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alwaysshallow · 6 months

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― blood on my shirt, rose in my hand

SUMMARY: Simon Riley knows you have bad experiences with dating, but he also knows you don't really need no one but him. He's gonna provide you anything. So you can imagine how he could change, when for the first time, you think you've found the one man who's right for you. To your surprise, weird events happen during the time you date Nick. Thankfully, Simon's there to help you. (11,4k)

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A/N: this is SUCH a long piece, so some of it is here, but the full version is on AO3. i hope you're gonna forgive me for this one </3

"It's not like I'm ugly, right? I thought about it. If I'm ugly, so that's why it doesn't work out." you sip your favorite wine, looking right at your best friend, who has been listening for the past hour your ramblings about dating.

"You're fuckin' stupid, but not ugly, pet."

He's the best friend in the world – you can say this, meaning it with your whole heart. In fact, he's the best friend everyone probably wished to have, at least in your mind. Not only here for you, but loyal, you can tell him basically anything. He wouldn't say a thing, even if someone was nagging, and he was mostly a good adviser; all the qualities you looked for in a best friend, right?

And he was brutally honest, like right now, but you don't mind it. Simon Riley had this thing, and even if sometimes you were almost offended at his bluntness (like this one time, when he told you you're a crying mess and you act… worse than a toddler), you mostly appreciated it. Your other friends couldn't compare to his honesty, this man was not the one to lick your ass.

Or, so you thought.

"Excuse me?" you raise your eyebrow, laughing, while shaking your head. "You should, I don't know, tell me I'm amazing and they don't deserve me. Or so." you joke; it causes him to roll his eyes.

"That's what I told you. Different words, but the same thingy."

"Right."

It sometimes sucks for you that Simon isn't a girl. He has this unbelieveably annoying guy thing, where he just can't be delusional with you, and he can't just mourn over some hot guy. His way of thinking is… on the other level, he totally skips the mourn part, the part that is pathetic; he's just saying things like "move on" and "there's a lot of them anyway". Again, you love it, but you really wish you could cry about guy being so pretty that it hurts, without him rolling his eyes.

Yet, when you're more in mad mood than mourning one, his attiude is just perfect. He's the one to encourage you to scream, he even brought you a few times to rage room when you needed to smash a few things, not to mention the attiude he was setting you in. Powerful, not giving a shit about a "piece of a man that doesn't deserve you".

Simon sighs. "You're worryin' too much. Really that desperate?"

You huff, as you sink more into the plushy couch in your apartment. "I'm not desperate. It's just…" you take a few seconds to think "being love starved."

"Sex starved, you mean."

"Love starved." you send him a look.

"Mhm. You fancy plushies, hugs, and all shite like this?"

"You're so fucking British, it hurts" you laugh. "Yeah. Yeah, I want something like this. Someone to hold me, someone that cares about me and I know it. Sex comes in package, of course, but it's just… ugh, I want a man" you groaned.

You feel as pathetic as ever, when Simon doesn't respond – because how exactly should he? He wasn't vocal about things like this, he usually just nod his head, and there it was, another topic. A miracle it was that he was already listening to your date rambling, not cutting it off because he was uncomfortable or something.

Dreams about your love life… more girly conversation.

Mostly – you know guys who loved talking about it, obviously, and you adore it pretty much, especially when you can know their perspective on some things, but… Riley wasn't really one of them. He had "simple hookups" as he said one day, when you asked him about doing double-dates. It wasn't even an option, he just liked to ocassionally fuck and that's all.

So you stopped trying a few months ago for a double-date. Instead, you focused more on finding a man that would meet your expectations at least in the middle, and that was exhausting, to be honest. Tinder dates were just a disaster after disaster – if it wasn't some catfish, a guy that wanted to marry you and have kids after two weeks of writing, it was most definitely a guy with a desire to bang you quickly.

Romance was dead these days, you noticed. That wouldn't keep you away from trying to find someone, though. Patience was a key in things like these.

"Maybe you will set me up with one your friends? It wouldn't suck. You know them." you think out loud.

"Definitely too much wine f'you." Simon takes your glass, and pours all of the liquid to his mouth, swallowing it like it was some kind of juice, not alcohol. "You don't want a guy from military in your life. Trust me."

There's some sternness to his tone, at which you raise your eyebrow. It was just a funny comment from your side, nothing else – you know by the heart that this man doesn't like the idea of connecting his two worlds. "I know, Simon. Just joking, right?"

You place a hand on his. It's a comedic, yet, heartwarming view, when you see the size difference.

"And, you're pretty cool for a military guy."

He huffs. It seems like pretty cool offends him, but he doesn't say it out loud, so it can be only your imagination working. "You met me before I enlisted. 's different."

"How different?"

"You knew me before military."

He doesn't give you another answer that night, nor the continuation of this one – he brushes you off, like you are some kind of bug that is disturbing him, and brings up another topic, about his deployment. He asks if you can watch his apartment when he's gone, take care of it; it's stupid, Simon knows that you will always agree, but it's the need of asking you anyway.

And, he likes coming home, where he can smell your perfume, where he can see that you made some changes. You tend to do that a lot, mostly buying stuff to his apartment. "It looks worse than room in the hospital" you always say, when he cocks his eyebrow with amusement. He doesn't say that, but he finds it really adorable that you care so much, to make his space… cozier, even if he's not really attached to it. Mostly, it's for your comfort when you come to visit him, and that happens a lot; not like he minds it. Anyone else would be banned from his apartment, but you? Oh God, you wouldn't be, not in the milion years.

You could probably be the worst ever to him; call him names, punch, anything, and he would still be your Simon. It's what he was used to, to being by your side, no matter what time, no matter if you were in the good mood or not; your presence was everything to him.

Not like he'd ever confess that, but it is what you know, silently.

Yet, you are so good to him. Always sending him letters or texting him when he is on deployment. A couple of times, you sent him little things too, if he forgot something, photos included too, but new ones; mostly you captured views, but you were here once or twice. His happiness may not be that visible to outsiders, but his heart is full every time.

"My girl", he'd tell boys when they saw a polaroid of you, swiftly tucking it into his vest because no one was allowed to see it more than three seconds.

Often, Gaz joked if you are actually his girl even if you're not dating, but it sounded so bizzare to Ghost. How would you not be his? Thirteen years of friendship counted as something beyond being only his best friend, no? At least in his mind it was like this. He was used to you dating briefly other guys, but it lasted maybe a few months top. Nothing serious, probably his hookups were more meaningful than your relationships.

So you can easily imagine his confusion, when your mutual friends tell him big news about your new object of interest; someone that he doesn't even know yet, but he's not really his fan on the beggining.

It was just a month of being away.

His eyes are on you now; you are embarrassed, looking anywhere but at him. You don't even speak, you just wave your hand in dismissive manner, trying to change the topic because you don't really want to talk about it. Not in the presence of your best friend, at least.

It works for everyone but Simon, and you know it by the way he looks at you, processing what he just heard. Changing a topic, sudden talkativeness from your side is like buying time in that, time precious to think what to say to your best friend later on.

Because you know for the fact that he'll ask. He always does, and now he has a reason.

You have your reasons why you haven't told him. "It's nothing serious. That's why I didn't tell you." your voice is a little more silent than usual, but he can hear it anyway. You two are taking a walk to your apartment with no one around; and it's awkward one.

Simon seems like he doesn't want to say anything about your poor choice of men. It worries you; he always wanted somehow to make fun of you or make comment. Now, it's just a nod, like he gets it, but you know it's not it. He doesn't get it.

But you don't know what it is.

"C'mon!" you nudge him, and when it doesn't seem to affect him, you stand right in front of him. A little wobbly because of alcohol, your vision isn't so great too, but it makes him stop in his tracks. "Say something."

"Somethin'" he grumbles, and you can't help but roll your eyes. "What? Told me-"

"-I know what I told you!" you cup his face in your hands. Your head is a bit hazy, but the intensions are clear; making him talk and soft. It always works, so you have a lot of hope. "He's a good guy, but I want to meet him a bit closer to be… certain about him, you know? You've heard me whining about boys a bit too much."

"You can tell me everything." he muses, and you can't help but smile at that. Of course – of course you can tell him everything. You never doubted it for a second, and you think of yourself as stupid, doubting that he wouldn't want to hear about it. "Ill be the judge of that, though. Good guy thing."

"I can't be trusted?" you tease, and when he lets out a low chuckle, you grin even more. It's like a reward after him being his grumpy self.

"No." he shakes his head. "You don't know what is good for you. But that's why I'm here."

Under the influence of alcohol, you didn't pay too much of attention to his words; probably you wouldn't pay attention to it even if he'd say this when you are sober. Simon as your protector – it's so natural, you don't even need to think about it as something weird. It's just the way things are for thirteen years, everyone knows this.

Your friends, who were a bit reluctant on the beggining, but two parties later, when he joined the competition of drinking on time and wasn't drunk at all, he won over their hearts.

It was tougher with your parents, when you were in highschool. A little distanced at first, they constantly asked where were his parents (which, you told them, was rude asking, especially to his face), telling you how much of a bad news he could be for you. Suggestion of him ruining your future was the worst, you never thought of him this way; that discussion caused you to give them the silent treatment for a few days.

Apparently after that, suggesting that Simon is around you too much, clinging to your side and giving you "weird glances", they stopped the narrative, admitting that the boy might be damaged, but not broken. You still felt like they're judging their every move, but seeing that he had pretty good life plan, seeing that he thought about military and went here actually? Hell, they completely stopped being suspicious in any means.

Riley just had this thing of charming people, even if they didn't like him in the beggining. He had everything under his finger, trying to keep things under control – it was like that… pretty much since the beggining of his life. You met him when he was an adult, but he always liked to keep things under control; people, things that he cared about. What belonged to him was sacred, untouchable for anyone else.

The possessiveness started in his early childhood with toys, when he absolutely despised everyone who just wanted to touch his things, to lay their dirty, filthy fingers here. In early classes, it was considered just rude.

When he was older though, he started fighting for various things. Knowing he has the advantage, he used his legs, fists, when he had to, and no one was looking, besides the actual victim. He wasn't stupid; he knew how troublesome the public can be, he also knew the power of manipulation a bit too well to get caught so easily. Wasn't the plan, getting caught; it once happened, but because he wanted to; he even broke his own nose, making it like the other guy did it, just to get what he needed. The reputation of kid who was broken in the childhood, so he's just not opening on others was… suitable, for him. No one could suspect anything, especially when the kid just happened to be "attacked" by one of the popular ones, right?

The idea of power was something that Simon truly desired from the beggining; maybe it has something to do with the lack of his parents in his life, being transferred from one foster family to another. Maybe it's just him being a little fucked up – who knows.

What mattered, was the fact he had you. You, so sweet, so considerate to be by his side, to be protected by him, to be the person who "opened" because of her. Little did you know, he opened just because he wanted to be closer to you, not those fuckers you hang out with.

If you knew his past, you would have another reasons in mind, why he showed up to meet your potential new boyfriend. Jealousy, posessiveness, power complex, him being a control freak who can't give you to anyone he personally doesn't trust – if ever, considering you were his precious best friend. He isn't willing to share.

You aren't really aware of him being this crazy. You think of his flaws, and you see someone that has been damaged, someone that you can and will help, if he just asks for it – or if you'll see he needs it. So, naturally, you help, and grin the widest you can, when you see him in the door. He shows completely unexpected. It doesn't take you long to wrap your hands around his neck, tight, as you hug him.

Happy as always because you can see your friend, happy as ever because moments like these means a lot to you. When he's deployed, you can't even see him, so you're taking all in when he's right in front of you.

"Hope 'm not interruptin'." he murmurs into your hair, as his head is practically buried in them; he has to bend down a little to be at your level, but it's something he enjoys. The power.

"Never." you say immediately, not even hesitating in your statement. "Actually, you found a pretty good moment."

"That I did, eh?" his eyebrow arches, as he straightens up.

"As always. Nick's here, you have to meet him."

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#ghost x reader #simon riley #simon riley x reader #ghost x you #simon riley x you #ghost #ghost cod #simon riley x f!reader #cod x reader #simon riley imagine #simon riley smut #simon riley fluff #best friends to lovers #best friend simon riley

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highvern · 6 months

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Teach Me

or the first time we hooked up it was so disappointing I thought about faking my own death so you’d leave me alone

Pairing: Lee Dokyeom (Seokmin) x fem!reader

Genre: smut, humor, college au

Warnings: kind of virgin shaming, first time, OC knows she’s wrong but no one’s perfect, descriptions of bad sex, mentions of death (in a joking way), frat!svt, chemistry

Length: ~2.3k

Note: there used to be a time i had to memorize the entire greek alphabet bc i was a sorority girl so im drawing on my roots for inspo lol

Also virginity is a construct! don’t let people make you feel bad about it!

read more here

Friday Night Approx. 11:37PM, undisclosed bed room, SBT fraternity

Dokyeom is great. He’s funny, always does his share of your lab assignments, and when you go to parties at his frat he gives you the good shit out of the fridge instead of whatever concoction his brothers whipped up in the communal cooler for everyone else to drink. The fact that he’s easy on the eyes doesn’t hurt either.

That’s why the last ten minutes have surmounted into what has to be the most disappointing hookup of your life.

His fumbling hands and clumsy movements would be endearing if he wasn’t drooling on your neck in a way that is less than attractive. When his hand slides down the front of your jeans he’s at least receptive to the gentle corrections and cooed suggestions you provide. Is it mindblowing? No. Will he get you off? Probably not. But he’s enthusiastic so you’ll let it go for now.

“Can I, like,” he starts, leaning back to sit up right above you, face bright red, “take your pants off?”

“Ugh, yeah. Sure.”

It’s a weird escalation given you still have your shirt on but to each their own.

The heat of his muscular chest against the back of your thighs is pleasant enough but doesn’t make up for the way he dives straight in, immediately sucking and licking vigorously. Jolting nerves force you to curl in onto yourself at the discomfort, thankfully unlatching his lips from your abused clit. Twisting a fist in his hair, you pull him up and away from your crotch, distracting him with hot kisses and nips across his throat. He doesn’t seem to mind the change, teeth clenching as your opposite hand tickles down his front to his waistband. Stuffing your hand into his boxer, Dokyeom releases a noise somewhere between a whine and groan. Hot and heavy in your palm, his tip leaks obscenely when you give him a tug.

“Shiiiiit,” he whimpers against your mouth.

Well, at least one of you is having a good time.

In a flurry of motion, his pants are down just enough to get his cock out, allowing him to roll a condom on before pushing inside you slowly. The stretch isn’t painful but it’s less than comfortable as he starts to rock his hips. With an awkward rhythm he’s providing you little friction and thus no pleasure. You try tilting your hips to change the angle. It helps some, letting his pelvis grind gently against your clit but still no dice. Your fatal mistake is wrapping your legs around his waist to pull him deeper.

When you clench around him as he hits deeper, Dokyeom’s hips buck a little too enthusiastically, head falling back and belting long low groan. All you can do is gape as he finishes, leaving you in the dust.

Sunday Afternoon Approx 2:40 PM, coffee shop near campus

“He did what?”

“Don’t make me repeat it.” You grimace.

“Like, no warm up at all? Just straight P in V?”

“I mean he kissed me but other than that, not really, no.”

The look on Seungkwan’s face is that of a child realizing Santa isn’t real.

“And you’re sure it was Dokyeom? Like the Lee Dokyeom, your lab partner, my fraternity brother Lee Dokyeom?”

“I didn’t ask for his ID but yeah I’m pretty sure it was him.”

“What did he say after?”

The look you give tells him exactly what Dokyeom asked you after he finished.

“No!” Seungkwan gasps.

“Yes.”

You’ve abandoned your diluted iced coffee, pushing it to the middle of the table. There’s a gentle thud as your forehead meets the cool vinyl surface.

“What are you gonna do about your lab Tuesday?”

“Pray I get hit by a bus.” You grumble, not moving an inch.

“I’m being serious.”

“So am I! It’s that or drop the class.”

“It’s too late for you to drop.”

“Death it is.”

You can feel the eye roll Seungkwan responds with.

“Have you two talked at all since then?”

“He has, I haven’t.”

“What does that mean?”

“He’s texted but I haven’t responded.”

“Let me see!”

Prying your head away from the table, your phone is unlocked and snatched away by your best friend. He reads the messages with mild horror.

[SATURDAY 1:07 AM]

Lee Sock-mint: hope you got home okay :)

[SATURDAY 1:08 AM]

Lee Sock-mint: I had a lot of fun btw

[SATURDAY 2:07 PM]

Lee Sock-mint: you left your jacket at the party but i snagged it, i can give it back tuesday

[TODAY 9:14 AM]

Lee Sock-mint: wanna meet at the library tonight to go over this weeks lab?

“Oh sweetie…”

“I know!”

“Well, you fucked in this bed so now you have to lie in it.”

“You always know just what to say.”

“It’s a gift.” He shrugs.

“And it was Jihoon’s bed actually.”

“I take it back. You probably will die before Tuesday.”

You end up texting Dokyeom but only to tell him you’re already busy and you’ll see him on Tuesday. You feel bad for blowing him off but the disappointment from your tumble in the sheets still echoes in your head.

Tuesday Afternoon Approx 3:00 PM, Chem 326 Laboratory

When Tuesday comes, Dokyeom is suspiciously absent from class and you have to work on the lab with Soonyoung instead.

“Heard you’re ghosting my bro.”

It’s a statement, not a question and the look on Soonyoung’s usually cheerful face scares you a bit.

“Where’d you hear that?”

“You know, just hearing things.”

“I heard you cried Friday night about how much you love Eunha but she won’t give you the time of day.” You shrug your shoulders. “So maybe we’re both just hearing things.”

“Well I heard you popped his cherry and ditched him right after!”

“I did what?” You whisper yell, grabbing Soonyoung’s arm as your eyes go impossibly wide.

A few of the groups close to your table have turned around in curiosity but Soonyoung’s prone to random bouts of shouting so they’re interest fades quickly.

He has the decency to look ashamed of his outburst. You two are actually friends when it boils down to it but guy code has him siding with his best friend on this one.

“He said you basically ran out the door.”

“You know that’s not the part I’m questioning.”

“Wait, you didn’t know?” Soonyoung is shocked.

“No!” You shoot. “Do you think I’d deflower him at a gross frat party if I did?”

“Idiot.” He curses. “Sorry, not you. Well also you, but him mostly.”

“Why the fuck wouldn’t he tell me that?”

“Probably because he’s a junior and has barely even seen a girl naked?” He looks at you like you have two heads. “It’s a pride thing.”

“Yeah well his pride made him cum in two seconds.”

“Probably the two best seconds of his life.”

“You’re disgusting.”

“Can you just, I don’t know, like, talk to him? He thinks you hate him.”

“I don’t hate him.”

“Tell him that, not me.”

After class is dismissed, you trudge across campus to your dorm replaying the conversation over and over. You’re both mortified and pissed. How could you not tell you?

You open your messages to send him a long overdue text.

[TODAY 4:27 PM]

You: sorry I’ve been MIA :( wanna get dinner?

It’s cowardly but you’ve done worse.

[TODAY 4:48 PM]

Lee Sock-mint: sorry, busy

Like hell he is. Dokyeom brags every Tuesday that your lab is the only thing on his schedule, unlike your four morning lectures in addition to your shared class that packs your day.

[TODAY 4:49 PM]

You: we really need to talk

When your message goes unopened and unanswered for hours, you call in reinforcements.

“Are you home?”

“Well hello to you too.” Soonyoung greets sarcastically.

“Hi.” You deadpan rubbing your eyes, patience wearing thin. “Are you home?”

“Yes, what do you want?”

“Is he home?”

Silence.

“Come on Hosh, is he home?”

“Yeah but he hasn’t been out of his room all day.”

“I’m coming over.”

“What?”

“I need to talk to him!”

More silence.

“Fine but whatever the hell is going on, leave me out of it.”

“You’re the best.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.”

Tuesday Night Approx. 9:34PM, Soonyoung and Seokmin’s shared apartment

To say Dokyeom is shocked to find you gently knocking at his bedroom door on a Tuesday night, expression bashful and eyes filled to the brim with apologies, is an understatement. He knew Friday night didn’t give you the best impression but what could he do when the pretty girl from his chem lab he’s had a fat crush on all year let’s him fuck her after another one of his frat’s parties?

The entire night you flirted with him, pressing your ass into his crotch as the shitty trap music Chan insisted on playing buzzed on; wrapping your arms around his neck, letting your fingers comb through the short strands of hair at the back of his head. Then all of a sudden your kissing and next thing he knows you’re pulling him up the stairs and into the first empty bedroom you can find. It was a whirlwind.

“Hi,” you whisper, a little afraid he’s gonna slam the door in your face.

“Hi,” he whispers back, still in disbelief that you’re in front of him.

“Can we talk? Please?”

He doesn’t answer but steps aside to open his door wide enough for you to walk past him. Taking a seat on the corner of his bed like you usually do when you study at his apartment, your eyes look everywhere except him.

“I, ugh,” clearing your throat, you start again. “I’m sorry about Friday.”

Dokyeom doesn’t know what to say so he remains silent, firmly planted by his door.

“Soonyoung told me about how you hadn’t, and I just,” You’re rambling from the guilt coursing through your veins. “I’m really really sorry.”

When your words register, Dokyeom finds himself simmering somewhere between anger and annoyance.

“You feel bad because I was a virgin?” He scoffs. “I don’t need you to pity me.””

“I don’t!” You insist. “I just, if i knew it was your first time I wouldn’t hav–”

“Wouldn’t have what?” He ventures.

“Done it in some gross frat house.” You mutter.

“So you regret it?”

You think hard about your next words. Dokyeom is both your friend and your lab partner for the next two months. The latter is far less important to you now than it was this morning before Soonyoung spilled the beans.

“No.” Your voice is firm, “Okay, well maybe the fact that Jihoon is gonna kill us for doing it in his bed but no, I don’t regret it.”

“But you didn’t like it?”

“I liked…some of it.” You stutter.

“Oh.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Which parts?”

“Huh?”

“Which parts did you like?” Dokyeom rolls his eyes.

“Um, well, you’re a good kisser!” You assure.

“Is that all?”

“When you went down on me it was okay.” You wince.

“So basically everything besides kissing was bad.”

“No!” You lie but he’s pinned you in place with a glare. “You, uh, you have a lot of potential!”

It’s Dokyeom’s turn to wince. He shuffles across the room to sit next to you on the bed, leaving a sizable distance between your bodies.

“When Soonyoung told you I was a virgin, did he tell you I had never done any of that before?”

Now that’s shocking. Shocking because you’ve seen girls flirting with him before. At parties, in class, at the library coffee shop; hell even a few dudes approached him. Dokyeom is liked by pretty much everyone on campus, including your own friends who have tried to get you to introduce them.

“No, he didn’t really go into specifics.”

“Oh.”

The atmosphere is already awkward so what’s one more question?

“So how much have you done?”

“Well, after Friday…” Dokyeom trails off.

“Before Friday.” You clarify.

“Well I’ve made out obviously. And, I mean, a girl went down on me freshman year.”

“That’s it?”

“Did you come here to make fun of me?” Defensiveness rolls off him in waves.

“No, it’s just…surprising is all.”

When you look over at him you can see the question on the tip of his tongue.

“I’m just shocked you don’t have girls lining up because you’re like hot and nice and yeah.” You trail off, blush burning the tips of your ears.

“You think I’m hot?”

“Well I didn’t let you in my pants because I thought you were ugly!”

You both let out snorts of laughter.

“I’m sorry.” he apologizes.

“Why are you sorry?”

“I was just really excited to finally have a shot with you and I ended up looking like a complete loser.”

“Hey! That’s not fair,” you smirk. “I thought you were a loser before we hooked up.”

Dokyeom grabs for the pillow behind him, gently tossing it at you as a bark of laughter leaves his mouth.

“How ‘bout we just agree to move on?”

He does his best to suppress a crestfallen frown from bloom on his lips. Dokyeom tries to look at the positives of ignoring the fact that he’s seen you half naked, felt your mouth on his, how you feel spread on his fingers, spread on his cock; even if just for a short moment. As much as it would suck to never experience those things again, at least you’ll still be his friend. It also means you’ll forget that he’s a two pump chump. Bright side.

“Yeah.” He agrees, resolving himself. “Sounds good.”

After a beat of silence, you open your mouth again.

“You know, you’re the first virgin I’ve ever been with.”

“I thought we just agreed to forget about it?”

“No, we agreed to move on from being weird about it.”

“What’s the difference?”

“Well, since I took your virginity, I feel I have a… responsibility.”

“Responsibility?”

The sly smile twisting the corner of your mouth has Dokyeom choking on his own tongue. As you turn to face him fully, his breath catches in his throat.

“Yeah, what kind of friend would I be if I just let you be bad at sex and did nothing about it?”

Dokyeom can feel his pants tighten at your implication.

“Ugh, not a good one?”

“Exactly! I would be a bad friend if I didn't help you and I don’t want to be a bad friend.”

As you speak, you shift until you’re kneeling between his spread legs, maintain eye contact the entire time.

“Yeah that would be… bad.” His brain is working at half capacity due to your hands pushing up his thighs towards his zipper.

“So,” you blink slowly, smile shy with a subtle tilt of your head, “you’ll let me help you?”

Dokyeom feels himself nodding in agreement.

“Then let’s get started.”

#svthub #lee seokmin #lee seokmin x reader #svt x reader #seventeen fanfic #svt #dokyeom #seokmin x reader #seokmin smut #🫡 highvern #dokyeom x reader #dokyeom smut

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steddieas-shegoes · 19 days

Text

if you want to use me, i could be your puppet

for @subeddieweek day four with the prompt edging

rated e | 2,505 words | please check ao3 for tags

Day one: ao3 | tumblr Day two: ao3 | tumblr Day three: ao3 | tumblr

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Eddie didn’t think this through.

Running from Steve’s bedroom, naked, meant he would have to find a hiding place.

He did not want to have to deal with this right now.

He didn’t need Steve seeing the way Eddie’s feelings would no doubt show on his face, how he’d be quick to brush off Steve’s apology.

How quickly he’d agree to continuing what they’re doing so he had something rather than nothing at all.

The house was quiet, dark, a reminder of how lonely Steve probably was when he wasn’t busy with the kids or Robin or him. No wonder he was always so quick to jump in bed with Eddie; He wanted a warm body to keep him company.

“Eddie! Wait!” Steve’s voice came from the top of the stairs, but Eddie didn’t turn.

Maybe if he locked himself in the downstairs bathroom, Steve would give up and he could sneak out to his van wrapped in a towel or something. He’d done worse.

Unfortunately, Steve was much faster than him, probably due to the whole jock thing. Eddie had no chance.

Steve’s hand burned where it touched Eddie’s arm, trying to make him turn around and face him.

“Please, Eds. Please look at me. Let me-”

“I don’t want you to explain, Steve.” Eddie turned to him, suddenly angry. How dare he ruin what they were doing? How dare he take something that was so precious and send it careening off the road so quickly? “I want to pretend it never happened. I want to go back to letting you touch me and kiss me and hurt me just right. I want to know you don’t mean it.”

“Why?” Steve sounded angry. “Why would you want that? Is it that bad? What is it about me loving someone that makes them wanna run in any other fucking direction than to me?”

And Eddie wasn’t really prepared for that.

He didn’t really know exactly what happened with Nancy or any of the other girls Steve had been with in high school. He didn’t really know much about any of his casual hookups. He just knew that Steve gave so much to anyone he cared about, and many people took more than was fair of him to give.

“Why can’t I love you, Eddie?”

Eddie looked at Steve, really looked at him.

His eyes were watery, red-rimmed as if he was doing everything he could to resist letting the tears fall. Eddie could see his flush cheeks, his chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried to hold back a sob. His hands shook.

Eddie recognized this for what it actually was. Sure it was emotion, and maybe Steve felt it was genuine emotional turmoil.

But it was also the start of a panic attack, one that would quickly escalate to something Eddie wasn’t sure he could help Steve through.

“Steve, hey-”

“Don’t fuckin’ pacify me, man.” Steve’s breathing picked up and Eddie had to shut this down. “I can be upset.”

“Yes, you absolutely can. I’m not gonna tell you how to feel, but you definitely need to breathe, nice and slow.” Eddie put his hand on Steve’s bare chest, forgetting for a moment that they were both still naked, both still sweaty and sticky from everything they did in Steve’s bed.

“I am breathing.”

“You’re panting. You need to sit down.”

“I’m not sitting down-”

“Red.”

Steve froze.

Eddie immediately regretted saying it, hated that he was using this in a situation outside of their agreement.

He just needed Steve to stop and take care of himself for a second.

“That’s not fair,” Steve’s voice was shaky, unsure. He’d never heard it like that, not even when they first started this, not when they discussed the difficult things.

“It may not be fair, but neither is what you said.” Eddie looked behind him at the couch, the same couch Steve had held his hand while they talked about what they’d be into trying together. “Can we sit?”

“I dunno, are you gonna run again?” Steve crossed his arms over his chest, which would be a hilarious image any other time, but was currently just really sad.

“No. I’m not gonna leave.”

“Yet.”

“Yet,” Eddie agreed.

They both sat down on the couch, shifting until there was enough distance not to touch, facing each other.

Steve threw the blanket over their laps to at least make an attempt at being serious.

“I’m sorry I said it like that.” Steve sighed as he put his head back against the couch. At least he seemed to be holding himself together better now. Maybe Eddie could have a turn at a breakdown. “I shouldn’t have said it when we were still…”

“You shouldn’t have said it at all, Steve.” Eddie watched as Steve ground his teeth together. “I know you may think that’s what you’re feeling, but you were on a sex high.”

“I can see why you’d think that,” Steve sounded like he was doing his best to stay calm. “That’s why I shouldn’t have said it then. But I did mean it. That hasn’t changed and it won’t change.”

“Steve, be serious.”

“I am! I need you to be serious! I love you. I’ve loved you for long enough to know that’s what it is.” Steve turned his head and gave him a sad smile. “I know it wasn’t supposed to happen, and I know you don’t feel the same, but I’m glad I said it, even if it wasn’t how I planned to.”

Eddie had to remind himself to breathe as Steve’s words sank into his brain, consumed his chest and stomach, made the nerves in his body spark with a combination of hope and fear.

“How long?” Eddie squeaked out.

“You remember that night when we talked about our limits?” Steve grinned.

“That was…so long ago. What the hell?” Eddie slapped Steve’s knee, but didn’t pull it away fast enough. Steve’s hand grabbed his. “We’ve been around each other almost every day since then.”

“And I thought about it every day,” Steve admitted. “I was gonna ask you on a date first and make it a big romantic thing. I had a plan.”

“Steve, I-” Eddie shook his head. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to say these things to me to keep me around. I mean, it’s not like anyone’s lining up at my door. I wouldn’t trust anyone the way I trust you with all this. I kinda figured you’d be the one to call it off soon.”

Steve moved the blanket for a moment, tugged Eddie into his lap, and tilted his head to the side.

“I’m not going anywhere, Eds. You’ve got me and I’ve got you.”

How did he do that? How did he sound so sincere, so charming, after such an emotional admission?

“You’ve got me?”

“I’ve got you,” Steve surged forward, lips crashing against Eddie’s as his hands left bruises on his hips.

Eddie would be an idiot to let him go.

He would have to trust that Steve meant it, and he’d have to trust that his heart would be safe in Steve’s hands.

He already trusted him with everything else.

The blanket that had barely been around his waist slipped, half pooling on the couch next to them and half falling to the floor.

Steve pulled away, breathless.

“Will you?” He asked.

Eddie had no idea what he was actually asking. “Will I…?”

“Go on a date with me.”

“Yeah, Stevie. I’ll go on a date with you. You’re buying, though,” Eddie winked.

“Of course,” Steve nodded, leaning up to peck him on the lips. “I was thinking about a road trip. Heard there’s a new record shop opening in Bloomington if you wanted to check it out.”

“Fuck, you really do love me, don’t you? You know I could spend hours in there, right?” Eddie’s heart couldn’t handle the soft look in Steve’s eyes.

“Yeah, I’ll bring a cooler with drinks and snacks. It’ll be fun,” Steve shrugged.

Eddie inched back the tiniest bit and was suddenly reminded that they were very naked. And Steve was getting hard again.

“You know…this house is kinda quiet. Maybe we could…”

“Oh, you wanna be loud?” Steve raised his brow. “Hm. I guess I should give you a reason to be.”

The tone was different, not quite his usual teasing demand, but something that left Eddie wanting.

“Please. God, Steve, I need it, need you,” Eddie had no idea where this begging came from, or why he suddenly felt like he would die without Steve’s hands on him.

“I know what you need, baby,” Steve kissed his jaw, soft for what Eddie knew was coming. “But I need you to tell me your color first.”

“Green, so green.”

“Hey.” There was the demanding tone. “Look at me.”

Eddie had no choice but to look.

“I need you to think about it. Don’t think about how desperate you are. Are you okay with everything we talked about? Are you okay with me loving you?”

Eddie thought about it. Was he actually okay with their short conversation, the feelings Steve admitted to, what that would mean going forward for them? Or was he desperate in more ways than one?

No, no he definitely was okay with this. He’d been so worried that his feelings would never be returned, that he’d be in an endless loop of unrequited love, that he’d do what Steve did and let it slip while he was in space.

Having the guy he loved love him back was a best case scenario for him.

“Green.”

Steve’s lips were back on his, hungry, rough, almost more than Eddie was prepared for, but it wasn’t unwelcome. He sunk into the feeling, let himself drift into Steve physically so he could carry him away mentally.

“Wanna get my fingers in you. Think you can handle just spit?” Steve said as he nipped at Eddie’s neck, leaving red, leaving teeth marks. Eddie wished they could be permanent. Maybe he’d get them tattooed.

“Mhm, please,” Eddie nodded, ignoring the tiny part of his brain that was telling him to be responsible and get the lube. He’d be sore if they didn’t.

The louder part of his brain didn’t care about that, wanted to be sore. He could feel good now and deal with the limp tomorrow.

Steve’s fingers ghosted over Eddie’s lips, pressing down until his mouth opened. He sucked them in, three of them, moaning around them as he made sure they were slick enough to get inside with little resistance.

They were both impatient.

Steve pulled his fingers from Eddie’s mouth only a few seconds later, gently patting his cheek with his other hand when he whined at the loss.

“You’ll have me inside you again, baby.”

Steve didn’t waste another second.

His wet fingers rubbed against Eddie’s entrance, fingertips teasing along his rim and just barely pushing inside one at a time.

It was too much, not nearly enough, and almost exactly what Eddie needed all at once.

He was so close already, teetering on the edge of coming without a hand on him or fingers actually inside him, and it would probably be embarrassing if Eddie could think about a single thing that wasn’t the way heat was pooling in his stomach and chest.

“Close,” Eddie whimpered, bucking up against nothing as if that was even necessary.

Steve’s hands were gone. Just like that. No warning at all.

Eddie whimpered again, reaching his hands out to touch, to beg, to do whatever would get Steve’s hands back on him and finish the job he started.

“No, baby,” Steve said, shaking his head. “Not yet.”

And so it went.

Steve got a finger inside him, barely thrusting it in and out before removing it completely when Eddie would start rocking back into the touch.

Then there were two fingers, and Eddie could just barely feel the pressure against his prostate, begging for more or less or something that would be different from the current hanging by a thread he was doing.

He could feel himself drifting, knew he was mentally checking out from what was happening, but he could still hear Steve’s rough voice soothing him, guiding him.

Three fingers pressed inside him, slower than before, stretching him in a way he never could himself.

He felt full, used.

“Color, sweet boy,” Steve said from somewhere in front of him. Eddie was having trouble centering himself, couldn’t quite figure out where he was physically even though he knew he was with Steve.

The fingers inside him stilled, not working him open further or pushing and pulling until Eddie was naturally rocking back and forth.

Steve needed an answer. Eddie had to give him one.

“Green.”

“Good boy,” Steve praised.

Eddie pretended that didn’t make his heart flip-flop in his chest, but something must have given him away anyway. Steve was grinning at him knowingly, though he didn’t say anything.

“You’re gonna come when I tell you, right? Not a second earlier than that.”

At this point, Eddie was pretty sure Steve was in complete control of his body. He was simply the puppet on Steve’s strings.

“Answer me, Eddie.” Steve pushed against his prostate, making his body shiver and cock twitch.

“Only when you say,” Eddie gasped out, lifting his hips to pull away from the overstimulation, but immediately falling back down when he missed it. “Wanna be good for you.”

Steve groaned, and his fingers pushed in and out of Eddie faster.

He wanted to be good, but he was only human.

“St-” Eddie moaned. “-eve. Can’t-”

“‘S okay, baby. You can come now.”

And Eddie did.

Just like that.

The relief of finally being able to unclench his thighs, to actually feel the last string tethering him to earth snap as his release painted Steve’s stomach.

His fingers slowed, but didn’t leave him, keeping him stretched as he clenched around them during the waves of pleasure still wringing through him. He felt like he’d never stop feeling this deep pulsing, had to try to open his eyes to see if he was still coming somehow.

Steve was murmuring something against his hair.

When had he even fallen against Steve’s chest, face buried in his neck?

How long had he been just whimpering against him like a dog in heat?

“...So good for me, sweet boy. So proud of you for waiting for permission.”

Oh.

Praise like that wasn’t exactly a new part of their aftercare, but it was rare that Steve said it more than once or twice, usually just holding him in his arms in silence while Eddie came back down from the clouds.

He’d think about that later.

For now, he let his body relax, the noises stop, and his breathing slow.

He could sleep in Steve’s arms, feel the love pouring from his words and fingertips, and plant his feet on the ground in the morning.

Day five: ao3 | tumblr

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #sub eddie week #sub eddie munson #dom steve harrington

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comfortless · 2 months

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He definitely has a complex about being considered middle aged. Me personally, I see him as one of those guys that tell you they're a couple of years younger than they actually are, in the beginning, cause be feels too old for someone younger and (in his mind) 'cooler' than him.

I feel like joining the army at such a young age must've made him feel like an adult way too soon, and maybe back then he must've felt superior like 'All the people my age only care about love and having fun, I'm way too mature for those silly things'. (Could be a copping mechanism to deal with the fact that he wasn't getting love anyway, and wasn't included in all the fun his peers were having. Rejecting those things altogether are a way to take back control and make himself feel better, he's too busy becoming a real man anyway). But now that he's older he does feel like he missed out on things, and regrets not being a silly teenager when it was acceptable and expected at that age.

He makes me think of that one Yves Olade quote that goes like "I thought so many things & never said a single one aloud. I choked on such longing I couldn’t spit out. Yes, desire is so different when God bore you hungry. I could have devoured anything and still have been starving." When you get no love from your parents is one thing (still hurts) but when you get cast out in other social circles also, it makes you feel bitter like nothing else on this earth. It creates this feeling that you're the one that it's being inadequate for even daring to want connections to other people and you begin to resent people and yourself for wanting to be around them. There's this shame that settles on top of your chest when you want love but you feel like that's the cause of all your suffering in the first place, like you're doing it to yourself. This reminds me of another quote : "in front of my mother and my sisters, i pretend love is cheap and vulgar. i act like it's a sin- i pretend that love is for women on a dark path. but at night i dream of a love so heavy it makes my spine throb- i dream up a lover who makes love like he is separating salt from water." (Salma Deera, "salt"). I feel like this might apply to younger Konig, when convinced himself that love is for weak man to protect his poor heart. But now that he's older and has the money, the position and the body of a real man he needs to get a taste (just a small one, just once) of what he had missed out on in his youth. He finally feels deserving enough to attempt to have real intimacy with someone, not just quick hookups that leave him more hungry.

FEEL FREE TO NOT ANSWER THIS I'm just in a silly mood and had to psychoanalyse my babygirl real quick. Also, sorry for my English =))

how could i possibly just leave this in my inbox, anon?! this is all so correct…

thank god he wears that hood, because even on the field the sun isn’t hitting him too much - (he thinks) he can pass for early thirties. not that any lady who takes an interest in him is really considering his age much anyway, it’s always the shy “how tall did you say you were, again?”s or “what is your real name?”s that are telltale signs of interest. they ogle his build, the accomplishments he will prattle on about given the chance, the haunted look in his eyes and the strange lilt to his voice, the scars and lines only make him look cooler. if only that wasn’t such a rare treat.

he’s just in his head about things always. he missed out on the sweet, awkward dates: the mutual rush of adrenaline from holding someone’s hand for the first time, sneaky pecks in the schoolyard, passing notes and calling throughout the night. he never got to experience having his parents drop him off at the theater to take some girl from class out or… hell, even getting to go with a friend who wasn’t gossiping behind his back. König’s never gotten to live like any other, normal person, he’s been denied that since being birthed into a world that did not want him as much as he did not want it.

so, of course he’s bitter. he’s horribly bitter even now when things have finally started to fall into place for him. he’s got a stature even Adonis would be nervous around, a savings account so stocked he isn’t even sure what to do with the money, an impressive title, his own place, a car, and some of the soldiers even consider him a friend. he gets invited out every now and then, doesn’t mind downing jäger and listening to his men talk about their current affairs: what women they’re seeing, or how their children are, where they plan to go on leave. he takes to living vicariously through them. he even finds it fit to lie, pulls up a picture of some random woman every now and then to boast about how he made her come undone on his bed last leave with a stupid laugh. the truth is that no, last leave he bought a nice fleshlight, took a thirteen hour depression nap, maybe went on a long hike and had a film marathon on his own.

having a woman show him any interest immediately activates some self-destructive behavior: he’ll hound her (screw double texting, it’s moreso in the dozens. little “miss you”s and stupid accusations he immediately wishes he hadn’t sent), either withdraw into himself if he even feels slightly abandoned or become even more intense and clingy. no one’s ever loved him, not properly, so how is he supposed to know how? if his own parents hated him, then who is going to have the patience and understanding to teach him? his approaches are almost childish, the way he goes from boyish and giddy to closed off and pitiful. /: and the self-loathing only amplifies during these times, because my god he should be more disciplined than this by now. all that being said, i do think he would settle and be as well-behaved as a neglected bull could be if he feels his affection is being reciprocated. he just needs time (and a good therapist).

squealing at the poetry and how much thought you’ve put into this message. <3

Yves Olade is sooo good to quote from for him! i think that “You can have my heart if you have the stomach to take it. Kiss me hard enough to invert me.” suits him just as well, especially when it comes to the trepidation and fear amidst the sparks of him finally, truly having someone be selfless and loving with him.

König in love is a very special topic to me!! there are so many different ways this rabid dog could take to handling it and by and by he always seems to choose the most aggressive / uncanny approach, held back by a leash that no one’s ever thought to untie, constantly growling and leaping at anything that gets too close just to simmer down to whimpering and begging the second he’s pet just once!!

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robberskisses · 3 months

Text

The boy next door pt 2

Part one

cw: matty healy x reader, mentions of drinking, smut.

note: idk how I wrote so much for just one tiny part, not proofread as I want to get these parts posted and I’m tired :,)

As your alarm clock rings, wind gushes your hair into your face, reaching to move it out of the way you start batting your eyelids, as you suddenly remember everything. You spin your head to face the other way. He isn’t there. Just the window wide open, making your room all cold and you start to feel frustrated. You knew your imagination could run wild, but this? He had to have been here last night. You know it was real, you felt it. You spring up feeling deaf with silence, taking a glance out of the window; Matty’s window was closed along with his curtains too. In this state you had no other choice but to get ready, and you did quickly.

Creeping downstairs once again, you grab to trail your bike out when you decide to quickly take a peek if Matty has left yet, you know the part where he brought you home wasn’t a dream, and he did say he felt bad about you riding to school. Surely if he had slept in your bed he would remember the offer on at least one day. Peeking through the shutters of the window you feel a sense of relief. Leaning onto his van, smoking a fag, he stood right infront of your house.

“Hey” you say stepping out of your door, in your best efforts to sound chill about what could or could not have happened. He looks up abruptly from his cig he was attempting to relight, “y/n im so sorry” he motions his hands out towards you, “leaving your window open, I had no way to close it when I climbed back through this morning, I”. So it was real. The boy next door had stayed over, told you that you were beautiful, and the worst part is you were the one to kiss him. But maybe the best part was how calm he was about it all, how he only cared about leaving the window open.

“That’s okay,I didn’t even notice”, you lie, “the temperature isn’t all too bad out here in spring” you add as you walk to the van door. He lets out a sigh of relief whilst trying to take an extra step forward to open the door for you, “I was scared about you getting cold or sick that’s all”. You hide the way your blushing by looking out of the window when he gets in. “Your words got to me” you look his way, “I’d really like to come tonight, if that’s okay with you”. “That’s cool” he responds with a smile. Something in your heart hurts a little when this was such a big thing to you, part of you hoped you weren’t just another one of his side hookups, and the moment you got to school he would just go quiet on you.

Feeling nervous as the pair of you arrive at school, you peer over at him wondering if he wants you to get out first and clear off before he gets out. “What?” He glares back at you. “Have I got something on my face” he says whilst going up to grab the font mirror, smushing his lips around to check his teeth. “No sorry, no I was just wondering if we were getting out” you interrupt his face scan. Looking your way with a sense of relief he rolls his eyes sarcastically, “ahhh are you getting used to me opening so many doors for you, wait a minute i’l be around in a sec princess”, he laughs, you do too, feeling the usual flush you do around him. Hurrying around and opening the door for you, hopping out you look around for the girls you made friends with yesterday. “Leaving me so soon?” Matty says whilst getting a pack out of his bag. “Well I can’t exactly waltz into the boys school can I?” You respond. “You wouldn’t pretend to be a boy just to spend more time with me, hmm maybe we aren’t as good of neighbours as I thought we were” he says sarcastically, patting the top of your hair lightly, “See ya later”. “Bye matty” you reply. Should I tell them everything or should I keep quiet, you think to yourself, whilst you want to tell your new friends every last detail and reminisce out loud on what had just happened last night, you are also aware of two things. Firstly, they all are obsessed with him, and you don’t want to loose your first group of friends through jealousy or coming across as a slut. You are aware of how dramatic you sound, and second, yesterday you spent the entire day rattling off how much you hated him, you are going to sound crazy.

You spot the girls sitting on the steps that enter the girls school as they sip on their morning milk. “Umm did we just see you get out of you know who’s car” Lacey says questioning you, the group of them all peer your way like knives. “I did, it was so weird he just randomly offered a lift, we basically sat in silence like the whole time though” you respond. Meagan tilts her head in confusing “Him offering a lift.. unheard of, he must be in the best mood of his life”. You laugh nervously, “he did mention he has a gig tonight though, somewhere called volume bar?” You add trying to build your story. The girls begin to bustle excitedly, “y/n you better be joining us” Lacey says, “He probably picked you up to promote it” Liliya says giggling, “We usually hear about these things weeks in advance, must be last minute”. “Haha probably” you lie, “Il definitely be there though”.

Spending the next two hours planning your outfits, you learn how obsessed the teenage girl is with the teenage boy. Being isolated in your small town from them really held you back from an entire life of addiction. They assessed boys like assignments, knowing what they liked and what they didn’t, the patterns in their behaviour, how to impress them and get their attention. The one thing that confused you though, was how little they really knew about Matty. They grew up alongside him, yet viewed him as the cold hearted, rouge boy you thought of him to be, knowing him for a day. Strange, strange, strange you thought to yourself.

As the day grew closer to an end and the girls whispered to other classmates about the gig and helped you with what you should wear, Liliya suggesting you would apparently suit curled hair more than anything, the moment the boys came into mass, silence finally calms your ears. Finding his seat you see Matty, he ever so slightly smiles your way. “Did you see that y/n, did you actually just see that” Meagan says in a panicked tone. The girls all glance your way around you. “Yea I saw he just smiled at you” You lie. She starts going on how she knows he’s always had a thing for her. Being scared Matty was using you, and embarrassed of being around you, you have no idea why you are the one hiding whatever the pair of you have going on.

“Y/n you should totally ask Matty some questions about Meagan on the ride home. “Oh my god please you’d be the bestest friend ever if you did” she exclaims, hugging you. “Don’t make it too obvious though”. You nod wandering over to Matty’s van once again. For some reason, all of the girls talk about Matty today makes you more excited than you ever have been to see him, to spend time with him.

“Hey” you say as you arrive to them loading the vehicle up with instruments. “I don’t think there’s enough space in here for another person, your gonna have to rely on a ride home from George I’m afraid” Matty tells you trying to roll a drum in. You glance at his friend George, half smiling. “Hi” he says more out of it than you’ve ever seen a person. “If it’s too much trouble I can just walk, it’s okay” you say trying to avoid an awkward fifteen minutes. He turns around proudly after successfully getting the final piece of kit in, “don’t worry he’s going the same way”. “Don’t worry il still be able to get you tonight, and open the door for you” he winks. You giggle at home whilst trying to stay cool in-front of the band you’d heard so much about, “Just please don’t make it too obvious your there to pick me up” you whisper to Matty before stepping over to George’s car. Getting in at least it isn’t just you in the car, two other boys sit in the back flicking through sheets of paper, discussing which songs they should play tonight. Music you’d never heard on is quietly coming from the radio, that seemed broken as every few beats would have a scratching noise.“So friends with Matty then” George asks while tapping the ash from the bottom of his fag out of the window. “Uhh yeah.. he’s my neighbour didn’t he mention” you reply to him. “That boys got a million things going on” George says. You don’t reply at the puzzle his answer gives you. You pray it doesn’t really mean that boy brings home a new girl every weekend, so many even his best friend can’t keep up.

Arriving at home, you rehearse the lie you’d been coming up with the whole way home one final time in your head. Your new friend Liliya has invited you over for a meal and board games with her family, as their grandparents and cousins are coming over. You could get a lift both there and back and you’d be home around 11pm. Seems innocent enough and equally as important. “No!” Your parents say in unison. “What, what do you mean no?” You say frantically, beginning to get stressed. “Now that’s just silly waltzing in on a family’s special night” your mother says, “come on you can’t say that she says her friends always come around for those meals, you don’t want me to be left out do you” you add to her stupidity. “That’s the thing, we don’t know any of them, go next time when we get a chance to meet all of these people” your father tells you demandingly. “Come o-“ you get interrupted, “now I don’t know where you’ve learned that tone from but if you think that’s getting you anywhere you aren’t so bright” your mother says sternly, almost shewing you away.

Slamming the door of your room you don’t feel as life is fair, how is it that you’ve spent the first seventeen years of your life trapped from what real girlhood is like, and boys, and music, and a chance at living for something more than religion and family. You stress at how much this means to you. An idea spawns, scanning the room for something heavy, but not glass breaking heavy you pick up a little white ping pong ball. Quickly getting ready and curling your hair, just like you had been advised to. You slip into your black mini shirt and a denim skirt you had loaned from your cousin last year when you went on vacation with them. Putting on slightly more makeup than usual you swing the window open, throwing the little ball at Matty’s, praying that he was in there. To your delight his window opens, “I was just about to go outside to wait for you” he spectates. “Matty quiet down, please” you say, he tilts his head in slight confusion. “I made up a silly little lie and they wouldn’t even let me go out for that” you tell him. “Oh.. right we” you cut him off, still whispering, “The ladders, let me sneak through please”. His face brightens like you had just invented the cure for everything. Placing the silver ladders between your rooms he grabs on tightly, “careful, please”, you begin to climb up. “Tell me your going to be careful y/n”, you look up abruptly, he’d never used that tone with you, “okay, il be careful Matty”. Carefully crawling between rooms, Matty grabs onto your waist when you are closest to him, carrying you into his room. You both do that thing again, the not so awkward stare. You notice in all of that brown, there’s a little golden yellowy colour in his eyes, so hidden you’d have to go so close to see it. “Almost give me a heart attack there” he softly laughs. “Oh so it’s okay for you to do that but not me”, you speak in the same quiet tone, burrowing one of your brows. Looking down at you still he’s quiet too, “you know that’s not what I meant”. “MATTY!” George screams. “Hurry up NOW”. “Ups I forgot I had people waiting”, Matty awkwardly pulls a face. Hurrying downstairs you pinch the bottom of your skirt making sure it stays in place. “What I thought you were his neighbour not his roommate” George says in a misty tone. Matty pushes his cap into his face, blinding him as he collapses into a wall. “Im not waiting any longer” the mousy hair one adds, going through the front door. “That’s Adam, and behind me’s Ross” Matty tells you, “I doubt they had the courtesy or social awareness to introduce themselves” Matty says shaking his head at Ross. “Hi, Hello” you say to each of them spinning your head around to the back seats. The pair of them shooting tiny waves. “How’s it fair the three of us are squeezed back here” Ross says looking at Matty. “It’s called kindness and decency Ross” he responds, “and since when did you ever posses either of those traits” Ross says while they all laugh.

Arriving at the bar, you see your friends waiting outside, you wave at them slowly pausing as you see their faces drop. You walk over with the boys trailing behind. The girls all greet them, telling Matty how excited they are to see them play. Matty tells them that they need to go get things ready, and they go inside. “Vip entrance much” Lacey says. “Right, like where was my invite to pull up with the band” Megan adds. “Live next door to one of them, I guess” you try to sound unsuspicious. As the girls get drinks, you spot the boys coming out. Meagan grabs your hand and pushes through the small crowd opposite the barfront. The four of you find yourselves up front, despite the angry murmur from the girls around you. Standing tall above you Matty’s palm wraps around the mic, despite all your self talk about how much you knew him you didn’t even think about which role he had in the band. The singer. You felt selfish and mean for not taking more interest. “Hi, I’m Matty, this is the band, we’re called drive like I do, and you better like our stuff”. Adam starts playing a low chord, and slowly everyone joins in. A few girls around you sing a few of the lyrics, the song was good but part of you was shocked they were as big to have people know their songs yet. “Slow down, yeah I want you” Matty sings softly into the mic, looking down at you with that same Matty smile on his face. “Yeah she’s doing it all the time” Matty finishes the song with George joining in loudly, everyone cheers for them. “That ones called You… or something” Matty backs up ready to play the next song.

Dancing with your friends, and admiring Matty’s music felt blissful. Drinking for the first time and being gifted a little silver cross necklace by your friend Liliya, because it would “suit you soooo well”, is what being a teenage girl is. Feeling happier than ever you and the girls cheer and clap in unison as the band wraps up, exiting the stage. After a little while the boys join you around the bar, “You drink?” Matty asks you, “Apparently now I do” you respond, “Il get you something if you like”, Matty says after asking for a vodka coke. You spot Meagan side eyeing Lacey. “That’s okay” you respond. Looking down at George’s watch as his arm is spewed across the bar counter, you spot the time. You start to get nervous as it’s getting late, and in the chances that your parents did catch you, you could at least be home for curfew. Watching Matty finish his drink you whisper in his ear, “Do you know when we are leaving, I’m getting a little nervous and I”, “Well I’m gonna call it a night” Matty announces to the group. “So soon?” Both George and Meagan say, as George turns around and pulls a face at her, as if he said it first. “Sorry lads, promised the family I’d be home early” Matty responds, George clearly not buying it speaks “and since when do you follow”, being cut off by Matty shushing his lips. You wave goodbye to your friends and Liliya gives you a hug. Matty makes you wait at the door for a second, “just need to get the van from around back, don’t go anywhere, I mean it don’t leave”. The sweet unseen side of Matty was everything to you, but the protective, sort of controlling part to him, something you’d never felt by anyone close to you, was the cherry on top. Tonight, something felt different.

#matty healy fanfiction #the 1975 #matty healy #smut #matty healy smut

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welcometomyworldbabes · 1 year

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i'm sorry ~ part III

background: You’ve been friends with Shawn, as well as Cory, since your best friend Topanga introduced you to them. You immediately hit it off, and the four of you have been friends ever since. But recently, you’ve realized that you might have feelings for Shawn.

pronouns used: she/her

warning: none

author’s note: i know it took me a while but here is part III. this isn’t really edited, i wanted to get this out as soon as possible. unlike the other 2 parts, this part is entirely in your p.o.v. if you haven’t already, please read part one and part two so you’re caught up! there will be a part IV, so stay tuned and enjoy!

“Y/N! Shawn’s at the door for you!”

I didn’t want to see him let alone talk to him. But I also didn’t want to talk to my parents about why I didn’t want to.

“Can you tell him to come up here?”

“Hey…”

“Hey.”

“You know, I didn’t actually think that you’d want to talk to me,” he laughed.

I looked down as I answered. “I didn’t...”

He sighs as he says, “Look, I’m real sorry Y/N/N–”

“Alright.”

He steps closer to me. “I mean it. I-I shouldn’t have left you alone-”

“Is that why you think I’m mad at you?”

“Well, that and…” He stuffed his hands in his pockets and mumbled, “...not looking for you.”

“...Okay.”

“That’s it? Okay?”

“What do you want me to say?”

He ran his hands through his hair. “C’mon Y/N…”

“No, seriously, how did you expect this to go?” I started. “What you did wasn’t an accident: it was a choice. It was your choice to ask me instead of the girl you actually wanted to be with. It was your choice to leave me without saying anything. And it was your choice to spend the night with the girl you wanted to go with.”

He’s visibly nervous. His hands are deep in his pockets, he’s rocking back and forth, and he’s staring at the ground. I wonder if he can feel my eyes on him. A part of me wanted to feel bad for making him uncomfortable, but that feeling quickly went away when I remembered what Topanga told me on our way home that night.

“It wasn’t the fact that you left me to go hookup with someone that made me mad, I mean that was part of it, but I would have just let that go…Do you want to know what really hurt me?”

Shawn slowly looks up at me, his eyes bearing into mine.

“Cory and Topanga went looking for us because we had “disappeared”. Topanga found you, and when she told you that she couldn’t find me, you said you were “preoccupied” and brushed it off like it was no big deal.”

“Y/N/N I swear, I-I wasn’t thinking, I didn’t mean it.”

“Why would you even say something like that to begin with? Especially about someone that you call your best friend?”

He adverted his eyes, he couldn’t even look at me.

Good.

“I could’ve been in that bathroom with Leonardo DiCaprio, and I would still would have left to go find you. Because that’s what you do when you care about someone…Do you even care about me, Shawn?”

I hated the fact that my voice cracked, but I was seriously a few words away from crying, and I didn’t want to look at him anymore.

“Of course I do,” he replied. I could feel his hesitance as he made his way closer to me. “I can’t tell you how sorry I am about the things that I said, the things that I did. I was caught up in a moment and I wasn’t listening. And I-I know that’s not an excuse and I’m not trying to say it is. It was stupid, I was stupid. And wrong, so, so wrong. I shouldn’t have left you without saying anything, and I should have been there for you, I know. No one should feel like they’re not wanted…”

He brought his hand up to my face, turning it to face him.

“…especially you.”

We stayed like that, staring into each other's eyes in silence, until he wrapped his arm around me and joked: “…and I should know, neither of my parents wanted me.”

“Shawn…”

“Okay, I know, I shouldn’t joke about that, but still. I care about you so much, Y/N. I never meant to hurt you, you gotta believe that. And I’ll do anything, and I mean anything, to make it up to you…”

I just looked at him. I didn’t really know what to say.

“I-I don’t want to be the reason I lose you, Y/N/N.”

#shawnhunterxreader #shawn hunter x reader #shawnhunter #shawn hunter #boy meets world #boymeetsworld #welcometomyworldbabes #rider strong #riderstrong

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sp1rit-realm · 1 year

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༻¨*:· 𝐈 𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐘𝐨𝐮, 𝐓𝐨𝐨 ·:*¨༺

𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏

༻¨*:· summary ·:*¨༺ you and remus are just friends. with benefits.

༻¨*:· notes ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 fem!reader 𖦹 mutual pining 𖦹 idiots in love 𖦹 a sprinkle of angst 𖦹 mature themes, nothing graphic 𖦹 shitty writing/ending 𖦹 i did not proofread this bc i'm lazy ⎝(ˊᗜˋ)⎠

༻¨*:· word count ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 725

Satan is all about temptation, right?

'Temptation is a trial in which man has a free choice of being faithful or unfaithful to god.'

Remus was pretty sure it was something like that.

All he knew was that you were a trial of temptation, and he would gladly choose to go through that trial any day of the week. Because fuck, the way you said his name and the way you felt around him was so goddamned erotic. It was pornographic, and he couldn't get enough.

But he also cherished those small moments with you. He would never tell you, though.

He adored seeing you apply makeup or brush your teeth. It was all so domestic, and he selfishly wished he was the only one to see you like this. He prayed that your other hookups didn't get to see you do the most mundane things, like washing your hair. He rationally knew they also saw you like this, but, in his greatest fantasies, you were just for him to see. Only he got to see you laugh at something stupid on the TV while eating crisps. Only he got to see you fluff the pillows on the bed.

With blown pupils, he watched your chest rise and fall, "What the fuck?" He murmured.

The words caused a wave of confusion to crash into you; it turned into a weird feeling of hurt.

"Hm?"

Remus went rigid, for just a second, before speaking again, "Nothing about you, Lovely. Nothing about you," He opened his arms and mumbled:

"C'mere, baby."

Baby.

That stupid pet name rang in your ears each time he said it.

Baby, baby, baby.

Each syllable was more deafening than the last.

You crawled into his lap and basked in the sensation of his chest against your back, hands roving along your body like he could never get enough of how your skin felt.

"So pretty."

You detested how his lust-slurred words were laced with tenderness.

Still, you let your body melt into him as he praised you.

"I would never talk about you like that, my lovely girl."

Then, he let out a breath colored by the ghost of a laugh, "I s'pose I'm talkin' like that 'cos of you, though."

"Why?" Your voice was quiet and lazy.

"'Cos, what the absolute fuck did you do?"

His calm tone only confused you more. "Hm?"

He closed his eyes and spoke into your hair, "Did you lace your lips with a fuckin' love potion?" He took a breath, articulating during his exhale, "You make me crazy. Absolute fuckin' insane. I want to kiss you silly."

He hugged you tighter against him.

You closed your eyes and tried your hardest to disguise the sigh you let out as bliss rather than despair.

Remus, ever so observant, could tell.

"What's wrong?" He frowned at the idea of him hurting you.

"Nothing," You dismiss. Remus is having none of it.

"No, it's not 'nothing,'" He rests his head on your shoulder, "Something's wrong. What is it?"

"Let it go, Remus," You sigh and try to get up. He doesn't let you.

"You're staying here," His breath tickles your neck, and he smiles at the giggle you let out.

You fall asleep with his arms around you, hoping he'll wake you with chaste kisses. He did; you fell just that much more in love with him.

When you went over to Remus's the first time, you didn't intend on getting ruined, but he made a suggestive comment, and then you were in his bead screaming his name. When a man like Remus Lupin comes knocking on your door, you don't turn him down. But maybe you should have ended it a long time ago because your feelings for him only grew with each hookup. Still, you kept returning because having some of him is better than having none of him, right?

You tried to convince yourself that your feelings were just faulty. A boy was giving you attention, so you thought you liked him. But your mind knew better than to listen to you. Your brain remembered all the times you cried when he was with someone else in school, when your eyes lingered on him for a little too long, and how your heart skipped a beat when he was around.

You were so, so screwed.

༻¨*:· thank you for reading, my lovelies ·:*¨༺

Mutuals ଘ(੭ ˊᵕˋ)੭*༺ ♡‧₊˚ @forourmoons @sw34terw34ther @innerloverpainter @evergreenlover @nyxxxxxxxx @masivechaos @puppy-coded @youre-so-lovely @lucasnclair @woahlifehitsyahuh

#remus lupin #fwb!remus lupin #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin fic #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin angst

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daceydeath · 1 year

Text

Cigarettes and Cliches (Part 5)

Pairing: Lee Felix x Reader Word Count: 6.0k Genre: Collage AU, Slow Burn Romance Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI, swearing, drinking, smoking, mentions of bullying.

He was the most impractical guy for you to be interested in the incredibly handsome cliché bad boy who collected girls like trophies. As hard as you wanted to stay away you couldn't even if it might cost you everything and leave you heartbroken you couldn't ignore him

Felix had sent you his number over your social before he left to allow you to make a decision if you wanted to text him or not, giving you an out if you didn't want to continue what had happened or allowing you to get to know him better. You waited until that night when you had gone back into your room before you actually saved his number and texted him not really sure what or how to proceed, no one had ever kissed you like that before in fact you had only been kissed four times in your life and you were worried that he could tell how inexperienced you were. In the summer between your fourth and fifth year of high school you had decided that you needed to have a little experience before you arrived into university life, that wouldn't interrupt your grades, but two messy make outs and the first time you had sex had left you pretty well sworn off men so you had never show any interest in getting a boyfriend or hooking up again.

Hi Felix, still don't regret it? you typed the same words out at least ten times before you actually pressed send and threw your phone on the bed and changed yourself into your pajamas. Unsure if you were hoping that he would either see it and reply or be too busy to even see it, the universe decided that it would be the former as your screen lit up only a minute later.

Hey, was wondering if you would msg me. I still don't regret it, do you?

Shit, you didn't know what to say to him usually you guessed you could have asked a friend but there was absolutely no way you were asking either Seungmin or Jeongin about how to flirt with a guy they had told you to stay away from. Pulling your hoodie over the tank top you were wearing to bed you went out to the kitchen to get some water to hopefully make you calm down.

Is no answer your way of saying you do? because I won't ever do it again if you don't want me to or are you just shy and overthinking?

Double shit you panicked when you saw your screen lit up when you returned to your room. Taking a deep breath you picked up your phone and just typed hoping he would get how nervous you were about everything "I liked it, I just don't know what happens now, I'm not very experienced with any of this" you were totally sure that he would laugh at you now and tell you that you should just be friends.

I want to get to know you, nothing has to happen if you don't want it to

His sweet words made your heart calm down he wasn't pushing you, he wasn't going to just ask for a hookup and he seemed to still be genuine I would like that Felix, I need to get some sleep I will talk to you tomorrow? you watched as he saw the message and instantly replied.

Night, I will talk to you tomorrow then

You held your phone to your chest feeling happy but also scared, you knew after everything that happened you shouldn't get involved with Felix but you couldn't help it. He was gorgeous, sure but it was the side of him that he seemed to hide from the others the soft sweet Felix that you were attracted to and unfortunately you were already too far gone now to save yourself. He wasn't going to hurt you more than Nali already had so you were willing to give it a chance at least for now.

Waking up to the sounds of Seung and Innie making too much noise was not unusual for you but the third and fourth voice were different, getting up you quickly washed up and changed into sweats so that you were not in your pajamas and made your way out. Surprised was a little bit of an understatement when you found all eight of them sitting at the dining table or lounging on the couches trying there hardest to be quiet by texting each other instead of speaking.

"You're up" Seungmin ginned from the kitchen pulling your mug from the cupboard to fill with coffee.

"Thank fuck texting while in the same room is stupid" Minho groaned his head falling back on the couch to see you with lopsided smile on his lips.

"Sorry about that I didn't know were were having some early morning get together today?" you furrowed your eyebrows as you made your way over to get you coffee your phone beeping as you went. You pulled it out and saw a text from Felix you look cute this morning while you tried your hardest not to look at him or blush.

"Well we have some good new we heard through the grapevine and we wanted to see your face if it was true" Chan smiled at you affectionately.

"Good news?" you repeated still looking confused while you sipped your coffee.

"Check your school email" Jeongin pushed you softly towards your laptop that was still sitting on the table from the night before.

"Alright, alright Innie" you sighed dramatically pulling the device over to you and opening it to allow it to boot up, trying also to not blush as the way Felix's hand happen you brush against your leg then rest on top of your knee from where he was already sitting at the table. After the few moments it took to wake up you logged into your email account to see what Jeongin was on about. At the top of your inbox sat an email from the university administrators account marked with a reg flag to show it's urgency, clicking on it it opened and you saw several attachments including the minutes from the meeting you had with the head of the university. You clicked the first letter that was attached and read through it twice before you smiled slightly.

"Well?" Han whined "The suspense is killing me".

"The university have finished their investigation and decided that it was in fact an act of bullying against me and an act of defamation against all of your characters" You smiled looking up at them as the all as they watched you read the letter intently "Nali has been found to be the main perpetrator of this and five of her friends have also found to be 'lacking in the correct character', whatever that means, all six will be expelled immediately and will be required to leave campus by no later than the end of the week".

"Yes! you did it" Changbin grinned at you pumping his fist in the air.

"They are also forwarding a copy of the findings to the police should I want to pursue this further" you finished smiling wider "So it's over then?"

"See you were so brave and it paid off" Seungmin patted your shoulder.

"So we should go get food to celebrate" Changbin suggested.

"You always want to get food" Han rolled his eyes teasing him effortlessly.

"Of course because food is delicious" you added winking at Changbin who laughed loudly.

"Did you want to change or go now?" Jeongin asked quickly putting his hand out to stop you getting out of the chair.

"Seung says I'm cute in sweats I'll have you know Innie" you stuck yout tongue out at him "but I can change so I don't embarrass you" you pouted as he let you stand going to your room again to change.

"Innie that was a dick thing to say" Chan chastised quietly.

"She knows I didn't mean it Chan it's fine" Jeongin laughed making you roll your eyes from your room. It's true you knew he wouldn't make you change and normally you would have told him to get stuffed but Felix was there and it wouldn't hurt to look a little nicer. You slipped into dark blue jeans and a cute little shirt before throwing a cardigan over the top.

"Innie, are pink sweats acceptable?" You yelled through the wall hearing Seungmin laugh which meant Jeongin was rolling his eyes.

"I swear you spend your whole life in sweats except when you go to work no wonder you never get guys attention" Jeongin began rambling as you picked up a purse and opened the door to watch him continue his little rant "you look like one of the guys I'm surprised people don't think we have a male room mate....and you look so pretty right now" he finished quickly as he saw you.

"Aw thanks Innie" you giggled as he flushed "Now can we get food I'm starving" the guys all nodded before beginning to discuss where to go leaving you able to steal a little glance at Felix who was trying to not stare at you which made heat flood your cheeks.

You followed them down the hallway when your phone beeped again Now you look extra cute his message read making you swallow hard and slip your phone into your pocket so the others wouldn't see what he had sent. After pulling the door shut after everyone you made your way to the elevator leaning with your back against the wall you decided to be brave and text him back.

Flirt, but you look cuter you typed quickly pressing send before Hyunjin pulled you into a conversation.

"So now that the mean girls are gone will you give going out a shot? We would make sure you had fun" Hyunjin smirked.

"Maybe" you shrugged watching as Felix pulled his phone from his pocket to check the text he had just received, you saw him smile his eyes flicking you yours for a moment before he put it quickly back in his pocket "who knows maybe I should have a more normal uni experience since that is what Seung and Innie have been going on about for the last two hundred years" you chuckled as both of them groaned in unison.

"We will never live that down will we?" Seungmin sighed looking at you.

"No, not until you say something else that royally annoys me to take its place" you smile sweetly.

The announcement of the expulsions and the reminder of the correct behavior and etiquette towards fellow students was made later that afternoon in a detailed email that was sent to every enrolled students email address as well as their official website and as a press release. The need to show that they had indeed taken action after an investigation and that the students who had broken the university's tenants were swiftly punished was needed to show the city and the rest of the academic world throughout the country that it was indeed a first class school to be trusted. You weren't surprised by that at all in fact you were sure that would happen regardless of the outcome but you were surprised when people sent you messages of support through your socials and email. You knew that the police case would need to happen but until then at least you could attend your lectures again without the worry of what people would say or do.

By the time you got back to the apartment with Seungmin and Jeongin you were still floating on your own little happiness cloud. Felix had flirted with you over text a dozen more times before you all split ways and you felt like you heart was going to skip a beat every time his eyes met yours. He seemed to be so different to how you had seen him before, just another hot fuck boy, but he was genuinely a good guy and so were Minho and Hyunjin. It surprised you how your feelings on them had done a total 180 since meeting them but you were glad that they did.

"You seem actually happy, it looks good on you" Seungmin patted your head as he made his way further into the apartment.

"I am happy but I'm still a little torn that Nali has ruined her education over a guy who had no interest in her in the first place" you admitted softly.

"It's not sad its fucked up" Jeongin rolled his eyes "who goes after their own friend instead of just talking to them about it?".

"She did talk to me about it, she was just too far gone on Felix to think that I was a threat to her being with him" you shrugged "As if I was the reason they weren't a thing".

"It's stupid and insane really, you are too good for Felix anyway why would she even think he would be interested in you?" Seungmin chucked looking at you while you tried to keep your face neutral.

"I guess because I was the one who answered the door bell camera" you furrowed your brows together "she wouldn't have know about me otherwise".

"I'm sorry you lost friends over this" Jeongin smiled at you sympathetically "but you still have us".

"I would say I gained friends actually" you smiled looking at him fondly. "I didn't know I was going to end up with six more friends who treat me better than the few I lost".

"Yeah I'm pretty sure any of us would look after you now which is a little annoying that we have to share you" Seungmin teased dramatically.

"Uhuh and Hyunjin's the dramatic one" you laughed enjoying that it was back to somewhat normal now.

"Were going out tonight if you want to come?" Jeongin added hopefully.

"Where are you going because that will decide my answer Innie" you teased knowing full well that you would probably still say no.

"Its a house party" Seungmin laughed going into the kitchen as you flopped down on the couch.

"Right, no thanks I don't like drunk frat boys" you rolled your eyes.

"House parties aren't frat parties you know" Jeongin defended "this one is a guy in my faculty he's not a frat guy it will be more low key than that".

"How about I think about it. If its really going to be that small I'll go" you humored him knowing you still didn't want to go but if you were ever going to attend a university party a smaller tamer one was your best option to not get too overwhelmed. Your phone ringing ended the conversation there as you looked to see your mother's picture flash up on your screen.

"Hi mama" you answered still smiling at Jeongin who was disappointed he couldn't keep trying to convince you to go with him.

"You are coming home next week for your semester break" your mother's strict voice loudly announced into your ear making you wince.

"Oh I will need to check my schedule" you blinked opening your laptop.

"Your schedule is empty you will be free to come home you are well aware of the rules we have young lady" she continued loudly her voice changing to a meaner tone.

"I mean my school schedule mama, I can't spend any time with you if I have to study for a test or essay that is in the first week back" you explained swallowing hard.

"Oh, of course your school schedule. That is acceptable" she replied curtly waiting for you to check your calendar. You really didn't want Seungmin or Jeongin to meet your parents in person, you didn't want anyone meeting your parents if you were being honest they could be exceedingly harsh if they weren't happy with something and you didn't want them forcing you to move out or forcing you home again which is why before even starting university you told them you would return for all breaks that you could to ensure a safe separation between them and the rest of your life.

"I have three tests in the first week, a essay worth 25% the following week that I am submitting my second draft tomorrow and then a half year exam so I will need to study full time over the next few weeks mama" you rattled off hoping that would be a good enough excuse to stop them coming.

"I will discuss this with your father than" she snipped "but we did not raise you to be so lazy, you should be ready to submit your final essay by now not a second draft what have you been wasting your time on? Have you gotten a boyfriend? your father will drag you home if you have"

"No mama, I may have let one subject slip slightly but I am currently at the top of three other classes" you defended softly not wanting to upset her further, looking up you saw both Seung and Innie frowning deeply at the conversation you were having making you feel even more ashamed of how lazy you must seem to them.

"Hmm, I guess that will have to do I want you to send your test results through for us to be sure you are working hard enough" she finally huffed hanging up without another word.

"Is that seriously how she speaks to you? like all the time?" Seungmin asked softly his eyes turning sad.

"Yeah but she isn't as harsh as my dad can be, hopefully my test scores will be enough to make them happy again" you smiled weakly fiddling with the cuff of your sweater.

"They shouldn't speak to you like that, they should be proud of you and supportive" Jeongin frowned harder.

"They have always been like this Innie. It is totally fine I'm used to it" you swallowed getting up to go hide in your room for a while. You could almost sense that they were going to start whispering about it and maybe even tell the others and you were a little torn they were your parents, you knew they loved you in their own way even if it was perhaps harder than how other parents love their children.

Sighing you flopped down on your bed and blinked back the tears that almost always came to your eyes when you spoke to your mother. Taking your phone out of your pocket and staring at it you texted the one person who currently made you feel good about yourself.

Felix, are you busy? you typed quickly hoping you weren't interrupting him.

For you I'm always free his reply almost instantly appeared on your screen making you feel a little lighter.

Are you going to the party with Seung and Innie? you typed trying to think up something to talk about with him with so you could have at least a little of his time.

I'm thinking about it, Hyunjin wants to go and Minho has been hooking up with a chick that will be there so probably you weren't sure if that was a good thing or not since you really didn't want to think about Felix with someone else. Are you going?

You weren't going and you already know that but maybe if you did you could spend some more time with him you were mulling over when his next message popped onto the screen I'm not pressuring you promise, you don't have to if you don't want to.

Innie asked me to go but I'm not sure that I should you typed back honestly you didn't want to ruin anyone else's night with your awkwardness.

If you change your mind we can hang out just let me know when you get here. No pressure baby your eyes widened he had never called you baby before, he had never used anything other than your name, you felt a jolt of excitement run through you. If he was wanting more you could at least give him a little more than secret conversations and that one kiss that you had shared that you couldn't stop thinking about.

Rolling off your bed you looked through your closet quickly not having any idea what you should be even wearing to something like a house party, would jean do? were you supposed to dress up? would you need to start on your makeup now so it looked good? With too many questions and not enough experience you decided to bit the bullet and ask Innie what you should wear and let him get stupidly excited that you were going with them. Opening your bedroom door you stuck your head out and saw Seungmin pulling ingredients for dinner out of the fridge and Jeongin sitting on the couch on his phone.

"Hey Innie are you busy?" you smiled hopefully as he turned his head towards you.

"What can't you reach now?" he laughed at you getting up slowly.

"Oh it's not something I can't reach it's just I need a little bit of help with something" you explained quickly while confusion bloomed on his face "I need some help with an outfit".

"You what?" his face lit up as you heard the distinct sound of crashing from the kitchen as you ducked back into your bedroom with Jeongin hot on your heels.

"That means you are coming with us right? Because we are going to have so much fun and the other guys will be there so you have nothing to worry about" Jeongin started rambling throwing open your closet door to look at your options.

"Look this isn't some scene from a drama where you give me a make over I just need some advice that's all" you groaned realizing that this was perhaps a terrible idea.

"So wear your ripped jeans, this cropped shirt and your sneakers" Jeongin instructed looking like he was still in thought "you can wear softer make up to make it look less casual if you want then just a long necklace and maybe some rings".

"Not going for a lot of attention after all" Seungmin laughed from your doorway no doubt finding what you were sure was a dumbfounded expression on your face funny "Can't actually believe you would come with us".

"Well I wasn't going to but then after my mother called I thought maybe it would be a good idea since the semester is over tomorrow and I just lied to her to get out of going home for the break" you admitted softly.

"She really shouldn't talk to you like that and we are both sorry she does" Jeongin patted your hair carefully "You are a far harder worker than either of us and we are still doing well in our classes so you shouldn't feel bad".

"Thank you, when are you going to be leaving?" you asked looking at the clothes on the bed that Innie had chucked there.

"You have pleanty of time we will eat first then go about 9" Seungmin smiled broadly at you.

"I'll tell the other's you are coming so that they are slightly less disgusting than usual" Jeongin joked moving to leave you to get changed.

"No let them have fun I have seen them drunk anyway" you laughed feeling bad for impinging on their night out.

You had eaten and then gotten ready, still feeling a little out of place with the whole idea that you were actually on your way to a party that would have made your parents furious with you after lying about your workload, but the other part of you felt rebellious and free doing something that you knew was so forbidden to you. You hadn't messaged Felix knowing that either Seung or Innie will have told all of them you were coming too so you hope he wouldn't be unhappy to see you. Walking inside a random open front door that had music pumping away was a odd sensation like ignoring all the times you were told not to get into strangers cars but also slightly alarming considering how drunk some people already were making Seung chuckle as he guided you back towards the lounge where the others probably were.

"Woah, so the message was real" Han crowed loudly making Chan and Changbin turn your way as the three of you made your way through the crowd to them.

"Well I couldn't say no forever could I?" you teased easily falling into the comfort of them surrounding you.

"That's true couldn't have you breaking Innie's little heart now could we" Chan laughed easily his dimples on full display and Changbin moved over and patted the arm of the couch he was sitting on.

"Sit, Innie can go get you a drink and we will look after you" Changbin grinned widely making you giggle as you sat on the arm of the couch and Seung sat on the one opposite you next to Han.

"So what quintessential experience is this supposed to be exactly?" you asked sarcastically as Innie handed you a plastic cup filled with soda.

"Well usually it would be getting drunk and hooking up but you aren't going to do either of those things are you?" Seungmin shrugged "So I guess it's laughing at other drunks and making fun of these guys when they strike out"

"Achievable I say" you smirked taking a sip of your drink while Han protested loudly. You hadn't seen Felix, Hyunjin or Minho since you arrived and you thought about texting Felix but decided that you would just wait to see how things went.

"What are you doing for semester break?" Changbin asked bumping his shoulder against your hip.

"I have nothing planned yet" you smiled putting your cup down next to theirs as you turned to look at Changbin while you spoke to him.

"So you aren't going home then?" he tilted his head watching you closely as he spoke.

"No, my parents wanted me to but I told them I need to study for tests that I have first week back" you bit your lip nervously admitting to acting so childishly.

"Then you can spend more time hanging with us! It would be nice to hang out without always having your little bodyguards around" he winked cheekily.

"My bodyguards?" you chuckled confused.

"He means your room mates" Chan grinned raising gesturing to where Seungmin and Jeongin were talking to a couple of girls without moving too far away from you and the others.

"I thought they were your mates?" you raised your eyebrows at them both.

"They are but we thought maybe we could hang out a bit without them get to know you better" Changbin shrugged casually.

"Sure I guess I have to go back to work next week but I'll have free time" you smiled again before you moved to pick your drink up again, you sat sipping at it as you listed to Chan, Changbin and Han talk about random things you saw a familiar face make his way through the people filling up the kitchen, Hyunjin looked like he had come from outside so you pulled out your phone to see if Felix had sent you anything, you started writing the message that you were at the party when you saw Minho getting dragged though the lounge and up the stairs followed by the wolf whistles and cheers of most of the boys in the crowd making you scrunch up your nose in disgust.

"It's only sex" Hyunjin purred as he snuck in beside you.

"Hyunjin!" you squeaked almost dropping your half full cup on Changbin "fuck don't sneak up on people"

"Sorry princess" he laughed heartily at your still scandalized expression and the looks of amusement on the others.

"And its the whole gross cheer squad thing that's ick" you continued glaring at him slightly.

"Oh so if no one cheered you wouldn't care?" his voice was still low and close to your ear.

"I'm sorry to disappoint but I am never going to care where you stick your dick as long as what happened with Nali never happens to me again" you rolled your eyes making Changbin snicker beside you.

"Aw that stings just a little" Hyunjin continued teasing you.

"Sorry I'm just not that into man whores" you shrugged as nonchalantly as you could.

"You tell him tiger" Han cheered laughing at how Hyunjin's eyes widened at your use of their nickname for him Minho and Felix. With all the teasing you almost forgot about Felix not being with them until Hyunjin left to get another drink.

I decided to come to the party if you still want to hang out you sent the message and kept your phone in your hand so you would feel it go off when he answered back but after twenty minutes without an answer you slipped in back into your pocket and excused yourself to find the bathroom.

The bathroom was unfortunately across the hall from the room Minho had found himself in and his lady friend was obviously having a good time from the volume of her voice bouncing off he walls even louder than the music. Rolling your eyes you stepped into the bathroom to find it thankfully empty so you could at least pee without being interrupted, checking your make up you were beginning to feel a little disappointed that Felix hadn't answered you and perhaps didn't want to waste his time with you, straightening you hair you unlocked the door to find yourself watching Felix's figure emerging from a room a pretty brunette leading the way down the stairs making you realize why he hadn't seen your message. Gulping down the pain that began radiating from your chest you made your way down the stairs slowly as to avoid as many people as possible before heading back towards the others.

"You alright?" Chan instantly asked him and Changbin the ones who had obviously drawn the short straws and were your designated babysitters.

"Actually I'm going to head home, I still don't like parties" you smiled tightly as Chan stood up to step round the table towards you "I can get myself home Chan stay, have fun and I'll see you guys around" you quickly turned walking back out the front door passed Seung and Innie who didn't notice you go.

You walked into the front terrace and saw Felix cigarette dangling from his fingers as he talked to Hyunjin and the collection of girls who were hanging around them, watching as Minho returned looking triumphant but alone to join them taking the cigarette from Felix and putting it to him lips. You closed your eyes for a moment and continued your walk out of the apartment block alone wrapping your arms around yourself to keep yourself warm and cursing yourself for not bringing a jumper but also for going in the first place, yes it had been nice to talk to the boys but you could have done that anywhere and it would have been easier then knowing that although he said he wanted to know you he was still happy to fuck whoever came his way while pretending you held his interest. You were angry at yourself for letting your heart think for you when you logically knew that as a fuck boy he was never going to care about you.

You were so lost in your head you completely missed the collection of drunk guys that were leaning against the wall of the outside of the terrace, looking like they had had at least four too many each until you were just passed them and too close to avoid them.

"Hey pretty baby where you going?" he slurred grabbing your arm and swinging you back to look at him, he was taller than you but the way he leaned over you made you feel even smaller in that moment.

"Please let go of me" you asked voice shaking trying to stay assertive and failing as he cracked a twisted grin.

"I don't think I will pretty girl" he got even closer, his breath reeked of cheap beer and his clothes stank with body odor.

"I think you will if you want to keep that hand" Felix growled making the guy flinch and let go of you "That's what I thought tough when you think its easy for you a coward when you will lose" you began rubbing your forearm to try to make the pain go away.

"Preying on girls half your size...tsk" Hyunjin smirked as Minho flanked Felix's other side

"Should we teach him a lesson?" Minho drawled lazily his face expressionless "I think it's an arm for an arm don't you darling" the guy paled further realizing that you did know them and you weren't scared of them.

"Felix don't' you whispered as he took you arm gently in his hands to look over any injury you had.

"You sure? any of us could take him by ourselves you don't have to worry about it" he muttered not wanting to alert the idiot in front of you.

"He isn't worth it" you mumbled "I just want to go home".

"I'll get you back to your place" he smiled before switching back to his normal self "I'm getting her home take care of the trash for me boys" he smirked at the guy before wrapping his arm around your shoulder and walking you away. Once you got to the end of the block Felix let you go so that you were no longer sandwiched to his side.

"Thank you" you smiled shyly shivering slightly from the cold now that he wasn't as close to you.

"Shit are you cold?" he asked quickly shrugging out of his leather jacket and helping you put it on even though it was far too big for you.

"I'm alright, but shouldn't you go back to the party before someone misses you" You almost winced suddenly remembering what you had seen earlier.

"No ones going to miss me" he grinned staying close to your side as you continued walking.

"Not even that girl you were with upstairs?" you weren't meaning to ask him at all let alone blurt it out like that but your mouth had acted faster than your brain had.

"Huh?" he stopped walking grabbing your had to stop you to as he pulled you gently to face him "What are you talking about?".

"I saw you when I was coming out of the bathroom leaving a bedroom with a pretty dark haired girl, I'm not judging I swear, I just thought you would probably be more interested in going home with her than me" you swallowed hard trying to not let any emotion cross your face.

"Oh her! we weren't doing anything together I swear she wants Hyunjin not me and I told her I was taken anyway" He explained his eyes not leaving yours "I told her that although I would love to help her make Hyunjin jealous I have a girlfriend now and I couldn't but that Minho probably would".

You nodded swallowing hard before turning back towards the direction you were walking so not only were you wrong about him hooking up you were wasting your time on him while he was actively seeing someone else.

"Maybe you should get back to your girlfriend then Felix" You sighed tugging your wrist free from his grip and starting to walk again.

"For someone so damn smart you are pretty dense" he groaned catching up with you instantly and grabbing your hand intertwining his fingers with yours "I was talking about you".

"What?" You stuttered out looking at him wide eyed.

"It's easier for me to say I've got a girlfriend then tell them no so they don't get upset, but it also means that while we get to know each other you know I'm serious" he continued smiling "because I want to get to know you".

"But what about when people ask you about your girlfriend?" you asked surprise still coloring your voice.

"Then I will tell them she is beautiful, kind and the sweetest girl you could ever hope to meet" he hummed softly raising your hand to his lips and placing a kiss on your knuckles.

"Felix" you bit your lip as he lowered your hand but kept it in his grasp.

"Besides maybe you will want to give me a chance once you decide if I'm more than just a man whore" he smirked playfully.

a/n: Thank you for reading and your continued support of my work I cannot tell you how much it means to me. As always I cherish your comments, reblogs and likes and love you eternally xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz, @armystay89, @damnyouficc, @roamingpolar, @bakedlilgoonie, @shiy, @is2cb97, @beautifulixr, @skyhold-tara, @army-stay-noel, @skizzel-reblogs, @facelesswrittes, @animehideout, @mrsseals16, @honey-pop, @fawnpeaks, @leeknowinggg, @uno7, @seungminluv3, @obeythemasters, @tanzen-ist-gold,

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hotxcheeto · 2 years

Note

please please do ellie angst where the f/r sleeps with ellie and ellie eventually breaks her heart by cheating but ellie truly regrets it. maybe some comfort at the end? like some fluff

━ 𝐍𝐎𝐓 𝐀 𝐂𝐎𝐔𝐏𝐋𝐄

𝙥𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜(𝙨) - Ellie Williams x Fem!Reader

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 - Cursing, angst, slightly happy ending? with a lil fluff, mentions of 'cheating' but it isn't technically cheating, ellie really hurts readers feelings, mentions of sex / hookup, lying, ellie being manipulative ( just mentioned ), crying

𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙤𝙛𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 ? - Yeah/Nope

𝙖𝙪𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙧'𝙨 𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙚 - I don't condone cheating and I don't really like writing it so here's this i hope you enjoy! sorry this took so long! thank you for the rq!

also i lowkey based it off that tiktok sound that goes 'laurie, you're being mean stop it."

You weren't sure where it all went wrong.

You liked her, for years. And you were sure she'd liked you back. You were positive of it, so was Dina and hell even Jesse through his two cents in there every once in a while.

You were sure she'd liked you back, she knew you liked her, why else would she invite you over for a sleepover to chill and watch a movie with her, flirting with you the entire night and for what?

She knew, that's why it hurt.

It was a night that you remember so clearly and fuzzily at the same time, but with a smile, it was an accident honestly, you and her hooking up.

But you were so excited, you do remember that.

Even through all the hazy kissing and light touches that were shared, you remember how happy you were. The smile on Ellie's face, laying together in the afterglow.

And how you told Dina the next morning, and how she was probably more happy than you after seeing you both pining after each other for so long. But of course Jesse was left out, because you were too flustered to allow her to tell him despite the clear excitement on her face and the giddiness that her two best friends would finally be together.

But you were glad Dina didn't tell him, so that at least the embarrassing moment could be kept between you both.

And Ellie, if you count her chasing after you after you came to talk to her. Seeing another girl coming from her house, hurrying to get dressed and meeting your eyes with a shy smile. Waving to you with her bra half out, it would've been funny.

A fun story to tease her about, if you weren't practically in love with her and admitted it to her.

You smiled, you did. And you hated yourself for it, but it wasn't her fault. It was Ellie's, for making you feel so good and for telling you so many lies while doing it.

But what could you do, you weren't a couple.

So you turned around and walked away, even while she called your name and came after you. Even while your eyes blurred with tears and your lip quivered as you choked back your cries.

Because you liked her, and she told you she liked you too.

"Please, please just wait I can explain." "Then do it. You slept with her, didn't you?" You turned around to her avoiding her eyes, but still nothing came out. Mouth opening and closing as an excuse rested on her tongue and she couldn't bring herself to say it.

"Well, come to me when you put your excuse together, okay? And when you can answer the question" You said quietly, turning back around and continuing back to her gate. Passing Joel on the way who just so happened to see a bit more than he wanted to.

"Y/n. Please, for fucks sake just listen–"

"We're not a couple Ellie, so stop chasing me like you're losing me."

She stared at you, pleading with you without saying a word.

"You had me, it's not my fault you didn't want to keep me."

That's what now led you to be sitting across from Dina at the booth, her mouth hung open and her eyes filled with anger and shock. Yours avoiding hers in fear that you'd also see yourself in them.

"That fucking dic–" "It's alright Dina. We aren't together, we never were." She shook her head. "No fucking way, you guys were like this–" She motioned with her hands at how close you both were "–and she does that!" "Dina, keep your voice down."

Dina took in a sharp breath and then nodded, setting her head on her hand.

"Right, sorry." You shook your head. "It's all good." "Well maybe now you can talk to that new bartender, she seems really nice. And isn't a dickhead." "Dina."

"No way Y/n. She told you she liked you, then she does some shit like that?"

You nodded silently, looking down at your drink.

"I know."

You guy sat in a comfortable quiet, Dina reaching you to caress your hand, running her finger along your knuckles. Grabbing your hand as you began to feel the tears once more.

"I thought she really liked me, D." "Trust me babe, I know."

Dina then froze, looking behind you at the front door of the bar. Then chugging her drink and ushering to yours.

"C'mon we can have a sleepover at my house, and take your mind off of her." "Okay."

You finished your drink, watching Dina hurrying to take both glasses up to the bar making you a bit confused, but happy to be getting away. Wanting nothing more for it all to be forgotten.

"Hey."

Then the moment was ruined, your world seeming to crash and your mind stuttering like an old DVD player. Slowly turning to face the voice with a tight chest and fear in your throat.

"Hey?"

Her mouth parted but nothing came out, seeing how tired you looked and how sad your eyes were. It's like she couldn't quite get the words out to tell you.

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

It was silent again, awkwardly while you shifted your weight from foot to foot begging for her to spit out her nonsense and to leave you alone once more.

"I... I like you. I did mean that."

"No you don't Ellie." You shook your head with tears in your eyes, choking up a sob. "Don't say that."

"I do." "Don't." You shook your head faster, begging her to just stop. "Don't, it's over. We had a night, it was great Ellie. But let's just stay friends, we weren't a couple it's okay." You assured her, you weren't sure why you were having to do it, why you had to tell her it was okay.

"It was a mistake, it didn't mean anything Y/n it didn't, I want you... I'm sorry I did it."

But she wouldn't quit talking even when you really wanted her too, it was like her specialty.

"But I do really like you and I know I fucked up–" "Stop it Ellie." "I do."

"You're being mean. Stop."

"No I'm not meaning to be mean–"

"Then why'd you do it? And why do you keep repeating yourself?"

Dina suddenly appeared behind you, glaring down Elie and if looks could kill Ellie would be dead on the floor.

"Let's go Y/n." "No I want to know. Why'd you do it?"

"I don't know."

Though you so desperately wanted an answer, neither of you had one. And the worst part is she knew, she knew the whole time and she didn't care.

"You used me."

Ellie's face dropped more than it already, shaking her head as you were.

"No, no fucking way Y/n."

"Well that's what it looks like Ellie."

Dina spoke up for you grabbing your hand and pulled you away towards the door, entering the cold of winter outside the doors. Stomping off with you attached to her and Ellie right behind.

"Just let me say what I need to, and if– if you hate me after you never have to talk to me again. I swear." She stopped at the end of the stairs, watching you pause and turn back to her then glancing to Dina.

"I'll catch up, promise."

"Fine. Then we can have our sleepover, and talk about the hot bartender."

You nodded, silently thanking her for standing by your side. But you wanted to talk to Ellie now, you wanted to hear whatever excuse she had or whatever 'explanation' she wanted to try to convince you of for hurting your feelings.

"I knew you liked me." "Everyone did." You stated, crossing your arms over your chest, laughing a bit despite the forcefulness that followed in your tone.

"I was scared. No one's ever... liked me like that."

"It's not like you cheated on me Ellie. We weren't together." She shook her head. "I hurt you though we didn't have to fucking be together. I knew you liked me and I liked you back and I fucked it up and fucked you over because I.. I didn't want to face the fact that you really cared about me."

You nodded. "Yeah. You did do that."

"I'm so used to people fucking me over and leaving.. I shouldn't have did that. I wasn't thinking. Can I make it up to you?" You shrugged. "I dunno Ellie. I just... maybe we should forget that night ever happened."

"But I don't want to."

You weren't sure if you were surprised or not, her hand reaching towards you, for some reason you took it. Examining her fingers as you then spoke to her,

"Then, make it up to me." "How?" You shrugged. "Figure it out. You seem to not think about things much, like other people's feelings, maybe you should try that."

Ellie new it was a harsh dig, but she felt she deserved it.

At least a little.

"What about tomorrow night?" "Fine. But if I don't like it, we drop this. Pretend it never happened. And you won't keep trying." She nodded even though she didn't want to. "Deal."

"M'kay. I gotta go, alright?" You moved in, pecking her cheek before backing up. "I'll see you later." "Okay. Yeah."

"Bye Ellie."

A/N: I TOTALLY BASED THIS OFF THAT ONE TIKTOK SOUND

the one that goes "no, no, no laurie, you're being mean, stop it."

FJKLDSJF;KLDJKG this made me lowkey sad ngl

#ellie x reader #ellie #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams imagine #ellie williams #the last of us #the last of us part 2 #tlou part 2 #tlou x reader #tlou 2 #tlou #nevy writes

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blorbocedes · 2 years

Note

carlando + infidelity

inspired by conversations with sionis j, the only other bitch here who appreciates infidelity

Carlos fixes his hair, inspecting the blooming bite mark Lando left on his shoulder as he came. Carlos always chides him for that. No marks, Landito, Carlos would warn or he'd flip him over so the only thing Lando could bite on is the pillow. But Carlos is too much of a romantic to not look him in the eyes as he comes, and Lando can't stand the weight of those big brown eyes -- completely blown on -- on him, which is how they land in this exact predicament every time.

"Y'know when, when I was with Luisa," Lando tries to say casually, fails, sounds hesitant instead. Carlos hums to show he's listening, so Lando continues, "She--we all messed around, right? Like me. And her. And Max. My Max, I mean. And she didn't mind, we were cool. So maybe, you could tell Isa. About us. And it would be cool."

Carlos turns to where Lando is sprawled on the couch, watching him. He takes a seat in the space between his legs, and moves forward to touch the side of Lando's flushed face, who leans into the touch. Carlos tenderly strokes a thumb against his cheek.

"And why... would I do that?" Carlos murmurs, voice low and patronizing, like Lando is a child who just said something outlandish. It stings as gentle his his touch is.

"So we don't have to... hide. We went on double dates. She liked Luisa. Maybe she wouldn't mind and we wouldn't have to sneak around." Lando's voice had whittled down quieter, losing confidence the longer Carlos stared at him scrutinising. He also never realized how Isa and Luisa sounded so similar. They had become fast friends, their girls, and when they went on doubles dates together Carlos' hand found it's way on Lando's thigh as they both sat across their respective girlfriends, and Lando had to try not react publicly.

"Lanno," Carlos sighs, the way he says his name exasperated, he does place a hand on his shoulder. "I am going to marry Isabella one day. Telling her would hurt her unnecessarily. Why do you want to hurt her?"

Mate, you're the one cheating on your girlfriend! Lando wants to say, but can't. He's the other woman in that situation, he has no legs to stand on. The promise to marry her in some distant future hurts in some vague way, even if Lando has known about it.

"What we have... is special, no?" Carlos probes gently, his hand digging on the bruise he left on Lando's collarbone, freshly single with no qualms about visible hickeys. It forces Lando to look at Carlos' sincere, warm, honey eyes and Lando finds himself wordlessly nodding along.

"Put these silly thoughts out of your beautiful head." Carlos leans in to kiss him, cradling his face, and no one in Lando's life -- not his Raya hookups, the gentleness of Luisa, the rushed desperation from Max -- no one kisses him with as much fervour and desire as Carlos does. One could mistake it for love.

"Hello, Lando." Isa hugs Lando -- ice shoots in his veins, wracked with guilt --, as Carlos invited him for his birthday dinner. With his girlfriend. Isa who has known Lando for years, treats him like a little brother, and is generally lovely to him every time they've met. He can barely look at her in the eyes, remembering what he did with her man hours prior. Carlos slides in the booth so Lando is one side, and Isa by his other, birthday boy in the middle with his cake.

#carlando #cw: infidelity #my fics #f1 rpf #carlos does a little manipulative malewifing #blorbocedes ask

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filmbyjy · 2 years

Text

JAM OUT - eighteen! worst day ever

synopsis > who knew you’d break the first rule of being in a friends with benefits relationship? maybe it was lee heeseung himself that made you catch feelings. either ways, he doesn’t do feelings and you knew that. as your relationship with heeseung strains so does the band. what happens then?

masterlist | previous | next

you weren’t one to barge home just so easily. even if you did, it was probably cause heeseung wanted a quickie before he went to play basketball with his friends (or hookup for the night)

but this time…you couldn’t take it. you had to question to boy.

“what the fuck is wrong with you.” you asked the boy as he was busy aggressively clicking on the controller. he looks up at you and pauses the game. which he did surprisingly. a bottle of soju next to him, pretty evident he had been drinking.

you noted that he probably went out with that girl earlier hence he had a new bottle of soju in his hands.

“what’s wrong with me? what’s wrong with you?”

“dont fucking contradict my question with another question, lee heeseung. answer me why the fuck you are so salty about me being with jake?”

“jake will only hurt your heart sweetheart.”

“and you haven’t been doing that?”

“(name), what do you mean?”

“I thought we were loyal to each other. we made that the number one rule of this fucked up relationship have!”

“but we also made it rule to not tell anyone else.”

“BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN GO AROUND FUCKING OTHER GIRLS WHO ARENT ME! WE WERE SUPPOSED TO BE LOYAL TO EACH OTHER.”

“well you fucked jake.” heeseung shrugs.

you groaned and tugged on your hair, “YOU WERE THE FIRST ONE TO BREAK THAT FUCKING RULE.”

“but you still did it.” heeseung says.

“heeseung you’re fucked up in the damn brain. I cant believe I fell in love with you, god.”

then it hits you. the words spilling out faster than you could stop yourself.

“you fell in love with me?” heeseung asks

“heeseung, can we please just forget what I said?” your voice strained.

“no, listen. you fell in love with me? while we hold this relationship? you know i dont do relationships (name).”

“EXACTLY, YOU WERE THE IDIOT THAT MADE THIS WHOLE RELATIONSHIP.” you say.

“AND YOU AGREED TO IT.”

“FUCK YOU, I WISH I NEVER BECAME FRIENDS WITH YOU OR FELL IN LOVE WITH YOU.” you yelled.

something crashes and when you turned to see who it was. it was your other friends. the boys, yeji and ryujin. their jaws were dropped. your eyes with the last person whom you didn’t want to know of this relationship with heeseung.

jungwon.

you ran up the steps and simply ran away. jake, sunoo, yeji and ryujin following in your steps. ni-ki, jay, sunghoon, hueningkai, taehyun and jungwon stayed.

jungwon balls up his fist and swings right at heeseung. heeseung holds up his jaw, shocked that the younger boy swung at him. jungwon gives heeseung the nastiest glare and jay only holds him back from causing more trouble. sunghoon goes to help heeseung up.

“LET ME HAVE HIM. HE HURT MY NOONA.” jungwon growls (which was cute to jay but now was not the time for simping)

“come on, hit me more. I’m proud to admit that I hurt your sister and made her cry a bunch. I am proud to say, I successfully played with your sister.” those words spill out of heeseung faster than he could stop himself.

jungwon fights to get out of jay’s grasp and jay tries his back to hold jungwon back. tears stinging jungwon’s eyes, it was angry tears. he was filled with rage.

“sunghoon, huening, ni-ki stay with heeseung hyung. me, taehyun and yedam will bring jungwon up to meet (name) and make sure she is alright.” jay instructs. sunghoon nods and so jay goes up whilst dragging jungwon.

the door opens and all jay sees is jake comforting you as you were bawling your eyes out. he lets jungwon go and jungwon falls to the ground crying equally as hard you. jay wraps his arms around the boy, caging him and letting him cry as much as he wanted.

everyone felt the sick tension in the air and they hated it. yedam, taehyun, sunoo, yeji and ryujin stole glances at each other, knowing this would end horribly.

“noona.” jungwon suddenly looks up. you looked up at your younger brother and simply held out your arms. jake lets you go and jungwon ran into your arms. crying harder by the second.

you hated this. you hated seeing your brother cry because of you.

today was officially the worst day for both you and jungwon.

and it was all because of

lee heeseung

taglist[open]: @junnniiieee07 @lhsdiary @woniesbakery @cyuuupid @qimmylol @lhsng @beans-and-jeanes @starggukies @maybee-may @gu8ki @taetaemylovie @thealatte @nyfwyeonjun @sakunasrealgf @diestheticu @mingyuswrld @iloveoceaneyes @viagumi @mymeloem19 @enhasengene @lalalalawon @te44sng @ahnneyong @ii4enha-jwn @allthegirlsmialoved @artstaeh @msxflower @monkeybabyzz @raimbows4u @hoteldelluna

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kimbappykidding · 1 year

Text

Other Parts: Part One and Part Three

After your initial hookups, you and Yeosang fell into an arrangement and started seeing each other pretty regularly, usually one or two times a week. His apartment was so beautiful you usually went to his but sometimes he'd come over to yours and now your members were familiar with him. You didn't really meet his members much but knew they were aware of what was going on based on how smiley they got whenever your groups bumped into one another...other groups however weren't so happy.

You were at an event for female girl groups when you noticed (G)I-DLE's Shuhua watching you. "Is it just me or does Shuhua know you and Yeosang are together?" Yunjin asked. You paused "Well we're not together, we're in an open relationship like they are. That's all". "Well I don't think they think it's as simple" Eunchae commented as Soojin made her way over to you. "Hey are you sleeping with Yeosang?" Soojin asked and Chaewon sat up taller, her leader instincts kicking in. "I don't see why that's any of your business" she replied coldly. You put a hand on her shoulder telling her it was okay "why?" you asked. "Because I just thought you should know yes also seeing Shuhua". You nodded "I know". "And you don't care?". "Well they're not dating or in an exclusive relationship, right?". "Well yeah" Soojin nodded and you nodded "so why would I? Nobodies getting hurt". "I wouldn't say that" Soojin said and you frowned "if Shuhua is upset I'm involved with Yeosang then I'm sorry for that but she needs to discuss it with him. Not me". Soojin sighed and walked away. "Well I think you handled that well. You didn't engage and kept it civil" Sakura complimented you. You nodded "there's no reason we have to hate each other just because we're hooking up with the same guy. I've never tried to keep Yeosang from other girls and I'm fine with the two of them hooking up. There's no problem unless we create one" and your members nodded. Yeosang found it a little funnier. "You actually told Shuhua to go talk to me?" he asked as you lay in bed together the next day. You nodded "yeah why shouldn't I?". "Well...weren't you worried she'd give me an ultimatum? You or her" he asked turning to face you. You smiled "no" and Yeosang grinned "you pain me Y/n". You chuckled "Yeosang were both adults having fun. I'm not playing games to keep you. You're not mine". Yeosang paused as you said that and he almost looked upset. You figured people probably fell for him quite easily and with good reason. However you didn’t attach easily and so you weren't one of them. Yeosang finally smiled "how very mature" and he kissed you.

However, Yeosang lay awake for a while that night after you'd fallen asleep. Your words had bothered him. He liked being the one that cared less in the relationship. It protected him and, as he saw it, gave him all the power but you seemed to care less than he did and he couldn't get how you could be so chill and unbothered. Didn't you like him? Well he knew you did. He could tell by the way you reacted to his touch but was that it? Did you just like him physically? He wasn't ashamed to admit he liked seeing guys and girls fall in love with him. He liked watching them slowly gather feelings for him and the security it gave him but now he knew what it felt like to be on the other side of it and he hated it. So he decided to investigate why you were so blasé about your relationship and something caught his eye. At the next award show he saw you chatting with BTS' Jungkook backstage and paused. Was that why? Were you in love with another guy? Was all of this to make someone else jealous? He hadn't realised you and Jungkook even knew each other but from how familiar you were acting you must be friends. Yeosang frowned watching the happy expression on your face and how charming Jungkook looked when he smiled at you. "Hey have you ever heard anything about Y/n and Jungkook?" he asked Wooyoung beside him. Wooyoung quickly located the two of you and shook his head "only that they're friends". "How?" Yeosang asked and Wooyoung smirked "I've no idea, why? Does it bother you? Getting attached huh?". "Of course not!" Yeosang said changing the subject but Wooyoung kept smiling at him. Later that evening Yeosang brought up Jungkook to you. You'd just gotten into his apartment and were both taking off your shoes and coats. "I didn't know you were friends, how did you meet?" Yeosang asked, hoping he sounded conversational. "We're from the same town" you said "we just became friends because of that". Yeosang nodded "have you and Jungkook ever...". You smiled "ever what?". "Been this kind of friend?" he asked. You laughed "no, why?". "I just saw you two together and you seemed into him". You smiled "did I?". Yeosang nodded "you were laughing a lot". You let out a breath "is someone jealous?". "No! Of course not!" Yeosang said quickly and your eyes widened at his strong reaction so he reigned it in. "I mean...would you like me to be?". You shrugged "jealously can be hot". Yeosang nodded "but you don't seem to get jealous ever". You shrugged "I'm good at hiding what I feel but yeah I'm not that possessive". Yeosang paused "so you don't care who else I'm seeing? Who also has a claim to me?". You shook your head "we're just casual right?". He shrugged "what if we weren't". "Well then I'd obviously feel differently...but you don't seem like a serious person". Yeosang nodded "you're right". "It's okay" you said patting his arm "because I've heard Jungkook is" and went to walk away but Yeosang tugged you back down. "What was that?" he asked and you smiled "you heard me". "I did and I say fuck Jungkook". You chuckled as Yeosang kissed you and clearly meant those words with how he was trying to help you forget him. “Well if you want me to” you said and Yeosang shook his head “bad choice of words, let me show you what I mean” and he carried you to the bedroom. Yeosang did have a room in the Ateez dorm near the studio and he stayed there pretty much whenever he wasn't with you meaning he hadn’t been there too much recently. So when he walked in the next day Yunho saw him and smiled "so he returns, tore yourself away from Y/n long enough to come home?" Yunho asked. Yeosang rolled his eyes "something like that". Yunho smiled "oh I almost forgot, Shuhua was calling for you, she seemed upset". "Yeah I can imagine that's because I called it off with her" Yeosang said. Yunho paused "you did? Why?". Yeosang shrugged "I hadn't seen her in weeks and it was beginning to feel like more of a chore than fun. So I ended it but she thinks I'll change my mind. So just ignore the calls". "She mentioned Y/n" Yunho said "did you end it for her?"." Yeosang shook his head "no". "Just you've been seeing Y/n a lot lately". Yeosang nodded "so? She's fun and I'm trying to work her out". "Work her out?" Yunho asked and Yeosang nodded "she's is really good at hiding her feelings so she never admits how she feels about me and plays it cool. It's a challenge and I'm enjoying it". Yunho nodded "so what happens when she lets the mask fall? Are you done?". Yeosang shrugged "I'm not sure". "And what if she's just got nothing to tell? What if she just isn't feeling anything for you?". Yeosang shot him a look "I have a pretty high success rate". "I know but your technique isn't going to work on everyone, there's a chance y/n just isn't falling for you". Yeosang smiled "not possible" and walked away.

Yeosang didn’t know where his members got this idea he was the vulnerable one in this relationship so he decided to bring you around to their house. They were having a BBQ and he thought if his members saw the way you melted for him they’d know for sure there was nothing to tease him about. Then you showed up looking amazing and Yeosang couldn’t get his mind off anything but getting through this as quickly as possible so he could escape upstairs with you. He had bigger things to worry about than what his members thought of his relationship with you and so when San started playing music he asked you to dance.

Yeosang didn’t dance often and figured this could be your undoing. He was right and a few songs later you couldn’t take your eyes off him. “Something caught your eye?” he asked whispering in your ear. You blushed and nodded “you of course, we’ve never danced together”. Yeosang smiled at how perfectly his plan worked “I was saving it for a special occasion, I’m guessing you enjoyed it?” he asked turning to look at you. You paused at how beautiful he looked and nodded “very much”. “Then maybe we should just stay here all night?” he teased and you shook your head “or we could go somewhere else”. Yeosang smirked “and do what? You know San’s been wanting to play Mario Kart all night, we could go do that”. You shot him a look “don’t make me say it”. “I want you to” he replied and you sighed “fine, I want you Yeosang now can we please go upstairs so you can stop looking at me like that and finally do something about it?”. Yeosang liked it when you got authoritative and told him what to do so he didn’t want to speak in case his voice gave that away. Instead he just nodded and took your hand leading you away from the party without another word.

Needless to say Yeosang’s plan failed spectacularly. When he came downstairs the next morning all his members just smirked. “Oh how the mighty have fallen!” Wooyoung called and Yeosang frowned “what?”. “I think he’s just saying you’re whipped” Hongjoong said helpfully and Yeosang frowned “what makes you say that?”. “How about how your jaw dropped when you saw what Y/n was wearing yesterday?” San asked. “Or how you danced with her when you never dance at parties” Mingi added “or how you even invited her to an event like this, you’ve never done that with a fling before” Yunho said and Yeosang sighed. “It’s okay” Hongjoong said laughing “there’s nothing wrong with liking someone. Plus we all see why you do, Y/n is great”. The guys all nodded and Yeosang shrugged “see that I will agree to but you all better remember she’s mine!” Yeosang said. He thought it sounded cool and strong but only later realised he’d announced to all his members he was attached and wanted you...he was fighting a losing battle.

You were surprised when you hear Yeosang had ended it with Shuhua. He told you so casually that it was over with her that you didn't know how to react. Your members were also confused. "Y/n is there any chance this is becoming more?" Chaewon asked. You shook your head "no I mean...we just hook up a few times a week. I think he and Shuahua must just have been on the outs". "And if it does mean more?" Kazuha asked "then what? Do you want to date Yeosang?". You paused "I...I honestly can't imagine what that would even be like. We've purposefully stayed away from that. We're not clinical but we don't go out on dates or talk about our feelings seriously. So I don't even know what it'd be like to date him or if Yeosang is even capable of that" you admitted. The members nodded "well we will support you either way of course". You smiled and thanked them. You figured whatever was happening with Yeosang would reveal itself and you were proven right the very next week...

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