He was livid.

“What the hell do you mean she’s not mine to marry?” He’d all but snarled at the head of the Zen’in Clan.

Naobito sat back in his chair, still focused on whatever paperwork was in front of him, as disinterested in the affairs of his son as ever.

Even now, while Naoya’s entire perception of the rest of his life was falling apart at the seams, the older man barely lifts his head when speaking.

“She never has been, son. Where is this sudden urgency to marry coming from?”

“Sudden urg-? What are you talking about?” Naoya throws his hands out, exasperated from this conversation going in circles. “Her father’s been dropping her off here with me for years in order for us to get to know each other. You’ve been arranging this marriage from behind the scenes since we were six”

Finally, Naobito raises his head just long enough to give his son a confused shake back and forth.

“You’re looking for things that aren’t there. Our intention was never to arrange for young (y/n) to marry you, Naoya,” He’s calm, despite his son’s rage being too large for the room. “What is this about?” He asks, dropping his pen as he regards his youngest son with a raised chin. “Am I to believe you’ve grown to care for her?”

“That doesn’t matter,” Naoya snaps with a scoff in his throat. “What matters is she was supposed to be my wife, she was meant to be my bride since we were kids, that— that was always-!”

“Her father never had an interest in you as a suitor,” Naobito lets out a scoff of his own, an amused smirk on his face. Naoya shuts his mouth, pressing his lips into a thin line as his anger starts to simmer. “You were too harsh, son. Too… sharp around the edges for his only daughter. Look at it from his perspective, hm? Head of his clan, only one heir and it’s his precious little girl. Would you be pulling strings to set her up with you?” Naobito scoffs again, this time followed by an amused chuckle. “Our clans only recently started mending things after our… history…” He trails off thoughtfully. “(y/l/n) (y/f/n) was never going to give away his only daughter to you, much less any of your brothers, or anyone who bore the Zen’in name”

Naoya’s chest is rising and falling so roughly, he wonders if this could be the brink of a panic attack. All his life he thought he’d be stuck with her. The last thirteen years, he’d thought that at the end of it all, she’d be the one by his side. And for a long time he resented her for it, hated her for it. And then, for some reason, without explanation, something changed. In the way she looked at him, in the way he felt about himself when he was around her, he couldn’t quite put a finger on when it happened.

But when she was seventeen and needed to get her first kiss out of the way, he was the one she went to.

And when she was fourteen and had just mastered her Reversed Cursed Technique, he was who she told proudly, even with the gruesome story.

And when they were eight, and he’d oh-so stupidly told her that they were being set up for an arranged betrothal, she’d told him she would marry him.

Yet here he stands at nineteen, having naively entered his father’s study with the intent of arranging the details of the proposal— the dowry, the location, the letter he’d have to write to (y/n’s) father— and for the first time in his life, he’s being told no.

“I don’t know what led you to believe you were to be her suitor, son”

“We both thought that was the arrangement,” He muttered. “Since we were kids, (y/n) and I thought-”

“She’s going to Tokyo this weekend, Naoya,” Naobito huffs, pinching his fingers through his mustache to relieve his stress from this pesky situation. “Her father is bringing her to meet with a young man around your age. He does intend on marrying her off, but he was waiting until it was appropriate”

Naoya’s hands are clenched into fists again. He couldn’t believe this.

“This isn’t— I won’t have this” He mutters.

That perks Naobito’s interest.

“Son, we can find suitors of other clans to-”

“I don’t need to be set up with weak, worthless, women!” He shouts over this father, possibly for the first time since he was a misbehaving child. “I already had a— there was already supposed to be—!”

He can’t find the words, or maybe just the strength to say them. But with a huff he’s spinning on his heel and marching back out of the study. He’d said his piece, and there was nothing more the head of the clan could do for the situation. It was out of their hands.

Naobito watches in silence as his son leaves, the heavy oak door slamming shut behind him. He hadn’t seen an outburst like that from his youngest son in years. He didn’t understand the nature of it all, because it wasn’t like Naoya to be infatuated with a person, much less a young woman with a cursed technique that parallels his in strength, but he didn’t know what else could have gotten him so worked up over the whole thing.

There wasn’t a chance Naoya truly had grown to love her, was there?

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

2009

For her twenty-first birthday, (y/n) was gifted a grand party. The guest list was extensive, the catering was expensive, and no cost was spared for the whole ordeal. The grand courtyard of the (y/l/n) estate was the perfect place to throw such an elegant party, complete with fountains, twinkling lights, and of course, live music. An expensive part for an expensive family. It was typical.

Naoya didn’t come to these sorts of events often. The idea of walking around and sucking up to whichever elitist family was hosting just seemed so… dull. The parties themselves were often the same thing over and over, appetizers, mingling with people that only wanted to show off, drinking, and then going home and feeling like shit.

And truthfully, he wasn’t going to go to this one. Even though he hadn’t seen (y/n) in over a year, and even once his father made it clear that while the Zen’ins had been invited, he was specifically requested to attend, from the birthday girl herself, he’d said.

So now here he was, with a permanent scowl on his face and a very expensive suit that he would never wear again. He doesn’t look like he wants to be here, because he doesn’t, and yet anyone who saw him that night would have said that he was on a mission to find someone. Whoever it was must have been important, seeing as he didn’t pause to talk to anyone.

But he figures she’d invited him specifically. She requested his attendance. The least he could do was wish her a happy birthday, right?

There’s a lot more he wants to say to her. A year and a half’s worth of messy thoughts that barely made sense to him but every bone in his body told him to find her and lay it all out. Even if he had to drag her away from her own party, and hold her by her shoulders to keep her in place so she’d listen.

Naoya didn’t chase people down. Ever.

So when fifteen minutes after his arrival he finally finds her, with The Honored One himself, he considers turning around and leaving without the intention of ever speaking to her again.

But it had to be Gojo Satoru of all people. Powerful, filthy fucking rich, charming, devilishly handsome, Special Grade, Gojo Fucking Satoru. It couldn’t have been any other eligible bachelor from a well of clan, it couldn’t have been some nobody for him to turn his nose up at and walk away from with a boost to the ego.

He stews for too long in his bitter thoughts, and from across the crowd of people, she sees him. It’s too late for him to turn around and leave unnoticed. She’s already picking up the skirt of her dress so her feet don’t trip over it as she quickly makes her way over to him.

He could still leave, he thinks distantly. But as she gets closer he can see that she’s smiling, she’s actually glad that he’s here, and once again he’s frozen while he’s reeling from the shock.

He still tries to maintain his scowl, he can’t have people getting the wrong idea once she’s close enough he can hear her delighted laughter and ramblings of “You came! You got my invite? It’s been so long!”.

And he hates it, he hates seeing her, especially when she’s so relieved to see him, especially when she looks so radiant, in her pretty party dress that’s draped so perfectly on her it must’ve been tailored, and with her hair falling around her shoulders and down her back so perfectly she didn’t even look real she looked fucking angelic—

“Naoya?”

His name falling from her lips has him blinking himself back to reality, his nasty expression falling momentarily as he takes her in and realizes she really is standing here right in front of him.

“You alright?” (y/n) asks, once it seems he’s conscious again. Her grin had morphed into a worried little smile. Shit, he can’t tear his eyes away from her lips.

“I’m fine,” He declares, void of any real emotion. “Happy birthday, by the way”

Her smile brightens a bit more then, and her eyes gleam too.

“Thank you,” She replies sheepishly. “I’m really glad you came, I wasn’t sure if you’d accept the invite”

“Yeah, it’s not really my thing” Naoya clicks his tongue as his eyes wander the courtyard, taking in the estate properly for the first time. Anything to distract himself from her.

“I know,” She sighs softly, her head tilting as she regards him, her cheeks inevitably warming up the longer she stares. “You changed your hair”

He looks back at her, still making the effort to keep his expression neutral, and she can tell, but she doesn’t comment on it.

“Yeah. While ago” He replies dryly.

It wasn’t long after he’d last seen her that he’d taken to a change in style. She just so happened to stop coming around with her father around that time.

“I like it,” She says quietly, a bit awkwardly.

At times it feels like she’s forgotten how to speak to him, not that he was ever the easiest person to get along with. Yet, in their time apart, she found herself missing him. Thinking about him. Wondering what he was up to, or if he ever thought about her.

“Oh, I know,” Her eyes light up with an idea, before she beckons him to follow her. “I should show you the gardens!”

Just like that, she’s leading him away from the party, away from the prying eyes of Gojo Satoru, who seems to watch the scandalous pair with a smirk on his face. Naoya scowls back at him, but ultimately focuses on following (y/n) around the courtyard, and then behind her estate.

“You do recall that you were the one that cared about the damn flowers, right?” He asks her once they’re far enough away that the voices of her partygoers were drowned out by the muffled music.

“And you don’t like being around crowds of people,” She reminds him, glancing over her shoulder with a proud grin on her face. He rolls his eyes at her. “I’m doing us both a favor!” She declares.

He’s not so convinced, but he doesn’t put up a fight. He simply tucks his hands in his pockets and bears it as they wander around the yard in the dark.

He tries to keep his damn mouth shut, he really does. But it doesn’t take long before he’s blurting out the thought on the front of his mind.

“So Daddy picked a Gojo for you, hm?”

As soon as it comes out, he regrets it. Because (y/n) isn’t shy in the way she pauses on her journey so that she can turn to face him with that curious look of hers. He’s never been interrogated by her, but he suspects it wouldn’t go well.

“I wouldn’t say that,” She muses, her words carefully picked out. “Not a Gojo anyways… more like, The Gojo, don’t you think?”

The smirk on her face tells him that he’s bearing witness to the witty side of her personality, the side that likes to poke and get reactions out of him that she knows she can. Naoya rolls his eyes again, and to his luck, (y/n) goes back to leading him out to the gardens.

“So full of it” He grumbles.

She giggles, having heard it.

“My father took me to Tokyo last year so we could meet. Mostly, I think he wanted to meet Satoru, he was a bit shell shocked. But we got along well. He’s… fun” Again, she’s careful with her words, and Naoya can tell. He grimaces, his hands forming fists in his pockets.

“So you hit it off then, hm?” He presses further, despite his gut feeling twisted enough. “Whatever happened to your non-sorcerer-nobody?”

“Oh,” It dawned on her that it really had been a while since they last spoke. “You were right,” She glances over her shoulder at him once more, her expression unreadable as she says, “I didn’t like him,” And then she’s facing forward again and finally reaching the gardens of the estate. “At least, not like I thought I did,” She clarifies. “Kinda hard to explain, I guess. He was a good guy and all just…” She shrugs her shoulders, and she couldn’t come up with anything else to say so she didn’t say anything at all.

Naoya nods, his brow furrowing as he glances over the large expanse of flowers and bushes, all trimmed and perfectly on display, even in the dark. A garden at night was probably one of the worst places to be. Not only was he stuck wandering around outside, but he couldn’t even see the damn things.

“To be honest, once I’d gone to my father to tell him about, well, having feelings for a non-sorcerer, I’d gone on my big speech about how I wasn’t ready to be married off, how I wasn’t ready to be a wife and how I wanted to travel and take on assignments exoricizing curses and— and trying to find the right field for my technique… anyways, I was pretty surprised when he told me I wasn’t arranged to married off at all,”

She’s looking at him, he can feel her soft yet piercing gaze staring right at him, but Naoya can’t bring himself to look away from whatever blue flowers were before him now.

“We had a great talk, though. He told me he wouldn’t marry me off if I wasn’t ready, and even then only if it were in my best interest and with my approval… not that this matters,” She mumbles the last part, realizing she was rambling on with nonsense. “I mean it’s what I wanted… but I guess I’m still sort of surprised that’s how it worked out”

(y/n) wraps her arms around herself, although it’s not a chilly night, she’s lured into the defensive stance as she drops her gaze from him.

He merely hums, barely nodding his head to agree. Saying he was surprised to find out they were never truly arranged to be married would have been an extreme understatement.

“Anyways…” The air is thick with an uncomfortable tension, and (y/n) nervously coughs to clear her throat. “How have you been doing?”

“Fine”

Naoya’s answer is quick, and sharp. (y/n) winces at the bite in the singular word, and her nerves begin to grow into irritation, but she tries to remain as calm and collected as always.

“Has your father been giving you more responsibilities for—”

“What the hell does it matter to you?”

She can’t keep her expression soft at the rude question. Her nose crinkles and her brows furrow as she narrows her eyes back at him.

“Excuse me?”

Her attitude comes out in less than a second and suddenly she’s crossing her arms and Naoya doesn’t think he’s ever seen her look this upset. There’s a twinge of guilt in his chest knowing he caused it with his coldness, but it passes as he’s quickly reminded of the reality they found themselves in.

“It doesn’t matter to you,” He scoffs, a humorless smile curling on his lips. “So what do you care?”

“What the hell is that supposed to—?”

He interrupts her before she could finish her question.

“What’s the point of even inviting me here, huh? Is this some sick ploy? You want to show off for once?”

Her eyes widened at the accusation out of left field. She doesn’t have a clue what he’s going on about, but it’s making her blood boil. It seemed that even when it came to him, her patience could wear thin. And his time was long overdue.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” She mutters at him, wrapping her arms a little tighter around herself. “I invited you because I wanted you to come,” She explained. “And I thought maybe even though this wasn’t your scene, you’d want to come, too”

Naoya rolls his eyes.

“Oh, spare me, pipsqueak,” The old nickname rolls off his tongue with nothing short of disgust, and he can see the way she recoils upon hearing it said in such a way. “You invited me, I came. We’re done now, yeah? You can run back to Satoru now”

Oh, he hadn’t missed the way she’d oh so affectionately called the world’s strongest sorcerer by his first fucking name.

(y/n) scowls back at him, which was something unfamiliar to the both of them. She was always the calm one, the collected, soft spoken one. Now she looked seconds away from smacking him across the face.

“What the hell is wrong with you tonight?” Her eyes are wide as they study his expression, trying to figure out what was going on in his head, seeing as he definitely wasn’t going to just be honest with her. “I mean, fuck, is it really so hard for you to believe I wanted you here?”

Naoya scoffs again, leaning back and facing away from her as he covers the upset expression on his face. This only makes her more upset, and the harsh laugh that escapes her throat is anything but humored.

“You’ve got to be kidding! After all this time, you can’t just say it can you? You can’t be real with me for even a minute?” She moves forward, trying to grab him by the arms to turn him to face her, but he doesn’t budge, and shrugs her off.

He couldn’t have her looking at him right now. Not when he was losing the battle of masking all of his emotions.

She huffs in defeat and throws her arms down when she fails to get him to look at her already. Against her will, her anger turns into something worse as tears begin to prick the corners of her eyes.

“You know, I was actually upset when my father said he wasn’t going to take me to see you anymore,” She spits at him, but the tiny waiver in her voice betrays her. She swallowed thickly to try to relieve the burn in her throat, but it was no use. He’d already heard the crack in her voice, and finally, he’s just barely turning his head to peek down at her. “Because I— I might not have known what I wanted, but I spent m-my whole, life, thinking that it’d always be y-you n’ me in the end”

His irritation is washed away as soon as he sees those doe eyes filled with tears. When he was younger, and more of a bratty asshole than a regular asshole, he would’ve loved to make her tick like this. He would’ve felt pride knowing he’d reduced her to childish tears.

Right now, he thinks he could throw up.

Suddenly too much of his attention is on her for her liking, and when he pulls his hands out of his pockets to reach for her, she smacks both of his hands away as harshly as she could bring herself to do.

“(y/n)—” He tried to scold her but she wasn’t having it, already gathering the skirt of her dress to storm off and leave him there.

“Forget it. You’re right. We’re nothing to each other now, right?” She laughs bitterly as she leaves as fast as she can in the stupid heels she’d decided to wear.

“I didn’t— (y/n)!” He breaks into a slight jog to catch up with her, darting in front of her to keep her from walking away too easily. “For fucks’ sake, would you just pause for a second?”

She glares at him, as well as she can through the tears clouding her vision.

“Why are you crying?” He asks, his tone significantly more gentle than before, but it still doesn’t quite cross that line into genuine compassion. It makes her scoff, before she’s roughly wiping the wetness from her cheeks.

“Because,” She answers lamely, looking down at her hands to make sure she wasn’t smearing makeup all over her face. “Because— you—! Why didn’t you at least call?”

His brows furrow, not following where her argument was going.

“Or write?” She adds before he can question her. “I haven’t seen you in a year, did you just… just…” Her chest is rising and falling unsteadily as she tries to catch her breath before she starts to cry again, but her efforts are futile. The longer she looks at him and his voice of emotion, the more the urge to sob her pathetic eyes out overwhelms her. “You forgot about me” She declares, quietly, her eyes shifting between his before focusing on the ground.

“Forgot about you?” He repeats her, clicking his tongue as she shakes his head.

She refuses to look at him, so he catches her chin under his forefinger, tilting her head upwards with a surprising amount of gentleness. She still tries to glare at him, but her furrowed brows and big sad eyes do nothing to ward him off.

“(y/n), I didn’t forget about you,” He tells her with more sincerity than she’s ever heard out of him before. “I’m sorry I didn’t reach out, I really am, alright? But the old man said you were off to Tokyo and you had other— real suitors to look for,” He explains, golden eyes never once leaving hers so that she could see he was telling her the truth. “What was I supposed to do, hm? What did you want me to do?”

Her lips quiver as they move, but no real words come out. He watches as she tries, as they form various shapes but inevitably she shakes her head as another tear slips down her cheek. She doesn’t know what he should’ve done, and what she wanted was too tall of an ask.

“(y/n),” He sighs, a frown forming on his face that makes her worried about what he had to say next. “You are far too powerful, and far too desirable as a suitor to be cryin’ over someone like me, alright?” He tells her. She opens her mouth to say something, but he’s quicker. “If anything, you should’ve forgotten about me as soon as you heard we weren’t—”

“I didn’t want to,” She finally finds her voice, her nose wrinkling as she sniffles quietly. “I didn’t want to forget. I— I didn’t want to go to Tokyo to meet other suitors, I— I didn’t even want to go out with that guy back in high school, I— I just—” Her stutter worsens and Naoya fits his palm over her cheek, not knowing what to say to soothe her emotions.

Her eyes shut and she leans into the warmth of his hand. She squeezes her eyes shut even tighter as she recalls when he’d last touched her like this. He’d kissed her, then.

“I wanted more time with you. I— I thought I’d have more time with you” She admits, barely raising above a whisper.

Naoya frowns when she looks up at him, her lashes sticky from her tears, her eyes full of an emotion he didn’t know what to do with. Of course he’d sweep her off her feet and kiss her until every tear had dried if he could.

So he shakes his head at her, a sad smile on his lips as he does.

“No, pipsqueak, you don’t want that,” He tells her with as much certainty as he can muster. She argues with him as she shakes her head back at him, and he even chuckles a bit. “You don’t,” He tells her seriously. “You need to be with someone your father has approved—”

“No I don’t,” She speaks up this time, shaking her head a little more vigorously to make her point. “I don’t, I don’t need him to—”

“(y/n), I’m serious,” He tells her, cupping her face in both hands now so she had to look at him and see just how much he meant it. “You wanted out of the arrangement, remember? You have a thousand lives to live still, you said so yourself. You wanted travel? And to exorcize curses?”

She frowns as he uses her words against her, and he sighs softly, his thumb stroking over her soft cheekbone thoughtfully. He shouldn’t even be this close to her, but he can’t help it. Seeing her cry because of him had his instincts making him do crazy things he’d come to regret soon enough.

“Why can’t I have both?” She mumbles, her eyes flickering between his.

He chuckles, and for a moment he actually smiles down at her.

“We don’t always get everything we want, pipsqueak” He mumbles, his thumb trailing downwards, around her smile line, and halting just under her lower lip.

“And that’s what you want, too?” She asks him, her brows knotting together. “You don’t want to see me anymore? You want me to— to go find another suitor in someone else?”

He would literally rather be dragged to the deepest pit of hell and burn for all of eternity without a second of relief from the pain.

His brow twitches.

“If that’s what’s best for you, then, yes” Naoya answers carefully.

“That’s not a real answer” She argues.

“It is” He retorts.

“It’s not,” She leans forward, close enough and fast enough that Naoya leans away to keep the distance between them. Her brow furrows. “If you didn’t want to see me anymore, then why did you come tonight?”

His suspicions were correct. He won’t hold up well being interrogated by her.

“It’s your birthday, you invited me” He states the facts, dropping his hands from her face.

(y/n) rolls her eyes, and she’s quick to grab his wrists, and she holds on tightly, making sure there wasn’t a chance he’d yank away from her.

“For once,” Her voice is soft, pleading. “Just once, please, just be honest with me,” She begs him, her eyes wide and round and just as hopeful as her words. “Please, Naoya, just… just tell me something real”

He can’t. And even worse he shouldn’t. If he were to stand before her right now and tell her precisely how bad he wanted her, that he thought about calling or writing every day since she’s been gone, that he’d lay awake at night considering a life of an unmarried clan head that would be hated both by his own clan and every other one, just because the thought of having to marry anyone but the girl he’d sworn himself to at eight years old made him physically sick. If he was honest with her now, there would be no taking any of it back. At this point, they could be redeemed. He could leave her now, hope for the best with her life with Gojo of all people, and maybe he’d have some peace of mind knowing she was at least treated well.

But there would always be that voice. The nagging one in the back of his mind. The one that wouldn’t let him rest if he never told her the truth.

And if after all this time she’d still have him, he would allow himself to be completely, utterly hers. If she wanted a life full of travel and long distance assignments, he’d agree to it. He’d bend over backwards to meet any ridiculous condition she held, as long as it meant that at the end of the day he was hers and she was his. He didn’t need a housewife, a cook, a maid, nor a woman to carry his heirs, he wouldn’t ask anything of her for the rest of their lives as long as she would call him hers.

Naoya frowns at her as he sighs, shoulders dropping and arms loosening in her hold as she stares at him expectantly. To his surprise, when he pulls them away, she lets him. Her hands fall slack at her sides, her face shadowed with hurt as she waits for him to turn and walk away from her.

He steps forward, closing the distance between them and laying his hands under her jaw, tilting her towards him just enough so it was easier for him to bend down and slam his lips against hers.

Her own hands are grabbing onto the lapels of his jacket and pulling, pulling, pulling until he’s practically stumbling just to get a little bit closer to her. Naoya drops a hand from her face in order to curl it over her hip, squeezing tightly before wrapping his arm around her back, keeping her snug against his chest so she couldn’t pull away before he was ready to let her go.

And that time had to come at some point, even though he’d die standing here just to kiss her for a few seconds longer. They’re already panting between messy kisses, neither one of them ready to give up just yet.

“Don’t,” She mumbles in between kisses, her hands reaching up to lay around his neck, fingers carding through the hair that laid over his nape, before curling and holding on to him there. “Don’t leave”

The hand that he still had resting around her cheek squeezed softly, and the kiss he gives her with it is slower, and lingers for just a few seconds longer than before. (y/n) squeezes her eyes shut, trying to hold onto every second of it, worried he was going to decide it was the last one.

When he pulls away, he doesn’t go far. His forehead is glued to hers, and their lips brush when he speaks quietly.

“Nothing could keep me from you, princess,” He murmurs, his thumb stroking her cheek in soothing movements. “I would’ve readily, happily taken you as my wife,”

Her eyes swell with tears again, and he’s quick to brush the wetness from under her lashes before they could fall. She’s overwhelmed with emotion. She’s never heard him speak so softly, so sweetly. Her heart is beating erratically, and holds onto him a little tighter, knowing now that her feelings had been reciprocated, that she wasn’t just making things up.

“I mean it, (y/n),” He continues, eyes moving between hers. “You were everything I ever wanted. I… I couldn’t stand not having you. It was always supposed to be you and me”

A watery laugh escapes her, her lips tilting into a smile as she shuts her eyes to try and will the tears to subside.

“Y-you do, you do have me,” She tells him through a whimper, before stealing a chaste kiss and rambling on again. “It’s always been you, I always wanted it to be you,” She cries. “I— I love you, Naoya”

Her face has never burned as much as it does now. In all her years of training herself to have complete control over her emotions, it feels as though a dam has been broken clean through. The honesty with herself and with him was so long overdue, it was as though as soon as she admitted it, a weight was lifted, a blockage removed from her path, and her heart felt so full it was as though the feeling couldn’t possibly be contained just by the beating muscle. For years she found herself picking apart Zen’in Naoya, reading between backhanded comments and a cold exterior, and it was taxing work, but the reward had proven to be oh so worth it.

His lips curl into a faint smile, in pure disbelief that this was happening right now. Her hands in his hair so tightly it would hurt to move, her face so close he could kiss her without moving a full inch, everything about her, from her pretty face to her genuine words, there wasn’t a doubt in his mind how he felt about her.

His smile twists into more of a grin as he reaches his hand up to push a stray lock of hair out of her face.

“I love you too, pipsqueak,” He tells her softly, earning a sweet smile out of her. “Bit unconventional though, don’t you think?”

“Good,” She murmurs, tilting forward to brush her lips over his. “I hate the outdated bullshit” She adds in a whisper before locking her lips with his again.

Naoya kisses her deeply. He kisses her like each one was going to be their last, like this was some cruel dream that he was going to wake up from anytime now, so he’d have to savor it. (y/n) hums delightedly into his mouth, eagerly returning the long-awaited passion.

“So you don’t want to marry me now?” He teases in between a couple more kisses. (y/n) laughs, struggling to meet his lips as she does.

“I couldn’t possibly accept a proposal on my birthday,” She scolds. “You’ll have to do better than that”

“Alright, fine then,” He agrees. “If you don’t make me hang around Gojo the rest of the night, I won’t propose”

She grins, looping her arms behind his neck and tilting her head at him with an affectionate look in her eye. There wasn’t a moment that she wasn’t beautiful, but he always thought she was the most beautiful when she was looking at him. It was as though she glowed.

He’d have to find a way to make it up to her— all the time he wasted not telling her how beautiful she truly was. He’d likely spend the rest of his life reminding her, and even then, he doesn’t think it would be enough.

“You’ve got a deal, Zen’in” She replies, before tilting onto the tips of her toes again to steal one more kiss.

It would prove to be difficult to explain to her father that the man she’d previously tried to prove she didn’t love and therefore couldn’t marry is now the only one she could ever love, and that when she thought about the distant future, she could only see herself by his side, no matter his clan, it was Naoya her heart belonged to. But she’s sure she could find some way to tell him the whole story and win him over the same way she’d been won over.

And if not, there was always eloping. She was the only heir to her clan after all. How hard could it be to pull some strings in the name of young love?

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧

bonus:

To whom it may concern of the (y/l/n) estate,

While it is my understanding that your intentions aren’t to wed (y/n) off without her say in the matter, I’m writing to you to declare myself as her proper suitor. I plan on waiting a long while before officially making her my wife, but when the time is right and I’m sure that she won’t come to regret the choice, I will be taking her hand in marriage.

I’ve thought of her as my bride to be since we were children. Whether I was thrilled about the idea at the time or not, it was certain. She was my one true destiny, and that still rings true today. The truth is I love your daughter. And the prospect of making her my wife is something I’ve kept to myself for a long, long time.

When the time is right I will come to you in hopes of receiving a proper blessing. Trust that your family will have the full support and allyship for as long as we both shall live, and trust that your daughter will be in good hands, of a man who isn’t marrying out of satiating clan politics, but completely, and deeply out of his love for her.

Sincerely, Zen’in Naoya.

“Naoya?”

A tired voice from behind him has the man leaning up from his desk, just as he’s tucked his nearly written letter into a fresh envelope. (y/n) sits up slowly off the bed, rubbing one eye as she squints at him in the dark.

“What’re you doin’ up?” She mumbles. “Writing?”

“It’s nothing, pipsqueak,” He murmurs, standing from his chair and sliding it quietly back into place before making his way over to her. “Let’s go back to sleep, hm? It’s late”

“That’s what I’m sayin’,” She mumbles back at him. She coos when he’s back in bed and she’s able to curl back up on his chest. It doesn’t take long for sleep to overcome her again. “G’night” “Goodnight, my love”

[ he lives for love... ]

___

a/n: there i did it i wrote a big ol' soft piece about na*ya zen'in bcuz i have a bitchass 'i can fix him' mentality </3

xoxo ~ jordie

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the-littlest-lily · 4 months

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30 Days of G/t Self Care

I'm not fully sure where this idea came from, but here we go! I do enjoy a fun little daily challenge, and like most things my mind went to “but how can I make it G/t?” And here we are! Just in time for the new year, a 30 day self care challenge but… sizey. I wanted to make an actual calendar thing, just in time for the new year (though it can be started at any time, it's not specific to January). Check the days off, spread them out over a longer time, pick out just the ones that speak to you, whatever you want to do 😊 Here's the guide to go with it.

Day 1. Set aside a few minutes to take some deep breaths and focus on the present moment. To help ground yourself, perhaps wrap yourself in a blanket and imagine you are in a large, lovingly grasping hand, or hold a small item and imagine it's a tiny friend.

Day 2. Revisit some nostalgic G/t media. What first got you into this? Let yourself reminisce and remember why you love this in the first place.

Day 3. Make G/t art. It can be anything! Drawing, writing, crochet, pottery, you name it. No need to hold yourself to a certain standard or show anyone else, just take some time to be creative. Even if you don't deem yourself an artist, give it a shot and see if you enjoy it!

Day 4. Relax with a word search puzzle. I made a G/t themed one for you right here!

Day 5. Try out this journal prompt. If you could be tiny/big at will, what types of things would you do to relax? How might you extrapolate from this and apply it to your real life?

Day 6. Stretch your body today. What imaginary setting could you give yourself to make it G/t? Are you surrounded by gigantic furniture in your mind’s eye? Perhaps the yoga video on your phone helps you pretend you have a tiny instructor?

Day 7. Listen to some G/t music. This could be anything, from sizey music videos to songs with sizey lyrics to the Arietty soundtrack.

Day 8. Practice gratitude by listing out all the little things you're thankful for. (See what I did there?) Add some big things to the list for good measure.

Day 9. Practice stepping out of your comfort zone a little bit by talking about G/t, out loud if you’re able. Whether it's discussing with a friend (you brave soul), recording yourself on your phone (you can immediately delete it), or just mumbling to yourself in the shower. Maybe you’ll realize you want to make a G/t podcast and we all win!

Day 10. Here's a little creative prompt. Arrange everyday items to make a G/t scene (use toys, miniatures, or even fashion a tiny person out of paperclips or paper). Take a picture, share it if you like!

Day 11. Create a cozier space today to enjoy your G/t content. Grab some blankets, make yourself a snack or some tea, light some candles, whatever sounds nice to you. Sometimes it's making a mundane moment special!

Day 12. Make yourself something healthy to eat. While you prepare it, imagine how different the task might be to carry out if you were very big or very small. Maybe even have some fun making your snack in miniature too.

Day 13. Try out some affirmations today and see if you can make them both sizey and relevant to your life. Ideas of mantras could be “I am allowed to take up space,” “I choose to appreciate the little things today,” “I will achieve great things through small steps.”

Day 14. Go out into nature for some fresh air. Lean in close and pay attention to the small details, perhaps imagining a shrunken version of yourself or a small friend exploring.

Day 15. Challenge yourself to learn a new skill today to bring your Gt ideas to life. Maybe it's learning how to code, or making your own VR avatar, or learning a new art tool or technique. It's finally time to watch that tutorial you've been saving!

Day 16. Pull out your dream journal, or start up a new one! Maybe we’ll figure out the whole lucid dreaming thing and come close to experiencing Gt, wouldn't that be the dream~ If this doesn't resonate with you, maybe start a journal to jot down your Gt daydreams instead!

Day 17. Relax with a crossword puzzle. I made a G/t themed one for you right here!

Day 18. Try to cross a few to dos off your to do list someday. Make it more fun by adding in some joke tasks in there, like “leave out a snack for the fairies” or “prep for borrowing trip tonight” or “meet with giant friend for coffee.” Maybe even schedule some real life Gt tasks - such as “work on chapter 2 of (Gt story you're writing)” or “plan a VRC hangout”.

Day 19. It's time to dress the part! Is there any way you can dress up or accessorize yourself in a sizey way? Maybe you have an oversized hoodie, or a necklace of a tiny Eiffel tower, or an old shirt with Tinkerbell on it. Did you know you can actually buy Arietty’s giant hair clip thing? Or if this better scratches your creative itch, maybe your objective is to make tiny accessories for a toy or figurine.

Day 20. Take some time to rest. Just allow yourself to lay down in a quiet, cozy setting for at least a few minutes and have some dedicated G/t daydreaming.

Day 21. Try out a new exercise routine and use your G/t imaginings to make it more fun. Watching a new workout video? You’re a giant visiting the gym and that's your human instructor on the screen. Spontaneous dance session in your room? You're a fairy frolicking in a field of enormous wildflowers. Going for a swim? You're actually crossing a vast ocean, or maybe a small glass of water.

Day 22. Check out a new G/t story. Not a big reader normally? Just give it a shot!

Day 23. Give yourself a pamper night, whatever that means for you - face masks, cucumber water, a warm drink, candles, the works. Pamper night (face masks and stuff)

Day 24. Make or buy something for your G/t interests (miniatures or toys, “max”iature like a giant flower pillow, fairy-themed stationary, make a giant paper mache strawberry, etc)

Day 25. Relax with a coloring page. You can use any of your favorite artist’s lineart (just make sure to get permission and/or proper attribution if you want to post it). Here's an example option from me.

Day 26. Make a list of all the things you love about G/t. It's always nice to remember the various ways this interest might benefit our lives.

Day 27. Motivate yourself to try out a new hobby by making it G/t. Take that pottery class you've been meaning to take and make a giant acorn-shaped mug. Get into cosplay so you can dress up as a borrower. Dabble with watercolors and you may end up becoming a G/t artist. Study a new language and enjoy new sizey media you couldn't understand before. Whatever speaks to you!

Day 28. Do a favor for your future self and make a self care kit for when you're having a hard time. This could include a journal or affirmation cards, or perhaps some grounding items like fidget toys, stress balls and mints. Add a little something G/t in there too. Perhaps some kind of miniature with an interesting texture, or a fidget toy in the shape of a person, or a stuffed animal of a giant ladybug to hug.

Day 29. An act of kindness can do wonders for our mental health. Send someone in the G/t community a kind comment today, whether it's a long-time friend, someone you just met in a Discord group, or a comment to your favorite G/t artist.

Day 30. Reflect on all the activities you’ve tried during this self care challenge and journal about it. What have you learned about yourself? What might you incorporate more into your self care routines going forward? Pat yourself on the back for investing some time and attention into yourself - you deserve it!

#g/t #giant tiny #giant/tiny #gianttiny #sfwgt #gtselfcare #30 day challenge #30 days of gt

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alchely · 8 days

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My Top Gallavich fics

So, under the advice of the lovely @iangallagherisadeadman I've decided to compile a favorites Gallavich fic list along with a brief rec of each, this won't be a strict top 10 cause I'm not gonna torture myself into excluding some of these stories on some made-up self imposed arbitrary rules.

A bunch of disclaimers: most of these fics are long fics, going from 30k words up, I'm not purposefully excluding shorter fics, I have read plenty of them, but they do have a harder time sticking in my head months after reading.

Most of these fics will be explicit, just read the tags on the fic itself if you want to find out more.

Some of these fics don't have links because the authors chose to lock them and as such make them unlinkable, in order to read them you will need to go through the author's page while you're logged in your AO3 account.

This ended up ballooning out of control and is A LOT longer than ten fics, I apologize in advance :p.

YOU'LL NEVER SEE US AGAIN – spoonfulstar - 231k words

Mickey and Ian have been students at Marceline boarding school their whole lives, as their time at the institute draws toward the end they will start to discover many things, about themselves, about each other and about the world they live in.

THIS FIC! I CRIED! The number of fanfiction that are able to make me cry can be counted on a singular hand, the emotional stakes get higher and higher as the story goes on, leading to a beautiful and bittersweet climax.

This story will make you think and feel deeply about topics you'd never think a shameless fic would delve into.

I am obsessed with Mickey in this fic, he and Ian grow up in an environment that could not be more removed from South Side Chicago and yet his personality is still so recognizably and distinctly Mickey.

The story goes very dark at times, and the fic itself could be considered lengthy, but I assure you the author has made sure to not make you feel it. Those 200k words flowed so well the story did not feel long at all.

HELP ME (TEAR DOWN MY REASON) – wehangout - 34k words

Mickey is a detective and Ian becomes a suspect in an investigation except Mickey already knows him because he's his favorite dancer.

This fic falls under the umbrella of fics where “Mickey is so in love with Ian he does something unbelievably crazy”.

Oooh boy, this fic, it's written in second person (yes you've read that right), tbh out of all fics I've read from this author I think this one was the easiest to adjust mentally to the change in perspective.

I loved Mickey’s “love” in this, just… This raw connection to Ian, the perfect cocktail of feelings, I could read that all day long.

IN ANOTHER WORLD – Roryonic - 249k words

Mickey does not get sent to prison at the end of S5, what happens after and how his presence influences future events (mostly Ian, but also every other Gallagher as well as his own family).

As far as I'm concerned this fic is the closest to a perfect S6 and beyond fix-it. The dialogue writing in this story is so close to canon Shameless that I could picture entire scenes in my head with the actors playing the characters, with their body and personality quirks.

Sometimes I find myself describing this fic like it's the actual show's deleted scenes, “Look, Mickey has his own storyline! And Mandy is here! And the existence of Yevgeni does not become a plot hole!”

There are some Mickey lines in this fic that to me are as canon as if they'd been in the show. Absolutely iconic writing.

I love this author so here's a rec of some of their other longfics, however I highly suggest a lot of their other much shorter stuff as well:

BATTLESHIPS AND LOVE BOATS: Ian and Mickey start their “no strings attached” kind of sex relationship a little later than canon but their attraction and love is just as strong. This is a sort of High School AU that turns into a Prison AU that turns into something else and every shift is just as lovely as the next.

YOU SMELL LIKE LOVE: Ian and Mickey are childhood friends, to the point that the rest of the Gallaghers might as well consider Mickey a seventh brother, mmmh, I sure wonder how things will start to change. Look, I never thought I'd love a childhood friends AU for Gallavich yet here I am, if it's good it's good.

ME AND THE DEVIL: Mickey unconsciously calls for a vengeance demon and Ian Gallagher shows up at his door, because Mickey is a stubborn dumbass they fall in love instead. This story has a lot of twists and turns and the premise is only the very beginning of the story. I LOVED it!

THE INCREASINGLY POOR DECISIONS OF IAN GALLAGHER – Shamelessquestions - 309k words

Ian is a dancer in a club, he accidentally gets involved in the affair of a dangerous mafia don, but the true danger is the attraction he and the mafioso’s right hand Mickey feel for each other as soon as they meet.

What. A. Classic. Truly, an unforgettable story, and I don't mean this in hyperbole, I read this story around… 2016/2017 during my second round in the Shameless fandom, then I read countless other fics in a lot of other fandom and yet this story was the only one that my mind retained from back then, to the point that I could still remember some of the finer details as well as the final plot twists when I came back to reread it.

The plot is constructed beautifully and the original characters (part of the Shamelessquestions fanfiction universe, as they come back time and time again in every one of their AU to fulfill their role in the story) are just as vibrant.

What a story, truly.

Favorite original character in this AU: Sal, his downfall is so satisfying and yet so pitiful to read.

TEENAGERS SCARE THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME – Mellow_Yellow - 221k words

Ian finds something scary and calls Mickey for help, even though they had only reconnected that very day after two years of not seeing each other. Together, they get sucked into a situation they weren't at all prepared for. Can they even admit that they're in over their head?

The very beginning of this fic is SO cinematic it grabbed my interest from the very first scene and didn't let go until the end, DO NOT search for spoilers.

The only warning I'll give is that it does deal with a bit of gore and what I'm personally gonna define as slight psychological horror. That's it. Enjoy!

BROKE STRAIGHT BOYS – dancermk - 66k words

Mickey becomes a porn actor for a site where he has to pretend he's straight and not enjoying the copious amount of gay sex he's having on camera, enter Ian, another actor under the same agency and their off the chart physical chemistry.

This story has, needless to say, some really, really good smut. I especially loved their first time together, but every sex scene in this story is seared in my mind.

ETHERIZED AGAINST THE SKY – Snarfle - 213k words

So, I debated whether I should add this fic or not, but I think if there is one fic that will stay in my mind long after this Shameless binge of the past couple of months it's this one, and it should absolutely become one of those fic that everyone in the fandom should read.

After Mickey gets shot by Kash his life takes a completely different direction and he ends up in a group home where, through many difficult times, he turns his life around.

So many iconic moments in this fic, some funny as fuck, some sad, some so absurd that I'm surprised they weren't lifted straight from Shameless, one so gruesome in the very first chapter that I was surprised to have such a visceral feeling from just words on a screen. Yeah, this story will stay with me for a long time.

OLD RULES FOR NEW SIDE PIECES – Shamelessquestions - 217k words

Ian is a Fed and he spots Mickey looking suspicious in an art museum, the mutual attraction is overwhelming, Mickey is not what he seems and Ian is already with someone else, but that's not gonna stop him from pursuing what he and Mickey have.

Putting it as bluntly as I can, this fic made me face the realization that I love cheating fics (if the cheating happens to someone else to bring together the endgame couple). I have already reread this fic twice and I could probably go for another one and not get tired of it, it's that good, and out of all this author's fics it's probably my favorite.

Favorite original characters in this AU: It's a three way tie between Dre, Ivan and Carrie, they're all very captivating in this story.

Other fic from this author I'd recommend cause I really love their style:

LOST IN TRANSLATION: Ian meets a very attractive man while he's in Ukraine who doesn't speak English, a mere language barrier won't stop him from flirting for hours. (adorable)

YOU MAKE ME FEEL HUMAN – Dragona - 66k words

Ian is an assassin, he meets Mickey and thus begins a very sick love story.

To say I'm obsessed with this fic is an understatement, I suggest to everyone to just go read the original author’s own description of the fic, it sets the tone of the story magnificently.

This is an Ian Gallagher that almost resembles Jerome (also played by Cameron in Gotham) but like… a slightly more subdued and saner S1/S2 version of him. I love the layers that get peeled right in front of my eyes, the madness that creeps in a bit more every chapter. I LOVE this story.

DRIED INK - 87k words

This fic combines my two favorite Gallavich-specific tropes, one being ‘Mickey comes back from prison after s6, Ian is with someone else’ and ‘Ian cheats on that someone else for Mickey’

I love the Gallaghers in this and how unsurprised they are at Ian going back to Mickey right away. It's a little jewel of a fic.

Mickey tries SO hard to stop himself and Ian in this but their love is too magnetic, they're irresistible to each other.

THE QUESTION OF NORMAL – blue_newman - 92k words

Ian is a prison counselor, Mickey is in prison, they fall in love and it's beautiful and Ian is incredibly devoted to Mickey in this fic and I fell in love with them both in this.

KINDA RAW – catgrassplantdad - 6k

Quite simply this is my favorite short pwp fic.

Illustrating those “five times” in one night that Mickey references in 11x01.

This fic is so hot, I love it <3

QUATERVOIS – DodgerBear - 51k words

Soldier Mickey gets stationed in the middle of nowhere and meets a farmer called Ian who makes him question everything.

Falling under the same umbrella of “Mickey does something crazy for Ian” fics and this is why it stuck in my mind even if it's been a while since I've read it.

I LOVE this story, their dialogues and everything that happens in it. The setting is lovely and you will fall in love with the description of Ian’s farm.

Other fic by the same author that I also loved:

BURDEN OF PROOF: Cop Mickey gets caught in a legal battle between the two oldest Gallagher brothers, something doesn't feel right though…

THE WORDS HE DOESN'T SAY: Mickey is released before Ian in s10 and has to meet a court-mandated therapist. The story is from the therapist POV and goes AU from the beginning of s10 in that Mickey gets involved back into Yev and Svetlana’s life, the dialogue is, quite obviously, the main attraction of the story and it's really well done. (Also, written in first person).

THE MENAGERIE – CrossMyDNA - 147k words

Ian decides to re-explore his bdsm preferences at The Menagerie where he meets sub extraordinaire Mickey on his very first visit.

Shameless is undoubtedly the fandom that opened my eyes to what bdsm could be back in… approx 2016? When that other popular bdsm fic was still around *ahem*.

So it definitely feels like a sign that coming back into the fandom this fic now exists and is SO GOOD.

Obviously it's very explicit, the smut in this fic is one of the best I've ever read.

The chemistry between Ian and Mickey sizzles off the screen and can absolutely be felt even in moments not of the nsfw variety, absolutely recommended!

MICKEY MILKOVICH’S GUIDE TO FLIRTING – whatwouldmickeydo - 40k words

An s2 “missing moments” between Gallavich, completely canon compliant, all under the pretense that Mickey is following a step by step guide to flirting.

I wish this fic was describing canon moments, not kidding a single bit, I wish I could somehow magically manifest these scenes into existence they're that good and fit that well into canon.

M8TE – gallawitch - 53k words

Omegaverse fic where Ian and Mickey both start using an app and end up matching with each other, even though a connection is made almost instinctively, coming to terms with it with a sound mind will take a bit longer…

Hey,had to have at least one of these on here lol

I love omegaverse and this was everything I wanted from it, couldn't have asked for anything better really <3.

SHACKLED – MyRelapse - 19k words

Ian has a change of heart and he decides that Mickey IS the one he wants, even if he's still in prison, so he keeps in contact and goes through every hoop imaginable to have him back as soon as possible.

Reading this made me so happy like I could burst, love it.

WAITING ON MY OWN TOO LONG – Ride4812 - 266k words

This rec more than any other on this list is what I'm gonna consider self indulgent because it covers the trope I always craved to read in such a satisfying way: Canon AU where Mickey comes back from prison after 8 years, Ian has found someone else but the moment the two meet again they fall back into each other right away.

The series is made up of 4 smaller fics:

One more night

Something more this time

No more lonely nights

Ain't this life so sweet

(I will point out here and nowhere else that the last installment of this series has some segment that probably needed to be re-read a couple more times, but by that point I was too invested, and the quality fluctuates a lot only in certain parts)

The writing style is very direct and to the point, which I love, the smut is very present and written beautifully and most importantly never boring.

Ian is a MESS in this fic and had me Stressed™, mostly cause for some reason I can't handle too much casual depiction of drug abuse and addiction (I know, ironic considering the fandom).

Conflicts and resolutions are never clean cut, they don't necessarily resolve quickly or definitely or the way you probably imagine they should and I find this level of realism very satisfying.

Taking a bit of space here at the end to also rec a couple other Ride4812 fics that I also loved:

COUP DE FOUDRE - A model/photographer AU where Ian and Mickey fall in love the instant they meet and do some crazy things because of that.

HOPE HE MIGHT - A lawyer AU where Ian and Mickey are on opposing sides for the same client, an interesting murder mystery steeped in a religious cult.

Generally I feel like this author is really good at depicting just how unapproachable Mickey can be to anyone that isn't called Ian Gallagher and I eat it up every time.

WHAT THE NIGHT DOES TO THE DAY – andchaos - 9k words

A Gallavich childhood friends AU with a quite original arrangement for the story and the various segments of their lives. Very satisfying read.

RANSOM – BeckyHarvey29 - 112k words

Terry sends his sons to kidnap a Gallagher child to force Frank into paying back the money he owes, unfortunately for him Mickey and his brothers kidnap Ian, and a whole other kind of story unfolds.

Mickey and Ian falling in love in this fic is such a good read. I don't wanna spoil anything of how that or the kidnapping plot goes, since the two are so intertwined. Just know that it will be worth it.

UNDER LOCK AND KEY – Suzy_Queue - 106k words

Ian is assigned the night shift at his new job where he provides spare keys to his fellow college students stuck outside their dorm rooms. To make matters worse his shift coworker is the oh so infamous Mickey Milkovich.

I am magnetized by the way this author writes their pining for each other, their attraction and obsession, how it blooms and unfolds. This fic in particular had me develop a very bad case of tunnel vision, couldn't really turn away until I finished reading it all.

I still haven't read everything this author has to offer, but so far I also loved:

INHUMAN: A mysterious force starts attacking people close to Mickey and it all seems to lead to a mysterious redhead Mickey is oh so coincidentally obsessed with. Very cool paranormal story.

THESE FOOLISH GAMES: Mickey takes over as the boss of the local branch of a trampoline park, where Ian is one of the employees, they annoy each other to no end but what they don't know is that they're secretly texting each other.

IS THERE SOMEWHERE – andchaos - 48k words

Mickey is born with no words on his skin, convinced he's going to live a life of misery cause no one will ever say the words he's destined to hear, he's not a very happy guy. Here comes mute boy Ian who crashes into his life and won't let go.

A classic Soulmate AU, I love that like in a lot of other Gallavich fics their physical connection and compatibility usually comes before their emotional one, it is one aspect that I feel distinguishes their relationship to many other fandom’s ships.

LAST NIGHT AT THE VERONA GRAND HOTEL – the_rat_wins - 27k words

Mickey starts working at an ancient hotel who's supposedly haunted. Mickey doesn't believe in ghost stories, he is much more interested in this one guest he meets at night during his shift.

What a cinematic experience this fic is! Absolutely recommended, the length of it makes it so you can read it in the same time it would take to watch the same story in movie format.

Other fics by the same authors that have impressed me:

FADE THIS ONE TO BLACK: Ian dies of overdose in a pile of snow outside the club, when Mickey finds him there he vows to do anything to get him back.

I don't know why but this fic in particular gives off the vibes of being a pilot for a ya urban fantasy TV series, except we gotta imagine everything that comes after the first episode lol

NO LIE: Ian and Mickey are Soulmates and as such they can't lie to each other. This series is short and sweet and full of feelings, perfect

PARAGRAPHS – pink_ink - 100k words

Ian becomes a reading tutor for ex-convicts, Mickey is among them and Ian starts paying him more and more attention.

This is a story where they meet under very different circumstances and where they've lived slightly different lives compared to canon and yet they're still able to find each other in the end.

Also, sign me up for every fic where Ian has to work just as hard to help Mickey and care for him as the opposite, where Ian's brand of stubbornness is the only way to get through to Mickey.

I'm also adding a couple of ongoing fics, just two to not overwhelm too much.

NONE THE WISER – Loftec - ~218k words

Ian starts visiting Mickey’s diner, it takes a while and yet no time at all to warm up to each other.

I'm captivated by the author's writing style. I love Ian's and Mickey’s relationship. I love how they sort of take their time and yet pine helplessly for each other.

I'm obsessed with the fact that the whole point of the fic doesn't appear until two thirds of the way in cause the diner scenes were just too good to pass up on lol (and I 100% agree with them).

INTRO TO QUANTUM DATING – spoonfulstar - ~563k words

Canon Mickey and Ian meet in University. A college slice of life but drenched in the casual (and not so casual) darkness of canon shameless.

The dark humor in this is fenomenal and left me gasping laughing so many times.

Unexpectedly Ian in this fic is pursuing a linguistics oriented degree, which was what I studied when I tried university, the topics are explained in such an accurate way I have to assume the author studied them themselves and that this story is somewhat a reimagining of their own college experience because if not this would be an absurd amount of accurate research to make.

Reading this fic feels like living through the American college experience from the comfort of my home lol.

As I said before, this author's way of writing does not weight you down even with its length, the story flows perfectly from one scene to the next and before you realize it you've reached the end and you have to accept that 500k words weren't even enough.

Let's end this list with some quick recommendations

WHILE WE'RE MAKING OTHER (PEOPLE'S) PLANS - kyasticlikestea

Mickey is volunteered to organize someone's else's wedding after he managed to salvage his own so well, he'll do it, but his own Southside way.

THIS IS THE ROAD TO RUIN - bricoleur10

Ian and Mickey never go to rob Ned, the story unfolds differently from there. A fix-it with a lot of Gallavich longing , very good smut and some really good dialogue.

HEY, HONEY MINE (I WAS THERE ALL THE TIME) - serveteas

Mickey talks about his crush with Iggy and accidentally pronoun-slips. Short, to the point, funny af and I just really love it. Takes place after their fight at Kash’n Grab in s2.

AGAINST GLASS - AllThatMatters

Ian gets traded from one club to another as a dancer (and more) and ends up in the Milkovich family's club. This is a Mafia!Mickey story with some pretty tight sub-plots, I love his brothers in this.

ONE OF A KIND - fckyeahgallavich

Mickey breaks his finger and it has to be set in the hospital, chaos - of the homophobic kind - ensues. Protective!Ian, I wanna hug Mickey in this.

IAN THE FRIENDLY GHOST - Ravenheart

Ian is haunting an apartment and Mickey starts living in it, Ian is maybe starting to have a crush on him. This isn't angsty!

BLOOD IN, BLEED OUT - brewrosemilk, Whatsastory

Historical AU. Perfectly innocent bystander Ian Gallagher is thrown into the affairs of the Ukrainian Mafia back in 1954, his relationship with Mickey will span decades and he won't remain innocent for long, the mafia can corrupt anyone.

TEENAGE RUNAWAY - sadwhales

Ian comes to live and finish high school with his half siblings on the South Side, he's immediately captivated by a boy sitting under the bleachers, maybe his North Side naivety will catch his attention too.

GARDEN SONG - melwrtiesthings

A glimpse into their lives in their West Side apartment, a lot of initial angst due to a manic episode and then a lot of recovery and healing and learning more about themselves.

#gallavich #shameless #Gallavich fic rec #fic rec #ao3 #fic rec taken wayyy too seriously #jesus what is wrong with me #f*ck it I'll just tag this now and deal with the links later #if anyone wants to contribute to the list through tags or comments you are WELCOME ❤️#my post

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