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markantonys · 2 years

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diving into lord of chaos! the 3 terms i know from this book going in are The Box, dumai’s wells, and asha’man kill. what do they mean? i don’t know, but i know they’re iconic (and traumatic) and i will be keeping an eye out for them

the similar names are starting to get out of hand. took me a solid paragraph to remember demandred was a forsaken and not some cairhienin (since a lot of cairhienin names have the -dred ending). and every time i see “mazrim taim” i feel like mat and tam al’thor are making up fake names to get free trials of stuff

our first glimpse of shayol ghul and the dark one! very exciting. does the dark one have a corporeal form or is he just like a spirit entity? a deity of sorts? how will rand be able to battle and defeat him? (all rhetorical questions ofc)

i wonder if shayol ghul will exist at all in the show since they’ve changed the dark one’s prison to the eye of the world. now that i’m thinking about it i think that was a great decision bc a) shayol ghul feels like a lotr knockoff whereas the eye and the blight are more distinct and memorable b) what even is the point of the eye in the books? does it ever come up again after the first one? why did moiraine even need to take the kids there in the first place (i’m sure this was explained at the time but i completely forget)? why is there just a pool of untainted saidin chilling there? how is that possible? how can saidin be matter, i thought it was just some intangible force? why doesn’t rand think about going back to the eye to try and use this untainted saidin? all this to say that the show’s version of “the eye is the dark one’s prison and moiraine has to take the kids there to defeat him” is much more clear-cut. and c) older hardened rand going to the eye to battle the dark one in the series finale the same way little baby rand did in the s1 finale will be a beautiful full circle moment and WILL make me cry my eyes out

is it just me or is the aes sedai not letting elayne go to caemlyn very uhhhhh stupid? i understand they want her to finish her training but, political powerhouses as they supposedly are, you would think they’d realize that a huge country being in turmoil because they have no ruler MIGHT cause problems. “if rand has you and caemlyn he has andor” so you think the solution is to keep elayne away and let him have caemlyn all to himself? how is that not worse?

if elayne can make ter’angreal now, i think she should make a matching set of Fuck Hut-esque ter’angreals for all members of the polycule so that they can long-distance date more effectively

"min’s laugh had a huskiness to it; elayne supposed many men would find that attractive. and she was pretty, in a mischievous sort of way.” i swear to god elayne is the most bisexual straight character i’ve ever encountered. i can’t wait for the show to make bi elayne canon

“if [rand] learns about the viewing he might decide it isn’t what we want, only the pattern, or his being ta’veren. he could decide to be noble and save us by not letting either of us near him” elayne says, and she is bang on, but min replies “more likely, if he realizes we’ll both come running when he crooks a finger, he’ll crook it. he won’t be able to help himself.” doing rand a huge disservice and proving that elayne knows him WAY better than she does

“you and i will divide him up like a pie. maybe we’ll let the third have a bit of crust when she shows up.” ugh. min you are losing my esteem left right and center. i absolutely loved her the first 4 books, things took an abrupt nosedive in book 5, and book 6 is not off to a promising start. some of you guys have assured me that min/rand will get much better once they actually have screentime together (though others have said that it remained their least fav rand ship throughout), which i hope is the case bc at the current moment there’s a long ways to go before i will ship it. at this point i’m advocating for mat straight up taking her spot in the polycule rather than being added as a fifth jkdjfg

very fitting that the next scene opens with faile saying “a man is not a horse or a field, neither of you can own him” i do feel like she ought to take her own advice there lmfao but i’m glad to see her again!!! despite how much the tsr relationship drama pissed me off, i actually really love faile? i think that’s an unpopular opinion, but I Just Think She’s Neat

so it seems it’s perrin’s turn to experience the homoerotic ta’veren pull! very interesting how faile thinks about “sharing” perrin with rand with similar language as elayne and min do about sharing rand romantically with each other. if you wanna be my lover you gotta get with my fellow ta’veren to whom fate has inexorably linked me

tangent but i’m realizing that mat’s struggle with his fate-pull to rand is so fucking SIMILAR to min’s and aviendha’s. good GOD just put him in the polycule!

“why did the dragon reborn need perrin now, so strongly that perrin could feel it across however many hundred leagues lay between them?” fellas is it gay to need your buddy so strongly that he can feel it from hundreds of leagues away

i know we hate gawyn, but him thinking about swearing an oath to give his life for elayne’s when he was “barely tall enough to peer into elayne’s cradle” 🥺🥺 that got to me okay? and i can’t blame him for believing the rumors that rand killed morgase and elayne and now wanting to kill rand for it. “gawyn had chosen to stay because his mother had always supported the tower, because his sister wanted to be aes sedai” that was an aha! moment for me where i felt that i understood gawyn’s decision in the coup much better - he has no reason to disbelieve the charges against siuan (esp since he was already suspicious of her for concealing elayne’s whereabouts) and he truly thought that supporting elaida (who was his mother’s advisor for most of his life) meant supporting the tower, and therefore his mom and sister. i still have no strong opinion about gawyn either way, time will tell whether i join the ranks of gawyn haters or end up taking him under my wing as a problematic fav

sevanna mentions a small cube that a wetlander gave to her with instructions of what to do with it once she had rand. mesaana mentions something called a “stasis box.” could one or both of these things be THE box????

i am 65% sure osan’gar is ishamael brought back to life (we know he’s a male forsaken but not rahvin, and i don’t think any of the other dead ones are important enough to make a comeback), but i wonder who aran’gar could be

“stripped to the waist...sweat slicked his hair to his skull, rolled down his chest...figures like that on the white banner overhead twined around his forearms, glittering metallically red-and-gold” god bless, we continue our tradition of a sexy description of rand to kick off the book (post-prologue). i vividly remember tfoh opening with a sexy description of him lounging by a window in rhuidean, and i believe tgh began with him shirtlessly sparring with lan

“sometimes he was so sick of himself that he really was ready to die” 😭😭😭😭😭

“rand said nothing; mat’s secrets were his own” protective boyfriend! “he supposed mat had to have read a book sometime, somewhere, but mat did not have much interest in books” exasperated boyfriend!

bashere is so chill i love him. how he has a daughter who is Like That i have no idea. i hope we get to see him and faile interact sometime.

“he would welcome more men who could channel walking the earth unmolested. finally he would stop being a freak.” 😭😭😭😭 man that just shattered my heart. sometimes it really hits that rand is only a deeply lonely 20-year-old trying his best. also, rand’s channeling abilities as metaphor for queerness example #372456

“i’m going to build something, leave something behind. whatever happens, i will do that! i’ll defeat the dark one. and cleanse saidin, so men don’t have to fear going mad, and the world doesn’t have to fear men channeling” just copy in all my commentary from the previous bullet point, crying emojis included

lots of mentions of rand’s luck, and taim even says he has the dark one’s own luck. which as we know is a mat thing! leave me to grasp at what cauthor straws i can, ok? now that i mention it, i’m 90% sure that the very first instance of “time to toss the dice” was actually rand, when he was trying to take them all thru the portal stone in tgh

lews therin when rand yells at him to shut up: surprised pikachu.jpg. interesting that he may be an actual conscious (?) voice that rand can talk to, rather than just memories etc. but does this mean that lews therin will never truly get to rest in peace, if some part of him is still alive thru rand? that’s so sad :(

i feel that entrusting all these male channelers to the tutelage of some powerful and dangerous guy who just showed up who rand is getting bad vibes from right off the bat may not be the smartest idea, but poor rand is so overworked, he really doesn’t have many other options

“to the maidens, rand was all those children come back, the first child of a maiden ever to be known to everyone”

okay okay okay i’m fine moving on

“he had to stay away from [aviendha]. he carried death with him like a contagious disease; he was like a target, and people died near him” see? elayne was bang on

rand absolutely owning the maidens by telling a joke so bad even i can’t work out the punchline. i love him.

“tolmeran’s doubts centered on mat. despite what he had heard from cairhienin of mat’s skill in battle, tolmeran thought it flattery from fools for a country man who happened to be a friend of the dragon reborn” i just KNOW there are rumors that mat only got his job because he’s sleeping with rand, i just know it

“they were honest objections, and semaradrid’s even had validity” so rand thinks that tolmeran’s objections about mat are NOT valid. supportive boyfriend!

the maidens giving rand advice for how to get aviendha’s attention i’m crying they are his big sisters and moms!!! i love them!!!!

had to post this passage in full bc i’m hollering. i rest my case about there being rumors that mat is sleeping with rand. he is so anxious about anyone finding out rand teleported to his room for a pre-dawn bootycall (which, come on, rand, you can’t just teleport directly into someone’s room in the middle of the night, mat would’ve been well within his rights to stab you)

“how do you know you’re in love with a woman, mat?” “how in the pit of doom should i know?” mat has no time for your heteronormative assumptions rand

i feel like rand didn’t even need mat’s input on anything, he just came bc he wanted to talk to him 🥺 usually rand keeps his problems close to his chest, but he’s venting pretty freely to mat rn

rand saying “no man should have another man’s voice in his head” about his own problems and mat thinking he’s talking about HIS problems AAAAAAHHHH JUST FUCKIN TALK TO EACH OTHER YOU IDIOTS!!! YOU HAVE (SOME OF) THE SAME PROBLEMS!!! GIVE EACH OTHER THERAPY!!!!! GODDAMMIT

mat has adopted a child!! he really went “i’ve only had olver for a second and a half but if anything happens to him i’ll kill everyone in this town and then myself.” he is such a dad!!!! him kneeling down to talk to olver instead of talking about him over his head to another adult because he used to hate when adults did that to him 🥺🥺🥺 this will be all the more touching in the show with Dad Mat already established by his devotion to his sisters

i am so sooooo curious about the lands beyond the aiel waste and wonder if we’ll ever see more of them

#wot #wot book spoilers #oh i forget whereabouts this happened but i cracked up when rand was like 'uh oh i lost asmodean. oh well!'#poor asmodean really did get the most unceremonious offing

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crystalstar8 · 3 years

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Knights of the Night (Epilogue 2)

Epilogue 2

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9, ch 10, ch 11, ch 12, ch 13, ch 14, ch 15, ch 16, ch 17, ch 18, ch 19, ch 20, ch 21, ch 22, ch 23, epilogue, epilogue 2

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 1,053

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France, human trafficking

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j @daechwitad-2 @zobadak @fallenstar-7

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing...

Jungkook was waiting for her outside the building, a rose in his hand. Catalina’s nose scrunched into a smile as she skipped down the stone steps.

France was overwhelming; the architecture everywhere was ancient and beautiful, and the history was fascinating and rich. The people were a bit rude, especially once they realized they were Americans. They were only a bit more forgiving when Namjoon, Taehyung, and Yoongi showed off their fluent French.

The theater Catalina had her audition in was stunning. The outside was all white columns and friezes, the inside was mosaic tiled floors and painted ceilings.

When she reached the bottom of the stairs, she dropped her dance bag and threw herself into Jungkook’s arms.

“You got me a rose?” she asked, leaning back just enough to look at the rose in his hand.

“Of course I got you a rose,” he said. “You think I’d let you step out of an audition without a rose?”

Catalina giggled and took the flower from him.

“How did it go? Did you get in?” he asked.

“I don’t know yet,” said Catalina. “They’re going to do callbacks in a few days.”

“Good thing we’re staying for a while,” said Jungkook.

“But honestly, it doesn’t matter if I get in or not,” said Catalina. “There’s always next year. And There’s always plenty of shows.”

“Yeah, you have all the time in the world,” said Jungkook. He stared at her for a moment, then whispered, “I want you to turn me.”

“Oh yeah?” Catalina asked. She had been waiting for this. She knew that he was worried about aging without her, she could see it his eyes sometimes when they went to bed together, knowing she wouldn’t fall asleep. She especially saw it on his birthday. “You’re still young.”

“I know, but I’m already the same age as you now,” he said.

“Oh no! You’re the same age as me! You basically have one foot in the grave already!” Catalina giggled. “You should take your time. You get hotter every year. Let yourself ripen a bit before doing this.”

He laughed loudly and tugged her closer.

“That’s true,” he said.

“Wait until we both graduate,” said Catalina. “We can talk then.”

“You’re pulling an Edward on me?” he said. “Next thing I know, it’ll be, ‘wait until we’re married’.”

Catalina giggled and swatted his arm. “You’re being a baby.”

“I know. I’m kidding,” he said. “I can wait.”

“Besides, we need time to explore the wonders of blood drinking during sex,” she said. “Did you know there’s aphrodisiacs in the venom when you drink from someone? It’s supposed to make them pliant, but it doesn’t turn them into a vampire.”

“That sounds hot,” said Jungkook. “Also, I am a fan of being manhandled. I’m not ready for that to end just yet.”

“I know. We might need a chaperone though,” she said, tapping her chin. “I don’t know if I’d be able to stop once I got started. You smell way too good.”

“We have plenty of time to work out the specifics,” said Jungkook. “I need time to get hotter each year, so we’ll figure it out.”

They both laughed as they went to the car waiting for them.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Taehyung loved the Louvre. It was like a dream come true, wandering the unending corridors, seeing all the classics he’s idolized for hundreds of years.

“Taehyungie, what’s this one called?” Jimin asked. His hand was covering the informational plaque under a series of paintings depicting a man looking at a celestial globe. Jimin had been doing this for hours, but Taehyung didn’t mind. He loved sharing what he knew about all his favorite pieces.

“That’s ‘The Astronomer’, by Vermeer,” said Taehyung. Jimin smiled and strolled ahead down the corridor, in search of his next quiz. It was a weekday, so the museum wasn’t very busy. There was a tour group of young students, which Taehyung and Jimin ran into a few times, but otherwise there were only a few stray artists wandering around doing sketches of the statues.

In the back of his mind, Taehyung knew that the rest of their group was supposed to meet them here at some point, but Taehyung and Jimin were so far into the maze of art that he wouldn’t even know how to direct them once they arrived. He wasn’t worried about it either. He was having too much fun with Jimin to care about the others right now.

Every moment spent with Jimin was special to him. He still couldn’t believe sometimes how quickly Jimin had reassured and forgiven Taehyung; he was so sure Jimin would hate him for making that decision for him. And while Jimin was struggling getting used to his new life, he made it clear that he was thankful to be alive, that he was excited to spend forever with Taehyung.

“What about this one?” Jimin asked. Taehyung strolled over to look at what painting Jimin was at.

“‘St. Michael Vanquishing Satan’,” said Taehyung. “Raphael.”

Jimin continued down the hall, eyes flitting across each painting. Taehyung was most excited to see David; he heard that the statue was way bigger in person than one would expect.

Taehyung stopped. The painting he was looking at made his eyes widen and his mouth fall open. The plaque said that the artist was unknown. Jimin must have noticed that Taehyung had stopped moving, because he wandered over, letting out a gasp when he saw the painting.

They didn’t say anything for a while. The school group wandered past behind them, the children’s voices bouncing off the stone walls.

“Hey, that guy looks just like you!” a voice shouted from behind them. Jimin turned around to talk with the girl, who was pointing at Taehyung. Taehyung didn’t take his eyes off the picture though. He felt a tear roll down his face.

“Can I take a picture of you with that painting?” the little girl asked. Taehyung wiped the tear from his cheek and nodded, turning around to face the girl. She lifted her phone and snapped a picture. She gave them a toothy smile before running to catch up with her classmates.

“Is this Adrianna’s work?” Jimin asked. Taehyung nodded. He turned back around to stare at the painting of himself with his dog.

A/N:

And that’s a wrap! Thank you to everyone reading this and sticking with me during this story. Reading the comments was my favorite part of this journey.

This story is officially novel length! I’ve never accomplished that before with a complete work! I’ll be posting this story on Wattpad, and I’m also thinking of changing names and adding scenes to make this a publishable work, so keep your eyes out for updates on that!

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woogurl · 4 years

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The peculiar case of woosanhwa.

DISCLAIMER: i am not a professional at reading body language, just putting out my observations.

now, i’ve been thinking about their relationship for a while now and i think most people would agree with me when i say these three are particularly close to one another. more so than the other members, i’ve noticed in vlives that these three communicate the most with each other.

there’s no doubt in my mind that they have a deep and genuine bond. but do i think the relationship between these three go deeper than brotherly love.

no, i don’t think so, mostly because as i’ve said before. i don’t think seonghwa is bisexual or gay. this is just something i’ve determined from seeing his interactions with woosan. now if you think seongjoong is entirely different and proves that he is that’s fine. but i’ve never watched a compilation of seongjoong. this is just what i’ve determined from watching woosanhwa. this says a lot because ateez is probably one of the few groups that give me massive gay/bi vibes.

let’s talk about his relationship with woosan.

let’s start with woo.

now, i’ve said it before, but i’m so sure that woo is or was physically attracted to seonghwa, but it is obvious seonghwa doesn’t have mutual feelings. anytime woo does something like attempt to kiss seonghwa he’s just like “please don’t” at times it looks like he’s barely putting up a fight, but i don’t think he does this because he secretly enjoys it. i just think seonghwa is a man with a lot of patience and i mean a lot. like sheesh. any man would probably punch tf out of someone crushing his balls but seonghwa sat there and took it(woo’s such a brat, lol).

poor baby, anyway, it’s obvious that woo is attracted to him, because as he’s mentioned before he likes to see his reaction when he’s angry. he does this with san a lot too which is what probably starts the sometimes petty arguments. lol.

here some points to reference.

this vlive, seonghwa’s birthday, now it’s important to note that woo does not often appear on vlives. even though i wished he would, he just doesn’t unless it’s a group vlive he rarely goes live and i’m bitter about it as a woo stan. note that san was on the vlive too, but came after woo left and stayed. now, we could hear san in the background during the vlive. but many of us didn’t know he stayed in the background watching seonghwa.

we could only trust anewz to release such confidential information.

now, before i make the point about woohwa, i just want to highlight how close these three are. even though the members often watch each others vlives and congratulate each others birthday and even call. woosan actually came to seonghwa’s bday vlive and woo stated that he wanted to do the vlive with seonghwa which is very telling. ‘cause he rarely does vlives and san, seonghwa and yeosang are probably the members he feels closest too. i would add hongjoong in there too, but i feel like people wouldn’t understand my reasoning why. i’m considering doing an analysis for woojoong. ‘cause i do feel that they are close, but underrated. but anyway. my point is during this vlive woo was super excited and was literally all over seonghwa constantly telling him that he’s so, “handsome”. his hands were roaming all over his neck, shoulders and chest. which i do think woo is attracted to because i’ve caught him trying to look in members shirts multiple times. lmfao. he’s just a bit more curious then i think is normal.

let’s talk about other small moments where woo is much more invested in seonghwa than the others.

this recent moment, where it’s as if yunho doesn’t exist, it was a bit awkward for me to watch because it was clear where woo’s interest was. lol.

this recent moment where he literally abandoned yeosang once seognhwa came in(can i just note there was also a moment here where woo tried to look in yeosang’s shirt and seonghwa was like wtf, stop and woo got embarrassed. lol like i said before i am confident that woo is bi). now, continuing on because i don’t have the captions i’m gonna give a rough translation of what was said. you can always go to the vlives and search for the moment yourself, but i do think the subs are still a bit janky don’t know if they’ve been fixed. but as you can see woo started getting closer to seonghwa. closer than he was comfortable with and you can tell by his body language that he is tense and nervous. if this was anyone else or even san, i honestly don’t think seonghwa would have reacted this way. because this type of skinship is normal but since this is woo. seonghwa’s body is instinctively reacting to something that he is expecting to happen. in this case, i’m more than sure he’s expecting woo to probably kiss him on the cheek. because he says, “i get nervous when you come close”. i mean.....

so yes, he is probably nervous, now note, woo seems to only do this with seonghwa, ‘cause as i’ve said before he’s physically attracted to him. now someone he never does this to is yeosang, but you’re probably like, “because they’re friends and woo prob isn’t attracted to him and yeosang doesn’t like skinship. which i all agree with, but i don’t think seonghwa enjoys it either and i think the difference is that he knows seonghwa probably won’t do anything because he has the patience of a saint.

now this only worries me a TEENY bit because i know that woo can be rough and manhandle people at times. and most of those times he tried to kiss seonghwa it was probably not out of consent. and if you see my woohwa moments where woo attempts to steal a kiss without seonghwa’s permission. it’s clear to see that he is uncomfortable. and i think woo continues to do this because seonghwa is too patient to tell him otherwise. but i DO trust that if seonghwa seriously doesn’t like it and tells him to stop he would. i’m sure things are fine tho because they still seem super close. but i do think seonghwa may be too nice sometimes.

i mean he was treating him like a dog and telling him to sit for the ice cream in that same vlive. lmfao.

woo plays too much, but is super soft and kind. :) but don’t take it from me.

anyway, woohwa is a ship that’s very close and sweet, but it’s obvious that woo is much more infatuated with seonghwa than seonghwa is infatuated with woo. but woo said in the xmas vlive that he knows seonghwa well which is why seonghwa’s “into him”.

however, seonghwa responded and said this was not the case when woo left. seonghwa said that woo’s a tsundere and one second he’s nice and the the next he’s like, “don’t touch me.” lmfao. now that i know this i wonder if woo does this with san as well. where he looks like he can’t be bothered with then the next second he’s probably clinging to san in bed. which probably confuses san. it reminds me of that time where woo said he didn’t wanna look at san during an idol radio episode and san was dumbfounded. lmfao.

so, as i’ve mentioned before i believed these two(woosan) are genuinely in a relationship or are somewhat intimate with each other. if this is the case, why does woo do this? why does he shamelessly flirt with seonghwa lit in his face? lol

now i think most of us probably assumed that woo was someone who doesn’t like to commit or doesn’t like to settle. now a lot of people think this even without knowing his sign. so this was only confirmed for me when i realized that he was a sagittarius. i don’t really rely on horoscopes because they’re not always accurate. but i do feel like this may be something woo has in common with those who are sags.

as a sag this means it’s easy for him to gain interest in someone and we can obviously see that when woo is interested, we’ll know. he has mentioned he doesn’t like to play hard to get. and we also know sags are blunt and honest to a fault and if you watch the old woosan vlives you can tell that it sometimes hurts san’s feelings because he is sensitive and an introvert completely opposite of woo. sags are also known for being slow to commit or preferring to keep things casual. but are very loyal when they do commit.

while san is a cancer and they are the exact opposites. cancers are incredibly sensitive and caring. they’re also quick to commit and are slow to bail when things get tough.

what’s important to note about these two is that their signs are very VERY incompatible.

so like i’ve said it’s best to not rely on horoscopes because we know woosan are bestfriends and soulmates. but we can also see their very obvious differences in personalities when they’re together and we can tell san often gets hurt by woo’s bluntness. but i wanna highlight a moment during an idol radio podcast.

now this is a moment that happened during the radio podcast at 41:50 on schmoosubs channel on yt. during this whole podcast san was clearly upset with woo and woo was attempting to win san back. something you should know about sags is they love to chase. so i’m guessing woo did something to upset san, but woo says in the video that he’s upset with san. lol. but it was this moment in particular that caught my eye because it came out of nowhere.

there was no song being recommended or anything from what i could hear, and suddenly yunho said that and san was like yeah, “i was just a toy”. i’m wondering if he was referring to woo treating him as such which is why he was rejecting him. now it would seem harsh especially if they were referencing block b’s song which is very plausible seeing as the podcast was for recommending songs for people. and idk if it would be a stretch to say yunho was recommending it for san to woo. but interpret it as you want. here are some lyrics.

now why is all this important well, this is just to highlight why i feel woo may flirt with the other members shamelessly and also why they may also fight and seem distant for a period of time and san stops returning woo’s advances. i think it had a lot to do with woo not wanting serious at the moment.

if you watch woosan’s interactions before they were definitely not as close then as they are now. which is a big reason you can’t convince me it’s fanservice, because everything changed before debut they were obviously friends, but after debut you can tell they became more intimate physically and mentally. even the way they look at each other has changed.

another reason i don’t think it’s forced fanservice is because people often forget that seongjoong is also a pretty big ship. just look at the views on yt for seongjoong moments and the number of fanfics(many woosan fics turn out to be seongjoon fics and i’m salty af. lol). they’re much bigger because these are two members that are both popular in ateez. but they don’t really bother with fanservice much. which leads me to believe that even though it’s probably advised KQ doesn’t force them to sell it’s realness despite seongjoong being just as high in demand as woosan.

now, let’s get back on topic and discuss sanhwa(ikr, it’s finally time btch).

sanhwa is definitely one of the softest underrated ships. like they’re obviously very comfortable with each other and are comfortable with skinship enough that they aren’t afraid to cuddle or slap each others butt on camera. their relationship is very domestic and sweet.

this moment happened during hwa’s birthday vlive where he asks san if he has anything to say to atiny and san’s like “i love you atiny” and hwa’s like what about me do you love me more than atiny pick one. lol. san then hung up. can i say he’s so brutal to my boi. but the point is they were very open about their conversation because they have nothing to hide because they love each other and are really trustworthy friends/brothers. i would like to note that san also appeared in hwa’s vlive two other times. this alone proves to me once again that the bond that these three share is particularly close and special.

throughout this vlive they were so touchy and sweet with one another. san is a baby that needs to touch for comfort. and as you can see they’re both comfortable and as i mentioned before. seonghwa doesn’t really care i mean he let san hug him for almost a full two minutes lol. he only gets annoyed around san after excessive physical affection but if it were woo hugging him like that he’d probably feel more so nervous than annoyed. lol.

san is practically a baby around seonghwa. they’re so comfortable around each other and it’s obvious that san let’s his guard down around seonghwa. now, seonghwa is an aries and to me he’s literally nothing like one. lol. he’s probably the most patient person i’ve ever come to know. and to me i think he treats the members similarly and is truly like a parent. although woo does make that hard for him. >_>

now let’s talk about woosanhwa as a whole and woosan, being like no, it’s woosan not woosanhwa.

i can’t believe san bro-zoned seonghwa like that. lmfao. but the fact that seonghwa refers to san himself as woosan is utterly adorable and it really shows the bond between woosan is strong. like they’ve mentioned before their each others halves. and quite honestly i don’t know why woosan is so opposed to people joining, but i do feel like they genuinely dislike being disturbed when they’re alone together. but seonghwa is consistent in wanting to join them. i can honestly say i think he just wants to hang out and doesn’t have an ulterior motive.

san’s basically like i don’t want you to join us, why does he always wants to join us? but then woo’s like he’s really different off camera, yET HE’S STILL SO HANDSOME. just shamelessly flirting with seonghwa. they obviously enjoy teasing him. i’m gonna be honest and say i think san only started teasing him because woo does it. the thing about woosan that is different from all ships is that they literally see each other as one. like a married couple and they make the effort to be alike. when they talk it’s almost as if they’re reading each others minds and voicing each others thoughts. then you just have san going sure you can join, but your name is separated from ours.

seonghwa’s still on a mission to join and they’re both just making fun of him and seonghwa’s like what about woosanhwa. note that seonghwa wanted to join these two during their vlive in the middle but they were still firm in their decision like nah fam, you can do it by yourself tho. which he did end up doing alone. like they really don’t want this man’s to join. he can’t even sit and eat with them. x)

but he finally succeeded in joining them and they finally became woosanhwa. but even though this may seem like a fanservice gimmick i think it just became a joke because woosan wouldn’t let anyone join them. but this does not only apply to seonghwa. it applies to everyone let’s take this moment from last year as an example.

this was a vlive from a while back that started off with woosan, but yunho wanted to join in on the fun. even before allowing him to join they were both, well mostly san was irritated every time yunho called them. you can look at my analysis of this woosan vlive and see how irritated san was every time yunho called. lmfao. to me it wasn’t that serious but it made me realize that woosan probably prefers doing things alone and being alone.

these are just more proofs that they hang outside together off camera a lot. if they were concerned about shipping they wouldn’t be this open. nor do i think they would hang out as often as they do. woo is just talking about his day that mostly involved san and he more then likely didn’t realize how often he was mentioning him. especially in comparison to everyone else and he probably mentioned seonghwa once.

i wanted to add this because to me this alone speaks volumes. these are the three things that make woo smile. i mean san is literally part of ateez, and he’s best friends with yeosang and san. but he put san there and i’m sure it’s because san makes him smile for different reasons. i mean think about it he could have even replaced san with family. this was really powerful.

san is saying they proved it, in my opinion i’m pretty sure he was referring to how well they know each other. the fact that san said they make efforts to to close their differences also speaks volumes. like they don’t even have to like the same things but they make the effort to and this makes them proud. saying it’s fanservice would be so disingenuous and unfair to them. especially when they are clearly close and are proud and open about their relationship. and just because they are open doesn’t mean it’s not real. woosan is a ship that can’t be compared to the others because they’re entirely different than any other ship.

i don’t know why, but hongjoong was being real petty referring to woosan as, “amicus something” like he really had me dying laughing. i think he was lowkey jelly. but san was like i’m gonna have to correct you, it’s, “amicus ad aras” and hongjoong was still clowning and was like “this amicus something team” lmfao. and san AND woo was like “amicus ad aras!”

like woosanhwa is a beautiful ship, but listen to woosan, “it’s amicus ad aras”.

#ateez #woosan #woosanhwa #yungi #wooyoung #san #choi san #Seonghwa #yunho #hongjoong #sanhwa #woohwa

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random-imagines-blog · 4 years

Text

Promise Me Part 2 {Reggie Mantle x Reader}

Requested by: Anonymous Wordcount: 2244 Summary: Some people aren’t taking the kindest to your budding relationship. Sequel to Promise Me, Part 1 Found Here (X)

The only thing better than hanging out with Reggie at school was the reactions from the other students. Especially your ex boyfriend Sweet Pea. Karma came around and knocked him off of his ass, just as you were hoping. Her summer fling, Josie, had dumped him for Archie Andrews, just the way that he had dumped you for her. A petty side of you was happy about that. He deserved it. He got to be grumpy around the halls of Riverdale High while you walked around with Reggie following you like some kind of lovesick puppy. After you had taken him out for his birthday, showed him a good time with a bunch of drag Queens and sugary alcohol-free drinks, he’d taken to you even more. Didn’t even complain when he had to ride bitch on the back of your motorcycle back to your snug little town.

“Are you ready for the test today?” Reggie asked, somewhat sarcastically. You had been blowing him off lately to study for this exam. You really needed to do well on it to pass this class, since you had been just cruising through it instead of trying. It was now or never.

You took your study notes out of your pocket, where they had been crumpled up for a couple of hours, and slammed them down on the cafeteria table. “You have no idea how ready I am, Mantle.” You said with a smirk. You flattered out the pieces of paper and went right back to studying them while Reggie sat beside you and made sure that your hair didn’t get into your food. You were eating without paying attention, and if he hadn’t stepped in, you probably would have eaten a lock or two. You were appreciative of it, but never knew how to show that sort of thing.

You never thought that this would have worked out. Reggie, with his range of emotions - most of them fueled by negativity, like jealousy and arrogance but once in a while, he showed you something nice. Meanwhile, your brother Jughead had once complained that you had the emotional range of a knife. But yet there was something between you two. Something more than you had ever felt with Sweet Pea. This in no way felt like a relationship out of convenience.

“When you pass, I’ll take you out to Pop’s, we’ll get milkshakes,” Reggie said, clipping your hair back for the upteenth time.

“Yay, another milkshake,” You said, deadpan as always. “We always go for milkshakes, Reg, I think that this deserves something a little more special. What about our secret place?”

“What, you showed him your stupid secret place?”A voice came from behind you. You didn’t have to turn around to know that it was Sweet Pea. Now that he didn’t have Josie to focus on, his attention had been on you again. Love notes, flowers, trying to sit next to you in class. You had told him to fuck off so many times, it might as well have become your catchphrase. But there he was, always there, right out of the corner of your eye, listening to everything that you were saying. “I’ve known you forever and you never took me there.”

“Guess you just weren’t special enough,” You said with a shrug. You got to your feet, shoved your notes back into your pocket and smiled rarely at Reggie. “Come on, walk to me class.”

“Yes ma’am,” Reggie said with a smirk, getting to his feet. He purposefully pushed past your ex boyfriend as he followed behind you, neither of you looking back. The Serpent wasn’t worth it. That was something you had come to learn and fully believed.

You wore the top that your mother had gotten you and sent in the mail. It was plain, but flowy, and didn’t have the leather look that you had come to be known for. All black t-shirts and jackets, comfortable things. But this was a special night - even to the point where you were allowing Reggie to pick you up in his car. This shirt was a dark purple color, not quite black, but still enough to where you felt yourself while wearing it.

There was a honking noise outside the trailer. You still had never let him come inside. You weren’t ashamed of the little home that you shared with your dad and your brother, but you also didn’t want to see the look of distaste that Reggie would no doubt have on his face.

With a last glimpse in the mirror, strange how feminine you looked today, you left the trailer and walked over to the car that didn’t look like it belonged in this neighborhood at all. It was too nice. And too clean. People were no doubt peeking out their windows to see who were there and who they were there for. With your usual level of confidence, you strode to the car and got inside, only to be greeted by a huge smile and an arm around your hug from Reggie Mantle. “ONE HUNDRED BABY!”

Yes, you had gotten a hundred percent on your test. That was the main reason why you were letting Reggie drive. Because you were so damn excited, that you might try to bribe one of the bartenders to put a shot into your drink. No one really messed with the gay bar, so cops were unlikely to show up. It was hard to ID people when they were dressed as the opposite gender, anyhow. “It’s not that big of a deal,” You said, shrugging his arm off and put on the seatbelt. What an unfamiliar feeling. You spent more time on bikes than you ever did in cars, and those did not come with seatbelts.

“You’re allowed to be happy and excited for things you know,” He said, his smile slightly faltering. “It’s just us. And I’ve seen you happy before.”

“It’s just embarrassing,” You muttered, sinking into the seat. “Having ... feelings.”

Reggie took that as a huge compliment, and it helped to boost his ego. “So you have feelings for me, eh?” He asked with a huge grin.

“Oh stop,” You said, rolling your eyes. “Is it such a surprise that beneath this hard exterior is just soft, pink flesh? I am still human, after all.”

“A bit,” Reggie said with a shrug, focusing his eyes on the row as he tried to find his way out of the trailer park. The streets were thin and like a maze. “You just hide them so well, it’s hard to tell you have any.”

“I wouldn’t be hanging out with you if I didn’t, you dolt.” You sunk into the comfortable leather seats of the car, letting yourself relax now that you were leaving the park. You still had to give him directions to the gay bar, but he was getting the hang of the journey. “People just suck. They break down your walls, just to hurt you so you have to build them back up and stronger. I don’t like being vulnerable.”

“People are assholes,” Reggie agreed, thinking of his on again off again thing with Veronica. He hadn’t thought much about it since you had come into his life, actually.

Rather than get into more conversations about emotions, you turned up the music and rolled down the window, sticking your head out. “Fuck standardized testing!” You yelled out as you drove past the school. Reggie laughed at that, wondering how you could go from steady as a rock to being this free and liberated within a matter of seconds. He’d never met anyone like you before. Never met anyone who truly did not give a fuck about what other people thought of them.

The bar was busy tonight. Friday nights usually were, but there wasn’t a single person there who you recognized from Riverdale. It would be hard for any of them to get in, considering you and Reggie were the only ones that were allowed in under age. Only when you weren’t around the judgmental looks of your peers did you really feel like you could be yourself. You didn’t care what other people said, it was just the fact that they were saying anything that bothered you.

You ordered more of the virgin cocktails that you liked so much, so syrupy sweet. You drained the first one quickly, and felt the sugar remaining in your system. “Dance with me,” You said to Reggie, holding your hand out to him. And he did. He came out onto the dance floor with you and the dressed up Queens and made sure that you had a damn good time.

So good a time that you didn’t notice that there was a familiar face in the crowd. And hand that was connected to the body that was connected to that face had his phone out and was recording video.

“Did you hear that they go to gay bars together?”

“I wouldn’t be surprised if y/n was a lesbian. I wouldn’t want to date a guy again if he did what Sweet Pea did-”

“Reggie’s dad is going to kill him.”

“A hidden drag Queen?”

The words followed you and Reggie around the next morning as you met at your locker and he walked you to your class, just as he always did. His jaw was clenched, a vein popping in his forehead. You understood his anger - his dad would really would get pissed off about this sort of thing. You had heard the rumors. And you had seen the bruises that Reggie refused to talk about, but you never pushed the issue.

It was pushing at your own anger issues as well. You didn’t like this sort of attention - why the hell couldn’t Cheryl do something daring to get the attention onto her, the way she liked it? Burn down her house again or something. You’d give her all your money to do that at this point.

The most amazing thing though, was despite all of these looks and the rumors and the jokes, Reggie stood by your side. He picked you up from your first class, and took you to your second. And then he picked you up from there and took you to lunch. His shoulders were more tense than they usually were, and he had started to grind his teeth. Something would have to be done before both of you exploded.

Everyones eyes were on you when you stepped into the cafeteria. Even your brother’s, though they looked hurt - you never even told him about your special place. Sweet Pea, sitting beside Jughead, looked pissed. You stopped before you got in line, and Reggie bumped into you from behind. You turned around to face him, looking up into his dark eyes. You were always astounded by the sharp jawline that he had, and those cheekbones - he was a fuckin’ hunk.

“I’m bisexual, not a lesbian,” You said, loud enough for everyone to hear. “Not that it’s anyone’s fucking business. And if you’re that damn concerned about Reggie, well...”

You had to stand on your tiptoes because he was so tall. You leaned against him, pressing his chest against yours, using him to steady yourself. You wrapped your arms around his neck and brought him in for a kiss that should ease any doubt in anyone’s mind.

There was a pounding sound on the edge of the room that made you startle yourself out of the bliss that Reggie’s lips had blossomed in you. Expecting it to be a teacher, you turned around, only to see Sweet Pea was raging his way towards you, the chair that he was sitting in pushed to the ground. You turned around, straightening your shoulders, ready to get into a fight with your ex-boyfriend if this was how it was going to end up. You weren’t about to let Reggie defend you, that’s not the sort of girl that you were.

“You don’t deserve her, Mantle,” Sweet Pea sneered, his nostrils flaring.

“Neither did you,” Reggie said in return. He put his arm around your waist, and you could hear the smirk in his voice.

“Get over yourself, Sweet Pea,” You said, not liking the way that they were talking as if you weren’t even there. “So what, Kevin Keller takes a video of us dancing and that, for some reason, is all of your business? I’ll be the first to admit that we aren’t as interesting as you seem to think that we are. You really want something to focus on in that video? Learn some style from those Queens, you boring peasants.”

Reggie laughed for the first time that day at your comments. You leaned back against his chest, motioning for him to back up. “Let’s go to Pop’s,” He suggested.

“Anywhere that’s not here,” You said, exchanging his arm for his hand, holding it tight as you left the cafeteria, leaving even more gossip behind you but at least it was about the kiss rather than rumors of you both being gay.

Fuck the high school rumor mill.

#Reggie Mantle #Reggie Mantle oneshot #Reggie Mantle x reader #Riverdale #Riverdale oneshots #oneshot #oneshots #reggiem #request

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221castiel · 4 years

Text

It’s Definitely Still Pride Month

Let’s pretend It’s still pride month

"What's going on?" Castiel asked, stopping just as he and the two hunters rounded the corner, going from a quiet street, to a much busier one. The music they'd heard from a distance, now blaring, a large crowd of people walking up and, dressed head to toe in bright colours. Reds, Blues, Pinks. Cas had never seen so much colour in one place.

He heard Sam clear his throat from his left. "It looks like the pride festival."

Cas's gaze stayed on the colours for another moment, darting across the crowd, trying to see as much as he could, though it was almost impossible to see it all. There were so many various flags, colours, noises, laughter, happy chatter. It was impossible to stop the small smile that tugged at his lips

"We should go." Cas finally declared. He turned to Dean, though his boyfriends gaze was on Sam, then on the ground, until finally he met Cas's gaze, his green eyes holding an emotion Cas couldn't quite describe. Not that he ever fully understood human's emotions.

There were small things he had learned. Smiles usually meant happy, blushing meant embarrassment, though even still it was hard to fully understand. There was so much to understand. Especially when it came to Dean, who tried hard to make his emotions impossible to understand.

"I don't know," Dean began, his tone hesitant as he glanced back to the festival. Despite that Cas continued to stare watching his boyfriend shift in discomfort? Anxiety? Anticipation? Cas wasn't sure "We've gotta get going to the next case, and Baby needs a quick tune up..."

"Come on Dean," Sam said. "We'll just stay for a few minutes and then get on the road."

"Fine," Dean snapped. "If you both want to go so fuckin’ bad you can go together," Cas didn't reply, instead continuing to glance across Dean's features, his tightened jaw, and clenched fists. "I'll get us snacks, you two have fun, and we'll meet back here in half an hour, okay?"

"Uh yah, sure?" Sam mustered, Dean giving a small nod in response.

For a moment Cas's heart skipped, as Dean stepped towards, raising his arms for a hug. Though just as fast as that moment came it was gone, as Dean realized what he was doing, and instead turned, walking away without another word.

That's how it was always was when in public. Dean wouldn't hold Cas's hand, or do the playful shoulder nudges he would in the bunker. He wouldn't give hugs, or kisses, or smiles, or shoulder taps. Some days it went as far as Dean wouldn't even look in Cas's direction.

It hurt.

That's what humans would call the dull pain in Cas's stomach, the way it twisted when Dean stepped away, or chose to sit on the other side of the cafe's booth. It hurt. It caused pain. It made him wonder what he had done wrong.

He couldn't complain though.

He couldn't force Dean.

He could only hope things would change.

"Come on." Cas finally looked away from the direction Dean had walked off and back to Sam, the other man already stepped towards the crowd.

Cas silently followed Sam through the crowd, from booth to booth. His eyes constantly darting across the crowd, across certain people who wore fun makeup, or other's who wore glittery outfits. He couldn't bring himself to look anywhere else, not wanting to miss a second, of the bright colours, the fun chatter, or the crowd that seemed to buzz with energy.

Humans truly were incredible.

"Uh Cas," Sam began, when they'd stepped to a small booth that gave them a bit of silence from the crowd. Despite Sam speaking, Cas didn't look to him, instead his gaze staying on the table that was set up, darting across the bright pins that were being sold. "I think we should talk about Dean for a sec."

A frown tugged at Cas's lips as he finally looked up to Sam, meeting the other's uncertain expression. "Why?"

"I just want you to understand-" Sam hesitated. "He does love you, he really does, a whole lot. He just has trouble showing it, you know. Our dad wasn't always openly affectionate, or the biggest ally."

"I understand."

"He's talked to you about it?"

"No, but based on everything I know about you two, it was easy to make the assumption."

Sam's lips parted to speak, though before he could Cas turned away looking back to the table of bright pins. He continued to stare, until a cup at the other end of the table caught his attention, small flags filling it, some rainbow, some shades of pinks and oranges, other's mixes of various colours.

He reached his hand out grabbing the closest rainbow flag, eyes staying on the fabric that nod fluttered slightly in the gust of wind. From his right her could hear Sam clear his throat, "I can buy," Sam offered.

"Thank you, Sam."

Cas once again reached his hand out grabbing the bisexual flag before he turned back to Sam, who looked back with a frown, eyes not meeting Cas's and instead stayed on the flags in Cas's hands. "Two?"

"For Dean," Cas replied.

He could see Sam hesitant as he pulled out his wallet money, an uncertain look across his features. "Cas," Sam began, voice raised more than usual, "are you sure- I mean Dean's pretty, you know."

A frown tugged as Cas's own lips as he tilted his head to the side, continuing to stare at Sam. He really didn't understand, though it wasn't like he often did, when it came to the Winchesters the words they said were rarely what they meant. For example when Dean said fuck me, it was rarely ment litteral, and instead meant he was frustered with himself, the same for fuck you. It rarely meant literal, and was said when Dean was frustrated with Cas.

"No, Sam I don't."

Another hesitation came from the other, before Sam gave a tight smile. "I'll buy them if you think it's a good idea."

"I do."

Dean leant against the side of the impala, a smile spreading across his face as he watched Cas appear form around the corner, Sam at his side. The angel had a smile across his face, the kind that crinkled the corners of his eyes, and lit up his whole face, then kind Dean saw so rarely, but absolutely adored.

"Hey," Dean greeted as the other two approached, his own lips tugging a smile, eyes still on Cas. "You guys have fun?"

"Uh yah," Dean looked to his brother, his frown faltering at the hesitation in Sam's voice. His brother's features sat in uncertainty, lips in a frown, eyes darting across Dean, hand fumbling with the sleeve of his jacket. What the fuck had happened. "Cas- he got you something."

Dean looked back to Cas as the other stepped forward, raising his hand to offer Dean a small bisexual flag.

Shit.

Dean looked from the flag back to Cas's face, then to the flag, then around the empty streets. He wasn't sure where to look, nothing seeming to calm the twisting feeling in his stomach, or the sudden hammering of his heart, so loud he was sure Sam could hear it. Cas could definitely.

Fucking angels and their super hearing.

"Uh thanks," Dean finally mustered.

Despite his words Dean didn't move, Cas's head tilting as Dean continued to stand frozen. "Do you like it?"

He could feel his heart burn in pain as Cas's once wide smile dropped, his blue eyes still burning against Dean in an intense stare. A mix of emotions spiralling through his head. Guilt. Anxiety. Hate.

He'd checked the streets seconds ago, it was just the three of them.

No one would see. It would be okay

A hesitant breath parted Dean's lips as he raised his hand, forcing himself to take the flag from Cas's grip, his gaze staying locked on the other. "Yah," Dean said, a smile spreading across his face, matching Cas's.

They were so close.

No one other than Sam around.

He could do it.

Without a second thought Dean lent forward, pressing a quick kiss to Cas's cheek. "I love it."

#Destiel #Destiel fanfic #destiel fic #dean winchester #castiel #fic

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tiredb0igivemesugars · 4 years

Text

I’m a little bit more weird than you thought.

Hello again! I know I promised a more happy one but this has been sitting in my notes for months and I just had to get it out. I don’t want to offend anyone with this, I get why one would see this as offensive, so I apologise in advance!

TW: for possible self loathing talk (idk) and internalised ace phobia.

Summary: Spencer and Derek have a complicated relationship, best friends but yet so much more. ”We looked at each other a little too long to be just friends.” They both clearly like each other, but the problem is that Spencer hasn’t been honest with Derek. After Derek makes a suggestion to take things onto the next level, Spencer shuts off, he starts having nightmares because he’s afraid of telling the truth. What if Derek doesn’t like him anymore after he finds out? But Spencer likes him so much… maybe it’ll all go away with time. Spencer decides on keeping his secret, thinking it’ll all go away, but his plan gets ruined when Derek starts asking questions.

It had been 3 weeks since Derek said it. It had been 3 weeks since Spencer had an actual conversation with Derek. It had been 3 weeks since Spencer slept properly. After Derek had suggested that maybe Spencer would like to take things to the next level in the bedroom, Spencer had stormed out. Of course not like actually stormed off, he made a pathetic excuse to leave and he never looked back.

Spencer knew that it was wrong and that he couldn’t say anything. He knew that it wouldn’t be just an okay type of thing, but he didn’t want to talk about it, he couldn’t. Derek had made many efforts to get Spencer to open up, but he wouldn’t budge.

When Spencer started “dating” Derek, (they hadn’t actually put labels on their relationship) he knew that it was a conversation that needed to be had, but he wasn’t ready for it. The first couple of days after the incident were an odd time for Spencer, he didn’t necessarily feel out of place, but there definitely was a knot somewhere inside of hime that kept him from being okay. He couldn’t really sleep, it really wasn’t that bad, his brain just wouldn’t shut up when it came time to go lay down. But after a week or so, Spencer started having nightmares.

The dreams mainly consisted of Spencer finally coming clean, but maggots would come out of his mouth and the maggots would eat him alive. Or the other version where Derek found out and left Spencer, and sometimes, it was both. After two weeks Spencer stopped trying to sleep, he figured that he might use the time he tried to sleep to something actually useful.

But if you go a week without sleeping, it starts to show, even if you were Spencer Reid. Everyday, multiple times, people were asking if he was okay. Everybody knew that Spencer wasn’t sleeping, but no one knew why.

So from that week of not sleeping flash forward a couple of days, the team was on their way back from Texas when the story took a turning point. “Reid you’re coming to my place with me after this,” Derek said as he walked past the said boy into the jet. ”Like the hell i am,” Spencer though to himself. There was no way Spencer was going home with Derek afterwards. “I’m not coming with you,” Spencer said as he sat down next to Derek. “Reid, like it or not, you’re coming. You need to tell me what’s going on in that beautiful head of yours.” Derek said.

He had no idea why Spencer stormed out on him but he needed to know. He loved Spencer to bits and pieces and seeing him in such distress for such a long amount of time was starting to take a toll on him.

The younger wanted argue, and even to make a scene in front of his coworkers, but he decided against it, instead he settled with a quiet “Oh did you lose your fucking balls? Try that alleyway, I heard squeaking from there,” he said and pointed in a random direction, Now, it sounded a lot better in his head but there was no going back down now. Spencer directed his concentration back to a book he was reading, pretending not to notice the silence that had fallen over all of his coworkers. yes, all of them.

You see, Spencer never swore, he never would even talk to someone the way he had just spoken to his best friend, but he was on edge. Everyone was constantly pushing his buttons, trying to make him spill the beans but he couldn’t, he wouldn’t let it happen. He felt as if no one would understand him, he knew the statistics but they can’t really comfort you when you’re convinced that no one will accept you. The smart part of his brain was trying to tell him how the team didn’t say jack shit about Emily being bisexual, but this was different. And just like that, an IQ from 187 to 60. Spencer was, at least in his mind, broken in some way. At least Emily experienced sexual attraction, to both genders, but Spencer didn’t feel any towards anyone. What if it made Derek feel like he was unattractive, because that certainly wasn’t the case.

Spencer didn’t even notice that he had fallen asleep until he was woken up, “Spencer, wake up, we already landed,” Derek said as he shook Spencer awake. Confusion clear in Spencer’s behaviour, Derek continued, “You fell asleep shortly after your little outburst, which I would also like an explanation for thank you very much. But now, get your skinny butt off that seat and come with me,” Derek said, offering Spencer his hand. He took it.

“I’m sorry,” Spencer said when they drove away in the car. Derek seemed to relax a bit after that. “I-i know we need to talk but I have no idea what to say,” Spencer confessed. “Pretty boy if it was something I said back then, I’m sorry, I don’t know what made you react that way, but I’d like to know, and hopefully we can work through it,” Derek said and took one hand of the steering wheel to grab Spencer’s hand.

The younger took a deep breath, trying to figure out what to say, he had never been in a situation like this where it’s purely emotion, no logic, at least in his mind.

“I don’t think this is something we can work through,” he finally got out. A burning feeling made its way to Spencer’s throat, that same feeling also invaded his eyes after what he had said.

Spencer sniffled before a tear made its way down his cheek.

By this point Derek had already grown incredibly worried and gone way past the legal speed limit. “Hey baby, I’m sure it’s going to be alright, we’ll be home in a couple of minutes. Why don’t we talk there? Let’s just calm down for now,” Derek said and brushed his fingers over Spencer’s thigh. By the time they were home, Spencer already had multiple tears running down his cheeks, he was scared to death. He didn’t know why he was scared, but he recognised the feeling as fear. The next 10 minutes would determine the future of their relationship, if there even was one. Derek led the younger of the pair to the couch in the living room and waited for Spencer to sit down before following behind himself. “Talk,” that was all Derek said. Shortly after he realised that Spencer wouldn’t be able to talk at all for awhile, the said boy was far too upset, nearly hyperventilating on the couch. “Hey calm down, I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think, there isn’t anything in this world that would make me love you any less and you know that, i’m here for you so talk. Tell me what has been bothering you so much lately,” Derek said, waiting for Spencer to say something.

Derek watched as Spencer struggled to pull himself together, furiously wiping his tears away and taking deep breaths. “T-the reason I stormed out that one night is that,” he begun but had to take a break. ”Oh fuck for fucks sake it isn’t supposed to be this hard, pull yourself together,” Spencer stated more to himself than Derek. he took another break before continuing, “I-I swear it doesn’t have anything to do with you it’s just I’m a little bit more weird than you’d think. You see, I think I might not be able to feel sexual attraction. You’re welcome to leave me though, I won’t blame you,” he finally got out.

Derek honestly wasn’t so shocked, “Hey Spencer, why on earth would I want to leave? I love you and I don’t care about that stuff so much,” he said and reached for Spencer. The younger man quickly found himself in Derek’s arms, feeling relieved. His secret was out to the world, and so far, Derek was still there. ”Baby do you mind if we talk about it?” Derek broke the silence. Spencer shrugged, he didn’t necessarily really mind, he just couldn’t see what there was to talk about anymore. He said what he needed to say and that should be the end of the discussion.

”I’d like to know what you’re okay with and what’s not okay,” Derek said softly. Spencer sighed, “I suppose,” he said. Spencer played with Derek’s fingers as he collected his thoughts. ”I don’t know what I like. I guess kissing is nice and cuddling. But that isn’t very sexual either,” he wondered out loud. Derek listened as Spencer talked. He knew when he got in a relationship with Spencer that something would be different. But different was okay. Different was good.

#moreid #spencer reid #derek morgan #criminal minds #cm #male x male

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the-hilda-librarians-wife · 4 years

Text

The Mistakes We Made - Chapter Fifteen

Summary: When her high school girlfriend comes back to town after two years with a baby and a terrible story she won’t tell, the Librarian has to deal with the feelings she had worked so hard to keep at bay.

Notes: I’m... not very proud of how this chapter turned out writing wise, but you’ve been around for this long, I don’t think you’ll leave me now. Also the bisexuals are taking over this fic I’m not sorry

Read it on ao3: (chpt1) (chpt2) (chpt3) (chpt4) (chpt5) (chpt6) (chpt7) (chpt8) (chpt9) (chpt10) (chpt11) (chpt12) (chpt13) (chpt14) (chpt15)

There was a loud gasp in the playground.

“You’re the kid who lives in the cemetery, aren’t you?!”

There was no answer. Another voice spoke.

“Is it true that your mum’s a witch? My mother said she’d steal my videogame if I didn’t go to bed on time.”

This time there was an answer, after a small pause. “That is stupid.”

The voice wasn’t of anyone Johanna knew. She looked behind her, away from the group of girls she had befriended in her two years at school, and looked at the swing. There was a small, pale girl swinging gently on it, her dark hair waving back and forth with the wind on her face. Around her, a group of other kids seemed to have gathered around.

Excusing herself from the conversation, Johanna walked to them. Those kids were obviously being mean, and Johanna didn’t want this kid to be upset on the first day of school.

Just as she got closer, another one of them spoke up. “I heard she put a curse on Mr. Wright and that’s why he is sick. Do you put curses on people as well.”

The new girl just kept swinging, completely ignoring the question. But Johanna walked up to them and put her hands on her hips, trying to look serious. “Hey! You are all being really rude. Leave her alone!”

The group of kids turned to look at her, confused that she’d give them an order even though she had no power over them. But then, the new girl planted her feet on the ground and stopped swinging, turning to them.

“You better do what she asked.” She said, calm to the point it was unnerving. Afraid of all they’d heard about the girl, the other children nodded, wide eyed, and walked away.

The dark haired kid watched them go away, hoping that they felt her eyes on their backs. Then, she turned to the girl who had stood up for her.

“Thank you for that. But it’s okay, I wasn’t being bothered.”

“Well, but I was.” Johanna sat down on the swing by the girl’s side. “That was no way to talk to anyone.”

“You’re very kind.”

Smiling at the compliment, she tried to continue the conversation. “Thank you. You are new, aren’t you? How old are you?”

The girl nodded. “I am five. My mum had been homeschooling me.”

“Five?” Johanna put her hands together in joy. “Me too! We’ll probably be in the same class! What’s your name?”

“Maven.” The girl answered, Johanna thought it was a very nice name. It sounded mysterious, kind of like her.

“Nice to meet you, Maven. I’m Johanna.”

_#_#_#_

The two of them only stopped hugging when Hilda made a gurgling sound, calling for attention after being on her stroller for so long. Both of them had drawn back at the sound, and smiled at each other one more time before Johanna got up to see what she could do for her child.

While she was distracted, Maven picked her cellphone to check the time, but something else called for her attention. There was an unread message from Mr. Kavindi.

“Good morning Maven, how are you? Not too sore, I hope. Please tell me if you need anything and do come over for tea if you’re feeling up to it!”

She could see out of the corner of her eye that Hilda insisted on wiggling in her mother’s grip, and she looked up to smile sympathetically at Johanna, who chuckled.

“I think she wants to go outside.” Johanna said, trying to find a position that made Hilda calmer. Her daughter didn’t like to stay inside for too long. Over the weeks she’d been there, she’d taken many strolls on the cemetery with the child, and even though Johanna admitted to having been creeped out, Hilda had enjoyed herself. Maybe she’d grow up to be one of those people who liked scary things. Like Maven. The thought made her happy.

The librarian got up and straightened her coat. “Well, we did just receive an invitation for tea. I say we all deserve it, really.”

_#_#_#_

They walked side by side on the streets, the sound of their steps and the wheels of the stroller merging together, the cool morning air adding a slight blush to their cheeks. Since she’d come back, Johanna hadn’t left Maven’s house much, and ever since she’d tried to talk to her parents, she’d been as discreet about Hilda as possible, afraid that someone would try to take the child from her as a result of Torrin’s lies. But now, she pushed the stroller in front of her almost proudly. She didn’t care, nor did she worry, about what they thought. The two people who truly loved her were by her side, and lucky for her, no one but her former husband had ever seemed willing to pick a fight with Maven.

“Anna?” Maven hugged her coat tighter around herself to keep in her warmth, and Johanna hummed in acknowledgment. “About what you told me earlier. That I don’t… fight for people. What do you think I should work on to solve that?”

Smiling at the ground, Johanna tried to hide her pleasure at realizing that Maven had, indeed, taken her worries seriously. This was something she’d wanted to talk to Maven about ever since they were very young, but she hadn’t thought she’d want to hear it.

“Well, I’m afraid that this whole town pariah thing made you have some trouble with communication. And connecting with other people’s feelings, so maybe you should focus on that.”

Maven chuckled self deprecatingly. “Yeah, I had already noticed the communication thing.”

Making her stop walking with a gentle hand to her arm, Johanna locked their gazes. “But I have to say that you seem to be improving so much in this aspect. I was very proud of you today.”

Maven pulled the hem of her coat over her hands, a nervous habit that Johanna easily recognized, her eyes looking down at the ground and then up again.

“Says a lot that you have to praise me for acting like a human, doesn’t it?” She muttered, making Johanna sigh.

“Which brings me to another thing you might want to pay attention to.” Johanna started walking again, letting Maven to follow after her even though only the librarian knew the way to where they were going. Her eyes were just a little wider than normal and her back was straight as an arrow, showing Johanna that she was paying listening closely.

“Self esteem.”

Maven blinked and frowned at her. “Wait, what?”

Smiling, Johanna continued looking forward, following Maven when she crossed a small street. The block they were walking by was filled with colourful little houses, each with a garden in front of them.

“Have you ever heard the quote ‘we accept the love we think we deserve?’”

Maven scrunched her nose. “Isn’t that a song?”

Rolling her eyes, Johanna shot her a very level look. Even if she wasn’t perfectly aware that with the amount of books she read, it would be almost a miracle if she didn’t know, at this point in her life Johanna could recognize Maven’s tone when she made an awful joke.

“Yeah, I’ve heard it. By Stephen Chbosky, I think.”

“Exactly. Well, I’ve always wondered if maybe you never thought people could like you because you never liked yourself.”

It was a strange realization to come. Sure, she knew perfectly well about all the things she hated about herself. She knew she’d always considered this friendship, the truest one she’d ever had, to be more than she deserved, but she’d somewhy never connected these things to low self esteem. Gods, I need a therapist.

“Thank you, Anna.” She smiled, her face hiding nothing even though it was so used to covering every emotion. “I’ll think about that.”

Johanna only had time to smile back at her before they heard a cheerful voice from one of the houses.

“Girls, you’ve come!”

They turned their heads to the cubby man waving at them from his front door. Mr. Kavindi seemed to have come back to his usual joyous self, in contrast with how tense and worried he’d been the night before. Maven was happy for the change; she wouldn’t want to be the reason his mood was dampened.

He stepped down his house and crossed the garden in order to open the metal gate for them. Johanna got in first , and thought he tried not to stare, Kavindi couldn’t help himself but grin at the adorable child who was taking everything in from the stroller. He’d heard Torrin’s version of the story of how Johanna came to be at Trolberg again, of course. Everyone had at this point. But since Maven hadn’t wanted to talk about it, he knew practically nothing about what was actually going on. He wasn’t about to press them for information, though. He’d know in time.

He shot a worried look at Maven when she closed the gate behind her. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m okay, sir. Thanks to you.”

He blushed with the acknowledgment, but made sure to brush it off. Anyone would have done the same, he said. He then let the trio inside his house, where Maven had already been three or four times, and his wife greeted them as well, beckoning them over to a table with tea and cookies. It would ruin their lunch, for sure, but it would be worth it.

The atmosphere was cozy and welcome. The Kavindi household was colourful, peculiar trinkets covering every surface. The table had been set in front of a window which had a view to a tiny backyard, where Johanna noticed they had planted strawberry bushes. She imagined that’s where the homemade jelly on their table came from.

She’d been reluctant, at first, to agree to this visit, wondering if the couple would try to pry too much into her life. But contrary to what she’d been expecting, the two of them acted perfectly polite, at the same time that they were extremely welcoming. They didn’t ignore the fact that she’d been away for so long, making her questions about when she’d be back at college and how taking care of Hilda was, but not once did they touch more delicate topics, and for that she was grateful. They even managed to talk about what happened in the party the night before without focusing too much on Torrin.

As Johanna had brought all the essentials for caring for Hilda in a bag in the stroller, they were able to remain with the couple for a long time. At one point, Erica even asked for permission to pick Hilda up, and took her outside to point out all the different species that she and her husband had planted together.

While the two of them were outside and the women were sitting with Mr. Kavindi on the sofa, to where they’d moved after some time, Maven’s eyes fell to a portrait sitting on a shelf, side by side with a variety of books. There were two men in it; one was the librarian, and she realized she knew the other as well.

“Hold up.” She got up from the couch and picked the picture from the shelf. “That’s my college’s dean, isn’t it?”

Although she’d had little trouble recognizing Mr. Kavindi, seeing as she saw him very often, it was harder to do so with the dean. They were much younger, close to Johanna and Maven’s current age. Mr. Kavindi hummed in agreement and smiled.

“That one is from college!”

Johanna walked closer as well, wanting to see the image. “That’s him, then?”

“Yeah.” Maven nodded. “I never did ask you why he was indebted to you.”

He snorted. “It’s not like he was ‘indebted’ to me.” He gestured as he spoke, making quotation marks with his fingers. “One day he joked that he was, and I’ve never stopped saying that he was. Trust me, he helped you because he saw your potential, not because of some moral obligation.”

Delighted with the compliment but not letting it show, Maven lifted an eyebrow. “That doesn’t really answer the question.”

Shifting in his seat, he blushed, though there was a smile on his face. “He owned me one for kissing him first.”

The two women stared at him. The corners of Maven’s lips began to lift up, and she was pretty sure that Johanna was slack jawed.

“What, you didn’t think you were the only ones in this town, did you?” He joked in good nature.

“Sometimes it feels like it.” Maven muttered somewhat awkwardly, as she was trying to contain a smile. “What happened, if I may ask?”

She put the frame back on the shelf, sitting down next to him again, though Johanna remained standing.

“Well, I met the woman of my life.” He smiled and gestured to the back garden, where his wife was playing with Hilda. “But we remained very good friends.”

“I had no idea that you...” Johanna didn’t finish the sentence, turning her attention to the picture again.

“Most people don’t.”

“In this case, we’re very honored.” Maven sat straight on the sofa, finding a deep and unfamiliar sense of comfort in knowing that she could relate to someone she admired so much in this way. “You didn’t have to tell us, but I’m thankful you did.”

“My girl, I just want you to understand something.” He wanted to put his hand on her shoulder, or even hug her, offering her physical comfort aside from just emotional. But he knew that Maven didn’t appreciate physical contact from many people, so he kept his hands by his sides on the sofa. “You are never as alone as you think you are.”

Maven was in the process of understanding what he meant when Johanna spoke up.

“Hold up.” She turned to them, arms crossed. “How did you know about us?”

Maven’s eyes widened as she realized Johanna had a point; she had never told Mr. Kavindi about her relationship with Johanna and much less about her sexuality. He snorted playfully and tilted his head.

“Adorable how you two think you were being any subtle.”

_#_#_#_

It was a bright Friday afternoon, and Maven was giddy with excitement. Most people wouldn’t be able to tell so because she mostly kept it to herself, a bright contrast with the girl at her side, who was making the most of her walk, trying to keep her balance as she walked on the lines where two pieces of cement met or jumping over cracks in the sidewalk. She had been looking forward to this since the moment she and her friend had scheduled the meeting, the day before. She’d picked Johanna up at her house, and now was leading her to the lovely place her mother would sometimes take her.

“Won’t you tell me where we’re going?”

Maven smiled mischievously. “Not yet.”

Putting her hands on her hips, Johanna scoffed. “Well then, Miss Mysterious. Could you at least say why this had to be this weekend? You were pretty insistent.”

“The classes come back on Monday.”

“I know. What of it?”

“Anna, it’ll mark five years of our friendship!” She said happily. She had to admit, she was quite proud of herself for remembering this. And of course, she wanted to do something to celebrate. To show Anna how happy she was that they were still friends after all this time.

“Oh gosh, it does!” She clapped her hands in front of her and then leapt to hug her friend. “That’s amazing!”

“It is.” Maven hugged her back. “If you really want to know, I’ll tell you the place I’m taking you to. Not much longer until we get there, though.”

Drawing back, Johanna nodded enthusiastically. “Please!”

“It’s called the Poet’s Retreat. It has the best coffee ever. Mum doesn’t let me have too much, though. She says it’s bad for our growing.”

Smiling, Johanna squeezed Maven’s arms. “I already know I’ll love it.”

_#_#_#_

The day was getting darker by the minute as the sun sank lower. Johanna had suggested they got takeout, and considering t he that her friend was usually the one who cooked, Maven hadn’t objected. She deserved the rest.

This was the reason why now they were taking a different route from before. Leaving the Kavindi’s house to go to their chosen restaurant, they had to head closer to the city center, though still trying to avoid a few streets in particular. For the time being, Johanna didn’t want to risk meeting her parents.

After a while, the blocks became familiar to Johanna as they entered the area she had been more used to when she lived in Trolberg, and so the two of them somewhat switched into automatic mode, not thinking about where they were going, just letting their feed guide them to where they wanted to go and allowing their minds to drift away. After all that had happened in the last twenty four hours, after all they had said to and been told by each other, their thoughts were truly crowded.

It was this distraction which made them not realize where they were until the Johanna had trouble fitting the stroller in the narrow passage between a cracked, waterless fountain and an unkept flowerbed. In the middle of wondering how she’d maneuver that, her eyes widened. She looked around, truly seeing the place at last. They were in the middle of a small park, crossing it as a shortcut to the restaurant. Wild flowers grew widely there, taking over the all but abandoned place.

Maven, who’d been just about to offer help, saw the moment Johanna’s face changed with recognition. And that was when she, too realized where they were. Just like years ago, the sky was beautifully painted with purples and oranges, the sun’s last beams being filtered by the treetops. She immediately turned her head to a spot nearby, on the shadow of a tree, where she knew celosias grew during the warmer months.

The place where they’d first kissed.

A chill ran down Maven’s spine, a mixture of anticipation and anxiety as she felt Johanna’s eyes stare a hole in the back of her head. It brought her a strange feeling to look at this place so long after it had happened. They were so different now, and they couldn’t deny it. They had suffered, they had grown; their core was the same, but so much had changed that they could almost be completely different people. And yet, one thing remained the same. They were still terrible at staying away.

“We won’t be able to just be friends again, will we?” Maven whispered with her heart beating furiously against her chest. It was making her somewhat nervous, to feel Johanna’s unwavering gaze on her, but flattered at the same time. They were surrounded by wild beauty, and still she chose to look at her.

“We will, if we really try. But that’s not really what we want, is it?”

Johanna took a step backwards; she’d worry about getting the stroller through the passage in a minute, or maybe they’d pick another path. She walked to Maven’s side, and parked it just beside her.

“No.” Maven said softly, her eyes still glued to that spot. Only when she felt the touch of Johanna’s hand on her shoulder did she come out of her transe, turning to her friend with a slightly labored breathing. Her curls were shining in the little light that remained, and the shadows accentuated the gentle curves of her face. Twilight still looked beautiful on her.

“I don’t think-” Johanna stopped herself from finishing. Words had power, even over oneself. Maybe if she reacquainted herself with speaking with conviction, she’d learn to have confidence again sooner.

“I’m not ready for a relationship yet.” She began again. “But I can’t stand the idea of a future without you.”

Maven stared into her eyes for tense seconds, her brow furrowed and her lips parted with what looked to be disbelief, before she quickly rose on her heels and pressed an urgent kiss to Johanna’s mouth. Her bony hands flew to Johanna’s hair, as if trying to hang on to her, and Johanna hugged her hips close. It felt almost nostalgic, like they’d been offered a second chance. And they would make sure to make it right this time.

It was a while before they fully parted, the sky almost completely dark now. They leaned their foreheads against each other’s, breathing together.

“Good.” Maven said. “Because neither can I.”

They were smiling so much that their cheeks hurt as they drew back. Maven felt like laughing, even. No, she was not over Johanna, and there was nothing wrong with that. They would learn to grow together, to heal together, to live together, because the alternative of being apart was simply too terrible to picture.

This was not their happy ending. They’d still need to work hard to get there. This was their happy beginning, this was an opportunity to make an effort to get there. And Maven knew that, as long as she had Johanna by her side, she’d love every step of the way.

#fic: tmwm #my fic #sketchbook ship #sketchbook ship hilda #hilda librarian #hilda librarian fanfic #Hilda's mum #hilda johanna #hilda johanna fanfic

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thinkingaboutyoungroyals · 5 years

Text

Lost Boy (Chapter 5: Learning New Things)

Summary: When his family moves from San Francisco to the town of Shadyside, T.J. thought his life would change. And it did. He just didn’t think it would come in the form of the ghost of a boy who haunted his new bedroom.

Prologue

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4

Tag list:@delicatesleeper,@ibroughtachallah,@frenchtohste,@alittletooliteralleah,@tyrusmagocious,@tjskipping, @mirrorslover, @opatrickr, @lesbianrelateddeath,@mirrorslover,@opatrickr, @justkimberley, @burning-hot-pan,@green-lemonboys, @anotherangelfromspace,@thebisexualweirdo,@likelightning-inabottle,@thedampjofangirl, @fizasdr, @awkward-bisexual-alien, @whipashwhipash, @abg-blah, @atthemomentimintothis, @emberofthefrost

.........

Sweat rolled off his back and forehead while his lungs burned from the exertion. Every muscle in his body was tight and ached. And his cheeks were red and heated.

It felt good.

A whistle rang in his ears just as he caught the ball passed on to him.

“Alright! Ten-minute break and we’ll dive right into a mock play!” announced the Coach.

T.J. tossed the ball into the nearby cart, gave Buffy’s friend (a guy named Marty) who was his partner for the drill a fist bump, and headed for one of the benches by the bleachers where he left his bag. He rummaged around for his water bottle and took a generous gulp. The cold water soothed his throat, cooling him down.

“Hey, T.J.! Great job out there!” Andi had come down from the bleachers, Libby behind her.

He smiled at her. “Thanks. You think I’ll make it?”

Libby made a few signs in ASL. Unfortunately, T.J. wasn’t familiar with it yet but Andi or Walker often interpreted for him.

“Libby says they’ll be crazy not to let you in! And I agree with her! You’re a natural!” Andi grinned

“Thanks, guys. That means a lot.”

He turned his head to see what the others were doing and spotted Buffy talking to Marty nearby.

Perfect.

He lifted a hand and made his voice as loud as possible. “Buffy! Hey!”

The curly-haired girl turned her head, catching sight of him. She waved back and jogged over, the brunette boy following behind her.

“’Sup, Kippen?” she grinned. “You really gave Marty a run for his money!”

“Hey! He has longer legs so he’s naturally faster!” the boy protested.

T.J. laughed and turned to Andi, whose smile had dropped slightly. He pretended not to notice and gestured to her.

“This is Andi and Libby, by the way. Andi and Libby, this is Buffy. And Marty.”

“From the party,” Andi blurted out before blushing. “Sorry, force of habit.”

Nonetheless, Marty laughed and Buffy’s lips twitched in amusement. T.J. wondered what the story behind that was.

Andi managed a small smile as she turned her attention to Buffy. “Hi, Buffy.”

Buffy returned the smile, rather sadly. “Hi, Andi.”

He could practically feel the tense electricity in the air. Even Libby looked a little awkward, her gaze moving from Andi to Buffy and back to Andi.

T.J. pretended to look confused. “You, guys, know each other? Oh, wait, Andi. This is the Buffy you were talking about?”

“Well, there’s no one else at this school named after a famous vampire slayer,” Buffy joked.

It made everyone laugh and, for a moment, the atmosphere was a little less tense. From the outside looking in, they probably looked like a group of good friends.

If only that were truly the case.

When the laughter died down, the awkwardness returned. Andi and Buffy couldn’t look at each other in the eye. Libby was staring at Andi, her hands twitching like she desperately wanted to say something. And Marty kept his gaze on the floor, though his arm made its way over Buffy’s shoulder.

“Well, this is great!” T.J. forced perkiness into his tone, cringing at how fake he sounded. “We should all hang out! After tryouts? We can go to The Spoon.”

He grinned expectantly at everyone, even showed some teeth. If Cyrus could see him now, the ghost would no doubt laugh in his face because he was clearly trying too hard.

Instead of the enthusiastic agreement that he was hoping for, the tension only grew. Buffy looked a little hopeful but still, she didn’t say a word.

“Um, Libby and I are actually helping Walker with a mural later,” said Andi, softly.

Beside her, Libby nodded in agreement.

Buffy’s face fell as she looked away, refusing to meet their eyes. “And Marty and I already have plans. Sorry.”

T.J. felt his heart sink. “Oh…”

Meanwhile, Marty cleared his throat. “Maybe another time?” he offered.

T.J. nodded. “Yeah, definitely.”

Another awkward silence fell upon them as he racked his brains for something to break it. He wished he had something, anything, to get them to start talking.

“Uh, I need to go to the bathroom,” Buffy announced, already turning away. “I’ll see you, guys.”

“Sure,” T.J. replied.

He, Andi, and Libby just watched as Buffy and Marty walked away from them and through the door to the locker rooms. Sighing, T.J. turned back to the two girls.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I didn’t realize…”

Andi shook her head. “It’s okay. I mean, it’s not like Buffy and I don’t like each other anymore. It’s just…we lost touch. She became preoccupied with sports and I wanted to concentrate on art.”

And the silent third thing was there: there was no Cyrus to glue them back together, anymore.

T.J. wished he could offer more comfort, given the knowledge he had about their friendship. But, he could only keep his mouth closed and look sorry as much as he could.

After all, they didn’t know that he knew exactly why they stopped talking.

……….

After tryouts, he headed to The Spoon Diner. Amber was working there as a waitress now. Her shifts were after school, three times a week, from 4-7pm, which meant that T.J. could stop by and get free food when she was working. It was one of those days and he really needed some comforting junk food in his system.

He spotted his sister’s blonde ponytail taking orders at the bar counter so he settled on a stool there and patiently waited.

Amber finished with her customer, spotted him, and walked right over.

“Hey, twerp. How were tryouts?” she asked.

T.J. glared at the insulting nickname before grinning. “I think I did pretty great! I’m definitely in!”

“Oohh, sounding confident, aren’t we?” Amber raised an eyebrow. “When do you know the results?”

“Monday. But, I know I’m definitely in!”

“Aww, I’m proud of you.”

Amber reached over to ruffle his hair and T.J. recoiled, slapping her hands away.

“Can you just get me some food? I’m hungry.”

“I don’t hear the magic word.”

“Now, please.”

Amber rolled her eyes but lifted her pad and pen to take his order. “What do you want?”

T.J. shrugged. “Don’t know. Never been here. What’s good?”

“The baby taters are pretty popular. And the milkshakes.”

He raised a brow. “What are baby taters?”

Amber chuckled. “Their version of a tater tot. But, it’s really good, almost everyone orders it.”

“Then, I’ll have that. And a chocolate milkshake. To go.”

She lifted her eyes from her pad. “You’re not staying?”

“Nah, I’ll just head home. Cyrus probably wants to know how it went.”

And just like that, his sister’s smile dipped into a frown. “So, you’re actually helping that ghost?” she asked in a low tone.

T.J. shrugged. “Yeah.”

Amber’s hands fell on top of the counter, clutching the edge tightly. “You promised you wouldn’t do this anymore. You said you wanted a normal life, yet you’re back to the same old routine again?”

“It’s just one ghost,” T.J. defended. “And it’s not anything dangerous, either. I’m just helping his friends make up again, that’s all. Nothing illegal, no breaking and entering, and no trip to the police this time. I swear.”

“And what if the other ghosts find out and they flock to you for help?”

“Cyrus promised me he wouldn’t tell the others. He told me he doesn’t talk to them anyway.”

Amber steeled her gaze. “And you believe him?”

“Yes.” T.J. returned her look, stubbornly refusing to back down. “I trust him. And he trusts me.”

Well, he didn’t know, exactly, if Cyrus trusted him, but what else he could say to get her to drop the subject and accept his decision?

And, besides, Cyrus had declared them friends and told him many things about himself (except for the way he died, that was still a well-guarded secret and mystery). That meant he trusted T.J. even just a little, right?

Amber continued to stare him down, in big sister mode now. She may support his abilities but she never did approve of his activities, which mostly stemmed from the trauma with Emily. She didn’t trust ghosts, no matter what.

“I’ve never seen you act like this towards a ghost before,” she stated, her brow furrowing. “Normally, you’re detached. You treat it like a job you hate. But with this one… you’re different.” She narrowed her eyes. “Do you like him or something?”

Immediately, T.J.’s cheeks flushed, caught off-guard. “What?”

“Is he your type?” she pressed.

“What are you talking about?” T.J.’s entire face burned, including his ears.

“I need a picture of this boy. What was his name again?”

“Amber!”

“Never mind. I’ll find out, myself.”

Without another word to him, she spun on her heels and headed towards the kitchen. “I can’t believe my brother has a crush on a ghost,” he heard her murmur before she walked through the doors.

Groaning, T.J. dropped his head on the table.

Amber was just being ridiculous. He didn’t have a crush on Cyrus! Sure, he thought he was kind of cute and endearing, but T.J. barely knew anything about him!

And, besides, Cyrus was a ghost! It would never work out! As soon as T.J. finished helping him with his unfinished business, he was going to move on and disappear from the Earth forever. T.J. could not afford to crush on a ghost, it would just all end in heartbreak.

Feeling a presence settle on the seat next to him, he lifted his head. Amber was beside him, no longer wearing her hat and apron.

He raised his brows, questioningly, at her.

“I’m taking my break,” was all she answered.

T.J. rolled his eyes. “If you’re just trying to find out if I have a crush on Cyrus, I don’t. Okay? We’re just friends. He’s not interested in me in that way and neither am I.”

His sister didn’t look like she believed him. Instead, she took out her phone and quickly typed and furiously scrolled, not looking at him. Finally, she found what she was looking for and turned the phone around.

It was a Facebook account - a private one but the profile picture was clear as day in revealing who owned it. And the smiling image staring back at him was of the same boy who lived in his bedroom.

“Is this him?” she asked.

“H-How did you…?”

“I can ask mom questions, too.”

“You texted her?! What if she was in the middle of a lesson?!”

“If she was, she wouldn’t text me back.” Amber flashed him a pointed look. “So, there aren’t many Cyrus Goodman’s who live in Shadyside, just this one.” She raised an eyebrow. “So? Is this him?”

T.J. nervously swallowed. “Y-Yeah,” he admitted.

Amber hummed as she looked at her phone again. “I guess he’s kinda cute. Not my type, but he’s got a certain charm to him. I can see why you want to help him.”

“Amber, his looks have got nothing to do with my helping him, okay?” T.J. sighed. “I just feel bad. He’s obviously stuck and doesn’t know why. I’m just trying to help. And he’s really nice, not like the others. They’re always demanding me to do things for them but Cyrus? He never asked for my help. I offered it. And he’s not making me rush either. I just… want to help him.” He sighed again. “I don’t even know if I can help. So far, my plan to get his friends to talk again didn’t work. It’s like they don’t even know what to say to each other or how to start a conversation.”

Amber puffed her cheeks, indicating that she was actually thinking deeply about something.

“Maybe… they just need something to remind them of their old friendship,” she suggested.

“Like what?” he asked.

“Things like… the place they met… or a place they frequented… maybe an activity they often did together.”

T.J. didn’t know what those were but he could always ask Cyrus.

“… or maybe old photos? Those can always make you remember the good ol’ days. Never underestimate the power of nostalgia.”

T.J. pursed his lips. “I guess I could ask Cyrus.”

Amber gave him a worried look. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

He appreciated her concern but he already made up his mind. He nodded. “Yeah, I’m sure.”

Sighing loudly, Amber nodded. “Alright. Just be careful.” She got to her feet. “Your order should be done soon. I’ll go check.”

She affectionately patted his cheek before leaving. He smiled after her in gratitude.

For all of her hatred of ghosts, his sister still came through with offering him advice.

……....

He had to admit. The baby taters were addicting. They were lightly salted and the grease stained his fingers. He never cared about tater tots before but, for some reason, he just couldn’t stop eating them.

T.J. stared forlornly at the Styrofoam box sitting on his desk that was once filled to the brim but was now half-empty, only around six tots left. He should go on a jog tomorrow morning because he was pretty sure he gained quite a bit just from that. All he wanted was a snack but Amber gave him the huge serving and he didn’t know whether to thank her or curse her.

As he reached over to take another piece, he caught a shimmer from the corner of his eye.

As usual, Cyrus was sat on his desk, smiling and waving. “Hey, T.J.”

The blonde let out a chuckle. “No nickname today?”

Cyrus shrugged. “Couldn’t think of one.” When he looked down and saw the box, his eyes lit up. “Oh my god! Are those baby taters?!”

“Yeah? Want some?”

T.J. almost kicked himself. Of course, Cyrus couldn’t have some! He was a ghost!

Thankfully, Cyrus just laughed. “No, thanks. I’m on a diet.” He looked on with a sad smile at the tater tots. “These were my favorite. Andi, Buffy, and I used to get a huge order and share them. And I would do tater theatre!”

Raising a curious brow, T.J. asked, “What’s tater theatre?”

The question seemed to light up Cyrus’ entire face. He proudly straightened up. “Only the best and most entertaining show in Shadyside, presented to you by the wonderful Cyrus Goodman.” He gestured to the baby taters. “May I?”

Confused yet curious, T.J. gave him the go-ahead with a simple nod.

Excitedly, Cyrus picked up two of the tots. “High School Musical or Camp Rock?”

“Uh… High School Musical?”

The ghost grinned. “Excellent choice. So, today’s installment of tater theatre presents, High Tater Musical!” He lifted a tot. “From the moment Troy Bolton and Gabriella Montez met, they had no idea that it was going to be the start of something new…”

T.J. watched in total astonishment as Cyrus re-created the entire movie using only the tater tots and his voice. It was the most ridiculous display he had ever seen in his entire life.

He loved it.

He clapped loudly when Cyrus finished and the boy blushed yet gave a little bow.

“Thank you, thank you! I’ll be here all night!”

“That was... wow.”

“Not exactly an adjective but I’ll take it!”

T.J. grinned as he picked up a tot, dipped it in ketchup, and popped it into his mouth. “And you did this all the time?”

“Only when I felt inspired. Which was a lot.”

If any of those were just like the one he just witnessed, Cyrus’ friends probably had a grand time watching them.

“So, aside from baby taters, what else do you like?”

It didn’t take long for the boy to answer. “Chocolate-chocolate chip muffins! They’re the best thing in this world! Aside from baby taters, of course!”

“I’m learning new things about you everyday.”

Cyrus cocked his head to the side. “What about yours?”

“My what?”

“Your favorite muffin.”

T.J. pursed his lips in thought. “Hmmm… Blueberry macadamia.”

Cyrus made a face. “That doesn’t exist!”

“Of course, it does! There’s this bakery back in San Francisco that makes really good blueberry macadamia! We went there all the time!”

It was one of the very few things he missed about San Francisco, but he could live with it.

The ghost looked at him, suspiciously. “I’ll believe it when I see it.”

T.J. opened his mouth to answer but stopped himself on time. He had been about to tell Cyrus that he would take him.

What was he thinking?! Of course, he couldn’t take Cyrus to San Francisco! Ghosts were normally tied to one place and Cyrus was tied to this town. They couldn’t just go on a road trip to San Francisco… could they?

“But, you know, if you dip the baby tater in your milkshake, it tastes like heaven. Or, that’s how I imagine heaven to taste like.”

T.J. blinked, confused, but Cyrus was staring at the little container of ketchup on his desk.

T.J.’s chest twitched and he lifted a hand to scratch at it. “Sure, I’ll give it a shot.” He opened the top of his milkshake cup and dipped a baby tater in before taking a small bite.

As soon as the cold sweetness combined with the light salty taste met his tongue, his eyes widened in shock.

Cyrus looked utterly delighted when he dipped the tot in a second time.

The simple things really did make the ghost happy. “So, how were tryouts?” he asked, leaning back as he playfully kicked his legs back and forth.

T.J. wiped his hands on a napkin. “Pretty great! I’m definitely in, but I don’t find out for sure until Monday.”

“You’re in. I just know it!”

T.J. smiled, feeling warmth take over his body as he was filled with gratitude for the boy’s support.

He waited for Cyrus to ask about Buffy and Andi but he didn’t. Honestly, he wasn’t looking forward to telling him that his plan failed. He hoped Cyrus wouldn’t be too disappointed.

“But, my plan… didn’t actually work,” he stated, slowly.

Cyrus frowned. “Your plan?”

“For Buffy and Andi. They barely talked! It was so awkward!”

“Oh.” Cyrus nodded, his eyes falling to the floor. He did look disappointed but not surprised. “That’s okay. You tried your best.”

T.J. didn’t like that forlorn look on his face. It just didn’t suit him.

T.J. scooted his chair closer to the boy, placing a hand on his knee.

“Don’t worry. I’ll keep trying. This isn’t the end.”

Cyrus managed a small smile at that. “Thank you.”

T.J. nodded. “So, I talked to my sister about it. And she said maybe they’ll talk if something reminded them of their friendship. Like, maybe the place you guys met?”

“Second grade. Jefferson Elementary. It’s only a couple of blocks from the Middle School.”

“Where did you guys hang out a lot?”

“The Spoon. Red Rooster since Andi’s dad owns the place. And, sometimes, Cloud Ten. That’s the Salon on Main, Andi’s mom owns it.”

T.J. pursed his lips. “Now, how do I get them both in all those places? They wouldn’t even go to The Spoon with me!”

Chuckling, Cyrus shook his head. “I don’t know. I mean, everyone hangs out at The Spoon, they’re bound to run into each other there at some point. And wouldn’t they find it weird if you asked them to go to the Elementary School? They don’t even know that you know me. Unless you told them you found pictures of us or something.”

T.J.’s ears perked. Pictures.

“Do you have any?” he asked, the wheels in his head turning.

“Any what?”

“Pictures! Of the three of you! Maybe if I show it to them, they’ll remember they were friends. And they’ll…” He looked at Cyrus, trying to decipher his expression. “Remember you. And the times you guys shared.”

Cyrus bit his lower lip, seeming like he was struggling with a thought.

It only then occurred to T.J. that, obviously, Cyrus wouldn’t have any photos. At least, not here. His whole room was cleared out with almost everything when his parents sold the house to T.J.’s mom. And he didn’t really feel like breaking and entering into Cyrus’ parents’ new place - those days were behind him.

He was about to apologize when Cyrus nodded.

“I do. In the closet, there’s a loose floorboard. I used it to hide some things. I’m sure they’re still there, no one else knows about it.”

With Cyrus’ approval, T.J. got up and went over to the closet. Crouching on the floor, he pushed sneakers and boxes aside.

“It’s towards the back,” Cyrus called out.

T.J. crawled further in, rapping his knuckles against the wood. Finally, he heard it – a hollow sound. Using his fingernails, he jiggled and pried the wood loose, lifting it up and setting it aside. Inside was a blue shoebox, a little frayed but still intact. Taking it in his hands, he crawled back out of the closet and placed it on the floor. He crossed his legs underneath him.

Cyrus appeared across from him, the box between them.

“You can open it,” the boy said with a nod.

T.J. nodded back before removing the top. His eyes met a stack of photos placed neatly on top of a little blue notebook. He carefully took out the stack.

The beaming face of a young Cyrus standing in between a young Buffy and Andi stared back at him.

“Wow, you guys were adorable,” he said, unable to stop himself from smiling.

He flipped through them, each one showing a new memory, a new stage of Cyrus’ life as the three gradually got older and older. There were photos of them in Halloween costumes, at The Spoon, at birthday parties, on bikes.

In almost all of them, Cyrus was always in the middle, always sandwiched in between the two girls who clearly adored him and whom he adored in return. They were a huge part of each other’s lives.

T.J. arrived at the last photo of the three friends at what looked like a pizza place, a fourth person standing next to Cyrus.

“Jonah Beck,” T.J. stated, staring at a much younger-looking version of the boy from his English class.

“Yeah.” Fingers gently grasped the edge of the photo as Cyrus reached over to take it from his hold. “This was taken the year before I died. The Space Otters won their final game of the season.”

T.J. didn’t know who the Space Otters were but he dared not interrupt to ask.

Cyrus continued to talk, “Jonah gave me the MVP award and an honorary Space Otter member t-shirt. It was a fun time.” He smiled at the photo, fondly. “That was when I…”

The ghost trailed off, looking like his mind was far away now.

“When… you?” T.J. tried to ask, his curiousity piqued.

Cyrus looked up at him, meeting his eyes. The brown orbs looked conflicted, like he was trying to make a decision.

“You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to,” said T.J., immediately. “But, I may not be the son of three psychologists and a life coach, but I can still listen.”

At that, the other boy broke into a smile. “Yeah…”

“I promise I won’t judge. Well, unless you think the ‘The Last Airbender’ live-action movie was great. Then, I’m sorry but I have to judge you.”

Cyrus finally laughed. “Never. I have some taste.” He quieted again, lips pressed tightly in thought.

T.J. decided to look through the photos again, giving the other boy time to decide and get comfortable.

There were a couple of pictures of a young Cyrus, Buffy, and Andi on the swings and a few more recent-looking ones, too. They must really like the swings. T.J. recognized the playground it was on, he passed it often whenever he took a shortcut through the park on his way home from school.

And Cyrus wore a lot of sweaters and button-ups. T.J. couldn’t judge his fashion choices. He, himself. only wore hoodies, after all.

And Cyrus could dance? There was a photo of the three in fedoras and sparkly jackets mid-dance on a dance floor at some kind of huge event. He didn’t strike T.J. as the type, but then again, there were many things he didn’t know about Cyrus.

“I’m gay.”

T.J.’s head flew up so fast that he thought his neck had snapped.

Cyrus wasn’t looking at him. His eyes were firmly set on the photo he still clutched in his shaking hands.

“I’m sorry, I kind of sprung a big one on you,” he continued, his voice breaking. “I just… I know we’ve only known each other for maybe three weeks but I feel comfortable talking to you and I feel like you won’t judge me. But… please don’t think I’m weird or looking at you or something like that because I’m not, I swear. I respect your privacy and if you want me to leave any time, I-.”

“I’m gay, too.”

It was Cyrus’ turn to almost snap his neck as he looked up at T.J., mouth open in disbelief.

T.J. flashed him a gentle smile. “Hi.”

Cyrus’ mouth opened and closed. “I… You… Really?”

T.J. nodded.

“And you’re just… telling me? Just like that?” the boy continued to ask, still sounding unsure.

T.J. shrugged. “I’m not exactly out everyone but the people who matter already know the truth. There’s Amber, my mom, and, now, you.” He smiled again. “I trust you, Ghost Boy. And you can trust me.”

For a beat or two, Cyrus was quiet as he continued to stare at him like he had two heads. And then, he let out a breath – one that was full of relief.

And, T.J. wondered: how long had been hiding it? How long had he been keeping it all in? How long had he been holding his breath with no way to release it?

“I do,” Cyrus said, smiling at him, his brown eyes shining with unshed tears. “I trust you.”

T.J.’s heart was suddenly beating so fast that he feared that it would jump out of his chest. He recognized this feeling. He had only felt it once before and never thought he would again. At least, not right now. And not towards a ghost. But, maybe he had been trying to deny it because Cyrus was a ghost.

Shit. Maybe Amber was right.

#andi mack #tyrus #tyrus fanfic #tyrus lost boy

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jokerfan99 · 5 years

Photo

Insult to Injury (RWBY/RVB) by Necroceph

*RVB Opening Theme*

On the Blue Base's roof

Church: The fuck are they doing over there?

He's right, what on Earth are the Red's doing. Through his rifle's scope, he sees the Reds building something on their roof what appears to be, a signboard?! First the stink formula, now this? Who's giving them these stupid ideas anyway? Hey don't look at me, I'm just the narrator!

Caboose: Hello!

Out of the blue, no pun intended, Caboose pops up into Church's view.

Church: Aaaaah! Goddammit, don't scare me like that! Caboose: Sorry. Whatcha watching? Church: Check this out.

Church gives Caboose a peak through the scope.

Church: I don't know what they're building, but it looks like a signboard. Caboose: Signboard? Aww, not another highway advertisement! Church: Who knows what they're using it for. My guess is Sarge just wanted to write something to mock us, that's for sure. Caboose: Or maybe they're planning to advertise their products so that they can earn a quick profit. Church: What? Who the fuck would be buying their junk? Not us of course. Caboose: Maybe Sangheili's passing by in the atmosphere? Church: Guess we'll have to find out ourselves. By the way, what are you doing up here? Caboose: Oh right! I'm here to tell you that Weiss is awake! Hooray! Church: It's about time that Ice Queen wakes up. Here take the rifle, I'm going to have word with her. Caboose: Uhm, Church, what about me? Church: I don't know just... spy on the Red's construction I guess. Call me out if anything new comes up.

At the Blue Base, Weiss' Room

I'm never going near another trash bin for a week. Weiss thought to herself as she takes another sip of her coffee, specially prepared by none other than Kaikaina. Weiss gotta hand it to the Grif, this is one hell of a caffeine.

Kaikaina: You want Dr. Kai to get you some meds? Weiss: No no, I'm perfectly fine. No need to concern yourselves over me. I've been through worse situations before. Tucker: Schnee, you passed out since yesterday! I doubt you're still fine. Kaikaina: Yeah. Plus you even puke while you slept. Weiss: I beg your pardon? Kaikaina: Nothing!

The door opens as Church enter to see Weiss fully recovered from her sixteen hour coma.

Church: Good to see the Snow White has awaken from her deathly slumber. Tell me, did the 'Prince of the Holy Sword' kiss you? Tucker: Wha-? No way I wouldn't do that while a chick's old cold! Though I would if she wants to... do you, baby?

SMASH!!!

Weiss hits Tucker with her mug, shattering it in the process. Even with his helmet on, he somehow felt the pain in the side of his head.

Tucker: OW! I was just saying! Weiss: At least learn how to shut that perverted mouth of yours, Lavernius! Hmph. Church: Not as perverted as suggesting a tight bikini wrestling match yesterday. Weiss: *shiver* Don't bring up that idea again. Tucker: So, Church. I'm guessing this isn't just to check up on her, is it? Church: Nope. In fact I'm here to talk about her fight with the Red yesterday. Tucker: Oh that one. Man it was awesome! Church: I'm not talking about that! From what I saw, she and that Red seem know each other. Is that right, Schnee?

Everybody turn their heads to Weiss.

Weiss: I don't want to talk about it. Church: Well too bad, we are going to talk about it whether you like it or not. So what were you two before, best friends? Tucker: Rivals? Kaikaina: Lovers?

Everybody looks at Kai.

Kaikaina: What, was I really the only one thinking that when they were fighting? Tucker: Speaking of lovers, were you two bisexu- Church: Shut the fuck up Tucker! Look just explain from the beginning, don't care how long, just say it. Weiss: ... Fine if that's to prevent you guys from asking me again and again in the future, so be it. Did I told you guys about the a military academy I studied at before I came to Blood Gulch? Everyone: No. Weiss: Of course. Anyways, me and... that girl, were for a lack for a better word, partners. Kaikaina: Hell yeah, I knew you guys were lovers! Church: She's not referring to that kind of 'partnership'! Weiss: Our relationship was somewhat great if you could say that. Not the brightest girls I know, but she was alright once you get to know her more. Kaikaina: Kinda reminds me of this girl I knew before coming here. Tucker: She a friend? Kaikaina: Nah we fucked, literally. Tucker: Woo baby! Weiss: Would you mind? Tucker: Sorry. Church: So how did your relationship go downhill? Weiss: Oh you would not believe what I've been through. One day, we were posted at this base on a planetoid as part of our final assignment. I think it's called Amity. Anyways the job was simple, follow your superior's orders and make sure no unathorized personal gets in. Everything was fine for the first week. Soldiers talking around, complaining about the weather, you name it. Tucker: Is it me, or does this story sounded familiar? Church: Shh! Weiss: Me and my partner weren't together most of the time there cause we were given two different orders. She patrols around the base while I sit in the server room, keeping away not only unauthorized intruders but 'undisciplined' hands as well. I mean who would be watching porn in a state of the art archive machine? Not only are they disgusting like Tucker,- Tucker: Hey! Weiss: -but they have arrogantly ignore their duties and- Church: Schnee? Hate to remind you but, this isn't a therapy session. Weiss: Sorry. Anyway, I kept away undisciplined hands from the server room.

Transition fade to flashback

Amity guard 01: Oh come on honey, just one download. Pleeeeaaaassee! Weiss: No. Amity guard 02: Look kid. There's nothing to do but standing around here and talk all day. Some of us have already died of boredom! Weiss: And since when did that happen, 'sir'? Amity guard 02: Uhm... last Tuesday. Weiss: That incident? He didn't die of boredom! He just slipped and broke his neck upon impact. Plus he's still alive! I can't believe you all here. You're supposed to be soldiers fighting for your government and still you act like conscripts from the past! Amity guard 01: Hey don't blame us, blame human nature.

And that's when the base shooked. Space pirates. One of the guards I talked to started panicking.

Amity guard 02: OH MY GOD, WE'RE BEING ATTACKED! WE'RE DOOMED!!!

Every guard in the room rushed out until the commander called me. He ordered me to collect all the data to prevent them from falling into enemy hands, so I did what I was told. Once I got the data, I was to rendezvous at the landing bays to be evacuated. On the way to the bay, I came across my partner along with some guy she's carrying over he shoulders.

Weiss: Ruby, what's going on? Ruby: I don't know! Some guys just came out of nowhere and start blowing up the place. Command ordered us to fight back before reinforcements arrive. Weiss: Well go and stop them. Ruby: We can't! These guys are heavily armed and we're loosing a lot of men! Our top priority now is getting everybody out of here! Weiss: Command's new orders? Ruby: Nope. Weiss: Then who's order is that? Ruby: Uhm... mine? Weiss: WHAT?! Ruby: Look just help us out and we'll explain to command later. Weiss: I can't, I have to get out of here! I'm carrying the base's data and is highly important that I evacuate immediately. Ruby: What?! What about everyone here? We can't just leave them to die here!

That's when I got shot in the arm. My partner started fighting the intruders back while I run off to the landing bays to keep the data safe. It was miracle the landing bay wasn't attacked yet and so I manage to escape safely. The data was secured but the base, not so much. We've lost half our men that day and everything stored there was either looted or destroyed.

Transition slide out of flashback

Tucker: So... what happened afterwards? Did you get a medal? Weiss: I did. They gave me a Colonial Cross for my bravery. But after what happenedback there... sigh... I didn't manage to get the scores I needed. THANKS TO HER THAT IS! Church: Is that why you're pissed at her? The scores? Weiss: You have no idea how important it was to get those scores and our pride! If she hadn't just followed her orders and stop those pirates. Things would've gone smoothly! But nooooooooooooo! She just had to disobey her orders and started evacuating people as many as possible. If she had rally them to fight instead, everything would've gone different! DAMN HER! I'M GLAD SHE DIDN'T GET A MEDAL OF HONOR! AND DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S WORST? SHE CALLED ME A DESERTER. DESERTER! I WAS ONLY DOING MY DUTY! ARRRGH! I'm sorry I got carried away again. Once I recovered my wounds, she renounced our partnership right at my face! Well that's good for me. Hmph! Church: *whistle* This is a lot like my relationship with Tex. So what will you do now that you and her saw one another? Weiss: Something I've should have done long after we split. DESTROY HER!

Weiss pulls off her most angry face, but not as fierce Ruby's demonic anger but still... *Suspenseful stinger music*

Weiss: Nonono, that method is just too simple. Hmmmmm... or maybe!... nonono, torture's too barbaric. Tucker: Wow she really is pissed with that Red. Church, if you're still pissed at Tex, would you guys try to forgive each other? Church: Yeah right! That bitch isn't the type of girl to say 'sorry' to anyone, even me! Kaikaina: Plus she's a Red. Tucker: And your brother? Kaikaina: Wha? I won't kill him. Weiss: But he's a Red. Caboose: Psst! Church?

Church hears Caboose's voice as everyone else were busy talking to each other. He turns to see the private peeking behind the door. Wonder why he isn't coming inside, no matter at least he may have some update on the Red's construction. He leaves the room and hears what Caboose has got to say.

Church: What's the update on the Reds? Caboose: Oh it's fine, but it's just... let's not let Weiss see it. Church: Why? Caboose: Well the thing is... do you know those times when teenagers drew something about their teacher just to mock them? Church: Yeah kids have become total assholes these days. Wait what does this got to do with the sign... Caboose:... Church: ...You're not saying what I think you're saying? Caboose: Weiss won't like it! She'll cry if she sees it! Church: Why would she cry... look wait here and give me back my sniper rifle. I'm going to take a look at it myself.

Church leaves Caboose and heads straight to the roof. With him gone, it's time for our beloved Caboose to check on Weiss.

Caboose: Hi, Weiss! Weiss: Hey, Michael. Where's Church? Caboose: Oh he just needed to take a potty. A potty! Hehehe. Weiss: At least he should tell before he left... so you're saying you won't kill your brother? Kaikaina: Duh we're family! If Mom finds out I shot him, I'd be in serious trouble. Tucker: How is she gonna find out? It's not like she's can hear her son's scream light years away, that's physically impossible. Kaikaina: Actually she can. Tucker: Wait she can- Caboose, you okay buddy? Caboose: What? Tucker: Dude, you're staring at the ceiling. Is there something wrong? Caboose: Nothing! Nothing involving the Reds and Weiss won't have to be devastated. Church from the roof: Pfft-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Caboose: Uh oh. Kaikaina: Holy shit! What is that?! Tucker: Giant hyenas? Weiss: As if! Get out, I need to change immediately!

On the Blue Base's roof

The Blues arrived to the scene to see Church collapsed on the floor. He is laughing uncontrollably like a madman from an asylum, why is he laughing? This put a lot of confusion to the Blues, except Caboose who knows what Church has seen at the Red Base.

Weiss: Church, what are you laughing at? Church: Oh Schnee, you're here. Hehehe... nothing to worry about, there's totally nothing to see... pfft! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! HOHOHOHAHAAAAA!!! Tucker: Is Church alright? Caboose: Oh yes, he's alright! He's... uh... infected with laughing disease. Very contagious but not lethal. Tucker: Laughing disease? I've never heard of it before. Caboose: That's cause you're dumb!

Weiss, curious to see what's on the enemy base, take out her binos and see this signboard. To her disgust, the first thing she sees through the binos was a familiar red colored rifle and brunette hair look straight at her. Ruby is looking back at her. She lowers her gun to reveal her angry expression before pointing at something out of the bino's vision. Weiss zooms out and finally sees the 'so-called' signboard and something drawn on it. The first sight of it widened her eyes. It was a drawing her except... it doesn't match her beautiful petite physique. The drawing of her is an ugly round doodle with the writing, 'BIG FAT MEANIE' next atop. As if she really looks like that! Then there's another drawing of three stickmen with stink-lines above them, still being drawn by Donut, with the title friends is added above them. This must be represent Ruby, and her two other teammates. Oh my she's gone too far.

Caboose: Oh no. Weiss seen it. Tucker: Seen what? Church: Hahaha! Take a look.

Tucker looks through the sniper's scope and starts to instantly laughing upon seeing the signboard.

Tucker: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Big fat meanie! HAHAHAHAHA, that's priceless! Kaikaina: Big fat meanie? Let me see.

Kaikaina gets the same results.

Kaikaina: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! Tucker: I know right? HAHAHAHA! Caboose: Uhm, guys? Weiss is still here. Church: HAHAHA- Son of a bitch. Tucker: HA- Oh fuck me. Kaikaina: HAHA- Whoops.

Weiss was standing still. She may have heard the commotion behind. The first thing that came in the Blues' head is Weiss screaming at them like the banshee she is till their ears popped and bleed. However to their relief she still keeps her composure.

Caboose: Weiss? Are you okay? Weiss: Get the rocket launcher. Caboose: Okay. Church: Hold on, what are you doing? Weiss: Giving her an example not to mess with me.

At the Red Base

Grif: Will you hurry up? This isn't Ancient Renaissance! Donut: Patience. Art need to be clean and refine, so you can't rush it. Grif: I doubt that's art. Sarge: This ought to give that psychological attack to that Blue. Once she sees this, the guilt will force into her and break her from the inside. Ruby: Thanks, Sarge. You didn't have to do this for me. Sarge: Ah don't mention it. And besides, what that Blue did is UNACCEPTABLE! Hehehe, I wonder what kind of reaction that Blue's going to get when she see this. Simmons: Sir. I think you take a look a this. Sarge: Looks like she's pissed off already.

Ruby and Sarge approached Simmons who had been looking at the Blue base. Simmons hand the rifle to Sarge and the rough Sargeant looks through the scope to see the results of the deserter. To his disappointment, Weiss hasn't gone barmy and it looks like she just fired a rocket... A ROCKET?!

Sarge: CRAZY COWBOY ON A NUCLEAR BOMB, GET DOWN!!!

Everybody ducked following a loud WHOOSH passing them by. That was close! Had that rocket hit the concrete, it would've cause a lot of dama- never mind. The drawing, which Donut had worked so much on, is now a large ripped hole!

Donut: NOOOOOOO!!! I haven't painted it yet! Ruby: GGRRRR... WEISSSS!!! Sarge: Dagnabbit, you destructive vandals! You may have spared the signboard but you should never have taken out the drawing!

Back at the Blue Base

That shot put a smile on Weiss. Sure the rocket didn't exploded as predicted, but at least the rocket got rid of the tarp.

Weiss: That's what you get, Rose. Okay so who's up for breakfast? Everyone but Church: Me!

Caboose, Tucker and Kaikaina rush down the stairs, leaving Weiss and Church alone on the roof.

Weiss: Did I just provoked the Reds and caused another attack? Church: Kind of, though I doubt most of them have the mood to attack today. Heh, you know you sure kinda remind me of Tex. Weiss: Who? Church: My girlfriend. The way you acted and talked is somewhat like her, except she more of a crazy bitch than you. Weiss: Girlfriend huh? I don't hear you talking to anyone through the lines. Church: That's cause she's dead. Weiss: Oh... I'm... sorry. I didn't mean to. Church: Nah it's alright. We broke up a long time ago. Sigh, I still miss our arguments. But enough of that, let's get some grub. So you can cook? Weiss: A bit. My butler back home taught me a thing or two about making steak. If you got the meat of course. Church: Well hate to break it you, but we only have canned food. Wait you're rich?! Weiss: Yeah but not the life you'd expect.

A/N: That's the end of this story arc, now that you know why Ruby and Weiss now hate each other. Sorry it couldn't be longer.

#Red vs Blue #rwby #monty oum #Rooster Teeth #weiss schnee #ruby rose #michael j caboose #leonard l church #franklin delano donut

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justwritethatdown · 5 years

Note

Ahm. .39 please? Thanks!*

39. “Please come home, I miss you”

First of all thank you so much for sending me this, it was my first prompt ever! I really hope you like it, it came out way longer than I expected

WARNING: this was written listening to ‘Lover’on shuffle, so read it at your risk

Mostly based on Taylor Swift’s ‘False God’ but honestly it’s inspired by Taylor swift in general

Words count: 4809

Rating: I’d say a light M, there’s no smut but sex is mentioned and implied many times, also there’s a bit of cursing…

We still worship this love

Beca was on her first (of many, hopefully) Europe tutor. After signing with DJ Khaled two years before, her career in pop music took a leap and she had published two albums already, the first one took her around the US for a sold out tour that set the ground for her second one to be a worldwide success, which lead her to Paris, Nice, Rome, Milan, Berlin, Dublin and currently London. She had still two cities in the UK before moving to Holland, Spain and finally head back home, home where her girlfriend was waiting for her.

Since they got together Beca and Chloe had spent more time apart than in the other’s presence; the two best friends had very recently found the words and the courage to talk about what their feelings for each other really were and Beca had to leave for her tour almost immediately after that.

Beca didn’t really think about the consequences when she wrote a painful song about pinning / unrequited love, way too detailed for Chloe or any of their aca-friends to have any doubts on who the person she wrote it for was, and the release of said song as the first single of her newest album lead to their group chat blowing up for a day straight and a sobbing redhead showing up to the front door of Beca’s apartment in the West Village. Beca feared the worst at the sight of her friend that upset about her feelings, but she soon found out that those feelings were the same ones Chloe had bottled up for as long as the brunette did.

They spent the night together, kissing and exploring each other’s bodies, learning how to please one another, discovering how it felt to be with a woman and how it felt to be with someone they both had spent years fantasizing about. In the morning, when Beca woke up curled up to Chloe’s naked back and realized it wasn’t just another one of her dreams, she felt an happiness she’d never felt before, it was like she’d been asleep for this whole time and she was just now seeing the daylight.

She felt the redhead stretch in her arms and turn to face her with a soft, calm smile “good morning” she whispered before gently kissing her “I love you" answered Beca after their lips parted, which caused Chloe to kiss her again, more firmly. It wasn’t the first time any of them phrased her feelings like that, they shared many ‘I love you’s during the night, but it still sounded new to them and made both of their hearts burst out of happiness. When their kiss came to an end Beca pushed back a little to be able to look at Chloe, the golden morning light illuminating her face and body made the petite girl think she didn’t want to see anything else for the rest of her life. Just Chloe.

The group chat was still blowing up, ignored from the both of them until then. “Oh my God, when are they going to calm down?” groaned Beca and Chloe giggled shifting under the sheets to reach for Beca’s phone on the nightstand before going back to snuggle into the brunette, she made sure to cover every ‘indecent’ part of their bodies before snapping a selfie of them and sending it to the Bellas chat “DUDE!” gasped the brunette grabbing her phone but it was too late, the photo was delivered and their friends were already starting to completely lose their minds about it. “Why did you do this?” she whined staring at her screen filling with celebrative messages and a ‘FUCKING FINALLY! Pun intended 😏😏 ✂️✂️✂️✂️’ by Stacey that made Beca’s mouth fall open and go incredibly dry, while she was blushing in horror and embarrassment. “To answer to all their questions at once” explained Chloe taking the buzzing device from Beca’s hands and abandoning it somewhere on the bed before starting kissing along the brunette’s neck making her inhale sharply “yeah, o-okay but… we better put this away" she observed escaping from the redhead’s arms and putting her phone back on the nightstand “…unless you want to send them a video too" she joked with a fake annoyed voice that made Chloe giggle and move to straddle the brunette “Nope. This is just for us" she purred pushing her back on her back, looking at her with the sweetest sexy expression Beca had ever seen. She’d never wrapped her mind around the fact that Chloe could be so incredibly hot and adorable at the same time, it took her breath away.

“I have to take off next week” sighed Beca sadly; they were still laying on her bed on top of each other, Beca’s right ear near Chloe’s navel while the fingertips of her left hand traced random paths on her abdomen “I know…” huffed Chloe, gently stroking dark locks of hair.

Suddenly Beca sat up straight startling the other girl a little “we can do this, right?” she asked panicking “hey…” whispered Chloe sitting up and cupping Beca’s cheek “…I’ve waited too long for this to let it go now, we’ll make things work" she assured her “I want to be with you and a couple of weeks apart won’t stop me" she added “it’s almost a month Chlo… with different time zones and-“ Chloe cut her off with a kiss. Beca was always the pessimist between them and the redhead was used to having to convince her things were gonna be alright, but this time she felt like her life depended on that. “Listen to me, do you trust me?” she asked “always” answered Beca without losing a beat “then would you close your eyes and just jump in this with me? I know it’s gonna work, I feel it" she begged her touching her own chest “can you do it for me?” she added swallowing, it was barely whispered, so quietly that Beca wouldn’t have heard it if Chloe wasn’t basically sitting on her lap. The brunette delicately wrapped her fingers around her wrist, gently tugging at it and lacing their fingers together “I would die for you" she assured looking into the watery blue eyes in front of her with such a seriousness that let Chloe knew she really meant that, it made her chest rise and a hint of a smile appeared on her face “please don’t ever do that" she breathed out resting her forehead on Beca’s.

“We were crazy to think Crazy to think that this could work Remember how I said I’d die for you? We were stupid to jump In the ocean separating us Remember how I’d lie to you?”

Things went downhill pretty quickly when Beca left. The two girls were just in the honeymoon phase of their relationship and only the fact of not being able to be all over each other the whole time was enough to drive them crazy. To worsen the situation Chloe had her finals at vet school and Beca had those goddamn paparazzi following her everywhere.

The petite girl was always very closed up and kept her personal life super private, she never thought about officially coming out because it was nobody’s business and she couldn’t see why that mattered. She told her friends she was bisexual a few years ago and was pretty sure her father always knew. None of them made so much of a deal about it, as it should be, but the most obsessed fans were speculating on her sexuality and constantly talking about the fact that choosing George Michael’s ‘Freedom! ’90’ as a debut song was a pretty clear statement and her not mentioning a man in the single nor in the whole album just increased their theory about her being gay. Some of them even guessed the song was about her former college friend and co-captain Chloe Beale, stating that they always had good chemistry during the Bellas’ performances, but they were wondering why she wasn’t on tour with her (like if she had nothing else to do with her life). So yeah, everyone was up in her business and she hated it. They were constantly taking pictures of her making up stories about her and Theo or her and some member of her security team or her and some random people she didn’t even know.

Beca and Chloe were constantly fighting about nothing; their conversations usually started with the right foot, but as soon as one of them said something that wasn’t exactly what the other wanted to hear things escalated quickly.

“are you still or already awake? These time zones are messing with my brain. Anyway I just got to the hotel room after the concert, I really wish you were here with me right now" lamented Beca through the phone “how’s the study going?” “ugh it’s so boring, please come home, I miss you” whined Chloe in response “baby…” sighed Beca heavily “you know I can’t do that, there’s a contract and… and even if there wasn’t one, there’s people who’s been waiting to see me for months, they look forward to this! I can’t let them down like t-“ “you mean you don’t want to” interrupted her Chloe. Beca wasn’t that keen on the idea of having screaming people who worshipped her and would do anything to see her, but she felt the sense of responsibility that came from all of that and she didn’t want to disappoint anyone. After a pause Beca cleared her throat and replied “no… no I don’t want to, that would be rude and unprofessional.” “of course you don’t” stated the redhead “why should you? You’re living your best life, sorry for being so boring that I have to study to be a vet and can’t be your groupie” “excuse me? My what now!? Where did that come from?” exclaimed Beca outraged.

“And you can’t talk to me when I’m like this Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you You’re the West Village You still do it for me, babe They all warned us about times like this They say the road gets hard and you get lost When you’re led by blind faith Blind faith”

After not getting a response she scoffed “you know what Chloe? I can’t talk to you when you’re like this. Call Amy or Flo… see whoever’s in New York and go get some fresh air because these fucking finals are driving you insane" “yeah sure, blame it on my exams, on the fact that I’m stressed out, say what you want. The truth is that our lives are different, you should just break up with me… I’m just a burden for you, you should be out there enjoying your celebrity life" Beca knew Chloe wasn’t serious about that, that she was just trying to provoke her for some reason, to scare her maybe, and in all honesty she succeeded. Only the thought of not being with Chloe, to lose her, knocked all the air out of Beca’s lungs ‘Chlo, you know you’re everything to me, don’t say things like that please’ was what she wanted to say, but instead what came out of her mouth was “bullshit! Stop throwing your fucking insecurities at me Beale, it’s not my fault if you think that of yourself” and then hung up.

She knew she screwed up, if Chloe was insecure about their relationship her job was to let her know how solid it was, how deep her feelings for her were, not to yell at her like that, but Beca was like a wild animal (a rather small one, like a raccoon or one of those flying squirrels) and as such she tended to bite when bothered. Fighting with Chloe was the absolute worst, no matter who ‘won’ the fight, she always ended up wounded or at least bruised, it pained her to hurt Chloe just as much as it did when Chloe hurt her. She knew it was the situation they were fighting, that they didn’t really mean any of the things they said during their fights, but it hurt all the same.

Aubrey warned them, she flown all the way to New York, sat them down one evening before Beca left and told them it would have been hell, that they would have been frustrated most of the time, that Beca would have hated the tour and Chloe wouldn’t have passed her exams as brilliantly as she could have. But they (Beca actually) fought her about it, explaining to her how what they had was stronger and different and that they would have been okay, that she knew that. Chloe’s heart felt so full seeing her girlfriend, who was so pessimistic about it only a couple of days before, so sure about them; just because Chloe promised her that morning they spent in her bed. And she believed her, she believed her like people believed in God, with no proof, just blind faith.

“I’m not saying that I have doubts about your feelings for each other, I saw this grow before my own eyes, I’d be a fool to doubt that. I’m just saying that this is the worst way to start a relationship. You should wait until the tour is over and you’re both in the same city again" stated the tall blonde standing in front of them in a power pose with her hands on her hips “Aubrey, I feel like I’ve been waiting for my whole life. I can’t wait anymore.” At that confession Beca made looking into Chloe’s eyes Aubrey let her arms fell on her sides with a sigh “okay. But don’t say I didn’t warn you"

“But we might just get away with it Religion’s in your lips Even if it’s a false god We’d still worship We might just get away with it The altar is my hips Even if it’s a false god We’d still worship this love We’d still worship this love We’d still worship this love”

The night after the fight Beca was a wreck and her concert wasn’t as good as the others. When Chloe read about it on the online gossip magazines she felt terrible. She hated it when Beca was upset and knowing the reason was her, destroyed her. She wanted to support Beca and celebrate her and be there for her, not bring her down and less than anything she wanted to set her free like she told her the other night. When she knew Beca had arrived in Manchester she sent her a text

Hey babe, give me a call when you’re settled? Promise I won’t pick up another fight. Love you xx (♡C)

Love you too (-> ♡C)

Was all Beca replied, she was tired from the sleepless night and still grumpy from the fight but she appreciated the message and didn’t want to make things worse by ignoring it or replying something stupid. Chloe took her reply as a win, at least the brunette still felt like letting her know she loved her.

Chloe let out an heavy breath running her fingers through red locks, she couldn’t wait to tell Beca how sorry she was and how much she loved her. The sudden buzzing of her phone made her jump and then smile “hey b-“ “I was an idiot” Beca’s voice through the phone interrupted her and she raised her eyebrows in surprise “I don’t know why I always do this” continued the brunette “maybe it’s some sort of self destructive behaviour or maybe the trauma from my parents’ divorce” she scoffed “but anyway… I tend to break the things that I love, but I won’t do that to us. I-I don’t wanna hurt you, like… ever! It’s the most painful thing for me to do. And I don’t want to lose what we have” she stopped to take a breath and Chloe took the opportunity to jump in “Becs that’s… that wasn’t your fault, I’m the one who should apologise for being an idiot and saying stupid things” “Chloe… you and me, that’s my whole world. That’s what I should have told you instead of snapping at you okay? I should have told you that I count the days and the miles that separate me from you and even if this life is crazy and exciting, I don’t want it if I can’t share it with you" “Beca…” “and I am so proud of you for graduating at vet school baby, don’t ever think I’m not, okay?” she added with a soft voice “Beca I love you so, so much. I don’t… I don’t know what to say y-your speech was…” sobbed the redhead “you don’t have to say anything I just needed to make sure you knew exactly how I feel" “I do. I know how you feel because it’s exactly how I feel Beca, I-I love you more than anything in the world and I just want to make you happy” Chloe wasn’t crying anymore but she still struggled to keep her words even “you do, more than anything” answered Beca with a smile.

They talked for hours until Beca had to leave to get the last things ready before the sound check “have fun baby, I love you" “oh I will, Amy is coming to see me, she asked me three VIP passes and I’m not sure what to expect from her… oh by the way she said she’s streaming the whole thing live on her Instagram… so you can try to watch some of it maybe? Though I know it’s a crazy time for you so if you’d rather sleep is okay, don’t worry" “I wouldn’t miss it for the world” said Chloe before hanging up.

“Hi guys, thank you all for coming! Uhm… I know most of you have the setlist for this and I promise you, I’ll sing all those songs, but tonight I wanted to open with a song for my girlfriend” at that the fans went crazy, some of them screamed so hard that Beca feared for their vocal chords. When the crowd calmed down a rearranged version of ‘The Only Exception’ by Paramore (that Beca had mixed in half an hour before the concert) started playing.

After the concert Beca found a lot of texts from her friends who had apparently been watching Amy’s live:

BECA THAT WAS ACA-AWESOME OMG SO ROMANTIC!!! 💕💕💕😻 (Legacy)

I love you. You’re worth the risk too baby ♡ call me when you can, I’ll be awake (♡C)

I am proud of you Mitchell! And for the first time, I’m glad I was wrong ;) (Posen)

OMG Beca did you just came out to the world like this!?!? You’re such a rockstar! (Jesse)

YO GIRL, the concert was amazing, as usual 💥💥💥 (CR)

Someone is whippeddddd 😜😜😜😜 proud of you, babe 💋 (Stace)

Love wins!! 🌈🌈🌈🦄🦄🦄🌈🌈🌈 (Jessica?Ashley??)

Wow Beca, amazing concert! Didn’t expect that first part 😍 (Flo)

Love wins!! 🌈🌈🌈🦄🦄🦄🌈🌈🌈 (Ashley?Jessica??)

Hey I saw the live, it was great!! (Benji)

👏🏼👏🏼 💪 (Lilly)

She only quickly replied to Jesse and Stacey before calling Chloe immediately

Wow dude, I was actually gonna call you tomorrow about that… I mean, I didn’t want to erase our story or anything… that song was a bit extreme… (-> Jesse)

Shut up bitch! (-> Stace)

“Hey baby, you should be sleeping” “how am I supposed to sleep after that!?” asked Chloe, her voice was bubbly and Beca could hear how wide her smile was, it made her smile too. To make Chloe happy was what she was in this World for, she was sure about it “that was the most romantic thing anyone ever did for me! I don’t know what I did to deserve you, honestly” “must have been something bad…” joked the pop star “so you’re not mad, right?” she checked even though the answer was pretty obvious “mad? Beca, the only mad I am is mad for you" “cheesy” laughed Beca “said the girl who just dedicated a love song to me during her own concert” scoffed Chloe “look babe, I gotta go, Amy decided we have to go get drunk to celebrate… in the end the one pass was for her date, he’s not that weird this time by the way, and the third one was for a dude she paid to hold her phone the whole time so she could enjoy the concert, can you believe that?” asked Beca laughing again “…I mean yeah, that’s totes something she would do" replied Chloe giggling “go have fun baby, I love you" “love you too, goodnight”

All cool. I know what we had and I know she’s something else, she always has been. I’m happy for you (Jesse)

🤐 (Stace)

Thank you Jesse (-> Jesse)

After that night to her concerts started to appear pride flags and Beca had to admit it felt nice, but what really got to her was one girl in Spain that stopped her on the ‘Ramblas’ while she was visiting Barcelona “hi you’re Beca Mitchell, right? I don’t wanna bother you I just wanted to thank you for what you did in Manchester. I am a lesbian and to know that my favourite female singer has a girlfriend makes me so happy, you have no idea how much this means to me. You have given me the courage to come out to my best friend and to my brother” Her eyes were watery as she spoke and Beca just looked at her speechless “representation matters, and I wanted to thank you from the bottom of my heart” she concluded and Beca, for the first time in her life, felt the need to hug someone who wasn’t Chloe, maybe it was because the girl must have been thirteen years old or maybe because she was so considerated to respect her space and not asking for a hug or a photo, but she decided that it was almost certainly because of what she said, because she’d never thought about being a role model or someone that made others feel like they belong, that there is nothing wrong with them “uhm, you want a hug?” she asked screwing up her face cause she knew how awkward she sounded “oh ohmygod really?” answered the girl over the moon “c’m here" she said hugging her.

Beca couldn’t wait to be back home, before leaving she had given Chloe the keys of her apartment and she knew she would have founded her there waiting for her. What Beca didn’t know was that Chloe had organized a little ‘welcome back’ party with all the Bellas, only Amy, Flo and Stacey could make it but it was still something.

The pop star didn’t see that coming and she had to admit it was a nice surprise to have a small reunion with some of her best friends after being far from home for so long, but despite their presence in her apartment and the scare they gave her screaming “surprise” when she opened the door, the first thing she did was to go hug Chloe, who met her halfway. The two girls hugged for a long time whispering how much they missed each other and how happy they were to be in the same room again. After a while Beca pulled back to look at her girlfriend, still holding her waist while Chloe had her arms wrapped around the brunette’s neck. They were looking at each other with so much love and happiness in their eyes that the room was frozen, their friends were standing there looking at them with proud expressions, and then there was Amy who was taking pictures of them, the two girls didn’t notice any of it, they were too busy staring at each other’s lips licking or biting their owns, until Chloe made the smallest move towards Beca, knowing that the girl didn’t like pda she was being very careful to any sign that the brunette made to understand if she was okay with kissing in front of their friends, even if she really wanted to. While Chloe was worrying about that Beca crashed their lips together and the two girls shared a passionate kiss that ended only because the ‘woop’s and wolf whistles coming from Amy and Stacey were starting to piss Beca off.

Only when she was satisfied with how she greeted Chloe, Beca went to say hi to her other ‘guests’. They spent the evening drinking and chatting, but even if they were socializing with their friends Beca and Chloe were never far for too long, they would lean over the other to pour a drink or brushed their hands on the other’s back passing her while moving around the living room or less subtlety going to sit on each other laps every time one of them was chatting on the couch. At dinner time they decided to order Chinese food and eat it sitting in circle on the living room floor like they used to do in Barden (even if Beca’s dining table was more than big enough for all of them). This time Chloe was sitting between Beca’s opened legs and the brunette was leaning towards not to be cut out of the conversation. It wasn’t the best position to eat, but the two girls needed to be as close as possible. After she finished eating Beca wrapped her arms around Chloe and leaned her forehead on the taller girl’s shoulder yawning “girls, I think this is our clue” stated Flo starting to collect the food boxes off the pavement “oh no leave it, I can take care of that" said Chloe starting to move “nonsense” stopped her Stacey helping Flo “I’m not throwing you out guys, I’m just-“ another yawn cut her off “just very tired” she added rubbing her eyes “don’t worry shawshank” said Amy suspiciously gently “we know you can’t wait to have us out of the way” she added with a wink and a way exaggerated bite of her lip that made Chloe laugh “I think I’m gonna take her to bed tonight, but there will be no funny business involved this time" she said still laughing and Beca just hummed, too tired to form words.

As soon as the girls left, Beca and Chloe were laying in bed curled up together. “I’m sorry there’s no funny business… I really want it to be but I am literally dying” apologised Beca snuggling closer to the warm body beside her “hey, it’s totes fine. I’m happy to just be able to hold you right now, I don’t need anything more than this" assured her Chloe before kissing her forehead.

The next morning Beca woke up much earlier than Chloe, due to the jetlag and decided to wake her beautiful girlfriend up by going down on her. Chloe appreciated it so much that they stayed in bed until noon having the best sex Beca ever had. They were about to get up when both of their phones buzzed, it was the group chat. Amy had sent a bunch of photos of them hugging and kissing writing ‘BOOM’ under the last one

Oh come on Amyyyy! Now I have to worry about paparazzi even in my home? WTF ( -> Bellas💕)

Beca was nervous. They had just finished lunch and she decided it was a good time to ask Chloe to move in with her. She tried to dry her sweaty palms on her jeans before hugging her from behind while she was washing the dishes “stop this" she told her placing a soft kiss under her left ear “I’m gonna finish it later, you don’t have to do it all" she added letting the tip of her nose brush on the shell of that same ear “okay" shivered Chloe drying her hands before turning to hug her and kiss her slowly “so, I was thinking…” started Beca biting her lip nervously “I know this might sound crazy but… why don’t you move in with me? You’ve been basically living here already and I know you love this place! Maybe this is soon but… we didn’t really follow the rules since the beginning so… why start now?” “yes" “I mean we’ve lived together already and it only made me fall harder for you if anything, I know all your habits and I learned to live with them and you did the same with mine and-“ “Beca. I said yes” repeated Chloe with a wide smile “yes?” echoed Beca excited “yes” whispered again the redhead.

They were lying on the couch and Beca was staring at one of the pics Amy sent them, the one that captured the moment right before their kiss, it was the quintessence of happiness “can I post this on my Instagram?” she asked turning the screen to let Chloe see it “I would love that" answered the redhead with a wide smile “is this about what that girl told you in Spain?” “Mhm” nodded the brunette “and this would make those stupid paparazzi stories stop” she added and then stopped to think “but it would put YOU on their radar… are you sure? Do you really want to live in this fucking fishbowl with me?” “baby, I want to live with you I don’t care about the paparazzi” she assured her and Beca kissed her before posting the photo with the caption ‘finally back into her arms 😍’.

#Fun fact: False God is my least favourite song in Lover #bechloe #Bechloe + Taylor Swift #Bechloe one shot #Bechloe oneshot #pitch perfect au

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dancinginodessa · 4 years

Text

better late than never

I do a survey every year on New Year’s. It’s currently February 5. We’re going to make it “in the new year” this time so I don’t break my fifteen-year streak, okay?

1. What did you do in 2019 that you’d never done before?

Many things, some of them not suitable for a general audience. (I’ll tell you about Psych Bike when you’re older.) I went camping for the first time, which also means I set up a tent and slept outdoors for the first time. I had a surprise party for the first time, which is less something I did than something that was done for me. I was brave in new ways and drew new boundaries. I finished my first cross-stitching project. I broke my elbow. That last one actually sucked and I am not inclined to do it again.

2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

My sole resolution is always to read a certain number of books in the coming year. After an intervention from my therapist back in 2018, I’ve kept that number at 52, and this year I again succeeded with 63 total. I would like to think I enjoyed them more and chose them with greater discretion because I wasn’t racing towards an impossible goalpost.

I’m keeping my resolution. I’m also keeping the implicit sub-resolution, which is to continue finding ways to be kind to myself. We’ll see.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

I don’t think so, which probably means I’ve forgotten an ENTIRE BABY. Sorry, baby!

4. Did anyone close to you die?

My grandmother, in October. It was long and slow and agonizing and I miss her terribly.

5. What countries did you visit?

Does...does New Jersey count as a country?

6. What would you like to have in 2020 that you lacked in 2019?

A better singing voice, which means I am going to have to keep singing. But it wasn’t until 2019 that I was brave enough to do karaoke at all, so maybe this is possible!

Also, a short story published somewhere. Hell, scratch that - a short story, finished.

7. What date from 2019 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

October 6: my father’s stroke.

October 7: my grandmother’s death.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Surviving.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not telling people what I needed; relatedly, pretending to myself that I didn’t have needs at all. No one benefits from that. It’s just a good way to cultivate resentment.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

I broke my damn elbow while carrying La Croix and no one will ever let me live it down. Also got the sniffles a few times.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

Opera tickets to The Queen of Spades, maybe. The jigsaw puzzle I gave Griffin for the holidays, not least because he got me a jigsaw puzzle too and the moment we realized what we’d done was so, so delightful. Honorable mentions: bus tickets, medication, this one really great sweater.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

My mother. Me. Anyone on Twitter who made me laugh, especially Ashley Feinberg. The folks at One Story for being so kind when I left. My therapist.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

My mother. Me. The entire administration. The rest of Twitter.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Rent, food, and alcohol, perhaps not in that order. If my parents ask: in that order.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

The Fourth of July at the pirate ship; Psych Bike; karaoke night; any of a million things in this neighborhood, because this neighborhood now feels like home, and that’s the most exciting thing of all.

Also, Animal Crossing, though it got bumped until 2020 and I am only just hanging on.

16. What song will always remind you of 2019?

Among others, “The Bad Touch,” because it turns out I absolutely crush that one at karaoke night. Ditto “Truth Hurts.”

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder? Sadder, but how could I not be?

ii. thinner or fatter? Unclear (love 2 have dysmorphia), but I think I gained a few pounds.

iii. richer or poorer? Roughly the same, which is frankly an achievement.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Sleeping. Writing. Asking for what I needed. Crocheting and cross-stitching and watching dumb TV. Kissing. Setting firm boundaries with someone in my industry who was harassing me, though that situation is (mostly?) resolved. Being brave - but I was already pretty brave.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Waiting for bad things to happen. They happen whether or not you expect them.

20. How will you be spending Christmas?

My grandma is dead - did I mention? So Christmas was spent with my parents at our house, just the three of us. It was strange and sad but kind of wonderful, too. We are all figuring out how this family fits together now that there are fewer of us.

January 7: went to church, went to the Strand, went home and ate soup with Griffin because he was sick and I wanted to be with my buddy.

21. Did you fall in love in 2019?

Kept falling.

22. How many one-night stands?

Funny story! Funny story that I’m not going to put in writing.

23. What was your favourite TV program?

I didn’t watch much TV, but rewatching Parks and Rec has been great, even if some of it didn’t age super well. I’m also literally the last person on the internet to watch The Great British Baking Show and am 10000% on board.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

No. I’m too tired.

25. What was the best book you read?

I have a whole list, and I could not possibly tell you my favorite favorite. However, a few contenders would be Disappearing Earth by Julia Phillips, Maybe You Should Talk To Someone by Lori Gottlieb, Flights by Olga Tokarczuk, Trick Mirror by Jia Tolentino, In the Dream House by Carmen Maria Machado, etc. etc. etc...

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

I’m not sure I actually listened to much that would qualify as a discover and not an extension of my existing interests, but I did discover that music is beginning to bring me joy the way it did in college and which I had been sorely missing.

27. What did you want and get?

A diagnosis. It’s good to have the words for yourself.

28. What was your favourite film of this year?

Lord. What even came out in 2019? I only just saw Parasite last weekend, here in 2020, but it counts, and I’m choosing that. Midsommar ruled too.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 28 and went to a nice dinner with my boyfriend that turned out to be a surprise party with my friends. It was great and I cried.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

My grandmother.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2019?

Bisexuality™

32. What kept you sane?

Last year I said “In no particular order: therapy, my mom, crocheting, cross-stitching, the New York Times crossword, gummy worms, venting to Karen, coffee.”

And...that’s about right.

Shoutout to Xanax, though.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Ruby Tandoh, William Jackson Harper, Michael B. Jordan, Janelle Monae, the bear from MIdsommar (that last one is a joke)

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

Everything, but especially family separation.

35. Who did you miss?

My parents, especially after the stroke. My grandmother, always.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

The entire neighborhood crew. I am so lucky to have them.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2019:

You can make it through more than you imagined.

#the year in review

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lovingloudly-archived · 5 years

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if you had to recommend some songs by queen for someone who had never listened to them or only know like one song by them,, what songs would you recommend? -🌱⭐️

ehdjrfghkdgdkjh AAAAAH this is v relevant (well queen always is to me but shh) cause i watched the rest of the rock montreal concert last night and cried during SONGS I HAD NO REASON TO CRY AT they just make emotional waah :,)

first off!! a couple of things to note about queen: they literally have a song that will??? never be surpassed in how popular and iconic it is, srsly. NONE OF US have any recollection of learning the lyrics yet when it comes on everyone in the nearby vicinity is like OH FUCK YEAH!!!!. another thing, queen is the only band where each member has individually written a number one single and i think that is pretty iconic so i’m gonna list these songs by band member because honestly KNOWING SOMETHING LIKE…. OH I DONT KNOW… A NOW Astrophysicist writing a song called fat bottomed girls….. yeah! and last thing, u may or may not know so many more queen songs than u think :))

ANYWAY YEAH THERE MIGHT BE A LOT HERE, LISTED BY BAND MEMBER AND KINDA CHRONOLOGICALLY/BY ALBUM (also genuinely i havent even heard all of their songs SO THIS MAY BE INACCURATE IN THE FUTURE BABIE)

* means my personal faves :D

freddie (cat dad, loved his husband jim hutton :D read mercury & me, u fools!!, literally can’t look at him in the 70s vs 80s and believe they’re the same, actually was v shy irl and finding that out made me feel ok abt being shy myself 🥺):*my fairy king liar (JOHN DEACON HAS THE SICKEST BASS SOLO IN THIS OK.)seven seas of rhyefunny how love is (CRIED THE FIRST TIME I HEARD THIS TBH)killer queenin the lap of the gods (AAaaAAaaAAAAAAAAAAAAH)death on two legslazing on a sunday afternoon*seaside rendezvous (feels like a summer boardwalk or carnival. ur gonna love it)love of my life*somebody to love (honestly thinking too hard about how many looking for/wanting love songs freddie wrote makes me SO emotional bc he really wanted somebody to love and then a year after he wrote it’s a hard life about the same kinda topic he met jim and they were together until the end :,) and freddie said in an interview that he had “found that niche he was looking for his entire life” and OHH MY GOD THAT MAKES ME CRYY)good old-fashioned lover boy*we are the champions (i can’t listen to this too often but when i do DEFINITELY OPT FOR A LIVE VERSION LIKE LIVE AID BECAUSE IT. HITS. MY HEART)bicycle race (freddie rlly just wanted to write a song about bicycles. and also don’t listen to anyone who tries to say this is about bisexuality oh my GODDD)*don’t stop me now (the happiest song on earth, according to science, IT CHECKS OUT!!! I FEEL SO MUCH SEROTONIN BC OF THIS. EVEN WHEN IT PLAYED THAT ACAPELLA BEGINNING AT THE END OF BO RHAP OHHH MYGOD) *play the gamecrazy little thing called love (inspired by elvis, FREDDIE COULD PLAY LIKE 3 CHORDS ON GUITAR AND WE LOVE HIM FOR IT)staying power (watch me put all of hot space on here. ITS A FUNKY ALBUM!)body language (LISTEN. I KINDA LOVE IT)life is realcalling all girls*cool cat (FREDDIE SANG THE FULL THING IN FALSETTO. DO U SEE THIS)*soul brother (HE WROTE THIS ABOUT BRIAN/DEDICATED TO HIM U GUYSS :(((( AND THEY WERE SOUL BROTHERS!!!!! ohmyodtheywereosulbrothrsrs)*it’s a hard lifepain is so close to pleasure (also composed by deaky!)the miracle (it’s credited to all of them but it says the main composers were freddie and john!)*breakthru (THE JOY OF THIS SONG AND HOW MUCH FUN THEY WERE HAVING ON THE VIDEO :(((( IT GETS ME EMO)was it all worth itinnuendoi’m going slightly mad*the show must go on (makes me cry too much to listen to it unless its SAD FREDDIE HOURS but when you think about how close to the end this was yet how fukgignhn incredible his vocals still were it’s so heartbreaking and admirable like waah i just :( love freddie mercury sm)

brian may (TALL. big hair. what is his routine tbh???, ASTROPHYISICIST?? THEY’RE ALL SO SMART. LOVES ANIMALS AND IS TRYING TO END BADGER CULLING. i’d offer him my life):keep yourself alive*doing alright (this was written before queen was properly formed and the band was still roger, brian and tim staffel, who also helped write it, in smile!)the night comes down (you can tell ESPECIALLY well in this song that the only time slots they could get at the studio to record was super late at night ksjfdgjkfdg)father to son*now i’m here (SOUNDS SO GOOD LIVE BECAUSE ITS FASTER AND JUST MORE ENERGETIC AND WAAH OH MY GOD CAN’T RECOMMEND LISTENING TO LIVE VERSIONS OF NOW I’M HERE ENOUGH)*’39 (um. the only song to exist actually! queen’s designated yeehaw song. jsut listen to it played live at earls court babie!! the story of the song is here and TBH LIKE. BRIAN WENT OFF AND CONTINUED TO GO OFF WITH HIS SONGS)*good companytie your mother downwhite man*we will rock youall dead, all dead*sleeping on the sidewalk (MY FAVE BRIAN VOCALS TBH)*it’s late*fat bottomed girls (:^])dragon attack (GONNA YEET THAT SOUND EHYEYEYAAH)dancerput out the fire (PEOPLE GET SHOT BY PEOPLE. PEOPLE WITH GUUUNS)las palabras de amor (depacito song.)*hammer to fall (I PREFER THIS SONG LIVE BUT STUDIO VERSION IS STILL. SO GOOD. THESE LYRICS??? ‘HERE WE STAND, HERE WE FALL, HISTORY WONT CARE AT AALL’ UHHHH!!! HEHEHEHEY HAMMER TO FFaaAAALL?)*who wants to live forever (dont TALK TO Me about this SONG ill cry i literally never listen to it its been months it makes me SO sad and how the music swells and ohh my god I CANTT.)i want it allscandal*headlong (just how cute they all are in the music video ALONE…. hoop diddy diddy… hoop diddy doo :(( wow)roger taylor (for some reason the fandom thirsts over him. its kinda just creepy. i just thinks he’s cute in a rat way and i love him AND ROGERINA see: i want to break free :)) also he said trans rights and as the wise jim hutton said freddie and roger were ‘clearly soulmates’)i’m im love with my car (OH YOU THOUGHT BO RHAP WAS THE WEIRDEST SONG ON ANATO????)drowse*action this day (oh sidenote brian and roger hated hot space and NOBODY IN THE FANDOM NOR ROGER’S OWN CHILDREN AGREE WITH THEM. IT SLAPS HARDDDDD)*radio ga ga (nothing can communicate my joy whenever i hear this song but like with a lot of other songs NOTHING COMPARES TO THE LIVE VERSIONS OF IT AND SEEING ALL THE PEOPLE DO THE HAND CLAPS LIKE :((( their power..)*one vision (yeah its by roger but ever wondered why the last lyric is fried chicken? jim hutton saying to freddie after the band were messing around adlibbing ‘u should leave that in’ AND THEN THEY DID. THANK YOU JIMOTHY HUTHICN)a kind of magic*these are the days of our lives (:()

ALSO AGAIN I HAVENT LISTENED TO ALL OF THEIR SONGS, SO THERE’S A LOT I’M LEAVING OUT DFJHKGFFKGLJ

john deacon (born august 19th 1951 :) and he rlly wants u to know it. his dream when asked was “wet.”, he likes cheese on toast, HAS A LOT OF KIDS, wrote some of the most iconic basslines in the world and is just overall incredibly bouncy and groovy. whether u call him deacy or deaky is up to u and then ur fate will decided by the disco gods)misfire (the general fandom agrees this is abt premature ejaculation. the song’s only 1:50 long AND IT’S MORE OF A FANDOM INSIDE JOKE THAN ANYTHING BUT REALLY.. LISTEN TO THAT SONG AND TRY TO THINK IT HAS MEANING THAT Isn’t That. again, JOHN HAS LIKE 6 KIDS)you’re my best friend (john was only like early 20s when we wrote this but it’s about his wife and :((((( wtf true love)*another one bites the dust (REALLY JUST LIKE. MADE THE BASSLINE FOR ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC SONGS IN THE WORLD. AND HE DID IT MULTIPLE TIMES???)*back chat (another similarly inside joke kinda thing in the album, THE GENERAL CONSENSOUS IS THAT THIS IS ABOUT BRIAN AHAHSHDSFHKJDF BECAUSE THE HOT SPACE ERA WHAT KINDA TENSE SINCE THEY DIDNT AGREE ON THE ALBUM BUT WE’LL NEVER KNOWWW)under pressure (ANOTHER BASSLINE FROM THE MAN THE MYTH THE DISCO LEGEND HIMSELF)*i want to break free (OH AND HE DID THIS SONG AS WELL UHH. EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU JOHN DEACON????)*friends will be friends (makes me so emotional :((( queen were a familyyyy :()

and bonus stuff:

LISTEN TO FREDDIE’S SOLO ALBUM ‘MR. BAD GUY’ I AM BEGGING U,,,, U WON’T REGRET IT IT’S SO ??? JUST LIKE SO FULL OF FUCIGNGN,.. LOVE SONGS AND IT’S S DANCABLE AND ALSO MADE ME CRY AND GOD. it was literally just remastered and rereleased THIS MOnth this is such a good time to listen to it,, pls… their solo stuff is so goodas for live performances definitely recommend live at the rainbow, rock montreal, live aid, hungarian rhapsody & wembley ‘86 HELL I HAVEN’T WATCHED MOST OF THESE MYSELF I’M TOO EMOTIONALLY SENSITIVE WHEN IT COMES TO QUEEN….. BUT I HOPE U LIKED THIS LONGWINDED POST :)

#anon #answered

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saras-almanac · 5 years

Text

So literally no one asked for this, but it’d typed so much of it out in answer to that ask I just answered and I felt if I don’t get it out that I will burst. So below the cut is a bunch of thoughts on vic’s storyline and ryan potentially leaving.

Okay, so first of all, it’s been really hard for me to care about Emmerdale right now. I know that I started this show for Robron a few years ago, but I’ve grown to really love that entire fucking village. But lately it’s just been a little... less-than-stellar. And I think it’s a problem with the new producers introducing so many new characters (or returning) that are giving the front-and-center treatment without giving the regulars anything really substantial. As horrifying as the Jacob and Maya storyline was, that was really the one thing that I think they’ve done really well, up until a few weeks ago where it’s become a fucking mess but like not in a fun way.

These new producers don’t have a very good understanding of pacing, which makes it hard to follow. Things that should come to a head and force a conversation at least, if not action are dragged on for way too long by just talking round in circles, until it’s over in one episode and then we move on and act like it never happened. You can have long, drawn out storylines, but you can’t do that by just having 2-3 characters having the exact same conversation every few days (like it feels Robert and Vic are doing right now).

And that sort of brings me to my issues with Vic’s storyline. Now, I don’t want to say how anyone in Vic’s situation should feel because everyone’s different, but it’s absolutely ridiculous to me that she’s not seeking counselling or something as she’s making this decision about the pregnancy. It feels really stilted and forced that she’s demanding everyone treat her pregnancy like a miracle and happy event, without acknowledging or allowing other people to acknowledge that it’s not an entirely happy thing. It’s okay to feel conflicted but the show is going out of it’s way to paint anyone (Robert) who is trying to just get Vic to acknowledge some of this stuff because pushing it aside is only going to make it worse in the long run, as evil. Now Robert has been insensitive throughout this thing; he’s quick to put his foot in it and he wouldn’t be Robert if he wasn’t, but there are times when he’s making actually valid points and not just Vic, but the entire show is painting him badly because of it all. It’s okay to make Robert the bad guy in this for daring to suggest a termination over a clearly traumatic incident for Vic, but then you can’t also make him the villain for talking about it like a traumatic event.

Overall, I just find a bit offensive (and perhaps because of all the things going on in the USA where I live regarding access to abortion and restrictions), and hard to swallow that this is the way they’re doing this story. They still could have Vic keep the baby and stuff, but could we see her decisions a bit more clearly? Could we see her talking it through? Can we see her weighing it, maybe going back and forth? Or at least have seen just one conversation where she decided, because it happened mostly off screen (when her and Robert were gone) and then she came back and was like, Yup I’m keeping the baby 100% without any conversation about what it means and she shuts down any attempt at a conversation. And since the way the show is going that Lee probably won’t get sentenced, there’s a very real possibility that he could end up getting some sort of parental rights so at least we could have a conversation about that. But nope. It’s just all decisions we don’t really get to see a conversation about so it just looks like Vic is literally putting her head in the sand and refusing to acknowledge some of the reality around her.

That might sound offensive, but like this whole storyline feels dragged out, rushed, and lazily construed for a topic as important and impactful as rape.

Now the Ryan leave speculation... I’ll be honest and say that I’ll be incredibly sad and disappointed when he leaves--whether that’s later this year or some other time. I get it, but I’ll still be sad because Robert is quite literally my favorite character and I don’t want to see him go.

The other thing is that I don’t want to see him go because I do not trust these new producers at all to give him a proper, believable send off. Unfortunately for the show, they have built up Robert and Aaron as literal soulmates who have gone through hell both with and for each other, so they can’t just break them up again. So their only options are Robert getting arrested or Robert dying--neither of those are great options.

Obviously Robert dying would give Aaron some massive angst for the next year or so, but the implication of watching the only gay man miserable is just... not a good look. Neither is killing the only bisexual man on the show. (Not in the year 20-biteen. I refuse to allow another bisexual death in media this year. Not happening). But aside from that, it just feels like a waste to kill him when, it seems like Aaron probably won’t be happy with anyone else. So we’ll have to watch him be miserable or try to find a fraction of happiness with someone while we’ll all know that he won’t be. And yeah, maybe it’ll play out differently because Robert will actually not be an option, but still.

And I can’t help but feel... annoyed at any future love interest because they’ll be introduced only as his love interest which is always boring and short hand for not actually giving a lot of detail or backstory on this character. But that’s neither here nor there.

And if he gets arrested, why now? Robert’s defining characteristic is that he is slippery and always finds his way out of trouble. He literally killed a person and still talked his way out of it. And yeah, maybe he’ll have a slip up, but it just doesn’t make sense. And violence really isn’t in Robert’s nature like this. He can be for sure, but he’d more likely pay someone else to get their hands dirty than do it himself because that’s how he is (And I will go to my grave knowing that’s what happened with Billy situation because there is just no fucking way Robert beat him up).

The only way I can see him actually going to prison is if he confesses on behalf of someone else. Like either Aaron or Vic do something to Lee and the police come sniffing around and Robert takes the blame--Vic’s been through enough and is pregnant and Aaron literally has said he wouldn’t make it through prison again--and he gets sent down for it. But that would make people wonder why they’re trying to get Aaron to move on since his husband was just in prison for a little bit. Unless Lee’s actually killed, which I’m not sure the show would actually commit to.

The other option is that Robert goes on the run--but then we’d ask why Aaron wasn’t going with him. They’ve made it clear that Aaron is literally ride or die for Robert so why wouldn’t he go with him? Yes, he’s got Liv, but I think it’s going to be really hard to push across that they’ll willingly separate from each other.

In any scenario or case, I just don’t don’t have faith that these showrunners will be able to pull it off in any semblance of a satisfactory way. I honestly would rather them just never acknowledge Robert leaving and do the sitcom trope of, “Oh you just missed him” “He was just here” any time someone’s looking for Robert. But they won’t do that cause I think I’d be the only one who’d enjoy that.

#here's way too many words on a topic no one asked me about #read at your own risk #robert sugden #robron #vic's sl #emmerdale #emmerdale chatter #ed spoilers #tw rape mention

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funkymysteriies · 5 years

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adria arjona, 32, cis female, she/her. 🗽 looks like that’s BEATRIZ GARCÍA reporting for duty. they’re originally from SAN JUAN , PUERTO RICO , so i wonder if working as a DETECTIVE for THE SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT ever gets old. anyway , i heard that they’re EMPATHETIC but also kind of INDECISIVE , which is why i guess they always remind me of THE SMELL OF COFFEE IN THE MORNING , RAMEN NOODLE CUPS , OVERSIZED SWEATSHIRTS.

hello !! it’s your friendly neighborhood dumbass , lara / admin l !! i’m so excited to plot and write with you ALL so i’ll try to keep this short , but informative. like this post or send me a message if and we’ll get to plotting !!

→ 𝕙𝕚𝕤𝕥𝕠𝕣𝕪.

( tw: very brief & vague mention of attempted sexual assault )

beatriz was born in san juan , puerto rico , the youngest of two siblings. her older brother is riker’s c.o. eddie garcía ( l&o: svu , s15e06 — yes i rewatched the episode today and decided to make some changes based on the fact that eddie and bea have the same last name and are both puerto rican ) , but they weren’t raised together.

the reason for that being that bea was not planned , about 15 years younger than eddie , and their mother , carmen garcía , didn’t have the money to raise two kids.

bea’s father , guillermo sandoval ( not eddie’s father ) , was an old flame of carmen’s she reunited with during a holiday visit to puerto rico. when he learned of her pregnancy , he jumped at the opportunity to raise their child. he loved the idea of having a baby girl ( despite not being exactly ready for one , but more on that later ). so carmen went back to puerto rico , gave birth , and once she recovered enough to travel , went back to new york.

bea stayed with guillermo , who quicklly realized he wasn’t really fit to raise his daughter , so she was passed on to her grandmother , carmen’s mother.

guille didn’t exactly ghost , though. he was around , but he wasn’t so much a father as he was someone who would pick her up once every couple of weeks to take her to the park or get ice cream.

when bea was around ten , her grandmother passed away. bea had two options: she could stay in puerto rico and live with her dad , or she could make the move to the bronx , now that her older brother was out of the house , had his own job , and helping their mom.

her parents let her choose , so she went with the latter.

she didn’t really know her mother and brother , so it took some time getting used to , but it was clear they all loved each other very much.

she and eddie don’t care about the fact that they don’t share a father ; that’s irrelevant to them. they’re siblings , simple as that , and they both use their mother’s last name.

eddie was very protective of his little sister , so bea grew up a bit on the sheltered side. this definitely made her a little naive , but that’s something that changed with time.

she had a lot of interests growing up , none of which really stuck. she would pick up hobbies , only to get bored shortly after. the only one she really maintained ( enough to consider making a career out of it ) was ballet.

all through middle school and high school , beatriz spent all her free time in the dance studio. the garcías didn’t have a lot of money , so bea helped around the studio in exchange for classes. she tutored kids at her school so she could pay for slippers , leotards , tights.

truth be told , she was never more than an okay dancer. she was good , just not great. not outstanding. kind of average. still , she loved it.

and then one day , she didn’t. just like every other hobby and obsession picked up in the past , eventually she lost interest.

she knew she wasn’t talented enough to “ make it ” as a ballerina , so why bother ? she stopped going to classes , donated her pointe shoes , and focused instead on graduating and going to college.

she was smart , always had been. she’d always been bookish ; whenever she wasn’t at the dance studio ( before giving up ballet , that is ) , she was at the library.

when college acceptance letters started rolling around , bea earned herself a full scholarship to hudson university.

she started out as an english major , but of course. she struggled to find something that truly called to her. she then changed her major to journalism. when she wasn’t so sure about that , she audited a few business courses. then she switched over to psychology.

like many of her classmates , she developed a little crush on one of her professors. he was young , he was hip , he rolled his eyes when he talked about freud. it was a completely harmless crush.

and then he asked her out on a date. he didn’t phrase it like that , but they both knew. and while she knew she should’ve said no , bea accepted. but then things took a turn she didn’t agree with , he got a little handsier than she was comfortable with , and before things got out of hand , she got herself out of there.

refusing to see herself as a victim , she didn’t do anything about it. didn’t report it , didn’t press charges , didn’t even tell anyone about what happened ( ‘ nothing even happened ’ , she would rationalize over and over again ).

needless to say , she dropped that course and changed her major once more. this was the last time.

criminal justice was a last-ditch effort to actually earn a degree. surprisingly , it worked out. she wasn’t sure it was her calling at first , but as she got herself through the police academy and her first few years as a cop , she started to feel like maybe this was what she was always meant to do.

once she made detective , she requested to be placed in the special victims unit right away. there wasn’t much thought put into the decision , it was more of a gut feeling. over time , she’s been learning to trust those more and more.

she’s been at svu for about three years now , learning that sometimes a “ calling ” isn’t so much a call , but more like a letter that gets lost in the mail and finally reaches you a few years later.

→ 𝕡𝕖𝕣𝕤𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕝𝕚𝕥𝕪.

some more facts about bea !!

she’s a libra !

she loves dogs , and would like every single dog in the world to know that she would absolutely die for them.

she has a bulldog named bustelo , he’s a rescue.

she can’t live without coffee , but she’ll avoid instant coffee whenever she can. she prefers to make it herself , so she usually brings a thermos into work.

she can make some fantastic coffee , but can’t cook to save her life. lives on takeout and ramen noodles.

loves big , oversized sweatshirts. as soon as she gets home from a long day at work, the first thing she does is strip down and slip into a nice , comfy , familiar sweatshirt.

she's not very good at following advice. but she’s also a libra , so she’s the kind of person who’ll ask for your opinion on something , pretend to actually consider it , go ahead with whatever she was thinking of doing in the first place , and then pretend to be shocked when her actions have consequences.

she can definitely be a little pretentious. definitely romanticizes things a lot.

kind of a hopeless romantic with commitment issues.

despite how dark and grim reality of her work , she’s a generally hopeful person. she still has faith in humanity.

big bisexual disaster.

here’s her pinterest board !!

→ 𝕔𝕠𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕤.

let me preface this by saying i am open to absolutely anything. so what i’m listing here aren’t really wanted connections i’d like to fill , but just ideas to get the ball rolling ? and then we can do whatever we want with that. go wild.

friends !

childhood friends ! other kids who grew up in the bronx !

police academy buddies !

coworkers ! obviously , there’s already a few of these , but i’d love to talk dynamics ! maybe they get along great , maybe not so great , maybe they’re always butting heads , have different approaches when it comes to investigating , the possibilities are endless !

flings ! hookups ! one-night stands ! exes ! anything !

come at me !!

#dd.intro #( bea g. ) / * isms .#this took way longer than i anticipated Wow i am Sorry folks

6 notes · View notes

lightsandlostbells · 5 years

Text

Skam France season 3, episode 3 reaction

Alexia was the MVP of the episode. Daphne needs a restraining order.

Episode 3

Clip 1 - Three men and an obnoxious whiny baby they inexplicably let hang around with them

Lucas at his locker Monday morning. The locker next to him is #24, the words Amor Amor and #instalove are written on it. #24 is also the slot for the choco bars that Eliott got for them in episode 1. Is that going to be Lucas and Eliott’s version of 21? What’s the significance of 24 - maybe 24 hours in a day, a day meaning a full period of both light and darkness? If we want to get Biblical, Luke 24 is the last chapter in the gospel of Luke and describes Jesus’ resurrection and ascension, although I don’t know if they’re going to go heavily into the Biblical/rebirth metaphors in Skam France (they’re going with light and dark). Anyway, any significance will become more obvious later in the season.

The boy squad shows up. Basile starts talking and when I first watched this without subtitles, my notes were “I don’t know what he’s saying but he needs to shut up.”

Watching with subtitles? I was right, Basile can fucking chill. He blows up at Lucas because he missed the party and he could’ve gotten laid. Even Arthur and Yann, who weren’t overly warm with Lucas when they entered, are telling Basile to calm down. Arthur tells Basile it wasn’t the party of the year. Yann, upon hearing the excuse that something’s up with Lucas’ mom, says who cares, the party’s in the past, diffusing the situation. Basile shuts up seemingly because the other two are chill.

I get that people aren’t perfect and that Lucas did something snaky on them, but Basile is so fucking creepy, Jesus. He’s not just peeved, he’s like ... seriously angry that he missed a chance to get laid, and he keeps up his tantrum after Lucas starts mentioning a problem at home, with his mom. Glad to know his priorities are fully aligned with his dick? It gives me the nastiest, skeeviest vibes, like this dude is going to end up frequenting incel forums in a year or two (if not sooner) and after his friends finally get sick of his shit and ditch him he’ll be railing against Lucas and Yann and calling them Chads or whatever.

The one good thing about Basile being terrible is that I think it made Yann and Arthur chill out, like they must have thought, “Holy shit, I need to not be like this guy.” Lucas explaining about his mom seemed to dial down their annoyance because they’re, you know, normal human beings with empathy that extends outside of their penile excursions. When Lucas hands back the weed to Arthur and offers to pay for it later, Arthur says not to worry about it. Man, this season is a lot better than the first two but I kind of hate Skam France for deciding that Basile was going to be the boy squad breakout and not Arthur.

Yann checks in with Lucas after the others leave and asks whether his mom is at the clinic, so I’m assuming that’s something that has happened in the past. I don’t remember hearing about Isak’s mom being in a clinic or psychiatric hospital. I mean, it actually might be a good thing, in that Lucas’ mom is willing and able to seek treatment - or it might be something else that’s concerning, like she’s a danger to herself or unable to take care of herself. I’m sure we’ll learn more about her condition later. Lucas tells Yann he doesn’t want to talk about it and Yann is a total pal and says the important thing is to be there for her. God, can we please get more Yann content? I know it’s coming later, I know Lucas has to go through some serious heartache and isolation first, but I need Yann’s presence like I need a cool drink of water.

Yann must have triggered Lucas’ guilt over not being there for his mom, because Lucas writes a text to her, saying he’s sorry for not answering her previous texts and that he’s been busy, but he’s thinking of her. Nice little moment of cause-and-effect, though I wonder how Lucas’ relationship is going to be with her later on and how he’ll describe it to Eliott. Because he doesn’t seem to be as totally alienated from her as Isak, though it’s still a rocky and distant relationship.

Clip 2 - Alexia loves unicorns

I see the Raptors’ logo on the wall so you know, nice that they still exist.

Lucas sees Chloé and Maria coming and runs away into the common room, lmao. Daphne, Alexia, and Emma are in there, and I have no idea why Daphne hides the broom behind her, like … you’re just sweeping the floor, girl, you ain’t pulling off a jewel heist. Although Lucas does suggest they’re burgling the room, heh. (I love Daphne’s rubber gloves, btw. She is taking this cleanup seriously.)

Lucas lies that he’s here to help them and Daphne is still weird about it, because it’s a secret and she doesn’t even want the girls to mention they’re moving the furniture. Emma “vaguely” says it’s so people can dance here. Lmao, that wasn’t really necessary, Emma, you could just have said they’re moving stuff out of the way to see how the room looks for their redesign or whatever. Lucas figures out that they’re throwing a party here, because he sat in on that last meeting and he’s not an idiot. Daphne complains that she doesn’t want anyone to know but she just blathers more about organizing an event. Errr, are you allowed to just throw a party at the school? Like … at night, on a Friday, with a bunch of teenagers, and no teacher supervision? I assume not. That seems like a huuuuuge fucking recipe for people to get drunk, make a mess, break shit, or in some way trash this room and possibly other parts of the school, and then you’ll never get your common room redone.

Lmao, at Alexia saying it’s OK because it’s Lucas and he’s not a snitch, and he and Emma just share a look like “Oh really?” Heh, that was a good (and subtle) inclusion. Well, it’s true that he is a snitch, it’s just that he’s also a self-serving snitch, and it’s not in his own best interests to rat out this party vs. ratting out Emma’s kissing Raptor Alex.

Alexia points out that Lucas is part of the crew now because he’s always gatecrashing, and Emma says he’s the new Manon, Alexis like, yeah, he even took her spot in the flat! They’re not wrong? He even took over from her as POV character! He just needs some bright red lipstick to complete the Manon transformation.

Daphne is like NO BOYS ALLOWED and I don’t blame her, she’s seen what kind of riffraff Lucas hangs with (starts with a B, ends with a go-fuck-yourself.)

Alex says Romain (her boyfriend who’s French Kasper) would love this ugly-ass table they’re moving and Emma points out she also has weird taste, indicating Alex’s unicorn shoes with little manes and horns. Yo, I don’t have an obsession with unicorns myself, but I applaud her wearing those shoes. Girl, wear whatever your technicolor heart desires.

Daphne is like, are those unicorns because you’re bi orrr … Alex says no, it’s because unicorns are awesome. OK, so she and Eliott are both into animals and attracted to more than one gender, that seems like a solid basis for a friendship. Let the Raccoonicorn brotp rise.

Daphne asks whether Romain knows she is bi, and Alex says no, but sexuality is fluid, anyway. Tbh I do find it strange that Romain does not know, not because she’s obligated to tell him or anything, just because in a long-term relationship (which it is, they hooked up like last June) I’d think you would share details like that? I mean, hasn’t she ever talked about her female exes or crushes or anything with him? Especially because she seems to be quite out and proud, she was openly talking about making out with Clara in S1, she has rainbow patches on her clothes. She also makes bisexuality-related posts on Instagram, like this one. I guess we don’t know much about her relationship with Romain and how serious it is, but is he like ... not paying attention at all, lmao?

Alex mentions the Kinsey scale and Lucas asks what that is, because this conversation about sexuality just so happens to be relevant to his interests. She explains what it is and mentions that many people have done stuff with the same sex. Just look at Emma and Daphne hooking up!

I did laugh that they mentioned that again, although Daphne is like NO NO NO that was one time and Emma initiated it!! Daphne, don’t dash my dreams. Especially now that she’s got creepy Basile after her; Daphne should find a nice girl to love and SHUT THAT SHIT DOWN in every way possible.

Emma describes herself as very fluid when drunk and ahhHHHHHH I groaned, like this is not a judgment call on Emma or anyone who behaves similarly because hey, make out with who you want, but this is not the greatest thing to reinforce, the whole “drunk girls making out” cliche is used to minimize the concept of bisexuality for woman (because that’s what you mean when you say you’re bi, right, you like to get drunk and kiss girls?). I mean, that’s where the complaint about the Eva/Vilde moment in Skam came from. It’s certainly different here because Alexia is actually bisexual in canon as opposed to no canon wlw rep in Skam, but I kinda wish they hadn’t thrown in this line in a scene that’s otherwise positive and educational about bisexuality.

Lucas is like, but it’s cool to be bi, right? Because Alex can kiss as many girls as she wants and date a boy, and everyone thinks she’s straight. Ohhhhh noooooo son. But at least that’s definitely in-universe ignorance that’s immediately refuted by Alex pointing out it doesn’t work like that. Do you choose who you fall in love with? Lucas considers that.

This is a big new scene so let’s go over it.

First of all, massive props to Skam France for having Alex confirm in words on screen that she is bisexual, and for course-correcting from previous seasons. Because personally I had a problem with Alex bi by Word of God but that factor not affecting like … her dialogue or interactions at all even when it would be relevant. For instance, the whole thing about Daphne thinking Manon is a lesbian played out the same way as Vilde thinking Noora is a lesbian, even when there was an out bisexual girl in the same scene, so Alex might not react the same way as girl Chris, or it might influence how Manon or Daphne reacted. Didn’t the girl squad laugh when Daphne brought this up and Daphne was all “your laughter makes this an unsafe environment to come out,” like that’s the kind of situation that should take into account one of the girls is bi, and yet there was nothing different? I think they took some of the viewer feedback in mind and saw that people wanted confirmation of Alex’s sexuality on screen, and that it was important to the fans, so good for them. They also had her say the word “bisexual” and treat it as a legit concept, which is still rare in media, as many canons just dance around it (to the point where I was surprised when Skam’s boy squad discussed bisexuality/pansexuality as a real thing).

Also, excellent to have Alex correct Lucas’ perception of her bisexuality, where basically she can mess around with girls but have a more serious thing with a guy, and no one has to know she’s anything but straight. Very common misconception of bisexuality, unfortunately a very dismissive perspective, and Alexia got to educate the audience. It was a really good thing for the viewers to hear, so again, big props.

I think Lucas made that comment about Alex kissing girls but dating a boy and getting to appear straight primarily because that situation seemed ideal to him. In his mind, Alex probably seems lucky because she can act on her non-heterosexual desires but not deal with the prejudice and judgment that comes with dating your own gender. Perhaps he’s thinking he can apply it to himself, like in a way he’s hoping he can maybe mess around with Eliott in secret but date a girl in public and not deal with any of the societal stigma that comes with gay relationships. I think it’s also possible he’s wondering if that’s how Eliott’s sexuality operates, like hey, maybe Eliott’s bi and he’ll date that girl, but kiss me. When really it’s not that simple.

Additionally, thinking of bisexuality in that distorted, superficial way means Lucas might not have to confront his own sexuality to a degree that makes him uncomfortable. If bisexuality is simple as kissing girls but dating boys - or in Lucas’ case, kissing boys but dating girls - then he can maybe leave it like that, he doesn’t really have to think about it further, what it means to fall in love with a boy. Almost like it would be an easy gratification of needs like eating or sleeping, rather than anything deeper that would shake up his world. Alexia points out it’s not like that. Why would she date some guy if the person she loves is a girl? You don’t choose who affects you emotionally.

Honestly the lead-in to this conversation was pretty clunky, like they obviously wanted to bring up bisexuality (which is great!) but they could’ve done it in a more organic way, much as I appreciated a glimpse of Alex’s unicorn shoes. Like IDK, when they’re talking about keeping the party a secret, Alexia could’ve added, “Well I admit, I told Clara about the party, too” and have Daphne go “You talk to your ex-girlfriend? Doesn’t Romain get jealous?” and Alexia be like “... why would he be?” You know, throw in another little moment where Alex disputes the “bisexual cheater” stereotype or something like that. Not sure if that example’s any better, just that I felt the way Daphne brought up the topic sounded a little As You Know.

I feel like while this conversation might have done a lot of good for the audience, the talk about the Kinsey Scale might have done more harm for Lucas than good, which is certainly not Alex’s fault, and also not a flaw of the narrative, just an observation. Because while I think it’s good to hear that someone doesn’t have to feel boxed in by definitions of sexuality, I don’t think Lucas is sexually fluid for any reason other than societal pressure to like girls. He makes out with them but it doesn’t appear to be something he enjoys, rather it’s something he makes himself do (which is how it was for Isak, if they’re following Isak’s example). It’s way different than if he had some attraction to girls but was struggling with his attraction to guys on top of that. And trying to test out his level of gayness or whatever, when his actions say one thing and his desires say something totally different, is probably going to make it more complicated for him than it needs to be.

Although one thing I want to mention is that Alex does know what Lucas had on his phone at the end of S1. We were shown in S2 that Manon and Emma must have shared it with her and possibly the other girls. So I don’t know if she cares about his sexuality to the extent that say, Manon does, but she is aware that he might be into guys. It’d be nice if she said her piece with that in mind.

Regarding Lucas’ relationship with the girl squad - it’s really sweet and of course nice to see him bonding with them, I just wonder if it isn’t cutting into the sense of isolation and detachment that he’s supposed to be feeling at this point in time. I’ve enjoyed seeing him smile and laugh with the girls as much as anyone, but they did make a point of detachment as a main struggle for his character. I mean, the opening clip of the season was literally called “Disconnected” and showed him distant from everyone. Sorry, Lucas, not that I like to see you have a hard time, but for that reason I kinda don’t want you to be buddy-buddy with the girl squad too quickly and easily. He doesn’t have to be downright frosty but I’d rather see this friendliness as more gradual, otherwise it cuts a little into the overall atmosphere.

I think these girl squad interactions are best used as a counter to the stress with the boy squad, and the differences in social pressure he gets from the squads, and also for some of the educational moments that he could get from Alex as a member of the LGBT community.

Clip 3 - Gay test

Lucas is at home at night, staring up at the ceiling while he’s on his laptop. Considering or psyching himself up for what he’s going to do. He googles gay test. The link he clicks on isn’t so much about personality/stereotypes, as with Isak but actual sexual actions, fantasies, and attraction, in the past, currently, and ideally.

He checks all the “other sex only” options, and like … a) he is lying about some of that since we know he obviously had a crush on Yann and is attracted to Eliott, we know he’s not exclusively daydreaming or hoping for the opposite sex - not to mention he doesn’t seem to really want girls at all b) this quiz is kinda fucked up because past actions don’t actually determine one’s sexuality, like if you’re hooking up with girls because of heteronormative pressure rather than genuine attraction, that’s not an indication you’re bi, that’s an indication you live in a homophobic society. Which everyone does.

I don’t get how he actually got a “bisexual” result, though? It looks like he checked the straightest answers possible, everything was about the opposite sex, so how would you get anything other than the most heterosexual possible score (in this case 7)? Did I miss something in translation?

I do feel bad for him because he was probably looking for some verification that he wasn’t gay, and the quiz told him he wasn’t entirely straight. He searches for “how to make it so no one knows you’re gay.” OUCH. So he knows, just like Isak did, that these results don’t mean a damn thing about whether he’s gay.

Tangent but like when Skam Italia S2 aired, I saw a fair number of comments comparing Isak to his remake counterparts, claiming that Isak was in super denial that he was gay or flat-out wasn’t sure at this point, whereas Lucas knows but doesn’t want to say it (or Martino knew he was gay but was struggling with external homophobia so he couldn’t come out) and not to be insufferable but: Isak knew he was gay. He wasn’t in denial of that any more than Lucas was here, tbh. What he was struggling with was the label “gay” and all the stereotypes and generalizations associated with it, and how that reflected on himself, as well as the social perception of being gay and how people would see him. What happened with Emma was a result of him trying to avoid those associations. But he asks Google how to get turned on by girls if you’re gay, he knows what he is even if he’s not comfortable with all that label entails to him.

He finds a forum where someone details their strategy. This sparked some theorizing because the person posting is “Tuturo” and Arthur’s IG handle is “monvoisintuturo” (which is a My Neighbor Totoro reference - I love that because Isak had a subtle reference to that film in the first season of Skam, with a poster on his wall). Coincidence? Is this a real post on a forum that they found or something they made up for the show? It’s dated 22/08/2017. Of course, they could have found that post, and invented Arthur’s IG around it...

Arthur being gay (or not straight, at least) would be one hell of a twist. Honestly, I doubt that’s what they’re headed toward, because the advice in the post doesn’t really align with what we’ve seen of Arthur’s personality so far. Sure, he’s not necessarily the most enlightened dude in every way, but we don’t see him lashing out with homophobic slurs and shit-talking gay people, we don’t see him with a hot girlfriend for cover. So he’s not taking his own advice. It would have been better foreshadowing if they’d set him up more along those lines, so we can see the hints other than his username. Then again, the post is from 2017 so I guess he could have grown away from that mindset or grown uncomfortable with it... But yeah, although I find the idea really intriguing, I’m not sold on it actually happening unless there are some bigger hints.

The advice is stuff like talk about girls all the time, get a hot yet prudish girlfriend, use gay slurs and show how angry gay people make you. We get Lucas’ voiceover as he reads the post and tbh I wish they’d not done that, like it worked fine when Isak was sitting there and they just showed the message for the viewers, like I get that it’s a longer message and they want to make it obvious, but they don’t have to spoon feed it to us. I guess it helps to hear it in Lucas’ voice so we can sense him internalizing it, but it’s still unnecessary. Maybe they could have just shown closeups of the most important phrases.

Clip 4 - Daphne rules the world

It’s the dance chicks clip. Alexia is a dancer! We saw her doing some gymnastics in previous seasons so that’s a nice touch.

I’m realizing that this clip is one of those things in the remakes where the production team needs to be careful, because the clip is about male gaze, but there’s also a line where the depiction of male gaze turns into an endorsement of it, if that makes sense. Like I want it to be clear that the boy squad is panting over and objectifying the girls, but you don’t want the show itself to objectify them. This clip stopped before it got too sleazy for me, so that was appreciated.

Instead of being disinterested like Isak was, Lucas is joining his bros as they drool over the girls. They’re watching through a window by the way, which is creepier than the boys being in the same room and the girls knowing of their presence - it’s a milder version of peeking into the girls’ locker room like it’s an ‘80s teen sex comedy or something.

Arthur resting his chin on Lucas’ shoulder is cute, though.

Lucas is saying some bullshit about how not all the girls are hot, which is kinda funny because lol none of the girls are hot to him, and how he wouldn’t let that girl suck him off, which is also kinda funny because we know you don’t want that, dude, but he’s also trying to be a fuckboy which is not funny.

It’s objectifying as fuck and not funny when you consider his internalized homophobia but I couldn’t help but laugh when he’s like “That girl is hot because she has big boobs” because it sounds like a robot trying to emulate human sexual attraction. Breasts, those certainly are things heterosexual men appreciate!

The other guys are like wow, even Basile isn’t as awful as you. I beg to differ. (Apparently Basile says something that’s relevant to #MeToo, like he wants to get laid but he’s also #MeToo, and get the fuck out of here with that shit, dude. Nothing about your dancing later in the episode says you’re against sexual harassment.) Lucas responds by calling them a gay slur. Lovely! The dudes are like, what’s up with that? Arthur calls it a “closeted homosexual comeback” which is a pet peeve of mine, the belief that homophobes are just closeted gay people, since it removes culpability from straight people (and you know, is not accurate). But he’s a teenage dude and well, Lucas is a closeted gay guy so I’m not gonna get mad about it. Though damn, if Arthur were gay and closeted that would be some good foreshadowing. Takes one to know one?

They get spotted by the teacher and duck under the window. Basile is disgusting. The boys ask what the fuck is wrong with him. Basile does not listen to them because he’s incapable of hearing anything over the constant buzzing in his dick and instead starts telling the boys about his BDSM dream about Daphne and the boys try to get him to shut the fuck up as Daphne appears behind him, but obviously he rambles about his boner until he turns around and does this slapstick-y reaction. I cannot stand him. I’m not as angry about the BDSM dream because he was telling the guys and not trying to tell Daphne on purpose, but this kind of content overall just reinforces him as the bumbling loser comic relief and he’s not fucking funny, he’s deeply creepy and is an actual sexual harasser as we see later in the episode.

At least Daphne says it’s all a fantasy in his head and never going to happen. ❤️❤️❤️ FUCKING TELL HIM. DESTROY HIM. She continues to be the best character on Skam France. Daphne asks what they’re doing there and Lucas says they’re checking out the hot chicks. Daphne tells them they suck (❤️❤️❤️) before walking off. The other guys are like, seriously Lucas? “Hot chicks”? Well, I don’t see quite how what he said is any worse than what Basile says constantly, including to girls’ faces, so maybe it’s a translation thing? The “hot chicks” phrasing has stronger meaning in French?

Arthur asks if Basile is OK and he says, “I fucked it all up.” DUDE you had ALREADY fucked it up from the time you first opened your mouth around her. And as we see, this does not deter him at all. God!!!!! Please fuck off into the void already.

I’m glad they called out Lucas a little but again, don’t see how he was being any more disgusting than Basile is on a regular basis regarding the misogyny. They didn’t say anything overtly anti-homophobic about Lucas using slurs, like really call him out other than some shocked reaction at him using that word. So I suppose there’s a little more ambiguity over whether they’ll be accepting of Lucas’ sexuality. (I mean, I think they’ll accept him based on what we know about OG, but in-universe there isn’t as much of a tip-off.) I did miss that more educational moment, but I also think that because Lucas still has some Operation Hetero tactics to implement later that day, he might need to not be roasted for his behavior so strongly or who knows, maybe he’d back down. (The OG had Isak apologize to Emma and then the dance chicks clip with Jonas calling him out; this version switches the scenes around.)

Clip 5 - Love confession?

Later, Lucas sees the boy squad in the yard, then he sees Chloé and Maria. Prompted by the need to seem heterosexual in front of the guys and inspired by what he read the previous night, he goes over to Chloé to get himself a hot girlfriend.

Lucas apologizes to her and he sounds more sincere than fuckboy-ish, which I think fits because the way he pursued her in the first place was not that fuckboy-ish. Slick, but he wasn’t negging her or anything. However, sounding sincere is not being sincere, because this is the biggest crock of shit I’ve heard out of this kid’s mouth this season. It’s so uncomfortably over-the-top, he’s telling her that he met a beautiful first year and he thought it would be casual but actually he’s falling madly in love with her, and OK, slow down. How long have you guys even talked to each other? 10, 15 minutes? Do you know anything about her?

I get Lucas is struggling but I also want to give him a kick in the nuts before he gets another word out and digs that hole deeper because oh my God this is fucking b a d, honestly, way worse than what Isak did to Emma - what Isak did to Emma was not cool, but he was mostly just giving her the indication that he was into her and had a crush, NOT that he had fallen in love with her and had all these deep emotions for her. It’s really cruel to her. (Although girl … are you really gonna fall for this dramatic monologue when you’ve talked to him like three times?)

He talks about how he’s not handling these feelings well because it’s never happened before, thinking about a girl before he goes to sleep and before he wakes up, wondering what to say to her when he runs into her, and well, I sure as fuck buy it’s never happened about a girl before and that it’s not happening about a girl now. But of course he’s talking about Eliott. He’s just transplanting his feelings for a boy to this fake infatuation with a girl. Lucas blames his behavior on not wanting to seem awkward. Well, I can buy that, just not about Chloé.

Despite this load of floral horseshit, Chloé buys it, because well, she is a teenager. She kisses him passionately right there in the yard. The boy squad sees and approves (Yann’s reactions are particularly funny). Heterosexual mask, securely on.

Lucas walks over and he BETTER not be giving Basile pointers because the last thing Basile needs is encouragement, but nope, that’s what he does, he offered to give Basile lessons. This is like telling Tom Riddle about horcruxes.

Eliott thankfully interrupts Lucas contributing to Basile’s dicktermination. Did Eliott see Lucas and Chloé kissing? I don’t think so, but man, I kinda wished he did just for the angst. He doesn’t know Lucas is pissed at him yet, he doesn’t know Lucas is gonna bro-zone him in a moment.

Eliott returns Lucas’ scarf. It’s actually Yann’s scarf and Yann seems very happy to have it back, awww. Lucas gets forcibly casual with Eliott. He’s not mean, not rude, exactly, just trying to play off their connection as nothing. They’re casual acquaintances and it’s gonna stay that way.

Lucas volunteers that Eliott found it in the common room before Eliott can explain how it got it. The acting is pretty good. You can tell Eliott is kinda stung by this greeting, especially when Lucas is like “thanks dude” in an overly platonic way. Which Eliott returns. Eliott is like a warm, friendly guy and that makes it a bummer to see how Lucas reacts and how that makes Eliott deflate.

With Isak and Even, Even noticed Isak’s discomfort in the situation and covered for him, lied for him about finding the hat in the cafeteria. It was a moment that made me love Isak and Even’s relationship before they even got together because even though Isak wasn’t at his best, it was a mark of their connection that Even could read him so easily and didn’t press the situation. Here Lucas shuts out Eliott, he’s covering his own ass. And I’m not sure if Eliott totally realizes what’s going on or if he does pick up on why Lucas is suddenly dude-ing it up and lying. I think he might just be hurt.

Arthur asks about Eliott, and Lucas starts talking shit about how he’s a stalker with no friends. LMAO. Lucas, the stalker is you, the creeper is you, you were legit just stealing classroom registers over Eliott, you were scouring the Internet for clues of his existence, you are projecting like an IMAX.

They get invited to Daphne’s party via text, but Lucas is clearly distracted and looking off toward where Eliott went. What a contrast in assessments between Lucas telling us how he’s falling for Eliott by way of telling Chloé it’s about her, and him downplaying and trashing Eliott to his friends. I don’t feel like he can relax around his friends at all.

Clip 6 - Secret school party

There’s a giant group of people gathered outside the gates of the school at night, with the girl squad in front, lots of people in costumes. Time for Daphne’s party.

Ehhh … see this is a fun setup, breaking into the school to have a party, it really is, but in context it’s kinda contrived IMO. I guess Daphne got peer pressured into doing it, I know she wants people to find the common room the cool place to be, but I find it hard to believe someone who’s legitimately invested into fixing up the common room like she is would risk a) getting in trouble for trespassing on school grounds b) dealing with any damage/repairs to the room that happen during the party, like if your plan is to fix up the common room, isn’t the likely potential that someone could break stuff or trash the room worse for your ultimate goal? I fully realize teenagers do a lot of stupid reckless stuff, but I’d find this party more believable if it were thrown by people who did not have a vested interest in the repair and upkeep of that part of the school. For example, if it had been the Raptors throwing a party at school after hours last season, sure, I buy that.

I feel like they just had this because they had to have a party in episode 3 (like in OG Skam) that was related to the school group/project that linked the POV character and his love interest (like in OG) and something about them hosting the party at another character’s house didn’t fit, not when the project is centered around another location.

One way that I would have found this scenario more plausible: Daphne tries to throw a much much smaller get-together, maybe just invite the common room crew, keep it under wraps, nothing extravagant, but word gets out more and more people show up (because who doesn’t want to break into the school at night) and turn it into this big thing and it gets out of hand. We see it go from just a few people hanging around drinking to something wilder, she starts freaking out because it’s too much. Even with the “password” system it seems like she had something bigger in mind from the beginning and IDK, even with Daphne being a social climber, even with teenagers being idiots, it rings a bit off. Sorry to be a buzz kill, like I said, it’s an entertaining scenario in theory.

Anyway, they’re at the school, people are in costume and waiting outside. Basile is wearing a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles costume. Do you think he wanted the whole squad to go as the turtles, but they did not? They give him weird looks, but dressing as Donatello is legit the least objectionable thing he has done so far this season.

Daphne is dressed as a cat, keeping that Vilde tradition alive.

Lucas has the paint streaks on his cheeks, which is a fun nod to OG and also fitting for the infiltration theme of the party.

Imane says they don’t need the password, Daphne says they do in case there’s a spy. Errr I don’t think a password is going to do you much good. If there’s a mole, I’m sure they got the details from someone else, unless like a 50-year-old teacher is hoping to sneak in unnoticed.

Lol at Yann’s face when he puts on his hood for the “infiltration.” He’s had some great background reactions this episode.

Daphne asks the crowd if they’re ready to infiltrate and they quietly cheer. Basile says “I’ll infiltrate YOU!” and FUCKING KILL HIM, I’M TIRED OF THIS SHIT.

Daphne tells Emma she’s so nervous she almost wore a diaper in case she wet herself and DO NOT LET BASILE HEAR THAT, I REPEAT, DO NOT SAY THAT SHIT WITHIN A FIVE-BLOCK RADIUS OF THAT GUY UNLESS YOU WANT HIM TO START HAVING DIAPER FANTASIES ABOUT YOU IN ADDITION TO BDSM DREAMS.

The gate opens and people cheer because apparently everyone’s an idiot who forgot about the request for discretion 10 seconds ago. Teenagers, man.

Yeah, this is fun in like a Hollywood teen movie way but kinda throwing me out of the story, like even the way the crowd is reacting feels too staged and TV-ish. You know IRL when there’s a group of teenagers rowdy and ready to party, they wouldn’t be super unified in their reactions like that, there would be some d-bags not listening, not paying attention to Daphne, they’d be fucking around and doing their own thing. Nothing inherently wrong with this style but not really what I like from Skam, just my preference!

Clip 7 - Giant neon costume party

There’s like a full-ass rave happening in the school and it’s fun but not to be repetitive, feels more like a Hollywood teen movie even in the scope of the party and the way it’s filmed. Especially - and I’m sorry for harping on this but also, not sorry at all - because Basile’s characterization reminds me of one of those stock characters from those films, like that typical obnoxious loser who’s desperate to get laid and ends up banging Stifler’s mom or something.

Basile slumps next to Alexia and says he’s gonna throw up, she says he’ll be fine. She’s a lovely person, but I want to be like RUN AWAY DO NOT ENGAGE.

She points out that Emma and boy Alex are making out and Basile positively jizzes in his turtle onesie, being like THEY’RE GONNA FUCK???? IN THE SCHOOL???? Is it that outrageous of a concept? What did you think was going to happen when you invited a bunch of drunk teenagers to party after hours?

A girl who looks a bit like Elisabeth Moss walks by and makes eyes at Alexia. Must be Clara! Basile is like, a woman in the same room as me? Can you help me fuck her? Alex says no, it’s her ex, hands off, and that’s Romain’s cue to be like … OHHHH you are bisexual? Alexia cheerfully confirms this. You can see the boner popping in his pants already, let’s be real. Yikes, dude. Her attraction to women isn’t for your enjoyment.

Anyone else getting dancing old man from Six Flags commercials vibes from Arthur dancing in his costume?

Daphne is freaking out and looking out the window, trying to prevent people from smoking. Imane pulls her aside and says everyone’s having fun. Daphne says the smoke detectors might go off and they’ll be in trouble, Imane says she should’ve thought of that before throwing a party in the school. I mean ... yeah? That’s why I’m like, you’re freaking out about this now, you didn’t predict any of these blatantly obvious things that would happen?

Imane’s like “what’s the worst that could happen if they get caught, they won’t expel 50 students at once” and errr IDK, would they have to pay for repairs? Stay after school to clean up the mess? Would the school contact their parents? I can think of a lot of stuff that would suck.

Daphne and Imane go dance. Basile comes up and not only starts to force a dance with Daphne, but in a way that he’s thrusting his crotch against her, trying to touch her and get in her space. Poor Daphne grabs Imane and tries to swing out of the way to avoid him, literally swat him away with her costume’s cat tail.

For fuck’s sake. I hate this guy, I hope Daphne eventually just punches him in the balls. Listen, I try not to talk like that, but this moment really pissed me off. It’s sexual harassment. Daphne has made it extremely clear to Basile that she is not interested in him. She has said it is never going to happen. And he still does not give up, and this was honestly the worst moment he’s done so far IMO because he’s actually physically bothering her, to the point where she grabs her friend as a shield, to the point where she’s having to swat him away.

Tons of women have gone through this experience in real life. We’ve met those sleazy guys who would not take no for an answer. We’ve met those guys who wanted to press their bodies against you and grab you when you have zero interest in them. A lot of us have experiences of latching onto our female friends, or our trusted male friends, in an effort to escape these creeps. Imagine the nastiest guy you know in real life, the one who really sends red flags, and imagine him as Basile, yourself in Daphne’s situation. That’s why I don’t feel I’m overreacting here.

What is the point of this? What is their primary goal with Basile’s character? Comic relief? Or is he meant to be a cautionary tale? Are they building up to a criticism of creepy guy behavior? Because the thing is, they have already established he’s gross. Daphne has rejected him, and he still wants to go after her. I don’t get what more she can do other than beat his ass or complain to the school or something. What, is it going to be like episode 5 when he finally takes a fucking hint? Why was it not obviously clear when she said it was never going to happen? When she tried to escape him at the party? If there’s a more substantial criticism coming, I am genuinely flabbergasted why made Basile 110% disgusting from the very beginning and had Daphne so openly hate his attention, because it feels like the lesson should have happened already. The point has been made.

You know what could have worked better if they were trying to criticize toxic masculinity? Don’t start off Basile as super gross. Make him insecure, desperate, but not panting after Daphne and begging for her phone number. Have his creepiness escalate bit by bit throughout the season, directly encouraged by Lucas’ own fuckboy behavior. Show how those attitudes spread like a disease. Have Daphne show her disinterest, although she’s mostly just annoyed, until finally he crosses a line and then she blows up at him and says it’s never going to happen. Then that’s it. He leaves her the fuck alone. He learns from his mistakes, though he still doesn’t get with Daphne romantically.

Lucas and Chloé are talking about music. Chloé happens to like old school rock like AC/DC and The Clash - coincidentally Lucas’ musical taste, as we learned last episode. I wonder if she actually likes them or she just stalked Lucas and found that information on like his Facebook profile. It’d be funny if she was trying to like what Lucas likes and Lucas was trying to likes what Eliott likes. Because suddenly Lucas isn’t a fan of The Clash anymore, he likes dubstep. Duuuuude, come on. I saw how you responded when Eliott put on that record. I’m just imagining Lucas sitting in his room, forcing himself to listen to dubstep because Eliott likes it, in the way you make a child eat Brussels sprouts.

Mika is at the party and lighting up the dance floor, Chloé says gay guys are so funny, they know how to party. Alexia and Imane who happen to be nearby react to that; Alexia says it was a stupid thing to say and Imane says it was a generalization. Chloé says actually it was a nice thing to say.

Okay, I wasn’t a fan of how they did this moment. The positive side: it’s nice that they made Alexia, a member of the LGBT community, react to that comment and call it out, and had Imane call it out as a generalization, because she as a black Muslim would also know about how generalizations affect marginalized groups.

But no offense, I feel like both S3 remakes so far have missed the point of this moment as it pertains to our POV character. It’s not just a helpful educational moment for the audience. It’s meant as a lifeline to the Isak character. One of Isak’s greatest concerns is how he will be perceived as a gay man, in terms of stereotypes and generalizations. He fears “gay” is a box that will trap him in a certain image, he doesn’t want to be seen negatively as one of those flamboyant gay guys into tights and mascara. He associates “gay” with those generalizations and he fears the social repercussions of that label. We see that when he takes the gay test in episode 3, which is not a measure of attraction to men (as it was in Lucas’ “gay test”) but a collection of stereotypes about gay men’s personality and interests. When he puts down the dance teacher for acting too gay later in the episode, it’s because he wants to distance himself from that type of person. Which is why it’s really important when Even, the guy Isak likes, calls out Emma for using a generalization. Without even knowing the full impact of what he’s saying on Isak, Even provides a counter-argument to the idea that Isak can be summed up as a stereotype. He’s against assigning universal traits to diverse groups of people, and I think he recognizes the trivializing nature of Emma’s comment - gay people are funny to her, it’s like she thinks they’re there to entertain her, it’s this extremely othering remark. Emma is essentially doing something that Isak fears will happen to him if people know he’s gay - just stereotype him and lump him in with all gay people - and Even is there to shut it down.

And you might say, well, Lucas isn’t Isak, so it doesn’t have to mean the same for him, and ... yeah, it doesn’t, but consider that Lucas’ struggle this week was not really about dealing with stereotypes and generalizations. His “gay test” had nothing to do with that at all. Instead, he was struggling with the exact definition of his sexuality, whether he’s gay or bi or straight, and he was trying to fit himself into a heterosexual box not by distancing himself from generalizations but by dating a girl and using homophobic slurs. Like there’s no moment where he calls out a gay guy for acting too gay. When he calls the boys a slur, it’s not actually a response to doing something perceived as gay. So for the “lesson” here to be the same as it was in the original series, and not tailored to Lucas’s specific struggle this week, is a missed opportunity. For example, I think it would have been better if Chloé used some casually homophobic language - not even maliciously, just in the sense that she’s ignorant and doesn’t realize she shouldn’t say some words as a straight girl - and Alex called her out for that. It would be a counterpoint to Lucas’ own behavior.

Also, I don’t think Lucas had a huge reaction to what Alex and Imane said, anyway; it didn’t seem spotlighted in the directing or acting so while it’s a good lesson for the audience to hear, it doesn’t mean a ton to his character’s state of mind. It’s one of those parts that I feel the remakes are recycling because it is important as a general idea, but I don’t feel like they necessarily get why it was there in terms of Isak’s characterization.

Additionally, can’t lie, very disappointed that Eliott didn’t get this moment. I appreciate them giving Alexia a lot to do this season, but this part felt really big for Even in the original show, both in characterizing him and in showing how much Isak was affected by his words, because Isak really likes Even and values his opinion (you know, the whole Isak becoming Nas’ #1 fan in a week thing). This is the guy Isak has a crush on who’s shutting down homophobic stereotypes - that made it so important that this dialogue came from Even rather than anyone else. And on a personal note, that clip was the very first Skam clip I ever saw, and that specific moment where Even calls out Emma was not only the first part to impress me and grab my attention, but it made me love Even right off the bat. I loved that he could explain why positive generalizations are still bad because that’s a nuance I think plenty of people, both young and old, don’t understand. It just was a bit of a downer that this really powerful moment didn’t go to Eliott.

Lucas sees Eliott come in with his girlfriend. Eliott has a mask, covering the lower half of his face. How raccoon-ish? But very fitting for the theme of infiltration, and very fitting for his character to be ambiguous and mysterious.

Eliott’s girlfriend is named Lucille, lmao. Lucas and Lucille! Not weird at all! But what’s the significance of gving them both light-related names?

Of course we have the two pairs dancing, Lucas and Chloé and Eliott and Lucille. Lucas stares at Eliott in a very obvious way, like Isak could at least glance at Even over Emma’s shoulder. Lucas has to blatantly turn his head to look at Eliott. He smashes his face into Chloé’s while making eye contact with Eliott, and Eliott obviously sees this and takes it as a personal challenge. He makes out with Lucille and then stares Lucas in the eye. Again, very challenging. With Isak it was more like this painful longing watching Even kiss Sonja, and then Even looked at him not so much as a challenge but to convey his interest in Isak; Isak didn’t keep looking back for that long before he shut his eyes and kissed Emma, probably imagining it was Even. Lucas kissed Chloé first; Eliott was not making out with Lucille until he caught Lucas staring at him with his lips on Chloé’s. Then it was to convey interest and almost a dare for the other to look away first. Very bold of Lucas, although IDK if he was actually trying to issue a challenge or a fuck-you to Eliott or he’s just bad at impulse control. I think the “fuck you” was pretty implied. In more ways than one.

Not gonna lie, the eye-fucking went on long enough that if it had gone on a moment longer, it would start to feel like a parody to me. I was glad the music got cut off and the lights went on when they did.

Everyone bolts and runs out of the school, Daphne seems to be behind everyone. Basile, do something good for once and distract the guard so Daphne can escape! Throw yourself on that grenade!

Lucas just stops and stands there like an idiot, like I know you’re distracted by your Eliott boner and all but move your goddamn ass, until Eliott grabs him by the arm and pulls him to the side. Eliott offers to walk him home.

Eliott really just left his girlfriend behind, huh? I know Even did it too, but he just left Sonja to go hang out and drink with everyone else, not get caught by a night watchman.

I’m not someone who goes gaga over height differences to the extent that a lot of people do, but that sure is a quality height difference between Lucas and Eliott, made very clear by them walking side by side.

As they’re walking, Eliott says it seems are moving fast between Lucas and Chloé. Lucas says it’s cool but then backtracks and says she’s super into him and it’s stressing him out. Eliott looks a little pleased to hear that. He asks Eliott how long he and Lucille have been together, Eliott says a while. Lucas says it shows - errrr, how? You’ve spent like 10 seconds and two words in her company and all you did was see him briefly kiss her hello and then make out on the dance floor, like Emma and Alex have done that much and they’re not even officially together. He’s bitter, I guess. Any girl with Eliott has been with him too long.

Eliott says he thinks his relationship with Lucille is at an end, though, they’re just going in circles, he doesn’t want that. Lucas is like, to be in a relationship? Probably thinking GODDAMMIT. Eliott says he does want to be in a relationship. Lucas is like, so you see yourself with a new girl straight away? Eliott says yeah, and then after a pause, adds not necessarily a girl, though. That pause is what’s important, tbh, the little moment where he’s perhaps thinking of just coming out and saying it to Lucas. Making clear that his sexuality includes guys, making clear that Lucas is on the menu. And of course Lucas kneejerk looks at him like OH SHIT HE SAID IT.

Lucas looks at him, Eliott looks at him, there’s a Moment. They arrive at Lucas’ place. With this music and the way they’re looking at each other, it’s not so much awkward, more like they’re daring each other to take the next step. Eliott says this is where they say good night. The way Eliott glimpses upwards makes me think he was hoping to be invited up (not even to bone, to be clear, just to hang out/make out), and they’re staring at each other when in the background someone’s getting out of a car and taking bags out of a trunk.

They are hardcore staring at each other and it seems like Eliott moves in just a teeny tiny bit when Manon’s all HEYYYY GUYSSSSS. Lucas looks back at Eliott like, oh, never mind.

IDK how I feel about that ending moment. I feel like it lacks the punch of Manon arriving home, and weirdly downplays the Lucas/Eliott moment. Maybe because the music continues - I would’ve cut off the music when Manon said hello, to break them out of their little bubble, then show her there, cut back to Lucas and Eliott staring at her in shock, in silence. This just felt a little muddled and didn’t land as much emotionally for me.

I’m not like ... angry at Manon for interrupting, I think she could’ve just looked away and pretended to be busy with her bags instead of calling attention to herself. She seems pretty invested in giving Lucas nudges out of the closet, or wanting him to open up to her about it, based on her behavior in other episodes. Like I think she means well, it’s just intrusive. Did she want to interrupt them so Lucas didn’t out himself in front of her? That doesn’t seem entirely congruent with her repeatedly asking him if he’s dating someone or asking about Eliott in the next episode.

The Lucas/Eliott relationship also feels way more of an inevitability at this point. Eliott isn’t saying he can’t break up with Lucille, his comment about “not necessarily a girl” could not be any more pointed. I’m wondering if they’ll bring as much drama with Lucille later on; if they do play out the part where Eliott goes back to Lucille after telling Lucas he wants to be with him, I think they should’ve kept in that part as it’s important foreshadowing. Not just for his relationship with Lucille, but his bipolar disorder and inner conflict. Like there were zero hints of a conflict within Eliott in this scene, he’s just like, yeah, I should break up with her, maybe I’ll have a relationship with someone who’s not a girl, hint hint. So Lucas really should not be doubting Eliott’s intentions at this stage, frankly. It’s Lucas who’s apparently the obstacle, and who knows how long before he gives in to Eliott’s Eliottness.

Social Media/General Comments:

Yann texts Lucas “Kisses bro” after the locker conversation so basically he’s a stand-up pal, it’s very cute.

Basile at least apologized to Lucas via text for blowing up at him because Basile didn’t get his dick serviced on Friday. He also said he’s not even into Maria anymore, it’s about Daphne now, siiiiiiigh. When he asked about Lucas’ mom, Lucas didn’t really answer, said it was nothing and he was handling it. I mean, if Basile has a mentally ill mom like Magnus, this conversation might take on more significance later, like he could’ve gotten Basile’s advice all along.

On a related note, I know I stroked that Basile hateboner so hard this recap that I’m chafed, and sorry if it got repetitive. But also - he’s bad. He’s really, really bad. And if my comments are repetitive, the show is also repetitive in giving Basile approximately one character trait that’s extremely exaggerated. I don’t think we’ve had one “normal” scene with this guy where he didn’t say something awful, like the closest was the first clip he was in.

Lucas is getting very chummy with the girl squad and taking pics with them. He’s also getting alarmingly cutesy with Chloé, posting a pic of her and using emoji hearts. Though that’s a good detail, of course, it’s him trying to act straight.

Is it just me or have they toned down some of the social media presence from last season? I don’t mind it, I think a lot of the SM stuff is more focused on things relevant to the story.

I’m not even getting into the Eliott puzzle stuff. It’s fun but I’m just gonna sit back and watch it happen, otherwise my brain will melt.

Everyone who attended that party is a total fucking dumbass for posting pictures and IG stories of themselves where they are clearly at the school and in the common room on Friday night. I know that teenagers are not necessarily the best at discretion, but LMAO at the theme of the party being “infiltration” and Daphne trying to have a password when everyone’s posting pictures where people are easily identifiable. If shit had gotten out of hand, then they’d all be screwed. Although this is an obvious consequence of throwing a party in the school, you know some people are going to plaster it all over social media. Not hard to predict. IDK, maybe I’m just a worst case scenario type of person, but imagine if shit got really out of hand, like someone started a fire or there was major property damage or who knows, something even worse, and there had to be an investigation. All of you idiots are fucked.

Being honest, in some ways I thought this was the weakest of the three episodes so far - not that it was bad, there were certainly good moments. I think they did a solid job with Lucas’ internalized homophobia, as unpleasant as it was to watch, and Alex’s talk about bisexuality was a strong addition to the story. There were some good acting moments. But I felt more of the weaknesses that Skam France had in its previous two seasons. Things like reusing certain moments from Skam while not really fitting or understanding why they were there, more like feeling they had to be there, or some parts that I thought didn’t quite make sense, some moments that were rushed or didn’t have much impact due to the directing.

I’m thinking that this episode is going to be a particular challenge for various remakes to adapt. Some of it might be that it’s very internal, in a way, with what Isak is going through, and that’s not always the easiest to portray. I also felt like OG had a clear thesis statement of sorts with what Julie intended to accomplish with this episode, in terms of the overall story, and it’s something where you can lose the subtleties if you’re not careful.

This reaction probably seems more negative than I actually felt, because overall I did like the episode and still enjoy the season, it’s just that breaking it down and thinking about it more critically, there were more little things that bugged me this week than in the first two.

I’m not French so feel free to clarify if I missed something.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

#skamfr reactions #skam france reactions

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