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maxphilippa · 3 months

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i think that the major misinterpretation that people have with taco is that she didn't get attached to mic because of her sad face in the end wanted to show regret because "she hurted her friend". like. no, she wasn't sad because she regretted what she did. she was sad because she's alone again, but she knows very well at the end that she had it coming. the reason as to why taco was so desperate of wanting mic to tell her that she did gain something is because. she SAW pickle in mic, but of course their situation is very different. "Oh but Taco couldn't have done what she did to Mic to Pickle, Mic was fully aware" but she did do that. Mic herself says it. That is pretty much what II is telling you. Taco isn't a good friend, and is not exactly a good person either. Mic was aware that Taco was/is a bad person, but Mic's nature makes her believe in whoever acknowledges her. Taco made Mic feel like she needed her, just the way she made Pickle feel back in s1.

she didn't really change thanks to mic. her faces of "regret" aren't her actually lamenting all of the stuff she did to microphone, but rather just her realizing that she proved what everyone said about her as a result. i will give it to that she might've tried to change, but not because of mic. she wanted to win the prize so she could prove others wrong on her being a loser and a coward, by being a loser and a coward. if anything, mic made her realize that she hasn't changed. she pretty much just ruined everything for everyone who saw her as a friend, and for herself.

taco's whole arc is constantly just downgraded to questionable takes and listen. i do agree that she is heavily flawed as a character. she is morally gray, but ii doesn't portray her as a good person with good intentions, nor she should be really be treated as if she was. neither she had those good intentions with mic at all, i mean, their "friendship" pretty much started because of taco wanting the prize money, taking a part of microphone's prize if she made mic won, you know, an offer. she would get the prize and mic would get recognition. but everyone seems to forget that probably, the main reason as to why she's doing all of this, is because she does regret how she acted on s1. she doesn't exactly regret doing all of that to microphone, and even if she does, it's for the wrong reasons. (that's because she did the exact same thing to you know, pickle, her once best friend, the only person she truly ever cared about)

people do tend to forget that taco keeps sending letters to pickle, and that's often just used for pickle angst and making it his only character trait, but. it's not that. it's the fact that taco keeps on writing those letters, despite fully knowing that she did hurt pickle because of her actions. taco's biggest flaw is that she can't accept that she has ruined everything and wants so desperately to be back on pickle's life because she ended up caring about him deeply as a person. as a friend. but she was never there at all, either.

taco can't seem to understand that she has hurted people badly. sure, she seemed like a "friend" to microphone, and you can argue whatever you want but a fact is that taco IS smart, and she knew that the only way to possibly keep mic by her side is pretending to want to be better, you know, the same way she pretended to be just a odd fella so pickle and her could remain together and have an advance at the game. she played with both of them. because both pickle and mic believed in her but were just used by her for the game.

however, taco does seem to regret the way everything went during-post s1. you can see how she yearns for another chance and is saddened about not getting it, but that's not only for comedic purposes, but that's because the writing is telling you that she won't get a second chance. at least not here.

what i want people to understand is that, yes, taco is a complex character, however trying to sugarcoat what she did is pretty much missing the point of her writing as a whole. she isn't a good person neither was she a good friend. she hasn't grown because she was never able to let go of something that she thinks that she can fix with some words and a prize. she thinks that she can still fix her friendship with pickle, she thinks that she can clear her name (even if she was the one who tainted it), but she only ended up proving knife right. she proved everyone right. she hasn't changed. a morally gray character is that. they're not exactly fully bad or fully good, but it's taco's actions that speak a lot. words are cheap, and taco's title is "The Liar", and that says a lot, because she kept on lying to microphone and to pickle on both of their games. she won't heal unless she lets go.

and i want to be clear here: i do think that taco can go through redemption. i do think that taco can become a better person, but not in the way people portray her to do so. because it just pretty much goes against what her arc has settled in for us, and the other arcs that were involved in hers as well.

taco's arc is meant to be somewhat a parallel with nickel's in a way. hell, even with knife's arc if anything. she treats knife as a simple bully, but when she saw that he became smarter and way more emotionally aware than what she had expected, she felt attacked by that, because he was stable. he became a better person and he was rubbing that on her, and it made her feelings of anger way worse regarding him, but it is true. knife is pretty much everything that taco wants to be, but here's the thing that made them so different:

knife stayed. taco didn't stay.

knife is accepted by everyone in the hotel because meanwhile he hasn't explicitly said that he had a change of heart, he has shown it through actions and a big difference too is that he was there for pickle, even if they weren't close in s1, and taco is on the woods because deep down she is aware that she can't go back. not if she doesn't have something to offer as an direct apology, but here's the problem. whether or not she got the prize, she still wouldn't get forgiven by anyone due to what she said that day.

again. her problem is not being able to let go and to accept when she has messed up badly. she has been lying to everyone but she has also been lying to herself as a whole. she can't keep on doing this because it's just hurting everyone and herself. keeping grudges and holding onto past friendships that were doomed to fall is just hurting her. she is not on the state to keep on trying, she wasn't at all ever.

taco's arc most likely will have closure on a way that fits her character, and i feel like that would be with her letting go of inanimate insanity as a whole and of what she can't fix anymore. her trying to find herself after years of lying to everyone and to herself. she's not a good person. but she can become one. only if she knows what she did was wrong and that her second chance isn't there, and never will be, and if she recognizes that meanwhile she did that damage, she can still become a better person. just not there.

pickle and mic don't owe her anything, especially pickle. taco does owe them an apology, but they won't accept that. the least she could do is to accept their wishes, understand that she needs to leave them and grow to be a better person. maybe, if she does that, she would actually heal.

she doesn't need anyone to fix her. she needs to fix herself.

#inanimate insanity #ii #inanimate insanity invitational #ii 2 #ii 3 #inanimate insanity taco #inanimate insanity microphone #inanimate insanity knife #inanimate insanity pickle #and no. this isn't to bring ship discourse or anything. get that away from my character analysis.#i feel like taco is a really interesting character. it is pretty sad that even if she's popular people don't get her #“she's a complex fem character” yes she is. however you are pretty much missing the point. a character regardless of the gender can do bad-#-things and have a good intention/or a way to try to make up for that in their actions. however she is a case where she can't get closure w #-ith anyone because of the way she is written/the way she was given that complexity. she won't get closure with anyone in the cast at all #because they won't really forgive her since she kept on lying and using them as puppets. she had a change of heart. sure #but that doesn't erase all the pain she has caused #i genuinely do hope she gets her eventual closure by letting go. she does deserve to be okay but not with the cast.#i feel like the best way to put is. she had a good wish (wanting to become friends with pickle and showing that she changed)#with bad intentions and bad actions (using mic to get the prize + lying to her + other bad stuff she has done to the contestants such as h #-arming them without a motive/just because.)#max does analysis

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platoniccereal · 7 months

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some notes on the wanderer/scaramouche's characterisation~

i first and foremost made this for myself since every time i touched upon the wanderer's speech something felt amiss. but i also hope these notes may be of help to any content creator in their characterisation of our favourite an-emo boy!

while writing these notes i went through phrases scaramouche/the wanderer utters to establish his choice of words and thoughts that may be hidden behind them! i also provided utterances themselves for almost every point i made so that his speech can be copied easier. besides, i tried to guess how this can be utilised in our head canons! :)

please keep in mind that these are still my notes of something that stood out to me, not absolutely everything. additionally, i still may misinterpret something + our interpretation may be different + you can see something as a stretch. that's ok! also, i listened to the english va + i speak of the balladeer and the wanderer as Two Different hypostases of a character, not the same continuous character.

hope you find it helpful!

INVERSION OF GENESIS.

★ when the balladeer/the wanderer is angry, he rarely raises his voice. he starts to whisper and even speak softer instead (it's about the english voice, but afaik it's also true for other voices, too). when he wants an emphasis on certain words, he whispers, too. this isn't true for battles, though, as he is very loud in his wanderer and shouki no kami hypostases.

★ his usual sarcastic structure is to state something he'd expect and then illustrate that someone is acting against it (as in, stupid). e.g. «ah, so if it were up to you, you'd finish the job? guess i had you all wrong. there i was thinking you were just getting cold feet,» «it's not every day you see people questioning the god of wisdom's judgment. just when you think you've seen it all.»

★ when he wants to threaten a person or make them do something, he isn't necessarily uses imperative sentences. he uses «i'd like you to» in «in return, i'd like you to answer a question for me» and still gets what he asks for. other examples are his «so why don't you relax your guard a little?» «let's cut each other a little slack, shall we?» and «so maybe you should think about backing off a little.»

as illustrated, instead of describing painful consequences, he undermines them instead. («a little» is his favourite word, it seems.) as evident later, it is coupled with his, err, laid back attitude towards threats to him. basically, he just lets people act stupid and walk into his traps.

from what we've seen from dottore, he also uses the same structure: «i suggest you keep your true feelings to yourself.» maybe, he was the one scaramouche copied.

★ overall, his sarcasm is what you'd usually see from people. it should be kept in mind that sarcasm is his initial response and he will use it as often as possible even if he could simply explain. there won't be any examples here, though, as there would be too many. but his conversations with nahida, paimon and signora illustrate it well. i believe sarcasm is his way to assert power since it builds on «common knowledge + the inversion of that» hence implying the opponent doesn't have this common knowledge -> they are stupid, he is not.

★ he is extremely professional and focused on completing the task successfully. he knows how operations (which the traveller suggests he was assigned when he was the harbinger) are carried out and follows the strict algorithm. e.g. «(to nahida) we will now proceed to the heart of irminsul», «permission to begin searching for information?»

he isn't easily swayed when he works and tries to get this attitude out of the traveller and paimon, too, just asking them not to fall behind.

★ he follows the agreement with nahida: how they will walk into the irminsul and what his tasks will be. he completes them without any chatter and keeps nahida updated as he should. even after the revelation about the tatarasuna's history, he still is able to proceed with his task.

★ «you can't have your prisoner knowing too much,» «i understand that prisoners have to put up with harassment from the guards,» it may be a stretch, but from these sentences + how he talks about his relationships with the fatui i can conclude that he easily justifies abuse towards himself. the balladeer/the wanderer isn't the person who just lets people do that, but whenever abuse happens, he easily explains it by the natural order of things and weaklings suffering from the strong ones because they deserve it. hence, whenever he ends up being the weak one, he believes he deserves this abuse. this can seep through into in his further interactions with people who care about him should any fight occur.

★ «sometimes it's you using them, other times it's them using you.» it comes in a direct parallel to niwa's words about dottore's attitude towards kabukimono: people of tararasuna didn't want to use him, hence it's the doctor who altered scaramouche's perception of human relationships. the balladeer/the wanderer believes in mutual gain and uses it to: 1) get what he wants from the traveller, 2) pay back for nahida and the traveller's help.

thus, it's safe to conclude he uses this principle as a moral compass in every social interaction he comes across. he could use this law to navigate his personal life instead of his emotions.

★ «most of human relationships are this way… certainly the stable ones are.» it is easier for him to predict when he stops being valuable to someone and toss other people out when they are not useful to him, so there is no sudden abandonment. it is easy to see how it corresponds with his trauma. this principle gives him the illusion of control since he can calculate everything, and gaining control over situations that may lead to the repeated trauma is a response real abuse survivors have. hence, it's safe to conclude the wanderer will try to find what other person gains in his more sincere relationships and, what's worse, may use other people who care about him out of habit since it's a natural order for him.

★ even though he earned the reputation of someone who doesn't bite his tongue when he should he doesn't backtalk or lie when it isn't beneficial to him.

★ he admits to managing «cordial conversations», so while the wanderer may avoid participating in small talks at all, it isn't unreal to picture him having one and not imploding. this is also something confirmed by his first appearance in the unreconciled stars event where he handles a friendly conversation perfectly - so the friendliness is just something he knows (and studied intently as kabukimono) but ignores on purpose. social skills are there.

★ the balladeer and possibly the wanderer, too, is sadistic in a classical sense of the word. he admits to enjoying stomping on the pests, meaning bringing pain and destruction to people. this can also be confirmed by one of the husk of the opulent dream's pieces. there, it is stated that «he also loved watching expressions of terror and helplessness play across human faces, and it was perhaps precisely because of this imbecilic underling's expressiveness that he had kept them around.» as the balladeer, he let some of his subordinates stay not because of their usefulness, but because they were funny to abuse. (also. hot.)

thus, it can be possible that in a less hostile environment of the akademiya the wanderer can struggle with this side of himself, hurting people on purpose. this can also become something he has to fight in relationships with people he cares about.

★ before his memories are restored the wanderer is polite and reserved. he apologises, calls his boss properly and tries to do his part. we can notice the similar behaviour of the balladeer but weaponised to imitate friendliness (e.g. unreconciled stars). there isn't any features of a classical shy character, he doesn't stutter or use abrupt phrases.

★ «i ran into him out in the wilderness during the storm, and he let me take shelter in his cart. in return, i said i'd be his helper for a while.» even before he gets his memories back and remembers principles the fatui likely taught him, the wanderer navigates his relationships with others through understanding what he gets and what he must give in return.

it is clear that he spent some time in the shop already and made enough work to make the merchant uncomfortable for exploiting him. thus, the «for a while part» isn't quite true. the wanderer has nowhere to go so he has every intention to pay back more than he needs to, to just stay somewhere.

hence, he can continue using this principle in his relationships with others, creating a conflict where he is dead set on paying back with little to no regard for his own feelings.

★ «i don't deserve your protection.» it seems that even before he restores his memories and is only told about his sins, the wanderer already despises himself enough to reject help. this attitude may exist later, when the wanderer restored his memories, with an added «i'm not that weak» but this is only my speculation.

however, this phrase may be another example of him carefully weighing what others give to him and what he should return.

★ «(uttered by the jester) what you are, truly, is a weapon, one that can be wielded with an iron will…» to further ingrain the thought that the balladeer is a tool, not a person, the jester proposes the idea of seeing himself as a weapon to kunikuzushi. coupled with dottore saying someone will eventually use kabukimono, it seems this was the strategy that was used to keep the balladeer in the harbinger ranks.

thus, we can see that the balladeer continued to suffer abuse due to 1) his beliefs in the strong dominating the weak, 2) his illusions that he is a person shattered by events of tararasuna, hence he perceives himself as an object, a weapon that must endure. the latter is a bit of a speculation but i don't think it is far off the mark:

★ «now that i've had a taste of just about every flavour in this world, i've found that actually… bitterness is the one i like best,» and the whole bitterness discussion in the teapot are the example of him pushing himself to his limits in order to being able to handle the true bitterness of life. (also, it lies in a nice parallel with ei/shogun's «illusions shattered» thing, but i diverge.)

★ «(uttered by the jester) or, you could continue to drift aimlessly.» another tactic fatui used to win kabukimono over was his obvious lack of any goals and place to go. we can see that the wanderer finds himself in a similar position, staying with the merchant because he had nowhere to go. long time ago, the balladeer stayed for these very reasons with much, much more dangerous people than a common merchant.

★ «i'm harsh on myself and everybody else.» while the former comes from the low self-esteem and believing himself to be weak, the wanderer also won't be patient with anyone's blunders. i suspect especially if it's about someone in his charge or if it's about work. i also suspect that an easy way to get on his good-ish side is to act this way as well and not let any mistakes slide.

★ «utility to others is what makes me worth.» as soon as his memories were implemented into him, he is reverted back to his harsh principles ingrained into him by the fatui. it seems there isn't any other tool he could use to measure his worth. the base principle that any life is worth something does not exist for someone who didn't see himself as an alive being for several past centuries.

hence, it can lead to reckless behaviour driving him to his limits which will cause stress to someone who cares about him.

★ «oh right… i almost forgot. you're the good guys. you're into justice and all that.» this is his answer to the traveller trying to argue with how the wanderer sees his own worth. i believe there's some division between what he thinks good guys deserve/what the wanderer himself deserves. thus, while it is possible he will agree that life's worth is life itself after some long argument, he still won't apply this to himself. i believe it's a somewhat common coping mechanism to think «people don't deserve X, but i deserve X.» (i'm not talking about his crimes, btw.)

★ «no nonsense. i like it.» he approves when the traveller doesn't argue with the «let them stab the blades into my chest if they so desire. maybe that's how it always should have been.» while the wanderer might need support in his life and changing his self-destructive perspective might be of great help to him, it seems he still wouldn't appreciate a direct approach to that.

VOICE LINES.

★ one of the most consistent features of the wanderer is despising the idle chatter, as evident in this idle voice line, «it's rather pathetic to force a conversation just to occupy silence.» another example is the husk of opulent dream's description: «the youth, hating chatty humans the most, gave his subordinate a backhand slap.»

so, the balladeer/the wanderer despises small talk even if he can participate in one. he would likely appreciate people who are just focused on the task and don't say anything that isn't related to their common goal at the moment. perhaps, it can be used to form a wordless bond between him and people who hang out with him.

it seems that he is quite harsh in his criteria for the idle chatter since his subordinate asks quite a normal question of where the harbinger is heading next.

★ looking through every voice line about other people, it can be argued that the wanderer's initial algorithm to describe someone is to trash them. but i believe we should also remember most of his voice lines are about the harbingers, and he's never had particularly warm feelings towards his colleagues. other four are yae miko and raiden shogun, and he isn't fond of them both, and kazuha and nahida. last two are the only people he doesn't despise, and these voice lines are pretty tame, while not an open praise.

★ «i have no need for food. save me the trouble and take care of yourself and that small thing floating next to you.» this can be perceived both as him not wanting the traveller getting in his way like the balladeer's subordinates, or genuine, poorly expressed care. thus, the wanderer may say dubious phrases with that intention whenever he expresses his care.

★ «so, you're still stewing over our run-ins from before? huh. well, what are you going to do about it? take your time. i'm in no hurry.» the wanderer's attitude to threats is quite unique. other examples of that are his lines from the trailer, where he answers «sure i will» and «i look forward to that» to the threat that he will pay for his attitude. also, «fine by me – come one, come all, i say. as a matter of fact, i'm somewhat looking forward to it.»

basically, you can read his behaviour as «you can be stupid enough trying to attack me, and i won't stop humans from being stupid, and the outcome is their fault.» it's basically all over his trailer where he waits until the fatui attack first.

★ when it comes to answering for his sins, though, i would rather see it as accepting his punishment. it is also evident in his falling voice line, «the price for my sins.»

★ «the gods aren't guided by any kind of rationality or moral compass. haven't i shown that to you already?» i believe he doesn't mean ei or nahida here, two archons he is connected with, because he didn't show us anything in regard to them. (we dealt with problems with them ourselves) what he might mean is shouki no kami. this also may be evident in his battle ost and, «(about his actions) after all, gods have never been needed to be reasonable.» so this phrase may indicate irony he feels regarding his actions as an archon.

★ overall, it seems that he's rather profiling everybody for us rather than giving his pure opinion.

★ «anger, whether it be from others or myself, is too convenient and useful as a tool.» while the balladeer went as far as becoming a god only to become emotionless, he now learns an actually legitimate way to deal with anger. the first step to do it is to learn that anger is a normal emotion and how to channel it instead. thus, he can also learn this about other emotions and that each one of them is ok. knowing he uses the utility of everything as a compass, the utility of emotions may be something that will help him accept them.

★ «don't you know that's only asking for trouble?» coupled with the phrase from his birthday letter, «has she ever stopped to think about what an «experience» it is for others to meet me?» it is apparent that while behaving highly unsociable due to detest for idle chatter, he also wants to shelter others from his presence since he believes it is nothing pleasant. i believe he also thinks it will only bring suffering in the end – to them.

★ «it's not so much that i have nothing to say… i just have nothing fun or positive to share,» explains another reason he avoids conversations – he just doesn't believe himself to be someone people would usually have as an opponent.

★ «if you don't mind, perhaps… we could sit here together for a while,» coupled with «the scenery here should be quite breathtaking» from his birthday voice line lets me think that his favourite quality time with others is to peacefully enjoy some scenery (he truly is a cat who just likes to be in someone's presence).

★ «are you so dumb as to have forgotten that i'm not human?» this is a less useful observation but i find it rather funny that he is annoyed not by the fact that the traveller may try to poison him but by the fact that they chose an ineffective method. if we wanna extract something useful, though, it can be said that if the traveller tries to kill him and fairly wins, he is ok with that as he is the weak one in this situation. but that's quite a stretch.

★ «i can see the great deal of effort you put forth,» «thank you for trying to look out for me. go get some rest,» and «it's generous of you to host me in your home. the least i could do is be grateful,» show pretty clearly that even after the wanderer restored his memories he is still able to express gratitude without exploding, and i don't believe he finds it useful to be mean when it isn't of any need.

★ «hey, you own this place. what are you so nervous about? it's not a good look,» coupled with «look at me, coming around here, criticizing your lifestyle choices.» everybody noticed how nice the wanderer is in the serenitea pot (as shown in the previous point). but this also reveals that while he enjoys being painfully straightforward and kept people around just because they suffered prettily, he doesn't enjoy when at least the traveller doesn't put up any fight. maybe it's about the subordinate/the equal difference. basically, he seems to respect people with strong personal boundaries. the ones who don't try to justify their own home where he is just a guest, at least. that would be logical since it's evident he navigates his life through «weak/strong» division.

★ «this is your home. arrange it as you wish,» this and previous voice lines illustrate once again that he isn't unnecessarily mean, at least not all the time. he understands the dynamics of a place he is in and how to be a grateful guest instead of shitting on every player's choice.

★ «the fact that things didn't work out doesn't make my past self a fool for hoping in vain that they would, does it?» and «you're a god. do you think i'm evil?» depending on whether we see the former as rhetoric or not, this may show that even though he is quite old, he still looks for guidance whenever it comes to more vulnerable topics. he looks for this guidance in people he respects, such as the traveller and nahida. and at least with nahida, he listens intently because the answer truly matters to him. maybe, if there wasn't any mechanic restrictions, he would listen to the traveller, too.

PRE-IOG SCENES.

★ «for just a small price, they get the feeling of controlling the world. trading their life for supreme power… pretty good deal, don't you think?» there isn't much to analyse as the utterance is pretty clear, but i just find it funny because this is what he ended up doing with shouki no kami. so either he fell into the same trap or he truly believed in what he said then and wasn't just mocking teppei.

★ «[haypasia] peered into my consciousness and saw my past. someone like that is qualified to become my first follower.» while this qualifies haypasia as a follower, having one also qualifies him as a god. but this can be perceived differently. haypasia saw his past and stayed devoted and didn't leave her god. it is my speculation, but this may be something scaramouche is after - this is a twisted form of acceptance. as the wanderer, he still may harbour such desire to be seen and accepted, leading him into healthy relationships or unhealthy obsessions. still, the whole haypasia sequence demonstrates that scaramouche is still a loyal individual, he just didn't have anyone to grant this loyalty.

★ on the same note, it should be said that scaramouche openly admits and expresses affection to haypasia. a mortal, a feeble human, mind you. because, of course, she is his first and only follower. thus, he can show such feelings honestly and without shying away if he deems it necessary, which might be useful for creating his future bonds with other people and maybe he will be much more open with them than we'd initially thought.

★ «has anyone ever told you that you're not good at sowing discord?» and «you're still too naive if you think a few words will be enough to convince me to destroy the doctor,» imply that before the revelation in 3.3, scaramouche wouldn't let just anyone get him on bad terms with the doctor and manipulate him into that no matter how much abuse by dottore he endured. no matter how bad his relationships with his colleges are, he will handle them himself. this is a note purely for me and my future writing of the wanderer, but it seems that even after 3.3 getting him out of the dottore's mental grasp will be a demanding task.

SMALLER DETAILS.

★ his idle emotion and his character picture are him smiling, so it isn't unusual for the wanderer to do it and even more natural - maybe, at least when he is alone.

★ whenever the wanderer finishes the task, he prefers to shortly say «done» without any chatter.

★ when it comes to speech, he doesn't divide his sentences much and uses compound, very complex ones freely. whenever he needs to explain something, if it isn't something he deems stupid, he does it fully and doesn't hold back.

★ scaramouche always calls nahida buer, perhaps as the way to show himself being above «demon gods», while the wanderer calls her lesser lord kusanali, which sounds more respectful as it is her title.

★ overall, i think the approach hoyo use for their characters is choosing one main characteristic (if you think about any character, you can remember One main thing about them) and then building their interactions around situations where it feature shows and situations where it is an exception and they act against it.

if we focus only on one type of these situations, we mischaracterise the character. thus, if we choose, say, the wanderer being mean as his main feature and focus on it, we miss out on times where it isn't true. for example, his respect for the traveller's realm or his desire to help others in a parade of providence. if we focus only on nice exceptions like that, we mischaracterise him as well.

updates:

★ now that we have both the second birthday story and his tcg lines, it appears to the wanderer is no stranger to doing something just to make someone happy. and then say it was only because he's got nothing to do. e.g., reading books someone recommended to him, «some vahumana students were trying to push some book recommendations onto me. i don't have anything else to do, so i'm just idly flipping through them» or playing a duel because he thinks it makes the traveler happy, «can a game like this really make you so happy? childish... if you want to play, then be quick about it,» «all smiles after winning a game like this? ha, so easy to satisfy,» «and the boring game is finally over... you happy now?»

#genshin impact #genshin #scaramouche #kabukimono #wanderer #genshin impact meta #writing #dottore #nahida #my post

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mimi-cee-genshin · 1 year

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Until You're Convinced - Subject Two x f!reader

Summary: Albedo is struck on Dragonspine and asks Subject Two to get help. But when he runs into you, your warmth causes him to fall for you. He knows your relationship can't last; you've mistaken him for Albedo. Yet, he continues to desire to be by your side, even if the one you long for isn't him.

Other Info: Subject Two/Fake Albedo/ Rubedo x f!reader, Albedo x reader (one-sided); fluff and angst with happy ending; 1.0k; lightly edited

Notes: Felt like sharing what's basically the outline of my Subject Two idea here. I don't think I have time to write this one even those I love this idea. Maybe one day.

*****

You have a crush on Albedo and you see him frantically running around Mondstadt looking for someone. You wonder what's wrong with him. He's actually Subject Two and he's looking for Lumine for help because Albedo is in trouble. He's currently in a sort of hibernation mode in Dragonspine so he won't lose control and destroy Mondstadt in the process.

When Subject Two comes back after finding Lumine, you offer him a meal and a rest after his long search. He's touched by your smile and the care that you give him – before he remembers he needs to pretend to be Albedo.

Your insecurities eat away at your insides. You think that Albedo is in love with Lumine because of how much he sought after her, and with a heavy heart, you admit to (Fake) Albedo that you're in love with him.

After that day, Subject Two runs into you often at the restaurant while he's working with Lumine and some of the Knights to help Albedo. You're still kind and friendly with him, but despite his aloof and slightly cynical personality, he can empathize with your unrequited love for Albedo because of his own unrequited familial love.

He often wants to see you because you radiate a warmth that he never experienced. Yet he knows you treat him this way because you think he's Albedo. As a result, he continues to act kind and friendly like Albedo would.

One day, you tell him you're going on vacation and plan to take a trip to Liyue. Surprisingly, Subject Two asks to come with you. (He tells himself it's not out of character for Albedo to ask this.)

You chat with him as you stroll through the streets of Liyue and you buy little souvenirs for people back in Mondstadt. You ask him when is his birthday, and he tells you he doesn't know, forgetting that he's supposed to be Albedo. You decide you can celebrate his birthday today and buy him a red scarf.

He's surprised you thought to give him a present. But because you misinterpret of his reaction, you ask if you shouldn't give it to him because he likes Lumine. Subject Two recalls how much Albedo talked about you and wouldn't be surprised if Albedo did love you back. He tells you that he likes you too.

From that day on, your relationship with each other grows. He gives you a necklace on your birthday in return for the scarf and you bring him along on your days off to wherever your feet would take you.

But Subject Two continues to deny the fact that he isn't really Albedo. He had pretended to be Albedo before, so why take his identity like he did before?

However, it had been years since he created that cryo whopper flower and he began to have a good relationship with Albedo after that. In fact, Albedo was the one who told Subject Two to pretend to be him while he was locked away on Dragonspine. He didn't want people like Klee to worry. Yet, Subject Two wanted to continue to be by your side, causing the turmoil inside his heart.

Lumine comes to Subject Two, telling him they've found a solution for Albedo. Knowing he can't continue with his relationship with you, he tells you that he needs to break up with you because soon he's going to forget everything that happened with you. You urge him to explain himself but he can't bear to tell you the truth that he wasn't Albedo. You were in love with Albedo, not him.

He disappears on you, telling you to forget him and you are left in despair. When Albedo returns to Mondstadt, he really doesn't know anything that happened between the two of you. But it's too hard for you to pretend as if those times together never existed.

Several months later, Subject Two is at Albedo's camp in Dragonspine. He's been hiding out in the mountain ever since. It's where he always lived anyway.

He opens the trunk full of his belongings, sees the red scarf you gave him and wraps it around his neck. You walk up from behind him and he stuffs the scarf in the trunk and closes it.

You say you recognize him and he admits it's true. He has met you once as Subject Two but he didn't really talk to you.

You say you wanted to see him, but he says you barely knew him. In a sense, it was true you never knew him. He pretended to be Albedo the whole time without showing his true personality. You tell him that you can start to get to know him now. He brushes you off and tells you to do whatever you want.

Little by little, you come to visit him on Dragonspine. And little by little, Subject Two would slip up on things he's not supposed to know about you until you finally tell him, "Albedo, never lost his memory, did he?"

He snaps at you and pretends he doesn't know what you're talking about. But he sees that you're wearing the necklace he gave you, hoping the Albedo you knew would come back. You ask him again if it was him, if he was the one you spent all that time with.

You tell him of all the things you missed about him and it dawns on him that you listed things related to his personality and not Albedo's. More and more of his personality slipped through the more he spent time with you and he didn't even notice.

At this point, Subject Two is still in denial that you'd still choose him over Albedo. "Then why is it that, after only meeting you a few times, I only think about you? You won't leave my mind," you tell him.

He finally gives up and tells you all about who he is. That he was a failed experiment. That he had tried to kill Albedo before. That Albedo was stuck in Mondstadt and asked him to take on his identity.

He doesn't know how to take all of this in. He doesn't understand why you'd want him over Albedo. So you tell him you'll stay by his side until he's convinced that you really do love him.

*****

I hope you liked this even if it's not a full fic like I usually do. Please check out my other fics if you enjoyed this one. :)

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acotar-taylorsversion · 2 months

Text

Just Because I Want This to Be Seen..

This is a response to a post about how Az just wants a mate and Elain doesn't want a mate and that's why she's avoiding Lucien. I thought about just reblogging it but I deleted it because it wasn't enough for me lol

Anyways.......

Azriel wants a mate, yes, because he is fae and he knows what having a mate means. He sees how happy his brothers are with their mates so how could he not want one. Cassian had even stated that he was jealous of Rhys at one point and nobody called him entitled? He is also questioning why 2 of his brothers were given 2 of the sisters that were Made by the cauldron and why the third was mated to someone else. It's a choice of words, not just thinking that Elain is "third." I understood what he meant perfectly and I don't blame him at all. After all the feelings he's been having towards Elain and the fact that she wants nothing to do with Lucien and was more than willing to give in to those same feelings with him, not her mate, Az has every right to question the cauldron. There is more than enough evidence throughout the series that suggests that Az acts more like Elain's mate than Lucien does. I would not be surprised if his lack of sleep, headaches, and overall broodiness is because of some type of bond with Elain that isn't being acknowledged because everyone is too concerned with her bond with Lucien. He's confused and he has every right to question everything.

And Elain has stated that she does not want a mate. Meaning she does not want Lucien. There is no "getting to know him" or "giving it a chance." She does not want it. She is and has been developing feelings towards Azriel. Even if Az is her mate and Lucien never was, Az would not have told her right a way. He would have let her get used to her new life and accept things, just like Rhys tried to do with Feyre and Cassian tried to do with Nesta. If you truly understood Az, then you would know this.

I am so sick and tired of people misinterpreting Az's character. He does not feel entitled to her. He cares for her and wants to protect her. What is so wrong with that? He doesn't feel worthy of her. He won't let him think of a future with her because he does not feel like he deserves her. He knows she is mated to someone else, but he can't stay away from her. He can't stop these feelings for her. Lucien, on the other hand, has no problem leaving and being gone for weeks at a time. I am so sick of hearing people say "Elain is confused, she doesn't know what she wants." She has made it very clear how she feels about having a mate and how angry she is at the fact that she has one. Lucien is the reason Grayson would not accept her back. He is apart of the most traumatic night of her life. She will never forget that and I don't think she will ever forgive him for that either. People need to accept that it looks like she was moving on from Grayson because of her feelings for Az, not Lucien.

After everything that is already canon about Elain and Lucien, if she chose the bond, it would not be for herself. I don't care what anyone says. She knows that Rhys needs all the alliances he can get with the Autumn Court. I would not be surprised if her returning that necklace meant that she was so hurt by what happened that she couldn't bear to look at a reminder of what could have been. She does not know that the only reason Az didn't kiss her was because of Rhys. That's the only reason he stopped. That's the only reason he FORCED HIMSELF TO SAY THAT IT WAS A MISTAKE. And, to be honest, this might push her to accept Lucien, because she thinks the one person who she wanted to move on with doesn't want her and she's going to settle for Lucien to make everyone else happy. Can't you see Az hearing this and exploding with anger towards Rhys and racing to get to her? And then Lucien seeing all of this and rejecting the bond for her? Because I can. Why would Sarah talk about rejecting mating bonds and exploring what happens after? And y'all can't say it's LoA and Beron because it is not mentioned anywhere that they are mates. They have an arranged marriage. And if they are mates, please tell me because I have been looking everywhere.

I am just over people saying that Az is entitled and only "wants a mate not Elain." I hate how people baby Lucien and say only he "deserves happiness and a mate." Like what is wrong with y'all? Y'all don't see how hypocritical y'all sound?

#acotar #elain archeron #elriel #azriel shadowsinger #anti el*cien #anti elucien #pro elriel #pro elain archeron #pro azriel

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 5 months

Note

AITA for inquiring after a blog that got deleted?

This happened several months ago and my friends have told me that I wasn't in the wrong, but my stupid anxiety keeps bringing it up and saying actually they only told me that because they like me. Maybe the judgement of strangers will finally get my brain to put it to rest. Repliers, please use she/her pronouns only for me, I don't like being called by they/them.

I'm keeping this vague to respect the privacy of the others involved; if you somehow recognize the situation, please do not give further details. Feel free to ask for clarification if something is confusing, but I will not be providing additional information like what fandom it was as I believe that would just risk revealing who was involved, and I can't think of any additional info that would affect someone's judgement of what I did. I would like judgement of what I did without risking violating anyone else involved's privacy. Also, sorry this is so long. It's the ADHD. I hate it too.

I'm relating the dms involved as closely as I can, but they won't be word-for-word.

I follow several roleplay blogs in the same fandom. One day I noticed one that I particularly liked seemed to have been deleted. I wasn't sure if they'd made a goodbye post I didn't see before deleting or something, so I made a post asking if anyone knew if something had happened with their mod, as it seemed to come out of nowhere to me. No one ever interacted with this post, but I have no way of knowing if people saw it.

I messaged a blog that I had seen interact with them a lot asking something like "hey, do you know if something happened with [blog]'s mod? I noticed they had deleted and was wondering if something happened." They replied with the single word "no" and I thanked them and apologized for bothering them. This one word was the only thing they ever said to me. I took this to mean that they didn't know if anything had happened, but didn't try to investigate further. I was vaguely concerned that they seemed to have suddenly disappeared without anyone knowing, but it wasn't my place to try and dig things up.

A couple days later I was scrolling back through a different blog and I noticed an old post they'd reblogged from the person who deleted's sideblog, and the sideblog had also been deleted. I sent a dm asking something like "Hey, I noticed [blog] and [sideblog] were both deleted, and was wondering if you knew if the mod was alright" and received a response just saying that no one wanted to make what happened public, least of all the mod. I thanked them for responding, apologized for prying, and said I hoped things were alright, then deleted my post asking if anyone knew what had happened, so that people couldn't stumble on it, get curious, and try and pry themselves.

Very shortly after, I received an anonymous ask scolding me for prying into the mod's business when they wanted things kept quiet and continuing after being told no. I posted the anon and explained that I hadn't meant to pry - just was wondering if things were okay - and that I must have misinterpreted that first "no", apologized if I'd made anyone uncomfortable, and made it clear I would absolutely not ask further. That was the end of it, at least as far as I know.

I think I might be the asshole because: I didn't know the mod, we'd never talked beyond their answering some of my asks, but I asked people about them anyways. I was genuinely wondering if they were okay and was careful not to ask what happened, but I know I can have trouble finding the line between normal and nosy, and maybe messaging two people was too far, even if the first person seemed to not know anything.

I think I might not be the asshole because: I wasn't asking for details on what happened, I was just wondering if they were okay or if I'd missed a goodbye post, and backed off immediately after being told it was private. I don't think it's really my fault that I misinterpreted the first person saying "no" to me asking if they knew if something had happened, since I thought they were literally answering my question.

Again, please do not try to figure out who was involved in this if you think you recognize it; I just want my brain to stop turning this damn situation over and over and maybe having strangers judge it will do that.

So. AITA for asking after someone who deleted their roleplay blog?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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cirusthecitrus · 1 year

Text

Horde Prime's body language and mannerisms part 2/3

Can you keep your hands to yourself for 5 minutes??

This time I'm going to talk about Prime's touch and how he weaponizes it to use as a way to manipulate, intimidate and gain control

As I said in part 1, I believe Horde Prime is naturally a tactile person and his brain better communicates with the world around him by thouching and feeling things And Prime specifically enjoys squishing faces of everyone within his reach))

1.Face touching

Prime usually goes for the face and it's easy to see why - to get full attention of his victims. They can't avert their gaze, or move, or pretend like they don't feel him touching them, since face is such a sensitive part of the body. Prime wants to always be the main focus, he wants to be seen and heard. He also wants to enjoy the view - fear and obedience that can be seen on his victims' faces

Prime also likes to keep his hand in one place for excruciatingly long time. Either to make a person almost get used to this touch or, on the opposite, make sure that they don't forget that they're still in danger. And, of course, to flex the power he has over them

Like in this scene with Glimmer. The whole time while Catra is talking Prime's palm rests on Glimmer's cheek. Even after Catra says how important the gueen is HP is still considering killing her. And he made sure that Glimmer remembered that

2. His touch is gentle... until it isn't

What I've noticed is the elegance and softness with which Prime first touches a person. If one can't read his true intentions they might misinterpret HP's touch as him trying to sooth and comfort them, to prove that he's no danger to them. When in reality this is how Prime prepares to strike. In that way he reminds me of a predator on the haunt

Also, notice how Horde Prime gets down to Hordak's level when touching him specifically. A while ago I've made a post about Prime using a real parenting technique when talking to Hordak and Glimmer to make them do what he wants. Check it out if u haven't already!

The saddest thing is - the horde clones (including Hordak) are so starved for love and touch that everytime Prime thouches their faces there's not only surprise and fear in their eyes, but also hope that this is an actual "loving" gesture and this time it won't be followed by pain. Even though they know that it is very unlikely (gladly this lil bat got lucky)

I really love this scene here. "I take no joy in destruction" Prime says, holding the flower very so gently. Yet his knowing smile tells quite the opposite

3. The claw

(again, such a cool metaphor with the flower)

Prime rarely uses his metal claw despite the fact that it is a potentially dangerous weapon and is perfect to be used for intimidation. But like I said, Prime is a tactile guy and not much can be felt through metal

HP only points his claw two times: one at Catra and one at Adora. Someone he probably saw as the biggest threats to his plans and his "perfect" future. Well, he wasn't wrong!

An interesting scene btw. This is the only moment where Prime doesn't move slowly and gently. He's smiling yes, but he's not as playful this time. He doesn't linger either - he immediately grabs her violently by the face and then lets her go right away like she disgusts him. Really shows Prime slowly losing his patience and getting more and more frustrated with his enemy

4. Grabbing people by the shoulder

This one is more subtle, not as intrusive and jarring. Yet it is still a silent reminder of the control Prime has over a person. He always reminds them of his presence even when they cant see his face

It's also interesting that before placing his hand on someone's shoulder Prime goes around them so he always stays behind their back

In this scene with Catra he again reminds me of a predatory animal, a snake elegantly circling around his prey, slowly getting closer and then grabbing her from the back, living no escape routes. And with Glimmer he stays behind but he's still leading the way, guiding her to where he needs her to go. And again, leaving zero chances at escaping

5. Feeling sentimental?

There's so much to talk about in this specific scene, but right now I'll only focus on Prime's hand touching the pod with his old vessel. Its an interesting moment, since this is one of a very few instances where Prime touches something with no intention of "breaking" it

He literally can't take his hands off that glass. Some can say that he's only touching it to prop on something while he's searching through memories. Maybe it's true, but it's not interesting! :p

I personally want to think that Prime still remembers this vessel and some of the memories that he's keeping. Maybe this one holds some great significance to Prime. Or maybe he's like that with all his old vessels and the subject of his past and his long forgotten memories is a very delicate one. Or maybe I'm simply reading way too much into this

But overall I think this shot sums it up perfectly: Horde Prime's hand ruins everything it touches. His touch is painful, his touch is deadly. No matter how gentle it may feel at first. No matter how carefully he tries to touch something. Or someone

He's the one who destroys, after all

#spop #horde prime #shera #spop meta #spacebats #horde clones #the galactic horde #ramblings #image heavy #long post

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palfriendpatine66 · 5 months

Note

Sounds like a wonderful idea to me! Sorry, I got a little carried away with your idea.

Obi-Wan and Anakin hiding their fan mail from each other because they keep getting letters describing how wonderful they are together as a couple, how right they look together, how they are meant to be, etc. Neither of them gets a single letter that doesn't mention the other one.

At first, they're probably like umm no way, everyone must be taking copious amounts of space drugs before sending us these letters.

Then they're like we'll 6,432,691 people can't be wrong, could they? No, of course they're wrong, right? Are we a couple, I'd know if we were a couple. Well, I mean, we do spend every possible waking and non-waking moment together, and I have plotted the murders for every sentient who has ever looked at him for more than 2.5 seconds, but that's all platonic and a very normal way to behave. No deeper meaning here whatsoever. Imagine they are sitting beside each other, thighs touching, on their couch sharing one thought bubble for this part.

Then comes the oh force, I'm in love with him, but he'll never love me back stage. The public gets confused by all of the pining and longing looks. They're like, y'all are already a couple...what's with the sad eyes?

Resolution comes when Anakin snoops through Obi-Wan's space email because he's desperate to figure out why Obi-Wan has been sadder in the force lately and "no he can't just ask him like a "normal" person Ahsoka". Anakin, though of course, misinterprets what he reads and is mortified thinking Obi-Wan knows how he feels about him and doesn't reciprocate, but is too wonderful of a person to reject him so he has just been suffering through Anakin's presence. "No, Ahsoka, I won't come down off of this ledge. My world is over!". Obi-Wan comes running because his pad-, his dearh-, his Anakin is in distress and needs him!

Cue tearful apologies from Anakin for inflicting himself onto Obi-Wan and lots of hugging and shushing and "It's ok, my love, you're the best part of my life", and oh look they are kissing now. Run Ahsoka run, your masters need some alone time, lots of alone time.

HI OK I LOVE THIS

If you wanted to write this I love where you took it and would absolutely read it in more detail - just saying. So cute! 💕

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multifandoms27-blog · 1 year

Note

Hello there!

I just stumbled across your blog and I love your posts! And when I saw that you also write for Creepypasta, I just had to send in a request, especially considering that there's barely anything there!

So may I ask for some general and romantic headcanons for Toby? I really love this guy!

I hope you have a wonderful day and remember to stay hydrated!

(Also, apologies if there are any mistakes, English isn't my native language ^^)

See ya! :D

Hi! Thank you, Vero, you stay hydrated and have a wonderful day as well! I'm so glad you love my stuff <3 I was just thinking about doing something for Toby, so you're in luck hehe

(Also, your English is amazing my friend. No worries <3)

• ───────────────── •

Content: Toby general and romantic headcanons with gender neutral reader

Warnings: Mentions of trauma, implied murder, implied violent bipolar episodes, obsessive behavior, toxic jealousy, toxic relationship, and implied familial trauma.

Notes: I come from the era of creepypasta where everybody believed Toby was very obsessed with waffles, and was horribly misinterpreted in fanfiction. That was about eight years ago now though, and from what I've seen the fandom has been getting better with representation of Toby.

I've put a lot of thought into this. Might use this as inspo to revamp my Jeff headcanon list.

• ───────────────── •

(art by Lynnarty on Deviantart)

❥General

I want to start by saying: I know almost nothing about Tourette's syndrome and don't know anybody who has it. If I get anything wrong, please please please correct me. I wanna get this right for you lovelies. Thank you <3

Now, what I do know about Tourette's, is that there are two types of tics: motor and phonic. I believe Toby has more motor tics than phonic. I know he's portrayed as stuttering and twitching/moving rapidly at the same time, but I don't think he has as many phonic tics as we think

I do however, think he has a natural stutter. He was bullied in grade school, and as a fellow bullied child, I can confidently say that he developed the stutter then. I will die on this hill.

His personality is also not at all that of a child, who spends all his time screaming and laughing just for the hell of it. He's unhinged, yeah, but not in the oblivious child way. More of the sadistic way for very obvious reasons.

He's more so reserved, just kinda comes and goes. There will be points in time where he decides to be super obnoxious and fuck with other pastas in the mansion, but that's moreso purposely picking fights and intentionally being annoying than whatever the hell fanfic writers wrote in the early 2010's.

He does have bipolar disorder, so he'll lose his shit when he decides to fuck with people and they fuck with him back. It turns ugly really fast.

With his CIPA (Cognitive Insensitivity to Pain), obviously he cannot feel when he gets injured on missions, or if his motor tics cause him any pain. He won't really give a shit if he finds an injury, and won't really take any steps to go to Eyeless Jack either to get patched up. Either someone else will have to bring him, or Jack will have to hunt him down himself.

Speaking of Jack, he was able to fix up the left side of Toby's mouth when he came to the mansion. Fixing Toby's injury and Jeff's face were the first two things he did.

Toby still chews on his hands and the insides of his mouth, just out of habit or if he's stressed/upset about something.

He doesn't have a reaction to fire, really. He doesn't like dwelling on the past + he's ready to just keel over and die at any moment, so it doesn't really matter to him.

Being called "Ticci Toby" angers him to no end. You will die if you call him that, no exceptions.

• ───────────────── •

❥Romantic

Toby didn't really look for love after joining the mansion

Like I mentioned above, he's ready to die at any point, so he finds it kinda pointless to get a partner if he's just gonna die soon

He noticed when you joined the mansion, but he didn't actually say anything to you until you'd been there for some months. He doesn't particularly associate himself with people in the first place, let alone people he newly "meets."

He's not very friendly at first, but being nice to him even through his obnoxious moments and horrendous mood swings and even going so far as to try to help him (he won't let you in the moment but he'll reflect on it later), it'll get you in his good graces

Being blindingly nice won't just get you in romantic territory. If he sees you being an actual person around others while just being super nice with him, it's going to make him think you're not genuine.

Just be yourself around him. When he sees you treat him the same as the others (with genuine kindness and respect) and not like he's some freak, it'll get you brownie points.

Toby doesn't realize he's insecure and thinks it's normal to get super jealous super easily. His parents didn't have the best relationship and most internet media of relationships is toxic in itself, so you'll have to be the one to sit down with him and lay out your boundaries. Even then, he'll frequently cross them.

It's not because he doesn't respect you or love you. He does. Just sometimes he wants to move the relationship a little faster, or he's impatient and wants kisses when you're with the others, or he's just plain forgetful.

Again on the jealous point though, he's going to get very upset if you don't notice he's jealous. In his mind, it's very obvious. Eventually he'll get so upset that he yanks you away from the people, cusses them out, then storms off with you and slams every door he goes through for extra measure. He's then going to cry as he holds you, apologizing and saying he didn't mean it and he was just scared you were going to leave him.

He doesn't let you be with your other pasta friends without lurking in the background, watching yours and their every move. He loves you and just wants to make sure you're okay. Happily accepts you back into his arms when you're done.

The only time you'll be able to hang out with friends outside the mansion (without him watching you) is when Toby is away on missions. If you befriend the right pastas, they'll cover for you. If he's not away though, he's very likely going to be stalking you and your friends in the background.

Toby doesn't care if you give him PDA or not, he just wants to be near you and do what he wants in the moment. Once he realizes he has feelings for you, he's going to be clinging to your side.

Loves when you show him physical affection and attention without him asking.

He also loves when you involve him in things you like. He might not participate in it, but the fact that you thought of him makes him happy. His favorite thing is eating some snacks while cuddling on his bed and watching some show you love.

Toby by himself just kinda exists. Toby in a relationship with you just kinda exists, but he wants people to know that you only exist with him.

For obvious reasons, Toby is a fucked up individual, and a relationship with him will always be toxic in some aspect. Everyone in the pasta mansion is fucked up, and very few will have healthy relationships. Yes, we love the pastas anyway, but we cannot fix them, so just keep that in mind lovelies <3

• ───────────────── •

Here is my Masterlist in case you want to request, or look for more of your favorite character!

#creepypasta #creepypasta mansion #ticci toby #ticci toby x reader #ticci toby x you #ticci toby x y/n #toby rogers x reader #toby rogers x you #toby rogers x y/n #god i love toby #ticci toby headcanons #toby rogers #ticci toby hc #creepypasta headcanons

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alena-reblobs · 8 months

Text

Trigun Bookclub Trimax Vol10 Part 1

Vol01: Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Vol02: Part 1 | Part 2

I'm early for this one cause I won't have time the rest of the week. And as a bonus it's like doing the presentation first: after that I can lay back, watching all the others knowing that I've put it already behind me. This is only part1 but I trust you've read the whole volume when you read this commentary! I might make 3 parts with all the images I'm putting in this now, haha....

Chapter 1:

Sad music playing in the bg, all other noises canceled out, room relatively cool: let's go.

I can't get over the fact how Wolfwood's playing scnes with Vash out in his head. And this moment here! It was such an important discussion, their first clash of ideals....And now Wolfwood wants to prove him wrong. That he is NOT giving up hope so easily.

"Do not tell me you are betting on hopes" I thought you were some kind of religious cult?? Believing in the holy creatures? Well there really isn't much believe left in this dying old man. Such a poor soul. He doesn't believe in his own religion. He might once have believed in his god (aka Knives) but would want him dead now- only that he doesn't believe he can kill him so he doesn't believe in a future for anyone. He doesn't believe in his pupils and doesn't believe them when they say they might know a way of salvation. And now he's just trying to drag everybody down with him.

And Wolfwood IS believing....with his whole heart and without a doubt. Oh my god. (And he hasn't forsaken you either!!!)

Disapproving of this weapon head tilt which is reserved for gay battle couples only!

Can you stop shooting this man for one fucking second

FOR ONE SECOND

FOR FUCK'S SAKE

I wonder if we can read this hesitation by Razlo as a sentiment of Livio deep deep within who might NOT want to kill Wolfwood? It could also just be Razlo's shock at seeing how he misinterpreted his opponent though.

Go to hell old man.

Chapter 2:

I need to remind myself that Razlo is not just "kill kill kill!" or blindly following Chapel. He's also nuanced and got lots of respect for this worthy opponent (and ex colleague of his, ex friend/brother of Livio).

This title here is giving me emotions and I want that image as a patch to sew on my backpack please

I can't really distinguish...is he talking about a bad chill? As in making him uneasy? He looks like it, but I'm not sure..

I gotta say shooting yourself is a hardcore statement. Great, now he's a MAD angry old ass of a man. But to Razlo I say: Have your forgotten the girl Livio saved??? And you, yous saved Razlo countless times!! Did they not need you both? D:

Miss Melanie is such a lovable character!! Go and protect your kids...even if you know the enemy is far too powerful! I love this little comedic moment in between this whole mess (And sh reminds me a bit of my mother, too)

Why else? Because you're an arsehole maybe, or because he has learned that he can chose not to be a killer and be a decent person?

This is such such such an evil move of Chapel. "Here, look at this boy, once innocent and a part of your family...now he's changed into a disgusting creature! Look at him and judge him and laugh at him and his poor life."

And the worst part, exactly this has been one of Wolfwood's biggest fears. Because next to not being able to save his family at the orphanage...if one of them would see Wolfwood as he is now and decide that he is a despicable person, someone who doesn't deserve redemption, it would mean he is truly lost. Then he would be only a killer and nothing more.

Thank god Melanie is having none of it. And look how Wolfwood's eye that was just a moment ago wide with shock is closing, his whole feature relaxing. This is what he needed...her telling him that he could have come home anytime. That he is still and will always be! A part of their family.

Of course you moron you could have done this together!! If you didn't run off alone...trying to do things on your own. Somehow, now that I think about this...this really feels like act of a boy that didn't have time to grow up. Running off to the orphanage was not Wolfwood- it was Nicholas doing it. Not Wolfwood the Punisher but Nicholas the Boy. Why is this thought making me emotional?

Fuck we see him thinking, thinking fast of a way to still save the situation, seeing the vials, maybe wondering if he will be able to do it with them can he do it can he do it

You godforsaken idiot why did you have to bite them down and seal your fate

And in the moment when Nicholas needed him most, Vash came. But he came a second too late.

Look, there's just something about Vash coming to his rescue in this moment where Wolfwood is at his lowest. Completely ripped apart, laid bare before his loved ones...These two pages, and the sole sentence "I've made a friend" is something so poetic...they make me internally scream because YES you've made a friend, you both love and trust each other deeply...you really have made such a good friend. SOBBING

#trigun #trigunbookclub

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fluidstatick · 6 months

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I've finally had some coffee and given myself the chance to look back over the last four episodes of cr3, figuring out how this happened. This got long. Strap in.

In 3.74, Ashton told Evontra'vir "I seek my past, I seek power. I seek to know who I am." Evontra'vir tells them that their father, Evterin, came to ask for power. "He was a broken man of burning purpose. He came to ask me for the golden purpose they felt the world owed them. He claimed visions that promised greatness. He was not wrong. I showed him his future, and showed him the way to the necropolis of Toramunda, where he recovered the final shard of Ka'mort. He thought his destiny was his to embrace, but he was wrong. He was meant to create and destroy the Hishari, and in the process, create you. He could not see beyond his own aspirations, but now you have returned to me seeking another piece of history's sorrow, in the name of finding your own destiny."

Too Flowery; Didn't Read: Ashton contains a shard of Ka'mort, the primordial titan empress of Earth, because their father blew up the Hishari trying to wield it incorrectly.

Evontra'vir vagues for a while about who and what he is, but that's not relevant to this investigation I'm doing. Ashton gives the tree a hit from their pipe of heroism, to try and give insight into who he was. They only get back vague images of the tree collecting souls from the air around him.

Matt's delivery of this conversation is extremely slow, and I found myself easily distracted, so I missed a lot of Tal's microexpressions during this bit the first time. Watching it back again, I note that Ashton is visibly processing the fact that they're here because of their father's big greedy mistake, and that the calamity was a big greedy mistake that created Evontra'vir. The gears are turning, and they're deciding it will probably benefit them to make massive, stupid decisions and create something legendary. They've decided to get suicidally reckless, because to them, that's how creation happens.

In the latest 4sd, one of vanishingly few things that stuck out to me was Taliesin saying, basically, "I've realized that Ashton and Percy hate each other because they're pretty much the same person. They're both stubborn, reckless, broken assholes who make big stupid moves, and they see that in each other, and they can't stand it." Marisha was surprised, but Ashley wasn't. In fact, Tal said to Ashley shortly after that, "we're going to have a chat about this fire shard off camera. But I think we're on the same page."

Anyway, Evontra'vir says, slowly and with much cryptic flourish, that ashton will have to make a few very big decisions and become someone of great importance soon, whether they want to or not. Then the tree splits open to make a portal and says I'm sending you to where the shard is. Hurry, you're running out of time." They hop through the portal into a blizzard. Episode ends.

In 3.75, when they get to the bottom of the cave diving situation, they find a bunch of little fire imps guarding the shard. It's made abundantly clear that the fire shard and earth shard are meant for two different vessels, and if they're put into the same vessel things won't end well. Ashton's eyes sparkle like Oh Really? The party hems and haws for a bit about the safest way to retrieve the shard, but Ashton gets frustrated, says fuck it, and hops into the pool of lava that the shard is sitting at the bottom of. They start taking disgusting amounts of fire damage. Imogen asks telepathically if they're ok, and they just scream back. Fearne says well, fuck this, and dives in after them. They both come up out of the lava, somehow not dead. Their combined lack of self preservation saved both of them. Ashton says "I always wanted a sister." (Mirroring what imodna said about each other earlier in the campaign, basically rigging the callowmoore ship to sail.) Fearne misinterprets this as setting a hard boundary ("that's not where I was seeing this going - never mind.")

But that sets another leg of this awful table. Ashton has swung for the fences, gotten their shit rocked, and Fearne has saved them. The expectation has been set: Ashton fucks up, Fearne runs damage control.

The rest of the party wonders who should have the shard. Fearne doesn't want it, she's cagey about it. The party reconfirms with Matt that letting Ashton have it wouldn't end well. Ashton looks unconvinced; "He said it might be bad, not that it definitely would be bad."

A while back when they said I'm done fucking around, i wanna be a hero, they wanted to believe they were going to become more like Orym. We wanted to believe it too. But their version of heroism isn't being prudent and proactive. It's being hungry, reckless, stubborn. It's who their father was, it's who they are. A legacy of big swings, and even bigger misses, that change that course of history. They'll win or they'll die, and it's not out of love and duty. It's out of anger and self obsession. They care about others, but they don't put in the work to respect others with their actions.

They're not alone in this mistake. Letters is reckless and stubborn for moral reasons (harming laudna repeatedly to prove a point about the changebringer), but Ashton is unique in that they're reckless and stubborn for egoic reasons (get revenge on the bad guys for making them suffer all their life, get famous in the process, and fuck everybody else's feelings).

Taliesin made the right character call. It blindsided everyone because they saw Taliesin first, then the shadow of Caduceus' wisdom, then Percy's sense of justice, and finally just a flicker of Ashton's hypocrisy and bitterness. Matt was upset because he made the consequences extremely clear. But Ashton didn't care about consequences, they wanted revenge and glory, in that order, and if they died first then they wouldn't have to say goodbye to the hells or face the emotional consequences of their decisions.

When tal said "you gave me a big red button," he didn't mean "heehoo spicy plot device go boom lmao." He meant "this was my opportunity to show y'all just how unstable and fucked up the barbarian really is. The possibilities are endless, and that's not a good or fun thing. We're literally all powder kegs and don't you dare forget it."

Delilah encouraged Fearne and Imogen to go dark, and now they're seriously considering it. Orym spent every single dime he had in Whitestone, at Gilmore's and the Slayer's Cake, as a love letter and an apology to VM for what he's about to do. He gave Fearne the spyglass he stole off the ghost ship, because in his words, "now you can keep an eye on me." Implying she'll lose him soon. (he believes he's going to die on the moon, and very probably fail to save Exandria from Predathos, because the group is so disjointed.)

Chet is rolling death checks at disadvantage, hitting on Percy's sister, muttering jokes about how there won't be wood on the moon so he doesn't want to go, and basically hanging back from connecting with anybody around him. He doesn't give a fuck.

Matt's teeing them up with so, so many existential decisions, and they're all leaning in the wrong direction. Laudna is leaning into Delilah. Fearne is leaning into Ashton's hubris and chewing on the possibilities of Dark!Fearne. Imogen is flirting with the idea that her mother's power might not be so morally reprehensible after all. Orym and Chet are marching toward death. Letters continues to play the one song they know, myopically fixated on the gods who have done nothing but ask them for things and show them darkness. And Ashton is finally, textually, metaphorically and literally, melting down in the name of Glory. You win or you die, and it doesn't matter which anymore. Not to any of them.

It stings like a motherfucker, but it's narratively consistent.

#long post #cr spoilers #critical role spoilers #cr3 #this isn't the most concise or eloquent explanation #but i feel less betrayed now that I've chewed on some motivations and flipped some assumptions around

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redd956 · 1 year

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Oddly specific dynamic that's been scratching an itch in my brain recently: Well meaning but seriously at their limit Caretaker and feral, feisty Whumpee. Maybe they were rivals or something, so Caretaker doesn't exactly like Whumpee but doesn't want them to die. Stuff like:

"Oh my god, do I have to hold you down or something? Just accept my help damnit" "No! I don't trust you, you've probably drugged it!" "...Genuinely, how the fuck would I even drug a hot water bottle???"

"You're not gonna like this, but it's important... Hold still I— Really?? You've been though all that and you're crying because I'm putting a little antiseptic on your wounds?? *sigh* Come here..."

(Caretaker gives Whumpee bandages) "Since you won't let me do it, you can treat those yourself." (Whumpee throws it at them) "That goes on your wounds, not my face."

(Sorry if this doesn't make sense I just need to screech my thoughts somewhere)

OML, I was just thinking about this dynamic last night! I completely understand ya

It is a very fun and interesting dynamic indeed, and there's multiple different ways/reasons it could be laid storywise too. Some notable ones I know about are...

Caretaker & Whumpee were once rivals (like you mentioned). Caretaker genuinely cares about whumpee's health, but whumpee is misinterpreting the situation as another way for their rival to get the upperhand

Hero & Villain Dynamic (Goes either way). Is the other planning to finish the job and truly end them? Or does their enemy want to see whumpee heal?

Nonhuman Caretaker & Human Whumpee. Perhaps understandably so whumpee is terrified of what caretaker is. Especially if Caretaker's species is known for hostility. Caretaker doesn't understand why, and just wants to help.

The opposite of the prior. Human caretaker and nonhuman whumpee. Nonhuman caretaker has recieved on maltreatment and hostility from humnas. Maybe they too were raised with horrific stories. Now a human is trying to coerce them back to health?! Something must obviously be wrong.

Maybe something happened to whumpee themselves, that has made them interpret the world in such a way. Maybe a previous whumper was the same species, worked for the same organization, who knows.

Maybe just the wear away itself has changed whumpee.

Eitherway something has made them act defiant or feral.

I also personally love the two popular reactions/personality tropes that can arrange from Caretaker.

Really thoughtful, deeply saddened Caretaker who wants nothing more but to help whumpee

And the "god what's wrong with bish" Caretaker, who is equally annoyed as they are concerned

I do love a variation of the latter, which is usually consists of caretaker being more so the person who dislikes the other, either for backstory between the two or distance socially (loner, exes, whatevs)

It allows a double character arch where Caretaker loses their social distance, and warms up to whumpee, and whumpee learns to accept help and gain back their trust in others. We also get to see whumpee shed the feralness, and begin to lean into help. Maybe in the end they never stop being stubborn, but they definitely get used to Caretaker.

#whump #whump tropes #character dynamics #whump character dynamics #whump dynamics #caretaker #whumpee #caretaker x whumpee #hero & villain #whump ideas #whump rambling #whump writing

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cosmicjoke · 6 months

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Hi, I read your post about shipping and you just said everything that I have been wanting to say. Well , I admit to be an eruri shipper, But for my personal interests about these two very well written characters and the special relationship they share. It doesn't have to be romantic and thier lives don't have to revolve around each other. I won't go out my way insinuating Levi was all about Erwin and shit. That is totally disregarding his character.

I read eruri fics on ao3 everyday and I want to say most of them misinterpret both thier characters for sake of their "yaoi" fantasy. I am sick of it. I won't say don't ship who you want. I am an eruri shipper too but doing this is totally childish.

I think Levi was the one person Erwin trusted with his whole life and he was last and only person who ever understood who he was and saw him as a human. In a way Erwin's own va( Ono daisuke) saying Levi was the last holder of Erwin's remaining humanity. And Erwin being a commander who Levi trusted implicitly. Humanity needed Erwin but now that Erwin doesn't have the drive anymore he wouldn't be able to be the same commander, as you said. Levi saved him from living life of a devil, floch wanted and gave him salvation from the dream that was borne of his guilt and childish curiosity which turned him this cold but coldness was needed for his commandership.

Thier relationship is very well written even more so, in my opinion , Canon ship, I like the complexity and intricacies of thier relationship romantic or platonic. But those toxic shipper demoting thier characters to just revolve around each other and forgetting thier true motives is infuriating.

Levi's priority was and is always HUMANITY,FIRST AND FOREMOST.

Erwin was slave to his dream, Levi freed him of it and Erwin was grateful to have someone take this burden of this guilt and dream away and giving him some clarity and epiphany. Erwin knew Levi would never let humanity down, so hence letting him make his final choice.

Erwin provided Levi a way to serve humanity in survey corps, thier relationship is fascinating. But your point is valid and true to it's meaning. THANK YOU.

Hi there, and thank you so much, I really appreciate it.

I don't have any problem whatsoever with shipping Levi and Erwin, and in fact, the vast majority of fanfic I read is eruri, which is why it's so funny to me that I keep getting attacked over being "biased" against the ship, lol. I'm not at all, I'm just able to separate it from actual canon. Something I don't think should be hard to do.

Indeed, Levi and Erwin have one of the bets and most complex relationships IN canon, far more complex and, imo, meaningful than if they were simply a romantic couple, which is also why I don't understand this fanatical need by some shippers to make it into some cliched romance.

For sure, Erwin trusted Levi above everyone else, and in the end, that trust was rewarded, because Levi saw through to Erwin's heart, in a way I think even Erwin himself couldn't see. Levi trusted in Erwin for a reason too. He saw a goodness in Erwin that Erwin was blind to. So when Erwin doubted his own worth as a leader, and was beginning to question if he'd committed some horrific wrong because his personal motivation underpinned his commandership, Levi reaffirmed his belief in him and gave him a chance at redemption. Indeed, Levi gave Erwin his humanity back, when it was on the verge of being lost, and in the end, by choosing as he did to let Erwin die, he allowed Erwin to keep his humanity and to die worthy of his title.

That's way more powerful and meaningful than some silly, formulaic love story where Levi betrays everyone and everything for his love of one man, lol. I don't even know why people are into that concept, or into the concept of Levi being so rapturously enamored with Erwin, that nothing else matters to him but pleasing him or doing his bidding.

Levi chose to follow Erwin because he believed in Erwin as a leader with a far reaching vision, and as someone who could lead humanity to victory over the titans, and was pure in his intentions to fight for humanity. He saw him as admirably devoted to that duty, and believed in him for that devotion.

Anyway, thank you again for reaching out!

#Levi Ackerman #Erwin Smith

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randomraytrash · 1 year

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There is something weird in Nate character arc

I love Nate and I like his relationship with Jade. I root for his happiness, I was Nate x Happiness way before season two, because I really relate at many of the mental struggles he faces.

But let me make clear a thing:

Relationships don't fix mental illness.

A new partner will not fix all the problems in your life.

A good relationship can help you, can support you through difficult time, but it won't magically fix you. You need to act, change your behaviour and fix yourself, because nobody will do it for you.

Nate needs to own his fucking mess, he needs to see through Rupert schemes and put his foot down. Because blocking his mistakes (with Ted, especially Ted) like he did during this episode won't help him, avoidance can work only for a short period of time, then it comes back and bite you in the ass.

Because everybody is growing and changing but him (and no, getting a girlfriend is not synonymous of a redemption arc, nor a healing process, especially if all his confidence is still tight with "getting a girl" and without a girl to "show off" he's worthless, which wasn't disproved yet and no, don't spit at your self reflection one time, while never addressing the root cause is not enough). He's risking of getting stuck in the past, in his old mentality, in a fake confidence not internal but tied to an external person (Jade).

Fight forward, isn't it? Get out of that box and live the moment, every moment is worth living, because you are worth it, whatever you succeeded or failed, you deserve happiness in your life.

That's what I think we should stride for Nate's arc.

It's nice that Nate got a girlfriend (I enjoy them because they are such opposite character and energy), but it'll come crushing and burning down if he doesn't understand why he was able to ask her out. It matters that he found the courage to ask her out for a date, but he matters regardless, even without this accomplishment.

Nobody defined Nate if not Nate himself. And I think Jade can help him realize it, but the relationship with her is not a magic cure (and to be absolutely critical I think they will have many communication problem if they don't learn how properly work things out before a real relationship, since Jade is not really an extroverted person and Nate is an anxious mess ready to misinterpret every ambiguous body language, I know it because I'm the same).

Getting a girl is not the redemption arc, is not the finale, it's barely a consequence of the first step in becoming a better person. I believe (eh, Ted Lasso, isn't it?) Nate is fundamentally a good person, he's a brilliant tactician, funny and sensible, but he's also deeply insecure and he broke the trust, and leash out to people who (truly) loved and trust him and we can say all we want to explain his reasoning (his past bullying, his daddy problems, the miscommunication), but it doesn't chance the fact he was wrong, it's not a justification.

Nate matters with Rupert, and without him (a lot more without him). With Ted's or his father's approval or without. (And already had Ted's, like this episode he went to see him play with his son, Ted already, for the most part, forgive him. Ted doesn't have to accept his apology, but Ted Lasso is Ted Lasso and do what Ted Lasso can do best: treating people with compassion, so he will without a second thought the moment he'll see Nate sincerely regrets).

But Nate does need to do it, though, he's redemption arc is tied with this apology. Because they say hurt people hurt people, and it may be true, but it's also bullshit. Even if your struggle with mental health, you have no right to hurt others.

To do this apology thought Nate needs to grow, needs to build his confidence and self esteem for himself, because he's action were mostly a counteract to a perceive rejection, he is not what twitter says about him, or Jade, or Ted, or his father, or Rupert.

The belief that you matter, you know? Regardless of what I do or don't archive.

Ted is going to forgive him, of course he is.

#But let me be real with you real quick #if somebody I trust revealed my mental struggles to somebody else for a petty revenge for a perceived betrayal I didn't even done (while I #I would never NEVER talk to them again nor accept their apologizes. Fucking hell that shit makes my blood boil #I understand Nate but I despise what he did there #he was in wrong and there are no justification #he needs to apologize #I'm just rambling at this point but as somebody who mental struggle made do a lot of bad shit #i cannot emphasize enough how much apologizing was part of healing myself and giving the chance to start over without baggage #ted lasso #ted lasso spoilers #nate shelley #Again it's an interpretation #Do not take this as an attack to his character more like a thought about calling getting a girl a redemption arc #I still root for him #And I shamelessly enjoy him on screen every time

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