#am I emotionally constipated? | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

star4daisy · 9 months

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Wife on her duty as a perfect wife i'm!

For the asking game, babe. Give me what i need... 3, 4, 14, 17, 19, 30, 35, and 43 (even tho i already know the answer).

Lov u sfm🖤

omg it was a joke luv <3

3. Describe the creative process of writing a chapter/fic

I'm the worst person to answer this I have no process sometimes I plan everything out and then write based on that and actually do what I planned, most times the characters take life and change everything and I keep trying to go back to the original plan and sometimes can still fit some things, usually not lol when I have time I just go with the flow and then if I'm interrupted I have to write down what I want to happen next otherwise I will not remember when I open the docs again, on the good days I write without actually thinking about it so I don't remember it well just feels like my fingers can't type fast enough lol very automatic

4. Where do you find inspiration for new ideas?

(I think I've answered this before in a better way) everywhere, things come to me at the most random times, usually when I'm daydreaming before falling asleep, sometimes by other books, tv shows or music but mostly it just feels like I spent six years of my life repressing my creative side so I could do physics and calculus so now that I'm letting it loose it's running wild lol

14. how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

I don't write emotional scenes, I can't do emotional or vulnerable therefore neither can my characters which is why I mostly write from Barty/Evan's pov lol it's a different type of emotional I guess I have a dificulty in making my characters say I love you, I just cringe so badly. I don't feel what they feel at all lol and the only personal experience would be from emotions like anger

17. What do you do when writing becomes difficult? (maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)

inspiration never lacks the problem is the lack of time, but when things aren't flowing I stop and go watch something, read or go to the gym until my mojo comes back

19. What is the most-used tag on your ao3?

Morally Ambiguous Characters and Graphic Depictions of Violence

30. Do you share rough drafts or do you wait until it’s all polished?

sometimes I just post the draft lol I cannot re-read things before posting so the first few people reading are definetly getting screwed over sorry, but then I feel the pressure of having people seeing all my mistakes and it forces me to go polish it

35. What is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain?

question what are his motives and why did he chose that path and maybe not make him one-dimensional like his whole purpose isn't just to go against the hero, make him compelling, make us believe in why he chose that path make us understand him and feel sorry for his motivations, I always like that lol

43. Do you take a sadistic joy in whumping your characters, or are you more the "If you hurt them I would kill everyone and then myself" kind of person?

Definetely the first, I'm very disattached to death, I have cried in very few fics and it's not when people die lol sometimes living is more painful so I never expect people to say they cried and when they do I'm always in shock

thx <3 I thought this was gonna be harder lol but maybe I just didn't answer as I should lol

#am I emotionally constipated?#feels like I am after writing this #ask game #author ask game

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comradekatara · 4 months

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“the runaway” where everything is the same except when sokka says he can’t even remember what his mother looks like, katara angrily stomps all the way into town to make a purchase, then stomps all the way back up the cliffside, and just indignantly holds up a hand mirror to sokka’s face.

#necessary disclaimer before anyone implies that this post was solely intended to be comedic #no it isn’t I am well aware of the tragic implications at play here thank you #I was very much intending to break hearts with this one :)#katara #sokka #kya&sokka #katara&sokka #actually im sure katara already owns a hand mirror #but for the purposes of this post the idea that she had to go purchase one is funnier #and she doesn’t even bother getting changed. half dressed soaking wet like ‘yes id like your cheapest mirror please’#‘I have to prove a point to my stupid emotionally constipated brother.’

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jade-len · 4 months

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please help i just had a dream where svsss was a dating sim. so, of course i tried pursuing shen qingqiu, but it ultimately backfired because suddenly he realized that he was in a dating visual novel?? and since i put myself as a guy, he just refused to show up to special in game events to avoid me interacting with him???

and obviously i was like "wtf why isn't he here?" when he didn't show up. then at some point i explored the area, and the screen suddenly zoomed in to show sqq talking to sqh (supposedly telling him all about the little situation). next thing i know, both of them are slowly turning their head to stare at the screen in pure and utter terror

also in some part of the dream, i think i did some liu qingge events or something and as his affection levels rose, he would continuously jump scare me by popping up out of nowhere and go, "its not like i like you or anything!!" while covered in blood and holding out a demonic beast head as if it were a box of treats

anyways, totally random question guys haha if i made an svsss visual novel dating sim would you guys play it. no reason in particular at all.

#im actually learning how to code right now #if i hyperfixate enough ill turn this to reality bc im kinda bad at writing fanfiction #no promises though #i prob had this dream bc i stayed up till 5 am last night playing a date with death #idk if dream liu qingge was accurate bc personally i see him more as just being like 'for you.' before leaving #but its a funny thought to have with liu qingge acting like that sporty emotionally constipated tsundere character lmao #anyways dw if i do make the game i would build a chaotic ass harem route jesus fucking christ that'd be hilarious #the scum villain's self saving system #svsss #mxtx svsss #shen qingqiu #shang qinghua #liu qingge #cumplane

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heynhay · 9 months

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I've done the math, there's no solution, we'll never last

#klance #voltron #vld #lance mcclain #keith kogane #EXTREMELY RARE INSTANCE OF HEYNHAY ACKNOWLEDGING VLD CANON???#But not lances altean marks bc ummm allura lives. In my world. Bc I am not an idiot.#haha well this is post-finale angst so. yeah #art #my art #SPONGEBOB HOLDING UP HANDS MEME. THIS IS NOT A BREAKUP POST #JUST LIKE. HURT/COMFORT. THEY WORK IT OUT.#keith is just being an emotionally constipated ass here for a sec ok hang on #laufey

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revenantghost · 6 months

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You know, I've read a lot of fics where Vash can say "I love you" to Wolfwood and Wolfwood can't, but what about the other way around?

A Vash that hasn't allowed himself that word in 150 years?

A Vash that doesn't know if he can even feel love?

A Vash that knows he doesn't deserve it, doesn't even want it?

(But oh, he does he does he does, he wants it more than anything.

And that's why he can never give it the power of a spoken word.)

#Trigun #Vashwood #I can't write a proper poem or fic but I am SUFFERING my guys #Had to say words #They are both emotionally constipated your honor #Now back to attempting to chill

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geraskierfanficprompts · 23 days

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Prompt 12

Geralt has a thing for biting. Jaskier has a thing for not looking like a mauling victim the day he performs at a very prestigious court. Geralt agrees he'll hold off on the biting for a few nights, so Jaskier is "presentable." But now he looks unclaimed. He looks like he has nobody that loves him and watches over him. Nobody that can bite him in the heat of passion. Geralt sucks it up and decides that he'll just have to come along to make sure nobody gets any ideas about doing anything to his bard. And so what if he spends most of the night staring longingly at Jaskier's neck like some kind of starved vampire? Who says you get to judge? *grumpy witcher noises*

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caelanglang · 1 year

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Aster.

“I believe in you, but I’m worried.”

Trust. Loyalty. Communication.

They really went from “you’re gonna die soon… I hate your type.” (Kanda to Allen, Chapter 8) to “I don’t want such fragile people anywhere near me!” (Allen to Kanda, Chapter 227). The tables have turned…..

#hoshino wrote them with sooo much care I’m #Kanda going out of his way to tell Allen “I said that I would ‘help you’.” (Chapter 231) is the reason why I am insane.#They give me so much life.#the evolution #the DEVELOPMENT IS INSANE #LIKE #TWO OF THE MOST EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED AND TRAUMATIZED CHARACTERS IN THE SERIES ACTUALLY SITTING DOWN TO TALK ABT IT AFTER 200+ CHAPTERS #yullen is my therapy I love them #the cracks in kanda’s seal tho ToT #yullen #arekan #dgm #d. gray man #d gray man #allen walker #kanda yuu #Yullen Flower Fes #Yullen Flower Fes 2k23 #I hope I get to finish all my wips within the time frame hnnngg #my art #flower language #me citing my brainrot in mla style bc I am so tempted to write a formal essay abt this series #my og my core reason my villain origin story #LETS MANIFEST THEM COMING BACK FOR THIS MONTH’S UPDATE LEZGOOOO #I love them so much

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lulu2992 · 6 months

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Another “old” drawing!

John has something very important to say, something he hasn’t told anyone in years (or maybe ever; he can’t remember). It’s a short, simple sentence, but also a surprisingly hard one to say, so before Taylor actually hears it, he wants to practice...

Full story and context under the cut :)

So, basically, at this point in Taylor’s story, life is hard.

Because of the truce that was negotiated between Eden’s Gate and the Resistance, Hope County is now living in relative peace, at least for the moment. But for the Deputy who made it possible, that peace comes at a heavy cost.

The same people who used to sing her praises and count on her to make things better now (understandably) feel betrayed, hurt, and are angry at her for sparing John, so they either awkwardly avoid her and talk behind her back, or are openly aggressive and contemptuous. Some shame her for “using her body to buy peace”, even though that’s not quite true (they aren’t there yet in their relationship, and the cult has rules anyway).

And despite the fact that, because of the circumstances, she’s now closer to Eden’s Gate than she is to the Resistance, not all cultists trust her. Of course, they listen to Joseph, who said he had faith in Taylor, but some still (also understandably) remain cautious and are worried for their Herald in the Holland Valley. Is it safe to welcome the Deputy or does that heathen have ulterior motives? What if she’s only trying to use and pervert John so she can more easily destroy him and the Project?

For peace, the Junior Deputy had to sacrifice her reputation, has lost many of her friends, and now feels judged by almost everyone in Hope County, even some of those who still tolerate her. So yeah, life is hard.

But paradoxically, the more upset people are at her for growing closer to John, the harder their hatred pushes her into his arms. Soon, the Baptist becomes one of the few people she really trusts and feels allowed to be vulnerable around.

That afternoon, after a particularly difficult moment in Fall’s End, she drove to Seed Ranch, resolutely walked through the front door without saying a word, barely acknowledging the few cultists on her way, went straight to John… and burst into tears the moment she put her arms around him. After the initial surprise, he signaled to the confused guards that everything was okay, that they could leave the room, and just hugged her back in silence.

“Everyone hates me,” she said when her sobbing quieted down and she was finally able to speak.

“No… No, not everyone,” he replied. “There are... There are people who love you. You know that, don’t you?”

She loosened her embrace to look at him.

“That’s why you came here, right?” he asked, smiling tenderly.

She smiled back, but soon she noticed he seemed… uncomfortable. Powerless, even; unsure of what to say and how to deal with the situation. Suddenly, she felt guilty... She had come here because she needed a shoulder to cry on, but she hadn’t realized her sadness would affect him too.

“Sorry,” she said, shaking her head. “I shouldn’t have come here and burdened you with that. I just- You probably have things to do, I should go...”

“No, wait!” he quickly responded, his hands tightening around her waist. “You can stay, it’s fine.”

She looked at him again, and he nodded before adding, “It’s fine. Really.”

She knew he wasn’t just offering her to spend the rest of the day at the ranch; he wanted her to, so she happily accepted.

That night, she fell asleep where she truly felt home: in John’s arms. Unbeknownst to her, for the first time, he told her something he knew he was ready to tell her, but not quite for her to hear yet; not before he was certain he could do it properly.

As she was peacefully sleeping, he whispered, “I love you.”

#my deputy #taylor rook #the deputy #john seed #john seed x deputy #my art #fan art #traditional art #digital coloring #drawn in december 2022 #only one ‘old’ drawing left!#story: 'that fic I’ll never write'#but wait... am I writing... fanfiction now??#the incredible adventures of john 'emotionally constipated perfectionist' seed #also considering what the fandom is reportedly dealing with these days... yay I can’t wait for this to be copy-pasted!#far cry 5

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adorabledrugl0rd · 9 months

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just try to calm down, Lee. Maybe call one of your brothers?

(I’m turning my emotional breakdown through her into plot development/ a character introduction. It’s how I cope)

#big sis leo #tmnt #2012 leo #transfem leo #she doesn’t know how to ask for help #specifically in English #I cope by making things. being sarcastic and dry humor #I AM EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED #>:(#don’t worry she’ll get all the nice things y’all sent too #why she cries

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ad-hawkeye · 1 month

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i fear we need your otome boy list

anon.............. here...... please feel free to psychoanalyze me based on this venn diagram....

#asks #anon #addy rambles #I NEED TO PLAY MORE GAMES I KNOOOOW BUT OUGHJHDLGLHD #hot spot is also the Crack Cocaine section. i am normal and can be trusted when they're emotionally constipated and pathetic. <3 #AND if they have long hair?! AWOOOOO #also ofc the requirement to be on my otome boy list is to Respect Women and Respect the Hell Out Of MC. REQUIREMENT.

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sensitiveheartless · 2 years

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Having a lot of emotions about Storm Bringer

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rubiatinctorum · 7 months

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i talk so much shit about wanting a vampire to drink my blood but if i knew one i don't think i could even ask. sweeping the elephant in the room so far under the rug no one can ever find it. "yeah blood is. cool and fine." meanwhile internally it'd be a chorus of DRINK MY FUCKING BLOOD OUT OH PLEASE DRINK MY FUCKING BLOOD OUT but that looks a little desperate doesnt it. what if its impolite. what if my blood just simply isn't up to their standard. what are we. it's best if i don't risk it

#rubia speaks #vampire #vampire posting #you see the imagined me in all of these vampire fantasies isn't so emotionally fucking constipated as i am #happy halloween season you have to put up with more stupid fucking posts from :3c me

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catdoingblep · 8 months

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Ok, it is around 1000 words of wesper carrying for each other (ft. Jesper being almost sensory overloaded, Wylan’s insecure thoughts and cold weather in Ketterdam)

Few months ago Wylan wouldn’t have believed if someone had told him that he will feel himself safe in the Crow Club. Few months ago he also wouldn’t have come to the Crow Club in a first place.

He was thinking that it's a dangerous place. He still was thinking that it's a dangerous place but somehow presence of Jesper in the club even with them being at the different sides of the room made Wylan felt himself safer than if he was upstairs in their room alone.

Safe enough to make calculations for Kaz’s new order in the middle of the club in the Barrel.

Maybe too safe as he did’t notice Kaz until Kaz’s cane touches his shoulder.

“Take him out”, cawed Kaz as Wylan looked at him.

“What?”

“Jesper. Take him out”, repeated Kaz. “Upstairs, outside, I don’t care. I don’t want him to do something that can scare the pigeons”.

Wylan looked for Jesper in the crowd to see him at the bar. He was sitting but Wylan could see how he’s constantly moving a bit, playing with his rings and earrings, touching his guns, staring somewhere off the side. There was a strange tension in his movements, and maybe all between them was still fragile and new but Wylan had already learnt what all these signs means.

That Jesper was unstable and tired, like his mind was exhausting itself. That soon all this restless energy would make him nervous, overwhelmed, irritated by every sound and touch, and then he would explode.

“Do I need to repeat again, Hendriks?”, said Kaz raising his eyebrow as like he didn’t understand why Wylan was still here.

Wylan shook his head, hiding papers with calculations in one of his vest’s pockets, and went to the bar, trying to avoid any contact with noisy and drunk club visitors.

Jesper even didn’t notice him with his restless mind too away from the club.

“Jes?”, called Wylan, touching his shoulder as light as he could.

Jesper flinched in surprise, smiling confusedly for a second, before he stretched his mouth into a slightly fake wide smile.

“Did you finish your work, sunshine?”, he asked with a hint of weariness in his voice.

“I think, I need some air”, lied Wylan. Jesper would never agree that he needs a break like no one ever taught him to take care of himself. If Wylan said that Jesper seems tired, he would try to distract Wylan with a joke or lie that he is completely fine. “Do you want to go outside?”

“Just to be sure no one will try to steal my gorgeous man”, smiled Jesper, jumping up from his barstool. Wylan felt himself starting to blush.

Jesper grabbed Wylan’s hand and headed up to the exit with tensed shoulders, maneuvering through the crowd, obviously trying not to touch anyone except Wylan accidentally.

Outside was relatively quiet as it was a time in between of very late night and very early morning. One of the lanterns in front of club was out again, making street a little bit darker than Wylan expected.

It also was cold and windy, and Wylan’s old jacket wasn’t doing anything with it properly. There was even a frost on the paving stones, and Wylan almost wanted to return back.

Almost, because outside Jesper was slowly relaxing like the relative calm of the night street was calming his nerves. It was worth a little freezing if you asked Wylan.

They was silent, and Wylan started to thinking about the project for Kaz again, and went too deep inside his mind because next thing he noticed was Jesper’s coat covering his shoulders.

“You are shivering”, said Jesper when Wylan looks at his face. He still looked tired but his voice sounded calmer.

“And what about you?”, asked Wylan trying to take the coat off while Jesper was trying to make him keep it on.

“And I will not wake up tomorrow with a cold”, reminded Jesper. “And if you return it, I won’t put it back - and we both will freeze”.

Wylan rolled his eyes but allowed Jesper to close few buttons. Jesper’s coat was obviously too long for him, but it was way more warmer than his jacket.

“Do you want to walk around?”, asked Wylan after few moments of silence.

“Walk around”, repeated Jesper with a shadow of amusement in his voice. “In the Barrel. At the late night. I don’t know if you noticed but we are not in the one of that fancy districts there people are walking around. You know, Barrel is a dangerous place”.

“I am pretty aware of it”, said Wylan with all the stiffness he could put in his voice, and Jesper laughed.

“Is it so, gorgeous?”, asked Jesper, and there was so much tenderness in his voice that Wylan felt himself lightheaded.

“But I will be with the best sharpshooter in the Barrel”, continued Wylan. “And you will be with the best demo expert in this city”.

“So you are the best in whole city, and I am just the best in the Barrel, so sad”, sighed Jesper feignedly.

“What can I do?”, smiled Wylan. “There is no one better than me”.

He knew that it is not true. There was the voice of his father in his head, saying “What do you think you are, Wylan? Like everything can overshadow that you are such an idiot”. But it was easy to pretend with Jesper. To act like he was really worth something. Like it didn’t matter who he is and what he can and cannot do. So easy to pretend that he was valuable, that someone as brilliant as Jesper Fahey could love him, that he could be… whoever and whatever Jesper was seeing in him.

Like he could be himself, be just Wylan, and it would be enough.

“No one better than you”, echoed Jesper so quietly that Wylan wasn’t sure he didn’t make it up.

He took the hand Jesper offered, and for a moment he was feeling himself maybe not the smartest like Kaz, not the bravest like Nina, not the worthiest like Inej but definitely the luckiest person in whole Kerch.

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glorious-spoon · 3 months

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sweet as it can be in fic when eddie nervously comes out to the whole team and gets showered in love and support, i honestly think if he WERE to come out, he'd do it by way of dating a guy and silently daring any of them to comment on it

#911 #eddie diaz #source: i am also an emotionally constipated bisexual and this is how i came out to like 3/4 of my friends

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osteichthyens · 6 days

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oc thing i drew a while ago.. featuring two of mine and two of @rhineposting's ocs hehee

#the elder scrolls #elder scrolls oc #how the hell am i even meant to tag this #i got a lot of oc art and that's basically why i spend long times without oosting anything #posting*#hmmmmhhm been thinking about posting more of that #anyway a dunmer an argonian a bosmer and a breton walk into a bar #the dunmer is emotionally constipated

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always-a-joyful-note · 2 months

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Actually, Zool was SUCH an important addition to this story just narrative-wise. In the last few parts we've basically seen the topic of change and endings tackled alongside the desire for eternity and sameness and how impossible it is for a human to fulfill those expectations. So here comes Zool, a group born out of a desire to destroy idols and expose their humanity in the ugliest way possible, made out of four people who have been deemed failures by society and/or their own selves. They were not a good group but they changed and became sincere in their pursuit of music. Their whole redemption is just basically a big flashing signpost that tells us that change can be good AND still co-exist with the desire to last, even if it turns out that they can't last.

#sorry i was reading about isumi scoffing at how kujo is the biggest failure of all (i am SO proud of him for that btw)...#....and i kinda lost it and made this incoherent overanalysis #because ARGH ITS SO GOOD YOU GUYS #this story is making me lose my MIND #if i had a nickel for every east asian media without an official translation that zapped my brain id have two nickels.....#idolish7 #fandom spamdom #note's notes #anyway the careful arrangement of the narrative....#yeah zool really did win me over with their narrative significance and unhinged emotionally constipated group dynamics

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