#cringe™ character of the day
Note
haku yowane (vocaloid) is agender intersex juxera genderyottadere and a bi lesbian!! it uses they/it/shey/x/sh*/vae/pix pronouns, and pix has MDD, DPDR, executive dysfunction, BPD, traits of NPD, and OLD! X is alterhuman, aldernic, and otherkin, specifically being a goddess and a fallen angel! Sh*’s dating Akita Neru, a transmasc gendertsundere digigirl who’s fray- in her attraction to men, and allo- in her attraction to other genders! She’s also demisexual, aplspec, autospec, and grayromantic! She uses only she/her pronouns at the moment, but lets Haku use neos on her! She’s also alterhuman, specifically a princess and a computer program! (thank you for this blog, its really lovely :> )
:)
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The Bet - Brienne/Reader bookshop AU
Hi dears, in case you wanted some trashy, slightly angsty romance bookshop AU starring none other than the majestic Brienne of Tarth as well as yourself...well, look no further cause you're in the right place! It is with great pleasure that I present you
The Bet
Tags: Alternate Universe - Bookshop, Out of character, Angst with a happy ending, POV second person, Idiots in love, Mutual Pining, Misunderstanding, Panic Attacks, Hints of past violence, Swearing. Word count: 5423.
AO3 link in the title above.
"Hello?"
You did a double take when you lifted your eyes from the monitor. You didn't mean to, but the woman in front of you was not the kind of person that usually found her way to your tiny bookshop.
She was...well, she was imposing , to begin with: taller than you'd ever seen a woman be, with broad shoulders that the t-shirt she was wearing did nothing to hide...and she looked clearly out of her environment among the shelves, standing with her back ramrod straight and her hands clasped in front of her, shifting from foot to foot, a frown taking over her face the more and more you looked at her without saying anything. As if she was waiting for your reply...
Oh!
Right.
"Oh uhm sorry, yes? Uh hi, welcome! What brings you to our bookshop today?" You cringed at your own awkwardness, but her expression didn't change too much from her frown.
"I lost a bet."
"A...bet?" Well this was unexpected. Surely your little shop was not so scary that getting into it was a dare? And this woman in front of you looked as if she'd be afraid of very little. She looked more disgruntled than scared anyways, light eyebrows corrugating over those piercing, beautiful blue eyes, lips pressing together as her nostrils flared out. She looked like the type of woman who spends more time in a gym than in a bookshop but apart from that, you had no idea what kind of bet would bring her here. Not that you were complaining.
"Yes. I lost a bet and now I have to buy a book here. Surely you can provide me with one." She enunciated, as if she was talking to the dumbest person alive. You didn't care. Her accent was melting your insides into a pile of goo.
I'd like to provide you with my number , your mind dreamily suggested as a reply, but you squashed it ruthlessly down. Not every woman with muscles is interested in other women, you reminded yourself. And even if she were, it didn't follow that she would be interested in you , anyway - the woman was the definition of Out Of Your League, with her short blonde hair, her chiseled jaw, her strong arms crossed on her chest…and you had lost your train of thought once again.
"Hmmmm yes sure. Uhm not a fan of reading?" She bristled as if you had insulted her.
"Of course I read .” She scoffed “I make time to read daily. I simply don't waste my time with all of this..." she gestured around her, vaguely including the manga section and the horror shelves in her speech "...this fiction ." She spat the word as if it had offended her by its own existence.
Right.
If you had to be completely honest, if it had been anyone else insulting your beloved books, you'd have been all up in their faces. These weren't just books, they were your babies, your companions during the long days at work and your even longer sleepless nights, they were your best friends in a way no human ever could aspire to be. From the moment you had understood that in those pages lied countless stories, adventures you could partake in, emotions you had never felt, you were in love with reading already.
That's why you were working here, day after day, smiling up at the shelves filled to the brim, cursing the paperwork and cleaning and everything that kept you away from cracking open the newest release and losing yourself in its pages.
You loved your job because you loved books.
So anyone insulting your papery companions would be treated to your Cold Stare™ and Dismissive Attitude™.
And yet...you guessed this woman was clearly misguided in her dismissing all fiction with such a sneer. The fact that her sneer was so damn attractive didn't absolutely play any role in your sudden conciliatory attitude. Absolutely not. Nuh-huh. Not at all.
"Hello? Are you still there?"
Well, fuck. Daydreaming of a client when they are in front of you. Great way to appear professional, and to make a good first impression on a gorgeous first-time client.
"Huh. Yeah, uhm sorry, I was thinking of possible recommendations that would suit your needs. What are your general interests?" You tried to patch things up only to be once again met with her frown.
"That is a useless endeavor. I will not enjoy wasting my time reading it anyways. Just give me one."
"But you will read it?"
"Of course! I did give my word."
Her word . Who said that nowadays? Giving your word? That was the stuff of old, of knights, of epic tales of heroism, of... fiction .
Oh.
You might have the right book for this hard, formal, stunning woman.
You stood up, surprising her with your sudden movement, but you didn't notice the way her eyebrows shot up, nor the way her eyes followed you as you made your way to the book, rising to your tiptoes to reach it.
You presented it to her like a hunter presents their caught prey.
"This."
She gingerly caught it between her fingers, as if it could bite her, or worse, contaminate her with the debauchery of reading for pleasure.
"This?"
"You'll like it."
"Haven't you listened? I said I don't like fiction."
"I heard you. You didn't say you don't like it. You said you don't read it." You didn't even know where the confidence came from, but you were sure. This was the right book for her.
She seemed to be surprised by it. Surprised enough to give up her fight with a huff.
"I guess I might as well get this since you're so sure about it."
She started skimming the first pages as you rang it up for her, and you could see her frown slightly easing up.
You hid your smile, feeling it pulling at the corners of your mind as she absent-mindedly handed you her card, paid and wandered out the shop, her nose still in the book.
____
"So about that little bet we had, did you get the book?"
Brienne didn't like admitting she was wrong. She sure as shit wouldn't admit that to Jaime of all people. She wouldn't hear the end of it.
But no matter all of her misgivings, she was enjoying that book. The plot had captivated her against her will, and more than one time she had found herself up until the early morning hours glued to the pages, lost in the description of adventures that had never happened if not in the fantasy of the author.
Such a far cry from her usual dry, factual fare of nonfiction books. Boring , some would call them, practical , she’d counter. You see, Brienne was a practical woman and she happened to like that about herself. And if people found her boring, it was their fault, not her own.
"Yes, I did get that" she replied in a bored tone, hiding her excitement below her well-polished mask.
She thought of the excitement on your face as you got the idea of suggesting this book to her. Of how smug you had looked when handing her the volume.
So sure she'd like it. And the most shocking aspect of it all was the fact that she did.
And maybe, maybe in the privacy of her own mind she could admit to herself that she also thought of the way your shirt had risen as you reached for the book, exposing a sliver of your midriff as it did so. And the way your eyes had sparkled when you had handed her the novel, challenge and amusement and confidence mixing in your gaze.
She had liked that too, just like the book, and just like the book she had liked it almost against her better judgment.
________
"How did you do it?"
Your heart skipped a beat as she charged into the shop, the bell ringing behind her long after she had entered, a thunderous frown on her face, the copy of the book she had purchased from you tightly held in her slender yet strong fingers.
She had gorgeous hands too…some people were just blessed with beauty, you thought. And you were blessed with being able to see and talk to such beauty.
The smile that climbed to your face was not your usual customer service one, but a warmer one, a special one just for her.
"So, did you like it?"
She looked taken aback at your warmth, and you could see the faint beginning of a blush on her cheeks.
"I did, if you must know it!" She looked offended at the very thought. It was adorable.
"Oh I am so glad to hear that! The author is an emerging one, only has another one published, if you liked their style you might enjoy this too!"
"What for?"
"Why, as your next fiction book, of course. Isn't that why you came back?"
"I…maybe."
This time your smile got a definite hint of smugness in it.
"Are you going to fight me over this one too? Should I dare you to read this as well?"
"Listen here, don't get cocky. You just got lucky there. It won't happen again."
It did.
As a matter of fact it kept happening, and you fell into a sort of beautiful bookish routine. Depending on how long the book was and how busy she was, your favorite client would grace your shop with her presence once every couple of weeks or more, always putting up an offended front at having liked the fiction book you had suggested and yet always asking for another one.
Slowly but steadily she would start opening up about what she liked in them, allowing you to start collecting tidbits of information about her as well - she loved historical fiction, and fantasy too. She wasn't so keen on sci-fi and urban fantasy unless the plot was somehow worth it. She loved strong female main characters and complex character arcs.
During the day she was kept busy from her work (law enforcement, she told you on one occasion, and didn’t go in more detail, you wondered if she was just a regular cop or maybe something cooler), but she found time to read in the evenings ("Mornings are absolutely for working out, no way I am skipping that for a book. Even if it is a good one.” she had stated, as if it was the law, and you had nodded dumbly, once again mesmerized by the intensity of her gaze, even if you woke up with a book and read it during breakfast and on the commute to the shop and couldn’t think of a better way to start the day).
_______
“And I loved the world building in this one, the interaction between the characters, and I can't wait to read the second part and understand where these mechanical enemies are originating from!”
You looked up at her as she agitatedly waved her copy of Clockwork Boys in the air, trying to express how much she had enjoyed it. You found it hard to believe how different she was from the hard, reluctant person that had first set foot in your shop. Mesmerizing. Just as she was.
Suddenly you felt brave, braver than you'd ever thought you could be.
“In two weeks the author is going to be at our local book fair, if you'd like…maybe we could…go together?” you stumbled on your words a little and you could feel your cheeks getting hotter but that didn't change the fact that you had managed to ask your crush out!!
And she didn't say no! She looked a bit stunned for a second but then she ran her free hand through her hair (oh it looked so soft and silky, you wanted to bury your hands in it too).
“Sure! Is it going to be Tuesday in two weeks, right?”
“Y-yeah.” Had she just…?
“Cool, I have the day off anyways, so it works like a charm.” She… She…
While your brain was still reeling, unable to process the fact that she had said yes , she grabbed the stack of post-its and pen and started jotting down something.
You blinked at her, unsure of what to make of the string of numbers you were seeing until she straightened up and handed you the sticky note with a…was it a shy smile pulling her lips up? Her eyes had never looked so big before, of that you were sure.
You looked at the sticky note. It was a pink one, and you had to resist the childish urge to draw hearts all around the numbers. You just were so happy! You thought as you went to save it into your phone, only belatedly noticing a glaring tactical error on your side.
You still didn't know her name!
You felt like hitting your forehead on the desk. How was this even a thing? Who doesn't know their crush’s name? You, that's who. Too busy ogling her and inviting her to book fairs to remember to ask her her frickin name!
Hehe. But you did ask her out and she did say yes. That had to count for something, right?
You looked down at your phone and then typed up “ My Knight 🩷 ” in the name field, struggling to contain the giggle that threatened to escape your lips. In another world she would have totally been a proud knight, protecting the defenseless and fighting for justice, you were sure of it. And she would have looked gorgeous in armor.
Tomorrow, you told yourself. You'd text her to work things out tomorrow. Surely you could resist that long. The fair was ages away anyway. You could resist a handful of hours to avoid seeming desperate, surely you could.
You texted her that same night, of course.
But she did reply almost instantly, and you managed to start a conversation beyond the bare minimum details of your…was it a date? It had to be a date, right?
She told you about her dinner, and how she had already started on the sequel of the book she had just finished. You could almost feel her excitement through the message.
You fell asleep with your phone beside you on the pillow, dreaming of soft blonde hair and armor and book fair dates.
____________
"Are you the one who's been selling Brienne fiction?"
You were pretty sure you had never seen the man who had just entered your shop as if he owned it.
"I'm sorry?"
"You know, Brienne? Tall, blonde? Hates all fiction books except the ones you've been selling her?"
So that was your knight's name! And what a roundabout way to learn it! Just like in the best novels, it seemed that you had been spared the humiliation of asking her for her name after you’d known each other for months.
Brienne.
You liked the way it sounded.
Brienne.
It sounded like the name of a warrior, a strong, hard-headed and hard-working woman who'd stop at nothing to achieve her dreams. A knight.
“I am Jaime by the way, nice to meet you. So are you the one?" He offered you his hand, you took it mechanically, trying to answer his question without giving too much away. Your knight’s reading habits were none of this dude’s business,that’s for sure.
"I don't know if I am the only one. Maybe she just doesn't tell you about all the fiction she enjoys."
"Nice try to defend her honor. I see why she likes you."
She liked you?
Butterflies erupted in your stomach and it took all of your self-control to avoid bursting into a happy dance.
She liked you!! Shelikedyoushelikedyou.
She liked you.
She liked you.
She liked you !
The man in front of you kept talking, oblivious to the cheering going on within your brain.
"Listen, I know Brienne, okay? She's a lovely girl but I had to bet with her to make her unwind enough to consider reading something for pleasure."
“Well she probably didn't find the right book until now.”
“Or the right book dealer… so are you hers or not?”
"Maybe I am…But why do you want to know that?"
“Well if you were , I'd owe you a huge thanks and possibly a round of drinks, cause she's been in a downright good mood for the past months, and especially in the past week or so. As her partner, I spend most of the day with her, and believe me, I am beyond grateful for the change.”
Oh.
Her…
Oh.
Of course.
Of course she had a boyfriend. No, a partner. That's even more committed, right?You had been so stupid. Stupid and stupidly hopeful. So hopeful and you'd once again mistaken friendship for something else, just like you did so many times in the past.
You tried to swallow around that piece of news, you kept on a brave face while he still waffled about something or something else, but you had no idea what he was talking about.Nor did you care, all the joy that had taken over you had just as quickly dissolved, leaving a bitter aftertaste in your mouth.
You didn't remember him leaving, but you knew that you were quick to lock the door after him and close up shop.Only then, surrounded by your beloved books, you allowed yourself to break down and cry all of your tears.
____________
You didn't cancel on Brienne, even if a part of you wanted to do nothing but stay home and mope. Yet you were sure you'd regret it for the rest of your life if you didn't go.
And she had looked so happy when you had invited her. She probably didn't have a lot of female friends, you thought. When she talked of her hobbies, it had always been things that she did on her own. Working out, reading, jogging.
She was probably glad to have some company. Someone to talk to that she vibed with. That was that. It had always been that, and you reading more into it didn't change the harsh truth.
Your heart was beating faster when you pulled up to the parking lot of the venue, but it was more due to trepidation than happiness. You had been preparing yourself mentally for a bookish date with your crush, not for…an outing with a friend. You weren't sure how to behave now, your mind too busy going through every single interaction the two of you had had, dissecting each word, each smile, each playful joke at each other's expense. When did you start thinking you could have a chance? At what point had your hopes become delusions?
Your phone started buzzing as you got out of the car. “My Knight 🩷” appeared on the screen, and you had to swallow against a hard knot.
You know you should have changed the name. You knew her name now, and she most definitely wasn't your knight. And yet…you still hadn't.
With a sigh, you picked up, trying to be optimistic despite the dread pooling in your stomach. You could do this. Friends. You could hang out with your friend that just happened to be the hottest woman you'd ever seen. It was going to be okay.
_____
It was not okay.
It was anything but okay.
Who thought that Brienne was going to be the kind of straight girl that gets all touchy-feely with her female friends? She had hugged you when you two met up and you thought you would die on the spot, surrounded by her arms and her perfume and the happiness of her voice.
And then as you walked through the venue, weaving through the stands, checking out books (you couldn't remember a single one you'd seen, preoccupied as you were with your companion) her hand kept finding excuses to touch you, once on the shoulder to get your attention, once wrapping around your elbow to direct you to a certain stand, once simply splayed on your back as you discussed cover designs.
It was torture. Every time her warm hands touched you, your heart would start racing, still stubborn in its hopefulness. But then you’d remember that it was all in your head and your heart would painfully constrict because oh it would have been so nice if it had just been true.
By the time you sat down in the auditorium where the author panel was about to start, you were a jittering mess.
You kept replaying each interaction you had with Brienne, trying to rationally explain to your heart why, even if it might seem like she was coming onto you, she had a boyfriend and therefore it had to be her way of being friendly.
Yes, even when she placed her hand squarely on your knee as the authors started their introductions.
To be honest you weren't sure what had been said at the panel. You mechanically laughed when you felt others do the same, and studied Brienne’s profile out of the corner of your eye. She had a soft smile on her face. As if she was enjoying herself. As if there was nothing wrong with the way her hand was resting on your leg, absentmindedly stroking lazy patterns with her thumb. Driving you mad.
You were so engrossed in your thoughts and in her touch that you hadn't even noticed that the panel had ended, and most of the spectators had filed away, leaving the two of you alone in the auditorium.
You did notice Brienne shifting in her seat to turn towards you. Mainly because that caused her hand to climb slightly up your leg, putting it decidedly in the thigh area. Clearly an oversight on her part, but you could feel your breathing getting slightly quicker, and looking up to see her stunning eyes trained on you with laser-sharp focus didn't help you with that.
How unfair.
How terribly unfair for her to be so close, and yet unreachable.
How crushing that her hand, searing hot on your thigh, was not a promise of something more.
How sad that you'd never get to kiss those lips even if they were getting closer as Brienne leaned towards you…you could see her blonde lashes fluttering slightly, the small scar on her upper lip, her breath light on your face…
Suddenly she was too close.
Your heart jumped in your throat, and it felt like it had cut off all of your air supply.
There was a ringing in your ears, and your skin was crawling hot and cold at the same time.
You could see the little scar on her lip almost flickering, as your vision swam with black, and you knew without any doubt that you had to
GET OUT OF HERE!!
______
"So this is where you've been hiding." Brienne's voice was not warm anymore. You guiltily looked up at her from your spot on the bench. She wasn't smiling at you anymore and you wanted to hit yourself for that. It wasn't her fault that you had misunderstood all of her cues and kept seeing what your wishful thinking desired, and yet she had been the one to go through the pains of searching for you while you hid away to work your way down your panic attack.
She sat down beside you, a heavy sigh on her lips.
"I need to ask you something."
Oh. There it comes, you thought. The direct questioning that preceded the gentle let down. The 'I'm flattered but I don't feel the same' speech. As if you had never heard it before. Your heart remembered the pain as if it had been yesterday, and valiantly tried to brace itself for the inevitable rejection.
"Why?"
Huh? That…that was not what you expected her to start with, but she kept talking, and you had no choice but listen. "Why ask me out if you're so clearly uncomfortable with me? Is this some sick joke? It wasn't enough to prove me wrong over and over again? You wanted to humiliate me, too?"
You could only stare open-mouthed at Brienne as she rained down harsh words on you, anger and pain mixing on her face. She was so beautiful. Even when angry. She looked like a vengeful angel, the righteous hand of God, coming to punish you for daring to hope too much .
"I-I'm sorry." You tried to explain yourself, but she didn't let you, her voice hard and cutting and relentless.
" You are sorry ? Is that all you can say? That's not enough for me. Especially when it's clearly bullshit. Do you think that's the first time people make fun of me? That someone thinks that going out with Brienne The Beauty is the funniest prank on Earth? Did you do it for a laugh, hm? Didn't expect me to say yes when you asked?"
"No, actually I did not."
"You! The fucking nerv-"
"I didn't dare to hope you'd say yes because you're out of my league!"
A stunned silence met your words. You didn't know where the strength to interrupt her came from but you had to. You couldn't let her go on thinking you had asked her out to make fun of her or something. And once you started talking, you couldn't help yourself. The truth had to come out, so you pushed on: "Which clearly you are. But you said yes and I…Brienne, I am so sorry. I tend to live in my head and you were so nice to me and I thought…but clearly I shouldn't have. Thank goodness Jaime told me before I made a fool of myself. Which apparently I still did. Fuck. I am sorry for that, I promise you I am enjoying myself today and I am sorry I am awkward and I understand if you don't want to see me anymore after this."
"Jaime? What does he have to do with all of this? Did…did he set you up to do this?" You could hear the betrayal seeping in her voice and you couldn't bear it. If you couldn't have her, at least you could do your best not to have her break up with her boyfriend over a huge mess of a misunderstanding that you did all by yourself. By thinking you had a chance with this goddess.
Better if she hated you instead. Which she would do anyways. If she didn't already.
"No. Nono he's been nothing but friendly. He just dropped by the shop because he was curious about the books you've been reading."
"Then why did you bring him up?"
"I didn't know, okay? When I asked you to come here, I didn't know."
"What didn't you know?" Oh she wasn't making it easy on you, was she?
"I thought…I thought you might be interested in me - which I now realize is ridiculous. That's why I asked you out. I asked you and you said yes and you gave me your number and I thought it meant…I swear I didn't know! But then he told me and now I can't help but be awkward because I had thought this was a date and now it's not and I didn't want to ruin it for you which I guess I did anyways. I swear I didn't know when I asked you."
" Know what ? What did Jaime tell you?"
"That he's your…That you're his…That you two are together. Which makes sense, because you are so well assorted and you look perfect for each other and I am sure he can make you happy in ways that–"
"WHAT?" The roar that came out of Brienne's mouth was almost feral.
"What 'what'?" You babbled back. You looked worriedly at her shaking hands. You knew she was going to be angry at you once she found out about your silly crush. But you still hoped she wouldn't hit you or something. She didn't seem like she'd be the type to take out her anger on you but…but those hands looked like weapons, clenched as they were into tight fists.
"WHAT DID HE TELL YOU?"
You flinched away. You couldn't help it. The loud angry voice booming next to you, the hand shooting out towards your shoulder…you flinched away, your hands instinctively coming up to shield your face. Trying to make yourself as small as possible. Just as instinctively, apologies started dropping out of your mouth.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!"
Silence.
Well, not really silence but the soothing pitter-patter of rain on the tin roof above you.
But no words.
No more loud anger.
And no new pain blooming on your body.
You dared to open your eyes and peer beyond your hands.
Brienne…well, she was beautiful, as always. But she was also white as a sheet, her deep, blue, stunning eyes wide open and bright with unshed tears. Her whole face a mask of hurt as her gaze took in your shape, as far away from her as the small bench allowed you. Her hand was still in the air, but it had lost all the strength, it was just hanging, palm half-opened towards you as if to show you it was harmless. When she spoke, her voice was little more than a broken whisper.
"I…I wasn't going to hit you."
"I…huh…I'm sorry."
She sighed and straightened in her seat, tearing her eyes away from you to settle them on her hands, now clenched in her lap. Her back was once again ramrod straight. Just as she probably was , your mind cruelly reminded you.
"No. You have nothing to apologize for. I’m the one who’s sorry. I didn't mean to scare you, to make you think that I was…unsafe. I guess that with how I look, it's an easy assumption to make."
"Beautiful."
"I'm sorry?"
"You said 'with how I look' and that's beautiful. You're beautiful, Brienne. He's a really lucky man."
It wasn't her fault and you knew it. You couldn't blame her for this huge misunderstanding, you couldn't let her think that she or her appearance was to blame for your reactions.
You put your hand on top of hers, trying to get her eyes back on you, to show her how truthful you were. Her hands were so cold. She still didn't look at you.
"He…We huh we're not together together." Her whisper was so soft that you thought you had misheard.
You had to.
"I'm sorry?"
"Jaime and I are not together."
"You two…are not?"
"No! I don't know why he would…wait. What did he say? What were his words?"
"Huhhh I don't remember exactly. He said something about you being his partner." You tried to keep the accusation out of your voice. She didn't seem like the type to try to cheat on her partner, denying she was in a relationship at all. Gaslighting you for her own ends. And yet, you didn't dare to hope that…
"Oh for fuck's sake! Is this where all of this came from? He's my work partner . Not my romantic partner!"
"Your… oh . Fuck."
"Yes, fuck. And since we're on the subject, when you asked me, I thought it was going to be a date as well, that's why I gave you my number!! But then we were here and you kept avoiding me and you tensed up every time I touched you and when I tried to kiss you you just ran away and I thought…I don't know what I thought."
"Could you maybe…try that again?"
"Try what?"
"To kiss me. I promise I won't run away this time. Or have a panic attack."
"Just like that? That's not how it's done! The moment must be right and mmmmph–"
You didn't let her finish her sentence. You threw yourself at her, lips on lips, slightly smashing your noses together in your haste.
But neither of you cared, lips moving against each other, her hand tangling in the hair at the base of your neck, and both of yours coming up to cradle her face. You didn’t care, because unbeknownst to the other, each one of you had dreamed of this moment so many times, and yet now that it was happening it was better than any fantasy.
Comments are always welcome. If you want to read more of my fanfictions, here's my masterlist.
#dianneking writes#dianneking fanfiction#dragonmist fanfiction#brienne of tarth x reader#brienne x reader#brienne of tarth#brienne of tarth fanfiction#gwendoline christie#gwendoline christie fanfiction#got fanfiction#asoiaf
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so a few days ago, while looking for muzan images to use as reference, i found some ai generated ones from craiyon
so, feeling inspired, i decided to be silly and save this dude from ai hell and make him an actual oc! So behold: Hanagane Aoto
info and lore under read more :3
First name: 碧秋 (Aoto; 碧 meaning blue, 秋 meaning autumn)
Last name: 花金 (Hanagane; 花 meaning flower, 金 meaning metal/gold)
Age: 19
Gender: Genderfluid, AMAB
Pronouns: He/any
Height: 1.68m (5'6)
Ethnicity: Mixed Japanese (father) + Thai (mother)
Sexuality: Aroace
Breathing style + weapon: Iron breathing (derived from ice breathing, inspired by stone breathing) + double bladed kusarigama (think black star's weapon in soul eater)
Aoto is not an emotive person, and, despite his bluntness, a man of few words. Their face is completely neutral more often than not, and their voice flat and devoid of emotions. Not much is known of them by the Demon Slayer Corps, not even Kagaya himself could crack the young man's shell.
I usally don't give my kny ocs any ties to canon kny characters but for this one i decided to be la little Cringe™~ (/j) I decided to make Aoto Muzan's (non biological) son hehe :33 daddy issues + daddy with issues! They have a kinda complicated relationship where they don't really LOVE eachother, but Aoto sees Muzan as a father since he raised them. Muzan is very torn on how he views Aoto; on one hand they're a demon slayer, they're going against him by killing other demons, and they don't reveal anything about the corps, not to mention that they're human. But at the same time they don't talk about him to the corps, they're not aggressive towards Muzan, and they actively search for the blue spider lily.
#art#demon slayer oc#kny oc#pinkiegiu's ocs#i love making tags for my ocs <3#demon slayer#kny#demon slayer aoto#kny aoto#oc lore#oc lore dump
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Please do the firsts with semi eita🥺
A/N: oh yes I adore Semi! Also tagging @loveskitkats because one of your favs.
TAGS: firsts, first kiss, making out, first date, first time mentions and descriptions (undercut - not super detailed but there anyway), pre and post timeskip headcanons
CHARACTERS: Semi Eita
SEMI EITA
Pre timeskip Semi is more the guy to be asked out than do the asking out. Not in an 'he's got a bunch of fans clammering to do so, so he'll hvae his pick and say yes sort of way.' but more 'he's caught up doing his own thing so he doesn't think to ask people out' way.
He's a kind and caring person despite puting up a more indifferent front. Most of his time and effort goes into volleyball and his teammates. (despite them driving him a little nuts)
So you've got to have the Audacity™ to approach him, flirt and ask him out. And believe me he really finds that attractive. Loves a take charge in the moment, can take care of him back sort of person.
Needs someone to keep him on his toes and keep things interesting - someone a little unpredictable.
Timeskip Semi has a little more confidence in pursuing a romantic side of his life and is more of a flirt. He flirts with most people he finds attractive but he doesn't just ask anyone out. Waits to see if there's the right vibe - doesn't like just dating to date.
So let's say you asked him out. Your First Date would be something you planned during free time, likely during the weekend.
If you ask Semi what he would like to do he would be very diplomatic, letting you have control since you asked but voice 'something casual might be nice.' or offer up going to a food place.
Totally the kind of person to put your own preferences over his own, especially for the first date. To be honest, he's not really up to scratch on what the hot spots are for dates other than food places. Cafes right? That's where he would probably choose.
Ironically, with his teammates, if they were ever to get dates or romantic partners they would come to Semi for advice and he'd have perfect advice. Where to go, what to do, what to say, how to help them realise their feelings. But when it comes to him? Suddenly all that knowledge is lost. What knoweldge?
On the date itself he's a little jittery - though it's hard to tell unless you know him well. Taps his fingers a little on the table (moves to his thighs once he notices you staring at them). Tries hard not to keep flitting his eyes around and just focus on you but his mind is racing all over the place.
After you're on the date for awhile and ordered food he settles down and relaxes. He's never had trouble making converstion and this is no different. Manages to make you laugh effortlessly. Bonus points if you can do it back.
Post timeskip Semi is in the know. He's knows the places and it's effotless to woo you (even when he's not trying). Knows all the delicious dishes, things to recommend and is a little bit more relaxed.
Flirting comes naturally to him. Hes' nervous but plays it off smoothly. Knows how to keep his fingers occupied on his glass, feeling the condensation of his drink slide against them.
His first kiss is something that would happen after a few dates. He is patient. Patience itself. That and he's nervous as hell. He tried to do it once but was so aware of his hands shaking he bailed. Did an awkward laugh to brush it off as somethig else. Totally wasn't going in to kiss you.
Overthinks it for DAYS after that. Plans it out. Not just one plan of action to kiss you either. Plans out numerous scenarios so he's not caught off guard again. He's a cool guy. He wants to seem cool about this. Play it cool Semi.
All things go well until he's smacking his forehead against yours, cringing his nose a little as he goes in for that kiss. So much for the game plan.
You think this would dampen his resolve but its the oppostie. He takes this as his sign to just fuck everything and go for it.
Dives right in after the bumbling forehead smack and goes for your lips. It's a light kiss but with purpose. Then it's another and another.
Why didn't anyone tell him kissing felt this good? Never wants to do anything else.
Once you two are officially dating he'll find any excuse to take you somewhere private and kiss. Then it's making out. God he LOVEs making out.
He also doesn't want to be the only one initiating it to often though. That overthinking comes in. Doesn't want to come off super clingy even though he wants to permanently have his hands glued to your sides exploring. HELP HIM.
Loves a good casual arm slung around you too.
First time with Semi is born of these clingy, touching, wanting more moments.
It's not planned but it's something both of you likely have been thinking about for awhile. Each touch has been lingering longer, each kiss has been pushing deeper.
Then one day one someone asks 'can I touch you more.' There's a nod and clothes start to come off, piece by piece.
It's not a rushed process by any means but there' this sense of built of anticipation that sends a shiver up his spine.
Starts with the two of you lying beside each other, feeling each other out, exploring.
The main event - he has a thing for you being on top. Watching the way you move and grunt and push your forehead against his. He'll match your movements all the way.
All about giving and receiving after care. Cuddles and all.
#hq!!#haikyuu#haikyu x reader#semi eita#semi x reader#semi eita headcanons#semi eita hcs#semi scenario#semi eita imagine#semi haikyu#semi eita haikyu#semi eita hq#hq#hq headcanons#semi eita x reader#haikyuu x reader#haikyuu imagines
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Review of Blue Eye Samurai on Netflix
There are some spoiler-ish things below, but I think most of it is in the trailer, so I don't think I will ruin anything. I'll warn you during the most spoilery section, though the show makes the "twist" pretty obvious from the beginning.
Premise
Blue Eye Samurai is a Kill Bill-style revenge tale that takes place in 17th century Japan. The samurai is half white/half Japanese. The show states that no white folks were allowed in the country back then, so the samurai tries to conceal blue eyes with some sweet BluBlocker™ orange glasses. The Samurai is displeased to have white heritage and decides to try and kill all the "white devils" hiding in Japan.
Will some reactionaries complain there is a show all about someone trying to murder white people? I have no idea. But they're all bad white people, so I'm hoping it won't become a thing.
My Hot Takes
A few episodes meandered a bit, but I enjoyed the series as a whole quite a bit. If nothing else, the sword fights were epic and bloody. I would have watched it for that alone. And there is some gorgeous art direction where they really take advantage of the 2D styled, 3D animation. Plus, Japan is just really pretty. There is also a puppet show that was brilliantly mixed in with the story and the way they animated it was next level awesome.
They fell into cliche a few times. I think they were trying to do homages and tributes but ended up in Derivative Land and some of them felt a bit cringe.
They used "Battle Without Honor Or Humanity" which is that rousing instrumental song from Kill Bill and it was way too on the nose. Like, yes, this show is obviously a 1600s version of Kill Bill, but you're not supposed to make it that obvious.
Also, there was a Metallica song that equally made me roll my eyes and think, "That is badass" so I give them a pass on that one.
And there were a few sections where it felt like you were watching someone else play a video game. I don't know how else to describe it. As if the narrative melted away and suddenly a bunch of Prince of Persia obstacles appeared.
That said, the story was enjoyable, the actors were great, the characters were interesting, the animation was solid, and the fight choreography was top notch.
The nice thing about animation is you don't have to do any jump cuts during the action, so you get to really *see* the fights develop. Thankfully they didn't make use of a lot of impossible-in-real-life camera moves, so it all felt very grounded. As if these fights could actually be filmed in live-action. I suspect they may have even used motion capture or closely adhered to reference footage. Most of the non-fantastical choreography felt like something a stunt performer could actually do. They even had some legit Japanese samurai-style sword fighting moves before it got to the "John Wick with a katana" part of the show.
Back in the day, samurai duels were more akin to jousting than fencing and usually only lasted one or two moves. It can be pretty exciting as long as you build tension and anticipation. But if every sword fight in the show was like that, it would probably get boring. But it was still nice to see it toward the beginning.
So the quality was a bit roller coaster-y at times, but I think it was a solid first season. And I am really hopeful they get a chance to smooth things out in a second. But it is Netflix, soooooo...
As far as content warnings, there is a lot of blood and sex and nudity. Women are very subjegated and some of those depictions are rough. There are some brutal torture scenes. And I think there is implied rape, but it isn't made super clear.
The nudity was surprisingly balanced which felt refreshing. So get ready for boobies and floppy cartoon peens. All the genitals get screen time.
Quick aside about erotic scenes...
There has been recent discourse about nudity and sexy time in media. My biggest issue has always been that men's bodies are rarely shown aside from the patoot. It is never balanced and I always felt uncomfortable with that arrangement. I know movies are a bit stuck because the MPAA has decided dicks in a sexual context are an automatic NC-17. But even in newer HBO-type content where they do show penises, they are usually prosthetics. Hyper real fake dicks on top of real dicks that probably cost tens of thousands of dollars to develop and apply.
Like, the folks with boobs don't get expensive prosthetics. Only the most famous actresses can opt for a body double. For years, if an actress wasn't willing to get naked they would just say, "Well, I guess we'll just have to find another actress."
And now if a guy doesn't want to get naked, apparently the response is, "Don't worry, we'll raise Stan Winston from the dead so he can make you a perfect megadick."
Women are usually asked to do the brunt of the nudity and I have long felt that wasn't fair and it was exploitative whether intentional or not.
I just think if you are going to ask actors to be vulnerable, everyone should do it or no one should do it.
I also think we need to see more normal non-porn genitals. Like, you can't brag about your progressive all-inclusive nudity if you slap a giant fake wang on every time.
/end tangent
And now, the spoilery part...
The big twist, which is really only a big twist for a character in the show and not the audience, is that the Blue Eye Samurai was born a girl. To avoid capture and death they essentially hid in a different gender identity. And I'm trying to decide if this is a trans story or not.
Sometimes it felt like the show was bluntly saying, "She's a girl. See, she has boobs and no penis. And we make a big deal about her getting caught naked. It's like Mulan!"
But then the show kinda/sorta implies that while identifying as a man was a tactic at first, the Blue Eye Samurai came to feel much more comfortable as a man most of the time and only revealed their feminine attributes to a select few. They also had a binding scene which felt like intentional trans imagery.
Since there wasn't the same concept of trans-ness in 1600s Japan as we understand it in modern times, I'm having trouble determining if this is just an homage to Mulan that wasn't thought very deeply about, or if this is allegory exploring a trans identity.
It is unclear if the identity was chosen purely out of necessity or if there was more to it.
Was it like... they tried on a coat because it was cold, but then they really liked how it fit and made it an essential part of their wardrobe?
Or was it just pure pragmatism? If they don't wear the coat they will die from exposure.
I'm worried they wanted to stay close to that line where they could say it wasn't a trans story if that ended up being more convenient. I don't know. I'm fine with allegory and I really enjoyed how they did it with Nimona, but this felt more deliberately ambiguous and it frustrated me a bit. It would be nice if we could just have blatant trans stories that didn't need to hide in ambiguity to avoid controversy. But maybe there were more obvious things I missed and my confusion is unwarranted.
I also think an argument could be made for ol' Blue Eye being genderfluid. Actually genderfluid would make a lot of sense. Their masculine side is the stoic warrior and their feminine side is their vulnerability, love, and humanity—reserved only for those most trusted. And when the two blend and they are a warrior woman they get super horny. So the entire spectrum is there.
I'm sure there will be a long complicated video essay analyzing this gender dynamic.
/end of spoilery section
In any case, I think if you liked Kill Bill, this might be a show that interests you. It has much less cultural appropriation and blatant stereotyping. No Pussy Wagon, but there is a cool horse. And they did use an all East Asian voice cast, so that representation was cool. And the co-showrunner was Japanese, and I think that influence definitely made a difference.
I give Blue Eye Samurai 7.5 Froggies out of 10.
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Rhea for the "send me a character" w/ the "first impression, impression now, etc." ask game!
Cringefail pope my beloved💚
First impression
The days of 3H pre-release are long gone, but from what I remember I didn't think much of her beside her being another Mikoto archetype which I didn't have any interest in. (especially because this was back when I was still on Reddit and by extension the Fates Bad™ circlejerk)
Then I think I remember seeing a screenshot of an official tweet that went something like "fight/destroy the Church of Seiros in Fire Emblem Three Houses" (nevermind it happens in only one of the four routes and the most villainous one at that) so I was something like "welp. guess she's the villain of another Evil Religion™, whatever."
Impression now
fgdgdfgdfgdfgsdfgshfgifuhg
She's my favorite Fodlan character, something I never saw coming.
While I have my issues with how she's treated as a character (mainly being relegated to the red herring for Edelgard in Part 1 and the late Nabatean infodump only to then die in Part 2. You know, when she's not completely absent or treated as the scapedragon. In general she's treated with the "tell don't show" approach Fodlan writing loves) they are definitely mitigated by all the small details that make her so interesting. And while I find her lack of spotlight and moments where she shines at her best incredibly frustrating, I'll admit that digging beneath the surface and starting to see who she actually is as a person is quite fun in its own right.
She's a truly kindhearted, deeply flawed and quite cringe woman. Of course I love her.
Favorite moment
Funnily enough, her weed quest. Not just because the sheer concept of the pope indirectly giving weed to her students is hilarious, but because if you look closer you'll notice that every herb she gives seems to fit the specific students a bit too well to be a coincidence (for example Bernadetta's herb is said to give her the courage to strike a conversation, Marianne's gives her a more positive outlook on life and Ignatz's boosts his self-confidence).
This shows that while she feels unable to get close to the students on a deeper level, she's clearly paying enough attention to them to know the general things they struggle with and tries to secretly help them, and it's really sweet!
Idea for a story
I've been entertaining the idea of a Silver Snow rewrite (AKA a scenario where getting an A support with her changes the entire route instead of just the ending) where Rhea is rescued early and becomes the de-facto lord. Featuring character development where she finally starts to actually talk to the students and her loved ones, Dimitri in a secondary role because I think the dynamic between her and early-timeskip Dimitri, not to metion in a context where Edie's already dead, has some insane potential (also makes for a nice foil to CF).
Also changing from her requirement to survive from being A Rank with Byleth to being A rank with all of her support partners. AKA overcoming her fatal flaw allows her to not only survive, but live.
Basically her learning to stop compulsively keeping secrets, openly talk and get close to others again and rely on other people on a deeper level. You know, the good stuff!
Don't count on it ever actually getting written beyond a few posts though. I know my limits :(
Favorite relationship
Romantically with Catherine, platonically with Cyril!
Unpopular opinion
I mean, this is Rhea we're talking about.
Liking her to begin with and not treating her like she's responsible for everything wrong in Fodlan is already unpopular to begin with.
Also people severely overestimate the political power she actually has.
Favorite headcanon
As a joke headcanon: Rhea has been every single archbishop in the past as well, so to keep humanity from finding out she's a dragon she faked her death every few decades... in increasingly ridiculous ways.
It got to the point where the Seiros faithful believe the position of Archbishop is cursed, and whenever people act concerned about her because of it Rhea is grateful for it but at the same time is internally laughing her ass off.
#ask replies#loregoddess#fire emblem#fire emblem three houses#fe16#fe16 spoilers#rhea#my rambles#imagine: me being unsure of who i'll end up liking 3h beside being fond of bernie already#and there comes rhea with a steel chair
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I’m curious… what do you think are the sexiest gifs of Rob EVER? 😏 I’d love to see ‘em.
I apologize for my late answer but like a weirdo, I was just convinced that my choices would somehow be disappointing. 😅🙈 I just feel like most people are going to expect gifs of kissing scenes or skin but those aren't even the ones that make me the most feral. But I'll give it a shot. 😂
As always, under a read more for length but also for cringe worthy fangirling and NSFW thirst-talk.
Immediately, my first thought was this gif. When I say I adore this man's belly I fucking mean it. He's just so deliciously man-shaped. Tall and thick and soft in all the right places. I love a belly, lets me know that a person isn't too militant and allows themselves to indulge in life's pleasures. 😏😏 (I'm reading way too much into a belly but here we are.) Add in the fact that in this specific scene, Martin Evershed is being the ultimate soft, caring Dad™. He has every reason in the world to lose his shit on Sam but instead he actively chooses to be what she needs in that moment and it's just incredibly sexy because he is a whole ass Man™. I just wrote a fucking novel about this one gif but listen, there's a reason it's first that comes to mind.
The thumb in the mouth? 🙃
Speaking of Act On This, this one too. I'm not even sure if I can put my finger on exactly why this specific gif is one of my favorites. Perhaps because he's usually so smiley (which I adore) that a rare serious/stern look wrecks me. Another reason I want him cast as a villain. Just...yes, sir.
And on the flip side, these because he's just so soft again. I fucking love soft men, ones who don't seem to have that drive to constantly perform their own personal version of hyper-masculinity. (also, I'd suck a random dick off the street to get this in HQ)
I'm a simple creature and I like profiles, noses, and tits.
Like I said, I'm a simple creature and I am no better than any man.
When the right men manspread at the right time? Yes. Yes, that.
When Dad™ shows up to save the day? Get that man a beer and a blowjob.
And while I love it when a man is great with kids...I also think it's incredibly sexy when he's tired of their bullshit cause aren't we all sometimes? 😅
FUZZY GREY NECK? say no more. Also, I'd stand in a three hour long line to wait my turn to ride his thigh like he was the carousel at Disney World. I said what I said.
Hutch. Just Hutch. Everything about the character was sexy. And bless this t-shirt. The shoulders. The arms. The fuzzy neck. The nose. He could 100% talk me into sleeping in that creepy ass cabin and much like Phil, we'd also wake up naked and calling out to God.
Annnd because I feel like it's expected and it does deserve attention, this kiss with Papa E. Listen. Listen. So many fucking onscreen kisses go from 0 to 60 in .000005 seconds. Just immediate face-fucking right out the gate. And IDK about y'all but that shit just isn't enjoyable in real life. Don't assault my fucking face like a Dallas Cowboy's linebacker. 🙃 Ease into it. Warm up. Mr. Evershed will patiently take his time making you so anxiously desperate for more that when he finally does deepen that kiss your lips will be eagerly wet and ready...heh. 🙈
Anyway. 😳 I've been really good about not being thirsty on main anymore and this is still quite tame for me but I'm gonna stop now because this post could go on all night. 🫠
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hihi uhhm. sorry if this comes off as creepy but i scoured both your blogs for info on pop and lock but unless i suck at looking for stuff i didtnt find much. you should totes tell me more about them
that's not creepy at all don't worry!!! i've never really posted any oc lore publicly because i'm not sure if people care, and boy do i apologize you having to look through my sideblog because Wow Is There Nothing Important On It, but i'm BEYOND elated to answer any questions about them!!! literally thank you so much for asking, you made my day 😭
i have a looooot of stuff about them written down on places like google docs, a discord server i infodump in, and also In My Head so there's a HUGE amount of previously untapped info about them just around, but i'll stick to their main things for now :)
(i also have a toyhouse, but i never finished setting it up, so i'll also probably post more oc stuff on that when it's done)
pINK Lemonade Official Lore Post™ under the cut!
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POP:
Pop is an Octoling based on the Flapjack octopus. They are genderfluid, and thanks to the benefits of the cephalopod form, change their physical appearance regularly just for the hell of it. They vary between masc-leaning and femme-leaning, but usually look some flavor of GNC. (Their physical build remains the same, think of it like how the player characters in Splatoon change their gender and hairstyle. Pop just does that whenever they feel like it.)
They are fruitily charming, outgoing, unserious to a fault, and smug. Pop is a lot more sociable than Lock, often chatting people up or making friends at unexpected times. They are well aware of their charm, but make an effort to be the more likable of the two. They like to introduce themselves first, leading to many close relationships with a lot of people that otherwise would never have talked to them. However, when they dislike someone, they make it VERY known. They are unable to hide their distaste towards anyone they regard as too annoying. They can get aloof at times, but are generally a very peppy and easy-going person.
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LOCK:
Lock is an Inkling based on the Whiplash squid. He is the composer and instrumentalist of the duo, and is very talented on the keyboard.
He likes to put on an off-puttingly brooding, "cool guy" persona, but when you get to know him, it becomes clear he is often neurotic and overly sensitive. He can be very visibly depressed, though he tries to play off his inability to take care of himself as part of his uncaring attitude. He pushes people away instinctively, but gets very attached to the people who love him despite this. Unfortunately, he doesn't know how to healthily express his emotions and can get rather sulky and mean, leading his closest personal relationships to be... rather strained at times.
He also has a toxic and ultimately doomed relationship with Tide of Suit-Nami that both Shlubby and I have agreed is very fun to watch as it slowly burns. Sorry Lock, you're fated to lose the best boyfriend you'll ever have :')
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There's a lot more to both of their backstories, but for the sake of keeping things simple, here's a condensed version.
Lock was a trust fund baby pushed into idol culture that got shunted off to boarding school once he was deemed more trouble than he was worth by his parents. In a petulant attempt to be acknowledged by them, he regularly commits petty crimes and acts of vandalism, but is bailed out from afar every time to avoid his family name getting bad press. It's a real sore spot for him.
Pop had loving parents who encouraged them to explore their love for music, but after they got older and started posting their music to HueTube, they got relentlessly mocked for being cringe and were devastated. They went to boarding school in an attempt to escape their reputation and worked past their trauma by pouring it into their work and reclaiming their identity.
Pop and Lock were placed together as part of an idol internship program during their last year of school. Pop felt bad for Lock, and specifically requested him as means of lending a hand. Lock had previously avoided them for quite some time, but once they were forced to pair up he realized he had found his first genuine friend.
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and, special one-time deal, two extra characters! i literally have never posted (or. ahem. finished) any art of these two, but they fill out the gang behind the scenes and they occupy my brainspace just as much as pop and lock do :)
_________________________________________________________
MONA:
Mona is a halfmoon betta fish and handler-turned-posse-member of the group. She's an underpaid and overworked employee of the idol agency Pop and Lock are employed at, and was assigned to pINK Lemonade to keep them in check after they were involved in one too many incidents (read: PR nightmares)
She has a bit of a temper, as most bettas do, but over time has formed a real relationship with Pop and Lock and does not blow up at them as much as she does others. Their friendship has also helped her loosen up and not let her job consume her soul.
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CILAN:
Cilan is a calm, easygoing, tall inkling and the oldest of the four. He has long purple hair and seemingly permanently closed eyes. He's the group's resident eye-candy and secretary/flunky. There isn't a whole lot to his personality that I can say right now. He's just hot... sue me...
_________________________________________________________
Thank you so much for asking about my ocs!!
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i'm gonna post this here bcs initially i posted it to cf on instagram but frankly i have too many cfs who don't know i'm Disordered™ in this way LMAO
this isn't a super emotional vent & shouldn't have any triggers However it is a super annoyed one
i think i try too often to be "silly" scary & mean & Obviously i don't Actually Try to be either of those, i just like being annoying. i find i do this automatically with "friends" who aren't an ep — if everyone else leaves and i'm stuck with just an ep, i suddenly act like a normal person again LMAO
but anyways point is: in this act, i act really stupid on purpose. i act like a cartoon character. i'm a creature of Show✨. i often make subtle jokes abt murder & stuff that'd probably be seen as angsty teenager cringe. i tease people in a very well-meaning but annoying way. this is my persona that has been established in these circles. i want to make it clear, people do not get offended when i'm like this & when they do i make sure to ask about it & apologise bcs that's ~Healthy~ & at the end of the day they usually seem to really enjoy the way i act (some ppl actually seem to enjoy the attention from teasingly psychoanalysing them A Bit Too Much haha)
but SOMETIMES someone takes the act a bit too seriously?? thinking i'm actually Trying to be mean or threatening or whatevs??? & goes "ur gonna have to try harder than that!! it's not working!!!!" and i'm like okaaaayyyyy big boy
& then i actually do what they say & suddenly it hits a wound a bit too deep. just one single sentence.
this just happened 2 days ago & i get it but idk maybe don't get too proud when it's clear it's just fun&games (the same fun&games as Always) & then get shocked.
frankly, i will not feel bad
& i often don't even realise what is “too far” (it's either probably the autism or the low empathy + egocentrism = i wouldn't be hurt if someone said it to me, so why would others?) most times so maybe don't make it a competition bcz then my narc brain Will compete & then try to make me feel bad abt it
me when i'm in friend groups where i constantly intentionally do & say things so everyone thinks i'm stupid & then i act like i'm not for once ;;;
listen. i may not feel guilty for my actions. i may even think you're Unwise for making your ticks so obvious & then proceeding to act like they aren't. however i would greatly appreciate it if you didn't make it some competition that you can't be scared or offended when you very clearly Can Be, you just think you can't be by me bcs you think a cute little afab like wittle ole me is incapable. & then it all gets soooo awkward afterwards even when i try to apologise but they keep going on abt how it was Too Far and That Hurt & when they finally stop they're just awkwardly quiet until they leave
i can understand getting competitive like this & doing whatever necessary to "win" is not a healthy trait & is probably a result of x y & z npd stuff & yes i did feel very ugly when they started belittling me out of Nowhere but idkkk right now i'm just annoyedddd
usually if someone gets like that i have an ep w/ me who knows i'm a narc i can dm to tell them what i Wanted to say & they can laugh w me (sometimes just acting stupid with others but in the know with an ep makes the feeling go away without actually needing to risk doing anything toxic) but they weren't there this time </222
#npd vent#cluster b#cluster b things#npd#narcissistic personality disorder#bpd#borderline personality disorder#-> i dont have these but this might be a general cluster b shared experience kinda thing idk#hpd#histrionic personality disorder#aspd#antisocial personality disorder#long post#idk maybe
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wendy carter from dont starve is a ghostgender agender cassflux non-binary transmasc who uses they/them, he/him, and ⚘self pronouns. no further questioning
:)
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You've peaked my curiosity of this Jeb guy and his Frontiers review. I've long since sworn off watching or outright blocking Sonic content because of how much ass-kissing for the game and unnecessary Forces dunking the Sonic YT community still does. It's somewhat nice to hear the hype/praise for Frontiers is (maybe?) starting to ware off. To a point where I feel more confident about making my retcon fic. Can you post the video, please?
youtube
Now, sadly, I have to warn that he too indeed takes a few shots at Forces and Lost World. He thinks that Frontiers does a worse job at portraying Eggman as a threat than both of them, and of course he agrees that Tails in the '10s was written badly, so you can expect a jab at SONIC HELP ME™. (actually, bro even throws shade at '06 a few times - he admits he prefers that game to Frontiers, but he managed to sneak in a "more cringe than the Sonelise kiss" joke in 2024 💀)
If you are sick of these takes, then I understand if you want to avoid the video. But he genuinely makes some very solid arguments about how shallow the characters are, how everyone just repeats the character arcs they had in SA1, how absolutely boring the dialogues are in this already nothingburger of a story, how Eggman just isn't Eggman and his relationship with Sage is detrimental to both characters, and some of the jokes positively killed me, like his take on the NANANANANANANA scene 😂
Him being a massive SA2 fan affects the video in both ways: yes, he's exactly the kind of Adventure fan who thinks the '10s were a massive downgrade compared to the good ol' days when Sonic was cool... but considering that Frontiers does everything in its power to appeal specifically to that crowd, I'm happy that the dude wasn't fooled and saw it as the shallow, disingenous pandering that it is.
So I think the video is worth checking out. I doubt we'll ever find someone we will 100% agree with, but at this point, I can bear some tired take if I agree with the general point in spirit, and Jeb put very eloquently what we have been saying for more than a year now.
#sonic the hedgehog#sonic frontiers#tagging the game because i'd like this video to have more reach#it's not perfect but it's very well done
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OKAY I'M MAKING AN INTRO POST
my main is @isitsafetodrinktherainwater32 so if you see it in your notes... THAT'S ME
hello my name is joe i'm a lesbian and i use any pronouns except he (YES EVEN NEOS) this is my utdr sideblog where i post my silly drawings and i scream about ralsei my favorite marshmallow man
i follow from there so um. Watch Out
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i've made a lot of deltarune aus lol but the ones i post about a lot are triscript, my lightner ralsei au and soap seam au!!!!!!!!! ^_^ i like making aus because i like putting characters in silly outfits. i made triscript because i wanted to try and make a deltaswap-style thing, lightner ralsei because i wanted an excuse to draw susie and ralsei being siblings and soap seam just popped into my brain one day. WOOHOO!!!
i also have a few deltarune ocs but i don't post about them that much... except for tenna because she's fun to draw xD
i have also made a 100% not serious parody of just dance called just dodge which is basically deltarune's story of undertale. it's cringe on purpose so i think you should definitely read it teehee heehee
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about tags:
#my art is anything related to art that i make (mostly drawings but there's also a few Other Things 0_0)
#epic slideshows 300 is for my cool epic videos that i post
#rb is my reblogs tag, self explanatory
#srb are self reblogs.. sometimes i reblog from myself
#welcome back to me screaming is the me being annoying tag. if you want to read my thoughts... it's there
#asks for answers to asks that i get
#req for drawing requests from my darling followers
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i reblog everything that i like (and is utdr related because. this is an utdr blog lol) and i try to say interesting things in the tags but i'm not that good at compliments lol... i'm trying
sometimes i don't reply to comments unless i'm sure that you know what my main blog is because i still can't comment from my sideblog. so it would just look like a random person entering a conversation LOL
reblogs are very appreciated ^_^ likes are good too but reblogs help spread my art, so if you think my drawings are good then consider reblogging them! maybe even write something in the tags if you're feeling fancy. no pressure though! i just like reading tags °_°
SPAM LIKERS / REBLOGGERS VERY WELCOME!!! I LIKE IT WHEN PEOPLE GO THROUGH MY BLOG AND THINK MY DRAWINGS ARE FUNNY ^_^
my askbox is always open and you can ask me anything (but please be normal lol) OR send me drawing requests!!!!! i will reply to everything unless it makes me uncomfortable
i don't have a dni, i think the block button is more effective LOL but if you have an empty blog i'm going to treat you like a bot and block you. PLEASE put on a profile picture it could be an ms paint drawing of an onion and write something like "im a new user!! im a lurker" in your bio so that i know you're human it doesn't have to be personal information!!!!! just act human!!!!!!! please!!!!!!
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also...
to all spamton fans, i have very bad news for you. if you've ever wanted to see spamton in my artstyle you must know...
i have taken an oath to never draw spamton. dig through the #spamton haters anonymous tag to find out why...
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THAT'S BASICALLY IT!!!!!!!!!!! HAVE FUN SCROLLING THROUGH MY exponentially worse content™
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To clarify how nervewracking being online can be when you’re in this kind of job:
Like, we want to be enthusiastic about the texts we study! Great! I’d love to do nothing but write 100k words of fanfic about my favorite medieval Irish texts! ....but, especially with the less studied ones, that would tie it directly back to me because it isn’t like people wouldn’t be able to narrow it down.
And then you have the thoughts of “If my colleagues find this, will they think less of me? Will I become a laughingstock? Will they be able to see the divide between me as a genuine fan of this material VS me as a scholar?” Academia actually IS aware of fanfiction these days, yes, to the point where we’ve had a couple of papers look at some of the texts from the angle of transformative work, and a few of my colleagues + professors even know I do write it, but there are limits. If I write a fanfic featuring a particular character as queer and then write a paper about a queer interpretation of them, will I be judged as just wanting to force my interpretation of that character onto them because....I have a ship? I take some amount of personal pleasure in it? I enjoy the medieval texts that I have to read multiple times as stories alongside whatever cultural or literary value they have and can talk about them on both levels?
Every time I bring up that I’m writing a queer retelling, not a fanfic, a proper™ retelling™ of a medieval Irish text, people act like I’m writing gay porn. And there wouldn’t be anything wrong if I was! But that’s not what I’m writing. Now imagine that with the sometimes lurid connotations of fanfic. It’s fine for straight male scholars for decades to sexualize female characters or extensively analyze all the swords and spears that show up as phallic symbols, but god forbid you write content where there’s any hint of *enjoying* it if you aren’t a straight cis male.
Alright, let’s say I don’t write fic about the field, it’s gone, it’s out the window, I give up on it. If someone is super dedicated, they can still figure it out. What about any E Rated fic I write at all? Will they think less of me for that? Will they read it purely to find something to pick apart? What about 5 years down the line when I’m dealing with the job market? Will they take one look at my application and, even if they’re aren’t homophobic, decide that I just Don’t Fit The Image They Want to Convey? What about 10 years from down the line when I have students? What about 30-40 years down the line when I’m (hopefully) a senior scholar, or at least....okay, an older scholar? Will what I write be the subject of grad students snickering at conferences? “Professor X, when they were a grad student, wrote slash fiction!” I’ve seen grad students making fun of each other’s social media, this is something that is a legitimate risk. And this is me talking about the generic term “slash fanfic” -- this is not going into things like A/B/O fanfiction that, while they’re wildly popular, are often associated very much with a level of fandom cringe. This is not talking about sexual expression, which, tbh, should be protected anyway.
Plenty of people in my field adopt false names online for the sake of their privacy, as much as they can get, at least. Plenty of us hide or obscure our names. But the truth is that anything we do is a risk. And it shouldn’t be this way and of COURSE it’s biased against AFAB and queer academics (do you KNOW how many times I’ve been to a conference where the subject matter is just....Straight Male Writers™ writing poems or stories about medieval Irish texts that we then have to analyze because they’re Part of the Canon™ now? While I have to fear for my career for writing...oh wait, very comparatively mild queer content that generally acknowledges that women are people), it makes me furious every time I think of it because it is so *deeply* unfair to the point that I start to shake a little bit like a chihuahua whose rage has exceeded its body mass, but...I don’t believe any of us have delusions that these are the rules we’re playing by.
...you go into this sort of thing because you’re passionate about it and then you find that you have very few ways to express that passion.
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So, I've got a friend who shan't be named, who I've accidentally, through osmosis, infected with a hyperfixation on MLB.
But he also knows How shit the writing in Canon is, so he sent me to ask you which episodes to watch that ARE important to know to have a baseline idea on the characters since he does want to pay some respect to the og show and not accidentally Salt the characters.
[TL;DR. Friend wants to watch MLB but is afraid of the shit writing, which episodes would you reccomend? Also, he watched the movie If that helps.]
OH BOY
Hm. I think the main problem with this is that some of the best writing and worst writing is at the same time lmao. Doubly so when it comes to later seasons and Plot.
Okay let's take a moment to go through the episodes. Might break this into seasons.
Since you said they've absorbed by osmosis, I'm not going to make my reasonings spoiler-free.
Season 1:
You know what? I'm actually going to say 'watch all of Season 1'. It has its flaws for sure, but Season 1 is still legitimately good to me. All the episodes are kind of important because they set up the various characters.
Season 2:
The Collector - Establishes Gabriel = Hawkmoth. Interactions with Fu and getting more Lore.
Despair Bear - Sets up the beginnings of Chloé's redemption and why she's Like That™
Riposte - Kagami's introduction!
Dark Owl - This is 87% for the scene of them in the box. The absolute TENSION of of that scene is fucking BEAUTIFUL I love it so much you have no idea. Also brings in Damocles as 'The Owl'.
Glaciator - I'd put this one as a 'maybe' because mostly it's just for the introduction of the Ice Cream Man so you know what's happening later when he shows up.
Sapotis - First dual-Akuma, and also the first debut of Rena Rouge!
Gorizilla - Gabriel suspecting Adrien of being Chat plot! Also more lore tidbits regarding Emilie, as we see her in the movie 'Solitude'.
Captain Hardrock - Introduces Luka and Anarka! Also I just love this Akuma.
Zombizou - partly because zombie apocalypse can be fun and it hits all the tropes. But this establishes stuff for Chloé's redemption arc. Both in a 'why she's Like That™', showing the idea that someone can change, and also her actually being helpful to Ladybug and apologizing for the trouble she caused afterward.
Anansi - I love Nora, and this is the debut for Carapace!
Sandboy - Some good nightmare fuel, and lore on the Kwami
Reverser - Intro for Marc! Technically not important in the long run but I love them.
The Queen's Battle Trilogy(Style Queen, Queen Wasp, Malediktator) - CHLOE MY GIRL. Okay! Introduction of Audrey. Seeing Emilie in the basement for the first time. Gabriel temporarily giving up on being Hawkmoth because he actually gives a shit about Adrien. Chloé finding the Bee. 'The only thing exceptional about you, is your mother'. (unfortunately the 'encouraged to make up with your abuser' part). Chloé getting the Bee for real! YES.
Heroes' Day(Catalyst and Mayura) - Season finale! Scarlet Moth! The Team of Five! Mayura's first appearance and the reveal of Sentimonsters existing!
Season 3:
Backwarder - though it does have some heavy cringe with Marinette mixing up the deliveries, I love Marianne. So more lore with Fu, the introduction of Marianne who canonically was down to throw hands with Nazis.
Chameleon - Lila returns! Mari looks insane trying to prove she's a liar. Lila makes her threat and is willingly Akumatized. Adrien thinks things are just minor and gives unfortunate but understandable advice.
Silencer - Though the band was kinda mentioned in Captain Hardrock, this is where Kitty Section is really 'A Thing'. Bonus for really establishing Bob as a dick. Also the Akuma's power is cool and there's the sort-of-confession
Oblivio - neat Akuma. beautiful shenanigans with Marinette and Adrien not knowing who they are, but falling in love anyway and trying to figure out how to function. Bonus points for all the 'Super Penguino' metaphors.
Oni-Chan - Lila being a manipulator on many levels and Adrien quickly getting to 'you're on thin fucking ice' with her. Establishes Lila making her deal with Gabriel.
Miraculer - More of Chloé's redemption and Queen Bee! The first time the Heroes see Mayura out in the field I think? Queen Bee v Mayura! Ladybug officially tells Chloé she has to be benched because her identity is known, using this event as a basis of example.
Desperada - The chaos of Adrien trying to be Aspik, plus the debut of Viperion.
Startrain - crumbs for 'why Sabrina is Like That', Kaalki is great. Chloé doing great as a Hero even without her Miraculous and taking control in a crisis to save people! Debut of Pegasus. Also the comedy of not only the class being launched into space but Gabriel being so ???? about that happening, and so dramatic of 'oh no Adrien's on that train in space I must rely on my enemies succeeding for him to be safe!'
Kwamibuster - Little bit of lore, but mostly just the badass moments of Mari using all of the fucking Miraculous and how this was supposed to be something special lmao
Feast - SO MUCH FUCKING LORE. Like a bunch of Lore on the past users, the Guardians, what happened when Fu was a kid, etc. Plus the Guardian Temple coming back!
Ikari Gozen - Marinette and Kagami actually become friends. Debut of Ryuko!
Time Tagger - Bunnyx and all the nonsense she brings!
Party Crasher - this one is a maybe. It's chaotic as fuck, and has the debut of Roi Singe.
Chat Blanc - YEAH THIS. THIS IS A THING. LASER PISS ON THE MOON.
Felix - oh hey the boy! Mostly just establishing that he exists. The first time Gabriel and Emilie's wedding rings are established as important.
Ladybug - Lila's whole 'get Mari expelled' plan. Sentibug. Adrien making his own deal with Lila for Mari's safety.
Battle of the Miraculous (Heart Hunter and Miracle Queen) - YEAH THIS IS UNFORTUNATELY RELEVANT
Season 4:
Truth - Jagged is Luka's dad, comedy of "Truth: "what is Mari's secret?"/everyone: "She loves Adrien"." Lukanette breakup.
Lies - Mostly just for fairness, but you can gather 'adrigami break up for the same reasons lukanette did' if you only watched Lies.
Gang of Secrets - Mari is struggling. The Girlsquad wants to help. Mari gives in and tells Alya that she's Ladybug
Mr. Pigeon 72 - lore-wise this is the intro of the Charms. But tbh I just think everyone needs to see how fucking fantastic Alya was this episode
Furious Fu - Introduction of Su-Han. Tbh he so rarely shows up you can kinda skip this but if you /want/ to see him show up....
Sole Crusher - Zoé's first episode!
Guilttrip - Rose having some vague illness, fluff as everyone tries to love her so much. 'Girl that's a bootyhole' Sentimonster. Debut of Pigella!
Optigami - One of Gabriel's most fantastic plans, and it's something Nathalie thought of lmao. Genuinely good plan though. Tension is high. Unnerved by Sentinino
Sentibubbler - Gabriel going direct approach! Alya wrecking house while being held hostage!
Wishmaker - the chaos of everyone's wishes, and Viperion learning LB and CN's identities.
Hack-San -Scarabella my beloved!!!
Dearest Family - Kind of a 'maybe', but first glimpse of God Mode Tikki.
Gabriel Agreste - this was a trip, but mostly here for Felix finding out Gabriel is Shadowmoth(which.... he. He really didn't need to /confirm/ that. He should know. But I digress).
Shadowmoth's Final Attack(Risk and Strikeback) - Season finale! Felix being a FUCK and handing over all the Miraculous to Gabriel!
Season 5:
Honestly I could say to watch all of Season 5 for the exact opposite reason I said to watch all of Season 1 lmao. But if I have to condense the shitshow:
Evolution - Genuinely so fucking good! Alix darling!
Multiplication - not the best, but does really first establish both the tech to transfer the Miraculous Powers, and that Tomoe is working with Gabriel
Destruction - mostly not important, but kinda cool for LB's complicated af plan. But established Monarch getting hit with Cataclysm.
Jubilation - Into to Socqueline. The Alliance Rings are debuted to the public! Shows that the programs on said rings are designed to help Gabriel track down Ladybug, so if Mari ever wears one there's a risk. (downside is you gotta look at the cabbage patch babies and Chat attempting murder)
Passion - the Lovesquare has reversed and we are SUFFERING. Gabriel is a moron who Akumatized Nathalie knowing she wants to kill his ass. Nathalie as Safari is GREAT though
Illusion - establishes Nino's 'Resistance' idea of Civilians fighting back.
The Kwami's Choice(Transmission and Deflagration) - Tikki and Plagg try to let Mari and Adrien be happy with each other. Scarabella and Kitty Noire are on the scene! The Alliance tracker comes into play as Gabriel finds their identities! Near-victory as he takes them out, but luckily Plagg can think fast. Mari and Adrien return to their jobs as LB and CN.
Migration - Luka knowing the identites finally comes into play!
Derision - HEAR ME OUT. This episode fucking sucks, but in terms of fandom things you might want to see what this nonsense was. And how to divert it.
Adoration - Zoé confesses to Marinette, and Mari FINALLY confesses to Adrien. But Gabriel is a big old bag of DICK.
Emotion - Adrienette! The dance! Felix is finally here as Argos! Red Moon! Really establishing the Sentimonster stuff!
Confrontation - PISS WINDOW. Anger aside, Lila is finally caught!
Collusion - GOD fuck this but it's important to the plot for LB and CN to team up with the Akuma and run the mayor out of office.
Representation - Partly for the closest thing to Adrichat fighting Gabriel we'll get, mostly for Felix's play though.
The Final Day (Conformation and Recreation) - Our Season finale! Adrichat is left out of the fight entirely. Gabriel wins but also dies but still wins because he's remembered as a Hero. But hey at least we got cool fight scenes and Eldritch Kwami out of it!
Bonus:
Watch both the NY and Shanghai specials! They're fun and bring in various characters!
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Master post for my fics
hellou dear (possible?) readers,
my main fandom is the Metric System. Don't expect to find "inches, feet, miles" etc in my writing, it might not sound as kool, but fuck Imperialism.
Also, beware of lots of useless adjectives/adverbs and extremely detailed smut (don't ask me why, I don't know why, I'm trying to unpack that in therapy)
alright, here are the links to the Good Stuff™:
ObiKaka ❤️
Overtime Hours: link, WIP, updates on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, not 18+ as of now, but soon the spiciness will increase -> Obito is a new employee in the game developing company Konoha and he's already crushing hard on Kakashi, what a shame that he's an alpha too
How to Pick a Good Roommate: link, completed, 18+ -> Obito catches Kakashi fucking one day and he starts fumbling around with his new found sexuality and romantic feelings
Help Me Mr. Handsome Cop!: link, completed, 18+, with other stories as a continuation of the series -> detective Kakashi aks for help from Minato's underworld contact, Obito, but he's very hot and Kakashi is flustered
Jujutsu Kaisen
Where Loyalty Dies: link, oneshot, completed, M rated but not for sexual content, Ieiri Shoko centric -> Shoko works as an underground doctor for the Gojo mafia, and when Suguru appears bleeding on her doorstep, she should turn him in for Satoru, but she helps him instead
Being a multishiper is hard work: here are other ideas plaguing my existence and that I'm writing and will post eventually (not all encompassing list)
ObiKaka Cowboy Bebop AU: save a horse, ride a cowboy
Dark Hinata AU: the goody two shoes girl finally snaps (mood)
OT3 Obito x Kakashi x Rin: I decided I wanted to fix everything, so I just resurrected everyone
one day I hope to write stories centered on the usually forgotten female characters of Naruto, like Mei, Anko, Kurenai, Rin, Shizune etc etc etc very long list
give me other ideas, why not? it's not like my sleep schedule is healthy anyway
find my other profiles:
reddit -> u/SpaceAligator (wow, it's 2024 and you use reddit too and wants to talk to me over there? cringe)
ao3 -> Space__Alligator
discord -> space_alligator
MAL -> SpaceAlligator (do people even use this thing anymore? i just log in to add animes to my list? whatever)
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you: id like to read these fics with tiny text but i simply can't bc it's not accessible
them: DONT LIKE DONT READ THEN
A few days later
you: if you don't like this thing popping up a lot then distance urself from the fanfic side of things and focus on film discussion
them: HOW DARE YOU SAY "DONT LIKE DONT READ?"
(ur doing great btw and ur responses are so well done, i'm sorry you've got This ™ going on)
LMAO it’s all good I’ve kinda brought it on myself with my inability to keep my mouth shut
But yeah idk man this website has always been and will always be absolutely bonkers but sometimes you see a rancid ass take that ultimately boils down to “self insert fanfic is bad and cringe” (from someone who has written a handful of quite popular (and rightfully so!) self insert fanfics, I might add) and you just want to scream
And like, god forbid multiple things be true at once, too, I know nuance isn’t really allowed on this website. Everything has to be black or white because if we can’t deem it 100% bad or 100% good we have a meltdown like a bunch of kindergarteners. In this case, yes, reducing a complex character of color to a dominant Latino lover stereotype is bad, but fanfic is not inherently bad, and guess what! None of that is preventing you from discussing the complexities of that character. At all.
Anyway. I think the takeaway here is ultimately “don’t be an asshole and don’t complain about people enjoying media in a different way than you prefer to”
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