ultimately when it comes to shipping and fandom space treatment of aspec characters i just don't accept "aro/ace people can still date/have sex" as an answer from nonaspecs. like yeah. mhm. okay. now i think we both know that you're not saying that out of real interest in the diversity of aspec experiences. so you can turn in your seventeen-page essay on why and how you plan to examine this character's aspec identity within the context of a romantic or sexual relationship complete with evidence from canon and peer reviews from multiple aspec people within the next week or i'm putting you in the pit from the edgar allen poe story

I just . Repeating "characters are tools" you end up erasing so much about arashi's character and motivations and interactions with other characters if you avoid using her pronouns aka avoid showing she's transgender. It's on the same level of frustration with the translators i had when i saw they had Mika speaking standard English, there's a LOT that gets lost if you don't show those little things.

The thing is I am definitely not happy or chill in the Immediate Sense lately but I am, big picture, so fucking happy with the person I am.

It's like. My brain was made by and for consistent trauma and since that trauma stopped about 5-7 years ago, it is incredible what the amount of resilience and cleverness and flexibility and thoughtfulness I developed to survive can do when it's not being all spent on surviving. like I had a hundred ton weight on me so I had to get REALLY STRONG to stay in the same place and not get 100% crushed, and when that weight came off I found I can use the strength it used to take to stand up and I can leap tall buildings in a single bound.

I was talking to my mum the other day and she said, "you've got the 'fuck it' energy at 30 that most women don't find until their fifties at least" and I'm like yeah man. Imagine how unstoppable I'll be in 20 years.

pov me seeing anything vague: omg is that about me

Aro culture is worrying any 1-1 text could be romantically misinterpreted by the receiver, especially when asking to hang out or giving advice

.

it's actually so sad and disheartening being a fan of men's sports or sports that are predominantly played by men as an abuse victim/survivor and/or a woman. a constant reminder that you and your pain and experiences don't matter, basically

I just had to share this video because holy shit, it hits the nail right on the head! So well spoken. This stuff needs to be circulated more, esp with the growing number of people thinking they have this because of misinformation, or just outright faking it.

mirror mirror

Send me   “ mirror mirror “   to get a glimpse of my muse after they’ve turned to the dark side… 

"You're telling me, you have them in a cell and all you're going to do is let them wait."

"With food and water and a bloody pillow. No blood, no pain, no psychological torture? How boring."

"They're not going to tell you anything just lingering there with home comforts. You're supposed to be in charge, feared, people are supposed to cower when they hear your name and you think this is how you maintain that reputation, please. If you're not going to do it yourself, at very least, let someone else."

"Me."

Apparently this is a Hot Take, but imo pets do not need to be groomed to the same standards as show dogs. There is no need to force a scared dog to deal with loud force dryers and meticulous fluff drying just to make sure the coat is perfectly straight. Kennel drying is not a bad thing. The cut may not be as perfectly even, but does it really need to be? As long as the coat is clean and brushed out thoroughly, I don't see the problem.

In an ideal world, every dog would be comfortable with the whole grooming process, but that's not the reality I'm working with. I groom pets, and many of those pets come to me either never having been groomed or having had bad experiences with grooming. Teaching them that grooming doesn't have to be scary or difficult takes time, and if the owners don't do the work at home, their dogs may never be 100% comfortable on my table. I would rather send a dog home with a cute but less than perfect haircut than force them through a process that terrifies them. This is doubly true for doodles, since half of their owners prefer the wavy rustic look anyway.

I work for myself so thankfully I don't have to have this argument irl, but I am so tired of seeing it in my professional groups. Some groomers are just so hung up on turning out the 'perfect' groom that they disregard the wellbeing of the animal in front of them. It's not worth it, the owner doesn't care (if they did they would have done more to make the dog comfortable from the get go) and it makes such a huge difference for the dog's experience.

i'm #newtoradblr i've spent so much time these past two weeks scrolling through radfem blogs i knew i had to make an actual radfem side of tumblr blog for my own sanity. the way i "peaked" is kinda funny 3-4 months ago i liked a radfem post without realizing and all of a sudden i had other radfem posts recommended to me by the algorithm and i was so annoyed because i was very anti-terf etc but for a couple days i read through a bunch of radfem blogs and it was actually such a relief to encounter FEMINISM not some watered down version of it but i felt guilty due to 5+ years of conditioning (and also because i had a nonbinary friend sitting right next to me in class as i was doing this) and i also didn't like the prominent use of the word moid? but anyway, 3 months later, i'm not sure why but the mra nature of the trans movement has grown so much more apparent to me i have like three mutuals who are trans men on my other blog and i would find myself rereading the few feminist posts i would reblog/write because these people are literally reblogging shit like "don't think like a terf. men aren't your oppressors, they're your friends/neighbors/brothers/fathers. if you think that any man could harm you you have been fooled by terf rhetoric" like actual morons/meninists. anyway two weeks ago i saw a post made by someone i knew was a radfem on my twitter tl and i don't know why i knew i was ready i went through her blog and through many others and now here i am.

finally settling once and for all... with the evidence laid out plainly.. which of these brother boys is more stinkys ,,,

IN THE HEIGHTS countdown: 22 DAYS!

song for today:

so how can i say that while i was away i had so much to hide? hey guys, it’s me the biggest disappointment you know the kid couldn’t hack it she’s back and she’s walkin’ real slow welcome home, just breathe

There are a couple tropes I really love in the space of Miraculous Ladybug fan works, but quite possibly my favorite is when the miraculous holders just get creature from using their powers.

Like yeah, I would say that hosting the power of an abstract concept given sentience, that got shoved into the shape of an animal and bound to a piece of jewelry, would kinda mess with your body a bit.

The little bit of this we get in canon is basically that Adrien loves being a cat and the whole Tikki munches incident.

But I love it when people give them ears and wings and tails, give them eyes that aren't quite human anymore. Fuck with their gender and their sense of body. Sometimes it's body horror, sometimes it's just aesthetic. Love it either way.

I just think it's so fun, a lot of the time it's combined with the like "when a holder and the kawami really respect and bond with each other there's nothing that can be done except having magic bleed into the holder" I think that's fun, but also just making the animal of the kwami a bigger deal is fun. Like if you're going to make it a ladybug you might as well give her wings and antenna and mirrored eyes.

oh - when my nephew was here he also told me that my mother said medication doesn't have any effect on hunger.

hahaha that's so fucking funny, I'm gonna scream :)

(was just reminded of this because I feel like I'm starving. because of my new meds. when without them... I don't really feel hungry until many hours after I should have eaten.)

isa has such a complicated relationship with her childhood and trauma. she'll downplay it at most opportunities, or simply lie to avoid a conversation she doesn't want to have. before the events of bg3, only one person outside of her immediate family knows of her past, and esra is isadora's most trusted confidant. no one in the party discovers even an inkling of her past until act 3.

she isn't an orphan, wasn't horribly abused, didn't have something equally as terrible happen to her as a young child, and when most people she meets have had something truly horrible happen to them, it seems small of her to complain. her parents weren't cruel and provided her a fairly well-off upbringing with a governess to boot. still, when she came of age, she didn't hesitate to flee neverwinter and never return.

her human parents, particularly her mother, were mortified when isa was born with her pink toned skin and stubby horns and the inkling of a tail. her mother outright refused to try for more children for the fear of birthing any more tieflings, and grieved the large family she had always wanted for years when isa was young. her father loved her as much as he could in his stilted way, but he also never brought her into the family's merchant business despite her begging.

isa wasn't locked away, per se, but she had known from a very young age that she'd brought shame to her family, that she was unwanted. she was fed, and educated, and given any and all lessons she wanted, but she had few friends and suffered more scalding from her governess than she did affection from her parents. it was a lonely, guilded cage of a childhood.