#but it's also nice to be seen in a mainstream show that is loved by not just a queer audience but also a straight audience
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I find it fascinating to witness the straight audience of any media not being able to pick up what the makers of the movie/show puts down.
It’s like when people reacted to the “You wear fine things well” scene in Our Flag Means Death with “aw, they’re such good friends” whereas the queer audience went “omg, this is happening”. We all had access to the same scene, we’d all watched the build up to that scene but the straight audience wrongly read it as friends/straight whereas the queer audience had suspected they were building up to a romance but this was the confirmation. Even the creator of the show was baffled that people were surprised that Ed and Stede fell in love. Because he thought they had made it obvious.
And as I said, we, the queer audience picked up on it. And I feel like the same thing is happening with Ted Lasso. Do I know that Ted and Trent will get together? No, I am unfortunately not a writer on Ted Lasso. But you can’t deny that there are clues pointing to it. But the straight audience barely pick up the fact that Ted and Trent like each other, be that in a platonic way or romantic way. I’ve seen several reactions to the last episode of season 2 and ONE of them included the scene where Ted reacts to Trent not being in the press room. All of them severely cut down the scene in the parking lot. One of the scenes most of us Ted/Trent truthers point to as a huge piece of evidence for it going canon. The parallel of them meeting in an empty parking lot, just like Ted and his ex-wife and Roy and Keeley. But because Ted and Trent are both men it couldn’t possibly mean anything. And Ted has an ex-wife and a kid so he can’t possibly be into men, as if there is no such thing as being bisexual. “But I’m pretty sure Trent has a family, he has a kid right?” So? He could be divorced, we also have no idea if his daughter has another dad or a mum. And the same thing applies to him, it doesn’t mean he can’t be into men (take also into account all of James Lance’s interviews, and his choice of shirt in one of them, friend of Dorothy anyone? He's the captain of this ship, we're just along for the ride tbh.)
Then we have the wonderful “I’m so not homophobic, in fact, you are homophobic because you think Ted is gay just because he likes musicals and has ‘feminine’ traits” um no… it’s the fact that he kind of acts in a way that an ally wouldn't. Yeah, he called himself an ally in that one episode. But every single person who is now out as queer who at one point considered themselves an ally because "I’m not one of them but I sure think they're neat" raise a hand 🖐️ (been there, done that. Was very into queer things before I realised I myself am one of them). What it always comes down to is "it's pandering", "it's tokenism" (having the main character on the show be queer wouldn't be fucking tokenism), "not everything has to be gay", "why can't men just be friends, there is a severe lack of male friendships on tv". And like the last one makes me go??? There are a MILLION friendships between men on TV. There are even multiple friendships between men in Ted Lasso. Beard and Ted, Ted and Higgins, Ted and Roy, the himbos and so on. Having Ted and Trent become a couple wouldn't really change anything because there are still friendships between men. They also claim that Ted is needed as the "straight without toxic masculinity" representation. As if Beard isn't right there. The man who has no problem going to an immersive show about the menstrual cycle. Has no problem with shrieking when he's surprised and so on.
I also like that if we'd get Ted and Trent together, we'd get two middle aged queer dads. Which isn't that common. It's not even super common to see people realising they're queer late in life on TV, and yet it happens every day. Because let's face it, most queer men on TV kind of look like Colin, and I don't mean that as a bad thing. And I'm looking forward to his storyline. But it's also nice seeing middle aged or old people finding themselves and being allowed to be who they are (see Ed and Stede from OFMD). Also would enjoy seeing people lose their minds when they realise they've been fooled this entire time. It'll be like Black Sails all over again.
I do not have any doubts about the fact that, had Trent or Ted been a woman and they saw Trent give up his career because of Ted's influence, they sure as hell wouldn't protest people thinking they'd become a couple. But because it's two men it's just delusional for some reason (homophobia).
What I'm saying is, it's clear that the straight audience has a hard time picking up subtext and clues that the makers are planting. Because they've never had to do that. Because they are always clearly represented. They don't have to look for minor side characters and hope that they might be queer. Because the main character is straight and most of the supporting cast too. When you've grown up with a lack of representation or with representation that is meant to be subtext, you'll learn to pick up on it. And you do look at media differently. I just wish that the straight audience could listen to us for once, without getting defensive and dancing around the fact that they are uncomfortable relating to a character that turned out to be queer.
#tedependent#ted lasso#trent crimm#there are so many times where I'm watching something and I go... hold on that is... is that a queer character... yes it must be#and then they do something small that confirms it and I'm like I fucking knew it!#I have 0 gaydar in real life but when it comes to media I tend to pick up on it#I wish that all straight people would learn about the way queer people have been represented throughout history#so that they might be able to understand why we have to look for subtext even today#hell we got ''representation'' in star wars and beauty and the beast and it was blink and you'll miss it#and they wonder why we have to make everything gay??#because we want to be represented in a show that isn't strictly about being queer#yes it's nice with a ''everyone is queer'' kind of show#but it's also nice to be seen in a mainstream show that is loved by not just a queer audience but also a straight audience#nicole watches stuff
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fanfic/fandom ettiquite guide
Okay, I've seen some things recently that make me think there is some need to make a master post of some general fandom and fic ettiquite just because some people may not know and I think there's a huge wave of fanfic becoming more mainstream especially on apps like tiktok.
If you don't like it, don't engage with it!! I think this above all, is the golden rule of fandom. The internet is made for you to be able to mute, hide, and censor things you don't like. DO THAT! don't make a career off of hating things. This goes along with the three laws of fandom, which u should check out FIRST OF ALL.
DON'T GATEKEEP!! If you're posting about a fic, art, ANYTHING link it, credit it! Don't post a tiktok about a fic and then refuse to give the name. Not only are you failing to credit the creators of this content, but you're taking away from the fact that fandom is a COMMUNITY where content is meant for everyone.
Ao3 is an archive. You're going to see things you might not like or even find offensive or uncomfortable. But fanfic is not meant to be censored. Ao3 is made to be unfiltered, people can post anything and everything. Posting fics on other sites simply to shame their content not only brings MORE attention to it, but it's pointless. If you want a website that is censored go to wattpad. And of course, if you don't like it DON'T READ. You can filter your tags and warnings on ao3 so it won't show you that content.
Along those lines LEARN HOW TO USE AO3. There is no algorithm, it is not tiktok. You don't need to censor words in your tags. Your fics are not magically getting pushed out to people. Make sure you're using "person 1/person 2" for romantic relationships and "person 1 & person 2" for non-romantic relationships. Make sure things like non-con and underage are tagged under the warnings. AND AS A READER, know how to filter ships and tags to find the content you want. You can filter by kudos, certain tags, exclude certain relationships or characters etc. USE IT.
Do not create placeholder fics or other "non fics" on ao3. This is against their terms of service. You can (and probably will) be reported, this annoys people endlessly. We don't want to find a fic and open it to see "I haven't written this yet, sorry!" JUST SAVE A DRAFT OR DO IT IN A DOCUMENT? this seems like way to rack up hits, and it comes across as disingenuous, I don't see a real valid reason to make placeholders.
HOW TO WRITE AN ACCEPTABLE COMMENT: long is not important. A simple "loved this!" will make an author happy. DO NOT say any variation of "update pls?" regardless of how nice you think it is. Authors update when they can.I'm not the only author I've seen unhappy with this. JUST WAIT, either it will be updated or it won't, and either way you will live. If you have nothing nice to say about a fic?? MOVE ON. Don't leave a hate comment.
Do not rate or publicly shit on fanfic! A lot of authors know many people, and the chances of that author seeing whatever you're saying about their work is very high. If you don't like it, click off and read something else. If it's still living rent-free in your mind, that sounds like fan behavior to me. And there is no standard fics are supposed to meet, don't rate them.
Don't cross-post fics. Don't put fics on other sites, don't put translation on other sites. DON'T DO ANYTHING with a fic without checking with the author first. On that note, also don't post fics on GoodReads etc. unless an author explicitly says it's okay.
IF YOU DO NOT MARK YOUR BOOKMARKS AS PRIVATE AUTHORS CAN SEE THEM!! If you're going to say anything that isn't positive, you better mark that as private or better yet, move on. Don't say anything on a public bookmark you wouldn't want the author to read.
YOU CANNOT PROFIT OFF OF FANFIC, don't sell bound fics! Don't bind fics if the intention is to sell them. You're potentially creating a lawsuit for the authors of these fics and putting the existence of fanfic in danger. I've seen multiple authors debating taking fics down because of binding issues, just don't do it. AND IF YOU'RE BUYING BOUND FICS YOU'RE PART OF THE PROBLEM. it's selfish and I wish bad karma upon you.
You wouldn't think I'd have to say this but don't plagiarize or use AI to create fics/art etc. firstly making ai write something IS a form of plagiarism. bUT ALSO just write your own content. If you can't, then writing fics etc. is just not for you. No shame about it!
DON'T ASK AUTHORS TO BETA FOR YOU!! You wouldn't believe how many people have asked me to beta their fics for them, I AM NOT A BETA. I HAVE a beta because my proofreading skills are shit. If someone wants to beta they will offer, or go find a blog or somewhere where people are looking to beta. Like @needabeta You can even make a post asking around for a beta, but don't go bug your favorite authors to proofread your fics.
Really just don't harass authors. Of course, don't be afraid to send nice dms, asks, or comments if their inbox is open, but don't spam them especially if they don't reply. Respect boundaries! Don't send nasty anons, everyone knows this is a sign of jealousy and obsession. You're only succeeding in making yourself look bad. Ask yourself why is this author living rent-free in your mind, hm??
If you don't like a ship, stay away from the content geared towards that ship. There's no reason for you to be in people's inbox harassing them over a ship. It's never that deep. If you truly hate it so much, go consume the content for ships you DO like.
Stay grounded. This goes to both fic authors and readers alike. Hits and popularity are not the mark of a good fic. Getting a lot of hits doesn't mean it's good and NOT getting many doesn't mean it's bad. I'm tired of seeing tiktoks asking "so what's the next big fic?" WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE A "BIG FIC"? go look through the ao3 tag and find something you like to read, it doesn't have to be what everyone else is reading.
Headcanons are not law. People can think whatever they want about the characters. If you disagree with someone's hc, just move on... and just because a headcanon is popular, doesn't mean everyone has to abide by it. Be creative!
Don't treat artists and authors like celebs! We're all in this together! We're all losers who like the same characters and ships. Of course, compliment and be kind to all creators because we put a lot of time and effort into creating fan content for you all, but don't worship anyone. Don't treat them weirdly or make a post like "omg x followed me!" that's a bit weird. If you want to be excited, dm your friends and giggle together, but acting like authors and artists etc. are celebs only creates the room for people to stop seeing them as normal people and start acting rude or entitled. And many people are uncomfortable with it!!
TLDR; stop creating so much negativity in fandom spaces. At least in MY fandom it's just constantly shitting on ships, fics, art. It's hate anons, antis, and constant fighting about every headcanon. I'M TIRED OF IT! Learn to filter out content you don't want to see, and move on with your life instead of spreading more negativity.
If you have anything you think I should add shoot me a comment or an ask and I will add it! I'm sure I didn't get everything :) this mostly applies to my own experience being in the hp/marauders fandom for a good 10+ years, and I'm sure it varies slightly from fandom to fandom.
#fanfiction#fanfic#ao3#archive of our own#fandom#fandom culture#ao3 fanfic#ao3 writer#fanfic authors#ao3 author#fanfic readers#fanfic etiquette#fandom etiquette#fanfic rules#jegulus fanfic#jegulus#marauders#the marauders#marauders fandom#harry potter fanfiction
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Astro notes 🧜🏾♀️
I noticed Saturn in the 9th house might show signs of religious issues like maybe religious beliefs were pushed onto them when they were young and this made them dislike religion or feel uncomfortable with it. I have this placement and I hate when people start talking to me about religion. Especially to fix my problems like girl God isn't gonna fix my crippling depression...enough
This could also show signs of going to college late or not wanting to. Maybe being conservative? But I haven't seen that, quite the opposite surprisingly.
Jupiter in the first house come off as nerdy or like they know a lot or very ditzy maybe both.
I've noticed sag risings, degrees, or jupiter rising have eye problems.
Saturn in the 6th house like to go on diets or they just do for some reason. And they stick to it they take their health seriously probably work out often too.
Pisces venus/5th house love anything with romance, fantasy, magic and spiritual stuff like Crystals. Here's some recommendations for yall 😍
Caraval by Stephanie Garber I love this book SO MUCH just read all 3 books and her other series once upon a broken heart eats too
Idc imma put it here...The Selection series and I don't wanna hear no slander 🙅🏾♀️
Now you see me- the movie I just watched it and omg why is it so good !?
I think the 5th house talks about music taste along with venus. My sister has a sag venus and listens to music in Spanish she also has Uranus in her 5th house and listens to pop. And I'd say music that isn't mainstream she loves Rina Sawayama and Rosalia.
I have pisces venus in my 5th house and I listen to mostly pop-indie music. I'm a pop and rnb girlie. I don't listen to mainstream music really and I kinda write mainstream artists off sometimes. My favorite artists are probably tyler the creator and willow. I also don't really "stan" anyone I really just listen to whatever is good. I rarely stick to an artist or have a favorite. I listen to one or two songs by one artist usually then move on its rare for me to like most of their music. I noticed something similar with my sister.
I have lilith in the 11th house and tell me why damn near my whole grade hated me 😻🤭. It was mostly guys too and I also experienced cyber bullying.
Lilith in the 6th house might show issues with their health or body. I knew someone who has this placement and they have diabetes. But it could just mean being insecure about their body.
Lilith in the 11th house are the ones sending and getting n*des too like unsolicited pictures or sexual comments. Maybe they do s*x work online or thought of it. Anything negative or sexual that includes the internet. Omg this placement reminds me of Kat from Euphoria!! Damn no wonder I related to her 💀
Chiron in the 9th house might show religious trauma. This is the placement for people who grew up in the black church...iykyk.
Venus in the 2nd house have nice lips like plump and little with a prominent cupids bow. My sister has this placement and she has such cute lips!
Capricorn rising and Saturn aspects to the asc tend to be skinny the type to eat whatever and never gain weight. It could be an insecurity I have Saturn square my asc and I've always been insecure about being skinny. I've also noticed they can be tall or look tall. Basically the tall and lanky type.
8th house neptune/pisces idk but something with drugs. May become addicted to substances, die from them, die in mysterious ways.
I knew someone with their sun in the 12th house and they talked about not knowing themself and being a different person to fit in.
Gemini moons love to read but they might struggle to actually read because of their other interests.
Moon in the 8th house might be like their mom. They might look like their mom or just be similar. Just a theory but maybe it would be like that with other planets like sun in the 8th house might be like the father, venus might be like their partner, mercury like their sibling. But I'm not sure.
Leo, 5th house placements, or sun dominant might love yellow, gold, and stuff with the sun. I'm sun dominant and love gold and sun jewelry I kinda refuse to wear silver unless I have to 🤭.
Moon people might love silver I know a guy who had moon in his first house who loved silver.
Capricorn rising/Saturn rising might have something with their bones. I know a guy who is cancer rising with Saturn in his first house who talked about getting silver grills. He also had pointy knees 😭 and his teeth were sharp, fang like? And he talked about hating them. He was also tall (he was so fine chile 😩) but we must stay focused!
Gemini men will tell you anything chile...I was dating (this was middle school so I don't really claim him but anyway) this guy with a gemini venus. He told me he was into black girls (whole time he's racist) and ended up cheating on me with a white girl 😭. Now again this was middle school so take it with a grain of salt ig.
Idc what planets but having a lot of planets in the 4th house is usually not a good thing 😬. Most people with this I've noticed had a traumatic childhood.
#astro observations#zodiac signs#saturn placements#jupiter in the first house#4th house#astrology#Capricorn#leo#5th house#chiron#Lilith
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To the person who sent me an ask worrying about this article from Consequence TV maybe being the start of OFMD being cancelled, I accidentally deleted it so I'm responding here!
Tl;dr: absent any other information, I'm not worried about it. When I first saw it, it was paired with a headline that said somehting along the the lines of "Taika Waititi hints he won't be returning for OFMD season 3," which seems to have changed and just isn't actually said anywhere in the article itself.
The first part of the article is immediately a bit scary:
When Consequence asks writer/director/actor Taika Waititi if he’s feeling optimistic about a third season of Our Flag Means Death, his initial response is this: “Have you seen the end?”
While this looks scary, I encourage you to stop, breathe for a moment, read that again: crucially, that's not really an answer to the fucking question, and it's presented without context or even any indication that was TW's full answer. It's such a vague opener and without any follow-up it's practically meaningless.
The next parts of the article that a lot of people are concerned about are these paragraphs:
Max has yet to announce plans for a third season but Our Flag Means Death has become a fan favorite for its loving portrayal of its core relationship between Ed and Stede. For Waititi, though, the Season 2 finale “feels like a natural end to their story. Just because I feel like, you know, they’ve been through so much and then wind up in that nice place at a happy ending.”
Waititi calls Our Flag Means Death “a really special show,” adding that “I love the show so much and maybe it can survive without Rhys and I. Maybe, I don’t know. I do I think the character of Blackbeard is something I’m really proud of.”
Waititi says, though, that “I don’t want it to feel like Rambo III suddenly, you know, when you’re like, ‘Oh man, they have to leave their idyllic life again.'”
When I first read that headline, I was obviously like what the fuck, but when I clicked the link I immediately dismissed this whole article. I'm a person naturally given to anxiety and over-thinking - I'm not saying that to dismiss anyone who is worried about that, I'm saying that to emphasize just how contextless and clickbait-y this article is.
It's important to remember two things: OFMD is a mainstream property that is still generating a lot of traffic due to speculation on whether it's going to be renewed, and Taika Waititi, as a person, attracts a lot of divisive media attention that is often very clickbait-y in nature. He's also the biggest name attached to OFMD.
If we look at this article, all of TW's lines are presented to us out of context. We are not given the questions he was asked or told anything about when this interview took place (other than after the finale, obviously).
A breakdown of what TW says with possible, more likely context:
"The s2 finale felt like a natural, happy ending for Stede and Ed." This is true, and we also know this was intentional in case the show doesn't get renewed. This is not new information.
"Maybe the show can survive without Rhys and I." This is what people are (understandably) worried about, but this is both not a firm statement of "I don't want to come back for s3" and completely devoid of context. A possible explanation is that DJenks has mentioned possible spin-offs; TW could be here referring to spin-offs that don't involve him or Rhys Darby. As an executive producer, there is literally no way TW doesn't know at lesat the broad outline of DJenks' plan for s3.
"I don't want it to feel like they're leaving their idyllic life again." TW doesn't want Ed and Stede's story to be beaten to death, he wants it to have a satisfying, happy ending. Again, this should not be surprising information, it's just presented in a way that makes it seem like he definitely thinks s2 should be the end of Ed and Stede when that is not what he says.
This article is completely devoid of context, and because of that I consider all TW's statements in here to be essentially meaningless because we don't know any of the questions he was asked. I believe the most logical context for these quotations were him talking about the finale and how it was satisfying in case they didn't get s3, speculating about possible spin-offs, and then talking about how he doesn't want the story to be one of those TV shows that go on too long.
A bit of additional context: Consequence is, primarily, a music review and news site. They have a TV segment, where this article is housed, but music is their main focus and they are not a website where you expect to find actual breaking TV news, let alone from big names like TW. Larger film and TV publications we've seen covering the recent release of Next Goal Wins, in comparison, universely refer to the OFMD s2 as "successful" and refer to a "likely" third season - for publications actually focused on TV, the predominant view seems to be that OFMD is successful and a 3rd season seems very likely.
This article is very clickbait-y and tells us absolutely nothing. It absolutely does not say that TW is uninterested in returning for s3 (in fact, it says the opposite, he repeats again how much he loves the show) or that OFMD will be cancelled.
We're okay. Even if we do get news that OFMD hasn't been greenlit for s3, I promise it's not going to break on Consequence TV of all places.
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One last plug for this!
I'm recording my solo standup show at Edinburgh TOMORROW at 1.30pm!
It's a high-energy, uplifting comedy show full of gags - and it all secretly builds up to a big thing at the end. Very much a show for Tumblr. Disguised as a mainstream comedy show, but is actually a queer, neurodivergent and Welsh perspective on disability and self-diagnosis. Some poignant bits, but no sad bits! Just a love hour, and you'll have a nice time.
Ticket link:
It's a big room, so every ticket bought in advance will make a big difference to my peace of mind.
This show doesn’t invite reviewers. Instead, here are reviews from audiences who’ve seen the show:
Steffan Alun is the Welsh bisexual Russell Howard.
Funny, light-hearted, and clever (yet still accessible for a tired hungover brain).
I love the way his mind works. I just want to see everything Steffan ever does from now on.
He doesn't waste a single line. Incredibly impressive show.
So satisfying. And crammed full of gags.
Brings everyone along for the ride - a rollercoaster from start to finish.
Warm, inclusive comedy that never takes the piss out of the audience (unless you're an Englishman named Mark).
Every year, Steffan gets better and better.
I took a chance on a whim, and I'm so glad I did.
Hilarious, relatable, and kind. I've never seen a show like this.
Some shows make you laugh until you cry. Some shows take your breath away. Some shows make you feel better about the world. This show does all three.
The most comforting standup I've ever seen.
Unmissable. I always come see Steffan at the Fringe, and this is my favourite show yet.
Last minute decision to catch a show before the train home and so glad I did. Funny throughout and would definitely recommend.
Steffan made everyone laugh throughout. A great start to the morning.
A show packed with laughs but also a healthy amount of poignant self reflection. Exactly the vibe of comedy I needed. I hope I'm allowed to rate a show based on my judgement of him as a person? The support was also really funny. Will be recommending this to others.
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I just finished listening to K and J's podcast with Darren -- guys, it's so good. Even if you've stopped listening to the podcast, I would recommend this one.
Other than a few tidbits, there isn't anything fully new or ground breaking. But Darren is such a passionate person and such an engaging story teller that it's so captivating to hear him talk about things. I love when he gets into the weeds about music and you get a real understanding of everything they went into.
He is also so complementary of the show and everyone on the show and everyone who worked on the show. His joy about being a part of it really shines through.
(Could you imagine if /he/ did the glee recap podcast? lol)
But Kevin and Jenna clearly are very fond of him, and that's nice to hear, too.
As an aside - I was looking at instagram comments (why, idk, because I'm sadistic) and while 99% were positive, there were a few people who were being kind of a jerk about it - and I'm just amazed, because I'm not sure I've ever seen such negative feedback on any other guests. And most of it was related to not Darren, but to Blaine. And I'm like seriously? Seriously??
I also swear I'm banging my head against the wall every tie people get upset about Blaine cheating when every other single character on the show did the same thing. Gah. This is why I should stay away from the mainstream internet.
Anyway...
Darren is a delight, as he always with. I definitely recommend this one!
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Did you guys know that even all of Zootopia’s SIDE characters hit the theme right on target? All of them circumvent their species’ stereotypes, for good or for bad.
First one we’re introduced to is Gideon. He’s a fox, and he’s a bully, but Judy nails him right off the bat. He’s small-minded—actually, he’s just not very bright. He’s a bully, so immediately we know he solves problems with his physicality. But that’s the thing. Foxes are supposed to be sly and cunning and sneaky. There’s nothing sneaky or sly about Gideon.
He just shows up and mispronounces words and pushes bunnies around. In fact, Judy is the sly one in their interaction; even while he’s pushing her down, she’s slipping the tickets out of his pocket to give back to her sheep friend.
Okay so fine, Gideon’s obvious. But what about the next side characters we meet?
Clawhauser! Everybody loves Clawhauser. This one is obvious too. He’s a cheetah—he’s not a leopard, he’s not a jaguar. He’s a cheetah. But what do we learn about him as soon as he actually has to do something for his job?
HE’S NOT FAST. Cheetah’s are “supposed to be” fast, if they’re anything. But as many character traits as Clawhauser has (loves pop stars, loves donuts, loves his job, willing to help, all-around nice guy) the one that he SHOULD have, as both a police officer who’s job description could be “CATCH” bad guys, AND a cheetah, is speediness! But he’s not a runner. And he’s not even very quick on the uptake, either. When Judy is trying to solve a murder and has the evidence laid out right in front of him, and is LITERALLY connecting the dots out loud, he has no clue what she’s talking about. He’s not quick-thinking.
Okay let’s do the next one. Chief Bogo! This one is, I think, obvious too, but for funsies, let’s talk about it.
Chief Bogo’s whole character design, as a water buffalo, is supposed to be big, square, tough. He’s scarred up and masculine and authoritative and brusque. He even says several times that he doesn’t care about people’s feelings. But he is not big, heavy, and unyielding like a Cape buffalo should be. They’re literally described as “dark, brooding, tough,” animals. But Chief Bogo gets behind closed doors and he’s like:
“Ooo, an app where I can dance to mainstream pop music!” And on a more serious note, when Judy totally proves him WRONG and could be seen as having HUMILIATED HIM, he instead proudly walks her up to the Mayor’s office for a promotion. And he even consoles her and calls her a good cop when she’s at her lowest point.
Even the other fox in the movie, Finnick. His whole thing is that he looks small and cute; clever foxes like Nick take advantage of that expectation. Other animals clearly don’t realize that his species, which is totally different from Nick’s, is why he’s so little—they just assume he’s a baby red fox (to their disadvantage.) But even if they did, you see a Fennec Fox and you either go, “aw, cute,” or “foxy tricks!” Finnick has neither. The movie makes it seem like the scheming part of their lives is all Nick’s idea and Finnick is just there playing along to collect the money. He’s also not cute when the disguise comes off—he’s ferocious! A bust-heads first, ask questions later fox with no slyness.
Let’s move on to some even-lesser-known characters—I’ll try to go faster—
MAYOR LIONHEART! He’s supposed to be an animal associated with great leadership, pride, and honor, and the word “heart” is even in his name. But he has no real heart—he exploits everybody, Bellwhether and Judy included, for his own gain. He’s so self-protective and selfish, two non-leaderly traits, that he even exploits the poor sick feral Zootopians that they recover.
he doesn’t even seem to care about his actual mayoral duties, which is, you know, the hands-on LEADERSHIP part of being a leader that you’d think the King of the Jungle would be great at.
And what about Madge the Honey Badger? Many people don’t like that her role was made smaller after Pre-production and she became a barely-seen doctor character rather than one of Nick’s closest friends, but LOOK WHAT A GREAT JOB THEY DID. She’s a HONEY BADGER. Honey Badger don’t care. They’re just supposed to be these tough-as-nails, vicious littler buggers who not only have thick skin, but attack predators much larger than themselves—LIKE LIONS.
But the only time we see this Honey Badger, she definitely cares. She cares enough to sort-of suggest that they get outside help for the sick animals Lionheart is hiding, but when he yells at her? Does this Honey Badger use her thick skin to stand up to him and make a stand for justice? No! She cowers and backs down. And she must have been doing it for weeks, too, because the Missing Mammals have clearly been there for a while.
What about Mr. Big? Clearly it’s all in the name; he’s implied to be a huge threat, very dangerous, but he’s little, sure. Not only that though—he’s implied to be ruthless, a killer, even Nick is scared of him. But instead, he winds up being warm and fatherly toward his own daughter and Judy. He gives wisdom, and helps justice more than once. Also, by the way, a Shrew’s brain is supposed to get even smaller in the winter to conserve energy. There are articles online called “how winter makes shrews stupid,” when I looked it up. But is Mr. Big stupid? Absolutely not.
What are others known for? Being cute and playful. How many times do you see Mrs. Otterton OR FERAL MR. OTTERTON being cute or playful in the film? This has less to do with their personalities, but the point is, we’re seeing an animal known for it’s cheerful and fun demeanor only in sad or scary situations in this masterpiece of a movie. Not to mention the fact that Emmett Otterton, a “sweet little otter” is basically never sweet until the very end of the movie.
Yax the Yak is supposed to be big, slow, dumb—he even has hair covering his face, as if he’s not all that observant. But who remembers every little detail about his interactions with Emmett Otterton? Even when Nangi, an elephant who is supposed to remember according to stereotypes, remembers nothing, ever?
YAX DOES. And not only does he remember, but he remembers about interesting things, like being able to tell by the sound of a car which cylinder is firing incorrectly. He’s smart.
We also have Mr. Manchas, the panther, who is shown to be less an apex predator (which is what panthers are) and more a traumatized, suspicious, mild-mannered driver. Oh, and he and all the big, stronger animals work for the tiny little shrew, remember that too.
Sheep are also supposed to be followers, and stupid. They’re supposed to go toddling after one another, and sometimes just straight up walk over the side of cliffs to their deaths out of idiocy. But the only sheep we see in this film, BESIDES Bellwhether, are not only rebels trying to undermine Zootopia’s whole system, but smart.
Doug, Jesse, and Woolter are all lab geniuses cooking up government-toppling terrorism serums.
Gazelle, also, by the way, is a gazelle. They don’t stand up to anyone or anything in the wild; they run away from problems and conflict with other species. Yet here she is, not only being a graceful dancer, but spearheading peace rally’s and speaking out against conflict.
And of course, Flash. He’s slow physically when he’s at the DMV, but it’s implied that he’s no dummy—for all we know, he was helping Nick stall. Because at the end we learn he’s sort of a criminal, too—because he loves to do what ladies and gentlemen? SPEED.
So. What I’m saying is, there’s a REASON Zootopia’s so good—it just keeps smashing the theme out of the park with every single character that comes onscreen. They don’t stop at Nick being helpful at heart instead of selfish, or Judy being a clever detective instead of dumb. This movie’s a masterpiece right down to the most basic characters.
#Zootopia#nick Wilde#Judy hopps#judy#nick#nic and judy#hopps#wilde#disney#nick and judy#judy and nick#nicholas p. Wilde#chief bogo#officer hopps#bellwhether#mayor lionheart#Finnick fox#clawhauser#meta#analysis
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-> -> -> 2AL playlist drop!
Answered all the music related asks under the cut!
Question reference btw!
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@teainthesnow
4 - a lyric you like
"Triangles are my favorite shape" From Tessellate by Alt-J !! Do I know why? Nah. I just also like triangles :)
11 - a popular song you think is Good, Actually
On Time by The Disco Biscuits !! Its not popular more than it is mainstream? Its one of those songs you swear you have heard everywhere, because its very much played everywhere, but like its actually good! Either its played everywhere or it just gives me loads of nostalgia? Eh whatever, its still good and im bestowing it upon you.
13 - a playlist name without context
"To Enter The Beyond" Past Human City Soundtrack
18 - a song or lyric that reminds you of the asker
Oh this for sure belongs on your AMW playlist!! Gives some absolute Tea vibes!
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@dandywonderous
5 - ramble about a song
FORGIVENESS BY ALICE GLASS!!!!!!! OUGHOUGHOGH I LOVE THIS SONG WITH ALL MY HEART god something about it just vibrates my insides and tickles my eyes. I dont know how to describe it other than each time I hear this song I feel nothing but pure power and hopelessness at the same time. Drifting along in never ending darkness, and the only thing you have with you are the spirits and memories of those who have passed. The spirits call for freedom. You should listen to them. This song gets real for me alright?
7 - a song for which you like a cover more than the original
Not really a cover moreso than it is a remix!? But im counting it! Silk by Giselle, the original, somber and sweet but just sorta missing something you know? This remix by Favored Nations though? SLAPS. Its so upbeat and I am so here for it!
11 - a popular song you think is Good, Actually
Honestly literally anything by Electric Light Orchestra. Though to be more specific, Evil Woman!! Alright is also a good one, but less popular!
16 - do you sing or play any instruments?
No instruments here! I actually have one really nice/complex song memorized that I can do on the piano but unfortunately thats about it whoops~ As for singing apparently I actually sing good when I try!?
23 - a song you remember liking as a kid
You are going to laugh at this one. Actually. I still like it. But damn was I a weird kid. I once had a solid 150 digits of pi memorized because I would just play this stupid song on loop for like a whole ass hour every now and then???? I think I still have about 50 memorized thanks to this song.. whoopsies
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@thimbell
5 - ramble about a song
YESSSSS YESSSSS I GET TO RAMBLE ABOUT ANOTHER SONG The World Is Ending by Matt and Kim !!!!!!!!!!!!! good GOD this song is so dear to me. Not because of the song really, but because of what the song means to me? The connections I have too it?????? Longish story short, someone made a killer AMV using it? The AMV using clips from the show Final Space! No clue if you have seen the show but no matter. Final Space is definitely up there as one of my favorite shows, not only because its good but because it actually helped me get closer with my dad, we watched it together! In other words I associate this song with just so much joy. The AMV if you were curious btw!
14 - an unpopular music opinion
Glass Animals is overrated <3 <3 Dont get me wrong I love their music! It just gets so tiresome hearing them everywhere!??? Probably just a me problem though
24 - a song people often misinterpret
I dont think I have much an answer for this one, apologies! Mostly because its not too often I pay attention to lyrics, and even then I think its cool that everyone has their own interpretations of someones song!
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@wraenata
17 - a song that has made you cry
... honestly? Any song in a tv show that is played during a sad scene! A REALLY sad scene... one that comes to mind is Enter One by Sol Seppy (would recommend skipping to about 2:30), because it is played in the death scene of one of my all time favorite characters... alright im going to weep about that death scene more now because listening to this again is NOT helping pfft... oughh honestly now im tempted to add it to the 2AL playlist... maybe.
24 - a song people often misinterpret
Answered above!
30 - a song that makes you nostalgic
Divinity by Porter Robinson, listen this used to be my favorite song for the longest time... and it might even still be my favorite song?? Either way, I DARE not listen to it anymore for the sake of I fear for the day where this absolutely nostalgic gem gets tiresome for me...
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@unfortunate-songbird
17 - a song that has made you cry
Answered this one above! Though for a less serious answer, any of the finale songs in Centaurworld... oops.
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1 - which artist(s) have you listened to the most lately?
The Asteroids Galaxy Tour has been a fav in the past month! Heres a good song by them if you would like~
I am going to use this ask as a chance to also say how much I love Hugo Kant!! He makes great stuff to chill too when working! If I could log hours on youtube, my most listened to videos are so just listening to the guy live!
21 - favourite album
Not to pull out my inner cowboy, but Harlequin Dream by Boy & Bear. I fear for the day I get sick of this album its such a trip for me!
28 - rank the songs in an album
THATS IT IM RANKING ALL THE SONGS IN PAGANS IN VEGAS BY METRIC. I love this album.
#1 - Celebrate. This is the song that introduced me to the band and gives me SUCH a blast of nostalgia each listen, and it shows. Best song in the album by far. Its so weird though since I knew this song before I knew about the rest of the album, so when I finally discovered the whole album each time this song comes up its so out of place pfft! Still such a bop though!
#2 - Blind Valentine. This is just one of those songs I love singing too whenever it comes on alright!?????
#3 - Lie Lie Lie. This is the first song in the whole album, and honestly? What a knee slapping way to start an album too god damn!!!!
#4 - Cascades. I am begging you to skip to about 3:15 in this song, its a little on the plain end before that end, but THAT ENDING??????? SLAYS.
#5 - Too Bad, So Sad. ITS SO GRINDY I LOVE IT. I FEEL LIKE A PUNK IN A DESERTED WASTELAND
#6 - For Kicks. The beat is just so unique here!!!!!!???????
#7 - The Face Part |. Just some funky cool down beats at the end of the album that are very enjoyable!
#8 - Fortunes. A decent enough second song in the album, helps sets the tone for whats coming!
#9 - The Shade. Its actually a good song, just nothing special about it you know??
#10 - The Governess. vibes are there, the vibes are sure there
#11 - The Face Part ||. Just more cool off tunes to end the album with
#12 - Other Side. No. Why are you here. your ass does NOT fit with the rest of this god-tier album. goodbye.
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Edit: @kiaxet Thought I should add you to the masterpost here!!
5 - ramble about a song
Ok. Adventure Time by Yoann Turpin. I am usually not too big on 16 bit video game sort of vibes but this??? Is such a MASSIVE exception. Holy????? THE HEART THE GUY PUT INTO THIS SONG MAN. The beat is just so unique, its impossible to try and guess whats going to happen in the song next, you strait up feel like you are on an ADVENTURE. I am so here for this song, god and its so upbeat I am in LOVE.
By the way, I linked the whole ass album because the whole album overall is so nice to listen to to pump you up when doing dishes or something lmaooooo, the first song in the album is also an amazing trip!!
8 - an artist you think underrated
HUGO KANT!!! God!!! mentioned above as well, I love Hugo Kant with a passion! He makes such good stuff just to chill too, and him live is absolutely incredible!
With the ask above I linked a video from him preforming live, so this time around I bring you two favorite albums of mine!! Far From Home and Out Of Time
I get in SUCH a zone listening to his stuff!
9 - a song you think is underrated
Phleps by C418!!! C418, the producer of the original music behind minecraft, but the guy has so much underrated personal music that is SO underrated! This song in particular, is vastly different from his usually stuff and I love it for that. Definitely underrated for being overshadowed by his work on minecraft and his work that isnt minecraft but sounds like minecraft..
29 - what do you look for in a song or artist?
I always look for something where you can tell it has genuine love and heart put into it! That + something that just sounds truly unique in its own right!
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The Pride of June: Aromantic
Todays art piece (bottom) was created by @zedleaked. Please go check out their blog and show support!
Scroll to the bottom for a message from our Tumblr User!
The Aromantic Flag is the Flag used to describe someone who experiences little to no romantic attraction. This IS NOT the same as asexual. Someone who is Aromantic can still feel the desire to have sexual relationships.
Fun History Fact: They first recorded use of the word Aromantic was said as joke by someone trying to explain they have no desire to be in a relationship
Tumblr User: @zedleaked, and @boilinghotsoupandcrackers (who is aroace)
Media characters: Lilith Clawthrone from The Owl House is aroace, Peridot from Steven Universe is aroace, Percival King from Epithet Erased is asexual and implied aromantic, Howie Honeyglow from Epithet Erased is aroace, Kusuo Saiki from the Disastrous Life of Saiki K is aroace. Unfortunately, aromantic people are very underrepresented and aroace representation in general is very limited. It can be seen that there aren’t any characters in media yet that are alloaro [people who can feel sexual attraction but not romantic attraction] which is a little unfortunate, we can only hope by spreading awareness about aromanticism that one day we may be represented more in media. (Written by @zedleaked)
Why the colors? Green and light green represents the aromantic spectrum, White represents platonic love and friendships, and Gray and black represents the spectrum of different sexualities
Where can I find the calendar? The calendar is my pinned post on my blog @hecateisalesbian! This will be occurring all throughout June, and tags such as #The Pride of June and #PoJ Project can be used to find my post
Special Message
”What does being aromantic mean: Aromantic is an umbrella term for people who do not feel romantic attraction or do not feel it most of the time. Romantic attraction is the desire to have a romantic interaction with another and potentially be in a romantic relationship with another. Aromantic people can be asexual at the same time or can just be standalone aromantic.
Fun history fact: The term aromantic started being used in 2005. There was an aromantic community formed on the AVEN: The Asexual Visibility & Education Network which was a community centred around asexuality. Guess these two really do go hand in hand!
Personal Experience: To break the professional language for a sec, figuring out whether you are aromantic or not is hard, especially if you are not asexual as well. When I was figuring myself out I often found that I never really developed crushes on others and that made me feel weird since romance is so mainstream and talked about and for some reason I don’t feel these weird butterflies in my stomach or something? I guess I’m just weirdo! Sure, I can find people attractive and cute but I didn’t feel that romantic feeling. As a kid I would try and just scan other kids in my class to try and figure out if they’d be a good partner. I didn’t know that there had to be some kind of feeling to get in a relationship with someone. I just thought people would go ‘hey this person is nice and cute, I will be their partner!’ but that’s definitely not how it works. I would find it hard to differentiate romantic and platonic love because I mean… love is love…? I mean some would say romantic love is doing stuff like cuddling, holding hands, kissing, hugging… but you can also do that platonically, right? There’s just that extra step in romantic love that I just can’t see because I can’t experience that extra step. There are moments where I think I feel love but I realise that at the time I was just really eager to be their friend as I get very excited when meeting someone like me but if I really thought about if I would be in a romantic relationship with that person… the answer would probably be no. Some aromantics can feel lonely as they can’t feel romantic love and they don’t have the desire to devote their life to a person, but remember that you still have those platonic relationships and they can be just as strong if not stronger than romantic ones, nothing is better than hanging out with a really awesome friend. If you believe you’re on the aromantic spectrum but are unsure, try doing some research for yourself as there are many terms under the umbrella that may fit you! Demiromantic for example is when you only feel romantic love when close to someone or grey-romantic is when you feel fluctuating levels of romantic love but as a whole barely experience it”.
#Aromantic#aromantic#aroace#The Pride of June#The pride of June project#PoJ Project#Queer#lgbtqia#pride month
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Recent Austen adaptations yelling
Ok I DID make this blog to review historical-set Pride & Prejudice adaptations (with an exception made for iconic B&P). But for everyone who was DEFINITELY WONDERING, yes I have also been storing away a lot of opinions about other recent Austen adaptations that I Must Tell Someone.
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Fire island (2022)
A modern gay party cheesy rom-com P&P that genuinely made me laugh. Having seen some other (whiter) cheesy gay romcoms that were extreeeemely PG & playing it safe, I was pleasantly surprised.
Also Bowen Yang and his story just came across really earnest in a way I was into - would watch this man cry again, 10/10.
Personally as an extremely disabled british nerd (now tragically unable to travel and/or go to the club...) this gay scene is a long way from my queer scene. But I still had emotions, you know?
Kinda wanted more of the Mary analogue and generally just normal looking people (almost everyone is so ripped) but I appreciate that's how beautiful smooth people often look in mainstream american films, we can't have everything.
DARCY WATCH: I do not want to dress like this adaptation's chinos Mr Darcy. But Conrad Ricamora was generally great and very hot and awkward and understood the assignment. Good ice cream throw.
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Emma (2020)
I know I know, it's pretty... but I don't think that's enough!!!!!
Lovely production, beautiful costumes, a candy wes-anderson cinematography that really suits the story, and it's fun to notice references to actual outfits and prints from the time but lads. LADS. UNPOPULAR OPINION TIME: Where is the chemistry???
You can’t make Mr Knightley a nice sweet boy (so funny to have cast a posh folksy singing man) and leave the plot the same and expect it to work!! Also I was personally pissed off that a lot of the promo/ ads for this made it look like ~forbidden love~ when it's the 2 richest white people in town getting together?? ? There's actually not even a class difference in this one, guys.
Basically this romance was nothing to me!!! I felt nothing!!!!!!!! WHERE'S THE DEPTH
I did like the bit where he lies down though. Relatable.
Also why are you drawing so much attention to the servants when you don’t seem to have anything to say about class...? 'Wow look how many servants they had! Anyway, they don't get any speaking lines'... it's 2020 guys!!! like what are we saying here. 'isn't it cool to think about how people were rich'??
kind of the point of Emma (character) is she's pretty superficial, but the story does not, in fact, have to be
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Persuasion (2022)
Weeping softly into a pillow........ did you know this version meant a version with Sarah Snook and Joel Fry got cancelled?? we could have had it all
(standing on a table yelling) THE MODERNISATION WAS NOT THE PROBLEM WITH THIS FILM!!!
Honestly I actively liked all the entire secondary cast in this. Louisa and Mary were extremely charming fun takes to watch. ('I'm an empath' IS right for the character if you're doing modern jokes!!!) And nobody can deny this was a correct and powerful use of Richard E Grant.
Henry Golding was naturally great. Apparently he got offered the lead and took the villain instead, which DOES mean the villain is super charming and fun to watch which is... hard to match and.... kind of shows up.... the main man.
It's been said before but the main two were WOEFUL imo. I have no beef with the actors I just question the DIRECTION and whether anyone making this knew (or cared) why people... enjoy things.
Book Anne is the quietest gentlest loser and I LOVE HER and so does basically every Austen nerd. Making her a quirky wine-bath girl who's honestly just cruel sometimes fully stops the main romance chemistry and plot from working.
And it means the main boy is still like 'god I'm so horny for how KIND AND CAPABLE YOU ARE' which is just 100% no longer true. You can't transplant a personality in a romance but leave the plot the exact same and expect it to work. The chemistry IS the plot in a romance..........
you can't act morally superior to your siblings and still rate people out of ten.... also so funny to me that everyone else gets period outfits and hair whereas this protagonist looks like she just glanced at a picture of any time in the past and grabbed a couple shirts from primark. it doen't even look good or build character!!!!!
Anyway, not to be an elderly man like 'ohhh why does nobody care about character these days' but the reason something like Clueless works is because it has the heart of the story right, instead of just copying the surface level stuff.
#making all of these a single post which probably means nobody will reblog it ever. OH WELL#emma 2020#persuasion 2022#fire island#austen adaptations#full disclosure yes I was midway through making a queer regency romance GN whose plot is partly based on emma and p&p when i saw 2020 emma#so YES.......... i have strong opinions... possibly UNPOPULAR ONES..........#anyway if you enjoy the things i'm complaining about more power to you. I'M TOO BORING tO ENJOY THEM UNFORTUNATELY
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The majority of people who like Eddie are the same people who make alignment chart meme jokes having never even read 1 page of a dnd corebook and have no idea that the idea of order vs chaos/that whole chart is literally ripped straight from the pages of the Elric saga.
They’re the people who, when they hear “the white wolf”, they think of Geralt (Netflix edition) with no idea that the first truly famous usage of that was elric of melniboné in the 60s-70s to the point where the company white wolf publishing (makers of the trpg series world of darkness which they also don’t know about) got their fucking name from Elric. There’s even talk of Geralt being Kinda Plagiarizismy in regards to Elric. Literally all of Valyria in asoiaf/got/hotd? Elric of Melniboné.
These are the people who’ve likely never heard of Elvira or Vampira or Vampirella. They’ve never heard of Swamp Thing, if we’re lucky they know about Constantine/Hellblazer from the shitty DC shows. They’ll never read the original comics of Watchmen or The Sandman. They have no idea who Alan Moore is or that he literally does ritual magick. They don’t even know what that is. They have no idea what was in issues of Heavy Metal or how impactful it was. They’ve got no idea who Conan the Barbarian is outside of a vague pop cultural figure and a saying. They’ve never read the Silmarillion, they’ve only seen the movies and probably only the theatrical releases and only a handful of times or their entire lives at best. They’ve never even heard of The Young Ones. They’re people who gush about the MCU and how he’d love it “because he’s a nerd” as if he wouldn’t have been the biggest hater from day one because he read the comics. They’ve never seen a Hammer or Universal horror movie and if they did they’d think they were dumb. They’ve never seen The Munsters or the OG 60s Addams Family.
And they will not fucking shut up about an Eddie who doesn’t exist. An Eddie who would like and respect them. Who is kind and funny and quirky always. Who they can treat like their little blorbo meow meow darling and will only be as nerdy as is interesting and acceptable to them. Who bats his pretty cow eyes at them and calls them cute names. Who gives up dealing or only deals weed. Who’ll listen to their music and like their things while putting away the majority of his own. Who’ll never mock them or look down on them or their interests no matter how much he should given his past behavior— which also doesn’t exist in this fake Eddie. There is no interest in learning about the things that act as his building blocks, no interest in anything but his looks and the idea of a metalhead/nerd boyfriend.
Except I can guarantee if they actually met him they wouldn’t like him, wouldn’t respect his interests and would talk down to him. And Eddie would not be as nice as they think he is, nor would he want to know them or respect their interests since they’re generally “mainstream”. If you like Taylor Swift— he WILL not respect you AT ALL. Like I get it— y’all want a manic pixie dream boy and you chose him. But don’t think I will not be throwing rocks at you the entire time you shit down the neck of things I care about to do it.
#train.txt#DNDJSLKDMCMC WHOOPS I WENT OFC AGAIN#the sub culture rage when the mainstream gets a hold of your shit and can’t even be assed to LEARN about#like the ppl who got metallica merch bc of eddie but then were ‘noooooooooooo!! mEtiLliCa Is PrObLeMaTiC!?!?😭’#drink bleach immediately thanks#I’m already fighting for my life against all the neonazis white supremacists and misogynists in half of the comms I’m in#I don’t have time for dumbfucks who want a seat at the table but bitch about every meal
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To answer your Byler question: it’s about the slow burn of it all and about the audience that the story will reach. I don’t really know what you mean by “with gay rep the way it is now” because the state of gay rep rn is just two characters getting together after a few episodes of no buildup. Regardless of Will and Mike being white (which I’m going to assume is what you’re getting at), there are very few modern gay stories out there that spend this long on a slow build and the careful construction of a seasons-long sexuality arc. That is what would make Byler so unique if it ever becomes canon, compounded by the fact that ST is the most mainstream of mainstream shows. This isn’t Heartstopper or Schitt’s Creek or another gay show whose audience is limited because it’s targeted specifically to gay people — Everyone and their mother watches it, and that means that everyone will end up witnessing Byler’s story if it happens. That is what would make this special and groundbreaking.
Of course, no one should be dismissing the importance of Robin as a character on her own, and lesbophobes claiming that Robin and Vickie mean nothing is unfair, but your point about it being the other way around (aka Byler meaning nothing Vickie and Robin as a couple) doesn’t make any sense, as Rovickie has had barely had 5 minutes of screen time together compared to the way Byler has been built up since S1. Even Robin and Nancy got more screen time than them, hence Rovickie’s complete lack of popularity. Stranger Things had the opportunity to make Vickie important in s4 and chose not to do it. It’s no different than any other show, where as you said, the wlw couple is just in the background. It’s nice that ST included a love interest for Robin, but it would have been more meaningful if she was actually a character in her own right.
(And Robin and Vickie are also white, btw.)
okay.
first, i would like you to watch more gay shows, because from the sounds of it you are not very well versed. but that’s okay!
second, i mentioned will and mike are white because while there are a lot of white mlm ships around nowadays, that number obviously drops with gay characters of colour, and i wanted to be clear i was taking that into consideration.
third, and i presume this is where our opinions majorly differ, i don’t think will’s sexuality arc has been handled as well as it could have been. and i think if the majority of the audience is unable to recognise that mike is going through a sexuality arc, then byler won’t be recognised as a slowburn anyway.
fourth, other shows have been popular and included gay characters and couples. and people are already calling stranger things a “gay show” because they have one lesbian and one gay character. though i think it’s very sweet that you think people, at the bare minimum, watching byler happen will make byler groundbreaking. a ship isn’t groundbreaking just because it’s been seen by a certain amount of people.
now, you seem… riled by my comparison of rockie to byler lmao. i think you misunderstood my tags. so i suppose there’s a few things to address with this too lol.
so. i very very much so doubt byler has been built from s1, because the duffers didn’t plan past s1. we were never going to see those characters again. the duffers are largely making this shit up as they go along.
a lot of bylers i’ve seen on tumblr seem to have this… obsession with making stranger things the mike and will show, and it just isn’t. and i think they’re doing a disservice to the characters and the ship by imagining this importance.
and i don’t think rockie not having a main part is a bad thing. i want my gay characters to exist past their sexuality. rockie isn’t groundbreaking! so many ships have come before it lmao. but it doesn’t need to be groundbreaking. i’m okay with vickie being introduced this season as her love interest, and robin having a life and arc outside of vickie. that’s how most side romances go. that’s what happened with dustin and suzie! if vickie receives no time at all in s5 and rockie end up together off screen, then yes, obviously i’ll be annoyed at the lack of time given to them. but that’s a problem for future me.
my point was rockie having their moment, and dating, and us watching it throughout s5 would mean more to me than byler happening. not that everyone shouldn’t care about byler rep lmao.
(and i know rockie are white, babe, but wlw shows are being cancelled regardless of if they’re both white)
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youtube
Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc
The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!
#ACLA24#ACLA24HighSchoolStudents#youtube#youtube video#climate leaders#climate solutions#climate action#climate and environment#climate#climate change#climate and health#climate blog#climate justice#climate news#weather and climate#environmental news#environment#environmental awareness#environment and health#environmental#environmental issues#environmental education#environmental justice#environmental protection#environmental health#high school students#high school#youth#youth of america#school
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i just binged the whole new season of heartstopper so spoiler warning for below if you haven't watched it yet but...
oh my GOD. like oh my fucking GOD.
first of all, Elle. i love that they don't show her as just the bullied trans girl with no other personality than just that she was bullied. like what i mean is that they let her just be a regular teenaged girl. she's not just The Trans One she's just one of the crew but they're still open about her transness. and i feel like they could've made her relationship with tao about how cishet men are pressured to not date trans girls cuz people think it makes them gay, but that isn't even brought up, their relationship is just natural and genuine and it just is so so so nice to see a mainstream show letting a trans girl just be.... herself. a teenager. they're not denying what she's been through but they're also not making her whole story out to be a tragedy. and when she meets naomi and phoenix, and immediately bonds and naomi immediately opens up about her experiences as a fellow trans girl, i felt sooooooo seen because that's what queer friendships are like. they're so healing because you can just feel safer and that's what most of my queer friendships have been and i felt so seen in the way elle immediately bonded with them.
second of all, ISAAC. HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLY FUCK!!!!!!! i have never once heard the words aromantic or asexual spoken out loud by someone else. like literally never spoken outloud, i've never even said them to myself, and here they are being spoken about casually on a huge mainstream queer tv show. that person at the art show talking about the pressure of romance and sex and how finding the right labels after so long was so freeing was like- idk how to even describe how it feels to be seen like that for the first time. like, people are going to watch that and they're going to learn about people like me in a positive way!! and i love that Isaac started reading the ACE book and i can't wait for more on his journey to accepting that part of himself
third of all, darcy and tara. as a gendernonconforming lesbian myself, seeing her so happy to wear that suit and then the very real pain of having that shut down by her mom, was very good to see that be represented. it's not just about her lesbianism, it's about her gender presentation too and so many times, lesbian media focuses solely on femme-presenting lesbians (not even actual femmes mind you, just lesbians who look feminine as fuck) and it felt so happy to see darcy dancing around in that suit when she first put it on. and tara talking about how she was afraid to even call herself a lesbian for so long was so real like. there's such a stigma around that word, i still feel that way even though i know i'm lesbian, i feel like this show is one of the first shows i've watched that isn't just a gay show, it's truly a queer show because there's such a diversity of experiences represented like-
there's charlie's experiences being bullied, but also his experiences being loved and appreciated. there's nick's experiences being perceived as straight and having to feel like he has to choose, and also constantly having to tell people he's bi, not gay, but also the positives of euphoria from his attraction to both men and women, the reality of mixed reactions from family. there's elle's parents who are accepting of her transness, and her school who wasn't as much, but also her school showcasing trans artists and her cis girl friends who accept her without question. there's isaac being told by jake that he just "hasn't found the right person yet" but also being told at the art exposition that it's freeing to be relieved from the pressures of romance and sex when you don't feel those kinds of attraction. there's just so much room for nuance and balance of experiences and they're all part of the picture. like, actual good representation.
i'm just so happy right now.
#🌌written in the stars ; asks🌌#heartstopper#heartstopper season 2#heartstopper spoilers#aroace#aromantic#asexual#queer media#queer representation
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The TTRPGs I played in 2023: Part 2
Near the end of November, I asked for recommendations on one page TTRPGs I should play for a event I ran. The goal was to play a TTRPG for about 40-50 minutes before swapping to something new. While I sadly didn't get around to playing all of the recommendations, I still appreciate all of the games people showed me. Reading new game is something I enjoy doing, so I still had fun even if they didn't make it to the table.
Before I go into each TTRPG individually, there was a common running theme between playing all of the games that I feel like I should say. As much as I enjoy the concept and writing one page and other extremely small TTRPGs, I will admit that playing them was a rough experience. Working with that small amount of mechanics and concepts was something me and the table were not used to and I'm not sure if these kind of games are something I will play more of later. Whenever I got excited by a mechanic is one of these games, I always felt like I wanted something more. I think these types of games are great thought experiments for game design, but I can understand why these type of games haven't gotten much traction in the mainstream (with a few exceptions). However, don't let my thoughts discourage you from writing these type of games. I still love making them because its a fun challenge to see how much content you can cram into such a small space. This was something that most of these games did fairly well, so lets move onto that. If you want to check out any of these games or their authors, I have everything linked on this post.
Rollers of the Lost Artifact by JayBlnk6
This was the starting game and it left a good first impression. In this game players are archeologists looking for special artifacts. The simple skill system was nice, but what I really loved was the inventory system. Each item size has a certain shape and you have to fit it into a 3x3 square. I always love inventory systems that force you to play a Tetris (turning a mundane thing into something fun), and this game did a good job fitting it into a smaller system. Since we were playing multiple games at once, the players didn't get to sell the artifact, but I still appreciate the rules where players get a choice on what they wish to do with it.
Rats in Space by Jay Writes
I think the title of this game explains itself. The players are rats in space looking for a special piece of cheese. The theming of this game was a lot of fun to play with. The morale system was also an interesting addition to the d6 system I've seen a lot of one page games (including my own) use. It was fun to see the players start to panic as their moral system got lower because of a large streak of bad rolls. I also really liked the d6 table for determining one last consequence when the cheese is found. The players thought they finally found it, but then realized they had one last obstacle to conquer (that being the horrible smell in the room).
Rough Beginnings by @tornioduva
This was the most unique game I played that night and despite some odd moments, I had a lot of fun with it! The players are simple group of adventurers, but there is a small element of mystery to it. They each have a secret personality trait and one of them is secretly try to sabotage the rest of the group. I love the creative ideas this game had, but it was a bit of an awkward play. In order for the adventurers to escape, the GM needs to roll a 9 from a 2d6 on the scenario table. The first round, I rolled a 9 for the first scenario. The second round, I rolled a 9 after the players went through about 15 scenarios, the majority of them being the players getting HP for succeeding. I love the concept of this game and I think it inspired me to make my own deception based TTRPG, but it was rather clunky. I have no issue with that at the end of the day. I love playing games that take risks and try new things!
By String and Song by @efangamez
I've enjoyed participating in game jams run and reading some games by efangamez before, so when somebody at the game community mentioned one of their one page games but couldn't remember the name, I knew where to find it. While the game they were recommending was Barbaria, I ultimately ended up going with this game because bards seemed like more fun to play and most of the games in this series seemed like they were reskins of each other. I feel kind of bad saying this, but the game just felt like one page D&D 5e. It's a d20 game which seems to be rare for one page TTRPGs and the way everything was written with Skill Checks and attacking seemed to invoke that game. I guess if you wanted to introduce smaller games to people who have only played D&D I guess this could be a good starting point, but I think most people would just ask to go back to D&D. If I had to guess, most of my negative feelings about this game likely come from me just being burnt out of D&D. It was written well and the enemy descriptions were flavorful, but I don't ever see myself going back to play this.
Honey Heist by gshowitt
Whenever I hear one page TTRPGs discussed, this game always seems to be recommended. After playing it, I can see why. The concept of being normal bears trying to break into a convention was already an instant sell. I loved the idea of the balance of trying to keep your bear and criminal parts from not taking over. It was one of the most interesting ideas for a fail state I've seen in a game. This the game we played for the least amount of time because it was near the end of the meeting and we were all tired, but the random animal chaos mixed in with surprisingly intricate criminal planning made for a fun mix.
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i'm not sure i have strong enough words to express just how bad it is for everyone on the planet in every possible way it is that christians are using the name of a god who became a man who humbled himself to the point of being killed by people after and during a lifetime of showing and teaching how to turn power structures on their head--just to have power over people. like, the more you understand the gospel the more you realise there are no words to describe how opposite of it what is currently happening with every self-proclaimed christian who is wanting, let alone actually expressing and getting away with taking power over another human made lovingly in the image of God. i don't know if you realise how bad it is.
it's bad for those people (well OBVIOUSLY) because their hearts aren't soft and ready to listen to God and fear is ruling and they don't know God's love, not truly, they're not able to love others, not when they think love involves wielding any power over them. it's bad for them because they are leading little ones astray. that is bad because--and you can interpret this in different ways depending on your theology of how universal salvation is and whether you believe in eternal punishment--Jesus literally says if you do that it's better to be drowned in the sea with a boulder tied to your neck. that's what they're threatened with and they're so far gone they don't realise that they might just be the ones leading the little ones astray. and how do you even get to that place? that you're so arrogant and not at all self aware? this is why it's bad for them. they just go further and further down that path.
it's bad for anyone impacted by it, obviously, oppression helps no one and also--what comfort can you offer?? i don't know how to express how doubly worse it is when christianity is presented and has been for millennia a hope for those who are oppressed now. a theology telling them they are valued when the world doesn't. a hope of an eternity of freedom and no suffering and getting to hang out with God and not have to be 'below' any classes of human just straight up dignified. a theology that when those who are 'above' them get ahold of it, they have a tendency to let them be freed or at least be a lot nicer and more respectful. how can we hold out that hope to anyone on the planet right now, when it's in the same name as something that has caused oppression for centuries? how can we let them decide if they want to choose it, how can it ever seem real to anyone, when you've got this mainstream narrative of what being a christian is, and it sucks?
and it's bad for every single christian who may not be directly oppressed by it. who might not be oppressed by anyone because they're seen as 'good' for believing the right things and they know how to be nice people and live out the gospel in ways that ordinary humans can--why is it bad? because for millennia christians have been just ordinary people who have gotten through incredible things because of hope for something that's bigger than themselves. i'm not talking about personal salvation here; i truly don't believe it can ever be the same motivator as the fact that we have a God who believes in righting injustice and who cares for every single one of us and when people start talking about him, captives get freed, people get dignity, there's a little bit more equality. and if some suffer still, they at least get the hope of an eternity where we have to deal with none of this.
but the eternity we're painted a picture of is the opposite. it's where the privileged oppressor gets to never experience pain again just because they said some words and believed some things and the hundreds of people they have driven away from being able to choose the same thing don't matter. an eternity where there is no justice, only the idea that every sin is the same and deserves mortal punishment but if you happen to be one of the few who gets taught the right things you get out of it, yippee. it's an elites club who are supposedly chosen by God to have no consequences for the way they have lived lives carelessly, tom and daisy from the great gatsby style or even worse. no consequences for the people they have killed and not thought about even offering the idea of this bliss after death to, after they took all the bliss they had in life. no consequences for how they drove person after person away from this hope through their own behaviour. no consequences for how they twisted the words of an ACTUAL GOD to mean the opposite. no, because Jesus died for them.
THIS IS THE COMPLETE OPPOSITE OF WHAT THE MESSAGE OF THE GOSPEL IS, AND ALWAYS HAS BEEN.
the message of the gospel is that the ways you've messed up, you can take that pressure off yourself and feel the love of a god who was willing to hang out with you and die for your sake. you can love others with that same love too, watch as they let go of the pressure as well. pressure to be a certain class of society, because all are valuable under God. pressure to please people. pressure to believe what someone else believes. pressure to be perfect. pressure to convert people ???? (like. who even added that one?) pressure to appear good. pressure to perform. all of these things. and be caught up in a wave of something that is inevitable: when people feel this kind of freedom, it's always going to catch on and spread and the source of it is going to go viral. we all want and need that. it's simple.
but then you have the people who are meant to be stewarding the source of this peace, now unable to feel it for themselves. now adding on themselves and each other all the pressures described above. now the gospel means nothing. now it's a tool used to oppress. now it drives a colonialism that robs those that have been reached out to supposedly so they could feel the same peace. now it drives weapons and wars and campaigns twisting science so taking someone's choices away somehow equals protecting them from sinning (??) as if it's not driving them away from the very thing they need, should they choose to embrace it.
i genuinely don't know how we're not all mad. but i do, and it's been a strategic game of turning the best qualities of people who want to submit to a god who loved us so much, against truth. against justice. against taking a stand. and it's happened for centuries; so long that it's become the norm that people want to 'conserve'. and i know i have a stronger sensitivity to injustice than most. but the point is that this is wrong is a fact so glaringly obvious that anyone coming in from the outside can see it. can see what's being presented is so opposite what is written in the book waved around to justify all that is being presented. and then if you're used to it you might try to explain it away. to extend grace to those who may have unknowingly perpetrated it, while ignoring all of the damage control that needs to be done that there simply aren't enough people who see through the bullshit to do.
but the gospel is also about justice. and you seek refuge from what doesn't work, find more progressive christian spaces, and when you start to question things like eternal conscious torment you might start to forget this a little. the premise of why a god would die being that humans are capable of this. humans are capable of taking something so good and using it for things so bad. so bad that nothing done by humans is going to fix it. because humans can't undo death. that's kind of the point right? and all this, everything i've described, taking away hope and a concept of equity in eternity if not now for so many is literally that bad. that Jesus had to die. something drastic had to be done to fix it. and sure, question what you've been taught on hell. but don't think that God doesn't care about this huge injustice that is being committed in his name. why aren't these people scared? that their faith isn't being proven, quite the opposite, by their works? why don't we warn them?
and in answer to that i think that they actually are scared. i think that was their problem all along, they were scared of losing power, scared of losing God, that they had to go above and beyond in such twisted ways to make sure they were in, they were better than others, and it made them so scared that they had no room left in their heads to realise, actually, the only thing they had to be scared of was losing the hope they were shown so that fear might take over in cruel, self-preservational ways and they might drag others away with them. and when that happens, that is when, yes, what they're scared of can happen. they can lose God. and they already think that it's going to be bad. but they don't even realise the extent of what they've done.
whatever befalls oppressors is up to God. may he have mercy, but have greater mercy on those who have been impacted by these fear-power-control spirals which weren't of their own making. may he have the mercy to give a humanity the tools to undo all the bits and pieces of hurt and generational trauma that get people going down this path to begin with, tools that begin at the very humanification and death and resurrection of a god who loves us. and may he hurry up. because even if you don't freak out every time a person on this planet dies and there's a possibility they'll go to hell (try not to go down that path if you're not there, nothing good comes of it and you'll just be stressed all the time) there are people being driven away from hope by people turning it into the opposite constantly. even if you're far away from the West, the minute you try to find authorities on christianity you get exposed to this and no one taught you how to be wary of power did they? no one taught any of us. that's what led us to be complicit in this for so long.
and i'm sick of screaming at closed ears. i'm sick of people saying it's not quite so bad or 'just the americans' or thinking queer acceptance might solve every problem in the church. we need to go deeper than that. question the very foundations we're built on, do they line up with what we say we believe, or what is the most effective way to get rid of ideologies and habits we don't need? we mightn't need to cut off physical hands and eyes but we need to know when to be brutal with ourselves as a community or we're never going to heal. we need solid theology that drives us from the very heart to live like it. i'm sick of arguing back an forth if a singular action is permissible or not (when did we even learn to view things so black and white?) when we need to go back to our roots; our mission.
i still believe it all lines up. the weird things we might choose to do to show our God is good, with our lives. the pattern of the powerful and cruel and careless and power-hungry with their power being shot down by God in order that liberation might occur, both in our bigger social systems and in our own hearts. i still believe that from abraham and right down to Jesus there's a hope that's going to rock the world in good ways and it's going to have no racial profile to it but it's going to be a hope for anyone who is oppressed and a kind call to work against oppression in yourself and outside for those who are not. i still believe it's not a white thing. not a thing you need to abandon your culture and its rich history and mythology for, but a straight up hope that can motivate us to love others in ways that we'd burn out from doing otherwise.
but right now we are getting burnt out. because how can I ever feel a part of something with the very people who are causing harm or are at the very lease unwilling to call it out? how can i ever rejoice in the hope i have when it seems like things are going the opposite way? how can I ever relax around anyone when i'm either doing damage control when i share my faith or i'm trying desperately to reconcile the horror i'm seeing with people who genuinely have no idea that a religion could do so much harm. and that's the thing. it couldn't do so much harm if it were not used so oppositely to what it's supposed to be. and i don't know if there's anyone else who has to see this so constantly. to try and escape with other things but it always comes back. in the way i'm desperate for justice. for kindness and equity to prevail. clinging to a belief that no one seems to see the same way that I do.
#thinking of blazing my own post bc i'm proud of this#and so glad to finally (randomly) get it all out#and i think i only wrote a swear word once#christianity#punk christianity#evangelical#religion#religious trauma#ministry#ministry burnout#nothing else does it quite the same way#colonialism#decolonise#please if you're reading this and you're in the same boat message me. we need to be friends#otherwise this is christianity in a nutshell i guess. don't believe the haters
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Always and Forever - 2
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Fem Reader
Warnings: Angst, Fluff, Sexual content, minors do not interact
word count: 2301
~*~
PART 2
Y/n put Malcolm in the baby seat, fastening the belt she kissed on his cheek. She’d been crazy busy throughout the month managing and planning the Fall collection showcase. It was Wanda’s first time launching her collection in a mainstream fashion industry.
Wanda Maximoff- cheerful, quick witted, intelligent and extremely protective of Y/n and Malcolm, was the step- sister who was also a best friend to Y/n. Wanda was just like her mother, warm and welcoming, full of love and compassion. She found a sibling and a friend in Y/n. Wanda was allowed with Y/n in labor room and she was the first one taking Malcolm in her arms before doctors took him away for mother and baby skin to skin contact.
“You good, baby?” Y/n asked, looking at Malcolm in the rear view.
“Yes Mama. When reach Wan Wan?” Malcolm asked mouth full of flavored yogurt.
“In few minutes, Mal. You will have to spend some time with Lily, while Mama’s gonna finish her work. Okay baby?”
“How wong work Mama?”
“It’s going to take time Mal, but mama will come see you okay? Be nice to Lily please.”
“Okay mama, wuv you.”
“I love you too Mal, so so much.”
The house of blues Boston was illuminated with lights, sound of music blaring from the speakers. Y/n parked the car in the parking spot. She was little late already, taking out Malcolm she hold his right hand in her left while carrying his bag and her purse in right hand she walked into the place. She spotted Lily not so far from the changing rooms, she handed Malcolm to her along with his bag. A kiss and few reminders later, she was walking into the main room where all the models were getting ready. She glanced over checking everything and headed towards the bar section of this huge place. She knew bar was the only place she’d find Wanda and Pepper. Both of them had this nervous habit to have few beers before the show.
“My god! Get a grip you two.” Y/n exclaimed taking a seat beside Wanda. “I’m the one walking down the ramp.” She signaled the bar tender for a drink.
“I am so excited. You know I’ve designed the dress especially for you. You’re gonna be the sexiest mama tonight.” Wanda squealed from happiness.
“Aha, I’ve seen that dress and it’s all kind of sexy, Y/n.” Pepper said gulping down the beer.
Y/n rolled her eyes as she took a sip from her whiskey. Only reason she agreed to walk the ramp was Wanda. She just couldn’t say no to her.
“I’m sure that guy from the HR will lose his balls.” Wanda laughed out loud. “You are going to be sensational Y/n/n.”
“C’mon guys! We need to stay focused. Pepper, is your husband coming?” Y/n asked changing the subject.
“You mean my ex- husband?”
“No, I mean your husband because you’re still not divorced yet.”
“Ugghhh….. I don’t know.” Pepper groaned.
“We have booked the most expensive place in Boston. Tony’s presence will attract the media and we need media’s attention other than the sponsored coverage.” Y/n checked something in her phone. They stood up and headed towards the changing rooms where all the models were.
The show was to start in thirty minutes and everything was meticulously organized, all credit to Y/n, she was the driving force behind the whole showcase.
Wanda took out the dress wrapped in a plastic bag and handed to Y/n. “Open it.” Wanda said with a smile. As Y/n unzip the bag to have a look at the dress, her eyes went wide in astonishment.
“Oh.my.god!!! this is so beautiful….” She exclaimed in joy.
It was a floor length evening gown in maroon color. It had spaghetti strap with deep neck and backless back with a side slit. It was the sexiest most prestigious dress Y/n had seen in her entire life. Wanda had outdone herself with yet another masterpiece that it was and she made it especially for her. Y/n felt tears in her eyes, she was overwhelmed by the gesture and it wasn’t the first time. Wanda hugged her tight seeing her sister’s red eyes.
“Hey c’mon Y/n/n…” she whispered. “I want the world to know that my sister is the hottest mama out there.” Both of them laughed heartily in each others embrace.
Pepper awed from behind and ushered Y/n in the changing rooms to get ready. While Y/n was inside the changing room, Wanda called Bucky. Her fiancé, her one great love.
“Where are you?” Wanda asked through the call.
“Right behind you.” She felt an arm around her waist and a warm breath against her ear. She turned around in his arms and smiled sweetly at him. Bucky leaned in to kiss her softly.
“I missed you.” He said into the kiss. Wanda laughed, “You saw me this morning.”
“It’s been nine hours, love.” He tried to steal another kiss but Pepper came in from behind.
“C’mon guys! I’m gonna take your girl away, you can take the seat Bucky in the hall. The show will start in twenty minutes. Where is everyone…” Pepper’s nerves started to appear, Wanda laughed and shooed Bucky off towards the main hall. Everything had been in perfect order, Y/n’s hard work was evident in the every minor detail. She had a team of equally brilliant and capable people but it was her meticulous nature that outshined everything and everyone.
~*~
Steve parked his car in the parking lot. The House of Blues Boston was lighted up and people from the fashion industry were started pouring in. He made his entrance from the main door. He had been trying to call Pepper’s assistant but couldn’t reach the person. He walked along the corridor praising all the work that had been done. He entered the main hall, the security needed to see the pass that Steve didn’t have, instead he showed them his business card and Tony’s reference. In a second, he was escorted to the VIP section of the hall where only officials were allowed. He was there for barely ten minutes when Pepper came in, dispiriting that Tony wasn’t here. Steve’s austere demeanor and Tony’s absence put Pepper in a bad mood. She excused herself immediately not wanting to engage in any courtesy.
As the fashion show ushered in, Steve was bored to death. Bucky told him he was busy with some work thing so they planned to meet next day. He wanted to get out of there and was almost at the exit when the announcement for the show stopper occurred and Steve stopped in his tracks.
Y/n Carter….
Was he hallucinating?
No…
He wasn’t even drunk.
Was she his Y/n?
He walked back few steps in and forgot to breathe. In the spotlight Y/n was walking elegantly in a beautiful evening gown, accentuating her curves perfectly. Her boobs were little fuller now, everything about her radiates class, charisma and majestic. She was looking exquisite, her smile was the same as he remembered, maybe even more beautiful. She was still the most stunning woman in Steve’s eyes. He wanted to run to her, took her in his arms and kiss her senseless. He wanted to sit in her feet and begged for forgiveness. He simply wanted to feel her and see if she was even real.
A sound of loud applause brought Steve out of his misery. He shifted on his feet, unable to take a step in Y/n’s direction. While Wanda was speaking to a number of designers and media people, a young woman came to Y/n and whispered something in her ear and it took her a minute to excuse herself from the sea of people to went on a separate way where only staff was allowed. Steve tried to follow her, with heels on Y/n was walking in quite a speed. Steve kept walking behind her at a distance where she wouldn’t know someone’s presence. She crossed the corridor and entered in the open area.
“Mama you back.” Malcolm squealed and ran towards her. Y/n easily crouched down and took him in her arms.
Steve froze when he saw Y/n holding a little kid in her arms. He felt like his heart would stop beating and he'd die in suffocation.
Had she moved on?
He clearly heard the kid calling her mama, did that mean she got married and had a baby? Steve wanted the earth to swallow him alive. He'd never been in such pain like he was right now. The idea of her with another man, having a family was a slow painfull death for him. In that moment, he needed his Ma, so that he could cry in her embrace. He wanted her to wake him up from this nightmare. He was struggling to breathe when from a distance he heard something he wasn't ready to hear.
"Mama, i's daddy, see daddy." Malcolm had seen Steve and now he was pointing towards him. Wriggled out of Y/n's hold he ran towards Steve.
“He… photo daddy, mama.” Malcolm wriggled out of Y/n’s arms and ran towards Steve. Steve didn’t realize that he came right into the view of the little kid. Steve saw him coming towards him.
Why was this kid running towards him? Steve thought and looked behind to see if there was someone but there wasn’t anyone except for him, Y/n and Malcolm.
“Daddy…” Malcolm came to stop right before the very eyes of him. Looking like an angel, his face was full of innocence and happiness. Steve felt a harrowing pain in his heart. This little kid has the same blue eyes just as his own. The dark blonde silky hair, same nose and same lips, the little boy was the exact replica of him and Steve left with no doubt but to believe that Malcolm was his. His baby, his blood, his son. And then there was this radiant smile on his baby’s face that he inherited from his mama. The same smile Steve fell in love with, Y/n’s cheerful smile was one of the many things he got enthralled with. He hunkered down and hold Malcolm in his arms, nuzzling his face in little boy’s neck. He knew he’d scare the little boy away if he cry too much but it was like he didn’t have control over his emotions.
“I’m sorry… I’m sorry…. I’m sorry….” He kept chanting in Malcolm’s neck.
“Why cwy, daddy?” Malcolm tried to break his grip. “Why sad?”
Steve didn’t say anything. He couldn’t say anything, he just looked in Y/n’s direction and saw her looking straight into his eyes.
Her eyes were dispassionate….
Y/n was aghasted when Malcolm squirmed out of her arms and ran towards what he thought was his dad. She had shown him his dad’s pictures. She was so angry at Steve but she couldn’t take away Malcolm’s right to know his father. All her life, she had missed her dad’s presence while growing up so she knew both parents are equally important for a child. She only got to meet her dad on occasions or ceremonies, her mother Eleanor had a full custody of her and Peggy. When she turned sixteen, Steve took her to meet her dad for the first time in years and ever since that she made it a routine to visit him every other weekend. After graduating high school, she even attended her dad’s wedding.
When Malcolm turned one, she started showing him Steve’s pictures so he would know his father. She couldn’t let her anger, heartbreak and pain be the reason to snatch her son’s right to know his father. So when she turned around and saw Steve, she felt betrayed all over again. She wanted to slap him on the face but then she saw Steve red and tear-stricken face. He was holding Malcolm like his life was dependent on the very hold of his arms around their son. She took robotic steps in Steve’s direction, her heart was breaking in every step. The events of the night she left New York City were flashing before her eyes.
“You want jevvy beans, daddy?” Y/n saw Malcolm cupping his dad’s face in his small hands.
“Daddy, no cwy. Daddy bwave boy.” Malcolm kissed Steve’s forehead.
“Malcolm…” Y/n called.
“Mama, why Daddy Cwying? Why sad?”
“I don’t know, sweetheart.” Her tone was colder than she intended when she said, “He must have done something wrong.”
Steve stood up, his eyes were red and puffy. He had grown a beard, Y/n noticed. He was still very handsome like she knew all those years ago but the bags underneath his eyes were new.
“Why did you hide my son from me?” rage was seething through Steve’s voice.
“Excuse me?” Y/n scoffed.
“My son knows who you are, isn’t that enough for you?”
Steve was dumb founded for a moment, anger he felt for a bit was dissipated in air. It was hard for him to believe the person standing before him was Y/n, full of bitterness and bizarreness. She was the same Y/n he fell in love with. Hell, he was still very much in love with her now even more if that was even possible. She was the mother of his child, a child he had met moments ago. He was swamped with emotions. He enveloped her in his arms in a bone crushing hug.
“I’ve missed you, Y/n/n…. I’ve missed you so much.”
Moments later, Y/n got herself freed from Steve’s tight embrace, without letting Malcolm notice. She was shaken as much as Steve was but both of them were going through different emotions. While Y/n was feeling dismal and betrayed, Steve was hopeful to fix what he had destroyed.
#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers au#steve rogers angst#steve rogers fluff#steve rogers smut#dad steve rogers
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