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heyitsyn · 3 years

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MANAGER!SEIJOH AU

a/n: this is kind of an au like what if you were

for more seijoh content, check this masterlist out!

anon:

- 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i would like to request a seijoh!manager reader who’s a first year and is siblings with ushi and the team’s reaction to finding out that she was supposed to go to shiratorizawa with ushi and their reaction with her getting along with the shiratorizawa volleyball team and maybe the manager is a small cute soft little energetic ball of sunshine 🥺🥺 also hewwo, hope youre doing well! ☺️ -🎷🐛

- Ir seijoh manager series is so gooood. Can we get something where by some weird reason yn-chan is close to ushijima and tendou and the seijoh boys dont know about it and how they'd react to her being so affectionate w them ahahwindkdn

EVERYONE SHUT UP AND LOOK AT HOW FREAKING PRETTY TENDOU IS LIKE AKLFDJLASKFJDLSKFJDSFLKD

okayokayokay

so this is a what if thing

like what if ushijima was your older brother

SLKFDJADFLIJSDKLDF I CAN ALREADY IMAGINE OIKAWA SCREAMING

you didnt exactly have the best relationship with your mom

you remember when you were younger that she used to yell at your brother for using his left hand and you got angry a lot because you were fiercely protective of your brother

this caused her to yell at you too for being nosy and being involved in something you shouldnt be in

duh we know that ushi’s dad takashi actually supported him for this and protected him too and you were also a papa’s girl so you always ran to him

he understood you both better and while your mother worked, he was at home taking care of you two

then when they mentioned wanting to separate, you were very sad but somewhat relieved

mostly because you hated hearing your parents arguing and you felt bad for your brother as he constantly did whatever to get you out of the house

thats what brought on your love for volleyball

you werent exactly the best player but you were interested in it and often watched matches with him

but you also liked volleyball because your brother liked it

you liked whatever your brother liked

he adored you too and he was a boy who didnt talk much due to your mother but he was always a talker with you

especially when you couldnt sleep, he would sneak you out of your room and you both would run to the kitchen and eat ice cream

even with just a 2 year age difference, he looked as if he was older than you due to his massive height

‘just wait nii-chan! i will drink enough milk to reach your height!’

*insert lenny face*

AKLDJFSLDKFJDF I HATE MYSELF

CAN I PLEASE DIE

however

when they divorced, you thought your father would take both you and ushi

like the lady at the court even asked you where you wanted to go and not a breath of hesitation you chose your father

you weren’t very concerned because you knew your brother was going to choose your dad as you both were closer to him

so imagine your surprise when he said he didnt care and naturally, the mother would get the child

lowkey you felt hella betrayed and when your dad whisked you away overseas, there was this grudge you held against toshi

yall youre like 5

i would be hella mad too if my brother chose the person who yells at him all the time

in california, your father made sure you still remembered your brother and you tried to detach from the japanese lifestyle to your new one but you just couldnt

maybe around 6 years you were already fed up with the hot california heat and you wanted to go back to japan to see toshi again

you got over that grudge years ago but your mother refused to have any contact or anything to do with your father and so that included you too

she refused to let you both video chat and any type of connection

your dad obviously noticed your sad expressions and your obvious longing to go back to your brother again and so he arranged something

you shut the door gently before taking off your shoes by the doorway

the large house was often quiet except for the constant typing of a keyboard in your father’s study

‘tadaima’

you meekly mumbled but his sense of hearing never wavered so he heard your voice

‘oh? y/n?’

his voice echoed through the hallways and you heard his chair squeak as it was moved back so he could stand

your sock-cladded feet padded against the hard wood floor and you walked towards his study where indeed he was standing there

your father has definitely aged yet his job as a coach made him as fit as he was decades ago

as much as it disgusted you, you could tell what your friends meant when they said your dad was good-looking

they actually said your dad was hot but you refuse to acknowledge that

you and your friends are like 12 tf

you closed the door and sat down on the loveseat at the corner of the room as it was your designated spot

‘hey, papa’

you greeted with a smile and he gave you the same grin

‘i ordered f/f (favorite food) for dinner tonight so try and listen for the bell to ring, okay?’

you nodded

there was bit of small talk and you asked about his team while he asked about school and you both arranged to hang out over the weekend at some ice cream shop

the conversation dragged on until you heard the doorbell and you ran to the door to answer the delivery man

your dad put out the plates on the table and you excitedly dug in

‘also, you remember your grandmother? and her terrible back?’

oh god of course you did

they lived about 30 minutes away from your house in japan and she constantly worried your father bc the woman was approaching 90 and was still picking peppers!

with old coach ukai

‘what did she do now?’

your father chuckled at the exasperation in your voice

‘she misses you. says something about the family’s princess needing to go back to her country or something’

there was a smile in your face

your grandmother was your favorite and she always said you were the princess

she hated your mother because of how insensitive she was so she only acknowledged you as the only other female in the family

obviously your brother was also liked but there was just a special bond between you and your grandmother

‘so when are we going back?’

you asked and it was clear that you were excited at the thought of going back to japan as you havent been back since you moved due to your father’s busy job and your school

takashi swallowed his food before revealing the news

‘actually, if you want, you could finish your schooling there. but only until college first though because your old man needs you over here too’

nah bro you didnt even care about the last part

literally your fork fell to the table and you shrieked

‘WHAT?! SERIOUSLY?!’

and thus brought you back to japan

you stayed with your grandmother on your dad’s side and you quickly got accustomed back to japan life

your BROTHER!

okay

so waka-chan def heard you coming back

your mother was grumbling about it the other day and he was sure he heard your name in there

‘sdkfjkdslfjdkslfj y/n dkfjlsdkfjldkf’

LMAO THATS ME TRYING TO SAY THAT WAKA COULDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT SHE SAID SINCE SHE WAS MUMBLING SHE WASNT KEYBOARD SMASHING LMAO

there was a mutual giddiness in there too and he was excited to see you again after many years without contact

however

there was a bit of fear in there that thought back to when you were younger and his choice of not really having a specific parent despite your pleads to stay together with him

but he was going to make sure your bond was still intact!

he would do anything in his power to do so!

when you arrived

your dad accompanied you back to japan and you both were walking out to the exit of the airport when you saw your grandmother excitedly waving a sign around

in bold sparkly letters, it said ‘USHIJIMA’

okay wait i love grandma usui

you quickly ran over to her and she grasped you into her arms

‘nana’

you sobbed and she hugged you tightly

‘im so happy youre back home’

your father shook hands with the friend she brought to help drive you guys back home

old man ukai was basically the chauffeur but hes really good friends with your nana so it was okay

the entire ride you guys basically caught up with each other and you couldnt help but laugh whenever your dad would go on a rant about your grandma being too reckless and your nana defending herself

‘oh stop it, takashi. i was only given one life and if it’s over, it’s over. for now, ill live it how i see fit!’

your old family home was exactly as you remember it but you didnt expect the 6′2 boy in the living room

‘nii-chan’

you meekly whispered and he let out a soft smile before opening his big arms

you ran into them and he held you tightly

‘i missed you. so much’

he whispered and you nodded

it was def such a nice thing to have your brother again

oooo your dad been knew that you would be sticking to waka like you did when you were itty bitty young

so when you practically begged waka to stay at your nana’s house the entire summer, he couldnt refuse you

duh your mom went to see you but you just quietly sat there and smiled at her

polite but distant

due to being around waka so much, you naturally went to his volleyball practices and their training camp

there

you met his friends and you guys quickly got acquainted especially with tendo bc he was just so fun

and he was your brother’s boyfriend best friend

the others were still kinda distant with you ahem ahem im looking at you shirabu

but they were mostly amazed at how powerful the genetics played in your appearances because wowza you were beautiful

lmao dont let waka hear them say that bc they would be benched all season in a single snap

during training camp, you usually sat at the sides or you would be their stand-in manager

goshiki absolutely LOVES you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GOSHIKI MY SON MY BABY

him and you were the same age so there was an easier way of being friends and your energies just matched so well

he would run up to you whenever he got a play right and you would ruffle his hair affectionately

LADKSJFLDSKFS FLASHBACK TO TENDO!SISTER X GOSHIKI

‘y/n-chan!’

hell even ushi was getting annoyed at goshiki’s constant need for you

tendo would steal you away and he would be giggling to you about how adorable you were and you just giggled along bc wow this beautiful man is really talking to me right now

ALKSDJFLKSF CAN YOU TELL IM ALSO A TENDOODOO SIMP?

‘cmere, y/n-chan. i taught toshi this the other day and he was very impressed and wanted me to do it again. okay so it goes in a rhyme, ya ready?’

you nodded along and he shot you a close-eyed smile before starting to draw on the dirt with a stick

‘there once was a man with-’

lets just say

you were definitely your brother’s sister

sometimes though

you would try and go towards the calmer players to get away from the rowdiness from baby daddy tendo and baby goshiki

you would find them at the gym just doing drills and at the sight of you, they would turn red but continue playing

they didnt really mind seeing you there bc youve always been such a positive energy and cheered them on which gave them strength

‘NICE ONE OHIRA-SAN!’

‘WAHHH SO COOL YAMAYAMA-SAN!’

you were like a cute ball of serotonin >o<

‘wah, of course its expected for you guys to be the top in the prefecture. youre like,,,,, silent but deadly~!’

duh a compliment from a girl?

dead

shirabu’s bangs would get in the way of his vision sometimes yall i will never stop making fun of that ridiculously adorable haircut so you would use a clip and tuck it away for him

this big babie is so awkward that he turns red when you whisper in his ear that you were done

semisemi baby and you got along bc you guys had a similar taste in music and because you lived in california, he was fascinated that you were in the music capital of america

‘did you see celebrities down the street?’

he asked you excitedly one day during lunch

you stopped then smiled softly

‘semisemi-kun, i didnt live at that part of california’

nah to him, america is just filled with celebrities

OH DEAR BABY BOY KAWANISHI

taichi is a generally quiet guy

like you thought he was actually selectively mute when you first met him

but you gradually got him to talk and you would help him whenever he would want to practice

usually it was during the ungodly hours of the morning

you woke up and went to grab a drink from the common room but you noticed his large build exiting the door so you followed him into the gym

‘kawanishi-san?’

you called out and felt guilty when he jumped

‘oh, hey’

he aknowledged

‘wha-’

you stopped to yawn causing your eyes to close making you miss the brief second of softness that flashed in his eyes

‘what are you doing?’

you tiredly asked

taichi dusted off his trackpants after kneeling down to rummage through his bag and you couldnt help but gawk at his height

‘im training early’

he answered

‘why? is it because you want to keep up with the others?’

you mumbled and he was surprised for a second but reverted back to his stoic expression

‘i have to make sure i am able to reach my seniors level for next year’

taichi turned away to grab a stray ball and you moved to go to the storage room for the ball cart

‘oi, what are you doing? go back to bed’

he said from the other side of the gym but you just looked back at him with a tired grin

‘meh, i want to spend time with you, senpai’

you reasoned

he shook his head before walking over to you then ruffled your hair

‘no wonder youre so tiny. you dont sleep enough and let your body grow’

yep that was the closest youve gotten to taichi joking with you

usually, hes training and when hes in the zone, nothing else has his attention but the ball

maybe thats why the others ahem goshiki has said that he was very scary

his game face was practically a mean face

basically you spent the entire training camp with them and then soon, you were going back to school

duh everyone hmm maybe not shirabu bc he most definitely read the school book of rules thought you would be going to shiratorizawa with them

but you broke the news to them one afternoon and imagine the tears from both tendo and goshiki

‘WHHYYYY!!!!’

‘NOOO!!!!!’

‘why can’t you?’

semi asked and you were about to answer when shirabu beat you to it

‘the school doesnt allow late transfers’

oh right

the american school system was set in a different schedule than a japanese school system

it was considered the summer for them yet school already started a few months ago

since shiratorizawa was a very academically and physically prestigious school, they refused anyone who would potentially be late or behind their curriculum

‘so where ya headed to then, chibi?’

tendou pouted and you leaned against his arm

‘hmm some school named aoba johsai? i dont know its near my grannie’s so that’s all that mattered’

oh dear

USHIJIMA NO Y/N WILL NOT ASK TOORU TO GO TO SHIRATORIZAWA

they consider seijoh a rival bc theyve played against them practically in every prefecture tournament and they were worried for that infamous setter

‘ne, y/n-chan, promise us that you won’t be swept away by them! especially a guy named oikawa tooru!’

uhhh

well

tendou’s warning was kinda ignored bc you ended up being seijoh’s manager

hehe

surprise?

but they weren’t really really shocked tho bc they knew you liked volleyball so you would naturally be in the volleyball team

even as a manager

meanwhile in seijohhh

OooOOOoOoOooooo sEiJOOhHHHH~~~~~~

okay so you were actually registered under your father’s last name usui rather than the ushijima last name

therefore you werent exactly immediately known as HEY! USHIJIMA’S SISTER!

you still became the manager the way you did as mentioned in part 1

and you still are their adorable baby manager

you were aware of their oikawa’s hatred for wakawaka so you try not to talk about him even though youre literally the closest person to him

was it traitorous?

maybe

but you actually even help them when they practice

duh the boys are like eyebrow raise emoji

‘wow youre really into volleyball, huh, manager-chan?’

matsukawa commented and you just smiled

‘hmm, my family likes it so ive picked up a thing or two’

LMAO

little do they know your brother is literally the best volleyball player around and is a member of the under 19 team and your father is a volleyball coach in america and would someday be someone iwaizumi hajime (19) would apprentice under

there was a lot of times you thought you would slip up like your home screen was of you and waka but youve been careful to cover it up

BUT

you cant always be sneaky

it was during the first day of the tournament and you were filling up their water bottles I SWEAR WHY IS MANAGER-CHAN ALWAYS FILLING UP WATER BOTTLES when you found a familiar bunch of boys at the end of the hallway just chatting

you havent seen tendou and the boys in so long so you placed the bottles down and rushed over there so quickly

‘TOMUTOMU!’

you shouted and the oddly-haired boy turned and he gasped before grabbing you into a large hug

this grabbed tendou’s attention and he cheered then hugged you too

your giggles and happy cheers were so infectous and they just absolutely missed you so much

these tall boys were at a advantage so someone scooped you up and you were just affectionately being talked to and hugged and LKDSJFSLDFJ SO LUCKY SO LOVED

meanwhile

the plant babies were wondering where the heck you went to

‘y/n-chan?! where is she?!’

oikawa panicked quickly while iwaizumi hit him to shut up

‘be quiet! you won’t find her if you’re too busy freaking out!’

‘ill find her’

matsukawa volunteered and they nodded, feeling at ease of him being capable to find you if you were in trouble

but when he returned empty-handed and with large eyes, they knew something was up

they ran behind mattsun to stop and copy his shocked expression at the sight in front of them

is that

you?

with

shi

oh my god

‘y/n-chan!’

oikawa shouted, being the first to speak

you jumped and your own eyes widened

‘oh. oh no’

you mumbled

the others were so stunned and seijoh itself was so hard to make speechless but they were just shocked

period

‘what is happening’

iwaizumi mumbled

yea the others were just shocked period

‘hey guys’

you waved and you motioned them closer

‘uhh,,, well,,, um they are my friends’

you smiled uneasily and they could see that

‘aaand?’

oikawa signalled you to say everything bc he knew it wasnt the whole story

you sighed

‘ushi,,, jima is my brother’

you mumbled the last part

but they heard you

‘HAH?!’

you cringed and the shira boys were about to move to protect you but they saw you glare at them

‘what? what about it? hes my brother? and?’

you babbled

‘but,, why are you,, in seijoh? dont get me wrong! its just,, youd naturally go to shiratorizawa right?’

mattsun waved his hands around and asked the question thats bugging the team

‘i came to the country late’

‘THE COUNTRY?!’

well,,

turns out you havent exactly told them everything about you yet :/

even when youve cleared the air and introduced waka as your brother, seijoh still didnt say anything

they were stuck in this shocked and surprised moment even at the end of the day and when you went straight to the shiratorizawa team,

they watched with wide eyes as you laughed with goshiki and was jumping around with tendou

‘AH! TOMU! MY HAIR!’

‘TORI-SAN! SATORI-SAN! TAKE THAT!’

wow you were actually really beautiful when youre happy

‘i dont think ive seen her this happy with this much energy’

makki said and they nodded

it was true

you were usually calm and collected and was the perfect balance to this chaotic team

so seeing you so free and loose with them was so refreshing, even if it was with damn ushiwaka

you finally went back to the seijoh boys and they all sent glares to the violet team before sending you a smile

‘you ready to go, manager-chan?’

watari ruffled your hair before handing you your bag to start walking to the bus

‘yea. lets go home’

as you all walked, oikawa was already starting his tantrum

‘y/n-chan~! why aren’t you that happy around us? are we not enough for you?’

oikawa whined and pouted

but you just turned to smiled at him and stopped walking to pat his head

‘im not their manager, therefore im not pressured to act like anyone except as a friend and a spectator. but i try to be as professional as i can with you guys to make sure you dont appear bad to others. and you guys are perfectly chaotic enough, adding me into the mix will just about kill coach’

oikawa didnt seem satisfied though

‘but! thats not fair! they get to see you smile and i dont!’

iwaizumi growled at him to be quiet but you beat him to it

well

you smiled at tooru but your eyes shone maliciously

‘i knew you would act like this, oikawa-san. as punishment, i gave nii-chan your phone number. good luck avoiding him now’

oikawa screamed

a/n: AAWWWWW LETS NOT KILL COACH IRIHATA OKAY? HES LIKE OUR GRANPAPA AND PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE OIKAWA ALONE WAKAWAKA-KUN!

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harryfeatgaga · 2 years

Note

Sunflower and only angel should stay on tour idc what anyone says I love love love sunflower

ME TOOOOO

Anonymous asked: So my brother refused to like Harry all this years and after last night he was all “maybe he’s not that bad 🤔🤔” lmfao

EKDJNFHUJIKNVHJI PLEASE

Anonymous asked: The bunnies & other animals mating in the montage before he went on stage last night makes me feel like I was valid in my initial thought about the love on tour bunnies representing fucking like rabbits 🤪🤪

SO TRUEEEEEE

Anonymous asked: It’s too early to cry

PLEASEEEEE

Anonymous asked: harry's cousin story😔 the little baby watching him play😔😔😔😔 i cryyyyyyyy

I KNOWWWWW

Anonymous asked: NAURRR XANDER WAS THERE!!! HIM LISTENING TO BOYFRIENDS LIKE 🫣well......this is awks🫣

IM CYRUIOFKTGJNBHUVIJKM

Anonymous asked: someone asked who mitch was on twitter and someone said “yassified jesus” 😭😭

KEJHBRGFYUHIVJKOL

Anonymous asked: I literally love Shania. I am obsessed with her

SO ICONIC

Anonymous asked: i’m so proud 😭😭😭😭 he did so good!

SO FUCKING GOOOOD

Anonymous asked: The chemistry between Harry and Shania…why is this performance so hot

NO LITERALLY

Anonymous asked: he is 100% gonna get the best sleep of his life after tonight

SO TRUEERTGRE

Anonymous asked: I’m literally dancing and screaming in my bedroom in the dark at 4am 😂😂😂😂

MEEEEE

Anonymous asked: he’s spoiling us 😩

Anonymous asked: He is feeding us so fucking well

HE FUCKIGN FEDDDD UPPPPPP

Anonymous asked: the strip tease 💔 he’s such a slut i love him

WHOREEEEEE

Anonymous asked: My heart just grew million times bigger I love him soooooooo much MY BABIEEEEEE

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD

Anonymous asked: I can wait for the tour 😭😭😭😭

ME TOORKTFJGNV

Anonymous asked: that was one of THE best carolina performances EVER IM CREAMING

SO GOD DAMN SEYXCHGHFJVK

Anonymous asked: AS IT WAS IS SO GOOD LIVE ARE WE JOKING

SO FUCKIGN GGODOODIKJFN

Anonymous asked: That leaked track list was real…. Okay it’s camp I guess 😵‍💫

Anonymous asked: not that track list being right 😵‍💫

ITS CAMPPOKDJNFBHVJKL

Anonymous asked: wait after Harr y sang wms on SNL how soon did he release it

IT LITERALLY DROPPED AS SNL STARTED HES INSANE

Anonymous asked: already got a “harry styles is gay?” text from my cousin, i know my nanas is coming in the morning 🙏🏽

KOEJNDBFHGHUIJGVOK

Anonymous asked: Forever thankful he stayed headlining Friday. If he was on Sunday night, I’d be getting ready for work now after being awake 24 hours

GOD I KNWEODPF I WAS NEARLY UP FOR 24 HOURS LAST NIGHTGJIVK

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rockyscactus · 4 years

Note

Hey babes! I’m loving your work and honestly it’s fanfriggingtastic!! I was wondering if I could request a Ruel headcannon? Possibly where the reader and Ruel are together on a live just jamming and being goofs? Totally understand if it’s not possible, have a great day 🥰

a/n: first of all, thank you so much! i really appreciate that and aww i was just rewatching some of his lives earlier! im so friggin excited to do this. also im gonna make this a lil blurb instead

"I should probably be a bit quieter", he spoke on the live, "Is Y/N dead? Yes." He'd look back at your sleeping figure with a smile, "Kidding, she's just sleeping. But she's been out for like four hours so I should just double check", he joked.

You rolled over with a slight groan, running your foot into his guitar.

"Hey buddy, we don't give out free foot content here", he'd move your foot out of the frame, waking you up.

"What are you doing", you'd grumble with your face barely above the pillow.

He pointed to his phone, "I'm live. Have any song requests?" He tilted his head, waiting on your response.

"Hmm, Carry Me Home by Jorja Smith please", you'd smile sweetly to ensure that he was suckered into doing it.

He playfully rolled his eyes, "Hear that? That immaculate taste? Guess who designed it", he'd motion to himself.

You slapped his shoulder instantly, "The hell you did! What he means to say is that I redesigned his entire spotify", you credited yourself.

"We can agree to disagree", he refused to admit the truth.

He'd sing the song, making sure to keep eye contact with you because he knew that it drove you wild. You looked at him with nothing but adoration as your chin rested on your hand. Your expression caused him to blush like a madman, chuckling lightly as he tried to get through the song, and the fans were going just as crazy.

"PLS THE WAY HE LOOKS AT HER!!"

"they're def getting lucky tonight"

"oh my gooood he’s so in love with her!! he’s freaking blushing aww"

He looked back at the screen as he finished, “I was not blushing! It’s just hot in here”, he replied to the comments.

"Yeah and he was crying because his eyes were sweaty", your voice dripped with sarcasm, causing him to flick your forehead.

"Fucker", he rolled his eyes.

"Yup", you’d wink at the phone, definitely causing a ruckus in the comments.

He laughed at your comeback, "Baby come here, they can only see like half of your face now."

"That's kinda the point", you'd joke, causing him to pull you closer to him, "Eww I look disgusting."

He'd quickly kiss your forehead, "Hey, watch it! That’s the love of my life you’re talking about.”

“No, I’m not blushing or crying! You really have to get your AC checked out”, you replied to the comments, causing him to immediately make fun of you.

#ruel #ruel van dijk #ruel van dijk fanfic #ruel van dijk imagine #ruel van dijk icons #ruel imagines #ruel one shots #ruel fanfic #ruel fluf #ruel blurb #ruel headcannon #blurbs #fluff #imagines #writing #rockyscactus

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caruliaa · 2 years

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ahhh im so sleeeby ohmg i just want to say before i fall asleep fr howww much i adore you you truly r so meangingful to me in my life you just mean the absolute world… like beyond everythinf you do as a friend and how kind to me you are its just that you yourself are so fun to know and so amazing in my opinion like more than anything that you do you yourself are just so so very lovable … tho ofc everythinf u do is much appreciated and u r so sweet!!! u rlly r! youre an amazinf loveliest ladybird and i hope u get gooood sleep tonight honk shoo and pleasant dreams!! i love u so much!!! (hugs u tight if thats ok!!)

!!! ohh my love ;; !!! i love you so so very much too i hope u knoww im so so so happy tht i mean so much to u my love nd i hope u know u mean so so much to me too u rly rly do my belvoed u make my life smm happier not only by being here for me nd being so supportive nad kind 2 but also j by being urslef nd having u as a friend and knowing u as a person i j love love love you so very much nd everything abt u nd what u have 2 say nd everything u do i j love love love you so os very much my dearest w all of my heart u j mean everything to me and just youre so so very wonderful and amazing and i love you so so much so so very much im so os greatful and lucky 2 know u and have u in my life my dearest so so very lucky !! i hope u got smm good rest and sleep ilusmm babes !! :'> 💞💞💞💞💞 *hugs u back smm so so very much nd gibes u a little kiss on the forhead if u want* /p

#i love you so so much luce so os much :'>#flappy rambles #asks #lucy !#fave

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stonerbughead · 4 years

Text

Maria watches friday night lights (#21)

Things are really heating up!! This is my post for 4x10 + 4x11~

Tami really is the Mother of Dillon; Tim brings Becky to Tami when he doesn’t know what to do about her pregnancy like damn 😭

Ah Big Mary finally came around to the field?! It’s kinda really endearing that a bunch of the old East Dillon alumni are sitting watching the practice now after how this season started

Ugh I recently watched when Karen thought Lucas got Brooke pregnant and slapped him on one tree hill; this Becky scene with her mom has the same energy. The whole teen moms not wanting their kids to make the same mistake trauma ahhh it’s A Lot

Ohhh no did Vince’s mom relapse?!?! Young Michael B. Jordan at his mom’s bedside is so good damn 😭

Fuck Texas law for forcing this doctor to tell Becky the age of the fetus. She wants the abortion! This doctor would be a true hero if he didn’t follow that law. “Supposed to listen to some right wing doctor?!” Same.

God fucking dammit the state facility waiting lists are too long to take Vince’s mom! The system is set up to fail Black and Brown families.

Eric Taylor’s friendship with Big Mary is so funny to me. “You’re telling me I can’t coach the kid because I’m not black.” Eric, that is certainly not what he said I can’t with you

The Riggins brothers are gonna BURY stripped car frames?!

Ew I hate Ryan. And Eric does too.

DEDDDD

Like I truly cackled through this whole scene omfg

Damnnnn Jess having some madddd feels about Big Mary treating Vince like a son 🥺 poor girl

LMAO Tami way to scare the living shit out of Eric waking him up at 3 am with a sentence that includes a hypothetical Julie pregnancy

“This is the stupidest thing we’ve ever done.” Gotta agree with you on that one, Tim. (Also they’re having a real ass talk while burying these car frames!!!!! Lol)

Awww it was Becky’s first time having sex with Luke? That’s so rough.

“Do you think I’m going to hell if I have an abortion?” “No honey I don’t.” Damn these women are so blessed to have Queen Tami Taylor in their Texas small town!!!

I’m glad Becky is getting the abortion and I’m glad she made sure it was her decision after all that pressure from her mom!!! woof

Ah Big Mary finally showed up to his son’s game and is yelling the same things on the sidelines as Jess?! 🥺

Oh I’m so glad Vince found a way to get his mom in rehab, my heart (do we know how he did it tho? Did the gang help him, given the cash?) ....and got it, oh babe are you indebted now 😭 noooo

OMG Buddy on El Fuego is tooo muchhh I’m dying

Uh oh Luke and these painkillers is creeping back in to become a problem...

HOLY SHIT we get to see Saracen in Chicago???? Oh how I’ve missed him! He looks so cute in a scarf! Awww he has a photo of Julie up in his lil apartment?!

Oh we love Eric listening to his interview about the panthers game while sitting in the car staring at the old field! This show is so gooood like damn

Is Luke’s injury finally catching up to him now that he doesn’t have the painkillers to help him work through the pain?! Man this dude is having a rough semester, he was just dealing with a pregnant sexual partner too!

O H N O I had a feeling Luke’s mom coming in to ask Becky about the abortion was not friendly....and yep now she wants to get Tami fired???? Ugh fuck anti choice conservatives

Saracen’s Chicago apartment is so idyllic wow

Omg can you imagine being Julie getting that call all those months later??? I get why she was so upset, he sounded so casual like BOY YOU GHOSTED

Landry’s mom asking what Jess thinks of Obama, so cringe!

Ew Luke Cafferty’s mom at his door like “don’t forget to say your prayers” as if she isn’t trying to ruin Tami’s life with her anti choice nonsense!!!

Yeeeesh Cheryl’s hitting on Tim?? did Cheryl not notice that Becky is clearly super into Tim 😬 this is so much, why is Tim stuck in a love triangle with a mother and her daughter.

W O W Luke doesn’t even know his mom went to talk to Becky, let alone is trying to get Tami fired...fuck, does Becky even realize what is happening??? She’s gonna be so upset when she realizes Tami is being attacked like this!

Yes go off Tami!!! “I gave her her options and I listened to her. That’s my duty as a principal and a human being.”

“Obama, really?” Lol same Jess

Yeah I’m sure this isn’t gonna get out even tho Tami is keeping her job. Im sure the anti choice nuts will take this loss graciously 🙄

Yes Luke, yell at your mom!! I’m so glad he’s defending Becky and Tami! That was not your grandchild, it was a bunch of cells. Relax.

Tami and Eric’s marriage is so pure. Tells her about her victory and he kisses her. “What are you doing tonight?” “Nothing.” “I’ll go get the wine.” “Okay.”

Oh noooo Luke is literally in Carroll Park asking random ppl for Oxys nooo. Damn this season has covered *so* many social issues so seamlessly! The fuckin opioid epidemic, check.

Also guess that whole cleaning up Carroll Park thing didn’t work Eric Taylor!! which duh

Oh Matt babe I’m excited for you but you should’ve maybe not taken off without telling someone you were dating for years?!

Oh the angst!!! “Matt, we were together for almost four years. I know almost everything about you.” DAMN she is really giving it to him!! ugh warranted even tho let’s be real Saracen looks like he’s thriving in Chicago! they’re better off spending this time apart to ~grow~

Aww tinker is really looking out for Luke! this is pretty heartwarming that they’re defying the coach’s plays just to protect Luke bc of his injury.

....Ugh I knew he’d push it too far, babeeee

“I think I’m moving out.” Yeah Tim probably a good life decision.

Oh fuck now Cheryl is making assumptions and going off??? Bitch he did not sleep with your daughter!!

After watching The Wire for four seasons, this operation Vince is indebted to looks so weak sauce. But yikes nooo his friend got shot!

...anddd here comes the press about the abortion controversy. Saw that coming!

Oooof bad timing to want to stay for another drink, Eric.

Omg poor Vince. his best friend died and his mom’s in rehab??? My heart 🥺

#maria watches friday night lights #i watched these and 4x12 the other day and hadnt gotten around to editing/posting #now onto the finale!#mine #friday night lights 4x10 #friday night lights 4x11

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madamsixx · 4 years

Text

Beyond The Leather Chapter: 5 Train Wreck At The End Of The Rainbow

Warnings:

Drug abuse

Sexual situation

For the next couple of days I had agreed to meet Nikki at the Diner by his home. We were actually getting along pretty well. I was also hanging out with his band members. They were really cool. Especially Tommy we really hit it off. But anyways back to Nikki. We told each other about our lives.

I told Nikki about my family, my mom being a respectable doctor and me being close with my sisters. I also told him I was Catholic and believed in God, and that I don't drink, smoke, or do any type of drugs. I let him know that I'm 15. But he wanted us to contiue hanging out. But I let him know as long as we're just friends because he's way to old for me.

He opened up to me about his home life. It was really sad how he grew up. It was dysfunction junction growing up for him. I really felt sorry for him. He has abandonment issues. He told me about his grandparents Tom and Nona raising him. And how he had a half sister named Cecei. I was happy at least he did have two people who loved him.

I finally gave him my number so he could call me. But I told him the hours to call. Yesterday he called and asked if he could take me out tonight because his band members and some friends were going out. I said sure why not. Tamara wasn't going to be home late. She was going to be with one of her guys. But she did leave me with Theresa (her assistant). And Theresa agreed to go out. She's 23 so she liked to have fun of course.

"Ok so Nikki's picking us up and we're going to stop at his place." I hung up the phone after talking to Nikki.

"Oh my God im so excited this is Motley fucking crue were talking about. These guys are bad asses. Ugh and Vince and Nikki I have to have one of them tonight." She smiled and I glared at her.

"Sorry maybe I'll go with Tommy and Vince." She giggled hesitantly and I still glared at her.

"What's the problem you like all of them?" She asked raising her hand.

"No I don't, but these guys are bad news and I don't want you getting hurt. I've heard some of the things that they have done to woman, and it is absolutely disturbing." I stared at her with worry.

I started to worry about going out tonight. I mean I don't party so why am I even going out with them. Plus I'm 15 and these guys are in their 20s.

"Maybe I shouldn't go, I think I'll call Nikki to cancel and just stick with meeting at the diner." I started Making my way back to the phone.

"Iman wait!" Theresa grabbed my hand as I was picking up the phone. "I promise I'll take care of you no matter what. If they try anything with you were outta there ok."

I didn't have time to object because the phone started ringing.

"Hello!"

"Hi miss Darlington there's a Nikki Sixx downstairs here for you."

"Alright thank you we're coming." I put down the phone. "He's here let's go."

I dressed in a tight green dress that really hugged my curves. Theresa curled my hair and I picked gold heels to put on. I grabbed my white small coat and hung it over my shoulders rather than put it on. I wore pink lipstick that really made my lips plump out.

Theresa wore the smallest thing you could ever imagine. She's Latina, she wore a black dress with her boobs popping right out of it. She teased her black hair, and put on black heels. She looked gorgeous.

We got downstairs and I wasn't surprised by Nikki's choice of clothing. He had on a black T-shirt with a big red scarf pulled over it and sunglasses dangling from his shirt with a silver chain. He wore black leather pants with a skulls belt around it and had his tattoos showing. His hair was really teased and he put a band on it to keep his hair up. I can't lie he looked good. But I won't tell him that. I realized he's very cocky and arrogant.

"Wow you look absolutely breathtaking princess." He wrapped his arms around me. He then leaned in and kissed the top of my head, my forehead, and then my cheek.

"U....um Nikki." I cleared my throat nervously. "This is Theresa my friend." I pointed at her.

"Hey nice to meet you." He lifted his hand out to shake hers.

"Like wise she giggled." She says taking his hand. ____

We arrived at Nikki's apartment it turns out he was sharing it with Robbin Crosby. I remembered him from New York. This place was a dump. The carpet was wet because they had a cooler with a hole in it that was filled with ice. There was also only one bed and Robbin was nice enough to let Nikki sleep in it. So where was Robbin sleeping?

"Hey long time no see doll." Robbin pulled me in for a hug.

"Its nice to see you too Robbin." I moved back. "This is Theresa my friend." I pointed at her.

Robbin looked like he was about to just pass out when he saw Theresa. His eyes went wide and he was drooling all over like dog.

"H.....hi wow you're um...you're beautiful." Robbin pulled his hand out to shake hers.

"Thank you hansom." She giggled.

I went into the room Nikki was staying in. He said he just needed to grab a few things from the washroom. When I walked in my eyes went wide. There were posters of me on his wall everywhere. All my magazine shoots were taped up in every angle of the room. He came out of the washroom and looked at me shocked. His face was red with emabrassment.

"If I didn't know any better Nikki I would say you were infatuated with that model on your wall." I crossed my hands and lifted one eye brow smirking at him.

Nikki walked slowly towards me smiling." I'm beyond infatuated with her, I'm obsessed with her. And one day I'm gonna have her." He whispers as he caresses my cheek.

Oh God I need to leave this mans room. But it was cute seeing my pictures everywhere. And as for one day having me, I dont think so.

"Let's go Sixx." I say walking out the door.

"Right behind you princess."

We arrived at a place called The Rainbow. It was really nice. They didn't ID me because I was with Nikki. We saw the rest of his bandmates and some other guys I recognized from New York as well. I have to say I was definitely over dressed. Most of the girls here were wearing little or no cloths at all. And circling around the tables for guys to snatch on to. A lot of them were looking at the Motley boys and the boys that are now known to me as the band called Ratt.

I finally met the 4th member of Motley Crue. His name was Mick Mars, I really liked him. He was sensible but can be crazy when he drinks.

"Cheers fuckers." Tommy says as he holds up a shot glass. And everyone downs there shots.

"Hey beautiful you're not drinking?" Warren asks leaning on to me.

"Oh no I don't drink." I say putting my hand up.

"So you're a model huh, I could tell just by looking at you when I first saw you." He licks his lips and looks me up and down.

"Umhm." I nod. I look over at Nikki who is distracted talking and drinking with the others. I could smell the booze on warrens breath as he starts to inch closer to me.

"Hey Iman right, why don't you and your friend come with me. Us ladies should chat and give the men some room." The woman stuck out her hand for me to take. She had big brown teased hair, she was tall and absolutely gorgeous.

"Um I think I'll stay here and do shots with the guys." Theresa states.

"Good, girl you'll have more fun with us than chatting with Tommy's wife." Vince says while putting an arm around her neck.

Tommy's married wow that's interesting. I took her hand and got up to go with her. Warren frowned and side eyed Tommy's wife.

"Hey babe don't go to far." Nikki spoke up as he grabbed my arm. He pulled my arm down and kissed my cheek. He to was drinking alot.

But wait he called me "babe".

Me and Tommy's wife went into another booth. It was definitely better then being with all those guys.

"I'm Candice Starrek Lee, Tommy's wife." She holds her hand out to shake mine.

"Iman Darlington, nice to meet you." I greeted her.

"So you're a model as well, I've seen some of your pictures. You're absolutely gorgeous." She smiles.

"Thank you, you are too."

We talked a lot. Candice was a model herself and told me about the do's and dont's of modeling. She also gave me a warning one that I will never forgot.

"So you and Nikki Sixx are together?" She asked.

"Oh uh no." I waved my hands up. "We're just friends that's all."

"Listen, Nikki is a good guy and all, but you should keep your distance from him. He has two sides to him. And he is very destructive. If you care about yourself and your career. You'll stay as far away from him as possible." She warned.

She had a stern look on her face and I knew she wasn't kidding. Nikki is the guy that your parents warned you to stay away from. And I'm sure she has kown Nikki for while do to marrying Tommy. So chances are she knows what she's talking about.

"So what are the two sides?" I asked in a worried voice.

"He does hero......

"Hey babe." Tommy slurred interrupting our conversation. "We're gonna go now I'd like you all to my self. Sorry Mani I'm fucking horney." He said falling into the booth.

"I've got to get him home, it was nice meeting you." She lifted Tommy up.

"Yeah same here."

I wish she could have finished what she was going to say. I got up and headed back to the table were everyone was at. But I realized half of them were gone.

"Warren where's Theresa and Nikki?"

"Theresa's in the bathroom getting fucked by....by....Robbin I think...I don't fucking know." He slurred.

I ran to the washroom and burst open the door. "What the hell get off of her you pigs!" I ran pushing and shoving the guys away from her.

Stephen, Robbin , and Vince were running a train on her. These guys are pigs. I couldn't believe them.

"Theresa were going." I demanded grabbing her and pulling down her dress and fixing her bra.

"Oooooook, I had fun though. My pussy feels sooooo gooood. Thanks for bringing me." She slurred while hugging me.

She was completely drunk and had some white stuff on her nose. What the hell!

"Look she wanted it from all of us." Vince chuckled while zipping his pants up.

"That doesn't mean you have to do it. Shes drunk she doesn't know what she wants!" I stated holding her up.

"Hey stop being so stiff and loosen your pussy up. My dick would fit better in there if you did." Stephen laughed.

"Hey guys stop, do you want help with with her?" Robbin moved close to us.

"You guys are disgusting. And I wouldn't be caught dead sleeping with any one of you." I glared at all of them with the most disscusted look I could have on my face.

"News flash sweety, You're about to get involved with one of us disgusting guys." Stephen smirked and lifted an eye brow.

I walked out of the washroom carrying Theresa on my arm and saw Nikki at the table with some groupie on his lap.

"Nikki we need to leave, I need to get her home now please." I demanded.

"I'm not ready to fucking go." He slurred.

This is just great Nikki is wasted to. I could care less about the groupie. I moved towards the back where the guys were laughing. I hated all of them.

"Hey I'll call you girls a car home."

I turned to see Mick walking towards the phone.

"Thank you so much Mick."

15 min later....

He helped me carry Theresa outside to where the car was waiting for us.

"Thank you so much Mick I appreciate it. I really do." I hugged him them got into the car.

"No sweat kid." He smiled closing the door.

We arrived back at the condo I was praying that Tamara wasn't home yet. She would crucify me if she caught us and the state of Theresa. I opened the door and......

"You are in big big big trouble." Tamara stood in front crossing her arms over her chest.

#vince neil #nikki sixx #tommy lee #mick mars #motley crue #motley #crue #hair metal #glam metal #80s

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r3b3lgrrrrrrrl · 5 years

Text

A LunaTic and her Gunn (Part 13)

"Fucking Mr. Baker"

In the bedroom, Luna's head is still buzzing. She pops a Xanax and downs a whole bottle of water. She hands both to Colson, he does the same. "What time's your flight?" She asks. Peeling off her suit.

"8A" He replies, shorts dropping.

She eyeballs his dick. He's hard and its huge. Making Luna salivate. "Fuck. So you'll get there, what 1p? I thought you were getting her in the morning."

"That is my morning, Kitten." He sees her staring at him intently.

"True." She says rubbing her eyes. His dick is still there when she opens them. Trails are still coming hard in random spurts and she can't tell if his dick is growing bigger or if it's just her mind. She doesn't realize how hard she's staring at it until he speaks.

"You wanna do something about it?" He asks.

"What?"

"You're staring at my dick like you have a test on it." He says laughing.

Sitting down on the edge of the bed, she looks up at him, asking "Wanna see if I can pass, Mr. Baker? While grabbing his thigh and pulling him close to her. With his dick dangling in her face, she puts both hands on his ass cheeks while she soaks his balls and base of his cock.

Colson leans his head back groaning as her mouth glides up his cock to the tip. "You're a bad girl, Luna Smith."

"Mmmmhhmm" she hums as she puts as much of him as she can fit into her mouth. Using one hand to move and twist the parts she can't reach. Her other hand squeezes, digging her nails into his bare ass cheeks as she sucks his dick hard and long.

"Let me fuck you." He requests, breathing heavily.

Releasing him from her mouth. She looks up "Do whatever you want, Bunny."

With that he pushes her back and flips her over, onto the bed. She moans, propping herself up on her elbows while dropping her lower back, wiggling her ass up high for him. She yelps as he slaps it hard. Before entering her, he grabs her by both bare hips and licks her pussy from front to back. Pulling her close and sucking hard.

"MMMMMM... Fucking Peaches." He thinks slurping up her juices."

He feels her body twitching against his face. Letting go off her pussy. He bites the tattoo on her right ass cheek. She giggles and tries to climb away but he pulls her back. "Where do you think you're going?" He taunts her as he slides his dick slowly inside of her. She moans as she shifts, rocking her hips, helping him adjust his girth. Once he's fully in he takes long, deep stokes into her tight pussy. She starts pushing harder into his strokes, breath flittering, as she begins to ride his cock from behind.

"God Damn, there she goes again!" He thinks fully enjoying her enthusiasm.

With that slides his hand around her throat, pulling her ear to his mouth. "You like taking this dick don't you, you little whore." He huskily breathes into her.

"Holy fucking shit balls of hell!!!" Her mind throwing out the most random things whenever he talks her this way.

"OH YES, Mr. Baker!" She exclaims slamming her ass hard against his hips, shoving him deeper inside of her. "Who's whore am I?" She begs.

"Mine. You're fucking MINE. And I'm cuming ALL inside of you!!" He groans as she bucks against him, making him explode inside of her. As his dick throbs, her pussy walls tighten. Riding his dick, she comes hard with his words. Luna opens her thighs wide, slowly using her elbows to slide she body down on to the bed. Colson lays against her naked back. Still inside of her. Both are silent with pleasure.

"I love how she lets me lay inside of her." He thinks contently. She smells like summer he notices as he breathes her in.

After a few moments he kisses the middle of her back before he slides out of her, making her whine. She rolls over on her back and looks up at him. "I fucking love you." She says tiredly.

"I fucking love you." He replies. Offering his hand and a towel. She stands up, pulling his face down towards hers for a sensual kiss before they clean themselves off and climb into bed.

As she lays her head on his chest, she asks if he has an alarm set. He does, he tells her wrappping his arm around her. Their legs tangle together. The Xanax has kicked in. Both being tired and satisfied they easily drift off to sleep.

Luna's worry still lives, whispering to her in the back of her tired mind. "Fuck. I hope she likes me...."

--------------------------------------------------

"FUCK, I hate mornings." Colson thinks shutting his alarm off. "Damn, she's knocked." Looking at Luna, he notices the alarm hadn't bothered her at all. "Let's keep it that way." He kisses her forehead before wiggling out of bed trying not to wake her. It doesn't work.

"Mmmm..." She moans once she feels him moving "Where are you going?" She asks without opening her eyes.

"Gotta get Cas, remember?"

"Mhm. Do you want me to get up with you?" She asks, eyes still closed.

He kisses her head. "No Bunny, sleep. Call me when you wake up." He kisses her again "I love you."

"Mmm. Love you too. Text me when you land, please."

"Of course." He kisses her head again. She burrows into the bed as Colson heads to the bathroom to shower.

In the shower Colson jerks off, recalling all the different ways he's fucked Luna in the last 3 days. He cums quickly and finishes up in the shower. Once out he can feel his hangover lifting.

"Such a good remedy" He laughs to himself.

He makes his way quietly out of the bathroom and gets dressed. He already has a bag packed but is throwing in a couple loose ends when he sees Luna's barely covered naked body out of the corner of his eye. She's peacefully sleeping.

"FUCK, she's gorgeous." He thinks, refraining from kissing her before he walks out of the room, not wanting to disturb her. He makes sure the door is tightly closed behind him.

--------------------------------------------------

In the uber to the hanger, Colson can't stop thinking about Luna. He pulls his phone out while walking to the plane, wanting to Snap her when he realizes they're not friends.

"We'll be fixing THAT." He flips through his gallery before choosing a pic and texting it to her saying 'Miss u. ❤ u 😽.'

--------------------------------------------------

Luna wakes up to an empty bed. Touching where Colson should be, she vaguely remembers a conversation with him this morning. She grabs her phone to check the time and sees she has a text from Colson.

"It's not even noon yet, there's no way he's landed already. She thinks opening his text. It's the first selfie they ever took together, telling her, he misses and loves her. "He's so sweet" she thinks before looking closely at the picture "We look so FUCKED up and serious. Why??? " She asks herself, laughing out loud before calling Colson.

It rings but he doesn't answer. She lays there for a second before getting up and throwing on a pair of black boy shorts and a black tank top. She makes her way downstairs. Only Pete is in the kitchen, at the table. She grabs a cup of coffee before joining him. "Morning" she greets him sitting down.

"Morning." He says, looking worse for wear. Luna begins to roll a joint hoping it will subside her own ailments.

She sparks it, taking in a long smooth drag. It makes her heady. After hitting it a few more times, she passes it to Pete.

"What are you doing today, Loons?" He asks, exhaling.

"Besides a shower, I'm not sure. I may hit HFC, pay some respects. Tool around downtown with my camera." She shrugs. "What about you?" She asks. Taking the joint and hitting it.

"Headed home. Gotta start preparing for next week's show."

"Hm. That sucks. It was nice hanging with you these last couple days tho." She says leaning her head against his shoulder. He leans the side of his face on top of her head. "Be safe."

He lifts it back up. "Yeeeahh....And it was." He says. "When you headed home?"

"I don't know." She says lifting her head too. "I sold the apartment." Hitting the joint again before passing it.

"REALLY?" He turns, looking at her, a little shocked as he takes it.

"Yeah." She sighs, shrugging.

They don't say much more. They've been friends long enough that they don't need to. They pass the joint back and forth, both of their minds drifting to Justin.

As she takes a last hit, she tries not to cough. "When you leaving?"

"My uber should be here in like 20 mins."

"Shit, well gimme a hug because I'm gonna boogie too." She says standing up.

They embrace. A nice, solid, comforting friend hug. She squeezes him. "Love ya, Petey."

He squeezes her back and pecks her on top of the head. "Love ya too, Loons." They let go of each other. As she begins to walk away, he grabs her hand. "Im really happy for you and Kells."

They smile at each other. "Thank you. You know what that means to me." She smiles at her friend "See you soon." She squeezes his hand and he nods. She turns and heads upstairs, ordering her own uber on the way up.

--------------------------------------------------

Once landing in Cleveland, Colson heads directly to Emma and Casie's house.

"DADDY!!!" She exclaims, jumping on him and greeting him with a huge hug. She kisses him right on the cheek.

"How are you, Pumpkin?" He asks her, laughing.

"I'm gooood. What are we gonna do?" She asks excitedly.

Laughing again, he sets her down "I don't know yet, I wanna talk to Mommy real quick. Where is she?"

"In the kitchen."

"Cool, go grab your bag." He tickles her as she runs off giggling.

--------------------------------------------------

Colson walks into the kitchen, finding Emma by the stove. She looks up. "Hey Em." He says pecking her on the cheek before sitting down at the island. "Gotta sec?"

"Sure."

"I met someone."

"I'm glad we've never been the bullshitting type." He thinks cutting right into it.

"Reeeeally?" She looks up from the vegetables she's sauteeing, intrigued. They haven't had this conversation on his behalf before. "Good for you." She smiles at him. "What's she like?"

His face lights up "She's really great. She's a photographer and an artist too. She's really smart, down to earth and sweet. I'm in love with her Em, and I want Cas to meet her."

"Ok." Emma nods in agreeance. "I'd like to meet her first, if you don't mind." Protective over her daughter and aware of Colson's lifestyle.

"Yeah, I'm cool with that. I was gonna stay at my house tonight. If I can get her out here tomorrow, you think your mom'll watch Cas so we can all go to lunch?"

"I don't see why not" She shrugs. "So, around this time? She asks looking at the clock.

"Let me hit her up." He says standing up. Pulling his phone out of his pocket, he notices he has a missed call from Luna. He hits call back while walking out of the room.

--------------------------------------------------

Emma goes back to her vegetables, Colson has never brought a girl home before. It has her wondering about this her.

"Crap, I meant to ask him her name." She thinks to herself.

--------------------------------------------------

Luna had gone back to Ashley's, no one was there so she showered quickly and hopped another uber. She's now roaming around the Hollywood Forever Cemetery with her camera in a flowing floral dress, flannel, chunky jewelry and basic docs.

"I love how beautiful it is here." She thinks while taking a few shots as she wanders.

There's a few personal graves she lingers by, having a private chat. Then placing a flower at each one. A singular flower for a handful of hearts. Trading one for the other she has brought with her.

Strolling through, letting her hands graze headstones, her ringing phone breaks her random thoughts.

"Hello."

"Hey, Kitten."

"Hi Bunny, how was your flight?"

"Not bad, sorry I missed your call."

"No worries, what's up? Everything alright?"

"Yeah, everything's great.

"But.....?" She asks.

He chuckles appreciating her bluntness. "How do you feel about flying out here to have lunch with Casi's mom, Emma tomorrow. She wants to meet you before Cas does." Luna's silent. "If it's too much..." Colson starts.

"No, no, no..." She interrupts. "I was just thinking I'd rather fly this evening, then try to pull some crazy early shit like you did this morning. I can just stay in a hotel and be fresh instead of airplane jumbled. You know what I mean."

"You don't have to stay in a hotel, you can stay with me."

"Isn't Cas coming home with you?"

"Oh, yeah."

"I love you, but you're an idiot." She laughs.

"So, you'll really come? He asks excitedly.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I? It's important."

"I love you, Luna."

I love you too, you fucking nut ball." She laughs shaking her head. They agree that she'll book her flight but that he can book her room, since he knows Cleveland better than she does. They talk a bit longer.

"Alright." She finishes "I'll hit you up later. Love you too." She says hanging up. She had really went rogue while on the phone, wandering far into the cemetery. She finds a mausoleum and plunks down in its shade to book her flight.

As it hits her, she sighs deeply, trying not to be intimated by the scenario. She's only dated Justin seriously and they had been together since they were kids. "All in, Loons. Either way, he's fucking worth it." She thinks to herself. Knowing so as she smiles, from her racing heart and skin tingling at the simple thought of Colson.

--------------------------------------------------

To be continued.....

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thetowerupright · 4 years

Text

this is absolute word vomit. sorry in advance.

i started a new med and my psychiatrist said to take it in the morning bc it wont make me as drowsy as the last anxiety med, but when picking up my med the pharmacist said I absolutely need to take it at night bc i’ll get extremely drowsy. i decided to take it bc i had a horrible panic attack at walgreens so it would help me sleep. so i took it at midnight and laid in bed until 2:45 just not being able to sleep :) sooo i guess the med fought against my actual sleep med and now im wide awake :)) ANYWAYS these are all of my thoughts since midnight

1. i had to delete my twitter app bc i like going on there at night and signing petitions bc there’s so many resources for them on twitter. however so many people are coming out about being raped or molested which is good bc i want people to tell their stories but holy shit it is so triggering. just seeing stories and details like i go on and i have to log off a short time later bc im so triggered. it sucks because i want to be there for people but i cant do that if im triggered ya kno?

2. i have always loved amy winehouse for so many reasons but when i sing one of her songs it’s the only time i feel confident in my singing. she was just such a gem and it makes me so sad to know i’ll never be able to see her live. i’ll go a couple months without listening to her and then a song will come on shuffle and she’s all i listen to for the next 24 hours i love her so much

3. going back to singing, god damn. i miss that shit. i miss performing and being on stage and singing and dancing and acting. i posted a video of me singing on tik tok and i keep almost deleting it because i sound so terrible. i am so terribly out of practice. the other day i found like the tap dance side of tik tok and i almost bought myself some tap shoes and a floor set so i could start tap again. i still remember so much lol but like my singing im so out of practice. bc of my rapist and shitty people in high school i feel like i sound so fucking terrible and have so much anxiety singing infront of people. it sucks i just wanna work on the fear

4. i heard recently that people with anxiety will tend to watch the same tv and movies over and over and over again bc their brain already knows how it ends, and i felt so snatched!!! i restarted the office last week, soooo this is my 13th time watching it. ive watched 5 seasons in like 9 days. and when i finish it (which will probably be in the next couple days) ya kno what im gonna do? PLAY SEASON ONE EPISODE ONE lmfao the office is my tv show weighted blanket

5. i realized that since deleting my instagram soooo much tension has left me. like not just in my body but my soul as well. that shit is just so extremely toxic. im glad i deleted my account and dont have the pressures in my life to please people on social media. i did get a little annoyed tho bc people kept messaging me wanting an explanation and i dont owe anyone shit! however it was fucking hysterical when i put out 24 hours before deleting it that i was leaving and all the men actively in my dms were messaging me all upset like HONEY you’ll be FINE go masturbate to someone else GOOD BYE

6. my savage x fenty package was suppose to be here monday and still isnt here :) so im in nashville and it went from indianapolis, to memphis, to louisville, and is supposedly in nashville as of tonight. like they went south and passed me, then was in the SAME STATE, went NORTH OF ME, and now it’s here. it was also shipped by fedex and i haaate fedex because similar shit like this ALLLLLWAYS happens!! honestly im only frustrated bc im so use to my amazon packages being at my house 4-48 hours later. i say 4 hours bc last month i order something at 4am and it was delivered to my house at 8am that day lol

7. i saw a tik tok about rape that said hey guess what every 7 years you have new cells so in 7 years you’ll have a body that was never touched by your rapist. im happy bc nov 11 will be 7 years since the start of everything so those cells will be gone. but he raped me in february so that’ll be another 7 years for new cells. it’s nice to know i’ll have new cells one day that arent touched by him, but as i sit here typing this i can still feel where he first touched me in nov 2013 and i wish i could burn all my skin off

8. in the last 2 days i have eaten....3 bites of a grilled cheese. :)) like ive gone to eat and just the smell of food makes me so sick. i wish i could go back to my attempt in april and be like “hey frankie yeah uhhhhh dont do this...for obvious reasons ofc but also bc you literally will not eat food for months!!!” i cant tell you how many times ive gotten food i love and taken a bite and it’s soooo gooood and then after two or three more bites my body is like “NOOOOOPE ABORT MISSION”

9. it’s almost a year since rileys death. i’m trying to keep myself distracted as best i can. it’s hard though. i miss them so much. i feel so empty sometimes without them physically being in my life anymore. a year has passed and i still find myself picking up my phone to talk to them. ive gone through this pain before and i know it gets better it truly does. but right now it’s hard and painful and absolutely heartbreaking and soul shattering. i hope whatever happens after death, riley is okay. theyre happy and free and their soul is more alive than it was on earth.

10. i felt suicidal today and for a moment yesterday for the first time in awhiiiile. not actively or wanting to do harm to myself, but just not wanting to live anymore. when i talked to my resident about it today and how i was dealing with it, he said i was doing a really really good job. and that he was proud of me. i didnt cry then but when he went to get the psychiatrist that was subbing in for mine, i did cry a little. i wish i heard more that people were proud of me. i’ll appreciate that from anyone, but i fucking wish my family would tell me that. they never really have, going all the way into childhood to now. idk i just feel like nobody is proud but im trying so fucking hard.

11. the sun is rising and it’s so pretty outside. despite everything, this week is going well. it’s not like fantastic or anything, but i feel a little more lively this week than the past several weeks. a few weeks ago i looked at myself in the mirror and started sobbing. not just because i hate how i look and my body. but because i saw no light or life in my eyes. i took a selfie a couple days ago, and i saw a little light and life again. im not gonna say things are better, but things are very very slowly improving. just gotta do the next right thing. ttyl :)

#word vomit

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