#at some point he emailed me saying he was getting married again | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

koolades-world · 1 year

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More Obey me! Headcannons

had so much fun last time I wanted to do it again

Satan is so smart, but has issues doing basic math and refuses to admit it, like he can’t figure out fifteen plus seven without his fingers or a calculator (is this me projecting? maybe)

Belphie bought himself and Mc matching house slippers. Mc thought Beel felt left out and made Belphie buy a pair for him too

Beel has a huge green thumb, and takes upon himself to save plants he thinks are sad or lonely. He buys the dying plants from the store to bring back to life (partially inspired by the chat where someone, forgot who, told beel that if he talked to plants they would grow faster my precious baby)

Lucifer is the best cook at the HoL, but rarely has time to cook. Beel is the second best but usually eats the ingredients before he can make anything with them. Mammon is probably the worst because Levi can make food from animes almost perfectly

Asmo once almost set a store he was collaborating with on fire with his rage alone because they spelt his name wrong

Beel probably needs a new toothbrush every couple weeks. Belphie probably gets toothbrushes mixed up and uses ones that aren’t his

Lucifer and Solomon like prune juice haha old men

The one thing Luke and Simeon have seriously disagreed on is if raisins belong in dessert. Michael likes them, so Luke does too. Simeon thinks they’re awful but never directly says it, so Lucifer usually says it for him

Despite always being online, Levi had not once checked his RAD email. He has 9,999+ emails, probably a lot more because 9,999 is where it stops counting

Mammon collects cool rocks and keeps them in a box under his bed

Satan’s hands are always freezing, so he sticks them under Mc (or a cat) when possible, or uses a charmed hot water bottle from Solomon that stays warm for days at a time

Solomon and Asmo have had matching bracelet sets for as long as they’ve known each other, and since they didn’t make them anymore, they got some custom done for Mc so they could also have them

For about 1,000 years, Thirteen though jelly beans were an actual kind of bean and Solomon never let her let it go

The first food Mc and Mammon ate on a date in the human world together was Taiyaki, so he made it a point to learn how to make them to surprise Mc (even though he’s a terrible cook) (I might make this a fic since I like this idea so much)

Diavolo has always wanted a Devildom version of a hamster but Barbatos refused to have any kind of rodent in the castle, rat or not

Luke probably downloads those stupid app games with the ads unironically

Satan’s favorite Disney Princess is Ariel because she ran off to do what she wanted without caring what her father thought, it’s giving daddy issues. He’s probably considered running off and marrying Mephisto to make Lucifer angry

Raphael unironically enjoys off brand chips and soda

Lucifer is a nail biter, and Asmo is helping him curve the habit by putting a nasty tasting top coat when he does his nails, and it’s also why he wears gloves all the time.

Belphie and Satan once went up to the humans world together to mess with people in Salem, Massachusetts with magic, which spawned several conspiracy theory books. They read them together and laugh as a past time

Diavolo once went to the human world in his demon form for,, reasons, and accidentally got written into ancient mythology because he got spotted by humans

Barbatos had a home garden for cooking and sometimes lets Asmo have leaves from some of the plants to make homemade skin care products

Mammon probably has lots of earwax. Don’t share your earbuds with him unless you make him clean them afterwards

Belphie has a really large water bottle that’s always on his side table. He wakes up randomly though the night, chugs an ungodly amount of water and then passed out again. In the mornings he has to piss really bad but is too lazy to get up and actually do it, so he just sits and complains. Even Beel isn’t sure how he’s able to drink that much water in a short amount of time

Satan likes waking up early to enjoy the morning air and read outside for a while since mornings can get hectic with his brothers

Thirteen’s favorite torture device is the Iron Maiden. She had her own that she bedazzled. Even Asmo is jealous and wants her to make him one too

Mammon introduced Diavolo to Gatorade, and instead of sneaking behind Lucifer and Barbatos’s backs to drink Demonus, they have secret Gatorade meetings

Diavolo and Lucifer definitely both had a hidden Dialuci stash of things and probably clash trying to collect limited edition things online

None of the Obey me cast took birthdays or passing of years seriously until Mc entered the picture and suddenly time was precious, and they actually kept track. Because of this, nobody is really sure how old the twins are

Mephisto thinks roosters want world domination

Asmo thinks cilantro tastes like soap and Levi thinks anything cola flavored tastes like cough medicine

Mammon's favorite party trick is one Mc taught him, which is rolling his tongue Everyone he meets, including his brothers, thinks it's so cool when really it's just a genetic thing

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sequinsmile-x · 3 months

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Protégé à Jamais

Aaron feels his blood boil, fury flooding his veins at the way the man in front of him dared to talk about the woman he loves.

-x-

Hi friends,

Not entirely sure where this one came from. I was driving to the grocery store this morning and some of the dialogue for this came into my head and here we are!

Hope you enjoy and please let me know what you think <3

-x-

Words: 3.7k

Warnings: brief canon typical violence

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

Emily had never been so happy.

She sighs contentedly as she leans into her fiance’s side, smiling as he pulls her even closer, his thumb rubbing back and forth on her hip through the material of her dress.

“Are you okay sweetheart?” Aaron asks, his smile soft as he looks at her. She’s almost eye level with him because of her heels and she takes advantage of it, nodding as she leans in to stamp her lips against his.

She hums as she pulls back, “I’m more than okay,” she says, kissing him again, smiling as she hears Derek groan and she makes a point of leaning further into the kiss, her hand coming up to cup Aaron’s cheek as she holds him in place as she licks her tongue through his mouth.

“Oh god Princess, we get it,” Derek says, shaking his head as he takes a sip of his beer, “You two love each other.”

“I think I preferred it when they used to pretend they weren’t in love with each other,” Dave grumbles jokingly, winking at Emily as she finally pulls back from Aaron, her hand dropping down to his chest, “They may have been annoying, but at least we didn’t have to watch them make out.”

Emily rolls her eyes at him, “Well excuse me for kissing my fiance at my engagement party.”

Party was a strong word and she knew it. They were out for a few drinks on a Thursday evening to celebrate her and Aaron’s recent engagement. She knew her actual engagement party would be something her mother insisted on throwing for them, an event full of dignitaries and people her mother considered important. This was the celebration she’d actually enjoy and she was going to make the most of it.

Aaron chuckles and runs his hand up and down her side, rubbing the soft green material of her dress between his fingers as he presses a kiss to her cheek, “Our engagement party, sweetheart.”

She shrugs playfully and winks at him before she finishes her beer, “Yes, baby. Our engagement party,” she kisses him again, “I need another drink.”

He smiles and kisses her cheek before he pulls away, “I’ll go get you one, I’ll be right back.”

She watches him go, her eyes fixed on his ass as he walks towards the bar. She groans as he gets there and as she sees him standing next to Agent Clark and Agent Lewis, “What are those creeps doing here?”

They were both idiots. She’d never particularly liked either of them, but made polite small talk with them in the kitchen or the elevator if she saw them. Clark would often flirt with her and had asked her out on a date more than once, although that had stopped at least since she came back from Paris.

“Garcia invited everyone,” Spencer says, and Emily smiles as she looks at Penelope and she avoids eye contact, “The email went out to the entirety of Quantico.”

“And those two have never turned down a free drink,” Dave says, seemingly regretting for the first time all evening putting his card behind the bar, “They are usually harmless enough,” he says, raising an eyebrow at Penelope.

“You guys are getting married, that should be celebrated!” Penelope exclaims, her gaze shifting to Emily who chuckles.

“Trust me Pen, Aaron and I have done plenty of celebrating by ourselves,” she says, her chuckle turning into a full laugh at the looks of horror that sweep across Derek and Dave’s faces.

JJ joins in and shakes her head, sympathetically patting Derek on the back, “You know if you stop reacting she’ll stop telling you about their sex life.”

“I think it’s sweet,” Penelope says, taking a sip from her cocktail, “Especially because I’d like another BAU baby to spoil soon.”

Emily chokes on a laugh and shakes her head at her friend as she purposely ignores the treacherous hope that rolls through her chest. She and Aaron had decided to start trying recently, just a few weeks before he proposed, and she’d thrown away her birth control. She didn’t want anyone else to know yet, wanted to keep it as something just between her and Aaron, but she was excited — the thought of adding to their family enough to make her giddy.

Her response is cut off by someone shouting at the bar and she looks back over, her eyes going wide as she spots Aaron standing close to Agent Clark, his fist clenched by his side as Clark cupped his nose, blood dripping down through his clasped fingers. Her eyes drift down to Aaron’s knuckles as she steps closer, and she sees how red they are. His skin was sure to bruise over old scars she knew as well as her own.

She scoffs as she steps closer, confusion driving her closer as he looks at her, his eyes wide as if he isn’t sure what he’s done himself.

“Aaron, what the hell is going on?”

___

They don’t get a chance to talk about it.

At first, it’s because he won’t. Whatever had driven him to punching a fellow agent was something he was keeping to himself, a subtle shake of his head during all of the commotion in the bar all she needed to know he wasn’t ready to talk yet. It was an unspoken rule that they didn’t push each other until they were ready, so as much as she wanted to know what was wrong she takes a step back.

The moment they get home, Jack is on them, asking lots of questions about their night and hugging them tightly as if it had been days since he’d last seen them, not hours. The little boy blatantly disregarding his bedtime just to see them, something Jessica apologises for as she leaves. He insists that Emily is the one to put him to bed, a distraction she’s grateful for as she reads him two stories before he falls asleep against her, his hand tangled in her hair.

Despite everything in her that was screaming to go check on Aaron, to go slide into his lap where he had hidden himself in the home office, she still gives him the space she knows he needs. She gets ready for bed and slips under the covers, eventually falling asleep with her hand pressed against his pillow.

When she wakes up in the morning she’s alone.

She knows he had joined her at some point, can feel the warmth that only came with him surrounding her and permeating into the sheets on his side of the bed. She frowns as she sits up and spots a folded piece of paper on his pillow and she picks it up, smiling sadly as she reads his familiar writing.

Gone to work early, I’ve left you coffee in the pot and sorted breakfast for you and Jack.

She sighs and gets out of bed, putting aside her concern for the man she loves as she steps out into the hallway and almost trips over Jack, the little boy already awake and excited about going to school. By the time she gets to the office she feels anxious, a deep pit in her stomach as she places her bag on her desk, her teeth sinking into her lower lip as she looks up at her fiance’s office.

“You ok there, Bella?”

She jumps and places her hand on her chest as she turns to look at Dave. She shakes her head at him and huffs out a breath, “Jesus Christ, Dave. We need to get you a bell or something.”

He smiles at her and holds his hand up in an apology, “Sorry, I didn’t think it was possible to sneak up on someone who used to be a spy.”

She hums and looks back at Aaron’s office, “I guess I’m distracted,” she sighs and turns to look at her friend, “He punched someone, Dave. And not just anyone, another agent. He could get in serious trouble over that,” she says, twisting her engagement ring around her finger, a habit that had replaced her previous one of biting her cuticles, “It’s not like him.”

Dave nods in agreement, “It’s not, but I’d say the guy deserved it, don’t you?”

She frowns and tilts her head at him, “Wait, do you know what happened?”

He hesitates for a moment, his eyes flicking up to Aaron’s office, “I may have spoken to Lewis last night, and got his side of what went down between Aaron and Clark.”

She stares at him, expecting him to carry on, and when he doesn’t she asks, “What did he say?”

Dave sighs and forces his hands into his pockets, “If he hasn’t told you I don’t know if I should-”

“Dave,” she says firmly, cutting him off, “Tell me what he said.”

He maintains eye contact with her for a second before he nods, clearing his throat before he tells her what he knows.

___

Aaron’s smile fades as he approaches the bar, internally groaning when he sees Agent Clark and Agent Lewis standing there.

“Clark,” he says, nodding politely as he stands next to them, “Lewis.”

Lewis nods in return, but Clark turns to look at him, the smell of whiskey flowing off of him like a cologne as he smiles widely as if they were old friends.

“Congrats on the engagement, Hotchner,” Agent Clark says, his words slurring together slightly as he tips his beer towards Aaron. Clark was not a good man, and certainly not an agent Aaron would ever want on his team. He had applied to join the BAU more than once but had always been denied, his attitude and work ethic well known throughout the FBI.

“Thanks, Clark,” Aaron says, smiling politely as he indicates to the bartender that he wants two more beers. He smiles as he hears Emily laugh from behind him, the irritation he’d felt building for the man standing next to him immediately fading.

“Prentiss has always been a catch,” Clark says, shaking his head as he places his beer back down, “You’re a better man than I am though, I don’t think I could do it.”

Aaron freezes, his body briefly tense as he turns ever so slightly to face the other man, already asking a question he isn’t sure he wants the answer to before he can stop himself. “What is that supposed to mean?”

Clark doesn’t pick up on his tone, nor does he pay any attention to Agent Lewis on his other side who was attempting to stop him from saying anything else. His hand on his friend’s shoulder as he tries to lead him away, Aaron’s well-known glare getting through to him.

“Well,” Clark says, shrugging, his hand slipping off the bar as he steps closer, “You wouldn’t buy a car that already has damage to the bodywork would you?” He says, smirking as he chuckles at what he’s said.

Aaron feels his blood boil, fury flooding his veins at the way the man in front of him dared to talk about the woman he loves. He clenches his fists at his sides, his short nails digging into his palm as he tries to distract himself, the dull pain in an attempt to pull himself back from the edge. Anger he’d inherited from his father bubbling in his belly, burning up his chest and turning bitter on his tongue.

“What did you just say?” He asks, the words forced out through his teeth as he fixes his hard glare on him.

“We should go-” Lewis starts, but Clark interrupts him, cutting him off as he pats Aaron on the shoulder as if they were old friends, as if they were exchanging shop talk rather than talking about his fiance.

“Come on Hotchner,” he says, chuckling again, “We all know what Doyle did to her. She’s always had an incredible figure, but it must be a mess under that dress,” he says, nodding towards Emily, “Sometimes it’s best never to unwrap a gift if you know what I mean.”

Aaron sees red, and anger he hasn’t felt in years, since he’d seen Foyet in the home he’d once shared with Haley, overtakes him. Any attempt to stop himself from reacting disappears. It happens in slow motion. He doesn’t feel like he’s in control of his body, as if he’s watching himself as he punches Clark, the feeling of his knuckles connecting with the other man's face spreading throughout his hand.

Everything speeds back up again as he pulls his hand back, the quiet in the bar almost deafening as it feels like everyone turns to look at them. Clark’s cursing and the way he cries out in pain as he cups his bleeding nose barely registering as he turns to look at Emily, guilt and shame filling his lungs as she furrows her brows at him, any enjoyment she’d found in the evening long gone.

“Aaron, what the hell is going on?”

___

She closes her eyes as Dave finishes and she shakes her head, love and a flicker of irritation aimed at her finace blooming in her chest.

“Lewis told you all of that?” She asks as she opens her eyes and looks at Dave, smiling sadly when she sees his anger at the way she’d been spoken about painted across his face as he nods, “Maybe he can be a witness if this goes to some kind of committee hearing.”

“He did,” he replies, “I don’t think Clark will be taking this up with anyone.”

She tilts her head and narrows her eyes at him, “What makes you say that?”

He shrugs nonchalantly as he smirks, “Let’s just say, someone may have reminded him of his place here and about all the things he should have been reported on over the years.”

She smiles at him and leans forward to kiss his cheek, squeezing his shoulder gratefully before she takes a step back, “Thanks Dave,” she says, blowing out a breath as she turns to look at Aaron’s office, “I’m going to go talk to him.”

Dave nods, “I’ll distract the others when they come in, give you some time.”

She chuckles, “Someone is already taking their role as best man seriously.”

He laughs and shakes his head at her, “For this, I expect godfather of your firstborn, Bella.”

She turns and starts to walk towards the steps leading to Aaron’s office, “I’m not making any promises.”

She takes a moment as she gets to his door and blows out a breath before she knocks and walks in, smiling softly at him as he looks up from his paperwork.

“Hi honey,” she says, closing the door behind her, “You left early this morning.”

He clears his throat and nods, the same shame he’d felt ever since he’d hit Clark swelling in his chest the moment he sees her.

“I had paperwork to do,” he says, folding his hands on his desk, “I didn’t want to wake you.”

They fall into an awkward silence and she hates it, her eyes drifting to his knuckles that were bruised just like she knew they would be before she looks back at him, their eyes meeting as he covers the damaged skin with his other hand. She knows what he’s thinking, the comparisons he will have no doubt made to a man she’ll never get to meet, the man who he spent his whole life worrying he’d turn into. There were moments when she wished she could have a few moments alone with his father, when she wished she could give him a piece of her mind, when she wanted nothing more than to yell at the man who was supposed to protect his son, to hide him from the harshness of the world instead of exposing him to it.

She knew they’d have to talk about it, that she’d have to tell him, again, that she didn’t need protecting, that she didn’t need him to fight her battles for her, but this wasn’t the time for that. Not yet anyway.

“Lewis told Dave what happened,” she says, still standing by the door, her hands clasped together as she once again twists her engagement ring, around her finger, “And Dave told me.”

Aaron sighs, and looks down at his desk, clasping his hands tighter around each other, pressing against his bruised flesh, as irritation at his friend flashes through him. He didn’t want her to know what Clark had said about her. It was one of the main reasons why he hadn’t told her last night, his desire to protect her, to stop her from being any more hurt than she already had been superseding everything else.

“Sweetheart…” he starts, but he trails off, unsure what he wants to say. He looks up as he hears her walking towards him and he sits back in his chair, allowing her room to sit on the edge of his desk.

“We’ll talk about how I don’t need you to protect me later,” she says, reaching for his hand and sandwiching it between both of hers, her touch careful as she runs her thumb back and forth over his damaged skin, “From both the people who say things about me and the things they say.”

“You’re going to be my wife,” he says, anger flashing through him again, feeling wrong and biting in comparison to her gentle touch, “And even if you weren’t…no one should speak about you like that,” he says, shaking his head as he looks up at her, “You’re…you’re everything.”

She presses her lips together and raises his hand to them, stamping a kiss against his damaged skin.

“You’re everything to me, honey,” she says, kissing his knuckles again, soft and diligent as if it would heal him instantly. On some level, he’s sure it does, “So I don’t want you to risk your job over the opinion of a guy like Clark.”

He nods and avoids her eye contact, “I’m sorry.”

She cups his cheek with her spare hand and makes him look at her, “You have nothing to be sorry for, baby,” she says, leaning forward and stamping her lips against his, “Only he does, and I think the broken nose is enough of a punishment,” her smile fades slightly as she chews her lip, clearly lost in thought and he squeezes her hand.

“What’s wrong, Em?”

She shakes her head, “Nothing’s wrong,” she assures him, “It’s just…Clark used to ask me out all the time. And he stopped when I came back from Paris. I kind of assumed it was because we got together so quickly but…” she laughs humourlessly as the scar on her abdomen burns, the phantom stake driving through it as she thinks about it, “I guess not. Not that it really matters, I’d never go there in a million years even if we weren’t together but…it just makes me wonder how many people are thinking the same thing.”

The anger he’d felt last night flashes through him again for a moment, hot and overwhelming as he feels it threaten to burst free, but it disappears as quickly as it came, his concern for her more important. They’d both been self-conscious of their respective scars their first night together, as if they didn’t already know the worst of what each other had been through. It had been a night of exploration, of soft touches and questions that they’d had for years answered. Ever since then, they’d barely acknowledged it, as comfortable with each other as someone could be with another person.

“You’re beautiful,” he says, shifting back so she can slip into his lap, his arms tight around her as she settles against him, her side pressing into his chest, “And he’s an idiot if he thinks what happened to you doesn’t make you even more so.”

She scoffs and smiles lovingly at him, pushing his hair from his forehead, “You��re my fiance, you have to say that.”

“It’s true,” he says, moving his hand so it rests on her abdomen, gently tracing the edges of the scar that lay beneath her clothes. Scar tissue spread out like a constellation, the slope of it a pattern he could follow with his eyes closed, “It’s made of you, so how could it be anything other than beautiful.”

She shakes her head and leans in to kiss him, her lips firm against his as she cups the back of his head, “I love you.”

“I love you too,” he replies, kissing her once more before she rests her head against his shoulder, content to sink into his embrace before the day truly begins, “I wonder when Strauss will be in here yelling at me about last night.”

“I think Dave got you out of that one,” she says, reaching for his hand and linking their fingers together, “He had a conversation with Clark and with Lewis,” she tilts her head to look up at him, “He said something about reminding Clark of his place.”

Aaron chuckles and kisses her forehead, “I’ll have to come up with a way to thank him.”

She smiles, and is briefly distracted as she sees Dave walking up the stairs and stopping just outside of Aaron’s office, clearly trying to be sneaky but failing. She nods towards him and Aaron sees him too, so she winks at him, a silent request to go along with what she was going to say.

“He’s already claimed the role of godfather for our firstborn in return for it,” she says, her smile getting wider as his does, the mention of their potential future child enough to get rid of any lingering anxiety in the air around them, “Poor kid doesn’t exist and they already have Dave as their moral guidepost.”

“I can hear you, you know.”

They both laugh at Dave’s weary voice coming through the window and Emily leans into Aaron’s side again as she replies, happy and content in his arms.

“I know, that’s why I said it, old man.”

-x-

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moonsgemini · 11 months

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seeking arrangements - i

summary: Lola's sister is getting married and the best man happens to be her cheating ex. In a desperate attempt to impress her family and show her ex she’s moved on with a hot date Lola turns to the advice of coworker pointing her towards the direction of a male escort. Rafe Cameron was the perfect man to take to any event for just $8,000. Her family won’t suspect a thing and when the wedding’s over they’ll never see each other again. Right?

warnings: escort!rafe x oc, mentions of a cheating ex, escort talk ??, fluff I think

wc: 4.1k

an: I love the movie the wedding date so I wanted to write a series based off of the idea, I hope you all enjoy this as much as I enjoyed writing it (:

series masterlist

Lola opened the door to her apartment shedding her rain coat and hanging it on her coat rack. The last of the May rain was really getting the best of her this year. She loved living in the city because it was walkable but she didn’t love it when it rained because she got soaked on her commute home. Her cat, Sailor, jumped down from the window sill of the living room and came to greet her rubbing her head against her legs purring lightly.

“Hi sweet girl, did you have a good day today?” Lola asked the black fluffy cat as she bent down and picked her up. Cradling her like a baby and kissing her face. Lola got lucky with a cuddly easy going cat. She felt like Sailor was her closest and most trusted friend.

She set Sailor down and walked over to her room with a content sigh. After changing into some comfy clothes and washing her makeup off she laid on her big grey couch. Her plans for the rest of the evening were to lay on her couch and get Chinese takeout, catch up on emails and watch her favorite show. Her favorite activities. After putting on friends as a little background noise she pulled her laptop out of her bag to check her emails. That’s when her memory of her morning at the office came back to her, her face flushed as she looked at the drafted email in front of her.

Rafe,

Hi my name is Lola and I’m in need of a date to a wedding. It’d be more than a date actually, I need a fake boyfriend in about two weeks for 5 days. It’ll be June 12th-17th in the Hamptons. My sister is getting married in the hamptons and my family is kind of nuts and obsessed with me getting a boyfriend. My ex boyfriend is also the best man in the wedding, and if it was like a regular break up it’d be fine but he cheated on me for over a year of our relationship so I want to show that I’ve moved on. I may seem desperate but I kind of am. Did I mention that I heard of you through a work friend whose cousin has a friend who hired you for some event. So if you’re interested please email me back and if you’re not then please forget I ever emailed you.

xx Lola

“oh God,” she muttered as she read it over. Did she sound desperate? maybe.

Eight months ago Lola’s sister Penny had called her squealing with excitement. She barely let Lola say hello before she was spilling the news about how her boyfriend, now fiancée, Harry had proposed to her. How he did it in the most romantic way while they were on vacation in Italy. It was hard for Lola to feel excited for her sister but she still put on an amazing act like always. All her life Penny had outshined and beat Lola in everything. She was the younger shining star that their mother put on a pedestal, little sister never did anything wrong. Penny won first place in science fairs, always got the boy, never had to try hard to get her dream job. It all seemed to come easy to her.

Three years ago Lola moved after graduating from college because she got an amazing job at a publishing office. She even got cute apartment and she felt like she was finally coming into her own. Penny came to the city when her and Harry were just friends to see him, of course seeing her sister wasn't her main priority. But she figured she’d kill two birds with one stone and invited Lola to dinner with them, where then Harry invited his best friend Thomas. They immediately hit it off and soon after he was her everything. She thought she’d be the first to get married, until two years into the relationship she found out the scum bag had been cheating on her for a year of the relationship. Lola was surprising him at work with lunch when this girl from his office crawled out from under his desk.

Ever since Penny had given her the news of the engagement she had face-timed or called Lola almost every week for the first few months whether it was about what flowers should be the center pieces or how many tiers should the cake be. Along with breaking the news that Thomas was going to be the best man, Penny just mentioned it in passing like it was no big deal. As if her sister's cheating ex wasn't going to be an important part of the wedding.

It was mentally exhausting but Lola couldn’t complain. It was her sister she had to help her and be there, she had to be a good big sister. Every time during those calls Penny would find a way to weasel in the question, “so do you have a date yet?” Lola hated that question. It was like Penny knew her sister couldn’t find a date. Every time Lola would say the same thing, “Not yet Pen.” Then she’d say, “I think Thomas is still bringing that girl from soho.” Almost as if she was trying to chip away at Lola’s finally mended heart. The last time Penny called about and asked that god forsaken question Lola blurted out a lie. “Actually yeah I-I’ve been seeing a guy for a few months but uh I didn’t want to invite him until I was sure about him.”

The lie came out almost too easy and she immediately regretted it. Where was she going to find a date. Especially someone who would want to spend 5 days with her crazy family. She had rested her head on her desk with a loud thud after she hung up the phone, catching the attention of Fiona.

“You good over there?” She asked peaking over at her coworker.

Lola lifted her head facing her, “I’m royally screwed.” She explained the situation to Fiona about the imaginary date she was taking.

“Who the hell am I going to find in a week,” Lola groaned tugging at her hair.

Fiona hummed in thought, “Okay you’re probably going to say no, but I may have a solution.”

Fiona explained how her cousin’s friend hired a male escort to go with her to a work party. The woman had been tired of going to work parties alone for the last few years and took matters into her own hands. The cousin’s friend had found him after he did a small anonymous segment in a magazine about male escorts. She knew the magazine’s editor and found the guy. Lola thought Fiona was crazy if she thought she would do that and immediately shut the idea down. But after some contemplation she timidly asked how she could get in contact with the guy, which led to the typing up of the email. She didn’t send it because she wasn’t sure if this would be a smart idea.

Lola read the drafted email over and over again, hovering the mouse over send. What could go wrong? A lot actually. Her whole family could find out and she’d be the laughing stock of the century. After that thought she definitely wasn’t going to send it. Maybe she could just go alone and tell her sister that her and mystery man broke up. As she was about to delete it Sailor jumped onto her lap and her fingers slipped and pressed down on send.

“Sailor! Fuck,” she gasped as she sat up, the cat getting off of her and standing on the ledge of the couch.

I guess there’s no turning back now, she thought to herself. She was honestly hoping he wouldn’t reply, but for some reason the rejection would make her feel worse.

Saturday’s were Lola’s favorite because she would go to her favorite deli and get a bagel, then head over to the farmers market. She had spent the whole night before refreshing her email with a glass of wine in hand waiting for Rafe’s reply

She was headed back home her shoulders carrying reusable bags filled with produce. Her favorite part of the day was over, but she couldn’t help but be anxious to get home and check her email. She hadn’t let herself check before she left the apartment or while she was at the market. It was 2pm now he has to have replied by now.

She made her way into her apartment unloaded the bags onto her kitchen counters before almost running to the living room where her laptop sat on the couch. Lola took a deep breath before opening her email, closing her eyes as her new messages loaded.

“Sailor this is your fault if he rejects me,” she muttered as the cat stared at her from the window sill. She looked back at her screen and the email with the subject title Hamptons Wedding staring at her. He had replied, her heart rate instantly picking up. She didn’t even know if this guy was good looking now that she thought about it. What if he ended up being some murderer? Before her racing mind took over she opened the email.

Lola,

It sounds like you’re in a sticky situation, so I’d like to help you out. Hopefully we can discuss all the details and the prices in person to get to know each other better. If you’re free this afternoon we can meet at Lucy’s in Manhattan at 6pm. Let me know if that works for you.

- Rafe

“Holy shit,” she gasped. Lola looked at the corner of her laptop at the time, 2:48pm.

Rafe,

That sounds great, I’ll see you then!

xx Lola

She quickly scrambled to her bathroom after sending her reply. It was her hair wash day and with about two and a half hours left to get ready she needed to start now.

As she was getting ready her mind was racing. What if he was ugly? But he did this for a living so she was sure that he had to be good looking. Hopefully not too out of her league or else how would her family believe her. How would Thomas believe her. What if Rafe thought she wasn’t pretty. Lola felt like she was getting ready for a blind date with the way she meticulously did her hair and winged her eyeliner. She had to keep reminding herself that this was just a business transaction, she didn’t need to impress him. Well maybe she did because he could totally reject her and turn down the idea.

When she was finally ready it was 5:21pm. She stared at herself in the mirror hoping her black dress and knitted cropped button up and boots looked good. She gave herself a small smile in the mirror and grabbed her bag. Kissing Sailor goodbye she headed out the door. The bar wasn’t too far from her apartment just a short 15 minute walk. She wore her headphones and listened to Taylor Swift trying to keep her mind elsewhere. Lola arrived to the bar and found a booth towards the back, she sat on the side facing the door so she could watch for her mystery man.

“Can you I get you anything to drink?” The waitress asked.

“Oh uh can I get a cosmo please,” Lola smiled politely. The waitress nodded and headed over to the bar.

Lola fidgeted with the rings on her fingers, eyes glued to the door. The door opened and a man walked through, probably just slightly taller than her with dark hair. Maybe this was him she thought as she sat up straighter, but he walked over to the other side of the bar greeting some other men who were already sat there. Her posture deflated a bit, maybe she was somehow being stood up. The waitress brought over her cosmo and she thanked her quietly. Taking a couple gulps to ease her nerves, almost finishing the whole drink.

The door to the bar opened once again and a tall man walked in. He was extremely handsome, chiseled features and dirty blonde hair. He was wearing a green button up and black jeans a silver chain around his neck. He stood at the front looking around until his eyes met Lola’s. He grinned and walked over to her. She couldn’t believe that this was Rafe, she felt like he was definitely out of her league.

“Hi, are you Lola?” Rafe asked even though he knew it was her. Her nervous demeanor and doe eyes definitely gave her away. His clients tended to have a certain anxious look to them, but she seemed different. She was also a lot younger than his usual clients, she seemed like she was his age but he was used to taking women in their 30s out. Rafe immediately thought she was pretty and he wondered how she couldn't find a real date to take.

“Hi yeah that’s uh me,” She smiled as she shook his outstretched hand. He sat down across from her and she really got a good look at him. He wasn’t just handsome he was hot. His eyes were blue and he had a bit of scruff as well as a bit of a mustache. His hair was parted down the middle his dirty blonde hair framing his face.

“So let’s talk business?” He asked breaking her out of her trance.

“Oh yeah, so I’ve never done anything like this ever. I just I really don’t want to go alone to this thing.”

He nodded, “Yeah that’s understandable, especially since you said your ex is the best man.” Rafe had been to a few weddings as a hired date but never one where his date was in the wedding party.

She raised her eyebrows and sighed, “Yeah just the icing on top of the cake. We were together for two years and I found him cheating on me with his coworker. I think he felt so guilty that he told me how he had been cheating on me for a year of our relationship because he felt like the spark had gone,” she laughed bitterly, “But the douche bag felt like faking it for a year with me would hurt less than a break up. I shouldn’t have dumped all of that on you.” She laughed cheek’s getting hot as she realized she’d told her tragic love story to some stranger.

“It’s fine, kind of what I’m here for. I’m sorry he treated you like that. No one deserves that. I'm also here to make sure he sees what he missed out on,” He smiled sincerely.

The waitress walked over, “Hi can I get you anything to drink?”

“Oh yeah can I just get a tequila soda,” he looked over at Lola’s empty glass, “and another one of whatever she’s having.”

“I’ll be right back with that,” she smiled.

“Before I give you a price or anything like that I just want to know a breakdown of the whole thing. I know you said five days in the Hamptons,” Rafe said folding his arms over the table. Lola couldn’t help but stare at his arms, it had been a while since she had been on a date so she couldn’t help but stare at the greek god in front of her.

Lola nodded, “Right, it’s five days and we’d be staying at my parents Hampton’s house. My dad’s a doctor and my mom is an interior designer, my mom is a bit of a nut,” she chuckled, “But uh there will be a cocktail party, rehearsal dinner, bachelorette and bachelor party, a couple of family barbecues, there’s this tradition where we all play baseball. Just a lot of events leading up to the actual wedding.”

Rafe was really fascinated by Lola, he could tell she was an anxious person. He could also tell she didn’t know exactly how beautiful she was and he had a feeling that may have something to do with her family.

“Sounds like pretty standard wedding stuff, I usually am just the date to the actual wedding but it all sounds fun,” he shrugged.

She shook her head, “You won’t be saying that after you have to hear my sister whine about every little thing and my mom hits on you after her sixth glass of wine.”

“I can handle drunk moms, I promise. For the five days it’d be $8,000. If you wanted to do any intimate stuff then that costs extra,” He couldn’t help the small smirk that formed on his lips. He knew that she was going to refuse the intimate stuff because she didn’t seem like the type but he kind of liked seeing her squirm.

“Oh no I’m good, I just don’t I won’t,” she stuttered with a flushed face, “I won’t need the extra.” Lola was a pretty good saver so the money wasn’t a problem for her, and as much as she hated to say it she was a bit of a trust fund kid.

He chuckled, “Okay, so you pay the day that we leave. We can get our story together now so that if any questions come up like how we met we can answer them.”

“Alright, so uh what’s our story?”

Rafe pursed his lips thinking for a second, “Uh we met here. You came in after work for a drink, I came up to you flirted and the rest is history. Our first date was at Romano’s and we’ve been together for six months?”

Lola nodded her head taking a sip of her new cosmo the waitress had just brought over, “What if they ask me about you? Like who you are what your job is?"

“I’m a real estate developer my company is Cameron Development. I have two sisters and I’m from North Carolina,” He took a sip of his drink. He didn’t know what he was giving her real details about his life but he felt like he could trust her. She had a warm aura to her that was pulling him in.

“How old you are? College? Favorite foods? Are you allergic to anything?” She asked nervously trying to get as much information as possible.

“Sweetheart they’re not gonna ask that much I promise,” he chuckled, “but I'm 25, I didn’t go to college my dad passed on the company to me. My favorite food is any pasta, I’m not allergic to anything. I also need to know some things about you, to make it fair.”

She sighed, “Right. Well I’m really boring. I'm 24 I grew up in New Jersey, I went to Syracuse and majored in english. I work at a publishing company and I have a cat named Sailor. I hate mushrooms and I’m allergic to bees.”

“Tell me more about your family,” He leaned back in his seat and she swore everything he did was just too attractive.

“So my sister, Penny, she’s the one getting married. She’s my younger and only sister. She’s always kinda been the golden child, her fiancée Harry is a nice guy despite who his friends are. My mom is nuts she prefers wine over water. My dad is the only one in my family who really sees me, he’s a great guy,” She smiled lightly, “Uh my cousin Tabitha is crazy but like the good kind, she’s always a good time I love her. Everyone else like my aunts and uncles are all kind of kooky.”

Rafe smirked, “Kooky eh? I think I can handle that. All seems like standard wedding guests.”

Lola started fidgeting with her rings, “I-I really can’t thank you enough for this. I’ve never done anything like this before. I just really hope we can convince people.”

“Lola you don’t have anything to worry about okay? I promise we’ll be convincing, I’m a professional remember. It’s my job to make you feel good about yourself and talk you up to your family,” He gave her a crooked smile, “Now I just need to hear more about this dick ex boyfriend.”

She pushed away the warm feeling in her stomach that rose when he said he was going to make her feel good, “Oh god. So uh he works in finance and he thinks he’s some big hot shot. When we broke up he immediately got with the girl he had been cheating on me with, I think he's actually taking her. He’s self obsessed and arrogant but I was too blind in love to see it. Someone had finally paid attention to me and I ate it up.”

“So definitely a grade A douche bag, we’ll make him jealous Lola.” Rafe reassured.

She nodded giving him a tight lipped smile. There had been a question itching at her to ask him, “so how did you start doing this?”

He laughed, “I’ve been waiting for you to ask, everyone always does. I uh kind of needed money and this girl from my hometown paid me two hundred bucks to take her to a Christmas party because she didn’t want to go alone. It sort of spiraled from there, but this isn’t my only job.”

“What else do you do?” She tilted her head curiously. He really didn’t need her to be doing cute things like that.

“That’s top secret, I don’t want to give out too much of myself for business reasons,” That was sort of a white lie because Rafe had in-fact told her what else he did but she didn’t need to know that Cameron Development was real.

“That’s understandable.”

After talking a bit more to get all their ducks in a row they left the bar, Rafe paying for their drinks despite Lola’s refusal. She was beginning to feel confident that they’d be able to pull this off. It was almost 10pm now as they walked side by side.

“How far do you live?” He asked looking over at her.

“It’s a fifteen minute walk,” She said looking up at him. Now that they were walking side by side she could really see their height difference. He was so much taller and broader than her, she felt light headed just thinking about it. Thomas had only been slightly taller than her.

“Let me walk you, it’s late.”

“Are you sure?”

“Positive sweetheart, I can’t let you walk home alone.” He smiled.

The walk was filled with small talk about Lola’s job and her cat. Rafe barely spoke about himself but she knew it was to keep himself as anonymous as possible. They reached her apartment a lot quicker than she’d liked. Not that she would actually admit that.

“This is me.”

“Alright well you have my number so text me any other details I need to know, I’ll be here to pick you up in about a week. I know you have some doubts and anxiousness about this whole situation so if you need some reassurance don’t be afraid to reach out to me, but I promise this will all be fine.” He smiled hoping to ease her nerves.

“Thank you Rafe, really. You have no idea how much this means to me.” She smiled.

“Just doing my job sweetheart.”

“I’ll see you in a weeks then, goodnight Rafe.” She said before walking up to her apartment with butterflies in her stomach at the pet name he had used.

“Night Lola,” He waved before walking off in the direction of his apartment.

Lola wasn’t really regretting accidentally sending that email anymore. She only slightly regretted it because she didn’t expect him to be so handsome and charming, she would easily get sucked in to something that wasn’t going to be real. But she’d do anything to not face her family and ex alone.

As Rafe walked home he couldn’t help but think about Lola. His clients were usually older women these days, he also didn’t take on as many as he used to. Lately taking random women out to Christmas parties, fourth of July barbecues, and weddings didn’t feel as good as it did when he was 20. When he got Lola’s email he felt himself drawn to her, she seemed sweet and truly hurting about something. She didn’t sound desperate in the way other women did, she sounded hopeful. Rafe knew he would be royally screwed if he didn’t get his head in the game.

#rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron imagine #rafe cameron series #rafe cameron #rafe cameron au #rafe cameron smut #rafe fanfiction #rafe fic #rafe cameron outer banks #rafe cameron fanfiction #rafe cameron x oc

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moonknightshifts13 · 8 months

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Fell Out of Love?

Pre-marriage Steven Grant + Jake Lockely x gender-neutral reader (Angst)

note: yeah, I felt like writing another one lol. This one kinda hurt me ngl. We love angst stories about the moon boys.

It’s been a few months since I last talked to Steven. The last time I saw him it was when we were picking out the color themes for our wedding. We went home and then that same night, I felt him get up from our bed and heard the door close. I didn’t think much of it since he’s still Khonshu’s avatar – not by choice though – we can blame that one on Jake, but we didn’t know at the time. A few days passed by and I didn’t think much of it, just thinking that whatever mission they were on was going to take a while. Those days turned into a week, then that week turned into a month, then that month turned into months. I messaged him more than once and called more than once.

“Steven, hun. When are you going to be back? We have our appointment for my dress fitting soon. Um, please call back.”

“Steven, it’s been a week now. I know Jake or Marc is probably fronting for the mission, but I’d appreciate it if you could come home just for the appointment. Love you”

“Steven, where are you? You missed the dress fitting appointment. It’s been a month. Is Khonshu keeping you guys longer? Please let me know so I don’t worry, love you Steven”

“Steven, please answer my calls and messages. I’m getting worried love. Are you boys okay? Did something happen? Please call me back when you can…I love you”

Eventually, I stopped calling and messaging as every call was never answered and every message was left on delivered. At some point, I started to question whether Steven was ever going to come back…that was until today.

I sat on the bed as I was writing emails when I heard the front door open. My heart immediately raced, and I quickly jumped out of the bed, leaving my computer behind. As I walked towards the bedroom door, it opened, and Steven was there. He looked at me and he looked tired, beyond tired. I stared at him with concern and guilt.

“Steven, what happened? Are you hurt? Why did you guys take so long? Are Marc and Jake okay? Where were yo-”

“Stop”

I looked at him confused and stunned by his stern voice. Steven avoided looking at me and he just looked off to the side.

“What- Steven, love… what happened-”

“Stop calling me that…”

“What?”

Steven looks at me, but it’s not Steven…it’s Jake. I look at Jake even more confused and concerned,

“Oh, Jake…I didn’t know, I’m sor-”

“Steven doesn’t want to marry you.”

I don’t process the words he’s said until I see his facial expression turn sour. My heart drops and my expression turns into a pained one.

“What? No- no, you’re lying. Steven would’ve told me- he would’ve told me Jake!”

“He didn’t want to hurt you, so he told me to tell you. We’re just here to get our things and leave”

I shake my head and tears start to form in my eyes. Jake walks past me and he gets his duffel bag from out of the closet, turning around and starting to pack their clothes. I shake my head again and I grab onto Jake’s jacket.

“No, no, no- please. Please, tell me why he doesn’t want to marry me! Please Jake, you can’t do this to me- he can’t do this to me. What did I do wrong? We can talk about it, please-”

“There’s nothing to talk about, he doesn’t want to marry you. End of the story”

“Jake, please- let me talk to Steven! Just let me talk to me and we can figure this ou-”

“Como chingas- HE DOESN’T LOVE YOU ANYMORE, OKAY?! HE FELL OUT OF LOVE!”

I freeze and I just stare at Jake with teary eyes. Jake looks at me for a second, a flash of hurt evident but it goes away. He turns away from me and he keeps packing their clothes. I let go of Jake’s jacket sleeve and I turned away from him.

“You don’t have to pack, I’ll get my stuff and leave when you guys aren’t here”

Jake freezes and he turns to look at me, but I’m facing away from him. He opens his mouth to say something but nothing comes out. I let my tears stream down my cheeks but no sounds come out. I go to the closet and I grab my bag, I turn to the bedroom door and I exit the bedroom. I hear Jake’s footsteps follow along as I make my way towards the front door.

“y/n…wait-”

“Goodbye Jake…tell Steven that I love him…I love you all, dearly. I’m sorry that I wasn’t enough for him”

I say softly and faintly as I leave through the front door and close it behind me. Jake just stares at the front door, now regretting his decision on interfering with Steven and I’s relationship. He didn’t think that I would actually leave, just like that. Well, how was I supposed to stay with someone who “fell out of love” with me? Little did I know that this was part of Jake’s plan. His plan to protect his brothers. His plan to make sure that I didn’t hurt sweet, innocent Steven’s heart. His plan to get rid of me, not knowing that Steven would never talk to him ever again. Not knowing that the one who hurt Steven’s heart was him: for chasing me away and telling me lies about Steven. Steven, yelling and shouting at Jake in his head for chasing me away, for telling me a lie about him falling out of love with me. Steven, telling Jake that he would never forgive him for ruining his marriage. Jake not knowing that Steven would no longer front nor make appearances ever again. He didn’t want to risk having Steven get hurt, yet he was the one to cause Steven’s pain and end his marriage.

#moon knight #angst moon knight #moon knight x reader #steven grant x reader #jake lockely x reader #angst #this lowkey kinda hurt #angsty #angsty with no happy ending #moon knight fanfic

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royal-ruin · 9 months

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red, white, and royal blue (rwrb) fic recs (part 4)

other rwrb fic recs here other fic recs here personal favorites are starred, by the way. everything is complete unless stated otherwise.

since the first 3 were well-liked, here are a few more of my favs.

*Turning of the Season by indomitablelove (~5k)

‘What’s going on, Philip?’ And then, Philip slumps. His head falls into his hands and his back curls in on itself, his palms cover his face and he pinches at the bridge of his nose. When he looks up at Henry again, he looks like a different man, broken. ‘I have to know,’ he says quietly. Henry's brow furrows. ‘I have to know who it was,’ Philip says. A few weeks after the emails, Henry and Philip talk, and Henry looks forward.

it broke my heart most how philip was henry's enemy in the book, i just wanted some wholesome sibling feels (bea's the absolute best!), so this is a little fix-it, i guess. post-canon btw.

Redemption by MaryaDmitrievnaLikesSundays (~3.5k)

Bea sighed. She looked just like how Philip felt: drained, angry, and exhausted. ”What if you had never been allowed to marry Martha?” She asked. “What if you’d been forced to sneak around, and suddenly, in spite of how hard you worked to keep it quiet, you’re both in a load of trouble for it, and everyone is screaming at you, and she is crying to you and you can’t even comfort her because you’re still not allowed? How do you think you’d feel then?” Philip was silent for a long, long moment. Bea gave him one more glance as she opened the door to the dining room. ”Read the e-mails, Philip. And try to understand.” Or, Philip says some very bad things, does some very bad things, reads the e-mails, and finally, finally, finally understands.

another philip does better fic. warning for homophobia at the beginning, please please please always read the tags.

I can't breathe, if you're not there by softcinnamonroll (~2k)

One moment, Alex was laughing at some joke Henry had made, and then the next there was a loud noise from the TV and the livestream cut out, leaving Alex alone in their dark living room. At first, Alex was sure there had just been a power cut, or some technical difficulties that caused the stream to cut out, but then the messages and BREAKING NEWS notifications started pouring in. BREAKING NEWS: Explosion at Prince Henry of Wales Charity Event. Casualties Unknown.

read the tags please, it has some things that may be triggering.

Powerless by floatingaway4 (~3k)

“Do you know what I’ve had to put up with in the last twelve hours?” Henry wants to point out that in that same twelve hours he’s had his body sliced open and an organ removed, but this doesn’t seem to be the time. He also got to sleep through his experience, while Alex was very much awake while dealing with Henry’s family. And Henry got the nice drugs, while Alex looks like he could use a drink.

sex ed in 6 steps by coffeecatsme (~9k)

“Please tell me you used a condom, Fox,” Alex drawls out, leaning against the wall, and Henry chokes on his next breath. “Excuse me?” “You’re gonna tell me all about this tomorrow, but for the love of God, tell me you used a condom and we won’t have mini Henrys on campus anytime soon.” Or, 5 times Alex thinks Henry's straight and 1 time he finds out the truth. Or, 5 times Alex jokes about Henry's sex life and 1 time he gets to be a part of it.

college au where they are roommates and alex is oblivious.

Let's Finish What We've Started by andrealyn (~16k)

When Alex fell in love with Henry, his dreams changed into something new -- still bright, still exciting. Eight years on, Alex is running for the Senate and taking those steps to achieve those dreams, but something feels off in his marriage and Alex can't really explain if it's in his head or whether he and Henry actually have a problem. In the midst of a busy campaign, eager to show Texas what he can do, Alex also has to ask himself -- is it all worth it if Henry isn't at his side?

future fic.

If you feel the way I do by everwitch (~2k)

It's apparently true, what they say about soulmates. Once your sixteenth birthday has passed and you find yourself in their presence, close enough for your soulbond to come alive, you'll be able to feel it. You'll simply know. Henry knows, all right. He opens his eyes, his heart beating madly in his chest as he looks across the cafeteria. His gaze is drawn to a presence that he can feel so completely, now, almost like it's become part of himself, like a piece he's been missing. He blinks, slowly, as he meets the wide eyes of another boy. It's Alex Claremont-Diaz. Henry's breath hitches. Fuck. Oh, fuck.

high school soulmate au, it's super cute.

*she's a (rock & roll survivor) by loyaulte_me_lie (~3k)

"Good for you," Stevie Nicks says, "the world needs more rock and roll princesses." // the (un)making of Beatrice Fox Mountchristen Windsor.

BEA NEEDS MORE SCREEN TIME. tell me why this had me sobbing at 1 pm. i adored her before, but this fic made her so heartbreakingly human, i can't help but love her now.

#red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue movie #rwrb fic recs #rwrb fanfiction #rwrb fanfic #rwrb movie #rwrb #alex claremont diaz #henry fox mountchristen windsor #royal's rwrb fic recs

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barbex · 8 days

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@breninarthur, I have no idea what happened to your ask, it has gone poof. But luckily I still have the email. Thank you for the prompt for @dadrunkwriting! Have little zevistair fic.

---

Alistair tries to loosen the stiff collar of his shirt without being too obvious about it. But of course, that thing is like a plank of wood, bleached and starched to the point of not being fabric anymore, and it pokes into his skin. How he hates this, all of this. It's not just the collar, it's the heavy coat, the tight trousers, the layers upon layers of richly decorated, heavy fabric draped all over his body indicating a status he doesn't feel he deserves.

He catches a raised eyebrow from Anora and drops his hands to his sides. Caught again. They may only be married on paper, but she definitely has her eyes on him. His gaze flees from Anora's glare to the other side of the room and gets caught on quite another set of eyes.

Amusement twinkles around the corners of Zevran's eyes as he raises his glass towards him. Alistair is about to rush forward, but someone, some noble lady and her annoying wife, step in his way, pinning him in a conversation about landrights and dalish elves. It's a conversation he keeps having, every five minutes or so it seems. As he rattles off the information about the reinstatement of rights and the office for land disputes, open every day of the week except on Sunday, he watches Zevran stroll along the cold buffet.

Occasionally, he picks something off the plates, looking at Alistair as he pops a morsel in his mouth. Then he moves to the desserts, taking a tiny bowl of iced fruit foam. He watches Alistair intensely, turning fully towards him as he dips his tongue into the foam, slowly.

Alistair stops talking in the middle of a sentence, just staring at Zevran, licking that sinful stuff. He can't take this. "Please excuse me," he mumbles, parting the crowd like an angry bull as he stomps over the dancefloor to Zevran.

"But, your Highness!" someone calls after him.

He ignores it, he has a mission. "Zevran." He's out of breath, as if he had to cross half of the Deep Roads to reach his love.

"Yes, my king?" Zevran licks another deep gorge into the frozen cream in the bowl, not hiding his grin.

"Come." Alistair grabs Zevran's arm and pulls him behind him, ignoring the gasps and titterings as he drags him into a servant hallway.

"You're causing a scandal, my king." Zevran's complaint would be more convincing if he wouldn't laugh like a schoolboy. To see him laugh like this, with ease and joy like he does so rarely, makes Alistair's heart jump in his chest.

As the door falls closed behind them, Alistair spins Zevran around until his back hits the wall, very aware that Zevran is letting this happen, when he could easily side step Alistair's clumsy movements. "A scandal would have been what I want to do to you right now."

Smiling at him, Zevran widens his stance and pulls Alistair closer. "I can hardly wait, my dear warden."

Alistair presses his nose into Zevran's neck, breathing him in. "Zev, I missed you so much."

"And I you, Alistair," Zevran says with a soft voice. "I didn't mean to distract you —"

"Yes, you did." Alistair straightens, trying to look intimidating but obviously failing because he just can't stop smiling.

"Guilty as charged," Zevran whispers against his lips, carefully kissing him. "Seeing you with all these fine people..."

"Terrible people, vipers, all of them."

"Still, they get to be close to you," Zevran says, sliding his fingers into Alistair's hair. "When I can just watch."

"They will never get as close as you, that I can promise." Alistair wraps his arms around Zevran's slender form and lifts him up. "And I want you much closer right now and I'm not waiting anymore." He throws Zevran over his shoulder and kicks the door open to the hallway.

"I am certain I can walk." Zevran shakes with laughter.

Alistair huffs as he climbs the stairs up to the royal chambers. "At least for once, I want to feel useful."

"Then, by all means, carry on." Zevran's hands wander over Alistair's back. "I'm looking forward to divest you of these clothes."

"You and me, my love. You and me."

#dadrunkwriting #zevistair #Zevran x Alistair #Zevran #Alistair Theirin #zevistair fic #dragon age fanfiction #dragon age

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aita-blorbos · 7 months

Note

AITA for avenging my brother?

hiiiii ^^ so im (30, let's say M for convenience's sake) am currently the leader of a very big sect, which was Not the plan WhatSoEVER (i'll get into it). i was born as the younger sibling to the sect heir, which meant i had free reign to basically do whatever i wanted while he got the responsibilities and stuff! great deal methinks. our father died when we were both still young due to heart issues that run in the family and also being killed. since my brother had a decade or so on me, he pretty much raised me from then on while also having the new role of official sect leader on his shoulders.

again, seems like a good deal! he was strict, and really really insisted i practiced my fighting skills (like that wasn't the literal cause of our family's heart issues) to the point that one time he like kind of burned my paper fan collection in front of me but that's like it's all besides the point okay he loved me and i loved him and we were both there for each other okay? okay

anyway he had this servant/best friend/pretty sure somethingsomething was going on there. he was kind of like a second big brother to me. our interests overlapped and he also preferred stuff like art and poetry over fighting. he understood me in a way that my brother couldn't, and he helped raise me just as much, even accompanying me to my third year of summer courses. which lol was supposed to be a one year course but i failed twice. lmao w/e

things got... bad. a war broke out, the servant betrayed us by letting a dangerous enemy out of his cell, and he and my brother had a horrible fight that ended in the former's expulsion from our sect. fast forward yadda yadda this isn't so much the part of the story it's just context but basically that turned out to be a plan to get close to the enemy sect leader so he could stab him in the back. which turned out to become a recurring theme.

the servant, now a prominent figure in his own sect, my brother, and one basically-a-celeb from another sect became this big trio (and totally a Thing) because of the role they played in ending the war. servant-now-big-boy (let's go with snbb for convenience) used that position to send my brother into a cardiac arrest by playing a melody that was supposed to soothe him differently.

so now i was alone, and with one of the current biggest sects to lead, while all i wanted to do is look cute, paint and be bisexual. you can probably imagine how i felt when i learned who did it, especially considering how not only no one else knew, but he got /rewarded/ for it by becoming a sect leader himself. soooo i got a little silly and here's where i mighttttt be tah :3

basically i started a 10+ years revenge plan. i didn't really plan a /lot/ of it, but i knew i'd have to resurrect one of my childhood friends for it to grab attention away from me etc and such and so on and so forth. but basically i also got a gay and socially rejected teenager killed for that, desecrated the corpse of snbb's mother, paid some people to spread rumours here and there, possibly killed a few cats to lure a group of people where i needed them to be, and adopted a public persona of a useless idiot who couldn't run a sect for the life of me to keep suspsicions off of me for the duration of this, which was Also a part to get back at him because that meant he, as someone responsible and sooo niceys and oh won't you please help your poor little meowmeow with the big scary emails plssss (he basically ran the sect for me lol).

to top it all off i had him killed by the one person that loved him the most (mister sir basically-a-celeb. god his jawline is stronger than my will to live) (he has gone into seclusion and is isolating himself indefinitely to mourn)

but also all this allowed my old bestie to get gay married with his longtime heartthrob

so. aita?

#aita #am i the asshole #unreality #animal death

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dragon-kazansky · 2 years

Text

I get a kick out of you

Tom ‘Iceman’ Kazansky x Reader

Platonic! Pete ‘Maverick’ Mitchell x Reader

[Masterlist]

[Previous Chapter] - [Next Chapter]

Warnings: Ice’s health is getting worse. I don’t specify what it is, but just a heads-up if you find it hard to read about declining health.

30 years later and Maverick is back in Top Gun. This time to teach it. It’s his turn to deal with his past, but it’s going to be OK. You’re there to help him. Both of you have someone to look out for.

Admiral Tom Kazansky and yourself are still going strong. Married life is treating you well, but his health is taking a turn. Tom wants to do his best by Pete, but some things are out of his hands.

They both need you now more than ever.

Word count: 2.5k

Chapter Eight - In sickness and in health

♡♡♡

You fussed over Tom from the moment you sent him to bed. You had him change in his pyjamas and get in bed, telling him off if he dared look at his emails on his phone, which you confiscated at one point. You told him he could have it back if someone important called, but other than that, you kept it hidden away.

When you came to bed, he was still awake. He had been reading a book he kept on his bedside table. He looked up from its pages when you came in, smiling at you softly as you got ready for bed. You climbed in and tucked into his side.

“How are you doing?” You asked, keeping your voice no higher than whisper.

He closes his book and turns to you.

“I’m fine,” he tells you. Though the roughness to his voice tells you he’s been coughing again. You frown.

“Tom, please be honest with me.”

“I am. I’m fine.”

Your eyes flicker between his, trying to pick up on any sign of him just telling you that for your sake, but you don’t see anything. He seems to be genuine with you, which shouldn’t surprise you. Tom never lied to you. He was always open about things, which was a boundry you both set after what happened in the past.

“Alright.”

You kiss him on the cheek, letting your lips linger there for a bit. His eyes close and he smiles softly at the feel of your lips on him. When you pull away, his cheek feels cold without your touch.

He turns and watches you get settled in the bed, as you did every night. You normally, when he decides to read in bed, turn over and get comfortable, allowing him the space to read quietly some more, but tonight he didn’t feel like it. He moved the book back to the table and turned out his light, getting comfortable.

You feel his arm drape over your waist and pull you closer to him. You smile softly as you move yourself, getting comfy next to him. His lips brush against your shoulder.

“I love you,” you hear him whisper.

You smile to yourself.

“I love you too, Tom.”

You know then he’ll sleep soundly. Well, he normally would.

Tom’s health hadn’t been great for some time, but it had been at a level that wasn’t too worrisome, but the coughing had been a lot today. It only got worse during the night.

You’re not sure what time it was. Still pitch-black outside. You didn’t feel him leave the bed, but you could faintly hear the sink running. You didn’t worry too much, as it wouldn’t be the first time one of you got up for a drink in the middle of the night. It was when you heard his coughing as he came back that you sat up and turned to the door.

Your husband comes back into the bedroom with a half full glass of water. He doesn’t realise you’re awake right away, focusing on closing the door and getting back into bed. As he pulls the covers back over him, you turn to face him. Tom lifts a hand to his mouth as he coughs again.

“Do you need anything?” You ask.

He startles, having not known you were awake. He waits for the coughing to stop, shaking his head in the meantime.

“No,” he says, but his voice sounds all the worse now. You sit up and place a hand on his back, rubbing circles there. He takes some deep breaths and gathers himself again. Tom leans into your touch, and you’re quick to wrap your arms around him.

You don’t care that’s some stupid hour of the morning, Tom needed you.

When he feels a bit more comfortable, you both lay down in the bed, but you keep your arm around him. You can’t see his eyes, but you just know he’s looking at you.

“I love you,” you whisper into the dark.

Soft lips press against your forehead.

“I love you too,” he whispers back.

No more words are shared for the rest of the night. You run your fingers through his hair until you know he’s fallen back asleep. Sleep doesn’t come back to you easily.

In the morning, he’s still asleep when you wake. You lay there and watch him for a little while, thoughts running through your head. Worry has set itself in your heart. The man you love is suffering in front of you, and you’re worried it’s only going to get worse.

You get up and decide to make a start on breakfast.

The house is quiet when your family aren’t visiting. Though you have no doubt they’ll be around later. Right now, you’ll focus on giving your husband something wonderful to start his day with.

The plan was to cook him breakfast and bring it to him in bed, but by the time you’re dishing it up, he had woken up, got up, got dressed, and come downstairs. You turn to see him enter the kitchen with the glass he used last night for his water.

“You’re supposed to be resting!” You scold him, glaring at him softly.

Tom doesn’t look the least bit apologetic as he smiles at you and puts the glass in the sink behind you. He stands close, grinning at you with his handsome smile. You lose the glare and chuckle at him.

“Tom, you need rest.”

“I will rest, later.”

You roll your eyes and kiss him. His hands settle on your hips as he kisses you, loving having his hands on you. You have to give him a soft push with your hands on his chest to get him to stop. He chuckles against your cheek. You know he would happily stand there kissing you all over if he wanted to.

“Behave,” you say, trying not to smile.

“Never,” he replies, winking at you.

“Eat your breakfast, Admiral,” you tease, patting his arm and walking around him to get your breakfast ready too.

Tom laughs softly as he takes his plate and heads over to the table.

He seems fine while you both sit down and eat. You both talk a little, eat, drink some juice, laugh a bit. It’s not until you’re clearing up that he coughs into his fist again. You stop what you’re doing to look at him.

“Tom...”

He shakes his head.

He won’t admit anything is wrong because he hates making you worry, but it doesn’t matter anyway. You are worried. He hasn’t been this bad since the first time he got sick. That was so long ago now.

You clear the plates and keep your back to him as you wash up.

Tom watches you from the kitchen table. You’re trying so hard to not let your worry show, but he can tell you’re crying quietly to yourself over there. He gets up slowly, making his way to the sink. He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you, pulling you into his chest.

He hears the sob that escapes your lips.

“Let me call your doctor,” you say, keeping your voice quiet.

He’s silent for a moment, but then he replies just as quietly, “alright.”

Tom holds you a little while longer. You finish up your task, dry your hands, and then go and give his doctor a call. While you do that, Tom sits in his office, looking out his window.

He knows he’s not well. He knows it’s getting worse.

He can’t hide it.

He can’t deny it.

Tom doesn’t want to think about the worst-case scenario. About what will happen to Maverick if he gets worse. About his children. About you. He can see your heart breaking right in front of him, and if he doesn’t recover again this time, it will surely shatter your heart into pieces.

Tom wants to take away all that worry and sadness from you.

He wants you to be happy and loved by him forever.

You open the door to his office quietly, poking your head into the room. He still hears the door open and turns his head in your direction. You walk over to him, reaching your hand to him. Tom takes it when you’re close enough, bringing to his lips.

“He’s coming up to see you today.”

Tom nods, wordlessly.

You can’t help the tears from coming again as you look at him. Tom pulls you into his lap quietly, wrapping his arms around you. He hates it when you cry. He pulls you close enough to kiss your cheek, wanting you as close as possible.

“Don’t cry,” he says.

“I can’t help it. I hated watching you become sick in the first place, and now it’s happening all over again. Tom, they told us it could be so bad if you got like this again. I can’t.... I don’t... I...”

Tom stops you from talking by pulling you into a hug. You wrap your arms around his neck and bury your face into his shoulder.

“I’ll be fine, you’ll see.”

You want to believe his words. He spoke them so confidently, but the worry hasn’t faded.

You sit with him like that for a short while before leaving him. You had tried to get him to go back to bed, but he refused. Knowing he wouldn’t do that, you left him in his office, letting him catch up with anything he missed yesterday. You had given him his phone back, but even then, he had put it away until now.

Tom’s doctor came by a couple hours later.

Tom was still in his office when you brought the doctor up. You stood by the door as the doctor went in and greeted your husband. Tom looked at you.

“You can stay,” he said.

You shook your head.

“I’ll get out of the way for now... Leave you both to it. I... I’ll go make your tea,” you said, heading out.

Tom watched you go.

The door to the office shut quietly behind you and Tom turned his eyes to the floor. He wanted to hold your hand and tell you everything was fine, but you had called his doctor for a reason. You were scared.

Tom turns back to the doctor when his name is spoken.

You watch the water boil as you wait. You grip the kitchen counter hard. You fear the worse. The warning last time that if he got sick again, it could be severe, you weren’t ready to hear that, never mind see it happen.

You loved Tom more than anything.

If you lost him....

You debate calling Pete, looking at your phone on the counter, but that might be a little immature. The doctor was only examining him, there was nothing set in stone yet. For all you knew, this was nothing but a cough that would clear up in a few days. But with how bad it sounded, and the affect it had on his voice when he was done coughing, you wondered. You worried.

All you seem to do is worry over him.

The water is boiled. You make his tea. You take your time putting his tea set together on a tray to take up to him. You walk slowly back up to his office.

You take your time.

Standing outside his door, you hesitate for a moment. You had given them some time, but you wondered if you would be disturbing them if you went in now. You were about ready to turn and leave, giving them more time, but the door opened, and you looked up to see the doctor standing there.

“He said you might be out here,” the doctor smiled.

You chuckle softly and step inside the office. Tom turns in his chair to look at you, offering you a smile. You return the smile and set the tray on his desk, but he doesn’t even glance at it. He reaches out and holds your hand.

“I think you should stay,” the doctor says to you.

You glance at him and then at your husband. Seeing the look on Tom’s face, you nod once and sit down, letting Tom hold your hand.

“What is it?” You ask, seeing the look on the doctor’s face.

“It’s not great news, I’m afraid,” he tells you.

You give Tom’s hand a squeeze as you try to keep calm. Tom doesn’t take his eyes off of you as you listen to the doctor. He’s not worried about him. He’s worried about you.

“Tell me.”

“Your husband’s health has worsened. The coughing is an early sign, but you knew this from last time.”

You nod your head.

“The good news is, he could recover from this, but there is a high chance he will get worse. From what I have gathered from my examination, his body has taken a much more severe hit this time around. I would hope that you only have to deal with the coughing, Mr Kazansky, but I fear you may feel much more than that. You may grow tired quickly, lose some of your strength, if your coughing gets any worse, you may do some damage to your throat. You may feel dizzy and nauseous if you stand up too long.”

You have to close your eyes and take some deep breaths.

Tom brings your hand to his lips and kisses it again.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t guarantee anything. I fear this may get worse. If it does, you must contact me. There is a high chance this will be life threatening if this goes beyond the coughing.”

You can’t do it anymore.

You cover your mouth as tears fall.

You didn’t want to hear that.

The doctor gives you a moment as Tom pulls you into his arms and holds you. You fall against him, unable to brave face it anymore. No one wants to hear there’s a chance you’ll lose the one person you love.

Tom is the one to see the doctor out while you sit in his office staring at his desk.

The tea is cold now, but Tom doesn’t care. When he sees you sitting there, his heart aches. He walks over to the chair you’re sitting in and crouches down, taking your hands in his.

You turn your eyes to him.

“You’re not allowed to be sick...” You say, kind of teasing, but unable to laugh at your own words.

However, Tom smile at you softly.

“I’m sorry, darling.”

You lean forward and wrap your arms around his neck. Tom catches you and hugs you tight. You bury your face in his shoulder, hiding away from the world.

“You have to get better,” you mumble.

Tom doesn’t say anything, he just looks at the wall behind you as he holds you.

You know you’ll have to tell the children about this at some point, but you’ll tell them later. You’ll make an excuse for them not to visit today, wanting to be alone with Tom for now. You need time to think.

Tom agrees with this idea, because though he has a family to look after should the worst happen, he is more worried about you in this moment.

“Don’t leave me,” you whisper softly in his ear.

Tom swears his heart just broke.

“Not if I can help it,” he replies.

You fear what the future has in store for you both.

♡♡♡

@callsignscupcake - @topgun-imagines - @sitkafay - @theghostofshadows - @shianshian4315 - @mischief-siriusly-managed - @sarahissilent - @mackycat11 - @alphabetsalad - @byebyebreezywrites - @nyx2021 - @alanadetigy - @luckyladycreator2 - @fxngsfxgxrty - @snubug - @almondtofu1 - @criminalmindsandmarvel - @jakexfmc - @marchingicenotes7 - @mavericksicybabe - @some-lovely-day - @poppet05 -

#iceman kazansky #tom iceman kazansky #iceman x reader #iceman #tom kazansky #tom kazansky x reader #top gun #top gun: maverick #head in the clouds #i get a kick out of you #sequel

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persephonescottage · 1 year

Text

EXES PAST: Year 3.

Pairing: Billy RussoxFem!Reader.

Summary: Corrupt Benjamin March.

Warning: References to sexual situations, violence, blood, mutilation, trauma, swearing, obsessive thoughts, possessiveness, kidnapping, stalking, manipulation, violence, gaslighting and other triggers I will include as we go along, please only read if you’re 18+.

If any of this warnings trigger you please don’t read.

Gift giving, hot cocoa and pine trees everywhere. Billy wasn’t a big fan of the holidays but if it meant he’d see you at the Castle’s Christmas party he was all in.

Even if his baseball team lost and now he had to wear the stupid sweater Karen got him last year.

As soon as he stepped in the Greenwich house he looked for you, the warmth blushing his face, still some snow on the shoulders of his coat from the outside weather.

“I can’t believe you’re here!” Karen said excited jumping to hug him and Billy knew she had a little too much eggnog already. “I thought you wouldn’t come cause of the sweater. Oh my God look at the sweater!”

She points as she rambles to Frank who is next to her and Billy looks down at his outfit. A red sweater with a three dimensional Christmas wreath and a plush reindeer coming out of it.

He couldn’t even turn sideways safely without knocking someone over with it and God knows he wasn’t gonna let anybody know it sang jingle bells if you pressed the nose.

“I hate you.” He said simply taking his his coat off.

“No you don’t! You love me, that’s why you’re wearing it.” She smiled.

“Well I’m a man of my word.”

“Come on in.” Frank said this time, his lips in a line trying not to giggle “Let’s get you drunk so you’ll let us press the nose.”

As he followed his friends he scanned the room. Karens news paper friends and some old marines popped from the corners of the home but not you.

“She did come.” Frank whispers to him as soon as they reach the kitchen island that’s covered in half drunk bottles and people mingling around.

“I don’t know who you’re talking about.” Billy smiles in complicity.

“Sure Bill.” Franks sarcasm makes Billy laugh “She’s outside with her boyfriend, he’s a smoker.”

Oh right, the boyfriend.

Billy had learned his lesson with the lizard king, you would never surprise him with a boyfriend ever again.

Keeping tabs on you was complicated, you were a social butterfly but thankfully he had a never drying fountain of gossip in Karen and he’d often got Frank to grumpily drop tips on you.

He also hacked your phone, email and social media.

Again, you’d never catch him off guard and this was a fun one to crack.

Benjamin March was a well known man around New York. Partner in one of the city’s top legal firms he had made a name for himself with a file of high profile clients. Most of them politics and men of influence.

And he would always win.

Red flag number one.

He married a former Miss North Carolina whom he divorced about a year before and who he left practically on the streets alleging a horribly balanced prenup.

Poor girl, at least she was pretty.

Red flag number two.

Late night at his office after ANVIL was completely empty a few nights before Billy tried to convince himself he’d only intervene in your relationship if Benjamin March had all three strikes against him.

As if he really needed a single reason to murder a man just to get you all to himself.

Luckily for Billy he found the third strike, and it was a big one. The big kahuna of dirt he had now saved in a usb drive that was burning his pants pocket.

He couldn’t wait.

His hands vibrating with anticipation when you walked inside all by yourself, taking a shot Karen offered you on sight.

“Nice sweater Bill.” You press your lips together trying not to laugh and he smiles at you.

It’s all he can do.

“Merry Christmas angel. Not following the rules I see.” He says pointing at your outfit. “We agreed, no mini skirts. They make me nervous and you know it.”

“Well we also said no cozy looking sweaters.” You can’t hide the laugh after the sarcastic comment.

“If this makes you horny you have some serious issues.”

His laugh is interrupted by a man about a foot taller than you. His arm twisting around your torso in a possessive way.

There’s a fruity smell lingering from him and Billy wants to puke.

This man vapes?

As if he needed a fourth red flag, he thinks.

Billy introduces himself, a proud smirk on his face when Benjamin admits he already knows who he is, reassuring his status.

It takes a while before Karen pulls you to her, the motion lifting your skirt a little too much for Billy’s sanity and then you disappear with the blonde off to meet some of her friends.

It even feels orchestrated when somehow he is left alone in the kitchen with Benjamin March, the closes person holding their drunken state on a column of the dining room.

But Billy isn’t worried about Karen’s drunken co-workers and he wastes no time on handling the lawyer the usb from his pocket, releasing the speech of accusations he had prepared.

It’s not surprising when the man doesn’t deny Billy’s accusations.

Benjamin March had been helping elite men get away with fraud, murder and other crimes that made Billy’s stomach turn.

But he didn’t look remotely sorry.

Maybe a little sorry he had been caught when Billy hands him the incriminating proof, it’s all there, pictures, documents and audios, served in a silver platter that can lock the lawyer up for a long time.

Billy isn’t sure he’d ever been more offended than when Benjamin offers him money for his silence.

As if he wanted his disgusting money.

“What do you want then?” Benjamin seems more annoyed than worried.

“I want you to break up with her.”

“Fuck man! You went through all this trouble for some pussy?” He mocks.

He has no idea.

“You got a deal. She’s all yours.”

He agrees without even thinking twice and Billy wants to break his jaw for talking about you as something so disposable.

They fine tune the details and Billy wishes to tell him he has no interest in pursuing his downfall after he breaks up with you. Then he’ll become just another corrupt lawyer in New York City and he couldn’t care less.

And when March finally decides to leave he makes sure he makes himself even more punchable.

“Hit me up if you ever need a lawyer.”

“Maybe you should have some water angel.”

Did he tell Benjamin March to break up with you?

Yeah.

Did he tell him to do it right now at this very party in front of other people?

No!

For a lawyer he had no common sense and now Billy had a very drunk girl half crying half laughing on the Castle’s couch.

He eyed you quickly, trying to miss the way your legs shine under the low lights of the home when the red skirt you wore rises up.

He couldn’t tonight. You were drunk and sad and he didn’t want you like this but you seemed determined to get him though.

“Man I really was smart with the no sweater rule. You look so cute!”

He looks down at the cursed sweater wanting to laugh with you, but you don’t, you seem serious about it.

You’re holding what seems to be your tenth shot of tequila and giving him those flirty eyes he often saw in his head during his jerk off sessions.

There’s barely anyone left at the party and it would be so easy to get you in one of the rooms and lift that tiny scrap off fabric you call an outfit.

Stop.

There’s a big red stop sign going on loop in his head, not only was this his best friends home, your cheeks were bright pink from the intoxication and life was so unfair to him.

The one time you wanna fuck it’s because you’re drunk.

“We should get you home angel.”

He didn’t need to say it twice and you hold yourself clumsily up the couch using a sleeping Karen as a prop while Billy grabs your coat.

“Can you stay with me tonight Bill? Please I don’t want to be alone.”

He’s doing his best to be good, helping you put on your coat and your voice is so tiny and cute as you beg him standing by the Castle’s front door.

Again, life was so unfair.

He nods immediately anyway, his body betraying his reason and before he knows it he’s driving towards your apartment.

He has to help you walk into the elevator when you arrive since even in the state you are you refuse to take your heels off and something tells him you’re not as drunk as you pretend to be when you hold on to his bicep, resting your face of his chest in the elevator saying you’re dizzy.

As soon as you enter your home you disappear down a hallway and Billy looks around. It smells powdery and sweet just like you and he wants to fuck you on your pink couch.

But he won’t.

Instead he marches to your kitchen, opening the fridge to gather ingredients for a sandwich the he offers you as soon as you walk back out of your room wearing tiny cream short pajamas with polka dots on them.

“Aren’t you coming to bed?”

Your voice sounds innocent but he knows better. You’re gonna be the death of him.

“Here, eat this.” He ignores your request handing you the plate “It’ll help your stomach after all that tequila.”

“But I’m not hungry!”

“I didn’t ask. Eat.”

He barks a command as he would one of his soldiers even when he knows he has no power here.

Not after you sit on the counter of the kitchen, your legs slightly spread and a force of gravity pushes him to walk in between them.

You’re taking your time to chew and you look tired but the bread seems to be absorbing the alcohol just fine.

“I just don’t get it.”

“Get what?”

“Why boys keep breaking up with me. No one takes me seriously, no one wants me. I’m good enough to fuck but not enough to be a girlfriend.”

Billy can feel his heart shrinking with your statement and he wishes he could tell you that they do want you. All of them do. In fact he had to use violence and threats to get rid of a couple already.

But he gives you a warm smile instead, using his fingertips to put some of your hair behind your ear.

“Maybe you should stop dating assholes.”

That didn’t come out as comforting as he wanted to and you sigh and use your forearm to move him from that sacred place between your thighs, getting off the counter.

He tried his best to ignore the jiggle of your curves as you do but he can feel the zipper of his pants tightening.

“I can’t finish it” you say, a yawn escaping your mouth.

“Fine.” Billy sighs, taking the half eaten sandwich from your fingers “But have some more water.”

“Hey, I didn't mean to force you to stay with me tonight, I’m sorry. Thank you for driving me but you can go if you want.”

‘Leave dickhead’ his head screams ‘It’s time for you to leave’

“I can stay a while.”

The voice in Billy’s head throws it’s hands in the air in exasperation.

“Okay.” Your reply is a whisper but there’s a small smile on your lips.

Billy wishes he had kept the moment cute, but he can’t help his gaze to skim over your body, the outline of your nipples through the tiny cotton top. You adjust the strap on it and Billy looks away, afraid you caught him staring.

“I know this is stupid but I like having you here.” You admit toying with your own fingers in a nervous state “I feel safe.”

Billy knows you mean it as a compliment but the sudden image of all the dangers of the city surrounding you made him anxious. Did you not feel safe when you were alone?

“How long have you been living by yourself?”

“A while. Since Karen moved out.”

That’s a long time. Too long.

You turn to walk towards what seems to be your bedroom and he makes sure he leaves a space between your bodies. He’s not sure if he does it so you know he won’t be creepy tonight or because he wants to watch your ass jiggle with each step.

He wants you to sit on his face.

But you’ve been drinking. You’re not falling down drunk but you’re still drunk.

“Billy?” You call to him from inside the bedroom.

Maybe a little make out session wouldn’t be the end of the world, he thinks.

But that’s it.

There’s a rustling of fabric as he steps into the room and sees you crawl into bed. The sight of you shimmying into the blankets, hair spread on the pillow, waiting for him steals his breath.

He can feel your gaze burning into him and Billy has a sudden urge to flex his muscles, to show off, that until he figures you’re actually staring at his sweater.

Damn that singing reindeer.

“I’ll take it off.” He laughs.

“I actually like it.”

You’re on the right side of the bed, lying on your side facing him. Leaving a space in your bed for him.

“Would you stay for a while longer?” You ask.

“Sure angel.”

“Sorry, you don’t have to, it was dumb of me to ask. I can walk you out if you’d like to go.”

“No, I’d like to stay. I can’t stay the whole night but I’ll stay a little more.”

Billy doesn’t elaborate why, because the why is simply that he won’t be able to control himself sleeping next to your soft body. If he was still there in the morning there was zero chance he wouldn’t fuck you.

“You should rest a little then, before you drive home.”

Your hand is touching the spot next to you on the mattress and Billy gulps.

“You worried about me angel?”

“I’m worried about the other drivers. I’ve seen you drive.”

Your laugh fills the dim light room and it seems to make it easier for him to get closer to the bed, sinking his knee on the soft surface.

“Sorry I don’t have anything your size to put on.”

“Put on?”

“To get comfy. Like pajamas.”

He nods like it was obvious what she meant, but why had his brain gone straight to condoms?

“I suppose you could just… take your pants off.”

Yes.

Yes he could do that.

His body is fighting a battle of mind against dick and he waits for his conscience to win. To tell him to keep his pants on and to walk out the front door, but it never does.

Pants off it is then.

And that god awful sweater while he’s at it.

Standing there in your bedroom in his white under t-shirt and blue briefs Billy realized he’d take whatever punishment the universe threw his way for getting in bed with you in that state, even if you just slept next to him.

He was going to hell anyway.

#Exes past #This is unnnecesary long #But that’s ok #billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfic #i didnt proof read this sorry #my writting

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jjkeverlast · 2 years

Text

true love | N° 2

➵ genre our beloved summer au, exes to lovers, romantic comedy

➵ summary in which you're face to face with your ex again after 5 years, because both of your friends start dating each other.

➵ word count 3.1k

➵ warnings swearing, mentions of sex, alcohol consumption, slight angst in the end (?)

a/n surprise? :0

index | prev. | next.

When the meeting came to an end, your boss asked politely for all of you to give a warm welcome to Taehyung, the new CEO of your firm and your ex boyfriend! That sounds absolutely insane. Jules goes in front to greet him first and it’s obvious she finds him attractive.

‘’Welcome Mr. Kim!’’ Taehyung thanks her and then it’s just the two of you, alone, in the meeting room.

‘’CEO? Really?’’

Taehyung squints his eyes, moving closer to you. You stumble back, not knowing what’s going on in his little stupid brain of CEO. Taehyung continues, until his nose is about to brush against your own – you squint your eyes in discomfort. ‘’Taehyung, what the fuck are you doing?’’ That’s when you felt it. Taehyung’s pointing finger poking your cheek. He continues, his finger digging into your cheek and retrieving until you have had enough.

‘’Huh.You’re real.’’ He looks flabbergasted and that’s when it clicked for you, he’s mocking you.

‘’You motherfu–’’

‘’Y/N, the boss wants to see you.’’ Jules peeks in the meeting room, Taehyung’s smirk on full display and you internally want to slap it off his face. Lucky for him, the boss somehow saved him.

As you step out of the office, you lowly mutter to Taehyung, ‘’this isn’t over.’’

When you almost reach your bosses office, you turn and see Jules laughing with Taehyung over god knows what. Of course he has to flirt with your colleagues, fucking asshole.

‘’Ah, Miss Y/N, have a seat.’’ You obey, sitting down in front of your boss, awaiting what he has to say to you.

‘’I know this might be a bit too much to ask, but I recently found out you and Mr. Kim attended the same college!’’ Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

‘’We did, yes.’’ You awkwardly chuckle.

‘’I was thinking, could you make sure Mr. Kim gets a warm welcome? Maybe it’ll help with a familiar face.’’

You snicker, ‘’Oh, well, seems to me Jules is on the right track to give Mr. Kim a warm welcome.’’

‘’Ah. I’ll be sure to thank her later this afternoon. Thank you, you may leave.’’ You sigh in victory, thanking your boss and walking out of his office. The last thing you want is growing closer to Taehyung. You already have to act like his old high school ‘buddy’ for Jimin and Yeon-su.

You don’t bat an eyelash in the direction of Jules and Taehyung, walking in a straight line to your office. After a few answered emails your stomach growls and you realize it’s lunch break. You grab your jacket, walking out of the office and straight ahead to the corn dog stand around the corner. As you arrive at the stand, you take notice of a familiar face.

‘’Namjoon?’’ You turn your face more towards the familiar stranger and that’s when you notice it really is Kim Namjoon, your former study partner back from college.

‘’Mmm–’’ He exclaims with a half bite of corn dog filling his mouth, his eyes widening when he finally sees you. You laugh, ordering yourself a corn dog to let him chew.

‘’Oh wow. It’s been like what… five years?’’

‘’It has.’’ You receive your corn dog, not wasting another minute and digging in. Your break doesn’t last for more than an hour, so you have to be quick.

‘’How’ve you been? How’s Tae?’’ Tae. It’s been a long while since you heard that nickname being used for him.

‘’We’re not together anymore. We split right before we graduated.’’ Your stomach turns upside down at the reminder of your breakup, and also the thought of having to see him as soon as you return back to the crowded office.

Namjoon seems surprised hearing about your breakup, ‘’wow, that I did not expect. We all thought you two were gonna get married at some point.’’ Ouch. He wasn’t the only one thinking you’d eventually get married, start a family and grow old together. Yet again, life is not a romantic movie. You decide to laugh at his comment, taking another bite to avoid commenting on his acknowledgment of your previous relationship with Taehyung.

It’s nice to catch up with Namjoon, he doesn’t mention Taehyung after you’ve told him about the breakup. He always used to be so respectful and kind and you truly admired that in Namjoon. He was really a good friend back then, always motivating you to continue the endless hours of studying and afterwards treating you to a corn dog. You’re too focused on eating, not noticing some of the sauce smeared itself in the corner of your lip.

Namjoon notices, pointing to your lip indicating you missed a spot. You don’t bother grabbing a napkin, instead you take the base of your palm and try to wipe it away.

‘’Did I get it?’’

Namjoon chuckles before responding, ‘’here, let me.’’ His fingers move towards your face, his thumb about to reach the smeared sauce –

‘’Yah!’’ That causes the both of you to turn, seeing Taehyung with a very angry expression. Namjoon moves back, shocked to see Taehyung in broad daylight.

‘’Taehyung what the fuck is wrong with you?’’ You scream, being astonished over his childlike behavior.

‘’Mr. Lee wants to see you.’’ He turns his head towards you, his eyes still fixated on Namjoon.

‘’Wait– you two work together?’’ Namjoon moves his finger in between you and Taehyung, in complete disbelief that exes work together. You smile through the pain and awkwardly nod. Taehyung finds now to be a good time to show his pearly white teeth. ‘’Yes, in fact we do. Let’s go Y/N.’’ You get pulled by the arm, not being able to give a decent goodbye to Namjoon before he’s out of sight. When you enter the building your insides fume but you have to stay professional – the last thing you want is to get fired for hitting the CEO right where it hurts. Even though you have every right to.

You’re out of sight from the rest when you enter the elevator, Taehyung still holding onto your forearm. ‘’Let go.’’ You warn with gritted teeth and Taehyung just laughs.

‘’What the fuck was that back there?’’ Taehyung looks at you as if you can’t solve two plus two. ‘’You’re kidding.’’

‘’I am not. Enlighten me.’’ You cross your arms, not realizing your breasts are pushed up for Taehyung to see clearer. His eyes roam to your chest for a split second, returning to your eyes and finally responding you, ‘’do you have any idea how in love he was with you back then?’’

‘’Oh please.’’ You don’t believe him, scoffing while rolling your eyes over his ridiculous lies.

‘’Oh Y/N let’s study together, oh Y/N do you need help for the upcoming exam oh Y/N –’’

‘’Shut it.’’ Taehyung stops his Namjoon impression, turning his eyes on the numbers.

‘’Wait a minute…’’ It all clicks for you, Taehyung’s attitude, behavior… ‘’you’re jealous!’’ Taehyung widens his eyes, turning to you sharply, ‘’I am not!’’

‘’Oh you are such a child! I can’t believe you’re jealous when you broke things off.’’ It turns quiet. This is the first time you’ve mentioned the break up in front of him and seeing his expression you understand why you wanted to hold it in forever.

‘’Y/N…’’ He starts off but the doors open in a swing fast motion and you step out. You’re not dealing with this today. He doesn’t try to grab you as you walk away and for the rest of the day you stay locked inside of your office, not wanting to see Taehyung.

you i need a drink [5:32 PM]

koo let’s meet at the local [5:36 PM]

‘’Koo!’’ You run to Jungkook embracing him tightly, needing a hug from your childhood best friend after the mess you went through today. Jungkook is startled by your tight embrace around him and that’s when it clicked for him that something is indeed wrong. He lets you hold him for a while before you both sit down and order two bottles of soju. Jungkook waits patiently for you to speak up but you want to shove the whole bottle down your throat first.

‘’Maybe you should slow down.’’ Jungkook recommends and that only pisses you off as you’re about to finish the bottle in under a minute.

‘’Maybe you should shut up.’’ Okay, that came out maybe a tad bit harsh but your anger was still fueling in the pit of your stomach – the reason behind it, Kim Taehyung.

‘’Okay Y/N, tell me what’s bothering you.’’ Jungkook snatches the bottle away from you, not daring to give it back. You lay comfortably back in the chair and sigh.

‘’I don’t even know where to start.’’ When you listen to yourself explaining what has happened in the span of three days, it sounds absolutely mad. Jungkook doesn’t seem fazed by it, he’s still sipping, waiting for you to break it to him. He has handled you for a very long time, this is nothing compared to the years spent with Jungkook by your side.

‘’So you remember Yeon-su?’’ He nods and that makes you continue, ‘’she invited me to this double date. The guy for me was…’’ You look up to the ceiling, not believing yourself and the upcoming name that will leave your lips at this very moment. ‘’It’s Taehyung.’’ Jungkook is in awe of what you just said and therefore he laughs, thinking you were joking around with him. As Jungkook hits the table, the noises escaping his lips he meets you with a frown.

He dims his laughter, “oh you weren’t kidding.”

“Of course I wasn’t kidding. Why do you think I wanna get drunk?”

Jungkook takes notice of the now empty bottle of soju and your half crooked smile. This was bad. Really fucking bad.

“So, he’s back.” You only hum in response, astonished and desperate to forget by drinking three to five bottles of soju.

You down another shot, getting a judgmental look from Jungkook. “Relax, everything’s fine~.”

“Y/N…” Jungkook is worried, he’s never seen you as desperate for alcohol. Sure there were times where you two sat down and got drunk, but that was out of celebration and not because either of you were overwhelmed or stressed.

“I just— I have to face him everyday.” Jungkook grows confused by your comment and you continue, “he’s the new CEO at my firm.” Jungkook drops his mouth open in shock. “So you’re telling me, your ex of five years is now the CEO?” Your lips form into a thin line, only nodding to Jungkook out speaking the mess you call life.

“Oh wow, your life is like a k-drama!” He exclaims sheepishly.

“Don’t even start.” You warn, pouring another shot of soju and downing it in one go.

“The classic CEO and co-worker love story — with a twist! You’ve already fucked!”

“Thanks for the reminder.” You sarcastically say as you throw your head back and slump in your chair.

“Listen, advice from me to you? Don’t let him get to you. He hurt you badly in the past Y/N. You don’t need that again.” Jungkook grabs your hand, showing support for whatever upcoming disaster will arrive to you.

“What would I do without you Jungkook?” He snickers, encouraging you to let him take you home and you gladly accept.

When you arrive home, you facepalm flat on your bed; your head spinning as if you’re riding a carousel. You slowly begin to doze off, sleep overtaking your body.

“Remember the event on Friday! I expect every single one of you to be there. No plus ones are allowed. This is strictly for the firm only.” Your boss eyes Jules, her cheeks reddening from embarrassment. Let’s hope she learned her lesson from getting fucked in the bathroom at a work event, and ending it with being caught by Mr. Lee himself. You face your note sheet, writing down each detail from today's meeting only to feel eyes bore you and you don’t dare look up. He’s staring at you, all while Jules is sitting next to him. Isn’t she enough for him? She clearly wants him, why can’t he just go for it? He is a free man after all. You cut your thoughts off, stepping out of the meeting with everyone else and heading straight to your office.

Your eyes glued onto your screen until somebody knocks on the glass door. ‘’Heyo!’’

You look up seeing Jules, what does she want now? ‘’What’s up?’’

‘’I heard from a little birdie that you and Mr. Kim went to college together.’’ She starts off, closing the door behind her as if she’s about to spill all her secrets to you. You grow unhinged by her motive and why she exactly brings up Taehyung in this.

‘’We did.’’ She already knew, there was no point in denying as it would only cause a huge embarrassment for yourself.

‘’Could you maybe tell me a bit about him? What does he like?’’ The funny thing is, Jules could literally walk up to Taehyung herself and make small talk. Instead she chooses to bug you about your ex – which she doesn’t know but still, it annoys you how constantly you’re reminded of him and his oh so perfect existence.

‘’Or you could just ask him yourself?’’ Your undertone of bitterness didn’t affect Jules which was the main goal of using it. Dang it.

‘’No! I just want to be able to talk to him more, by speaking of a certain hobby it might help!’’ Oh she for sure is crushing on Kim Taehyung. Bite your anger Y/N. Don’t reveal yourself.

‘’Well, for starters he loves painting.’’

‘’Thank you!’’ Jules rushes out of your office and your eyes pop open to what just happened. You shake your head, returning back to the unanswered emails.

Not long after, your coffee break arrives. You find yourself in the kitchen making your usual cup. The peace and quietness is quickly interrupted by Jules and Taehyung walking in. It’s hard for you to avoid the conversation that’s on display behind you.

‘’The painting on the wall is so beautiful, don’t you think?’’ Jules starts off and you try your best not to laugh at her awful attempt to act as if painting is a hobby of hers just to impress Taehyung.

‘’It is, yeah.’’ Taehyung’s tone seems off, almost as if he doesn’t want to talk to Jules. But then again, you never know.

‘’It reminds me that I love painting.’’

‘’Oh really?’’ She hums in approval and your coffee is finally done which excuses you to leave, however you somehow enjoy hearing Jules try her best to impress which only seems to fail so far.

‘’What do you love about painting?’’ You hear Taehyung ask Jules.

‘’It’s fun.’’

‘’Right.’’ Taehyung’s tone returns and he leaves the kitchen. When he’s out of sight you take the chance to walk out as well only for Jules to stop you.

‘’Did you lie?’’ Now she’s accusing you of lying? Oh wow.

‘’No?’’

‘’Then what the fuck was that?’’ She refers to Taehyung seeming disappointed and leaving in a hurry.

‘’That was… a failed attempt at flirting.’’ And with that you walk back to your office, hearing Jules grunt out of annoyance.

You immediately regret coming to the event. Everyone is nicely dressed in suits and dresses – including yourself. You usually don’t like walking in heels, foremost because it kills your feet and second, you never learned how to actually walk in them.

Most from work are here, Jules is standing by the snack bar, secretly trying to take a chip or two without anyone noticing. Your boss is struggling with each of your colleagues trying to get a raise while you contemplate taking a step back towards the exit. Fuck it, they won’t notice. You don’t watch where you're going, stumbling back and ready to fall only for Taehyung to catch you in time.

‘’Were you just trying to ditch?’’ He whispers against your ear and it sends an unexpected shiver down your spine from having him so close to you.

‘’Maybe. Now let me go.’’ You were determined to keep being cold until Taehyung or you found another job.

‘’If I let go you’ll fall.’’

‘’Thank you for the obvious statement. Now let me go.’’

‘’Y/N.’’

You huff, looking up seeing Taehyung and how softly his eyes are looking at you. Somehow it makes you sense some form of resemblance, a resemblance towards Taehyung, the man that was once yours. It’s the first time in five years you’ve looked this long at him.

You notice his small moles on his face, remembering how you kissed each one of them. His plump lips, who trailed along your neck and longer down to your–

‘’Mr. Kim!’’ Jules excitedly shouts, causing all eyes to turn on you still in Taehyung’s arms, faces inches apart. You both move away quickly, a high tension rising in the corridor near the exit. Jules arrives shortly, not daring to look at you instead wrapping herself on his arm and leading him to the main room.

Taehyung flashes you an awkward smile before he’s out of your sight. You’re finally able to breathe, seeing him so up close causes you to lose all the air in your lungs. He has always been beautiful, and to get reminded of that beauty once again is sickening. Although, now that Taehyung is gone you’re reminded of the hurt you went through. How alone you felt in the middle of the street after he left, many words unsaid.

You stay near the exit, now contemplating whether you actually should go. You end up staying, chatting with Mr. Lee (not for a promotion) and you can tell he’s very relieved over your conversation going a different turn. He looks around, as if he’s trying to spot a certain person.

‘’Are you alright Mr. Lee?’’ You ask in concern, his face in a frown.

‘’I haven’t seen Miss Jules or Mr. Kim in a while.’’ Your heart drops at his discovery. Somehow your mind thinks the worst hearing Jules is most likely alone with Taehyung right now. Your curious mind takes action for you and you explain to Mr. Lee that you'll go and make sure they’re still here. He thanks you and returns to the uptight colleagues with a desperate need for a promotion.

You drop by the bathroom, noticing it’s empty you walk out again and around the main building. You catch a glimpse of the half open door, leading to the closet of cleaning tools. Without thinking any further you open the door with no notice, Jules with her lips latched onto Taehyung’s. She’s pushed quickly away from him when he notices they’ve been caught by you.

perma taglist;

@gimmethatagustd @sugarwithtea @vkookx @mwitsmejk @pjiminbloom @armys-dna @yoongukie-ff @sxtaep @allorarever @haliiimede

taglist for the series;

@rjsmochii @soeur-de-ame @blairscott @tmblr-stanbts @haileyromanoff @kimxhanbin131 @cuteipat @cholychi @seoqity @shimisushi @hisunshiine @yoonjinsyy

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consumedbyfeels-reblogs · 10 months

Text

I watched RWRB and I am disappointed. They cut all the best bits and made it seem that all there wad between Alex and Henry was lust.

SPOILERS!!!

No Bea dumping tea over Philips head and blaming it on the crack she used to smoke

No June at all, no Leo, Alex's parents are happily married which fine I guess but not how it was in the book.

No Cash, which again not the end of the world but i liked him

there was no Rafael Luna so all of that with him didn't happen.

we get a sleezy press guy that Alex apparently hooked up with. I think it way funnier how he needed to basically be slapped in the face with his sexuality by Nora.

Pez is there but they tell us basically nothing about him and he's barely there. he's great in the book but the movie he's meh at best.

No power point

No star wars. its not a thing at all.

We get no late night ice cream at the palace. Alex doesn't even stay he fly in and fly's out like the same day.

We see Henry talk to the cancer patient but don't hear him say anything. The closet scene at the hospital is like 2 seconds of almost nothing.

And worst of all they cut "I want you" "Then fucking have me" from the movie entirely

Henrys mother is just gone, they make a offhanded comment about her saving elephants I think somewhere. i don't remember where.

I'm sure there are a million more little things and probably big things too but it's 4am and I'm tired so I'm gonna get sleep now.

All in all very inaccurate and not great in general in my opinion. which is very disappointing because I love the book. it's one of my favs.

I will give them that Zarah's line about Alex acting like the sun shines out of Henry's ass was better than the original line. And they kept "History Huh?, Bet We Could Make Some". Alex's speech after there emails are leaked is great.

#rwarb #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #henry x alex #red white and royal blue #rwrb spoilers

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plaintoast · 6 months

Text

lots of ramblings about gratitude, grief, my mom, etc below. consider this a friendlocked lj entry that i'm letting anyone read

been thinking since my mom died a lot about gratitude - how grateful i am to have had that weekend with her in july, that the last days i had with her were the best days we ever had; how grateful i am that she didn't suffer for very long; for the outpouring of love and support from friends and strangers alike. it's opened up my heart to being grateful for so much more than that, too - grateful for the sunshine even as the days are short; grateful for safe travels; grateful when a good song comes up in a playlist. outrageously grateful for the album angel in realtime. by gang of youths.

i feel at this point like i skipped the grief entirely. there haven't been a lot of moments in the last three months that i've felt especially... sad? i think about my mom a lot, i think about the fact that i'll never talk to her again, but for the most part i feel at peace with it. i'm sure there will be moments in the future that ARE sad, and there have been moments already that way, but not many. instead i'm filled with this endless capacity for light.

for the past few years at least i've always looked for the bright side and it feels easier than ever now, like if there is some hole in me from loss it can only be filled with good.

i do expect that to shift with time, but when i think about it, i grieved her a long time while she was still alive and well. i did not really get along with my mom in life. as i've been saying in polite company, i challenged her. as i've learned in her death, despite having 3 kids before me, i was the first kid she ever really raised.

we fought a lot. we didn't know how to talk to each other. when i was 12, aware of my own not-straightness, my best friend's sister married a woman, and my mom said she wouldn't go to her kids wedding if it was a same-sex wedding. when i came out to my mom as bi at 19, drunk on apple martinis in a bar with her, she got up and left. when i was 28 and happier than i'd ever been in my life and she found out i was trans (on accident) she wrote me a long email about how i couldn't let the sadness in me make me believe something like that.

i loved my mom a lot, and i was so desperate to have a mom who was also my friend, who treated me like a human being and not her owned property, who respected me. i know she loved me, and i always knew she loved me, but especially after she wrote me that email when she found out i was trans... i spent a lot of time talking to my best friend and my therapist about if i would ever have a relationship with her that felt good. we talked about how much i could forgive, how much i needed her to reciprocate.

sometime in may or june i was on the phone with her while going for a walk (this is something i know i'll miss) and i don't remember how it came up but i told her that i'd been using he/him pronouns pretty exclusively for the past few years, and i remember her taking it... well. she took it well. i remember thinking that maybe there was hope for our relationship.

after she died, my step dad told me that the two of them had in the past couple of days before it happened had a serious conversation about how my mom could accept me as her son, how she'd been working through it and was ready. i believe him. i'm sad i'll never have her in my life as someone who'd finally worked out how to love me right, how to care for me well, but mostly i'm grateful she reached that point at all.

i wish my mom was still alive. i do. but i am filled with all the light she didn't get to shine yet.

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mischief-and-tea-by-the-sea · 8 months

Note

Autumn Asks

frost, lantern, bonfire

frost - if you could give some advice to your younger self, what would you say?

1. Let Mom teach you how to dance. It's not silly, she knew what she was doing, and you would probably have felt far more confident on the dancefloor and not as insecure about dancing now.

2. Tell your aunts and your cousin to go fuck themselves and to get the hell out of your house (when they came to stay while Mom was in the hospital) when you were 17. Ignore Mom's need for peace and 'getting along and staying quiet to keep the peace' because she was in the hospital as it was, not at the house dealing with their cunt-ass attitude, and they needed to be told off. This will teach you to set boundaries that will save your life and your self esteem in years to come.

3. Fuck high school. Drop out, get your GED, find a job you enjoy, and skip college for a year or two while you're figuring out what you want to do.

4. While you're at it, push for your sister to sell the house and move the hell out of Texas before 1993. First off, you'll be the hell far away from Texas and won't ever have to live there again, and second, you'll still have your brother around.

5. Granted, you'll hopefully be out of Texas by this point, but if not (or even if you are), do NOT go out with this one dude EVER. Don't date him, don't live with him, don't marry him. Use those boundaries you figured out with your relatives to tell that gaslighting narcissist to fuck off and die.

6. Don't be an English major if you do go to college. Definitely take creative writing workshops and classes, but don't major in literature. You can happily keep reading whatever you want without having to write dumbass papers that are nothing more than vomiting up other people's theories to back your own up. Fuck that. Go into parapsychology and creative writing. Or fuck academia altogether and just get your career as a tarot reader going from an earlier point. Take creative writing classes for fun.

lantern - how did you meet your best friend? What were your first impressions of each other?

I have a few best friends, and we each met in different ways.

First best friend was childhood best friend who is still a friend but less 'best' now than before. Still, we met through two of our brothers, and I was like...5 or 6, so I think my first impression was that she was cool as hell, but I'm not sure what her impression of me was.

Best friend that lives on the East Coast - we met through a now-defunct site called WitchVox. She emailed me because of the group/coven listing I had up and asked me questions. We emailed back and forth for a week or two, and then we met for coffee at Kettle. She was married at the time, I was married at the time, and our dudes turned out to be douchebags. We kept each other as besties in the divorces. I know one of my first impressions of her was that "Holy fuck, she's tall!" And she reminded me a lot of my mom but with a much more in your face bitch attitude. I'm not sure what her first impression of me was.

Welsh Bestie - We met through the guestbook (yes we're old) of Isaac Bonewits' website because I saw that he called himself a chaotician, so I messaged him. We emailed and IMed, and we've been friends since January of 1999. Haven't met face to face yet. My first impression was that he was cool. Not sure what his first impression was of me. @chaotic-hypnotic-erotic

Jewish Michigan suburb bestie - We met through the Jay and Silent Bob slash yahoo group back in like...what? 2000? 2001? We read each other's fics first, chatted, I'm sure, through the actual groups, and then one night, @kleenexwoman IMed me because I was awake. I thought she was a weird and fun little 18 year old, and I gave her all manner of advice on how to hoard as much food from the student center as she could in her dorm since the student center closed at a certain time of night. She didn't have a car at the time to leave campus, and being stuck in a dorm that didn't allow hot plates, I made suggestions on how she could keep snack type food around. Eventually, I sent her an electric kettle because she could have that, and she could make ramen or mac and cheese in it as well as heat up water for tea. I know I liked her a lot and thought she was weird and funny and fun. No idea what her first impression of me was. I've talked to her on the phone in the past but still haven't met face to face.

Bestie that I run three bingos with - I think we met through here/AO3 (fics and comments), and right away, I liked @scottxlogan because she's sassy and funny and creative and imaginative. We share fandoms and cheerleader each other on through writing and life's bullshit. Still not sure what her first impression of me was, but mine was that she was awesome, and I have a blast running the bingos with her. We make a really good team, and I can't wait to meet her in person because I think we'll get into some really weird but creative trouble together.

Bestie who spent far too long holding the bowl for a dick who didn't appreciate her the way she deserved - I met @raevynlokidottir through LJ way the hell back, and I can't even remember what community it was through. Firefly, maybe? Some pagan community? But that was probably getting close to 20 years ago maybe. Maybe not quite that long, but it's been a long time. It took a little bit to get the engines really revved on the friendship, but she was there for me through the divorce, and by the time I graduated grad school, her daughter was calling me Aunt T, and we were pretty much family. First impressions fuzzy because it was so long ago, and I've slept since then. If my sister and I can get the fuck out of Texas, we'll get to meet because she relocated to a state close to the one we're going to live in.

Work Sister-Bestie - I met her last year when I went to work at a small retail food-new age shop here in the small-ass town I live in. I worked closer to full-time, and she worked two days a week for three hours a day. She'd been working there longer than me, but from the moment I started, we hit it off so much that, aside from actually having to work, we talked from the moment she walked through the door to the moment she left, and we text quite a bit, too. The job was great (aside from not paying quite enough) - how often can you say that you love 99.9% of your customers in retail? Not often. But out of all of that really awesome experience, she is by far the BEST thing to come out of that job. I know that my first impression of her was that she was nothing like I thought she'd be when I first started working with her and that she's so far away from being as conservative as she looks. @missrobbie73 swears and has one of the best dirtiest minds. I think her first impression of me was that she thought I might not like her because I was loud and weird and that I might not get her at first. (She's not active on Tumblr most of the time, but I talked her into joining because I fun that stone blog on here.)

bonfire - describe your dream house.

Dream house would either be on the beach or within a short walk to the beach - obviously not in Texas. Preferably east-northeast. Single story, as I'm getting older and stairs can be a bitch on my knees and ankle. Big wrap-around porch with one part of it facing the beach if possible. 3-4 bedrooms, 2-2 1/2 bathrooms. Big bedrooms, bathrooms, big ass kitchen - maybe open concept kitchen-livingroom-dining room. Tile floors. Living room doesn't have to be huge but cozy enough for guests. I've actually dreamt about this house (or ones like it) for shit...30 years maybe? Wouldn't need a pool but a hot tub would be nice. Maybe a nice outdoor kitchen as well as the big indoor one? Definitely plenty of space to grill and have a firepit on the beach. Doesn't need to be fancy but nice, cozy, sweet. A haven.

Autumnal Asks.

#Autumnal Asks #chaoticgardenbread #Thank you for the asks!

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silver-wield · 8 months

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Yeah, you heard it here first, Cloud Strife is apparently English and somebody summoning KotR in their gameplay is a "secret ultimate ending" and not just somebody using the materia in the game.

Sorry not sorry but I just gotta blow holes in this shit one insane tweet at a time.

Kingdom Hearts is not canon to ffvii. It just isn't. It's not the "canon game for a summon" and are you out of your fucking mind for thinking Kingdom Hearts is making some canonical link between a summon and Disney's Sword in the Stone?! Jfc this is already sounding crazy af 🤦‍♀️

No. There's no "secret ending" to ffvii. You chose a playthrough with a player summoning KotR. Literally every player can do that. Unless they're like you and never played the damn game, you insane carrot. I'm gonna assume you think ffxv's ending where Noctis calls up the kings of yore to defeat Ardyn, which has been confirmed as a callback to ffvii's KotR but at no point did anybody say the endings were identical or that KotR is a mandatory or secret speshul ending appearance. Cloud, at no point in KH, is ever intending to or looking for king Arthur. He is always searching for Sephiroth so they can settle their shit. He never becomes a KotR. Again, you're confusing ffxv with other games. Noctis's father becomes a King of Yore at the end of ffxv and helps defeat Ardyn. I mean, if you can't keep basic plotlines straight why are you even talking in the first place?

Show me where Cloud's an "Englishman"? Show me where England and Germany are on the map of the planet. He's no more English than he is German and you need to stop listening to that nutbar Calli and her made up garbage based on her own HC fap material. King Arthur wasn't a real person, dumdum. Plz don't talk about English history if you haven't ever learned it in school.

Strife isn't a last name. It's a bloody noun. And Strauss is the German word for ostrich.

He's the fucking player character. He doesn't know how to get the materia. You know how to get the materia.

Kh isn't canon to ffvii or the KotR. Kh1 and 2 leaned heavily on squareenix to grab a player base and build its following. Once kh became established in its own right they began to phase out the FF cameos because the characters aren't needed to keep real players interested in the plot. You aren't a real player, so shut up.

You're an idiot who can't accept an in game email talking about things characters have seen and done isn't canon compared to WoFF, another game that isn't canon to ffvii.

Again: WoFF is not canon to ffvii. Serah isn't married at the point her character appears. Zack isn't with Aerith. He's a soldier 2nd class. I know it's hard for your small brain to comprehend but SE takes characters from different points in their own lives to mix and match in cameos for fanservice. Cloud appears in multiple titles as OG soldier Cloud and post AC Cloud. Tifa appears in WoFF as cowgirl Tifa at age 15 before she's traumatized. Get a fucking clue.

Again: Zack is single at that point in his life.

Aerith is lying and sucking as much copium as y'all do. The translation is also shit in OG because she doesn't call him a ladies man in JP, she says he's a friendly guy.

Idky you think kh, WoFF and KotR are some weird ass "canon" link that proves your garbage ship or disproves Zack is a decent guy, but you need to shut up.

That's all. Don't bother trying to educate yourself, just shut up. We don't want to hear from you. At all.

Shut up.

#ship war #cult bs #slam debunk #petty bench mode activated

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ohanny · 1 year

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another friday, another cutie pie episode! so here are my thoughts while watching the second episode:

kuea is absolutely not me because i would never check my email first thing in the morning, notifs be damned

also even if i did get good news, i would not have the energy to throw a full "blackpink in your area" on top of my bed

kuea: oh yes, i am a bit... sore lian: ¬‿¬

ugh, why can't you just talk to this man who just happens to be a supportive, relatively mentally stable, functioning adult who dresses nice, cooks you food, pulls out your chair and YOU ACT LIKE THE RETURNING HIDE AND SEEK CHAMPION OF 2022

lian: if you need help, you can always tell me me: IF ONLY

nonetheless, i've had a boyfriend for a decade and i feel as single as the last crushed pringle at the bottom of the tube of doom when zee looks at nunew

kuea, a lying liar who lies: kon diao texted me lian: i love you me: KUEA DO YOU FEEL EVEN A LIL BAD???

i love the mission impossible theme tune

nong diao squared ready to cover up crimes

yi can smell bullshit a mile away but unfortunately for him, he's also a weak victorian bitch who gets flustered by a cheek touch from a twink he (alledgedly) fucked in his car just last week

JUST SHOW ME PERTH YOU COWARDS chapter 2

diao is a good friend with a good brain cell. we all need a diao.

kuea: i have a lot to think about. me: you also have a lo to TALK about goddammit

meanwhile poor lian is just trying to plan his barbie dream wedding, oh dear

yi is here to be the best man but also to watch the world burn.

kon diao loves lists. kon diao is me.

the world does not deserve diao. this show certainly doesnt. if he was running it, again, it would be 5 minutes long. well, maybe 15. he would keep all the spicy bits.

this beauty clinic is totally not the sponsor of this series.

the totally not sponsoring intensifies

"how do i look?" EXACTLY THE SAME AS YOU DID 30 SECONDS AGO YOU BABY SKINNED MOCHI OF PERFECTION

i will never not mishear this as "cosmic-exo entertainment" and i am not sorry

uh-oh, their barbie dream weddings are NOT the same

lsakjfkasljfafj a nuer x syn intermission! and nuer has a less questionable shirt on!

you two (ಥ﹏ಥ)

but props to syn never hiding his intentions and props to nuer respecting his choices even if they make him a sad boy. SOME PEOPLE could never

hia yi is eternal suffering personified even at a cake tasting and quickly becoming my favourite.

foei: oh is it too crowded? do we need more room? the gays: *offended*

salaldkjf i am catching vibes. pls tell me they will grey's anatomy this and diao and yi will end up getting married in the barbie dream wedding horror show while kuea and lian elope in korea

"you can make the final decision" says lian, not having any idea they like the polar opposite things.

he is a smooth bastard though. "ah yes, my favourite wedding singer will be too busy being my husband"

"oh no, how will our suits match if we cannot see them?" you dumbo, you have kon diao, the wedding planner extraordinaire. he has a list for that.

diao has been calling out bullshit since birth at this point.

yi: ah yes, they are so compatible. diao: dude, they can't agree on anything. yi: which is not my problem.

yi really be like "pfffft, let them talk it out between them" as if we have time to be here for the next ten years. he really couldn't give less fucks, lol

DIAO LEGIT IS LIKE IZZIE PLANNING MERDER'S WEDDING

how can he answer cosmic-exo in that suit. go change.

oh, the straights are at it again

lian: thank you yi: oh, you already picked a suit? lian: yes yi: wow, i am so helpful. you are blessed to have me tolerate you.

i love how nunew's voice gets so much deeper when he switches to english

IF ONLY YOU WERE THAT EXCITED ABOUT YOUR OWN WEDDING

kuea: what should i do? me screaming at my tv: TALK TO YOUR MAN

diao is seriously like baby yoda and syn doesn't need to become a monk. he just needs to hang out with diao more for some deep wisdom and then keep living in sin.

nuer is a sweet understanding angel and syn is a pouty baby and i could watch these two forever

"it's our wedding, not just mine." except you have NO IDEA you're not getting your wedding but an industrial scale keerati legacy production

yi: see? they're totally on the same page diao: ...

who is this random laxatives lady and why does she look like she's about to place a curse on kuea?

lian: you pick kuea: i am fine with everything narrator: he was not, in fact, fine with anything

diao turn of the tap for fucks sake, it is very obvious you are not paying your own bills in this economy

diao: my dog is so smart yi: your dog is literally an idiot

oh god here we have hia yi talk about marriage and kasdjflkafj they might kiss and i can't believe i am about to say this but at this point diao needs to worry about me cooking that cockblocking dog :D

WE HAVE A STAIRCASE WITH A HAND RAIL? IN A BL?!?!?!

lian: *trying* kuea: cosmic-exo is calling, byeee

look at his sad eyes, he KNOWS

"why am i talking to a doll?" BECAUSE IT IS MORE LIKELY TO HAVE AN ACTUAL CONVERSATION WITH YOU. you deserve better, boo.

lian: aren't you kirin already kuea: but i could be cosmic-exo kirin in korea. lian: okay. kuea: ... wait what?

OH FUCK SCREW THE WEDDING WAS THAT PERTH I JUST SAW?!?!?!?

#cutie pie the series #cutie pie 2 you #episode recap reaction whatever #lian x kuea #yi x diao #the gays are at it again: wedding edition

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