This art is based on a sneak peek from For Want of a Nail, an as yet unposted fic by the commissioner, @notoftheskaal.
Yang was vaguely aware of the door creaking open, but couldn’t bring herself to care with the warm weight of Blake on top of her, hands in her hair, lips on hers, tongue—
“Excuse me?! On my bed?! I know Yang’s precarious bunk would probably collapse under both of you, but what’s wrong with defiling your own bed, Blake? Off! Now!”
They broke the kiss at the sound of Weiss’s outraged screech. Yang looked to where Weiss stood pointing at them, face flushed almost tomato red and eyes narrowed. She looked rather ridiculous, and even more so seen upside down through Yang’s eyes, still flat on her back under Blake. Ruby stood behind Weiss, her eyes covered with a hand.
Yang blinked as Weiss’s words sunk in. About them being on her bed. But they weren’t? “Your—? But—” Yang looked around and her words stumbled to a halt. Books didn’t support the bunk overhead. Ropes did.
Oh. This wasn’t Blake’s bed. Come to think of it, they’d both been a bit distracted when Blake backed her towards the bunks, liplocked.
Weiss swatted them with her schoolwork binder. “Get off!”
They scrambled up.
“Sorry.” Yang rubbed at the back of her neck. It felt as hot as her own face. “Uh, if it helps, we didn’t defile it.”
“That’s a matter of opinion!” Weiss’s words hissed between clenched teeth.
“Clothes stayed on! We just kissed, nothing more.” Yang didn’t dare look at Blake. She was afraid she’d burst out laughing if she met Blake’s eyes, and that might be fatal even when Weiss didn’t have Myrtenaster to hand.
“With. Tongue!” Weiss jabbed Yang with an accusatory finger with each word. “That was no innocent kiss!”
“Not listening,” Ruby muttered, covering her ears. “Not listening. Nope. Not hearing anything mentally scarring.”
“Think of the children! Ruby had to see that too!”
“Uh, I’m not a child, and I clapped a hand over my eyes before I saw that.”
“Shut up, you said you weren’t listening!” Weiss elbowed Ruby.
“Ow, Yang’s right, you sharpen those!”
“Do not tell me your sister’s right about anything when she’s been an indecent trespasser!”
“It was an honest mistake, and we’re very sorry, it won’t happen again,” Blake said, voice smooth as her skin.
Weiss levelled her accusing finger at Blake. “You were smirking when you saw me, Blake Belladonna!”
“I was smiling. Anyone would smile after a kiss like that.”
“Smiling? That was no innocent smile. You looked like—” Weiss cut herself off, eyes flicking upwards, to the level of Blake’s uncovered cat ears. Weiss abruptly looked rather uncomfortable, as if she’d been about to say something she thought inappropriate to use for a cat faunus.
‘Like the cat that got the cream, huh? Or something like it.’ Yang risked a glance at Blake. There was no smirk on her face now, just her usual inscrutable mask. At least until she met Yang’s eyes and smiled at her.
Yang’s blush deepened and her heart skipped a beat. ‘You’ve got it bad, Xiao Long. Doomed, that’s what you are.’
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RWBY X Bayonetta x TFS Hellsing: Meeting the Grandparents
Summer: Oh it’s going to be great! I haven’t seen my Papa since I was a little girl.
Taiyang: Summer, he abandoned you! In the woods!
Summer: Nonsense, he just went out for a very, very, very, long walk! And I was picked up by a group of nuns till I went to Beacon so it wasn’t like I was in any danger.
Qrow: What about those night terrors about fighting off wolves and Grimm?
Summer: Oh I’m sure Papa just mistook those nasty things for puppies. Anyone can make a mistake.
Alucard: Oh my little Sunshine, look how big you got!
Summer: Papa!
Alucard: I heard your a huntress now, good for you.
Summer: That’s right, I’m the leader of my own team.
Alucard: Neat.
Summer: This is my Husband Taiyang, and my BFF Qrow! You can meet the your granddaughters when they wake up.
Alucard: I have grandchildren? Show me! Show me!
Taiyang: First things first.
*Taiyang punches the vampire king so hard in the stomach, he’s sent flying into half a dozen trees.*
Taiyang: That’s for abandoning your daughter! Ya prick!
*Alucard returns by a clutter of bats. Slowly dusting himself off.*
Alucard: Well, I haven’t had a punch hit me that hard since Van Hellsing. I like you blonde, Put er here sonny boy!
Summer: Yay
Both Qrow and Taiyang looked baffled.
Qrow: ”so who’s your mama?”
Bayonetta: ”Well helloooooo handsomes....”
Summer: ”Mommy!”
Bayonetta: You there. Bird boy. You look familiar...is your dad's name Dante?
Qrow: ”Oh no....”
Bayonetta: Ah so it is....tell me how are he and Vergie?
Qrow: I think you mean my sister
Bayonetta: Ah yes. Right. Wrong set of twins. Anywho, where are my grandbabies?!
Ruby: Aren't you a little young to be our granny?
Bayonetta: I like this one!
Later that evening
Yang: So lemme get this straight... hair is also your clothes...?
Bayonetta: -nods and sips tea- Correct.
Yang: Teach me!
Alucard: Darling didn't we agree NOT to teach the children dark arts?
Bayonetta: That flew out the window when you taught Ruby and Summer how to laser blast grimm with their eyes
Alucard: I hardly think that counts dear, It's literally light. How can that be considered a "dark art"? Besides, I don't even know where they got that from. It's not even one of my powers.
Bayonetta: Hmph! it probably came about when you slept with that church full of nuns while I was 'asleep' for a century!
Alucard: oh come now darling the bloodline needed preserving and you know damn well those goodie-goodie cloaks didn't hold a candle to you.
Bayonetta: Hmph flattery will get you nowhere!
Alucard: Except for between your legs
Bayonetta: Darling! Not in front of the children!
Alucard: Y'know in my defense? My fetish for nuns whips chains and torture all began with you love.
Tai: -Whispers to Summer- So is this why you are so uh...
Summer: Freaky borderline demonic in bed due to years of celibacy? Yes. Yes it is.
Bayonetta: I Do hope at least your first time was blissful dear.
Summer: -blushes remembering said first time- It was uh... intense...to use a word.
Tai: -pulls his collar and sweats- Really glad that Qrow took Yang on a trip to Vale that day
Bayonetta: Ohhh la la~
Summer: Moooom! No! He's mine!
*as Salem is coming to Atlas*
Yang: Ruby I think it is time we had are team meet are grandparents.
Ruby: I believe you are right Yang.
*Ruby pulls out her scroll and makes a call and puts it on speaker*
*on the other end a phone is going off singing *I'm a bitch I'm a woman*
Alucard: Oh it's Ruby I have to take this dear. *answers call* Ello.
Ruby and Yang: Hey grandpa.
Alucard: Hi girls what do I own the pressure of this call.
Bayonetta: Hi girls.
Ruby: We need some help and you two came to mind.
Alucard: are they hookers.
Yang: No.
Alucard: and like that you lost me.
Bayonetta: Darling!
Alucard: I'm joking what is it you need help with.
Ruby: someone is going to destroy Atlas and we need your help stopping her.
Alucard: can I eat her.
Yang: she is immortal so I don't know if you can.
Alucard: I eat your grandmother every night.
Weiss: gross.
Bayonetta: is this on speaker.
Ruby: It is.
Alucard: Oh why didn't you tell us sooner we would really leave a mark on your friends.
Yang: Maybe another time can you come help.
Bayonetta: we just have to get dressed and we will be there.
Ruby: ok see you in a minute.
*Ruby hangs up*
Blake: what do you mean a minute we are in the air and you didn't tell them where we are and
*Alucard appears through the wall between Yang and Ruby*
Alucard: HEY KIDS WANT TO SEE A DEAD BODY.
Blake and Weiss: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH.
*Bayonetta appears on the ship.*
Bayonetta: darling do have to do that every time we meet new people.
Alucard: yep.
Ruby and Yang: Hey guys.
Bayonetta: Oh look how big you two have grow- Yang what happened to your arm.
Yang: It got cut off by a crazy guy.
Alucard: Can I kill him.
Yang: Already killed him.
Alucard: That's my girl.
Bayonetta: and who are these two.
Ruby: there are team mates.
Bayonetta: nice to meet you so for my husband's actions.
Weiss: it's fine now we know where they get it from.
Alucard: So who are we fighting.
Ruby: her.
*Ruby points out of the ship at Salem on a whale.*
Alucard: I guess we are going to have a whale of a good time.
Blake: yep there related.
Alucard: Wait does she have a boob window.
Bayonetta: Wait she does.
Alucard: Ready to have some fun dear.
Bayonetta: you know it darling.
*both leave*
Weiss: did.... did she have guns for heels.
Yang: Yep.
Blake: I thought my family was weird.
https://www.facebook.com/RWBYfanart/photos/a.503857119978352/1067705766926815/ if you want the original source.
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