#and the fact that raph is the one who is in tears when leo is recovering | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

marwhoa · 9 months

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request: You write the turtles boys so well! I literally can't stop smiling when I read your fics - they're so sweet and endearing. I was wondering, only if it strikes your interest of course, if you'd consider writing about the boys being jealous of each other when the reader spends time with them one on one? Like, maybe a slot for Leo where he thinks reader finds Donnie funnier? Or one for mikey, where he thinks that reader likes how big raph is? Or for raph, where he thinks reader is more enamored with Leo? Or Donnie, where he worries that Mikey is flirting with reader? Of course they're all misunderstandings, and maybe it could end all fluffy with confessions and comforting their respective boy? If not, don't worry, but if so, thank you! 1 look forward to whatever you put out next.

🝮 “ green with envy ”

rise!boys x y/n

author’s note: screaming profusely !!! eeeee !!! So hey yeah here’s a fic, this took a while because it sat in my notes for days before I finally posted it, my bad. This was kinda hard cause I’m not experienced in the realm of jealousy—hopefully y’all like it? ᗡ: also does envy even fit this scenario? Lmao I just be naming these fics any thing, can y’all tell?

word count: 6.1k

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Leo 💌

Leo never expected he could ever become… jealous, not him—no, no, NEVER him. He had too much pride, too much confidence. There should have never been any room for doubt in his ability to keep you focused and adoring on him, and him alone.

But, perhaps he had given himself too much credit? Or, maybe he had given his twin too little credit.

It wasn’t as though you were his. Just friends, and technically that meant you belonged to the whole family, not just him. But, no one could blame him for coveting you. From how starry-eyed you looked at him to how genuinely you laughed at his jokes, Leo found out too late that he had been falling for you, and here he was still falling. The way your nose crinkled when you laughed, or how your face lit up during Mikey’s dinner times, even down to the wheezing laugh you would give into if he pushed his jokes on too long, all of it spelled out lovely disaster for his heart.

But, fear not, he thought. He was the face man and the funniest turtle, surely there was no competition? No one could be better than him at getting you to make the faces you did.

Or well, it should’ve been no one. He wasn’t even all that funny, but Donnie managed to get you to keel over to some stuff he said—and he didn’t even intend for them to be jokes! A natural comic, can you believe the nerve of this guy?

So, yeah, Leo never expected himself to be jealous, and especially never towards his own brother, but god the way you were showing that tickled-silly expression to Donnie, wiping tears as he confusedly asked what was so funny? It had him gripping the arm of their couch, digging his nails into them. He wasn’t going to take this any longer! Sure Donnie meant no harm and would never try to swoop in and steal the prize he had his eye on, but Leo couldn’t help but still be… aggravated.

The pent-up annoyance was dispelled by the red-slider leaping over the couch, sassily walking over and snaking his arm across your waist.

“ Yeah, whatever, Donnie is sooo funny, but hey, Y/N, let me show you something better! ”

Never mind the fact that he had nothing planned as he twirled his katana in his other hand, slicing the air until a blue portal shimmered into existence. You glanced back and waved good bye to Donnie, fully intrigued by whatever it was Leo wanted to show you.

“ Oh—okay! What is it? ”

“ Who am I to ruin a surprise? ”

He cocked a brow at your question, tugging you through the portal and stepping out into the courtyard of the Witch’s city. While amazed, you wondered just what this had to do with anything—but, of course that was a comment you would keep to yourself until having fully exhausted the excitement of exploring not just any random town, but rather a town of witches!

“ Oh, Leo, finally! I’ve been begging you to bring me here for weeks! ”

Before he could even say anything, you were quickly rushing up to the nearest shop and sparking up conversation. Such a busy bee, but it was just another aspect of you he was captivated by. However, with such an impromptu visit to a rather overwhelming area, he found chances to spark conversation and get you to laugh to be stretched few and far between.

“ Oh wow, this store really doesn’t leave mushroom for walk-through, huh? ”

He gestured to a potions-ingredients shop, which, you guessed it, specialized in all things fungal-based. His shoulders drooped as you continued ahead, not even hearing him. That joke was gold! Huffing, Leo caught up with you and laced his fingers around your wrist, effortlessly stopping you in your tracks.

“ Mm? Leo? ”

You stared up at him with such a look of focus, all your attention finally fully on him, and he had to fight his legs not to reduce to jelly instantly. Instead, he took a deep breath, cocked his head, and insisted you follow him.

Down weaving alleys, through crowds of people, eventually you reached a park unlike any seen on the surface. The paths were lined with thick, luscious plants cultivated through the town’s magic. Foliage swayed with no wind, as though dancing like silk fabric to whatever music only they heard.

Your attention only left the plants when you heard Leo start clearing his throat and then flashing you a look that you recognized all too well. A grin was already tugging at your lips, and Leo finally felt like he was the only one in your world again. His hands held onto his belt and he kicked out his legs, faking as though he were tipping a hat. It seemed like some western cowboy impersonation?

“ What in carnation? ”

There you went, first with a light and short laugh.

“ Well I do say, I took a leaf of faith bringing you here,”

Which then melded into a series, topped with a “ Wait, Leo, hush—please! ”, all stuttered and peppered through your increasing laughter.

“—but, beleaf it or not—“

He wasn’t even able to finish the entire spiel before you were holding onto him, laughing with such a melodious voice. Which, of course, devolved into your trademark wheeze n’snort after dragging on too long.

“ Pwffhaaha!! Leo, wha-what’s with you today? ”

You wiped away a tear, and suddenly Leo was finally brought back to reality. Your hand on his forearm lingered, and he was just completely beside himself with how the glowing willows beside the garden softened your face ever-so-perfectly.

“ Y/N… ”

His voice was so uncharacteristically soft that it had you a tad bit spooked, hand gripping a teensy tighter. Your head cocked slightly in confusion.

“ I.. Ugh, okay, it’s—it’s dumb! But—“

He dragged his hands down his face, groaning exhaustedly.

“ I thought, maybe, you might’ve… Liked Donnie, more than me. ”

“ Huh? Why would you think that, I love all of you guys? ”

“ Yeah, but I love you, and—“

The shock painted on your face had him holding his breath. Alarms went off in his head, telling him he maybe should have held his tongue, not jumped ahead so quickly. The two of you searched each other’s eyes in silence, you recovering from what he said, and him preparing himself for what you would say. Soon enough, your face twisted into a confusion tinged with a bit of playfulness.

“ Wait a second.. You’re jealous, aren’t you? Of Donnie? What for? ”

“ What? What do you mean what for? You, you’ve been laughing at everything he said all day, don’t you think he’s funnier? Don’t you like him more?! ”

If it weren’t his dumb puns and act earlier, it was this that would do you in.

“ Leo, you dummy! Sure I was laughing, but that doesn’t mean I like him more than you, I just, well… ”

It was your turn to be a bit bashful as your eyes looked everywhere except him.

“ I, well.. You’re my favorite, Leo, not Donnie.. ”

As you batted your eyes at him, hoping he would connect the dots thoroughly, your answer was given in the form of his beaming expression as he swept you into his arms, spinning.

“ Ah-hah! So you do like me—and I’m the funnier turtle!? ”

“ Oh no, I shouldn’t have said anything, now you’re too powerful! ”

Playfully you cried, leaning back with your hand dramatically draped across your forehead. Leo chuckled at your antics leaning in to lay his head against your stomach as he tightened his hold firmly.

This was definitely something he would rub in his brother’s face later on—and said brother would be profusely confused by what brought it on???

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Mikey 💌

Mikey was the last turtle you ever considered could suffer from the classic ailment of “ jealousy ”, and you couldn’t help but feel both ashamed yet intrigued.

While you weren’t too sure what it was that had got him so riled up, you were observant enough to see the way his eyes lit up with a startling emotion. At first it was impossible to pinpoint, just a glimpse of something indiscernible yet startling that crept into his blue hues at the oddest of times.

The first time you had seen that frightful emotion peek its head was during a date. The two of you had decided to hit a bar late at night, him donning a cloaking brooch, of course.

When you arrived, the loud music was entrancing, luring you both onto the dance floor to get lost in each other’s arms. The music coiled around you both, closing the gap to a suffocatingly tight end, as if either of you couldn’t stand any sort of distance apart. The floor vibrated, from both the booming speakers and the music reverberating the whole building alongside the dancing bodies around you both.

Mikey beamed with the brightest smile, and you just knew he was laughing, albeit drowned out from the ambiance. You were both having the time of your lives. Absorbed into a bubble fit for only the two of you, eyes locked on each other, neither party was ready for the stranger’s hands that snaked around your waist, pulling you in without any mind paid to you already having a devoted dance partner.

Chills set in and you turned to Mikey instantly, locking eyes, but the look in his eyes was enough to have your voice hitch in your throat.

That night ended with you both getting kicked out after Mikey wailed on the guy, but after a while, you both laughed and talked all about the fight on the way home.

The next time you saw that look was when you were hanging out with Leo while waiting for Mikey to return back from patrol. He had invited you over, and you planned to do it after wrapping up a few things, so he figured he could finish a patrol and be ready for you when you got done.

Unfortunately for him, you happened to finish your escapade much too early, and thus were at the lair awaiting his return. Leo happened to pass by, so you roped him into a conversation to bide the time. When Mikey did eventually come home, he stepped in to see you nearly keeled over in laughter.

You had been laughing so hard that when you noticed Mikey, you gave a weak wave and continued dying. He was curious what the joke was, but Leo simply shook his head and left, his own laugh dwindling down the hall. Once you recovered and were on your feet, you caught that same scary emotion swirling in his eyes. He tightened his lips and only softened when he turned to you.

More and more questions arose as you came to experience this look time and time again in all kinds of situations, but the one that finally made all the clicks pop into place was his outburst after you were with Raph.

He had been taking care of some villains on patrol with Mikey when you had ended up in the wrong place, wrong time. Their battle had turned to a violent one, with the villain bashed straight into a wall. Debris crumbled down right as you turned the corner, eyes shooting up to see parts of the building falling towards you. There was no time to move, so you just closed your eyes shut right and braced yourself.

But, no pain ever came, just a bit of dust. You opened your eyes, seeing a huge shadow casted over your body, and when you looked up?

It was Raph, who blocked the falling debris with his mighty shell.

“ Raph! “

You yelped, heart thundering in your chest, and Mikey misunderstood the shimmer in your eyes as Raph rose to full height, throwing the concrete off and away. He misinterpreted why you hugged him so tightly when he scooped you up, taking you away from the damage and ushering you to run the other way.

When you’re focusing on the wrong things, it’s easy to get the signs wrong, and boy had the ache in Mikey’s heart got everything so totally wrong. You liked Raph, didn’t you? Why else would you look at him like that? Did you like it when folks were bigger than you, unlike him who simply had an inch or two on you?

How could he be so stupid?

So, that’s how you ended up where you were now, seconds from entering your apartment when Mikey met you with a sour look on his face. You noticed that same glint in his eyes, still trying to piece together what it meant.

“ Why didn’t you tell me? ”

His voice wavered, and you responded with a hum of confusion. Inviting him in, he closed the door behind you both. His lips tugged down as he searched everywhere for the words to say. Finally, he found them and settled back on you as you were putting things down and unwinding.

“ With Raph! You like him, don’t you?! ”

“ Wha? ”

“ You—You! ”

He seemed frustrated, wracking his brain until finally he threw his hands out and shouted.

“ DO YOU LOVE RAPH MORE BECAUSE HE’S SO BIG?! ”

Silence blanketed you both as you processed his words. Finally, you placed a word on the emotion you always saw in his eyes. Struggling not to laugh at the absurdity, you snorted and shook your head.

“ Jealousy! That’s wh—wait, no, Mikey, no, I don’t ‘Love Raph cause he’s big’ ”

“ Then why do you like him more!? ”

“ Where is this coming from, Mikey, I don’t like Raph like that—I like you. ”

You stepped closer, and Mikey let you in. Your hands reached up, cupping his cheeks, and he leaned into them with such a desperation that you felt bad for finding this whole situation so silly.

“ Just, you always seem so happy when he’s around, and whenever he saves you instead, you always.. ”

His eyes were elsewhere as he spoke, almost as though he were seeing the absurdity in it all now with a clearer mind.

“ Ahh, mhmm, yup, alright so Mikey usually people are very happy when they’re saved from danger—and I mean, I probably look happy cause I’m friends with him too, but I’m dating you, silly. ”

You booped his snoot, smiling as his eyes lit up with the love you were accustomed to seeing them full of.

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Raph 💌

If there was any one of the brothers full of insecurities, it would come as no surprise as the spotlight shone upon the red turtle, atop the winner’s pedestal. As someone who once led his brothers in the face of battle, who grew up with the elder sibling curse of forced parenthood, it came as no shock that there were a couple of problems sprinkled into his character.

While he had spent much of his life up to this point recovering and healing from what dared chip at his exterior, there was more than a few bits of stubborn grime that lingered on his surface. It ate away at him, leaving behind vulnerabilities.

Then you came along, and throughout the honeymoon period he experienced nothing but delights. Never had the negative Nancy in his brain perked up to talk her shit, misleading him in circles until he was a mess of unbundled, tangled up rope.

You were a light, something that seemed to power wash the grime away, cake over it with your delicate touch and sweet words. Much smaller than he, you were probably one of the kindest humans he met, someone he cherished more than life itself.

And that, in and of itself, was a vulnerability. You were his weakness, and the shrewd dark spots in his brain couldn’t wait for the rose-colored glass to shatter and let them sink their teeth into this beauteous opportunity.

The sensible part of him knew your kindness knew no ends, that it wasn’t limited or excluded to simply him or a select few. In fact, your sweet demeanor shared with his brothers? It was a breath of relief—it was an understatement to say he had been nervous to introduce you to the family. You were okay with him because he saved you, but his brothers and father weren’t present. They hadn’t been the heroes slamming down against concrete, scaring away the silverfish that preyed upon you one fateful night.

Turns out the trash-eaters had a hankering for good food, and you, all alone, on your way back home with a doggy-bag from Cleo’s Beach Shack, served to be the perfect target.

The night had been quiet, albeit suspiciously so, but your full tummy and weary limbs had their guard fully down. You daydreamed of the bed awaiting you at home, arms beckoning you forth with pillowy softness.

That delightful image was disturbed by the sudden rustling and clank you heard from behind. Turning, your eyes shooed away dreamland and were alert. An empty can rolled from a bush, tinking into someone’s trash can at the curb. Not a soul in sight, so surely it must have been one of New York’s infamous rats? Y’know, that creature that is practically extinct in this city, like there’s no way you would ever see them—definitely not at the metro nor the coffee shop, and surely never this residential street with primo rat hot-spots such as unsupervised trash cans full of food waste.

Yeah, of course, must have been a rat. You’re so paranoid, just hurry on home, nothing bad will happen. Nothing bad ever happens to pretty little guys like you, alone on dimly lit streets, lined with houses whose doors are locked to high hell.

Nothing bad, especially not like the cold metal that clamped firmly on your ankle. Never anything as worse as the chilling growl from whatever tripped you up, glaring with red eyes and flicking a long, sharp-looking tail.

“ Oh sh—“

Your voice feebly complained, raising into a scream to the heavens above as it lunged towards you.

Or well, towards your to-go bag, but who’s paying attention to the little things like that when your life is flashing before your eyes?

Thankfully, the end never came. There was the sound of a growling struggle after a tremor shook your shivering frame, and as you opened your eyes to peek at whatever held up your attacker, a silhouette towered over you. He casted a long shadow over you, which should have been intimidating as hell, but instead it left you feeling…

Safer?

In his hand laid two identical buggers, squirming and chomping with animalistic hunger. This had to have been worse than the rats, you’d take the rats any day, at least they weren’t massive.

… well okay, they are, but this is a whole ‘nother level.

The most shocking part was this giant hero taking a step back, assuming the position of a pitcher, and launching the creatures into the distance. There may have been a glint shining, and was that the cheer of an audience you were hearing? No, that was your imagination, obviously.

But you were not imagining this guy in front of you. Much too tall to be human, unless it was some basketball lead who somehow had balls of steel to save a stranger.

Every warning sign imaginable was washed away without a trace as your savior turned around and shot a shaky smile, warm as a summer sun.

“ S-Sorry about that, are ya okay? ”

He spoke with the timidness of someone a fourth his size, and you couldn’t help but be completely charmed to death.

From that day you would see him more and more, to the point that it felt as if maybe he had been appointed your personal body guard. Ah, but, you didn’t really mind, did you? You loved his company and his toothy grins. You adored his warm, gentle hugs, and it was too sweet how you could feel his hands tremble as they held yours ever so delicately.

So yeah, he worried to introduce you to his family, but the way you brightened up the room instantly had him starstruck. You’re perfect, that’s it. That’s the tweet.

The rosey glass shattered after a few lingering months of dating. His insecurities reared their heads, resting sharp grips on his shoulders as they whispered in his ears all kinds of falsities. You liked his brothers, but maybe you liked his brothers? Why else would you be so nice to them?

And, maybe that’s why you were smiling at Leo like that? Raph is right here, so why were you talking to his brother? He couldn’t even focus enough to heard you both holding the most mundane conversation ever about some shop that opened up over on Moore’s. He steeped in the tea of jealousy, filling his senses to the brim with worry.

The worst part about it was that if you liked Leo, he couldn’t even blame you. Leo was like water, while Raph was stone. Raph stood still, he could be bossy at times, while Leo was a spunky little river that would keep you on your toes. Leo was never boring, and he could keep a smile on your face for as long as the day lasted..

But he didn’t want any of that to be true. None of it.

The conversation was stopped by a meek voice asking for your time, attention shifting from Brother Blue to your beloved, clad in what became your favorite color in these past few months.

“ Y/N, can we talk? ”

Ignoring Leo’s nudge and teasing “ ooooooohs ”, you nodded with a smile, following Raph with a pep in your step.

“ Of course, dear. ”

That lead to the silence you currently shared—with him leaning against the wall of his room, gaze fixated on some smudges on the floor. That should be cleaned up, he thought, trying to not think of how you were sat on his bed, awaiting whatever it was he needed off his chest.

“ Raph? ”

You were the first to talk, already well acquainted with your love’s tiptoeing when it came to any sort of conversation that might be unsavory. You watched as he twisted his expression, tightening his lips—whatever it was, it was bothering him profusely, and you couldn’t help the pang gripping your heart..

“ Raph…? ”

Again, your voice seemed weaker this time. That was what gave him the drive to speak, he couldn’t handle leaving you in such a state, he needed to know if these worries of his were dumb!

“ Do you like Leo? ”

“ What. ”

Your response was so fast and curt, the product of being completely taken off guard with a left hook. There were plenty of other ideas you had for the direction of this conversation, such as having beaten his leftovers last week or how you have his favorite hoodie in your laundry basket right now. Maybe even the secret trips to Donnie’s, who was currently helping you get together a gift for Raph’s birthday next month. A particularly low worry even fretted that this might be a conversation about your relationship and how it should end.

But, instead it’s about Leo? What an easy question to answer!

“ Sorry, I didn’t mean that, I mean to say no. ”

Raph’s shoulders loosened and a breath of relief slipped out of him—when had he even started holding his breath?? Never mind that. You snorted at the absurd thought of liking Leo of all people.

“ Why would I like Leo? Raph, c’mere. ”

You held your hands out, and the way his hands fell into yours spelled out a desperation to be close to you. With a gentle tug, he climbed onto his bed, and you melted into his chest. A storm was brewing in his chest, his heart thundering nervously.

“ Ya just, Raph don’t know, something—he, just… Raph was worried, s’all. Afraid ya preferred him over a… ”

While he was searching for whatever word to insult himself with, you captured his attention with a gentle peck on the lips. Your fingers gently held his chin, turning his focus to lay fully on you.

“ Over a charming, handsome hero? ”

There was that adorable smile, peppering his lips as a light laugh erupted from his chest.

“ You think I’d prefer Leo, who is a risky little ticking time bomb, over my knight in shining armor? ”

He whispered a rebuttal, something along the lines of “ he really is, huh? ”

“ Oh Raph-a-doodle, never could I want anyone other than you. ”

Leaning up, you pressed your forehead against his and gazed into his eyes. They searched yours for a hint of deceit, for anything to latch onto and spiral about, but all he found was warmth.

Thus, the jealousy flame died out, and he plummeted backwards against his bed, dragging you down with him. He gave a heavy exhale as you giggled atop his plastron, scolding him for being so silly.

┆ ── ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ — Donnie 💌

The green of jealousy was a hue you never expected to be painted across the purple canvas you called your boyfriend, but surely there is a chance for any reality to blossom true, right?

Jealousy had sewn seeds far before either of you could catch on, oblivious to the roots which spiraled and narrowed vision to see only one option as opposed to the myriad of other reasonings. You had poured love into your dearest Donnie, so much so that you couldn’t even fathom any room for jealousy. How could he ever be jealous? Surely he knows full and well just how you look at him? Obviously he knows just how only he can pluck the strings of your heart, strumming love with each touch, in a way unlike any other.

Why, if you were Excalibur, then he was your King Arthur.

So, yeah, may the gods above forgive you for not considering a jealous Donnie as a reality to worry about—though, is it really too worrying? Your boyfriend being jealous? Kind of interesting, doesn’t it just trip up your heart into a flurry of skips?

No? Just me?

Anyways, you had missed entirely the shifting of his gaze when Mikey would enter the room. The low growl, the holding of his breath, none of it had appeared in your mind as you laughed along with whatever silly antics the youngest brother would get up to. Sometimes you would even entertain him! I mean, he is your boyfriend’s little brother, so it’s only right that you laugh at his jokes, get along with him, and all that good stuff.

But, jealousy was the type to hold someone still, to draw their gaze upon one stiff perspective and allow no other reasoning. For a man of science, even he was not above the laws of insecurity in relationships, so when he saw how bouncy his brother was around you, never did he contemplate the obvious. Nary a thought shall he consider that it was simply his brother getting along with his brother’s girlfriend, nor did he consider maybe you were being nice. No, the sour, bitter green dipped his head in the nastiness of jealousy, and all he could consider in this moment was that you must have liked his brother more.

Or maybe, his brother liked you and intended to steal you away? Why else would you laugh so heartily at whatever nonsense his brother spouted? Whatever reason was there for the times he would find you in the kitchen, fixing up dinner alongside Mikey? What else could explain you returning home with topside art supplies and personalized tips to his youngest brother?

Obviously the jealous mind of Donatello Hamato was going to omit one important factor: you did this with all his brothers. If they told a good joke, you would laugh. If Mikey made dinner, you were guaranteed to be in the kitchen helping by fixing you and Donnie’s plates to your liking. If there was something on the surface any of the brothers needed, you would totally put it on your errand run, delivering it during your next visit.

But, jealousy cares not for easy explanations. It craves the most dramatic interpretations, and in this case?

The juiciest interpretation was that Mikey had set his eyes on you, Donnie’s prized lover, and you had fallen for him hook, line, and sinker.

No, no, no, Donnie says, not on his watch would he let you be swept off your feet by anyone else.

“ Y/N. ”

Donnie leaned forward, fingers firmly locking with yours and giving an urgent tug. There was a thickness layered in his eyes that left Mikey shrinking away, confused as to what he could’ve done wrong.

“ Let’s go,”

Straightening up, he couldn’t help the grin widening on his face in a “ I’ve won ” type of manner. You simply waved to his brother.

“ You haven’t forgotten why you’re here, have you? ”

The look in his eyes caused your heart to skip, unprepared for such a heavy gaze that you hadn’t yet experienced. A nervous smile rose on your expression as you looked anywhere but the face giving you a look that would serve to make you fall even harder.

“ Of course not, Dee. ”

Donnie noted your refusal to eye contact, and instead of assuming it was one of your usual bashful moments caused by yours truly, his thoughts were plagued with theories of Mikey somehow worming his way into the heart Donnie swore was his.

“ Right. ”

He muttered in a curt fashion, leading you both to his lab.

The uncomfortable awkwardness blanketing the atmosphere had not gone unnoticed as you followed him, thumb stroking loving little hearts upon the upside of his palm. Usually he would meet this with a firm squeeze, but you could recognize when your genius had his mind up in the clouds. He wasn’t even paying attention to you, was he?! And to think you came all this way to entertain his experiments, hoping to get a kiss or two, only to be met with unnecessary coldness?

What the heck, man?

“ Prepare to behold the wondrous creations of the genius, Donatello. ”

Whatever stink he had been brewing in just seconds prior had evaporated as he unveiled his newest creation: an air-fryer that could quite literally create anything from thin air.

You tried to ignore the distant shout of the youngest brother, something along the lines of “ Hey! Where’s the air-fryer?! ”

Donnie had not ignored it, nor had he dismissed the stifled laughter from you that he surely knew the cause of. His hands clenched, wrapping into crossed arms as he leaned his weight into the table.

“ Annoyed sigh. ”

While rolling his eyes, he muttered an annotation to the peeved groan slipping his lips. There it was again, you noted with a narrowed gaze, that odd discontentment he’d been soaking in this night.

“ Alright, spill it. ”

You mirrored his lean, relying on one of the structural pillars in his lab to hold your weight. Your fingers thumped impatiently against your bicep as your eyes soaked in Donnie’s body language. He seemed to stiffen, either nervously or defensively, you didn’t know.

“ Spill what? ”

He spoke with such an accusatory tone that you were almost ticked off. You held your tongue, hoping to keep this civil and not devolving into mindless argument.

“ Spill wh—?! ”

Sputtering, your hands gestured wildly before quite literally framing him. He knew what you meant, he wasn’t dumb!

“ Whatever is making you so, so—so THIS! ”

His brow raised, and he almost seemed insulted as you threw your hands up with a frustrated growl.

“ Why are you so upset with me right now? What did I do? ”

That seemed to do the charm of dragging out what you’ve been looking for, the explanation, as he straightened his posture and pushed off the table.

“ Oh save me the innocent act, Y/N,”

Confusion painted your face, and for a moment he physically faltered, unsure to continue after such a clear display of hurt across your pretty face. After a second, his mouth tugged into a frown, shaking off the hesitation to continue his claim,

“ I know you like Mikey, so just do us both a favor and go scurry along after him. ”

Donnie waved his hand off, pointing to the door. Whatever look you had on your face at that moment must have embodied just how deeply the pain in your heart crawled, right on down to your very core, because he seemed to balk at his own words. A bit of regret wrapped around him as he muttered something too low for you to hear.

Tightening your lips, you straightened this time and took a few steps to close the gap between you and him.

“ You will not talk to me like that, and what’s this about me liking Mikey? Your little brother? ME? You think I like him?! ”

There was no way, right? He couldn’t be serious? You, liking Mi—he might as well have been your brother too! You could never like him over Donnie?! What an outrageous claim, you thought, standing your ground in front of Donnie. This could have been avoided if he had just not been such, such a…

“ Obviously! Why else would you be bringing him gifts and helping him out in the kitchen? ”

You opened your mouth to speak, only to be interrupted as he continued with an accusatory finger pointing no where specific.

“ And I’ll have you know that I have read about ‘Cooking together’ and I know how much of an intimate bonding experience it is! ”

The childish stomp he gave, throwing his fists against his sides stiffly, served to diminish almost all the frustration bubbling up. You snorted at the sight, causing him to loosen up, confusedly tripping over his words to sputter out a “ Wh-What, what is this, what’s so funny? ”

“ … You’re a riot, Dee. ”

Wiping away the tiny tears pricking from such a hearty laugh, your eyes met his with less of anger and more of the warmth he was far too familiar of.

“ Since apparently I’m the only one of us with some sense, I’ll have YOU know that I do that for all of y’all! ”

Sheepishly, he seemed to curl into himself as you poked your index finger right into his plastron to emphasize the “ you ”.

“ I bring you gifts all the time—April, Raph, Leo, hell, even Splinter, too! ”

Jealousy was starting to burn away, leaving behind the bashful shame as he started to finally contemplate the more reasonable explanations for your behavior. Silently he condemned himself for starting up this whole dumb debacle with such a blatant disregard to the facts.

“ And of COURSE I help Mikey with cooking. You have a specific palette that he doesn’t always remember fully, so it’s up to me to make sure you get a fulfilling meal you’ll actually eat, dummy! ”

Ah, now that was the part that did him in, something he didn’t even know. Just as you were going to continue, he stepped closer.

“ Wait, you do? ”

“ I do—do what? I said a lot of things, Donnie, be specific. ”

Derailed, you stumbled over your claims, lost suddenly at which point he had cling to.

“ I thought Michael was just inconsistent in his preparation of my dishes, but since you say that, I do recall my meals being much better when you were around. ”

His hands had found their way upon your shoulders as he spoke, gaze flitting all across the lab as he collected his thoughts.

“ I had suspected meals were just better when you were around because, well.. ”

You softened as his gaze fell onto you.

“ Because you were there.. ”

Silence fell upon you both, except more comfortably this time. He exhaled deeply, marked with his trademark “ relieved sigh ” then smiled at you.

“ Oh Y/N, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to drag you into such a ridiculous argument. I was just… ”

“ You were just… Jealous? ”

Your teasing gaze was searing through him, so much so he shut his eyes tightly and groaned annoyedly.

“ As much as I would wish to not admit it, yes. I may have been experiencing,”

He waved his hand in the air, as if collecting his words.

“ Jealousy, towards your interactions with Miguel.. ”

Donnie was relieved as you laughed away all his worries, leaning in to plant a kiss on his lips. The moment lingered for a few, as if desperately needed to mend this situation, stopping only when you pulled away.

“ Alright, you’re forgiven… For now—BUT! Next time just talk to me, dummy, you got me all riled up for no reason. ”

With that, you gave a playful shove that had him gasping as though he were insulted, and quick to rush to his experiment’s side with more questions than he could keep up with.

Not like he hated an attentive and questioning audience, though. Much appreciated.

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yorshie · 7 months

Note

Heyy idk if you've already done it but can I request clothes that the bayverse boys just love seeing you in? Like besides lingerie (though who doesn't like a cute lingerie) I mean like more mundanish things. A certain pair of shorts/pants/skirt, a certain dress or top, a certain color of clothing. Something along those lines, yk?

Maybe it accentuates a certain part of your body, maybe he just thinks it looks cute. Idk. It doesn't necessarily turn him on (although... hehe) He just can't tear his eyes away/stop stealing glances the second he sees it, and you just know he's getting extra flustered if you catch him gawking 🤭

Hey Nonnie! Thank you for sending this in, I had a lot of fun imagining what each one of the turtles would like- I even asked some other writers what their thoughts were because it was such a fun ask!

The ask I sent to another writer - oops forgot to add this so the context makes sense lol

Donatello

DonBon gets flustered whenever he sees you in his color. He’s not partial to a particular way of dress in the grand scheme of things, as long as it’s some shade of purple, you’ve got his attention. But the thing that would really draw him to a complete stop, is glasses. Even if you donned a lens free pair, he’s going to stop and do a double glance, taken by the way the frames bring attention to your eyes. If you coupled the glasses with a purple shirt or an oversized hoodie, he’s going to go out of his way to get his hands on the material, though don’t be fooled, his real goal is studying you.

Raph

Raphie’s weakness is anything feminine. If it's floofy and a more "girlie" color, he's all on board. While he does love seeing you in his color, the one time you managed to get him to walk head first into a door because he wasn’t paying attention was while wearing a pastel skirt with a petticoat underneath. He likes the way the fabric swishes when you walk, likes how he gets a peek at thighs and calves when you move. He’s an absolute sucker for embroidered patterns and soft fabrics that give him an excuse to study the way your clothes drape and fall on your figure.

Mikey

Angelo likes your comfy clothes. He loves matching PJ sets and lounge wear, the kind that lets him catch a glimpse of your stomach when you raise your hands up over your head, whose sleeves you have to either constantly push up or the tanks that leave your shoulders bare. He’s going to get possessive if it’s any shade of orange, but he’s not too picky. If it’s your favorite, it’s his favorite by proxy, and he revels in the fact that you’re feeling good enough to be comfortable around him. Bonus points if he gets to feel how soft and well worn the fabric is during cuddling.

Leo

Blue likes it when you dress up, likes silk and velvet and tactile fabric that clings to you, loves it when you wear dresses and blouses. If it’s his color, from the darkest navy to a light robin’s egg blue, he’s going to make it a point to inform you how beautiful you look, going to use the praise as cover to rest his hand low on your back. If you’ve dressed up especially for him, he’s not going to even try and hide the way he’s got his eyes on you. Splinter finds it amusing that even his voice can’t shake his eldest out of his thoughts when his attention is centered on you.

All Four

Alright, listen, this Is probably the part that’s a little more risqué than the rest of these, but those that know, will understand what I’m talking about.

There’s a certain type of nightgown, modest in itself, that usually has a scoop collar and hits somewhere around the mid thigh length. It can be a lighter, warm weather fabric that floats around you, or a denser, winter weave that clings more to trap heat. Patterned, or solid color, it doesn’t matter, but everyone that has one of these knows exactly what I’m talking about. There is no faster way to make a man sit up and pay attention, then to wear it, and the turtles are no exception. It’s not sexy, at least not by today’s standards, but there’s just something about it that draws their eyes and will have them following after you.

#tmnt bayverse #tmnt bayverse x reader #tmnt leonardo #tmnt michelangelo #tmnt raphael #tmnt donatello #bayverse leonardo #bayverse raphael #bayverse donatello #bayverse michelangelo #bayverse leo x reader #bayverse donnie x reader #bayverse raph x reader #bayverse mikey x reader #my writing requests

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cupcakeslushie · 2 years

Note

You seem to draw Donnie covered in Spray paint (pink and blue) a lot. Why is that? What got him hooked to it and why doesnt he have to mix the colors himself?

(BIG fan of the angsty separated au!!!!)

Draxum’s lab is pretty dull color wise, and Three wanted to differentiate his tech from Draxum’s. Huginn and Muninn are the ones who buy Three his spray paints! One of those small, nice things they try to do to make the kid a little bit happy. Purple is Three’s favorite color, but sometimes they’re limited in what they can bring him. (Also the pink and blue colors are a nod to Jinx—It’s kinda funny that her colors, pink and blue, when mixed, make purple)

It would be maximum shock if they all met right when Leo and Donnie rejoined the family, before they kinda started their healing process, cause they’re probably the most different at that point.

Rise!Donnie would be appalled at AU!Donnie, from silly things like the way he accumulates layers of grime without a care—to the rude way he treats April. AU!Leo and Rise!Leo would keep a wide birth from each other and probably stick to a buddy system with their respective brothers just in the hopes that they don’t ever get left alone with the other (their bros of course conspire to do exactly that, so they can get to know each other)

Rise!Raph would probably be really worried about AU!Raph just cause he thought his brother’s make him stressed and tired? But between dealing with Leo’s anger issues, and Donnie’s…everything, AU!Raph looks ready to drop any second. AU!Mikey would love Rise!Mikey, cause he’s adorable, but he’s a little sad when he looks at him, cause he acts just like he used to, before he was thrown into the arena, so he tries to tone down the bad and make it sound more exciting so that Rise!Mikey doesn’t know how horrible AU!Mikey had it.

The Kraang would def be the Rise Kraang version. The movie would take place a little while after the defeat the Shredder. I’m still working out the timeline cause when I was first deciding their ages, I forgot about the two years from the end of the series and the start of the movie 🙄. So I’m doing some reworking on that end. I think I’ll either change them to be a few years older at the start of the AU than I made them, OR the AU and the fight with Shredder will go for a longer stretch of time than it did in the series. That way there’s not a huge two year gap of unknown time between Shredder’s defeat to the start of the movie. EDIT Now that we know the series took place over two years and it was only a couple months between the finale and the movie. Their ages are gonna be the ones listed on their character charts!!

I’m still not even sure if I’ll manage to make it that far, but hopefully we will get there eventually! Cause I really wanna get to Casey. In fact, I’d probably make it less about Leo growing into a more serious role (cause obviously he’s already there), and more about him really accepting the love of his family. We might even see a future Leo come back with Casey?? It would be so hard not to go that route cause I love that idea so much 🤣

But I honestly don’t know yet what I’d really like to do. And I’d hate to give an answer that I’d have to redact later. I’ve got a lot of ideas, but I can’t even think about them, until I put out all the other stuff I’ve got planned. So let’s all cross our fingers and hope we get there some day lol!

2012!Leo would go MOM MODE™️ EXTREME, 2012!Raph and Don would take off like a rocket with the intention of hunting down and murdering Draxum, Shredder and Big Mama, and Mikey would probably be caught between holding back tears and doing his best to tell jokes and ease the tension, or following after his brothers in their murder spree.

Basically as much as the 2012 boys would be thrown off at first over how different the AU boys are from the other versions of themselves they’ve met, they’d go HARD as the protective older bros. But the only one who’d probably actually appreciate it would be AU!Raph cause he never gets to be the little brother lol.

@smoldevelopingcookie @c00k13san2 @luvrbug @organisedchaosstuff @uniqueness351217

Separated AU tag

#ask slushie #separated au #rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt separated au #rise of the tmnt #my art #sep!au life #sep!au crossover

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eclipsedrgn · 10 months

Text

Left Behind (3)

Pair: Bayverse!Leo x Fem!Reader

Summary: It's been 6 months since coming back to New York. Will you forgive the Turtles for their mistake?

Warning: implied sex, mentions of sex

A lot has changed since you came back from supposed death.

Splinter has explained to the turtles about your death and was furious, they didn't trust you much afterwards. Unlike the other three, Michelangelo tried his best to be around you even though became cold and disconnected. He misses his best friend, you coming back was the best thing that happened to him in a long time. So the fact you barely even acknowledge him or his brothers hurt him a lot.

The first three months were painful for you and for the four turtles, you all barely spoke to each other and only you visit the sewers to see Splinter and told him news about the Ancient One and why you've come back to New York.

The fourth month is when Raph let his anger out on you. You were coming by the lair to tell Splinter the news your team will be arriving in two months time, you wanted to ask him for permission to have Gojo and Geto over at the lair to discuss planning when you encountered Raphael leaning against the entrance of the lair. You gave him the cold shoulder and was about to go around when he yelled at you, telling you how much you've hurt his family.

Which ended up you telling him the truth, how they all thought you were weak and you didn't bring anything to the team, how depressed you got and the only way to live your life is to move on and away from them. Raph didn't know what came over him as he presses his rough lips against yours, sexually frustrated for a while now, you responded as you wrapped your arms around his neck and his hands placed on your ass lifting you from the ground.

That night you unintentionally slept with Raphael.

The next morning, Mikey found you sneaking out of the hothead's room holding your jeans in your hands as you borrowed his t-shirt. And that day, you had a talk with everyone.

About you.

You all gathered around the dining table eating pizza, their usual meal, Splinter sat at the head of the table as everyone ate silently.

"I believe (Y/n) has something to tell us" Splinter announces.

"About what?" Raph says walking in, he snatches a cup of coffee and drinking it.

"Why I faked my death and came back alive" you stated, glancing at Splinter who gave you a stern nod.

You take a deep breath. "So... you still think I'm weak?"

The turtles froze.

"Here" you said bringing out evidence of the Foot Clan you've been gathering for a month. "Still think I didn't bring enough to the table?"

"Or are we gonna pretend that I've been nothing but an ordinary girl sitting on the couch doing nothing"

The tension thickens as you stood from your stop slamming down your hand. "I fucking sacrificed a lot being your friend, I never took you for granted because I loved you guys and all you did was talk behind my back how I'm worth nothing"

"I didn't say anything..." Mikey frowns.

"No but Raphael did, Donatello oh let's not forget Leonardo. What happened then? The hothead complains so everyone joins in?" You spat.

"And you!" You pointed at Leo. "You were suppose to have my back. You decieved me"

Another silence fills the air.

No one knew how to respond, even Splinter who walked out knowingly this is his son's responsibility. You angrily wipe off the tears gathered in your eyes, you hated feeling weak and for the past two years and a half all you've done is prove to yourself that your tough. You can handle things. And if things got all tough, you'd be find because you know you can surpass it.

"I have another month to go before I leave to go back to Japan" you announced.

"You're leaving?" Mikey said sadly.

"You just arrived. I know we barely talked but is there anything we can do to make it up to you" Donnie begs.

"You know it was just banter" Raph spoke up, his voice gentle, totally different from the night before. "We didn't mean to hurt you badly"

"Banter or not, its not an excuse" Leo said, standing up as he takes you hand. "I'm sorry I didn't stand up for you, I'm sorry that I didn't look for more evidence you supposed killed you. I'm sorry"

You gave him a sad smile, "I... I've been wanting to hear that for the longest time. I'm sorry I caused you the pain. Especially..."

Especially you know you had to save me those five times.

Leonardo wrapped his arms around you, as you hugged him back tightly and willingly. The others joined in, hugging you as tight as possible. From Leo's shoulder, you looked up making eye contact with Raph. You both knew what happened the night before was a fluke and won't be happening again, and you both knew, that secret will end up biting you back on your asses.

#tmnt x reader #bayverse tmnt x reader #lazywriting #notedited #jjk #tmnt #leonardo #donatello #raphael #michelangelo

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pandulce135 · 9 months

Note

Hi hi! Can I ask for Donatello x a fem reader who finds out this normally goofy and bubbly cinnamon roll is actually really smart, but has been hiding it because she's worried that people won't like it? Can either be friends to lovers or established relationship, go wild!

Notes: It's been a month but I finally did it! I really did my best here, I kind of struggled but like, I hope I can get at least a 3.5 stars out of 5 haha. I'm gonna start naming my fics like early 2000's FOB songs starting now.

Warnings: reader labeled as 'stupid' and 'dumb,' acceptance of a negative role, reader looked down upon, not really proofread, lmk if I need to add anything else.

Word Count: 1.8k

~~~~~

So Smart, So Dumb: The Role That Was Given

You bounded into the Lair of your turtle friends. A soft smile was planted on your lips as you made the walk through the dim and, quite frankly, disgusting sewers. Not that you would expect them to be clean by any means. Just a few years ago, you never imagined yourself taking frequent walks through the underground tunnels of trash water to get to your friends. Now you knew these tunnels like the back of your hand, not that you’ve made it all that obvious.

There were subtle things you did that made both your book smarts and street smarts nearly unknown to your friends. Mikey seemed to be the only one to begin to pick up on your small habits. How you always hung around in the middle of the group when walking through the sewers but knowing where each path led, your seemingly limitless questions about Donnie’s tech and the Hidden City, how you even asked questions to no one just to realize you knew the answer all along, and how you knew completely random fun facts. You even Googled a large number of ‘how to’s recently. Sure, there were things here and there that you genuinely didn’t know, but now you had the reputation of ‘pretty and pretty stupid.’

Less work for your brain when in life or death situations. That was arguably the smartest move of all- to work smarter, not harder. You nearly laughed when you thought that.

It may have bordered on manipulation, but what the turtles and April didn’t know won’t hurt them.

It wasn’t long until you finally made it to the Lair. The opening that held the boys’ huge skate ramps and was their general hangout spot held three of the four turtles. You spotted Leo lounging on the beanbag reading a comic, Raph was doing a set bicep curls on his bench, and Mikey was laying on his plastron and doodling away in his sketchbook. The youngest was the first to notice your arrival.

“Hi, Y/N!” He smiled his big goofy smile in your direction, which caused your own smile to grow.

“Hi, guys!” You waved enthusiastically.

“Y/N! What are you doing here?” Raph put down his dumbbell with a grunt before turning to face you.

Leo chuckled, his eyes not moving away from the comic. “They’re obviously here to see Donnie.” The smirk in his voice was as clear as day and you couldn’t help but let out a nervous laugh. Your hands flew to hold onto each other behind your back as you rocked back and forth from your toe to your heel.

“He said he needed help with something he’s working on.”

There was a pause before all three of the turtles in front of you bursted out laughing, halting your movements. You watched as they laughed at the thought of you actually being of use to Donnie. Sure it was an assumption on the situation, but there’s not much else it could be.

They finally finished, each of them wiping away a stray tear. “Hardy har. I’m glad I could be amusing to you boys, but I have to go before Don starts spamming me with texts.” As if on cue, your phone buzzed in your back pocket. You pulled it out and looked down at it. Sure enough, it was him. You faced the screen to the boys. “That’s my cue! Have fun doing… whatever.”

You entered Don’s lab just as another message was sent through to your phone. “Don, I’m here,” you announced with a chuckle, which caused him raise his head from what he was working on on his desk to you.

“I heard you speaking with my brothers, but I needed you here urgently.” He was suddenly standing and moved away to focus on a few pieces of material on the table behind him. Some thick pieces of metal.

“My normal job?”

“Yes, your normal job.”

Your normal job was handing him the tools he asked for. When you first started this for him he assumed you would know nothing about the tools he was working with. He was shocked when you were able to differentiate the phillip screwdriver from the flathead and star. At that point, you had earned the title of ‘the dumb one’ but said you were willing to help him. No one else volunteered so he cut his losses and allowed you to help him.

So, you made your way over to his desk to sit down on his massive chair. You were the only one allowed to sit in it. It was like a reward for helping him out.

“So, whatcha workin’ on?” You asked as you spun around in the chair in half circles, bouncing side to side with the help of your feet as stoppers.

“Oh, only my next big scientific advancement. Once I finish up this bad boy, I’ll be the next Einstein with my own Nobel Prize!” Donnie exclaimed, holding out his hand for a tool. “The drill please.” You spun in your chair to grab the drill off of his desk and set it to the forward option. You pressed the trigger twice quickly to make sure it functioned before handing it to Donnie.

His response didn’t answer your question, so you looked down at the construction drawing on Donnie’s desk. It was for the piece of machinery he seemed to have his mind set on building. It didn’t even have a title. A glance at the materials and measurements made you furrow your eyebrows.

“Don, I don’t think your measurements are right. Are you sure you measured everything correctly?” You asked, not moving your gaze away from the paper. You started working on your own measurements on the sheet of material next to you.

Donnie produced a loud gasp from somewhere behind you. “You dare doubt my measurements?” He sounded utterly shocked and nearly betrayed. “Scoff! When will you learn, I am always precise and correct when it comes to such-”

“You didn’t take into account the actual width of the material in your measurements,” you cut him off to show him the numbers you produced. You noted how his eyebrow twitched and how his stance stiffened as soon as you spoke over him. “Sorry I cut you off, but you probably wouldn’t have let me show you otherwise.”

Upon processing your words, Donnie let out a breath and loosened up. “Fine, let me take a look.” He snatched the papers from your grasp peered down at them. His eyes narrowed at the one with your measurements before widening slightly. “Wait a minute.” With movements so fast you could hardly register them, Donnie grabbed a measuring tape to measure the width of the material. “Holy mackerel, you’re right!”

You laughed at his reaction. “Don’t act so shocked, Don. It was an easy mistake to fix, and an even easier one to make. I’m glad I was able to look it over.”

“You act like you’ve made the same mistake before.”

“Adding measurements together in a workshop environment is difficult sometimes,” you sighed but you shot him a smile anyways. “But you’re doing amazing, sweaty.”

“Oh, shut up.” He couldn’t help but smile at your words. You noticed how you seemed to have such an effect on him. “You’re a lot smarter than you let on.”

“Yeah, that’s the goal.” You laughed as you leaned back in his chair and he furrowed his drawn on eyebrows at you.

“Wait, wait, wait… what?” He dropped what he was working on. “You were just acting stupid this whole time?”

“I have a reputation to uphold. ‘Pretty and pretty dumb,’ right?” You began swinging your feet back and forth. You noticed as Donnie tensed up again. “You guys aren’t able to stay quiet about anything.” You laughed out again, but it was obvious that is was more forced. “Plus, it’s just easier to do as told than come up with any plan in a life or death situation. It wasn’t that I was like, playing you guys or anything. I was just… filling in the role you guys gave me. I think I did a pretty good job.” You gasped. “Oh, I could totally be an actor, what do you think?” You looked at him with raised eyebrows and an expectant gaze.

“What do I think? I think you’ve had plenty of opportunities to show us how smart you are and prove us all wrong! Why on Galileo’s good Earth would you not do that?” Donnie nearly shouted and you frowned. “I, personally, would not stand that!”

“I’m not you, Donnie,” you stated blankly, a firmness taking hold in your voice. Donnie grew physically uneasy. “The reputation stuck. I didn’t want to deal with the aftermath of such a revelation. Especially now. It’s easier to just… let you guys think I’m a silly, goofy idiot.” You ran a hand down your face. “Let’s be honest, it was so much easier for me, the most.”

“Oh…”

“Oh,” you mocked. “It’s such a shocking revelation that I’m decently smart, I know,” a sarcasm seeped its way through your voice as you leaned your elbow on the arm of Donnie’s chair. Your head rested on in your hand. “Let’s just… get back to work on your ‘next big scientific advancement.’” You turned in the chair to face the tools again.

There were a few seconds of silence before he spoke up. “No.” You sat up straight at Donnie’s word.

“What?”

“Let’s do something else.”

You turned around to see the materials that were supposed to be used to create scientific greatness were all discarded on the table that was now behind Donnie. He stood in front of your sitting form and planted both hands on the arms of the chair.

“How about pizza and a movie? My treat.”

You raised an eyebrow as you stared up at Donnie. “Really?” You suddenly smiled. “You sure it’s not just an apology?”

He pulled away from the chair and turned to the the side with his arms crossed over his plastron. “Psh, as if… maybe… it is…n’t.”

“Oh, Donnie!” You gushed as you clasped your hands together, most of your negative emotions left in few seconds of the past. “So you can be thoughtful!”

“Hey, I’ll show you thoughtful!”

“Really?”

“Let’s just go, you dum dum,” Donnie grumbled out with flushed cheeks before pulling you out of the chair and dragging you out of his lab. “And yeah, I guess it’s my way of saying sorry,” he muttered, holding onto your hand with a tight grip as you followed him.

Your soft smile returned to your lips. “Thanks, Don.”

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flockofcrowsinaturtleshell · 11 months

Text

Why I like Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

(my part of the letter from my last reblog)

Up until about three months ago, I disliked the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. I saw the trailer for the Bayverse live-action TMNT and quickly decided I hated it. The live-action designs and the turtles’ attitude towards April felt gross, and I suppose that I, a young teenage girl at the time, felt like I didn’t fit in the target audience.

Flash forward to four months ago. I’m scrolling through my Tumblr feed – looking for Ninjago fanart and completely disregarding the target audience for lego ninja – when I see something under the “For you” tab.

It’s a Rise comic, but I don’ recognize it as TMNT yet. It’s a drawing of a scruffy-looking teenage boy, with long black hair and a hockey stick. He appears to be underground, looking a little lost. He turns, and before him sits a giant robot, deactivated and covered in moss. It’s a turtle, I realize, but I still haven’t realized that it’s a TMNT comic.

Then the boy calls his Uncle Donnie, who’s a turtle in purple. It’s then that I realize; I’ve been tricked. I’m reading a TMNT comic and genuinely enjoying it. I begrudgingly give the comic a like and go on with my day.

Over the next few weeks, I keep seeing more of the comic. To my horror, I’m actually enjoying reading it. One month after discovering the comic, I give in. I go to the first page of the comic and read from the beginning.

It’s the story of a family trying to survive in a world overrun by invaders. Their family is made up of four color-coded turtles who make up the nebulous concept of uncle-dad, their entirely human older sister, and the scruffy-looking teenager they-re all trying to keep alive. This family dynamic is one I quickly grow to love, and the comix earns itself a place in my heart.

And then I watch the Rise movie.

Skip ahead to the present. I just watched the Rise movie two days ago (it had me in tears). As I write this, I’m also trying to figure out a plothole in the seventh chapter of the fanfiction I’m writing. Just yesterday, I finished designing the skeleton of my yokai character (because why not. I love speculative anatomy). I’m still reading the comic, which just updated yesterday. I’m happy with my new interest.

I love Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles for the family dynamic. I’ve always been a fan of unconventional families, and I’ve grown a liking for color-coded squads. I enjoy how April is more like a sister than a crush for the boys to fight over. I feel a certain kinship with Donnie, as an autistic-coded middle child who loves to learn. I absolutely adore Raph, the person who’s had to step up to care for their siblings and yet hasn’t quite grown out of the stage of life where he’s just a kid. Mikey is so silly and adorable, and he reminds me of my younger sister; the youngest and somehow the wisest at times. Leo feels just like a character from the first show I ever had such an interest in (Lance from Voltron: Legendary Defender) and I think he’s pretty awesome.

I also enjoy the show’s unique takes on some things. I find it cool how the turtles are all different species. I love how this iteration’s version of Casey Jones is an energetic young woman from a rival clan. I find it interesting how Karai is a loving ancestor instead of an enemy. I love the artstyle of the show, where each turtle’s design is unique (compared to other shows where the only way I can tell them apart is by the color of their mask). I think it’s cool how the backstory is different from some of the other iterations, how the turtles were mutated on purpose and how Splinter used to be a famous actor. I think the yokai are awesome, how they’re like mutants but were there long before. I enjoy finding the little references, like the pictures of other TMNT shows on Donnie’s conspiracy board, or the fact that the source of yokai power is a Kraang.

I have so many questions left unanswered about the show, and I’m sure others do as well. I would love to see the return of Rise. I have no doubt that it would be awesome.

#unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles

– Crow

P.S. The comic I am referring to is by @somerandomdudelmao on Tumblr. I have no words to describe how much the comic means to me. Cass, if you’re reading this, thank you.

#rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rotmnt #riseofthetmnt #tmnt #rottmnt movie #unpause rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #unpause rottmnt #cass apocalyptic series #save rise of the tmnt

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phoebepheebsphibs · 18 days

Text

Double-Mutated Mikey

Chapter 7: Habituation

Continued from the short story written by @boots-with-the-fur-club

Prev || Next

"Did... Did Mikey just sign at us?" Leo asks, eyes wide.

Mikey repeats the motion again.

'Talk. Talk. Talk.'

"I think he wants to talk," Raph mutters.

"I think he wants US to talk," Leo adds, looking down at his baby brother. "You don't like being left out of the conversation, huh?"

Mikey shakes his head. It's hard enough trying to communicate when you can't say anything, but cutting him out completely? That's simply not fair.

"Sorry, bud, we just... didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

Mikey signs again, bending his middle finger so that only his thumb and pinky are pointed, starting at the top of his head and dragging down just below his chin.

'Why?'

"Well, we were worried you might get... upset if we talked about it," Raph says, glancing between him and Leo. "I guess we shoulda remembered you know ASL..."

Mikey signs again, this time at Leo. He touches his hands to his chest, pivoting them towards each other twice.

'Animals?'

Leo gives him a confused expression. Mikey tries another one, his dominant hand forming a small fist with a finger pointing, mimicking a tail.

'Reptile'

"Oh... you read that?" Leo asks.

Mikey nods, a small chirp escaping from his throat.

"Well --" Leo looks up to Raph, who is waving his hand over his throat, trying to signal him to cut it out, don't say anything!

Mikey follows Leon's gaze back to Raph, who glances away and whistles nonchalantly, pretending to be distracted by something in the back of the room.

Leo snickers and rolls his eyes.

"You have some reptile blood in you now," Leo announces quickly.

Raph and Mikey's heads both snap back to him. Both of their eyes go wide, both of their jaws drop, yet their expressions totally different.

Mikey looks astonished and intrigued, a soft grin presses his lips as he contemplates what this means for him.

Raph looks utterly terrified.

"We think that might be why you got so agitated with the cold," Leo finishes.

Mikey shivers slightly, his hands trembling from the chills as he moves his arms back and forth, signing again.

'Cold. Not good. We don't like it.'

"We?" Leo asks.

Mikey blinks before signing again to clarify.

'Mikey doesn't like cold'

Leo does his best not to be put off by his brother referring to himself as a plural or in the third person, and chalks it up to just the fact that he hasn't used sign language in a long time, and is mixing up or forgetting certain words.

Raph picks Mikey up from the floor, cradling him close.

"How about we get you back to your room where it's and nice and warm, hmm?"

Mikey purrs happily, snuggling deeper into the towel and nuzzling Raph's plastron.

The trio walk back to Mikey's traincar, where Splinter is gathering more blankets and pillows.

"Ah, boys! I was just getting the bed set up."

Mikey wriggles out of Raph's hold and jumps to his father, squeaking and croaking out noises of happiness.

Splinter chuckles softly, petting his son on the head. Mikey's feline instincts start to take over, and he circles around him, nuzzling his head against his legs as his tail wraps his father's robe. Splinter's hand stays still, allowing Mikey's moving body to flow underneath it.

He holds the tip of his tail in his hands, gently rubbing his fingers over the slick and smooth scaly skin. He can feel the spikier ones that raise up when threatened, making Mikey resemble a stegosaurus -- though currently they are smoothed down.

Michelangelo hums at his father.

Splinter looks down at him, tears in his eyes as he examines the face of his youngest son. His baby, his sweet little boy that used to make him all kinds of drawings for fathers day and his birthday and Lou Jitsu appreciation day. The boy who learned to cook so that their ailing father didn't have to, when his depression caused aches and pains that wracked his aging body and kept him bedridden. The toddler that would beg his father to watch him dance, only for Mikey to just jump around and spin in circles to the rhythm of a new pop song while Splinter would clap and cheer with such adoration for his little boy...

Where is that child? Is he still in there somewhere?

Mikey looks up at him, concerned. His eyes sparkle, the yellow-tinted scleras and the glowing red irises and pupils covering up what used to be a white eye with dark green iris and black pupil. The colours are not the same, but the life and energy behind them are.

Splinter can't hold back the tears anymore, but he smiles profusely at his baby boy.

"There you are," he mumbles, crouching down to hug him tightly.

Mikey hugs him back, his tail twisting around them both.

After a few awkward minutes of silence, Splinter finally releases Mikey, who starts running around the room again playfully.

"Purple gave me a list of some tests he has planned for tomorrow," he recalls, wiping the last of the tears out from his fur and whiskers. "Small things, like an eye exam and saliva swab. He wants to try a blood test, if possible."

"Alright. Oh, by the way, tell him that Mikey has an aversion to cold now," Leo informs him. "And that he CAN understand us. We figured out how to use ASL with him."

Splinter's eyes widen with hope as he looks behind him at his baby boy. Mikey ignores them and their serious-sounding conversation, and instead jumps up into his hammock and plays around with the pillow before jumping back down, still looking around and getting reacquainted with his room.

"Very well. Are you boys sleeping with him tonight?" Splinter inquires.

Mikey attacks his pillow, grabbing it in his mouth and shaking it with a playful growl.

"We'll stay for a bit," Raph answers softly.

Splinter nods, grimacing at the cushion being ripped to shreds.

"I'll have to buy more pillows, I think..." he jokes half-heartedly.

Splinter walks over to Mikey and kisses his head. Mikey mews at him and purrs happily, the tip of his tail wagging.

"Goodnight, my sunshine," he whispers before heading out.

Mikey makes a small call out after him, like a tiny yowl or cheery whine. He's calling goodnight to him.

"Alright, Mikey, I think it's bedtime," Leo announces, stretching softly with an exaggerated yawn to convince him of the lateness.

"Aaaaawwhh!" Mikey howls. It almost sounds like an actual word...

Leo is shaken by how human the sound is. But then again, it almost sounds like a sad cat yowl if you think about it.

"No buts, big man," Raph interjects, taking over for Leo. "You fell asleep in the tub. You need your rest. Pops just brought you all these nice warm blankets and comforters, see?"

Raph holds up one of the freshly folded sheets under the hammock.

"So let's get you into bed and cozy, hmm? Yeah? Sounds good, right?"

Mikey's brow furrows, though the corner of his mouth turns up. It's as if his expression is trying to say "Really?"

Despite this, Mikey rolls his eyes and saunters over to the hammock, wiggling his hind quarters before leaping up again. He slithers under the blanket and gives out a single chirp of satisfaction.

"Good Mikey," Raph says, coming over to rub his brother's head. "We'll see ya in the morning, m'kay?"

Mikey moans at him, his eyes wide and sad. He wants them to stay.

"Alright, we'll stay," Raph sighs. He could never resist Mikey's puppy eyes before. Now it's as though he's even more of a puppy.

Mikey beams at him, chirping sweetly and cooing lovingly.

It takes all of five minutes of Raph rubbing circles on his head for Mikey to pass out.

"Is he asleep?" Leo whispers.

"No doubt about it," Raph chuckles. "Kid is in slumberland."

"Good," Leo sighs, taking Raphael's hand and leading him out of the traincar.

Once they are out, Leo starts whispering again.

"We need to talk. Mikey understood our conversation, so we can't do private conversations in ASL anymore."

"Okay? So, then what?"

Leo tapped his head.

"Ninja mind meld?" Raph questions, making doubly sure he understands.

"Just for the stuff we don't want Mikey hearing," Leo answers, "or reading."

"Like the deets about his mutation, for example?" Raphael grumbles. "We agreed we wouldn't tell him!"

Leo widens his eyes and taps his head again. Raphael hears his brother's voice in his mind.

We agreed that we wouldn't tell him about the ang-kray. But I don't think it's that bad that he knows he has reptilian traits, do you? And like Donnie said, he might even know that he has it already!

Raph grunts.

Fine. You're the leader now, you can decide what we do or don't do in this situation. I can't stop ya. But... I'm worried for him.

Raph scratches his arm, a habit born out of stress.

He's... he's just a kid. And you know how hard it hit ME when I knew I had the krang in me... Mikey... I don't want him to hurt like that.

He's probably already hurting, Raph, Leo responds, taking his older brother's hands in order to get him to stop scratching. He needs us to be honest and upfront where we can be. Yes, I agree that telling him about the krang is probably not the best idea right now. But eventually he will need to know. We can't keep that from him. I don't WANT to keep things from him. If I can help Mikey understand himself, then I will.

Raph sighs.

"You're right," he says out loud. "I just worry a lot... about him, especially."

"I know," Leo sighs, pulling his brother into a hug. "But it wasn't your fault that this happened."

Raph squeezes Leo closer.

"...But it is."

Prev || Next

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moreausturtles · 8 days

Text

"the orange sun in the blue sky"

a/n: hi guys this is a rly rly old weirdly made draft that I made during my rly bad hyperfixation on the rise movie; i thought i might share it with y'all bc im somewhat proud of it? pls dont mind any mistakes i wrote it in a rush i think...? gl to everyone reading hahaha lmk what u think pls dont be mean

summary: leo and mikey are the only ones alive. they finally defeat the last of the kraang, but at a cost.

warnings: unchecked + unedited weird bullet point format; slight mentions of death/blood; one swear word?; very angsty and sad sorry :((

word count: ~1k

(imagine FINALLY defeating Krang 1 as a mission success)

- the baja blast duo fight the krang, lots of hard hits and close calls and they have the LUCKIEST breakthrough.

- krang 1 is on the ground and no longer able to move, all its tentacles are severed. its hanging on by a thread, one that leo is more than happy to cut.

- “this is for my family.” leo whispers, looking down at the krang in disdain.

- he jabs his sword into the krang's body under his foot, killing it in one motion.

- and just like that, it was over.

- leo takes a moment to breathe, like his body wasn’t letting him before.

- he allows himself to think, to process, to take in the fact that they had just won the war.

they won.

- a small smile grows on his face and a quick rush of excitement takes over his body

- “we did it…” he whispers, “mikey, we did it!” he repeats it, a part of him still in denial and acting like saying it again was going to convince him that the worst was over.

- but the worst was far from it.

- he turns around to mikey excitedly, who he thought was just quiet because he was just as shocked as he was

- but boy was he stupidly wrong

- mikey stood there, a hand on the side of his plastron with blood dripping from it then to the ground

“mikey…?”

- he tries to give leo a smile, but fails as his body drops to the ground

- leo’s heart drops along with him, he calls out his name and runs to him quickly and takes him in his arms

- mikey, even before his mystic powers, always had this signature orange glow radiating off of him. but this time, leo was afraid it was going to become very dim very soon.

- leo took his baby brother’s head in his hand—he didn’t care if mikey was fucking older than him (hc no thanks to his excessive use of mystic power), he was still his baby brother

- mikey needed medical attention fast. but they were in the middle of nowhere. no medical team. no backup. no hamato.

- “we did it, leo…?” mike manages to whisper out and smiled up at his older brother.

- “yeah buddy, we did…” the sniffling soon came as leo tried to fight back tears. he had known this would happen; could you really blame a guy whose family got picked off one by one during the apocalypse to think that way?

“i’m sorry, leo...”

- god, mikey’s voice shattered leo’s heart into pieces. so weak and trying.

- “hey,” leo uttered, trying to change the topic, “remember the time when you thought the gumbus was real?”

- this earned a very weak, wheezed chuckle from the mystic turtle, who had his eyes closed to visualize the fond memory

- “you did too…” leo laughed bitterly at that, feeling his little brother’s breathing pattern slow.

- “i did, yeah. it’s one of my favorite memories.” said leo.

- “mine too…” mikey opened his eyes, the memory ending, and looked up to see leo’s face drenched in tears. a pang hit mikey’s chest as he realized he was going to leave his brother soon.

- “hey, leo?”

- “yeah, miguel?” a playful nickname he hadn’t heard in years.

“you were always my favorite brother.”

leo laughed, genuinely laughed even though it felt like he was being stabbed in the chest tenfold.

- “don’t tell donnie or raph.”

- “i think they know.”

- both of them pause for a moment, neither of them knowing what to say or do. there wasn’t really anything else to do but wait. Each second leo spent trying to figure out what words he wanted to tell mikey. “I’m sorry.” “Say hi to them for me.” “Please don’t leave me alone.”

- mikey was his partner in crime and now he was just… fading. His little brother was dying.

- leo knew their time was running short from the way he was listening to mikey’s labored breaths. slow and trying. mikey thought about using his mystic power for one last push, to stay with leo, to make do with what was left of the world.

- they could rebuild it. it was easy for him to make things out of thin air. leo knows how to build and farm and haul and everything you could think of.

- but the mystic warrior was tired. they had been fighting for decades. he couldn’t lift a single finger even if he tried, and that was fine with him. he honestlyhadn’t felt relaxed like that in years.

- maybe they were better off not saying a word, mikey needed to save any air he could take in. leo kept his mouth shut just so he could spent just a little bit more time together in this bittersweet silence.

- suddenly he sees mikey’s lips open a little bit, and the next words that come out would forever leave leo wounded.

“I love you, big brother.”

- it took everything in leo to not break out in full sobs right then and there. he wanted to scream, beg, plead to the God that did this to mikey— if one even existed.

- leo swallowed the lump in his throat, forming the best—and last— smile he could muster for mikey, mimicking him the way he used to do it for him and his older brothers so they wouldn’t have to worry.

“I love you too, little bro.”

- leo’s little ray of hope slowly went limp in his arms. and he was all alone.

- leo kept mikey in his arms, still and unmoving. maybe it was his punishment for putting mikey in this whole mess. for destroying the world and his entire family. maybe a God did exist, it was just never in his favor no matter how hard he fought to appease it.

leonardo, the last one standing of the hamatos, defeated the Krang and lived, while mikey took his place in the sky as leo’s ray of sunshine.

#rottmnt leo #leo #leonardo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #michelangelo #donatello #raphael #teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt raph #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt donnie #donnie #mikey #raph #tmnt #rottmnt #leo and mikey #baja blast duo

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lykaios2 · 8 months

Note

You don’t have to do this, this is just me asking, but do you think you could do a yonder ROTTMNT brothers x autistic reader? (separate of course)

my good [insert gender neutral term used to reference a person here], if you put something into my inbox I am going to write it

anyway uh little disclaimer: I may be self diagnosed with autism but by no means does that make me an expert, people's experiences are different and I don't mean to stick stereotypes on people

anyways hope you enjoy! ❤️

Leo:

-Leo thinks you’re adorable

-All of your little stims and fidget toys

-But a lot of his romantic gestures seem to be off the table

-He loves looking into your eyes, but he doesn’t like it when you don’t look into his

-He’ll turn your face towards his so he can see your beautiful eyes

-Sometimes you’ll tear up because you’re uncomfortable from the long period of eye contact

-But he only thinks it makes your eyes more beautiful

-He is also very fond of picking you up out of nowhere

-While he knows you don’t like being scared like that, it’s the only way other than holding hands that he can be close to you

-(But sometimes he’ll break into your home at night and cuddle with you while you sleep)

Raph:

-Raph loves taking care of youHe knows very well that you need some extra help sometimes

-And he’s very glad that he’s the one that can give it to you

-His favorite thing is giving you bear hugs to help with your sensory issues

-In that moment, you’re safe in his arms, and he’s the only one you’ll ever need

-But he doesn’t like when other people help you

-He’s supposed to be your one and only savior

-The only one who knows what you need, that can help you

-One time you asked if you could go see a therapist to help with your anxiety, and he got very upset

-“Why would you need to go see anyone else? I’m all you’ll ever need, babe…no one else knows you like I do. They can’t help you like I can. You don’t need to see a therapist.”

-He said in such a loving tone that you were even convinced he was right…

Mikey:

-Mikey puts you first

-He knows everything that you need

-He is so eager to help you, in fact, that sometimes he goes a little overboard

-Every day he gives you a new fidget toy to use

-And he gets very sad if you reject his offer

-(Even though you already have hundreds)

-He tends to treat you like a kid

-Asking how your day’s been, if you need anything

-He cooks you food, drives you everywhere, puts you to bed

-It gets a little annoying sometimes, being treated like that

-But if anyone were to even lay a finger on you, he goes full defensive mode

-God forbid anyone insult you

Donnie:

-As someone who also has autism, he understands your needs

-But he still gets a little frustrated sometimes

-He wants to love you, but you make it a little hard sometimes

-His unexpected hugs from behind often make you jump, which he doesn’t like

-Your need to be alone more often than usual makes him mad

-Whenever you’re stressed or anxious, he tries to calm you down with hugs and kisses, which only makes it worse

-He has fidget toys on hand for you, because he knows those will always calm you down

-He gets mad whenever he has to use them, though

-He doesn’t like that something else has your attention more

-He also doesn’t understand why his love won't calm you down

-Your love and affection will calm him down, so why doesn’t it work the other way around?

-And sure, you may have autism, but so does he

-So why can he be the only “normal” one in the relationship?

#lykaios writes #rottmnt #rise of the tmnt #tmnt 2018 #teenage mutant ninja turtles #donnie rottmnt #rottmnt mikey #rottmnt leo #raph rottmnt #yandere raph #yandere leonardo #yandere mikey #yandere donatello #rottmnt x y/n #rottmnt x reader

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boots-with-the-fur-club · 2 months

Note

28 and 29

I combined the two, hope you don’t mind! Also, um, I went a little far with this. Make sure to check the tags.

@daboyau

Leo thrashes around violently against the restraints keeping him to the table. The Kraang who brought him there had taken out his portaling ability the first chance they got. It feels like years since then. Maybe it has been. The Kraang aren’t exactly generous when it comes to their prisoners.

Especially not one they’re trying to break.

He stops moving as much when a certain former warring warrior scientist walks in. He was taken at the same time Leo was.

That doesn’t mean he’s also a prisoner though.

“I-I want to be mad at you, but you’re like this and Mikey isn’t….you turned into such a freaking softy. Sacrificing yourself for the greatest mystic warrior ever? He’s not even a kid anymore.” Leo scoffs.

Draxum’s half Kraang covered face doesn’t change expressions. It was worth a try. It’s not like this could get any worse. It is torture by the world’s evilest creatures after all.

He lifts up a syringe filled with a green substance.

“What….going to double mutate me? It’ll do exactly what you’re trying to avoid.” Leo insists.

The reason Leo isn’t part of the grossest shade of pink ever hive mind right now is because they want someone to infiltrate the resistance undetected. That means he can’t look like Draxum does right now.

It also means they have to get him under their control another way.

He had been kept in a cell for a long time before this. Every day, Draxum would come in and use something new on him to make sure he never got used to the torture.

Leo’s healing factor meant that it could go on for a long time. Wounds closing just to be torn open again. A fresh canvas to splash with blood.

Just recently, he’s been making a lot more serious escape attempts. He almost made it the other day. The Kraang were really pissed about it.

This is probably punishment.

Draxum injects the liquid into his vein and immediately it feels like his insides are on fire. He bites his lip so hard it bleeds. He’s shocked when it hasn’t begun to heal already.

There’s….no way he just….?

The pain throbs through his whole body and he can suddenly feel it where he hadn’t before. A broken ankle that he was able to walk on now is absolutely killing him.

His wrists burn and bleed from how much he just tried to free himself.

He really did it.

Draxum took his healing factor.

A saw appears in his line of vision that is pressed against his arm.

His cool persona starts breaking as he feels the words to beg for this not to happen on the tip of his tongue. They’re only barely held back by the fact he knows it’ll only encourage The Kraang.

Draxum begins sawing.

Slowly.

Leo feels the scream come deep from his core. The pain is completely unbearable. There’s absolutely no drug to get him through it.

He hears liquid dripping to the floor. It’s easy to imagine both the tears pouring from his face and wound mixing on the ground.

Leo starts passing out from the pain. He feels something else inject to his other arm and his brain buzzes back to life.

Adrenaline.

He’s keeping him from going to into shock. From passing out. From escaping the worst pain of his life.

It keeps going on and on. It’s so slow. He can feel when his nerves die and shut off. It’s only some.

He’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone he’s hitting bone-

Ah.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE MAKE IT STOP!

RAPH!! DONNIE!! MIKEY!!

DAD! GRAM-GRAM!

ANYBODY! PLEASE!

A wall blows open.

Finally, finally, something other than the sound of his flesh and tendons being torn through.

The saw stops as he’s vaguely aware of Draxum getting tossed so hard he’s not sure he’s ever going to get up again.

There’s screaming.

A lot of screaming.

Oh, he recognizes those voices.

He’s barely able to turn his head to look his family there.

His brothers and-

Ha.

Who’s letting Casey J.R. see this?

Gross!

Leo starts laughing.

His brothers all start trying to help him. Casey J.R. stays back, eyes wide and full of absolute fear.

Leo laughs more.

How awful.

#tw amputation #tw torture #tw saw #tw blood #tw needles #tw experimentation #tw surgery #tw angst #angst no comfort #rise fanfiction #rottmnt fanfiction #future leo #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt #2018 tmnt #rottmnt casey jr #tw body horror

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itzzaira · 2 months

Text

WHOOOO YESTERDAY'S ART IS DIGITAL NOW!

Poor Leo, he's really going through it isn't he? First he breaks down in front of Raph, Donnie won't talk to him, and then he starts crying in front of a comatose Mikey... at least our boy finally woke up.

Two down... one more ninpo to reconnect with.

This is based on chapter 19 of The Wrong Side of the Portal - a 2012/2018 crossover fic, where after the movie, instead of getting home... Leo gets trapped in the 2012 dimension instead.

With no way to contact his brothers and his ninpo acting odd... either he, or one of the others, must find him a way home... before someone else does.

~~~~~

[Scene this is based off]

Confused, Leo went to look at Mikey's ninpo again, letting out a yelp when he saw a pair of red eyes looking at him, exhausted, but shining with life.

He blinked.

Mikey stared back.

"...Mikey?"

"...Hm." he groaned, shifting just a little to get more comfortable, unable to do so properly because Leo was sitting on his legs. "...Wha...? Leo...?" He winced. His voice sounded rough.

The older one blinked again.

...Mikey.

Woke up.

Just like that.

His baby brother. Who had been in a coma two seconds earlier, had woken up.

But why did-

Mikey had always been a family person.

"..." Leo looked down at his ninpo. Then at Mikey's.

...Oh.

Ooooh.

Leo snorted- because even if he still couldn't feel Donnie, he could finally feel the youngest- his ninpo expressing the concern, care, and love he had trouble showing as the box turtle was trying to figure out what the heck was going on, squinting his eyes and smacking his lips. Then he looked down at their hands. At their pinkies.

The four, beautiful dots in front of him. And smiled with relief. He made no effort to remove his hand as he slumped back.

Seems like Leo's theory had been right after all. He giggled, then burst out laughing.

But then that smile fell. The laughs turned into shuddering breaths as he covered his mouth. Not those heartbreaking sobs from before, but silent tears of relief.

Leave it to Mikey to wake up because of fucking family magic or whatever the heck their ninpo was.

Stuttery hands reached for his own- Leo noted the scars had responded to his ninpo as well- allowing Mikey to see the absolute mess he was in. "Why you cryin'...?" He slurred, attempting to brush the tears away. Before he gave up. And instead let his hand rest on Leo's. "Whas... what's wrong?"

"You-" he laughed wetly because the fact the nunchuck-wielder was worried about Leo after waking up from a fucking coma was so Mikey-like the slider could weep again. Though maybe he shouldn't, he was acting like a crybaby.

Well. This time he had a good excuse.

"Nothing, Michael." He murmured with a smile, putting Mikey's hands down and cupping his face lovingly, then reaching down to gently bump their heads together with a soft churr. "Nothing at all."

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goosewriting · 2 years

Text

You, me and the apocalypse (rottmnt Leo x reader)

summary: after Cassandra’s death, you’re left with a kid to take care of

relationship: future Rise!Leo x GN reader (established)

warnings: mentions of character deaths (yes plural), lots of angst, mainly just internal monologue really, comfort at the end

word count: 2320

A/N: i have no idea what made me write this lmao but i guess i wanted to explore a bit how Leo and reader would feel about taking in Casey. maybe this has a potential for a part 2? 🤔

(english is not my first language. constructive criticism and grammar corrections are very appreciated!)

– – –

You stood in front of Cassandra’s improvised gravestone that you had just placed. It was more of a decently shaped piece of debris, really. Donnie had helped you carve her name and the date on it, followed by a “Mother, Friend and Badass Fighter”.

With the back of your sleeve you wiped away the sweat on your forehead which had accumulated from digging. Turning around your hand to get a dry part of the sleeve, you continued to wipe your face, but this time it was the tears running down your cheeks.

Cassandra had joined you, April and the turtles a couple of years after the invasion started. Up to that point you had no idea she even was alive. And to everyone’s surprise, she wasn’t alone: she had a kid. Casey Jr must have been around 7 years old when you met him. At first he was very shy but soon he opened up and you were intrigued by this little human, so full of life. It was such a contrast to everything around you.

There weren’t many kids around in the apocalypse, but every time you looked at Casey Jr you were reminded that there was still a reason worth fighting for; the next generation. You refused to believe that this was the end of humankind and Earth as you knew it.

In fact, it was only after Cassandra and her kid joined the rebellion that Leo started to use the phrase “Hope: a ninja’s greatest weapon”. So you knew he felt the same way about wanting to fight for those who will come after you. You talked about it with him quite often actually, making plans to take over Krang posts and stations until late into the night. And now one of your best fighters was gone, just like that.

You were quietly sniffling to yourself, processing everything, when you felt a gentle yet firm grip on your shoulder. Knowing who it was, you let the shovel you used on the makeshift gravestone fall from your hands to the ground and turned around to embrace Leo in a much needed hug. He placed his chin on your head and softly stroked your back in soothing circles.

He had gotten quite tall and big, so you couldn’t hug all the way around his shell like you used to. But being in his arms like this made you feel even safer than before, since your form was smaller than it used to in comparison. Oh how you missed the good old carefree days, when your worries consisted mostly of New York housing prices and finding good pizza for your turtle friends, and you didn’t have to think about surviving an alien invasion.

Somewhere in the far depths of your brain you heard the tiniest voice whisper to you. Lately, especially when things got very bad, it seemed to be a returning thought. It’s Leo’s fault, it taunted you. If he hadn’t lost the key to the Foot that day and listened to Raph, this wouldn't have happened.

You shook your head and smothered your cheek even tighter against Leo’s plastron. In your mind you imagined yourself catching this tiny thought, scurrying around like a bug, stuffing it into a jar you closed very tightly, and buried into the darkest, most far-off cabinet, drawer, or pile of repressed feelings you could find, hoping it would asphyxiate and perish once and for all. You hated yourself for thinking that he was to blame somehow, and you hated even more that you couldn’t get rid of that thought.

The first time it had crossed your mind was when you lost Raph. Every time you remembered how the red turtle would say he was the biggest brother so he had to protect his family, and how that was the very reason he died, your chest tightened with a stinging pain.

And now Cassandra was gone too, also protecting that which she loved most; her child. And in the process leaving him behind.

You pulled back slightly to look at Leo. He gave you a soft smile, as if to say “It will be okay, we’ll figure it out”. But in his eyes you could also see the pain. At least he seemed to be handling this loss far better than last time.

Raph’s death had shaken all of you to the core, but Leo did not know not know how to handle the grief. Thinking all of the responsibility (keeping you guys alive, leading the rebellion, defeating the Krang) now fell onto him, he never really gave himself the time to mourn his brother.

And then Splinter was gone. Leo started to shut out everyone. He didn’t just have a shell on his back, but also around his heart. Starting to leave you out of it as well in the process. Your turtle was becoming but a husk of whom he once was. It broke you seeing him like that, so you decided to finally confront him about it. You had to basically tie him down for that because he was clearly dealing with everything by not dealing with it. By then it had already been several months since Splinter’s passing. When he finally allowed himself to feel and process what had happened, you stayed awake with him the whole night, held him, as he sobbed and screamed into your lap.

April, Donnie and Mikey went through their grief in their own way, and you tried to support them to the best of your abilities. You smiled bitterly to yourself at the irony of how sometimes it is horrible things that knit people closer together.

And now here you stood, still in Leo’s arms, your gaze shifting past him to the boy standing a couple steps behind the turtle, hugging the skull-like mask that his mother used to wear. He was only 9 years old, born into a world of chaos and despair. His biological father wasn’t in the picture; in fact you didn’t even know who it was, but it didn’t matter. You had become a bit of an aunty/uncle figure to him, while Leo was more of a father figure really. Casey Jr (or rather just Casey, you internally corrected yourself, as he’s the only Casey left), had always called him “Master Leonardo”. If younger Leo had heard that, his ego surely would have been through the roof. But the title was now humbling, reminding Leo of the responsibility he had for those that looked up to him. Not that he owed them anything. This wasn’t about boasting or showing off anymore; it was about being the best version of himself he could be, to live without “what if”s and “if only”s.

You let go of Leo and approached Casey, who was trying and failing to hold back his sobs. You crouched down, with one knee on the ground, to be on his eye-level. You stroked over his cheek, wiping away some tears with your thumb.

“It’s okay to cry” you spoke softly, trying not to cry yourself. “It’s okay to be sad, and scared. But remember you’re not alone, Casey. We’re here and we will take care of you, okay?” Your voice almost cracked at the end. You were trying really hard to choose the right words. How do you comfort a child in this situation?

Leo approached you both and stood next to you, also crouching down, and placed his hand carefully on Casey’s other shoulder. The boy clutched the mask even tighter, and started wailing. His sobs and cries filled the evening air, while Leo and you hugged him between you both, hoping to get the broken pieces back into place for this kid, who had a huge personality like his mother, and was always bright and optimistic. And in that very moment, even though he wasn’t your own son, you hoped with all your heart that you could be there with him and for him, and see him grow into the man you knew Leo would guide him to be.

— — —

That night Casey slept with Mikey. He was exhausted, so he fell asleep pretty quickly. Everyone said their good night’s and you headed to yours and Leo’s shared tent. He was sat outside of it, looking at the red mask tied to the handle of his sword. As you approached, Leo slid the weapon back into its sheath and placed it aside.

You helped him take off his prosthetic arm and also gently placed it to the side. With his other hand he massaged the nub and sighed; his arm was cut off just above where the elbow would be.

“How are you feeling?” you asked, sitting down next to him. Your eyes went over the view before you. In the distance you could see the Technodrome, with lights and explosions going off around it. The sound was faint since you were pretty far away, but ever-present. You leaned your head onto his good shoulder, to which he wrapped his arm around you.

“I’m holding up. What about you?” he replied, looking down at your tired eyes. Turning your face to look up at him, you took in a deep breath, held it for a moment, and let it out in a sigh.

“Worried, mostly. For the kid.”

“He’ll be fine. He’ll learn, just like we did.”

At that you silently scoffed. He gave you a questioning look.

“It shouldn't be like this”, you started. “It never should have been like this. Kids should be in school, pranking their siblings, having snowball fights and throwing tantrums because they don’t want to nap. They shouldn't be seeing all of… this” you gestured to the alien battleship in the distance. “around them, learning that this is ‘normal’.”

“You know I agree with you.” Leo said, removing his hand from around you to bring it up to your face. He gently stroked your cheek with his knuckles, over your temple and ended up fully cupping your cheek. You saw his other arm slightly shift forward; you weren’t sure if it was for balance or because he meant to hold your face with both hands, if he still had them. “But there’s nothing we can do now. You know I wish we had a second chance at all of this. Of course there’s things I wish I had done differently, but stressing over it won’t bring me or you anywhere. The only thing we can do is look into the future and try to make the best of it.”

You placed your hand over his at your cheek, and leaned into his touch. “I know…” you muttered.

“Besides” he added and guided you to sit on his lap, straddling him. “There actually is something good in all of this. One of my biggest wishes did come true, even though not exactly how I pictured it.”

You placed your arms around his shoulders and looked curiously at him. “And what is that?” you asked, to which he smirked.

“I wanted to have you by my side, and form a family of our own. I was thinking more along the lines of a dog, maybe a parrot, or a couple of cats, but I think a ‘sort of adopted’ kid also counts, don’t you think?” Leo looked at you full of love, snaking his arm around your waist.

His comment made you blush and a swarm of butterflies made itself noticeable at the pit of your stomach. You loved that even though you had been together for so long and the world around was looking pretty bleak, he could still make you feel like you had a teenage crush on him. You were still head over heels for him, sure, but sometimes you missed the childish banter, comments and lame one-liners he used to be the champion of. He still did all of that, just not as much, and not in front of the others. And it was rare to get a peaceful one-on-one moment in the apocalypse.

“You were considering getting a parrot?” you questioned, tilting your head.

“That’s the part you decided to focus on?” he laughed, but he could tell you were teasing him; your smile and rosy cheeks betrayed you.

You cupped his face. “The apocalypse would suck so much without you” you told him and leaned forward to kiss him. He reciprocated and held you tighter to his chest. You tilted your head lightly to deepen the kiss and tangled your hands into the blue strands of his bandana. The need for air made you break the kiss and you rested your forehead against his, both of you lightly panting.

A cold breeze blew over you, making you shiver. You both took this as a sign to get to bed. You climbed off of Leo and made your way into the tent. You took off your jacket and jeans, folded and carefully placed them to the side. Then you nestled into Leo’s chest, both lying facing each other. You used his injured arm as a pillow, and he pulled you close with his other arm. Under the covers you tangled your legs together.

You yawned and placed a kiss on his neck. In turn he kissed the top of your head, mumbling a “G’night” into your hair.

Your mind replayed several moments of the day, trying to drift off into sleep. You decided to skip the not so nice ones, ending up in the conversation you had earlier with Leo. Just as you were softly rolling into dreamland, his words echoed through your head: “I wish we had a second chance at this”. Maybe you could find a way. But that was a problem to solve tomorrow. Right now you simply enjoyed being in Leo’s arms, listening to his steady breathing. That night you dreamt of New York pizza, Cassandra, and a parrot.

#goose feathers #rottmnt #save rottmnt #rottmnt leo x reader #tmnt leo x reader #tmnt 2018 #rottmnt x reader

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leomeoi · 11 months

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Happier

The title is from the song "Happier" by Marshmello Bastille. The lyrics "I want you to be happier. Know that means I'll have to leave." spoke to me. Please read the wonderful @tapakah0's comic and watch the amazing animatic they did that this work is inspired from. (Please forgive any out of characterness or grammar mistakes, I had no Beta Reader and wrote this in one sitting.) Thank you so much to Tapakah for drawing this amazing comic and answering my questions, as well as allowing me to write a fic for their work.

Oh, obligatory warning. This is angst. There is major character death, violence, and sadness. It ends unhappy (for now.) Proceed with caution and make informed decisions!

Click here for a link to the Archive Of Our Own version!

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Today's a big day.

Arguably, every day that they go out to fight the Krang that have infiltrated every nook, cranny, and crevice of their lives all those years ago is a big day. Raphael can't help but feel the bone-crushing load of responsibility that weighs down on his shoulders as he watches the hubbub of activity from the head. As he scans the faces of each person—human and mutant alike—with his one good eye, Raph feels as if his shell might just crack. He's not naive. There's nothing normal about this. He knows that they won't be able to save everyone, there'll be casualties. Their days are numbered, and the world just isn't fair in that way. The Krang aren't merciful. It could be anyone that they lose, there's no off-limits, and there's no way of predicting what shade of grief they'll experience today. As more and more days go by, Raphael can't shake the feeling that every victory they have is just a pyrrhic one. Even still, they fight. Everyone currently in the shelter of this hangar does. They all hope for a better future, a chance to reclaim all that they lost and there's not a single person who isn't willing to sacrifice it all. There's nothing more important than to ensure the success of this battle they're about to fight in the world war they've been waging against the invading advanced alien species.

He doesn't want to think about it. He doesn't want to think about all the people that they've lost. It sends ripples of agony tearing through his chest, a physical ache that he can feel permeate even his plastron. It's a horrid fact that death is actually the most merciful thing the Krang can gift them with. They've lost countless others to infection, the result of that blasted plague yielding pink, fleshy atrocities, the host twisted and manipulated into a mere shell of their former self. They cannot be qualified as a person by then, bestial creatures hellbent on destruction and controlled by the very violators that infected them to begin with. It's a fate worse than death, the loss of will and self; they move only to the will impressed upon them. Raph's arms cross even tighter across his broad chest, his teeth grinding. The cold metal of his right arm reminds him that he's gotten off lucky. His fingers dig into his elbows as he stands, a grim and foreboding figure against the thoughts that plague his mind. He knows that he's gotten lost under the pressure of his thoughts when he stirs only at a warm touch against his forearm.

"Raph? You okay, big man?"

The sound of Leo's voice snaps him out of it further. His tone is bright, but Raph can hear the undertow of concern. Raph tears his gaze away from the milling crowd and looks down, meeting his brother's gaze. Even though it's been years, Raphael still can't help the flare of pride every time he sees Leo and how much he's changed over the years. It seems like yesterday that Raphael had to scold, nag, and practically plead with his younger sibling to get him to take things seriously. He knows that being the leader was a pressure that Leonardo never wanted, but once he's received it, he'd learned the gravity of the role. Sometimes, Raph thinks Leonardo has outgrown him, just the way that Raphael thought he would. A lesser turtle would have broken under the pressure, but Leonardo is as strong as he is stubborn. He stands against the test of time and loss, brave and unrelenting. He now leads with a certainty that has saved them on numerous occasions, and Raphael truly couldn't be prouder of how much he's grown into the role given to him.

Leonardo must see the way Raph's eyes soften because the sharp grin on his face loses its charming edge, too. Raph's chest feels tight as if his heart would burst out from the confines of his plastron. It's an entirely different reason than just a few seconds before when the grim reality was moments from overwhelming him.

He really is so proud.

"Yeah, Raph's okay. Just thinking." Raphael flashes his snaggletooth in a wide smile, and Leo mirrors it.

Normally, the conversation would end there. Raph wasn't the best at expressing his feelings, and Leonardo was even less so. He doesn't have the same connection to Leo that Donatello seems to have—they are self-proclaimed twins after all. They communicate almost solely on looks and gestures as if that's enough to convey exactly what it is they want to say. They leave nearly everything unsaid, but that's simply not something Raph can do. It's easy to communicate with Mikey; he's the best of them all. Still, there's so much that he wants to say to Leo, but it's almost time to leave. Raph can tell by the way things are quieting, the chaos of getting prepared sinking into the hum of calm and determined poise. Even with it all, Raphael is gripped with the unshakable feeling that he simply needs to get out. He doesn't know what it is, but it's an undeniable urge.

Leonardo's about to turn away. Despite the eternity that Raph feels like he just went through in his struggle to find the right words, mere seconds have passed. Raph decides that he doesn't need pretty words like Donnie, or the innate ability Mikey has to say exactly what a turtle needs to hear. Leo will understand. He knows Raph. He knows that they're connected and understand each other in a way that only those who have and are responsible for the lives of many can.

"Leo," he starts, and Raph almost winces at how serious he sounds. Leo blinks at the sudden change in tone, but he doesn't falter. His easy grin changes almost immediately, and the fact he no longer tries to deflect serious conversation with humor when it comes to Raphael brings yet another wave of pride. Leo stands before him, waiting. He's listening.

Raphael nods to himself, lifting a hand to place on Leonardo's shoulder. He squeezes and shakes Leo lightly, a reassuring gesture. His snaggletooth makes even more of an appearance as he smiles wide. "Raph is so proud. You've kicked ass and grown. You don't need lil ol' me anymore. I could not be more proud."

Surprise flits through Leo's eyes before it's replaced by something else. His gaze is piercing, eyes dark and almost unreadable. Almost. In another time, Raph wouldn't have ever thought that he'd know Leo so well. The feeling is potent, and Raph can feel it, too. It charges him with strength, and a new lightness finds his spirit. The iron trust that Leo has in him shines in his eyes, and Raphael had almost felt too small to withstand the weight of it once. Now, it gives Raph the strength he needs to continue on.

It seems to have been the right time to say what he was thinking.

Leonardo's shoulders square, and he seems to grow even taller before Raphael's very eyes. "Don't kid yourself, Raph," Leo chuckles. He slaps at Raph's arm lightly with a pat. "I'll always need my big brother." They both laugh at that, the serious mood broken up as their chortles sound in the room. With that, Leonardo turns away, moving his attention to something else that they need to be as prepared as they ever will be. Raph doesn't really concern himself with that anymore unless Leo needs him to. Bolstered by warmth, Raph knows that he needs to make his own rounds. He walks through the crowd, and people part way for him to accommodate his bulk. He stops and talks to a few, bumps elbows with April, and high-fives Cassandra. Somewhere along the line, Cass and Raph had grown closer. Undoubtedly, it was because of a certain young individual they spent any spare moment they had with.

Somewhere in the middle of that, Raph finds who he's looking for. "Donnie," he calls, and his brother whirls towards him. Donnie's battle shell remains engaged in what seems to be furious typing, his purple holographs buzzing with ninpo. A fond smile lights up Raph's face—even in the midst of preparing for a big battle, Donatello is always moving. His mind is always working, and Raphael wonders if it's because it's so loud that Donnie rarely ever sleeps.

"Raph," Donnie greets, the lenses of his red and blue goggles whirring as they adjust to parse Raph. Then, Donnie groans. "What did Nardo break now? I swear, I told him I'm gonna kick his shell if he breaks one more damn thing, so he decides to send you to break the news? I'm gonna find him-" He starts to grouse, and Raphael is sent into a frenzy trying to placate him.

"No, no! Leo didn't break nothin'. Just... Raph just wanted to talk to you. Before everything." Raphael shrugs, his hands outstretched and spread to show his surrender. Donatello squints and it's obvious that he's suspicious. His drawn-on eyebrows arch, and Raphael can't help but laugh again. There is no doubt that Donatello is the most expressive one of them all. His eyebrows only add to his charm, and over the years, he's grown into his skin even more. Raph thinks that Donatello is also the one to hide his emotions the most, choosing pragmatism and logic over the pursuit of emotions at all times. It's also why Raph thinks that Donatello's mask—the persona that he adopts—rivals Leo's.

In truth, Donatello is generous. He's a genius, a maniacal scientist, and Raph knows that his mind works in ways unmatched. He knows that it's because Donnie is Donnie that they've been able to maintain a semblance of a life. Raph knows that Donnie works himself to the bone for them, and fixes every problem that crops up that others don't even know where to begin. The thing with Donnie is that he's so, so generous, with a heart that's about as soft as his shell. Raph knows that he doesn't want anyone to know. Donnie gives them his all every day, every minute, and every second. It's enough for Raph to worry that one day, Donnie will give, give, and give until there's nothing left. Raphael has always silenced that voice, knowing that it comes from a selfish part of Raph that wants his brothers cared for, apocalypse be damned. Now, though. Raph thinks he can convey what he wants to say to Donnie at least once in a way that he can't be misunderstood.

Taking Donnie's suspicious look in stride, Raphael reaches up to rap his knuckles against his metal prosthetic. It makes a sharp sound each time he does, and Raph grins in spite of it all. "I know I've said this already, but Dontron... Thanks again. I know that this-" Raph gestures to all around him, and then again to his arm, "-couldn't have happened without you." Donnie seems to have been caught off guard by the sincere way Raphael is saying what he wants to say. Still, he recovers fast.

"Why, of course. I'm glad you realize that you need my brilliant mind and recognize that this is all in courtesy of the great Donatello, a.k.a. moi." Donatello's eyes are half-moons, his goggles retreating to the top of his head. His grin is smug, but Raph can see the genuine curls of delight that cause the corners of the said grin to twitch into an almost smile. Donatello's arms outstretch to gesture to the entire facility, and the simple movement makes him look bigger than life. It's grandiose, enthusiastic, and just as bombastic as Raph would have expected Donnie to respond with. Raphael doesn't bother stopping the laugh that escapes him, and his deep laughter seems to infect Donnie, too. He laughs with Raph, a small rumble mixed with the beginnings of a chirp. After the laughter dies down, Donnie gives Raph another grin. "Okay, now that you have me sufficiently buttered up, what did you break?" Donnie asks, his voice teasing. Raphael recognizes it for the jest that it is, and he snorts again.

"I keep tellin' you, nothing's broke!" Raphael's hands lift and they settle on Donatello's shoulders. He can't be too serious. Donnie will be too busy trying to make light of the words leaving Raph's mouth in his mind to truly understand what he's trying to say. Raph smiles. "Just tryna say thank you, Dontron. You're right, we need your brilliant mind, but that's not all we need," he gently reminds the younger turtle. "You're our Donnie, too. Our brother. Raph just wants to make sure that you take care of yourself, too. Less coffee, more sleep." He shrugs, his voice light. For a moment or two, Donnie says nothing. His eyes are wide, fixated on Raph's. It's enough to make Raph nervous and wonder if he's gone too far, but his fears are dispelled when Donnie's shoulders slump slightly under his hands.

"When did you turn all Dr. Feelings? Isn't that Michelangelo's job?" Donnie jokes and makes a face, but his voice shakes just enough to convey that he understands what Raph is trying to say. Raphael chooses to act mock-offended, going along with the bit.

"Hey! Are you saying Raph can't say that he loves his brothers?" He huffs, and Donnie rolls his eyes. The heavier moment dispels and Donnie's attention is suddenly needed elsewhere, judging by the beeping that he can hear. Raph lets his hands fall from Donatello's shoulders.

"Duty calls. No rest for the wicked." Donnie sighs, somehow dramatic and sincere at the same time. His eyes are closed as he says this, but he peeks out at Raph. That's enough for Raph to spot the gentle glint in his brother's eye. "But..." he intones, combining the sound with another sigh. "I'll try." Raph grins.

"All I ask." He nods, and Donnie hums. He's reorienting himself, Raph has heard that noncommital hum too many times to not know. "I'll see you later, Dontron," Raphael says before he loses Donnie in a string of mutters, and Donnie gives him a wave as his goggles return to his face, already focusing on what had pulled him away.

Raphael keeps walking. He dodges children, people, and mutants. It's not easy with his build, and he sticks out like a sore thumb from size alone. Still, it's not enough to deter him from finding Mikey. Mikey's as easy to spot as it is to spot Raph in a crowd. His powerful ninpo rolls off him in waves, mysticality crackling under his fingertips. It surges through his entire body, and it's almost impossible to miss. He's often haloed in a golden light, something that's as warm as his spirit. Over the years, Mikey has only grown more powerful, but with his abilities, so does his wisdom. Mikey is no longer just the goofy turtle he'd been before; he is wise beyond his years, capable, and strong. He's the inspiration within the Resistance, the ever-burning beacon of hope. Raph has leaned on him for support more times than he can count, and Mikey has more than once single-handedly born the grief of hundreds after a bad battle. Many turn to him for guidance now.

Raph finds him in the exact position that he thought he would.

"Mikey," he says, trying to hold back laughter. At Raph's voice, Mikey looks up, expression bright.

"Raph! Hiya, bud. Apparently, my hair's getting too long!" He says, voice full of cheer and contentment. He's surrounded by an ethereal glow, and floating. His legs are crossed, and there is a gaggle of giggling children running around him. They dip below him from where he's floating, dodging each other while they play tag. The innocence of the view seems to heal all the old wounds and the scars littering Raph's heart momentarily. There's another taller child with her fingers in Mikey's hair, and upon closer inspection, she's braiding it. Mikey already has multiple little braids here and there in his hair, and it's a sight that makes Raph's caught laughter burst free.

"Really? Raph thinks it's fine." He tilts his head as he inspects Mikey, and he's sure his expression mirrors Mikey's. Raph edges closer before he sits down with a mighty groan, and maybe a bit of a heavier thud than he'd wanted. The children crow as the ground shakes a little when Raph sits down, and he's swarmed. They crawl all over his legs, chattering excitedly, and Raph sits and listens. He and Michelangelo both do. They bask in the simple joy that the children exude. They ask him all kinds of questions, and Raph answers the best he can. They tell him nonsensical stories, about everything Mikey has been telling them, stories of times before the Krang. It's a bittersweet experience, knowing that there's a chance that these children will never experience what they had. Still, the tenacity and hope these children hold to someday seeing all that they've been told of is infectious. It reminds him of something their dad has always told them.

Hope is a ninja's greatest weapon.

Eventually, the children go off to Mikey's gentle shooing, as if he knows that Raphael has something important to say. The bond they share is close to the silent bond that Leonardo and Donatello share. In the past, Raphael and Michelangelo had clashed on more than one occasion. Raph knows he could be overprotective. He had been, back then, and Raph is old enough to admit that. Michelangelo had been the youngest, and even though he still is, Raphael trusts that he can protect himself now. That he can protect all of them. More than anything, Raph trusts Mikey with the Resistance. He trusts Mikey with their family. It's an all-encompassing trust that's hard to explain, even if he tries. After the Krang, after they'd been forced to grow, their relationship had changed forever. It was for the better. They'd grown closer, and the need for verbal communication has nearly faded from existence. Michelangelo can read Raph like a book. Even now, he waits for Raphael to collect his thoughts because he knows that his older brother has something to say. Raphael is grateful for it, just like all the times before.

After another few moments of silence, Raph wordlessly leans. He leans enough that their shoulders touch. He can feel the warmth spilling from Michelangelo, and it's comforting in ways that he can't describe. Mikey hums, but he doesn't say anything. His short braids are slowly coming loose, and they both stare from the sidelines as their people gather the rowdy children, scooping them up for hugs and kisses. Raph swallows. The heavy feeling from earlier returns. How many of these children would end up orphaned after this fight? He ignores a palpable thought about Casey Jr. that flits through his mind as fast as lightning. He doesn't want to think about that now. Raphael knows that Mikey can sense the dread that is approaching, the muted fear and grief that is already threatening his horizon. In front of Mikey, Raphael doesn't really find the need to appear as strong as he feels he needs to be around everyone else. He knows Mikey understands.

"Mikey," he starts, his voice suddenly hoarse around the lump in his throat. Michelangelo doesn't respond, just nudges his shoulder into Raph's harder. Raph takes a deep breath. He needs to say what he actually has on his mind, or he might burst. He's mentioned it to Donatello before, but Donnie hadn't let him finish. He'd dismissed the notion, he'd been angry with Raph for thinking such things. Raph hadn't broached the subject again. Now, he thinks it's a good time to. "If Raph doesn't make it back, please take care of our family." He smiles, feeling a hot pressure starting to build behind his eye. He knows that it's tears. Michelangelo still doesn't say anything. Raph presses on. "If- Donnie said somethin’ before about the mission goin' wrong and said that it's likely going to be Leo who's out for the count. I dunno if Donnie's goin' to be right, but it's Donnie. He probably is." He laughs, trying to free some of the building pressure in his throat. He swallows, again. Harder this time.

"Don't let Leo blame himself. Or Donnie. An'... An' I don't want you blaming yourself either. Okay?" Raph finally turns his head to look at Mikey and finds that Mikey is staring at him. Michelangelo is looking at him with a pained expression on his face. He doesn't bother hiding it. He knows what Raph is talking about, and even if he doesn't interrupt, Raph knows that Mikey is struggling already with the thought of something going awry. "I know it's goin' to be hard. But... But you're the strongest of us all, Mikey. In here." Raph reaches over, placing a hand over his brother's plastron. "They're gonna need you. It's not fair, I know. But they are. Just... Just remember me for me, an' the good things. Keep goin'. Keep them goin'." Raph's smile is trembling, he knows. He sees Michelangelo struggle for a moment or two before he feels and sees Mikey let out a harsh, near-guttural breath. His eyes are glassy as if he's holding back tears. Then, Mikey nods.

"Okay," Mikey whispers. Raphael keeps the smile on his face and nods back. Then, Raphael pulls Mikey into a hug. He hugs him tight, and he can't help but notice just how small Mikey is compared to him. He feels even more sorrowful, knowing that Mikey is still the youngest but Raph is asking so much from him. He's come to realize and know that Mikey is incredibly powerful, and because of that, sometimes he forgets just how young Mikey still is. Raph tightens his grip. That seems to be enough for Michelangelo. He hugs back, and they stay that way for a few heartrending moments. Raphael eventually pulls back, and if he did so with a sniffle, no one is going to call him out on it.

Raph gives Mikey's shoulders one last squeeze before he releases his brother. He swivels his head back to their people, and Raph knows that they're ready. He finds his way back onto his feet and pushes through the crowd again, heading towards the front lines. He sees Leo. He's waiting for Raph. Raphael takes a deep breath to collect himself before he lets his focus overcome the dread that he'd experienced mere moments ago. He finds his rightful place next to Leo.

"You ready?" Leo's voice is quiet, a muted question. There's the slightest hint of uncertainty, and Raph knows more than anyone what Leo's feeling.

"Ready." Raphael agrees, and his response seems to bolster Leo. He grins. Raph returns it with a smirk, straightening as he turns to face the crowd. "We're moving out soon! Everyone get ready!" He rumbles, voice filling the hangar. There are a few cheers, and everyone scrambles to get last-minute preparations underway. Among them is Cass. He watches as she stoops to hug her son. Raph watches, his heart in his throat as Casey giggles in his mom's arms, his little head poking up past Cass' shoulder. He squeals when he's lifted up by his mom, and Raph feels like he shouldn't intrude on the moment. He turns away despite his aching heart. He's about to walk away when he hears Casey's unmistakable voice. It's not Casey's voice that stops him dead in his tracks. It's what he says.

"Pap?"

For what feels like an eternity, Raph's brain blanks. He stands still as his brothers all laugh, equal parts disbelief and amusement. All Raph can do is flounder. Flashes of Splinter enter his mind, memories of their father dancing before his very eyes. Suddenly, it all makes sense. It's like his world realigns. What his brothers say becomes mush, and he can't seem to process anything but the single word he'd heard. The tears that he's been holding back well up, and Raph turns around on his heels. He strides forward and then stoops down, making himself as small as possible with a waterlogged smile. "Casey!" Raph calls, and his voice cracks, arms reaching forward. His chest is impossibly tight again, but he doesn't care. This is all that matters.

Cassandra's expression melts from one of stark surprise to a quiet fondness, and she crouches to let Casey back onto the floor. Upon the sight of Raph's outstretched arms, Casey races over to him. There's no hesitation until he reaches Raph, and suddenly, Raphael doesn't know what to do with himself. He's become this small human's pap, and he loves little Case with all of his heart. His hands shake, and he can't seem to stop them. He hovers, more concerned than ever that he would somehow hurt Casey. It turns out that his uncertainty doesn't matter. Casey blinks at Raph owlishly, then turns towards the hand that isn't a prosthetic. Raph's heart clenches. Casey reaches out, settling his tiny hand in Raph's. It's barely big enough to circle around one of Raph's fingers halfway. Casey smiles, holding onto the hand even tighter. He hugs it with his whole body, and Raph can only stand so much. His throat burns and his tears make an appearance as he pulls the child—no, his son—close. He holds him against his face, eye closing. He's so small. Everything is clear now.

This war, this fight… It’s for their future. They fight for their right to hand down a world that is secure, safe, and bright. They fight for the right to live freely. They fight to ensure that their children will never have to face the same hardship that their guardians did. It's worth fighting for, down to the last drop of blood, and the last shred of breath.

Raphael doesn't want to, but he knows he has to. He pulls back, releasing Casey from his hug. Case giggles again in response, and his small hands reach for Raph's face. "Oh, Casey. Papa will be back very soon." He smiles through his tears, and Casey grows serious. Raphael can't help but be startled at the determination on Casey's young face, and he has to hold his breath as Case brushes away the tears from his face. Raph nudges his forehead against Casey's one last time, gentle and loving. He pushes his child towards the crowd that's accumulated to bid them luck and goodbye. Despite his young age, Casey seems to realize that it's time to say goodbye. He backs away, but he waves to Raphael the entire time.

With newfound strength and courage fortifying his soul, Raph can feel his ninpo practically crackling. He's going to bring down the Krang, no matter what. For his brothers. For the Resistance. For all those that he lost. For Casey. He lifts an arm to scrub at his face, getting rid of the remainder of his tears. When he talks again, his voice is strong and booms through the halls. "Let's move out!"

Raphael leads the entourage. His expression is set in stone, and his remaining eye burns with untamable fire.

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Somehow, Raph has always known that it would end this way. He's not one for grand maniacal plans like Donnie, not strategic like Leo, or even as mystically talented as Mikey. There is one thing that he knows how to do, something that he's better at than anybody else.

He knows it'll take everything he has.

But that's okay. It gives his brothers, Casey, April, and everyone in the Resistance a fighting chance. A shot at a better future.

He doesn't tell anyone that his mind is already made up. The chaos of the battle rages around them, but all sound is muffled to Raphael. There is an eerie calm descending on him. He can feel the dead weight of Leo in his arms. He glances around, and that's all he needs to conclude that they're in trouble. They're out of options. The sound of screams and cries of their people fighting—and losing—echo. It pierces through the shrouded veil that is surrounding Raphael. A newfound clarity settles, and the knowledge of what he's about to do makes him ache for all those he's leaving behind.

I'm sorry, Casey, he thinks, swallowing. Papa won't be making it home.

"Donnie. You were right," Raphael chuckles, the sound dry and wretched. He looks toward the holographic screen that has Donnie's face. "It is Leo that gets knocked out." At his words, Donatello's face twists. A flicker of understanding seems to bode before it disappears, a fierce look of denial taking over the lines of his face.

"Yes, well, I'm almost always right. 99.99% of the time," Donnie responds, his voice wrecked. It's a low sound, full of pain and a new kind of desperation.

Raphael lays Leonardo down, his ministrations endlessly careful and gentle. He forgets about his strength often because he's a tank; he's as destructive as he is obstinate. Even still, he is careful with his unconscious brother. Leo's prosthetic is destroyed. Raph glances at his own.

A Krang hound overwhelms Leo while he fights hundreds of others; it manages to sink its teeth into the metal of Leo's arm. Raph can do nothing but watch in horror as the hound shakes Leo like a ragdoll. The hound continues to slam the turtle around repeatedly with brutal strength as if it was determined to rip Leo's arm out of its socket as it had already done once before. In Raphael's hurry, he tackles the dog with his full body weight after he wrestles his way closer, sending Krang creatures sprawling from the sheer force he plows through them with. Leo slams into the ground, and the impact is hard enough to knock him out cold with a pained grunt. Raphael growls, the sound twisting into a bone-chilling snarl. His hands grasp the top of the Krang mutt's jaw in a crushing grip, the other latching onto the lower jaw. With a furious cry, Raph wrenches the dog's mouth open. Unnatural howls leave the creature's mouth as it struggles, its screams of pain growing more frequent. Raphael doen't stop there. Once the alien releases the wreckage that had once been Leo's prosthetic, Raphael gives a mighty heave accompanied by a roar of rage. How dare the Krang take Leo's arm again?

The gory sound of bones snapping and the wet, horrid sound of skin ripping fill the air until Raph releases the remains of what had been a Krang creature from his hands. He sucks in deep breaths of air, panting from the extra exertion of strength. He steps away from the bloody carnage, stumbling towards Leo. He presses his head to Leo's plastron, relief flooding in at the sound of a heartbeat. "Leo," he calls, throat hoarse. He shakes his brother, hoping to rouse him. "Leo!" There is no response. He's out cold, injured, and without an arm. Raphael has no way of getting him to safety.

His closed eye opens. Raphael shakes himself out of his reverie of recounting memories. He knows what he has to do. "Don, how long until the shuttles arrive?" He questions. He sounds calm, even to his own ears. He sees Donatello look away towards his wrist screen, and Raph knows what the answer is before Donnie even says it. Donnie's eyes are distant, his brain racing. It's going a mile a minute only to come to the same conclusion. Nothing. Donnie can't move, Mikey is overwhelmed and fighting to get people to safety, and Leo is unconscious. Raph is the last mutant standing.

"Donnie." Raph calls again. He still wants to hear the answer. His gaze is fixed on the holo screen, and Donnie looks back at him with fervent eyes.

"15 minutes." The answer is delivered in a voice that sounds small and defeated. Raphael nods. His nod is more to himself than anything. Everything comes at a price.

"Don. Remember what Raph said, okay?" That's all Raph has to say before a wretched cry sounds from Donnie.

"No! There's another way, we still have time! Raphael, don't fucking do this!" Donnie's panic, rage, and pain are imprinted clearly in his desperate plea. He knows what Raphael is about to do. Raphael only looks at him through the holo screen. He knows what he looks like. He looks grim, determined. Fierce. Donnie reads his intentions loud and clear and tries again anyway. Raph feels as if someone is twisting a katana in his heart when he sees the way Donatello's face crumples, the way his head slumps. He tips his head downwards. "Please, Raph. Please, don't do this. Please," Donnie begs, but there's nothing Raphael can give him as an answer. They have no choice. Donnie knows this. Raphael looks away from the screen. He looks down at Leonardo and the destroyed prosthetic. Wordlessly, Raphael smiles. It's soft, affectionate. Leo looks so young like this. Raph reaches over, and his large fingers find the spot he's looking for on his arm. His prosthetic detaches with a hiss. He presumes where he's going, he won't need this. He hears Donnie make a sound that sounds like a mournful, cut-off cry. Donatello is smart. He's already put together why Raph is doing this. There aren't many supplies to rebuild prosthetics anymore. Raph carefully places his metal arm over Leo. It positions over him as if it's cradling and holding the younger turtle.

"Donatello." The use of his full name forces Donnie to look up, and there are tears running down his face without reserve. Raphael grins, his infamous snaggletooth making an appearance. "Take care of yourself. Raph will always be with you. Don't blame yourself, or anyone else. I know you all, and I know you will keep fighting. Beat them for me. Then, when you win, like a boss-" Raph emphasizes, his voice trembling for just a moment, "-remember me. Tell everyone how much I love them." Donnie says nothing. He's looking away from Raphael now, and Raph understands.

Raphael stands up. The dust and wind generated by the battlefield whip the tail ends of his bandanna around. He takes a deep breath. His mind flashes to all the people he's met in his life. Behind his eyelids, all his memories play out. Mikey. Donnie. Leo. April. Splinter. Barry. Cassandra. The Resistance. Casey. His heart seems to swell. It's for them. A fierce inferno suddenly sparks to life, fueled by all his grief, love, and passion. He's doing this for them. He will protect them, even if it's the last thing he does.

When Raph opens his eye, it glows red. Surges of energy crawl over his body as electricity would, and his teeth grit. There is no more fear. He takes a step forward, and the very ground shakes from the force. Already, his ninpo has grown his size. Bigger, he thinks.

Another earth-shattering thud. Pain surges through him, his body warning him of its constraints. He ignores it. Bigger.

This time, the earth cracks open under his foot as he takes another step. The pain is excruciating. Raphael can see the red lines spidering through his flesh, the cracks he absorbs with his entire body. His form remains solid. With each movement, his body is falling apart. He knows that if he continues, his body will tear itself apart. He will break like glass, and he will die. The thought doesn't do anything for him, and it only emboldens him to go faster. "Bigger!" He roars, his voice carrying through the battlefield in a cry so searing and fierce, he gains the attention of the lead Krang.

Krang creatures scatter from under his feet. Those that don't, he crushes. He is far from caring. He moves his way forward, soul on fire. If he can protect his people, his family, Raph will gladly feed his soul as fodder to his ninpo. His eye is fixated on the lead Krang as he fast approaches. Even from this distance, he can see the way the disgusting pink flesh alien's arrogance melts away into pure, unadulterated fear. It feels good. Raph grins, and he knows that his form follows suit. By the time the Krang realizes his intentions, it's too late. The roar of rage, fear, and defeat that Raphael hears is music to his ears as he grasps the Technodrome. His sheer size dwarfs the once massive ship. It fits into his hands the way a ball would, and his sudden fury at the thought of all those he lost to this alien ship causes his fingers to grasp tighter. His fingertips dig into the ship, and the groaning creak it gives as he crushes it bit by bit is exhilarating.

Raphael lifts it above his head. His ninpo holds strong, but he can feel every molecule of his body breaking under the pressure. He looks up at the sky. He'd wanted to see the blue skies with everyone at the end. At least, this way, he could help them do that, even if it's without him. His eye closes. I'm so proud of you all. I'll see you again. For now, this is Raph out. Like a boss. With a heaving cry that threatens to cleave the sky open and rip the very fabric of time, Raph opens his one eye. Tears fall from it as he fixates it on the lead Krang, his savage smirk only growing wider. He swings his raised arms down, slamming the Technodrome ship down with all of his strength. He screams, channeling every fiber of his being into ensuring that the ship is completely, utterly destroyed. They will never endanger their people with this ship again.

There is a burst of light accompanied by an earthquake that topples buildings and splits the ground, dust clogging the sky in a dirty mist that is impossible to see through. With it, shards of red float and swirl through the air. Everyone who knows what it is also knows what it means.

Raphael is gone.

--------------------------------------------

There's nothing Mikey can do. He watches as his brother tears himself apart to fight against the Krang. He watches in horror as Raphael screams in equal parts fury and agony, destroying something that is a detrimental blow to the Krang. His hands shake, and his vision blurs, but he can't look away. A sob rips from his throat as he holds Leo, his eyes fixated on the crackling red figure in the distance. One hand cradles Leo while the other is clenched tightly on Raph's prosthetic arm. Somehow, Raphael knew. Somehow. Mikey doesn't know if Raphael is able to hear him, but he grasps the fingers of Raphael's prosthetic as if he is clutching onto his hand. "I'm here! Raph, I'm here! You're not alone, I'm here!" He screams like a wild animal; his tears and grief are unending. He screams as loud as he can, hoping, praying, willing that Raphael hears that he's not alone and that Michelangelo will keep his promise.

He looks until he is forced to close his eyes at the burst of light. There is no one but Mikey to catalog Raphael's final moments. He has to remember, to see everything.

When he opens his eyes. all he sees is a crumbling red figure. It deteriorates, shards floating in the air before it disintegrates. Almost like it never existed. As if Raphael never existed. Mikey stays where he is, too stunned and grief-stricken to even cry out anymore. He watches as Raphael's ninpo disappears. He feels reality slipping from his grasp. His mind can't help but shy away from the possibility that Raphael is truly gone. He denies such a reality, but even that comes to a stop. Something red flits down from the sky, and Mikey reaches up. His ninpo grasps the item, and when he brings it closer, Mikey feels his heart shatter. In his trembling hand is Raphael's bandanna. The only remnant of their brother's body. The only proof that he existed, other than their ashen memories. With shaky hands, Michelangelo brings it closer. He lays Leo down and looks around. Almost numbly, he takes Leo's abandoned odachi. He ties the strip of red around the handle, closes his eyes, and presses his forehead against it. He's only like that for a moment before his eyes open again. The fire that burns within is an anger that burns brighter than magma in a volcano.

In another time, Mikey hadn't understood the word hate. The concept had eluded his grasp. Now... Now he knows what hate is, and more. His loathing now knows no bounds. He hates the Krang. He loathes them. The embers of his hate lodge in his throat as he snarls silently, eyes beginning to glow a fierce yellow. He burns with the force of the sun, his usual warm rays of light turning cruel. He will destroy them all. His orange bandanna falls from his face in ashes, and with it, his hair is released. He faces the enemy that has regrouped shakily from Raph's attack. The enemy that now has set their eyes upon their allies and the rest of them. Mikey knows that the shuttles have landed. He is the last line of defense against the enemy and his allies that need time to escape.

He's never been more glad for that fact. His power crackles, surrounding him like a violent whirlwind. The power surges through his body, and he can feel it chipping away at the years he has left in his body. His hair grows longer, blowing in the wind of his rage without his bandanna to hold it back. He floats, rising higher and higher into the sky as his power builds like a hurricane. He raises his arms, and Michelangelo holds onto his ninpo with a savage ferocity that almost outweighs the pain at the knowledge that Raph is now gone. His fury reaches new heights.

The coals that burn in his throat finally give, and the scream he lets out is like a banshee's. With it, he releases his ninpo. His power is as unforgiving and brutal as the sea, waves of light matching the caliber of a primordial force perhaps as old as time. It floods over the battlefield like an ocean, golden light rolling in with the strength of a tidal wave and the speed of a riptide. He screams again, but it is a wordless cry of unmatched wrath. Michelangelo will burn them. He will destroy every single one until there's nothing by ash and death. They will suffer the way that they have suffered. The blinding wave of light engulfs the approaching Krang, and with inhuman, blood-curdling shrieks, they burn in the fire of Michelangelo's hate.

Mikey lands down, his feet on the ground. He pants as he looks at the razed land before them. Suddenly, all his strength ebbs from him as he falls to his knees. He feels empty. With a sudden hiccuping sob, Michelangelo raises his hands to his face, burrowing into them as he cries uncontrollably. Raphael is still gone.

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Donatello numbly watches as his wrist pad notifies him that the shuttle is arriving in 10 minutes. He feels detached. Everything is hazy, layered in a white fog. He feels as if nothing matters. He stays where he is, his eyes distant. His thoughts are quiet, for once. There's just... Nothing. He stares blankly at the horizon. He hadn't been able to see Raph's sacrifice. He isn't sure if he should feel grateful for that or not, so he doesn't think about it at all. There are other Krang and people fighting, but Donatello can't seem to pull himself together. It's all just so... Distant. Like he's not with this reality anymore. The logical part of his brain wonders if the powerful surges of energy and the earth-shattering showdown that has occurred have somehow transported him into a different universe. He almost laughs at the thought. Why does he feel nothing?

The shuttles arrive. The shuttles arrive but Donatello doesn't move. He watches as others run to the shuttle. He can't help but feel a little resentful towards them, a dull flare in the dark abyss. Do they know what sacrifice just occurred to save their lives? Are they grateful? A distant part of him observes from its detachment the observation he makes is unfair. Donnie doesn't care. In the far distance, he sees April looking around. He can even see her face wet with tears as she searches. Some part of him knows that she's looking for him. She's looking for Leo, Mikey, Raph, or him. His distant thoughts suddenly screech to a stop. Raph. Raphael. She... She won't be able to search for him anymore. She won't find him. Suddenly, everything becomes too sharp. Too clear. The agony that rushes in almost makes him wish for the detached daze he had just been in.

It's at that time that he hears Mikey's scream. It emotes all that he's feeling, and it delivers a blow so gut-wrenching that whatever breath is left in Donnie's lungs is stolen away. Another blinding white light envelops the field, and this time, he knows that it's Michelangelo. This knowledge makes this new reality jarringly, horrifically real.

Raphael is dead.

Just as the numb daze is about to return, Donatello is made aware of the hiccupping sobs that undoubtedly belong to Mikey. All his doubts disappear, and he is confronted with the reality that they've gone from four brothers to three. It's here that Donnie realizes—he'd never gotten to say goodbye. He'd never been able to tell Raphael that he loves him, too. Something wet trails down his face. He's shocked for a moment before he realizes, once again, that it's his tears. They run hot, splashing down his cheeks and onto his collarbone. Then, it's like the floodgates open. His shoulders shake as he wails, face upturned towards the sky as he screams, shouts, and rages. He can't breathe, but Donatello doesn't care. He doesn't. Everything hurts. Raphael had died alone, protecting them.

Donatello's sobs join Mikey's as they howl at the sky like feral, wounded animals, their grief raw and insurmountable. It presses on both of their shoulders, through their plastrons, and into their chests; the weight is so heavy that Donatello wonders if he'll ever be able to stand up again.

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