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#Laughing at the fact that I’m going to be writing my dad a thoughtful little Father’s Day card
skinreflectsthesun · 1 year
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#Laughing at the fact that I’m going to be writing my dad a thoughtful little Father’s Day card#that is just filled with straight up lies.#what id rather say is this#thank you for making me aware of just how fucked up you are#thank you for spending the majority of my life convincing me my mom was the problem#thank you for never showing me what an actual loving and caring marriage looks like#thank you for making me feel like I have to always apologize but then telling me to stop apologizing#thank you for never coming to any of my soccer games but then pushing for the fact that you always had to work.#you actually didn’t you just didn’t care.#thank you for being a dick to my brother and making him feel like he had to go to extremes to be a man#thank you for calling me fat after I just had a baby.#thank you for causing conflict in my life during a sensitive time in my life where I’m trying to step into a role of motherhood#while also being a wife and daughter and trying to find myself again#thank you for always getting your feelings hurt but never wondering how you hurt mine.#thank you for never holding yourself accountable for your behavior and your actions#thank you for constantly guilting me by implying that you’ll die some day and I’ll feel bad#thank you for saying that I wouldn’t have any of the nice things in my life if it weren’t for my husband#my husband told me that’s just not true that I’m a good person who deserves good things regardless of if I’m with him or not.#thank you for cursing me by saying one day I’ll see how it feels to be you and how my son will treat me just like I treat you#he won’t.#because I’ll do better by him than you ever did for me.#anyways#happy Father’s Day#plz disregard this#I’m feeling things and need a space to put them
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vulpisnocturna · 9 months
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My tired brain 🧠 possibly misunderstood, but hc requests are still open? If not disregard this ask, but if so what are your hc on Uchiha Males discovering their spouse or s/o, having an intrauterine device for birth control? I would say not done out of spite but just something their s/o has had for years (some IUDs last for 10 yrs or longer!). Maybe it was a slip of the tongue, since it’s not something most women spend all day thinking about. At least I don’t.
Maybe a slight misunderstanding over the whole scenario. It can be NSFW as well. 😈
HC requests are in fact still open, as they don’t take me long to write. Fic requests are closed.
Mhhh I’m not sure, this would be quite hard to gauge I think. I’ll try my best.
Uchiha Men finding out you have an IUD/views on contraception
Indra:
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-This man would not be happy to hear you say you cannot conceive when he wants you to. He would absolutely tell you to get it removed ASAP. You don’t want children with him or something? Is that a joke? You need to give him an heir.
-If you tell him you’ve had it for a long time, he will retort that now you’re his wife and it is time to have a family with him.
- 10/10 commitment, 1/10 general approach, 0/10 women’s rights
Izuna:
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-He’s secretly a sweetheart. He would ask you why you did it and if you’re comfortable removing it because he wants a family with you. If you’re not, he’ll try to coax you into it, but he won’t push too far. He wants peace for his clan as much as peace in his household.
-Will be asking routine updates on whether you’re ready to take it off.
- 7/10 general approach, 9/10 communication, 7/10 women’s rights
Madara:
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-Is perplexed when he starts to see that no matter how many time he breeds you, you never get pregnant. There is no way he’s the problem. Could you be infertile? That’s not a thought Madara likes. He needs to pass on his genes, and he singled you out as the best woman to help him do that.
-So he asks you, and you tell him you cannot conceive at the moment because of your IUD. Madara is not happy. He isn’t going to be as controlling as Indra, but he will try to literally fuck the need to be bred into you. Will manipulate you into a breeding kink. And then he will dote on you, making sure you know how much he is committed to creating a family with you, how much he wants you to bear his children. Until you suddenly want it too and get that blasted thing removed. Another win for Madara.
- 6/10 general approach, 6/10 women’s rights, 8/10 gaslighting
Obito:
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-This man will break you with simping. When he finds out, he’s genuinely upset and a little embarrassed. After all, he’s been raving about putting a child in you when you two were having sex and now he finds out it was literally impossible for him to do so.
-He will shower you with love, say he wants a family with you so badly, tell you how good you’d look pregnant, say how much he wants to be a father and how good of a mother you’d be.
-Genuine love bombing: Obito is genuine in the efforts he’s putting in. He’s not trying to manipulate you consciously, he just wants it that badly, and is so upset that you have that IUD and he can’t make it a reality. What you’ll do is up to you, but he’ll never stop nagging you.
- 7/10 general approach, 8/10 women’s rights, 10/10 simping
Shisui:
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-Is the most normal about breeding kink. Will say it’s fine, but asks if one day, you might still be open to having children.
-Laughs it off with a sex joke.
-‘That’s good to hear, sweetheart, I’m not sure I can be trusted with pulling out in time’ he would laugh and joke.
-Sometimes will get thoughts of how cute it would be and how happy it would make him to make a family, and he asks how long you think you’re going to keep it.
-Engages in playful jokes about being a dad. Quick glances in your direction to see how you take it.
- 10/10 women’s rights, 9/10 general approach, 9/10 joking as a coping mechanism
Itachi:
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-Itachi is completely understanding of the notion of contraception. After all, who would want a child when they’re not ready? But he does want a family with you, and if the time is right and he doesn’t plan to play suicide with Sasuke, he will want you to be the mother of his children.
-Will inquire when you got it… for purposes. You don’t need to know he’s counting down how much time is left until it gets removed
-Will also inquire what the purpose of the contraception is. Is it to be able to have sex without risks until you are ready, or are you planning to not have children at all? He needs to be reassured that you do want a family with him one day, even if it’s not today. He’s patient, but he needs the constant reassurance that one day, he can go wild and give in to his breeding kink. Being an Uchiha is not easy.
- 9/10 general approach, 10/10 women’s rights, 9/10 paranoia
Sasuke:
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-You can do whatever you like, but he’s silently brooding over it. Secretly asks himself if you are trying to avoid having a family with him
-Wants to rebuild his clan with you. Will not say he wants you to get it removed. Will say “whatever”.
-You’ll have to go to him to have a conversation about it, and the fact that he wants a family has to be pulled out of his throat with pliers. You’ll have to do the leg work to communicate, but it’s really sweet once he lets go and is vulnerable enough to show you his true feelings.
- 3/10 general approach, 9/10 women’s rights, 10/10 emotionally stunted.
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runnning-outof-time · 6 months
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The first of a few :)
Tommy- (3 word sentence prompt) “Happy or Sad?”
Thanks for sending this in Liz! I’m sorry it took me a bit to get to writing it. This is a COMPLETE flip from the fic I shared earlier haha. Also I have to say that the bit at the end was inspired by the lovely Bri @there-goes-thefighter ‘s latest Tommy fic ‘Your Shadow Side’…it’s a bit different here, but the idea was stuck in the back of my mind nonetheless. Enjoy! :)
I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!
Part of my 3.5k Celebration - find other stories here!
Bedtime Stories
Tommy Shelby x Reader & Daughter
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Warnings: none
Word Count: 797
Summary: Tommy gets asked a question that leaves him speechless while he’s telling his daughter a bedtime story.
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“I want daddy to tell me a story tonight!” Isabella Shelby exclaimed, stamping her foot on the ground as she looked up at her mother. Her little hands were balled up into fists, and the glare on her face was one that could even rival her father’s. Wonder who she got it from?
(Y/N) sighed and looked away from her four year old daughter, at her wits end now. It had been a long day. Isabella woke up in a grumpy mood, so everything had been a fight with her. On top of that, Matthew, her two year old son, had just figured out how to get into things, so she’d been following him around the house to make sure he didn’t hurt himself or break anything.
“Dad’s busy with his work at the moment, darling,” she tried to reason with the child.
Isabella did not listen. “I’m going to go ask him,” she insisted, turning on her heel then so that she could make her way down the hall to the door of her father’s office.
(Y/N) stayed in the hallway, her arms crossed over her chest as she heard the muffled exchange between her husband and child. A look of surprise formed on her face when Isabella emerged triumphant from the office moments later with Tommy following behind her. She’s wrapped around his finger, (Y/N) thought to herself with soft laugh.
“Time for bed?” Tommy questioned as he approached (Y/N), chuckling at the fact that Isabella had walked right passed her without a word.
“It is,” (Y/N) responded with a nod, her eyes wide as she conveyed her exasperation to him. Tommy sent her a soft grin before he continued to follow his daughter to her room.
Once Isabella was settled, Tommy got into telling an elaborate story about a princess who had to go and save her darling dog from the grasps of an evil king — they’d just taken in Cyril and the little girl was obsessed with all things related to dogs. Isabella listened intently to the story, reacting to all of the twists and turns that it had. That was the thing she loved most about her dad’s bedtime stories: no one was the same. (Y/N) swore that he could have made a career in writing them…if he hadn’t went down other paths that is.
“We’re reaching the ending now, love,” Tommy warned his daughter as he took a moment’s pause. A pout formed on Isabella’s face; she didn’t want the story to be over yet. “I need to ask you about the ending…”
“What about it?” Isabella interrupted before he could get to the question, her eyebrows furrowing as she titled her head slightly.
“Happy or sad?” he asked, his brows raised as he waited for her answer.
“Happy,” the little girl answered without second thought. Tommy nodded and prepared to end the story. Isabella spoke again before he could get a word out, “who would ever choose sad?” she asked, her question one of the most genuine ones Tommy had ever heard.
“I…” he began to answer, but his words died in his throat as he really thought about the question she asked. He shook his head and ran his hand along his jaw, trying to think of a response that was worthy of such a question. “Someone who isn’t quite sure what happy is, I’d guess,” he finally responded, not sure if what he decided on was even good enough.
Isabella thought about it for a second, her pondering starkly present in her facial expression. “Well that isn’t us, right, daddy?” she then sweetly asked, her doe eyes finding his again.
In that moment, all the bad that Tommy Shelby had done was washed away. All the struggle and strife, the bad blood and the tunnels were the furthest thing from his mind. Now all that was present was the world that his darling daughter was imagining. One that only held good, one where everything ended happy. He was so thankful for her innocence, for the light that she brought into his life.
The slightest smile graced his lips as he shook his head ever so slightly. “No, love…that isn’t us,” he answered her as he sat a loving hand on her blanket covered knee. His smile grew with each second their eyes stayed connected, and he thanked whoever was mainf decisions in the sky for giving him this beautiful little girl.
“Are you gonna finish the story, dad?” Isabella asked, cutting through Tommy’s thoughts and bringing him back to reality.
Her expectant look made him laugh as he nodded his head. “Yeah, I’m gonna finish the story,” he answered her before going on with the happy ending she’d asked for.
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Tagged: @mystcldydrms @the-anxious-youth @cloudofdisney @look-at-the-soul @elenavampire21 @mrsalwayswrite @julkaamazing @evita-shelby @lilyrachelcassidy @notyour-valentine @shelbydelrey @theshelbyslimited @peakyswritings @just-a-blackhole @watercolorskyy @strayrockette @peakyduchesss @alexxavicry @captivatedbycillianmurphy @yummycastiel @dark-academia-slut @tommystargirl @emotionalcadaver @stevie75 @lyarr24 @signorellisantichrist @zablife @anotherblinder @cillmequick @dandelionprints @letal-y-poetica @gypsy-girl-08 @insanitybyanothername @depxiety @raincoffeeandfandoms @dragons-are-my-favorite @acewritesfics @forgottenpeakywriter @cljordan-imperium @brummiereader @areyenotfondofmelobster @everythingelseisextra @little-diable @thomashelbyswife @shaddixlife
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foreverdolly · 2 months
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this is a self pitying post and i’ll probably delete it later- but when i’m sad i tend to write it out. i’ve used this blog like a diary of sorts for the last two and a half years. i’ve developed a relationship with a lot of you on here and i appreciate all the love i’ve received so far on my last post. my friends that i have in real life, no matter how long i’ve known them, don’t know too much about my upbringing or my parents. i hate the idea of trauma dumping- it’s uncomfortable for other people: so don’t read this if you don’t want to. i wouldn’t blame you.
my dad died from cirrhosis due to alcoholism. he died miserable and alone. he had no friends. his family was sick of him. i tried to call him as often as i could but sometimes he could be mean if he was drunk. i knew not to call him after 11:00 in the afternoon because he would start to drink. he lived in his youngest brother’s basement and almost never came upstairs because he was embarrassed. i haven’t seen him in three years because he lives fourteen hours from me, but i tried my hardest to call him every week and keep him involved in my life. he never saw any of my homes, never met any of my friends, and never even saw me drive a car (i’ve been licensed since i was eighteen). i cried to him almost every week, begging him to get sober.
he never recovered from my parent’s divorce, and for that i feel so sorry. he called my mother his soulmate and always spoke in past tense- talking about when me and my brother were little. he would tear up when talking about the first time he ever saw me in the hospital after my mother gave birth, and he was vocal about the fact that i was his favorite. we shared a lot of the the same interests and always had fun when talking.
when my mom made a suicide attempt two years ago he was there for me almost everyday, calling me despite the demons he was battling with himself.
the last time i spoke to him was thursday- a week from the day he died. he told me that he almost called a treatment facility but he got tired and took a nap instead. his doctors appointment was today at one and he was going to ask to be admitted and then go to a rehab facility. i told him i’d send him money while he was in there- he hasn’t been able to hold a job since i was still in high school.
my dad was a chef. a damn good cook- classically trained in french cooking. he had the loudest laugh i’ve ever heard, so much so that it used to make me cry when i was a baby. we used to wear matching costumes and he’d sign me out from school on halloween and call me out the day after. he took me to my first concert, but he couldn’t afford both the gas and the tickets (so i paid for the gas with my pocket change at the age of thirteen). he wore adidas strictly- shell toe was his favorite.
when i was little my dad was on night duty while my mom was away: tucking us in, reading us books. he refused to read to me and walked out the door but not before saying “bed bugs and stuff”. i thought it was so funny. it became our saying. every night we spent with each other we said “bed bugs and stuff”. so that was my last send off to him. i hope he’s finally resting well and isn’t depressed, ashamed or lonely anymore where he is.
he died in his sleep. they found a solo cup filled with vodka next to his bed and i can’t stop thinking about the fact that he was going to get help today. he was yellow due to jaundice. what a cruel world.
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worksby-d · 8 months
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Could you write something about dad's bestfriend!Andy comforting reader after telling her parents they're together didn't go well?
YEP 🫡
Pairing: dad’s best friend!Andy Barber x fem!Reader
Summary: Exactly what the request says ✨
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Warnings: Age gap, comfort sex, 18+
Word count: ~1,300
a/n: Look at me sloooowly clearing out my inbox recently 🤭 Two years late, but dbf!Andy never goes out of style amirite girlies! Not sure if this was maybe supposed to tie in with a series back then, it could probably be read as part of A Great Mentor if so ☝️ 
─── ✧
Andy has tried his best to keep you in good spirits throughout the past week. And it’s worked for the most part. You’ve been grateful to be able to spend so much time with him, finally free of the weight keeping your relationship a secret was beginning to put on you. 
But as soon as you have a moment alone or a second without Andy purposely distracting you, you feel like shit deep down, unable to think about anything but the fact that your parents still aren’t talking to you or him.
You've been waiting for a call, or at least a text... Anything.
He has you cuddled next to him tonight as you watch a movie together, but your mind is racing, causing your heart to do the same, panic beginning to set in from dwelling on your negative thoughts.
You lean closer against his side, closing your eyes as you try to relax, but you need to be even closer.
Mustering some energy, you gently and wordlessly move so you’re straddling him, wrapping your arms around him like a koala. His arms hug around you tightly without any questions, and you melt against him, nestling your face against his neck. 
He knows you’ve had a hard couple days. He’s pressing soft kisses to the side of your face and your shoulder, and rubbing your back. 
“I love you,” he whispers, not missing the chance to reassure you. 
“You still love me?” You ask, almost inaudibly, voice muffled as you speak against the fabric of his shirt covering his shoulder. 
“I love you extra,” he says, knowing you need it. “I know this week was hard for you. I’m sorry.”
“After everything?” You continue to press.
“Of course…” His heart breaks. “You didn’t do anything wrong, angel.”
You’d beg to differ right now.
“I feel like I did everything wrong and dragged you with me while I did it.”
He does his best not to laugh at your dramatics. “No one did anything wrong. If I could fix everything right now, I would. But it’ll just take time.”
“I know,” you murmur. You have no choice, your voice would crack if you spoke any louder. “I love you, too.”
He does what he’s best at – Holding you and quieting the nerves that were overtaking you moments ago. 
“I wish I would have been there with you,” he speaks up softly. 
You insisted on breaking it to your parents alone. 
“I don’t,” you assure him with a faint scoff. You find it in you to joke a little bit. “My dad was so angry. I don’t know if you would have lived to tell about it.”
“I know,” he chuckles. “I just...” His voice trails off. He lets it go for now, no use in focusing on what ifs. “Are you ready for bed? We can go upstairs.”
“Not yet,” you say quickly. “Can you just hold me here for a little longer?” You add more quietly, comfortable in his embrace like this. “Please.”
“Yeah, baby.”
─── ✧
When he senses you falling asleep in his arms, he makes the decision for you. The calmest you’ve been the last couple days is when you’re sleeping, so he knows your slow breathing and relaxed weight on top of him means you’ve dozed off. 
He hates to do it, but he carefully pushes off the couch to sit up straighter. He holds you tighter as you begin to wake back up, not wanting you to have forgotten where you are and nearly fall out of his arms. 
“You fell asleep,” he whispers. “Let’s go upstairs.”
Letting out a yawn, you nod sleepily and climb off him. He keeps an arm around your waist to help you up the steps and toward his bedroom.
As he lays you on the bed, you hold your arms around his neck, bringing him down with you. 
“Andy,” you whisper, brushing your nose against his.
Your breath is warm against his lips and he can never resist you. His lips press against yours in a slow kiss, climbing into bed with you. A content sigh escapes him as he gives in completely.
Sharing deep and languid kisses, you subtly roll your body against his, once again plagued by the feeling of needing to be even closer. He doesn’t notice until your hands begin to wander, slipping down to the bottom of his shirt to untuck it from his pants. 
He pauses, reluctantly pulling away from you, just enough to peer down at you. 
“I don’t want to take advantage of you,” he says quietly. 
If it’s possible to be too considerate, that’s what Andy Barber is. 
You refrain from rolling your eyes. “It’s not taking advantage if I’m asking for it,” you joke, but there’s desperation in your voice. 
“I know,” he chuckles. “But I know you’re upset–”
“Stop, please,” you ask. Your voice barely reaches a whisper, eyes falling shut to put your all into not letting the thoughts back in your head. “I don’t want to think about it anymore tonight. Help me forget.”
“Are you sure?” He asks, studying your face, waiting for you to look back up at him. 
You don’t answer with words, instead pulling him back down, nodding softly before kissing him again. 
The way your hands roam each other’s bodies is slow, but not calculated. He finally lets you tug his shirt off of him, and his fingers fumble helping you out of your own clothes. 
When he moves down your body, he trails kisses along every inch of your skin, eliciting soft gasps from you, fingers digging into his skin as you grasp onto him. 
He situates himself between your legs, but you reach for his hands to get his attention. 
“Need you closer.” You shake your head, only wanting him on top of you. “Please.” 
He listens, coming back up so you’re face to face again. Your arms wrap back around him, as if you’re scared of him leaving. 
“Relax, pretty girl.” 
His voice is soft and comforting, contradicting the shot of pleasure that courses through you as his cock presses against your center, igniting a wave of warmth that washes over your body. 
You rest your cheek against the palm of his hand that’s cupping your face, letting out a moan, one in unison with him as he sets a steady rhythm. 
He knows your body better than you do, you think sometimes, knowing exactly how to make you come undone, make your eyes roll back, make you see stars. 
His lovemaking is mind numbing. 
You swear you don’t regain your senses until you feel him trying to gently push off of you, but you glide your hands from his sides to rest on his back, silently asking him to stay where he is, needing to feel him close to you longer, while you catch your breath. 
Resting his forehead against yours, he does the same before rolling over carefully, bringing you with him to lay on top of him. 
His chest is definitely up there on the list of most comfortable places to lay your head. Your heartbeat continues to go back to normal as you listen to his against your ear. 
“I love you so much. I never want you questioning that,” he whispers, rubbing your back. He knows you wanted to be done with that for the night, but he needs to do his part in continuing to reassure you. “Okay?”
Tears roll down your cheek and he can feel them wetting his skin as you nod. He’d like to hear you say you believe him, but he’ll take it for tonight.
─── ✧
Tag list: @patzammit @denisemarieangelina @thummbelina @pppsssyyyccchhhiiiccc @astheskycries @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @la-cey @turtoix @katiew1973 @harrysthiccthighss @tvckerlance @rocketrhap3000 @mrspeacem1nusone @murdcox @geminievans1 @doozywoozy @americasass91 @dwights-new-plague @wwwmarissa92 @redhairedfeistynerd @whxre4cevans @aubreeskailynn @white-wolf1940 @melchills-j @xoxabs88xox @before-we-get-started @chrissquares @christowhore @ice-dtae @mariestark @justile @rogersbarber @dilfbarber @livstilinski @payperhearts @vintagestarlight @gitasor @chaeycunty @miss-ariella @bemysugarbean @t-stark35 @seitmai @reginaphalange2403 @raelorns21 @mrsgweasley @pandaxnienke @brandycranby
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sheisjoeschateau · 2 months
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"Oh, so we DO love Steve..." | Part X
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⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ SERIES MASTERLIST ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
Steve Harrington x Bauman!fem!reader enemies to lovers, heavy angst, hurt/comfort, upside down mayhem, S2-S4, post S4 universe hot-take, end-of-the-world / dystopian setting, ugly fights turned smut (...but with hella plot). 18+
CHAPTER X WARNINGS/NOTES: t.w.'s - strong language, more angst, mention of dr*g abuse during childhood trauma, mentions of death and injuries, Max in a coma, fearful tears, shared sadness, major end-of-the-world terror talk. 18+
AUTHOR'S NOTE: As we dive deeper into just how in love Steve and Bauman continue to fall...we also dive deeper into darkness.
We get a glimpse into the childhood past of Bauman Squared.
Steve finally gets to laugh again with his kids -- and with the girl he wants to have his own kids with one day.
Dr. Owens comes back, but it's not why they expected. Erica is given the hardest burden of all. Robin & Eddie are the whacky aunt and uncle that everyone needed and basically get shit back on track while being thrown hard news. Argyle is actually just a kind dude. Nancy is pulling away, while Jonathan finally feels the gut-punching gravity of what he is losing. Jopper is still carrying the weight of both worlds.
And surprise, b*tches: DIMITRI IS BACK AND BOY IS HE SOOO BACK.
Lastly: chicken nuggets. That is all.
WHILE THIS IS A FANFICTION STORY: IT IS STILL MY WRITING. PLEASE RIGHTFULLY CREDIT ME WHEN REPOSTING OR SHARING. I DO NOT GRANT YOU PERMISSION TO POST MY WRITING AS YOUR OWN. - MISHA @sheisjoeschateau PROOFREAD UNTIL MY EYES BLED. IF THERE ARE STILL TYPOS, SORRY BOUT IT. 18+
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
OH SO WE DO LOVE STEVE | Chapter X
“Why do I feel like this is some sort of twisted intervention?”
Erica Sinclair stood in the kitchen next to Murray as he cooked up something to share with a table of adults and teens — plus her.
“In a way, it is,” Murray responded to her as he stirred his ingredients. 
“...okayyyy,” Erica sassed, suspiciously.  “...then why do you want me here but not my brother or my other friends?”
Murray rolled his eyes.  Erica’s attitude was truly the one thing that could bring Murray’s entire mental empire crumbling down like a tower of cards being blown over by a gust of wind.  He pointed his spatula in her direction.
“Think of it this way, kiddo,” he said through a wry, condescending smirk.  “It’s like getting invited to sit at the adults’ table instead of the kids’ table for thanksgiving.  And you’re the only one we’re inviting before you get to go up there and hang out with your little friends.  Alright?”
Erica narrowed her eyes.  “What do I need to know that they don’t?”
Sauce dripped from the spatula as he stared at her.  Christ, she was relentless.  Then again…at least she seemed somewhat perturbed by the idea of knowing things before her brother and their friends.  That was pretty damn selfless for Erica Sinclair.  She cocked an eyebrow at Murray — who squinted back at her.
“Okay, why are you not as willing about this as I thought you’d be…”
“Look,” Erica said, crossing her arms.  “If I’m going to be made to keep a secret?  I need to know all the facts first.  Especially if I have to keep it from my brother.  And Steve.  And Bauman.”
Murray sighed through his nose.  She was right.  Mature, and right.
“I don’t want you to keep it a secret for good,” Murray clarified, speaking slowly.  “I just — we just need you to be made aware of some things before we bring it to everyone else’s attention.  And truth be told?  Harrington needs a break.  So does my niece.  And your friends?  They need some time with mom and dad.  You do, too.  But right now?  You’re the party member in charge of taking on some big information before we spread it to the rest of them.  And quite frankly?  I’m counting on you to help me — and the rest of us — help break it to them.  Got it?”
Erica let all of that land, her guarded expression softening into one of civil understanding.  She pursed her lips, considering this.  Finally, she nodded.
“Alright.  Deal.”
Murray shot her a thumbs up, resuming his cooking.
“That’s really lumpy,” Erica pointed to his saucepan with a soured expression.
“Ohforheaven'ssake —”
__________________________
Robin had taken on laundry duty on Steve’s behalf, knowing that Jonathan intended to talk with him.  Which is why she’d asked Nancy to help her with it, and it has turned out to be a good thing.
Nancy was clearly fraying at the seams.  There was a lot going through her mind, and it was all spiraling fast.  She needed someone to talk to, but none of her options seemed safe. 
She had no idea how or when to break everything she had been feeling to Steve. 
Her relationship with Jonathan was so tense and strained, any conversation shared with him had just blown up. 
And her mom would need to know everything about the upside down, in order to give her proper advice…and at this rate, that option seemed to have no place in this world. 
She couldn’t go to Joyce, because that’s Jonathan’s mom. 
Hopper and Murray were out of the question. 
She wasn’t close enough with Eddie to even consider it. 
And Argyle?  Well, he’d said about as much as he could say.  Far more than what she’d expected, if she was being honest.  
Nancy’s only other option was Robin Buckley.
“God, I swear — the air’s a disease at this point.”
Robin had sat next to Nancy on the porch, carrying the laundry basket.  Nancy quickly wiped a few stray tears, which Robin pretended not to notice – even when Nancy shot her a very forced, tight-lipped grin.
“Yeah,” Nancy chuckled wetly.  “It’s uhh, yeah.  Plagued at this point.  Thanks, Vecna.”
Robin nodded with a smirk.  “Yeah.  Thanks a lot, Vecna.  Fuck you, man.”
That made Nancy giggle, which Robin was grateful to see.  She decided to start off slow, not wanting to force anything.  After all, clearly Nancy was clearly going through it.  And the way she and Robin had started off?  Not great.  Buckley was definitely not trying to push her luck.  Sure, the two of them had gotten along super well as time passed, truly becoming friends while living in Steve’s house.  But they weren’t exactly best friends.  Friends for sure.  But not like Nancy and Barb had been.  Not even close.
“You know,” Robin mused.  “Sometimes, I think back to high school and how…I never really had a best friend while I was there.  Not like you did.”
That made Nancy turn to look at her, curiosity radiating for her bright blue eyes.
“You and Barb,” Robin explained.  “You two were thick as thieves.  She always made sure to take extra notes in Click’s class for you.”
Nancy’s eyes shone with melancholy fondness.  “She did…?”
“Yeah,” Robin smiled.  “Always.  Saved them on little flashcards and everything.  She was always like, ‘I gotta make sure I get this for Nance.’  Or whenever something crazy went down in the classroom, I could tell she was just itching to tell you about during lunch or after school.”
Nancy beamed at that.  She shook her head, grinning widely.  “God, I swear… Barb was like — like that little old lady who couldn’t help but wanna gossip.  Even though she hated drama, she loved it at the same time.  As long as it wasn’t hers or ours.”
“That totally tracks,” Robin snorted.  “What an icon, really.”
“Schyeah,” Nancy giggled wholeheartedly.  “Yeah, she…she was the best.”
Robin watched as Nancy gnawed at her lip, feeling the wave of sadness wash over her.  
“I just wish…” Nancy murmured, voice shaky.  “Just wish that I could…talk to her sometimes, you know?  Not just to tell her how sorry I am.  For everything that happened before she…”
Nancy’s voice trailed off.  Robin dared to reach over and touch her shoulder, relieved when Nancy didn’t push her away or tense underneath her touch.
“I just wanna ask her questions,” Nancy’s voice shook.  “So many questions, like…like the way we used to.  As best friends.  About — everything.  Life, family, love…friends…the end of the fucking world…”
Robin nodded.  “Yeah.  Yeah, I know.”
Because Robin did know.  Whenever she had become best friends with Steve, it had made her world significantly brighter.  Her heart was full, and her soul had been lifted out of its constant anxiety-ridden state.  Robin had been so closed off to bonding with anyone, especially the likes of Steve Harrington.  Little did she know, that guy would end up being her truest best friend and confidant.  The one she could lean on, tell anything to and count on for the rest of her life.  However short that might be, given the end of the world… But she had Steve by her side, trusting him with every secret she had and her literal life in his hands.  
Barb had been that for Nancy.  But she was gone.
“I don’t know what to do,” Nancy’s voice cracked.  She looked over at Robin with tear rimmed eyes, fighting them from falling as she bit down on her trembling lip.  “About…anything.”
Robin kept listening, wanting so badly to go on a rant but willing herself not to.  Because right now, it’s Nancy who needs to rant.  She needed to ramble until she couldn’t anymore.
“I’ve been so…God, I’ve been so in love with Jonathan since we met and…got through all of this together.  It just…just...worked.  Clicked, made sense.  Way more sense than Steve, but — but Steve and I, we…what we had was…it was real.  Really real.  Even Barb saw it, she just — just didn’t want me getting hurt, or…losing myself for a guy.  But I didn’t really.  Steve never pushed me to do anything that I didn’t wanna do, or…wasn’t ready for.  Ever.  Not once.  He was kind to me, and…and I feel like…like I just… I think I’m the one who did wrong by him.  Not the other way around.  All because I just felt so…lost, and conflicted, and scared, and unsure, and…and…”
Nancy curled in on herself, tears falling down her cheeks as she ducked her face out of sight.  But Robin scooched closer to her, enveloping her into a comforting embrace as she wept.  And Nancy let her, allowing herself to lean against her.
“I told him what we had was bullshit and it wasn’t,” Nancy cried bitterly.  “It wasn’t, he's not -- I was just…so fucking mad that Barb was gone.  And it was easier to blame Steve, all because he wasn’t hurting the way that I was.  The way that I still am.  But that’s — that’s n-not — b-because he d-doesn’t…c-care…”  
Nancy’s shoulders convulsed, and Robin’s heart broke for her as she held her tighter.
“B-but Jonathan had lost Will, so h-he…he got it.  H-he knew wh-what I was…going through… And I-I j-just felt...so r-right with him.  Because l-looking at him didn’t remind me of…of…”
Nancy choked on a sob.  
Robin knew she meant Barb.  She didn’t have to say it.
“I’m angry.  For me, for Barb, for Steve, for Jonathan…my mom, dad, Mike…everyone.  All the time.  And I just d-don’t know what to do, because…Jonathan shut me o-out, and w-wanted to b-break up with m-me all because he felt like…he was…holding me back, and wouldn’t just t-talk…to me…and then S-Steve… Steve, h-he wanted me back b-but now…h-he…he loves…he loves…”
Nancy ugly cried into her palms, muffling the noise so that it wouldn’t be heard from anyone inside.  Robin clung to her, rocking them back and forth with some gentle, soothing shushes.
“He loves her, Robin,” Nancy cried, heartbreak and anguish lacing her voice.  “He loves her, and s-she loves him back.  S-so much…b-better than I d-did…and I…I should be…so h-happy for him.  And h-her, but I just…I just…wonder if I…did I…did I m-mess up…?  Did I lose the p-person I was s-supposed to b-be with?  I just didn’t…think he’d…move on…and that’s so…fucking SELFISH of me…”
Robin squeezed her.  “It’s not selfish.  It’s human.  Steve is amazing.  But Nancy…it’s okay that you didn’t go back to him.”
“But you thought I should,” Nancy leaned back now.  She looked at Robin dead in the eye with bloodshot, red rimmed eyes.  They swam in regrets, sorrows and bitterness.
“You and Eddie both thought that we should,” she said, voice croaked and upset.  “Y-you both…thought that we…shouldn’t have…broken up, or…”
“You’re right,” Robin admitted, feeling bad but deciding it was best to just own up to it.  “You’re right, I did.  We did.  Me and Eddie.  But Nancy…sometimes we’re just so distracted by what seems right…that we can’t see what’s actually right in front of us.”
Nancy looked at her quizzically.  Robin sighed.
“Look, when you left Steve,” Robin explained, taking her hand into both of hers.  “Back in senior year, and you got with Jonathan…you two had your own journey.  You had each other.  Steve?  Steve had no one during his — except for the kids…and Bauman.  Because back then, he didn’t know yet.  He didn’t know about her and Murray intervening —”
“Yeah, I know,” Nancy said bitterly.  “We all know that now.”
“Just hear me out,” Robin pleaded with her softly.  “I promise, I’m with you, alright?”
Nancy stared at her for a moment, finally softening her tense jaw and nodding once.  Robin picked back up, on cue.
“Steve still had a lot of growing up to do.  On his own.  Dustin was the first to reach out to him.  Well, he basically forced himself on Steve.  And Steve needed that.  He’s an only child.  He needed a little brother to give him grief, and boss him around and pick on him.  You have Mike.  Steve didn’t have that until Dustin wormed his way into his life." Robin added with a smile, " ...and his heart.”
Nany thought about that, expression pensive with realization.
“Then Bauman came along,” Robin continued.  “She was Steve’s age… You and Jonathan were off with the adults.  He got left behind to watch the kids with her.  They went through…a lot of shit that night.  You did, too.  But so did they.  They fought off Billy Hargrove.  They protected the kids, fought off the demodogs in the tunnels.  They survived the night together.  You know what that feels like.  You and Jonathan bonded that way.  Right?”
Nancy hesitates but looks back at her, sniffing.  Eventually, she nods again.
“Right," Robin exhales deeply, proceeding. "So Steve… Steve had someone his age to be around, along with the kids.  And that was great.  Because she’s independent and badass, but also really chill and down to earth.  Like, some sort of femme tomboy.  Which Steve lowkey kind of needed, she really was exactly what --"
“Robin, I get it,” Nancy snapped, not wanting to hear about you in a complimentary way.  At least not at this moment.
“No, hear me out,” Robin insisted, giving her hands another squeeze.  “You need to hear this, Nancy, alright?  You know you’re beautiful.  You know Steve has been helplessly in love with you for years.  That’s not even a question.”  
Robin paused, shifting gears again as she refused to let Nancy look away from her.  
“...but Steve had to move on.  Or…find ways to convince himself that he could.  And Bauman?  She was there for that.  She was around, during all his growth.  And trust me – it was ugly.  You have nothing to envy there.  God, the way that they argued?  The way Steve talked to her, honestly?  Honestly.  You would’ve slapped him.  I sure as hell did a few times.  Mostly verbal slapping.  But I hit him a few times, not gonna lie.  You’ve seen the highlights of Steve’s growth.  You have seen the best parts of him, but…but Bauman was there for all of it.  She got to see it all happen in real time, from the second you and Jonathan met back up with them to right now.  And she owned up to her shit, too.  It wasn’t her fault, by no means was it her fault.  But hey, she took the hits.  Many times.  And she still ended up falling in love with Steve, who she swore was the last person who would ever win her over.  Those two knuckleheads were relentless whenever I came into the picture.  Fighting like lovers in a quarrel with absolutely zero history of affection to show for it.  But still, they got through shit together.  They put their differences aside for the kids, and when it came to fighting off the Russians?  She and Steve honestly kept me so sane.  And they kept us safe, too.  Me, Dustin and Erica.  They didn’t get along in the real world, but in the upside down world?  They did.  They didn’t even think twice.  Steve grew into a way better person because of her.  And she opened up a lot more because of him, and the kids.  She didn’t grow up with siblings either.  That’s another thing they have in common.”
Nancy took all of that in with a solemn expression.  Robin let that sink in before continuing.
“I know this is…a lot.  But really, Nancy…so much happened while you were gone.  Those two fell in love over time without even knowing it.  Shit, we didn’t know it either.  That was a plot twist for all of us — including Murray.  Despite what he says, that guy does not know everything.”
Nancy scoffed.  “I know that.”
“Of course you do.  We all do.  He does, too.  Especially now.  Now that his niece and Steve are clearly so head over heels in love with one another.”
Nancy’s heart sank at that.  She knew that it was true.
“I’m not…” Nancy mumbled, eyes downcast.  “I’m not mad at her for falling in love with him.  Or him.  I just…can’t help but wonder if I messed up.  Missed out on someone that I loved more than I allowed myself to when we were together.”
“You couldn’t have loved him more back then, Nancy,” Robin corrected her.  “Because who he was then, is not who he is now.  And who he is now is someone that Bauman has played a huge role in him becoming.”
Nancy sniffed a few times, bringing her knees to her chest and lost in thought.
“Do you still love Jonathan?”
Nancy looked at her, surprised.  “What?”
“Tell me what you’re feeling there,” Robin pressed gently.  “Why is that going wrong again?”
Nancy got defensive.  “Um, what’s wrong is that he clearly planned on leaving me while I was back here being loyal to him.”
“Right,” Robin mused.  “But…what about after he got back?  What happened then?”
Nancy opened her mouth to speak, but couldn’t.  She thought about that for a while.
“We just…” she started.  “...we just…moved past it.  We let it go.”
Robin nodded slowly.  “After all you two have been through…knowing damn well that things need to be talked about…you both really thought that was best?”
“He doesn’t ever tell me how he actually feels,” Nancy snapped.  “I’m so sick of it.  I always have to push him to tell me things.  He just — shuts me out.  Clams up, retreats.  He won’t even tell me when he’s upset about something unless I make him.”
“Well then,” Robin nods.  “That’s definitely on him.  But what about you?”
Nancy scrunches her face in confusion.  
“Why didn’t you tell him how you felt either?” Robin asks, unblinking.
Nancy stares at her, not knowing how to answer that.
“I told him that I love him,” Nancy whispers.  “And that I…that we’re fine.”
Robin’s expression softens.  “Do you wanna be?”
Nancy’s face crumbles.  “I…I want…”
Robin waits, not knowing what to expect but knowing that it’s getting somewhere.  
“I want him to love me again,” Nancy cries in despair.  “I want him to fight for me, and — and love me the way that I thought that he did.  That he would.  That he always would —”
Robin holds Nancy again as she convulses with sobs in her arms.  They stay that way for a little while, allowing the dust to settle.  Nancy has said enough for now.  It would all unravel itself more over time. 
Meanwhile, Eddie had told Jonathan to make his way upstairs and talk with Steve.
“You’re on, buddy boy,” Eddie told him with a hard pat on the back.  
So while Jonathan made peace with Steve, Nancy had finally released some of her emotions and confided in Robin.
And now, all the adults were in the kitchen as Murray made some food for the older teens and Erica.  They’d asked Robin and Eddie to make sure that Argyle, Jonathan and Nancy were all going to be present for it, along with Erica before she could go upstairs and join the kids.
So here they all were now: sitting at the dinner table while Murray and Erica served them up plates and bowls of random foods.  
Jonathan had watched Nancy make her way into the kitchen with Robin, newly fresh faced and eyes puffy from crying.  She wore her pajamas now, having taken a quick shower and washing off the anguish from her meltdown earlier.  Jonathan’s heart cracked in two, and it did even more as Nancy went to sit next to Robin.  He stood up, unable to help himself.
“I got you a seat here,” he said, voice shaky.
Nancy had looked over at him, eyes cold and expression blank.
“That’s alright,” she said, voice level and cool.  “We share a room.”
Nancy sat next to Robin, demeanor cool and calm and collected.  She was stiff, but there was a chilling resilience to her that Jonathan had not seen in a while.  It terrified him, making his anxiety spike.  Had he lost her?  Was he too late?
He swallowed hard, accepting it — given everyone else at the table.  Hopper had awkwardly reached for some pepper as this was happening, working in slow motion as he felt really uncomfortable.  So Jonathan just nodded, and Joyce gave him a sympathetic look as she placed glasses of water and tea in front of everyone.
Eddie made concerned eye contact with Robin as he poured himself some water.  Yikes.
“I’ll sit next to you, my dude,” Argyle said warmly, knowing he needed to step in.  Jonathan was grateful for that, but still dying inside as he kept stealing glances at Nancy — who looked anywhere except his way.
Murray clicked his tongue loudly. “Alrighty then. Shall we?”
With a thud, he set down his plate. Joyce clenched her jaw but took a deep breath.
“Lay it on us,” Eddie said with a deep exhale, sitting down on the other side of Argyle. 
“Yeah, what’s this pow-wow and why is it just this group who's on it?” Erica questioned as she stationed herself on the other side of Robin. 
“Right,” Hopper sighed before shoveling a mouthful of mashed potatoes into his mouth and leaning back to chew, readying himself. Everyone waited patiently.
“Here’s the deal,” he began, leaning forward and eyeing everyone individually as he spoke. “No one here is being made to keep a secret. That’s not what’s going on.”
“So then why is it private?” Robin asked curiously. 
“Because right now…we need to set some things straight. Set in stone.  Before we dive into our group meeting tomorrow. Consider this…a board meeting of sorts.”
Jonathan furrowed his brow. “Don’t we want Bauman and Steve for that?”
Hopper sighed deeply, rubbing at his beard. “This affects them. And the kids.”
Eddie raised his eyebrows at that, feeling nervous. He looked over at Robin, who looked just as worried.
Erica scrunched her face up. “Then why am I here?…”
“Because I need one of you kids to be level headed and vouch for me,” Hopper explained. “And for Joyce and Murray. We’ve spent a lot of time figuring this out. Weighed out our options, talked to El about it.”
“Does she know?” Nancy asked.
“Some,” Hopper nodded. “Most… Not all.”
Erica leaned forward, truly listening and accepting that she was clearly going to need to stick with some sort of plan that her friends were not going to be keen on…
Hopper contemplated his next words carefully.
“Look. Tonight, I need those kids to rest. To laugh, play some card games. Eat too much candy, and just have a good night. Soak up all the fun they can get before this mandate goes into effect soon. And before we have to go forward with a plan.”
Hopper made sure that everyone was with him on that.  Off their nods, he continued.
“There’s two groups. One that’ll stay here, in hiding. Down in the basement, where we’ve already started making up basecamp. They’ll have to stay hidden.  Out of sight.  Quiet.  On high alert.  It’s a gamble.  Just because they’ll be home…it doesn’t guarantee them any safety.”
Hopper took a deep breath, eyes filled with dread.  He rubbed at the gap between his pinched brows.
“…the other group will have to risk getting back out there.  And we won’t be anywhere that’s not swarmed and completely surrounded by the government and — god-knows-who-else, before we can get ourselves back near the largest gate that’s torn itself open and is ready to swallow Hawkins.”
Everyone’s blood ran cold. 
No one was safe. They weren’t before, but now? Nothing was off the table. Everything was high risk, no matter where anyone was stationed.
“If you’re sitting here,” Hopper continued slowly, voice grave, “at this table, listening to this conversation…minus Erica and Murray...you’re in Group 2. ”
Nancy and Jonathan both felt their chests constrict, but they understood. It didn’t surprise them per se. And at this point, nothing should scare them. But it did.
Joyce looked at her eldest son, torn but knowing it had to be done.
Erica looked over at Murray, who gave her a soft nod.
Robin and Eddie looked at each other, along with Argyle, shuddering. 
“Dimitri is going with us,” Hopper added.
“Who’s he?” Jonathan asked.
“Russian soldier,” Joyce told him, holding up a hand to clarify. “He’s on our side.”
Jonathan hesitated but eventually gave her a small nod. He looked over at Nancy, who was staring down at the table with her teeth sunk into her bottom lip.
“He’s got insight,” Hopper continued. “Knows what we’re dealing with, and how to handle what we’re all up against.  We’ll need as many of us as we can get out there.  Those of us who know the risks, and know how to navigate this world.”
Robin processed that, thinking. “So that…where does that leave Steve and Bauman?”
Hopper was quiet. The way he gnawed his cheek made it clear that this was where it got messy.
“Steve is on the frontlines with us,” Hopper explained carefully. “…and Bauman is stationed back here with Murray and the kids, along with Dr. Owens.”
Robin’s heart sank, and so did Eddie’s. They both shared a sad, all-knowing look.  They knew this wasn’t going to go well.  At all. They knew that Steve was going to flip his shit at just the idea of leaving you out of his sight.
“Won’t Dr. Owens have a target on his back?” Eddie asked, concerned. “Won’t that — won’t that draw more danger here…?”
That made Robin look at Hopper, wide-eyed. The retired cop looked pale, eyes full of dread.
“He has to be here in case anything happens to Bauman or Max,” he explains solemnly. “Because if shit goes south here…they’ll need to run.”
Jonathan felt sick.  This also meant leaving Will behind.  “But…how? How can they run?”
“That’s where I come in,” Murray chimes in. “Between me and Erica and Dustin, we’ll be able to keep a close eye out for a signal — which Will can help us navigate.”
“Because he’s still connected to it all,” Joyce explains sadly.  “He still…feels it. He senses when it’s near.”
“Which is why he’ll be able to give us a warning,” Murray nods, adding to Joyce’s input. “Since El has to be out there with you guys, we’ll still have a connected source that's here with us.”
“The kids can’t do this,” Hopper adds, tone firm. “Not this time.  El doesn’t count, as much as I want her to stay back.  She can’t.  I know that.” He looks at Erica with parental eyes.  “But as far as the rest of you kids go?  No more.  It’s already bad enough having to risk you all staying here.  But if this is how it’s gotta go down?  You’re staying where there’s a controlled space, with 2-3 solid abort mission plans — which Murray knows from top to bottom.”
Erica hangs her head, but she nods. She knows this makes sense. 
“As for Bauman,” Hopper continues, eyes sad. “She’s not able to get back out there. Between her heart issues and her bad shoulder and ribs…she has to stay put.”
“No, I agree with that,” Robin says, voice full of gravel before she clears it. “But, umm…I’m just…really worried that…well it’s just — Steve, he’s um, he’s —”
“He’s going to have to do this,” Hopper interjects, but not unkindly. In fact, it’s full of empathy and remorse. “He knows the ways. You’ll all need him. His stamina, his strength. He’s strong, good with a bat and can outrun shit.  He also knows what to keep an eye out for, whatever comes our way.”
Eddie gulps, partially because he’s terrified about facing the underworld again…but also because he knows that Steve will be a wreck the entire time he’s gone with them and not with you. And if Eddie’s being honest, the idea of leaving you and the kids behind is killing him too. He’s especially grown to love you and Dustin over the last year.
“This isn’t open for discussion,” Hopper says, voice firmer and tone low.  “Tomorrow, when we have our living room meeting, I’ll be conveying this to everyone…along with Murray and Joyce.  And I need to know I have each and every one of you on our side.  Those kids are going to raise hell.  All of them are.  And this plan is not changing.  It’s either this…or we all stay hunkered down until we rot.  Am I making myself clear?”
Nancy and Jonathan nodded first, quickly followed by Robin and Eddie.
“Yes sir,” Argyle spoke first, and for the first time he genuinely looked aware of just how heavy all of this stuff really is.  Jonathan gave his shoulder a quick squeeze.
“Erica,” Hopper was looking directly at the youngest person sitting across the table.  “I’m counting on you.  I know that’s not fair, but I am.  You’re tough as nails.  You’re gonna have to be that way with your brother, and his friends.  Your friends.  You'll have to be hard...but gentle enough to get it through to him.  I don’t care what you gotta do, you do it.  Whatever you have to say?  Say it.  And if anybody gives you shit for knowing this before they did…send them to me.  Understood?”
Erica looked back at Hopper with the most somber expression.  But she nodded.
“Understood,” she said, voice low.
Hopper gave her a curt nod before looking over at the older teens.
“As for you guys,” he said.  “We all know the shit that just went down yesterday at the fence.  Bauman’s always been at the frontlines with us.  She can’t be now.  And Steve cannot hang back.  He’s got too much strength that we can’t afford to not have on our side of this battle.  And I don’t care if Bauman insists she can do it.  She can’t, and she won’t.”
“And if she gets stubborn,” Murray interjects, voice fierce.  “Tell me.  If she tries pulling a fast one?  You tell me.  Capiche?”
Eddie and Robin quickly nod up and down.
“I’ll talk to him if it gets bad,” Jonathan says in a weak voice.
Nancy narrows her eyes at him.  Since when do he and Steve talk?
“Good,” Joyce says with a sad, tight-lipped grin and nod at her son.  “He’ll need it.”
"I'll be there for him, too," Robin nodded at Jonathan.
“Will we be able to stay in contact with them at least?” Eddie asks pathetically.  “Via the walkies?”
“When necessary...yes,” Hopper confirms.  “We’ll have to be scarce about it.  Selective.  Nowhere is safe.  It’ll have to be reserved for vital communication only.”
Eddie frowned, but nodded in understanding.  Robin was currently biting her palm, consumed with dread and sickening anxiety.  Leaving you behind?  The kids?  Even Murray, who everyone had come to appreciate in their own weird sort of way — mostly because of how much they all loved you.  He was an extension of you.  The whole situation just felt…fucked.
But wasn’t everything fucked?  Wasn’t this entire world so catostrophically fucked in every single which way, seemingly irreparable?  
Was there actually an end to this nightmare?  A world in which the upside down would cease to exist…monsters would go back to their storybooks and dark, twisted fairy tales…the moon would only ever symbolize light within forgotten darkness...and the sun would never hide behind the ashy debris that currently clung to the air, just outside their windows?
Despite how everything looked grim, with seemingly no end in sight…you all persisted in choosing to believe.  Yes.  Yes, this was going to end.
The end of the world was nearing.  It was inevitable.
But it wouldn’t be your world.
***
You never really put much thought into what having a family would feel like one day.
You’d wondered.  Every little girl does.  In young girlhood, there’s the beauty of innocence that protectively surrounds all grown-up dreams that fuel your wildest imagination.  The dreams of never having to go to school, and being in charge of everything you want.  The dreams of being able to eat whatever you want, whenever you want.  The dreams of meeting your future husband, and getting to wear a big white, sparkly ballgown as you walk down the aisle to your happily ever after.  The dreams of being a princess in a big castle, ruling the land and having cake for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and tea parties everyday with your friends.
Sure, you’d had those dreams as a little girl.  How could you not?  It was inevitable.
But as you grew older, you didn’t really have a chance to fantasize about much.  You’d been made to grow up from a very young age.  Your grandmother had been there for you enough.  She kept a roof over your head.  Food on the table.  A very generous allowance, even though you never asked for one and you’d gotten yourself a job by the age of 13 painting peoples’ houses and doing yard work.  You’d even gotten hired by your uncle to do data entry for him, along with a couple of his contacts who did intense investigative research and needed someone to work remotely.  You earned your own living, and you did upkeep on your grandmother’s house — despite her never asking you to do so.  She was gone a lot.  She wasn’t very old.  Just a smoker who liked casinos and taking trips with her “friend” from time to time.  A woman, who she only ever referred to as her "assistant."  You knew better than to believe that, but you never said anything about it.  She was a closeted lesbian — which is why Robin coming out of the closet for you had been the easiest news to take, let alone support.  Your grandmother was a tough, long-acrylic-nails-donning boss bitch who did whatever the hell she wanted.  You’d gone with her many times to some casino resorts, mostly staying in the hotel room or just walking around the city.  It felt like living with a Mafia Mobwife.  It was cool, for the most part.  But it definitely meant being able to hold your own.  She’d raised herself when she was a kid — and in most ways, you did too.
It’s why you’d spent so much time with your uncle, who didn’t live very far.  He was home a lot.  Given his line of work, he didn’t go out much.  He became even more of a hermit as the years went on, and you liked that.  It meant consistency.  His spare room basically became your room.  It couldn’t exactly be considered a “guest room” when he never had guests over.  You’re the only person he invited over for company, and he loved it.  The two of you got along effortlessly.  His dark humor rubbed off on you early on, which your grandmother shared in but she wasn’t nearly as quick-witted as Murray.  That’s where you got it from.  But your dry, snarky wit was much more selectively timed than his.  He was all over the place.  You had solid social cues, given that you went to school and were around people often.  Your uncle was definitely an oddball.  But you loved him to death, and you got him better than anyone else did.
You weren’t babied.  You weren’t coddled, or sheltered, or given false hope about the world.  It’s why you held your own, and it’s also why you never victimized yourself.  It was to a fault, but you believed it was for the best.
So when Clark broke your heart into a million pieces, you told yourself it had been a risk from the start.  A gamble, just like the poker tables at those casinos that your grandmother frequented all the time.  Love was a dangerous game, and it spared no one.  There were winners and losers — and you’d lost this one.
But right now, in this moment, you felt as though you had just won every single jackpot that there was to win.  
Because right now, you were sitting in Steve’s lap on the floor of Max’s room in his big house, holding cards closely to your chest as Lucas screeched GO FISH at Dustin.  Steve’s hand was in plain sight, and if you were a cheater you’d have him beat in seconds.  But you didn’t need to win a stupid card game…because you had won the greatest game of all: life.
El and Mike were cuddled up close to each other, giggling and being young teens in love.  In a normal world, you would assume it to be puppy love between them.  But this world wasn’t normal, and the shit that they’d been through together wasn’t any different than what you and Steve had been through together.  It was real love, and you let them be that way.
Lucas was seated next to Max in her bed, holding her hand and laughing like a kid again.  Dustin was hoarding all of the candy from his backpack (so much for sharing) and laughing like a buffoon.  He bickered with Steve and the kids as usual, but something about it was just so…bright.  Hearty laughter bounced off the walls, and there were so many times that Steve had belly laughed — along with you and the other kids — that you’d all lost count.
Sometimes, you swore that you saw Max’s lips twitch.  As if she could hear you all in her coma, wanting to laugh along with everybody.  Lucas would talk to her as if she could hear you all just fine, squeezing her hand and kissing her forehead while showing her his hand in cards.  Dustin even gave her a sleeve of her favorite candy — just for her.  He might not have basic manners with the rest of you, but Max?  Always.  
Will was keeping score, seated next to you and Steve with the biggest smile you had ever seen him wear.  He laughed hysterically the entire night, even going as far as verbally expressing adoration for you and Steve.  Dustin would pretend to gag, but Will would just tell him he knew better than to think that the curly-haired smart alec wasn’t completely in love with the two of you being together.  Dustin had grinned all dopey and wide, rolling his eyes but not arguing with him any further.  
At some point, Mike suggested all swapping ghost stories.  
Lucas had barked the loudest laugh.  “How about the one we’re currently living??”
“Hey, hey,” Steve interjected.  “I got a better idea.  Tell your most embarrassing story.  One you’re scared shitless to tell.”
You'd grinned in his arms, snickering.  “Oh I got plenty of those.”
“I mean hey,” Dustin shrugged with a mouthful of candy.  “If we’re gonna die, we might as well get real.”
“Okay chill, we’re not going to die,” Steve scoffed, hiding his internal worry.
“It’s possible,” Mike shrugged, grabbing another bag of M&M’s.
Steve huffed.  “Dammit, Wheeler —”
Mike’s devilish grin was infuriating yet endearing at the same time.
“I wish Max could hear all of this,” El said with a tinkering laugh.
You gave her the warmest of smiles and a wink.  “Trust me.  She does.”
“Hell yeah,” Lucas smiled wide, squeezing Max’s hand.  “I’ll even tell one of her stories, for her.”
“...dude, she’s gonna kill you,” Dustin warned him, but there was a smirk lifting at the corner of his lips.
“I’ll go first,” Will announced, laying on his stomach as he ate some popcorn.  “One time?  I was asleep in bed but I woke up because I heard Jonathan moaning so loudly — like, disturbingly loud —”
“Okay, maybe I needed to lay down some ground rules here —” Steve starts with a very tight voice as you snorted into your palm.
“Just hear me out,” Will laughs, holding a hand.  “I thought it was with a girl —”
“William,” Steve scolded.
“But he was in the bathroom,” Will talked over him.  “Shitting his brains out.”
Dustin cackled while Mike audibly expressed disgust while laughing at the same time.  El looked shocked, giggling hysterically into her hand.
“Damn, that bad?!” Lucas roared.
“He lit every candle in the house,” Will cackled.  “Mom went to use it shortly after him and came barreling into our rooms to ask us in a panic what had died up one of our butts!”
Steve collapsed into you laughing, and you couldn’t even breathe from laughing so hard.  It was that sort of deep laughter that’s so painful because it’s quiet before you’re able to finally erupt with loud laughs that help you come down from a high.  All the kids were a fit of cackles and giggles, too.  Erica made her way into the room finally, jumping right into things and bringing cookies with milk.  All of you exchanged stories, allowing yourselves to only cry tears of joy.  It was exactly what you all needed, long overdue.
And for the first time in ages — none of you thought about the upside down, or the impending doom that awaited you just outside of the Harrington house throughout all of Hawkins.
That night, you and Steve tucked every single of your kids into their assigned sleeping bags and cots.  Lucas stayed with Max in her bed, asking you sheepishly if that was alright.  You’d nodded, along with Steve — more than approving.  And given you both would be chaperoning that night in the same shared room, you also let Mike and El cuddle up together in a sleeping bag.
“Hands outside of the covers, Wheeler,” Steve warned him, but he gave him a wink — adding please at the end.  Even Mike gave him a smile and nod, like a little kid who felt called out but also didn’t have any intention of disobeying.
Dustin and Will joked in high pitched voices about being bunkmates with their sleeping bags next to each other, given they were the two singles of the group.  Technically, Erica was too.  But even if she wasn’t, she would still demand her own space.  She had situated herself on the floor beside Lucas’s side of the bed, not planning to give him a hard time for a good while given what was in store for everyone tomorrow.
As for you and Steve — the two of you had stationed yourselves in the center of the room, closest to the door.  That way, you could see all your kids at any point during the night and also be the first to fight off any harm coming your way, should danger lurk on the other side of the locked bedroom door.
Steve ruffled Dustin’s hair as he dozed off, earning a sleepy little “hmph” from him.  After he made sure all of them were comfortably settled in for the night, he crawled over to you.  His nail bat was propped somewhere nearby — ready to be swung into action if need be.  But the need for it that night never came.
You curled into Steve’s chest, breathing in his clean, masculine scent and allowing it to fill all of your senses.  Sighing contentedly, you felt a rush of warmth wash over you as his lips pressed into the top of your head.
“I love you so much,” he whispered.
“I love you more,” you murmured in the softest of whispers.
You felt him chuckle against you.  “Impossible,” he breathed into your hair, pulling you so close to him you might as well be the same body.
And had you not been so completely relaxed in his arms, you might have fought him on it.  The whole "I love you more" thing. In fact you definitely would have.  But you just hummed, dozing off in his strong arms and allowing sleep to find you.
***
Waking up had been beautiful. The sun was even more hidden than usual, plagued by the new world coming into fruition. But despite the lack of sunshine outdoors, you felt as though it shone through the entire room as all the kids woke up and whispered to each other. You pretended not to hear them when they talked about you and Steve. Because if you were being honest? You’d been dying to hear their uncensored thoughts. If they thought that you weren’t listening, they wouldn’t hold back from saying what was actually on their mind.
Turns out?  All of them wanted this. The two of you together.  They laughed about how some of them thought that Steve was going to end up with Robin at first. 
“No way,” Lucas shook his head in a confident whisper. “Those two? They’re like brother and sister.”
“Yeah, but Bauman’s so out of his league,” Mike whispered back.
“She is not,” Will added in a defensive whisper.
“She so is,” Mike whispered indignantly.
“No way, Steve’s awesome,” Dustin defended in a whisper.
“Yeah but like,” Mike whispered, pondering with a sigh. “I mean yeah. He is. I like him. He’s cool. Way cooler than I thought he was at first. But Bauman’s literally a badass. She doesn't care what people think.”
“Steve doesn’t care anymore,” Erica chimes in, speaking softly. She’s actually pleading Steve’s case and it’s adorable.  “He used to. But when we were down there with the Russians? And he had to wear that stupid sailor outfit for work?…”
“Oh my god,” Dustin snickered. “That shit was so funny.”
“He looked like Shirley Temple from the Good Ship Lollipop,” Lucas snickered back, and Will had to shush them so that they wouldn’t wake you up.
“My point is,” Erica continued with sass. “Steve doesn’t give a shit what anyone thinks of him now. I mean…he gave her hell the whole time I was around ‘em.”
“I still don’t get that,” Mike whispered.
“Me either,” El added quietly.
“What do you mean?” Dustin whispered in confusion. “I told you guys the whole story. That once upon a time ramble I had to sit through when Murray basically went on to give us an entire rundown on the two of them?”
“Well duh,” Mike whispered in annoyance. “I know that. But dude…she’s…like, she's...”
“Hot.”
Everyone went quiet, and you stiffened as you held back laughter. Because the person who had called you hot?  It was El.
“Bauman is hot,” El repeated.
Eventually someone snorted. Then, they all did. You bit back laughter, blushing into Steve’s chest with your face kept hidden.
“You’re hot,” Mike added to her in a coy whisper.
“No, you are,” she whispered back sweetly.
“Enough,” Erica whispered definitively. 
“Max thinks that Steve is hot,” Lucas scoffed.
“He is,” Erica and El said at the same time.
“Hey,” Mike whined, and they all shushed him.
“Face it, dude,” Dustin whispered flatly. “He is. I wish I looked like him.”
“You look great, man,” Will assured him. “You got a girl like Suzy. You gotta be a stud to catch someone like her.”
Dustin had blushed at that with a wide, dopey grin. “Think so?”
After listening to them chat some more, eventually Steve started to stir. He’d told them good morning, to which Dustin all too happily responded with a very loud good morning back —- making Steve audibly groan and bite back curse words. The kids all snickered. 
Will started handing out drawings out to everyone. You all had been sketching and drawing together in your assigned room earlier the day before, while Steve had been getting Max’s room ready.  Will had told you all to draw a picture of someone else in the party. He’d even chosen who was drawing who.  
Will and Lucas drew each other.
Mike and Erica drew each other.
El and Dustin drew each other.
And you drew Steve, before he joined you all and eventually drew his original art piece of you while you all played a round of the Game of Life.
Here you were now: holding your drawing close to your chest, and wiggling your eyebrows at Steve. He gave you the most adorable smirk, his cocoa brown eyes still a bit sleepy and his perfect hair the sexiest case of bed head. He stretched, toned arms flexing and his white t-shirt clinging to his muscles in all the right places while being loose enough to wanna rip it off of him…
Not the time, Bauman, you mentally scolded yourself.
Steve had reached underneath his pillow to fetch his drawing of you, holding it to his chest and sitting across from you — crossed-legged and shooting you a wink. All the kids mirrored you both, sitting opposite their assigned art piece subject with throaty giggles and snorts. 
Will looked at everyone excitedly, like a proud art professor, ready for his classroom to partake in show-and-tell.
“Alright,” he smiled. “Everyone ready?”
“Yeah, you go first, Byers,” Steve nodded at him with an encouraging grin.
Will blushed. “Oh…well…I mean…I should go last. You guys first. On the count of 3, everyone turn your photos around to your partner.”
Mike snorted as he stared down Erica. “Howdy, partner,” he drawled in a fake accent. El giggled, and so did Lucas. 
Erica shot Mike a wry smirk. “Easy now, cowboy.”
“Bet you made me look like a total loser,” Mike snickered. 
“I don’t have to draw you to make you look like that,” Eric’s said in the most sugary sweet, sarcastic voice.
“Okay snarkbutts, settle down,” Steve scolded lightly in a groggy voice, no heat behind it. “Will has the floor. William: proceed.”
Will saluted him. “Alright. Count of 3.”
“Please tell me you gave me teeth,” Dustin mumbled lowly to El.
“One…”
El shrugged. “I dunno.”
Dustin narrowed his eyes. 
“Two…”
Steve gave you a coy look, asking in the lowest of mumbles, “How big’s my hair?” 
You grinned like a devil, your voice lower. “Not as big as your other best trait.”
Steve lifted a very cocky eyebrow with a deepening grin.
“Three!”
Everyone turned their papers around, and a soft silence fell over you all minus a few little reactive intakes of breath.
Dustin had drawn El with a million eggo waffles in the sky around her. She looked like the most adorable cartoon character, with anime eyes and full cheeks. Her hair was shorter, the way she’d looked back in ‘83 whenever she’d returned. But it wasn’t slicked back. It was free, curly and a little wild. Her smile was innocent and childlike, and there was a policeman in the back waving. Hopper. 
El had drawn Dustin with his signature cap and his big toothy grin — which made him beam, because she did give him teeth in the drawing after all. And in this drawing, there were bubble boxes above him that read all the quotes she associated with him, like Steve! and She’s our friend and she’s crazy! and Shit shit shit shit shit!
Mike had drawn Erica into a comic strip. He showed her as just a wee tike, then at Scoops Ahoy with an ice cream cone, then playing DND. The last image of the strip showed her with her arms crossed and a triumphant smile, with a banner behind her that read Welcome to the Party.  (…as Erica looked at it, she felt the most unfamiliar warmth seep into her bones and the joyful sting behind her eyes sent her into pure shock.)
Erica had drawn Mike on his bike, riding through the neighbor with his backpack and a flashlight. His dark hair blew in the wind, and there was a thought bubble above him with little heads that resembled all of his best friends.  Above him and the thought was a quote: “Mike Wheeler: nerd, snark machine and superhero to all.”  (…Mike felt so emo, he didn’t know what to do with it.)
You had drawn Steve in a very chic sort of hot anime-like way.  It honestly looked like an actual character that existed in an anime universe.  In the drawing, Steve held his nail bat in one hand and a McDonald’s happy meal in the other.  He didn’t quite understand that part at first — until he spotted behind him, there was a Winnebago.  Six familiar faces, very stick-figure-esque, stood there waving.  You also stood there, with a quote above your head: “six-piece nuggets, coming right up.”  Steve breathed the fondest of chuckles as he took it all in, wanting to laugh and smile and cry and tackle you with his kids all at the same time.
Steve’s drawing of you was more adorable than you ever thought him capable of drawing.  You were the cutest little cartoon, backpack over your shoulder with combat boots — but you were wearing the most beautiful dress.  It was yellow, which complimented the happy blue sky behind you.  Yours and Steve's favorite colors combined.  There was a big house behind you, with seven other stick figures that looked an awful lot like Steve and your six nuggets.  And right next to you, there was a dictionary-esque definition of you:
BAUMAN (Pronounced bow•men)
A professional love-life ruiner; cute but psycho; hardcore but soft; too smart for her own good; humor darker than the dark espresso she drinks straight, because she’s a sociopath; also hotter than said cup of coffee; terrifyingly beautiful from the inside out; my mortal enemy turned favorite person; the girl who makes everything make sense; someone I can’t fathom living without, and can’t believe I ever thought I could; the love of my life, in this one and the next and so on, so long as she’ll have me.
You had never felt so full in your entire life, and neither had Steve. The two of you just stared at each other’s drawings. Grinning, glassy-eyed, chuckling, aching, filled with every ounce of joy and every ounce dread — all at once.  Neither of you could speak, but neither of you had to. Your eyes, along with his, spoke volumes. They said everything there was to say, just as much as your sketches did.
Lucas had drawn Will in a wizard’s outfit.  He held a tall, majestic scepter — with a large hat on top of his head.  Surrounding him was a large swirl of colors, whimsical and light, painting a galaxy of sorts.  And in this galaxy, there were little floating stick figures with all his friends’ names above them.  Will was smiling in the drawing, with his hands in the air and on top of the world.  Literally, because in the picture he was standing on top of a globe.
As for Will...he had drawn Lucas at a basketball game. He was scoring the winning basket, and an entire crowd cheered behind him.  All of you were there.  Will was there, next to all his friends.  You and Steve were next to each other, along with his mom, Jonathan, Nancy, Argyle, Eddie, Robin and Hopper.  Even your Uncle Murray.  
And Max…that’s where Will’s drawing got unique. 
She was piggybacking Lucas, as he jumped and shot the winning score of the game, her laugh radiating through all the pens and crayons and markers that Will had used to sketch her.  She was alive, as were the rest of you.  Very much alive.
Just as you all were right now, inside one of Steve Harrington’s many bedrooms in his big house with no parents.  
No matter what doom was swiftly approaching — no matter what monsters were looming underneath the surface, and already roaming the real world — you all were together.  You had each other.
You always will.
***
Late morning upstairs has been kind to you.  It's been light.  Hopeful. 
There’s something about walking downstairs that makes the energy shift.  It sends an odd sort of chill up your spine, despite Steve’s arm draped securely over your shoulders as you wear one of his large gray hoodies with your bad arm in a sling.  You feel a certain pang in your chest as the kids follow you all down into the kitchen…but this time, it’s not because of your heart arrhythmia.
As Hopper and Joyce smile at you all in the kitchen, greeting you warmly and having prepared a table full of pancakes that had smiley faces decorated with whipped cream and chocolate chips and strawberries on top — something about the scene frowns at you.  A deep frown that you’ve seen on everyone’s faces whenever there is bad news waiting to be shared.
Your uncle is coming over to hand you a hot cup of decaf coffee, winking at you and Steve as he gives him a tight shoulder squeeze.  He’s moving past you both towards the man named Dimitri, who is walking in from the living room.  Murray brings him over to introduce you.
“Dimitri, this is my niece,” Murray grins.
You shake his hand firmly with your good arm, smiling gratefully.  “Heard a lot about you.”
“You as well,” the man says with a genuine smile, kind vibrant eyes and a thick Russian accent.  He’s definitely seen some shit.
“And this is Steve,” Murray gestures, a bit of a coy glint in his eye.  “Her boyfriend.”
Steve blushes, a soft smile gracing his features and shining through his eyes.  He wholeheartedly adores being called that out loud for the very first time: your boyfriend.
Your uneven heart skips several more beats, which typically would raise a lot of concern — but at the moment, you’re too fucking happy to care or pay it any mind.  You watch Steve flash his signature charming smile and reach out to firmly shake hands with Dimitri, who is looking back at your handsome boy with the widest grin.  The masculine exchange of lighthearted friendly words between the two men makes your stomach dance for some reason, especially as your uncle chuckles along with them.  
This is completely uncharted territory for you. Nothing about this moment is familiar.  But you could really get used to it.  It’s new.  And you adore it.
Dimitri meets the kids, who all take to him very well.  Especially El, who seems to already be familiar with him.  Likely because of Hopper.  Jonathan and Argyle are being introduced to him by Joyce, while Eddie is rounding the corner with a big stretch and yawn.  Steve shoots him a smirk as the metalhead makes his way over for a big ole bro hug, whispering something to him that makes Steve snort while Eddie grins like a devil.  Steve swats at him playfully, successfully smacking him as Robin walks in with Nancy close behind.  Steve’s quirky platonic soulmate makes her way over to you with a warm smile, swinging an arm over your shoulders so that she’s nearly headlocking you in a hug.  She’s a bit taller than you, by just a couple inches, so it gives her some upper hand.  You’re chuckling lightly, nose scrunched and tightly winding your good arm around Robin’s waist as you smile back at Nancy.  Her eyes are still sad, a bit lost.  But there’s no animosity there, at least not that you see.  She looks at you shyly, timidly…but with utter kindness.
Unbeknownst to you — Robin had suggested to Nancy that she stay with her last night in Steve’s room.  For Nancy, that had been…hard.  Necessary, but hard.  For multiple reasons.  For one thing — the last time she’d slept in Steve’s room, she had been his girlfriend. Being asleep in there 2 years later without him, now as his ex, brought back a flood of memories — bittersweet and haunting.  Being in his bed, twisted up in his sheets, felt wrong.  But she just couldn’t bring herself to sleep next to Jonathan that night.  Not yet.  Not after everything that had unfolded.  So Robin had stayed up talking with her, having a heavy heart to heart.  But it turned out to be exactly what Nancy needed.  Just what the doctor ordered.  Robin Buckley had unintentionally become a nurse of sorts over the last several months, and maybe even somewhat of a therapist.  Although — Argyle sort of had her beat in that department earlier that afternoon.  But he was the much simpler kind.  Whereas Robin got deep, given her innate gift at rambling until you were given no choice but to cut her off because your most honest thoughts were yanked out of you as you were made to listen to her ranting.  Nancy had cried some more, but she’d also laughed.  A comforting mixture of both smiles and frowns were shared between the two unlikely friends.  Robin wasn’t Barb, nor would any other girl be that kind of friend to Nancy.  Robin was very different from Barb.  However, her heart was just as loving.  She loved hard, and it showed.  She let Nancy pour her heart out, pouring some of her own out in return.  And somehow…somehow…it brought Nancy some newfound peace and understanding.
So as she looked at you now, having seen you come downstairs with Steve and the kids — now introducing yourselves to the new Russian house guest, and sharing a special connection with Eddie and Robin in a way that only settled couples so effortlessly did — Nancy could see something in the two of you that she’d not known Steve capable of being while she in a relationship with him.  And while she selfishly ached for her younger self who’d missed out on having that with him (and sometimes still found herself pining after), she selflessly began to feel happy for Steve.  And she even began to feel some happiness for you.  Not completely.  Not yet.  She couldn’t quite commit to making full peace with it all, given that healing takes time.  A very long time.  But as time continued to pass, which Nancy hoped you all would still be granted given the circumstances of the crumbling world, she knew that she would eventually get there.  
Murray and Dimitri were saying something funny, making Hopper and Joyce share a hearty laugh with the two of them while the kids were asking the new gentleman a million questions.  Steve made his way over to you and Robin, hugging you both — and Eddie threw his arms around all of you, resulting in fond groans and grunts from you all along with big smiles.
Nancy and Jonathan made unintentional eye contact as this happened, but Dustin shouting GROUP HUG! snapped their focus away again. The boys all bear hugged you guys while El and Erica were already pouring syrup onto their pancakes.
Eventually, you all sat down to enjoy a feast.  And while it tasted so deliciously sweet…the bitter aftertaste stemmed from looming doom that creeped just beneath the surface of your feet.  The energy shift was still felt, and despite the warmth of homemade pancakes and Steve’s hand on your thigh…your blood ran cold.
***
It was the early afternoon that finally unveiled the darker energy shift you had all been sensing since that morning, after you left the comforting quarters of your little family sleepover.
Everyone was now seated in the living room now — the way you always were, when it was time for you all to have a group meeting and listen to Hopper go over a plan of sorts or give a rundown to the household.  Except this time, Dimitri was here along with Dr. Owens.  It wasn’t like all the other times.  This was different.  Very different.
This one scared you.
Maybe they all should’ve. All these talks that centered around the end of the world. All these household meetings about the impending doom that came with said end-of-the-world. But somehow, you’d grown accustomed to them.  Comfortable.  It meant you were all still alive and that you all had something worth fighting for. And it had always meant there would be another meeting.
But there was an unsettling sort of feeling of finality to this meeting that set it apart from all the others.  And as Hopper stood with both Joyce and your uncle Murray…you felt goosebumps scatter up and down your arms and legs, regardless of Steve’s warm oversized hoodie and your leggings and socks.  Their faces were somber, a bit grim.  Murray kept his arms tightly crossed while Joyce fiddled nervously with her hands.  Even Hopper, ever the strong and firm type, looked nervous.  Maybe even afraid. 
They spoke all slowly, taking their time with why everyone was there — why Dimitri was now in the picture along with Dr. Owens — and what all needed to be discussed.  And the longer they spoke, the thicker the air got.  Tension spread around the room.  It was especially evident as none of the kids were making a sound.  They hadn’t uttered a single word.  Not one of them.  The adults had the floor, and when they asked Dimitri to stand with them, you all knew this was going to go in a bad direction.
So when they all told you the plan, looping Dr. Owens into the picture and why he not only was here for this talk — but here to stay — the gravity of the current situation landed.
You all felt your souls plummet to the deepest depths of your stomachs with a hard thud, as Hopper revealed two large whiteboards.  They both had entirely different detailed layouts…and beside each one, there were two separate lists of names.
One list of names would be at the frontlines.  The people who would be diving head first into the upside down and all of its perils. 
One list of names would be hiding out here.  The people who would maintain home base, helping operate things from the other side in the real world, while risking the chance of being found, caught and killed.
Both sides were at risk.  Both teams could die.  Both groups might not ever live to see another day, or each other, ever again.
As Steve stares at your name, along with the names of all of his kids aside from El, on the opposite whiteboard from his own name…he feels bile rising in his throat.  His stomach twists into knots, deeply tangled with unbearable anxiety and anguish.  His mind races, but his lips don’t move.  Fear paralyzes him, rendering him speechless as the adults keep talking and gesturing to the boards.  The castle on a cloud that his dreams have just began to build for the two of you, walls high and protecting you both along with his kids — his family — was drifting away from him.  And all he could do was watch it drifting further and further away, into the void, as he stared into space.
You felt his grasp on you instinctively tighten as his muscles stiffened.  Steve was rigid against your back, and you were grateful that he couldn’t see your face right now.  You were sitting between his legs on the longest part of his couch, facing the same direction as you took in the whiteboards while absorbing all the information that was being relayed to the group.  With a harsh swallow, you risked peeking at everyone else’s reactions — quickly scanning the room with your eyes.
Mike’s usually sour expression looked far more sad than it usually did.  He only ever looked like that when El was in danger, or things were spiraling out of control.  He sat on top of the coffee table with his elbows in his lap, crouched forward and staring a hole into one of the whiteboards.  Dustin’s mouth was agape, and his unusual silence was loud.  He hadn’t said a word from where he sat on the couch next to Erica.  Will sat on the other side of Jonathan, brow furrowed and heart blue.  He knew the risks being taken, and it hurt his soul seeing that he would be apart from his mom and brother.  He felt as though he always had been, ever since this all began, and it seemed to be a never ending circumstance.  Lucas was taking it all in from his seat on the leg of the couch, hands wrung and expression reserved — but defeated.  He’d really grown into a young man this past year, and he’d been taking so much in stride.  But even so, he looked conflicted.  Really conflicted.  
After taking in the kids’ reactions, your eyes swept over to Robin and Eddie.  She was seated in the giant loveseat, per usual, with Eddie perched on the arm of it.  You narrowed your eyes as you caught sight of Robin fiddling her thumbs, eyes darting up and down from her fingers to the adults with the whiteboards.  Eddie was bouncing his knee anxiously, nibbling at his fingernails — which were already bitten to stubs.  While the two of them looked to be taking this hard, the way that the rest of you were…they also seemed to be absorbing it a bit differently.  As if maybe they had a hunch about it already…
It wasn’t until Erica stood up to sit by Lucas with zero prompt that you felt slightly suspicious.  Because as she did, Robin shot a very quick tight-lipped smile in Erica’s direction with eyes that radiated sympathy.  Did they know this was coming?  Is that why Erica had come upstairs with the cookies and milk later than the rest of the kids?
You sighed through your nose, focusing back on Hopper as he gestured for Dr. Owens to stand up with them.  The older man made his way to the center of the tense room, hands dug deeply into his pockets and wearing a very sympathetic smile.
“I’m really grateful you all have put a lot of faith in me, despite everything,” he said humbly.  “Truthfully, it’s not owed.  I know that.  Still…I promise you’re in good hands with me.  Not those guys out there.  Hence why I’m here.  And I know you’d have already figured out by now if I was still working for that side of things.  Between El and Will, and all of you crazy smart folks, I’m outnumbered.”
He added a light chuckle at the end that nobody returned.  Dr. Owens sighed, taking no offense.  He knew this was not going to be taken well.
“I’m in this fight with you,” he said, stronger than how he spoke before.  There was conviction in his tone that he never really used, and it only heightened just how severe things currently were.  “If it were up to me?  None of you would be out there.  I’d be out there on the frontlines.  But…given Max’s comatose state, and Bauman’s heart condition, I know I’m needed here.  Which is just as big a risk that’s being taken out on the battlefield, because we’re staying in Hawkins as the evacuation notice and mandate goes into effect.  The city will be swarmed with government officials who are all behind this.  We’ll be surrounded from all angles.  No one is safe.”
You’re pretty sure that Steve had stopped breathing at this point, and the veins that prominently stuck out from his arms tightly wound around you made your throat close up.  
“I’ll be here to monitor Max, along with Bauman.  I’ve got plenty of medication to help steady the heart arrhythmia, and anything vital needed for a medical emergency — on anyone’s behalf, not just Bauman’s and Mayfield’s.”
“But…what happens if…”
A tight voice made everyone’s heads whip in its direction.  It was Dustin speaking, eyes wide with fear.  He wasn't being his usual cocky, overly confident self.  He looked and sounded genuinely fearful.
“…what happens if we’re caught?  What do we do?  Where do we go?”
Murray sighs, stepping forward.  “We’ve thought about that.  Right now, there’s only 2 options.  But they’re solid.  The best we’ve got right now.  One more than the other.  See, look —”
Murray went into detail about an abort-mission plan, but it sounded distorted in your ears as the gravity of the situation weighed down on top of your shoulders: you were all splitting up.  And this time might be the last time.
At some point, Mike had started to finally come to life.  His snark was returning, but even he wavered and the fear in his voice wasn’t concealed.  Hopper and El had to level with him, which only flustered Mike and caused him to stutter.  They had him beat, and he knew it.  He wanted to storm off, but Erica had told him to sit his ass down and listen.  It was so unexpected that he did as she said.  But your own brain was playing it all in slow motion.  As Will began asking questions with Dustin, you could see how Lucas had looked like he wanted to ask Erica if she might have already known something — but he didn’t.  Dr. Owens was saying something about Will being tied to the other side of things and being the assigned “El” of their group opposite of her, which fired up Mike as he demanded to know why the hell that required him to be out of the group heading to the frontlines alongside his girlfriend.  Before Hopper could even respond, Eddie was jumping into action along with Jonathan — coming to the retired cop’s defense.  That only bewildered Mike more, which fueled Dustin’s confusion into high gear as he made arguments alongside Mike.  Lucas had thrown his voice into the mix, but when Erica’s was louder — telling them all to listen, for the love of god listen, and Lucas stared at her in silent bemusement.  Will was weakly pleading with them all to please calm down, along with Joyce, who shot Argyle (of all people) a desperate look, and he made his way over to sit down next to Will and tell him it was going to be alright.
“NOTHING ABOUT THIS IS ALRIGHT,” Mike cried, angry and sad and scared in the way a child made to grow up too soon has every right to be.
“Mike, please,” Nancy’s voice trembled, her blue eyes glassy.
“Nancy, this isn’t okay!!!” Mike wailed.
“M-Mike,” Nancy stammered, her own emotions giving her a shake she couldn’t stop.  “Just l-listen to me…”
“No, you never listen to me!!!” Mike bawled.  “Never!!!”
“Hey hey, Wheeler, hey.”  
Steve finally found his voice as he reluctantly made his way to stand up away from you and approach his kid that was having an absolute breakdown.  Mike was still wailing, but as Steve approached with an unwavering look in his eye — baby Wheeler allowed for the group's assigned babysitter to actually place his hands on his shoulders and try to level with him.  Mike’s face crumbled, his words not making any sense the more he stumbled over them.  All that could be made out was something he was trying to say towards El — something about why and how could you and tell them I’m coming — which made Steve get a firm grip on his shoulders as he told him not to blame her for this.  After all, Steve had all the experience in the world as far as wrongfully placing blame on someone else was concerned…and it made your entire body ache as you watched him soothe Mike, who just bawled and mumbled nonsense in his hold.
El began to cry, too, leaning into Hopper — whose bottom lip trembled.  He bit down on it hard and willed it to stop, his eyes overwhelmed with everything that was unraveling before his eyes. 
Dustin was going back and forth with Erica, but he sounded so pitiful it made your uneven heart crack.  He kept looking over at Steve, begging him to understand.  Please Steve, please, let me go with you.  Eddie moved to immediately hold him, crushing him in more of a death grip than a hug.  The metalhead mumbled into his curly hair — not this time, kiddo, not this time.  Robin had a hand clamped over her mouth, emotions taking over as she barely managed to bite them back.
You stood up instantly, moving to hold Buckley.  She didn’t hesitate to make room for you on the seat, letting you take her in your arms as she shook like a leaf.  You gently swayed her side to side with you, murmuring quiet little words that were meant to be comforting — knowing they weren’t, but offering them anyway.
Your eyes met Jonathan’s across the room as he swayed with Will as well.  His pupils were blown, consumed with dread and drowning in pure misery, and you knew that yours weren’t much different.
Mike had buried his face into Steve’s chest at this point, and it made Nancy cry into her own palms as she curled in on herself.  
“I can’t do this,” she whispered, voice cracking at the end.  She looked at Hopper and your uncle, eyes guilty and full of shame.  “I - I’m sorry.”
Before you could even process what just happened, Nancy was barreling up the stairs.  Jonathan watched her go, panicking.  He looked at Will, then at you — eyes pleading.  You didn’t even let a second pass before you’d squeezed Robin to signal her, standing up to bring her over to where Will was seated.  You took Jonathan’s place as he went after Nancy, holding him tight as Robin leaned against you on your opposite side.  Argyle kept a kind hand on Will’s shoulder, still sitting to the other of him.  
“Steve, please, you die I die, remember?”
Dustin’s whimpered words had to have been the saddest plea you’d ever heard in your life.  Steve almost broke but before he could he flung an arm to sweep Dustin into his hold, as baby Wheeler kept bawling into his chest.  He held them both steady, letting them fall apart in his protective arms and doing everything in his power not to break down with them.  He couldn’t.  If he did, he’d failed them.  But to Steve’s dismay…he did anyway.  He ducked his head down, shaking against the two of his kids, letting himself silently weep with them.  For them. 
Lucas looked utterly heartbroken, which Erica noticed.  The youngest Sinclair cast aside all her pride, looking at her older brother with the most sympathy and love she could have towards anyone in this world, and she threw her arms around him.  He only let it shock him for a second before he held her back, a grateful silence falling over them both.  
You felt tears of your own begin to brim your eyes, but before letting them fall you looked up towards the adults…seeing your uncle first.  Murray looked back at you with every ounce of empathy and solace that could be found inside his dark soul. 
You gave him a soft nod, silently communicating with him.  I understand.  I’m sorry you had to deliver this news, but I’m here and I understand. 
And he returned the soft nod, lips pressed into a thin line but communicating back through eye contact and body language.  I love you and I hate this.  But I’ve got you.
Dimitri stood next to him, eyes somber and downcast.  He was new to the picture, but having seen the other side of things and just how bad a toll this has clearly taken on you all — he mourned for everyone’s pain. 
Dr. Owens had to sit down, unable to speak and wringing his hands.  
Hopper and Joyce held each other, along with El.  They looked at each other, devastated but steadfast.  
This plan was not open for discussion.  
This plan was not open for debate.  
This plan was final.
And so you let the tears crawl over the edges of your eyes, feeling them skate down your cheeks as you clung to Will and Robin and felt the world sit on top of your shoulders.
***
-- so as you can see, shit's getting intense. the gut-wrenching angst approaching has me overwhelmed but I'm so sickeningly happy about it. suffice it to say, Steve & Bauman are my Roman Empire and they are endgame. so if that gives you any sort of hope, given the inevitable doom that is in store for them and everyone else involved...then yay.
<3 this story forever lives on. forever and ever amen. - misha
TAGLIST (ILYSM) If I forgot you or you wanna be added, lmk :)
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Hi Kat! I’m in loooove with Elementary. Do you think perhaps you could write about Sarah/ reader bonding where reader helps her with periods, or something like that, where Joel maybe feels a little out of depth (he’d try his best, i think)? I’m sorry if i’m overstepping!! It’s just a thought I had, feel free to disregard, obviously. Love all of your work!
Out of My Depth
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pairing: pre-outbreak!joel miller x sarah’s teacher!reader
rating: M (talks of periods, joel being a clueless man who means well, fluff city basically)
wc: 1.8k
series masterlist
“Hey, is everything okay?” You met Joel at the front door of his home, a frantic look of concern on your face as you searched his. He’d called you up just a little bit ago and asked you to come over because there was an emergency with Sarah, and without asking any questions, you got in your car and drove over. “Where’s Sarah? Is she—“
“Calm down, baby,” he breathed out a chuckle. “Sarah’s alright, she just…well, she…started her you know what for the first time, and I—“ Joel was interrupted by the sound of your laughter, his eyes fixed on you as you doubled over, cackling at the fact that at his ripe age of 34 years old, he couldn’t utter the word “period”. “Alright, ha-ha. Go on and laugh at me, but I didn’t know what to do! I’m out of my depth here.”
“Oh, baby,” you cooed, a grin still on your face as you cupped his cheek. “Where is she?”
“Upstairs in the shower. Didn’t know what else to do so I told her to go have a hot shower,” he chuckled, sheepish about his lack of knowledge on this front.
“Do you have any pads? Tampons? Anything?” you asked. Joel shook his head and sighed.
“I thought we had a few more years until we had to worry about all this,” he admitted, scratching his neck. “Gimme a list of what I need to go pick up and I’ll run down to the drugstore.”
“Okay,” you smiled, endeared by his determination.
Joel walked you inside the house and grabbed a piece of paper and a pen from his desk before joining you at the dining table. You had to giggle at his eagerness, his eyes wide as he looked to you for guidance. Pushing his hair back, you gave him a kiss on the forehead before beginning to list off the basics: pads for the daytime, maxi-pads for the evening, a box of regular tampons in case she wanted to try that out, some midol, a heating pad, and most importantly, chocolate.
“Jesus,” he whistled at the list, shaking his head. “Like preppin’ for a damn surgery.”
“Yeah, it’s not a fun time,” you chuckled. “Alright, you go out and I’ll wait for Sarah to get out of the shower. Think we gotta go over a few things that I’m sure neither of you want to go over together.”
“Thank you,” he whispered, leaning in to kiss you deeply. “Seriously. You didn’t have to do this.”
“I love you and I love her,” you assured. “It’s no problem at all. I know I’ll never replace her mom and I would never want to. But if I can offer my help and love, I want to, as long as both of you will have me.”
“I’m not plannin’ on shooin’ you off anytime soon,” he smirked, pulling you close for another kiss. “I love you.”
“I love you, too. Now go on, you’ve got a hefty shopping list to get through.”
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With Joel out of the house, you waited patiently for Sarah to make her way out of the shower by sitting across the hall in Joel’s bedroom. You managed to find a spare pad in your car’s glovebox, and held the plastic-wrapped square in your hand, ready to hand it over as soon as she emerged.
“Dad?” she called from her bedroom and you quickly stood up and walked into the hall.
“Hey, your dad went out to buy some stuff for you,” you called into her room. The door was cracked open but you didn’t want to intrude. “I have a pad here for you, though.”
“Thanks,” she gave you a meek smile as she opened the door. “How do I…use it?”
“It’s pretty uncomplicated. Just take it out of the wrapper and put the sticky side down on your underwear. You’ll get the hang of it the longer you use ‘em.” You handed the pad over and Sarah accepted it, flipping it around in her hand. “I’ll be downstairs. Have you eaten?”
“No, dad was gonna cook but then—“ she looked embarrassed. “Then it happened.”
“No worries,” you assured. “I’ll call in a pizza. How do you want it?”
“Pepperoni with extra cheese,” she was quick to answer, making you chuckle. “Oh, and dad likes his with jalapeños.”
“Good to know,” you made a mental note of Joel’s pizza order. “I’ll do half with jalapeños.”
“Thanks,” she spoke sincerely. “For all of this.”
“Trust me, I get how scary this is,” you gestured to the pad. “And I know it’s not the easiest thing to talk about with your dad, so, if you have any questions, I’m happy to answer them.”
“Oh, I only have about a thousand, starting with, ‘Is it always so bloody?’” You laughed and scrunched your face up in empathetic disgust.
“Unfortunately, yeah. But you’ll get better about handling it as you go,” you eased her worry. “How about you and I go through some more of these questions downstairs while we wait for your dad?”
“I’d appreciate that,” she smiled.
Downstairs, you called up the pizza place that Joel had a magnet menu from stuck into his fridge, throwing in one of their cookie-pie desserts knowing that Sarah would appreciate it. Sarah joined you on the sofa a few minutes later, dressed in her pajamas and a throw blanket wrapped around her shoulders.
“So, how long does this last?” she asked over the quiet hum of a Fresh Prince of Bel Air rerun.
“About a week. Some girls are blessed and only have to deal with a couple days of this, but it lasts about seven days for me,” you replied. “It also changes the longer you have it. Your period is gonna be really unpredictable for the first few months because your body is still adjusting to all these new hormones and stuff. Make sure you always keep a pad or two on you these next few months because it might strike whenever.”
“God,” she groaned. “I wish I was a boy.”
“That would be easier,” you agreed.
“You should’ve seen my dad’s face when I stood up and there was blood on my jeans,” she chuckled, her simples reminding you of her father. “I think he almost had a heart attack.”
“Poor guy,” you laughed. “When he called me up, he was so scared. I think he thought he had way more time to come to grips with the fact that you’re getting older.”
“If getting older means all this, I’m not sure I want to,” she groaned.
“Amen, sister.”
Joel’s key turning the lock of the front door caught both of your attention, your heads turning in his direction as he stepped inside the house. He eyed both of you hesitantly before cracking a sheepish smile.
“Hey,” he greeted. “Everything…okay?”
“Yeah, just giving her the run down,” you replied with a smile. Joel nodded and looked to Sarah as he made his way over to the sofa, sitting down in the space between the two of you.
“Alright,” he started, opening one of the plastic shopping bags he’d carried inside. “Got everything on the list except for a heating pad. We’ll have to get that in the mornin’.”
“Cool,” she gave her dad a smile and lowered her eyes to the shopping bag.
“Alright, so,” he looked to you for help as he started to go through what he bought. “Got some different pads, I don’t know—“
“These are good for daytime,” you aided his explaining, pointing at the package of smaller pads he held up. “Less bulky so you’ll feel better about walking around in them.”
“Okay,” she nodded and accepted the pack into her lap. Joel lifted another pack labeled as ‘overnight’.
“These are better for sleeping. They’re longer and hold more blood.” Both of them shuddered at the word as it left your lips, making you chuckle. “Everybody bleeds,” you reminded. “Women just bleed more often.”
“You’re right,” Joel gathered his composure and tried to be an adult about the situation, though you could clearly see his head spinning over the fact that his baby girl was growing up. “I also got you some…tampons,” he forced the word out of his mouth like it tasted bitterly. “In case—“
“I think I’m good,” she chuckled.
“Respect,” you nodded, offering her an amused smile.
“This is some medicine for your cramps and stuff,” Joel handed her the box of Midol and you noticed his hand was shaking. “Also got you this,” he handed her a bag of assorted chocolate candies, Sarah’s eyes lighting up at the sight.
“I get chocolate?” she beamed, earning a laugh from both of you.
“Yep,” he nodded, eyes flickering to yours. “Oh, there’s one more thing, but it’s in the truck. Gimme a minute.”
Joel got up and walked back outside while Sarah got up to put her new things away upstairs, leaving you alone on the sofa.
When he returned, he carried a toddler-sized teddy bear in one hand and two bouquets of brightly colored carnations in the other.
“Where’s baby girl?” he asked, looking boyish with his smile.
“Upstairs,” you smirked before tipping your head towards the flowers. “Nice touch.”
“Glad you thought so,” he approached you on the couch and plopped down beside you, setting the bear and one of the bouquets in Sarah’s seat before handing you the other. “These are for you.”
“Baby,” you cooed, a touched frown on your face as you accepted the flowers, lifting them to your nose. “What’s this for?”
“For being here,” he replied, soft and sweet. “But mostly just because I love you.”
“Don’t make me cry,” you ordered, playfully stern. Leaning over, you pressed your lips to his in a quick but deep kiss. “I love you.”
“Are those for me?” Sarah beamed as she walked into the room, pointing at the bear and flowers. Joel nodded and patted the seat beside him, welcoming his daughter into his side. “Thanks, dad.”
“No problem, baby girl,” he leaned over and placed a kiss on her forehead, his arm draping over her shoulder to pull her into his side. “How ‘bout a movie?”
“Sounds good,” Sarah replied. “Oh, when does the pizza get here?”
“Pizza?” Joel turned to you with eager interest.
“With jálepeños and extra cheese,” you noted, delighting in the way his smile turned into a grin.
Joel shook his head at you as though he was amazed by you and reached over to lace his fingers with yours, mouthing a sinful promise for the evening to come. But for now, the three of you sat there on the couch, curled up, bellies full of pizza and sweets, all content with the family you’d become seemingly overnight.
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m1ssunderstanding · 4 months
Text
Get Back Rewatch 55 Years On: Day 17
George is so sweet to put so much effort into helping Ringo write his song and to not ask for any kind of writing credit. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, right? But also, I’d do that for Ringo too if I were him. Ringo deserves it for everything he’s given to that band and the little credit he’s received. 
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“What am I playing, Richie?” “You’ll be on drooms.” If the Beatles know how to do one thing, it’s be cute. 
John, stop talking about Paul’s strong arms, you're embarrassing yourself. 
I do have to just include this here. From my Get Back book. I never heard, “was it sexually oriented?” on the nagra reels, but apparently that’s what Peter Jackson’s cleaned-up version gave him, and again, he was like, “hmm. Too gay.” 
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He’s known Heather for how long? Less than a year, right? But if somebody had showed me just this footage and told me he’d raised her from a newborn, I would not blink an eye. That kind of tired but fond interaction is exactly how a dad plays with his kid. And she’s climbing all over him and bossing him around like he’s never not been in her life. It’s beautiful. 
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And John, with his “are you going to eat them?” is the perfect sort of bad-example favorite uncle. The kind that would check her out of school when she’s older and go get her ears pierced when her dad had said she was too young. 
Sorry, I promise I’m not just going to be thirsting over dad Paul this whole time. I have to just make one thing clear, and this is the only thing I’ll say on the subject and then I’m done. If a man is a 3 and a good dad, he’s a 10. Paul was already an 11, so I’m literally just done-for. Okay, I’ll shut up. 
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John and Paul doing their usual thing, only paying attention to each other. Talking about an Elvis gospel ending for Let it Be. George, smirking, stands up: and we’ll all kneel as you do it. If John had said it, Paul would be in stitches. But George said it, and he might as well have never opened his mouth for all the notice he gets. And it’s honestly heartbreaking, if you can take your eyes off of the insanity of John and Paul’s weird eye-contact, to watch George’s face go from excited at his own wit and hopeful for a laugh to just completely downcast. Twelve years of that. Twelve years. 
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Ringo, you’re an absolute saint. He’s being so sweet to Heather, even letting her mess with his symbols, and then Paul has the audacity to tell him to “keep it lighter.” Like. Paul. Do you think that maybe the fact that he’s got a five-year-old over there “helping” him might have anything to do with how the drums are coming out? Just a thought. Anyone else would at least have something to say about it. Ringo just sort of nods along but he looks SO tired.
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TFW you’re inspiring the next generation of women to be loud and free and take up space.
“Dig it” is actually insane to me. I know I’m crazy, but remember those twin dreams they had about buried treasure when they first met? “If you want it, you can dig it up.” ???
When George and Paul just jump into harmonizing together when they’re talking about The Long and Winding Road arrangement? Their voices are like magic together. I wish they would’ve had George sing that part in the final thing, actually.  
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girlboypersonthingy · 4 months
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omg i love your blog sm!! it’s been a while since ive been in the fandom and i didn’t think anyone wrote for vld anymore, ahhhh but i love the way you write!! you’re so so talented!! how do you think a love triangle sitch with keith and lance would play out? i love the both but UGHHHH THE DRAMA I LOVE IT😩😩
Oh my god thank you so much! I’m so flattered asfdafh 🥰🥹 I know the fandom is dead to most but not to all. I’m still here and voltron will always live on in my heart ❤️‍🔥 BRO THIS PROMPT??? PLZ ITS SO GOOD AAHHH ENJOY!
❤️Love Triangle💙
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Okay first of all, these two would try to win you over IN COMPLETELY OPPOSITE WAYS.
Lance is, of course, over the top and very romantic and kind of cliche but so considerate and thoughtful and sweet.
Keith will be more nonchalant and mysterious, trying to use his skills and talents to impress you. He’s the type to slowly win you over by being very genuine and honest.
It started when Lance threw a pick up line your way and not only was the line terrible…but you actually laughed at it. It brought some pink to your cheeks as well. They both noticed that.
Lance was very smug about the fact that he made you giggle and blush.
Keith was a little annoyed at first, thinking Lance was just being his usual obnoxious self. So Keith just kept trying to make moves on you in his own way.
One day, Lance walked into the training room to see you and Keith sitting beside each other on the floor, breathing heavily as if you’d just decided to take a break. He couldn’t really hear what Keith was saying but you looked very focused, very into the conversation and you two were sitting just a little bit too close for his liking.
Lance didn’t like the eyes you were making at the red paladin
But Keith sure did. He was so excited to be sitting so close to you.
Then it’s like the spider man meme of them pointing at each other like 😧👉🏻 👈🏻😮
“Wait! You like (Y/N)? No no no, you can’t! I like (Y/N)!”
“Well I liked them first!”
“No! No! Dibs!”
“Really? Dibs?” *eye roll*
For the next week, they’re both acting like goofballs around you.
It’s kind of hilarious and very entertaining for you because…you notice that they start adopting each other’s ways of flirting and dropping hints. They do a little swap.
It’s like they think the other person has a better chance with you so they try to switch it up and copy each other. Lance thinks Keith’s ‘mysterious bad boy’ persona is something you’re into. Keith thinks you find happiness in all the silly, goofy things Lance does. So they both try to switch it up in hopes of making you fall for them. Does that make sense?
Imagine Keith trying to use a pick up line on you and failing miserably. He’s probably sweating through his shirt and his mouth is dry bc he’s so close to you, he can smell your shampoo. He’d end up stuttering and then getting really pissed at himself for looking dumb in front of you. May go back to his room and pout if he felt things didn’t go well.
Now imagine Lance trying to be all soft spoken and mysterious, trying to act cool. Lance trying not to talk too much is the equivalent of him holding his breath. It’s only a matter of time before he breaks character and says some dumb, cheesy shit that has you rolling your eyes. He awkwardly shuffles away to his room and also pouts bc he feels like he’s just loud and annoying.
The boys got into a yelling match about it once. The pot just boiled over and all you could do was watch.
That was their very shitty, joint confession of their feelings for you- them screaming about who likes you more, who liked you first, who you’re more compatible with, ect ect blah blah blah
All right in front of you
And all the while, the whole team is so confused
Cue Allura and Hunk stepping in between them because both their faces are turning red from anger and jealousy.
Everyone just looks at Shiro like 👀
Shiro, the dad of the group: 🙄😤 “fine…”
Shiro sits them both down for a long chat and by the end of it, the boys have come to terms with the fact that they both like you and not only is it your choice who you’d want to be with, but there’s a lot of other things to be worried about rn. They shouldn’t, and they won’t, pressure you.
Buuttttt…they do keep up some of the same things they like to do with you.
Keith still trains with you often (and he really enjoys helping you with your stance/posture bc he gets to be touchy✨)
Lance still invites you into his room to play video games (and he always seems out of breath when you sit so close to him, your arm touching his)
They try their best to control their temper around you and they try not to be around when you’re with the other person. They don’t need to see you being all close and personal with someone who isn’t them. :,(
The boys just continue to be their normal selves with you. They figure you should get to know them, the real them, before you make any decisions.
Yes, they both like you.
Yes. They’re both very competitive and very jealous.
But they respect each other and they respect you.
And we are in the middle of an intergalactic war right now, this is not a real priority.
They’ll give you some time and a pace to think about it.
Now comment on this post and tell me who you’d choose 😈 I love them both so so much but Lance is my soulmate for sure
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imfinereallyy · 1 year
Text
@henderdads posted this about domestic fluff and I realize that I love this trope and I just don’t write enough of it, and I wanted to give her a little treat to read. Mostly because her tags when she reblogs on my post give me absolute joy, I laugh every time.
Two things might come as a surprise when getting to know Steve Harrington. The first being he didn’t actually like parties. He likes making other people feel good, wants to make them happy. Hence why for years, he lets Tommy and Carol wreak havoc on his house. It makes them happy and, for a short while, makes most of Hawkins High happy. Steve, in retrospect, has learned to regret this since he has now gained a reputation for being a party king, despite not throwing one in years, but he knows all too well how hard it is to let go of a high school reputation.
The second surprising fact is that Steve Harrington hated his birthday. Well, maybe hate wasn’t the right word, but he has incredibly low expectations for his birthday. Either everyone forgets his birthday, or somehow Steve is reminded that he is an inconvenience.
“Sorry sweetie, your dad has a business meeting that day.”
“Dude, I have a baseball game in that night could we do something another day?”
“I’m late! I know, we stayed up all night playing D&D. I even forgot to call Suzie!”
Steve isn’t necessarily hurt per se when these things happen. He knows that some people, more than others, are really trying. That it’s human to make mistakes. But Steve doesn’t like to get his hopes up; that’ll be much better than that.
There is also the more commonly now known fact that Steve doesn’t like being the center of attention. And birthdays come along with a lot of that. Sure, Steve wants someone to pay attention to him, really listen to what he has to say, but he has long since out grown the desperate need to have everyone look at him.
It is why it is such a surprise the upside down crew throws him a 24th birthday party.
Steve always thought something like this would upset him, but he is delightfully warm at the sight of all his friends, all of his family, inside Robin and Nancy's apartment screaming,
“Surprise, Dingus!”
Steve can’t believe she got everyone to say that.
After the shock of seeing them all packed like sardines wearing party hats, Steve can’t help but smile.
Eddie walks up to him, placing a hat on his head and a soft kiss on his cheek. “I tried to stop them,” Eddie whispers. “I know you don’t like parties, but they just wanted to show how much they love you. It was hard to say no.”
Steve turns to Eddie, a man who knows him inside and out and knows he can’t lie to him. “I thought I would hate this, but I don’t. It’s perfect.” He kisses Eddie on the lips, just as soft as the one before.
“Good, because I really didn’t try to stop them.” Eddie smiles into the kiss.
“Ew!”
“Gross!”
“Get a room!”
Various shouts across the room cause the couple to giggle and pull apart. Eddie flips them all off, “It’s been four years, assholes! Grow up.”
Eddie runs off to particularly chase Mike, who actually hasn’t said anything but did make a face, and Steve can’t help but be overwhelmed by joy.
🎉🦇🎉🦇
Hours later, after the cake has been cut and the presents have been shared, and his kiddos are definitely way too drunk, the party doesn’t show any signs of slowing down. And Steve, who is having fun but growing antsy since he slowed down on drinking years ago, isn’t quite sure what to do with himself.
He doesn’t want to ruin the fun or make anyone think he didn’t have a good time. This is one of the best birthdays, if not the best one, he’s ever had. But Steve is getting overwhelmed and worn out. He isn’t really tired, but being social has reached its capacity for the night.
Even so, he can’t help but laugh at Robin as she tells a story about the most recent disaster of her sign language class, where kids keep accidentally swearing instead of the proper words.
Eddie catches his eye across the room; he looks happy as he talks to Hop and Wayne. But even mid-conversation, across the sea of people, he tugs his helix piercing over his right ear twice.
It’s their signal for, “Do you want me to come over?”
Steve rubs the scar over his left eye twice, “Yes please.” It means.
Eddie excuses himself and makes his way to Steve. “Hey, baby.” He interrupts Robin mid-rant, who makes a sound of drunken protest. “Did we feed Mrs. Pierson’s cat today?”
Another signal, which translates, “Do you want to go home?”
And Steve knows he can just tell Eddie yes, and they can stay at the party, and Steve will have fun, and he’ll be happy, but it isn’t what he wants. What he wants is to be at home with their own cat Beelzebub, snuggled up in their bed. So Steve says, “Shit, I don’t think we did.” Yes, please. Let’s go home.
Eddie acts quickly. They make their rounds, say goodbyes, and make their excuses. Everyone lovingly pokes at their forgetfulness. The couple insists everyone stays and enjoys themselves. Steve thanks everyone with individual hugs.
Steve and Eddie hold pinkies the entire walk home, down the streets of Indianapolis. The dark night blanket of night, and the never-ending sound of the city, keeping them safe enough to risk the intertwined digits.
When they make it home, they say nothing. They unwind slowly. Sharing kisses, delicately take off each other's clothes, hum into each others mouths. There is nothing rushed, or rough; they have time now. There will be moments for that later.
And in their journey from the front door to the bed, Eddie kisses the place where Steve’s shoulder and neck meet. It’s his signal for “I love you.”
Later, when they are tangled up in the sheets, heavy breaths slowing down, Eddie’s arms wrapped around him, Steve leans up and kisses the tip of Eddie’s nose. It’s his signal for “I love you more.”
Eddie’s smile back says, “that just isn’t possible.”
“Thank you for today.” Steve finally speaks out loud, playing with Eddie’s fingers.
“Oh, it isn’t over yet, baby.” And Eddie jumps out of bed naked, running out of the room.
Steve can’t help but cackle at his boyfriend's antics. There is a sudden thump on the bed; Steve peeks down to see their cat making his home on the end of their bed like he knows they are finally done for the night. “Hey, bee.” Steve scratches him behind his ear, earning a resounding purr from him. A little to the left, it means.
Eddie comes back into the room and dives back into the bed, bouncing Beelzebub but not startlingly him enough to move. Steve supposes he’s used to his father's antics. “Okay, I would tell you to close your eyes, but I know you’re not going to listen, so I’m just going to hand them to you.”
Steve giggles and grabs the pieces of paper in his hands and his heart stops. “Eddie.”
“Steve.” Eddie’s grin is wide.
“These are three tickets to see Madonna.”
“Yup.” Eddie pops his ‘p’ clearly proud of himself. “One for you, one for Robs of course, and one for me.”
Steve whispers in awe, “But you hate Madonna.”
Eddie brushes the hair out of Steve’s face, “Please, no one can hate Madonna.” Eddie’s eyes turn soft, “Besides, you love her, and you love me. It only felt fair to have us both in the same place. And you’d worry the entire time if I wasn’t there.”
Steve throws his arms around Eddie, squeezing him tight. Hoping he can translate how much he loves this man through it. Steve loves making other people happy, but no one has loved making Steve happy, quite like Eddie. “I love you so much,” Steve says once he leans back.
Eddie kisses the place where his shoulder and his neck meet. I love you. Eddie kisses the tip of his nose. I love you more. Finally, he holds Steve’s face and says aloud,
“I love you too.”
***
Was this perhaps inspired by the fact I turn 24 in a week and a half? Maybeee. I’m a lot like Steve in this where I have such mixed feelings about my birthday. I’m feeling a lot of anxiety about it if I’m honest, and I don’t have high hopes.
Unlike me, I don’t have a partner like Eddie, but Steve deserves the world and I wanted him to have some loving and domestic fluff. The idea that these two have secret signals is an important headcannon to me, and I would love to see others take on it.
I hope @henderdads you enjoyed this if you made it this far. It was a lot of fun to write. :)
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yikesmary · 11 months
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omg for wonu’s birthday could i request like reader and his daughter trying to prepare a birthday surprise for him. like maybe they’re tryna set up dinner for him after practice or a breakfast in the morning
BIRTHDAY SURPRISE — jeon wonwoo x reader
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summary: where you and nari try to make breakfast and a cake before wonwoo wakes up… if only your daughter knew what the word “surprise” meant.
notes: the fact that i’m getting requests for dad!seventeen when i don’t want children LMAO. i’m not mad about it, i just think it’s funny irony. keep the requests coming though <3
this was supposed to be posted on wonwoo's birthday, but my keyboard likes not working so I had to write this in small sessions whenever my keyboard was cooperative with me, so sorry about posting late <3
join my taglist!
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“Not too fast on the stirring, Nari. The mix might spill over,” you told your daughter, watching as she tried to diligently stir the bowl that contained the homemade frosting mixture.
Your daughter hummed and stopped stirring to look at you, “Like this, mommy?”
You nodded and she smiled, her cheeks and forehead were somehow lightly covered in the mixture. Laughing, you grabbed a clean dishrag and wiped the mixture off, her face scrunching as you wiped.
“Do you think daddy will like this?” Nari asked.
“Of course he will! Especially since it’s coming from you!” You replied, kissing your daughter on the head.
“And it’s coming from you too!” She cheerfully exclaimed.
Unbeknownst to the two of you, Wonwoo was looking at the both of you with pride and adoration. He had awoken to an empty spot beside him in bed, and when he looked in Nari’s room, she was nowhere to be found either.
For a second, he thought of the worse, before a distinct noise coming from the kitchen capture his attention. Wonwoo tried his best to enter the kitchen as silently as he could, and that’s when he saw you and Nari.
Nari was the first one to stop Wonwoo, gasping and getting down from the little step stool that was for her; all the guys had gifted it to her and decorated it together, ‘Jeon Nari’ on it with the most cluttered, disorganized mess of stickers were on it, yet it was probably her most prized possession in the kitchen.
She practically jumped onto Wonwoo, who had fast enough reflexes and just knew she was going to do that. “HAPPY BIRTHDAY DADDY!” Nari yelled out, grabbing his face and squeezing. While she didn’t have the strength to hurt him, it looked painful with his glasses pressing against his temples.
You smiled at the sight and joined the father-daughter duo. “Happy Birthday, baby,” you greeted, kissing him on the lips.
“Daddy, we’re making you a surprise cake and breakfast!” your daughter exclaimed, clueless on the fact that the point of a surprise was to keep it a surprise.
Wonwoo laughed at her secret keeping and you couldn’t help but laugh as well. “It’s not so much of a secret now that you told him, sweetheart,” you cooed at Nari, pinching her chubby cheeks at how cute she was.
“What’s for breakfast—“
“Nope,” you cut him off and turned him and Nari away from the food, the only semblance of hope you had at keeping his birthday breakfast a secret.
“How about you and Nari go to the living room and finish one of your LEGO projects and I’ll finish up here and call you guys when I’m ready,” you directed.
Nari clapped at the mention of the LEGOs and Wonwoo said, “what if I help—“
“You can help me by playing with our daughter in the living room and leaving me to finish your food, birthday boy,” you told him.
Sighing, he finally listened and left the kitchen, making you smile in satisfaction.
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“Nari! Wonwoo! Breakfast’s ready!” You called out, placing the final plate on the table.
You heard two pairs of footsteps approach and saw that Nari ran in first, with Wonwoo lagging slightly behind. “I win!” Nari yelled out victoriously.
“You are so fast, Nari!” Wonwoo exclaimed exaggeratedly.
Once Nari was distracted, Wonwoo looked at you and whispered, “I totally let her win,”
“I don’t know, Nari was pretty fast…” you teased.
“So that’s how we’re going to play it, huh?” He challenged, and you widened your eyes, knowing what was going to happen.
Trying to get a head start, you tried running away but Wonwoo caught you, his arms around your waist and swinging you away from the door. Wonwoo then started tickling you and you squeaked and started laughing uncontrollably.
In the midst of your laughing, your daughter somehow joined in the mix, tickling you like her father was doing. “I surrender!” You tried saying, tapping Wonwoo on his knee, which instantly made him stop.
As you tried to catch your breath, Wonwoo carried Nari to a chair and began unfolding a napkin to put on her lap and another unfolded napkin around her neck. “Why do I have to do this?” she asked.
“Because I don’t want you getting your clothes dirty,” Wonwoo said.
“I see Uncle Gyu and Uncle Vernon do this sometimes,” Nari said.
“That’s because they both inhale their food,” he responded.
Once you were able to catch your breath, you sat on a dining room chair, exhausted.
You then grabbed Nari’s plate (smaller than yours and Wonwoo’s) and little portions of everything that was cooked. Then after making sure all of the food was in Nari-appropriate pieces, you gave it to her, along with kid-safe chopsticks.
Silence fell between the three of you, the only noise coming from the chewing and the occasional chopstick grazing the plate.
"What do you want to do for your birthday?" You asked, breaking the silence.
"I could go back to sleep right now and I'd be happy with what I've done for my birthday," Wonwoo smiled.
"Come on, there has to be something that you've always wanted to do for your birthday but never did,"
"Well, there is one thing,"
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"Hurry, Dad!" Nari squealed, jumping up and down out of excitement.
"Just give me a second, Nari," Wonwoo said, placing the pile of blankets on a nearby chair. He then grabbed one of the blankets and placed it on the formations of chairs, making a makeshift fort.
Nari ran into the space, and since she was very small in comparison to the space, there was enough space for her to run around. You then walked into the room, arms filled with various snacks that all of you liked.
Wonwoo walked towards you and grabbed some of the snacks in order to help you out, and then crouched down to walk into the fort.
"What movie should we watch first?"
"Mommy, can we please watch a Marvel movie?" Nari asked you, giving you the similar puppy-dog eyes Wonwoo seemed to give you whenever he wanted something.
"Are you sure, baby? Some Marvel movies are violent," Wonwoo asked, patting Nari's head.
"I can watch it! I'm a good girl," Nari promised.
"How about we watch Spider-Man: Into the Spider-verse?" You suggested, the movie was the closest thing to a compromise.
The father and daughter looked at each other before nodding in agreement.
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Light snores filled the room as you watched Wonwoo and Nari sleep, the movie only halfway before the both of them got sleepy. It seemed routine for them to sleep whenever there was a movie put on.
Knowing that the position they were in was going to give them a sore neck, you softly shook Wonwoo awake. His glasses were askew, but his eyes fluttered open and he looked confused before looking around and then finally seeing you.
"You guys fell asleep," you softly informed him.
He yawned but moved slowly since Nari was on him. Moving her so he can carry her comfortably, he stood up. You watched as he moved, and you assumed that he was going to Nari's room to put her on her bed.
When he came back, you already started on cleaning up the food and the fort. "How did you like your birthday?" You asked, turning to him.
He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you closer in order to give you a peck on the lips.
"It was the best birthday I've ever had,"
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taglist (if your name isn't gray, then it means I was unable to tag you): @belladaises @winterpaos @wonhuiful @minhui896 @baekhyunimochibbh @x-alightinthedark @whywontyousetfree @minghaossv @coffeesandrains @slaveofmydreams @bmkgemz @dandycharmer @outrologist @stagefrjghts @dahliatopia @exo-saranghajaaa @uhlatcha @watermelon-sugars-things @miniminimingi @venzline @kokorit0 @withloveyjh @mikopikotobiko @lockburn-castle @mrs-kamisato @userjunhuii @mypsychicpizzaworld @againwithwonu @violetvoo @maevadobreva @hyperhanie @soonyoungblr @miesieu @baekhyunstruly @ryusol @fuzzyblazeenemy @smileyneos @xuenihao @itsrachelsplace @yoonzinoooo @pepperonidk @jw-0717 @swinterr @jeonride @wonuumelody @dearxia @worldwidehoodrat @bemybabiibish @lacie220900
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its-time-to-write · 1 year
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PLEASE i am on my knees for jamie x reader where she’s just crying thinking about all the times he needed someone but no one was there.. and now everything is great, he’s grown and he has so much love and support and he has her but all she can do is sob because when you love someone you wish you were could be there to hold them even if they were 8 and their dad was a dick.. yknow??? AND he’s just holding her face, nodding and reassuring her he’s fine and he has so many people, especially her, and he’s lowkey choked up too
So. This is actually a mix of two writings. The first part is from your request, the second is something I wrote shortly after my very first post. I actually wrote it because I was processing some personal things, so… yeah. Here it is. Just be warned, it talks about abuse and stuff, Jamie’s dad shows up and is his regular, douchey self. If that’s upsetting for anyone, just be aware. If this needs more warnings, let me know.
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i don’t know how you keep smiling/i’m just choking almost constantly
“He what?” you whisper, tears streaming down your face. “You’re telling me he took you there and made you do that?”
You’re sitting on your couch in your flat, legs across Jamie’s lap. He’d come over out of nowhere an hour earlier, just knocked on your door and said, “Can we talk?”
You let him in because of course you can talk. You make tea, sit down on the couch, and words just come spilling out of Jamie. It is all about his dad. How he drank, yelled, and hit, precisely in that order. Watching his mum throw him out and accept him back in, in what felt like an endless cycle. Hiding how bad it really was for her because his dad was making her laugh and she was smiling and anyway, it’s not like the bruises were anywhere anyone could see.
Jamie tells you how his dad came to his game the night before, went to the locker room, and how Jamie punched him. He says he’s scared of his dad finding him, because his dad always makes good on a threat, and he doesn’t usually have anyone to talk to but he figured you might be a good listener, what with being his girlfriend of five months and all. He says it all while staring at the chipped mug on your coffee table, the one he insisted you can’t throw out because it’s his favorite, and who care’s if it’s a little damaged? It adds character.
But all you can think about is little eight-year-old Jamie, hiding under his bed and pulling out his front tooth because his dad broke it, so he can tell his mom he just lost it like all the other kids.
You think of what you were doing that year. You would have just turned six, chasing your brother with a fairy wand and a nerf gun, ponytail flying.
The mental image of Jamie under his bed, cowering in a corner, learning to cover up welts and to lie to his mum brings a fresh wave of tears. Just the thought of him being alone makes it feel as though your heart is breaking, and you wish you would have known him then. Your parents would have loved him. Wouldn’t have let his father come around and hit him.
He just finished telling you about Amsterdam, and you can physically feel your soul shatter into pieces on his behalf. The fact that he can’t even remember it is what really gets you. 
Jamie, meanwhile has stopped staring at the mug and is now looking at you. “It- it’s alright, love,” he says. “I’m here now, and it’s alright.”
Through blurry eyes, you can see that it is not alright. Jamie’s eyes are watering now too, and he pulls you onto his lap. He wraps his arms around you and you let him bury his head in the crook of your neck.
You sniff and pull yourself together. “No, Jaim, it’s not alright. You can say, ‘I’m alright,’ or ‘I will be alright,’ but what that shithead did to you is not and never will be ok. And I’m glad you’re telling me about it, and I’m only crying because I keep thinking about how you must’ve felt. It’s not because I can’t handle it, because I can. And I want you to know that I’m here for you, and you’re going to be ok.”
Jamie has started shaking in your arms, and you feel a tears start to drop onto your neck.
You run your fingers through his hair and whisper, “You’re ok. I’m here, I’ve got you, and you’re ok. I’m not leaving. You’re ok.”
That was the first real time Jamie ever told you about his dad. You’d talk about it periodically, whenever it got really bad, and he also started talking to a therapist. Doctor Sharon, you think her name was? Anyway, he’s getting better in his mind, which is good, because sometimes you don’t know what to do beyond listen. And you do. Soon, Jamie’s stories about his dad begin with, “Dr. Sharon says…” and he’s not as angry anymore. Not as jaded, not as broken. There are still deep cuts, but his spirit is coming back. He’s not broken in such a way that he can’t be put back together, piece by piece.
It’s not until you’re out to dinner at your favorite restaurant that something actually happens.
“Jamie,” you say, face serious, empty plates between you.
“Yes, love,” he replies, matching your expression.
“I think that we should get ice cream.”
His face breaks into a smile as he slides his hand off the top of yours to run it through his hair. “Babe. We just ate enough food to put a horse into a coma, and you want ice cream? What about digestion?”
“Jamie. Listen-” you both argue as he pays the bill, takes your hand again, and swings it while you head in the direction of the ice cream shop.
“-And if you think about it, it’s actually a wise food choice,” you continue.
“Babe,” he laughs, “I just think that you might be making up the health benefits of strawberry ice…”
Jamie's counter-argument has trailed off as he stares at something ahead of you, rather someone who is stumbling down the sidewalk in your direction.
You have never seen this man before, but you know exactly who he is.
He's still a good seven feet away when he yells, “Well, well, look who it is. Me son, who can’t even take the time to return his own father’s phone calls! Just joking, just joking, hey? And who’s this fine little lady?” he asks, punctuating his words with a few fake punches in Jamie’s direction as he draws closer.
Jamie is still holding your hand, but has maneuvered himself in between you and his father. He has yet to say anything, so you take your cue from him and keep silent.
James Tartt, Sr. is in front of you now, and it is more obvious now than ever that he is intoxicated. He's swaying a little bit as he stands, and there is the stench of alcohol with each breath he blows. Jamie is holding your hand so tight that it hurts, but you don’t let go. You grip it back.
“Dad,” Jamie says as a way of greeting, face taut.
You're under a streetlight, but not many people are around this time of night.
“Jamie,” his father replies, mocking his serious tone, “is this how I find out you’ve got a girl? Runnin’ into you on the street? Couldn't have sent me a quick message about it, hey? Oh I joke, I joke,” he says. His words are grating, and he keeps punching at Jamie. You do not like it at all. 
“What d’you want, dad?” Jamie asks, gripping your hand harder, if that’s even possible.
His dad wipes his face. “Ey, listen, since you’re ‘ere, what do you say you get me tickets to the Man City game this weekend? Can spend some quality time with this one.” He winks at you in a way you’re sure he thinks is endearing, which is a problem because three things happen in rapid succession: his dad makes a rude comment about quality time, Jamie pushes you behind him saying, “Don’t you ever fucking speak to her,” and James Tartt shouts, “You self-righteous, fuckin’ pussy!” and moves to hit Jamie. 
You’re not sure which one of you he’s talking to, but it doesn’t matter because Jamie’s dad is on the ground and people are starting to stare. You pull Jamie’s still clenched fist down and say, “Babe, let’s get out of here,” while James Tartt is drunkenly trying to stand.
“Babe,” you say a little more forcefully. “let’s go.”
Jamie snaps out of it, lets out a short, “Right, yeah,” and then you’re walking as fast as you can in the opposite direction. 
Not fast enough, apparently, because you still hear his father yell, “That's two you’ve got on me, boy! You better watch your back!”
You have no circulation in your hand and for the first time that night, you feel real fear. Not for yourself, but for Jamie. You may have never met his father, but you’ve heard enough. You know that he always makes good on a threat. 
Jamie looks back twice to make sure you aren’t being followed, and you just walk. You walk a mile past your flat and then circle back. Jamie hasn’t said a single word, just held your hand like it was the only thing anchoring him to the world. It's not until you’re on your doorstep that you decide to break the silence.
“Do you want to talk about it?” You’re facing each other, you one step above him so you’re almost eye-level.
Jamie shakes his head and looks away. “Not- not tonight. I don’t think I can- I’m not sure-”
“Hey,” You slowly lift your free hand and brush a stray strand of hair from his forehead. Not slowly enough, apparently, because he still flinches almost imperceptibly, “It’s alright, Jaim. We don’t have to talk about it tonight.”
Jamie blows out a sigh, and you slide your hand from his hair to his cheek. He just looks so tired, all the anger and defensiveness gone out of him.
“Your place or mine?” you ask because there’s no way in hell you’re letting him be alone tonight.
Jamie shakes his head slightly. “I can’t. I have training tomorrow.”
“Jamie-”
“No, look, I just need something to be normal. And I don’t want you coming over in case me dad fuckin’ decides to come ‘round. I'll come over tomorrow after practice and we can talk then.”
He says it with such resigned finality that you don’t fight him on it. You whisper a soft “alright,” and then wrap your arms around him as tight as they can go. Jamie hugs you so hard you almost can’t breathe, but you don’t ever want to let him go; you memorize the feel of his arms around you, his head in the crook of your neck, and the erratic beat of his heart.
He lets you go after a long moment, waits to make sure that you get inside safely, and then you watch him begin the two-block trudge to his house.
You stay awake until your phone dings with a made it from Jamie, and then, despite all the thoughts swirling in your head, you fall asleep.
——
You startle awake by someone yelling outside, followed by a loud knocking. You squint at the clock which reads an awful one a.m. for a split second you wonder if it’s Jamie at your door, then you catch a word this person is yelling.
Whore.
You’re wide awake now. You grab your phone to text Jamie as his father continues to pound on your door yelling, You stupid fucking bitch, no one messes with James Tartt, I’ll make you fucking pay for that shit he pulled!
The text goes through and you wait a second before calling 999. They answer your call and promise that someone will be over right away. You know for a fact Jamie is still asleep, but you call him just in case and his sleep-deprived voice answers on the third ring. You can only get out a few words - outside, your dad, police - before he is wide awake and on his way over.
——
It's all kind of a blur, really, and you feel truly horrendous, but all you can think about is Jamie. You’re not really sure how he does it, but he is at your flat right before the police. All your neighbor’s lights are on now, and Jamie is in your doorway holding you tight. 
You think about how awful this must be for him.
It's his dad. It’s like being a kid all over again.
You’re supposed to be the one person who he can feel safe around, but now you’re asking him to step into a volatile situation.
He got woken up in the middle of the night when he needs his sleep, which resulted in him seeing his dad get arrested.
All you can say is, “I'm sorry, I’m sorry,” over and over again, as you try not to cry into Jamie’s pajama shirt.
He pulls back a little and wipes a stray tear from your cheek.
“Your place or mine?” he asks, because there’s no way in hell he’s letting you be alone tonight.
You shake your head. “Neither,” you say. “You have training in two hours.”
“Yours,” he says as he gently backs you into the flat and shuts the door. 
“What about Roy?” you ask. Roy gets pissed if Jamie skips training.
Jamie pulls out his phone and narrates as he types: “Granddad. Won't be at training this mornin. If you’re mad about it you can go fuck yourself,” and then presses send.
You have the bizarre urge to laugh. “Jamie, you did not type that.” You try to grab his phone from him but he holds it out of your reach and shuts it off.
“Oi. We’re going to sleep and we ain’t thinkin about anything until 10 tomorrow, yeah?”
“Ok,” you say. 
He takes your hand and leads you to the bedroom, where you finally fall asleep in a tangle of limbs.
You might not be ok right now, but you will be. You’ll both be alright.
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dabislittlemouse · 11 months
Note
okay but.. I'm feeling fluffy.. I wanna see some father dabi like his daughter is such a daddy's girl and they get into so much shenanigans that you have to deal with!! my nephew cut her bangs because she was bored and when she saw it in the mirror, she was so terrified at how it looked and I just wanna see how dabi would react if his daughter did the same thing 😭😭😭😭
Daddy!Dabi Headcanons
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Summary: Dabi as a dad, how he’d behave with his kids, either a son or a daugher
A/N: DADDY DABI IS WHAT GETS MY HEART SO FULL. I’m sure he’d be such a good dad. I wouldn’t want anyone to be my baby’s daddy other than him. Sorry anon my beloved but your ask inspired me to write a lot, kids are so cute and silly sometimes.
MASTERLIST
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₊˚ʚ The thought of being a dad never crossed Dabi’s mind in a million years, but when it did, it terrified him. Not because of the responsibility of having a baby, Dabi is not a pussy, he’d never run away from his responsibilities and leave you alone with your baby. He was scared of the fact that he would not be a good dad, that he would be like….him. Dabi would rather get burned in Sekoto twice as much than hurt his baby in anyway possible.
₊˚ʚ His insecurities would get the best of him, coming off as sarcasm or bad jokes most of the time, such as like “imagine what their reaction will be once they find out their daddy is the boogeyman” or stuff like that. You had to smack him at the back of his head, and have a nice long conversation as to why he will be a good dad and his baby will love him.
₊˚ʚ And in fact, he is a good dad. The best one out there ever. You and the baby are the light of his life. He becomes more cautious and is always looking after you two, providing anything you need, helping you out as much as he can. It is all natural, it’s not like he is forcing himself to be a good dad or something.
₊˚ʚ You can’t help the smile on your face as you see him play with his baby, inhaling their scent and humming a small melody to make them sleep. Look at him, a wanted criminal, being such a softie, it makes your heart so full. His scarred hands, the ones that have destroyed and burned down whole cities, are now gently caressing the baby’s cheek, he is so careful with his movements as if the baby is going to break. Looking at Dabi you realize wouldn’t want any other man to be your baby’s daddy. Nobody other than him.
₊˚ʚ As the baby grows up, speaks the first words, starts crawling, does the first steps, Dabi is witnessing it all, and he can’t believe such small creature is able to make his chest explode from emotions. He’d be having tears in his eyes if his tear ducts weren’t burnt.
₊˚ʚ Dabi would be the type of dad to spoil his kid rotten, even when it was too much. Toys got broken or lost? Don’t worry, daddy will steal get new ones. Mommy didn’t allow chocolates? Don’t worry, daddy will bring so many chocolates and ice-cream instead. Too many dresses? Don’t worry, daddy will get more princess dresses for his precious daughter.
₊˚ʚ At some point you have to tell Dabi to not spoil the kid too much cause it is not good. He never listens though.
₊˚ʚ Dabi is always there to help the kids hide the evidence after having done something bad. (Duh, a wanted criminal, he’s an expert at this) Broken glasses, vases, colored walls, messy rooms, ruining mommy’s lipsticks, the kids come to his daddy, saying that they have done a mistake. Daddy always forgives them and is ready to help them fix everything before mommy comes home.
₊˚ʚ Dabi would be the type of dad to laugh his ass off when he sees his kid with a terrible self-done haircut, or their face painted horribly with whatever colored pens they were using. “Ya little brats never chill huh” he chuckles while cleaning their face with wet wipes.
₊˚ʚ Dabi would wheeze when his kid shows him a drawing that they have done. He doesn’t mean to laugh but the drawing is just… so fucking funny! His kid gets mad and starts stomping their feet around the room, running to mommy and saying how daddy is making fun of them. Dabi will come and apologize over and over, saying that he indeed loved the drawing to the point it made him laugh from happiness.
₊˚ʚ If Dabi was a boy dad, things would be different. Hilarious even. Dabi considers his lovely son as a little friend as well.
₊˚ʚ“You cute little shit look exactly like your mother. Too embarrassed to get anything from daddy huh?” he smirks, pinching his son’s nose slightly. All the baby manages to do is babble incoherent words at his daddy, as Dabi manages to squish his soft cheeks afterwards. “I really hope you don’t get my quirk, would be a real shame if ya did”
₊˚ʚ And as for Dabi’s shit luck, his son indeed inherits his flames. He is flabbergasted as one day his 4-year old son walks in, blue flame glowing on his fist. “Daddy I am like you!” his son yells, happy and excited. A weird feeling places on Dabi’s chest, it is not fear or sadness, it’s more like pride and excitement that his son, his own kid, got his quirk. And he was happy about it too. Dabi swears he will do his best to train his son properly on how to handle that quirk, something which Endeavor never did.
₊˚ʚ Dabi does everything to keep you and your kid out of harm’s way. Balancing his villainous life and the “normal” life with his beloved family is not easy, but he will do it because his little family is the only source of happiness, and he loves you two deeply. He would kill for you. He makes sure to keep his family a secret otherwise if his enemies found that Dabi from the League of Villains has a kid, he’d never forgive himself. He keeps it a secret from Tomura and the others as well for some time.
₊˚ʚ Despite from not having a normal life, Dabi does his best to be present as much as he can on his kid’s life as they grow up. Always praising his beloved kid for their achievements, no matter how small they are. He loves to see them smile as they got daddy’s praise and admiration. He makes sure to provide them everything he never had as a kid back then. Spoiling them rotten isn’t enough, they need to feel his love, Dabi always makes sure to show that to them, that daddy is always here to kiss their wounds when they run and hurt their knees, that daddy is always here to applaud them after having done a messy shitty drawing, daddy is always here to kiss their foreheads if they’ve seen a nightmare.
₊˚ʚ Dabi is literally the best dad ever. He doesn’t have to be perfect, there is no definition of a perfect dad. As long as his children are loved, safe and taken care of.
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Tags: @mostlyheinous @ko-konutty @the-milk-anon @shadowsandshapes @mossy-opal @daniidil @dabislittlebeaniebaby @syrenkitsune @keiskake @arinexeisnotworking @holydayaria @awalkingshame @malewifetouya @drownedbytears @stuckbetweena-and-z @doumadono @high-bats @dabihawksluva @cherryflavoredkissess @vjohnson696 @sukunas-bitxh @wolfylovespoison @dabis0bitch @ifeelsofilthy
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moonchildquinn · 1 year
Text
request: fluff/smut with dad!Eddie 👀🔥
summary: you never wanted a lot of kids, in fact you were very happy with your one with Eddie, or so you thought
warnings: 18+!!! MINORS DNI I SWEAR TO GOD GO AWAY!! slight teasing, secret breeding kink, (Eddie never mentioned it to you) unprotected PIV (better wrap it before you tap it) also fluff and Eddie being a great dad, lemme know if i missed anything and sorry it’s not proofread! pls also know this is my first time writing smut so be nice again pls
word count: 1.8k
Let’s Have Another Baby - Eddie Munson x Fem! Reader
When you had your son with Eddie you thought that, that would be it. It’s not that you hated the pregnancy or any of that it’s just you thought one kid was enough. But every time you saw Eddie with Dio that mindset slowly started to change. Eddie was just the perfect father. Shit you swore your son liked Eddie way more than you at times with how he acted. Eddie says otherwise but you never bought it.
“Babe, babe, babe! Look at what I got Dio today!” Eddie comes running into your shared room. You were in the middle of playing with Dio on the bed but as soon as he heard Eddie he couldn’t get away from you quicker. You give Eddie a look as if saying, see told you, he rolls his eyes.
“What did you get our son?” You ask, grabbing your son and helping him stand on the bed. Eddie unfolds a shirt that had the cover of the band Dio’s new album on it.
“Isn’t it fuckin cool?!” Eddie asked making you giggle at his excitement.
“Yea it’s cool babe, come on let’s see if it fits.” Eddie rushes over and sits next to you and you change Dio into his new t-shirt.
“It fits perfectly!” Eddie says. He jumps up and quickly goes over to your record player and instantly throws on the new album. Dio starts to get excited in your arms. Eddie starts to head bang and of course Dio tries to copy him making you laugh. Eddie stops for a moment at the sound of your laugh and smiles as he sees his son trying to head bang as well. “You’ll get it eventually kid, don’t sweat it.”
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“So the little sheep are coming over today.” Eddie says while you make breakfast.
“Oh?” You say looking back at him for a second. You smile looking at both your boys, with their crazy bed head, and matching Black Sabbeth pjs.
“Mike said Will has the best campaign ever and they insist I see it. Clearly forgetting the best campaign to happen was in ‘86 from yours truly.” He says.
“Sure it was.” You joke.
“Got your panties wet didn’t it?” He says cockily and your jaw drops.
“Edward Munson don’t talk like that in front of my son.” You scold.
“He’s 1 and I covered his ears.” He says. You give him a look and he apologizes.
“Well I guess I’ll make snacks then for everyone.” You say.
“Nothings changed.” He says smiling remembering all the times in high school when you and him started talking, how you would show up to Hellfire with snacks. That’s when he knew you were his person.
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“Bye guys have a good night.” You say as the last of the groups walks out. You close the door and look at Eddie.
“Okay I must admit Will did a great job.” He says and you smile.
“We need to talk.” You say and he instantly frowns.
“Okay Dustin started it, he can be a cocky little shit at times.” Eddie says and you laugh.
“Not about that, I know he can be that’s why he’s my favorite.” You say.
“Then what do we need to talk about? Wait your favorite? Excuse me?” Eddie says, eyebrows raising.
“I think we should have another baby.” You say throwing him off guard.
“Wait really?” He questioned.
“Yea, I know what I said before but seeing how you are with Dio and just how you’ve always been with the group, I just think we should have one more, maybe hopefully have a daughter.” You say and he smiles wide.
“Okay, well just say the word and I’ll send Dio to Wayne’s so we can have the night to ourselves.” He say getting up and coming over to you. He pulls you into him and starts kissing on your neck.
“Eds.”You warn.
“I’m not doing anything.” He says. “Come on let’s clean up and head to bed.”
“Good idea.” You say.
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“You two have fun alright? We’ll see you in the morning!” Wayne says as he holds Dio on his hip. He starts waving his hand and Dio copies him.
“See you later Wayne!” Eddie says getting in his car.
“Bye Wayne!” You smile. Eddie had insisted on making it a date and not just a fuck and done type thing. You deserve so much more than that as he says. He starts the car up and takes off. You had no idea where he was taking you and no matter how much you asked he would not tell you.
“Okay put the blindfold on.” Eddie says when you get to a red light.
“Is this truly necessary?” You ask him.
“Yes, now put it on sweetheart.” He says. You sigh and put it on. “Oh we’re so using that later.” You move your hand around feeling for Eddie before you lightly smack his chest making him laugh.
“Just drive Munson.” You say.
“Will do, Mrs. Munson.” He says and your heart races. You loved it when he called you that even if you weren’t married yet. Eddie finally stops the car and reaches over and undoes your blindfold. Your eyes adjust and you gasp a little.
“You didn’t.” You say looking at Eddie.
“But I did.” He says smiling and getting out of the car and quickly coming over to your side to open the door. Eddie had recreated your guys first date at Lovers Lake. When you step out you grab his face instantly and kiss him.
“I love you, so much.” You say when you finally pull away.
“And I love you, now come on.” He says. He grabs your hand and you go sit down.
“Do you understand how perfect you are Eds?” You ask him.
“If anyone is perfect it’s you sweets. But thank you.” He says smiling at you.
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“So you liked it?” Eddie asked as you both looked up at the stars.
“I liked it the first time it happened, of course I’m going to like it this time too.” You say.
“I just want things to be perfect for you.” He says.
“Eddie you are perfect to me.” You say looking at him.
“You always say that but-.” You cut him off.
“Eds, I mean it when I say that, that’s why I always say that.” You say and he smiles.
“Alright, ready to head home?” He asked you.
“Yes, if you are.” You say.
“I mean I’m enjoying it here but I want you to be comfortable when we get to baby making.” He says, making you laugh.
“You’re so romantic.” You say making him laugh now.
“Come on.” He says getting up. He reaches his hand out and you grab it getting up.
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When you two got home, Eddie really didn’t want to waste time. He didn’t say anything but when you told him you wanted another baby something inside awoke and he’s been wanting to basically pounce on you but he kept himself back until right now. As soon as you guys got to your room clothes were off and Eddie had you pinned down to the bed, a mess after all his teasing.
“Eds please.” You whined. He runs his fingers along your slit again, groaning at how wet you are for him.
“Please what sweetheart? Hmm, what do you need? Come on, use your words, tell me what you need.” He whispers in your ear.
“Just fuck me please, no more teasing.” You beg.
“Fucking Christ sweetheart.” He breathes out moving his fingers away. He grips onto his dick and can’t help but tease you just a little bit more.
“Eddie.” You whine.
“Sweetheart.” He mocks you. You pout and he pouts back, letting the tip of his cock slip in a little making you gasp before he pulls away again and watches your pussy clench around nothing. He just couldn’t help it, he loved hearing you beg for him. He finally gives in though, needing to feel you. He slips into you and bottoms out making you both moan loudly at the feeling. He moves his hands under the bends of your knees and pushes them to your chest and starts thrusting into you at an unforgiving pace.
“Mmm Eds.” You moan out.
“Fuck sweetheart, the second you told me you wanted another baby I’ve been dying to fuck you. Just fill you up with my baby, get you all nice and round again.” He groans out making you whine out.
“That’s right Eds, fuck a baby into me again.” You moan out. He looks at you and smirks.
“Don’t have to tell me twice sweets.” He leans down and starts kissing on your neck, lightly running his teeth along your skin making you breath come out shaky. You clench around Eddie a little and his thrust falter a little. “Oh no, you’re cumming first.” He brings his hand down and starts rubbing your clit making you moan loudly. He leans down and starts sucking on your nipple, and you clench around him, nails digging into his shoulders as your eyes roll to the back of your head, your orgasm hitting you hard. Your breath catching in your throat for a moment.
“Ed-Eddie.” You moan loudly. He rides you through your orgasam and now you made it your goal to help him get to his. “Come on Eds, fill my pussy up, cum inside me, please I want it so bad.”
“Christ!” He groans out into your ear. His throat start to falter and he bites onto your shoulder as he cums, his spill filling you up completely. Eddie catches his breath before he pulls out a little. His cum drips out a little. “Can’t have that now can we?” He takes the tip of his dick, using the tip to collect the cum before he bottoms out into you again making you moan out again. You wrap your arms around him and pull him into you and just hold him against you.
“I love you.” You say.
“And I love you, also just letting you know now, if we have another boy we have to name him Dustin.” Eddie says and you look at him.
“And why is that?” You ask him.
“I promised Henderson if we have had another baby we would name it after him.” He says.
“Not happening, love Dustin but you already got away with the name of our first baby, you’re not getting away with it again.” You say.
“So, Sabbeth is out of the question?” He asked you.
“Geez Eddie.” You say making him laugh. Honestly Sabbeth didn’t sound too bad but we’re not naming your other son Dustin, he could get over it.
“Rest up sweetheart, we have all night still.” He says and you laugh.
“I’m ready for round two now.” You say and he smiles wide. And that was just the start of your long night.
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f0point5 · 5 months
Text
And I feel perfectly fine
Companion piece to the Max Verstappen x bestfriend!reader social media au
✨Set after Y/N’s first date with Elliot✨
A/N: I’m ALIVE! I took a long break because I had my dad’s wedding and then Christmas and also because I have BIG anxiety about posting these writing pieces lol so every time I thought about posting I was like no these suck. But I really miss this blog and the smau so…we move. I hope you guys enjoy these. If you don’t…mind ya business and pretend they never happened haha, I really hope they don’t ruin the smau for anyone! Anyway…enjoy…I hope
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You take your shoes off in the taxi and step straight out onto the granite paving outside the building, your Mach&Mach heels in hand. It’s a nice evening, you think to yourself as you enjoy the warm breeze and the faint scent of sea air. I had a nice evening, you think as an afterthought.
The concierge greets you with a smile, asking how your night was, and you stumble over the answer. He doesn’t notice and doesn’t care, bidding you a perfunctory goodnight as you pad through the lobby to the lifts. You miss the lifts from the old building, with the scratched and worn wood panelling. These are all sleek and cold and the mirrors are some treated glass that makes everything look glum. It’s the mirror, you tell yourself when you catch sight of your own reflection as the lift lurches up towards the penthouse.
You fidget on your way up, thinking what you’ll tell him about your evening when he asks, because you know he will. Just like you know you’ll have to avoid his running shoes right by the door. Just like you know he’ll be awake, on the sim or doing some last minute packing. You know either way he’ll be looking for his old blue and white fleece. You know you’ll lie and say you don’t know where it is and you know he’ll believe you.
It’s the first time all night you’ve felt even a little nervous, and it’s a strangely addicting nausea.
The first thing that happens when you set foot inside the dimly lit hallway is that you step on a running shoe. You stumble forward and the shoe slips out from under you, flying into a cat, you suppose, judging by the cartoonish meow that emirates from somewhere behind you.
“Enfant désordonné,” you mutter as you lad down the hallway towards the living room, dropping your own shoes as you go. “C'est comme vivre avec un enfant en bas âge.”
“Hello,” he calls to you, and you don’t mind that he doesn’t even look up from the sim. You prefer it, even. It makes the fact that you were out without him seem more normal, though it isn’t. You can’t remember the last time you were out without him when he was home.
You wander over to the hulking set up, trying to figure out what track he’s driving. Nordschleife, you realise when he flies through the banked corner. You glance down at him, lit up in blue by the light of the screen, his normally soft features contorted into the hard lines of concentration, eyes shuttered and focused. Putting a hand on his head, you gently carding your fingers through his hair just once, and he loses the rear for a second, correcting himself with a click of his tongue. He says something rude in Dutch under his breath and you laugh at him, reaching down to grab a drink from his mini fridge before heading over to the couch and turning on the TV.
For a while it’s like any other evening.
Eventually you see the screens go black in the corner of your eye and he frog leaps out of his sim rig before heaving over to sit beside you.
“What are we watching?” Max asks, cracking his knuckles as he kicks his feet up.
“The decay of humanity,” you answer with a snort. “Love Island Australia,”
He laughs, his UV glasses sliding down his nose a little. Your eyes linger on him as he fixes them. You’ve teased him about them relentlessly, and you’d never admit it, but you like them.
Wordlessly, you both shift so that he’s lying on the corner of the couch and you’re curled up next to him, his cheek resting against the crown of your head so that you can feel when he finally speaks.
“How was dinner?” He asks during the advert break, the words mumbled into your hair.
“Good. I had lobster Thermidor,” you tell him, getting only a hum in response. “I saw a girl from school at the restaurant, too. I hated her at school, she was so…she used a crocodile birkin to carry her PE clothes,”
This means nothing to him, but you feel his cheek lift in a smile as he hums just to prove he’s listening.
You stay quiet for a while, muscles unwinding to the best of Max’s steady breathing. He wants to ask, the question is lingering unsaid in the small space between your bodies. You know because last time it was you that had questions. You wonder if he feels now like you did then - unsettled and selfish, scared to ask the question because you didn’t know what you wanted the answer to be.
There’s a part of you that wants to tell him how nice it was to discuss Proust and Dostoyevsky, and how nice it was to be able to go to a fish restaurant, how no one filmed you or asked for your picture. There’s a part of you that wants to tell him all the painful truths to make up for the fact that you hated that he wasn’t there, and that somehow that feels like his fault. But you don’t. Because even though you know a petty vindictive nature all but colours your blood, you try to be kinder with Max.
“He’s nice,” you say, telling yourself you’re too tired to say more even though deep down you’re not sure there’s more to say.
“Good.”
“He knows about wine pairings, and art,” you say with soft smile that he can’t see, “and he can actually share a dessert with me all year round without worrying about the calories,”
“Ah, well, you have to marry him then,” Max says sardonically, his shoulder shifting underneath you like a nudge. “Where’s the ring? It better be big,”
He reaches for your left hand, thumb sliding along your ringer as he pretends to inspect it. You jostle him with a scoff, trying to pull away but he squeezes gently, his fingers tangling with yours for a few seconds before he lets go.
The adverts end and the show comes back on. Within seconds, you feel your body begin to fall into a sleepy oblivion. Yeah, you think to yourself, this is a nice evening.
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skz317cb97 · 1 year
Text
Love Letters to Who
Hyunjin x Female reader
Word count: 4.9k
Synopsis: Your 21st birthday you were gifted a mysterious journal. If you thought you were shocked when you saw a reply to your first entry from someone, you just about shit when you saw words appearing on the page out of nowhere, right in front of your eyes! Who was owner of those words? Who was H.H?
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A/N: 18+ ONLY! Here's our Hyunjinnie's! Only one more left! But don't fret! I've gotten a lot of really great requests while I've been working on this series and still plan to do a part 2 to Everything in it's Place so there is plenty more to come! Thank you everyone who has followed along! If you enjoy this part please give it a reblog, like, comment, jump in my an ask box, I love hearing from you guys! Thank you again! As always warnings and smut below the cut!
Warnings: 18+ ONLY MDNI! Cursing/strong language, mentions of controlling and toxic behavior/relationship, oral (m&f receiving), cum eating, unprotected piv sex (please use protection), coming inside. I'm pretty sure that's it. The soulmate series has been fairly tame smut wise I feel like but if I missed something, please let me know and I'll add it immediately!
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It had been a long day but a great one. It was your twenty-first birthday and your family and friends had been over all day celebrating with you. Finger food, cake, presents, the whole nine yards. All of your friends were gone now, your dad had left and your mom stayed over a bit to help you clean up. Just before she left she walked past the table that all your presents had been on and stopped. 
“Oh hey! You missed one!” She grabbed the small gift and handed it to you. You looked for a tag with a name but there was none. You shrugged and ripped it open to find a beautiful leather-bound journal. In the corner there were small gold letters, your initials and H.H. You weren’t sure what that meant but it was a wonderful gift, you loved to journal. Your mom left and you got washed up, in pajamas and in bed. You scrolled around on your phone and made a post thanking everyone for coming and for your gifts. 
‘Oh and to whomever got me the journal, it had no name but thank you so much!’ Maybe whoever got it for you will comment. You put your phone on the charger and pulled out the new journal and a fresh pen. You opened it to the first page and wrote the date. 
‘Today was my twenty-first birthday. It was wonderful. My friends and family were here and I’m very thankful for all of my gifts. It was almost perfect. It would be nice to have someone to share my evening with. To curl up in bed, laugh and talk, make love, fall asleep holding each other. I guess for now, for me, it’s not meant to be. It just makes me a little sad.’ You signed your initials at the bottom of your entry, closed the journal and set it on your nightstand before laying down and going to sleep.  
The next day was back to being like any other. You woke up to your alarm, went for a jog, took a shower, had breakfast and went to work. You worked all day, over your time as usual, and then went home. You made something for dinner which either meant you put something small together or accidentally made a feast. It was hard cooking for one.
You watched a few episodes of a show you’d gotten invested in, then it was time to shower and go to bed to do it all again tomorrow. You crawled into bed and grabbed your new journal to write about any small triumphs or losses during your day. You opened it and you were about to flip to the second page when you noticed writing at the bottom of yesterday's entry that wasn’t yours. 
‘Not sure who wrote the first entry. It’s strange that it was their twenty-first birthday today too. That evening does sound like a nice way to end your birthday though. I wouldn’t mind ending my birthday like that too. I’m sorry they had to be sad at all on their special day. I hope they find someone kind to fall in love with so they can have a birthday like that next year. In fact, I’m going to use my birthday wish for them and wish that very thing. Whoever you are, wherever you are. Happy Birthday.’ H.H. You were so fucking confused. Had someone broken into your apartment? Why would they take nothing and write in your journal?  You turned to the next page and started writing. 
‘I think someone broke into my apartment! Maybe one of my friends? Nothing is missing but someone wrote an entry in my new journal. It was nice but extremely weird. Like I just don’t know why anyone would do that. Everything else about today was totally normal other than that. Maybe I should get some security cameras just to be safe. I should mention it to mom and dad but I don’t want to worry them. I’ll look into cameras tomorrow. Now I feel like the bed will seem bigger and lonelier tonight while I worry about who was in here. Hopefully I’m not gutted in my sleep.’ Your initials signed the entry and you closed the book.
Tuesday was a copy paste day which meant it was exactly like your Monday. You had checked into some cameras, at least for the door and the living room. You were so busy the rest of the day you had forgotten about your journal until you were climbing into bed again. You grabbed it and immediately turned to the second page. Just to see. Just to laugh at yourself for thinking someone broke in just to write a cryptic entry in your new journal. Just to laugh... but you weren’t laughing. There at the bottom of the second page, under your entry from yesterday was the same handwriting and while beautiful you were officially freaked out. 
‘Gutted in your sleep?! Jesus Christ! That’s fucking terrifying! I think I have a theory that I plan on checking tonight. If I’m right, I might scream and burn this thing! We’ll see I suppose.’ H.H. You turned to the next page. You wrote the date. 
‘I don’t know who the hell keeps-’ You stopped writing when words that were not yours started scribbling across the page out of nowhere. You dropped your pen, slammed the book closed and threw it. 
“What the fuck!?” You rubbed your eyes and looked at the journal on the floor across your room. You didn’t just see that. It was a trick of the light or a long day. Yea, it was a long day and you were just seeing things. You were certain when you went and grabbed that book and opened it that it was going to be a page with a date at the top and half a sentence.
You slowly walked over, knelt down, and picked up the journal, then went and sat back down on your bed. You closed your eyes and opened it. You slowly opened them and you were in disbelief. There on the page, in the same writing from the two days before... 
‘Do you see this?’ You did, but what were you seeing? More words started appearing. 
‘If you are seeing this, please, write back.’ You picked up your pen. 
‘I see it.’ You waited and then words started appearing again. 
‘Holy shit! Okay so do you need like help crossing?’ You scrunched up your face confused by what they were asking. 
‘What do you mean? Crossing what? Like a bridge?’ 
‘How can I help settle your spirit? Is there a message from beyond that you would like me to pass along to a loved one?’ Oh for fucks sake. They thought you were a ghost. 
‘I am not a ghost!’ 
‘Oh no you didn’t remember that you died! Were you gutted in your sleep?! Oh god I’m so sorry!’ You shook your head and scribbled. 
‘No no no. I’m just not dead. Not a ghost.’ There was a long pause before the next words appeared on the page. 
‘Are you sure? On a scale of 1-10 how certain are you?’ You pressed your fingers into your eyes taking a deep breath. Be understanding. It was a super crazy situation. 
‘I’m sure. 1,000. I’m very much so alive. You said your birthday was the other day too. Did you get a journal?” 
‘Yeah. Did you send it? What the hell is going on?!’ Whoever was writing seemed like they were starting to freak out a bit. You tried to calm them down. 
‘No I didn’t send it. I’m not sure what’s going on. Let’s try and keep calm. My name is y/n, what’s yours?’ 
‘I’m Hyunjin. How are you so chill about this? This is the craziest thing that has ever happened to me!’ You weren’t really sure why you weren’t freaking out yourself. 
‘I don’t know how to explain it but it doesn’t feel like it’s supposed to be a scary or ominous thing. I don’t understand what’s happening or why but it kind of feels like we were meant to get these books. I don’t know I’m sure that sounds crazy.’ It definitely sounded crazy. You didn’t know this man at all why would you both get some magic book that allows you to write to each other? 
‘So what do we do?’ Why in the world was he asking you? You had no idea. 
‘I don’t know. I guess only one of us should use it. Since you used your birthday wish for me you take it.’ 
‘Well wait now. Wishing you well and me keeping some magic journal isn’t exactly a fair trade’ 
‘Really Hyunjin it’s okay. Besides it’s only a magic book if we both write in it. Enjoy and happy birthday.’ You signed your name, a small heart, then closed the book and put it away on your bookshelf. You grabbed another journal and made an entry in it about the magic journal and Hyunjin and then you went to bed.  
For the first few days after, you found yourself looking over at the bookshelf wondering if Hyunjin was using it, tempted to look inside, but you had told him he could use it and that would be invading his privacy, his innermost thoughts and you couldn’t do that. So you left it. About a month after your birthday a guy accidentally bumped into you coming out of the café, making you spill your coffee. 
“Oh my god I’m so sorry!” You looked at the, luckily, iced coffee down the front of you and sighed. 
“It’s okay it happens.” You went to walk off and get clothes that were not saturated in bean water when he hurried to stop you. 
“Wait uh... I feel terrible really. Let me make it up to you!” You started shaking your head. 
“No really it’s not nec-” He put his hands together. 
“Please, let me do something... uh... let me take you to dinner?” You stopped surprised. You figured he’d ask to replace the coffee and you were prepared to say no again but he asked about dinner. 
“Dinner?” He nodded, smiling. 
“Yes! Please! Let me take you to dinner to make up for being such an absolute klutz.” Wow. He was really cute and he seemed nice. Hyunjin had used his birthday wish for you, maybe the universe was putting it into play. 
“Okay, dinner.” He smiled ear to ear and gave you his phone number so that you could make the arrangements, after you got out of your wet coffee-stained clothes that is. The cute klutz's name was Ian and the dinner to make up for exploding your coffee on you ended up being the first of many. Weeks, months went by and lots of other firsts came and went. First kiss, first time sleeping together, first Christmas as a couple.  
Things started out perfect and you were so happy. Then over a period of time, you started to see another side of Ian. It started with him getting irritable and he’d do little controlling things. They were always so subtle and the way he would suggest something questionable he always made it seem like it should be so reasonable.
You put up with a lot for quite a while but after five months of it, when Ian asked you to move in and you said no, that was the last straw. You’d been at dinner and he’d quietly accepted the no while in the restaurant but once dinner was over and you were in the car, he lost it. He was yelling as he drove recklessly through the streets, narrowly missing a few cars and running multiple red lights.
You were scared he would crash you into someone on purpose out of sheer anger. Somehow you made it to your apartment without wrecking. When he came to a screeching halt out front you immediately got out of the car and bent down looking in mad. 
“It’s over Ian. We’re done!” You slammed the car door shut and he started to get out of his car. 
“Wait... baby!” The babies were starting and you weren’t waiting. After that car ride and the things he said, you were done. You went inside your apartment and you heard him speed off, his tires chirping. His texts and calls started right after and you just turned your phone off. He’d give up eventually. You laid out on your bed and cried, angry with yourself for letting him fool you, angry for fooling yourself.  
Deep down you felt it. It wasn’t right, he wasn’t ever going to be the one no matter what you had tolerated. You knew you did what was best but you still felt the void it left too. For the first time in six months, you went over to your bookshelf that you kept the journal on and grabbed it.
You walked back over to your bed and sat down with your legs crossed and the book in your hands. You sat there looking at it for a good while. You just needed to pour your heart out and you could do that in any one of your journals but you wanted to do it in this one. You flipped to the first blank page you found and started writing. 
‘I didn’t read any of your entries I promise. I just had to...I don’t know what I thought. I guess I thought your wish had come true. I met a guy and I thought the wish really came true, but it ended up being a horrible mistake. I think about you all the time. I don’t know why when we only wrote each other the one time and I know this might be strange to say but I miss you.’ You signed your name and a heart and closed the journal putting it on your nightstand, then went to sleep.
The next morning you woke up and your eyes were immediately on the journal when they opened. You sat up and grabbed it but hesitated to open it. What if he didn’t write back? What if he was mad that you wrote in it again when you said you wouldn’t? What if he thought it was weird that you said you missed him? How can you miss a guy you don’t even know?
You took a deep breath and opened the book to the last page you had written on. There underneath your entry was Hyunjin’s beautiful handwriting and you could feel a weight lifting off your chest.  
‘He didn’t hurt you did he?! I’m so sorry it didn’t come true. If I’m being honest, I miss you too and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you. I don’t know why I can’t get you out of my head when I don’t even know you. Go to the page after our last conversation and start reading the entries.’ H.H. He wanted you to read his journal entries? You were confused. You went to the page he told you and started reading. 
‘It’s been a few days. I’ve opened the book here and there to see if maybe you had written something. I don’t know, I feel like if I'm not using it for its intended purpose then I shouldn’t use it and its purpose was for me to write you. I don’t know why. I hope you’re doing well wherever you are and I hope one day you open your book and see this. Until then I’ll write to you.’ You turned the page and there was the next entry.
Hyunjin telling you about his day, and then questions about things he wished he knew about you with space left beneath for your answers. He would tell you his answers as well, his likes and dislikes. You went through, day after day, it was all always written to you.
Poems he’d read, work he’d finished, random silly things about his days that usually made you laugh and then questions. You read every page, answered every question and by the time you got to where you had written again you felt like you had known Hyunjin your whole life. You looked at the last words Hyunjin had written on the page.  
‘I think we should meet.’ Your heart skipped a beat and you started to panic. Meet?! It seemed so sudden, so fast. You had only just ended things with Ian but something was drawing you and Hyunjin to each other and not just the journals. You decided there was no use fighting it. 
‘When? Where?’ Hyunjin told you to meet him Sunday at eleven at the café by the park. You would get coffee, go for a walk, and talk. 
‘How will I know it’s you?’ Hyunjin thought for a minute. 
‘I’ll wear my hair pulled back.’ Sunday was only a day away. You panicked most of Saturday and rifled through your whole closet deciding what to wear. You decided on nice but casual, you picked a wide necked oversized sweater and a tank top with some jeans and tennis shoes.
Sunday you were walking up to the café when you saw a guy sitting at an outdoor table reading a book. He was hands down the most beautiful person you’d ever laid eyes on. Two beauty marks adorned his face, one on his cheek, the other under an eye, he had lips that looked pillowy soft, and long blonde hair pulled back. There was no way that was Hyunjin, but what were the chances of two guys with long hair pulled back showing up at the café at the same time. You slowly walked up ready to make an ass out of yourself when you realized it wasn’t him. 
“Uh... Hyunjin?” The man looked up from his book and his eyes locked on you. His mouth was slightly opened and he didn’t say anything at first. You just stood there, you didn’t know if it was him or not. Finally the man shook his head and smiled at you. 
“Yes! Sorry! Yes, I'm Hyunjin. You must be y/n.” He stood and leaned in to hug you as you put out your hand, then you leaned in to hug him and he stuck his hand out. You both laughed and leaned in for a little hug then you joined him at the table he’d been sitting at. 
“What would you like? I’ll go order it for you.” You gave Hyunjin your order and he went inside to get your coffee. You pinched yourself as you sat there waiting to make sure you weren’t dreaming. The man that penned at least a hundred and fifty-three pages, written to you, was not only intelligent and kindhearted he was also insanely gorgeous.
It only took Hyunjin a couple minutes to get your coffee. When he came back he sat across from you and set your drink down. You had a little small talk as you sat there and you were nervous. You didn’t know why you were nervous, but you were.  
“Do you want to go on a walk in the park?” You weren’t sure if he was picking up on your energy but a walk sounded perfect. 
“I’d like that.” Hyunjin put his book in his messenger bag and hung it around himself. You both grabbed your coffees and took the path that led to the flower garden in the park. As you walked around you were able to calm down a little and it was easier to talk as you both admired the flowers.
You got quiet when, part of the way through, Hyunjin’s fingers wove through yours and he held your hand as you continued to walk along the path. After a minute he stopped and faced you. God he was beautiful and with the flowers and the perfect weather he looked ethereal. 
“y/n I want to say something but I don’t want to freak you out.” You nodded. 
“Okay, just so you know if you’re trying to not freak me out, saying that is not a great start.” Hyunjin laughed nervously. 
“I suppose not.” You grabbed his other hand and squeezed them both gently. 
“Go ahead Hyunjin, I’m just teasing. It’s okay.” He took a deep breath. 
“I... I think we might be soulmates.” You wanted to act shocked. You wanted it to be a startling hypothesis, but it wasn’t. In fact, as soon as he said it you felt like an idiot for not realizing it sooner but not everyone has a soulmate. 
“Oh my god! Of course!” He breathed a sigh of relief hearing you agree. He was worried you might not believe him, that you might reject him. He also didn’t want you to think that just because you were soulmates you had to rush anything. There was still so much to learn about each other.
You both were so caught up in the moment you didn’t notice the grey clouds making their way in. Then suddenly the sky opened up and it started to pour down rain. Hyunjin gripped your hand tighter and ran for the closest building with an awning. You were both soaked laughing, you looked up at him and saw stray wet hairs stuck to his face. You pushed them back, your fingers tracing his skin and your eyes watched as his tongue darted across his pouty lips.  
You couldn’t take it anymore. You stood on your toes, wrapped your arms around his neck and kissed him under that awning in the rain. Then Hyunjin wrapped his arms around you and kissed you back. It was like fireworks were going off. It was so different than your first kiss with Ian. That first kiss with Ian was when you knew it wasn’t right that he wasn’t the one, but your first kiss with Hyunjin? Felt like coming home. 
On your and Hyunjin’s twenty second birthday you spent your shared day with both your families and friends. When the day was over and everyone had left, you laid in bed together, laughing as Hyunjin dramatically recalled how he reacted to the entry you had written about hoping to not be gutted. You laid your head on his chest and as your laughter died down you could hear his heart thumping. Without a word you sat up and climbed on top of Hyunjin straddling his waist, then leaned over and kissed him. Your lips parted from his only enough to speak. 
“Happy birthday Hyunjinnie.” You kissed him again and he held your face as he deepened it. He pulled away breathless. 
“Happy birthday baby.” He kissed you again and started running his hands down your body. They traveled under your night shirt and he gripped your soft breasts as his tongue explored your mouth. You sat up quickly pulling the shirt off over your head and then leaned back down and claimed Hyunjin’s lips again.
You started pulling his shirt up and your lips left his long enough to pull it off. You were grinding your hips into Hyunjin’s, hands gripping each other, teeth biting, tongues tasting. Hyunjin sat up wrapping his arms around you and then suddenly you were on your back under him. He pulled down his sweatpants and kicked them off as he reached into your panties and started teasing your clit with two fingers. 
“So wet for me already?” You pushed at him. 
“Hyunjinahh! Don’t tease!” He smiled before kissing down your neck and shoulder, the two fingers still gently rubbing your arousal over the sensitive nerves. 
“No teasing tonight baby. I’m gonna make you feel so good.” He kissed down your chest and started sucking on your breasts. You wove your fingers through his hair as he kissed and sucked at your nipples. You moaned when the two fingers he had been rubbing you with slid inside you.
Hyunjin made his way down your body as he fingered you and when his face hovered over your clothed core you thought you might lose your mind at the sight of him. He pulled your panties to the side and when he started to eat you out you gripped his hair again, tighter. 
“Jinnie! God yes! Right there!” Hyunjin pumped his fingers into you and licked your clit before kissing it. 
“Right there jagiya?” He started sucking on your clit and you aggressively shook your head. 
“YES! FUCK YES!” Hyunjin took his time. He’d mapped your body out countless times now and he knew how to drive you to the brink of madness from pleasure alone and he was going to do just that. His fingers worked inside you brushing against your g spot as he continued to lick and suck on your clit you could feel the building climax inside you. 
“Please... please... please...” You plead with Hyunjin needing the release you were desperately close to. His pillowy soft lips latched around your clit again and when he hummed against you, you went plummeting into your orgasm. 
“Hyu-Hyun-Hyunjinnie! Oh my god! Yesyesyes!” Your hips tried to grind up against his face but his strong hands held you down as he continued to guide you through your climax. He gently took long slow licks up your glistening cunt as you started twitching from the overstimulation.
He gave your pussy one last soft kiss and then climbed back up towards your face, your lips. His pressed against yours, so plush, as the fog in your head started to lift. You started sitting up prompting Hyunjin to as well, although he wouldn’t stop kissing you. He loved the way you tasted. Your skin, your lips, your cunt, he could never get enough.
You guided him to sit back against the headboard, his legs spread. Your lips only left his to leave a wet trail of kisses down Hyunjin’s neck and chest. His fingers threaded through your hair as you made your way down his body. When your lips hovered over his throbbing cock you looked up at him, licking your lips. He couldn’t help the shuddering breath he took at the sight of you between his legs. He gently traced his fingers down your face, biting his lip. 
“Please baby... suck on it.” You nodded smiling and put the tip in your mouth, running your tongue around it and sucking like Hyunjin had asked of you. He moaned and pulled your hair up into a ponytail with his hands so he could see as you started to work your way further down his shaft. When you gagged on him, you pulled off stroking him, looking into his eyes, watching them glint from the pleasure you were giving him. 
“I want you to cum in my mouth Jinnie.” His jaw dropped surprised to hear you say that. He’d never done that before. 
“I... are you sure?” You licked your lips looking at him and nodded. Hyunjin nodded back and you started sucking his dick again. You bobbed up and down, using your spit to stroke what you couldn’t fit. His tip kept pressing against the back of your throat and Hyunjin thought he would lose his mind it felt so good. His breath came faster as his stomach sucked in and out. 
“Fuck! I’m gonna cum!” You hummed giving your permission again to cum in your mouth and the vibrations from your lips pushed him over the edge. He whimpered and his body stiffened, as well as his grip on your hair as he started to spill into your mouth. 
“Oh god! Oh fuck! Jagiya mmmm!” His head thumped back against the headboard as you drank down every drop of his cum. You licked the tip one last time and looked up at his fucked-out face, head tilted back. He took another deep breath and looked down at you again.
When he saw that sweet face of yours, his heart melted. He was yours. Always. He loved you so much. He pulled you to sit in his lap and he held your face as he kissed you. You sat there like that for who knew how long. Arms wrapped around each other, slowly, softly kissing.
After making out a while, you slid your panties off, leaned forward and gripped Hyunjin’s cock, pushing it inside you. You both held on to the other, moaning as he filled you. You slowly started working your hips against his as you looked into each other’s eyes. It was so intimate, so sensual. 
“I love you Hyunjin.” He kissed you and every time he kissed you it felt just like the first, fireworks. He pressed his forehead to yours as you continued riding him. 
“I love you too y/n, I love you so much...” He held you as your bodies pressed and rubbed together, sweaty, hot. You made love like that for what felt like forever, for what felt like would never be long enough. You both were holding the others face, foreheads pressed together, eyes locked on their love, their forever, as you came together.
Tears streaked your face as your trembled through your climax, Hyunjin’s warm cum filling you. He wiped your tears and hugged you closely. You rested your head on his shoulder as Hyunjin softened inside you, both of you basking in the warmth of the other. When heartbeats and breathing returned to normal you curled up together in bed. Hyunjin’s birthday wish for you had come true after all, in ways he never had imagined. 
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