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#crying like omi
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Major Shōgun Ep. 9 spoilers:
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Yabushige truly gives meaning to the term 'rat bastard'. Toranaga factored his inevitable betrayal into his plans, and Yabushige STILL somehow managed to spring a surprise betrayal. If it wasn't so horrible, it would be impressive how two-faced the man manages to be.
So, about Mariko .... (I'm actually glad I randomly got spoiled the day before seeing this episode and was prepared otherwise I would not have survived what happened to her.)
My take ... Mariko's death was 'pointless' in the same way Nagakado's death was pointless. Nagakado died a senseless death that failed to accomplish anything, but then Toranaga gave his son's death meaning and honour by thanking Nagakado for dying to earn him some time. Mariko blocking the door with her own body served nothing in the sense that it wouldn't prevent Ishido's men from getting in nor did it change the fate of anyone else in that room. But by choosing to sacrifice herself like that and die at the hands of Ishido's agents, Mariko derailed Ishido's plan to take her captive and ensured she'd become a martyr to Toranaga's cause. Mariko not only fulfilled Toranaga's plan, she exceeded it.
Mariko's mission was to get the hostages freed or die trying and in so doing force Ishido to dishonour himself by openly revealing his hand instead of keeping up the facade that he's not keeping anyone against their will. Mariko did both: got the hostages freed and died a martyr to the cause. (Yes, Ishido may choose to turn around and keep the hostages anyway instead of releasing them as agreed, but in doing so he'll only dishonour himself further and lose more support.)
When Toranaga gets to Osaka, he'll have the moral highground and the support of the other samurai families who didn't want Mariko to die like that and who now see Ishido for what he really is. (Also, when the time comes, I think the Christian Regents will now be prepared to turn against Ishido.)
And Mariko got what she'd wanted all along: dying with honour in response to what happened to her family. Her death was meaningful. She served her duty like her father told her to. And she got to spend her last night being at peace and experiencing something like happiness with John.
Buntaro dishonoured her for so many years by keeping her alive for selfish reasons and when he finally offered her the release of death, it was also for selfish reasons. Buntaro was only willing to allow her to finally die because HE wanted to die then and wouldn't be affected by her death since he'd be gone too. Buntaro ordered Mariko to stay alive. John asked Mariko to stay alive many times, and when she ultimately wouldn't change her mind, he not only accepted and respected her decision, he honoured it by offering to second her. Mariko died knowing John finally understood. He finally got it.
Mariko died, and now she is finally free.
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EDIT to add:
She died calling herself Akechi Mariko instead of Toda Mariko. She disavowed her husband and her unwanted marriage with her last words. She was truly freeing herself!!!
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drawnfamiliarfaces · 1 month
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i... wrote a smol fic (っ´▽`*)っ
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also!!!!! If you haven't seen it - shoutout to first ever published fic in Ninja Showdown/My Immortal Soul tags - Lustrous Red by @missadmyre !!!
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depressedzelda · 19 hours
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You shouldn't have to go to work if you have a horrible terrible dream of one of your worst fears right before you get up thats what I think
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everwisp · 1 year
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shoot-of-corruption · 9 months
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L: Your favorite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for?
Q: A ship you’ve abandoned and why.
Z: What's a ship that you want to ship publicly, but everyone on tumblr hates it so you keep your mouth shut about it?
C: A pairing you wish you shipped, but just can't.
Fandom-Related Questions
L: Your favorite fanartist/author gives you one request, what do you ask for? That is actually hard. I have such self centered ideas of the characters that I RP as, that I realize, others likely feel very differently about them. I would probably ask them to display the character that is probably most centered as their muse and display them in the unique way they feel them as. Like a OneShot of their muse, very much being in tune with themselves or a drawing of them in their purest form, that is most themselves. Just the impression that gives them life. That is probably the most intense thing you can see... and also do. It costs a lot of energy. But that is what I would want to see the most.
Q: A ship you’ve abandoned and why. Well.... in all honesty, I used to Fearship at some point - since I never saw Mariku as a part of the Ishtar family per choice. But this shipping got out of hand for me and actually is the closest to incest one could see, so I have abandoned it by now. Also it was so fucking toxic >_>
Z: What's a ship that you want to ship publicly, but everyone on tumblr hates it so you keep your mouth shut about it?
*dances like a goblin and shoves her trash in your face*
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*cries softly in a corner* I mean I get it... I understand... but honestly they could work non-toxically in the aftermath and nobody ever wants that... I WANT THAT! They would be BADASS.
C: A pairing you wish you shipped, but just can't.
*begs to the gods that listen so I won't be decapitated in the next 5 seconds*
... Thiefshipping. HEAR ME OUT.
I absolutely understand this shipping. I also think they deserve the best and I can SEE how they work together and I wish everybody the best happiness with shipping them. I personally wish I could feel anything when I look at thiefshipping... but it literally does nothing to me.
It's not giving me anything >_< I am so sorry... please don't kill me.
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ominoose · 8 months
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Man just fuckin roasted me.
THATS FUCKING FOUL LMAOOOO
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Chase: You know, there is only one person in the world that can tell you what you are Omi, hope in his eyes: Me? Chase: No, me. You're an excellent warrior who will remain by my side once I conquer the world. Omi, annoyed: NOT AGAIN with the MIND GAMES!
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a3songtournament · 11 months
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INTERMISSION POLL 18 - BEST ROOM 105 SINGER
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homosubtext · 1 year
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cruel summer atsumu update patch 1.2: i know i may have only heard cruel summer like twice in my life but i think this could use some questionable font choices too
incredible. amazing. wonderful. ash u have done it again
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minkkumaz · 9 months
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school is over im feeling silly
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suna-cerely-yours · 1 year
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i know ft kiyoomi
warnings: fem!bodied reader, dirty talk, public indecency, mentions of bondage, unedited.
“kiyo would you rather fuck someone wearing a black dress or a white one?”
sakusa lifts his eyes from his phone, fixing you with an incredulous look.
"why are you asking me that in the middle of a very public dressing room, which i'm probably not even supposed to be in right now?"
"it's literally 2pm and the store is practically empty kiyo. besides, i doubt the workers are paid enough to care anyway."
"that's not what i asked."
rolling your eyes, you push the door of the dressing room open further, revealing the short, white dress you had on.
"i haven't been laid in such a long time, and i have a good feeling about this weekend. i wanna make sure i look, y'know, fuckable or something."
a muscle in sakusa's jaw twitches as he glances over the dress, still leaning against the wall opposite to your dressing room, phone clutched in hand.
"okay, first of all fuckable isn't a real word. secondly, what sort of bastard are you dating who'll decide if he likes you based on your dress?"
pressing your lips together you squint at him, walking forward to grab his arm.
"ki-yo-omi, it's not that deep, just tell me if you would rather fuck someone in a white dress or a black one."
"if it's someone i'm interested in, their clothing would not matter."
hiding a grin, you shake your head slightly. your best friend really was leagues apart from most men you had met.
"okay so the white one then?"
shrugging, sakusa straightens, slipping his phone into the pocket of his dark slacks. "get whatever dress you want, if you'd like i could buy you both."
"kiyo, just say you wouldn't fuck me next time," you whine, "stop avoiding the question."
a hand catches your wrist as you turn to go back to change your clothes, sakusa's fingers warm against your skin.
"i never said i wouldn't fu- i wouldn't have sex with you. stop putting words into my mouth."
"fuck kiyo, fuck me. say it properly c'mon, we're not kids anymore."
scowling he lets go of your hand, "don't be a brat."
"oh yeah? and what are you going to do about it?"
you hear him scoff as you move to close the door, only to have the door be pushed back and find yourself pushed against a mirrored wall, the door clicking closed behind sakusa.
"kiyo, what the hell-"
"you think i don't want to fuck you? you think i don't fantasize about tying you up and making you beg for me?"
he moves closer, pressing a hand to the mirror beside your head, the other hand slipping inside your dress to grip your hip.
"do you have any idea what you do to me? how i feel like a complete caveman, devoid of any sense of rationality every time you show up in those little skirts? all i can ever think of is how much i want to flip them up and fuck you until you cry."
you whimper, pussy clenching around nothing as sakusa's lips brush against yours', his thumb lazily stroking hipbone.
"every time you come whining about how some boy couldn't make you cum, or left you unsatisfied, all i can think of is how i could make you cum without even making you take any clothes off- how i could make you cream around my dick so many times.
your lips part, as you moan, sakusa's fingers now slipping into your soaked panties.
fingers lightly tracing your pussy, he sighs into the crook of your neck.
" i would fuck you in each and every one of your dresses."
your eyes slide shut as he presses down your throbbing clit, head hitting against the mirror with a thud.
however instead of continuing, he moves away, "i'll pay for both dresses and meet you outside, i'm sure he'll fuck you regardless."
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scnrisa · 2 years
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thinking about a kh oc...
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natriae · 11 months
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Dad!haikyuu is everything! I imagine Omi being your fake date to a family gathering and he swoons at your interaction with the kids until an auntie shoves a baby in his arms and he’s like UHHHHH 🧍🏻”don’tcrushthisbaby don’tcrushthisbaby” And now everyone including yourself can’t take their eyes off him 😭😭😭😭
STOP I LOVE THIS
warnings: fake dating, fluff, cue flustered kiyoomi
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One month ago Sakusa Kiyoomi took you aside during one of your usual hangouts with Atsumu to ask if you could pretend to be his girlfriend. Your brain told you over and over that this is a terrible idea, but you couldn't help yourself and said yes. Plus, it was one night at his mom's house. You already knew his family it wouldn't be to shocking to see you by Kiyoomi's side.
That's the thing. Your heart strings started to be pulled on the moment the two of you walked through the door and Kiyoomi let out a short, quiet "we're dating now." His mom's only response was to pull you into a hug and explain how she's been waiting forever for this. After greeting the two of you she told everyone the good news.
You felt terribly guilty for lying to her but Sakusa seemed unbothered. Maybe you were just being dramatic about the whole situation.
Somehow mid-way through the night you ended up spending most of your time with Kiyoomi's sister's kids. She was your favorite Sakusa. She also was the only one who knew you had a crush on her brother since middle school. She would help you get pretty for him, but it never worked. She claimed it did, but you never saw any progress. You and the children were in the basement playing with toys while a random kids TV show played in the background. The characters would sing and save the day successfully holding the attention of the youngest Sakusa. She isn't even one yet, but she has the whole family whipped except Kiyoomi of course. For some reason he tries to stay away from her leading you to never actually meeting the little one til today. She was adorable. She'd bounce her arms up and down while babbling to the song. In front of you was her older brother, and Kiyoomi's first nephew. He had toy trucks and a few random characters from animes you know and some you don't. You were helping zoom the cars around the basement, crawling on your knees still you looked up to see Kiyoomi has finally decided to spend time with you. You could have swore you saw his lip twitch before he stepped pass you and sat on the couch switching the TV channel.
Kaia, the youngest, immediately started crying when she couldn't hear the joy of a few cartoon pups saving the day. Quickly you ran over to her picking her up to help calm her down. You lightly bounced her on your hip while giving small shushes to the baby. You walked away from Kiyoomi because your pretty convinced by his actions that he doesn't like children. Which tears a bit of you heart knowing that you always imagined what having kids with him would be like. What a great dad he would be, but that's all in your imagination. The little girl begins to quiet down as you lift her up so she can stuff her head into your neck.
From across the room Kiyoomi watches you calm the baby with a red face. How are you so good at this? He's never seen you with a baby and from what he knows your not an aunt of any sort, unless you count Atsumu's dogs. He finally lets out a small smile as he watches you bring the baby up so she can snuggle into your neck, but as if the gods are against him. You turn around to see him watching you, and you tell the baby with a slight smirk, "baby I think your uncle Kiy wants to apologize," you walk over still holding the baby like a natural. Finally setting her down to crawl over to him on the couch. The older man trys to hold the baby like a puppy. He's never done this before and he's never felt embarrassed in his life. You giggle softly at his nervous face and tell him, "Kiyoomi that's not how you hold a baby," he can barely focus on your words when your giggles are enough for him to worship the group you walk on. He swears he enters heaven the moment he hears that sound. "it's good that your holding her butt but i think she wants to be facing you," You say as you scoot closer and reach to try and show him the proper way.
Kiyoomi leaned back on the couch and attempted to correctly hold the baby on his chest. One hand on her back and the other holding her butt up. As if Kiyoomi was a sleeping pill the little girl immediately closed her eyes and fell asleep on the tall man. "see it's not hard. Do you wanna take her to her momma? She seems sleepy," you said with small smile on your face. Not forgetting the little boy playing behind the couch you glanced over to make sure he was okay. God, Kiyoomi could help but want to ask if you wanted to be a mom right now.
Unmoving Kiyoomi stiffly shakes his head no at the though of having to hold this baby while moving. You srunch your eyebrows together in thought trying to understand why he's so stiff. noticing your confusion he squeaks out, "What if I break her?" and at first you thought he was joking but there was genuine panic in his features. He thought he was this cool collected guy, but you could honestly read him like a book.
"i'll be right here, okay? You're not going to break her," You nodded your head while you spoke to him in the calmest voice you could muster. Slowly he stood up and you redirected his hand so that it held up some of her head too along with her back. "you need to keep her head up. Baby's head's are weak," he nodded his head at your words like they were the gospel. Anything you said he would take it as the truth. If you said it, it was right. Cautiously walking up the steps to the family room. His whole family seems shocked to see the large man holding such a delicate baby. He takes a deep breath while he tries to pass the sleeping girl to his sister.
"whoa, what did you do to her? She never sleeps this heavy." His sister said in shock, "Kiyoomi you need to hold her more often," she continued. Then did you finally take in how red his face was. He was so flustered it was adorable. Quickly you took your phone out and snapped a picture of the boy without his knowledge.
bonus:
It was late and about everyone at the gathering had left except for Kiyoomi's immediate family. The baby girl was back in your and Kiyoomi's lap trying to decide who she wants to get attention from. You and Kiyoomi were shoulder to shoulder and at one point he brought his arm over to hold you even closer. After falling a few times on Kiyoomi and then gripping his shirt like a life line the little girl turned and crawled into your lap. You let a small Ha at Kiyoomi for her ultimately choosing you, but you take it back once the little girl tried pulling the top of you dress down to get to your boob. Kiyoomi quickly grabs the little girl and she starts crying sad that she didn't get fed. If you heard correctly you swore you heard him tell the little one that you would have milk soon but not now.
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forusomimiya · 11 months
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𝔽𝕠𝕦𝕣’𝕤 𝕒 𝕔𝕣𝕠𝕨𝕕
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⚜️𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨: 𝘮𝘴𝘣𝘺4!𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴𝘬𝘪𝘱 𝘹 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘢𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳
⚜️𝘨𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘦: 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵
⚜️𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 1,4𝘬
⚜️𝘤𝘸: 𝘥𝘰𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘬, 𝘥𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘯𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳, 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘦, 𝘥𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘺𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘢. (¡𝘔𝘐𝘕𝘖𝘙𝘚 𝘋𝘖𝘕𝘛 𝘙𝘌𝘈𝘋 𝘐𝘛!)
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You don't remember how you ended up here, or maybe you do, but you don't remember what led you to make this decision, what went through your wonderful head making you think this would be a good idea.
Because it wasn't just good, it was the best.
A couple of drinks after your first face-to-face game with the team, glances and approaches, brought you, the rookie manager of the black jackals and the four worst men you could have ever met, to spend "a little good time" at your hotel.
It wasn't the first time they got together and talked about how you flirted with each of them or how you enticed them to have a quick, sneaky encounter in the locker room. What they didn't know is that while they were getting hard talking about you, you were in your room cumming on your fingers more than three times in a row, imagining an orgy with them.
And there you were, rejoicing and getting what you had wanted to happen for months.
"Little whore in heat... if you're going to keep looking at me like that while 'm fucking that mouth, I swear I'm going to make a mess on yar pretty face. And I don't think Sakusa likes it when someone messes up what's his, do you Omi-kun?" Atsumu's words are choppy with each thrust and with each touch of his tip at the end of your throat. His muscles begin to weaken but for his life, he will not stop until he has accomplished his goal.
"Just shut your fucking mouth and keep going, Miya. It keeps getting tighter every time you go in deeper."
"Ignore him Atsumu. Down here I can see how he enjoys every praise you give her" you only have a second to switch from focusing on Atsumu's cock to Hinata's and Sakusa's, both alternating to hit your fragile spot and making you moan long and hard as you gargle with Atsumu's cock.
"Holy fuck, so pretty like that… drooling all over my cock…” you moan in pain as you open your mouth wider. Your jaw will remind you tomorrow. "Awww… it hurts… Easy doll, I'll cum in no time and your mouth can rest. But first let me torture ya some more." His hips slam faster into your mouth, causing you to gag and your throat to itch, before you start to tear up.
"Hah, she's already in tears. Poor baby… maybe three cocks aren't enough for her. Maybe ya should slow down your movements, Atsumu…. What do you think? I'd like to have her mouth intact for a while from now" deaf ears to the words of Bokuto, who stands to the side squeezing the base of his cock and stroking the tip, mesmerised by the movement of your tits bouncing back and forth. Atsumu's hands on the back of your neck force you deeper into him, and even though it's your first time sucking him, you know what it means, so you look up and confirm your intuition when you see his eyebrows draw together and his mouth form an "O".
"Ahh keep crying… keep crying for my cock… nngh f-fuck! Keep it up, keep it up!" Quickly the thick, warm liquid runs down your throat and you can only continue to watch him, biting his lip as he is consumed by pleasure and continues to spill now onto your tongue. You swallow, frowning at the bitter taste. It's not pleasant, but fuck, you're a slut at sex, and you like to show it off.
"Damn… you swallowed it?" You nod and lick the remainder left on your lips, sobbing and whimpering because even though your mouth is now empty, your pussy is still filled by two cocks. "Good girl" you smile as he strokes your head, enticing you to close your eyes and appreciate his sweet touch. Atsumu could change his ways with you whenever he wanted.
You were fascinated by the way he was sometimes gentle with you in training, giving you his attention and care. Giving you advice on how to improve or cheering you up when you were down. Other times, he would catch you off guard from behind when no one was watching and he would fawn in your ear about what a good girl you were when you offered him water or towels to wipe off your sweat. He always said he'd thank you later, but it never happened. Until now.
Men who have you dripping, panting and cursing bring you back to enjoy them.
"M-more please… want more, so good…" Sakusa squeezes your hips and increases the strokes, obeying your pleas, grunting with each time you clench around him.
"Fuck… gonna fill this fucking pussy to the last drop. You're taking me so well that i think i wanna do it again…" but you can't take any more. The support of your arms on the bed trembles with each thrust, and the speed and joy of feeling the friction of both cocks in you doesn't help. "Just a little more kitten, just a little more…". You moan louder and louder and beg to go faster, though Hinata, slowly torturing you and dismissing that option, continues to enjoy every inch of your pussy opening up for him, willing to spend the time needed.
"P-please… faster… more - faster."
"Sshh be good for us baby, just have fun and keep squeezing for us, yeah? We promise to fill you up real soon kitty, just a - little bit - more."
You nod unconsciously. You can't stop thinking about how badly you want to cum all over them. And fuck, Bokuto hasn't even touched you yet, and you crave it, you need him to humiliate you and reward you for how well you're behaving. There's still time to enjoy him.
"I can't take it anymore… need her now." Bokuto steps in front of you and from his position you can see what he wants to do, so you stick out your tongue and wait.
"Hah, did you see that? She's as desperate as we thought. Didn't you get enough of mine that now you want Bokkun's?" you look sideways at the blond, who chuckles and grabs you by the chin, moving you in his direction and ordering you. "Now, open up."
The next thing that happens, comes very quickly.
You don't lose eye contact with Atsumu as he drops a trickle of saliva into your mouth. Bokuto, too aroused by the scene with the blond, and by the two partners warning that they are close to cumming, points in the direction of your tits and without control over himself, regretting it, is the next to do it. The warmth of the fluid and how dirty it makes you feel, makes you come and brings you closer to orgasm, with no interest in alerting the men who, by the pressure on their cocks and your uncontrolled leakage, know what is going on.
"Ahh fuck, she's cumming, she's cumming! hah- so tight…" Hinata is next to follow you, letting his cum leak out of your pussy and drip onto it, leading Sakusa to hopelessly let himself go.
"Yeahh, i love it… so wet… you're all mine, you hear me? Fucking mine" Emptying himself completely as he admires how underneath his cock white liquid is still oozing out, possibly a mixture of all three.
You take a few seconds to breathe, still on top of Hinata, who smiles at you as she lies slumped on the bed. You smile back with what little energy you have left, and thinking about it, you miss feeling full again, and underappreciated, in some ways. You think about what you're going to do, but then you remember that you've come here to play, and that you have a side to you that they haven't known yet, and you have to put it into practice.
When Sakusa and Hinata have risen from the bed, you crawl to the end of it and kneel down, staring at them one by one and waiting for them to know what you want. Bokuto seems to be the only one who notices your intentions, which leads him to smile at you for it and approach you with the same.
"Coming for more?" You nod cradling yourself against his hand as he caresses your cheek. Bokuto and the rest can't stop devouring you with their eyes. It was no wonder; a mess covered in tears and semen, with teeth marks at your neck and finger marks on your buttocks. More than one couldn't help but take a breather to get back into bed again.
"We didn't think we had such a docile manager…" Atsumu's voice, sitting behind you, prompts you to lean back against his chest, letting out small gasps, satisfied with the result. You are ready for round two.
"We'll care you for a while longer, if that's what you want."
@planetmarz
A.N.: Okay, is this an open ending TO A SEQUEL? I don't want to deceive myself but, I would love to do a sequel. I'm not very satisfied with the result, cause I think I'm not very good narrating a situation, and I'm better at making short scenes, so… I'll have to see how much appreciation this short fic has and consider making a last and second part 🫡
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ravenelyx · 5 months
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Hello! Do you take requests? If so I have oke for you :)
It’s similar to the recent one about Sebastian hugging the reader. Could it be with Omi this time?
I love your writings, btw.
I absolutely can !!! And thank you so much ♡♡
Let me in. - Ominis Gaunt
Pairing: Ominis Gaunt x Fem!Reader
Words: 1k
Warnings: fluff, kissing, angst and comfort, Ominis is touch-starved, Ominis is insecure, neck kissing, fuck the Gaunt family all my homies hate the Gaunt family, we all know Omi's past, cuddling and snuggling, House is not specified, (implied) established relationship
Summary: Ominis Gaunt has never learned how to love. But he has you, and you're willing to teach him.
A/N: I hope you like this!! I followed a different tangent than Sebastian's.
Masterlist
you can find the whole fic here on ao3 as well
Sebastian's version
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He wishes love were easy.
But nothing had ever been easy in Ominis Gaunt's life.
When he opened his heart to her, he opened something deep. A Pandora box of sorrow and grief and everything he'd buried so deep he'd forgotten about it.
Unfortunately, his body never forgets. It shows when she takes his hand. It unleashes when she brushes his hair. That gnawing, scorching flame burning where her touch remains.
She asks him how he's doing, he doesn't answer, words trapped behind his teeth like in a prison of jelly and guilt. He thinks she doesn't really want to be bothered by his problems.
She takes his hand while walking, he moves it away, clutching it to his chest in an attempt to build back that armor she threatens to break every time.
"Ominis," she speaks quietly in the night, when he keeps her always at an arm's distance. "Please, come here."
He wants to cry.
"I don't know how."
The smell of her hair lingers on the pillow when she leaves, and he quietly brings it to him, burying his face in the softness of her girly perfume. Even then, he feels too much freedom; taking up a space that isn't his own. He turns his back to it.
She seems tired today.
"Ominis." Her voice is weary, sad. She's near the fireplace, brooding. He feels like he's done something wrong.
"What is it?"
He balks before approaching her, his voice coming out in a sycophantic squeak that makes his blood run cold. He is afraid: afraid she'll find him some day. That she'll offer her hand and he'll take it with no qualms, allowing her to pull him up, away from those doubts cramming his mind when she gets too close.
"Why do you never let me in?"
He's drowning.
Why? Why? The answer is immediate, pulled right from his brain by that tight awareness that has always been more of a curse than a blessing. Because Ominis Gaunt feels that he is phrogging in other people's existence until they get tired and throw him into the nearest garbage. Because he has never found a place where he could sit down, wind his legs and feel at peace. Because if one day someone finds him with his defenses down, when he hits the bottom of the bin headfirst, he will never forgive himself.
"I don't know how." His inveterate answer comes, drawing a sigh from her. She always drops the subject after, and he feels safe.
This time, she breaches the armor again, and he has got no time to glue it back.
"Come here."
His hands tremble when he follows, sitting down next to her. She opens her palm to him and he feels it on his leg.
"Take it."
Her fingers feel soft to the touch, slipping between his as if filling up a space in his heart he had missed, pushing back his doubts and making a home for itself. He holds her hand and runs his thumb on her knuckles.
"What does this mean?" He asks feebly.
"That you can do much more."
He feels the corner of his lips push down in a grimace. "I don't know h—"
"I'll show you."
Her movements are languid and elegant like a snake, and he feels like she might strangle him and cut his breath and leave him for dead. But he wants to keep holding her hand.
"What do I do?"
"Come here."
This time, he listens.
She lets him move first, wrap his arms around her, as if testing her shape. He runs his hands over her delicate ribs, then down to the soft curve of her waist, then around her; feels the weight in his arms, like she could crush him at any moment. But she doesn't.
She lets him pull her on him, giving him her body. His hands are shaking and he feels inadequate to hold her; to keep her safe and not let her fall.
"Just do what feels right," she whispers.
None of this feels right. But it feels comfortable, and it feels different, and it feels like his heart is slowing down and his weight is meeting the ground and pushing against it like he will never need to get up anymore.
And there are her lips. He feels them with his fingertips; the curve at the top, the soft flesh, the sticky texture of her lipstick. He brings his trembling mouth to hers for the first time and pulls away just as quickly.
"I'm sorry…" he almost cries again.
"Do it again."
He swallows and pushes his lips against hers. He doesn't have the courage to move and breathes against her mouth.
She giggles and his heart breaks, because of course he was doing it wrong. "I'm sorr—"
Her mouth moves against his, takes his bottom lip in a quick suckle and then frees it again. He holds his breath until he can't stay still anymore.
"How does that feel?" she asks.
"More…"
Something inside him cracks open at her taste, pushes and pulls and crushes him, and he holds on to her. It's all too much and it's all not enough. He licks his lips and tastes her lipstick and he wishes he could see her.
When she cups his cheek, he flinches.
"This feels…"
Horrible. Good. Terrifying. Perfect. Different.
"We can go slow," she says, and it's more than he could ask for. "But I'm here, and I'm yours."
He nods and attempts to find her, and he presses his forehead against her collarbone. She's warm there.
"Thank you," He's crying against her skin, and she skims her hand against his back.
He feels naked, a brush of cold hair against his chest where his defenses have cracked. She's pulling his armor down with a gentle touch, and he lets her until he hears it hit the ground loudly.
"You can relax now." He thinks he hears her say. Perhaps it was a dream. And when he hesitantly brushes his lips against her skin, he allows her in.
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kitasgloves · 5 months
Text
You're an Inarizaki graduate in a relationship with the SAKUSA KIYOOMI. You were close with the Miya bros, especially Atsumu, and friends with the entire Inarizaki volleyball club. You already had a longtime crush on Sakusa when you watched the practice match between Inarizaki and Itachiyama. You were forever grateful that Atsumu forced you to watch game because you wouldn't be able to have seen Sakusa.
You're working as PR in the MSBY Black Jackals and got reunited with Atsumu (unfortunately). He knows your big fat crush on Sakusa and tries to be your wingman. His plan? He gets you drunk in a party and forces you in a room alone with Sakusa. He claimed it would give you the enough courage to confess.
You confessed but you couldn't remember what Sakusa's reaction was. It ended up with Sakusa taking you to his place because you're incredibly drunk and unable to get home on your own. You woke up to the worst hungover since college and a shirtless Sakusa making breakfast calling you 'darling'.
The rest is history. You and Sakusa have been together for more than two years. Although you two seemed like the ideal couple, there has been frequent verbal fights lately. It mostly had something to do with conflicting schedules and a lot of dates cancelled. Sakusa was a busy athlete and your job as the PR didn't mix well with his hectic schedule.
"This is the fifth time that I have to cancel reservation, Omi!"
"Then just stop making reservations! You know how busy I am so don't get mad that I couldn't make up to our date!"
"You could've at least made an effort to! Or say sorry!"
"We've gone through this over and over again [Name] and I'm getting sick of it"
"So, what? You're sick of me?"
"Maybe I am!"
This argument was different from the previous. You were left stunned as Sakusa breathlessly glared at you, shattering your heart into smithereens. Immediately, your eyes felt wet as you turned around, grabbed your keys, phone, and wallet and stormed out of the apartment. You completely missed the sheer regret that erupted on Sakusa's face.
You called up Atsumu and asked to meet up at Onigiri Miya. When you arrived there and saw the blonde setter, you quickly went in for a hug and sobbed your poor heart out. Atsumu knew you had another fight with your boyfriend since you've been telling him about it for the past few days. It seemed like today, a line was crossed.
Sakusa tried reaching your phone but you have put your phone in airplane mode. Osamu kindly made you your favorite onigiri as you told them about the fight. Of course, the twins took over your side because they've known you for a very long time. You stayed over at Osamu's and had a sleepover with the Miya twins.
The next day, Sakusa was driving all the way to Osamu's place. He has found your whereabouts through his cousin Komori who he got from his teammate, Suna Rintaro. He sucked in a breath and knocked on the door. What he was not expecting was a very serious-faced Atsumu Miya answering the door.
"The hell are ya doin' here?"
"I need to pick up my girlfriend"
"She doesn't wanna be with ya right now"
"That's none of your business, Miya"
Atsumu gives Sakusa a humorless laugh and gives him the most intimidating glare that Sakusa has ever seen from him. Usually, the blonde setter is all smirks and smiles but seeing this death glare from him actually made Sakusa physically shiver.
"Ya made her cry all the way over here sayin' that yer sick of her! Do ya have any idea of the amount of effort she puts in scheduling a dinner fer the both of ya 'cuz she misses ya so much?"
Sakusa was officially speechless as he gulped. He rigidly stands there and gets his well-deserved scolding from Atsumu Miya of all people.
"[Name] means a lot to me 'cuz she's like a sister so if I ever catch her cry 'cuz of you again, I will personally beat yer ass then skin ya alive and give ya some bonus ass whoopin' from Osamu and the entire Inarizaki alumni"
Atsumu warned him. And Sakusa makes sure to keep that in mind. The blonde sighs and finally takes a step aside from the door.
"Go apologize to her and make up, Omi-kun"
Sakusa doesn't need to be told twice as he rushed inside the apartment, not bothering to take off his shoes and pounced at you in the kitchen. You just woke up but you were pleasantly surprised with your boyfriend profusely apologizing to you.
Osamu places a hand on his hip and looked at his twin. Atsumu was smiling as if he didn't just threatened Sakusa earlier.
"What did ya tell him?"
"Oh nothing, just gave him a little warnin' that's all"
Osamu knows Atsumu is a lying piece of shit.
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