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#but i've decided other posts can always be made
avatar-anna · 2 days
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i saw this post on and got inspired. enjoy!
"It was nice running into you."
"Yeah, yeah, you too. It was—I'm glad we could catch up."
You held your bag in both of your hands and leaned back on your heels, waiting for the sudden tension to cease. Harry scratched his neck awkwardly while you looked down at the cobbled streets beneath your shoes. When a minute passed and neither of you said anything, when two couples excised themselves to walk past you, you finally decided to break the silence.
"I'm headed this way."
"Me too. We can walk together?"
"O—Okay."
Harry extended his arm out, a clear message for you to go first, so you did. For a split second, his hand grazed your lower back in that protective gesture he always used to use when you walked anywhere. But that had been when you were together, and now you weren't, and even though his hand merely hovered awkwardly behind you, you swore you could still feel it.
"Your hair looks nice. I don't think I've ever seen it so short before," you said, needing to break the silence all over again before it consumed you.
"Thanks, I, uh, I shaved it a few months back. It's finally starting to grow in."
It must've been soon after your break up, you realized, quickly doing the math in your head. A change, a fresh start after the end of a long relationship. You understood that, knew neither of you needed to comment on it, or the fact that you no longer wore the necklace Harry bought you for your first anniversary, though you'd seen him glance down at the missing piece of jewelry multiple times since you ran into each other.
"It's cute," you said, resisting the intrusive urge to reach up and touch his hair, instead clasping your hands behind your back.
"Are you across the bridge?" Harry asked, gesturing to one of the many bridges that stretched across the Tiber.
"Yeah. How'd you know?"
Harry shrugged, the canvas bag on his shoulder slipping a fraction. "You always liked Trastevere."
You smiled, charmed by how Harry still seemed to know you so intrinsically. "And you? Are you staying in Prati?"
Harry shook his head before waving to a fan who had spotted him. He didn't stop, though, and kept walking beside you, asking about your family, specifically your grandmother, who was his Scrabble partner nearly the entirety of your relationship.
"Good. I play Scrabble with her on the weekends now. I'm pretty sure she thinks I'm not a good enough opponent, but she'll never say it to my face."
"Graceful as always, your nan," Harry nodded in agreement. "Probably wouldn't say the same thing about chess, though."
"No, probably not. Do you still play?" you asked, tilting your head up to look at him.
He was so close, close enough that the sleeve of his green shirt grazed your bare arm. Close enough that if you really wanted it to the back of your hand could graze his. Instead you shifted your hand away.
"When I can," Harry said, his mouth twitching as if recalling a memory. "I've been focusing on writing most days, but I play whenever I'm stuck."
"How's that going?"
"How's work?"
"Sorry, go ahead," you said, blushing a little. Would it always be this awkward around him? You hoped not. Harry had been a friend first, and even though you knew you shouldn't,y you missed his companionship some nights. Lots of nights. Most nights.
"No, you go. Catch me up on all the latest drama at work."
So you did, falling back into familiar, neutral territory as you brought Harry up to speed on your co-workers.
Before long, you'd made it to the apartment you were renting, your palms suddenly warm as you searched your purse for your keys. You were stalling, you both knew it, but Harry didn't comment, nor did he leave, didn't offer any reason to finally say goodbye.
You knew this was where it was supposed to end. That a chance encounter with your ex in a foreign country really shouldn't have gone on this long. You knew that, and yet...
"Do you want to come in?" you asked, scrambling for any logical reason as to why Harry should follow you into your apartment. "I—I, uh, I could make us coffee and—"
"Please. I mean—Sure. That would be...that would be fine."
Relief flooded through you, though that was quickly replaced by a guilty sort of anticipation as you unlocked the door to the main building of the apartment, as Harry followed you up a couple flights of stairs, as he waited once again for you to unlock a door. When you were inside, when you set your things down on the small dining table, you turned to face your ex.
Harry's gaze was once again lowered to your collarbones, to the place where the necklace he gave you used to sit. Then he met your eyes, the expression in them clear. It was the first time you'd seen them since running into him today. He'd kept his sunglasses on the whole time, perhaps to hide his expressions more, because now that you properly met his gaze, you saw it all. Those green eyes you still loved so much betrayed his every thought, and you knew yours probably did as well.
It was hard to say who moved first. If you grabbed the front of Harry's shirt before he wrapped an arm around your waist and fisted your hair in his other hand. But none of it mattered when your mouth met his, when your hands traveled up to cup the sides of his face, your thumbs tracing the familiar planes of his face.
A graze of his teeth against your bottom lip had you gasping, had him smiling as if that was the exact reaction he'd been hoping for. You responded in kind by dragging your nails down his scalp, satisfied by the groan that vibrated against your mouth as his tongue caressed yours.
"This isn't—It's not—" you tried to say, losing focus as Harry left a trail of kisses from your jaw to the base of your neck and back up again. "This doesn't mean—"
"I know," Harry breathed, his forehead pressed against yours as he toyed with the bow that held the front of your blouse together. Your breath hitched as his knuckle grazed your exposed stomach. "This doesn't change anything. Now take this off."
You almost made him do it just because he ordered you to, but you knew why he wanted you to be the one to untie the knot of your blouse. It meant you were saying yes to this moment, it meant you were saying yes to doing whatever it was you were about to do.
So you pulled at the blouse until it came undone, leaving it open so it revealed a strip of bare skin going right up the middle of your body. The rest you would leave up to him.
Harry shrugged out of his own sweater and t-shirt before reaching out to push back the shoulders of your shirt until it was off completely, falling into a puddle of fabric at your feet beside his. His gaze alone was too much and not enough, more explicit than it had any right to be. He stood there and drank you in for a full minute as if in a daze, taking in every mark and imperfect like he was reacquainting himself.
It was hard to get the words out, but you managed. "Still broken up?"
"Yeah," Harry said, his eyes still roving over every inch of your body that he could see. Then he blinked as if remembering the situation for what it was. "Yeah, still broken up."
There wasn't much left to say after that, really.
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annwrites · 2 days
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you're my girl and i'm your man
— pairing: billy hargrove x fem!reader
— type: ficlet
— summary: you & billy go sight-seeing after you make up. he then teaches you how to drive his car a bit. afterward, you go back to the motel & have your first time (which doesn't go exactly as planned initially).
— tags: billy groveling a bit. billy being sweet on you again. billy letting someone else touch his car. billy being the first one to touch you.
— tw: eating, drinking, sex
— word count: 5,586
— a/n: ok, so, i know i put in the tire blowout post that they were right near the tx border & after '10 hrs of driving' they'd gotten into tx, which is like...did the boy get lost or what lol. but, we're going to ignore that (even if they'd eventually jumped on route 66, it still wouldn't have taken them that long) so they can have a lil daytrip in amarillo.
the 'first time' scene didn't have some big *mutual orgasm* moment bc i've had it planned longer than i did the rest of this chapter even. i wasn't abandoning the oral sex scene idea just to make things ~perfect~ like any other fic would've prob done. sex isn't always like that. it's messy, it's funny, it can be embarrassing. it's rarely like a movie. and that's ok, so long as it's with the person you love.
big texan | cadillac ranch
find my other posts concerning billy here
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It'd not taken long, but you'd eventually cried yourself to sleep against Billy's chest. He'd held you all the while, whispering sweet nothings to you, rocking you, giving you soft kisses, promising over and over: never again.
He'd carried you to bed, pulling your body against his, and he'd closed his eyes, swallowing the lump in his throat, trying to focus on anything but all the shit he'd forced you to put up with today. He'd nearly lost you.
He had nearly lost you.
You'd been so close to walking out that door. Had made a plan of escape. He'd forced your hand.
He feels exhausted himself, but is now afraid to close his eyes. What if you did it? What you said you'd intended to: leave once he's fallen asleep.
He decides that there's nothing more he can do to stop you if that's what you choose. If you want to leave, he'll let you go. He can't keep you prisoner. All he wants is what's best for you. Whatever will bring you happiness and peace. That's what love is. Putting someone else's wants—needs—before your own.
Finally, he drifts off to sleep, hoping to return to his dream that'd been cut painfully short that morning. When everything was still perfect, just as it should've been.
Should've remained.
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When you wake, it's nearly noon and you're in bed alone.
You sit up slowly, still somehow a bit tired, despite having slept so long and you rub your eyes, yawning.
"Morning, baby." You hear a deep familiar voice call a few feet away.
You turn and see Billy emerging from the bathroom, a gentle smile on his face. He comes over, sitting beside you on the bed. "You sleep okay?"
You nod lightly, yawning yet again. Crying usually did take it out of you.
You go to get up to begin getting your things together, until he takes your hand in his.
"You can go back to sleep if you want. I went ahead and paid up for another day."
"You did?"
He nods.
You look down to his large hand which rests overtop of yours. Your brows furrow. "What...what did you mean by it?" You can't just let it sit. You can't sit in unsurety.
He reaches up, tucking some hair behind your left ear. "What, baby?"
"'You're mine'."
"What do you think I meant?"
You shrug, not looking up.
He sighs. "That you're my girl and I'm your man. We're going together, going steady, dating, whatever the fuck you want to call it."
He says it quietly, no aggression, no irritation, just...calling it what it is.
Your eyes finally meet his then. "I assume you expect me to be faithful. Will you give me the same respect?"
He leans down, gently pressing his lips to yours. "Honey, I don't want anybody else."
You sigh. "You've been with more girls than I probably want to know about. And looked at—flirted with—numerous since we've been on the road-"
He chuckles. "I told you before, sweetheart, I did it to get under your skin. To be a dick." He smirks. "It's one of my specialties, I'd say."
You don't laugh or smile at the joke.
He understands. He knows it's going to take a lot of work and groveling and sucking up to get back to where you'd been the night before last.
"Do you want to lie back down, get some more rest?"
You glance up to him. "Will you lie down with me?"
"Of course."
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Billy leaves his briefs on as he pulls you to his chest, your head resting atop it, your hand over one of his pectorals. He tangles the fingers of his right hand in your hair, gently rubbing your head, while the other rests overtop of your hand on his chest.
You lie there for a moment, listening to the steady strong beat of his heart. "What time is it?"
"Time for you to get a watch," he replies immediately, his lip twitching. Maybe now wasn't the time for sarcasm, but he wanted to lighten the mood even a little.
You roll your eyes, even if it makes you feel the least bit better to be back to bantering.
"I have one, remember?"
"Mm," he hums his reply.
"Did...did it mean something to you? What we did the night before last?"
He presses a kiss to the top of your head. How the hell could he have let you go a whole day thinking otherwise? He had known when you came back out of that gas station that you'd been crying. Had wanted to wrap his car around a tree the worse his treatment toward you became. It killed him to do it, but he'd expected you to fight back like you always had. Instead, you'd just...given up.
"You have no idea what it meant to me, sweetheart. A lot. Before...whatever shit I did with a girl was just sex. Not intimacy. Things are different with you."
He turns on his side then and you do as well, looking at each other.
You reach forward, taking his left hand in yours. "When did you realize how you felt?"
You look up to him with innocent eyes.
He looks down to your small hand in his and he brushes his thumb along your knuckles. "I'm not really sure. I mean, I've felt something for awhile. But I told myself it was just an attraction. A crush. Nothing more. And then yesterday morning, I had this dream..." He trails off for a moment and you scoot a bit closer to him.
"What was the dream about?"
His eyes meet yours again. "We'd finally reached Cali and...we were making love in my car. You kept saying my name. I think I just heard you trying to wake me up. But I thought you were about to say it—those three words. I was practically begging you to. And then I woke up and I knew I was down bad. I didn't know what the fuck to do with that: being in love. So I did the only thing I knew how to and punished you for it. For making me fall for you. Even if that had never been your intention, it happened anyway. It was always going to, I think."
You gently press your palm against his chest, curling your fingers against the warm, tanned skin.
He continues. "Maybe I just woke up pissed off from it because I also thought that would be the only way for me to hear it: in my dreams. That you could never feel that way for me. That no one could."
You look up at him to find that he's already looking at you.
Your heart begins to beat just slightly faster. Then, "I love you, too."
His brows furrow and his eyes begin to grow a bit red.
He wraps his arms around you, pulling you into a firm embrace. He presses his lips to your hair. "Thank you," he mutters.
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The two of you fall asleep for a couple more hours and when he wakes, you're sitting up, back against the headboard as you flip idly through the TV channels.
He slides his hand up your leg, between your legs and you look down at him.
"You hungry?" He asks, lying his head on your thigh. "I know I made keeping food down a bit...difficult yesterday." He thinks of you retching on the side of the interstate. How he'd nearly done the right thing by reaching out to you, but had refrained. Stupid.
He sits up then and you watch him.
You mute the TV, growing serious. "If you ever treat me like that again-"
"I won't-"
"Let me finish."
He stays quiet.
"If you ever treat me like again, it will be the last. I mean it this time. There will be no more forgiveness. No more second, third, and fourth chances. I will walk away. For good. I've probably already given you more chances than I should've."
He nods, knowing you indeed have. "I know." His eyes look into your own, hopeful. "So does that mean you do: forgive me?"
You unmute the TV. "I think it's going to take time."
He nods. "I understand." Then after a beat of silence, "Is there anything I can do?"
You toy with the remote in your hands. "I don't mind the sarcasm and joking around. But I need this, too."
He rests his head on your breasts, wrapping an arm around your waist. "I know. I just need you to be patient with me."
You roll your eyes toward the ceiling. "I've been nothing but, Billy."
He smirks. "I never promised that I'd make it easy on you."
Your stomach growls then and he chuckles, standing. He extends a hand toward you. "C'mon, I'll buy you lunch."
You have half-a-mind to be petty and ask about his comment of him 'no longer being your meal-ticket', but are so sick of fighting that you just slide your hand into his.
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Billy had stopped at an interesting restaurant along Route 66, called 'The Big Texan', which was quite the attraction. The place was packed, with taxidermy lining the walls, and the interior was modeled after an old western saloon. You'd held tightly to his hand as the hostess led you to your table.
Billy had ordered himself a lager that they kept on-tap, while you'd ordered a glass of ice water, downing the thing almost instantly. The waitress had returned soon after to give you a refill and to take your orders. He'd ordered a ribeye while you'd gone with a fried sandwich. You'd considered a quesadilla, but didn't want anymore Mexican-style food. Not after yesterday.
You glance up to him once you're halfway through your sandwich. "Do...should I pay for this?" You ask, gesturing to your lunch.
He should've never said that to you. Honestly, after he had, he'd sat in the car pissed at himself for doing so. He liked taking care of you— knowing he was the first man to really do so. If he'd let you get yourself your own motel room... He doesn't want to think of everything he'd nearly lost, all due to his own selfishness...cowardice.
He brushes his leg against yours under the table. "No, baby, let me get the check. Let's just...go back to the way things were before yesterday. I know we can't just forget about it, but I want you to ignore all the shit I said. I didn't mean any of it. Okay?"
You nod, resting one of your feet over his boot. "Okay."
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When you stand, ready to go up front, you see Billy turn back to the table and grab your water—for a quick drink, you assume—until you feel his hand slip under your shirt and an ice cube slides down your back.
"Oh! You son of a-" You shut your mouth as it slips onto the floor and a few curious eyes turn your way.
He shrugs, expression bored. "Thought you needed to cool off a little," he states, heading up front.
You grab two big cubes, praying they don't melt in your hands before you make it outside.
Once you have, you slip your hands down both the front and back of his jeans. His satisfied smirk is cut short when he hollers, wildly kicking his legs, trying to shake them out to no avail. "Oh, you're going to fuckin' pay for that," he says, picking you up, throwing you over his shoulder, smacking your ass.
Your head bobs, forehead nearly hitting his broad back. "Let me down!"
He spanks you again. "I don't think so. You've been a naughty girl and you're getting punished."
"You started it!"
"And now I'm finishing it," he says as his left hand comes up and yanks against your panties, tugging them down your legs. Oh God, you should've never worn a dress. But the heat here was nearly unbearable.
Your eyes go wide and you panic, worrying someone might see.
He slips them into his pocket, the skirt of your dress fluttering with each step he takes and you know your privates are on full-display.
He walks around to the side of the car, grabbing his leather jacket, and comes back around to the front, tossing it on the hood of the car. He finally sits you down—gently—on top of it, and he plants his palms on either side of you, leaning in for a kiss, one of his hands snaking between your spread legs.
You let him distract himself as you gently unbuckle his belt, and then pull it off of him in one swift motion, his pants falling.
You giggle as you watch him grab for them, yanking them back up.
He then looks at you with a raised brow, his palm extended to you. "C'mon, give it. You can take my clothes off later."
You go to hand it to him, then yank it back toward you, smiling.
His lip twitches. "Keep it up and I'll be putting you over my knee with it."
You give it to him then and watch as he slips it back through his belt loops again.
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After pulling away from the restaurant, Billy looks at you, foot on the brake. "You want to go see some cars?"
You roll your head in his direction. "Do I, or do you?"
He puts on a pair of shades. "I think you'll like it," he says, accelerating, heading back toward the highway.
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"What a fuckin' waste," Billy says, standing beside you.
You look up to him. "You were the one who wanted to come here."
"Who the hell sticks a goddamn Cadillac in the sand like that? You have any idea how much these things were once worth?"
You shrug, not particularly interested in that aspect of them. "I think it's neat."
He looks down to you. "Women. You would."
You walk around one of them, admiring other people's artwork. "Bite me."
"That an offer, honey?"
You walk over to another one, looking over the various shapes and swirls sprayed onto it. Then to the one next to it, glancing inside the cabin, but not much is to be found there. You wonder why someone would stick ten cars in the ground like this. Also wonder whether they harvested them for parts first. It would be a lot of wasted money, if not.
When you look up, Billy is three cars down, a black spray-paint can in one hand, while he holds his t-shirt over his mouth and nose with the other.
You walk over to him and watch as he finishes up his personal addition to one of the vehicle's doors: Billy ♡'s Y/N
He lowers his shirt, looking at you. "Think I could make it as an artist?"
You wrap your arms around his middle, lying your head against his chest, smiling softly. "Definitely not."
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Once the two of you are back in the car, Billy slides his hand up your thigh, smirking at the feel of your heat, knowing your panties are still shoved in his pocket. "Where to now?"
You shrug. "We could go back to the motel?" In all honesty, you just wanted to be somewhere with AC again. The car has it, but he always wants the windows down, for whatever annoying reason.
He shakes his head. "I don't want us cooped up in there all damn day." He studies you for a moment. "You want me to finally teach you how to drive manual?"
You look to him with wide eyes. "I don't think that's a good idea."
"You've got to learn some time."
"Maybe in an automatic."
He raises a brow. "Plan on ditching me for some city-slicker?"
"You're from California, Billy."
"That's neither here nor there," he states, turning the car over.
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Once Billy's found an empty parking lot to start your training in, he gets out.
He walks around to your side, opening the door, leaning down to you and motioning with his hand for you to get out.
You stare up at him. "What if...what if I 'burn up the clutch' like you said? Or I nick the paint or-"
He brushes his knuckles over your cheek. "You won't hurt it, baby. I'll be right next to you the whole time."
You shift in your seat, really not wanting to do this. "Which do you love more? Me, or your car?"
"Don't push your luck. C'mon," he says, grabbing your hand, pulling you out.
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Once you're in the driver's seat—Billy having already adjusted the seat so you could reach the pedals—and most certainly buckled in, you look nervously to Billy.
"This feels so fuckin' weird, being in the passenger seat in my own car," he mumbles, also buckling himself in. God forbid you panicked and laid on the throttle and smoked an electric pole.
He prays to God that doesn't happen.
He puts his left arm behind you. "Alright, press down on the clutch."
You glance down to the floor, then back up to him with a nervous smile.
"The one all the way to the left, honey."
You shove your foot down on the corresponding pedal.
"Now the middle one—that's the brake."
You let up on the clutch.
"No, keep your left foot on the clutch and your right one goes on the brake."
"Ok, sorry," you say, doing as he's instructed.
"Now, turn the key in the ignition while keeping your feet where they are."
With a slightly shaking hand, you do and the car roars to life.
He points to the shifter. "This car is a standard-h. There's only four gears. The 'r' stands for reverse."
You cock your head to the side. "I know that."
"Don't get smart with me right now." He continues. "Now, I want you to put it in first."
You do.
"Take your foot off the break slowly."
The car rolls forward only a few inches, then stops.
"Now, do the same with the clutch, also slowly. The car is going to start to roll. When it does, give it just a little bit of gas and please pay attention to where the hell you're pointing the front-end. Just...don't hit anything, alright?"
You slowly let up on the clutch, wheels rolling forward, and you grip the wheel tightly, sweat rolling down the back of your neck from nerves. You give the gas pedal a gentle tap and begin to drive slowly around the parking lot.
Billy glances to the speedometer. "Now, keep doing exactly as you are, but I want you to shift into second gear when you're ready. I want you staying around fifteen miles per hour for right now. You're going to take your foot off the gas and instead press down on the clutch again when you shift."
You press down on the clutch again, pulling the shifter back toward you.
"Good, now give it gas again and just drive around a bit like that. Just get a feel for it."
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After less than an hour, you feel far more comfortable behind the wheel than when you'd started.
You were no pro—not like him—but you knew more now than you had.
"Think I'm readying to hit the interstate yet?" You ask, smiling to yourself, shifting.
He smirks. "That's likely," he replies sarcastically. "Alright, go ahead and park it."
You hit the brake a little too hard, causing the both of you to lurch forward.
Billy grabs the dash. "Jesus. Easy, killer. I said park it, not give me whiplash."
You blush, putting the car into first and shutting it off. "At least it was the brake I laid on and not the gas."
"No shit," he says chuckling, unbuckling himself.
He leans over the middle of the car then, pressing his lips to yours, his left hand gripping your headrest, his right slipping under your dress, feeling you up.
You moan against his lips and his tongue slips into your mouth, exploring.
He cups your breast, kneading it in his palm, erection pressing against his jeans...and he slams his head against the roof of the car.
He pulls away, cupping the back of his scalp. "Fuck's sake. I'm not supposed to be the one on top, anyway. Alright, time to switch seats, doll."
He gets out, walking around to the driver's side, opening the door, and you step out and he climbs back in, then grabs your hand, pulling you inside. It takes a bit of struggling and a few curse-words on both your ends, but eventually he gets you to straddle him. He then reclines the seat back and begins pushing your dress up.
Your hands come down to rest overtop of his. "I...I'm not ready to-"
He reaches up, cupping your cheek. "I know. There's still other things we can do if you want to keep...exploring, though," he says with a smirk, growing harder at the thought.
Your eyes flit between both of his, considering, thinking, then you speak. "Never again."
"Never again," he agrees easily, pushing your dress up and off your body, lying it in the passenger seat.
He grips your hips, pupils dilating, licking his lips as he takes in your naked form.
"Now, how the fuck am I supposed to behave myself when I know what you look like under your clothes now?" He looks into your eyes. "You realize that when we're alone in a room together, I'm not letting you wear clothes ever again?"
You tuck a lock of hair behind your ear, blushing, smiling slightly.
His eyes trail over your breasts, down your stomach, to between your legs. "You're so fucking beautiful," he says lowly.
Heat pools between your legs.
You reach down then and begin unbuttoning his shirt.
"I can't believe you're finally mine."
You look at him.
He reaches up, cupping your cheek with his right hand. "Can you tell me that, angel?"
You bring your hand up to rest over the back of his. You turn your head to gently kiss his palm. "I'm yours."
He maneuvers his shirt off of himself, tossing it over with your dress.
"What now?" You ask nervously.
As much as he wants to bury himself inside of you, he knows he has to wait. He just hopes not long. Not because he was necessarily eager to 'just get laid', but because he wanted to make you his in every way he knew how.
He folds his hands behind his head, staring up at you. "Maybe I just watch you." He shrugs, lifting his hips to get more comfortable, then settling back down against the seat. "I think just this once I'd be alright with being a spectator."
You blink down at him. "You really want to do this here...?"
He glances around the empty lot, then back to you. "Mhm."
You reach down tentatively between your legs, keeping your eyes on his own.
You begin to rub your clit, whimpering lightly at the pleasant feel. You lean back some and jolt when the horn honks.
You look at him, now embarrassed.
He smirks. "Keep going, baby."
You start up again, closing your eyes, your hand circling between your legs, your other gripping his shoulder tightly.
You sigh, running your fingers between your soaked folds, then circling your clit again with your own self-made lubricant.
Billy suddenly inclines the seat again, wrapping his arms around you, taking one of your breasts in his mouth, his hands sliding down to your ass, squeezing.
Your hips jerk, and you settle again, wrapping one arm around his neck, craning your neck down, pressing your lips to his.
He moves his lips to your neck, your clavicle, your breasts, then back up again, sucking on the sensitive skin until you have a hicky.
You sigh his name and he brushes some hair away from your face. "That's it, darlin'. Just like that."
You press your lips to his, hips jerking yet again and you gasp against his lips.
"Shh, I know. You're close, aren't you, sweetheart?"
You nod, crushing your lips back to his, a low mewling sound coming from the back of your throat.
Your fingers begin to circle faster and faster, slipping between your legs, then back to your clit, your breaths coming in short, shallow gasps, you even accidentally bite Billy's lower lip at one point, but he just moans at the feeling.
"Fuck, do that again."
You do, gently biting down, then running your tongue over the now-sensitive spot, kissing him again and again.
And then, finally, you arch your back, crying out in euphoria, that bundle between your legs jerking under your fingers, pulsating.
You press your forehead to his shoulder, softly crying his name.
He slides his hands up your back, your skin slick with sweat, before cupping your cheeks in his hands, forcing you to look at him, your expression now serene, if not a bit sleepy.
"You're lucky I didn't finish in my fucking jeans just now."
You laugh.
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When you get back to the room, Billy glances to you with a smirk as he unlocks the door.
"You do know driving my car isn't the only thing I'm going to be teaching you, right?"
"You're such a perv."
He balks, dramatically placing his hand over his heart as he pushes the door open, arm holding it for you. "I was talking about teaching you to surf. Now whose mind is in the gutter?"
You bite your lip as you step past him, now embarrassed.
And then he slaps your ass as he shuts the door behind himself. "Seems I'm starting to finally rub off on you, huh?"
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You're very thorough as you shower, well and truly taking your time scrubbing every inch of yourself, shaving your legs and armpits, and giving yourself only a small trim downstairs. Once clean, you stand before the mirror, blow-drying your hair, then teasing it just as you had the other day. He'd liked when you did that.
You ignore your pounding heart and sweaty palms to the best of your ability. Maybe it's too soon. Maybe you should continue to wait. Maybe it'll be a mistake.
Or maybe, like Billy had said a few nights ago, that 'mistake' could turn out to be one of the best things you've ever done.
When you exit the bathroom, it's in nothing more than a towel and Billy glances from the TV to you with a smirk, the arm down at his side holding the remote, other arm across his forehead. "Guess I found something more interesting to watch," he says, turning it off.
You shift from one foot to the other. "Do... You said you have condoms, right?"
He stares at you for just a moment longer, then sits up suddenly. "What?"
You grip the towel more tightly. "I think I'm ready."
"In the car you said-"
"I know," you say quietly. "I...I kind of wanted to the other night. And in the car. I don't know what I'm waiting for, really. I always said I wanted to fall in love first and now I have, so..."
You trail off, glancing down to the carpet, then back up to him, finding him now seated on the edge of the bed.
He stands, coming over to you.
You look up at him and soften when he cups your cheek. "Are you sure about this?"
You nod.
He studies you for a moment longer, and then he steps over to his bag, unzipping a side pocket, removing a small, square, silver wrapper.
Hands trembling slightly, you drop your towel to the floor, thankful the curtains are already shut, only a small fraction of light streamlines across the bed which you lie down on, waiting for him.
You watch as he undresses and you can't help but think he, too, looks just a bit nervous. You wonder if he's ever been that before with a girl.
You don't ask.
He tears the wrapper open with his teeth, then rolls the condom over his already-hard length and walks over to you, crawling on top of you.
You spread your legs, letting him between them. You reach up, cupping his cheek and his gaze softens.
You feel his erection brush against your inner thigh.
"I know you said you were sure-"
"I am," you say, lifting your head, pressing your lips to his.
He then reaches between your thighs, ensuring you're already wet. And his fingers come away soaked.
You keep your arms wrapped around his neck as he rubs the tip of himself against you, then slowly begins to ease inside.
It pinches for a moment, rather painfully, and you bite your lip at the feeling, but once he's past that threshold and buried in your sweet wetness, it feels...wonderful.
When you look up at him, it hits you all at once. How just over a week ago you'd been sitting in class absolutely hating his existence, his very presence, and now here you were, completely in love with him. His heart had belonged to you all along.
You wonder if he would've run away with anyone else—would've made such a quick split-second decision to leave it all behind, with only you at his side. Would've protected, and provided for, and looked after, and chased down another like had you.
You were it for him, and it's in that moment of you looking up at him, into his eyes—tears shimmering in them—your bodies joined together as one, that you know he is for you, too.
"You're mine," he whispers, voice husky, quiet.
He begins to gently rock his hips against your own.
"Yes," you sigh, lifting a leg onto his strong back.
"I'll never love anyone else the way I love you, not after everything we've been through. Only we understand each other. No one else ever could—will. You're mine. Forever."
You nod, a tear slipping down the side of your face. "Forever."
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When Billy finishes, he's unsure that he's ever felt so happy in his entire life. The only thing that could compare was the feeling of the ocean under his feet.
Finding you was finding the missing part of him—a piece of a puzzle he hadn't even been aware he was trying to solve, falling into place, squarely into his heart. Slowly, you were mending him back into one completeness of a man.
He lays on his side, looking down at you, smiling. "So, did you, uh..." He trails off, nodding lightly.
You reach up, brushing a curl away, smiling slightly, but he can tell something isn't right.
"Not...really."
His brows furrow.
"No?"
You shake your head lightly. It wasn't his fault. Sometimes things just took a bit more effort for a girl, right? "No."
He lays on his back, wondering what the hell he'd done wrong.
Admittedly, he'd finished a bit more quickly than what was typical for him.
"Alright, just give me a minute," he says, closing his eyes, trying to concentrate.
You lie beside him, looking over at his naked body. "It's okay. I can just-"
His eyes open. "No, I want to be the one to do it."
You grow quiet.
He then sits up. "Fuck this, we'll do it another way, then."
He kneels at the end of the bed, gripping your hips, pulling you toward him.
You sit back on your forearms, looking down at him. "Billy, what're you-"
You lay back down again. "Oh God," you said breathily as his hot mouth lowers onto your sex.
He eases your legs over his shoulders, flicking his tongue against your clit, then spearing it, fucking you with it.
You grip the sheets beneath you, arching your back at the amazing feeling.
He eases two fingers inside you, arching them upward just like the other night—since you'd seemed to enjoy that so much—and he continues to suck against your clit, bothering to even trace the alphabet along it.
You close your eyes, brows furrowed, skin hot, nipples hard as your back arches atop the soft mattress.
He gently grips one of your hips with his free hand, then reaches up, twining his fingers with your own.
"Ah, I love you," you say in a whisper, squeezing his hand.
He plants a few kisses to your pussy in reply. "I love you, too, baby." He then goes back to teasing that sensitive nerve bundle with his experienced tongue.
Your thighs tighten around his head and he knows you're close.
He traces his name with his tongue, and just as he's halfway through 'Hargrove' do your eyes pop open, your back arching, your hand squeezing his fingers so hard he's sure you might just break one as you scream his name as you climax. He really fucking hopes the people staying next to you heard every second of it.
As you come back down, head light and swimming, he stands, quickly throwing away the ruined condom, putting on a fresh one.
Your body is still twitching and sensitive when he looks down at you with a smirk. "So, did you cum that time?"
"Y-yes."
He positions himself between your still-spread legs. "Good, because I'm ready again."
Before you can even react and ask for a few seconds to catch your bearings, he sheathes himself.
"You're going to fucking cum this time."
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parisoonic · 2 days
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Your stuff is so cool! I've been looking through your older post and all the tutorials you've made and they're really helpful. I've always been kind of self conscious about getting into art so late, but seeing your stuff has really inspired me! I know I still have a long ways to go, but it's still nice to see how far others have gotten. I guess it's kind of a "Other people have done it so I can do it too if I keep going" kind of situation I guess! I don't know I'm not too great with words heh I adore all the tf2 and heavymedic art you do! I only got into tf2 a couple weeks ago, but the fandom has some amazing artist! I love seeing what everyone's done with the mercs. Sorry for the super long ask! Just wanted to say your stuffs pretty cool ^^
thank you so much!!! ;;; im working on a few more tutorials atm...yapping on line weight and quality, got one on the go about background reccession/atmosphere and some musings on 'suggested musculature' when it comes to faces but who knows when they'll be done ;; it's never too late to get into art! I only really started drawing at 16-18, then I took a massive break all the way until i was 23-24 where i started drawing again because I wanted to change careers from vfx/3D to 2d. Flash forward another 6 years and I decide I should probably learn how to draw people so I started this blog! I see so many folks on this website (and insta etc) with AWESOME art at silly young ages (well relative to my almost 30 haha) and it freaks me out sometimes i feel so old and untalented by comparison but i think that's an eternal artist anxiety lol.
Keep at it! - drawing is one of those things i'm not sure if anyone ever 'finishes' learning but there's definitely no timecap on starting! there's SO much to discover and learn across multiple different subject matters, styles and mediums :') lots of fun, indulgence and experimentation to be had!
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olderthannetfic · 2 days
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https://www.tumblr.com/olderthannetfic/751011464262860800?source=share
Seeing the numbers compared, I realized that you are right, anon. It's a privilege to be able to write long fics, regardless of them thinking they're unable to write short fics because short fics are mostly scenes so it's not that long fic writers are incapable of writing short stories, deep down, they don't want to. Maybe it feels wrong for them since they've made an impression they always write long fics, maybe they find short fics less impressive, or believe that people won't give the same feedback as when they post something longer.
But I would like to argue that longer doesn't mean it has a plot. I've read 80k words of a character getting tortured with no chance of figuring things out or getting out of that situation and ended quite the same as the start. I've read 25k fic of characters just hogging. These fics have no stakes, no crisis, no buildup, no development, nothing just series of the same scene over and over with different sets or different positions.
Fanfic is free and that is why you encounter things that are, in a way, out of the box and technically are not allowed in the publishing world. But that's the beauty of it. Is it really that big of a gap for people who can write long fics vs people who can only write short fics? Because of how free fanfiction is, most things are okay to do, including only being able to write plotless or short.
One reason why I get jealous of other authors who manage to write longer fics than me is because I was too busy at the time. I found a good system for myself (dedicating a certain time to finish a chapter and then uploading them as I edit and so on) and you can build your own. I think with the right system, anyone can do it.
Pantsers, plotters, and hybrids are equal to me and it's true because how do you know that a person didn't just recycle the same plot they use from their previous fics, thus being able to write different versions of that story? We've seen the viral meme abt fic writers recycling the same thing and a lot of people admit to doing it. Does this mean they're mediocre or bad writers? It's not like that's against the TOS or illegal. Nobody paid us to keep making fresh new ground-breaking stories. The quality of a fanfic is decided from how you treat it. Do you still like it even after five years? Do you think about it sometimes? Do you feel so ashamed you'd rather put it in an anon collection or close your acc completely and orphan it? Do you wish for it gone to the point you delete every trace of it?
It's not from the amount of kudos, hits, or comments, tho yes it is easier to find good ones if you filter by kudos but there are lots of underrated ones and I've DNF a lot of fics that are not to my liking but have high-kudos because people keep rec-ing it. I want underrated fics to be more popular but not because it needs to be popular but because I hope to be in a community with more like-minded people. Fanfic has no publisher, we can't earn from it so traffic is merely informative so it's the community that matters the most.
In fact, to tell you the truth, after 17 years of being in ao3, I've curated my tag very specifically and stopped using the fandom tag and went straight to the ship tag. I also mostly rely on bookmarks, private collections, word from mouth of people I trust or believe to have the same writing style and taste as me. So it was very niche and limited.
Lots of stories have plots but not all must be in your favor so you gotta figure what you like to start. Are you team canon divergence or AU? what trope do you like? Telling someone to stop comparing is ineffective. We always compare because that's how we communicate. But people feel inferior because they don't feel worthy of themselves. If you start to know what you want, it's easier for you to write more. Whether you're still stuck on making 1k-2k, etc, at least you don't waste your time feeling sad or down and you keep writing. That'll help stimulate your brain and you will improve.
(Also maybe just don't listen to authors who you think are humblebragging. Mute or block them if you need to because I know, to some people who are in the same fandom, these types of attitude have more context to it. Idk abt anon, but in some cases maybe they were moots or the account was owned by another fan they've encountered on tumblr or other social media often, a BNF maybe, or just a popular author that other fans praise or talk about often, and things could get personal. Shit can go south quickly in the community tbh)
--
There's definitely an art to condensing one's thoughts into only a few words.
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revunant · 9 months
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𝐃𝐘𝐈𝐍𝐆;
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                                          𝐡𝐨𝐰 𝐢𝐭 𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐤𝐬 -                                𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐭 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮.
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𝐅𝐑𝐎𝐌 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐎𝐔𝐓𝐒𝐈𝐃𝐄 𝐈𝐍.
It’s a process Jean knows well, and he’s almost upsettingly routine about it when he sees it coming. If you’re close enough to him that not only does he think you’ll have to experience it first-hand, but also would like to avoid subjecting you to unnecessary stress, he’ll probably make some effort to prepare you for what's to come.
You're familiar with dead bodies, at least on paper. I’ll be cold, I’ll have no pulse, I won’t be breathing. If rigor mortis never sets in, that’s a good thing. If it does set in, uh - I don't know what happened, but you might want to start planning a funeral. Lay me down somewhere that the cops can’t find me and wait. Hide me in the wheelie bin if you have to. I’m usually out for two or three days; if it’s longer, don’t panic. Be patient. Defying nature can take time. When I wake up, I’ll be confused. I might be scared. I’ll probably be bleeding, depending on what offed me. Don’t get too handsy, uh- actually, try to keep your distance. I won’t be capable of much, but I don’t want to hurt you, and if I'm scared enough, I'll probably try. If I start hurting myself, let it happen. Let me come down. I’ll remember who I was and where I am and things will be peachy again.
It’s simple enough, assuming you don’t want to know any more than that. He dies, he enters stasis, his body regenerates as much as it needs to in order to sustain life, and he returns. Jean would prefer that you avoid asking many questions about it, even if you have no intention of asking them out loud. But, for the sake of science, let’s go against his wishes.
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𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐆𝐎 𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃?
Ekt; the Chasm herself. Cihnem Lis'ekt, Spinewalker, is in some ways a very literal title - except the Chasm doesn't really have a spine. Dormant as she is (with no solid evidence that she's ever been awake) she's less of a deity and more of a plane of existence. A living, ever-growing, ever-shifting purgatory. She guides the dead to the next life as you might guide a bug onto a leaf.
Cihnem Lis'ekt are to her like the opposite of a vaccine. An intruder inoculated with an inert dose of her own blood, enough to make them unrecognisable. If the other dead are insects being ferried back outside, then Spinewalkers crawl unseen under her skin; are parasites. The relationship between goddess and champion is not a conscious one, or even a consenting one.
Jean refers to the act of returning to Earth as being rejected, but the truth is the Chasm never knows he's there. In fact, the Chasm lets him stay there forever.
Each death is infinite and mind-breaking. An average of two days in the real world equates to something without end in the Chasm. It feels like an impossibility for him to wake up somewhere else at all, having spent an eternity walking across her back, and an eternity isn't supposed to have a finish line.
The time there is spent walking. There isn't much else to do, but something about the landscape consumes him with both a compulsion to move forward and a dread of what his destination might be. The landscape is both constantly shifting, and completely unchanging. It's completely white, with a black sky, but at the same time it's brilliant with red and blue and yellow that make your brain bleed to look at. The ground is flat. The ravines are bottomless. The mountains break the sky open.
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𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄 𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐄𝐅𝐅𝐄𝐂𝐓𝐒?
Jean would say no, and he’d be anywhere between lying and mistaken, depending on the point in time at which you ask him.
There are lasting effects. In every way, there are lasting effects. His body suffers for it, his mind suffers for it, there’s every possibility that his soul suffers for it*, depending on your belief in souls. Beyond the lethal injuries themselves, the act of dying and coming back has a deteriorative effect, especially on his brain, notably the limbic system & anterior cingulate cortex.
This isn’t because of actual injury; rather due to the Chasm being a pretty extreme cognitohazard. As time spent in the Chasm accumulates, behavioural and emotional conduct deteriorate, among other things (empathy, self preservation, fear & pain processing, memory, etc.). The penalty from a single death is small, but there's no way of reversing the damage once it's been done.
Comparatively, the strain on his body is slight. When he was first inoculated, Ekt's blood caused so much damage to his blood vessels and heart that it killed him in a matter of hours - most tributes would not have come back from this kind of reaction, but Jean was fortunate (or unfortunate) to have been kept alive for long enough that by the time he died, he was already part of the Chasm.
His assumption is that every time he visits the Chasm, this circulatory damage gets worse, and this is why his body gets worse at keeping itself warm. What he doesn't know is that he's not really that much more susceptible to dying of hypothermia than a regular person would be, and that this chill is less about physical damage and more about his connection to Ekt, and his closeness to her frozen expanse. It boils down to this; how much of her blood is in his?
There are the expected things on top of this; wear and tear, lethal wounds, nonlethal wounds, result in scar tissue, chronic pain, missing pieces. Though Jean's body is a little more adept at healing some things, he's far from invulnerable. The only reasons he'd be harder to kill than a human not affiliated with Ekt is because it's near impossible for him to die from exsanguination (a gift from Ekt) and because he's horribly, horribly determined (completely unrelated to Ekt).
Something that can only be observed when comparing one reality's version of a Cihnem Lis'ekt to another's is what it is that has an effect on their brain. The hidden truth is that it's the pace at which they cross the Chasm's back. The further you travel, the more she reaches into you; the more she is part of you. The worse the dread gets.
Every time Jean dies, he gets closer to something. And it's scraping away at the things that make him human.
*Author note; some characters have noted that there is damage done to Jean's soul with every death. I say it like that because in his setting there aren't really souls as a separate thing from someone's mind and consciousness, and as such there's no canon to the effects on his soul, or what it looks like, or how it copes. Jean doesn't know, Jean doesn't want to know, and I think it's more fun for the characters who are able to see/sense souls to have their own interpretation. The same goes for his aura, or magical signature, etc, etc, etc.
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𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐃𝐎 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐑𝐄𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍 𝐓𝐎 𝐀 𝐁𝐎𝐃𝐘 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐃𝐈𝐄𝐃?
The rules, as Jean knows them, are as follows: he can be hurt, he can get sick (though most pathogens and parasites struggle to survive in his body), and he can die. He ages - or at least he thinks he does.
His healing factor is abnormal, especially after death, prioritising small-scale, widespread damage. Injury and abnormality on a cellular and chromosomal level are healed almost instantly; lesser injuries such as bruises, small wounds and sprains heal at a noticeably quicker rate; severe wounds and broken bones heal at a more-or-less normal one. Cancers stand even less of a chance than pathogens and parasites.
Mortal wounds, however, will heal at an accelerated rate while Jean’s body is still dead, up to (and, for security, a little past) the point required for it to sustain life again. Long-term mechanical damage is usually at least limited, if not negated entirely; though old wounds can still hurt, can still scar, and missing parts do not grow back.
In the event that his body is destroyed rather than just killed, life finds a way. It's not quite as gnarly as being stitched together from the exact ashes, or atoms, that once comprised his body. After anywhere between a few minutes to a few weeks, he wakes up, in an intact, uninjured, naked body.
And he always wakes up in the same place; on the dusty stone altar near which the traces of Ekt's blood were found, hidden in a cave near Mardin, Turkey. Beyond being existentially upsetting (what was he formed from? how did his life know which body to return to? how does he know he's still the same person?) it's, as you can imagine, a bit inconvenient. He tries to avoid this scenario if he can help it, but it's happened a couple of times in the last 15 years.
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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐀𝐍'𝐓 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐋?
This is the part Jean doesn’t like to think about, if he can help it. It's not, however, something he tries especially hard to avoid, partially because it's an entirely theoretical outcome. To him.
There are stories and even some depictions of Cihnem Lis'ekt reanimating with their ribcages wrapped around spears and axes and swords, like a tree growing around a fence or a sign or a gravestone. Stories of champions whose bodies simply didn't have it in them to close a wound and so tore holes elsewhere in order to patch themselves up, breaking down and sloughing off and rebuilding in an agonising and seemingly never-ending cycle.
Champions whose problem wasn't that they didn't heal enough, but that they healed too much; who rejected all medical treatment, and for whom a broken bone meant the bone growing out, through, and over the skin in order to prevent being broken again. Eldritch forms of stone man syndrome. Bodies twisting around and over themselves to guard their soft stomachs.
The reasons for these consequences, as with a lot of things related to Ekt and her champions, are unknown. Many Cihnem Lis'ekt could break bones and be impaled and contain foreign bodies without suffering any effects not seen in normal humans (Jean, for instance, in one reality, spent 50 years trapped in a cave-in, dying over and over with a pike in his side, and only got a nasty scar for his trouble).
It's suggested that these champions, though cursed to live out the rest of their days in some kind of agony, were Ekt's favourites. Not only did they survive the trials required to become her champion, but were believed to have been somehow actively chosen by the sleeping god; not only accepted, but picked out. The twisting cage that became of their skeletons, or the ever-shifting landscape of rifts and ravines that became of their flesh, was a power bestowed unto them, a mark of pride, a blessing.
Because they looked like Her.
Evidently, the Chasm, simultaneously asleep and inanimate and incomprehensibly non-human, doesn't know what a privilege is supposed to look like, probably doesn't know what causes living things pain; and rewards her chosen ones in ways that amount to horrific, lifelong torture. It's not known if she's able to love her chosen, but if she does, her way of feeling love is something that humans can never hope to comprehend.
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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑𝐂𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐖𝐀𝐘 𝐈𝐍?
It's known that ancient Cehim Lis'ekt had a different experience than the modern one does. The definite is that ancient champions, after making it through their gruelling trials, were revered and worshipped, treated as something between royalty and a messiah, while Jean was killed a few times for science and then used as an attack dog for several years, locked in a white room, barely eating or sleeping.
A bigger difference is that, judging by his reaction to Ekt's blood, he was never supposed to walk her spine to begin with. It's only by virtue of modern medicine that he stayed alive for long enough for her blood to take root in him. The Chasm doesn't seem to know the difference. Pieter, at least, didn't observe any great change in Jean versus his predecessors from millennia ago.
...Due to Jean not being a very reliable narrator, or test subject, and struggling to properly convey the things that Pieter couldn't figure out by observation alone. Ancient Cihnem Lis'ekt, while not all were chosen by Ekt, were at least accepted, or acknowledged, by her. They would die, and be turned away.
Jean, with only a few hours of life support, managed to sneak through her defences. She doesn't know he exists. He dies, and goes unseen. He trespasses. He wanders infinitely. Worse, still; the fact that he wasn't the one who forced his way in, but that someone else did it on his behalf.
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p1x1x · 4 days
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#momonina#kindof. embarrassed to post this one bc its just pure fluff lmao… theyre so LAME in this pic (/j)#i can hear mmk going ったく…#nn’s outfits are always soooo cute though#waaaaaah i love the fashion….#miiiight color it though..#edit incoming#future pix here#mmnn#<- decided the drawings of the two of em can have momonina in them but if it leans more romo than plato it has mmnn#bc i rotate them in my head so fast#but as the days pass i get really crazy over them being Not Romantic but still More than That#im losing my Mind tbh#the only thing im certain of is that mmk is definitely a lesbian all things considered like look at her LMAO#everytime i rewatch i do consider how gay her actions are...???#(i've been rotating mmnn around in my mind since ep 1 tbh... the codependency was tempting...!)#but i keep thinking abt mmk herself saying “i saw my past self in you” in like. ep 2 already... and it would linger in my mind#i had written in my notes a While back#like when ep 4 was airing#that it just felt like mmk was trying to be kind to her past self ykno#because she believed that the her now... had failed in her dream#so yknow... by giving the guitar she was trying to have nn continue that dream for her (leading into mmk “guiding nn”)#ofc nn gives back her guitar though and i thank that person on twitter everyday for putting it so well#LIKE AGHHH THEIR MEETING WAS FATE BUT THE ACTIONS THEY TOOK TO PULL EACH OTHER UP... KILL ME!!!!#the choices they make regarding themselves... of staying true to themselves... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhgjhg#idk how many people will see this edit so im just treating it like the void (haha Void) here#(i've made that joke multiple times to myself now#i still think about. how mmnn were drawn to the honesty of each other#and yet. didnt exactly recognize each other as an actual person yet?#nn loved void and so loved mmk for creating it and saving her life. so mmk was a savior to her
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jackgoodfellow · 1 year
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More WIPs from a project that was supposed to be a quick joke and is now A Whole Thing!
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Here is a preliminary Hikari, and Samo's big brother! He has also escaped his genre, and he is not aware that most of the things he says sound incredibly threatening! Although only Hikari seems to notice anyway. (Luckily for Hikari, he really is a nice guy!)
@adamofingolstadt - a Hikari for you! 😊
#wips#i escaped my genre#once I finish these pieces I will post them with full image descriptions#original characters#the brother character has the same issue as tatsu from way of the house husband. he's a sweet guy who always sounds like a murderer!#Ya know for the last 2 years or so I have been pouring my heart and soul into a graphic novel (link to drafts in my blog description;#I've been told they are fun to read!) but somehow I have posted less art from that than I have for this! 😅 at least as far as tumblr goes.#There's a bunch on ao3. all this is quite alright tho - Silly side projects are actually absolutely vital to keep my love of art alive#and in the long run it will actually help me build the skills and passion I need to finish my novel!#I'm just hoping i have the juice to finish all this stuff in the next week so I can get back to the novel#but I am ultimately subject to whatever the ADHD decides. I hope if I take a break from this that I do come back to finish my other pieces#I am getting faster though. I drew both of these pieces in one day and also have time to work on the comic.#today was a wildly productive day. tomorrow I am going to concentrate on being a vegetable. 😤#I must respect my body's rare gift of productivity by offering it rest and care.#I may change hikari's design a little bit but I think it's looking pretty good. added the ear piercings bc of the wonderful fan art I got!#honestly the fan art may be better than what I've made here - the bat with nails and the hands were SO good
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buckttommy · 2 years
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writersdrug · 1 month
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Simon Riley x Dog Sitter! Reader pt. 3
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Warnings: mild cursing, boredom, thas really it
A/N: Holy shit I cannot believe how much love this is getting, and it's so much fun to write!! I've decided to makes this a fully fledged fic instead of just a drabble, and I'll be posting it on ao3 too! Let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist! Also sorry if formatting changes, I'm trying to have some sort of order among my writing.
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Simon had never told you how long he'd be gone - which was fine, your flat was only a twenty-minute drive from his home, should you need to do laundry or get more soap. You had some freelancing logo-design work you could focus on in your downtime, and Simon had been gracious enough to leave a note on the coffee table with the wifi password. Truth be told, you imagined this would feel like a holiday: no more shitty bosses. You were your own boss, here. You could make your own schedule, as long as you made time for Riley.
You soon discovered, after moving into Ghost's house, that it was very much not a vacation. The interior of his home was so barren that it made you feel like you had been sent to an asylum. On your first day there, you managed to get a bit of freelance work done; after that, you tried watching the telly, but you couldn't drown the heavy restlessness in the back of your mind.
You decided to phone a friend.
"What's Riley like?" Leslie said through the phone, which was tucked under your ear.
"Military dog." You replied. You were lying on the floor next to Riley, stroking her fur as her head rested on your stomach. "So proper, I've never seen anything like it. You know- when I made breakfast today, I dropped some food on the linoleum- she didn't bat an eye. Girl just watched."
"That's amazing... you know Donald would have run to it like it was the first meal he'd been fed in years."
You laughed, making Riley's head bounce on your abdomen. "Mum has got to stop feeding them real food..."
"What about the client?" Leslie said, changing the subject. "Simon, was it? What's he like?"
"Honestly?" You began, scratching between Riley's ears. "A decent guy, don't get me wrong - but bland. Gruff. His apartment is, too."
"Just like ya mum always said." She snickered. "Can I see?"
You sighed. "Nah, I never checked if it was ok to bring people over. Not sure if he'd appreciate me giving you a tour. But I'll ask next time if you can visit."
"That's fair..." You heard her shuffling around on the other end of the line. "Well listen babes, I should get back to work. Got five left on my lunch break."
You groaned at the prospect of having to be alone in Simon's barren home again. "Alright... still on for this Thursday?"
"You know it! Nina's coming too."
You grimaced. "Whoop-tee-doo..."
"Oh, c'mon, I'll make sure she's civil. Love ya."
"She'd better be. Love you!"
The call ended with a click, and you let the phone slide from your shoulder with a sigh. You stared at the ceiling, running through what you could possibly do. You'd already had a shower at your flat before coming here, you'd done plenty of work...
Riley tilted her head up to look at you, sensing your frustration. You looked back down at her.
"What d'you and Simon do all day?" You asked.
She sighed and looked away.
Maybe it was time for a walk.
"Alright, Riley!" You said, pocketing your phone and sitting up. She scrambled up at the sudden movement; her eyes followed your every move as you stood, her stare expectant and excited.
"Fancy a walk?" You asked.
She whined and yapped, shifting her weight from one foot to the other.
You chuckled. "C'mon, then - before you and I both start going insane."
On your way to the closet to fetch her leash, she had nearly knocked you down to beat you there. You huffed, leaning down to grab your shoes and tug them on. She sat (im)patiently and watched, her tail slapping against the wooden floor.
"Alright, alright..." You laughed, grabbing her leash and latching it onto her harness. She obediently trotted to the front door and sat, waiting for you. You opened the door and stepped outside, confused when the leash tugged in your hand. You looked back inside and saw that Riley hadn't moved from her seat on the floor. She looked at you, ears forward and eyes eager as she waited for... something.
You looked at her, puzzled. "What's wrong, girl?"
She whined, pointing one foot up and thumping her tail against the floor.
Oh, right. Military dog.
"Okay, Riley." You said clearly, and she happily trotted out the door. You chuckled, locking the deadbolt behind you and beginning the much needed walk. She stuck right by your side, never passing you nor falling behind.
For the kind of gruff, admittedly shady man that Simon was, you noticed that he lived in a pretty nice area. If you told your mum where he lived, she'd blow a cap out of jealousy - the houses were neatly lined down the street, each one with a driveway and a small garden bed underneath the living room windows. Simon's was noticeably bare - Christ, even his grass was thinner than the other neighbors', how does one manage that?
You eyed his empty garden bed as you passed it. You wondered if he would let you plant a few things... just to liven up the drabness. A couple of Hostas, maybe some African Violets... you knew he wouldn't want too much colour, but he definitely needed something to brighten his home. Currently, it stuck out like a sore thumb against the other houses. Not to mention, it would give you something to slice through the boredom of staying here.
Eventually, the sidewalk led to the edge of a small patch of woods. A bridge stretched over the creek, which then led to a longer, winding path through the trees. You came to a halt, reading the sign next to the trail.
"Po-wee-hee-co park..." You mumbled and Riley stared at you with her tongue hanging from the side of her mouth. "Poeheko Park? You ever been here?"
She looked between you and the trail, sniffing the air. She licked her lips and whined.
"Suppose not, Simon's only ever dragged you around the block a few times, huh?"
She eyed the trail warily, but you could see her eyes brimming with eagerness and interest. You chuckled, reigning in her leash and starting over the bridge. "Time for an adventure!"
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Simon sat stoicly on the heli, eyes fixed on the wall across from him. His palms rested on his thighs, fingers splayed. He appeared calm and collected, focused on the mission that Priced had debriefed not too long ago.
Except, the mission couldn't have been further from his mind. He was thinking about you and Riley. We're you giving her enough attention? That was a dumb question; clearly you knew how much attention a dog needed. You'd done this before... but had you ever worked with a dog that had certain needs and medications? You never mentioned it during the interview, and he didn't remember to ask. What if you couldn't see the signs when Riley's pain was flaring up? What if you had forgotten that she needed pain medication?
He thought about texting you - but he quickly shut the thought down. He'd reserved texting for emergencies only, and he knew you were good at your job. There wasn't a moment of your life you hadn't spent around dogs, of course you would take perfect care of Riley.
"Honin' in, LT?" Soap's voice echoed through the coms as he took the seat opposite from Simon. He was relaxed, as if this was just another Friday for him - well, Simon supposed, it was.
"Always." Simon replied gruffly, focusing back on the mission at hand. He cleared his throat and flexed his fingers, trying to keep a cool composure.
"How's Riley doin'?" Soap asked. "Know I jus' seen 'er a few days ago, but- ye finally cave n' get someone to pet sit?"
Simon grunted. "'Course. Not gonna leave 'er alone that long, it'd be torture."
"Who'd ye get?"
"What's it to you?"
"Secret service? Ye snag one of the Royal Guards fer the job?"
"Jog on, Soap." Simon warned with a serious look, and Soap raised his hands in defense.
He couldn't tell Johnny about you. A fierce, possessive feeling in his chest told him not to. He knew Johnny had a thing for young, pretty things like you, and he refused to let you fall victim to his desires. In fact, he hated the thought of it.
But- who was he? Why was he being so protective over someone he barely knew? You were an adult, perfectly capable of making your own decisions. Why should Simon cockblock you and Johnny? So what if he wanted to shag you?
Mentally, he shook his head. No. Never. He'd lock you in his house if it meant keeping Jonny away from you. Even if Simon wasn't anything more than your client, he wasn't going to allow Johnny to get close to you. It would be too weird. You're his, after all.
...
Fuck.
He sighed and adjusted his position in his seat. You and Johnny didn't even know each other, for Christ's sake. He was overthinking all of this. You'd probably never even meet his team, why would you need to? You only ever have reason to spend time in his house, not on base. You just watch Riley, make breakfast in his kitchen, sleep on his couch, maybe his bed, if you're with the dog... using his bathroom, his shower...
He scowled at himself. Maybe hiring you was a huge mistake. You were too distracting.
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Taglist: @my-queen-rhaenyra-targaryen @jisungswiftie @sweet-tooth4you @kennyis-aloser @hyyyxr @lahniu @dory-98 @naradae @cum-tea-and-towels @boystepper @definitelynotaclown @your-wifes-boyfriend @ghostslittlegf @bossva @poppingaround @yannvi @katzykat @mileyraes @chocolate-noodles @jupiternighties @sadlonelybagel @rorysbrainrot @identity2212 @pricescontroversiallyyoungerwife @reevesdriver @kingshitonly @ghost4love @lilyofhoon @xxkay15xx @cosmic-nuisance4 @danielle143
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tetsumie · 9 months
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“𝐘𝐎𝐔’𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘” — 𝐏𝐓 𝟐
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read part 1 here!
pairing: kuroo x reader & kenma x reader
genre: hurt/comfort
a/n: hello !! sorry for being gone for soooo long D: i wasn’t doing well and was in a really bad place mentally.. (plus burnout 😓😓) but regardless tysm for all the love in the first part of this fic! i appreciate u all sm and i’ll work on getting asks in! thank u for being so patient w me !! luv u :D
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kuroo tetsuro
you woke up late today and weren't surprised that kuroo had already left for work by the time you woke up. but he did leave you a post-it note saying he made breakfast leftovers for you in the fridge.
you smile at the thought that kuroo took the time out of his day to make some food especially in the morning. however, as you're getting ready for the day, your eye catches the lunch bag that's sitting on the kitchen bar countertop.
"this idiot," you mumble, shaking your head with a smile on your face. you pull out your phone and shoot him a text.
y/n: thanks for the breakfast it was really good
tetsu: im glad :)
y/n: also you left your lunch at home stupid
tetsu: oh shit
tetsu: can you drop it off for me? i cant come home to pick up, im in a meeting rn
y/n: yeah that's fine
tetsu: thanks baby ill kiss u when i see u
tetsu: love u 2 the moon and back !!
y/n: ur so weird
y/n: love u 2 the moon and back <3
a few hours pass by and now you're taking the bus to head to kuroo's office with his lunch bag in hand. before leaving the house, you decided to swap his current lunch which was some leftovers with his favorite food, grilled salted mackerel.
you enter his office floor and are greeted by the office receptionist from the floor. "i'm just here to drop off some food for kuroo-san."
"oh yes, right this way," she stands up and opens the office door for you and points out where his room is.
as you're about to knock on his door, you hear his voice from the other side. "i'm not sure if i can come out tonight to eat kenma. y/n probably wants me home, you know how clingy they get sometimes."
your heart sinks to the floor.
has he always thought of me this way? clingy? i didn't mean to act that way? i just like being in his company. i didn't mean to be clingy. i didn't know he felt that way...
"anyways, i'll call you back kenma. i gotta get back to work. see ya later" he ends the call.
you take a deep breath, standing in front of the door, thinking about kuroo's words to his best friend. before you could even knock, the door opens and you're greeted by kuroo.
"oh y/n! you should've texted me you were here!"
you let out a laugh that sort of dies in your throat. "oh um i just wanted to surprise you that's all."
"come in, let's eat together. you can see the beautiful downtown view from here," he tries to usher you inside his personal office room.
you're a little uncomfortable so you hold yourself back from going on, "maybe another time, yeah? i gotta head back. i've got a lot of work to do with college and work and stuff."
"no yeah of course, i get it. work hard! but first..." kuroo smiles and before you can pull away, he kisses you on the head. "i'll see you when i get home. love you!"
too ashamed to even look at him as you walked out of his office, you just wave to him with your back facing him as you walked away.
you're now sitting on the bus on the way home, thinking about the way he called you clingy. "you know how clingy they get.." has he always thought i'm clingy? has he just been putting up with my annoying habits? i thought he liked the way i treated him. i didn't know he thought it was clingy.
you're trying to look back at your actions and now it's all coming back to you.
you're always trying to kiss him, hug him, cuddle him. you're always talking to him about random things from an occurrence at the grocery store to some new show you're watching. literally last night, you both were cuddling while watching a new episode of kuroo's favorite sit-com and you were running your fingers through his hair.
it all made sense.
you were clingy.
and he wanted space.
you were going to respect that.
kuroo comes home later that evening and announces himself with an "i'm home!"
you're on the dining table with the computer open, working on some new assignment and you smile at him. "welcome home," you say with a smile.
he's expecting you to get up and come over and hug him like you usually do but to his surprise, you continue to look back at your computer.
he assumes you're just busy and doesn't think much of it.
kuroo heads into the shared bedroom to unwind from his hectic day at work. he takes a shower and changes into some pajama pants and is now heading back to the living room to see what you're up to.
you're still sitting on the dining table with all your notebooks splayed out and computer open, working on what seems to be some really big project. he plops down next to you and starts squinting at the screen. he starts poking you to grab your attention from the screen.
"the mackerel was really good today."
"that's good."
silence envelops the atmosphere between the both of you until kuroo decides to speak again.
"what are you working on?"
"college stuff."
"maybe take a break now?" he suggests.
"i can't. it's due soon," your voice flat. "if you want dinner, there's some leftovers i made in the fridge."
"alright," he replies, getting up from the chair to the kitchen to warm up some food.
his shoulders droop a little. he was hoping to spend some time with you. but he is aware that something is off with you. he's not sure what it is but he knows something isn't right. you haven't given him a single kiss or even a hug since he's been back and your usual sarcastic remarks are gone.
you've barely even acknowledged his presence.
"maybe it's just an off day?" is what he convinces himself.
but those "off days" are starting to become more consistent.
you're out of bed before he wakes up in the morning and you barely talk to him when he comes home. you always end up sleeping after he falls asleep and he can't even stay up because of how exhausted he gets after work. the amount of physical affection has declined from you and every time he texts or talks to you, your replies are barely existent.
it feels like he's living by himself. when did it get so cold?
on the other hand, you think it's going well! you haven't been all up in his business lately. you're giving him the space he wants. you're hoping that kuroo is feeling much happier since you're smothering him less. sure, you miss getting to hold and cuddle him but this is what he wanted, right?
now that the week is over, kuroo is hoping to spend the weekend with you.
that morning, kuroo sets an alarm to wake up earlier than you in hopes of spending some extra affectionate time with you. however, the moment he wakes up, the other side of the bed is empty and cold.
he has no choice but to get out of bed to see where you are. there's no way you're up right now. at 7 am on a weekend? no way.
he walks out of the room and he feels his heart chip. you're sleeping on the couch, slightly shivering because the blanket you're using barely covers you. have you been sleeping on the couch this past week? why didn't i notice? kuroo begins to internally berate himself right now for letting you sleeping on the couch for this past week right under his nose.
with no hesitation, he bridal-style carries you back into the shared bedroom and tucks you under the duvet cover and comes back into bed.
however, you've already woken up and you sit up on the bed, startled. "w-what? where am i?"
he scoffs, "i brought you in our bedroom idiot."
"oh," you're now grabbing your stuff and climbing out to go back to the couch but kuroo stops you by grabbing your arm.
"where are you going?"
"to the couch?"
"but this is our bedroom?"
"no, this is your bedroom," you emphasize.
"y/n." his tone feels cold to you. "talk to me."
"we are talking, are we not?"
he starts scratching the back of his neck. "yes but you know it's not the same. what's going on baby?"
his hand to tries to reach your cheek to stroke it with his thumb but you turn away and immediately stand up from his bed. "it's okay kuroo, please go back to sleep. it's the weekend, you should rest."
his heart chips at the gesture. why are you avoiding him like this? what did he do? what happened to 'tetsu?'
"it's tetsu to you," he mumbles.
you open your mouth but shut it and cast you eyes away from his stare down at the floor.
"it's always been tetsu to you," he states.
you're still silent and he takes it as his queue to continue speaking.
"baby, everyday i come home from work and you barely acknowledge me. you're always busy doing 'college stuff' or something else. you barely hug me or even kiss me anymore. what happened? what did i do? did i do something wrong? did i overstep my boundaries? are you mad at me about something? please i wanna know what i did wrong so i can fix myself."
your heart softens at his words and you begin to immediately reassure him.
"there's nothing wrong with you... nothing has ever been wrong with you... i just want to work on giving you your space. i know that you think i'm clingy and so i wanted to work on just giving you room to breathe. i know i can be a little too much sometimes. i'm sorry for not realizing how clingy my actions were sooner. i'm sorry i-"
he immediately walks over to you and brings you to his chest, hugging you tightly. your eyes slightly widen. "don't you dare fucking apologize. it's not your fault. shit, it's never been your fault, baby. what made you even think that?"
in embarrassment, you mumble, "i heard you say i'm clingy to kenma. sorry i didn't mean to overhear."
"oh, my love," he pulls away and looks at you with a sad look in his eyes. "it's not what you think."
he sighs and he sits on the side of the bed and taps the bed space in front of him for you to sit down as well. "kenma's been trying to get me to go meet some new volleyball members to affiliate them with the jva and to be honest, i already have so much on my plate with the current affiliates, that i'm really trying to avoid going out for dinner with him. i'm trying to get one of my coworkers to go on my behalf to seal the deal but i can't find anyone willing to."
"i just used your name as an excuse. i swear on my life, i never really meant that. i never ever meant to hurt you."
still finding it hard to believe him, you mumble, "you don't need to lie.. i understand if-"
"y/n, i swear on my mother, i'm not lying," he interrupts. "every single fucking day, the only think i ever look forward to is seeing your beautiful face in my apartment. i look forward to your rambles about the new show you started watching or how the current professor you're shadowing is a douche. i love your bear hugs and i love the way you kiss me all over my face in the mornings. fuck, i love knowing that i get to go to sleep with you every night and i get to wake up to you every morning. i love you, just the way you are. please don't ever change yourself over some fucking lie i said."
"i'm so sorry y/n, so sorry for ever making you doubt my love for you," he intertwines his hand in yours and looks into your eyes. "i'll do anything to regain your trust.
he senses the hesitation in your eyes and honestly, he can't blame you. you've been harboring this guilt for a week and it makes sense that you're still feeling a little uncomfortable around him.
but to his surprise, you inch your way closer to him and hug his chest and the tears begin to fall. his body tenses and he feels so guilty about everything. he rubs reassuring circles on your back and kisses your head every few moments.
after you wipe your tears on his shirt, you look up at him and honestly kuroo hates to admit this but you still look gorgeous even with a tear stained face. he's grinning at you and begins to pepper your face with his kisses.
"love you to the moon and back," he whispers into your ear.
you chuckle and kiss him on the lips. "love you to the moon and back, tetsu."
in that moment, he swears to himself that he'll make sure that you never have to doubt his love for you ever again.
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kozume kenma
as the ceo of his own startup company, a youtube streamer, and a college student, kenma can almost never find any time to himself. the only time he really feels at peace is either when he's asleep or when he's with you.
but sometimes things get so hectic and suffocating, he just wants to be alone, away from the world.
after a long day of classes, you walk into your shared apartment and you can hear kenma talking from his bedroom/home office. you try to keep quiet not disturbing him.
in hopes of cheering him up, you decide what better way to do so by making his favorite food: apple pie. you put down your stuff on the living room couch, grab the apron, and get to work.
kenma stays locked up in his bedroom for the majority of time that you're baking and a part of you just hopes that maybe he'll come out to just say "hi" or just accompany you to see what you're up to but unfortunately he doesn't.
after the pie is done baking in the oven and you've brought him a slice so he can get some food in his system because you're sure he hasn't been taking care of himself. you're hoping that maybe, just maybe, the both of you will finally get to spend some time together.
you knock on the door twice.
no response.
you knock once more and call out his name, "kenma, you busy still?"
still no response.
you sigh, realizing there was no hope in knocking, and decide to twist the knob and enter his room. you're greeted with the sight of him sitting on his gaming chair, knees to his chest, headphones over his ears, and slightly biting the eraser top of his pencil.
he must have felt the presence of someone else in the room with him because he looked away from his computer screen and his eyes widened. he slid his headphones off his ear and hung them around his neck.
"how long have you been home?" he bluntly asks.
"for an hour or two now, i think," you reply.
“oh sorry, i didn’t see you,” he mumbles.
you chuckle in response. “i didn’t think you would considering you’ve been cooped up in your room the entire time.”
“well yeah,” he says. “i’m busy.”
as he’s about to put his headphones back on and get back to work, you speak up. “i know you’re busy but do you wanna eat with me? i made-”
“can we talk later? i don’t have time for your clinginess right now.”
oh.
he puts his headphones on and indulges himself back in his work, not even registering the weight of his words.
you slowly walk out of his room, silently close the door, grab yourself a slice of apple pie originally made for the both of you, and plop yourself on the couch to watch some new show on the television.
after working for nearly hours on end, kenma finally finishes the load of work he had piled. now all he wants to do is just spend some time with you before going to bed. he walks out of the bedroom and is greeted by you asleep with the television humming in the background.
he can't help but let a small smile envelop his features. it's such a domestic sight and he wants to photograph this moment in time.
he knows he said some harsh words to you out of frustration but he hopes that you understand that he didn’t truly mean them.
he goes over and kisses your forehead and he smells the distinctive scent of apple pie and his heart softens at the thought that you made him his favorite food.
he goes over to his bedroom, grabs a blanket and lays it over you and goes under the blanket, snuggling himself closer to you. he hasn't felt this relaxed in a while and your presence is just so comforting to him.
he doesn't know what he'd do without you.
the next morning, you wake up and find yourself in an awkward position and your feel arms wrapped around your torso. you look to your left and are greeted by kenma's sleeping figure and you can't help but smile.
but you remind yourself of what he told you yesterday and you silently get up from the couch and begin to get ready for the rest of your day.
his words, "i don't have time for your clinginess right now", really had sent you into a spiral last night and you were too exhausted to think clearly. did you always come off as clingy to him? you were definitely a bit more energetic and enthusiastic than him but you never thought it was clingy?
you can't seem to think straight so you decide to maybe go out for a walk, just to take your mind off things. you just need some time alone, away from your apartment with him.
kenma wakes up only a few minutes later and he feels cold. his neck is sore, considering how he slept in an uncomfortable position because he wanted to sleep with you. however, to his surprise, he doesn't find you asleep next to him.
as he walks around the house, calling your name, a sense of urgency begins to form in the pit of his stomach.
he dials your number and it goes to voicemail.
he does it again. still voicemail.
he's about to call you one more time until he hears the jangle of keys and the door opening. a sigh of relief leaves his mouth and as you're about to turn your keys to open the door, he's a step ahead of you, opening the door for you.
"oh my god, i thought you went missing," kenma hugs you, catching you by surprise. "where'd you go?"
hesitant to reply, you say, "oh just went on a walk, that's all."
"you should've told me, we could've gone together," he states. "i feel like we haven't seen each other in forever."
"it's fine. don't worry about it."
there's something wrong and he can sense it in your demeanor. as you're heading to the master bedroom, he can see the way your shoulders slump as you put your keys back. he doesn't address your distant behavior, thinking that you're just having a rough morning and it'll get better as the day goes on.
unfortunately, it doesn't get better.
you seem to be fine but you just feel incredibly distant.
kenma's been playing games in his room all day and unlike usual, you're not in his bedroom watching him play or sitting on the bed scrolling through your phone. his gaming experience isn't the same when you're not there.
he pauses his game and goes out to the living room to see you lying down on the couch, scrolling through videos on your phone. he wants to ask why you're not staying with him but he doesn't want to make overstep your boundaries, especially since it seems like you're not in a good mood.
but that's anything from what you want.
you want him to ask you to stay in his room and keep you company. but because he hasn't done so, his word "clingy" began to scream louder in your head and to be frank, that's the only thing roaming in your head.
"do you want to do anything today?" he asks. "you know.. because it's the weekend and we can go out if you want? like going out to eat?"
a part of you began to feel guilty considering he was thinking about what you wanted to do and you hated feeling like a burden towards him. he already expressed his disapproval with you when he said he found you clingy so you didn't want to impose any further.
"no it's okay," you reply, eyes glued to your phone. "i don't want to annoy you or anything.. so i'll just go on my own or something..."
he hums in response but his eyebrows furrow as he doesn't seem to move from his spot. he can tell there's something wrong and you're obviously being very dodgy with him about the subject which is why he decides to take a seat on the couch and snatch your phone from your hands before you can even register what's happened.
"hey give me back my phone!" you sit up, stretching yourself over to grab your phone back from him in a failed attempt.
"not until you tell me what's wrong," he says flat.
you sigh, knowing that this conversation isn't inevitable. you can't avoid him forever "you called me clingy yesterday, kenma. sorry that i don't really want to hang out with you right now."
the words that leave your mouth have kenma in a state of shock. you took that seriously? you really thought he meant that? in order to ease his busy day of meetings back to back, you came home baked him some apple pie to ease him from his stresses.
and what did he do in return? called you clingy when you just wanted to spend some well-deserved time with him. god, he was being so ungrateful. his body fills with guilt when he he realizes you took his comment to heart.
“honey, i-” he starts and then is cut off with your words.
"i understand where you were coming from, i like to show my affection with you through physical touch and i know you’ve never been one to really reciprocate that," you begin to ramble. "so i’m really sorry for pushing your boundaries and i’ll give you the space that you need."
guilt is eating him away and he needs to clear the air now, otherwise you might be closed off forever and he’s not sure if he’s ever going to be able to reconnect with you.
“y/n, honey, don't apologize for this. it’s not your fault at all,” he starts. he puts down the phone onto the couch and grabs both of your hands and squeezes them assuringly. “i'm sorry for pushing you away and calling you clingy. you didn't.. you never deserve to be told that."
his hand finds its way to your cheek and he begins to rub comforting slow circles. seeing the sullen look on your face made him realize that he never wants to see you like this ever again. it was like you had lost the light in your eyes. kenma hated how he had diminished that so quickly by making you think that he didn't like your company.
he loves you so much; he could never imagine what life would be like without your presence.
a small smile begins to creep back on to your face and kenma finds himself in a slight sense of relief.
"it's okay," you finally utter out. "do you wanna watch that new episode? apparently there is so much drama now and i'm avoiding socials so i don't get spoiled..."
he chuckles, "i'll do anything with you."
he knows that he can't take back his words from before but as he's sitting on the couch with you in his embrace, he knows he can show you his love through his actions. he'll do anything to bring back that trust to you.
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© tetsumie 2023 all rights reserved 
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3K notes · View notes
kiss-inthekitchen · 3 months
Text
no vacancy | spencer reid
pairing: spencer reid x reader
set sometime in early s2; you get stuck sharing a room with your favorite boy genius who absolutely cannot know that you have feelings for him. and also, there’s only one bed. fluff, f!reader (i think there's only two usages of gender markers)
word count: 4.7k
notes: this is a rework of a very old fic i used to have up on ao3. i'm thinking i'll do more of these, i've got a few spencer fics in the vault and it was fun to rework this and see how my style has changed :)
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You shivered against the cold desert air. Twirling a keyring around your finger, you headed for the door marked 3. You were exhausted from the day and so, so ready to collapse into bed as soon as you got inside your room. 
You turned the key in the lock while Spencer waited behind you. It was late, and you and the team had pulled into a motel for the night, having been dragged out to a tiny rural town by the unsub after days of tracking him through surrounding areas. He’d been apprehended, finally, and handed over to local police around midnight. You all had decided it best to spend the night before driving back into town in the morning for take off. 
So here you were, at one of those single story motels that still used actual keys instead of key cards. Given the time of night, you knew vacancies would be scarce, so you’d already expected to have to double up on rooms. Gideon had stayed behind at Quantico, leaving Hotch and Morgan in one room and JJ and Prentiss in another, with you and Spencer sharing the last room. You’d hung back while JJ got everything figured out with the concierge (who was just a bored looking kid posted at the desk), and then she’d passed you your key with its little keyring attachment listing the room number and you all bade each other goodnight.
You’d been on the team nearly a year already, but you were still the rookie compared to everyone else. Even Spence had two years on you. But seeing as you two were the youngest, and the least inclined toward the more physical parts of your job– the chasing, tackling, firing your weapon parts– you were paired off with him more often than not. 
You weren’t complaining. You’d come to know Spencer pretty well, and you didn’t feel much apprehension at the thought of sharing a room with him for one night. 
That is, until you opened the door. 
“Oh,” you said involuntarily.  
"There's only one bed,” Spencer said. 
“Sure looks that way.” 
"At least it's a queen?" 
There was a brief pause before you both started speaking at the same time. 
"Maybe we can go back to the concierge–" Spencer began. 
"I mean, I guess I don't really–" 
"–although, JJ did say we got the last–" 
"–mind as long as you–" 
You cut yourself off this time. It’s not like there was another good option, unless one of you wanted to sleep in the car. "This is fine?" it came out as a question rather than a statement. 
"I think so? I wouldn't want to– to make you uncomfortable or anything."
"This is fine," you repeated, more sure of yourself this time. “And you don’t make me uncomfortable.”  
It was only kind of a lie. You trusted Spencer with your life, of course. But he also made you nervous. He was sweet, kind, always seeming genuinely interested in anything you had to say. And of course, anyone could see that he was attractive. You were developing feelings for him, and in a job where your coworkers and your crush himself were all adept at reading people, it really wasn’t a good position for you to be in. You just hoped Spencer was as oblivious with women as Derek made him out to be. 
"We should get out of the doorway," Spencer suggested, and you realized you'd been standing in the threshold this whole time.
"Right."
The two of you walked in, Spencer closing and locking the door behind you. It was a modest room in a tiny town; your standard ugly-patterned, faded bedspread draped over the queen bed in the center, a window looking out into the parking lot, and a dresser that didn’t even have a TV on top of it. You headed straight for the bed, sitting on the edge and removing your shoes while Spencer stood by with his hands in his pockets.
"You know, if it's a problem I can sleep on the cou– uh, the chair," Spencer offered, looking back mid-sentence and realizing that the only additional furniture this motel offered was one rigid looking armchair by the window. 
"No, you're not doing that."
"What?" he asked, taken aback by the quickness of your response.
"You're not sleeping in that chair. It looks horribly uncomfortable and I’m sure it’s never been cleaned, and I know how you’d feel about that.” 
Spencer grimaced, not having thought about that particular detail. “Yeah, but, I mean… I’d do it for you.” 
God, why did he have to say stuff like that? Like you were something special. And why now, when you were stuck in the same room with him until morning? It probably didn’t even mean the same thing to him as it meant to you. He was one of the most caring people you’d ever met. He’d probably say that to any one of you on the team. 
Or maybe sleeping in a chair meant nothing to him at all. Maybe he actually didn’t want to share the bed with you and that’s why he was trying so hard to avoid it. 
Ugh. You just wanted this day to be over. It was late, the case had been a week long, and now you were probably in for a fun night of overthinking and second guessing when you’d been expecting silence and easy, dreamless sleep. 
Okay, maybe that last part was never really an option, but still. 
“Look,” you sighed, “I know this isn't an ideal situation but there's a perfectly good bed here, so let’s just share it. If you’re okay with that. It's just one night and tomorrow we'll be back home and nobody has to know about it."
You had to fight from squeezing your eyes shut in regret. You wished that had come out differently. You chanced a look at Spencer, realizing that you’d been staring down at the faded carpet pattern while you spoke. 
The look on his face was one you hadn’t seen before, and you almost couldn't place it. He seemed sort of disappointed. Disappointed that he had to share a bed with you? Or that you'd made it sound like you didn't want to share a bed with him? Nope, you could not go down that road tonight. You shook your head once as if it would clear the thoughts from your tired mind. 
“I’m okay with that," he said, casually enough that you could almost convince yourself that you’d just imagined the look on his face before. "So, do you want the shower first, or...?" Spencer asked.
"No, I can wait, you go ahead," you said. You desperately needed the moment to yourself anyway.  
You started rifling through your bag for pajamas, toiletries, and your charger as an excuse to look busy while Spencer made his way into the bathroom with his things. As soon as the door closed behind him, you flopped back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling as if it might hold all the answers. 
Spencer couldn't know about your feelings. For one thing, you were pretty sure there was a rule against dating your colleagues in the BAU. If not, there probably should be. You were such a close knit team, and if anything went wrong… you couldn’t imagine how difficult that would be. But then, the evil and uncooperative part of you also couldn’t help but think that things might go right. 
From the beginning of your time at the BAU, you’d been drawn to Spencer. It just kind of made sense. You’d gotten through school at an accelerated pace– though not as quickly as him, the man was on another fucking level when it came to academics– and you were one of the only people who found his fact dropping actually interesting, often asking him follow up questions. He’d looked adorably shocked the first few times you’d done that. 
He listened intently to your passionate rants about your favorite films and tv shows, even though he hadn’t seen any of them. When the two of you had discovered a shared interest in mythology and folklore, Hotch nearly had to separate you so you would actually get some work done. It was like you were a kid in school again, and you might’ve been embarrassed if you didn’t find it so funny, if you weren’t so giddy at the idea of a friendship that could make you feel like a kid again. 
Spencer understood you in a way that other people didn’t, laughing at your jokes even when they didn’t land for anybody else. When people interrupted or spoke over you, he always paid attention, and in situations where you were trying to add details to the profile he’d bring the conversation back around to you. 
Throughout your life you’d learned– through painstaking trial and error– to fit in pretty well in most any group you found yourself in, but you’d always considered yourself to be a little weird. A little too different. But when you were with Spencer, you felt like you didn’t have to try so hard. You could both be a little different, together. 
Spencer opened the bathroom door then, startling you. You’d been so lost in thought you hadn’t even noticed the water turn off. You looked over to see him wearing a loose white t-shirt and pajama pants, his hair still damp. And now you knew what Spencer looked like fresh out of a shower. And of course it was endearing as hell. 
“If that’s how you’re planning to sleep,” Spencer began, referencing how you were laid out in the dead center of the bed, your arms fully outstretched and hands hanging off the mattress, “then I think we might have a slight problem after all.”  
You walked out of the bathroom a short while later, dressed in your usual sleepwear of shorts and an oversized shirt. You’d put your hair up in a bun to protect it while you showered, and now it hung loose around your shoulders. You simultaneously wished your outfit was cuter and uglier; knowing your giant t-shirt wasn’t flattering your figure while also feeling like you had too much skin exposed. Not that it mattered. You were just going to get some sleep and then wake up in the morning and head home. Everything would be back to normal. 
Spencer’s in bed already. He’d turned off the big light while you were showering, the lamps on either side of the bed casting him in a softer, warmer glow. He looked up from his book to find you standing there, and the soft, familiar look in his big brown eyes had you rooted to the spot. 
“Hey,” he said softly, patting the space next to him in invitation. 
You conceded, finding your legs again and sliding into bed beside him. “Hey.” 
He fidgeted with the pages of his book, ultimately shutting it closed on his index finger to mark the page. “So, uh, are we okay?” 
“Yeah, of course,” you answered genuinely, feeling bad that your internal struggle had manifested in a way that worried him. 
“Okay, cool,” he said. He paused long enough to let you explain if you wanted to, another invitation. You knew he wouldn’t push it if you didn’t offer something up. You wanted to give him an explanation, but you couldn’t bring yourself to. 
“Sorry,” you managed. 
“For what?” 
“I don’t know… acting weird, I guess. It’s just been a long day.” 
“Oh, well, you don’t need to be sorry about that. You’re always weird.” 
Your mouth dropped open as you looked at him. “Look who’s fucking talking,” you scoffed. Some of the tension dropped from your shoulders, glad he hadn’t questioned you further. 
“Language, please,” he held up a hand to stop you. “I’m delicate.” 
“Wha–?” you let out a surprised little laugh. “You’re an idiot!” 
“Yeah okay, tell that to my I–.” 
“Oh, my IQ of 187,” you finished for him, rolling your eyes. Even that was full of endearment. “God, you are so annoying.” 
“Hm. Y’know, this might be a long night for you. I’d hate to keep you up with my annoyingness.” 
“I feel like you could’ve come up with a better word than annoyingness, Mr. 187,” you tilted your head where it rested against the headboard, looking up at him. 
“Oh, she’s being a smartass now!” he split into a surprised grin, and you could swear your heart skipped a beat. 
“You just said ass.” 
“Wow. How quickly you’ve corrupted me.” 
“Right, of course. It’s my fault.” 
“I knew you’d agree.” 
“Shut the fuck up,” you laughed. 
Things felt a little bit more normal after that, joking around with Spencer like you normally did made the rest of the night feel less daunting. 
Shortly after that, the two of you agreed that you should get some sleep, each reaching over to turn out the light on your respective sides of the bed. 
You let yourself sink into your pillow, the exhaustion you had been feeling giving way to a hyper awareness of Reid’s body next to you. You were kept awake, completely overcome by the foot of space between you and Spencer; the consequences of crossing that space, the way it might feel, the curiosity over whether he was laying awake too, thinking the same thoughts as you. Even with that foot of space separating you, you could feel his body heat. You longed to move closer to him, to touch him, to let his warmth seep into you and lull you to sleep. 
But you didn’t, and you wouldn’t, because this was just an unfortunate booking mishap. It didn’t mean anything. Tomorrow it would be over, and you could more easily go back to hiding your feelings from everyone else and yourself. 
Eventually, exhaustion won out. 
You woke what could’ve been a few minutes or a few hours later, the sky still dark. You couldn’t tell what exactly had woken you up, only the sense that you’d moved, almost like you’d fallen. But fallen from what? 
You blinked in the dark, the street lamps in the parking lot providing enough residual light to keep the room from being pitch black. 
Reid was sitting up. He must’ve bolted upright, you thought. Had that been what moved you? Were you lying on him?! 
“Hey, you okay?” 
“Sorry. Just a nightmare,” he said as if it was nothing. “Sorry to wake you.” 
“What was it about?” you ignored his apologies, sitting up as well. 
“I don't really even remember,” he breathed, almost like it was funny. “Just having a physiological reaction to whatever it was, I guess.” 
You had nightmares too, of course. You all did. You hated remembering them, but you also hated the times when you woke up in the dark, dazed and inexplicably scared. Without thinking, you reached for his hand. 
He turned to look at you then. “I really didn't mean to wake you,” he reiterated. 
“I figured,” you smiled slightly. You noticed his breathing was just a bit too fast. You rubbed your thumb over the back of his hand, leaning over to rest your weight against his side, your head on his shoulder. His nervous system would regulate itself quicker this way. 
“You were on my pillow, by the way.” 
“What?” you ask, your head jerking back from him. 
“I totally called it. You rolled right into the center of the bed in your sleep. Total bed hog.” 
“Hey!” you protested, pulling your hand back from his in embarrassment. So you had been lying on top of him. Or at least really close to him. His hand chased after yours, finding you again. 
“That wasn’t me complaining about it.” 
“Oh,” was all you could think to say back. 
It was quiet for a minute. You let your head fall back onto Spencer’s shoulder, but your heart raced in your chest. 
“Can I ask you something?” he questioned, his tone becoming more serious. 
“Oh– of course,” you answered, your brow creasing. 
“What did you mean when you said ‘it’s not ideal’ and ‘nobody has to know about it’?” 
“Wh– I– Spencer, come on.” 
He didn’t give you an out this time. Just waited for an answer. 
“I don’t even really know,” you sighed.  
“I believe you’re being partially truthful about that.” 
“Don’t profile me.” 
“I’m not. I just know you.” 
You sighed. “You know, sometimes I hate that stupid memory of yours.” 
“I don’t need an eidetic memory to remember that. It was a weird thing to say, and it happened like four hours ago.” 
“You’re guesstimating. And it wasn’t that weird.” 
“Maybe not, but the way you said it was. And you’re avoiding my question.” 
You continued to avoid it, biting down on your bottom lip. 
“And you stuttered when I brought it up.” 
“I told you to stop profiling me.” 
This time, he just hummed in response. 
“And so what if I stuttered?” 
“Stuttering is usually more my thing. A nervousness thing.” 
Maybe this was actually your nightmare. Maybe you’d wake up soon and none of this would’ve been real, and you wouldn’t have had to explain to Spencer that the reason you’d had an attitude was because the situation tonight had made it harder to hide your feelings for him. Big feelings that became a lot harder to ignore when he was this close to you, still holding your hand, the mix of scents from his detergent and deodorant clouding your judgment. Of all the embarrassing scenarios that you could’ve imagined playing out tonight, this was very high up on the list. 
“I said ‘it’s not ideal’ because it’s not, just by definition. We were supposed to get a double room and we didn’t. Not ideal. And I said no one has to find out because I can already see Morgan having a field day with it and I know the exact expression that’ll be on his face–” 
“The eyebrows,” he nodded, lips pursed. 
“And then everyone else will get in on it and I just figured…” you sighed. “I don’t know. I didn’t want to deal with that.” 
“That all makes total sense.” 
“Good,” you breathed. Too relieved. 
“Now tell me the rest of it.” 
“God, Spencer–” you huffed out, frustrated. He knew you too well. 
You wanted to run. Maybe you could go sleep in the car after all. And then ignore Spencer for the rest of the day, and then the year, and your life, and– 
“Don’t make me say it,” you breathed. This had to be a dream. 
“But there is something to be said?” he questioned, his tone hushed, almost reverent. 
It was just vague enough. You could pretend it was nothing. 
“Yes.” 
You felt like you’d just blown your life up with one word. 
Spencer took a deep breath, your body cresting and falling with the movement of it. 
“You make me feel better about being myself,” he confessed.  
You shut your eyes. You had a constricting feeling in your throat suddenly, and the awful realization that you might cry. 
He spoke again, because you couldn’t. “I haven’t always felt good about it, you know? And then you joined the team, and, well– you changed a lot of things for me. And you’re beautiful, obviously, and I was scared to mess up what we have, because it’s special, I think–” 
“It is.” 
“–and then you started freaking out when you saw the bed,” he was smiling now, you could hear it, “and I thought, maybe it wouldn’t be so crazy… maybe I could make you feel that way too.” 
“You do. Of course you do. I feel like I can be my full self with you. I don’t know that I’ve ever felt like that before.” 
Spencer laughed, a little delirious giggle, and squeezed your hand in his. You’d managed to avoid crying, thankfully, and you grinned along with him, looking down at your joined hands as you squeezed him back. 
Things seemed to still for a beat, the two of you sitting with this moment and letting it stretch out. You still couldn’t really believe this was happening. You might have to tell Spencer to pinch you. 
“So what does that mean for us now?” you asked. 
“Well, for right now at least, I think it just means that we can go back to sleep without overthinking things into oblivion.” 
“I was not–”
“Okay, this time I am profiling you, and you’re lying,” he cut you off, his smile still evident.  
“Oh, this was such a mistake.”
He continued like you hadn’t spoken, laughing a little as he went. “I could practically hear it. It’s like, you know when a computer is trying to use too much processing power and the fan starts whirring really loud? Like that but just like right next to me, like tangible—“  
“Okay! Thank you so much, I actually totally got it, you can stop now.” 
He laughed, and your cheeks warmed. 
“For the record, I meant we could both stop overthinking.” Then he shifted a little, facing you a bit more. With the hand that wasn’t holding yours, he brushed a strand of hair from your face, a fake pout on his lips. “Sorry I make you nervous.” 
You cackled at that, if it was possible to cackle in hushed tones. “Oh, I bet you are. Besides, I know you like me now, so you’ve lost that card.” 
“Are you certain of that?” 
“Certain that you like me or certain that you can’t make me nervous?” 
“The latter. I do like you, if that was unclear.” 
Your heart sped up, contradicting you as you answered, “Then I’m certain you can’t make me nervous.” 
He titled your face up to his then, using his index finger underneath your chin to make you look at him. “You’re an awful liar.” 
You just shrugged, watching triumphantly as Spencer’s gaze fell to your lips.“It’s been working out pretty well for me so far.” 
“I guess it has,” he murmured, closing the distance between you and finally kissing you. 
After so many months of imagining (and berating yourself for imagining) what Spencer’s lips might feel like on yours, you weren’t disappointed. 
For once you didn’t have to think at all, the chemistry between you and him drowning out everything else. His hand fell to your waist, and yours moved to the curve of his jaw, pulling him closer as his mouth moved against yours. Your teeth grazed his bottom lip and he gasped, and your skin felt like it was lit up from the inside. 
You pulled away to breathe, and to process, and to try and stop your head from swimming. You were rewarded with the awestruck look in Spencer’s eyes as he opened them again. 
“Okay, was it just me, or–” 
“That was crazy,” you breathed.
“Crazy,” he agreed. 
“Spence?” 
“Yeah?” 
“I don’t think we’re getting back to sleep tonight.” Your eyes widened at the implication of saying those words at that time. “Not, like, in the sex way, though,” you hurried to correct yourself. “I need like, 4-5 business days to process things first, and I– well, I just meant, like– you know?” 
Spencer was nodding at you even as his eyebrows pulled together in a frown. “Can I still kiss you during those 4-5 business days?” 
“Oh, yeah,” you said, sounding breathless. 
“Cool,” he agreed. “You seem really nervous, by the way.” 
“Well, you kissed me.” 
“I did.”  
“How were you not nervous?” you breathed. 
“Oh, I was. Your reaction is making me feel a whole lot better about it though.” 
You scoffed half-heartedly. “I do so much for you.” 
“You do,” he replied earnestly, letting go of your hand to wrap his arm around your shoulders as he pressed a kiss to your forehead. “We could lie back down, if you want. Like we were before I so rudely woke you up.” 
“Yeah, I’m super mad about that,” you joked. “Anyway, I was asleep for that, so you’ll have to show me what I was doing.” 
He seemed all too pleased to do so. “Okay, so you were basically like,” he leaned back against the pillows, pulling you down with him, moving his hand to the side of your head to guide you to the place where his shoulder met his chest, “Like that, and then your arm was over here,” he picked up your arm and guided it around his waist. 
“Oh god, that’s so embarrassing,” you said, realizing that he must’ve been awake when you’d done it. 
“Yeah, I know. Really terrible time for me.” 
“I can imagine. I can scoot back over to my side of the bed, just say the word.” 
“Don’t you dare,” he said, squeezing you closer. 
You trailed your fingers up and down his waist, feeling more content than you had in ages. 
“I can’t believe you’d suggest that I would have sex with you right after confessing my feelings. Like, take me to dinner first at least.” 
“Oh my god,” you half-exclaimed, half-laughed. You felt your cheeks heat up again, grateful it was still too dark in the room to be noticeable. “You’re right, I’m so sorry. How’s next Friday?” 
“Hmm, I don’t know. My work schedule is kind of unpredictable. I’ll have to get back to you.” 
“You’re such an ass.” 
A few short hours later, you were back on the jet with the rest of the team. You were lying on the couch while Spencer sat in a seat one row up and across from you, both to avoid suspicion and so you could try to catch up on sleep. He sat facing away from you, but with the angle you were at you could still see one side of his face if you tilted your head up. 
You were just beginning to fade when your phone buzzed next to you. 
Spencer: I have to tell you something, coworker to coworker. 
You looked up to see him blank faced, looking down at the book in his right hand, holding his phone in the left. 
You text back: okay? 
Spencer: My crush asked me out last night. 
You’re exceptionally glad no one was sitting close enough to see you. Spencer had caught you off guard, and you felt an infatuated grin spreading across your face. 
You: what did u say? 
Spencer: Wanted to get your opinion first. 
You: i think u should say yes, obviously. 
Spencer: Idk, I’m kinda nervous. I think she’s trying to jump me on the first date.
You just barely managed to refrain from laughing out loud. You looked up at Spencer again, and he’s looking at his phone as if it contained nothing more than a weather report. You’re astounded. 
You: one could argue that technically you’ve already slept together, so there’s less to be nervous abt
You saw his eyebrows raise just slightly. Success. 
Spencer: You’re trouble, you know that? See you Friday night
You: i promise i won’t try to jump you 
Spencer: Oh
Spencer: I fear I may have shot myself in the foot here
You: i wouldn’t worry about it too much
Spencer: That’s rich coming from you 
You rolled your eyes even though he couldn't see you. 
You: whatever. wear something sexy ;) 
You heard him blow air out of his nose, an almost laugh. 
“Something funny?” you heard Derek ask. 
Shit. 
“This book contains a historical inaccuracy that was proven incorrect eight years before its publishing date,” Spencer replied without missing a beat. 
Unbelievable.
You: you’re unhinged :*
Spencer: Go to sleep already, would you? 
You: coworker to coworker? my crush keeps interrupting my beauty sleep 
Spencer: He’s probably worried about the worldwide implications of you becoming any more beautiful 
You: i guess that’s why the universe gave you insomnia :( too pretty 
Spencer: Stop flirting with me
You: bc you’re too delicate?? 
Spencer: Yes 
You snapped your phone shut, feeling dazed. You watched the clouds go by in the window across from you, and you couldn’t help letting your gaze slide over to Spencer. He’d put his phone down as well, concentrating on his book. Or pretending to concentrate. He was turning the pages much too slowly for his actual pace. 
You: you have got to do a better job of fake reading than that
You heard a page turn. 
You looked up again to see the ghost of a smile threatening the corner of his mouth. 
This was going to be fun. And also, you were so screwed. 
2K notes · View notes
wintfleur · 6 months
Text
ꔫ did so good baby
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°. — pairings ( lando norris x fem! reader )
°. — summary ( you and your boyfriend spend the night together celebrating the Las Vegas gp )
°. — details ( g; smut. w; smut, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it!!!!) dirty talk, sub lando, riding, kinda soft dom reader?, I’m not sure what else to add. wc; 3k )
˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( sooo i decided to write another smut, and ofc I had to do sub lando!!. I’m not too sure of this one, so please let me know what you think! Also think of this as a late birthday post for lando! I can’t believe I forgot to post something on his b-day! I also knew I had to get something out for this gp since Vegas is my home town! HE DESERVED BETTER THIS RACE BUT STILL SO PROUD OF HIM But anyways I hope you guys enjoy this! Please don’t be a silent reader! )
“Look at you baby” you coo as your lips leave a wet trail up his bare stomach and chest. Lando tilts his head back, his eyes shut as heavy breaths pass through his lips. His chest moving simultaneously with his heavy breathing as he tried to calm down from the orgasm you just gave him. A sense of pride warms your chest at the whimper that escapes your boyfriend's pretty lips when you teasingly twirl your tongue around his nipple. “Always so responsive” 
“Darling please” Lando begged, his tone so whiny that it made you smirk. You place your hands on his bare thighs feeling him twitch under you from your touch, you use his thighs to help you sit up on your knees between his spread legs. You look down at your boyfriend who was leaning back on his hands, his eyes still closed. 
You bring one of your hands up to cup his chin with your pointer and thumb, your grip isn't rough, but it also wasn't gentle. “What is it baby, come on look at me.” 
“Please, i need more” Lando pleads after he flutters his eyes open to look up at you. The sight of you nearly took his breath away, you were so enchanting and the way you looked down at him made him even more desperate for more of your touch, for your lips. His eyes wander down your body and he feels his mouth water at the sight of you in his favorite-colored lace lingerie.
“So needy, was what I have given you already not enough?” you dramatically pout, your tone condescending and teasing. Your hand that was gripping his chin moves to his shoulder while your other hand that was resting on his thigh slowly moves up his chest to rest on his other shoulder, using his shoulders as leverage to straddle his lap. A small hiss leaving your boyfriend's lips at the feeling of his throbbing tip brushing against your lace panties when you lean down to whisper in his ear tauntingly to ask again “it wasn't good enough?” 
“No no it was so good…please” Lando stutters over his words, finding it hard to form words at the feeling of you placing soft kisses on his shoulder and collarbone. You so desperately wanted to give him what he wanted, the wet spot on your panties were almost dripping with your desire…but you couldn't give in so quickly.
“Tell me what you want baby” You whispered seductively between the kisses you littered across his neck, his skin burning under the soft but relentless touch of your lips. Lando nearly whimpers at your words, squeezing the sheets in his hands to stop himself from grabbing your hips, his mind running with thoughts of what he wanted. 
“I wanna feel you wrapped around me” Lando whined, cutting himself off with a gasp at the feeling of you sucking under his jaw, hissing when you teasingly blow onto it after. Lando knows that he going to have to beg if you were really going to give him what he wanted “Please, please I've been so good.” 
“Hmm you have” You hummed as you moved your face from his neck to get a look at your boyfriend's pretty face, his eyes were already on you. You can see the pleading look in his eyes, your poor boy was so desperate. You move some of his curls from his forehead and give him a small smile, you couldn't say no to him; not when he looked at you like that. “I’ll give you what you want baby.”  
A breath of relief leaves Lando's lips and you let out a small giggle on the look that appears on his face. You lean back on his thighs, and you keep your eyes on his as you move your hand behind your back, unclipping your bra in one quick movement and dropping it somewhere on the hotel bed. A small smirk appears on your lips at the sight of your boyfriend's eyes immediately dropping to your naked chest, he always did have a weakness for your boobs. Lando licks his lips and has to stop himself from cupping your boobs into his hands. 
You lean back down, a big smile on your lips at the way he looks up at you with his pretty eyes, you would never get over the way he looked at you, you loved him so much. You place your hand on his cheek before closing your eyes and pulling him into a kiss, Lando moaning as your tongues meet. You kissed him until you felt him pull away to catch his breath, he was quick to lean forward to continue the kiss, but you pulled away and shook your head no. You smirked when he whined at your rejection. You whisper sweetly, but an underlying of sternness in your tone “Lay back.” 
Your boyfriend was quick to listen to you, laying back and resting his head on the soft pillow. He was pretty sure he would do anything you said just so he could feel you wrapped around him; he couldn't handle any more of your teasing tonight. It all started when you went out with a few other drivers and their girlfriends to celebrate the race. You had dressed up in his favorite dress and the way you danced against him in the club and the way you rested your hand on his thigh when you sat, got him all worked up. That was 2 hours ago. 
You reached down between the two of you and took him into your hands, a soft moan leaving his lips immediately, at your touch. You could feel him throbbing in your hands, and for a second you felt a little bad for teasing him for so long, but that quickly disappeared as you slowly started to stroke him. The spit and left over cum from the head you gave him, made it easy to move your hand up and down. Lando turns his head to the side, his eyes shutting as moans pass through his parted lips. 
You rub your thumb over his tip, watching his reaction as his breath hitches and a sweet whine leave his lips along with a desperate ‘please’. You decide that that's enough teasing, so you move your hand from his dick and move it between your thighs. A small gasp escaping your lips at the feeling of your fingers brushing against your clit as you move your panties to the side, God you were sopping.  
You hold your panties to the side while your other hand grips onto the base of his dick, teasingly rubbing his tip up and down against your slit, coating his cock in your slick. A whine leaving your boyfriend's lips at the feeling. Once you were content with how wet his cock was, you lined his tip up with your entrance. You look down at your boyfriend and see that he's already looking up at you, and before you can open your mouth to ask; he’s nodding his head yes and whispering “please.” 
You guide his cock into you and slowly sink down, the thick head of his cock stretching your velvety walls, your eyes fluttering close at the stretch. Lando’s thighs clench and a groan leaves his lips at how prettily your lips stretch around his cock. Sweet and loud moans escape your lips as your cunt struggles to take him in, your walls so tight around his thick cock that you can feel every inch. Both of you moaning in unison at the feeling of him being buried to the hilt in your sweet, warm pussy. 
You open your eyes and rest your hands on his abdomen, feeling his chest rise and fall with his heavy breaths, still trying to get used to how tight you feel around him. You smile and lean down, one of your hands coming up to cup his cheek. Lando’s eyes flutter open at the feeling of your naked tits against his chest and before he could let out a moan at the feeling of your fluttering around his dick, you lock his lips in a slow and sensual kiss. 
“You feel so good Lan” you whisper against his lips after you pull away from the kiss. You watch through your eyelashes as a shy smile appears on your boyfriend's lips. You caress his cheek with your thumb for a few seconds before you sit up, adjusting your knees at his side. You place both your hands back on his chest, watching his face as you slowly start to move up and down. 
“God Lando” you whined in pleasure as you continued your motions. Bouncing up and down at a slow pace, the stretch was big but felt so good. Lando’s moans become louder as your rhythm starts to pick up, the feeling of your warm wet walls squeezing him was too much, he didn't know how long he would last. 
“You can touch my baby, it's okay” You coo seductively, you could feel the way he was throbbing in you and the way he was squeezing the sheets, whimpers and pretty moans leaving his parted lips. As soon as those words left your mouth, he quickly stopped squeezing the linen and eagerly moved his hands to your chest, softly groping your tits. You would have teased him because of his eagerness but instead a loud moan came out instead, your nipples were always so sensitive and Lando loved using that to his advantage. 
Lando smiled cheekily at the sound, but you were quick to shut down his own teasing when you purposely clenched around him. Lando drops his hands from your nipples and down to squeeze onto your waist, closing his eyes as a loud groan leaves his lips. You rock your hips faster against his, your nails digging into the skin of his chest as you tilt your head back in pleasure. 
“Darling, I don't know how much longer I’ll last” Lando moans out, his thighs were constantly clenching, he was so close. The way your pussy gripped him and the way he could feel your desire make a mess on his thighs and drip down his balls were too much. Don't get him started on the hypnotic sight of your tits bouncing in unison with your fast pace. And he knew you so well that he could tell you were close too, your movements became more frantic and the way you fluttered around him proved him right. 
“Me to baby — feels so good” you whimpered, you felt that tight rope in your stomach and you knew your peak was close. It was almost overwhelming how good it felt, his pelvic bone was hitting your clit every time you came down, and his pretty moans were too much for you. Lando looks away from your chest and up to your face, and he swore that he could have cummed just at the sight of you. Your mouth was agape, your face twisted in pleasure, your skin was glistening in sweat. 
Lando lifts his legs, his feet planted on the bed and his grip on your hips tighten. Both of you are moaning in unison at the new position. You keep one of your hands on his chest while the other moves behind you to squeeze his knee in pleasure, the new position causing him to go inside you deeper. Lando moves one of his hands from your hips and moves it to his chest, softly squeezing your hand. He needed to hold your hand; he was overwhelmed with the pleasure he was feeling. 
Your eyes flutter open and your movements still, you look down at your boyfriend and see the blissed outlook on his face. He was looking up at you with hooded eyes and his mouth parted as heavy breaths passed through his lips. You could see it in his eyes and the way his hands were clinging to you, he was so close. You smirk and lean down so your chests were almost touching, moving your hand that was now interlocked with his, by the side of his head. 
“What? gonna cum already?” you whispered tauntingly in his ear, tangling your hand that was on his chest, in his hair that was at his nape. You continued to rock your hips against his, your ass slapping against his thighs, creating a lewd sound. A loud and embarrassing whine escaped his red and puffy lips, the coil in his stomach only tightening and so did his grip on your hand and hip. You knew the more you talked to him like that, the faster he would come undone. 
“Gonna fill me up?  — Hmm? Make a mess?” You continued to taunt him, your movements becoming more frantic, chasing his and your release. Lando was to fucked out to properly respond, the only sounds leaving his mouth was moans and a pitiful ‘yes’. You move your hand from his nape and softly pat his bottom lip with your pointer and middle finger. Lando knows what it means, and he eagerly opens his mouth for you. You smile big and bite on your bottom lip, sliding your two fingers into his mouth, his mouth closing around your fingers. 
“So good for me” you coo between your own moans, your eyes not leaving your boyfriend's pretty face. Lando twirled his tongue around your fingers to get them wet, his eyes closed as he couldn't help but moan around them. You pull your wet fingers out of Lando's mouth, smirking at the small whine that leaves his now parted lips. You move your hand between the two of you, your wet fingers making contact with your even wetter clit. Your eyes rolling to the back of your head as you start rubbing it. 
“I’m so close — please can i cum?” Lando begged as he let out a choked-out moan, tilting his head back in pleasure, blinking away the tears that stored in his waterline. You can feel him pant against your mouth, the tip of his nose bumping into yours. The pleasure he was feeling was something he's never felt before, the coil in his stomach becoming too much. Your eyes went down to his and the way he looked, nearly brought you over the edge. 
“Please Lan, i wanna feel you” You almost begged, you were so close. The way your thighs clenched and ached at the fast rhythm you had as you rocked against his cock, and your fingers were sopping and ached at how fast you moved them against your clit; but you cherish the ache. You move to sit up, but a surprised moan leaves your lips as he wraps his arms around your waist, holding you down to his chest, an even louder moan leaves your lips at the feeling of him thrusting up into you. 
“Fuuuck” You whine loudly, your eyes squeezing shut and your fingers moving from your clit to squeeze onto the white linen. The sound of skin slapping was so lewd and echoed across the lavish hotel room, you were thankful that the bed didn't start hitting against the wall from Lando's movements. The angle wrenches a sling of moans leaving yours and his lips, his pace becoming delirious and his grip on you tightens as he cried out “fuck, ‘m gonna cum” 
“Oh my god Lan!” you cried out in pleasure as Lando held you down on his cock. The feeling of his thick head of his cock hitting deep against the sensitive spot of your slick cunt and the feeling of warmth as he spilled himself deep inside you with a loud cry of your name, brings you to your own peak. The tight rope rips and you feel yourself fall into your desire, feeling your walls throb around his cock as you come undone. A pleasure that left you lightheaded. 
It was silent for a long while as you simply held each other, finding comfort in each other's soft touch and the feeling of their beating heartbeat against one another's chest. You moved your hand away from squeezing the linen, a small sting in your fingers from how hard you squeezed, and you moved it up to his cheek. You tilted your head up towards him and watched as his eyes fluttered open at your touch, a tired smile forming on your lips at the beautiful sight of his eyes. You caress his cheek softly with your thumb before whispering “You did so good baby.” 
“Tonight, and at the race, I'm so proud” You continue to whisper, you were insanely proud of your boyfriend. The love and trust that you had for each other made tonight even more special for the two of you. Lando felt a little emotional at your words, no matter what he always knew that you were by his side. 
“I love you” you finally heard his voice; it was quiet and scratchy from all the loud moans that he let out tonight. Your smile gets bigger, and you lean your face closer to his, placing a gentle and slow kiss on his lips. Lando eagerly kissed you back, his hands slowly moving up and down your sides. You pull away to whisper against his lips “I love you more.” 
“Room service?” Lando asked his tone hopeful as he broke the few moments of silence the two of you had shared as you stared into each other's eyes. The two of you didn't have to say anything else, your eyes told each other everything already. You laugh loudly at his words, of course he was thinking about food. Lando smiles big at the sound of your laugh, bringing one of his hands up to softly play with your hair. 
You place a soft kiss on the corner of his lips before you fully sit up, your eyes going down where the two of you meet. You raise your hips and watch as his now soft cock slips out of you, a groan leaving both of your lips at the feeling. A sigh escaping your lips at the feeling of your mixed cum dripping down your thighs. You look up at your boyfriend to see his eyes trained down at your messy cunt softly biting his lip. You scoff playfully and nudge him with your knee, his eyes shooting up to yours with a bashful smile, shy that he got caught. 
“Bath and then room service” 
°. — taglist ( @iloveyou3000morgan @ophcelia )
˖ ་ 💭 roro’s notes ( omg I’m kinda in love with sub!lando and I really want to explore more of it! Feel free to send in some asks! )
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aliennooboo · 1 year
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I was asked to tell more about the holidays in my legacy gameplay, so here is a super long and detailed post on the subject! 😊
How I use holidays in my game
I used to hate the holidays, cos I saw them as something my sims had to participate in and there was always so much pressure to complete all the traditions! But then I cracked it...
Holidays are a great way to add objectives to gameplay! When every day is some kind of a holiday with its own theme, there's always something for my sims to do.
I tick the "day off" box only if the holiday is a major one or the traditions would feel too rushed if my sim worked on the same day.
I try to have a lot of outdoor/traveling holidays in the spring and summer, and more home lot based holidays in the autumn and winter.
For some holidays, I add a diverse set of traditions and then choose only one or two to complete every sim year.
Sometimes my sims are just too busy with other things in life to participate at all. The No more "awful holiday" sad moodlet mod (linked below) is super useful because it completely takes the pressure off of completing holiday traditions!
It's very refreshing to use custom icons for the holidays, it matters more than you'd think! I use the More selectable icons mod (linked below) for this feature.
I've taken ideas and inspiration for some of my holidays from countless lists made by other simmers over the years.
Holiday mods
Traditions
Please note that some of these mods feature some of the same traditions - pick and choose so you don't get duplicates! Every custom tradition I use in my game is from these mods.
Icemunmun's traditions
LittleMsSam's traditions
Kiara's traditions
Renegadesims's traditions
Lychee's traditions
Pet traditions
Toddler traditions
Kids traditions
Occult traditions
Crafting traditions
Relaxation traditions
Eco-friendly traditions
Food traditions
Baking traditions
Writing traditions
A Night Out traditions
Cottage Living traditions
More Cottage Living traditions
Island Living traditions
Snowy Escape traditions
More Snowy Escape traditions
Paranormal traditions
University traditions
Realm of Magic, Paranormal & Vampires traditions
Other
More selectable icons
No more "awful holiday" sad moodlet
Holiday traditions in my game
The number next to each tradition shows which mod it's from. If there is no number, it's an EA tradition.
Spring
🌅 New Year's Day (day off) A chill day for spending time with your family after New Year's celebrations.
Family dinner ³
Cleaning
Cook pancakes ³
Play cards ³
Tell stories
🌟 Resolution Day It's time to make those New Year's resolutions reality! At least on this one day of the year...
Fasting
Exercise
Donate ³
Volunteer ³
Find penpal ¹⁵
🔫 Play Day Play is the work of the child. Child sims should invite their friends over for some play time!
Activity table ⁸
Make an experience ⁸
Monkey bars ⁸
Play pirate ⁸
Space explorer ⁸
🌄 Explorer's Day (day off) Once per season, sims have a day off for exploring the world! Maybe this year you could go on a mini vacation to Granite Falls to experience it in every season? Whatever you decide to do, this is a day for adventure!
Go hiking ³
Go for a walk ⁶
Go on a vacation or travel
Go sailing ³
Go camping ³
🌍 Earth Day You take care of nature and nature takes care of you.
Apply eco upgrades ¹²
Give gift to wild animal ¹⁷
Island clean up ¹²
Socialize with wild birds ¹⁷
Go hiking ³
🥪 Picnic Day Pack some tasty snacks and go on a picnic with your friends.
Go picnic ¹⁸
Invite guests
Play horseshoes ³
Collect bugs ³
Fire
💝 Love Day (day off) Take your significant other on a date and show them how much you love them! Or stay in and watch a romantic movie... with a special someone or alone, either way is fine!
Romantic spirit
Go on a date
Out for coffee ¹⁶
Send love letter ¹⁵
Watch romantic TV
🌮 Dining Day Today's all about eating as many different meals as you can. Taste something new or stick to old favorites!
Eat cultural dishes ³
Eat grilled cheese ³
Eat pizza ³
Hot pot ¹³
Order food ¹³
🧨 Gnome Day It's gnomes. Just gnomes. We can survive this. It's only once a year. We just have to keep them happy. It should be easy, right?
Holiday gnomes
🧽 Spring Cleaning Spring gives you a boost of energy. It's time to clean the house and fix anything that needs fixing!
Cleaning
Do laundry ³
Upgrade animal shelter ¹⁷
Upgrade chicken coop ¹⁷
Water crops ¹⁷
🪩 Party Night No self-respecting sim stays home on this wild night! It's time to partaaaaaay!
Out for coffee ¹⁶
Drinks at the bar ¹⁶
Go bowling ³
Bubble blower ³
Party spirit
🛠️ DIY Day It can't be that hard, the tutorial made it look pretty easy... Famous last words.
Build-a-bot ¹⁰
Crafting ¹⁰
Fabrication ¹⁰
Juice fizzing ¹⁰
Woodwork ¹⁰
🐇 Bunny Day (day off) Children's favorite holiday that's all about bunnies!
Egg hunt
Socialize with rabbit ¹⁷
Baking
Flower Bunny
Give gift to wild animal ¹⁷
🌺 Festival of Flowers A celebration of the spring turning to summer.
Flower arranging ¹⁰
Give flowers
Visit flower stall ¹⁷
Sunbathe ³
Gardening
Summer
☀️ Start of Summer It's finally summer and you can do all those fun things you dreamed of in the dark of winter!
Streaking
Go fishing ³
Go swimming ³
Kiddie pool ⁷
Play basketball ²
🐶 Pet Day Show your pet how much you love them on this special day!
Feeling the love ⁶
Pamper pets ⁶
Play with dog ⁶
Play with laser pointer ⁶
Teach tricks ⁶
🌄 Explorer's Day (day off) Once per season, sims have a day off for exploring the world! Maybe this year you could go on a mini vacation to Granite Falls to experience it in every season? Whatever you decide to do, this is a day for adventure!
Go hiking ³
Go for a walk ⁶
Go on a vacation or travel
Go sailing ³
Go camping ³
🧸 Children's Day Spend time with your children today. Take them to the park or the beach, or play with them at home.
Voidcritters ¹
Build sand sculpture ³
Games
Puppet show ³
Space explorer ⁸
🐄 Farm Day Visit a farm in Henford-on-Bagley and get to know the cows, chickens and llamas!
Harvest animal produce ¹⁷
Harvest crops ¹⁷
Take care of farm animals ¹⁸
Make animal treats ¹⁷
Socialize with villagers ¹⁷
🌞 Summer Vacation (3 days off) Enjoy summer to the max with 3 days of vacation!
Go on a vacation or travel
Go swimming ³
Invite guests
Sunbathe ³
Water fun
🍼 Toddler Day Take your toddler to the park or arrange a toddler play date.
Ball pit ⁷
Kiddie pool ⁷
Slide ⁷
Tiny treehouse ⁷
Jungle gym ⁷
🎵 Music Day Enjoy music in all its forms. Sing, play, listen.
Dancing ²
Music ³
Party spirit
Watch live performance ³
🌻 Garden Day Does anything make one happier than a thriving garden? Shower your plants with love (and water) today, make a new garden plan, or sow new seeds.
Sow seeds ¹⁷
Fertilize crops ¹⁷
Gardening
Collect bugs ³
Plant oversized crop ¹⁸
👩‍👩‍👦 Family Day Sometimes life feels so busy that you barely see even your own family. Make sure to spend some quality time with your loved ones today.
Baking
Family dinner ³
Games
Puppet show ³
Water fun
🏝️ Beach Day (day off) Celebrate summer in Sulani!
Build sand sculpture ³
Interact with dolphin ¹⁹
Go snorkeling ¹⁹
Go sailing ³
Collect seashells ⁵
🍃 End of Summer One last chance to enjoy a warm summer evening... Have a barbeque with your family and friends!
Bar-B-que
Sunbathe ³
Hot tub ³
Eat ice cream ³
Juice keg ²³
Autumn
🔥 Bonfire Night Dark autumn evenings are perfect for a little gathering around a bonfire. Look at the stars, roast some marshmallows, and wrap yourself in a blanket when it starts to get cold.
Fire
Stargaze ³
Fireworks
Tell stories
Fire dance ⁵
🧛 Occult Night They're creepy and they're kooky... mysterious and spooky... They're the occults and this is their night!
Alien powers ⁹
Mermaid powers ⁹
Use vampire powers ⁹
Cast spells ⁹
Use cauldron ⁹
🎲 Game Night Play some games with your family or friends to bring a bit of fun into this dark season.
Games
Go bowling ³
Play cards ³
Play darts ²
Play foosball ²
🌄 Explorer's Day (day off) Once per season, sims have a day off for exploring the world! Maybe this year you could go on a mini vacation to Granite Falls to experience it in every season? Whatever you decide to do, this is a day for adventure!
Go hiking ³
Go for a walk ⁶
Go on a vacation or travel
Go sailing ³
Go camping ³
❓ Life Change Day Do something today that has the potential to change the rest of your life!
Meet or adopt ⁶
Go on a date
Write a book ¹⁵
Go on a vacation or travel
Run errands for villagers ¹⁷
💡 Skill Day Learn something new today! Either work on skills you already know, or try doing something outside of your comfort zone.
Art & music spirit
Woodwork ¹⁰
Juice fizzing ¹⁰
Candle making ¹⁰
Craft wool items ¹⁷
🛋️ Couch Potato Day After the toil of yesterday, take it easy in good conscience today. It's not a day off, but you could always call in sick... Cough, cough.
Watch a movie ³
Sports TV
Sauna ¹¹
Read a book ³
Relaxing soak ¹¹
🍂 Autumn Day Enjoy the crisp air, the sunshine on the colorful leaves, and cosy autumn activities!
Fall fun ⁴
Fire
Canning ¹⁸
Drink tea ³
Candle making ¹⁰
🧓🏽 Parent's Day If you're in good terms with your parent(s), today's the perfect day to remind them how much you love and appreciate them.
Family dinner ³
Gift a parent ³
Hug parent ³
Remembrance
Tell stories
⚽ Sports Day Whether you like pumping iron or shooting hoops, do some exercise today.
Exercise
Go rock wall climbing ¹
Play basketball ²
Play soccer ³
💋 Date Night Whether it's your significant other or someone you don't even know yet, ask them on a date tonight!
Go on a date
Woohoo ³
Romantic spirit
🕯️ Other Side Day The veil is thinning... If you have business with someone in the afterlife, today's the day to get in touch.
Summon Bonehilda ⁹
Summon a ghost ²²
Conduct a seance ⁹
Commune with the departed ²²
Remembrance
🌽 Harvestfest (day off) Give thanks for everything the land has given you this year. Treat your garden, treat your animals, treat yourself.
Invite guests
Grand meal
Thankful spirit
Make animal treats ¹⁷
Harvest crops ¹⁷
🎃 Spooky Day (day off) It's time to get spooky!
Carve pumpkin ³
Spooky spirit
Trick or treat
Wear costumes
Use cauldron ⁹
Winter
🥧 Baking Day Get your baking supplies out, because today's all about the magic of flour and sugar! Have pancakes and coffee for breakfast, and bake all your favorite pastries.
Baking
Cook pancakes ³
Drink coffee ³
Decorate cookies ¹⁴
Make cupcakes ¹⁴
🌄 Explorer's Day (day off) Once per season, sims have a day off for exploring the world! Maybe this year you could go on a mini vacation to Granite Falls to experience it in every season? Whatever you decide to do, this is a day for adventure!
Go hiking ³
Go for a walk ⁶
Go on a vacation or travel
Go sailing ³
Go camping ³
📚 Written Word Day Read your favorite book in your favorite armchair, or go the library to find something new to read. Write a letter to someone, or finally start writing that book you always dreamt of.
Find penpal ¹⁵
My private journal ¹⁵
Writing skill ¹⁵
Read a book ³
Send love letter ¹⁵
💥 Chaos Day It seems like everyone's lost their social filter today! It's chaos all around! I hate all my friends! OOPS, did I say that out loud...
Air grievances
Fighting
Mischief spirit
Streaking
Magic duel ⁹
🎁 Do Good Day Today is all about being good to others. Make the world a better place by helping those around you.
Donate ³
Make pet food ⁶
Run errands for villagers ¹⁷
Volunteer ³
Vote for policies ¹²
🤝 BFF Day Invite your best friend over for a nice cup of tea or coffee. Share secrets, cry and laugh, have some fun.
Invite guests
Drink coffee ³
Drink tea ³
Play cards ³
Out for coffee ¹⁶
🧘 Mindfulness Day Take care of your mind and body.
Meditate ¹¹
Sauna ¹¹
Massage ³
My private journal ¹⁵
Do yoga ¹¹
🏔️ Snow Day (day off) Celebrate winter in Mt. Komorebi!
Go rock climbing ²⁰
Go skiing ²⁰
Go sledding ²⁰
Go snowboarding ²⁰
Hot springs ¹¹
🏡 Homebody Day (day off) Have you ever dreamed of just staying at home when it's dark and cold outside? Well, today you can!
Canning ¹⁸
Knitting ¹⁰
Cross-stitching ¹⁸
Practice herbalism ¹
Make pet food ⁶
🎄 Winterfest Eve Put up decorations for this wintery holiday, cook a delicious dinner, and then enjoy the evening as you wait for Father Winter's visit.
Attend holiday ceremony
Decorate
Festive spirit
Father Winter
Grand meal
☃️ Winterfest Day (day off) It's the most peaceful day of the year. Spend it with your loved ones.
Invite guests
Family dinner ³
Baking
Go skating ³
Open presents
🎨 Creativity Day Get your easel down from the attic, find your old camera in the garage, or pick up the knitting needles that have been collecting dust on the shelf. Let's do some arts and crafts!
Art & music spirit
Activity table ⁸
Cross-stitching ¹⁸
Writing skill ¹⁵
Knitting ¹⁰
❄️ Yamachan Day Travel to Mt. Komorebi to meet Yamachan!
Yamachan ²¹
Make a Tanabata wish ²¹
Hot pot ¹³
Order from Mt. Komorebi festival food stalls ²¹
Go hiking ³
🥂 New Year's Eve It's time to celebrate the year gone by, and welcome the new one that's right around the corner.
Countdown to midnight
Drinking
Eat pizza ³
Fireworks
Make resolutions
More holiday ideas
If you want to create your own holidays, but struggle with coming up with ideas, here are some things I always consider when I create holidays.
Can you match a world with a season? Summer holidays in Sulani, winter holidays in Mt. Komorebi, etc.
Alternatively, have a summer holiday in Sulani when it's winter elsewhere, a winter holiday in Mt. Komorebi when it's summer elsewhere, etc.
What if you took the default holidays and placed them in a different season? Celebrate Winterfest on the beach in the summer!
Can you match a world with a theme? Nature holidays in Granite Falls, city holidays in San Myshuno, etc.
Think of a simple theme for your holiday (games, sports, food, animals, books, etc.) and choose traditions based on that.
Create a holiday that requires your sim to travel from world to world to complete all the traditions.
Have a 3 day holiday for a vacation trip, with different traditions to complete each day.
Create holidays for specific life stages. What would a teen or an elder sim do for their holiday?
Create a holiday for each occult type. How would a Spellcaster spend their holiday?
Can you think of a way to combine holidays and clubs?
Put two really different holidays right next to each other so you have lots of variety in gameplay.
If you're playing a legacy, create a holiday for each heir sim based on their personality, and have their offspring celebrate these holidays to honor them.
Research real life holidays that are celebrated around the world to find new ideas.
Can't find the traditions that you need in your game? Follow this tutorial by LittleMsSam to create your own traditions!
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ellie with a mean gf!
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(prjoecting like a mf rn...)
a/n - i have been very unmotivated to write full-fleshed stuff so i'm deciding to write drabbles/headcannons for now. also THANK YOU FOR ALL THE ATTENTION ON CH.1 OF GOOD LUCK, BABE! it makes my heart smile that you guys love it so much... also😭😭...: @sweetcici11 srry that i lied and said ur fic would be out a few nights ago. i'm really trying to finish it but i don't want to rush it and it be shitty. i really want it to be enjoyable and as good as it can be. but i PROMISE you it WILL be posted... sooner or later! i also have a few more drafts to finish too, so, i hope you guys like them when they come out!!!!!
content warnings - fluff, i'm a bitch and i want to feel loved and think that someone can put up with my cuntiness😝😝 , over-usage of commas probably, i think they're low-key kind of toxic?!?!?!?! , guys i promise i'm not this bad i've just been pretty insufferable these last few days and need an outlet 😭😭 .
i wrote way more than i thought i was going to...
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- you both hated each other at first. ...well actually, you hated her, and she was like, "😞😞" and then got used to it after a while and started being mean back 2 u!!
- dina introduced ellie to you when you both were hanging out with her. "you guys are going to love each other🥰!" ... you didn't 🤗 !
- ellie said hi to you and all you did was look her up and down, stare at her for a few seconds and then turn your head.
- everytime ellie would (attempt to) strike up a conversation you would give an overtly enthusiastic response or just stare at her like she had two heads or just blatantly ignore her. dina is over there like, '😟😟 . can we not have one good day...' when dina would leave for short periods of time and ellie was sure that you didn't like her, she would just talk about anything to get your blood boiling, our girl lllloooovvveessss to push buttons, we know this to be true.
- it got worse yet more tolerable after that. whenever she'd see you at gatherings or parties, you'd do your damnest to stay away from/avoid her. and she'd do her damnest to get you as upset with her as possible. it always ended with not-so-playful not-so-friendly banter!
- you were talking with jesse about something on the couch, and ellie came over and DELIBERATELY, DELIBERATELY... interrupted you 🤗 ! :
you shoot daggers at her face with your eyes, your jaw set hard and your eyes narrowed.
ellie tried to feign innocence, raising a brow at you after she looked over to see your facial expressions long after she felt them.. "what are you looking at me like that for🤨🤨?" , "i was fucking talking, you're being rude." , "if i have to get used to you being a bitch, you got to do the same." , you just huffed at her response and crossed your arms before walking off a few minutes after, realizing that the conversation you were having with jesse earlier was indeed over. ellie smirked to herself, victory was her's!
- she started calling you the nickname brat out of the blue... it blindsided tf out of you. here's the origin story!:
you look at ellie with a disgusted look on your face as she exhales smoke. her glazed over eyes meet yours before she offers the joint to you, out of genuine kindness. "want a hit?" she asked, forgetting how much of a bitch you were for, like, 0.2 seconds. you glare at her for a moment longer before plastering a sarcastic smile on your face, snatching the joint from her fingertips and dropping it onto the floor. you kept her eyes on yours as you stomped and smushed it into the ground.
now she remembered.
she stood up instantaneously, she was pissed. "what the fuck?!" she shouted, earning a few looks from some friends across the room. they strained their necks for a little bit before they saw you, it made sense now, and then turned back to the conversation.
you close your eyes for a slight second as a satisfied smile graced the corners of your lips. "you know i don't smoke, ellie." you responded with in a condescendingly sweet voice.
she didn't even argue with you. "you're such a fuckin' brat." she muttered under her breath before walking away. you had to try your very best to ignore the heartbeat in your pussy. (🤗!)
- she didn't get to see how much effect that title had on you that night, but she noticed afterwards.
- one time you didn't say anything to ellie during a hangout, distracted by someone you disliked more than her. ellie kind of missed it☹️☹️ .
you were brought out of your thoughts when you felt her cold hand touch your shoulder. when you noticed it was her who was doing it, you pulled back with a furrow of her brows. ellie smiled. there she was.
"you haven't said one mean thing to me since i've gotten here. are you dying?"
you scoffed as you pointed in the direction your anger was radiating from. it was a girl ellie saw here and there in jackson, sometimes she was paired with her during patrols, she wasn't crazy about her but she paid no mind to her existence.
"what?- what does this have to do with me-"
"what it has to do with you, is that you should feel honored that i can tolerate you... can't fuckin' stand that bitch."
ellie scoffed before speaking up once more, "oh, c'mon you're being dramatic. don't be a brat."
your eyes went wide for a second and as you turned away, she could see the cheek that was facing her turn an embarrassing shade of red. she found your weakness.
- when you guys started dating, no one, and i mean NO ONE, believed it. (i don't feel like writing how u two got together maybe if y'all like this enough i'll make a full-fleshed oneshot abt it😭.)
- joel saw you guys together... like, not arguing, and HER head on YOUR shoulder... he thought he got laced with acid for a quick second there... jesse felt like he missed a couple chapters and felt very sad that he hadn't caught onto it quicker... and dina was so proud of herself, "told you, you guys would love each other 😁." she's so smug, I LOVE HER!
- she constantly has to reprimand you like you're a child when you guys are around someone you obviously don't like for whatever reason. once whoever left the room, ellie'll pinch your shoulder or your thigh, whatever skin is on display at the moment, not too hard, just to get you to wince a bit. you'll make a face at her afterwards. "ow, what the fuck was that for ellie?" , "we can talk shit when we get home, don't make a scene🙄." you stress her out sometimes...
- just bcs you guys are together DOES NOT mean your attitude has gone away.
whenever ellie and you have gotten in an argument, you're always being extra sarcastic and EXTRA BITCHY just to get on her nerves.
"baby, have you seen my gun?" she asks you, breaking the silence voluntarily as she's two minutes from being late to patrol.
you don't look up to her, you keep on looking at the pages of an old magazine. "idk ellie, did you check to see if it was shoved up your ass."
she just stands there for a second like this 🧍‍♀️ , before sighing and walking somewhere else to find it. "i'll fuckin' deal with you later." she mutters under her breath, obviously annoyed. you smirk to yourself as you flip another page.
- she does love, however, that you've gotten gentler with her since the relationship blossomed between you two. very few people (dina and ellie... sometimes jesse.) can get you to stop, and ellie is proud of herself that she could add beast-tamer to the top of her list of many skills and talents.
- sometimes she has to calm you down, sometimes all it takes is a stare in your direction. ... well, it's oftentimes a glare... you're your own woman/person and a relationship will not restrict you from showing off your talents!!!!!
- ellie has to constantly keep you from getting into arguments that could harm you physically. although your craft of bitchery is amazing, you can't fight to save your life.
she'll be pulling you back like an angry barking dog on a leash.
"i could've fucking took h-" , "you overestimate yourself a lot, baby."
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creatureheart · 1 month
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I've made a few posts talking about things in the nonhuman and alterhuman communities recently, mostly just brief looks into them, so I thought I would share this one.
The info may not be all that much, and could easily be expanded upon, but I did my best for a simple bit of info for certain things.
All pictures have ALT text included, but I shall post the text also here, under a cut, cause it's a bit long, lol
Nonhuman as an identity: To identify as not human either fully or partially. (hate/trolls will be reported and deleted)
Reminder: These are all personal identities and why someone identifies as nonhuman and what term someone decides to use for themself is exclusively their business. In the end it is what makes the most sense to the individual and not up to others. Now, onto some of the communities that are included under the nonhuman identity:
Otherkin: from the term "otherkind" - an identity which typically encompasses being wholly or partially a nonhuman entity. Usually understood to cover those who identify as mythical creatures and other fantastical things. Also covers those that fall outside of beings and creatures.
Examples of non-being or creature based identities: Conceptkin: an identity where one identifies as a concept such as the concept of night or fire. Objectkin: and identity where one identifies as an object. Songkin: an identity where one identifies as a song.
Examples of being and creature based identities: Therianthropy: usually shortened to therian - where one identifies AS a nonhuman animal. Some will say that this term refers to only earthen animals, living or extinct, but it has never only encompassed earthly animals. The community's language came from those who identify as werecreatures. Theriomythic: an alternate identity term for one who identifies in some intrinsic was as a mythical creature. Paleotherian: an identity term for one who identifies as a now extinct earthly animal, like a dinosaur or mammoth.
Cladotherian or Cladokin: an identity term for one who does not identify as a distinct species, but a broader identity encompassing an entire genus or larger grouping. Cladomythic: an identity term for one who identifies as a group (clade) of animalistic mythical creatures.
Fictionkin: an identity term that covers all things fictional. For those who identify as something fictional like characters, animals, species, objects, etc. These can be from books, shows, video games, etc, but not always! Original fictional characters and such are also possible.
There are many other identities that fall under the nonhuman umbrella which is why it's important to do your own research to figure out if a certain term works for you. All these identities share the trait of being involuntary. You cannot choose to be therian, otherkin, or the other mentioned identities.
While the already mentioned identities are involuntary, there are some identities that fall under being voluntary. Otherlink: an identity where one voluntarily identifies as nonhuman. Copinglink: an identity where one voluntarily identifies as nonhuman to copes with things such as trauma, stress, etc.
A lot of people may also say that it is impossible to become a therian, otherkin, etc. While the identity is involuntary, things like trauma and neurodivergence can cause an individual to take on a nonhuman identity when they had not had one previously.
Most will usually see people explain that these identities are spiritual or psychological, but these are only some of the ways that individuals may experience them. Some other experiences of nonhumanity: Symbolic Metaphorical Ancestral Physical (Yes this is an actual reason for some and they are just as much a part of the community as anyone else. Physical and Ancestral nonhumans are part of the community's history and some of its founders.)
For those looking for more information, and community places, here are some places to check out! Werelist Nonhuman National Park Alterhuman Archive The Chimera's Library. The above are forums and archives of information on the community. Most archived information is thanks to who-is-page, liongoatsnake and frameacloud on tumblr.
While this is a brief look into the nonhuman identity that I could share, I do hope it has been helpful in some way. Remember to be true to yourself, and don't let anyone tell you how to feel. Ignore, report, delete and block the haters!
Yeen out~
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youngtacoes · 11 days
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Strangers, no more
Cooper Howard aka The Ghoul x f!reader
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Author's note: this is a long one !! i've had this scenario in my head for a long ass time and i just had to get it out on paper. cooper isn't as cruel in this one, sorry if that's not your thing, but he can be soft sometimes too! fyi: reader is 18+ and everything is consensual! If you're only here for the smut you can skip toward the end.
Word count: 6,8k
Summary: Cooper is a bounty hunter struggling for caps and you need to be transported safely across the wasteland in "good condition", luckily it pays well. What could possibly go wrong?
Warnings: 18+ Mentions of r*pe, impregnation & torture, religious cult, angst, virgin!reader, losing virginity, graphic smut
~
It was getting bad, really damn bad. Days of good-for-nothing bounty jobs, vial after vial, cough attack after cough attack. He needed the caps desperately if he was to keep himself from turning feral anytime soon. He’d been taking small jobs here and there, just enough to keep himself at bay for a few days, but he knew he couldn’t keep going at this rate for much longer. He needed a bigger job, a bigger cash prize, a bigger bounty, but every time he stopped by the wall of people with prizes attached to them, he found himself disappointed in how low the numbers were. That is until he notices a fresh face staring back at him, hidden behind newer posters, large letters displayed across. "BIG JOB", and this one has an even larger number attached.
He steps forward, pushing the other posts away and rips the new face off the wall to study the number closer. Yup, he read it right.
Five thousand caps.
"Well, I’ll be damned," he muttered.
A young girl, maybe in her 20s. She looks well put together, innocent, and has a sincere smile on her face. For the first time in a very, very long time, he found himself wondering what her story was and why she was worth so damn much, but he didn’t like to dwell on it for too long. A job is a job, and this was going to be worth every damn cap.
On the poster, it states that she was to get picked up at the coordinates provided and to keep her in "good condition". Well, shit, that might just be the hardest part. The ghoul had never been one to take care of his captives, and most often he preferred if the poster stated "good dead or alive". This was definitely going to be different, and if it wasn’t for the "good condition" detail, he’d almost think it was too good to be true. Perhaps even think it was a trap.
~
It’s midnight, and you’re seated by your desk with a pen in hand, drawing carefully and concentrated on making art on this dirty sheet of old newspaper, but it was good enough for you. You drew flowers and insects from an old pre-war book about nature and their hidden treasures. You were always fascinated by the pre-war times, and though you will never know what it was truly like, you liked to imagine who you would’ve been back in those times.
It’s your way of forgetting about the current state of your life and the predicament you found yourself in. You were born in the wasteland, to a mother who did her best to protect you, but in the end, she had been brutally murdered by a group of raiders who attacked your farm, and you were taken captive by them at the age of 9. You spent a few horrid days with them before your current group found you and bought your freedom from them.
To be fair, you’ve been treated quite well by this group, and you thought you had a family in them at one point. That was until a few months ago when they decided you needed to be isolated from the rest for reasons you still didn’t quite understand. The leader of the group, Margot, had carefully selected you for a special assignment, and made sure to tell you the isolation was for your own good. Apparently you needed special treatment before a long journey to a sacred place called Halfway that was waiting for your arrival.
Your fellow peers would come and visit you to show their excitement, though you didn’t quite understand it, it must be something good with all the positive buzz that’s surrounding you. So your head got filled with all sorts of scenarios and dreams of where you were going and what luxuries you were to experience on this assignment. Though you had your doubts that it was all just a coverup for something else, you didn’t have any reason not to trust your group. They had been nothing but kind to you as long as you’d been there.
You’re startled out of your thoughts by heavy knocks on your locked door and a command shouted from behind.
"Lights out!"
You sigh at the command. "Yes madam!"
You don't bother packing up your drawing supplies, you'll be continuing with it tomorrow anyway, and the day after, probably. You find your bed and blow out the nearby candles.
Every night you can't help but wonder when your assignment and journey would begin. You had all sorts of feelings and questions about it, but every time you tried talking to Margot, she would give you answers that didn’t really answer anything at all, so you gave up on trying to figure it out a long time ago.
~
The next morning you’re awaken rudely by the guards coming into your room and practically dragging you out of bed in your dazed state.
"Wha- HEY-" you try to muster what’s going on, but before even getting a word out, you’re on your feet and Margot stands before you with her hands on her back.
"Morning lucky one. It’s time, the day we have waited long for is finally here," She's so serious in her delivery, it almost frightens you.
It’s happening.
"We’ve hired someone to transport you safely across the wasteland for your assigment, they’re here and won’t be kept waiting. Get ready in 5 and say your goodbyes, quickly."
Suddenly it feels like it’s all happening too fast, and a slight panic rise inside you. Margot must've notices your panicked stare, cause her features soften, and she steps closer to you.
"You’ve come so far, and I’m so proud of you,» She smiles at you with encouragement, "This is your moment, and I know you will succeed and make us all proud."
Her words give you enough to calm down before the panic escalated. And you give her a nod that you indeed got this. You can do this. You’ve done hard things before, this shouldn’t be any different.
"Yes madam," you say smiling back at her. She flashes you one last smile and a wink before turning and walking back out.
Outside you find everyone from your group waiting in the corridors. They smile at you, some coming to greet you, give you kisses on the cheek as you’re led out of the main building by the guards. It’s all a bit much, but this must be pretty big deal. Margot waits for you by the gate to your commune, but she's not alone. A dark figure stands just outside, looking impatient.
You’re filled with scepticism as you walk up them, but you have to put your trust in her. She notices you and takes a hold of your hands with a smile.
"You will do great," And the wave of panic that had a hold of you before, washes off of you completely. You nod confidently now, and you start believing that this is actually gonna be totally fine.
You feel the dark figure moving closer to you, his hat covering his face just enough to keep him anonymous for the time being. He still looks terrifying, but you have to trust this man is here only to protect you on your journey to Halfway, and that he will do his best to do so.
Margot shoots the man one last look, "Good condition," the man still doesn’t show his face, but he nods.
"Yes ma’am. Let’s go princess," You realize he’s talking to you, and you’re startled by the nickname at first, but you decide not to fuzz, at least not yet. He’s already started walking away, so you find yourself running up behind him, waving back to your leader for the last time, only she doesn’t wave back, she doesn’t even flash a smile. She stares back at you with a stern look as the gates to the commune come to a close.
It doesn’t give you the best feeling, but perhaps she was feelings sad you were leaving and didn’t want to show any emotions. Either way, you try to push the sight out of your mind, doing your best to follow the stranger. He doesn’t say a word for a long time, and you find that maybe it’s best we keep to ourselves for the time being, but as an hour or so go by, you find yourself a little curious.
You clear your throat, "Excuse me, sir?"
He doesn’t reply, but shoots a quick look over his shoulder to indicate that he’s listening.
"How long do you think we’ll be walking for?"
Given that Margot had given you absolutely no information about this journey, you figured it was worth a shot to ask your new strange companion.
"Couple’a days, if we don’t get sidetracked," His voice ragged, western, serious.
"Oh," not really sure if you dared asking for further details. You’d prefer to keep it peaceful for as long as possible, but you find the courage to ask anyway.
"Sidetracked by what?"
You hear him sigh, "Unnecessary bullshit."
‘Whatever that means’ you think to yourself. He doesn’t seem like the talkative type, but after months of isolation you find yourself rather desperate for someone to talk to, and if you are to spend days with this man, you figure it’s worth a shot trying to get to know him for whatever time you have to spend together.
"I see.. I’ll be on the lookout for that I suppose."
You can barely believe your ears when you hear a chuckle coming from the stranger in front of you.
After that positive feedback, you find yourself braver.
"I didn’t catch your name?"
His posture changes after the question left your mouth.
"I didn’t give to ya,"
"Well, I’m Y/N, but everyone calls me Lucky. It’s a bit of a recent nickname though. You see, I just spend 6 months in completely isolation-"
You get cut off abruptly when you find yourself crashing into the strangers back, realizing he's come to an complete halt. He turns around, his figure towering slightly over you. His hat is no longer doing it’s job to cover his face, and utter horror washes over you as it's fully visable in the golden hour light.
"Listen sweetheart, I’m here to do this goddamn job. I don’t wanna hear your whole life story, and you sure as hell won’t be hearing mine. How about we keep our histories to ourselves and try to get this over with as quickly as fucking possible. That sound good to you?"
Your eyes aren’t able to leave his face. His sunken eyes, skin looking like it's been melted by the sun, an obvious nose missing. A ghoul, a ghoul is transporting you. You’ve not met a ghoul before, and those you’ve heard stories of have been grotesque. Fair enough they had been feral, but who’s to say this one won’t turn?
You get the gist of what he’s saying, and simply nod in agreement, not wanting to make this trip any more uncomfortable than it already is.
His eyes bore into your own, and he’s a lot closer than you’d prefer. For a second you think his eyes dart down to your lips before he turns around to keep walking, but that would be crazy, and very disturbing.
~
Nightfall comes fast, and you’re finding yourself worried for where you’ll be sleeping for the night. You really don’t wanna ask the ghoul, but your steps are getting shorter and slower, and you think the Ghoul have noticed cause he starts walking off track and leads you to a broken down abandoned house off the road.
"Stay here," he says before entering the house, gun up, ready to shoot. You do as he says and wait patiently for him to clear the coast. It doesn’t take long before you hear squealing and two shots being fired. You’re not sure whether to go in or run, but it doesn't matter anyway cause you freeze up completely in these situations. All you can do is hope that the ghoul knows what he's doing.
He comes back to the door a few minutes later, gesturing for you to come in, you’re hesitant, but you do. It's not like you have much of a choice anyway, "What was the shooting about?"
In his left hand he holds a dead radroach, and you find yourself wondering why he’s holding it. That's so fucking gross.
"You should be grateful. I got us some lunch the road," he says, flashing you a smirk. It's almost like he knew you’d be repulsed by it.
"Uhm, y’know what? I think I’m good, for the time being." You try to be nice, but you feel like you might not have a say in the matter. This might be the only food you get for a while.
"Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll make a fire and we’ll put it on the grill."
You want to roll your eyes and complain, but you force yourself to give him a smile and if anything, show some appreciation. He did in fact just catch you a meal.
You’re able to swallow some of the grilled radroach, but after the fresh foods you had grown accustomed to from your commune, you found this hard to stomach.
Nightfall has fallen completely now, and you’ve done your best to make a comfortable sleeping spot by the fire. The ghoul sits nearby keeping watch, and you find yourself very curious of his past and who he is, or who he used to be. Thinking back to his speech earlier about keeping your histories to yourselves reminds you not to ask, but he didn’t say anyting about asking about where you were going.
"What do you know about Halfway?" You watch him closely for any hints he migth give away, "Is it as grand as everyone makes it out to be?" You lay on your side, arm resting under your head.
He doesn’t look at you, eyes fixated on the fire. "How about you get some rest, alright?" he avoids your question. How annoying.
You turn to lay on your back with a puff of annoyance. «Nobody wants to tell me anything,"
"Maybe there's a reason for that."
You turn to look at him, his eyes still not meeting yours. "What is that supposed to mean?" By the sound of it, nothing good.
"Look it's not my job to inform you of shit, and if your leader wanted you to know, trust me darling, she would've told ya."
His eyes flicker up to look directly at yours this time, and it catches you off guard. Not knowing what else to say, you decide to turn to your side, away from him. This whole thing is giving you a really bad feeling.
You’re back on track the next day. Your legs sore from the day before. Having been in isolation for 6 months will do that to you, you guessed, but you'll manage.
The ghoul hasn't said a word yet today, and though you didn't exactly get the answers you were looking for last night, you refused to give up completely.
"What did Margot mean when she said good condition?"
He doesn’t answer, of course he doesn’t. You sigh,
"Look, I don’t mean to be annoying. Truly, I’d just like to know what is waiting for me. That’s all, and I really don't see the harm in that." Still nothing.
"Hey! It’s not kind to ignore someone when they're talking to y-" The ghoul quickly turns, a rope firm in his hands. Where did that come from? He grabs your hands, tying them together before you’re able to protest.
"Hey- what’re you doing!?" You look at him in disbelief, anger and panic all in one.
"Trust me, it’s for your own good," You laugh at that, yeah right. Before you’re able to mock him, he takes out a piece of cloth and wraps it around your head, specially over your mouth, and it's keeping you from saying what's on your mind. For a second you’re actually fearing for your life.
"Listen, gorgeous. We’re about to pass through some dangerous territory, and the people in these parts would do a lot to get their hands on a pretty litte thing like yourself. You follow my lead and keep your mouth shut, can you do that for me?"
You look for any lies in his eyes, but you genuinely believe him. It’s not like you can argue against him anyway, but you put your trust in him and give a nod in response.
You walk for a short while longer before you actually start seeing other people on your path. They seem rough around the edges. Hostile, but not aggressive, yet anyway. You walk past a few who seem to be intrigued, but not interested enough to take their chance at battle with the ghoul. That is until a few of them start gathering in front of you. Four men stand before your path, making it impossible to keep walking without confrontation.
"Gentlemen, how do you do?" The ghoul seems to do his best to keep it friendly, not wanting to create an unnecessary conflict with precious cargo at risk.
"What’ve you got for us ghoul?" As you observe, you can tell some of them are clearly on heavy combat inhancing chems, might be a harder fight if it comes down to it.
"Delivery, to Halfway. Can’t lose this one I’m afraid." He says it so confidently, completely standing his ground, but still keeping it non threatening. The men seem intrigued, and even exchange laughs between themselves. You wonder what they find so funny.
"That religious sacrifice place? What a lucky girl,"
"Seems like she’s up for a hell of a good time,"
"Fellas, if you don’t mind, we’re on a bit of a tight schedule," The ghoul tries to interrupt their 'friendly' chatter, but to no avail.
"They only take virgins up there don’t they? That’s like their whole point?" One of the guys ask the other three.
"Yeah, it’s some crazy religious cult. They torture them and impragnate them for like 10 years or something, or at least that’s what I’ve heard."
You freeze at their words. That can’t be it. That’s not what’s been told to you. They’re joking, making it up to scare you. It’s not true.
"Crazy rich though, you must be getting a lot of caps for this huh?" Suddenly their tone is not so friendly anymore, but the ghoul doesn’t budge. He keeps his hand on his holstered gun, the other holding the rope that binds your hands.
"Lucky for you, we’re not looking to take her off your hands. This time anyway," They laugh once more, patting the ghoul on his shoulder before walking off, letting you pass. He pulls on the rope to shake you out of your frozen state, and you jolst forward, trying to keep up with him. But you're disassociating, not paying a single mind to anything around you. You're too much in your head about what was just said, and you'd like to say you didn't believe a single word, but for some reason you do.
You keep walking in silence, time becomes irrelevant when you're all up in your head. You don’t notice the radstorm closing in, nor the rain that has already started pouring. If anything is in your favor, it's that you pass by a town with an abandoned pre-war hotel that offer a room for 100 caps a night. For whatever reason, the ghoul decides to do that for you. You don’t ask questions, you don't care to.
Soaked, shivering and your legs just barely keeping you up anymore, the ghoul places you down on the couch in the room given to you. You let him guide you, and for once, you're glad he doesn't have much to say. He lowers himself down in front of you and starts taking off the disgusting saliva soaked cloth from your mouth.
You wipe your mouth your hand, "Thank you."
He keeps his mouth shut and starts working on untying the rope from your hands. You watch him crouched before you, he's being gentle when removing the knots. A horrifying reminder of what you won't be experiencing at Halfway, if the men from earlier was telling the truth that is. This thought is what breaks you, and the tears start trickling down your tired face. There's no point holding it back anymore.
He's looking at you, so clearly trying to hide the concern on his face as he stands up and walks to the door.
"I’ll head down to the square to look for some food,"
Whatever.
Your silence is making him uncomfortable, so he leaves. You stay seated, replaying the words spoken between the men from earlier, over and over in your head.
Everyone you knew had made Halfway seem like such an amazing place. That you were lucky to be going, you were chosen. The thought makes you want to throw up.
You don’t register that the ghoul is back, fresh mutfruits placed in front of you on the coffee table, and though you are starving, you can’t bring yourself to even eat one.
"Eat," he says sternly. You just shake your head.
"M’not hungry," you sniffle, drying your tears with the palm of your hand.
"It’s not nice to lie, sweetheart. You haven’t had anything to eat since the damn radroach. Eat," He's trying to act concerned, but you don't believe it for a second. You scoff and look up to meet his eyes, and he’s looking right back at you, an annoyed expression on his face. You can’t believe this guy.
"Why do you care if I eat or not? Let me be," You're so tired, and all you want is to sleep. Gradually rising from the couch, you head towards the bed.
"Please," his plead makes you stop in your tracks.
"Please eat, you're really gonna need the strength," he seems desperate, almost.
You turn around to see him standing motionless by the coffee table, clearly attempting to compose himself.
"No," you're stern in your reply.
He's growing increasingly annoyed, angry even, because he knows he can't force you or harm you in any way.
"Whatever good condition means, I’m sure they'll be pleased as long as I’m alive, right?" Your voice gradually getting louder. "Being that their plan is to torture me for 10 years and all, they must have lots of stimpacks around to keep me alive enough to birth their whole next generation of psychos, don't you think?" Tears start falling.
"Don’t make me beg again," His eyes are shut, as if he's trying to block out your words, as if they affect him somehow. what a fucking joke.
"You’re so afraid you won’t get your paycheck. Well fuck you, and fuck the caps they’re paying you for this," you say it with so much pain and hatred, and you’re sure you’ll regret it later but you don’t have an inch of fuck to give at the moment.
Suddenly you see his angry features fall, and he catches himself in a cough. It's grotesque, and it seems to be getting worse with each one. He looks at you with disrepair, and you can tell he's struggling to catch his breath. You don't know what to do, but you're getting scared for him now. It looks horrifying, but before you're able to come to his aid, he scurries out the room.
You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding in. What just happened? A part of you wanted to run after him to make sure he was okay, but at the same time you wouldn't mind too much if he left and never came back. Shaking, you decide to tuck yourself into the left side of the bed. Trying not to think about how dirty it is, you curl yourself into a ball and cry out every last drop.
You’re never able to fall asleep, the tears just keep coming. You thought about running away, but knowing that the ghoul was getting paid a lot for this job, he would likely find you again in no time. What would be the point?
Your sobs are suddenly interrupted by the door opening, and you quiet yourself down to listen closely to every sound. The sound of the ghouls boots scraping the floor as he makes his way to the couch, his coat and gear getting thrown down on it. You decide to pretend that you’re already asleep as you hear him make his way to the bed. Feeling it dip slightly as he lay down in it.
But your cover is blown when you sniffle from the snot in your nose. You damn yourself as a sigh from the stranger fills the room, and you start feeling embarrassed about the way you treated him earlier. It’s not him you should be angry at, if anything it’s Margot and your group. The ghoul is just doing his job, to collect a price which he must need desperately, you can’t really blame him. He owes you nothing.
"Cooper," his raspy voice turned soft for a second.
"What?"
"My name is Cooper, some call me Coop. Whichever rolls of your tongue the best."
You feel awful now, "I’m sorry," Wiping away the tears and the snot to the best of your ability.
"For what sweetheart?" He sounds like he already knows what you’re apologising for, but decides to ask anyway for his own amusement.
"For cursing you out, it’s not your fault, and I shouldn’t blame you," You say, already feeling better for apologizing.
You both stay silent for a while, only sniffles from your nose filling the room. It’s embarrassing, you feel like such a child.
"C’mere darling," He says it in such a soft way. You can barely believe your ears. Looking over your shoulders you see him looking at you, only the dim light of a burning candle nearby to light your surroundings. He’s on his back, gesturing with his hand for you to lay in the crook of his arm. You contemplate it for a second, but it doesn’t take much convincing if you’re being honest. You’d take any form of comfort to make you forget this whole thing, even for just a night.
You turn around, inching closer under the sheets, finding a comfortble spot in the crook of his neck, your head resting on his arm. You’ve never been this close to someone except your mom when you were younger. It’s scary in a way, being this vulnerable and intimate with someone you barely know.
Your breaths are shallow, thoughts racing through your mind and it’s making your heart is beat so fast. You can’t tell what he’s thinking, his body doesn’t give anything away.
You lay like this for a while, just a few dry sniffles and breaths heard between you. You recognize the closeness of him.
But you want to get even closer. You want him wrapped around you and have him absorb your whole being. It may come from having learned that you have extreme trauma waiting for you, and you can’t help but want to experience something good and genuine before that.
Your breaths become heavier, deeper, and you feel yourself wanting something; wanting him. This could go terribly wrong, but what exactly do you have to lose? Fuck it. You push away the what if's and inch your face closer to Cooper’s neck, your hands find themselves carefully making their way to his chest. He doesn’t react, and from what you can tell, he doesn't seem to mind.
You see his breathing stop, and you’re feeling brave. So you test the waters, gently sliding your hand up to his chest, letting them glide across his shirt. While your lips carefully grace the rough skin on his neck. You hear him puff out the air he’s been holding in while curiously letting letting you wander, but he doesn’t seem to resist.
When he doesn’t stop you, it’s easy to find the courage to keep going. Your hand wanders further down his chest, stomach, but he catches your hand right before it reaches the hem of his pants.
"What do you think you’re doin'?" He doesn't sound disappointed, more so curious. You feel a bit embarrassed, but you stand your ground, like you've already stated, you’ve got nothing to lose.
"Please Coop," just a whisper in his ear, "Please show me what it’s meant to feel like", a plea, practically begging.
He can’t help but let out a low growl, obviously turned on by the thought. "I’m meant to deliver you as a virgin, sweetheart."
You want to cry again, a sob brewing deep in your throat. "Please, they won’t know- They won’t find out," Your lips find his neck again, leaving trails of kisses up to his jawline, tongue swirling along the rough surface. You never thought you would find yourself in this position 2 days ago, but here you were, begging for a bounty hunter, a ghoul, to take your virginity.
Lucky for you, he seems to be out of fucks to give and lets go of your hand after only a few seconds of thinking it over. You don’t hesitate to let your free hand go under his shirt to feel his skin. It’s so textured, but you don’t mind. You’ve never touched anyone this way before, there wasn't much to compare it to.
Your hand travel lower until it finds a buldge. Being that this is your first time being intimate with somone, you’re startled by the unfamiliarity of it at first. But it doesn't take you long to realize that you were the reason for his cock hardening, and that turned you on more than anything.
Cooper, who's been laying still for some time now, has clearly been contemplating if he should stop this whole ordeal or not. He wants to touch you so bad, show you how good he can make you feel. Have you shaking with pleasure because of him, but he seems to let you be in control for the time being. You didn't mind, and it gave you some reassurance that this wouldn't be rushed, nor that he would force you to do something you didn't want to.
Your hands are shaking at this point as you try to unbotton his pants, and Cooper can't help but to give you a hand in your already broken state. You’re eager, and waste no time removing your own.
"Get over here darlin'," he says with that gentle voice again, gesturing for you to straddle his hips. His length is exposed now, and you feel yourself getting nervous with anticipation. You find it hard to believe that he's gonna fit inside you, it seems impossible.
Yet, you gain the confidence to sit up and make your way across his lap. You're not sure where to sit specifically, but you want to study him further and therefore straddle his thighs. His cock in view in front of you, laid across his stomach, stiff and drooling. Cooper doesn't say anything, but he watches you carefully, wondering what your next move will be. You don't pay attention to him for now.
You do however find yourself curious, and grab the length in front of you. It's warm, and you circle a thumb across the top where it's drooling a clear liquid. You hear him hum under you, an approval of the gesture you just performed. Butterflies take over your stomach, and you feel throbbing in your lower area. You want his cock so desperately inside you now, just to hear those sounds from him again.
"Sit up for me'," the gruffness of his voice draws your attention to him. You obliged without hesitation, "Scoot closer," and you do, of course you do.
He stretches a hand down between your thigs and you're on your knees straddling his hips. Rough fingers run between your folds and they run smoothly.
"Well fuck me, you really want this huh?" He's teasing you now. You nod frantically.
"Use your words sweetheart," He inserts a finger in your untouched hole. You gulp at the sensation, "Yes- yes I do-".
He hums again, moving the finger inside you, bending and stroking. It feels strange, but not painful. "I know you do honey, but I need to make sure you can handle me first, alright?"
You nod frantically, you knew already that you were prepared to do anything he wanted. "Yes, sir,"
Without warning he adds another finger, and it's starting to sting a little. You try to control your breathing as he starts moving them in and out of you, "I know it hurts baby, but it's only for a lil while. You trust me, don't you?"
You nod again, "Yes- Fuck!" He was getting agressive with it now, but he's hitting a spot you didn't know existed and it's sending you to other dimensions in your mind. Your eyes are rolling back while his fingers work hard between your thighs. It's unlike anything you've felt before.
"There we go.. You're gonna be so good for me aren't you, princess?" His words barely register as you find yourself gripping his arm and holding on for dare life to not lose your balance.
"Mhm- y- yes," and before you knew it, his hand is removed from between your folds and you're left heaving for your breath and trying to focus your vision again.
"I think you know what to do, darlin'," You need him badly now, even more now that you know what pleasures are waiting.
You place yourself over his cock, and Cooper watches in patiently as he puts his hands on your thighs, stroking them gently.
You grab his length and place it under your opening, ready to lower yourself on him. "Slow now," he warns as you as his tip meets your entrance, before letting it slip in just an inch. You both hiss, him with pleasure, you with pain.
"That’s it, doll," He keeps his eyes on you as you wince in pain. Taking deep breaths as your hole adjusts itself to his full size, but you’re feeling impatient and start pushing yourself even further despite the burning sensation. You figure it’s better to get it over with as fast as possible so you can actually start enjoying this.
Cooper hums, "Patience sweetheart," you lock eyes with him, and he genuinely seems to care. He lets you have complete control over this, not pushing any limits, and it makes you feel even more aroused, being in charge; seeing his eyes roll back with edged pleasure, yet doing nothing to force his way in.
You feel comfortable enough to start moving now, and you do your best not to squeal when you feel it burn and sting. Finally your skin touch, your ass gracing his thighs, and though it’s still stinging a bit, you can feel his whole length inside you, and it drives you mad.
"Just like that, princess," You hear his soft grunts below, and it reminds you to start moving. Slowly easing yourself off him, just to lower back down again, trying to find the right pace and angle for it to hit the right spot. It doesn't take long before you feel Cooper bucking his hips just ever so slightly to help you out, and he does. He knew exactly how to thurst his cock to give you the extreme pleasure you were searching for.
"More- please," you moan, your hands find his chest to lean on. Nails digging into his already ragged skin.
"God, you feel so fuckin' good around me, darling," His hips buck into you again, pulling himself almost all the way out before slamming himself back inside you. It's rough, and his hands have found your ass to grab to help move you to his rhythm. You're dazed, eyes barely open from sheer pleasure radiating deep inside you. It's making your breath hitched, and your moans spurt out in cries.
"My- fuckn'- god-" you struggle to draw a proper breath, your vision is blurred and rolled back, barely open.
He’s grunting with pleasure beneath you, seeing you completely lost to the way his cock fills your tight cunt, the next time rougher than last. You both sense that you're getting closer to an edge, and that’s when you realize how lightheaded you are, probably from the lack of food you’ve had today, and Coop notices how your figure slowly droops with exhaustion.
"Woah easy darling-" You feel him sit up under you, and without much effort he sits up and holds you tight to his chest, flipping you over on your back in a swift motion.
You would act surprised, but you’re too lightheaded and close to a climax that you don’t react at all. You feel his head in the crook of your neck, breathing heavy and groaning into your ear as he pushes himself deep and steady inside you. Your moans are soft, almost silent, barely there, not enough energy to show him how good he’s making you feel. But you think he gets it, if anything he can see it in how your eyes roll back, how flushed your cheeks are, and feel how your walls are squeezing tightly around him.
"You gonna be a good girl and finish all over my cock, princess?" You feel a hand reach under your chin, placed firmy on your throat, a tight squeeze is applied as you feel his hot breath on your cheek. Sloppy kisses, and a traveling tongue, licking off all your sweat and tears. Having him so near and in control of your breathing makes you feel unbelievably hot. He could kill you right now, right at your high, and you wouldn't mind at all.
"I think I'm- Coop I'm gonna-," you’re whisper in his ear, and it only fuels him more.
He lifts your leg higher, hooking it over his free arm as he goes even deeper. "Show me how fuckin' good I make you feel, sweetheart,"
And with that you think you’re about to pass out, but instead you’re hit with the intense feeling of something combursting inside you. Your head slams back, and your hands reach up to grab the headboard of the bed, your knuckles turning white from the grip. You're dazed, exhausted, feeling the lingering pleasure from your orgasm still present inside your throbbing cunt. Cooper helps you ride out the orgasm in a slower pace while coming up close to his own.
"There you go doll, it's all right," His hand leaves your throat and he unhooks your leg to find your waist, placing them on each side. He's leaning back on his knees as he pumps himself into you, softly, slowly. Soft groans leaves his lips in heavy and hitched breaths as he gets closer.
Seeing you so beautifully dishevelled and limp beneath him, he starts guiding your exhausted body with his hands, pulling you onto his cock, using it to finish himself off. You allow him, cause you enjoy watching him his chest rise with every breath he takes. His eyes rolling back with pleasure from feeling your walls pulsate with each thrust, and with one last squeeze from you, he reaches his own climax.
His hands are grabbing your waist so tightly you can feel the bruises forming already, but all you can focus on is his heaving chest, and his exposed throat as his head is thrown back. Soft grunts and curses filling the room, and you imagine his eyes closed with painfully pleasurable bliss, all caused by you.
He rides out his own orgasm and tries to settle his breathing before he lifts himself off you. He doesn't look at you, but climbs tiredly out of the bed to readjust his clothing. You’re so sleepy, greasy, smelly, but you don't care. You're high, and happy.
You watch him at the edge of the bed, and you utter a soft 'Thank you', just to let him know you're grateful for risking the success of the job. You were meant to be delivered as a virgin after all.
You hear him chuckle from the foot of the bed, you guessed he’d never gotten a ‘thank you for fucking me’ from anybody before, but you just couldn’t help yourself.
"Close your eyes and get some sleep, alright?" Hell, he doesn’t need to tell you twice.
"I think that’s a good idea," You’re not really sure if the words ever left your mouth, being that you’re practically half asleep already. But you do notice the bed dipping slightly next to you, and how you’re gently being pushed on your side. Followed by something warm pressed up against your back, and gentle kisses being placed along your exposed neck.
What tomorrow brings doesn't matter in this moment.
Part 2?
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