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#but yet it's my fave which makes no sense? lmao

kalliyen · 1 year

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Streamer Luck 🍀

Pairing: Wanderer x GN!Reader

Featuring: Wanderer (Genshin Impact)

Genre: Fluff, Modern AU

Summary: Streamer Wander drabbles lmao enjoy <33

Reader’s Pronouns: They/Them

Warning: wanderer (just brace yourself) bro is actually astronomically down bad, sorry id there’s any spelling or grammar mistakes i am delirious rn

Disclaimer: ⚠️ ONLY A WORK OF FICTION!

i. ‘wym you’re not single and rotting in a basement?’

Wanderer has been playing for hours on end, you could barely keep up with it.

He hasn’t come out of his room for hours and you were starting to get worried about his appetite, and his emotional well being.

Because you were such a good and doting partner, you decided to make Wanderer’s fave dish, and deliver it to his room.

Knocking on his door, he lets out a brief hum, signaling that it was good to come in. Careful not to get to close to the camera, not wanting to reveal yourself to his audience just yet.

Chat noticed the presence of another person in the room, and immediately bombarding Wanderer with questions like “who tf is that???” and “where did they spawn from???”

“Darling you’ve been streaming for 6 hours, take a break and eat first okay? Just call me when you need anything else.” You state, trying to resist giving him a peck on the lips.

Your boyfriend pauses his game, looks at you, then chat, and decides to pull your waist to his level to give you not one peck, but multiple.

Taken aback but not at all surprised from your boyfriend’s sudden show of affection, you lean into the kiss, missing the feel of his lips on yours.

Chat absolutely EXPLODES when they saw that, but Wanderer did not give two shits, and decided to kiss your hand, while deeply looking into your eyes

“Thanks Honey, I’ll take a break and eat this, thank you so much for looking out for me :)”

“No problem darl, just come out when I call you for dinner okay?” “Yes honey” And with that you leave the room, leaving Wanderer with him and his chat

He scans the messages, multiple times he sees “SO DOWN BAD LMAOO” and “did u kidnap them or something to take are of you”

A little irked at chat, he angrily replies “No I am NOT down bad (he is) and NO I did not kidnap them. They’re my partner. Why is that so hard to believe?”

ii. honey face reveal when?

Ever since you’ve made your existence known to Wanderer’s fan base they’ve been calling you Honey, mostly mocking him about the nickname he has for you. (they do find it cute tho fr)

They tell him to bring you into the stream more, saying that they missed your voice and your sweet personality, honestly they don’t give a fuck about him no more they just wanna see you

Wanderer gets annoyed (again, this man is always mad at his chat somehow), and says that he can’t force you to show yourself to them, which his chat respects.

“Also their sweetness and cuteness is for me only, not my fault that you guys are lonely and don’t have a partner. Imagine that, what a massive L” he says to his chat, and they start arguing with him again. (someone save his fan base)

iii. HONEY REVEALLL !!!!!

Seeing that your boyfriend’s fans really liked you, you decided to tell Wanderer that you’re finally comfortable with sharing your face to the internet, which he was really happy with. Because god he really wanted to show of the love of his life to the world, and smash it in their faces that only he could have you.

You suggest to him that you do a cute little baking stream together as your face reveal, and he couldn’t deny the adorable smile on your face while suggesting it to him, so of course he obliged.

While he was setting up the cameras and you were setting up the ingredients you felt really nervous, thoughts of ‘what if they don’t like me?’ plagued your mind, and Wanderer sensed your uneasy demeanor. He came up to you and gave you a kiss that meant ‘don’t be nervous honey, i’ll always be here for you.’

He turns the stream on and immediately people start to come in, surprised at the change of scenery.

‘Wanderer doesn’t live in his basement confirmed?!?!’ a TTS message read, and he gave the camera a glare

Chat immediately noticed you and started chanting “HONEY!” “OH MY GOD ITS HONEY FINALLY”

You gave a meek wave to the camera, still a bit nervous, but with Wanderer’s hand on your waist you knew you had nothing to worry about.

“Hello everyone,,,,I’m y/n, you probably know me as ‘honey’ and i’m…..wanderer’s partner” you say with small smile on your face, eyes turning into small slits

In conclusion, the stream was a success and chat was absolutely smitten with you.

bonus: iv. Honey takes over the channel 😱

Now that you’ve gotten more comfortable showing yourself on stream, you sometimes played games with Wanderer too, like co-op in this game called Genshin or other games that allowed two person players.

Sometimes, you even started streams yourself whenever you wanted to share something to his audience, or get advice from them when you start a new game.

Wanderer of course sees these streams and he just has the lovey dovey-est smile in the world, you swear you saw his eyes turn into hearts.

Damn, his streamer luck is insane.

#genshin #genshin impact #genshin crack #genshin fluff #genshin modern au #scaramouche #wanderer #kunikuzushi #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin headcanons #genshin drabbles #genshin x you #genshin scenarios #wanderer x reader #scaramouche x reader #kunikuzushi x reader #genshin angst #genshin imagines

5K notes · View notes

namazunomegami · 1 month

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Atonement

Pairing: Geto Suguru x gn!reader

Synopsis: How can you cleanse yourself from the sin that has been tainting you since your attempt to escape? The answer is easy: walk on barefoot for him, suffer some misery, risk your health for him, open yourself up for him and you can earn his forgiveness.

CW: canon compliant, established relationship, toxic and complicated dynamics, religious symbolism, porn with feelings, Geto is a manipulative ass how surprising, gaslighting, m!receiving oral, fingering, non-consensual edging, good old unprotected sex + creampie

WC: 5.3k

Credits: my lovely @notveryrussian who worked so hard to get this fic proofreaded. Ngl they deserve all the praise and respect because we lost literal pages from the already edited draft because windows is crap and they had to start over again. Take one big break darl, you deserve it 💕

Song rec: mythical creature by pregnant whale pain was my main inspiration during writing but i think tumblr dot com is not ready yet to listen to an unknown hungarian avantgarde metal band while reading porn lmao. Maybe i'll drop the acoustic version later.

A/N: Here is part 1 in case if you missed it. I think you need to know what happened to completely understand the buildup and have a general idea about their relationship. This fic is probably my fave I’ve written so far, a special lil brainchild of mine. These two are living in my mind rent free with all their lore and they'll never let me go.

Reblogs are greatly appreciated 💕

Minors don't interact unless you want me to stand outside your house at 3 am with a pitchfork

It was very hard to explain to your family what happened to you. The worry which they approached you with, especially Mimiko and Nanako just stirred a weird sense of guilt in your chest. The twins even offered to help you out with chores, eagerly telling you to rest, let your body heal. Your heart shattered to pieces in that moment, weeping endlessly with fat, salty tears. Your precious darling girls, so considerate of you, so caring, their hearts filled with everlasting gratitude. And you wanted to leave them. You felt like a piece of shit of a parental figure, obviously.

Days passed as if nothing had ever happened. Even in your private moments with Geto, the issue was never brought up. He took care of your wounds, of course, but your escape attempt wasn’t a topic of conversation at all. You swept it under the rug.

Which means it was only a question of time until he was going to wield it against you.

“Leave the scabs alone.” he reprimands you softly, dragging your wrist away from them. The hot water softened your scars, making them itchy, easy to pick away at them. But Geto is so thoughtful for looking after you like some kind of crazy mother hen, right? Even sitting in the tub behind you.

He takes hold of the edge, stepping out of the tub swiftly. The water suddenly drops around you, goosebumps dot your skin from the sudden touch of the moistened air as he hides that broad, sun-kissed form of his beneath a bathrobe. You ache for a bit of peace, a bit of me-time, but since the so-called “accident”, he just couldn’t stop himself from keeping an eye on you constantly.

Your hand dances along the surface of the water, bunching the bubbles together into various shapes, like they’re islands. Like you’re a young god, decorating the plane you’ve created. But his outstretched palm appearing in your vision disturbs your creative process.

“Come, I’ll take the stitches out.”

Compared to when your wound was sutured, cutting out the thread is a relatively quick process. Especially with his competency. The tweezer lifts and holds the knot, as he severs the thread with a pair of scissors and pulls it from your flesh before he moving on to the next. It’s uncomfortable, not in a way that it hurts, but it makes your skin crawl and your bones bend. An overall disgusting feeling. But when it’s over, it does feel better. And knowing him, you wonder if it’s purposeful or not.

“Must you make it painful?” you complain, thumb pressing down on the closed, marred skin. For the wrong reasons though, but you can freely complain.

“I didn’t intend to hurt you.” his voice is soft like silk, but not without a sharp edge in it, slowly unfurling, like the jaws of a venus flytrap. “I just wanted to teach you a lesson.”

You glare at him, your eyes piercing him like a dagger.

“Me? I wanted to teach you a lesson.”

This… was a bit too far, you must admit.

You storm out of the bathroom, like you could get away from the conversation.

“Go on, speak.” his words echo through the walls of the bedroom, making your movements halt immediately. You glance up at the window, faced with his reflection as he leans against the doorframe. “What should I learn from you? That you’re not afraid to run? To put your life in unnecessary danger?”

A long sigh leaves through your nostrils.

“If it comforts you, then yes, I realized that I had made a dumb decision.”

You don’t have to turn around to know he’s standing right behind you. Looming over you, shrouding you like an evil trickster spirit.

“I must admit I enjoyed your little attempt…” his palms are heavy on your shoulders, just like his words echoing close to shell of your ear. “Catching you, watching your resolves crumble, the raw terror plastered on your face…” the way his voice caresses you is just like the way he would hold a blade right against your throat, pressing down on the pulsing veins that could be cut open so easily. Like needles slowly being inserted into your ear canals. Eventually it softens, getting more serious and chiding. “But you did scare me. Have you ever thought about what would’ve happened if I didn’t go after you?”

You’d die, you would definitely die. Bleeding out amidst the leaves and grass, letting the frosty night bite you tense and weak. All alone in the dark.

Hold on…

You wouldn’t be injured if he hadn’t frightened you in the first place.

Did he just… no, it can’t be.

He slowly walks away from you, and you hear the bed creak under his weight. The choking feeling finally lifts from your throat. You turn towards one of the incense burners, already filled, it merely needs to be lit. But you do it slowly, just for the sake of appearing busy, to not feel obligated to carry on with the conversation.

But you should make peace with him before he does. He’ll make you face all of your mistakes and their consequences, if not outright making you suffer because of them. Rub all of them into your face until you have no choice but to plead for forgiveness.

It’s not easy, but you open your mouth. The scent of sandalwood lowers your guards, helping you be honest and brings forth the thoughts you’ve been trying to hide for a long time.

“Sometimes I wonder if we’re doing the right thing. And I wonder even more about that if we’ll fail before reaching our goal. Fail spectacularly. Because we want to do the impossible.”

“What is exactly the right thing? Being selfless? Forgetting all about our grudges and letting the world trample all over us? Or being selfish and crushing anyone under our feet to keep each other safe?”

Like an elastic band being strained for far too long, you snap. Luckily, the bronze lid of the incense burner holds out under your grasp.

“It’s too fucking late for moral arguments! Can’t you speak to me more directly for once? Instead of hiding behind your… carefully crafted scenarios that only prove your point.”

You should have avoided looking at him. At your serpent, who made you sin, who was cursed alongside you, your serpent who devoured your beloved Adam. You yearned for the remains, sitting in the bottomless pit of his stomach.

But you swore those remains spoke to you, through layers of flesh, scales, and deception. Soft and calm like a light summer breeze.

“Do you have doubts about me, darling? Are you giving up on me?”

The question breaks you, evaporating all of your anger and resentment in a flash. Devoid of any playful tone or hidden meanings, so raw that it takes hold of your heart and squeezes it so tight that it couldn’t possibly beat anymore.

You know how he twists the truth, striking right into the softest parts of you. He feeds you poison – yet you swallow it right down every single time.

“Faith has no zenith, my dear.” you answer, low and sweet, like you wanted to comfort him. The lid on the incense burner closes, giving you enough time to build up the courage to approach him. You weave your words carefully, in such fashion that it can be interpreted in multiple ways. If he switched just one little word, he’d immediately gain more insight into what’s really been weighing on your heart. “There’s no such peak we can reach on which we can stagnate forever. Faith sometimes wavers, sometimes we question our beliefs. Sometimes we’re unsure if our prayers are heard.” you get down on your knees before him, taking his hand into yours, giving him a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “But I do want to have faith in you.”

His features visibly soften. Heavy lids close in relief, and you feel his thumb brushing along your knuckles.

This is your chance! Go on, there’s no time more perfect than this to try to convince him.

“We should really get away from the temple.” you start with an almost resigned sigh, but your excitement soon starts to show. “Just for a few days. Manami will handle the followers while we leave for the countryside, or an island. We can bring the girls even.”

A faint glimmer in his eyes tells you his answer is going to disappoint you.

“They don’t know about the girls, but they certainly know about you.” he reminds you sternly. “The higher ups want us dead and the last time I offered to protect someone, they ended up getting killed.”

His voice is faint, almost shaky. He rarely talks about the death of Riko. And if he ever brings her up in a conversation, you know he means it.

The heavy lid above his eyes drops, violet irises hiding behind his lashes, averted from you. The words coming out of him are barely above a whisper, like his lips are made from lead, like forming the words is a tiring task because they’re so heavy, and filled with something violently torturing him.

“This is a risk I’m not willing to take again. Not even for you. Especially for you.”

You feel something pooling on your waterline. Translucent pearls of tears appear so involuntarily when you see him like this. Sometimes you do want to hurt him, but when you see him in pain, it torments you even worse.

“I’m not asking you to take risks for me. I never did. But you should take some for you. You could use some respite.” you lace your fingers with his. It brings you a strange kind of comfort how your hand just loses itself in his, but it’s yours that looks more lively and powerful. Like it’s you what keeps him together. As if without you he would shatter into pieces. “You take on an awful lot of responsibilities, I think sometimes more than you’re capable of handling.”

Affection sweeps through his features as he caresses your head, from the roots of your strands to the thick bone of your jaw. A lonely thumb brushing along from your cheekbone to the lobe of your ear. And there’s nothing you can do, only stare at him, wide-eyed with reverence, like he’s an ethereal being.

“This is not your cross to bear.”

He wanted to ease your concerns, but you’re much more stubborn than that. You won’t stand there, at a safe distance, watching him drag himself to his Calvary, whipped and crowned with thorns. You’ll push through the crowd, smash them to bits just to reach him and offer your veil to wipe his face. A thousand times, as many times as he needs.

“Of course it is, what do you expect from me? Unlike…” No, don’t say names, do not compare yourself to certain figures in your past and the way they treated him. “I’m worried about you, for no other reason than I genuinely care about you. That’s why I want you to put our plans to aside - let’s unwind a little, recharge. Before all of this drives us insane.”

He deliberately avoids answering, your concern grows and grows like vicious vine. Is this too much to ask for? A small moment of normalcy can’t be granted to you? What are the two of you really? Idols of worship, if not gods at this point because your sheep do regard you as such. But can’t gods long for a visit amongst mortals? Can’t they shed their divine status? You could, but maybe, before he’d let you leave, he’ll feed you pomegranate seeds.

Would you eat them again? Of course you would. Even if you fight and snarl a little beforehand. Because love is the death of duty, and of a peaceful mind, of comprehensive decisions. Love is so mystified, shrouded in the illusion of an immortalized existence, just like death. Love is, indeed, death.

Your palms cup his face, his skin radiates warmth through you. The warmth of the evening sun that makes the sky bleed with the prettiest colors you can imagine. Your touch slowly encourages him to look into your eyes, finding a strange kind of determination and care mixed with your obvious worry. A Magdalene dwells within your gaze, who already washed her prophet’s feet with tears and dried them with her hair before he starts his last journey to Golgotha.

“I told you a million times, if you fall too deep into your misery, when you feel like you can’t come back to the surface on your own, let me know, so I can pull you out. Or let me know so I can go after you. And we’ll drown together.”

All those little pacts and vows you made during the years echo through you. Even the first one, the most ancient of them all, when it was still easy to hide your concerns behind your techniques.

I’ll keep an eye on you.

It’ll keep an eye on you.

You lean closer, foreheads and the tips of your noses touching. Eyes closing in almost perfect synchronicity.

“Promise me, Suguru. Promise me again.”

You wait and wait, until his warm breath brushes your skin like fine silk, like a feather.

“I promise.”

You sigh in relief. It hurts, it hurts so much. There’s so much place in your heart for him to dwell in. He owns it and he won’t give it back. Ever.

You only wanted a chaste kiss, but a special type of hunger wakes deep below your navel. You taste his words, you swallow them down, nipping them from his lips. You look for the rest of them, his thoughts that hadn’t been formed into words yet, the rest of the sentence, you search for it with your tongue inside his mouth.

You grab onto the sheets, trying to push yourself up. Like you could overpower him, like you could battle against him. To have him laid out on the mattress, defeated. But he stops your advances with a palm resting on your shoulder, gently pushing you away.

“You’re not healed yet.” he whispers, truly concerned.

“Then I’ll be on top, I don’t care.” you oppose breathily, your fingers trying to pry his robe open.

“The cut on your hand could re-open if we’re not careful.”

Oh, how you adore him when he’s so tender with you, but now, this is the last thing you want. You want to bare your teeth and go right for the throat.

“Then you’ll stitch me up again.” There’s a playful edge in your voice, and you kiss him again with the same curve of a smile while he lets you crawl on top of him.

And he smiles against you too, delighted by your eagerness. You, trying to eat him up, digest him - he’s just enjoying you and the feast you’re having. Taking everything from you. He only wants to capture you, to cage you in his hold. He’s kneading your flesh leisurely and humming into your mouth contently, almost lazily.

In the crooks of his body, you find your religion.

The sharp line of his jaw, the tendons of his neck, the hollow caverns around his collarbone. But your mouth carefully avoids the scars slashing through his chest, after all those years, it still pains him when the lightly coloured, textured skin gets touched. As if these lips of yours and your aimlessly trailing fingers were the same blades, penetrating the flesh again and again.

There’s not a morsel of him that you weren’t intimately familiar with. In a way that rivals how much you know about yourself. And what you know even better is that how can you venerate them, dote on them, adore, and idolize with such devotion you could anger all deities created by man and make them scream blasphemy on you.

You take his cock in your hand, teasingly working your palms around him. Pumping it, stroking your thumb along the underside to make his breath hitch. His dick grows beneath your hands, getting harder and heavier. The first beads of precum get smeared along the length by your skillful fingers.

“You know you don’t have to- “but you cut him off while settling between his legs.

“Just relax and let me do all the work.” your response comes out a bit more deadpan than planned. “You deserve it once in a while.”

And with that, you wrap your lips around him, enveloping him in warmth and wetness, your tongue slowly swirling around the head. His thighs twitch, more precum oozes into your waiting mouth as the muscle between your teeth works eagerly. You give him a few, gentle sucks, slurping up the mixture of your own saliva and his arousal. Between ragged breaths, he reminds you to breathe through your nose as you take more and more of his length. You relax your jaw, your fingers tense around the base of his cock and you’re trying as hard as you can to defeat the urge to gag. When you fit all of him inside your mouth, you empty your lungs and give him a harder suck, hard enough to make you cheeks hollow and his chest heave. As your free hand is occupied with kneading his balls between your fingers and knuckles, a moan bursts out of him.

The sound boosts your confidence, filling you with a wicked kind of playfulness. The kind of wicked that makes you pull back your tongue a little, as to not keep your teeth hidden. You drag them along his sensitive, pulsing underside, balancing the pressure between pleasure and pain. Like you could prove to him that you’re ready to bite back, that this is the only moment when he can’t control you, that he shouldn’t underestimate you.

And just as if he could read your thoughts, his hand goes for your head, fingers getting lost between your strands. But he’s not as cruel as to push you down on him, instead he guides you, increases the rhythm that you’re working with. Steady and firm, but not too fast. You earn yourself his praises, soft curses pitched higher than his normal voice.

This is what real worship looks like.

When you feel the muscles in his thighs and stomach tensing up, you stop. You emerge from the space between his legs, wiping your lips clean and admiring your work. All that flushed skin blooming in pink on his chest and face. You move, trying to get into a new position, settling your calves right next to hips. You start aligning yourself with his cock to finally start grinding on him.

He sits up and traps you with an arm coiling around your waist.

“Since when were you so reckless?”

His hand creeps around the apex of your thighs. A finger barely brushes along your slit. By adding another digit, he spreads your folds, finding hot, smooth, slippery flesh.

“I would’ve prepped myself.” that’s all you can say in your defense.

Fingertips circle your hole, applying a bit of pressure, checking how much you’ve loosened up. He invades you slowly as your lungs empty, the hardened skin on his fingers stroking and massaging your sweet spots before he starts working you open.

You wrap your arms around him, slowly undoing his bun to have something to grab onto as you jolt, as your bones melt, as your brows furrow in bliss. The moans coming from you are breathy and tender, and you hide them in his strands. He twists his fingers inside you, stretching your warm muscles further, making your back arch and you press your hardened nipples to his chest. Your essence engulfs his knuckles, clear and sticky like honey.

The heel of his palm settles right against your clit and you shamelessly grind on it. Your mewls pass over his ears as he’s nuzzling into the crook of your neck, nipping at the skin of a faint scar. But you resist giving in, you stop him, telling him that’s enough, but in reality you just want your control back. Take back the lead and revel in it.

And somehow he obeys, laying back into the sheets.

You slip out of your robe, showing yourself fully. The bruises on your skin can finally bathe in the dim lamplight, painting the complexion of your sides, shoulders, and upper arm in different shades of blue and purple, like paint on bare canvas. Like the night sky carrying storm clouds, like you’re rotting, decomposing. You find a twisted, perverted joy in the fact that he must be seeing them for the whole time.

“Slowly, slowly.” he murmurs softly as you’re pushing the head of his cock inside you. “There’s no need to rush.” Trimmed nails trail up and down from the flesh of your thighs to your bruised sides. Tender and slow like a ghost, goosebumps pepper your skin from the tickling feeling. “I’m already yours.” He purrs and your heart flutters.

And there’s so, so much pride in you that only you can render him to this state. Too powerful for the world to bear him, capable to burn this plane to ruins, defying the barriers between a mortal and a god - or something way worse than that. Maybe you should receive twice the respect from your herd, for being the only person who can enslave him in this way, that only you can have this sort of power over him. Only you can overthrow him. Because you’re just too dear to him, too close to his burning heart.

Maybe it’s your time to warn him. Tame him like the monster he is.

You move with your own rhythm. His hand caged between your fingers and pressed down against the sheets. You give him no other choice but to venerate you back and he does, with pleased, low rumbles coming from his throat. Only a singular hand is allowed to roam your form freely. On your back tracing the shallow line where your spine lies beneath skin and flesh, wandering towards the inner part of your thighs, then to your stomach and chest. And you reward him with a prayer of your own, encapsulated in deep, long sighs.

But you’re too trusting of him. You let your guard down too easily.

You’re holding onto his kneecaps, leaning towards them a little, allowing every inch of you to be seen. You want to give him a show, but your knees are too worn and tired.

He takes hold of your hips, helping you guide yourself along his length. His pelvis moves along with you in synced rhythm. Your teeth are pressing down on the soft skin of your lips, but you can’t keep your whimpers in. You’re getting close, your muscles and nerves are st tight and pulsing, your walls are pressing down on his length. His name mindlessly slips out of your mouth.

Maybe you can say you love him before you shatter.

But his fingers clench around you, strong and firm, stopping your movements. Lifting your hips up so high that his cock is barely inside, robbing you from your incoming orgasm.

You’re shocked, eyes staring into the nothingness, open wide. Your stomach drops, stirring up all kinds of feelings dwelling in you. A chill races down your vertebrae as you glance down at him.

“Suguru..?” Your voice is weak, shaky.

Fear courses through your being, primordial and all-consuming.

And when he speaks to you it’s all dark, shrouded in malevolence.

“You forgot one thing, darling. After I brought you back from the forest.”

No, no, no, he can’t do this to you! He can’t hold your orgasm hostage for the sake of toying with you! You should puncture his flesh your nails, scratch him, tear him up, but you can only grit your teeth. Your features twist from bliss to rage.

“You…” boiling anger swims through your voice. It’s like it’s not even your voice - more like a hiss, a growl.

There’s an undecipherable mixture of pity and amusement in his eyes. He twitches inside you but you’re too upset to notice.

“Apologize.” he sneers - almost commands.

His words cause anger to bubble up in you.

“Oh, you piece of shit…!” you seethe, but sob and moan when he slams you back on his cock, stretching you around his length again. Wanting to quench your rage with the sensation you crave the most right now.

“I hope, for your sake, I don’t have to repeat myself.”

It doesn’t matter how much you try to squirm, fuss and wriggle, he forces you still. His behaviour frustrates you to no end when you’re so desperate for a bit of friction, the horribly hollow and burning feeling of your lost peak torturing you seemingly endlessly. To the point where you’re too tired to put up a fight, when you’re teetering on the edge of breaking. You know you must swallow your pride, you have let him have it his way.

“I… I’m sorry.” you apologize meekly, teary-eyed, your voice a pathetic mewl. He finally starts lifting you up and easing you down, building you up slowly. But it’s not enough. You need more but he won’t give it to you just yet.

“You do?” he asks you in a way that it cuts deep into your marrow. It’s not even close to a loving tease – no, he’s outright mocking you.

Vicious bastard. You should grab his throat and squeeze the air out of him.

“Yes, I do!” you cry out without thinking. “I’m sorry for running away from you.” you push the words out through your whimpers. He increases the pace, making you yelp and shake, you end up closing your eyes reflexively. He robbed you from the sensation for so long that you became sensitive, it’s easier to make a mess out of you. Your face is red with shame, so much so you can’t look him in the eyes. The humiliation is like an invisible rope tightening around your neck.

“Promise you’ll never do that to me again.”

He pushes your hips further along his length this time, shifting you a bit towards his thighs. Creating a perfect angle, he uncovers a sweet spot inside you that makes you almost incapable of forming coherent words. And he eats the sight right up.

“…I promise… I promise...” you manage to get your answer out in the form of a choked hiccup. Your vision blurs. Everything is too intense for you to handle. You swear that the very shape of you could dissolve at any given moment.

Faith is desperate. Gods are hungry for despair. So they deliberately make you suffer and only then reveal themselves to you.

His fingers dig into your waist so hard it burns. You feel the world shift with you and then you collide with the sheets. Your bruised back ripples with pain. You’re unsure if he did it out of spite or not. You don’t know if he’ll completely shatter your dignity, or if he’s fine with just enforcing the feeling that you can never be above him, that you can never defeat him.

His weight on top of you is overwhelming. The midnight dark locks of his hair spread around you like spilled ink. And through the thick fog of your mind, too far gone in twisted, masochistic pleasure, you lock your legs around his waist. You don’t want him to go away. You might as well cease to exist if he does.

“And what do we say when we apologize?”

The soft plea coming from you is more instinctual rather than deliberate.

“Forgive me.”

You ache for him to move, you’re starved for the incoming high. Like a ravenous beast, all devouring. When he finally gives it to you, his thrusts make you feel possessed, make your back arch, your head falls back into the pillow as if you were offering your neck to him (maybe one day he won’t be able to resist the urge and will bite down on the jugular, through your trachea, putting you out of your misery) - you don’t dare to beg for anything else.

Maybe just for a little blood. A mark he can wear, just like you wear your bruises. Your nails somehow acquire a will of their own, your scratches have him excited and pleased.

His fingers meander around your jaw, gently coaxing you into letting him guide your gazes to meet again.

He’s imitating you, admiring his work like you did with him. And what he sees is a being stripped from any likeness of a dignified human being. With eyes so blown he can see the bottommost pits of Hell in them.

And he’s satisfied, rewarding you with a soft kiss on your temple.

“I forgive you.”

Your release crashes over you like a tide, submerging you, burning you to cinders on the inside. Tearing you apart. And when he collapses on top you after filling you to the brim, you feel like a festering wound.

He’s a disease, miasma, a flesh-eating parasite crawling inside you.

“You’re…” you huff. “You’re awful.”

“I know. But you love me all the same.”

You wonder what you should have done to earn a different outcome, but you give up soon. Looks like he already had plans for your atonement in mind. After all, gods are impatient creatures. They’re dependent on your reverence and servitude. And you’ve waited for too long to make things right.

Why, why, why - it echoes inside your head.

But if you think about it… he’s your serpent. The vilest, most horrendous creature created by God. The one who charmed you, tempted you with sin and has now sunken his fangs into you. Of course he did, and instead of trying to heal from his venomous bite, you want to catch him - to find out his reasons, to prove to him that you didn’t deserve that.

And yet you could never, ever prove him wrong. Your serpent will always think it was right to bite. It’s in his nature afterall.

“Is your hand alright?”

He makes it up to you with spoiling you again. He cleans your wounds so sweetly, so thoughtfully, looks after you in a way that nobody could, which confuses you even further.

He cherishes you, destroys himself for the sake of keeping you safe - not like it’s a choice, but a must - just like a mother would. He scolds you, reminds you not to make the same mistake again, collars you, keeps you on a tight leash, only loosening it (just a little) when he succeeded at making you play by his rules, just like a father would.

And somehow, he excels at both. Way better than those two ever did when it came to you.

You wish your glare could pierce right through his skull when you hand the empty glass back to him. You don’t have it in you to play nice. You don’t even attempt hide that you’re sulking, he probably finds it funny - adorable even.

“Go to hell.” you spit and lay back into the sheets, your bruised back facing him.

“Oh, darling…” he coos, but the surface level sweetness of his tone hides a sharp edge of condescendence. He crawls into bed, right behind you, caging you in his embrace, forcing you to feel the warmth of his body. The warmth that you’re so used to, the one you can’t sleep without it. Nobody has ever made you feel this safe, and the fact makes your heart ache and your stomach twist.

“If there’s a Hell, I’ll see you there.”

#jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk smut #getou suguru x reader #getou suguru x y/n #getou suguru x you #jjk x reader #suguru geto x reader #meesa writes #DAAARLING GUESS WHOS COME BACK FROM JAIIIIL #Idk what kind of deep psychological issue of mine is in that fic but now its your job to decipher #just please dont bring Freud into the picture I hate that man

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respectthepetty · 4 months

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Because I think it would be really interesting and funny - can you rank the Pit Babe characters on your Alan&Pete scale? I'm curious to see where you're at with some of them lmao. Least to Favorite (though I know who your fave already is, lol).

Only if you want to tho, lol.

@slayerkitty, honestly, this list could just be these two lying bitches:

Big Red is not on this list since he is the big bad, but since I have no idea what the plot actually is, take all of this with a grain of salt. I wrote that I think all of them have superpowers since Big Red was collecting them like X-Men's William Stryker for his super mutant army, so I think Charlie's superpower is mind control, and I think Way's is controlling people's emotions.

WHICH PISSES ME OFF!

Babe was the prized super kid, so I think Big Red is pulling out all the stops to get his trophy racer back including sending all the other super kids to manipulate Babe with their superpowers, so let me rank them from dead-to-me to love-of-my-life:

The One I'm Ready to Box - Charles

Charles keeps moving Barbie's head and body to face him. He never lets Barbie turn away from him. Then, when Barbie is clearly upset, Charles continues to kiss him, which is why I think he his mind controlling Barbie. When his arm was in the sling, Babe could push him away before Charles could start his mind control bullshit. Sometimes, it's noticeable when Babe's face softens, which should come off as sweet like "ah, look how he drops his defenses around Charlie" BUT LOOK AT THE WAY HE DROPS HIS DEFENSES AROUND CHARLIE! Charles doesn't even know how to drive, yet Babe gave him a car. Charlie's dick game may be strong, but mind control is stronger.

10/10 Petes - It's on sight.

The One I'm Disappointed In - Waymond

Waymond had me the first two episodes. I was in his second-lead-syndrome corner, then he flipped the script in the third episode, and now I can't unsee the red flags. In episode four, I noticed twice how he touched Barbie, which prompted a shift in Barbie's demeanor. Much like Charles, I would love to believe that Waymond brings happiness to Babe's life, which is the reason Babe looks less sad when Waymond touches him, but HE LOOKS LESS SAD WHEN WAYMOND TOUCHES HIM! I think Waymond is controlling Babe's emotions, yet Babe still doesn't love him. It's the only saving grace for Waymond. Charles is using his powers to make Barbie love him, but Waymond isn't.

9/10 Alans - I'm gonna yell at him, then punch him.

The One Who Is Obvious - Jeffery

Jeffery is going to be with Alan, so I can't fully hate him since I love Alan. His superpower is apparently seeing the future, which makes sense why he was opposed to touch in the second episode, and that makes him useful in my touch=superpower theory for Charles and Waymond, so I hate him a little less. BUT if he had anything to do with Barbie's car going up in flames, so he could ensure Charles got a racing spot, -murder-

8/10 Petes - One wrong move and I'll end him where he stands.

The One Who Just Sucks - Winifred

Winifred is just a little bitch, but God is he annoying. I don't wanna know what he is saying because I'm sure it's as annoying as his face whining all the time. Only five episodes in, and the man still ain't tired of getting his ass handed to him by Barbie and Kimberly. Whatever he is plotting is dumb. Whatever he is complaining about is stupid. Whatever he is doing is already a failure.

7/10 Alans - I'm gonna push him into a real Christmas Tree, so he'll get scratched up and cry about it.

The One Who Is Gonna Suck - Decanus

Dean has yet to do anything solid, which means he is just waiting to fuck us over. I haven't seen him race or work on a car, so I'm thinking he'll be pissed that Charles is doing all the things he wanted to do, and screw over the entire team regardless of the race's outcome. Jealously makes people do crazy things, but he is going to be with Winner, so homie is going to go full crazy.

6/10 Petes - Anyone who fucks Whiny Winifred deserves to be slapped.

The Ones Who Ain't Loyal - North & Sonic

I simply don't trust them. They are too colorful in a show that's whole visual plot hinges on red versus blue. They need to pick a color. NOW.

5/10 Alans - I'll threaten them on work time, so they'll know I'm not afraid to lose my job if it means I can fight them.

The One Who Is Gonna Kill His Shitty Boss! - Kenta

Why is he still fucking with Big Red?! He would be much higher on this list but when Babe was fighting Big Red (both times), Kenta looked sad. If the flashback wouldn't have just showed Babe as a kid with his dad, I'd think Kenta was his actual brother. The way Babe yelled at him in the parking lot makes me think they have a long history, so I'm hoping once Kenta teams up with Kimberly, he'll be the good guy I know he can be.

4/10 Petes - If he kills his boss, he'll be number one in my heart forever.

The Pretty One - Peter

Pete is like a Lord of the Rings' elf. He is pretty. He is an archer. He is kinda sus. And he is the perfect ally. Much like those beautiful elves, I don't think he joined up with the blue team because he is a kind dude. This is for his own personal gain, which means he must have beef with Big Red; therefore, he has a superpower too. I think he heard Kenta or smelled Kenta's cigarette because Peter didn't turn around until Kenta turned around. He knew Kenta was there. And he sensed Waymond's emotion-changing powers too, so I'm okay with them being together (as long as he punches Waymond too).

3/10 Alans - Watching his every move . . . because I think he is pretty. Not because I think is he bad.

The One Who Will Solve It - Kimberly

Kim is a real one. He presents as red. He works for the reds. He is a red, and isn't ashamed of it. He hasn't faked his color, and in a perfect world, he'd be with Babe. I don't think he has a superpower, but if he did, it would be the power of common sense. He hates his coworker, Winifred, as any sane person would, so he gets the passenger seat in my car. He also got a handshake from Babe, so he already made friends with Babe. They would make a perfect pair. Barbie x Kimberly Ghost Ship is being captained by me.

2/10 Petes - We're frenemies!

The Main One - Barbie

Babe is the title character, and he is being manipulated and controlled by everyone around him, but . . . the boy is un pendejo. The first two episodes, he was a little too macho, and in episode three and four, he was un pendejo. He argued with Kenta when Kenta could have just kidnapped him, then he punched everyone on his way to Big Red's office, which makes no sense to walk directly up to the man who is going all out to get you back. He is in need of a good hug that does NOT lead to sex, and for someone to tell him he is more than his superpower (which is . . . being awesome at everything?).

1/10 Kanghans - I'm upset at him and for him all at once.

The One I Love - Alan

My man has committed no wrongs. He is amazing. He is fantastic. He is beauty. He is grace. He should slap all these fucking liars in the face.

But he won't because he is too pure for this world.

No Petes. No Alans. No Kanghan. Just love.

#pit babe #pit babe the series #trust no one #based off of nothing but vibes and colors #charles is a swipe left #alan is swipe right #and everyone else falls in between

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juneviews · 10 months

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Can you list the best straight couples in Thai movies or dramas in terms of chemistry?

sure :)

MY FAVE THAI DRAMA STRAIGHT SHIPS

KRATHING & DUCHESS (GIRL NEXT ROOM: RICHY RICH)

these two are just my faves, not just bc I love offmild, but also bc their story is simple, fun & wholesome, while still having some depth about generational poverty & superficiality. the chemistry is top-tier & this two are forever my fave thai straight pairing :)

ZEN & YUI (FABULOUS 30)

another off ship, shhhh I'm not biased he just slays so much it's not my fault! zen & yui are quite similar to krathingduchess in the sense that they're generally a very funny couple, yet they actually tackle a lot of issues about self confidence, appearances, intimacy, etc. they're not perfect but they're ADORABLE & I love them sm!

SOMCHAI & LINN (ANGEL BESIDE ME)

angel beside me is my fave straight thai drama bc somchai & linn are SO beautiful & wholesome. but similarly to the other previous ships, this show deals with a lot of deep issues related to poverty, toxic family members, etc. it's truly such a beautiful underrated show & absolutely deserved to pop off when it was released!

MEW & NEO (3 WILL BE FREE)

despite being the most underrated relationship in the 3wbf throuple, mew & neo are extremely iconic! first of all, yes mild lapassalan & joss wayar are two of the hottest people I know, thanks for asking, they make my bi heart very happy 😌 but also I love the evolution they have from enemies to lovers, and being both sex workers means they understand each other very well! they're just very cute together & I love them :)

SILA & MEEN (HUA JAI SILA)

not only is hua jai sila my favorite lakorn, but it's mostly bc of the pairing. I don't usually love pairings where the man is tortured & cold while the woman is perpetually kind & loving, but here it really worked for me. the chemistry is straight up FIRE, and you truly come to believe these two are such a beautiful & powerful team together. absolute cuties, and the fact that the female lead was a tor fan before that lakorn??? ADORABLE!

TANNAM & TEE (HAPPY BIRTHDAY)

to talk about a tragic couple (which also contains mild bc she owns this list lmao), we have happy birthday. mild & push are not only INCREDIBLY good looking together on top of being ABSOLUTELY TOP TIER actors, but the whole writing of this show will take your heart & play squash with it lmao. the chemistry is truly out of this world, and I cherish this show so much. the side ship of tonmai & his best friend (pluem purim & jan ployshompoo) is also ADORABLE!!!

VEE & KATE (THE REVENGE)

with how much I always scream about my love for this show, I hope that everyone knows by now that the revenge is one of the best thai dramas EVER MADE. one reason why I enjoyed this show so much, is that it balances legit the most gruesome murder story with a very cute & wholesome love story, AND IT WORKS. with mook worranit & non chanon being multiple times in this list which makes them thai romances experts, they really deliver a beautiful chemistry & love story. watch after the ending credits of the last episode, though!

BADZ & SMILE (BOY FOR RENT)

there is a reason boy for rent is one of the only straight gmmtv shows to have amassed so many millions of views, and it's that, on top of the hot shirtless men, badz & smile are absolutely one of the cutest pairings ever! their love story is a bit complicated but mond & fon's effortless chemistry really makes every viewer get attached to them immediately!

ANNIE & CHEN (MAMA GOGO)

here we have a very unexpected ship but SUCH a goodie! annie & chen are a funny, opposites-attract kind of ship but their chemistry is fire & they were just absolutely adorable! a truly wholesome pairing that will always put a smile on my face :)

AOM-AM & MIKE (FULL HOUSE)

now bringing it back to an OG iconic thai couple, we have full house! while this show has a lot of flaws, its pairing ISN'T one of them! the chemistry is top-tier, the story very touching & you spend so long with these characters you truly get so attached to them. absolutely adorable pairing :)

YING-YING & KORN / PAT & NOINA (46 DAYS)

now we have three recurring actors on this list at once! 46 days is such a cute show, it's chaotic, a bit surface-level, yet SO much fun! the main pairing composed of baifern & non is chemistry-central and absolutely great, but of course the side pairing of offmild (again! can't believe they got 2 shows together, it was such a slay!) stole my heart :)

KIEW & CHOMPOO (TO ME, IT'S SIMPLY YOU)

here we have another lakorn, that is this time barely a romance & more about a tight-knit community working together for a common goal & being cute, but the ship truly is TOP-TIER! one of the least problematic & toxic, and probably the most wholesome pairing I've ever seen! they're just too pure for this world & I absolutely love them :) (also green (kiew) & pink (chompoo) is my fave color combo hehe <3)

KLUAY & PUP (LOVE AT FIRST HATE)

you want chemistry?? YOU GOT IT! this is a pretty classic enemies to lovers thai story, very reminiscent of lakorns, but made better by the incredible male lead (I fell in love with him during this show, man's HOT!) & the really great chemistry between the actors! truly one of the best thai dramas for it, and even though I wasn't a big fan of all the tropes, this is one of the best thai straight dramas in my eyes!

BANK & LIN (BAD GENIUS)

even though I already loved the non x aokbab ship in the movie, in terms of series, jaonaay & juné were so good together! they even made a song together afterwards hehe, so cute! bad genius is such a good movie & it's also an amazing series, and even though there's a lot going on the brewing romance between bank & lin is SO GOOD! truly a show I'd recommend no matter what anyway :)

MIELLE & KIM (SENIOR SECRET LOVE: BAKE ME LOVE)

on the theme of chemistry, here we have a show that isn't exceptional but is absolutely CARRIED by its pairing! loving both actors from this pairing, it's no surprise they put their whole USSY in the chemistry, like I genuinely love this show bc they're too fucking cute!!! would recommend for a short, wholesome & easy watch :)

PHAT & CHER (CATCH ME BABY)

with the same female lead as the previous ship, we have my favorite straight recent pairing! not only is catch me baby such a fun show that I tremendously enjoyed, but the romance aspect is so cute & the chemistry??? PALPABLE! really such a lovely pairing I swear!

TEE & EL (BANGKOK LOVE STORIES 2: PLEAD)

once again our king non chanon is back, and here we have a story that did kinda disappoint me towards the end but is mostly amazing with a very powerful couple! emotions are high in that series, & I'm also so glad we get to see a really beautiful sex scene between them where usually thai dramas are more conservative, mostly regarding women. the cinematography of this show is also absolutely beautiful!

KRAAM & MAY (THE STRANDED)

I'm gonna try not to cry even though this makes me think of beam papangkorn's death, but the stranded truly was such a special thai show that deserved so much better. this pairing is a bit cliche but made better by the beautiful acting & chemistry beam & pat presented, as well as the beyond perfect cinematography (I think about the firefly scene shown above approximately once a week!) in my opinion, this is one of the most important thai dramas that is a must watch, so I would absolutely recommend it!

MINT & BEBE (MINT TO BE)

mook strikes again, this woman is incapable of having bad chemistry with anyone LMAO. this show is also one of my favorite thai straight series bc it's short, cute & very entertaining. the chemistry between mook & krist is also REALLY good, and the show was quite revolutionary in terms of pda for a gmmtv series at the time. I definitely recommend for a wholesome time :)

SKY & HOSHI (MY DEAR WARRIOR)

idk who thought of pairing up baifern & oab but they ATE! if you like scifi/supernatural shows, this will probably be right up your alley! I personally didn't really love this show even though I enjoyed a lot of aspects, but sky & hoshi truly were a great ship that I remember fondly! the chemistry was amazing & oab looks the hottest he's ever been in that role!

TOEI & TAR (HORMONES)

I couldn't talk about thai straight series without mentioning one of the most iconic ever, hormones! out of all the pairings, there is only one straight one I really loved, and it's toei & tar :) I'm always a sucker for the friends to lovers trope, but I thought this one was especially well done, especially considering toei & tar are some of the least unlikable characters from the show lol. they're very cute & wholesome and I thought I should include a high school love story in this list!

EMMA & PORSCHE (SENIOR SECRET LOVE: PUPPY HONEY)

despite being an offgun stan, I have to admit: I prefered porschemma to pickrome in puppy honey season one lol. despite being ruined in season two, emma & porsche are such a cute & wholesome ship, and them being reunited by dogs, which I'm obsessed with, only made their story cuter!

xxx

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this-ag-doll-is-a-butch · 2 months

Text

Clara Montoya: Autistic???

I've been getting back into AG for almost a year now. Josefina has always, always been my fave, since we were both nine years old.

I've been thinking about how I want her to have a counterpart in her time and location to actually interact with in period-appropriate ways. She never received a Best Friend doll, though :(

But really, her whole story is centered around her family anyway, and I've seen people talk about how 2005 GOTY Marisol Luna has been used to create Clara dolls. And yep, the resemblance is real.

So I have plans to get a Marisol and make her Clara. Although they may take a some months to come to fruition, considering all my other doll and fandom and plushie collection goals and IRL expenses 😔

But it's free to think about Clara's character and plan for what I want her collection to encompas.

The thing that strikes me most, looking at her now with the adult knowledge of being autistic myself- she REALLY seems like a character that one can headcanon as autistic with ease.

She's logical and practical and literal to a fault. She hates change and getting dirty and wants to keep everything organized. Sewing and embroidery are her special interests! She bonds with Tía Dolores through those interests! She clashes hard with Francisca, who just does not want to make the effort to understand her.

She has strong attachment to objects, to the extent that it becomes a huge part of the plot in "Josefina's Surprise." (The altar cloth, Niña.)

Niña is her comfort object, for fuck's sake!!!!! She manages to relinquish primary custody of Niña to Josefina, but ONLY after Tía Dolores managed to give her a new comfort object (Mamá's silver thimble.)

I mean, I think I need to closely reread all Josefina's series and acquire all short stories and the mysteries. What else is going on with dear Clara and her autism? Does she have sensory issues???

It goes without saying that Clara was never deliberately written as autistic, and of course in 1824 New Mexico, a word didn't exist for autism. But we autistics have always existed.

In terms of a potential collection- obviously Josefina's nightgown straight-up seems to be Clara's camisa and IDK how to feel about that. How can Josefina not have her nightgown??? 😭

One potential solution I've been thinking about is a similar nightgown for her but with a different neck ribbon. I can't sew, but it seems Etsy seller Magnoliawillows makes a similar nightgown with a blue ribbon which could be Josefina's new nightgown.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1325115163/josefina-montoya-style-night-shift

Also, I know her BeForever nightgown exists too. But I'm not as emotionally bonded to it, since it came after "my time" lmao. Maybe it would be nice if Clara and Josefina had summer and winter nightgowns 🤔

And I could get Josefina's BeForever bed for Clara! That's another reason why I want a Clara- to have a way to use more of Josefina's collection as I acquire it, especially the BeForever items.

And if AG could just get off their asses and GIVE JOSEFINA LITERALLY ANY COLLECTION AT ALL AGAIN, it would be great to buy whatever is (re-)released new and use it mostly for Clara, because that way I could have the beloved Pleasant Company versions of my memory yet also support Josefina's collection today.

Meet Accessories/Outfit ideas- Josefina's PC red-ribbon nightgown as camisa, different rebozo, moccasins, extra pair of Josefina bloomers, indigo skirt (although it would be interesting to try and see if someone sells/would make a skirt closer to book illustrations... however, 1820s New Mexican sisters, even in a well-to-do family like Josefina's, definitely shared clothes. So it would make sense from that perspective).

She'd need a doll-size pair of scissors, which Tía Dolores gave her, of course. And I'd want her to have some kind of necklace, because all AG historicals did/do. I'd need to know more about necklaces from then, though... perhaps some kind of mílagro, or Saint Clara symbol/medal? I'd want her to have a little sewing & embroidery kit to hang on her belt, too.

One thing that would take a lot more work, yet would make an amazing story, would be to somehow find another little doll's-doll like Niña. I have a whole story idea where some kind of secret room somehow gets found (maybe at Abuelito and Abuelita's house in Santa Fe) and a long-forgotten doll from Mamá and Tía Dolores' childhood gets given to Clara 🥺

Another idea would be to assemble stuff to create a little shrine for Clara and Josefina to pray at (yes I got the idea from the Mini World image). Especially because it would have Mamá's colcha-embroidered altar cloth! And just in general, part of why I connected with Josefina so much growing up was that her family is Catholic, just like mine.

These days, obviously, I'm a grown up monbinary gay ex-TradCath (similar to ExVangelical) with religious trauma, but maybe making a doll Catholic shrine would be a way to deal with that in a more healthy manner...

Anyway I would love to talk about Clara and Josefina!!!! Josefina-lovers please interact!!!!

#josefina montoya #clara montoya #american girl #agblr #autistic headcanon #best friend dolls #doll ideas #montoya family #religion cw #religious trauma mention

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spacenintendogs · 1 month

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5, 6, 1 for the ask game? If it’s not too much trouble ^^

1. Which part of the series was your introduction to HTTYD? How old were you when you first became a fan?

i rmr it pretty well. i was abt 11 years old & my mom found the first movie on comcast on demand & wanted to find a movie for us we (my siblings & i) hadn't seen so she chose it. i rmr the year prior with all the commercials on tv & stuff & was like hey!! i rmr wanting to see this! cool!! and i rlly liked the movie!!!!! my full obsession, however, didn't start until abt a year later when she brought home this pack of the first 6 books (that's all that was available at the time!) & reading through them i rewatched the movie & we had it on dvd by that point and that was it. the rest is history

5. What type of dragon do you think best matches your personality?

oh gosh. the impulse to say my fave but whispering deaths don't rlly "match" me personality wise. tbh a gronckle, me thinks. with a personality like meatlug or shattermaster. :') they're such goofy goobers but they're also rlly sweet & i am so soft for that LOL. they remind me of the dog i grew up with with how snorty they are & the way they wag their tails :'))

6. What are your favourite ships in the fandom and why?

haaaa.

snotstrid... IDK their chemistry is just??? i love how they constantly bicker & snotlout is just a piece of shit & it causes astrid to retaliate & treat him like that even when he's not actively being a piece of shit which pisses him off & yet they always somehow end up by each other or saving each other much to astrid's chagrin half the time & then snotlout's confusion UGH ESP SNOTLOUT'S ANGELS the nose flick & then astrid admitting she doesn't hate him & his FACE HIS FUCKING FACE he's so got a genuine crush on her but doesn't know how to Behave & i love them getting together & then breaking up & for astrid it's smth she looks back on fondly but never wants to go back to while snotlout is stuck adding her to his list of ppl being the one that got away & yearning..... they're also so funny together & i feel like if they're ever on the same page they're so powerful & it's scary LOL

fishlout used to be my fave & i still love it. rtte spent more time building their relationship to each other than either of them with ruffnut & we all saw the potential of what could have been :') it can easily fall into the jock x nerd thing but it's more than that to me bc while fishlegs is anxious he doesn't take snotlout's shit lying on his back (esp after gem of a different color) & by rtte fishlegs is rolling his eyes & quipping back & it's just forever this contest of who comes out on top & then u have thw whole thor bonecrusher thing & it can so easily be an exploration in snotlout's bisexuality (and fishlegs'!) esp after return of thor bonecrusher when snotlout is just SO happy fishlegs is back to the point where he gives him a hug (and was like :D woah when fishlegs bodied a dude to protect him) & they def had a brief stint after that. they don't talk abt it. it's only between them... snotlout yearns so badly...

i'm realizing my fave ship is anything that'll make snotlout yearn & wish he could have someone as all of his friends find their ppl or are comfortable with themselves enough to not need a romantic partner LMAO

i like a lot more ships than i talk abt tbh!! i just like taking characters like they're my dolls and making them kiss lol. heathstrid, ruffther, hiccstrid, heathlegs, rufflout, rufflegs, tufflegs, eretlout, etc!! i like the art & fics ppl make abt tufflout but it's just not my thing (if that makes sense!!) i also like lot of the poly ships, too! literally i just thrive off making this group of teens who probably spend too much time together but don't rlly have anyone else to spend time with have relationship drama LOL

#THANK U EM!!! <3 #httyd #httyd ask game #eemoo1o #rose answers #em tag #<3<3<3 ily ty!!!

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honeybleed · 3 months

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this shit is getting out of hand. tee is absolutely diabolical. the bitch is basically moving like a cult leader and her mindless flunkies will do anything as long as they think it’ll move them up in her friendship circle or whatever the fuck idk i just woke up so i may not be making sense rn lol…. anyway, the fact that they’re so “bold” to send the most dehumanizing shit to your inbox but can’t do it off anon? sounds like a bunch of insecure, self-loathing pussies to me, just saying 🤷🏾‍♀️

she really thinks she can drive yet another amazing creator off the platform with false accusations and an army of minions who, more than likely, have nothing to live for but her i guess. i hope you’re okay through all of this. and to all the haters in your asks:

i can’t see how you’re satisfied with your actions. you are the lowest of the low. hurling racial slurs, having an abundance of malice in your heart, thinking you won’t suffer the consequences? that’s just sad. you should be ashamed of yourselves. i know you’re not though. you’re not the shit, you’re nothing, you will never be anything. you’re just scum of the earth. racism isn’t cute and it doesn’t make you look cool. y’all better chill out before i smack the fire outta y’all but i’m gonna hold myself back from violence. i’m better than that and will not stoop to your level which is probably in the tenth circle of hell.

sweetheart, you deserve so much better than this. don’t let these idiots believe they have some sort of power over you. they don’t and never will. keep doing what you do and hopefully these bozos will learn their lesson and if they don’t, oh well. they’re lost causes anyway.

thank you so much for this message you are so considerate and kind to send this i’m so grateful seriously 😞

it’s really been weighing on me that as a black person you will automatically branded as difficult and aggressive for simply speaking out on things lmao or people downplay how serious antiblackness is

the slurs are all childish and unoriginal yes but at the same time these are words meant to dehumanise me and other black people

nobody is gonna drive me off i promise, it’s already disheartening so many of my fave creators have left after the ezra bs like 🙄

people can have opinions of me of course, you can dislike me but the fact if the roles were reversed and i was in her shoes, i would make it clear as day people sending asks with slurs to a person i disagreed with is absolutely wrong. and in fact, tee’s anons were antiblack to my friend karma who left as well but tee was busy laughing and mocking the fact karma left lol

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khaleesiofalicante · 4 months

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More thoughts🤭

It was like there were two different people.The boy he fell in love with and the man he married. They were two different people: I've been looking for a way to describe the differences between teenage Mavid and adult Mavid and this is just perfect, because if LBAF 4 had been different, less cruel to them they would've been different-saddest part is that Lance's accident has a huge part in it so Mallory isn't a canon event but them changing so much is, right? Please tell me I'm wrong

Lance appearing like a selfish cunt is Alec's fault (he tried) but he really ended up being a selfless softie because his heart is like his daddy's and papa's

I just need to see that scene with Other Max finding Other David after he ran away (it's haunting me😭) but also I'm sure it changed him a lot and maybe it was something Max had to go through here too but didn't?

Even if time travel is real, you can’t change the past…You can only manipulate the past to change the future. : Finally starting to make some sense of time travel, which just makes me even more scared,I don't know how that's possible at this point

Cute flashback:Theia squealing when she saw Lance when she was a kid, adorable-Theia that's your future husband hunny (because he'll survive)

Madeleine and Joseph:a very good choice for the "It" couple of idris. Theia and Kincaid? Absolutely not, what's wrong with that country?

Madeleine saying she's grateful she said goodbye to her parents and knowing she didn't with Joseph hurts

David had held him that night and whispered to him in the darkness. “You love so much that I sometimes forget there are those who don’t even like me.”: I knew that quote would hurt, and I was right

I will be ignoring all the angst with the trial because my brain hasn't processed yet and I would like to preserve the shreds of sanity I have left thank you very much

Could Arthur's dreams play a major role? Them coming true like Magnus' if they both have a thing with dreams? And Arthur "manifesting" is part of that?

Is the reason Arcaid isn't canon the fact that Kincaid'd existence maybe isn't canon? Since it happened because of Other Max?

Let's talk about Arthur's birth and Selena in other timeline👀

Patiently waiting for Max to kick Lance's ass for pretending to hate David

Random thought but in Arthur chapter it says David's getting sick in winter, is that like Magnus got sick because winter triggered his depression? Or is it because of Lance's birthday?

I feel like what Jackson told Lance in IALS "You're very close to becoming the villan of this story" will turn into a line that will be very important in LBAF

Is Cami close with Camilla?

Not Cami thinking shadowhunters are the superior race:damn who raised this girl?

Yes Cami Theia wants to go to her travel year for a boy-no Cami it's not Kincaid, what happened to parabatais communicating?

Theia wants to get laid Cami. And help obviously-but also get laid. I'm liking Theia more and more

Will Cami think Lance is exploiting Theia when she finds out?

At first I didn't like the idea of Cami going to New York but I couldn't tell why? And then she went all I'll find the entrance to the Pandemonium and that's not good. Thank God Max knows what she's up to

Joan drawing good runes goes to the list of things that will potentially turn into a big thing👀

I was today years old when I realised that LBAF 6 ends on Lance's bday. This is not good. Not good. Not good.

I will stop now because this is again getting very very big. And to no one's surprise I have even more notes, but I will share those another time😅

Also this song reminded me of Blackbane and I really love it: Valentine by Maneskin (Maneskin have a very Blackbane vibe I think👀) Love ya, I really really hope you get better soon🌼

First things first. Maneskin is one of Lance's fave band (and mine lmao). AND VALENTINE IS VERY BLACKBANE FOR SURE. In fact, every lbaf playlist has an important Maneskin song for an important scene. I'll keep the one LBAF 6 to myself for now hehehe.

Let's dive innnnn.

I'm legally not allowed to comment on this. But in my mind mavid is one of those couples who doesn't have a perfect life. Every life (like IALS, FMF, LBAF) has a lot of pain for them to get through as a couple and that's one of their things. It's part of their story. As one of them said (or is yet to say), it's not about living a good life, but just living a one, even a bad one, with you.

these lightwood-banes boys will be death of me sigh

Unfortunately not part of the fic but if inspiration strikes who is to say...(maybe you can give it a shot!)

I can safely say that figuring out the time travel nuances for this fic has broken my brain :)

BABY BLACKBANE OMG? THE CUTEST-

Tincaid or Keia sounds CURSED.

Yeah. I wrote that whole thing in just because it hurt so good ngl.

Mavid angst >>>

Council trials are a different kind of trauma bro seriously

Maybe they can speak to each other in their dreams 👀

Kincaid's existence definitely isn't canon, meaning he doesn't exist in every world - or even fic. Here's some angst for you. He doesn't exist in FMF.

Not very different at all actually. At least, not in any important way - I THINK. Except that I'd say Selena, Max and a couple of other family members must have played a big role in convincing Other David to have the second kid because Other Max wasn't there to do it.

Same. REALLY. Same.

It's both. It's also all the memories associated with Lance's birth itself, not just his birthday/prophecy trigger.

Yes! We are yet to see some of these dynamics. Camila is closest to Cami and Atlas :)

The Clave :/ (but in all honestly, as we are yet to explore, Cami is exact the kind of person that will come out if you are raised in the capital city of your government and grew up in a government building constantly surrounded by politicians and your president father. Unlike Rafael, who actually had a much rounded upbringing, Cami grew up in Idris. It has influenced her personality a lot)

Parabatais communicating? Since when? Never heard of that before.

She knows what she wants and I say good for her. Also damn these blackthorns are such hoes.

I mean she's already kind of thinking it (in the latest chapter she wonders if lance only helped theia/kelpies to manipulate the clave etc)

Cami going to New York is the best that ever happened to her - and for many other people hehehe.

Ohhhhhhh?

What do you mean it ends on Lance's birthday?...Am I missing something 👀

Thank you for all the thoughts. They really made my day - which was otherwise not so good. I really really hope I will get better soon too because I have plans for 2024 and they need me to do some work hehe.

Love you 💜

#lbaf

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bropunzeling · 6 months

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Director's commentary, anything from mattdrai soulmate AU (or future snippets!)

hello anon! gosh it's been a while since ive looked at this one; here's the early section where they are in germany and going for a little walk:

Leon harries Matthew until they’re both dressed and ready to go, grabbing a spare key from the table in the hall. The weather outside, once they get there, isn’t too bad; it’s a little brisk, but nothing that either of them can’t handle compared to an Alberta spring. Matthew still looks shivery, though, hands tucked into his sweatshirt pocket and head bowed. [poor bondsick matthew! in all seriousness figuring out how to portray bondsickness was honestly really fun - just being a pathetic lil mess until someone touches you. idk if i ever said so explicitly in the fic/fully committed, but in my head/memory as of now, i think it's one of those things that is not so much caused by physical distance but by emotional distance. they haven't figured out/reconciled their feelings = you get sick. leon leaving was just a triggering event. but the beauty of never saying so explicitly is i can't get it wrong either way lmao.]

“Hey,” Leon says, bumping Matthew with his elbow until Matthew looks up. “You okay?” he asks, feeling like a broken record, but there’s not—what else is he supposed to do? [leon just actively flailing throughout the whole of the 2022 sections was also fun. he's a demonstrative guy but it's hard to be demonstrative when you don't have a clear sense of what either of you want. also, he is not yet willing to internally acknowledge how important matthew is to him, so he's just gonna... kinda suck at it.]

“Yeah,” Matthew says flatly. There’s big purple circles under his eyes. It makes Leon think again about how badly Matthew’s taking it, much worse than how Leon’s doing. Sure, he supposes he didn’t feel great for the twenty hours they were separated by an ocean, but he also didn’t look like he’d been run over by a zamboni. [bc you are not in emotional turmoil my guy]

Leon knows, at this point, that he should know better, but he’s still not sure how exactly all of this works. Bond-sickness is a thing from romance novels and weepy made-for-TV movies, not for a couple of hockey players who are regularly a continent apart. [again because it's an emotional thing, and leon isnt ready to clue into the emotional aspects of their relationship - purposefully oblivious] Leon leaving shouldn’t have done anything, he’s pretty sure. What difference would the Atlantic make, compared to North America? [bc you ~left~ him/aren't easily accessible anymore!]

Besides, in every depiction of bond-sickness he’s seen—which was mostly the one movie Kim watched on repeat when she was thirteen, some weepfest based on a Nicholas Sparks novel that Leon got so sick of he threatened to snap the DVD in half [my favorite thing about writing aus is figuring out alternate media for aus. i love a shitty reality tv concept. i love a bad romance novel. i love an ed sheeran ballad. it's the most fun part and also is such an easy way to add color and a sense of heft to your world building.]—it always happens to both sides of the bond. He’s pretty sure that if Matthew’s sick, he should be too, or else neither of them should be. [more hinting at one-sidedness] Which—that’s something he’s not sure he wants to interrogate too closely.

“Here,” Leon says finally, pulling at Matthew’s arm until he finally manages to get at Matthew’s hand. “Let me just—”

The second his fingers wrap around Matthew’s, Leon has a sensation of realignment, like one of his joints has eased back into place. Matthew starts to look more alive, color returning to his face as he sighs with relief. It’s kind of fucked up, how much touching makes things better, but it’s kind of cool, too, that this is all it takes. [one of my fave lines! (a) i think that would be the appeal of a thing like a bond to me, that you can make each other feel better and (b) i like it as an unconscious acknowledgement on leon's part that he wants matthew to feel better. he gives a shit! it isn't really platonic anymore even if he can't see that or admit it]

“This okay?” Leon asks, darting a glance at Matthew before looking down the street.

“Yeah,” Matthew says, fingers squeezing once. “I mean—if you don’t mind.”

“Whatever will help,” Leon says, more sincerely than he means to.

Leon started their walk without any destination in mind, but it isn’t far from his parents’ new house to the west bank of the Rhine. Once they get to the river, they stop, looking out at the Rodenkirchen bridge, huge and coppery green; the trees dotting the riverbank on the opposite side; the water reflecting the bridge as it flows north. There are ducklings following their parents down through the current, people walking past with dogs and strollers or only themselves. It’s peaceful to be around other people, to hear pieces of their conversation and the rush of the river and Matthew’s steps in time with his own. [i never made it to cologne but it looks really gorgeous in pictures! love a big bridge by the river. fixes me every time]

He wonders what it’s like for Matthew, somewhere unfamiliar, where not even the background noise is the same. [there's a thing about this that like, is tricky to articulate but i'll do my best lol - when they were both in alberta, they were both far from/couldn't always go home, which is a theme i find compelling (see marriage bets) but leon is obviously more separated. and during the 2022 sections of the fic, it was fun to explore matthew as the one far from home, in an unfamiliar environment, with leon as the one fixed point. idk! it's a fun theme.]

“Want to go farther?” he offers, tugging their hands towards the river. “Not too bad right now.”

Matthew nods, fingers tightening around Leon’s. “Sure,” he says. “If you want to.”

“Yeah,” Leon says. Now that he’s looking at Matthew, it’s like he’s gotten stuck, gaze snagged on Matthew’s eyes, as clear and blue as the spring sky. [ur in love with him. hope that helps.] He has to blink hard before he can look away, back to the tree-lined path and the river ahead. “Yeah, I want to.”

They spend another half an hour walking down the river and back, until it’s too cold to continue. [i just love a romantic walk!] Then they turn down into the neighborhood, wandering streets that should be more familiar to Leon than they are. [another bit of that far from home theme; what even is home in the first place if you've spent your adult life somewhere else?] Eventually they find a café and Leon gets them coffee, more to warm their hands more than anything else. Matthew stumbles through a “Danke schön” when he takes his.

“Did you practice or something?” Leon asks, raising his eyebrows.

The tips of Matthew’s ears flush, [he has been practicing for at minimum six months and at least a year. maybe started during those summer calls. he has an irrational hatred for the duolingo owl] and he takes a long sip of coffee. Leon decides not to push. It’s just—unexpected, is all.

Eventually they find their way back to the right street. Matthew’s shivering again. Leon should’ve given him one of his heavier jackets; they’re close enough to the same size. [them being the same build is important and sexy to me] He’ll remember next time.

“You good?” he asks again.

Matthew nods, takes another sip of coffee. “This is strong,” he says, narrowing his eyes.

“I’ve been telling you, your coffee is shit,” Leon says easily, accepting the misdirection. [european coffee just is better. alas.]

“Just because you’re a snob,” Matthew retorts, and they’re back to not quite normal, but closer. When Matthew nearly shoves him off the sidewalk mid-argument, it’s practically a relief. [they will always be a little bit butting heads but in a fun flirty way :)]

#ask meme #soulbond au

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paigemathews · 7 months

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Is Paige your favourite sister? Your URL made me wonder is all lol

Okay, so full admission, in case anyone hasn't picked up on it yet. @phoebehalliwell almost singlehandedly inspired me into creating a full on Charmed sideblog, and you can absolutely tell bc I 100% based what I was doing on her when I first started. Nowadays, I like to think that I'm being slightly more original but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯. Part of that was, clearly, the URL bc I looked at the URL box when I was creating the blog and just screeched in unholy panic and doing the most blatant ripoff you've ever seen, complete with b-movie incorrect spelling. (in my defense, the actual spelling was taken!)

but the reason I picked Paige was bc she was definitely my childhood favorite! Admittedly, the reason she was my childhood favorite is bc she was a redhead like me lmao. (look, my first time watching Charmed was when I was an actual child, that was my only requirement for a character to be my favorite.) Nowadays, she probably ties with Prue in regards to my favorite sister!

Admittedly, I'm always a sucker for the untapped potential and Paige has a lot! I'd have to loved to see more storylines focus on her, especially in regards to her past, her powers/heritage, and her forging her path into the magical world.

However, I also just really like her as a character. She's a very creative and compassionate character, and I loved her arc about discovering her inner Whitelighter. She had a very genuine love of magic like Phoebe in the early seasons, but while Pheebs had more of a personal gain thing going on (which I'm not dissing!), Paige had more of that desire to help.

I also liked how Paige, who lost her family and... forgot, for lack of a better term, what it was like to have one, clashed with the sisters initially but also was able to help Piper through her grief over losing Prue and created these relationships with her newfound sisters. I'm also a sucker for how she met Henry, someone who got it in ways that her sisters could never really grasp fully, and they created their own family as well. As rushed as s8 was, I like that Paige's journey on the show was not only joining a family but choosing to invite someone into hers to create another, if that makes sense.

Honestly, I don't really know if I have a super concrete reason for why Paige is my favorite, but just like. the vibes. I definitely named my blog after her bc she was my childhood fave, but I also adore her so I think it works out. She's definitely a fun character to make aesthetics (along with being the next character whenever I get around to my next Warren Witch Project witch) and write for (also known as she's the main character in one of my main four WIPs rn).

Also, redheads still tend to be my favorite characters lmao.

#charmed #asks #paige matthews #like!! the issue is that paige never had nearly as many focal storylines as the other sisters and got some questionable writing over the ye #but i love her anyways and idk how well i explained it tbh but paige <3 #abi speaks

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brbabcseu · 2 months

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journal #1: secrets & stars

Something I wasn't sure I was ready to happen yet just happened and it was... great?? OK, let me get into it.

I told my dad once that I store my memories in a Russian doll. They just make the most sense that way—one wrapped in another wrapped in another. Maybe it’s the ADHD, maybe it’s the creative house we’ve cultivated, but I can’t help but feel the connection everything has to, well, everything. I told him I think of constellations and pinpoint the starts as the glue of my wandering thoughts.

Storytime! Back when I was 10 we were at the crafts store and I saw these.

And obviously I needed them. I have this friend, Sam (she's more like my sis tho honestly, don't tell her I said that it'll go to her head!!) and she had ones like these in purple. I asked my dad if I could buy them to make my room cool and he was like "Whaaat isn't your room already cool enough? With your posters, your sick guitar? Beanbag chairs?" And it's like c'mon dad, those aren't decorations those are just things. I said as much but he already knew he was getting them for me lol, and all for "the low price of free-99". Lame-o.

So we strung the lights up in my room-- dad had to break out the step ladder to crisscross them on the ceiling for maximum effect, but it was very worth it. When he turned off the light, everything was in this golden glow, and I just remember feeling a little awestruck. "It's like we brought the stars outside, inside!" We both laid on the ground to stargaze for a bit, which is a tooth rotting memory.

I took them down the next day, though. Or started to before dad caught me and was like ??? dude what. So here's the thing, I don't always know what's right in a social situation, I don't always know "what's cool", and so I stupidly bragged about my new stars to the guys at school. What was I thinking? One of em, Ethan (asshole) said having string lights as a guy was... hm. Idk if I'm allowed to say this here but it rhymes with 'baggy'. Yeah. My dad was completely shocked when I told him. Maybe I'm crazy, but he also looked almost... guilty? No clue why that was, or why I noted that, but he just seemed really deep in thought in a way I didn't expect him to be. But that's my dad-- he's an unexpected guy.

For a straight dude, I'd say he gave me a pretty good talk abt it. "Sometimes boys like other boys. And that’s chill. Shouldn't be a big deal. But some people can be mean. Really, really mean." He said one of the mean things they do is call people that word when they think they’re gay. Little 10 year old me was confused. Wtf's that got to do with lights? That's not how I said it because, again, child lmao but ykwim. He said it doesn't. Jerks just wanna pick on others for being different. And what he said next really really stuck with me. “He shouldn’t make you feel like you’re not the boy you know you are just because you want to put the stars on your ceiling. His loss. Only insecure people treat people that way.”

We deemed Ethan "not Mr. Rogers approved" and he helped me restring those lights again, they've been up on my ceiling ever since :)

Jesus I rambled way too long and I was supposed to talk about what recently happened!! Like I said, constellations, Russian dolls. Everything connects.

So, I wasn't sure I was bi till like a year ago. I've always noticed it but maybe was scared of it being true. It's 2026, things have really changed, but tiny towns can still be tiny towns, and I didn't wanna find out if things would change. Especially with dad. Which like, why? Y'kno?? I shouldn't have had any fears about it at this point but sometimes this changes the game for some parents and I didn't wanna lose him. OUGH I'm getting emotional just thinking about it, pull it together AJ!!

I just so happened to remember everything about the stars when out w the old man at the diner. It's our fave hangout. Honestly the only hangout in this tiny ass town. My 8th grade dance is coming up soon and he thinks this is Disney Channel and that I'm gonna ask someone hahaha. C'mon man, no one asks anyone out, it's gonna be like every middle school dance we've had so far and we're all just gonna stand around each other awkwardly XP w/e. He's asking abt the girls, which girl am I gonna ask, blah blah. I just KNOW he does this to be annoying on purpose. It kind of struck a nerve though since it's about this... stuff. But this was my window. Dude, I was so fucking nervous for no reason HAHAHA. I was like yeah, there's some girls I would ask if ppl actually asked... but maybe there's also some boys too. I asked him if that was okay. I know, dumb. 'Hey, do I have permission to be bi?' Nahh. He didn't say anything bc I kept blabbing. "I don't want to hide anything from you, I know I don't have to, please say something" etc etc. Finally he put his hands over mine and like, stared into my soul and just said, "Okay." And I was like, "Okay." My god it was such a fucking relief. He even got a big laugh outta me, talking about my taste in boys, if it's any better than my taste in girls. Um, rude!

So yeah, he let me know this doesn't change a thing. I could've criiieeed, I swear (hey maybe I did a little, shush). But it's done! It's out there! No more secrets!! My friends all already know too, they were the first to, and were happy to hear about dad's reaction. If others find out now, I'd like to think I won't gaf. Everyone I care abt already knows and supports me. As I'm writing this, I'm looking up at the stars on my ceiling. I feel they have new things to show me. I'm hopeful for that, at least. <3

#aj blabs #march 1st 2026

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gohandinhand · 9 months

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Top 5 fave fanfics you've ever read

"pls nothing that requires research" -> this lmao. could i help myself anyway? no. i went and retrieved my laptop from the dining room and brought it to bed to start digging into this. me at 10:15pm:

but here’s the deal: there’s no way in hell i can give you my fave fics of ALL time. i’ve been reading fic for many years, some of them on sites that no longer exist. there are several “sorry, this fic has been deleted!” entries in my ao3 bookmarks. a lot of those years were also in the hp fandom, which is not a topic i’m willing to revisit given the situation now, despite the fact that i read many incredible hp fics & crossovers.

also, my memory is swiss cheese! but i can give you 5 fics that come to mind as ones i’ve revisited time and time again over the years. for many of these, i feel an enduring gratitude for it as a work that introduced me to the author(s) as someone whose writing i want to follow. & some of them became buddies which is! cool! for me. it’s an hour past my bedtime now so here’s what springs to mind:

you’re magic & you’re real by @unicyclehippo and @possibilistfanfiction (who also has a bunch of tumblr ficlets for this au under #gaf au) [the 100, clexa] it’s been 7 years and i still reread it at least annually. the universe, this version of these characters - it is precious to me. tender.

You Still Make Sense to Me (Your Mess is Mine) by @emilyjunk [pitch perfect, bechloe] angie is going to kill me for this in the morning because she wants it to be forgotten she ever wrote bechloe lmao but! despite that! i still reread this regularly. they’re so dumb and i love them so much. i can’t keep saying ‘tender’ yet that’s how i feel about this one too!

Something Suspiciously Close to Hope by @hedaswolf [the 100/Stranger Things crossover, clexa] ok, i did watch most of the first season of stranger things before it got too scary for me and never picked it up again. however, the wholesome ache this induces is the right palate cleanser for certain kinds of despair.

The Key to Byzantium by MarcusRowland [buffy/stargate sg1 crossover] wildcard, stargate was my parents’ fandom when i was a kid lmao. a decade and a half and it’s just a casual thing i want to have fun bopping to every so often!

the wn fandom has so so so many incredible fics & writers, but the fandom is too new to have any idea yet of what fics will endure for me. but so far show me something of a reckoning by @lucytara [warrior nun, avatrice] is something i have already reread… a ridiculous number of times. some phrases in this are so delicious & sticky for my brain that when i was writing pnw au i actually had to go check to make sure i wasn’t accidentally plagiarizing (and caught it a few times, whoops!)... it's absolutely incredible. have a good feeling about the staying power on this one.

#i worked on this list for two hours and blew my bedtime lmaoooooo #but i'm staying up late rereading things out of my bookmarks this is so fun 🥹#so thank you this was a great ride! now i will have to answer everything else in the morning lol #asked #ask game

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ivypost · 19 days

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AS LONG AS THE LEMON TREES GROW

!!spoiler alert!!

I just finished reading the book "as long as the lemon trees grow" by Zoulfa Katouh AND GUYS.

GO READ IT IF YOU HAVEN'T YET!

To begin with, I'm not much of a reader, I do read, but very occasionally. AND I FINISHED THE BOOK IN TWO SITTINGS.

SOLID 9/10!!!

Firstly, I love the way the whole book was crafted, the words, the language, the characters, some specific lines tore into my flesh and touched my bones.

here's one of my faves

"THIS LAND IS ME AND I AM HER"

The words were so well crafted to the point were you could actually see everything happen, the words so well woven together your brain creates imagery!

I recommend reading this book if you want to empathize more with what's going on in Palestine, it gives you this sort of individualistic look into what's going on there.

ALSO SALAMAH AND KENAN ARE SO CUTE TT MY HEART!

The only part I wished to see was more of them working through their differences and disagreements and I feel like that would have explained their chemistry better rather than just giving off "made for each other" vibes.

BUT REGARDLESS THEY ARE TOO PERFECT I CAN'T.

And Layla, Layla sounds like a beautiful person inside out and i wish she and Hamza had a happy ending too my heart aches for them.

and another part that didn't sit right with me which is the MAJORRR reason I gave the book a 9 and not a 10 was because of the part where when Salamah comes home with Kenan and she realizes Layla for the past six months was a Hallucination, I felt like she got over it too quick and the writing didn't really capture the depth of the situation or what she was feeling. because guys according to Salamah she just relived Layla's death but we don't see enough of her processing that.

But the part that also struck me from the whole Layla hallucination thing was how people literally live with us through our memories of them. being physically close to someone is just one aspect of being close with someone. People are remembered by us by the things they say, things they love, the scents they wear, and the things they create and I just love the idea of it. I love the Idea of how strong of an Impact these things about us can leave on someone.

And although Khawf isn't depicted to be the best character I think she really needed Khawf to protect her and keep her safe and I mean, Khawf is a part of her afterall so it makes sense i guess?

Thank you for reading and I apologize if none of what i said made sense because my thoughts are very scattered and I often find it hard to weave It and streamline into one Coherent sentence LMAO.

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ndostairlyrium · 9 months

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Fanfiction Writer Bingo 🎲

Tagged by @greypetrel ✨ thanks dear ;; also for your input!

Edit: @shivunin I just noticed your tag, thank you so much ;; 💛

Before developing some of the slots, I'm quoting what @greypetrel wrote about the central statement, which is one of the reasons I asked for her opinion:

FanFiction is an actual literary genre as much as anything that gets written and read by other people. It's niche and it's for free, it doesn't mean it's inherently bad. "Fan Fiction" shouldn't be a synonym with "Poor writing and lack of originality"... Or no fanfiction would ever be published and sold millions of copies, am I right? ;) ("But some FF is pretty bad.". Yes, but so are published books. Publishing comes with editors and translators, authors are not alone and yet I could give you examples of published books that are just good to be used for decoupage.)

For me it was totally one of those "ooh, that makes sense" moments one has when reading something they never thought about. Both here and privately she put things in a way that makes absolutely sense and I wanted to highlight it ;; hope you don't mind having this reposted <3

Anyway!

I'm not an elder in whatever fandom space but I do have both a livejournal and a ff.net account lol and I still hold gently in my hands my efp account - if you're italian and into fics you know that site don't lie a nonna >> *buca palloni*

I tried to post on wattpad last year but I'm afraid I'm too old for that site :'D even if it has some cool personalization features.

I did roleplay! A lot, actually! it was my personality trait for a while lol VtM was a big fave <3 I even wrote a small short story instead of an actual backstory for the character I never had the chance to play ;;

Everything I write is 100% self indulgent << never doubt that!

Whatever you see going on in my tags here on this blog, I do that too on comments most of the times. Dude, I edit my comments twice before posting because they're filled with "aaaa eeeek uuuughhh"s :'DDD also they're full of gifs and memes << I'm an annyoing commentator (is that english? lmao) I really should restart reading and commenting fics now that I'm officially on holidays ;;

I do have three unfinished projects. Unfortunately, one is like... To be fair, I'm still bitter about how I handled it, because it's that fic that "deserves more attention". Deserved it, actually, and I forced myself to remove it because the fact that it had few interactions and it wasn't well received even within my mutual's circle was giving me severe anxiety. I took it way too personally <<' Now, I must thank and praise @underneathestars here because if it wasn't for her support, I wouldn't even have posted the final chapters of the first part. That was an "I wrote it for fun, I wasn't having fun" type scenario, basically. I was in a bad headspace and now that I'm less demanding with myself I'm starting to having much more fun writing ;; it took me a while to figure out that I don't need to be perfect in something I like to do in order to enjoy it and now I'm legit having the time of my life with the one I'm posting :'D

Sorry for the rant lol

Blank and tags:

I'm tagging: @underneathestars (ofc <3) @sparatus @demandthedoodles and I see everyone else had been tagged lol so whoever wants to do this, consider yourself tagged

#writing #fanfiction writer bingo #tag meme #I really should take a deep breath and stop worrying about posting my stuff in english lol #translating is hard guys

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welcomingdisaster · 10 months

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2 and 25? 😁

2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom

oh no my only weakness... i have to be real every single ship i write i imagine switchy. so take this as a "in certain circumstances" kind of thing. i have written fic that contradicts both of these. it'll be compelling (hopefully) but honestly i don't know if i'll believe it. buuut. maedhros is absolutely a control freak that doesn't like being vulnerable, and sleeping with people is already toeing the line a little bit too much. i wrote enemy of good in part about his control issues in bed and i think that fic kind of captures my headcanons about his general vulnerability issues. i'm working on a longer fic about him experimenting with trauma through kink, and the rush that having power over people gives him -- so i lean towards "maedhros has to be in a very good mental state to bottom, which, considering that he wouldn't recognize a good mental state if bit him in the ass, means he doesn't really bottom." also hmmm. miriel is equally a control freak in my mind's eye. she will bottom but she will never stop bossing her partners around. she has an artistic vision for this sexual encounter please stop interrupting her creative process with your leg cramps 25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing oh man I do not know if I have a good answer for this. here are two weird ones i know that banning a language is a shitty move but i feel like. the level at which people talk about thingol is a person for banning quenya among his people is weirdly disproportionate to the action, especially considering it was prompted by him finding out he was lied to about the deaths of his own people. like it feels like people assign that action a worse moral value than all the murder. that being said that is such a feanorian assessment of morality i do kind of loop back around to admiring it. i'm also reaaallly over hearing arguments about what tolkien intended or wanted in terms of shipping (i think it's still an interesting question when we interpret some other parts of the text!). "tolkien was a catholic who would have hated your gay ships" has weirdly managed to make it on my dash several times and that is obviously the worst one. but i also kind of find the argument of "no i promise tolkien actually made x ship gay on purpose" kind of... tinfoil hat-y? i've never been convinced by them. and honestly, i don't really like the whole framework of applying authorial intent to ships. my current #1 favorite ship for the fandom was absolutely, 110% not intended, but i just... don't need jirt's permission or intention in this. i feel like the arguments about whether something like russingon or turleg (two ships i really like, mind you!) were intended by canon kind of imply that they would be less valid if they were not?

i have no idea if this makes sense & i do actually find the queer readings/analysis very interesting. but if anything i generally tend to assume that they leaked into tolkien from the (secretly queerer than we assume?) fairytales/myths/epics he was inspired by rather than being there by design. i feel like we can point out things like "hey, x plotline mirrors a romance" without needing to necessarily say "tolkien intended this and meant to hide gay stuff in his works." like i'm just over needing that old man's permission or intent.

this has been the rambliest response yet and i hope it's entertaining/coherent lmao. thank you for your ask!!

#lena speaks #polutrope

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