Tumgik
#and he specifically said he doesnt want people do do the thing he's so hurt that we didnt do
redrum-alice · 17 hours
Text
ABA x Paracelsus HCs that live in my mind rent-free, even though I haven't played the game--
Some of these HCs include other characters involved in their arcade mode.
ABA is no stranger to stalking people. So when she came across a lookout point, she saw many couples, mostly teenagers, making out and going on romantic dates. She wonders what it would feel like to be young and in love, rather than just declaring someone whom she met first glance as a "husband"
ABA's collection of keys were hidden somewhere in the pocket dimension. She sometimes uses them as accessories to adorn herself, despite the like of knowledge in fashion (the girl wears pants as a top--)
There are many shades of blue that ABA can pick from. Since Paracelsus turned himself blue, the shiny surface reflected more colors than just blue, inspiring her to try and appreciate other colors near the blue gradient.
Added to the color stuff, she eventually tries variation of outfits with other colors, but with blue as the base.
Paracelsus knows when she's feeling fatigued. When she's at her limit, he opens the pocket dimension and lets her rest there until she wakes up. ABA sees this as his love language, but unintentional on his part
Both ABA and Paracelsus have no clue on how homonculi biology works, and Paracelsus hates to admit he feels bad that ABA may be at risk of getting herself hurt without him knowing what to do
Paracelsus wishes he knows more about human anatomy because its the closest one to ABA's physiology.
Since ABA is clairvoyant, she often hears the spirits of their victims which she tries to ignore, and probably because she doesnt know the correct response to a wailing dead person wanting justice. When its too much, she asks Paracelsus if what theyre doing was justified and that she begins to regret her rage filled jealousy directed at those that dont even bother them.
Paracelsus keeps telling ABA that she needn't to worry because it was a necessity for the both of them-- something he deeply regrets to say because he knows she has strong principles that she live by despite not being a human
Paracelsus, deep down, is ashamed of himself for tainting ABA for the purpose of tending to his bloodlust. He saw how genuine and pure hearted she is, but it turned into malice because of his demonic origin. He begins to wonder what ABA would be like if she found someone else years ago.
Just like ABA, Paracelsus has an unspoken fear of abandonment, but since he lacks capacity to feel other emotions, he doesnt notice this.
Ever since Elphelt and Testament approached her with good intentions, ABA wanted to make more friends like them, but is scared that others have ill intentions toward her and Paracelsus.
ABA's favorite book would be Alice in Wonderland when she was still in Frasco, specifically the part where Alice was trapped in a room or multiple doors with the smallest door being the exit. ABA admires this because of the concept of escaping, especially that there's a key involved. (Im biased bc my name's Alice and i like this story--)
Besides door keys, she also collects windup key and smaller keys for chests and compartments. She sees this as a symbol for discovering new things, especially music when she came across a music box that needed a key
Speaking of music boxes, she associates this object with Elphelt bc of her musical talent (and that she may as well look like the ballerina spinning on the music box)
Other than doors, music boxes, and compartments, she also came across a small doll that needed a key. After she winds it up, it began walking and talking towards her and freaks her out. But when it said "mama" in a robotic voice, ABA contemplates and wonders if she was ready to become a parent somewhere in the near future when Paracelsus has a body. An impossible thought, but one could never be sure, and it scares her.
Butterfly Pea tea with brown sugar, or sparkling butterfly pea lemonade with honey would probably her favorite drink because of its color. She shares this with her hubby 🥰😋
There comes a time that her bandanges would get uncomfortable and smell bad from blood stains and wounds, so Paracelsus tells her she needs to change them before she gets an infection. He does stop her midway because he realizes she isnt wearing any undergarments and proceeds to take her in the pocket dimension.
Elphelt offers ABA to shop with her to pick clothes suited for her. The first thing she sees at the boutique display was a wedding dress and begins to day dream a wedding with Paracelsus. Without her looking, Elphelt happily buys the wedding dress with matching tuxedo and gives it to ABA, despite Paracelsus' protests (the fact that he hears them chatting about setting up the wedding next day had him ded on the spot :P)
ABA watches home video tapes left in houses unoccupied by their owners (abandoned or they went on vacation; ABA is a home intruder lol). She finds a tape labeled "Happy Day" and it plays a recording of a newly wed couple dancing at their reception. The way the couple moved gracefully tickled an idea in her brain and insisted she and Paracelsus should dance. But since the large key doesnt have any legs, her attempts in waltzing with him went nowhere 😅 (and this gave more reason for ABA to find a body for Paracelsus)
At late nights when ABA is asleep, Paracelsus wonders that if he had a body, would ABA still be shorter or they would be in the same height? Either way, he was impressed that she can keep herself up with that low weight despite her tall stature, more so on how she was able to carry him around without much muscle mass.
When he sleeps beside her, her hair unwittingly falls on his bow and feels how soft it is. A very pleasant feeling he won't admit.
Everyday, Paracelsus keeps reminding ABA that she needed to eat to gather strength. ABA often forgets to eat because its not hard wired in hr system, nor that it was even natural for her to eat in the first place.
58 notes · View notes
hecksupremechips · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Girl like. The reason he said "this is how it should be" and faced death with a smile....is cuz he wanted to die. For 2 years he sat there thinking he was worthless and deserved to die. If he hadn’t be shot, his death would’ve been suicide, he was fully planning to die in a gutter somewhere undetected. When saying "this is how it should be" hes literally saying "don’t cry because I’m dying, my death is a good thing actually because I fucking suck and you are better off without me". I don’t think that’s badass even slightly, it’s actually really sad and really shitty. Shinjiro is so convinced that he deserves to die and hates the idea of anyone giving a shit about him because he literally can’t wrap his mind around the idea that he will be missed when he’s gone, that his death is a bad thing actually. And his last words were meant to be comforting because he fully did not intend for anyone to be there when he died, he intended to die alone, so he says them as a reminder that he’s not worth crying over
Personally, if it were me, if I was holding my dying best friend in my arms who was deeply depressed and suicidal and he said "this is how it should be" uh. I wouldn’t admire him for it??? Like am I losing my mind when I say the way this game handles Shinji is bad or is anyone else seeing this too 😰
#its like okay listen i understand the basic math of any persona game they say things and everything they say is actually#very bad when you think about it for more than 3 seconds#like what theyre intending to do with the death of this character is be like oh no your sad friend dies tragically thats so saddddd#but that doesnt mean you cant live a wonderful life full of meaning you cant let grief consume you life is beautiful awagga#and i guess shinji is a specific character whos used cuz i guess its more tragic that he never realized he was worthy of life and shit#and i guess its also like ‘dont be like this guy who let grief consume him and then died you gotta Be Different’#which i dont. love. that last part cuz if you think about shinji and what led him down this road#its like. of course hes depressed! he accidentally killed a woman with a child when he was 16!#he himself is an orphan and he just made some other kid an orphan as well and it happened cuz his persona went out of control#which very much can translate to ‘this must mean im dangerous and can hurt everyone if im not kept under control’#so of course he isolated himself and believed he was evil and became suicidal like who wouldnt feel that way#like am i supposed to be mad he left sees and took drugs cuz uh while i dont think isolation or Evil Drug is good for his mental health#i dont think him continuing to fight in sees is something he can just easily do again given how he killed someone like he shouldnt have to#be a part of this thing anymore like how would he even safely get castor to not do that??? he cant kill more people on accident!#so yeah like using shinji as an example of bad coping mechanisms is already just. a big fucking oof to me like it just feels like the game#is saying he shouldve gotten over it and simply not be suicidal and stayed on the team. idk if thats the intent but uh it wouldnt faze me#cuz persona games are notoriously awful at writing characters who are traumatized and abused#but what makes everything even worse is how the game kinda like. acts like shinjis death is a stepping stone#like we’re supposed to use it as a wake up call and understand the stakes but keep going on anyways#and akihiko and Ken get. ‘great character development’ according to the game telling you they have now developed#but damn all akihiko is is just repressed he cries for 3 seconds and then is like I SHOULD MAN UP and then neglects a depressed child#shinjis dying words are words to live by now even though they piss me the fuck off like girl am i crazy HES FUCKING#HES TELLING ME NOT TO CRY OVER HIM BECAUSE HE SHOULD BE DEAD ACTUALLY AND THIS IS A GOOD THING ACTUALLY#like if the game wants us to still find meaning in life despite losing someone it just really hurts that shinji has to die for that to work#apparently. cuz the character i see myself in is shinji. not some perfect prettyboy who does everything perfectly and has 4 gfs#his death seems like a punishment for bad behavior. the bad behavior being of course depression and drug use. and im simply supposed to be#better than that if i want to live. and we dont get to form a connection with him cuz thats gayyyyy#and his death is like a NOBLE HEROIC SACRIFICE idk its just such bullshit to me i hate it so bad#how is killing a suicidal guy and then treating it as admirable that he said ‘this is how it should be’ supposed to make me feel#makes me feel sick personally and it ruins the entire game’s theme to me because its fucking shallow and the story is bad and im tired
2 notes · View notes
guinevereslancelot · 1 month
Text
is there any worse feeling than when you feel like someone is mad at you bc they literally are mad at you
#i came into the living room and my dad was yelling abt how he basically hates everyone in the whole family#bc nobody got around to reqding the latest chapter of his book yet#but he was really upset and mad#i get being hurt by that but it literally is not a personal rejection people are just busy idk#he didn't let on he was upset at all until he completely flipped out#now he doesn't want anyone to read it anymore#he's really hurt tho bc we all always read my mom's stuff#and my brother and i talk abt what we're writing together all the time#and i get there's a special kind of hoy sharing your writing with someone but only when they're really interested and engaged#unfortunately the two people most likely to care abt hia book are my two oldest brothers and they dont live w us#so they cant really give him that feedback#he did send hia chapters to them but they arent around to talk abt it and havent responded yet#basically nobody actually cares abt his book#he's been talking abt writing one for like ten years or more and only started in the past few months#its a zombie book and full of his really weird and controversial political and religious takes tho sp its a stressful read#i dont really agree w him on certain issues and we're ok abt it usually but it makes reading it more stressful#anyway#he's really upset tho#and he can only express unpleasant emotions through anger so i shut down and cant interact#and he specifically said he doesnt want people do do the thing he's so hurt that we didnt do#so there's no real way to set things right to alleviate my anxiety#he's a very difficult person to love with sometimes but he's really generous and has done a lot to help me#so i can live my dream and start a business and he's not really pressuring me abt my job seaech and rent and stuff#so it does make me feel guilty that i basically didn't care abt his book#it wouldnt be as bad if literally everyone in the family hadn't also done that#when he does to much for everyone#he's mad at everyone but im the only one having a panic attack and im the only one he didn't yell at#he's not handling his emotions well but neither do i so we usually just dont acknowledge things like this until everyone is over it#but i hate that i literally need conflict to be resolved immediately or i go insane
1 note · View note
blckbrrybasket · 1 month
Text
ᯓ★ 𝐆𝐡𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
MDNI
SFW
- Listens to She Wants Revenge and Rob Zombie
- With some of his jokes one of his favorite ones to pull is on new recruits. When someone asks what his story is or why he wears a mask he loves looking into the distance and saying, “It all started after the incident.”
- You know those tik toks of how someone’s boyfriend sleeps like a dead victorian child? Ghost sleeps like a plank of wood. Even in his sleep he looks like he hasn’t known a day of rest.
- Ghost’s laugh is thick, raspy, and broken up between coughs that only make him laugh harder. It’s full of life.
- If you watch Ghost for awhile you’ll notice the random faces he makes when he doesn’t have the mask on. He’s so used to people not seeing his face that he forgets to mask his emotions, sometimes blatantly making a disgusted face at someone. He has no idea why they fucked off somewhere else but he wasn’t going to ask
- Wears socks to sleep. No one in the task force has let it go.
- Will know he’s wrong in a non-serious argument, however, instead of admitting defeat he’ll say increasingly confusing things until the other person is too confused to keep arguing. It doesn’t do anything for him, he just thinks it’s funny.
- After drinks Ghost becomes a poet with how he talks about the people he loves.
- Ghost is so good at reading lips and has a scarily amazing hearing - Soap or Gaz will whisper something to each other about him and he’ll lean over them to go “what’d you say,” knowing full well what they said. He finds it hilarious watching them stumble on their words.
Tumblr media
SFW (serious)
- Ghost isn’t violent in his day to day life. He has moments of anger like anyone, but he would never hurt anyone he loves. He knows exactly how that feels and would never do that to someone else. Ghost takes pride in how far he’s come.
- Ghost doesnt normally wear his full mask in public, as it would draw way too much attention to him. Instead he wears a black face mask. He was sort of thankful for covid since he could blend into the crowd with his mask for once.
- Ghost is not heartless. No matter how much others try and sell it, he is not a heartless monster. At the end of the day he’s human and he hates that the most. He hates emotions, specifically sadness. It’s hard for him to deal with. Ghost tries not to close himself off, but he naturally deals with things on his own. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t want you to hold him though.
- He doesn’t understand crying over things people can’t solve or adverse reactions. If he sees someone have a ‘irregular’ outburst he has trouble gripping why. Ghost’s brain works very logically and though he struggles to grasp it he tries to understand. He won’t ever be the person who bursts into tears over a movie, but he works hard to understand where someone may be coming from.
- When Ghost talks about feelings he’s usually really blunt with it and says what he feels. He doesn’t like to drag his feet in the emotion and tries to move on from it as fast as he can. Unless he’s drunk then see above. (He’s a laid-back lovey drunk.)
Tumblr media
NSFW
- Contrary to popular belief, Ghost is pretty tame in bed. Every other part of his life is rough but with you in his arms he wants to savor how you feel. If you ask him to be rough he may be depending on his mood but he never does too much and always checks on you.
- It takes awhile of building trust, but Ghost eventually lets you ride him on top. He knows he’s a strong man and stop anything but it takes him a bit to be okay being on the bottom. At first his muscles are nervously wound tight until he feels himself enter. Imagine the universe zooming out dramatically, that’s how his brain feels when he experiences this for the first time with you. He ends up a drooling, groaning puddle.
- Always has a protective hand on you in public. His large palm spreads over the small of your back, sliding to cover your thigh when you sit in a chair. Ghost doesn’t even realize when his fingers instinctively draw circles on the muscle, missing how close they are to your crotch. When he plucks at the fabric of your bottoms and hears your shaky breath he realizes how much he’s riled you up. Don’t worry, he’ll always take care of you.
- Ghost doesn’t tend to jerk off much due to lack of time and not having a high sex drive. He honestly couldn’t care less whether he has sex or not. It’s never crossed his mind as an issue on either side of having it or not. When he does have sex he makes sure it’s fucking good. Ghost’s a thorough guy and he’s very thorough with you.
- Usually in the middle of the scale of preferring receiving or giving. After hearing your sweet noises he leans more towards preferring giving. He would never turn down a blowjob from you though.
- On the quieter side when fucking. Low groans, huffing, and sighs of relief. If you edge him for awhile, however, you can pull a few broken moans from him.
- Doesn’t wear the mask during sex unless you explicitly ask for it. It feels reassuring to bare his full self to you when having sex.
- Has to hide his smile when he sees the scratches down his back. He takes pictures and proudly sends them to you.
- Before getting into aftercare Ghost likes to sit there with you for a bit. He makes sure never to lay for too long so he can clean you up, but he always lays there with you to let the love seep into his bones. Ghost loves replaying the scene in his head to memorize your beauty.
951 notes · View notes
fizzfags · 1 month
Text
EMIZEL/FIZZFANGS ANALYSIS
the long awaited. under the cut bc its really long and im fucking insane. (this does not necessarily focus on them as a romantic pairing, just the way they interact with each other. interpret it in whichever way is most compelling to you/what you see fit.)
EMIZEL:
the most notable thing about emizel is the fact that he is mainly motivated by status and climbing the social hierarchy in whatever situation he is currently in. in his human life, that was climbing the ranks within the demons. after he dies, he doesnt really understand the social hierarchy within vampire society, but he does understand that its very important to at least be in good standing.
Tumblr media
(episode 2)
he has an inherent disrespect towards authority, also seen with his father, (which i will get to later) as seen with this interaction with arthur. he's insistent on meeting the important figures within vampire society in la, and prioritizes this over, say, learning how being a vampire actually works. in the same episode, he also tells arthur "It just seems like we have similar goals, you know? I clearly don't know what I'm doing in vampire society. You do. So I need to learn. And you did say you'd take responsibility for teaching me." keep in mind that this is only a week or so after he was turned. things become interesting when we see him interacting with said important figures.
Tumblr media
(episode 4)
in a stark contrast to arthur, hes relatively polite and respectful. obviously, this is to build favor for himself within the community of important and respected figures. also notable, he is lying out of his fucking ass. this is probably my biggest piece of evidence against the people that genuinely believe that emizel is unintelligent, because he clearly knows what hes doing.
Tumblr media
as stated in the tweet, he gets killed/injured makes stupid decisions so often because he's used to operating under the rules of the demons and normal human society, and he hasnt learned that consequences and rules are enforced much harsher in regards to vampires. his rash and impulsive personality/decision making skills/opposition to authority figures that he doesnt like just isnt compatible with vampire society, and this leads to him getting hurt (see any and all of his interactions with edward)
Tumblr media
(episode 4)
so, we know he lies to get what he wants (status, respect, etc) and doesn't feel bad about it. now is time to address his upbringing. obviously, it was not great. he has a very negative relationship with his father, and it wouldn't be too big of a stretch to describe it as potentially abusive. "Listen, I've lived with this guy my whole life. He's always kind of been a piece of shit to me, so do what you want - I couldn't care any less. But, if you're making me choose between my wellbeing and his, then I'm always going to choose me. Besides, I can't do any of that mind shit anyways." (episode 2) we can most likely assume he joined the demons relatively young, as a way to escape or have a place to stay other than his dads house. this is also probably the source of his opposition to authority, especially those that act negatively towards him.
Tumblr media
(episode 6)
episode 6 is very interesting. emizel risks his life to go back to the unseen one to ask a very specific question: "why did i get abandoned with my father, and why did shilo get to stay?" also noting that his most precious memory is one he had with the demons. when shilo asks about this question, he gets very defensive, because he knows that shilo would have an answer for him, but its not the answer he wants. if he tells them, they wont let him go back to the unseen one. of course, his question is left unanswered, and he asks it again in episode 10.
another very interesting thing happens in episode 10: he willingly gets rid of all memories of his father. he had a lot of other things he could have given up, but he specifically chose his father. with the definite negative impact his dad must have had on him, and how highly emizel prioritizes strength, it wouldnt be a stretch to say that he viewed the trauma of living with his father as a weakness, something to get rid of instead of grow and heal from. it would take time, a resource he isn't willing to share.
Tumblr media
so, why is emizel so motivated towards power and status? with all this, the answer is pretty obvious: he wants to be able to build the life he was never able to have. power and status means money means opportunities means choices means a better life. he wants an escape from la, from his father, from everything he's had to deal with growing up. hes constantly reminding himself that its not fair, its not fair that shilo got to live that way, its not fair he was abandoned and stuck here. so he wants to make it fair for himself and the rest of his posse. those he considers his family. his jealousy motivates him.
so of course a wrench is thrown in everything when he loses that emotional connection to most of his friends (except theo. which i will get to) and finds himself just not caring anymore. the thing hes built his life around, spent years climbing the ranks - all for nothing. but what else can he do but continue on. find another distraction, find another goal.
THEO:
we don't know much about theos past other than he (supposedly) lives in the suburbs and has rich parents. (referenced in episode 8) though this is debatably canon, i think its interesting if it is because it brings up a lot of questions. most notably, why did he join the demons? the most obvious answer is that it's the same as emizel: his parents suck. though of course none of this is canon, so moving onto the things that are.
the first major event that happens to him is emizel being turned. he sees emizel less, "No shit, really? You know Emizel? How is he keeping up? He's kinda, been disappearin' every night." (episode 2) and we can assume emizel is a big part of his life. (which i will get to later) and then, thanks to shilo, a core aspect of his personality is stripped away. his entire life is essentially turned on his head, and he can feel something missing. so, as seen in episode 5, he turns to alcohol. its no surprise why, he's lost the sense of normality, his routine, everything he was used to. so he may as well do this. a lot of theos more interesting aspects only really show when hes interacting with emizel, so time to get to the fun part.
FIZZFANGS AS A WHOLE:
a very interesting thing is that emizel and theo act very differently when talking/interacting with each other than any other character. dialogue-wise, they both talk a lot faster and "messier" around one another, interrupting themselves and eachother to finish each others thoughts.
Tumblr media
(episode 3)
just by their conversations, you can tell they're very close. this particular instance also has two other interesting things in it: theo asking what he can do to help emizel, and condi specifying that theo would be the only person emizel would tell about being a vampire. to address the first part, here is a complete list of all the times theo asks emizel what he should do/what he should do to help/etc (and this is an incomplete transcript, so ive probably missed a couple.)
"Alright, you lead the way man, let's do it." (ep 1)
"What's going on here? What do I do? What do you want me to do, man?" (ep 1)
"No man! I'm not leaving you, man! I can take him. I can still take him." (ep 1)
"I'm not leaving you, man!" (ep 1)
"Well, how can I help you with the non-soda related-?" (ep 3)
"Yeah! I mean... What should I do first?" (ep 3)
"So you just let me know whenever you need? I got you, bro." (ep 3)
"So, uh… Anything I can help with?" (ep 5)
"Don't worry, man. I got you. Where am I taking you?" (ep 5)
"So, um… how, c- how can I help you, man?" (ep 8)
this fucking crazy interaction:
Tumblr media
(episode 3)
so it goes without saying that theo would do anything for emizel. and he does, he stays in the alley even after he gets hurt, he stays even after he watches emizel die. and when emizel crawls over to him, dazed and hungry for blood, he doesnt run. he only runs after emizel tells him to. another really important thing about their relationship is the fact that they're both a constant in each others lives.
Tumblr media
(episode 8)
its kind of like they sort people into two boxes: "theo/emizel" and "everyone else." and the other will always be their highest priority. emizel drives to the other side of la just to see theo. after emizel dies in the club, his first instinct is to go find theo. theo is the only person that the unseen one appears as to him. in episode 8, the first step to his plan is finding theo.
Tumblr media
(episode 6)
even if he hadn't just lot a good amount of emotional connection to the rest of his friends, i think he would still be a lot more urgent to go save him. and again, his first thought is to check if theo is there. if theo's okay, if he's safe.
Tumblr media
(episode 5)
and theo does this too. he insists that emizel is his only friend, the only one he trusts. speaking of trust, that is the most crucial aspect to their relationship. they trust eachother a sickening amount, they regularly put their life in the others hands. when emizel drinks theos blood, its not "is he going to hurt me?" its "how can i make this the safest?" because theo trusts emizel not to hurt him, even after knowing he's killed ~12 people.
Tumblr media
(episode 3)
and here, emizel trusts that theo loves him enough to be okay with this. note that arthur doesn't even bring up love, emizel is the first to. arthur only brings it up after emizel says that. because emizel knows that theo loves him and trusts him, emizel knows that theo would do anything for him.
Tumblr media
(episode 9)
and emizel, notorious for not letting anyone close enough to hurt him, tells theo that if he wants to, not needs, wants, he can kill him. that theo can kill him, if he wants. because emizel doesn't fully trust himself alone, but he trusts himself when he's with theo.
Tumblr media
and theo trusts emizel too. despite seeing what vampires can do in a frenzy, he trusts that emizel wouldn't hurt him, just as emizel trusts that theo would stop him before anything could ever happen. and emizel is a notorious liar, so we can assume that he doesn't/wouldn't lie to theo, which would explain why theo trusts him so much.
Tumblr media
basically, they'll always be there for eachother and theo would do anything for emizel and emizel will always come back to theo in the end and they love eachother and despite everything they are together. theyre completely inseperable.
tl;dr: emizels main MOTIVATION is status, while the most IMPORTANT thing to him is theo
151 notes · View notes
Text
pjo episode four parts that made me scream
Them starting with sally trying teach percy how to swim and percy being scared is fantastic for two reasons: number one, its a normal kid thing and number two it ties into later in the books when we find out percy has a fear of drowning. Its like hoe thalia has a fear of heights and kind of ties into the idea that forbidden children are often afraid of some part of their parents element. I love that theyre bringing in elements of that idea so early!!!
percy’s “can i ask a stupid question” and annabeths “are you trying to make me make fun of you” akdbdkbaaksbdkjsbakks shes so funny
I LOVE THAT THEY BRING UP PAN AND SPECIFICALLY TIE HIM TO MANIFEST DESTINY AND AMERICAS HISTORY OF KILLING ITS INDIGENOUS PEOPLE!!!! ITS IMPORTANT FUCKING HISTORY AND IM SO GLAD THE SHOW ACKNOWLEDGED IT
percy and annabeths little banter, percys stupid accent and then him collapsing on her. That and the scene where theyre talking on the train is the percabeth we deserve!!!!!! God i love them so much
ALSO going back to the scene where theyre talking in bed on the train i love how annabeth knows that grovers grumpy in the morning and percy doesnt. Grover was her protector once too!! (Like they said last episode) and theyve traveled together before!! He was annabeths friend before he was percys
ok everyones already said this but the parallels between annabeth and medusa?!!??? With medusa saying “i was you” last episode and now annabeth getting punished for something percy did ghe same was medusa was punished for something Poseidon did????? Absolutely insane i love it
also the fact that it hurt athenas pride specifically, much like how medusa mentioned the “pride of athena” in reference to annabeth last episode, which all ties back to the fact that hubris is annabeths fatal flaw and she gets it from her mother
THE CUT TO PERCY IN THE FOUNTAIN AND THEM SPLASHING WATER ON HIM AHSKSBJAHAJSJSB theyre so funny for that
Percy just looks like a wet rag this episode and its so well done you can even tell the makeup on his face was done to make him appear paler and sicklier and it works so well
ok PERCY PULLING ANNABETH INTO THE STAIRWELL AND SHUTTING THE DOOR???? Because hes loyal to a fault!!!! And theyre becoming friends!!!!!!!!! And he cares about her more in like a week than athena ever has and its shown to us so clearly in this episode!!!!!!
ONCE AGAIN LUKES MOTIVATIONS ARE GOING TO MAKE SO MUCH SENSE BY THE TIME WE GET TO THE END OF THIS AND WE DONT EVEN HAVE TO SPEND TIME WITH HIM TO UNDERSTAND THEM god this series is so well done
Also the chimeras design looks so cool i love it so much
AND WE FINALLY GET AN ANSWER AS TO HOW PERCY GOT IN THE RIVER FROM THE TOP OF THE ARCH!! (At least in the tv world, in the book world the arch might very well just be in a different spot lol)
Poseidon saves him!! Hes a better parent than athena is apparently
god the episode ending with percy breathing underwater is so good i was on the edge of my seat until the very end
OK LAST THING is that they are continuing the theme sally brings up about monsters not always looking like monsters and heroes not always looking like heroes so well!!! Echidna bringing it up and saying that to her, demigods are more dangerous was fantastic i love how dedicated they are to this
OK ACTUALLY THE LAST THING i love the dichotomy of different mothers in this episode. We start with sally and percy and immediately see how much they love each other and care about each other!!!! Then we get to echidna who cares about her children too by teaching them to hunt!!! And then we get athena who ducking punishes annabeth for something she didnt even do. And its like. That was a little monstrous athena. Im understanding why someone might want to kill their godly parent
GOD THIS SERIES IS SO GOOD
274 notes · View notes
Note
WIBTA if I were to report my ex friend's antisemitism to their university?
So I 20nb have been friends with most my current friend group since we were 11. Two years ago I stopped being friends with a guy in my friend group due to toxic behavior on his part (not antisemitic yet, just giving background info) He would constantly say things like "don't make fun of neurodivergent people's special interests and hyperfixations as they can't help it" and then would go and make fun of my special interests (note: said ex friend has ADHD). Over our friendship he had a lot of double standards like that and one day I had enough. The first time I brought it up he dismissed it as someone else in the friend group did the behaviors I'm accusing him of. I kinda dropped it as I didn't want to deal with that level of denial and thought that if I waited a few days he would have had some time to reflect. So I brought it up again and he continued to blame it being one of our other friends doing it and that I was simply "misremembering". I gave specific examples and rough time frames yet he continued to deny it. All I wanted was a simple "I'm sorry and I will work on that" yet he refused to do that. So I ended our friendship.
Since then we have been on rocky terms. We are still in the same friend group since the issue was between me and him, I didn't want to involve my friends and make people pick sides. He was moving away soon at the time of the end of our friendship so it wasn't like I was going to see him when the friend group all hung our together.
Since we are still in the same friend group, he is in the discord server our friend group has which is just like a massive group chat with things categorized into topics.
Recently there is the current conflict going on in Israel and Palenstine. I am Jewish and vented to the vent section of that discord server about how I have seen people I know irl post online antisemitic things. I am very much against Israels actions and made sure to include that in my vent so no one coukd twist my words. I didn't initially say exactly what I was seeing as I was still processing the fact that I was going to have to cut some people off.
He then replied to my vent saying that he has never seen anything antisemitic online and that if he has, he has seen Jewish people saying that it isnt. I replied that his reply to my vent was weird and that i was talking about people saying that all jews should die. I felt hurt as yet again he was being hypocritical towards me as he has said before that you should say that (what he said) when people complain about seeing hateful things towards a group (eg racism, homophobia, etc).
He then responded that I was only calling him antisemitic because he was arab. The thing is, I never called him antisemitic and I myself am also arab. (Yes I know, most people have never met an arab jew but we do exist).
I pointed out that I never called him antisemitic and I am also arab which he seems to have forgotten. I said that his response was still weird considering what he has said in the past about people who say what he said. I then invited him to dm me privately to discuss things further if he wants to as it's not fair to do this in front of all of our friends.
He did not respond and ended up blocking me on discord.
This irked me quite a bit but in the end I decided that him blocking me was for the better if he stands by his original response. I was talking to my partner about it who is not Jewish and he said that my ex friend's response was definitely weird and the fact that he was so quick to defend himself about being called an antisemite without even being called it was indicative that he probably is. I decided to look at my ex friends tumblr to see if there was anything to suggest that and there was. I saw a few posts which he has recently reblogged which used anti Semitic dog whistles like the echo, example: (((insert text you which doesnt say jew but you are implying jewish people are))).
I was quite appalled to see that and am debating if I should send it to his university. The university he attends has spoken out about antisemitism before and has kicked out people in the past for using racist dog whistles due to a potential danger to POC students so it is likely that he would get kicked out for using antisemitic dog whistles.
In my mind, he fucked around and therefore should find out aka face natural consequences for his actions.
WIBTA if I contacted his University about his antisemitism?
What are these acronyms?
126 notes · View notes
moonshynecybin · 3 months
Note
Hi! I have been thinking about Marc and the ways he expresses his anger... giving the cold shoulder... the silent treatment if you will (he will speak ABOUT vale but not TO vale let alone WITH vale)... need your input please....
hmm good question.... this got. STUPID long sorry
uhhh marc is, in general, good at keeping his (negative) emotions in check. like i think marc loooooves to think of himself on track as a mature, controlled, and rational dude. above distraction. a killer. a cyborg. idk his dad has talked about how he doesnt really complain much about injury and there's also allll these stories about what a mature kid he was... so i think that when he was young - ESPECIALLY in a racing sense because he was so much younger than most of the people he was competing against - he internalized that in order to do all the stuff he wants to do racing-wise, he reallyyyy has to keep a level head and not well. act his age! and i think that extends to a lot of how he manages his emotions today (at least in a public setting). even in places where im pretty sure hes PISSED (sepang. phillip island 2013.) he just kind of. visibly contains himself. not a confrontational dude in the outright sense he'll clench his jaw and try to work through it.
which is part of what makes his valentino-oriented crazy so interesting. bc people were noticing that marc in 2015 was kind of. being weird. as his and valentino's relationship deteriorated. like they were both outwardly very much like we can keep it on track :) until the big fallout towards the end of the year but uhhhh. well marc has said that vale started pulling back in september of 2014 like he was noticing SOMETHING, and they clashed on track A LOT in 2015, and i think marc sensed vale cooling on him and freaked a lil. hashtag neurotic 22 year old moments. he is my favorite crazy ex girlfriend. like usually he IS good at separating that stuff out and managing his emotions in the racing sense but in assen that year when vale overtook him off track after they made contact he raised a BIG stink with race direction and actually had some uh. not especially chill quotes about it. (it should be noted marc was also flopping for the first time in his motogp career. like in his brain he stopped winning AND vale stopped talking to him he was goin through it) adn all the reporters noticed too they were like. why werent you sucking and fucking in parc ferme. like vale's left turn wrt to spaniard sabotage comes outta nowhere but people WERE noticing that things were changing. i bet marc noticed too. BUT they are not the type of people to talk about these things so they keep it to vague flirting in presscons and escalating on-track tension slash proxy wars waged in race-direction contexts... liek truly you are 22 you are not going to keep your championship title and your hot sports idol bestie is no longer flirting with you on twitter and you COULD just talk to him about that but you'd rather DIE so youre going to ask honda to back you up to race direction about your last race where you DEFINITELY lost bc winning is the ONLY thing thatll make you feel better. even though thatll help convince your hot sports idol that you are engaging in a benedict arnold level betrayal scheme against him. an insane time to be marc marquez. 2015 really kind of is a study on how both of them handle losing: NOT WELL.
and then the thing about sepang is that then the lid is blown clean off and marc spends the ENTIRE race being annoying on purposeeeee. hes so fucking pissed and hurt at valentino that he decides to get under his skin for REALSIES instead of focusing on his race. like idk he probably would have fought hard for the win without the drama that how he works but uh. i think he was being annoying specifically to bite at vale's edges. and part of that is bc marc is naturally and effortlessly annoying. but i think part of it was SPITE. like his team advised him not to speak on anything from that presscon and he didnt, but he can still fuck him over on track. get under his skin. like he cant tell vale to his FACE that he's angry and confused and hurt. but he CAN let him know on that fucking racing line. where he cant be ignored. idk like i cant see marc letting anyone else get under his skin like that.
AND another big ass exception to the marc marquez anger management philosophy is from misano 2019 where vale messes with his qualifying lap. a lovely anon sent me some videos of marc talking to the press and jesus christ i dont think ive ever seen him angrier oh my god. AND the anon also linked the race from that weekend where he won and he celebrated harder than ive seen him celebrate some TITLE wins like he went. notably nuts. the commentators were all like uhhhh. he mustve REALLY wanted to get one over on vale adjfhlkdh... idk if any of this answered your question but his relationship to his emotions fascinates me hes so weirddddd. and its interesting to me that he can shrug off jorge ruining his last race at honda and be friendly but also be like. kind of aloofly pissed at bezz. because of valentino! he can repress the rest of it, but valentino shines through the cracks.
109 notes · View notes
despairots · 6 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
#𝐀𝐍 𝐄𝐏𝐇𝐘𝐑𝐀 𝐁𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐌: YUTA OKKOTSU.
「 yuta okkotsu x male! reader 」
GENRE: fluff, just fluff :3 oh, and like a REALLY quick makeout but its really just fluff, i think a bit of angst tho?
CONTENT WARNING: swearing, violence, r! helps yuta with his injuries, i have no idea what the plot is anymore, r! is like kyouka from bsd and has her ability “demon snow”, rika doesnt like r! that much :,(, “demon snow” is somewhat like rika, so rika - yuta and “demon snow” - r!
AUTHORS: stop. changing. themes. *holds me by the throat and shakes me* no but seriously the more i change it the more i have to change my layout which i do NOT want anyways happy furina day!!! we luv u queen
Tumblr media
there’s something that makes people believe you just lack emotions. maybe it’s the you didn’t react to people’s insult, or maybe it’s the way it looks like you’re always in a daze. yeah, you don’t exactly have anything going on in your head and yes, you’re always in a daze but somewhat, you’ve always gave off this rebellious energy, like something was attached to you that’s radiating this energy off.
so when yuta saw a curse behind you while assisting him, he wondered if that was the thing that was radiating off the rebellious energy from your “jellyfish aura” that his other friends would call it. just knowing you hid something below the facade you upheld was admirable, you always had this look that made people think your mind was somewhere else when you are aware.
and the way your voice shouted commands for your curse while you still held that alluring look before you switched your attention to him and helped him up when the enemy was being distracted by your curse, all he could do was stare when you asked if he was injured.
he knew rika didn’t like you holding him so carefully and— oh? you’re so close — making sure he didn’t fall to the ground while the both of you ran from the area. now, he’s watching you patch up his wounds so delicate that he’s convinced you’re afraid that you might hurt him.
yuta doesn’t know if he should speak, ask if you’re okay when he’s the one clearly injured, ask about the ring that’s on a necklace and dangling around your neck. he wonders if you were almost like him, that explains why he was so drawn to you. maki, inumaki and panda (plus gojo) already picked up that you caused him to be rather flustered.
the first time you two met was when yuta was first introduced to you. you had officially came back from your trip and his friends had wanted to throw you a party since they haven’t seen you in awhile. his friends often described you to be somewhat like a jellyfish, he was a tad bit confused by the wording but he understood when you walked into the classroom.
“welcome back, [name]!”
“kelp.”
you just had this look in your eyes when panda scooped you up and hugged you, the way one of your eyes closed when panda smushed your cheeks together and the small— and very unnoticeable — smile on your face when you realized you were missed made him blush.
“this is yuta, he’s new, so try not to overwhelm him. he’s delicate.” maybe when maki had said that, you started to treat him like some doll. always making sure your touches weren’t harming his already injured skin— and he could technically feel rika fuming — with the focused look on your face.
the one thing bugging him was the ring. were you already married or did you dedicate your life to someone else? although, he sounded awfully like a hypocrite right now. he was wearing the ring rika had given him.
“… what’re you thinking about?”
that was the first time he had heard you spoken in such a quiet, yet calm and alluring, tone towards him specifically. he was once told that you didn’t talk a lot and always kept to yourself, only allowing yourself to talk when on the battlefield.
he was shocked nonetheless, the tone of your face had caused him to jump a little and his cheeks to flare up. what should he say in this? should he tell the truth and ask if you were married? but you probably already figured that out by how hard he was staring at the ring.
“oh. um… are you married?” yuta asked timidly, averting his gaze to the ground, hearing the chair scrap and he’s wondering if the question was too insensitive. you only got up to dim the lights as a headache was starting to form before you sat back down infront of yuta.
you grabbed ahold of his cheek and turned to face it towards you, “are you?” you had shot the question back to him and let go of his cheeks, feeling his cheeks heat upon the hand on his cheek. yuta knew you were gesturing to the ring on his finger and he didn’t know how to respond.
he was married but at the same time he wasn’t, he’d seem unfaithful to rika but everytime you touched him, protected him, and now, talking to him, he blushed. and you had picked that up rather quickly.
you hummed, hands wrapping around the ring and looking down at your lap, “i was. he died though.” the way you said it so casually had caught him off guard, but your situation was similar to him aswell. yuta picked up the way your hand tightened around the ring as he stared down at his, fiddling it around his ring finger.
“the cursed spirit that’s always around you. what’s her name?” he looked back at you, blinking and suddenly, you just looked… too unrealistic? was that the right weird to describe you? “her name’s rika.” and you smiled. his heart started to pound against his rib cage when you held a soft smile, “you’d love her no matter what form, huh?”
he wondered if you were rika if she was a male and your sentence made sense to him. now, he wondered about your cursed spirit, “what about yours?” “yuta.” hearing his name come out your lips had him confused, were you trying to tell him that you didn’t wanna speak about it or—
“oh. oh!”
the cursed spirit was named yuta. you weren’t trying to call out his name, you were trying to tell him that the cursed spirt’s name was his name. you lightly smiled amusingly at his reactions, “i don’t think rika likes me very much… nor do i think yuta likes you.” it seemed that way. yuta could feel rika wanted to kill you and you could feel “yuta” glaring daggers at the boy infront of you.
turns out you two were the same.
you stood up from your chair before bending down to yuta’s height and placing a kiss on the corner of his lips. were you trying to die? did you want yuta to die?! no. honestly enough. like yuta, you would’ve loved your cursed spirit no matter the form aswell.
“i like you, yuta.” it was a simple confession yet yuta’s face blew up into red, hearing you walk away. “ah! w-wait!” he had grabbed your wrist and turned you around, wrapping his arms around you and buried his face into the crook of your neck before muttering words that made the tension from your shoulders to relax.
“i… i like you too, [name].” he pulled away and softly placed his lips onto yours. your hands reaching up to cradle his cheeks as yuta backed you up to a desk and helped you sit on top of it before going back to kissing you.
he was a good kisser considering the fact he has never kissed anyone before… well, technically, not a human being.
you pulled away, a string of saliva connecting the both of your lips until it disconnected when your hand was brought up to your mouth and oh, was that blush he saw? were blushing because of him? so cute.
“i don’t think they liked that very much..”
oh right!
Tumblr media
340 notes · View notes
Text
The odd one.
Tumblr media
Tav x Everyone
Warnings: depressions ; self harming behaviour ; bad english ; bad written lol ; im not good at writing endings ngl ; self doubts ; thoughts about suicide and even mentions ; descriptions of wounds ; teeny tiny bit of fluff ; drama ; angst ; idk poly relationship?
Note: hello everyone who thinks this is gonna be good lol. Its just a little drabble i really wanted to write but thats like my first fic/drabble ever so please be kind :') still i hope you enjoy that small thingy. Also i used they/them as tavs pronouns and theres no specific description to their look. Also there might be typos etc. English is not my native language!
If someone has to describe tav than they would probably take the word "odd". Odd because they were so clumsy that it was nothing new when they tripped over their own feet or stumble right into a trap, indicators where most started to think that they're absolutely not capable of fighting or at least not being good at it. Most would think that they're just gonna stumble into sword, or spells, and call it a day. But, much to everyones suprises, it wasnt like that. Tav was rather good at slaying things, beheading goblins or punch someone so hard that they're loosing foot - they were even good at taking hits until their nose run bloody and their lips were chapped, even bruised. The description of "odd' was perfect for them and still, it seems that there were even more things about them that made them so weird. Not only had they a habit of not treating their wounds probably, no, they also tried to downplay them and saying that they are not as bad as you think it is. Even when shadowheart tried to heal a claffing wound on their arm they just tried to get away from her healing spell - something about "dont waste it in me shadowheart, keep it until someone really needs it. Wyll got wounded too". It was weird but no one really questioned it, they shoved it onto the fact that tav was indeed a very selfless person. Always trying to do something good or even trying to give most of their being to people so that they didnt have to suffer - may it be a healing potion, a weapon or even the safe space behind a wall. Tav would always give up things like that, taking hits for every companion they got ans smile at them afterwards with reassuring words because "it doesnt hurt that much! Dont you worry!"
It was only time later when they found out the truth and its all because of that artist. Someone who they thought they're never gonna see ever again but here he was with a ghost in front of him and said ghost was just so mad at him that everyone was ready again to fight but instead they got to hear the whole story and when the ghost said why she was dead tavs eyes got dull for a second.
A second where it felt as if the ocean crashed right onto them, waves of unspoken sadness and a hidden longing no one wanted a admit, tidal waves who threaten to consume every last single bit of them, swallowing them whole and keeping them right into their embrace. It was as if someone spoke the right words for a curse to be lifted, a lingering curse everyone knew that it existed but no one wanted to admit. It was only then where everyone kind of knew why tav did things the way they did, why they never quite let their wounds heal or reopening them again in a battle. Why they never quite cared enough about themself to even try to heal anything about them. Why they never really took onto the pretty words everyone said to them in and out of camp, why they shied away from any ounce of love even though every single one loved them with such a burning passion that it would burn them and they would happily accept it. They would love to crumble under that heat and still they never really got it, of course they exchanged small little affecrionate gestures like hugs, cuddles or kisses on the cheek but it never seemed to go further than that. They knew that their tav was in shatters and pieces, still they tried to but them back together.. it just seemed that they never quite made it. As if it they were million miles away even though tav was right infront of them. Still that didnt stopped any of them to express their love for their leader, there was still hope that one day they would get into that broken little heart. Maybe they just needed time? Maybe love wouldnt heal them completely?
Maybe everything came into a full picture right here and then even though it was just a small second. After that incident everyone went back to camp where the inevitable came - all of them wanted to know what was going on but no one really dared to ask. It was such a delicate topic, they were scared that their beloved leader would built up even more walls, what they didnt know was the fact how much tavs heart ached - how much they yearned for the love they could have and even the relationship what was right infront of them. The only thing holding them back was fear. Fear that every single of them would see them as they see themself. That they would leave them with their heart in their hands and crush it like fallen leaves from a tree. They were so love and touched starved sometimes it felt like they were going crazy! They wanted all of this to be real and still there was a small voice in their heads telling them that they deserved none of this, that they are not important enough that someone would even care when they were gone. Just died in a battle or got swept away from the absolute. That all of them just love them because they were travelling together and as soon as the journey ends they going seperate ways. Astarion would live the life he wanted, karlach would get her own small home again, laezel fullfilling her wish of ascending, wyll roaming the coast, gale going back to tara and his tower, shadowheart living with her parents and halsin going back into the shadowlands so he can be with his old and beloved friend. That sounded real. That sounded like it would happen and not their little dream of living with them until death itselfs collects them. Still.. they dreamed about that little fantasy everyday, selfishly wanting that and nothing more. Just living in peace with every person they love.. then why does their heart hurt so much as soon as they're showing love for them? Is it too good to be true? Were they scared? Probably everything of the above.
So they really needed to talk to them all of them. And they're gonna do that, letting all of them into that broken heart of theirs and allowing themself to be happy?
... maybe if they let a little bit of sunshine into their pierced heart they may allow themself to dream a little longer with the. To accept the love they wanted to give. Maybe it wasnt such a bad wish after all?
186 notes · View notes
limelade · 10 months
Text
ill explain specifically why bots conversation with cabby + the way its portrayed is harmful. evil twitter thread to tumblr blog conversion time first off, AE potrays bot messing with cabby by lying to her for laughs. i understand iii is a childrens media and it would be fine under most context, but since cabby has memory disabilities and connects her self worth to the accuracy of her files, playing it as a joke feels cruel. bot isnt doing it to be cruel! bot doesnt know about cabby’s memory disability, but the tone of the show plays it off as though but isnt doing anything wrong when they are. plus, cabby’s intent when asking bot info about themselves is to precent herself from saying more things that could upset them in the future (her insensitive comment abt bot being a replica). she isnt writing the files or asking for info out of malice, she’s trying to use her memory aids to prevent herself from hurting other’s feelings in the future.
bot lying to her just feels cruel and unnecessary, since cabby isn’t trying to use the information in a way that would hurt them. bot’s reasoning for distrusting cabby’s is pointless. cabby needs accurate info and facts because otherwise she physically cant remember anything. cabby doesnt share files willy nilly either, she has only ever shared contestant files with test tube for the sake of the competition, but that would be the same thing as someone who didn’t have a memory disability sharing what they can remember abt a contestant verbally
but bot doesn’t let cabby use her memory aid, which cabby agrees to. it would have made more sense if bot just told cabby to keep the file private, which im sure cabby would have! the reason she elimed fan was bc he took a file without asking first, invading her privacy!
and this is the most dangerous message to send to someone with a memory disability. becuase oftentimes manipulators will prevent them from recording things that are said to them to more easily gaslight them later. im not saying bot is trying to do this, they arent, but its still a bad message to tell people with memory issues to not keep personal record of “private conversations”. keeping these records is how mentally disabled and physically disabled people keep themselves safe! not everyone in the world is a good, genuine person!
i don’t understand why the message AE seems to be sending is that cabby’s disability aid is a bad thing! its not a bad thing to keep records! its a good thing, actually, for disabled people to protect themselves! and cabby isn’t in danger in ii, but its still an unsafe message to send to say she shouldn’t keep records to keep her facts straight. ae tries to justify this by implying that the people around cabby are there to support her; but she shouldnt be told to stop protecting herself because she should trust she’s safe
Tumblr media
Tumblr media Tumblr media
This scene is framed as a heartwarming moment when its the most unsafe thing someone could say to a disabled person. If someone prevents you from using an aid and tells to rely on them instead, thats a RED FLAG. this is a common way for abusers to increase your dependance on them
IM NOT SAYING BOT IS AN ABUSER. BUT FRAMING THIS POSITIVELY IS UNSAFE. say im reading too much into a childrens media but for SOME CHILDREN THIS MIGHT BE THEIR FIRST EXPOSURE TO ANOTHER CHARACTER W MEMORY ISSUES!
at the end of the episode cabby leaves her file behind. HER DISABILITY AID BEHIND. why Is That the Moral You Want. Disability aids are so disabled people can be more independant. why are you using your disabled character have the “be more open and vulnerable” arc?? disabled people are already one of the most vulnerable minorities! do not push this idea to stop them from protecting themselves!
okay sorry guys end of my evil ramble. um. smile emoji. for the tumblrinas
148 notes · View notes
gibbearish · 4 months
Text
wanted to throw my hat into the ring specifically in regards to james responding to the bigotry claims bc i havent seen anyone address the aspects i wanna talk abt in full yet, it kinda got long as fuck for a p short excerpt so putting it under a readmore
so here's the section (text from @storagebay29 's v helpful transcript):
"I never ever intended to hurt anybody. I never thought that that's what I was doing. Before I went- before I went to the hospital,¹ I read a lot of stuff from people who were really hurt, not just authors and stuff but people who watched my videos who were hurt by stuff in them. People think that I hate ace people and women and bisexual people and lesbians and that's not true. It's really- it's just- it’s not true. And I’m sorry that stuff made it into videos² that just shouldn’t have been there: misinformation and lies... But I promise you I did not write that stuff.³
I should have been a lot more exacting when Nick and I would be editing scripts but I promise you that those are not- I don't think those things.⁴ I specifically want to apologise to asexual people who feel⁵ that I just completed delegitimised you. Nick being ace, I- I know that it's kinda like you know, no two gay people are exactly the same, no two ace people are exactly the same, but I kind of, when it came to that I just kind of ran with Nick's judgement⁶ and his observations and stuff like that. And I’m not trying to throw Nick under the bus,⁷ which a bunch of people are saying that I was setting him up as doing, which is not true…"
so! let's break this down
¹ "Before I went- before I went to the hospital" - firstly i want to be clear of my position with the "did he actually attempt" question bc ive seen some people being absolutely vile already, which is that while i understand doubting his story considering his history of lying and manipulation and obviously skewed moral compass, i also feel like it is VERY much plausible enough that publically speculating abt whether it's true or not is shitty, especially telling HIM you think he's lying. best case scenario you're right, worst case scenario you're crossing a hell of a line, and he's obviously done enough stuff that the situation can be addressed pretty comprehensively without risking getting that coin flip wrong. i think we should proceed under the assumption that lying about that is one line he wouldn't cross, and if proof comes along that he was lying then obviously fuck him, but otherwise i think that aspect should be off limits. and having said all that, even under the assumption he is telling the truth, the way he brings it up in this apology is still manipulative, as many have already pointed out, and this is an excellent example. by bringing it up right before addressing his bigotry, he a) implies to the audience that these comments in particular are a notable part of what sent him there, and therefore plants the idea that if they continue to address it while knowing how badly it's already affecting him, they'd be deliberately trying to hurt him or push him to attempt again, and b) tries to distract the audience from the fact that he's addressing his bigotry and get them to go easy on him, since clearly he's already punished himself over it enough. but harming yourself does not actually make up for harm caused to others, and even if it did, unlearning the bigotry that caused the harm in the first place doesnt end at "feel really bad about it," that's actually step one. and as i'm sure you're already aware and i'll get into more in points 4 and 5, whether he's even at step one yet is doubtful!
² "And I’m sorry that stuff made it into videos" - others have covered his passive voice the whole way through so i won't dwell too long beyond pointing it out, it's mostly just highlighted here bc of how it ties into the next point
³ "But I promise you I did not write that stuff." - just, beautiful in so many ways. performance art, even. firstly, the fact that one of the closest places he comes to calling it plagiarism is in defense against a second allegation? just lmao. and secondly, this is about the most solid proof you could get that he indeed did not watch hbomberguy's video (or at least the whole thing) because hbomb very conclusively showed that if there are /any/ original thoughts of James' in his scripts, it is the bigotry, because he showed multiple examples of James /specifically/ rewording things he plagiarized to ADD IN the bigotry. so then tying back to point 2, his passive voice then becomes about ten times funnier here because he was just. blissfully unaware we all already knew exactly how it "made it into" the script and that his next statement would be a lie. just incredible
⁴ "I don't think those things." - notice the lack of specificity here, the most he can say is "people think i hate these groups" and "i don't think those things" and not "this is exactly what i said that was harmful, here's how it was harmful, here's the correct version of it, and here's how to avoid similar pitfalls in the future", yknow, like what people do when they actually accidentally say bigoted things bc they don't know any better? and again this point ties into the next one:
⁵ "I specifically want to apologise to asexual people who feel that I just completed delegitimised you." - ah yes, nothing says apology like "i'm sorry you felt like what i said was hurtful," where the message is less "i did something wrong and hurt you, i regret this and want to fix it," and more "you were too sensitive and got your feelings hurt by something i didn't intend to be hurtful, but i GUESS i'll be the bigger person and say sorry even though i didn't actually do anything wrong🙄". and see again 4, if he actually had looked into it and learned why it was wrong, he wouldn't be saying people "felt" delegitimised. he would be explaining why people reacted that way ie what it was a reaction to, why this reaction was correct, and providing actual information about asexual people. but he doesnt, because he didnt, because he doesnt care. which is all ESPECIALLY fucked because in saying it this way he's. delegitimising what they were saying. like some kind of fuckin aphobia ouroboros
⁶ "when it came to that I just kind of ran with Nick's judgement" + ⁷ "And I’m not trying to throw Nick under the bus" - here we are, the crown jewels. so obviously ppl are already talking abt the performative allyship of "but my best friend is minority and they said it was fine!!1!" which is fucked up on its own, but then the fact that he immediately jumps to "and also i'm not throwing nick under the bus" shows us that within the greater context, point 6 did indeed mean "the bigotry in the scripts that i am currently apologizing for and explaining the presence of in this section is there because i repeated the things nick told me were true, these ideas originate from him." aka blame nick, not me. but then he remembered that scapegoating nick is also something people are accusing him of so he had to backtrack over it, which if it was actually an innocent statement, it yknow. wouldn't need to be backtracked over? it's like he thinks just because he doesn't outright say "nick has bigoted ideas that i parroted so basically its his fault" that no one can pick up on the subtext? and frankly i don't know much about nick (or james beyond this whole thing tbf so obv take everything i say with the whole shaker of salt) so this very well could be the truth to a degree, but if nick does hold bigoted views too, that's TOO. not instead. for james to repeat them without question to the camera means he doesn't disagree. even if hbomb hadn't proven the bigotry did originate from him, it would still be meaningless, because if it came from nick then that would just mean james decided to stay close working friends with a shitbag and repeat all of his garbage to his fans uncritically!
so in summary, in just this one chunk he: reminds you to be extra niceys to him because hes delicate right now, immediately lies about where the bigotry came from, talks around what he actually said wrong or that he was in the drivers seat for it, then blames nick for it before hearing himself say it out loud reminds him people are picking up on that now too and has to walk it back.
to spoof the roblox oof video: when we look at the sum collective of all of his claims regarding his bigotry, and we put it in context with. the fucking everything about him. when james says the bigotry didn't come from him, this might just be me. but I don't believe him!
92 notes · View notes
ultra-raging-ghost · 4 months
Text
Im real nervous main tagging this because ive said my main peace and i dont wanna clog the tag up, but i will say after some context given i have a couple more thoughts?
tw// SA, r//pe mention, etc.
This will be a controversial statement. Me personally, i dont really honestly care? About what he said? It was eight years ago and he hasnt repeated the actions so i dont honestly and truly care what he did eight years ago, he was 19 then hes like 26 now theres honestly and truly a BIG maturity distance between 19 and 26, but also it was. Eight years ago? Thats all i have to say on that?
I Also dont really care for how it was brought to light, from what ive heard from pt speakers the expose was done by someone whos publicly anti towards the Brazilian CCs and ive heard they've dug up some dumb things about pac that werent "hot" enough to get trending i guess and definitely werent condemnable enough to get him cancelled, so it's honestly and truly in my heart something i see as being done in bad faith.
Alongside this, ive seen translation screenshots from one of the "victims" (not sure her stance on being called this so its in quotes) stating she does NOT want to be aligned with these allegations and has changed her username and profile picture because she honestly doesnt wanna be involved and doesnt want it being spread around, this is something else i view as bad faith and if anyone was affected by this then its the best thing to do as they wish, this not only affects the person being called out but also their victim negatively, especially if the victims profile is easily attached to their real life and especially when the victim is a female victim of assault or rape or anything like that, i hate to say it but as an afab person ive seen it firsthand that thats honestly the culture surrounding assault victims, and most people dont want that being brought up or put out in the public. Im a victim myself - people view you differently, it affects platonic and romantic relationships, it affects jobs, you are actively hurting the victim by spreading this if they dont want you to do so and arent prepared for that to be spread around.
From what ive seen, some people are condemning Forever for getting a lawyer - i dont view this as him being automatically guilty. I view this as him getting a lawyer because this person on twitter has been actively harassing not just him but all the brazilian CCs on the QSMP. This is harassment, the case against them will hold up in court and Forever has said he will speak about this more when everything is said and done
Alongside this, i will say im unhappy with Forever specifically for his statement on the situation. It wasnt handled the way we wouldve liked it, but it also wasnt handled via ukelele, it wasnt handled the worst way it could've been. Ive heard pt speakers say it was kind of formal, there was some slang in there but overall i've read the translated statement and to me it sounds more like a legal statement than anything - he mentioned having a lawyer, chances are the lawyer helped him write it. To me it doesnt sound like anything he'd fully say which is why i was so put off by it at first but this makes more sense to me honestly, i dont know if anyone would agree with this.
TL;DR
All in all, i think its a shitty situation but nothing to condemn Forever over. I ask people be thoughtful regarding the girl affected, and dont spread shit around with her name or profile attached to it unless she states otherwise. It was handled badly on Forever's end and blew up WAY too fast on twitter.
I've generally seen people be well behaved on here, ive seen some strong statements but otherwise i like to think we're better than twitter.
This probably wont be my last post on this as we get more on the situation over the next couple days, but this is my main thoughts right now. I'm still choosing to remain neutral, but more mixed than anything.
55 notes · View notes
saltpepperbeard · 6 months
Note
I cant stop thinking about the end of episode 6, specifically the Stede and Ed of it all.
Just the look on Stede's face when he pulls Ed in kills me. I need to know everything in there, in words.
Also, what do you think wouldve happened if instinct hadnt taken over? Would they have actually talked it through (as a crew?) Or would Stede have just brushed over it again and Ed accept it?. This is pretty much the only time he tries to actually help stede like this.
Also, because im rambling, why doesnt Ed defend Stede properly when people insult him? does he think it just doesnt affect him or something?
Pardon the tardy answer on this one, anon! I was in the void, only to get decked upside the head by Leslie Jones once I crawled out of said void lol. BUT OKAY OKAY-
*rubs hands together like a fly*
Tumblr media
This face absolutely kills me too. And I feel like it says so much without saying a word at all. I feel like it says, "I'm so happy and relieved to see you right now because the true torture of the night was seeing you get threatened." And, "I love you so much for checking up on me, but I don't have it in me to use words right now, and can't really express what I'm feeling any other way than through actions." And, "I'm so terrified after what just happened, but having you here is such a grounding force."
Like just...the glassy sheen to his eyes but the relief to his overall visage...Mr. Darby I'm billing you for damages <3 sdjksldls. I think he was just so so happy to see Ed in that moment, and so relieved to have him after nearly losing him again.
And as far as talking things through goes...I honestly feel like Stede still would have stayed clammed up. I have a feeling it would have been like how it was when he initially opened the door, ie Ed doing the talking/leading the conversation while Stede stays quiet. Maybe Ed sharing such deep feelings and vulnerability would have eventually pried his shell open and gotten him to express a few fears? But idk, because at the same time, Stede witnessed Ed's bathtub moment, and it didn't really shake any of his own personal walls.
I just think he has such a complicated thing going with his own self-image, masculinity, and trauma, that it would have been very very difficult for him to openly admit to pain/terror/etc etc—especially weakness. Especially the thing that earned him vitriol and stones and death threats. And especially not to the man he respects and looks up to so much.
And SPEAKING of which, in regard to your last question, I think Ed doesn't step in to defend him for two reasons. One, he's the protector against physical abuse, whereas Stede is the protector against verbal abuse. This lovely post here [x] explains it beautifully; "they're both protecting each other from the dangers they know." Ed acts very quickly if some sort of physical harm threatens Stede, whereas Stede acts very quickly if some sort of vitriol threatens Ed. Neither of them want the other to experience the pain they're so acclimated to, and subsequently are each other's defender from such.
And two, sort of along those lines, I don't think he recognizes the hurt that can come from it, just as Stede maybe doesn't recognize the hurt that can come from all the violence. Maybe he doesn't realize how deeply it has cut Stede, just as Stede doesn't really recognize how deeply violence has cut Ed. I don't know how to word this properly lol but like...they view what hurts the other as almost a non-issue.
You can see their varying reactions and differences a few times in episode 6 actually. When Ned is physically torturing them, Stede doesn't really react when Ed is burned, but Ed reacts strongly when Stede is burned. And when Ned is flinging vitriol about prior to the violence, Ed doesn't really react to it, but Stede scowls and fights against his restraints.
And then when they're on deck, Stede doesn't think to take cover when the attack is starting, but Ed immediately flings himself in front of him. And when Ned is trying to goad Ed into getting upset, Ed doesn't take the bait whatsoever, whereas Stede steps up and gets upset on his behalf.
Not to mention also, Stede being like "Haha escaping violence? Not bloody likely" the morning after. I know that's episode 7 lol, but my pOINT STILL STANDS. They both expect those things respectively—Ed expects insulting talk from other pirates, and Stede expects violence in their line of work, but they're actually rife with trauma for the two of them.
TLDR, they balance each other and ground each other so well, but imagine how much more they would if they shared all these deeper thoughts. I'm still holding out hope that Stede will have his bathtub moment in season 3, or even just show a lick of vulnerability around Ed. Maybe the domesticity/concept of marriage will scare him enough into opening up a bit more/talking things through, or even just settling into a more mature relationship with Ed will give him the grounds to do so.
REGARDLESS, they are just a broth that's....*Roach voice* beautiful, complicated, balanced...
82 notes · View notes
knightobreath · 2 months
Note
Ok I gotta know
What’s your thoughts on that one anon (🐝)’s takes
context 1 and context 2
ohohohohhohohoohohohoh. ohohohoh. Well. Basically they're wrong about what headcanons ARE and how they work as a fan created thing. They also definitely need to examine why they feel the way they do about headcanoning characters as having marginalized identities. I wrote a whole essay on trans headcanons specifically under a similar ask and what I said can be easily applied to other aspects of headcanoning characters as minorities (i actually got a lot of the ideology for that essay from discussions of "blackwashing" in fandom)
some other things on what they said (warning: LONG)
My major issues with their thoughts on headcanons can be summed up with the essay i linked. im not going to be going into that stuff as deeply again because we would be here all day, so the rest is just specifics
"but i really hate it when people change pronouns of characters (IVE SEEN PEOPLE USE SHE/HER WHEN REFERING TO SILVER SPOON. LET THE MAN BE A MAN IF HE WANTS TO BE A MAN.)"
Silver Spoon, and other characters for that matter, are quite frankly not real and do not have actual desires or feelings that you can hurt. Also see my essay on trans headcanons.
"but what makes me the most furious is... people making characters autistic. nothing against autism, i understand that, but do you really need to make paper, fan, silver spoon, pen, etc. autistic just because they have specific interests or act... idk, just the way they act?! its just. it doesnt make sense to me."
Bee needs to examine why they feel the way they do about autistic headcanons. A majority of the times characters are being headcanoned as autistic, they're being headcanoned as that be actual neurodivergent people who seem themselves or their autistic friends in these characters or traits.
There are certainly some issues with certain aspects of autistic (or any other disability) headcanons, like infantilization, but Bee's issue seems to be the fact that there are a lot of characters being headcanoned. Which is just not a problem.
"hc's that dont affect story are fine, but ones that completely flip the story or ignore anything confirmed by the employees."
Headcanons are personal thoughts on the story and do not have any bearing on the story or how you interpret the characters. They are a fan creation like fanart or fanfiction.
"EX: "i headcanon that mic and knife are in a relationship!" that completely ignores the fact that some of the pride month art shows that knife is gay. Cakebrunch (official II storyboarder) confirmed that soap and mic are in a relationship."
Cakebrunch is not a writer and does not have any bearing on the written canon of the characters. Just because he works on the show does not mean his headcanons have any bearing on the canon.
"make as many autistic characters you want, yeah! its great to support autism! but you dont have to make every character autistic, okay? (directed towards people that hc lots of characters as autistic)"
Again, the people who are doing this are mostly autistic or otherwise neurodivergent. And they aren't "making" the characters autistic, they're depicting them as such. No harm in that.
Now for the ships ask.
This is less of my domain, as I'm not really a shipper and don't know much about romance and relationship dynamics but I will try.
Also like nothing against people who don't like shipping as a whole, I totally get it. I was in your boat before.
"i absolutely HATE osc ships. half of them are either "oh these characters dislike each other/disliked each other at one point" and the other half is "these two friends should date because theyre friends.""
and that leaves..... characters who haven't interacted?
honestly, if this was between real people that would be really disrespectful.
Except they're not, so it's completely fine. I have a feeling Bee was in an RPF heavy fandom before this one, this and the previous take about pronouns are common discourse points in those.
EX: Fantube. yeah, they tried to raise shimmer together and built bot, but platonic parents exist and CAN THEY JUST BE FRIENDS?! PLEASE?
Like headcanons, ships have no bearing on the canon and in canon they are just friends.
EX: Nickloon. ok, nickels trying to make up for being rude to balloon all throughout season two. but really? they dont have to date just because theyre friends, yknow. imagine someone saying "oh you and your best friend who you only platonicallly love- you should date!" to you. that'd honestly be rude.
They're not real so they can't experience this. Problem solved.
yeah, some ships are confirmed but thats different. EX: Knickle. offical II storyboarder Cakebrunch CONFIRMED theyre in a relationship. thats an official employee of the series saying that a ship is real. not some random person on TikTok saying that TennisGolf is canon because TB is GB's closest ally.
Again with citing Cakebrunch's fan stuff as canon. Interesting how they cited a storyboarder's fan works twice but failed to mention Balloon being arospec as said by a show creator in the nickloon section. While I have my thoughts on word-of-god confirmation, which I will not be getting into here, it is far more canon than any fanwork.
A lot of the rest of this is just confusion about why people ship things. This is different for each ship and each shipper, and if you're ever confused about where a ship came from you can just ask the shipper. There's usually a reason (and depending on who you ask, a whole essay) as to why a ship came about or how it would work. Sometimes though it is just for fun or comedy, and that's not really a bad thing. We're here to enjoy ourselves, after all.
One last thing though,
and dont get me started on those ships that throw certain characters in canon ships (looking at you, metallic salad/metallic salad + mephone shippers.) because like. why? certain characters have established relationships with others, and your just like "ohh well those two are in a relationship, but mic and knife are a cute ship so how about mic + knife + pickle? makes sense!" like. please.
I don't know much on dynamics and specifics (see: not much of a shipper) but from what I have seen of multiships and polyships, all the dynamics and how the characters would all work together is very much thought about.
Also knickle isn't canon and the people shipping knife x mic x pickle are also aware knickle isn't canon. Nobody is thinking of it like that.
Anyways, time for the conclusion.
Bee anon is fundamentally wrong about how fandom works. Headcanons and ships hold no baring on the canon or your interpretation of the canon. Fandom is a place where canon is transformed in fan works for the fan's enjoyment, it is not a place where canon is determined or changed. You can interpret a work however you please, you can even divorce it from fan works entirely if you wish. Bee also has some things they need to think about in regards to why they feel the way they do about queer and autistic headcanons.
Thanks for reading.
35 notes · View notes
ryn-stillstanding · 11 days
Text
why doesnt anyone want me?
what did i do? i keep asking myself. i want to ask other people, but i am worried that they will add it to their lists as to why they wont be with me.
oh god my brain hurts, i dont know how i am supposed to live with these memories.
people i have dated get brought up in conversations, because they are a part of me, they are just another part of my story. the name, or that specific memory, isn't what makes me upset. its that, everytime it happens, it brings on a flood of other memories - moments and words - that make me feel sick
for example, my first-ever boyfriend. he wouldnt talk to me in school, he wouldn't be seen with me, i broke up with him. whatever, i wasn't that interested anyway. but that leads to the first boy i loved, even though i had no right to - a boy that would kiss me, but wouldn't talk to me. who was interested in me, but wasn't interested in me. which brings me to another boy who, to which i thought, finally, the one that loves me and i love him too. and then he left, due to circumstance. it wasn't even me. and i told myself that because it was what he told me.
the night he broke things off, i got so drunk that i blacked out my vomit, and my tears, and my angry messages to him. i feel sick writing this. i said so many things, i looked pathetic. how could i have believed him? how could i have believed what he told me? how could i have believed someone would think that way about me?
and, every time since then - every time i try to find someone again - i never seem to be enough to make them want to be with me. am i not pretty enough? am i not feminine enough? too boring? too excited? I've tried being myself. ive tried being better than myself. ive tried being anyone other than myself.
still nobody wants me.
and, now, im alone. its been many years since ive felt one with another person. that i felt... not lonely. is it too much to ask to be held by someone? is it too much to ask to be listened to? is it too much to ask not to be alone anymore?
i guess i am just not good enough. not for anyone else. and not for me.
20 notes · View notes