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honeydazai · 2 years

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jealousy headcanons - Bungo Stray Dogs

feat.: Dazai, Chūya, Atsushi, Akutagawa, Ranpo, Oda, Fyodor, Nikolai, Sigma

warnings: nsfw implications, possessive behaviour, mentions of violence

While DAZAI doesn't get jealous particularly often, it's simply in his nature to be dramatic, which is why he immediately clings to your side the second he notices the way you're talking to an overly friendly stranger.

It seems like he just can't keep his hands to himself; he's touching you everywhere, large palms roaming over your body and coming to rest on your hips, his lips on your neck while he keeps his gaze on the guy who had been hitting on you, his eyebrows raised as if in challenge. He won't stop even if you scold him — the only way to hinder him from outright groping you in public is to leave.

The moment you're alone again, he's whining and pouting about how mean you are for paying another man this much attention, though there's something about his complaining that just seems off, and you'll never know if he's actually jealous or if he's simply acting. Either way, he's definitely sucking dark hickeys into your skin later that day until blue and purple blossoms on your skin; the bruises too dark and high up your neck to possibly hide with clothing.

“Oh, bella, you're so cruel, paying more attention to another man than to your boyfriend. You simply enjoy making me suffer, don't you? Ah, well, at least that guy made some funny faces when we made out in front of him.”

It takes quite a lot for CHŪYA to get jealous. He's too confident to immediately feel insecure or threatened the second you talk to another guy, though his endurance does, of course, have its limits. One of those limits is met when you, during a shopping trip, suddenly stumble upon an ex partner of yours.

He's incredibly protective of you, which is why he immediately pulls you closer to him when it becomes increasingly obvious how uncomfortable you are, one arm around your waist and his body shielding yours. If your ex seems keen on a fight, Chūya doesn't back down — it's unlikely they can last even a minute against him anyway.

If he ever has any reason to get actually jealous, he pouts and sulks a little, even though he'll constantly deny that he is. Still, you can easily win him over again just by some physical affection and sweet words.

“Oh, fuck off. Just leave us alone and this doesn't have to end violently. What? Me? Scared? Hah, you're joking — come on, idiot, I was trying to be nice here, but if you're not one for words, that's not my fault.”

ATSUSHI isn't jealous or possessive in the slightest; monitoring who you talk to isn't even a possibility in his mind. Still, he's slightly disgruntled when you suddenly press your lips to Dazai's forehead in a friendly gesture — he knows that your relationship to Dazai is purely platonic, but forehead kisses were always your thing.

He tries not to let it show that it's bothering him; really, he doesn't want to come across as overbearing and he's quite afraid of you being scared of him. His ability can be intimidating, definitely, but he'd never hurt you — or anyone, really, without a solid reason to.

Because of this, he won't speak up about what's bothering him, though it doesn't take a genius to figure out that something is wrong. If you, however, reassure him that forehead kisses are still your thing and that you of course don't crush on Dazai, he's easily consoled.

“Hm? No, I'm not angry at you, of course not. I just—, I don't know. I always thought that was our thing and — what? I'm not jealous! But it's nice to know you still love me most. I love you too.”

There's no denying it that AKUTAGAWA gets jealous easily. He wants your attention to be on him constantly, not on someone else, which is why it's no surprise when he quickly approaches you after seeing you chat with a stranger. He stands obnoxiously close behind you, his eyes narrowed as he stares daggers at the other guy.

While he's usually not one for PDA, he's suddenly very adamant on touching you somehow; he's got a hand on your hip or an arm around your waist, and he looks horribly stiff while doing it, but you can't change his mind about him trying to show everyone you're taken.

He's not shy to outright threaten the guy you're talking to, and even less afraid to make said threats reality. If one more civilian falls victim to Rashōmon, the Port Mafia knows how to cover it up.

“We're busy. Leave. If you don't, I'll make sure you regret it. You'd be lucky to have one of your limbs left by the time I'm done with you.”

With RANPO, it's less the fear of losing you and more his frustration about the sudden lack of attention he's getting from you. When you suddenly spend the whole day with Dazai, he can't help but get pouty.

He first tries to convince you to pay attention to him again instead, though if that doesn't work, he decides that two can play this game. He ignores you completely and acts as if you don't even exist, all the while being in a worse mood than usually, his lips pushed forward as he's pouting. You can, however, win him back over if you beg him enough and bring him his favourite sweets to convince him. Ranpo is another one to mark you up later that day; hickeys and bruises soon decorating your throat and neck.

“I really don't care enough about you to talk to you right now — oh, wait, what's that you've got there? Are those for me? Well, fine. You've been begging for my attention for a while now. Guess I can take pity on you.”

Honestly, ODA doesn't get jealous. He's confident in your love for him and in his for you, and that alone enough for him to not have to worry about it when you chat with a stranger, who's unashamedly hitting on you.

If you intend on teasing him through making him jealous, you're in tough luck — he won't react to it at all. Besides, the way you're trying to rile him up is pretty obvious anyway. He is, however, fiercely protective of you, which is why he'll immediately step in whenever he notices you feel uncomfortable; he's got an arm around your waist as he pulls you back against his broad frame, and even though he refuses to kill, he'll do anything to defend you.

“Hm? Oh, no. Of course I don't mind when you talk to that guy, love. Have fun. Why are you looking at me that way? What, should I mind it? Is he bothering you?”

It takes a lot for FYODOR to actually get jealous. While he is rather possessive, he's also confident enough in himself to know that you would never — and also wouldn't be able to — leave him for someone else.

He is, however, incredibly perceptive, which is why it doesn't take long for him to notice the matching rings you and Nikolai seem to be wearing. Fyodor doesn't really care much about your friendship, honestly, but what does bother him is what matching rings represent — if there's anyone you're going to marry, it's going to be him.

How he's going to address this topic truly depends on your personality; he either just orders you to take the ring off or persuades you through sweet words and expensive gifts. Whichever way it is, he'll reach his goal in the end, and he's also determined to keep you at least slightly further away from Nikolai from now on.

“Oh? What have you got there, my love? A ring? Ah, what a shame. Oh, it's nothing. It just so happened that I, too, had gotten a ring for you. A real one, obviously, but I fear you care more for Nikolai's gift. Am I wrong?”

While one of NIKOLAI's most important beliefs is personal freedom, that idea doesn't extend to you. He's a bit of a hypocrite, really, but he can't help that he wants you all to himself — you're way too precious for him to possibly let go of you, ever.

He grimaces when you begin to talk fondly about your ex, because even though he knows you're not in a relationship with them anymore, he doesn't enjoy the thought of another person touching you and knowing your body as intimately as he does. Still, at the moment he simply listens to you, nodding and smiling and gaining more information on them, like their name and job.

If he comes home that night smelling like blood, don't mention it.

“Oh, I see. So you shared an apartment back then, hm? And they still live there? Oh, no, doll, it doesn't bother me at all if you talk about them! Don't you worry your pretty little head about that.”

Honestly, SIGMA gets jealous easily, though he's able to hide his feelings pretty well. He doesn't mean to be controlling, either — he's simply scared of losing you. You mean so much to him and he can't bear the thought of being all alone again.

The second he notices the way a customer at the casino shamelessly hits on you, he grimaces, already making his way over to you. His first action is to interrupt the conversation simply by talking to you, though it's obvious that the guy isn't so easily deterred. Sigma isn't afraid to tell him you're neither single nor interested, though it, however, only gets worse from then on.

Since, apparently, all words are wasted on this man, Sigma doesn't hesitate to have him thrown out of the casino. This might be an overreaction but, well, can you blame him for wanting you to be safe and comfortable in his establishment?

“Are you alright? You probably could have handled that alone, I know, dear. I just want you to feel safe here. I love you.”

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notes: hello BSD fandom i am back after a few months with more content, please don't betray me through letting this flop kiss

tags: @irethepotato-reblogs @beandaifuku @The-foreigner @ranpobb @arixsux @dei-lilxc @atsyushi @satoruislove @pastelsbaby @marina-and-the-memes @texchou @shiggysredhead @savagemickey03 @rosepxtlz @nikolaiswife @okura-s @ladykatakuri @lunerenzo @berywritesstuff @alicesblog

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bonny-kookoo · 3 years

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Bunny Boy: Timeskip.

In which as time has passed, Jungkooks sick mind might have finally infected yours as well- tainting his angel to one day go down to hell with him.

Tags/Warnings: graphic description of murder, touching without permission, graphic descriptions of disgust? dunno what to call it, Bunny Boy Jungkook being himself, we all missed his psycho ass lets be real, arson, someone falls down a construction site, oopsie, graphic descriptions of murder pt2, gore, blood, lack of remorse, psychosis, very twisted view of the world, you know me by now, smut, protected smut of course, the usual shabang, kids pls don't read, you'll do it anyways won't you

----

Jungkook has somehow lied himself to the top of the foodchain.

There's still a lot of things he can't afford, but then again, considering he's basically lived in a rat's nest with you a year ago makes his new home in the high top apartment complex in the middle of Seoul feel as luxurious as the most expensive suite available for rent in the entire country. He can sometimes even sneak in a bottle of champagne at the end of the month- a treat he loves to share with you at night, always amused by the way you turn bold the more your alcohol level rises. He enjoys seeing you so out of it, weirdly enough, but then again; you're at his mercy every second of the time you're sober as well.

You're allowed to exist, because he want's you to, after all.

But you've come to feel very much a sense of comfort with every controlling touch of his- a reassurance if you will, that no matter the case, you're still wanted at his side, still allowed to live and spend your life with him. It gives you confidence to have him show you off to his coworkers; his fond gaze and words dipped in honey enough to make you fall to his very feet- but then again, at least in the public eye, you have to uphold a certain sense of common courtesy.

Although you know, he wouldn't mind it either way.

Right now however, you know he'd be fuming, the hand of his coworker feeling heavy like led on your shoulder, not at all wanted there at all. You don't even know why he's here, why he's invaded your home like this, bottle of wine in hand as if that would somehow make it any better. You've tried to tell him he's not wanted here in the nicest way's you could think of, getting desperate as you realize you're not at all as good at talking as Jungkook is- because he's still here, still in your kitchen, still touching you and infecting you with whatever germs living on his skin, and you feel the need to vomit. No one is ever allowed to touch you but Jungkook, he always makes sure to keep you at a distance with people, hell, you don't even shake hands with anyone you meet-

"Listen, I know this may seem bold-" He starts, voice nowhere near as silky smooth as Jungkook's always was. It has a rough undertone like sandpaper, scratching and making your grit your teeth as you force your brows to stay where they are, not allowed to give away your disgust of the entire situation. Somehow everything about this man is absolutely vile to you, from the overbearing cologne he's wearing, to the tie that's horribly done- you always tie Jungkook's, you always make sure its nice and this man just seems so out of place here. He's too tall, too broad, too bold, too close. "But I've seen the way that Jungkook acts around you. Bosses you around." He says, and you can't help the way your expression changes slightly. "You don't deserve this. A woman should be treated nice- I could treat you nice." He offers, and you swallow down the bile rising as you realize what he's saying. He takes a step closer- and you take two back, until your back meets the kitchen counter. "You know I'm right." He says, and you decide to flee.

"I- I'm gonna uhm, heat up some f-food.." You say, escaping his presence by running behind the counter, occupying yourself with whatever you can find there. He walks past you with a sickening smile, something that makes you feel even worse in your skin, as you have to realize how he's tainting your home with his presence. He's touching things, leaving his traces everywhere, as he walks into the bathroom to relieve himself.

Jungkook won't be back home until the next four hours pass.

You have to protect your home.

You have to act this time.

He's horribly drunk- and he won't leave your house.

Your patience is wearing thin, having thought that once he was intoxicated you could get rid of him by talking him into taking a cab home- but you soon come to the conclusion that this was just the easy way out.

Was the world testing you? Were the gods testing if you had what it took to be worthy of staying at Jungkooks side? He has killed for you before, you remember.

Maybe you had to even it out.

The man on the couch is snoring, by now asleep as you remember his name. Yamato was his name- a former classmate of yours from long ago, a young man who never really gave you any attention at all. Not like he could compare to Jungkook ever- no one could, you remind yourself. Jungkook was your soulmate, your everything. And this house was now tainted in another man's presence. You shuddered at the thought, suddenly snapping.

The oven is quick to heat up as you stuff it with all the backing sheets you can find, almost burning your hand in the process as you become frantic. There's no use in caring for this house anymore, you didn't need any physical possessions anyways as long as you had Jungkook. He would make it better, he would figure things out. As soon as he was with you again, you could breathe- and for now, you had to try and not suffocate.

Smoke blurrs your vision, dipping everything in a faded hue as the fire alarm doesn't go off. Its not supposed to- Jungkook had forgotten to change the batteries in it, never really having gotten around to change them after taking them out and realizing he didn't have the right one's at hand. It was a silly mistake on his side really; or maybe a higher power setting the right scene for you to act on your love for him. You finally realized why Jungkook in the past had done the things he did. You only did them out of love as well- you only did this because it was necessary. It needed to be done.

The flames are now licking his up the walls, eager to eat up the wallpaper you both had chosen when you had moved into this place half a year ago. You can't be bothered with them turning black and peeling off the walls, rather fixated by the sight as Yamato on the couch suddenly coughs, falling to the ground from the lack of oxygen in his lungs. Your own burn as well, but you can't move, having to watch him as he looks at you in horror. "What're you doing?!" He rasps out, coughing. "Don't stand there-!" He yells.

Jungkook never yells at you, you think.

"My mom always said that we all get what we deserve in life." You say, as Yamato struggles to breathe. "But she always called her marriage a disappointment she had to settle for." You explain, sitting on the floor now as to not fall over from the dizziness in your head. "I've always been a good kid." You say, unsure who you're even telling this by now, since the man in front of you had stopped moving while the flames start to lick on his clothes, hungry as they devour the black slacks he's wearing. "And you're right." You say, smiling as you crawl over to him before you scoot back then the fire burns your arm. "I deserve better." You say, coughing before getting up. "While you all continue to be dissapointed." You say, finally grabbing your phone, and calling Jungkook- knowing by the sound of the faint firetruck somewhere in the distance, you don't need to call for them no more. As soon as he picks up, you're grinning from ear to ear. "Jungkookie.." You drawl, before laying on your back, coughing violently, phone falling out of your hands.

"Angel?" Jungkook asks, before he hears you coughing. "Angel-"

"Jungkook, isn't that your apartment?" Min Yoongi asks, a coworker and higher up of his, who's standing at the window that has a large view over the city- and he's right. The bright orange light, shining way too saturated to just be the living room light, was exactly your apartment you shared with him. He'd chosen is because of this specific reason- he can see it from his own office downtown. "Go." Yoongi says, and Jungkook can't even bother to put on a jacket as he runs down the stairs instead of taking the elevator, people staring as he runs past them as quickly as his feet can carry him. There's an ambulance, then two, then an array of firetrucks dashing past him, way faster than he is, and for a moment he thinks about jumping up on one of the ladders the cars carry- but they're too fast for him, so he just ignores all the red lights, almost getting run over on his way.

His mind is empty, no thoughts can make their presence known inside his head.

He can taste iron on his breath as he finally makes it to the scene, police holding him back as he watches the flames reach out of your shattered living room window. "Sir-"

"That's MY fucking Apartment burning, with MY fucking fiancé in it-!" He barks at them, unknowingly having started to cry already at the realization of your body still inside. What if you're dead? What if you're already gone? He already has the plan inside of his head to go after you, to reach you, when theres a stretcher carried out, a body on it. "Please- Angel! Let me through, I need to-" He barks, before the police nods to one another, letting him through so he can finally reach you inside the ambulance.

"Sir-" The paramedic asks, but Jungkook shuts her off instantly, sitting down on the small seat at the side, eyes wide open as they stare at the burns on your skin, and closed eyes- an oxygen mask on your face.

"Fiancé." He simply breathes out. "I'm.. her fiancé. We're supposed to get married in December this year.." He says almost without any sound, whispering it like the words were too delicate to say out loud.

"And you will, we'll make sure she come's through all fine." The paramedic hits the small window to the front of the car, signalling to start driving. "We've given her some drugs, that's why she's unconscious. Its safer this way until we know the extend of injuries." The paramedic tells Jungkook. "But I'm confident she'll be just fine." The lady smiles, as Jungkook can't help but reach out and hold your hand, softly, as if you'll break if he touches too hard.

---

At the hospital, he doesn't sleep. And when he does, it's always the same dream.

A memory he cherishes.

"It's so high up." You wonder as you stand on the balcony, dressed in a large white shirt and some shorts, ready for bed. Your hair is a bit unruled, but your face is bare of any makeup- relaxed, cheeks a bit red from the slight wind blowing. He liks you most like this, raw and unpolished, just for his eyes to see. He knows that his next action is the right one, as he looks at you like this. Walking up behind you, he wraps his arms around your smaller form, relishing in the feeling of you almost captured by him like this, with his head on your back, before he kisses the back of your neck.

"I know." He answers your statement a bit later. "It's nice, isn't it?" He asks.

You nod. "Like we're angels in heaven, looking down onto earth." You say, and he smiles, amused by your still so innocent way of looking at the world around you. You were his angel, after all. Untainted. Pure.

And all his.

"Oh?" You wonder, looking at a small black box he holds in front of you now, his head next to yours as his chin was placed on your shoulder. He's not asking you, after all. He's simply informing you.

"I finally managed to buy it." He says, as he opens the box, a small ring inside, that he pulls out, to put onto your finger. As he does this, you notice a similar one on his hand as well. "Now I can do this right." He hums warmly against your back, and you feel mesmerized by the sight of the small stone reflecting the city lights around you.

"Jungkook.." You start, unsure what to say.

"Just say yes." He mumbles against the shell of your ear, as you giggle.

"Of course I say yes. What else could I say to you?" You say, and he chuckles along, holding you a bit tighter.

"Smart girl." He simply says.

But right now, all he can really see is you in that hospital bed.

He's unsure what to think, considering he's by now been informed that there was another person in your apartment, another man at that, and he knows you'd never betray him like this. The only thing he can now think of is, why. Why was he there, and why did the fire start?

As you open your eyes, he leans over you, eyes locked with yours as you can't even manage to look around before he speaks. "What happened?" He asks, voice calm and neutral as he asks you that question, hands pressed against the mattress on either side of your head where he leans. "Why was Yamato at our house? While I wasn't home?" He questions, and your voice is raspy as you answer, able to hold his gaze.

"He came.." You start, clearing your throat a little. "Over with a bottle of wine. Said he.. didn't know you weren't home." You explain, and Jungkooks skin grows cold as you suddenly tear up. "I'm sorry Jungkook, I didn't know what else to do-" You start, as he shakes his head, holding your face as he forces you to focus.

"No no no, no freaking out yet. What. Happened." He asks, presses on, as you hiccup your way through the entire situation.

"He kept- kept touching me, Jungkook he- he used the bathroom, he talked bad about you, he kept looking at me-" You say, and Jungkook grows more restless. You wouldn't.. would you? "I had to." You say, suddenly calm again, as you close your eyes, evening your breathing. "He ruined it, Jungkook. He ruined our home, he should've never been there, I couldn't live there no longer, not after he was in there." You say. "I'm so sorry." You mumble.

"You set the fire?" Jungkook asks, now eerily soft-spoken as his hand caresses your cheek. "For what angel? Hm? What did he say?" He wonders.

"That you.. boss me around. That he could do better. Treat me better." You say, growing tired again. "You've done so much for me, I had to.." You mumble, not really fully there yet. "Jungkook, do you still love me?" You ask, and Jungkook connects the dots himself.

"Of course." He says, smiling down on you before he presses a kiss to your lips. "Now more then ever before."

---

It should've all ended there.

But now its Jungkook, who's got himself dug knee-deep into trouble. "So, all you gotta do is write a nice little amount to my bank account, and we're good." The man says, waving his phone around as if to taunt Jungkook. "After all, you wanna keep being able to spoil your soon-to-be wife, no?" He chuckles, and that's when Jungkook snaps, walking forwards.

Technically, to his own defense, he only wanted to intimidate the man.

Somehow, it felt weird to him, how he could basically re-imagine the way the guy must have popped open like the grape he'd stepped on this morning when he'd hit the concrete below, even though he hadn't seen it himself. But he had it coming, Jungkook assures himself, it was an accident, he chants in his head, as he feels his heart rate slow down, the phone equally destroyed next to the man on the ground- and the security cameras only capturing video, not sound.

Yoongi down below gasps as he opens the door and spots the pile of guts and bones on the ground, having been alerted by the loud crash. A look upwards was all he needs to connect 2 and 2. "Call an ambulance. Police too." He calls up calmly. "Lets hope you're good at acting." He mumbles, holding a hand to his mouth as he averts his gaze, before ushering the other curious office workers back inside, but not before falling forwards, stumbling so to say over the step into the office building.

Sneaking the SD card into his pocket.

#bts imagine #bts #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #bts smut #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts jungkook #bunny boy asks #bunny boy kook

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221bshrlocked · 3 years

Text

masked in desperation

Pairing: Din Djarin x Fem!Reader

Word count: 6044

Warnings: Verbal Degradation. Physical Humiliation involving Din making reader wet herself. Dirty Talk. Penetrative, Non-Protective Sex (wrap the shlong before you king kong por favor). Rough then Soft Din. Don't worry, this is consensual and there is aftercare involved.

No summary because I don't even know what to call this? All you guys need to know is that this fic is based on/inspired by the following asks [x] [x] [x] [x]

A/N: Uhhh this is new for me so I'm sorry if I didn't get the dynamic involved with a humiliation kink right. Please let me know how I could correct anything should there be something off. This was supposed to be rougher...but I turned soft midway because nervous Din makes me warm. I hope you like it nonetheless though. Comments are hella appreciated. And you can add yourself to the taglist here. Enjoy and please don't @ me once you finish this fic. And I apologize that it took long, this semester was hell.

It was an act of crazed desire concealed beneath irritation and anger, irritation with you for managing to claw yourself into his heart and anger at himself for allowing you to do so freely. He couldn't deny his feelings anymore, not if he wanted to retain whatever sanity he had left around you. What started out as nothing but stress relief and a way to help with the pain left behind by Grogu leaving turned into Din wishing he could stake his claim on you every moment of every day so you wouldn't seek anyone else out. Not that he genuinely believed you would. Still...

And it wasn't like this was any different from what the two of you usually do. At least that's what he says to excuse his twisted behavior, to not dwell too much on his sick, possessive fantasies.

It was driving him mad. He wanted to mark you up, always did during those passionate nights, loved watching as you tried, and failed, to cover up his love bites and handprints from the guild members. But he also craved to feel the same way. He wanted to bear traces of you on him so people knew how much he cared for you, perhaps even recognized the hold you have on him. The only problem was, no one would ever see the angry nail scratches and bite marks you left every night on his skin because of his beskar. So this, this would do the trick, even if it was barely noticeable, even if it would be gone when he washed his beskar, even if the two of you would be the only ones who knew what happened behind closed doors.

The weird thing was, he doesn't even know how he got to this point. Well, that's not true. He can actually trace his way to this moment, but he feels ashamed to do so? Reluctant maybe. It didn't matter what he was feeling at this point. All he knew was that he needed to watch you as you humiliated yourself in front of him, and had no power to do anything about it. Perhaps it was because, deep down, he wanted to show you that he'd accept you no matter what. He wanted to prove to you that he may just be worthy of having you in his arms. He wanted to assure you that he would be committed to you until his dying breath. And this, in some way, was the solution.

Before he can reevaluate and dwell too much on his decision, he fills a cup with water and heads towards you, ignoring the Marshal's glances as he approaches you and taps on your shoulders.

"Yeah?" You turn around, and Din forces himself to stand his ground when he sees your smile growing wider as you take the water from his hand. "Oh aren't you sweet. Careful, or else they'll think you're growing soft." You tease him as you down the cup of water and hand it back to him before returning to fixing the ship. He says nothing as he walks back towards the cantina, and resumes his quiet meditation.

And that's how it goes for the next couple of hours. He brings you a cup of water every so often, murmuring something or other about how he doesn't have time to take care of you if you suffered from a heat stroke before leaving immediately. Din quietly thanks the maker for your discomfort with public refreshers, because this plan wouldn't have worked if you decided to go to the cantina or elsewhere to relieve yourself. He's locked his ship's refresher and made sure to not be anywhere in sight when you sought him out to ask about the issue with the door.

He feels himself grow harder when he notices you squirming as you work on the ship, softly palming himself through his pants when you halt your movements every couple of minutes to either cross your legs or push your hand between your thighs to attempt and alleviate some of that pain. A part of him feels horrible for putting you through this, but something tells him it will be worth it in the end. Din Djarin isn't a man of prayer, but he pleads to whatever higher power that created you that this wouldn't backfire and make you leave him.

As the twin suns slowly set beneath the sky, Din moves away from where he's been hiding and heads towards the ship, making sure he is in your line of sight as he walks up the ramp and towards his armory. He quickly takes out the durasteel cuffs from where he's set them, hiding them behind his back as he pretends to head towards the cockpit.

However, he stops when he sees you rushing past him and setting all of your tools aside. You're mumbling angrily beneath your breath when things begin to fall over, growling when you try to fix them a couple of more times, and they continue to fall.

"Motherfucking shit," Din hears you swear as you carelessly try to set the box again and it falls over. Shaking your head, you turn around and sprint past him again towards the refresher. His eyes never leave your shaking form as you push on the refresher button numerous times and nothing happens.

"Pfassk! Din, how angry would you be if I broke this fucking door right now?" You try to grab the gun on his holster but he is quicker than you, slamming his hand on your own to prevent you from taking it.

"Extremely." His answer is short and straight to the point, mostly because he can't trust himself to respond to you without giving himself away.

"God please I- I need..." You hesitate and try to remove your hand from him, only to feel his hold tighten around your wrist. He thought you'd break and confess what you needed to do due to your desperation, but you don't, holding your tongue and looking up at him quizzically when he removes your wrist and clasps one side of the cuff on them.

"Din, what- what're you doing?" You look down and watch as he clasps the cuffs on your other wrist and ensures that they aren't too tight around your wrists before he locks them. Before you can ask him again, Din drags you across the ship and into the cockpit, ignoring your annoyed murmurs as he sits down and pulls you onto his lap.

You squirm around and try to get up but Din’s hold on your waist tightens and he slides you against his beskar until you fall into his chest. He says nothing as you push away and try to maneuver yourself so your legs aren’t wide open. He chuckles lowly when he sees how much you’re struggling, finally allowing you to put some space between the two of you. You rest your back against the controls board and take a few deep breaths before you stare at him.

“Can you please let me go?” You ask patiently, and hope he sees how genuine and serious you’re being. When he sits back but keeps his hold on you, you know he isn’t going to make this easy.

“Why?”

“Because I- I need to take care of something,” you look away when you respond and Din feels his cock twitch in his pants at the sudden shyness taking over.

“How about you let me take care of you?” He takes his gloves off and throws them aside, smiling to himself when he sees you shiver as he moves his hands up and down your body. You watch him like a hawk and you feel yourself growing wet for a moment, but you realize this reaction is the last thing you want to experience in his presence right now.

“Wait Din- just...it’s not like that.” You bite your lower lip and stifle a moan when he cups your tits and softly flicks at your hardened nipples.

“No? And yet here you are melting at my touch...your body knows me mesh’la, it’s blooming for me and I’ve barely touched you. Sweet girl, don’t you want me to make you feel good? I’ve been thinking about you all day long, about kissing you until you’re breathless...and biting you until you have my mark everywhere. Don’t you want me to show you just how much I’ve missed you?” Din knows he’s not being fair but the way your eyes are glowing with lust is enough to ground him so he could carry out his plan.

“I- I do...fuck, Din- I really do. I barely think of anything else...but I really need to-” You shut your eyes and groan as soon as you feel Din’s hand descend down your chest and rest on your lower stomach. He supports your back as he slowly begins to push against your navel, watching with fascination as your face contorts from pain and pleasure the harder he pushes on your muscles. You’re not sure what’s happening for a few seconds until you manage to open your eyes and look at him. His visor prevents you from seeing what he’s thinking but none of it matters when you feel him shift underneath you before he eases up. You sigh in relief but Din repeats his actions, only this time, he’s becoming a little more aggressive with his touches.

"N-no wait please I-"

"What's the matter mesh'la? You're usually fucking me like a loth-cat in heat by now, begging for me to have my way with you...take what I want until you feel properly fucked and filled with my cum." Din leans forward, never once easing up as he begins to move you over his beskar-clad thigh. There’s not much you can do due to the cuffs and how much advantage Din has over you in terms of muscle and size so you do the only thing that’s left.

You beg.

"Please, please Din I- I just...I need to-" It takes every ounce of control not to let go of your body’s function and you realize you’re not making much sense when Din cuts you off again and asks you what you want.

"Need to what? Go on sweet girl, tell me. What do you need?" His motions become more rough as he alternates between shoving his hand against your bladder and moving your clothed heat across his thigh. Din wants nothing more than to push you to the floor and fuck you until you can’t remember anything but him, but he tries his best to keep himself in check until he gets what he wants.

"I'll do anything Din just...need the- the refresher. I'm so- so...maker, please wait-" The controls dig into your back the more you lay on them but you can’t find it in yourself to care because a different kind of pain shoots down your spine when Din brings you closer to him and hikes your shirt up. His palms are warm against your skin and you hate how good they feel because this was not how you saw the day going with him.

"You know the safeword. Say it if you want me to let you go and I will." His tone shifts and you throw all caution aside as you confess to him why you need to leave.

"Din please...I really need to pee. I- I'll come back right away but I- oh it's too much, t-too much." You think he’s going to apologize and let you go when you tell him but all your admission does is cause him to momentarily stop before he wraps his arms around you and stands up. He’s pushing you up against the wall, not caring for what you just said to him or how rough he’s being as he nudges his leg in between your thighs and resumes his antics from before.

"I know."

The curt response washes over you like ice and your eyes begin to water as soon as Din takes off his helmet and you see him smiling down at you. You don’t know that you’re shaking in his arms but he leans down and nuzzles into the crook of your neck to commit the moment to memory. He loves the effect he’s having on you and although a small part of him feels bad, he doesn’t bother or care to hold back as he brings himself flush against you, the action causing his beskar to push deeper against your navel and have his desired effect.

"Din?" He thinks your whimpers might make him cum right then and there but he takes a deep breath before he pulls away and looks down at you. He’s sure that his eyes don’t convey an ounce of guilt at the moment, the opposite actually, and it only brightens his smile as he pulls down your tank top strap far enough to give him access to the top of your breasts. Din moves closer to you and lays lazy kisses across your heated skin, all the while attempting to grab your attention so he could tell you what he wanted.

"Why do you think I kept handing you water all day ner ka'rta?"

"W-wha-?" Your sniffles pull at his heart but he knows that you’re not in any physical danger and that all you need to do is whisper your safeword and he’d let you go. When a tear drop trails down your chin and hits his forehead, Din has to pull away to take a better look at you. He hates how much he loves the way you’re looking at him right now, like he’s simultaneously a villain and a savior to your predicament.

"And who do you think locked the refresher? Sweet girl… I thought you were smarter than that." Your surprised gasp adds more to the innocence he’s seeing in you and it’s the last straw before he holds onto your waist and begins to move you across his thigh again.

"You what?"

“Go on pretty, I know how much you’re trying to hold it in. ‘m not letting you go any time soon,” Din talks down at you and if you weren’t trying to prevent yourself from embarrassing yourself in front of him, you’d think it was the sexiest tone he’s had with you yet. But it’s getting more difficult to control your bladder and even though you get the sense that he will probably win in the end, you still try to hold off as much as possible.

“Look at you trying so hard...prettiest fucking sight in the galaxy. And do you know what makes it even better? I can smell how much you want me...this tight, wet cunt is begging for my cock. You can have me sweetheart, you can have me right now if you want. But you know what you have to do.” You’re shaking in his arms and plead pathetically when he applies more pressure on your navel. You try to ask him why again but you can’t find the words and resume moaning his name as he uses you.

And that’s what he’s doing. He’s using you. Like he owns you. Like he has the right to control every muscle in your body. You’re not sure what it is that made him act like this all of a sudden and you know it ultimately doesn’t matter because like he said, he won’t be stopping any time soon. It’s just strange that he wants this. He wants you to embarrass yourself. He’s practically helping your body let loose so you could wet yourself. You try to convince yourself that nothing about this should be turning you on, but the way his eyes are hazed with lust and desperation makes you reevaluate your thoughts and you manage to look up at him as he begins to speak again.

“It’s okay mesh’la, you can let go. Let go, now! Make a mess sweetheart. Make a mess of me, I won’t fuck you till you ruin my beskar and make this ship dirty. Go on. Or do you want me to help you again?” Din isn’t sure what’s come over him but he doesn’t hold back anymore, slipping his hand underneath your pants and pushing hard on your bladder until he feels your thighs squeeze around him.

“D-din fuck...oh- my...maker I- I can’t-” You throw your head back as you fist your hands into his cowl, holding on to that last bit of self control before you’re no longer able to. As he lifts his hand and pushes again, the thread breaks and tears slowly roll down your cheeks as you frown up at Din when your bladder gives out. Din looks into your eyes one last time before his attention moves south and his jaw clenches tightly when he notices the material of your pants grow darker the more you relieve yourself.

He doesn’t bother to stop, continuing to apply pressure on your lower stomach as a day’s worth of water floods down your legs and onto his beskar. He watches with fascination as his pants grow wet as well before he hears the faint sound of droplets falling onto his ship. You follow his line of sight and whimper in embarrassment when you notice just how big of a mess you made. There’s a small puddle forming where the two of you are standing and your nervousness only grows when you see how wet Din’s pants are.

When there’s nothing left and your shaking subsides a little, Din removes his hand from you and returns it to your waist, squeezing the skin he has access to so he wouldn’t strip you and fuck you in the middle of your mess. Every time he moves his foot, he can hear the soft splashing sound of the puddle underneath him and it only makes him harder. When he finally looks at you, he’s met with the most vulnerable expression he’s ever seen on you and although he wants nothing more than to kiss you and apologize, he allows himself to go just a little further until he sees you’re no longer able to put up with him.

“D-din...you- you made me, I-”

“Oh sweet girl, I made you do nothing.” The look of shock on your face is worth the hassle and he watches as you pout your lower lip before more tears leave your gorgeous eyes.

“You’re just a filthy girl, wetting yourself in the middle of my ship and not caring how dirty you’ve become...you really couldn’t hold it in cyar’ika? Look at this, look at the mess you made of my armor. You know how valuable beskar is and yet you pissed all over it. And my ship!? Didn’t we just clean this ship pretty?” Din could feel you melting into him with every word that passes through his lips and when you look away from him, his smile falls and he quickly grabs your neck, turning it straightforward so he could look into your eyes.

“No, you don’t get to look away from me when you’ve just pissed all over yourself and me. Maybe I should change your name, call you ad’ika from now on.” He has to hold back from smiling when he sees the moment you recognize the word. He’s only ever used that word whenever he talked with Grogu and you knew exactly why he was bringing it up now. “You’re my little girl aren’t you? My filthy, pretty little ad’ika who can’t fucking control herself and marked me up like she has the right...like she owns me.” Din watches as your expression softens a bit at his last admission and he trails his gaze down your nose until he is only focusing on your lips.

You can’t help but also stare at his lips and Din uses the brief moment of distraction to unbutton your pants and slip his hand into your panties, humming in approval when he feels the wet fabric scratch deliciously at his knuckles. You gasp when you feel his fingers softly rubbing your slit and as you look into his dark brown eyes, Din slips two fingers into your wet cunt and stops.

“Fuck, you’re so wet ad’ika, so warm and wet and ready for me.” He nudges his fingers deeper into he finds the spot that makes you see stars. You know immediately what he wants to do and reach for his arms as he grows closer to you. When they begin to get in the way, Din takes hold of the cuffs and raises them high above your head until the cuffs are glued to the wall. He can’t stop from smiling down at you, all stretched out and ready to be thoroughly fucked. But he doesn’t give in just yet.

“Din it’s...you’ll get dirty. I- I don’t want you to-”

“I don’t fucking care,” he growls as he leans down and bites shoulder again, moaning against your skin when he feels your cunt clench around him. “That’s it, open up for me...let me make you feel good. I- I want you to scream my name sweetheart, scream my name as you make a mess of me. Please...I need it, need- maker...need you to drench me again.” His words twist something inside of you and you lean back as he moves his thick fingers in and out of you until you feel that familiar pressure all over again.

“Oh Din...your fingers f-feel so- so good.”

“That’s right ad’ika, only I get to touch you. Only I get to watch you come undone...only I get to wear your scent, your beautiful fucking wet scent. I- I won’t wash this armor sweet girl, not when you’ve marked it...marked me, this much. Go on, be a good girl and make a mess of me. Let me walk around with the smell of you etched on my fucking beskar.” You whimper at the filthy whispers Din breathes against you and just as you’re about to come, Din grabs your pants along with your damp panties and pushes them as far down as he could. You bite into your lower lip as he tries to push his digits deeper into you, and when you finally manage to turn and look at him, you hold your breath as you see the way he’s looking at you, into you.

“Cum for me. Now.”

The quiet order, along with the pace of his touches, breaks you and you force yourself to not shut your eyes as your pussy throbs around his fingers, a wave of euphoria washing over you so swiftly you think you’ll faint. Din momentarily turns his attention to your heat once again and he hisses when he feels you coming on his hand just as you squirt on his beskar and the floor of the ship. You’re unable to form a coherent sentence as Din refuses to slow down and your eyes water again when the hold he has on your waist becomes more painful than before.

“Maker...you’re perfect.” Din kisses your neck as he finally decides to slow down but the way he continues to rub your clit with his palm does little to calm your nerves and you don’t realize how much you’re shaking until everything quiets down and all that you can hear is the sound of Din’s heavy breathing and your own heaving and sniffling. You wince when he fully removes his hand from you and helps you out of your pants and shoes. He takes a step back and groans when he sees how spent and ruined you look as you stand on your tiptoes and try to calm down.

As you try to catch your breath, Din unlocks both cuffs and throws them aside, reaching down and grabbing your ass so he could support your weight against him. You jump on instinct and moan when you feel the cold beskar against your skin as Din grinds into your soaked heat. He doesn’t waste another moment, diving in and claiming your lips until he could feel your teeth nipping at his tongue. He makes sure he has a good grip on you before he moves to the refresher and as soon as the two of you are standing in front of it, he pushes a code into the pad and unlocks the door. You pull away for a moment to look into his eyes, the silence of your gaze knocking the breath out of him as you hide into his neck. It takes but a second for Din to realize that he shouldn’t try to push your limits any further for the night.

His touches grow softer as he carefully sets you down on the floor of the refresher. Din can see you’re shivering from the cold room and makes quick work of his clothes and armor, choosing to leave his boxer briefs on so you wouldn’t think of anything else. He leans down and taps twice on your shoulders so you could raise them above your head. As you do, you look everywhere else but him and the gesture is a little too raw for Din because as he strips you down to nothing, he’s leaning down and kissing your forehead until he feels you relax in his arms.

When he’s satisfied with your slowing heart rate, he stands up and turns on the water, making sure to stand in front of you and block you from the cold water until it turns warm. Even though he doesn’t particularly enjoy it, he turns the hot water just a little further, knowing how much you preferred it when it struck your skin.

Grabbing the bar of soap you bought from the last hunt, Din sits down and rests his back against the cold metal of the wall before pulling you towards him.

“Come to me mesh’la.” His voice is much more controlled and mellow than minutes before and you melt back into him as soon as his skin comes into contact with yours. You rest your back against his shoulder and sigh heavily when his hands begin to massage your arms. The scent of flowers hits your nostrils in seconds, making you relax even more as the soap washes away any trace of what you and Din had just done.

Din kisses your shoulder and neck as he rubs the soap on your chest and stomach, keeping his touches as appropriate as possible to distract himself from the hardening issue he was struggling with. Although he prefers you all sweaty and dirty, he makes sure to wash every inch of you, knowing that you probably needed to feel clean after...after what he’s done.

He pushes your back until you’re leaning forward far enough for him to wash your back as well. His breath hitches when he sees evidence of his touches on your skin from previous nights. Some of them have turned a light blue color while others were still purple.

Fuck. He didn’t know his grip was this harsh. He was a little guilty for bruising your skin, your lovely, beautiful, gorgeous skin. But the more he saw as he rubbed the soap over your back, the more pride he felt in his chest at the knowledge that he was the only one allowed to mark you.

“D-din…” You moan his name when he pulls you back into his chest and you feel his hands descend lower to wash your thighs. You think that he’s going to touch you where you ache for him but when he focuses on your thighs, you realize that he wasn’t going to go anywhere near your throbbing cunt.

“I’m here sweet girl, let me take care of you.” His whispers are laced with promises and affection and you’re not sure what to make of it. He’s never been this intense, this touch-starved, even this controlling. There’s something about the events of the night that tug at your heart and you wish you could ask him what has changed all of a sudden. But you don’t, instead repeating his words from earlier over and over again as he continues to wash you.

He told you, although indirectly, that you had the right to...to mark him, to own him. He begged you to drench him so everyone would know that he’s yours. That you’re his.

“Din please,” overcome with emotions, you slap the bar of soap away from him and use his surprise to your advantage, quickly turning around and holding onto his broad shoulders as you straddled his thighs.

“Ner ka'rta, we don’t have t-” Din keeps his hands to himself as he feels you rub yourself on his clothed cock. You instantly cut him off, molding your lips with his in a bruising kiss until his arms wrapped around your back. When you knew you had him, you pulled away and laid kisses across his handsome features. He was a moaning mess in no time and when you took hold of his chin and pushed it back, Din felt like he was travelling through the stars, the rough nips you were leaving across the jugular of his neck making him notice just how needy you were.

The hot water cascaded down your back as you assaulted Din’s skin and when you felt him grab your waist and begin to move you across of him, you knew he wasn’t going to deny you from what you wanted. Needed. Craved.

“I need you...now, please Din. I need to feel you inside me.”

“But-”

“Please? Oh maker, I- you said...you said you’d give me your cock if I wanted. And I do. I want you, I want your cock. I- you promised. I- I’ll do anything.” The sound of your desperate pleas sends a shiver down his spine and Din nods frantically just before you pull him out of his briefs.

“You- you’ve done enough for me cyar’ika. So so much. And I- I...oh-” Din throws his head back and shuts his eyes as soon as you lower yourself on his hard cock. He thinks he’s going to cum right then and there, but then you’re moving on top of him and squeezing him so tightly and he realizes that he needed to feel more of you. You cry out his name over and over again as he twitches against your tight walls, and when his eyes snap wide open and look at you, you can’t help but lean forward and bite into his shoulder to keep some semblance of control.

“S-sweet girl...lovely girl, tell me you’re mine.”

The short request causes you to falter in your pace but Din decides to take over again, wrapping his arms around you as he begins to move you on top of him.

“I- I’m yours Din, I’m yours. No one else can fuck me like you, n-no one can kiss me and touch me and take care of me like you...gods, you’re amazing. And you’re mine,” Din groans when he hears the last of your words and he nuzzles into the crook of your neck as you continue to whisper sweet things to him.

“You hear that Din...you’re mine. You- you belong to me, you touch only me...you, oh maker, you fuck only me. This cunt is yours baby and your cock was made for it. Made for me. You l-love only me. Right Din? P-please I’m...already so close. Tell me Din because you know...know that I love you. I love you. No one else. J-just you-”

Din is sure he might be suffocating you with how hard he’s hugging you right now but he doesn’t seem to notice because all he can hear is your declarations of love and commitment. Neither of you have ever come close to being this intimate but his earlier actions apparently unlocked something in the two of you.

You loved him. Even though he could be kinder, and was definitely too broken. You still loved him.

“Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum. P-pfassk...I love you mesh’la. Only you...always you.” Din comes with a cry when he feels your nails digging into his back and he growls as his cock throbs inside you until he’s filled you with his cum. But he doesn’t stop, instead maintaining his pace just to see you fall apart one last time. It’s all too much and not enough, and he’s already oversensitive from coming but he has only himself to blame considering how much he edged himself the entire day. When he hears your gasps turn quieter, he knows you’re close and slithers his hand between your bodies to flick your clit. You moan into his shoulder as you quickly peak one last time, the touch of his fingers reminding you of what he’s done earlier and in a matter of seconds, you’re clenching around him so hard to the point where you’re not sure if you’re experiencing pain or pleasure.

Neither of you say anything as you slowly return to yourselves. When Din moves to try and turn the water off, you accidentally dig your nails deeper into his shoulder and make him hiss.

“S-sorry.” The small apology does something to Din and he decides that he needs to do this now and not when the two of you are in his cot. Twisting his hand into your hair, Din pulls it back until you’re forced to look at him. You stare at each other for what feels like hours before you lean forward and kiss him. It’s much slower and kinder than the earlier kisses and you smile when Din unintentionally thrusts into you. He pulls away and returns your expression when he sees how genuine it is.

“I think I should be the one apologizing ad’ika.”

You know what he’s referring to and you think that perhaps he’s beginning to feel more guilt at what he’s done but you brush it aside with a joke so he knew there was nothing of concern.

“Not sure what you’re talking about Din,” you leave a quick peck on his nose as you rest your cheek on his chest and hug him tightly. He recognizes what you’re doing right away and decides to not fight you, instead maneuvering you off of him to shut the water off. You try to stand but your legs give out immediately. Forutrantly for you, Din is there to catch you and he ignores your complaints as he carries you out of the refresher and into his room. You watch as he brings two towels and proceeds to dry you off, handing you the other one to dry your hair. You giggle when he almost stubs his toe as he comes back with a set of new clothes.

Din ignores your comments when you ask him why he was handing you one of his long sleeve shirts instead of your own, quickly putting on a pair of boxers before throwing the towels back into the refresher. When he comes back, you’re already comfortable and warm in his bed, the sight of you sniffing his pillows causing him to think of a multitude of thoughts. He brushes them all aside when you make room for him and ask him to come to you.

As he slithers underneath the covers, you waste no time and move closer to him until you’re sure you’re touching every inch of his skin.

“Are you okay mesh’la?” Although you know what he’s referring to by that question, you don’t bring up the topic, instead nuzzling into his chest. The sigh of content you hear tells you that he’s not overthinking what happened too much, and it signals for you to do the same because even though you never expected the day’s events, you can’t help but admit to yourself that one thing which you know Din will bring up when the two of you have properly rested.

As strange and sudden as it was, Din’s treatment of you turned you on.

Translations:

Mesh'la - beautiful

Cyar'ika - beloved

Ad'ika - little one

Ner ka'rta - my heart or my soul

Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum - I love you

Some tags aren't working!

Pedro Pascal (and any of his characters):

@pastel-0-princess @feelmyroarrrr @libbymouse @its--fandom--darling @spideysimpossiblegirl @princess76179 @cheekygeek05 @miraclesoflove @purple-mango @freeshavocadoooo @metalarmsandmanbuns @acthenerd @greeneyedblondie44 @cannedsoupsucks @purplepascal042 @talesfromtheguild @f0rever15elf @vibin-hippie @onesmokinbabe @leaiorganas @words-way-of-life @kideyz @lovesickmadsadpoet @niall7inches @rosiefridayrogersunday @tati-adventures @sleep-tight1 @itsfreeekinbats @cybergroupie @marsplsstop @ezrasbirdie @diogodxlot @janebby @juletheghoul @bii-aan-ckaa @nohartandsole @djjarins @lamelyssher @giselatropicana @pescopadral @blackmarketmummy @laviipopii @ew-erin @fan-of-encouragement @melody13522 @clydesducktape @planetariumx @sambucky21 @thirddeadlysin @leannawithacapitala @fangirl-316 @thou-creature-of-the-deep

Din Djarin: @a--1--1--3 @tanzthompson @mrs-ghuleh @caitlynmarty

#din djarin x reader #din djarin/reader #din djarin smut #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian/reader #the mandalorian smut #pedro pascal #din djarin #the mandalorian #mando #mando x reader #mando/reader #humiliation kink #degradation kink #peeing kink #i don't even know what to call it #someone help #pedro Pascal

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ruki--mukami · 2 years

Note

Headcanon of ruki wigh feminine and very soft male s/o? 🥺

Mukami Ruki — “Feminine, Soft” Male S/O Headcanons

💕 At first, Ruki might be a bit caught off guard by your feminine looks. After all, despite being a Vampire living in modern times, he was still raised in an aristocratic family. Gender roles back then were very different than they are today. Men were expected to assume a masculine role and the same goes for women and their femininity.

💕 Despite this obsolete mentality, that doesn’t mean Ruki will dislike your appearance. If anything, over time he grows more and more infatuated with it. It’s what’s on the inside that counts more than anything for him. He’s drawn not only to the blood coursing through your veins, but also your gentle and sweet personality. The way you carry yourself, your words of affirmation, your cute mannerisms, your loving caresses; it all attracts Ruki like an irresistible magnet.

💕 Ruki lives for the flustered, cherry red blush adorning your cheeks. Knowing he’s the reason behind your sudden shyness motivates Ruki to do anything to make you melt in his arms. Expect a lot of physical touch, such as soft caressing or tight hugs that prelude harsh yet passionate bites all along your body to mark his possession. Not only is your embarrassment absolutely adorable, but also it heightens the taste of your blood immensely.

💕 If you have been well-behaved, then Ruki will spoil you with dates both inside and outside the Mukami manor. Whether it’s curled up reading a thought-provoking piece of literature together or going to the local café next to the bookstore, Ruki finds joy in pampering you with completely uninterrupted quality time and his undivided attention. Since he’s rather possessive and gets jealous easily, the bite marks along your neck and shoulders aren’t enough. He has to hold your hand pretty much the whole time both of you are outside to dissuade any potential flirts and show others that you belong to him.

💕 Anyone caught ogling his partner will, without hesitation, suffer Ruki’s wrath. While he’s aware that you attract lots of unwanted attention from others due to your feminine face and slender body, the Vampire will resort to intimidation to ward off what he considers “competition.” He instantly becomes ten times more protective than he was before knowing full well that your effeminate looks

💕 The Master/Livestock dynamic still persists, albeit playfully and mostly behind closed doors. Nevertheless, Ruki expects you to never leave his side and stay close to him at all times, especially in public. Otherwise, a punishment is in order for potentially trying to appeal to strangers. Yes, he's strict as ever, even with a soft significant other.

💕 Even so, beneath the strict and sometimes cold demeanor is a Vampire who finds solace in your arms or in your kisses. Sometimes a simple confession of love might be all he needs to snap back to his senses. While he won't admit it so easily, Ruki appreciates honest and straightforward affection from you.

💕 Since stroking Ruki’s hair relaxes him, so much so that he could even fall asleep from the soothing sensation, he will return the same treatment to his lover. Don’t be fooled, though. This Vampire still thirsts for blood, even when drowsy from the feeling of your fingers threaded in his dark curls. Ruki would linger gentle love bites along your skin as you both cuddle in each other’s arms, usually in bed or perhaps on the couch after reading a book or completing a jigsaw puzzle.

💕 "You’re more than just my prey or mere livestock now. It’s not only your blood or your body that I want, but also your heart. All of your love, your devotion, your everything. You’re my possession. Heh, it's adorable how red your cheeks have gotten. Don't show this face to anyone else."

(( You may or may not have noticed, but currently what you just described sounds a lot like one of my ongoing interactions. Ruki and Lukas, or Rukas as their ship name is called. Just wanted to mention a lot of my ideas come from their ship, and honestly if you want a better idea of how he'd act with this kind of S/O, then I highly suggest you read the Rukas threads. They're not significant others yet but still. 😩😩😩 ))

#diabolik lovers #ruki mukami #mukami ruki #diabolik lovers headcanons #ruki mukami headcanons #mukami ruki headcanons #ask

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colossal-fallout · 3 years

Text

[ Classified ]

The full report - Eren Yeager

The following report details all information on Eren Yeager. Contains NSFW content and reader must be over the age of 18 to view this document.

For your eyes only.

Name: Eren Yeager

Birthplace: Shiganshina

Height: 180cm / 5ft 9"

General

[ A1 ]

Appearance & Hygiene practices:

Eren's chestnut brown hair is always clean and fresh. Whenever he pays you a late night visit, he'll have most probably just gotten out of the shower. Coconut scented shampoo of sorts? Whatever it is, it smells so good.

Prefers showers over a bathe. He says it's to save time, but he spends a good 40 - 60 minutes in there, easily.

Once he's dry, likes to throw on jogger bottoms and a hoodie over his bare skin. His bare skin that is now so soft and scented as his favourite shower gel which is either tea-tree oil or Coconut.

If he wants to remain clean shaven, Eren must shave every 2-3 days. Sometimes he likes to grow it out but nothing ever past a long stubble.

Minimal body hair.

Trims the hairs on his pubic bone/lower stomach. Has pleasuring you in mind as he does so. Will take into consideration the friction against you.

Totally clean shaven testicles.

Eren's nails are short but that's because he bites them. [ see section A3 ]

Beautiful set of teeth. Brushes twice daily in a modern AU.

Eren adores it when you brush his hair for him. He finds it extremely relaxing as you massage his scalp. His eyes will close and a small, barely audible hum will emit from time to time.

Eren's skin care routine is pretty basic. All of the steam from sitting in his hot, frequent showers for so long seems to do him wonders - his skin is flawless and worthy of envy.

Due to the healing power of being a Titan shifter, Eren has no scars.

Eren has quite large hands with long fingers. He doesn't wear rings or jewellery as it reminds him of the burden of when he had to keep that damn key on him at all times. Will however, put up with a wedding ring.

[A2]

Body & Love language:

Eren is a pretty introverted person. His hands are usually tucked away inside of his pockets - be it either trousers or hoody/jacket.

He hunches a little too. Likes to feel hidden. He's had enough attention over the years and wants nothing more than to just shrink away in a crowded room. Or maybe, it's the weight of the world on his shoulders.

Brooding, moody exterior. Extreme "resting bitch face"

Shrugs a lot. At first glance, you'd think he was a moody teenager trapped in a grown man's body.

Likes to sit with his feet flat up on the chair with his knees splayed - you'll usually find him like this with an arm resting over a knee while the other is at a 90 degree angle pointing away from his hip.

Fumbles his hands together in formal occasions when he can't sit so casually or tuck them away.

Likes to drape his arm over you without touching you. His arm will rest above you on the top of the chair. A clear indication of "They're mine" and "I will keep you safe"

His hips will usually be swivelled in your direction, regardless of where you are in the room. A subconscious body language of sexual yearning.

Eren likes to hold hands with you when you're walking. He's not huge on PDA but likes the strong yet subtle showings that you're together.

Tends to rub his thumb over the back of your hand absent-mindedly when you do so.

His love languages include physical touch. Can get very needy and touch starved pretty easily. Not in a overbearing way, but even just a run of his slender fingers through your hair is enough to keep him going until the two of you are in a more private setting.

[A3]

Bad Habits & Tendencies:

As mentioned above, Eren bites his finger nails. His toe nails too. It's pretty gross to be honest.

He never does it in public, but he has been known to do it in front of you when he feels comfortable enough to do so.

Get's very fidgety when irritated or annoyed, which is pretty often. Especially if Jean is around.

Short temper. He's learned to tame it more over the years where he doesn't show it so easily. But everyone has their limit and when his is reached, his yell is booming and pretty intimidating.

During an argument with you he has been known to raise his voice, but it's not the frightening roar you've heard him unleash on others before.

Always apologises to you after he's calmed down. Even though it wasn't that bad.

If you two ever have a bad falling out, will lock himself away for days. He'll be pissed at himself for letting it get so bad and depressed that you two are having such problems. But he'll do anything he can to fix it.

[ A4 ]

Common misconceptions:

Obviously everyone has their own cannons and opinions. But I don't personally see Eren as being an abusive partner. Yeah, he has his problems and treats his friends like shit but there's a reason for that we'll probably see in the last chapter. If you're worthy enough to pierce that cold and distant shell, you're a very special person and he'll treat you as such.

Eren actually has a large heart hidden under that huge chip on his shoulder. He cares and loves the people around him unconditionally. Even to the point of carrying out mass genocide to protect them.

Still... He does have a dark side to be weary of at times.

Even though he's gross while in Liberio, usually Eren is actually pretty clean.

[ A5 ]

Food & Drink:

In a Modern AU Eren loves fancy coffees with the weird names. The longer to pronounce, the better. He just likes the fact they give him energy and the fancier ones taste good.

Due to not having meat for so long, a good ol' fashioned beef/lamb stew is his favourite.

Doesn't drink in canon.

Modern AU, his alcoholic beverage of choice is bottles of beer and craft ales. Sometimes is a sucker for red wine.

[ A6 ]

Modern Au:

Eren wears loose clothing. Hoodies, loose jeans, those baggy cardigans too.

His texting style is spam over one long message. Especially if he's pissed off. He's too impatient to sit and type in paragraphs.

Drives a black car. Don't ask me what type, I don't know cars. But it's black, 'kay?

It also has "black ice" air freshener inside.

Likes to ride quads and mopeds along fields. He's a thrill seeker. Rollercoasters, bungee jumping... you name it he's game.

Eren plays the guitar. He took lessons for it but after about a year he just went his own way and self-taught.

If he sees a guitar at a party, he will pick it up and play it. He won't sing though.

He actually hates singing. He finds it embarrassing.

Always has in his air pods/earphones.

Likes any sort of music that is catchy.

Probably streams on Twitch. He won't talk much though.

Could have a wide range of jobs. Coffee shop, could be in college, might be a ride attendant... who knows? It's anyone's guess what Eren is doing. He doesn't talk about himself that much.

Romance & NSFW

[ B1 ]

Crush:

Eren would definitely be in denial he has a crush on you at first.

• “Does y/n seem different to you?”

Armin; “No…? In what way?”

“I dunno… Just, different.”

• His poor stubborn brain would be ticking for weeks as to why he suddenly wants to be near you a lot more often and has urges to touch you, even if it’s just a slight brush against your arm.

• Will find any excuse to do extra training with you

• Once he FINALLY clicks on as to why he’s had these feelings, he’ll be pretty knocked off his feet and a little annoyed at himself.

I’m here to kill the enemy...

• Still though… Can’t seem to keep himself away.

[ B2 ]

First kiss & general kisses:

After the initial denial and keeping himself away, he'll just decide one day he's had enough of feeling this way and decides to to something about it.

He won't shove himself onto you. He'll do some sly probing to see if there is any indication of reciprocation.

Knowing Eren, he'll indirectly piss you off or insult you. He didn't mean to. He's just lacking social skills. Man aint smooth.

You'll slap him, probably, where he'll keep his head away from you for a few seconds, realising he's pushed you too far. Whichever side you palmed him away, he'll stay.

He'll slowly return his gaze to yours before gently holding your arms, apologising and planting his lips onto yours.

His general kisses are quite firm and forceful. Not in an aggressive way, but a "god I want you so bad" way.

Always either slides his arms around your waist or cups your face/head.

He tastes like sweetened tea <3 / Coffee in a Modern AU

Loves coming from behind and snaking his arms around you, nuzzling into your neck when you're doing something. Doesn't like it when your attention is away from him for too long.

When he's feeling soft and tender, will dance his nose with yours and catching your mouth in a caress.

When he's super turned on, he'll suck your tongue, bite your bottom lip and kiss anywhere he can.

[ B3 ]

Sex:

Ha ~~!

Eren is up there with the best when it comes to sex. He knows what he's doing and he does it well.

Extremely skilled with his fingers and tongue. He'll have you crawling the walls with hysteria as he likes to tease you throughout the day. He more than makes up for it, though.

Gropes, nips, kisses, licks, bites, flicks... anywhere and everywhere he can.

Is the most vocal when you perform oral sex on him. Will groan so deeply, his entire body will vibrate.

Dirty talk is this man's second language.

"Look how desperate you are for me." / "Look how desperate for you you've gotten me..."

"Do I feel good like this?"

"Am I making you feel good baby?"

"You're so good at that. Fuck, such a good girl/boy"

"S'so fuckin' tight."

"You're my little fuck thing, aren't you?"

"You're perfect."

"I love you..."

Are some of the many things you'll hear while he's fucking you.

He doesn't really have a favourite position. He'll gladly take you anyway he can. If he's in a rough mood, he'll bend you over the sofa, take you up against the wall... But if he's feeling more soft he'll make slow, passionate love to you for hours.

He does have a strong soft side at times.

Dominic Dominant. He loves seeing you totally at his mercy, the power over you the most arousing thing in the world to him.

Big daddy dilf vibes. He knows what he’s doing and he’s fucking good at it too.

The only time he’ll sub is if he wants to be lazy - letting you ride him and use him to your heart’s content.

Dirty talk. It can get pretty degrading at times. If you’re not into that, he respects that boundary.

Will absolutely ruin you.

Low-key loves it when you claw his back in hysteria. He thrives knowing he can send you absolutely insane, and he can just heal the claw marks in a matter of seconds. Sometimes even during sex (which is the hottest thing ever)

In an AU modern, he would love to fuck you near a large mirror or record you both getting at it to watch at a later date.

A lot of hissing, humming and low groaning, especially when he’s close to unloading.

Likes to watch you masturbate, putting his head close and observing intently. Loses his shit if you moan his name while doing so.

Hair pulling is his overload language. Will tug fistfuls when he gets too turned on.

[ B4 ]

Kinks:

The risk of getting caught. He likes having risky sex in semi public locations. Makes a game of how loud he can get you to moan, knowing someone would probably hear you.

Light Degradation. When he’s in a rough mood, he doesn’t mind calling you a few names. Nothing too extreme. And if it’s not your thing, he’ll respect that boundary.

Loves a good ol’ 69. Having you on his face with your ass in view is just… *Chef’s kiss*

Speaking of ass, he loves to bend you over too, allowing himself in nice and deep with a great view and something Juicy to grab.

[ B5 ]

Aftercare:

Aftercare with Eren isn’t anything special unfortunately. He’s another who gets sleepy after sex.

Won’t ignore you though. Often lazy pillow talk is on the cards and telling you how much you mean to him and how beautiful you are.

Will run his fingers across your scalp to soothe you.

Also will kiss any bite marks or finger bruises he’s left behind and ask if you’re okay.

Relationship with loved ones & becoming serious

[ C1 ]

Friends & Family:

When Eren meet's your friends family he will be polite yet quiet. He wants them to like him but he won't pine for their approval. If they like him, awesome. If they don't...? No big deal.

Same goes with your friends. He'll stay quiet until spoken to at first, but once he's been eased into conversation, he'll flow with it a lot easier.

Again, he'll be polite but don't expect him to kiss ass, because he certainly wont.

[ C2 ]

Marriage:

You couldn’t actually believe Eren had proposed. Although he was down on one knee in front of your very eyes, your mind just wasn’t accepting it. Folks and onlookers watched with bated breath, awaiting your answer. He sure kept this surprise hidden well…

Of course, you said yes and he picked you up by your waist in a spin, colliding his lips to yours.

And now here he was, watching you walk down the aisle, a lump in his throat and his heart racing.

You looked gorgeous, like something from a fairy tale.

And of course, he looked as handsome as ever. His suit was smart and his hair was up in its usual bun.

Armin is his best man, of course; who is standing and beaming with pride.

Eren holds back his chokes and tears as he reads his vows;

“Y/N… From the first time I ever laid eyes on you, all those years ago, I knew you would be in my life forever. Back then, I didn’t think it would be as my wife, but God I am so glad it is. I’m sorry for my stubbornness and irrational behaviour when we were young. But despite that you still loved, and stood by me and for that I’ll be eternally grateful. I vow to always stand beside you, whatever the world throws at us. I vow to hold you when you need support. I vow to remember how you always had my back no matter what. And I vow to always love you, with my heart and soul, until the day I die and after.”

The room erupts in cheers and tears when you seal your kiss.

The reception is wild.

Everyone is drunk (except Levi) and dancing. Reiner and Connie are dancing like weirdos, Reiner's blazer removed and at one point Connie is on his shoulders.

Sasha has too much to drink and is spewing in the bathroom.

Mikasa can’t stop crying with happiness and pride.

He carries you to your room afterwards where you spend all night sealing a special bond that will never be broken.

[ C3 ]

Children:

Eren has a soft spot for children, believe it or not. As seen before the expedition to the forest of giant trees. He sees his old self behind the innocent glint of unaltered admiration within a child's eyes.

He's not super into child play though. He wont pull weird voices or funny faces. He'll sit at their level and speak to them like they were anyone else. Obviously, watching what he says around them.

If they're unchecked and acting themselves, he'll become quickly annoyed as they wreck havoc around him and will have to leave the room or he'll get too agitated.

If his s/o discovers they're pregnant he'll seem to take it well. But inside he's falling apart and freaking out. He won't ever show it to them, but he doesn't know how he could be a father. Would he be like his own? Would he be able to be a good figure to look up to? What if he fails? Is it selfish to bring a child into this cruel world?

He'll be shocked but understandably so. After after a couple of weeks of self-reflection and brooding, he'll start to feel better about the whole thing.

More protective over his s/o than usual. Will make sure they're eating, drinking, resting and god help you if he finds you doing something you shouldn't such as trying to lift something heavy.

Will hold your hair and rub you back, as well as bring you water while you're having your morning sickness.

"Babe? It's four in the afternoon. How come you're still sick?"

"Eren, it's called morning sickness but it can happen any time."

He'll click his tongue. "....That's a dumb name, then."

The first time he feels the baby kick within you, his heart absolutely melts. His eyes enlarge and you could swear you saw them soften with that spark behind his emerald greens he had when you were younger.

His large palm is warm against your stomach as he feels around, the little flutter of your child hitting against his skin making him flinch in surprise at first.

"Woah..." He'll gasp in amazement. "They're already so strong. Hey, y/n? Doesn't that hurt?"

"Sometimes." You'll laugh softly.

He'll gingerly place his face to your skin, a little embarrassed he's doing this; but he feels the need. "...Don't hurt your mom, okay?"

As your pregnancy progresses and you get larger, he will not leave your side. If he has to, he'll be worrying and you'll be occupying his mind. In a modern au, he'll constantly call and text and will get Mikasa or Armin to check in on you often.

Will be so gentle during love making. He's terrified he'll hurt the baby.

One of the only times you've seen Eren panic in his adult life is when your waters break.

You'd gotten up in the middle of the night to pee. Climbed back into bed and felt a strange pressure, followed by a pop. Then a warm gushing sensation. You wait a few seconds to settle your own panic before you nudge Eren awake.

"Eren..."

He'll bolt up, confused. "What? Are you okay? Is the baby okay?"

"Eren, my waters have broken."

"Shit. Okay. Shit. What do we do? Shit." He'll leap out of bed and throw the lights on. You get to your feet where more water will start to drop onto the floor. "Shit, shit. I'll get the bag. Do you need help getting dressed? Okay, where's my jacket? WHERE'S MY JACKET?!"

"Eren, honey I need to you calm down."

"Okay, sorry. I'm calm. Shit. Shit..."

Will hold your hand with a worried look the entire time you're in labour. Has water and snacks on hand.

Will watch in amazement as your child is pushed into the world. This magical moment changes something in him, but right now he's not sure what that is.

They will bond immediately. As soon as he holds your son/daughter he can't take his wide gaze off them.

They're inseparable.

Any doubts of being a bad father is washed away as he takes them under his wing and teaches them about the world.

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sugarmaplewings-fics · 3 years

Text

Kirishima Cuddle Headcanons

Paring: Kirishima x reader

Warnings: Intense snuggle-ry, physically affectionate Kirishima (and reader), very very mildly suggestive in some parts

Author's Note:

So . . . it's been a year. Wow. I'm writing this for my one-year anniversary with Kirishima (or at least, it's been a year since I started writing my first oneshot about him :3)

I can't believe I haven't done this yet (the answer is because I'm a coward), so . . . here you go: Me self-projecting onto Eijirou, as usual.

🎉 Kirishima Cuddle/Nap headcanons! 🎉 (Because I'm depressed, touch starved, chronically sleepy, and sometimes a body pillow just doesn't cut it, chief (don't get me wrong, I love my $90 daki))

Enjoy my simpery, fellow simps!

-Sugar

『° 。✰˚⋆☾⋆。✰°』

● This goes without saying, but Eijirou loves cuddling you :]

● Literally, for any reason, he wants to hold you and have you close. That's just how he is you can't change my mind >:(

● It's a great way to spend time with you, and it's one of his favorite things to do after a date, when he's bored, or if he's comforting you (or wants comfort from you)

● He feels like it's easier to talk when you're snuggled up against his chest, and he hopes you feel the same

● He loves to give you kisses all over your face if he can, just lazily pressing his lips to your skin

● For this reason, his favorite position is forking. Just having your chest up against his and your legs intertwined and being able to see your cute face means everything to him

● That's not to say he doesn't also love spooning! He likes to be the big spoon because he feels super manly and like he can protect you from anything, but he also is okay with being the little spoon. It's something everyone needs from time to time

● And he likes having you lay your head on his chest :]

● For real though, any kind of snuggling goes. As long as he's touching you, he's happy

● Holding 👏 your 👏 hand 👏 while 👏 snuggling

● He lives for that shit, man

● Just letting you play with his fingers while you're in his arms

● 😞👌

● Actual heaven

● If his hands aren't occupied, however, he's busy touching you pretty much everywhere else

● (As long as you're okay with it)

● It doesn't have to be sexual, he just wants to be able to feel you

● Might put his hands up your shirt tho

● He especially loves squeezing any squishy parts of your body. No insecurity is going to deter him; mans is more comfortable with your body than you are

● Speaking of, he's big on skinship

● He wants you as close up against him as possible, and there's just something about feeling your skin against his that makes it all that much better

● He probably isn't wearing a shirt anyways, just saying 😳

● 10/10 his favorite way to fluster you

● He tries his best to make sure he's clean and smells okay before getting in bed with you

● Aaand maybe sometimes he overdoes it with the Old Spice

● His hair is almost always down when he cuddles with you. He doesn't want gel getting on his pillow

● Also his hair is probably dry and crunchy as hell with how much dye and gel he puts in it but we can ignore that

● Pls play with his hair anyway

● Switching gears a bit, he will cuddle you in public

● Usually nothing too extreme, as long as you're cool with it, but he still likes to put an arm around you wherever you happen to be

● He'll also sit you on his lap in the common room on the couch. He doesn't really care if anyone sees you, he's just proud to show you off as his

● He also doesn't care if his friends make any comments about how cute the two of you are, or if they say you should get a room. He laughs them off every time and just pulls you in even closer

● But he gets it if you're not into that. He prefers to save the more serious snuggles for private anyway. They feel more special

● Kirishima would take naps with you from time to time. Sometimes it just kind of happens and you end up falling asleep tangled up in each other

● He's so warm, you probably don't even really need a blanket. His big heart heats his entire body, essentially turning him into a human furnace

● Also he's just totally relaxing to be with? He'll rub your back while he talks with you in low tones, and the whole experience is just really nice. He'll play with your hair a little too, if he can

● And if your head's on his chest, you can hear his heartbeat. Listening to your heartbeat and letting you listen to his is a special type of intimacy Eijirou loves to indulge in

● Have I mentioned how much he likes to kiss you? I'll say it again because it's important. He's dropping in kisses to your nose, hair, forehead, and cheeks constantly. He just can't restrain himself when it comes to you

● He might start a little tickle fight with you (which is super unfair because he can harden his skin >:( ), and he also might blow raspberries on your shoulder or tummy. He's a goof, pfft

● He's also a big fan of noseys (nuzzling his nose with yours)!

● And he's a fan of letting you wear his shirts and hoodies! It makes the cuddles feel extra special to him

● Seriously, Kirishima's going to fulfill your snuggle needs and then some. You're no longer allowed to be touch starved when you're his partner :)

『° 。✰˚⋆☾⋆。✰°』

Taglist: @aahilovetheatre @basicalyrandom @bumbyslair @hyunmin-1404 @kqtsukii @nabo39 @pyrofanatic @rainy-skys-and-bright-stars @sendhelpimstupid @ure-a-sunflower @xoxopam4

#eijirou kirishima #kirishima eijirou #kirishima bnha #kirishima fluff #kirishima imagine #kirishima headcanons #kirishima x reader #eijirou kirishima x reader #kirishima eijirou x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #reader insert #sugar hcs

182 notes · View notes

nashibirne · 3 years

Text

Gimme Shelter - 3

Chapter 3 anyone? Well...here it comes. I hope you enjoy it. If so, please leave me a comment, like or replog. 💜

Previous part -> Nashi’s Masterlist

Pairing: Henry Cavill x OFC (Kat Spencer)

Words: ~3.1k

Summary: Henry has to deal with a personal crisis and he finds shelter with his old rugby mate Sam and his sister Kat. She used to be Henry’s best friend a very long time ago. Will they be able to become friends again or maybe even more? Chapter 3: Henry tries to get closer to Kat but there are various obstacles.

Warnings: RPF, mention of mental health issues and panic attacks, language

No beta! All mistakes are mine. English is not my mother tongue so expect bad grammar and wrong spelling.

Disclaimer: I don’t know the real Henry Cavill, this is pure fiction and nothing more

Credits: Pics for the moodboard from Pinterest. Face claims: Kat = Jennifer Connelly, Eli = Stephen James

Taglist (please let me know if you want to be added or removed)

@lunedelorient @inlovewithhisblueeyes @willkatfanfromasia @hell1129-blog @mis-lil-red @agniavateira @kebabgirl67 @omgkatinka @legendarywizarddetective @summersong69 @taebfada @xxxkatxo @madbaddic7ed @artandotherdelights @sweetlybigdragonn @notabronte @littlefreya @luclittlepond @eldarwen333 @meowpurrbooks @marantha @rn7rocks

~~~~~~~~

I should've known better than to cheat a friend

And waste the chance that I'd been given

So I'm never gonna dance again

The way I danced with you, ohh

Never without your love

From Careless Whisper written by Andrew J. Ridgeley / George Michael

Henry was wrong thinking their conversation was the end of Kat's distant behaviour. Sure, it got better but she was still acting aloof and it was clear as day that she still couldn't see him as a friend. She treated him like a guest. Always polite and friendly but keeping her distance and neutrality. And that was the reason why he was really looking forward to tonight. It was Saturday and they were going to visit the city festival that took place every summer and that was a big event in the little town of St. Ives. Henry, Kat and Sam with his girlfriend Lydia, who was a delicate and very pretty black woman with an astonishing amount of energy, always in a good mood and wearing her heart on her sleeve. Henry immediately got why Kat liked her so much, when he met her for the first time a day after he moved in. She was funny and very smart, a real tough cookie but caring and warm-hearted, too. So it was going to be just the four of them and of course he was hoping for a chance to come a little closer to Kat in the relaxed atmosphere of the public party with some music and drinks. Maybe she was able to loosen up around him there.

When they arrived the festival was in full swing. The city was crowded with tourists and locals, smiling faces everywhere and the friends were in a good mood, too. Sam and Lydia were standing arm in arm and Kat was sure her brother had finally found his perfect match. She'd never seen him so in love before and she was genuinely happy for him. Henry went to a stall and came back with four glasses of beer, after he had taken a few selfies with some fangirls. Kat was wondering how he felt about this. About the fact that he got recognized although he was in St. Ives to escape all the media hype and all the pressure that it had put on him in the last years but he didn't seem to care. Maybe he's so used to it that it doesn't bother him, Kat thought, or he's just not showing it. "Cheers." Henry said, smiling at them, holding Kat's gaze a little longer than usual which made her nervous. "Cheers." They answered in unison and Kat started to look around. There were various stalls selling all kinds of stuff, from kitsch to unique art and she even spotted some carousels. The band that had been playing was just leaving the stage right in front of the harbour.

"Isn't that Elijah?" Sam nudged her and nodded at a stall a few meters away.

"Who?" Lydia craned her neck to take a look. "The inked guy?"

"Shit. Yes, that's him." Kat made a face and Henry turned around. There was only one inked guy. He was tall and buff, tattooed from head to toe - literally. He was young, 24 or 25 maybe, and very handsome, Henry had to admit that. Piercing blue eyes, a sharp jawline and high cheekbones, his black hair worn in a stylish undercut, dressed in ripped jeans and a simple white T-shirt.

"This is your fuck boy?" Lydia blurted out. Kat shushed her with an awkward grin. "He was my fuck boy. Past tense."

Henry felt his stomach twist in a strange mix of jealousy, anger and protectiveness.

"Damn, girl. You never mentioned he is that hot. I see why you didn't say no to him."

"Excuse me?" Sam looked at his girlfriend with a frown. "You don't even like tattoos?" Lydia laughed out loud and kissed him. "You're right, baby, he's gross."

"There he comes." Henry said looking at Kat who rolled her eyes.

"Heaven help." She muttered under her breath.

"Kat, good to see you." Ink guy hugged her before he eyed her up and down. "You look great."

"Hi. Thanks. You look good too." She smiled at him and there was an awkward pause until she cleared her throat to introduce him.

"Um, yeah, you know my brother Sam and this is his girlfriend Lydia." She pointed at them. "And here we have our new housemate Henry." She nodded at him and Henry flinched. Housemate. Not friend, just housemate.

"Guys, this is Elijah. We used to do Yoga together."

Elijah glanced at her before he put on a lewd smirk. "Yeah, let's call it Yoga." He raised his eyebrows and gave Kat a sexy wink.

"Speaking of which. I really miss our long and intense...Yoga exercises." He grinned. "I think about you a lot to get into the right mood, whenever I do Yoga...all alone. On my own. Almost every night."

Kat raised an eyebrow and returned his flirtatious smile. "I'm sure you don't have problems finding a new Yoga partner."

"No, I don't. I've tried it with a few. But it's hard to find someone as good as you. As flexible and experienced and passionate...about Yoga."

Kat was speechless for a moment and Elijah stepped closer and whispered loud enough for everyone to hear. "Maybe we can do a session tonight."

Kat looked him in the eyes, biting her bottom lip. "Yeah. Maybe. If I'm in the mood for Yoga later."

He grinned. "See you on the dance floor? The DJ's gonna start his show in a few."

"Sure." Kat nodded.

"Great. See ya, guys." He waved at them and strolled away with a swagger that annoyed Henry.

When he was out of earshot Sam laughed out loud.

"Fuck, sis. Did the guy just tell you, you're his wank-rag?"

Kat knitted her brows with an embarrassed grin. "Shut up, okay? I don't wanna hear anything about this. This conversation never happened." She blushed furiously and Henry would have loved to ask her about the story behind all this but he kept his mouth shut. It was none of his business. He was just the housemate.

*****

It took Henry another four glasses of beer to find the courage to ask her about Mr. Ink anyway.

"So what's going on with you and...Elijah?" Henry faked nonchalance by giving her just a quick glance and a tiny smile.

"Nothing." Kat didn't even look at him. Instead she watched the dancing crowd in front of the stage.

"I see." Henry tried to shrug it off and took another sip of his beer. He knew he shouldn't drink so much but it helped him to loosen up.

"Do you really think it's good for you to drink so much when you're still on your meds?"

Henry wasn't surprised by her question. She had always taken care of him. She had always been his voice of reason.

"No. Actually I know it's a very bad idea."

"But you do it anyway. Some things never change." Kat turned to him, took his glass out of his hands and replaced it with her glass of coke. He accepted it with a lopsided grin and the look they shared when their hands touched for a second made his heart flutter.

"I had a fling with him last year." Kat finally explained. "We went to the same Yoga class and we started to...well...have sex. It only lasted a two months."

"Why did it end?"

"It got a little out of hand. Eli wanted more than booty calls but I didn't. I just wanted casual fucks…"

Henry looked at her with a frown. Of course she misinterpreted his expression.

"Don't you dare judge me, Cavill…" Her voice was tense.

"I don't judge you, Kat. Casual sex can be great, I know that. I'm just surprised. I mean, you used to be the romantic type…"

"Romance is dead, Henry." She tried to temper her words with a smile but he knew that look that crossed her eyes. A mixture of defiance and sadness, that indicated a topic that worried her though she wouldn't want to talk about it. "Kat…." He touched her arm and she flinched as if his hand was burning her. Kat gave Henry an apologetic smile. Shaking her head she took his hand and gave it a quick squeeze. "I'm fine." The way he looked at her -his head cocked, his gaze intense- made her skin tingle and so she quickly averted her eyes.

She constantly had to remind herself of their conversation a few days ago. She was willing to give it a try, to be friends with him again but she just wasn't able to shake off the past. And the mixed emotions she had just thinking about him weren't helpful as well. She was attracted to him more than she wanted to be and at the same time she couldn't stand being too close to him. Henry opened his mouth to say something but before he was able to do so Lydia took Kat by the hand and dragged her away. "Come on, Kat. Let's dance. I love this song."

Elijah found Kat on the dance floor after just five minutes. She seemed to be hesitant at first about dancing with him but after another five minutes she had given in and now Henry was watching them getting closer with every song, moving to the rhythm, Elijah was holding her very close, rubbing his body against hers and it looked pretty hot.

"The guy's got moves, huh?" Sam nudged Henry with a grin.

"Yeah." He couldn't help but roll his eyes.

"If you're so annoyed by him, why don't you do something about it?"

Henry looked at him with a frown. "What do you mean?"

"I mean you can go on watching them dry humping on the dancefloor with hungry eyes or you can go dance with Kat yourself."

Henry let out a snort.

"I don't think your sister wants to dance with me."

"You'll never know if you don't try."

Henry just grunted and tried to shrug it off but Sam didn't want to let him off the hook.

"Just go and dance with her."

"I don't know."

"Oh come on, Cavill. Don't be such a sissy."

"Where's the point, Sam. She hates me."

Sam shook his head. "She doesn't hate you."

"But she doesn't like me either." Henry wasn't convinced.

"She likes you more than she dislikes you." Sam replied cryptically. "Now, come on. Go and put this prick in his place." Sam took Henry's glass and gave him a little shove. "Go." Henry stumbled forward. "Go." Sam repeated. Henry rolled his eyes. "Fine. She thinks I'm an idiot anyway. Not a problem if I make a fool of myself."

Henry made his way through the dancing crowd and when he finally stood right beside them Kat noticed him with a surprised smile. She stopped moving and Elijah gave him an angry glance. "Sorry, but I have to cut in."

"You do?" Kat asked sarcastically. "I do. Sorry, mate." He took Kat's hand and pulled her away from Elijah.

"Fancy a dance?" He indicated a bow and gave her a wink.

Kat grinned and gave Eli an apologetic shrug before turning to Henry again.

"Why not. Show me your moves."

And so they danced. Not as sexy and close as she had danced with Mr. Ink but still. She seemed to be happy and enjoying his company and that was all Henry was asking for. He wasn't the best dancer but it felt okay after the first awkward moments and Kat even touched him from time to time. After the third uptempo song the DJ played a slow track and he pulled Kat closer. She hesitated for a brief moment but then she wrapped her arms around his neck and he held her by her waist. They swayed to the slow music, their bodies not touching but their eyes met and Henry was wondering if Kat's heart was racing as fast as his.

Kat's heart was indeed racing. So many years ago this had been all she'd ever wished for. To dance with him to a romantic song. To feel his hands on her body. To be close to him. But those teenage dreams belonged to the past. She didn't believe in the idea of everlasting love anymore. She had given up on waiting for 'the one' a long time ago. And even if she had this tiny spark of hope for finding true love remaining in the darkest corners of her mind, it couldn't be Henry, could it? Her heart and mind screamed no. No, woman, he broke your heart. Don't get too close to him. You're going to burn your fingers. Again. He's not the one for you. But her body said yes. Go for it, woman. You're attracted to him. You've yearned for him 22 years, now get what you're craving.

Kat started to panic when Henry's gaze got more and more intense. She felt like drowning in his ocean blue eyes and burning up in his body heat at the same time. She knew that warm, fluttery feeling in her belly that was caused by his smile and his touch too well and she wouldn't let this happen again. He might have tricked her once but she wouldn't let him trick her twice. No fucking way.

Kat let go of his neck and took a step back and he knew their dance was over. Elijah gladly took over again and all Henry could do was to quit the field.

****

When Kat came home the next morning she found Sam in the kitchen making scrambled eggs and bacon.

"Morning. That smells heavenly."

"Morning. Will be done in a minute if you want some."

"I'd love to. I'm starving."

Sam turned around with a smirk.

"Really? No morning-after-breakfast at Elijah's?"

Kat rolled her eyes. "I didn't want to stay any longer, it just makes things awkward."

"I see. Is this going to be a regular thing again? You and your toyboy?"

"No." Kat shook her head. "Definitely not. Where are Lydia and Henry?"

"Lydia has a bad hangover and Henry….well, I guess he's still asleep. He didn't feel well last night." Sam turned around and gave his sister a plate filled with eggs, bacon and a bagel. Kat looked at him with a frown. "How's that? He was fine when I left. Did he drink too much?"

"No, no, he just had water after you scolded him for drinking." Sam winked at her with a grin. Getting serious he sat down and looked at her. "He had some kind of panic attack. Just freaked out…"

"God, Sam. That's awful. What happened?" Kat looked at her brother with a stunned expression on her face.

"I don't really know. It began with some people that recognized him. He took photos with them, it didn't seem to be a problem but then more and more fans came and surrounded him and he did his best to be nice and fulfill all their requests, he signed shirts and took selfies, one girl wanted his signature on her bra, it was crazy and soon got out of hand. I could see the panic in his eyes although he did his best to hide it. He was so polite and kind although a drunk guy, I guess the boyfriend of one of his fans, started to insult him. But at some point his face turned so pale and his hands started to shake, I was afraid he was about to pass out."

"Oh my god." Kat was really worried, Sam could easily tell by the deep frown and the knitted brows. "What did you do?"

"I got him out of there. Lydia calmed down the remaining fans and told them he had the flu or something and we went home."

"What did Henry say? Was it his first panic attack?"

"He didn't say much, didn't really want to talk about it. He went straight to bed. It was horrible, Kat."

"Shit."

"Yeah. I thought I'd bring him breakfast later. Or maybe you want to do it?"

Sam looked at Kat while he was eating a piece of bacon.

"I don't know, Sam."

"He trusts you, Kat."

"You are his friend."

"I'm his mate, that's a difference."

"No, it's quibble. You and him are closer than me and him. Whatever you call it." Kat arched an eyebrow and gave her brother an annoyed glance.

"Oh, come on,you know how it is, Kat. Guys don't talk about emotional stuff like this…"

"Maybe I don't want to talk about emotional stuff with him either."

Sam gave her a knowing look. "Are you afraid you're gonna fall for him again?"

Kat blinked repeatedly, speechless for a moment.

"What are you talking about?" She crossed her arms in front of her chest. Sam leaned back in his chair. "Look, Kat, I know I was busy with my own love life at school but I wasn't completely blind. I know you were in love with Henry. You always denied it but it was obvious to me. I knew you were lying when you said he's just a friend to you and I know that your friendship ended out of the blue when Hen and Poppy became a thing. So it's not so hard to draw the conclusion that he broke your heart and that you're afraid that history is going to repeat itself."

Kat chewed on her bottom lip but she didn't say a word. She just shrugged and pulled off pieces of her bagel absent minded.

"I think he needs you, Kat. He needs what the two of you had at school. That deep, unconditional kind of friendship. I can't give him that, we're not close enough, but you can."

She looked at Sam with a frown.

"I'm not so sure. It's not that easy. What we had back then is gone."

"I'm sure it's not. It's just buried under your past. You can dig it out."

Kat closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose with a deep sigh. "I'm not a therapist."

"Good, because he has a therapist. What he doesn't have is someone who knows him like you do. Someone he can trust."

"Alright. I'll do it. I'm gonna bring him his breakfast and see if he wants to talk but I'm going to blame you if this ends in disaster."

~~~~~~

tbc

#rpf #henry cavill rpf #henry cavill #cavillry #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill fandom #henry cavill x ofc #friends to lovers #slow burn #Spotify

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the-fiction-witch · 4 years

Text

Lovely tag : whitey winn

A - Affection [How affectionate are they with you?]

Whitey Winn is rather affection but at specific times, in the office he'll barely give you anything but in bed he'll wrap you up in his arms and never let you go giving you a million kisses a minute. Even if he does like holding your hand and waist most of the time and whispering in your ear how much he loves you.

B - Butter [How much do they coddle you, and how?]

Ohhh you where coddled worse then ever! Your father had always been protective of course as your his own little girl and his only child before your mother died so being protected was just something you where used to. However when you and whitey got together you assumed it would stop that he'd let you be more independent but ohh no you where mistaken Whitey's worse then your father ever was, he was extremely protective of you holding you on his arm, sitting behind you on your horse, barely letting you out after dark unless he was with you.

And it somehow got even worse when you got married, and even more so once you got pregnant. At that point he would even let you pick up spoons for yourself.

C - Confide [How easily do they confide to you?]

He's pretty open as far as confiding goes he was very happy to tell you things as soon as you two started courting he liked telling you things and he loves listening to you tell him to.

D - Defensive [How protective are they over you?]

Super protective! Another man looks at you Whitey's growling like a wild dog pushing you behind him or into his side. One of the mine security men tried to hit on you one evening and honestly your surprised whitey didn't kill him but it was a close call if maggie hadn't have stopped the fight you think that boy would have been dead. Not to mention the time one visiting boy pinched your bottom thought your dress and by the time you had squealed and turned around the boy was knocked out in the dust and you where tight to Whitey's chest. But you know it's just what he's like and that he's just trying to help so you'll give him a little reward later after dark.

E - Exhausted [How do they take care of you when you're tired or feeling low?]

He'll spot your tried or upset from a mile away he'll find someplace cosy and sit you across his lap, and make you tell him all about it he'll play with your hair and stroke your skin while you explain nodding and agreeing at moments he needs too and once it's all explained he'll pulling you to rest your head on his shoulder and chest and let you rest till your better.

F - Fluffy [How sappily sweet can they get?]

He can be a very sappy boy, giving you flowers, giving you cuddles telling you he loves you a hundred times a day

G - Game [How much do they play around, and are they a tease?]

He's not much for teasing or playing around he'd rather just be sweet to you.

H - Happy [What's their favourite thing to do with you, that makes them happy?]

Cuddle! Or go out riding he loves sitting behind you his arms around you to hold the rains of the horse as you go off on little adventures together.

I - Initiate [Do they make the first move?]

Depends, if it's a cuddle then one hundred percent whitey is asking and moving first, but other stuff like kissing and so on its almost always you. Even after your married with children you still have to make a first move to give him a kiss or hold his hand and each normally make him go bright red

J - Jealousy [How jealous can they get and how do they show it?]

He gets super jealous. Luckily labelle doesn't have alot of men and the ones who are in labelle are mostly older men who barely do much of anything so he didn't need to worry much about you, but when those young dirty mining security men came whitey was not happy as at times it seemed almost like the intentional picked on you to wind whitey up and make him do something so they could lock him in the cells. He gets defensive, violent, he'll do anything do defend you even if it means he gets in trouble for doing it because your his girl and knowone is going to hurt you or take you away from him not while he breaths.

L - Love [How do they react to you giving them affection?]

Blush!! He blushed when you kiss him, when you hold his hand he just always has blush in those dirty cheeks. But he loves when you give him affection he just wishes it wasn't so obvious how much he liked it.

M - Married [What's it like to be married to them?]

Amazing, he always cuddles and kisses you once he's home from work, compliments atleast three times a day, and cuddles and sleeps beside you every single night he's not at work.

N - Newborn [How are they with having kids, and how would they be as a parent?]

He got so excited when you told him you where pregnant, but he wouldn't let you do anything for yourself he was going to care for your every single need until baby came. And as soon as it did you saw him smile wider then you had ever seen before he was so happy to be a daddy and he was an amazing one. He loves all your children so very much and takes such good care of them even if he does spoil them a little bit mostly because your first child was a boy and whitey was ecstatic! Having little whitey jr so he kinda spoilt him rotten. But then soon enough when little addison came he had to spoil her too so it was fair. And then elijha came so he had to spoil the boys as much as the girls and so on and so on spoiling all your children rather alot. Even if you keep saying when you have a baby in the house that you won't have anymore children after this and yet it keeps on happening. Even if you think whitey secretly really wants more children, you have said you draw the line at five but with your current tummy thats already out the window.

O - Outdoors [How are they with you in public?]

Defense and sweet, he likes holding onto you but other then that he's okay he doesn't much like kissing you or anything outside because that's privet stuff even if... Maybe the office is privet enough for a snuggle or two.

P - Propose [How would they propose, and when would that be?]

It was nervous. He barely got thought it without stuttering. Almost all of labelle came out to watch which probably didn't help as whitey let it slip to bill in the office that he was going to do it so bill told maggie and of course within an hour the whole dam down new except you. He of course had asked your father's permission first and once he had that he got you as many flowers as he could and asked you in the middle of town in front of everyone.

Q - Quarrel [How are they after a fight, and will they try to make amends right after?]

You've never been in a fight with whitey, he's too sweet, the moment your upset about something he cuddles you holds you hands and let's you explain all about it and how he can make it all better. I don't think it's actually possible to get into a fight with him over anything you can try and tell at him and he'll just stand there politely and nod agreeing with you and discusses ways he can improve and how he can help. "Of course, your right darlin' I'm sorry. I'll remember next time"

R - Romantic [How much of a hopeless romantic are they, and how do they show it?]

He is rather a hopeless romantic, he always brings you flowers after a long day of work and tells you he loves you almost constantly.

S - Snuggles [Do they like to cuddle, and how do they do it?]

Whitey loves to cuddle he almost always starts a cuddle or asks for a cuddle he adores cuddling with you, he moves just wrapping his arms around you having you engulfed in him, usually both arms around you, Maybe a leg around you too with your head nuzzled into him so you have no escape from his love.

T - Touchy [How touch starved are they, and would they show it?]

He was so touch straved when you where first together you could poke him and he'd have a heart attack, but even when he's been in the office a few nights or just hasn't seen you all that much he gets a little desperate for kisses for touching for anything you'll give him. You can tell he's getting touch starved because he'll bite on his mouth alot more and you can see it in how his eyes lingure and move much slower.

U - Urchin [What's one negative trait about them that hurts you?]

That he can be a little too accommodating t the ladies in town, you understand that Whitey Winn is the deputy of La Belle a town almost all of the women have lost their husbands but you get rather jealous when you see the women going to the office to try and bring him things in the office, he never flirts or anything you just get a little worried sometimes

V - Vibe [What energy do they give off when you're with them?]

he gives off the energy of being very cocky and strong but also very sweet like sugar, he is so blushy with you its a rarity he gets though a sentence with you before he's blushing and stuttering

W- Wedding [What are they like at their wedding?]

a mess, He cried so much when you got married, he was so happy, so excited and so thrilled your father finally allowed you two to get married, you met him in the half-finished church and half of Labelle showed up mostly all the women to see you and whitey get married and they spoilt you with presents of baked goods and wine for you, and bill spoilt you giving whitey a week off for you two's honeymoon

X - Xtreme [What lengths would they go to for you?]

He's do anything for you, anything you asked just to see you smile, back before your father found out about whitey courting you he used to ride out to the river with you just for dates even if it took about half an hour to get from his house to your spot, but he still did it every day after work.

Y - Yogurt [What's their ideal place for a date?]

A little ride out to the river, sitting down by the edge with maybe a little picnic of maybe some beer and pie, maybe a little cuddle if it gets too cold out as the sky gets dark and you can sit and stargaze together maybe He'll wrap his jacket around your shoulder if you get too cold and maybe if he's lucky he might get a kiss at your door when he walks you back to your door Before your curfew of course so he doesn't get yelled at by your father.

Z - Zipper [What clothes do they like seeing you in?]

he loves seeing you in your underdress when you don't bother to really get dressed he thinks you look sweetest that way.

#tbs #thomas sangster #whitey winn #whitey winn smut #godless whitey winn imagine #thomasbrodiesangster

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deathtale0-0 · 3 years

Text

Mother's Day

TW // police brutality, police murder, racism

It was 19:35 on Mother's Day and I was going home. Well, more like I was rushing home. I was doing that weird thing where you run a bit and then walk a bit so that people don't look at you funny, but it was dark out, so I don't know why I was even doing it. You see, I spent Mother's Day at a friend's house because ma was working a long shift at the hospital today and didn't want me to be alone, but she was meant to be home soon, and I was meant to be home already. See my problem?

Flickering lights from streetlamps chased me, happy to be of use to someone in the night, as I noticed the foolishness of what I was doing and decided to run the last stretch home. My trainers thumped dully each time they connected with the dying pavement, with each crack and break it smugly showed a naïve attempt to catch at someone's feet and drag them to its depth of humiliation and neglect. Silence encompassed the night air, only broken by my shallow pants as I checked the phone held in my nimble mocha hand to see the time - 19:37 - I would make it home before her. But that happiness was short-lived as I rounded the corner and was hit with a gut-wrenching dread. Not dread that one feels as they go to their first school dance, or when they speak in public, but the type of dread that creeps into your flesh from the cruelty of the world and seeps into your bloodstream, filling your body with the distinct sense that something is not right. This dread gripped my mind with talons in its dark prowess, and came in the form of white and blue…

I slowed to a halt as the police officer came into sight, the rules that turned my melanin into a curse in this country flashing across my mind in a panic, but it was too late, he had seen me running. Without thinking, I tucked my phone into my sleeve. He stared at me, his brown eyes pierced my brown skin as I failed to see the softness that usually came with those colour eyes and as he failed to see me as anything other than my blackness. Flustered, I scanned him, saw the dirty blond hair poking out from underneath the hat that sat proudly on his head and the mouth that was set in a hard line. I saw the tension in his muscles and the wariness of his stance as he eyed me up and down, scrutinising me. I saw him take in the Adidas joggers, the Jordan's, the black hoodie, the black baseball cap, and most of all the black skin. Today was a bad day to wear all black as well as be all black. His harsh eyes stopped at my shaking fingers clutching my duffel bag tight. My own eyes flicked down to my bag before looking back up and with shaky legs, I decided to keep walking and pretend as if nothing had happened – because nothing had, I didn't do anything wrong so there was no need for me to be nervous. Yet as I took steps forwards, I realised there was a need for me to be nervous because things happen, I just never thought that they would happen to me, but my feet walked all of one metre before the officer stepped in my path.

He stood directly under a streetlamp, "Where you heading, kid?" A question that was so simple, so easy, and yet so loaded. I was paused in the middle of the pavement, about two and a half metres away from him, stood in the spot where the light from the lamp had begun to fade – the outskirts. Growing up I knew my favourite Bible verse was 'all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God' but why was it that when he looked at me I felt like I had fallen farther than others? When he looked at me and asked that question, I felt like the biggest sinner of them all. After being silent for a moment too long he took a step forward and asked again.

"Home, sir," the words tumbled out, raw and messy, but oh so true, "I'm just heading home, sir."

"Home? Let's not pretend I didn't see you running a minute ago, where are you really heading?" His voice had a weight to it that made me sick. A quiet conviction that made me feel guilty.

"Sir, I swear I'm just going home-" the words tumbled out again, raw and messy, but oh so desperate.

"Then why were you running?" He took a step closer and I took a step back, the light surrounding me became dimmer.

"I was, it was because-" my hands were sweaty as they balled into fists but then straightened out again because I didn't want to seem angry, didn't want to seem like one of those drug-dealing thugs that the media paints us as, "-I'm, I'm late home, sir, and my ma she-"

"What's in the bag?" he demanded, his gruff voice taking on a menacing tone that sent chills up my spine.

"Sir it's nothing, it's just-"

"You just said it was nothing so how is it suddenly something, huh? Tell me where you're really coming from," he walked straight up to me and stared me in the eyes, "what you got in there kid? Who'd you rob the store for? You one of those thugs?" and the condemnation in his words almost made me believe it. I stared into his eyes and saw nothing but coldness, I thought that if we had no resemblance then it'd be over for me, so as pitiful as it sounded I hoped and prayed that he would see that I wasn't doing anything wrong if only because we both had brown eyes – he could relate to me because we both had brown eyes. Pathetic right? My body shook as his malice grew in front of me, "What, you think you guys can keep getting away with things like this? Open your bag!" and I felt tears prick at the back of my eyes as I willed myself not to cry in front of this man. I guess my silence assured him of his twisted righteousness as he shoved me to the ground with such force that I heard a sickening crack and when I touched the back of my head, it came away wet, slick with blood. My phone, although still in my sleeve had landed awkwardly on my wrist as he loomed over me like a demon, his pale skin stark against the night. "Are you not gonna answer me, boy?" the question, so casual, as he crouched beside me, baring his teeth and cruelty.

I didn't know why he was so angry. But I did. I was a criminal in his eyes. A criminal for having my skin two shades too dark, I missed the mark for acceptance in his eyes – the eyes of this country, this society. I was painted with a blackness that came from richness and royalty, but today ordained me as a target for those filled with a lust for hatred to take out their bigotry on. A blackness that was not a choice for me and yet shackled me to the fate of every other black man in this country – to die because of my blackness or live constantly reminded of it. Looking at him now, with the streetlamp behind him, I bet this scene was right to him, he was standing in the light, and here I was, sprawled out on the floor, afraid, alone, and in the dark. He shone his torch at me, and I put my hand out to block it, but as my hands went out to protect, his hands went out to his gun. I froze. As I lay there, vulnerable and with my melanin pooled around me – the dark in his city of light, of white - he kicked my bag, "Open it."

"Yes, sir," came my shaky reply as I slowly pulled myself up off the floor, my head lit up with agony. With his hands firmly plastered on his gun and his gun aimed at me, I reached for the zipper with my coffee hands and began to unzip my bag slowly. But, through some cruel twist of fate, someone called me. The call surprised me, so I let go of my sleeve and out fell the phone, but to him it was a gun…to them it's always a gun.

I felt them before I heard them, before I saw them, and I wish I could tell you how it felt, but I can't, because it hurt too much. He shot me six times in the chest before I could even say "Please," before I could even look at him and plead my case of life in this monochrome world. After the ringing in my ears stopped, I became weightless – just for one lovely moment – before my body, mind and soul dropped as one to the ground, feeling like the burden of the world that Atlas carried on his shoulders. I'd never felt so heavy, so conscious of my humanity and mortality as I did when I lay there dying. Tears streamed, desperate to fall as evidence of my life, to leave the mark that I was here, because there was no one else around to see me fall. As I felt vibrations in the earth, I looked to my side to see my phone screen lit up and ringing once more. After cringing at the brightness, I noticed that it was 19:45 and that the caller, it was ma. I was too tired to move. I lay there, in the darkness, with naught but my wheezing breaths, my inky blood seeping from my body, and my tragic story seeping from my soul to keep me company. A flash of pink caught my eyes as they started to close, pink of all things, pink that seemed so out of place in my greyscale experience. It was from my roses. I gathered my remaining strength to tilt my head to look through the half-zipped top of my bag and there were the roses I had bought for ma resting in the bottom. More tears streamed. Oh, the irony of it all. Looking up, I see the moon and decide that I want to die looking at it, simply because I have nothing else to look at. It has a sharp contrast to the darkness of the night sky, one's attention is drawn to it as it overlooks the Earth, taking over from the sun as the overseer and the one who must witness all the horrors this world has to offer. How sad it must be to be the moon. Grey, white, and black begin to swirl into each other and blend as I keep looking, the grey overtaking the white, and finally the black overtakes the grey as I close my eyes to rest.

At 19:49, ma called me again, but I was dead.

#short story #short fiction #sad #tw police violence #tw police murder #tw police brutality #original work #death #racism

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