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rai-knightshade-art · 1 year

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"...when I'm lying wrapped up in your arms, the whole World just fades away; the only thing I hear is the Beating of your Heart..."

Breathe, by Faith Hill

"...we should talk about this, right?"

His voice is soft, when he speaks; you wouldn't be able to hear him, if you weren't lying on his chest.

You draw patterns across his skin with your finger, contemplative. "Maybe. I'm not really sure how, though."

He makes a humming noise; you can feel the vibrations more than you can hear them. It's a moment before he speaks, and in the quiet you feel his arm move, a tendril of your hair lifting with it. (He always did like playing with your hair.)

Finally, he speaks. "Maybe we should start with... Being honest, with each other. Say what we really feel. Tell the truth."

You lift up your head, until you can rest your chin on your arm, and look at him; he's staring right back, eyes a warm brown, filled with affection.

You lift your other hand, to play with his own unruly curls, as you think. Honesty, huh? You've always been good at hiding your feelings, concealing the truth. How honest do you want to be, really?

But... Looking into his eyes, shining in the moonlight... You find you can't hide anything. Not from him. Not anymore.

"If honesty means telling the truth... Well then, the truth is, I'm still in love with you."

The fanfiction this scene is from is currently in progress, but you can read Chapter 1 here!

Bonus Post 1 (Jesse and Beca's Playlists): Link

Bonus Post 2 (The Bonus Tracks): Link

Artist thoughts, an alternate edit, links to my other RarePair Week entries, and close ups below the cut; image ID is in the alt text.

....y'all don't wanna know how long this thing took me 😅. For the illustration OR the first chapter of the associated fic, really.

Yeah so soft!Jeca lives rent free in my head, like, constantly these days, and I'm making that everybody's problem now, sorry. 😅 And when I saw the prompts for the Pitch Perfect RarePair Week, specifically #5, I knew immediately what I had to do: a fanfic/fanfic illustration! (...Or 2. ........or 5....😂)

I've actually been working on this fanfic for... A while, shall we say, because I had a LOT of thoughts that I needed out of my head and a fanfic was the best way to accomplish that. I wasn't sure when I was gonna try to have it done, figured it would get there when it gets there, but this prompt fit just too perfectly not to take advantage of it, ya know? So my new plan was to have the fanfiction done in time to upload with this prompt, buuuutttt.... That didn't quite happen 😓 ya girl's been busy alright!

But. But. I did get Chapter 1 finished! And uploaded! A day early, no less! ...Except Chapter 1 doesn't actually include the prompt line in it, that'll be in Chapter 2 😅. So uh. That'll be written here soon, I promise. In the meantime, at least there's Chapter 1! AND bonus posts, linked above the cut! Check them out!

Now, to set the scene: we're 6 months past the ending of Pitch Perfect 3, keeping everything from canon (except for the Chloe/Chicago thing but that's not relevant here, that's relevant for a different pair of days). We're 2 and a half years post-Jesse and Beca breaking up due to the fact that their lives and careers were taking off on opposite ends of the continent; it was an amicable breakup, but not a happy one, and while both of them have moved on from the relationship (and Jesse has had--and then broken up with--another long term girlfriend), they both still harbor some feelings for each other. They both think that ship has sailed though...until Beca moves to LA as part of her partnership with DJ Khaled, right when the producers of the movie Jesse and his team are scoring have asked Khaled to write and produce an original song for their movie, and wouldn't you know it, he has a brand new, extremely talented music producer who'd be perfect for the project!

So of course, Jesse and Beca reunite completely by surprise, take some time to talk a few things out once they've each panic-called their respective in-town confidants Benji and Emily to freak out a little bit but it's fine they're chill, and start to reconnect over this new project they have together... And afternoon visits to the neighboring cafe, mutually grabbing lunch at a nearby combination-deli-and-bookstore, and, finally, a week after the Big Damn Reunion™, an actual honest-to-god dinner date-that's-definitely-a-first-date-but-they-won't-admit-it, at a fancy (but not too fancy, they're not quite stars yet) restaurant and everything.

This scene? Comes directly after that dinner; or, rather, it comes directly after they've finished their dinner, and Jesse (ever the gentleman) has walked Beca home, all the way up to her apartment door; it comes after they've just stood there for a long moment, neither really wanting to make the first move to leave, until, finally, Beca literally says "Fuck it!" And drags the poor man into the apartment by the lips and collar. 😂 After all that, here in the dead of night, under the moonlight, they finally just... Talk. Really talk, not just the small talk from the deli/bookstore, or discussing their project in the studio, or even the brief acknowledgements of their past and the ways they've each moved on, from that first day in the cafe. Now, they talk through everything. How they're feeling, what they want this thing between them to be... How absolutely fucking terrified they are of screwing this up again... And how much they want to try again anyways. This scene, right here, is the true beginning of their eventual, maybe-it-was, maybe-it-wasn't, maybe-it-doesn't-matter-if-it-was-or-wasn't, inevitable, happily ever after. Because, well... "If honesty means telling the truth... Well then, the truth is I'm still in love with you."

Below are some close ups to show the details I added--like Beca's plaques!--as well as an alternate edit with lower contrast, because I couldn't decide whether I liked the glow effects better or the dim nighttime atmosphere better. So, both. And finally, below that are the links to the rest of my RarePair Week entries!

Alternate low-contrast version (I couldn't decide which vibes I liked better so y'all get both):

Close Ups:

Days I'm Participating In (and the Entries I've Posted):

Day 1 (this is me trying): Link

Day 2 (I've missed you): Link

Day 5 (if honesty means telling the truth... Then the truth is I'm still in love with you): You Are Here!

Day 6 (there's no way that it's not going to happen with you looking at me like that): Link

Day 7.1 (I can't say it, so I'll sing it): Link

Day 7.2 (part 2): Link

#jeca #jesse x beca #beca x jesse #pitch perfect #jeca fanart #jeca fanfiction #fanart #fanfiction #myposts #myart #theyre in love your honor #and theyre SO soft about it #pitch perfect rare pair week #pprpw22 #pprpw22.5

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peaterookie · 1 year

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Lupin III Chapter 49 Review

chapter 49 is the start of the white collar series, where lupin poses as a employee in various(?) office jobs and fucks things up i guess!

id also like to show the magazine cover of this chapter, just because it looks so sick. this is also one of the rare times lupin is illustrated with a yellow jacket, so that something quite noteworthy about it

i also just really like the use of primary colors and abstract vibes of the drawing pre new adventure art style isn't my favorite but im starting to find its charm of it c:

the chapter starts off with lupin running out of an office building with a suitcase. his dalmatian friend is there too it turns out that he's gotten a very important contract from a different company, and he is going to give it to his boss- apparently he works for a transport company of some sort

he doesn't steal it mind you, lupin steals most things but I think given the context that hes working as a regular exployee, he just got it through some business meeting

wow! a colored page i found on the internet! (i wish i remembered where i got it from, might be from lupin central?) you might've also seen this somewhere too, so this is the chapter where it came from.

you can see him driving away with his dog as misnames the dogs a few time and gets his ass ripped apart for it a lot of this chapter is colored, but while it does look quite nice, its not when it would end up being black and white when turned into a volume :(

as my friend puts it, refering to the this panel: "The lack of colors made it so hard to figure out what's happening that I thought something was emerging out of his ass and it was like a goop / monster / his disguise skin peeling off into a living amalgamation"

lupin comes back to his boss to present the contract to him, but he gets berated since the boss didn't need this contract despite lupin thinking it would be important he leaves the office annoyed and overhears his co-workers saying that the boss was fired lupin then rushes back to the boss to find out what happened

im not gonna fucking type out the english text because its plain confusing so ill try my best to explain it

they're under trouble since the contract lupin got was from an oil company that gave them all rights to international shipping while it seemed really good and had a lot of opportunity for them to gain money, he had to cancel it why did he have to cancel it lupin asks? because the contract required the company to ship all of the oil company's product… including the oil bomb they have. its simply too risky for them to transport something so fragile as that, so he cancels it and lupin has fucked his company up!

its so weird talking about lupin having a normal office job god

we then get lupin and jigen reflecting on their situation, its essentually just exposition dump ive just explained already jigen wonders why lupins even having this office work in the first place, and he then figures out its just a heist lupins planning

now lupin is working out a plan to find a way to transport the oil bomb efficiently without blowing up i guess the boss could uncancel it anytime?? so lupins trying to win him back again

we then get introduced to another fujiko mine, who says that shes now working with lupin as his secretary (he likes her already) she picks up the plan and we get another instance of mp having to write new panels for the volume again lol

lupin then proposes the plan to his boss, which rips it apart! saying that hes already heard of it and accuses lupin of copying the plan from another employee!!

this employee in question is a man called okite, which the story implies he may have been the one to copy lupin's plan and just proposed it first but who knows that might just be me they have the same objective, but now theyre on a race to see which one can move the oil bomb first

hmm why do i remember this story already before… (tac tics)

while lupin talks to jigen again about the situation, okite finds lupin and says that he knows what lupins motives are he also knows lupin's real identity, and that he would just steal from his plan in order to transport the bomb himself! we never really get an explanation of what lupin's motivations are but i guess he might just want to use that bomb for something bad i guess??? or he just became a office worker for fun idk that sounds like something he would do in his free time

lupin leaves okite alone, but just warns him that he might want to keep those plans of his safe…

the next day, okite shows the boss his plan, and he rips it apart!! revealing that lupin had already shown this plan to him beforehand!! get played fool.

we then switch to lupin having a simply joyous time in his bed, while fujiko enters his room, saying that she needs to use his shower, since hers is broken bro what is she plotting she also gets on the same bed with lupin, which he totally ignores the red flags and thinks that she wants to have sex with him which she DOESN'T she suspects from the rumors that lupin might be a thief and stole okite's plan, and she's gonna fucking kill him ah good lord

she reveals that she's actually okite's girlfriend and ALSO WORKING FOR ZENIGATA AHHH HES HERE

put zenigata in when they least expected it - mp 1968

lupin tries to escape, but he gets handcuffed to the bed… and zenigata says some ridiculous line here in the english version

L: Handcuffs!? Z: Damn, you're kinky Lupin. They'll love that in prison.

can someone confirm that he actually says that in the japanese version because this sounds so tokyopoppy

he then tries to arrest lupin in, but lupin then stops them and presents them a very very small bit of an oil bomb... saying that if they take him in, he'll drop it and explode the entire place down!!! oh no!!!!

ok hold on what does an oil bomb look like it doesnt say BUT HOW IS THIS AN OIL BOMB

ITS JUST SOME FUNKY MINECRAFT CUBE zenigata doesn't believe lupin either, thinking its just a bluff and shoots the bomb-

and no one would've guessed it

lupin was not bluffing.

the end!

#how the hell was lupin carrying that small bit of the oil bomb the entire time #didnt jigen say that a single shake would explode the thing???#lupin the third #lupin iii #local lupin manga fan screams about the manga as per usual

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lesfeldickbiblestudy · 6 months

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When does the Bible indicate that the tribulation will begin? [convertplayer id="nN2q2Yds4" width="700" height="525"] Consider the timeline in relation to II Peter 3:8: "But, beloved, be not ignorant of this one thing, that one day is with the Lord as a thousand years, and a thousand years as one day." Consider it is also in conjunction with Genesis Chapter 1 in which the creation of the world, the universe, and all that is in them, including mankind is described as being completed in six days. Notice that the first six days of creation were for man's benefit (Isaiah 45:18 says that the earth was formed to be inhabited), but the seventh day was for God - a day of rest. So, consider the following hypothesis: If 1,000 years is to God as a day, according to the timeline, we can see that man has just about used up his "six days" or 6,000 years (if our calendars are at all accurate). Are we about to enter into God's day - the "seventh day" or the final 1,000 years? We are seeing the signs of the times in the wars, earthquakes, famines, and pestilences we hear about on the news daily. Terms being used today such as "global economy," "global politics," and "new age" are all indicative of the fact that we are very close to the end of our age. The stage is being set for Daniel's 70th week (see Daniel 9). [convertplayer id="qor9Pv2cU" width="700" height="525"] John 9:16 "Therefore said some of the Pharisees, This man is not of God, because he keepeth not the sabbath day. Others said, `How can a man that is a sinner do such miracles? And there was a division among them.'" Move on to Chapter 11. We've come through the blind man which was healed of blindness which he had since birth; sin is mentioned as well as with the impotent man; they were next to the pool which indicated a need for cleansing. Now to Lazarus and he's dead. John 11:17 "Then when Jesus came, he found that he (Lazarus) had lain in the grave four days already." What does I Peter say in regard to a day in God's mind? A thousand years is but a day, and a day is but a thousand years. So, picking up the analogy that we are dealing with the Nation of Israel just like the blind man who had been blind since birth, how long has the Nation of Israel literally been spiritually dead? 4000 years. That takes you back to Abraham at 2000 BC So, I think the four days of Lazarus' death is an indication that Israel, nationally, is spending 4000 years spiritually dead. But what will happen at the end of the 4000 years? She will be brought back to life. I realize this is a little bit backwards, but come back to verse 6; hopefully you are getting the picture. But here in verse 6, word came to Jesus that Lazarus was sick, and they knew that if Jesus would come that He could heal him. John 11:6 "When he had heard therefore that he was sick, he (purposely) abode two days still in the same place where he was." And then what will He do? He will go to where Lazarus is and raise him from the dead. Look at the Book of Hosea for a moment: Hosea 6:1,2 "COME, and let us return unto the LORD: for he hath torn, and he will heal us; he hath smitten, and he will bind us up." The pronouns here are the Nation of Israel. "After two days will he revive us: in the third day he will raise us up, and we shall live in his sight." What are the two days? Well the two days since the Cross is how long? 2000 years. What's going to be the third thousand years? The Kingdom. See how beautifully this all fits. Now, back to Lazarus for a moment. He calls Lazarus forth. Does Lazarus contribute anything? Nothing. Remember he came out of the tomb. And that is the picture of Israel. One day they are going to be called back to life, nationally, and we will get to it in our next lesson.

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lilacsandwhiskey · 2 years

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Mean Something // Chapter 11

Warning; language, consumption of alcohol

catch up here

*Five years later…

The clock.

All Drew could focus on was the ticking of the clock on the wall. He stared out of his window, hands clasped together across his stomach, thumbs twiddling.

The first time he could breathe in two weeks, the first real moment he’s had time to sit down and focus on where he was. Currently in Charleston, filming a show, and way too aware that he was in the same area as you. He’d be in the same area for months.

His fingers had hovered over your contact way too many times to count. It’d be five years. Five years since he heard your voice in person, or even speaking directly to him. He knew he’d hurt you, he was crazy to think that he could try to lie without breaking someone’s heart, including his own.

He watched your life through pictures and videos, communicating with a trusty “like” every now and then. Drew had kept up with several things about you through social media, like you’d gotten the job where you interned, you’d made some new friends, but still kept up with Josie. You’d moved into your own place, sharing small glimpses into the place you’d made yours. He was aware of the few guys you’d dated here and there, but kept up with how often you’d delete all of the posts with them.

A knock came on Drew’s door, interrupting his thoughts. “Hey man, you ready?” JD asks. “Yeah, I’ll be right there.” Drew replies, swinging his legs over the chair and grabbing a ball cap from the dresser. He makes his way into the shared living room, pushing his hair back and sliding his cap over it. “Let’s get drunk!” Madelyn says with a laugh, raising her arm to sling around Madison.

Drew puffs out his cheeks as he slides his wallet out, showing his ID, and slipping into the dimly lit bar just minutes from their place. Drew could spot tourists, like him, and the locals who seemed to have been there for hours already.

“You okay?” Austin asks, nudging his friend. “Yeah, for sure, dude. Let’s get a drink.” Drew responds, eyes busied with the commotion in front of him. He had to admit, every where they’d went, the grocery store, drug store, restaurants, his eyes had been searching. In between his busy schedule, and the quick trips, his mind wandered to what he would say if he saw you - if you’d even say a word to him.

Drew slumps into a chair at the bar, ordering a bottle, and spinning his chair around. The night was still young and he knew that he’d have to keep up with everyone. He saw Chase and Rudy already taken shots in the corner, a vision that he was used to by now in their shared house.

Bad karaoke and sad country songs seemed to be the only thing that filled his ears as he moved to a high top with his friends, deepened conversations occurring. Drew couldn’t seem to focus though “Have you?” Madison nods to Drew, grinning. “Hm?” “Have you ever been in love?” Drew falters for a minute, rubbing his chin with his hand. “Once.”

——————

“All you do is woooork. Can you just enjoy one night out?” Mae wrapped her arm around your own, lying her head on your shoulder. “Seriously, you look hot. It’s time to get you out more than once every two months.” Hayden adds.

The three of you push through the cobbled streets of Charleston after they’d shown up at your door, while you were dressed clad in your baggy pajama pants and a tshirt, enjoying popcorn and a glass of wine. The original plan had for them to come over and enjoy the night in, but after much (I mean, much) convincing, you gave in.

Wristbands slid on, you walk into the door, immediately making your way to high top in the corner before Hayden is pushing her way to the bar. Mae hikes up on the seat next to you, tapping her fingers to the music. “So, are you going to share with me your good news?” You say, urging your friend.

She looks over at you with a smile. “How’d you know?” “Why else would you force me? How did the interview go?” “I landed the job!” “Oh my gosh!” You cheered, slinging an arm over your friend and pulling her in for a hug. “I’m so damn proud of you!” You remark. Hayden walks up, smiling ear to ear. “We knew you would get it!”

The three of you bask in the excitement over drinks, laughter and inside jokes being thrown around. “I missed this.” You say with a content sigh. “You have no idea.” Mae responds. “How are things with Ben?” You turn to Hayden. “Better, I guess.” She says with a shrug. “I think we just need time apart.” You nod as she talks.

“Hey, I’m going to grab another drink. Anyone need anything?” You ask, jumping off the chair. “Still working on this one.” You give a thumbs up before walking towards the bar with your empty glass. You set it on the counter, waiting for the bartender to come back by.

“What can I get ya?” “Vodka cran please.” You slump against the counter with a smile. As you wait, you look around at everyone surrounding you. You take in the moment of being alone in a crowded room, something you began taking comfort in more recently.

With life being so wild, you were grateful for moments like this, even if it was in the middle of a bar.

A guy moved in between you and the next person, leaning over the counter as he waits for the bartender. His back is turned towards you, appearing to talk to the person in front of him.

You step back an inch, watching as he makes conversation with everyone at the bar, including you when he turns around. “Ah shit, am I in your way?” “No you’re good.” You respond. He nods, obviously drunk already. “I’m just grabbing my friend a drink. I’m being cut off.” He rolls his eyes. You grin, noticing his glossy eyes and messy hair. “How many have you had?” The blonde boy jokingly counts on his fingers, squinting up as he counts out loud, before looking at you and shrugging with a laugh.

The two of you sit in comfortable new companionship as you wait for your drink and he waits to order. You rest your head in your hand as you take a seat at the bar. “Ah shit, he found me.” The guy says, leaning back. “Who?” “My friend. He doesn’t actually know I’m getting this drink for him - he needs to let a little off the edge. He’s been in a mood today.” He shrugs with a laugh.

“I need you back before Madelyn breaks her neck. She’s already broke a heel.” The guy’s friend says. That’s when you stop in your tracks just by the sound of his voice. It can’t be. How the hell could it be? You sit up tall, swallowing hard as you turn your head.

“Holy shit.” He mutters under his breath. Your mouth drops. “Um, oh my god. Drew?”

Babes: @craftyalmondghostflap @pogueslandia @cosmoeticss @livvieclinestarkeys @belongtoyou-u @drewstarkcy @drewsgfduh @fashphotolife @luversgirl @gryffindorpouge11 @lurkymurker @marveloussensations @graysonsbde @k-k0129 @westrnwoods @roxicircuu @elizabethrosecresswell @writingsbehaviour

#drew starkey #drew starkey imagine #drew starkey angst #drew starkey blurb #drew starkey fanfic #drew starkey fluff #drew starkey x reader #mean something #drew starkey obx #drew starkey one shot

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nalledimessi · 3 years

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Chapter one: Back Home.

Hello there friends! Sorry for not been here so often now but i have somethings to deal with, but I'm glad to be back and with a serie of my own. I hope you like it, love it, share it and comment. Feedback, reblogs and you keep me going and is love for me!

Before we start I want to leave special regards to my friend @imgoingtofreakoutnow because without her this serie couldn't be possible. Annie, friend, I love you and I'm still can't thank you enough for help me with this. Also thanks to @elijahs-wife hope to see you soon and I hope you're taking care of yourself.

Dividers by @firefly-graphics

Tag's @valsworldofcreativity @avala-moon

You stop the engine once you are in the driveway of your home, the same house you shared with him not long ago. You hesitate for a few minutes, playing with the keys in your hand. If only he was here, you think for yourself before taking a deep breath and opening the door. The dark surrounds you while you close the door behind you, leaving your keys and purse on the side table to then walk towards the counter leaving the take-out food on it.

“[Y/N]” his voice coming out of the shadows.

It would never stop to amazed you how he pronounces your name, so soft and so intimate. You sigh resting your hands on the counter, closing your eyes trying to stop the tears that want to get out desperately. “What are you doing here, Elijah? You made it clear you wouldn’t return” you question him before turning to see him.

“The truth of the matter is…” he says, taking his hands to his trousers’ pockets and standing straight, “I still have feelings for you and no matter how hard I try,” —he drops his gaze momentarily to then fix it in yours— “a part of me just doesn’t want to let go” he declares. “[Y/N] I give you…”

“Don’t you dare to finish that” you interrupt him with crystal gaze and anger in your voice, “we both know that as soon Klaus needs you, you won’t hesitate to leave everything behind” —you sigh— “including me, to run to him.” You closed your eyes trying to stop the tears at their edges. “I can’t do this anymore, Elijah” you sob, opening them again. “Please leave” you beg him.

He walks towards you and stops a few inches away, enough for you to inhale his scent. He leans over and deposits a kiss on your head. “I will leave for now.” He lingers close to you a few more seconds to then announce you: “I love you [Y/N] and that is why I have to leave” he confesses before walking out of the door and disappearing in the night.

You know you should’ve told him before, but you know him better than himself; if you had mention it, he would have been torn between choosing his brother and his unborn child.

“We’ll be fine” you say, moving your hand to your abdomen. You take your phone out of your pocket and call the only one you could count on now.

“Are you alright? Where are you?” he picks up alarmed.

“I’m fine, New Orleans” you rush to answer his questions. “I need a place to stay for a few months” you continue.

“Say no more, your room is still the same way you left it” he expresses.

“Thank you, Dean” you say relieved.

“That is what family’s for, we will be waiting for you” you hear him say before ending the call and walking upstairs to pack and go back to Lebanon, Kansas.

You rush to pack up the most essential and everything that could be used to track you down.

You look back through the rear mirror, glancing one last time at what you have called your home with Elijah these last months. -It’s better this way- you say, before starting your way back to your brothers, the Winchesters.

You reach Alexandria, wishing you could keep driving and be far away from New Orleans, Elijah and the chaos that came with being a Mikaelson, but you need to think of the safety and wellness of your child. You decide to spend only the night in Alexandria, stopping at the first motel you saw, and to continue driving at the first light of the day, obviously after breakfast.

“A room for the night” you say as soon you get to the manager office, cap over your head and a big hoodie covering you, making sure to avoid the surveillance camera that was pointing to the door.

“Card or cash?” the old man behind the counter asks while removing the room key off the board keychain.

“Cash” you respond. No way to track you that way, for anyone.

“60 dollars and I need an ID, sweetheart” he grins at you. You place your ID and money on the counter “Room 10 for [Y/N] Winchester, 2nd floor to the right”

“Thanks” you utter, taking the keys and ID from him and following his directions to your room.

Once you settle on bed, your phone starts ringing. You look at the name on the screen and pick it up.

“Hey Sammy” you greet him.

“Dean mentioned you’re coming back, is it true or he’s just playing with me?” The hope in his voice makes you smile.

“It’s true Sammy, I’m on my way. I’m spending the night in Alexandria but will hit the road first thing in the morning after breakfast” you assure him.

“It’s everything alright?” he asks concerned. He knows you after all and even if he was the youngest, he had always been the smart one.

“It’s complicated” you confess.

He chuckles. “I’m starting to think that word means Winchester”

You chuckle back. “Yeah, I think you’re right” you mention playing with the sheet of your bed.

“Alright, be safe. See you when you arrive. Love you [Y/N]”

“Love you too Sammy” you add before hanging up and plugging in your phone next to the Colt M1911A1 that Dean gave you before departing.

Standing in front of the house, Elijah notices that your car isn’t in sight and that the curtains you always keep open are closed. He walks to the entry, using his key to access the house. Looking around the first floor everything was as usual but there was no sight of you.

“[Y/N]?” he calls you from the stairs but no respond. He vamp-speeds to your room to find it completely empty; the closet without a single piece of clothing just like your drawers. The only clothes left are his, with the only exception of his dark blue dress shirt, your favorite. He takes a seat on the bed, taking his head in his palms. If only I had fought for you, he thinks for himself.

He raises his gaze at the sound of the entry door and vamp-speeds downstairs, only to appear in front of his sister. “What are you doing here Rebekah?” he questions, confused and disappointed.

“I came to see [Y/N].” She looks around. “Where she is?” she asks, setting once again his sight on her brother.

“She is gone” he announces, sad and avoiding eye contact with her, “and it seems to be my fault” he adds, taking his hand to his trousers’ pocket. “I apologize Rebekah”

“What happened?” she questions him, crossing her arms. “Don’t tell me you let her go”

He looks at her. “If I admit to you that it’s complicated, would that suffice? Or, are you determined to torment me throughout this endeavor?”

She shakes her head. “Did you push her away?”

“I came last night to arrange things between us, but she asked me to leave and so I left” he vaguely explains.

“And she was gone when you returned.” He nods.

“We should go,” he told her walking to the entrance. “There’s nothing for us here anymore” he concludes, looking around one last time before leaving the house.

It takes you more than you wanted to arrive to the bunker, but finally you are back.

“I’m home” you shout as soon you are inside, your voice followed by the sound of footsteps.

“[Y/N]! Glad you made it kiddo” you roll your eyes at Dean.

“I’m not a kiddo anymore” you say while walking down the stairs.

“You’ll always be to me.” Taking the suit case from you, he pulls you into a hug “I missed you [Y/N]” he whispers in your ear.

“I missed you too” you whisper back, hugging him.

Sam takes your bag from your shoulder and pulls you apart from Dean to crush you to his side “Glad you’re back.” He releases you a little to look at you. “You’re staying longer this time, right?” he inquires.

“Definitely” you smile, pulling back from him. “Where is Cas?” you ask after looking around the room and not seeing the angel with the trench coat.

“I’m here” he appears in front of you, looking directly at yourself. “There’s something different about you [Y/N]” he notices, squinting his eyes while scanning you.

You smile nervously. “I can assure you Cas, the same old me I was when I left. I did cut my hair though, must be it!” you rush to say.

He shakes his head “Perhaps it is.” He gives you one more look then adds “Welcome home”

“Come on,” Dean says, passing his arm over your shoulders, “unpack and refresh yourself and we will be waiting for you in the kitchen.” Dean walks you till your bedroom door.

“See you in a few” you say, taking your suit case from him and dragging it inside.

Chapter Two: Confrontations >

#waiting for you #nalledimessi #mikaelson x winchester #elijah mikaelson x winchester sister #the originals #supernatural #elijah mikaelson #winchester!sister #winchester sister #pilot #elijah mikaelson series #elijah mikaelson x reader #elijah mikaelson fan fictions #dean winchester #sam winchester #rebekah mikaelson #always & forever

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lovely-angst · 3 years

Text

a glimpse of the past

//SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 299!

pairing: hawks x reader

genre: fluff and angst

word count: 2.7k

summary: Hawks’ past was unknown to you and you were okay with that, for now at least. But when your quirk had gone out of control and you find yourself in an unfamiliar location, you spot a pair of very familiar wings.

a/n: my writing is kinda rusty here, sorry!

02.05.21

Hawks was different—not in a bad way, but in a mysterious way.

You knew so many things about him, but there were more things that you didn’t know about him.

These things he kept a secret from you didn’t keep you from loving him any less. Though there were times when it hurt because he kept them from you, Hawks would always press a soft kiss to your forehead, saying, “When the time comes, I’ll tell you.”

And because you loved him, you waited.

There were days where the only time you got to see your boyfriend was when he was on the news. Even after a rough battle against some villain, he still smiled bright and warm—It was easy to miss a person like him.

The days when he would be able to come home were your favorites by far. It usually consisted of nothing more than chicken take-out and lots of cuddles, but you didn’t mind.

Hawks was set out for a complicated mission, possibly one of the most critical missions, he explained, sparing you no further information for your safety.

It was almost time for Hawks to report to the commission as he stood in the apartment’s cozy living room the two of you shared. Your gentle hands lightly brushed away stray wrinkles on his jacket before you glanced up at him with a comforting smile.

“I’ll miss you,” he says quietly, “so much.” Your hand brushes his hair back more before you press a kiss onto his forehead, “me too.”

“Do you think you could use my quirk on you?” you ask carefully, watching as Hawks gives you a rueful smile. “Are you sure, birdie? You might not like what you see.” He could see the hesitant look in your eyes.

Your quirk allowed you to see a glimpse into the future of the person you touched as if you were there in person. If you were able to get a good hold on them, for example holding their hand, you could see the scene clearer and with greater detail.

Hawks was right to warn you—what if you saw him dead in the future?

Shaking the terrifying thought from your mind, you nodded before grabbing onto his hands. “Just to keep me from worrying more. Did you want me to tell you what I’ll see?”

“Sure,” he replied with a smile and you smiled back before closing your eyes, allowing your quirk to activate.

Structures began to take place in the black canvas of your mind before you found yourself standing in the middle of debris from a destroyed building. Turning your head, you saw Hawks in Tokoyami’s arms as the two seemed to be escaping.

Turning your head, your eyes caught on to the smoke flowing from one of the rooms, blue fire seemed to peek through gently before a shadow stood in the doorway.

Suddenly, your body came back to the present as you opened your eyes to see Hawks staring at you somewhat worriedly. “Are you okay? You seemed a little distressed while you were gone there.”

All you could do was offer him a small sorry. “I can’t seem to tell if it’s good or bad, but you were with Tokoyami. The two of you seemed to be escaping from a lot of smoke and what seemed like blue fire.”

With that, Hawks gave you a comforting smile before leaning in to place a kiss onto your forehead, “Thanks dove, keep the nest warm for me.” You nod with a chuckle from his words—he loved referring to the apartment as a nest.

When he began to walk out to the balcony ready to take off, you quickly ran over to him to pull him in for a kiss, “I love you, do your best.” Hawks stared into your eyes full of love and adoration before he too pressed a kiss onto your lips, “Will do, and I love you too,” and with that, Hawks took off.

The mission wasn’t carried out until three days later, when there had finally been a news report.

The news didn’t report much on the battle because of how dangerous it was at the scene. From what they could report on, they managed to collect footage from helicopters on all the destruction done.

The battle was all the news outlet seemed to cover. Your heart pounded in your chest every time you watched the news—you couldn’t seem to pinpoint Hawks anywhere on the footage they showed, with wings as large and red as his.

Hawks was often away for missions, but you felt especially lonely this time around. It seemed all of Tokyo was waiting to see the aftermath of all of this destruction.

All you could do was hope Hawks was okay.

Your phone jingled beside you as you glanced down to find Tokoyami’s ID flashing on your screen.

“Hello? Tokoyami? Is everything okay?” you asked worriedly. “I’m fine, I just thought you might want to come visit Hawks. The hospital is allowing close friends and family to visit, so I thought I’d give you a call.”

Your eyes teared up from his thoughtfulness. You made it a mental note to treat the student someday.

“Thank you for calling me Tokoyami, I’ll be on my way.” and with that, you hung up the phone before quickly making your way to the hospital.

It had been a few days since the war against the villains had ceased. Those injured were hospitalized right away, including your lovely boyfriend. He wasn’t allowed any visitors at the time, but it seemed things were beginning to look up.

Approached the hospital, it wasn’t easy making your way through the large group of news reporters, fans good and bad alike. Thankfully you were able to pass through into the hospital thanks to some of Hawks’ hero friends.

As you made your way through the hospital, you noticed Tokoyami standing outside Hawks’ room. “Tokoyami,” you greet loud enough for the student to hear as he turned to give you a polite bow.

“I want to thank you again for the phone call and for looking out for Hawks,” you confess, “I saw you saving him through my quirk,” Tokoyami looked shocked before he composed himself and gave you a nod. Reaching over, you pulled the boy in for a comforting hug.

“Hawks is alive because of you. You’re an amazing hero, Tokoyami. Don’t forget that, okay?” Pulling away, the young man gives you a shy smile before he nods. “Thank you, (Name)-san.”

Turning towards the door, you rest your hand on the door handle, hesitating, only to hear Tokoyami’s voice cut through your thoughts. “It’ll be alright, (Name)-san. He’s been waiting for you.”

It was your turn to nod at the male before you slide the door open, stepping inside the too quiet room filled with the constant beeps of the hospital equipment.

With a deep breath, you brush past the curtains to see your boyfriend glancing out the window from where he laid on the hospital bed. Your heart broke seeing him hooked up to multiple machines, bandages wrapped nearly around his whole body, but that wasn’t the worst part—his wings were missing.

Gently, you knocked on the door, signaling your arrival. Right away, you noticed the panicked look in his eyes as he turned to you, your smile faltering as a result. Did he not want you here?

Cautiously, you walk over to his bed, pulling out a chair for yourself as you made yourself comfortable beside his bed. “Tokoyami called me over,” you say with a gentle tone, “he’s a really nice kid, remember to treat him well.”

The overpowering feeling of trying to repress your tears that threatened to slip out was difficult. You told yourself you’d be strong for Hawks, but seeing him in such a state—it was almost impossible.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cry,” you say with a small chuckle as you began to wipe at your tears, “but it’s hard not to cry when I see you all bandaged up like this and hooked to all this equipment.” You sniffle once more, glancing over at Hawks, only to find him staring at you.

You really tried to get Hawks to settle down, but he just didn’t seem comfortable with you around. With a frown, you glanced over at him, “You look really nervous and tense right now, Hawks. Do you not want me here?”

His gold eyes shot to yours, even more, panicked now than before. Your brows furrow sadly as you watched your struggling boyfriend. Suddenly, he pointed to his throat before your eyes widened, “You can’t speak?” He nods.

Turning, you search through your bag before pulling out your phone, pressing on the notes app before handing it to him, “you can use my phone if you’d like.”

Taking your hands in his, he begins to type away before pressing the speaker button, letting your phone read out his message, “I do want you here. I just didn’t want you seeing me like this.” Giving him a sad smile, you leaned over towards him before pressing a kiss on his forehead, “Don’t be silly. How are you feeling though? Physically and mentally?”

“Not good. Tired physically and mentally,” you frowned from his comment, wishing there was more you could do for him. “I’m sorry to hear. If it makes you feel any better, I plan on staying overnight at the hospital. I was able to get work off.”

His eyes softened and you couldn’t help the smile that grew on your lips. “I love you, you know. I’d never leave you when you’re struggling,” Hawks glances down at the phone, typing a quick message before letting it play. Your laughter fills the air before you shake your head, “and even if you’re not struggling.”

Times like these sucked, but Hawks was glad that you were here to help him.

Throughout the day, Hawks slept like a log from his exhausted and medicated state. Thankfully, the doctors had informed you that he was healing exceptionally well and even if it took some time, his wings were bound to grow back.

The nurses would occasionally come in to check on Hawks and change any bandages as they needed to, making sure he was healing at his potential.

It was past 11 at night when you had woken up from a late nap. You had moved the long sofa from the window over beside Hawks’ bed to be closer to him at night.

Sitting up, you decided to check up on Hawks, who was still sleeping. Pushing the sofa back enough to stand between the sofa and the bed, you hovered over Hawks, brushing his messy bangs back slightly. He looked so much more peaceful asleep.

And thankfully, he was doing just fine. Letting out a relieved sigh, you shut your tired eyes before placing your hand on his, but suddenly, your quirk activated itself.

You found yourself falling into the dark abyss. Your surroundings began to take shape and it wasn’t long before you found yourself in an unfamiliar place.

Glancing around, you observed the soft clouds that drifted along the bright blue sky. You could see what seemed to be the main town in the distance, filled with tall and large buildings alike.

“Keigo!”

Hearing a sudden shout, you quickly turned around to find an old rundown shack that laid out in the middle of nowhere. “Who’s Keigo?” you thought to yourself as you quickly glanced around before making your way to the shack.

Peeking through the worn out doorway, your eyes glanced around at the torn up shack and how mangled up the place was. It seemed as if someone was living in this shack.

You caught a glimpse of the woman who sat on the floor silently, but the tense man had caught your attention.

The rugged looking man seemed to be fuming with anger. It wasn’t until he kicked the small child that sent you shooting towards him, “Hey! Leave them alone!” you cried as you tried to push the man away, only to phase through him and onto the ground.

Turning around, your eyes were met with familiar red wings, but this time smaller. As the man walked away, the child leaned over to grab the Endeavor doll that had gone flying from the impact of the kick.

“An Endeavor doll?” you questioned, glancing up to take a look at the young boy. That’s when it all clicked, “Hawks?”

Suddenly, the black abyss opened back up above you. The scene began breaking and shooting up before you too went flying up into the emptiness.

Your quirk was fading—you were waking up.

Gasping awake, your breathing was heavy and labored as your eyes quickly scanned the area before they landed on Hawks, this time from the present. His hands gripped your forearms tightly as a worried expression crossed his face.

Gently, his hands slid up until they landed on your cheeks, holding your face in his hands as you began to sob uncontrollably. Everything you had just seen and heard was too much for you to handle.

His thumbs caressed your cheeks in efforts to comfort your shaken form.

You didn’t know why your emotions seemed to burst out of you, but you had an idea it was because of how you had seen a glimpse Hawks’ past—something he had kept a secret from you.

“Hawks,” you choked, staring into his gold orbs, “m-my quirk activated when I touched you, but it sent me to the past instead, your past.” His hands faltered slightly against your cheeks. Reaching up, you placed your hands on what you could manage on his cheeks before whispering,

“Keigo, that’s your real name, isn’t it?”

Hawks�� eyes widened as he pulled away from you, shaken from hearing his name come from your lips. Dragging your hands down, you slip your smaller ones into his, giving him a comforting squeeze.

“I got a glimpse of your past. I saw that little shack you lived in. I think those adults in the room were your parents. He was calling you ‘Keigo,’ and you were just a little boy.”

Hawks shut his eyes with furrowed brows as you recalled what you had seen. If he was honest, this wasn’t how he wanted you to find out, especially when he was roughed up and stuck in the hospital.

But he was also relieved to have it off his chest—fate must’ve played a role in this.

Guilt slowly began to eat at you as Hawks sat quietly on his hospital bed, not paying you any attention as he hung his head low. Was it a mistake telling him about his past?

“I’m sorry,” you start awkwardly, “it wasn’t my place to say all of this. Um, I’m just going to step out for a few minutes. I didn’t mean to-” Before you could say or get any further, Hawks tightened his grip on your hands, keeping you in place. “Hawks?”

Releasing your hands, he made a gesture to your phone before you leaned over to grab the device for him. You sat in anticipation as you watched him type away before the robotic voice filled the room.

“I didn’t want you finding out like this,” You could only manage a sad smile, his fingers typing away once more. “Once I heal and once my voice is back, I promise I’ll tell you everything.”

“You don’t have to if you’re not ready,” you try, but Hawks shook his head, “I can’t keep hiding this from you.”

With a shaky breath, you nod. Hawks was set on his decision and you would go to him with an open heart and with open arms. He trusts you and you trust him back.

Lying back down on the sofa that sat beside his bed, you reached over his hand once more before making yourself comfortable, “For now, let’s go to sleep. You need to rest, my sweet bird. I love you, have a good night.” you say.

Closing your eyes, you could only hear Hawks getting himself comfortable in his bed before a few taps were heard.

“Good night, I love you too, chickadee.”

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showrunnerihardlyknowher · 3 years

Note

Idk about you but that trope where a giant gets angry and accidentally scares a tiny and feels bad abt it afterwards makes me go absolutely feral,,

So, originally, I was planning for this scene to be in a future chapter of This Is Nothing Like The Disney Star Wars Trilogy, but I could never really think of a full story arc around it, even though I still really really really love this idea. In any case, if I happen to brainstorm a better plot and find a way to squeeze this in I might edit it into the main story, otherwise enjoy some classic Giant Catboi and Twink Solider fearplay >:3c

“Do you have any idea how dangerous that was!?”

As expected, the little one did not respond to his rhetorical question, though his tone certainly helped snap it out of its previous stupor as it released its death grip on his shirt in favor of squirming as soon as the bedroom door slid shut behind him. His aggravation at the situation was clear as day even without the usual language and cultural barrier that impeded any sort of deeper relationship Edix tried to form with the human. Red ears were still folded back against his curls and his shoulders tense, the stiff posture traveling down to his hands were they gripped the earthling to his chest perhaps just a touch more tightly than usual, not that it prevented it from trying to push and wriggle itself out of his overprotective hold.

Fuck no, he wasn’t ready to let it go yet, not when flecks of blood were still smeared against his knuckles as a result of an impromptu rescue mission. The satisfying snap of cartilage under his fist after one good sucker punch to Talan’s smug face still echoed in his mind, blood gushing from the surely broken nose while the biologist stumbled backwards into the shelves. Edix wondered if he would be reprimanded for that by the directors later, or if Talan would be too proud to report the ass kicking, maybe even taking the lesson to heart to not fuck with his things in the future. And yes, that included trying to vivisect his sweet little pet.

How was I supposed to know the stray belonged to you? He had asked with sarcastic innocence, as if the human in question hadn’t been seen with Edix a thousand times before, and wasn’t drenched in his scent, and didn’t have his ID code printed on the back of its little suit, Maybe if you weren’t such a wuss and actually put it on a shorter leash-

Asshole. He was lucky Edix’s only goal at the moment was to get the little one off the table and back to the appropriate sector rather than rip Talan to shreds with his own tools. A taste of his own medicine, perhaps. Still, he admittedly did have a point about the human, what with how much it would run off and get lost and damn near killed. He simply couldn’t figure out what was so terrible about staying in his company that the little one would risk injury and mutilation in a foreign environment as opposed to the safety and comfort he so desperately tried to provide for it. They might have had a bit of a rocky start, sure, but stars above that was far in the past now. There’s nothing either of them can do to change the facts so why not accept things as they are and make some type of effort to be happy in this new life? By all accounts, Edix was a great owner!

And yet, the little one still fought him every step of the way. Even now, having just saved it from a fate of having its tiny organs sliced while it was wide awake, it made it known it did not want to be near him anymore. It might have been clinging to him the entire walk back to the bedroom, but it must have remembered it was supposed to be oblivious to the notion of genuine love and safety because now it started to stutter out little squeaks on top of struggling. Normally, Edix adored any and all of the sounds it made, especially when it was directly trying to talk to him which only served to give him the mental image of a pup mindlessly babbling before they managed their first few words. This time, however, it only worsened his irritation.

“Stop.” He ordered, which the human somewhat complied with, though it probably had more to do with his harsher tone and the fact that he was already lowering his hand towards the bed to set it down. As soon as it was free of his hold, it scrambled back, looking at him with those wide brown eyes that were full of so much fear it made him sick. Why did it have to be so afraid of him? What could he have possibly done that even now, almost a cycle later, it was still overtly wary of his intentions. All he ever did was care for it. Feed it, pet it, cuddle it, protect it, and still nothing was good enough!

With a tired sigh, he rubbed his hand down his face and resisted the urge to tug at his hair. “I just don’t understand,” he pleaded, begging some cosmic being out there to suddenly grant the little one the power to understand what he was saying, “what can I possibly do to prove to you that I’m not going to hurt you? I’m trying to keep you alive and it’s like...I don’t know, you resent me for that or something!”

The sweet thing looked more confused at his words than anything, but he could tell his body language and voice were making it uneasy. The human was used to soft words and purrs and slow movements, rarely any agitation in his being. After a beat of silence marked by an intense stare down, Edix gave up on hoping the earthling would miraculously explain itself and open up to sharing its thoughts on the matter. He reached for it and it instinctively back up, flinching when a growl rumbled in his throat in response.

“Stop running,” it was a fruitless endeavor, but like hell if he wouldn’t stop trying. That was how new pups learned how to understand a language anyways, wasn’t it? To repeat certain words over and over until they got the idea? Maybe that’s all he needed to do here, maybe by now it already knew the Venandi words for no, stop, be good, and so on. He reached for it again and it did the same thing as last time, always sure to stay just out of the most convenient reach. Not that it mattered how much it inched away seeing how it was trapped on the bed with Edix directly in front of it, but it was the principal of the matter.

And it was then that something inside him snapped. Something primal as a result of dealing with an unruly pup far too long for his nerves to handle at this moment. He wasn’t even aware of his actions, belatedly realizing how he pounced on the bed in a flash, the human scrambling to get away but only having enough time to turn around before being roughly pinned on its stomach against the mattress. His teeth were bared and pressed tightly against its back, fangs scraping against the layers of its clothes to no doubt bruise the tender flesh underneath, though thankfully they didn’t break the skin. A loud growl reverberated though its entire body, shaking it to its core.

“Enough.” He hissed against its back, keeping his teeth pressed into its skinny frame for a moment longer before pulling away. The second he did, his glare softened, all the anger he felt gone in an instant as soon as he saw the sight underneath him.

The poor thing was absolutely petrified.

It was probably the worst it’s ever been scared, arguably. Not even the first time they met, when it had so gracefully tumbled down that hill and landed face first in front of him, compared to the level of fear that radiated off it. A split-second thought had Edix wondering if he had legitimately scared it to death. Soon enough, though, he was able to pick up the minute tremors that shook through it, almost like an aftershock of the warning that it felt more than heard. It was pale, baby face devoid of color not unlike that time before when it had been sick with fever. But its eyes...those sweet little doe eyes he loved so much were wide and wet with a sheen of tears that refused to fall, locked in a blank stare straight ahead towards the wall and refusing to look at him.

A small, choked hiccup made its body twitch every couple of breaths, but it refused to open its mouth to allow any of these sniffles to turn into cries. Shit, it refused to move at all, too terrified of Edix’s threat display that if it did anything he didn’t like there would be dire consequences to pay. He supposed it worked exactly as intended, in that case. It was still, it was quiet, it was technically obeying him after he just forced it to behave via alternative punishment. That didn’t change the fact that he felt absolutely, terribly, extremely awful about what he just did.

It was just a pup, as he always said, regardless of what Ylva would tell him about human adolescence and such. It didn’t know any better, it had never been raised in these situations before and needed much longer than a measly cycle to unlearn all of its prey behaviors it needed to survive on its home planet. Besides, it wasn’t that it didn’t fully know that it was perfectly safe with Edix, it was smart enough to know he was at the very least the safest option when presented with any other Venandi. Edix had been upset, and it knew he was upset, so of course it would want to avoid a potentially hostile predator before-

--before it snatched the little one in its teeth.

Fuck, fuck, he was an idiot. Maybe he wasn’t as cut out for this as he thought, not like Ylva who was the very essence of motherhood. No. Now wasn’t the time for self doubts and pity, not when the human was in such a state. Slowly, hands cupped around its shaking form, mindful to make sure his fingers were in its view so it wouldn’t be any more startled when he lifted it up, not that he was completely sure it was actually seeing anything in front of it. The little one hardly reacted to the movement, laying limp when he pressed it against his chest and moved to sit up against the headboard of the bed in a similar fashion to what he had done the first night the poor thing was on the ship.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, it’s okay,” he whispered to it, rubbing his thumb along the curve of its back just how it liked whenever it dozed, “you’re okay, we’re fine, it’s okay to cry. I’m sorry I scared you, I’m so sorry.”

Normally in these types of instances, he’d be purring and shushing the little sweetheart until he was able to get it down for a nap, but he had little confidence that any other types of chest vibrations would have its usual effect of making the human drowsy currently. When it finally started blinking again, the tears that had welled up ran freely down its cheeks, quickly biting down on its wobbling lip to prevent any sobs from escaping and get it in trouble for misbehaving. He softly clicked his tongue at it and cooed, anything to put it at ease with a softer demeanor. “I know, honey, I know. I won’t ever do that again, I promise."

Well, if nothing else, at least the little one’s apprehension of him wasn’t unfounded anymore, much to his dismay.

#g/t #fearplay #g/t writing #g/t fearplay #giant/tiny #macro/micro #my writing #ask #anon #g/t ocs #all i can say is :3c #also i didnt skip math class i skipped english class instead hsjfhdfjhfjjsf

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the--descension · 3 years

Note

i would die for a "how to use html and css to format ao3" lesson from you 👀 no pressure but i'm genuinely in awe :)

Hello! So sorry it’s taken me ages to get to this.

It's no pressure at all! I have tried to cover the basics of HTML/CSS on AO3 here, and instead of writing very extensively about the syntax which is very Google-able, I have tried to include little tips and tricks that have come in handy for me.

This, by no means, is a complete guide but I hope it can get you started with HTML and CSS on AO3!

It got pretty long, so the answer’s below the cut.

Okay, so let’s start at the very beginning, shall we?

What is HTML and CSS?

Well, HTML is Hyper Text Markup Language and CSS is Cascading Style Sheets.

But that is something that probably doesn’t help a lot, so to put it very simply, HTML provides the structure of a webpage while CSS does the styling, that is, fixing how and where the elements should exist, how to shape them, how to space them, all so that the webpage looks great.

Something to keep in mind is that all web pages can run only on HTML but the end result is not going to be something that’s nice to look at. In fact, without CSS, the page might not even make a lot of sense. Here, take a look at Tumblr itself with all CSS disabled (there’s a very useful extension called Web Developer that allows you to do this):

Not very nice to look at, but all the elements of the page are here only with the help of HTML.

And look, this is what the above section looks like with CSS enabled:

This was just a brief visual walkthrough to show what HTML and CSS really do, but let’s move on to HTML and CSS in the world of AO3.

Where does the HTML and CSS go on AO3?

The HTML part of the code is put into the text box when you post a new story/new chapter. You must have noticed the two options — Rich Text and HTML — and it’s important to have HTML selected for AO3 to identify the HTML tags that you’ll be using.

All your content goes into this textbox. Whatever text you may be writing, whatever images you may be hosting, whatever links you might want to add— everything goes here.

Now, for styling all the content that you’ve put into the textbox, you need CSS, and that happens through work skins. It’s super simple, and all you have to do is go to Skins on your AO3 panel and then to My Work Skins, and then create a new work skin where you can dump all of your CSS code.

Okay, so onward we go.

How to HTML and CSS?

I’m no expert in web design and my knowledge mostly comes from Coursera, one summer internship, one class in college, and extensive online searching. And, I’ll tell you this, the most I have learnt is from extensive online searching.

Because at the very heart of it, web design is not so much about understanding and applying concepts (as with other coding languages) but more about visualizing elements and testing them out. I must add that this is completely my opinion as a person who rather enjoys data structures and algorithms as compared to web dev, and I’m certain that seasoned web developers will disagree with my views here.

Right, so the online searching. The best in the business when it comes to explaining HTML/CSS is www.w3schools.com. They have sample code, short and sweet explanations, and an online IDE to test your code. Really, it’s a win-win situation.

Alrighty, so now you know where to look for your HTML tags and CSS properties but how do you figure out which ones to use?

HTML Tags

I’ll talk about the HTML that’s required for coding on AO3 exclusively.

But before that— every HTML document has two main parts: the <head> and the <body>. But here on AO3, we only code the <body> which, as its name suggests, holds the content that’s going to appear on the browser. The <head> part is not required for AO3 work skins at all.

Okay, so how to code HTML on AO3? Well, your best friends are going to be the container tags such as <div> and <span>, and the paragraph tag <p>. What these tags do is they create areas on your browser — you can imagine them as small rectangles and squares — where you can put in your content via HTML, and then later style using CSS.

See this? The entire shaded area belongs to a <div> which is styled by a CSS class called “tumblr” (to keep things simple, we’ll only focus on CSS classes, and not id’s. It won’t really hamper developing a workskin in any way.)

This above belongs to a <p> that is styled by a CSS class “tumblrbody”. And, this <p> exists within the <div> mentioned above.

Here’s a <span> styled using the CSS class “tumblrtags”, which comes within the <div> and <p> we just discussed.

Basically, the idea is that the entire page will have to be divided into all these subsections, nested within each other if required, so that they can then be styled using CSS.

Other HTML tags that come in handy are the <a> and <img> tags.

The <a> or anchor tag is used to embed links. Want your reader to be led to a separate page while they’re reading your story? This is it. (This one’s quite common, and authors use them quite frequently in their notes to link to their Twitter/Tumblr etc.)

The <img> tag is used to embed images as the name suggests.

See how the picture is within an <img> tag styled by a CSS class “tumblrimg”?

Again, I’m not talking about the syntax of these tags or how they have to be written because that’s something which can very easily be found on w3schools or any other web dev tutorial website.

So, that’s pretty much about HTML. Now, CSS.

CSS Properties

So, when I talk about how most of my web dev happens through thorough internet searching, I’m mostly talking about CSS. Because HTML tags aren’t difficult to remember, they stay in memory when you keep designing web pages, but CSS properties... ugh.

But before we begin, a short note on CSS classes. To simplify matters you can look at them as labels given to your HTML container tags (<div> for example). Once you assign the label to your HTML element, you can then style that label in your CSS, and introduce properties to it which you want to see in your HTML. It basically forms the link between your HTML and CSS.

Say, I have a <div> that I want to style, then I’ll give it a label like this: <div class=”mongoosesurprise”>Your code</div>. The class name is mongoosesurprise, and when I have to style that particular <div>, I’ll have CSS code that looks like this:

Now, about CSS properties.

You see all the words in white followed by a colon? max-width? border? background-image? That’s it— CSS properties. I can never remember if it is maxwidth or max-width, whether it’s margin-right or right-margin, whether it’s padding-right or right-padding, and that’s where the Googling comes in.

Again, like with HTML, I’ll only talk about CSS on AO3. Unlike regular CSS, CSS here always has to start with #workskin. And then, #workskin can be followed by our class name. (The class name must be preceded by a fullstop though, like in the picture above.)

My CSS design procedure is all over the place. I entirely work on the basis of trial and error. I keep adjusting properties like max-width and padding and margin to see how the elements fit best. (It doesn’t take me as long as it did four-five years ago to estimate these values and I’d attribute that to practice and inspecting a lot of web pages. On a related note, it’s great to learn web design by inspecting other pages.)

I realize this isn’t great advice but like I said, it’s always been about trial and error when it comes to CSS. What I can say conclusively is that with properties width, height, display, position, padding, and margin most of your HTML tags will be placed properly. But when it comes to styling, the list is really quite endless. From a number of font-related properties to border, there’s a lot— and, thus, Google.

And, finally, what you must know for HTML/CSS on AO3 is how to host images.

Hosting Images

If you want your work to contain images, it’s best to host them somewhere online. Imgur is a great option; it’s free and really simple to use. Once the image is uploaded, you can get the share links and put it in your HTML <img> tag (under the src attribute— again, very syntactical so I’m not getting into that), or if you want you can put it in your CSS as an attribute for the property “background-image” (like in the code above).

You’ll have to make minor changes to the share link though, that is, add the image extension (.png or .jpg) to the end of the link. Also, sometimes the image doesn’t render if there’s no ‘i’ preceding ‘imgur.com’. Here’s a sample link that works perfectly: http://i.imgur.com/aSMSztl.png.

And, I think that’s pretty much it.

This covers the absolute basics of how to code HTML/CSS on AO3. But I’d like to repeat that by no means is this everything. If there’s a particular area you’d want me to explain, please feel to drop in an ask!

Happy coding!

#antarcticasx #html/css #ao3 #workskins #i'll tag this as #zutara #in case anyone else reading 'it would have been you' wants to know

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tazanna-blythe · 3 years

Text

Done

Chapter 5

~Tom & Sabine Boulangerie Patisserie~

"Wellcome ladies so how's school?" Sabine said with a motherly smile smile then placing a freshly baked Croissants on the table.

"Where fine, just another day at the clown house, I swear that our classmates have no brain cells not one of them "Chloe said while spreading butter on her croissant then without any hesitation she ate it.

"I beg to differ dear but i think they still have one connecting brain cell,seeing as they are one and no one can break their bond"Mari and she also ate the croissant happily

"So Dumb,Dumber,Dumbest then? or all equally dumb?" Chloe mumble (she took another bite on her food)

"No it's like they all have an on and off button for their reasoning and common sense and Liela has the button" Mari

"And She uses her sausage her as an antenna the give them signals hahahahahahahhaha"Chloe

"Ladies that's not nice besides everyone has their own preference or style that they think is fashionable ... all though i wanna know who told her having a sausage as an inspiration for a hairstyle especially when she moves her head she looks like a paddle ball a had when i was a kid" Sabine

both Chloe and Marinette bust into laughter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Collège Françoise Dupont Clinic

*Bell *

Adrien is still sleeping soundly and the kind nurse doesn't want to wake him up and clearly from how pale his face is and how dark his eye bags are and how bone to skin he is, she made a decision to call his guardians to pick him up and have him take a proper rest and some good soul food too judging by how boney he is. this child is a model she understands this but this is to much and it has a medical term called MALNUTRITION so she's not gonna stand by and do nothing.

So she quietly and gentle as she can took photos and notes on Adrien body. because he is wearing a plain white T-shirt and a loose pants all she has to do is hold some of the cloth of the T-shirt to make it tight to show how small and boney he is and she all so did the same thing to the pants. His wearing a T-shirt so his some of is upper arm is shone so the nurse took a measuring tape and measure his arms and leg. And lastly because of the akuma attacks the School funds for the clinic doubled and because of this most of their equipments are brand new and the latest model so the bed has a scale built in it so she took his weight and height. and all of this is recorded in the clinic's CCTV camera she made sure of it.

After all that is done she neatly filed this info on her computer and flash drive then she called his guardians. fortunately for him his father and his assistant is so busy that they cannot answer their phone so it was Gorilla who was called to pick him up.

When Gorilla arrived the nurse was so scared of him she almost scream in fear when he suddenly appeared in front of her luckily she didn't.

"Hello Sir. how can i help you" Nurse

"Hi my name is SImon and I'm here to pick up Adrien" Gorilla (HIS NAME IS SIMON OH MY GOSH I JUST FOUND OUT TODAY!!!)

"Hi my name is Katty and I'm the school nurse nice to meet you"

"Likewise"

"Im sorry but before I hand over Adrien to you i need to see your IDs please"

"Sure"

"Ok it seems that everything is in order then you may take him home, and also my advice is to keep him stress free, eat and sleep more cause we don't want him to suddenly collapse now do we"

"Yes ma'am"

Then Gorilla slowly and Gently picked up Adrien like a porcelain princess and took his backpack/sling bag and went home.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Collège Françoise Dupont Gym

"Ok class since Adrien is sick we need to still proceed to class. Now, I want all of you to make two lines.One for boys and one for the girls CHOP ChOP!!! " Gym teacher

“Um Sir. What about lila??” Rose

“What about her?“

“Lila Sprained her risk and ankle so she cant stand very long“ Alya

“Ok then Who’s Lila, Raise your good arm“

“Sir. I’m Lila Rossi“ Liela replied with a small smile and leaning into her left foot for effect

The Teacher saw her and slowly walk towards her while inspecting her body for injuries

“Which foot is sprained and which arm?“

“My right foot and arm sir “Liela said weakly.

“Can i check your arm and foot?“ The Teacher ask nicely

“Yes of course“

So someone brought a chair for her to sit while the Gym Teacher inspect her injuries

“Awww, Aw aw aw awaaa that hurts“ Liela cries dramatically like a spoiled dog. While the Teacher was just holding her arm not doing anything other than carrying it like a sausage

“Ok then Lila where's your medical note seeing as this is a “BIG INJURY” your parents shouldn't have let you go to school?“ The Teacher looking and talking to her like a person would to a two year old

“My Dad left us since i was young and my Mom is so busy that she’d forgotten about me“ Liela said sadly trying to make her tears drop not realizing that the teacher don't buy it

“Hush now don't cry dear I’m sure your mom is just tired now why don't you sit here and be quiet while all of us start the class,O.K“

“Yes sir“ with a final fake sob she smile at the Teacher.

“Ok,now two lines people, great now everybody just jog 20 laps then you are dismissed.But remember do not break your line and JOG NOT RUN OK ALIX AND KIM! if i see any of you break your line or run i’ll make everyone do 15 jumping jacks then additional 10 laps. Am I Clear! “

“Yes,Sir!!“ the Students then do as they were told while lila stayed seated smiling at her small victory and proceeds play on her phone and to search for more things to lie to make her even more popular.

While everybody was busy doing their task no one noticed the Gym Teacher also take’s his phone and contacted the School Nurse asking for Lila’s medical records and telling her what happen today.

Faking an injury to a teacher who was an athlete himself was a big No No but he cant just outed the child right then and there because she’ll get emotional and he doesn't want to cause another akuma.He’ll just do it the old fashion way... Making the parents discipline their own child. but first he needed her records.

“Did you just see what i just witness?“ Chloe while looking at her exhausted classmates after they finished 20 laps.

“What?“ Mari while handling her a bottle of cold water

“You really didn’t see that?,Thanks“

“You mean Liela’s ridiculous lie then yeah and so?“

“So? So?, Mari she just gotten away with it and it wasn’t even a good lie and acting“

“No, I don’t think she did“

“Huh?! Would her majesty care to explain?“

“Our gym Teacher is an Athlete who won medals in his time. He out of everyone here would have known just by looking at someone if they have any physical injuries“

“So he just let her go?“

“No. I don't think he would so let's just watch and see what he'll do, besides if he really fell for it then his just another idiot who needs to be replaced” Marinette said as she and Chloe backed their bags and left.

~~~~~~~~

“Hey Nino do you have any info about Adrien??“ Alix

“Yeah Nino what happen to him?, you were the last person we saw with him?“ Alya

“Well he looked sick so i send him to the clinic, I didn't know that he was that sick“ Nino

“Well I Just hope he gets better“ Alix

“So has anyone gotten started researching yet??“Alya

“Nope we were just hoping that will do it together like in a slumber party?“ Rose

“Actually that’s not bad soo who's house are we going?“Juleka

“What are you guys talking about? and where are we going?“ Liela walked to them when she saw her minions talking without her and of course she was escorted by the ever loyal dog Kim

“I umm“ Juleka

“Yeah where are we going?“ Kim

Everyone was looking at each other knowing that they can fool kim but not Lila.

“Well-“ Alya

“We were planning on a slumber party tonight but we haven't decided where will be staying?“Juleka

“Oh!! why don't we stay at my place my parents arent how so i have are house all to myself and you guys don't have to bring anything with you because and my parents just went to the supermarket yesterday“ Rose

“Really that's great so it's settled will head home pack then will go directly to Rose’s house“ Alya

“Great I can't wait to spend time with my very BEST FRIENDS! but aren't we gonna invite Marinette and Chloe?“ Liela

“No need they’ll just destroy and ruined the party. So what are we waiting for let GOOOOOO!!!“ Alya

After that everyone started packing their bags and left to their respective homes with a smile on their faces.

***************

It's been so long since I Uploaded something and i hope you guys liked it.... If you guys have any suggestion i’ll be happy to read and maybe include them in my next work.

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#ml au #ml fic #ml salt #Marinette deserves better #lila salt #ml class salt #Done Chapter 5 #miraculous lady bug salt #marinette x damian

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pinkchanelbag · 3 years

Text

— there’s no one else; chapter three.

a jean kirstein x reader mafia au.

last | masterlist | next

series summary: a boy caught in a web with his survival depending on balancing niceties between his predators. a prim girl on thin ice that leads down the path of least resistance. no one too close and no one too far, no allegiance unquestioned, and no child whose value and future goes without evaluation like a playing card that determines their worth. to be destined for big things is more like being doomed to them, but that’s the way it goes. it’s just family matter.

chapter summary: the party continues.

wc: 3.8k.

cw: does pain count? idk i was listening to as the world caves in while editing this so </3.

note: that shit hurted is all i gotta say lmao this is hella long cause things are picking up so id say from now on expect hella expositional/full chapters? enjoy lol.

prioritize.

your eyes protest as you will them to return to porco’s face that hovers somewhere above your shoulder. one thing at a time. you can’t make yourself listen to sense for just a few seconds. it strikes an ice cold terror in your ribcage. listen to me, you want to tell your body and mind as they look where they want and paint any facial expression on your face that they please. listen to me.

the moment passes. the damage is minimal with porco hurrying into his seat and the venue bursting into another light applause. applause for jean. and again your eyes look nowhere searching for you have no idea what, and again you force them back in front of you—but not before getting an eyeful of where the guests’ claps are turned to, and the faintest sighting of a champagne-carrying hand rising in the air in some place across the rectangle. but it’s all you can see.

“how was the meeting?” you spit the words out before they run off your tongue. porco gives you a smile and reaches for your hand, squeezing it lightly as if to say, not now. you simply smile back, yours saying, right, my bad.

and onto the next thing.

jean is here. no—before that, something else to address. jean. jean, jean, jean, jean. how long has it been since you thought that name, spoke it in your mind? jean. jean. it bounces around in your head as you re-accustom yourself to it. jean-boy. calm smile. ash brown hair. dark brows, narrowed eyes, sharp jaw. you reconstruct him in your mind to fathom his presence in this very place.

jean who was whisked away to start his career at the ripe age of fourteen. jean who raked in apprenticeships, scholarships, and early admittances. jean, who disappeared in a tornado of books so many years ago.

and then more applause, but quite louder this time, a signal that the speech came to a close while you were in your head. porco releases your hand to clap politely, but his gaze is ice cold when it rests on bertholdt.

“is the old woman allowed to speak?” chirps karina, and a pleasant chuckle ripples through the tables. she holds up her glass and exhales, waiting a beat or two before talking, almost as if lost in thought.

“i suppose every time i think i’ve gotten old enough that i won’t have to worry about major life changes, i’m given what’s coming for me,” she laughs. “new endeavours, many new endeavours, thanks to my diligent family. important friendships, including the return of the kirstein family after tom kirstein, may he rest in peace. bringing together two allied families as we are…and mexico! who would’ve thought…” she fades off fondly for a moment. her tone, her gaze, are not those of a speech-giver, but of exactly what she is: an elderly woman reminiscing and reflecting with wistful surprise. “many new friends. and family too. new family, new love—“ she turns her gaze to the galliard table. your heart freezes momentarily before you slip a soft smile on your face. it’s only for a moment, but you and porco hold the party’s attention. “—a beautiful union. it’s good to move forward, and to remember how life is all about change. i forget sometimes, but i cherish change. it makes me feel young.

“still… i’ll never stop missing those who aren’t with us. i carry them in my heart no matter what happens around me…yes…there are many people i wish i could’ve shared this day with. and since his anniversary approaches, tonight i feel at the front of my heart, my godson, marcel…”

and porco’s face closes up like a clam. your ears abandon the rest of the speech, instead brushing your fingers over porco’s knuckles, watching his face with a soft gaze. the same bitter fire there always is when his older brother is mentioned, but you notice something else just now. some energy. some spark, intention. your heart stutters. could that have been what the meeting entailed?

if you thought the party was making you nervous before, your mind now spirals as you force yourself to nibble at your steak dinner. did braun-galliard learn something about marcel’s death? more particularly, something that could plant hope in porco’s fury? the only thing that could do that, as anyone with ears and eyes knows, is to catch the killer.

did someone find new leads?

the question makes it difficult to swallow your food, and the dread of not knowing, not understanding, but feeling something coming, crawls into your stomach.

what’s going on over there, historia?

you silence your paranoid mind. it was just one look. one glint in his eyes. you watch him carefully throughout the meal, but you know, you know you’re not imagining it. the hard line of his mouth and the way he bites at the inside of his cheek gives away his restlessness and…grudge. it’s the only way to describe it, and you’ve been around the man long enough to know as everyone knows: porco galliard never lets go of a grudge. a good man, a kind one, but his anger is something any sane person avoids. and so you can’t ignore your intuition. not when he looks like he looks like he’s lost in thought about something rooted deep in the past or, perhaps, reaching far into the future.

your unique position allows you to know enough about the personal lives of important people, and this is how you draw the conclusion that something isn’t right.

braun-galliard’s deep grudge for reiss is perfectly understandable. in all accounts, reiss was at fault. it is one thing to be associated with the murderer of a major family figure. it is another thing entirely to assist that murderer into hiding and refuse to reveal them, particularly when the murderer holds no business-strategic value. it was illogical and rivalrous, and few people could understand the reason behind such actions—those few including yourself.

hisoria’s actions all those years ago created an irreversible rift between the two families. the consequences have followed the reiss family into the present day where an enemy family is assimilating all its businesses, properties, and contacts. in many ways, historia doomed her family. that’s how much it meant to her to keep the murder unresolved.

so why? why would she allow new evidence to surface now, after so long and so much effort, and at the worst of times? and well, the answer is simple; she wouldn’t. you know she wouldn’t. historia would flip the world on its head if it meant protecting the killer. which can only mean one thing.

historia has lost control, and ymir fritz has made herself known again.

why she has is where you hit your wit’s end. but there is a reason, and you’re sure that someone as cunning as she has a perfectly good reason. you pinch the tablecloth between your fingers and consider the fragile balance of the family powers, and how this one woman could blow up life as you all know it.

porco’s deep chuckle as he talks to pieck pulls you back into the real world. you blink away the thoughts, no longer because they might be ridiculous or paranoid, but because you don’t have the means to do anything about it yet. you pray that it’s your imagination running away from you. you pray that there are no more complications in this life. as you watch porco’s rough hands saw at a piece of steak with his knife, you let out a silent, imperceptible scoff. all from one look. fragile indeed. but you can’t think about this anymore, and so you don’t.

and then there’s the other thing. and you can’t seem to understand why it fills you with equal parts dread and excitement.

once the main course has been finished, the guests are encouraged by the catering staff to get up, mingle, walk around, and socialize awhile before the cake and desserts are brought out. finally, you’re able to finish at least one thing you’ve been meaning to do since the beginning of the night.

“really, she’s so beautiful, porco,” karina coos, patting your jaw gently. your cheeks burn with delight. porco hums his reply, a hand on the small of your back as you bow every so slightly to the woman before you. you smile to her, then to him, and once you’ve made the smallest of talk with the godmother, you’re stepping backwards and onto somewhere else. you don’t feel relief at the complete task, which you’ve been dreading for days now. but then, you never feel much relief when finishing an obligation. you suppose you just look for the next thing you’re meant to do.

as soon as you’ve returned to your table, porco tells you, “i have a lotta people to talk to.” you nod in understanding, and he squeezes your arm in thanks before weaving through the tables. a shiver runs down the skin where his hand was. you should’ve brought a jacket.

when you turn back to the table in hopes of once more following pieck around like a lost puppy, she’s already long gone. you mutter a curse under your breath, unsure of where to go. your feet seem to stutter in your heels as they try to decide whether to go away from or towards where you saw the raised champagne glass some time ago.

away, you tell yourself. it would be dreadfully awkward. the excitement is just a product of your kiddish disposition. everything has changed. you’re not the you that you were, and jean is a man. your shoulders sag in disappointment at the thought that he might not be—isn’t—the boy you remember. away, you think as you start trudging across the clearing of tables. away, but your body and mind are out of touch.

always you are conscious of the eyes that trace your figure across the floor, as you’ve been taught to be since childhood. you lower your head but meet people’s eyes in a non-threatening show of kindness to give a good impression to your witnesses. the faintest look or mannerism makes the difference between oh, the new young? y/n, was it? she seems like a nice girl, and dunno…bad feeling about her…

you run your hands up and down your cold arms as you arrive to the other side of the tables. the clusters of people standing and talking or shuffling out of their seats or visiting other tables are daunting, but you squeeze your way into them with utterances of excuse me’s and continue through. you realize you’re in a tough spot with no direction and no real motive and sigh at your own meek behavior.

“pardon me…” you murmur robotically. your vision is filled solely with body parts; elbows and hands, shoulders, barrels between you and whatever destination that gets you out of the crowd. and here is the next barrel, someone’s back square in front of you with no way to slip around, instead requiring permission to pass.

your eyes flit around for a moment for another way. the man before you is rather tall, shoulders broad and soft prints of back muscles on his blazer. tilting your head up, you catch sight of soft looking ash brown tufts and

chocolate eyes and sharp jaw and dark brows calm smile—

and your heart surely does stop for a moment before the man in front of you eerily senses a presence at his rear, tipping his face over his shoulder for a moment and oh sorry and how strange that he should have some facial hair sprouting at his chin, and how strange for you to think it’s strange when you haven’t seen him since he was a young boy and of course he has facial hair, of course he grew up—

“y/n…” and the breath of your name from his mouth.

and you’re doing that thing again. you realize that you’re short circuiting, your mind stuttering and shutting down because of him, and you can’t understand why. you can’t understand anything.

“…hi,” you reply. you can’t help but notice the way you sound so much like a child.

he’s turned around now, and he looks so different from how you envisioned jean as a man would look like. yet another strange thing, that you did think about what he’d look like as a man—when? when did you?—and your mind clung, and clings still, to that image, unable to reconcile the man you believed and the man you see. you look at the man before you and you don’t—can’t—see jean.

as if leaving a vortex, the presence of bodies jumps to the front of your mind. for a moment, the loss of composure and numb confidence takes your breath away. the man before you seems to sense it too, as he turns back to the men he was holding a conversation with, begging their pardon. your eyes fly around in search of a way through, but just as soon, he’s turning back, this time with his hand outstretched as if to gesture, to lead you somewhere else. you stare at the hand for a long moment and then blankly shuffle through the people in his direction.

finally, you’re out of the thicket and on a path leading into the clearing. people come in and out, away from or towards the main space, but very few linger on the wide path. the man guides you to the edge of it near a grove of light-adorned trees.

you dread to look at him, but somehow desperately want to at the same time. like a violent car wreck on the side of the road. morbid curiosity. but you can’t understand why seeing a childhood friend should feel so morbid.

you do it anyway, especially since his eyes now bore into every part of you. you hardly have the room in your mind to be self conscious when you’re doing the same to him. the longer you look, the more you can see him. dark brows darker, thicker. sharp jaw more cut-throat than ever before, dotted with brown stubble, the same color of that hair on his head. hair that brushes over his forehead, but not like when he was young. hair so long he tucks his behind his ears and surely feels it brush along the nape of his neck. his hair is long.

his shoulders are broad. they were the first thing you saw, and they catch your attention once more. he’s filled out more than you could imagine, and he’s taller than before, your head tilts up to look in his face, a face that has a kind soft sort of look on it—of course it does, he’s always been kind. his body is broader, his arms bigger. not just from natural growth. he looks strong. this jean looks like a lion compared to the lean, levelheaded boy you knew. but yes…it’s him. it’s him.

“hey, jean.” your voice isn’t your own. he exhales, and after a second,

“…hi y/n.”

and for a few moments, that’s all. you feel like you’re suspended above water. the feeling of not knowing what to do is foreign, and frightens you.

then he sort of smiles. a raise of his eyebrows and a subtle stretch of his lips.

“you’re all grown up now,” he chuckles, and your insides go off like fireworks and make your skin tingle.

“you’re one to talk,” you reply quickly. you’re talking to his chest, because there’s something overly stimulating about looking at his face. “when’d you shoot up like that?” your words are calm, even somewhat humorous in that girlish anxiety way. get it together.

“had to go through puberty eventually.” his voice sounds so fond in a way that is detached from what he’s saying and relates more to what he’s looking at, and you can’t help but bring your gaze to his. and yes, there’s a slightly affectionate smile adorning his face, his grown face, and it’s really quite lovely. “it’s good to see you, y/n.”

something about it finally calms you. strange, how the feeling of his calm is so familiar even after all these years. you let your lips curl up.

“good to see you too.”

your eyes connect so easily, and you stand together in silence for a few moments and it’s so comfortable you could cry. like collapsing on the couch after a long day. the in and out of your breath is perfectly even, and it syncs with his.

“oh…hey! y/n!” a voice calls your name and cruelly pulls you from the moment. you shift around, hands running up and down your arms to placate the goosebumps, to find porco approaching with some tux-clad man at his side. porco’s hand is in his pocket, an empty glass in the other, which he deposits on a passing servant’s tray as he approaches. “hey, doll.”

you smile at him. he reaches you, the man still at his side but at the distance of a person waiting for their companion to finish a side conversation. porco stands behind you with his hands resting atop yours that still hold your arms. you look over your shoulder to meet his eyes.

“how’s it going?” he asks you quickly before peering at your friend. porco’s face splits into a grin.

“if it isn’t the savior of the hour.” porco pushes his chest to your back in order to come forward and shake jean’s hand. you lean yourself to the side to make way for their interaction, not giving an answer to the question you know porco forgot he asked.

“nice to meet you,” jean smiles charismatically. “heard a lot of great things.”

“likewise,” porco responds. “glad to finally see the kirsteins back to their title. no one did it like your old man, may he rest in peace.”

jean’s eyes sink just a bit, his smiling a little sad when he repeats the mantra. “may he rest in peace.” you feel your heart at your feet, and you can’t look at his face.

“still, i’m glad to have his close second back in business. you’re gonna do a lot of great things, huh? can’t wait to see.”

“absolutely. good to be back. it’s a beautiful family you have here.”

porco seems to remember the woman in his arms who’s leaning awkwardly away from being sandwiched between the two of them. he flashes his smile down at you.

“thank you, thank you,” he tells jean, finally leaning back so that you can stand straight, his hands still on your arms.

“well, you’ve always known the y/l/n’s, right? you and y/n here must go way back.”

jean smiles down at you, and there’s some boyish charm to it. it seems like each upturn of his lips means a different thing to a different person, giving a message that beckons those who watch to watch carefully in hope of their own special smile.

“yeah,” he laughs. “y/n’s mom and mine were pretty close, so i spent a lot of time with this girl before she learned how to do her own makeup.”

again, that giddy, anxious feeling fills your chest.

“hey,” you laugh defensively. your voice sounds small, but not in the way you force it to be when talking to important people. this time, it’s small simply because it’s small.

“aw,” porco’s chest rumbles against you with laughter. “well, she’s an amazing woman.” he looks at you fondly before pressing a kiss to your hair. for some reason, you can’t look anywhere but the ground when you smile in gratitude. jean’s eyes are on you, you know it. “hon, you’re freezing.” porco’s hands leave you for a moment, and you catch him pulling off his blazer. before you can protest, he tosses it onto your shoulders and rubs up and down your arms to warm you. “bring a coat next time, hm?” he tilts his head down to look at you from over your shoulder, and you nod at him with a genuine smile of thanks this time. always a gentleman.

porco makes his goodbyes and apologizes to the man he walked with previously before going on his way. jean still stands before you, but for some reason, the silence is different. you can’t help but feel as if you’ve been caught redhanded. for what, you don’t know.

“congratulations, by the way.” against your better judgment, you look up a him. the content look on his face, that look of fondness, is still there. why does your heart hurt?

“thank you,” you whisper. your fingers come up to pull the blazer around you lest it fall.

“i trust the planning’s going okay? you’re the organized type, so…”

it hits you almost like irritation. how badly you don’t want to be here, with him, having this conversation about this thing that feels so awful to talk about with him. your discomfort comes at you like a truck and makes you almost angry.

“i guess. still a few months, though.” it’s clear to both of you that the easy air has evaporated. finally, finally, you seem to regain your sense of detached cordiality.

“mm. spring wedding?” he asks. you know it’s your imagination, but the way the question is almost mocking makes you want to curse him out and run out of the stupid venue.

“that’s the hope.”

there are more people pouring out of the clearing and into the path, as if to remind you where you are. your eyebrows knit together, and you look sideways at the floor. you know how unapproachable you’re being, but you don’t care. you wish he’d take the hint and leave.

“it’s getting crowded,” jean murmurs, more as an observation to himself. “well…it was good to see you, y/n. unfortunately, i do have a bunch of social duties to deal with. life of the party, huh?” his humorous tone is charming, comfortable. he’s only just come back, but you know he’ll be likeable. he always has been.

all you offer him is a closed-mouth smile. he’s already taking steps backwards into the semi-busy pathway. “not sure when i’ll see you…but hope you’re well. good luck, and uh…all the best,” he says. you meet his eyes just for a second as he goes, and you feel your heart tear. the hand pulling the blazer to you nearly shoots out for him. but it doesn’t, and he melts into the crowd while you remain planted next to the tree grove.

good, you think. go away.

#nia.txt #nia.jean #nia.tne #jean kirstein #jean kirschtein imagine #jean kirschtein x reader #jean kirschtien #jean kirschtein fanfiction #jean kirschtein headcanons #aot #snk #aot x reader #porco galliard x reader #porco galliard

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nightshade-minho · 4 years

Text

-Blue Book- (10)

Act 2

Warnings: angsty shit, future smut.

Wc: 1.8k (sorry for the short ass chapter-)

You blinked sleepily, a finger poking your arm and insistently pulling you out of your slumber.

A whine left your mouth as you opened your eyes slightly, Felix's face hovering over yours.

"Lix-" You groaned, pushing him away and casting a quick glance at the clock on your wall. " It's a Saturday morning, fucking let me sleep." You rolled over, burying your face in the pillow as Felix let out a deep sigh.

"Y/n, this is important. There's something I thought I should let you know-"

"Fuck. Off." You growled, voice muffled by the pillow.

Felix sat there for a moment, contemplating his life choices. Why exactly did he think it would be a good idea to try and wake you up at 8 am on a Saturday?

If he told you the news now, you'd be mad at him for having disturbed your precious sleep. If he tells you when it's too late- god, you'd be pissed beyond doubt.

Either way, he'd have to face your wrath. Deciding he didn't want such a pretty morning to be ruined, he put it off. Was it the right decision? Guess he had to wait and find out.

He cast one last glance at your sleeping face, heart beating. He hoped you’d take it well...he doesn’t want to see you devastated again.

Mentions of him always managed to do exactly that, though.

He really wasn’t prepared for another night of crying and excessive wine drinking, patting your back as you asked the same question, again and again.

He wished he could let you know you were more than enough, worthy of the world. And he’d be sure to protect you.

He wasn’t going to hurt you. Not again.

***

When you finally woke up, courtesy of your alarm, you sat up and slid out of bed. Stumbling out of your room, you headed to the bathroom, which seemed to be locked.

"Lix! Come out, I really need to pee!"

"Just a second!"

You groaned and rested your head against the door, letting your eyes flutter closed again. Felix was definitely a wonderful roommate- you'd gotten lucky in that department- but he always hogged the bathroom, and it infuriated you.

You still remembered the day you met Felix again. You'd moved back to the town after about five years, no longer wanting to live with your mom and her insufferable boyfriend. As soon as you graduated, you took advantage of your newfound independence to go back to where it all began.

Running into Felix had been a pleasant surprise. The two of you had gone to a café to catch up. He mentioned his need for a roommate, and since then you'd been inseparable. He re-introduced you to the boys, including Minho who you’d already been in touch with. They’d all been friends even after high school and throughout college, their old group intact. Well, except for him.

Chan had moved away just a few weeks after you had, according to Felix. It had been quite sudden, and there were barely any goodbyes, just like with you. Half the guys had been relieved, apparently. Especially Minho.

Everything that had happened back in high school seemed extremely childish, now that you were an adult with a job and bills to pay. However, you still couldn't exactly find it in your heart to forgive Chan. He was your first love, after all...and those tend to turn bittersweet. He'd betrayed your trust and played with your feelings. Yes, you were young and naïve, but you should have seen it coming- you'd always thought he was too perfect for you. Too good to be true...

You almost fell forward when the door suddenly opened, snapping out of your thoughts as Felix caught you, chuckling.

"Take a shower, sleepyhead." He chuckled, ruffling your hair as he let you go and walked over to the kitchen, presumably to make breakfast.

You smiled as he left, sleepily removing your sweatpants and shirt when you heard your phone ring from on top of the sink. Pausing, you inched closer and grabbed it as you shut the door, lifting the phone to your ear after a quick glance at the caller ID.

"Minho! I was just about to take a shower-"

A chuckle from the other end. "Sure, I was just calling to remind you."

"Remind me? Of what?"

"We were planning to go to the mall today!" His indignant voice came shooting into your ears. You winced and giggled, clutching the phone tighter as a loud sigh came through.

"Chill, I didn't forget."

A huff. "Good. I'll pick you up in a bit."

You ended the call, a faint smile lingering on your face. Your unlikely friendship with Minho was one the universe itself probably didn't see coming, in all honesty.

You still remembered how vile he used to be. Yes, he had a reason, but that didn’t exactly erase all the pain and discomfort he’d put you through.

He’d shown massive regret, though. Proved that he changed for the better. Besides, you couldn’t exactly push him away after finding out what connected the two of you. So, you’d forgiven him...

You wondered if you would ever find it in yourself to forgive Chan the same way- if you ever see him again, that is. The pain he’d caused was worse. You’d trusted him...loved him, only to find out he’d been using you all along. That he was in love with someone else, even as he hugged you and kissed you. As you brushed your teeth, your mind drifted, memories made with him replaying in your head. The feeling of his soft lips pressed against yours...intertwined fingers, his arms wrapped firmly around you as a storm raged on, a similar one swirling in your heart.

You shook your head, rinsing your mouth as you reminded yourself that it was all in the past. There was no point thinking about Chan anymore. You had Felix and Minho, your best friends and the only people that mattered, currently. It was all you needed.

***

Chan’s grip on the steering wheel was loose, his eyes half-open as he drove. He was way too tired, and it was probably dangerous to drive in his state. He was already close, though.

He briefly averted his eyes from the road to check the directions Felix had texted him. Yes, he’d arrive any minute now.

His heart was pounding. He couldn’t believe he was back here, years later. He’d missed this town, to be honest. And yet, at the time, his parents’ transfer had felt like a blessing. A way to escape from the pain he’d felt at your betrayal, as well as your sudden departure.

Felix had told him. You were his roommate. There was a lump in his throat, nervousness and anxiety at the thought of seeing you again brimming up. He didn’t know if he was ready.

The initial anger he’d felt when he saw you with Minho had faded away. All that was left now was disappointment, a faint sadness lingering in the back of his mind at all times.

You’d been the one to show him what happiness felt like. He’d felt it when cuddling your small frame- skin pressed against skin, your radiant smile etching itself into his brain. He’d felt it when you took him to that museum, showing him what true beauty was.

He couldn’t forget what you felt like. He’d tried to, with numerous people. And yet...all he could think about was you. Even now, as an adult. And here he was, mere minutes away from having to see your face again.

Just be quick. In, out. Greet Felix, catch up with him a little and that’s it. Come on, Chan. You can do this...

He parked the car, swallowing as he stepped out. This was it.

***

You pulled up your pants just as you heard the doorbell ring. “Coming!’ You shouted, zipping up as you ran over to the door, opening it and glaring.

"Ah, finally! You're late."

"I had to drop Dea at school." Minho shook his head, entering your apartment and heading straight to the kitchen, the enticing smells luring him in.

"Oh. How is she? It's been a while since I saw her."

"She's good. Misses you a little. She asked me when we're all going to hang out again."

"Soon." You assured, knowing you weren't that busy the following week. Following him into the kitchen, you watched Felix flip the pancakes, looking up as Minho entered.

"Hey, Min. Didn't know you were coming today. Want some?" He tilted his chin towards the pan.

Minho smirked and grabbed one of the strawberries Felix had set aside, popping into his mouth and shaking his head. "No, thanks. We've got a movie to catch, so we have to leave right away." You pouted at that, crossing your arms. "But I don't wanna be hungry! Want pancakes." You mumbled.

The two men looked at you, eyebrows raised at your sudden display. Felix cringed, chuckling as Minho cooed at you.

"You're so cute." He pinched your cheek, looking back at his watch. "Ah fuck, we really have to go now, Y/n."

"But-" You looked over at Felix, who flashed you an apologetic grin as Minho grabbed your hand, practically dragging you over to the door.

"Wait!" Felix suddenly called out, cursing under his breath as he remembered what he was supposed to tell you. Fuck, he’d almost forgot.

"There's no time to waste! We'll be back later, Lix-"

It was too late. Felix was secretly glad Minho was taking you away though. Maybe he could quickly get things done with Chan, and get him to leave before you come back? No...it would be unfair to keep the truth from you. He didn't want you to run into Chan on accident, and quite possibly murder him when you get home.

Calming down a little, he turned back to his pan, just as Minho opened the door.

Wait-

Your eyes widened as your eyes landed on the man standing in front of you.

No. It couldn't be...were you hallucinating? Or was that really Chan, frozen in place with his finger hovering over the doorbell?

Unfortunately, it wasn't a trick your brain was playing on you. Minho was staring at Chan too, shell-shocked as the latter's gaze drifted down to your intertwined hands.

A mass of uncomfortable feelings and emotions you'd repressed for years bubbled up to the surface, almost making you want to throw up. This couldn't be happening.

Chan felt the same way. So you were still with Minho? Fuck, the regret in him was raw, painful as it resurfaced. Suddenly, the anger was back.

The prolonged silence was suspicious to Felix. "Hey, guys...?" He frowned and left the kitchen, stopping in his tracks as he saw Chan and you, icy glares evident as you stared at each other.

"Fuck." He gulped, inching closer to the three. "Um. This was what I m-meant to tell you, Y/n. Surprise! Chan's back!" He giggled nervously, the anger in your eyes scaring him slightly as you turned to look at him.

Chan gritted his teeth, eyes still trained on your hands. “I’m back.” He repeated, glaring at you.

Fuck.

#chan angst #bang chan angst #chan smut #bang chan smut #minho fluff #felix fluff #skz angst #skz smut #skz fluff #stray kids angst #stray kids smut #stray kids fluff #minho smut #chan x reader #bang chan series

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bippityboppitybibuck · 3 years

Text

@valleydean As of the start of writing this it's nearly 3:30 in the morning, I am almost exactly 13 hours away from the minute I was born on this day 23 years ago and I am awake thinking about Dean fucking Winchester so here you go. As a weird birthday gift from me to you on my birthday, I present mild angst but also of course fluff. By the time you get this my birth minute will have passed and I will be 23 ((oh my god just like Dean and Cas AGS.)) As with all of my ags posting this contains spoilers for the story, you’ve been warned!!

Dean’s 27th birthday snuck up on him. Well, as much as a date that comes around every year without fail can sneak up on a person who also has a solid five people clamouring to remind him. Somehow even Jack memorized the date after he heard Cas talk about it one time years ago and now the kid won’t stop bringing it up, which yeah is cute as hell but also Dean’s never been one to make a big deal of his birthdays before.

But 27 fucks him up. And hard.

He’s officially lived longer than Dean Wesson did, which sure, he technically did when he made it to the end of December, but the milestone feels bigger now that he’s 27. He’s 27. Dean’s never been 27 before because Dean Wesson never made it to 27.

It shouldn't mean anything, Dean Wesson is as much him as he is, even more so now that there’s no door keeping the memories from the light of day, but as he'd watched the clock flick from 11:59 to 12:00 with Cas beside him ready to give him his first of 27 birthday kisses something within him had felt morosely finalized.

A chapter closed, one that he’ll never be able to reopen the same way he did the first time around. Dean Wesson’s story is over. Dean Wesson’s story is his, but a part of it, the largest, hell only, part of that story came to a close when those red numbers switched over.

He doesn't know what to feel. He doesn’t know how to feel the loss, he died so young, he died with so much life still to live, he died and left Sam to live his decades out alone. He was young.

It never registered, even back then, how young he was, and he’s sure that with every birthday he has going forward that feeling is only going to get worse.

He and Charlie spent the Halloween of their 21st year watching the clock in a similar way. Waiting for the moment they lived longer than the Potter’s did - Charlie's idea that Dean went along with without putting up a fight - and it felt like this did. A shock to the system, a race won that you hadn’t known you were running. The realization that they were barely adults and now you are there living past what they ever got to.

Except, this time, it’s him he outlived. He outlived himself. It’s different for Cas, or at least Dean thinks it is, because there was never that separation, that differentiation within Cas of his two lives because there was no distinct difference when it came to his knowledge and understanding of his old life - and therefore no disconnect from himself in that way. Cas’ disconnect came in another way but Cas has already outlived himself sorta… it’s hard for Dean to tell when technically Cas has only really been alive for a short time but still was resurrected at the age he died at. Either way, Cas never made a fuss about being older than his past self.

The clock reads 12:02 now, Cas is sitting behind him, arms wrapped around his middle and Dean can’t think of what to say. 27 isn't a big birthday milestone, there's no grand party waiting for him with cards that list his age or balloons or any of the hooplas that 30 or 50 gets but this birthday feels more momentous than any he’s had or will ever have. He just doesn’t know how to deal with that yet, so he just goes and grabs it all right by the horns.

“I’m older than he was,” he says into the stillness of the dark room.

“Who? - oh, yes I suppose you are,” Cas responds, dropping his chin against Dean’s shoulder and resting it there.

“You never loved me at 27 before, is it any different?” There's a fear there he can’t name, something brought forth from etches in his bones that whisper that Cas may never love him like he did Dean Wesson, shared memories be damned, years spent together be damned.

“Mhmm, no it’s not, I love you all the same. Maybe even a little more now. A little more love with every year we get together that we never got before. Also, I’m loving you right now, that counts as loving you at 27 doesn’t it?”

“Yeah, I guess it does.” He drops his head back against Cas’ shoulder, their cheeks brushing gently together with the ebb and flow of their breathing.

“Do you feel any different?” Cas asks lightly, tentatively, as though he knows Dean is struggling with this new reality.

“Outrageously so. But I couldn’t begin to tell you why. There's just this thought that he’s not there anymore, he doesn’t have any side-by-side memories now. I don’t have any memories anymore… I sorta got used to them always being there, following me through the things I experienced in real time. But now I’m going to do things and I won’t be able to think back to what I did before. He’s not felt so separate since before Dorthey and the manor and I don’t really know what to make of it.”

“You know you can mourn him Dean. That is allowed. You can mourn that loss of yourself. Grieve for the future you didn’t get before.”

“But why should I? I mean I’m here now, with you, Sam, Mom, Charlie, Kelly and Jack too even if they are thousands of miles away. I’m getting to live, I’m getting my future and Dean Wesson is getting it too because he’s me, I’m him. I just - he feels disjointed within me now and I want the peace back but I don’t know how I’ll ever manage to get it when from here on out Dean Wesson stops being there alongside Dean Winchester. I’m moving away from him and like everything that dies, he’s stuck perpetually at 26. He’s stuck and I have to leave him behind.”

Something thick coats his throat with the words, a darkness that seeps in and threatens to choke him if he’s not careful. Grief is such a finicky thing.

“You don’t have to Dean, same as you don’t have to leave your middle school self behind or your pre my resurrection self behind. It’s all you in there still. You get to pick what you carry with you for the rest of your life. If you don’t want to leave that part of yourself in your past, then don’t and keep it with you.”

Dean’s quiet for a while, thinking about a lot of shit, including how the hell Cas managed to get so good at this shit, because that little speech would put Dr. Phil to shame in an instant. But then of course Cas would probably have had to do the very thing he’s telling Dean now.

“Do you remember how we spent my first 25th birthday?” Dean asks.

“Hmm, I do, and I gotta say the frozen ass I got from the fence was completely worth it.”

Dean huffs a laugh into the darkness, picking his head up from Cas’ shoulder as he asks, “Do you think that for the first birthday he won’t have we could do that again? Fly back to Amherst, maybe see Kelly and Jack too?”

“Absolutely, but no smoking this time, even if I did get a rise out of you back then.”

“You bastard, I knew that was intentional!”

“You caught me,” Cas says, the phrase all but dripping in sarcasm. “Jack will be thrilled to see us again, Kelly too.”

He smiles picturing it. Cas playing with Jack, running around the backyard of the duplex Kelly bought only a year ago, smiles wide, Jack’s blonde hair sticking haphazardly out of his puffball touque, Cas’ hair tucked into a hat he’ll surely steal from Dean. Their joyful shouts echoing around them all. So like they used to all those years ago when Jack was barely five, and now he’s almost double digits and Dean can’t remember the years flying by until he looked back and they were already so securely in the rearview.

“I’m old now,” Dean says a little while later.

“If it makes you feel any better, regardless of what that fake ID you made says, my birth year is technically 1845 so… I’ve got you beat in the old age department.”

“Oh Cas, you don’t look a day over a hundred and twenty, you’re fine,” Dean jokes, Cas’ light mood rubbing off on him.

Dean gets a pinch to the ribs in retaliation and awards Cas an indignant squawk and a begrudgingly given laugh before he settles back against him, his eyes slipping closed though he wants not for sleep.

“What should we do now, I’m not particularly tired, and I feel certain in assuming that you aren’t either,” Cas murmurs lowly, breath dusting the shell of his ear soothingly.

“I dunno, maybe we should just keep sitting here,” Dean says, a memory playing behind his closed eyelids. In the heat of the room, frozen air bites at his skin just as it did back then.

Cas answers this time around, but instead of using words he pulls Dean in for a kiss - the second of his 27 birthday kisses - and within that press of lips Dean knows he remembers too.

Their skin pressed firmly together, neither move, their eyes kept forward, staring through the window at the still portrait of the winter stars.

#ags #a ghost story #destiel #destiel ficlet #my writing #ags ficlet #its my birthday and i am thinking about the sadness of birthdays no longer celebrated #valleydean #read the og story for real tho #you will not regret it

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iaintyourbro · 4 years

Text

The New Red Herrings: Biggs and Zack and How Avalanche Tells Us the LTD is Dead

Biggs and Zack are seemingly alive at the end of FFVII Remake Part 1 - so what does that mean? Will they live throughout the story? Maybe they’ll be like Wedge and escape death initially, only to be forced to face it shortly after?

There’s also interesting similarities on the death scenes of Biggs and Zack, A while ago I took screenshots of the “death” scene of Biggs and thought it was interesting how they had Biggs touch Cloud’s head and also made him promise something.

And how are all these things connected to the LTD?

Now, clearly, neither Biggs or Jessie had as dramatic of a death as Zack or Aerith. We actually see the initial injury or incident that causes each of them to die. Cloud comes upon Biggs while he’s already sitting down injured. Cloud and Tifa come to Jessie after she’s under the rubble and try to save her.

We know Cloud pretty much loses it when Zack dies. He collapses mentally. He’s already been through enough shit to fill a lifetime, and now his only friend, his best friend, and the guy who saved his life, dies trying to get them back to Midgar.

Why Zack is Important to Cloud

Relationship wise, Cloud obviously had a much deeper connection to Zack. At the point that Biggs dies, he doesn’t know any of that, but I think his death definitely triggers something in him. Biggs saw through Cloud’s front. We know Biggs dealt with the kids at the Leaf House, and most likely acted like a volunteer in the Big Brother program. He tells Cloud he’s got a lot in common with the kids at the Leaf House.

Zack had Cloud take on the responsibility to be his living legacy. Of course we all know he shuts down about five minutes later. Biggs had Cloud promise that this wouldn’t all be for nothing. In both cases, it doesn’t work out. He forgets what Zack told him and the Sector 7 plate still falls.

Zack’s death has a major impact on Cloud - it’s ultimately what breaks him. It also gives us these really sad moments of somebody who’s already been through so much and is breaking now.

Cloud is upset about Biggs. He was becoming his friend. The three Avalanche members really did accept Cloud and tried to be his friend. He was included with them - in most cases. Of course there’s the Avalanche party that he’s kicked out of (mind you - he does this to himself by acting like an ass to Barret and them) and then during Chapter 4, he’s separated to go steal Jessie’s dad’s ID.

Ultimately, though, we know that Biggs, Wedge, and Jessie all like Cloud. They seem to see through the hard exterior pretty easily. So Cloud loses another person in his life.

The ending of FFVII Remake takes an interesting turn. Anybody who played OG or CC knows what is supposed to happen to Biggs and Zack.

But, Remake’s ending seems to imply that they survive the event that was supposed to take them out.

Did Zack survive the last stand? Is this a case of the Last Stand in CC being combined with OG where as they walk away, Zack ends up getting shot anyway?

So we also see Biggs.... wait, wrong picture.

That’s the right one. We get a shot of Charlie Sheen Biggs waking up in a bed in what looks like some type of either infirmary or large room. In OG, we know that all three of the Avalanche members die during the Sector 7 plate fall. In Remake, the only one we get confirmation on is Jessie, and that’s only in the Chapter description.

Wedge we know survives until the Shinra building, where the Whispers ultimately take him out since he defied fate.

So, what will happen to Biggs?

The biggest thing talked about seems to be the ending. Zack surviving created a lot of buzz. Is there a second timeline? Is he going to just simply walk another 10 feet and get shot in the back? Did her survive in the first place? Why does Stamp look different on that bootleg chip bag?

Will we have a beautiful Zerith reunion?

In the OG, the Love Triangle illusion was the red herring. This was mostly to trick and distract the player to focus on something, so later they can destroy you with major twists. It also was used to get the player to like Aerith so her death would be more impactful. In addition, it makes the whole Northern Crater confession from Cloud about Tifa’s opinion being the only one that matters a slam in your face of holy shit what is going on?!

At this point, everybody and their mother knows Aerith dies. It’s not something that was kept a secret. It’s referenced in various materials. The one thing not openly referenced is what’s going on with Cloud. They never reference the Lifestream, the fake persona, or anything outside of the OG and Ultimanias. I think this is a shame since it’s such an important part of his character arc, but I get that they want to try and leave the element of surprise in play.

I think everybody would agree that the moment you find out Cloud was just a grunt that was WITH Zack during the Nibelheim incident is super powerful. I still get chills all these years later. Letting this be a well known thing would take away the element of surprise from new fans. Of course, people can go online and read blogs like this one and know all of this, but for somebody - especially future generations - who may just be looking for a new game to play, you’d want this element of surprise to stay in tact.

We can’t use Aerith as the only red herring anymore, and we can’t use the love triangle. For many reasons. Everybody knows about it and the love triangle was a poor choice for something like this because some people missed the point completely.

Now, FFVII Twitter is always on fire.

Also, even though the Lifestream and Cloud’s true identity are pretty well kept secrets in terms of printed media, most of the people who played FFVII Remake played the original game, they know what happens. People who were new and played Remake first most likely went and bought OG and played it. So now they know what happens.

They knew this, or they probably wouldn’t have shown Cloud in this state, but even for those who don’t, the alternate timeline theory is born. Biggs enhances this theory because he’s alive too. How can Cloud walk past them AND be carried by Zack in some catatonic state?

It keeps us distracted. They want us to think that fate can be changed. In the case of Zack, they’re even saying that the past can be changed.

Ultimately, whatever they do, it’ll be shocking to most players. I do trust that the devs aren’t being deceitful when they say they are going to keep the major plot points the same and FFVII will be FFVII going forward. Part 1 keeps major plot points but adds substance to a lot of things. They took out unnecessary parts and enhanced others. They also removed a lot of the love triangle stuff.

Another striking thing with all of this is the Jessie factor. The Chapter screen tells us she died - it only says Biggs was seriously injured. That hasn’t stopped speculation.

The ending shows gloves on the table next to Biggs’ bed and a lot people said oh it’s Jessie’s left glove! And it does appear that it is. There’s only one glove. To me, this seems like they recovered her body and were able to pull of some personal affects of hers to leave with Biggs. Both articles look damaged or faded.

Faded could mean they’ve been sitting in the sun for a while. The incident happened a few days ago, though we don’t have a definitive time on when we’re shown Biggs. This could be a future look.

They also could simply be damaged and full of dust from the plate collapse.

It is implied in Chapter 4 if you listen to the conversation between Jessie’s mom and the gang that Biggs and Jessie have a different relationship than Wedge and Jessie.

I have some thoughts on what this may mean:

Biggs is Jessie’s BFF and her mom likes him.

Jessie and Biggs dated at one point and decided to not tell her mom that they no longer are or that its casual.

Jessie’s mom was hounding Jessie about finding a man so she picked Biggs to be her pretend boyfriend and he agreed.

Biggs and Jessie are secretly dating and only her mom knows.

Which one do I think it is? Well, knowing Jessie, I can definitely see her doing #3. I can absolutely see her acting like Biggs is her boyfriend to get her mom off her back. I think #1 and #2 are also huge possibilities. #4 is far fetched, but they could cover it up by having Jessie flirt relentlessly with Cloud and appear to be single.

Some people think that Jessie will end up at the Gold Saucer singing. Personally, I really hope not. If they keep a bunch of people alive (even if it’s for a short amount of time), it really takes away one of the major themes of FFVII which is death and moving on. In addition, I think it’s too many people they’d need to kill off later. Jessie is a very popular character, so I hope they don’t take that as an incentive to change that aspect of the story.

Aerith’s funeral and Jessie’s death are similar as well, so I think it is foreshadowing some things.

We get a princess style carry here. Aerith and Jessie both get these in Remake. Jessie’s second one ends in her death. Will Aerith get a second princess carry by Cloud? Will it be to take her to her final resting place?

Maybe she won’t even go to the lake - maybe to the sky?

We know Tifa was super upset in OG, and they really don’t touch on it much. We only see her run away crying after this moment. You learn in Case of Tifa that she’s really upset about, but a lot of people don’t read Case of Tifa, so they only know this scene.

We know that she gets very upset over Jessie’s death.

I think Aerith’s death will be much worse.

It seems Jessie’s death is a reference to how Aerith’s death was handled in the OG.

Will it be handled the same? Maybe. I think they’re going to make it seem like she’s going to be okay, and then boom.

So the ending gives us hope that we have two friends that are alive. It makes us think that we can save Aerith. I do think Wedge’s death towards the end and comments that Red XIII made in Chapter 17 may also be hinting towards the fact that you cannot change the past and you cannot change fate.

Over on Discord, @anesuna brought up a good point about Wedge’s cats. Biggums survives the plate collapse along with Wedge. The other two cats - Reggie and Smalls - sadly perish (::cries a lot::). This could also be a reference that Biggs survived while Jessie and Wedge do not.

So what about the LTD?

I think this is a heavy reference to the old OG love triangle. Don’t fall for it! They’re warning players now instead of wanting them to fall for it.

Why do I say this? Aerith seemed to think the love triangle was fun. Thing is, Cloud wasn’t all there at this point, so it was just an illusion. Since players didn’t seem to get that the first time, they’re going to make it clear now. There were a lot of aspects they seemed to take from Aerith and give to Jessie. Overly flirty (with Jessie they added thirsty) and being overly childish at times. Aerith in remake is still somewhat childish, but not completely.

Oblivious Cloud is Oblivious. Yeah, he was oblivious in OG that Aerith and Tifa had feelings for him. He has no idea what Wedge is talking about now. Earlier in this same conversation he thinks that Wedge is telling him not to come around because people will gossip about Jessie being in Avalanche, but the player knows really what he’s referring to...

I think this is probably a reference to the Gold Saucer date because of the stage part. I take things at face value and don’t really dig too deep, but I think this exchange with Wedge is supposed to tell the player not to fall for these false loves early in the game.

It’s brought up again during Aerith’s resolution scene.

Earlier Wedge said not to fall for Jessie’s trick, because it was a game to her. It wasn’t real love. Aerith is now telling her that if Cloud thinks he falls in love with her, it’s not real.

We have two separate instances in the game where they’re telling you to beware of the false love. It’s two times the word love is used.

After all of this, the ending presents us with two guys who should be dead that appear to be alive. One of them is directly connected to Aerith.

This was their way of trying to shut down the LTD and replace it with different red herrings. Will it work as well as the LTD? Well, it seems that the majority of FFVII Remake fans have talked about the ending.

Yes, a lot of people talk about the LTD, but I think the majority of players are more interested overall in what happens next and what’s up with Zack. I think the majority of the fandom is also ready for the LTD to officially be dead so we can actually focus on everything else and stop the madness.

It’ll never fully stop, but at least it’ll be clear for anybody who plays the game and alleviate the bulk of the chaos.

Say hello to your new red herrings: Biggs and Zack.

Say bye to the LTD.

412 notes · View notes

hei-ch0u · 3 years

Text

It’s long...(fair warning) ✰

Shingeki no Kyojin 139 (Theories)

Since everyone is throwing around their theories from the wild to the more likely, I thought I should contribute. After all, it will be the last time we can theorise this amazing manga full of all its twists and turns. Like most, I do agree with the popular fan theories simply because this manga is consistently unpredictable with each chapter. Let’s face it, some stories are easily picked apart these days and finding one that continuously has you thinking about what could occur is a winning tale. So first, I will start off by saying that I am so sad that Shingeki no Kyojin is coming to an end. But! I will never forget this amazing manga as I have grown so attached to the characters and the story as you can tell from the past nearly 9 years of running this blog. So, thank you yams for being such a genius! Regardless of the ending, it will go down in history as one of the best stories I personally have ever read and witnessed.

With typical fan theories, I won’t go into them too much as I feel the concept of the “time loop” has been written about to filth and I think it is very blatantly clear at this point that the concept of a time loop is very likely in one way or another given the overall concept within aot/snk in general - there is a obvious manipulation of past, present and future. I will hold my hands up and say that I definitely do agree with ‘some’ popular fan theories and will list a fair few below in brief detail - as I do think they are highly likely to be true in some way or at least implied within the last chapter. Now, with the usual leak dates coming up on the horizon, I wanted to put my input in before hand. Although, because of recent prosecution warnings for leaking the final chapter - I would advise others just to wait for the 9th of April on official release for concrete facts rather than speculations and leaks simply because we have seen with past few chapters that a lot of false spoilers get released and I think with the final chapter it would be wise to wait as I have previously stated on here that it will be the ‘revelation’ chapter that ties this manga together.

So! With the typical fan theories, we see the likes of:

Eren being the baby daddy to Historia’s baby

Eren sacrificing his reason for living - freedom. By being the greater evil to bring about the greater good

The baby itself could become the new beast titan or baby Eren/Ymir reborn

Eren isn’t dead, but on Paradis by way of transferring his subconscious into a crystallised version of himself

Eren and Ymir have struck a deal

And of course - the time loop concept

…The list is endless of popular fan theories. It would be silly not to agree with any of them given the story and where we are currently at, its very clear that Historia, Eren and Ymir will play a big part somehow in the final chapter (if not id be genuinely shocked) since majority of the past few chapters they have been absent in full form and I feel this needs to be explained. After all we still haven’t seen the full extent of the memories of past/future that Eren was aware of from his contact with Historia and his connection with Ymir in Paths. We saw 137 being predominantly Armin based, 138 being Mikasa based and I think it is only reasonable given his absence as the initial protagonist that Eren will be the revelation within 139. Ultimately culminating EMA / the trio as a whole. We began with them, so it only makes sense to end with them (albeit separately as individuals).

Moving on, as you can see I agree with said fan theories as I think any route could be possible! The thing with Shingeki no Kyojin is that it has many hidden ‘Easter eggs’ (how fitting given its easter), whether it be in the background of scenes, characters wording, placement of scenes/characters, flashbacks, paths and even in the opening and ending credits of the anime we see hidden meanings through imagery. It has all been laid out very well for our finding, its just if we have an intuitive enough imagination to pick it apart and figure things out. This leads on to my own theory/theories (it can go any way and I wont sugarcoat it - I could be reaching)

I generally have 2 theories that run about in my head with how the story itself could turn out or how it works. Both theories kind of tie together in one way or another featuring predominantly Eren and then Mikasa or overall ‘Ackerman’ blood/gene concept and its potential involvement in control of said time loop. I will do my best to include manga panels to give visual insight to the points.

To begin, I want to touch on Mikasa's “dream” in 138 - although devastating, I think it is being taken as the opposite of what it was and personally I see many looking at it through rose tinted glasses. This wasn’t an alternative universe (in my opinion), this was Mikasa’s Ideal life - her dream. When it comes to Eren as a connection to Mikasa, he is her reason for being, even in death she chooses not to part with him for her own good and creates a dreamlike reality for herself to make herself go through with the deed. She as a character has dominantly surrounded her existence on Eren, he is categorised many times within the manga as ‘home’ - like other fan theories have stated, it has been mentioned many times Mikasa referencing the word ‘home’ and also how she wants to ‘be close to him’ because it gives her comfort and strength. The Ackermans as a whole have attachments to people and this is where they ultimately gain strength from. Without any of the Ackermans ‘attachments’ being in danger or being killed, their powers wouldn’t be awakened and without them I feel their strength almost weakens until they find a new reason for living to keep moving forward. I’ll touch more on the ‘Ackerman’ theory later as its one of the open loopholes still currently alive within the manga.

Mikasa has always been a character that confuses me, particularly with the way she acts and things she says or thinks. She has said many things that don’t make sense unless she has a certain belief system or knows of things from past lives.

Examples:

As you can see and I will produce more evidence of such comments further in. She implies that she either believes in reincarnation or she is aware of different periods within the said time loop. She speaks of starting over, being dead and returning and implies in different ways that she is scared of the same thing happening again. The last panel - what plan is she on about here? Her own plan. In my opinion it is - "Don't let Eren die". As we have seen, that may be what has to happen. It's fate. She interferes with this and never lets him go.

Mikasa does have an unhealthy bond with Eren, I do think he loves her ( I’m not dismissing that ) but do I think its the type of intense love she feels? no. Some things she has came out with has even shocked other characters and countless times her comrades have tried to ‘break the barrier’ to get her to realise her way of thinking when it comes to Eren is unhealthy. Hence why I think we seen Jean in this particular scene below so frustrated

not because he himself has feelings for her, but because she’s not letting them get through to her that she is refusing to believe Eren could ultimately be a changed person (which he definitely is, I’ll not go into my rant of why he isn’t ‘evil or a ‘monster’ because i’ve done so already) but overall, Mikasa constantly makes excuses for Eren and doesn’t recognise it, her life revolves around being close to Eren and she gets very emotionally troubled at the idea of not being with him or him ultimately taking a path that doesn’t involve her. We even seen Annie question her and this wasn't many chapters ago and she replies with the same mindset of bringing back "the old Eren". He is not the person he once was particularly as a child. Something that is implied at beginning of manga, it opens with them as children and somehow links with 138.

As stated by Armin below we see him even explaining to Mikasa that Eren’s never close, he always takes his own route and that ultimately both Armin and Mikasa aren’t his reason for living. Let’s face it - Freedom is Eren’s reason for being, his only desire. Armin has also expressed disbelief and almost frustration at her way of thinking when it comes to him (below examples) I think in a way the famed ‘table scene’ was Eren trying to break the bond, but he’s not doing that for no reason, its implied he does it to protect them, but it could also be because of what he has seen in memories past and future - he has perhaps became aware of Mikasa’s involvement within paths and the loop. He has to try to alter her way of thinking to protect her, but maybe also himself.

Armin + Other comrades reactions to Mikasa’s mindset

Another visual point to make regarding Mikasa’s ties with previous loops and Armin, was her comment made about him at a very early stage in the manga just after Eren had been eaten by a titan after saving Armin - leaving his fate at this point unknown.

this is implying that Mikasa has some knowledge of previous times Armin has helped them with his ‘ability’ which if we are referencing him as a character is his methodical intelligence. But, even here he is confused by the comment, simply because at this point there has been no signs of Armin’s usage of this ability - mainly fear and lack of confidence with that in comparison of his peers. We don’t necessarily see this until perhaps even a chapter later and as far as we are aware, Mikasa doesn't follow through with “i’ll tell you about it later”.

I don’t know about anyone else, but it seems odd she has such an attachment to Eren like this that is so intense. It’s not normal to be as intense as she is about someone unless she is used to losing that person over and over. Even as children Mikasa acted possessive over the ‘concept’ of Eren dying - it wasn’t allowed to happen. She doesn’t have this intense reaction with Armin or other comrades. She fixates on the idea of Eren being her saviour, the one to give her a ‘home’ and a ‘purpose’. Mikasa consistently opposes his death and his death alone, I can only see this from a standpoint that deep within her own memory she has experienced his death countless times before. She even uses force a couple of times to increase this intensity. Here are some examples of this even in childhood -

There are many more examples of this throughout the manga and her refusal to accept that what she doesn’t want, may just happen. Now this might just be my over active imagination or my own ability of media studies kicking in. But, previously I had been under the impression in the presence of a time loop that Eren was in charge of it and controlling it, that somehow it would constantly reoccur when he himself died and he would have to come up with a way to either prevent his death or ultimately stop the timeline of the titans. Whether that be under making a deal with Ymir herself or by essentially “breaking the wheel” and turning others against him to show Eldians as triumphant heroes.

However, the more i’ve thought about it and given the revelations of 138 - i would be more inclined to say it is Mikasa Ackerman herself due to either her specifically or her Ackerman gene. There is something about the bloodline that is missing and we have not had the fabled Ackertalk or much explanation of how they work (something I’d like to see covered in 139 - although i feel it will be an Eren chapter, I also think it will include the visions Eren has seen to give an explanation of why the previous 138 chapters played out the way they did)

I think there is a possibility Eren had to break the wheel on the loop, Mikasa would go back each time and always Eren would die, something we’ve established she tries to prevent and never accepts. The only escape was her accepting his death therefore he did everything he could to push her away, break the bond and push her to kill him to end the cycle (since he’s seen the future). As I have a hunch previously in other loops he was not killed by her hand - it had to be her to break the cycle or vice versa (but we will get to this).

there is hints of this in the “Lost Girls” OVA. Yes, I am aware it’s said that OVAS are not necessarily canon per say, but I don’t think it would have so many open links if Isayama himself didn't want it to. This particular one gives many hints to Mikasa’s involvement in the loop and alternative universe theories. The anime adaptations are on point with showing us details we only recognise after more plot points are revealed. It may explain the headaches, every time Eren dies, she reverses the loop or changes realities. This ailment could be a product of her memory issues. In the OVA we see Mikasa in real time thinking about Eren and his constant state of taking his own path.

After this moment, the said “Scene” she speaks of is revealed to us. Another example of Mikasa’s dreamlike state or perhaps another timeline? We are taken back to the time where she had given up, had ran out of gas, a titan was approaching and she was ‘lost’ - her reason for being was gone and she knew her death was coming, but also in the manga during this scene she is “worried” she’ll have to start again (above in examples). This again implies she knows something we don’t. We then hear Mikasa’s voice speaking to Mikasa herself, telling her that if she simply didn’t like this reality she could choose the place she wanted, but as we have seen before - she can’t stop his death.

The peculiar scene in this OVA that got me intrigued by this theory is the masked figure and young mikasa scene. Mikasa is rushing to meet with Eren and Armin to escape the walls in a hot air balloon, but she has to be there by a certain time or the plan fails. As she is running she is stopped by a mysterious masked figure who asks her to join in on his hypnotism trick to spectators. Comments he makes involve him telling her that her ‘friend’ will ultimately leave her and that she couldn’t accept his death and created this universe. Also, that he is no one, but someone at the same time. I think this holds great significance since the strange thing about this is that his voice mirages into a distant adult Mikasa.

implying that she has to ‘kill’ a part of herself or she has to die to prevent and hault the loop. She has to return from her idealistic dreams of keeping him alive as it will only fail otherwise. Upon hearing of Eren’s yet again untimely death within this universe, she begins to have memory flashes of multiple scenes appearing within her eyes with a typical media ‘rewind’ sound as she wakes up back in the street with no gas and a titan approaching but... she says something I find interesting and links to what Eren says at the beginning of the manga

“the feeling I’ve had a really long dream”

We witness Mikasa have these “headaches” multiple times within the manga and in the anime they are heavily focused on whenever it happens, which we can only recognise that this is an important part of the story itself. Eren too has random headaches, just not as much as Mikasa, he mainly experiences them when he accesses new memories. However, what if Mikasa too is affected by memories she cannot tap into or it is paths/ackerman gene warning her she is repeating past mistakes?

Notice how there is a lot of emphasis on the word ‘again’ when it comes to her headaches or the thought of losing Eren. It is constantly repeated. I think it is highly likely she only remembers some parts from previous loops, but the one that sticks is simply - she has to save Eren each time, but fails. Everything begins again after his or her’s demise. Perhaps each time Eren is the one who dies first, creating a somewhat butterfly effect. That maybe Mikasa has died once like she implies in previous example. However, the one to die first (in this case primarily Eren) loses all memories of the past loops - again this is implied as Eren does tell Mikasa he cannot remember his dream. I think deep within his mind Mikasa does remember, but given the fact she has potentially reversed the outcome many times...her memory is simply warped - that or she died in the previous loop and lost those components.

Will she not remember due to her memories being altered in her death?

Either way something needs to change. Eren Kruger says this in Eren’s attack titan memories. They are doing something wrong.

I believe Eren in 138 within Mikasa’s dream, was trying to tell her to move on, not necessarily forget him, but at least accept his passing - to stop the loop reoccurring, he influenced part of her reality...maybe with the help of Ymir. In a way it could be implied Eren almost regrets wrapping the scarf around her (this is heavily emphasised as a symbol of their relationship), for me the scarf seems like a softer symbolism for a chain - a binding if you will. By wrapping it round Mikasa he binds her to him. He has always insisted she should throw it away, even in 138 within her own conjured reality he says the same. She needs to kill this part of herself or “the same history” will be repeated. I do have a HUGE feeling in my heart, head and gut that Mikasa may need to end up dead first as I do have another HUGE feeling that Eren is not dead (maybe its wishful thinking, but his death doesn’t make sense right now, so Yams I trust in you for explanation). His death seemed too convenient.

Now, before I go onto “Ackerman” gene factors, I’ll briefly bring in another peculiarity I have always had about a particular scene in the beginning of the manga. After it is decided Eren will carry the boulder to plug the wall, Eren (the attack titan) seemingly loses control and succumbs to pure rage, in turn he attacks Mikasa. Something he hasn’t done against humans unless its free will.

However, a part of me has always felt that this could be the attack titan itself (in past inhabitants and memories) recognising her as a threat and trying to rid her of the world first to avoid the loop of Eren dying first to Mikasa controlling the loop to return to try to save Eren - nothing changes. This is what I meant by “breaking the wheel”, we have saw it in other tales, things can’t change unless you choose a different path than the same one with the same brutal cycle. As Kruger says, to save Mikasa and Armin, Eren has to change things - this could be to separate not only Armin, but Mikasa from him, that maybe in previous loops...they follow him. In this instance, he has definitely separated Armin and by way of second hand - Mikasa too. Hence why Ymir says goodbye to Eren in 138, he is free. Another notable concept is that aot/snk is made up of trios, we see it in:

Eren / Mikasa / Armin

Reiner / Bertholdt / Annie

Connie / Jean / Sasha

Hanji / Erwin / Levi

Levi / Farlan / Isabel

Kenny / Levi / Mikasa

It would partially make sense for the trio to be the reasoning for the ending. Almost illuminati based - very yams style.

Why not Mikasa?

Lets talk Ackerman and a slightly different theory, but with relation!

(Obviously, I cannot provide much evidence to support any Ackerman based theories other than what has already been provided, which isn’t a lot to be fair. Dammit Yams)

I want to briefly start off on the Ackerman front with a brief comparison of our two currently known Ackermans: Levi and Mikasa. The main categorising difference between these two is that Levi moves on regardless of what happens to him or his comrades or his ‘attachments’. He also does not appear to experience these headaches, some say he does, but I can’t find evidence. Isayama shows these headaches with a throbbing sign around Mikasa’s head - so unless the Ackertalk happens and Levi confirms it, its still absent in theory. Levi treats Ackerman-ism as moving on, making choices with no regrets (as his backstory indicates) and even in current states he has said he doesn’t regret his decisions. It is why he is able to move forward and keep surviving. Its simple...his mindset is stronger than Mikasa's, she is the weaker link. This could be due to age difference and overall past experience, Levi has more life experience as an Ackerman to have mastered his emotion and reactions to outcomes - he accepts the bad.

Mikasa is weaker in this regard, perhaps if you link it back to the theory of her control of the loop...due to this weakness she creates the loop since she can’t accept his death and tries to return to make amends. I think in reality, Eren knows due to the attack titan ability - he will die. Hence why he appeared so shocked upon making contact with Historia to then very depressed and detached before vanishing in Marley. He became aware of the outcome and I don’t know about anyone else, but I’d be depressed too after finding out my life was made to end especially since all he wanted as a character was Freedom. Eren x Freedom will be the only canon ship at this rate.

However, I do think the only way she can create said loop is through her Ackerman gene. Ackermans are products of ‘titan science’, they were genetically engineered (if you want to put it that way) to have titan like abilities while still maintaining their human form and sense of self being. Created to protect the Fritz family (royal blood), to eventually being ostracised for their dismissal of the plan to wipe Eldian’s memories. Therefore banished, but allowed to live, I can only see there being one reason why - they would be still useful at some point and their deaths/extinction would be wasteful.

From what we know and can tell from mere viewing, the Ackermans are very skilled and powerful beings that have ‘hosts’ or attachments (I like this name better) to channel their goals, strength and energy into. They were made to protect, fight and survive. The only surviving Ackermans are Levi and Mikasa.

They cannot be affected by the founding titan and their memories cannot be altered. But, this brings about another question. Why were they created to protect the founding titan, yet could not be controlled by it? The theory with this bloodline is that they can do more than what we see, that they themselves don’t know it yet. One in particular can alter realities - that being Mikasa (as we don’t have mass amounts of information on Levi’s experiences other than his surge of power awakenings demonstrated throughout the manga to confirm his part) due to fact Levi really only knew he was an Ackerman within his 30′s after the previous Ackerman - Kenny, dies and informs him of this. Mikasa has always been aware.

Mikasa’s ‘Power’ ultimately has something to do with the Attack Titan and the Founding titan - that being Eren and Ymir combined. In past loops, I believe each time she has seen Eren die she has said “see you later, Eren”... hence the ending of 138 and the beginning of the manga. Isayama did say the beginning would relate to the ending. Each time this happens they are transcended to the point Eren wakes up at the tree within the walls to begin once more, its the only clear explanation for why Eren comments of her hair length. The attack titan itself is the component of Ymir that captivates her freedom, it continues to move forward for 2000 years each successor until one has the power (the desire for freedom like her) to release her from enslavement to the power of the titans. In this instance Eren too has been a slave to the power, lets for arguments sake blame Grisha for passing it on to him.

Again, with the Ackermans there is something I’ve always noticed between Levi and Mikasa - they have never touched skin to skin. It has always been over their clothing. I wonder if their Ackerman powers may stem similar to how Eren draws memories from contact with the royal family, i.e. Historia. They need to touch in order to access Paths and manifest it into their control. Eren is aware of this due to his connection to Ymir - there is heavy implied material to denote the idea of Ragnarok and reincarnation. Eren is the reincarnate of Ymir and previously I don’t think they were aware of this.

For anyone not familiar with the term “Ragnorok” - its definition has multiple meanings in Norse mythology. Particularly - development, origin, cause, relation and fate. It is a series of events that often lead to a great battle, the deaths of multiple people of importance to the ultimate end revelation of the world being remade and fertile (the opposite of Zeke’s plan) with the remaining ‘gods’ returning and ‘two’ human survivors repopulating the world. I personally believe this to be either two of these: Levi and Mikasa or Eren and Historia by the way of Ymir as the ultimate god, but just in different ways. The Ragnorok element is particularly of importance within Germanic studies, this would connect with Shingeki no Kyojin since it is implied its set in early germany/europe and given characters name origins - it makes sense.

The two human survivors are that of Lif and Lifbrasir (shown below) who survive by ‘hiding’ in the woods while the great battle commences.

They repopulate the world starting with a daughter. In germanic regions, the concept of mankind originated from trees is an ancient notion “the tree of life” essentially. Trees have a massive importance and connection in Shingeki no Kyojin, we see Eren wake up at one in the beginning, the main Path coordinate resembles a tree, Ymir originated from trees and being within the woods would indicate “trees”. This would make me more inclined to believe the Eren and Historia theory to be likely, simply because Historia is all the way back in Paradis and potentially Eren himself by transferring subconscious. To me it seems very likely the leaked final panel released by Yams himself is Eren holding a child rather than anyone else as whoever this figure is tells the child they are free and this could only relate to both Ymir and Eren, the ones who sought freedom. This could mean in this instance Levi and Mikasa are the ‘gods’, the ones with the power to restore and mend, again through the concept of the Ackerman Gene being more than what meets the eye. Ymir will be reborn ultimately and no longer enslaved as will Eren.

Ragnarok and Shingeki no Kyojin combined have connotations of ‘fate’ being a big part of their depths. It is fated. Everything is. Just like Eren’s death and potentially ability to be reborn into another timeline. Just like Eren’s fate to obtain the founding titan and attack titan, both very powerful titans in the manipulation of time and events. Eren makes a statement around chapter 123 in Paths when talking with Zeke that if someone tried to take his freedom, no matter who, he would remove theirs. That he has been like that since birth because he was “born into this world”.

Zeke: “Since birth?”

this further implies fate. He was born free, he expresses detest for people who aren’t free and bound by something, 2000 years, Ymir etc. This only ties together if Eren himself in past lives was someone with the same views and personality traits, like Mikasa, except hers are the opposite. Paths has always been there and everything that has happened in the past is imbedded within its clutches through Ymir. These two titans needed to be combined, Grisha was informed by Eren himself through Kruger and future versions of himself that he had to obtain the founder or nothing could be changed. Grisha is even seen asking Eren to show him everything that happens, whether carla dies etc. He did not have full control, this was made for Eren’s inhabitant period and he did not have access to all memories due to only being able to access the ones the future successor sends back in time. Like the mirror scene for example, Eren is speaking to someone else, not himself. Grisha was only instructed to go within the walls and have a family. Eren was instructed to save everyone. Remember that the common rule with time is that you cannot change the past or it significantly alters the future.

I believe all the memories (the ones we are seeing even now) are actually in paths, the story has always had an indication it is being ‘narrated’ by someone - in most instances this is Armin. This has implied he will survive into the future, but that others may not. How this will happen...I can only theorise that Ymir will factor into who lives or dies. She will need to leave paths however, the only way the titan curse will end is if she leaves and no one is there to build titans. She will be either reborn to capture her freedom or reborn through Eren for them both to obtain the same dream. There has been multiple theories that some other titan other than the attack titan could be the key or another character, like that of the Ackermans or armin for example as I do think the trio concept is likely. But, remember the manga is called “Shingeki no Kyojin” meaning “the attack titan” - its always been the key and Eren is that key...again, key? Eren. scarf? Mikasa. Equals symbolism.

At the end of the day, the characters who I feel personally will tie together the ending are Eren, Ymir, Historia and Levi, Mikasa, Armin - both trios on different sides of the coin. Just remember, this isn’t the type of story where the characters get what they desire and that they could die without obtaining these desires. Erwin died before learning the truth of the outside world. Hanji died. Sasha died, Niccolo lost her. Floch did not live to see Eldian rule. Levi may have killed Zeke, but what for? He killed a different version of him, not the one who murdered innocents in Shinganshina. Levi lost every attachment of his. Mikasa lost Eren. I’d be angry and sad for him, but Eren also could lose his freedom by striking a deal with Ymir for her own freedom. But! he could free the world and his friends through both Mikasa and Armin, the chain will break, the titan curse will end and he will cease to exist or be lost in Paths dormant, unlike Ymir for 2000 years. This would be a good culmination of Eren’s character, extremely heart breaking, but fitting. A character who only sought freedom for humanity. He is humanity’s hope after all. Remember, Kaji Yuki (Eren’s Japanese voice actor) expressed extreme sadness at learning Eren’s fate from Isayama. It has always been a manga that indicates a bittersweet ending, so this could also be highly likely. (Eren is my favourite character...so this guts my heart from my chest)

To conclude, these are merely my own speculation of the final events within 139 and although sad of its ending, my excitement for this final instalment knows no bounds. I can only wish for the best and I know Isayama will deliver.

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elizabeethan · 3 years

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Spaces Between Us Chapter 11: Strong

The hardships of real life separated them six years ago, and Emma has been struggling to put that fact behind her ever since. But then, only after she’s convinced herself that she’s moved on and that her new life is enough, Killian Jones comes back.

A Captain Swan Modern AU

A/N: Oh no my hand slipped and I posted early again

This chapter was hard to write, and it might be hard to read. Some heavy stuff happens so please take care of yourself and read the warnings! As always, if you need more information, please please message me.

***This chapter includes a scene containing descriptions of domestic violence. Please message me for more details if you need to***

Thank you, as usual, to my beta and friend @the-darkdragonfly, and to @donteattheappleshook and @xhookswenchx for listening to my ramblings and helping me figure out the plot to this <3

Read the Rest

Read on Ao3

Read my Other Stuff

~~~~

If there’s one thing Killian was not expecting when he woke up this morning, it was this. In fact, this has been the furthest thought from his mind for months. When Emma assured him that Henry is not his son, he believed her and forced himself to drop it.

He would gladly raise her child as his own, if she would allow him to do so. He would help them to escape her abusive husband, getting them out of the state entirely if he could, and he would act as a father figure to her boy.

But when she walks towards him in the hospital that afternoon, her eyes bloodshot and her face red and swollen as she cries some more, he hears the last thing he’d ever expected to hear.

“They want to do DNA testing,” she tells him softly, her voice croaking and rough in the aftermath of her violent sobs. “A… a paternity test.”

“Emma…” he tries, but nothing else will come out.

“I’m sorry. The pulmonologist says there's no way this is from him being premature. It’s really bad, and he says it’s got to be genetic.”

“I know, love, but… I just thought…”

She's silent for a moment, and it’s as if she doesn’t even want to try and speak. Finally, she inhales deeply and forces out her explanation.

“The weeks before you left, we were fighting all the time. And then we would have sex to numb how much it hurt, and the whole time, I mean… I was bad about taking my pill. And once you left I was still bad about it, but… if I got the date of conception wrong…”

He nods, though he’s having trouble understanding her as the world feels blurry still. Despite his confusion, though, he runs his hands up and down along the length of her arms. “He’s still so small, though.”

“He was five pounds, eight ounces when he was born. Which is tiny, but Dr. Whale said that a stressful pregnancy can impact birthweight. And… I mean, I spent my pregnancy with Walsh. I lost you.”

Taking her hands in his, he squeezes and begs her to look into his eyes before he pulls her bottom lip from between her teeth and wipes away the tiny trace of blood left behind. “Love, are you sure about this?”

He watches as she begins to break again, the tears immediate and her breathing quickening until he pulls her in for a tight hug. “If this is true-- if you’re his dad-- that means I put him through this for no reason. What kind of a mother does that make me?”

Although he’s overcome with confusion and a difficulty accepting what seems more and more likely to be the truth, he’s also overcome with the need to comfort her. So he shushes her gently, kissing her head, and whispers, “you're the best mother in the world to him, my love. You did everything you could to protect him. If this is true, we can leave, and I'll be the best father I can to him. Together, we’ll make up for what he’s been through, I promise.”

“I don't want to do this to you,” she cries, and although she grips him tightly, he can feel her pulling away. “I don’t want to put you through this.”

“There’s nothing I want more than to be a family with you and Henry. Even if he isn’t my son, I'm going to get you out of Storybrooke and I'm going to treat him like he is.”

She holds onto him for a while, letting her breathing even out and probably deciding whether he’s telling the truth, and he considers the weight of their situation. He never thought he would be a father. Once things ended with Emma, he thought it was over for him and that he would never move on and be happy enough to start a family with anyone else. Then, when he found her again and with a child of her own, he thought he would at least be happy enough raising someone else’s son if it meant being with her. When she so firmly and believably insisted that he did not father her son, he believed her and tried his best to move on.

Now that the possibility is dangled in front of him once more, he isn't sure he can survive the heartbreak of being proven wrong once again.

But when he thinks about the lad who has Killian’s mother’s eyes and Emma’s round cheeks and an attitude that couldn’t possibly be inherited from such a horrible man, his heart clenches in his chest and he can’t bear to not know. He can’t go through life without knowing whether this child is his. He wants him to be his so very badly. And even if he isn’t… he may as well be.

“What do we need to do, love?” he finally asks, giving her assurance that he’s in this with her no matter what they find out.

She sniffles, looking up at him with glassy red eyes and asks, “are you sure?” and he nods with firm resolve and a soft smile. She returns it and explains, “they can do a paternity test right now. I can pay for rapid results and find out in a few hours.”

Brushing the hair out of her face and tucking it behind her ear, he nods again and leans down to kiss her despite the fact that they're in public. They're hidden in a quiet hallway, but the possibility that anyone can walk in on them in each other’s arms is real. “I’ll pay.”

“Killian, no--”

He cuts her off with another kiss, this one more heated, and then says, “I’ll pay. However the results come back, I want to be here for the lad. I’ve missed five years already, let me start making that up now.”

She sighs and kisses him now, holding him as close to her as she can as she cradles the back of his head in her hands. “Should we talk about what this means?” she asks softly, voice barely above a whisper in the quiet hall.

“All it means is that a part of me may have been with you all along. I can take comfort in that. It means I have a reason for being so fond of your son, other than him being your son. It means there’s hardly any reason for us to be apart ever again.”

“Aside from my potential murder,” she jests, although it feels heavier than any joke should.

“Hush,” he quiets. “I told you I'm not letting anything happen to you and I meant it. We’re going to get this sorted out now, alright?” She nods, her nose running along his cheek. “Now, are they going to stab me with a needle, or can they simply swab my cheek?”

With a snort, she asks, “what, you can handle a bunch of tattoos, but a bit of blood work is too much for you?”

“Oy,” he argues, tickling her playfully until she giggles and buries her face in his neck. “I’ll do anything for that lad, I swear. Just… a cheek swab is a bit less uncomfortable.”

“I’m sure a cheek swab would’ve been less uncomfortable than 39 hours of labor, too.”

“Alright,” he concedes. “Come, now. Let’s find out the level of torture I’m about to endure.”

~~~~

It’s hours of sitting behind the desk, torturously staring at the clock and willing it to turn to 8 pm so she can leave. Tink doesn’t deserve this shift; it’s a complete waste of a day, and hardly anything exciting has happened. One would think that the emergency department at a hospital would be more busy, but Storybrooke is a small and sleepy town. The only thing that’s happened today is a little boy getting checked in for his asthma, and if nothing transpires with what was discovered after he was admitted, it’ll feel like a wasted shift.

As if his ears were burning, the elevator opens to reveal something very exciting indeed: the mayor. He hurries towards her, leaning over the desk with a sense of urgency that Tink suspects is purely for attention and votes. “I’m looking for Henry Oswald,” he insists.

She blinks at him and cocks her head, turning to her computer for show, although she already knows what’s about to happen. “Do you have ID?” she asks when she sees the kid’s chart, concealing her smirk.

The mayor grumbles something about her not knowing who he is and the slightly sadistic side of her cackles. The cackling gets louder when she takes his ID and shakes her head, giving him a falsely apologetic look. “I’m sorry, sir, I can only allow family into his room.”

His face is nearly unreadable, but she sees the way his eyes widen threateningly when he asks, “excuse me?” in a deceptively calm tone.

Not falling for his playacting, she repeats, “only family is allowed in the room at this time.”

“I’m his father,” he insists.

Tink shakes her head. “Not according to his chart, sir. The name on your ID does not match the name listed here.”

“Let me see that.”

“I can’t, sir, it’s a confidential medical record. Only his parents are allowed to see his information.”

He slams his hands against the desk and shouts, “I’m his father! What the hell is wrong with you?!”

Honestly, Tink should work on her tendencies to rile people up. But when she heard about the drama with the mayor’s son not actually being the mayor’s son, she was sort of hoping this would happen. She didn’t vote for him, anyway. “Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to lower your voice and take a step back.”

“I’m not lowering anything until you let me see the kid!”

“Sir, I’ll have to have you escorted out by security,” she insists, pressing the button under her desk discretely and watching the security guards rush into the waiting area.

The mayor shouts in anger as he’s hauled away, threatening to sue the hospital and insisting that Tink is infringing on his rights as a father. She smiles softly at the image she saw earlier, of a small boy sleeping away in his big bed and his father diligently guarding him from his firm, uncomfortable chair.

~~~~

Killian wanted to go for her after finding out the truth about Henry-- the fact that Walsh isn’t his father and Killian is-- but she was terrified of leaving him alone for even a second without the protection of the sheriff, so she insisted on going. He didn’t take that lying down and made her promise to stay in the hospital where it’s safe, so when he fell asleep in the hard folding chair, she kissed his forehead and snuck out of the room and down to his car.

It’s strange how easily she’s been able to accept the events of the day. It started with her having a mental breakdown over her husband’s maltreatment of both herself and her son, and has evolved into her feeling a sense of completion. Things are starting to feel right. Her life is falling into place.

Killian is Henry’s father.

She can continue to stress over the fact that she was too consumed by the pain of losing him to even consider the possibility later, but for now, she focuses on getting as many of Henry’s things as she can and stashing them in Killian’s squad car before she goes back to the hospital to be with her son. Killian can bring all of his stuff to his apartment later, so that she doesn’t waste any more time being away from him or being in this damn house.

She smiles as she grabs his favorite stuffed animal, Mr. Quackie, and pushes it into his small backpack before reaching for his nebulizer and placing that inside as well. She grabs Goodnight Moon and his favorite copy of Henry and Mudge, and just as she’s reaching for the rest of his clothes that she has laid out on his bed, she hears the front door slam.

In a panic, she shoves his clothes into the duffle bag as quickly as she can and zips it up, but she isn’t sure how she’ll be able to leave the house without him knowing. The squad car is parked outside, and while she was initially worried about taking it for fear of Killian getting into trouble, she’s glad she has it now. Maybe if he thinks the Sheriff is here, he won’t do anything. Maybe she can climb out the window without being seen, sneaking back in the front to grab the keys from the kitchen and making a break for it. She doesn’t need any of her own things, just the contents of the small backpack slung over her shoulder.

Just as she makes the rash decision to head out the window, hoping that the roof below the second story will be enough to ease her to the ground, she feels a hand on her shoulder yanking her back inside until she’s on her back and looking up. She’s never seen him look so angry-- she’s never seen anyone look so angry. He glares down at her through fury and rage and she fears what’s to come.

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” he asks simply, seething through his teeth as she gulps and attempts to stand. He stops her by pressing the toe of his boot, still wet from the snow outside, to her forehead. “I said what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“Um--”

“I just left the hospital. The school called, and when I got there, they said only Henry’s family can go into his room.”

She tries not to dwell on the fact that the school called him because she knows that they were required to do so. She also tries to ignore the fact that he waited almost eight hours before going to the hospital to look for Henry, able to put the thoughts of anger out of her mind and replace them with relief at him not being the father of her child. All she can do now is gulp and stare up at him in anticipation for what he might do to her.

He removes his boot and lets her stand, and just when he steps to the side and she’s tricked into thinking that he may let her leave, he throws her onto the small bed and screams, “his family?! How convenient is it that the hospital thinks someone else is Henry’s father?”

“Walsh,” she tries, but he’s on her before she can go on, pressing his forearm to her throat to silence her with just enough force for it to hurt.

“And now you're here, in the sheriff’s car,” he hisses, spit spewing across her face as he berates her. “If you tell me he isn’t mine-- if you stuck me with this life for six miserable years for absolutely no reason-- I will fucking kill you right here.”

She lets out a sound that should indicate the damage he’s doing as he increases the pressure of his hold, and he lets go only long enough to replace his arm with two hands. He squeezes hard until she starts to see stars, clinging her hands to his wrists in an attempt to claw him away from her and open up her airways again. Instead of letting go, he lifts her by the neck and throws her back down against the bed with more force than she knew was possible. He screams some more, but her world is going dark and she can’t make out a word he says to her.

Her lips start to feel numb at the pressure he applies. Her eyes feel like they’re going to pop out of her skull. Her desperate movements at his hands weaken, and she truly believes that he means to kill her. He means to end her life as punishment for falsely saddling him with fatherhood. She has the realization that she’s about to pass out and probably die, and then sees her son’s face flashing before her eyes and is reminded of why she’s here. Not just why she’s in his room gathering his things, but why she’s here on this earth. What purpose she serves as a person.

She’s a mother.

No one can take that from her.

No one.

She lifts her hands from his, finding one last grain of strength, just enough to plunge her pointer fingers into his eyes and make him scream in painful anguish as he finally releases his hold on her. She takes the deepest breath she ever has and ever will again, and feels more sympathy for Henry than she ever has before because nothing has ever been scarier than wanting to inhale and being incapable of doing so.

Walsh cries out, swearing at her and calling her names before he throws her onto the floor, causing her to lose the wind in her lungs once more. But she’s committed to fighting back now, and she won’t let him win, so she kicks him hard between his legs so that he falls beside her and then moves to stand herself.

Grabbing the small backpack, the one that at least has his nebulizer in it, she feels Walsh's hands grabbing for her ankles as she starts to run. She makes it down the stairs and grabs the keys off of the counter, wishing she had just kept them with her, when he cuts her off. He raises the stakes, too, because he’s standing three feet from her with a gun she had no idea he owned and a wild, murderous glint in his eyes.

“Are you gonna shoot me?” she asks, her throat and neck burning as she speaks.

“I really, really want to.”

“What about your reelection?” she taunts.

“Fuck you.”

She glances around the room as she stares down the barrel of his gun, and realizes she isn’t scared. It’s the icing on the cake, the fact that he’s had a gun in the house that her five-year-old lives in the entire time and never bothered to tell her. She’s furious.

So she picks up the crystal vase on the counter and he laughs, asking what she’s going to do with it when he’s standing there with a gun to her head, and she tosses it at him. It’s his grandmother’s, and he wouldn’t dare let a family heirloom shatter, so he drops the gun and catches the vase. She grabs his golf club as she runs by the bag he’d left by the entrance of the kitchen, holding it like a bat as he turns to face her again.

“You’re not his dad,” she confirms finally, her strength giving way to the cocky attitude that she’s been wanting to give him for months. Years. “The sheriff is. And I’ve been fucking him for months.”

He growls in the back of his throat, grumbling something about her being a bitch, and rushes her foolishly. She swings the golf club with all of the force that she possesses and knocks him and the crystal vase to the ground, taking a deep grounding breath when he remains still, and then hurrying towards the door.

~~~~

She parks outside of the sheriff’s station, unsure of what to do next. She knows he can’t do anything to her here, and she doesn’t want to go to the hospital where Henry could see her. She also doesn’t want to let Killian see her like this, because he was right all along.

She always thought that a part of Walsh must've loved her, just a bit. She thought that he would never hurt her, because she’s his wife, and that’s just not how things are done. Killian was right, and she should have known better.

She remembers hearing a statistic in college, back when she wanted to be a social worker, about how battered women are in the most danger when they try to leave their abuser. She never for a second saw herself becoming a statistic.

~~~~

The sheriff’s car had been parked outside for twenty minutes before Deputy Ruby Lucas decided to take a peek and investigate why he wasn’t coming inside. When she finally does look, she sees something she would never have expected.

Of course, she figured out they were having an affair pretty easily. It’s not like they were being discreet about it, after all. But Ruby never suspected that the sheriff would lend his town-appointed vehicle to his mistress.

She likes the mayor’s wife well enough, even more so upon finding out how little she regards her husband. The man’s an absolute terror and she’s never liked him, and always struggled with how someone could possibly have found enough good in that man to marry him. Of course, finding out that Emma doesn’t actually like her husband very much was a bit of a pleasant surprise.

She taps on the window on the drivers side and the woman inside jumps, staring up at Ruby with wide eyes filled with terror. “Are you alright?” Ruby asks her through the glass, and she watches as Emma grimaces as she turns her head to face forward again. Suddenly and with great clarity, Ruby’s astute deputy skills kick into gear as she notices a deeper-than-normal shadow on the woman’s neck and realizes what’s happening. “Where’s the sheriff?” she asks.

Emma says, “the hospital,” although her voice is rough and sounds strained.

Ruby wants to turn on her flashlight and take a better look at the woman before her, but thinks better of it so as to not spook her. She leans down so that she’s more on her level and says, “can you come inside with me? We can call him.”

She watches as the frightened woman reaches her hand up to her neck and cringes away from her own touch before undoing her seatbelt and exiting the car, her eyes wide and fearful as she looks around the empty parking lot.

Ruby has never seen someone look so terrified in all her years as deputy.

~~~~

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