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#alright getting a bit personal here
alternatefandom · 1 year
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Right, so I (ariciabetelguese, on my main) was having a discussion with @addictofanimation on Alhaitham's actions towards Kaveh, but I don't wish to clog moonilit's notes further. So I invite you to continue our talk here, shall we?
First, allow me straighten out a misperception: I never claimed that Alhaitham doesn't care about Kaveh. I've stated that he does care, in an inept way ("he's clearly trying his best from his limited perspective, so kudos for that, I guess?"). But I still think what Alhaitham did was borderline cruel, and this is where I'm coming from.
In my youth, I was a lot like Alhaitham. Half the fandom cleanly pegged him an INTJ, and I am, too. He values rationality and knowledge, and so do I. He's practical and pragmatic; so am I. His insight can cut people to the quick, causing him to conflict with people; so had mine. Nobody liked to go up against me, and truth be told, I was perfectly content that way.
Alhaitham said he is not a leader. I agree. Here's where we differ: Alhaitham is not interested in exploring that, while I was.
So out of curiosity, I led people, despite hating every second of it. Here is what I found: 'tough love' as you called it only works if you can make sure the person was picked up afterwards. Pain is a great teacher, but only if you're treated after. Otherwise, there's a big possibility that the other person will actually be set back in their journey of healing, and if you get yourself cut off, there's really not much you can do to fix that.
And until the Palace of Alcazarzaray was built, Alhaitham was never there to pick up Kaveh, nor was he there to make sure that someone else did. I'm not even sure if he tried to apologize; was there a lore bit I missed somewhere? After all, to this day, he still takes digs at Kaveh's very ideals, the things he prided himself on, although people still disagree on whether or not Kaveh takes these digs seriously. Regardless, I don't think much of Alhaitham's methods, and seeing as Kaveh remained a stubborn idealist who literally gave up everything for Dori's palace, we can see that his methods didn't work out all that well, either, so... yeah.
When you are your own worst enemy, it takes a friend/family being real with you to snap you out of it. The best way to tackle illogic actions/thoughts is with logic and reality. Alhaitham didn't let Kaveh believe a lie (that it was somehow his fault) and used logic against it.
And yet.
Alhaitham had seen through the reality that he had never been able to face, causing him to feel reality's bite for the first time, a feeling that made Kaveh steadfastly declare that he regretted making friends with this all-too-intelligent person.
Kaveh already knows. He didn't even waste a second denying Alhaitham's words because deep down, he already knew. He was simply not ready to face it; he didn't know how to do so. To reiterate: as a whole, it's not a logical trauma, so it's not so easily solved with facts and logic. If it was, a brilliant engineer like Kaveh would've solved it easily.
What Alhaitham did was like telling a depressed person that they have no reason to be sad because they have too much to be grateful for in life. Detangling an illogical trauma is not that simple. Does that mean Kaveh was too sensitive? I guess, in the same vein of people who's just been wounded are too sensitive, geeze, why did you shout when I poured alcohol over your wound? After all, alcohol is good at cleaning wounds, no? What I did was a good thing!
Once again. I'm not saying that Alhaitham doesn't care about Kaveh, or that he wasn't trying to help. I'm saying he's incredibly inept at caring, and he ended up hurting more than helping during their fight. But then again, he was still young and inexperienced at the time, so I won't blame him too much for it. In the end, I agree that his friendship with Kaveh could be somewhat beneficial; both of them could learn from the other's example. After all, they're each other's reflection :)
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averlym · 8 months
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ghostwriter (their grandma would tell them she'd lose half her soul)
#or smth smth. having a lot of Thoughts. anyways here's the piece i've been working on and sometimes u have to just say Done#there's a lot of thinks but i am maybe a bit tired and so tmr i'll come in and add all the Tags that i'd personally want to get from myself#maybe i'll reblog the extras tmr too. this is an incredibly self indulgent piece + it probably deserves a tag ramble essay or smth#ig for now we see how it stands for itself + in the meantime:#adamandi#beatrix valeria campbell#hello!! i'm back with belated tags yippee!! alright so for funsies i'm going to make it sound like i'm going bonkers over this :3#the eye shine... the glowy eye... it's like phaethon shine but also smth about eyes to windows to the soul and like#there's two beatrixes here! half the soul. lost part doing things specific to the phaethon and here it's portrayed as tearing off her name#because that's really; truly; when it all starts!! also notable for the ghostly beatrix is i did it more painterly and cloaked in shadow and#fading into the bg. i think i was super duper specificish about where the glow comes from! front lighting back lighting beloved!!! like help#let's put it this way- beatrix face always glowy. important parts of paper also glowy. it's just that different elements are turned away#from the viewer by each beatrix!! also also. let's talk about the very gently implied blood and red etcetera#like the red string is canonical and i love personally the whole red strings of fate thing even though it's not Here Applicable exactly but#that definitely was an influence! and also the blood in the bg... i'm starting to think this is a recurring trend. but anyway shadowy bea#the other strings hang while the red string loops!! so like that one string feels almost alive. it's a sort of whimsical i put on the same#as metaphorical glowy eye!! also also the eye is lowkey influenced by the whole idea of Eyes and Spotlights within the show and also glow#as in power as in heyyy you ever think about writing as a visual medium huh#speaking of writing!! there is no beatrix thingy complete in my head without text sorrry but the black text overlays are always so >>> to me#and in the sense of art styles and overlays shoutout to all the black crosshatching outline thingys because For Some Reason in my mind#of all the characters beatrix feels like the bnw ink printed illustrations you get in books idk#fun fact! i spent so long rendering this and that was fine i liked it! but then trying to figure out text to go on the papers was a Thing#i tried to do. but then gave up on! sometimes i have to pick my battles and graphic design is indubitably Not my passion bc Fonts#fun facts about this is i Actually did start with a quick sketch in mind and there's been so many changed elements. in the og the front#paper for instance had 'ardess murders' written on it and the back one said phaethon interviews.. i like the nominee list better it feels#more narrative-esque and less passive than her just holding her writing.! other elements that got discontinued were that#front beatrix was supposed to blur into the other ghostly beatrix but i couldn't do it without sacrificing clarity so... no... no blurry#oh and the red string morphing at the ends to smth more abstract was always there from the start!! og had more floating papers#and also a silhouette of vincent and a scalpel bc 'one who pulls the strings' but that (pun intended)! got cut (hahahahahahaha) (sorry)#used also to be a lot of print room clutter but that got cut to bc compositionally i made beatrix larger (learned lesson from last art)
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iamfuckingsorry · 15 days
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So I know the fandom loves seeing young Kim as a punk, with leather jackets and combat boots and a million pins and patches and in general fairly anti-establishment and also somewhat openly gay at least within the community
And I'm not gonna lie I love it too
But there's also this idea that I can't get out of my mind, and it's Kim in what is called "epa-kultur" over here. 15 year old kids too young to have a driver's license or a car, but one of the friends in the group has six older siblings and managed to get one of those cars that are only supposed to go up to 40 kmph that you can drive with a moped license, but that can definitely go up to like 150 if you flip the right switches. It's 30 years old and absolutely shit but you all love it anyway. You drive around, a shitty speaker in the back playing terrible electronic music too loud to really hold a proper conversation while inside, nine kids packed like sardines sitting on each other's laps (one of the backseats is taken up by a speaker), ending up in an unused parking lot to get drunk on 3% beer. The car's broken half of the time but that just means you play bad music and get drunk on cheap beer while trying to fix it with random parts you got from a friend of a friend of a friend, always fucking up in some way no matter how hard you try so the car will inevitably break down again within a week. Until you eventually really do get fairly good at fixing it, and then you just end up checking all the bolts and connections all the time instead. And like it's definitely a small town/rural thing over here. It definitely would not be a thing in Revachol, and especially not in the part of Revachol Kim grew up in, where you're happy to have a roof over your head and food to eat and you're probably reasonably rich compared to your neighbours if your family has a car. And while it's very different nowadays especially with younger kids you could still get a lot of the ideas common in more conservative areas, about gender roles and queer people and whatnot.
And I just love the idea of 15-year-old Kim with a group of other kids like this, feeling a tiny little bit like he finally belongs somewhere for the first time, trying to figure out a way to get some money for a car part for his friend's car, drinking even though he doesn't really want to because that's what you're supposed to, casually making sexist jokes that make him strangely uncomfortable even though he doesn't really understand why, fully convinced the only reason he tries to find any excuse to spend time with this one guy that is so impressive and knows so much about cars is because it's the first time he's found a good friend, because why else would you feel this way about a guy
and then after a couple of years maybe he does bring up possibly feeling a certain way about men when he's a bit drunk and he immediately gets made fun of, and when he doesn't react fast enough and say that obviously he was kidding, eww that would be so gross, he gets called a hundred different slurs without hesitation, not just homophobic ones but racial ones too, and he realizes once again that there really isn't a single place in this world where someone like him could truly belong, no matter how it might feel in the moment.
(and then maybe he does get a leather jacket and some patches a few years after that lol)
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rist-ix · 8 days
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https://www.tumblr.com/rist-ix/749015401700229120 not you reblogging this when you ship bloom with the man who murdered her family 😭
Bloom's into ppl who slay! Hope this helps :3
#alright snark and ship wars aside i get where you’re coming from tho#if you're genuinely interested in my thought process here i would love to elaborate#which is exactly what I’ll do!#first of all! the post you linked is about headcanons#which my brain kinda wants to put into a whole different category than ships — fandom ships in particular! — but i can leave that aside#because there IS an argument to be made that relationships are an extension of characterization and personality traits#if you wanna go that route i would wanna explain that Bloom's and/or Valtor's interest in the other is in fact based on canon#(even though I don’t really think ships need to be established in the source material. make shit up that’s what fandom is for#1) the Andros episode speaks for itself. Valtor specifically tells the Trix to back off because HE wants to be the one to fight bloom#2) the episode before that he asks questions about her (and only her; even though he has more powerful enemies to worry about)#demonstrating curiosity about and interest in her#3) that same episode (or the one before; can’t remember) is their infamous first meeting#where time LITERALLY slows down as the pass each other on the stairs#they get IMPACT FRAMES#the whole color palette changes!!!#idk about u but I eat that shit up. love the drama of it all no one does it like them#I’m gonna skip all the instances where Valtor is spying on Bloom through his little scrying spell because oh god who has the time#let’s go straight to Bloom#if I had a week I would not be able to collect all the moments where she growls his name in pure fury and single-minded determination#she gets a little bit obsessed with him over the course of the season and I personally think that’s very sexy of her#Bloom is known for her tunnel vision when it comes to her past and origins and Valtor's existence fits PERFECTLY into that#it ties in neatly with her overarching story of the past 2 seasons#literally PERFECT foils#which always makes for the juiciest stories#4) she singles him out for a duel in the museum episode#5) she can literally feel his presence#6) the mere mention of his name sends her into her weird faux enchantix#of course there’s no romance in canon but there’s TENSION AND CHEMISTRY which is all u really need for a ship#all their animosity and bad blood is what makes it so INTERESTING to wonder how they COULD work. it’s the spice that makes for good fanfic!
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bugmistake · 8 days
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ive gotta. get it together a little bit i think. holy shit i really did not mean for the tags to get THAT long
#i have a colin provolone in ny head rn. i just need you to lock it in a liittle bit.#it’s just the worst possible time.#i do actually have to do the hard scary stuff.#and i am fully capable of doing them and i am a competent adult even if i’m realizing need a little more support than i’d like to admit#and actually i feel much much better after those things are done#and ACTUALLY i’ve also made a lot of progress!! i think 14 year old me would be like. shocked to see the person i am now#but either way. gotta lock it in a liiiittle bit.#tomorrow will be. a lot of texting and emailing back.#a lot of ‘hi sorry it’s taken me so long to get back to you!’s tomorrow#AND ONE PHONE CALL. im way better at those now! pretty cool!#also getting my car inspected this week. miiiiight need to bring a friend for that one#sometimes i get scared at the mechanic because there’s always a 90% chance that one of the mechanics will be the most drop dead gorgeous ga#**gay person#person ive ever seen in my life and then i have to be like uhhhhh. ahahaha. heres my shit ass car with the elvira and snoopy#bumper stickers on it. thanks so much!#OKAY. alright. hello. hyping myself up for the rest of the week#ive been a little bit off kilter bc i didnt have a whole lot of structure last week or this one since my classes ended#but im feelin a little more optimistic#i am a competent adult who is good at his job and has many good qualities and frankly he is getting hotter and more confident also as well.#<- affirmations btw.
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I Do Think. And I think this is where AraSawa and MineDai could diverge in a way.
Because with a question like that, I think Mine is genuinely oblivious, and perhaps at the time not fully aware or willing to admit to himself certain Truths.
I can't quite tell Exactly Why the question caught him off guard that badly, but I don't think it really occurred to him that it kind of sounded like Daigo was interested in him, because he was hung up on being asked about his personal life at all.
I especially don't think it did because, well, Daigo takes him to the middle of the hotel district and tells him he wants some action, right. Most people would catch on to the implication but Mine's just like "oh like at the batting center :)?" And even Daigo seems dumbfounded here, like that's not at all the answer he was expecting.
I don't even care if it's the brainworms, I genuinely think he was planning to send Mine up to a hotel room for one reason or another (either propositioning him directly or proposing idk a threesome/foursome) and it didn't work out because Mine is too dense to pick up on that kind of thing.
And with Jo, like how Mine was all Mine.exe Stopped Responding, I think we'd also get to see a variation of Sawashiro.exe Stopped Responding. But it wouldn't be for the same reasons. Because it's like, maybe Mine doesn't know, but Jo knows and doesn't know what to do with it. Mine's え? is to express genuine confusion, but Jo's え? is to buy time to put up a dozen psyche locks.
daigo talking with mine it's like. he's not used to a man being seemingly so genuinely interested in him, never mind that man being his superior (who insists mine doesnt treat him like his superior tonight and even insists he call him something more personal) who wants to be his equal and so he doesn't catch on to the Evident advances because isn't that a bit forward? isn't that a bit much? mine hasn't done anything to warrant that kind of attention yet has he.......
and then arakawa talking to jo it's just
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chewysgummies · 9 months
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Heya moot! How are you doing :)
It’s been a long time since we interacted!
Hi, hello. Sorry that we haven't been talking to each other for a while. I got rid of Twitter cause of boredom, lack of interaction from my post, and how it was affecting my mindset.
I just randomly decided to just delete it and ended up ghosting everyone since at one point, I wanted to be by myself without anyone to talk to online. I have been getting messages from my other moots but I didn't respond to them cause again, I wanted to be by myself and not interact as much.
I'm doing okay by the way. Just been doing my usual routine and just been watching YouTube and such irl. Recently Im starting to open myself up to Brawl Star and playing it often so there's that.
So far, I'm just trying to find a job for me to work at by visiting this one place that offers you assistance in finding employment, but at the same time, my parents are also suggesting that I find something to study since I'm out of school now and I have nothing to do anymore. (I graduated two months ago btw.)
Anyway, sorry that I straight up disappeared on you guys like that and not responding to the text messages from my other moots. I just wanted to be by myself and felt a bit comfortable not interacting as much at the moment. But I'm starting to be a bit more active here and idk if I wanna go back to Twitter anymore cause Elon musk ruined it and the app overall is just really shitty and made me feel bad about myself whenever I'm on it. I did provide explanations on Twitter before I deactivated it for myself but idk if you guys saw it since I deleted my account too early.
I do miss you guys there. I know you guys aren't as active here as Twitter, but I sometimes wonder how you guys are doing right now while I'm over here on Tumblr, rumbling about Killbot 86 as usual.
But overall, I'm doing okay. (Thank you for asking! I'm fine, I needed some alone time for myself since out of nowhere I started to feel a bit timid and sorta sad. I don't know if I'll go back to talking to anyone here again since I'm pretty much okay on my own now. But I miss you guys, I hope y'all are doing okay there on Twitter or anyplace.)
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medicinemane · 9 months
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Actually there is one thing I may legit start doing once I have my social anxiety a bit better tamped down on is when someone's telling me how their kid's just kind of a bum who doesn't have a job and hangs out in their room all day (why the fuck are you telling a stranger, once it was a nurse telling me this stuff and it's like... that's real messed up you're badmouthing your kid to a patient)
I think I'm gonna try and hit them with a "sounds to me like they may be depressed" (cause... it does)
Gonna take some work to feel like dealing with this stuff, but... I think I need to start basically trying to sound sympathetic to the parent, while also reframing it as "it sure sounds like they're struggling and could really use some support right now"
Cause once again... that is literally what it sounds like to me
You fools, you've got no idea you're talking to a fucking worthless loser. I will always go to bat for the isolated fuck up who can't get a job, cause that's just me. Don't bad mouth your kid to someone that's got more in common with you kid than with you, I know what it feels like to be in that situation, I'll always go to bat for them and think you're being a cry baby and need to grow up and actually parent
#shout out to the dental assistant who was like 'oh... you're 25? you've got plenty of time; I know you'll figure this out'#as opposed to they hygienist who was like 'oh you can't afford this toothbrush? maybe you should move back in with your mom'#like... what the fuck lady? you say that shit to a literal patient? ...you think that's good business#meanwhile the first lady... just can't express how much people like that mean to the world#I will always work to be a 'you're doing alright kid' kind of person rather than a critical jackass#and maybe some day I can work to lean on parents to make them feel a bit guilty about shitting on their kid instead of supporting them#cause they 100% should feel guilty#'but I feed them and I put a roof over their head'; yeah... that's called being a parent; that's bare minimum#I fucking do the same for my mom; and it sucks still playing parent; but even I manage to avoid guilting her#and I never had a kid; yet I'm pulling that off#you did... you can get on my level#and it's so sad you're not on my level when I'm fucking pathetic#you letting a loser be better than you? you've got less manners than some scum?#that's pretty fucking weak; that's my mom's parents tier stuff#and they were always feuding with a literal child and being made to look like fools when their plan always fucking failed#like... good job; you tricked a kid into eating banana despite not like it... and then they didn't like it and you looked dumb#that's who you people look like when you complain about your kids#I'm not saying raising a kid is easy; do I look like I want to do it?#but I'm saying once they're here... they kind of get priority now#and you never ever get to call them a burden#cause you had them; it's 100% your fault they're here; you have a duty now and you don't get to complain about them#now it can be a hard task; and you can be like... man... it's fucking killing me doing what needs to be done... it's a lot to deal with#but you don't get to treat them like a burden#...eh... I've got feelings on this#and the feelings are mostly just being pissed off about it
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guideaus · 1 year
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i need to see the baby boy again!!
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arthur-r · 10 months
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asked reddit how to maintain stage presence while seated and the responses are ridiculous so does anyone here have advice?
#‘​‘get a wheelchair for sympathy’’ yeah i would have a wheelchair if it were that easy to afford!!!!#i did like the advice of making the chair super cool. the person suggested i go to a thrift store and get the best chair there#i’ll have to see about clearing that with the drummer (concert is also her grad party) but sounds like a good idea#however it doesn’t actually help me look less awkward while singing and that’s the problem#is that by default i sit with my whole body crossed and folded and that’s not how to look like a lead singer#and all the rules i know to fix that involve standing up. and i nearly passed out just singing my songs from a chair yesterday#because that was somehow also too much exertion. yeah i’m not doing very well. i wish the concert could wait#but anyway has anyone here had to perform from a chair and your hands weren’t automatically busy?? what did you do with them????#i’ll be playing cello in some songs so i’ll be alright for those but other than that i have no clue what to do#anyway our second concert ever is in a few days i’m pretty nervous#this saturday. real people are coming and a real musician is opening#and i’m not even allowed to wear my cool shoes :(#i also keep dreaming that it’s the last day of school and i’m walking down the hallway crying???? and seeing people i miss??#so just feeling a little bit strange. anyway my grandparents will be picking me up in a little bit to go out for my birthday (was in april)#so i’m gonna have a shower and get ready for that. but here is a little status update i guess#me. my post. mine.#delete later#and right please give advice!!!! my stage presence is already awful cause i’m autistic and can’t read the room. being seated makes it worse#anyway i’m getting in the shower. but thanks preemptively for any and all advice and otherwise i just hope you’re well
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thebuttsmcgee · 2 years
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sometimes I will see opinions, and I just have to live with that. It gets to me sometimes tho
#this is specifically about owl house tho#saw someone not too long ago call Luz's character bland and compared her to Anne Boonchuy#and today I saw someone say that mcu is the same as toh since there arent any risks taken and the dialogue isnt great#so first off Id like to say nuh uh. wrong. quit that#secondly toh literally got an ENTIRE Season prematurely cut to a significant amount of time BECAUSE the risks taken for the show#meanwhile the mcu's biggest risk is having a gay person on screen for a solid 5 seconds only to cut them in other countries#literally right now there are posts on here talking about the vfx workers who were incredibly mistreated by marvel and disney#yet marvel will still get whatever it wants.#gunna be completely honest that actually pissed me off LMAO. the show itself since the beginning has always been a risk#a show that has an actual older woman as a main character who is meant to represent people with illnesses and is also bisexual is way more#than anything mcu has done. they couldnt even stick with one of their main blonde boys being fat without making it seem pathetic#not to mention toh is all about not conforming to not only society but those in power meanwhile mcu is literally government funded#alright. got. got a bit too heated LMAO#it just really like feels a slap to the face that they compared 2 disney products that are completely treated differently for different#reasons. I know a good proportion of mcu views are stuff for casual viewers who dont care for comics and just wanna see a movie#but still!!! fuck all that lmao#anyways this post is also for other shit tho. I see sonic takes that should probably be punishable by cringe#not that Im blaming anyone ofc not hggghgcoughcoughfandubcoughbekb.#but yea. god. what a fucking day.
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munamania · 2 years
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sorry bitterness consumes the soul etc etc <33 i will say though. depending on what is going through her head this could all be really fucking cruel lmfao
#like. alright. idk if she Knows i have feelings for her but given the whole blocked stories thing and whatever like. who knows#what bf said. and whether she is or was at any point genuinely confused or something because she does like him but we. hit it off. and it#was all just a Lot. like that doesn’t give the excuse for the times when it felt like she was sorta.. leading me on. yk. though maybe i was#truly delusional and stupid last semester i don’t know. maybe she just also enjoys talking to me on a friendly level and that’s fine and all#but it’d be really weird if she like. also refuses to acknowledge me outside of class? or anything like that..#or like. basically was just using me to stroke her ego in that sense if she does Know. like that would be shitty#would i like to be friends sure do i think this would absolutely crush my soul probably.#and i’d like to say ohh i don’t think she’s doing xy or z but i truly don’t know her. you know. beyond the little bits#of time we’ve had to talk about our lives and whatever#and anyway. it is stupid that i’ve spent so long trying to guess at what’s on her mind cause i’ll never know unless you know.#we’re ever close enough that we can talk about it or. whatever.#so. i definitely think when i see her again i’m going to take any chance i can to say something about last semester. um yk. in a way that#makes sense i’m not just insane. though i do hope that i can subtly make boyfriend seem really paranoid and weird. sorry. lol. but he was!#honestly if i were hitting on her or trying to make a move i’d understand him being like that but i was polite and friendly#so he has no business getting involved in my personal feelings! yeah i#don’t like him yeah i have feelings for his gf but you get what i mean i’m not. Trying to be an asshole here.#do i wish they’d break up? if she’s not happy. but am i going to like literally be a homewrecker? obviously not again who knows#if i even have the sway to. SORRY i’m being soooo insane one thing about me i can talk about a topic#a million times. anyway.#i just hope it’s not insane emotional manipulation or anything on anyones part i don’t know.#we have a really easy banter so i think it’ll be easy enough to talk to her and then hopefully. have a little bit more clarity as to where#we stand. yk.#abby talks#might delete this later if i decide i’m being a little tooooo 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫#i guess what i’m trying to say is. because this isn’t all the clear and obviously it’d be fine if we’re just friends. but the way we#interact is a little. idk. like we tease each other a lot and it’s like girl idk u tho… i’m having fun but huh?
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ii-zi · 2 years
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sister tested positive last Friday & my father+me are symptomatic lol had a kitten fall ill for several days and literally just yesterday got better made 2 notebooks out of scraps + started painting mini painting in those tongue pushing wooden stick thingies as PT bc my hands are getting worse ever day but I've been lucky overall bc of a slight decrease of other like. Symptoms. Oh also my mother is Literally gaslighting me like she's outright stated multiple times already that I'm making up having been sick for months bc it's impossible and I'm crazy like. ????????????
#quick update lol it's not like i /have/ to be active here but it feels weird being offline and not even saying a word..#for some reason???? I've been doing so much gift wrapping?? i have no money to get gifts lol but like. other ppls gifts#ik not everyone has hand issues like i do but i like making the gifts easy to unwrap for ppl w motor skills issues jfjdjf my favorite is#the string to rip it open without struggling. something i struggle picking up the string tho but i don't have#ribbons :/ so gotta make do w what i do have jdkejg#been thinking abt putting like a little piece of wood or something easier to grab 🤔 like those accesible zippers i really like the design#been Obsessed w mini personal projects lately??? like for a week straight working on random mini projects til 5-6am lol#and out of the blue yesterday (or two days ago??? idk i just found out that it's already friday n almost had a panic attack LMAO) i#started like. looking back at personal long term projects that are still v much in the brainstorming phase and#actually got to do a bit of work for one???? i love typing lol i hadn't in quite a while bc using computers hurts my hands a lot but#i really missed it JSJSJS#my house is a pigsty im sleeping like so many hours a day and only have enough time for a single meal so only have#energy to sit and do nothing 😭 but the cats are alright 🙏#I'll have to do a fuckton of cleaning in the next two weeks tho bc im going back to classes fml#and my sister never arranged my therapy session that her therapist asked her to bc she's procrastinating on it 🥳 I'll die ill and insane#OH I've had coffee three times this last week and didn't destroy my stomach!!!!!!!!
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been feeling pretty shitty lately
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screampied · 6 months
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FANTASIZE. — GOJO SATORU. ☆
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synopsis: it's the middle of the night and your mascara's streaming down your face. man, breakups are the worst-so what do you do? go to your fwb for "comfort." he gives you comfort, alright. ★
wc: 4.7k+
warnings: fwb trope , pwp, quickie , size kink, dacryphilia, degradation, unprotected sex, mating press, breeding, overstimulation, oral [m], face-fucking, praise kink, dumbification kink, pet names, hair pulling, not yet proofread
an: my first request!! Heavily based off Ariana's "fantasize" bcos that song iz still stuck in my head :/
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3:29 A.M
you: wake up. please.
typing . . .
gojo: girl.. it's like three am.
you: you know why i'm texting u this late, satoru.
typing . . .
gojo: oh yeahh, true. well? come over then ;)
seen
you were on gojo's doorstep in nothing but some two year old university hoodie and a simple skirt, despite it being around the middle of the night, you couldn’t sleep, and you needed any sorts of distraction from your previous breakup. mascara raced down both sides of your cheeks, practically sticking to your skin, you were a devastating mess—sniffling, you wipe your eyes once the door creeks open, and there he is.
“i gotta say, babe. your taste in men is pretty shitty,” he scratches his head with a simple shrug. he chuckles, spotting you shoot him a glare from his peripherals as he held his front door open for you to step inside. “…then again, you always come crawling back to me after getting dumped so-”
“i didn’t come here to talk.” you sighed, slipping off your shoes before staring directly up at him.
“oh, i know.” he smiles with reassurance in his voice, almost as if he was mocking you. “this the part where i take my pants off right? baby, even if you’re all heartbroken, you’re still so so predictable..”
“…damn, no f-foreplay?” he nervously smiles, averting his eyes towards you—gojo wore nothing but simple sweats, grey at that, his hair was slightly messy but it made him ten times more attractive. a simple tank top covered his abdomen, and you could just about make out his ripped pecs just poking through the thin cloth piece of fabric.
you didn’t wanna waste any time, he could tell by the way you just easily shoved him with ease, against his own bed. you started to feel yourself throb, just having your fingers tangled against the thin white strings of his sweatpants. “shut up.” you mumbled, starting to pull his pants down.
“ya sure you wanna go down on me, babe? that gag reflex of yours—”
“satoru.” you glared, and he just smiles, so eager to use every second to get under your skin. but god, was he annoying. he knew he was too, the both of you knew it, gojo satoru was just purely infuriating.
sometimes you wonder why you’ve been fucking him on the low. of course not during your relationships, but he was the only person there for you in the aftermath, the only one there to comfort you, so to speak. even if that particular way was to be inside you—alas, if it was anything gojo was good at, it was fucking you. making you forget about your shitty exes. it was just something he knew how to do. he knew how to do it right too. gojo was a perfectionist after all.
“gonna suck me off with cute tears streamin’ down y’er face, yeah?” he praises, bringing a hand towards your hair, giving the crown of your head a light stroke, it’s soothing. though it causes you to let off a soft whine, feeling yourself start to throb just a bit more just from his strong, loud cologne scent that scattered across the entire room. “look at me while you do, then. wanna see that pretty face while it gets ruined.”
“your dirty talk is improving.” you sulked, and it makes gojo the one glaring at you now—it's cute.
gojo doesn't reply.
instead, he wraps a hand slightly around the back of your neck, bringing your face close towards his bright white briefs. rubbing your face against his bulge and he grunts. “shame how you make me hard even with that annoying bratty mouth of yours.”
after that little snarky remark, gojo couldn’t wait anymore. he was getting impatient, and your teasing wasn’t helping. he stares at you, watching you with close intent on the way you pull down his boxers just halfway, leaning in close enough to give his shaft a nice long lick, from his base to his very reddened coloured tip.
“s-shit.” he grunts, and you keep your eyes remained on him the entire time, his grey sweats were just visibly pulled down to his ankles as he sat up near the very edge of his un-made up bed.
gojo lets off a soft sigh, and it's more of a grunt with the way his voice pitches—his legs spread just a bit, a hand rubs against his leg. your tongue softly swipes against the head of his cock and he nibbles on his lip a little to quiet himself.
he gets a bit of shivers, feeling the very tip of your tongue playfully caress the few veins that poked out on his dick. gojo was surprisingly well trimmed, just a few tiny specks of white hair covering near the lower part of his base, but he was heavy and oh was he hefty as well. gojo satoru was the epitome of a 'packer.'
“open that mouth. tired of waitin’,” he grumbles, and he’s growing so frustrated, you can tell from his facial expressions and the way he kept shifting on the cushions. your blink at him, slowly opening your mouth before he intakes a sharp breath. “stick out y’er tongue, babe.”
you do, lolling it out and gojo grunts, wrapping his fingers around his dick before slowly slapping his thickness against your tongue. “think you deserve it?”
a pout makes its way against your lips, you were eager, whines were getting pulled from you at his consistent teasing and him slapping his pretty glossed tip against your tongue. all you could do was nod, you were on your knees while he was sat upright near the very edge of the bed.
“nuh uh,” he clicks his tongue, bringing a hand towards the back of your head to give hair a light pull, moving your head just slightly in a moving rotation. “need 'ta hear you say ya want me, gorgeous.”
what an egotistical jerk.
you wondered why you put up with someone as such as gojo satoru, but then you remembered. he always knew how to fuck good.
“i- i want you, satoru. i want it..” you mewled, the mess between your legs only making you dampen more and more. your thighs squeezed shut against each other as it was hidden beneath your pretty plaid skirt, and once you voice those sweet words. gojo lets off a cheerful yet cocky hum, using a hand to open your mouth just a bit before pushing himself inside.
it’s been a while since you sucked him off, usually it’d be him to eat you out. for hours, not to mention.
“shit,” he curses, feeling you immediately waste no time, wrapping your lips around his cock. your lashes fluttered before glancing up at him. gojo stares right back down at you—his abs flex beneath his shirt and it's sexy, his posture is even attractive. gojo’s slouching a bit with one leg stretched towards his side, it doesn’t take that much long before his eyes start to seductively go back, along with his uneven pink lips opening just a bit to breathe and pant. “missed y’er slutty throat, babe. always know how ‘ta suck it good.”
you wrap a hand swiftly around his base, and your head starts to bobble up and down, he was huge and his girth only doubled that.
your tongue meets against a few of his veins and he grunts, grabbing a fistful of your hair.
“must have been hungry, yeah?” he pants, faking a pout on his lips as he pushes you down just a bit further on his length. you nod, using as much of your own spit as you can to make the experience more pleasurable for him—who were you kidding though? you just wanted to forget.
about everything, your heartbreak, the past arguments, literally everything.
“shit, with a face that pretty,” he huffs out, growing more hornier from your tongue sliding and grazing against his tip. “gotta fuck it, babe.”
you start to gag just a bit once gojo tilts his hips forward a bit and he starts to thrust in your mouth. your nails dig into his thighs, wanting for him to continue and he swipes a thumb across your cheek that was full of your ruined mascara from crying many hours ago. “good girl. you should be cryin’ like this, not wastin’ those pretty tears because of some scumbag.”
you whined, reaching down to play with yourself just a bit, still sucking him off and trying your best not to use your teeth. “eyes on me, babe,” he reminds you, tapping the side of your temple and you’re just about weak in the knees.
you started second-guessing yourself, there had to be some reasonable reason why gojo fucked better than any of your exes, boyfriends, anyone.
even if it killed you to say it, you had to admit, he knew just how to please a woman—especially if that woman was you. you knew you had to be careful though, gojo wasn’t the type of guy to settle down in a relationship, he made that known the moment you two started your little 'fling.' if you could even call it that, friends with benefits.
were you starting to … fall for him? damn, that would be bad to say the least. outside the bedroom, gojo would always tease you, he was more so playful and of course, flirty.
“think 'm getting close,” he pants, and his breathing patterns change, and your head just goes up and down—he’s got a good strong grip on some strands of your hair as he watches you with dilated pupils, the way your tongue works around his tips sends him shivers, his leg starts to bounce as he’s chasing his incoming anticipation.
the build up, it makes his mouth go dry that he’s almost speechless, which is so ironic because of how he’s literally always talking your ear off.
“fuck, doing so good f'r me,” he says, and his voice starts to get a bit whiney from how sensitive he’s growing. that feeds your ego just a little, just knowing that you’re making him like this. all just from your tongue, and maybe a little bit of stimulation.
gojo moans, feeling your tongue flick against the frenulum part of his dick and he pauses for a moment, the way his eyes roll back just a bit was so sexy—that was one way to make you throb even more, and it certainly did.
your tongue runs up and up, almost as if it was a race and he’s so close to loosing focus. he’s not thrusting his hips into your mouth anymore, instead he plops flat on his back against the bed. you giggle, standing up while your mouth was still attached to his soon-to-be flaccid dick.
“c-cumming,” he grunts, watching your own drool pour down your chin. you were so messy, you couldn’t help it. it was one of the many things gojo loved about you, actually. once he came, he shakes a bit. shuddering, and letting off a cute moan, he catches his breath as you look at him with half-open eyes. “swallow ‘n show me, baby.”
within seconds later, you swallow his load and it tastes sweet, yet bitter. your eyes squeezed shut for a moment before you stuck your tongue out again, and he brushes a thumb against your chin to remove your spit.
“cock hungry whore,” he whines, still catching his breath before leaning down towards you only to squeeze your cheeks together. “now gimme a kiss.”
you whined, sitting up to kiss gojo and he wraps a hand around your waist, tasting himself on your lips, his tongue drags against yours and you whimper before making your way onto his lap. he chuckles at your enthusiasm, sliding a hand up and down your waist slowly to make you moan even more for him.
after a few moments, gojo pulls away to breathe until both hands of his attach to your waist. his gaze was just enticing, you could tell he wanted you just as much as you wanted him.
“barely touched ya and you're nothin' but a sticky mess,” he grunts, and gojo snickers once he feels you start to grind and grind your hips against him sensually, you’re so needy and desperate for more of his touch. “walkin’ around with no panties, don’t tell me you’re just a dumb slut who just wants a crumb of dick.”
“satoru—please.” you begged, aching and itching for him to be inside already. he trails his lengthy fingers against your ass, no panties behind displayed and all you had covering you, just barely, was a plaid skirt. he grins, giving your ass a two-second squeeze before spanking it to hear you whine out. “fuck me satoru.”
“fine.” he says, stroking your chin to reach down between your legs. you moan and that single motion makes your back arch whilst your hands were thrown over his shoulders. “go slow baby, don’t want you to hurt y’erself.”
“shut t-the fuck up.” you whined, barely able to keep up your facade. gojo’s dick hovered against your achy folds. just a few inches and he’d be inside, just imagining him fucking you ruthlessly made your mouth start to water, you were hungry for it.
'desperate' was the perfect word to describe you.
“how ‘bout ya make me, hmm.” he teases, and he was so cheeky. you hated it, but then again, the way he fucks you always made up for it.
no reply.
instead of using words, you decided to let your pussy do the talking. aligning yourself against him, gojo sits upright with such a cocky grin. “go slow, babe. wouldn’t want ya to hurt yourself. been a while since i've—shit…” he pauses before nervously smiling. “…been inside this tight pussy.”
it was warm, you chewed on your bottom lip as you sank down on him, immediately leaning into him to give him… a hug?
gojo was just as surprised as you, it seemed you were acting a bit different. of course you’d be, you’d just gotten out a relationship. so you’d tend to be a bit more clingy than usual. not that he ever minded, he preferred you like this, so cute and sentimental, all in your feelings. but despite that, it was just sex and nothing more.
or was it?
“fuck,” you moaned, practically straddling him now. gojo’s hair is messy, it’s all in his face, white stands splattered all across his forehead to where it was just effortlessly attractive. he didn’t even have to do much to make you pulse between your legs. “quit looking at me.”
“but you’re so pretty when you try to take control,” he shrugs, flashing a cheesy grin and you’re just embarrassed. he was certainly enjoying this, getting underneath your skin. and you let him.
every.
single.
time.
your lips tremor as you whimper, he’s nearly all the way inside and he stretched out your cunt, you’re dizzy out of nowhere and your eyes get a bit droopy—but fuck, gojo’s amused, using one hand to rub down your back as you start to rock your hips against him, biting down hard on your bottom lip as the tip of his cock mashed and kisses against your sensitive areas.
“uh oh,” he huffs out in a short mini pant, swiping a tongue against his lips before grunting. you were sopping wet, he spanks your ass to quicken your pace and you moaned. “this what you call ridin' someone? thought i taught ya better than that, babe,” and then he sniggers at seeing your face drop once he holds your hips firmly still and in place. “if you can’t do it right, maybe we should just end this thing-”
“n-no, okay okay okay,” you stuttered, so desperate for him to fuck you, but you had to fuck him first. gojo hums to himself, and you start to ride him. a tiny mewl exits past your lips once you move against him before you’re bouncing on his lap. your head’s spinning, mind s racing miles a minute and it’s just euphoric.
gojo’s got such the cockiest grin on his lips as you maneuver yourself against him, chewing on your lip every few seconds to suppress your sweet sounds, he eyes you up and down before his voice gets a bit rapsy, turning you on ultimately.
“speed it up, baby,” he grunts, spanking your ass once more and you whimper from feeling his touch press against your skin. “touch yourself while you ride me. give me a little show. show me what i’ve been missin' since you’ve been away from me for so long.”
“o-okay.” you breathed, bringing a shaky hand towards your body, panting as you rode him. his dick reached deep—damn. his girth, it was just appetizing, you needed gojo satoru carnally, more than anything.
you and him both knew that.
gojo smiles, watching you start to fondle with your perky nipples that visibly poked beneath your tank top, rocking your hips against him back and forth to where a low grunt leaves from his mouth every few seconds.
it was strenuous on how repetitive your movements were against him. who were you kidding though, you missed this. you missed him. perhaps though, in reality you just missed his dick.
yeah…. it was probably that.
“touch yourself as in..play with your pussy, dummy.” he teases, watching you whimper once he spanks you again, you’re feeling yourself become close each time he reaches deeper.
now your mouth starts to become dry, your head’s still spinning and you’re just about at a loss of words.
“…g-gonna cum soon, 'toru,” you alerted him, slithering your fingers down towards your throbbing clit. the stimulation made your eyes nearly close shut as his thick length drags across your cunt so righteously thorough, making sure to not miss a spot to reach you deep where you can feel his pure existence.
“aw,” he hums, gripping your hips to make you bounce harder on him. you whimper from gojo taking such initiative, holding onto him as he’s drilling himself into you basically since your legs were starting to become numb, you could barely ride him but you continued to bounce against him again and again, leaning into his neck to softly nibble and suck against his skin. “mhm. i missed you too.”
you could hear such arrogance drip from his voice, causing you to become more wet for him in the process. again, a perfect word to describe the entire situation would be:
embarrassing.
before long, you came and that was one of the best orgasms you’ve had in a long time. no matter how much you denied it, no one could you please you, fuck you, hell—pleasure you as much and good as gojo did. you throbbed immensely with your legs joining from how it was just shaking and shivering, your body practically going limp.
this brings such a smile to gojo’s face, still shamefully playing with yourself.
a hand dug deep between your pried open legs, your chest heaves as you stare at gojo and he pecks a kiss on your lips, muttering something along the lines of, “my good fuckin’ sloppy girl.”
but once he had you on your back, it was an entirely different story. gojo had completely dominance and control now—vigorous mean smacks and hits against your pussy, making sure to grow quiet purposely to hear how sinful your cunt was to him.
to say the least, he was addicted. your pussy was too good for him to not constantly fuck you.
gojo wasn’t too interested in relationships, but who was he to turn down a good fuck?
exactly.
you had so many orgasms pulled out of you, you practically lost count.
you were currently now just laid flat on your back, just about being folded. your pussy sang constant harmonies by how many times gojo made it squelch and cry out for him, for some reason he always loved putting you in mating press. partially because of the eye contact.
but also, he just loves to gently press against your tummy while staring deep into your eyes, speaking to you in such a phony-mocking tone, asking you if you feel him.
it’s a rhetorical question, you weren’t supposed to answer it because of course you feel gojo. his dick was pummeling in and out of your sweet cunt to where your vision started to turn a bit hazy. this position gave him an excuse to fuck you deeper, striking his hips against you repeatedly with your cute legs just sticking up in the air. perfectly hanging over his shoulders.
“you’re such a slutty girl, babe. always lettin' me break this pussy,” he pants, his voice turns more raspy to match his ruthless thrusts and you whimper, dragging your nails against his thick calves. his balls thwacked and thwacked against you, you felt so warm and you’re just a noisy mess.
you don't even realize you’re drooling while maintaining initiate eye contact with gojo. “..cute,” he raises his brows, bringing a thumb up to your lips to wipe it. “only i can make ya drool for cock, hm?”
you eagerly nodded, tears poking in your eyes. the dried up mascara sticking to your lashes still remained. “y-yes, satoru please. ‘s really good. want more.”
“course ya do,” he cursed, deepening his hits against you and you feel him reach more once he dips and pivots his hips. you moan, your mouth opening—a dramatic gasp type moan leaves your lips and he leans in to kiss you. you’re taken by surprise, but you sink into his warm embrace, running your needy tongue against his while he’s still occupying his cock between your tight stingy walls that was never gonna let him go.
the kiss was one word, sloppy.
partially because of you. you couldn’t think straight while you were getting mercilessly pounded in his bed. gojo tasted sweet, minty and a bit honeyed flavored, his tongue softly clashed against yours and you feel his lips form into a smile once he playfully sucks on your tongue.
his breathing along with yours was warm, it was really intimate, for a second you forgot about your depressing heartbreak—and it was all because of what’s between gojo’s legs, who knew.
butterflies started to form in your stomach, and it made you cringe, you really hoped you weren’t falling for him but he made it so hard. gojo’s been fucking you for hours and hours non-stop, his name approximately lived inside your head rent-free.
it’s all you were ever moaning out anyway, or just blabbering how you were about to cum again and again and again, he’s got you in a chokehold.
“f-fuck,” he groans, feeling himself swell. reaching his very peak. he felt a sensation brew up in his thighs as he continued to drill himself into your tight pussy that kept hugging onto him tightly. he loved how clingy you were. and you couldn’t exactly help it too, it was as if your body had a mind of it’s own. gojo’s strokes were so delicious, your eyes slowly roll back now just like his were, piercing the edges of your nails into his skin as you’re being fucked limp quite again. “gonna make me dump another load, babe. overflow your sloppy heartbroken pussy with s’much of me.”
his voice was a bit shaky now, it was honestly cute. droplets of sweat beads raced down gojo’s forehead as he’s panting, his breathing patterns were staggeringly fast-paced and rapid as he stares at you and—oh shit, he’s feral. you could see from how his pretty cerulean eyes never leave yours. it’s as if his pupils dilate just slightly each moment he gets more close.
he’s hungry, gojo licks his lips at just envisioning himself pumping you fell again, watching his own sticky cum pour out of your hole just to plug it back in again.
“fill me p-please, 'toru.” you begged, and his body weight was crushing you, not literally, but he was pressed against you—you were for sure limp now, your arms were just sprawled against your sides as your head just bounces back against the cushioned mattress within each deep thrust he presents to you. “stuff me full, satoru. breed m-me.”
“would be kinda funny if i made you a mama,” he whispers, his tone was playfully yet sweet, he was purely mocking you though. he’s maintaining deep eye contact as his thrusts transmits you to such a high, you whimper for him to continue because you were coming close too. “make this perfect tummy all swollen and r-round,” he sighs, rotating his hips against you—it was sloppy, an entire mess. some of his cum from him recently spilling into you dripped down your thighs and you moaned from how messy it was. “bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you.”
“m-maybe.” you muttered out, clinging onto his wrist and he chuckles.
“maybe?” he repeats after you, leaning in to kiss the side of your mouth—gojo’s buried entirely balls deep and you’re just panting and panting, both chasing your incoming releases.
you shiver a bit, feeling him rub a hand across your tummy, mimicking his previous action of pressing down on it. “tsk, poor dumb baby. can’t even think straight. bet all you’re thinkin’ about ‘s getting filled, huh?”
you sniffled, throwing your arms around gojo and he chuckles, licking a stripe up your neck only to sink his teeth against your collarbone lightly to hear you moan.
“s’ okay, babe. cum with me,” he says in a hushed tone, his voice was so deep and seductive, just hearing gojo’s voice against your ear was just enough to make you soaked already, as pathetic as it was. “be my messy girl, don’t be shy. love when you slut yourself out for me, it’s cute.”
“s-satoru,” you squeaked, your nails were piercing into his soft skin as your right thigh started to bounce against him as you chased your incoming high. “fuck, ‘s deep, satoru. fill me please.”
gojo kisses the top of your forehead as his hips strike and rummage inside your walls, you clamp down on his so good he grunts, it’s so raspy and pitched it makes you throb. “shit, better not waste it then. come on baby, relax,” and he’s talking you through your orgasm—acknowledging your changing breathing patterns that he knew whenever you were close, he brings a thumb towards your cheek to stroke your chin before smiling. “give it to me.”
you whimpered once another orgasm got stolen from you, you’re just being pounded into the mattress with random blabbering leaving your lips, you’re so dumb, so cockdrunk, again it’s really pathetic.
gojo groans, feeling you tighten against him before it’s his turn. his hips slow but still maneuver and pivot against you, and once he came, it was a thick load, he’s the one about to drool now. he averts his eyes towards your pussy, watching his own cum spill out of you, it’s hypnotizing to him. gojo runs a thumb against your slit and you whimper once he pauses his thrusts but slowly pulls out. a pop sound was created and you whined, wanting him to keep stuffing you full.
you craved it.
gojo leans in, kissing you for a final time and it wasn’t as sloppy like last time—more passionate and sincere, which scared you a little. you hoped you weren’t catching feelings. gojo probably hoped you were though.
“satoru.” you panted, once he pulled away. “i-i think i love you.”
he’s panting and catching his breath as well as you, he sits up with his toned biceps pressed against the sides of you before speaking in a low alluring voice. “babe?”
“babe?”
you blinked twice, and realized you were being shook lightly by the shoulders. the realization hit you like a truck once you realized geto was calling your name—he had a worried, almost pale expression on his face once he sees you come back to reality.
“suguru..?” you mumbled, in the same exact bed and still feeling dizzy from your many orgasms that got pulled from you the entire night.
“did you.. just call me, satoru?”
oh.
maybe you were just fantasizing the entire thing.
7K notes · View notes
lvlyghost · 6 months
Text
Remnants
PAIRINGS: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x F!Reader
SUMMARY: You got hurt and Simon finds out.
WORD COUNT: 1.0k
TW: bruises, slight angst. reader missing simon. also fluff think that's it. lmk if i missed any. also poorly edited and not proofread. mind the english!🤭✨🤍
A/N: this is so self indulgent. embarrassing how much time it took to get out because i've had this idea for two weeks now. anyway enjoy!💛
Masterlist✨
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Laying in bed until it was late was part of your daily routine when Simon was off on deployment. Too tired to even get up when he wasn't around to wake you at 7:00 a.m.
He was a morning person unlike you.
You remember the days he would drag you against him by the waist mumbling something about being too late to be in bed, to which you had groggily bit back and slapped his arm in a playful manner. Then he would be gone for months, leaving nothing but an empty bed and the absence of his deep voice to fill your ears. Feeling that made your eyes well with tears and your heart ache. What if I don't see him again? What if that was the last time I ever felt his touch?
Shaking your head you pull yourself out of the comfort of your shared bed, taking a quick bath before preparing yourself a nice breakfast.
Winter is starting to settle in and your favorite thing to wear is his black hoodie. The one that swallows you entirely. It smells like him, it's almost like being embraced by him.
"Come on don't cry now." rubbing your eyes with the hem of the sleeves. Traitorous, salty droplets spilling down. "Jesus." Taking a deep breath you calm yourself and the ache gradually stops.
The kitchen is somewhat cold despite the heater turned on. You watch as the coffee brews —the one he dislikes— you smile again although small. Barely a quirk of your lips at the thought of him looking intently at you as you take a sip and offer him one.
'Bloody incorrigible.' He had muttered.
But you had seen him smiling that day as well, as different as you both were from one another, the love you two held couldn't be denied, nor broken.
That's why when the front door creaks open your eyes widen, legs moving faster than your brain can register. Socked feet dragging across the wooden floor nearly slipping. Simon stands stall, the door closing behind him as he lowers the black duffel bag on the floor.
"Are you really back?" Your lower lip trembles, the emotion too heavy to hold it back.
"Come here, love." You lunge forward, collapsing against his body. Simon's quick to catch you with strong arms holding you. Bodies pressed together. He can finally let himself breathe. The smell of your home, the smell of that awful coffee you love, the aroma of your shampoo and perfume that drives him absolutely crazy. He pulls his mask off and his mouth is soon against your soft lips. Oh how he missed you. He missed this, his girl softly caressing his face standing on your tiptoes. Simon grumbled, when he feels the air shift and you pull back, his brown eyes glimmer with devotion.
"Don't worry there's tea for you. Plenty. I made sure of that for when you returned." He inhales deeply, kissing you once again on the forehead. Taking his hand you lead him to the kitchen to serve both the breakfast you've been working on. "How are the boys?" You ask taking two mugs out of the top cabinet.
"A bit more scarred than before but they're good." He comes behind you lingering close —too close— to your back. "Price wants a reunion. Told him I'd let you decide."
"You already know I'll say yes." He hums watching you pour some water in the kettle and waiting for it to boil. "Black or chamomile?"
"Black." You try to move around as much as you can with him caging you from behind. Giggling when he once again kisses you on the temple. "Alright, let me see you again..."
Simon grabs you by the forearm it's not hard, it's gentle but firm. Firm enough to hurt your neglected limb. You shriek, a loud 'no' leaves your lips as you stumble back and away from him, soothing the place where he had touched you. It hurt so much but you quickly regret your reaction knowing it'd spark something within him.
Simon's eyes go wide, then his brows furrow so hard you can see the small line that could leave a permanent mark on his forehead.
"What was that?" He growled. The distance you put between you and him is cut off by his long strides.
"It's nothing, I- I swear." You trail off, searching for an explanation. But he's smart and he won't let this pass.
Few things could make him lose his temper, you lying about your wellbeing was one of the top on the list.
"Show me." He demands and the way his eyes pierce through every part of you leaves no room for discussion.
Rolling up your sleeves you hold out your forearms. Simon's jaw clenches so hard you're certain he's cracked some of his teeth. Eyes set on your damaged limb; red and purple bruises on your skin. They're so fucking big and he has to remember how to breathe and control his emotions. "How?" His eyes shot back to yours, awaiting.
"I promise it's not what you're thinking Simon."
"Don't give me that. I asked you a question." he takes one of them careful not to press too hard as he brushes his thumb over one of them. Fucking hell. It's swollen.
"Just work Simon. I had to carry big boxes and you know I'm not that strong, that's it. So stop thinking the worst, yeah?"
Sighing he lets go of your arm, the anger slowly ebbs and he feels fucking tired. He thought the worst. No one could blame him, it was in his DNA.
"Next time let me know beforehand, bloody hell love."
You give him a quick hug.
"I still might have to have a talk with your cunt boss."
You snort.
"No you won't." You declare, motioning for him to follow back. "Tea's ready."
Oh, but he would definitely pay him a visit.
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