LET'S GIVE IT EVERYTHING WE'VE GOT--
IT'S PUNISHMENT TIME!
His name is Kurochi Ouma. He just kicked the chair out from under him.
He is hanging by a noose that crushes his wind pipe, making him unable to breathe.
But in his final moments he realized all too late one crucial mistake--that he doesn't want to die. That he has things to live for.
He is the Ultimate Cryptographer. He is good at puzzle solving and mathematics. He is smart.
But smarts can't save him now. There are no ledges to stand on. There are no tools in his reach.
He tries and tries to solve the puzzle to save his own life. But he fails. This maze of Sudoku will be his tomb.
He wants to live. He wants to live. He wants to l i v e.
But it's too late.
He's already kicked the chair from under him.
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list of my favorite things about jeremy knox:
he's an english major
he's a middle child
he says words like "heck" and "hecka" and "hecked"
his best friends are lesbians
barkbark von barkenstein
having different animal noises as ringtones for the trojans based on what position they play
uses a light racquet for more control over winning stick checks
bleached his entire head because he couldn't go through with frosted tips
"you are going to be my success story: jean moreau the person, not jean moreau of the perfect court."
gay
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Nico and Percy's dynamic through the series is eternally funny to me, because it's just. like.
Percy's having a constant mental struggle between his fatal flaw of loyalty with a promise he made to Bianca to protect Nico, versus his Big 3 kid desire to maim other Big 3 kids / Poseidon descendant urge to totally maim Nico specifically. He hates Nico so so much. He thinks Nico's annoying and weird at best, and creepy/sketchy when he's older. The only positive thoughts Percy has towards Nico are "He's Bianca's brother and Bianca was my friend and I owe her/He's Hazel's brother and Hazel is my friend and would kill me if I was mean to him," "He's a powerful asset and useful ally (if questionable)," and "He's kinda pathetic and I feel maybe a little bad about it." Percy has multiple occasions throughout the series where he strongly considers - and on one occasionally actually goes through with - throttling Nico.
Meanwhile, Nico is following around Percy like a lost puppy. He explicitly can never bring himself to even dislike anything about Percy no matter how hard he tries. He has a whole bit in BoO where he's mentally going "UGH he's so stupid BUT IT'S ENDEARING HOW DARE HE." He's totally smitten. He's making deals with his dad for Percy. He's making convoluted plans to help Percy stand a chance against Kronos. During the entirety of BoTL it's like he's playing tsundere - "I'm helping NOT PERCY SPECIFICALLY with this quest! Me helping Percy would be SILLY because I DEFINITELY HATE HIM." Then he proceeds to show up to Percy's birthday party to basically ask him on a weird date and spend the entire next book scrambling around trying to help him or protect him or impress him. And Percy could not give less of a shit.
Just. That dynamic is so funny to me. Percy is the founder of the Nico Protection Club in that he's the one they're all protecting Nico from and meanwhile Nico is throwing himself at Percy to the point where the literal god of gay love calls him out on it.
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ohhh so this saga just will not end, okay!!!
last month I started an emergency fundraiser because the situation with my neighbor, who has been showing stalker-like behavior, escalated to the point where I no longer felt safe staying in my apartment. here's that original post
I'd remade my tiktok a few weeks ago after several years of inactivity to use for venting & vlogging. it had like no followers + just two videos uploaded. I got this text immediately after I saw him at the top of the stairs to the ground floor as I was coming back in from checking the mail. I had the "find by contacts" shit all turned off so idk HOW he found my tiny nothing tiktok (it's privated now) but he decided to send me this message about it. some of the things he mentioned in the text (like listening at my door???? I said listening to hear my door open/close but not listening at it) aren't even things I talked about which is also raising some alarm bells.
I haven't responded to his texts in months but he continues to send them and now it's shit like this. I am truly beyond words. it's incredible how the second he is confronted with how weird his behavior is I am "evil". I didn't film him, I didn't post any identifying information other than "my creepy upstairs neighbor" and now he is mad that the shoe fits when he's the one that tried it on.
My lease is up at the end of the month regardless, and I'm hunting for apartments actively. I need to get out of here, and I'm doing everything in my power to do that, but I need help with application fees, transportation and moving costs, and a deposit. I'm seeing a place on the 11th (tomorrow, as of when I write this) that seems promising and really hope it ends up being the one. I'm sorry I've had to post about this so much, but mutual aid has legitimately been the only way I have ever been able to pull myself out of a hole like this. even just a few dollars does help.
v3nm0 is alumirust
c4sh4pp is $doppelgougar
p@yp44l is
[email protected]
buy some of my art
GFM fundraiser link
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thinkin bout how orv starts with kim dokja actively working to ensure that kim namwoon dies during the first scenario
thinkin bout how kim namwoon was a teenager at the start of the scenarios, dealing with the apocalypse using the mental paths that came easiest, jumping into the new world with both feet
thinkin bout kim dokja as a teenager. tired. hurt. alone. his internal and external struggles ignored by the adults around him. choosing to throw himself off a rooftop because there wasn’t anything in his life worth living for
thinkin bout how kim dokja woke up again, even though he had planned not to
thinkin bout a teenage boy. lost, alone, broken, scared, angry, in need of someone to come and show him how to keep moving forward
thinkin bout a protagonist in a webnovel who is an example to you of how to survive against all odds. a mantra to repeat when living life as yourself is too hard
thinkin bout a hardened and powerful hero who knows exactly how this world works, who holds out a hand offers you a place with him
thinkin bout teenage kim namwoon, looking to yoo joonghyuk as captain, teacher, and protector
thinkin bout teenage kim dokja, looking to yoo joonghyuk as role-model, hero, and refuge
thinkin bout teenage kim dokja, who saw himself more as kim namwoon than any of yoo joonghyuk’s other companions
thinkin bout adult kim dokja, reclusive and unsocial, hiding his phone from his coworker so she doesn’t see what he’s reading. convinced that yoo joonghyuk would look down on him if he learns who he “really” is. ashamed of any details kimcom learns about his past
thinkin bout what happens to a life when the person living it has never seen in it any redeeming qualities or objects of value. how someone feels about life when they tried and failed to give up that life a decade ago, and every day since has felt almost accidental
thinkin bout the lesser fire dragon. the disaster of floods. the strongest in seoul dome. the devourer of dreams. the 73rd demon king. the industrial complex. the war between good and evil. the wager with secretive plotter.
thinkin bout the most ancient dream. an empty station. a cold and hard bench. bandages and a notebook and a too-loose uniform. smaller than he should be for his age and more broken than any child should ever become. alone.
thinkin bout an unbreakable faith, shattered. a family frantically throwing themselves at their heart to save him from himself. desperate hands prying a blade out of shaking ones, moments before the jagged edge pierced deep into vulnerable flesh
thinkin bout how the younger kim dokja, recently released from the hospital, does not watch. instead, he instinctively curls up to protect the parts of himself already hurting the most. he begins to repeat his mantra
thinkin bout how kim namwoon kicked and fought and screamed and stabbed. and then, when he realized there wasn’t anything he could do, he got down on his knees and begged kim dokja for his life
thinkin bout how kim dokja just stood over him, held him in place, and looked at him in silence as the clock ran out
thinkin bout kim dokja at the beginning of his story and at the end of his story. in a subway. looking down at a teenage boy.
making a choice. the same choice, both times.
the first time: an explosion, a blood splatter on his reflection, and a confused and wary protagonist who has lost one asset and gained another
the last time: arms holding him back, a family hugging him tight, and another protagonist who steps in front of him. holds the child close. forgives him everything. offers up anything more he could need. and kim dokja watches as the person with the strongest claim to vengeance upon this younger facsimile of himself instead gently gathers up the most ancient dream, tucks him close against his chest, and walks away with him safe and sound in his arms.
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