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#and him saying LET THERE BE LIGHT to gabriel

vroomvroomwee · 9 months

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Crowley is Lucifer

(Ok I know some of you don't believe this theory but I highly suggest you give this a quick read anyway. I tried to make it short and easy and I'll be going chronologically, from s1 all through s2)

- First, let's get this out of the way, Lucifer and Satan aren't neccesarilly the same person. Even in the show the devil that appeared in s1 has only ever been reffered to as Satan, not even once as Lucifer.

- In the bible Lucifer was the one to tempt Eve with the apple, and who do we know that does that in the show. Crowley is literally THE snake from Eden.

- An obvious one perhaps, but the red hair is also a giveaway

- In the bible Jesus was tempted by the devil for 30 days, in the show Crowley says "I showed him all the kingdoms of the world", so that's another role Lucifer has that Crowley had in the show

- It's well known (even mentioned in the Sandman) that Lucifer was the most beautiful of all angels, and our demon is played by no other than David Tennant

Now on to season 2 because there's a LOT to unpack here

- He litterally started the engine of the universe which was one of Lucifers roles

- He's the first to say "let there be light", which is pretty fucking huge since that is Gods line

- "I worked closely with upstairs on it" even in the first scene they're telling us Crowley is an angel of very very high rank

- He fell for asking questions, which is litterally what Lucifer fell for, for questioning God. This in and of itself should be a pretty big indicator. "I only ever asked questions"

- Shax: "a miracle of enourmous power only the mightiest of archangels can perform"

Crowley: "How do you know I didn't do it"

And Shax just... doesn't counter that. She looks even skeptical, as if it COULD be a possibility, unlike Uriel who says to Aziraphale don't excpect us to believe you did it. Shax litterally doesn't shut the option down which confirms Crowley has the power not only of an archangel but of the mightiest kind

- In the bookshop with Gabriel/Jim he says "I don't remember. It [gravity] seemed like a good idea when we were all talking about it"

- "You're welcome to come in, you might even spot an archangel" don't tell me this was Crowley just egging Shax on and not being sneaky

- The fact that he could sense the demons coming. "Somethings wrong""It's coming in waves", when Aziraphale couldn't. It could be a demon thing but we saw Sandalphon, an archangel of lower rank, in the first season mention "something smells evil" so obviously angels can sense demons too, they just have to be powerful enough. And keep in mind Sandalphon was already in the book shop for quite some time, Crowley sensed them even before they had arrived (he also sensed the hell hound who was some fucking miles away)

- The.fucking.folder. "You have to be a throne or dominion above" and this dude opens these clasified documents like it's nothing. If this isn't an indicator of his high position as an angel I don't know what is.

- He's worked with Saraqael, another very high ranking angel

- "I'm the only first order archangel in the room"... and the camera imediately pans to Crowley, and for anyone who's read the book and watched the show you know that rarely anything is coincidental

- When the Metatron says they can't lose another prince of heaven. This... this fucking line. So it's relatively well known that Gabriel and Lucifer are brothers, and if Gabriel is one of the princes of heaven I wonder who the other one could be. "Two princes of heaven". And the Metatrons words were very careful, he doesn't say lost as in heaven can't find him, he says it in the context that they won't be sending Gabriel to hell since they won't lose another prince to downstairs

- In the bookshop when no one can identify the Metatron he turns to Crowley who imediately recognises him. Now you have this dude, who's literally on top of the angel hierarchy and is responsible for running heaven and the connection to God themself, surrounded by archangels and a principality you spoke to face to face with just a few years ago and... none of them can tell who you are, the only one who does is the literal demon. That tells us that Crowley has not only seen him in this form, but has probably worked with the Metaron himself personally. "Always asking damn fool questions", 10 million angels and he remembers what this one particular angel was like 6000 years ago

- Crowley is also very reluctant to reveal his identity as an angel. Now if he were just an ordinary angel of no real significance he wouldn't have a problem revealing his name, but... if his name was one that's the literal representation of all evil in this world, then it is understandable he keeps it a secret, in fear he might scare Aziraphale away

- And I wanted to leave the best for last. So you remember in the book when Crowley has to sign his name to start Armaggedon, and Hastur tells him "no, your real name" after which he reluctantly writes it. Now in the book we never see him write anything, but in the show we see him write a sygil, something that looks very mich like an L. An L... A FUCKING L. And now I wonder how this theory didn't come up sooner.

(Also he can fucking stop time, like dafuq)

Edit:

- "Oh looky here it's Lucifer and the guys" we all thought he was talking about someone else, he's just refferencing things other angels have said about HIM. FUCK

- I keep seing people saying Crowleys memories were wiped because he couldn't remember Saraqael and Furfur. But I think people forget, demons lie. He's lying to make them think he's not that angel they worked with, that he's not Lucifer. (In season 1 we hear him a few times refferencing his life as an angel, so he does remember most of it)

- Also saying if the Raphael theory were true then as showrunners they would have mentioned him somewhere for those not that familiar with the bible (or don't read much fanfiction). The refferences for Crowleys past are so so vague that it would be too sudden and confusing if he were Raphael. But there is one name that everyone is familiar with, no matter who you are how old you are or where you're from, a name that needs no introduction.

Edit 2:

- Back to him being the most beautiful angel, I don't think it was ever quite explained how every single demon when they're in hell looks... awful, but Crowley doesn't. Beelzebub has the spores all over their face, Hastur the maggots and the sh-, Dagon the scales etc. But Crowley doesn't, not even when he's in hell, he's always just so, well, pretty.

- I saw a few people asking about how Lucifer started the rebellion and Crowley wouldn't do that. I think it's the same Crowley who wouldn't get stuck in traffic after creating the M25, or the same Crowley that wanted to call Aziraphale after bringing down the entire London network, "you told them you invented the spanish inquisition, and started the second world war""so the humans beat me to it that's not my fault", "so all this is your demonic work?""no, the humans thought it up themselves nothing to do with me"

- Also I think Satan's in charge of hell not Crowley the same way the Metatron's in charge of heaven and not Gabriel (and who can very easily demote angels if he so wishes)

Edit 3:

- like some of you pointed out Lucifer is also known/means Light-bringer. And Crowley was the first to say "let there be light."

- The file he opens with Muriel is Gabriels file, a class A archangel, so if he knows the password to that it means that either he's on the same level as Gabriel, or above him.

#crowley is lucifer #goodomenss2 #crowley #goodomens #aziraphale #good omens #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #goodomenss2spoilers #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #goodomens2 #goodomensspoilers #good omens spoilers #good omens s2 #good omens season two #good omens series 2 #good omens season 2 spoilers #good omens s2 spoilers

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halemerry · 9 months

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On Crowley, memory, and identity.

So full disclosure first, I am not someone who is particularly interested in having Crowley's angel name on screen - personally I rather like the idea of never having an answer to this question - but I also do think it's interesting and fun to speculate and we got quite a few hints at this throughout this season soooo

Obviously part of this is that we meet him. The angel that would become Crowley is the first person on screen this season. We confirm a lot about him here. He confirm that he is powerful enough to start the engine of the universe. We confirm that he can control gravity and time and space and light. We confirm that he is the being that says let there be light before the beginning. We also confirm that he consulted with the concept designer of the universe and that he's very comfortable with the idea of questioning authority. We are also given Aziraphale's anxiety as a contrast to this and as proof that that is not a universal trait for early angels.

Now, we have always had evidence that Crowley is powerful. He's done some things that seem impossibly big. He stops time very casually and seemingly without effort - even at the end of season 1 it doesn't even seem to give us the same strain on him that holding the Bentley together does. This is a thing that we only ever see Crowley do and notably a thing that you would think other beings would mess with to their advantage if it was possible. Which means they either literally can't or that it never occurred to them that they could. Or as is becoming increasingly clear: perhaps it's a bit of both.

But that's not the only implication of power we get in season 1 either. We get Crowley seemingly in tune with the universe in a way many angels and demons aren't. Which, makes some sense if he helped make it. This manifests in all sorts of ways. He's constantly aware of Aziraphale's presence. He can smell when the world state changes like when Adam names Dog. He holds the Bentley together through utter destruction. He notices that there are different books in the bookshop - something I always assumed was meant to convey he was familiar with the shop's contents but after learning he didn't even know Jane Austen was a writer I wonder if it's actually more to do with him being in tune with reality. He also can apparently quite literally feel when there are eyes on them.

We're given even more of all these things this season in some really interesting ways. Crowley literally tests the air to check if a miracle has happened - another thing that we don't see anyone else do despite Heaven literally assigning someone to Aziraphale to check for a specific miracle. This particular beat is also something we are shown twice this season. Both here and in 1941, when Furfur uses the miracle blocker on Aziraphale. Here Crowley tests his miracles and despite getting nothing of the sort when Aziraphale tries a miracle literally the beat before this, we are given both a visual and an auditory effect. It ripples out with a watery sound effect from Crowley's finger. It's like he's prodding at reality.

There's also several instances involving the recognition or lack thereof of angels and demons. Crowley feels that the demon army is arriving before it does. Neither side seems to be able to track Gabriel - one of the most powerful beings in existence - at all once he leaves Heaven. We also see countless angels fail to notice Crowley himself both as Bildad the Shuhite performing literal miracles right in front of them. And this happens again as he prances about Heaven after Muriel. Aziraphale can't tell Shax is a demon despite Crowley recognizing she's manifested behind him nearly as soon as he answers the phone. Aziraphale can't even recognize that he himself is still an angel at the end of the Job story.

He also. Quite literally. Brings someone back from the dead???? Like waves a hand casually on the street and reconstitutes Mr. Brown like he'd never been dead at all. Mr. Brown returns with no memory of what happened to him holding a newspaper that seems to have literal bite chunks coming out of it. It's not framed as a huge miracle or anything strenuous either - just a casual snap.

And that's not even getting into the parallels with Gabriel. First of all. We get the color purple. It's purple when Aziraphale and angel that would become Crowley start the engine of the quadrants of the universe and it's purple when they miracle to hide Gabriel. This color is associated with power and, historically in the language of this show, with Gabriel himself. Them using it together twice speaks a lot to the power they have together.

But that's not the only symbolism historically tied to Gabriel that has found its way to Crowley this season either. Most flashy of all is the lightning. This is how we see Gabriel arrive on earth at the end of season one and it is something Crowley apparently just Does when he gets too mad to contain himself.

This alone wouldn't catch my attention except. Except the way Crowley reacts to Gabriel's memory problems is... interesting to say the least. He's angry and understandably so. Part of this is him being mad and protective of Aziraphale - he says as much himself to Jim directly. And yet, weirdly, it's the kind of mad that reminded me of something else.

This is the mad he tends to gets at his plants. Do it properly. Think hard. You can do better than that. Grow better. It's the kind of angry that's steeped in projection. It's he kind of angry that is undercut with the occasional weird undercurrent of understanding. And so much of his dialogue with Jim around this is framed like he does actually understand. Jim says it hurts and he says he knows. Jim starts talking about it feeling like being an empty house that still remembers where the furniture is and Crowley immediately latches onto this and understands ah it's looking at where the furniture isn't.

And there's a few other conversations that center around this issue that I find really interesting from a projection perspective. There's the conversation that happens when Crowley goes to have an alcohol fueled chat with Jim. He says "You're Jim now. Got everything just the way you wanted?" This doesn't make a whole lot of sense for him to be addressing Gabriel with. As far as he knows all Gabriel would want was the end of the world.

And then there's the particular way he asks Jim to eliminate himself in this scene. Climb out the window. In other words, have a fall. Something he pretty immediately retracts and clearly feels guilty about no matter how much he hates Gabriel.

And then there's the first conversation he gets to have after learning about Gabriel. Crowley opens this conversation, thinking out loud. He's staring out, not talking to Az yet and the very first thing out of his mouth is, of all things: "He's going to be okay." A weird start for a statement about Gabriel in itself but then Crowley goes and adds what at it's core is his own trauma narrative to the end with, "We can just take him somewhere and leave him there."

Now the real fun bit: Crowley also has memory issues that are out very prominently on display even as far back as season 1.

He has inconsistent memories of his Fall. The answers he gives us to why he Fell change slightly - even when he's alone with himself. He doesn't seem to understand why exactly he Fell even though he clearly has some vague idea of the pieces in play. I always thought to some degree that this was just a trauma response, but season 2 drew even more attention to this and now that we know that memory alteration is how Heaven handles powerful angels I can't help but to wonder if there's more in play here.

Crowley can't remember Furfur - who he apparently literally fought next to during the war in Heaven. Crowley can't remember building a nebula with Saraqael. Crowley doesn't remember why they decided gravity was a good idea.

But he does remember bits and pieces here and there. He remembers doing some of the starmaking. He remembers how to access clearance locked files. He's missing pieces and also seems to have an understanding that Gabriel's memories ARE in there. Almost like he's done this work on himself before.

This narrative itself is also far more concerned with the angel Crowley was this time around. It teases his rank a few different times. Most notably is him having access the files only available to Dominions and above.

Now angel hierarchy is a bit of a messy area depending on what sources you're using but given Good Omens tendencies in the past we can assume that this leaves us five ranks. Dominion, Throne, Cherub, Seraph, and Archangel.

I might break down why I think Dominion, Throne, and Cherub feel kind of odd to me later if there's interest - now available here - in that but given the current length of this meta I just want to focus on that last one for now.

Crowley was an Archangel is far from a new theory and I've honestly historically had some fairly mixed feelings about it. But the parallels between Jim and Crowley lend some interesting connective tissue to a lot of those theories. And. There's also some interesting camera work and script writing tied to Crowley and that term outside of the scenes about Gabriel's memories specifically.

Firstly, during Crowley's chat with Beelzebub he says it's a big universe with plenty of places for an archangel to hide. Like Alpha Centauri perhaps?

Then we get Aziraphale and Crowley both presenting Hell and Heaven respectively the idea that it could have been them that did the archangel class miracle. Aziraphale gets scoffed at and yet. Shax is the one who says the miracle was archangel level and Crowley's response is "how do you know I didn't do it?"

Then later as she's prowling about the shop we get this interesting shot of Crowley in the doorframe and Jim in the background. Crowley grins and offers to let Shax look in and see if she can see any archangels in there while he's framed dead center and Jim himself is blurry in the back of the frame.

And most fascinating in my opinion is this shot that happens when Crowley and Muriel are accessing the classified files. Nearly every shot in this sequence is group shots or shots of Gabriel. The camera is focused in the plot and the way the archangels function as a group and on Gabriel himself. But we get one single shot in this entire sequence of Crowley by himself and it is immediately following Gabriel saying "I am the only first order archangel in the room - or, well, the universe."

And then in the end. We get the Metatron who goes out of his way to avoid using Crowley's name. He calls him demon (and insists correctly that Crowley would recognize him even when Michael doesn't) or refers to him as Aziraphale's friend. He only ever uses that name when trying to use him as a bribe for Aziraphale. That combined with the dark look he gives Crowley implies a familiarity that only the Metatron has with him.

So who is he then? There's plenty of old meta out there about why certain archangels fit or don't and I won't reiterate them here. They're interesting and definitely worth poking around at and very fun to read! Personally I'm not as interested in naming the someone he used to be as I am in examining the places that ghost of this angel has started to poke through the narrative so I'll end this here. It's spiralled into something far longer than I ever meant it to be anyway.

#good omens #good omens spoilers #good omens season 2 #gos2 spoilers #good omens meta #Crowley #Gabriel

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yougavemeyourheartyouknow · 3 months

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Thinking about baby daddy!Miguel O’Hara that starts to invite you over to do activities more often during his weeks with Gabriella, saying it would be good to show your daughter that you both still had a good relationship with each other. Which struck you as odd since you two genuinely have always gotten along anyways but you decided to ignore it and brush it off.

Baby Daddy!Miguel who invites you over to his place on a hot summer day, saying that he’s having a pool party with a bunch of your friends. Insisting you bring the guy you’ve been talking to so he can finally meet him and totally doesn’t want him there to prove to him that he’s not worth your time.

Baby Daddy!Miguel who can’t keep his eyes off you when you come out to the backyard after having changed into his favorite a bikini, asking Mj to help you apply sunscreen on your back. Wishing it was his hands rubbing it into your skin instead.

Baby Daddy!Miguel who rolled his eyes when your not-boyfriend-but-more-then-a-talking-stage guy finally arrived over three hours late with the wrong type of beer, seeing him come in with a pack of Bud Light when Miguel was strictly a Modelo man. “Accidentally” squeezing his hand a bit too tight when he shakes it.

Baby Daddy!Miguel who made sure to keep telling stories about you two from your time together, not sparing any details as he and all the guys/dads gathered around the grill while Miguel turned over the carne asada y Pollo asado he was grilling. Not even caring about the looks your new boy toy would throw at him. His best friend Peter and his brother Gabriel both shooting each other a knowing look.

Baby Daddy!Miguel who took the aux from Peter and switched the music over to his spanish playlist, totally not on purpose starting off with the song Que Malo from Bad Bunny, then immediately after the playlist start to play Eres Mía from Romeo Santos, you didn’t even have time to think about the song choices before Miguel dragged you over to dance per your daughter’s request.

—

“I’m sorry Peter, but if I have to hear you play it wasn’t me from shaggy again, I’ll lose it.” Miguel exasperated as he unplugged his friend's phone mid song, earning a protest from Peter, but Miguel just shook his head as he plugged his own phone. “You’ve placed that song at every function since we were 18.”

You couldn’t help but let out a small squeal of excitement as Bad Bunny took over the backyard. Singing along to the song as you pass around another round of drinks to the guys at the grill, completely oblivious to the subliminal message that Miguel was sending you as you recited Ñengo Flows part. A new modelo in each one of the guy’s hands (well except your talking stage, he had a Bud light), it seems that your new little friend didn’t seem to understand a lick of Spanish, the message of the song completely flying over his head as he nodded along to the beat mindlessly.

Once the song ended, the new one played, Eres Mía, your brows scrunched a bit at the sudden genre changing. You were in the middle of crossing the grass lawn to where Miguel’s phone was sitting next to the speaker to change it, when you suddenly felt the small fingers of your daughter’s hand dragging you back.

“Mami! Ma! Baile con Papi! I love it when you two dance to these songs.” She begged, you usually wouldn’t mind doing so when she asked you too, but since the guy you were talking to was here, it would feel awkward if he watched you dance something as intimate as bachata with your ex. (Mommy ! Mom! Dance with dad!)

“I-I don’t know Gabi-“ You started, once you finally stopped in front of Miguel, your face filled with a bit of confusion on what to do. Miguel noticed and waved his hand as if reassuring you it’s no big deal.

“He won’t care, right bud?” He said as he nodded towards your guest, but before he could say an answer Miguel’s hands were already wrapped around the small of your back, as he started to guide you through the dance.

You just decided to go along with it, it’s not a big deal right? It’s only one dance.

—

Part 2<

Part 4<

Not proofread.

Word count: 700

Taglist: @ginnysculture @mishaglass @wusyanamee @mangoslushcrush @queerponcho @bunnibitez @miguelzslvtz @migueloharastruelove @dahehow @sinners-98-world @othersideoftheparadise @toyfortoji @yeshajane @yvesbi

(If you Would like to be added pls say so, I’m sorry if I missed anyone lmk if I did!)

#Spotify #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o hara fanfic #miguel o'hara #miguel o’hara au #spiderman 2099 x reader #astv miguel #astv spiderman 2099 #miguel spiderverse #miguel ohara spiderman #miguel fanfic #miguel ohara blurb #miguel o’hara blurbs #miguel ohara #miguel ohara drabble #spiderman 2099 fanfic #bd!miguel #baby daddy!miguel

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biceratops7 · 9 months

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I’m gonna SCREAM-

We’ve already established as a fandom that Metatron could teach a masterclass on gas lighting, but I wanna talk about how he specifically validates the things Aziraphale cares for while simultaneously devaluing them under the surface.

First off, this moment?

Tells us everything we need to know. It sets the scene for exactly the games Metatron is playing. He makes Muriel feel important while openly insulting them (flat out calling them stupid), aka seamlessly reinforcing the idea that they’re less than to both them and anyone else in the room. He knows he can get away with this easily, he knows that Muriel, lonely, overlooked little Muriel, will be completely distracted by the fact that someone so important is taking an interest in them.

This is already horribly clever, but then later on you realize it’s doing even MORE heavy lifting when he appoints Muriel to run the bookshop. “See? What’s important to you is what’s important to me! I’ve graciously taken the time to ensure your beloved shop is looked after by Muriel. You know, the dim one!” …let’s suffice it to say he’s ensnared too birds with one net for this one, and that a pattern is already starting to arise.

So when Metatron says Gabriel came to Aziraphale because he’s a “natural leader” and “doesn’t just tell people what they wanna hear”? Yah he’s full of shit. Aziraphale struggles with his sense of purpose when he doesn’t have someone or something guiding him, and for thousands of years he’s been terrified of sharing his true feelings and opinions to 90% of people he’s known. Completely just trying to butter him up. Wanna know the real reason Gabriel seeks asylum with Aziraphale?

Exactly this. Gabriel just says so point blank. It’s not because Aziraphale is this person for him, it’s because despite knowing nothing, he has this instinct that Aziraphale is the only one who can possibly understand why Gabriel did what he did. He is, I mean as far as we know, the only other angel who has fallen in love. (In general, let alone with a demon.)

But nope, can’t have that. We can throw the promise of restoring Crowley in the mix to sweeten the pot, but we can’t acknowledge why he’d want that so badly in the first place. So now it’s cause they work so well together. We can praise the angel for the fallen archangel Gabriel himself coming to him protection and guidance, give him a gold star. But we couldn’t DARE imply that it was by virtue of Aziraphale’s courage to choose earthly love over heavenly. How Gabriel didn’t need a leader, but a friend who’s truly known the joys of adoring that “particular person” and the pain of needing to hide it.

Cause then Aziraphale would start getting crazy ideas, like that his silly little human feelings have a great deal of worth. That they have the power to inspire, form cracks in the institution, fundamentally weaken what has controlled and harmed him. We wouldn’t want him to know the true value of the cards he holds when he has the ace in a match against you, now would we? After all…

Metatron uses this ingeniously sinister tactic of taking away Aziraphale’s choice while giving the illusion that he’s actually opening up doors. Notice how he tells Aziraphale he would have the authority to do something as extraordinary as turn a demon into an angel, yet he never once puts the much simpler alternative of just working with a demon on the table? The sleight of hand here is that he’s being offered the opportunity to freely be with Crowley… but he’s already freely with him as is, no bargain to be made. In fact he fought to be. Metatron disappears this accomplishment right before our eyes, while seamlessly maintaining the illusion to Aziraphale that he (Zira) is in control.

He sets Aziraphale up for failure by only providing the option he knows Crowley will not only decline but be deeply hurt by. It’s all so cleverly planned. Once this plays out exactly how he wants, he delivers the finishing blow by diminishing Crowley and his “damned fool questions”. Suddenly doing a complete 180 and emphasizing how foolish and troublesome he is. Metatron was offering Crowley by Aziraphale’s side as The Carrot. Now he’s telling Aziraphale it was stupid of him to want The Carrot, un-heavenly.

Aziraphale’s life, love, happiness, it’s all not only a massive inconvenience for Metatron but a liability. He has successfully taken a weapon from Aziraphale’s hands he didn’t even know he had. Metatron sees the writing on the wall, and he wants it contained.

#THE southern pansy doesn’t even realize he’s about to start a jod damn revolution #quick! annihilate his self esteem so he doesn’t start making people sniff out the bullshit on PURPOSE #good omens #ineffable husbands #season 2 #2x06 #meta #analysis #aziraphale #crowley #Muriel #metatron #Renew good omens #biceratops #Gabriel #ineffable bureaucracy

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dalliancekay · 2 months

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The 'Aziraphale Still Believes in Heaven' Take

Is one that I see so often. Too often. The way many fans (still) say Aziraphale is so naïve, he's never learned anything, he never changes, Metatron just offered him a promotion and he happily jumped on it. Happy to go back to Heaven. Still in their clutches. Leaving Crowley behind. Cos nothing lasts forever. Amirite? Poor long-suffering Crowley. So patient. Goes through so much. Aww. Takes that say that because Crowley never told Aziraphale about the venom in Gabriel's "Shut your stupid mouth and die already", Aziraphale has no idea that Heaven is not the good guys, that he still believes they are on the side of truth and light.

Takes that claim Aziraphale wants Crowley to come to Heaven and be an angel again so they can be happy like in the good old times. Takes that basically say that Aziraphale is stupid. And blind. LISTEN Do you mean this Aziraphale:

Who knew before Crowley did that something is rotten in the state of Denmark, that things are wrong and one can get in a lot of trouble for a thing as minor as a suggestion to improve things. Is this the Aziraphale that would seriously suggest to Crowley, who he was immediately deeply anxious over, to go back to 'good old times'? What good old times? How is Heaven a place of light when:

A bunch of angels comes down to Earth to bully and PUNCH ONE OF THEIR OWN?

Why would he think they are the light when they shame him for being who he is?

Yes, I HC is that ultimately, Aziraphale still believes in God, in Her inherent goodness, even if Her tasks were often odd... and not lining up with what he thought was right. He thinks (remember my own HC) something somewhere went wrong with the what She wanted and the how it was understood and executed. And yes, Aziraphale wants to do good. But that's not tied to him being an angel. And it's not a bad thing ffs! Crowley does good as well. Aziraphale might be the only one who knows, but he knows. Maybe getting humans out of the Garden to seek knowledge was always a (certainty) possibility, and maybe not, but it was Aziraphale's decision to arm them.

And She didn't make him Fall for it. And do you remember when:

Aziraphale first openly questioned that Heaven was actually doing what God actually wanted? He had a think after the Flood, didn't he. He did what he thought was right. He trusted Crowley over his fellow angels, with his own sense of rightness. He and Crowley saved the kids that Aziraphale triple checked the Archangels saw no problem in letting die to make things easier. And She didn't make him Fall for it. In Edinburgh:

Az re-evaluated the thinking he was taught and did a full 180 degree turn, trying in few hours to save the grave-robbing girl AND the possible future lives of children that could be helped via more learning. And when we come to Metatron and his threats, we don't see the full conversation, but don't we see enough? Aziraphale says that he's not interested. Metatron keeps nagging at him. Pushing the symbolic coffee from Coffee or Death at him. Flattering him with obvious untruths. After all, Aziraphale knows what Heaven thinks of him. He tried to reason with Metatron before. Metatron tells him they know how deep his disobedience lies:

Aziraphale is not a fool. He knows this is an offer of come quietly or we will find a way to destroy you and your demon this time. Aziraphale didn't have to hear Metatron's quip of: "For one prince of Heaven to be cast into the outer darkness makes a good story. For it to happen twice, makes it look like there is some kind of institutional problem." He knows the system is rotten. He knows for a LONG time. Did you see his face when he met Muriel and realised what a lonely sad existence they lead.

AND Crowley doesn't love Aziraphale despite the fact that he's being used to get out of trouble, being made to listen about random things the angel enjoys from symphonies to food and plays, and who continues to believe in goodness and kindness. CROWLEY LOVES AZIRAPAHLE BECAUSE OF THOSE THINGS AND because he sees Aziraphale for what he is, an angel who thinks for himself, changes his mind, learns, angel who is brave, who stands for the right thing, who sacrifices his own happiness for the safety of others, especially the demon he loves. They are the same. They are lonely. They are one of a kind. And they love each other.

Aziraphale wants to stay at home. In the home he built for himself and Crowley. On Earth where he's found so much to love. But he knows it is impossible. As Crowley confesses his love, Aziraphale struggles to stay on his plan to push him away, to make him stay. He'll miss Crowley terribly. He wants them to be together. For him, they were an 'us' the whole S2. However tenuously. Fragile existence and all that.

But even this was ripped away from him. And whatever he's planning, he knows he needs to do the first steps on his own. He can't submit Crowley to the torture that being in Heaven is going to be for him, an unwanted, despised angel. And that would be even worse for an unwanted demon. He had to push him away.

So he leaves. Furious. And determined. Whether it is to burn the place down or find God and ask Her all the questions to Her face I don't know. But his love will push him through.

And if I see one more simplistic take of the snarky demon is really good isn't he, so that means the stuffy angel is bad (and needs to change to be worthy of the demon) I will curse their dreams with lines about shades of grey. AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY ALREADY LOVE EACH OTHER

#good omens #aziraphale #crowley #ineffable husbands #aziracrow #neil gaiman #good omens 2 #ineffable divorce #good omens thoughts #aziraphale my beloved #aziraphale is such a bastard #aziraphale defense squad #good omens meta #hc #the final fifteen #season 2 #kaypost

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esmedelacroix · 3 months

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Miguel As A "Boy Dad" !

boydad!miguel o'hara who isn't afraid to shower his son with love ♥︎

Miguel And Your Baby Bump ! ← previous part ♥︎

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️

boydad!miguel o'hara who would come home from work late to find his baby boy surprising him by walking up to him for the first time. He felt a little sting in his heart because he couldn’t be there to watch his first steps but seeing Gabriel smiling ear to ear and greeting him made him feel much better. “Come here my love,” Miguel would say he crouched down with his arms spread out he would scoop up Gabriel, and smother him in kisses.

boydad!miguel o'hara who will always be the one to get up whenever Gabriel has a nightmare. “Daddy?… I had a bad dream,” you hear your son’s quiet teary voice call out with your door cracked open a smidge letting in the light from the hallway. Miguel slowly gets up as you sit up as well. “Go back to sleep Cariño[honey] I got it,” Miguel would whisper softly giving your head a soft pat.

boydad!miguel o'hara who would hold his little boy’s hand while walking him back to his room. The next morning you would wake up seeing that Miguel hadn’t come back to your room. You would peep into Gabriel’s room to see him and Miguel cuddled up on his Lightning McQueen bed. Miguel's body being far too big for the bed making you laugh to yourself hearing his soft snores.

boydad!miguel o'hara who would always take note of the things that Gabriel liked. Gabriel liked Hot Wheels? Miguel would come with a whole race track. Gabriel liked Star Wars? He would plan a family costume for Halloween. Gabriel liked Legos? Miguel would randomly come home with a Lego Death Star for them to build.

boydad!miguel o'hara who was always so protective of Gabriel when the two of you found out he was allergic to peanuts. He always checked everything before he ate them. The two of you also wiped all peanut products out of the house. Miguel always has his Epi pen wherever they go.

boydad!miguel o'hara who helped Gabriel make his first crush a Valentine. He went out late at night and got candy and arts and crafts supplies so they could make a handmade card for his crush. “What if she doesn’t like me back?" Gabriel asked worriedly. "How could she not like you back? You’re a nice boy and you look just like your mother, which makes you the most handsome boy in the world because your mom is the most beautiful in the world, he explained giving Gabriel a pat on the back as he left for school.

boydad!miguel o'hara who always went to his son's events and supported him whether it be his baseball games or the musicals that he was in. Miguel took time to practice with him in your front yard and took you Gabriel to see your favorite productions on Broadway. Miguel was convinced Gabriel would be a famous musical theater actor.

boydad!miguel o'hara who would document Gabriel's life from his first "Dada" to his first baseball game, all the way to his first musical, the time he came out to his family, and his wedding where he married his awesome husband.

boydad!miguel o'hara who went all out every Pride Month all throughout Gabriel's high school career after he came out to the family. Nothing made Miguel happier than the fact that Gabriel felt comfortable coming out to the two of you as his parents. He felt the most accomplished as a father knowing that his son felt like he could tell him anything.

boydad!miguel o'hara who loves his son unconditionally.

‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️⋅🍼𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ☾.‧₊˚ ☁️

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oval3000 · 6 months

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Chapter 4

Yandere Psych Patient König x Nurse reader

Warning: Possesive, Obsession, Death, Gore, Blood, Smut, Toxic behavior, age gap. Assault.

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

-------------------------------------------------------

"I don't like this," Jacob rubbed his for head, giving a few scratches. His hand on his hip with a slump posture. His eyes were giving out with annoyance and tiredness, not from the labor work, but from the system.

The fellow nurse could give an eye roll after seeing what was happening. "Anything to save some money, right?"

Mr. Miller ordered that half of the guards on the fifth floor would go to other floors to cover other shifts of guards that quit and who were..laid off. Those 20,000 thousand dollars couldn't come out from thin air as to what Mr. Miller thought it would, so it was the only option, to send some guards home.

Meaning that other guards from other floors had to move around and, unfortunately, your floor was affected by this.

The two guards that were on König, left as well as four others.

Things have now changed, your safety may now be a risk. But to to be quite honest with you, your safety is nothing to be worried about.

You did your morning rounds, assisted where there is needed. During their lunch, you heard the main phone ring from the floor. Jacob picked it up, "this is Jacob. Yes, sir. Okay...yeah...no problem." He hung up the phone taking a deep breath. He walked behind you and tapped on your shoulder. You turned your head away from the computer, "Mr. Miller wants to see you in his office."

You felt a big tull on your stomach. You were nervous. He never called you in his office before and with everything that is going on, you could only imagine worse.

Is he going to fire you?

You can't loose this job, the pay is good. You can't pack and move again to find something better.

You headed down to his office in a bit of a hurry, you didn't want to miss their lunch round check ups. You knocked on the brown wooden door with his name ingraved on a gold platter.

"Come in." You entered into his office and saw him sitting as his usual chair, writing whatever he is writing on a piece of paper. He stood up, fixing his suit. Mr. Miller, about the age of 50. Still has a grown set of hair only it's shown to have some grey strand hairs peaking through. 6 feet 3 inches maybe. Looks a bit fit, lackes muscles though. His light beard with a few grey strands of hair that follows the shape of his long jawline.

You saw photos that are in his office. Paintings of mountains and oceans. You saw his degree in psychology and business on a sharp, dark, brown, frame hanged up on the cream wall.

"Is there something wrong, sir?" You questioned standing behind the two chairs aligned perfectly in front of his desk. You hoped that he doesn't fire you. You can't hit rock bottom. Not now after everything.

"No, I just wanted to check up on you. I also wanted to apologize for the way I reacted towards you during the Gabriel incident. It was really unprofessional of me to do so. You were just doing your job, I'm sorry." He creeped in closer to you. You felt uncomfortable, a bad vibe coming off from him. He placed his hand on your shoulder, gripping it lightly. "If you need anything, my office is always open for you."

You swallowed the little bit of saliva, taking a step away from him, but it only brought him closer to you.

You panicked. You looked around to see if anyone, anyone at all can see, but nothing. The door is shut, the window blinds are closed. "It's okay sir, I should get going."

You turned around to walk away, but you felt his hands on your arm, pulling away in. "You look adorable playing hard to get"

Your eyes widen. You felt absolute frozen. "Sir. Let go of me!" He dragged you in front of his desk. The movement was so sudden, you couldn't say anything. "Please sir."

He gripped your shoulders tight that you couldn't move. You felt his body pressed against you. You felt his hips pushing in deeper. You couldn't help, but to let tears fall from your eyes. You felt so frozen that you hated yourself. This couldn't be happening to you.

You honestly wished he called you in to fire you. His body completely compressed to yours making you bend over on his desk. His hands roamed your body. His cold hands went inside your scrub shirt. You shook at his touch with fear. "No!Please! Stop!"

"You feel so good " he cupped your breast, pulling under your bra to get a better touch. Eventually his one hand left one of your breast and it landed on your ass. You heard the sound of his belt unbuckling and his zipper being pulled down. He gripped onto your scrub pants and pulled them down, including your underwear, showing your naked vagina. "Fuck. I should've fucked you along time ago."

"Please! Please! Stop! Let go of me!" You cried out, feeling his finger pressed on your area.

A beeping sound came from his phone, "Sir, you have a call coming in. It's from the CEO."

"You gotta be fucking kidding me." He finally let go. He yanked your body closer to him. He cupped your face with his hand. You felt his disgusting breath near your mouth. "If you tell anyone about this. I'll ruin your fucking life. You got that."

You nodded as he aggressively let go, making you fall a bit on his desk. You felt so humiliated while pulling up your scrub pants and fixing your bra. You were about to walk out when he said, "Oh and make sure no one sees you like that. Get yourself fixed."

You didn't bother turning to him. You walked about quickly and ignoring the staff by not making eye contact. You pressed the button for the elevator, which felt like an eternity to arrive. Never felt like hours waiting for the elevator. Thankfully, no one was there, it was just you. You pressed on the fifth floor button.

You wanted to vomit. You scrunched your face as the tears fell down your cheeks. You covered your mouth trying hard to cover your sobs. Even though you are alone in the elevator, you felt embarrassed. You took deep breaths as it was reaching near the floor. You wiped away as much tears as you can. Even so you know your eyes and nose are red and puffy.

You avoided eye contact with everyone. You prayed that no one will come up to you ask why Mr. Miller called you down to his office. You grabbed the medical cart with the things you need and quickly went to each patients room, the last one being Königs.

You jiggle the kids, the guards left for you, to open his door. You swang the door a bit open and back inside his room. You grabbed the tray with his medication and placed it down on top of the cart. König watched you. He knew something was wrong.

You raised your head up, feeling the tears forming again. You hated yourself for not stopping the tears from coming out. Not now. Not when you are doing your job.

But you couldn't help it. You covered your face as tears were running down your face. You didn't want to cry in front of a patient, nevertheless, König.

He quickly got up and took your arm to pull you closer to him. He sat back down on his bed with his legs spread a bit to let you in closer to him. He couldn't see your face, which was still buried in your hands. If you could see his eyes, the look he's giving you. The same look he gave to the people he wanted to kill, to his enemies in the battle field. "What happened, schatz?" his thick accent was hard and impactful. You uncovered your face to see him, for him to see you. He saw the tears, the redness in your eyes.

The sympathetic look he gave you made those tears flowing again. Being comfort is not something you're use to. Your always dealing with everything by yourself.

He palmed your cheek, wiping your tears away. You shook your head lightly. You can't tell him. He's your patient. You can't tell your patient is a psychiatric hospital that you were almost raped by your boss. "Bitte tell me."

"H-he....touched me." You stared away, but his other palm touched your cheek, making you to look at him.

You saw the stare he gave you. Filled with sympathy and anger. "He. Touched. You."

You nodded. "He trapped me in his office. He was going to rape me. If he didn't get that phone call, he would've-." Your words turned into sobs.

He got up and pulled you into a tight hug. Your head was buried into his chest, letting out your quiet sobs.

He held you tight and close. His hand rubbing your back while the other was petting your head. "Shhh..it's okay, schatz. It's okay."

He turned his head towards the slight, opened, door. His way to freedom. Your freedom.

Away from this. From every assholes that's here. Away from everyone else.

"Mein liebling. Mach dir keine Sorgen. Ich werde ihn töten. Ich werde jeden töten, der dir wehtut. (My darling. don't worry. ill kill him. I'll kill anyone that hurts you.) " he gripped you tight. He doesn't want to let you go. He wants you to be attached to him. For you to share everything of his. "Mine," he whispered. "All mine."

#cod modern warfare #cod mw2 #cod x reader #fanfic #yandere #yandere konig #yandere könig #könig mw2 #konig x reader #konig #könig x reader #könig cod #könig call of duty #könig #könig x y/n

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jazeswhbhaven · 3 months

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Hello!! I'm not so sure if you've done something similar, but could I request a headcanon for the kings + lucifer and the seraphims on how they react if MC doesn't like getting carried and even if they try to carry them they're just trying to break free and doing shits to make it ”impossible” to carry them and to like avoid it because they think they're heavy? Thank you!!

Hi anon, thank you for waiting! I haven't done anything like this before so yay :D Let's start with our seraphim first <3 Michael: He only needed to carry MC because they were walking too slow, he's got places to be. MC refuses, shoving his arms away and even sitting down on the ground to say they'd wait for him to come back instead. After two minutes of arguing, he scoops them up anyway and throws them over his shoulder while they hold on for dear life thinking they'd fall. Wait...is he f l y i ng????!!!

Gabriel: He's only managed to get his arms around them before MC literally scratches his arm trying to tell him to put them down. This surprises the angel so much that he makes it a goal now to pick them up. MC will have their arms wrapped around whatever object they can, everyone else looking at the two of them bickering in the street over Gabe trying to carry them to prove a point. He does give up eventually.

Raphael: He doesn't take no for an answer, scooping up MC in bridal style and smirking. "See, light as a feather." MC at this point is shoving his face away and demanding they be put down immediately but this angel likes teasing MC in anyway possible. After a few curses and face shoves he does put them down and plans on doing it again later.

Satan: He loves getting an opportunity to attempt carrying MC, only because they chew him out so much. There was one time where MC bit him, and well...let's just say they made it worse for themselves in the end, being that he picked them up anyway, carried them to his room and neither of them came back out for hours. *wink*

Mammon: He's so used to being beat up by Satan that MC's hits on his massive chest mean nothing as he picks them up. However, after hearing out MC, Mammon doesn't carry them anymore. Instead he has other things carry MC, as in a custom floating chair powered by one of his AIs. He simply just doesn't think his Master should have to walk is all when Tartaros. Beelzebub: He only attempts to pick up MC as a form of teasing. He likes to see them try and make their weight heavy so he can't pick them up, he'll even pretend he's struggling or is about to drop them. But he will playfully laugh, leaving MC alone after they start to make a serious face (which is one of his favorite faces of theirs) Leviathan: MC doesn't have to worry about this king too much on picking them up and carrying them. He simply refuses stating that they can walk and he shouldn't have to 'baby' them. But there was one time during an attack on Hades, where an angel targeted MC and that was the only time MC was carried, indirectly by a series of tentacles that Levi summons.

Lucifer: He doesn't really understand why MC insists so much that they don't like be carried. Especially when they injure themselves. Luci does respect their wishes, but doesn't take no for an answer when they're badly hurt, scooping them up and carrying them bridal style to Morax's office to be healed. Not much MC can say when there's blood running down their leg and it hurts like hell.

#whb #what in hell is bad #jwhbasks❓#whb kings👑#whb gabriel #whb michael #whb raphael #haha i'm the type of person that also doesn't like to be carried because i think ppl will drop me #ppl will still attempt tho

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nightgoodomens · 7 months

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Imagine Crowley taking the Duke of Hell job because he finds out that Metatron manipulated Aziraphale’s memories to hate Crowley and to want another war.

Crowley’s only way to get him back and try to fix him is to take the top job on the other side, so he can have enough demons to storm Heaven.

He even has Beelzebub and Gabriel on his side. Crowley does show to be a fantastic Duke and demons do actually follow him.

They manage to start a fight in Heaven, Crowley doesn’t actually want it to end up in a bloodbath, so he rushes out to catch Aziraphale.

Aziraphale, with his eyes purple, in all white, zero charm and happiness on his face. He looks at Crowley with so much hate it makes him stop for a moment.

But he prepared for this. The demons make enough of a chaos, like he asked them to, to make everyone busy and not focus on him and Aziraphale. Crowley dodges nearly every single hit from Aziraphale’s sword, and he finally manages to grab his wrist, shoving his arm down so the sword hits the floor.

In the same second he puts his claws on top of his head and takes the spell off him. Aziraphale blinks and his eyes are blue again. He looks shocked at Crowley but there is a relief on his face and adoration, not hate anymore.

“What…” He drops his sword as if it burned him. “Did I…” He looks terrified at the wound on Crowley’s cheek.

“It’s nothing. We need to go.” Crowley grasps him by the shoulders. “Now.”

Aziraphale doesn’t know what’s going on, but the fact that he doesn’t is enough to tell him that he needs to leave.

But Crowley is suddenly shoved forward and Aziraphale hears as he suddenly chokes on air painfully. He looks at him and his face is white and eyes scared. They both look down and the sword that was on the floor moments ago is now piercing through his back and coming out of his chest.

Aziraphale can see over Crowley’s shoulder that Metatron is staring at them, hand still raised.

“Crowley…” Aziraphale catches him when his knees buckle underneath him. “Crowley!”

“Go!” Crowley chokes out but Aziraphale is cradling him in his arms, not listening to a word.

“No…” Aziraphale panics as he can see the light disappearing from his eyes quickly. He puts his hand on his chest trying to use a miracle to get rid of the sword and heal the wound.

Metatron is coming closer.

“Let the demon go!” His voice is strong and it makes Aziraphale’s head hurt. As if someone is drilling in his brain again.

“No.” He keeps his hand on Crowley’s chest, his brain on fire. “I will save you.” He whispers to Crowley who’s pleading him with his eyes and Aziraphale knows it’s not for his life. It’s for Aziraphale’s.

Run, he’s trying to say, but the blood pours from his mouth.

“LET THE DEMON GO!”

“NO!” Aziraphale sneers so loudly and his voice doesn’t sound like his. “GO TO HELL!” He wonders if his horrified heart makes his voice sound so unearthly.

Crowley needs to live. He’s NOT letting him go!

Metatron stops shocked and for a moment Aziraphale wonders if this is how it’s done. A simple go to hell from a Supreme Archangel to make a fellow angel fall. Then he realises Metatron is looking terrified… at Crowley.

Crowley, with his sharp black claws, with his hand, slim and covered in blood, pointed towards Metatron.

“You’ve heard what he said.” Crowley’s voice doesn’t sound like his either, Aziraphale decides.

It’s devil’s voice.

A long hiss fills the air.

“You can’t make me fall.” Metatron says confidently. “God is on my side.”

Crowley laughs and more blood pours from his mouth and Aziraphale notices his eyes are red. He still holds him tightly. He only sees Crowley.

“God has forsaken you, Metatron.”

Aziraphale recognises Satan’s voice.

Even when it’s coming out of Crowley’s mouth.

Metatron looks horrified and then his wings burn and he screams.

He falls, in front of them, his wings on fire and they hear him until he’s too far down to see.

Aziraphale sees the red disappearing from Crowley’s eyes and he loses consciousness, body left lifeless in his arms.

“Crowley…!”

He’s never, in his whole life, begged for anything more. Time stops when he pulls the sword out of his back with his hand, lies Crowley on the floor, kneels over him and places both his hands on his chest.

He begs God to bring him back. Puts all his power, everything he knows to bring him back. Begs and begs and begs; and nothing happens.

He can feel the anger building in him and his cheeks are wet from his tears as he looks at Crowley who’s suddenly small and pale and so… gone.

So he prays to Satan too.

Bring him back.

He is your child, God.

He is your Prince, Satan.

Give. Him. Back!

And to his shock, suddenly there is white and black smoke coming out of his hands. He knows it’s Heaven and Hell.

It’s both God and Satan.

It surrounds Crowley’s chest and he sees the bleeding stopping.

And Crowley suddenly breathes again.

“Crowley!” Aziraphale cries out and brings him back in his arms. “Thank you, thank you, thank you!” He is crying while rocking them lightly back and forth. “You’re going to be okay.”

Aziraphale does not care about anything, but Crowley’s steady breathing in his arms.

He doesn’t see the shocked faces of demons and angels.

And he doesn’t know that somewhere, far, far away, God and Satan cheer to each other, wine in both glasses, satisfaction clear on their faces.

#yes this will be a full fic #good omens #crowley #ineffable fandom #good ineffable omens #ineffable husbands #ineffable boyfriends #ineffable dumbasses #ineffable idiots #ineffable lovers #aziraphale #aziracrow

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httpiastri · 3 months

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sweet 20 – pa17

genre: hmmm kinda fluffy a lil suggestive, idk

pairing: reader x paul aron

warnings: mentions of alcohol.... idk anything else

word count: 1.3k

author's note: hmmmm idk about this one 😭 writer's block has been so bad recently and when i pressure myself to write, it all just gets so bad. idk. also ive had such a long day and i just wanna get this out before the day is over..... and it's only been proofread once 😕 anyway, hbd again paul <3

‎‎ ‎‎ ‎

"where did the birthday boy go?" dino's loud voice meets your ears over the blasting music and you turn to the side, seeing the swede making his way to you. "i almost mistook the two of you for siamese twins, seeing how close you've been all night."

he is right – paul has been pretty much attached to your hip for most of the evening. his hands have been on you at all times, fingers constantly dancing across your skin or along the fabric of your dress. even in a club filled with his friends, with people who would love to spend some time with the birthday boy, he still wouldn't let go of you.

"he needed to use the bathroom," you tell him with a chuckle. "i just barely managed to pry his fingers off me so he could leave me here, i didn't really feel like being pulled along."

dino laughs. "good call. the bathrooms here are pretty nasty..."

"yeah, i've seen the women's bathrooms, so i can imagine what the men's is like." he gives you an acknowledging nod. silence falls over the two of you for a moment as he just sips his drink, but then you speak up. "hey, good job at planning this all. paul was really surprised-"

"what was i surprised about?" paul's voice echoes from behind you, and just as you're about to turn to look at him, you feel two strong arms wrap around you, keeping you in place. "hm?"

"this surprise party," you tell him. "you really had no idea, did you?"

"no idea." he rests his chin on top of your shoulder, leaning his head on yours slightly. his voice grows quieter. "i missed you, you know."

"you missed me? when, now?" paul nods against your shoulder, and you look to dino with a grimace. he answers with a shake of his head, rolling his eyes at his best friend. "you left to go to the bathroom about two minutes ago."

paul hums. "but i still missed you."

you've almost never seen him this clingy. it's only when he gets a couple of drinks down that he's like this – and tonight, he's definitely had more than his share of the open bar. the strong smell oozing from him signals that the hangover will be bad. hopefully, it's worth it.

"i'm going to go find gabriele," dino says to excuse himself, disappearing in just a second.

you turn around in paul's arms, a smile creeping onto your lips when you see the very hazy expression on his face. "hi there," you say, pressing a quick kiss to his nose.

"hi there."

you pause for a second, but then you get an idea. you move your hands to wrap around his forearms. "i want to dance."

he shakes his head instantly. "you've seen me dance before, no way am i embarrassing myself in front of all these people."

"come on," you groan, pulling yourself out of his embrace to take his hands in yours. "it's your birthday, so you have to dance." he's about to interject, so you cut him off, beginning to back towards the dance floor. "i'm not taking no for an answer."

his mouth opens as if he has something to say back, but then he closes it, thinking better of it. he allows you to pull you with him, and the music envelops you the moment you step onto the dance floor. you can feel the bass inside your bones, and the lights overhead flash in an array of colors, casting a vibrant glow over the crowd. paul follows you reluctantly, his expression a mix of hesitance and amusement. after all, a gorgeous woman is dragging him with her to dance with him. how can he not be at least a little intrigued?

the atmosphere out there is contagious, and you can't help but caught up in the energy. moving with the flow of the crowd underneath the lights feels so natural to you – but paul isn't the same. he loves partying, sure, but the dancing itself...

he doesn't even notice his own lack of energy before you reach up to give his face a playful slap. "hey, ease up."

his eyebrows rise. "lead me, then..."

you can't help but let out a giggle at the request; underneath this tough, firm exterior hides a soft, sweet guy who's so insecure about his dancing that he freezes like this. of course, you help him out – it's your duty as his girlfriend, you think – and you place your hands on his shoulders. "grab my hips," you tell him. "and relax a little. this can't be any worse than driving your racing cars."

"it sure feels like it."

you shake your head. "now, just... move."

and that's what he does. you're not sure if it's because of the alcohol, or because his favorite the weeknd song is blasting from the speakers, but he's moving much more smoothly than he usually is.

or maybe it's your sweet smile that's encouraging him to keep on going.

as the song progresses, and then melts into another, paul seems to let go more and more. he actually dances surprisingly well – at one point, he even spins you, and you can't help but laugh at the unexpected skill.

the way that his hands move up and down your sides, sometimes slipping behind you to give your butt a quick squeeze, combined with the intoxicating scent of his cologne, makes your heart flutter even further. it seems to have an effect on paul too, because he pulls you closer to him. your eyes meet his, and for a moment, it feels like the world slows down. the desire in his gaze is unmistakable, and the intensity of the connection between the two of you is easily noticeable to anyone within a mile's radius.

he leans forward, lips grazing your ear as he whispers to you. "let's get out of here."

you lean back with a frown on your face, looking at him like he's crazy. "this is your party. all of your friends are here-"

"fuck my friends, i don't care about them." you slap his shoulder playfully, a gasp passing through your lips. "all i want is you."

"you're insatiable, you know that?"

he shrugs. "what can i say? you're irresistible."

you shake your head. now it's your turn to lean forward and whisper into his ear. "later," you start, giving his cheek a little kiss. "patience, my dear."

he groans. "i can't be patient. i think you know that by now."

"too bad. you haven't even had any cake yet." you grin. "or opened your presents."

"i only know of one gift that i want to unwrap..." he says, fingers reaching traveling lower on your dress and eventually reaching the hem, giving it a slight tug.

yet another giggle slips past your lips, but then you catch a glimpse of something behind him – and your gaze is different when you look back at him. you lean in closer, pressing your body up against his as your arms wrap around his neck, pulling his face closer to yours. your lips brush against him once, ever so slightly, and his breath hitches in his throat. is she actually about to give in?

"sorry to disappoint, but..."

timing has never really been on paul's side; he's always been unlucky in that way. even on his own birthday, things don't seem to work out for him – because just as he thinks he's getting somewhere, you suddenly pull away. his confusion only grows when the music is shut off and replaced with the sound of the entire club singing the birthday song. you point behind him, and he turns around to see a few of his friends carrying a big birthday cake, twenty lit candles perched on top of it.

"happy birthday," you whisper, and he shakes his head when he looks back at the teasing grin stretched across your lips.

"you're killing me. you know that, right?"

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ao3cassandraic · 9 months

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Kayfabe: A Good Omens meta

"Kayfabe," in wrestling, is the performance (including outside the wrestling ring) of whatever storyline is being woven around the wrestlers. Breaking kayfabe is Serious Business for a wrestler; the illusion is part of the event. If you ever wondered how John Cena could anchor an entire HBO miniseries brilliantly, kayfabe is a big part of the answer.

Because of their histories and how their respective Head Offices treat them, Crowley and Aziraphale approach their version of kayfabe -- their whole "I am an angel! You are a demon! We're hereditary enemies!" schtick, also their "we are good bad proper little footsoldiers, honest, Boss" schtick to their respective Head Offices -- very, very differently.

I promise there's a point to this. I PROMISE. But let me walk through it first.

Both of them know that one awkward question to Upstairs at the wrong moment and its Fallsville. Crowley, however, knows a couple of things that Aziraphale doesn't have to:

Punishment isn't just once; in some ways, the Fall is never over. Beelzebub or Hastur can throw you in the Dung Pits whenever, after all, or feed you to a Hellhound, or zap you like an Eric. Crowley's lot do not send rude notes. (s2: we do not know what happened to Crowley after Hell dragged him back at the end of the Resurrectionists 'sode, but I think it safe to say it was not great for Crowley. Litotes: your key to quality meta.)

Downstairs can and does check in -- or drag Crowley Downstairs for a chat and possibly a bit of idle torture -- whenever they feel like it. Downstairs seems pretty disorganized, especially its leadership, so I'd expect ad-hoc surprise inspections from them. Downstairs can invade Crowley's flat's TV, his Bentley's radio, and his very mind to perform those inspections. Crowley is never, ever safe from this. He can't relax. Ever.

Heaven, on the other hand, has 37 levels of scriveners and zero interest in Earth. Talk of "reprimands" and "miracle budgets" and Michael being a stickler and whatnot suggests a formal review process happening on a schedule, governed largely by the dreaded (but quite possibly fake-able or spinnable) "paperwork" rather than direct observation by Aziraphale's peers or superiors. Otherwise, Aziraphale is usually left to his own devices. Remember how startled he is when Gabriel shows up at the sushi restaurant in s1? This is unusual!

(We also know from Muriel that Heaven's records office doesn't seem to get consulted a whole lot. It's possible this just means that first-through-thirty-sixth-level scriveners handle everything, but in my experience of large bureaucracies, it's the folks at the bottom of the hierarchy who invariably get run off their feet first. Don't see why Heaven would be any different.)

Moreover, Heaven's punishments seem pretty light, on the whole? Our angel is so anxious and so sensitive to slights that I'm sure the reprimands aren't fun, and nobody likes a reduced miracle budget... but Heavenly "needs improvement" reviews don't seem to be a patch on the Dung Pits. The real threat is Falling, which is more than horrible enough to serve as deterrent; Heaven doesn't need to add torments.

Moreover moreover, Aziraphale is mostly aligned with his Head Office in a way that Crowley really, really isn't. I'm sure Aziraphale does a lot of his Heaven assignments with a song in his heart and a skip in his step -- it's mostly not smiting or the like. Crowley... probably spends a lot of his work time figuring out how to obey the letter of Hellish law while defying its spirit. Crowley's in far more danger of angering his bosses.

So Aziraphale doesn't have to keep up kayfabe a lot of the time, not even while interacting with Crowley. He can and does save it for the rare occasions Heaven takes a personal interest. Crowley, however, must keep up kayfabe always, whether Aziraphale's there or not. The courage it must have taken that snake to slither up the wall of Eden!

The way Crowley navigates his permanent need for kayfabe is twofold. First, his all but instinctive refusal to accept any positive word or compliment about himself or his actions from anyone ever -- "I'M NOT NICE!" If Hell were ever to hear someone characterizing Crowley that way... That's also why Crowley is a bit less exercised when Jimbriel calls him nice: "nobody'll ever believe you."

Second, a species of Orwellian doublethink: maintaining a running commentary in his head of how he's going to justify any unHellish actions to Hell, since he can never know exactly when he'll have to or what exactly they'll have a bug up their butt (sorry, Beez) about. Even high as a kite on laudanum in the Edinburgh cemetery, Crowley can explain his current justification (in a curiously sober voice -- is Crowley ever really high in that scene? or is it all kayfabe? I lean toward kayfabe) to Aziraphale, "Not kind! Off my head on laudanum, not responsible for my actions."

We can see the kayfabe mismatch play out a few times, and it does appear that Aziraphale gets more concerned for Crowley's safety and more aware of Crowley's need for kayfabe post-Arrangement. That doesn't mean he always remembers, of course -- he wouldn't, he just doesn't have that same desperate need. And, of course, the ineffable walnuts do not communicate, as s2 went to some lengths to point out. I do think kayfabe is part of that -- it's hard for Crowley to be sincere when he's constantly doublethinking, and Aziraphale's off-and-on involvement with kayfabe (and all his other tendencies toward lying) disincline him to achieve or even learn about honest communication.

One s1 scene I went back and rewatched while thinking about this was the Globe scene, which contains Aziraphale's Saint-Peter-esque three-time denial of Crowley. I find it easy now to read that as Aziraphale going "oh crap do I need to drop back into kayfabe now? I didn't break kayfabe, did I?" and Crowley grinning, at least partly as reassurance. (Partly, of course, because Aziraphale is cute and funny even when kayfabing -- and partly because Aziraphale's sudden drop into kayfabe is Aziraphale trying to protect Crowley, of course Crowley's pleased by that.)

The wall pin, now that I think about it, also gains a little nuance from this. Crowley's fear-laced ire is genuine, but how many times must Aziraphale have heard Crowley snarl at him not to break kayfabe in this way? No surprise he's a little unimpressed. (With Crowley's demand. He's clearly very impressed by Crowley.)

In the s2 Job minisode, Aziraphale hilariously drops kayfabe (and that epic whole-body halo, loved that, great job FX folks) almost immediately. Crowley allows it, because Crowley is on firm ground -- Hell will be just fine with Crowley wrapping the angel in a Chuck-Jones-cartoon amount of scroll parchment and flipping him off.

When angel and demon collude on the con later, of course, they observe kayfabe, improv-style -- Crowley helps Aziraphale deal with the Job's-children situation without giving either of them away to the watching angel posse. Interestingly, it's Aziraphale who de-gecko-izes the kids. That gives Crowley an out, sort of: "look, the mansion collapse missed them because they were in the cellar, I turned them into geckos, totally Hellish thing to do, they'd never survive in the wild, but then this bloody interfering angel went and changed them back!"

And how does Crowley console a distraught angel who thinks he's about to be dragged to Hell? Crowley explains kayfabe in the fewest and clearest words possible. "Well, yeah, you did, but... I'm not going to tell anybody. Are you?"

So yeah. That's kayfabe for the Ineffable Walnuts.

But I promised there was a point to this, didn't I? Yes, I have a point.

My point is...

my POINT is...

my point IS...

(not dolphins, not this time)

My point is, how much of s2's Final Fifteen Minutes is kayfabe?

That's my point.

#good omens season 2 spoilers #gos2spoilers #gos2 spoilers #ineffable husbands #ineffable walnuts #kayfabe #good omens meta #the point is not dolphins

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ineffablelunatics · 1 month

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Crowley’s Memory of Saraqael and Furfur

There’s a distinct parallel to be drawn from Crowley’s interactions with both Saraqael and Furfur. Both times, Crowley pretends that he doesn’t know who they are. Both times, the opposite party explains who they are to him in detail. But what are the differences?

Furfur. Furfur comes into the dressing room with just Crowley and Aziraphale. He tells Aziraphale that they’ve never met, but Crowley has met him. Furfur explains to Crowley that they were in the same legion before the Fall. Crowley says that he remembers going into battle, but not going into battle with Furfur. Furfur becomes agitated and explains how they fought together. Then says that it doesn’t matter, because Crowley broke the Infernal Code by consorting with an angel. Then the rest of the scene ensues. But why did Crowley say that he didn’t remember Furfur?

It was the only power that Crowley could show in the situation. If he lashed out immediately then Furfur knows for certain that he’s guilty. If Crowley acts like he doesn’t remember Furfur then it could be plausible that he didn’t know that Aziraphale was an angel. It’s plausible deniability. His status in Hell also helps with this. From what we know the lower demons wants to be him and the higher demons are annoyed by him. The lower demons know that he gets to work on Earth, almost for himself, but the higher ups don’t like that he acts indifferent and can be quite arrogant. So when Furfur comes saying that he’s broken some rules, Too Cool For Hell-Crowley starts answering, “Who are you? I can’t even remember who you are. How was I supposed to know he was an angel? Who cares?”

Saraqael. The first thing that Saraqael does is answer Crowley’s question to Muriel about Gabriel’s trial which he hadn’t even started to ask yet. They say his chosen name and then say that they didn’t think that they would ever see him again(not too affectionately but not hateful either). Crowley says that he doesn’t know them and it seems genuine. Saraqael says ‘when you were an angel; we worked together on the Horsehead Nebula.’ During this statement, they’re almost smiling, but then he answers that he meets a lot of people whilst laughing, and this annoys them(similar to Gabriel later). But did he actually remember them or not? If he doesn’t, why pretend?

I think Crowley remembers who they are after they mention the Horsehead Nebula. Simply, because he laughs. At first, he looked like there was a blank, but of course, a nebula would trigger his memory. If he remembers them or not, he has two options: tell them he knows them or tell them he doesn’t. Pretending that he remembered them would maybe give Saraqael a reason to trust him. If they trust him, maybe they will let him look at the file anyway. If he does the opposite, pretend he doesn’t know them(or maybe he really didn’t), then it almost looks more honest and trustworthy. For some reason, most of the angels don’t take the time to remember them whether Crowley knows that or not, up for debate. But if he really wanted to get into the file, then wouldn’t the best way to be making a friend like he did with Aziraphale? But for some reason, he knows that it isn’t. Because I really do think that if he had told them that he had remembered, they wouldn’t have believed him. I think either way, they were going to let him into the file. The archangels believed that Crowley and Aziraphale had more information. Yes, he got himself into the file and all that, but Saraqael didn’t try to smite him, and that means that he chose right.

Between these two interactions, Crowley acts very differently to the two people involved. To Furfur, he acts indifferent, but also agitated. He’s wearing his hat to his brow with his glasses on and he keeps his legs turned away from him. To Saraqael, he looks them in the eyes with glasses that are quite light, comparatively. He doesn’t turn away and he stays engaged. He even laughs. The first thing that Furfur brings up the War and the Fall. Two things I don’t believe Crowley likes to remember. The first thing Saraqael does is answer questions and reminds him about stars(some of Crowley’s favorite things). They don’t bring up the War or the Fall or even Eden. They bring up the fact that they worked together on the stars. I think he respected them for that.

So does he remember them? I think so. I think maybe that he was drawing a blank on Saraqael, because from what we see in Before The Beginning, Crowley was very absorbed in his work. So he might would need some specifics to help him out. Furfur, on the other hand, he might not have remembered, because he blocked him out, because he tried to block the Fall and the War out. Either way, it was plausible deniability on his part. My main reason for his memory being intact(perfect?no) is Muriel and Gabriel. When Gabriel is in the bookshop with just Crowley, they talked about gravity and he said that it seemed like a good idea when “we” were all talking about it. He also knows Muriel’s rank and class without them ever mentioning it prior. He also knows exactly what their job entails. He also remembers where Gabriel was pulling those lines from when he would “wake” up. Crowley seems like he has a handle on his memories. Now, could there be something wrong with them or did something happen to them? Were they fixed? Maybe, he walled some of them off like humans do. Either way, I’m excited to find out.

#good omens #good omens 2 #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #good omens spoilers #go2 #good omens speculation #david tennant #michael sheen #good omens meta #good omens furfur #good omens saraqael #theory #meta

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aziraphales-library · 3 days

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Hi there!

I was wondering if you had any recommendations of fics that have Aziraphale as a priest? i’m in search of some but have no idea how to find them.

only ask is that it’s 3k words and up!

Thanks so much for all you do, you are truly the foundation holding the fanfiction side of Good Omens together!

lots of love x

Hello! We have #priest Aziraphale & #priests au tags. And of course there is the priest Aziraphale tag on AO3. Here are more to add to our collection...

All The Lights That Light The Way by FeralTuxedo (E)

On the run from a disastrous work Christmas party, Anthony Crowley encounters an angel singing in the streets of Soho.

& Forgive Us Our Trespasses (Of Which The First Is Love) by ineffable_angle (M)

Fleabag-inspired AU where anthropologist Dr. Anthony J Crowley becomes friends (and then definitely more) with the hot priest Father Aziraphale Moore. They meet at their high school reunion and discover that they just can't quite stay away from one another. Mainly, they debate evolution, go to brunch, and overcome Anthony's religious trauma. Some scenes and dialogue from season 2 of Fleabag do show up, but the plot is not the exact same.

The scent of incense on his fingers by gimmewhiskey (E)

Crowley knew what was twirling on Aziraphale's tongue. “Don't even think about saying you forgive me," he whispered, then turned and strode quickly to the door. Aziraphale stared after him for a few moments longer. He slowly raised his hand and touched his lips. There was a scent of incense on his fingers. ...Or the story of how a successful lawyer Anthony J. Crowley successfully pretends to forget his old love while Father Aziraphale atones for sins for them both.

(Let's) Do it again by gagna_onni (M)

Father Fell has lived his whole life in a small town in Wales. His life is simple, the community is kind and welcoming and he does all he can to help everyone. One day a guest arrives at his clergy house. And right after his arrival, things start to change in an unexpected way.

in your own time by ineffabildaddy (E)

Aziraphale and Crowley grew up together as next-door neighbours on Hogback Lane, classmates at the local Catholic school, and inseparable best friends. By the age of eighteen, both were hopelessly in love with the other, despite the knowledge that they were doomed to live apart, as Crowley aimed to pursue university study in London and Aziraphale committed himself to remaining in Tadfield, dedicating his life to the Church. After almost twenty years spent away from his hometown, renowned botanist Crowley decides to come and visit Tadfield again at a moment's notice; the purpose of his visit is to speak at a Careers Day for the school he and Aziraphale, now a beloved priest and a frequent helper at the school, attended. The twenty-four hours that follow will change both of their lives for ever.

Faith, Hope, and Love (And the Greatest of These Is Love) by khh1961 (E)

A young Father Aziraphale Fell takes up his first post as a junior priest, under the stern supervision of Monsignor Gabriel (who very much likes things to run his way, thank you kindly) and meets fellow parish priest, Father Anthony Crowley. Our young Father Fell is immediately captivated by Father Crowley's handsome face, ginger hair, and dead sexy Scottish accent. This looks to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship. But what else it may become remains to be seen. Love and the will of God are both ineffable.

- Mod D

#good omens #ineffable husbands #human au #priest aziraphale #priests au #adult omens #mod d

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immaturityofthomasastruc · 4 months

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IOTA Reviews: Conformation and Re-Creation (The Final Day)

Well, here we are. The final two episodes of Season 5. It's been a long and complicated journey, so let me get you up to speed on what exactly happened this season, episode by episode.

Evolution: Ladybug and Cat Noir chase Monarch through time, and it's not nearly as cool as it sounds.

Multiplication: Adrien likes Marinette now because the plot says so.

Destruction: Cat Noir accidentally Cataclysms Monarch, and it somehow leads to the most guilt he feels using his Cataclysm on anyone.

Jubilation: Ever want to have the image of Ladybug and Cat Noir being teen parents burned into your brain? No? Too bad!

Illusion: Nino establishes himself as a leader so terrible, Zapp Brannigan would call him an idiot.

Determination: Marinette likes Cat Noir now because the plot says so.

Passion: Nathalie shows she'd rather silently judge Gabriel for his actions over actually doing anything to stop him.

Reunion: Marinette talks with the spirit of Joan of Arc, and it's not nearly as cool as it sounds.

Elation: Someone tries to murder Marinette over ice cream for the third time in four seasons.

Transmission: Yeah, I totally believe you're replacing Marinette and Adrien with two new main characters in the middle of your fifth season.

Deflagration: Because of Tikki and Plagg's terrible decisions, Monarch comes the closest he's ever come to winning.

Perfection: Kagami becomes a giant cloud Akuma, symbolizing her also becoming a total airhead for the rest of the season.

Migration: The writers realize they have no idea what to do with Luka, so they kick him out of the show entirely.

Derision: “How many things do you want to retcon to make this story work?” “Yes.”

Intuition: Gabriel continues to prove how pathetic of a villain he is, even when he has unlimited chances.

Protection: Even after being tricked three times by her, Kagami still thinks Lila is a trustworthy person.

Adoration: “We have Lumity at home”.

Emotion: The episode where Felix essentially commits genocide is somehow also the one where the writers want the audience to start viewing him in a sympathetic light.

Pretension: Felix likes Kagami because the plot says so, and vice versa.

Revelation: Lila only gets as far as she does thanks to Marinette becoming as dumb as the rest of the class.

Confrontation: Our heroes expose the villain's evil plans by spying on them through a bathroom peephole.

Collusion: Remember kids, violent revolutions against politicians are never the answer.

Revolution: Remember kids, violent revolutions against politicians are always the answer.

Representation: To the surprise of literally no one, Felix is revealed to be a Sentimonster, yet the writers still won't tell us that Adrien and Kagami are the same.

Now that you're all caught up, let's get into the twenty-fifth and twenty-sixth episode of Miraculous Ladybug's fifth season: Conformation and Re-Creation

After a brief news report showing everyone enjoying the first day of Summer vacation, Gabriel and Tomoe finally decide to launch “Perfect Alliance”. What does this plan entail? For starters, Gabriel transforms into Monarch, detransforms to akumatize himself into Nightormentor again, gives himself the powers of the Mouse, Rooster and Horse Miraculous in order to clone himself and fly around the globe to spread his nightmare dust. Because just akumatizing Sandboy again and giving him the Mouse Miraculous' Multitude was just too complex of a plan.

Marinette is the first to be affected by the dust, we get a dream where she dresses up as a knight to save Adrien from a cheap recolor of Fang in his dragon form.

This is a weird episode of Super Why.

Marinette defeats the dragon, who reverts back to Gabriel, who is accidentally killed by the fight, causing Adrien to cry since Adrien was watching the whole thing. Marinette wakes up, thankful that it was all just a bad dream sequence. She decides she needs to find out just where Gabriel sent Adrien to make sure he's safe, something that won't make sense as I'll explain later on. As she tries to leave, she keeps experiencing sudden headaches, as do her parents and Alya.

Meanwhile, Adrien is still left reeling from the effects of the nightmare dust from last episode, to the point where he has a panic attack, demanding to be let out. Gabriel, seemingly aware of this, decides to give Adrien the “antidote”, an Alliance ring with an app called “Perfect Alliance”. So once again, despite claiming to do this for his son, Gabriel willingly chose to make his life worse as part of his evil plans. Remember this, it'll be important later on.

Plagg suggests Adrien transform into Cat Noir, but Adrien reminds him that there are cameras everywhere, so he can't risk it. Plagg disables the cameras, but Adrien still says no. Whether he was aware that the robot who was sent to give him the Alliance ring with the new app had a hidden camera is irrevelant, because Adrien gives a different reason why he can't transform.

Adrien: I'm not in my right mind. I'm too angry; at myself for falling short of Marinette's love, at my father for sending me here in London, at this stupid app and these rings that use my image... it makes me sick! This nightmare is giving me the horrible feeling that, if I transform, I'll get akumatized and destroy everything with my Cataclysm. Marinette, Ladybug...

Plagg: Surely Ladybug can help you.

Adrien: If I ask her for help, I'd have to give her information that would jeopardize my secret identity... and I can't.

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Okay, let me make one thing clear. The reason that Adrien can't risk exposing his identity thanks to all the cameras is a good one, and the fact that he doesn't want to risk exposing his identity to Ladybug in particular is a good sign of character development, but the problem I have is the fact that the writers decided to bench Adrien in the first place.

Yes, you heard that right. In arguably the most boneheaded decision in the show's history since... well, a lot of things this season, Adrien, despite being the son of the main villain, isn't going to get involved in the final battle at all.

There are multiple reasons why Adrien staying put in this room is a terrible idea, and most of them involve the fact that almost none of the in-universe explanations for this hold up.

Adrien is being heavily monitored by cameras? We just saw Plagg was able to disable them with ease.

Adrien can't ask Ladybug for help without jeopardizing his secret identity? The fact that he's at risk of being akumatized as is, with or without the Cat Miraculous, will still blow his cover due to Monarch's mind reading abilities (which we saw when Monarch almost learned Luka's secret in “Migration”), so he really has nothing to lose here.

Adrien isn't in the right state of mind thanks to the nightmare dust? Literally every other character who takes part in the final battle is able to either find a way to fight off the nightmares or keeps going while still under the influence of the nightmare dust.

Adrien's ultimate plan to take off his Miraculous and let Plagg choose a new temporary holder? We saw this exact same scenario play out earlier this season in “The Kwamis' Choice”, and things went horribly, horribly wrong.

Do you see why this makes no sense? Even though the show loves to boast about how valuable of an asset Cat Noir is, the writers are bending over backwards to justify keeping Adrien as far away from the final battle as possible, because they know damn well that they'd have to address how terrible his father really is with the reveal.

And the best part? This is basically the last we'll see of Adrien in this episode. Do you want to know how many lines he gets in the next episode, AKA, the final episode of the season? Three. AND THEY'RE ALL AFTER THE FINAL BATTLE.

But we're not done talking about this stupid idea yet, because unlike the other episodes, I have something else to rant about: The writers' commentary. In November of 2023, around four months after the finale premiered, the writers of this show recorded their own audio commentary, and while I don't have the exact translation (if anyone reading this has a translation of this, I would really appreciate the effort), I have seen one post summarizing the things they said, and all I can say is DEAR. LORD. This is not just shooting yourself in the foot. This is shooting yourself in the foot multiple times with Judas Bullets.

Like, it's amazing. We've always speculated just what goes through the writers' heads that makes them come up with some of the strangest ideas to take the story, and now, we have a first-hand account of why these episodes turned out the way they did. For this one moment, they gave about three explanations as to why Adrien was benched for the finale.

Let's start with the first one, Cat Blanc. I know what you're thinking, wasn't Cat Blanc an Akuma from an alternate timeline that our Adrien shouldn't know about? Not according to Melenie Duval. While Adrien's fear of being akumatized is reasonable, Duval claims that he could become Cat Blanc... which makes no sense as A) Adrien's nightmare was of an entirely different Akuma, and B) The aforementioned nightmare dust never informed Adrien of the alternate timeline where Cat Blanc destroyed the world, it just provided him with a nightmare about a similar scenario.

And in case you weren't questioning this woman's judgment, Duval has done on the record to state that her favorite episode of the entire show is “Derision”.

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Our next reasoning is especially stupid, as the rest of the writing team reveal that they had planned to keep Adrien out of the final battle as far back as 2014, nine years before the finished product premiered. Why would they do that? Because they wanted Ladybug to unify with the Cat Miraculous, of course! Sure, you could have just saved this unification for a special or something like that so you don't bench one of your main characters, or you could have at least had Adrien willingly give his Miraculous to Ladybug to unify with in person, but nope. This is seriously one of their defenses— I mean, explanations, for why Adrien isn't allowed to be in the final battle, because they thought it would be more important to give Marinette her 10th new form in three seasons than letting Adrien get some form of closure with his father.

And here's the final reason they gave in the commentary. Remember that dream sequence of Marinette dressed as a knight that was also sort of foreshadowed in “Gabriel Agreste”? Turns out, the writers wanted to, and stop me if you've heard this before, play with the tropes and symbolism of fairy tales. Wow, I've never seen any kind of pop culture do that before... except for Into the Woods, The Princess Bride, Hook, Shrek, Princess Tutu, Ella Enchanted, Hoodwinked!, Enchanted, Tangled, Once Upon a Time, Frozen, RWBY, Ever After High, Red Shoes and the Seven Dwarves, Guillermo del Toro's Pinocchio, and Nimona. But other than those, that's so original!

Even though the writers are acting like they're breaking new ground, do you want to know what they mean by this? They're just doing another damsel in distress situation but this time, Adrien, the boy, is the one who needs to be saved by Marinette, who is, GASP, a girl?! WOW! That totally changes everything!

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Okay, yes, the damsel in distress trope has usually been seen as a misogynistic one due to the fact that the people who needed to be saved are usually women, but like I mentioned way back in my “Gabriel Agreste” review, just swapping the genders isn't enough to breathe new life into a trope as old as this one. It's arguably worse because Adrien isn't just someone who needs to be saved. He's a superhero, and like I mentioned, there were plenty of options to get him out of his room in London.

And I'm guessing that some of you are thinking, “But IOTA! You just want Adrien to save the day by himself because he's a guy!” Just remember that I had this exact same problem last season where the roles were reversed. Remember how I hated the way Marinette's arc about dealing with the stress of being Guardian was hijacked by Adrien complaining about Ladybug not trusting him? This time, we have an arc about Adrien trying to break free from his father's influence that's been hijacked by Marinette needing to save Adrien by herself, robbing him of any agency he had to the plot entirely. This issue isn't about gender. It's never been about gender. I would have the exact same problem if Adrien was the one who confronted Monarch by himself while Marinette was trapped in her room.

This leads to the biggest problem I have with this plot development: It ultimately goes against the core theme of teamwork the show keeps trying to convey. Remember how last season, Marinette needed to learn to let other people trust her? Now, she's going to beat up Monarch all by herself without any help. Remember how last season, Adrien needed to prove he didn't deserve to be left in the dark about everything? Now, he's going to stay all the way in London while his partner gets in the fight of her life. It's detrimental to both of them as characters, and makes everything that happened to them in Season 4 completely pointless.

Okay, now that I've spent five pages ranting about this insane decision, let's get back on track, shall we? As the Perfect Alliance app helps Adrien and Kagami calm down, Marinette sneaks into the Agreste mansion as Ladybug. Meanwhile, Nathalie has her own nightmare about Gabriel winning, AKA, the very thing she could have stopped a long time ago by ratting her evil boss out to Ladybug and Cat Noir.

We then learn just what the Perfect Alliance app really does. Basically, thanks to the technobabble, it helps alleviate the stress from their nightmares. Or, to put it in Layman's terms, Gabriel and Tomoe plan to get the entire population of Earth addicted to cyber crack. We see this affect several of Marinette's classmates, but because Mylene has a sudden disdain for technology that “Was made without respect for the Earth's resources”, she's the only one who sees the problem here. I'd ask why this wasn't established earlier this season, but it doesn't matter, since Mylene gives in anyway,

Because it's a day that ends with a “Y”, Gabriel goes to talk to Emilie's body yet again, and it seems like even the writers realized how tired this got, as Nathalie finally decided to ambush him with a crossbow.

Miss Sancoeur, I served with Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I knew Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Buffy the Vamprie Slayer was a friend of mine. Miss Sancoeur, you're no Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Yes, it only took five seasons worth of evil plans for Nathalie to realize just how demented her boss really is.

Nathalie: I can't let you do that... if you make the wish to bring her back, someone will have to go in her place. Emilie would never have agreed to this!

Gabriel: Do you think I'd be monstrous enough to sacrifice a human being?

Uh... yes? That is literally what equivalent exchange means. You really don't know how the wish works after researching it?

Shockingly, the frail woman armed with nothing but a crossbow isn't able to stop someone with superpowers. There isn't even a fight. Monarch just knocks the crossbow out of her hands and she faints. Maybe you should have actually come up with some sort of plan before confronting Gabriel by yourself, dumbass.

Back to Ladybug, she searches through Gabriel's stuff and finally learns he's Monarch... even though she should already know thanks to Felix and Kagami's play last episode. She even looks pretty shocked to see Monarch detransform.

Back to the commentary, the writers justify this with their absurd “Every episode can be watched on its own” rule. Because simply having Marinette say she already knows was out of the equation, I guess. Seriously, earlier in the episode, Tikki (who, along with Plagg, wasn't affected by the nightmare dust for some reason) had doubts that Marinette should break into the Agreste mansion, and it came across like neither of them knew the truth, and this was a reckless decision that wasn't motivated by Gabriel being Monarch at all. Once again, the writers fail to understand the idea of using “Previously On...” segments to help new viewers catch up on what's happening. It's even more confusing when you remember that Tikki knows Adrien is Cat Noir, so his father being Monarch coupled with his sudden absence should be setting off all kinds of red flags in her book.

Ladybug tries to text Cat Noir about who Monarch really is, but chooses not to send it after Gabriel pushes a few of her buttons. Rather than jumping Gabriel while she still has the element of surprise, she only chooses to grill Nathalie for questions once Gabriel is out of the room. And of course, only when she's on death's door does Nathalie tell Ladybug to stop Monarch, but not before telling her to transform back.

We see Gabriel and Tomoe put their plan into action. They create a fake scene of Ladybug and Cat Noir kidnapping Adrien and Kagami in order to rile up the public (who aren't in the best state of mind thanks to the nightmares) in order to for them to use the Alliance rings to transform them into the “Miraculized”. In other words, it's basically “Heroes' Day” all over again. Seriously, think about it. Just like “Heroes' Day”, it looks like Adrien is being harmed by Ladybug in an attempt to push the population to the brink of despair so Gabriel can create an army in the process. Yeah, the public doesn't know the two are the same, but the audience does. Granted, this is a minor nitpick compared to the rest of my problems with this episode, but I hope you can see what I'm getting at here.

Case in point, the reason Nathalie told Ladybug to detransform was because Gabriel has found a way to track her and Cat Noir through their “quantum signatures”. With Cat Noir, it was thanks to the dust from Gabriel's Cataclysm wound, and with Ladybug, it was thanks to the Magical Charm she gave Gabriel earlier in “Gabriel Agreste”... which he shouldn't have since it was destroyed in “Dearest Family”.

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Seriously, this is the season finale. How the hell are the writers still struggling to remember important events like this?

Now's as good a time as any to talk about the Miraculized's design. Yeah, they're pretty lame. They all look like they're wearing fencing gear, and don't look intimidating in the slightest. They also now have the ability to use every Miraculous power at once, which breaks the previously established rules about the Alliance rings in that only one ring can handle each Miraculous power. You could at least argue that the robots used in “Confrontation” had more advanced technology that made them capable of using multiple powers, but nothing has changed about the Alliance rings to justify this. And remember, this is something every Miraculized in the world can use, yet the system hasn't been completely fried, and as we'll later see Monarch can still freely use the other Kwamis' power even when they're being shared with the Miraculized across the world. In fact, how can the Miraculized even transform like this? Monarch doesn't akumatize anyone to spread this transformation. Gabriel just tells to say “Alliance, Miraculize Me!”, and now they can transform. Was this always a function of the Alliance rings? Is there a tiny Akuma hidden in each ring? How the hell does any this work?

Ladybug fights off some of the Miraculized who used Voyage to find her, and remembers Nathalie's advice to detransform. So just like in “Passion”, even though she's still wearing her Miraculous, the system specifically designed to track her down isn't able to find her unless she's still transformed. Marinette runs away to a safe place before running into Plagg, who tells her Cat Noir is out of commission. With no other options, Marinette decides to unify with the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous, turning into Bug Noire, revealing her identity to Monarch in the process, and ending the episode.

Bug Noire's design is admittedly pretty nice. I like the balance of red, black, and green, though the hair is a little too long for my taste. Granted, I still don't get why this is the reason why Adrien can't be here to fight Monarch alongside his partner. I'm just saying, was it really worth it, writers?

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... NATHALIE

Yep, right before the finish line, Nathalie gets her second award this season. After spending several episodes doing nothing but letting herself rot away, Nathalie only chose to finally do something about Gabriel once he was literally about to enact his final plan, thought she could stop him with nothing but a crossbow, and only begged Ladybug for help when it looked like she was about to die and had nothing left to lose.

“Re-Creation”, the final episode of the season, starts off with Lila watching some broadcasts of people succumbing to their paranoia (and she does it while smirking because the writers still don't think we understand she's evil) and transforming into Miraculized while she puts on a new disguise that makes her look like an evil Edna Mode.

How come Lila isn't even affected by the nightmare dust like the rest of the human population? As always, never explained!

Back in the Agreste mansion, Bug Noire and Monarch are duking it out, and we get some pretty creative uses of Lucky Charm, like when she summons a piano to crash down on Monarch. Meanwhile, after Marinette's friends manage to get the Alliance ring off a Miraculized Ivan, we get to see how the rest of the world is dealing with the Miraculized. In Shanghai, the Renlings help Fei through her nightmares, Su-Han has recruited Jagged Stone, Luka, Penny and Fang to the Order of the Guardians instead of actually getting backup like he said he would in “Multiplication”, Present Bunnix finally decides to do something and uses Burrow to sent the Guardians to Paris, while the United Heroez fight off the Miraculized and learn the true nature of the Alliance rings. Just remember, it was too much for the writers to let Adrien get involved in the final battle, yet all these side characters get to do something in the finale for some reason.

Meanwhile, as if things couldn't get any worse, Nino decides the Resistance needs to get involved after reassuring Mr. Damocles that they never give up. Believe me, not much would change if you guys just threw in the towel, especially now that the United Heroez are here, and have Eagle, a member whose powers work as an instant cure for everyone's nightmares. Hey, while we're on the subject, does anyone know where the United Heroez were this entire season? I can excuse Fei as she's just one teenager in Shanghai, but the Americans have a small army of heroes, including the president, yet they just let two violent coups in France happen last week.

As Bug Noire and Monarch keep fighting, Bug Noire comes up with the brilliant idea to Cataclysm the Butterfly Miraculous, only being foiled by Monarch already having Resistance active. Okay, is a side effect of using the Cat Miraculous this season a taste for blood? Why the hell are the heroes so okay with trying to use Cataclysm on their enemies now? Bug Noire then decides to use her Cataclysm for something far more reasonable, breaking the ground beneath her and Monarch. Because I guess Bug Noire is really gunning for Biggest Idiot this episode.

Back with the Resistance, they meet up with the Guardians, United Heroez, and Ladydragon, who have actually been getting shit done. Wow, it's just like that scene from that one movie where all the characters we've come to know over the years rally together for the final battle! What was it called again? Oh yeah, Spy Kids 3-D: Game Over.

While the other heroes are overwhelmed by the Miraculized, we cut back to Bug Noire and Monarch yet again, now inside the area where Emilie's body is. The two keep fighting as Monarch tells Bug Noire why he's doing all this, all while Lila breaks into the mansion.

Monarch: I want my wife, Adrien's mother, to come back to us! Once our family is reunited, Kagami and Adrien will become the eternal icons of this world! And we will be here to witness their absolute triumph!

Bug Noire: “Your wife”? “Come back”? “Kagami and Adrien, eternal icons”? How many lives are you going to ruin in the name of your crazy dreams?!

Monarch: As many as it takes! In order to bring Emilie back, someone else will have to disappear! In order to heal the wound that Cat Noir inflicted on me, someone else will have to be wounded!

Bug Noire: Someone else? But who?

Monarch: Anyone! No one matters except us! How about you, Marinette? Wouldn't you give your life for your sweet Adrien's happiness?

Bug Noire: Do you really think that's what he'd want? To discover that his father has turned into a supervillain, willing to make innocent people pay the price of his madness?

Monarch: Adrien would do the same thing!

Bug Noire: Never! Unlike you, Adrien has made his peace with it. He's not living in the past! He has a whole life ahead of him!

Bug Noire: You'd know this if you ever took an interest in him. But in reality, Adrien means NOTHING to you anymore! You've locked him in your house! Locked him in your Alliance rings!

Bug Noire: Locked him into a life that allows you to hide behind him in order to justify YOUR madness!

Monarch: All I want is for him to be happy!

Remember all of this, because it's going to be important soon.

Bug Noire uses her Lucky Charm, and gets a tube of glue. She uses some of it on this random boomerang she found (I'm assuming it's the remains of Nathalie's crossbow), sticks it to her yo-yo, and then throws it at Emilie's coffin. Monarch reflexively grabs the sticky boomerang, and loses all of the rings on his right hand just as Bug Noire uses Cataclysm on the elevator to get to this area of the mansion, with the intent on CRUSHING EMILIE WITH IT. Our hero, ladies and gentlemen! Monarch saves his wife, but because he's distracted, he can't stop Bug Noire from throwing her staff at the Butterfly Miraculous, knocking it off and reverting Monarch back to Gabriel. Bug Noire ties up Gabriel's feet, and when Gabriel tries to sucker punch her with Venom, Bug Noire grabs the hand, threatening to Cataclysm the remaining Alliance rings and the two rings she should damn well know contain Adrien's Amok. Either she's bluffing, or we accidentally got the Paris Special universe's version of these events.

Bug Noire tries to reason with Gabriel, who then breaks down crying, showing how deep down, he just really cares about his family. And even though just six episodes ago, Marinette said that it was very easy for idealistic people to be taken advantage of by others, she buys into Gabriel's last-minute sob story, and wouldn't you know it, he stabs her in the back. Congratulations, Marinette. You just doomed the universe. Even when the Dino Charge Rangers accidentally got everyone on their planet killed, they were at least able to fix it themselves.

It's time to go back to the commentary, where we can learn the writers' true intent for this scene. They honestly believe that both Marinette and Gabriel care for Adrien in their own ways, and the whole reason that Marinette chose to trust Gabriel was to teach the lesson that it's important to talk out your feelings with others... a lesson that fails because 1) Marinette had already beaten Gabriel through violence, 2) Marinette trusting Gabriel backfired horribly, and 3) Gabriel won because he took advantage of Marinette's trust! You can't teach a lesson about trust when for all intents and purposes, Marinette once again lost BECAUSE SHE CHOSE TO TRUST SOMEONE!

Even though he had to unify with Tikki and Plagg to try making the wish in “Deflagration” (I really shouldn't have used the “Great Continuity!” clip earlier), we get yet another retcon this season: Tikki and Plagg have to reveal their true forms. Yeah, I know Tikki's true form was briefly seen in “Dearest Family”, but that doesn't change the fact that Monarch didn't do this when he had the Ladybug and Cat Miraculous in “Deflagration”.

Tikki and Plagg's true forms just look okay. I like the otherworldly theme, but they don't really stand out much. They honestly look more like forms Ladybug and Cat Noir would have than anything else.

It's here that we get the culmination of five seasons' worth of lore. After a brief glimpse of it in “Ephemeral”, Tikki and Plagg, the Kwamis of Creation and Destruction will merge their energies to form their true true form, the Kwami of Reality itself, able to grand any wish asked. This majestic, otherworldly being's name? Gimmi. Just... Gimmi. The commentary claims they're named after an ABBA song, and I wish I was making this up.

Like with Tikki and Plagg's true forms, Gimmi has an okay design. They're just a little too pink for something meant to be a fusion of the red Tikki and the black Plagg.

As Marinette begs Gabriel not to go through with this, Gabriel doesn't think twice about it, and instead, gives Marinette the rings containing Adrien's Amok, along with a request, fully aware that his time is almost up.

Gabriel: Marinette, make sure that Adrien never knows about the villain that I was, but instead, that he remembers the times I tried to be a good father.

Alright, we've finally gotten to the most controversial part of the episode: Gabriel's “redemption”, and I put that term extremely loosely.

Put aside the fact that almost a third of this season was spent telling the audience that a certain character who shall not be named is beyond saving despite working alongside him multiple times for the past two seasons, Gabriel's last-minute redemption falls flat because he doesn't even seem to feel remorse for what he's done. Not once does he actually say he's sorry for what he's done, just how Emilie's death affected him. That's understandable, but he doesn't even seem to acknowledge the weight of his actions or how many lives have been endangered. Remember earlier, when Monarch said he was perfectly okay with sacrificing someone else if it means his family can be happy? Yeah, that never comes back, especially now that him making the wish is portrayed as a good thing when every time it's been discussed ever since it was first explained in “Robostus” just how dangerous actually using it is.

In fact, let's discuss the fact that Gabriel is getting to make the wish in the first place. The whole idea of this basically contradicts Gabriel supposedly realizing he's gone too far. Rather than just having Gabriel give up his quest and let Emilie rest in peace, we're supposed to be happy that Gabriel double-crossed Marinette even when the music is making it seem like it's a bad thing... WHICH IT IS! Once again, for a show that loves to go on and on about how powerful love is, it really loves to show people getting screwed over whenever they decide to show compassion to their enemies. Imagine if in Return of the Jedi, when Luke chose to not give into the Dark Side by sparing Vader, Vader took the chance to kick him in the crotch while he was distracted. That's basically what happened here.

Next, notice how Gabriel specifically asks Marinette to make sure Adrien never learns the truth about who he was, and “Remembers the times he tried to be a good father”. After everything he's done, Gabriel isn't even willing to let Adrien learn about what he's done, because he wants him to focus exclusively on the times he TRIED to be a good father. This isn't the matter of Gabriel missing Adrien's fencing tournament because he had an important business meeting. Gabriel was a literal supervillain who preyed on innocent people in order to obtain absolute power, and he wasn't even a good father to his only kid. He was neglectful, controlling, and in the last few months of his life, spent more time trying to ruin his relationship with his girlfriend for no reason other than because he thought his associate's kid was a better match for him. He was a terrible father, and Gabriel even seems to be aware of this, but rather than find a way to repent for everything he's done, Gabriel is basically going to take the coward's way out by forcing Marinette to sugarcoat his life instead of admitting he was, at the very least, a flawed parent, all so Adrien will feel bad when he finally drops dead.

And yeah, let's talk about how Gabriel assumes that Adrien shouldn't be allowed to know the truth... WHEN THAT'S NOT HIS DECISION TO MAKE. Adrien should be the one to judge whether he believes Gabriel was a good father or not. Of course Gabriel would assume he was a good father despite the numerous red flags, but Adrien is another story. By keeping the truth hidden from Adrien, you're depriving him of a potentially important moment in his life where he finally learns to break free from his father's influence. Instead, even though he's a fucking superhero, we're just supposed to accept the fact that Adrien is just a poor, fragile, sensitive baby boy who can't handle hearing any bad news or else I guess he'll explode. It says a lot when, of all movies, Star Trek V: The Final Frontier did a better job handling an idea like this, by saying that pain is a natural part of life.

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But let's talk about the biggest problem with this turn of events: The fact that it essentially vindicates everything Gabriel has done, with or without the mask, as well as essentially convey a pro-child abuse message. In case you weren't around before I posted this review, I asked my followers who have been victims of child abuse or poor parenting to share their experiences so I could get an idea of how similar they were to what Adrien has had to go through. And a lot of them were pretty similar.

During almost all of what I read from these people, their parents or guardians shared one thing in common: An inability to admit being wrong. All of them tended to either blame their kids for whatever happened to them, or find ways to justify their poor treatment. As far as they're concerned, it's the kid's fault that they're being treated so poorly. And while I'm sure a handful of people isn't enough to survey the entire population of abuse victims on this planet, the fact that some of these people, as in actual victims of child abuse, were able to see similarities with their own upbringings and the way the main villain treats his son and don't buy the show deciding to act like all of that was perfectly okay says a lot about how much this finale dropped the ball when it came to the lesson it wanted to teach.

Yes, from what I've read from my followers and other things online, some abusive parents do believe that what they're doing to their children is out of a warped view of love, but that isn't enough to validate their actions completely, and it obviously doesn't validate Gabriel's actions during the last five seasons. During the entire run of the show, Gabriel has denied his son a normal life, treats him like an object, and despite claiming that he really loves him deep down, he almost never shows it. It seemed like the show was either going to have Gabriel realize the error of his ways due to how fruitless they ended up being, but having him get the upper hand on Marinette at the very last second ultimately makes it so all of his effort, every evil plan, every civilian endangered, was all worth it. And that's why Gabriel's final moments supposedly acting like he's repented for his actions don't work, and why it turned what was initially just a boring finale into one that was beyond infuriating.

And I'm assuming that you're thinking to yourself, what exactly is the wish Gabriel was so desperate to make that he tricked Marinette at the last second?

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We never really learn what kind of wish Gabriel makes using Gimmi, even in the epilogue. I'm also going to talk about this in a later post, but of course Astruc, being Astruc had to give his usual sarcastic remarks to anyone who had the slightest question about what the hell just happened.

I love how someone will ask something like “Do you mind clearing up a few questions I have about the season finale?”, and Astruc will hear what they said as if they just asked, “Is Mylene secretly the reincarnation of the Anti-Christ?”.

So Gabriel makes his wish, somehow reunites with Emilie's soul as he ascends to Heaven... until the angels realize they made a horrible mistake, and send Gabriel to his custom-made Tenth Circle of Hell. Reality itself is rewritten and all of the characters we've come to know over the past five seasons are effectively dead. If that isn't supposed to be a happy ending, I don't know what is.

According to the transcript, it's been a month after the wish is made, we see how Paris has changed since then. Not only has Miss Bustier given birth to her baby, she's also been elected as Mayor of Paris, already passing her first law, the “Eco Rule”.

Miss Bustier: It consists of very simple principles: don't take more from the Earth than what it can give us, distribute its riches equitably and don't pollute more than it can recycle.

Remember when Mylene said that you can't solve climate change with a single law? I guess the writers forgot to recycle that moral too, because despite the vague as hell guidelines, Paris has already adapted to function without plastic wrappers or cars. Just remember, it's only been one month since the wish was made. Even Star Trek needed at least 130 years and a nuclear war before its utopian society could be established. And that's not even getting into the new school she's helped create.

Miss Bustier: In this new school, there will be no classes or struggling to get good grades. Children of all ages will be able to intermix and freely access all kinds of activities.

The fuck you mean “no grades”?! How the hell will that even work?! We're supposed to see this as her being an impressive politician, but it comes across like some grade schooler's “If I were president” essay. And remember, ONE. MONTH.

How else has the Eco Rule been implemented? All of the Alliance rings have been melted down and reforged into a statue honoring... the great hero, Gabriel Agreste.

Yep. This is the ultimate fate of the main villain after five seasons of terrorizing the city of Paris: He gets a fucking statue in his honor. Are we sure this is a victory for the good guys? And no, just surviving the villain's master plan doesn't count as a win.

Even better, according to Adrien, he somehow helped defeat Monarch... even though Gabriel is Monarch, so is Monarch a different person in this world? What about Monarch's previous identities, Hawkmoth and Shadowmoth? Did they still exist in this world? They had to, considering that Chloe and Andre are still nowhere to be seen since the revolution, implying that either she's different in this world, or she also betrayed Ladybug for the same reasons. Nathalie is also back in full health, so did she ever use the Peacock? Was the Peacock ever damaged? We see Felix has it in this new world, but Emilie is still dead, so did she die of different causes in this timeline? Speaking of time, what happened to Bunnix? Did she survive too? Is she aware of the changes to the world like she was in “Cat Blanc”?

To summarize, WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!?

Adrien is hesitant to wear the ring because he's not sure if he can ever be even half the man his amazing father was. Marinette tells Adrien to be himself while handing the ring to him. So... was this an order? If so, was it intentional? Does Marinette even know what she's doing, or because she's a product of Gabriel's wish, she has to do this without a hitch? In fact, when he made the wish, why didn't Gabriel make Adrien, Felix, and Kagami humans instead of forcing them to rely on rings containing their souls that can easily break?

This scene is a great way to summarize Adrienette this season: The writers trying to write a heartwarming scene while hoping the audience doesn't think too hard about all the uncomfortable things it implies.

After reforging the Miraculous she got back from Monarch, Marinette decides to hand them off. Because fuck it, let's break the temp hero rule while we're at it! Chloe who? Ladybug, Cat Noir, Rena Rouge, Carapace, Viperion, Pegasus, Ryuko, Vesperia, Polymouse, Pigella, Purple Tigress, Miss Hound, Rooster Bold, Caprikid, Minotaurox, Bunnix, and even Argos (despite being the reason the heroes lost their Miraculous in the first place) assemble, ready for whatever challenge the world throws at them. Also, there's no reveal between Ladybug and Cat Noir this season because the writers still want to drag this plotline out, even when there's no excuse as to why they can't now that Monarch is gone.

We then learn who got the Butterfly Miraculous: Lila, who plans to get revenge on Marinette. Yep, the girl who has never even touched a Miraculous in five seasons is going to be Hawkmoth's successor. Not Tomoe (who I should mention never answered for being Gabriel's accomplice), not Audrey, not even Chloe. It's Lila. How the hell did she even get it anyway? Did Gabriel intentionally recreate the world to have Lila get the Butterfly Miraculous, or did Lila somehow retain her memories through close proximity to the wish and--

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Fuck it, season's over anyway. Thank God...

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS...MARINETTE

While I can't say for certain what she did with Adrien is her fault thanks to Gabriel making the wish, I can say a good chunk of the things Marinette did leading up to Gabriel winning are on her. She recklessly used her Cataclysm multiple times in her fight with Monarch, tried to crush Emilie's comatose body with debris, once again chose to gloat about how she was going to take Gabriel's Miraculous instead of just doing it the first chance she got, seemingly forgot Adrien was a Sentimonster, and somehow managed to lose even when she had Gabriel at her mercy.

So, yeah... this finale was terrible, if it wasn't obvious from this review.

It was just a complete trainwreck from start to finish. A good chunk of the first part was spent either ignoring the events of the last episode, or coming up with excuses as to why Adrien shouldn't get involved. And that's not even getting into Nathalie's “redemption”, which only really happened once she had nothing to lose, seeing how she was even closer to dying than Gabriel was. In fact, now that I think about it, why was more emphasis given to Nathalie's declining health over Gabriel? You know, the guy who's enacting his final plan because he's supposedly hours from death, yet effortlessly manages to clone himself, fly around the world as an Akuma, and keep up with Bug Noire when he struggled to enact a plan that required him to leave the lair without traveling around the world during “Intuition”? Given how we now know that the writers wanted the final battle to involve Bug Noire, I'm starting to think they also prioritized her opponent being in top shape while ignoring the Cataclysm wound affecting him.

The second half was mostly boring thanks to just how low the stakes felt. We know where Adrien is, and since Bug Noire was fighting Monarch, there was no danger of them taking her Miraculous, so for the most part, the Miraculized fighting the other heroes just felt like padding. Nobody even seemed to look for Ladybug or Cat Noir, not even the heroes. Of course, then we got to Gabriel's wish. I've gone over this before, but it bears repeating. Gabriel's “redemption” just doesn't work due to how little effort is spent actually making the audience feel bad for him other than saying “His wife is dead, and he's sad, so that justifies everything”. It doesn't help that we kind of had four episodes explaining why some people can't change, and it wasn't used when talking about Gabriel, but rather, Chloe and Lila. Because these writers really have their priorities straight.

The ending of the season itself practically falls apart with how many plotholes and unfortunate implications it has. And before you say that stuff like Adrien once again being left in the dark can be resolved next season, here's the thing: This was planned to be the series finale with how everything feels wrapped up. There's a sense of finality that shows all the main characters getting their happy ending, and we're just supposed to not question the new utopia Paris is now, much less the fact that even after eight years, Ladybug and Cat Noir still don't know who the other is. Even putting that aside, the show has always done a poor job of following up on plotpoints established in earlier seasons, as the lunchroom scene from “Illusion” shows.

Here's a summary of all the lessons the finale teaches: We shouldn't hold terrorists accountable for their actions if they just say they love their family, abuse victims should be constantly coddled and shouldn't be allowed to know the truth about their viewers, it's okay to keep crucial information from your significant other, genocide is okay as long as the person who commits it says it's for a good cause, love for others can easily be taken advantage of, so never trust anyone, genocide is the only way to create an eco-friendly world, environmental protection laws can be passed within a month and nobody (not even car manufacturers) will complain, teenage girls are worse than abusive parents who double as supervillains, and even if it was planned for almost a decade, don't let your main heroine be the one to save the day, but rather, the villain.

If anyone reading this is planning on becoming a writer and is worried that people won't like their work, just remember that there are people who get paid to work on this show.

But yeah, this is how the season ends, not with a bang, but with a nosedive. I was mostly pissed off with how Seasons 3 and 4 ended, but here? I'm just disappointed. This was the finale that we waited eight years for. The epic final battle against Monarch, and rather than the ultimate fight to the finish, the writers came with several excuses to not involve one of the two main characters in the final battle, the other main character fails to actually save the day, and the villain is rewarded for all of actions because he chose to turn himself into a messiah. I tuned into this season to at least see how the story would end out of curiosity, but it didn't even deliver an ending that made all the pointless filler, poor writing, and bad characterization worth it. I started this finale off bored, and I ended up furious for how lackluster this ending felt. It says a lot when this finale has been compared to Star vs. the Forces of Evil in terms of just screwing everything up.

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE SEASON IS... MARINETTE

Marinette may not have been able to beat Gabriel in terms of stopping his plan, but she did manage to outdo him in terms of stupidity. Because she got the award four times this season (Evolution, Revelation, Confrontation, Re-Creation), she takes home the title of Biggest Idiot.

And for those who are curious or didn't keep up with my reviews, Gabriel gets second place with three Biggest Idiot Awards (Intuition, Protection, Revolution), we have a five-way tie for third place with Luka (Determination, Migration), Mayor Andre (Adoration, Action), Chloe (Deflagration, Collusion), Felix (Emotion, Representation), and Nathalie (Passion, Conformation), who all got the award twice, and a ten-way tie for fourth place with Alya (Multiplication), Xuppu (Destruction), Mr. Damocles (Jubiliation), Nino (Illusion), Joan of Arc (Reunion), Ice Cream Man Andre (Elation), Kagami (Perfection), Kim (Derision), and Tomoe (Pretension) each getting the award once.

And with that, we're done with Season 5. It's been a long road, but all I can say is...

youtube

At least, until the analysis and ranking posts.

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somehow-a-human · 28 days

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Whose POV is it Anyway?

The Dirty Donkey, I think I found *Clue!*

DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY

Continuing with my analysis of the changing POV's in Good Omens 2, let's take a look at the pub scene in the Dirty Donkey and the rest of episode 2!

For reference & context, I recommend reading these posts:

Whose POV is it Anyway? - Introduction

Lens Filters

POV "Your 'Something's Wrong' Voice"

POV a Trip to Hell and a 25 Lazarii Miracle

POV a Companion to Owls

When we first see Crowley in his tactical turtleneck, it's when Shax shows up at the Bentley. He is asleep in the car and his sideburns are long. Is this because he's being observed by Shax first in this scene so it's her POV? It's difficult to distinguish if the filter could be the BDFX Crowley filter or the BPM Hell filter, but if we're using the sideburn lengths as an indicator we can look at this initial scene as an external POV.

*Fun thing I noticed here: when Shax threatens Crowley the plants in the backseat start squealing and shaking because they're afraid lol.

Next we get to see Crowley and Aziraphale go to the pub! They never go to the pub! Aziraphale strokes the thin dark dukes chest, and is saved by his snusband from the scary carpet man. The entire scene inside the pub is warm and hazy and glowy AS HELL (well not as hell, that's a different filter) It's clearly filmed with the BGG filter and likely Aziraphale's POV, which makes sense, they talk about making people fall in love, romance, Jane Austen, Cotillion Balls, it's VEERRRYYY Aziraphale. Crowley's sideburns are long throughout and when the pair get up to leave it's because Aziraphale mentions he wants to show Crowley *the Clue*!

Crowley's response to this is: "I'm lost, am I doing a rainstorm?" nothing rude about the Capital C Clue, yet.

Then the scene cuts to a shot of them walking out of the pub and we have transitioned to Crowley's POV! The lighting has changed and is saturated and cool toned, Crowley's sideburns are short, and he IMMEDIATELY roasts Aziraphale,

"Whatever you found, don't call it a Clue... well don't pronounce the capital letter!"

spicy snek.

Even if you make the argument that they could have filmed these scenes on vastly different days, the continuity for the extras dress and placement was spot on the, as you can see from these shots of before and after the cut. Notice the extra in the red jumper near the door is there in both shots with the same group of people, nobody seems to have moved, and Crowley's sideburns are the only thing that very obviously changes length between these scenes.

Crowley and Aziraphale then head back into the bookshop.

We're back to the warm hazy tones of the BGG filter and Crowley's sideburns are long again. We've switched back to Aziraphale's POV. They get a prophecy of sorts from Gabriel, and Aziraphale goes to study his Bible and think for a while.

We next see Crowley Asking Nina about Sudden Rain.

His sideburns are short again, and the BDFX filter is back evidenced by the bright cool saturated tone of the scene, so we're in Crowley's POV. Aziraphale meets him at the Bentley and says he'd like to drive the car. We can hear Crowley even smacks Aziraphale's hand away, which if this was from Aziraphale's POV I'm sure is a detail that would've gone omitted!

NEXT POV Bodysnatchers & Cosplaying a bookseller

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