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#GOD it ALWAYS makes me SO MAD when people make her skinny
arkantolas · 9 months
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people who draw mae borowski as skinny are cowards mae is CANONICALLY FAT SHE IS LITERALLY PLUS SIZED GET IT RIGHT YOU COWARDS AND FOOLS
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mejomonster · 1 year
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Just watched till the end of the moon ep 9:
I'm so down bad for these 2
I cannot stress enough that skipping them to marriage so no stupid "innocence" or naivety stuff as is the usual situation is here
I cannot stress enough how much I LOVE that li susu seems adult, mature, seasoned in battle love etc, and just generally like a late 20s early 30s adult trying to save the world instead of a young adult Hero and how nice it is. Just for me, I'm happy for the variety
I LOVE tantai jin. He's a fucked up guy. He's the wet skinny pathetic man fangirls always say they want. He's genuinely a pretty cold bitch AND he gets to be lead (in a cdrama!). He is monstrous cause bitches have treated him monstrous so like susu said! He responded to a cruel world with cruelty back. It's not a lead I'm used to but I AM loving it. I also love how for him a kind gesture really is worth it's weight in gold like? For him. As awful as ye xiwu was in marriage pre susu, as much as susu literally said she wants to kill him more than anyone else in the world... she keeps saving him. Giving him food. Risking HER life for his. And for him those specific actions are worth more than anything anyone's ever given him. Maybe even more than what Lan gave him, since at least ye xiwu is upfront about wanting to imprison him and being mad at him so like she probably isn't going to "secretly" betray him since she's fairly honest (now). I love that he is JUST a fucked up guy with a fucked up destiny meant to be devil God, who the universe was probably intentionally shitty to cause its hoping (on like a cosmic scale) he will Suffer and Die and become devil God in revenge. I love that its not trying to make the bitch noble. He is who he is. For whatever that means, it's just a story about 2 people who'd never have met. But susu has changed the trajectory just by being herself around him and it's COMPELLING.
The transformative power of love (or simply being kind to another person) and all that. How the cursed jade said she's mostly just SO SURPRISED someone would help another person. I feel like that's probably the Theme of the show right there. Even susu is probably surprised by herself helping him. And in the jade transfer moment, I think she's surprised she genuinely does NOT think he only is comprised of bad traits. For all the cold bitch that he is, betraying her that he's done, cruel view he has of the world... actions speak louder than words to susu too. And for all the bad he's done... he has also done some good things. And she finds herself seeing him in shades of grey instead of a monster like she expected to.
I just love their bickering lets be real. Susu just SAYS shit on the top of her mind (to be fair tantai jin is a bitch and deserves to be bitched at). But she's like "from now on let's have NO CONNECTION" to 6 hours later being like "your life is in my hands and I say when you can die I'm imprisoning you forever ill see you nonstop bitch." And it's like... susu honey, that was LITERALLY tantai jins plan to do to you like 6 hours ago. Yall have the same plan. Just who's the prisoner is switched lmao. No wonder he's oddly attracted to you. You see him being a big manipulative bitch and like you're not stealthy, but you ARE like "WELL FINE ill say some SHIT and BREAK YOUR HEART then. Cry me a river! Oh you thought I was dead? You cried? GOOD. Now anyway fight is over as long as I'm winning!"
Their emotional fights are both ridiculously huge (like rumor of the Kingdoms wild) but also so shallow cause these bitches will be like "I DECIDE when you DIE" then you find them clutching each other in the woods BOTH unwilling to abandon the other and BOTH taking life threatening damage trying to protect the other and BOTH trying to then heal said damage of each others! Like. That's just so fucking funny??!! And fun. Xiao Lin is going to be like "what in the world??" But move on
Anyway speaking of Xiao Lin: I love how he genuinely seems to care for tantai jin! Probably only person in the world who does! I hope one day tantai jin finds out its genuine heartfelt care for him. Buy knowing tantai jins life... he's going to do some awful shit to Xiao lin that ruins his life or kills his wife or kills thousands of innocents in front of him, THEN Xiao lin will be breaking down crying how he never thought tantai jin would do this and he thought tantai jin was a good person who wanted to avoid seeing the ppl in harm and he always wished tantai jin could have a better life. And then tantai jin, probably newly learning compassion from enough bullshit attempts with susu, that his own heart will be breaking BECAUSE of the consequences of his own actions. So. Thrilled to cry later I guess
Speaking of susu and tantai jin. tantai jin LAYING ON HER SHOULDER THINKING ABOUT WHAT SHE BULLSHITTINGLY SAID LOVE WAS AND HOW HE THINKS SHE LOVES HIM AND HOW HE THINKS HE MIGHT LOVE HER AND CUDDLING
that is what watchers want!! (At least me!!) Men lying heads on their lovers shoulders and thinking dreamy about them
Bai Lu gives off such bisexual lead energy tho even without a woman to flirt with I'm sure thats part of the appeal for me. Bottom line is I like in my b/g romances on occasion (who am I kidding more of the time than not) to have a dominant kind of woman. And bai lu delivers. Her man leans on HER shoulder. Is carried around her shoulder with HER arms.
Speaking of, people who cast this were 1. Fulfilling so many wishes letting Luo yunxi just play PURE FUCKED UP and I love it. 2. By casting him as this suffering Weak physically nearly always dying willfully little skinny twink of a man, who's also God tier powerful especially with rage, who's costume entails constant bloody whump, collars, choking and ropes, like. There's a HELLA SPECIFIC NICHE Luo yunxis character resides inside this show and it sure is feeding That Demographic. I'm up for it. It's like if mo ran and chu wanning had a fucked up mashup
I'm fearing the jade maker witch was somehow susu in a past life and now I'm wondering if time travel is gonna be in this bitch
If there IS time travel? I really like the idea of tantai jin specifically time traveling the 2nd time around, once he and susu fell in love, once he knows what susu knew from the beginning. I think that could open a lot of new avenues that he is not currently able to go into given his current personality and knowledge
It's still funny as hell to me tantai jin is kind of angling for death cause he KNOWS he gets super-powered once he dies. But his wife keeps being like NO BITCH YOU GOTTA LIVE WELL. And I'm hoping eventually he's like: maybe she's right... maybe the revenge means more if I'm alive for it and not dissassociated. Maybe I SHOULD try to become a God tier monster without dying. Which would still lead to oh no devil tantai jin lol, but a version of it that is fully Himself which I would like
You know I'm liking a show when I'm contemplating binging beyond what's on youtube rn
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skywalkerbae · 1 year
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The boy from nevermore
I do not support percy, I no longer write for Xavier.
This is from an ask and I had so much fun writing this (If you want to be on my taglist please send me a message or comment on this) I think i'm gonna do a part two on this
Xavier thorpe x Fem!Addams!Reader
Part 1/?
Warnings: SMUT, Unprotected sex, pet names, praises, swearing, (idk what else)
Words: 1.2k
Having a sister that everyone was scared of wasn't easy. I mean you loved your sister, even though she was always mean or shallow with people you always found a way to make her smile. So you weren’t surprised when she was pissed off on going to nevermore, I mean who could blame her you had to go there too for what? Just because you were defending your little brother? 
But compared to Wednesday you weren’t that mad about going to nevermore you were kind of excited. Meeting new people, learning new stuff and maybe meeting some boys.You always tried to find the perfect guy for your sister but she always ended up scaring them off or hurting them... not mentally, physically. So to your surprise when she started talking to this boy Tyler when we got here. He was tall, handsome and sweet which surprised you, you thought your sister was going to end up with a killer of some sort.
Well enough about her, when you got here you met this tall, skinny, hot guy. His name was Xavier, you guys met when Enid was showing you the school (Wednesday was off trying to get out of nevermore) he was nice and didn’t talk much he was a bit shy but handsome so you guys started hanging out.
He was fun to hang around with you would always go away to his shed to talk, work or draw but after a while, you started developing feelings for him which wasn't very smart on your part because he was dating Bianca. They were on and off but almost every subject started with “Bianca is such a bitch” or “I think I love her” he was a complicated boy you would say.Here you were on his bed next to him talking about Bianca, they just had a fight about how she was using him for popularity and he didn’t want any part in it. “And she kept saying that I was crazy and that I was overreacting” he signed “god I hate her” he starts rubbing his face with his hands “it's not the first time you've said that” you mumble silently hoping he didn’t hear “wait what did you say” thank god “nothing” he sits up to look at you “ what did you say y/n,” he says in a stern voice “I just said that it's not the first time you've said that” “what is that supposed to mean?” he questions, you could see from the look on his face that he was confused. “Just that every time we hang out it's always about Bianca and it's getting really fucking annoying, why don't we talk about plants or something I would prefer doing that than talking about your stupid girlfriend.”He goes silent. “I didn’t think you cared,” he says emotionless “why wouldn't I care I mean you keep talking about how perfect or how shitty she is while I'm just here listening to all of your problems and waiting for you too fucking realize that I like you but no you could never like me back because you like girls like Bianca or Wednesday.” you finish off your sentence pissed and frustrated, as you're about to leave Xavier asks “You like me?” “No shit.” He signs and walks over to me “I’m sorry, I like you too and well I’m- I was dating Bianca to make you jealous and the Wednesday thing was just out of curiosity.” he says sincerely "You like me back?" You question "How could I not?" He says as he leans in for a kiss, it was a long one not like a quick peck it was more meaningful as if you were waiting your whole life for that kiss. 
He puts his hand on your cheek and leans back to say “I’ve been waiting a long time to do that.” He leans back in and kisses you passionately, his lips are soft and wet. He grabs the back of your head and leans you in closer. You can feel his bulge resting on your thigh, you move your hands towards his crotch and you start stroking his length. He groans into your mouth "fuck sweetheart, yeah just like that" he says moaning into your mouth.He pushes you onto the wall and says "you're gonna be good for me yeah?" You mumble a yes as you lean in to kiss his puffy lips before you can reach him he pushes you back on the wall "I'm in charge you do as you're told, understand?" "Yes sir," you say and he groans at the name you gave him. His hand touches your thigh you let out a small gasp at the sensation of his cold fingers rubbing your skin.
He moves his hand upwards until he reaches your lacy underwear. He rubs your clit on the outside of the fabric and you whine needing more than just a few touches “more please” he removes his hand and grabs your face “you take what I give you, is that understood?” He asks. You whisper a quiet yes and he moves his hand where it had previously been.
Instead of continuing his previous actions, he removes your skirt and underwear after doing that he rips your blouse off. Xavier guides you to the bed, he pushes you on it. “Are you gonna be a good girl for me?” “Yes just please touch me” "As you wish," he says just before he plunges two fingers inside your cunt, you moan at the sensation. "Does that feel good?" he asks teasing. You can't even respond, you just focus on his long fingers pushing in and out of you slowly. His movements slow down and you whine at the loss of stimulation “you didn’t answer me” he says in an angry tone "yes" you say out of breath "yes it does, please do that again" you plead looking at him with a pout on your lips.
"I'll give you something better than that," he says pulling his pants as well as his boxers revealing his whole member. He's long, really long maybe 8 inches. He sees you staring and says "I know what your thinking but we'll have to leave that for next time," he says as he climbs into the bed. "Next time?" You ask, he doesn't answer he just gently taps his tip on your clit while stroking himself. "Tell me how bad you want it," he says giving you that god-awful grin. "Please Xavi, I want your cock so bad," you speak with a pout on your lips. He gives in an enters you slowly but with ease. He bottoms out and says “you okay?” reassuring me that I’m still okay with what was happening at that moment “yeah” you choke out with a moan following along. He starts moving and it doesn’t take long for him to thrust harder and faster. You could feel your body getting hot and Xavier’s praises weren’t helping much. “You're such a good girl for me” “you like that?” “Taking me so well” you knew he would get mad if you didn't answer him so you just nodded lazily. You could feel your orgasm approaching soon and Xavier knew because a few seconds later he put his hand on your clit, moving his skilled fingers in a circle. “Xavier I’m gonna cum” you moan out “cum with me sweetheart” and then just like that a euphoric feeling came over you as you squeezed his cock not thinking you could ever let him go. Your orgasm helped Xavier and not long after he came inside of you.
He pulled out and pushed his body next to yours “you still think I like Bianca?”
Taglist:
@dilfxfinder 
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papirouge · 9 months
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im the jpop anon. thank you for the long and thoughtful reply! :)
yeah, theres something really wrong with kpoppers. i actually remember what perfume video the "fat legs" comments were from - it was their first budokan concert back in 2008, i think they were wearing the pink outfits (or perhaps the yellow ones from drream fighter). i think what those kpoppers might meant were kashiyukas thighs, since she wore very short shorts in the pink outfits, and while her legs are thin her thighs are plumper. but like, thats literally what makes her known as "the hot one" among fans. like shes very renowed for having very nice legs, and in general its normal for women to have bigger tighs and wider hips. i guess one could just shrug it off as kpop fans being salty and petty, but many kpop girl members have crazy thin legs. like if you look up snsd aka girls generation, youll realize that many of their promotional images have them with really skinny legs. one of the very few kpop songs that i like is "gee" by this girl group, and i decided to look at the comments of the dance ver and some poeple were defending one of the girls because koreans fans were being mean to her for being "fat". i think she was called jessica or something like that, and i look her up to know which one of them was and like, if they didnt mention anything i wouldnt even have realized but her "problem" was basically that she had this "square-y" body type and that made her look like 0,5 millimeters bigger that the rest.
another thing that happened to me very recently was that i was looking for a notebook to buy and there were selling some with kpop groups in the cover, and i stumbled upon one that had this boy band named stray kids, and god dammit... these guys have such heavy plastic surgery like wtf... some of them look like literal wax figures its scary. i remember when kpop fans were saying it was racist how some people made fun of boy bands by saying they all looked the same, and sure, definitely some of them probably were, but you cant deny that some of these guys (and girls) dont end up looking the same when they get their faces botched up all to follow the same very narrow korean beauty standards.
and yeah, i can see the difference between kanon and akari, but i also think it was because kanon was much bigger than akari. like she even made fun of herselkf many times when she introduced herself. i always remember when michishige sayumi was asked which animal fit their teammates the best, and she said kanon was a hippo or an elephant 💀 i always got the impression that kanon making fun of herself like referencing she had a full meal before a performance so she was full of energy was a defense mechanism - a lot of fat people usually make fun of themseves because they want to do it before others can make fun of them first, like "look at me, im fat and i know it and dont take it seriously, please dont make fun of me because i already do it and it doesnt hurt me at all!".
speaking of sayumi, she once was also asked which helloproject group she would least like to be stuck with on an island, and she said berryz koubou because they seemed like they liked to eat alot.. im guessing she was referring to maasa and risako.
i wanted to say more but this got so fucking long lol sorry papi... perhaps ill send another message later...
Tbh Kpop visuals are so ridiculously filtered that I'm pretty sure those girls are made prettier and skinnier than they really are. People these days are soooooo freaking guillible and believe anything they see online. These girls get ps to oblivion and still need to be photoshopped like mad.... They're not perfect. Nobody is.
The thing is japanese idols aren't expected to look perfect like Korean do. Jpop idols aren't supposed to look 'flawless'. Perfume debuted when they were like 12-13 years old ; we saw them grow before our eyes, so if they did anything shady with their appareance everyone would have noticed. These women are soon 35 and still kicking.. - I wonder how these Kpop girls will look at that age 👀
I don't even think that Kpoppers know what "sexy" is anyway. What's stricking with Kpop is that despite how much polished their aesthetic are, they emanate 0% charisma. They give off an absolutely frigid energy. Every single of their move and face expression are policed. Kpop MV would make anyone epileptic so much shit is going on because that's how bad the artist themselves can't put it up themselves.
At least, old school jpop idols still have a lil bit of personality - which is why we still remember of them 10, 20 years later. The same couldn't be said for today's one tbh (I lost interest after Morning Musume 13./Michishige graduated because all the newcomers were more dull than the others... Even Riho who was hailed as The Ace of the group didn't leave the same impact as OG members (Ai Takashi, Tsuji Nozomi, Ai Kago, Maki Goto, Reina Tanaka, etc.) AKB48 fell off after the Kami 7 all graduated (the sister groups are meh).
But to be fair, the new Reiwa era (more conservative ) isn't just prone to leave raw personalities pop out in like that... Ai Kago stunts would have made her cancelled without afterthought or second chances today...😬 The idol group era is pretty much over in Japan. Right now, 'boring edgy' like Aimyon or Yonezu Kenshi are popping.
I can't bring myself to find Kpop boys attractive. Period. They are all ugly and I have no shame to say it because they were all much better before doing plastic surgery. So no it's not racist to say they all look the same because plastic surgery made them look the same - not their race...
I DARE someone to tell me the 2 dudes on the left aren't the same. The one at the top particularly looks like an otome game character 💀 like- he straight up looks like his face was DRAWN.
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And you know what freaks me out the most? It's that from one picture to another THEY DON'T LOOK LIKE THEMSELVES??!?
Like wtf is this shit???
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It's supposed to be the same band but the faces.... don't match others pictures 💀
You know society colllapsed now that stray kid dudes are considered attractive....when back in the day we had natural and authentic beauty like Takeshi Kaneshiro *sigh*
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downgrade of the millennium. Mishima killed himself for this.
And you know what freaks me out the most about these kpoppers? It's that they seemingly don't "exist" beside these ridiculous doctored photoshoot. Are there any candids of them out and about in the street? Without perfect lightening, angle and filters? Tbh I wouldn't be surprised they are AI or shit like that.
Perfume look the same when they do bc....they arent botched
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Michishige is RUTHLESS 😭 I mean, in Morning Musume she had the persona of being a narcissist so it makes sense she put down other girls for not being as pretty as her. But yeah dunking on a girl who's like a decade younger than you is shitty. Those idol group are shoving together girls from entire different generations (Michishige was in her mid 20s when she graduated and the youngest member of the group were like 13-14 years old 🥴) so awkward girldrama situations are bound to happen.... That being said, it's a very bad idea to get into an idol group if you're feeling awkward about your physically appearance... Kanon should've never been in Momusu, imo.
I always found Berryz Kōbō was much coherent than Morning Musume ; members were closer in age and experience. I was a smaller band and the lineup was consistent so you weren't lost in the amount of new faces every other years (like Momusu regular call for new members).
I think its fitting that some of its members love eating when they have a song called 1億3千万総ダイエット王国 ("A kindgom of 130 million [people] complete diet[ing]") *the population of Japan is of 125 million but I guess the evened it out for the song that was kinda critical of diet culture. Good for them tbh And that song was bop. Berryz Kōbō truly delivered the few years before disbanding.
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staygoldson4lyfe-blog · 9 months
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I may have just made up this whole delusion in my head but why does it feel so real. I swear on my life this is the first time I’ve legitimately felt feeling jealous. It’s not like I didn’t know what jealousy was but I’ve never related to girls who constantly worry or check social media and do all the fbi shit. Like seriously I’ve always been very secure up until now. So the question is why am I feeling like this? Lack of reassurance I’m sure but it’s more than that. I want to trust him so badly but mind won’t let me fully do it. Okay okay fuck let me just get into it because I’m avoiding talking about it even to myself. So ever since we started getting kind of serious I’ve been checking his IG following. And this checking thing started out fairly innocently. I started checking when I met his friends in person for the first time, so I’d check his following to find out more about his friends and who they were now that I could match names and faces. In the beginning I’d notice girls that were not in his friend group in his following and never thought too much about it. That was that for the past month or so. Now we know that people who are closer to the top are people that you added most recently or interact with the most. So in the beginning I was fine with the other random girls being near the top cuz I was like ‘oh we just started dating, these are probably other girls he went on dates with same time as me’ fair, no problem. So eventually these girls would drop down and not be at the top and it was only his friend group near the top… i was sighing with relief because it was starting to normalize like ok he’s just about me now. But todayyy TODAY I lurked a lil to hard and hurt my damn self.
So im checking his following and this one girl who use to be near the top fell to the middle is now back at the top. And not like top but TOP like above his friend group. Imagine the shock on my face. So I go to her profile and of course she’s beautiful and everything I’m not OF COURSE OF COURSE. And this couldn’t have happened at a worse time in my life. I’m battling my self image really hard lately, I don’t even feel like myself and here comes this bitch who’s everything I’m not. Not meaning to be rude, I’m sure she’s a lovely lady but she’s light eyes, long hair, naturally skinny and I kind of want to blow my brains out. Tears sting my eyes as I type this. Like I’m not even mad that he’s following her. He’s following a lot of nice looking girls I’m not THAT insecure (yet) it’s the fact that she seems like the full package and she NEAR THE TOP OF THE FOLLOWING like lmao idkkkk someone convince me it’s a glitch, I’ve never wanted to be wrong so bad. And the fact that he met her before me, according to my snooping only a few months before he met me makes me think… like oh here’s this perfect girl and he couldn’t get her so he settled for me. OH GOD THIS IS SOUNDING TO REAL. I know sometimes my delusions can be out there but this is all sounding very possible. And it’s not like I can just ask him. He’s a joker and closed off, there’s absolutely no way I’d get a legitimate answer.
I’m stuck, literally hands tied. I want to starve myself until I’m pretty enough. Why? Because starving makes me feel like I’m in control. I’m desperate for control right now because I can’t control him. I can’t control this situation. I can’t control this jealousy. So I’m going to be better than her. Even if it fucking kills me. This is a game I refuse to lose
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blueicequeen19 · 2 years
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Are you currently talking requests?? I love your work and I was planning to write a fic where Rafe and Y/n are best friends having a small get together/bon fire on the beach with a couple of their friends (more his than hers) and somewhere throughout the booze they start playing truth or dare. It ends up that y/n and Rafe are dared to go skinny dipping in the ocean together and once they get out there they end up fucking and he's like huge on the dirty talk 🙈 lol idk the idea is all over the place and I royally fucked it up when I tried to write it. If you don't mind, just do with it what you can. Thank you!! ❤️
I hope you like this!!!! I was nervous writing it for you lol you’re like my idol! 💛💛💛
Night Swim
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“Come on, it’ll be fine. I’ve seen you naked plenty of times!” Rafe taunts as he shimmies out of his polo and swim shorts. It’s true. We’d been best friends since diapers but doesn’t mean I want to get naked with him now—and on the beach.
I swat his arm as he laughs but I reluctantly pull my sundress over my head, the alcohol in my blood giving me a little extra courage. Stupid people and their stupid party games. I could do this. It’s Rafe. He’s the last person I should be embarrassed with.
Rafe slips his boxers off and makes a mad dash for the water. I quickly take off my panties and bra to follow before he gets a chance to turn around and see my nakedness. Just as he’s waist deep in the warm water and turns, I dive under. It’s too dark to see, thank God, so I pop up close to where he was.
“Cheater.” Rafe says, moving towards me.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” I squeal as his arms wrap around me. I gasp when his erection presses against my leg. “Rafe.” I breathe, letting him pull me into his arms, our bodies pressed tightly together. I’ve never seen him look at me like this before.
“I have to confess something.” Rafe starts, cupping the back of my neck, his pupils blown to the point there’s no blue left in his eyes. “I told Topper to use that dare. It’s the only way I could think to break the ice. To get you like this.”
“Naked and alone?” I tease, wrapping my arms around his neck.
“And wet.” His voice seems to lower and the fire in my belly blazes like no other. I feel his hands slide down my back and he cups my ass, picking me up so I can wrap my legs around him.
“Rafe. Someone could see.” I whisper as his lips hover over mine.
“I don’t care. You’re mine. You’ve always been mine and I don’t care if everyone in the Outer Banks knows it.” His declaration sparks something inside me and I smash my lips to his, kissing him like he’ll disappear if I don’t. His hand disappears between us and I feel his dick at my entrance. I suck in a breath. I’ve never been with someone this size and I was a little intimidated.
“God, I can feel how wet you are for me.” Rafe groans, rubbing the head against my opening.
“Rafe, I don’t think—.”
“Shh, take a deep breath and relax. You have to let me in.” He kisses me as he works his way inside and I whine against his lips. The burn and stretch is like nothing I’ve ever experienced and I didn’t want it to stop.
“Fuck, you’re tight. Am I the biggest guy you’ve been with?” Rafe grits his teeth and I nod, pinching my eyes shut as he keeps working his way in. Holy shit. Rafe Cameron is inside me.
“I’m gonna wreck your poor pussy.” Rafe states. His dirty talk causing me to clench around him and he groans, fingers digging into my ass as he finally bottoms out.
“Is it in yet?” I blurt and he chuckles, kissing my neck as he rolls his hips.
“Does it feel in?”
“It’s so deep. So.. thick.” I pant, meeting his hips as I roll my own. I desperately needed to move too. “Fuck me, Rafe. Please.”
“Fuck, don’t do that. This will be over before I’ve even started.” Rafe grips my hips, helping me ride him and heat soars through my body. It’s the best thing I’ve ever felt. I’m so full. Rafe turns, putting his back to the beach to shield me from anyone view.
“Jesus, Rafe. You’re fucking me. I can’t believe this.” I rasp, kissing his lips over and over again even as he smiles.
“Does it feel good? Do you like having me inside you?” Rafe gasps when I roll my hips into him, feeling him even deeper than before.
“Yes. Oh, God, I’m close.” My head tips back as he helps bounce me harder, his teeth nibbling on my chin.
“Don’t cum yet. Wait for me.” Rafe pleads and I blink up at the stars as my body erupts with tingles from my spine down to my toes. I couldn’t hold off. It was too much. “Rafeeeeeeeee.” My body tightened around him, my arms around his neck were probably cutting off his air but I couldn’t stop. He seemed to swell inside me, causing a domino effect. I cried out just as he yelled like he was in pain, our bodies working with each other to chase the amazing feeling of our climax.
We slowed to a stop and I was still wrapped around him like a hug, trying to catch my breath as his hands caressed my back. I pulled back to look at him, watching the sweat drip down his brow, his swollen lips parted and so welcoming.
“Well, this changes things.”
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fussymeanie999 · 3 years
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first time - loki laufeyson x plus-size reader
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WARNING: this is going to be around 90% dirty smut. you have been warned. mentions of: cunnilingus, deepthroat, facefucking, unprotected sex, breeding, first time
synopsis: reader feels extremely insecure about her figure, loki finds her being absolutely destroyed, he decides to show her how beautiful she is.
a/n: also, i like used a scene from my mad fat diary for one of the dialogues (another one of my favourite shows), so all creds to them! i also used a monologue called "corsets and courtship" for some of loki's quotes by @tomhiddlestonsoundalike on tumblr so all credz to him and whoever wrote the text!
enjoy, my plussize queens (or whoever's reading this lol)
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you stood in front of your mirror, in your undergarments, looking at your own reflexion, your fingers grazing your own skin, cringing at every bump or texture you felt. your skin wasn't as soft as you'd want it to be. it wore many marks, wether from your skin stretching or plain old cellulite. you had some pimples, some scarring... you hated it. all of it. you just wished you were perfect. you weren't skinny, that was for sure. you weren't even mid-size. you were a big girl. and as much as you'd want to pretend you weren't, there were times where that was impossible. you didn't fit in any "regular sizes" and not every store had a plus-size section. you were afraid to eat in front of people. you couldn't even be intimate with your boyfriend.
ah. your boyfriend. your boyfriend's name was loki. and he was probably the most beautiful man you had ever laid eyes upon. well, not a man. technically he was an alien. or a god? he came from asgard. a different planet and it honestly baffled you that a literal god would go for someone like you, when he could get anyone he ever wanted. you couldn't believe what you were hearing when he revealed his feelings for you. of course you were hopelessly in love with him but you just couldn't believe he felt the same way. fat girls never get the hot guys. at least not in any story you ever heard, especially not in your life. you never had a boyfriend. no one had really shown any interest in you and you didn't either. mostly because you didn't think anyone would feel the same.  you didn't feel as though you deserved to be with anyone, you were too big, too unattractive, too insecure. so you never really tried. until loki came around.
he became part of your life almost a year ago to this day. he was your first kiss, first date, first everything. the only first that was missing was... your first time. yes. you were a virgin. a fat virgin at that. you didn't even let loki see you without a shirt on. the mere thought made you burst into tears, imagining different improbable scenarios where he'd be so disgusted by your figure he'd leave you. but you wanted to. you wanted him to see you and you wanted him to touch you. you wanted him in every sense of the term, but you couldn't bring yourself to reveal your body to him when the time came. he was always understanding, listening to your wishes and never made you feel like you had to do anything you didn't want to do. but you could feel how much it made him ache to not be able to be with you the ways he wanted to. it made you ache as well.
you grabbed at your fat, your jiggly rolls, covered in purple stripes and you couldn't help the tears that threatened to fall, roll down your cheek. your small cries suddenly became sobs, and they became louder and louder, as your brain was flooded with images of loki's face, disgusted in your figure. you let yourself fall onto the bed, feeling your stomach touch your thighs, making your sobs grow even louder. you held your stomach in one of your hands and and the other directed itself on your face, massaging your temple, feeling your heart beat inside your head.
you thought you were alone. you really did.
you heard the door of your bedroom creak. your head immediately jolted up as your glistening eyes met with familiar blue-ish green orbs. you grabbed the nearest blanket and covered your almost naked body, your sobs completely stopping but your tears still melted away on your round cheeks.
your raven-haired lover walked in the room, carefully.
"oh my sweet girl, what has happened?" the god said softly, carefully kneeling in front of you.
he slowly held out his hand to meet yours with confusion, worry and a hint of sadness in his eyes, but you quickly dodged it and got up, covering your entire front side with the blanket and quickly turning around so he couldn't see the back of you.
"nothing" you struggled to say, in between cries, still backing away from him.
you continued walking backwards until your lower back hit the dresser. you looked down, for a few quick seconds and when you looked back up, your lover was only a mere 2 inches away from your face. he cupped your visage with his hands and softly wiped your dried tears with the back of his thumb.
" you know how much i trust you my darling..." he started. " ... but this doesn't look like nothing."
he started slowly stroking your hair and brushing it with his fingers. you tried avoiding his stare but it was useless, as he was grabbing your face and lifted your chin up to make you look at him straight in the eyes.
as his stare felt as though it was piercing through your soul, you couldn't contain your cries anymore.
" be honest with me... i beg of you... it pains me to see you like this" he pleaded.
you started to contain your sobs a bit better, but you still felt so much pain.
" why... why are you with me loki...?" you were able to blurt out.
confusion. confusion was all that was written over his face. he also looked a bit hurt.
his stare started going around the room, trying to find an answer to your question. his hands, that previously were cupping your face, slid down to your throat and rested on your collarbone, his thumb drawing circles over your thyroid.
"what kind of question is that?" he said, annoyance in his voice. you were afraid you made him angry.
"loki... you can have anyone you want, alright? you're a god..." you said, tears still brimming the sides of your eyes.
loki looked at you with so much hurt, it was hard to keep eye contact.
" you're an 11, and i'm a two at best..." you proceeded. "most people, when they see us, out in public, or on social media, they must be thinking; "oh he must be absolutely mad going out with that..." you stopped yourself when you saw loki's facial expression go from hurt to raging.
"that what?" he asked firmly.
you didn't answer.
"THAT WHAT?" he screamed, making you jump.
he put a hand over his mouth, trying to calm himself down.
"how many times do i have to tell you, y/n?" he started. "you are my person. my woman. my everything. you are the most magnificent being my eyes ever laid upon. the most beautiful creature in all of the nine realms. can't you see? can't you? because i can. i see it everyday. i don't have to see you bare to know. never say that to me again, you understand? do you? do you understand?" he said, starting softly and becoming more firm.
his hands were still hanging by your collarbone, but you felt them grip at your skin, desperate for your understanding, for your touch, for you.
"... i" you started. "i d-do..." you stuttered through sniffles.
he looked at you directly in the eyes. you knew he loved you.
'but not enough.' you thought to yourself.
your love carefully placed his lips upon yours. his lips that you were familiar with. lips you kissed thousands of times. lips you loved. lips you longed for. you needed. the kiss he planted was one of the most delicate kisses he'd ever given you, but at the same time, one of the most passionate. it felt like all of the love he felt for you he poured out into you and in that moment, you felt like nothing could come between you two.
"p-please don't leave me, loki..." you cried out after the kiss.
"my love, my love, my love... never. i love you." he reassured you, stroking your hair.
he planted kisses all over your face, your cheeks, your nose, your forehead, your eyelids, and then back to your lips, this time with more hunger. it was like all of the times he had to restrain himself, when you felt like you weren't ready, completely melted into that kiss. all of his passion, his love, his hunger, his despair, and more importantly his lust, he finally let it all out and you let it all in.
"loki..." you panted in between kisses.
"mmh... yes my love?" he said, intensifying and deepening his kisses more and more.
you hesitated. but you knew. you knew you were ready.
"i-...mmh... i want you." you said, desperation tinting your voice, sounding almost like a plea.
loki slowed down. he took a minute to look at you in the eyes. he wasn't sure what to say. he wasn't even sure what you were saying.
"what?" was all he could muster up to say.
you looked at him with a little more confidence and nodded slowly.
the look on his face was priceless. he would finally be able to be with you.
"a-are you sure about this, love?" he said, sounding like he had just won the lottery.
you nodded again.
he grabbed the sides of your head firmly and leaned in to kiss you once more. his hands trailed down the sides of your body and started playing with the blanket that you were still holding firmly in your hands. you were scared to let go. to be completely bare to him.
"i'm afraid you're gonna have to let this go, my darling." he whispered in you ear, taking the chance to leave a wet kiss on your lobe, slightly biting down on it.
he grabbed your shaking hands in his, drawing circles with his thumb softly against yours.
"give yourself to me, little one... let me see you, touch you, feel you, taste you. i beg... i beg of you." he whispered again, pressing his forehead against yours.
you breathed heavily. you wanted him to see you. to touch you, feel you...
the wall you had built had always seemed so hard to knock down... but in this moment though, that wall seemed to be made of silk. all you had to do was let it go.
"okay..." you said, in the softest voice you ever spoke.
you backed away from loki and walked backwards a few feet. you were now standing the back of your knees faced towards the end of the bed. loki was staring at you proufoundly, awaiting your reveal impatiently.
your hands were trembling. you had nightmares about this moment. you had panic attacks for this moment. this moment was everything. but something about loki... was it the way he stood? the way he spoke? was it his stare? something about him made you feel safe. safer than you had ever felt before tonight.
so you let go.
you felt the blanket reach your toes. you cringed. so you closed your eyes, not wanting to witness loki's disappointment. you awaited any second now a hurl, a disgusted sound or a hurtful comment. but none of that.
you carefully opened your eyes, only to find loki with a gaping mouth, having the most amazing look on his face. a look of pure love, of endless attraction and mesmerising lust.
he approached you slowly, making each of his step count. when he finally reached you, he immediately pressed his forehead against yours. though your eyes were staring down at your feet, you could feel his stare devouring you.
he carefully placed his hand upon yours and let it trail up your arm. then back down again, giving you chills.
he didn't say anything. not a word. what was he thinking?
"i... i look disgusting i know, i'm so sorry. i know i disappoint..." you said, starting to regret the blanket had reached the floor.
you heard loki sigh so heavily.
"you... have got to be joking, love..." were the first words he spoke after seeing your figure. you heard the smile through his voice.
"in all of my..." he started. you heard him swallow before continuing. "in all of my 1056 years of living... never... and i mean never... have i ever witnessed such beauty before this night. my sweet, sweet girl, i simply do not understand why you felt the need to hide."
his hand reached your face and kissed you so passionately, you felt a sort of... heat at the bottom of your stomach. it was an unfamiliar feeling.
that same hand made its way to your neck, then to your shoulder and started playing with one of your bra straps. eventually, he completely took it off and did the same with the other strap.
"you have no idea what you are doing to me right now..." the god said, in a lower, hungrier voice.
"what am i doing to you?" you asked, innocently.
in between kisses, you could feel loki smirk against your lips.
his hand went from your shoulder, trailed down your arm and grabbed your hand in his. he took it and before you knew it he pressed it upon himself. his black, silky, suit pants were showing a bulge in between his legs and that's exactly where he put your hand.
he was hard.
when you first touched it, you heard a whimper come from your lover. god, he needed you.
"this... this is what you are doing to me, darling."
you couldn't believe the words he was saying to you. you felt as though you were in a sort of dream. loki wanted you. he was... quite literally hard for you.
loki grabbed your hair and pulled your head back so you were looking at him. his eyes went extremely dark.
"lay down. on the bed. now." he demanded firmly.
you obeyed his commands in the blink of an eye. you were ready.
you laid down on the bed, on your backside, carefully. when you got comfortable you looked up at loki and saw him looking at you, with hungrier eyes. eyes that were darker and more lustful than ever. he was devouring you with his eyes and he made sure to capture every square inch of skin of your body.
with only a smirk and the flick of a hand on your partner's part, your bra disappeared in a light green magic, leaving your breasts uncovered and nipples starting to harden.
loki obviously couldn't contain himself any longer and almost jumped on top of you, kissing you savagely, making his way down your neck, leaving all sorts of love marks, some darker than others. some of them were painful but the pain only reminded you that this was real. when he got to your breasts, you could almost see his mouth water.
he carefully grabbed one with his hand, keeping eye contact with you the whole time.
"so soft, so plump... for me. oh god, sweetheart you're giving me such a delight"
and with no warning he started giving you small licks, around your nipple, carefully approaching your most sensitive part, which he enthusiastically started to flick with his tongue. the sudden pleasure rose your voice as you let out a small whimper, begging for more.
"yes... yes my sweet girl... let it out... show me how much you want this" he said in a raspier voice.
you found your fingers playing with his raven-black locks, as his mouth played with your brown-ish pink buttons.
he did so for some while, until he felt your hand grasp at his vest. you wanted him to reveal himself to you as well. he got the message pretty quickly.
he looked up from his meal, giving you the same amount of eye contact, as he took off his black blazer, black tie and black vest. all he had on were his bottoms but you were too worried about his beautiful torso to notice. you let your hands wonder on his pale chest, feeling the softness of his skin, some of his hair, up to his pecs, you couldn't believe it. how can this man become even more beautiful?
"like the view, my love?" he asked. you enthusiastically nodded.
he bent down to leave more love bites over your torso and your breasts. he started to slowly go down your body leaving kisses under your breast, going even nearer to the most insecure part of your body. you cringed and whimpered again, but this time in a less of a pleasurable manner, remembering all of your stretch marks and cellulite, knowing he'll be disappointed.
"i... couldn't... be... more... in... love..." he breathed out between his wet kisses. he was now definitely directly on your tummy.
he looked up, knowing you wouldn't like this part. he met your eyes and definitely noticed your hesitation.
he got back up, towering over you. he bent back down, catching your lips in his.
he carefully started stroking your hair, in the most loving manner you could ever imagine. he looked at you straight in the eyes, seeming like he was trying to deliver a message directly to your soul.
"what have i done to deserve you?" he asked, his voice choking in between his words.
those words completely melted your aching heart.
it was your turn to touch him. you said nothing as you slowly stroked his cheek with the back of your hand, giving him your approval by a shake of the head.
he smiled and his head disappeared to your stomach again.
you could feel his hands rome around your entire body and his mouth leaving wet kisses over your stomach. his long raven hair still trailed around higher up on your torso, nearer to your breasts.
he finally got to the place his own body longed for the most.
at this point you were completely damp and you awaited his reaction to your wetness impatiently.
he quickly gave you one of the hungrier and most impatient look you'd ever seen him give you.
he got up in front of the bed, looking you up and down like a predator looks at its prey and with the flick of hand, yet again, loki made your panties disappear in a light shimmering green magic, leaving you completely bare. all that was covering you up were your legs, still pressed firmly together.
loki carefully placed his hands over your bare knees. he could feel you trembling. was it from excitement? nervousness? or desire?
"open up for me, my love... let me in" he said in a demanding, pleading voice.
you slowly started to comply and let your legs go loose. your lover took it upon himself and slowly spread your thighs apart. he couldn't believe his eyes.
he was letting himself finally see your aching core. he could see it glistening, it was calling to him, begging for his touch. he was the one the one responsible and he'd never felt prouder. he admired every fold, every forgotten hair you missed while shaving, everything about it was inviting.
"oh my sweet sweet girl... look at the state of you. don't you understand how long i've been waiting? to see you in this position, completely at my mercy, legs spread, only for me..."
he gulped and whimpered at the sight of you, as you spread you legs even further. he could feel the tightness in his pants become almost unbearable. he'd never been this aroused before in his entire life. but first, he needed a taste of you.
he slowly started leaving wet kisses over your thighs, getting closer and closer to your velvet folds. his hands traveled your entire body. your body, that felt as though it had been set on fire. he once again cupped one of your breasts and started flicking your nipples with his fingertips. you let yet another whimper escape your lips, needing him more than you've ever needed anyone.
you felt his hot breath against your wet love box and that was all it took to make you go insane.
"p-please..." you pleaded to the god.
he took your scent in, smelling the most mouth-watering aroma he ever got the chance to smell in all of his 1000 years.
"you don't have to ask me twice, my sweetness..." were his last words before delving in.
he placed his fingers upon your aching core, exploring all of your folds, he couldn't believe how wet you were.
"darling... you are dripping..."
he let his fingers trail for a few seconds, until they reached your entrance. he circled it with the tip of his finger as he finally placed his lips right on top of your sensitive button.
the sudden, unfamiliar sense of pleasure, completely took you by surprise as you yelped.
his tongue peaked through after a few kisses planted on your clitoris. it circled in the same motions his finger was making to your entrance. he was so soft, so cautious. but you could feel the heat in the bottom of your stomach growing darker, more demanding so you placed you hands on the top of your lover's head, brushing your fingers through his hair and slightly pushing his head down on your core.
loki got the message, as his circles became more passionate and as he started flicking his tongue aggressively at your core.
you felt your entire body tremble in desire as loki's finger plunged itself in between your folds, exploring your insides.
you were now moaning deliberately, wanting him to add digits. you thought you'd be more resistant, you thought it'd be a little painful, even but all you could feel was pleasure.
"more..." you pleaded.
as the words were still hanging from your lips, loki plunged yet another finger in, and this time, you did feel a little resistance but you didn't care. you wanted him. you wanted him so much.
his tongue was working wonders on your clit. you would think the man hadn't eaten in days at the sight of him. he was completely devouring you and you could feel the pleasure build up inside of you.
the mixture of his fingers pumping in and out of you, and his tongue flicking at your sensitive button, all of it was too much for you to handle. you felt something was coming.
"loki... l-loki... something... something's happening." you panted, in between moans.
he didn't stop. he knew what he was doing. he went harder, his tongue completely destroying you.
"i can feel it as well... your heat... your wetness... let yourself come undone, my sweet... for me" he whispered, panting, in between licks.
'come undone?' you thought. but before you knew it, you felt it. the highest peak of pleasure your body had ever felt in its life. you felt your thighs squeeze around the god's head, squashing him a little. you didn't want to hurt him but you couldn't contain yourself, as you screamed his name, not believing that amount of pleasure was even possible. it was electrifying. your whole body reacted, you were sweating. you put your hand over your mouth and bit down your finger to stop yourself from becoming a screaming mess, but it was already too late, as you rode your orgasm out to the last bit of pleasure you could conquer up.
"you taste even sweeter than i thought you would, sweet girl" he said, giving the nickname a whole different meaning.
you let out a huge sigh, slowly coming back to your senses. you looked up as loki got up from between your legs, his hand still caressing your folds slowly and placed a delicate kiss on your lips. you tasted what you thought was yourself. oddly enough, you didn't cringe, you hadn't found yourself to taste disgusting. it was... kind of erotic actually.
"loki i..." you started. you didn't know how to ask. "i want to..." you sighed out.
"say it, darling" he said, stroking your hair, still caressing in between your legs.
"i want to taste you... too" you finally let out.
you wanted to make him feel as good as he made you feel. you wanted to thank him in a way.
he was surprised. he didn't think you were ready.
"you made me feel so good today... i want to reciprocate the feeling... y'know..." you said, shyly.
loki's hand pulled at your hair to make you look at him.
"is that what you want?" he asked, firmly. he grabbed your hand and slowly pressed it yet again on his throbbing member, through his tightening pants.
he sighed heavily, still looking at you straight in the eyes.
you nodded, slowly. he smirked.
"then, get on your knees."
you obeyed.
you liked how he commanded you and guided you through all of your movements. you were nervous he wasn't going to enjoy, but the anticipated look on his face told you otherwise. also, the throbbing length in his pants.
you were now on your knees, on the floor, at the end of the bed and loki was sitting, his still clothed legs spread, inviting you in.
you started to slowly stroke his thigh, rubbing your hand up and down, each time getting closer to his private. you did the same thing with his other thigh, feeling the god getting impatient with your teasing.
you finally placed your hand over his member, giving it a small squeeze. you heard your lover grunt, at only your touch.
"you're eager" you stated, looking up at him. he gave you a smirk.
"less talking." he said, darkly.
you complied, massaging his bulge through his pants.
when you finally unzipped them, you heard your lover let out a sigh of relief. you wanted to bring them down to his ankles, but loki, being impatient, made them disappear in his green magic.
"hey. let me work." you said, in more of a joking way.
"i said... less talking" he repeated.
you noticed a small wet spot on his grey boxers. you bent down, without touching it, smelling it.
you felt the god squirm under you, eager to feel you around him.
you carefully, and slowly took his boxers down, letting his member spring free of its shackles, finally revealing itself to you.
he was huge. it was veiny, its tip was a dark pink, almost red, it was pale like the rest of his body. but most importantly, it was enormous.
"like the view, my love?" he asked for the second time that night.
you nodded your head enthusiastically. all you wanted was to get a taste.
you carefully approached your hand to the hot spot. the second your fingers reached his skin, loki whimpered. it was burning up, but it was so soft. you felt the veins under your fingertips, and suddenly it was like you knew exactly what to do. you carefully started stroking him and ran your thumb over the most sensitive part of his shaft, his frenulum, and heard him whimper once again.
"please" he pleaded, imitating your pleas from earlier.
"you don't have to tell me twice" you imitated as well.
you approched his tip to your lips and delicately gave him a soft kiss. his skin was so warm.
you continued giving him small pecks but you felt him get, yet again, impatient with your teasing.
"oh come on..." he pleaded.
you looked at him. sweat was dripping down his forehead.
you then flipped his cock over, back to his stomach to give yourself full access to the base of his member. you placed your tongue directly in between his balls and shaft and worked your way up to his tip, making sure you passed by his sensitive junction between his red bulb and the rest of his penis. directly after, you put his tip in your mouth and started bobbing your head back and forth, tasting the drops of pre-cum he deposited on your tongue.
you heard him moan, some cusses flew out of his mouth, he moaned mainly your name, or called you by all sorts of nicknames.
"oh my, oh my... you're doing so good... mmh... g-good girl..." he moaned out.
his words were able to bring back that heat at the bottom of your stomach. you slowly directed your hand in between your thighs and started stroking your own bundle of nerves. loki didn't seem to notice, too lost in the waves of pleasure you were giving him.
he was now moaning deliberately. he tried... he really tried, but he couldn't contain himself anymore, he grabbed your head, pulled you by your hair and pushed your head down to take more of his shaft. you awaited a gag or any sort of resistance on your part, really, but nothing came.
loki got up from where he was sitting, your head still enveloping his shaft and started moving back and forth, you being completely at his mercy. he was deliberately fucking your face, and you let him.
he moaned your name so many times you'd lost count. he became more and more agressive with each thrust until all of his shaft was buried down your throat. he held your head down for a few seconds, gripping at your hair, letting his cock sit in your mouth, until he finally pulled out, a strand of saliva escaping your lips. he was out of breath, but not as much as you.
"you feel so good, my love. you're doing amazing" he said, panting.
you gave him a few kitten licks, asking for more. he buried his cock again down your throat, pumping in and out. he was fucking your face as though it was a cunt, using your throat as a mere hole that was made to mold his shaft perfectly.
you weren't gagging which surprised you. you'd never tested your gag reflex, but obviously you didn't have any.
you felt him go faster and faster until he once again, suddenly stopped as your head was completely enveloping his shaft. but this time, he started grunting and moaning, louder, in more of an animalistic way, holding your head down, hard, as deep as he could go.
"i- i'm cumming, love" he grunted out.
suddenly, you could taste bitterness, saltiness explode in your mouth, and run down your throat. your first instinct was to spit it out, but your god kept your head in place, making you swallow. it felt never ending. he kept cumming and cumming. you thought the taste would repulse you, from what you had heard from friends and the internet, but you honestly didn't find it to be that disgusting.
he stayed in that same position, holding your head in place, for another ten to fifteen seconds after he came. you felt his cock twitch in your mouth and he finally removed himself.
you took a deep breath, considering you could finally breathe properly.
loki knelt down to your level. he looked at your face. fortunately, you weren't wearing makeup, so no makeup to ruin. your eyes were red, tears had run down your face, you had spit all over the sides of your face, and some of loki's cum had fallen out of the corners of your mouth. he wiped it with his thumb and took it up to your mouth.
you sucked his thumb dry, tasting him yet again.
he gave you a loving smile.
"mine." he simply said, in a soft manner.
he then kissed you in the most loving way he could, tasting himself on your lips.
he then backed away, looking you up and down, noticing your hand still wondering around in between your thighs. he smirked and locked eyes with you.
"i think we're gonna have to take care of that." he said, as he got up. he was now standing up while you were still on your knees. you noticed his cock was hard again, once it got to your eye level. how was that even possible? how could he be hard again this quick? you had to remind yourself he did have the stamina of a god. he handed you his hand for you to take, which you did.
he got you up and carefully placed his hands on the sides of your head and started stroking your hair.
"are you still sure you want to do this my love?" he asked.
you chuckled.
"after what we've done? i'm pretty sure there's no backing up now?"
he gave you a confused look.
"of course there is. i'm not gonna do anything you're not comfortable doing, sweetheart." he said.
you sighed at your poor choice of words.
"and i know that." you started. "but i'm ready. i want you... loki."
he smiled yet again. he didn't say a word. he just kissed you. it was a passionate kiss, like all of your others that night. his hands roamed around your body as if it was discovering it again for the first time.
taking you by surprise, he lifted you up, flipped you around and threw you on the bed. never had you been picked up before. you always thought you'd break the person's spine. but loki lifted you up so easily, you felt like a feather.
"you're mine" the god grunted, as he plunged on top of you. he spread your legs open, as far as he could and positioned himself right between them.
he reached down to your bundle of nerves and drew circles with his fingers like he did earlier. he wound up plunging his fingers inside you yet again, prepping you for what was about to replace them. you could feel his length harden even more against your thigh, as he did so.
you started whimpering, wanting more than just his digits to fill you.
your whimpers were like music to loki's ears. he loved hearing how much you longed for him. he loved seeing you squirm under him. he enjoyed feeling all powerful, having that much control over you.
"take me" you sighed out, looking at your lover straight in the eyes. you couldn't hold it in anymore. you needed him. you needed him inside you. now.
he smirked as he bent down, to leave a soft kiss on your forehead.
"tell me when you want to stop, my darling. use your words." he asked of you.
you nodded, agreeing to his words, whilst trying to spread your legs even further.
his fingers left your core, leaving you needy and wanting to feel him once more, but they were quickly replaced by what you knew was his tip. he started slowly moving back in forth in between your folds, teasing at your entrance.
he gave you a look, pleading for approval.
you slowly nodded, ready to take him in.
you felt his his bulb starting to peak inside of you. you winced, feeling a slight resistance.
he stopped. but you nodded again, asking for him to continue.
as he buried his shaft deeper in you, it started to really hurt. for real this time.
"ow, ow. stop." you asked. "but stay inside. just stay... stay like this. let me- let me adjust."
he listened to you.
"are you okay, my love?" he asked, still halfway inside of you.
you nodded again, breathing heavily. you knew you could do it. you wanted to.
"p-... proceed." you said.
he listened to you again, burying himself entirely in you. he let out a loud grunt. your walls had adjusted to the size of his member and it felt less painful.
your lover moaned again.
"you.. are so tight, oh my. you feel so good." he panted.
you smiled. you loved seeing him in this much pleasure. you loved the passionate, lustful look on his face, all of it was for you.
he started moving back and forth, slowly, being really careful of each and every one of your movements, analyzing if you wanted to continue or not.
the first few thrusts were painful but eventually the pain left and absolute ecstasy took its place.
loki noticed the change in you and decided to give his thrusts more power, barely able to contain himself. he pumped in and out of your aching core at a medium rate. he wanted to go faster, harder but he stayed careful.
but you... you wanted more. you started clawing at loki's back, bringing him closer to you and leaving red scratches all over his back. you kissed his neck, his torso, leaving him the same bruises he left you earlier, though yours weren't as agressive as his. yours were small, red, but his eventually became huge purple bruises. and you had them all over your body. he started leaving you some more, on your neck, your collarbone, imitating your movements.
"more..." you pleaded.
he smirked against your skin, left you yet another passionate kiss on your lips and with that, his thrusts became harder, more agressive, much faster. you felt as if he was trying to crawl inside of you.
you both started moaning and screaming each other's names at the top of your lungs. your lover got up, detaching his torso from yours, trying to find an angle where he could go deeper inside of you. you wanted him back, missing the heat of his body. you reached out to him with your arm, but he firmly grabbed it, stopping you in your tracks. you were surprised. he looked down at you, staring at you straight in the eyes. his eyes went dark. his hand that had stopped your movement, trailed up from your hand, to you elbow and up your arm, until it reached the crook between your shoulder and your neck. his thumb drew circles over your cheek, then your chin and finally on your throat. you didn't even have the time to realise but his hand had completely wrapped itself around your throat, choking you slightly. you could still breathe completely fine, but his hand held your head in space, as his thrusts became even harder, if that was even possible.
he started panting, completely losing himself in the moment.
he bent down again, still holding your throat in his hand. he grabbed you and forced your face to be centimetres from his.
"mine." he said in a deep, grunting voice.
that word was the one that completely sent you over the edge. you could feel your walls clench around his member, your were close. you needed your release.
"loki... i'm close." you tried sighing out.
he understood you perfectly. the hand he wasn't using to choke you found its way down between your legs and started playing agressively at your clit.
"let go, baby... let go" he panted.
you couldn't hold it in anymore. you let your orgasm take control of your entire body. your legs were shaking, your hips started grinding against loki's, your hands scratched at his back even deeper, your eyes were rolling back inside your head, and your mouth gaped wide open, letting all sorts of cusses fly out of your mouth.
as you rode out your orgasm, you knew loki was close as well. seeing you in this intense state, all because of him, sent him over the edge and he knew he couldn't hold on much longer.
you started grinding your hips even more agressively, trying to meet his.
"come on, baby..." you whispered in his ear, leaving all sorts of wet kisses and hickey's all over his body.
you ran your finger through his curls, pulling at his hair.
and that's when you knew. you felt his hand grasped at your throat even tighter, making you gasp for air. he stopped moving, buried deep inside of you.
"oh my fu..." he started, moaning loudly.
you had made some research about how it would be like to have someone cum inside of you. you found out most people couldn't feel it. but you did. you felt all of it. you felt a warmth completely invade your insides, it kept coming and coming, just like earlier but this time inside of you.
loki's hand was still wrapped around your throat, holding it firmly, but as his orgasm ended, he eventually loosened his grasp.
when he finally stopped coming, as he was still buried inside you, he finally looked up at you and left a wet kiss your lips.
"i love you" he said, out of breath.
"i love you too."
loki looked down and smirked, taking his hand off your throat.
"no... don't say it like that... don't say "too"... it sounds like you're just agreeing with me. say it for real..."
you scoffed a little, thinking his request to be a little ridiculous. but you understood. you ran your fingers through his raven locks, held his head between both your hands, making him look at you.
"i love you, loki... i love you." you said softly, staring into his ocean blue eyes.
he gave you a wide smile and kissed you once more. he gave you a kiss full of love and passion.
after your kiss, he slowly pulled out of you. you felt so full, a second ago, the absence of his shaft between your legs contrasted so much with the empiness you now felt.
loki bent down again between your thighs to watch his seed run out of you. it felt yet again, never ending, but loki watched attentively.
"what a beautiful sight... may i snap a picture?" he said, jokingly.
"shut up..." you said in the same tone.
he gave you one last lick to your core and licked his lips, not minding his cum, plastered over your folds.
"i'll get a towel..." he said, leaving one last peck on your lips.
"thank you, honey..." you thanked him softly.
as you layed, completely naked on your bed, you thought.
you no longer felt restrained in your own skin, not around him at least. he made you feel seen, loved, desirable. you hated your body a little bit less, now. you might even try eating in front of people! maybe... you and loki didn't just have sex that night. you made love. he didn't just take your virginity, he made you into a better, improved version of yourself.
you were never more in love with him than in that moment.
loki came back with a light pink towel. he rose your hips up in the air and deposited it under you. he used the other end of the towel to wipe his seed off you.
once you were clean, loki got back off the bed and put the towel back in the bathroom.
he joined you in bed and wrapped his arms around you.
you felt so good. better than you had in years. with him. you felt so loved.
you didn't want to move, but you remembered you had to pee after a sexual intercourse... you read it in a blog.
you nudged loki, trying to get off the bed, but loki held you back, making it impossible for you to move.
"don't... even think about it." he said firmly under his breath.
you chuckled.
"i'm gonna get a urinary tract infection... and it's gonna be on you." you said in an accusing manner.
"darling, i'm a god... i have super powers, you're not gonna get a... whatever sort of infection you're talking about."
you scoffed, nuzzling your nose in the crook of his neck, sighing heavily.
loki left a loving kiss on the top of your head and held you tighter.
"you're mine... all mine."
+++
word count: 7395.... comment if you liked it loveys!! what was your favourite part?
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alyxovert · 2 years
Text
⊱┊dialogue : twdg - season 1
alamort (adj.) • half dead of exhaustion
change names/pronouns/tense as needed!
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a new day
“regardless, could be you just married the wrong woman.”
“it goes to show, people will up and go mad when they believe their life is over.”
“well, do what you think you should.”
“frankly, i think it’s because he’s dumb as a bag of hammers… but he makes up for it with enthusiasm.”
“you two actually look relaxed.”
“people don’t want to die ignorant, i guess.”
“but at least you have the common sense to listen to a man giving you advice.”
“sorry? your son is alive. you don’t get to be sorry!”
“you’re gonna whoop me? you and what homo parade?”
“maybe you’re a murderer, but i don’t really care.”
“why don’t you want to talk about your family? do they like… hate you?”
“…you have a boyfriend?”
“there’s no happy ending to this.”
“you’re a good man.”
“god bless you.”
“i’m not letting somebody else get eaten today… especially not a good friend.”
“you like my daughter?” “her dad tried to kill me so…”
starved for help
“he was never going to survive.”
“god help us.”
“go ahead and run! we ain’t goin’ nowhere.”
“jesus… there’s a kid mixed up in this?” “was, more like.”
“you’re not men, you’re monsters. all men are monsters.”
“take a can of beans, take a little girl. it’s all the fucking same to you.”
“i’m putting this arrow right through your BALLS.”
“jesus, man! i’m from florida! crazy shit just comes out of my mouth sometimes… sorry.”
“it’s always something with this guy.”
“you’re all sick… sick in the head!”
“what the fuck… the fucking… what fuck?!”
“i’ll kill you!”
“you’re not worth to energy to hate.”
“you’re already tainted.”
“who the fuck do you people think you are?!”
“it’s over!”
“they’re not coming.”
long road ahead
“we just lost everything.”
“get the fuck over it.”
“i’ll die out here!” “i don’t care.”
“i don’t have anything left.”
“dead get ‘em?” “no.” “ah, livin’ got ‘em.”
“he’s out of time.”
“wake the fuck up, man.”
“how the fuck do you calm down after a day like today?”
“you’ll fucking lose everything acting like this!”
“what a mess.”
“i could kill you!”
“i had to tell someone…”
“that’s what everybody says.”
“oh, so he gets to swear.”
“god, you’re a real son of a bitch, aren’t you?”
around every corner
“confidence is earned, ben.”
“we are fucked!”
“if now ain’t the time for a drink…”
“i’m not leaving you with ben, i’m leaving him with you.”
“have you lost your motherfucking mind?”
“he ain’t shit now.”
“i don’t owe you anything.”
“are we really gonna do this now?”
“this is all i have left of her.”
“shut the fuck up.”
“you little pissant! you’re fucking dead! you hear me? DEAD!”
“my wife?! and child?! YOU GOT THEM BOTH FUCKING KILLED!”
“you can whoop his skinny little ass later!”
“you know she thinks the world of you.”
“she’s my family now. she’s all i got.”
no time left
“please don’t hurt her.”
“you’re fucking dead! i don’t know who you are but i will kill you, do you understand?!”
“if i don’t live through this—”
“we thought maybe we lost you…”
“you lost some blood.”
“i think i just peed myself.”
“why the hell are we letting the one-armed guy do all the high risk maneuvers?” “cause the one-armed guy insists. now shut up about it.”
“i’m fucked.”
“i lived through it; which is a start.”
“this is not happening…”
“everything is so fucked…”
“stop pushing me around and stop wishing i was dead!”
“give me a fucking break!”
“kill anything that gets in.” “you know you’re talking to ME, right?”
“i’m sorry, okay? fuck, we can’t do this!”
“then kill me, you son of a bitch, okay?! don’t even fucking hesitate!”
“is this really possible?”
“i’m sorry.”
“i wasn’t going to hurt you.”
“judging by the decor of this room, i’d guess they were pbs watchers.”
“i could’ve done more.”
“i could’ve been a better husband… a better father… could’ve been a better friend.”
“me and my fuckin’ mouth…”
“it’s just something i gotta do. you know that.”
“have you ever hurt somebody you care about?”
“do i look like a monster to you?” “we all do.”
“i hate seeing you like this.”
“i just miss your smile, honey.”
“i thought you were gone.”
“they’re dead… they really are…”
“i’ll miss you.”
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i know this game is ten years old but i just completed all of it for the first time a few days ago so… this is my way of celebrating. this is also my way of coping.
also, the game is over nine hours long, i just knew i could get hella dialogue starters from it… which i did! instead of my usual 25-30 starters, this has close to (if not over) 90!
the funniest part? considering i’m taking these word for word from the game and not thinking of these myself, you’d expect this to have taken a few minutes. this took me 6 hours. today was supposed to be my lazy day but woah.
[requests : temporarily closed]
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ezgithechaotic · 3 years
Text
pushing up the dasies . peter parker
pairing: Peter Parker x Reader, Peter Parker x female reader
summary: Someone has been stealing Y\N's flowers, and she is determined to find who it is.
warnings: she\ her pronouns (don't know if this one's a warning), mention of the death of a loved person, graveyard
author note: I’m sorry in advance if I have any fault. English is not my first language. But please let me know if you see anthing that doesn’t seem right. I really have no idea if this is good or trash. I’m getting mixed signs. So, please leave a comment about what you think, love you.
As a comic book nerd, I personally love both Andrew and Tom's Spiderman. Just thought this story fit Andrew's more, but feel free to imagine Peter as your favorite! 
masterlist 
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The first time you realized a few flowers were picked from your garden, you didn't think much into it. The kids around the neighborhood liked to play hide and seek around your garden. You thought; it should be Thompson's girl, she likes flowers. It wasn't something that never happened before. You would simply plant new ones, it was no big deal, you could never get angry at children. But after some time, you started to realize the pattern. Every month on the same day, you found a handful of your daisies gone upon returning from your part-time job. Mrs. Thompson swore her daughter would never do such a thing without asking, and after the third time, you were sure somebody was stealing your flowers. Maybe it was that gruff man across the street that never got along with people. But you had a feeling if he had to do anything with your flowers, it would only be blowing them up. 
Peter always wondered whom the pretty flowers and house belong to. The post box just outside the garden said Y\L\N, and he had always imagined an old sweet woman lived in the white-painted house with a green door. And Peter hoped he didn't make the poor woman too sad with missing flowers. Boy, was he wrong. You weren't old, and you were furious and determined to find the person who stole your beautiful daisies. 
Your friends always wondered why you liked living in such an old neighborhood. The house was one of the few things your mother left you after she died, along with the considerable amount of money in your bank account. You could always sell the house, find an apartment downtown, so you can be closer to school that's what your friends told you every time you had them over. But you loved the house. You loved that the house held so many memories of your childhood, especially your garden. Even though your mother was a busy woman, she had always made time for you and her flowers. At the age of six, growing flowers with your mother quickly became one of your favorite pastimes. That week you did what everyone would do, changed your shift with Mary Jane to catch the flower thief. 
So, no, selling the house or letting strangers steal your lovely flowers was not one of the many choices. 
Now, Peter Parker was many things, but not a thief. Well, it depended on what you would call stealing. Surely picking a few flowers from a random garden couldn't count as stealing. And God knows he wouldn't do it if he weren't penniless. Trying to survive college and paying for an apartment didn't leave him much. The money The Daily Bugle paid was shit. He had been selling photos for the damn newspaper since high school, but it was no use, Peter had to find a job that paid more than The Daily Bugle. And there was no way he was going to ask Aunt May for money, even though she would be happy to give him some. But that was another day's concern, for now, the only thing he needed to do was be quick. Because he knew if you found out that it was him who was stealing, sorry picking, your flowers he sure wouldn't be able to swing away this time. 
Peter honestly felt guilty about your flowers, they were lovely. And he knew this was a safe neighborhood, so he had no way of paying you back with saving you. He had been visiting Gwen every month since her death. It was one of the few things he could keep up with after he graduated high school. Daisies were Gwen's favorite. Peter knew he could easily find another place to pick the flowers, but he believed that there was something magical about the garden. He felt so much love around the house. Maybe it was a silly thing, but Peter thought Gwen would have loved that garden. 
Y\N had been sitting on her porch, hiding behind the dark blue armchair, actually too anxious to face the flower thief. You felt childish after some time. It was just a few daisies, right? There was no need to act like a crazy woman. As you were getting ready to go back inside, you saw him. He had an average height, brown messy hair. He was wearing a black t-shirt and an unbuttoned baby blue shirt with a greenish-brown jacket. Y\N's anger turned back the minute she saw him touch the flowers. 
"You, flower thief!" 
A moment before, Peter felt like his whole body was on edge as if bells were ringing in his brain. But he was already late to realize she had been waiting for him and there was no way to run, he wasn't wearing his suit. Where were the damn spider-senses when he needed them the most? So, he just stood there, speechless, his hand hanged above the daisies. She was pretty, as pretty as the flowers before him. Guilt heating his face, Peter couldn't help but stare at you with his eyes wide open like a dumbstruck idiot. He felt like his lunch was climbing its way back up. 
You were now, standing few steps away from him. "You've been stealing my flowers for months!" 
Peter held his hands up in defense. "Look, I can explain." 
Y\N put her hands on her hips, one eyebrow raised, waiting for an explanation. Your heart beating like crazy. Even though it was still bright and you were in the middle of a road, he was a man. A man taller and despite looking skinny, stronger than you. But you hold your face as still as you could.  
"Go on then." 
Peter couldn't find the words to explain. What was he going to say? Sorry, I thought my dead girlfriend would love your flowers so, I've been stealing them, I hope you don't try to kill me. No fucking way. His mouth opened and closed few times, making you sigh. You realized the boy wasn't going to give you any answer. He was probably taking them to his girlfriend or boyfriend. 
"Are they pretty?" you asked, dropping your hands. Peter, very confused, kept on staring at her. You rolled your eyes at how silly he was. "The person you're taking my flowers to." Something at the back of your mind hoped he would say they were for his mother. Now that you were closer you could see the sweet hazel color of his eyes. 
"Um-" His hand went up, scratching his neck. "She is." 
She was.
He shuffled through his pants pockets. "I have a photo-" 
"No." You stopped him. "I want to see if she is pretty enough for my daisies." 
"What?" Peter tried to grasp his head around the idea. 
"I want to see her and tell her that her boyfriend is a thief. C'mon." 
"I don't think-"  Peter was getting anxious, now. How was he supposed to tell you that her girlfriend was dead? 
"Of course you don't think." You started walking. "C'mon, now. Take the flowers." 
Peter didn't know what to do so he went with it. What could go wrong, right? 
"I'm sorry," Peter said after some time. "I have no excuse for what I did." 
His head hung low, watching his steps as he walked. He knew he would stutter if he looked at your face. Peter had a habit of getting tongue-tied around pretty girls. And, well, you were the prettiest girl he had ever seen. Mind you, he wasn't even thinking about Gwen anymore, which made him feel kinda guilty. 
"It's okay." You had your hands in the pockets of your jacket. "My life's been boring lately. You were the only exciting thing, I guess." 
"I'm sure you have more exciting things than me." Peter still didn't look at you but you could see him smiling.
"It's Y\N, by the way." You kept your eyes on him. "If you wanted to know the name of a woman you constantly robbed."
He laughed. "Peter, Peter Parker." His eyes finally met yours. It was ridiculous, how easy it was to just look at his face and feel safe even though he was a stranger. His smile grew even more. It was almost contagious, his smile. He had something about him that made you wanted to scream and purr like a cat at the same time. You felt yourself getting overwhelmed, he was making you weak at the knees. So, you pulled your eyes away from him. 
Pull yourself together, woman! He has a girlfriend.
You were too distracted to realize where was Peter taking you until you arrived. It was the same route you took whenever you felt like talking to your mother. Peter and you were standing just outside of the graveyard. Your head whipped around, turning to Peter. He had a soft smile on his face. 
"Peter, I-" 
"It's okay." 
"No, It's not okay." You took a deep breath, pressing your palms into your eyes. "I'm such a dick." 
"No, you were just mad at me." 
You slouched your shoulder, didn't know what to say. What would even one say in this situation?
"C'mon." Peter's warm hand was gently holding your arm, now. "Let's go see her." 
You didn't talk until you arrived at the tombstone. Peter put the flowers in front of it. 
"Daisies were her favorite." He had a sweet look on his face, he put his hands back into his pockets. 
"They were my mother's favorite, too." You murmured, but Peter could hear you perfectly. "I think that's why I overreacted you picking the flowers. I wasn't thinking." 
"Oh, It's not stealing anymore, then?" He teased. "It's okay, honestly. She would've liked you. You have that fire in you like you could make the world better just with a gesture of your hand. She liked that kind of people, that can light the room with their smile." 
"I think I would've liked her, too." You said, your eyes on the tombstone.
Gwen Stacy. 
Her name was familiar to you. You didn't know where, but you were sure you had heard before. Still, you didn't ask Peter anything, assumed he wouldn't be comfortable talking about it. You didn't say anything until you were out of the graveyard. You knew you would come back tomorrow to see your mother, but with Gwen on your mind. 
The more you looked at his face the more you could see him. Peter wore his heart on his sleeve, he was easy to read. "You blame yourself." You said, nodding your head slowly. You smiled after seeing the face he made. "It's okay, I know the feeling." 
"Your mother?"
"Yeah." 
Neither of you talked for a long time. Peter could tell you weren't ready to talk about it. He knew it wasn't easy to open up, especially to a stranger. It'd been years since he talked about Gwen, so, he knew the feeling, too. 
You felt your phone buzz in your pocket. It was a message from Mary Jane.  "Just arrived home, you owe me." 
"That's it!" You exclaimed, remembering your talk with Mary Jane. "That's how I knew her name!" 
Peter, looking very confused, asked you. "What?" 
"Gwen, her name was very familiar." Pocketing your phone again. "I have a friend, Mary Jane, who went to the same high school with Gwen. I've seen her in the yearbook. That's where I recognized her name." 
"You know MJ?"
"Oh, yeah," you laughed. "We met in Brooklyn, probably four years ago. I think it was very late, some guy was trying to get her number even though she said no, like five times. And I hadn't had the best day of my life. So, I punched the guy and told him to leave her alone. We have been friends ever since."
Peter was amazed. He didn't know how much cooler you could get. 
"You know her, too?" 
"Yeah, We've been friends for a long time. My aunt kinda tried to set us up."  
You laughed. Peter and Mary Jane seemed like two opposite characters. You would never imagine them together. But again, maybe Peter's pretty face was affecting your judgment. You didn't know. He made your mind foggy. At last, you found yourselves at your front yard again. Your eyes wandered over the empty spots that daisies left. 
"Would you like to get a coffee sometime?" Peter was leaning against white fences that surrounded your garden. He had that sweet smile on his face again. "So I can pay you back for daisies."
You bit your lips to stop yourself from smiling so much. "Gwen was pretty enough for them. You can have some once a month when I'm not looking." Peter was feeling like you were about to turn him down. Both of you knew this wasn't really about the damn flowers. But again, Peter was every so often wrong about these kinds of things. "But you know, maybe not Saturdays. I'm usually free for a cup of coffee on Saturdays." Peter was ready to feed himself with only pasta for a week if it meant he would get to see you again. 
You could visibly see Peter's eyes liting up. "Just one cup?" 
You shrugged. "Tea is fine, too." 
"I didn't know MJ had friends like you." He said, intensely watching your every move. 
"Like me?" You were so sure something bad was coming, he was simply too good to be true.
"You know, this beautiful. If I had known, I would have visited her more."
"Wow, you are hiding a monster under that pretty face, don't you?"  
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miss-smutty · 3 years
Text
A/N - I've literally been gone for months 😱😭 I've been so busy with my business I lost my writing mojo again. I'm sorry @swaggysposts you've waited so long for your request but here it is, I hope you like it.
Request- "How about Thor x reader wedding night....Having a wedding in the Avengers Facility with the Avengers.....And Tony letting them use his Malibu home for their wedding night....
The reader is a virgin and nervous about the whole sex thing.....Thor feels her nervousness.... Thor eases her nervousness by playing and dancing around in the Malibu Mansion and they do tequila body shots between each other and they have skinny dipping in the pool And they both get turned on and they have a intimate first time by Thor's sweet gesture 😍😍
Word count- 4,651 (sorry it's so long 🙊)
Warnings- Swearing, smut, unprotected sex
Taglist-: @innerpaperexpertcloud @pandaxnienke @chickensarentcheap
Posted: 29th April 2021
18+ only!!
Blushing Bride
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"3… 2… 1!" Everyone in the room shouted gleefully.  You reached down and threw your beautiful sunflower bouquet back into the crowd. Turning around to watch where it lands, smiling from ear to ear as you watch your girlfriends scramble to catch the falling flowers.
Nat clambers over people unapologetically, elbowing your cousin in the face as she reaches into the air and catches the bouquet with one hand. There's cheers as she arrogantly side-eyes the other girls shamelessly, you notice as she catches Bucky's eye from across the room, confirming the suspicions you've had for a while. Hopefully you'll get chance to question her about that later on.
You scan the room until your eyes lay on the person you were looking for - your handsome husband.
Thor can't take his eyes off of you, his beautiful bride, you blush under his stare and laugh when you realise the cliche of now being his beautiful blushing bride.
You've never seen him in a suit before and he looks completely ravishing, his broad frame filling out the navy blue, fitted suit, impeccably. He's talking to Tony and Pepper and by the way they all keep looking over at you, you realise you're the subject of their conversation.
"So, you're finally Queen Odinson" Tony greets you as you make your way over to join them, hitching up the long train of your dress. You feel like a queen in your exquisite wedding gown, the way it drapes on your curves perfectly. It's a little difficult to walk in especially with how clumsy you are but it makes you feel amazing.
"Wow, it feels so strange when you say that." You smile widely, reaching up on your tiptoes to kiss Thor's cheek.
"You've always been my Queen." His grin is equally as wide as yours as he wraps his arm around you, gazing down at you proudly.
"Don't mind us" Tony says sarcastically, rolling his eyes and then laughing when Pepper playfully hits his arm.
"Oh don't worry, we won't. I've been waiting for this day since… Forever" 
"I know, Thor what took you so long?" Tony jokes.
"I have wanted to make Y/N my Queen since the first moment I set eyes on her" Thor says seriously, Tony's rhetorical joke going straight over his head. 
"Yeah, we get it Point Break. Now I have a wedding gift for you both." 
"Ohh yes, you're going to love it" Pepper adds excitedly, clapping her hands together enthusiastically.
"We want to invite you to spend your honeymoon in our Malibu mansion, so what d'ya think?" Tony asks.
"Oh my god! No way! We'd love to." You exclaim, looking at Thor for his approval and squeeling excitedly when he nods in agreement.
"Good, now you better go mingle. I can see your mom shooting me daggers for hogging you both for too long" he smiled warmly. You reach up to kiss his cheek and wrap your arms around pepper tightly.
"Thank you so much you two, you're the best" you say excitedly.
"Yes we are and don't forget it" Tony laughs.
Thor takes your hand in his and leads you to the dancefloor to join your friends. As he wraps his arms around your waist he leans down to whisper in your ear.
"You look radiant, my love. I can't wait until we're alone" He says sincerely.
You feel a tightness in your throat at his words and quickly try to swallow it away, gulping nervously. You were a virgin and the thought of Thor having literally hundreds of years more experience than you, terrifies the life out of you. 
"Your brother looks like he's having a good time" you say sarcastically, changing the subject strategically when you spot Loki over Thor's shoulder. Of course he didn't look happy at all, stood in the corner on his own with a face like thunder.
Thor spins you around so he can see for himself, a smile tickling the corner of his mouth when he realises you were joking.
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"You know Loki, he can't stand anybody else being happy. Especially me. This must be torture for him" He laughs, the smile on his face crinkling the corners of his eyes as he gazes down at you. Your own cheeks aching from the smile that hasn't left your face for the whole day.
"Are you sad that the rest of your family and friends aren't here?" You ask, resting your head on his chest and feeling his heart beating.
"Of course not, my love. We will see them soon." he smooths his hand down the back of your head.
Thor had promised to give you your perfect wedding, everything you'd ever dreamed of and then later you would go to Asgard and have a traditional Asgardian ceremony too. The thought of it made you extremely nervous, you had no idea what to expect but imagined you would be surrounded by beautiful Gods and Goddesses and the idea of it made your stomach sink.
You danced the night away with your friends and Thor until your feet could no longer hold you up and you collapsed, exhausted into Thor's arms.
"I think it's time to get you home, my love" Thor whispers into your ear.
"I don't want it to end yet" you whine, clasping your hand to your mouth to stifle a yawn. The tiredness suddenly washing over you all at once.
"Don't worry, the night has only just begun" Thor said his eyes glistening with excitement. Butterflies flutter in your stomach with anticipation, nerves and excitement mixing together until you didn't quite know which was the most dominant feeling. 
                        *********************
You can't contain your excitement as you finally see  Tony's mansion set upon the cliffside, over-looking Malibu beach. The futuristic looking building with the glass walls is absolutely breathtaking, definitely everything you imagined Tony's house to be.
As you step inside the house the first thing you notice is how open and clean everything is. The glass wall runs the entire length of the room, it's like you could practically walk out into the sea.
"Welcome to your honeymoon home, Mr and Mrs Odinson. I am J.A.R.V.I.S and I am here to assist you with anything you may need during your stay." J.A.R.V.I.S says through the integrated speakers. 
"Oh my god!" You squeel.
"Who said that?" Thor asks looking around the room, confused. The look on his face is comedic but you stop yourself from laughing to save Thor from embarrassment.
"It's J.A.R.V.I.S" You answer shrugging your shoulders nonchalantly.
"But who is Jarvis? Are we not alone?" Thor asks, eyes wide, still scanning the room for an unseen person.
You giggle at Thors innocence. "I think it's one of Tony's intelligent system thingies, am I right J.A.R.V.I.S?" You laugh when Thor looks at you like you're mad.
"You are right Mrs Odinson, I am Just A Rather Very Intelligent System but you may call me J.A.R.V.I.S. Is there anything else I can help you with?" 
"Not right now, thank you J.A.R.V.I.S" 
"I don't like the thought of somebody watching us, especially on our wedding night" Thor gets that glint in his eyes again.
"He's a computer babe, I think we're safe." You chuckle light heartedly, gliding along the smooth marble floor to stand in front of the enormous window.
"Wow! I bet that view is beautiful in the daylight." You say, changing the subject. 
"Not even half as beautiful as you" Thor says as he comes up behind you and pushes your hair to one side so he can press his lips softly to your neck. Your hairs stand on end as he sends shivers through your entire body. You feel electrically charged by his touch, your body tingling with energy.
Thor feels your body go ridgid against him, he can sense your nervousness and does his best to calm you.
"Are you ok, my love?" He whispers softly as he strokes the goosebumps that have appeared on your arms.
You turn around to face him, placing your hands on his chest to reassure him but avoiding those piercing blue eyes.
"I'm ok." You lie.
"You are not ok, please tell me your worries" he lifts your face to look at him and you cave when you see that gentle, pressing look on his face.
"Fine." You sigh "This is my first time, but you… You've been with hundreds. No, probably thousands of women. How could I not be worried?"
"They will never compare to you" He smiles genuinely. You're not going to lie, the thought of him with even one other woman makes you feel slightly sick.
"You don't know that." Looking away again, unable to concentrate when you look into his deep blue eyes.
You didn't want to believe that he was being sincere, how could he be? Thousands of women, there's absolutely no way you could even slightly compare. Thinking about it was making you even more nervous, you had experience with other sexual things but you were still a virgin. Growing up with religious parents that had drilled it into you that you mustn't have sex until you were married. You knew it was possibly all bullshit, just another thing made up to control women but still there's always a chance it wasn't and you didn't want to take the risk of spending your afterlife in hell. So you'd been a good little girl and restrained yourself through the absolute torment of college and the multiple boyfriend's who had never been able to last longer than a couple of months before they dumped you or cheated on you. Then you met Thor, he was different to anyone you'd ever met and not just the fact he was an actual god - but he was a gentleman.
"I do because I have never loved anyone the way I love you." You look up at him slowly, smiling shyly when you catch his eye. The things he said definitely helped ease your mind a little.
"Just don't worry about it, ok my love? We'll take things slow." He adds, kissing your forehead.
"Ok… Now can we try and find some alcohol to loosen up a little?" 
"Do you not think you've had enough?" He asks, cocking his head to the side to examine your level of drunkenness.
"I think my nerves have sobered me up." You pout playfully, looking up at him through your lashes.
"Well then what are you waiting for? Let's find this alcohol." He grabs your hand and hurries through the room, dragging you along, laughing behind him. You have to run to keep up to him, his long legs making him much faster than you. 
"Oh my god, Thor. You almost pulled my arm out." You laugh stopping to catch your breath, the house so big that it took a lot longer than expected to make it to the kitchen.
You spied a hamper that had been left on the kitchen counter, behind Thor. A bottle of champagne with two flutes, some bottles of spirits and a huge crate of Thors favourite ale - Peppers idea you guessed.
"Wait! Stop!" Thors tone makes you freeze on the spot, the bottle of champagne ready to be popped in one hand.
"What's wrong?" You say, concerned. Is there a spider? Oh my god. You shake your hair and pat your body in a frantic manner. "Thor what is it?" he was just stood there looking amused.
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"Nothing. I just realised this is the first time that I've had you to myself all day. I need a kiss" he moves over to you with his lips pursed in an exaggerated way.
"You idiot, I thought there was a spider" you say, giggling when he grabs hold of you and wraps his arms tightly around your waist. He rubs his rough beard against your cheek playfully, making you giggle and squirm as his bristles tickle your skin. His hands are clasped around your stomach, lifting your feet from the ground, while you try and fail to get away from him and his tickling.
"Thor, stop. I can't breath." You laugh breathlessly. 
Lifting you up effortlessly, he sits you down on the kitchen counter and nestle's himself in-between your legs. Looking at him closely, you realise just how beautiful he is and how lucky you are that he's your husband. 
"What are you thinking?" Thor asks, making you realise you were day dreaming and lost in a trance when Thor spoke.
"I'm not telling you." You tease, closing your mouth tightly.
"You do know now we're married, you have to tell me everything" 
"Everything?" You probe.
"Yes, absolutely everything."
"Fine, I was thinking about how lucky I am to be married to you." You roll your eyes at how soppy you sound, you're not usually one for romantic gestures and Thor knows that. You find it hard to take a compliment and even harder to give one. 
Thor on the other hand, found it completely natural to take and give compliments. He did however have a lifetime to perfect it, so had a slight advantage. 
"I am the lucky one" Looking in your eyes confidently as he speaks, there was definitely no denying the way he felt about you "Now stop rolling your eyes and give me a kiss." 
Thor pulls your face towards him, his lips parting when they connect with yours. The alpha in him taking control of the kiss. You follow his lead heartily, your lips moving together in perfect synchronisation. 
The way you kiss easing your mind a little, your bodies moved together fluently like they were made for each other. The excitement began to rise in you, everything was so effortless when you were together. You know now you were silly to feel worried, that as long as you let your body do the work and don't over-think things, your love for each other will lead the way. Your bodies spoke to each other like old friends, it was just your damn mind that was the problem. Which is why you planned on shutting it up with alcohol, lots of alcohol. 
"Can we go see the pool?" You break away from the kiss too quickly, leaving Thor with his lips still pursed and eyes still closed. The adrenaline was taking over and there was no time to waste.
'Anything for you, my love." He makes his way towards the stairs that lead to the garden.
"Wait, let's take this." You say holding up a bottle of tequila, limes and a couple of shot glasses, then rummaging around the cupboards to find the salt.
"Tony certainly has good taste in liquor, how did he know tequila is my favourite? Or did you have something to do with this?" You ask Thor, the mischievous grin on his face already answering your question.
"Nothing to do with me" he lies, trying to look as innocent as possible.
"Are you trying to get me drunk Mr Odinson?" You say sultrily, smiling when you see excitement flashing in his eyes.
"Of course not Mrs Odinson, now come on let's drink." He takes your hand and leads you to the stairs, you have no idea which way to go but Thor's instincts seem to know the way. The house was so big you thought it would be pretty easy to get lost in it, you wonder how many rooms there are? How many bathrooms? You couldn't wait to explore tomorrow but tonight was all about you and your husband.
                              **************
As you turn the corner, the enormous infinity pool comes into view. From where you're standing the pool appears to stretch out into the ocean, you can't wait to see the view of the ocean in the daylight. The pool is illuminated with underwater spotlights and dimly lit, warm solar lights surround the edge of it. 
"Oh my god, this is amazing!" You stand with your mouth agape looking around you while Thor comes up behind you and places his hands on your hips.
"Shall we try it out?" He asks, whispering against your neck and making you shudder in the warm breeze.
"Yes! But first…" You dangle the bottle of tequila in front of Thor.
Thor pulls a couple of sun loungers out, lifting them into the air effortlessly, like he was moving a feather and not two big, heavy, wooden sun loungers. You swoon at the sight of him, his biceps bulging against the tight fabric of his suit. The thought of running your hands all over his naked body making you feel hot and bothered. How could this beautiful man be your husband?
You realised you still had your wedding dress on when you tried to bend to sit down on the low sun lounger. The tight fabric of your dress restraining against you, threatening to tear.
"Thor, will you unzip the back of my dress please? I need to take it off" you ask nonchalantly, stretching your arms behind you and trying to reach the zip. 
"What? Here?" He asks, his mouth agape as he watches you trying to undress.
"Yes, there's no one around for miles and I can't move in this thing" 
You can hear him gulp from where you were sitting, his Adams apple bobbing in his throat as he swallows back air. You take note of the way he tugs on the collar of his shirt, loosening it slightly. Were you making him nervous? You had to admit, it made you feel good to watch your big, tough man with years of experience become nervous at your words.
"And as hot as you do look in that suit, I think it's time to take it off." 
"What do you mean?" Thor looks shocked at your forwardness. The suprise on his face almost comical.
"Have you ever done a body shot?" You ask while he unzips your dress, teasing him and enjoying it more than you should.
"What is that?" He asks, his eyes drawn to you while you step out of your heavy dress, folding it carefully and putting it on the back of the sun lounger.
"Take off your clothes and I'll show you." You smile, standing confidently in the lingerie you bought especially for this moment - a lacy, ivory all in one.
The way his eyes lingered on your body made you feel like a goddess and that hungry look in his eyes made you want to rip his clothes off.
Thor took off his jacket hastily and paused while unbuttoning his shirt, looking up at you.
"I thought you were a virgin?" He looks hurt, like you'd been lying about being a virgin for all this time.
"I said I was a virgin, you know I have experience with other things." You lift your eyebrows at him and roll your eyes.
"You just don't seem very nervous anymore?" 
"Only because I'm comfortable with you Thor, I know I can be myself with you and there's no one better for me to have my first time with." You watch Thor's tension ease, the tightness of his arms relaxing. "Now lay back." You demand, unscrewing the lid on the bottle of tequila.
Thor lays back on the lounger with his arms resting behind his head, holding his neck up so he could watch what you were doing fascinatingly. The sight of his bare chest made you feel weak, the chiselled abs sent tingles through your body. You tried to push your thoughts aside while you concentrated on pouring a shot of tequila, your hands visably shaking and spilling some of the liquid on the floor. 
You place the cut lime into Thor's mouth, the juicy part facing out and pause to giggle at how silly he looks.
"Just hold it there, ok?" Thor nods his head, his eyes lighting up with excitement.
Grabbing the salt from the side of you, you carefully pour a trial down his torso, stopping when you get to the hem of his boxers but secretly wishing you could go lower. Your pussy clenches as Thor's abs tense, restraining against the tickling of the grains of salt against his bare stomach.
Your eyes remain fixed on his as you lean over Thor to lick the trail of salt from his torso, making your way down to the hem of his boxers slowly. You quickly pour the burning liquid down your throat before snaking your way up his body, making sure to grind yourself against him as you take the lime from his mouth, he groans and pushes himself into you desperately.
"Mmm…  Well that was..  arousing. Is it my turn now?" He's already getting up from the lounger, hastily waiting for you to take his place and lay down.
Thor straddles over you, barely waiting for you to lay back and get comfy before he's pouring the salt along the swell of your breasts. You're thinking about his improvisation when you're distracted by the sultry smile and glint in his eyes as he licks his full lips with the tip of his tongue. 
You don't have time to think before he's leaning over and licking the salt from your cleavage, he downs the shot and takes the lime from your mouth. You stare wide eyed at the almost other worldly speed of your husband - why the rush?
Thor sucks on the flesh of the fruit before throwing the skin to the side and leaning in to give you a sticky, citrusy kiss. Leaving your mouth parted and wanting more when he stands up, yanks down his boxers and jumps straight into the pool. The whole thing passed by in a blur and it took you a moment for your brain to catch up and process what was happening.
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You smile down at your husband in the water as he comes up to the surface and smooths his wet hair back from his face. He looks like a damn model, the water dripping from his face.
"Come on, the waters lovely." He urged.
All of a sudden you feel shy again, you know you're not going to be able to resist each other for much longer. Understanding now why Thor was so hasty, his adrenaline was in overdrive and come to think of it, so was yours. 
Your hands begin to shake and you don't know if it's from the cool breeze or the nerves. You're feeling a little reserved now, all your big girl talk fading now the moment is almost here. You pour yourself a couple more shots and down them both one after the other, hardly whincing as the liquor burns your throat.
Finally you bite the bullet and shimmy out of your lingerie, you try to do it sexily but the tight fabric clings to your skin making you clumsy. Still, when you look up shyly through your lashes, Thor is completely oblivious to your fumbling. The way his eyes have lit up when he watched you undress fills you with pride. One last shot for good luck before you jump into the pool to join him.
The cold water sends shocks through you, making you rise to the surface gasping for air. How the hell did Thor make it look so sexy? When you look like a spluttering fish out of water.
"Let me warm you up." He glides over to you, smoothly, moving through the water like it was his natural domain. Maybe you were trying too hard? Thinking about things too deeply, you need to calm down.
The feel of his strong arms around you instantly calm you, you wrap your legs tightly around his stomach. You can feel his cock growing against you and by the way he's biting his lip you know he's struggling to restrain himself.
Thor can feel the heat of your pussy so close to his aching cock, he wants to dive inside but knows he needs to go at your pace. His feet touch the bottom of the pool and he moves over to the edge, pushing your back gently against it.
You can feel his heart racing almost as fast as yours. He kisses you deeply, pushing himself against you. Your fingers brush against his cock making him moan in your ear. The size of him makes you even more nervous.
He kisses down your neck , your bodies grinding together. This is it.
"I want you now, Thor." You say breathlessly, panting his name while his lips press to the sensitive spot on your collar bone.
"Here?" He pulls away slightly to look at you, waiting for your approval.
"Yes" you moan, feeling the tip of his cock pressing against your opening eagerly. Your pussy ready to suck him in.
He eases in slowly. The size stretching your walls in an agonisingly pleasurable way. A breathless squeel escapes your lips making Thor stop suddenly.
"Are you ok? I'm not hurting you am I?" He stops, searching your face for an answer.
"Thor it feels amazing." You whine deeply, looking into his eyes with strong, burning love. It hurt slightly as his cock stretched you open - going where no man had been before. You were so glad you'd waited and that Thor was your first but you wish you hadn't waited this long to make love to Thor.
All that time wasted, when you could have been doing this all along.This is a whole new level of love, your bodies finally coming together as one. You feel emotional with the euphoric sensations of built up tensions. 
Thor is so gentle with you, stopping to make sure your ok as he gently thrusts himself into you. The slow pace making the pleasure even more intense as his length repeatedly hits your spot. You feel your face screwing uncontrollably as a unknown sensation rises through you, making your head feel dizzy. This new feeling feels amazing but it's something you've never experienced before. Is this normal? 
You try to push your thoughts away, reminding yourself to stay in the moment.
"Are you comfortable, do you want to go inside?" Thor asks, obviously seeing the turmoil going on inside your head.
"Please. Don't stop" You urge, hoping to feel that gripping sensation once more, desperate to explore it more.
Thor bites his lip as he carries on with his slow love making, trying more than ever to keep up the slow pace even though it is torturous for him. The way your tight walls cling to his length with ferocity, making it harder for him to contain himself.
"You feel so good" he says through gritted teeth, concentrating on the way your pussy grips onto his cock.
You're taking his cock so well, the pain has disappeared and all you feel is ecstasy. You're feeling confident that you can take more, you can let him take you freely.
"Thor, fuck me faster." You say shyly. You can see his eyes light up at your words, he was waiting so patiently for you to take the lead. Your eyes roll back as he gives you his full length, groaning into you as he grips onto your ass with both hands. The sensation takes over you once more and you ride it out, giving in to it as he continues thrusting into you faster.
"Fuck." He moans, you can feel his cock twitching inside of you as you release your orgasm, screaming out his name while his cock pumps into you.
You're both left panting, while you rest your head on his shoulder. You feel like giggling, is that normal? You're overcome with emotions all at once. This was without a doubt the most amazing feeling you have ever felt, you don't want it to stop. Lucky for you, your husband has the stamina of a god.
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I can always tell when people haven't read the books and are just parroting shit they hear thinking it’s so hot when it’s icy cold so welcome to another segment of Robin Educates Ya'll With Quotes From The Series: Nico and Percy edition!
--
“I won’t tell on you,” he said. “But you have to promise to keep my sister safe.”
“I...that’s a big thing to promise, Nico, on a trip like this. Besides, she’s got Zoe, Grover, and Thalia -”
“Promise,” he insisted.
“I’ll do my best. I promise that.”
[Titan’s Curse, pg 119]
--
Bianca’s jaw tightened. “No. I’ll go.”
“You can’t! You’re new at this! You’ll die.”
“It’s my fault the monster came after us,” she said. “It’s my responsibility. Here.” She picked up the little god statue and pressed it into my hand. “If anything happens, give that to Nico. Tell him...tell him I’m sorry.”
“Bianca!” But she wasn’t waiting for me. She charged at the monster’s left foot.
[Titan’s Curse, pg 196]
--
Awestruck, I looked to Nico. “How did you-”
“Go away!” he yelled. “I hate you! I wish you were dead!”
The ground didn’t swallow me up, but Nico ran down the steps, heading toward the woods. I started to follow but slipped and fell onto the icy steps. When I got up, I noticed what I’d slipped on.
[Titan’s Curse, pg 308]
--
Annabeth and Grover helped me search the woods for hours, but there was no sign of Nico di Angelo. [Titan’s Curse, pg 309]
--
“I can’t let Nico be in any more danger,” I said. “I owe that much to his sister. I...I let them both down. I’m not going to let that poor kid suffer anymore.”
“The poor kid who hates you and wants to see you dead,” Grover reminded me.
“Maybe we can find him,” I said. “We can convince him it’s okay, hide him someplace safe.”
[Titan’s Curse, pg 310]
--
“So the Nico boy is gone now?”
“I-I guess. I tried to search for him this spring. So did Annabeth. But we didn’t have any luck. This is secret, Tyson, okay? If anyone found out he was a son of Hades, he would be in danger. You can’t even tell Chiron.”
[Battle of the Labyrinth, pg 38]
--
“Percy has been worried about you, Nico. He can help. I let him see what you were up to, hoping he would find you.”
[Battle of the Labyrinth, pg 167]
--
“We missed you at dinner,” I said. “You could’ve sat with me.”
“No.”
“Nico, you can’t miss every meal. If you don’t want to stay with Hermes, maybe they can make an exception and put you in the Big House. They’ve got plenty of rooms.”
“I’m not staying, Percy.”
“But...you can’t just leave. It’s too dangerous out there for a lone half-blood. You need to train.”
“I train with the dead,” he said flatly. “This camp isn’t for me. There’s a reason they didn’t put a cabin to Hades here, Percy. He’s not welcome, any more than he is on Olympus. I don’t belong. I have to go.”
I wanted to argue, but part of me knew he was right. I didn’t like it, but Nico would have to find his own, dark way.
[..]
“Makes sense,” I admitted. “But I hope we don’t have to be enemies.”
He lowered his gaze. “I’m sorry I was a brat. I should’ve listened to you about Bianca.”
[...]
I wasn’t sure what he meant, but I nodded. “Keep in touch, Nico.”
[Battle of the Labyrinth, pg 342-344]
--
He looked up at the Furies and took a deep breath. “I’ve done what my father asked. Take us to the palace.”
I tense. “Wait a second, Nico. What do you -”
“I’m afraid this is my new lead, Percy. My father promised me information about my family, but he wants to see you before we try the river. I’m sorry.”
“You tricked me?” I was so mad I couldn’t think. I lunged at him, but the Furies were fast. Two of them swooped down and plucked me up by the arms. [...] “All right, traitor,” I growled at Nico. “You’ve got your prize. Take me to the stupid palace.”
[The Last Olympian, pg 119/120]
--
The mountain of darkness loomed above me. A foot the size of Yankee Stadium was about to smash me when a voice hissed, “Percy!”
I lunged out blindly. Before I was fully awake, I had Nico pinned to the floor of the cell with the edge of my sword at his throat.
“Want...to...rescue,” he choked.
Anger woke me up fast. “Oh, yeah? And why should I trust you?”
“No...choice?” he gagged.
I wished he hadn’t said something logical like that. I let him go.
Nico curled into a ball and made retching sounds while his throat recovered. Finally he got to his feet, eyeing my sword warily. His own blade was sheathed. I suppose if he’d wanted to kill me, he could have done it while I slept. Still, I didn’t trust him.
[The Last Olympian, pg 129/130]
--
Nico slid off Mrs. O’Leary’s back and crumpled in a heap on the black sand.
I took out a square of ambrosia - part of the emergency god-food I always kept with me. It was a little bashed up, but Nico chewed it.
“Uh,” he mumbled. “Better.”
[...]
I caught him before he could pass out again.
[The Last Olympian, pg 132]
--
“Go back to your father,” I told Nico. “Tell him he owes me for letting him go. Find out what’s going to happen to Mount Olympus and convince him to help.”
Nico stared at me. “I...I can’t. He’ll hate me now. I mean...even more.”
“You have to,” I said. “You owe me too.”
His ears turned red. “Percy, I told you I was sorry. Please...let me come with you. I want to fight.”
“You’ll be more help down here.”
“You mean you don’t trust me anymore,” he said miserably.
I didn’t answer. I didn’t know what I meant. I was too stunned by what I’d just done in battle to think clearly.
“Just go back to your father,” I said, trying not to sound too harsh. “Work on him. You’re the only person who might be able to get him to listen.”
[The Last Olympian, pg 139/140]
--
Percy stared at his jelly donut. He had a rocky history with Nico di Angelo. The guy had once tricked him into visiting Hades’s palace, and Percy had ended up in a cell. But most of the time, Nico sided with the good guys. He certainly didn’t deserve slow suffocation in a bronze jar, and Percy couldn’t stand seeing Hazel in pain.
“We’ll rescue him,” he promised her. “We have to. The prophecy says he holds the key to endless death.”
[Mark of Athena, pg 172/173]
--
“Plans?” Hazel asked. “Nico has until sunset - at best. And this entire city is supposedly getting destroyed today.”
Percy shook himself out of his daze. “You’re right. Annabeth...did you zero in on that spot from your bronze map?”
[Mark of Athena, pg 384/385]
--
Otis trudged over to the dias, stopping occasionally to do a pile. He knocked over the jar, the lid popped off, and Nico di Angelo spilled out. The sight of his deathly pale face and too-skinny frame made Percy’s heart stop. Percy couldn’t tell if he was dead or alive. He wanted to rush over and check, but Ephialtes stood in his way.
[Mark of Athena, pg 508]
--
At Otis’s feet, Nico shuddered. Percy felt like a hellhound hamster wheel somewhere in his chest had started moving again. At least Nico was alive.
[Mark of Athena, pg 509]
--
The past week or so, Percy had imagined a lot of scathing things he might say to Nico when they met again, but the guy looked so frail and sad, Percy couldn’t muster up much anger.
[Mark of Athena, pg 536]
--
Nico’s eyes looked like shattered glass. Percy wondered sadly if something inside him had broken permanently.
[Mark of Athena, pg 539]
--
To recap: Percy never promised Nico that he wouldn't let Bianca die - he promised to do his best. Percy never promised Bianca that he would look after Nico. Percy spends months looking for Nico and never not even once told him to get lost. Nico was manipulated by Hades so that he'd bring Percy to him, and Percy was rightfully angry about it. The last person to betray Percy was Luke (and you all want Luke to die for that). Percy constantly worries about Nico.
Percy doesn't have to apologize to Nico for shit and he didn't "do him dirty" in the slightest.
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thechangeling · 3 years
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She burns like rum on a fire
Why did I do this to myself ughhhhh?
So @adoravel-fenomeno and I were talking about Kit potentially getting into an abusive relationship given that he's statistically likely too given his roots. So now I give you this fic! Sorry. Kit is using he/him in this fic because he hasn't really gone on his gender quest yet.
The title is from Cherry Wine by Hozier. I reccomend you listen to Cherry Wine and Trauma by NF while reading this.
Cw: Mentions of physical and verbal abuse, abusive, controlling behavior, negative self talk and extreme denial. Also brief mention of blood.
2013
Don't cry.
Don't cry Kit told himself over and over inside his head as he tried to get a hold of his breathing. As he lay on his bed at 2 in the morning, desperately refreshing his conversation with Autumn.
Autumn or as his best friend Janessa liked to call her "the virus" was Kit's girlfriend. His very first. A mundane with the sight. They had been dating for a few months now. When they had first gotten together everything was amazing, it so it seemed.
They had some much in common and they had fun together. Autumn was hot, funny and charasmatic. She had this way of making him feel like the only person in the room. She showered him with gifts and complements that made Kit finally feel worthy for the first time in his life.
But as time went on things shifted. Autumn insisted on spending almost ever waking second with him. Kit didn't mind at first, he loved hanging out with her. But he missed his parents and his sister, and he knew they missed him too. Whenever they had family movie night, or they wanted Kit to watch Mina, Autumn threw a fit. She insisted that he was ignoring her.
She didn't want him seeing Janessa either, or Nessie as Kit called her for short. Autumn always insisted that she was plotting to steal Kit away from her, which was ridiculous but nothing could change Autumn's mind when she was in a mood. So Kit had found himself blowing Nessie off to hang out with Autumn and making excuses for it.
Kit always felt super guilty for making Autumn so upset. He tried to get out of his agreements if it to stop her from crying but sometimes Tessa and Jem wouldn't let him. It was frustrating when they didn't understand. She would rage for awhile, calling Kit stupid and worthless. Sometimes she would make comments about him being adopted, telling him that Tessa and Jem didn't really love him and they only saw him as a free babysitter for their real child.
She would make jokes about all kinds of things. How Kit wasn't a real shadowhunter, his weight, his past, his bisexuality, his ADHD. Kit knew that Autimn didn't really mean anything by it. It was nothing personal and she didn't really mean it. She loved him. And he loved her.
Tonight had been different though. His grades had taken a turn for the worst because he had been blowing of the tutoring sessions the school had payed for as a part of his accommodations. Because he had been spending that time with Autumn. Kit knew it was a bad idea to miss those, but his girlfriend needed him. She didn't have anybody else. She couldn't count on her parents like he could, and she didn't really have any friends.
But Kit was in big trouble. Tessa and Jem were mad. The school was mad. People were saying that Kit was ungrateful.
Ah yes because every disabled person should just bend down and kiss the feet of every person that deigns to give them what they're legally entitled to.
But Kit knew that he had really screwed up this time. He tried to explain to Autumn that he couldn't see her as often as he used to anymore because he needed to fix his grades. And she absolutely lost it. Which he had been expecting.
However what Kit hadn't been expecting this time was for her to hit him.
And she hit him hard. Punched him straight in the nose. And sure it wasn't that big of a deal. Kit was a shadowhunter and he was pretty much used to being hit. But he hadn't been expecting it.
And there was just so much blood.
Autumn of course instantly apologized profusely. She kissed him over and over and told him that she loved him and she didn't mean to. And Kit knew she was telling the truth but-
But he still felt a sinking feeling in his chest that he couldn't explain.
But Kit had applied an iratze, wiped off the blood, and now everything was as good as new. When he had arrived back home, his parents had noticed anything or asked him any questions.
Now he was lying awake at 2 in the morning, filled with guilt and worry as he waited for Autumn to text him back. He gnawed on his bottom lip anxiously as he tried not to over think things.
Maybe she was still mad at him? Was there something else Kit was supposed to say or do? Or maybe he should just leave her alone for awhile?
It was maddening.
Kit turned off his phone and threw it down in frustration, pulling his giant red and black flannel over his shoulders and curling in on himself. He felt strangely exhausted, but unable to sleep. His nose and left eye socket still throbbed a little despite the fact that they should be healed.
Kit thought about using another iratze but his steele was across the room and he couldn't bring himself to stand up to go get it.
God he really was pathetic. Maybe he deserved this. Tears welled up in Kit's eyes.
Don't cry. Don't cry.
This time Kit couldn't hold it back. So he let himself cry. Tears came streaming down his cheeks as he tried to muffle his sobs with his hand. Deep down he knew it was his fault. It was always his fault.
But with Autumn he had really tried. Sure he wasn't perfect but Kit really cared about her. And it wasn't good enough. He wasn't good enough.
Kit couldn't help but think of the last time he felt like this. The last time he was rejected. He had been careful about trying to keep all thoughts of Ty Blackthorn out of his head for awhile. Autumn was a good distraction, even when she was screaming obscenities at him. It was still a distraction.
Kit closed his eyes and conjured the memory of holding Ty up on the roof. If he squeezed his eyes tightly enough, Kit could still feel the softness of his hoodie and the slight tickle of Ty's dark hair against his skin. He could conjure the smell of Ty's skin and the way he had trembled slightly against Kit's body.
I should have kissed him. Kit mused, hugging himself tightly. Just once. Even if Ty had pushed him away in disgust, it would have been worth it. Just to know what it felt like.
Suddenly from the bottom of the bed, Kit's phone lit up with a call. He scrambled to grab it, thinking it was Autumn, but it was actually Janessa. Kit cleared his throat, trying to make his voice sound normal as he answered the phone.
"Why are you calling me at 2 am Nessie?"
"The better question is why are you still awake at 2 am," she pointed out, sounding smug. "I'm a vampire. Creature of the night remember? It's kinda prime time for me Kit Kat."
Kit smiled as he felt the previous angst wash away. "Yeah fair enough. But still, why are you calling me?"
Kit heard her sigh into the phone. "Well honestly because this is probably the only time you're free now a days," she said spitefully. "You know thanks to she-who-must-not-be-named." Kit rolled his eyes.
"That's my girlfriend you're talking about, Janessa!" He snapped.
"Well your girlfriend's a total bitch!"
Normally Kit would argue with her and tell her that she was way off base. That Autumn wasn't so bad and that she was trying. That she loved him. But today he just couldn't.
He sighed, running his fingers through his hair. "We got into another fight tonight," he admitted. "Just a few hours ago actually."
"I'm sorry love," Janessa murmed. Nessie wasn't British. She was actually Canadian. But she had moved around the world with her previous band before settling in Devon and leaving them to go solo. She had picked up on some British expressions though.
"I wish you weren't going through this. But Kit, you gotta break up with her! She's bad news!"
Kit rested his face against the palm of his left hand. "I can't," he groaned.
Janessa let out a frustrated yell on the other end of the phone. "What the hell are you planning on doing Kit!? I mean are you just gonna wait into she hits you or what?" She spat.
"She already did," Kit responded instantly without missing a beat.
He gasped and slapped a hand to cover his mouth. Kit had no idea why he actually told her. Impulsivity maybe? Or maybe he just needed to get it out. But he instantly regretted it.
There was a long uncomfortable silence on the other end of the phone. Kit was just about to ask Janessa where she went when suddenly she spoke.
"I'm coming over."
Kit tried to protest but she hung up on him.
Before he had time to panic or scream or throw something, there was an aggressive tapping on his window. Of course. Janessa had vampire speed. He looked up to see Nessie perched on his windowsill looking solem.
Her long black curly hair was pulled into a high ponytail and she wore what by her standards was probably a casual outfit. A black long sleeved low cut crop top and white ripped skinny jeans tucked into thigh high heeled leather boots. And of course, she wore a full face of makeup. Even after the facial feminization surgery she was still a little insecure about going out without makeup on.
Nessie banged on his window again, more impatiently and Kit jumped up to let her in. She landed on his bedroom floor with the grace of a cat, making no sound. She stared at him silently with an expression that Kit found hard to decipher.
"Show me where," she whispered in that deep raspy voice of hers. She reached for his face and Kit let Janessa cradle his face with her hands and tried not to wince as her cold skin came into contact with his.
He shook his head. "No you won't see it, I put an iratze on it already. It's done." Janessa scoffed and stepped back.
"You know the damage isn't just skin deep Kit," she said pointedly. "No matter how much you want to pretend it is."
He glared at her. "Wow that's so insightful Nessie!," he said sarcastically. "What else you got?"
"Oh come on Kit you know I'm right," She hissed. "You have to end it!"
Kit shook his head. Why does she keep saying that?
"No. Why should I?" Kit retorted. "She loves me." He tried to sound as confident as he could, but truthfully he wasn't so sure anymore.
Autumn had gone above and beyond to make Kit feel loved and appreciated yo the point where she was almost obsessive. But she could also be cruel and spiteful. Kit had convinced himself that he should be happy with what he had because it was as good as he was gonna get.
And the sad part was that was still true.
"No she doesn't," Janessa breathed desperately. To Kit's horror, it looked like she was about to cry. Kit couldn't remember if he had ever seen her cry. Not once.
"Somebody who really loved you could never hurt you like that!" She protested shakily, her voice warbled as tears spilled down her face.
Kit could feel his tears returning at the sight of Nessie crying. He rushed towards her and pulled her into his arms, burying his face in her neck. In the comfort of his best friend's embeace he allowed himself to finally sob. He cried for that broken niave part of himself that kept getting hurt.
She rested her chin on the top of his head, (she was taller then him,) and held him close. "Please promise me you will break up with her," Janessa begged.
"I just don't get it," Kit whispered against her skin. "I did everything right. I did everything I could." He blinked back tears. "Why doesn't she love me Nessie?"
He felt her shake against him. "I don't know Kit," she sobbed. "But I love you ok? I love you and your parents love you, and Mina loves you so much!"
Kit sighed, pulling back to wipe his tears. "I know, but what if I, you know-. What if I never find someone? Like romantically?"
Janessa studied him, raising her eyebrow. "Well do you need to find someone? Who is this arbitrary someone who can give you something a friendship can't?"
That's actually a good point.
"I mean," Nessie continued, crossing her arms and shifting her weight. "If you do end up in a relationship then cool, it's whatever. But the way I see it is you shouldn't focus all of your energy on looking because you're gonna end up missing out on some pretty cool stuff in the mean time." She smiled.
Kit thought about it. He knew logically Janessa had a point. But he just couldn't feel it. He was too depressed and defeated. And as ashamed as it made him, Kit still missed Autumn. He tried to smile along with Nessie but it must have looked weak because she looked concerned.
"Hey," she cooed, reaching for him.
"Can you sing to me Nessie?" He asked. Kit  felt a little pathetic but hopefully she wouldn't judge him.
She smiled lovingly at him. "Sure." Janessa took his hand and led him to his bed.
"Any requests?" She asked as she pulled off her boots and lay down on Kit's bed. He followed her, snuggling up against Nessie with his back to her.
"No not really," he murmered, closing his eyes. Kit was finally starting to feel how exhausted he really was.
Janessa wrapped her arms around him and pulled him close, resting her head slightly against his shoulder. "Ok," she whispered very softly.
Kit heard her clear her throat softly before the sound of her breathy angelic alto filled his ears.
"I'm turning out the lights, to remember how to see. Till the renaissance takes place, Until a renaissance takes place, and resuscitates the color of paint and divinity."
Kit smiled sleepily at the sound of his enneagram song, something Janessa had introduced him to.
He yawned and let the sound of Nessie's voice lull him to sleep, putting all thoughts of Autumn behind him.
In my head Kit is like 5'4 and Janessa is 5'9. Originally I had her at 5'11 but I wanted her to be closer in height to Kit. Also did I name Kit's abusive girlfriend Autumn after my toxic controlling ex best friend? You bet I did!
Tag list: (you know the deal) @playwithravenclaw @lavender-scented-rat @jazzkaurtheglorious @waterlillies   @nott-the-best @stxr-thxif @magnus-the-fabulous-entp-bane @foxglove-airmid @littlx-songbxrd @clarys-heosphoros @queenlilith43 @arangiajoan @hardlymatters @the-wckd-powers @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @adoravel-fenomeno
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daincrediblegg · 2 years
Note
While I do hate Bev Keane with a passion, mostly because she reminds me of people I've met in my life, the other part just because she's who she is as a person... but I do not blame her one bit when it comes to Father Paul. Imagine being face-to-face with a young-again John who's a vampire and wears skinny jeans, like if I were her, I wouldn't be able to take my hands and eyes off him either
god what a mood. I know she's like... supposed to be the apex predator of american evangelists but like... man she fascinates me on a few levels for some reason.
On the one hand like yeah god I get it- she wants to be his fucked up lil mary magdelene like so bad and she's always so fucking obvious about it and I'm like "mood" like I get it with all that tender touching and shit. but then I get territorial about it and mentally whip out a knife bc " lol BACK OFF" because thou shalt not suffer a xenophobic bitch to live.
And THEN there's another part of me that wonders how much of her is really just a repressed queer person also (bi? lesbian? who the fuck knows not me not with father paul in the mix). I mean her whole thing with Erin kindof made me think about it and reminded me a little of Teenage Bounty Hunters (in which two feuding teenagers who go to catholic school actually DO discover they're in lesbians with each other and man I'm so fucking mad that show got cancelled it's not even funny) and... just makes me think. Like she seems to also be EXTREMELY nosy about everything Erin is doing (more often than not her little "snoop but don't be suspicious" looks are in relation to her- i.e. watching her talk to riley, noticing when she comes out of the gunning house to walk to easter vigil. etc.)
and then we get back to pulling out the knife again because of the whole thing with Sheriff Hassan and literally threatening to implicate him in her crime- let alone her CONSTANT islamophobia and the outright racist shit like god hold me back boys because these hands want to swing so fucking bad
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luci-in-trenchcoats · 4 years
Text
I Got You (Part 1)
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Summary: The reader is celebrating her two year anniversary with her fiance when her best friend from childhood, Jensen, calls. Something’s wrong with him and he tries to play it off once he remembers what night it is for her but the reader isn’t budging and that may be a good thing for the both of them...
Pairing: Jensen x reader
Word Count: 4,000ish
Warnings: language, angst, vomiting, lying, mention of alcoholism, fluff
A/N: This is a little different for me but I’m really please with how it turned out. Enjoy!
_______
“This looks delicious, babe,” said Andrew as he sat down at the table. You hummed, a little annoyed that he hadn’t let you know he’d be home two hours late. On your anniversary. Your two year anniversary. You wouldn’t mind if he ever let you know but he never, never did and always got mad when you brought it up. You poked at the food and he took a bite, making a face. “It’s a little cold.”
“Well that’s what happens when you reheat it in the microwave,” you said. He bit his tongue and continued to eat quietly, a bit of tension still in the air.
“How was your day?” he asked when he was nearly done with his food.
“Fine. Yours?” you asked, picking at your salad and ignoring the chicken.
“Good. I’m sorry I was late, babe. Why don’t we go out to eat?” he asked.
“It’s our anniversary. I wanted to make you dinner,” you said.
“I ate it,” he said. “You seem hungry still.”
“I’m fine. I just want to watch a movie or something,” you said. He didn’t say anything as he ducked into the bedroom and changed out of his suit and into some sweats and a hoodie. You cleaned up the dishes and went to the bedroom. You grabbed leggings and an old big t-shirt of Jensen’s you’d stolen from his place somewhere around season 10 if you had to guess by the number just under the back collar. You padded into the bathroom and changed out of your skinny jeans and crop top. You took off the new black lingerie you had on and put on something more comfortable. Andrew wouldn’t even notice.
You walked out of the bedroom and found him on the couch, watching some action movie. You sat down in his side and saw your phone light up at the end of the couch. A glance showed it was Jensen and that you had four missed calls from him.
“Did you put my phone on silent?” you asked, reaching over for it.
“It is our anniversary,” he said.
“Yeah and I’m also one of Jensen’s emergency contacts,” you said, rolling your eyes and quickly answering. “Jay?”
“Hey, Y/N,” he said. Something was wrong. His voice was off and it took him a minute to talk again. “Can you come over? I just found out something and I could use you right now.”
“I thought you were in Toronto this week to film for The Boys,” you said.
“I was. Flew down to Dallas for my brother’s birthday earlier. More free time and all, trying to see the family more,” he said.
“What’s he want?” sighed Andrew. You ignored him and heard Jensen take a shaky breath.
“Did someone die?” you asked quietly.
“No,” he said. “No. I found out something though and...I just grabbed a rental car and drove home the past few hours. I had to get out of there.”
“Are you alright?” you asked, already hating the pit forming in your stomach. You’d known him most of your life. You didn’t remember life without him to be honest. Sure, he was away a lot when he filmed but he was back more often now that he was doing shorter gigs and you’d always been there for each other, even during the really busy years. “Buddy.”
“No, I don’t think I’m okay,” he said. He was quiet before you heard him suck in a gasp. “Fuck. It’s your anniversary. Shit, I’m sorry, Y/N. God, like Andrew doesn’t hate me enough already. I’m so sorry. Please enjoy your night, I’ll be fine.”
“You’re my best friend and you are so not alright,” you said. “I’m gonna come over.”
“It’s our anniversary!” said Andrew as you turned to glare at him.
“Y/N, don’t. I’m-” said Jensen as you got up.
“Where the fuck are you going?” said Andrew.
“Jensen is important to me, Andrew. He’s always gonna be important to me. I know you don’t like him but he needs me right now. You don’t even care. You didn’t care about dinner or the anniversary or putting in a little bit of effort. I used to really like you too, you know. When we got engaged though, I saw what you really wanted. Well guess what. I’m not your mother. I’m not your maid and I faked it every time,” you said.
“You’re mad at me? He’s the one ruining our anniversary!” said Andrew.
“Y/N, I’m gonna go. I’m sorry,” said Jensen before you heard him hang up. You groaned and went over to the front hall to grab your jacket. You shoved your phone in your pocket as Andrew stalked over.
“Gonna go sleep with your other boyfriend, hm?”
“Something bad happened to him and frankly, the day I introduced you to him was the day you started all this. You have hated my relationship with him from the start. He has tried so hard to be your friend and you’re always mean and you leave him out. Even your friends think it’s a dick move.”
“You want your best friend or me? Cause I don’t like him and I’m never going to,” he said. 
“I hope you treat the next girl better,” you said. You took off your ring and slammed it on the front table before grabbing your keys and tugging on your boots.
“Whore,” he mumbled.
“I’d rather be his whore than your wife any day. I’ll move my stuff out tomorrow,” you said. You slammed the door shut after yourself and took a deep breath. You weren’t as upset as you thought you’d be. You’d been considering taking a break with him for the past few months but there was no going back after that. Jensen had never been anything but kind to him and always respectful of your and Andrew’s time together.
You skipped down the stairs of the apartment building and down to the garage, rushing over to your car quickly. Something was still very wrong with Jensen and you needed to get to him asap.
“Jensen,” you said twenty minutes later, finding him outside on the balcony off his bedroom, sitting in a chair with his knees tucked to his chest. There was a half full large bottle of whiskey on the ground and the plastic wrapper from where he’d opened it. His back was to you and he turned his head away as you stepped outside. “Jay, what happened.”
“I don’t want to talk about it,” he said. You put a hand on his forehead and forced him to look at you. He was drunk. He didn’t start drinking until he’d hung up with you obviously. He was upset too and it was so rare of you to see him cry. 
“Come on,” you said, grabbing his arm. He let you tug him up and into his bathroom. You flipped on the light in the toilet and sat him down in front of it. “Did you eat dinner? Yes or no?”
“No,” he mumbled, shaking his head.
“Did you eat on the plane? At the airport?”
He shook his head again and you sighed.
“You just did about, I don’t know, seven, eight shots on an empty stomach. You’re not a kid anymore so if Taylor Gregson’s senior party is anything to go by, I expect you to start puking in the next three minutes.”
“Go away,” he said, wiping off his face.
“Yeah, see no, not happening. I’m also staying here tonight whether you want me to or not. Now sit, throw up in the toilet please, and I will make you something bland to eat and get you some not snot covered clothes, okay?”
“Why are you so nice to me?” he asked. He stared up at you and you instantly knelt down, giving him a hug as he hiccuped. 
“Cause you’re my best friend and I love you,” you said. “Jensen. What happened?”
“Don’t wanna…” he said, shaking his head.
“Did someone die?” you asked.
“No,” he said again. 
“What did you find out? Something with your brother? You said you were at his birthday party.”
“Later please,” he said quietly.
“Okay,” you said. You rubbed up and down his back and you felt him lurch a bit before you shut your eyes and felt wetness on your back. “Did you just throw up on me?”
“Yeah. Sorry,” he said.
“Really is like Taylor Gregson’s party all over again,” you said. “You stay here and I’m gonna take a shower.”
“I got it in your hair I think,” he said. He lurched again but you turned him towards the bowl and he was successful that time. “Ow.”
“Relax,” you said, running a clean hand through his hair for a beat. His body untensed a little but he was still upset and making a mess of himself. “Five minutes and then the shower is yours.”
You took about ten to deal with your hair and you ducked next door to his closet, finding some fresh clothes for the two of you. He managed to not get any sick on himself so after wiping his face off good and getting him to brush his teeth, he looked a little better. You found some pancake mix in the cupboard and started to work on that while he changed. He eventually came out, red eyed and sniffling a bit but he looked sober at least.
“Andrew’s gonna kill me for ruining his night,” he said.
“Andrew and I are over,” you said, waiting for the pan to heat up. Jensen stared as you shook up the jug. “He has always been an ass to you.”
“Y/N. I’m just...he’s your fiance. You’re supposed to prioritize him.”
“He’s supposed to respect people I care about. He is immature and arrogant and mean and he sucks so bad in bed. God, I’ve been dying to tell you how shitty ass of a fuck he is. The most damn selfish little prick I’ve ever met in my life and-”
“Y/N,” said Jensen. You took a deep breath and poured some batter on the pan. “You didn’t breakup cause of me, did you?”
“No. You were just the last straw. You didn’t call cause you wanted a ride or to talk about something that could be done later. You need me. I don’t care if it’s two in the morning, Christmas, my wedding day. You ever call me like that, you ever make me worry like this, I’ll be there in a fucking second,” you said. He lowered his head as you got a plate out for his dinner.
“I’m sorry for scaring you,” he said.
“If you thought I was busy, why didn’t you call Jared? He lives three minutes away. Three,” you said. He shrugged and you sighed. “I never want to see you doing something like that ever again. I never want you to-”
“I’m not a child,” he shot back, suddenly shooting daggers at you, his face hard and green eyes a too dark shade.
“My father is an alcoholic. You want to call him up? We’ll call him up right fucking now and he’ll tell you how it nearly destroyed his life. He is twenty years sober and he can’t have a drink for the rest of his life because he used it when he was in pain. You will never, Ackles, and I mean never, drink to mask pain again in your life,” you said. The pancake was burning and you broke away your glare, dumping the burnt batter into the trash. When you walked back, Jensen was crying at the counter again and you shut your eyes. “I’m sorry for yelling at you. I just...you know how my mom used to have me sleepover your house in the middle of a school week cause he was drunk and she didn’t want me to see it. You know how much it used to bother me. Little shrimpy ass Jensen, you would always tell me to sleep in your bed and you took the sleeping bag. I let you take care of me my whole life. You’re bigger than me, stronger than me. You will never worry about money again. You gave me rent money when I got laid off and refused to let me pay it back. You drove me home when I got drunk at a bar after a fight with Andrew. You stood up for me in seventh grade cause I liked science and Harrison Pitt was a dick to me back then. This is not me treating you like a child, Jensen. This is me helping my best friend because he’s in pain and I can’t stop it. All I can do is make him damn pancakes.”
“Can I have maple syrup?” he asked quietly after a few minutes. 
“Of course. I’ll get butter too,” you said. You cut up a few pieces and gave them along with the syrup to him. You made up more pancakes to reheat for breakfast, Jensen sniffling to himself as he ate. “Feel any better?”
“A little,” he said. “You were always too good for Andrew.”
“I always knew you didn’t like him,” you said. “But you tried. That’s what was important and a concept he apparently couldn’t understand. Good riddance. Oh and I kinda need a place to crash for a bit after my epic walkout.”
“I got plenty of room,” he said. He pushed his plate away when he finished and washed it up in the sink, grabbing the pan as you put away the leftovers.
“Even miserable you have far better manners,” you said with a small smile. He left the pan on the counter to dry and you wrapped your hands around his arm, leading him back to his bedroom and sitting him down. “It’s later. What happened?”
“My whole family’s been lying to me my whole life,” he said. He sat against the headboard and wiped off his nose. “My great aunt, like the super old one, she made a comment and then made a little face like I wasn’t supposed to know something. I mentioned it to my brother and he seemed coy but I knew then it was true. So I confronted my parents and...well it turns out that I’m adopted.”
“You’re what?” you said, scrunching up your face.
“Adopted. When I was an infant. They were never going to tell me,” he said.
“I don’t understand. I mean you kinda look like your dad and even your brother a bit and your sister has your nose.”
“Coincidence,” he said. “I’m a reject baby. I was given up because the couple that had me? They didn’t want me. I looked them up when I got home. Two hot shot lawyers at some big firm in New York. Three kids. Didn’t want this fuck up of one though. I was an accident. A mistake.”
“Jensen,” you said, wrapping your arms around him. “Jensen, you’re not...so many people get adopted. Your family loves you. You’re so much better off with who you wound up with. They adopted you because they loved you. Jensen they-”
“She used to be my mom’s friend. They adopted me because they felt sorry for me. They didn’t love me. They pitied me. They lied to me my whole life. I heard stories about when she was pregnant and the labor and they were all lies. My brother’s always known. My sister is the only one who didn’t. The whole family knew. They knew about the pathetic little baby that no one wanted the whole time,” he said.
“Hey,” you said, climbing into his lap and grabbing his arms. “You are not pathetic. I have met your parents and your family. Some nights when we were little I wanted them to be my parents. I wanted normal parents. You had the ideal family. You have the ideal family.”
“They admitted they were never going to tell me,” he said. “How fucked up is that?”
“They made a mistake in not telling you. You should have known all along,” you said, fixing the stray hairs falling over his forehead. “If I know anything though it is that they love you unconditionally. You gotta forgive them. They wanted you. You are their son and brother. They adopted you because they loved you. It sounds like your mom stopped being friends with this woman. I wonder why that was,” you said. He shut his eyes and rested his head on your chest. You shushed him as he got upset again, kissing the top of his head.
“You’re not hiding any secrets from me are you?” he asked, arms wrapped tightly around your back.
“I’ve been waiting for you to ask me out since I was thirteen years old,” you said. He raised his head up and you smiled. “S’okay. I know I’m not your-”
He kissed you out of nowhere, hand cupping the back of your neck, one long, smooth motion as you felt wetness on your cheeks. He moved back slowly, dropping his hands away, swallowing thickly.
“Sorry,” he said. You smiled and moved closer, wrapping your legs around his waist.
“Nothing to be sorry for,” you said. “Always thought I wasn’t your type.”
“You were. I was too young to understand what it was that I felt. No one’s ever felt like you. And I can’t lose you too so I played it safe. Now...I’d rather get this out of the way so I can feel miserable for the rest of my life.”
“You think our friendship is over?” you asked.
“You were engaged an hour ago and I just kissed you. Of course it’s-”
“You’re ridiculous, Ackles, I swear,” you mumbled against his lips. “Like I said, I will always be there. Now I’d love nothing more than to fulfill every teenage fantasy and adult one if I’m being fair right now. But tonight’s not the night for that. Tonight, let out whatever you’re feeling and tomorrow, we’ll talk to your folks.”
You sat back and smiled, Jensen staring at you with soft wet eyes and you remembered the little boy waiting outside school, trying not to be upset. You lay down next to him and recalled the day you met.
“Hi,” you said, the boy turning away. “Why you crying?”
“I’m not crying,” he said.
“You look like you’re crying,” you said, walking around his other side. You heard a car horn honk and looked ahead to see your dad behind the wheel of the car. You looked around and saw no other other cars there, the boy wiping his face off. “Where’s your mom or dad?”
“I don’t know,” he said. “They said they’d be right here after school.”
“Y/N!” called your dad.
“We’re waiting!” you said back, the boy looking at you.
“For what?” asked your dad.
“What’s your name?” you asked.
“Jensen Ackles,” he said quietly.
“Jensen Ackles’ parents!” you said. Your dad sighed but he just sat back in his seat and turned up the radio. “I’m Y/N Y/L/N.”
“I know. You got the blue backpack. All the other girls got pink ones,” he said.
“I like blue. I like pink too but I like blue more,” you said. “I like the cars on your backpack.”
“Thanks. Do you like cars?”
“Yeah,” you said. You sat down and took off your bag, pulling out a few hot wheels from the bottom of it. “Mom said I could bring them as long as I didn’t lose ‘em. Wanna play while we wait?”
“Okay,” he said, taking a seat next to you.
By the time you and Dean were being called over, the sky was a little dimmer and you saw your dad talking to a couple outside the car.
“I think I gotta go home now,” you said.
“Me too. I see you tomorrow,” he said, holding out the car he’d been playing with.
“You keep it in case you got to wait again. Then you’re not bored. I’ll wait with you though if dad says it’s okay,” you said. “Okay?”
“Okay,” he said. He gave you a hug and you smiled as you returned it. “Do you want to be best friends?”
“Yeah! That’s so cool!” you said. 
“Awesome!” he said. You both packed up and ran over to your parents, your dad chuckling as you waved bye to Jensen.
“Make a new friend on your first day?” he asked.
“That’s Jensen. He’s my best friend forever now,” you said. “That’s how it works. I know. Jensen’s got an older brother and he told him all about it.”
“I see. Well buckle up. I’m sure mom’s wondering where we are,” he said. You climbed in the back and saw his parents give a wave as they drove past. “That was real nice of you to talk to that boy when he was upset like that.”
“I didn’t like him crying, made me feel funny,” you said. “Like my chest had a tummy ache.”
“Oh, you’re going to prom with that boy aren’t you,” he mumbled.
“What’s prom?”
“A very, very long way away. Let’s go home, sweetheart.”
“I remember our first day too,” said Jensen. “I’m always a blabbering mess around you, aren’t I.”
“I think I understand what that tummy ache in my chest was. It’s that same feeling I got when you called earlier. I think we really were too young to understand back then what it was that we were experiencing.”
“You mean how I’ve been in love with you since I was five years old,” he chuckled. “Y/N. I still feel really, and I mean really, really shitty. But thank you for coming over. I need you, more than even I know I think.”
“I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere,” you said. You kissed him and he smiled, closing his eyes. “You want to sleep? You had a long flight and drive, not to mention day.”
“Yeah, I want to crash. I’m exhausted,” he said. You moved to get up but he sat up with you, watching you carefully. He swallowed again and you threw back the covers, climbing underneath them. 
“Not going anywhere,” you said. He got underneath with you and heard him breathe a deep breath, no sniffles in sight for the first time all night. “Jensen.”
“Yeah?” he asked.
“It’ll be okay,” you said. “I promise.”
“I know. Not looking forward to tomorrow is all,” he said.
“Well I’m going with so...can’t be all bad,” you said.
“No. Like you said back then, I stick with you, I’ll be alright,” he said. “Can you get the room light?”
“Sure,” you said. You hopped out of bed and turned off the big light, walking over to his nightstand and finding the switch. You smiled when you saw the hot wheel car on there, Jensen smiling softly as he looked up at you. “Night Jensen.”
“Good night, Y/N.”
______
A/N: Read Part 2 here!
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atc74 · 3 years
Text
Eye of the Beholder
Warnings: Poor body image (?), slight angst, a little envy, a lot of fluff, and implied sexy times
Summary: Jensen is feeling less confident in himself lately and you think you know why. He has always been there for you, now you just need to show your husband he has no reason to be. 
Pairing: Jensen x Reader
Word Count: 1470
Written for: @breakthezone​ first quarter challenge, which was to choose one of two prompts. Mine is bolded below. 
Beta’d by: @amanda-teaches​, cause she is the best
A/N: So you know the pictures, the spread, the article in THAT magazine, featuring that beautiful soul, and that would cause any man to think less of himself, but I thought, what would go through Jensen’s head and how would I help him through it. 
Like Jensen’s Warmth? Buy it here from @scentsfromthebunker!
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The cold snowy mountains were a stark contrast to the warm flatland of their home state, but Y/N was loving the quietness and solace of the northeast. Y/N pulled into the snow-covered driveway and started unloading the groceries. She planned accordingly and for weeks at a time; they didn’t have many delivery options out there. 
“Honey, I’m home! What do you say you come help me carry in and put away all this food and I make you a nice, juicy porterhouse for dinner?” Y/N called from the kitchen as she dropped the load on the counter. “Honey? Jay?” The house was mostly silent but then she heard it. The distinct smack of fists and feet hitting the heavy bag Jensen installed in the home gym. She sighed knowing this was the third day in a row Jensen had spent hours in the gym, working out until he was ready to drop. 
Y/N brought in the rest of the bags, stored the food, and changed her clothes. If she was going to join him in the gym, at least she could participate. It wasn’t like it was a hardship watching her husband in only a pair of shorts, his freckled skin dripping with sweat. 
She brought fresh water with her, setting it on the weight bench. He was breathing heavy, sweating, and red-faced. Jensen was not out of shape by any means, but he somehow had gotten it in his head that he needed to get into better shape. Maybe it was the pressure of becoming Soldier Boy, maybe it was that he was approaching his “mid-forties”, it could have been a few things, but Y/N thought she knew exactly what had prompted this new obsession. “Hey, honey.”
“Hey, babe,” he rasped, his breaths heavy with exertion, his hair soaking. “Just a few more minutes.” He landed another two punch kick combo. 
“Jay, you have got to take a break. You can’t keep going like this, hours a day, day after day,” Y/N pleaded with him. “This is enough for today.” 
“Yeah, okay. Maybe you’re right.” He stopped, hugging the bag tightly, holding on as he tried to catch his breath. 
“Go shower, I’ll get dinner started, okay?” Y/N smiled, kissing him softly. 
“You got it. I’m pretty sure I reek anyway.” 
Leafy greens and brightly colored vegetables covered the kitchen island as Y/N chopped and sliced away. The cuts of meat were sitting out to warm up before grilling, and a nice bottle of a full-bodied red was breathing on the table. Jensen emerged from the hallway leading from their bedroom about thirty minutes later, looking a little worse for the wear. He pressed a sweet kiss to her cheek, swiping a handful of peppers, too. 
“I saw that mister,” she smiled, leaning into his touch. “But I’m gonna let it slide just ‘cause you smell nice.” 
“Better than before?” 
“Oh, way better,” she laughed, turning and wrapping her arms around his neck. “Want to tell me what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” 
“Nothing, babe. Just trying to stay in shape. I gotta get in that custom suit in a couple of weeks, and I ain’t getting any younger.” Jensen looked down, running a hand over his face, scratching at his beard. 
“That’s all, huh?”
“Yeah, just running isn’t gonna cut anymore. I have to keep up.” 
“Keep up with…?”
Jensen pretended he didn’t hear Y/N as he started helping with the salad. If he ignored the question, maybe she would let it go. It seemed to be working, for now, so he went with it, and continued to help her with dinner. 
“Jay, these look perfect!” Y/N gushed as she cut into the steak. She placed the bite in her mouth, the flavor exploding, and she moaned around it. “Oh my god, it's practically melting in my mouth!” 
“You made it easy with a superb cut of meat, babe,” Jensen shrugged, digging into his salad and grilled vegetables. 
All through dinner, Y/N noticed how he barely touched his meat or wine, but took extra helpings of the healthy stuff. She decided she would let it go, wanting to enjoy their meal, but soon enough, the dishes were cleared and leftovers stored. 
“Jay?” Y/N asked, rinsing the plate in her hand before handing it to her husband. “Can I ask you something?”
“Babe, you can ask me anything, you know that.” 
“And promise me you won’t get mad?” 
“I won’t get mad, but now I am a little suspicious,” Jensen raised one eyebrow, looking over at his wife. 
“Does your new workout regimen have anything to do with Jared’s spread in Men’s Health?” 
“No.” Jensen protested immediately. 
“Jay…” 
“Maybe,” he sighed, throwing the towel on the counter, then he turned, leaning against it. “Am I...soft?”
“Soft? I think you are the kindest, most generous, loving man I’ve ever known,” Y/N replied honestly. “I am lucky I found you and even luckier that you love me.” 
“Well, thank you for that, babe, but I was asking about my physical appearance,” Jensen hung his head, his voice getting quieter as he talked. “Do I have a ‘dad bod’?” 
“Jensen Ross Ackles, you listen to me right now. You have never looked better and you are in the best shape of your life. You just completed a 15 year run on the most successful sci-fi television show in history, you are stepping into an iconic role that you were hand-picked for, and if a ‘dad bod’ looks like this, then yes!” Y/N gestured to her husband while rambling on trying to make her point. “No, you know what? Come here, come sit down with me. Bring the wine.” 
Y/N sat down with her laptop, intent on showing her husband the proof he needed to believe her and believe in himself. Jensen sat down next to her, handing her a fresh glass, as she pulled up photo after photo on the screen. 
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“Do you see what I see?”
“No, I see a skinny kid from Texas with no hair on his chest and barely-there abs,” he scoffed. 
“Okay, you still don’t have chest hair, but what else do you see?” She prompted him again. 
“A pudgy mid-section and that was before I turned 40!” 
“Do you want to know what I see?” 
“You’re biased.” 
“You’re damn right I am, but I do know that your fans, the Dean-girls, well, they’re not wrong. Did you know that according to several fan sites, you and Dean have way more fans than Jared and Sam? And are you telling me that millions of people are wrong?”
“Millions?” he asked skeptically. 
“Okay, well, maybe not millions, but a lot! But I see a man that is in better shape than he was twenty years ago. I see a skinny kid from Texas too. But I also see a man who now is in the best shape of his life and way sexier than that skinny kid.. What is it that you’re always telling me when I complain about my baby muffin top or my thunder thighs?”
“That bodies come in all shapes and sizes, and beauty isn’t defined by your body shape; it’s defined by your soul and you are the most beautiful woman I have ever laid eyes on.” 
“Okay, and I usually argue with you when you do, but that doesn’t mean you’re wrong. We are our own worst critics, you know that. But I see a healthy body and strong arms. Arms that hold me better than any others on the planet. Arms that hold our children and comfort them when they are hurt. I see a sexy mind and a stunning soul, one that was made for me.” 
“Okay, I think that is enough wine for you,” Jensen reached for the glass, but you moved it out of his reach. 
"Have I entered an alternate universe or did you really just crack a smile for me?"
“Fine, it could have been a smile.” 
“Oh yeah?” 
“Yeah, my exceptionally sexy wife made a pretty good point.” 
“Oh? Tell me more.”
“Well, she may also be the smartest person I know. She always knows just what to say when my dumbass is being, well a dumbass.” 
“Yeah, I am pretty damn smart. Because you know what else I did? I made arrangements for your visiting parents to keep the children overnight so they can swim until they pass out.”
“Wow, that is pretty smart. You know, I’ve been working out and I bet I could carry you all the way upstairs without breaking a sweat.”
“Oh, you’re on Ackles, but you are wrong about one thing.”
“What’s that?” 
“We will definitely be working up a sweat!”
The Whole Enchilada: @iwantthedean​ @dolphincliffs​ @mrswhozeewhatsis​ @flamencodiva​ @blacktithe7​  @amanda-teaches​ @hannahindie​  @kickingitwithkirk​  @wi-deangirl77​ @hobby27​​ @gh0stgurl​ @alleiradayne​ @idreamofplaid​ @manawhaat​ @crashdevlin​  @fangirlxwritesx67​ @winchesterprincessbride​ @waywardbeanie​ @jensengirl83​ @anathewierdo3467​  @winchest09​ @michellethetvaddict @magssteenkamp @waywardbaby  thewinchesterandreidwhore @anathewierdo
The Jensen’s Jamboree: @jerkbitchidjitassbutt​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @adoptdontshoppets​ @supernatural-jackles​ @fandom-princess-forevermore​ @akshi8278​ @thing-you-do-with-that-thing​ @deanwanddamons​ @rockhoochie​
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giorno-plays-piano · 4 years
Text
Cry Little Sister
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Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader
Warnings: yandere, obsession, verbal threats, gaslighting, both reader and Peter are high school students, kinda slight incestuous undertones (the characters aren't related, though).
Words: 2214.
Summary: Your adopted older brother is not as nice as he seems, but no one is willing to believe you.
P.S. And yep, I used one of my favourite citations from Grishaverse in the end of this story. Hope you enjoy!
__________
"Peter, sweetheart, I knew you'd make it!" Your mother had clasped her hands together while your father patted Peter's shoulder. "The best test results in the whole class! My goodness, we need to celebrate it!"
You smiled at them tiredly, seeing the faces of your parents practically glowing. True, Peter was a damn smart guy. You had never achieved such high results despite all those nights you spent studying, while he didn't care much about it at all, it seemed. You hadn't seen him with a book yet.
"I'm gonna bake an apple pie for you." A smile of your mother made you feel bitter, and you averted your eyes, missing an odd look your older adopted brother sent you.
Half a year ago he finally came to live with your family once your parents finished gathering all the papers and waited for almost a year to receive "the call". You remembered how you had jumped happily in the living room along with your mom, believing it was finally over. Well, maybe it was over for Peter, but for you it was only a beginning. You could hardly imagine the sweet skinny guy who you considered very shy and bashful would change so drastically.
It started very subtle. First, Peter was trying to be helpful, assisting you when you did the housework - he was actually way better at cooking and cleaning than you and easily got praised by your mom. You were truly thankful to him for his help, especially since it was easier to get to know him while working together. It was then when you first spotted the odd looks he was sending you when he thought you didn't see. There was something... uneasy lingering in his gaze. You couldn't quite put your finger on it, but sometimes Peter made you shiver with the way he spoke or touched you discreetly. It was strange. Of course, the boy didn't do or tell you something that would make you worried, but you just couldn't shake the feeling that something wasn't right. You blamed it on the fact you couldn't get accustomed to a new life with an adopted brother yet. Surely, it wasn't supposed to be easy?
But the more you spent time together, the stronger that feeling got. Despite Peter becoming a part of your family as easily as if he had always been your parents' son, you were wary of his sudden urges to touch you and always keep you in his sight. At first you thought he was just touch starved and needed human warmth. Maybe for Peter it was just easier to come to you rather than your parents since you were almost the same age as him.  But then... one day you saw him going through your things and taking one of your lipsticks from your makeup bag. You suddenly remembered losing a lip gloss two weeks ago.
Trying to voice your concerns, you talked to your mom who was so insensitive she went to speak with Peter right away. Of course, he said it wasn't true and you had probably misunderstood him since he only wanted to borrow a pen. He even showed his table and wardrobe to demonstrate he didn't hide anything.
From that time Peter had changed. He didn't hide his unhealthy behavior from you anymore, and he was scaring you with the things he had done, keeping an eye on you when you were around and stalking you if you were not, never staying far away aside from the time he had to be in class.
Of course, he sensed that you were becoming resteless, less and less eager to spend time with him, blaming it on lots of homework or sudden meetings with friends. You weren't blind to his frightening affection - if you could call his feelings like that. Why was he doing it? Despite spending only several months living with you, your parents loved him dearly, paying him twice more attention than you. You had never protested against it, knowing a poor soul like him who didn't have his own family needed all the help he could get now. But this... this wasn't alright. This wasn't a feeling siblings should have for each other. Did Peter consider you one? Did you truly consider him your older brother? You weren't sure. Nevertheless, it still didn't feel right.
Carefully, you attempted to talk to your father about it, vagualy wording your concerns and giving him little details - sure, you didn't like how Peter was behaving, but he didn't deserve to be banished from your family and sent back. You still believed something could be done to set everything right. Maybe the boy just didn't realize things were not supposed to work this way in a family. However, your father laughed it all off. He said little girls like you were thinking too much of themselves lately, claiming the whole world was obsessed with them. Peter simply tried to be a good brother and look out for you.
You had never felt more humiliated in your entire life.
Dropping all attempts to bring Peter's unhealthy behaviour to your parents' attention, you decided there was just one thing to do - separate yourself from him completely.
No more doing the housework together, no more chats in the kitchen in the morning, no more having lunch together at school, no more cuddles in the evening. You kept yourself as busy as you could - in the morning you did jogging, at school you spent time with your friends, in the evening you were taking your books and doing your homework in the park, at your friend's place or anywhere convenient. Even though Peter tried following you, you had started to change places all of a sudden to keep him away from you.
This was when he had enough of you distancing yourself.
Suddenly, Peter fighted for affection of your parents with such ferocity as if you tried to strip him of their love. His gradea were suddenly way better than yours - he claimed he had finally felt safe in his new home and could spent his energy elsewhere. The way he behaved was even more sweet than before. On the other hand, strange things started happening to you: once your mother found your expensive satin blouse torn and blamed it on you and your carelessness; the other time the chicken you cooked was so salty it ended in a trash bin; your friend received threats coming from your phone number, though you had never ever sent anything like that to her.
It was easy to guess who was doing this to you, but Peter never admitted it out loud. Talking to your parents was worthless, too, as in their eyes the boy was a pure blessing. How could you blame him for things you did to catch their attention?
Shit. You knew something was wrong with Peter, but you could hardly imagine to what extent he could go to have his way. It was unbelievable a boy like him could manipulate people so easily, wrapping them around his finger. Why was he doing it? Everyone already loved him. Everyone but you.
"Y/N!" Your mother's sharp voice broke the silence, and you hurried downstares, finding your mom near the washing machine with a wet black sock in her hands. "Are you out of your mind?! Did you put your black socks in there when I said to bring your WHITE clothes?!"
"But I didn't!" You gawked at her, knowing perfectly you only brought her what she asked you to. "I swear I didn't!"
"Oh yes, of course, it's Peter who went through your dirty clothes to incriminate you, dear." She sneered at you. "You have to come up with a new excuse, this is getting old. Look what you've done, my white jeans are ruined!"
"Please, mom, I-"
"Go to your room. I don't want to see or hear you." She snapped, tossing the sock to the floor as you stared at her in horror. She had never been so irritated like in the past month when your "slip-ups" were happening more and more often.
Racing upstairs, you pressed your hand to your mouth, trying not to cry. Why was he still doing it to you? Why did Peter want everything to be like he wished? Why did your parents never believe you? It was you who was their true daugther, for God's sake!
Locking the door, you fell down on your bed, burying your head in your soft pillow. It started to become unbearable. Why was this all happening? Despite your growing hate towards Peter, you couldn't say that he was ugly and unpleasant. He was easy on the eyes and could be really nice to people around him, and it made Peter quite popular among the girls at school. Why on Earth didn't he set his eyes on anyone other than you? There were plenty of girls who'd be willing to date him and give him as much attention as he wanted.
You wiped away your angry tears with your pillow, biting on your lower lip. It was unfair, and you weren't going to give in to him just because Peter wanted to play with you like a spoiled child. You'd find a way to prove you weren't guilty of all those things he wanted to pin on you, you just needed to gather yourself and think properly.
Suddenly, you heard someone knocking on your window and rushed to it immediately: your room was on the third floor. Seeing Peter sitting on the bench of a tree, you gasped in shock. You opened the window right away, praying for him to stay still.
"Are you out of your mind?" You whispered in horror, holding out your hand to him. "What are you doing there?!"
He smiled at you like nothing was happening, taking your arm and crawling towards your window. In the next moment he was already inside your room, grinning like a kid and shutting the window behind himself. You furrowed your brows, your heart racing. Peter was insane!
"What if you slipped?" You asked him furiously. "Are you mad? Do you want to die?!"
"No, but you wouldn't let me in your room unless I came in the window." He admitted carelessly and smiled, reaching out to you and enveloping you in a hug. "I'm glad you don't want me to fall."
"You're out of your mind, brother." You grunted, trying to push him away, but his grip was only becoming stronger. "What are you doing? Let me go, please."
"But I want a hug from you. Is it so bad?"
You clenched your teeth, watching him angrily. "You just made my mom scream at me for that stupid sock. You think you deserve a hug?"
"I only did it because you're stubborn. It's your fault I had come to this, Y/N." His sickly sweet smile made you nauseated as you put your hands on his chest in attempt to keep him away. "Come on, why have you been acting so cold? I just want to be a part of your family."
"Are you serious?"
Your eyes could burn a hole in his face as you stared at him, getting more and more angry with his behaviour and trying to blame you for his own actions.
"This isn't like it should be in a family, Peter. We're siblings now. Siblings don't do it... l-like that." You felt your face growing hot as you became deeply embarrassed, knowing how your words could be interpreted.
"But we're not siblings, are we?" He tilted his head to the side, narrowing his dark eyes at you and smiling widely.
You growled in irritation, still unable to get rid of him holding you like a doll in his hands.
"If you don't want me to be your sister, what family are you talking about, then?"
"We'll, it's not the only family I can have with you, right?"
You stilled, unsure you understood what Peter meant as he chuckled with content, watching you getting more and more confused while he gently caressed your back. What other family he could possibly mean?
It took you a few seconds to realize he was talking about marriage between you two.
Your eyes popped out of its sockets. Was he fucking serious? That kind of family? No, he should have been out of his mind completely. He definitely had to see a psychiatrist or something!
"You're joking, aren't you?" You muttered, shocked. "You can't be serious!"
"But I am, sister." Peter's sweet smile was slowly turning sinister as he leaned closer to you, dropping a kiss to your temple as you shivered against him, wanting nothing but get away. "And you better stop with that silly attitude of yours if you don't want me to get real angry."
"And what are you going to do if I don't? What if I will tell everyone about this?"
He smirked, touching your forehead with his and closing his eyes for a second.
"I see you still don't understand." Peter whispered to you, watching you getting more and more nervous. “I will strip away all that you know, all that you love, until you have no one but me.”
___________
Tags: @finleyjayne @alexakeyloveloki   ​@helenaeisenhower @villanellevi @hurricanerin ​@void-hoechlin @abyssaint @heeeyitskay @chris-evans-indian-fanfic @rosalynshields @brattycherubwrites @sllooney @angrythingstarlight
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