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ao3commentoftheday · 1 month

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I’m thinking about perfectionism again, specifically with respect to how it can skew your opinion of success and failure.

There’s this concept that comes up a lot when you read about issues like perfectionism: all-or-nothing thinking. It’s a trap that’s easy to fall into.

If you’re a fic writer falling into this trap, you might feel like you’re an absolute failure if your fic isn’t a 100% accurate depiction of the scene you see in your head with flawless grammar and zero typos. That is a, quite literally, impossible standard to meet and as a result of never meeting it, you probably feel one or more of the following:

lack of motivation

certainty that there’s no point in even trying

self-hatred or some other form of intense dissatisfaction with yourself and/or your skills

This is a completely logical way to feel in that mindset, by the way. Your standard for success is so high that you’re constantly a failure. If your standard for success is impossible to meet, then there is no point in trying. If there’s no point in trying, how could you possibly feel motivated?

In order to move away from those feelings, you need to move away from that all-or-nothing, black & white mindset.

One way to do this is by figuring out a new standard for success that actually can be achieved. For example, give yourself permission to have occasional typos in your stories. Gaiman’s Law states that an author will always find a typo the first time they open their published book. If even Neil himself has resigned himself to this fate, then hopefully you can too. If you managed to write your story then that’s a success and finding a typo after you’re done doesn’t turn that success into a failure.

Another thing that’s helped me is to think of every failure or mistake or dissatisfying result as a learning opportunity. If I’m not able to do something now, that doesn’t mean I won’t be able to do it at some point in the future. I just need to keep trying. Practice makes better. Practice also helps you figure out the things that are easy for you and the bits that are hard and where you might need some help - either from a fellow fan or from another kind of resource.

I think part of the reason why people can get so anxious about their fanworks is because we care so much about them. We love the characters. We love the world. We want to do them justice in our writing, and we want other fans to love our creations too.

It’s important to remember that all of us love imperfect things all the time. It’s not perfection that makes a thing lovable. It’s the heart that’s put into it.

There’s a lot of fear behind perfectionism. Fear of being caught doing something wrong. Fear of being shamed for a mistake. Fear that imperfection makes us unworthy or unlovable. Fear that a single flaw will ruin an entire work. Fear of failure.

If you want to be able to move through that fear, you need to be able to reduce it somehow. The most effective way that I’ve found is to stop writing with the goal of posting something online. Write for the sake of writing, without the pressure of showing it to someone else. That might help you to get out a first draft (or second or third) without that worry about being judged and found wanting.

If you’re not ready for positive self-talk or reframing the internal narrative (I get it. Been there.) then allowing yourself to be less than perfect in a place where no one else can see you might be a good first step.

And just because I think it’s important that you hear it from time to time: you are a wonderful, creative, amazing human being - mistakes included.

#thinky thoughts #perfectionism #this turned into a ramble sorry #long post

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kisses4lao · 4 months

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Just read some of your stuff, absolutely BEAUTIFUL I might add. Can you sfw/nsfw headcanons do the Lin Kuei boys with a super social gal? Like she’s all energetic and is HUGE on the PDA? Can she also have big titties? (Totally not self projecting or anything)

Tumblr is still being mean and not letting me edit drafts ugh so this is probably gonna be really bad srry

Tw/cw: afab reader, jealous bi han, toxic bi han? he's his own warning guys, kind of just scenarios and not hcs, still hcs tho I cannot deny you all of that, WRITING THIS AFTER I WROTE EVERYTHING AND I FORGOT THE PDA PART IN BI HANS FORGIVE ME ANON, boobs galore, Kuai being a tit guy, I literally hate this so fucking much

Not proofread fuck you

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bi han

Sfw

Wouldn't admit it, but he finds you adorable.

The way you're the complete opposite of him makes his heart melt.

You practically do all the talking in your relationship while Bi Han silently observes and listens.

When you're out together, he mainly stays beside you as you lead him everywhere.

He finds your ability to quickly make friends amazing, considering he was never able to do that(skill issue).

He can't help but smile when he sees you talk so kindly to everyone, whether you know them or not.

He usually wears his mask when you two are together because of this.

You'd most definitely be the person in the relationship to say "excuse me, he asked for no pickles", mainly because he'd refuse to send his food back because a meal is a meal.

Nsfw

Cool, calm, collected. That's what Bi Han likes to describe himself as. But it's much different when it comes to you.

My god, does this man love tight shirts. It doesn't matter what color, what time of the day, if youre wearing one, he's in the mood.

And he hates how much power you have over him.

He hates when you wear tight clothes in public, too. Mainly because it's extremely hard for him to control himself.

He sees how well you get along with others, how people stare at you with nothing but admiration, and he can't help but feel jealous.

More jealous than he'd like to admit.

Bi Han thinks that he should only be the one staring at you, that he's the only person who can give you the love you deserve.

He'd occasionally see other men staring, looking at your curves and the smile that Bi Han loves so dearly.

He hates the amount of jealousy that pulses through him, clenching his fists tightly as he tries his hardest to keep his composure.

When you get home however, he's showing you just how much he loves you, deserves you, needs you.

He can't help his hands from wandering your body, taking in every curve and relishing in just how beautiful you are.

He'd whisper praise as he kisses and nibbles lightly on your neck, cupping your breasts as a gasp escapes your lips.

You could feel the tent in his pants as he began grinding against your inner thighs, desperately calling out your name as he continues.

His breathing is heavy, fanning your neck as his teeth sank into your shoulder.

A surprised yelp escapes your breath as you can now feel his breath hitting your ear.

"Look what you do to me, you'll have to help me with this, you know."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Kuai Liang

Sfw

He'd absolutely love seeing you socialize with others.

He'd love the way you can strike up a conversation with anyone and just turn such a bad mood into a light hearted one.

He completely commends your social skills and practically can't go anywhere without you.

Kuai Liang himself would most likely indulge in PDA on his own, so if you initiate, he isn't going to stop you.

He loves holding your hand in public, he loves making people know that he's with you.

He'll also kiss you in public, but not often. Like, at all. He prefers to keep something like that private.

But if you insist, he can't really deny you.

Nsfw

Two words: staring problem.

This man can NOT keep his eyes off you.

Seriously, who decided you can be THAT fine? He genuinely can't stand it.

He's in love with all of your curves, and he LOVES your breasts.

He genuinely can't help wanting to nap on them. Theyre big and soft, can you really blame him?

Kuai Liang would just, touch them. All the time. No warning, he'd walk up to you and just palm them.

Oftentimes, this leads into other things. Kuai is generally just a big fan of titties. Any size, any shape, any color, if you have them, he loves them.

So, he's a professional titty sucker. Willingly.

Kuai genuinely does feel comfort in bringing you pleasure, and if you both get pleasure from doing something, he's all for it.

But if you want to make a night all about him? He's more than excited.

He'd absolutely have you tit fuck him.

He kind of doesn't even get pleasure from the actual feeling, he mainly gets off to how you look during it.

If he was going to be completely honest, seeing you topless and pressing your breasts around his cock is so much more pleasurable than most things.

He'd be a complete mess while watching you, he'd grip the sheets in his hands tightly as he watches his cock disappear and come back through your breasts.

He whimpers as you begin to place kitten licks on his tip, hissing as his grip on the sheets tighten.

Seeing you like this never fails to turn him on quickly, anything that involves you turns him on, but that's not something he'd admit.

"Y/n- please,, let me cum already~"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tomas

Sfw

Oh my god.

This man would be OBSESSED with you.

You're pretty AND social? He might as well propose immediately.

He's constantly around you, literally never leaving you alone, especially not in public.

If Tomas has to go into a public setting and he can't bring you, he isn't coming.

To him, you're like an emotional support person. You're usually the person who starts conversations for him, and he genuinely doesn't know what he'd do without you.

He loves how kind and naturally nurturing you are, the smiles he sees on other peoples faces simply because of you is something that has made him more happy than he's willing to admit.

Nsfw

STARING PROBLEM but worse.

Tomas is genuinely insufferable when it comes to your body.

Since he practically worships the ground you walk on, he worships your body even more.

If you were to ask him for literally anything, no matter what it is, he'd do it for you, but he has weaknesses.

If you were to ask him for something while batting your eyelashes, he'd simply stop working.

Because of this, sex with him usually results in him being a bottom.

Yeah, I know, it's practically cliche at this point to make Tomas a bottom, but have you SEEN him?

That man is on his knees day and night trying to please you.

He'd usually have you ride him as one hand would be on your waist while the other is firmly holding one of your breasts.

Sometimes he gets too in the moment and holds both of them, but can you really blame him?

Hes entranced to say the least. They're big, soft, warm, how could he not want to hold them constantly?

Even just touching them is enough to get him off.

His head would be thrown back is pleasure as his grip on you tightens, moaning out your name as he bucks his hips upward.

"Shit- hah,, y/n~ I'm so- ngh, close~"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Might disappear and never post again wouldn't that be fucking funny

#mortal kombat smut #mortal kombat x reader #mortal kombat x reader smut #bi han x reader #bi han smut #bi han x reader smut #kuai liang x reader smut #kuai liang smut #kuai liang x reader #tomas vrbada x reader smut #tomas vrbada smut #tomas vrbada x reader

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pinkyqil · 4 days

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I'm sorry

Lucy bronze x ona batlle x r

Summary: childhood bestfriend to lovers to strangers

Warning: just toxic bestfriend, jealousy issues to many spelling mistakes for me too care for at this point in life

You and Lucy had always been together 24/7 has you both grew-up together like the childhood friends you're. Never letting go of one another. Always following each other, most people would think that you both were together.

"You've always felt attracted to lucy. Because of the way she treats you, always taking care of you getting the stuff she knows you'll need and most of all dealing with your massive sassy princess attitude.

Back in 2020 where she played for Manchester city around the covid out-break. You both decided to moving in together, always needing each other's company. After a while of living with lucy she finally confessed her feelings which you felt the same way.

Making you both finally official has most of your friends have been anticipating the moment.

You and lucy relationship had been going amazing. a little fights here and there but nothing to serious that would go way too far. Until she announced that she'll be leaving to play for Barcelona meaning you'll both have to do long distance until she comes for break or international duties.

Which you were okay with until now you've both been arguing way more recently all you ever wanted was for her to make more time on her busy schedule but she couldn't has they've been having game after game. Making you upset which would start random yelling match from the phone's.

"Another yelling match". said ona

lucy and ona had gotten really close for the past months. that she been playing for barca has she was found by her in the locker room crying from one of your arguments. Since then they've both gotten really close

"Yeah it just getting way worse and I don't think I know what to do".lucy said

"lucia I think we both know what you need to do" replied ona.

"but ona you know I can't I love her too much to do that she's been through everything with me all I want is to is too fix the holes in our relationship but nothing seems to work".

"I know but you can't keep pushing it like that do what best for both of you". ona told her while holding her hands.

That night you got a call from lucy which you weren't expecting.

cause it would have been really late for lucy which meant she was definitely up thinking about something but what she told you honestly couldn't comprehend.

She was breaking up with you over the phone from 1,137.96 kilometers away from each other that night you cried your heart out from the heavy feelings to now feeling empty.

You lost the love of your life the person that made you smile gave you whatever you needed that assisted you without asking you lost her.

And now feeling broken pices that no one could ever pick up again you hated this banging pain.

It been months since you're break up with lucy some people could've seen it from a distance but other's likewise.

it came shocking to both families who were sure that you both would have worked it out and get married in the future.

But they were wrong cause now she was with ona.

Ona is a pure soul nothing compare to you. you've tried hating her but couldn't the girl was way to nice for her own sake everyone around her loved her which you couldn't get that much what was so special about her but not you.

The last time you saw Lucy was around her vist back to england but instead of as lover you both we're now mere strangers who were once deeply inlove.

A/n : this has honestly sleeping in my drafts for the longest of time and I just got it done there's probably a lot of mistakes cause it wasn't proof read yet but other than that hope y'all enjoy this and don't forget that my request are open

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chronicbeans · 1 year

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okayokay I really wanna know some headcanons on what it would be like if puppeteer reader never got knocked out and wally never tricked them and they now just have to deal with wally being part of their daily household life in the real world 😭

Yippee! Okay, so I think this is how it would go...

Wally Darling Living Life with a Puppeteer Reader in the Real World:

🏡 You better be ready for some chaos. In this world, you probably decided not to even threaten Wally with burning. He probably managed to, somehow, convince you that he will be good from now on. He truly means it, too! The problem is... He doesn't understand what humans can and cannot take.

🏡 You see, as an example, he'll probably be confused about what you are doing with your mouth and that piece of food. Puppets don't eat. Well, Wally does, but he eats with his eyes. He just kinda... Stares the food into nonexistence. So, when he hears that humans, like Henry, Angela, and yourself, need to chew and swallow? He is amazed and wants to try so himself! This causes him to get peanut butter and jelly stuck in his felt for about a week.

🏡 When you begin working, again, you realize that Wally can't come home with you. You put him in the tote, telling him to stay put. However, when you get in your car, he is somehow already in the passenger seat and ready to go back to your place. Your boss keeps asking you where he goes, but you just tell him you don't know.

🏡 Wally's voice actor (who I actually have a draft in the works for information on my version of them), Eddie's puppeteer, and everyone else who was present at the night of the incident will avoid you because Wally is ALWAYS close to you. They're smart people, and Eddie's puppeteer saw with their own eyes that it was him. They all know that Wally is a threat that is not to be trifled with.

🏡 Angela is probably going to be tormented everyday by just the knowledge that Wally is alive. She'll never get over it. The only small thing that makes it better is that she gets to see Henry make a friend. They ended up making up for Wally breaking into her room, so now Henry and Wally are constantly hanging out whenever you aren't around. She also likes the fact that Henry has someone else to look over him if you ever get sick.

🏡 The one downside for Wally is that, because he never really gets any sleep, he is going to be getting more and more tired. He can get a little sleep whenever you are there to watch over him, though. Especially if you hold him like a stuffed animal while you sleep! He will be out like a light switch if you do that.

🏡 Wally will have some sensory issues. His neighborhood is all soft and plush. He has tried to describe it. The most he can really say is that it is like all your senses are muffled. So, when he is in your world, everything can just be too much at times. When he gets like this, you'll most likely find him in your room, rocking back and forth a bit or scribbling aggressively on a piece of paper with any writing utensils he can find, not really drawing anything and just doing so to move his arm in a soothing manner. In those cases, he likes to have you give him a tight hug to ground him. It reminds him of the ones Barnaby gives him when he is in the neighborhood, actually. Just not as fluffy.

#welcome home #wally darling #wally darling x reader #welcome home arg

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onlydeas · 1 year

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someone requested to do heimdall as a dad i accidentally deleted the draft :| sadly

but here i go againnn i hope you all enjoy :)

Heimdall as a dad headcanons!

No one could believe you married the biggest jerk there is, Heimdall. Everyone would approach you and ask what you saw in him, yet behind closed doors, Heimdall is a wonderful husband to you. when you found out you were pregnant with his child you couldn't wait to tell him

Heimdall was hallucinating, he knew you were pregnant before you told him, so when you eventually told him, he pretended to be surprised, but later told you he already knew. of course how wouldn't he know your husband can read your mind anytime after all that courage you put to tell him

He wants to do everything for you, which you appreciate, but you don't want to feel helpless. You could be on the other side of Asgard, ready to pick up something, and all of a sudden he's right there picking it up, scolding you for not calling him. he then gives you a lecture on why its "unsafe" for you to do anything

If you thought he was protective then, think again. He doesn't even want you out of his sight anymore; he needs you right next to him. He can see everything, but it would make him feel better if you were right next to him. When he spotted Sif near you, he went insane. What was she doing with you? Sif has been quite helpful, as has Thor surprisingly. You sometimes get the feeling that they are attempting to make up for what they did to Modi and Magni. but you don't say anything its none of your buisness anyways you are just happy for once they don't seem like they are angry at the world.

This has nothing to do with Heimdall a bit, but most of the time, Sif loves to follow you everywhere. This can be a little unsettling since you never know if she's upset or not, but she's really waiting for you to ask for her support. She just enjoys helping you; after all, she is the goddess of family too, and she has been unable to leave you alone since learning of your pregnancy. When she makes eye contact with you and begins walking towards you, your heart sinks, hoping she isn't upset, but she only checks to see whether you've ate properly today and drank water since she always says you are now eating for two.

heimdall hates sif being around you everyday because he's meant to be around you he's YOUR husband, Sif constantly pushes him away, claiming that "all-father put him on patrol today". This always makes Heimdall furious. he always says "she acts as if shes your wife!" poor heimdall

He talks to your big belly all the time, telling it about his day and how excited he is to meet the baby he really likes telling it stories about his adventures and protecting Asgard. You think this is so sweet, and he loves to kiss and rub your stomach. He is absolutely so in love with the fact that you are carrying his child.

Heimdall has issues with everyone, including the baby. as much as he loves the baby you're carrying he loves you even more he'd go to war for you so when the baby kicks excessively and you wake up in the middle of the night groaning, he lectures the baby, "You can't keep hurting mommy. She needs her sleep."

When the time came for you to give birth, Heimdall was more anxious and afraid than you were because he wanted things to go perfectly for the delivery of both you and his child. He was perfect. Your son was perfect. You may say that he resembles Heimdall, heimdall was so happy that he kissed your forehead and praised you on how well you did during the birth of your son. "you did amazing sunshine"

Heimdall laid by your side cuddling the baby and leaned in to kiss you as you slept. He was overjoyed to have his own small family like Thor.

He had Heimdall's beautiful glowing eyes and most of his features, and as the baby grew and grew into a toddler, you would think it was adorable that your son was at least attempting to understand some words and make out words. When people saw him walking by, they would say, "Yes, that's heimdalls and y/n’s child."

as heimdall would live and die for you and loves you with every blood cell in his body your son loves you with every drop of water in the ocean heimdall cant say he has the best relationship with his son because they both argue about who you love the most “mommy loves me the most !!” heimdall slowly turns around to look at his son and bends down “well guess what your mommy and i got married and we had you because of the love we have for each other” you finally stepped in after watching them argue for an hour straight “heimdall please i love you both a lot” they both stared into your eyes as if they were reading your mind because they were and looked back at each other and ran to see who would hug you first

as much as heimdall and s/n would argue s/n would carry a stick around claiming it was his sword and would “train” with thrúd when she was valkyrie training. even after s/n was born sif is still always there to help you when you need she would joke that she has a husband and a wife (you) since shes with you most of the time. again this makes heimdall jealous

THE SAME ATTITUDE as his father: no one can tell him anything because he will talk back and he won't regret it. Of course, s/n wouldn't say anything to you because he loves you beyond infinty, but when he gets into trouble and Heimdall tells him something, he will just respond in the same way as his heimdall does son like father.

s/n is the reason you wake up every morning seriously he wakes you up by asking for help with getting dressed and asking if he can help with breakfast. he really copied and pasted his father's appearance and just is always prepared for everything, just like Heimdall.

You sit down every morning to watch your son and husband either argue about who loves you more or heimdall teaching s/n something new. Your son is extremely intelligent, exactly like his father. sometimes when heimdall and s/n dont agree with something someone is doing they both have the same disappointed stare and stance you find this really funny because they’re just standing next to each other judging. heimdall is way taller then s/n of course his little mini him

Dinner is usually wonderful. The conversations you all have are so sweet. You truly love your family so much. You are your sons favorite person in the entire world. Heimdall is aware of this, but he is not angry since he also considers you to be his favorite person. They both look at you with such love in their eyes. "I love mommy so much !!" heimdall looks into your eyes and smiles "I love mommy too"

If you notice something crawling onto the bed between you and Heimdall while you are both asleep, what might it be? Of course, s/n, he just lays between you two, removing his father's face from your neck so that s/n can cuddle you instead of him.

There is nothing more in the world that Heimdall loves more than his family, you're so glad that you married him. He protects you and s/n as if his life depended on it and it does and he always swears that if something happened to you or s/n, he'd lose it.

When s/n found out he was going to be a big brother, there were mixed emotions because he was no longer going to be the baby. Of course, you smiled and reminded him that you would always love him no matter what. Heimdall was overjoyed that a new child was on the way. He wants to start a big family with you and he can't get enough of the happiness he has each morning when he watches you and s/n talking and getting ready for the day.

As your belly grew larger and larger each day, Heimdall showed s/n how to touch your belly without hurting you. he told s/n that the baby can hear him from the inside, of course s/n asked him if he would talk to him when he was inside your belly and you said "all the time there wasn't a day where he didn't speak to you"

At first, s/n wasn't too happy about having a sibling, but now he frequently talks about how he and your husband and the baby will go on adventures together and how he's going to teach his little sibling things. Every morning, s/n would run up to you and kiss your belly and ask when the baby was coming.

When you gave birth to your daughter instead of heimdall being worried and nervous about the birth of his child it was s/n he couldn't stop asking you if you were going to be okay, Heimdall and s/n would spend the daytimes sleeping next to each other since they were so exhausted from staying up all night to care for the baby while you rested.

You are the star of the show since you are what creates the family; Heimdall knows this and has so much respect and love only for you. heimdall and s/n would introduce the new family member to Asgard even though your husband didn't like this and this was s/n idea heimdall did it for his son, they were overjoyed that their family was growing.

Overall, Heimdall is a wonderful husband and father to his children. There isn't a day that goes by that he doesn't put you all first. Everyone knows that heimdall loves you and his children with all of his soul and wants the best for you all. He isn't overly strict with his children; instead, he just wants them to be happy and for you to be happy. However, if they do something wrong, of course, he will lecture them you are happy, hes happy and the children are happy.

i hope you guys enjoyed this !! please let me know in the requests if you want more of anything :)

have an amazing day loves !!

#heimdall gow #heimdall #god of war #god of war ragnarok #heimdall x reader #heimdall gow x reader #heimdall ragnarok #heimdall ragnarok x reader #heimdall gow imagines #heimdall god of war x reader #heimdall god of war ragnarok x reader #heimdall god of war ragnarok #heimdall god of war imagines #heimdall god of war ragnarok imagines #god of war x reader #god of war ragnarok x reader #god of war imagines #god of war ragnarok imagines

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chrollohearttags · 9 months

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not even to wake up in a haterrific mood on such a beautiful morning but I feel like I gotta say something. Especially when I’ve been seeing a multitude of posts critiquing black writers and seeing so many of amazing moots leave. (and reminder that the anon button is OFF so you will argue with the wall or get that ass cussed out publicly, your choice. And if you feel brave enough to come to my DM’s, I got something there for you too 🤗 so feel free) but I am so so so SICK of seeing these very unnecessary and annoying standards being placed on black writers. I’ve said this once and I’ll say it again that the goalpost keeps moving for us. It went from the toxic, plug, sneaky link, etc fics are harmful and damaging to us as black women to now I’ve had the displeasure of seeing that modern AU’s in general are problematic and we should write more canon AOT stories (I wish I was making this up). Don’t know about you but I want no parts of that depression fest. Especially because the ONE black person was basically observed like some type of mystical being. I’ll pass on the whole ‘why does your hair feel like that’ and a handmade’s mammy tale of tending to a war criminal’s wounds in a jail cell. Regardless, all of this is rooted in a respectability and projection issue. Because as I’ve said before, none of these critiques started until the TikTok girls started publicly bashing black writers and using them as a ploy to get views because doing it to other groups who write the SAME tropes with a “digestible” packaging would’ve gotten them backlash. So as does everyone on this hellscape of a planet, they use black women as a punching bag and laughing stock to garner engagement. Now you’ve got an influx of people regurgitating these same things and making others feel bad for what they write. I’ll be honest, a lot of these tropes/stories that I see, they’re not exactly my niche, mainly because I don’t smoke, I don’t do parties and stuff like that so I can’t resonate with it (don’t come at me, I got asthma and social anxiety, bitch 😭) but that doesn’t make me love/wanna read them any less. I love seeing different perspectives and being in another set of shoes for a while. There’s nothing wrong with that because as long as black women/enbies are happy and confident in what they write and it’s not causing harm, I’m going to support ten toes down because we need representation, we need that community and I’ll be damned if I turn my nose up in the air at anyone just trying to express their creativity. What I WON’T support is a bunch of hateful, nasty spirited shrews parading around in clean girl cosplay and bashing others to be seen as acceptable and ‘one of the good ones.’ Not liking smut doesn’t make you a better reader/writer, not liking modern AU’s and ‘overused’ tropes doesn’t make you some prophetic, divine person and sitting up in anons and on the dash, reporting fics because YOU personally don’t like them doesn’t make you superior. And running everyone else off of here won’t make your writing any better. What does it make you is a loser, a cornball ass bitch and a lazy bum. Because the energy you exert into being haters, you can simply open a Google doc or draft on here and write what fulfills you. Be the change you want to see in the world or whatever they say. Also, a lot of us ARE writing these very scenarios you all are claiming you want to see. We can also see the notes count in comparison to the ones being deemed so horrible so again? You as the consumer determine what’s popular and not. We’re only going to write what’s going to be seen. Anyways, black women/femmes/enbies, I love you. I love your stories, I love your portrayals of our favorite characters whether they’re a drug dealer or a doctor, I love seeing y’all on my dash and I hope that you continue to grow in your writing journeys. I hope that you write what brings you joy and block out all the bullshit. Stay safe and have a wonderful weekend! 🫶🏾🫶🏾🫶🏾

#and sidebar: I may have a tip to get around these community labels but I don’t want Big Mama T to catch on so feel free to DM me #if it hasn’t already been tried #cherry chats 🍒#I just want everyone to have a safe space to create #no one should feel ashamed about what they write #and no one should have to leave or close their anons because people are a special breed of stupid #and I wish I could say it was other races doing this #but I don’t believe it is #I believe all these gripes are coming from within the house and it’s so sad to see #I want us to be better fr #this world hates us as is and tearing one another down makes it worse #writing rant #cw vent #cw rant #anyways I’m going to enjoy my morning and pack orders #have a blessed one and stay hydrated

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thedgeofreality · 1 year

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Reader is at an event or party with boyfriend elvis. She has to go to the bathroom so she excuses herself from elvis and the group of people that both of them (mainly Elvis) were talking to. Unfortunately she started her period a couple of days early so she was not prepared and had no supplies with her. Also it was a bad day to wear all white luckily she had caught it before it leaked all the way through her panties but it wouldn’t take long at this point and if she sat down she knew it would seep through. She sat there for a short moment to calm her panicked state before deciding to go find elvis. When reader found him she grabbed his arm, he smiled at her returning but noticed a subtle expression that only he would recognize as something being wrong and y/n motioned him to lean down to whisper in his ear that she had a problem and needed his help quick. He apologized to the new group of people saying he would be back in a minute and then lead the reader to somewhere private not knowing what was the issue was but people were still passing by so all reader mouthed was bathroom and elvis lead the way to quickly find the bathroom. Once inside elvis asked what was going on as reader was sitting down onto the toilet. For some reason she was embarrassed not wanting to look at elvis when she told him she started early and she didn’t have anything with her. He saw her now ruined panties and was thinking about what to do as they had to stay at this event for the next hour. Reader starts crying elvis comforts her and dries her tears carefully to not mess her makeup up. he stands up and starts unbuckling and taking off his pants reader is confused. He was thankful that today was a rare day that he had worn underwear because he had to give a speech in front of everyone and his pants tended to cling in areas without any. He took off his underwear and put his pants back on. He then took the readers white pants off and wrapped a ton of toilet paper around y/n’s ruined panties and slid his underwear over them before putting her pants back on. His underwear was bulky under her pants but it was the only option. He embraced her kissing the top of her head telling her it’s okay. They return to the event and elvis keeps on eye on her to make sure she doesn’t leak.

I apologize that this request is so long but I wanted to get the scene set. Hopefully you can write this with Jaycees award era 1971 elvis in mind (maybe that is the event they are at) thank you!

A/N: I LOVE THIS REQUEST DEAR!! thank you so much anon. my first request and i hope i do it justice. i also made reader wear a dress instead of pants as i thought it would be a little more formal (and honestly i didnt notice the pants part at first whoops!) anyway enjoy ♡

Wc: 1.9K

Elvis had been invited to the Jaycees as he had been named one of the 'ten outstanding men of the nation'. He was so excited and so honored so he wanted you to come with him to the event. You agreed immediately.

It was the day of the event and you were sitting at the table with Elvis and a couple of people you didn't know. Elvis did most of the talking as you were quite shy and didn't know what to say to them. You held Elvis his hand under the table. Occasionally he would smile at you and try to involve you in the conversation as much as possible. Elvis started talking about how thrilled he was to be there and you watched his face light up. You loved watching him talk about things that genuinely made him excited.

"Man, you won't believe how nervous I am." He said jokingly. Though you knew he meant it as he told you beforehand how nervous he was for his speech. The night before, he stayed up writing things down on his little notepad and would show you occasionally to get your opinion on it. Because he would give this speech in front of a bunch of millionaires he wanted to be explicit and intelligent to them. Once he had written out the final draft he read it out to you and you were amazed by how eloquent it sounded. He went through the speech multiple times on the way to the event.

After a couple of minutes, you felt the urge to go to the bathroom. So you let go of his hand and he looked at you. You smiled at him as you excused yourself from the conversation.

You quickly made your way into the bathroom and locked the door behind you. You pulled your white dress up and sat down. As you looked down you saw a red stain in your panties. Your period had come earlier than usual, so you didn't take any tampons or pads with you. You hoped some girls were outside the bathroom, but no. There was absolutely no one outside. "great day to wear white" you thought to yourself. As you sat there on the toilet, panicking thinking of what to do. The only thing you could think of doing was finding Elvis. You weren't exactly sure on how he could help, but you had to try something.

You breathed slowly trying to calm yourself down from your panicked state as you straightened yourself out. You took one deep breath before stepping back into the room and making your way through the crowd, hoping the blood wouldn't seep through at this moment. Elvis usually stood out but in a dark room like this, he was nowhere to be found as he was wearing dark clothes. You made your way back to the assigned table, hoping he would still be there and luckily he was standing near the table talking to a different group of people than before.

You walked up to him and grabbed onto his arm. He looked down at you and smiled when he saw it was you. "Oh hi honey." He said before his expression dropped and he looked at you worriedly. You were so thankful Elvis could read you in moments like these. You knew no one else would understand, but him. He turned to face you completely. "You alright?" He asked softly. You motioned for him to lean down.

He leaned down and you got closer to his ear to whisper. "Something happened, I need your help quickly." He stood straight up and nodded, turning around to the group of people. "I'll be back in a minute." He said and gave them a smile before he faced you again. You held his hand and led him through the crowd taking him to a spot where fewer people were. "Baby, what's going on?" He asked softly, growing more worried by the minute. People were still passing by the two of you so you just mouthed the word 'bathroom' to him.

Elvis took your hand again and led you back to the bathroom, locking the door behind him. "What happened?" He asked, looking into your eyes. You sat down on the toilet and broke eye contact with him as you lifted your dress to show him your blood-stained panties. You felt deeply embarrassed and on the edge to break down in tears. "I started my period earlier." You said softly, looking down at the floor. "I didn't take any products with me."

"Oh, honey.." He said softly as he noticed your blood-stained panties. He stood there in silence thinking of what he could do to help. "No need to be embarrassed, it's alright. I'll help you." He said assuring you and you nodded. You didn't look into his eyes as you still felt a little embarrassed this even happened. You sighed and he rubbed your back, knowing how you felt. As soon as you felt his touch you broke down into tears. He kneeled in front of you and hugged you tightly. "Shh shh it's okay, I'm gonna help you." He whispered in your ear and leaned back to kiss your forehead. "Line your breathing up with mine, okay?" He said softly trying to help you out. You nodded and closed your eyes. He started taking deep slow breaths and you tried to line yours up with it. "Good job, baby." He said and caressed your hand as you continued to take deep slow breaths. You slowly opened your eyes back up as you felt a little calmer. He smiled as you looked at him. He let go of your hand as he wiped your tears away. "My make-up." You said with a shaky voice and he chuckled. "I'm bein' careful, don't worry." He said and he dried your tears making sure to not ruin your make-up. "Now, you didn't leak through yet?" He asked. "No, I didn't leak through." You replied and he nodded. He stood back up and started unbuckling his pants. You looked up at him confused as he took his pants off.

"What are you doing?" You asked. He chuckled "Well honey, thankfully I'm wearing underwear today." He said as he slid his pants off and smiled at you. "I don't understand." You replied, feeling even more confused. What does that have to do with your situation? "Well, you could wear them." He said and took his underwear off. You stared at him with a bunch of thoughts and he chuckled as he put his pants back on. "Just go along with it."

He kneeled in front of you again and looked up in your eyes. "I have to lower your panties a bit, okay honey?" He asked softly waiting for your consent and you nodded. Smiling at the way he was taking care of you. He carefully lowered your stained panties a bit and grabbed the roll of toilet paper. He took a ton of toilet paper and wrapped it around your stained panties, trying to make it work like a pad. He made sure it would be thick enough for the remaining hours you would be there with him and raised your panties back up. "That feel okay?" He asked, looking into your eyes again and you shrugged. "A little uncomfortable but it'll do." You replied and he nodded. He grabbed his underwear from the floor. "You can wear 'em for an extra layer."

"Raise your legs, baby." He said and you raised your legs as he slipped his underwear on your legs. You chuckled at him as you easily could've put them on yourself. But you liked how he treated you as if you were a porcelain doll, that could break any minute.

Once you had his underwear over yours, he helped you stand up. It felt very weird to be wearing 2 pairs of underwear with a thick layer of toilet paper, but it would have to do for tonight. His underwear was bulky as it had a lot more space than women's underwear. It looked a little weird under your dress but you had no other choice than to go along with it. He hugged you tightly again and kissed the top of your head. "There we go baby, everything is okay." He said softly.

"Can't believe you were wearing underwear." You said and he chuckled. Elvis never wore underwear as he said it was uncomfortable and weird. "Well, I have to give a speech and these pants cling in the wrong places." He replied and sighed. "If they get a face full, I'm blaming you." He joked, trying to lighten the mood and you laughed.

You looked in his eyes lovingly and smiled. "Thank you so much, Elvis. I love you." He smiled back at you. "Anytime honey, I love you too." You kissed him quickly.

"We have to go back now." He said and you nodded. You made sure you looked alright and held his hand. He unlocked the bathroom door and led you back into the room to the group of people he was talking to. The group gave you guys a smile and welcomed you back.

Everyone sat back down at their tables as the event was about to continue. You and Elvis held hands the entire time. You stared at him as it got closer to his award. You noticed how much more nervous he had gotten and you caressed his hand hoping to calm his nervous a little. He looked at you and gave a weak smile.

They finally announced for him to come up and he let out a deep shaky breath, squeezing your hand. "You alright?" He asked referring to the situation that happened earlier. And you nodded. He smiled and stood up, making his way to the stage. You watched him stand there and accept the award. And once it was finally time for his speech he searched for you in the crowd. When finding you he smiled to himself and looked down to get himself together. You could tell he was shaking but he hid it well.

"When I was a child, ladies and gentlemen, I was a dreamer." He started saying and you stared at him in awe. His speech had come out great and you looked around to see people staring at him the same way you did. You smiled and felt so proud of him. When the speech ended you applauded loudly with everyone else. He thanked everyone and made his way back to the table, his eyes not leaving yours as he sat back down. He held your hand again and leaned in to whisper. "How did I do?" He asked feeling a little unsure.

You looked at him and smiled. "That was amazing! Everyone loved it." You whispered back to him and he smiled. "Felt I was gonna die right there." He said and chuckled softly. You laughed with him.

After a few minutes passed he leaned in again. "You haven't leaked yet, right?" He asked softly making sure no one would hear it and you shook your head. "No, I'm okay." You replied and he nodded. He was very protective of you the entire day. He wrapped his arm around your shoulder to pull you a little closer to him. He looked at you smiling and kissed your cheek.

#big daddy elvis #50s elvis #70s elvis #austin butler #elvis #elvis 2022 #elvis fanfiction #elvis fluff #elvis imagine #elvis one shot #elvis x reader #elvis presley x reader #request

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danganronpadespairtime · 1 year

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Chapter 2 Progress Report

This is a report and introspective about the development of Chapter 2 of Danganronpa: Despair Time.

TL;DR: Chapter 2 of DRDT will be released in 2 parts, rather than all at once. It seems likely that Part 1 can be released in early/mid 2023, *but there is still a chance it won’t come out that early.*

Batch release

I’ve recently decided to release Chapter 2 in 2 parts, rather than all at once. That is to say, I will start airing the episodes that I’ve made so far without waiting to finish Chapter 2. When each part is being released, it will be in consistent weekly episodes. In other words, Chapter 2 is being released as weekly episodes as expected, but in the middle of the episodes, there will be a hiatus. Hopefully this hiatus is much shorter, as I simply have to finish the remainder of Chapter 2.

Part 1 and Part 2 are not equal in length. Part 1 comprises of the majority of Chapter 2, about 70% of it. Although I won’t tell you exactly how many episodes are in Part 1 or where Part 1 ends; you’ll just have to see for yourself.

This was a recent decision, meaning that the writing of Chapter 2 may not have been specifically designed to accommodate this release structure.

I did say, once, that the entirety of chapter 2 *might* be done in early/mid-2023. I regret saying that now, as it seems like a lot of people had seriously taken that to heart.

The way things are now, for me to finish Chapter 2 in it’s entirety by early/mid-2023 would involve putting myself through hell.

That being said, I do believe that just Part 1 can be released by early/mid-2023 (unless I once again underestimated it. PLEASE take this release date estimate with a grain of salt!) This is because I am nearly finished with Part 1. All I have left is to finish the following tasks:

Make 2 mini-games

Animate a CG

One or two more rounds of editing passes + finishing touches on all episodes

Make a Chapter 1 recap video

Then I will start airing episodes of Chapter 2. So you can expect episodes to start releasing sooner than if I had waited to finish Chapter 2 first!

However, I do not wish to accidentally mislead everyone a third time. Although I’ll try my best, it is possible that I cannot finish in that time, so please don’t be surprised if it is not ready by mid-2023. If that happens, I will offer my apologies again.

Past progress

I always worry that I’m taking too long of a time to make DRDT. But I had only started making the episodes in March of this year, so the speed is actually really good. In that time, I produced a new episode slightly faster than once a month.

Then, the real reason that Chapter 2 is taking so long is that, for some reason, it took me an entire year to write the script. It was half a year to write the rough draft, and half a year to refine it with my proofreader, hydrator.

I don’t know why it took that long. It might just be that I was busy last year.

Voice acting

In general, there is more voice acting in this chapter. More scenes have voice acting, and per popular request, trial mini-games are fully voiced. However, there will NEVER be fully voiced trials, so please be understanding...

I’m really grateful to the voice actors, who as always are incredible with their talent and patience with me. It’s because of their amazing work that Chapter 2 can shine.

Quality improvements

Many people made it clear that they were generally unsatisfied with the quality of Chapter 1 in many ways. For that, I deeply apologize to those who were disappointed or unhappy.

I have tried my best to work hard and improve DRDT, so that everyone can enjoy it. I think that Chapter 2 is a lot better than Chapter 1 in all aspects, but especially with regards to the writing. If there is previous issues with the pacing, or with certain characters lacking scenes, I hope you can find these issues resolved in Chapter 2. Because of that, I am very excited about it, and I hope you can look forward to it.

Future updates

It seems that I’m running out of update posts to make. Because the content that I’m working on is spoilers, I cannot post previews. And with Chapter 2 taking this long already, I am hesitant to divert my time away from Chapter 2 work to make any bonus content like comics or illustrations. In any case, please understand that even if you hear less from me, I’m still working on DT.

Conclusion

Thank you for reading this far. I hope that you will enjoy Chapter 2 of DRDT, whenever it comes out. I will be happy if you continue to support me and my work.

#update

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stay-midnight · 1 year

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Unreleased Draft #2: Divine Amusement

God! Han Jisung x Male Reader

Sypnosis this time: In this world certain gods rule over certain cities and each god graces their city with their different blessing and operations based on their own preferences but what happens when a servant of the God of Order was issued to take a vacation to the City of Entertainment where the God of Entertainment, Mischief and Enjoyment resides in?

A/N • This draft is actually more recent than snowswept tails! And the writing is definitely more improved than the s.t, this plot is something I wanted to explore cuz when i see Han on the mv of circus the firsy thing I thought of was, “What if Han was a higher being who is the embodiment of entertainment..?” HAHAHA anyways it was also influenced by genshin at that time in modern state ig.

A/N Ratings • Plot/Interest - 7.5/10, I don't mind writing it but i certainly have an idea in mind and plus its quite unique as it strays (haha pun) from the usual god/goddesses au where its usually not modern, oh and I kind of wanna see where it goes?

Writing in this draft: 8/10 much much much better! HAHAHA

Write-ability / Needed Creativity: 6.5/10 I would have to scoure my head for ideas cuz my usual bright brain doesnt function quite as well.

TW: Vulgar Words, also its kind of short.

“We are now arriving at the city of entertainment everyone — for the people stopping here, please prepare your things and pack so that we can go forward with no delay. Thank you for using SK train as your transport and we hope to ride with you again. Please entertain yourselves in this amazing city.” the voice on the speaker said in a cheerful tone contrary to your facial expression right now — pissed and not quite happy as you stood up, holding your briefcase. The other people turned their eyes on you, in the compartment — you were the only one that's about to leave.

“‘Amazing city’, my ass.” you grumbled, copying the speaker guy sarcastically, the train stopping abruptly as the mechanical doors slide open. The flashing bright lights and the vandalism drawings on the walls were the first thing you were met with as you step out of the train.

After the bullet train leaves, you look around and saw just about 5 people actually stopped here. You sighed, carrying your luggage as you walked out of the train station — cursing the name of your best friend who said goodbye to you with a smile as he watched you get send off to this hellhole.

Walking the streets of the city in the night was a hassle but in no way in hell are you riding the taxi services called "Fake Taxi" that are literally the only taxis you see pass by, you even saw two people getting it on inside them.

“Oh, Lord Bang — why here, I want out.” you cried to yourself, you wanted some place to relax — but not here, my god, definitely not here.

The unclean alleyways, the smell of alcohol wafting throughout the air, the loud men laughing with no decency, the ladies' attempt at seducing the smoking men aroundand the children laughing as they vandalize the walls with penises and other horrid stuff.

What kind of god do they worship in a place like this.. .

Your legs felt like giving out at the long walk to your booked hotel, your arms were wobbly too from the heavy luggage and lastly, your eyes were about to give out from the lack of sleep.

“Oh heavens, what kind of horrible thing did I do in my past life to have to go here.” you grunted, and finally, breath of relief releasing from your mouth as you finally came face-to-face with your oh-so-very-lovely hotel with a broken sign and walls filled with drawings that are explicit.

Very welcoming, you thought.

After a long time of contemplation about whether it was worth it to go inside, added by the fact, you felt eyes at the back of your head. You took the step forward and headed in the establishment.

–

“Mhmm, the name is already written on there — I booked it 2 days beforehand.” you said calmly at the receptionist, feet ready to bolt and eyes closing in distress. The awful scent of cigar was making your head throb, your eyes were about as bloodshot as the druggies you saw earlier.

The receptionist eyed your badge on your clothing — a symbol of worship towards the god of order. He remained looking at it before handing you a keycard, a smug look on his face as he did so. “Goddamn order scum.” he muttered under his breath before your eyes wandering to the face of the man.

Not easily swayed by it, you took your keycard and tore your eyes away from him.

Walking over to the room given in long, drawn out strides and sliding the keycard on the room — you sighed and slumped your shoulders, stepping towards the bed with much little energy left.

The room has a rather comfortable atmosphere, very different from the outside — it had well-cleaned king-sized bed filled with pillows and a warm-looking blanket, windows, an air conditioner, nightstands and a good-sized bathroom.

“At the very least, there's one good place here.” you said in a relieved way, smiling for the first time since you got on that train and falling to the bed but not before throwing your badge, phone and removing your coat.

“Oh lord, sweet sleep...” you mumble tiredly, before almost-drifting away to your bubble in a abnormal position.

RING! — —

As a response to your lethargy, your phone started ringing. Your eyes slowly blink open at the loud noise interrupting your supposed—beauty sleep.

The number shown was terrifically familiar and you rolled your eyes at the man calling you at this hour. Always finding the perfect time too.

What a fucking amazing best friend.

“What the fuck is it? It's 2:30 AM.” you aggressively said through the phone, heaviness in your tone as you were met with mellow silence hereafter.

Silence from the other line cut shortly before you were met with the voice of none other than Kim Seungmin, the devil himself. “Looks like someone didn't take his chill pill tonight.” he snarkily said, plain sarcasm on his tone.

You sat up from the bed shortly, rolling your eyes as far as they could roll, “What is it? I was about to sleep.” Voice stained with annoyance as you groan afterwards through the speaker.

“Mhm, What? Can't check up on my best friend now?” he said through the phone, making a bunch of noises as if he was on the verge of hysterically cackling.

“I swear—”

“Anyways,” Seungmin cut you off sharply, his grin widening.

“Had fun there yet? Body count yet? And I mean both sexually and the deadly kind.” he continued, snorting a bit at the end before you heard him talk to someone else in a bit.

“You are annoying. Okay, I’m going to hang up now. Y/N needs his beauty sleep, thank you for calling Y/N's phone this fine midnight. Bye.” you said sarcasm fills your tone as a sour smile is on your lips.

“Wai—”

CLICK! — —

After the line cut, you threw your phone toward farther nightstand, it barely hanging on the edge of table. Your hand rest atop your eyes, a soft snore sound passing through your lips before you flop down to the bed, sleeping like a log in a matter of minutes after the call stopped. Dreams woven in your mind as someone finally noticed outside the hotel that an outsider entered their territory — grin full of interest and awaiting entertainment.

“Well, well, well~ That old man knows how to pick his followers alright.” A cracking laugh slides down their tongue effortlessly, eyes intrigued and form trembling in excitement.

—

As the sun hangs brightly, you stretch your arms — mind aloof.

On a normal day, orderly practices, altar cleaning and other things were your main priorities but today. . .

Let's just say while the heat is shining on to you via the windows, all you could feel is as if a heavy raincloud is atop your head.

Seungmin mentioned something of a library in here, so that's the first place you will go to instead of going to daybars or clubs (which he recommended but received a smack on the back of his head).

Though he did mentioned getting laid, acting like a child as he did — you'd rather learn about why this place is quite the dump it is and about this city’s ‘beloved’ god rather than prance around like a virgin in headlights or go straight for a hooker in sight.

If somebody was reading your mind right now, they would be both hurt and amused.

You groan standing up from your now-messy bed, wiping the dried saliva from the sides of your mouth — last night's sleep was the one of the best sleep you had in awhile to be honest.

“Okay, first day — Woohoo...” You mumble to no one in particular, cheering in a monotonous way possible.v

#midnight posts #stray kids x male reader #kpop x male reader #skz smut #skz x male reader #stray kids reactions #stray kids imagines #stray kids fic #skz #han jisung x male reader #han jisung x you #stray kids jisung

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crossroadsandloudmusic · 1 year

Text

HOT DAMN ITS BEEN A MINUTE! I know I’m sorry y’all life has just been all up in the way for the past couple weeks/months but I’m back now! It’s late where I’m at so I will get started with the Matchmaker post as soon as I can but for now please enjoy this head cannon thing I wrote for y’all, it’s been in my drafts forever now but I figured sure why not, let’s finish it up and post part 1! Terribly sorry about my sudden disappearance but I have found that nothing quite fills the void more than being on here and sharing experiences with all of you! Thank you for you patience I do apologize once again, you have all been tremendous and I love you for it.

Without further ado let’s get in to it!

Recently I went to the fair and the entire time I could only think about how the Hashira would act. Therefore I decided to write and I hope you all enjoy. (Me from the future here, went to the fair and had an amazing time! Enjoy some pictures! More at the bottom)

Btw this is all based on my opinion and has no actual evidence to back it up.

Warnings: Sanemi traumatizes entire fair. But no seriously like heights, someone almost falling off a ride. That’s it tho.

PLEASE ENJOY!

The Hashira at The Fair

Part 1!

Kyojuro Rengoku:

I love Rengoku, everyone knows that. He is my comfort character, my baby daddy, if you will. So maybe I am partial but I think he would be one of the funniest characters at the fair, let me elaborate.

In my belief, he would be in charge of the entire operation. He buys the tickets, he organizes it, he rallies everyone together, but most of all he is there to ensure that everyone has a good time AND a safe time.

“Seat belts everyone!” *in ms. Frizzle’s voice*

Think I’m playing? Absolutely not. Rengoku is on the ball when it comes to height requirements and restrictions, too tall or too short that’s too bad.

Seatbelts? Don’t make me laugh. Before the ride starts Kyojuro is running and making sure all seatbelts are up to code and are fastened. He does not care if you battle some of the most violent and horrid demons there are, you will be safe at the fair.

Will question the structural integrity of the rides themselves.

Kyojuro. They are consistently taken down and put up in a span of a week, there will be stuff missing and there will be issues. It’s best not to ask.

Nevertheless he does end up having a good time. He throughly enjoys the rides that are as follows: The Scrambler-you get into these little booths and it moves around really fast in almost a star shape pattern. Whole lot of fun, one of my favorites. The Alien Abduction- it’s just an alien ship shaped building that spins around really fast. The g force sticks you too the wall. Really fun, kinda dizzy afterwards (much like sleeping with Kyojuro). And then finally The Nitro. It’s essentially a huge swing, but it’s like a swing on steroids. It’s really fast and sends you really high, this one is prolly my favorite.

Kyojuro is pretty tame when it comes to trying all the rides and when it comes to others being too short or too tall for one of the rides, he feels that he should stay beside them and keep them company so they don’t feel left out. He really wants to make sure everyone had a good time.

On terms of food served at the fair, I think he would really enjoy funnel cakes. That isn’t to say he didn’t eat atleast one of everything. (Him and Mitsuri spent a lot of time trying the fair food. They ate 6 funnel cakes. The poor people working at the food trucks were beyond stressed with how much they were eating and buying. The lemonade guy couldn’t keep up😔).

On the subject of games, Kyojuro enjoyed the darts and ring toss. Extremely good at both and as a result came home with a ton of stuffed animals. The biggest one being a stuffed sloth. Very much enjoys his sloth and let’s it sit next to his bed. (Cuddles with it sometimes, but nobody knows). Won a ton of prizes for Shinobu and Mitsuri. Gave a bunch to Gyomie as well for the kids at the orphanage. After a short talk it was decided that they come back the next day to bring the kids.

In conclusion these are the same people and you can’t tell me otherwise. 12/10 had a great time and will be coming back.

Uzui Tengen

Oh man, Uzui Tengen and his wives at the fair. Be still my heart.

Number 1. BEFORE WE GO ANY FURTHER I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE A PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT ABOUT HOW GOTDAMN CUTE THIS SHIT FINNA BE.

Number 2. Let’s not lie to ourselves or anyone else by denying that Tengen and the girls are literally the cutest relationship I’ve ever seen.

So y’all already KNOW that they gonna be having the most fun, well almost. Let me explain.

Ok so we know that Suma can be a little skittish, and Makio kinda makes it worse if I’m not gonna lie simple because when Suma does get nervous Makio can be a little harsh.

Which then results in Tengen feeling more of babysitter rather a husband taking his wives out for a fun evening. I know you maybe wondering where I’m going with this but please, bear with me.

The Ferris Wheel. A staple of the amusement industry, all with its bright lights and soaring heights, it’s no wonder it’s one of the most iconic and recognized piece of fair equipment. That being said, if you have never riding on a Ferris wheel, I do not recommend it for the faint of heart. Not it is not fast, and no it doesn’t sling you around like some of the rides, but if you have a fear of heights or just not prepared, the ride itself can be a bit jarring.

Therefore, when Tengen and his wonderful, beautiful, lovely wives all got on to the ride, it was at that moment Suma had begun to sweat. First the booth went up and then stopped, and then again, and again and again, till they were at the very top of the ride. Of course Tengen wasn’t nearly as impressed because he could jump higher than the peak of the Ferris wheel but still he acted as if he was enjoying himself. Everyone was except for Suma.

Suma clung to Tengen’s arm, this in return caused Makio to fuss. As the two of them got into it, the booth started to sway back and forth. This of course caused Suma to become even more scared.

The rest of the ride was spent trying to calm both of them down.

Btw Kyojuro was sweating the entire time as they were not adhering to the rules of The Ferris Wheel.

Absolutely shameful.

Eventually the Ferris wheel ride ended. Suma in tears, Makio still fussing all the while Hinatsuru and Tengen desperately tried to separate the two.

Rest of the evening went off without a hitch, every one of the girls got a large stuffed animal. (Tengen won these at one of those strength games. Yk the one with the big hammer and a bell at the top). (He broke it).

They all four took really cute pictures together, in fact they got several with all the hashira! 11/10 wonderful evening will definitely be coming back to the fair, next time he will be prepared for if and when Suma gets scared on the Ferris Wheel or other tall rides.

Gyomei Himejima:

Oof alright.

So.

He’s a big man, like a VERY big MAN.

7 feet 2 inches and HALF! THATS A BIG DUDE.

And I’m sure you could already understand that yes, he unfortunately wasn’t allowed on many of the rides. But☝️. He found other ways to enjoy the fair!

Let me tell y’all, this man is a BEAST at fair games. Ring toss? Boom, undefeated. Darts? Bodied. Cornhole? Didn’t even faze him. Dunk the clown? Dude shoulda just stayed in the water bc either way he was gonna get there with Gyomei throwing strikes every time. He was doing so well that carnies were getting mad. Not only that a crowd had eventually formed around him; watching in utter astonishment as the giant man (blind, giant man, was ABSOLUTELY BRUTALIZING THESE GAMES).

More specifically…the dart throwing incident.

Let me set the mood for ya. Kinda give you a bit of a visual explanation as to better explain the where, when, who, for this scene.

The sun had long set, the cool night air filled with laughter and excitement as the fair continued into the evening. Lights, music, the cacophony of peoples voices, and the smell of fried foods are what make up the atmosphere of the game booths and rides. Except for one game at the far end of a long and winding path of fair games. There an unusually large man stood with three darts in his hand. One by one he carefully picked them out and threw them towards the board. Each bullseye had a little red balloon in the center, every line had a number of prizes one could win. But if one were to hit directly in the center they would win a large prize. You had three chances to win a big prize, the target to the left, the target in the middle, and the target to the right. If someone were to hit all three bullseyes they would not only win three big prizes but they also win an extra three chances.

Kyojuro explained the rules to Gyomei and handed him the darts. Not a moment after that three distinct pops could be heard ring out in the surrounding area.

A hush fell over the people who were waiting patiently behind him, even the woman who ran the booth seemed amazed at Gyomie’s win. She allowed him to pick out three large stuffed animals and handed him the darts back.

Once more balloons were blown up and set into position, Gyomei played again.

POP!

The woman turned to see that once again all the balloons had been popped, all three darts sat perfect in the center of each target. She was flabbergasted! She couldn’t even speak, it was rare as it was seeing someone who could hit all three targets but dead center 6 times in a row?!?! She shook her head looking at Gyomei and then back at the board, once more at Gyomei and then again back at the board.

Once she regained her composure she removed the darts, filled the balloons again, and handed the darts to him.

“Well done! Let’s see if you can do it a third!” She said, she eyed him closely as she was sure something was amiss.

Now the line of people behind him turned into a small group surrounding him, they all whispered and talked amongst themselves as they watched him carefully.

Silently Gyomie picked out his darts and threw them one by one.

POP!

The crowd erupted in cheers! He had done it again! The woman now clearly sweating as Gyomie had only spent 1 dollar and had won 9 prizes! Suddenly the people that stood next to him began throwing dollars and quarters at the woman, screaming that she give him the darts and let him play again.

As more commotion began to erupt, more people were gathered to the booth to watch him play. Some of the other fair goers even went as far as placing bets on Gyomie, wagering when the woman running the booth would eventually kick him out as she was running out of balloons and prizes.

Gyomie played a perfect game 6 times before Kyojuro thought it best to go play another game. He won 18 prizes from that game alone😐. They went to the ping pong in a bowl game, he won 12 goldfish.

At the end of the night Gyomie had more prizes THAN ANYONE IN THE HISTORY OF FAIR GAME PLAYERS EVER WON. So many in fact he stood next to the Caterpillar roller coaster for the kids and gave out a toy for every kid that came by.

That night Gyomie became more than a Hashira. He became a martyr, a light for those who had been burned by sleazy fair games, never again would they lose hope as it was he who came and won them all.

13/10 he had an amazing time, but cried when the lady said he was too good and needed to play another game. He felt bad and later came back to apologize and she gave him a hug. He cried once again.

Sanemi Shinazugawa

He is immediately kicked out.

Jk jk but like fr tho👀 he acted a fool.

Not even gonna lie to y’all, yall see this man, no but do y’all really see this man. He is 5 foot 10 inches of pure malice. (He’s soft baby on this inside but this is not important to the story). Straight menace behavior, DO NOT TELL ME IM WRONG.

He cut every line, and when people tried to protest to this he only turned around and glared at them with his cold eyes🥶 most people would stare back and tremble in terror, one man even began to weep as he looked into Sanemi’s eyes. The man later mumbled that he had peered into hell and hell peered back. (The man was traumatized for lack of a better term, needed therapy, he’s doing better now tho).

Sanemi rode every ride and played every game, he even got into a fight with one of the clowns! (In Sanemi’s defense the clown had it coming). But besides all that Sanemi found most enjoyment out of terrifying the other participants on the rides. In one instance, he turned to the woman sitting next to him and offhandedly mentioned that the seat she was sitting in didn’t latch all the way. As it was theses seats for this specific ride had a bit of give to them when you pushed the pull down part of the harness. She instinctively pushed the bar and it moved a bit before clicking, she turned to look at him and before she had the chance to alert the ride operator, the ride began to swing.

Once the ride had finished the woman was convinced her life had nearly ended due to a faulty ride harness. She immediately got off the ride and ran into the crowd, but her fear wasn’t entirely that of the ride’s seats, it was partially because as she started to scream and beg for dear life, Sanemi erupted in laughter. The scariest part was being seated next to him for the entirety of the ride.

This some how only fueled his behavior. Next he wanted to take it to the next level. He wanted to scare everyone, the people on the ride, the operators, even those who weren’t riding. Each ride he got on he made an effort to terrify everyone. Whether it be him yelling that ride was falling apart or dropping pieces of nuts and bolts close to the operators. This only aroused his hunger. He needed to take it one step further.

There is a ride called The Umbrella, The Octopus, The plane ride, whatever you want to call it, it’s the same ride. It’s giant tower that has a bunch of swings hanging from it, first it starts of slow and low to the ground, it is then risen off the ground and high above the pavement in which it begins to swing faster. This is a VERY tame ride compared to others as it isn’t extremely fast and it’s also not extremely high when compared to the Ring of Fire (one of Sanemi’s favorites although it did make him slightly sick) and the Ferris Wheel (got bored and started throwing nuts and bolts off the side, surprisingly didn’t hit anyone but as people noticed what they assumed were parts that had fallen off the ride, left the line in search of something “safer”). Sanemi cut to the front of the line and went to find the perfect swing, one was wrapped in caution tape and the seat belt was no longer there. Quickly and quietly he removed the tape and sat down, wrapping what little remained around his waist as it then would appear he did have a seatbelt on. The operator came by and only glanced at Sanemi before going to start the ride. He sat back and chuckled knowing he was going to enjoy this more out of any other he had been on that day. Slowly the ride started and before long he was hoisted several meters from the ground, swing softly through the cool air. He took in a deep breath to savor the moment, it was relaxing being so far up from the chaos, listening to the music and watching the bright colorful lights. Without a moments notice he slipped from the seat and began to scream.

The people below looked up to one of the most horrifying sights there was to see, up in the air a man hung from his swing, his hands gripping to one of the chains that held the swing. He writhed and kicked his feet as he yelled for someone to help. Most if not all began to scream and point. Others got the attention of the operator who hurriedly tried to lower the ride. Every passenger aboard that night gripped their seats and cried. Soon the whole fair watched with bated breath, parents shielded their children, others ran to get help, most stared in shock. The whole while Sanemi cackled in between screams.

The authorities were notified and by the time they arrived with paramedics on scene, the ride had ended and Sanemi was nowhere to be found. This was because he fled and hid himself within the crowd, he caught up with Kyojuro and Gyomie. He played several games with them, all the while Kyojuro was blissfully unaware of the Sanemi’s failure to abide by the rules of the fair rides the main one being, KEEP HANDS AND FEET INSIDE THE RIDE AT ALL TIMES. (Truth be known, Sanemi did in fact have his hands in the ride with the only exclusion being his entire body).

(Sanemi also wanted to play the strong man big hammer game but Tengen had broken it earlier so it was still under repair. He was a tad disappointed and this is what I choose to believe started this entire fiasco).

10/10 had a glorious time at the fair and might come back again someday, he narrowly avoided being escorted off the premises on several occasions so the fact that he didn’t is considered a win in my book. He also single handedly traumatized, horrified, terrified, and scarred an entire group of people spreading to several rides and the riders, operators, as well as the people below the rides themselves. All of this, without being caught by Kyojuro. Truly inspiring.

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im-a-king-baby · 8 months

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Hey, I love ELYN 😭❤️

So my two fave scenes/ moments were the 'keep of the lake house for now' and 'I've been in love with him since' so any commentary will be amazing. Any extra stuff will be amazing so 🪻please 😊

Hiii <3

Gonna put these 3 under a cut because length

“So hold onto that lake house for a while longer,” he says. “Okay?”

Context: i wrote the majority of the first draft of ELYN for Nanowrimo in 2022 (basically a challenge where you write a 50k novel in the month of November) and then I rewrote and edited it over a bunch of months.

So this chapter was actually very similar to the original draft, except that in Draft 1 all of the vote fallout was in one chapter which had the Simon scene first then the Nils scene. In the editing/developing process all the non-Wilhelm characters grew a lot so I knew I wanted to expand Nil's role, and add some more Felice which meant I could bump Simon into his own chapter.

(there was absolutely not meant to be a giant posting gap between the Nils scene and the Simon scene. To be completely honest if I'd known I was going to need that long to finish the fic off I'd probably have chosen to put the gap immediately after the debate because... tension 😈)

The main places where the Simon scene got extended was in the details - Simon's life and career was not well thought through in draft 1 and a lot of the extra length across the whole fic came from building that up - but the lakehouse beat was always there because it was important that Simon's rehab process had to be something he did independent of Wilhelm, so this idea of Wilhelm offering up this house and Simon rejecting it, then clarifying that it's a 'not yet' but hopefully one day when he's in a better place.

Wilhelm's 'I keep thinking about the last time you went to L.A.' was not in the original and was one of those character beats that didn't come to me until months later, but that really pulled together Wilhelm's feelings at that moment and his reluctance to let Simon leave, and that then led really nicely back into Simon saying hang on to the house, because hopefully its not goodbye this time.

“Keira asked what was different about you,” Simon says. “I said: I fell in love with Wilhelm when I was sixteen, and I have been in love with him every day since.”

Okay so this part was possibly the slowest part of the fic to write mostly because I was still figuring out how to articulate this ending which was meant to be optimistic but not magic-wand-everything's-fixed-now. This line in particular came about because I was trying to find where Simon was sitting emotionally and ended up writing a very short therapy in L.A. scene in which Simon dropped this line and I was immediately like 'well, that has to get into the main story.'

It's a nice parallel to Wilhelm's 'I'm never going to stop being in love with him.' in chapter 8, and it highlights that the issues between them have never been a lack of love or not wanting to be together, it's always been these outside forces that they need to break away from.

Also its one of those lines that you write down and then you read it and you're like 'people are gonna quote this one back at me' and its nice when you get that right 😅

And on that theme, your 🪻 is:

“Do you want to tell me what you’re thinking about?” This is the worst part of therapy. “Wilhelm.” Keira’s eyebrows twitch slightly, which is the only reaction he ever gets and means he’s surprised her. “We haven’t spoken much about Wilhelm, not since you asked if you could text him. Are you ready to tell me more about what happened between you?” “You could check the tabloids.” Her ‘you know that’s not what I meant’ look reminds him of Candace, except that she hasn’t figured out how to also convey ‘and I’m disappointed and you’re exhausting and you’d be nothing without me.’ “I’d like to hear it in your own words.” Simon absolutely can’t look at her. “I fell in love with Wilhelm when I was sixteen,” he says. “And I’ve been in love with him every day since. He’s the one I think about every time I sing a love song. Still. I have slept with - I don’t know, hundreds? - of people since I left Sweden and none of it meant anything, compared to him.” “What was it like, seeing him again?” He’d been drinking steadily in the car on the way to the benefit concert so that he’d be able to smile and read a teleprompter and not just stand there staring but it was a close thing. After his performance they’d swept him into a room where he drank champagne and smiled for the cameras. Wilhelm had touched a fingertip to his bare shoulder and Simon had wanted him so badly it hurt in places he’d thought could no longer feel anything. He doesn’t have words for that, except that it was like being in love. “He showed me I could do this,” Simon says instead. “That I could get out. That these systems we were caught up in weren’t infallible.” She frowns very slightly. “Do you think he spoke out against the monarchy for you?” Maybe? He offered once. On a cold night in his ridiculous scarf in so many words that it was Ayub who figured out what he was getting at after he’d walked away. But, no. “He did it for him. Because he needed it. And I did this for me. But there couldn’t be an ‘us’ before. Because of all those things getting in the way. And now… and maybe we both did it a bit for that. For love. Or whatever.”

#Elyn fic #elyn spoilers #I guess #I mean I assume you've all read it at this point

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centrally-unplanned · 1 year

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Comic Box 1997 End of Evangelion Issue - Archive Scan

Comic Box was a magazine in Japan launched in, from what I can gather, 1982. It was a bit of an ‘alt” magazine - it has an imprint, Comic Box Jr, which focused on doujinshi for example - and would cover anything anime-adjacent, including western films. The October 1997 release of the magazine was dedicated to the release of the End of Evangelion film, and to answering the question “what was the phenomenon called Evangelion?”. Towards that end it features fan submissions, art, comics, essays, all talking about what Eva meant to them. Some are serious, some are fully comedic, way way more than I expected are erotic, and overall it is a time capsule of how the anime community was thinking about Evangelion when EoE came out. The magazine dissolved in 1998 from what I can tell, so this was one of its last releases - you can still see its absolutely vintage website here! Complete with dashing chibi cat gif.

I discovered this magazine through japanese anime/manga archivist-in-residence ehoba on twitter, who provided photos and rough summaries of some of the pages. They are just camera photos of an open magazine though, not scans, and not at all complete. I hunted around for a while to find a scanned version, messaged ehoba and a few others, posted on forums like Evageeks, and drew total blanks. I couldn’t find any listings of it online, so I set the quest aside...until I was placing another order for some artbooks for import and decide to check Yahoo Auctions Japan and lo and behold, there is was! It arrived this week.

So that image above is not one pulled from the internet - I have scanned the entire Evangelion segment of Comic Box - October 1997 issue. I am a neophyte scanner & image editor, these aren’t gonna be amazing or anything, but while I hope to make a more polished version I wanted to share the drafts now. I really aspire to translate it, but of course I don’t speak Japanese, so I am going to see how far working with some people I know and brute-forcing with AI would go. If you are interested or know someone who would be, definitely reach out! 100% would crowdsource this. If someone already scanned and translated this, also let me know, I would groan heavily and curse my google skills but i’d rather it be available and know, and not waste time.

Below will be some reduced-down PNG’s of the magazine to fit Tumblr image limits with Ehoba’s notes and a few of my own attached to them. A link to the full images as a singular PDF is on the Internet Archive [Here]

A reflection of a very known thing in this magazine is that, from my perspective, End of Evangelion is definitely Asuka’s moment to shine, but it didn’t matter because the 90′s Eva fandom *loved* Rei. She was the most popular by far, and I think dethroned Sailor Mercury on the ‘best girl’ polls in magazines of the era. Nowadays if you poll audiences - as the NHK did recently - Asuka is the most popular girl, but it was a different, proto-moe-boom time.

"Evangelion was fake. A fake made by one director, or by the staff. However, it was a very real fake. God, it was so good."

Watermelon Kaji absolute goat here; so cool indeed

How much Asuka is suffering in all these images vs god-salvation Rei is, again, saying alot about the waifu wars.

"I don't think episode 25 and 26 were professional work. I understand that the ADR script and previews with layout sheets are supposed to be avant-garde, but something is wrong with it." "TV show is not an individual's job, so I wanted them to deal with the schedule limitation."

90% sure this Asuka ‘escaped’ and I saw it on the internet in the early 2000′s - maybe the author published it elsewhere in a doujin, I assume a lot of this art would have been repurposed for other mediums.

Honestly the art is incredible for this magazine sometimes, the splash pages they have are filled with Evangelion’s anime-spiritual energy.

"Unit 02 has a mouth, which means it can give a blow job." "The biggest surprise is Rei in cowgirl position. The official content does that, so hentai authors have nothing to do."

(Gainax putting hard-working hentai doujin authors out of a job, what assholes!)

"My heated up feeling toward Evangelion was quick-freezed by episode 25 and 26. EoE defrosted it, but now I feel distant from Evangelion."

How much Episode 25-26 come up here is great evidence for how divisive they were - End of Eva is absolutely seen as commentary on, and opposition to, the TV ending. I think in the west the initial reception of the original ending is overall more positive? Certainly nowadays, would be curious how it is seen in Japan today.

OCR’ing this image will literally murder me, pls I can’t

"Bullshit plot, surficial information, shallow dialogues, inconsistent direction, story with tons of plot holes, the director's masturbation, the otaku's useless attempt to enlighten other otaku..." "BUT I LOVE IT."

10/10 take

"'Sincerity' of someone I don't like just confirms that I still don't like them. Anno apparently thought that honest depiction of himself can be depiction of otaku, but that's not wrong. Anno is exceptionally creepy."

God-tier Anno portrait here. I love how many of this art showcases “settings” from End of Eva and which ones hit the audience - re-using the movie theatre seats for Shinji, that is really cool!

Evangelion - Slayers edition! The artist names are in the black box panel on the page lining, I absolutely hope to track down a few of them and see what kind of works they made.

"I think each material of Evangelion was nothing new. In the early half, however, I was moved by their techniques of arranging and remixing those materials." "Creators' strong desire for expression supported this story, but I'm not sure."

"Adam and Eve in the Eden East" "I hope they will live happily after the ending."

"The theater was like a funeral after the screening. No, I should say it was a literal funeral. Evangelion ended, it died. In terms of entertainment, Evangelion was completely and brilliantly killed."

Kaworu’s insta-inclusion into the ranks of the kid cast is always amusing to me; he is in one episode of the show after all, barely in Eva! But he is all over the art immediately. The power of design - and also being one of the first gay characters on television (as opposed to OVA’s) in Japan.

Hopefully if I can make progress on translation I can have actual thoughts to add to the scan, certainly I will post results if I get them.

I value, way too deeply to be honest, the preservation of the other side of the ‘media mix’ - how people responded to the media in question and what it meant to them. It is way more likely to be lost than the media itself or documents from the production side. May this contribution to preserving a bit of that experience be of value to those out there who would be interested in the history of Evangelion, and anime more generally.

If you think you know anyone or your followers overall would be interested in translation help, I would appreciate the broadcasting!

#evangelion #anime archives #90's anime zeitgeist

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iamamythologicalcreature · 9 months

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Can I be real for a second?

I’ve gone back and forth in my head about whether or not to post about this very real side of me online or not. There’s nothing shameful about being disabled, but I don’t want to be known as my disability, either. I don’t want that to be my identity.

But I’m hoping to post some of my writing tomorrow for Six Sentence Sunday. Post something I’ve written, albeit just a small bit, online where anyone can see it. It will be the first time I’ve done so since the car accident three years ago. And the truth is, the terrible truth is, my writing is what hurts the most.

Stories have always been a part of my life. They have always been my motivation, why I slogged through everything else - my reason for existing. I wrote novels and hoped to publish, and I fell in love with the writing community and made it my home. I volunteered and organized events. I created an extremely successful and fulfilling teen writing club where I taught creative writing. I was in love with stories, and writing them. I have never not been in love with stories.

(Before I was a writer I was an artist. I’m not going to go into that part of my life in detail, but it was just as heavily affected.)

At the beginning of 2020 I was in a car accident. The driver at fault was pulling out of a bar parking lot in the middle of the day. Make of that what you will. The accident he caused left me with more than a few issues, but for this post I’m focusing on the vision impairment.

Because of COVID, I wasn’t able to seek any diagnosis or treatment until June. I didn’t even begin physical therapy until August. Due to a myriad of issues and unfortunate reasons, I couldn’t complete my treatment. That meant a year and a half of work and struggle went down the drain.

This continues to affect me in many ways. Sometimes it’s things that you might expect - I can’t read Tumblr, or books, most days. Some limitations are less obvious, like how I’m afraid to ask questions (e.g. “what kind of car did Fiona drive?”) because the resources to find the answers myself are out there. Why don’t I just google it? Or reference that amazing spreadsheet someone did? Why am I asking other people to do the work for me? Am I just lazy?

People don’t mean to judge (and I’m sure there are plenty who don’t). But my issues aren’t apparent, so they won’t know unless I take the time to explain it. Able-eyed people should be able to find these simple answers. Just look in the book.

So I don’t ask. Or I apologize a lot for asking. Because it’s just too hard to explain why I need such basic help. (And sadly, some people still don’t believe me and treat me as thought I’m making excuses.)

I lost most of my friends simply for being unable to chat online, particularly during lockdown. I kept three people in my life - the three people willing to break with their comfort zones and talk to me on the phone instead of via text or chat. Those people probably saved my life. I know everyone went through isolation issues in 2020. But I went through them unable to even use a computer or read a book.

Since I’m typing this, you can guess that I’ve recovered somewhat, or made some accommodations that help. Yes. I have. Both of those. But I still have more bad days than good. Typing too long, or playing a phone game, surfing Tumblr - anything done for too long can break my eyes and send me back into total isolation for days.

I was a really good writer. I would regularly write 10-20k every weekend, and I wrote well. I wrote great stuff. (Rough drafts are always rough drafts, but I felt good about what I wrote.) I would sink into a character and go for hours.

Here’s the part that’s relevant to me now: I can’t do that anymore. I can’t write for hours, I can’t take the time to slip into character. I’m doing really well if I can pound out a speedy 1k in 30 minutes and have it not break my eyes. (It usually breaks my eyes.)

If you’re a writer, though - or any kind of creative - you know that the need doesn’t just go away.

(I have tried to record notes on my phone, but I just cannot dictate writing fiction. Only my fingers know how to speak well, and in character. And no, I’m not going to learn braille. It would not be helpful.)

So I’m going to try to write. It’s going to suck, because the things I did to write well before are things I can’t do anymore. I will cry. And then I will wait a week or however long it takes for my eyes to chill the fuck out, and I’ll try again.

(I’ve also started treatment again, just this month. I have to start at square one again, which means it will get worse before it gets better. It will take time, and money - lots of both. Like years. But I can’t give up.)

Anyway. This is why I chose the Simon Snow fandom to try again, for the first time in forever. Because that’s the story, and those are the characters, and these are the people. I know it. So. Hi.

#this is real #some real me stuff in between the fun fandom fluff #reality of disability #actually disabled #vision impairment #keep on #carry on #simon snow series #fandom community #open for voice chat cause really...#questions accepted here #gulp here I go posting now

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mindvice · 10 days

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Now that I’ve had a good chance to listen through the album multiple times, here are my thoughts, in a random messy order similar to the album itself 🙃

Overall it’s okay. It’s not a horrible album but it’s definitely one of my least favorites.

Half of the songs could be cut. A lot of the good songs could be even better with some more polishing. In a way it feels like a first draft?

It’s hard to get past this being a Matty album. I’m not a fan of his and I really don’t get why she seems more into him than the guy she was with for 6 years.

Speaking of Joe, I hope this album isn’t the first time he’s hearing about Taylor’s Matty fantasies. Guilty as sin? Yeah, maybe. Emotional cheating is still cheating.

That said, the masturbation song is really catchy

If I were Matty, I’d be a little weirded out by how obsessed Taylor is with him. But maybe that’s something he’s into. I wouldn’t be surprised if they get together again at some point.

She’s kind of saying she’d leave Travis for Matty if given the chance huh 🤔 Wonder if Travis has really listened to the full album and what he thinks of it.

Post Malone is so underutilized in Fortnight. I was hoping for something more like exile/coney island

Most of the songs I like are from The Anthology, probably because of Aaron Dessner

I feel like if Joe is going to only get a few songs, they better be amazing. So Long, London lacks the emotion I wanted.

Clara Bow is decent but feels so out of place. It reminds me of Olivia Rodrigo (as well as imgonnagetyouback obviously)

My top 3 (for now): I Hate It Here, I Look In People’s Windows, imgonnagetyouback

But if you had asked me earlier I really liked these too: Down Bad, Guilty As Sin?, The Black Dog

I hate the emphasis on Joe’s mental health. Looking back on her older songs, it seems like it was always an issue for her

Is it possible Joe didn’t want to marry Taylor partly because he knew she loved Matty? I don’t want to ruin the previous albums for myself but pretty sure there have been more songs about him than I realized

I wish I didn’t know so much of the Taylor lore. I think casual fans who know nothing about her personal life might enjoy the album more.

The Kim K song was unnecessary

The Alchemy and So High School are so cringe. But even though I don’t like Travis, I prefer him to Matty

I’ve been called out in But Daddy I Love Him. I didn’t sign that petition or anything but yeah I have no regrets about disapproving of someone who’s made racist and misogynistic comments.

I know a lot of people are comparing this album to Midnights. I haven’t been able to decide which one I prefer yet

I do agree that this is one of Taylor’s most honest and vulnerable albums.

“Lights, camera, bitch smile” is going to be my new affirmation

As parasocial as it is, I really do hope Taylor finds whatever she’s looking for, which I guess now seems to be marriage and children. But I think she has too much baggage from these past relationships that only time and therapy can fix

This photo is STUNNING. Why wasn’t this the album cover? Why don’t the other photos and the music match this aesthetic more?

Also here’s what I’d pick for the album (tracklist in this order):

I Can Do It With a Broken Heart

Guilty As Sin?

But Daddy I Love Him

Down Bad

loml

The Black Dog

I Look In People’s Windows

I Hate It Here

The Albatross

Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me?

imgonnagetyouback

Peter

The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived

The Prophecy

How Did It End?

Also I love the chorus of Who’s Afraid of Little Old Me. As a big MCU/Scarlet Witch fan it instantly made me think of this part of WandaVision:

#honest review #plenty more thoughts but this post is getting long #taylor swift #ttpd #gif #joe alwyn #rambling

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nanowrimo · 1 year

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5 Tips to Getting to 50k Words

It’s the middle of NaNoWriMo, and the race to the finish may start to feel daunting! NaNo Participant Lori Chick has a few tips on staying motivated so you reach your word count goal. So, you’re a few weeks into NaNo, and you have just realized that 50k is a lot of words. It seems interminable and impossible and it’s stressing you out. Don’t. Don’t stress. NaNo is for fun and to challenge us and I can promise you, outside of real life (stupid real life ruining everything) issues, you can ABSOLUTELY hit your 50k. Honestly, your biggest obstacle is probably the anxiety and stress about writing 50k words in a month.

Thing is, the best way to hit 50k words is just to sit down and write. JUST write. Don’t edit, don’t look back at what you wrote, or research anything. Yes, I know, it means that what you’re going to end up with will be messy and contradictory and have plot holes a mile wide. But you know what? That doesn’t matter. Your challenge isn’t to complete a publisher worthy novel in one month — It’s to write 50k words in a month. I promise you, there are no authors, no matter how amazing and talented, who have a publishable novel in one month. NONE. It’s impossible. So you need to breathe and let that utterly absurd idea go. You’re not here to write the next great novel. You’re here to put the words on the pages. That’s it, that’s all. Just write words, one after another, until you hit 50k. Alright: now that we have that foolish expectation that was gnawing at you and destroying your word count dealt with — how do we get those words? 1. Stop Editing, Stop Researching Don’t do anything that isn’t putting words on the page. When you finish a sentence, write the next one. If you have to pause and think, then do that. Think about what happens next and write that. Or go off on a tangent who knows, maybe there’s gold off in those unknown hills. Explore, have fun, give yourself permission to write whatever comes into your head. Remember this is a novel — but it is not a finished and edited novel. This is your first draft. I might even say it’s your pre first draft. You’re writing down your ideas and fleshing out your characters and your world. Hell, you can have a full 50k just about your world. That’s okay too. 2. Kill your criticism. Bonk it over the head with the Traveling Shovel of Death and have Mr. Ian Woon bury it in your backyard. Mary Sue/Gary Lou? Who cares? Plot holes? Those are just opportunities to fill in with whatever weird crap you want. Stuck? Throw in a murder, some aliens, ninjas, pirates or whatever your heart desires. It doesn’t have to make sense. It just has to be fun. You can break ALL the writerly rules and I’ll let you in on a secret: almost every author who gets published breaks them ALL the time. Writing rules aren’t even rules (more like a vague guide), and they absolutely should not be walls. 3. Destroy distractions. You love your family, your friends, but tell them to buzz off for the month. If they really want they can run errands for you, but no, you don’t need to watch a crappy movie, or drink overpriced coffee in a noisy crowded franchise, you have 50k words to write. The only function of family and friends during NaNo is support staff to keep your butt in the chair and hold you while you sob uncontrollably after hitting a wall (while making sure you somehow eat, drink and sleep — at least some of those three). If they’re NaNo-ing with you, they’re your friendly challengers, make good use of that. All in all, family is a wonderful source of support, but distractions are the enemy. 4. Get a writing buddy (or more!) It is a huge help to write with other people. There’s a reason NaNo has Liaisons, it’s because it’s a LOT easier to hit 50k when you’re in a group who are all cheering each other on. Racing against a friend is great motivation, and the bonus is, even if you are racing, it still isn’t a cut throat competition, because you’re hoping that everyone hits 50k. So gather a group, challenge each other, go to the forums and get an adoptable NPC, plot twist or other. Ask for advice when you get stuck, and if your stress gets too high, vent. Yes, I know I said you should only be writing, but let’s be honest, that’s as likely to happen as you eating right and getting more active after a doctor’s visit. Do the best you can. 5. Have Fun. NaNo isn’t supposed to destroy your mental health or your life. It’s meant to be a fun challenge, something to be proud of and to join with people around the world in a fevered ambitious attempt to fill up the ever yawning gap of digital space with words and ideas. Life is sometimes hard, we have mental health issues, many have children or financial issues. If you can’t make that 50k, don’t feel awful. Cut yourself some slack and admit that maybe it isn’t happening this year, and that’s okay. While your word count is important, YOU are more important. After all, you can’t hit 50k next year if you’re burned out this year.

Lori Chick is a Freelance Games Journalist who’s been reviewing, criticizing and ranting for four years for different outlets and a beta reader who’s seen two novels into publication. She lives with her husband, four adult chosen family and three cats of varying degrees of floofiness. Photo by Prateek Katyal on Unsplash

#nanowrimo #writing #writing advice #writing motivation #by nano guest #lori chick #writing goals

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