Since the ask box commands to vote Bumble in that tourament (which I did, cuz she was SCREWED over to the extreme) could you talk a whole lot about BB!Bumble's dyspraxia? Since we are talking about the *everything in canon* she got for the High Crime of being a fat foreigner woman and abuse victm in warrior cats, let's talk about the universe where we add disabled to her list of High Crimes but she isnt done dirty as balls(sorry if all this is worded weird)

Plus, I'm personally having issues writing a dyspraxic character (mostly because i kinda suck at absorbing information about things like disability when not using characters as exemples) and you've really helped me in the past with making characters with BPD, so it would be personally useful in character making

(Sorry if I'm rude, I deeply respect your work and it greatly inspires me, especially Clanmew)

All righty! BB!Bumble's dyspraxia!

First off, for newcomers;

WHY I ADDED DYSPRAXIA TO BUMBLE

In canon, Bumble is called a fat, useless kittypet, before being dragged back to her domestic abuser. She then dies while trying to survive on her own, starved to the point of emaciation before Clear Sky murders her.

A very common fandom response to this is essentially, "shes NOT useless! She could hunt/fight if you taught her!" And a lot of AUs will have her survive, learning how to be Truly Useful with all the same skills as everyone else.

I won't lie; I think that's very disappointing.

You're not refuting the rotten heart of this ideology, you're just doing what DOTC already does with Jagged Peak. You're AGREEING. You're saying she WOULD be useless if she couldn't hunt or fight like a wild cat, giving her Coolgirl Badass moments to haha embarass her bigots, and Actually the only problem here is that they didn't give her a chance.

What if they GAVE her that chance, and she COULDN'T hunt or fight like them? Would it be okay to send the battered housewife back to her domestic abuser? Hopefully fucking not!

Let's be frank; None of the groups in DOTC are starving. Not even after the prey sickness pandemic.

"Starvation Rhetoric" is an excuse, only ever rolled out by monsters like Clear Sky as justification for stealing land, murder, and throwing out cats the groups deem unworthy of life.

Yet, this gets rolled out for Bumble specifically, by the MOOR CATS, who are supposed to be opposing his ideology.

And that's where I'm starting from.

Okay. What if she couldn't perform physically like other cats?

What if she was part of a group that DID have real concerns about not having enough food?

How does Bumble herself cope with her feelings, and her desire to help her friends and contribute to a group that loves her?

Let's go through all that, and attack the heart of the idea. In fact, we're going to be doing a lot of it, with a significant portion of early ThunderClan being disabled cats.

(Thunder Storm has three legs. Bright Storm has asthma. Sunlit Frost loses the use of both front paws and ends up with chronic pain.)

Bumble's Dyspraxia

The first thing to know about dyspraxia (or DCD, Developmental Coordination Disorder) is that it comes in a LOT of different forms. The next thing to know is that it's RIDICULOUSLY common. Some estimates say 5% of the population has it-- 1 in 20 people.

It's heavily associated with autism and ADHD. The "classic" symptoms are general clumsiness and motor control issues, like having a hard time tying shoes. But these are also symptoms of dyspraxia;

Short-term memory issues, but not long-term

Being constantly covered in bumps and bruises

Having a hard time telling lefts and rights

Difficulties holding pencils or writing in general

"Wobbliness" including tripping mid-step or tripping over your own feet

Issues in the acquisition of "muscle memories," being slow to acquire physical skills.

Stuttering and taking long pauses before responding to someone else speaking

Most dyspraxics won't have all of these, these are symptoms. Not a checklist.

My partner describes theirs as like "constantly working with cold hands through a layer of gloves." The stiffness of being in a freezer, paired with the general delay of having a cover over your skin.

Mine is more focused on the mental side, acquiring new skills is unnaturally difficult, my reaction time is delayed, and I stumble into things.

Every person with dyspraxia is different, but what links us is that we're uncoordinated. We can't help it, telling us to try harder or pay more attention doesn't work. We aren't being careless-- our brains don't send signals to our bodies properly.

I'm basing Bumble's off my own. Her mate, Turtle Heart, shows her over and over how to hunt. It never sticks. She tries to pick up battle moves from Thunder Storm to help defend herself from Clear Sky's goons. It doesn't work.

She's really trying, she really is. The Moor group quickly loses patience with her, and Bumble is well aware that she's only tolerated on Turtle Heart's vouch. Her worst fears come true when Tom steals their children, and her mate is killed trying to retreive them.

That messes with her, and makes her believe that she really is worthless and a burden.

ThunderClan was FOUNDED on Thunder Storm's fury, breaking off his supporters to retreive her from exile, and Bumble's struggle with self-worth begins in earnest.

There's one thing she's confident about, and really loves. Bumble is trilingual, outgoing, and confident in her ability to talk to others. That's what she can add, and what she wants to do.

ThunderClan is different. It works with every strength and weakness of its members, and values diplomacy to keep it afloat against the odds. Bumble really is needed, but eventually even her translation work becomes less special as more kits grow up bilingual. Eventually, this too feels taken from her.

And then it's back to square one. Her mate is gone, one of her kits betrayed her, Owl Eyes is a big strong man who doesn't need his mum anymore. She's left with her fumbling paws, taking more from the pile than she puts in.

One can only hope she realizes that ThunderClan was born out of love for her. That it was never about what she could add. She didn't have to confront it in the main story because so much was happening, but as peace settles over the forest, it's time for her to start to unpack that idea.

❝HEAR IT FROM ME❞

❦ summary; a person's voice, so unique and custom to them and only them. it's familiar to those who know it and sought after to those who love it.

♪the characters in this story; cater diamond, gn!reader

✎word count; 822

☛the author's notes; nothing to note...

☪look at the catalogue?

The phone rang once, no answer. Twice, no answer. Three times, and the call was picked up.

“H... Hello?”

He smiled at the sound of your voice and answered quickly. “Morning cutie! Did you sleep well?”

Cater hears you groan into the phone, probably dragging a hand down your face to try and wake yourself up a bit more.

“Cater, it is five am where I am right now. You could’ve at least texted me.”

He chuckles a bit at your tired voice, but is still smiling regardless. “Oh, I know, but I’m excited to hear your voice! I’m-”

You’re quick to interrupt him. “‘Coming back today and can’t wait to see you.’ I know Cay, you’ve been calling me almost everyday since you got the notice.” There’s a small little affectionate chuckle from you and it makes Cater melt.

Cater was a senior now, with you not being a senior. As a senior, Cater had to go off campus to get some real world experience and get some internships. Fortunately, he had gotten a few offers that he was happy to accept but, unfortunately, the ones he wanted were all quite a bit away from NRC and Sage’s Island. That also meant being away from you.

He whined and despaired about this, and Cater was very tempted to take some of the closer options. But you, ever the angel, persuaded him to take the ones that he wanted. You told him you’d be fine without him and that it was only a year, that the two of you could always call and text one another.

While not the most preferred situation, Cater did do his best to keep in contact with you, calling more than texting, despite you telling him to just text you and not do a minute call talking about his lunch. He still insisted on calling though, and he was thankful that you put up with him for so long.

“Anyway, how’s class these days?”

He hears shuffling on the other end and a small sigh before your answer.

“Could be better, could be worse. Trying to get better grades in Crewel’s classes.”

Cater giggles lightly. “If you want, I could help.”

He hears you laugh now and it makes Cater smile wide.

“Sweet, but no. I’ll be fine, Cay.”

“Aww. Oh well then.”

“How long until you get here?”

Cater pulls the phone away from his ear and checks the time. It’s 5:17 am and, from how fast his transport is going, he estimated a good hour or so, if he’s lucky.

“I’ll probably get here at maybe six, six twenty.”

You smile and chuckle lightly. “That’s good. This means I have an hour to sleep. Night night.”

Your words make Cater panic, and he doesn’t want you to hang up on him. “Wait, wait, wait! Don’t hang up, please!”

“What?”

His cheeks flush red and he grips the phone a bit tighter. Seven, that was embarrassing to say out loud and your confused what doesn’t help a lot either.

Cater hears more shuffling, more movement and you sound much more awake now. “Why don’t you want me to hang up, Cater?”

“Haha it’s just... y’know...” His voice got quieter and quieter, this wasn’t like him at all and he wished that you could read minds so he wouldn’t say all this aloud. Maybe he should’ve just texted you, to avoid this.

“No Cay, I don’t know.” Your voice, it’s gentle, soft and caring. It makes Cater’s chest fill with emotions that he wants to bask in. “You can tell me, I won’t judge.”

The words are there in his chest, ready to slip past his lips, and he just wants to screw his lips shut. But he doesn’t want to say no to you, to lie to you.

“I like your voice...”

There’s a pause, he hears you suck in a sharp breath and he waits for your answer, fingers curling in a tight fist. He dreads anything negative that may come from your lips, but he just wants to hear you say something, just anything.

“You...” Another pause, you suck in a breath. “You like my voice.”

Cater makes an affirming noise. You let out a breathy laugh and he hopes that it’s a good thing.

“Cater.” He hears you giggle and his heart soars at the sound. “Cater, you are one interesting person, you know.”

“Cay-Cay knows it best, cutie!”

You laugh and he smiles, happy that you didn’t berate him or call him odd. You only keep accepting and accepting him. All of him.

“Alright, I guess I can stay on call for a bit longer, since I’m already awake.”

Cater grins, humming happily. “Yay! Thank you~” As the two of you continue talking, he grips the small little bouquet of flowers in his hands. As cheesy as it is, he just hopes you’ll accept it as you keep doing with him.

Akskjdhshjs thanks for enjoying my crack idea lmao, yknow I've always been a fan of those kind of endings that give you whiplash (cough cough silent hill 2 dog ending cough) it's like, you're on the edge of your seat, paranoid about what's gonna happen next, the monster/yandere could be around any corner and god knows what the creator of the game's gonna put you through next and suddenly your faced with the most absurd situation that you couldn't have seen coming in a million years, leaving you speechless at the screen, the only thought in your mind being 👁👄👁 what,,, in the WORLD did I just witness—

Anyhow if you actually do implement it in the game, please watch out for Burnout! Considering it's the first game you're developing, it's easy to get a lot of ambition for it, which is always good, but it's also easy to underestimate the amount of work you'd need to do to implement said ideas, so it's better to finish a bare-bones playthrough first and then fleshing it out later, so you can get a rough estimate on how long a single ending would take for you to create and for players to get and thus adjusting the time you spend on certain aspects accordingly. Most importantly, make sure to take care of yourself!! and have lots of breaks, considering that staring at a screen for a prolonged amount of time causes eye strain!

-Ren'py anon

Aw thanks renpy anon! I also have been kind of- well a lot of burnt out, but I'm doing what I like and taking the time to just live life. You stay safe too!

Thanks for that bare bones playthrough reminder. I need to get one ending done and over with so I can work on the others so I dont feel so messy. I think I'm gonna ask some of my mutuals or even you (If you'd be okay sharing your non anonymous blog to me that is) to beta test it so I can get a rough estimate of time of one ending and game review.

AND FOR THE LIFE OF ME- PLEASE DONT READ MY SCRIPT UNTIL IM COMFY WITH IT BC ITS HELLA EMBARRASSING AND ITS SO MESSY 😭

I get so insecure abt someone judging my code and saying it's really bad even tho ik it's not great. I see other devs do stuff like

label yandere_branch4:

y "Blah blah I'm yandere haha."

if: I hate u

p "U suck dude."

elif: I love u too

p "Awwww k."

else: Um anyway...

p "... {w} crickets boo."

I mean this is basic renpy code but damn do I still feel intimadated. I also label my shit as random words, so I should probably change that huh.

label hallway_drunk:

... speaks for itself tbh

I feel like I spend too much time on dialogue. Idk I just have a lot of things to say 🤧

The crack ending would be AMAZING and I'd still love to somehow do something with it.

I love silent hill, but I haven't seen a playthrough yet. I've seen John Wolf play Silent hill 3 and I loved it! So I guess I should go back and retrack if he played the 2nd installment to see that whiplash ending you're talking about hehe.

The crack ending wont just be a lot of absurd/cuss words being slapped everywhere and just weird things happening lmao. I'll make it kind of climatic ig 😭

Let you go

Hi! Can i make a request? 🥺 For AOS Leonard Mccoy? With a lil bit of TOS Old Spock. Should probably set on Into Darkness, Bones and reader broke up between the event of the first and second film, so bones was a bit unbothered to flirt with Dr.Marcus (he’s trying to make reader jealous). Old spock talk them out of their misery by telling them that they’re story was quiet unique because in his timeline they didn’t even met, so they should cherish it. (Or whatever, as long as spock intervenes). They talk, and made up. And oh, fluff. Emotional tear jerking fluff. Thank you thank you!!

I have this idea (this was supposed to be a different request, but hey! ), that reader used to date and was in love with this hotshot before she met Leonard. Said ex died in action as a honored captain. Reader was devistated. Again this was supposed a different request, but you can make it as a back story. Can i make this my second request? Hehe 🥺😅

@lykxzandlove Thank you for requesting darling, and thanks for your patience, this one really faught me haha. If you recognise some of the dialogue it's from thirteen reasons why.

Warnings: ANGST ANGST ANGST. I may or may not have cried while writing this.

[[READ MORE]]

You stood in rank dressed in your grey uniform, cap framing your line of vision, shoulder to shoulder between checkov and Sulu as you gazed up at the podium where captain pike was speaking.

"Exceptional courage, is what drives us....

And our crew, is what fuels us..."

Your crew had just finished the first two year leg of your mission. A long two years...

"Let's take a moment to pay tribute to past captain's whom have made the ultimate sacrifice..." the images roll, and a firmiliar face flashed before your eyes and you suck in a breath, squeazing your eyes shut to keep your tears at bay.

You breath out carefully out of your nose, trying desperately to keep the sudden onslaught of emotions contained.

People told you time would numb it, but even give years later, the pain was still fresh and raw each and every time you heard his name, or saw his picture pop up in your records.

You gritted your teeth, struggling to ground yourself in this moment, focusing on your feet on the ground.

You blinked harshly, lifting your face and focusing your attention on captain Pike.

You don't fail to notice the doctors face turned toward you, no doubt brows mashed together over concerned eyes. The urge to meet his eyes and sink into their depths is nearly overpowers your will, but you hold strong, chin high.

------

You had never meant to fall for Leonard. You were deep in it before you even realised what was happening. You were complacent with where you were, some people go their entire lives without knowing true love, you got yours. You didn't feel the need for a new one. But there he came, blazing and true like a comment blasting across the black abyss your crew so faithfully piloted. It happened so naturally, slipping through your defences so you never noticed it.

Until it was too late, and both of you had been wounded in the process.

----

"Sweetheart?" Leonard called from behind you. You cursed silently, slowly turning to face him, trying to keep the guilt off your face as you turned to face him. "You should probably stop calling me that.." You said softly. He frowned, and not the way you liked when he was being sardonic or adorably frustrated with the captain, this one was real.

"Sorry." He said "habit. Are you alright? You left the ceremony yesterday so quickly..." you shake your head, looking away from him. "Fine, I'm fine." You said, swiftly turning and walking away from him. He frowned, looking after you, not noticing his hand was slightly extended, reaching out for you.

------

Later that day, you made your way down to the mess hall, spotting the old Ambasseter Spock, sitting alone by a window. You go through and get your food before approaching the table, greeted by a warm smile.

"Hello ambassator, " you awenered with your own. "Mind if I join you?"

"Not at all Y/N. Your company has always always been welcome." You sit down across from him. "Do tell me, how is the good doctor doing." Your fork freezes near your mouth before you set it down. "Oh, I don't know." He frowns deeply.

"I can't imagine why not." He says. "We-" your voice cracks. You clear your throat. "Were not together anymore." Suprise flits crosses his face.

"Well, now that can't be right." He says. You grimace, "I know, nothing feels right anymore, it's like reality has been tilted on its hinges, but..."

"If you don't mind me prying..." He prompts. "Go ahead, you can ask."

"What caused the separation?"

"me." You say thickly. Unexpectedly he reaches across the table and pats your hand in a grandfatherly gesture.

"And by my estimation, you do not seem satisfied with the conclusion, correct?" You hesitate before nodding. "Then mabey its time to rethink that course of action?" Your eyes widen before you look down at the table, shame radiating off of you. "I can't do that, I've already hurt him too bad, I still hurt him." You grimace, thinking of the encounter in the hallway. "I don't know how to stop hurting him." You say, more to yourself than to him.

"Then perhapse it's time to discover what is hurting you." He says. You look away into the porthole, into the black inky abyss that you sometimes wished would swallow you up.

"You know, you two are a remarkable pair." You look at him quissicly. "What makes you say that?" "In every universe I've traveled there are differences, the events in a person's life, and how they react to them, shape who they become. In every universe a different set of events happen in both of your lives, and yet every single time, one of the only constants I find are both of you coming together, no matter the space or the time nor the obstacles placed before you, the one constant is your souls coming together. And from what I can tell, it hurts your souls to be apart."

Question bubbles to your lips, but you silence it. "Ask your question, Y/N." You smile grimly. "You know me too well." "Well I've only had two lifetimes to know you."

"Where you come from... what are we like?" He smiles fondly, memories coming back to him. He sighs in a melancholy way.

"Your other self passed on just a few months ago, from a human ailement not yet curable, he blames himself for not being able to save you." Your eyes widened before blinking in shock. "Wow, thats... God how is he?" He frowns even more deeply. "Trying to go day by day, but losing someone one loves so deeply for so long... is not an easy thing to accommodate to." "Well whats.." many questions bubble to your lips at once before deciding on one. "I-Is he alone?" You ask, voice cracking. He shakes his head. "The good captain has come to earth to stay with hm, along with your daughter and grandchildren." "Joanna?" He smiles just slightly. "Well I couldn't give everything away could I?" You bark out a teary laugh and he chuckles. "But time, is so very precious my dear, you yourself told me that after your diagnosis." "Well, at least one of us has sense."

"But to thoroughly awenser your question, might I go over a timeline?" "Yes, I'd like that." You sigh, resting your head on your palm. "You met on this ship, like so many other times...."

--------

A few days later, you smooth down your hair as you look in the mirror. You were ready to come clean with Leonard about everything you've been keeping buried. Your heart thundered at the thought of unearthing the source of so much pain, but you were ready to start again with him, start fresh, open and raw, with no secrets.

You exited your quarters and went looking for him. Your fingers nervously tapped against your legs as you walked, looking for him, first going to the Med bay. Christine greeted you, her brows burrowing when you ask for him. "Oh hun, he's off planet on a mission." "Oh." You say "thank you Christine." You say before dashing off for the bridge, where you knew they'd be monitoring.

The tube doors opened up and you made your way to stand next to the captains chair, where Jim was watching. He greeted you silently with a nod, both of you listening to the audio feed coming in. You asked what they were doing, knowing he could probably hear you being so close to Jim. Jim quietly filled you in. "We found some ancient Clingon battle tech on this planet, were trying to salvage it."

"Well sweetheart, there something I can help you with?" His voice came through painfully clear, flirtatious and laying it on thick. Your heart seized and you swallowed against the lump suddenly stuck in your throat

Jim eyed you warily "Dr. McCoy may I remind you you are not there to flirt." He said in a stern voice, concerned for your feelings. Dr. Marcus' voice rang in. "We've got it, beam us up."

Once you saw him you forgot that you were surrounded by your crewmates, your hurt voice ringing out.

"You... You called her sweetheart." You said, betrayal filling you, eyes filling with tears.

Without another word you took off down the adjoining hallway, Leonard taking off after you. You sped until you were in an abandoned hallway two floors down with him still following.

Your face got hot, embarasment taking hold. You didn't want to cry over a tiny little word.

His eyes widened, regret filling them when he saw how hurt you were. "Baby- " he stopped himself. He only called you baby when he was really concerned.

"No, no I'm sorry. It's okay, Carols great, she's a great person." You forced out, turning to try and walk away. He grabbed your arm spinning you back around. "I don't want Carol. I want you. I'm sorry." You blinked. "So your not ready to move on?" He shakes his head vehidamently. "It was stupid. So stupid. I've never done anything like that in my life. I wanted to make you jealous." It felt like all the air was sucked from your lungs.

"You still want me? After evrything-" he shakes his head. "My god woman, were you listening? Yes! I love you." He breaths, gently squeezing your bicep. "But I- I hurt you! I broke up with you without giving you a reason-" "I know, sweetheart." He says Your heart stopped.

"You know?"

"I know as much as I can guess. But why don't you tell me?" You took a shuddering breath.

"So you know I was on a different ship before this one."

"Yes."

"When I went onto that ship from the academy, I came with the captain. He made it so we'd make it onto the same ship, because we were..."

"together?"

You nodded. "We loved each other. He was my captain, and I was by his side as head of security and defense tactics." He nodded, fingers pressed against his lips as he listened. "One day, we were attacked by an enemy bregade, and crash landed us on a deserted planet. In order to save me, he threw himself in front the lazer that would have incinerated me and two other crew members. They would have killed all of us, all it did was incinerate him.

After he was killed the crew, furious overpowered them, and we survived, but..." You trailed off, before looking back to him. "How did you know?"

He sighed, as if debating telling you something. "As part of protocol, a captain must... gain permission from Starfleet to enter into marriage with another crew mate. His request form was entered just a few days before his death, with your name attached." You stilled, before another wave of emotion crashed over you. A sob escaped you, and you leaned against the wall for support, a hand coming up to try to muffle your cries.

Leonard watched you with glassy eyes, your pain like a twisting knife in his chest. He waited for a moment before slowly inching forward to wrap his arms around you, testing the waters. You pull him closer, wrapping your arms tightly around him, his warmth sinking into your cold body. "I'm sorry." He whispers into your neck. "I'm so sorry." You shake your head, pressing your face into his neck. His scent calmed you, and eventually your breathing slowed as his hands rubbed your back. "I love you." You said, his hands paused, and he untangled himself to look at you, hope in his eyes. "Really?" "Yes, I'm sorry I made such a mess. Do you want to try this again?" You ask. He let out a breathless chuckle before pressing his lips to your forehead. "Yes, God yes." You smile teary eyed, bittersweet joy filling you. You placed your hands on both sides of his face before giving him a slow melting kiss, thumbs stroking his face. "I just have to do something first." You say. His brows crease slightly, but he let's you go. "Okay.." He says uuncertainly

You smile. "I'll come and see you at dinner, okay?" "Yeah, I'll see you."

---------

You entered your quarters without turning on the light, blindly reaching for your padd. It glowed brightly in the darkness of your room, easily finding the picture of him you loved the most, him dashing in his captains uniform hat just a little bit crooked, every inch of him glowing from happiness. Hot thick tears leaked from your eyes as You gently placed your padd on the table in front of your window, his face materializing against the empty black abyss, somewhere where you knew his ashes were scattered, floating forever in the universe, amidst stardust and wonder.

"I love you." You whispered into the silence, looking at him. "Wherever you are, I hope you know that I love you. I hope you know that I'll never not love you... a good friend once told me, I can love you, and still let you go.... I know one day, thinking about you won't hurt so much, and the other feelings will fade, and I'll be only left with love. The way you loved me so fiercly and how i loved you. I'll never forget you i promise, how could I? Even when I'm dying I know you'll come back to me, when I'm old and tired. But there is this amazing man that I love that wants to love me, and I think I'm ready to be happy again. I know you'd want me to be." You looked back at his flickering image

"I hope we meet again. And So, Derek.... I love you, and I let you go. And I hope wherever you are, you feel peace, you feel safe...and I hope you know that I love you." You say, a feeling of weight being stripped off of you makes you feel lighter, and a strange peace settles over you, and somehow you know he hears you.

"I'll never forget you."

Spooked

__

Simon x Fem. Reader

Warnings: Language. 

A/N: A lot of pet names in this...haha SHOCKER. Here’s a little early Halloween addition fic! I’ll have more holiday fics coming soon.

Requested by: @birdieofloxley

Word Count: 1,835

“Why would you make up something like that? You really scared me.” 

__

The legs of the chair you were sitting in squeaked as you leaned forward, tuned in to what Negan was saying. It was late October (or at least, you had estimated that it was October) meaning Halloween was soon approaching. Halloween was one of your favorite holidays as a kid. The candy, the trick or treating, the costumes were all part of the spooky experience. As you got older, you cared less about the costumes and more about the scary movies. Almost every Halloween (pre-apocalypse of course) consisted of you curling up on the sofa with a bowl of wrapped chocolate with some sort of scary movie on. 

The only downside to this was that you were a bit jumpy. It didn’t take much to get you feeling paranoid and have you checking under your bed for monsters. Which was ironic considering you literally lived in a world where there were horror movie like creatures roaming at every turn. 

So you weren’t really sure how you ended up here. Sitting with Negan and Simon outside of The Sanctuary after hours on a particularly cold night, listening to the two of them tell scary stories. Negan was recalling the time he almost became walker food when he was out on a run alone once. His voice was low and deep, his eyes fixed on yours as he spoke;

“Its hand barely had any skin left on it...it was basically all bone at that point,” He described; “For a half rotted roamer, it had a nasty grip on me though.” 

Your heart was beating crazy fast in your chest. You couldn’t even imagine how scared you’d be if that had happened to you. The fact that he was able to laugh about it now was astonishing. 

“I was able to reach my knife and just as it went to sink its teeth into my calf, I drilled the blade into its head,” He told; “I stabbed it an extra time for good measure. It took me at least a good five minutes to get it completely off of me because I was shaking so bad.” 

You were wide eyed now as you processed everything he was saying. Simon sucked in a breath before sighing it out;

“Shit. I don’t even think I’ve ever come that close to being roamer chow,” He admitted. He noticed the chill that went up your spine, prompting him to one up Negan’s story by telling his own; “You think that’s bad? Let me tell you about the time I was chased by my neighbor who was an escaped convict for murder.”

Your head snapped in his direction;

“You’re not serious.” You gaped.

Simon put his hands up in defense;

“It’s true. I swear.” He said with a hint of smirk appearing.

It wasn’t true. As excitedly terrifying as it may sound, Simon had never known any murderers or real criminals in his day. He was just making this up off the top of his head.

“You’re fucking with us. No damn way that happened.” Negan bantered.

Simon chuckled;

“You wanna hear the story or not?” He asked sassily.

You and Negan shot each other glances, before turning your attention back to Simon.

“I was about 18. Just about to go off to college,” He began; “This guy lived about three doors down and had always been a little odd. He very rarely came out of his house, but it was always dark. He had weird vibes all around. All the parents in the neighborhood wouldn’t dare let their kids go play around his house.”

You were nervously chewing on your thumb nail as you listened intently. You didn’t like the fuzzy feeling that was bubbling in your belly. 

“It wasn’t a surprise that none of us knew that he had been arrested and thrown in prison. His house was exactly the same when he wasn’t around. I felt bad for the guy. For all I knew, he was just a lonely guy with no one to talk to,” He continued; “So one day I thought it would be nice to hand deliver his morning newspaper to him. I went to the front door, knocked, but didn’t get an answer.” 

You didn’t like where this was going. You were quite literally on the edge of your seat as you took it all in. Negan himself even refrained from interrupting, curious to see how this would end.

“I heard some sort of racket in his backyard, so I walked around and through the fence. And what I saw about made me damn near sick,” He explained; “He was in his prison jumpsuit and all. And he was burying a body in his backyard.”

Your heart hit your shoes and bounced back up to your throat. Negan’s jaw dropped and his face went pale. This was the most insane story you had ever heard. 

“I was going to just make a run for it and pray to God I could forget about it. But then he saw me standing there like a deer in headlights,” He said rubbing his slightly chilled hands together; “I shit you not, the fucker dropped the shovel and started running at me.”

You were speechless. How had he never told you this story before? More importantly, how did this not traumatize him? Now Negan was just as wide eyed as you, stunned at what he was hearing. 

“I swear my feet left the ground before I could even think. I sprinted in the other direction and started screaming bloody murder...no pun intended,” He snorted; “Anyways, to make a long story short, I managed to run out of my neighborhood and found a policeman down the street. Turns out he had escaped his cell that morning and they had been on the hunt for him all day because they were afraid of what he might do. That body was some random guy that he encountered after his escape.” 

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. The hairs on your arms and legs were sticking straight up. You suddenly had the eery feeling that someone was looking at you. 

“My mom had to come pick me up from the police station. I was convinced she wasn’t going to let me go off to school after that,” He joked; “But once it was all cleared up, things turned back to normal...but I still would get a sense of fight or flight every time I visited home. But, hey, shit happens.”

Simon finished his story nonchalantly. As if he hadn’t just confessed that he had almost been chopped to bits by a psycho killer. You felt like your heart was going to make a leap of faith out of your chest. You had never heard anything like that in your entire life. Negan shook his head to shake the thought;

“You were had a life or death encounter with a serial killer and all you can say is ‘shit happens’? Simon, I may have pegged you wrong,” Negan stated; “You are one badass motherfucker.”

Simon grinned and shrugged. He had been lying, of course, but if it earned him brownie points with the boss, then he didn’t mind dragging it out. You were shocked silent. What do you even say to that? Negan smiled, shaking his story off effortlessly;

“I don’t know if I can top that, but have I ever told you two about the time I fought off a rabid raccoon?” Negan asked with a raised brow. 

Simon caught your ghostly and tired look and stood from his chair;

“No and I’d love to hear it, but I think she’s had enough storytelling for one night.” Simon said guiding you up from your chair. 

Negan shrugged with a scoff;

“Suit yourself. It’s one hell of a story though.” He said standing from his own seat.

Simon assured him of another time to tell it and finally walked you back inside from the courtyard. Simon had already completely discarded the story he had just burned into your head. He didn’t even catch the slight shiver in your limbs. You were rattled and even a little terrified. You felt like a little kid who swears they had heard a monster under their bed. Simon slipped his hand into yours as you walked back to your floor;

“So, I’ll see you in the morning, yeah?” He asked softly in your ear, careful not to wake anybody else up. 

He wasn’t going to leave you alone tonight, was he? Surely not after all that. You stopped his trek and looked at him with pleading eyes;

“Can I stay with you tonight? Please?” You asked gently; “I don’t want to be alone tonight.” You confessed.

Now, he realized something was up. He instantly agreed, leading you to his room. He watched as you quietly got ready for bed and crawled under the sheets and covers. He followed suit, pulling you to him. You latched onto him like he’d float away if you didn’t. Simon looked down at you with worried eyes;

“What’s the matter, baby?” He asked sweetly.

You buried your face into his soft shirt and shook your head. You didn’t want to admit you were scared, but you also couldn’t get the thought of being chased by a crazed killer out of your head either. He rubbed your back comfortingly and encouraged you;

“Darlin’, you can talk to me. Always.” He cooed.

You mumbled against him. He rested his chin on your head, taking in the scent of your favorite soap. His brain racked up any ideas of what was making you so fidgety. He finally thought back to the story that he had just told about a half hour prior. He suddenly felt guilty. He didn’t think it would’ve scared you this bad...especially since it wasn’t even true.

“Is it the story I told just a little while ago?” He asked.

When you nodded, he whimpered out an airy sympathetic sound. He held you tighter and admitted his lie;

“Oh, sweetheart, that didn’t actually happen. I just made it up.” 

You paused and looked up at him. The way your glossy eyes shimmered and lower lip quivered broke his heart;

“Really? You’re not just saying that?” You asked desperately.

“I promise. The whole thing was just a story.” 

Your brows furrowed, suddenly a little annoyed;

“Why would you make up something like that? You really scared me.” You said truthfully.

He kissed your forehead and hummed deeply;

“I didn’t think you’d actually believe it. You always see through my bullshit.” He grinned brightly.

You growled faintly;

“Not always. I literally thought you were serious.” 

“I’m sorry, [Y/N], I didn’t mean to.” He apologized. 

You nuzzled back into his frame, accepting his apology. You were mostly relieved that didn’t actually happen to him though. You would’ve been scarred for life. 

“That’s okay. You really could’ve been an actor, might I add.” You joked.

He scoffed, kissing your skin;

“I’ll stick to storytelling in the courtyard.” 

Day 10/May 10 - Write a paragraph of my book

If you have an essay you can write a paragraph of that instead!

I was supposed to do the sewing today and the writing yesterday, but I switched it.

I am writing a book! It's called "How To Write A Love Letter", clearly it's a romance. Teen/Middle school romance. I was supposed to complete it for NaNoWriMo but clearly, if you couldn't tell by the date, I didn't complete it.

So I wrote 444 words today! Apparently a paragraph is about 250, so I did pretty good!

The checklist said only one paragraph/250 words but that was just the minimum. Also I was feeling creative so I wrote more than was necessary, feeling pretty good!

I want to try and make this a daily/bi-weekly thing. "One paragraph per day" sound like a nice way to finish my book by next year. But I suck at estimations and don't know the amount of paragraphs in however many chapters left so it might not be that much.

I guess you can say I'm an ✨ o v e r - a c h i e v e r ✨

This and like, two other chapters are the only chapters in present-tense + first person so it was a cool experience! I don't really like writing in first person so it was a bit challenging. I naturally write in third person so I kept accidentally switching.

The scene was about the main character waking up early and walking to her friend's house before school. She passes her friend's house on accident and runs back to greet her. I ended it there, haha.

If you could give me any advice on writing this, I'd really appreciate it! Thanks!

💟start💟 🎠prev🎠 🍡next🍡

Survey #287

“keep him tied - it makes him well / he’s getting better, can’t you tell?”

What are you favorite things to watch on YouTube? I like a pretty big variety now. I’d say I’ve been mostly into pet YouTubers lately, especially reptile ones. Oh, and WoW stuff. Can you pick out any constellations in the sky without looking them up online? Besides the Little or Big Dipper (idk which is which), nope. Are you religious? If so, what influenced you to start believing God? If you’re not religious, what convinces you there is no God? I wouldn’t call myself religious, no. I do believe there’s some kind of ultimate power, but hell if I know what it is, and I don’t actually worship it. I don’t believe any “good” god would demand kissing its feet in order for you to end at peace, among a billion other reasons. I believe there is something though because the odds of life and everything is just… too perfect. Plus I believe in the paranormal, so to me, there is obviously something beyond the mortal form. Is there any animal out there that genuinely terrifies you? Is this an animal you’re worried about coming across in daily life? I am terrified of ticks and parasites in general. They’re fucking disgusting. Maggots will also make me scream. Oh, and then there’s whale sharks. In my daily life, I wouldn’t say there’s any that I actively worry about crossing paths with. When was the last time you wore make-up? Around Halloween when Summer, me, and another of her friends did a witch-themed photoshoot. It really fucking sucks that it was so dark by the time we were done that the pictures came out absolutely awful. You can’t see shit, and of course on camera, I look absolutely awful. Have you ever worn colored contacts? No, but I’m totally not opposed for a cool photoshoot. Have you seen any of the Disney re-makes (eg. Aladdin or The Lion King)? What do you think of them? I’ve seen a good number, and I really like them. I think The Jungle Book remake was the best of them. How long did it take you to pass your driving test once you started learning how to drive? Ha, I still haven’t tried. When was the last time you went out for a formal occasion or event? Do you remember what you wore? Uhhhh… I have zero clue. Well, does my last job interview count? I just wore black sweatpants and some kind of formal top. How often do you have the TV on? is it more background noise or are you actually watching things? Y’all know by now that I don’t watch TV. Do you like any songs by Elvis Presley? Well of course. “Devil In Disguise” is my favorite. Do you ever answer the phone to unknown numbers? Nope. Do you eat anything special for breakfast on Christmas Day? Nah. When you go to theme parks, what’s your favorite type of ride? I haven’t been to a theme park in beyond forever, so idk. Are you afraid of falling in love? Ohhhhh yes. Expecting something to change in the next month? No. e_e What is your biggest worry in life right now? That Mom’s cancer will come back. Well, it IS going to eventually flare somewhere else, but no one can estimate when. Could be tomorrow. Could be years. Do you give up easily? It depends. With a lot of things, honestly, yes, because I get upset with my incompetence. What are you listening to? "Going To Hell" by The Pretty Reckless just came on. Is anything bothering you right now? Always. Were you ever made fun of? Yes. Are you currently jealous? I’ve been having episodes of it. Do you find piercings attractive on the opposite sex? I find them attractive on almost all people. Who was the last person you yelled at? I don’t know. Probably Mom. What do you say a lot? “Mood,” “lmao,” “can’t relate,” “same,” “oof,” “yikes,” shit like that, haha. What is your favorite place you have traveled? Chicago. Do you like ice cream? Yeah, that’s my comfort food. Do you like bananas? Yeah, but I don’t dare to eat one if I haven’t had my heartburn medication, because otherwise I get it BADLY. Do you like Paramore? A handful of their songs, yeah. I don’t know a lot though, honestly. Do you plan on getting married? It’d be nice. Ever been given a promise ring? No. Sexual orientation? Bi. Who do you text the most? Definitely Sara. Do you still talk to the person who hurt you most in life? Why or why not? No, because he wants nothing to do with me. I don’t blame him. Have you ever given your number to a complete stranger? Um, no. Well, besides in like, job applications. What color is your keyboard? Black. Your mouse? Mostly black, but it does have this crackled pattern that can glow blue or red. Desktop or laptop? I prefer laptops for mobility’s sake. Do you like sweet tea? I hate tea. How much sugar do you put in your tea? ^ Have you ever called someone useless? Wow, no. Do you have a wood or glass dining room table? Wood. Do you tend to get attached easily? HOLY GOD OF FUCK, YES. Is Joe Jonas really hotter than Nick? I haven’t seen either in god knows how long, but I remember I thought Nick was very cute. Favorite flavor pudding? Chocolate is the only kind I’ve enjoyed. Not that I’ve tried a lot. What are three words used in your area/dialect that many other areas/dialects wouldn't be familiar with? Oh, there are most certainly some, but I can’t think of any right now. How do you feel when your partner is talking to an ex? This would depend on a lot of things. What is the most expensive gift you have ever given? Received? Given, I’m really unsure. I answer enough questions sharing that I don’t have my own source of income, so a lot of times, my mom lets me use her money, but there is obviously a ceiling to how much I can use. Received, definitely my Sager laptop Jason got me one year. Do children like you? I’m always surprised that kids seem to… I don’t know how the hell to interact with kids, but parents tend to tell me that they do like me. If you found your child's diary would you read it? What if you found the diary of one of your parents? Hell no would I read that shit. Both deserve privacy. Have you ever stalked or killed a wild animal? Fuck no. Name something you are now prepared to reveal about yourself that you weren't ready to talk about in the past? The state of my virginity. Name a talent someone has of which you are jealous: I am soooo envious of talented and actually successful photographers. What would you most likely complain about in a hotel? Probably if the bed sheets seemed dirty. Is it possible to be in love with more than one person at the same time? Probably. I’m monogamous though, so I really can’t say because I haven’t experienced this. Do you often feel pressured by others? Society, yes. Should couples live together before marriage? I feel that it’s the better decision, yes. You may not blend well actually sharing the same house. You learn things about your partner. How would you feel attending the wedding of an ex? It would depend on the person. Girt or Sara? I would love to. As a matter of fact, I better be invited lmao. Jason? I couldn’t in ten trillion years. Fiction or nonfiction. I strongly prefer fiction. Can you can lie with a straight face? Yes, if it’s something little. Name three things you have experienced that would shock your parents: Probably just sexual stuff. Do you believe in using the silent treatment? No. I’ve sure done it before, but I’d like to think I’ve grown out of this. Communication is where it’s at. Your most embarrassing thought: *shrug* Your most prejudiced thought: I don’t know. I don’t think I’m very prejudiced. A shameful moment for you: The situation w/ Joel. The biggest gamble of your life: Deciding to drop out of college the last time. Who knows if that was a good choice or not… It’s too early to tell. What is your greatest weakness as a friend? Idk off the top of my head, but I’m sure there’s something. Do you feel better when you have a tan? Nah, I like being pale. I did go through a period in HS of using tanning lotion on my legs though because I was self-conscious of JUST how pale they were. Do you sometimes enjoy being mean? ”I don’t think so. Maybe like... in certain contexts. Like being mean in video games can be really fun sometimes, haha. And being a little mean in a kink setting can be fun too.” <<<< This. Are you high maintenance? Definitely not. Has anybody ever told you that you’re too young to be in love? I think my dad has, just indirectly. Did you learn anything from the last BIG mistake you made? Yes. Do you have a favorite brand of shoes? Yeah, Converse. Do you like rollercoasters with big drops? I’m afraid of rollercoasters so have never been on one. Do you have any inside jokes with your parents? Not really. Have you ever thrown a surprise party for somebody? I don’t think so? Do you know who your mom’s favorite singer is? Oh, she’s totally obsessed with James Hetfield/Metallica. What year were you born in? 1996. What is your favorite card game? Magic: The Gathering, even though I was never great at it or totally understood all the rules. I just adore the artwork, and I like the detailed tactics behind it. Have you ever tried to surf? Nah. Do you want to learn? Nah. Have you ever had a song dedicated to you? What was it? Let’s not with this. What color eyes does your best friend have? Brown. Have you ever been on a blind date? Nah. Which one of your family members do you wish you could see more often? My brother and his son. I got really close to my nephew the last time they visited for a few days. What room in your house is the messiest? Right now, the extra bedroom that I want to make my dayroom. A lot of our “extra” stuff is just shoved into there. Have you ever requested a song on the radio? No. Are you proud of your parents? Yes. Have you ever (accidentally or not) set off a car alarm? I think I accidentally have before. Do you have dimples when you smile? Yes, way more prominently on my left cheek though. Do you find graveyards scary? No. They’re peaceful to me. Have you ever carved anything into a tree? I don’t think so. Do you read those celebrity gossip magazines? Ew, no. Celebs deserve privacy. Do you give or get advice more often? Well considering I’m in therapy, probably get. Did the last type of shoes you wore have laces? No. Do you like the picture on your license/I.D. card? FUCK no. When was the last time somebody hit on you? Idr. Which one of your friends do you feel most comfortable around? Sara. What’s your favorite Thanksgiving food? Just pass me the rolls lmao. Who did you last spoon with? My cat lmao. What was the last video game you played? I don’t recall the last console game I played, so does World of Warcraft count, even tho it’s a computer game? When you’re in trouble, do your parents ever “middle name” you? Ha, my mom will sometimes. Does getting sweaty or dirty bother you at all? If so, has it ever put you off doing exercise? Very much so. I suffer (and I DO mean “suffer”) from insane hyperhidrosis, so I sweat my ass off if I so much as twitch, if even that. I just hate feeling gross. Have you ever thought about how you want to spend your retirement? No, honestly. It’s hard for me to imagine even *getting* to retirement. Would you describe yourself as healthy? Why or why not? No. I’m physically and even more mentally not okay. Do you miss anything about being a teenager? If you are a teenager, what’s your favorite thing about it? Yeah, some things. Though I really don’t even want to think about it. I look back on me being a teen with both wistfulness as well as bitterness. I don’t know which is stronger.

The Ballads of Rebirth (Arthur Morgan x Reader)

Chapter 3: “Mrs. Morgan”

Masterlist

•••

A/N: thank you all so much for the support! This is the most I’ve ever written in three days, all three parts were written within 12 hours of the last! I’d love to hear more feedback from you guys. And btw, this story is def gonna be more like 10 chapters long haha.

•••

“I’m fine, Charles. I am, now let me go out hunting, you know I’m just as deadly with a rifle as you are with a bow.”

“I know, but we’re bow hunting, it’d be like bringing an elephant into the woods and telling it to go sneak up on someone.” Charles pushed Arthur’s chest into the bed, he fell back with a thud.

“It’s only because you’re still sick. In a couple weeks, I’ll take you out hunting with me, but until then you’re staying here.” And with that, Charles promptly walked out of the tent leaving Arthur annoyed in his bed.

Arthur hated everyone treating him like he was a baby, and he already always hated people fretting over him in general. You would have laughed at everyone’s attentiveness towards Arthur’s health, while Arthur could do little but just sit there and look pretty.

He missed you more and more everyday, Charles and Mahala could see the longing for you in his eyes, it was heartbreaking to watch. Mahala knew nothing of you, Arthur’s past was a mystery, but by the way Arthur spoke she knew he was missing his other half, like a record player that could not play any music.

Even if he missed you, Arthur promised himself he wouldn’t search for you until he was better, which could take many more months.

Mahala estimated it would take around three more months to fully recover if he didn’t relapse. In three more months you could be on the opposite side of the country, it would take so much longer to find you. But he eventually would, he would begin that journey when he was ready.

Arthur was slowly gaining weight if he were to prepare for his journey he would need to first maintain a decent weight. His fevers left him with little appetite but Mahala had kept him on a reliable diet that he could usually keep down. Rabbit that Charles hunted, wheat bread and carrots and peppers. Mahala was a good cook, so Arthur never got bored of his daily food.

It was early in the morning, Mahala usually brought his breakfast in at nine, but she always visited before that. She’d tell him stories of her youth which were surprisingly interesting,her stories were the only thing keeping Arthur sane. He never liked sitting around and being lazy like Uncle, but listening to a story wasn’t exactly just sitting around. Mahala had lots of stories, fables and legends, it always kept him intrigued.

When seven rolled around, and Charles had long been gone, Arthur could hear Mahala’s cheerful humming from outside the tent.

“Rise and shine, my son.” She said, ripping open the tents opening.

“G’morning Mahala. Sleep well?” Arthur mumbled, attempting to sound sleepy. Mahala always got angry when Arthur didn’t sleep in, since he rarely ever slept and if he did it was for very short periods of time.

Mahala gave Arthur a knowing look, turning away from him. She pulled a small vial out of her bag, Arthur groaned. Medicine.

“It’s your favorite,” she said in a sing songy voice, putting some on a spoon. Arthur grabbed the spoon from her nimble hands. He shoved the spoon in his mouth. It was bitter and awful and he nearly choked on it every time.

“Swallow it.” She said sternly, glaring at him. He obliged and felt the viscous liquid fall down his throat. It was his least favorite part of Mahala’s visits, minus the coughing fits and fevers.

She sat down next to Arthur’s bed, setting her bag down next to her. Glass vials clinked in her leather bag, it was old and worn and held lots of medicine for Arthur. He wasn’t sure what he took everyday, never bothering to ask, even if he did, he wouldn’t understand it. It was some sort of herbal mixture, but tasted like it was left out in the sun for hours and had turned rancid.

“Today I want to hear a story from you.” Mahala began after she noticed Arthur had drank the medicine.

It felt like the air had been sucked from his lungs, something he had unfortunately become accompanied with in the last few months. She had never asked of his past. He hadn’t even prepared an answer, expecting . Even if he knew he would never lie to Mahala, knowing she could see through it instantly, he could still avoid the full truth.

“A story about me?” He asked with a light chuckle, sitting up. Mahala nodded.

“Well I’m not that interesting. I ain’t got much to tell.”

“I’m sure you’ll think of something.” She told him.

He thought for a moment, deciding what was the safest to tell, interesting but not risky. She eyed the small gold band on his finger, the only thing besides Charles that anchored him to his past.

“Tell me about her.”

“You wanna know about Mrs. Morgan?”

“Yes. You’ve never spoken of her. Was she dull? Is that why you’ve never talked about her?” Mahala tilted her head in humorous curiosity.

“No, no, she’s far from dull.” He laughed, shaking his head. A small smile splayed on Mahala’s lips.

“She was wonderful, kind and beautiful. A compassionate heart, but boy, if you got her mad you’d better be praying.” Mahala listened to every word he said.

“Once.. once I’d forgotten to lay my socks out to dry and gotten sick from it, she didn’t let me rest for one minute. She was fuming, but she still kept care of me.” It had been years ago, long before either of you had confessed your feelings but he remembered it like it was yesterday. It felt good to speak about you, like a large weight had been pulled off of his chest. He felt lighter.

Mahala laughed at the story, she had never been married, claiming a man could not handle her ideas. A pang of happiness struck her heart, Arthur was like her son, and to see him be open and smile around her was wonderful, but she could still tell he was keeping the full truth from her.

“It seems like she was good for you.”

“Yeah, I think she is.”

“My, my child. Is she alive or dead? You speak of her in different pretenses, I cannot tell.” Mahala, ever the curious cat was incredibly broad, perhaps too broad for her own good.

Arthur let out a heavy sigh, not realizing he’d been holding it in this entire conversation.

“I’m not too sure to be honest. We got separated a few days before Charles found me, Charles doesn’t seem to know where she went. She could be halfway across the country or six feet in the ground by now.”

Mahala pursed her lips tightly.

“You’ll find her, lovers always find a way back to each other.”

“Don’t give me that sappy stuff, Mahala. The world don’t work like that.”

“Believe what you will, but I’m sure you’ll find her. I can see the love in your eyes for her.”

Arthur had heard that from Hosea on the night he proposed to you, after you had gone to bed for the evening and Arthur was still up drinking with the few men who were still awake in celebration. It was right before everything went to shit, and the entire gang was forced out of Blackwater. It was only him, Hosea, Dutch and John who were awake, the true Van der Linde family, the only missing piece was you. Drunk Arthur didn’t remember much of the rest of the night besides that one comment.

“I see your love for her in your eyes. They twinkle more, it’s like you’re finally seeing the bigger picture. A love like that can’t be broken by death, and god knows death comes quickly and often in this life.”

•••

“Lee, can you pick that up for me?” You pointed towards a can of green beans that had fallen down, since you were at the cash register helping a rather moody customer.

“Yes, Ma’am.” He picked up the green beans, and instantly returned to restocking. Lee had been acting strange all day, he avoided your eye and spoke to you only when talked to first. It wasn’t like him at all. You were sure it had something to do with your kiss on the cheek last night. You smiled at the thought of him becoming weak at just a peck on the cheek, it was how Arthur used to be as well at the beginning of your relationship.

Today had been awful, two customers had yelled at you for running out of items and one, you realized later, had stolen multiple cans of food. The general store was already hurting after a newer one had been put up. It was a chain store, so everyone wanted to go see what all the fuss was about. You hadn’t told Lee about the crook who took the food, and you were still deciding if you were going to. You had stolen food countless times while in the gang, it felt so much worse when you were on the opposing end.

When the shop finally closed, it was just you and Lee again. He was still nervous to be around you, moving to the opposite side of the room to ‘sweep’ when you moved closer to him.

Around ten minutes after being closed, he cleared his throat. You look up at him, putting the money you were counting on the glass shelf.

He stared at you with big brown eyes.

“Can I take you on a date, Mrs. Morgan?” Lee asked you with sudden confidence.

You froze for a moment, you eyes staring off at the window behind him. For a second, you thought you saw Arthur, standing there behind Lee.

“I’ll take you down to the restaurant, the one that just opened by the pier,” Lee’s sudden confidence was destroyed by your silence.

You liked him well enough, but were you really ready for that type of commitment again? Arthur was barely dead, you had mourned for him while he was living, since he had pushed you away as soon as he got sick. It was like he was a ghost the minute he had found out about his diagnosis. Arthur did his damn best to make sure you made it out okay, even if it meant pushing you away to keep you safe. Your biggest regret was not staying with him through it all, no matter his protests.

“I’d love to go with you.”

You could finally let go of Arthur, the final thing holding you back. He would have wanted you to move on, to see you happy.

And you were happy right now, you felt contempt with your life for the first time in a long time.

•••

902

Do you still think of that Gwen Stefani song when you spell bananas? If I had to spell the word I definitely would sing it the way she did; just the kid in me lol. But if I only read the word somewhere or see a bowl of bananas, I normally would not think of the song. Do you like the way your hair naturally is, or do you change it? I really love that I took the risk of having my hair cut all the way up to my neck and getting bangs along with it, which doesn’t sound too crazy but it’s the biggest thing I’ve done to my hair in 22 years. I think having my hair trimmed is all I’m willing to do though; I don’t think I’d be eager to get an undercut or have my hair bleached or shave everything off. Do you know anyone who died accidentally by doing something stupid? I’ve read accounts of other people that I don’t know; but I don’t know anyone personally, I think. How many different languages have you taken in school? I didn’t need to take language electives both in high school and college. But if I had been required I would’ve signed up for Italian, Spanish, or Korean. How old will you be on your next birthday? 23.

How tall is your father? (Estimate?) He’s around 5′6″. I have cousins taller than him, hahaha. If your cell phone broke, would your parents make you pay for a new one? They definitely would, at this point. And they should make me pay; I’d be mad at them if they’re still willing to pay at the age I’m in now. I’m no longer entirely under their wings once I graduate on the 26th, so a new phone would be one of the things they no longer have to pay for. If you died tomorrow, would you be missing out on any big plans you’ve made? Yes. I would have wanted to get married and have kids, and to achieve my only big life goal that didn’t fall under tradition which was to go to Wrestlemania 50.   If you woke up and no one was home, would you wonder where everyone is? Yes, that would be very odd in the situation we’re in now. My parents being gone I could understand; but my siblings have no reason to be going out. Are your parents still married? Yes, they are. It’s easy to count how many years they’ve been married because their wedding was only a year before I was born, so I just do +1 to my present age hahaha. Are you in a monogamous relationship? I am. ‘S the only kind of relationship I want to be in. Are your legs crossed right now? Yups. I recently changed my legs’ position to have them crossed, actually. Have you ever met your favorite band? I haven’t, though I’ve gotten close enough to touch them if I wanted to and Hayley has even looked straight into my camera a few times. I would’ve met the band if I had volunteered to be the fan who gets to climb up the stage and sing Misery Business with Hayley, but I’m just way too anxious for that. I was the only person in the front row not raising my hand for her to notice hahahaha Have you ever drawn on someone's face while they were sleeping? No. I’d be mad if someone did that to me so I don’t do it to other people. Have you ever fallen down a hill? Ugh god, this reminds me of the tripping scene in Midsommar. But no I haven’t. Would you scuba dive in shark infested waters if you had the chance? Nope, not even if I had a battalion of trained professionals with me. It’s not that I hate sharks, it’s just that I doubt I’d be able to compose myself once I’m in the water and that I’ll give in to anxiety. I’m sure the sharks would only be all the more attracted to me once I start panicking and flailing my arms underwater. Would you dress up as Spiderman and run down the streets? I’ve seen people done that before actually hahaha. I’m not extroverted enough to do that; I’d rather watch others do it and be more entertaining than I ever could be. Would you meet Miley Cyrus if you had the chance? If I had the chance and it was free, yeah probably. I don’t idolize her as much as I do Hayley Williams or Beyoncé so I think I’d be more chill with her. What color are your fingernails? My nails have been bare for years now. What time will it be in three hours and ten minutes? 11:52 AM. What is your favorite slow song? Turning Page - Sleeping At Last Do you believe in karma? I don’t always take it seriously, but it can be satisfying when it happens. Do you still talk to the last person you kissed? I do. Do you constantly check your cellphone? There are times I do. How long have you been living in the state that you're in now? In my province, 20 or 21 years, not exactly sure when my parents made the move. How many tabs/windows are open on your computer right now? I have nine tabs on my current window; I have two other windows. How often do you eat cereal for breakfast? I only ever do so when we’re staying at hotels. I’d say a few times every few months. Not really a big fan of food that can get that mushy. If there were aliens on earth, would you be afraid? It’d depend on how they are. I’d be fascinated either way, though. If your best friend died, would you be able to speak at their funeral? Yeah, I would want to. If you could spend 1 hour 20 years in the future, would you? Easiest yes ever. Are there any paintings on your living room walls? I mean they’re meant to look like paintings but they’re generic wall decors to give the room more color. Are your pets asleep? Cooper just started to lie down but he isn’t asleep. Kimi has his head up at the moment. Are you excited for anything right now? What? No. Been more depressed than excited lately, ugughgnhhgh. We’re having a virtual graduation on Sunday and I’m not even thinking of going. Just sucks that it had to be my batch who got affected by this whole shitshow.   Have you ever wished you were an only child? Up until I was a teenager, sure. Having siblings doesn’t bother me as much anymore now. Have you ever hurt someone on purpose? Like, physically? Only my siblings when we would wrestle as kids. Not as a grownup. Have you ever gotten hurt while sledding? I’ve never gone sledding.

Would you dye your hair hot pink for $400? Yep. $400 or roughly ₱20,000 is already a lot of money where I live. Would you go a year without wearing a bra for $100,000? That’s literally the easiest dare ever. I don’t get to wear a bra AND I get paid for it? Sweet. What kind of cell phone do you have? iPhone. What do your pants look like? Not wearing a pair right now. What is your current favorite song? no song without you - HONNE Did you notice the pattern in this survey? :) I didn’t until you pointed it out. I’m a sucker for organization, so I’m pleased with what I saw haha.

[IDOLiSH7] DUSK TiLL DAWN (Story Translation)

*Note: This is a Chinese-to-English translation using the official Chinese translation from the TW server! There’s a small chance that some phrases may differ slightly from the original Japanese text due to different wording and localisation, but overall there shouldn’t be too much of a difference so probably nothing to worry too much about xD

CHARACTERS: Iori: Io Yamato: Yamarson Mitsuki: Mick Tamaki: Tamathony Sogo: Somas Nagi: Nagistopher Riku: Rictor

(I will include the characters’ names in brackets even if they haven’t revealed their names yet, because it would just be too confusing otherwise. I recommend having the game story open as you read so you get a better feel of the characters’ actions and expressions, since I won’t be indicating them here ^^)

---

STAGE 1

17:00

??? (Nagistopher): This is Handsome here. We’ve arrived at Central Boulevard. Over.

<BUZZ>

Radio noise (Tamathony): This is Sugar here. Confirmed to have arrived at Central Boulevard. Estimated about 5000 feet from the goal Central General Hospital. The fastest route is to rush over there in one shot. Over~

<BUZZ>

??? (Mick): Uh, this is Patissier. You want us to rush through this place? What nonsense are you saying? Their numbers are increasing.

??? (Nagistopher): The path is pretty wide, so we won’t be surrounded. We can avoid them.

??? (Mick): Well that may be true…

<BUZZ>

Radio noise (Tamathony): If Patissier isn’t willing, another route would be to go down the manhole cover and through the sewers. It’s just that this route stinks and is dirty. I don’t mind either way~

??? (Mick): This is totally a cruel choice between two! Say, how could you speak like that to your seniors!

??? (Nagistopher): Mick, quiet.

<ROAR>

<CLICK>

??? (Nagistopher): There are regular civilians being attacked up ahead.

Mick: Our mission doesn’t include rescuing regular civilians?

??? (Nagistopher): I’m going over.

Mick: Ah, Captain!!

17:30

<BAM BAM BAM>

Mick: Hey! Are you guys okay!?

??? (Yamarson): Huff, huff… W-We’re saved…

??? (Somas): Huff, huff… Haha… hahahaha! That was so cool just then!! I vigorously jumped from the top of a car, and then Yamarson forcefully threw the rock! Hahaha!

??? (Yamarson): Wh-Why are you so happy!? (Has this person’s brain broken…)

??? (Somas): Perfectly hit the target! Hehe.

??? (Yamarson): What is wrong with those guys…! Spare me…

??? (Nagistopher): … Seems like you guys are okay.

Mick: Uh, umm… they do seem okay. But one of them is laughing hysterically… He’s okay, right…? Uh~ You guys aren’t hurt, right…?

??? (Yamarson): Mm, you guys saved our lives! When they surrounded us, I thought it was over…

??? (Somas): Thank you!

??? (Yamarson): Are you guys a rescue team?

Mick: No, we’re “I.DOL.”

??? (Somas): “I.DOL” is that special forces unit…

??? (Nagistopher): This is Handsome. We’ve protected the two civilians. Requesting rescue. Over.

<BUZZ>

Radio noise (Tamathony): Roger. Arranging a rescue helicopter. Over~

Mick: Okay, the helicopter will be here soon. You guys go wait somewhere safe…

??? (Nagistopher): Mick, before that, let’s finish cleaning up here.

<CLICK>

<ROAR>

Mick: Oi… how many are there.

??? (Yamarson): Eee…!

??? (Somas): Ah, it’s a sign head!

Mick: You guys stay back a bit. I’ll get rid of them immediately!

??? (Nagistopher): Mick.

Mick: Understood!

<CLINK>

Mick: I’m gonna throw it!

<BAM>

18:00

<BAM BAM BAM>

??? (Nagistopher): … Finished driving them out.

Mick: Alright! Everything’s fine!

??? (Yamarson): What exactly has happened? What was that monster?

??? (Somas): Were they zombies!? They were zombies, right?

Mick: W-Wait, calm down!

??? (Somas): I saw it with my own eyes, there were people collapsed on the ground turning into those monsters…!! Everything around them was absorbed, sucked inside… Ah, if that monster was a zombie, would one be infected if they were bitten? Wow~ I really wanna know!!

??? (Yamarson): Oi oi oi… what zombies, this isn’t a joke! You guys should know something, right!? Hurry up and tell us!

Mick: C-Calm down…!

??? (Yamarson): We were attacked just now!? How do you expect me to be calm!

??? (Nagistopher): … That’s top secret.

??? (Yamarson): Why! That’s too weird!

Mick: W-Wait!

<BUZZ>

Radio noise (Tamathony): Oh no, Captain Handsome! I just called for a rescue helicopter, but no one responded~

??? (Nagistopher): Sugar, what’s going on?

<BUZZ>

Radio noise (Tamathony): I also sent an emergency message to other units, but couldn’t get in touch with any of them. Things are looking pretty bad. What do we do?

<BUZZ>

Mick: … Is this for real.

??? (Nagistopher): … I’ll bring these two people over.

Mick: C-Captain…! You mean to bring them over?

??? (Nagistopher): This is to protect their lives.

Mick: Sigh… understood!

??? (Yamarson): Wh-What are you guys saying? The rescue helicopter is coming, right?

Mick: Sorry, things have changed. We’re going to have to ask you guys to move with us.

??? (Yamarson): What!? What exactly is going on!

Mick: We need to head to the Central General Hospital up ahead. For now, we’re going to have to ask you guys to head over there with us. Once we get there, we should meet a rescue unit.

??? (Somas): Central General Hospital… E-Excuse me, I have a friend there! He’ll be okay, right?

Mick: I don’t know, but if we see him, we’ll protect him. But please understand, we place our mission as top priority.

??? (Yamarson): W-Wait a moment. Before that, you guys should explain the current situation!

??? (Somas): Yeah! What were those monsters before? They really are zombies, right?

??? (Yamarson): … Tell us, and we’ll obediently follow you.

??? (Nagistopher): … Understood.

Mick: Captain…

??? (Nagistopher): He’s right, if we want them to move with us, it’d be better to first tell them the situation.

??? (Somas): Yay!

??? (Nagistopher): Mick, if you please.

Mick: … Alright, since they’ll find out sooner or later… You’re right, those were so-called zombies.

??? (Somas): I was right!!

Mick: The zombies you saw just before, we call them Gathereds. They’re a phenomenon caused by being infected by a certain virus.

??? (Somas): Gathereds… virus…

Mick: If their blood, saliva, or other bodily fluids enter your body, you’ll be infected. You can’t be bitten or scratched, either.

??? (Yamarson): …

Mick: A healthy person who gets infected will probably have an outbreak within half a day.

??? (Somas): So cool…! So there really are zombies in this world! It’s just like a movie!

??? (Yamarson): Is this for real…

Mick: That’s how it is in simple terms. Oh right, what are your names?

Somas: I’m Somas!

Yamarson: … I’m Yamarson.

Mick: Okay, Yamarson, Somas. I belong to the special forces unit “I.DOL,” my name’s Mick. He’s Captain Nagistopher.

Nagistopher: Nice to meet you.

Mick: Somas, are you a student? Have you ever held a gun?

Somas: Yes. I’ve only held a gun once during shooting training…!

Mick: Then you take this. You know how to use a pistol, right?

Somas: O-Okay!

Nagistopher: You take this.

Yamarson: … I don’t get a gun?

Mick: Giving you guys weapons is just in case of emergency.

<CLICK>

Yamarson: Eh!?

<BAM BAM BAM>

<ROAR>

Yamarson: Ah…!?

Somas: When did they…!

Mick: We’ll be in charge of battle. You guys just take care of your own lives.

Somas: I-I understand.

Nagistopher: Then let’s go.

Mick: Ah, oh right oh right. Forgot to ask you guys something important… You two weren’t bitten or scratched, right?

---

STAGE 1  |  Stage 2  |  Stage 3  |  Stage 4  |  Stage 5

---

Follow me on Twitter for more IDOLiSH7 fangirling! ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡

questions tag!

@fangoddess817​ tagged me, hehe i have nothing to do so thank you :’)

Rules: answer 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you want to know better 

Nickname: cait (short form of my first name), desiree or more commonly desire (to annoy me, i don’t rly like my middle name lmao), i would also respond to ‘HAHAHA’

Gender: female

Zodiac: gemini

Height: 168cm, but i’ve grown a bit so that’s like a rough estimate lol

Age: 16

Time: 3pm

Favourite band/artist:  - seventeen - stray kids - nct (all units pls they’re my babies despite everyone being older) - monsta x - got7 - iKON - exo

Song stuck in my head: missed connections by dk, it’s an ost and itS SO SO GOOD I CRY EVERYTIME IT COMES ON :(

Last movie I saw: mission impossible- fallout

Last thing I googled: oh my lyrics (i wanted to bujo the hangul words for ohmy)

Other blogs: none :’)

Do I get asks: nope, i have one mutual only HAHA

Why I chose this username: solilogyu, gyu comes from mingyu who’s probably my ultimate bias and soliloquy is a fancy ass words that i learned from lit in school,,, gyu and quy sound the same so,,, here birthed solilogyu

Following: 11

Amount of sleep I get: 8/9 hours but despite it being a long time, i sleep at 4/5am and thats rlly bad so i need to work on that asap

Lucky Number: 8!! it’s the day i was born on and has always been a number that’s been good to me

What I’m Wearing: an oversized t shirt because comfort >

Dream Job: performing in a band, i have a passion for music and i’d really love to write music about my experiences/emotions and perform it with people who share the same love for music :)

Favourite Foods: uh, spaghetti, hokkien char (so underrated pls), FISH- salmon specifically, literally ANY malaysian food except for a few like laksa/hokkien mee,, i just love food honestly i would become a food critic just to eat

Instruments: piano, bass, guitar, a bit of drums

Sports: tennis, swimming, (volleyball/netball/cricket/basketball/anything with balls bc our pe department was rly pushing us to be the best @ sports but all we ever did was,, laugh lmao)

Hair colour: originally my hair is dark brown, but i dip dyed it red so now it’s kinda dark brown fading into a mess of red, pink, orange and streaks of blonde LMAO

Eye colour: poopy brown

Most iconic song: tbh i think shine by pentagon is a whole bop that was slept on by everyone including me LMAO, i will never not dance to it when it comes on shuffle

Languages I speak/learn: english, malay (even though i suck at it), chinese (i dropped it but i can count to 10!!), korean (only like phrases they repeat in kdramas or yknow,, interviews,, i just picked up a bit HAH), crackhead language (etc NOEWICEOMIXM in response to OWEIMCWOIME)

Random fact: i don’t think i care about what others think too much,, i will fall on my knees laughing or doing something embarassing in public i’m just, i have no shame lol

Describe yourself as aesthetic things: what counts as ‘aesthetic’? if these do, fairy lights, messy BUT comfy bedsheets, night views where all you see is a variation of lights + photographer aesthetic if that exists lmao

Favourite songs: welp here goes nothing, insomnia, you are, get it, bad, love scenario, boss, bad boy, been through, lotto, silver spoon, pinwheel, stuck, loser, never 

ARTIST SIGN-UPS ARE OPEN!

Hello, lovely artists! Below are 25 blind summaries for the various fics we have, which means there are 25 slots. They are first-come, first-served, so when you sign up, please list the three fics you’d like the most. I’ll do my best to make sure that you get matched with at least one of your three, but if that doesn’t happen for whatever reason, I’ll message you and we’ll figure something out. 

The link to sign up is here:

https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfvFYmasupxZr95CR6Tw_xvYZgHz9FWEg09ILA-D3AKChbmCQ/viewform

A couple of things to note: you’ll notice some of the numbers are missing (7, 8, 15, 19). I’m still waiting to for the summaries from these writers, and I’ll post updated lists with those summaries as I get them (and I’ll also be updating with which fics are already taken). 

Also, some of the fics are long. I lifted the word max because we didn’t have a problem last time of people committing to huge long fics and not coming through. In fact, a couple of the writers chose to only upload the first few parts/chapters of their long fics for the big bang, and have continued to update the stories themselves afterward with subsequent chapters (one is still going strong and it’s pretty great). As the artist, it’s totally up to your discretion what you make art for in the fic. You can read the first few lines and find the perfect imagery, or you can read the whole thing and decided to animate it. Both work, so don’t let word counts scare you away. 

Artist sign-ups are open until 10/13/17 (Oct. 13th).

SUMMARIES

1

Pairings: Kepcobi, implied Lovelace/Rachel 

Rating: T Word count: 3000 - 4000 

Summary: 1. rachel young checks her emails. your emails. you check your emails- how is special projects doing, rachel? how do you feel about these proposed staffing changes in your department? 

2. you, warren kepler, have a meeting. you seem to have meetings like this very, very often. it's almost familiar, the sight of jacobi sat across the desk from you. 

3. alana maxwell has a brief crisis in the lab, after an incident involving a timer lock and an ai's bid for freedom, but you're calmed down by none other than- 

4. you, mr jacobi, reflect on your job, your life, and the next hephaestus crew (who you saw just down the hall). 

5. you make sure things run smoothly, don't you, mr cutter? make sure everything is in its place. as ever-

2

Pairings: Kepler/Jacobi, possibly other background 

Rating: T/M 

Word count: 3000 - 5000 

Summary: a look at a developing personal and working relationship between Jacobi and Kepler (Content warnings: general violence, potentially some domestic, and possessive behavior) 

Note to artists: I can't listen to podfics so I would prefer not to receive any (I wanna be able to interact with your art!)

3

Characters: Kepler, Jacobi (there's no real pairing, like the fic isn't written shippy, but you could probably read it as pre-slash) 

Rating: T Word Count: ~2000 

Summary: Kepler and Jacobi get captured and tortured for information. Kepler is getting real real hurt, so Jacobi agrees to tell them what they want to know. Kepler experiences Emotions abt the facts that a) Jacobi no don't TELL them the INTEL, b) he's more loyal to me than to Goddard i can Use This, and c) awww he doesn't want me to get hurt c:

4

Pairings: Kepcobi, Jacobi & Maxwell 

R: T+ 

Word count: ~1500 

Summary: they say that in the moments before you die, your life flashes behind your eyes. (maxwell lives au)

5

Pairings: Minkowski/Lovelace, Eiffel/Hera 

Rating: T 

Word count: 5000 - 10k 

Summary: Minkowski has two months back on Earth under her belt, and she’s got everything totally under control. They’ve got a begrudging ally running interference with Goddard, a Mack truck for Hera’s brain, and a safe-house waiting for them in California. Her only problem is the baby.  Also; Maxwell’s legacy, a little equality act, the mere thought of word games, oddly competent French braids, disgusting tea, super durable babies, and the validity of gas station condoms.

6

Characters: Original crew (maybe +Lovelace) 

Rating: G 

Word count: ~1000 

Summary: planning a psychic au in the vein of each individual thinking themselves unique in their ability, as the telepathic element leads into a lot more early discoveries in the hephaestus. 

9

Characters: Maxwell & Jacobi

Rating: T

Word count: ~6000

Summary: Maxwell and Jacobi reflect on their relationship with Kepler, both the brightest and darkest moments of life with the Colonel. (warning that Kepler's penchant for "discipline" (abuse) will come up)

10

Pairings: Minkowski & Eiffel (friendship/implied) 

Rating: G 

Word count: 500 - 1000 

Summary: After being back on earth for a few months, Minkowski has a job offer for Eiffel, Eiffel builds a giant radio in his backyard, drinks and memories are shared in front of a ratty old sofa.

11

Pairings: Kepcobi, Minlace, (reference to Kepler/Cutter) 

Rating: M 

Word count: 15k +, estimated 10 chapters 

Summary: running a business is hell. running hell is just business. [vague spn (supernatural) au ft. hephaestus hunters vs the demons at goddard futuristics]

12

Characters: Hera & Maxwell 

Rating: T 

Word count: 1000 - 1500 

Summary: When Hilbert took Hera offline, the crew fell apart and it is safe to say that they did everything in their power to help her. When Dr. Maxwell discovered the malicious code implanted in Hera's memory banks, she did all she could to help Hera overcome that nagging little phrase. It is safe to say that without Hera the crew of the Hephaestus would be missing something vital. This includes Dr. Alana Maxwell. So, what if while Maxwell was helping Hera overcome her demons, Maxwell overcame some of her own? What if a deeper friendship was born?

13

Pairings: Kepcobi, (Jacobi, Kepler, Maxwell, possibly also Rachel or Cutter) 

Rating: M for violence 

 Word count: 10K 

Summary: Kepler and Jacobi are rival assassins.

14

Characters: Maxwell and supporting cast. 

Rating: G or T.   

Word count: 5000 

Summary: Five guns Maxwell fired, plus one she didn’t. 5+1 character study of Dr. Alana Maxwell and her mad rifling skills. 

16

Pairings: Kepler/Jacobi 

Rating: M, warnings for major character death. 

 Word count: 4500 

Summary: Pre-hephaestus SI5 mission, Kepler dies and Jacobi kind of goes ballistic (haha).

17

Pairings: Kepcobi 

Rating: M 

Word count: 35k (only first few chapters will be used for Big Bang) 

Summary: The last thing Jacobi wants to do with his summer is spend a week of it trapped in a car with Kepler (and Maxwell, but she’s more tolerable. She is supposed to be his best friend after all). He hates the way he can’t look away from him, hates the way Kepler can suck him in with a raised eyebrow and a half smile, hates the way that one glance leaves his heart pounding and his hands shaking. It’s like he’s not even trying. He especially hates it when Kepler somehow contracts a very deadly, very inconvenient disease that might kill him before they ever reach California-one that might not be an accident.

18

Pairings: possible Minlace, otherwise general S4 Hephaestus crew 

Rating: G/T 

Word count: 5000 - 10k 

Summary: Episode-style fic. The crew discover that the Hephaestus is on course to intercept a comet's tail. Minkowski makes a mistake that puts the station at risk, and everyone struggles to deal with the consequences. Also to survive. 

20

Pairings: Minlace 

Rating: T, with potential M 

Word count: 30k 

Summary: A post-Hephaestus minlace fake dating au. The two of them made it back with Eiffel and Hera in tow, but things are not easy when you're filing a lawsuit against Goddard Futuristics and there are cameras everywhere you go and a reporter just asked you how you and Captain Lovelace started dating.

21

Pairing: Doug Eiffel/Mr. Koudelka/Renée Minkowski 

Rating: T 

Word count: ~12k 

Summary: Doug fucks up, Minkowski stresses, Koudelka smacks some sense into both of them. (After Eiffel drunk-dials Minkowski in the dead of night and says some things he shouldn't, Minkowski arrives to break down his door and talk some sense into him. She doesn't do so well. Her husband does significantly better.)

22

Characters: Hilbert, Hera, Minkowski, Eiffel 

Rating: G 

Word count: 1000 - 2000 

Summary: It's the end of the first week of the mission, and everything is going....alright? Eiffel has been rather resigned, unsure of himself really, and Hilbert has been giving everyone the cold shoulder. The AI system (Hera right?) doesn't talk much besides when spoken to, but when she does she says some strange things. But Minkowski knows that the crew can come together, and what better way than a game night? 

23

Pairing: Lovelace/Minkowski/Koudelka, Jacobi/Eiffel, Jacobi & Maxwell 

Rating: M 

Word count: 10k 

Summary: Isabel Lovelace learns a secret, finds some truth, falls in love, and creates a family and saves the world. Roughly in that order.

24

Pairings: Kepcobi (hinted) 

Rating: T

Word count: 2000 max 

Summary: In the aftermath of a mutiny, Maxwell and Kepler sit together in the observation deck. They talk about the friends they've lost. (essentially, What If Jacobi Died Instead Of Maxwell)

25

Pairings: Kepcobi, Maxwell/Long-suffering patience 

Ratings: T (potentially M) 

Word count: ~6000 

Summary: Stranded in Kyoto, Kepler emphatically suggests Jacobi take tea ceremony lessons to "give him a sense of calm" (and also keep him out of Kepler's hair while he tries to figure out an extraction). Maxwell can't stop laughing. Jacobi can't stop knocking over tea cups. Kepler can't stop almost getting murdered at the vending machine down the road.

Shit said in my AP Calculus class

T: “There it is.”

“Jump disc.”

“Your life is an asymptote.”

“What does that mean?” “Your mom.” “Thank you.”

“Is there a hole?!”

“Stop fisting each other!”

“The David Copperfield Theorem.“

“Oh my Goddd. I’m saying oh my god because I just realized that parallel lines have the same slope.”

“🎵Operator pleeease🎵”

“Nicholas where do I go from here?”

“Confetti.”

“This is like Math Debate 101”

“Consult yourself before asking me!”

“That’s a 2.” “Oh my God, I’m an idiot.” “We all knew that.”

“Lo d'hi less hi d'lo o lo squared🎵”

“Fusion is just a cheap tactic to make weak students smarter.”

“I’m gonna cry.”

“Wait, did I do something stupid?”

“I thought I was on a roll. Oh wait, I’m on a roll again.”

“It’s 7!”

“Es como una cebolla.”

“C E B O L L A”

“Ughh, this one is giving me diarrhea.” “Me too … which one?” “G(x) of that.” “Saaame.”

“Just like onions, composite functions make me cry.”

“Nooo, but the second one is different!”

“Waiii, Ms Raaayymoss!!!”

T: “This *rapid hand shaking* means anxiety

“I would’ve been right, but I did it wrong.”

T: “I hate everyone in this room.”

“That’s gonna be my senior quote: ‘This, parenthesis school parenthesis, kills the man.’”

T: “Close my door! … Thank you!”

“Did you know that you can stop it (the announcements)? You just throw a hammer at it.”

*scattered depressed yays*

T: “I’m gonna start teaching now, thanks.”

“Sin minus what in the hell ”

“Is it that y minus crap?”

T: “Cool, someone left their eraser, it’s mine now.”

“Ms, if I give you a quote, you’ll say it’s cheesy.” T: “Oh my god, are you still sensitive about that??” “Yes I’m still sensitive about that!”

“I did that once, she didn’t notice.” “Wait, do what?” “Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you dying, more like, are you deading?”

T: *writing the answer on the board, which is -2cot(sinθ)csc^2(sinθ)cosθ* “That’s the alphabet.”

“That looks easy. Probably isn’t, but the illusion of easy is still there.”

“I don’t think it’s that hot. You’re all ugly. ... Are you gonna quote me?”

T: “Let’s try a more complicated problem.” “FNAF Sister Location.”

“WAII, IS THAT THE ANSWER? IS THE ANSWER THE QUESTION??” “We did it! THIS IS THE ULTIMATE ONION!”

“I dunno, I farted I guess”

T: “But you have no 3x here.” “...” “BOY, U THOT!” “Yeah, I thought.”

T: “If I could find your derivative, then I could be the one over you” (1/u)

“Well, what do you suck?” “Oh, the usual normal stuff. Nipples, obviously. Cortina’s penis. Oh wait, it doesn’t exist!”

“Wow, that looks, that looks, that looks like something I’d regret doing.”

“I’m Valery, of course I was gonna be born in October!”

“Nick got the opening gates of Heaven.” *aaHHH* T: “Yeah, that’s what it’s supposed to look like.”

“I don’t regret.”

“It’s not my fault, it’s *in unison* the problem’s fault.”

T: “du du du, oh who cares?” “I learn so much in math.”

T: *quiet cry of why*

“I would’ve gotten the points -- if I wasn’t such an idiot!”

“I’m so hurt.” “Matthew, this is HELL”

“How long does it take to render it?” “Uh.” “9 million years.” “Yeah, I’d estimate that”

*twins in unison* “Double the cream, double the fun. The new Oreos double stuffed”

“It’s Valery’s D”

“Look man, I don’t chose my socks”

“The way I wrote it, it says yey.” “YEY!”

“I got it, but I didn’t.” “What was it?” “The y. It’s not yey, it’s ey.”

*me and a friend singing Bet on It*

“Everything in math matters.”

“I don’t care anymore.” “Damn, Nigel doesn’t care anymore.”

“Man, I miss my gummy bears.” T: “At what rate did I eat those gummy bears?”

“You gotta draw the lake (leak).” T: ??? *draws squiggly* “No, the leak!” T: “Oh, leak? I thought you said lake!”

T: *draws a house* “Yo, that’s a face!” “That’s Squidward’s house!” “It’s a totem!”

That time I fooled a classmate

“I thought you said that my sexuality gives you the fractions.” “Obviously.”

“Stop reminding me that I forget basic math relations.” “What did you forget?” “4th grade math.”

“Can’t you just do that?” “No, you plebeian!”

“You have to multiply eveRYTHING”

“It concaves up.” T: “It concaves up.” “yOOOO” Class: “OHHHHHH” “We’re geniuses!”

T: “She (J) gets so excited when she understands something!” *class starts laughing* T: “No, I’m serious, it’s a good thing!” Student to J: “Is that why you’re never excited?” *class oohhhs*

“The only blue pen I have.” “It’s not even blue, it’s black!” “Well shit”

“You’re so squoosh!” “I’m just a skeleton with a layer of donuts”

*Psycho music plays* *class laughs* “The impending doom of the math that approaches!”

“What do you call a snake that is exactly 3.14 meters long? A π-thon!”

T: “Who has the (unit) circle?” “I like lowkey know it.” T: “Really lowkey.”

“Great. Now back to my regularly scheduled gay shit.”

“Nick the dick.”

“Nick the brick licks slick dick sticks.” “Nick the thick brick.” “Nick the sick thick chick brick licks slick dick sticks.”

T: “I’ve actually taken out the batteries of my remote control to put in my calculator.”

“Fuck yeah!” T: “Are you frustrated?” “No, I said ‘fuck yeah’!”

“I didn’t know why everyone was screaming POI until it finally hit me.” “Man, her mind was on POT.”

“She’s Jesus!”

“Look at this net, that I just found!” “I was thinking the exact same thing!” “NO STOP”

*me pointing at i* “BALD BALD BALD BALD”

“Do we use a calculator for this?” “No calculators, we die like men.”

“Error. Good job.”

T: “No me de esa cara.”

T: “Let’s see, what did I call it here ... nothing.”

“What in equation? What in optimization?”

T: “I was doing this in a rush. Never do things in a rush, guys.”

“You could get caught!” “I don’t give a shit.” “You’d lose $60!” “Oh shit, maybe 2 shits.”

T: “I’ll multiply everything by 3r^2.” “Wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute -- is that legal?” T: “Yes.”

“My numbers are 50!”

“Not gonna lie, I said the word “coefficient”and I was surprised.”

“The naked F.”

“That could be there.”

“Ln is foolishproof, right?”

“What in approximation?”

“Is it fair?” T: “What is?” “Is it fair to flip them?” T: “Yeah!” “Is it legal?”

T: “1 2 3 4 5 6 7 oh whatever.”

“Why are you so extra?” “I’m not extra, you’re just not enough.”

“Will Patty get 2 tickets? *flips the eraser* Matthew.”

T: “You can move out the 3 if it bothers you so much, look at him, probrecito.”

“I thought it was some weird trendy calculus thing.”

“Darth Vader?”

“The answer is divide. The album. Buy it now.”

“YOU’RE a capital F!”

“Nigel, we’re not doing the quiz -- we’re doing the TEST!”

T: “I don’t, I’m sorry.” “No, I’m sorry.” “We’re all sorry.”

*about Nicholas* “He’s already failing, he’s a leftie.”

“With all this work, I’m gonna pull a Kelli.” “What do you mean?” “Cry for no reason.”

T: “It’s integrated in your integration work, haha.”

@taylor-tut tHIS IS SO LATE I’M SO SORRY MY FAB FRIENDO! But! It has finally arrived!! I’m sorry if it’s a bit crappy, I like haven’t slept in three days haha

anyhoo, onto the story:

Lance woke up with a sneeze.

He blinked his eyes open, immediately groaning at the light that pierced through his eyeballs and into his temples. He brought an arm up to shield his face, shivering slightly. Taking a deep breath, Lance conducted a mental survey of his condition, assessing his apparently numerous ailments that seem to have manifested overnight.

Congested sinuses that dissolved into a throbbing headache that pulsed outward with each movement? Check. 

Raw, sandpaper throat, and lungs that rattled with every inhale? Check.

The strange sensation of being completely, bone-numbingly cold despite the warmth and clamminess of his limbs? Checkerooni.

Conclusion: Today is gonna suck.

If Lance were to be perfectly honest with himself, he would concede that he had been feeling off these last couple days. Nevertheless, the team needed his 100% right now, and any wooziness he may have felt had to be put on the backburner. With several months having passed without any sign of Shiro, tensions within the castle were palpable.  Keith and Pidge seemed inches away from snapping at any given moment, Allura's training schedule seemed to have been kicked up the several notches from "very harsh" to "dear god I can taste my own pulse", and even Hunk and Coran seemed somewhat subdued. It was the least Lance could do to try and keep up, and make sure the other's stayed optimistic. He was the joker, the sharpshooter - it was his role, no matter how taxing it could be on his own body.

Lance steeled himself, counting down from five, before swinging out of his bed, pausing to lean against the wall as a wave of dizziness washed over him. Once the tilt-a-whirl he usually called a bedroom settled to a soft swaying, Lance began to make his way down to the dining hall.

He was barely through the doorway when a sharp voice rang out. "You're late."

Wincing, Lance turned around, letting his gaze fall upon the very-mullety, very-angry looking teenager propped up against the wall with his arms folded. "Uh, yeah, sorry bout that. Sometimes intergalactic heroes need some beauty sleep." Lance's attempt at a laugh came out raspy and stilted, and he grimaced at the pain that flared in his throat.

Keith stepped towards Lance, fists clenched. "We agreed we were going to spar together this morning. I don't know if you've noticed, but we don’t exactly have time to slack off."

Lance shifted, bringing a hand to rub at the hairs on the back of his neck. "Actually, about that training, I'm really not feeling all that peachy today. I'm pretty sure I'm coming down with something. I'll be good with a few hours sleep, though, but if we could put off the training 'til tomorrow-"

"Are you kidding me?" Lance was cut off as Keith burst forward. "Do you think Shiro has time to just wait while you just lay about because of some cold? Are you seriously that selfish?"

"I-" Lance gulped, shaken.  "I, um, I guess you're right. Shiro needs us."

Keith fixed him with one last glare before turning on his heel and making for the training room. "Hurry up, we've got to make up for lost time."

After a pause, Lance followed. Keith's words settled heavy in his chest, but Lance couldn't bring himself to feel angry. He knew Keith didn't mean it, he was just stressed - they all were. And so long as Lance could just push past his body's complaints, he could get the training over with and make Keith happy. Everything would be fine.

Alright. Lance may have slightly over-estimated how fine it would be.

He stumbled as Keith managed another hit on his calves, throwing him off balance. Lance grimanced, steeling himself as the wooziness that had been pulsing through him all morning surged, prickles of misery crawling up his neck.

"What the hell is wrong with you," Keith bit out, his tone making Lance flinch. "You're usually at least competent enough to dodge most of my attacks."

"Sorry, I just- I told you earlier, I'm not feeling too good." 

Keith scowled. "All of us are tired, but you don't see any of us slacking off. For once in your life, Lance, just do the selfless thing and suck it up."

Lance locked his jaw and nodded, not trusting his voice. He felt awful. His whole body hurt, and his bones felt like they were made of glass, and he was freezing. Seeing Keith so mad at him definitely wasn't helping.

They returned to exchanging blows, and Lance skirted his feet sluggishly, trying to avoid Keith's flurry of attacks. After a way-too-fast pivot on his heel, he rocked forwards as his vision doubled, spots dancing in front of his face while he struggled for breath. In his distraction, Keith landed a firm kick to Lance's stomach, and Lance stumbled back, falling onto his back.

Keith growled, throwing his bayard to the floor. "Okay, you know what? I'm done with this. You're not even trying!" 

Lance climbed back onto his feet, wobbling slightly. "It was an accident,"

Keith continued, his frustration spilling out like hot magma. "I can't believe you, Lance. I'm starting to think you don't even care about finding Shiro."

Lance reeled back, blinking in shock. "Keith - I- of course I do, you know I do! How could you even think that?" His voiced wavered dangerously.

"Maybe because while everyone else is working their hardest to get him back, you're ready to give up the second things aren't going completely your way. It's typical."

Lance was stunned, Keith's words knocking the wind out of his chest, more painful than any of the physical blows he had been receiving only several minutes prior. "Keith, you have to understand, I'm-"

Lance's words caught in his throat as he was overcome by an irresistible urge to cough. Before Lance could so much as inhale, his lungs convulsed in sharp bursts, and he doubled over, coughing into his wrist. The coughs were rough and wet, rattling in his chest and tearing through his already raw throat, bringing tears to his eyes.

Keith faltered, his anger melting away into confusion and concern. "Lance?"

The other boy didn't seem to hear him, focused instead on his alarmingly depleting oxygen supply. Keith walked over, pressing a steadying hand to Lance's shoulder -but froze as his finger's brushed the other boy's neck. The skin was burning.

As soon as Lance's coughs died down, Keith pressed a hand to Lance's forehead, and then brought the backs of his fingers to Lance's cheek. Lance, leaning unconsciously against Keith, blinked up in confusion.

"Keith, what are you…" Lance trailed off.

Keith responded with a muttered curse, before gripping both of Lance's shoulders and levelling him with a scrutinizing gaze. He could feel Lance's thin frame shivering slightly under his hands. 

"Why didn't you say you were this sick?" Keith demanded. 

Lance ducked his head, embarrassed. "I tried," he mumbled, "but you said I needed to train. Anyway, you were right - I couldn't land a single hit on you."

Keith shook his head rapidly, his eyes darkening with guilt. "Lance," he tried, voice rough. "That's- it's not your fault. You're sick, really sick. It's no wonder you're off your game - I'm actually surprised you stayed upright this long." 

Lance chuckled raspily. "Well, I had a few close calls." Lance paused to cough again, wincing as it scraped through his swollen throat. "But now I think I'ma just go to sleep, if that's alright…"

Keith frowned as Lance's body weight leaned further against him, his head falling onto the crook of Keith's neck. Despite the scalding heat Keith could feel from where Lance's forehead touched his skin, the boy's shivering increased, and he pressed himself further into Keith, too far gone to worry about his clinginess.

"Lance," Keith levelled, voice soft but firm.

Lance blinked up at him drowsily. "Hm?"

"You can't sleep here. The pods won't be up again for at least another day, but I can at least take you to bed, so you can get some proper rest. I'll see if Coran or Allura have any medicine that could help you for now."

Lance nodded, responding to Keith's tugs as they slowly made their way back to the rooms, stopping every few steps to accommodate Lance's frequent coughs and sways. When they finally arrived, Keith eased Lance onto the bed, pulling the blankets over him with uncharacteristic tenderness. Once he was settled, he gazed up at Keith through heavy lids.

"Keith?"

"Yeah?" Keith replied as he busied himself looking for extra blankets.

"I didn't mean to let Shiro down. I really do care about finding him, I swear."

Keith sighed, refusing to look at Lance as another wave of guilt swept over him. "I know that. I was just - frustrated. I didn't mean anything I said."

Lanced hummed to himself, relieved. After a moment, he piped up again, voice slurring a little: "By the way, I think you got the wrong room, I'm pretty sure this isn't mine."

Keith turned to look at Lance, shaking his head. "This is my room.  I wanted to put you somewhere I could keep an eye on you, at least until that fever goes down."

Lance's eyes widened, a pool of warmth settling deep in his stomach. "You didn't have to do that."

Keith walked towards Lance, eyes softening. "I wanted to. It's my fault you got this bad - I should've listened to you back there. I just-" Keith ran a hand through his hair, "I've been so wound up lately, about Shiro, and everything, I guess.” 

Lance met Keith's gaze, and reached out to touch his hand with his slightly trembling fingers. "I know. I understand." Lance paused. "Are you okay?"

Keith drew back, brow crumpled. "Am I okay? You're the one in the sickbed right now!"

"Yeah, but I know things’ve been especially hard on you lately. You've gotta be pretty wound up."

Keith looked down at Lance, rubbing a thumb across the fingers that held onto his own. "I'm alright Lance, don't worry. Just focus on yourself for now, okay? I'll be right here with you."

Lance nodded, the pull of sleep drawing his eyelids shut and slurring his words. "You promise?"

Lance felt Keith squeeze his hand. "I promise."

I don't believe in saying sorry.

Might be relieving because it gives a sense of certainty. I.e. Are they sorry or aren't they? Do they know I'm sorry or don't they?

But you still never really know and neither will they.

Based off the assumption person does not feel sorry unless specifically verbalized. Why can't it be there other way around? It's pretty shitty to assume people are shitty.

Actions and consequences are always either accidental or intentional. If intentional then apologies are meaningless. If accidental then apologies shouldn't be necessary.

I don't need an apology for an accident. I don't want people to feel bad for something they didn't mean to do and they shouldn't feel the need to apologize for a mistake. At the most they need only acknowledge it.

I don't need an apology for something intentional. If you hurt me on purpose, you shouldn't get to apologize and feel better about yourself.

Apologies don't reduce the pain you've experienced nor should they be necessary to move on.

Friends should never have to say thank you or I'm sorry. It's always implied.

Maybe because I'm so used to being hurt both intentionally and unintendedly.

Apologies give you someone to blame. I.e. my life sucks but that person admitted it was their fault.

When you experience deep, unending despair you realize it doesn't matter whether or not people say sorry. It changes nothing.

I think people really like it because it makes the giver feel like they aren't bad people and the receiver feel superior.

If you apologize to me for an accident then that is based on the assumption that I'm a kind of person who assumes people are malicious unless they say otherwise. I find that to be kind of "silly" for the lack of a better word and a bit pessimistic about the nature of people. Although in reality that might by closer to the truth than my assumption. (To be fair any general estimation of malicious acts is very subjective) You only need to admit your mistake to avoid confusion if anything. But that's not even really necessary because I'll just assume it was a mistake barring some extreme circumstances. (Although the gauge at which people measure intentional acts varies significantly. Aka someone spilling something on you. Was it on purpose? What if they just said "haha oops" and smiling? And not offering to help. Seems like it was intentional by most people's measure. But it is possible that it is a nervous reaction and they froze. You never truly know. Only that person and only in that moment. Even memories change.

It's lonely eating croissants alone

Too many came in the pack for me to eat before they get cold! My stomach's starting to hurt from trying to eat them all 😅

Lonely is one word for how I've been feeling lately. My parent's have been in New York for about two or three days now and my brother left here to go to Mom's, pretty much the night they left, because our Dad and step-Mom wouldn't let him have a party while they're gone. So I've been in this big empty house alone! We just moved here last month so I still get frightened when it's dark(it's ten times as big as our old house).

Normally loneliness hasn't been an issue; I've felt it but it hasn't brought me down. Until now, haha. Maybe it's not having a boyfriend? However, I doubt that as well since it hasn't bothered me before either. But that realm of my life has been strange..

I can't remember if I've ranted about my last boyfriend(not that anyone here keeps track :P), this happened less than a month before our one year anniversary in August, but basically he said he wanted "space" and that it definitely wasn't a break because I have said I'd break up with anyone who'd put me on a break because it's dumb. It was a break. But he did it because he said he thought he wasn't being a good boyfriend and wanted to figure out how he could treat me beetttttterr(sarcasm doesn't work well online, so that was me enacting myself being a fOOL). Anywho, I tried to give him space because if you're gonna say that - and leave me on a beach more than a twenty minute drive from my house - you need space from me to figure it out, right? Wrong, I gUeSs.

But after a week and a half of being sad and waiting, I asked him when we could talk about it and he got upset and said it "wasn't something he could estimate". So from then on I thought of us as broken up but didn't give the closure or final nope I wanted to because, as my step mom said, he made this decision and it's his responsibility. So a month goes by, he hasn't said anything to me, but I heard he was talking rudely about me to his friends and acquaintances, which didn't affect me until I learned he said, "it sucks my first girlfriend had so many family issues" which just made me lose all respect for him.

So I sent him a "it's over" type message since we're gonna see each other in school and I made sure to include a part that said, "I hope we can both be mature about this" since I knew he wasn't. But that was that, he started some more crap when we went back into university but, what are we? Five? It bugged me but oh well.

Plus, my first boyfriend started talking to me again(LIKE DURING THAT TRAINWRECK), being friendly, and wanting to talk NON STOP. In the mindframe I was in, I kept thinking about him and how lovely we were(even before we started talking, no one compares), soooooooooooo ooOoh nOoo I(think I'm) caUght(/catching) FeeLings(haha, tiktok). Or I at least caught the hope of "hey maybe".

While we were talking and goofing around one night directed me to an instagram account where he and his room mates were keeping an online scrapbook of their lives. I watch a video. The one recording grabs his arm. I go, "aww, haha, is that your GiRlFrIeNd". He goes "actually yeah" anD IM LIKE OOFIE OUCH MY HEART BUT IM SO HAPPY HE FINALLY MOVED ON BECAUSE BEFORE HE MOVED AWAY HE WAS REALLY REALLY STUCK ON ME SO I JUST SAY, "Aww, so cute!"

It's funny tho because after he told me and I was selfishly sad for five seconds I snapped out of it and every romantic feeling I had towards him was gone. Nevertheless, I told him it was inappropriate to be talking because, even tho we're friends, the fact of the matter is that I'm his ex-girlfriend and we are talking like a lot considering he has a girlfriend and I felt bad that I was getting all the time she should have been getting. He made a big fuss for about two to three hours and we're still talking now, but thank goodness, a lot less. I've since then talked to his girlfriend and she's lovely. However, the only odd thing is that she told him not to tell me about her and she specifically didn't post anything romantic about them on her Instagram even before he and I started talking and I followed her. Buuuuutt, not my circus, not my monkeys.

So maybe all that's been having a combined effect on me? Oh plus, it was "national boyfriend day" the other day and everyone was so cute! But for some reason my heart felt sad when I saw all the cute pictures. Very weird

Anyway, I think I just needed to write that all out, haha. But, even though I've been having an extra hard time with loneliness lately, I am very lucky. Along with many other things, I have a best friend who is a delight ♡ she is always there for me, a homie, my bro, tells me to throw hands when I need to, and we're even going on a cute date to a farm tomorrow and making a pie afterwards! Everything will be okay