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lanadelnegan · 8 months

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One Night Stand

Jeffrey Dean Morgan x Reader

Request from anon: Can you do 2000s!Jeffery Dean Morgan x actress!reader who works on Grey's anatomy w/ him (she plays Izzie instead of Katherine Heigl) but she doesnt know it yet? Like they meet at a bar and end up flirting and having sex in his hotel and she stays the night and then in the morning she's like getting dressed and says "I have to go to work blah blah blah" and he's like "me too" and then a time skip to when she's on set and Jeffery is going around meeting people and she's just standing there in total shock?

Warnings: smut, NSFW, 18+, vaginal sex, single middle-aged JDM, semi-public oral sex (female receiving), this is HAWT - trust me.

"You look like shit." A deep voice chuckles from beside me.

I snap my eyes towards the asshole, almost choking on my drink in the process. Not sure if it's from his rudeness or his hotness, but I cough and play it off. "Excuse me?"

He laughs before ordering himself a drink. "Oh, and another for the lady here. Looks like she could use it."

My mouth drops open as he just.. grins at me. Who the hell does he think he is.

"I'm sorry, do I know you?" I ask annoyed.

"Not yet.. do you want to?" His wide grin stretches across his face, revealing his pearly white teeth. I study his face in the neon bar lights, noticing the shades of green swimming throughout his light brown orbs. This man is stunning.

I chug the drink he orders me seconds after the bartender sets it down. "Not really, but thanks for the drink."

He nods and sips his own drink, raising one of his thick brows at me. "Bad day?"

I sigh, trying to relax a little and accept his small talk. "Just tired."

"Then why are you here? There are beds upstairs, ya know?"

I glare at him. "I'm tired.. of other people. Tired of faking conversations I don't care to have."

He raises both of his brows this time and appears to look surprised by my forwardness. "Well excuse me darlin'. I'll shut the hell up then." He goes back to sipping his whiskey.

Out of all the things he's said so far, it's that sentence that finally puts a smile on my face. "Bout time." I tease and roll my eyes dramatically.

An awkward silence follows after we both laugh. I look over and his eyes meet mine, right before they slowly trail down to my lips. The playfulness in his features fades into a seductive gaze and fuck.. this is the kind of energy I've needed since I've been in this shitty town.

I've been filming for months now, only getting to visit home on the weekends. This hotel is basically my home and it's taken a toll on me for sure. At least at home I have my cats. Here I just have half empty wine bottles, my vibrator, and candy bars stashed in my nightstand to keep me company. I guess when I put it that way, it doesn't sound so bad.

"Are you staying here?" I blurt before I can stop myself. That was a stupid question. Why else would he be at this hotel's bar.

He blatantly ignores me, pulling out his phone while leaning his elbows against the bar and pretends to scroll.

"Um, okay." My lips clench together awkwardly as I nod my head and look in the other direction. "Good talk."

"Oh, forgive me darlin'. Can I talk now?" His veiny hand rests against his heart as he sarcastically grins at me. What a fucking smart ass.

"You know what, no. You can't. Never mind." I get up to leave, hoping he stops me.. and he does.

He turns in his bar stool and blocks me with his thigh as I try to walk past him. "What the hell are you doing?" I snap, walking around his leg. I don't realize he's behind me until I step on the elevator and turn around. I gasp a little, looking up at him. His face is serious now.. all the playfulness from earlier gone.

He backs away and leans against the wall of the elevator. The door is closed but I haven't even pressed the button to my floor yet. He crosses his arms and nods towards the buttons, urging me to press one.

"I'm not taking you to my room." I cross my arms, mimicking him.

"Okay, but I'm walking you there."

The seriousness on his face tells me I'm not going to win this one, so I hesitantly press the number 6 and the elevator starts to ascend as we stare at each other the entire way up.

When the door finally slides open, I start to leave but he gently grabs my wrist, turning me back around. Before I can fully face him, he leans down pressing his lips against mine softly. As soon as he pulls away, I pull his shirt towards me, silently granting him permission and begging for more. My back slams against the elevator wall as he kisses me hard this time. His large hands cup my face as I moan into his mouth. My hands reach for his back as his body presses firmly against me.

He tastes like whiskey and tobacco and smells like leather and musky cologne. It's euphoric. His lips are full and soft but the stubble hairs surrounding his mouth scratch at my sensitive skin. I let myself imagine what it would feel like between my legs.

As if he can hear my thoughts, he breaks away from our kiss, breathing heavily before dropping to his knees and wasting no time throwing my leg over his shoulder. My mouth gapes open as I look between him and the open elevator doors. Anyone could walk by right now and see us. My skirt bunches around my waist, giving him all the access he needs before slipping his fingers underneath my panties and pulling them to the side. I watch his face disappear between my legs and feel his warm tongue lick a stripe from my already dripping cunt to my clit. He moans from the taste and I moan at him moaning from the taste.

His tongue presses firmly against my clit repeatedly in an up down motion. He pulls back for a moment and without warning, slips his middle finger inside me, bumping it against my g-spot repeatedly while gently finding and sucking my clit again.

"Oh my god." I whisper down at him, feeling the pressure building up in me from his finger and tongue working in unison. He looks up at me like he can sense I'm about to explode, and grins against my pussy proudly. The sight alone sends me over the edge and I cum so hard that I think squirt a little in his mouth. He groans at the taste and buries his tongue deep in my hole like he needs more.

After a few moments of him lapping up all of my juices he can possible get, he stands up, lifting me in his arms in the process until my legs are wrapped around his waist. He smiles at me cockily while his facial hair glistens with my wetness.

He carries me down the hall and I point towards my room. I unlock it with my key card. Once it clicks, he kicks it open the rest of the way and quickly brings me inside, his lips never leaving mine in the process.

He lays me down on the bed but I keep my legs wrapped around his waist, bringing him down on top of me as he works on pulling my panties off with one hand and holding himself up with the other.

I arch my back, helping him slide them off.

Once I'm exposed completely to him, he leans back up, undoing his belt and throwing off his shirt, revealing his sweaty chest. He quickly pulls out his rock hard cock and I lean up on my elbows to get a better view.

His dick is just as pretty as he is.

He strokes it a couple times while he watches me watch him. My eyes grow wider at the sight of his precum leaking from the tip and he smiles down at himself. "Look at that, baby. Already got my dick leaking for you." He glides his thumb over the tip and I watch him in a trance, hoping I'm not visibly drooling.

"You ready for me, doll?" He asks as he leans back over me, bracing himself up with his hand. I nod as he kisses my lips and I still taste myself on his mouth. His hazel eyes look down into mine as he uses his other hand to guide himself towards my entrance. I feel the tip of him circle my opening before he slides in me agonizingly slow. He doesn't stop until his dick is pressing against my cervix almost painfully. I groan and wiggle a little, trying to adjust to him. He slides halfway out before thrusting his hips flush against me again, causing my mouth drops open as he reaches even deeper this time.

"That's a good fucking girl. Taking me so deep." His raspy voice praises me before his lips connect with the sensitive spot under my ear. He bites and licks at me while his stubble tickles me. I reach my hands around to hold onto his back and his thrusts grow steadier and faster. I scratch his back hard enough that I'm sure it's leaving marks, but it encourage him to fuck me harder so I don't stop.

"Mmm, fuck." I moan out. His hips slam into me faster and my face immediately burns with heat. My mouth drops open again but I can't form any sounds because he's completely taken my breath away. He stops kissing my neck to look at me again and smiles arrogantly when he sees my face and what he's doing to me.

"Goddamn, baby. This pussy feels so fucking good." His breathing is rapid and his forehead is sweaty as his grunts and moans fill the room. I can tell he's getting close and I am too. His hand reaches between us and he easily finds my clit like a pro, rubbing circles around it with his thumb and slamming into me so hard that I stars. My pussy clenches around him as I lose control, moaning loudly and arching my back at the overwhelming sensation. I cum around his cock so intensely that a tear rolls down my cheek.

"Oh fuuuck. Fuck." He says, quickly pulling out of me. He buries his head in my neck and groans, and I feel his warm seed squirt all over my lower tummy. He rolls off of me, grabbing some tissues to clean me up. "That pussy is straight from fucking heaven, baby." He chuckles as he wipes his cum from my stomach.

I get up to go pee and clean myself up and when I come back in the room, he's laying on his back.. asleep. The bedsheets are hanging halfway off, revealing his toned torso and dark chest hair. I watch his chest rise and fall slowly, taking a moment to notice every detail of the absolute sex god in my bed.. the permanent dimples embedded on each side of his mouth, the veins in his arms, the tattoos on his tan skin.

I frown to myself. Too bad this can't go anywhere. I'm way to busy in my career to settle down with someone.

I climb into bed, not bothering to wake him and fall asleep with my legs entangled with his.

The next morning:

"Hey! Wake up, I gotta go!" I yell, throwing a pillow at his face. "Seriously! GET. UP. I'm already late!" I finish tying my shoe as I yell impatiently at him. This isn’t the first time I’ve slept through my alarm and I hate being late.

He lazily rubs opens his eyes open before looking at me with that smirk. “Well good morning to you too, sunshine.”

I jerk the covers off him, noticing his erect cock standing against his flat stomach. My eyes cling to the sight of it and he bites his lip and raises his eyebrows suggestively at me as I stare at him.

“As much as I’d love to sit on that right now, I Have to go. Look, just see yourself out okay? Take a shower, whatever you need to do. Just make sure the door locks when you leave.” I grab my keys and my purse and head for the door before turning around again. “You’re not... some creep are you?”

He looks at me amused. “You’re asking me that after we already slept together?”

I stare at him and rolls his eyes, sighing when I don't answer him. “Does going through your panty drawer count?” He bites his lower lip teasingly.

“Yes! That counts!”

He shrugs his shoulders. “Guess I’m a creep then.” He winks at me and I glare at him as I turn around to leave once again.

“See ya later, y/n!” He yells.

I ignore him, still pressed for time and leave him to my room as I rush to the elevator. Poor guy thinks he’ll see me again. I should’ve told him I wasn’t interested in anything other than his dick.

The doors shut before me as the elevator descends.

Oh shit.

My eyes widen with realization.

“He said my name.” I whisper to myself.

I - I didn’t tell him my name. Oh my god, what if he is some creep that’s been stalking me. That would explain the weird interaction at the bar. It wouldn’t be the first time I’ve had a fan try to stalk me. Sucks being famous sometimes. I breathe, calming myself down. Maybe.. I told him and forgot? I was tipsy last night. I could have said it. I tell myself to soothe my nerves. I think about what he could steal in my room and mentally punch myself for not kicking him out.

What if he eats all the candy bars in my nightstand. My eyes widen at the thought. That bastard.. he would.

I overthink the entire way to work, but finally relax when I get on set with my coworkers. Ellen and I have grown close over the years. She’s like the big sister I never had.

I sip my Starbucks and change into my pretend light blue scrubs while spilling the beans to her about last night. She leans forward on couch in our dressing room, fully invested in my story.

“Was he.. ya know?” She asks curiously.

“Big?” I blush and giggle with her. “Let’s just say.. it was soo thick. He was probably a good 8 inches in length too but the thickness was simply… chefs kiss."

I make the motion with my hand as we laugh together, fully dressed now and sitting in front of the mirror getting our light makeup done. Our stylists are used to our juicy gossip. They’ve learned to tune us out by now.

I grab my iced latte and Ellen and I leave the dressing room, going into the set where all our other costars and directors are. This is definitely the biggest acting job I’ve ever landed. So many of us are on set at one time.. at least 30 of us are spread throughout this room. Ellen and I stand back, waiting for the cameras to get set up. I scan over my script even though I’ve studied it a thousand times and can recite it in my sleep.

“Oooh, todays the day I get to meet my new looove interest. Denny Duquette.” I say to Ellen, putting emphasis on his name.

“I heard the guy they chose to play him is insanely hot.” Ellen winks at me playfully.

I scoff, eyes still scanning over my lines. “Can’t be as hot as my one night stand. I mean seriously... I can’t get his face outta my head. Or his dick.”

The room grows quiet and I snap my eyes up, worried everyone heard me. When I realize they aren’t looking at me, but past me, I turn my head around and the sight almost knocks the wind out of me. Mr. one night stand himself ... No fucking way.. He definitely heard everything we just said and I internally cringe at myself.

“Y’n, meet Jeffrey.. or Denny.. I should say.” Our director next to him introduces us. My coffee slips from my hand and splashes all over the floor in between us. Jeffrey - I guess that's his name - drops to the floor on one knee before I can reach down to grab my empty cup. He lingers down there longer than he should, looking up at me with the same smirk he had last night in the elevator when my leg was draped over his shoulder. I try my best to hide the weakness in my legs and redness in my cheeks at the sight of him below me.

"Lovely to meet you." He says, standing back up with my cup in his hand. He nods his head towards Ellen, politely greeting her as well.

"Thanks." I reach for the cup and my fingers brush his lightly as I take it from him.

He stands proudly, looking down at me smiling before the director pulls him away to meet the others. As they walk past us, Jeffrey leans down to me, his mouth close to my ear.

"I can still taste you." My eyes widen and his deep whisper sends a chill straight to my aching cunt that he destroyed last night.

He walks away and I'm left standing there.. speechless. Goosebumps appear all over my arms. Before I'm done processing, Ellen leans in, "That was him... wasn't it?"

I nod my head, unable to move an inch. The producers call for Denny and myself to begin the scene and my heart races.

Ellen giggles and whispers from beside me before walking off. "Well... this should be interesting."

The End.

Might make a part 2 because I REALLY enjoyed writing this one. Xoxo

#jeffrey dean morgan #negan #jdmorgan #jdm x reader #jdmfanfiction #negan fanfiction #twd negan #jdm fanfiction #jeffrey dean morgan smut #jeffrey dean morgan x you #jeffrey dean morgan x reader #jdm x you #jdm fanfic #jdm smut #denny duquette #denny greys anatomy #denny duquette greys anatomy #greys anatomy #jeffrey dean morgan fanfiction

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jaded-jezz · 11 months

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Shutter Speed (Part 2)

Jack Champion x Photographer!Reader

Part 2/3

☁︎ Fluff

Summary: y/n is a photographer for the new scream promo and Jack thinks she belongs in front of the camera rather than behind.

(Y/N POV)

"Look who decided to show up!" I hear Jenna say but I am too occupied in taping marks on the floor to turn around. Leah goes over to introduce herself, welcome the late cast to the shoot and explain the plan and rules.

"You must be Y/N?" I hear my name and stand up to correct the voice. "I'm Leah, she's Y/N." Leah turns to me as I appear next to them.

“Woah…I mean Jack, I’m hi.” The boy in front of me stutters. “No! I mean Hi, I am Jack. Sorry for being late.” I hold back a small laugh and smile. “Are you sure you’re Jack? I mean the name ‘hi’ might suit you more.” I jest. “I’m Y/N, did Leah go over all the rules? Are there any questions?” My voice moves back into professional mode as we have a lot of work to do today.

(JACK'S POV)

"You totally played that off man" Mason chuckles behind me, pulling me out of the trance that this Y/N has put me in. I feel my face heating up and I can't tell if its the multitude of lights in here or her stare that burned through my heart. God snap out of it, Jack, you have to do your job today.

I watch Y/N fall into her element and do what, I can tell that, she loves. She is mesmerizing.

"Stop drooling, she may run away" I hear Jenna whisper to me and before I can defend myself, "Umm... next I need Jack Champion over here on the blue mark please" You need me? Ok say less, I joke to myself to calm my nerves. I keep my eyes on the floor to ensure I don't trip but also so that I won't turn into a blushing mess if she looks at me. God, this is the first time I've been glad these lights are this bright.

I follow her instructions, her voice is music to my ears. It's like I am under a spell. A love spell? No lets not get ahead of ourselves. Wait, she's staring at me.

"Jack? Do you wanna see one of the photos?" Leah suggests from the side of the room, trying to break the awkward silence between the two of us. "Oh sure!" I stumble over wires to stand next to her. "No, go over to Y/N, she'll show you how everything works and how the images will be edited after the shoot."

(Y/N POV)

I give Leah a panicked look before Jack turns to walk over. His curls bounce as he hops over the leg of the tripod. "Oh you are tall." I say without thinking. "Oh yeah, but so are you." He answers looking down at me. "It's probably my shoes." I laugh, "Did you wanna see the photos?" I bring up the subject to make sure I don't say anything I may regret.

"Do you enjoy being a photographer?" Jack inquires. That sets me off. I could talk for hours about photography.

"I have loved it since I was 10 and I could not imagine persuading any other career. I am constantly thinking of photo shoots whenever I leave my house. Wall of graffiti? Photo shoot idea. Aesthetic shampoo bottle? Photo shoot idea. I am constantly inspired by everything around me which means my job can be difficult when I am given a strict brief but luckily, whoever hired us, gave us full creative freedom." I wave my arms around for emphasis. But too much emphasism as I almost hit Jack. He swerves and giggles, luckily.

"Oh shit, I am so sorry." I cringe and look back to the camera screen. "It's ok, Y/N" The way he says my name makes a swarm of butterflies flutter in me. I look up into his eyes. Brown eyes used to freak me out because it is more difficult to see the pupil, but maybe I like them a bit more now. Maybe he can help me like other things too. Ew, don't get carried away or you will scare him off.

After our stares last a beat too long, Leah clears her throat and alerts the group that we will now be moving to an outside shoot. She tells them to go back to the changing rooms to get out of their costumes and into the brand we are shooting with for the second part of the day. While they leave, Leah and I start to collect the equipment we are bringing. I grab my notebook for the checklist.

"You are doing great Y/N, especially with a certain someone." Leah raises her eyebrows and winks at me. I roll my eyes and walk over to turn off some of the bigger lights.

(JACK'S POV)

As the group walks to change, I see Jenna and Mason standing by the doors. They are sharing a similar look towards me, it's kinda freaking me out. "He totally does!" "Yep, I can see it in his eyes." I roll my eyes at their odd behavior and attempt to walk past them. "Oh no Mister."

They drag me out of the studio and into the hallway. "Man, when I said charm them with your good looks, I sorta hoped you would also charm her with the rest of you." Mason starts. "Yeah, we knew you were awkward, but not this bad. I wanted to claw my eyes out!" Jenna exclaims rather loudly.

"Could you be any louder? And it wasn't that bad, and I am not flirting!" I shout in a whisper. "No one said you were flirting, except you." Jenna retorts. "We've exposed you without even trying" Mason shouts to annoy me again. "Fine, she's really beautiful and she is really passionate about her job which is kinda cute and-"

"Ok lover boy relax, you don't need to go into detail." Jenna cuts me off with a look of both disgust and happiness, so I know she is just being sarcastic. "We will help you get this girl of your dreams" Mason adds. I can't tell if this is a bad idea but I nod and walk to the changing rooms to make sure I am not late again.

When we are all re-dressed, the cast starts to follow Leah out but I look for Y/N. I see her pacing back and forth, looking rather stressed. I don't know if me going over will make it worse. But I don't have time to decide as two pairs of hands push me towards her.

"Y/N, are you ok? Have you lost something?" "Yes! My notebok. It has all my plans and lists inside. I really need it. Like right now. Is it hot in here? Or is it just me?" She panics. "Ok, you need to sit down before you faint or something goes wrong."

I reach for her hand and gently guide her to sit next to me. I scan the room for a notebook before asking her any questions. She keeps a hold of my hand and I have to pretend not to notice or I might be the one to faint. "Is it that green thing over there?"

(Y/N'S POV)

"Oh my god! Yes it is!" I jump up and grab it. When I turn around, I am again faced with Jack's chest. I look up at him and smile. I feel weirdly calm after that whole anxiety filled fiasco, maybe it's because of Jack?

"Thank you Jack, I think I would've died without this." I try to laugh. "That's ok, I think we need to go now though, I know you have quite a strict schedule for today." He responds.

Jack offers to hold some equipment to make sure I can see where I am going over the pile of objects. When we leave the building I see the other cast members grabbing or putting away stuff in their cars so I take my kit back from Jack to allow him to do the same. I walk over to Leah to let her know I found the notebook.

"I was going to come back to help you but I heard a certain someone calming you down." She says as I stand next to her. "He is definitely your type, isn't he? Tall, lanky-" I cut her off "Yes Leah you don't need to continue. I can't let a silly crush get in the way of today though. It's not even a crush! I've not even known him for five minuets! All I know is his name." I say so fast I almost run out of breath.

"Let's get going while the sun is still out." I shout to the group.

(This is the photoshoot that inspired this series so you can vision this location and photoshoot style)

(TIME SKIP + STILL Y/N POV)

We have been talking photos outside in both groups and alone. It's so sunny outside that no lights are needed, just portable reflectors. Which are big circles of materials that bounce the sun in a chosen direction. Leah and I split up for the last half an hour as we have different ideas due to the location and lighting right now. Some of the cast have moved away to film TikToks and to stand in the shade but some are continuing to model for us if they have less photos than others.

I noticed Jack had finished talking to Mason and Jenna before he started walking over to me.

"Hey Y/N! Is there any last ideas in your notebook?" He asks.

"Oh just this one." I start. "Because of the harsh sun I am are able to play around with different filters on my camera. One of my favorite makes stars in light reflections, would you try out over here?" My hands are shaking as I hand him a small square of mirrored glass.

We mess around for a while, me running back and forth to show him how to pose, how to angle the mirror to reflect light and to show him the results. After a while I am so out of breath that Jack finds it funny.

As the sun starts to go down, the cast all joins up for the last photo including Leah and I for our Instagram. We all start walking back slightly delirious due to the amount of running around some of us had been doing. Jack is walking next to me, at the back of the group, continuing one of our random conversations from earlier.

"You are really talented Y/N, I know you have probably been told that a lot today, but you really are." Jack says in a slight hushed tone. I can't control the big smile on my face. He is such a genuine human being. "Thank you for being a wonderful model." I laugh.

I notice him glance ahead at the group before slowing down and truing to me. "I don't know if i have read this situation wrong but I think you are beautiful and I get feel like we get along so well even though we haven't known each other that long and I am rambling aren't I?" He looks down at his feet and rakes a deep breath.

"I was wondering if you wanted to go out on a date with me?" He finally looks me in the eye as he says this. "Wow Jack, of course I will. I don't think someone has made me laugh this much, apart from myself obviously" I jest. We trade numbers as we catch up with the group.

After the cast all go their separate ways, Leah and I burst out into screams of happiness. "MY BEST FRIEND IS GOING ON A DATE WITH A HOT, FAMOUS PERSON WHOOOOOP" Leah shouts as we skip around the car park, arms linked.

Who wants a Part Three? It will be about pre-date, during and maybe even their reactions with friends after too?

As always, requests are currently open!

Please do not repost this, reblogs are appreciated.

Also some people asked me to Tag them so here you go:

@gwenlore @multi-simp-page @daffodil-darlings @mummatiri

I’m quite new to tagging people so lemme know if you want to be tagged for all my Jack Champion Posts or just this series?

#actress #actress reader #fluff #im so alone #jack champion x reader #marry me jack champion #jaded jellyfish sting #jack champion #oneshot #x reader #photographer reader #photography #shutterspeed #shutter speed

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silantryoo · 1 year

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kim chaewon x iz*one!reader (angst)

WARNINGS ; iz*one disbandment

you watched as chaewon sobbed in yena's arms.

yena's eyes met yours, forcing you to look away.

you ignored the worried stares from your now ex-members. you couldn't cry. not when you knew it would hurt chaewon more than it would hurt you.

you look over to the empty crowd of people as you bit your bottom lip. this is the end.

why did it have to happen so soon?

[august 31, 2018]

miraculously, you had tied with chaeyeon for the twelfth seat. what was originally supposed to be twelve became thirteen.

it was a miracle.

you didn't believe it when your name got announced. you remember juri shaking you, looking at your trainees from PLEDIS, seeing yunjin crying in the stands... seeing kaeun smiling down at you.

it felt wrong to be in the spotlight when they weren't.

you walked up to the stage, trying your hardest not to cry. briefly, your eyes met chaewon's. she was crying too, happy that she had the chance to debut with you. suddenly, all the guilt you carried disappeared. all the blood, the sweat, the tears, it was all worth it to be with her. you nodded, smiling at her, telling her that you were okay.

you guys made it.

[december 12, 2019]

it happened one night while the girls were out practicing for the next comeback, 'FIESTA'.

you ended up getting food poisoning from going out the night before with yena and yujin (the two had always eaten there, so their stomachs were used to the street food). chaewon had offered to stay behind to take care of you.

it was awkward, to say the least.

you and chaewon weren't close anymore, at least not like in produce 48. you decided to keep your distance from the girl. it was too scary, hearing your heart beat for someone you were only supposed to be friends with.

"y/n," chaewon entered the room, bottled water and a bowl of kimchi soup in her arms. "how are you feeling?"

"not good." you were sweating through your clothes. "how the hell are yena-unnie and yujin-ie not dying? i feel like my insides are getting fried."

chaewon sat down next to you, a soft smile on her face. "i think you just have a weak stomach."

you rolled your eyes, covering your face with a pillow. "you're one to talk, kim chaewon-ssi."

"whatever," chaewon chuckled as sat you up, ignoring the muttering under your breath. "just sit up so i can feed you."

"i can do it myself," you huffed, trying to take the bowl from chaewon. "i don't want to be bugging you."

chaewon held back a frown. she mixed the soup slightly. "it's my job to take care of you..."

you felt yourself blush, missing the look of disappointment on her face. you knew that it probably meant nothing. chaewon probably stayed back to avoid practicing, a normal excuse. she didn't stay for you.

what a stupid thought, y/n, you thought to yourself.

"you should've let yena-unnie take care of me." you muttered, grabbing the bowl away from her. "that idiot is the reason i'm here anyways."

chaewon nodded and stayed silent as you ate.

you cleared your throat, sensing that you did something wrong, but couldn't tell what. the two of you sat, neither of you talking until you finished. you whispered a 'thanks' and gave her the empty bowl.

hesitantly, you reached to grab the water bottle in her hand.

"do you want yena-unnie to take care of you instead?" chaewon asked in a small voice.

you look at her bewildered. "what?"

"y/nnie," chaewon whispered, grasping onto the water bottle. "do you not like me?"

"chaewon-unnie, what are you talking about?" you reached for her hand. the room filled with a heavy silence as you waited on the older girl to speak.

"every time i try to talk to you, or get close to you, you push me away." chaewon could feel the tears starting to form in her eyes. "I've been trying so hard to get you to finally talk to me again, but it feels like i lost you somehow."

you swallow dryly. "unnie..."

"what did i do wrong?" chaewon held back a sob. you didn't know why she was crying, but seeing her like this, especially when it was your fault...

"it's not your fault." you tried to reason. "it's-"

"it's yours. i know." chaewon wiped her tears, tearing her hand way from yours. "whatever. i'll tell yena-unnie to hurry up with practice."

you watched her as she gripped the empty bowl, waiting for you to finish your water. you gripped the bottle tightly, trying to find the courage to talk. it felt like your throat had closed.

you grabbed her hand, urging her to listen. "i like you."

chaewon shook her head. "you don't."

"i do." your head hung low.

was this the end of your friendship?

"i like you, unnie... too much." you looked up at her, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "i've been avoiding you because i'm in love with you.

"when we were in produce, you made me feel like i belonged there." you said, barely above a whisper. "you made me believe that i wasn't just dragged there by my company because i was a pretty face. you made me want to debut.

"i'm sorry... i got scared." you let go of her arm, gripping the bed sheet in front of you. "i'm not supposed to feel like this."

your eyes moved in front of you, waiting for her to yell at you, or storm out in disgust.

"how do you think i felt?" you heard from beside you. you can hear chaewon holding back her tears. "you think this is easy for me, too?"

"what are you talking about?”

"y/n, i love you." chaewon sniffled. "i've been in love with you and all this time, i thought you found out. i thought you hated m-."

you grabbed her neck and pulled her closer, placing a kiss on her tear-stained lips. she tasted like everything you dreamt of, and more. you pulled away, holding the older girl as she sobbed into your chest.

"i could never hate you."

i love you, kim chaewon. i love you more than you know.

[april 28, 2021]

you and chaewon had been dating for a while.

no one except yena and chaeyeon knew, considering those two were your old roommates. they had been fully supportive of you two, covering for you guys whenever you wanted to go out on a date. helping you guys switch to a more private room. anything to make it easier. and as much as you both appreciated it, you and chaewon knew it wouldn't last, not in this industry and not in this circumstance.

you just didn't expect it to happen so soon. why was everything happening so soon?

you entered your shared room with your girlfriend. you closed the door quietly as she rummaged through the closet, packing up her suitcase.

"jagi," chaewon smiled at you, the tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

she walked towards you, pressing a soft, bittersweet kiss against your lips. you pulled back slowly, stroking her bangs out of her face. chaewon bit her lip as you pushed her tears aside.

"y/n, i think-"

"i know." you whispered, too terrified to hear the inevitable. "i know we should."

chaewon's tears began to flow faster as she pulled you close. "i don't want to."

you frowned. "me neither."

but you had to.

both of you barely had time for each other as is. after every fight, make-up, and compromise, you already knew how hard it would be once you both became trainees again. breaking up was the only natural thing to do, and you both agreed. (what she didn't say is that she didn't understand. why couldn't she juggle her idol life and you? why did you have to put her first?)

you smiled as you kissed her nose, cherishing her warmth.

chaewon was the type of person to put 100% of everything into something she loved. you knew that you would end up as an obstacle in her life, and you weren't gonna stop her from reaching her dreams. it was painful, but it was necessary.

"what do we do?" the older girl's voice cracked slightly.

"i don't know." you whispered, kissing the top of her forehead. you gave her a smile. "are you almost finished packing your stuff?"

"yeah. i'm going to HYBE after the final meet today with kkura-unnie." you could see the slight fire in her eyes as she spoke. there she was. “what about you?"

you didn't tell her that you might train in HYBE as well. or that you got an offer for YG for their new girl group, or that STARSHIP had reached out to you as well. it didn't matter, you weren't planning to go to debut again anyway.

"i haven't decided yet," you told her honestly. chaewon frowned, pulling back slightly. "i thought you were gonna go to JYP?"

"i was." you smiled at her. you held back a sob as the tears finally began to fall. "but... i don't wanna do that, not without you, i mean."

"y/n..."

"let's just get this over with." you whispered, pulling away from her. the both of you knew what it meant.

chaewon nodded, backing up as she turned to face the closet once more.

"i'm sorry." it's over between us, isn't it?

"it's not your fault." i know you didn't want it to be like this, unnie but it's for the best. "don't blame yourself."

chaewon wiped her tears.

"okay." i love you, y/l/n y/n.

you bit your tongue as quietly sobbed. you headed to the washroom.

i love you too, kim chaewon.

try again?

> main masterlist.

#kim chaewon x reader #le sserafim x reader #lesserafim x reader #iz*one x reader #izone x reader #kpop x reader #idol x reader #wlw

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kei-maki · 1 month

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Thank you for doing a matchup trade with me <3 here's my matchup!

FANDOM: I would like a ADULT MALE MATCHUP for hazbin hotel, please. I don't wanna be matched with angel dust or husk (I have no problem but I don't see myself being romantic partners with them)

ABOUT ME: My name is Jaxrel! People call me "Jax" for short. also use other names like Himawari, Rin, etc, He/Him (They/Them is acceptable), I'm a Trans Man who's pansexual and I've been diagnosed with mental illness and disorders that I do not wish sharing ATM.

Personality(+ Notes): I'm a ENTP Ravenclaw, 5w4, Extroverted. I'm a very chill and intelligent person, I'm very polite and sweet! at first awkward, shy and distant when meeting people, extremely independent, when comfortable I talk about a lot of stuff for hours, loud talker, emotions come off as sarcastic or silly (due to autism), confident, straightforward (I have a urge to correct someone of faulty information), uses "big" words, good sense of humor, playful, entertaining, optimistic, mischievous, curious(l'm nosy and I love gossip), i can be a rule breaker(sometimes don't mean to), dad/ tharapist friend, when | go out | bring water bottles, first aid kit, chapsticks) just in case, chill but some people would say I have some "repressed anger issues, get a reallyyy overractive Brain, tend to get deep and philosophical when I'm left on my own for to long, I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked. If this helps more the characters I kin a lot are: Victor Nikiforov (Yuri On Ice), Tei (Nameless), Cutthroat (Akudama Drive, Except the Bloodlust cutthroat has.), Ranpo Edogawa (Bungo Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu (Bungo Stray Dogs), Space Ishtar (Fate), Okita Souji (Fate), Langa Hasegawa (Sk8 The Infinity), Sherlock Holmes (TGAA), Zack (Final Fantasy 7), Vash The Stampede (Trigun), Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist), Otonashi Yuzuru (Angel Beats), Karma Akabane (Assassination Classroom), Vanitas (Study Case of Vanitas), Zoe Hange (AOT), Shinoa Hiragi (Seraph of The End) + more

things I love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i love kids even though if they can be annoying i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, I love psychical affection a lot so it's not a problem for me, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up everyday despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if i love someone, they'll be seen.

MORE KINS: hiyori tomoe (enstars), yoosung kim (mystic messenger), jumin han (mystic messenger), hanako (tbhk), felix kranken (twf), albedo (genshin impact), shoya ishida (a silent voice), tom (eddsworld). eridan (homestuck), karkat (homestuck), shu itsuki (enstars), miyamura izumi (horimiya), micheal afton (FNAF), lolbit (FNAF), mangle (FNAF), natsume sakasaki (enstars), sora harukawa (enstars), urumi akamaki (alice in borderland), V (mystic messenger), hagumi kitazawa (bandori), matsubara kanon (bandori), shinji ikari (neon genesis evangelion), minami kotobuki (oshi no ko), lain iwakura (serial experiments lain), hajime hinata (danganronpa), k-angel (needy streamer overdose) and more LOL.

Looks: Half Polish and Vietnamese and Half Middle Eastern(Iraqi)/Filipino, I'm very skinny like just flat, I have hazel eyes and some slight flecks of amber and blue, I have upturned eyes but they seem like they are almond shaped but they aren't too noticeable, I think I have a heart shaped face but from different angles it looks more diamond shaped(?), I'm approximately 5'8, 1 have a dimple only on my chin, I have dyed black hair, I also have bangs too, my clothing style tends to stretch widely from comfy to... a lot like this! I wear gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, gyaruo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), scenemo/emo (ofc), & vkei ouji and lolita, I can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as, jirai kei, decora and more so on, I’ve also been told I look like choso (JJK) and dazai osamu (BSD).

hobbies: gaming, anthropology, pathology, theology, zoology, music, dancing, filmmaking, art (drawing, painting, pottery, digital art, etc), learning different instruments/languages, cosplaying, skateboarding, tabletop RPG's, taking pictures of things that I think are pretty, collecting figurines/stuffed animals and puppetry, science/history, soccer(football)/volleyball/ basketball and swimming, cooking/baking, art is definitely my main hobby I dedicate a lot of time to it, I can play 5 instruments which is the piano, cello, koto and bass/electric guitar, I know 6 languages (look in my bio hehe) and I'm learning more right now (which is hindi, vietnamese and taglong if your interested).

Likes: Chocolate, Strawberries, Iced Coffee and Boba Tea, Anime/ Manga, Music, Food, Winning in arguments online or irl, Reading, Cats, Sharks, Animals in general, Cold/or Rainy Weather, Shopping, Abstract or Romance movies, Kdrama(pretty much any asian dramas), Spicy or Sweet Food, Ramen.

Dislikes: Loud Noises, Slow Walkers, People who don't know when to close their mouths when chewing and hot weather.

Love Languages: all of them, LOL. (giving). gift giving, words of affirmation & physical touch (receiving).

Thank you so much! Have a good day!

IM SO SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONGGGGG

But based on the information you’ve given me, I match you up with…

🐤❤️Lucifer ❤️🐤

I KNOW YOU SAID YOU LIKED HIM BUT I HAD HIM IN MIND BEFORE YOU SAID THAT, LET ME EXPLAIN

- First of all, would go shopping with you if you ever asked if he wanted to, might be a bit skidding since it’s you know, OUTSIDE, but if it’s for you he’ll do it

- Doesn’t care what you’re wearing, he thinks you look amazing regardless and will heavily praise you

- PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE P L E A S E Spoon him, especially since you’re taller, he will literally melt in your arms, whisper sweet nothings into his ear before bed while you do and he’ll start crying from feeling so loved

- Honestly pick him up and he won’t even question it, he’ll just be like “oh ok”

- Will definitely show off his wings to compensate for the height though

- He has given you a duck of every kin you listed, and overall just for everything you like or represents something you like, all presents, he just came up to you blushing, like a penguin with a rock, one day and was like “here” and he hasn’t stopped since, and probably never will

- I feel like speaking of presents, that’s a good transition into love languages. This man will gladly accept all of them and definitely needs it. As everyone can tell he needs words of affirmation and physical touch he is touch starved, so like previously said, hold him and tell him he’s the best and he’ll melt. And gifts? If you’re from you they’re the best thing in the world, even if it’s something like a cracker with a flag on it he’ll call it cute and share it with you. Will spend all his time with you, being the shut in he is, and is beyond grateful for you helping around the palace, it helps take away the thought of some of his responsibilities so he can just rest and spend time with you

- As for YOU he will definitely return the favor, always telling you you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him, that you’re his entire life, all while constantly cuddling you and peppering kisses all over your face, and giving you the most extravagant things He’ll has to offer, but if that’s too much for you? Don’t worry, how’s a chocolate scented cat shark plushie sound? Or how about that new manga volume you told him about that you wanted?

(Something like this visually for the plushie)

- I feel like he doesn’t like loud noises either (unless HES the loud noise, which might cause problems between you two), so he’s got noise canceling headphones at the ready to summon at a moment’s notice

- Movie/show date nights watching any anime, kdrama, or hopelessly romantic movie you want

- Will make your tea for you (and will spill it in regards to the hotel of course)

- Info dump to him and he will gladly listen, engraining every single detail to memory, asks questions and shows genuine interest as well

- With you both being mischievous and playful, and you having a contagious laugh, I can see many laughing fits over the silliest of things

- If you spoil him with gifts his heart will flutter, it’s usually the other way around

- Not at all afraid to show you off either, all the PDA in the world. Want to hold his hand? (I’ll take that hand now-) He has four now so he can do that AND hug you, no one has a doubt in their minds that you’re together, he will proclaim his love to you with a 99 power point slide on the News with no hesitation

- Will honest on his fathers name kill anyone who makes you feel like shit or like you have to hide your wonderful personality. That double Hell comment Angel made in the pilot? Yeah, that’s what’s gonna happen if ANYONE messes with you

And… I think that’s it? Lmk if you want more though! I’m not sure if this was long enough ;-; but I hope you enjoyed it! This was actually pretty fun to do!

#lucifer #lucifer hazbin hotel #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #lucifer morningstar #lucifer magne #lucifer x reader #hazbin lucifer x reader #answered asks #match up #hazbin hotel #vivzie pop #vivzieverse #match up trade

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hypersonic04 · 1 year

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Part Three:

Part three, enjoy! Also, two things - I listened to False God by Taylor Swift on repeat as I wrote this, and I feel like things are moving fast between the two of them but I really struggle to write stuff where they aren't flirty so I'm sorry for the sudden progression.

Word count: 2,547

"We're having a get-together kind of thing tonight, by the way. Feel free to come," Adam mentions as we head out of the studio. Yet again, we've stayed far too late, editing and cutting bits of recordings together and changing lyrics. This has become a routine, of sorts, over the past three weeks.

"I might take you up on that offer, if you don't mind." I smile.

"It's just a thing for the label, drinks and stuff. I'll send you the details and everything."

We say our goodbyes, heading home in my now-fixed car, thank God. I don't think I could have coped with any more awkward car journeys with Ross.

Unsurprisingly, he's remained very involved over the past few weeks. It's taken every ounce of willpower in me to not walk out most days. If it's not a riff I've suggested, it's the way I've crossed out a line on a piece of paper.

Once I get home and Adam has sent me the address to the bar we're meeting at, I begin to get ready in a rush. Clouds of perfume and hairspray fill the room. I hurry my make up and haphazardly curl my hair, deciding that the messy look I've unintentionally managed to create is part of the cool-girl vibe I'm attempting to emulate. The black v-neck and leather mini-skirt seem appropriate for the event, yet I find myself overthinking everything when I remember that he's going to be there. Shoving my feet into some platform Doc's, I call a cab and wait.

The bar is so cool. Neon lights, moody chandeliers, a great playlist - the exact type of spot you would expect Matty to pick. I can already tell it's busy in there as the car pulls up, groups of people dangerously close to spilling drinks as they laugh and talk between themselves. The boom of the speakers buzzes under my feet as I make my way in, slipping past people and heading straight for the bar, feeling like the only sober person in there.

"What can I get you?"

I feel my mouth fall open as I recognise the bartender.

"Tom, oh my god!" I smile, half unsure how to navigate this situation. It's not every day that your ex-boyfriend serves you in a bar.

"Nice to see you too." He grins and I struggle to find words. "How have you been?"

"I've been good, yeah, really good." I smile, nodding. "How about you?"

"Yeah, same." He purses his lips in a soft, almost relieved smile. Our split was amicable - it hadn't been working for a while, and it made no sense for us to carry on trying to make it work.

"Are you here alone?" He frowns with a strange sort of chuckle escaping his lips.

"No," I laugh breathlessly, "It's a work thing."

"A work thing, huh?" He grins as he starts making a drink. I nod awkwardly, not really wanting to elaborate, for some reason. I'm not sure why, it's not like he can't know, right? Why wouldn't I want to tell him about the boys?

He hands me a cocktail glass filled to the brim with something that looks like it's going to give me a headache. I wince at it without even trying it.

"It's good, I promise," He gives me a toothy smile. "It's on the house."

"Tom, I can't let you give me this for free."

"Yes, you can. Consider it a 'congratulations on the work thing'." He runs a hand through his black hair and nods at me, and I realise that he won't take no for an answer as he shoos me away.

"Well, thank you." I tilt my head to the side and smile, leaving to find the table.

I spot them across the other side of the room, immediately noticing the huge smile on Ross' as he talks to Matty about something. They're sat at a table full of empty beer bottles already, and an ice bucket filled with Prosecco in the middle.

"You made it!" Matty immediately breaks off his conversation with Ross when he spots me making my way over.

"I made it." I laugh, accepting his hug and making a conscious effort not to spill my drink down the back of his very-expensive-looking suit jacket.

"Who were you talking to at the bar, eh?" He teases as he pulls away.

"None of your business." I joke. He raises his eyebrows with a smirk and I shake my head, swatting his assumptions away immediately. "It was my ex-boyfriend, it was nothing."

"Guys, Iris' ex-boyfriend works here." he decides to announce to the table. Adam lets out an airy chuckle in reply, shaking his head.

I notice Ross take a swig from the bottle of Desperado in his hand, avoiding eye contact as I glance at him. His broad shoulders are tense as he darts his eyes around the room, or rather it feels like anywhere else except me.

"Maybe he'll give us free drinks for the rest of the night." Jamie suggests, joining in on the conversation.

"Do not use my ex-boyfriend as a means of saving money, you cheapskates." I laugh, taking a seat on the plush, green sofa pushed up against the wall. Ross is sat across the table from me, and I realise that not only has the wide smile he'd had on his face disappeared, but that he was also yet to say anything upon my arrival.

The drinks flow easily, and I find myself downing cocktail after cocktail, swaying along to the music and having a good time. A recipe for disaster, really.

Looking down at my glass, I realise it's empty. The drinks had, in fact, been free all night, courtesy of Tom, and mojitos on the house is not a good thing for me to have knowledge of.

"Back again already?" He smirks from the other side of the bar, that familiar shiny, white grin making me giggle.

"Mhm, you know it," I joke. "Same again, please."

"Do you remember that time we got drunk on mojitos?" He smiles as he shakes the mixer back and forth.

"Yeah, I do." Blush rises in my cheeks as I recall the evening. The smirk on his face suggests that he does as well.

"Maybe we could go out again some time? Get drunk on cocktails again, like the good old days?"

Before I can stumble around his offer, I feel a hand on the small of my back.

"You alright?" His voice vibrates through my body as he looms beside me, looking down at me with a strange look in his eye.

"Uh, yeah," I manage to get out, my throat feeling as though it's closing up. "This is Tom. Tom, this is Ross." I say for some reason.

They exchange an awkward smile, and I recognise the look on Tom's face, the same one he used to get when random men would try chatting me up at the bars in university. I want to protest that he doesn't have to be jealous, that Ross and I aren't together, but it's like my brain can't form a sentence, as if it almost likes the idea of it.

"Are you sure you want any more to drink?" Ross says lowly, his hand still on my back firmly. It's like somehow, despite the fabric covering my body, his rough fingertips are burning into my skin.

"Yes, Ross. Actually, I do want more to drink." I turn away from him, that familiar feeling of aggravation from his comment rising again. I turn back to Tom with what I think is a flirty grin, however it could just be the alcohol surging me with a foreign confidence. "Is there a way you can make a double mojito?" I giggle, resting my palms flat on the bar top and tilting my head.

"Anything for you." He replies, subtly winking at me.

I glance at Ross, meeting his stare. My eyes dart between his and I swallow heavily, the dim light of the bar casting shadows over his features. He's wearing a white button up, contrasting with the blackness his eyes seem to be pouring into me, his rolled up sleeve and tattooed forearm on the same bar top I feel myself leaning into. He doesn't look away from me, and I watch as his pale lips part slightly.

"Double mojito." Tom's cheery voice tears me out of the black hole I felt like I was slipping into. I see Tom looking between the two of us, his lips pursed in a way that makes it seem like he's interrupting something.

"I'll pay." Ross moves his arm in front of me, holding his card to the reader.

Before I can object, Tom has the card reader held out to him, avoiding my eye line. It's like he's making some kind of point, whether that be to himself or me, and it infuriates me. He can't stand the thought of not being in control, whether that be of the band, my ideas, God knows what.

"Thank you." I smile apologetically and take the glass, spilling a little over the edge.

Ross reaches his hand out to steady mine, his fingers warm on my skin as he softly supports the glass. His eyes are trained on the drink between our hands, and I watch his Adam's apple bob up and down as he swallows stiffly.

"I can hold my own glass, Ross." I try to speak with conviction, mirroring the same sarky tone he always takes with me, but I can't. My voice comes out quiet, low.

"I know you can."

It's like we're magnets - he does everything in his power to repel me, to be my opposite in every sense, but somehow, it attracts me further, and I don't know why. He's so tall as he stands in front of me, so broad like some kind of shield from the rest of the slowly-emptying bar.

I look up at him through my lashes and the proximity that we're in makes me so much more aware of the amount I've had to drink. My head is swimming, yet somehow, he's steady in front of me.

"I can't talk to you when I'm like this." I say, slipping past him and making my way back. He stays there for a few moments and I watch his shoulders rise then fall, a sigh leaving his lips. I wonder whether he felt like he couldn't breathe then, too.

I sit cross-legged on the sofa, next to George, and despite being able to take my mind off of him earlier, it's like he's the only other person in the room now. Watching him over the rim of the glass as I take a rather large sip, we make eye contact, and I feel like the air is being sucked out of my lungs. I firmly place the glass back on the marble table before me, the sound louder than I had intended with my drunken clumsiness, and leave to get some fresh air.

I gasp for air when I get outside. The air bites at my bare legs, a cool breeze brushing my hair back. I curse myself for allowing these feelings to consume me in the way they are. In the studio, I can focus, I can distract myself from his clear disapproval of me, his need to control the decisions the band makes and push me out, but when it's just the two of us? A whole different story.

I hear the door swing open, the music flowing from the bar to the smoking area I'm currently stood in, and I know that there's only one person who could push a door open with such certainty. I think back to the first time Ross and I met.

"Can you just, I don't know, not follow me out?" I say slightly louder than I expected my voice to come out, turning around on my heel and lightly throwing my arms in the air.

"Sorry, I just-" He cuts himself off.

We stand in silence, his hands shoved in his pockets and mine crossed in front of me.

"Why did you buy my drink?" The question leaves my mouth before I can contemplate it's consequences.

He doesn't answer. Instead, he wipes a hand across his beard and looks at the ground.

"Answer me, Ross."

"I didn't think it was right that he was giving us all of the drinks for free."

"Bullshit." I laugh sarcastically. "You wouldn't even pay extra for Matty's oat milk last week."

I shake my head and kick the toe of my boot into the ground, wondering whether it would be best for me to just leave. He looks as uncomfortable as I feel.

"Why are you out here, Ross?" I sigh.

"I don't know. I just followed you out, I couldn't help it."

My stomach knots as I watch him. His face is serious when he looks up at me.

"You had no right to question how much I've had to drink."

"You've had a lot."

"No, I haven't, and even if I had, it's none of your business."

"You had a full bottle of white wine to yourself."

"Why are you keeping track?"

"Iris."

The way he says my name catches me off guard. I like it. It's the fact that he rarely says it at all, choosing to ignore my mere existence 90% of the time.

"Ross." I repeat his name back to him in an attempt to bring my consciousness back, the feeling in my legs, even.

"You need to go home."

"I don't need to go anywhere."

I storm towards the door, but the thick sole of my shoe catches on the slightly risen slab beneath me.

The first thing I notice is how firm his grip is on my arm when he catches me, the size of his hands. I realise I'm gripping equally as firmly onto his biceps when I look at the proximity of our bodies. My chest is virtually pressed to his, the tips of our noses only inches apart, and I hold my breath.

"Iris, I-"

"Fucking hell, I thought you'd both gone missing or something, Was about to sort out a search party."

Matty drunkenly laughs at his own joke, stood in the doorway of the bar, hair dishevelled and his tie now hanging loosely from his neck.

Ross immediately lets go of me, taking a step back like we're teenagers that have been walked in on by a parent or something. I blush at both the moment we just had and also how distinctly embarrassed he seemed by it, moving away from me quickly.

"Are you coming back in, or not?" Matty furrows his eyebrows.

"I think I'm going to head home, actually." I say, avoiding the glance Ross gives me.

"Already? It's only... shit, it's 1AM." He giggles again, turning around and reentering the bar before I can even reply.

I don't give Ross the opportunity to make this any more tense or awkward. Crossing my arms across my chest and turning around, I leave him standing in the smoking area, taking back control of the situation with the knowledge that he cannot stand it.

#1975 band #adam hann #fanfic #george daniel #matty healy #ross macdonald #the 1975 #matty the 1975

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astroprompts · 5 months

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✧ —𝐁𝐎𝐉𝐀𝐂𝐊 𝐇𝐎𝐑𝐒𝐄𝐌𝐀𝐍 𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐎𝐆𝐔𝐄 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒 [𝐒𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐎𝐍 𝟏]

“Why so gloomy, roomie?”

“I've had tapeworms that were less parasitic.”

“If you're looking for the toaster strudels, I got really high last night and ate them all.”

“I don't know how you can expect anyone else to love you when you so clearly hate yourself.”

“I pride myself on my ability to separate my professional life from my personal life.”

“I really gotta start putting my phone on airplane mode when I drink.”

“Sorry I haven't really been mingling. I get kind of awkward at parties.”

“I'm responsible for my own happiness? I can't even be responsible for my own breakfast!”

“Don't put things in my butt if you want them back.”

“Well, that was another in a long series of regrettable life choices.”

“Well, that went slightly better than the worst it could have possibly gone, so... Hooray?”

“Just like always, you're right, and everyone else is wrong. But if you don't swallow your pride, this is never gonna let up.”

“I'm not stubborn. I'm proud.”

“Is this a necessary conversation to be having right now?”

“You know what the problem is with everybody? They all just want to hear what they already believe. No one ever wants to hear the truth.”

“I want to hear the truth. I don't know if you want to tell it, though.”

“Your family will never understand you. Your lovers will leave you or try to change you. But your fans, you be good to them, and they'll be good to you.”

“No matter what happens, no matter how much it hurts, you don't stop dancing, and you don't stop smiling, and you give those people what they want.”

“People don't usually want to hang out with me after rehab. I'm really more of a before-rehab friend.”

“Morning, sleepy-pooh, you want pancakes?”

“The guest room is yours as long as you want.”

“Ahab's got a white whale to catch, baby!”

“You're not this girl's father, and you're not doing her any favors by refusing to set boundaries.”

“I get letters every day from boys telling me that I was the first girl they masturbated to.”

“You're not my dad. You're just a rugged, older man who provided me with a strong, masculine presence during my formative years.”

“I'm at a place right now where I never need to grow as a person or rise to an occasion, because I can constantly just surround myself with sycophants and enablers until I die tragically young.”

“I'm pumping out heartfelt anecdotes and witty observations left and right.”

“I really want to be here for you in your time of need, but I'm not really good with funerals or death or families or feelings or people.”

“My family made my life miserable, and then they never forgave me for leaving.”

“Well, he was a mean, sadistic alcoholic, who never supported anything I did and actively delighted in seeing me fail.”

“I'm just saying, if you can't find a way to let off some steam you're going to explode.”

“I should've known it was a waste of time to come back here.”

“Look, take it from someone with his own shitty parents; family is a sinkhole, and you were right to get out when you had the chance.”

“The stupid thing is, even now I still just want them to be proud of me and think I did good.”

“Closure is a made up thing by Steven Spielberg to sell movie tickets.”

“This is the sweetest choking hazard anyone's ever given me.”

“This has been fun, and also an offensive display of extravagant wealth, but maybe we should call it a night.”

“Give me a bottle of something to help me forget my problems.”

“I like being around you, and I don't know if I ever told you that in so many words, so I'm telling you.”

“You are a goddamn American treasure, you know that?”

“Am I just hungover, or are you talking like a Muppet?”

“You're the one who's always been there for me, so I drank a lot more bourbon and drove over to tell you how I feel.”

“Every time something bad happens, you come running to me for comfort.”

“We're just two lonely people trying to hate ourselves a little less.”

“You know the worst part? I knew this was gonna happen and I let myself get excited anyway.”

“Uh-oh. People only say they're fine when they're not fine.”

“I spy with my little eye someone who needs to shut the hell up.”

“Here. I got you a beer. It's on the house.”

“Did you think that I spent the last 20 years on my couch just feeling sorry for myself?”

“I think I need to head off to bed, and I hope I actually wake up later.”

“You have to live with the shitty thing you did for the rest of your life. You have to know that it's never, ever going to be okay.”

“You know what your problem is? You want to think of yourself as the good guy. Well, I know you better than anyone, and I can tell you that you're not.”

“You'd probably sleep a lot better at night if you just admitted to yourself that you're a selfish goddamn coward who takes whatever he wants and doesn't give a shit about who he hurts.”

“So... Should we talk about how you just tried to kiss me?”

“I'm not going to waste another thought on you.”

“Bad news-- I lost my driver's license.”

“Can you... Drive me everywhere I need to go for the next three months?”

“You know, with my knack for coming up with plans and your ability to hear them without contributing more than three words at a time, we make a pretty good team, don't we?”

“I was just trying to be a good friend in my own shitty, ass-backwards way.”

“You know, sometimes I feel like I was born with a leak, and any goodness I started with just slowly spilled out of me, and now it's all gone.”

“Why is it that 90% of our conversations these days revolve around plotting sabotages?”

“Look, all publicity is good publicity.”

“I need to go take a shower so I can't tell if I'm crying or not.”

“Maybe I just need to stop expecting you to be a good person, so that way, I won't get hurt when you're not.”

“You abandoned me, and I will never forgive you for that.”

“Unbelievable. When your powers combine... You are somehow even more stupid than the sum of your stupids.”

“They see a greatness in me, and they mistake it for goodness, but I... I know there's nothing there.”

“Look, if you really want to help people, it doesn't hurt to have a little money in your pocket.”

“I kind of think all you are is just the things that you do.”

#rp meme #ask meme #dialogue prompt #sentence starters #bojack horseman

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lifmera · 2 months

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Thank you for doing a matchup trade with me <3 here's my matchup!

FANDOM: I would like a ADULT MALE MATCHUP for hazbin hotel, genshin impact and black butler please! I don't wanna be matched with angel dust or husk I have no problem but I don't see myself being romantic partners with them)

things I love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i love kids btw i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, I love psychical affection a lot so it's not a problem for me, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up everyday despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if i love someone, they'll be seen.

MORE KINS: hiyori tomoe (enstars), yoosung kim (mystic messenger), jumin han (mystic messenger), hanako (tbhk), felix kranken (twf), albedo (genshin impact), shoya ishida (a silent voice), tom (eddsworld). eridan (homestuck), karkat (homestuck), shu itsuki (enstars), miyamura izumi (horimiya), micheal afton (FNAF), lolbit (FNAF), mangle (FNAF), natsume sakasaki (enstars), sora harukawa (enstars), urumi akamaki (alice in borderland), V (mystic messenger), hagumi kitazawa (bandori), matsubara kanon (bandori), shinji ikari (neon genesis evangelion), rei ayanami (neon genesis evangelion), minami kotobuki (oshi no ko), lain iwakura (serial experiments lain), hajime hinata (danganronpa), k-angel (needy streamer overdose) and more :)

Looks: Half Polish and Vietnamese and Half Middle Eastern(Iraqi)/Filipino, I'm very skinny like I look mostly flat, I have hazel eyes and some slight flecks of amber and blue, I have upturned eyes but they seem like they are almond shaped but they aren't too noticeable, I think I have a heart shaped face but from different angles it looks more diamond shaped(?), I'm approximately 5'8, I have a dimple only on my chin, I have dyed black hair, I also have bangs too, my clothing style tends to stretch widely from comfy to... a lot like this! I wear gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, gyaruo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), scenemo/emo (ofc), & vkei ouji and lolita, I can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as, jirai kei, decora and more so on.

Likes: Chocolate, Strawberries, Iced Coffee and Boba Tea, Anime/ Manga, Music, Food, Winning in arguments online or irl, Reading, Cats, Sharks, Animals in general, Cold/or Rainy Weather, Shopping, Playing Tabletop RPG's, Abstract or Romance movies, Kdrama(pretty much any asian dramas), Spicy or Sweet Food, Ramen.

Dislikes: Loud Noises, Slow Walkers, People who don't know when to close their mouths when chewing and hot weather.

Love Languages: physical touch, acts of service & words of affirmation(pretty much everything LOL) (giving). gift giving, words of affirmation & physical touch (receiving)

Thank you so much! Have a good day!

HEY HUN!!! IM SO GLAD WE ARE DOING IT!!

Im so happy someone asked for black butler finally!!

I’ve decided to pair you with……. GRELLE, AJAX & LUCIFER!

She would LOVE that you are extroverted.

She finally has someone to talk to who isn’t boring !!

She also loves that you are independent! It’s what attracted her to you!

It also allows her to be able to do her job without having to worry too much for you- but DONT get me wrong. She LOVES to take care of you.

She loves to listen to you, all day every day. Talk about your day to her. My girl always has an ear out. Honestly she probably has a sixth sense when it comes to you.

She definitely is nosy asf. She wants to get in EVERYONES BUSINESS !! You guys could probably spend a week on gossiping about the same person.

She honestly also has her own problems- and DEFINITELY forgets shit to bring or do. She will rely on you 24/7. She needs someone to rant to sometimes- being a grim reaper is so harrrd!

She definitely does not mind the anger issues. Sebastian was mean enough- if anything she definitely would like it if you yelled at her!!

She probably would laugh a little bit if you started to get philosophical with her- but thats also because she literally will have no clue on whats happening. - she’d beg you to explain it to her too.

If you have an ugly laugh- she does too. You both would be CACKLING 24/7.

She loves that you care for other people- and animals too! It would warm her heart so much. Although she’d be jealous!! She wants most of your attention.

She’d buy you anything or do anything to see you happy. She loves whenever you get happy!! She’d totally buy you shit like chocolate covered pretzels and watch you eat them with a HUGE grin on her face.

Not gonna lie though. She HATES kids. But she’ll try for you 🩷

She genuinely loves that you take care of other people- and kiss your plushies?? Thats so CUTE- HER NEXT???!!

If you told her you loved her? You would hear it maybe like 1600x times a day. She’s def super clingy.

If you went out of your way to try and make her happy- she would literally want to take a BITE put of you. How came she resist?? You are just too sweet :)

She will always be there next to you in the mornings, when you have a tough time getting up. She’s been there on her hard days. She doesn’t want the same thing to happen to you.

With all those hobbies?? She’d definitely make you help her learn stuff. Piano? Teach her !!! Guitar? Oh my god ?!! LANGUAGES?? Speak to her and even if you called her a donkey she’d be all over you.

She’d love to hear about your special interests or more about your hobbies. Like ?? Teach me to skateboard?!!!

She’d cosplay with you. She’d love to do it!!

She LOVES your sense of style. Its so different compared to what she’d normally see? Like pick me? Choose me ? Love me?

Whenever you choose a new style- she’s always in the back supporting you. She loves to show off to other people too. Like- thats MY man.

She literally loves any love language. SHE IS INLOVE WITH HER S/O AND WOULD DO ANYTHINNGGG FOR THEM!!

She definitely would want to bake with you tho. She cant bake for shit, but she tries.

She also will definitely LOVE your art. She needs pictures and photographs constantly. She’d probably hang them on the fridge or put them in her pockets to look at whenever shes working.

Now to Tartie

My man….

Ajax was definitely drawn in at first by your sense of style. He would’ve been staring from across the street with a smirk on his face.

Until he see’s you again. He HAS to say something this time!

He definitely wants to listen to you talk !

You love kids?? God he already loves you? He has so many siblings! And honestly he probably wants a big ass family.

He started to become drawn in by your personality. He needs someone who can be independent while he’s constantly working with the fatui.

Let’s be honest. This man is a GOSSIP. He finna chat chat chat with you all day every day. He mever shuts up.

He loves to hear you laugh. It brings him so much joy Everytime.

Although he feels safe constantly- he knows he can trust his siblings around you,

He definitely would be more reserved when it comes to himself, he’d love that you are the dad friend.

He’s totally gonna forget shit to do- and he can’t always take care of his siblings!

He loves that you have a big heart. Not many people do anymore- it caused him to truly become attached.

He’s so happy that you aren’t ashamed to like what you like- neither is he! Be proud!!

He loves physical affection too- but unfortunately is never really around much for it. He’d always give you tons of kisses on the forehead in the morning before he leaves though.

He’d also try to make ip to you with a bitch ton of presents and gifts for you. Like “ I’m so sorry sweetheart- but i hope this puts a smile on your face :)”

But if he stays at home? He’s gonna want to rot in bed with you and cuddle!

Honestly. He’d probably also have a shit ton of plushies too. But he’d get jealous if you gave them all kisses and not him!!

He isn’t really emotional- but he’ll definitely try to comfort you! I think at first he’d suck- but he has so many siblings he knows what to do!!

Your hobbies?? Always keeps him doing something with you! Like talk to me in a different language?

He’d LOVE to challenge you to sports!! Although he’ll definitely become a tadd bitt too competitive . He just gets lost in it!

He definitely makes you do some pottery with him, and drinks or eats out of the stuff you guys make together.

Probably will fall off a skateboard 16 different times.

He LOVES watching movies with you. I think he’d genuinely enjoy K dramas. This man is DRAMATIC.

He would buy you so many things to make up for lost time together :((

Luci’s Turn!

I mean come on… how could I not.

He was drawn into everything about you. Your style- your heart??

He saw the way you treated Charlie and he was like “that’s mine now.”

He would LOVE to listen to you talk while he’s making some ducks!!

I think you’d both have some rotting in bed moments though!!

Let’s be honest. He needs someone to take care of him. He won’t do it by himself. He’s too scared to even call his daughter.

He will definitely confide in you about EVERYTHING. He has nobody else that he trusts. (Other than charlie but….)

He loves to hear about anything! Gossip to him.. even though hes an old man he’d be like “she did WHATTTT?? NO WAYYY”

I think Lucifer would be pretty hard to get mad at honestly.

He also loves to hear your philosophy stuff! He’s always asking what you think about, and why. He want’s to hear the thought process behind it.

He LOVES that you are also so sweet to Charlie. It makes his heart swell.

Honestly he’s huge on physical touch. If he could he’d always have you touching him in some way. Whether it be cuddling in bed with your 1000 plushies, or having you sit on his laps while he makes a duck that looks like you!!

He LOVES your style. It makes him feel like he has something new to look forward to everyday. He also likes to guess which you’ll wear!

Personally i think Lucifer probably knows every language known to man- but he’d want you to talk to him in a different language! He’d definitely flirt with you!

Play music for this old man please!! He’d love to hear you strum the guitar while he’s doing something!

Or art!! He’d make paintings with you- although he sucks. He’d hang up pictures or drawings that you took, and frame them.

He loves that you aren’t afraid to do what you want! Or speak what you want! It allows him to feel free.

He thinks puppetry is SO COOL. Like honestly- teach me NOW. He’d probably get the strings knotted though.

He’d love to listen about your love for animals- he’d probably buy you one too. As long as it makes you happy.

He’d do anything to see a smile on your face. Buy chocolates, red bull, more plushies, strawberries? He is already on it.

Also wants you to kiss him to sleep.

He doesn’t go anywhere ever- so he’ll always be for you during your low times. He’ll help you through everything.

He’s super clingy too. He’d want you to give him quality time!

He’d beg you to watch movies or shows with you. He’d also get ADDICTED to them. Probably starts SOBBING during K-Dramas.

HI LOVE!! I HOPE THIS WAS OKAY FOR YOU!! I ENJOYED THIS SO MUCH ! 🩷🩷

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soaps-mohawk · 1 month

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Hello how are you today??

Couple more questions

Why is Ghost so challenging (but funny) to write? When he's serious and broody, it's not difficult at all. But when it's time for emotions.exe I feel like I am fighting him. I know it's supposed to be difficult for him to really express them and be vulnerable. But I have made myself laugh while writing because him and their new omega are equally awkward around each other. (He doesn't know how to approach her, she's afraid to approach him and they both think one doesn't like the other. Especially when she's still adjusting)

And I have too many ideas for interactions.

But I wanted to ask how do you approach Ghost and him being vulnerable/open?

(also can I be the 🩰Anon since Tumblr is rude)

Looking forward to the next chapter!!

Hi anon!! I'm doing alright. Got mostly everything important that I needed to done so now I'm just relaxing. Might work on a project I've been putting off for a nice day later.

It's because we know him as serious and broody since that's how he's (mostly) portrayed. We get little glimpses of Simon and his softer side, but primarily with canon Ghost...we're not given a lot outside of him as he is on missions and in the field. The focused soldier who does his job and doesn't really care about much else.

My approach to Ghost involves really looking into how he would express those emotions. He's not a man of words, he's a man of actions. He's not going to sit and wax poetic about how he feels, he's going to show you how he feels. He picks up on a lot. He's used to having to pay attention to details and he probably has an incredible memory. If you say you like something, he's storing that in his mind for later. Like, when he made dinner for the reader. He overheard her talking about how much she missed Mexican food and immediately went and bought ingredients to make her enchiladas. You mention you like going somewhere? He'll take you there. You mention you need more shampoo? There will be three bottles of the exact kind you use waiting on the bathroom counter. His words are going to straightforward and to the point, but his actions will speak to his true feelings.

It takes a long time for him to get there, though. It takes him a long time to trust, and a long time to open up like that. He's been hurt a lot before in the past and the nature of his job makes him extra cautious. He's very much a slow-burn type character and he's definitely not the one to admit his feelings first. Any sort of openness from him is going to come in short bursts and probably won't really feel like much, but in terms of him and his character. His actions speak volumes that his words won't.

Yeah. That's my take on vulnerable Ghost lol.

#sure you can be 🩰 anon!!#answered

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smurphyse · 9 months

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Doors I Painted Shut | Spencer Reid

Smurph's Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Part 7 of Routine Maintenance

Warnings: arguments, mentions of suicidal thoughts, mentions of Spencer's past drug use, bad flirting, makeouts, awkward boners

Summary: Spencer and Emily have a serious talk. Later, Spencer can't keep his eyes off you at a bonfire.

The walk to his room reminded Spencer of the BAU. Every time he'd had to trudge down to the Chief's office, knowing he was about to get yelled at, played through his mind and made his shoulders sink.

He struggled with the sticky door, and eventually Emily opened it for him. She walked in and sat down on his bed, and Spencer plopped down next to her. They sat there awkwardly for a few minutes, all the happiness at seeing one another for the first time in two years dissipating into the anxious pool of memory.

"You look skinny," she finally said. "Are you eating enough?"

Spencer groaned and rubbed his face with his hand, "Ugh, Emily."

"I'm sorry. Sorry," she said softly, holding up her hands in defeat. She pointed to his face, "How are you holding up?"

"I'm just glad it's not broken. I was worried the next time I saw Morgan he wouldn't call me pretty boy anymore." Spencer chuckled weakly, hoping it would make this all less uncomfortable, but Emily didn't.

"So you're planning on coming back to DC sometime?"

Spencer shrugged, "I don't know."

She nodded, looking around the room to quell some of her anxiety as he glowered down at his feet. Emily pointed to the dresser across from the bed. It was littered with bottles from the past few days. "You're drinking again."

"I'm not using. Don't worry," he muttered. He dug through his pocket and pulled out a metal coin, holding it up to her. "I've still got my chip. I go to meetings."

"Of course I'm worried, Spence-," she began, but Spencer didn't want to hear it. He stood sharply and flung out a hand in irritation.

"I didn't ask you to, Emily! I'm a grown man and I can take care of myself!" Spencer didn't know why he was shouting, but he couldn't stop himself.

"Yeah, and you're doing a great job with a busted face and a dislocated arm from a bar fight!" she yelled back, standing with him. "Look at you! You're in the middle of nowhere, getting into fights, going off with strangers. You don't even look like yourself!"

"I'm doing my best," Spencer hissed through gritted teeth. "Did it ever occur to you that I don't want to be myself anymore? Or at least not who I was back then?"

He turned toward the sliding door, making his way toward it. It was still latched shut, the curtains stock still instead of waving in the breeze like his first day. Spencer glared at the lock, but he couldn't bring himself to open it. If he did, he might just take off running for the beach.

"Do you remember how I found you two years ago?" Emily's voice came softly from behind him. "The day before Diana died?"

Of course Spencer remembered. Everything was falling apart. He was having nightmares, failed relationship after failed relationship, arguments with his friends. His mother was dying, a waste of her former self… her brilliant mind was gone. He'd been drinking for days alone in his apartment, existing in a court of horrors led by the ghosts of his past.

Emily came in with her extra key. She found him crying in the other room. Spencer had a 1967 Colt .45 hanging loosely from his fingers, gathering up the courage to put it in his mouth. Emily smiled as she eased the gun from his hand, and he was frozen with joy that someone, anyone, had stopped him.

He looked her straight in the eye as they both cried silent tears. She got to her knees in front of him and held his face so gently his whole being crumbled.

It's been years since I've been low like this, he'd told her. I don't like me.

Emily drove him to his mother's nursing home then, pumping him with coffee to sober him up. He was at her side when she died, and everything became crystal clear. He knew why Gideon left, why he never came back even though he loved Spencer and the team. They were as much ghosts as the people they couldn't save.

"I don't like me," Spencer whispered now as he watched the sun over the ocean. It seemed so peaceful out there, like if he walked into the waves they would carry him where he was supposed to go.

"The next day, when you told me she passed and you gave me your resignation…" Emily's voice cracked as she came up behind him. He had to close his eyes to take the impact of her words. "I thought that was the last time I was ever going to see you until I had to identify your body."

"Yet I'm still here," he said bitterly. Pure venom dripped from his tongue as he said it, and a bit of gratitude. She had saved him so he could spend his mother's last moments on this earth with her, and he would forever be thankful for that. She gave him the courage to make a change and leave instead of ending it all in one final blast of blood and bone and gunpowder.

He thought he'd painted this door shut, but now there was a draft coming from underneath. He didn't want to die, but he was petrified of getting up and facing those demons. That's why he ran away, why he was still running away.

"When you called me from Georgia, I was so proud of you." Emily's hands landed softly on his shoulders, and she pressed her forehead into his spine. "You were alive, you were out there. I thought you were going to find yourself and what makes you happy.

"You were supposed to come back, Spencer."

Spencer turned slowly, taking one of her hands in his. He squeezed her fingers and looked her dead in the eyes, "I'm never coming back to the BAU. I don't belong there anymore."

"You could teach-."

"Teach FBI recruits that the BAU is a rewarding place to work? You and I both know that's not true. Just like the people we hunt, that place destroys people," he growled, baring his teeth. "That job killed me, Emily. I'm out here trying to rise from the fucking ashes, not glue a broken vase and fill it back up with trauma."

"I don't like me," Spencer said brokenly. He passed her and went to the bottle-laden dresser. "I don't want to die… or maybe I do, I don't know."

Spencer licked his lip, looking up to see himself in the mirror on the wall. His hair touched his shoulders, a beard he never would have had at twenty four growing scraggly across his chin. His mottled nose made his eyes look even more sunken in and exhausted, and he even noticed a few gray hairs at his temples.

"I wanted the Spencer Reid you knew to die, and he did, Emily. He's gone."

"I loved that Spencer," she affirmed, but she didn't know what she was talking about. "He was sweet, and so much smarter than we deserved. I've never met anyone so full of love and kindness."

The rage that had been simmering at the back of his heart suddenly went full boil. He hated that Spencer, mostly because he disappeared without him even noticing, replaced by the broken shell of a man he was when he left.

Sweeping his arm, Spencer thrust all the bottles on the dresser to the floor. They crashed on the hardwood in a flurry of glass and plastic, making Emily jump a few steps back.

His chest heaving, Spencer turned to look at her. Hot wet tears soaked his cheeks, grief consuming his soul as he watched his best friend.

"Spencer…" she whispered, her eyes welling.

"I need you to know, I love you still," he told her. "I don't like me. Not this me. The best version of myself is still out there, and I am not coming home until I find him."

Emily's jaw tightened. She nodded in agreement, "I hope he's better than the one in front of me now."

Something in his chest ripped apart at her words. Decades of love and friendship was now the distance between them. Spencer never questioned Emily's love for him, and she was the only one who never treated him like a burden… but she knew the old him too well. He was now used to being a shadow in the night, and here was the light of day exposing him and all of his pain.

"Is everything okay?" Honey's voice came frantically. She rounded the doorframe and into the room, her bare feet coming to a stop just before all the broken glass.

Her eyes flicked warily between Spencer and Emily, and she pointed a thumb over her shoulder, "I'll…go get a broom."

"You don't have to clean this up," Spencer told her quietly. He ran an anxious hand through his hair and gave her an apologetic look.

Honey made a face, "I'm not cleaning up shit. I ain't your maid."

Then she was gone, leaving just Spencer and Emily once more. Emily started laughing, "I really like her, Spence."

He glowered at her, but he couldn't help but chuckle, "You shouldn't."

Honey came back a second later with a bucket and a broom. She set them just inside the doorframe, pointedly ignoring Spencer and flashing Emily a big smile. "You going to the bonfire tonight? Drinks and food on the beach, plus music."

Emily smiled back, then pointed at Spencer. "We'll be there."

Honey tapped the door frame before disappearing again. He turned to her and grumbled, "Why did you do that? I don't want to go to a bonfire."

Emily shrugged, "Old Spencer hated bonfires and parties. Shouldn't new Spencer try them out?"

"Look," she sighed when he gritted his teeth in response. "I'm not going to tell you what to do, even though all I want to do is burden you with sisterly advice. But…"

She stepped around the glass and picked up the broom, handing it to him. The plastic was cool in his hand, light as a feather. "Clean yourself up. Take as long as it takes. Be alone as much as you need to be. But don't you ever forget that if at any moment you need to call me, or I need to get on a plane… I will do that."

Emily's eyes blazed with the weight of her words, and suddenly the broom seemed like a broadsword, the thing he'd use to slay any demon in his path. "I love you, Spencer Reid. I love all the men that you are, that you will be, and that you have been. All these years, all these hurts and loves and losses and I've never stopped. I never will."

Spencer's chin wobbled pitifully as he watched her, his voice shaking, "You promise?"

Emily's hands lashed out, pulling him into a bone crushing hug. Spencer's tears quickly turned into sobs of relief. Deep down, he knew her words were true, but hearing them out loud and instead of in the teensy tiny optimist section of his brain made everything better.

"I promise," she swore, clutching him tightly. They swayed back and forth as they held one another, just reveling in the comfort of a lifelong friend

"I promise."

Around seven, Emily went to get changed for the bonfire. They'd cleaned up the glass together and put it in the bucket Honey brought. Spencer wasn't quite sure why, but he couldn't bring himself to throw away the broken pieces just yet, so he left it by the bedside.

They laid on the bed after, talking about the last two years more in depth than he had ever on a Zoom call. At his request, Emily left out most of the nitty gritty things about work, instead telling him about the team and their families. He told her about all the places he'd been, and she was most excited about the World's Largest places like the ball of twine and the rocking chair.

His shoulder was already feeling better, mostly just sore. He was looking forward to taking it off completely, but followed Dr. Altman's direction to keep it on another day. He even managed to dress himself, this time in an old FBI tee Emily brought him and a blue over shirt and khakis. He still wasn't a fan of jeans, and after Mexico likely never would be.

The summer heat soared while they were inside, and even though the sun was close to setting, sweat immediately formed on the back of Spencer's neck. They walked easily to the beach, Spencer pointing out some of the places he'd found to Emily. She told him about her night with Honey, how after a few drinks she'd spilled more than she meant to.

"I shouldn't have told her you worked with the FBI," she apologized. She'd opted for some shorts and a tee, holding some flip flops in her hand as they walked. "I'm sorry."

"Honestly? It's okay," Spencer decided with a small smile. "Last night, I told the guys about some of my work. They were really great to talk to. I think I needed to let some of it out."

"They all served, right? I'm sure they understood where you were coming from."

"They were all Rangers except for Lionel," Spencer agreed, laughing a bit. "I guess he was in the Army Ranger Wing in the Defense Forces of Ireland. You wouldn't think it with all the piercings."

"People aren't what they seem at face value, Spence. You of all people know that," Emily told him as they hit the beach. He could see people playing soccer and hanging around the bonfire. There was already a nice little crowd forming, cheering on the players. "They're like onions. Nothing but layers."

Spencer grunted in agreement, because unfortunately she was right. He'd judged too many of these people too early. He was begrudgingly enjoying them and this little town. Even Honey was growing on him.

He spotted her as they reached the bonfire. She wore a tiny pair of shorts and a sports bra, running around the makeshift soccer field. Her long tanned legs gleamed in the fading light, shining with sweat and flecks of sand. Her wild hair strained to be free from her ponytail, bouncing behind her as she bolted around.

They were using old fishing nets attached to poles as their goals. Honey was lightning fast, faking people out and running circles around them. Even though she was barefoot and on sand, she showed no signs of slowing down. She passed the ball to Rico, who caught it with the side of his foot, tapped it to correct the direction, then bolted for the goal.

Someone blocked his way, and they fumbled for the ball for a moment before Rico spotted Honey at the corner of the box. He kicked it her way, but it caught air and soared over the players in the middle of the field. Honey wasn't deterred, expertly letting it hit her chest and catching it with her foot. One cannon-like swing of her leg later, and it barreled through the goalie and into the net.

"Fuck yes!" Rico roared happily. He and the rest of the team rushed Honey as the crowd cheered.

Spencer watched with a reluctant smile as he picked her up and set her on his hip, all of them far too excited for a beachside pickup game. Emily made a beeline for Collie, who stood with Rose and Mattie May by the drinks cooler. A strong jawed man stood next to Collie with his arm around her waist as they approached, and Spencer assumed he was Augustín.

Collie made some introductions, confirming Spencer's thoughts. Augustín wore a linen white shirt and matching shorts, his dark eyes locking into Spencer's as Collie introduced him.

His grip was strong as he clasped Spencer's hand in both of his, "I want to apologize for my son's hotheadedness. I could blame it on his Latin blood, but in truth he's a boy lost in the woods."

Spencer shook his head, "There's nothing to apologize for. I like Rico. Plus, I think we're all a little lost, right?"

Augustín flashed Collie an approving look, and Spencer hoped that was a good thing. He patted Spencer's cheek and nodded, "You're a good boy. I can tell."

"Uh, thanks," Spencer said as he released his hand from his death grip. The rest of them chuckled and went about passing around drinks.

Rose seemed to have him pegged, handing him a plastic cup with bourbon in it, then giving Emily a beer. Augustín held up his own to the center of the group and proudly declared, "Salúd!"

"Salúd!" they echoed, clinking their drinks together. Spencer savored the burn as it went down, absentmindedly glancing back to Honey.

She was panting, coming down from her excitement and chatting with Rico, Holly, and Michelle from the diner. Spencer hadn't seen her without a shirt on before, and he couldn't help but admire her athletic body. She was well toned from years at sea and working with tools, a nice sheen of sweat glimmering off her skin from running around.

He hadn't seen her smile very much, but it looked good on her. She waved her hands around as she spoke animatedly, making them all laugh. Rico stood a respectable distance away from her, but they seemed to have made up with the way she talked with him. He was happy about that. The thought of being a point of contention between them left a sour feeling in his gut.

"Just like that," Emily murmured as she elbowed him lightly, "an IQ of 187 is slashed to 60."

"Shut up," he growled back playfully, but he couldn't seem to tear his eyes away. She was truly a beautiful woman who held herself with confidence, even if it contained an overwhelming grief. She put on a good front in front of her friends, one she didn't seem to put the effort into showing Spencer.

She caught his eye, trailing off and letting her friends take over the conversation. Excusing herself, she went over to him, and Spencer broke away from Emily and his group to meet her halfway.

"What happened to, 'that doesn't sound like my idea of a good time?'" Honey asked playfully, badly mimicking his voice.

"Maybe I'm tired of being Mr. Buzzkill," he replied easily, making her laugh. Spencer pointed toward the cooler behind him, "Can I get you a drink?"

She shook her head slowly, giving him a soft smile. "I'm gonna stick with water tonight."

"Brave girl," he marveled, taking a cheeky sip of his bourbon. In situations like this, it became his lifeline, something to hold onto.

They stood there for a while, silently sizing one another up. Honey's coy smile set a fire in his belly, though a part of his brain wanted to blame it on the alcohol. She waved a stray hand to his sling.

"How's the arm?" she asked with a wide grin that he couldn't help but return.

"Getting better. I'm looking forward to taking it off tomorrow."

"Good," she murmured, but as stilted as this conversation was she didn't seem uncomfortable. Instead she took a few steps closer until she was at his side, looking off at the ocean. He preferred looking at her.

"You ever sail?"

Spencer shook his head, "I'm not a strong swimmer."

Her eyes trailed the distance to the sunset, stretching far away. A light breeze caught her hair and made it dance in time with the waves, and she made no move to tuck that wildness away.

"I miss it."

Spencer nudged her a bit with his elbow, and she turned to look at him with a soft swell of grief. A quote surfaced in his mind at the sight of her resilience, the gaping wound that would never quite heal. Give your tears back to the ocean. You have no use for them anymore.

He almost said it aloud, but it was too personal. Instead he gave her a weak smile and said, "Good thing it isn't going anywhere anytime soon."

Honey smiled, a pretty shy smile as her bruised cheeks flushed. She rubbed an anxious hand over her neck as she glanced away from him, quickly catching sight of the water and pointing out toward it.

"There's nothing like the smell of the salt water. Chasing the sunset…letting everything go and knowing you're nothing out there." He eyes faded once more, adventure taking over as a memory clicked in her mind. Her voice was soft as she continued, "You're at the mercy of the gods… They'll guide you home, or pull you under."

"That sounds like life," Spencer whispered. "You either give up under the water or fight to break the surface."

Honey cocked her head and watched him softly in the fading light. Her mouth quirked into a thoughtful smile, "What happens if you're too tired of treading water?"

Spencer shrugged, making a face, "You find someone to help hold you up."

"And if they're not a strong swimmer?"

That surprised him, but she couldn't be talking about him. She barely knew him, and didn't seem to want to. Was she just asking for advice? Did she want to know how he'd made it this far with what she now knew of him? Maybe she was testing him.

Spencer's gaze bored into hers, though, his voice strong. "Then you teach them how. You save each other."

Honey seemed satisfied with his answer, and she nodded in reply. She turned to look at her feet, kicking the sand as she gathered her thoughts. Everyone around them chatted happily, focused on one another as Spencer and Honey stood off to the side. He hadn't realized how much they inched together during their conversation until her shoulder brushed his. The final blaze of the sun caught her cheekbones and shoulders, that summer tan the perfect shade. Despite the bruises, Spencer admired the slope of her nose, the way it framed her face so nicely.

He wanted to reach out and touch her, run his fingers along the curve of her jaw and trail them over the back of her neck. Through the bourbon and loneliness, he imagined his palm would fit nicely there, his thumb rubbing that sensitive spot behind her ear. Maybe she'd even close her eyes and sigh at the feeling.

She caught him staring, that gentle curve of her sweet smile reacting to his gaze. Spencer cleared his throat and chose to watch his drink instead. Maybe he should stop while he was ahead.

A call from the group later and they joined them around the bonfire. Honey sat next to Holly and Michelle, Collie and Augustín on her other side. Spencer would look up just in time to see Honey avert her gaze somewhere else, and he couldn't help but do the same each time she did as well.

Eventually someone brought out a guitar, someone else some cymbals. They passed it around, smoking, drinking, and eating and listening to a few songs. In between glances from Honey, Spencer spotted Rico watching them both with his brows furrowed. Spencer tried to stop after that, not wanting to ruin this burgeoning friendship with him, but it was as if his eyes were magnetized to her.

The soft glow of the firelight hugged her cheeks, illuminating her smile every time she laughed at something someone said. She clutched a water bottle tightly in her lap as she sat cross legged in a lawn chair. After the sun went down and the air cooled, she started rubbing her arms and scooting closer to the fire. If all of these people weren't around, he likely would have given her his flannel. It would look good on her.

Emily sat next to him, chatting easily with Mattie May and Rose. She was going to leave in the morning, so he tried to join in where he could, not wanting to waste this time with her. He'd missed her more than he cared to admit, but he glanced over again to catch Honey again quickly averting her eyes from him.

It was a good night of hanging out on the beach, and after a few drinks Spencer found himself comfortable enough to doze. It was strange for him to sleep in a public place. Even on cases, Spencer was restless and awake every hour or so, but with Emily by his side and a group of people who had been nothing but kind to him, he let himself release a bit of tension and fell asleep.

He woke up to a soft hand on his shoulder, sniffling hard and adjusting his tired eyes to the light. Honey kneeled in front of him with a gentle smile, rubbing her palm softly so as not to jolt him awake.

“What time is it?” he asked gruffly. He rubbed his face as she let out a soft chuckle. “Where’s Emily?”

“It’s about one in the morning, and she went to Collie’s with Rose, Mattie May and the De La Cruz’s,” she told him, but she didn’t pull away. The warmth from her hand bled through his shirt, his lonesome skin drinking in every drop of physical touch it could. “C’mon, I’ll take you back to the Inn.”

She held out her hand for him as she stood, and he let his palm slide over hers. He could have sworn her fingers squeezed his for a moment before letting go. Nobody else was around, instead they were off on different sections of the beach, leaving just him and Honey alone by the smothered fire.

"You don't have to leave the party if you don't want to," he said awkwardly, but she just shook her head.

"Everyone's pretty drunk and it's no fun being the sober one," she chuckled, then beckoned for him to follow. He did, and they made their way up the beach. By Spencer's memory he must have fallen asleep around ten, so three hours later he was pretty sobered up. His head hurt a little bit, but other than that he was fine.

The stars shone so brightly that if he reached up his hand Spencer swore he could grab one right out of the sky. The glittering blanket above stretched for miles, kissing the sea behind them. Even the lights from town couldn't drown them out.

"You can see everything out here," Spencer marveled as they walked. They weren't in a hurry, and the night was a nice temperature with the slight breeze, so they went about slowly. "The sky is so clear."

"You don't have that in DC?" Honey asked lightly. She still wore only her sports bra and shorts, her hands rubbing her arms to keep warm.

"There's too much light pollution," he said, shaking his head. Spencer found himself removing the velcro of his arm brace, letting his arm down slowly. Most of the pain was gone, the bruises the only thing left of the fight a few days ago. "It was like that where I grew up too."

She watched him idly as he tucked the brace under his armpit and shrugged off his flannel. He handed it to her without a word, and she slipped it on with a small smile. It nearly swallowed her shorter frame, coming just above her knees. Spencer regretted giving it to her. She was far too cute like that. He just wanted to pick her up and carry her home.

"Where did you grow up?"

"Las Vegas."

She made a pleased noise, “Ahh, so you know how to count cards?”

Spencer squinted her way, chuckling, “Yeah?”

“Good, keep that to yourself,” Honey told him seriously. “There’ll be a poker night one of these days and you and I will clean up.”

Spencer shook his head and laughed, and they walked the rest of the way mostly in silence. It wasn’t a long journey, just up the hill, but at night Spencer had to admit he would have had a harder time finding it than in the day.

He held the door open for Honey as they stepped into the Inn. The walk to his room felt shorter than before all of a sudden, almost unfairly. Honey's door to her apartment was right across from his, and she unlocked the door and pushed it open. Lingering in the doorway, she leaned against the frame. Spencer made no move for his own door, instead content just standing there watching her as she thought of what to say next.

"I'm glad you came out," she said after a bit, giving him another one of those soft smiles that made his chest hot. "And Emily. I like her."

"She likes you," he replied softly. "Thanks for inviting me. I had a good time."

"Good…" She trailed off, tapping the door frame absentmindedly. "Where do you think you'll go after this?"

"Probably Oregon," he said, "it's where I was going anyway."

Honey scoffed, "Oregon doesn't have anything on Thunderbird."

"Funny. That's what Nell said."

She squinted at him playfully, "That guy's crazy, you know."

"So are you."

Spencer was close enough to feel her body heat. His shirt hung open to show off her physique, toned and glistening in the dim light. He could even smell the sweat on her skin, those big eyes of hers watching him and waiting for his next move. Later he would blame it on the bourbon, but realistically Spencer knew he was sober. She just looked so damned good, and it had been so long. He wanted to feel her hands on his skin again, soft fingertips grazing up his back.

“I should give you this back,” Honey decided. She moved to slip the flannel from her shoulders, but Spencer's hands reached out, dropping the arm brace in the doorway.

“No,” he muttered, grabbing it by the lapels and pulling it back over her. Spencer tugged it closed, but he didn’t button it, instead holding it there with his hands as he looked down at her.

Honey swallowed thickly, her eyes hooded. She watched him through her lashes, so soft and sweet like that in his clothes… Spencer didn’t even realize he was stepping forward until her chest brushed against his sternum. His hand slid from the shirt to glide over her shoulder and up her neck, cupping her jaw in his palm. The other wrapped around her waist as he leaned down and pressed his lips to hers.

Honey let out that sigh of relief he’d imagined as he kissed her, but in reality it was so much better than in his head. Her palms brushed their way up his chest until they wrapped around his neck. Her back arched as his thumb brushed her spine. Spencer flattened his palm to pull her hips flush with his.

She didn't fight him, didn't smack or yell like a part of him thought she might. She melted into his embrace, kissing him back fervently. Spencer's fingers tangled into her ponytail, giving a soft tug and pressing his tongue against her bottom lip, demanding entrance. Honey moaned breathily as she let him in, making his chest swell with desire. Her body molded to his as he pressed her against the doorframe, small and strong and pulling just as much as she pushed. She tasted like salt water taffy, a bit like citrus, and he wanted more.

The hand on her back slipped down over her ample backside, giving her ass a rough squeeze before making his way down behind her thigh. She read his mind, hopping up as he lifted her and shoved her inside. His shoulder ached from the strain, but his lonely mind ignored it. Spencer pushed her up against the wall at the bottom of the stairs, grinding himself against her clothed core.

His cock stirred in his pants, her soft moans only making him harder as they made out like horny teenagers. Her scent consumed him, making his head swim with lust. He hadn't been touched like this in so long, and hadn't been able to touch like this either. Spencer squeezed every part of her supple body he could, loving the way her soft skin molded to his hands.

Honey was growing restless, her strong thighs clenching around his waist for friction. Spencer's free hand wandered under the flannel she wore, palming her soft belly and slipping it up to her breasts. She gasped as he ran the pad of his thumb over her nipple through the thin fabric of the sports bra, making him smile in satisfaction against her lips.

He trailed kisses down her jaw to her neck, grazing his teeth along the sensitive flesh. Honey's hands tangled into his hair as he nipped and sucked a line to her collar bone, a shuddering whine escaping her kiss-bitten lips.

"Thanks for walking me back," Emily's voice came from down the hall, making them both still. "I don't know where Spencer got off to."

In a swift movement, Spencer pulled Honey further into the doorway. He shut the door softly, turning the handle so the latch didn't sound out their location. With his nose buried in her neck, they stood there catching their breaths as quietly as they could as the footsteps approached.

Spencer's heart pounded in his chest when he heard Rose's voice, "I'm sure he called it an early night. We kept him up late last night."

Spencer tore himself away from the taste of Honey's skin to look at her. She was watching the crack of the door, still holding tightly to him. Her lips were red and swollen, patches of blush and fresh bite marks littering her neck and chest.

He couldn't help himself, so he pressed his lips to her neck. Spencer kissed his way to her jugular, swiping his tongue over it before giving her a soft bite. She sucked in a sharp breath, whispering through gritted teeth, "Fuck…"

"He said he had a really good time. Thanks for taking him out," Emily told him just as they passed the door Honey and Spencer were sinfully hiding behind. "He deserves to have some fun."

Spencer didn't really want to listen to them talk, instead wanting to bury himself deep inside this girl and feel her shudder around him. He pulled her off the wall and turned to go up to the apartment, but she pinched him.

"The stairs creak," Honey warned him under her breath, so Spencer set her against the wall again and buried his face in her chest, letting out an irritated groan.

Honey chuckled and patted his hair, almost making his leg thump like a dog’s. Her nails grazed his scalp, earning a guttural happy grunt from him. Spencer kissed the tops of her breasts softly, making his way up to her jawline once more before capturing her lips with his.

He didn’t want to lose this momentum. He wanted to barrel toward release, and his mind swam with heady desire. Fuck, all he wanted was to listen to her make those sounds loud enough to crack the windows. She tried to hold back her noises as she kissed him back, but Spencer wanted to rip them from her over and over again… but Rose and Emily had other plans to ruin his night and his boner.

“Honey does too,” Rose muttered, but Honey heard it sure enough. They pulled slowly away from one another as he continued. “Since her husband died she’s just been… stuck. I’ve spent the last decade watching her be miserable and accepting no help.”

“Sounds like you have your own Spencer then,” Emily chuckled as Spencer and Honey had to look away from one another. “Maybe they’ll do one another some good.”

“Goodnight,” Rose said after a moment, and Emily returned it. Spencer listened until they heard the door shut and lock before turning back to her.

Honey swallowed thickly, but unlike before it was with anxiety instead of sexual tension. Her chest heaved, his moving in time. She let her hands fall from him and clenched them in front of her chest, so Spencer lowered her slowly to the floor.

She watched him with those wide eyes as her feet hit the ground, neither of them quite sure what to do. Rose and Emily unknowingly slammed them with a thousand pounds of pressure when ten minutes ago all they were thinking about was getting laid.

“I, uh, I should probably go,” Spencer muttered awkwardly as he took his hands off her tight unbelievably sexy body. “I’ve… been drinking. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Right,” she whispered back, but Spencer could tell it hurt her a bit by the way she looked to the left to avoid his gaze. “Thanks for… walking me home.”

“Yeah,” he agreed, even though she’d walked him back.

She tugged on the sleeve of the flannel. “Do you want this back?”

“No,” he told her again, gripping the lapels and pulling them closed over her scantily clad body. “Goodnight.”

Honey nodded and headed up the stairs without another word or a backward glance. Spencer waited for her to reach the top before heading back to his own room. He picked up the arm brace before opening her door and shutting it behind him. Spencer managed to get his sticky door open, quickly shutting it behind him.

Locking it, Spencer stood with his back against the hardwood, staring wide eyed at the sliding door. He could see people partying in the distance, but all the joy of the night dissipated with his hard-on.

“What the fuck did I just do?”

Smurph's Masterlist | Series Masterlist

Notes: I love how much of a soft hardass Emily can be... as for Spencer and Honey? Oh I want them to screw so badly right now but unfortunately we have to wait ;)

Also, have you guy listened to any of the songs that these chapters are inspired by? Which one is your favorite?

@thedancingcostumeyoungadult @muffin-cup @simplyparker @spencerreidsmommy @hotchandspencearedilfs @gspenc @kbakery @nomajdetective @givemeth @hoshihiime @halloween-is-my-nationality @reidselle @thisiscalmanditsdoctorreid @dreatine @thebloomingeagle @fortheloveofwonderland @theforgottenwinter @parkerreidnorth @reidselle @randomhoex @scargarcia-magshotchner @stitchwrites @pygmygoat-bicyclehelmet @cle13 @aysixdy @elhotchner @directioner5life @elhotchner @loveeee2134 @preciousbabypeter @la-stuffs @stories-you-wont-hear @hotchlover @fortheloveofwonderland @lokiandhisdagger @bellanutellababyyy @dark-night-sky-99 @straightforbuckybutgayfornatasha @maltamurdock @charelletjee @kansas-reid @zephyrmonkey @spencer-reid-wonderland @spencersprettyslut @im-sure-its-fine @tvdstelenaforever @teddylupintonks @lilibet261 @kneelforloki @dirtytissuebox @almostgenerallyalways @whovian378 @cl0udyqu33n @thegettingbyp2 @averagestudent03 @the-sun-died-out @squishycalumxo @sebastiansstanswhore

@louderfortheback @pandabiiissh @calebye

@dottirose @lfaewrites @padsfirewhisky @wheels-upin-thirty @f-me-reid @justanothercmblog @academiareid @moyo5653 @comfybabie

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final-girl96 · 22 days

Text

Broken World: Chapter Twenty-Seven

Flashback

August 2003

I was home from college for summer break. I was alone in the house, seeing as my father and his family, that didn't include me, went on vacation. I don't mind that they excluded me, though. I prefer to be here by myself, and besides, I have Daryl to hang out with. I was heading to the garage now with subs and drinks. I haven't seen Daryl since I came home for Christmas and we haven't talked much since I've been home. I had started out living at home when I started going to college, but It became too much, and I decided to just live on campus in the dorms. It was too stressful at home with my stepmother and her awful children.

I walked into the office and greeted Mary, “Hello, Mary.” She looked up, and a wide smile took over her face. “Well, look who it is! How are you, darling girl?” I smiled at her and leaned on the counter. “I'm doing good. Thought I would bring Daryl some lunch,” I said. “Well, he's in the back. He is due for a break. I've been tryin’ to get him to take one, but he just brushes me off,” she said. I rolled my eyes and chuckled. “Of course he did. I'll get him to take one. The bell over the door dinged, and a man walked in, so I headed to the back.

I walked into the garage and found Daryl under a station wagon. “Don't you think it's about time you take a break, Dixon?” He paused what he was doing and pushed himself out from under the car and looked up at me. “The hell ya doin’ here?” He asked. I raised my eyebrows at him. “Nice to see you too, asshole. I brought you lunch, so come on!” I said, turning around and walking to the door that led to the back of the building out to the picnic table.

I sat down and placed the subs and drinks on the table. A couple of minutes later, Daryl walked out the back door, wiping his hand with a red cloth. “Ya didn't need to buy me lunch, coulda got it myself.” I rolled my eyes at him, “Sit down and eat, Daryl. Besides, we both know you wouldn't have eaten anything until you got off work.” He scoffed and took the sub I pushed towards him. Things have been awkward between us since Christmas. So we sat in silence for most of lunch.

Christmas 2002

I sat in the living room of my father's house. My step-brothers ripping their presents open. I sat in the chair in the corner of the room, bouncing my leg up and down. I didn't want to be here anymore. Cheryl had greeted me with a backhanded comment and a fake smile. My father said nothing as usual. I didn't bother bringing presents. They would have thrown them away or given them away so it wasn't worth the money or time.

I kept looking at the clock during lunch. Daryl was supposed to be picking me up at two o'clock. We were going to hang out and then go out to dinner. I was staying in the motel just outside of town since Cheryl turned my room into her crafting room. “Are we boring you, yn?” My eyes snapped to look at my father. He picked his glass of whiskey up, bringing it to his lips and taking a small sip. “No. No, I'm just supposed to be meeting Daryl soon, that's all.”

My stepmother scoffed, and I saw her shake her head out the corner of my eye. I looked over at her with a raised eyebrow. “What was that scoff for?” I asked, narrowing my eyes at her. She took a sip of her wine because it didn't matter what time of day it was. She always had a glass of wine or a whole bottle with every meal. “I just don't think you should spend your time with people like the Dixon's.”

“People like the Dixon's? I only hang out with Daryl. Who, by the way, is nothing like his father or his brother!” she scoffed again and rolled her eyes. “He likes to screw underage girls,” she said, giving me a pointed look. My eyes widened, and I stood up, sliding the chair back, almost toppling it over. “I will have you know that Daryl has never, and I mean NEVER, touched me or any other underage girl like that!” I looked at my father, who hadn't said a word. “I'll be getting all my stuff out of your house. Maybe try and keep your bitch on her leash!”

I grabbed my jacket and bag and walked out the door, slamming it in my wake. I got into my car and headed to the motel I was staying at. When I got into my room, I called Daryl. “Hello?” I let out a breath when it was him who answered and not his father or brother. “Hey, it's me. I just want to let you know I'm back at the motel,” I told him. He hummed, “Wanna talk about what happened?” He asked. I shook my head even though he couldn't see me. “Not on the phone. Can you come over now?” I asked. “Mmhmm…I'll be there in thirty.”

I hung the phone up and jumped across the bed, and went into the bathroom. I wanted to get a quick shower before he got here, I wanted to get the smell of Cheryl's Christmas candles and whatever else she sprayed in the house, off of me. I took one last night, so I didn't need to wash my hair. I would be done way before Daryl got here. I jumped in, washed my body, and shaved while I was at it, then got out.

Just as I was pulling an oversized knitted sweater on, a knock sounded through the room from my door. I pulled my hair out from the collar and rushed to the door. Looking through the peephole conformed, it was Daryl and not some weirdo. I unlocked the door, pulled it open, grabbed Daryl's arm, and pulled him inside. “The fuck?” I shut and locked the door again, shivering from the cold air that hit my bare legs. “It's cold,” I said, turning around and shrugging.

“Well, put some damn pants on,” Daryl said. A faint blush crept up on his cheeks. He had a bag dangling from his left wrist and a pizza in his hand. “Christmas pizza?” I asked, walking over to the bed. “Oh and I have shorts underneath my sweater so you can relax. I sat down on the edge of the bed, grabbed my socks, and pulled them on. They came just above my knees. Daryl sat the pizza on the small table in the corner and set the bag on top. “What's in the bag?” I asked, crawling across the bed and trying to peek around him.

“Why are ya so damn nosey?” He moved to block my view more, so I jumped up so I was standing on the bed, wrapped my arms around his neck from behind, and jumped onto his back. He huffed out a breath, grabbing my legs with his hands before I could fall back down. “The fuck is wrong with ya?”

“I want to see what's in the bag!”

He backed up so he was closer to the bed and let me drop down with a bounce. “If you were fuckin’ patient or ya ain't gettin’ shit!” I smiled, “You got me something?” I asked. I couldn't see his face but I knew he was blushing. “Don't stop being a little shit you won't get nothing,” he grumbled. I sat down and criss-crossed my legs, pulling a pillow onto my lap and hugged it. “Fiiiiine!”

“Now, it ain't much, and ya don't have to wear it if ya don't want to. I can't take it back if ya don't like it,” he said, turning around. When he was facing me, he completely avoided eye contact, and his face was red. He pushed his arm out towards me, a black box in his hand. I took it, trying to contain the smile that was trying to force its way onto my face. When I opened the box, a gold necklace with an arrow pendant sat inside. “Daryl…it's…it's beautiful. Thank you!” I pulled it out and handed it to him, turning so my back was to him. “Help me put it on.”

He took the necklace from me, put it around my neck, and fastened the clamp together. He cleared his throat and moved back when I turned around. “This is really sweet of you. You didn't have to get me anything!” I said, standing and going over to him. I wrapped my arms around his waist in a hug. It took him several minutes, but he eventually hugged me back.

#daryldixonfanfiction #the walking dead daryl #daryl dixon #daryl dixon x reader #twd daryl #daryl fanfiction #daryl x reader #daryl dixon fanfiction #twd daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfic #daryl dixion imagine #the walking dead daryl dixon #the walking dead fanfiction #the walking dead x reader #twd family #twd fanfic #twd fanfiction #twd fic #twd x reader

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morbidlyhumorous · 25 days

Text

Save Me Pt. 2 (Bucky Barnes)

TW: Abuse

My hand was tightly gripping Bucky's metal one as we drove. He kept shooting glances in my direction and would squeeze my hand in return every few minutes. And then I saw the house. If I had been holding Bucky's real hand, it would have broken at that moment. He pulled the car into the driveway and parked, but didn't get out. He turned to look at me as he asked, "Are you sure about this?" I nodded my head, my eyes glued to the house before us. He sighs as he brings my hand to his lips and presses a kiss to my knuckles. I meet his gaze as he says, "Please be safe.""I will, I promise."I climb out of the car and walk the path to the front door. I wipe my hands on my jeans and knock on the door, very aware of Bucky's eyes on me. Then the door opens and there stands my dad. When he registers who's standing before him, he smiles and hugs me. I stiffen slightly but he pulls away after a quick second. "Y/n, sweetie, it's so great to see you again. Who's the friend?" I follow his line of sight to Bucky and his car. "Oh, he's a friend. He offered to give me a ride here." I wave at Bucky, the signal that he can leave. He waves back and then reverses out of the driveway and leaves.

My dad opens the door a little wider and ushers me in before closing it behind us. The house looks exactly the same as when I left, minus the kids. My other siblings had all grown up and moved out, but nothing had been touched since. I made myself comfortable on the couch while dad took the seat opposite me. He seemed pretty unchanged, too, just a few more white hairs. "So, how's work? Are you enjoying it?""Yeah, I am enjoying it. There's something new everyday and I have some great colleagues." I say, smoothing my hands on my jeans. Dad quirks his brow at the last part and asks, "Is that guy one of your colleagues?" I nod and he sighs before saying, "Well then no wonder you think your colleagues are great, he looks like a bad person and I know how you're attracted to those people who are bad for you. He didn't even come out to greet me or anything." I take a deep breath as I reply, "He was in a hurry, his mom was expecting him." My dad waved away my excuse and switched the topic, leaving me feeling slightly insulted.

We talked for a little longer before he stood to make dinner, leaving me alone in the living room. I pulled my phone out of my back pocket to see a few texts from Bucky. He was asking if all was okay so far, so I gave him a thumbs up. Eventually, dad said dinner was ready and I joined him at the table. It was a very good meal, but when we had finished, dad asked me to do the dishes. "While you may not live here anymore, you are still currently under my roof and you need to be humbled a bit. Now go clean the dishes." I stared at him, dumbfounded, before I uttered a soft, "Ok," and carried the dishes to the sink. As I washed them, I saw my dad go to the fridge and take out a big beer bottle. I sighed. Another part of him that had not changed.When I finished, I rejoined him in the living room and we sat in an awkward silence for a while. "So, y/n, why has it been 7 years since you've been here?""Oh, y'know, I've been busy with all of my work and extensive traveling that comes with it.""See, that sounds plausible, but I don't think that's why." I felt my mouth go dry at his comment and I asked, "What do you mean?"

He stared me down and took a swig of his beer before replying. "You're avoiding me because you think I'm a bad person. It's all because of that terrible mother of yours. When I was busy working my ass off to support this family, she was turning my own children against me." It was silent for a moment, and in that silence I heard the ghost of his shouting. "I don't think that's what happened at all." He scoffed and took another swig. "Of course she did it, it's in her manipulative nature. She's a real bitch." At those words I felt my face grow hot. "How dare you call my mom that. She was a much better person than you."I pretended to scratch my back but I actually hit the button on my phone that called Bucky. He would need to hear this conversation. My dad became slightly red in the face. "Oh don't even. She manipulated all of you because she victimizes herself. I can't help being a little grumpy after spending all of my time working." "A little grumpy?" I laughed incredulously, "You were abusive. You shouted and hit us and have left us traumatized. You're the one victimizing yourself because you're so narcissistic.""I will not be talked to like this in my own house!" He shouted, his face a brilliant red color now. "I don't live under your roof now, you can't control me," I said as I stood up.

Dad stood up as well and the glass bottle came crashing down over my head. I stumbled a little at the blow and then I felt blood begin to trickle down my face."You fucking bitch," he screamed at me. He slapped me hard across the face and the force behind it brought me to the ground. There were stars before my eyes when I noticed his foot coming towards me. It made contact with my gut and I curled in on myself. He kicked me a few more times, screaming profanities at me. He knelt down next to me and grabbed me by the hair to lift my head, making it feel like it was on fire. "You are an absolute bitch and will never amount to anything, you worthless piece of shit. You're just like your mom." He practically spit out, pulling my hair more and making me cry out.All of a sudden, he let go of my hair and I let my head fall. Through my blurry vision, I saw Bucky holding my dad, beating the shit out of him. He left his unconscious body in the corner before he came for me. He knelt beside me, his face appearing very worried. "Hey, doll, you're gonna be okay, I've got you." He said, but his voice sounded far away. I couldn't get my eyes to focus and breathing was hurting. Bucky picked me up and hurried out of the house, laying me gently in the back of the car before speeding off. During the drive, I passed out.

When I came to, I was laying on a bed in the med bay, Bucky asleep with his head on the edge of the bed and clutching my hand. I moved my thumb lightly over his knuckles and he was instantly awake and alert. "Y/n, how do you feel?""I feel pretty achey and I hurt all over." At my words, he gave me a sad smile before pressing a gentle kiss to my forehead. "My brave girl," he murmured, resting his hand against the side of my face. I relished his touch and nuzzled his hand. "What happened to my dad?" I asked after a moment of silence. "Thanks to your little phone call, coupled with your current state, we had enough evidence to get him locked away for life. He can't hurt you anymore." At Bucky's words, I felt a few relieved tears fall. He saw and he drew me into his arms, rubbing my back comfortingly. "I've got you, doll, and he will never hurt you again." I buried my head in the crook of his neck and felt the weight of being afraid for so long lifted off of me. I kissed Bucky again and he smiled into the kiss, his hand slightly gripping my waist. Neither of us were perfect, but as long as we had each other, we'd be alright. And that's all I needed.I did something new and wrote a pt. 2 for once! If you guys have anyone you wanna see next, let me know and any ideas for a plot if you have one.

#oneshot #bucky barnes #winter soldier #marvel #the avengers

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toads-are-very-polite · 10 days

Text

I am talking with my father. the words he says are heated, and meant to hurt. I am too young for this. Maybe too old. I have been crafted my whole life to be the diplomat, and every personality quiz that glares at me from my computer screen says so.

It's worse when I'm in any class setting, that an instructor looks at one word and thinks only 'peaceful' and 'thoughtful'. they are in many ways less kind, more harsh with what they choose to say when they believe I won't push back.

But they forget- the role of someone who's purpose is to communicate and bring everyone down from heightened feelings is stubbornness. I cannot count the number of times something cruel has been directed at me, only to see the other person's eyebrows raise as they realise I know what I'm talking about when I respond. And I will discuss it in depth. I'm good at making my feelings seem irrelevant in these situations, something that is praised in my argumentative papers. It makes me feel sick. Like I've taken myself and boiled me down until all that is left is the fat skimming the water and that is what I bottle up and sell to people.

Now I am in a situation where this is not acceptable, I am supposed to have feelings. I can't get them out. The tides that swirl within me and threaten to crack my ribcage and seep into my lungs cannot be named. It's like walking into a wall, one that I can see rolling hills thorough a crack in the bricks but is too tall to pass. I break. I am fragmented, I am split into awkward, stuttering pieces.

I can comfort others until the cows come home. But if someone tries to do the same to me I break. I say I have a few close friends, though I'm not sure if this is really true. I have given them information about myself like I think close friends should do. Though as soon as I try to explain what's going on, the waves are back in force. Then I talk too much and it won't stop.

I am a writer, and seeing through the lens of other people is the only way that I can express how I see the world. I wish that it could change. I am trying my best, and I am fighting to see a way that lets me become something more than what people see as only compliant. I've been trying to say this, I've been walking around the Walls of Jericho I built with my own hands and trying to bring them crashing down with a one person band. To be honest, I don't know if it is possible. At least, I know academics seem to cradle me as I try to escape the tight swaddle of not being able to talk.

To me, this and everything else can sort of be explained through autism. But putting a word to it does not mean it doesn't fracture and tear through my skin. It hurts, it hurts so much to not be able to share.

I am talking with my father. I look at his eyes and I understand, he does not have a word for what he feels. He does not know. We are both scared.

#sad rambles again #bleg

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eternalwritess · 27 days

Note

Thank you for doing a matchup trade with me <3 here's the redo of it! you did super well btw but the character made me uncomfortable. here I go!

FANDOM: I would like a hazbin hotel matchup please! and since you said your fine with me choosing a character I would like to be matched with Adam please! I love him sm and I wanna see how the relationship would go : D

Also just @ me in the post when your completed!

Personality+ Notes): I'm a ENTP Ravenclaw, 5w4, Extroverted. I'm a very chill and intelligent person, I'm very polite and sweet! at first awkward, shy and distant when meeting people, extremely independent, when comfortable I talk about a lot of stuff for hours, loud talker, emotions come off as sarcastic or silly (due to autism), confident, straightforward I have a urge to correct someone of faulty information), uses "big" words, good sense of humor, playful, entertaining, optimistic, mischievous, curious(I'm nosy and I love gossip), i can be a rule breaker(sometimes don't mean to), dad/ tharapist friend, when | go out | bring water bottles, first aid kit, chapsticks) just in case, chill but some people would say I have some "repressed anger issues, get a reallyyy overractive Brain, tend to get deep and philosophical when I'm left on my own for to long, I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked. If this helps more the characters I kin a lot are: Victor Nikiforov (Yuri On Ice), Tei (Nameless), Cutthroat (Akudama Drive, Except the Bloodlust cutthroat has.), Ranpo Edogawa (Bungo Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu (Bungo Stray Dogs), Space Ishtar (Fate), Okita Souji (Fate), Langa Hasegawa (Sk8 The Infinity), Sherlock Holmes (TGAA), Zack (Final Fantasy 7), Vash The Stampede (Trigun), Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist), Otonashi Yuzuru (Angel Beats), Karma Akabane (Assassination Classroom), Vanitas (Study Case of Vanitas), Zoe Hange (AOT), Shinoa Hiragi (Seraph of The End) + more

things I love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i love kids even though if they can be annoying i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, I love psychical affection a lot so it's not a problem for me, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if I love someone, they'll be seen.

Looks: Half Polish and Vietnamese and Half Middle Eastern(Iraqi)/Filipino, I'm very skinny like just flat, I have hazel eyes and some slight flecks of amber and blue, I have upturned eyes but they seem like they are almond shaped but they aren't too noticeable, I think I have a heart shaped face but from different angles it looks more diamond shaped(?), I'm approximately 5 8, I have a dimple only on my chin, I have dyed black hair, I also have bangs too, my clothing style tends to stretch widely from comfy to... a lot like this! I wear gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, gyaruo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), scenemo/emo (ofc), & vkei ouji and lolita, I can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as, jirai kei, decora and more so on.

hobbies: gaming, anthropology, pathology, theology, zoology, music, dancing, filmmaking, art (drawing, painting, pottery, digital art, etc), learning different instruments/languages, cosplaying, skateboarding, tabletop RPG's, taking pictures of things that I think are pretty, collecting figurines/stuffed animals and puppetry, science/history, soccer(football)/volleyball/ basketball and swimming, cooking/baking, art is definitely my main hobby I dedicate a lot of time to it, I can play 5 instruments which is the piano, cello, koto and bass/electric guitar, I know 6 languages and I'm learning more right now (which are hindi and chinese if your interested).

Likes: Chocolate, Strawberries, Iced Coffee and Boba Tea, Anime/ Manga, Music, Food, Winning in arguments online or irl, Reading, Cats, Sharks, Animals in general, Cold/or Rainy Weather, Shopping, Playing Tabletop RPG's, Abstract or Romance movies, Kdrama(pretty much any asian dramas), Spicy or Sweet Food, Ramen.

Dislikes: Loud Noises, Slow Walkers and hot weather.

Love Languages: pretty much all of them, LOL (giving). gift giving, words of affirmation & physical touch (receiving)

Thank you so much! I really appreciate letting you letting me send in another matchup <3

✌𝓐𝓭𝓪𝓶✌

ps sorry i made you uncomfy with your last match so dont worry about the whole sending in another matchup thing <3 @averagetoyakinnie

You probably were a new soul in heaven at the gates seeing as you seem like you wouldn't end up in hell.

You probably met in the zoo or at the entrance to it. Why Adam was at the zop is still unknown but he was there. He was probably watching over Emily as she looked at everything

She saw you and introduced you to Adam as a new soul trying to get him to meet some other people

He probably didn't remember your name at first...

"Shit what was it again?"

He was also really rude when you were polite calling you a pushover and leaning on you trying to make you feel small

This didn't work on you no matter how many times he called himself the 'original dick'

After a while of dealing with him you both probably walked around and began talking with each other. He was probably kinda brash and rude the entire time but you never took it from him and he fell in love

You were also still kind to him and he felt kinda bad after a while

Of course he didn't apologize for his behavior but he did regret in come way

"So uh anyways I'm.... NOT sorry. You've just met the Adam YOU should be thankful... heh.."

Yeah he's not great with apologies

When you get into one of your rambles he might end up zoning out but then he'll zone back in and most likely say the most out of pocket shit you've ever heard before

You being straightforward with him is amazing as you're not afraid to correct with some stuff which is great because you humble him every now and then

When you use big words he doesn't understand he'll pause for a moment and call you a nerd

"I don't know what those long ass words exist anyways like just fucking explain it bitch,"

When he's kinda mean to you he doesn't really mean it and thinks of it being funny. Although if you get uncomfortable he'll try and stop... keyword being try

You being curious and a rule breaker is something that he loves and will in fact encourage especially if it 'sticks it to the man'. He'll always stand up for you if you get someone mad and will be curious with you and sometimes do dumb shit in the process

He'll also probably try and pull some pranks with you every now and then on Sera or Peter. but maybe not Emily as you would both get your asses beat, plus she's really nice and you both like her so there's that

He'll also love to gossip with you. Actually he'll probably take you to the exorcists and you'll all just gossip together. That's how you met Lute and to be honest she was probably a lot and he tried keeping you away from her

Didn't really work though

"And thats Lute, also known as danger tits and- LUTE STOP NO-!"

You probably don't get along with her as much as him but you do have some things in common so that helps

You bring water bottles and medical kits for the exorcists when he brings you to watch them train

You quickly became a favorite of theirs as you care more for them than Adam in some aspects. Sometimes you'll even force him to help you carry stuff to them

"Its Jax again! Guys get over here!!!"

Adam is the last person to give a shit about your anger issues. He'll actually encourage you to take them out on someone probably giving you a dummy and telling you to hit it and beat the shit out of it

As for being verbally aggressive he also just doesn't care and will probably join in with you

He doesn't mind you being overprotective but if it gets out of hand he will end up running/flying away from you but then getting you something to make up for it

You preen his wings for him every now and then and he loves it and will run up to you just to get you to do so

"Preen now!!!"

You also helped him out with the whole Eve and Lilith thing helping him get over it

This likely took some time for him to open up to you about it thinking that you might just run off or run away from him still thinking about his exes even if it wasn't in a romantic way more of an 'how did i fuck up that bad' way

But you helped him out and even though it was hard for him to open up (this took like a whole week of talking probably and opening up) he did so and ended up crying on your shoulder afterwards

"Ah shit, sorry about this" *sniffle*

He was likely very embarrassed after the talk and never wanted to bring it up again

He did NOT want you finding out about the exterminations. He knew that you would likely oppose them just from a few conversations with you and he didn't want to lose you

So you can imagine what did happen when you found out about them. Let alone it was he who suggested them

"Listen- man please just listen to me"

This resulted in a long argument between you two that carved a gap in your relationship but he kept begging you to forgive him saying that it was what was best for heaven and that they didn't have another choice

He even brought up Sera saying how important she was and that he never would've done the exterminations if she didn't approve of him going down there

This is where he might've lied saying that he took no pleasure in killing demons in order to keep you happy

He felt really guilty afterwards and bought you all of your favorite things. Rudbulls, pretzels, strawberries, cherry pepsi and chocolate. He even had the exorcists help him out with gifts and figuring out what he should get

"I'm really, really sorry,"

Moving onto the less angsty things with you being observant you probably get him quite a few things too like food, treats, and maybe an album or two from his favorite artists in heaven

He watches anime with you all the time (mostly for the... designs lets be honest) and will probably shout whenever there's some sort of plot twist saying that he 'saw it coming' when he probably didn't lets be honest here

"Oh FUCK yes!! I totally saw that! Did you see that? I saw it"

He also doesn't care at all with you being slightly greedy for money because quite honestly he's the same in some areas but that being said he will bug you for money if he ever runs out... or just doesn't want to spend his

You might have to get used to his music taste and him playing his guitar constantly as he does it every day at the worse times most likely. He tries not to but its almost like a skill at this point

You have to yell at him to stop if it really drives you crazy and he will in exchange for some kisses and cuddles

Speaking of cuddles he'll try and cuddle you daily. If you have down time? Cuddles. Work? Cuddles. Hard day? Cuddles. He'll find any reason to snuggle up with you

That also being said he likes to fold his wings around you in public just because he likes the gesture and he probably wants others to know that you're taken. (Someone hit on you once and he is NOT risking that again)

He notices that you melt when he holds your hand so he'll do it all the time grabbing it for no apparent reason and sometimes even kissing it just to see you get flustered or soften up

"You're so adorable y'know that right?"

One of the reasons he likes it is because he feels somewhat in control or that he's doing something right in his relationship which honestly says a lot since eve and lilith

He loves how hardworking you are and how you help out with the exorcists from time to time making sure that they don't get hurt and such

He'll tell you that you don't need to but you'll do it anyways to help them out

I'd also like to imagine that there are some exorcists like vaggie who have trauma from the exterminations themselves and you would talk to them and help them through it as the year goes on

Adam doesn't see the point in it but he won't question it saying that you can do whatever you want

Since you're 5'8 and shorter than him by quite a pick he'll pick you up bridal style and carry you around sometimes

Or when hugging you he'll squeeze you and pick you up and probably spin you around

"Its sooo good to see you again!"

I'd like to imagine that he also has some attachment issues so when you come back he's almost like a sick puppy waiting for you to come home

He'll wait for you for hours on end just at the door all grumpy until you come on over and give him a hug

He'll also sometimes end training early if he wants to see you

"Alright ladies wrap it up!"

You might get at him for this but he won't listen and will just turn on your favorite anime all the way up with a smug little grin on his face

When he didn't come back from his extermination Lute was the one who told you he was gone before storming off and calling the demons filth and names

You were devastated and wanted to make a grave in heaven for him but Sera declined for the longest time before finally agreeing saying that only those with special access could see it though since the people of heaven might suspect something

His grave ended up being put in a secluded area in a place that you could only visit a few times a week since Sera said that she didn't want anyone getting suspicious of where you were going

Mostly because as the souls in heaven are kind they still are flawed to some extent and might follow you around

You still help the exorcists every now and then but not as much since Lute's in charge now and she hardly lets you through saying that you can't be in there

Overall your relationship has its ups and downs but in the end you two are a very loving couple <3

#hazbin hotel matchups #match up #hazbin hotel matchup #hazbin hotel match up #hazbin hotel match ups #matchup #matchups #hazbin hotel #hazbin

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misssakuramochi · 2 months

Note

Thank you for doing a matchup trade with me <3 here's my matchup!

FANDOM: I would like a ADULT MALE MATCHUP for hazbin hotel please, the characters i don't want is like adam/valentino but I also don't wanna be matched with angel dust or husk (I have no problem with them at all but I don't see myself being romantic partners with them)

ABOUT ME: My name is Jaxrel! People call me "Jax" for short. also I use other names like Himawari, Rin, etc, He/Him (They/Them is acceptable), I'm a Trans Man who's pansexual and I've been diagnosed with mental illness and disorders that I do not wish sharing ATM.

Personality(+ Notes): I'm a ENTP Ravenclaw, 5w4, Extroverted. I'm a very chill and intelligent person I'm very polite and sweet! at first awkward, shy and distant when meeting people, extremely independent, when comfortable I talk about a lot of stuff for hours, loud talker, emotions come off as sarcastic or silly (due to autism), confident, straightforward (I have a urge to correct someone of faulty information), uses "big" words, good sense of humor, playful, entertaining, optimistic, mischievous, curious(l'm nosy and I love gossip), i can be a rule breaker(sometimes don't mean to), dad/ tharapist friend, when | go out | bring water bottles, first aid kit, chapsticks) just in case, chill but some people would say I have some "repressed anger issues, get a reallyyy overractive Brain, tend to get deep and philosophical when I'm left on my own for to long, I can be verbally aggressive when prevoked. If this helps more the characters I kin a lot are: Victor Nikiforov (Yuri On Ice), Tei (Nameless), Cutthroat (Akudama Drive, Except the Bloodlust cutthroat has.), Ranpo Edogawa (Bungo Stray Dogs), Dazai Osamu (Bungo Stray Dogs), Space Ishtar (Fate), Okita Souji (Fate), Langa Hasegawa (Sk8 The Infinity), Sherlock Holmes (TGAA), Zack (Final Fantasy 7), Vash The Stampede (Trigun), Roy Mustang (Fullmetal Alchemist), Otonashi Yuzuru (Angel Beats), Karma Akabane (Assassination Classroom), Vanitas (Study Case of Vanitas), Zoe Hange (AOT), Shinoa Hiragi (Seraph of The End) + more

things love about myself: when someone is going through anything or needs help with anything they will call me before anyone else, i have an ugly laugh so guaranteed if i laugh someone else will as well, how much i love animals if i see a stray around my house i will adopt it immediately, if i see a stranger crying in public my eyes will not leave them alone until i get the courage to walk up to them and ask whats wrong, i am very confrontational i will always stand up for whats right no matter how scary the situation may be, how greedy i am for money but when i love someone i will spend the world on them, how excited i get for little things like when someone buys me redbull, monster, cherry pepsi or chocolate pretzels/strawberries my day cant be ruined, how in touch i am with being grateful if someone helps me in anyway or does something in general to benefit me i will never forget it, dont take people for granted, ive been told anytime someone hangs out with me that being with me feels safe and peaceful, pay attention to the little things, how even though i dont care about plushies i have been given some and i make sure to kiss them all goodnight in case they are actually real and see what happens, if i know someone is having a hard mental health day i will clean for them/ get them icecream and be patient till they are ready to talk about it, without fail a quiet person will always be loud with me, i am the type of person who just wants people i love to be happy even if its not with me, i will always choose them i dont say i love you until i mean it i will celebrate the people i love, i am very observant if i see that someone wants something i will get it for them no matter what, i will make it my mission to compliment a stranger that looks like they are having a hard time so their day is a little better, how i say i love kids even though if they can be annoying i will protect them with my life and im so gentle with them, I am not ashamed of what i love like anime for example even though when I was teased for it when I was little i never once hid that i loved it even if i dont like a song that someone shows me i will be hyper while listening to it so they dont feel small and embarrassed around me, how soft i become when someone holds my hand, I love psychical affection a lot so it's not a problem for me, i love how hardworking i am, whether its how much i love actually working or just getting out of bed knowing how hard my mind is fighting i love how i have gotten up everyday despite how challenging it is to, i am an emotional person but i will always cry for a sad scene in a movie, if i love someone, they'll be seen.

Looks: Half Polish and Vietnamese and Half Middle Eastern(Iraqi)/Filipino, I'm very skinny like just flat, I have hazel eyes and some slight flecks of amber and blue, I have upturned eyes but they seem like they are almond shaped but they aren't too noticeable, I think I have a heart shaped face but from different angles it looks more diamond shaped(?), I'm approximately 5'8, I have a dimple only on my chin, I have dyed black hair, I also have bangs too, my clothing style tends to stretch widely from comfy to... a lot like this! I wear gyaru (hime gal, himekaji, agejo, gyaruo, rokku, manba, banba, kogal, tsuyome, and kigurumi), goth (trad goth, romantic goth, mall goth, cyber goth, and victorian goth), scenemo/emo (ofc), & vkei ouji and lolita, I can also pull off a kpop idol look, i also wear a lot of cool dresses and suits, I also wear Y2K and I also dress in alternative clothing a LOT, I wear a lot of other harajuku styles such as, jirai kei, decora and more so on.

Likes: Chocolate, Strawberries, Iced Coffee and Boba Tea, Anime/ Manga, Music, Food, Winning in arguments online or irl, Reading, Cats, Sharks, Animals in general, Cold/or Rainy Weather, Shopping, Playing Tabletop RPG's, Abstract or Romance movies, Kdrama(pretty much any asian dramas), Spicy or Sweet Food, Ramen.

Dislikes: Loud Noises, Slow Walkers, People who don't know when to close their mouths when chewing and hot weather.

Love Languages: physical touch, acts of service & words of affirmation(pretty much all the love languages.) (giving). gift giving, words of affirmation & physical touch (receiving)

Thank you so much! Have a good day!

I match you with...

LUCIFER

○ Lucifer sees right through your shy, walled off exterior. He's the king of hell - he knows a sinner when he sees one, and he sees more kindness in you. It's easy for him to tell that you're a big softie underneath. He approves of you at first, but when he really finds his heart melting for you is when he sees your kindness in action, even towards those who he doesn't think deserve it. From that moment you're stuck in his head. Someone so well-intentioned is rare and he can't stop thinking about it - about you.

○ Being more extroverted, Lucifer doesn't have to worry quite as much about making you uncomfortable with grand gestures-- which is perfect, because grandeur is kind of his thing. He also doesn't have to be as worried about the crowds when he takes you out and doesn't feel like being disguised. He loves surprising you with cute acts, big and small, no matter where you are knowing that it won't overwhelm you.

○ Both extremely intelligent and varied in interests, you guys never run out of things to talk about. You've got a lot of hobbies, and so does Lucifer. Between the two of you you each take on many of the other's interests, or at the very least you love learning more about the other's interests. Being independent, you love being able to spend the day on your passions and come back to a lovingly listening Lucifer over dinner.

○ Umabashed and confidently yourself, you're following the exact pattern Lucifer had hoped for humans. Lucifer loves that you love yourself as much as he does, and he's you're number 2 supporter - next to yourself! However, in moments when confidence wavers and doubt creeps in, he's always there to remind you who you are.

HEADCANONS:

○ Lucifer is very protective over you. Your good natured desire to help those in need and comfort the damaged is what he loves most about you, but in hell it can get you into quite a deal of trouble. He's constantly nervous when you go out alone, and will make bodyguard contraptions as a compromise to keep you safe when you want to go out by yourself. Yes, they do have ducks for heads.

○ Lucifer is used to people doing things for him more or less because they have to. He is the king of hell, after all. So when you come along and give him a heartfelt gift, or cook him a meal despite having imps for that, his heart melts. Every effort is met tenfold by him - he loves to spoil you.

○ Did you say romance movies? Lucifer got out of them for awhile, but deep down he's a huge fan of the genre - and you ignite his love of it again. You both take turns on a weekly movie night picking a romance of your choice. Lucifer cries a little at every one tbh.

○ You do home concerts together! It's only ever for the two of you, playing wholeheartedly for one another on your favourite instruments. Lucifer is an avid fiddler, and will play in compliment to you. Writing songs together about one another is something you both hold dear.

#matchups #headcanon #hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar

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