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adore-laur · 5 months

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FRUITCAKE

— a new year’s addition to southpaw 🎆

——

The sparkler in Sawyer's hand burns out with a lackluster fizzle, just like the end of another year. Staring at the Orlando skyline, everyone, including the twinkling stars above, is out celebrating tonight. Free spirits roam the streets across the centerpiece lake with liquor-infused veins and festive accessories decorating their faces. Straight ahead, each apartment complex window is lit with strobe lights in various colors and a mixture of music booming in each square.

From where Sawyer stands on an unfamiliar balcony, she is just a spectator on the sidelines. She isn't that much of a social butterfly. Parties of any kind are where her fragile wings curl inward, shy and shielding her from a potentially awkward state of affairs. Dressing up is the only reason she agreed to attend the New Year's Eve celebration at some high school acquaintance's studio apartment. Harry, too, she supposes. He's her date tonight. However, mingling comes much easier to him, so he's probably inside having more fun than she is.

His wrist has just about healed, thanks to the time he's been dedicating to physical therapy. Sawyer has been by his side every day, taking care of him and loving the new way they can be around each other since that stormy night outside 7/11 four months ago. It's been challenging keeping up with his bustling life as a professional baseball player and trying to balance her job with how often he travels, but it all proves to be worth it when she feels giddiness course through her veins whenever she's near him.

Harry is the sole reason why Sawyer looks forward to waking up in the morning. The rays of light that shimmer through her bedroom curtains are nothing compared to when she sees the smile on his face, topped with two dimples that make a home for the sun. A sleepy smile when he picks her up and drives her to work bright and early, always with two McDonald's hash browns and a large orange juice to share in his cup holder. A childlike smile when he holds her hand while strolling through the city, swinging their arms as he points at different houses he would like to live in. Her favorite is a radiant smile when she visits him at practice, and he spots her sitting in the scout seats. He always jogs over to her in his dirt-stained uniform and leans past the barrier to kiss her hello, leaving her with a lingering taste of Bazooka bubblegum. She really likes it when he kisses her.

To put it in celestially simple terms, she's over the moon in love with her sunray.

As the party inside rages on, Sawyer sighs between her chattering teeth. Orlando gets nippy at night, and all she wants to do is fall asleep under a nice, warm blanket. Or against Harry's chest. It's hard as a rock, but she doesn't mind since his hands and lips make up for it.

"Southpaw's not out here with you? Bummer."

The hauntingly familiar voice makes Sawyer jolt out of her lovesick trance, a sudden feeling of unease twisting her stomach into a knot. It belongs to her ex-boyfriend, the one who decided to cheat on her behind her back. She had seen him walk in with his buddies and managed to ignore him... until now.

"Leave me alone, Jordan," she calls out monotonously without turning around to see his smug face.

"You got all dolled up, and your boyfriend isn't even paying attention to you," he says mockingly, his voice and footsteps getting closer.

"Go away."

"Are you two a thing now?" he presses like an interrogator.

Ugh! The audacity to ask such a thing! Sawyer turns to face him and brazenly replies, "That's totally none of your business."

Jordan removes his tattered trucker hat, ruffles his hair, and then puts it back on. "I think it is my business, considering you basically left me for him. You moved on fast."

She laughs to herself. "You're so delusional. Take the hint."

"Whatever," he says dismissively. His dilated eyes grossly run up and down her body. "You dress sluttier now."

Sawyer feels like she just got punched in the gut. It's one thing to hear him insinuate that she changed herself now that she's dating Harry, but it's another thing entirely to be degraded by someone she used to have idle respect for. An unsettling fusion of frustration and embarrassment seeps into the open wounds of her wings. Nevertheless, she puts on a brave face.

"Don't make me get Harry," she says with the most threatening tone she can muster up, "otherwise you'll be leaving here with a black eye."

"All right, all right." Jordan backs away, holding both hands high in surrender like a wimp. "Just don't get your dainty little heart broken."

"Screw you."

He doesn't reply and just gives her one last taunting look before sliding the squeaky patio door open to head back inside. Sawyer crosses her arms defensively and swallows down the burning lump in her throat. She's miserably cold, so she begins to cry. Not a sob, but a puny noise that gets stuck on the way out of her mouth and causes tears to fall past her bottom lashes. She knows wholeheartedly that she shouldn't let Jordan get under her skin. The flippant remarks he spewed are irrelevant and don't deserve to make her sensitive side come out of hiding. His words still hurt, though. Her confidence when she arrived has been completely demolished because of a stupid boy she once knew.

After ten minutes, the patio door opens again, and Sawyer hastily wipes away her tears with the back of her hand. Maybe she should just go back inside and find something to distract her; maybe join in on a lousy game of beer pong in the kitchen or find the television so she can watch Boyz II Men perform on Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve.

Looking up, she sees Harry standing in all his exuberant glory, wearing a cozy brown sweater and his trusty corduroy cap. He's also holding a plate with fruitcake on it. She doesn't have the energy nor interest to ask where he got it and why he has it.

"There's my girlfriend," he says happily, one hand casually perched on the doorframe. "You and me, let's go. They have Heart queued up for karaoke; we're doing "Alone.""

Sawyer wraps her arms around her shivering body. "I don't wanna sing right now," she says, trying to mask the glumness in her voice.

"Why not?" he asks as he walks toward her. "It's our song. Or we could get crazy and do "Barracuda." Or I could ask for "Suddenly, Seymour," if that's more your speed."

"No thanks."

"C'mon," Harry begs, setting the plate on a nearby table and embracing her in his strong arms. He tilts his cap up to smack a few warm kisses on her cheek, then murmurs, "I need you for the harmonies."

"You can do all the parts." He's a decent singer, surprisingly. "I believe in you."

He huffs and starts playing with her fingers, twisting her rings and rubbing his thumb over her glittery nail polish. "Please?"

In her pretty dress and tiara, Sawyer tilts her head and looks at him with big brown eyes that never fail to weaken him. She knows what she's doing—she's been doing it to him for years.

Harry immediately shields his face and says, "Don't give me those eyes."

"Give you what eyes?" she asks innocently.

"Sawyer Alejandra," he says as a warning.

She stomps her foot and cranes her neck back. "Do not use my middle name."

Smirking, he cradles the back of her head to tilt it forward again. "You stomping your foot only makes me want to kiss you. Stop being stubborn and tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing. I just want to go home."

"It's not even midnight yet. Did something happen?"

"No..."

"It's endearing how bad of a liar you are." His inquisitive gaze travels around her face, stopping at the slight wetness visible under her eyes. "Hey," he says softly. "Have you been crying? Why are we crying, baby?"

Sawyer sniffles and stares at the ground. "Is my outfit too much?"

The crème satin dress with a pleated bust outlined in gold flows elegantly down her body just the way she likes it. The tiara on her head arches with glimmering silver beads, an accessory she was so excited to wear. In the full-length mirror at her house, it seemed like the perfect outfit. Now, she's second-guessing it all because of Jordan's imprudent comment.

"Why? You look like an angel," Harry says while drying her leftover sadness with the sleeve of his sweater. "I almost didn't let us walk out the door, remember? We were kissing until we got dizzy."

She quirks her lips to the side and chews on the inside of her cheek. After a moment of insecure contemplation, she quietly asks, "Am I too much?"

He smooths out her eyebrows, his own becoming furrowed. The warmth and gentle caress of his calloused fingertips give her a sense of safety. "What brainless birdie is pecking nonsense into my girlfriend's head?"

"Jordan," she says with a wince. "Um, he came out here and tried to talk to me."

Sawyer braces for impact since his name has always been a touchy subject around Harry. She still remembers the time she told him the news about Jordan cheating. It was almost scary the way he was so willing to throw a screwball at him with a broken wrist. He might have been joking, but she fears he would have done something marginally worse if she hadn't persuaded him to leave it be. Karma probably unleashed her wrath anyway.

"What did he say to you," Harry says, jerking his chin up. It's not a question; it's a demand.

There's no way he's going to let her wriggle her way out of this one, so she truthfully relays, "He told me I dressed sluttier now."

Another brace for impact. Sawyer racks her mind for ways to restrain him if he moves to go find him. Judging by the size of her arms compared to his, she highly doubts she'd succeed.

"Which way did he go?" he asks in a calmer tone. His hand moves to her hip and flexes, almost as comfort for her and a way to suppress anger for himself.

"Please don't cause a scene," she says hurriedly. "The year doesn't need to end in a fist fight. Or another wrist injury."

Harry doesn't listen and glances behind his shoulder. "Do you want me to get him, or do you want to?" he asks through a tightened jaw.

"I think doing neither is the smartest choice."

Looking back at her in bewilderment, he says, "That dumbass made you cry, Sawyer."

"I cry all the time!"

"Yeah, over puppies," he stresses with flailing hand gestures, "and The Golden Girls. This is something serious that clearly made you upset!"

Sawyer scoffs. "Excuse me, The Golden Girls is very serious."

"That's wonderful, babe, but you need to listen to me." He points at himself. "I'm pissed, so what I'm gonna do is go get Jordan and have a civil conversation with him, 'kay?"

"Can I try my very hardest to convince you otherwise?"

Harry starts backing away, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "If you use those eyes on me again, we're going straight home, and you'll be in big trouble."

"I would actually love to go home right now."

He pokes his Shirley Temple-stained tongue out on his way to the door. Just as he's about to turn around, he stops and begins walking forward. He reaches behind his neck to remove his knitted sweater, then gently tosses it to her. "I thought I told you to bring a coat, Sawyer," he says before retreating inside.

The graphic tee she gets a glimpse of fits him well — a little too well — and the thin silver necklace he wears briefly catches in the light, the 'S' pendant he's had for years. He always teases her and says he got it because his last name is Styles. Sawyer smiles at the thought and absentmindedly toys with the 'H' pendant around her neck. She then puts on his sweater and lets his leftover warmth engulf her. It smells like his house, his cologne, his sheets--just him. It consumes her in an overwhelmingly beautiful way.

Harry is gone for no longer than a minute when he comes out again, this time with Jordan trailing behind him like a dog with its tail between its legs. He guides her to a chair and pulls her down on his lap, taking his cap off and sticking it in his pocket like always. Some curls fall over his forehead, and it makes her heart squeeze.

With one tattooed arm winding around her waist and the other holding his ankle propped on his thigh, Harry starts the conversation with a casual, "Long time no see, Jordan."

"Styles." His eyes narrow and shift over. "Sawyer."

"I heard you two already had a chat out here."

He uncomfortably readjusts his footing. "Yeah, we bumped into each other."

"Oh, did you?" Harry asks sarcastically. "You know, you're digging yourself a deeper hole by lying."

"I'm not lying," Jordan replies with too much confidence.

Harry laughs in amusement. "That's funny." Sitting up a bit, he tightens his hold on Sawyer. "I suggest you tell the truth and tell me exactly what you said to her."

"Dude, it's not that big of a deal."

"It is when my girlfriend is involved."

Jordan scoffs and looks around incredulously. "Well, maybe if you were out here with her instead of ignoring—"

"You fuckin' cheated on her, mate, don't tell me—"

"Stop it!" Sawyer blurts, stressfully swiping a hand over her forehead. "Both of you, just stop."

Harry takes a deep breath and cracks his neck. "I want you to apologize," he continues more calmly, "and if you're not willing to do that, then I'd be more than happy to have a little chat with you myself."

Jordan's hesitant body language speaks for itself. He knows not to mess with him. "I'm sorry, okay?"

"Sorry for what?" Harry asks.

"For saying—"

"Speak to her, not me."

Jordan grinds his teeth, making awkward eye contact with Sawyer. "I'm sorry I said that you dressed sluttier now. You... look great. You look happy."

"Thanks," Sawyer mutters while picking at her chipped nail polish.

"See?" Harry says, flipping his palms up. "That's all we needed."

"Can I go now?"

"Sure thing, bud. One last thing: I never want to see your face again or hear that you've been talking to my girlfriend, got it?"

"Jeez, chill out. Happy fucking New Year."

With that, he removes himself from the interaction with a drunken peace sign. The thick tension in the air disperses, and Sawyer releases the breath she'd been holding while curling into Harry's chest.

"Boys are so exhausting."

Harry hums, lightly scratching her back. "You're not wrong."

"Not you, though." She kisses his jaw and then scans the balcony. "Hey, is there a reason why you brought an entire fruitcake out here?"

"Oh, it's— I, uh," he stammers, his shoulders slumping. "I forget."

Sawyer cradles his cheeks and giggles fondly. "You make me laugh, sunray."

His skin grows warmly rubescent under her touch. "I burn brighter when I'm around you. How could I not when I get to hear that laugh?"

She plummets deeper in love, a straight drop into daylong devotion. "My sunray."

"Forever." Harry goes off into his own world for a bit. After studying his surroundings, his face suddenly lights up like he mentally stumbled upon some profound epiphany. "Wait, listen to this. You asked me if you're too much, yeah?" He nods to where the dessert he brought out sits. "You're like that fruitcake. On the outside, people who don't know you assume things about your character, like how people judge fruitcake by its appearance. They say it doesn't look tempting before they even try it. But on the inside" — he gently pokes where her heart is — "there are all these delightful little fruits that make up who you are. They take people by surprise."

Sawyer hides her face in his neck. "That was a really stupid analogy."

"You were so about to smile," Harry says, giving her a playful noogie. "I can tell."

She slaps his hand away. "Ow! I was not."

"Were too."

A sudden boom interrupts their harmless bickering as fireworks begin shooting off in the sky, making Harry instinctively pull Sawyer closer due to the startling noise. They both turn their attention past the balcony railing and admire the colorful, celebratory explosions. They burst and crepitate amongst the stars, grandly signifying the start of a new year. She was so enamored by Harry that she didn't even hear the partygoers chanting the countdown inside.

"It's 1992," Harry says in her ear. Over the thunderous noise, his voice sounds like a deep rumble, but it's still comprehensible to her since she's tuned into him constantly.

Sawyer turns her head to find him already staring at her. She smiles. "Happy New Year."

"Our first year as a couple," he says as he fixes her crooked tiara.

Shyly averting her gaze, she whispers, "Yeah, it is." It's probably impossible to hear.

"Can I kiss you?"

"You don't have to ask, Harry."

"I know." The fireworks look mesmerizing in the reflection of his pupils. "It's just that you get so nervous. I want to make sure you're comfortable since our dynamic has changed."

Sawyer passes a hand over his stomach and hooks her pointer finger in one of his belt loops. "I'm always comfortable around you. Besides, nothing has changed too much, has it?"

"No, I suppose not." He smirks and glances at her lips. “Except we kiss now, which is super cool."

She scrunches her nose. "You're silly."

"In all seriousness," he says with a squeeze to her hip, "take however long you need to warm up to this whole thing. I can be patient for you."

"I'll get there."

"I know. I know you will. We're dating now, but that doesn't stop you from still being my best friend."

Sawyer rests her forehead against his. "I love you," she mouths over the sounds of revelry in the sky.

"In what way?" Harry mouths back.

Beaming, she speaks up loud and clear. "In a way that makes me want to kiss you all the time."

His eyes close for a second before he replies, "You can't say things like that. Shit, you're making my heart go crazy right now."

She places her palm on his thumping heartbeat. "Then kiss me, summerboy."

"Mm. Once I start, I won't be able to stop."

"That's fine by me."

Harry nudges his nose with hers before diving in, capturing her lips with a slight clashing of teeth. Deep and slow, he lets each one linger while guiding her face with one hand. He's a face-grabber when he kisses, and it makes her entire body shudder. She can taste the maraschino cherries he always eats first before sipping his virgin cocktail. Sour and a little bit sweet, something she can never get enough of.

He eventually pulls away with a soft pop. Over the past few months, he's gotten quite acquainted with Sawyer's mouth by kissing her like he's making up for every time he wanted to but couldn't. "I love you so much." Kiss. "And I'm obsessed with you." Kiss. "And I could look at you forever."

Sawyer gets her own kisses in, three smacks in a row that make him hum blissfully during each one. "You'd get bored of my face," she replies breathlessly.

"I would absolutely not." He twirls a strand of her golden hair and stares at her attentively. "Your eyes are such a dark brown, but they still light up when you smile or laugh. I fuckin' love it when they do that. You're my brown-eyed honey angel."

"Do not start complimenting me."

"God, and when I first met you on the beach" — Harry looks off into the distance and shakes his head slowly — "I thought you were so pretty. Like, it blew my mind how someone could be that pretty."

Sawyer presses her fingers against his swollen lips. "Literally shut up, Harry."

"Then I heard your voice, sweet and soft like a songbird." He's giggling through his words now, but they still come out with complete sincerity. "My heart made room for yours right then and there. I was a goner."

She blushes profusely. "Stop it, or I'll push you off this balcony."

"Then you almost gave me a concussion, but I feel like that was fate. You made me dizzy then, and you make me dizzy now."

"Enough!"

"I'm going to love you for a lifetime, Sawyer," Harry confesses candidly. “I hope you know that. You could push me off this balcony, and I'd still follow you to the end of the earth."

"That's oddly romantic, but let's love each other through 1992 first," she tells him, patting his dimpled cheek. "Okay?"

"Whatever you want, fruitcake."

She laughs and shoves his firm chest. "Your nicknames for me suck!"

He steals another kiss, smiling into it. "See what I mean? That laugh lights me up. And hey, fruitcake is a better nickname than shortstop, right?"

"I guess," Sawyer mutters, "but I… I really like it when you call me baby." The last portion is whispered quickly and sheepishly, yet the gleam in her boyfriend's eyes tells her he heard it all.

"Yeah, baby?" Harry murmurs with a satisfied groan as he readjusts her in his lap. “You gotta stop saying things like that. It's got me going weak in the knees." Sawyer bites her lip, causing him to lull his head to the side and clutch where his heart is. “God, everything you do makes me want to kiss you for hours."

So they do. Not for hours, but long enough for the fireworks to fade out and the party inside to die down with remnants of confetti and glitter on the ground. Under the stars, they kiss until they become dizzy with love and secret exchanges of words they have yearned to say to each other for so long. Just the two of them on a random balcony, falling deeper and deeper in love with each other until it's time to go home.

They shine too brightly to be dimmed.

——

#harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #harry styles fluff #harry styles au #harry styles x oc #harry styles #adore-laur #southpaw #fruitcake

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forestshadow-wolf · 2 months

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Invading your ask box to spare our mooties from having to scroll through 200 reblogs lol.

Alright so here we go, we have:

Floris 'Flower' Van Steege: My first true OC and my favorite boy <3, he's the medic for the 141 and because he is extremely self indulgent i ship him with König because big gremlin man hot. (I think i even have a biography post about him buried in my posts but please tell me if you want to know more i am totally not feral.)

Timber: A lone injured mercenary that the 141 encountered while on a mission and dragged back to base growling and trying to bite them. He calmed down after getting treated and joined the 141 off the books. Basically a discount Ghost, only a bit more tamed and follows Gaz around like a loyal dog instead of Soap.

James : A captain of another task force, totally didn't have a fling with Price in the past and totally doesn't flirt with Price every time the task forces work together, according to Price (liar)

Antonio: James' favorite sergeant, the littlest brother of everyone, baby, can do no wrong (except for the time he murdered his abusive father but he deserved it.)

Abel 'Lion' (or Mama Lion behind his back): The Shadow Company's second in command and resident mother. Please help him he is so tired. The only one able to make Graves sit his ass down and listen, couldn't go on the mission to Las Almas due to an injury which is why Graves went off the rails, gave him the scolding of a lifetime after Graves came back.

Clyde 'Cowboy': Basically Graves if Graves was 50% sluttier and 80% more relaxed. Rumoured to be Graves' illegitimate son.

Simone Van Steege: Floris and König's eldest daughter, when she's like 25 she forms a team called 'De Witte Wieven' with her two younger sisters.

Tamsin Anastasia MacTavish: Soap and Ghost's eldest daughter, looks a lot like Tommy.

Elise Alexandra MacTavish: Soap and Ghost's second daughter, has Soap's hair but Ghost's eyes, taller than her sister and lords it over her at every opportunity.

Briar Cameron MacTavish: Soap and Ghost's third child, has Soap hair colour and Ghost's curls (yes Ghost has curls fight me), though their eyes are green, which are inherited from Ghost's mother.

Alright, i think this is all of them, damn this took long i need to organise my files (and then i proceed to do nothing about it)

Flower's real one for having the hots for Konig

Timber sounds like a feral cat you'd pick up out of a dumpster

Mmmm yes price and james definitely don't have a thing between them... 😏

Antonio..... he's just a little guy, he wouldn't do that... *definitely did a thing he did but also no he didn't*

Lion's got his hands full... but also i need him to give me a hug. Also the fact that he's most of graves' impulse control is 🤌

Cowboy as a slutty graves? Sign me the fuck up 👀

Simone definitely kick ass

And Tamsin, Elise, and Brair probably give their parents SO MANY grey hairs

#cod oc #others ocs #ocs #cod mw2 #cod #call of duty #ghostsoap #soapghost #lovely ask #moot asks #el rambles

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thisbetternotawakenanything · 2 years

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Teaser trailer fuck yeah let’s look at costumes!

Everybody’s favourite reprehensible people show is ready to tease us, let’s see what we can glean from the attire, shall we? The resolution is Twitter shitty, and I’ve pumped up the chroma so we can see colour themes on the blurry pile of screen caps, but let’s go anyway!

First: Team Logan. He’s still in the blue and blue squares we’ve come to recognise as being his attire of loyalty signalling. Hope you choke on your cheesecake, Logan! The Egg and the Egg Sucker got dressed together over FaceTime. Note the entire room of core yes men and women cloaked in blue, and Gerri is wearing PANTS, which is such a radical departure for her I worry for her mental health. But she’s also rocking a punk for her triple ear piercing (J Smith Cameron’s IRL ear piercing, will it disappear before it airs?), and I’ve decided to imagine Roman talked her into that at some point. Kerry in a blue suit version of her Italy pink suit says, “Who’s got the supermax pussy grip now, Marcia? I’m bringing Business Pussy. His favourite.” I am vomiting up my lunch. That purple circle is possibly Laird! Bring back Laird! Logan also addresses his blue and grey company drones, with a beige assist from Cyd Peach.

Now let’s deal with Team Progeny:

ALERT! Roman’s wearing his Probably Fucked Gerri In An Alternate Universe YACHT SHIRT. But also a little piece of flair on his right wrist. What does it mean Miley Screaming dot gif?! I wish I could see his pants. Roman’s always been blue too, but the fact he’s holding on to his blue status despite being booted from the Waystar nest? He’s still bootleg Logan, and still connected in his heart and mind. Gerri in blue, Roman in blue. Can you feel the YEARNING? Connor in blue, no surprises there. Shiv still dragging her beige behind her from season 3, only she’s added some Kendall signature brown to indicate her emotional landscape is fucked. Kendall is still skulking in Earth tones, pretending he’s in touch with planet earth. They’re in LA and Shiv is happy about it. That pink room in (presumably) some LA house! That pink (NY)karaoke bar! Just when you thought Roman’s undershirts couldn’t get sluttier than Italy, somebody put this one on a really hot wash and now it’s so tight we have no choice but to jerk off suffer. Is he feeling constricted, or sexy? Why not both? Undershirt plus business pants including belt is basically Roman’s pyjamas, so his moody hot beverage on a balcony enjoyment tracks with that. Roman, you’d better be on the phone to Gerri (10-20% chance he is) and I’d love it if that bracelet was somehow meaningful in a wanting Gerri to love you way, but I’m not holding my breath. But your long distance couples costuming has been noted!

Bets on which song Connor makes them sing at karaoke? And how much peer pressure will it take to make Roman join in? If it’s We Are The Champions I will catapult myself into the sun. I have a feeling Gerri might be living some season 1 plot deja vu.

Bonus: Excited for Norway!

#gerri x roman #succession hbo #succession #costume design #gerri kellman #roman roy #succession spoilers #shiv roy #tom wambsgans #connor roy #kendall roy #tom x greg #please let them touch

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arcplaysgames · 1 year

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I have a feeling I am gonna enjoy this third semester more than any other part of the game, I'm not even joking.

Reverie Vantas spends the next week as the perfect psychopomp's apprentice, visiting every wayward soul he knows and whispering the same fucking thing to each one.

I'll be waiting for you.

This is beautiful and horrific, it really is. A trusted friend who has the key to your heart coming to you when you are happy and at peace and telling you that it's a lie wrapped around you and handing you a knife before walking away.

This sequence fucks severely, it's agonizing and brutal. Shiho never tried to kill herself so she's transferring back to Shujin, Ryuji has a college scholarship because his work on the track team, Makoto and Sae are celebrating their father's promotion.

The ones that fucked me up the most were:

Instead of being a chauvinist who intends to sell off his daughter to a probable rapist, Haru's father is now a doting man who respects her opinions and wants to know when she falls in love.

Yusuke's mother's painting is being displayed in museums, appropriately credited to her, and Madarame is taking care of Yusuke and fostering his talent as an artist, and he's not living hand to mouth anymore.

and Sojiro has a new, even sluttier outfit, good for him!

No but Futaba is absolutely the closest to knowing what is up. She flashbacks to her proclamation from her awakening,

And unlike others, her awakening was explicitly about cutting through the falsehoods. When Reverie comes to see her like a grey-toned grim reaper, she runs off, away from him.

Because yeah Reverie is a reaper, a psychopomp, he is here to take people away from this soft gaussian blurred world. He will kill Wakaba again in the name of truth, and he is a frightening presence.

This shit is horrific, it's fabulous.

Akechi calls at the end of the week with some details on what he's found.

One: Maruki has been working on this cognitive psience thing since college and it was far enough along he almost got to break ground on a research lab to explore treatment. Then Something Happened and the support dried up.

My assumption: It has to do with Rumi. Maybe he tried his psience treatment on her and it went badly enough that it scared off investors. Maruki himself said that she was alive and well though. Was he lying?

Two: What The Fuck somehow Wakaba and Okumura are alive. They aren't just visages created in the shape of these people, they are real living beings.

And that.

Immediately tilts the ethics of this whole thing on its head. Fuck.

Three: Everyone has been rewritten to fit the situation. Madarame really is a kind sensei, Okumura is a good father. Only Shido was arrested, taking the fall for the entire conspiracy.

So the original ethical quandry of the game has returned with fucking knives. If you interfere with a bad person to make them into a good person, if you commit an ego death on them, is that not the same as murder?

And lemme tell you we are gonna get INTO THAT very soon 'caaaaause I did a bad thing. 8)

Akechi you are such a bitch when you are mask off, thank you. I am honored. Do you want to kiss under the light of a full moon?

He's right, though. Everyone always seems a little surprised to see Reverie. He doesn't fit in this reality and is like an actor constantly missing his cue. It's jarring and terrible.

While Reverie and Akechi are out, the crew comes together to talk about the feeling of Wrongness that he has visited onto all of them. They're all discussing it, when.

The world cracks and Morgana is a cat again. Oh shit.

If the illusion is that fragile.... that's a problem for Maruki.

A beautiful Lotus Tree with flowers for all.

I do have a lot of respect for how Maruki is going about this. I'm someone who loves a Lawful Evil motherfucker, trust me. Maruki has already considered how this will sound to the people around him and basically is like "okay, fine."

Like, does he get pleasure from being the person to save the world? Yep, he admits that. And he says that shouldn't stand in the way of the happiness of the entire population.

Fair fucking dues, Maruki. However, I think it's telling that his Palace is centered around his ego. I do deeply genuinely believe what he's saying so far. I do actually think he is doing this for the right reasons, to help people, to save them from pain.

But his Palace is filled with sycophants who speak of him like a savior, and the auditorium is filled with blank faces to support him. So.

you know what, Maruki, your softboy meets fuckman vibes had won my heart

DOOOOOOOOOO THE BAAAAAD THIIIIIIIIIING

#p5 #persona liveblog

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digitaldiscipline · 22 days

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Not sure that dreamshit was worth the wait, but almost.

Last night was a doozy, even by my standards, but tossing and turning for hours first, even with the help of some melatonin and chamomile gummies, was deeply unneccessary.

We begin with me walking back towards my house from the vicinity of my high school in the company of one of my coworkers, who answered my sensible but pointed questions about why she parked a mile and a half away by pointing out it was how she was able to walk a lot more for health reasons. I point out that there's no reason she should give me a ride once we get to her car, since we'll be two blocks from my place, and we decide to duck into a little shops-and-restaurants plaza that doesn't exist in reality so she can pick up some stuff she ordered, and then go to the Mediterranean restaurant next door for some dinner, and that's where shit got unreal.

The restaurant was of the sort where the two-tops are all pushed together to fit whoever's there, so we end up seated in an impromptu eight-top with some NPCs and place our order. In the time between then and when the food arrives, we moved to a separate table of our own closer to the back wall.

My order was for some dolmas (rolled grape leaves stuffed with rice and lamb); what I got was a styrofoam soup bowl full of pistachios and an assurance that my dinner "will be right out." Reader, it was not. Everyone else had their meal served, eaten, and cleared by the time my second "course" came - a handful of ghost peppers (which looked more like white cayenne peppers than the real thing, and tasted surprisingly good - hot but sweet) and an apology for the terrible service.

Fine, whatever. Where's the bathroom?

Through an unmarked door, down a flight of stairs, and into what was basically a fruit cellar with badly-hung doors and the general atmosphere of the shitter from Trainspotting.

Uh, no. Next?

Through an entirely different restaurant (homestyle Southern by butch lesbians), up another flight of stairs, and... open to the landing. It was just a toilet seat over a hole in the floor, and the proprietor, standing there with a hose, on bidet duty.

Uh, no thanks. Is there another one?

Three flights of rickety stairs down, around a corner, and into a very fancy Ethiopian joint (marble floors, staff in black and white, the whole shebang). Their bathroom was both crowded and somehow no better than either of the previous ones.

Whatever. Maybe my food is ready.

It was tamales. And by that point, they were already down to room temperature, so I got them and the remaining peppers to go, and decided to head for home.

Unfortunately, a call went out - there was an active shooter outside, which caused the expected amount of chaos and panic among all and sundry.

On the upside, it meant skipping out on the dinner bill.

Doubly unfortunately, my subconscious' love of going Dark City on me had awakened, so there was no longer a door out (thanks, Edward Hopper), so it was back down to the butch nook and out, into the recently-resolved crime scene, where several dozen cops in riot gear were standing around a lump of meat and two twitching hands that had apparently been the shooter, and which they referred to as "Grasshopper."

Hm. There isn't a double trolley line anywhere near my place, nor is there a slope nearly this steep leading to an underpass filled with women's college students heading back from class to a partially-flooded underground pseudo-commune slash permanent rave.

William Gibson's characters from the Bridge series would have felt right at home. I did not, but taking a modicum of initiative, I asked if they had a bathroom.

They did, but it was no better than any of the other ones, and, getting lost on my way back to the surface, I found myself in a small bistro, where I was very, very happy to discover that a new recurring character has decided to make an appearance in my dreamshit - a young woman known to dream-me as "Hottie" (a sluttier version of Fairuza Balk circa The Craft, and who referred to me as "Mister Bad"), and an unknown friend of hers, who she was in the middle of pranking by ordering... a pint glass of Ouzo that she said was water.

I don't normally get sexytimes in my dreams, but we made out briefly and with much vigor before I decided once again to make my way home.

But first, I apparently had to play the part of the world's worst school bus driver, and flush several children down a slightly-less-disgusting bidet to yeet them towards their homes. Unfortunately, the last kid got stuck, rendering my hopes of finally being able to relieve myself dashed once more.

I still got cold water sprayed up my ass despite not trying to use it.

Rude.

Remembering my Hitchhiker's Guide minutae, I realized that I needed to get out of the first building via a different opening than I'd entered, so I had to do a lot of backtracking, and eventually found myself standing in the middle of the main street (which in reality is literally called Main Street), waiting to cross and get the last bit of the way to my destination. A regular cop gave me the stink-eye as he drove past. I raised my middle finger at him (thank you, Raven D'Arkness Dementia Way).

I heelied down the hill towards my house.

Then, and only then, did I finally wake up and pee.

#dreamshit

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kaleidoscopic-quiddity · 1 year

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some thoughts regarding the latest bnha ep

Okay first of all I find studio bones’ dedication to objectifying Dabi to be hilarious

Someone really looked at that panel of him lying on the couch and went ‘make him sluttier!!’

Small waist, lower set pants so we can see his v-lines, they are really gunning for that fan service quota

Okay moving on to my actual serious thoughts now:

So this ep confirmed a long-time theory for me, one that I’ve had since probably before these og chapters were even dropped, and I’ve slowly been getting more sure about

It seems, to me at least, that Natsuo’s conception was coerced, and that Shouto’s was the result of rape

Like, we know that Rei consented to having Touya and Fuyumi

Whether or not she wanted Touya is up for debate, but she at least presumably consented to having a child as part of the quirk marriage agreement

And in Fuyumi’s case it’s literally canon that Rei wanted another kid and thought it’d be good for Touya to have a sibling

Obviously there’s massive ethical concerns and questions of consent raised by the whole arranged/paid marriage situation, but in and of themselves, those two pregnancies don’t appear to have been opposed by Rei

In the case of Natsuo, Rei initially refused to have more kids, since she knew that Touya knew that Enji was only producing babies in hopes of them having the perfect quirk to surpass All Might, and she rightfully assumed that having more kids would fuck with his metal health and make him feel even more unwanted/worthless

But Eni basically convinced/coerced her with ‘oh but if we get a kid with the right quirk that’ll finally convince Touya to give up on being a hero and hurting himself in his attempts to become one’

So it's possible that she did technically give her consent in that situation, but it was given under duress and she was coerced into it with the wellbeing of one of her other children as a bargaining chip

As for Shouto’s conception,in both the manga and anime we see Enji pissed off/distraught after presumably learning about Natsuo’s quirk or lack of one, (you can pry the quirkless Natsuo hc from my cold dead hands), a shot of Rei’s face looking terrified, and then an immediate cut to her holding baby Shouto looking both relieved and exhausted

I mean it is possible that Shouto’s conception was coerced like Natsuo’s, but the whole framing of the sequence really makes it feel like Enji got worse with each subsequent kid, his abhorrentness reaching its peak with Shouto

Yeah so the implication there is… dark as all hell

But also narratively fascinating to me,

Like Shouto literally canonically barely regards his own abuse, he hates Endeavor because of what he did to his Mom (and his siblings)

There's definitely some resentment there over how he was isolated as a kid, and literally a product of selective breeding, but the bulk of Shouto’s feelings towards Endeavor, at least pre-sports festival, definitely read more as ‘I hate you for abusing Mom’ rather than ‘I hate you for abusing me’

(this is because Todoroki Shouto is an incredibly, incredibly kind person who puts the pain of his loved ones above his own, and who feels/hurts so much more for others that himself and augh he's such a sweetheart I love him sm but I need him to gain some self esteem right this instant)

Like, we know canonically that he blames Endeavor (and not Rei at all) for the burn on his face, but he also seems to carry some guilt over it himself?? As if it’s somehow his fault he happens to resemble his Father a bit??

We know he at least felt bad enough about being similar to his Dad (again, something that he has no control over) to not use his fire in combat for roughly 10 years

So the thought of Shouto, who was already well aware that his birth was both the result of a paid marriage that his Mother likely got very little say in, and a literal eugenics experiment by his Dad with the sole goal of producing and shaping a child into the perfect pawn to surpass All Might, also learning that his conception was the result of sexual assault/coercion??

The angst potential there is unlimited and totally fascinating

Obviously a shounen manga aimed at, like, 12 year olds isnt gonna get into topics that deep past making some vague, dark, implications, but it's all food for thought nonetheless

Speaking of dark as hell implications:

I don’t know if it was already there in the manga and I just missed it like a dumbass or if Horikoshi added it in after the fact when he was consulted for this season’s production

But the implication that Shouto awoke his quirk as a baby specifically as a result of Touya lashing out and attacking him???

That shit had me reeling

Like augh the fucking tragic irony of Touya, desperate to just be paid attention to by his father, being the one to inadvertently bring out Shouto’s quirk, the very thing that made his dad fully give up on him

And of course, of course, Shoto would awaken his quirk in self defence from a family member attacking him, of course a character who’s whole theme is family and abusive/dysfunctional dynamics, and origin, would have his power awoken in that way

It also, just, adds a whole ‘nother layer to the whole chapter 39 ‘it’s your power isn't it?!’ / chapter 352 ‘Yes, this is my power’ parallel

(Todoroki Shouto is the character of all time I love him with every bit of myself I swear)

Okay quickfire round because I still have lots more thoughts about the Todoroki family:

It was already upsetting enough in manga but the scene of Endeavor yelling at Rei and slapping her as Shouto screams and cries and tells him ‘not to bully Mommy’?? Literally had me physically flinching

I will never be anything but and Endeavor hater okay I don’t give a shit about his redemption arc I need that bitch dead

Can’t wait for the ‘Dabi is a misogynist’ discourse to once again get reignited

Obviously his attitude towards Rei and Fuyumi isn’t okay, but Touya was a child abuse victim lacking in the maturity to see that his Mother and Fuyumi were just as much victims as he was

And to be fair, whilst Rei certainly was also just as much a victim, and didn’t have any power in the situation of her marriage, I do feel that Touya’s resentment towards her, as a child who believes that its his Mom’s job to look after him, is a bit warranted, not necessarily right, but warranted

Speaking of bad faith discourse regarding Touya’s actions, if I see one more ‘him attacking baby Shouto makes him just as bad as Endeavor’ type take I’m melting my fucking phone

How are you gonna look at a 13 year old, self harming, victim of child abuse, with such a warped sense of self worth that he is literally desperate for even a hint of his abuser’s attention/approval, lashing out in jealousy at the sibling who has replaced him and made him, in his Father’s eyes, a worthless failed experiment, and go ‘oh he’s just as bad as the grown man who made the active decision to beat his wife and kids???

The lack of reading comprehension in the bnha fandom is unreal but especially regarding the Todoroki’s

In a similar vein I literally cannot deal with people who victim blame Rei, or Fuyumi and Natsuo, for not ‘getting Shouto out of that situation’ or ‘being complacent in his abuse even as adults’

Like ohhhh my godddd literally all of them were victims in an extremely unbalanced power dynamic, that's the whole point

Please go back to middle school English class since obviously you all were too busy doodling eyes to pay any attention

also I hate that Hawks, of all people, has more sympathy for an abuser that his victims

‘Even if what Dabi said about the Todoroki family was true, I’m sure things are different now’

Sir literally what reason do you have to believe that??

Hero worships rots your fucking brain I guess

Ok finally I have some thoughts about that lil preview we got of the vestiges:

I hate Shinomori’s colour pallate so fucking much I hate I hate it I hate it

I always imagined him with white/lavender hair, and silver eyes, and a purple hero costume with purple scars on his face from quirk overuse/incompatibility like Nine from Heroes: Rising

I hate the blonde hair I hate the green costume it's all so so ugly I hate it all

HOWEVER

Since he was first introduced I have pictured the 2nd user with pink/coral hair, AND I WAS FUCKING RIGHT

The wave of smug vindication I felt upon seeing that his hair colour was practically identical to what I’d imagined him with was unreal

I’m not too sure how I feel about the 3rd user with light blue hair?? I always imagined it as light brown or dirty blonde

I think what colour his eyes are and how they animate Fa Jin is really gonna decide for me whether I like it or not

I pictured En’s costume as dark blue denim (kinda like Jeanist) and whilst the red isn’t bad, the opposite actually, I kinda miss that mental image

Vestige Might should be glowing and flickering like a fire, not just a collection of gold swirls, do him justice!!!

Okay I'm done

#bnha #todoroki family #tw: abuse mention #tw: child abuse #tw: rape mention #tw: sa mention #ask to tag #og post //

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pavlovsbimbo · 7 months

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What's your comfort level with polyamory? How've you explored that so far, and how would you like to in the future? (Or, if you're not big on it, why do you think it's not for you?)

Comfort level = currently polyamorous

I listened to the audiobook for The Ethical Slut and honestly I just continue to get sluttier with time.

I would talk to my partners about it specifically, but I'm fairly sure they'd both be down for me attending a kink party where I'm likely to be basically a toy for anyone. Ideally it'd be a hypnokink party!

Sorry I got distracted, but I sorta answered it. I am comfy with it and my partners are comfy with it, and I'd love to have the opportunity to really explore the options available when it comes to things. Not just for parties, but like long term partners too. I just really love a lot of people and types of people and I feel like I could really enjoy myself.

#asks

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popperazzi · 1 year

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hello

I’ve been on @kentuckyfriedcoochie for 12 years, but this is my new main! got a few close irls/family on there who I don’t want, and while they don’t have tumblrs, they still peep on there. also wanted to be sluttier and KFC didn’t feel like the right place for it so basically it’s gonna be the same shitposting but with gay shit and thirst traps thrown in there too :-) in the meantime!

- I’m 24, cancer sun/leo moon/sag rising

- Queer/pan, single

- Born in Chicago, raised in LA, lived in Italy and Scotland, and now living in Brooklyn!

- Went to the University of Edinburgh, hence my living in Scotland. Class of 2020 :’)

- I love traveling (been to 35 or 36 countries on 4 continents), photography, working out, finding new music, and trying to get back into learning languages after a while

- Conversational to intermediate in Spanish, French and Italian and speak a lil bit of Mandarin and Danish

but enjoy the shitshow and horny posts and feel free to send me asks/nudes/etc!!!! :))))

#about me

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presidenthimbostan · 1 year

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Political Treatises on the Inevitability of Obesity in the Political Systems that have heretofor been discovered by man

As women and men become sluttier and dudes get beefier and women get chunkier it is inevitable that that fattest and sluttiest of them will fuck a lot. There will be mutual titty sucking and also ass stuff and vagina play and tongue rubbing. I will ask her how she likes it and how it feels and I will be able to go feel her hard up her puss with my hand and tongue. I'd love to work with a bisexual fat woman who I can pleasure as she pleasures my big fat tit wife. I will titty fuck her and titty suck her with my mouth and use my penis to stimulate her tits and boobs and breasts with my cock and our lesbian friend will fluff you at your vagina or also suck on my asshole like it is my ear. I can even come into your vagina because you don't have to be on the pill. maybe we are trying to have a family and kids and stuff so we are just trying. but maybe I have a condom on. baby if you don't want to be on the pill we'll work it out. how do you want it. how does it feel. So that is why there will be all kinds of fat women who are dumb and stupid and also smart and good at sports. I will do whatever I can to make a woman feel good. I mean this one hundred percent sincerely. That a woman feeling safe. it is possible to get off on the safety of women for me a creep with bad social skills okay. i'd suck on her titties all day. ANd if she got tired HER WIFE COULD. she'd be blond like a fox news lesbian. and I'd watch. if a man wanted it I'd feel weird about it but I'd be okay to experiment. I think a man could do an EXCELLENT JOB on my asshole with his mouth. but we also will cross that bridge when we come to it infrastructure. so basically rubbing one off with bibi and olaf schulza and the PA together. fucking for peace

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elliesgaymachete · 3 years

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Okay @rabidchilde I decided to make a whole new post for this so replies wouldn’t limit my text but yeah, I LOVE bards

First, let’s get one thing straight: I hate that bards are always written off as the slutty stereotype. It’s fine if someone wants to play a slutty bard, but that’s not ALL there is to them, and there are plenty of other Charisma based classes that could easily be sluttier (sorcerers are way sluttier than bards IMO, as someone who plays both)

I think I’m usually drawn to charisma based classes and I’m not sure why, but because of that I’ve literally played all of them: Bard, Paladin, Sorcerer, Warlock. Out of other CHA spellcasters, bards have the most versatility with their spellcasting. They get more spell slots than warlocks and paladins, and they can learn more spells than sorcerers. Plus additional magical secrets (lore bard feature) and magical secrets (regular bard feature) means you can learn a few spells from ANY class list!

Also, bards are NERDS! They go to school for their talents and have to study, just like wizards! Playing with that aspect of their character is always fun, and my bard is definitely the history/research nerd in my party lol

There are a lot of really interesting subclasses that give you a wide variety of character options. College of lore is great for playing a nerd or a bookworm, college of glamour is great for performers or someone more theatrical (IE Misty Moore from The Unsleeping City), and college of swords and valor are a great option if you want to fight too!

They also have great multiclassing potential! Again just in Fantasy High from Dimension 20 you have Fig Faeth who is a warlock/bard multiclass and Fabian Seacaster who is a fighter/bard multiclass

Now for some general class features bards have that I love:

BARDIC INSPIRATION! It can be underutilized and easily forgotten but if you have a bard who reminds people they are inspired it comes in clutch. Often the difference is made by a few numbers and inspiration can be just enough to push you over the edge to succeed sometimes! Plus each subclass has a unique way to use bardic inspiration!

JACK OF ALL TRADES! Again, sometimes one or two can make all the difference. This allows you to add half your proficiency bonus rounded down to all ability checks you aren’t already proficient in. That’s right, ALL. Do you have -1 strength modifier and need to escape a grapple? Not anymore! Add half that proficiency bonus, baby! It also includes initiative rolls!

SONG OF REST! Again, sometimes it can come down to just a few hit points and this gives you and your entire party a few FREE hit points on a short rest!

EXPERTISE! This is a fun one that only bards and rogues have but it allows you to DOUBLE your proficiency for a few abilities you are skilled in! Plus, when you create a bard, you can choose ANY of your abilities to be proficient in. They don’t have any limitations on skills so you could have expertise in literally whatever you think would be the most useful

Also, Vicious Mockery may not be all that powerful, but if it works it’s very possible to insult the monster to death, and I think that’s beautiful

Anyway, I’ve probably gone on enough and definitely covered the basics. But basically, bards are WONDERFUL and I think everyone should give it a try even if you don’t think you’ll like it! They’re a versatile enough class that I think they’ve got something for everyone 😉

#dnd #dungeons and dragons #bard #also if you have ANY questions about bards lmk!!

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bisluthq · 3 years

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this is like really random but i have to vent. so basically i’m 20 years old and in my second-year at a uk university. and like i had the worst first-year of my life, made no friends, and got long covid plus really bad depression so yeah it wasn’t great. and now im back at uni i just am really feeling my lack of experience. iv never even properly kissed anyone let alone had sex and all the drinking games etc revolve around sex. i’m pretty sure i’m bi just like based on what i masturbate to but i’v only ever looked at guys as potential relationships. i just like don’t know how to navigate the social world with no friends and no sexual experience, it just feels impossible. and all my friends from home (1 of which is at uni with me) have boyfriends or at least have had sex. and also clubbing feels totally revolved around sex and kissing. it’s really hard to admit to people that i’m a virgin because people assume i’m a prude or a weirdo when i’m not i just haven’t really had the opportunity. i’m just feeling like such a loser atm. oh aaaand i actually really want a boyfriend rn.

Firstly, this is totally normal and nothing to be ashamed of. There’s no timeline for these things.

Secondly, so this is going to be a long winded Agony AuNat but sometimes I think my best ones are. In a way, this reminds me of a friend I had like 20-21 at uni. Basically we became friends because I caught her forum role playing and I was like “lmaoooo I used to do that too!” and we like bonded over it and like very quickly I began realizing that she did it on the kinds of sites me and my online friends laughed at because they weren’t ⚡️aesthetic⚡️ or sexy. Like this was some high fantasy bullshit lol - no offense also cool - on like ProBoards when we were already in the Jcink era. Anyway no biggie. This girl - a horse girl at 20 still and not in the rich bitch way - proceeded to like… idolize me and obvi y’all know how much I like attention so I loved it. And one night she asked me for advice on how to get kissed because she had been like… really wanting to lose her virginity but things just weren’t happening. I proceeded to give the worst advice ever because I too was just a young un. I said “don’t worry it’s gonna happen for you!!! Like I’m sure your crush likes you!! Don’t stress you’re so pretty and sweet!” And I believed I was saying the right stuff and it comforted her ngl so I was like 👏🏻👏🏻 go Nat you’re the best at giving advice.

Except here’s the problem - it still wasn’t happening. She was going to parties with me and I was like dressing her sluttier like some weird teen romcom movie where I was giving her a makeover and like… no one was biting.

And then - for those who remember the Nat Cinematic Universe - it turned out that rando from my 21st who I randomly fucked? Ya dudes that was her crush lol and she hadn’t told me because she thought I’d figure it out lol and she was mad at me and we sorta stayed friends until I fucked that guy’s friend which was nbd to anyone involved because my bestie fucked him and tbh I fancied the friend because he was this average sized weedy dark haired boy who was very weird looking and she exploded at me and called me a slut and shit and that was that, friendship over.

Unsure what happened next, but the reason I’ve given you this backstory is from my current POV I gave extremely bad advice so I’m gonna try correct with you tonight.

Unless you’re in high school when friends of friends can go between people and say you have a crush, and then you text them and like bam you’re exclusive, you have to work to get ass or make friends. Okay the other exception is if you’re like SUPER hot idk about that life, but tbh probs even then. Life isn’t a teen movie, and you’re not gonna just catch someone’s eye and that’ll be that. Dressing nicely might be part of it, doing your hair and makeup in whatever style you want, and making it clear up front - especially at uni when imo branding™️ matters a lot - what your interests are and such shit all factor in. I’m not saying change who you are because again that’s supremely bad advice: figure out who you are. Figure out what you want to wear (experiment!), who you want to talk to (strike up convos on campus!), what you like doing (try things out!) and - most importantly - what you’re comfortable with. Try drinking - and if you don’t like it, don’t do it. Try flirting - and if you don’t like it, know that you can go from friends to this and not everyone enjoys that. Try clubbing - and if you don’t like it, know that there are a ton of societies you can join on campus and campus events you can go to that don’t revolve around that, so seek those out and find your tribe.

Fundamentally, college is what you make of it.

Which means that like unfortunately my dude, you’ll make a fool of yourself. Probably more than once.

But know that friends won’t manifest and boys won’t manifest unless you make an effort and put yourself out there. Ask people to coffee. Ask people to the pub. Girls, boys, enbies, whoever.

Re the anxiety about “never having done this before” - I think that’s totally normal. But also like lots of other people haven’t and everyone has had a first time. In drinking games you can lie lol. You don’t need to advertise it’s your first time for anything if you’re uncomfortable with it. I didn’t tell my first kiss he was my first kiss lol because it was unnecessary info for him tbh (it wasn’t hs boyfriend even tho I’m pretty sure I was his lol but he was my third 😌).

But you also don’t need to be shy about it because honestly 2nd year uni is so fucking young. It’s not like you’re coming to me as a 40 year old virgin and asking for advice (again no timeline but I’m not there yet so maybe not the right person to give it). Most of the people you’re hanging out with haven’t had a ton of sexual experience either lmao. On my 20th birthday I had been with exactly two people, my Angel boyfriend (in hindsight) hs ex and the Rabbi’s son (literally no one’s Angel boyfriend but hopefully he and his tiny dick are married now and Mazels if so) who I fucked a few days after we broke up to prove a point. I was a bad lay (and remain so with guys unless they’re into The Hiddles Experience, not for lack of opportunities, but because we don’t have to master all things). I also - unlike you - had never masturbated. I’d never had an orgasm. I liked sex with hs ex but couldn’t explain what I liked or why, it was just fun sometimes and other times it wasn’t. (In hindsight with clit action it was fun and with pure thrusting it wasn’t). So the fact that you have wanked already gives you a head start over many of the girls guys will be meeting.

So like… figure out what’s comfortable for you. Try different things out. Walk away when you don’t like it. Never do stuff that goes against your values. Don’t be overly shy in ways that wind up making you uncomfortable, like with the story that started this, and don’t expect these things to happen if you make no effort. That applies to friendships and ass alike. And sometimes what you think will be ass will turn into friendships and sometimes what you think will be friendship will turn into more. Let it. That’s what uni’s for.

Final point: try reduce the pressure of having a boyfriend. It’s fine if it happens, but since as you say you’re not a prude, it’s fine if it doesn’t. It will eventually. Try go into encounters with the open mindedness of “this could be ass, this could be friendship, this could be more” and like clear eyes full hearts can’t lose tbh.

Final final point: join societies. Join all the societies. The best way to both get ass and make friends and make friends discussing the ass you’re getting is by joining societies.

Good luck, hope this helped, love you lots and enjoy this year and the next (and beyond if you choose Honours or postgrad).

#agony aunat

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honeybinnies · 4 years

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CHARACTERS ☆ han jisung, reader (you), seo changbin, bang chan (mentioned)

PLOT ☆ wherein jisung, the mafia’s assassin, has a mission to retrieve a heirloom from the mafia’s heiress, you. to his surprise, he easily finds you alone on a night club, and finally, he work begins.

WORD COUNT ☆ 2.5k

WARNINGS ☆ this is rated E for sexual activity, alcohol and mentions of drugs. to minimize dashboard consumption, a keep reading header will be placed after the first paragraph. this is to respect other people’s content, as well as the time of the viewers.

DISCLAIMER ☆ i do not own stray kids. they belong to jyp entertainment. i only own the edit and the storyline itself.

NOTE ☆ this one-shot is written in third person point of view, so all mentions of “the woman” are directed to all female readers.

[10:18pm] jisung’s doing alright. wait, scratch that, jisung’s doing more than just alright. in fact, he’s living his best life at the moment. it’s ten in the evening in the noisy, sin-filled streets of gangnam-gu, and the bass is loud in the club he’s currently at. jisung grins as hr struts around the squeaked floors of the night club, clad in a silk button-up tucked down into some nice black jeans, two of his buttons loosened, flashing a bit of his collarbone where his tattoo peeked out shyly. his blonde hair is swooped to the side, and smudge of dark eyeshadow and glossed lips masks his features, making him ten times more regal underneath the neon lights, more alluring. he’s thriving as he walks to the bar to heed for a martini on the house, and he looks at the swaying bodies grinding against the music, please, relaxed.

“now this feels like home.” he smirks, letting out a sigh before grabbing a hold of his martini. he takes his sweet time upon ravishing the contents, the liquid coating his throat with the burning sensation he was looking for. he doesn’t even notice someone slide next to him as he does so, and neither does he flinch from his spot when the man speaks up.

“don’t get too relaxed, ji.” the man remarks, voice laden with slight amusement. “remember, we’re here because chan wanted you to fulfill a mission.”

the said man noises apprehensively, and down the remains of his martini, the alcohol burning the rest of throat just the way he likes it. “please, changbin. cut me some slack. i haven’t felt like this in years.” the statement leaves a snort from changbin himself, and turns to take a swig of beer before facing jisung once again. “it’s the only time you’ll ever be feeling like this, jisung. remember, we still have a little nation to overthrow?”

the younger tilts his head to face changbin, eyebrow quirked up in a unimpressed manner at the mention a pathetic empire muttered at his very ears. “don’t get me started on jaehyun’s bullshit, hyung. he doesn’t mean anything to me at the moment.”

changbin could only smirk at the flatness of his tone, before he spots a familiar figure moving across jisung. his gaze only darkens by the percentage, as a low hum draws from his throat. “9:00. that’s our target.” he gestures jisung to the figure, to which the other looks to his 9:00. he sees a woman in a scarily low v-neck cocktail dress, sparkled with red sequences, and jisung thinks that the make-up’s too slutty on her. he fights the urge to roll his eyes on the accentuated cleavage the dress is exposing her, however, he has no time to fancy on this visuals. his target is on the heirloom she adorns on her neck, and that is enough for jisung to have the need to just get it over with.

so, he flashes changbin an easy smile, and places his martini glass down. he pats his button-up once, twice, and adjusts a stiff strand on his parted forehead. “easy peasy. watch me.”

“i’d rather not see your seduction skills, ji. just do it.” changbin groans in response, and swats his hand in dismissal. jisung’s already doing his job as he ignores his underboss, and makes his way to the woman, who’s currently seated alone. she looks bored as she scans the place, as if she wants something interesting to happen to her, something exciting. jisung’s been there once; his first few years as an assassin was pretty much the same old boring routine that he’d find himself breaking every once in a while. he snorts at the memory of a fuming chan towering over him one time, when he was scattered on the sheets of another woman, cum dry on his stomach and blunts smoked beside the tabletop of the bedroom. he had rendered his life a mess that time, lost and nowhere to go. he had a mind to thank chan sometime for bringing him out of that misery, but as of now, he owes him treasure.

the moment jisung meets gazes with the bored woman, his expression switches to something more amiable. ease it up, he thinks to himself. let’s not bring things too fast. “hey, need company?”

the woman looks up at him, and snorts before looking back at the crowd, sullen. “go away. i don’t want to look like i got stood up tonight.”

jisung blinks at this, and momentarily judges her appearance before saying anything else. she has got to be kidding. only a dumb slut would show up to a date wearing clothes like that. either way, he’s dealt with sluttier women in his life, so he’s not the one to talk. “stood up, huh? don’t you think it’s a little past 10pm to be waiting for a date? and at a night club?”

it takes a while for the woman to respond, only busying herself with swirling the olive on her drink. after a few moments, she sighs in defeat, and nudges over to the seat in front of her. “fine. you have a point. take that seat.”

the smile that jisung fakes is convincing enough to satisfy his reaction, and occupies the seat next to him. he knows he’s about to engage himself in some absolutely boring talk with the slutty woman, and judging from her standoffish mood, he has a feeling he won’t enjoy this so much. however, his time’s ticking, and it’s only so long before that pendant is finally on his hands. he decides to just go with the flow, and finally exit when it’s done. “so?” jisung begins, folding his arms on the metal table. “you wanna talk about this bad date?”

the woman smacks her cherry-colored lips in exaggeration, and lets out a small breath before looking at him. “we were supposed to meet up at this restaurant hours ago, but he never came. he messaged me saying that he had some business to deal with, and honestly, it’s all he ever says nowadays. like, what does he think this relationship is? i’m not here to wait around and hope he comes back!”

jisung pretends to be interested in the conversation, but his mind is thinking about other things. a cheesecake would be so good right now. “hm, he seems like a douche.”

“he’s an asshole, that’s what he is!” the woman exclaims, swatting the skewered olives back on the drink. she fumes for a while, but the more she acknowledges jisung, her face softens by a tint. “thanks for keep up with my bullcrap tonight. i really needed company.”

jisung only hums in response, sending the woman a distant smile before he lets her continue. “i just need to feel free right now, you know? it’s like, i wanna just--just get risky with some man and feel no remorse for it. i mean, fuck that guy, am i right? who care if he sees me with another man. one night stands are better than him.”

the assassin breaks his baggage of thoughts and piques his interest at her. he could almost taste victory on his hands, a familiar grasp of something that could be won in the snap of a finger. this could be his gateway to the jewel adorned on her neck, and he’s relieved that she’s making things easier for him. he smiles at her then, one that’s less softer and more suggestive. “that’s why you came to this night club, right?”

then, he tilts his head, and smooths his fingers into her arm, stroking the skin gently, as if to channel comfort. it’s subtle, but he knows it would make her swoon. “then what’s stopping you from getting risky? this is the perfect place for one night stands, sweetheart.”

surely enough, the woman opens her mouth to say something in return, but she finds herself staring at jisung instead, only fully taking him in at the moment. his eyes are soft, but glinting at something she hopes it’s what she’s thinking of, and the rubs of his fingers against her arm are every bit comforting. his touches are like milk and honey trickling on her skin, and his lips seem sweeter on her vision, glossy, enticing. “this...”

jisung tries not to smirk at how he’s managed to get her under his spell that quick, and continues to run his fingers through her shoulder. “what?”

there’s a sudden want that bubbles on the core of her stomach at each stroke he places on her, and her hands ball into fists above her thighs, trying her best not to show how much she wanted jisung right there and then. however, he heart says otherwise, and she end up blurting the words she so badly wanted to say. “you--can, can i kiss you?”

bingo.

the strokes on her arm stop, and jisung plasters a frown at her question, or rather, her command. “oh, sweetheart, do you think i’m the perfect guy to be doing this with?”

“as i said,” the woman gulps down and inches closer to him, suddenly feeling daring, feeling needy. “i’m looking for anybody at the moment, and i don’t care who i end up with. besides, you’re pretty hot. i wouldn’t mind fucking a hot man like you.”

the man hums in consideration and slides his hand down to the curve of her waist, pulling her in even more. he could basically feel the hunger and pure want radiating from her body, and the shudder he feels under his fingers is enough for him to know that she could barely contain herself before she pounces on him. so, he gazes at the woman in the same crazed manner, and grips her waist, voice lowered to something darker. “then by all means, let me be your guest.”

it’s only seconds before the woman crashes her lips with his, the musk of their perfumes wafting in the air as she eagerly climbs onto his lap to deepen the kiss. his lips are delicious just as she imagined, and his movements are fluid and filled with years of experience, swiping skin to skin, releasing to locking. jisung internally finds this disgusting however, but keeps on urging the kiss in deeper, teasing the seams of her mouth with his tongue before she gives it an entrance. he’s appalled by the sudden straddle of her hips against his thigh, and the friction only makes him half-hard.

he makes sure to busy himself with his lips passionately colliding against hers, and his hips bucking to give her the pleasure she wants, to make her hotter and hungrier than she was before. as the woman speeds up with her straddles, he smooths his palm up to the back of her nape, where he skillfully unclasps the pendant and tucks it neatly inside his pocket. he smiles onto the hot exchange of kisses at his acquired item, and continues to kiss her for as long as she desires.

unfazed by what he had just done, the woman pulls away from the sloppy kiss and tries to undo his buttons, fingers fumbling to release an ounce of skin from his button-up. however, jisung snatches her wrist, and eyes her dangerously, his voice hoarse and deeper than usual. “i think we should be in a more private space if you want to do that to me, sweetheart.”

the wild smile that spreads on her lips meant her well, and jisung chuckles at such a sight before he leans up to kiss her once on the lips, the touch lingering. “say, why don’t you be a good girl for me and,” another kiss, this time on the corner of her mouth, “make yourself comfortable for me in the room right over there?”

he peeks up to catch her reaction, and sees her eyes closed shut, trying to feel every bit of his kisses warming her skin. satisfied, he continues, at peppers his mouth to her cheek, trailing all the way to her earlobe. “then, i want you to cover yourself up for me, yeah?” he slides a silk sash on her hands, and he doesn’t even need to say anything in order for her to what she would do with it. he runs his palms up and down her waist as he could see the bubbling excitement and arousal building upon her while she feels the silk on her hands, and speaks up through the droning sounds of the club. “i want you to be ready for me, so you’re gonna have to wait for a while.”

to tease her for the hell of it, he grumbles into her earlobe, and pulls her hips close to him yet again, only harsher and more dominating. “you think you can do that for daddy?” he licks her earlobe, and smiles wickedly when she shudders above him. he always loves it when he know that he could only ruin her.

“y-yes, daddy.” the woman breathes out, hands desperately holding onto his shoulders. she’s driven wild when jisung responds with a moan sounding on her ear, and she suppresses a moan herself when she could feel the straps of her dress sliding off teasingly, courtesy of jisung’s touches. “mmm, i love it when you call me that.” finally, he pats her ass, and gestures her to the empty room two blocks away from their spot. “go on, doll yourself for daddy, and remember, no peeking.”

he expects her to protest at some point, but he isn’t disappointed when she follows his command instead, gathering her belongings and scurrying her way towards the unoccupied room. jisung stays seated for a bit, stretching his neck from the position he’s been in for quite some time, before he finally stands. he doesn’t even bother to go after her, all his words masked with lies, and approaches the male stripper instead, cashing him with a generous amount of money. “give her the best night she’s ever had. she deserves it.”

“yes, mister han.” the stripper bows automatically, and jisung nods back in response before finally dismissing himself. he makes his way to changbin, who’s been seated there all this time, and flashes the pendant at his face, smiling proudly. “see? i told you i could do it.”

changbin could only stare at him with a deadpan expression, and states bluntly, “oh my, i was so turned on, i think my cock is hard.”

the younger just rolled his eyes at his hyung’s sarcasm, and pockets the pendant. “come on, let’s just give chan the pendant.” he and changbin finally make their leave after that, and jisung doesn’t even think once of the woman all dolled up under his spell. after all, it’s what he’s known for in this crowd of sinners. everybody has a strive to lust for life, but he could only trade life for lust. it’s all he’s ever done since the day he turned 13, and not once did he regret any bit of it.

#stray kids imagines #stray kids scenarios #stray kids smut #stray kids #skz #han jisung #han jisung smut #honbinnies writes #happy valentines day ig #this is derived from a roleplay my irl and i did sooo #forgive me if my style of writing seems a little off #it was difficult to translate script-style format to paragraphs siz #but basically this is how things went down in that hot mess of an rp

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