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marciabrady · 8 months

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it's so funny to me that the princess our culture associates fundamentally with passivity offers credos which are among the most active and powerful of any in the fairytale canon

first and foremost, cinderella communicates that we all are what we contribute.

cinderella saves the mice and fosters an environment of collaboration, harmony, and unity that's harbored by her own industrious nature. mind you, she does all of this against her stepfamily's wishes, actively defying them, and creating a counterculture in the process.

as the story team intended the animals to be a reflection of their human counterpart, notice how cinderella's kindred are uniformly hardworking, intentionally kind, and approach every situation with their best foot forward, adapting a problem-solving mindset that collectively aids them all in their shared progression toward the betterment of themselves and the world around them. take the very first scene in which we see cinderella and the culture she's created, for instance:

everyone has a hand in the first chores of the day and they're all choosing to do it with a smile on their face. key word: choosing. because this isn't an idly happy lot whose joy is an accident of their own nature or something that's easy. their happiness is something they have to be mindful of and, in many cases, fight against themselves to achieve. because, guess what? their life is terrible. they've been reduced to living in a dusty attic room of a decaying house. many of them were saved from death by cinderella, herself, and know that if they venture too far outside of the safe quarters she's provided, or if they allow themselves to be seen in some way, they'll be back at death's doorstep. the danger and stress they live under would cause anyone to snap, or anyone to never want to get out of bed, which is why we see them looking like this in one of the most relatable openings of all time:

i mean, cinderella canonically hits the snooze button:

the birds literally have to force her to wake up, initially:

and once she does wake up, she's playful and pleasant and kind, yes. but that doesn't last long- the clock immediately tries her by reminding her of the daily toil she must face in order to maintain the food and shelter that's tantamount to, not only her own survival, but that of this tiny community that she's the unofficial mayor over and continues to be responsible for. she has to sustain herself and the others she's collected around her by choosing to live life the way she does. this kindness is something she has to pay for, every day. and she physically snarls at being reminded of the hand life's dealt her:

and you know what? that's a very human quality that everyone can identify with in some regard because it's hard, even if you are someone who loves life and the people around you, to keep going in spite of the challenges you face. being positive, plainly put, is something that's difficult and you have to keep reengaging yourself to be because it isn't a natural state for most people, and especially not people that have been treated as unkindly as cinderella. let's not forget that she lost both of her parents at a young, formative age, and from that time in her youth when, like all other children, she deserved to be supported and loved and protected, she was literally "abused, humiliated" and "forced" into being a literal "servant in her own house." she had no security- both of her parents were gone, she had no money to fall back on, no education, no means with which to leave the house, and to try to get a job in that world and environment- as unlikely as it would've been to obtain in the first place (which, again is so relatable- look at the staffing shortages and people struggling to find employment today)- would've been contingent upon references of some sort, and we all know that lady tremaine definitely would've either a) ran a smear campaign against cinderella to absolve herself and the family name of any personal fault or b) prevented cinderella from ever leaving in the first place so that no one would ever know that atrocities the tremaines forced her to endure from the time she was practically an infant.

she wakes up after barely being able to sleep, probably, due to all the daily chores she must, alone, accomplish to keep an entire estate afloat. everyone is depending on her, from the stepfamily to the mice to the grounds of her family's home itself. her body's practically aching from the lack of rest, the physical work she's forced to do every day, from sleeping on such an uncomfortable bed. the only place she feels remotely safe is in this drafty attic, which smells of fraying wood and aging artifacts and is in a constate state of decay, with weeds growing in the sides of the tower. that's not even mentioning the emotional turmoil, the ptsd, the grief, the neglect, the physical abuse she's also processing at any given moment

so, yeah, cinderella snaps. and there are times she snaps later on in the film but she always reels herself in and consciously makes the choice to never succumb to her circumstances. this is what makes cinderella extraordinary. she singlehandedly- and actively- ends the cycle of abuse through the behavior and choices she partakes in every single day.

and, again, this isn't something that's easy for someone who has been in survival mode for a majority of their life. but the conscious choices, active efforts, and mindful decisions cinderella makes is what frees the household from that cycle of abuse continuing. i mentioned earlier that the animals are supposed to be a parallel to their human counterparts. remember how we meet gus? he's just been caught in a trap, doesn't have anything to wear, and is literally recoiling in fear. due to his terror and his own need to defend himself out of instinct, he attempts to make himself come off as threatening as possible and is ready to pop off the minute that jaq approaches him:

but, through cinderella's influence, she's able to give him hope once more. she treats him warmly, pairs him up with a buddy to go through life with, comes up with a name- and even a nickname- for him, gives him a community, a safe haven, and clothes him. in that short time, look at the difference she's made in his mood, his demeanor, even his approach to life:

and it isn't just the mice cinderella's this way with. in the opening slides, we see cinderella holding an adorable puppy dog. but as the film progresses, and the narrator details the despair the family estate has fallen into, that puppy dog turns into an old, starved bloodhound who's secretly sleeping on the floor of the cold kitchen to keep from freezing to death. he has to keep even his dreams to himself so as to not be heard by the stepfamily and potentially kicked out. he openly hates lucifer but cinderella encourages him to think of lucifer's good points too, even if she can't think of any herself, to be able to continue successfully cohabiting this environment with him. and when he pounces on lucifer, deserved or not, she puts an end to this:

because cinderella knows what will ever happen if bruno allows himself to give into his impulses, to treat others as life has treated him, to attempt to retaliate in an impossible environment when the odds are already against you. you'll harm yourself the most and perpetuate that cycle.

but, just as bruno is a reflection of cinderella, notice how gleeful lucifer is in falsely incriminating bruno, so that another being who's never wronged him will be unjustly punished and suffer:

this is what separates cinderella from the tremaines. this is why she is the heroine and they will never be, despite how many people you see empathizing with how unfairly life must've treated them for being the "conventionally unattractive" characters in the film, or for having a single mother which to them denotes less resources, or for being awkward, or for whatever other reason of the month they're being rewritten to be the victims.

if we are the sum of our contributions, the tremaines are nothing and that is definitely a reflection of their reality. they only feel alive when they're making fun of cinderella or humiliating her by continuing that cycle of abuse they passively adhere to and never challenge. remember how we met cinderella and her friends, gathering their spirits and putting on a smile, despite how hard it is with the troubles that face them? how they look past that to work together and try to change life for the better?

the tremaines can't be bothered to get out of bed. the truly passive, lazy characters, they grog about in dim rooms, turning around in their fine silks and ornate finery, while a being they literally enslaved is being forced to do their bidding. and they refuse to actively participate in their very charmed and privileged life. they can't even find a reason to be happy- but instead are upset when cinderella enters their room. they want to know why she's taken so long, to hurry up, to continue to wait on them, hand and foot. when she asks them how they're doing, they grumble, "as if you care." because they don't care about anyone else, so why would others care about them? and that type of apathy breeds resentment, which- in the wake of such sedentary creatures- seeks manifestation and results in destruction. the stepsisters get out of their comfortable beds only when they have the opportunity to point their finger at cinderella, to get their mother to punish her. again, they feel alive by inflicting pain on others, it's literally what gets them out of bed:

again, as the parallel, this goes for lucifer, too:

as cinderella nears lady tremaine's bed, her stepmother's eyes blaze with fury, hatred plain on her face:

lady tremaine doesn't move, her hand only lifting to stroke lucifer, who has the biggest grin on his face. meanwhile, the desperation is evident in cinderella. she isn't quite defeated, because she does stick up for herself three times in the scene. but she's tired of this. she's tired of being tormented by her only family, of having the odds stacked against her even when she's doing everything in her power to live as peacefully and productively as possible, of being forced to fight a losing battle that will never result in peace but will only further prompt hatred, and division, and anger. in her expression, there's almost a plea for lady tremaine:

it isn't until she sees cinderella's expression, she hears cinderella try to explain what happened, that she livens up. because she has the opportunity to, again, keep that cycle of abuse alive, to actively try to destroy cinderella's quality of life and to profit off the position of power she's in over cinderella. look at the difference in lady tremaine's expression in the previous cap, and in this one, when she believes she's silenced cinderella and is preparing to tear into her:

one of the best instances through which i can further illustrate this ideology (you are what you contribute) is in a later scene, where we see the stepsisters discard their fine wares, labeling it trash and flinging the luxuries life's afforded them to scorn. it's nothing to them.

yet, to the mice and cinderella, it isn't nothing. because, remember, the royal proclamation declared that every eligible maiden should attend. at first, the stepmother refuses to let cinderella go and even the stepsisters brush her aside with classist comments. when cinderella sticks up for herself by reminding them she's still a member of the family, and by trapping them in the language of the royal decree "every eligible maiden," lady tremaine has no choice but to consent- on the grounds that cinderella is able to make herself eligible through producing a suitable dress. because, remember, cinderella isn't seen as a person. she's seen as subhuman, someone who's reduced to wearing tatters and isn't seen as a person in the eyes of their society unless she has social indicators of wealth via her clothing, in this specific instance. drizella and anastasia never have to think about that, because they exist as people of value in their society due to their good fortune that they had no part in creating. they don't know what it's like to be laughed at, to not be considered eligible or even a person in the eyes of society the way that cinderella's lived experience has reflected since her father died. meanwhile, the tremaines are so deep in their own privilege, that they're literally waving it around like it's a rag and carelessly tossing it away. yet, what does cinderella do, with much less?

cinderella makes do with what little she has, always to help someone else. and because of this active kindness, it changes the mindset of those around her. since she's afforded this to so many of the mice, what do they do for her in return?

what a difference in how cinderella and the stepfamily approaches what's, essentially, the same material? and this community that cinderella has established and continually maintained and influenced comes to each other's aid, time and time again. whether it's cinderella freeing the mice from death, or giving them clothing, or allowing bruno to sleep inside unbeknownst to the stepfamily, or the mice turning into a LITERAL army and battleground in cinderella's honor:

again, this community is just as active and vital as cinderella, herself, is. because those values i mentioned earlier, of helping one another and rising above your circumstances and working together, aren't just whimsical morals cinderella sings about. they're constant behaviors she's actively taking part in and impact the household they all share, to the point where when they help each other take action when the time is right. they're constantly conferring with one another on how to best use their community and the resources this offers to get closer to victory. (meanwhile, the stepfamily is only for themselves; anastasia and drizella literally repeatedly hit each other and compete, even to the point of giving conflicting stories to the grand duke that makes their pathetic attempt seem all the more discreditable at alleging they were the princess at the ball the night before) we see it in how cinderella and her friends accomplish their chores together, in how the mice plan to get her dress remade while she's busy, even in how cinderella's quick thinking leads to calling upon bruno, who must be awoken by the birds with an interjecting call from the horse, and how this leads to all of their escape:

because, this community also knows when it to fight and support one another in times of battle and when the goal will bring about a victory that will ultimately reign peace; they know when it's worth it for a shared goal and the benefit of all parties involved. and the difference cinderella brought into that household is what gave them all glory and helped them, not only survive, but succeed. it isn't just the poor scullery maid we see ascend in the closing chapter of the film. we see the same bluebirds who attempted to wake her up in the beginning of the film holding her wedding veil:

we see those same mice that she nursed from death, and clothed, and fed, and loved; the mice that risked their lives in remaking her deceased mother's dress so that cinderella might, too, have a chance to go to the ball; they're still here, cheering her on and throwing rice in blessing at the happy couple, their own clothing being upgraded to reflect that of the royal staff:

we see that starved bloodhound and the old horse leading the royal regiment, as beautiful and shining and proud as their majestic counterparts:

and this is the world that cinderella, as a character, offers. not a world in which multiple parties are at competition with one another over who's the prettiest, or the wealthiest, or where hatred breeds continual hatred. but she presents us a world in which everyone deserves to be seen, heard and valued; where everyone can find a community they can contribute to and have purpose in and be worthy of experiencing love, whatever you determine love to be whether it's romantic or in the form of a found family.

a world in which everyone can go to the ball:

#mine #marciabrady #cinderella #cinderella 1950 #this was supposed to be 2 credos but i got carried away #maybe i'll write the other one in a future installment #but ahhh it feels so nice to be back #*ahem* if you learned anything from this or were inspired please source or credit #creative larceny isn't cool!

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felassan · 2 years

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BioWare have announced that Dragon Age: Dreadwolf has hit its Alpha Milestone, a huge step forward in the game's development [source].

A blog post by BioWare General Manager Gary McKay reads:

Game Update

A New Milestone for Dragon Age: Dreadwolf

Moving closer and closer to completion. Hello,

In my last blog, back in February, I talked about the next Dragon Age™game entering the production phase. Well, we’ve come a very long way since then, and the team is incredibly happy to announce a huge step forward in the development of the game you now know as Dragon Age: Dreadwolf™: We have just completed our Alpha milestone!

Up to this point, we’ve been working hard on the various parts of the game, but it’s not until the Alpha milestone that a game all comes together. Now, for the first time, we can experience the entire game, from the opening scenes of the first mission to the very end. We can see, hear, feel, and play everything as a cohesive experience.

NOW WHAT?

Of course, the game is not finished by any means, but Alpha is one of the most important game development milestones for a number of reasons. First and foremost, we can now turn our sights toward bringing the visual fidelity to its final form and iterating on gameplay features. The big question now is, “Where do we focus our efforts?” To answer that, we solicit feedback from a number of sources, including our Community Council members who each have unique perspectives and experiences, our quality verification team, and extensive internal playtesting. Gathering feedback from multiple sources gives us the greatest insight on where we need to spend more time improving the experience.

Additionally, we can now evaluate the game's pacing, how relationships evolve over time, and the player’s progression, as well as narrative cohesion—essentially how the story comes together. We can take the story we’ve written and see if we’re expressing it well through the characters, dialogue, cinematics, and ultimately, the player’s journey. Now that we have the ability to do a complete playthrough, we can iterate and polish on the things that matter most to our fans.

Hitting Alpha was the culmination of so much effort from the entire team and we used this milestone as an opportunity to come together and celebrate. We held a hybrid-style event with people onsite while others joined remotely and the team showcased their work to everyone at BioWare. We even took some time to do something fun and non-work related—a virtual escape room where we had to work together to help someone on camera find their way out. It was a really great time, and no matter where our devs are, it's important to share these types of moments together.

START TO FINISH

Now that we’re finally able to experience the entire game, for me, my favorite part is the characters. Whether followers, allies, or villains, they’re woven into the game in ways that take a concept that’s always been a part of the Dragon Age DNA—stories about people—and push it further than ever before. The characters help contextualize the world and the stakes, and I can’t wait until we’re able to start really discussing them in depth.

It’s also exciting to finally be able to bring our fans to parts of the world that we’ve previously hinted at, but never been able to fully explore—like the city of Minrathous, the capital of the Tevinter Empire. We’ve talked about Minrathous in previous games, and now you’ll finally be able to visit! It’s a city built on and fuelled by magic, and the ways in which that has come through in its visual identity, and what that looks like in comparison to previous cities we’ve visited in Dragon Age, are pretty spectacular.

As I mentioned earlier, the Alpha milestone is an extremely important one for us, but there’s more work to be done. We also want to continue being transparent with you, our community, and keep you up to date on what we’re crafting. Hopefully you’ve been enjoying our development updates on Dreadwolf this year as we’ll be looking to share more in the future.

IN CLOSING

Of course, Dreadwolf isn’t the only thing happening here at BioWare™! We have a team hard at work envisioning what the future holds for a new single-player Mass Effect™ game. And we look forward to celebrating our community on N7 Day next month. The SWTOR team also continues to work on their next update, so keep an eye on SWTOR.com and their social media accounts for any and all details on the coming game update.

It’s an incredible time at BioWare! We have so many cool things to show you in the future. Until then, thanks for being part of our community. We couldn’t do this without you.

Stay well,

Gary McKay

General Manager [source]

#dragon age: dreadwolf #da4 #dragon age 4 #the dread wolf rises #bioware #mass effect #next mass effect #video games #sw:tor #mj best of

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writingquestionsanswered · 8 months

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Do you have any advice for someone starting a blog on blogger for (young/teenage or aspiring) writers by a teenage aspiring writers for me to share things I've learnt over the years of trial and failure.

Tips for Young Writer Blogging for Young Writers

First and foremost: there's no such thing as an "aspiring writer." People say it a lot, but it has no meaning. You can be an aspiring author or an aspiring professional writer, but if you write, you're a writer. Period. Being a writer doesn't require publication or being paid for your writing. Now, some tips! ♥

1 - First and Foremost, Don’t Overthink It.

I’m starting here, because this is a subject that can be very overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. Some writers/authors seem to have limitless time to dedicate to social media, but most of us don’t, and that’s okay. It’s better to prioritize your writing, but there are things you can do to work social media into your routine. Also, don’t feel like everything you post has to be related to writing, your writing life, or some super interesting event or adventure. Content is content. It can be just about anything.

2 - Find a Unique Gimmick.

“Gimmick” can be kind of an ugly word, but say what you want about gimmicks–they work! You have a built-in gimmick by being a young writer who's writing about their own trials, failures, and successes. However, coming up with a unique theme, choosing a matching title and aesthetic, and having at least some consistent content that is unique to your blog can all help to get your blog noticed.

3 - Find Your Community.

It helps to think about who your target audience is. We know they're young writers, but what else do they like? What do they write about? What do they like to read? Where do they hang out online? Knowing these details can help you find your community and target your content. Follow similar bloggers and look at the followers of similar bloggers to see who you can follow (who might follow you back). Interaction is important to building and maintaining followers. You don't have to interact with everyone, but making sure you engage with at least some of your followers will keep them coming back.

4 - Be Somewhat Consistent.

You may want to vary your content to three or four different types, for example: blog posts, WIP snippets, reblogs, and advice posts. Then, make sure you stick to those three or four types of content pretty consistently. It's not that you can never vary, but sticking with that content most of the time lets your blog readers know what to expect when they seek out your blog. You should also make sure you post at a fairly consistent rate and time, like every Monday afternoon and every Friday morning. Again, the consistency helps the reader know what to expect.

Content Ideas:

writing advice/tips

writing-related/motivational/book quotes

pictures that relate to what you write/want to write

pictures that relate to reading/writing

reblogs from other writers/readers

writing/reading related memes

aesthetics of your favorite books or your WIPs

personal writing-related anecdotes

writing tip/advice posts (share what you know!)

photos of your writing space/reading area

pictures of handwritten quotes or tips that you want to share

photos of coffee, tea, stationery, books, pets, nature

your monthly goals/end of month review

Book, movie, tv show, video game reviews

Arts, Crafts, DIY, Cooking, Adventures, and Other Hobbies

5 - Know Your Hashtags.

Hashtags are super important in getting your content into other people’s feeds. Look at the hashtags other people are using for similar posts, start making a list and go explore them. See which ones get the most traction. You can also use Google to find lists of suggested hashtags.

And most of all...

Be Patient…

One of the hardest things about writing blogs is feeling like you’re shouting into a wind tunnel. It can be really, really hard to build up followers, and even once you have them, it can sometimes feel like no one cares. Interaction on social media tends to be as low as 5% to 10% of your total number of followers, so if you have 30 followers, you may get as few as one or two likes and reblogs per post. Don’t let that discourage you. It doesn’t mean only 1 or 2 people care. It just means only 1 or 2 people are bothering to engage. A lot of people browse their feeds and never hit the like or reblog button, but they still see your post and probably enjoyed it. Stick with it. It may take months before you start to build up a more solid following and gain more interaction, but if you stick with it and are consistent with your posts and interaction with others’ posts, you’ll get there.

Be sure to let me know once it's up and you have a few post up. I will be happy to share it! ♥

Best wishes on this endeavor!

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

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natasha-in-space · 3 months

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Can you please write a headcannon post on Jumin as a girl dad.

OH GOD ANON THIS TURNED OUT SO MUCH LONGER THAN I INITIALLY PLANNED???

Regardless, we are on the same wavelength. Jumin is definitely a certified girl dad. He just exudes that energy to me. Starting a family with a partner who he trusts and adores is a sweet thought Jumin starts to fully consider only once he meets you. He is a family man at heart. It comes to him naturally.

Now, if you thought the way Jumin is with you at the end of his route was sweet enough, you haven't seen anything yet. He will become the softest man imaginable with his kids. The press sees a stern businessman with a heart of ice, but the way he absolutely melts away when his daughter greets him at the door with an excited sparkle in her eyes is anything but stern or icy.

If his daughter is brought into his life by natural means, I think he would be extra protective and gentle towards his partner throughout the entire process. Almost to a fault. He doesn't want you to lift a single finger if you don't want to, and you will be taken care of by the best possible personnel to cater to your each and every whim.

Whether you are someone who will happily let things go and relax, or you prefer to be more independent, is up to you. Jumin may be a bit of a worrywart with you in this particular case, but he respects your choices first and foremost. You just have to communicate your needs to him, and he will listen.

He doesn't really care about the sex of the child. His sole desire is for them to be born healthy and strong. And for you to be as comfortable and safe as possible, of course. His father is way more pushy on the subject, though, so that's something to deal with, unfortunately. What Jumin does do is pick out some names with you in advance. It's a shared activity, one filled with many tender smiles and laughs.

Will he feel emotional when he hears his daughter cry for the first time? Absolutely. He would already be a big nervous wreck on the day of her birth. So many things can go wrong, and his head is buzzing with all kinds of possibilities. The lack of any means of control is stressful, but he does all he can to be there for his partner through it all. Now, Jumin is not someone who cries easily or often, and I don't think he'll be full-on shedding tears in that moment. But his breath definitely gets caught up in his throat, and his heart races so fast, it might as well just tear right through his chest at any given moment. He feels tears building in his eyes, and he swallows a huge lump in his throat. But, those are happy tears. Especially when his eyes meet yours. You are tired, very tired, but you are happy. And, most importantly, safe. And that confirmation is what makes him smile, too. He will only get even more choked up when he hears muffled congratulations and the words 'healthy baby girl' among some others that his overwhelmed mind just can't catch yet.

It's a girl.

His baby girl.

He'll definitely melt inside the moment he sees you holding your baby for the first time: the image will definitely be engraved into his memory forever. He has the softest of smiles on his face, and he kneels by the bedside without much thought, making sure not to disturb either of you, but still wanting to be close all the same. His favorite thing ever is when his daughter reaches up with her teeny tiny hand and grabs his finger. If there is any particular moment where he will cry, it's this one.

His perfect little family, all here.

When he sees his daughter again, who is already all clean and bundled in an adorable little blanket, he will spend a lot of time just looking at her every little detail, his heart feeling so full that he's almost not sure what to do with himself. There's no doubt that he will point out certain features that remind him of you. You can't see it for the life of you, but he's as observant as always. Definitely gets anxious about holding his daughter. He's afraid to mess up with his tall size because she's so incredibly small and fragile. It won't happen until he receives accurate instructions on how to properly hold a baby. He's very stubborn on that. Funny little quirks aside, it truly amazes him that you and him created something so perfect and wonderful out of your love for each other. However cheesy that may sound. As he sees your little girl in your arms, his heart fills with so many warm and fuzzy feelings, and there is not a single doubt in his mind on what it is.

Happiness. He is truly happy.

Will definitely take lots of pictures. Blurry, silly pictures that everyone will laugh at. He adores them though. His favorite one is of you and his daughter napping, with her on your chest. It looks like a huge blob of similar colors, but he's confident where what is. You'll have to persuade him not to put one of those in a frame in his office. Or not. It's possible that you are someone who will simply smile and let him do what makes him happy.

Jumin will never want to stop holding his daughter once he overcomes his initial nerves. The smallness of her appearance, tucked away in his arms and snoring happily, is absolutely adorable to him. Worst thing is, your daughter comes to adore him just as much, so good luck trying to put her into her crib. She'll start crying the second you try to take her away from him. Jaehee is going to encounter numerous instances where he refuses to move because his daughter is napping in his arms. In a more serious manner, it's actually a significant source of comfort for him. Overtime, he notices that he tends to go and hold his daughter whenever he feels stressed or exhausted after a hard day at work. No longer drinking as often. It's not to imply that his drinking was problematic. Judt thst his daughter is now his main source of comfort, after you, of course.

It's very common for these two to fall asleep together on the couch, with Elizabeth the third curled up at his legs as a bonus. It's a lovely sight, really. One that never fails to melt your heart whenever you see it.

Jumin will truly enjoy caring for his daughter. He already has a knack for performing repetitive tasks, so he's more than willing to assist you when you're too tired. Of course, things won't be picture perfect by any means, but you two will establish a very functional system with shared responsibilities rather quickly. He's very in tune with your daughter. It's no surprise at all, as he's naturally observant and keeps track of people's behavior for his personal comfort. He will eventually be able to recognize when his little girl is hungry, wants a nap, or wants her favorite toy (it's a plush of Elizabeth the 3rd).

That said, while he's great at your usual caring things, he's terrible at taking her to the doctor. He knows it's for her own good, but seeing her crying out of fear of getting shots just pulls at his heartstrings so badly, you might have to hold his hand as well. Getting shots is a stressful ordeal for the whole family, and you will have two family members to cuddle and kiss after all is done.

When it comes to terms of endearment, he's not at all shy about them. They're not anything crazy: sweetheart, princess, and firefly are the ones he uses the most. The last one is because his daughters smiles are so bright, they remind him of fireflies for some reason. Will occasionally slip in something different like 'baby' or 'sunshine' as well.

One of Jumin's primary love languages is gift giving, and you already know what that means. Gifts. Lots and lots of gifts. Your daughter will receive anything she wants: stuffed animals, puzzles, dolls, coloring books, robots, dresses, anything. Despite his very rational and measured attitude, he can't say no to you, and, subsequently, that same habit gets transferred onto your daughter as well. This may get a bit out of hand when he starts to genuinely consider getting her a pony just because she saw one on a family visit to a farm. You might need to rein him in quite a bit in that regard. That's not to say that he's spoiling to a fault. It's just a flaw you'll have to deal with, much like anyone in a parenting position.

After you, his daughter is his biggest fan of his humor. Maybe it's because she grew up around those kinds of jokes, or maybe it's simply because she's his daughter, nobody really knows. What Jumin does know is that it makes him adore her even more, if that's even possible. She will burst out into a fit of adorable giggles whenever he makes a silly joke or two, all while what workers are around at the moment can only chuckle sheepishly and look off to the side with a sense of awkwardness in the air. Does that mean Jumin eventually develops an affinity for dad jokes? You bet.

As I already wrote about him in a different post, Jumin will engage in his child's interests wholeheartedly, whatever they may be. He never received anything like that as a child, so he is determined to do the opposite. Your daughter loves marine life and can't stop babbling random facts about orcas? He will watch countless of documentaries with her and suddenly decides to donate a large amount of money to an orca conservation program. Is My Little Pony her new obsession? You should be prepared, as Jumin will talk to you about every episode they've watched before bed, and you'll love it. She loves transformers? Same story. He is cognizant of her interests and participates in each and every them. As your daughter grows up, she feels safe and supported in all of her passions. It's one of his biggest strengths as a parent.

Jumin will always give his daughter a proper goodbye before departing for work, and she will always be the very first person to welcome him back home at the door. Her happy hugs and good luck wishes leave him motivated for a new day ahead, and her excited exclamation of 'Daddy!' when he finally gets home melts away all the stress he has endured in an instant. She's really his little ray of sunshine, and knowing he has someone waiting for him back home is a thought he treasures up to this day.

Ladtly, he keeps all of her small crafts and drawings she makes for him in his office. His favorite thing ever is certain crafts that he can wear and actively fiddle with. Be it bracelets, rings or maybe paper flowers. It's yet another way of keeping himself grounded, only that much more meaningful, as it reminds him of his little girl. He finds Elizabeth the 3rd to be an inherent source of comfort in a similar way.

#mystic messenger #mysmes #mysme #mm #jumin han #han jumin #jumin x reader #uhhhhhh genuinely didn't plan for this to get so long but here they are #it's girl dad jumin hours on this blog now i suppose!

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techav · 11 months

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VCF Southwest

This was the first time I've been able to attend a VCF, and it was the first held in the Dallas area in over a decade. I was lucky enough to participate as both event staff, helping to plan and run the show, and as an exhibitor. It was exhausting, it was overwhelming at times, and I nearly lost my voice by the end of the first day ... But it was also an incredible experience and I really enjoyed it.

I brought a few of my projects to show off. First and foremost was my Wrap030-ATX project, which I paired with a Wyse WY-30 terminal I rescued from Computer Reset, and had running a demo program for printing names on my recently-repaired Apple ImageWriter II/L. Next to that was my Wrap030 board stack running a Mandelbrot fractal renderer using its 68882 FPU and video generator cards. Then came the Mac SE from Computer Reset I repaired, with my SE-VGA card driving an external monitor, and running Oregon Trail (always a crowd favorite!). Finally I had my Franken-Plus, which sadly suffered a power supply failure early on the first day and sat dark all weekend.

My exhibit was situated just down the row from @commodorez , who won the show's Best Microcomputer award for his "VICs that aren't 20" exhibit of rare and lesser-known Commodore computers. Across from Commodore-Z was Usagi Electric, who won Best in Show for his exhibit of the Centurion, a PDP-11, and his vacuum tube computer.

I had a great time talking to Commodore-Z, @ms-dos5 , Usagi Electric, Nybbles and Bytes, Macintosh Librarian, Retrotech Chris, Kevin & Michael of the Turbo 9 Team, Al Williams, and so many more wonderful people that I couldn't even begin to catch names for.

I also got to go into deep-dive discussions on very specific details about my projects with people who already knew so much more about the components and the tools that I'm using than I do. It's energizing to be around people that understand the work that goes into these projects and appreciate what I've accomplished.

The show was so much bigger than I anticipated. Including staff, volunteers, sponsors, speakers, exhibitors, and attendees, we saw nearly 900 people come through the main hall over the course of the weekend. Seminars were full, with CuriousMarc's presentation on Restoring the Apollo Guidance Computer forming an imposing line for entry well ahead of the scheduled start of the talk. We had incredible community turnout; it was great to see entire families come through with awestruck small children in tow.

There was so much to see and do, so many people to talk to. The entire weekend is just a blur. My brain is still trying to process everything from the show.

One thing does stand out though — an unbelievably generous act from someone I spoke to on Saturday about my homebrew builds and my methods for testing and debugging. This kind soul was so impressed by what I have accomplished without an oscilloscope that he bought one from the VCFSW charity auction and gave it to me on Sunday. I was so surprised I didn't think to even get his name before he disappeared into the crowd. I can't wait to put it to good use, and I hope that what I build with it lives up to his expectations.

Following VCF East earlier this year, Bil Herd said something about riding that high from VCFE, and that prompted him to agree to come out to join us at VCFSW this year. Now that I've experienced it for myself, I understand what he meant. I've been looking though all the pictures and blog posts everyone has been sharing, and catching up on recordings of the presentations I missed. Interest in some of my projects has me thinking about what I can do with them next. It's exciting.

I can't wait until next year.

#vcf southwest #vcf #vcfsw #vcfsw 2023 #vintage computer festival #vintage computing #retro computing #wrap030 atx #SE-VGA

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faithinlouisfuture · 3 months

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what do you think it is about louis that elicits such emotional involvement from fans? i’ve rarely ever seen it with any other artists and I follow/stan many

i can only answer this from my own perspective, i’m sure that if you asked other fans they might have different answers… for me first and foremost it’s his art; and by that i mean primarily his lyrics - i feel a strong connection to them, and that makes me feel a connection to the artist they came from… they’re a source of comfort and self expression for me, so that sense of comfort and similarity i get from the lyrics and music automatically extends to the person who made them

but by art i also mean the art/design elements he chooses to connect with his music (merch/ graphic design/ music videos/ lyrics videos/ obvious inspiration materials etc) and his musical/artistic persona (his personal fashion sense, his fashion brand), his overall design aesthetic - its right up my alley and it’s something that i’ve identified with before i even found louis so his being similar to mine is just another layer of why i connect with him

another very important thing to me is his morals, or what i can gauge of his morals from how he conducts himself publicly (both professionally & as much as he chooses to share personally) - i’m a firm believer of NOT separating the art from the artist

one of the reasons i first started to look into louis outside of his music was because of the interactions i saw of him with his fans, these were always so warm and borderline friend group 🥹 and i personally had not seen an artist of his level who treated his fans the way that he does, so that’s something that pulled me in too

and realistically speaking, it’s also the fact that once you become a fan and start to look into “all the content” from his past, you find SO MUCH! so much going back to SO many years, and it gives you this sense of “knowing him” because you see what he was like over so many years, you feel like he’s someone you’ve known for a while… that’s something that you normally don’t get with a lot of other artists because they haven’t in fact been in the public eye for THAT long and their every move hasn’t been documented to the nth (and frankly sometimes unhealthy) degree of detail

stemming from that previous point, it’s also the different layers of fandom content involvement available when it comes to louis - not every artist has active update accounts that report on their literal every move, fashion UAs that document the details of their every outfit, fans who actively gif their public appearances/ music videos/ concert livestreams etc, fans who create art & artistic edits of other types related to the artist, there’s A LOT to consume basically, and doing it amongst a group/community just makes it that much more fun & addictive

and last but definitely not least is the fact that he’s pretty as fuck (like disturbingly), with the most perfect ass known to mankind 🤤 anyone pretending that his looks don’t play a role in why he elicits this level of obsession from fans is lying to themselves and you

any way, i don’t know if this is the kind of response you were looking for but that’s my analysis of it… i honestly could go on and say more on the topic but i think i’ll shut up now

#anon #it’s disturbing how long this is #emmy rambles #why louis? this is why #👈🏼 i could have just directed you to this tag of mine instead 😝

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animes-trash · 7 months

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Servamp Secret Santa 2023

Hey hey hey Servamp fandom, guess what time is it ? That's right, the Servamp Secret Santa 2023! You'll find the form at the end of the post, but first and foremost, let me remind you the infos and few rules we have.

Important informations / rules

For those of you who never did a secret santa, here's how it works : it's basically a gift exchange online. We're not buying anything, but we're making Servamp related gifts such as fanarts or fanfics (or edits, or else, whatever you can make) and sharing them online. In the form, you write your wishlist and your no-no, and I'll communicate it to your secret santa. This is the only informations I will share, along with your username. Don't worry, your email will be kept secret.

It's a secret santa, so please don't reveal who you have (you might know them on tumblr) until the gift reveal. If you really have questions about their wishlist, you can write to me and I'll find a way to assure the communication while keeping it anonymous.

Let's talk about important dates now. The last day to sign up in November 30th ! Passed this deadline it'll be too late, which is why I'm opening the registrations early to everyone can know about it in time. Please, check out your mail inbox around December 1st. That's when I'll send you your secret santa (or maybe on the 2nd, depending on the time I have).

The last day to drop out is December 5th. Don't worry, it's okay to not be able to go through the secret santa, we all have personal lives with its problems and events. Just be sure to tell me as soon as possible so I can assign your secret santa to someone else.

The time for sharing gifts will be from December 24th to the 31th. You can give your gift at any moment during / between these days. PLEASE stay within this time period.

To avoid people being late, there was this thing that I saw on another server for fanfic writers. Basically, it was a time limit of 2,000 words (so that people don't plan too long fics then don't finish). I won't put it as a strict word limit (mostly because I wrote a 5,000 words stuff last year–), but I'm still putting it as an advice.

You can make fanarts, fanfictions, or edits. This is mostly what people do in general.

Let's use the tag "Servamp Secret Santa 2023" to share our works later. I'll also use them on all my secret santa related posts.

NO NSFW. This is a family friendly secret santa.

There is a discord server ! I encourage all participants to join (it's very useful for the gift-share there). It's also open to anyone. There is the role of "observer" if you want it. Here's the link, if you want to talk a bit with the others.

And I think I've said everything ! If you have any question, don't hesitate to ask in my inbox, by dms, or this post's comments. I'll answer as best as I can. Please, share as much as you can !

HERE IS THE LINK TO SIGN UP : https://forms.gle/m4bLbbjWQW9uHKdT8

#servamp #servamp secret santa 2023 #lawlicht #kuromahi #licht jekylland todoroki #shirota mahiru #servamp kuro #sloth pair #mahiru shirota #lawless hyde

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missyblogs · 1 month

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*smacks lips* so, today it occurred to me that there are exactly zero (0) x reader things for Robbie. This is a massive oversight that needs correcting bc this man can hold so many hugs and you cannot convince me otherwise today I offer:

Robbie and physical affection!

adapted from some writing I've been doing, based my reading of the character from some of season one and some info from a podcast episode -One thing that Robbie shares with his arch nemesis is the tendency to default to acts of service, something he neither realizes nor would be willing to acknowledge, but he ALSO is first and foremost a touch guy with precious little understanding of social norms or boundaries. Expect random hugs, hands on shoulders, back, face, waist, you name it! As long as he doesn't have to SAY the thing he is more than willing to snuggle you -Are you coping with a rough past? Do you have a body that tells on you for eating giant slices of cake every day? Good news! Robbie doesn't care. He will willingly touch your rolls, moles, stretch marks, and scars because they're what make you you! If you make an attempt to change any of that he would be very visibly disappointed. -He is a little spoon, he LIVES for being held genteel like borger -Don't like making the first move or initiating contact? Not comfy leading in ballroom dance? Robbie's bravado lends itself well to him taking the reigns, even if it's not his natural inclination. Show him the ropes and he'll gladly take them off your hands! -Do you need to make the first move or initiate contact? Not comfy following in ballroom dance? Robbie is more than comfortable being the one dipped, cuddled, and held. Following your lead is where he shines best!

-Robbie is very oblivious so he won't always pick up on when his partner is uncomfortable, but as soon as you communicate it to him, he will make every effort to fix that, even if he's not so great at it. The man sleeps in his chair with precious little covering after all. Be patient with him and he will learn <3 -Because he is very sensitive about his appearance, Robbie keeps his hair tightly gelled and away from prying hands... but he may let you touch it when its down if you puppy dog eye him enough. He won't admit it, but scalp massages DO feel kinda good after a long day of supporting heavy hair and wigs -Being lazy is HIS thing, you wanna sit with him for hours on end? you've come to the right man! Expect him to fall asleep in your arms though -If you have intrusive thoughts about people who didn't touch you kindly, are afraid it might happen to you, or want to be eased into the world of physical contact due to sensory issues with someone you trust, you have also come to the right man because Robbie is all of those things! He empathizes with you and feels even MORE connected to you because you understand exactly what he's been through. If you will be patient with him, he will be patient with you <3 - Because he is very inactive, his own body is surprisingly soft. He's got muscles, but he's also got plenty of fluff for your hands to find~

#lazytown #robbie rotten #fo x si #self insert #oc x canon #Robbie x reader #self shipping #YouRobbie #self ship headcanons #gn reader #x gender neutral reader #missy talks #still no gender to this so apply whatever feels right to you #eat your heart out 'phobes this isn't for you

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ao3cubi · 1 year

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So I saw the Super Mario Bros movie the other day and I have Thoughts And Opinions™ on a couple things (idk what counts as a spoiler but it's all under the 'keep reading' just to be safe) P.S.: Damn this got longer than expected 💀

First and foremost, we all know it's not a masterpiece. It's not meant to be life-changing, it's meant to be fun. It's meant to entertain kids who have little to no knowledge of the Mario Bros games AND avid Mario fans at the same time, and I think the movie managed to do it pretty well.

I've read a few comments saying they didn't like the pace, that it was weird and fast. Y'all. That's how you keep a kid's attention. Hell, that's how you keep MY attention (as someone with ADHD). It's colourful, funny, and has great upbeat songs that had the whole theatre smiling and doing little dances in their seats and even singing along! And most important: the kids were DELIGHTED, they weren't talking or walking around out of boredom AT ALL, they were completely engrossed in the movie, we all were.

And now that I've made clear I liked the movie a lot, let's move on to less favorable opinions, random thoughts and such.

They better be making a Luigi centric movie soon because what the fuck was that. Yeah I get the Main Character is Mario but you can't have Luigi 'disappear' from most of the movie AFTER BEING IGNORED BY HIS FAMILY AT DINNER. "He was a prisoner" well have him try to escape or something! I don't care! I just need him to be appreciated!

Also we know Mario trained but... when did Luigi learn how to fight for the final battle? [New headcanon unlocked: Luigi is a natural at fighting but tries to avoid it at all costs because he's scared]

Loved Princess Peach, what a girlboss. Would've liked to see her girlbossing even more but yeah. Chef's kiss.

MARIO AND LUIGI. Their relationship, how they care for each other, how fucking happy and relieved they are to be reunited I just-- flawless, perfect, incredible, 100000/10.

Bowser just wanted to be happy okay? I know that's not how one does things but... he was trying. I'm sad now.

Also Bowser's hot and the voice they've given him in Spanish was a great nice amazing surprise.

Blue Shell Koopa has a place in my heart now.

The Luma is Gen Z.

Luigi saving Mario and joining forces for the final battle? Sharing the star? I teared up that was so GOOD. (Does not make up for the lack of Luigi in the rest of the movie but it's a good start.)

Still not over the cuteness of the second post-credit scene.

Loved the bowuigi scenes, didn't know that much bisexuality could be conveyed in so little time. Another win for the community. Hey Nintendo I've got a few ideas for a Bowuigi movie if you're interested.

The DK & Mario scenes are phenomenal and there aren't enough words to describe how perfect their conversation inside the eel was.

If you got this far, thank you for reading my nonsense! I hope you have a very nice day and you're more than welcome to comment/reblog with your own Toughts And Opinions™. This movie has me in a chokehold.

It has also given me ideas to continue the Bowuigi fic. Win-win.

#spoilers #super mario bros movie #bowuigi #super mario bros spoilers

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yieldfruit · 1 month

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i was curious your opinion on my friend’s situation:

my friend is in school to study psychology and go into research. one of her professors approached her to do a summer internship to work under the professor and help with her research. it’s basically a great opportunity for experience, networking, etc. the only thing is that the research her professor does is focused around the LGBTQ+ community (note: her professor is apart of that community). the internship would be to recruit people in that community to partake in an interview where they would share their coming out stories. my friend is a Christian, but when i asked her if she would do it, her only hesitation was that she doesn’t have any connections to that community so it would be hard to recruit people for the interview. as a Christian, should there be more hesitations for this internship? like is doing this internship supporting LGBTQ+ in some way? idk. i don’t think i would take the internship, because not every opportunity is from God.. but i’m not sure how to explain that to her or if i’m even right in that?

thank you in advance!

Hmm...I have friends in the LGBTQ+ community, but I would: never condone homosexuality, transgenderism, etc. or attend a wedding of such persons. Why? Because of love. Because the Bible teaches clearly and plainly on such issues and there is no skirting around it. I must honor God. Yet I have friends in that community because I care about them very much and like them as people, but my soul hurts for their destination and living apart from God and I cannot condone what God says He hates. How can I love and embrace what God calls evil? I cannot. Which is why I also cannot embrace a spouse cheating on their husband, sex before marriage, pornography use, etc. Sexual immorality is a devastating evil prevalent in many human hearts and it is our downfall more often than not. Lord, deliver us. And He does, but we don't respond. Anyway...back to your friend: I don't think it would be bad to seek people out and ask about their "coming out" stories, but I would not condone their choices. So I would have a hard time doing this project because I would have to bite my tongue and act as if I somehow condone this by highlighting these stories. The issue is this though: the root is that your friend is working with someone who is a part of that community and is 100% focused on that community, what did they expect? So I would not align myself in partaking in research/an internship with someone with celebrates willful sinful lifestyles against God's creative order.

For example of another sexual perversion: if I was to align myself with doing research with a professor who is a proponent of pedophilia I would expect that any projects with this person would be, in their own way, a proponent of pedophilia. I would be careful who I align myself with. We are to honor the Lord and His Word first and foremost: He will take care of the results.

Even though I care deeply about people who are homosexual, I love God more and cannot condone that which He hates. I have compassion for them because who would I be without Christ? Really, what made me to differ besides His grace and studying His Word and knowing what He teaches? What do I have that I haven't received? I have compassion, but I cannot turn my back on God.

"Much of our difficulty as seeking Christians stems from our unwillingness to take God as He is and adjust our lives accordingly. We insist upon trying to modify Him and bring Him nearer to our own image." – Aiden Wilson Tozer

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milaswriting · 8 months

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Hi Mila! I was wondering if I could ask some IF-world advice because you are so level-headed and thoughtful always.

I have a project I've outlined and have a lot of ideas for, and I don't know if I should start a dev blog to gauge interest now and get people interested and give myself a little inspiration to keep working or wait until I have some kind of demo. I'm a little scared of promising people more than I'm capable of providing because I have ADHD, and there's never any guarantee of deadlines with me.

If I at least have a demo, then if I stop working for awhile (or even abandon the project) then people still have something to play and go off of if they want to create their own canon.

But I've also been struggling with finding motivation to actually write and it might help to see how people respond to my idea.

I know you can't answer anything about my condition and I don't want you to or expect you to, you're not a therapist, I just wanted to ask you how you handle the pressure, I guess, that comes with a dev blog? Like have you ever been concerned about not being able to deliver, and if so, what did you do?

Hi! I have to say that creating a blog for my ifs was such a huge motivator for me. The fact that I put my idea out there, people engaged, asked questions etc. really encouraged me to keep going and keep writing.

First and foremost, you should always do something you enjoy, like writing, for yourself. But it’d be a lie if anyone said that sharing your passion with others who are enthusiastic about your craft isn’t a brilliant feeling.

I understand in terms of wanting to have a demo ready and available, but that motivation factor by having a blog is huge. Plus, I think it’s good to remember that you’re creating a work in progress—things are allowed to change.

Additionally, by being in the little if community and gaining a fanbase and speaking to other writers and readers can always be helpful for advice and ideas.

In terms of how to handle things; readers can be very understanding! I’m a full time university student, I write more than one if, whilst writing I’ve been through bereavements etc. and that can all take a toll on my mental health and how quickly you can release a demo/update. People are so understanding and that’s something to remember.

Alsoo remembering that all creators are in the same boat. We all go through imposter syndrome and wanting to deliver, and just knowing that there’s always going to be someone that wants to read what you write—whether it’s now or later.

#ask #advice

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system-of-a-feather · 2 months

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If you are still taking asks about your syscourse stance from anti endos (I'm a bit late) :

1. Excluding those who do not remember their trauma or do not believe it to be enough to be traumagenic, do you believe that endos are really experiencing systemhood and not some other kind of plurality or multiplicity?

I cannot understand how someone who doesn't have any dissociation could ever have alters. It just doesn't make sense at all to me, no matter what angle I look at it from, and I cannot find any sources explaining it either. I do not *not* believe that endos are experiencing some kind of multiplicity but I don't think it's necessarily systemhood, if that makes sense?

2. How do you not get jaded by some of the things you see happening in the pro-endo spaces?

I'm talking about things like people labeling themselves "trans-programmed" or "trans-RAMCOA" (and so many more), those same people often calling traumagenic systems privileged, and other people who keep spreading misinfo about OSDDID (for example, that you don't need trauma to have DID), etc.

I know this isn't the entire community but I rarely see much opposition to those behaviors, which makes me feel very unsafe amongst most pro-endos.

Honestly, I think the only thing in this topic is a lot of arguing over semantics and if words can be shared. From what I'm getting, I think you equate systemhood / being a system to being traumagenic / DID / OSDD exclusively. From the sounds of it, I think you seem to be open to the idea that they do experience multiplicity / plurality so I don't think we disagree there much. I personally don't think "system" and "systemhood" needs to be an explicitly DID/OSDD term but its also a debate I have very little interest in. I am cool with saying that "system" is a term that people can use regardless of their nature cause - to me - it's just a way of labeling yourself.

Also, while I am not sure if it is similar or the same as DID/OSDD alters, I honestly could see how someone could have disordered plurality without being traumagenic simply due to how prolonged internet usage can cause a dissociative effect, especially in situations where roleplaying features are around and those have been documented in clinical studies - particularly around the proposed internet gaming disorder and internet gaming addiction. There is a lot of research to be done whether the experience of DID/OSDD like symptoms late in age is anywhere comparable to the more traditionally researched and understood DID/OSDD that stems from complex and chronic childhood trauma - but it's honestly a pretty false notion that dissociation ONLY comes due to trauma. (ADHD has it as a symptom, internet usage has a dissociative affect on the self, substances can also do it, meditation also can do it) So I figure with the combination of developing research in developmental psychopathology and research into other things that can cause dissociation that we might honestly find other means of developing alters or alter-like experiences in people who did not experience the extended trauma often seen in our current understanding of DID/OSDD.

2. How do you not get jaded by some of the things you see happening in the pro-endo spaces?

I just divide "pieces of shit" from "people just living their lives". //shot//

Honestly, really though, if someone is being an asshole, bigotted, extremely fucked up, etc I consider them first and foremost their fucked up group and then the neutral or positive group identities they have second.

So if someone is trans-programmed and identify as endo - I identify them FIRST as a toxic and fucked up trans-ID person who happens to identify as part of the endo community. I attribute the trans-ID shit to their trans-ID beliefs and give the overall community the benefit of the doubt and good faith that the overlap is a Ven Diagram and not a circle.

Generally I like to avoid generalizing groups as all bad based on their bad corners, especially if I've seen the community actually make efforts to improve. I personally found the latter of the that statement earned with the good faith I saw in a lot of quiogenic and endogenic systems when the tulpa-discourse came up and a good number of servers and people made the effort to leave the appropriated terms behind.

From that point I went "aight ok" and divided the endo community between racists and people with no intent of improving themselves and their community and endos that just honestly want to live their life and are doing the best in their knowledge to not harm others.

TransID people I generally put in the same group as the Tulpa people and just click my tongue in disgust and block them.

But TLDR I just honestly would prefer to give the people that haven't done anything wrong a chance to just live their lives without hurting people rather than punishing them with the people that really don't care the harm they do. Just cause some people who claim to be part of your group are pieces of shit, doesn't mean everyone in that group both 1) supports and wants those people in their group and 2) deserve to be shunned, harassed, and treated with poorly.

#alter: riku #alter: fei #ask #asks #syscourse #syscourse tw

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thegyusorcerer · 2 years

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What is "romantic attraction"? From an aromantic spectrum person who has experienced it before... 💚

Within our aromantic community I always see questioning folks asking stuff like "how do you know what you're experiencing is platonic and not romantic?" or "what is a romantic relationship?" or, the most common of all, "what even is romantic attraction?" For everyone out there who has once been confused about the same things, who once asked this same questions and received even more confusing answers; I hope this helps you understand these concepts a little bit more 🥰.

To begin, it's important to remember that romantic attraction, first and foremost is a feeling. I know it may sound cliche but you really do "know when you feel it." Romantic attraction feels different in your chest than what platonic feels like. However, I will argue that there's also the option of the feelings you're experiencing being neither platonic nor romantic or an interaction of both, but that's a different scenario. Let me know if you want me to explain this too.

Description of romantic attraction from @arospectips an arospec person:

taken from this post right here!!

For me, there is no particular “symptom” that is diagnostic of romantic attraction. Rather, to me it feels like a different emotion. Something about it is just different, and calling it romantic feels right.

The first time I felt it it took me like a month to identify it because I was like wtf is this new emotion that i’ve never experienced before?? Why does my relationship with this person feel different, even though we’ve been at the same level of closeness for a while now?? So... that’s my answer.

Romance is a different emotion from friendship, like how frustration and anger are different emotions. They can look and feel very similar and it can be genuinely hard to tell them apart! And sometimes what i’m feeling is actually kinda in between romance and friendship, and then I pretty much give up on labelling it lol.

Another way to tell is, you can figure out what things you consider solely romantic and use those to determine if you’re feeling romantic attraction. for me, kissing someone on the lips is something I would not feel comfortable doing in a platonic context, so it is solely romantic for me. Then you can evaluate if you would want to do those things with the person you think you might be attracted to.

Many people describe romantic attraction as a "butterflies in your stomack" kind-of feeling and I disagree. Those are usually related to nervousness and feeling intimidated by the other person or anxiety and NONE OF THESE are things you'd want a romantic partner to bring out in you 😅. Romantic attraction is meant to feel nice, a feeling of comfort, of excitement, of feeling safe with someone and wanting to share your time, affection and emotional needs with them. There is the factor of "wanting to pursue a romantic relationship" but what this relationship looks like can be different for everyone, especially arospec people who may feel uncomfortable in romantic scenarios though there are many romance favorable aros too. It all depends on the person, whether romantic feelings include wanting a romantic relationship or not. But again, the baseline is: romantic attraction is a feeling (one you can't force yourself to experience 🥺‼️)

Romance shouldn't make you feel anxious or uncomfortable and if it is making you feel like this: maybe think about what you're really feeling and if you may be in/with a toxic environment/person... 👀. I believe romance is good, beautiful and healthy when we're able to 1) understand our feelings, desires and boundaries and communicate them effectively to our partner(s) and 2) we know that romance is NOT our #1 priority. What do I mean by this? Well, many arospecs have grown to understand the concept of amatonormativity and how harmful it can be. Therefore, we give the necessary attention and importance to our romantic relationships BUT we also know that our friendships and familial relationships do not take a second place to the romantic ones. You c say they all share the same spot in our list of priorities. That's what I mean by a healthy romantic relationship 🥰. All our relationships are and should be just as valuable, necessary and a priority.

Romantic attraction is a pull you feel towards a specific person, you may think about them constantly, wonder what it would be like to become closer to them (emotionally and physically), maybe you'd like to be physically affectionate with them (hugging, cuddling, holding hands, etc), you may feel a desire to spend your free time with them and get to know them deeply, and as stated before: wanting to commit to a relationship with them and do romantic things with them (like calling each other pet names, going on dates, kissing them, having sex, etc). I must specify that the things previously mentioned that may be "romantic" are subjective, some can argue this are platonic too etc. And to that I say ABSOLUTELY! In the end, you and your partner(s) decide what to do or not do in your relationship and wether you label it romantic or not is absolutely up to you! Whatever makes you all happy 🤍.

Description of what romance is and feels like from @sapphicprincessjulia , a demiromantic person:

Romance to me takes time. There is no love at first sight but love cultivated over months or perhaps years. Romance to me is a feeling of safety. A knowledge that I could tell someone anything about me, my thoughts and fears and feelings, and they wouldn't judge me in the slightest. They'd embrace me. Perhaps quite literally. Romance to me is contentment. Not the exhilarating and dramatic ups and downs but an ongoing knowledge of comfort. I'm comforted by their presence. Their thoughts and their words. More comfort radiates from them than anyone else in existence. Romance to me isn't instantaneous, but once it develops, it blossoms into the prettiest flower in the entire garden.

To finish off, I must repeat that romantic attraction is different for everyone. Why? Because it is subjective. People will tell you "romantic attraction is wanting to do romantic things or have a romantic relationship with someone" but what IS romantic for you? It can be different to what I consider romantic bc of cultural context, personal desires, boundaries, etc. For some people romantic and sexual feelings go together, for others romantic feelings don't involve anything sexual and for others romantic feelings are not present at all. So have in mind that romance and romantic attraction can differ from person to person and if you're still confused or questioning if what you're feeling is romantic or not, ask yourself this question: do you want it to be romantic? Why or why not? If what you're feeling IS indeed, romantic: does it make you uncomfortable? Does it make you excited? Does it make you feel indifferent or "whatever"? Why? Ask yourself these questions.

"Picturing myself in a romantic scenario with ______ makes me feel ______" and ask yourself why. That's my best advice! I hope all of this has been helpful to read and that you've understood a little bit more the concepts of romance, romantic attraction and it's nuances ☺.

#what is romantic attraction #from an arospec point of view #aro #aromantic #actually aro #actually aromantic #aro pride #aromanticism #arospec #aromantic spectrum #aromantic positivity #queer #💚🤍🖤#june's post ⭐

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zenkindoflove · 1 month

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How did you get people interested/willing to read your fics when you first started? I enjoy writing for myself but I get discouraged when no one interacts with my stuff in any way.

Aww anon I really want to hug you. 🫂 I'm sorry you're getting discouraged.

I want to answer your question with care as I think that this is a very complicated question and emotionally hard for a lot of writers. First, you are not alone in wishing for engagement and not getting it back. This happens a lot. I would argue that in fandoms as saturated as ACOTAR, which I think you must be in if you're sending anons to me, it's actually quite hard to get noticed. At least in terms of my own 20 years of experience in fandoms, the ACOTAR one is huge. My early experience writing in fandoms were for much smaller, niche fandoms. Small fandoms are a lot easier to get people interested in your stuff because there is demand but not a lot of supply. So a lot of people are just grateful for having anyone write something.

I would say that is not the case in ACOTAR as has not been the case in other large fandoms I've written in. This fandom in particular has so many factions throughout the community of what sort of flavor of fan someone is. I imagine if you find a very specific niche, then it can feel like a smaller fandom but ultimately there is just so much content being made. It's hard for people to keep up and they will find a few writers they like and stick to reading their stuff and only their stuff. Basically if you have a preference someone probably writes for that.

So, how do you get people to interact? I think the real way is to make friends. Which is harder to do than to say. But when I first started writing 20 years ago, I quickly made friends with some other fanfic writers whose stories I liked. We commented on each other's fics and through our friendship we became invested in each other's writing. And when you have friends who will hype up your work and share it, that also can help others give your stories a chance.

I do want to emphasize something though. You should keep writing for your own happiness. I know, comments and likes/kudos are like drugs. It feels so so good to have people see your work and comment. But do not think if people aren't reading or commenting it means you're doing something wrong. There are a lot of reasons people won't comment. People read stuff all the time that they genuinely enjoy and then...just move right along. It takes effort to leave a thoughtful comment and sometimes people get lazy. At the end of the day, if you get enjoyment out of writing, you should do it. It's easy to compare yourself to others. You should keep in mind if you are just starting out, some of the people you are comparing yourself too have been writing for years, maybe even decades. They have a lot of experience under their belt when it comes not only to story crafting but also what their voice is. And once you know your voice, and you feel comfortable writing from that place, I think it can bring others to see your vision too and want to read more. So never stop writing. Even if you don't share everything, write if it calls to you. The more you write, the better you get at it just like any skill.

I do understand the discouragement though. I feel it too as I am not immune to the siren call of following my AO3 stats and checking my Tumblr notes. It's natural to want acknowledgement and praise for something you put a lot of creativity and effort into.

I think one thing to keep in mind, to sort of inoculate your brain a bit from the discouraging voice, is to remember that fandom and creating fanworks is first and foremost, a community exercise. In some ways, fandom never changes, but I have noticed some differences in it since I started back in 2006. Social media and chasing views and engagement has become very engrained in our online culture in a way that didn't exist back then. And I think some of that thinking has leeched into how we see ourselves as creators. We now have this idea of a "content creator" which is sort of this demonic, capitalistic creature in our psyche that uses relatability and parasocial connection to pull us into buying things. I can see some of this creeping into fandom spaces, which I hope we can mostly resist as fandom - to me - has always been an anti-capitalist force to take back storytelling and art from the powers that be and make it something that belongs to the people.

So, that is a very long, probably too political way of saying that when you make the goal of participating in fandom to be about making friends and connections and sharing things with each other that you make because you love it rather than seeking validation and entering the mindset there is competition, it helps with the very natural instinct we have to be liked and told we are doing good. But of course we want our butt pats. I know I certainly do. But when they don't come, I do have quite a bit of time and experience that tells me that even if I'm the only person who enjoyed what I wrote, that meant it was worth writing. The sting still happens but it's easier to bounce back from it and keep going.

So anon, I don't know who you are but you are doing good! You are doing something most people never try which is writing fiction. You are channeling your creativity and it's bringing you joy. That's the most important thing!

#anon asks #writing

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