#also no darling I hate that he’s so self deprecating sometimes like darling believe me you could play Coachella (not sure if they’d let
Text
instagram
Do you want to discover what bands @mileskane listens to while ironing his shirts? Then listen to this episode of the music podcast @kendedital with the nicest and funniest guy in the music business!
We had a blast! 🫶🏽
-
"I'm willing to play anywhere. Even now, if I were offered a gig at the pub across the street, l'd take it. I simply love playing. If you asked, I'd play right this moment. I just love playing, I'm not arsed. It's what it's all about." X
-
Miles when being asked about AM’s new sound:
mk: "you gotta respect it, you know, like, that's me bro, i'm always gonna have his back, you know what i mean? yeah and i respect for a big band to follow their gut. that's what al does and you gotta respect it whether you like it or not. it's kind of what all great artists do."
interviewer: "like it's cool that you kinda... you want to fucking do it so you do
mk: "yeah, man, that's me boy. if he wants to sing french or sing nigerian, i'm gonna have his back, you know what i mean?"
-
🫶🏽🫶🏽🥹🥹🥺my boys
Like I hate it that he’s always asked bout AM and TLSP cause he’s promotion his solo tour but this is 😘
So you’re telling me they are literally promoting Miles and Liam djing with a Tlsp pic 😭😭🫠🥺
Imagine if Alex were you just casually show up behind that DJ booth
with his bosom friend Alex Turner
At Crammerock we saw him strolling backstage. We decided to put on our naughty shoes and ask him. He turned out to be very amable and he was immediately enthusiastic about our concept,
So, you set out on your own
You shut up shop, you're leavin' home
You feel no need to settle down
In the crippled crook of your earth bound town
And you've been down this road before
Which is not to say you're bored
Or that you shouldn't want for more
It's just your expectations should be lower
There must be somethin' more than this
More than ideal homes or domestic bliss
What is there left for you to do
'Cause you've seen the future and it's nothin' new
And you've been down this road before
Which is not to say you're bored
Or that you shouldn't want for more
It's just your expectations should be lower, should be lower
And you've been down this road before
Which is not to say you're bored
Or that you shouldn't want for more
It's just your expectations should be lower, should be lower
Apparently wasn’t happy with the text placement so had to repost it 🤣🤣🥹
His eyebrow slit and bear looking fucking clean
Also I hate everybody who lives close to Gent or Sheffield
Miles last night with chef Tom brown and Jay Forrester at the opening of Tom’s new oyster bar (pearly queen shoreditch/ where Tom and friends repeatedly posted that the logo outside is the new bat signal 🤨y’know like miles guitarist said that the mirrorball is their bat signal) (also the fact that Tom reposted the pic of them via puppetspaces ig)
instagram
The pictures of Miles with Tom and Jay
instagram
So proud of him selling out within less than two hours
instagram
Miles helping Tom with taste testing
instagram
I love that as soon Chef Tom Brown is involved everybody starts using Miles’ music; here a custom knife made for TB using troubled son
instagram
A nice recap of the opening night, the way Miles disappears in that hug with Tom is 🥹🥹🥹
#miles kane#Liam toon#okay I’m in love with that picture how adorable are they pls#also that poster for Japan looks absolute boss#I envy people who live in gent#08/11/2023#so proud of him#Instagram#also no darling I hate that he’s so self deprecating sometimes like darling believe me you could play Coachella (not sure if they’d let#you after the kiss cause homophobia) but if you ever return to Coachella it’s certainly gonna be as an artist and not as a crew member#who hurt Miles again#why is he always posting fucking sad songs 😭#what is he doing listening to this depressive music in the evening pls can we just all give him a massive hug
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
Spotlight
Characters: Albedo, Kazuha, Xiao, gn!reader
Word Count: 3,707
Warnings: Swearing
Premise: Modern AU in which the reader’s s/o is famous.
Author’s Note: My first crack at a modern AU and I enjoyed it immensely! My personal media of choice definitely came through in this prompt. I would now kill for Albedo to read Shakespeare. Also streamer Kazuha is an inspired idea, thank you anon for that! Not to mention musician Xiao, truly chef’s kiss.
Albedo
Albedo was a stage actor, both by education and by trade. Starting in high school he began in local productions, before entering into the Mondstadt Theateracademie. After appearing as Estragon in a filmed version of Waiting for Godot, he began to be scouted for various television miniseries, eventually becoming a well-respected film actor.
You arrived somewhere in the middle of his career. Working as a costume assistant at the Academie you had quickly fallen for the inquisitive and deceptively intense soul that exuded every color of emotion onstage, from raging anger to soft sorrow, before stepping into the wings and resuming an aura of utter calm. He had captivated you, both as an actor and as a human being; and when you learned that he had also become slightly infatuated with you, well, it was hard not to feel like you had stepped into a wonderful play, or perhaps simply a wonderful play had been brought to life.
The switch from theatre to screen was certainly a jarring one for both of you. When the first film contract was offered Albedo had stared at it for a long time, rereading it over and over again as the coffee in front of him quickly turned cold.
“Is there something wrong with the contract?” You had asked.
“No, it’s not that. It’s only…”
“Only?”
“Only on stage there is a single audience. You can feel their reactions, can measure their response. There is nothing nebulous about the people around you. But on film you cannot do that. You cannot adjust for time of day, or whether it’s a weekend or a Friday performance. You must let your lines out and hope that they land without even being able to calculate it.”
“It’s not a science experiment my darling,” you had teased.
“Maybe not,” Albedo admitted. Still he continued to read and reread, and it was only until the next afternoon that he had told you his answer.
Still, you had to admit that he made a fantastic actor. The naturally inward part of your partner’s personality, the part that always seemed to jump out the moment he left the stage, worked well to balance with the camera’s need for subtlety, unlike the projection required for stage plays. It was little surprise then that he should grow so popular. Despite all the worries about measuring audience response, there was no doubting the success of Albedo’s acting career.
Being a naturally withdrawn person Albedo mostly stayed off of social media. He had one private Instagram for friends – he didn’t post anything; one private Facebook for family – the only picture was one of you two in the mountains next to a particularly weird looking rock; and WhatsApp – which could barely be counted. Thus when he started blowing up on Twitter – a platform you had a mostly unused account on – the reaction was mostly one of “why are they talking about me?”
Not that Albedo minded fan enthusiasm, indeed when people started showing up in droves at the stage door for him he was always careful to thank everyone collectively and talk to as many people as possible, it just sort of confused him that so many people should take a vested interest in the actor and not just the character.
“It’s because they want to show you how wonderful they think your performances are,” you’d explained.
“I don’t have Twitter,” Albedo deadpanned.
Despite his protests though you sometimes caught him scrolling on your account, face slightly red at all the positive attention. His habit of internal self-deprecation had never truly gone away. That fact became slightly unfortunate in the face of hate comments. It was hard for Albedo not to take things personally. If someone said his acting was shit then you would catch Albedo reading the same line over and over again, as if to achieve mathematical perfection. It was a difficult urge to fight, and you were always careful to give Albedo plenty of reassurance when these things popped up, as well as surreptitiously blocking the trolls that wandered their way onto your dash.
This habit to take things at face value did not apply when you entered the mix. As far as Albedo was concerned you were his partner and no amount of complaining online would make him second guess that or second guess your worth. Even if you thought that you had a better hold on social media assholerly than he did Albedo would still make sure that for every hate comment that floated your way there were at least three compliments on his part. Mentioning you off-handedly in press interviews, saying that he had to go home to his partner, leaving small sketches on post-it notes scattered throughout your apartment, there were no lengths that Albedo wouldn’t go to assure you. And, if you had to admit, these things truly did make you feel better on the days when the small part of your brain said that this wasn’t mindless social media harassment.
Being an actor Albedo had an incredibly fine-tuned sense of the way that people responded to emotions, as if he were performing some grand sort of scientific experiment to see how many people he could sway with his gift. As of such he was always careful that, regardless of his success, things between you were never upturned. You were with him before he was really famous, and you would be there during and after. Albedo loved you deeply; though he often said that he hated romance plays for how sappy they were in his mind your relationship was the one, glowing exception – regardless of the other happy couples in the world. Though it was slightly idealistic, it was the kind of intensity that comprised Albedo’s personality, was the thing that had garnered him so much success.
Albedo loved you deeply, and no amount of surprise movie contracts would change that.
Kazuha
You had to admit that when you had met Kazuha you had no idea about his double life as a streamer. He was merely one of the many singers that came and went to the recording studios, all people eager to unleash their talent on the world. But unlike the rest of them, Kazuha could make you laugh.
Perhaps then it was unsurprising that Kazuha should be a popular streamer. Though his often florid talking style might seem on paper like it would be too grating for streaming, in reality his soft cadence combined with a dry sense of humor made him wildly popular. He rarely lost his temper, making him palatable to those who wanted to have a fun time without blowing their ears out, and when he did lose it his hyper-specific, often nonsensical insults were the stuff of memes. No, in retrospect it was not all that surprising that Kazuha was a beloved streamer.
At heart though, Kazuha had told you over coffee, the enthusiastic and earnest internet sensation was a poet.
“When you’ve had a life as dissonant as mine, how can you not be?” He’d joked. And indeed perhaps he was right, for Kazuha was as wonderful a poet as you had ever read. He was born to be a writer, you had told him.
You were also an aspiring singer, as well as a friend of the studio owner where you did your recordings. As such you had made it a habit to help around the studio when you weren’t also working or studying. As you and Kazuha were both students with intense side jobs, the good natured complaining of overworked students also made their way into you rapport, a friendship that grew day-by-day. Eventually it sprouted into love.
Though you knew that Kazuha was a streamer when your relationship started, in reality you hadn’t realized how truly popular he had become. The first time you watched one of his streams you were blown away by his popularity. Watching your first livestream only cemented that. It was hard to believe that your down-to-earth, slightly self-effacing, partner could have garnered such a large fanbase. Not that you didn’t think he deserved it. He absolutely did. However after seeing that you admitted you were a bit awestruck.
“Why? Am I not the same person on screen and off?”
“Of course you are! It’s just, well, my partner’s a celebrity!”
“I would go that far,” Kazuha laughed.
“Well you certainly are to me!”
Nevertheless your dynamic didn’t change much afterwards, besides the occasional teasing on both of your parts. Kazuha was after all Kazuha at the end of the day.
At the beginning Kazuha didn’t mention you much on stream, certainly not by name, you had to admit you were a bit intimidated by the idea of being recognizable on the internet, even if it was just by name.
“This is also my partner’s favorite map.” Had been his first mention, during a game of Mario Kart.
Despite this offhanded remark however the chat had almost immediately exploded, followed by the rest of the fanbase. Though there was, of course, some disappointed buzz – isn’t there always – the reaction was immensely positive. Positive, and curious.
After a while Kazuha started mentioning you more often in streams, especially after the two fo you moved in. Sometimes you would hear him as you passed him room – Kazuha liked to keep the door open – other times you would watch it on stream yourself.
“My partner hates this character. Too bad you can’t throw evidence.”
“Nobody tell my partner that I’m afraid of basements. I don’t need them to know that when laundry day rolls around.”
“Hey if you’re watching this dear, I promise that it’s not that much money. You don’t need to look at the bank account. Who am I kidding, this is why we don’t share one.”
“Hey, darling I know you’re watching this. Can you check and make sure I left my keys on the coffee table, they aren’t on my desk. Also can you make tea?”
Despite fans knowing very little about you, you were surprised by the amount of positive comments that flooded the streams. You had to admit that your initial expectations had been “people are going to find me annoying”. Instead funny comics of your voice drifting in from the other room popped up, along with a lot of waving and “tell your partner not to trust you with the keys” after Kazuha fell off a cliff one too many times. It was an odd experience, to be so happy about the comments of faceless people, people to whom you were also faceless.
Eventually Kazuha’s hardwork in singing paid off and his first single was recorded and given a deal. On the evening of the release livestream Kazuha set up in the living room, angling the camera so that you could sit on the chair just out of frame. You had talked about the release for months now, and a few weeks ago Kazuha had brought up the idea of a pseudo-stream reveal.
“I was wondering if you’d like to say hello to the audience or wave when my song is released. I understand that you’re hesitant about those sort of things, and I would never ask of you something that would make you uncomfortable. This relationship is the most precious thing to me, and I wouldn’t want you to feel pressured or exploited in any ways.”
“Thank you for being so considerate Kazuha. I’ll think about it.”
Now you sat in the chair, fidgeting slightly, waiting as the countdown on his laptop reached one. You excitement certainly seemed matched by that of the fans, who were typing wildly in the chat.
Eventually the screen faded to black and the chatting quieted down. The first few notes of a wooden flute emerged, combined with the strumming of a guitar. As the familiar words began to echo through the laptop speaker you found yourself washed away. Kazuha was always enthralling when he sang. At the end of the song was a dedication, and though Kazuha had already alluded to it, the sincerity still took your breath away.
To my dearest partner. My compass and my guiding star throughout this realization of my dream. You are my sun and my stars, and I’m forever devoted to you. Thank you for sharing in this project, and thank you for giving me such love.
Perhaps it was slightly saccharine. Regardless you felt the sudden, uninhibited urge to cry.
“So, what did everyone think?” Kazuha asked into the mic, face reappearing on screen. He was slightly giddy, and you watched as his hand tugged on the fabric of his linen belt.
Immediately the chat exploded, as waves of “that was amazing”, “I’m crying now”, and “the end was so sweet!” flooded the screen.
“Thank you all for the encouragement!” Kazuha let out a laugh, one that you could tell was one of utter euphoria, and no little relief. “There’s someone else I think who would like to thank you.”
Who knew that a small sentence could cause such a splash?
You barely had time to let out a tentative “Hello,” before an immediate wave of excited screaming covered the bottom left of Kazuha’s stream. “Thank you for supporting Kazuha’s song. And thank you for always being nice to me.” With a tentative wave of the hand you collapsed back on your chair, slightly hysterical laughter rising inside you out of the relief that flooded through you upon seeing the enthused fan reaction.
Afterwards your voice became the occasional guest on Kazuha’s streams, always greeted with enthusiasm. Kazuha continued to grow in popularity, and his music continued to capture a larger and larger audience.
All throughout this you never felt a snag in your relationship. Kazuha may have been a big streaming personality, but he was also a kind and considerate partner, the best that one could ask for in a significant other. Kazuha’s love was never in question. And neither was yours.
Xiao
Sometimes you were a little self-conscious about the way that you met Xiao.
Though Xiao had definitely grown a following by the time you met – being the main pianist for a popular singer and a classical pseudo-prodigy in both piano and flute his own right certainly had roped him an enthusiastic fanbase – you had simply known him as “the guy who hogs the practice room”.
“I swear to the gods, how long can that bastard take to practice!” You texted angrily at your friend one day. Qixing Conservatory was the premiere music place in Liyue, but what should’ve been an amazing opportunity was being overshadowed by a practice room partner who appeared to not have a life, one who also had the obnoxious habit of playing the same damn thing over, and over, and over again.
“Playing the same piece as before?”
“Yes! Ugh I don’t even know what it’s called but I’ve heard it enough times to last a lifetime, maybe five!”
“Damn I’m sorry, what time does he usually end?”
“I don’t even know. Some time in the early evening. It’s obviously never gotten through to his brain that other people also need to practice. Or that hearing the same notes over and over while waiting makes me want to chuck my binder against a wall.”
“Lol. I kinda want to hear it now. Can you send a video, will the sound pick up?”
“I don’t know how it wouldn’t.”
“…”
“Holy shit! Okay, I need you to watch this video and tell me if you recognize the pianist.”
Safe to say you nearly fell out of your chair upon figuring out Xiao’s identity. Not that you weren’t already about to out of pure exasperation. Still, there was something much more intimidating about shaming a successful musician, and you no longer had the urge to glare at Xiao every time he left the practice room. Honestly, you would have been perfectly happy keeping your head down and never interacting with him at all.
Fate, however, has a sense of humor.
To be fair, some of it was your fault. You knew that Erlkonig was a massively difficult piece. You knew that you should’ve picked something else, knew that even Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata mvt. Three had to be less painful than the non-vocal arrangement you’d placed in front of your eyes. You were never trusting your music taste with your piece choices again. This was a terrible mistake.
“These stupid fucking running notes!” You let out, a groan of exasperation racing through you. Half slamming (you weren’t crazy) the piano cover down you swung the door of the practice room open. You didn’t want to deal with this anymore. Trying to ignore the embarrassment that rose up seeing Xiao waiting on a chair next to the door you went to walk down the hallway.
“You should work on it with a dotted sixteenth note pattern.”
It was the first time that Xiao had ever spoken to you.
Afterwards a rapport slowly grew between the two of you. Often Xiao said nothing as you passed, rarely you made a gesture of recognition when he finally reappeared from the practice room. However soon the occasional word or phrase of advice grew into longer sentences, later these sentences evolved into pieces of conversation. Soon enough you discovered, to your slight horror, that you found yourself yearning for Xiao’s company.
Almost as soon as you’d finally figured out your feelings you were hit with a wave of denial. You weren’t falling for Xiao? How could you fall for someone who got on your nerves so much? Sure he gave you advice, but what about it? You deserved it after having to hear him over and over again while waiting. Certainly Xiao didn’t seem interested in you, he barely talked to you! Yeah he was getting more talkative, but it’s easier to talk to people when you’re giving them advice. There’s no way you were in love with Xiao. And there was no way he was in love with you.
To say that Xiao’s career as a musician, never mind his genuine technical talent at two instruments, was a barrier would be an understatement. The moment you thought you were making some progress, finally admitting to yourself that this crush was, in fact, real, a wave of anxiety would pass over you. Xiao was too good for you, he was too important. Here was a man who had a successful musical career already up in the air while you banged frustratedly on the keys. Why would someone that successful be interested in you? Not to mention the fact that he didn’t seem interested.
Because, you had to admit, you did like Xiao’s music. Not just his classical repertoire, but his pop music as well. It was slightly jazzy, mellow and playful and utterly unlike the scowling musician behind it – something you secretly thought extremely cute and surprisingly charming. To him you were just a practice roommate, and you were sure he’d find the idea of dating someone who was more familiar with his public persona irritating.
So you buried your feelings, or tried to. Unfortunately like sometimes attracts like, and just as Xiao secretly had the emotional understanding of a teaspoon, you weren’t nearly as clever about things as you would like.
“Is there something on my face?” Xiao asked, his voice gruff and slightly reluctant.
“No, why would there be?”
“Because you’re staring at it!”
“Oh, I’m sorry!” You let your head drop, looking intently at the ivories in front of you. Eventually there was a sigh.
“You don’t have to do that. I… I don’t mind.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes! You staring down is weird too. Let’s, let’s just hurry up and do this passage.”
After that you became more aware of your staring habit. You also became more aware of Xiao’s own habit, leaning towards you. Sometimes you swore that you could feel the tips of his hair tickling your neck, light and feathery and stealing all your attention.
“Hey, Xiao, do you need glasses?”
“Why would you asked that!” Xiao flared up, face reddening. By this time you’d become more accustomed to these flareups of grumpiness, and ignoring it you pressed on.
“It’s just, you seem to be leaning forward.”
“I’m not!” Immediately Xiao shifted back, almost stepping away. Without thinking about it you reached to grab his hand.
“I didn’t mean it was a bad thing!” You got out, before becoming aware of your hand grasping Xiao’s. The touch felt electric, and you were suddenly so very aware of everything, yet unable to focus at all.
“Then you shouldn’t have brought it up.”
“Sorry.”
“It’s fine.” Xiao grumbled.
Slowly the musician leaned closer to you once more. You had already half stood up and now you found yourself stepping closer to Xiao. The world continued to shrink until you were almost pressed together. Xiao was leaning forward, as were you, and the longer tufts of his hair were tickling your cheek, helped by the fan whirring away in the corner. Your hand was still in his, but all your thoughts appeared to have died away.
“Xiao?”
“Is this, too close?”
“No.”
“Oh.”
“Xiao?”
“What?”
“I like your music. I hope that doesn’t bother you.”
“Why would it?”
“I don’t know. I just, I also like you, not just your music. But I also like your music.”
“I also like yours too.”
Perhaps it wasn’t the most romantic of confessions, but at that point you were far too carried away by the moment, or maybe by the fact that was the most sentences Xiao had strung together that weren’t about triplets. Regardless of the fact, you were suddenly seized by incredible happiness, as all appeared to right itself.
Afterwards initially little changed, Xiao was a gruff as ever, you were still itching to play in the practice room more. Nevertheless when you went to a concert of his for the first time and he let out a small, almost imperceptible, smile your way you knew things had changed. They would keep changing perhaps, or maybe they wouldn’t. After all, this moment was beautiful.
So much that you didn’t even mind the hours spent waiting for the practice room.
#genshin impact#albedo x reader#kazuha x reader#xiao x reader#genshin albedo#genshin kazuha#genshin xiao#genshin impact fanfiction#requested#my writing#scenarios
210 notes
·
View notes
Note
Komaeda fluff alphabet?
//our best hope boy!!
------------------------------------------------
Nagito Komaeda Fluff Alphabet
A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?
Nagito loves to spend his free time following you around like a lost puppy, finding everything you do so amazing. Though, if you let him choose what you two do that day, he would shyly ask if you two could cuddle. “I know someone like me should touch such a beautiful person like you, but I would like to be selfish...just this once, please.”
B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?
He could never find a flaw in you. You’re absolutely perfect in his eyes. But he loves how well you listen to him and his little hope rants. He finds it so endearing that you like listening to what he has to say.
C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?
Comforting isn’t something he finds easy, but he’ll try his hardest to comfort you. He’d wrap his green jacket around your shoulders, pulling you into his slim chest as he presses small kisses to your tear stained cheeks. Your happiness is so important to him, so he’ll do anything just to see you smile again.
D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?
He dreams to marry his S/O, but he feels like he’s not good enough. He wants to be able to have a very small family, but he feels like his luck would turn on him and he’ll lose everything dear to him. You’d have to reassure him that you’ll never go away.
E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?
He’s extremely passive, letting you be the dominant in the relationship. Everything goes at your pace. If you’re comfortable, that’s when he’s happiest. Sometimes he’ll chip in some ideas on your next date or what not, but he’s not expecting you to listen to someone like him.
F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?
Nagito hates fighting with you and will do everything to avoid it. You two almost never get into arguments, but if they do happen, it’s usually from you telling him off about not appreciating himself more. You’ll have to shower him in the compliments he deserves and he’ll apologize and thank you for your utter kindness.
G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?
He’s unbelievably grateful for you and will constantly tell you so. He’ll tell you how much he appreciates everything you do, even if you just gave him half of your cookie. He loves everything you do for him, and he’ll return the favour as soon as possible.
H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?
He’s very open about himself and he has little to nothing to hide from you. He trusts you with his life, so he will tell you everything about himself. He doesn’t expect you to do the same, though. He wants you to be comfortable with him, and he feels like forcing you to open up to him would ruin that.
I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?
You’ve helped him out of the self-deprecation habit he had. He does it so much less, and now he’s starting to believe every little compliment you give him. He returns it by giving you even more compliments, and how amazing you truly are.
J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?
As much as he hates it, he’s a bit selfish over you. He gets very jealous very quickly whenever someone flirts with you. He doesn’t do anything directly, but once you two get home, he’d wrap himself around you and press small kisses to your cheek and neck. He’d apologize for being so needy, but he needs to be reassured that you’re only his.
K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?
He’s a very gentle kisser, almost like he doesn’t want to ruin your perfect skin. He’d take your chin into his hand, tilting it upwards as he’d press his lips to yours. He gets very shy once he pulls away, apologizing for tainting you with his lips. You’ve have to shut him up by grabbing him by his hair and pulling him down for another kiss.
L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?
He’d be the one to confess to you first, but he’d feel super guilty about it. “Trash like me shouldn’t be able to even think this way about someone as amazing as you...” Just tell him to shut up and accept his confession before he goes on a crazy rant.
M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?
Absolutely! But he feels so scared that his luck might mess it up. He already lost the ring twice, so he had to propose as soon as he got the third one. To be honest, he would be the one to elope rather than to have a big wedding. He doesn’t want his luck to mess up such a beautiful day for you.
N icknames - What do they call their s/o?
You’re always going to be his hope. He would also call you by your first name in more intimate moments, but both in private and in public, you’re his darling hope.
O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?
He loves physical affection, so he would wrap you in his arms as he says he loves you over and over again as he peppers your face in soft, fleeting kisses. Tell him you love him too!! He’ll be over the moon!
P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?
He doesn’t give a damn on whos watching you two, and to be honest, he wouldn’t notice. He’ll never ever lay a hand on you without your permission, so you would have to initiate public kisses or hugs. He loves them to death though.
Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.
Nagito is fantastic at giving you huge confidence boosts. He’ll compliment you everywhere and anywhere. He’ll tell you that you look stunning right in front of his friends, or how much he loves you when you two are alone. He sees no flaw in his hope.
R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?
He loves cliché, but sometimes it doesn’t work out so well for him. He’d bring you flowers, just for them to die the next day. He tries his hardest to be romantic though, but his luck always gets in the way. But the one thing that never fails, is an at home movie. But sometimes his luck ends up picking out a crappy movie, but it ends up in giggles as you two watch it.
S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?
Absolutely. If you want something, he’s going to do everything to get it for you. He supports all of your goals, no matter how out there they are. He knows that you know what’s best for you. When you do reach your goal, he gets an overwhelming sense of hope and happiness in his soul when he sees you so happy.
T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?
Not entirely. He would do whatever you do, so if you want a bit of thrill in your relationship, he’ll be on board the entire time.
U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?
Nagito almost knows you too well. He knows when you’re feeling upset or angry, and he would do everything in his power to help you get through it. He’s very empathetic to you, so he lets you rant to him, and he’ll let you in on how he was able to figure out the problem.
V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?
He values you more than his own life. Nothing in this world can ever be better than you, and he makes it known. His constant self-deprecation rants on how you’re so much better than him, and how you deserve the world is a regular for him.
W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.
When he’s sleepy, he’ll decide that he’ll be a little greedy. He pulls himself into your chest, his cheek resting on your collarbone as he has a small smile on his face. He wouldn’t say much, looking up at you with pure adoration in his eyes.
X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?
He adores your affection. Sometimes, he likes to lay his head on your lap as you play with his hair. It makes him fall asleep in no time. Make sure not to move too much, though. He’s a very light sleeper.
Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?
Nagito is very needy, so he would go around Hajime and bother him for the entire time your gone. You’re never off of his mind, nor his conversation. Once you come back, Hajime would be thanking you as Nagito clings himself to you.
Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship? If so, what kind of?
You’re Nagito’s one and only, he’ll do absolutely anything for you if you asked. You’re his lifeline, you keep him stable.
#danganronpa#danganronpa x reader#nagito komaeda#nagito x reader#dr2#goodbye despair#mod oma#fluff alphabet
155 notes
·
View notes
Note
would it be ok to ask for hcs of the main 6 + vaderwood and how they would react to their normally energetic and funny mc being a little off and making some self-deprecating jokes (like a little too dark to be funny) as a way of coping and hiding their anxiety/depression? if not thats ok im just in a similar mood today.
self-deprecating jokes are my thing too, tbh. hope you’re feeling better! Also, I couldn’t picture Vandy for this particular hc, I’m sorry :c
Yoosung
This boy honestly loves how fun you are. He will always laugh with you and you don’t tease him that much (Saeyoung does that for you)
One day, when he comes home from his job at the vet, he finds you calling for pizza. He lets you finish the call and then you look up.
“Hey, welcome back! I accidentally left the stove on for too long and messed up dinner” you casually said, with a small giggle. “So I called Pizza Hut, hope it’s okay”.
“It’s okay!” he says. “I love pizza”
“I know, me too” you smile. You stand up and stretch your arms. “Okay, so I’ll take a shower before it gets here. How the fuck did I forget the stove on, I don’t know” you laugh. “I swear to God I would totally leave me at this point”.
Yoosung says nothing, shocked. He watches you walk to the bathroom and turn on the shower. He knows you like to joke around, but that joke had been pretty specific. Leave you? Why would he leave you? Over some burnt food?!
He waits until you come out, wrapped in a towel and hands you a cup of your favourite tea. You smile weakly.
“An award for my awful cooking?” you tease him.
“Hey! It’s just food! And you solved it. I don’t really care, MC, please let it go”. He sees your lips tremble a little bit. “Are you okay?”
You had a really rough day at work. You tell him all about it while sipping on the tea and he silently listens to you, nodding at the right times. The pizza finally arrives and he puts on your favourite show so you both can watch it. When you go to bed, he makes sure to give you extra cuddles, so you never have to feel any more pressure on yourself.
Zen
Honestly, he’s not the best at comedy. But he really likes how much you can make yourself laugh with your own jokes.
He comes home and hands you his tablet. You arch an eyebrow and look at him from the couch. He sits beside you and asks you to press play. You nod and comply his request.
It’s a video from rehearsal. He’s singing at he’s actually hitting all the notes just right. You smile softly, watching the video in silence. When it’s over, you turn and gives him a kiss on the cheek.
“You’re amazing, babe. You did the song soooo good! How can you be so talented?”
“Thank you, babe. And I don’t know, can’t help it. I’m just talented.” he shrugs, with a confident smile.
“Well, someone has to be” you responded quickly. His smiled faltered and he looked at you, confused.
“What are you talking about? You are talented too. I’ve seen your drawings, those building projects you have been working on. They’re masterpieces, MC, I love them and–”
“I didn’t get the job, Zen” you quickly answer, not looking at him. “They didn’t like those ‘masterpieces’” you added, making the colons signs with his fingers.
Oh. So they had already sent you the email.
Zen would put the tablet aside and hold you on the couch. Whisper over and over again how talented you truly are and how they were in the wrong for not noticing it.
“If they can’t see how brilliant you are, why would you want to work for them?” he asked. “I’ve been rejected more times that I can count. I know how you feel. And you know what makes me feel better?”
You look at him and shake your head.
Ten minutes later, you’re both riding on his motorcycle, feeling the air against your face. you hug him tighter and smile.
Jaehee
Jaehee’s not one for jokes. But she does enjoy the occasional laugh she has with you. You make tons of jokes, but, unlike Saeyoung, you know when to stop
“Babyyyyyyyy, I’m a mess!” you complained, stretching on your bed. Both of you were working on your laptops, when suddenly you put yours aside.
“C’mon. Help me, Excel Goddess! Can’t seem to make this thing to work and I need to show it to my boss tomorrow” you asked. Jaehee smiled softly, put her laptop aside and grabbed yours. She started typing formulas, fixing your work.
“You’re so good to me, baby. Thank youuuu. That’s why you’re the smart one here”. Jaehee just smiled, continuing her work.
“They should have taught me Excel in school instead of sports. Did anyone of my class turn out to be an athlete? No one. Are we struggling to get a job because we don’t know shit about Excel? We are”.
“Maybe that’s why I’m failing. Maybe that’s why I had to settle with this shitty job, because I can’t comprehend the monster that in Microsoft Excel. Maybe that’s also why my Computer Science teacher hated me at school” you said dramatically. Jaehee chuckled softly.
“Maybe that’s why my whole life is a mess right now. Maybe that’s why I can’t find joy in the things I do anymore, maybe that’s why my father left us. Because I’m a shitty person who can’t do Excel and can’t get a decent job”.
She stopped typing and looked over at you.
“MC. What are you saying?”
“I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m tired. Don’t think about it too much”
“I-… Do you want me to talk to Mr. Han? Maybe there’s a position and… I know C&R takes most of my time but an entry level job may be good– at least for your resumé and–”
“I’m fine. Don’t think about it, baby” you dismissed, but Jaehee grabbed your hand.
“Can’t you really find joy anymore?” she asked. You sighed.
“Happens to me when the cold weather beggins. Will go away in a couple of weeks” you shrugged. Jaehee squeezed your hand.
“Let me know if I can do anything to help you… well, find joy again”.
“You do help!” you assured her. “I can find bits of joy here” you smiled and gave her a small kiss. She smiled and kissed you back.
Jumin
Jumin doesn’t understand most of your jokes. Most of the times, you have to explain them to him. He doesn’t mind, but it’s only because he really enjoys watching you laugh at your own jokes. The sight of you giggling it’s enough to light up any day.
That day, you decided to visit him during lunch. Which wasn’t a rare occurrence, you tried to visit him at least once a week, making sure with Jaehee you wouldn’t be interrupting.
“Good afternoon, my love. Didn’t expect you here” he greeted you, giving your cheek a tender kiss when you approached him. You gave him the bento you had prepared and sat in front of him, on the other side of his desk.
“I know. I just thought your darling, loving wife might make an appearence. I do have to keep those heiresses away from you” you laughed. He smiled softly and opened his bento. “Don’t want them making you change your mind about marrying some poor girl who couldn’t even afford university by herself”.
Jumin arched his eyebrow while eating his lunch. “Is there a problem with your classes? I thought you were excited about finally attending university, even if most of the classes are online for security reasons. Are the professors not competent enough? Are they not grading you fairly?”
You laughed. “No, Jumin, classes are fine. I just… Don’t really fit with your social class, you know. I mean, I knew I wouldn’t fit, but someday’s it really… just… I don’t know. You can put a working class girl in a Channel, but you can’t really change who she really is inside, right?” you smiled weakly.
Jumin furrowed his eyebrows, visibly upset. “What are you talking about?”
Your facade disappear and you sighed. You reached out for his hand and held it tighly.
“Please, don’t misunderstand me. I love you, I really do. Nothing can change that. But I can’t– I can’t pretend I don’t hear the whispers when I come here to have lunch with you. How I listen to them mocking these nice clothes you bought for me” you said, pointing at your light blue dress he had given you. “I don’t… I didn’t grow up with these things. I must look really dumb pretending to be part of a class I���m not”.
“Who made that comment?” he asks, angrily.
You try to cover it up, but after some pushing, you tell him it’s the secretary that works two offices away. She has a desk beside Jaehee’s. Jumin stands up, not stopping when you ask him to. He takes one step outside his office and spots the secretary you must be talking about.
“You’re fired. Assistant Kang, take care of that paperwork”.
Jumin returned to his office and locked the door. You can’t believe what just happened. He walks over to you and lifts up your chin with his hand, gently.
“Don’t ever let anyone tell you you don’t belong here. Or that you don’t deserve elegant clothes or anything I want to give to you. I know you didn’t grow up the same as me, but that’s why I love you. Because you didn’t look at me and saw my money or C&R, you looked at me. At who I was. Who I could be. I want to be the best man I can be, just for you. And I want to please you, giving you anything I can so you can enjoy life at its fullest. Also, look at you” he said, taking a look at your whole outfit. “You look breathtaking. You look classy, and it’s not just the dress” he smirked, kissing your cheek and making his way to your neck, leaving you a mess of giggles.
Saeyoung
Ok, so we all agree he’s the king of dark humour and self-deprecating jokes.
And he’s used to be like that around you and sometimes you make the same jokes and you both just laugh it out.
So that day, he doesn’t notice something’s off from the start.
He’s fixing the robot cat, since it had been malfunctioning. You’re reading a magazine on the couch while he’s sitting on the floor, both of you talking on and off.
“One day you should teach me who to do that. You know, fixing stuff and such”
“I wil! But you’ll need to call me sensei during our lessons.”
“Sensei? Isn’t that japanese?”
“It is! I’ll be your sensei if you wish. But what do you want to learn to fix?”
“I don’t know. I just don’t want to be the dumb one of the relationship”
“Awww. But we make such a good pair~”
“Just because you haven’t got tired of me yet” you chuckle.
“How could I get tired of your cooking? Never!~ I swear my mouth waters just thinking about your waffles.”
You laugh. “That’s all I am? My cooking?”
“Well, also how clean you keep this, Ms. Vanderwood hasn’t been complaining as much as before” he teases you.
“Well, you know I have to keep this apartment clean and your stomach full. That’s why I’m here, right? Until you get tired of my stupidness” you chuckle.
Saeyoung looks back at you, stopping on his fixing of robo-cat. He’s not longer smiling.
“… You really think that? That I think you’re stupid?”
“Well… I’m no genius. I’m just one more secretary, I’m… c’mon. You’d have more fun with someone who’s just as smart as you. I’m just here… until my time’s done. I’ve accepted it long ago.”
Suddenly he’s over you, making you lay on the couch, pinning both your arms over your head.
“Stop! What? Stop, just stop, what are you even saying?! You are kind, compassionate, generous and the most beautiful soul I’ve ever seen. You stayed by my side when I was at my worst. You saw all parts of me and still loved me. I’m the one who isn’t worthy of someone as loving and forgiving as you. I– I could never. I could have never rescued Saeran without you. I could have never been happy or even think about real happiness if it weren’t for you. So honestly, what if you don’t know anything about computers or hacking? That doesn’t matter to me. It’s you and your heart. It’s always been about your loving heart, MC. Please, please don’t be so hard on yourself. I’ve loved you my whole life. Even before I met you. I just didn’t realize it.”
Your eyes water
damn, saeyoung i almost cried as well, you fucker
You both stay on the couch, holding each other until you fall asleep. He keeps whispering soft and warm words to your ear every now and then, making sure you never doubt yourself again.
Saeran
“i want to die” “same”
It’s so usual for you both to make dark jokes, he doesn’t really notice when it stops being a joke to you.
You’re both laying on the couch. You’re on top of him, resting your head on his chest. You can’t remember how it started, but you start joking around.
“Your girlfriend’s a mess, you know”
“She is. Have you seen her hair?” he teased.
“What the hell does she think she’s doing? Have you seen the way she dresses?”
“Total mishap. It’s like a match made in hell”
“And her voice? More like a screech” you laugh, making fun of your own voice.
“Will she ever shut up?” he sighed dramatically, smirking softly.
“Why does she think she actually make someone happy?” you chuckle. His smile disappears.
Saeran stays silent for a minute. “You’re not happy?”
are you not happy with him? has he already bored you out of your mind? are you having second thoughts about your relationship? because he’s been trying, he’s been seeing a psychologist and even though there still isn’t a big change, he— is it because there hasn’t been a big change?
“Well, you’re not” you replied in a small voice. “And I can’t– And I don’t how– Maybe it’s me?”
So, Saeran decides to try something he’s been talking about with his psychologist. Better now than ever, he thought.
“I love you”
You raise your head, looking at him in disbelief. He’s never said that before. When you started dating, he had kissed you and you had understood how it was hard for him to express feelings due to the severe trauma he had gone through, so you hadn’t pushed him but… Saeran was still looking at you, a tense expression on his face. You suddenly realized you hadn’t said anything back.
“I love you too”. You had said it before. You had told him that a million times, but it was the first time you said it back.
“I know it seems I’m not making progress– But I think I am? I mean, I just told you that, right?” he said, scratching his head, a little nervous. “He said we were going to work on expressing feelings, and it was easier to express the most intense ones.”
“Your most intense feeling– one of your most intense feelings is loving me?” you asked, still surprised.
“Shut up” he said, making you laugh for real this time.
#mystic messenger#mystic messenger headcanons#mystic messenger headcanon#mysme hc#mystic messenger hc#mm hc#mm jumin#mm zen#mm jaehee#mm yoosung#mm saeyoung#i've lost my ability to make small hcs#this turned out to be seven pages on a google doc#SEVEN#will i ever make small hcs again#idk
513 notes
·
View notes
Text
Adore You
A/N: Wow, this is my first request and I really liked it. Sorry it took me a while to get written, it’s been a wild week, as I’m sure you all know. To @marvel-madness, I hope this is close to what you wanted, I’m sorry if it’s not perfect. Also, tagging is being weird so I hope this works.
Genre: fluff and like, a smidge of angst that’s hardly angst
Warning: uhh, none
Word count: 1500
Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x fem reader
Summary: You’re weird and afraid Loki hates you.
Request: marvel-madness asked:
Hi I read your marvel fanfics and I love it!! Could u do a fanfic where reader is like super quirky and tries to get to know Loki but he’s a bit cold and she feels that he hates her. And one day she confronts him crying and he’s all like I love you and I felt someone perfect like you wouldn’t want to be with me. Love your works and hope you’re having a good day :)
Masterlist
You’re weird. Even if you didn’t have superpowers, you would be weird, and that never bothered you. Until now, it seems. You have always been okay with being the strange girl, because anyone who thinks that’s a bad thing isn’t worth your time.
But then you met Loki. You greeted him in all of his stoic glory and were immediately drawn to him. Wanda later let you know you had gone a little doe-eyed upon meeting him. However, as warm and welcoming as you tried to be, he never looked at you with anything better than indifference. Worse than that, you often felt as though he judged you for the way you acted and dressed. You know your social skills aren’t exactly the norm, but you don’t think you’re terrible. And maybe your style is a little eccentric, but it makes you happy.
You have spent your whole life ignoring judging looks and funny stares from those around you, and that was okay because they were just people who thought they were better than you. But now, the man you’ve been fascinated by since you met him seems to look at you the same way. And now, it breaks through the armor you had built up in childhood. It hits you right in the chest to see what you’re sure is judgment reflected in his gaze.
A few days into Loki joining the team in the tower, Thor assures you that his brother is always like that. He tells you not to take it personally. Thor is a sweet man (god?) and you think that if Loki cares so deeply for someone so much his opposite, then maybe he’s just hiding a kindness. You decide you need to get over your fear and possible prejudices and make it your mission to get to know him.
You begin by joining him on the couch as he sits alone reading. He has found a common area most of the rest of the team avoids, but that you happen to frequent for the peacefulness. As you sit a seat away from him, jostling him in the process, he glances at you from the corner of his eye. You can’t be sure that’s a look of judgment, but it resembles many a side-eye you’ve gotten in your life. You shake the feeling off and push forward.
“What are you doing?” you ask, chipper and enthusiastic.
“Reading,” he responds shortly, briefly looking in your direction.
After a moment, you continue. “What are you reading?”
“A book.”
There is an awkward pause where you had hoped he might continue talking, but he doesn’t and you have to keep trying. “So, how has your time here been so far?”
“Fine.” This time, he doesn’t even look away from the page. Your shoulders sag, seeing how obviously he doesn’t want to speak to you. You give a quiet goodbye before trudging out of the room.
--
It’s really okay that he doesn’t like you, but does he have to look at you like that? You hadn’t noticed originally, but a few weeks after his arrival, you could feel eyes on you. You casually glanced around, only to find Loki looking at you, stone faced. You had blushed in confusion before quickly looking away.
But he keeps doing it. Sometimes you’ll just be wandering around the tower in some strange and unmatching outfit, and you will be able to feel that sensation of someone watching you. Almost every time, he’s the only one in the room. It would feel flattering if his look came with the heat that people always describe in romance. He doesn’t look at you like he wants you, though. He looks at you almost in complete indifference. Maybe if you were trained like Natasha, you would be able to read more into it, but all you can see is the exact same stare you had gotten all throughout your adolescence, riddled with condescension and judgment. It could have just been the fact that he was raised a prince that made it feel like he was always looking down his nose at you, but a lifetime of being a target of mockery and ostracism could really shake one’s confidence.
You know you talk a lot about strange things, your laugh is weird, and on and on. But why does he have to watch you as though he’s waiting for you to make a fool of yourself? Why does he hate you without even knowing you?
--
Your worries are interrupting your sleep schedule. You’re too anxious and wrapped up in your fears to sleep, so you go to your favorite lounge. You like it because whoever designed it hadn’t felt the need to add a TV or any fancy technology. It’s just some big and comfortable couches with a great view. You stare numbly into the lights of New York. At least in the dark, no one is there to think you odd.
Of course, you have to think something like that. Moments later, you hear steps coming towards you. You look over your shoulder to see the God of Mischief himself walking into the room, seemingly unaware of your presence. He walks around the couch to sit down, only to finally notice you as he settles in. The book in his hands closes as though you startle him.
“Oh, hello,” he greets quietly.
You’re a nice person, but you’ve lost a lot of sleep over this man, and you can’t hold in the huff of frustration at his words. He quirks a brow at you. “Have I done something?”
You realize as soon as he asks that you should have left when he entered the room. You’re a lot less nice when you’re tired, sure. Unfortunately, you’re also much more emotional. You are reminded of this when you immediately feel your eyes sting at his words. You try your hardest to hold the tears in, but your sniffle gives you away. His eyes widen momentarily and he scoots slightly closer to you on the couch.
“Why do you hate me?” you ask, your voice obviously choked up. You train your eyes on the city lights once more, afraid to see disdain in his eyes.
“Hate you?” He genuinely seems confused by your question, and that somehow makes it so much worse. Without warning, your face scrunches up and your tears fall, out of your control. If you were to look at him, you would see the frantic concern on his face now, more emotion than you’ve ever seen.
“I was so excited to meet you. I wanted to get to know you and maybe be friends or something, but you didn’t want that. I tried to be nice, but you hated me no matter what. I know I can be to excitable and clingy, but I wasn’t even that bad! And then you look at me like my presence is offensive. Please don’t hate me for being weird, I’m sorry, I’ll be better, I swear.” The exhaustion is surely the reason for your lack of filter. While you speak, you tuck your knees to your chest and hug them. Somehow, every insecurity you had ever had in a friendship or relationship leaks into this conversation. You bury your face in your knees in shame at your outburst.
You’re startled to feel a cold hand on your arm. You look up quickly into his eyes to see him looking at you earnestly. “My dear, you are absolutely perfect the way you are, I don’t want you to change.” A small, almost bashful, smile appears. “I swear on my life I do not hate you.”
You wipe your nose in the most un-ladylike way, keeping your eyes glued to him. “You don’t?”
He shakes his head slightly. “Darling, I adore you.”
You’re sure you’ve never felt more like a deer in the headlights. “You what?”
He looks down at his hands, which you now see are fiddling with his book. “I adore you. You’re lovely and energetic, you light up a room with your smile, and to top it all off, you were kind to me from the moment I got here. I was quite taken with you. I hoped to hide that by seeming unaffected by you, but my intentions were not to make you feel bad about yourself.”
“Then why…?” you trail off.
He lets out a self-deprecating chuckle. “I didn’t want to fool myself into believing myself worthy of someone as wonderful as you. You could do much better.”
You don’t speak for a long time, shocked to your core. He adores me. His eyes never leave his book as you appraise him. You can see in the hunch of his shoulders that he is preparing for rejection. In a split-second of courage, you set your hand on top of his, stopping it from messing with the book cover. When he doesn’t pull away, you let out a shaky breath and intertwine your fingers with his. He watches in fascination, and you can feel a grin overtake your face.
“Will you tell me about what you’re reading now?” As he finally meets your eyes with a small smile, his expression can only be described as adoration.
#loki x reader#loki x you#Loki Laufeyson#Loki Friggason#loki odinson#Loki Laufeyson x Reader#loki x y/n#fem reader#reader insert#imagine#fanfic#fanfiction#marvel#avengers#lonelyandlovelorn#request#adore you
231 notes
·
View notes
Note
Hiya! I was wondering if you could do headcanons with the main 6 who has a m!mc who usually is very fun, happy, boisterous, etc. But, one day they find m!mc sobbing and come clean about how he tries to keep all his negative emotions inside because he hates feeling like a burden and is actually very insecure about himself and believes deep down that he isn’t good enough for them.
Warnings: self deprecation, might be triggering
Unfortunately I could find any gifs that suited the context, but I'll do my best with the writing part.
Enjoy 💕
How would the main 6 react to you being secretly insecure (Headcanon)
Asra
🔮 Asra is constantly out of the shop. Helping other people, looking for new ingredients or cleaning someone else's mess. He told you that he would be out for the day, and would only return at dawn. He kissed you goodbye and went on his way.
🔮 When he arrived at his destination, the problem was already solved, so he turned back and went to the shop, several hours earlier than you expected. He decided to make it a surprise, so he snuck from the back and saw you sitting on the floor with your back turned to him. He tiptoed to you and gave you a big scare. When you turned around, face swollen, nose red and teary eyes, he thought it was his fault.
🔮 He instantly pulled you to his lap wrapping your body with his arms and asked you what was wrong, what happened and who made you cry. It took you some time to actually stop crying and tell him that you were the problem.
🔮 He held your face and looked deep into your eyes before saying "You're the most precious boy I've ever met. You don't have to be happy all the time, especially around me. You can always be yourself here. I love you no matter what".
🔮 He just holds you for a while, stroking you back gently and rocking both of your bodies in a calm motion. He also gives you a peck on top of your head from time to time.
🔮 Faust slithers in into the hug and curls around your head and licks your face playfully saying things like "Friend cute", "Friend nice", "Friend worthy", "I love friend!"
Nadia
👑 She was going to be solving some issues with the courtiers the whole day and kissed you goodbye early in the morning. You decided to stay in your shared bedroom and just lazy around.
👑 After sometime laying down, you got bored and decided to explore the huge castle a little. Strolling down the halls, you heard two servants talking and couldn't help but to listen to their conversation. "Have you seen the countess's new boyfriend?" "I did actually, didn't know she would settle for so little" "I know, right? Count Lucio was way hotter" "Certainly".
👑 That broke you. You already had some issues about self-acceptance and feeling relevant close to Nadia, but knowing other people also thought you weren't suitable enough, crushed you even more.
👑 You ran back to your room and took your clothes off, sinking in the bathtub right after. You felt the tears coming and soon, dark and judging thoughts came to you.
👑 Nadia arrived a few minutes later expecting to see your bubbly self as usual, but got shocked by seeing you sobbing in the bathtub. She immediately rushed to you and asked you what happened. After telling her, rage took over her face and she assured you that those two servants would be fired right away.
👑 She joined you in the bath and pulled you to her chest. "Darling, do not pay attention to those fools. I only hear good things from the other servants about you. How polite, caring and what a good and lovely person you are. And I agree with them. My position as Countess does not make more of a person that anyone. You are amazing and I love you dearly"
Julian
♟ Julian decided to take you to Mazelinka's place to have dinner. You, Julian and Portia were knocking at her door as soon as the sun feel on the horizon.
♟ You had a nice dinner, laughed, danced, talked, sang and everything was fine until you felt like a spectator before the whole scene. You saw their happiness and joy and started to feel like you would never be able to truly have all that.
♟ You excused yourself quickly, and proceeded to rush out of the house, leaving everyone very confused. You never did that before and at first they didn't know how to react, that's until Portia smacked Julian's head and told him to hurry after you, which he did almost instantly.
♟ He found you in a alley siting on a fetal position, crying your eyes out, and that hurt him deep. He kneeled to your level and pulled you to his chest, wrapping his very long arms around your torso. He didn't exactly know what to say except for "Just let it all out, sweetheart"
♟ After some minutes, he asked you what was wrong and you told him about your insecurities. You were surprised when he let out a small chuckle "You have no idea how much I love you, do you? I would never leave you for any other man. You're the one that I want to spend the rest of my days with. You're the most perfect creature I've ever met and I regret many things on my life, many horrible decisions, really, but being with you...was the best choice anyone could ever make. And I'm glad you choose me too".
♟You went back to the house and both women hugged you tightly. Mazelinka told you to sit your butt down while she made you some special soup. Portia also decided to help and brought you a warm blanket. You couldn't help but to feel accepted by your new family.
Muriel
🌿 Muriel was out in the woods to collect some wood for the winter. He left you with Inanna saying that you couldn't protect yourself, so you needed the wolf's help. You agreed and Inanna stayed behind to make you some make you company and keep you safe.
🌿 You then proceeded to look around at the hut. There were new things there. More blankets, more food, more pillows, more clothes, more carved animals Muriel made just for you and the place was way more organized.
🌿 You stared to tear up at the sight of all that. He spent so much time and effort in you. Always trying to please you in all ways. You felt tears running down your cheeks and Inanna came close to you, licking your face. You started crying even more, not knowing why she liked you so much. You hugged her and cried as she buried her head on your shoulder.
🌿 Muriel entered and, looking at the scenario, dropped all the wood. His eyes were wide at the sight of you crying and at first he though you were hurt. He rushed to you and Inanna gave you both some space. After analyzing your whole body and not finding any injuries he got confused. "Honey...what's wrong?"
🌿 You fully opened your heart to him and told him everything. How you thought he spent to much time looking after you, doing things to you, getting you supplies, and you know how he liked being alone, which made things worse to you, because you felt like a burden to him.
🌿 He looked dead serious into your eyes, blushing a little "I...like you here. And I don't mind doing things for you. It's like having a prince at my hut. You bring happiness to the woods. Inanna likes you. And I like you too. I...I love you" he took a flower crown out of his cloak "and you deserve nice things".
Portia
🐈 She had many plans for both of you today. You were going flower picking, you would have a picnic, swim at the lake and watch the fireflies. After all, she would be released of her duties earlier today. A little "prize" Nadia gave Portia once in a month for her hard work. She would only have to help with breakfast and lunch and then she was free to go.
🐈 You, on the other hand, stayed in your cabin and decided to take a look around. Accidentally, you found her plans for the day. She planned so many things, all for you to spend more time together. All of your bad thoughts came in mind and you started to feel the tears come.
🐈 They usually said that you weren't good enough for her. While she worked at the palace you simply helped with small tasks in the shop. You felt completely useless and disposable. She didn't need you. At all.
🐈 When she came back, she was surprised to see the house so quiet, since you usually greeted her with a big smile and a warm hug. She though you were playing with her and tiptoed around the house to find you, until there was only one place left to look. The bedroom.
🐈 She opened the door on a fast movement and screamed to scare you, which actually happened. But seeing you face filled with tears, she instantly felt guilted and rushed to your side, rubbing your head and pulling you to a hug. She asked you why were you were sad and you explained it all to her.
🐈 She grabbed your face with her chubby hands "Look here, young man, I'm with you for a reason! Your stunning looks are just a bonus. I love for your heart. And you're definitely not useless. How cool is it that I have a magician boyfriend? That's totally something to brag about".
Lucio
🐐 Lucio was throwing one of his big parties again. He choose your outfit, just like everything else you were wearing. He sprayed you with compliments as you were both standing in front of the mirror.
🐐 You went down to the ballroom, his arm around your waist, and people began whispering. Some of them looked happy for you, other feared for you and a few of them looked extremely jealous. Still, you felt uncomfortable and unconfident with the whole situation.
🐐 The party went by and you chatted with some friends you made within the palace. Most of them were servants, but that didn't matter to you. They were nice people and you really liked them. You were talking to one of the bakers when his glance went form your face to something happening behind you.
🐐 You turned around to see a very embarrassing scene for you. Another man, throwing himself on Lucio's lap, his hand rubbing his chest. You excused yourself from the conversation and rushed to the master bedroom. You threw your coat on the floor and went to the veranda to get some fresh air, involuntary tears running down your face.
🐐 Quick and heavy footsteps were heard from the hallway and Lucio bursted into the room, looking for you. Once he found you on the veranda and saw your crying face, he pulled you close by your waist. You couldn't help but burst out all the things that were bothering you on him. Your fears, insecurities, everything.
🐐 "I've never met that man in my life, but I know he's not even worthy of being close to you. You are better than any of those fools. Not because your a Count, but because of your heart. You learned to love and accept me after everything I did and because of that, you would certainly win the prize of "purest soul". You're amazing. Always remember that. Or I'll have to remind you myself".
#asra#nadia#julian#muriel#portia#lucio#the arcane game#the arcana imagine#the arcana headcanon#thearcana#the arcana#thearcanaheadcanons#thearcanaimagine#thearcanaimagines#thearcanaheadcanon#asra x reader#nadia x reader#julian x reader#muriel x reader#portia x reader#lucio x reader
331 notes
·
View notes
Text
Notes on episode one
Sometimes when you’re feverish and hopped up on Niquil you just gotta rewatch the Witcher and type out your feelings in the notes app on your phone. “Writing down things I noticed” quickly became “writing more meta”, so! A look at how Geralt is different in this episode, and his relationship with Renfri the Shrike, Witcher dogma, and choice.
(in my defense i tried to keep things short by writing in bullet points but lol that’s cute)
-Geralt is so much softer in this episode. He is more open. He is by no means chatty or friendly, but he wears neutrality well. It’s obvious he expects people to treat him badly and turn him away just as much (or more) than he expects cooperation, and he is willing and able to accept either. He is a man doing a job. He asks for the alderman’s house, is inoffensive and neutral when the man chases off the helpful barmaid and tries to turn away. He tries to de-escalate— just tell me where it is and I’ll go. When that still doesn’t work and they threaten him, leave or on the end of the rope, he rolls with it, even jokes, “not a hard choice.” He isn’t angry, doesn’t even seem more than slightly annoyed, really. He’ll go. He had been open to the possibility of things working, and to the possibility that they might not, so he takes the hand dealt.
This Geralt is so different to the one we see in future episodes, who is much more jaded, cynical, even bitter. He’s not quite as able to meet people with that same neutrality.
-This Geralt is much more ready to accept the outstretched hand. He jokes in this episode. Look at his first interaction with Renfri when she helps him. He is slightly wary, but accepts the beer she buys him with curiosity. At her self-deprecating mention of a horrified mother, he jokes, “Our secret, then.” Earlier in the episode, there’s his humor and scorn for Stregobor, “All the good predictions rhyme.” He listened to all Stregobor’s bullshit with neutrality, likely trained as Witcher’s are to hear out people even when the job isn’t one a Witcher does. He doesn’t pander; he is straightforward, but also not purposefully offensive or aggressive until it is deserved. Even then, he works to remain even tempered— his greater and lesser evil speech, his blandly delivered disdain for Stregobor’s admissions of kidnapping and killing innocent women. His emotions break through now and then, but he gets them back in check. He keeps his distance.
But the humor. We see Geralt’s sense of humor in later episodes as well (“these views” to Triss comes to mind) but it is so much more freely given in this episode. Or it’s less surprising compared to his more open stance. He is utterly charmed by Marilka, he enjoys the back and forth with Renfri, he smirks when they cross verbal blades over what it means to be a monster and she tries to get a rise out of him. He is amused when she posits “what is they come after you?” Because for him that’s a given; that’s part of the Witcher job description! Of course people fear the mutant warriors. Of course he gets chased away, turned away. Of course they have come after him, and he was trained to be ready for that eventuality and to accept it like any other part of the job, not with violence and resentment but with a shrug and then to move on.
So much of what changes between episode 1 Geralt, who is maybe in his mid forties, and later Geralt, in his 50s-80s, is that he is not as readily able to keep that neutrality in him. He is not able to keep his carefully trained emotional distance, no matter how badly he wants to or how well he puts up the front. He has become jaded to the fear, the hate, the misunderstanding. (And it goes the other way, too, with softer emotions. He is definitely not keeping his distance when he fights to be allowed the save the Striga princess, when eh tries to gift Renfri’s brooch to her, for instance.) And a lot of it starts here, in Blaviken, where Geralt saved the innocent citizens of the market by killing a woman he had in fact liked and understood to an extent— and still he gets a stoning for it.
-Geralt just all around feels younger here. When do Witcher’s first leave Kaer Morhen to walk the Path? 18? 20? 22? The way he describes his first monster to Roach and the line “Yeah... I thought the world needed me, too;” I can definitely believe he was that young. (Imagine 18-20 year old Henri Cavill as Geralt. Imagine, I dare you. It’s darling.)
So he’s been on the Path for 20, 25 years maybe. Wandering with his horse, seeing much of the continent for the first time, taking jobs and facing down monsters, many of those for the first time, too. A heavily trained young man who had been prepared for a hostile world, for monsters and money, to live a job and take what is given. Witcher training is quite practical and unromantic when it comes to how they are trained to view and interact with the world. But it is still a romantic version of young Geralt we find in his tale. So ready to save a young woman, hotheaded and with messy strikes against a mere human when the Geralt we know is shown as nothing less than controlled and precise. The quite unromantic response of the rescued pokes fun at himself, completed with his self deprecating jibe, “yeah. I thought the world needed me, too.”
Grown up from his first days on the Path, this Geralt is still young, comparatively. Before the episode is done we see him grow up a bit more.
Also, just the way he interacts with Marilka rings so much like an older brother. That little smirk!
-So Geralt is younger, less jaded, more open. He is also more vulnerable, or at least he reads that way. Rewatch that kiss and tell me that their closeup doesn’t frame Renfri as the initiator and Geralt as the vulnerable, soft-eyed receiver.
-dang it, he just likes Renfri. Almost immediately. Maybe two lines into their dialogue and his wariness fades. Renfri is young, but she burns brightly. She is fierce and firm in her handling of the situation and her men, wry and a little sardonic, she isn’t afraid of him and even teases him— shouldn’t have taken the back roads, should buy some new clothes. Then she draws closer and flirts as she pours him another beer when the barman refuses to serve them both. (And that line before Marilka interrupts, along the lines of “Seems everywhere I go I find more and more monsters these days,” its so obvious she was about to broach the topic of Stregobor with him. Or is that just me?)
In the woods, her presence doesn’t alarm him when she approaches. He lets her keep his back, even knowing what Stregobor had told him. He goes back and forth with her on the matter of monsters and one’s own actions— which, phew, the commentary that gives on Witchers. An inherent conundrum of being taught that they, mutants, are inherently monstrous compared to humans yet must in their line of work, as traditionally neutral parties, remain neutral or risk acting the part of the monster. Their strength should not be turned against anything that is not a monster and a danger or it risks becoming monstrous, being used to monstrous purpose. “Great power, great responsibility.”
Regardless, he enjoys going back and forth with her. He liked her fierceness, respects it, sympathizes with her and views her as the wronged party in the affair with Stregobor. Yet still he tells her, the responsibility is hers to walk away from the violence. Go live your life. A truly Witcher response.
He doesn’t stop her following him to his camp. He doesn’t even stand when she floats in on his heels, lets her sit with him, listens when she speaks. He seems pleased when she admits that she will be leaving, receptive. Look at how his face softens when she speaks of her mother. Remember, this is the young man whose mother abandoned him at the foot of Kaer Morhen. It’s still raw all this time later, and will be a few decades on, as we see when he confronts her hallucination/vision. Geralt understands at least part of Renfri on a terribly personal level. He turns and lets her kiss him, not the other way around.
Of course, she lied. He dreams, or hears from within his dream, her prophecy. I’m not completely clear as to whether the show meant to imply that she used some kind of magical ability to put him to sleep, and if inside that spell her inadvertent prophecy came through. Regardless, he is beyond grim when he goes to town to stop her, and I do believe his expression when given the ultimatum by her men is very speakingful. If not enough for you, however, then of course there is his quiet, resigned, disgusted, “Fuck.”
But a Witcher accepts what comes from humans, good or ill. They walk away from attacks and hostility when they can, but defend themselves when needs must, and here it does.
But that’s the catch, see. When he decided to come into town, Geralt wasn’t following his Witcher training. Think of what he told Stregobor— it wasn’t his problem, Witchers don’t deal in human affairs, and Geralt himself prefers not to choose at all when faced with lesser, greater, middling evil. He would rather be the true neutral.
But he likes Renfri, empathizes with her even as he disdains and dislikes Stregobor. Geralt is the kind of man who was a young hothead bent on saving the world one young woman at a time. He likes bold, impetuous children and horses. His base instinct is to protect people and to side with the victims— we see its suggestion in this episode, and it is realized in full during the season. He isn’t neutral, as much as he wants to be.
So he chooses, and hates himself for it, because he will never know if he was right. (And it doesn’t matter if he was right. Because right or wrong, killing Renfri wounded him and he carries it for decades.)
It reinforces his belief that it is better not to choose at all. He was wrong to have chosen. He believes he should have walked away, let human affairs fall as they may, and yet we the audience know he will never be able to walk away from a massacre, do nothing, and still remain himself.
-Stregobor is the worst and that’s all I have to say about that.
-Renfri’s stepmother was 100% a lying turd and I will bet hard cash on that. “Yes her step mother told me she did this awful stuff, proving the mutation i had already decided existed anyway. Obviously she wanted to protect her own children so she hired me.” Are you???? Fuckin kidding me dude???? “Beep boop good thing there are no cautionary tales about jealous or cruel step mothers who hate their royal step children. Good thing no one would ever want to nerf said royal step children to open up the royal throne to their own get by, say, telling some teeny weeny lies to a gullible sorcerer who drinks his own koolaid” I s2g
-OH oh I almost forgot, one more thing. Just. One more.
Fucking. All of Henry Cavill’s acting in the final scene and fight with Renfri. That hurts, sir. Every look and expression screams how badly he does not want to do this. I’ve said it before in another meta (and, like, in countless tags) but the terrible, breathless vulnerability and dread in Geralt’s face when Renfri reveals herself and her hostage? How slowly and carefully he draws closer, sword turned down and away, free hand open and soothing, as he tries to convince her to stop? Tries to use axii on her, and the softness of his voice, the clench in his jaw that says even as he seems to plead and beg with his eyes for her to stop that he is preparing for what will happen if (when) she won’t and despises every moment of it?
It’s like the culmination of the audience’s introduction to What A Witcher Is (or perhaps better, What A Witcher Does). We see it throughout the episode. What a Witcher is, is neutral. They take what they are given. What they do is their job and nothing more.
They kill dangerous monsters that threaten others and themselves. With humans, they defend themselves when necessary and that is all; necessity. There is no choice, it is simply what a Witcher does in a world where they know that sometimes the worst reaction a person can have doesn’t stop with angry words and threats. It is just another part of the life. They will back out, they will leave, they will sleep in the woods when they know they’re not welcome. They don’t push. They have been trained to avoid fighting humans wherever possible. They are not the aggressors, when blows come to blows. It is not what they do.
Renfri cannot stop. Geralt must know this, after the intensity of their conversation in the woods. It is not Geralt the Witcher who made the decision to follow her to town; the Witcher would have left. Geralt the man, well, we know what he would do because we see it.
When Renfri attacks him, however, he reacts as a Witcher does. As he did against her men. Controlled, precise, eliminating the threat. No cruelty or hatred. Just training.
-Unlike his fight against the men, which is largely one long, smoothe dance, the fight against Renfri is riddled with pauses, stalemates where they lock eyes and we are shown closeups of their silent, intense exchanges. Neither wants to be there, but neither is willing to back down.
-In my last meta I mentioned how Geralt clearly had the upper hand throughout their fight and doesn’t utilize multiple chances to finish the fight and critically injure Renfri. He instead tries to de-escalate-- strikes out with a slap, pins her, parries, defends, disarms her. These pauses in the fight for their eyes to meet and the little moments of silent communication seem an extension of this. More so, if I’m going to work with the Geralt the man vs. Geralt the Witcher dichotomy, then I would say these moments are Geralt the man breaking through. Communicating how he can’t let her go through with her plan. Begging her to reconsider, to walk away. Frustration, dread, a nonverbal don’t do this and don’t make me do this.
Especially that last closeup. With Witcher efficiency and neutrality, he reacts to her final attack by turning her dagger back on her and sinking it neatly into her throat. Threat eliminated. Save... they both react with a long pause of breathless shock, before he wrenches it back out and she begins to bleed. There is a final close up from over her shoulder, her hair half obscuring Geralt’s face as he gazes presumably into her eyes, as he brings one hand up to her cheek— Geralt without speaking makes very clear how much pain he is in. He does what a Witcher does, but even as his hands did the work he is himself a gutted man. Regret. Pain. Love, of a sorts, whatever love can grow for someone you’ve known in such a short time yet felt such empathy and enjoyment and appreciation for.
That is the young Geralt we saw, vulnerable and open and humorous, and this is where he ends.
Look at his face as he leaves Blaviken. Geralt has become who we will follow for the rest of the season.
-(If you look, really look, Marilka is not angry when she tells him to get out of Blaviken and never come back. Her eyes are soft, and sad. She is a clever little girl in a village too small, who knows the people there better than Geralt, and who knows he will never get more than a stoning. Maybe Geralt would have fought Stregobor for Renfri, maybe not. But Marilka tells him to leave, and he does.)
#taran talks meta#geralt of rivia#renfri the shrike#the witcher#meta#1x01#marilka#i'm probably just repeating myself at this point but i love love love this episode#it hurts me each time god dammit#i wish i could make gifs to go with this to like#SHOW what i'm working off of
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
to burn the castle down before the princess is awake
Here is my (somewhat late) first entry to the Van Helsing installment of @peters-pumpkin-day--I hope everyone enjoys!
“You’re sure you saw her there? Alone?” Abraham Van Helsing pressed, withdrawing a plate of biscuits like a sharp reflex as his face clouded over. Marianne knew that look—it was the same look he’d given her when she’d told him of… of her first engagement. When he’d learned she’d been kissed by a vampire. It had unsettled her then, almost scared her—that certain sign that something was wrong. Maybe it should scare her now… maybe if she weren’t still so numb.
The Sexton sitting across the parlor from them nodded grimly. “She looked exactly the same as she had at the funeral. Same nightgown, same curls… except her eyes were red. Poor child looked as though she’d been either bleeding or crying.” He pushed away his plate, mouth contorting as if he’d suddenly lost his appetite, and dabbed at his limp grey mustache with a napkin. “I can only imagine what Gina’s family would think if they could see her now…”
“I hope they will not have to.” Marianne hadn’t even realized she’d said it out loud until Abraham and the Sexton turned to look at her, Abraham out of concern, the Sexton out of shock. She paid them no mind or at least tried to, her cheeks burning as she wrung her hands into her skirt. “It would break their hearts.” It had been so long, so many years ago that she felt safe putting it all behind her. Now, for a terrible moment, all she could see was the funeral. Every time she closed her eyes, she could see it… the weeping family in quiet denial, the confused students begging for answers, the ensuing chaos as it looked like she was about to lose her place in the school forever… as everything seemed to fall apart… and there was Gina, so peaceful in her coffin, wreathed in flowers. Completely unaware.
The touch of Abraham’s hand slipping into hers eased her back to the present, and she squeezed it as he turned back to the Sexton. “And you don’t think she’ll be compelled to leave?”
“I can’t imagine she would. As soon as we caught wind of her presence, I had the Sisters bar the windows and doors and station a cross in front of them. Unless she takes it into her head to scratch her way out with her fingernails, she isn’t going anywhere.” She saw his head tilt for a moment towards her as if to ask something before deciding against it. “The only trouble will be what to do for service in the morning—”
“You won’t have to worry about that, Sexton.” Extracting his hand from Marianne’s, Abraham stood up from the sofa and authoritatively drew himself up to his full height. “If you’ll take me to the chapel, I’ll make sure she never troubles your parishioners or anyone else ever again.”
The Sexton blanched a bit as the offer sank in. “You—You mean you’ll—?”
“It’s all the peace I can give the poor girl, and all the promise I can give you that this contagion can be stamped out.”
“I’ll go with you,” Marianne spoke up, standing in turn and causing both men to look at her again with the same expressions. She had expected them to protest, but it didn’t matter. This was her Gigi, her student, her confidante. Even if her husband would remind her otherwise now, tell her not to waste her tears on some… she couldn’t even bear to think it. She simply couldn’t stay here and do nothing.
As expected, the Sexton immediately raised a hand as if to placate her, his mustache bristling in quiet disbelief. “Oh, I don’t think—this isn’t exactly women’s work—”
“Marianne knows better than most what suffering the undead can both experience and bring about,” Abraham cut him off, his voice mild, but holding no room for debate. “I trust her with my life.”
A muscle was still twitching in the Sexton’s jaw, but he said nothing this time, drawing his coat further around him and readjusting his scarf. “In that case, I’ll… I’ll bring the cab back around and wait for you.” He started for the door before turning around and giving Abraham a wry face. “It’s such a nasty business, isn’t it? Vampires and all that…?”
“It’s not a business I relish, but it is a necessary one. We’ll be with you in a few minutes, Sexton.” And with that, Abraham closed the door behind him, leaving silence in the house once more. Marianne busied herself with the abandoned dishes—it was something to do with her hands—while her husband remained frozen at the door for a moment. Even without seeing his face, she could feel the change coming over him, like a cool breeze in late summer. It was another face she knew very well now, even with his back to her. His shoulders drooped a bit, but seemed to harden at the same time, and as he stepped away, there was a weary resoluteness in his stride. A soldier off to battle. He crossed the sitting room into his tiny study, reached under his desk, and pulled out his weapon—a small leather satchel—before returning and setting it down on the end table to take inventory.
She could finish the dishes later. Reaching for her coat and hurriedly shrugging it on, Marianne peered into the satchel and picked over a few of the small items: vials of silver and hawthorn shavings, a bottle of Holy Water not disguised in an ordinary drinking flash, a wooden cross that fit perfectly into her hand… “You will not mind if I take a few of these?” she inquired, tucking them into her coat pocket. “I don’t want to go into the chapel unarmed—I hate feeling so useless against these things.”
“Please do.” Upon hearing his wife’s self-deprecation, he looked up at her, and his face softened the tiniest bit. “You are far from useless, darling, I promise you. In fact, I’m glad you’re coming with me. Gina knows you. She once loved and admired you—she can listen to you. Besides, I wouldn’t want you to stay here by yourself.” When she drew a tiny silver crucifix on a delicate chain from one of the satchel’s inside pockets, he motioned for her to turn around with a finger and threaded it under her hair, clasping it at the nape of her neck. His hands were warm and dry, almost cracked in places from years of callouses, so different from the cold, soft hands of her former fiance… stop thinking about him, Marianne. He isn’t here now—he is just ash now, he can’t hurt you… still, she resolved to keep this crucifx on indefinitely. Just in case. Perhaps it, too, would come in handy tonight… God, wasn’t that also a terrible thought? Using something so beautiful against someone she once called friend…
“…I think she was jealous of me.”
“How’s that?” came Abraham’s voice over her shoulder.
“Of me and the Baron.” Letting her hair fall back over her shoulder, she turned back around to face him. “I told her about our engagement the night he asked me. I was… so happy.” It seemed so long ago and so far away… like it had happened to someone entirely different. She could remember the ghost of a smile on her face as she shared the secret that night, but it was a hollow thing… no remembered emotion attached to it. Sometimes her skin tingled where he’d kissed her, but painfully, like a burn that never fully scarred over. “And she acted as though she was, too. She was smiling and cheerful and asked me all sorts of questions about him, but… I can’t say how, but it—none of it seemed quite real. As if she was trying to be happy just because I was happy.” That was painful, too, in retrospect—the idea that the last conversation she’d ever had with her friend, Gina had not been honest with her. “And when the Baron found her…” She swallowed thickly, throat suddenly burning now. “I cannot imagine what she thought then. Or what he thought…”
Abraham’s eyes held that same weariness as he nodded, his voice holding a note of pity as he spoke again. “He thought of her only as an easy prize to win—someone he could make false promises to and then humiliate.”
“But what about her?” Marianne pressed on desperately. “Do you think… do you think Gina loved him? Even if he did not—could not love her?”
“I can’t say.” But why not, Marianne was about to ask. Help me make sense of this—tell me why Gina would do this, why he would do this, why I had to lose my only friend here, please, love, tell me… but an gently upraised hand quieted her thoughts for a moment. “I do know that Meinster’s brand of evil can be very seductive. There’s a promise of freedom in it—freedom to love, freedom to do as one pleases… freedom from consequences. I can imagine that was very attractive to a poor girl like Gina.”
That did make some sense… but Marianne knew the Baron, knew his smiling condescension toward the other girls. Knew even his condescension toward her, the foolish woman who rescued him, the foreigner who still struggled with English and couldn’t possibly understand. She was a silly girl, and Gina would have seemed even sillier to him… he could do so much worse than humiliate her. Precious Gina, with all her hopes and dreams… “When I found her that night in the stables… she greeted me like an old friend. She called me her darling, asked me to kiss her… all with that terrible smile on her face and those horrible teeth…” She’d seen that same taunting smile on more than one face now. “I wonder if she learned that from him.”
This time Abraham looked a bit alarmed as he pulled down his coat and shrugged it on, an expression of regret warring in his features as if he wished he could have been there sooner to spare her… Marianne clung to that look. It meant she wasn’t crazy, that he wouldn’t dismiss it as a nightmare… that she might not have been alone, even as she stood there feeling that night’s freezing wind through the slats in the stable walls and glancing back at her friend’s glinting fangs. “I would not be surprised, darling.”
“And then she—she asked me to forgive her. For letting him love her. What—What should I have forgiven her for?” What had he done to her to make her believe such a thing? He’d already taken her soul, twisted her body into something evil and perverse like his—what else could he possibly take from her? Tears actually stung at Marianne’s eyes now, and a hot well of shame rose in her chest. “What did he do to her that I should have forgiven?” He’d never go away, he’d never leave her, that terrible man… even dead, he’d taken so much from them both. Poor Gina, weeping and defiled, alone on ground that burned her feet. This is all my fault, Marianne thought bitterly, pressing her hand hard to her mouth, trying to keep the tears away. This was all her fault… she could have spared Gina this fate. She should have gone with the Baron, should have agreed to marry him. Better her soul than Gina’s. Better for her to have accepted it. “If I had been there when it happened—if—if I would never have freed him—” The well in her chest burst, and her words were lost to helpless sobbing.
In a moment, Abraham’s arms were around her, holding her close against the warmth of his coat as she cried. “It wasn’t your fault, Marianne. None of it was your fault…”
“What—Wh-What will she say now? Now that the B-Baron is gone—now that he’s been… been taken away from her… now that we… she wanted me to forgive her…”
“Is that what you fear?”
She shook her head, burrowing against his fur collar
“What are you afraid of?”
“I’m afraid… that Gina w-will still hate me so much for it that—that no matter what you do to free her soul… that h-hatred will still…”
“Will keep her from Heaven?”
Hearing it out loud wrenched a new flood of tears from her. She is going to hell, your friend will be sent to hell… dear, sweet, supportive Gina, who never deserved it. And the Baron would be waiting for her to torment her again… there was a very small part of her mind that knew such a thought was ridiculous, that knew she had no way to know for sure, but the fear was still there. The fear and the strangling guilt.
“I’m afraid I can promise very little in that respect,” Abraham said softly after a moment. “What she still feels once her soul is at rest is between her and God.” Marianne felt his arms withdraw and she tried to cling on, just for that fleeting safety, but to her relief he only pulled far enough away to hold her loosely at arm’s length. “But I can promise she won’t be suffering any longer, and you will be there to bear witness and help her to the other side. Besides… our God is a forgiving God. No matter what she thinks in her final moments, He will see that she was an innocent and accept her regardless.”
She tried to nod, tried to believe him… and she so badly wanted to. But that outcome still seemed so far away. They had to find Gina first… had to rid her of his contagion. Abraham had defined vampires as plague-carriers to her once, and it felt easier to think that way. That Gina was merely sick beyond cure… not that that was any more comforting. “She—She will not be awake when you…” She trailed off and nodded suggestively over at his bag, still unable to say the words.
“Not if I can help it,” Abraham replied, shaking his head. “If possible, I’ll wait until she goes to sleep before dawn. And if not… I promise I will still try to make it as painless as I can.”
…That, at least, she could live with. For the moment. For Gina’s sake. “I’m glad for that. I don’t… I don’t want her to suffer any more than she has…”
“I know, darling. And she won’t.” He didn’t have to repeat himself, but the steadfast and solemn warmth in his eyes said, I promise you.
In that moment, the words thank you seemed inadequate, so she leaned forward to kiss him, letting that warmth comfort her all over again. They would have all night to deal with cold, dead things. Let her have this now before going to war against them. Abraham’s hand came up to cradle the back of her head, caressing her hair even as she pulled away and was ashamed to feel tears clinging to her lashes again. Less out of fear this time and more out of sheer relief… the fear was still there, but it was duller now. “I’m so sorry for—for falling to pieces like this.” She wiped her eyes with the heel of her hand. “It’s so embarrassing…”
“Don’t apologize, my love.” His answering smile was thin and tired, but no less sincere. “Thank you for telling me. It will help us both tonight.”
The whickering of horses outside the window gave Marianne a start, prompting a wet laugh out of her before composing herself. “We should not keep the Sexton waiting,” she said, buttoning her coat and patting down her pockets to make sure her borrowed supplies were still there. “He’s probably wondering what is taking us so long.” Taking a deep breath and laying a hand over the cross at her throat for a moment, she nodded again to Abraham, who opened the door to the cold black night. Where lay so many of her nightmares newly formed… but this one would fade before morning. And just this once, she would be safe. One small victory in their war against the darkness. Lifting her skirts as the dead leaves wafted by across the threshold, Marianne took a step.
#peters-pumpkin-day#professor van helsing#marianne danielle#the brides of dracula#hammer horror#my fanfic
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
Kitsune (3)
The path was dark and treacherous at night, and I tripped over branches and rocks more times than I could count, but nothing approached me. I didn’t see anything in the tree besides birds and moths; nothing seemed to follow me.
I hadn’t been to the cemetery since I was little. It was a plain thing, just upturned dirt marked with wooden crosses and a pile of rocks. A few had picture frames by the crosses; others were left as is.
I swung my flashlight over the cemetery and paused. At one end of the land, before a grave, sat a white fox with six tails tipped in crimson.
Katsu didn’t react to the light’s beam besides twitching his ears. His tails were writhing live a living bouquet, restless and powerful and maybe even a bit distressed.
I approached slowly, dirt crunching beneath my sneakers, and stopped next to him. This grave was also unmarked, but someone had put a candle and some incense before the mound of rocks marking it. It didn’t even have a wooden cross; the dirt was dark and visibly disturbed enough to be newly piled.
My mouth was so dry that at first, words failed to form on my tongue. I swallowed and tried again. “Who is this?”
Katsu didn’t answer at first. He swiveled a fuzzy ear my way, but didn’t take his eyes from the grave. Finally, a puff of smoke, and a man stood by me, exactly like I remembered him, though I hadn’t actually laid eyes on him since the summer I turned nine.
“Ayako Sasaki.” He said it tenderly, intimately, putting her personal name before the family name, as if they had been close.
Grandma.
The flashlight beam trembled and vibrated. “How? When?”
“This morning. Heart attack. I had to bury her myself.”
“You didn’t call the police?” I couldn’t feel my feet, my hands. My body seemed to be floating in the cemetery, a ghost haunting a resting place.
“I did. I had to disguise myself to do it, but she was already dead when they arrived. I insisted she be buried with her family.”
Unlike my parents, who were buried together, but a sea away from everyone. Alone in a foreign home. I suddenly couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think. Why didn’t I request having their bodies shipped to Japan for burial?
I didn’t remember falling to my knees, but suddenly I was on the ground, hugging my knees to my chest, choking. “I can’t—no. No.”
Katsu said nothing.
“Is this it?” My vision was wobbling, hot tears spilling down my cheeks, chin quivering. “Am I—am I next? Am I going to die? Am I going to die all alone?”
A weight settled on my head, but I couldn’t look up at him. “You don’t have to.”
“My parents are dead! Grandma is dead! I’m the only one left!”
“Stay with me,” he said, calm and soft like I couldn’t be. Gentle as a feather and warm like a heart bleeding. “Don’t leave anymore. I’ll protect you from your curse.”
Grandma told me not to promise Katsu anything, but Grandma wasn’t here.
I sniffled. “Okay. Please, take me home.”
He lifted me into his arms like a small child, held close to his chest, and I buried my face in his neck and silently cried the whole way back to the house.
~
I woke up tucked into my futon the next morning, cicadas singing outside. Peaceful, almost cheerful, considering all of my family was now dead.
It took me several minutes to leave my bed, but when I did I wrapped myself in a robe and stumbled out.
Katsu was sitting on the porch with a cup of tea steaming next to him, arms tucked into his sleeves, mask staring out at the yard. I took a seat next to him, folding my legs beneath me.
“What should we do now?” I asked softly, turning my face into the breeze.
He didn’t answer immediately. “The house could use some repairs. We need to get the deed under your name and see if Ayako-sama left you anything in her will.”
“Yeah.” I didn’t look forward to it.
“The sooner the better.”
“We should wait at least a week, I think. I’ll turn eighteen on Thursday, so I’ll be legal to do … whatever.” I couldn’t believe I would be spending my birthday alone. I couldn’t believe I would be spending all of my birthdays alone, forever.
Katsu nodded, and we fell silent once more.
~
The week moved miserably slowly.
We built a shrine for my parents and Grandma in the living room and visited the cemetery daily. Katsu would sometimes disappear into the woods alone for several hours, but I never asked, and he never offered.
The night before my birthday, we sat together on the porch, eating bowls of boiled rice for dinner. I didn’t know how to cook much, but Grandma didn’t have any frozen or prepared meals any where in the house, so plain rice it was.
I thought about asking him what he did for all that time he was alone in the woods, but it seemed invasive to ask. I had hated and feared Katsu more than anyone or anything for years, yet now even his presence was preferable to being left alone. I dreaded those hours when he left, even more than I used to dread him. I wanted to tell him to stay. Wanted to know why did you ask me to stay if you plan to leave? Wanted to know won’t you please just take me with you?
But instead, I asked, “Why didn’t you follow Grandma to America when she moved? Why did you stay here?”
We had been eating in silence up to this point, and my question caused him to pause, chopsticks halfway to his mouth. He put them back in his bowl gently, mask tilted down. “I can’t leave.”
“Why not?” I wasn’t familiar with any mythology of kitsune tied to specific places.
“I suppose you could say I’m trapped here.”
“How so?”
“Aren’t you full of questions this evening. Why so curious, girl? You haven’t seemed interested before now.”
Because I’m lonely. Because I need to understand. Because I want to ask you to stay with me, too.
I dropped my eyes into my bowl, stirring the rice absently. “You’ve mentioned her abandoning you, but that seems weird, considering you were her familiar. Why not take you with her?”
“She couldn’t. Not that she would have even if she could. That would negate the reason for leaving in the first place.” He looked out into the yard, and I found that I desperately wanted him to take off his mask so I could see his expression.
“Didn’t she leave for Grandpa?”
“She left for a different future. For a future that didn’t involve being a tsukimono-suji. And being a fox witch involves a fox, so a future without the former must be a future without the latter.” His voice went odd near the end, almost wry, a sort of self-deprecating joke with himself.
I was quiet for a minute. “Would you have followed? If you could?”
He snorted. “Of course I would have. I’m nothing if not persistent.”
“So what ties you here, to this place? Why are you trapped?”
“Mm. You’re persistent too, I see.” He sighed dramatically, leaning back on his arms, half-finished bowl cast aside. “I am missing something rather important.”
“Oh. So you lost something.”
“Lost is such a strong word, and also a very inaccurate one, for my situation. Stolen is much more accurate.”
I straightened. “Wait, stolen? By who?”
“An old … ah, friend of mine, shall we say. Very big guy, very ugly. I think he was quite jealous of me, poor dear. He took it from me during a friendly brawl and planted it somewhere on the property. I’ve been looking for it for ages, it seems.” His tails were out now, and they lashed the air irritably.
“How do you know he didn’t take it with him?”
He waved a hand dismissively. “I can feel when I’m close to it. Seems he’s put a curse on it to keep me from tracking it properly though, the bastard.”
“He doesn’t sound very friendly.”
“We have a beautiful relationship, I promise you. I’ve never met such a vile creature.”
That didn’t sound friendly at all, but I decided to drop it. “Is that where you go every evening? Looking for your treasure?”
“Treasure is a peculiar word—“
“Your precious?”
“My what?”
“Your fortune?”
“It’s not really a fortune, per say—“
“The apple of your eye? Your darling? Your pride and joy? Your still-beating heart?”
“Listen here you little—“
“Your nest egg? The love of your life? Your most prized possession? The soul you don’t have?”
“How dare you mock me in my own home.”
It was then that I realized, for the first time in what felt like a small eon, I was actually, genuinely smiling.
#my post#kitsune#angst#mythology#lore#enemies to lovers#enemies to friends to lovers#romance#tw: death#magic
5 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
ruhununtutsagi
zeynep
sylviaodhner
Sylvia Odhner
azucosplay
Azu
chaotically-an-emily
E M I L Y
cup1dsdaughter
𝒶𝒹𝒹𝒾𝑒 ౨ৎ