#also addresses a LOT of uh. talking points recently
Text
essential reading.
Opinion - There is a Jewish Hope for Palestinian Liberation. It Must Survive. - by Peter Beinart
And perhaps one day, when it finally becomes hideously clear that Hamas cannot free Palestinians by murdering children and Israel cannot subdue Gaza, even by razing it to the ground, those communities may become the germ of a mass movement for freedom that astonishes the world, as Black and white South Africans did decades ago. I’m confident I won’t live to see it. No gambler would stake a bet on it happening at all. But what’s the alternative, for those of us whose lives and histories are bound up with that small, ghastly, sacred place?
"In 1988, bombs exploded at restaurants, sporting events and arcades in South Africa. In response, the African National Congress, then in its 77th year of a struggle to overthrow white domination, did something remarkable: It accepted responsibility and pledged to prevent its fighters from conducting such operations in the future. Its logic was straightforward: Targeting civilians is wrong. “Our morality as revolutionaries,” the A.N.C. declared, “dictates that we respect the values underpinning the humane conduct of war.”
Historically, geographically and morally, the A.N.C. of 1988 is a universe away from the Hamas of 2023, so remote that its behavior may seem irrelevant to the horror that Hamas unleashed last weekend in southern Israel. But South Africa offers a counter-history, a glimpse into how ethical resistance works and how it can succeed. It offers not an instruction manual, but a place — in this season of agony and rage — to look for hope.
There was nothing inevitable about the A.N.C.’s policy, which, as Jeff Goodwin, a New York University sociologist, has documented, helped ensure that there was “so little terrorism in the anti-apartheid struggle.” So why didn’t the A.N.C. carry out the kind of gruesome massacres for which Hamas has become notorious? There’s no simple answer. But two factors are clear. First, the A.N.C.’s strategy for fighting apartheid was intimately linked to its vision of what should follow apartheid. It refused to terrify and traumatize white South Africans because it wasn’t trying to force them out. It was trying to win them over to a vision of a multiracial democracy.
ADVERTISEMENT
Second, the A.N.C. found it easier to maintain moral discipline — which required it to focus on popular, nonviolent resistance and use force only against military installations and industrial sites — because its strategy was showing signs of success. By 1988, when the A.N.C. expressed regret for killing civilians, more than 150 American universities had at least partially divested from companies doing business in South Africa, and the United States Congress had imposed sanctions on the apartheid regime. The result was a virtuous cycle: Ethical resistance elicited international support, and international support made ethical resistance easier to sustain.
In Israel today, the dynamic is almost exactly the opposite. Hamas, whose authoritarian, theocratic ideology could not be farther from the A.N.C.’s, has committed an unspeakable horror that may damage the Palestinian cause for decades to come. Yet when Palestinians resist their oppression in ethical ways — by calling for boycotts, sanctions and the application of international law — the United States and its allies work to ensure that those efforts fail, which convinces many Palestinians that ethical resistance doesn’t work, which empowers Hamas.
The savagery Hamas committed on Oct. 7 has made reversing this monstrous cycle much harder. It could take a generation. It will require a shared commitment to ending Palestinian oppression in ways that respect the infinite value of every human life. It will require Palestinians to forcefully oppose attacks on Jewish civilians, and Jews to support Palestinians when they resist oppression in humane ways — even though Palestinians and Jews who take such steps will risk making themselves pariahs among their own people. It will require new forms of political community, in Israel-Palestine and around the world, built around a democratic vision powerful enough to transcend tribal divides. The effort may fail. It has failed before. The alternative is to descend, flags waving, into hell.
As Jewish Israelis bury their dead and recite psalms for their captured, few want to hear at this moment that millions of Palestinians lack basic human rights. Neither do many Jews abroad. I understand; this attack has awakened the deepest traumas of our badly scarred people. But the truth remains: The denial of Palestinian freedom sits at the heart of this conflict, which began long before Hamas’s creation in the late 1980s.
Most of Gaza’s residents aren’t from Gaza. They’re the descendants of refugees who were expelled, or fled in fear, during Israel’s war of independence in 1948. They live in what Human Rights Watch has called an “open-air prison,” penned in by an Israeli state that — with help from Egypt — rations everything that goes in and out, from tomatoes to the travel documents children need to get lifesaving medical care. From this overcrowded cage, which the United Nations in 2017 declared “unlivable” for many residents in part because it lacks electricity and clean water, many Palestinians in Gaza can see the land that their parents and grandparents called home, though most may never step foot in it.
Palestinians in the West Bank are only slightly better off. For more than half a century, they have lived without due process, free movement, citizenship or the ability to vote for the government that controls their lives. Defenseless against an Israeli government that includes ministers openly committed to ethnic cleansing, many are being driven from their homes in what Palestinians compare to the mass expulsions of 1948. Americans and Israeli Jews have the luxury of ignoring these harsh realities. Palestinians do not. Indeed, the commander of Hamas’s military wing cited attacks on Palestinians in the West Bank in justifying its barbarism last weekend.
Just as Black South Africans resisted apartheid, Palestinians resist a system that has earned the same designation from the world’s leading human rights organizations and Israel’s own. After last weekend, some critics may claim Palestinians are incapable of resisting in ethical ways. But that’s not true. In 1936, during the British mandate, Palestinians began what some consider the longest anticolonial general strike in history. In 1976, on what became known as Land Day, thousands of Palestinian citizens demonstrated against the Israeli government’s seizure of Palestinian property in Israel’s north. The first intifada against Israel’s occupation of the West Bank and the Gaza Strip, which lasted from roughly 1987 to 1993, consisted primarily of nonviolent boycotts of Israeli goods and a refusal to pay Israeli taxes. While some Palestinians threw stones and Molotov cocktails, armed attacks were rare, even in the face of an Israeli crackdown that took more than 1,000 Palestinian lives. In 2005, 173 Palestinian civil society organizations asked “people of conscience all over the world to impose broad boycotts and implement divestment initiatives against Israel similar to those applied to South Africa in the apartheid era.”
But in the United States, Palestinians received little credit for trying to follow Black South Africans’ largely nonviolent path. Instead, the Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement’s call for full equality, including the right of Palestinian refugees to return home, was widely deemed antisemitic because it conflicts with the idea of a state that favors Jews.
It is true that these nonviolent efforts sit uncomfortably alongside an ugly history of civilian massacres: the murder of 67 Jews in Hebron in 1929 by local Palestinians after Haj Amin al-Husseini, the grand mufti of Jerusalem, claimed Jews were about to seize Al Aqsa Mosque; the airplane hijackings of the late 1960s and 1970s carried out primarily by the leftist Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine and Yasir Arafat’s nationalist Fatah faction; the 1972 assassination of Israeli athletes in Munich carried out by the Palestinian organization Black September; and the suicide bombings of the 1990s and 2000s conducted by Hamas, Palestinian Islamic Jihad and Fatah’s Aqsa Martyrs Brigades, whose victims included a friend of mine in rabbinical school who I dreamed might one day officiate my wedding.
And yet it is essential to remember that some Palestinians courageously condemned this inhuman violence. In 1979, Edward Said, the famed literary critic, declared himself “horrified at the hijacking of planes, the suicidal missions, the assassinations, the bombing of schools and hotels.” Rashid Khalidi, a Palestinian American historian, called the suicide bombings of the second intifada “a war crime.” After Hamas’s attack last weekend, a member of the Israeli parliament, Ayman Odeh, among the most prominent leaders of Israel’s Palestinian citizens, declared, “It is absolutely forbidden to accept any attacks on the innocent.”Tragically, this vision of ethical resistance is being repudiated by some pro-Palestinian activists in the United States. In a statement last week, National Students for Justice in Palestine, which represents more than 250 Palestinian solidarity groups in North America, called Hamas’s attack “a historic win for the Palestinian resistance” that proves that “total return and liberation to Palestine is near” and added, “from Rhodesia to South Africa to Algeria, no settler colony can hold out forever.” One of its posters featured a paraglider that some Hamas fighters used to enter Israel.
The reference to Algeria reveals the delusion underlying this celebration of abduction and murder. After eight years of hideous war, Algeria’s settlers returned to France. But there will be no Algerian solution in Israel-Palestine. Israel is too militarily powerful to be conquered. More fundamentally, Israeli Jews have no home country to which to return. They are already home.
Mr. Said understood this. “The Israeli Jew is there in the Middle East,” he advised Palestinians in 1974, “and we cannot, I might even say that we must not, pretend that he will not be there tomorrow, after the struggle is over.” The Jewish “attachment to the land,” he added, “is something we must face.” Because Mr. Said saw Israeli Jews as something other than mere colonizers, he understood the futility — as well as the immorality — of trying to terrorize them into flight.
The failure of Hamas and its American defenders to recognize that will make it much harder for Jews and Palestinians to resist together in ethical ways. Before last Saturday, it was possible, with some imagination, to envision a joint Palestinian-Jewish struggle for the mutual liberation of both peoples. There were glimmers in the protest movement against Benjamin Netanyahu’s judicial overhaul, through which more and more Israeli Jews grasped a connection between the denial of rights to Palestinians and the assault on their own. And there were signs in the United States, where almost 40 percent of American Jews under the age of 40 told the Jewish Electoral Institute in 2021 that they considered Israel an apartheid state. More Jews in the United States, and even Israel, were beginning to see Palestinian liberation as a form of Jewish liberation as well.
That potential alliance has now been gravely damaged. There are many Jews willing to join Palestinians in a movement to end apartheid, even if doing so alienates us from our communities, and in some cases, our families. But we will not lock arms with people who cheer the kidnapping or murder of a Jewish child.
The struggle to persuade Palestinian activists to repudiate Hamas’s crimes, affirm a vision of mutual coexistence and continue the spirit of Mr. Said and the A.N.C. will be waged inside the Palestinian camp. The role of non-Palestinians is different: to help create the conditions that allow ethical resistance to succeed.
Palestinians are not fundamentally different from other people facing oppression: When moral resistance doesn’t work, they try something else. In 1972, the Northern Ireland Civil Rights Association, which was modeled on the civil rights movement in the United States, organized a march to oppose imprisonment without trial. Although some organizations, most notably the Provisional Irish Republican Army, had already embraced armed resistance, they grew stronger after British soldiers shot 26 unarmed civilians in what became known as Bloody Sunday. By the early 1980s, the Irish Republican Army had even detonated a bomb outside Harrods, the department store in London. As Kirssa Cline Ryckman, a political scientist, observed in a 2019 paper on why certain movements turn violent, a lack of progress in peaceful protest “can encourage the use of violence by convincing demonstrators that nonviolence will fail to achieve meaningful concessions.”
Israel, with America’s help, has done exactly that. It has repeatedly undermined Palestinians who sought to end Israel’s occupation through negotiations or nonviolent pressure. As part of the 1993 Oslo Accords, the Palestine Liberation Organization renounced violence and began working with Israel — albeit imperfectly — to prevent attacks on Israelis, something that revolutionary groups like the A.N.C. and the Irish Republican Army never did while their people remained under oppression. At first, as Khalil Shikaki, a Palestinian political scientist, has detailed, Palestinians supported cooperation with Israel because they thought it would deliver them a state. In early 1996, Palestinian support for the Oslo process reached 80 percent while support for violence against Israelis dropped to 20 percent.
The 1996 election of Benjamin Netanyahu, and the failure of Israel and its American patron to stop settlement growth, however, curdled Palestinian sentiment. Many Jewish Israelis believe that Ehud Barak, who succeeded Mr. Netanyahu, offered Palestinians a generous deal in 2000. Most Palestinians, however, saw Mr. Barak’s offer as falling far short of a fully sovereign state along the 1967 lines. And their disillusionment with a peace process that allowed Israel to entrench its hold over the territory on which they hoped to build their new country ushered in the violence of the second intifada. In Mr. Shikaki’s words, “The loss of confidence in the ability of the peace process to deliver a permanent agreement on acceptable terms had a dramatic impact on the level of Palestinian support for violence against Israelis.” As Palestinians abandoned hope, Hamas gained power.
After the brutal years of the second intifada, in which Hamas and other Palestinian armed groups repeatedly targeted Israeli civilians, President Mahmoud Abbas of the Palestinian Authority and Salam Fayyad, his prime minister from 2007 to 2013, worked to restore security cooperation and prevent anti-Israeli violence once again. Yet again, the strategy failed. The same Israeli leaders who applauded Mr. Fayyad undermined him in back rooms by funding the settlement growth that convinced Palestinians that security cooperation was bringing them only deepening occupation. Mr. Fayyad, in an interview with The Times’s Roger Cohen before he left office in 2013, admitted that because the “occupation regime is more entrenched,” Palestinians “question whether the P.A. can deliver. Meanwhile, Hamas gains recognition and is strengthened.”
As Palestinians lost faith that cooperation with Israel could end the occupation, many appealed to the world to hold Israel accountable for its violation of their rights. In response, both Democratic and Republican presidents have worked diligently to ensure that these nonviolent efforts fail. Since 1997, the United States has vetoed more than a dozen United Nations Security Council resolutions criticizing Israel for its actions in the West Bank and Gaza. This February, even as Israel’s far-right government was beginning a huge settlement expansion, the Biden administration reportedly wielded a veto threat to drastically dilute a Security Council resolution that would have condemned settlement growth.
Washington’s response to the International Criminal Court’s efforts to investigate potential Israeli war crimes is equally hostile. Despite lifting sanctions that the Trump administration imposed on I.C.C. officials investigating the United States’s conduct in Afghanistan, the Biden team remains adamantly opposed to any I.C.C. investigation into Israel’s actions.
The Boycott, Divestment and Sanctions movement, or B.D.S., which was founded in 2005 as a nonviolent alternative to the murderous second intifada and which speaks in the language of human rights and international law, has been similarly stymied, including by many of the same American politicians who celebrated the movement to boycott, divest from and sanction South Africa. Joe Biden, who is proud of his role in passing sanctions against South Africa, has condemned the B.D.S. movement, saying it “too often veers into antisemitism.” About 35 states — some of which once divested state funds from companies doing business in apartheid South Africa — have passed laws or issued executive orders punishing companies that boycott Israel. In many cases, those punishments apply even to businesses that boycott only Israeli settlements in the West Bank.
Palestinians have noticed. In the words of Dana El Kurd, a Palestinian American political scientist, “Palestinians have lost faith in the efficacy of nonviolent protest as well as the possible role of the international community.” Mohammed Deif, the commander of Hamas’s military wing, cited this disillusionment during last Saturday’s attack. “In light of the orgy of occupation and its denial of international laws and resolutions, and in light of American and Western support and international silence,” he declared, “we’ve decided to put an end to all this.”
Hamas — and no one else — bears the blame for its sadistic violence. But it can carry out such violence more easily, and with less backlash from ordinary Palestinians, because even many Palestinians who loathe the organization have lost hope that moral strategies can succeed. By treating Israel radically differently from how the United States treated South Africa in the 1980s, American politicians have made it harder for Palestinians to follow the A.N.C.’s ethical path. The Americans who claim to hate Hamas the most have empowered it again and again.
Israelis have just witnessed the greatest one-day loss of Jewish life since the Holocaust. For Palestinians, especially in Gaza, where Israel has now ordered more than one million people in the north to leave their homes, the days to come are likely to bring dislocation and death on a scale that should haunt the conscience of the world. Never in my lifetime have the prospects for justice and peace looked more remote. Yet the work of moral rebuilding must begin. In Israel-Palestine and around the world, pockets of Palestinians and Jews, aided by people of conscience of all backgrounds, must slowly construct networks of trust based on the simple principle that the lives of both Palestinians and Jews are precious and inextricably intertwined.
Israel desperately needs a genuinely Jewish and Palestinian political party, not because it can win power but because it can model a politics based on common liberal democratic values, not tribe. American Jews who rightly hate Hamas but know, in their bones, that Israel’s treatment of Palestinians is profoundly wrong must ask themselves a painful question: What nonviolent forms of Palestinian resistance to oppression will I support? More Palestinians and their supporters must express revulsion at the murder of innocent Israeli Jews and affirm that Palestinian liberation means living equally alongside them in safety and freedom.
From those reckonings, small, beloved communities can be born, and grow. And perhaps one day, when it finally becomes hideously clear that Hamas cannot free Palestinians by murdering children and Israel cannot subdue Gaza, even by razing it to the ground, those communities may become the germ of a mass movement for freedom that astonishes the world, as Black and white South Africans did decades ago. I’m confident I won’t live to see it. No gambler would stake a bet on it happening at all. But what’s the alternative, for those of us whose lives and histories are bound up with that small, ghastly, sacred place?
Like many others who care about the lives of both Palestinians and Jews, I have felt in recent days the greatest despair I have ever known. On Wednesday, a Palestinian friend sent me a note of consolation. She ended it with the words “only together.” Maybe that can be our motto.
#articles#definitely one of the best most extensive most personal most meaningful articles i've read this week#also addresses a LOT of uh. talking points recently
290 notes
·
View notes
Note
Since you haven't yet, could you please tell us your thoughts about the recent interview with Ai? After all, it seems to reveal a lot of interesting things about her.
For those who haven't read it yet, this is referring to the four-page in character interview with Ai that was published in the January 2024 issue of Da Vinci magazine!
Off the bat, it was really interesting to get such a direct and length look at Ai's public persona as it exists in OnK. Ironically enough, despite so much of the series being about people who are unable to get past her 'Ai of B-Komachi' mask, we actually don't get a ton of time spent with it as readers — we mostly see Ai in her private life, with Saitou, Miyako and the twins, where she is considerably more unfiltered and explicitly not on the job and we even get peeks directly into her POV from our perspective as out-of-universe observers. In fact, apart from the Da Vinci interview, the only other time we see Ai 'on the job' to this degree is a really quick exchange she has with a TV presenter just before her first post-hiatus performance. So it was really interesting to chew on!
The thing that stands out to me most from the interview is kind of a confirmation of something I've been saying for a long time — which is that Ai is a lot more honest than a lot of people (both in universe and in the fandom!) give her credit for. A lot of her answers are surprisingly frank and in line with what we know to be her true feelings and her more honest way of expressing herself elsewhere. Don't get me wrong, she's absolutely full of shit in plenty of spots here (EL OH EL ABOUT B-KOMACHI'S 'IRREPLACEABLE BOND') and her answers are still very polished and pretty, but there's a lot more of Ai herself here than I think even she herself would want to acknowledge.
This matches up with how Ai describes herself in 45510 — that, even though she's afraid of opening up, she does want people to know her as she really is and to accept her as such. It's interesting to see that expressed, even indirectly, through the interview like this.
It was also super cool to see a lot of my more incidental headcanons/personal interpretations confirmed! In particular, seeing Ai talk about Kana so warmly got me really excited. I'd always liked to imagine that she felt pretty fondly towards Kana and that she admired her hard work and dedication at such a young age so seeing Ai talking about her so effusively was really cute.
Less sweet was the confirmation that Ai's shitty home life in Ayumi's house stretched way back prior to Ayumi beginning to physically abuse her. Reading Ai calling herself a 'nasty brat' (almost definitely her mom's words) and then talking about her feeling so unwelcome at home that she'd sneak out of the house in the dead of night and wander around near the traintracks, daydreaming about being able to run away… it pains a really horrible image of what growing up in that house must have been like.
Speaking of parents, though… uh, wow, holy shit, Ai's dad! This is the only direct mention of him we've ever gotten and it definitely raises more questions than it answers. Prior to this, he'd been such a non-entity in Ai's life that I just kind of assumed he'd either passed away when she was very young or that he'd never been involved in her life — Ayumi is consistently referred to as her only parent to the point that, once she's out of the picture, Ai's only other option for stable family is, specifically, her mother's relatives. The idea of Ai being cared for by her dad or his side of the family is just never addressed as a possibility, so it's clear that past a certain point he was unable or unwilling to care for her.
The Da Vinci interview does imply she saw him occasionally — she describes their shopping trips as something that 'didn't happen often' — which supports the idea that he and Ayumi divorced or separated when Ai was quite young and he wasn't really involved in her life. It's honestly kind of depressing that he's the center of her happy childhood memory because like… man, it really says something about how abjectly unrelentingly dogshit her life was that "my dad sometimes took me to the grocery store" was happy enough in comparison to everything else in her life that she thought of it as a cherished memory.
Overall, the Da Vinci interview was a really nice surprise! We don't really get a lot of additional info about Ai from that time period specifically — a lot of the new reveals about her as a character tend to come from periods of her life prior to the timeline of the story, so getting a little extra peek into her final days really was a treat.
23 notes
·
View notes
Note
so uh. I am “Cis Boy Anon” I guess I’m being called now and I just wanted to. Apologize and clarify a bit for my previous confession. I already sent something like this, but it wasn’t posted I thought of a bunch of other stuff to say immediately afterward.
First, I am very sorry for any harm I may have caused. That was not my intention. I acted very childish.
Second. I at no point was trying to say I spoke for all cis people. I was sharing my own experience and opinion. It was a bad opinion, and am not trying to imply that anyone else shared anything like it.
Third. I was… in a bad headspace when I wrote that. I’ve grown kind of frustrated and disillusioned with this fandom recently, as every single time I’ve tried to share my thoughts and opinions they’ve just been ignored. I feel very left out of the discussion, and it has discouraged me from trying to actually join.
Fourth. I do not despise anyone for having trans headcanons. I have a couple of my own. But to see it be one of the only things talked about, and it being something that I didn’t really feel I could take part in, it caused me to feel a lot of unearned hate towards it.
Fifth and finally. About people “not wanting to hear the opinions of cis man”. That’s a me problem. I do not value my own opinions much and am afraid that I will be hated for them. It is something that I need to work on, and I should not have it about gender. That was very childish of me.
Anyway. I apologize for any harm I may have caused, and I thank you all for your patience.
P.S: “Go cry cis boy” is iconic.
Ok the first two point are fine but I want to address the rest:
#3 your frustration and feeling of being left out should not end up being left down too "I don't like people I having trans headcanons, you should listen to cis ppl instead". Idc that your "worded it badly", that's basically what you said
#4 I'm not sure where you're getting it being "one of the only things talked about", trans headcanons and headcanons in general are a big part of the fandom yes but that's how it is for most fandoms, but so much other stuff is talked in this fandom as well. Also just because you are cis doesn't mean you cannot at all partake and trans headcanons, as long as you're not lying or something and claiming "oh I'm the trans and see this character as trans bc it lines up with my experience" then you're fine
#5 it is not just childish if you to have said that. So many transphobes and queerphobes say stuff about how cis straight white men are the minority and aren't listen too. You were reiterating a transphobic idea
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
hiya there!! i follow you on twitter as well as here and i just wanted to say i really like all your toh analysis, it's absolutely fantastic—and, your thoughts also make me feel Not crazy for having so many issues with the writing in ftf 😭
like, the more i think on it the more weird i find it that hunters personal conflicts feel so largely brushed over, when like. in the episode he literally Fucking Died like an hour ago and everybody is just completely moving on. not to mention gus knowing hunter was a grimwalker is just moved on from the second after he says it which is still SO WEIRD???? and yeah yeah i know, the season was shortened, but how does that excuse this when the writers chose to put fuckin Boscha and Kikimora in the episode instead of address this or the characters we actually care about... (and this complaint also connects to your very good point about gus being sidelined)
i don't know, maybe more grimwalker things will be addressed in the finale, and maybe there'll be more gus there plus more acknowledgement of gus' plotline with the magic amplifier and how he Literally Saw belos' memories? but nothing was Ever done with that?? like a lot of hunter being a grimwalker (mostly in s3) feels so shoddily handled despite how much coolness and potential the concept has. it can only be hoped for i guess... idk. Tldr thanks for outlining how truly stranger and Poor the writing decisions for hunter (+ gus) were in ftf. and this is only a small part of it tbh 😭 but.. shrugs
Feel like all the things you listed and I have been talking about, are fortunately largely aknowledged by the fandom as issues so we aint so crazy thinking it.
But in any case, maybe ep 3 will prove us wrong and address all those issues, esp with how ambiguous Hunter's grimwalker arc has been lately. I am not sure what the writers want us to think about his powers and his eyes, as you prolly saw form my recent thread on twt. And some people have also derived all the wrong conclusions out of it (even saw a take where it was said that Hunter getting powers and diff eyes was making him a real boy and witch which is uh...yuck). So I hope this is clarified or the fandom will be pretty divided here I feel.
Also thanks for reading my silly little thoughts, here and on twt.
7 notes
·
View notes
Note
Your recent post has made me curious about your experience. I was an onlooker/lurker to Eddsworld until late March/Early April.
Man. Where do I even begin, genuinely
guess you can call this The Not So Extensive Neb Eddsworld Lore because. I have a LOT to talk about. It's been almost a decade I've seen pretty much everything despite having joined in like. Late 2013
I discovered Eddsworld back in 2012 via Flipnote Hatena (fly high sweet angel), and I never actually actively cared about the series until September 2013, when I decided to give the series a shot after snobbing it for so long: and lol I'm obsessed
Also since I'm funny as all hell I'm gonna address to different eras of my experience with the characters I was obsessed with at the moment
This is what I call my Tom Era: I wasn't on any actual social media yet, except for Sudomemo and DeviantArt, where I had multiple rps with people and got scolded by someone's sister over roleplaying (ya that happened and it's still funny as hell)
Jump to uh. Late 2014 - 2015 when I actually join Tumblr with my main (the ogs will know <3) and that's when I actually started being active in the fanbase and produce content, this is the uh. Matt and Eduardo era? Sure why not. I made a lot of content of them and I don't like talking about this moment bc of personal trauma sorry lol <3
The sasquatch drama happened in this fragment of time, and some might even remember that I've talked about it in this blog at some point
Anyway it's the pre The End - Legacy era, the fandom was really small and everyone pretty much knew the other for better or for worse
Oh I had a Matt ask blog. Don't look for it or I'll get you and I'll bite you
I got a Flipnote I made in 2015 reblogged by Tomska and I felt like my life was complete, and a fanart liked by Kreid (poweredd animator in case u forgot)
Shit happens and now we're in 2016, the fandom explodes, i have no FUCKING idea was was going on at first but man. Man if it wasn't kind of funny to watch
Anyway it's important to also note that I uh. Don't. Really remember a lot from 2016-2017, no idea why, maybe it's just my brain going full on traumatic amnesia mode and deleting everything. But also this post is wayy too long on its own so I'll cut it short
I made that one magical au? I was an emotionally charged undiagnosed teenager so maybe being so active on the internet wasn't a great idea, I got teased by a "cringe art" account for my au who got BLASTED within an hour of existing, I made the Salty AU in 2018 with the ask blog, joined Amino which was just. The worst idea I had in that year alone, joined the official server in 2019 only to leave everything related to eddsworld behind in 2020 because holy shit what was that ... Also there's an high change that Matt has seen my au but I talked about this already.
Then came back in 2021 and the rest is history. Matt Mod, Patryck hyperfixation, yeah you know it
I cut it VERY short bc there's. A lot I don't wanna talk about (just. Personal unpleasant experiences) but man. Man if I don't sound like a mad man talking about this, like dude I've spend sooo much time in the fanbase and I've seen sooo much shit going on, it's like as if I'm talking to a therapist about this or something
#ta dah. just another long post on mxttellion dot com whats new#i really tried to be brief here honestly#rxplies#out of ew#pxrsonal#txt pxst
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ok, so, I have another crossover idea.
Hyper light universe x Iconoclasts
For those who unaware about Hyper light universe's geography, since we got the map recently, here's a link to the post with official Hyper light drifter/breaker world map.
Personally, I feel like these two games have a somewhat similar vibe of a grimm story with bright, colorful visuals in a technologically advanced world. So I decided to do a "what if" and create an AU where these two games are actually in the same universe or, more specifically, on the same planet.
So, here's some of my ideas about it:
🔹As we know, the planet in Iconoclasts is a machine. And while it's never actually stated that World of light is also a machine-planet, I think it kinda is. Mainly because of the underground areas. Yes, the majority of them is probably build by people, but there are some places, both underground and on the surface, that don't really look like something a usual planet would have or like it was man-made. Like here:
The thing that caught my eye the most are those pink dots on the platforms. Almost like they are mechanical.
Another thing are those, uh, collums? from the ground that we see and sometimes can remove by pressing a button
(collums on the right top, button beside the boxes on the left bottom)
And also we have senes like this
In a lot of places, man-made or not.
So, yeah, I think World of light is also (at least kinda) a machine-planet. And in this crossover AU both of Iconoclasts's and Hyper light's planets are actually one and the same.
🔹In this crossover I also think about a prospect that the planet is not only a machine, but a living one. Which uses a hologram to communicate with it's people... A hologram in the form of a jackal.
🔹The planet has two names depends on the context. World of light — when talking about it as just a planet with it's population. Anubis — when talking about him as a sentient god-machine-like being and when you directly address him. So yeah, Anubis is a he/it.
🔹 Hyper light is kind of Anubis's blood and the actuall natural energy source, not Ivory. Ivory is the thing that supposed to produce it, but humans from Iconoclasts don't know that. Which is the reason why artificial creatures in Hyper light drifter (like the Drifter himself) can live just fine while humans in Iconoclasts not only die from Ivory most of the time, but even if they manage to become agents — it comes with massive disadvantages.
🔹 The whole "Immortal Cell" tragedy happened before humans from Iconoclasts arrived on World of light and that is the reason why Anubis in his weakened state didn't do anything to them. However, he placed a barrier that basically separated World of light in half (the map of Hyper light universe is the half where the natives live and the map of Iconoclasts is the half where humans live).
🔹 Anubis can make his own "agents" but without disadvantages the human agents have by resurrecting them after death using his blood (which is Hyper light by one of the previous statements). Alternate is one of them. And Drifter with Guardian soon will be too. However, he can't do that with humans since they aren't native to World of light... Unless they would have something from the planet in them for a looong time for Anubis to be able to detect their soul.
🔹 Another Anubis's "agent" is the birdman that pilots the Starworm. Anubis sent him to watch over the humans.
🔹One Concern knows about the barrier existence, but has no idea why it's here and what's on the other side.
🔹Robin's adventure happens more or less at the same time as Drifter's.
🔹At some point when Robin decides to destroy the One Concern Anubis starts to help her the same way he helps Drifter. No one can see the jackal besides her.
🔹 Royal survived because Anubis holded the detector of the door by appearing right next to it.
🔹After some time when both Drifter's and Robin's adventures are over Anubis takes down the barrier. He also decides to resurrect as his "agent" and help one human being that lived for so long and had a massive refusal to die...
#au#crossover#hyper light drifter#hyper light universe#iconoclasts#robin#royal#the drifter#the guardian#alternate#hld#the jackal#anubis
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
i was inspired by a youtube video, so introducing
Magnet's Media Mreviews
Red Faction Guerrilla Re-mars-stered and Fast and the Furious (2001)
So lets start by addressing the elephant in the room. Neither of these are kids movies and one of them isn't even a movie. this is because I want to transition this series from "maddie wants to review a whole series" and transition it to "hey this is something I've consumed recently, here are my thoughts formatted like a casual review" both because the serious reviews are harder to write, and because I like writing and like sharing my opinions on things but I've made both too scary in my mind. so yeah not just movies, lets review an xbox 360 game.
Red Faction Guerrilla was an xbox 360 generation open world third person shooter about doing revolution on mars. The remake is the same, though prettier. I realize this is an awkward review to start this relaunched series with, if i said that was intentional would you believe me? the game mostly revolves around the player as mason lastname (no relation) doing odd jobs for the Red Faction, blow up a building, blow up a lot of buildings, blow up a guy... most of this game is blowing something up for somebody. This is because at the time of release, red faction guerrilla was showing off some extremely cool destructible environment and building technology, and they knew what they had was cool and satisfying enough to build a whole game around. This leads to a game that plays well, side quests that lead into story progress that lead into side quests, satisfying gameplay loops, and one of the only games I know that looks worse than it is to play. Sure it has problems, its a ps360 open world game set on a desert planet, it comes with problems, but satisfying gameplay isn't one of them.
On the subject of problems, the story might as well not exist, the music is unmemorable, there are maybe 6 high quality cut scenes in the game and most of them have to do with a racist, native martian scavengers that the game sets up for a long time and then it turns out to be a jingoist caricature of a vague "native" culture that probably should've been cut. the weapons never get as crazy as you'd hope, mostly just different rocket launchers and normal guns, moving around without a car is a pain, the game penalizes you if a civilian npc dies in the same zip code but game good so 7/10
memorable bits: big hammer, dust gun, the terrible propaganda billboards, jenkins the old man that lets you blow stuff up in his car, the call of duty modern warfare missions right at the end, the sequel
fast and the furious
oh my god I'm so much more comfortable talking about a movie. the fast and the furious is a movie about a guy named brian trying to be a guy with a fast car named brian, he wants to get in with another group with vin deasil's character dom, but uh oh, brian's actually a cop, is he going to choose being a cop or being a racer, watch the movie to find out what he chooses just forget about the sequels.
Speaking of forgetting about sequels, what is this plot? so dom and his gang are stealing tvs and dvd players and selling them on the street, and brian is trying to get in with them, to see if they're doing it, in addition to illegal street racing, which they're also doing but that's not a good enough crime. So then brian has to get closer and closer to dom, while examining other racers to see if they did it, and getting close to dom's group while hiding from them also. And the big race "Race Wars" is going on and they wanna win the big race and its actually not that important despite this being a car movie. It's almost notable in how un-notable this "undercover cop who might defect" plot is, except theres also 10 sequels??? and a spinoff? like what do we need to know, where the one guy gets his ADD meds? how many gangs is he going undercover for? you'd think they'd recognize him after a point. or oh shit wait maybe the next movie is about completely different characters and they're all just car movies. anyway I got distracted but the movie's boring 5/10
memorable bits: racism, sexism, homophobia, uh dom's shitty friend who's homophobic and is also dating dom's sister which you'd think he would have a problem with, race wars, brian's shitty cop handler that sucks, the snoozer of a climax, brian maybe dying at the end
#magnet's movie mreviews#magnet's media mreviews#fast and the furious#red faction guerrilla#review#movie review
1 note
·
View note
Text
Do people have head canons about concept albums?
Anyway, I've long heard people talk about how Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band isn't a complete concept album; that after the first two songs it doesn't pick its thread back up until the title track reprise. More recently, however, I've come around to the idea that, y'know, maybe it doesn't?
The Lonely Hearts Club Band are supposed to be an alter-ego for The Beatles, right? Well, to me, this has always been an album by Sgt. Pepper's called Beatles. Why did they pick that name? I'unno, but anyway, yeah, this is an album by Sgt. Pepper's, and these are all songs they'd write. It's kind of like Cruising With Ruben & The Jets, if you've heard that one.
And bringing up Zappa, I imagine that's why there are songs on here with crowd noises; those are live tracks mixed in with the studio tracks. Maybe even they're that ahead of their time and some of these songs are live tracks with overdubs like Zappa would do. Now, I don't know what number album this is that they're only now including their title song, but I'unno. Maybe it wasn't something they wrote until a while after they started, or maybe it's always strictly been a live concert intro that they never felt the need to include on an album until there'd been such a fan demand for it. Or, maybe, it flowed so well into "With A Little Help From My Friends" that they figured, "Ah, screw it."
Speaking of that, there's the discrepency of Billy Shears. If he's "the singer," why does he only sing one song? The way I see it, he's not a member of the band; he's a guest singer. Like, I'unno, Roy Harper on Pink Floyd's "Have A Cigar". Could be something they wrote together and decided to let Shears sing. Hell, maybe "the singer" in the title track is adustiable for whoever sings the song after it—even if their last name doesn't rhyme with "years." Like, I'unno, the idea that Billy Shears has to be the lead singer... The only two things I see backing that up are the Yellow Submarine movie and the Sgt. Pepper's movie, and, like, I'unno. The Yellow Submarine movie had to come up with a lot of stuff outside of the song it was named after, so that could just be its own thing, for one, and that's not even bringing up the question of if we should treat the Frampton/Bee Gees movie as any sort of authority.
One last thing I wanna address, and this is something I thought up as I was typing this—the Beatles on the album cover. As in, the mop top Beatles, to the right. How's that explained? Uh, those could be Johnny & The Moondogs in this universe, I guess. And if we're following my logic, I suppose that would also make "Hello, Goodbye" a Sgt. Pepper's song since they wore the costumes for the music video, and the mop top four even make a cameo?
But, yeah, the point of this post is: Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band is a band. Big surprise. A different one from The Beatles, anyway. And none of them are Barry Gibb.
#text#rambling#music#headcanon#concept album#the beatles#sgt peppers lonely hearts club band#i could think through this a lot better or i could just get it out there and i clearly chose the latter
0 notes
Text
Episode 2 transcript
[00:00:01.470] - Speaker 1
All right. Welcome back to another episode of Wiseguy Wisdom. My name is Noah.
[00:00:05.550] - Speaker 2
And this is, uh, Cappy.
[00:00:07.890] - Speaker 1
Yeah. So, um, today, um, this is actually going to be a really interesting episode. We're going to talk about, um, you know, culture capital and its important Sopranos. Um, since The Sopranos whole big shtick is that it deals with Italian Americans, but, like, not in like the, you know, the traditional like, oh, like like like my point is they address like themselves and so like they address like the stereotypes and whatever in the show. But, um, I think it's also like, like important to notice how, um, you know, even though it is fictional, it still takes place in modern times in like a pretty realistic setting. Um, and I feel like David Chase, um, the show's creator, who also grew up in, like, Italian northern Jersey, acknowledges that, you know, he shows like, the guys hanging at the deli, you know, he shows the guys at like the strip club. You know, he shows like all this stuff, the jewelry, the jewelry.
[00:01:07.290] - Speaker 1
Yeah. You know, like, uh, like stuff falling off of trucks, you know, and like, stuff like that, you know? Um, but, um, no, I feel like it's it's really important because it says, you know, about more about, like, not even stereotyping, but like, um, you know, where does he get these? I like ideas and concept from, like, are they just stereotypes or are there, like, you know, some people who could be like, yeah, that's pretty much what we do, you know, like, so because there have been people, you know, there have been like, um, actual like real. I've seen videos like real gangsters and like show how accurate The Sopranos show is. And some of them say it's a little bit like it's a little bit stretched, but, um, some of it's pretty accurate.
[00:01:47.670] - Speaker 2
Yeah. For sure. Um, so I feel like for, for the culture aspect, um, um, Sopranos definitely hits it on key with even when like are they film of like like like the New York family. Like I feel like that's super key as well. And even when they do like like the construction contracts, like, like even if you look today in, like some major cities, like the Italians like a control a lot of those big contracts, though, and like, like the unions still, for the most part, are ran by Italians. But like the Italians ran everything back then. And I feel like just until, like very recently, until, you know, like a lot of them are starting to like to, like, die off now and like, not as many, um, like, like younger generation Italian kids are, are like, um, going into the life and a lot of them are choosing school and stuff. And nowadays I feel that it's just getting less and less.
[00:02:50.040] - Speaker 2
But I feel at the time of The Sopranos and even before the Italians ran most, um, industries and unions. Yeah.
[00:02:58.710] - Speaker 1
No. And like going off that like I do have the youth, um, like a part of the show is like, you know, I think it was in season one when like, Metal Strap just has. Are you in the Mafia? Oh my God, you know, like big point in the show. Um, and, you know, she's just a kid in the early 2000, you know, like, she doesn't really know much about this mafia stuff. But it's interesting because I've, like, met, like, like people in real life who they're like, oh, yeah, like like, that's like a joke. You know, I'm like, oh, you're Italian. You have any family in the mob? They're like, oh yeah. No, we, I have like grandparents and great uncles and shit. I'm like, yeah. I'm like, oh, so what about they're like, I can't tell you, right? So this is like an actual like decently good representation of like, you know, how they deal like the Italian culture like deals with it.
[00:03:49.230] - Speaker 1
And um, another thing is like they, um, you know, obviously, you know, you're not going to see like, like, like Paulie Walnuts, like walking around like a guy in a tracksuit, you know? But there are like like, listen, growing up in North Jersey myself, I have seen, like and heard about like even just heard about in the news, like actual like Rico cases, you know, like involving these like mobs through like, money laundering and, you know, just drugs. Drugs like like grand like grand larceny. Yeah. So like to my knowledge, it's not that far off. Like, yes, it's a fictional show, but it's very like he puts it in this almost, like, hyper realistic world. Yeah.
[00:04:37.020] - Speaker 2
And like, I know that some of the, um, like, like actors did, like, have, like some mafia experience, I know.
[00:04:46.200] - Speaker 1
So yeah, there was literally um, I saw it was on a talk show. It was one of the cast members of Sopranos. He said he got a call in the middle of the night, and they didn't say who it was from. They just said, um. They said, listen, we've seen your work.
[00:05:03.050] - Speaker 2
Guys don't.
[00:05:03.530] - Speaker 1
Wear white. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. He said, listen, we've seen your work. We like what you're doing. But let me give you one thing. Why these guys don't wear shirt, which is like like when I first saw it and I first heard that, I'm like, oh my God. They actually, you know, are acknowledging it like, they're like realizing how they're representing the Italian culture. Um, you know, in like almost praising it, um, which is a very strong thing, especially coming from the mob itself. Right.
[00:05:33.830] - Speaker 2
Definitely. And like, um, yeah, obviously, I think a big thing too, that we can touch on is how the FBI. Yeah, I kind of, um, like, infiltrates these, like, families and stuff. Yeah.
[00:05:52.100] - Speaker 1
Yeah. No, it's, um, and it's interesting because, like, the FBI, um, in the show, they're like a very prominent force. Um, they literally, you know, um, like, almost like, disguise themselves, kind of doing, like a almost like a sting operation. Um, like they'll be like, hey, how's it going? You know, we know you're kind of in the mob, but we're going to be, like, very discreet about this. Like like in the show, you know, they're they're literally getting advice from Tony and his gang about, like, foreign, like, Pakistani terrorists because they're working for Homeland security. I've heard of that actually happening. Um, friends of, um, of my family, um, who have relatives have said that the FBI will literally sometimes like, well, they didn't like they couldn't really out themselves like, as crime. But they said that we they're like, yeah, we've had FBI people and come in and been like, do you have any information?
[00:06:48.080] - Speaker 1
Because wink, wink, we kind of know what you're up to.
[00:06:52.010] - Speaker 2
Yeah. And like I feel like the parts who we're like Tony, like the mob boss, like he gave, um, like the two FBI agents. Like, like information about about like about, like, uh, um, terrorism and stuff and like, obviously. Yeah. I feel like if you ever got, like, like, prosecuted and stuff like, like who, who knows if if that would even help him out in, in court and like, even to, like, um, the omerta like code, you know, where like, like the code of, like, silence and stuff. Yeah, I feel that. I don't know, like if if mobsters would actually like, like, like help it the FBI. I like that, you know, but I mean, who knows? I mean, anything's possible with this stuff. Yeah.
[00:07:38.960] - Speaker 1
Um, another thing I want to point out is because I actually have a lot of, like, personal, uh, good friends who are from, um, you know, very traditionalist Italian families. Um, from the family aspect, I would say they get a lot of it. Very accurate. You know, they're like the Italian, like, family dynamic. They're very close, you know, they're very family oriented. Um, they're very loud. Um, but also, um, you know, I feel like the show does a good job about, like, you know, showing how to, like, really care about, like, your children and like, cause in the show, the whole thing is, like, we don't want this life for our children, right? Yeah. They try and keep it as separate as they can. Um, but, like, you know, at the end of the day, they're just regular families, like, you know, we see Tony like, going to his son's football game and cheering him on.
[00:08:23.510] - Speaker 1
You know, they have the giant Christmas dinner. Yeah.
[00:08:26.510] - Speaker 2
Um, Sunday.
[00:08:27.560] - Speaker 1
Sunday, Sunday dinner. Right. And they like, you know, they're, um, one of his cousin. His like, babies communion is like a big thing. So I would say from the family aspect, it's very good. Spot on, spot on. Yeah. All right, well, thank you. And we'll see you in the next episode.
0 notes
Note
I saw recently you said that you dont like the current version of akane, and I honestly agree. But what are your reason you dont like post tb akane
Hello anon, sorry for the wait!!! I have actually been pecking at the response for this all week because it ended up dovetailing into some of my broader thoughts and issues with the manga using my feelings about Akane's characterization as a sort of lens/jumping off point. I hope this is still interesting to read even though it took forever to answer lol.
I also want to note that the bulk of this post was written before chapter 128! Some of my issues that are mentioned in this post did get sort of poked at and paid some lipservice in a way that makes me hopeful we'll get some improvement on this stuff as the movie arc progresses. Think of this as 'my pre-128 thoughts' if you come across it in like a post chapter 130 world in the distant future. It's also uh fucking long (it was over 2000 words long when I stopped counting.....) so enjoy this mini essay???
To get my most neutral thoughts out of the way up front, Akane is a character I really like in LoveNow! I think the arc she's given is compelling and her struggles feel super real. The gradual peeling back of her outer layers and the reveal that she's just as damaged by the industry as the people around her was really good and my only real major problem with LN is that I felt like the aftermath of her suicide attempt (at least, emotionally speaking) was glossed over a bit too quickly for my liking. On top of that, I like a lot of ideas about TB Akane on paper and I'm not inherently against any of the things that get put on the table in relation to her. My issues are more to do with the ways Akasaka executes said ideas and – imo – fails to capitalize on a lot of the interesting potential that a character like Akane presents.
I think this issue partially stems from the fact that Akane and Memcho were (iirc anyway) not actually originally intended to stick around with the main cast past the LoveNow arc. Memcho didn't really have a personal arc during LoveNow and during the rest of the manga, she sort of has a "flat" arc, so I think she makes the transition a lot more gracefully. Which is not to say Memcho herself is a flat character lol! Rather a 'flat' arc is when a character doesn't necessarily have some major change in themselves, but their intrinsic traits/beliefs/etc help to advance the arcs of characters around them; sort of like a mentor type character, if that helps.
Akane, by contrast, had a pretty dynamic character arc that felt as though it was intended to be relatively self contained and conclusive but with Akasaka's plans changing behind the scenes, Akane has ended up sort of outlasting the arc she was originally set up to have. That's not to say a character can't still be relevant after their arc is done or that a character needs an active ongoing arc to work within a story but there's a lot of things about the way that arc is simply not resolved that bug me – for example, the arc wrap makes a big point of saying that Akane will probably have to deal with ongoing online negativity for the rest of her career but this never comes up again even in places where it really should be relevant. I also just personally am not a big fan of how quickly and completely Akane's suicide attempt gets swept under the rug and is literally never addressed again once LoveNow wraps but that's more of an issue with OnK's bad habit of dropping loose threads a whole than it is something specific to Akane.
As for the rest of it… uh, this might be a bummer to see in the main tag if Akane is your Oshi no Girlie so I'll put the rest of my thoughts behind a cut. Akane enjoyers, please feel free to pretend I'm just talking about my favourite ice cream flavours or something. Or even go get some ice cream yourself and say it's on me. I don't care if it's October, ice cream is a forever food!!!
SO… To get the most immediate and shallow points off the table first, I just find the character design change between LoveNow and TB Akane really jarring lol. Like, I guess it's not necessarily impossible for her hair to have grown down to her chest in the time between LoveNow and when she pops back up but that combined with the changes in how she starts being characterized really just widen that gulf. The only time she ever really feels like LoveNow Akane to me again is when she takes Aqua to see a 2.5D play and is just so happy afterwards that he enjoyed it – that's cute! That's charming! That's the Akane I liked a lot in LoveNow and I feel like we don't really see her again after that but it's hard to put my finger on what feels so off. It's kind of just Vibes.
Getting into more serious, structural stuff a big part of why I feel post-TB Akane falls flat for me is simply that a lot of the interesting things Aka put on the table for her during LoveNow have been swept away and ignored. There are so many things that could be done with Akane as a character that are absolutely screaming out with incredible thematic potential but Akasaka hasn't really taken advantage of any of them. At the worst points of the manga, it feels like she's being used as a blunt force tool to make the plot go at the speed Akasaka wants it to progress and this has resulted in Akane spending a good chunk of the story doing literally nothing on-panel that doesn't revolve around Aqua in some way. Everything else – her rivalry with Kana, her passion for acting, her relationship with her family and her manager – is paid the barest bits of lipservice if it's even acknowledged at all but when you really get down to the nitty gritty of what Akane meaningfully engages with and achieves in most arcs now exclusively has to do with Aqua.
It's not inherently a bad thing for a character to be motivated by outside factors or for their actions to be driven by devotion or even hatred for somebody else – Aqua himself is a good example of a character whose arc is driven by both of these things, as his devotion to Ai and hatred for the man who hurt her are the main external things driving him through pretty much the entire story so far. But Aqua also has things going on outside of this – other important connections and relationships, feelings and conflicts and motivations that make him feel, imo, more well realized. Not only that, but his arc has a very well conveyed and easy to understand "want vs need" conflict, of his continued pursuit of revenge having clear and tangible friction with his emotional need to let go of his past trauma and move on.
Akane has, since Tokyo Blade, been sorely lacking in a lot of these areas. Her acting career progresses entirely offscreen with no apparent conflict or effort on her part and she has absolutely no strong or meaningful connections to the cast outside of Aqua and arguably Kana, but they haven't really had any sort of meaningful or meaty interactions since way back around, what, the mid-70s, in chapter terms? Not only that but her existing relationships have largely been completely put to the wayside, too. LoveNow establishes her as a person who cares deeply for the people who care for her – her mom, her manager, her friends on the show. Akane felt so bad about people saying bad things about her mom and her manager online – not even harassment actually directed at them, or that we have any reason to believe they saw or received! – that it contributed to her suicide attempt. Contrast this to when she is literally about to walk off and attempt a literal actual fucking murder and all she's thinking is "aqua… let's have crepes together… let's be together forever…". No consideration for her parents, who are about to go through unimaginable pain, or the promising acting career she's about to destroy? Nope! Akane revolves entirely around Aqua now. It feels insulting!
I don't even necessarily hate or even disagree with taking Akane in the direction of her fixating on Aqua in response to him saving her and feeling like she has to cling to him and throw away her life to 'save' him in return. I do think the story is purposely portraying this as an unhealthy fixation and does not want us to uncritically celebrate this aspect of their relationship but I also just think the story kind of fails to really examine Akane to the logical conclusion of that flaw.
In general, Akane is one of those characters who like… I don't quite know how to express this feeling so forgive me if I go in circles on this topic a bit, but there are occasions where Akane will do or say something genuinely shitty or deranged or display a pattern of behaviour that speaks clearly to a flaw of hers in ways I want to be on board and engaged with but as time passes, it becomes clear that the narrative does not actually see anything wrong with what just happened and so it never gets addressed or meaningfully engaged with. There's a lot of little bits like this (can we talk about how Akane leveraged her suicide attempt against Aqua as a manipulation technique in TB and this never comes up again?? lol???) but the thing that really truly sticks in my craw is the way Akane is repeatedly depicted as continuing to use her fake 'Aikane' persona (as conveyed by the star eyes) during her acting career and starts getting famous at least partially because of it.
This is going to sound really dramatic but as someone who deeply, deeply cares about Ai and is so, so compelled by the tragedy that was her exploitation in life and death – this is so horrifying! This is Akane directly profiting off her exploitation of Ai's image. This is Akane digging up Ai's corpse so she can rip out her guts and parade around wearing them. It is absolutely baffling to me that the story at no point pauses to at least acknowledge that this is another way in which Ai is being exploited even in death – that even now, almost twenty years later, she cannot ever escape or be left to rest in peace as a human being.
Honestly Akane's relationship to Ai is SUCH a mountain of missed opportunities it makes me kind of crazy. Like, we get some wishy-washy stuff about ~Ai's emotions that were revived in her~ but seemingly the only thing done with that is to give Akane a cheat code to magically know things about the mystery she should have no reasonable way of deducting. But like - if Akane really does understand Ai so completely and it's so empathetic that she can Sherlock scan the emotions of a dead woman she had never met then why does she never, you know… express any kind of opinion on her? What does Akane think of Ai? What does she think about the way Ai was exploited and abused by the very industry Akane is trying to break into? Holy shit! It should be SO obvious to draw a parallel between Ai's death at the hands of a ex-fan and Akane's suicide attempt driven by fan harassment. But Akane just… never talks about Ai or even really treats her like a person even though she apparently downloaded Ai into her brain by reading Wikipedia really hard.
It's frustrating because there SHOULD be a really great thematic idea here - other characters often treat Ai as this inscrutable enigma but with Akane, there was the opportunity to make a point that Ai was just a lonely, messed up person and that if Akane can come to understand and connect with her post mortem then the people in her life absolutely could have put in the effort to understand and connect with her while she was still alive. The story failing to have Akane treat Ai even the slightest bit like a person ends up making her feel really callous in a way that was clearly not intentional and is, as a result, frustrating to read. This also comes into play in the ways she's so tunnel visioned on Aqua. Like, there's just something really darkly funny about Akane acknowledging how insanely unimaginably tragic the horror of Ai's death is and the way the people closest to her were robbed of the opportunity to publicly heal and grieve and then she just... totally fails to acknowledge Ruby also experienced this life altering trauma? LIKE
"your little sister is on her own, though"
To be clear, Akane being callous and kind of tunnel-visioned is not in of itself something I have a problem with. As a Category 5 Women's Wrongs Enjoyer (my list of favourite fictional women includes Monika DDLC, Akane Shinjo and Junko Enoshima lol) so I actually think Akane having those sorts of nastier flaws or at least having blinders up that make her behave in such a way that contrasts her actually heart would be so good and juicy! It would be a really good opportunity to dig into ideas of like... someone can go through something horrible that negatively impacts them and maybe even makes them behave in poor and destructive ways, but just because someone isn't a 100% pure and sympathetic 'perfect' victim doesn't at all take away from the fact that they were victimized and they still deserve to be helped and protected. But because the story seems to be largely unaware that Akane comes off like this, it fails to be meaningfully engaged with which, again, makes it frustrating to read.
I do have hope that a lot of these issues will be resolved, though! The AquAkane breakup finally forcefully ripped her out of the role of 'Aqua's Perfect Girlfriend' and while she's still orbiting him a bit more than I necessarily would like, chapter 128 has already done a lot to address some of these issues. Even stuff as small as Akane talking to Memcho and Kana and not really having any page time with Aqua and her acknowledging that both Aqua and Ruby (with particular emphasis on Ruby, it seems!) are both still suffering in the aftermath of their childhood trauma. It's small, but a lot of my issues with Akane were of the 'death by a thousand cuts' variety so even having them addressed in these passing ways does a lot to help.
Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if I eventually come around on Akane and end up liking her a lot more. I've sort of had similar feelings about characters in works I like before – off the top of my head, I remember really disliking Naoto from Persona 4 when I first played the game because the section of the story she's associated with has some really bullshit pacing and Naoto is used in some really awkward ways by the narrative that made me associate those feelings of frustration with her. I felt similarly about Megumi from 13 Sentinels where I felt like some of the beats in her story dragged down both her arc and the arcs of the characters associated with her and really disliked her as a result. Upon revisiting both games though, I was able to properly separate my feelings of frustration with the narrative from the characters themselves and ended up coming around on both of them in a huge way.
Once Oshi no Ko wraps and we can see what Akane's arc looks like in its entirety, I fully expect to have a similar turnaround on her. I don't expect that she'll ever be one of my favourite characters but once we can see the totality of her character arc and the full scope of her role in the story, I expect to find more appreciation for her. Right now, though, while I'm still sort of stewing in disappointment, hope, expectation and frustrations it's hard to fully come around on her.
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
writing
Hey I have an urge to write to procrastinate schoolwork, my very favorite thing to do. I am a professional at this point. At procrastinating that is my writing is subpar, and I have been told present tense first person sucks. I can't be assed to learn a new way of writing tho so,,, anyways two questions 1) would anyone want to Read something I wrote and 2) what would you want me to write. like toss out a concept or something I can probably roll with it. if I haven't already written it I've got maybe 250 stories sitting in my note app (a couple are even finished) and at least 30 of them are lifesteal bc I brainrotted very hard. anyways if you wanna answer you can shoot me an ask or reblog or something lol
(oh also ive been wanting to address this so why not now, my way of talking/humor is A LOT of deadstops and exaggerating emotions and I never realized until recently it could come off as like, not fun? bad at explaining, sorry. but uh this lil side note is to say I'm never genuinely upset over anything or anything like that, and on the rare occasion i might be ill like mention it or something? Ya boi just bases its humor in exaggerated emotions and fullstops, and I think I got at least half of it from Techno haha he was a part of my life for like 6 years or something like that so I got a lotta speaking mannerisms from him)
#chatwithcat#im just gonna use that for when I'm not talking about anything else in particular#just realized i never posted this its been sitting in my drafts since august 30th LMAO
0 notes
Text
My Friend’s Father (Part Seven)
Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader
Warning: Age Gap, Smut
Words: 4,498
Notes:
I have decided to make this into a series.
Alright, no judgment. This was a dream of mine and I felt like I had to write it down. Everyone in this Fic is over the age of 18 and this Fic is in no way based on Cillian’s real family life. It’s pure filth.
*********
Throughout the entire night, you couldn’t help but think about Cillian. You dreamed about the kiss you shared, the touch of his hands on your face and even the scent of his skin.
You knew you shouldn’t think this way about your best friend’s father but it was something you couldn’t control even though you were angry with him.
But there was one person you who you were even more angry with and this was Connor, the man you were actually dating.
You got up early that morning to confront Connor about his behaviour at the art gallery opening and the truth was that you were pretty much done with him. You never had feelings for him in the first place and the truth was that he had simply become a distraction for you. You wanted to distract yourself from having taken a liking in your best friend’s father which, in itself, you knew was wrong.
Connor embarrassed you in front of your friends and Cillian was right when he said that he was acting controlling, even though you didn’t want to hear it, especially not from him.
You knew you had to end it and you knew that it wasn’t going to be a difficult task for you. You had always been a strong woman and you didn’t want to be with someone like that and, just when you arrived at Connor’s house you took a deep breath and did what had to be done.
‘It’s your loss Y/N’ were his words when you eventually left his house after a ten minute conversation but you didn’t feel like you had lost anything. In fact, you’ve gained something and that was experience in standing up for yourself.
***
Just after you encounter with Connor that morning, you went to have breakfast with Denise and her friends at the G Hotel in Galway.
They were all staying at the five-star hotel, courtesy of Denise’s father who had organised the weekend for Denise for her birthday and as a reward for her achievements after she had worked so hard on her project.
‘Happy Birthday’ you said as you greeted her and the others and Denise immediately told you off for being too loud as her head was pounding. It was obvious to you that she was rather hungover from the night the before.
‘You had too much champaign, huh?’ you giggled before handing her the present you had bought for her.
You usually didn’t spend much money on each other for birthdays but, since she was your best friend, you had spent a few hours’ worth in wages and gotten her something meaningful.
She was collecting vintage tea-cups and you had recently found a beautiful Royal Dalton set in a second-hand shop which you knew she would adore.
‘This is absolutely beautiful, thank you so much’ Denise said as she unwrapped it before hugging you gently.
‘You are welcome. I knew you would like it’ you said with a warm smile and, just as you did and sat down next to her, your mobile phone went off.
You received a text message from a number that was unfamiliar to you and when you opened it, you were none the wiser.
‘It was good to see you’ the message said and you were rather confused by it. You had some job interviews recently and wondered whether this was sent by one of the interviewers. Or perhaps someone from university, you wondered?
‘What is it?” Denise asked as she saw the look of confusion on your face when you glanced at your phone.
‘Someone just send me a message saying that it was good to see me’ you chuckled before explaining to her that you didn’t know the number.
‘Maybe it is this guy from university you were talking about a few weeks back? You know, the lecturer in the science department?’ Denise wondered before suggesting to you that you should text back and ask for a name, but you already knew it wouldn’t be him. There was no way he would have your number and you certainly were no longer interested in getting to know him after you had found out that he was married.
You texted back to the unknown number, enquiring who this was and, within a couple of seconds, your phone went off again and you almost choked on your coffee.
‘Cillian’ the message read and you quickly changed the angle of your phone so that Denise wouldn’t see it.
‘And? Who is it?’ she asked while trying to look at your phone.
‘Uhm…just a guy I met a few weeks ago…I ran into him again yesterday morning and I totally forgot about it…’ you stammered quickly but Denise didn’t buy a word you were saying.
‘You forgot?’ she giggled, winking at you as she did and your cheeks blushed almost instantly. ‘Well, he obviously didn’t and you must have given him your number for a reason. Is he hot? What’s he like? I need to know everything…’ she went on to say as, suddenly, without you haven’t sent anything back to Cillian, you received yet another text message from him.
‘For what its’s worth, you looked beautiful’ the next text read and you couldn’t help but smile as you continued to sip on your cup of coffee and Denise most certainly noticed the look on your face and asked you what he said.
‘Just that I looked nice’ you stammered, feeling awful about lying to her about who texted you but there was no way that you could have told her that it was, in fact, her father who you were texting with.
‘Uh, he likes you’ Denise then giggled before carrying on. ‘Well, since you ditched Connor now, you should go and meet up with him and have some fun. After Connor’s one-off ten-minute performance, I have no doubt that you really need it’ Denise said and, just as she did, the conversation across the breakfast table took a turn. Like so often, it now was all about sex and you realised that dissatisfaction was a common occurrence in women your age.
‘I believe that the whole talk about the female g-spot is load of rubbish. It’s a myth’ Amalie observed eventually after everyone across the table complained about the lovers that they had.
It was at this point that you mentally checked out from the conversation and, whilst you thought about the one pleasurable experience you had in your life when it came to sex, you certainly didn’t want to talk about it in front of Denise. Especially not Denise.
Instead of engaging in talks about vibrators and the male anatomy, you decided to respond to Cillian’s text messages after you had received yet another one, telling you that he was sorry. Clearly, he was desperate to hear from you.
‘I see, you kept my note?’ you responded quickly, ignoring his compliments and apologies, and, just moments after you sent it, you received a response from him.
‘Kept it in my wallet. Can we meet?’ Cillian asked and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes just before you received yet another message from him which read ‘BTW this is not a booty call. I just want to talk with you. Please.’
His message made you laugh but you agreed to meet him nonetheless.
‘I have an apartment at the Docks. Can you come there?’ Cillian asked in his next text message.
‘Alright. How does 4 o’clock sound? Text me your address’ you texted back and it wasn’t long until Cillian sent you the address of his apartment.
‘And?’ Denise asked as she watched you text with the mysterious stranger and you simply blushed again and responded with a short and somewhat embarrassed ‘nothing’.
‘Oh common, tell me Y/N. I am your best friend’ she then said and you confirmed that you would quickly meet up with him this afternoon before Denise’s birthday dinner.
‘Oh la la, you are having a date’ Denise then said somewhat excitedly.
‘We are just catching up to talk Denise. It’s not a date’ you then said.
‘Sure…whatever you say Y/N’ she then said sarcastically which is when, finally, she backed off and you received yet another text message from Cillian.
‘Looking forward to see you, xx’ it read and your heart skipped a beat pretty much then and there.
***
After you went home to have a shower and get changed into some nice jeans and a black shirt as well as some nice lingerie (just in case) you made your way to Cillian’s apartment.
You parked around the corner and walked the rest of the way just to be sure that no one would see your car being parked there.
‘Jesus’ you said somewhat surprised when you walked into the lobby of the apartment building and took the elevator to the top floor after Cillian had buzzed you inside. You had never been to a building like this. It was luxurious and right on the harbour.
When you arrived on the top floor, Cillian already waited for you, glancing through the door of his apartment.
‘Wow, these are some good views. Do you own this place?’ you observed as you stepped inside and set your purse on the desk by the door.
‘Yeah, bought it a few years ago’ Cillian said as you began to shrug off your jacket, but Cillian came up from behind you, and caught your hands. You looked down at your hands, noticing that yours dwarfed in his. They were warm and soft.
‘Let me take this for you’ he said like a gentleman and you were somewhat surprised by his gesture. This was not something you were used to but you liked it, a lot.
‘You know, I didn’t expect that you would text me, especially not after last night. So, what is it that you want to talk about?’ you asked nervously and, just as you did, Cillian cut straight to the chase.
‘I wanted to tell you, in person, that I am sorry about last night. I shouldn’t have lectured you about this guy who you are seeing and the truth is that, yes, I was jealous and I know that I had no right to be jealous and for that I am also sorry. I should have acted differently, especially knowing that you are my daughter’s best friend’ he admitted just before you cut him off.
‘Well, for what its worth, I ended it with Connor this morning because I think you were right about him’ you said with a nervous smile, causing Cillian to cock an eyebrow.
‘I can’t say that I am not happy about that’ he said jokingly before continuing on. ‘But, regardless of this, I think that we need to talk about how we move forward from what happened between us for Denise’s sake’ he then said, causing you to nod.
‘Yeah’ you then said somewhat disappointed before building up your strength in order to say something else. ‘The thing is, Cillian, I know what I want. I just think that you don’t’ you said, cheeks blushing.
‘And what is that you want Y/N?’ Cillian asked curiously as if he didn’t already know the answer to his question.
‘You’ you then admitted and, just as you did, Cillian’s hands caressed your face and he pulled you close and kissed you yet again.
The kiss was slow and passionate and, unlike the night before, you allowed yourself to give into it until, eventually, your lips drifted apart.
‘Are you sure Y/N? Because, I am much older than you and you probably have better offers with more assurances that I simply cannot offer you’ Cillian then asked as he was standing directly in front of you and held you against his body.
‘The fact that you are older actually turns me on’ you admitted before pressing your lips onto his again and then pulling away. You adored his wrinkles and greying hair and you were surprised that he had no idea how attractive he actually was.
‘But what is it that you want Cillian?’ you then asked as you felt his firm chest against you while his warm breath fanned against your neck, sending shivers down your spine.
‘Honestly, I don’t know Y/N. I have never been so fucking confused in my life’ he explained reluctantly, not knowing where to place the feelings he had built for you. You were over twenty years younger than him and his daughter’s friend and this clearly bothered him. He knew that this wasn’t something he could easily overcome.
‘Well, I am confused too but I like you, a lot’ you admitted, also unsure about what this was that you were feeling for him but, what you knew was that you wanted to give whatever this was a chance. You were curious and you were filled with desire for this man standing there right in front of you.
‘And I need to know that you feel the same and that this isn’t going to be just another mistake you are making because, if you are going to walk away after we have sex, then I am not up for it’ you then explained, wanting to ensure that he wouldn’t pull away from you this time.
‘No more mistakes Y/N. I like you and I want this’ Cillian whispered as he pressed his lips firmly right under your ear, slowly kissing down your neck.
‘I want you’ he then said as his breath tickled your skin and the firmness of his kiss made your stomach flip.
‘Then that’s good enough for me’ you huffed out in a laboured breath and just, as you did, Cillian used his hands to spin you around, causing you to face away from him.
Then, his hands dropped to your waist where his fingers gently edged themselves under the hem of your shirt, barely touching your skin. His lips moved, and he left a trail of kisses down your shoulder and towards your arm.
‘I knew this was a booty call’ you teased as you couldn't help but move against him.
‘Do you want to stop?’ he asked as your hips rocked and shifted while he gently brushed his fingers against your skin.
‘Hell no’ you giggled before you lifted your arms and he began to pull your shirt up.
You felt like you were performing some secret dance that we both knew, but that you'd never realised you'd known.
Cillian lifted your shirt inch at a time up off you, and let it fall to the floor. He sighed in satisfaction as he looked down at your breasts.
‘Why are you so fucking perfect?’ Cillian asked and you opened your mouth to answer but it came out as a sigh as his hands tightened around your waist.
‘Let’s take this off’ Cillian said determined as one of his hands inched up towards your breast, and he squeezed it gently. Then, his hands came away from you, and unsnapped your bra.
You practically shook it off of you, and then dropped your hands to your jeans. You needed his hands back on you again as soon as possible and turned to watch him as you kicked your shoes off and shoved down your jeans, your underwear coming with them.
‘Eager, are we?’ Cillian chuckled as he quickly began to undress himself as well after you had given him a look full of hunger and anticipation.
‘We are short of time’ you said as you were momentarily distracted by the sight of him unbuttoning his shirt, but you hurried to kick off the fabric wrapped around your ankles.
‘We’ve got at least two and a half hours Y/N’ Cillian then said as you finally stood there in front of him completely naked.
‘Exactly’ you chuckled as Cillian was still fighting with the buttons on his shirt, and you grabbed the fabric of it and pulled him against you, crushing your mouth against his.
Cillian made love to your mouth with his lips and his tongue. He was firm, slow, and demanding.
You breathed together, tasted together. He dragged a soft moan from your mouth with a caress of his lips. He explored you, letting his tongue run along the roof of your mouth. Your teeth crashed. He sucked your tongue into his mouth, and your stomach clenched and you let out an embarrassingly desperate sound.
Before your first night with Cillian, you'd never been kissed like this. The kisses you shared were more intimate and more sensual than anything you'd ever experienced in your life.
As you were kissing, you finally managed to unbutton his shirt and shoved it open. Your hands ran up and down his chest, exploring his toned body all the while he was relentless in his kiss. His arms wrapped around you, one hand pressing into the small of your back, and the other working his fingers into your hair.
With a small tug of your hair, he pulled your face away from him.
‘I could kiss you all day Y/N, but you said that we are short of time so you better get onto the bed’ he winked and you snaked your arms around his neck and kissed him while he walked you back into his bedroom and towards the bed.
As you were moving towards the bed, he fought with his belt and his pants all while his lips never left yours.
You shuffled awkwardly backwards until the backs of your knees hit the bed, forcing you to sit down. You kept your arms behind you to prop yourself up, smiling as you watched him finish undressing. He was just gorgeous and so goddamn perfect.
‘You are so sexy, you know that?’ you said full of desire while you watched as he pushed his pants down, kicking them off his ankles and standing in front of you completely naked, and... Sweet. Baby. Jesus…your mouth watered at the sight of his hard cock.
‘So are you’ he winked and, just as he did, you met his eyes again after having stared at his cock for a little while. That terrifying intense stare was back, and he looked like he was going to eat you alive. For all you knew, he would.
Without breaking eye contact, Cillian bent down and went to his knees at the foot of the bed, grabbed your legs, and pulled you closer to him, spreading your legs wide as he did so.
‘Lay back’ he ordered and you couldn’t help but bite your lip in anticipation.
‘What are you going to do to me?’ you asked as he was still staring at you. A slow smile graced his face.
‘I am going to make love to you with my tongue until you cum’ Cillian smirked and the idea of his face between your legs made your breath catch.
‘Oh, Sweet Jesus’ you moaned as he let go of one of your legs and put a hand on your shoulder. He pushed you back and then he lowered his lips to you.
Sweet bliss washed over you in an instant. You gasped, and moaned, and shivered. Cillian lapped at you like you were the sweetest treasure he'd ever put in his mouth. A slow, deep rumble from his chest travelled straight into your body through his lips, shaking you to your core. His tongue dove inside you, exploring you. He sucked on the lips of your sex, and the circled his tongue around your clit, sending powerful shocks of pleasure straight to your centre.
He was building you up to something big. Something beautiful.
He eased off right before you exploded, and you cried out.
‘Cillian, don't stop, please’ you moaned and, just as you began to plead with him, his fingers began to gently run through your wet slit.
‘Don’t worry, I won’t’ he said as he slowly pushed two of his fingers inside you before his tongue resumed its work on your clit.
Curling his fingers slightly upwards, he reached an unfamiliar spot deep inside you and, as soon as he reached this spot, you cried out in pleasure.
‘Oh god, fuck, Cillian’ you moaned as his fingers began to gently thrust in and out of you while he made love to you with his tongue.
With his skilled tongue and fingers working you, it didn’t take you long to reach an orgasm. Your legs began to shake almost violently as a wave of pleasure erupted through your body and your walls tightened around Cillian’s fingers.
When you finally came down from your high, Cillian stood up, pushed his hands against your hips, and slid you farther onto the bed.
‘You sound so fucking sexy when you cum like this, without having to hold back’ Cillian observed as he climbed onto the bed. He crawled towards you like a wolf stalking his prey.
‘I want you inside me, please…I am aching for your cock’ you moaned, spurring him on and, without losing any time he spread your legs wide and pressed the head against your slit, gently working the tip in and out, teasing you.
‘Oh god, please, stop teasing’ you whimpered, trying to wiggle against him. You wanted to feel all of him so badly.
‘Be patient, we will get there’ he whispered, and leaned forward so his arms were on either side of your face.
You felt him push a little deeper into you.
‘Oh god yes’ you gasped and winced and Cillian tilted his head and took your mouth with his, kissing you slowly as he rocked in and out. His lips and his tongue matched the pace of his thrusts, and you felt overwhelmed with desire as he slid deeper and deeper inside of you.
‘Fuck you feel so good Y/N’ Cillian groaned as he stretched you and pushed you until he was all the way in, and he pulled his mouth away from yours just long enough to let out a string of curses before he took your mouth again.
You couldn't breathe. Everything about him was amazing. The way he felt inside you was just perfect.
He held your head firmly in place as he kissed you, thrusting into you and grinding his hips so that he hit every single spot you didn't even know you had. Right as you were nearing your climax, he pulled all the way out and pushed himself off of you, pausing to catch his breath.
‘No…don’t stop…I was so close’ you whimpered.
‘Don’t worry, I am not done with you yet but I do enjoy teasing you’ he gasped and you could tell that he enjoyed edging you which is something no other man you have been with had ever done to you before. Unlike them, Cillian had amazing self-control which you thought might come with age.
Almost an hour later, after he edged you numerous times and made you change positions on several occasions, you ended up with Cillian on top of you once again. He slid back inside you, resuming his relentless pace. With every thrust, he ground his pelvis against your clit, and with only a few careful movements of his hips, you exploded in pleasure around him. There was no way you could have held back any longer as waves of heat and ice crashed onto you, and you fought to breathe through the intensity of your orgasm.
‘Fuck Y/N’ Cillian groaned shortly thereafter, feeling your walls contract around his shaft. He collapsed forward onto you, and you could feel him pulsing inside you and filling you with rope after rope of his warm cum.
You loved the feeling of him cuming inside you and his breath was hot against your neck, and he kissed your neck and your mouth again as he pulled back and out of you, giving you a chance to breathe.
***
‘Cillian’ you whispered, barely able to speak even after five minutes had passed since you came down from your high.
‘Yes Beautiful?’ he said, and moved slightly so he could wrap his lips around your nipple. He sucked and tongued at it, and pulled at it with his teeth.
‘Careful’ you laughed, and shifted under him slightly. ‘I’m super sensitive now’ you said.
‘I certainly hope so’ he murmured. ‘Although, I am not done with you yet. We still have an hour before dinner’ he smirked and your eyes widened immediately.
‘Oh really?’ you asked surprised and, when you looked down on him, you noticed that his cock was already hardening again just after a short five minutes of relaxation.
‘Really’ Cillian then chuckled as he rolled you onto your stomach, spreading your legs and crouching behind you.
Without losing any time, he lined himself up with your entrance and pushed back inside of you, eliciting a loud groan.
After doing you from behind for what felt like forever, he'd hauled you up into his lap and made love to you with his arms around you and our foreheads pressed together. You'd watched his eyes widen and roll back in his head as he came inside you again just after you reached your own high as well.
He then kissed you as he slowly pulled out of you, and then carried you in his arms like a bride into the bathroom where he'd showered you, washed your hair and your body, and treated you to another mind-blowing orgasm with his fingers.
‘I am fucking sore Cillian’ you huffed out as you were standing in front of the mirror and retouched your make up with a white towel wrapped around your body. You had only limited supplies with you in your handbag but were somewhat lucky that Denise had kept a few items in one of the bathrooms in the three-bedroom apartment.
‘I am sorry’ he then said as he stepped behind you and applied some more aftershave before kissing your neck.
‘Are you?’ you asked, looking back at him before pressing a gentle kiss on his lips.
‘Not really’ he then smirked before buttoning up his shirt.
You knew that you couldn’t arrive at the dinner together and, after you got ready, you decided to walk to the restaurant first so that Cillian would allow you a ten-minute head start.
But walking was difficult in itself and Cillian had a slight chuckle when he watched you waddle out of his apartment.
Your core was stinging but it was defiantly worth it.
Tag List:
@lilymurphy03@deefigs @theflamecrystal @desperate-and-broken @weepingstudentfishhorse @livinginfantaxy @rosey1981 @atomicsoulcollecto @peakyboyslover @nerdy4itall@elenavampire21 @hanster1998@mariapaiva13 @fairypitou @harry-is-your-sunflower @zozeebo @lauren-raines-x @kasaikawa @littlewierdalien @sad-huffle-nerd @theflamecrystal @peakymalfoyscullymulder @themissthang@0ghostwriter0 @stylescanbeatmyback @1-800-peakyblinders @datewithgianni @momoneymolife @ntmynouis @lilymurphy03 @mcntsee@cloudofdisney@missymurphy1985 @peakymalfoyscullymulder @otterly-fey @janelongxox @uchihacumdump @basiclassy @being-worthy @chaotic-bean-of-smolness @margoo0 @chocolatehalo @vhscillian @ysmmsy @littlewierdalien @crazymar15 @stickyknightflowerbailiff @im-constantly-fangirling @goldensunflowe-r @tellingyouastory @captivatedbycillianmurphy @namelesslosers @littlewhiterose @ttzamara @ttzamara @cilleveryone
@peaky-cillian
@severewobblerlightdragon @ysmmsy
#cillian murphy smut#cillian murphy#cillian murphy x reader#cillian murphy imagine#cillian murphy x you#cillian murphy x y/n
258 notes
·
View notes
Note
I had this idea, I dunno if it’s dumb or not, but I figured if anyone knew it would be you! Y’know, cause you seem like you know way more than me about all these mcyt guys and gals? Anyways, I saw that a lot of people headcanon that Shlatt was Tubbo’s dad, and seeing all those dad!Shlatt AUs gave me an idea:
What if after Shlatt’s dead, after things have settled, after Tubbo becomes president and spends most of his time cleaning up the messes and mistakes Shlatt left behind- he discovers he wasn’t Shlatt’s only child. He finds handwritten letters in Shlatt’s files from a distant village, all of them fairly recent, asking him for child support money, or asking him to take “his mistake” with him. But the last letter Tubbo finds is a typed one informing Shlatt that the woman who sent all the previous letters has died, and that he has 1 month to come collect his child, or they’ll become a ward of the state; it’s been roughly 2 and a half weeks since that letter arrived. How would Tubbo react to all of this, and more importantly, would he take on the responsibility of becoming his new sibling’s guardian?
I don’t know how I became the person to come to for this lol. I hope you enjoy!
The Girl with the Horns
Pairings: Brother! Tubbo x Child! F! Reader
Warnings: Mentions of emotional abuse, Implied Buillying, Swearing
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tubbo looked up the old White House building, taking a deep breath before going in. Inside, he immediately scrunched up his nose at the familiar smell of alcohol and cigarette smoke.
“Damn it, dad.” He muttered under his breath before starting to clean up the building.
He said he’d clean the building out himself as his father was the one who trashed it and now was that day. A lot of his presidency was cleaning up Schlatt’s mistakes before he even ran the rest of his new country. He sighed as he put another empty bottle in a trash bag. Schlatt had really lost it running things.
Slowly but surely, Tubbo was able to get the White House to a much cleaner state. He was now in the main office and was searching the drawers for his father's inevitable “secret” booze stashes when he found some handwritten letters tucked in the very back of the drawer. Frowning, Tubbo took them out and saw them all addressed to Schlatt.
Sitting down, Tubbo read the letter on top and his eyes went wide, back going straight as he reread the words before him.
I want money for this child you helped bring into this world!
A child?
The rest of the letter was talking about asking for child support and Tubbo was floored. Quickly, he read the next letter and it was much of the same, demanding Schlatt to take responsibility.
“Holy shit…” Tubbo muttered. “I got…I got a sibling?”
He made his way through the rest of the letters, his heart clenching when the woman writing the letters called his poor sibling a mistake or made stabs at Schlatt.
Then the last letter was a lot more formal. It was stamped with an official seal and dated. Schlatt had opened it as told by the broken seal but had obviously also put the letter back without a care after reading. Tubbo’s breath hitched as he read the letter though.
Dear Mr. Jschlatt:
We are sorry to inform you Miss Trentha has passed in an accident.
Behind, she has left a five-year-old (Y/N), of which in our records has your name on her birth papers. We will give you a month’s time to make a decision; after, we will have no choice but to send (Y/N) to become a ward of the state.
Tubbo quickly looked at the date of when the letter was sent.
“Two and a half weeks!” Tubbo exclaimed as he jumped up. “Shit! What should I do?”
He looked around the office he had spent time cleaning trying to process everything at once, words failing him. In a few short moments, he had found out he wasn’t an only child, that Schlatt hadn’t even looked back at this girl or her horrible mother, and that the sibling he just found out about was going to become a ward of the state! Schlatt had at least been kind enough to Tubbo to let Philza raise him but this child going into the adoption system…
“I-I got to run L’Manberg. There’s so much to do.” Tubbo ran a hand through his hair as he panicked.
But then Tommy’s words echoed in his head.
You can’t become the next Schlatt.
Schlatt was obviously going to let this child fend for themselves, Tubbo couldn’t be his father. He had to at least meet them. With a new will, he gathered around his friends, and with reassurances that they had L’Manberg covered, Tubbo set off on a horse to the village. It was a good three-day journey, so he’d only have roughly a week left to make his decision of what he was going to do.
Coming to the village, Tubbo took a deep breath as he stared at it. What was she going to be like? She probably didn’t have the best raising based on the letters that the mother sent. Tying up the horse outside the main hall, Tubbo went in, going through the various processes to prove that he was indeed Jschlatt’s child and proving that his father was dead.
After, they took Tubbo to a home where a bunch of children were outside playing but there was one that stood out among them and it wasn’t because she was sitting alone. It was because she had tiny horns on top of her head that were just starting to come in. Tubbo put a hand on his horns that were just starting to curl without thinking.
“That’s (Y/N).” The man that led him here nodded to the little girl.
“She’s five, right?” Tubbo asked.
“Yes. She’s not very talkative, but you can introduce yourself to her.”
Tubbo had few guesses why she didn’t want to talk. He went over, a few of the other kids were pointing at him. (Y/N) was using a stick to push images in the dirt, looking up when a shadow got in the way of the sun. Tubbo smiled when he saw her surprise when she looked up at him, he sitting next to her, wearing his casual wear rather than his suit.
“Hi. I’m Tubbo.” He introduced himself to her.
(Y/N) was silent as she stared obviously at his horns. “You have horns…”
“Yeah, I do. I’m a ram just like you.”
“Really?” She met his eyes now.
“Mhm. I, uh, I actually knew your dad because he was my dad.”
She shifted as she looked back at the ground. “Daddy was a bad man.”
Tubbo winced, putting a hand on his neck. “Why do you say that?”
“Mommy use to say that.”
“Ah. Well…dad wasn’t the greatest, I agree. It wasn’t nice for him to leave you alone.”
The little girl was silent and Tubbo tried to think of a subject change.
“Do you like drawing?”
She nodded. “Mommy wouldn’t let me use paper but I like drawing in the dirt.”
“Oh…do you…have any friends?”
She put a hand on one of her little horns and he immediately understood.
“I get it.” He smiled gently, putting a hand on his horn. “I didn’t have a lot of friends until I met my best friend Tommy. I’m sure you will find some friends.”
His heart melted as she gave him her first small smile. “I hope so.”
He sat with her just talking away, the time passing so fast without either of them knowing as they talked. He felt like he learned so much but so little about her; yet, he loved every moment sitting with her. She had to go back with the other children of the orphanage but within a few hours, Tubbo made up his mind. He couldn’t leave this little girl with everyone else; he’d take her back to L’Manberg.
So, in the morning, Tubbo put on his suit to be professional and he did the paperwork before waiting for them to bring (Y/N). (Y/N) came in timidly and Tubbo smiled gently as he crouched in front of her.
“Hey, so, I don’t want to leave without you, would you like to come with me? I can introduce you to a few of my good friends.”
“…They’re all nice like you, right?”
He chuckled, rubbing the back of his neck. “Yeah, a few of them are pretty nice.”
She looked around but nodded. “Ok.”
He grinned as he stood up. “Then I’m going to take you back to my home.”
They got the few things that she owned and Tubbo put them on the horse. After, Tubbo changed into more appropriate riding clothes before getting on with (Y/N).
“Alright, here we go.” He muttered before getting the horse to go.
Off they went to L’Manberg, Tubbo making sure they had shelter each night. It was a bit stressful for Tubbo on these few days. He had gotten used to not eating every day but he had to remember now to make sure (Y/N) ate. He also had to remember this was boring as hell for her so he tried his best to make little games as they galloped along. There was a point he went off on a bee tangent for half an hour after spotting one and pouted to himself when he saw (Y/N) had fallen asleep against him but he kept an arm wrapped around her so she didn’t fall off.
As he got back to L’Manberg, he huffed as he saw Tommy and Fundy arguing as Quackity was laughing, Ranboo standing to the side awkwardly. Yeah, that’s how he expected his cabinet to act with him gone. He tied up his horse, grabbing (Y/N)’s things before taking her hand as he walked over to them. As the pair went over, (Y/N) hide behind him shyly.
“Guys!” Tubbo called.
“Tubbo! Tell this furry bitch—” Tommy started.
“Oh, fuck off Tommy!” Fundy shouted back.
They started having another go.
“GUYS!” Tubbo shouted, making (Y/N) jump with the rest of the group. “I have someone for you to meet, so can you shut it?”
Tommy spotted the little girl peeking out from behind Tubbo, noticing the horns first.
“Holy shit, she has horns like yours.” Tommy went around Tubbo.
“Yeah, this is (Y/N), she’s my little sister.”
“A sister?!” Tommy looked at Tubbo surprised.
Tubbo nodded. “I adopted her.”
“I’m sorry?”
“It’s a long story but I’m back and I’m got to bring her to my house,” Tubbo told them before walking off, feeling the little girl squeeze his hand tighter, probably getting overwhelmed.
They got to Tubbo’s house and he looked around.
“Er…You can have my room. I’ll need to make you a room.” He smiled at her.
“Ok…thank you.”
He patted her head between her horns. “I couldn’t leave you behind sis. Let’s get you settled in and I can make us some steak. Sound good?”
She nodded.
Tubbo knew it would be stressful learning to take care of another human while he had to run a nation but he had his friends to help him. He hoped he could do all this right.
793 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fools Rush In: Chapter 3
Jungkook x Reader
Genre: Strangers-to-lovers, age gap!AU (reader is 30, Jungkook is 23), Angst, smut, fluff
Summary: You deliver the news to Jungkook and he makes his own decision.
Warnings: None to note.
WC: 2.1K
Two weeks later, you found yourself staring blankly at the large number “25″ that was on the front door of what you had recently found out was Jungkook’s apartment.
You had come to Seoul to compete in the Korea Open so you decided to try and look Jungkook up. You had Yoongi get in touch with some of the organizers of the French Open in order to get his information and luckily, he lived in an apartment right in the city.
Even though you had made the decision to keep the baby and raise them alone if you had to, you did feel as though Jungkook deserved to at least know so that he could make his own decision. That’s why you had been standing in front of his door for the better part of 10 minutes, trying to work up the courage to knock on the damn door.
Just as you raised your hand to knock, the front door flew open, almost making your heart beat out of your chest.
“Are you the delivery woman?” A tall, broad shoulder man asked and you shook your head as you lowered your hand.
“No. I’m actually looking for Jeon Jungkook,” you replied.
“Ah, he’s inside,” the man told you. “Would you like to come in?”
“Yes, thank you,” you smiled, waiting until the man had stepped aside before you walked inside and slipped off your sandals.
“I’m Jin, Jungkook’s roommate,” Jin introduced himself as he shut the front door.
“I’m Y/N L/N,” you said.
“Wait, you play tennis right?”
“Yeah, that’s me,” you nodded.
“I though you looked familiar!” Jin exclaimed, making you laugh. “What are you doing here to see Jungkookie?”
“Uh, I’m just,-”
“Hey hyung, was that the food?” Jungkook asked as he strolled out of his bedroom, walking over to the front door before freezing in his spot when he saw you. “Y/N, hi.”
“Hi,” you smiled, lifting your hand and waving a little.
“What are you doing here?” He wondered as he paced over to you.
“I’m sorry for just popping up like this but I needed to talk to you,” you stated seriously as you looked at him and although you could tell from the raising of his brow that he was confused, he turned to look at Jin.
“Can you give us a second hyung?” Jungkook requested and Jin nodded.
“It was nice meeting you Y/N,” Jin smiled and you nodded to him before he walked away and stepped into another room next to the one that Jungkook had come out of. Once the door closed behind him, Jungkook looked at you again.
“Do you want to come sit down?” He offered, gesturing to the couch.
“Sure, thanks,” you murmured as you walked over to the couch, sitting down on the edge and Jungkook sat himself down next to you.
“So, how have you been?” He wondered. “It’s been like three months since the French Open right?”
“Yeah, and I’ve been ok,” you shrugged. “Just getting ready for the Korea Open.”
“Oh, you’re competing in that?”
“Yep.”
“You’re gonna kill it,” he smiled and you couldn’t help the way that your cheeks warmed up at the praise.
“Thanks,” you chuckled. “What about you, how have you been?”
“Good, good, can’t complain,” he said. “Just been working a lot but that’s it really.”
“Still doing photography?”
“Yeah, that’s what helps pay my half of the bills,” Jungkook laughed. “I’m sure you didn’t come here just to ask me about photography though.”
“I didn’t,” you giggled awkwardly. “So, do you remember the night of the French Open, when we spent the night together?”
“Don’t I?” He smirked. “I was a little miffed that you left without saying goodbye but I figured that the whole “drunken one night stand” thing wasn’t typical for you.”
“It’s not and I’m sorry for that, by the way,” you apologized. “I kind of panicked when I woke up.”
“I get it, don’t worry about it,” he waved his hand dismissively. “But why are you asking if I remember that night?”
“Well, um, I kind of...maybe....might’ve gotten pregnant that night,” you revealed.
“Yeah right,” he laughed loudly. “Be serious Y/N.”
“That’s the terrifying thing Jungkook, I am being serious,” you insisted. “I’m pregnant.” The smile slowly slipped off of Jungkook’s face as he realized that you weren’t joking, and you watched as he abruptly stood up from the couch and began to pace the length of the living room.
“What the fuck?” He muttered. “We used a condom.”
“It had to have broken.”
“You’re a woman that plays sports, wouldn’t you be on birth control?”
“I haven’t been in a committed relationship in two years and I don’t do the whole “one night stand” thing, remember?” You explained.
“You literally disappeared on me and had me wondering if the whole night that we spent together even fucking happened and then suddenly, you show up and tell me that you’re pregnant,” he huffed, pausing his pacing in order to look at you. “I’m just supposed to accept this?”
“I know it’s a lot to take in and it’s out of nowhere,” you began. “It only takes one time though. So yes, I am pregnant and you’re the father. I thought you deserved to know.”
“So does that mean you’re going to keep it?” He questioned and you nodded your head.
“Yes, I am.”
“I don’t think I can be a father right now Y/N,” he sighed, resuming his pacing. “I just graduated from university and I’m up to my eyeballs in fucking debt that I only just started paying back and I’m only 23! I can’t be anyone’s father at 23!”
“Look, you don’t have to be involved,” you said and he stopped in his tracks. “I only came here to tell you. I can raise the baby on my own if I have to.”
“And what, I’m left to be the big bad guy who isn’t in his own kid’s life?”
“Any decision that you make going forward is your own,” you told him. “I didn’t want you to find out somewhere else because I am going to have to go public with my pregnancy eventually, and I didn’t want to keep the baby from you if you did want to be involved. I just wanted to tell you so that you could make an informed decision, that’s all.”
Just then, a door opened and Jin walked back into the living room.
“Hey Jungkook-ah, Taehyung said that he wants to go out for dinner so I canceled takeout, that ok?” Jin asked and it took Jungkook a few seconds to focus before he looked over at his hyung.
“Yeah, that’s fine,” Jungkook agreed easily.
“I should get going,” you suddenly said, getting up from the couch and reaching into your purse, pulling out a card before walking over to Jungkook and handing it to him. “This has my number and the address of where I’m staying for the next few weeks on it. Take all of the time that you need to think things through and then let me know.”
“Alright,” he replied and you gave him a small, closed mouthed smile before walking to the front door and letting yourself out.
......................................
“Y/N’s pregnant,” Jungkook confessed, two bottles of soju deep into dinner, which caused both Jin’s and Taehyung’s eyes to widen. “And I’m the father.”
“Tennis legend Y/N L/N?” Taehyung asked for confirmation and Jungkook nodded.
“That one.”
“How the hell did you hook up with her?” Jin laughed.
“Met her at the French Open, we talked for a little bit, and then went back to my hotel room,” Jungkook replied. “I woke up the next morning and she was gone so I didn’t think much of it. It was just a one night stand, you know?”
“Is that why she showed up and why you’ve had a bottle of soju in your hands since we got here?” Jin wondered and Jungkook nodded again.
“Yep.”
“Well, are you gonna be involved?” Jin asked.
“I’m not sure,” he admitted, yelping when Jin reached over and smacked the back of his head.
“What the hell do you mean, you’re not sure?” Jin scoffed. “You can’t just have a child out in the world that you don’t know.”
“Wait hyung, just because Jungkook consented to sex doesn’t mean that he consented to having a baby,” Taehyung pointed out.
“He consented to the possibility of having a baby when he didn’t protect himself and wrap his dick up,” Jin shot back.
“Actually, I did but it broke,” Jungkook muttered before taking another gulp of soju. “It’s not like I don’t want to be there though. In fact, my first instinct is to call her and tell her that I’ll be there for whatever she needs.”
“What’s stopping you then?” Taehyung questioned.
“She’s just...she’s one of the biggest athletes in the world and she’s gonna go down in history as one of the greats while I’m just a 23 kid who doesn’t even know where my life is going. She has it all together and she doesn’t really need me. Hell, she might even be better off without me.”
“It’s not about if she needs you or not though, it’s about you being there for your child,” Jin told him.
“She said that she could raise the baby alone if she had to,” Jungkook mentioned.
“Just because she can, it doesn’t mean that she should have to,” Jin stated and for some reason, that sentence stuck with Jungkook as he swallowed down the rest of the soju that was in the bottle.
......................................
A few days after you showed up to his apartment, Jungkook couldn’t get you or the baby out of his mind. He never expected to be in this situation at only 23 years old but the more that he thought about it, he realized that he wasn’t completely...afraid of it like he first thought he was.
Sure, he somewhat freaked out when you first told him and then went into catatonic shock afterwards but the more that he thought about it, the easier it became for him to warm up to the idea.
Jungkook always wanted kids and even though the two of you weren’t married and weren’t a traditional couple by any means, he knew that you could be a good mother. You were determined, hardworking, and passionate and those were all qualities that he admired in a person. He figured that if he were going to have an unexpected baby with anyone, then why not it be you?
He was also a person that believed in fate and destiny. If he managed to get you pregnant despite the two of you using protection and you still chose the keep the baby even before knowing if Jungkook was going to be involved or not, it all had to be a part of some larger plan that neither of you were privy to.
In the end, that was the thought that he decided to put trust in and that led to him finding the card that you had given him, dialing your number.
“Hello?” You answered a little breathlessly.
“Y/N, it’s Jungkook,” he said. “Did I call at a bad time?”
“Not at all, I was hitting the ball around with my coach,” you chuckled. “That’s why I’m out of breath.”
“Ah ok,” he nodded. “Well, I just wanted to call you because I’ve been thinking a lot about you and the baby, and I’ve decided that I want to be involved in their life.”
“Really?” You gasped softly.
“Yeah. I mean, I can’t just let you raise them by yourself when you didn’t create them by yourself,” he sighed.
“I don’t want you to feel forced though, Jungkook,” you explained. “I know that this is a weird situation but I don’t want you to resent me or worse, the baby. I meant it when I said that I can do this own my own if need be.”
“Just because you can do it on your own, doesn’t mean that you should,” Jungkook pointed out, echoing what Jin had told him and you just smiled softly to yourself. “You’re gonna have to be patient with me though, because I don’t have the slightest idea of how this whole parenting thing goes.”
“That makes two of us,” you giggled. “But we’ll figure it out together, ok?”
“Alright,” he agreed.
“I have my first doctor’s appointment in three days, on Thursday and you are welcome to come if you want,” you offered.
“You haven’t had a doctor’s appointment yet?”
“I couldn’t get one in the States before I had to leave to come here for the Open so I just figured that I’d wait,” you told him.
“Oh ok. Well, yeah,” he replied. “I’d love to come.”
“Cool. I’ll text you the details, ok?”
“Ok. Bye Y/N,” he said.
“Bye Jungkook,” you smiled before hanging up the phone. As Jungkook pulled his phone away from his ear, he couldn’t help but to feel oddly at ease about the whole situation. He felt deep down that everything would be ok, and he just hoped that it actually turned out that way as well.
......................................
Tag List: @mwitsmejk @hey-youre-appreciated @bettyschwallocksyee @jaiuneamesolitaiire @knowlestaehyung @missseoulite @afangirllikeme-blog @fan-ati--c @d-noona @bang-bang-bangtxn @claricedelune @daydreambrliever @dunixxd @unicornbabylover @paperpurple @addictedtohobi @bbtsficrecs @bts-junseagull @eltrain80
#bts#bangtanarmynet#bts reactions#bts jungkook#jungkook x reader#jungkook angst#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff#bts x reader#bts smut#bts angst#bts fluff#bts imagines#bts scenarios
303 notes
·
View notes
Text
Please Say That You're Joking (Pt.1) - Chuck Shurley Imagine (Supernatural)
Title: Please Say You're Joking (Pt. 1) [You can read part 2 by clicking here!]
Pairing: Chuck Shurley X Winchester!Reader
Requested: Nope
Word Count: 2,930 words
Warning(s): mentions of sex, threats of violence
Summary: (Season 4; Season 11) (Y/n) had a single one-night stand while coping with loss in a not healthy way... if only they had a clue about the weight of their actions.
Author's Note: I was recently going back through some of the "lighter" episodes of Supernatural because I wanted to watch something I could chuckle at. That's where this came from.
This might be the most crackheaded thing I've written in a while.
Also, the amount of things I had to bullshit my way through this is actually ridiculous.
Hey! I did a rewrite of the ending of Supernatural. It took a really long time to complete, so it would mean a lot to me if you check it out. Here’s a link! (it’s on my personal account)
-------------------------------------
Sam, Dean, and I walked into the motel room. We were all confused and slightly scared.
We had gone to a comic book shop to do some work on a case. However, we were then called fans.
Fans of what?
Well, fans of a series of books about our lives.
I was the middle Winchester child. Two years younger than Dean, two years older than Sam. I was beyond confused when I saw some weird, romanticized version of me on the cover of a book.
"This is so weird," I mumbled, plopping onto one of the beds in the room.
Sam jumped onto his laptop and started researching. Dean was holding one of the books, reading through it. I didn't even want to touch it.
"I don't like how he describes (Y/n)," Dean commented. "It's weird. It's like he's in love. Listen to this..."
Dean dramatically clears his throat and starts to read in an even more dramatic voice, "'Even after a hard hunt, (Y/n) could easily be seen as the most beautiful of the siblings. They mimicked the beauty of their mother more than their brothers. There's no bruise or cut that could take the loveliness away from the natural curves of (Y/n)'s face. If only they could see how everyone else would stare-"
"Okay, ew," I muttered, walking to the table. "What'd you find?"
"Well, it seems like Carver Edlund is a pen name," Sam shrugged. "And the fans are intense."
"As in," Dean asked, closing the book and joining the two of us at the table.
"Well," Sam handed me the laptop so Dean and I could look at it, "there's fanfiction. About all of us."
"What's this, 'Sam/Dean'," I asked.
"It's... me and Dean... together."
"They just don't care that we're related," Dean asked. Sam nodded.
"God, this is so weird."
"So, how do we find this guy," I asked.
--time skip--
We managed to find the publisher of the novels and found her house.
"So, you published the 'Supernatural' books," I asked as we walked in.
"Yep," she nodded. "Yeah, gosh. These books... they never really got the attention that they deserved. All anybody wants to read anymore is that romance crap."
"Could not agree with you more," I said. "We're hoping that our article can shine a light on an underappreciated series."
"Yeah, because, you know, if we got a little bit of good press, then maybe we can start publishing again," she replied excitedly.
"No, no, no," Dean immediately shut her down. "I mean, why... why would you want to do that? It's such a complete series with Dean going to hell and all."
"Oh my god, that was one of my favorite ones," she rambled. "Dean was so strong and sad and brave. And Sam... I mean... the best ones are when they cry... like in 'Heart' when Sam had to kill Madison; the first woman since Jessica he'd really loved. When Dean had to call John in 'Home' and ask him for help. Or when (Y/n) went back to the motel room after getting kidnapped and just had to sit in their own head and had to truly process not only the death of their mother but now their father. The mixed feelings were amazing."
"You're a really big fan," I noted. She nodded.
"Gosh, if only real men were that open about their emotions."
"Real men," Dean asked.
"I mean, no offense," she replied. "How often do you cry like that?"
"Well, right now I'm crying on the inside," he muttered.
"Is that supposed to be funny?"
"Lady, this whole thing is funny."
"How am I supposed to know this is legit?"
"Oh, trust me," Dean mumbled. "We're legit."
"Well, I don't want some smart-ass article making fun of my boys," she snapped as she sat in her chair.
"Oh, never," I replied quickly. "We actually are big fans."
"You read the books?"
"Cover to cover," I promised.
"What's the year and model of the car?"
"1967 Chevy Impala," Dean smiled proudly.
"What's May 2nd?"
"That's my- uh... Sam's birthday," Sam replied.
"Sam's score on the LSAT?"
"Umm... 174," Sam said nervously.
"(Y/n)'s first hunt?"
"Vampire in Washington," I answered. "Dean was at the motel sick and (Y/n) almost chopped John's head off when he scared them."
"(Y/n)'s favorite memory that's not related to hunting?"
I smiled, "Helping Sam get ready for a date when he was a teenager because Sam didn't trust what Dean had told him."
"Dean's favorite song?"
"It's a tie," Dean replied. "Between Zep's 'Ramble On' and 'Traveling Riverside Blues.'"
She finally laughed and smiled again, "Okay, okay. What do you wanna know?"
"What's Carver Edlund's real name," Sam asked.
"Oh, no. I can't," she shook her head.
"We just wanna talk to him," Sam continued. "You know, get the 'Supernatural' story in his own words."
"He's very private," she shrugged. "Like Salinger."
"Please," Sam tried again. "Like I said, we're um... big fans."
Sam unbuttoned his shirt enough to show his anti-possession tattoo. Dean pulled his shirt to the side to do the same. I rolled my eyes and yanked the arm of my jacket down and pulled up the sleeve of my t-shirt. I don't wear as many layers as them and I had opted to put the tattoo on my upper arm because I thought it looked nicer.
"Awesome," the lady mumbled before standing up. "Y'know what?"
I looked away as she pulled her pants down.
"I got one too."
"Wow, you are a fan," I slapped Dean's arm. The lady fixed her clothing before grabbing a pen and paper.
"Okay," she said. "His name's Chuck Shurley-"
And I stopped listening after that. I knew that name... why did I know that name... oh... oh no. I'm gonna kill him. We're going to meet this man and I am going to end up killing him.
I followed Sam and Dean as they started walking out of the woman's house.
"Excuse me," she called as we reached the door. We looked back at her. "I'm sorry, but you look exactly like how I picture (Y/n) when I read the books."
I chuckled, "Thanks."
"He describes (Y/n) with so much detail," she smiled. "You could play them in a movie."
"Thank you," I waved as we walked out.
"'You could play them in a movie,'" Dean teased.
"I know who Chuck is," I said, ignoring him.
"What," he asked. I nodded. "How?"
I pointed to get into the car. I got in the back seat and Sam and Dean sat upfront. Dean started driving to the address the lady gave us before I started speaking.
"Okay, when you went to hell, Sam's not the only one who ran off," I explained. "I wasn't gone for four months... just two weeks. In those two weeks, I got involved in a single one-night stand. The name he gave me was Chuck Shurley."
"You screwed the man who wrote books about us," Dean asked, sounding angry.
"Do you think I knew he was writing books based on our lives?"
"He had to have known who you are," Sam added. "This isn't an accident. He has to get visions or something."
"Yeah, I know," I nodded. "He made money off of my name and then screwed me."
"Damn," Dean mumbled. "I missed a hell of a lot."
I rolled my eyes.
--time skip--
I knocked on the door loudly. Sam grabbed my arm, shaking his head at me. The door was opened and I smiled obnoxiously as Chuck. He was in a robe, his boxers, and an old white shirt. He looked tired and like he hadn't had a goodnight's sleep in days.
"Chuck Shurley," Dean asked.
"Chuck Shurley that wrote the Supernatural books," Sam added.
"Nice to meet you," I said. "This is Sam... Dean... and I'm (Y/n)... the ones you've written books about."
Chuck sighed and went to shut the door. I stepped in, stopping it with my foot.
"Listen, I appreciate the enthusiasm, I really do and I remember you," he motioned at me, awkwardly grinning before seeming to shake the memories out of his head. I almost slapped him right then. "But please... go get a life."
"You see," Dean followed me, helping to force our way inside. Sam made sure the door shut behind us. "We have a life... and you're selling books about it."
"Okay, this isn't funny," Chuck mumbled.
"You're right," I said. "We just wanna know how you're doing it?"
"I'm just a writer, I'm not doing anything."
"Then why do you know so much about demons and tulpas and changelings?"
"Is this some kind of 'Misery' thing? Ah, it is, isn't it? It's a 'Misery' thing!"
"No, it's not," I shook my head. "Believe me, we're not fans."
"What do you want then," he asked.
"I'm Sam... and that's Dean and (Y/n)," Sam tried again.
"Those are fictional characters," Chuck yelled. "They aren't real!"
Dean grabbed him and pulled him outside.
"Wait, wait-"
"We aren't kidnapping you, calm down," I rolled my eyes. Dean opened the hidden compartment in the impala's trunk.
"Are those real guns?"
"Yes," I nodded. "And real rock salt, real fake IDs."
Chuck let out a laugh at it, "Well, I gotta hand it to you guys. You really are my number-one fans. That... That's awesome. So, I-I think I've got some poster in the house."
"Chuck, stop," I rolled my eyes, grabbing his arm as he went to walk away.
"Please don't hurt me," he begged.
"How much do you know," Sam asked. "Do you know about the angels? Or Lilith breaking the seals?"
"How do you know about that?"
"Have you not been listening," I asked. "The real question is how do you?"
"Because I wrote it," he explained.
"You kept writing?"
"The books never came out because the publisher went bankrupt," he furrowed his eyebrows.
I stepped back, letting go of his arms.
"Okay, wait a minute," Chuck crossed his arms. "This is some kind of joke, right? Did Phil put you up to this?"
"Oh my god," I muttered, pinching the bridge of my nose. I grabbed his robe. "I'm sorry but I'm really tired. Nice to meet you. I'm (Y/n) Winchester, these are my brothers, Sam and Dean Winchester. You wrote and published books about us, probably knew who I was, and then you still slept with me."
He stared at me in shock.
"What," I asked.
"The last names were never in the books," he mumbled. "I never told anyone about that. I never even wrote that down."
"Then I guess we have a lot to talk about," I let go of his robe.
The three of us followed him inside.
--time skip--
"I got a visit from Cas," Dean explained as he walked in. "I've some important information."
After talking to Chuck and getting a draft of what was supposed to happen, we were all panicking. Dean told us to wait here. Lilith was going to come for Sam and we both thought it'd be harder if there was more than one of us here at all times.
Now, Dean was coming back from seeing Chuck.
"And that important information is...," Sam trailed off.
"He's a prophet of the lord," Dean said, smirking at me.
I shut my eyes, letting my head fall forward.
"Please say you're joking," I mumbled.
"Nope," Dean replied.
Sam looked over at me. He only started chuckling after his brother broke.
Dean was laughing his head off within seconds, "You screwed a prophet!"
"Shut up," I groaned. "I'm gonna kill him!"
"Archangel will kill you."
"I'll happily pay that price," I muttered. "I slept with a prophet."
"At least that means he didn't write himself to sleep with you," Sam tried to comfort me.
"Yeah, God just decided I was supposed to sleep with the guy publishing books about my life," I replied sarcastically. "That makes me feel so much better."
"Come on, it could be worst-"
"Sam, love you, but don't finish that sentence if you even kind of value your life," I muttered.
I was desperate for this conversation to just end.
--time skip--
After all was said and done, and Chuck accidentally helped us chase Lilith away for a while, we gave Chuck a lift back to his place.
I followed him up to his door, offering to look around and make sure that he's safe. He shook his head.
"I have an archangel protecting me," he reminded me. "Can't get any safer than that."
I nodded.
"I'm sorry, by the way," he said. "About us. I didn't recognize you until after... it all... and I didn't say anything because I didn't really know how to explain it. The whole event makes me feel all scummy."
"It's alright," I replied with a chuckle. "It's fine, I promise."
He offered me a nervous smile, "Y'know, in all of my visions, you're the most vivid thing."
With a grin, I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. I stepped back and headed back toward the impala. I made sure to take note of his nervous and flustered face.
"See you around, Chuck!"
"You... You too," he called after me. I got in the backseat and got comfortable.
"So... screwing the prophet wasn't that bad," Dean asked.
I just rolled my eyes, waving through the window at Chuck as Dean pulled away from the curb. Leave it to a Winchester to end up in a situation like that.
--time skip (season 11)--
Sam and I followed Dean with our guns ready. Dean was following the amulet that he had owned for a long time without even knowing it could show us where God was.
Everyone had been infected by Amara only minutes ago but now it was okay and Dean's amulet was glowing.
"Holy shit," I mumbled, seeing who was walking over to us.
Chuck.
He was supposed to be dead. That's why Kevin's prophet powers had been activated.
"No way," Dean said.
"Hey," Chuck... or God said. "We need to talk."
Despite our understandable hesitation, Chuck reached forward, teleporting all of us back to the bunker. I stepped away from him, slightly overwhelmed.
"(Y/n)," Chuck walked over and tried to grab my arm. I instinctually slapped him. I was nothing but confusion and anger. "I deserved that. Just, please?"
I stepped away again.
From behind Chuck stepped Kevin's ghost. My breath caught in my throat. The poor boy had been through so much shit because of us.
Kevin told us about how we looked stressed and that we should listen to Chuck.
Then, Chuck waved his hand. Kevin turned into a ball of white and blue light before ascending beyond the bunker.
"Where'd he go," I asked.
"Heaven, where he deserves," Chuck promised. I nodded.
I listened to the rant about how Chuck had abandoned us all and how awful things were. Then, the conversation turned to the plan to stop Amara. The boys talked about needing Lucifer and Chuck got incredibly upset. In a fit, he went to leave. I stepped in front of him.
"No," I said bluntly. "Even if you want to avoid the subject of your estranged son, you can't just leave."
"(Y/n)-"
"Sam, Dean," I looked at them. "Give us a minute?"
They both nodded, glaring at Chuck on their way out. I tried to ignore the instincts that were telling me that Chuck was just selfish.
"(Y/n)," Chuck mumbled.
"Just answer my questions," I said. "Then we can discuss what to do with Amara without you storming away recklessly. Okay?"
He nodded.
"Have you been God the whole time," I asked.
He nodded.
"You wrote all of our stories?"
Another nod.
"Did you write that I was going to sleep with you?"
I felt manipulated and angry. I was desperate for an answer. I knew that this could've made me feel like dirt, but I needed to know.
"No," Chuck said. I clenched my jaw, ready to call him a liar. "I told you. I had been pretty much hands-off for a long time. Did I know who were? Absolutely. I'm sorry I lied to you about that. But I didn't plan anything between us. We weren't some divine plan."
I nodded, looking down.
"You know how Dean and Amara are connected," he asked. I nodded, looking back at him. "We're like them."
"And that's not a divine plan-"
"I'm not doing a good job explaining this," Chuck shook his head. "It feels like we're like them. Like there's this bond that just happened as soon as we met."
"You lied to me, for years," I said. "Saying we have some bond isn't gonna fix that."
"I know."
We both fell silent. Slowly, I started laughing. Chuck furrowed his eyebrows, "My only one-night stand... and it was God."
Chuck started laughing with me while I really processed what I had done.
I slowly stopped laughing.
I didn't notice until it was too late that Chuck had slowly gotten closer to me. As soon as his lips brushed mine, I pushed him back. Not hard, but enough to get him to step away.
"No," I mumbled. "Not that, no."
Chuck nodded, "Got it."
"Now," I sighed, "we need to actually plan to stop Amara, and if we need Luci-"
"We don't," he said bluntly. "We can do something else. We don't need him. Okay?"
I nodded. In my gut, I trusted him. Maybe that was me being an idiot but I did trust him. For now at least.
-------------------------------------
Masterlist
What I Write For
Request Guidelines
Musical Prompts
Small Moments With…
When Worlds Collide (Doctor Who Crossover Series) Masterlist
Some Original Characters
folklore/evermore Writing Challenge (and Masterlist)
#chuck shurley imagine#chuck shurley fanfiction#chuck shurley x reader#supernatural imagine#supernatural fanfiction#supernatural x reader#imagine#fanfiction#x reader
162 notes
·
View notes
Text
Old Beginning Pt. 2
pairings - aaron hotchner x reader, jethro gibbs x reader
chapters - one
summary - the news of a dinner party arrises, but there are some little challenges before the actually night
wc - 3k
an - sorry this took awhile, my summer is over and my writing schedule will be a little wonky now. i’m taking a break from answering requests, so I apologize if I haven’t answered yours, but i eventually will
Penelope and you both looked back at Aaron, taken back by his repeating of the word ‘boyfriend’. You didn’t plan on telling people so soon, considering he was your boss from your old line of work.
“I want to know everything about him, you have to invite him!” Penelope quickly went back into her loud chatting, attracting other faces at her comment. “I also may have mentioned to some of the team that you do have a boyfriend, it just slipped! You know I can’t keep secrets!”
“It’s okay, Pene,” You smiled softly. “I can’t invite him though, you know, since I’m not the one holding the dinner event.”
“You can invite your partner, everyone else can as well, considering it is a catch up,” Dave walked over, a cup of coffee in his own hand as he used the other to scratch at his stubble. “I’ll even invite the woman I’ve been seeing. Feel free to all bring a plus one, I have enough room and everyone deserves a taste of my Italian dishes, will change their lives.”
“Thank you, Rossi, but I simply can’t. It’s so soon, and he’s such a busy man,” You laughed, waving your hand. “It was a kind gesture though.”
“L/n, don’t tell us you’re embarrassed to show your new boyfriend to us?” Derek walked back over, poking your shoulder. “Penelope told all of us down here, just wanted to wait and see when you would tell us.”
“I’m not embarrassed, that’s absurd. He’s truly busy.”
“Invite him, I’ll make sure Will comes and hire a babysitter for Henry, so that we can truly have a adult night,” JJ chuckled. “Everyone is bringing a date, so it would be odd if you didn’t.”
“Actually, I don’t have a partner at the moment due to how invested I am in my studies and the factors of that many young woman my age only focus on the factor of conventional attractiveness rather then the complexity of brains and deep-”
“Don’t worry, Spencer, if you don’t have a date, then I’ll just bring two,” Emily joked. “You don’t need a date, I’m not bringing one either, but Y/n is for sure.”
“I’ll be like the tw-”
“You are dating someone, we aren’t, so you’ll bring that someone. Come on, L/n,” Emily continued on, grabbing your hand and pulling you away. “I’ll walk you out,” She turned back to wink at her coworkers, leading you to the elevator and soon the parking lot.
“Aaron,” Rossi looked towards his friend, a man who had his glare fixated on your exiting figure. “Will you bring Beth, the more the merrier.”
“Yeah, I suppose I will,” He answered, retrieving his cellphone from his pocket, pulling up her contact picture, thumb hovering over the call button. “Let’s finish up this work, so we call all get home.” He shoved it back in his pocket, commanding everyone else while moving back up the stairs to his office.
Meanwhile, you were outside of your car, looking at Emily still was right by your side.
“Bring your boyfriend,” She commented, watching as you fished for your keys and unlocked your car. “I want to meet him, I haven’t really talked to you in a long time.”
“We’re both so busy. Him as well.”
“Seriously, Y/n, I’m not gonna ease up on you. I’ve noticed the new tint in your eye, new considering the last time it was severely dulled. It’s amazing to see your real smile again, you closer to your old self despite the past losses. He really has helped you, so I want to meet the man who helped my dear friend so much.”
You contemplated her kind words, getting down to the point that everyone probably was happy to see you again, yourself physically and mentally.
“I’ll call him, see if he can come. Can’t promise anything, his work is very important to him, so if it needs him he’s there.”
Emily smiled widely, leaning over to kiss your cheek before you moved to open the front door and start your car.
“Great, I’m actually bringing someone. Poor Spencer might be the only one.”
“Aaron is as well?”
“Hotch, yeah,” She laughed. “Meet her at some track meet he had, Jack really likes her.”
“That’s good, I’ll see you soon then,” You smiled, shutting the door as Emily watched you back out, waving a small goodbye.
Leaving the facility, while at a stop light, you found your flip phone, finding the contact of Jethro and quickly dialing the number.
“Gibbs,” He answered.
“Hey, are you on a case?”
“No, are you driving?”
“Yes, safely. What are you doing? Building a boat,” You chuckled, imagining him in the basement with the tool and sweaty shirt.
“Yeah. Did you meet up with your old team today?”
“Mhm, all surprised to see me today. It was humorous in a sense. But, Rossi invited me and everyone to a dinner, telling us to bring a partner.”
“Who are you planning on bringing?”
“You.”
“So, we’re being more public with our relationship?”
“Just with the old team, my old team, they don’t have contact with anyone apart of NCIS, or at least not personal only professional.”
“I thought you were going to come and see me, instead of making me drive,” You could almost sense his smile on the other line, a mocking one.
Gibbs would obviously accept the offer, the man truly holding a strong affection for you, a soft spot personally for you, so he would agree to drive the hour or two.
But just because he would, it doesn’t mean he didn’t have to mess around a bit, act like he wouldn’t.
“I know, but then you can see my new apartment. And after this weekend, who knows when we’ll be able to see each other again. Both of our jobs involved sporadic cases that start and end at no specific time, hard to plan around. And, everyone is pressuring me to meet you.”
“I’m already popular, huh?”
“I suppose,” You huffed, rubbing your temple, exhaustion starting to take over you, wanting to get some rest, a calming bath to combat earlier feelings that seemed as if they were creeping up once again.
“I’ll come, don’t worry. Get home safe, call me when you have the address and date.”
“Okay, bye.” You hung up, tossing the phone onto the empty seat as you continued to drive, playing the music from the CD already inserted in your car.
Time leading up to the dinner seemed to fly by, especially considering that it wasn’t much time and you weren’t having to work. You decided to take the free time to get fully settled in, figure out your nerves, make a phone call to your therapist, and even read. Trying to get prepared for all the days that are to come.
Your hair was now being changed from its normal du to a new one, fancier in a sense. Applying a nice coat of makeup, new lip color, trying a new pallet and the old eyelash curler that hasn’t been used in a while, you finished ‘upgrading’ your face. A outfit was simple, considering you didn’t have many fancy ones, so with not much to choose, it was a quick decision.
Sliding that on and fixing the straps to be a bit tighter, messing with the bra to fit correctly, and pulling it down a bit, you grabbed your go to purse, shoving needed materials a into it as you moved to the kitchen.
Within the kitchen, there was a certain door within the wall of the pantry with a password. Quickly typing in the combination the door swung open, choosing between a small but handy knife, you put in the pocket of your bag.
You weren’t too worried about dangers at the dinner, but with years of catching/fighting murders, specific people after you, and even very powerful assassins, you carried certain weapons for safety.
Hearing the sturdy knock of someone’s knuckles on your front door, you rushed to shut the the secret door in the pantry, heading to your front door where someone was waiting.
A quick peak through the hole, your eyes widened in surprise and opened the door, allowing the man to walk in.
“I wasn’t expecting to see you, till uh, later tonight,” You mentioned, looking him up and down to see him more dressed up. “Are you not able to attend anymore?”
“No, I’m still going,” Hotch denied, sliding off his shoes and following you to the couch. “I just wanted to chat before than, a chance for just the two of us.”
“Is something wrong?” You walked over to your teapot, filling it with water, and placing it on your stove, heating up the water. “This is very unexpected.”
“Nothing is wrong. I just want to talk to you, see the apartment, hear what’s new with you.”
“Things,” You shrugged. “Obviously I’ve had a new job experience, similar in ways and also not. Grew closer with a new group of teammates, people, lost a few. Yeah, lost a few,” You repeated, remembering Jenny Shepard, even Kate, both amazing women, who did amazing things.
“That’s always hard, I guess my most recent loss was Haley,” Aaron hummed, soon the kettle making a high pitched noise, you rushing to take it off and grab some tea bags.
“She was also a amazing woman. Wonderful mother, cared so much for that little boy.”
“She really was.”
“Did you come to chat about her, it’s been a while since we had. Last time we really talked was five months after she passed, after the funeral.”
“It really has been that long?” Aaron questioned, taking the tea that you time handed him. “But it’s not the reason I came. I should have made more of a effort to keep in touch, after your transfer, after your loss.”
“You stayed with me for three months, allowing to lose some time with your son so you could change my dirty sheets and pick up all my snotty tissues,” You laughed, sitting down across from him with your own cup. “You had to get back to your family, make up for loss time.”
“You still helped me with my divorce during that time, and I still saw Jack,” He reminded you.
“I could’ve moved in with my father, but you allowed me not to do that.”
“Your father is a good man, but might not be the best to live with,” He laughed, a deep chuckle, something you didn’t see much. “You look nice.”
“Now you just notice,” You chuckle, taking another sip. “Thank you, you look nice as well. I was actually just going to call Jethro and tell him to meet me there, a bit of a drive and he isn’t happy about having to find a new team,” You spoke freely, feeling comfortable with the old friend, one you used to spill everything to years ago, him ranting to you too.
“Jethro? He has his own team? Sounds like a boss of some type.”
“Uh, technically. It’s complicated. I need to get going, to make it to the dinner on time and, finish, um, cleaning up my room before leaving.”
“I could take you there.”
“No thanks, I’ll see you there, bye.” You helped guide him to the door, a curt wave before he exited and shut it, locking it in a rush and moving back to the dining room table to clean the mugs.
You didn’t want to tell him all that, always insecure due to Gibbs being the prior boss of you and how people looked at that. Rumors were always spread about your and Aaron’s relationship, mostly about it being romantic.
Joining the team, you two easily hit it off due to your personalities. Always being filled with determination and stubbornness, refusing to give up till everything was done and right, even with files. Eventually you joined together, talked, spent most days with each other due to cases, and truly gained a very close friendship.
When rumors were getting around, glares were thrown your way, comments, left out by members who weren’t your immediate teams. People thought you were the cause of Haley and Aaron’s divorce, somehow word got around quickly, drama always does.
It was frustrating, already dealing with many different things at home, and even being in a relationship, it put so much unneeded stress and anxiety onto you.
So, getting into a relationship with Gibbs was a very reluctant thing on your part, he expressed his feelings first, but it was hard to accept them, despite the nerves he faced to do it.
Locking up the apartment, having all of your items with you, you made your way out the door and too your car, starting the drive to David’s house.
Upon arriving, you could hear light chatter in the home, lights on, and soothing music playing in the background. It sounded like everyone was having their fun, you couldn’t make out all the shadows of everyone indoors, just waiting outside for Jethro to arrive.
“Y/n?” You turned around at the sound of his voice, keys jingling in his hands as he walked up to you with a sly smile, shoving them in his pockets to place his arms around your waist. “What’s wrong, love?” Be snaked them around, a kiss to your somewhat clothed shoulder.
“Nothing, just a bit nervous to introduce you to everyone,” You smiled back at him, he squeezed a little tighter, catching your lips in a quick kiss. “Looking at your team, yet?”
“Nevermind that,” He grumbled, removing his hands to now interlace your left one with his right. “We should go in, right?”
“Maybe we could head back, to my place, say you are sick or something?” You looked back at him with a pleading look, to which he just chuckled at, starting to move to the front door, pressing the doorbell as you groaned a little.
“You’ll be fine,” He looked back at you as Rossi answered the door, cheerful smile on his lips, glass of scotch in hand as he moved out of the way to let you in.
“Ah! Y/n!” He cheered, leaning over to kiss your cheek and then pulled back. “Glad you made it! This must be…”
“Y/n! Oh where is the man?” Penelope rushed in, coming right by you with her own fruity drink, then leaning to whisper in your ear. “Is this him, oo!”
“Uh, Jethro that’s David,” You pointed to the man who first greeted you, him and Jethro shaking hands. “This is Penelope, the one kind of like Abby,” You smiled, as she gave you a little look, turning back and enveloping him in a little hug. She quickly turned back to you.
“He looks a little intimidating,” She whispered as you just laughed.
“For sure,” You nodded.
“Can I offer you a drink?” David turned to you two, gesturing to the one in his hand. “Something like Garcia for you Y/n, and what about you Jethro?”
“Just call me Gibbs, and yeah that’s fine,” He corrected Rossi, taking your hand as the two of you walked more inside of the magnificent house.
It truly was so well designed, very expensive, and the appetizers adorning the oak wood table looked very delicious. You wanted to go and grab a bite, before you were actually led to the living room where everyone was currently sitting.
“L/n, finally made it,” Derek laughed, beer in his hand as he pointed at you with a little chuckle. “You always know how to be a bit late.”
“Fashionably late, I believe that’s what it’s called,” JJ corrected them with her own wine glass in hand, Will sat right besides her on one of the couch as most of them in that room joined in laughter.
“What can I say?” You laughed, walking over, feeling less nervous with the factor of introducing your boyfriend, taking a seat on another couch in the large room, Jethro automatically sitting right besides you.
“So, introduce us,” Emily motioned over to Jethro, sly smile playing on her lips.
“This is Jethro, but he goes by Gibbs, and, uh, this is the team,” You started to name everyone off while pointing to them, leaving off a few names due to your members introducing their own partners to you.
Emily, Derek, and JJ had all brought partners. Spencer and Penelope decided to ‘go together’ as if they were partners, and Hotch hadn’t arrived yet. Rossi also had his girlfriend helping him cook in the kitchen, making drinks for you and Gibbs now.
“So, you work at NCIS, right?” Spencer questioned. “The Naval Criminal Investigative Service, very interesting considering the type of crimes you investigate. I would love to hear more about some of your cases and how you went about it,” Spencer smiled, a small notebook being pulled out of his pocket with a pen.
“Yeah,” Gibbs just nodded, looking at you a little questioning, which you just chuckled at.
“Why should we talk so much about work, it’s something we all do too much of,” You joked, everyone laughing, as Dave came back out, handing some drinks.
“Fine, fine, what do you do for fun Mr. Gibbs?” Derek asked, putting a arm over the couch and pulling his girl closer to his side, the woman just on her phone.
“I like to build boats, a type of hobbie I’ve been doing for years.”
“Building boats? Where?” Will wondered, intertwining his fingers with JJ.
“My basement, a private workspace.”
“How do you get it out then?” Penelope inquired, now back by Spencer and her face in her hand, leaning closer to show her interest in Gibbs statement.
“I’d be no fun if you knew that,” He shrugged, taking a drink with a small smile as Penelope gasped, Emily mouthing how ‘I like him’. It was sweet how everything was going well.
They all continued to converse with Gibbs, easily accepting him apart of the conversation, it was sweet and you were now on your second drink, practically all nerves gone.
“Sorry we’re late,” A voice mentioned in the hallway, dressed in a fine suit with a beautiful woman standing besides him. He shrugged off the last of his coat as he hung it up, taking her hand and walking into the hallway a little.
“This is such a nice place, Aaron. Oh! Your friend, wow, so grand,” The woman admired, now truly getting in your line of sight.
“Yeah,” He mumbled, eyes interlocking with yours before falling onto Gibbs. “I’m Aaron, call me Hotch.”
“I’m Gibbs,” Your boyfriend stood up, moving over to the other man with his hand stuck out. “Call me that.”
You had a feeling this evening wouldn’t be as smooth as you hoped.
——————
taglist - @wolviesbabes @hotch-meeeeeuppppp
(comment to be added, or a tag list for all my gibbs post)
#criminal minds#cm x reader#criminal minds fanfiction#criminal minds x reader#ncis#ncis reader insert#ncis x reader#gibbs x y/n#jethro gibbs x reader#leroy jethro gibbs#gibbs x you#leroy jethro gibbs x you#gibbs x reader#hotch x y/n#hotch x you#hotch x reader#aaron x y/n#aaron x you#aaron x reader#aaron hotchner
146 notes
·
View notes
Last Seen Blogs
cha3x
这个世界不再让我恐怕
there-will-be-a-reckoning
there will be a reckoning
unpopular-ship-queen
Open The Gates For Stained Concrete By Using These Simple Tips
koolaidegrande
KoolaideGrandes Sugar
idmfmusic
IDMF MUSIC