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solena2 · 3 years

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So.

Tommy isn’t Theseus. Every time I see Techno’s analogy about Tommy being Theseus brought up I’m filled with endless rage and I’ve DECIDED!

That it’s about time I explained just why it’s so objectively incorrect.

First: a bit of backstory on Theseus, because I doubt many of you actually know much about him beyond what Techno said in his “so you want to be a hero” speech, which left out a lot of relevant details.

Theseus was a demigod with two fathers and one mother. His fathers were king Aegeus of Athens and the sea god Poseidon, and his mother was Aethra, Aegeus’ wife. Aethra raised Theseus on her own, far from Athens to avoid him being assassinated.

Aegeus left him nothing but a sword with the Athenian crest and a pair of sandals, buried under a rock so no one else could get them.

When Theseus came of age, he took the sword and sandals and headed up to Athens, slaying various monsters along the way. (It pains me to abbreviate it that much, but Techno left out everything before the Minotaur so it won’t help me much in debunking his analogy.)

Once he got to Athens, he met up with his dad, chased out his stepmom Medea, (yes, that Medea) and killed some people. Then comes the relevant part.

Crete had won a war against Athens a while back, and because of this, every seven years Athens was forced to send 14 tributes to be killed by the Minotaur. (Yes, this inspired the Hunger Games)

Theseus decided he’d volunteer and kill the Minotaur, thus ending the tribute system for good and getting one over on Athens. He promised his dad that if he won, he’d come back in a ship with white sails, as opposed to the standard mourning black that signified the death of the tributes.

So he went to Crete, met king Minos and his daughters Ariadne and Phaedra, and got sent into the labyrinth. Ariadne gave him a magic ball of string that kept him from getting lost, allowing him to find the Minotaur and then safely get out afterwards, providing he could kill it.

He killed it, led his other 13 tributes out, and sailed back home. On the way, Athena told him to leave Ariadne stranded on a tiny island in the middle of the ocean, so he immediately did so, because Theseus was an asshole.

He got home, his dad committed suicide because Theseus forgot the white sails and his dad assumed he’d died, Theseus became king and married Phaedra, and then the fun began, because again, Theseus was an asshole.

First, he cheated on Phaedra with Hippolyta, queen of the Amazons, so she left and took the kids. Next, he and his other asshole friend Pirithous decided to kidnap themselves some new wives. Theseus decided on Helen of Troy, who was a child at the time, and Pirithous decided on Persephone, which resulted in both him and Theseus getting stuck in the Underworld for a while due to pissing off Hades.

Once he got back up, he killed his son for fucking his wife, which is messed up on many levels, and then left Athens because his people were rightfully not super okay with that.

Then he goes and meets Lycomedes, who throws him off a cliff.

Next, let’s talk about Techno’s speech a bit.

He starts off by accusing Tommy of being a power hungry dictator (paraphrased), before asking him if he wants to be a hero.

Then, he provides what is apparently the archetypal example of heroism, something often associated with selflessness, kindness, and generally giving at least one singular solitary fuck about other people.

Theseus! Heroic hero who does heroic things, like, uhhh *checks notes* cheating on his wife, kidnapping children with plans to forcefully marry them, leaving people alone on tiny islands with no supplies, killing his kid, etc. etc...

So we’re off to a great start.

Then, he gives a short summary of Theseus’ life and times! He skips the first part of his life completely, which is hilarious to me because it’s the only time Theseus ever did anything actually heroic or selfless, and gets straight to the meat!

“Let me tell you a story, Tommy. A story of a man called Theseus. His country was in danger, he sent himself forward! Into enemy lines. He slayed the Minotaur! And saved his city. You know what they did to him, Tommy? They exiled him. He died in disgrace, despised by his people. That’s what happens to heroes, Tommy.”

-Technoblade

So first off, he doesn’t mention... really anything other than the Minotaur and the exile, which is leaving out a lot of relevant details, like why Theseus was exiled. (You know, killing his son in cold blood?)

Second, he doesn’t give details in general. Not that he should’ve given a full telling, or anything, but I’m always surprised by the shortness of this speech when I go back and listen to it. He pretty much just gives the barest bones of an argument and expects his audience to take it at face value. (Which they do, but it’s still bad practice)

From the more accurate (if still brief) summary if Theseus’ life I’ve just given, I’m sure you can see why this might be more than a bit dubious, as an analogy. Given cc!Technoblade is literally an English major, and doubtless knows significantly more about the myth than I do, I’d imagine this was never intended to be taken at face value.

Over and over again, c!Techno proves himself to be an unreliable narrator, and over and over again, the fandom at large takes his word as gospel.

Now, as far as a more in depth argument for Tommy as Theseus goes, I will attempt to debunk that as well, because there are some genuinely good points to be made.

First of all, most people make Dream out to be the Minotaur. Given the time this speech was made, I imagine Schlatt was the intended target of that, but with latter events in mind, Dream does make much more sense.

I’d say this is honestly pretty fair, but I don’t think Tommy takes the role of Theseus in that narrative. I’d argue he’s much more analogous to the role of Ariadne, giving the tools required to defeat Dream but ultimately not doing so through his own power, but because someone chose to take those tools and make use of them. This also provides the very interesting characterization of Punz as Theseus, which is an incredibly unique take that I hope some a Punz enthusiast does something with, because I don’t know enough about his lore to make a good analysis on that.

The idea of Schlatt as the Minotaur, as was probably intended by Techno at the time, makes much more sense, though I still think other characters fit the role better. Firstly, Schlatt wasn’t killed, he died of a heart attack, and if someone had killed him I think it’s more likely to have been Wilbur or Techno who did it than Tommy, as Tommy was still very hopeful and idealistic at the time, at least compared to his character now. You could posit Tommy as Ariadne again in this situation, given he was the one to mastermind the final charge, and though I think Tommy as Ariadne is an idea that’s worth further exploration, I’d say Fundy futs the Ariadne role here much better, with him giving the spy’s diary before being effectively shunned and left out in the cold by both Pogtopia and Manburg, much like Ariadne was abandoned in the original myth.

I’d posit the Theseus in this scenario as Techno, Wilbur, or possibly Philza, as they were the ones to actually kill things in the 16th, though Techno and Wilbur’s killings were more in the metaphorical sense, taking the second life of L’manburg.

As for the exile, Tommy exile was alike to that of Theseus only in concept. Both were sent from their kingdoms for a crime, resulting in a falling out with someone close to them, and had a precarious relationship with heights while they were gone, but that’s about where the similarities end and even then they’re superficial.

First of all, Tommy’s exile was far more because Dream was looking for an excuse to do it than because briefing actually means anything on the SMP, given how Dream had been griefing bases and blaming Tommy for it for a while before it went down. (Fun fact, Bad and Skeppy were going to burn one of his discs over this, but one of them got sick so they had to cancel the stream.)

Theseus’ exile, on the other hand, was entirely deserved, especially when you consider how serious a crime killing family was in Ancient Greek culture. It was pretty much the biggest no-no in existence, and I’m almost surprised he wasn’t just straight up executed for it.

Second, Tommy’s falling out with Tubbo was almost entirely due to outside forces, (Dream) rather than because anything Tommy had done. Though Tommy’s cavalierness towards the trial and attempts to threaten Dream with Spirit doubtless didn’t help things, Dream surrounding L’manburg in obsidian walls and threatening them to exile Tommy was entirely his own choice, and not something that can be pinned on Tommy, no matter what the apologists may say.

Meanwhile, Theseus’ falling out with Phaedra had begun long before his exile with him cheating on her. Him killing his son was merely the last in a long line of dominos to completely destroy their relationship.

Last, Tommy nearly killing himself is very different from Theseus being pushed off a cliff. Tommy’s near suicide was the direct result of physical and emotional abuse at the hands of c!Dream for what was canonically, I believe, several months? (Correct me if I’m wrong on that one.) Tommy almost jumping off a pillar because he was deliberately isolated from his support systems is nothing like Theseus being killed because he was a cocky asshole who thought he was god.

So that’s why I don’t think Tommy is anything like Theseus, and why I’m filled with endless rage by the completely uncritical acceptance of this parallel, but it’s not the whole reason it pisses me off.

It also pisses me off because, as stated earlier, cc!Techno is an English major. He knew what he was doing with this. The fandom’s insistence on refusing to acknowledge his character as an unreliable narrator is, in my opinion, acting as a massive kneecap to what could be a great analysis of how he thinks.

Specifically: why does c!Technoblade think Tommy is like Theseus?

Of all the Greek heroes to pick, why that one? Was it just the tantalizing opportunity to parallel Schlatt with a horned monster, or was it because c!Techno has some genuine in-character reason to think this myth specifically applies to Tommy.

Now, we all know people in the SMP have a habit of analogizing Wilbur and Tommy. The assumption Tommy wanted to be president, the belief that Tommy nominated Tubbo directly, the belief that he was intentionally deceiving Techno about Pogtopia’s intentions regarding Manburg... all of these stem from Wilbur. There are more cases of this, of course, but several analyses have been done in the subject already, and this is long enough without more padding.

So why does Techno think Tommy is Theseus? Well, it’s simple, isn’t it?

Wilbur is Theseus.

To be continued, because this is already too long and my brain hurts.

#original post #dream smp #dream smp analysis #technoblade #tommyinnit #technoblade critical #(i guess. honestly I didn’t say much about techno himself in this but just to be safe)#dsmp #dsmp analysis #dream smp meta #dsmp meta #my writing #can you tell i don’t like Theseus much #hated to leave out his early life stuff because it’s genuinely super interesting but it wasn’t really relevant so I had to cut it :(#if you want a more detailed description of Theseus I’d recommend the rick riordan book on Greek heroes #it’s not the most scholarly work but it gives the bare bones of the myths in an accessible way that doesn’t take an English degree to read #call me a fake nerd if you want but I like the humor and digestibility #there are typos in this post and I Do Not Care

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igotbulletproof-insomnia · 3 years

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Adopting Bangtan 09

01 previous

AN UNLIKELY WEDDING

You bit your lip as you stared at your phone. You had an email from Jimin and Taehyung’s mother. Song Jieun was your old coworker who you had adored, but who also tricked you into taking care of her children so that she could get married without worry. Your respect and opinion of her had gone down significantly with that move, but you… didn’t exactly understand, but you did appreciate that she gave her children to someone who could properly take care of them instead of leaving them to fend for themselves which had seemed to be her original plan.

What’s wrong?” Seokjin looked up from the video game he was playing, ignoring the cut scene he had watched a dozen times before now to focus on you. You could hear the younger boys playing in their bedroom, the sounds of legos clattering and mouth-made explosions louder than what their closed bedroom door could block off. They were sounds that had become familiar in the past six months, sounds that used to be made by one child and were nowhere near this boisterous.

“Nothing,” you shrugged while you scrolled through the email a second time and tried to sort out your feelings. Seokjin’s stare burned into your cheek and rolled your eyes. “I mean it, nothing is wrong. Just…” You could feel your face twisting into a dissatisfied expression and tried to relax it back into something more neutral. There were times when you found you could rely on the eldest of your children, and times when you thought it was better to keep things to yourself, and you weren’t sure which one this was.

“Someone emailed me,” you hedge. “I’m just trying to decide how I feel.”

“That’s your worried face,” said Seokjin. “You only make that face about work and about us. But you also whine when you’re worried about work, so it’s about us, isn’t it? Which one of the kids is failing school?”

“No one is failing school,” you laugh. “Namjoon could be doing better, but I’m certain he just doesn’t care as much as his teachers want him to. Neither does Yoongi…. You know, as a teacher myself, I should probably be more concerned.”

“You’re appropriately concerned,” Seokjin reassured you. “Why should you worry about things you can’t control? You’re just going to age faster.”

“You’re going to stop calling me old one day.”

“Lying isn’t healthy,”

“Says the kid who lied his way into adoption.”

“I took advantage of my situation. That’s not lying, that’s cunning.”

“I didn’t raise you like this,” you say, standing.

“No, but that’s kind of the point, isn’t it? I’m raising myself, six kids, and my guardian. I can’t tell if I’m doing a piss poor job or not.”

“Language, Kim Seokjin!”

“Dinner, seonsaengnim!” he shouted back. The problem was, you aren’t sure if he successfully distracted you from your concerns or if you successfully distracted him from you.

===

Song Jieun’s email bothered you intermittently throughout the week. It’s not like you forgot she existed. You’ve received a hefty sum into your bank account every month for taking care of the boys, enough to make you wonder exactly why her new husband didn’t want to take care of them when he would probably be spending a lot less money if they were under his own roof. So no, Song Jieun wasn’t someone you forgot existed unlike like you could the rest of your kids’ parents, she just… wasn’t relevant. So it bothered you that she was trying to make herself relevant now, after six months of silence.

“You’re doing the thing again,” Seokjin poked your face. You startled, unaware that he had approached, but thankfully kept your coffee mug full. “What are you so worried about?”

“Nothing,” you say for the umpteenth time that week. “I’m not worried about anything.”

“You’ve been ‘not-worried’ since last Thursday,” Seokjin argued.

“So then why do you keep asking me what’s wrong?” You didn’t have to turn to see the weighted stare he gave you, you could feel it. That was the thing about your kids, all of them. They had a way of making you feel like you were the one in trouble, you were the one being raised instead of the other way around. Some days you were convinced that they were the ones keeping you around, explicitly for financial reasons.

“If you’re just going to insist on being stubborn,” Seokjin sighed. He poured two cups of coffee, one for himself and one for Yoongi, and turned the kettle on for Namjoon. The other boys would be zombie-walking their way into the kitchen for breakfast soon, so you and Seokjin set to work preparing leftovers from dinner a few nights ago.

“Song Jieun wants to visit the boys,” after a long, silent moment, you finally admit your concern. The kettle was puffing it’s pre-whistle warning, so you turned it off, sitting the pot on its wicker table mat until Namjoon made his way to the table.

“Who’s Song Jieun?” asked Seokjin. “Which boy? Not me, right?”

“No, of course not you, silly. You won’t even tell me your parents’ names. How am I supposed to know when they come to visit?”

“Trust me, they won’t,” Seokjin’s tone left no room for discussion, just a sad or regretful sort of resentment.

“If you say so,” you shrugged off your curiosity, familiar with how closed-off this kid got when it came to his home life before you. “Song Jieun is Taehyung’s mom and Jimin’s stepmom.”

“The coworker who tricked you into adopting them?”

“That’s what you got out of that?”

“Isn’t that what happened?”

“That’s besides the point,”

“That is the point.”

“What’s what point?” Namjoon shuffled into the kitchen.

“Our guardian is trying to decide if the twins should see their mother.” Seokjin answered.

“That’s not what I said,”

“That’s what you were going to say.”

“Everyone else gets nice, obedient, adoring children,” you grumbled. “I get sassy monsters who boss me around.”

“You raised us like this,” Namjoon said absently.

“I did not, you raised yourselves.”

“Same thing,” both boys speak in unison.

“I’m giving you two away.”

“Good luck living with Yoongi without us,” Seokjin shrugged. “You’ll be begging me to come back by the end of the week.”

“Joke’s on you, this is the end of the week.”

“My point still stands.”

“Okay, I quit, I won’t win this one,” you literally throw your hands in the air.”

“Good,” Jin grins at you in that cheeky way he’s mastered, taunting you.

“So what’s this about the twin’s mom though?” asked Namjoon. “I thought she…” he trailed off, but you understood what he was saying, or rather, what he didn’t want to say. I thought she didn’t want them.

“Yes and no,” you say. “She just… it’s… not exactly complicated, not if I were in her position, but… let’s just say, some people are stupid and not everyone has the same priorities.”

“Song Jieun chose to make herself happy over taking care of her kids?” Seokjin translated. “She didn’t want to take them to live with her new husband?”

“More or less,” You agree, taking note of the bitterness in his tone.

“You’re not allowed to get married,” Namjoon mumbled from the table.

“Excuse me?”

“You’re not allowed to leave us or get rid of us because you want to be married,” Namjoon repeated. He’s obviously still half asleep from the way he lays his head down in his arms, but your heart clenches just a little bit from the casual desperation he speaks with.

“If I were to get married,” you said, “my future spouse would know that they come in eighth place anyway. I’m not getting rid of you, even your original parents would have to fight me. God will have to fight me.”

“But you’re still not allowed,” said Namjoon.

“Drink your tea, you’re talking crazy,” said Seokjin. “Our guardian will have to actually date first, and we all know that won’t happen.”

“The disrespect, I tell you!”

It’s after breakfast and during the chaos of getting seven young boys dressed and prepared for school when Seokjin knocks on your bedroom door frame, wearing an anxious expression.

“... Can I talk to you for a moment?”

“What’s up?” you asked. Seokjin walked fully into the room and closed the door.

“About… the twins? I… I don’t know what you’re thinking about, and that’s valid, but… I think you should maybe let them see her?” Seokjin didn’t fidget like the rest of the kids did. He leaned against the door, arms crossed and focused his eyes fully on you. It was moments like these when you realized exactly how mature your eldest was, and you recognized that most of it wasn’t because of you. Namjoon and Yoongi were you. Seokjin had probably been raising himself for longer than he’s lived with you.

“Okay,” you said.

“I just… if it was me, I would want to know that she still cared, right? And she does, I guess. You mentioned that she sends them money, and she wrote you a letter asking forgiveness, so that has to mean something. I just don’t want them feeling abandoned like the rest of us. Not if they don’t have to.”

“I’m just worried that it will confuse them even more,” you admitted. “It took weeks before Jimin would talk to us openly. Jieun-ssi isn’t going to stay. She’ll come for an afternoon or a day, take the kids out, spoil them, and then bring them back here, and they’ll both be wondering why. And I don’t know how to answer that question.”

“With the truth, obviously,” Seokjin rolled his eyes. “You’re always straight-forward with us. Why should this be any different?” Because they’re younger than you were. Because they were given away, not abandoned. Because their parent still cares from a distance. Because I don’t like making you all cry. Because picking up pieces has never been fun.

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” you said instead. “I’ll think about it.”

“Okay,” Seokjin nodded, and you can see him visibly deflate, relieved to be finished with the conversation. “That’s all I wanted to say. Don’t forget to take your lunch with you.”

“Make sure all the kids have theirs,” you countered.

“It’s funny because you thought I didn’t already do that,”

“I love you, Kim Seokjin,” was your response.

“I love you too, I guess.”

=======

Your talk with Seokjin gave you a new perspective, but you still felt apprehensive about everything. You just didn’t like the idea of hurting Jimin and Taehyung any more than they already have been. What type of guardian would you be if you just let them walk back into heartbreak? What if this was just a one-time visit and Song Jieun never came to see her children again? What do you do when the boys ask to see her again? You had been lucky that you only had to have one conversation about not being able to take the boys to see their mother in the last six months, but if Jieun could make the time and the trip to come visit, then what will be your excuse now? What if this visit was actually a prelude to taking the boys back home with her?

Oh.

Huh.

So that was the real problem then. You didn’t want the boys to leave you. As much as you groaned and complained about taking in so many kids -- usually just to yourself, but sometimes your stress got the better of you in front of the kids -- you loved them. Each one of them, you loved and adored them and the thought of any of them leaving you or being taken away hurt. Not only that, but where in the hell would any of those parents get off, what right did any of them have to come to you and even fix their mouths to ask you for “their” kid back? You had words prepared for each and every so-called “parent” of all seven of your boys, copies of your lost child police reports, drafts of parental rights transfer papers, the phone number for several NCPA lawyers, and a fist just itching to make contact.

But what if Taehyung and Jimin preferred to be with Jieun anyway? She is their mother. She raised them for years, even if she was Jimin’s stepmother. You’ve only had the “twins” as you and the older boys had taken to calling them, for six months. Why would they want to stay with you?

“Okay, but she didn’t say she wants to take the kids,” you told yourself against the slew of depressing thoughts. You retrieved your phone from your pocket and opened your emails. Finally pressed reply. “She just wants to visit. A visit is… safe. It’ll be okay.”

Probably.

=======

Later that day you received a new email. Song Jieun will be in town that weekend. Tomorrow.

It took a lot of effort for you not to swear and make plans to take the kids out of town.

=======

Song Jieun was pretty. She wasn’t particularly tall or “skinny” like what TV liked to portray, but she was hippy and had a cute face and short hair that she curled most days. She favored dresses with blazers or oversized sweaters and skinny jeans, with pale makeup and dark pink lipsticks. It was easy to pick her out at the cafe she asked to meet at. She sat alone off to the side, a coffee already in front of her, but two plates with fruit-decorated cakes were also placed nearby. You considered telling her that the boys weren’t allowed any sweets right now. It wouldn’t have been a lie, but it wasn’t the whole truth either. They weren’t allowed sweet things like cakes until after dinner and only when they behaved well. Still, you decided that was just your frustration and jealousy talking. You didn’t want to punish the two boys because of their mother, so you bite your tongue and hold your bitterness and let it go.

“Jieun-ssi,” you greet uselessly, as the moment Taehyung and JImin saw her they sprinted across the room to tackle the woman in hugs. Jieun’s smile stretched across her face and she cooed and made cute noises as she greeted her sons in return. You felt something creep in your chest that felt a lot like jealousy. But you weren’t jealous. You couldn’t be. You just hugged them this morning when they tried to tickle you awake. You held both of their hands from your house to the cafe. You had nothing to be jealous of, they were your kids now.

“How have you been?” Jieun asked when you sat down across from her. Jimin and Taehyung were already seated and digging into the cakes she bought for them. You barely had a chance to answer before your chatterbox was rattling off every activity he’s done for the last six months to his mother. Jimin grinned and threw in his two-cent’s worth every few minutes, but generally let Taehyung carry the conversation for him. And you, in spite of all of the emotions pressing on your chest and clouding your judgement and making you really, really want to shake Song Jieun, you enjoy yourself. You watch your boys -- your boys -- smile and chatter and sing and show off for their mother. You wonder if they’ll be okay going home, if you’ll have tears to clean up later, or arguments to break up, or just pieces to sort out and glue, but right now the kids are happy, and right now, that’s what you’ll enjoy.

=======

Taehyung climbed into your bed that night. He should have been asleep an hour ago at least, you’re sure, but he’s seemed to have a lot on his mind since this afternoon, and you’ve been letting the kid have his own space to figure out his thoughts. As hyper as he normally is, Taehyung is also prone to moments where he just sits and fiddles and thinks and you’ve learned that it doesn’t do any good to bother him about it.

“Can’t sleep?” Taehyung shook his head as he slid across the blankets to bury his face into your shirt. You curled an arm around his shoulders and held him close.

“Mommy…” Taehyung started and trailed off. “Is Mommy happy without me?”

It felt like your heart stopped with the words of his question, but you continued to brush his hair with your fingers. It was a difficult question to answer. You wanted to be honest, but you also didn’t want to hurt him. Unfortunately, there weren’t too many ways to answer without hurting Taehyung one way or another.

“What do you mean?” Taehyung was quiet for another short moment before he spoke again.

“Mommy… didn’t seem sad. And she said she’ll see us another time. And… she got married, but she didn’t want to keep me and Jiminie… So I started wondering… is she happy now? Happier than she was before when it was just me and her and Jiminie? Did we -- I don’t think -- I --” And the kid seemed to break then, all of the tears that hadn’t been shed for six months seeming to finally culminate into an emotional outburst. You shushed him, holding him just a little more tightly, and the fingers in his hair moved down to stroke his back. This was the thing you had wanted to avoid, and while part of you felt satisfied to be right, most of you just fought your own tears. It hurt to see one of your kids so hurt. You aren’t a stranger to crying children, but this emotional distress was something that never got better. You thought that maybe Jieun had talked to the boys beforehand, maybe Taehyung had dealt with his emotions before he came to live with you and that was why he seemed so well-adjusted. Clearly, Taehyung had just been living in denial, or maybe with the belief that his mother would come back for him “later,” that you were only a temporary home.

“This isn’t your fault, Taetae,” you murmured. “You didn’t do anything wrong. Sometimes… sometimes adults make hard decisions. We think we’re doing the right thing and… sometimes it’s hard to see if we’ve made the right choice or not.” You sighed, picking through your words super carefully. “I think… I think that your mother made what she thought was the best decision for both herself and for you and Jimin. She believed she would be happy with her new husband. But she did not believe you and Jiminie would be happy. So she put you somewhere that you could be. Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, but I’m still sad,” Taehyung cried harder.

“I know,” you said, “and that’s okay. I would be sad too.”

“I just want my mommy back,”

“I know.”

“I don’t want you to get married,” Taehyung said suddenly, long after his sobs had calmed down. Tears still fell, but slowly now. “I don’t want you to send me away too.”

“If you listen to your Jinnie-hyung, he says that won’t happen because I don’t date anyway.”

“Mommy didn’t date for a long time… and then she did. And then she got married.”

“I won’t get rid of you even if I did get married, Taetae,” you told him.

“You’re still not allowed to get married,” he argued. “Or date. You have to be mine forever and ever, okay?”

“No matter what, I will be yours forever and ever,” you agreed.

“Can I sleep here tonight?” Taehyung asked. “I'm comfy and you make me not sad.”

“Of course,” you said. “You’re comfy like a teddy bear, I don’t want you to go.”

=======

In the morning, Taehyung was bouncing off the walls, screaming as he chased Jungkook around the house. Jimin was curled into a corner of the sofa, giggling while he watched his brothers play and encouraging Taehyung in his antics. You could hardly tell that Taehyung had an emotional breakdown the previous night. You knew he was far from being “over” his feelings about his mother, he was only eight and the feelings were complicated. But he was happy for now and that made you happy. You’ll deal with the noise and the chaos and shout at the kids yet again about running inside where things were breakable including themselves as long as they kept smiling.

Surprisingly, it was Namjoon who came knocking at your door after bedtime that night. Similar to Taehyung, he didn’t speak or ask permission, just closed the door behind him and slid into your bed. Buried himself beneath the blankets and stuck his head beneath the pillow and tucked his gangly limbs into a ball. You were familiar with these moods, but haven’t seen one in years, not since you took in Seokjin. So you finished the chapter you had been reading, turned off the light, and sank down to lay your head on your pillows. Similar to Taehyung, Namjoon would speak when he was ready, when he found the right words to use to express his feelings.

“You really won’t get married, right?” Namjoon whispered beneath the pillow next to you. His voice was heavily muffled, but you’d been waiting for him to speak for some time. You just didn’t expect for him to continue a joke conversation from several days ago.

“What’s wrong with me getting married?” you asked.

“If you get married, you’ll have to get rid of us.”

“There is no world where I will give up any of you just to get married, Namjoon.”

“But that’s what happens, isn’t it?” said Namjoon. “Adults… if they aren’t married, but they have kids… they get rid of them so that they can date. Because kids get in the way. Because it’s stupid to take care of other people’s kids.”

“Why does it sound like you just called me stupid?” Your sarcasm probably wasn’t appropriate for the moment, but the words slipped before you thought about it.

“We’re really lucky to have you, we know that,” said Namjoon. “But that just means --”

“Namjoon, I’m going to stop you right there,” you cut him off before he finishes. You remove the pillow from his face so that he can hear you clearly, and card your fingers through his hair. “I didn’t create any of you. I didn’t ask for any of you. But I have you. And I love you. I adore you. I will tear apart skies, drain oceans, and vanquish God if it will keep you all safe and happy, okay? If your parents ever come back for you, I will press charges against them and make it so that they can never look at you, let alone hurt you ever again, do you understand me, Kim Namjoon? You and Yoongi and Jungkook and Seokjin and Hoseok and Taehyung and Jimin, you’re all mine. You’re my kids, all seven of you, and I will be damned if any lover or spouse, or anything at all, comes between me and you. I don’t say that because it sounds good -- although seriously, you have to admit that this is one of my better speeches,” -- at that, Namjoon giggled, the noise muted and soft, but a win was a win -- “but I say these things because I mean them. I will put a brick in the hospital for you, Joonie.” You hesitate, but continue anyway. “If it weren’t for you, I may have left the country at the end of that year. Teaching is fun, but I wasn’t super happy before. But then you asked me to take you home and you were so cute that I got attached almost immediately. I didn’t want to take you to the police and have them send you to your parents. I liked having someone to come home to. I liked taking care of you. Most people go get a pet or a lover when they’re feeling lonely, but here’s me, collecting kids like you’re pokemon cards.”

“No one collects pokemon cards anymore,”

“What, is Yu-Gi-Oh back in style?”

“What even is that?”

“The coolest card game ever. Period.” Namjoon laughs again, and you feel accomplished.

“It’s not that cool if I’ve never heard of it,” Namjoon argues.

“Joonie. I love you. But even I know you aren’t the coolest among your classmates.”

“I’m the coolest out of all my friends!”

“I won’t argue about that. I’m also sure that in your group of friends, ‘coolest’ means ‘knows the biggest words and has the best grades.’”

“You’re just jealous,”

“Absolutely. I wish I knew as many words as you do. Imagine how much fun I’d have fussing at you kids in Smart People language!”

“Why are you like this?”

“Please, other kids wish they had someone as cool as me taking care of them.”

Namjoon cuddled closer to you in the bed, laying his head on your shoulder and gripping your pajama shirt. You spend a few minutes massaging his scalp, a soothing gesture for you just as much as it is for him. After a few minutes, you begin drifting off, believing Namjoon is on the verge of sleep as well.

“Are you really okay?” he asks. “With taking care of all of us? You don’t… want to go back home?”

“I am home, silly,” you flick the side of his head gently. “I love you. And even if I wanted to go back to my home country, don’t think I won’t take each one of you with me. I said you’re mine. I mean it.”

“Okay.”

And it’s not that you don’t believe him, but you know your kid. You know he internalizes things and finds convoluted ways to take blame for other peoples’ problems, including your own. You know it will be a while yet before he truly accepts and believes you when you say you want to keep him and enjoy taking care of him. But you also know that he wants to believe you and he’s trying. You idly wonder if you’ll have to have some sort of discussion in the morning, an announcement over breakfast that no children will be displaced in the event of an unlikely wedding. You dismiss the thought, deciding it was more likely to incite panic and give you a headache more than anything else.

To find more of my child-bangtan fics, select the "Collecting Strays" tag at the bottom of this page ^_^

#bts #bts fan fiction #bts scenarios #kim taehyung #bts v #kim seokjin #kim namjoon #bangtan #kid bts #bts army #cross posted on ao3 #wow I just realized #kim line #reader insert #darkbalance #collecting strays

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beesmygod · 3 years

Note

relevant to your hitmen of destiny tweets; any other obscure webcomics that you think are really good and deserve more attention?

there are a lot! to be fair my pulse on what webcomics are good are limited by the fact that i rarely peruse tapas or webtoons bc i think the company are morally bankrupt lol. webtoons more than tapas but seeing western artists do a bad job of trying to make vertical layout comics because its the only free template available now is kind of depressing. i also have no idea what "obscure" is because i post with a ton of people who immediately clocked me as talking about hitmen for destiny before i even mentioned the name so that odesn't strike me as obscure lol. idk i'll just post some i like that still exist as far as i know.

anyway,

harry bogosian created "demon's mirror" and "a better place" . demon's mirror is still on my list to read but i really enjoyed "a better place". i believe both are ended now so you have two complete works to pick at :) i thought the "antagonist" of a better place was well done and presented a legitimately difficult to deal with problem because of who she is and what she's doing and why. just well done honestly. like a satisfying meal for your brain. you finish and you're like "yeah! that was nice!"

read it here

i really doubt simon hanselmann is obscure considering the amount of work he's put out through fantagraphics but his most recent work "CRISIS ZONE" revolving around his repurposed characters from children's literature megg, mogg and owl having to endure a series of 2020 specific nightmares after the lockdown starts. not for the fainthearted or people looking for something uncontroversial. it's hysterical in how close it flies to dealing with taboos by creating a cast of the most deliberately awful people to explore them. here's werewolf jones making an onlyfans to make money during the pandemic.

me too werewolf jones.

simon hanselmann posts his work on instagram. but instagram isnt really conductive to reading comics so you should buy the books.

supermegacomics still updates with total bangers occasionally. featuring a very simple and unpretentious art style, supermegacomics gets you to laugh by being strange yet joyful without forgetting to tell jokes about the absurdity of the behavior of the inhabitants of the sueprmega world. feels like it was created in someone's middle school notebook, but consistently funny.

read it here

also here's the link to "hitmen for destiny" for people who want it. i love this fucking comic. i think it completely re-wired my brain after i read it. im in the middle of re-reading it now and i for real forgot how fucking good it is. this is probably my third time reading it. that's my sell: its probably my absolute favorite webcomic of all time.

here!

drop-out requires a general trigger warning for pretty much everything you can think of, which i'm assuming will put some people off of reading it. however, it is a complicated and painful story that i really appreciate the author creating and sharing with us. its extremely rare for me to read a comic and see my experiences with depression reflected back at me accurately and without trying to shield away or deflect from what. this is an unflinching comic. it took guts to make. and i love it.

read it here

ok thats all for now. im doing that thing where people ask me for recommendations and then i forget everything ive ever liked in my life

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wondernimbus · 4 years

Text

a ghost story — cedric diggory

pairing: cedric diggory x female!reader

prompt: the thing with love is that it doesn't matter who it’s between; even if it's between someone who’s alive and someone who isn’t.

t/w: mentions of death

a/n: ahhh probably not gonna be able to post as much as i used to anymore bc i’ve been spending too much time on tumblr & social media DDD: anyways yay cedric

If you wander the halls of the Hogwarts castle, it's likely you'll come across a translucent figure or two, some eager to talk to you and others who won't even bat an eye.

Ghosts. Some have been around for decades, others for entire centuries, but many have aimlessly roamed the grounds for so long no one really knows—or cares—where or when or how they died. There are those that are bitter and hold incessant grudges; they wander through walls, angrily uttering empty threats under their breaths that they have long since lost the ability to truly carry out. They are ghosts after all; mere imprints of the departed soul, according to the usual textbook, and there are a variety of things that they can no longer do that they once were able to when they were alive.

Take the young Hufflepuff ghost, for example, who died at the young age of seventeen, long before she could truly live her life beyond the school walls. Before she could graduate or find love or do whatever was on her agenda.

That in itself is a tragedy. But if you happen to come across her in the castle—because Merlin knows she is always, always wandering, never in one place at one time—you will see that the last thing she seeks is vengeance.

Quite the opposite, actually.

—

There were times when [Y/N] regretted choosing to stay.

Times when she drifted through the corridors of Hogwarts and found herself wishing she’d left all of it behind and moved on to the afterlife—no matter how uncertain the idea of it seemed—instead of having to live every single day watching students go about talking and laughing and living the life she never got to live.

It could have been torture; watching them grow from timid, wide-eyed children oblivious to the workings of the world, to reckless teenagers who took every moment they had for granted, to slightly more mature versions of themselves, ready to venture out into the world beyond them and go down whichever path they wanted to. Become an Auror, maybe. Or a Healer. Start a family, grow a business, explore the world.

It could have been torture.

But that was only depending on which way she looked at it. She could have looked at those very same students and seen a life she never got to experience. But she could have also looked at each of them and seen a life she could experience over and over with each new batch of innocent first-years—and yes, it wasn't her life to live, per se, but wasn't that the magic of it all? To watch from the sidelines and witness them grow and blossom and do as much as they could with the life they'd been given?

So yes—there were times she regretted choosing to stay—but there were also times she was grateful she did.

It was the little things like whenever she spotted a lost first-year and helped him find his way. Or when she roamed the corridors and earned waves from friendly students. Or when she told them stories like the one about the Bloody Baron and Peeves fighting and the other ghosts having to break them up. (It was a story that she told quite often, but one they—especially the children—never got tired of.)

And in exchange, they told her stories. Who was dating who. Who broke up with who. Who might be breaking up with who. She'd become a friend to many students; a listening ear, albeit a translucent one.

But the catch was obvious: those students had to leave eventually, and [Y/N] had to stay.

It was sad, at first, having to bid farewell to her friends when they graduated. But it had been a hundred years and [Y/N] had grown used to it. The knowledge of forever being stuck at seventeen while they got to age and marry and do as much as they wanted to with the rest of the time they have.. well, it didn't quite hurt as much anymore.

It shouldn’t hurt when she had to say goodbye. At least not anymore, when she'd been doing it over and over for the last century.

So it shouldn’t have hurt—the idea of losing him. He was just one of the thousands of students she'd met, after all. Just one more person she had to let go of.

It really shouldn’t have hurt.

But it did. And [Y/N] may have been a ghost, but she wasn't dumb, so it didn't take her long to figure out that it hurt because she'd fallen in love. It was a very stupid move on her part, given that she was a bloody ghost and he was very much alive and human, but. Well. Love was love—no matter who it was between.

—

[Y/N] remembers Cedric when he was just eleven years old, young and energetic and a little naïve.

He was one of the nicer ones, if not the nicest. (Because of course there were those that weren’t as open to the idea of befriending a lonely Hufflepuff ghost; why bother talking to someone dead?)

Cedric had strayed away from his group of first-years to approach her by the staircases. She’d been hovering above the banister, watching them fondly—a little longingly—until he came up to her, beamed with a blinding sort of brightness, stuck his hand out, and then said, “Hi, it’s nice to meet you!”

[Y/N] had stared at him, slightly surprised. Usually it was the first-years that took a little longer to befriend, given that most of them had grown up believing ghosts were to be feared, but every few years or so there’d be someone like the little eleven-year-old boy in front of her whose name she did not yet know, eager to make friends—even with a ghost.

”Hi there,” she’d said, own lips quirking up into a small grin as she stared down at him. “Are you sure you want me shaking your hand? It’s going to be a little cold.”

”That’s perfectly fine!” His eyes were bright; extraordinarily so. They gleamed with so much childlike innocence that [Y/N] found herself thinking back to vague bits of her youth that she didn’t know she remembered. “You looked lonely, so.”

She’d laughed. “Well, if you say so.” And when she reached out and shook the little boy’s hand—or, well, tried to—her own slipped right through his solid one.

He’d flinched and pulled his hand back. “That was really cold!”

Another laugh. “See, I told you.”

”Well, it was nice meeting you, anyway. I’m Cedric, and—“

”Cedric!” a Hufflepuff prefect was calling to him. “Come on, now, we’ve got to get to the common room!”

Cedric had pouted. “Well, I’ll see you around.. um..“

”[Y/N],” she’d told him, smiling softly, glad to make a new friend. “My name was [Y/N].”

—

She saw much of Cedric over the years, given that he was in Hufflepuff and thus often roamed the same corridors she haunted. But she had a feeling that even if he weren’t, he was still the type of person to go out of his way to search the vast grounds of the Hogwarts castle to look for her, because to Cedric, she was just as much of a friend as any of his other human ones.

She watched him grow with the passing of time, along with the other students, although part of her had grown especially fond of him. Cedric, whose talent for storytelling rivaled her own—whose kindness and compassionate heart rivaled just about anyone else’s—was not just another fleeting moment in her countless years at hogwarts. [Y/N] knew she would remember him when he left. She just didn’t know how hard it would be when he did.

—

When Cedric reached sixteen, it was only then that he changed in [Y/N]’s eyes; he’d gone from a little eleven-year-old with round, pink cheeks to something akin to a man, athletic and intelligent and exceptionally handsome.

When Cedric reached sixteen, [Y/N] was still seventeen. The same age she’d been for a long, long time.

[Y/N] was a ghost, and she had no real purpose anymore. Cedric was alive, and he had classes to go to. Other friends to talk to who had living, beating hearts and something in life to actually look forward to. Friends who he would still talk to long after he graduated. Friends who wouldn’t be bound to the castle until the end of time (if there was an end).

And yet Cedric spoke to her as though she was anything but a ghost.

He didn't just briefly wave to her whenever he saw her in the hallways, no; he would ask her how her day went, as if it actually mattered. He confirmed her previous suspicious; he didn't just count on their opportune meetings. He looked for her. His friends would find it strange, but he'd detach himself from them in favor of roaming the corridors, searching for a ghost, eager to tell her about his latest adventures.

Cedric made her feel like she was human. Made her feel like she was alive.

Whenever she spoke to him, it was as though her heart started to beat again for the first time in a hundred years. She wondered if he felt the same way, even if the notion of it was ridiculous. The idea of a ghost catching feelings for a human was a bizarre idea in and of itself, but of a human reciprocating those feelings? For someone who technically didn't even exist?

It was unheard of.

It was unheard of, but it wasn't impossible.

—

[Y/N] spent many nights in the Astronomy tower.

She couldn't remember much of her life. The memories faded away from her with each passing day, becoming blurry at the edges, like the longer time stretched on the farther away they went. They were still there, but she only vaguely recalled workings of the world, emptied of specifics, faces, names back from when she was alive. Like shelves labeled for memories, except they were empty.

She couldn't remember how she died, either, or why she chose to stay. It was odd. As far as she knew, the other ghosts knew fully well how they came to perish. But she wondered if maybe it was better that way; maybe she forgot for a reason.

But the Astronomy tower felt oddly familiar. There was something about it that drew her in. She knew it was relevant to her, in some way, even though she wasn't entirely sure how.

So she would stay there at sundown, looking out over the edge of the railing waiting for a blanket of stars to appear in the sky. Waiting for memories to come back to her, even though part of her knew that they weren't likely to.

The first time Cedric ever found her there, in his sixth year, he'd exclaimed, "There you are! I’ve been looking everywhere for you", and—oh.

For a ghost, [Y/N] always seemed to be exceptionally happy. Her eyes were always impossibly bright for a dead soul. But now she looked the saddest Cedric had ever seen her, like she was thinking back on all those hundred years she spent with the students and yet at the same time so very alone.

The sun had already set, the last bit of daylight filtering into the tower from the open sides. Cedric had walked forward and silently joined [Y/N] at the edge, sitting down on the floor next to her and staring out at the horizon.

He didn't say anything. He knew this wasn't about him; [Y/N] had to be the one to speak first.

Cedric didn't count the seconds as they passed, just stared out at the fading light as he waited. And waited. And he knew he would wait as long as it took.

And then, finally—"I wish I remembered how I died," she said quietly, her eyes glued to the scenery before her, and if she were alive there would have been tears inside them. Instead there was only a painful sort of wistfulness. "Or why I chose not to move on. I wish I knew, just so I’d feel justified in staying. But I don't. So now I don't know why I’m still here instead of—" she paused, frowning. "Well, I don't know what's beyond here, really. What real death is like. But it can't be too bad, can it?"

Another brief pause.

“I get brief flashes of my life sometimes," she murmured. "Nothing too big. Nothing enlightening. Nothing that really answers my questions. But I get most of them when I’m right here, in this tower."

For the first time since he sat next to her, [Y/N] turned her head just a fraction of an inch to look at him, eyes meeting his. "And when I’m with you," she said, voice soft. "When I’m with you, Cedric, I remember what it felt like to be—" a sharp exhale, as though it was exhilarating to say it out loud, "alive."

Cedric held her gaze for a few seconds. Maybe more. And then, quietly, as though he was letting her in on a secret (and in a way, he was): "If I told you I loved you, what would you say?"

There. It was a revelation, if anything, both to himself and to her. All the confirmation both of them needed that humans could love whoever they wanted to, even ghosts like her. Cedric had done it, hadn’t he?

He’d known her for seven years, and slowly, gradually, he’d fallen for her. No matter the fact that they were from two drastically different worlds. That was enough proof.

She was unresponsive for a while. And then she laughed. A sad sound. She turned back to the horizon, such little light left to seep through her translucent skin. "I’d say you were daft, falling in love with a ghost."

"If I asked you to wait for me," he reached out towards her hand, which was set on the floor. This time Cedric didn’t wince, even though it felt like he’d plunged his arm in icy water. "What would you do?"

She frowned down at their hands. It took her a long, long time, but when she spoke again, Cedric knew she meant it.

"I’d wait," she told him. Her smile was sad. "I’d wait for you, Ced. And I can only hope that you'll remember me, when the time comes.”

—

[Y/N] had been ready.

She’d prepared herself for the idea of waiting for a long time. A few more decades at most.

Cedric was going to leave, and she was going to stay. He would graduate and she would stay. He’d find a job, live the rest of his life to the best of his abilities, get married, start a family. Cedric would die, someday, and [Y/N] would stay at Hogwarts, forever seventeen, counting on the almost-promise he’d made back at the Astronomy tower.

A few decades more and she wouldn’t be so lonely anymore. A few decades more and maybe she’d start feeling a little like herself again.

But the idea of Cedric staying for her when he does die years and years and years from then—of asking him not to move forward into the afterlife and stay bound to the castle forever, just so she’d have someone to be with..

It was selfish.

But Cedric told her that it was his choice. When the time came, he said, he would choose to stay with her.

It almost made Cedric cry, thinking about it—about her just being here, staying just like this, for years more, and him growing older and older, growing apart. In the grand scheme of things, seven years spent learning to love a ghost shouldn’t have meant much, especially for her, who would have centuries more time to exist. But sitting here, with her cold hand almost in his, Cedric decided that the seven years he'd spent with her were the happiest moments of his life.

It could be sad. He could think of those times and see seven years of being so close to the girl he loved and yet at the same time so terribly far; unable to hold her the way he really wanted to. But he could also see the seven happiest years of his life; a time filled with love and adventure. A time that defined him, molded him into everything he was today.

So no, Cedric wasn't sad. He was the happiest he'd ever been and would ever be in his entire life.

—

”Aren’t you scared?”

”Of what?”

”Of dying.”

Cedric kept his eyes on the stars, gaze wistful as though he was thinking of a life that he had yet to experience. "I don’t think so. Not if I think of what's waiting for me beyond it."

"Decades from now."

He turned to look at [Y/N], then down at where their hands were just inches apart, one solid and the other translucent. One dark in the night, one glowing silver. “Decades.”

A lot could happen in several decades. Cedric could change his mind. Several decades from now, he could look back on the young ghost from the Hogwarts castle and decide that maybe she wasn't worth staying for. Or he could just forget, and never once look back over his shoulder.

But [Y/N] trusted him, and she was ready to wait.

She’d wait for as long as it took him.

—

The day came far earlier than she'd been expecting.

When news broke that one of the Triwizard Champions had been murdered, [Y/N] had felt fear, for the first time in a very long time.

And when the hushed whispers of horror turned into murmurs of Cedric’s name, mourning him, crying for him, [Y/N] had felt anguish so terrible it was as though she was dying all over again.

Cedric wasn’t supposed to die. Not this early.

—

The next time she saw Cedric, for the first time in seven years her hands didn’t go through his anymore.

—

Cedric never regretted it, choosing to stay.

Admittedly, when Death came knocking and asked him the question he thought he'd have to answer far, far into the future, there was a split-second of hesitance.

Just a tiny moment of doubt. Just one. Moving forward into the afterlife, letting Death take him once and for all, leaving this world to set forth into whatever lay beyond it; it was the idea of that that made him hesitate.

But then he thought of [Y/N]—of the idea of being able to hold her the way he could never have done in life, and to be able to do that as much as he wanted to in death. Of being able to finally be with her. Of having her after being so terribly close to it for so long.

He thought of her, and he knew what he wanted.

—

For centuries, there have been two young ghosts who roam the corridors of the Hogwarts castle hand-in-hand, eager to offer a helping hand to anyone who might need it, never running out of tales of love and magic and laughter to tell the students, who, in turn, go to them bearing stories of their own.

They died too young, the pair of them. But the youthful gleam in their eyes never died out, and neither did the love they held for each other—the love that was there long before the other died. The love that will stay until the end of time (if there is an end).

Often you can find them roaming the Hufflepuff corridors. Some say they see the two ghosts in the Astronomy tower, mostly during sundown, sitting on the edge by the railings as the last traces of daylight trickle in through the open windows.

But they are always there, if you look hard enough. Always eager to offer a helping hand. Never apart. Never one without the other.

They call them Cedric and [Y/N]—the ghosts who died too early, and yet were lucky enough to find love. One in life and the other in death.

Call it magic. Call it a miracle. Call it nothing at all; but somehow, two people who were perhaps never meant to find love in each other, got what they wanted, in the end.

And Death knows all they ever wanted was each other.

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writerpeach · 4 years

Text

Office Hours

Berry Good Johyun x Reader

Categories: smut, public sex, student! Johyun

1703 words

I was organizing my fics this week and somehow I never posted this. It’s very short and not edited at all but I figured it was a good time to post during berry good’s comeback. Stream accio.

“I don’t think this is a good use of office hours, Miss Johyun.”

“Nonsense, professor. I need help going over the material. That’s what you’re here for isn’t it to help me?”

“Yes, but back in my office. That’s why they’re called office hours. What exactly are you looking for in this library, and why can’t you ask the staff? That’s what they’re trained for.”

“I don’t like talking to them. They’re rude and stuffy and always stare at me weird.“

“Maybe it’s because your skirts are shorter than most of my student’s attention spans.”

Johyun huffed at your little teasing and carried on farther into the depths of the library’s bottom floor, stopping in a corner of a dimly lit section full of narrow shelves and dusty history books that hadn’t been touched in months, if not years.

“Here we are.”

“Where exactly is this? You know I don’t teach history.”

“No, but we’re exactly where we need to be. The darkest corner in the library. No one, and I mean no one ever comes here.”

“Why is that relevant, Miss Johyun? Is this why you dragged me out here?”

“I’m just looking for a little one-on-one time, professor,” Johyun said, as she shifted her body towards yours, closing the distance a little too much for comfort.

“Johyun-”

Running a hand through her dark jet-black locks she stepped even closer, looking into your eyes. You felt her warm body pressing against yours until your back was resting against the shelves behind you, trapping you with her massive chest. You were quickly finding it harder to resist.

“I’ll have you know I’m not wearing any panties, Professor,” she whispered, and the confession made you weak in the knees.

“I can’t be part of this, whatever it is you’re trying. You’re my student, Johyun. Even if I wanted this we could get caught.”

It wasn’t the first time Johyun tried to seduce you, and it wasn’t going to be the last if she had her way, which she was liable to.

Johyun crashed her lips against yours to silence any additional protesting, her tongue in your mouth was the tipping point.

“Get caught? Maybe that’s the point, professor.”

Breaking the kiss she locked her seductive eyes with you, and in an instant you felt her hand cupping and squeezing your crotch, causing a light gasp to escape from your mouth.

“That is...unless you don’t want this, professor. Then I’ll just go back to studying in my dorm room all alone, and we can forget this ever happened.”

“No, Johyun, I-I didn’t say that.”

“Good,” she said, as she blew hot air in your ear and nibbled on your earlobe, causing your whole body to freeze up in reaction.

“Because I give the best blowjobs...at least that’s what all the other professors have told me,” she said, with a huge devilish smirk.

With one more wanton kiss, Johyun licked your lips and lowered herself down to her knees, running her small hands up your thighs and worked the buckle of your belt, unzipping your pants carefully.

“What am I working with here, professor...” she said, grinning as she yanked your slacks and boxers down around your ankles, exposing your cock and surprised by your size how hard you were for her already.

“Very nice, professor. Who knew you were hiding this?”

Johyun smirked and wrapped her hand around your cock, slowly pumping and running a thumb around your leaking sensitive tip, causing a moan to escape from your lips involuntarily.

“If you don’t want to get caught professor, you should try to be quiet. We’re still in a library,” she said as her lips curled deeper.

Johyun was not in any mood for any buildup, teasing, or anything else that would have stalled what she was about to do. She dove straight and took your hard shaft into the warm embrace of her wet mouth, soft lips wrapping tightly around as they parted, taking another needy groan from you.

You gasped as you felt her warm mouth swallow the entirety of your shaft, a gag reflex non-existent for the vixen named Johyun. She went to town on your dick as her lips slid all the way to your base, deepthroating every inch with ease and bobbed her head, making sure to never take her eyes off your own.

Johyun loosened her tie and tossed it aside, slowly unbuttoning each button of her shirt. Her large supple breasts were partially exposed, barely contained in a sexy almost see-through lace bra that did whatever it could to poorly keep them inside.

With a hand still wrapped around your needy dick, Johyun slobbered on your cock and made you see stars with pleasure, her lips with a firm pressure. Johyun slurped loudly up and down your length, making your whole shaft glistening with her warm saliva and confirming that she was very good at sucking you off.

You needed more of Johyun, and as great as it felt to see her bobbing her head as she worked your cock between your thighs, it was time for something else as you pulled her off your cock and she whined at the emptiness of her mouth.

“Professor…”

Without a word you turned her around, her palms instinctively grabbing onto one of the bookshelves as you bent her body deeply, raising her backside towards you as she presented herself to you. You hiked her grey pleated skirt past her slender waist and she looked back with pleasure as you verified the lack of panties, her round big ass drawn to your attention, unable to focus on anything else.

“What are you waiting for, professor? Put it in me.”

You knew from your classes that Johyun wasn’t patient, but at this time you weren’t either. Especially when the risk of getting caught still existed, at this point it had enhanced the situation.

“Tell me again what you want.”

“Fuck me, professor,” Johyun said, as you lined your cock up with the pink lips of her pretty pussy, the heat of her cunt driving you wild already.

“I couldn’t hear that.”

“Professor...fuck me,” she said, this time her words loud enough for anyone in earshot to hear.

“Again.”

“Fuck. Me. Profess-”

“Ah!”

Before her sentence finished you plunged your cock into her tight pussy, causing her to moan as you felt her slick walls wrapping tightly around your shaft as you filled Johyun with every inch. You gave no time to adjust as you gave initial thrusts, one hand on her hip while the other reached forward to cover her mouth.

“We’re still in a library Miss Johyun, so you should really try to be quiet,” you said, smirking to yourself as you mocked her words from earlier. You worked your hips in a rhythm as they met the soft skin of Johyun’s body, trying to hold back from moaning too loudly as her wet pussy lips coated your cock with her juices as you penetrated her again and again.

“You’re so fucking tight,” you whispered into her ear as you drove your cock deep into her needy tight cunt, watching her thighs jiggle deliciously as you rocked her perfect fit body.

Johyun’s muffled moans did their best to escape as you pounded her tight hole against the dusty shelves. You both shared a moment of panic as you heard a loud sound, realizing it was a book being dropped far enough away that there was no need to worry.

After the false alarm you resumed your movements inside Johyun, the pleasure driving both of you insane. Your pace increased as did the lustful sounds from Johyun’s mouth, even with your hand cupping her mouth she was becoming louder by the second, and soon you gave up on trying to silence her pleasure.

With your hands freed to do what they pleased, you reached around her chest and pulled her massive breasts out of her bra, feeling the softness of them as you squeezed them, trying to run your fingers through every inch of her warm flesh.

“Like my big tits, professor?” Johyun asked, and you only responded by upping your pace even more, pistoning your cock harder into her pussy as you continued to fondle her amazing heavy breasts.

In that very moment the two of you forgot you were in a library, no longer caring about the threat of being caught as you fucked Johyun senseless, both of you moaning together as the harsh sounds of skin slapping against skin grew louder by the second.

“Professor, I’m going to cum!”

“Then fucking cum,” you growled, drilling Johyun’s pussy without a care in the world. You felt her walls clenching tighter and they pulsated around your cock as she drenched your shaft, thighs vibrating as her intense orgasm hit. She moaned freely and gasped with pleasure, and as you fucked her through every last bit of her climax you felt yourself close to arriving at the very destination you drove her to.

“Johyun...I’m going to cum inside you,” you said, repeatedly smacking your hips against her body as your words became faint as a whisper. You weren’t asking for permission but simply stating a fact and Johyun’s eyes lit up as she heard your intention.

“Fill me, professor,” she demanded, and you matched her desires after a handful more of rough thrusts, her warm wet pussy pushing you to your limits as you prepared yourself. You left the comfort of her large warm breasts and held on to her wide hips tightly, burying your cock as deep as it could go as you erupted inside. You flooded her warm tight hole with thick spurts of cum that sent a tidal wave of pleasure with each one, throbbing and groaning with each eruption and filling Johyun to the very brim.

“It’s so warm, professor,” Johyun said, as you rested inside with your cock still deep inside, trying to recover from your intense orgasm.

“There’s more where that came from,” you said, gradually pulling out of her freshly fucked pussy until she was empty, watching your load dripping down those luscious thighs.

“As of now Miss Johyun, office hours are mandatory.”

#berrygood smut #johyun smut #berrygood #johyun #male reader #reader insert #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction

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lesbiansforboromir · 3 years

Note

(I didn’t finish my sentence lmfaoo. I meant I don’t hate the movies portrayal of D B and F’s relationship but I might’ve preferred it in the books ahaha sry my bad lol) yeah that’s kind of an issue with create movies of book, ppl just assume it’s the same cause it’s an adaptation. The books are a Lot too, so ppl might not even wanna bother cause they’re not easy to read vs watching an Adaption of them, so they’ll never know the og characters.

I only rewatch lotr recently after years of growing up with it and tbh I completely forgot that Gondor was a Thing, it rly is just kinda forgettable in the movies.

This is rly making me want to tackle the books lol. The differences are gonna be something to adjust to.

Apart from the Gondor dudes who would you say gets the biggest change? Or worse in your opinion

Oh no I do hate the dynamic of the steward family in the films jdahkjasd Honestly I think this portrayal of abusive parents being just ugly and easily identifiable as villains is somewhat regressive but No worries no worries.

ANd yeah... Gondor really is so forgettable in the films I-

BUT YEAH UM... I guess I can’t say everyone can I um, lets start talking and see how many we get through.

Merry and Pippin got an absolutely tragic reduction in the films. In the books they’re frodo’s friends long before the film, Merry is Frodo’s best friend, he loves Frodo so much he helps him move house and deals with his obnoxious family. Merry actually organises the whole trip, he figures out Frodo intends to leave on his own and secretly organises to go with him JUST because he’s his best friend. He’s like yo, you’ve got something scary you’ve got to do Frodo? Don’t know why you thought we’d let you do it on your own. Merry saves the whole quest by doing this! Frodo would have died before he even got out of the Shire if not for Merry.

Gimli’s portrayal, also a tragedy. Peter Jackson saw dwarf and immediately decided ‘comic relief’, despite the fact that Gimli is more polite than Aragorn or Legolas, is a poet and has one of the longest monologues about art and culture in the whole book. It guts me thinking about it.

Eowyn has a severe reduction in her feelings and character, her monologue is sanitised away from a much more bitter and angry condemnation of her people’s culture around women. We got a more patronising image of her relationship with Merry too.

FRODO, oh god Frodo I’m so sorry, Frodo was clever and masterful and adult and!! He was funny! And sarcastic, he was philosophical and cunning. Films tell you that Merry and Pippin were like thieves, NO Merry and Pippin were very upstanding young gentlemen and Farmer Maggot thought very highly of them both. FRODO is the criminal in this group who stole his mushrooms! Frodo asked questions and made plans and tried to figure things out by himself, he wasn’t this strange melancholic ring box to be ushered places. Frodo saved the world by TAKING the ring’s power on mount doom after planning how to do that and cursing gollum to essentially drop the ring into the mountain of fire LIKE. Frodo had agency! SAM TOO fsfdgsdfgs I skip frodo and sam’s scenes in the films but i love them in the books.

Aragorn and Gandalf are vastly different characters in the films in that they’re likable. And this is... better for Aragorn I think. Although I miss him being a little more snarky and self important and sharp, but it’s better than Aragorn’s likable which he thoroughly isn’t in the books in my opinion. I MEAN... he’s- he’s very complex in the books and there are likable moments amongst him snapping at people and talking about himself. But for Gandalf I think it was a thorough detriment. Which hurts, love Ian Mckellen, that’s my grandad, but Gandalf was like genuinely manipulative in the books and literally could not stand being wrong despite being wrong quite a lot. Constantly Gandalf will angrily and rudely snap at people who rightly critisise his choices (Boromir for one) and this is good because you don’t want an infallible morally irreproachable dad for this whole adventure. It’s much more interesting this way.

Eomer, miss him being a little more young and fiery and a little out of his depth but proud and confident even so. Like I know Karl Urban was exactly 27 in the films but he felt very world weary and kind of ‘I’ve had it’ when he’d only just become Third Marshall like barely a year ago. AND OF COURSE, this is compounded by the way Theodred’s death is portrayed like... askjdas like oops! Our 18 year old prince just died in this lil stream in this small lil battle huh weird- NO!! Theodred was 41!! And had died in a MASSIVE battle against Isengard! He was assassinated in fact, the whole point of the battle was to assassinate Theodred because he’d been so influential to maintaining Rohan’s stability despite all Grima and Saruman’s efforts. Eomer was a man who’d just lost a mentor, an adopted elder brother! Anyway...

Um... honourable mention for Hama... our dear doorward... miss you being relevant and telling Aragorn to fuck off babe. Farmer Maggot, miss you being relevant and like the literal best. Haldir, miss you NOT being relevant dwarfist bastard but I love to watch you die. Galadriel and Celeborn, not enough she pegs him energy, not enough of her being scary and unknowable, not enough of her laughing. Bilbo! I’m sorry they didn’t let you go back to the Lonely Mountain that’s miserable my guy.... Gollum’s alright... I think that’s everyone who exists in the films and books both.

So this still ended up as everyone :)

#chats #when I say I could complain about every scene in the films I could not be more serious #Anonymous #asks

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kadwrites · 4 years

Text

a little tipsy | T.S

summary; the reader always gets in trouble when she gets tipsy but this time , she was lucky.

warning; its a fluff, maybe tommy is out of character ? idk and maybe some grammar mistakes , I literally wrote this while i was in class so there is that

word count; 1507

author’s note; nursing school is sort of stressful and I seem to only write when im stressed so.. ,btw I wrote this for @captivatedbycillianmurphy i feel like i owe them, I hope you guys like it! please tell me what you think of it.

she sat at the bar , watching her friends sing and dance while she drank her regular drink, these nights out were not her favorite but seeing her friends laugh made her feel happy. but the moment she saw him entering ,she lowered her gaze and faced forward.

she knew him , like everyone did , she works at a nearby bookstore and when she's done she comes here to help harry , her dad's friend. she would see him everyday but she never talked to him , she would try to pretend like he didn't exist, why? she doesn't even know.

the moment she's done , she'll just hurry to get out but today seemed like she is stuck ,its still early so her friends will refuse to go home and she has to stay and make sure they won't get in trouble.

"it's okay , he is just a guy." she whispered to her self , or so she thought

"yeah , I'm just a guy relax." he smirked and she felt as if her soul left her body.

he is way closer than she thought he was , she peaked slowly to find him still looking at her .

"I'm actually not that bad once you forget the whole gangster thing." he joked

"yeah, I bet." she said meekly, the words of her friend keeps echoing in her head.

"you have a crush on tommy !! aww , thats so cute.!"

"no , I don't " she said as she was organizing the books.

"you do , it's fine , it's natural" she sighed "he is very dreamy so no one blames you"

"no one will blame me because I have no feelings towards that man whatsoever."

"you said 'whatsoever' ,thats you shoving your tongue down his throat in your language"

"what's your name?" he asked

"y/n" she answered , she doesn't know why would he want to know , because honestly she isn't that interesting compared to , well , anyone.

she downed her third glass , she isn't drunk but she is more confident now, she thinks.

"your friends seem to be having fun, why aren't you with them?."

"your brothers are having fun too and I don't see you there."

he was somehow shocked but mostly amused

"you really don't want me around you."

she faced him "my mom really doesn't approve the fact that you exist but I don't mind"

"you work at the bookstore ,don't you?"

"I do"

"why?"

"not a lot of people go there."

"you work in a bookstore to avoid people?"

she nodded and downed her fourth glass , she is a bit tipsy.

"I wish it was this easy for me"

"with a face like yours ? I don't people would leave you alone"

he smiled " I hope that's a compliment "

"It is , your face is like drugs to women"

"your very honest"

"I'm tipsy"

"I like you better when you actually talk"

"I would've never talked to you without a bit of alcohol in my system"

"why is that?"

“take a wild guess” she says as she nods at the group of giggling girls that were obviously talking about him.

he chuckled at her , his smile growing “ I don’t see how that would be relevant”

“um , I feel like I might get stabbed if I talked to you” she glanced at the group of girls once more “ oh , if looks could kill”

he was laughing now , she watched and giggled to herself.

“I made him laugh!” she thought to herself and was feeling a ridiculous sense of pride .

she turned to look at her friends that she forgot about and she was shocked to see them gone except one who was about to leave

“pardon me , I need to do something” she walked away before he could even answer.

“sara , where are the rest ?” she said as she cursed herself for forgetting about them.

“oh , don’t worry! laura’s brother drove them home and I will be walking home” she patted y/n shoulder gently “ I am sober and my house is 5 minutes away , you can stay with your date” she said and wiggled her brows.

“fuck off” she smiled as she hugged her friend goodbye.

“you are an amazing friend , my own brothers wouldn’t be worried about me like that” he was standing behind her now.

she jumped at the wound of his voice “it seems to me as if your brothers are done with your shit”.

“they are” he smiled at her

“I am tipsy and my friends left so I should get going too” she said as she looked at her feet

“ can I walk you home?” he asked as he held the door open for her.

“I didn’t peg you as a gentleman , no offense”

“what? offense taken very personally”

“ I didn’t peg you as a dramatic person either” she giggled as he scoffed

he offered his arm as they walked , she gladly accepted.

“you are not as rude and cold as I thought you would be.” she admitted

“I am, you just are not someone I want to be rude and cold with” his voice was soft and warm , almost out of character.

“so , you are a bitch but not to me?”

“what can I say, it is a piety thing really , you break my heart.”

he threw his head back , laughing when she shoved him, he was back at her side in a few seconds , gently taking her hand in his. she felt as if god finally wanted her to be happy but then she looked up to see her house

“well , this is it,” she said , voice laced with disappointment

“goodnight,”

“you know , I do feel like I want to sober up a bit,” she was already walking past her house,

he smiled and just walked by her, a few minutes later they were back at her doorstep

“goodnight , thomas,”

“goodnight ,” he kissed the back of her hand, she just stared at his eyes for a few seconds smiling and then entering the house.

,in the following morning , y\n was regretting every decision she ever made , she didn’t even drink that much but her body hated her nonetheless .

she laid in her bed , holding the hand the tommy held yesterday and thinking of ways to keep her hands dry and how to never wash them again.

“good morning!” laura barged in y\n room as if it was her own, jumping on the bed beside her friend, y\n just groaned and tried to ignore laura’s existence.

“ I half expected to see a naked tommy deity in your bed.” she giggled

“keep praying , god might listen to you.”she was half asleep.

her moms yelling woke her up “darling! get up! there is a....guest waiting for you.”

the pausing made y\n open an eye and look at her friend , they both seemed to think the same thing

laura pulled y\n and pushed her into the bathroom

“change and freshen up , your mom never pauses so its either our sex deity or satan” she closed the door on her friend.

laura stood by the door and then helped her half asleep friend change and look somewhat alive.

“I swear if it isn’t him , I will murder you.”

“just thank me when he’ll get you a nice diamond ring” she told her friend as they walked down the stairs and into the living room. y/n was scoffing when the sight of tommy awkwardly sipping tea as your mom stared at him,

“oh, wonderful ! just make yourself at home dear , y/n be polite with your guest” her mom got up the moment that she walked in and just left the room with laura

“your mom doesn’t like me at all”

y\n smiled “why are you here ? not that I mind” she sat beside him on the sofa

“I wanted to check on you” he sipped the tea almost shyly.

“I am good , my head feels like it might explode but other than that I am peachy” she sighed

“ you weren’t even drunk” he looked at her ,

“I was drunk enough to get you to like me” she winked at him and he laughed

“are you still drunk?”

“I might be” she shrugged and he smiled , again.

“I will take you out on a date tonight” he demanded

“you know , gentlemen ask for things like dates” she raised a brow

“fine” he cleared his throat “would you like to go on a date with me?”

“I would love to go out with you , thomas” she smiled , then she leaned and gave him a very gentle kiss on his cheek

thomas is not a soft person, but the moment that her lips touched his cheek , he felt himself melt and he doesn’t mind that at all.

#kadwrites #thomas shelby x reader #tommy shelby x reader #thomas shelby imagine #tommy shelby imagine

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mittensmorgul · 3 years

Text

Since the finale aired, I’ve been yammering on about how it would’ve only worked as a finale to s2, and now that I’m actually rewatching s2, I stand by that even more staunchly. The finale doesn’t work in a post-s2 supernatural universe.

This is the version of Dean we saw in the finale-- the one whose only mission in life was to Save Sammy, to help him get his revenge and allow him to go out and live a Normal Safe Life pretending that hunting and monsters don’t exist. The one who just wanted some pie, to drive his car, and had no real connections beyond Sam in the world outside of Bobby. Even Dean’s characterization in the finale is this far younger Dean who’d never allowed himself to crack open and truly understand love. It would take me years to plow through everything I’ve ever written about him as a character and his long struggle to emotional maturity we saw evolve over the next 13 years beyond this episode, but the tl;dr will always be “this s2 Dean is the same as the Dean in the finale.”

The goal of s2 was saving SAM from his “destiny,” too. In this era of the show, Dean didn’t have a “destiny” the same way Sam did. The ONLY thing that mattered was freeing Sam from “becoming evil,” and being manipulated into terrible things. What Dean wanted, what he was “destined” for by the narrative was irrelevant, because all of his choices and emotional burdens were tied only to saving Sam. To freeing Sam so he could safely return to his “normal life.” Go back to college, have a family and the white picket fence life.

This was before Dean truly began fighting for HIMSELF. Which only really and truly began after he sells his soul to resurrect Sam. That’s when Dean truly begins fighting for himself. Sure, he’s angry with John during s2 for trading his own life for Dean’s, for putting the burden of “if you can’t save Sam, you’ll have to kill him” on his shoulders with his dying breath, but Dean is still fighting against John’s authority and the complicated tangle of feelings of his own childhood and not actually coming to terms with his own wants and needs and wishes out beyond that yet. He’s still unwittingly confronting the “destiny” John had set up for him, and hasn’t moved beyond that yet. It’s only trading his soul for Sam’s that finally brings Dean into the cosmic narrative that will fuel his introspection and personal growth for the rest of the series.

And out beyond that point, his entire character arc explodes into orbit.

Dean’s entire character arc in s3 is confronting this very basic fact: he doesn’t deserve to have been sacrificed just to save Sam. He doesn’t deserve that burden, and he does deserve to live. This is the realization he comes to before eventually being dragged to Hell and then rescued by an angel, who literally tells him, “you don’t think you deserve to be saved” in the aftermath of that. From that point on, we have TWELVE SEASONS of Dean struggling with what he “deserves” versus what is “fate” and “destiny” and eventually confronting what he WANTS if he truly could choose his own destiny.

Plus, out beyond that point, he has Cas. And nothing changes Dean, pushes him to grow and understand himself, and accept himself-- all of himself, from the good to the horrific-- than the pure and unflinching acceptance of Castiel. Cas never looked at him and said “you are evil,” or “you are worthless.” (well, they’ve both said some pretty awful stuff to each other over the years, but there was either brainwashing or other deeper issues pushing those things on them, and they have ALWAYS eventually come back to one another, and the awful stuff was dealt with). Point is, Dean and Cas both began running these parallel arcs of duty versus desire, and for Dean, the duty was always framed around “taking care of Sam” versus pursuing any sort of ambition or goals for himself. They would fight for this for most of the rest of the series, until eventually the goal for ALL of them would be about discovering what they would want for themselves.

The show explicitly dealt with this, repeatedly, over later seasons, asking all of the characters the big questions: is this what you would choose for yourself? What WOULD you choose for yourself if you could?

And then they made the narrative of the final season, of the final Big Bad, the fact that they had NEVER had real freedom, and that their entire lives (and the entire history of not only this universe but every parallel universe) had been Chuck’s Puppet Theater, and true free will had been a lie all this time. Pushing all of the characters to confront their own choices and understand what about who they were as people was separate from what Chuck pushed them into choosing and doing all these years. The main thing that Dean (and also Cas, and to the extent she was included in the narrative this was Eileen’s issue as well) were being pushed to come to terms with what really was real, and were their feelings and choices their own or imposed on them for the furtherance of Chuck’s story.

At the end of the road, finally free and out from under Chuck’s control, they knew what was real. For Sam and Eileen, they had chosen each other. Cas had chosen Dean, but Dean hadn’t yet had a chance to reply, but anyone with two eyes and a brain knows what he would’ve said in return. It’s what Cas stopped him from saying even back in Purgatory in 15.09. And yet, for some reason Sam and Dean forgot all of that, as if none of it had ever even really happened at all, and we went right back to who they were right after they finally defeated the YED, before we even knew Azazel had a name, let alone the fact that the ultimate boogeyman of their entire lives to that point had been nothing more than a fanatic pawn in a much larger destiny for both of them.

The end of s2 was the last time Dean sacrificing himself so Sam could have a normal life, where Dean really felt there was nothing more for himself than fulfilling his father’s orders to save Sammy, even feels remotely plausible. It’s the last time we can feel like Dean might find peace and contentment in a Heaven where John is nearby to be proud of him, and where Dean would actually feel like that validation was even relevant to his own life.

And that finally brings me back to s2, where that was actually addressed through John’s self-sacrifice to save Dean, to serve Dean up to the narrative and provide a stage for this self-transformative journey INTO being a version of John himself. Only... Dean DOESN’T choose that. He fights to save Sam at all costs, even when it seems clear that the right answer would probably be to KILL Sam instead. When not only the ghost of John Winchester plaguing Dean’s mind would make him doubt his own drive to save his brother, but the John Winchester Insert Character of s2-- Gordon Walker-- basically put Dean’s own doubts out there in plain words in 2.10:

GORDON: I'm surprised at you, Dean. Getting all emotional. I'd heard you were more of a professional than this. Look, let's say you were cruising around in that car of yours and, uh, you had little Hitler riding shotgun, right? Back when he was just some goofy, crappy artist. But you knew what he was going to turn into someday. You'd take him out, no questions, am I right?

DEAN: That's not Sam.

GORDON: Yes it is. You just can't see it yet. Dean, it's his destiny. Look, I'm sympathetic. He's your brother, you love the guy. This has got to hurt like hell for you. But here's the thing. It would wreck him. But your dad? If it really came right down to it, he would have had the stones to do the right thing here. But you're telling me you're not the man he is?

This, the episode where Dean finally confesses John’s final orders to Sam, where Dean has decided that saving Sam is all that matters, even when circumstance and everyone else is practically screaming at him that this could all be over if only he gave in-- be it his own self-sacrifice OR killing Sam. Six of one, half a dozen of the other, the universe doesn’t care (and neither does Chuck... especially at this point... and the proof of that is Sam’s s15 nightmares where one of Chuck’s alternate universe endings for Sam and Dean was Sam actually going Darkside on demon blood and killing Dean... any iteration of the old drama, Chuck has explored all potential endings-- oh, except the ending where TFW gets to just be happy and live... that’s the one ending they never get and the only one they deserved in the end).

also from 2.10... loads of chat about “destiny” and one of Dean’s first “we should just lay all this shit down and take a vacation” moments when he suggests they go to Amsterdam and enjoy some of the not-coffee-coffee-shops, which Sam counters by doubling down on the fact that Dean has a destiny in all this as much as Sam does:

SAM: Well, come on, dude, you're a hunter. I mean, it's what you were meant to do.

DEAN: Ah, I wasn't meant to do anything, I don't believe in that destiny crap.

SAM: You mean you don't believe in my destiny.

DEAN: Yeah, whatever.

SAM: Look, Dean, I've tried running before. I mean, I ran all the way to California and look what happened. You can't run from this. And you can't protect me.

DEAN: I can try.

And that’s it, right there. This is the “neither of you can try for a normal life outside of the other while the other is still alive.” This is Sam pinning a destiny to Dean that’s just as inescapable within Chuck’s narrative as Sam’s demon blood and psychic powers.

This is the core essence of Chuck’s story about them. The sibling dynamic that Chuck failed to free himself from, and that Sam and Dean failed to free themselves from after Chuck’s demise in 15.19.

Destiny. One must die so the other can live.

And considering the next 13 seasons of the show and the long and emotionally grueling character arcs Sam and Dean proceed through where they truly confront the core of who they are as people-- as individuals outside of their duty and destiny-- the finale ceases to make any sense outside of Chuck’s narrative for them. If 15.20 really happened exactly as we saw it on screen, then Chuck still won.

And they had to loop Sam and Dean all the way back to where they were emotionally at the end of s2 in order to make it seem plausible. Which, for those of us who actually care about what they endured after s2, makes the finale entirely implausible as a whole.

#spn 2.10 #spn 15.20 #spiders georg of the tnt loop #while i was writing this up i also watched 2.11 and yep... still holds up #the ghost of john winchester #chuck's process

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bestworstcase · 3 years

Text

tired of ‘it doesn’t make sense for cass to trust zhan tiri’ takes

cass is a cautious person with a good instinct for danger which yes means that for most of the show she is indeed the ignored voice of reason saying ‘hey this OBVIOUSLY SKETCHY situation is sketch’ YES

but

in the latter half of 2 she is mutilated by her friend, blamed for it, made to apologize for her own injury, denied any space to feel hurt or upset or angry about this, and literally told ‘you should know we never listen to you!’ when she gets mad about yet another instance of her saying ‘this seems sus’ only for them to literally walk out on her mid-sentence without even acknowledging that she’s speaking.

cass tries again and again to communicate her feelings and every single time she’s brushed off or scolded or belittled by her friends. her friends have so little respect for her that by the time they hit the hoyt the aren’t even pretending anymore. this hurts her, terribly

then - ok listen. take off the ‘zhan tiri is a horrible evil monster’ goggles put aside your entrenched preconceived biases against this character for a minute.

what is the first thing zhan tiri does when cassandra meets her?

cassandra hears a voice calling her name. following it leads her here, to a disembodied (disemwalled?) door in some sort of enchanted forest. this is one of those obviously sketchy situations that instantly puts cassandra on her guard: she draws her sword while getting her bearings.

[sidebar: those light-and-dark green swirls on the forest floor look an awful lot like the clouds in the lost realm, don’t they?]

then:

ZHAN TIRI: There you are, Cassandra!

[Cassandra looks around, sees Blue, and lowers her sword slightly in confusion. Blue approaches her.]

ZHAN TIRI: I’d nearly given up on you.

CASSANDRA: [shaken] Who- who are you?

ZHAN TIRI: A friend. Or, at least—I’d like to be.

cass at this point is baffled but still on her guard - she holds her sword in a low guard and she’s physically leaning away from the unsettling ghost child.

more important here is zhan tiri’s opening gambit. ‘a friend, or at least i’d like to be.’ she’s dodging the question of what her name is, yes. but also the second part of that statement implies a correction of the first, an acknowledgement that they are not friends and becoming friends is contingent on whether cassandra accepts her overtures of friendship; there is, in saying ‘at least i’d like to be,’ an implication of acknowledgement of and respect for cassandra’s personal boundaries. this is not something cassandra has ever experienced before. contrast it with rapunzel’s aggressive, domineering pursuit of cassandra’s friendship in beginnings.

continuing:

ZHAN TIRI: Come.

[She leads Cassandra away from the door, deeper into the enchanted forest. Though hesitant, Cassandra sheathes her sword and follows.]

CASSANDRA: Wherever you’re taking me had better have a blonde princess.

note how the blank confusion on cassandra’s face hardens into a glare the instant zhan tiri says something that could be construed as a command. cassandra has two years worth of experience in the minefield that is friendship with someone in a position of authority and power over her so of course she bristles at this. i think it is also not coincidental that she refers to rapunzel in response.

but there is also a second dynamic at work here. for two years cassandra’s whole life has been locked into orbit around the blinding sun of rapunzel, and even before then by nature of her existence in the palace as a young girl only a little older than the lost princess she would have spent her childhood in the shadow of a child who wasn’t even present. zhan tiri is the first person cassandra has ever met who is flat out indifferent to rapunzel’s existence. even in vardaros, where cass was better liked by the populace than rapunzel, the people still focused on rapunzel - they disliked her, and they cared enough to make sure she knew it.

but zhan tiri does not give a single fuck about rapunzel. she ignores cassandra’s attempt to make rapunzel relevant to this conversation. she called out for cassandra. she has been waiting for cassandra. she has something she wants to show cassandra. she wants to be cassandra’s friend. rapunzel just...doesn’t matter to her, but cassandra does. and that is disarming, both in the figurative and literal sense. so cass puts her sword away and goes to see whatever it is that this strange child wants to share with her.

[They reach the forest’s edge and enter the memory. Cassandra is startled, struck by the familiarity of this new setting.]

CASSANDRA: This place... feels familiar?

[Blue takes her by the hand and leads her into the cottage. She remains silent, allowing Cassandra to take it all in, until Baby Cass enters with her music box.]

ZHAN TIRI: Do you recognize that child?

[Her prompting makes it click for Cass that she’s watching herself as a child.]

again, set aside your knowledge that zhan tiri is an evil villain and your instinctive distrust of everything she says and just... take a look at this screenshot. what does it look like if you take what zhan tiri says in this sequence at face value?

this is a horrible memory. zhan tiri knows precisely what it entails, because she is the one who dredged it out of cassandra’s mind and set it up for her to experience again. cassandra, however, has only just recognized her younger self and has no idea what’s coming. it’s going to hurt her so badly when she remembers everything—but this is an experience she needs to confront in order to heal from the damage it did to her. so much of her suffering can be traced back to this defining, forgotten moment of her childhood.

we the audience know that zhan tiri doesn’t care, doesn’t have any real interest in genuinely helping cassandra, isn’t revealing this memory to her out of the goodness of her heart - but all cassandra knows is that this is a strange ghost who expressed a desire to be friends and has brought her here to, apparently, show her a childhood memory she forgot. so erase your audience knowledge from your brain for a second and look at zhan tiri’s expression here.

she looks weary. sad, even. she looks like someone who truly values cassandra’s wellbeing, who knows that reliving this memory is going to hurt, who’s showing it to cassandra anyway because she thinks cassandra deserves to know and she understands that this is the root cause of cassandra’s pain and that in order to grow and heal it must be seen, it must be acknowledged, it must be examined.

and that is the impression of zhan tiri’s character that cassandra walks away from this experience with. someone who saw her, and saw her pain, and saw the deep festering forgotten wound of this memory buried under layers of repression and denial, and gently unpeeled those layers and brought that wound to light, because she knew cass couldn’t heal from it if she didn’t know it was there.

moving on:

[Baby Cass approaches Gothel with the music box, only to be coldly brushed off.]

CASSANDRA: ...That’s my...

ZHAN TIRI: Mother, yes. It is.

[Skipping transcription of the remainder of the flashback; what matters is that Blue exists the scene at this point. She isn’t just standing quietly in the corner; she is fully gone, leaving Cassandra by herself to experience the rest of the memory.]

again - obviously zhan tiri knows what happens in this memory, but that isn’t the point. by staying just long enough to help cassandra put this memory into context and then leaving, she gives cassandra complete privacy to process what she is seeing and feel whatever emotional reactions she has to it and express those feelings openly, without any of the reservations she might have about having a breakdown in front of a ghost she met a few minutes ago.

again, contrast this to the way rapunzel treats cass. in under raps, when cassandra tells rapunzel that she’s dealing with ‘some stuff’ and asks rapunzel to wait until she’s ready to share, rapunzel’s response is to stalk her. in RATGT, cass tells rapunzel that she feels disrespected and unwanted and rapunzel brushes her off. in RDO, when cass is mad because rapunzel’s reckless choices resulted in cassandra’s hand being mutilated, rapunzel is furious and backs cassandra into a corner in an attempt to force her to share her feelings and then get over it so things can go back to normal.

how soothing, then, must zhan tiri’s quiet departure must be for cass? how comforting, how much of a relief must it be to have this new person recognize by herself that cassandra needs a moment alone and give that to her without cass even needing to ask?

there is, i think, a direct line of causation between zhan tiri exiting this scene and cassandra crying for the first time in the entire series afterwards while zhan tiri comforts her. cass doesn’t cry, right? even when she thinks rapunzel is going to be trapped as a bird forever, she stops herself from crying. she doesn’t cry when her hand is burnt in the great tree, not even from physical pain. she doesn’t cry in RDO.

but zhan tiri is the only person in the whole series who shows consideration for cassandra’s emotional boundaries, so when cassandra is upset after reliving this memory, she freely allows herself to cry, and she lets zhan tiri comfort her.

because it’s safe. so much blame is heaped upon cass for not being more open with rapunzel, but the thing is - a) cassandra is a lot more open with rapunzel than most of the fandom gives her credit for, and b) rapunzel is not a safe person for cassandra to be emotionally open with because she tramples boundaries, doesn’t listen, routinely chooses to hear only what she wants to hear, and never acknowledges or apologizes for any of the hurt this causes cass.

which segues us into this:

ZHAN TIRI: I’m sorry that happened to you, Cassandra. Sometimes the most painful truths are the most difficult to remember. You’ve always felt outshined by Rapunzel, haven’t you? And you always will, unless...

in this statement, zhan tiri:

1 - expresses sympathy for the trauma cass suffered

2 - empathizes with the pain she feels right now

3 - connects the dots between her past trauma and present angst

4 - verbalizes her fear that this pattern will never change

and

5 - offers to help.

zhan tiri is, once again, the only character in the whole series who does these things. in s1, rapunzel does occasionally try to be emotionally supportive of cassandra - under raps and big brothers of corona are the big examples here - but the way she goes about it tends to do more harm than good. in UR she runs roughshod over cassandra’s clearly stated boundaries and continually escalates to the point of actual literal stalking; in BBoC she utterly disregards cassandra’s statements vis a vis how rapunzel can help in favor of doing a bunch of other things that rapunzel thinks cass should want, and in the process she actively interferes with cassandra’s rest and makes her recovery experience worse.

in contrast, zhan tiri gets it. she is absolutely correct in her perception of the situation: cassandra has been trapped in this pattern of inferiority to rapunzel her whole life. her mother abandoned her for rapunzel, and everyone in her life now is willing to sacrifice cassandra’s needs, her feelings, her physical health on the altar of Rapunzel’s Destiny, and that will never change if she continues on as she has been. and... if cass tried to simply leave, by herself, do you really, truly, honestly think rapunzel would let her go?

she feels trapped because she is trapped, and she’s desperate for a way out, and zhan tiri sees that, understands that, and most important of all, shows her a way out.

so like

when she walked through that door in the house of yesterday’s tomorrow cassandra was a heap of emotional pain and unfulfilled emotional needs—for respect, for compassion, for basic consideration of her boundaries, for someone to see how much she’s hurting, for space to feel things without being asked to sacrifice more of herself for somebody else, for someone to care about her and what she needs and thinks and feels and wants, for an escape from the toxic inescapable dumpster fire of her life—and in the space of maybe a couple hours zhan tiri answered every. single. one.

cassandra entered this situation expecting trouble, and instead she got someone treating her with dignity and compassion for the first time ever sO OF COURSE CASSANDRA TRUSTS HER!!

it beggars belief that the show expects me to believe she never bothered to ask what her new friend’s name was between this point and OAH, and yes, if cass were in a healthier place or surrounded by less toxic people then i’m sure she’d be more inclined to be suspicious of the weird little ghost child who reached into her head and pulled out a suppressed memory. but nevertheless it does, in fact, make sense for cass to conclude after this experience that blue is trustworthy and really does care about her and is a better friend to her than rapunzel.

tts was allergic to acknowledging the legitimacy of cassandra’s grievances in any way after s2 and refused to allow zhan tiri even a modicum of depth as a character so the vast majority of their relationship exists off-screen, which is, yes, deeply frustrating and does a huge disservice to both characters and to the overarching plot of the season. but “why would cass trust her?” is a question the series answers, on screen, in spades.

#rta #cassandra #zhan tiri #long post #it sure does suck for cass that her first taste of what an equitable friendship is like #comes from a horrible evil demon who doesn't care about her and is just stringing her along in order to use her #and then none of her actual friends apologize for treating her like DIRT after said demon stabs her in the back #like good fucking lord no wonder she left at the end #anyway as always i say 'morally complex zhan tiri who actually gives a damn about cassandra' rights

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iamanartichoke · 3 years

Text

[please blacklist spoiler tags: #loki tv series spoilers, #loki series spoilers, #loki spoilers]

Yes, I did just watch episode 2 at 5:30 in the morning.

No, I am not sorry. Not at the moment, although when I inevitably crash later this afternoon, I will be.

Just some very, very quick - and scattered and messy - thoughts: That is a straight up lie; they’re definitely scattered and messy but not very quick at all.

Under the cut for spoilers and length.

I’m going to start with Loki’s characterization. My honest opinion is that Loki’s overall characterization feels like a fic characterization. He definitely is not Avengers Loki, like, at all. I don't know if Tom just, like, forgot how to play that Loki or ...?? That, or Loki was so much more mind-controlled than we realized and getting hulk-smashed just completely reset him back to zero but also fucked him up a little bit and affected his personality, kind of like how some people completely develop weird new personality quirks after a traumatic brain injury.

… yeah, I think that’s where I’m gonna land for now. TV series!Loki feels like a more-or-less canon version of Loki, but if that Loki got hit in the head really hard and now he’s just a little bit fucked up but overall no worse for the wear. Which - it may be that it’s so early in the morning, but that’s actually really fucking funny to me, lmao. God, I kill me. It’s not funny.

No, but, that’s pretty much how I feel. He’s ooc but he’s also ic, and the reason I’m not particularly bothered by the inconsistency, for lack of a better word, is because that’s what pretty much every fic Loki already feels like to me? (Including my own, so I’m not, like, saying that in a derogatory way.) Which is why I say Loki feels like a fic!Loki and to try to explain it better - there is always, for me, a little suspension of disbelief that I employ when I read fic. The reason for that is because the context, the plot, and the dynamics of the fic are usually pretty different than what we ever get in canon, so it becomes a matter of taking film!Loki and, like, bending him a bit in order to fit him into the perimeters of the fic.

The result ends up being that I don’t see the exact Avengers!Loki or TDW!Loki, and thus by definition the portrayal is ooc, but the version that I do see feels like a genuine extension of the canon version, possessing enough of Loki’s overall traits and characteristics that he feels authentic, albeit a bit pretzeled for the new context.

I honestly think that’s something that’s unavoidable, just due to the fact that in fic - and now, in this series - there are a lot more variables at play than there are in the films, wherein Loki is not just a supporting character but also the villain/antagonist and is therefore very limited in what he does/what the narrative allows him to do. When those limitations are taken away, what are we going to see? Probably a lot of different things, and yeah, a lot of them are going to feel a little ooc. And, like in fic, even if the characterization mostly lands, there are definitely bits and pieces (some fics more than others lean this way) where the author didn’t stick the landing or got carried away or otherwise probably forgot for a while that they were writing Loki, not their own OC.

That’s the point where it strays into cringe territory for me (and where the ‘heh, he’s Loki but with a brain injury’ aspect comes in), but while I had to consciously decide to just ignore those moments, overall the tone in this episode felt a bit more balanced between the new, the old, and the cringe, and less whiplash-y from the beginning of the episode to the end.

… I have no idea if that makes sense, but what I’m basically saying is that while I am enjoying this version of Loki, I do recognize all of the ways he’s ooc but, unlike how I feel about Ragnarok!Loki, the ooc-ness feels genuine and unavoidable rather than just a fundamental and careless misunderstanding of the character altogether. In other words, I feel like any ooc-ness here is happening despite the writers taking care to do their best, and isn’t just a result of Loki being lazily written by a person or persons who just doesn’t want to bother with him at all.

Again, I don’t know if that makes sense, but fuck it, there we are and I’m moving on.

I liked all of the little details, including again, things that felt straight out of fic, like Loki asking Mobius why he has the jetski magazine. (Also, if any of my thorki friends read this, was I the only one who noticed that when we see Loki reading the magazine, it just happens to be open to a page with a picture featuring a jet skier who looks like Thor? l.m.a.o.)

Loki interrupting things to explain the difference between illusions vs the other power (I can’t remember which one, off hand, and if I stop writing to go look it up I will lose my train of thought and not finish this) was great, but his overall input and contributions to the missions inspired very mixed feelings for me. On the one hand, I loved that the narrative, via Loki, is reminding us of all these things that he’s capable of that the films generally left out or brushed aside or ignored - but, every time he spoke, he was met with eye rolls and sighs and just a general feeling of “someone please shut this guy up” and I didn’t like the narrative treating him that way.

But also, it’s understandable bc none of the people on his team are actually on his team. None of them want him there (story of Loki’s fucking life), none of them trust him, and none of them are particularly interested in hearing what he has to say. So it’s like, I understand why they reacted the way they did, and I don’t think their reactions are meant to support an overall narrative undermining of Loki’s skills and input - but, the tone is hard to read for me bc I am very defensive and protective of Loki. I can’t quite determine the line between the TVA agents being unreliable narrators (ie, they’re annoyed by Loki bc of who he is to them, but that doesn’t mean the audience is supposed to feel the same) and the TVA agents validating that Loki is just being a nuisance (and, thus, the audience is supposed to feel the same).

That is, I know how I am consuming the narrative (that they’re unreliable narrators), but I’m not sure if that’s how tptb are intending for me to consume the narrative - and I guess it doesn’t really matter, but it’s worth mentioning.

In general, I really liked, again, Loki existing in his own space and watching the way he carried himself. I especially found it interesting that his hands were almost always in his pockets - for one thing it's a stance I tend to imagine him taking often in fic, but also it’s kind of a weird choice bc pockets don’t seem to be a thing in Asgardian clothing. It makes me feel like Loki is the kind of person who never knows what to do with his hands but is always conscious of them, as is common among anxious and self-conscious people, and I just find that relatable on a weird level.

I am really kinda torn on Mobius in this episode; when not interrogating Loki, he’s much less antagonistic toward Loki and therefore I’m more inclined to take-him-or-leave-him but I’ll go ahead and take him I guess. Yet at the same time, bc he’s not interrogating Loki he’s also not trying to put on a show for Loki and when you take that away, he really doesn’t seem to like Loki at all. It supports that Mobius only wants what Loki can do for him and doesn’t actually particularly care about him as a person, which is fine and more or less what I figured, but it contributes to me not really being able to decide how I feel about him in general. Idk, though, I kinda like their dynamic? Like I want them to end up friends?

Regardless, Tom and Owen have amazing chemistry and it’s really funny to me bc (not to be a jerk) I honestly didn’t know Owen Wilson could act. Like, I’ve never seen him in a role where he wasn’t just playing Owen Wilson. So for him to not only be playing Mobius so well but also having such chemistry and a sense of holding-his-own against Tom Hiddleston is like, color me surprised but pleasantly so.

I like B-15 a lot, even though she obviously hates Loki, so idk why I like her but I do. I like Renslayer less, but meh. (Side note - when I was in undergrad in Syracuse, I took the Amtrak from Syracuse to Boston and back more than a few times, for reasons that aren’t relevant, and that route always had a layover at Albany-Rensselaer and every single time I see Renslayer’s name, I want to call her Rensselaer instead.) Shout out to the guest appearance by Casey, sorry Loki stole your juice lmfao.

The moments from the trailer that were very cringe were less so in context (though still kinda cringe, tbh). I think we’ve seen most of the content from the trailers in the first two episodes now, though, which means going forward, it’s going to be like 95% previously unseen material (aside from the brief apocalyptic shots and so forth).

One thing I fucking loved was how Loki, reading about Ragnarok, was visibly affected and even teared up a bit, and you could tell he was in his feels about it, but then later when Mobius expresses sympathy, Loki is just like, “Uh huh, very sad, but anyway.” It was a subtle (well maybe not that subtle) but effective way to remind us that what Loki presents to other people is more often than not a mask and he keeps his true feelings close to the chest. It makes last week’s breakdown have even more of an impact, I think, bc clearly Loki was at the end of his rope to allow himself to show that much raw emotion and vulnerability, but also - for me - there’s a niggling little doubt there that wasn’t there before, in that there was probably more performance in it than I thought.

By which I mean, I think his reaction to the film of his life when he was alone was genuine but, while I previously thought his admission to Mobius later was also genuine, I now think was probably half genuine and half performative. I know others already figured that out, but I’m a little slow and, also, I don’t mind changing my opinion and interpretation from week to week.

Along the same lines, I wasn’t exactly surprised to see that Loki is “undercover” in the TVA, but it was nice to see it acknowledged fairly quickly. Not sure I buy that Loki wants to overthrow and rule the TVA - it’s still a little too “Loki only wants a throne” for me, but again, just because that’s what he told the variant doesn’t mean that’s actually what he’s after.

And, finally, I like the variant, I love Loki’s reaction to seeing her, and while I realize that the show has acknowledged Loki’s gender fluidity and we’re meant to assume that Lady Loki (I guess? Not sure if we’re going with that or not here) is Loki, I saw a theory somewhere about how this is actually not Loki-Loki, but - I wanna say her name Sophie but that’s the actress, again I can’t go look it up bc I will lose my train of thought - but it’s a character who is similar to Amora and who was created by Loki and models herself as Loki but she’s actually someone else.

Ugh I can’t remember the details of the theory, but I am kinda going with it bc I don’t think that Loki would look so - not surprised but just kind of “oh, well, I wasn’t expecting that” if he were seeing the female version of himself. Like, he doesn’t seem to recognize her the way I assume he would recognize himself, male or female. Not only does that make me feel like she’s actually someone else, but also not recognizing her as the female version of himself doesn’t necessarily mean Loki doesn’t recognize her at all. He may very well recognize her as this other Amora-similar character and, if so, I really want to see how that character fits with MCU Loki (as I think she’s a comic book character but, again, I’d have to go back and find that theory).

Edit: I found a version of it here.

Overall score, B-. Mostly solid, but needs moar Loki breakdowns and tears. (That's just me, don't fucking judge me.) Also, I really hate that we have to wait a week between episodes. I wish they were following Netflix’s method of dropping the entire season at once but, then again, if they did that, I’m not sure any of us would survive.

I gotta get ready for work and I deleted and rewrote so much of this and it still seems nonsensical to me, lmfao fml. Anyway feel free to interact/send me asks/whatever, it’s going to be a long fucking day with all of this on my mind. I’ll be working my way through my dash as best as I can.

Oh, also! Loki is so fucking pretty in this episode! The TVA suit is ugly, but he makes it work, and his hair's combed nicely and he looks like he finally got an opportunity to sleep and shower and eat something and, yknow, it's working for him.

#loki tv series spoilers #loki series spoilers #loki spoilers #loki pokey artichokey #also thought it was interesting that as soon as mobius gave him the jacket #loki barely took it off and didn't go anywhere without it #lending even more credence to the fact that he likes to be as covered up as possible at all times

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elleonmybeloved · 4 years

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For the city of song, wind, and wine, it was a regular occurrence every other month to hold a music competition. Onlookers would gather around the large open space surrounding the statue of Barbatos and anybody above the age of thirteen could compete as follows: perform three songs, one of which had to be an original composition, solo in front of the audience. There was no limit to the number of instruments one could use, but since the rule was for solo performance only, it was unusual to see the use of more than one instrument.

The prize was 10,000 mora, 3 free meals from Good Hunter, and a commemorative feather artifact meant to honor the wind archon. There was of course, clout associated with the victory however, so naturally all the bards in the city of Mondstadt competed fiercely for the victory.

Lumine had the pleasure of finding out about the competition as a result of trying to buy some mint and honey and being told by Blanche that she would likely be out of stock by eight a.m. every day for the next week and a half. Mint tea with honey was one of the best ways to soothe the throat, so the city’s bards were snatching it off the shelves and shutting themselves in to compose and practice their songs without risking anybody hearing and ruining the impact of their performance.

For the young woman, it meant no sticky honey roast, radish veggie soup, calla lily seafood soup... unless she felt like picking it herself or going to Liyue just to buy some. And she sure as hell wasn’t about to attempt finding and messing with a bee hive in the wild. Unintentionally acquired powers of wind or not.

At the moment though, Amber was taking it harder than she was.

“Ugh I totally forgot that the Good Hunter doesn’t sell sticky honey roast this week because of the competition... I was totally looking forward to a nice hot plate of sweet ham after all the hilichurls I had to chase off the roads today too.”

“Why not have a sweet madame instead?” Lumine suggested. “It’s basically the same thing.”

Amber gawks at her. “How can you say that? See, this is what makes it so obvious you’re not from around here. Everybody knows the taste of those two dishes are not even remotely similar to each other.”

She’s teasing, it’s obvious from the exaggerated shock and pout of her lip, but something about what she said makes the neutral smile slip from Lumine’s face.

“Hey, if you think about it, she’s right you know!” Paimon comes to Lumine’s defense. “One ingredient is sugar, and the other is meat!”

“You eat slimes.” Amber says. “On purpose. Sorry but that automatically disqualifies you from giving culinary advice.”

“Wait a minute. On purpose? That implies a story I think I’d very much like to hear.” She turns to see Kaeya walking up behind them, a bag of something in his hands. It seems he had been shopping. And eavesdropping on their conversation.

“Oh no, there’s nothing like that.” Amber waves her hand in a nonchalant motion that would be convincing if she could lie with her face as well.

“Mmhm, sure.” He says with that smirk that never seems to leave his face.

“I should get going.” Lumine says, cutting off Amber’s reply before she can open her mouth. Once these two get started they can really argue, and she doesn’t have the time or energy to stick around for that. Especially when Charles made a deal with her to probe customers for info on her brother if she could find and bring back all of the lost business records that had been spewed from the tavern during the storm.

“Okay, see ya later!” Amber says with a salute.

“Yes, run along now.” Kaeya makes a shooing gesture.

The sun is setting by the time she is looking for the last one, hasty now that the natural light is fading. She had found some on the roof of all places, and she had all but scoured the ground, so here she was looking down dusty chimneys and clinging to the roof tiles like a squirrel every time the wind made her spook.

“Gotta be around here somewhere.” She mumbles to herself. Paimon had since gotten hungry and was presumably out eating, or looking for something to eat.

It’s a bit of a habit to use her elemental sight when searching for something, even though there wouldn’t be any traces she knows of on the documents. That’s how she ends up seeing it. At the top of the windmill, bright teal anemo energy, leaking out from the door and window in a slow trickle. Above the window, papers, caught in the gear that connects the wooden support to the spinning white blades of the mill.

“Aha.” Those must be the documents. Lumine gets a running start off the roof of the house and launches herself in the air. Thank the stars for the wind crystal Venti gave her- with a whoosh it pushes her up and gives her the altitude necessary to skip what would’ve been a sketchy climb up the curved wooden wall of the mill. Below her, she sees a young woman at the base of the mill reading and writing something in a notebook, and prays she doesn’t look up. Sure she has her license but it would still be embarrassing to be seen. Or asked questions of.

Landing with a modicum of grace, she very carefully steps across the roof tiles over to where the papers are stuck. It takes a bit of gentle wiggling but they come loose, and she puts them in her pack.

No sooner had she buttoned the flap than had the door to the balcony below her slammed open, and a “Who’s there?!” startle the absolute daylights out of her.

Lumine looses her footing.

She doesn’t hear the “oh crap” someone says because she is falling with a panicked shout, but before she can even open her glider wings, she’s being gently floated through the air. Wind carries her back up and places her gently down on the floor of the balcony. Standing above her with a distressed look on his face, Venti abandons his lyre to rush over and pat her in several places, checking for injuries.

“Oh no, are you okay? I swear I didn’t mean to make you fall!”

“I’m fine.” She says breathlessly. Behind them the door is open and there’s a small room filled with straw, crates, and some random items strewn about.

“I’m so sorry.” He says, hands still patting at her, blue eyes wide. “I didn’t even know it was you, traveler.”

“I’m okay.” She gets to her feet. In the room there is paper strewn about everywhere like a tornado hit. “...What are you doing here?”

“I could ask you the same thing.” He casts a glance down and behind her. “But not out here.”

He scoots back inside the room and motions at her to come in. Curious, she does so. He closes and locks the door behind him.

“So...” She prompts.

“So,” He says, “You found me! Good job. How’d you do it?”

“Uh, what do you mean found you? I wasn’t looking for you.”

“You weren’t?” He looks genuinely surprised to hear this.

“I was looking for some tavern documents blown away in the storm, I found them on the roof.” She explains. “Why would I be looking for you?”

“Heheh.” Venti laughs nervously instead of answering. “Oh! I see!”

“What’s with all the papers?” They are seriously everywhere. Lumine knows him well enough to know he’s not the scholarly type.

“I could tell you, but then I’d have to kill you.”

“... Okay. Never mind then.”

“Just kidding!” He’s quick to quip when she doesn’t get the joke. “But it is a secret so if you want to know you have to swear you won’t tell a soul!”

“I swear.” She says curiously. “Aren’t I already keeping one of your secrets well?”

“That you are.” He nods. “Very well. I’m in the middle of composing a new song. And practicing my other one.”

He announces it with a lot of weight, like it’s something super important and not exactly the type of thing she would expect a bard to say.

“And that’s a secret because?”

“A new song to use in the upcoming music competition. Surely you’ve heard of it? It’s a new tradition most people in Mondstadt know about.”

“Oh, that. Yeah I have heard. It’s why I can’t buy any mint or honey for the next week or so.”

“That’s right! I have some though, do you want some?”

“No, it’s okay.” Seemed like he needed it more anyways. “Is it going okay though?” She refers to the papers strewn willy nilly.

“Sort of.” He says, absentmindedly plucking at his lyre. “I’ve got my first song down, it’s one of the old ones from a few hundred years ago called Lion Heart, a ballad about the bravery of the great hero Venessa.”

“Who?”

Venti’s eyes go wide. “Who’s Venessa? You mean you haven’t heard of her? She’s the most famous hero in Mondstadt’s history.”

“... Not from around here.” She says. “Not really familiar with history yet.”

“Wanna hear the story? I have several songs you can choose from that tell it.”

“Hmm. Will it cost me?”

“Ahahaha! Of course not. For you Lumine, my performances are always free.”

“Okay then.” His enthusiastic smile is contagious, and although Lumine has no interest in Teyvat’s history beyond what could be relevant in finding Aether, she can’t help returning it with one of her own as she takes a seat on the floor.

The next hour is spent regaling her of the tales of a young woman whom she could not forget was a redhead even if she tried. Venti’s voice is beautiful, and he sings with such reverence and fervent adoration of this hero that she almost suspects a deeper relationship existed than that of the sung supporting role of Barbatos in this historic rebellion.

“You must really admire Venessa.” She says after clapping and giving a small smile at his formal bow.

“Everybody does.” He says with a shrug. “She was something special.”

Something squeezes hollowly in her chest.

“Now that I think of it, she’s the one Jean mentioned when she got sick from overworking and I had to help out.” Lumine pulls forward the relevant memory, blocking out the strange aching feeling. “She must have been a force to be reckoned with to make Jean feel inferior.”

“I could sing her praises forever.” A rare seriousness passes over Venti’s face. “So brave. Fiery hair like a flame that would never die out.”

Lumine has never seen a woman with red hair. It must be rare in Teyvat. It must be considered very beautiful.

“What about the other song?”

“Ehe, right, the other song. That is, the one that I’m composing. Well I’m not having much luck. But I think you could help me.”

“Me?” She asks. “What can I do?”

“Tell me about your most recent adventures.” He replies. “For inspiration.”

Lumine is flattered. “Wait, you’re writing a song about me- my adventures?” It’s kind of embarrassing to say from the pure self importance it assumes but she is sure she hasn’t misunderstood him.

“Heheh. Would you like that?” He’s rubbing the back of his neck. Lumine forgets about redheads.

“It’s a little embarrassing.” She claps her hands together in her lap, feeling warm. “What are you going to say?”

“Nothing weird, don’t worry!” He’s quick to say. “Nothing private either.” He’s probably talking about the unknown god and the loss of her powers.

“It’s fine with me.” Lumine acquiesces. “Just don’t get carried away. I don’t want a bad reputation.”

“It’s not that kind of song.” Venti is quick to assure her. “It’s uhhh... well, you’ll find out.”

“You’re not going to tell me?”

“And ruin the surprise? Heheh, nah, you’re just going to have to wait and hear it when everybody else does.”

Before she can say anything in response, she covers a yawn. It must be well into the night by now.

“Oh, you must be getting tired. Sorry for keeping you so long. Didn’t you need to go do something? I totally forgot about that.”

So had she.

“It’s okay. I do need to get going now though.” She says it with a sigh, getting up to leave. “Good night... and good luck with your song.”

Venti beams like the sun. “Thanks! I have a feeling it’s going to go just swimmingly now. Good night!”

Leaving the room feels like re-entering the world as the lights and sounds of the city surround her once more. Funny, despite the music, it had felt so quiet in there. Like they were the only two people for miles.

Weird.

#genshin impact #venti #traveler #venti x traveler #part 1 of this bit for now #is Lumine jealous of Venessa? ...perhaps.

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good-doctor-imagine · 3 years

Text

BANG! (Stanley Uris)

Pairing: Stanley Uris x Reader

Summary: Meeting your soulmate is something that you've dreamed of for a while. Who would have thought it would happen like this?

Word Count: 0.9k

You couldn't help but wonder what your soulmate would be like once you met them. Would they be chivalrous or frivolous? Would they be talkative or reserved? Where would you two end up meeting?

Sighing, your head came down to lay gently on the table, turned so you could gaze at the small timer on your forearm. 'Only time can tell, I guess.'

"Hey (Y/n), you okay?"

You instantly perked up at the sudden presence of your friend Beverly.

"Oh, Bev! Yes, I'm fine. I was just..." You paused for a moment. You didn't really want to mention your nerves about meeting your soulmate. It was a bit embarrassing, you should be looking forward to it, not shying away from it. "...thinking about something."

Despite your lack of detail, Beverly seemed to understand what you were getting at. She had been your friend for several years and she knew you practically as well as you knew yourself.

"What is it? Are you afraid they won't like you or something? We've already had this conversa–"

"No, no," You waved your hands in front of her, completely dismissing her idea. Some people did really struggle with that, believing that their destined wouldn't like them for some awful reason. You wouldn't lie and say you never had those thoughts but they weren't as relevant anymore. You didn't struggle with that anymore. In your mind, if you were destined, then you were destined, and if your soulmate didn't accept it then it's something they would have to figure out.

You softly skimmed your fingers over the ticking number, the hairs on your arm sticking up slightly from your cold fingers. "I don't have much time. I'm just thinking about them. Who they are, what they look like, what they want to become..."

Beverly smiled at your expression. It was like you were already in love but you didn't even know who they were yet. She knew that your soulmate is a lucky person and whoever it is would get a stern talking from her if they ever hurt you.

"How long?" Beverly questioned, leaning in to look at your arm.

00:19:23:48

"Oh! That means you're meeting them tomorrow morning!"

"Hey quiet in the back! This time is supposed to be used for studying." Your teacher's voice scolded from the front of the classroom.

Beverly ducked her head, a mischievous smile growing on her flushed face. You chuckled at her, grabbing back onto your pencil before turning your attention to your chemistry worksheet.

Even with your pencil in your hand, it was hard to focus on your worksheet with the timer ticking on your forearm.

•••

"Bye, mom!" You yelled into the house as you left, trying not to stumble down the front porch stairs. Your legs were practically shaking at this point and your fingers felt like they were vibrating from the nerves that coursed through you. You knew you didn't have long left but you didn't know exactly how long because you decided to wear a jacket to combat the heavy rain that fell from the sky.

It was a bit thrilling not being able to see the exact time. You knew that when you saw them it would be obvious anyway. Most people say that it's obvious when you find your soulmate. It's like all time stops and you two are the only ones that exist... yeah, pretty cheesy.

Your eyes danced around the sidewalk as you sped walked to school. Not many people walked this way to school, so you doubt you would meet them on the way but–

And then it happened. As your eyes rose from the edge of the sidewalk, it was like all time stopped. Across the crosswalk, there was a boy, staring at you with the same wide eyes. You stood still, eyes unable to move away from him.

Apparently, luck must have not been on his side. He was so entranced by the view of his soulmate that he forgot to look at what was in front of him.

BANG!

You gasped, running across the empty crosswalk and to your soulmate who was covering his nose with his hands, his umbrella laying on the ground next to him.

"Are you okay?" You asked, crouching down and hovering your hands over him, not sure if you are allowed to touch him.

Your soulmate let out a laugh, the corners of his eyes scrunching up as he smiled. Immediately, the tension in your body disappeared and you started to laugh as well.

"That was so not cool of me," Your soulmate groaned after calming down, finally opening his eyes to look at you again. Time didn't stop this time but it didn't feel any less special.

"Really? I think it was, you tried to take on that stop sign just for me." You grinned at him playfully, picking up his umbrella and holding it over him. It was a bit futile since he was already wet but he appreciated your effort.

"Sorry I couldn't do better. The stop sign is pretty invincible."

You shook your head and helped him up, handing his umbrella back to him.

"My name is (Y/n) (L/n)."

"Stanley Uris." He greeted back, his face slightly red from embarrassment.

•••

"Wow, that was really how you met?" Richie questioned, leaning forward in the hammock. "That was so lame, Stan."

Stanley sunk down in his chair. Although it had been a few months, he still got embarrassed from how you two had met. You, of course, didn't care at all. You found it a bit endearing. Not everyone is perfect and seeing how Stanley responded in the situation made you fall further in love.

"Then why don't you tell us how you and Eddie met, Richie?" You inquired, leaning your head on your palm.

Richie's face bloomed red and he shot back into the hammock, burying his face in his comic book.

"That's what I thought."

#stanley uris #stanley uris it #stanley uris x reader #stanley uris imagine #x reader #oneshot #imagine #it 2017 #it 2017 imagine #it 2017 x reader #it chapter one #it chapter one x reader #it chapter one imagine #gn!reader #Wyatt Oleff #wyatt oleff imagine

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lilshotgun · 3 years

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So here's why i've been inactive for the past couple months on tumblr:

As many of you know, I've been a fairly avid content creator for the warrior nun fandom creating a ton of content for free. I joined a Warrior Nun discord server named Future Warrior Nuns (which is a ridiculous name considering in the show Ava says there will be no more warrior nuns but that's besides the point) and the treatment I received there was amazing. At the beginning. I spoke up about racism and injustices within the community because you cannot escape it anywhere unfortunately and I believed I'd found a community that would protect me and be there for me if i was ever faced with racism or hate.

For clarity, anyone in blue is a moderator. As you go on to read this their usernames and profile images might change so I’ll clarify who is who. I’ll only be using the names I’ve been presented with and only the ones that are most relevant to the situation.

Fiesta (white American cis woman) aka Doesn't Kelly, Witch Rhyme

Taz (white Australian cis woman)

Milan (a very sheltered American transmasculine poc whos uncomfortable talking about racism because they've never had to deal with it) aka Who The Fuck Is Kelly

Rory (white Australian cis woman) aka Stronger Kelly

But after a while, things slowly started to change. It was subtle and if you hadn't been there from the beginning, you wouldn't have noticed. It started with the moderators spending less time in the server because they had made many of their own servers and spent far more time over there. Which is understandable when you’re a group of friends that all have a common purpose. But the lack of leadership was palpable. I had to sometimes direct fellow server members to proper channels or do a few other things that were supposed to be things that the moderators were supposed to take care of and their lack of care for the server was becoming more relevant. If you were in their little group of friends or kissed their ass then they wouldn't target you unnecessarily.

Exactly three weeks later, (and only one week after my birthday in which everyone was super sweet and nice to me) the love and friendship they claimed to have for me vanished completely. For context, people in positions of power, especially in a server, should be people you can come to if you ever have an issue with anything or anyone. They should also be people that can come to terms with admitting their behavior was incorrect when being told so. So here is what happened:

I have always been open about being a transmasculine person of color on all my platforms, and if you know me on any platform you know that. The behavior shown here between me and the moderators was absolutely appalling to me. They pushed my voice aside and only acknowledged Narcissa, a cis white woman, who was agreeing and saying the same things i had because i had asked her in private to help me out because i felt it was unfair that two server moderators were coming at me so aggressively.

As you can see from the screenshots, they claimed that I attacked Fiesta when i was simply pointing out that her behavior was hypocritical and unfair especially because she is in a position of power and that's something people of power should be aware of.

I was the only one brave enough to say what everyone was thinking. And that's something I have always taken pride in. Speaking up for others when they are too scared to do so themselves. And that was shown through multiple people coming into my dms to tell me they either felt the same way I did or they felt the way I was treated in the conversation above was unfair. This next screenshot is from a private message from a former manager.

Narcissa (white cis woman) received a few apologies from the server managers privately, yet my dms stayed vacant. At this point, they made a “public apology” towards everyone in the server which I forgot to screenshot, and not a single server manager reached out to me in private. But they did share these in the server for everyone to see:

They then opened an anonymous feedback form for us to share if we had any issues privately, which of course, I did, and so I filled it out saying “wheres my fucking apology ~king” so they would know exactly who the response was coming from. I was angry and hurt that they treated me the way they did. I regretted wording it like that almost instantly after sending it. But the deed was done and it was unchangeable. And not too long after, this was posted publicly in the server feedback channel so that everyone in the server could see:

Whether I shared that it was from me or not, she violated the server moderators unanimous statement saying that everything posted in the feedback form would stay anonymous and made my response public using the excuse that me sharing my name made it okay for her to show it to everyone. I was also being informed by other people I’m friends with that the forms that were being submitted were not staying anonymous and that they were being shared from other moderators privately in other peoples' dms.

I stuck around in the server because the people that I had formed friendships with were there and they were special to me and I wanted to be able to talk to them still in spite of everything that had happened to me up until this point. I was much more subdued at this point, I was posting less art and as you noticed I practically disappeared from twitter as well.

My love for Warrior Nun was decreasing rapidly because the environment had become so toxic and unwelcoming that I felt scared to say much in the server in fear of being banned after seeing one of my trans poc friends banned for saying hi to another member. They had been looking for a reason to ban him for being on my side instead of theirs and apparently found the “perfect” excuse. They deleted his messages and claimed in their private admin channel that he had harassed someone in the server without screenshotting the false evidence first. How do I know this? Because I had a person on the team that valued me as a person instead of as a content creator and what I could give to the server.

I proceeded to curate the server for what fit me best, considering the ridiculous number of channels they created that had nothing to do with the show at this point. And there was an option for members to do that so I used the tools they had provided with and opted out of channels I no longer wanted to see. I consolidated it down to 35 out of 66 channels because some of them had no opt out option. And still, it was way more channels than I'd prefer to be in. I narrowed it down to only ships I actually cared about instead of having a bunch of channels I was never gonna read or say things in. And that's when the manager that cared about us provided me with these telling screenshots.

Why put me in “jail” over removing some roles? It may not have been explicit, but the internalized racism of putting a person of color in “jail” for curating what they wanted from a server is frankly off putting to say the least. "Implicit racism includes unconscious biases, expectations, or tendencies that exist within an individual, regardless of ill-will or any self-aware prejudices."

And what does carl bot do exactly? It logs EVERYTHING. But only if that feature is enabled. And clearly, in Future Warrior Nuns, it is.

They didn’t care about me and didn’t care that I was a consistent content creator. For lack of better words, I was one of the biggest reasons the actual part of the server that was dedicated to the show was constantly active and once I became quiet, along with a few other content creators I talked with, the activity decreased immensely. I said things here and there but that was about it. Until I was looking through their emotes. I noticed that they had trans, gay, demi, bi, aro, and ace heart emotes but the lesbian one wasnt there. Which was honestly surprising considering how much of the fandom identifies as lesbian. So I asked for it to be added and after it was, so many people were super happy because of it.

One day later i asked for more Mary emotes because they hadn’t completely brushed me off after requesting for the lesbian pride one. I noticed that Ava, the white character, had 72 animated and still emotes at the time while Mary, the black character, only had 18. And only 4 out of those were positive emotes. Here's that conversation:

I offered up my services to create Mary emotes for them considering I was an artist and content creator and it would be no issue for me at all to contribute but they declined, saying they were working on some themselves and that they would eventually add them to the server. The ones that they had created all looked terrible. They didn't know how to color correct her skin so that it wouldn't look ashy because of the filters used in the show and instead of asking for help from me, an artist of color, they simply did their own thing. And from 18 emotes, it went up to a dazzling 24.

Needless to say, the racism they claimed not to have was pretty evident at this point. It was shockingly clear that they didn’t care as much about the characters of color than they did for the white and white passing ones. After this entire debacle I didn't even bother trying to ask for more emotes for Lilith considering how warmly I was welcomed with asking for more Mary emotes.

A little less than two months after the initial incident, I still hadn’t been contacted by anyone on the admin team about absolutely anything in private. It wasn’t until people asked Fiesta if she had reached out to me or even bothered with an apology before she sent me this:

The “apology” was worthless. Too much time had passed since I was publicly humiliated and portrayed as the evil transmasculine person of color to them, and only a select few people interacted with me. I felt completely shut out because of how the admin team handled a difference of opinion. Instead of correcting themselves and admitting they were wrong, they doubled down on the intimidation and bullying by changing their rules so that they could find excuses to ban or punish anyone they felt was not on their side.

At this point, my grades were heavily declining. I was already struggling with keeping up with everything on my own due to covid and my mental disabilities. Being a victim of this racist behavior made everything worse. I couldn’t get out of bed, I was barely eating a meal a day because I had no motivation to work so I had little to no money to buy myself food. I was starving most days. And I didn’t ask my mom for help because I felt everything was my fault and that I really was in the wrong and shouldn't have said anything even though looking back at it I wasn't wrong for what I said. I had also been informed that my dad died because of covid and because of all of this stress and depression I had officially failed my classes.

This is really difficult for me to say because I’m a very private person and I hate asking for help or sharing anything about my private life, but for you to understand everything that was happening to me at the time, this is stuff you unfortunately need to know.

There’s many more things that I could say about this server but this thread is already long enough as it is and it was hard enough to write this all down. But behind closed doors, the admin team had some of the nastiest attitudes and behaviors you could’ve seen. Had they realized we had someone on their team that actually valued us and others as people, they probably would have kept their blatant ignorance and dislike towards server members hidden better. But white people like oppressing others when they know they can get away with it and this is just another sad unfortunate example that cost me and my fellow friends of color some heavy emotional and psychological damage. They did wrong and refused to acknowledge it and instead tried to find a way to ban us for not having the hivemind that they so desperately want to control everyone with. If you want to see for yourself, feel free to find a link to a discord server named Future Warrior Nuns. If you look back through their channels, you’ll find most of these conversations either gone or have many messages missing. I hope my story will help understand why I’ve been gone from tumblr for so long and i hope something like this never happens to you.

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lemoncupcake · 3 years

Text

beth and rio: is it cheating? a (weak) analysis by yours truly

so, a couple of months ago i was thinking about how in fiction cheating is basically always justified and decided to send a message to megan @foxmagpie asking for her opinion on whether or not beth and rio hooking up in 2x04 and 2x09 counted as cheating on beth’s part, which she still hasn’t answered :( (i mean, i’m being a brat, but i totally get it, i can’t imagine answering as many asks as you do, on top of like having a life lol)

today i was watching some youtube videos about the nuclear revenge and surviving divorce reddit forums, which reminded me of this topic again. and now i’m procrastinating doing my uni work while waiting for class to start, so i thought, why not write about my thoughts on the subject?? and if megan or anyone else also wants to add theirs too, even better!!

so, yeah, this is a long-winded way to say that under the cut you’ll find my thoughts on if beth was cheating on dean when she had sex with rio in 2x04, 2x09 and 4x06.

a warning: i did not rewatch anything to write this. i’m just typing this out while i wait for class to start with no preparation whatsoever. so, if i forget something, i’m sorry. feel free to tell me what i forgot and why you think it changes things (or doesn’t) :)

my hypothesis: 4x06 was cheating, but 2x04 and 2x09 were not

my supporting evidence for 2x04:

in 1x04, beth says she should “get on that”, with “that” being the fact that she’s still dean’s wife, which imo can be read pretty much exclusively as her wanting to get a divorce aka the relationship is over and therefore she can not cheat on him. if she’d hooked up with rio directly after this, it wouldn’t be cheating.

of course, directly after that dean lies to her about having cancer, so they don’t end up getting divorced. however, they’re still sleeping in separate bedrooms and i don’t think any scene indicates that beth still has any romantic interest in him, so imo they’re still not together, only co-habitating

by 1x09, they were still sleeping in separate bedrooms, but beth has clearly softened towards him and is starting to forgive him, as is made clear by her conversation with annie

in 1x10, dean asks beth to choose whether they’re still together and are going to celebrate their anniversary or not. she chooses to celebrate, ergo they are together

after that, dean gets into a car accident while ogling a jogger and beth finds out he doesn’t actually have cancer from his er doctor. imo, at that point, beth thought the relationship was over

however, after that rio shoots dean and beth feels responsible for it. she doesn’t seem happy that he’s survived in the hospital scene, but she does the most for him during his recovery. dean is sleeping in a hospital-like bed in the middle of their living room, though, so they’re still not sharing a room. you could make the point that it seems like medical necessity and doesn’t have anything to do with their relationship status but i think that if they were together, the bed would be in their bedroom bc they seem to have the space for it, so it being in the living room is telling.

in 2x02, we get a shot of beth in her bed alone in the middle of the night, so still not sharing a bedroom then.

i don’t think we get any relevant info about their sleeping situation in 2x03 and 2x04. in 2x05, obviously, we have that iconic scene of her in the bedroom alone, but i don’t think it necessarily means they’re not sleeping together, dean could have just gotten up before her. i think it’s very unlikely, though, considering how inept a father and husband he is, that he’d purposefully wake up before his wife to take care of breakfast, especially since he then goes in to bother her about it anyways, but it’s not impossible. personally, though, i do believe that at this point they haven’t shared a bedroom at all since beth first kicked him out of the house in 1x01.

going back to 2x04 itself, beth finds out dean has made bad financial decisions again and then steps up to take care of things. when she succeeds, she and dean go out to dinner together, but imo it’s a business dinner. she begins talking about boland motors right away. if i’m being honest, with the way she reacted to his praise at first, i think dean could have managed to turn it around to becoming a real date, but he fucked it up. it seems to me like beth just let him talk and make bad decisions about what she wanted to drink and eat during the rest of the meal before arranging for them to go to the bar where she’d met with rio earlier in the episode. i don’t think she saw it as a date, but i do think dean did. he clearly had no idea during the other scenes that he’d ruined his chances during the first 5 minutes.

in conclusion: i think they weren’t together in 2x04. dean might’ve thought they were on a date, but beth certainly didn’t. i don’t think we have any of them explicitly say it was one, just that they were going out to dinner. dates are only dates if both people know they’re on a date, so i don’t think it was one. if they weren’t on a date at that moment, then they still weren’t together (based on all the other evidence), so i don’t consider it cheating on beth’s part to hook up with rio at the bar.

now my supporting evidence for 2x09:

dean took the kids and left. his condition for coming back was basically for beth to break up with rio.

it’s clear that when he did come back, they (mostly) reverted back to what had been their status quo during their relationship before s1 started, so i assume that means they are together once he comes back.

the condition for dean coming back was that beth give up crime/rio. when she was having sex with rio she hadn’t yet done that and dean hadn’t come back. ergo, she and dean were not together and therefore she wasn’t cheating.

now my supporing evidence for 4x06:

it’s pretty clear in 3x01 that beth and dean went back to their previous roles after beth thought she killed rio in 2x13.

she has sex with dean on-screen in 3x03 and tries to seduce him again in 3x07 (? not 100% sure, but around that time).

in 3x11/4x01, she and dean are starting a new family business together. yes, she’s lying to dean about rio’s involvement, but that is neither here nor there. she doesn’t actually seem particularly happy about rio’s involvement and the fact that she calls dean an idiot doesn’t take away from the fact that to him she’s taking a new chance on him.

in 4x02, dean snuggles her, so they’re clearly still sleeping in the same bed (this shift initially happens during the s2-s3 time jump).

in 4x05, she gets dean out of jail.

in 4x06, i’m pretty sure we see dean in the bedroom again and then after hooking up with rio she tells him what’s going on with the secret service (which, imo, is a very stupid idea but especially so bc they did it within earshot of the kids)

based on this, i think beth and dean are together in 4x06. therefore, her having sex with rio this time around is cheating.

now, onto the most important part: do i care?

i mean, the whole reason i was thinking about this so much was because of it’s relation to how much tv/movies/books glamorise cheating. it’s ok because the significant other is a cheater too, because they’re an asshole, because they’re just plain boring and it’s clear that the character cheating is actually in love with the character they’re cheating with, so poor significant other but what could you expect? which, you know, sucks. i mean, i remember how much rory cheating on her boyfriend in a year in the life (among other things, they did her no favours in the revival) made me dislike her. i mean, she forgot the poor guy even existed!! but, you know what, i’m gonna side with the media on this one. hypocritical of me, i know, but i just hate dean that much. i hope beth divorces him soon and in the mean time i’m glad he got cheated on because he deserves it :)

#tv: good girls #ch: elizabeth irene boland #ch: dean boland #d: beth + dean #d: beth + dean + rio #txt #*p #nbc good girls #good girls nbc #whats even is this??#not a thing that makes sense that's for sure lol #enjoy :)

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