My darling Niece wants to be Dolores for her school’s Book week! (I’m not sure they do this outside Australia), It’s a themed event to encourage reading, and on the last day all the kids dress up in costumes as various characters from books (characters from comics, TV, and movies all count too because 1. most popular medias generally have book tie in’s for kids and 2. They’re kids, the point is to have fun!) and walk in a small parade for all the parents and teachers to coo and awe over~

It was a particular favourite of mine growing up, I've made a Minecraft Steve head, a Harry Potter wand and styled an Elsa wig for their previous years, but this year I’m going hard! I really enjoyed Encanto myself and I couldn’t be more delighted by her choice in character this year, so Unkie Kens pulling out all the stops and I'm teaching myself how to make the whole thing from scratch! and yah’ll get to watch me fumble and stumble my way through it ╰(*°▽°*)╯

There’s a moment that every child who aspires to movie stardom dreams about. They practise it in front of the mirror: graciously thanking their parents, their first drama teacher, their favourite hamster; smiling; waving; trying valiantly to cry. No, it’s not an Oscar’s acceptance speech – at least, not anymore; it’s the moment that super-producer Kevin Feige offers you his hand across a conference table and tells you you’ve landed a Marvel movie.

Yesterday came the first reports that Olivia Colman is in talks to slip into full-body lycra and join the MCU, via the studio’s next small-screen series Secret Invasion. The news follows a recent clutch of arrivals of actresses of a similar age and calibre to Colman to other Marvel projects, including Kathryn Hahn’s show-stealing turn in WandaVision, and Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ surprise appearance in The Falcon and the Winter Soldier.

Such casting choices may once have sounded insane. Why would the woman who just two years ago won an Academy Award for her grief-stricken, crumbling performance as Queen Anne in The Favourite, and who is up for another one this weekend for The Father, choose to submerge her pristine brand as the reigning monarch of British acting, both on-screen and off-, in a barrel of brightly-coloured, pop-sountracked, quippy-scripted comic bookery?

Secret Invasion sounds even more deranged than the average Marvel project: it will likely focus on the race of green, reptilian aliens called Skrulls (Ben Mendelsohn will reprise his role as Skrull commander Talos from Captain Marvel), as they invade earth by shapeshifting to imitate superheroes. Colman as an alien reptile? It’s hard to think of a more unlikely piece of casting since Judi Dench dressed up in a catsuit.

But over the last decade, a foundational piece of Marvel’s strategy has been signing-on not just fresh-faced stars like Chris Evans and Tom Holland, but some of the world’s most serious performers: inde darlings (Mark Ruffalo, Tilda Swinton, Brie Larson), BBC-drama-grown Brits (Tom Hiddleston, Benedict Cumberbatch) and awards-laden  powerhouses (Annette Bening, Scarlett Johansson, and even Anthony Hopkins, Colman’s co-star in The Father, who is also up for an Oscar) have all rocked up in the MCU. Much as the Harry Potter franchise once was, the films have become a who’s who of Oscar after-party invite lists.

So why would the great and good of Hollywood acting willingly attach themselves to a franchise that one of the greatest directors of all time not so long ago declared to bear a greater resemblance to theme park rides than cinema? Marvel films are delightful but they are also frequently silly (inevitably, in the transition from cartoon comic book drawings to full-sized, three-dimensional adults leaping around on-camera dressed in skin-tight lycra suits and capes, some space for ridicule is opened up).

The studio is fully aware of this, which is why these films are comedies, but that does not make them any more obvious as vehicles for artists interested in rendering psychological depth on-screen. In 2012, Kiwi wunderkind director Taika Watiti told Interview magazine that he was suspicious of the way feature films can often “turn into commodities”. Yet five years later, his own Marvel movie, Thor: Ragnarok, hit cinemas.

The financial incentives to any actor are obvious and no doubt play a part but there is something even more valuable to someone like Benedict Cumberbatch – not exactly strapped-for-cash following Sherlock, The Imitation Game, and The Hobbit films – inextricably wound-up with those mega pay packages. That something is audience size. Avengers: Endgame, the highest-grossing film of all time until Avatar’s re-release in China in March last year, took $357 million at the domestic box office on its opening weekend.

In America, the average price of a cinema ticket that year was about $9  – that means, by the roughest of calculations, that within 48 hours of the film’s release, 12% of the population, or some 40 million people, had seen the film. An actress like Colman has not exactly been confined to niche audiences – The Crown is not a small show – but even so, the prospect of such unparalleled exposure must be seductive.

The dream of a Marvel movie has not replaced the dream of an Oscar – it all but guarantees it. A symbiotic relationship is emerging between the franchise and the Academy, as the popular reach of one feeds and is elevated by the prestige of the other. There is no better example of this than the tragically-curtailed career of the late Chadwick Boseman.

From a handful of critically-lauded but quietly received biopics (42, Get on Up), he was propelled overnight to global stardom by his MCU roles as Black Panther, Marvel’s first black superhero, culminating in the Black Panther film in 2018. Now, just months after his death from cancer, he is a shoo-in to win a Best Actor award this week for his role in Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom. The opposite of a Marvel film in almost every sense – it’s claustrophobic, literary (it’s based on an August Wilson play), and tragic – it was Black Panther nonetheless that secured him the part.

This give-and-take between superhero flicks and prestige dramas extends beyond actors: Watiti, who has just wrapped shooting on another Thor film, was nominated for an Oscar in 2019 for his German Resistance drama Jojo Rabbit, while Chloé Zhao, who is sure to win Best Director this weekend for Nomadland, has just wrapped her own Marvel movie, Eternals, which is slated for release in November.

Kathryn Hahn, meanwhile, was brought into WandaVision by director Matt Shakman, better known for directing prestige shows like Mad Men and Succession. His vision, in collaboration with the writer Jac Schaeffer, led to a formally wildly innovative show, providing the opportunity for Hahn and the show’s pair of stars Elizabeth Olsen and Paul Bettany – both outstanding actors – to flex their comic and creative muscles. Such starpower behind the camera is itself an attraction for actors of Colman’s calibre, and while there is as yet no word on who will direct Secret Invasion, there are many exciting possible names in the mix.

A few powerhouse industry figures were instrumental in fostering this mutually-beneficial relationship. The first was Robert Downey Jr, the original posterboy of the franchise. When he agreed to star in the first film, 2008’s Iron Man, it was a huge gamble – director Jon Favreau had to battle the studio to accept him – as he emerged from a wilderness decade marred by drug addiction, but it was also a huge coup. Downey Jr had just been nominated for an Oscar for Ben Stiller’s comedy Tropic Thunder and had recently starred in David Fincher’s instant cult-classic Zodiac; his personal reputation may have been in tatters, but as a serious actor, he brought chops.

His Iron Man would become the emotional and dramatic heart of the franchise over its next three phases. Kenneth Branagh, who directed the 2011 film Thor, also bridged the gap between the big flashy studio and his own thespy circle: he brought his protégé Tom Hiddleston, who at that point was best known for his British TV and theatre work, onboard to play Loki, a decision that Feige apparently described as the most important the studio would ever make. Hiddleston capitalised on rather than abandoned his roots: he approached the character like “a comic book version of Edmund in King Lear, but nastier.” It paid off: Hiddleston is a global superstar, frequently touted as the next James Bond, and his dedicated Loki spin-off show is the Marvel TV release of the summer.

Of course, there’s one thing that Marvel offers its actors that money simply can’t buy: a bit of fun. “If my actors aren’t having a good time on set, then I’m doing something wrong,” Waititi told Polygon in 2016. Reflecting on her playfully heightened performance in the early episodes of WandaVision in a recent interview with the New York Times, Hahn said that her husband said her performance had reminded him of her younger self in her college days. “I haven’t seen that part of you in so long – just you, hamboning it,” he told her. Colman, who is by all accounts is a mischievous on a film set, may simply want to bust out of those period costumes, slip into a bodysuit, and have a good time.

Haikyuu boys when you get injured playing your sport pt.2

Oikawa, Tsukishima, Tendo, Asahi, Kageyama

Summary: The first one was really fun to write, so here is part 2! This is some others and how I think they’d react when you get hurt during sport!

Warnings: Explicit mention of blood and open wounds

A/N: I’d like to thank everyone for over 100 followers! Yes, I know that doesn’t seem like many but it’s a big deal to me, so thank you!! I also appreciate the patience with my messed up writing schedule <3 ...Tendo’s got really long and Kageyama’s got a little angsty whoops 

Oikawa:

As one who suffers from a sport injury himself, Oikawa is constantly aware of the possibility

Reminds you before every game of hockey to stay safe

His tone may be lighthearted when he says it, but he’s very serious

He knows the ins and outs of stretching and the recovery process for injuries

Usually, he doesn’t come to your games, mostly because he’s busy or he's afraid of getting recognised

When you get home or see him next, he’d ask out the game and listen with excitement and interest

He definitely does research on the game too

This time, he was so glad he went

To avoid being recognised, he wore a cap and sunglasses, standing at the back of the spectators

His height allowed him to easily watch you from the crowd

You were really hyped for the game, knowing your opponents were going to be tough

Unfortunately, your team was struggling with the game

The other team was scoring goal after goal, and you couldn’t keep up

You ran back to defend the goal, in the way for an approaching player

They were ready to score, and you were ready to dive in

The urgency and pressure of the situation got to your head, and you ran towards them with anger

You let out a cry, charging towards the hockey ball

In the back of your mind, you knew Oikawa wouldn’t be impressed with how you lost your patience

And you were right

He treaded closer to the game, his eyebrows furrowed and his arms crossed

“Y/N... Don’t get ahead of yourself”

He whispered, wishing you could hear him

Your opponent placed the ball in position to swing for goal

But you had gotten too far ahead of yourself

They swung their hockey stick

Your ankle was in the way

Usually, you wouldn’t be too bothered, bruises littering your ankle for a week after

This time, the stick was made of aluminium

The impact and pain that shot through your ankle brought you to the ground

Pain unbearable, you dropped your own stick and held your food

“Ow, ow, ow”

You mumbled sloppily, tears, saliva, and snot dribbling over your lips

You wanted to stand up and keep playing but the pain continued like an unforgiving clamp tightening on your ankle

Suddenly aware of how you look, you wiped your mouth from the fluids

You heard a whistle blow, but the pain caused for stars to dance in your vision

“Y/N-chan, eyes up here”

The stars from your eyes cleared, the sight of your boyfriend crouching next to you on the field shining through

You couldn’t form words, not that they would have helped

He immediately moved to take your shoe off, seeing how it had already started to swell 

It blew up like a balloon before your very eyes

“I’ll carry you”

Oikawa whispered, sliding an arm around your back and the other securely under your knees

Lifting you up, he escorted you off the field

He didn’t let you ride in the ambulance your coach called by yourself, holding your hand the whole way

It was definitely a bad break, being a pain through the recovery process as you could hardly apply any pressure on the foot

You were in a cast, and Oikawa wrote a lovey-dovey message on it that took up half the space

Once you were out of it Oikawa knew all the right physiological stretches in order to get you back on your feet to play again

He did a great job taking care of you, and you couldn't thank him more

Tsukishima:

Doesn’t effect your relationship that you were into swimming as that was not why he loved you

That doesn’t mean he doesn’t like how you are training so hard for it

It’s the passion and love for swimming that he wishes he had for volleyball

To be honest, Tsukishima wouldn’t be worried about you getting hurt

He thinks swimming is not a very hazardous sport

Which is fairly true, so you don’t get injured during a specific race or anything

Your injury shows up slowly over time

Originally you shook it off, expecting that the soreness in your shoulders was just your muscles tired after a long two hours of lap after lap

However, it started getting worse, and you began to tell Tsukishima your concerns

He’d say something like, “Then just take your time at training. I can’t do anything about it. What did you expect me to say?”

Let’s be real, he’s kind of worried

Especially as he began to notice how you would wince after taking your bag off your shoulders, or if you reached up to the top shelf

The day he realised that you needed to get them checked out was when you had walked to his place after training

The whole walk there the straps of your bag felt a lot heavier

Your shoulders hurt, but the left was the worst one by fair

Shifting the weight of your bag to your right shoulder, you gave the left a rest

Soon enough you knocked on Tsukishima’s door and he opened quickly after

You dropped your bag inside the door and rubbed your shoulder

“Oi, Y/N, are you okay?”

Tsukishima asked, the way your sighed making his eyebrows furrow ever so slightly

“Yeah, but my shoulder is pretty bad”

You tell him, hoping that he’ll show some sympathy

He scooped up your bag and called for you to follow him to the couch

He left you there, leaving momentarily to drop your bag with your wet swimmers into the laundry

Soon, he plopped down on the couch beside you and turned on the tv

Carefully, he pulled you onto his lap and you instinctively dropped your head onto his shoulder

Instead of huffing slightly like he usually did, you pushed you forward 

“No, sit towards my knees”

You obeyed him, and he hovered his fingers over your shoulders

Smiling once you realised what he was going to do, you let him work his nibble fingers into your shoulders

He stopped if you whined, asking where to go from there

It really helped, you never realised how good Tsukishima was with his fingers (no... not like that)

You were putty in his hands, completely relaxed as you watched the tv 

Once you felt the tension was mostly gone, Tsukishima scooted out from underneath you to book a scan

When you had it, you discovered you had Bursitis 

(A/N: I have this in my shoulder and it sucks)

This required for lots of rest, icing, and careful exercise

You were off swimming for almost three months before Tsukishima was convinced that you could handle tending to it afterwards

When you got back to swimming, you wore a sling on the worst days and Tsukishima carried your bag for you

He raised his hand in class if you needed to ask a question, and made sure you never had to overexert your left arm

His favourite thing to do was tease you even more about having to get him to get stuff off the top shelves

You were shorter than him, but now you need him even more

When you use your condition as a counterargument he always says “aww, poor baby Y/N”

No doubt, he does certainly cared for you, but get ready for a long road ahead for the both of you

Tendo:

You’re a figure skater! And how he loves to watch you skate!

He gets so excited, you have no idea

Whether you are in a competition, or if you are just practicing, he gets so giddy and proud while watching you glide across the ice

Thinks you look so good in the costumes, no matter your body type 

If you were to have to travel internationally for a competition, you bet he’d be coming with you

Tendo does get into trouble when he disturbs your practise at the rink

But you always invite him to watch any time, not caring what your coach thought

Super supportive of you, it’s not funny

However, what is funny is that he has no idea all the technical terms or how the point system works

So, when he watches you during a comp, he’ll greet you off the ice with:

“BABE, THAT FANCY THING YOU DID WITH YOUR ARMS AFTER YOU LANDED FROM THE SPINNING-TOP-JUMPY-THING YOU DID WAS SO SEXY! YOU’VE GOT TO WIN! YOU LOOKED SO GOOD, MY PARADISE”

You double over in laughter every time he says something like that

You only just manage out a “Thank you, Tori” before you’re ushered off to get your score

The score you were appointed is half decent, placing you in third place

When you go to find Tendo so you can sit with him while watching the rest of the skaters, he appalled

“PARADISE, YOU DESERVED MUCH BETTER THAN THAT! I’D HAVE GIVEN YOU A 634.53!!”

“Satori, that’s basically impossible for a short program”

“I DON’T CARE BECAUSE IT IS WHAT YOU DESERVE”

It’s kind of embarrassing, in a large rink of people, for him to be yelling like that

But... it’s all because he thinks you are incredibly talented

Which is very sweet

Anyways, you injure yourself at practice 

Tendo had just got of his volleyball practice at Shiratorizawa and decided to swing by the rink

You were staying in late, your coach and the rest of the skaters had gone home, so it was just you and a few workers at the rink

Tendo burst in, the goofy grin on his face that cases his eyes to be forced shut by the adorable purity of it

You were focusing on a quadruple axel that you hadn’t perfected when he arrived

“Good evening, paradise! How are you-”

You had been halfway through the jump when you peeled your eyes open

Immediately happy to see him, you smiled brightly

But, your excitement cost you the landing

You slipped, landing harshly onto the ice on your hip with a thud, the water soaking into your tights

“Y/N!”

Tendo dropped his bags, running and sliding his lanky body across the ice on his knees to where you had sprawled out

There was certainly going to be really bad bruise there, you could tell

But the coolness of the ice made your hip numb to the pain

“Are you okay? I scared you, didn’t I?”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the way Tendo was leaning over you, now having soaked knees too

“Yeah, you did”

“Let’s take you home and have a nice warm shower, hey?”

You agreed, leading him off the ice with both of your hands in his, because the psycho had run onto the ice with no skates on

The two of you walked home, the whole time you noticing the numbness leaving your hip

While having your shower, you checked your hip to find a dark purple bruise the size of your hand, raw to the touch

You took a shower, afterwards putting on some underwear and one of your boyfriend’s large shirts

Leaving your room, you enter the living room find Tendo sprawled on the couch

He made a comment about how good you look, leaving you giggling

You grabbed an icepack from the freezer and a tea towel to wrap it in

Laying on top of Tendo, you rolled on your side to have your bruised hip facing the ceiling

“Whatcha got there?”

Tendo asked

You flashed the icepack in front of his face, before quickly wrapping it up

Pulling the oversized shirt over your hip, you exposed the bruise to your boyfriend

“This is what you did to me, you scary man”

You joke, poking him in the cheek

The colour drained from his face in a split second, and he let out a cry of agony

“No! I’m so sorry! How can I make you feel better?”

He leaned over you, pressing scattered kisses over the bruise and mumbling sorry between each one

You knew he was trying to be feathery with his kisses, but the slightest pressure hurt

So, you pushed his head away

“Ow, Tori, that hurts. You can hold the ice for me”

He does as he’s told and you thank him, kindly

He has eagle eyes on you constantly after that, acting like your personal bodyguard

Makes sure he’s always on the side that is bruised at school, so that no one can bump it

Lines your bed with pillows, as to not accidentally bump it on the wall

Stops you from walking if you don’t have to, in which you tell him he’s fine

You try reassuring him by saying that it could have been worse, but that makes him even more wary when you skate knowing that worse could happen to you

Asahi:

He’s adorable, constantly being supportive during your games of netball

Out of everyone, he’s the most likely to be worried about possible injury

Even though it’s a fairly safer sport, Asahi makes sure that you are reminded of every possible scenario that he had made up in his head before a game

You’d shut him up with a kiss to the lips, but he’ll be trembling when you walk away

Understands the game, not needing much help with keeping up with points or rules

He’ll calm down eventually while watching you play, focusing on silently praising you

Secretly a fan of the uniform, don’t tell anyone - he’d be so embarrassed

Doesn’t come to practice often because of the clashes with his volleyball training

When you got injured during a game, thank goodness Nishinoya had joined him to cheer you on

The energy Nishinoya brought to the sidelines motivated Asahi to cheer more too

Usually, you’d wave to him after getting a point and he’d wave back

But you could actually hear him because of Noya

You had in the back of your head to thank him for bringing him out of his shell

Have of the reason he never went to your practice because he was scared the other players would have thought he was some creepy middle-aged man there to stare at them in their uniforms

That’s why he always came to your games without fail, to make up for it and because he felt safer from a distance

However, Nishinoya had dragged him to the front, which he was hesitant about at first

But when he saw how excited you were to see him so close made him smile 

You were in perfect position to receive the ball in order to shoot

Your teammates passed back and forth, approaching you slowly

“I’m free! Guys!”

You gained their attention, and they sent the ball your way

You caught it and immediately shot for the goal while the opponents were distracted

“Come on, Y/N!” 

Both Nishinoya and Asahi shouted, Noya obviously the loudest

The first shot missed, but you quickly caught it and shot again

This time, the ball landed through the hoop and the whistle blown to confirm that it was a point 

You could hear Asahi and Nishinoya celebrating on the sidelines

Pumping your fists in the air, you brushed your forearm against the goal post

A nail had been sticking out of it, slicing through your skin

You immediately hissed, the pain stinging dramatically

You grab your arm, searching to find a massive gash down the length of your forearm

Blood poured from the wound and you called your coach

They immediately brought you off once they saw the red liquid

Asahi was worried, slipping around to where you were holding a towel to your arm

Hissing in pain, you found Asahi approaching

“Y-Y/N, what happened?”

He could see the pain laced into your face, shaking nervously

You wanted to hide it, afraid of how he would react

Carefully, you removed the damp cloth from the wound with a hiss as the air hit the tenderness

“I’m gonna need stitches”

You hissed through your teeth, turning to show Asahi

By then Nishinoya had arrived by Asahi, and at the perfect time

One look at the way your arm had been split open with blood gushing from the open wound...

And Asahi had fainted

Luckily Nishinoya was there to catch him and lower him to the ground

Now you were more worried for Asahi than yourself, to be honest

With Asahi out of commission, your coach had to take you to get you almost twenty stitches

Nishinoya stayed back to make sure Asahi woke up safely, and when he did, he was anxiously asking where you were and how you were

Asahi dropped into your place after finding out you were out of hospital, pulling you into a hug

Of course you made sure he was okay after his episode too

Constant tender touches while you healed, and soft kisses over the patch on your arm

He treated you like an absolute princess, especially after Nishinoya had scared him again by saying “I think she’ll need to get it amputated” right after he woke up

Fainted again when he went with you to get the stitches removed

Kageyama:

This boy does not get rugby at all

He tries, because he’s smart enough to pick it up if he wanted to

But, he’s more impressed with sports that involve more ‘thinking and skill’

What is impressive to him, however, is how fit and strong you are

Even though he is still taller than you, he almost feels like you are the bigger person in the relationship with the muscle you have

Likes being small spoon with your figure

Silently admires your athletic ability, and thinks you are really cool whenever you make a massive run down the field

Kageyama likes to watch when you win

He gets so blushy and excited when you bound into his arms after a good game 

Unfortunately, he’s very busy with volleyball, unable to make many training sessions or games

He tries his hardest to be at your training grounds in time to walk home with you

He tries to keep his Saturday’s free to be with you or at your games

Recently, he had been even more busy, and this week he couldn’t make it too 

This team had been tough, with a lot of bigger players 

You were sort of struggling to break past them, unable to score any tries

All you remember was receiving the ball, trying to break through the wall they had created

You had run headfirst into the players, and the next thing you knew...

You woke up in hospital

Your head was wrapped up, and it thumped painfully

Trying to sit up hurt your head, so you laid back down

With how fuzzy your head was, you failed to notice Kageyama sitting in the corner with a carton of milk

He had been anxiously twiddling his thumbs while emptying carton after carton

When your eyes opened, he shot up, hurrying to your bedside

You finally noticed him, smiling softly at the pout on his lips and the shine of glossiness in his eyes

“Tobio...”

Even speaking hurt your head

“Don’t speak if it hurts”

Kageyama basically read your mind, taking your hand in his and placing your open palm on his cheek

“You’re such a dumbass, scaring me like that”

He rested his head on the bed next to you on the bed

You glided your thumb over his cheek, watching as the pout on his lips began to tremble slightly

Whining slightly in order to awe at him, you whispered

“I’m sorry...”

“Why did it happen the one game I can’t make it... damn it... I should have been there”

You shifted your head, ignoring the pain, in order to get a better view of him

His dark blue eyed were sparkling with tears, and you mumbled

“No... baby...”

Kageyama ignored you, turning to press his face into the white sheet on your thighs, blinking back his tears

“I was scared...”

He mumbled in a cracked voice into your thigh

You took his face in your hands and carefully pulled him towards your face

Giving him a kiss to his nose, you let him lay his head on your chest

“Don’t cry... I’m here”

You croaked, threading your fingers through his raven hair

The recovery process was long and hard, having received severe head trauma

You were in hospital for another day after you woke up for tests and to make sure you could stand without fainting

Kageyama stayed with you the entire time, only leaving when your parents insisted he get some sleep

After this, your parents were certain you could marry him, not kidding

He treated you like glass whenever he saw you, especially when you took the time off school

He would accidentally yell at you if he saw you up and about, but immediately took it back and apologised 

Poor Hinata got all of Kageyama’s pent up anger about everything, being unable to yell at you

When you return to school, he’s like your shadow, following you around and making sure you’re drinking enough water

Reassure him that it wasn’t his fault and that you’re not going anywhere

“But he’s Iron Man...”  Chris Evans X Reader

Overview: Your kids are dressing up as Superhero’s for school and Chris is surprised when someone is missing.....

A/N  New Chris guys!! Another request, I'm still working through the list don't worry but feel free to keep sending me requests for anything you want. Hope you guys enjoy this one thank you for all the support :) 

like and Reblog!

Word-count:1,100 

“Kids!” You yelled up the stairs “You better be down here in two minutes or I’m eating your breakfasts.” 

There was a thud and a yell, but then a small “we’re coming!” Could be heard. The baby squished into his high chair crowed in response. You turned thinking he wanted something, but he was too occupied with squishing toast with his hands. 

“Honey, can you make sure that Eli actually eats that? I cant keep feeding him animal biscuits five times a day.” Chris looked up from the book he was reading, eyes slightly dazed, then turned and smiled at his son. With one hand he gently unhooked his sons grubby fingers and wiggled the toast strip in front of his mouth “Come on little man.” Eli scrunched his nose in protest, but a little more coaxing from his Dad caused him to giggle and start eating. Chris’s eyes crinkled with pleasure. 

You rewarded Chris with a large cup of coffee and a brief stroke through his messy hair. He leant into the touch like a cat, humming slightly, then jerked his head slightly. “I’m too sleep deprived right now for that.” 

“i know how you feel. ” You crouched by your youngest child and peppered kisses all over his cheek, causing Eli to squeal and blow spit bubbles. “It’s worth it though,” you cooed. “KIDS! YOU BETTER BE READY!”

“So today is superhero day?” Chris said “At least this time you don’t have to worry about last minute costumes.” He paused and then smiled widely “Are one of them dressed up as me?”

“um-“

“DADDDD! WE’RE READY!”

Chris dropped the paper on the table and shifted his seat so he and Eli were facing the hallway. “alright, let me see your costumes.” 

On that cue there was a thundering of feet and the twins came skidding into the kitchen. They stopped and posed, hands on hips and grinning with glee. “What do you think Dad?” Joni giggled cheekily. 

Chris looked, took a second, then his face slacked in horror. “Why is Harry dressed as Iron man?” 

Harry pulled the plastic mask off his face to reveal a scrunched up look of humour “Because Iron Man is the best!” He thrust his arm out, pew pewing right at Chris’ chest. Eli gurgled happily. You fought back a smile and went back to slicing up banana “We watched the first Iron Man so he could practise.” 

“But-but” He seemed to be buffering “he’s not captain America.” 

“Captain America sucks.” 

“you take that back young man,” Chris swooped and hoisted his eldest up over his broad shoulder, a high pitched squeal of terrified glee. “Try and fight your way out of this now.” 

“Robert could,” you joked. 

“i would throw Eli’s soggy toast at you but I’ve been banned doing that In front of the kids,” Chris pointed a finger warningly in your direction. “And stop wriggling you’re tickling me,” he spoke over his shoulder, his voice edged with laughter as he squirmed under his sons touch. Harry continued to poke at his Dad’s waist until Chris had to drop him, harry running over to play with Eli instead. 

“Hey Dad,” Joni ran around the table so Chris could have a better look at her costume “What do you think of mine?”

“You look great,” Chris smiled at his daughter’ elaborate doctor strange costume, biro facial hair included “but wouldn’t you want to dress like Daddy? Captain America was the first avenger.”

“Technically Captain marvel was the first avenger,” you pointed out. Chris Shot you look of betrayal.  “Joni you’d look so good.”

“Are you saying I don’t look good now?” Joni’s eyes went wide, and her voice grew small. You and Chris caught eyes over her head and you shook your head in a don’t you dare warning. Chris turned back to his daughter and pulled her into his side, rubbing her arm as if she was cold. 

“you look amazing sweetheart.”He pulled her up onto his lap and quickly kissed her forehead “I love the beard. I should teach you how to shave.” He pretended to shave Joni’s chin and that caused her to giggle lightly, mirroring him by running her hand all over the light stubble on his Jawline. You mouthed thank you and Chris winked quickly, grinning. The twins started clambering for their food and for a moment the conversation was diverted to cereal choices and contents of sandwiches. Harry kept picking up the orange juice and trying to make it explode, although this ended with Eli’s hair matting with juice. 

It seems as if Chris had led it go. “Harry can you pass-“

 “-How about if I give you one of the real shields?”

“Chris!”

“Only one of the small ones!” He reassured. 

“Our son is 6 there’s no way he’s going to be able to carry your shield around.” 

“But he’s dressed as IRON MAN!” 

“And he worked all week on his costume so be nice.”

“And what about Joni? Doctor Strange isn’t even that good. OW!” Chris turned to his smirking daughter “Did you just throw a banana at me?” 

‘Kids, go get your shoes on, we’re going to be late.” 

“I need to do something before we go,” Chris was unclipping Eli from his highchair, pressing him close to his chest and he hurried out of the kitchen.

“Chris?” You called “what are you doing with my son?” 

“I’LL BE ONE MINUTE!” He yelled running up the stairs. You bundled kids in coats and bags, did a last minute fix of Joni’s costume, took photos to tease them in the future years, and we’re just about to buckle them up in the car when Chris came running back. His eyes were gleaming as he proudly held his son out like he was presenting him on top of pride rock. 

“You didn’t.” 

“Yes. I. Did.” Eli squirmed with joy, smacking his hand against the mini captain America helmet that has been  rammed onto his head.  He was so chunky with the armour Chris was struggling to clip his seat belt in. “You had to give him a shield too?” You smirked. 

“What? He has to look the part.”

“He just threw it at his sister.”

“He’s really committing to the role!” 

You wrapped your arms around his chest and kissed him briefly “You’re an idiot.”

Chris rubbed his chin softly against your head for a moment, blocking out the chattering of children for a split second and being themselves, not just the parents. ‘i love you too.” 

“DAD! DAD ELI JUST THREW UP ON MY COSTUME!” Harry’s furious shriek broke the moment. 

Chris chuckled with pride as you turned to clean the mess up. “Thats my boy.” 

For that au ask meme, how about an MCU Spiderman where his love interest is Ned or Flash?

contains spoilers for far from home.

-

1.

so peter’s not going to make this sappy, all right? okay, so maybe he died and lost five years of his life, and maybe the weeks since the final battle against thanos were spent feeling numb and disconcertingly like peter didn’t quite fit right in his own body anymore, and maybe he sees mr stark, half-burned and crumbled at the foot of an alien ship, dying in his nightmares every night. maybe seeing ned for the first time after all of this, hugging him, shedding a few tears into his sweatshirt that still smelled like lemony laundry detergent, was when peter felt like something clicked together in his head after a long time and the rest of the world slid into clarity.

but peter’s not going to say any of that, because a) embarrassing, and b) he’s so not ready to talk about any of it with any degree of calm yet. 

what he is going to do is march right up to ned and ask him out. he’s got two tickets to boba fett: out of the sarlacc pit, and a reservation at the fanciest chinese fast food place he can afford. (okay, so maybe it’s not a reservation so much as begging mike wu to hold a place for him in the corner-most booth around eight-ish in exchange for a promise to tutor him in calculus.) and if ned doesn’t really feel the same way peter does, then... that’s okay. they would still be friends, and to just know and love and be with ned would be enough for peter for a lifetime.

... god, he’s getting sappy again.

he finds ned at his locker, rooting around for a book. he flashes a brilliant smile at peter as he approaches, and if peter’s heart starts pounding in his ears like a drum, it’s only because of his enhanced senses, okay? he’s going to play this cool, and smooth, and--

“so i heard they were still making star wars movies.” 

(what. what. that’s a terrible opener.)

ned shakes his head. “yeah, tell me about it. you’d think every one of the people who actually knew how to make a good star wars movie got Blipped together. what’s there now? a boba fett trilogy? please.”

peter’s brain starts throwing up flashing lights and panic alarms at the derision in ned’s voice. “um... you sure? i mean, boba fett’s pretty badass, man.”

ned stares at him for a long moment. “dude. we’re long overdue for an original trilogy rewatch. i’m coming over to your place tonight. did you know that they now sell dvd copies of those movies to look like original vhs tapes? the world’s insane.”

“yeah,” peter says morosely. “just insane.”

to be honest, it isn’t the end of the world. they end up spending the evening cuddled on the couch, eating takeaway tacos and making increasingly off-colour jokes about ewoks. scratch that, ‘end of the world’ is too low a bar to clear; peter was there when the world ended, and it sucked. being with ned makes him feel like he did the first time he swung off a building as spider-man: giddy and excited and filled with the rock-solid, entirely warm realisation that this is exactly where he’s meant to be.

2.

peter doesn’t exactly get cold feet after that, but he doesn’t feel ready to try pushing his relationship with ned to another level again. besides, these days they spend almost every evening together, whether it’s chilling, or doing homework, or for spider-man stuff. 

he’s started swinging in the neighbourhood again, working his way up from stopping petty crime and promoting aunt may’s homeless charity. the first time he put on the suit and heard karen’s voice, he had a panic attack and almost threw up. since then, ned offered to not just disable karen, but to replace her as his man in the chair as often as he can. and to be honest, swinging through the neighbourhood, stopping crime, with ned’s voice in his ear all the while? dream come true.

(and the post-mission exhausted cuddling? just another perk.)

he doesn’t know how long they would’ve gone on like this if mj didn’t confront him out of the blue. which she does. because she’s mj.

3.

she tells him one evening after school, uncharacteristically flustered: “i know you’re spider-man.”

okay, peter, he thinks. this is it. this is what you practised for everyday in front of the mirror. don’t blow this.

“me?!” he exclaims. he laughs, and it sounds rusty and high-pitched. great, peter, you are blowing this. “have you seen me? i can’t shoo--i’m not, i mean. i can’t be spider-man.”

she raises an unimpressed eyebrow at him. “i followed you and ned on one of your dates. i saw you change into that costume and swing off a sixty-story building, peter. i mean,” she shrugs, “it was obvious before that, but i was only maybe 67% sure--”

“wait,” peter says. his heart’s pounding again. ‘you think ned and i are... dating?”

mj rolls her eyes at him. “come on. that’s way more obvious than the spider-man thing, and that’s saying something.”

peter swallows against his suddenly dry mouth. “so, ned--”

“--has been crushing on you since i can remember. wait, you didn’t--peter, are you okay?”

“yeah. yeah yeah yeah.” peter lets out a breath through pursed lips, bounces on the balls of his feet, feeling something impossibly light and warm fill him. “i mean, being spider-man is one thing, but knowing that ned--”

“so you are spider-man.”

“yes. shit. no! i didn’t say that. you did not hear me say that. mj? mj. MJ--”

4.

they’re on a class trip at a museum, crowded around a painting and bored out of their minds, when peter crosses his hands behind his back. with one hand, he searches out ned’s hand, teases it open, and slips his fingers in. barely a second later, ned holds his hand back, and squeezes.

peter grins so hard and for so long that it unnerves mr harrington into abruptly stopping his lecture and almost walk right into a suit of armour.

5.

peter decides that holding hands with ned has gone right to the top of his list of ‘best feelings in the world’. they do it all the time: on the bus. in school. before peter goes on patrol. after patrol. walking home. may thinks it’s the cutest thing, and ned’s blush at that makes peter’s stomach flutter.

they even go on that not-a-date that peter had planned not so long ago. peter registers nothing that’s showing on screen after ned raises their joined hands to his lips and gives peter’s fingers a quick kiss. it’s all peter can do not to fucking jump up and walk on the ceiling--

“this is surprisingly nice,” ned whispers in his ear halfway through the movie. 

peter squeaks in return.

6.

for the longest time, they don’t really have a name for what they’re sharing, and peter doesn’t want to disrupt a good thing by putting a name to it. and from the looks of it, neither does ned.

 it isn’t until peter returns from a particularly difficult patrol, sore and exhausted, that ned plants a quick, awkward kiss on the corner of peter’s mouth while pulling out of a bear hug. 

peter blinks.

“dude,” ned says. “i really, really like you, so maybe don’t scare me again by knocking yourself out on a lamp-post?”

“yeah,” peter says, a little breathlessly, and kisses him back.

-

( send me an au and i’ll give you 5+ headcanons about it! )

This time nine years ago, five teenage boys’ dreams were in tatters after being rejected from the X Factor .

But determined not to let a good-looking gang go to waste, show boss Simon Cowell and his genius decided to put solo hopefuls Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson together.

It took the lads just five minutes to agree to his plan and have another crack at the competition - this time in the groups category.

They would go on to be one of the most successful boybands of the century, selling out stadiums and dominating the charts for five years before splitting in an explosion of bitterness and animosity.

But with no experience of harmonies, group singing or even each other, even then Liam wondered what they were really getting into.

“We had seen each other at Bootcamp and got on well, and Niall and I had shared a room. But we were competition then, and at the back of the minds we knew were against each other,” Liam would later recall.

“So it was strange when we were put together and my first thought was, ‘How are we going to make this work when we don’t know each other? It was such a leap of faith.”

A fractious start

Desperate to catch up with the other bands, the newly-formed five-piece spent an intense two intense weeks practising in a bungalow at the bottom of Harry’s step-dad’s garden in Holmes Chapel, Cheshire.

But contrary to their bright white smiles and boyish banter, their very different personalities were already beginning to show, laying the foundations for the resentment, jealously and anger that would one day cause the group to implode.

“We used to be at each other’s throats on the X Factor,” Louis admitted on their This Is Us DVD of his clashes with Liam.

“Whenever I wanted to do anything slightly mischievous, he was always the daddy.”

“Me and Louis did not get on at all,” Wolverhampton-born Liam agreed. “We were two completely different characters. There was one point where I literally wanted to whack him.”

Nevertheless, they sailed through the live shows and came third in the final before scoring a record deal with Cowell, who for them made n exception of only signing the winning act.

A mysterious fall out

By the time they scored their first number one with What Makes You Beautiful in September 2011, Harry and Louis were living as housemates in a rented £3million North London flat in the same block where Ashley Cole and Cheryl once met.

Then suddenly at the start of 2012 they allegedly stopped talking and moved out.

“Apart from Harry and Louis, no one knows exactly what caused the falling out — they didn’t even tell the other boys the full details,“ a source told The Sun at the time.

“But it was very serious and their friendship has never recovered. Everyone involved in the band is well aware of the animosity between them.

“It’s been central to everything else that came next with the band because there was suddenly a massive divide.”

From that point on Harry apparently refused to even travel with Louis and the fall-out would become so serious that bosses reportedly had to find a way to make their last three albums without the boys having to spend any time together in the studio.

However, Niall dismissed the claims, telling fans not to believe the reports.

"We stand strong as a band and we’re brothers,” he tweeted.

Those 'gay sex’ rumours

One theory was that the 'Larry Stylinson’ fan fiction depicting the pair as lovers had pushed them apart.

Louis, in particular, was extremely sensitive about the claims and admitted the speculation about their sexuality 'created an atmosphere’.

“People can believe what they want, but it comes across as a little bit disrespectful to the ones that I love, like (girlfriend) Eleanor (Calder),” he said.

“I’m so protective over things like that, about the people I love. So it created this atmosphere between the two of us.”

Zayn told how Harry and Louis had even dialled back their physical friendship in an attempt to stop the rumours.

“It’s not funny, and it still continues to be quite hard for them. They won’t naturally go put their arm around each other because they’re conscious of this thing that’s going on, which is not even true,” he said.

While Harry likes to keep people guessing about his sexuality, refusing to put a label on it, Louis has categorically said he is heterosexual.

And he was raging when a cartoon featured in HBO show Euphoria depicted a sex scene between him and Harry last month.

“I can categorically say that I was not contacted nor did I approve it,” he raged on Twitter , with a source telling The Sun he was 'angered’ that an 'awkward’ situation had been made worse.

Drug scandal

Whatever the cause of the tension, the rift only grew wider when Zayn and Louis were filmed smoking what appeared to be cannabis in the back of an SUV en route to a concert in Peru in 2014.

Narrating from behind the camera as he filmed Zayn lighting what appeared to be a joint, Louis could be heard saying, “So here we are, leaving Peru. Joint lit. Happy days!”

Talking about Zayn taking his warm-up 'seriously’, he continued, “One very very important factor of Zayn’s warm up of course if Mary J herself. In fact I will present it to him now for some fantastic singing.”

Straight-laced Harry - who wasn’t even much of a drinker - was apparently 'furious’ they’d taken the shine off the start of their UK stadium tour with their 'stupid and reckless’ behaviour.

“Harry is annoyed about the whole debacle. This should be one of the biggest weeks of the band’s career… Instead it has been taken over by this controversy,” an insider told The Sun.

“Despite Harry’s reputation, he’s incredibly professional and mature, and not into these sorts of antics,” the source added.

Booze battles

It wasn’t just Louis and Zayn who were in Harry’s bad books.

Liam’s partying was so out of control that Harry reportedly refused to go socialise with the band unless good guy Niall was there to keep the peace.

The pressure of spending two solid years on the road coupled with rumours about their future caused Liam to have a backstage meltdown in October 2015 with the band forced to cancel the gig in Belfast.

“The pressures of fame and being on the road for two years have made Liam ill,” a source told The Sun of the star, who would go on to admit fame 'nearly killed me’.

“He was devastated about letting everyone down, especially the fans, but he wasn’t physically able to get on stage. He had a complete meltdown.”

On another occasion he turned up to a fan event so drunk that it finally gave him a wake-up call.

“I’m not afraid to say that I actually went through a pretty bad [drinking] stage,” he told Attitude magazine.

“There were just a few times that I went over the limit with things and then I had to pull it back.

"I was very fortunate that I had lots of great people around me who said to me, 'Look Liam, you need to chill out a bit now.’”

Admitting he used alcohol to cope with the strain of performing near-constant touring, he said being drunk was like putting on a Disney costume before stepping out on stage.

“Underneath the Disney costume I was pissed quite a lot of the time because there was no other way to get your head around what was going on,” he told Men’s Health.

“I mean, it was fun. We had an absolute blast, but there were certain parts of it where it just got a little bit toxic.”

The pact

The band was fraying at the seams. Zayn was constantly in the headlines, accused of cheating on then-fiancée Perrie Edwar - which he vehemently denied.

There were rumours that he wanted out of 1D - despite the deal they were said to have made to release five albums and a greatest hits record before going on a 'hiatus’.

But Zayn blindsided everyone by suddenly quitting in March 2015 after a concert in Hong Kong.

In a statement he later admitted had nothing to do with him, he claimed he wanted to be a 'normal 22- year old’.

"I wasn’t going to spend another minute doing something which made me ill and which I no longer believed in,” he said of his shock exit.

Harry was seen openly crying on stage during their performance the next night.

But behind the scenes, the lads were reportedly furious.

“The others knew Zayn would have a head start by leaving first, like Robbie Williams did when he quit Take That,“ said a pal.

“It was frustrating to them as Zayn only had to hang on in there a few months and 1D would have gone on their long break united.”

Zayn would later go so far as to claim he’d wanted to leave the band from the very beginning and that he hated their music.

Friends no more?

Meanwhile, absence has only made the feud grow stronger, particularly between Louis and Zayn after the latter failed to support him on the X Factor following his mum’s death in December 2016.

"I had a couple of calls with him after I lost my mum and all the boys had agreed to come to that performance and he didn’t show, so that really bugged me,” he said on the Dan Wootton podcast.

“It was just seeing everyone there – Harry, Niall and Liam – that was what I needed that night, that support,” he said. “So on the other end of the spectrum it kind of really showed. So, eh, I hope he’s alright, but…”

Niall admits he doesn’t even have Zayn’s number and that he’s constantly changing it, while Zayn sniped that he didn’t 'really’ speak to Harry when they were in the band so didn’t expect to have a friendship after.

“I ain’t spoke to any of them for a long time, to be honest with you. That’s just the way it is,” he told Vogue.

“There’s things that happen and things that were said after I left…Snide things. Small things that I would never have expected.”

So could they ever reunite?

Mirror - July 23, 2019

Our last winter, 9/31

► Our last winter - Human!Ninth Doctor/Rose Tyler. ► Written for @doctorroseprompts 31 days of ficmas. Day 9: Peace. ► AU Verse, Teen. ► 1,347 words. ► A/N: This is a prequelle to Ghost of you.

“Winter is the time for comfort, for good food and warmth, for the touch of a friendly hand and for a talk beside the fire: it is time for home.” - Edith Sitwell.

Maxence was feeling peaceful this evening. Now that everyone was gone and the kitchen was all clean, he could relax in a hot bath with a book. He was only missing his wife. She had said she would meet him later because she had something to do first but it this something was taking a lot of time in his opinion and she still wasn’t showing up. He glanced at the clock on the wall. Twenty minutes already. What was she doing that required so much time? He put his book and glasses down and for a moment played with the foam of his bath. He called his wife who opened the door a couple seconds later.

  “What is going on, honey?”

“How do I look?”

  Since he would be the Santa Claus for the Christmas party of the lab, he had to practise and get used to the costume. For that very reason, he had covered his head and face with foam to have white hair and beard. Rose couldn’t help but chuckle because he looked quite ridiculous that way. It didn’t bother him to be that way when it was just the two of them but he would never do the same in public. He was too proud for this.

  “Ridiculous.”

“Not true! You’re impressed by my Santa Claus impersonation!”

“You wish.”

“You are.”

“Not at all.”

  To complete his ridiculous look, the foam decided that it was enough and started falling from his head. Rose laughed and Maxence felt offended. He slipped deeper in the water, hiding himself under the large layer of foam that was above. He might have put too much soap in the bath.

  “I can still see the tip of your ears, love.”

  It was the thing not to say to him. His ears were something he was very touchy about. His appearance was never something they were joking about because it was hurting him. Too many kids had mocked him about it when he was younger. Plus, he was the perfect twin of his father and that was very hard to assume for him. Especially since the man had been violent with his son and wife.

  “Don’t be an idiot, you’re gonna drown.”

  He sank deeper in the water until she couldn’t see him anymore. She waited for a small moment before she forced him out of the water. He was ready to stay underwater until she was apologising to him. If he was good at holding his breath, she wouldn’t take any risk to have him swallowing water because of something she had said. She knelt down beside the bathtub. Now he was sulking.

  “You’re sulking.”

“I don’t sulk.”

“Oh, you are. Most of the time.”

“No, I’m not.”

  She immediately sensed that he wasn’t playfully sulking this time. The comment on his ears had hurt him and his mind was full of demons that never really left him in peace. His physical resemblance with his father wasn’t the only thing bothering him. He was afraid – and the word wasn’t strong enough to describe the feeling of terror he had when he thought about it – that his behaviour might be the same. Sometimes, when he was moody, he was flying off the handle very quickly and it could be frightening. Rose was reassuring him on the fact that he would never be like his father, that his mother had raised him too well, that he was too gentle to ever be this kind of monster but the fear was always coming back.

  “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

“Said what? That I had big ears or that I am an idiot?”

“Max, you know I was joking.”

“Hm.”

“I’m sorry,” she repeated.

  She wiped the foam on his face with a soft stroke. She could see he was tempted to lean into her touch but he didn’t do it. Not until he felt ready to forgive her for these comments. Sometimes, he was forgiving her pretty easily but other times, it could last for days. It depended on his state of mind and he wasn’t in the best of moods right now.

  “Why don’t you go to Doctor Burnley’s office from time to time? She could help you with that.”

“Like she’s helping you with Jimmy Stone?”

  His tone was harsh and his question was unfair. Rose wasn’t helping the therapist to do her job right since the Jimmy subject was always one that was throwing her into a fit of tears or in a panic attack. Most of the time, she was avoiding this talk and they had to explore another side of her past.

  “She never brings the subject. If I want to talk about it, I do.”

“Doesn’t matter. I’m not talking about him. He doesn’t deserve anyone talking about him, or even thinking about him.”

  He grabbed the bath sponge and rubbed it against his shoulders and then, against his back. Every time they were having this talk, his old scars were hurting. It was psychological, he knew that, but still. He scrubbed the wounded skin until Rose took the sponge from his hands.

  “Don’t do that, you’re hurting yourself.”

“It won’t hurt as much as the belt that did this.”

  Rose lightly wet the sponge and rubbed it slowly against his back. Even if she was used to them, the scars on his back always impressed her. It was terrifying to think about the strength and the number of hits that had caused them. Sometimes, she was imagining her husband as a little boy and it broke her heart to think of him as a terrified kid with a bleeding back. He had been strong to handle all of this without a word or a cry. At least, he never said anything in front of his father. He had never shown him how badly he was hurt. He had never given him that pleasure.

  “You’ll never be like him.”

“How can you know that?”

“I know you. Everyone around you can tell the same. You can be angry but you’ll never harm anyone. A man who’s giving so much to people around him can’t be like the monster your father was.”

“Hm.”

  Rose stopped rubbing his back and put the sponge aside. Her husband needed comfort at the moment so the thing she was doing earlier could wait. He needed her more at the moment. She undressed and threw her clothes in the washing machine. She slowly stepped into the bathtub and cuddled into Maxence who wrapped his arms around her. The water was too hot for her but her body would get used to it.

  “Admit it, it was a trick to draw me in your bath.”

“I’d never use such a thing.”

  Indeed, he would never use his story to move her to pity. He wasn’t telling it to anyone. Whether it was because he was too ashamed of it or because he didn’t want pity from people who probably had lived something worse than he did.

  “You’re too pure for this world, honey.”

“You were speaking about yourself, I think.”

“No, I’m serious. This world doesn’t deserve the doctor Maxence Spitz.”

“It doesn’t deserve the doctor Rose Peters either.”

“Don’t call me Peters.”

“What should I call you then?”

“I’m your wife, I’m wearing your name.”

“Doctor Rose Maxence? Doesn’t sound that great.”

“I prefer being a Spitz than anyone else in this world.”

“Being a Spitz doesn’t make me a better man.”

“Your mother was exceptional. Wearing her last name and yours is an honour for me.”

  Maxence stole a kiss from her lips for that admission. He missed his mother a lot when he was feeling vulnerable like he was when his past came back to haunt him. He would probably go to the cemetery tomorrow. Just to pay her a visit before another week of work. Rose and him would ever be in peace when it came to their past but just the two of them together sharing a bath was helping them finding some serenity…

Our last winter © | 2018 | Tous droits réservés.

×××

Buy me a coffee?

21 kids and a kiwi.

Authors Note: I really couldn't help myself when I saw the picture on H's Instagram about Kiwi and this has been torturing me in my brain ever since, so here is a lil somethin' to get us through until the next two days until KIWI comes out. 

Harry Masterlist found HERE

It was only a matter of time before he became a music enthusiast who aspired to constantly be surrounded by the beautiful, affectionate, innocent eyes of children and their laughter that is astonishingly contagious.

Five years ago when he sauntered through the front door with a crooked grin and enthusiasm through the roof with his eyes overflowing with pure delight, you weren’t surprised when the words, “I am going to be a music teacher.” Escaped his perfectly rosy lips. You glanced over at him with a cup of coffee in cupped in your palms while your body was sat up on the stool by the countertop. You gave him a generous smile and nodded. You certainly weren’t surprised at all.

He needed something to do while he was taking a break from the A-List stardom life of touring and recording.

Over the five years, he triumphantly earned his Bachelor's degree in music, completed a student-teaching experience at the school he went to growing up and received his teaching license. It wasn't as intense as you had thought it would be, you expected him to be as miserable through obtaining his degree like you were years ago, but none of it bothered him, he appreciated constantly being buried in books and papers while discovering more about his passion. He never complained on the late nights he was perched in front of his laptop revising for tests and whatever else he was stuck doing at ungodly hours.

Today, you encounter yourself with your hands and arms grappling to hold everything, car-keys, purse, and many different snacks for Harry’s music class. Since parents were allowing their children to stay after school to rehearse for the winter musical that Harry has been extremely excited about producing. Harry proposed to feed the kiddos snacks. And by Harry volunteering to feed the children, what was really inferred was that you would be left in charge of the food needs of the individual children and their various allergies and desires.

You step into the front office and give the receptionist your typically generous smile as she welcomes you, opening the door for you to enter the foyer that leads to the rest of the school's classrooms. You wander the endless hallway of dim lights, eventually making it to the music centre. As you stand outside the two wide doors, you overhear the laughter of children echoing and the soft tone of the piano playing. You grin to yourself before you manage to force the doors open, instantly causing all the little eyes to stare over at you, "Missus Y/N," a few of the little ones hurry over to you with great joy, their little arms wrapping around your legs. 

You catch Harrys chuckles before he's by your side taking the food from your arms, "Hey Missus Y/N," he chuckles with a wide grin, kissing your cheek and making his way to the table that he has evidently set up for the snacks. 

You watch as the little ones follow his every step and endeavour to assist him, all of them listening to his every instruction and holding onto his every word. 

"What do we say to Missus Y/N for bringing us the food?" He announces to his group of what you like to call, little minions.  They all glance over at you and in unison declare thanks with a charming chime of "Thank you Missus Y/N."

You give them a small laugh and assure them that they are welcome before Harry proceeds to help two little girls that are a little shorter than the rest and having a troublesome time stretching for the fruits.  

You can't help but relish him with that gorgeous grin on his face as he does everything to help all the kiddos that require his attention, making sure each and every child is taken care of. If you didn't know any better, you'd believe he was the father of all twenty-one children.

Harry stands beside you proudly, "You're going to be blown away, jus' watch." He beams as his eyes stay focused on the twenty-one children assembled in a well-defined manner. "Lilly, sweetie a little more to your left," Harry gestures graciously and she shuffles to her left, "There we go," Harry gives her a thumbs up, "Okay, on three I want you all to show Y/N what we have practised... 1...2...3." Harry counts and a warm and soothing tone of young voices harmonising together and bouncing off the walls. You proudly smile at the wonderfully sounding kids as they sing 'Rudolph the red nose reindeer,' with cute, dainty smiles as they bounce up and down gleefully. 

"You know Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen, you know Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen, But do you recall the most famous reindeer of all?" With each name of a reindeer, a little one steps forward proudly. 

You allow the adorable singers to finish the song before you give them your own special standing ovation, "Wonderful, each and everyone one of you," you exclaim with such happiness etched into your heart. Little kids carolling Christmas carols is honestly one of the warmest things that you cherish. 

"Okay ladies and gentlemen, it is time to get ready for your Mummy and Daddy's to come pick you up, go get your backpacks." Harry gestures towards the other room where the backpacks and belongings are kept, "Don't forget your jackets it is cold outside."

"Can we sing another song?" One girl smiles as she walks closer to Harry and he nods.

"I think we have a few minutes, once you all collect your bags we can sing another one," Harry informs the little girl before she skips off happily towards the other room. "So, what do you think? Cute, huh?" Harry beams as he turns to you with bright eyes that have always brought joy to your fluttering heart. 

You nod your head in agreement, his little crew are by far extremely cute, especially when they're singing and enjoying themselves. "Yes, you have done a good job, they can even hold notes." 

"Yeah, they're a good little group. So, I was thinking the kids, in the beginning, they have differently decorated reindeer antlers so we know they're Dasher, Dancer, Prancer and the rest." 

"Seems like a good idea. All of them outfitted as Reindeer would be so adorable," you admit, already imagining all of the kiddos decked cutely as Reindeers.

"Mhm, I was thinking you could help me with decorating them."

"Harry," you sigh, remembering the last time he said those exact words. You got stuck last time decorating fairy wings while he slept on the couch because you got sick of scolding him and having to redo his creations because...well... he isn't steady with his hands when it comes to decorating small things with glitter glue. He tried, he really did, but he just wasn't brought into this world to decorate things, especially fairy wings. "I love you, I do, but I can't decorate reindeer outfits all on my own within two weeks."

"I know, darling, I will help."

"Harry, do I need to remind you of the fairy wings? Or the Halloween costumes?"

"Y/N," Harry chuckles, "I promise I am better at decorating Reindeer ears than I am pumpkins and fairy wings."

"Mhm, you owe me dinner and a movie night after all this." 

Harry nods, "of course, I'll even cook for yeh." 

You grin and graciously nod in agreement to his proposal. You can never turn down his propositions to cook. The second best thing to seeing him prepare the children is to observe him dance around the kitchen with nothing but a pair of sweatpants on while he hums along to his favourite songs. It's breathtaking, to say the least. 

You and Harry both stand and welcome each parent as they walk in to claim their children with wide grins when they see how the children are vibrant and beaming. 

Once the last child leaves, Harry turns to you, "Thanks, thank you for everything you do and allowing me to do this," he gestures his arms around to his little music room that has become his 'safe-haven,' you could say. His safe haven to escape the world used to be the studio, and since he is taking a hiatus with his music career as an artist, he has resorted to his music room as his place. He loves the laughter of children and the vibration of their beautiful voices as he performs on the piano and teaches them new songs. Harry loves observing their faces light up when their favourite songs get played and he especially loves it when they request some of the older songs that he has taught them with parental consent.

His eyes are evermore an eminent shade and his smile is invariably a little bit wider when he gets to spend extra time with the little ones and preparing for small musicals and recitals. He has a soft spot for kids, it is obvious, and there is a part of you that absolutely adores watching him operate his magic with so many young individuals who have a strong devotion and passion for music like he does. He is connected with them on a different level, it's beautiful to witness.

You lean up and kiss Harry sweetly before you carefully pull away, "You always support me. It is no problem. But, next time you want to sign me up for snack duty, don't remind me at midnight." 

"Yeah, sorry about that love, I forgot." 

"I know," you chuckle, "So, I was in the fruit aisle today, take a guess what I stumbled upon?" You grin cheekily as Harry crosses his arms over his chest and raises his brow.

"Well, darling, I am assuming you stumbled across the fruit."

"Smart ass," you roll your eyes at your husband who is grinning widely at his comment, "I happened to catch a glimpse at some kiwis," you inform Harry and he instantly chuckles while covering his face with his hands, "I got a few, too. I remember you enjoy them quite a bit." 

He chuckles and shakes his head, "oh my, I don't think I am ever going to live that down, am I?" 

"Mmm, no," you shake your head, "So, can you remind me how it goes again?" you purposely bat your eyes and grin at him as he rolls his eyes and curls his lips. 

It has been a while since the all-so-famous song Kiwi has been brought up. You can't really help yourself today, especially considering how at one point he came home with a box full of kiwis thanks to a dedicated fan who was quite the comedian. 

Harry steps closer to you, his hands pressing to your waists while his lips caress to the corner of your mouth. Your arms drape over his shoulders and shivers become pulsated down your spile as his soft breath steadily hits your bare neck as he slowly sings.

 "She worked her way through a cheap pack of cigarettes. Hard liquor mixed with a bit of intellect. And all the boys, they were saying they were into it. Such a pretty face, on a pretty neck."

(Tell me what you think, here). 

This time nine years ago, five teenage boys' dreams were in tatters after being rejected from the X Factor .

But determined not to let a good-looking gang go to waste, show boss Simon Cowell and his genius decided to put solo hopefuls Niall Horan, Zayn Malik, Liam Payne, Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson together.

It took the lads just five minutes to agree to his plan and have another crack at the competition - this time in the groups category.

They would go on to be one of the most successful boybands of the century, selling out stadiums and dominating the charts for five years before splitting in an explosion of bitterness and animosity.

But with no experience of harmonies, group singing or even each other, even then Liam wondered what they were really getting into.

"We had seen each other at Bootcamp and got on well, and Niall and I had shared a room. But we were competition then, and at the back of the minds we knew were against each other," Liam would later recall.

"So it was strange when we were put together and my first thought was, 'How are we going to make this work when we don't know each other? It was such a leap of faith."

Desperate to catch up with the other bands, the newly-formed five-piece spent an intense two intense weeks practising in a bungalow at the bottom of Harry's step-dad's garden in Holmes Chapel, Cheshire.

But contrary to their bright white smiles and boyish banter, their very different personalities were already beginning to show, laying the foundations for the resentment, jealously and anger that would one day cause the group to implode.

"We used to be at each other’s throats on the X Factor," Louis admitted on their This Is Us DVD of his clashes with Liam.

"Whenever I wanted to do anything slightly mischievous, he was always the daddy."

"Me and Louis did not get on at all," Wolverhampton-born Liam agreed. "We were two completely different characters. There was one point where I literally wanted to whack him."

Nevertheless, they sailed through the live shows and came third in the final before scoring a record deal with Cowell, who for them made n exception of only signing the winning act.

A mysterious fall out

By the time they scored their first number one with What Makes You Beautiful in September 2011, Harry and Louis were living as housemates in a rented £3million North London flat in the same block where Ashley Cole and Cheryl once met.

Then suddenly at the start of 2012 they allegedly stopped talking and moved out.

“Apart from Harry and Louis, no one knows exactly what caused the falling out — they didn’t even tell the other boys the full details," a source told The Sun at the time.

“But it was very serious and their friendship has never recovered. Everyone involved in the band is well aware of the animosity between them.

“It’s been central to everything else that came next with the band because there was suddenly a massive divide.”

From that point on Harry apparently refused to even travel with Louis and the fall-out would become so serious that bosses reportedly had to find a way to make their last three albums without the boys having to spend any time together in the studio.

However, Niall dismissed the claims, telling fans not to believe the reports.

"We stand strong as a band and we’re brothers," he tweeted.

Those 'gay sex' rumours

One theory was that the 'Larry Stylinson' fan fiction depicting the pair as lovers had pushed them apart.

Louis, in particular, was extremely sensitive about the claims and admitted the speculation about their sexuality 'created an atmosphere'.

"People can believe what they want, but it comes across as a little bit disrespectful to the ones that I love, like (girlfriend) Eleanor (Calder)," he said.

"I'm so protective over things like that, about the people I love. So it created this atmosphere between the two of us."

Zayn told how Harry and Louis had even dialled back their physical friendship in an attempt to stop the rumours.

"It's not funny, and it still continues to be quite hard for them. They won't naturally go put their arm around each other because they're conscious of this thing that's going on, which is not even true," he said.

While Harry likes to keep people guessing about his sexuality, refusing to put a label on it, Louis has categorically said he is heterosexual.

And he was raging when a cartoon featured in HBO show Euphoria depicted a sex scene between him and Harry last month.

"I can categorically say that I was not contacted nor did I approve it," he raged on Twitter , with a source telling The Sun he was 'angered' that an 'awkward' situation had been made worse.

Drug scandal

Whatever the cause of the tension, the rift only grew wider when Zayn and Louis were filmed smoking what appeared to be cannabis in the back of an SUV en route to a concert in Peru in 2014.

Narrating from behind the camera as he filmed Zayn lighting what appeared to be a joint, Louis could be heard saying, "So here we are, leaving Peru. Joint lit. Happy days!"

Talking about Zayn taking his warm-up 'seriously', he continued, "One very very important factor of Zayn’s warm up of course if Mary J herself. In fact I will present it to him now for some fantastic singing."

Straight-laced Harry - who wasn't even much of a drinker - was apparently 'furious' they'd taken the shine off the start of their UK stadium tour with their 'stupid and reckless' behaviour.

"Harry is annoyed about the whole debacle. This should be one of the biggest weeks of the band's career... Instead it has been taken over by this controversy," an insider told The Sun.

"Despite Harry's reputation, he's incredibly professional and mature, and not into these sorts of antics," the source added.

Booze battles

It wasn't just Louis and Zayn who were in Harry's bad books.

Liam's partying was so out of control that Harry reportedly refused to go socialise with the band unless good guy Niall was there to keep the peace.

The pressure of spending two solid years on the road coupled with rumours about their future caused Liam to have a backstage meltdown in October 2015 with the band forced to cancel the gig in Belfast.

"The pressures of fame and being on the road for two years have made Liam ill," a source told The Sun of the star, who would go on to admit fame 'nearly killed me'.

“He was devastated about letting everyone down, especially the fans, but he wasn’t physically able to get on stage. He had a complete meltdown.”

On another occasion he turned up to a fan event so drunk that it finally gave him a wake-up call.

"I'm not afraid to say that I actually went through a pretty bad [drinking] stage," he told Attitude magazine.

"There were just a few times that I went over the limit with things and then I had to pull it back.

"I was very fortunate that I had lots of great people around me who said to me, 'Look Liam, you need to chill out a bit now.'"

Admitting he used alcohol to cope with the strain of performing near-constant touring, he said being drunk was like putting on a Disney costume before stepping out on stage.

"Underneath the Disney costume I was pissed quite a lot of the time because there was no other way to get your head around what was going on,” he told Men's Health.

“I mean, it was fun. We had an absolute blast, but there were certain parts of it where it just got a little bit toxic.”

The pact

The band was fraying at the seams. Zayn was constantly in the headlines, accused of cheating on then-fiancée Perrie Edwar - which he vehemently denied.

There were rumours that he wanted out of 1D - despite the deal they were said to have made to release five albums and a greatest hits record before going on a 'hiatus'.

But Zayn blindsided everyone by suddenly quitting in March 2015 after a concert in Hong Kong.

In a statement he later admitted had nothing to do with him, he claimed he wanted to be a 'normal 22- year old'.

"I wasn't going to spend another minute doing something which made me ill and which I no longer believed in," he said of his shock exit.

Harry was seen openly crying on stage during their performance the next night.

But behind the scenes, the lads were reportedly furious.

“The others knew Zayn would have a head start by leaving first, like Robbie Williams did when he quit Take That," said a pal.

“It was frustrating to them as Zayn only had to hang on in there a few months and 1D would have gone on their long break united.”

Zayn would later go so far as to claim he'd wanted to leave the band from the very beginning and that he hated their music.

Friends no more?

Meanwhile, absence has only made the feud grow stronger, particularly between Louis and Zayn after the latter failed to support him on the X Factor following his mum's death in December 2016.

"I had a couple of calls with him after I lost my mum and all the boys had agreed to come to that performance and he didn't show, so that really bugged me," he said on the Dan Wootton podcast.

"It was just seeing everyone there – Harry, Niall and Liam – that was what I needed that night, that support," he said. "So on the other end of the spectrum it kind of really showed. So, eh, I hope he's alright, but..."

Niall admits he doesn't even have Zayn's number and that he's constantly changing it, while Zayn sniped that he didn't 'really' speak to Harry when they were in the band so didn't expect to have a friendship after.

"I ain't spoke to any of them for a long time, to be honest with you. That's just the way it is," he told Vogue.

"There's things that happen and things that were said after I left...Snide things. Small things that I would never have expected."

So could they ever reunite?

While Louis says it's 'inevitable', Harry reportedly isn't on the same wavelength.

“Since stepping away from 1D Harry has really enjoyed life outside that pop bubble," a source said.

“And right now he has absolutely no desire to get 1D back together.”

The Advertisement of my Life Part 2

Summary: The first week of being the Nanny of Tom and Shep ends quite exhausted.

Prompt: “What she said” (wait for part 3)

Characters: Jared Padalecki, Tom and Shep Padalecki, Reader, Jensen Ackles (Only mentioned: Misha Collins, Mark Sheppard, Richard Speight Jr., Ruth Connell)

Paring: for now, none (pssst, later)

Wordcount: 1.3k Words

Warnings: none (but if I have overlooked something, please tell me.)

A/N: Jared and Gen are divorced (nothing against Gen, I love her, I just couldn’t find different reason)

I wrote this for the wonderful @luci-in-trenchcoats for her 2k follower challenge

Tags: @pretty-fortune @smoothdogsgirl

November 2015     

I picked up the habits in the Padalecki household really fast. Luckily Andrea the manager send me the eating customs and morning/evening routines of the boys as soon as it was clear I would start working as the nanny. Tom had to be at 8 am at the preschool. Jared would spend the first half of his day practising lines and playing with his kids in the other half.

As soon as I had Tom dropped off, I went grocery shopping with Shep. He sat happily in the seat of the shopping cart while I put the groceries in the basket.

“What do you want to eat for dinner Shep?”, I asked the two-year-old, expecting an answer like ice-cream or waffles.

“Dunno. What do you like?”, he asked back.

“Well, my favourite food was always the goulash my granny made.”

“The do that”, he said with a surprising stern voice.

“Goulash is it then.” We walked through the aisles until we had everything I needed. I paid and packed everything into the trunk of Jared’s Jeep. Lucas wanted to drive me, but I rejected thankfully.  Soon we reached the house and I parked the car in the garage.

“I wanna bring somfwing, too!”, the little one exclaimed, suppressing a yawn.

“Of course you can carry something. But I thing then it’s time for a nap. Don’t you think?”, I carefully handed him a small bag of carrots, which couldn’t take any damage if he would drop it.

“No!”, this time he didn’t manage to hide his tiredness and an even bigger yawn slipped out, “I’m not tired, (Y/N/N)!”

“Let’s get the groceries in. We can talk about it later.”

“Okay, ” He rubbed his eyes and carried one of the paprikas into the kitchen.

“Well hello, little man! What are you doing here? Where is (Y/N/N)?, a familiar voice rung out.

“I’m here!” Heavily packed with the bags I stepped into the kitchen and launched them onto the counter.  

“How was Tom?”

“They are both angles. Shep helped me shopping. We decided to make goulash for dinner if that’s okay.” I said while sorting everything into the cabinets.

“I’m not a very picky eater. So, it’s great with me.”

I brought Shep after a small snack and an even smaller discussion to bed and headed than up to my room to write a little bit for my book. After an hour, by now it was already shortly after 3 pm, I told Jared that I was going to pick Tom up from preschool and that Shep hadn’t woken up yet.

The afternoon was my free time as long as Jared was home. I finished another chapter of my book and read a little bit. At 8 o’clock my smartphone alarm began ringing, that was my signal to start preparing dinner. When I entered the living room I saw Jared laying on his back his sons climbing on top of him. Without disturbing their family time I sneaked into the kitchen. Just like my grandma told me, I cut the vegetables and the chicken into little cubes. I was so preoccupied with my work. Juggling 3 pots on the stove at once I didn’t notice that Jared had sneaked up behind me, looking into the pot with the stock bubbling in it.

“So that’s goulash?”

“Verdammt, Jar! You can’t creep up to someone like that!” I had nearly dropped the spoon I was holding.

“Verdammt? What does that mean?”

“Damn it”, I whispered into his ear, so his sons couldn’t hear it, “It’s german. I curse in german so the kids don’t pick it up that easily.”

“Okay, that’s clever. But you haven’t answered my question. What exactly is goulash?”

“Originally it is a Hungary soup but the recipe somehow travelled to Germany. It’s mostly meat and potatoes but I spiced it up with a few vegetables. I also use chicken instead of beef, it’s less chewy”, I explained.

“Wow. Sounds delicious. Can I help you somehow?”

“I’m nearly finished but it would be great if you could lay the table. I already put out the plates and the cutlery.”

“On my way ma’am!” He saluted playfully and does what he’s been told.

I finished the dish and carried it to the dining room. Tom, Shep and Jared were already sitting at the table as I set the pot on the table. Anxious for his reaction I waited for Jared to take a bite.

“Wow. That’s good!” He exclaimed, “Hmm. You definitely have to cook this more often. Am I right boys?”

“That’s delicious (Y/N/N)!”, Tom said happy eating. The dinner mostly went quiet, I helped Shep eating his potatoes and chicken. This evening I went to bed satisfied exhausted. Despite the reassuring, Tom and Shep could barely hold their eyes open and as soon as I had tucked them in they were fast asleep.

“Jared? If you need me, I’m in my room.” I informed him.

“Why don’t you stay. I was going to watch the new episode.”

“Uh. Sure.” Insecure I sat down at the other end of the sofa. But 5 minutes into Supernatural I was slouched on the incredible comfortable seat, desperately trying to keep my eyes open. My vision went blurry and I could hear Jared chuckle before I dozed into sleep. The next thing I remembered was a steady up and down, in my doze I also noticed the warmth of a broad, firm chest.

Jared p.o.v.

It took only ten minutes until (Y/N) fell asleep. I waited till the commercial break to carry her upstairs. As I was walking, I noticed how she nuzzled her face against my chest. To be honest I didn’t want to leave her alone. She looked so relaxed in her sleep. With a soft smile, I laid her down on her bed and pulled the sheets to cover her.

“Good night (Y/N/N)”, I whispered as I turned around.

Two weeks later

“If anything happens, call me”, he fiddled with his bag before checking if he had everything.

“It’s okay Jared. I know what I’m doing”, I tried to calm him, “And it’s not like there have never been without their parents.”

“Yeah, yeah. You’re right.”

“See you, dad.” Tom hugged his father tight.

“See you kiddo. Be nice to (Y/N/N) while daddy is working.”

“Bye, bye daddy” Shep stretched his arms out to his father, who pressed a big kiss onto the little one’s forehead.

“Bye, bye Shep. See you in a week.”

The week flew by in, what seems like just a blink of the eye, and soon I packed the bags for our one week visit to Vancouver.

One week later

Jared couldn’t pick us from the airport, out of obvious reasons, so as soon as he three-year-old Thomas spotted his dad, still in costume, he ran into his arms.

“Hey, big boy? Where are Shep and (Y/N/N)?”

“At the car. They are sooo slow!”, the three years old exclaimed.

“I heard that!”, I laughed.

“Hey, (Y/N). Wanna trade?” Nodding I gave him his other son and sat Tom back on his feet.

“You must be (Y/N). I’ve heard much about you”, said a familiar voice behind me. Quickly I turned around, just to face Jared’s colleague Jensen Ackles.

“I-I hope just good things.” I could feel a blush creeping up my neck.

“The best.” With a wink in my direction, he turned to Jared, “One scene and then the day is wrapped. Come before Rich gets angry.” And right in this moment latter came out of the door, of which I assumed, leads to the studio.

“You are obviously invited to watch, (Y/N)”, Jared said with a grin.

During the one week that I spend on set, I met Misha, Ruth, Mark and so many other fantastic people. A deep friendship formed fast between me and Ruth. At the end of the week, I was as sad as Tom and Shep when we had to go back to Austin.

The Rocky Horror Picture show rehearsal process

Monday, 16th January

Our first week of rehearsal:

Mondays are the days where we practise singing. The first 20 minutes of the lesson we did vocal warm-ups which consists of breathing in for 6 seconds, hold, then out for 12 seconds. We also made ‘HA’ and ‘HOH sounds from our mouth to warm up the voice.

As my group is performing the Rocking Horror Picture Show next month, we have to make sure we know the words to the song and also choreograph it all together. This is what we were working on today. We went over the second song that includes me and Lauren singing together. After practising throughout the morning, I found out how difficult it is to remember all the lines and the choreography of the piece. That’s why it’s so important to rehearse over and over again. As a group we understood this and we decided to book out the studio at lunch time to practise some more on The Rocky Horror songs. At the end of the day, me and the group feels more comfortable with this production as we now know how long it is and how all the transitions fit together. It’s just the matter of remembering all the lines and choreography as soon as possible. More work to be done...

Monday, 23rd January

How I don’t get into a set way of saying the dialogue:

Monday morning we use our time to rehearse the Rocky Horror Picture Show musical. As a group we are definitely improving each week on our production. We are all working towards getting the choreography decided and nailed for each song. I’ve learned that choreography takes a lot of patience because you need everyone in the group to listen and understand the steps to the choreography. For me personally, I’ve been working hard at home to remember my lines, for the songs and the characters dialogue. My technique is to just keep re-reading through the script in my head, and then write it out on paper so that I understand the rhythm of the dialogue. I don’t want to get into a set way of saying the dialogue - I want to see what happens with the other actors when we perform the scene. I never try and get into a set way of playing the scene in rehearsal. I like to keep it fresh and honest. It’s hard not to get into a set way of how the scene should play out, but if I do manage to stay away from the set way, then the acting should be spontaneous and honest. (That’s if I'm listening to the other actors).

Monday, 30th January

Why the audience is the final author to a performance:

This past week we’ve been working more heavily on Rocky Horror. Sarah came and looked at our performance so far, and the number one thing I have taken away from her advice was that our body movements - acting, was over the top...

...The thing about acting in musicals is that it is very easy to over-play the character. Even Marlon Brando did it when he played Sky Masterson in the musical ‘Guys and Dolls’. The performance is over the top and slightly cheesy. The way I've realised how I want my character to play out, is to have the acting to be realistic. I feel that a lot of people aren’t fans of musicals because the performances are a little inaccessible sometimes. The performances are a little too theatrical in order to compensate the theatrical nature of the story. What I want to achieve is to make my character Brad real, accessible and even relatable. It’s hard to do but now I’m working on it in every rehearsal.

I make sure I'm not pulling any unnecessary facial expressions when I'm listening or reacting in a  scene. In life we often don’t show what we truly feel. We don’t pull facial expression when we shout or whisper or listen to someone talk. We just don’t, and I think the reason is because it’s in our human nature to hide what our true feelings are. We don’t want people to know how we are truly feeling so instead we ‘act’ in front of other people. So when I play my character, I must remember what I am telling to the other characters through my body language, and what I am hiding from the other characters. The other reason to not pull so many facial expressions, is that you mustn't forget that the audience can work it out for themselves what the characters are feeling. Here’s an example why:

If a girl told me to my face that she hated me, and I'm just simply staring at her, the audience will probably think “Oh he’s getting angry...he’s going to explode”. BUT, if I was told to my face a set of instructions to follow by someone, and I'm listening with the same reaction, the audience will probably think “Wow, he’s really listening closely to the instructions”. The audience is the final author! They can work it out for themselves what the characters are feeling! We, the actors, don’t have to literally show them how we are feeling because in life we don’t do that. We hide how we are feeling. That is why when I'm playing a character I should NEVER over-exaggerate (unless I'm doing pantomime - which I probably won’t).

Saturday, 4th February

Making my character unique:

I was told by one of the teachers that she has seen my character Brad being played four times in different productions of Rocky Horror by different people, and she said that they all shout and get angry at Janet about halfway through the story. She was telling me that I needed to get more upset with Janet for whatever reason.... I understand her point that I need to magnify my performance and get more upset, but I also don’t want to be predictable. So how do I do that?

When I first read the script I felt my character was very two-dimensional. He only shows a couple of sides of himself throughout the story, and that’s not interesting to me. As I read the script again in multiple rehearsals, I still find myself as a one or two-dimensional character. No facts or hints to any backstory to Brad Majors. But then I thought, ‘I'm an actor, I'm supposed to be creating these backstory’s for myself.’ If there is no backstory or facts about my character set for me, then I can do whatever the hell I want. Nobody is saying I can’t. So next week in rehearsal, I will experiment more on my character. Change the voice around. Give myself a stutter. Change my body movement. Sometimes I find that watching great performances on YouTube helps me get inspiration and ideas I could use for my character. Al Pacino, Sean Penn, Jennifer Lawrence to name a few - but then I sometimes find myself just impersonating them when I'm doing a scene, which isn’t always good.

I have this image that my character is going through a transitional period in his life, where he wants to leave his old self behind and create a new, more attractive version of himself. The fact that he has just got engaged screams out CHANGE. Brad wants to be brave, but below the surface he is hiding his old, scared self, and I believe the further the story unfolds, the more my character shows more and more of his old self. That’s essentially my characters arc. From brave to vulnerable, then finish off on a song of me singing how I feel sexy.

I may have left it late to fully explore my character, but I'll make sure I make the most of every bit of rehearsal time I have next week.

Monday 20th February

Today we did a costume run-through of our musical. A few of us, me included, didn’t bring our costumes in today so we promised each other to all bring in costumes tomorrow. I find that playing my character with the costume on makes all the difference to my performance. I suddenly feel like my character Brad when i have the suit and glasses on. The glasses especially makes me feel more like Brad, and it allows me to play with them during the performance which can add comedic effect. 

Tuesday 21st February

A full run-through of the play was due today - and we did it in costume. I’ve probably performed the opening scene with Lauren over fifty times now, and today I found out that the repetition does pay off. The thing is, we know our dialogue so well, we feel comfortable to overlap and surprise each other. That’s the beauty of repetition. You get so used to the text that you feel comfortable to go someplace else with it. When I performed the opening scene with Lauren today, I automatically overlapped her slightly because of how relaxed I was. In life we are always overlapping each others sentences - especially with friends. Brad and Janet are so close with each other, I feel it’s only necessary to be able to overlap each other slightly. 

I feel now I can safely say that I know my dialogue so well, that I don’t have pull in to find what my next line is - almost sub-conscious to say the right dialogue at the right times. This is the place every actor should strive to get to as quickly as possible, then that means the real fun in performing can begin.

Monday 27th February

Another day of Rocky Horror rehearsal with the group. A couple of people from our group weren't in class today, so we had to do a run-through of the play without them. It’s hard when someone is missing from a rehearsal because everyone else improves their work, then when that person comes back the next day, he or she doesn’t know what’s happening. My performance can only be as good as the people around me in the scene we’re doing. If someone isn’t putting enough commitment into their character, it will not only affect them, but the rest of the group too.

- Move! - Move it! Move! Move! Now! It's me home. - Bye, Bruno! - Bye, Bruno! - Hello, sweetheart. - Mum, what's going on? - We're celebrating. - Celebrating? Your father's been given a promotion. - That means a better job. - I know what promotion is. So we're having a little party to celebrate. He's still going to be a soldier though, isn't he? Yes, my lamb. Yes, just a more important one now. There's some even more exciting news, but I think Dad wanted to tell you about that himself. - Moving? Where to? - To the countryside. That's miles away. What about Karl and Leon and Martin? Sweetheart, I know it's hard, but we're all having to say goodbye to our friends for the time being. Anyway, we'll make new ones where we're going. Won't we? Of course you are. You'll make lots of new friends. Bruno, you can have your friends around in the morning before we go. Think of it as an adventure, like in one of your books. But this is the best house ever. Well, you never know. The house we're going to might be even better. Dad says it's got a garden. Look, the thing is, Bruno, the thing about being a soldier, is that life is not so much about choice, it's more about duty, so if your country needs you to go somewhere, you go. Now, of course, going somewhere else is much easier when you know that your family are so delighted to go with you. Bruno! You're getting bigger every time I see you. It's only been a week, Nathalie. Well, perhaps it's me that's getting smaller. So, you two, well, what do you think of all this? Moving out of Berlin? Well, Mummy and Daddy say it's a good thing, so I suppose it must be. Children, be angels, will you? Pass some food around. Heil Hitler! Congratulations. - Doesn't he look wonderful? - Absolutely. I'm so proud of you, my boy. Oh, dear. I sometimes wonder if this is all down to me, making you those costumes for your little plays when you were tiny. - You used to adore all that dressing up. - Nathalie... Does it still make you feel special, Ralf dear? The uniform and what it stands for? Mother, it's a party. Let's not spoil things. Me, spoil things? You should be careful. Airing your views so publicly could land you in trouble. You know that. So, how long are we losing you for, my boy? - Until the war is won, I would think. - Well, not so long then. Bruno! All right, Bruno. Time to say goodbye. - Bye-bye. - Bye-bye! "Time has come for me to sleep Lord, I thank Thee for Thy keep "Watch this night well over me And teach me, Lord, to trust in Thee "Care for children, sick and poor Grant them, Lord, Thy blessing more "And this I pray in Jesus' name Care for my family just the same" Amen. Children, look. Look! Our new home. I have some business to take care of. I'll see you shortly. Well, what do we think? Come on. It's lovely. You two choose your rooms. I'll have Maria come and help you unpack. What do you think of it, Maria? The new house. It's not for me to say. But it won't feel like home until we make it feel like home, will it? Is he already up? Who was that? One of your father's soldiers, I suppose. - He looked very serious. - Well, they are, aren't they? - Why are we whispering? - I don't know. - And play with who? - The children over on the farm. Farm? I didn't see a farm. And that one, too. You can only see it from my room. And there are some children there? - Yes, quite a few. - That's good. - So, I'll be able to play with them. - I don't see why not. I'll wait a little bit, just to see what they're like, - because they look a bit strange. - The children do? - Well, and the farmers. - What sort of strange? I'm sorry. Vegetables. There. Bruno, have you unpacked everything? Because I think you should go back upstairs and finish off. Thank you, ma'am. Bruno. - I told you they were strange. - Who? The farmers. They wear pyjamas. Bruno, I was just coming to look for you. Well, thank you for that. That was extremely useful. - I'll be over to see you later. - Of course, Herr Kommandant. Come in. Sit down, sit down. Well, what do you think? Oh, dear. I want to go home. You are home, Bruno. Home is where the family is. Isn't that right? Bruno, you have to at least give the place a chance. I promise you, it won't be long before you... Why do the farmers wear pyjamas? I can see them from my window. The thing is, Bruno, those people... Well, you see, they're not really people at all. Bruno, who told you it was a farm? - Was it Maria? - No. It is a farm, isn't it? Yes. Is it to do with your new job? All you need to know about my work here, Bruno, is that it's very important to our country and to you. We're working very hard to make this world a better place for you to grow up in. But you're not a farmer. You're a soldier. Bruno, can you come and help me finish sorting out in the kitchen? I can still play with them, though? The children. I don't think so, Bruno. No. Like you say, they're a bit strange. A bit... Well, they're different. Don't worry, my darling. We'll find you some new friends, but they won't be the ones from the farm. Ralf, you promised. - You said it was miles away. - It is. How was I to know he could see it from the bedroom window? There was one of them in our kitchen. - Master Bruno, how are you today? - Fed up. You said the same thing every day for two whole weeks. - It's true. - Well, you should be out playing. - Playing with who? - I don't know. Gretel? - Well, you can make your own fun. - That's what I'm trying to do. One thing's for sure, sitting around being miserable won't make things any happier. - Bruno, what are you doing? - Exploring! No! No, not in the back. I told you, it's out of bounds. - Explore at the front. - But I've explored it all. - Well, find something else to do. - Like what? Come back in now, and we'll think of something. So, children, what are you doing today? - Same as yesterday. - And what was that? - Same as the day before. - Except you went exploring. - I like exploring. - Where did you go? I wanted to look in the back garden, but Mum wouldn't let me. The back garden? Well, God forbid. I expect you'll be missing those friends of yours. I even miss school. Well, I never thought I'd hear you say that. Anyway, you won't be missing it for long. - Really? - I've arranged a tutor for you both. A Herr Liszt will be visiting twice a week. So we're not going to school? School's coming here? On an old bicycle, I gather. It's a bird without the... Good morning, little man. And how are you this morning? - Can I ask you a favour? - Well, you can ask. Are there any spare tyres around? An old one from one of the trucks or something? Well, the only spare tyre I've seen around here belongs to Lieutenant Meinberg. - Well, is he using it? - Yes, he's very attached to it. Stop it. He doesn't understand. He's only eight. You're only 12, so stop pretending you're any older. What do you want a tyre for, anyway? - I want to make a swing. - A swing? That does sound exciting. You! Here, now. Move! Take this boy to the outhouse in the back garden. There are some tyres in there. He will select one. You will carry it where he asks. Do you understand? Well, little man, what are you waiting for? How about this one? Where's my mum? She's out. - When is she back? - Soon, I expect. But don't worry. - But I might bleed to death. - No, you won't. - Will I need to go to hospital? - No. It's only a small cut. Come on. It's not that bad. There, all better. - What's your name? - Pavel. Now, you've got to sit still for a few minutes before you start walking around on that again. Will you tell my mum what happened? I think she's going to see it for herself. She'll probably take me to a doctor. I don't think so. - It could be worse than it looks. - It isn't. How would you know? You're not a doctor. - Yes, I am. - No, you're not. You peel potatoes. I practised as a doctor. Before I... Before I came here. You couldn't have been much good then, if you had to practise. Now, what are you going to be when you grow up? I know. An explorer. How do you know that? Is it nice on the farm? Bruno. Bruno, what happened to you? I made a swing, but I fell off it and cut my knee. But Pavel here, he carried me in and put a bandage on it. - Go to your room. - But Pavel says I... Don't argue. Go to your room. Thank you. It's not fair, you having this view. Well, I'm not swapping. I think school's here. No, I mean more recent history. - Are you interested in current affairs? - Yes, very. So, you'll be aware of the situation in which our great nation presently finds itself. Yes. I read newspapers whenever I can and one of Father's men keeps me up to date on everything that's happening. Good. And you, Bruno. Have you been reading newspapers? - Have you been reading anything? - Books. Good. What sort of books? Adventure books, mainly. You know, knights in shining armour, exploring strange lands and stuff, and silly princesses always getting in the way. Well, this is why I'm here to help. You're how old now, Bruno? Eight? Time to get your head out of those fiction books and start learning about fact. Time, I think, to turn your mind to the real world, and I believe this would be the perfect start. Die, die! Die, die. Hello. I'm exploring. - What are you doing? - We're... We're building a new hut. Have you got lots of friends over there? A few. But we fight a lot. That's why I like being out here. I can be on my own. - I'm Bruno. - Shmuel. - Sorry? - I'm Shmuel. That's your name? Never heard of anyone called that before. I've never heard of anyone called Bruno. But Shmuel. No one's called Shmuel. I live in the house, back there. - Have you got any food on you? - No. Are you hungry? How old are you? - Eight. - Me, too! It's not fair, me being stuck over here on my own, while you're over there, playing with friends all day. - Playing? - Well, that number. - Isn't it a part of a game or something? - It's just my number. Everyone gets given a different number. Right. Then what happens? - I have to go back now! - Really? Yeah. It was nice to meet you, Shmuel. And you, Bruno. Bye. Mum, I can't find my football. Well, it'll be in one of your cupboards, sweet. It isn't. I've looked. Can I have a piece of chocolate? A piece. Yes. Bruno? - Have you looked in the cellar? - The cellar? For your football. Damn. - Gretel, I've just seen all your... - All my what? All your dolls, down in the cellar. Dolls are for little girls. It's not right to play with silly toys while people are away risking their lives for the Fatherland. - "My people's density is my density." - Destiny. "lts struggles and its sorrows, its joys and its miseries are mine. "I must work and create for the resurrection of my Fatherland. "The history of my people is great and glorious." And it's 12:00. - I'm sorry? - Isn't that when we finish? The termination of the lesson is for the tutor to decide, Bruno, not the pupil. Now, will you please continue. Bruno, there you are. I'm just going into town for an hour. Do you want to come? You be careful on that thing. Thank you. Can I ask you something? Why do you people wear pyjamas all day? - They're not pyjamas. - Well, those. We have to. They took all our other clothes away. - Who did? - The soldiers. The soldiers? Why? I don't like soldiers. Do you? I do, quite. My dad's a soldier, but not the sort that takes people's clothes away for no reason. What sort, then? Well, he's the important sort. He's in charge of making everything better for everyone. - So is your dad a farmer? - No, he's a watchmaker. Or was. Most of the time now, he just mends boots. It's funny how grown-ups can't make their minds up about what they want to do. It's like Pavel. Do you know him? Lives over there. He used to be a doctor, but gave it all up to peel potatoes. Can I ask you another question? What do you burn in those chimneys? I saw them going the other day. Is it just lots of hay and stuff? I don't know. We're not allowed over there. Mama says it's old clothes. Well, whatever it is, it smells horrid. I wish you'd remembered the chocolate. Yes, I'm sorry. I know! Perhaps you can come and have supper with us sometime. I can't, can I? Because of this. But that's to stop the animals getting out, isn't it? Animals? No, it's to stop people getting out. Are you not allowed out? - Why? What have you done? - I'm a Jew. I think I should go now. - Will you be here tomorrow? - I'll try. - Goodbye, then! - Bye. Little present, sweetheart. Thank you, Mummy. - Have you seen Bruno? - Outside on his swing, I think. Yes, Thursday's perfect. I'll have a car come to collect you both. Are Grandma and Grandpa coming? Hey, did you smell that horrible smell the other day? - Coming from the chimneys. - What sort of ill? The day I fell off the swing. - Did you smell it, Mum? - Father. Mum. Let me speak to her. Yes, she is. I can hear her. Yes. We look forward to it. Goodbye. - Is Grandma not coming? - No. She's poorly, apparently, but Grandpa's coming. - Did you smell it, Dad? - What? That horrid smell from the chimneys. What is it? I think they just burn rubbish there sometimes. - Look. - What? - Hey! - Gretel. Hey, that's not fair! - Gretel. - What? It's only a game. Ralf, this tutor you brought in, does he usually teach children as young as Gretel and Bruno? I believe so. Why? Well, do we know what he's teaching them? Gretel seems to have become so... They're being taught what all children are being taught at the moment. They mustn't get left behind. Come on. Let's get to bed. "The Jew slandered us and incited our enemies. "The Jew corrupted us through bad books. "He mocked our literature and our music. "Everywhere, his influence was destructive, "the eventual result of which was our nation's collapse, - "and then..." - Yes, Bruno. I don't understand. A nation's collapse is all down to this one man? The Jew here means the entire Jewish race. If it had been just one man, I'm sure something would've been done about him. There is such a thing as a nice Jew, though, isn't there? I think, Bruno, if you ever found a nice Jew, you would be the best explorer in the world. Continue, Gretel. "The aim of the Jew is to become the ruler of humanity. "The Jew is not creative, but destructive. "He is the enemy of culture. "Thousands of Germans have been made poor by the Jew." Master Bruno. What are you doing? You've just had your lunch, haven't you? I was going for a walk, and I thought I might get peckish. But don't make a mess of your satchel. Bring it here. - I'll wrap it properly for you. - No. It's none of your business. Bruno, what is it? What are you doing with your satchel? Herr Liszt gave us some books. I'm going out on the swing to read. - Let me see. - What? - The books. - No. Bruno, I just want to see what books Herr Liszt has given you. - I told a lie. - What? I've just got adventure books. Go on. Off you go, then. Now, Maria, there's two extra for supper tonight. The Kommandant's father will be here, and I believe Lieutenant Kotler is joining us. Here. What's the matter? - Don't throw it back. - What? Why not? - It's dangerous. - Dangerous? It's just a ball. Come on. Do you not like playing? - Just not ball games? - Not here. - Tell me how the number game works. - I told you, it's not a game. We just all have numbers. Shmuel! Bruno! What are you doing? My ball went over. I was just getting it back. They smell even worse when they burn, don't they? What? But, surely you... Elsa, I was sworn to secrecy. - From your own wife. - Yes. I took an oath upon my life. Do you understand? Elsa, you believe in this, too. - You want this country to be strong... - No, Ralf, no! No, not that! How can you... - Because I'm a soldier. - How can you... - Soldiers fight wars. - That isn't war! It's a part of it! It's a vital part of it! The Fatherland we all desire, all of us, you included, cannot be achieved without work such as this! - Elsa. Elsa. - Get away from me! Get away from me! Grandpa's here. - I don't believe this. - Grandpa's here. We'll be through in a moment. Who told you about this? How's Grandma? She's a bit under the weather, I'm afraid. It's a shame, she was so much looking forward to seeing you. - Perhaps next time, if she feels up to it. - Absolutely. You know, Ralf, your mother really is sick. She's been talking about this visit for weeks. Maybe that's what's made her sick. So, your father tells me that you've got a tutor. Yes. He's nice. But he won't let us read any adventure books. All we do is boring, old history. Let me tell you something, young man. If it wasn't for history, we wouldn't all be sitting around this table. The work your father is doing here, history in the making. When I was your age, history was my favourite subject by miles, which obviously didn't please my father. Why not? Well, he was a professor of literature at the university. Really, does he still teach? - I don't really know. - You don't know? We're not in touch, my father and I. He left the country some time ago. Really, when? About four years ago, Herr Kommandant. But surely he can't be very old. What is he, still in his 40s, late 40s? Where did he go? Lieutenant Kotler, your father, the professor of literature, where did he go? I believe it was Switzerland, Herr Kommandant. How strange that he should choose to leave the Fatherland at the very moment it needed him most. Just when we're all required to play our part in the national revival. More wine! What reason did he give? Was he tubercular? Did he go there to take the air? I'm afraid I really don't know, Herr Kommandant. You'd have to ask him. Well, that would be rather difficult, wouldn't it? With him being in Switzerland. Come on! What's the matter with you tonight? Yes, perhaps that was it. Perhaps he was ill. Unless, of course, he had disagreements. - I mean, with government policy. - One hears of such men. Disturbed, most of them, or just plain cowards. - Even so, all of them traitors. - Absolutely right. Presumably, if that was the case with your father, you will have informed your superiors, as is your duty. Lieutenant Kotler! You cretin Jew! Filth! Ralf! Jew! - But Dad just sat there. - What did you expect him to do? The Jew deserved it. Can I ask you something about the farm? Bruno, you don't still think it's a farm, do you? It's a camp. What's called a work camp. For Jews, obviously. Just Jews? Because they're the best workers? They're not in there because they're good, silly. They're no good at anything. They're in there because they're evil. - They're the enemy. - The enemy? - But I thought we were fighting... - They're evil, Bruno. Evil, dangerous vermin. They're the reason we lost the Great War. Haven't you been listening to anything Herr Liszt has been telling us? No. Not really. Dad's not horrible, is he? He's a good man. - Of course, he is. - But he's in charge of a horrible place. It's only horrible for them, Bruno. We should be proud of Dad, now more than ever before. He's making the country great again. Like you say, they're a bit strange. A bit... Well, they're different. They're the enemy, Bruno. Evil, dangerous vermin. Well, you see, they're not really people at all. What are you doing here? They wanted someone with tiny fingers to clean all these. We're not supposed to be friends, you and me. We're meant to be enemies. Did you know that? Do you want some? - What's your dad like? - What's he like? Is he a good man? You've never thought he wasn't? And you're proud of him? Aren't you proud of yours? Is it really horrible in the camp? How dare you talk to people in the house. How dare you! Are you eating? Have you been stealing food? - Answer me! - No, sir. He gave it to me. He's my friend. What? Little man, do you know this Jew? Do you know this Jew? No, I just walked in, and he was helping himself. I've never seen him before in my life. You, finish cleaning the glasses. When I come back, we'll have a little chat about what happens to rats who steal. Come away. New arrivals here are happy to discover that life in the camp is not all work. And that there's ample opportunity for leisure also. At the end of their day at the ironmongery or the build or boot factory, the workers can enjoy the many forms of pastime that the camp has to offer. Organised sport is very popular. Those that don't play certainly enjoy watching. At the end of the working day, the centrally located caf is the ideal place for friends and families to join together for a hearty and nutritious meal. The children, in particular, enjoy the pastries and cakes on offer. In the evenings, the occasional music concerts, either by visiting orchestras or, indeed, by talented musicians from within the camp itself, are always well attended. Other recreations include reading in the library, pottery, cookery, art and horticulture for adult and child alike. Almost any activity one could wish for is available within the camp. Splendid. - Bravo. Excellent. - Thank you. Goodbye, little man. Shmuel! Shmuel! I don't understand. I saw a film about the camp, and it looked so nice. I don't know why I did it. Gretel and everyone were saying all these things, and that soldier's so scary. Been coming here for days, but you were never here. I thought maybe we weren't friends any more. Shmuel, I'm really sorry for what I did. We are still friends, aren't we? Where's Kurt these days? I haven't seen him for ages. - Who's Kurt? - Lieutenant Kotler. He's been moved to the front. It was felt that his youth and enthusiasm would be put to better use there. Herr Kommandant, telephone. In actual fact, Gretel, he was sent there because he failed to inform the authorities of his father's lack of loyalty to the Party. Which was his duty, I might add. - Which was his bad luck. - Bad luck? Well, bad luck that it was his father who was disloyal, and not his mother. One presumably doesn't have to report one's mother. - What? - When will Pavel be back? - Mum? - Never, stupid. It's Father. They've been bombed. Grandmother's dead. "...the victory which You have obtained for us "and for all who sleep in Him, "keep us who are still in the body in everlasting fellowship "with all that wait for Thee on earth, "and with all that are around Thee in heaven, "in union with Him who is the resurrection "and the life, who liveth and reigneth with Thee and the Holy Ghost, "ever one God, world without end. Amen." He can't have that on there. She wouldn't have wanted it. He does. "Almighty God, who by the death of..." Have you ever been to a funeral? My grandma and grandpa both died just after we got here, but there weren't any funerals. That one there to there. They both died at the same time? What of? I don't know. Papa said they must have caught something on the way here. They had to go to a hospital as soon as we arrived. We didn't see them again. This is fun. Wish we could do something a bit more exciting, though. - That one there to there. - This one? - This one? - No, that one. - This one to here? - No, there! - To here? - No. - Here? - No. - I don't want you to go away again. - No. Neither do I. You can't behave like this! - You're questioning my behaviour? - It can't continue! I know. I can't stand this any more, Ralf. I can't stay here and be a part of this. Don't you think there will be questions? - Questions? - Well, now, what does it say about my ability to carry out my work if I cannot control my own family? - Work? Is that what you call it? - Pull yourself together, woman. Right. Just ignore it. Ignore it. Ignore the fact that the man I married is a monster! Even your own mother couldn't love you. Are you happy here? Yes. Very. And you, Gretel? Well, I was, but I do miss home. I miss my friends. Yes, I'm sure. And you, too, Bruno. You must miss those friends of yours. No. Not any more, really. I suppose the real question is, if the opportunity arose, would you prefer to live somewhere else? - Back home? - No. Not Berlin. Not yet. Somewhere safe, say Aunt Lottie's in Heidelberg, for example. All of us? You as well? No. That won't be possible just yet, I'm afraid. I must stay and complete my work here. See, at the moment, your mother is finding it... She just feels right now you need to spend some time elsewhere. Would you like that? I'm afraid, Bruno, in life, we often have to do things we don't want to do. The important thing is your mother does not feel that this is an appropriate place for you to be spending your childhood, and the more I think about it, the more I realise she's very probably right. - But, Dad... - No! It's time for you to move away. Is everything all right? We can't find Papa. He went on a different work duty with some of the men, and they haven't come back. I've got some bad news, too. I'm going away. How long for this time? That's why it's bad. It's forever, I think. Mum says this is no place for children, which is just stupid. - When do you go? - Tomorrow. After lunch. So, I won't ever see you again? Yes, you will. You can come on holiday to Berlin if you like, when everybody's getting on with each other again. I wish I could've helped you find your dad. I really want to make up for letting you down like I did. That would have done it, wouldn't it? Helping you find your dad? Would've been great. Like a secret mission. - I could dig under. - What? With that? - No, but I could bring something. - You don't want to come over here. Look. - I could come through to your side. - What's the point in that? Your dad's not going to be over here, is he? But I'd stick out though, wouldn't I, if I came through? I don't look like you. You could look like me, though. If you dressed like me and shaved your hair off. I'm not shaving my hair off. - You could cover it with a cap. - My pyjamas are a different colour. I could bring some. There's a hut full of them, thousands of them. Would you do it, though? - I want to do it. - Would you dare do it, though? - I want to help you find your dad. - I've got to go. Tomorrow, then? I'll bring an extra-big sandwich. And don't forget the pyjamas! Bruno? Mum, can I go and play on the swing? - Bruno... - It's my last chance. All right. Go on then. - I thought you weren't coming! - I'm sorry. It wasn't easy to get away. I'm not meant to be out here today. You forgot the pyjamas! - Did you bring the sandwich? - Would I let you down? Shmuel. Here. How do I look? Right. Let's get going. Bruno? That's enough. Let's go and find your dad. Come on! Master Bruno? Shmuel. - Can we go to the caf or something? - Caf? - Maybe I should go home. - What about Papa? Yeah. We'll check our hut first. Bruno? Come on. Papa? Up! Up! Get up! - What's happening? - I don't know. We go on marches sometimes. Move! Up, up! Move, move! Bruno! He must still be outside somewhere, ma'am. Bruno! Bruno? - Move! - Quickly! Get up! Get up. You must! Move them out! ...which means that our weekly capabilities would be almost tripled, so, therefore, by the end of the summer... - Ralf. - Elsa, I'm in a meeting. Bruno's missing. Come on! Wait here! Come on! Move! Move! Join the queue! Come on, you! Bruno! Move it! Go on. Bruno! It's all right. I think we're just waiting in here until the rain stops. Clothes off! Where are we going? No, it's just a shower. A shower? Open the gates! Open the gates! Move! Bruno! Read more: https://www.springfieldspringfield.co.uk/movie_script.php?movie=boy-in-the-striped-pyjamas-the-2008

100 Reasons I Love You

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100 Reasons I Love You

I’m a writer.

I can’t say whether I’m any good. All I can say is that I’m prolific.

I wrote the comedy column in my college newspaper.

I wrote a dozen screenplays and 15 sitcoms when I moved to LA in my twenties.

I have written over 1000 blog posts, 400 newsletters, 100 podcasts and 4 volumes since then.

But the most meaningful thing I’ve ever written is something “no ones ever” read before.

It’s a series of listings called “1 00 Reasons I Love You” that I wrote for the extraordinary girl I call my wife.

The first one was dated July 25, 2007. That was six months into our relationship when I first told her I loved her.

The second one was dated November 25, 2007. That was for her 38 th birthday.

The third one was dated April 24, 2008. That was when I proposed to her.

Since then, we’ve gotten married, bought a house in the suburbium, and had two children , now 6 and 7, who fill up our world with delight.

As a husband, father, son, friend, friend, and small business owner, I’m as harried as you are, trying to spread my day and attention around to attain everyone I love happy.

But, as you know, things fall through the crackings. That’s life.

We all have to pick and choose what’s important.

As a dating coach, I have a daily window into this, and one of the things I see regularly is how well-meaning couples fall into a rut and are beginning to take each other for granted.

To be fair, we all have a great excuse: life is, indeed, busy!

And actually, who has the time and energy to treat your spouse like you did when you first began dating?

Yet that absence of period and energy are exactly why relationships falter.

It’s why people grow apart.

All the little things stop and you fall into your roles.

You work. You parent. You sleep.

All the time you put into being a couple has disappeared and been absorbed into life’s other endeavors. Next thing you know, you’re wondering: “What happened to us? ”

THAT’s why I insist that relationships don’t take “work, ” but they do take EFFORT.

So while I’d like to think I’m a good spouse- I wake up the kids and induce them breakfast, I’m out of the office every day at 5:30 to help out my family, and I’m fluent in all 5 Love Languages- there’s always something that can be done better.

I’m doing it today.

This week marks my 10 th Anniversary.

It’s is not merely been ten years since my wife and I tied the knot, for richer and for poorer, in sickness and in health,’ til demise do us portion- but it’s been ten years since I wrote a listing for my spouse of 100 reasons I love her.

It’s something I’ve been meaning to do, but haven’t get around to, what with football practise, cleaning out the garage, and putting together that earthquake preparedness kit.

My 100 Reasons list is not a run of literary genius. It’s largely a series of inside jokes for an audience of two. But I’m sharing it with you today for three reasons :P TAGEND

1. I’m proud of it. I’m proud of my spouse. I’m proud of my wedding. I’m proud that I’m given this opportunity to let you peek in on my relationship and demonstrate you what healthy, lasting love looks like from the inside.

2. My wife is cool with it. Sure, this is written for private purposes, but my spouse has constructed peace with the facts of the case that I’m an open book. So while I respect her privacy and cherish our wedding, I also consider our partnership as an education on love that I can offer immediately to you. All the good, all the bad; I merely have one mode: honest.

3. True love are likely to be yours. While I wouldn’t hold my breath on your future spouse writing you 4 lists of 100 reasons he loves you, that’s because he’ll have a real task besides “dating coach.” What he lacks as a romantic and fast typist, I promise he’ll make up for with other traits: character, consistency, kindness, and commitment.

This much I know is true.

Great husbands come in many forms to the millions of women who look for them.

Great husbands come in many forms to the millions of women who look for them.

They don’t, however, come to women who have given up on men.

They don’t come to women who guess the worst of men.

They don’t come to women who think dating is a waste of time and that relationships merely lead to heartbreak and disappointment.

That’s why, starting officially on Thursday, November 1st, I’m having a special marketing on my Believe in Love program where you’ll get $50 off just for being on my mailing list.

Consider that my 10 th-anniversary gift to YOU.

You deserve to be happy and in love.

If you don’t have it now, then something has to change- preferably sooner, rather than later.

In the meantime, enjoy your day, hug someone special, and check your inbox on Thursday morning to take advantage of this opportunity to get your groove back and save big money.

Warmest wishings and much love,

Your friend,

Evan

P.S. You didn’t believe I’d shut this email without sharing my list, did you?

So, without further ado, 100 Reasons I Love My Wife, Volume 4 :P TAGEND

1. You always have floss with you.

2. You let me read bedtime stories to the kids every night.

3. You know how to turn on the pond heater and filter since I don’t.

4. You make a generous effort to visit my family whenever we can.

5. You have separate washings for blacks, colours and lights.

6. You say yes to all social plans- and often consider whether I want to be part of them.

7. You promote me to insure my guy friends.

8. You are the pioneer of the Mad Libs Dance Challenge.

9. You are really fun, considering you’re the not-fun parent.

10. You will always go out of your way to help a friend.

11. You validate me when I say I need more quality time with you.

12. You appreciate how much I want to provide for the family.

13. You offer me fair criticism in ways that I can always handle.

14. You drive six hours in a day for a weekend without the kids.

15. You make a mean gazpacho.

16. You rock those vacation wall calendars.

17. You care about the details of every barbecue, dinner party, and birthday party.

18. You continue to surprise me with random military facts that I don’t know.

19. You can expend three nights packing for a three-day weekend.

20. You need to have 10 all sorts of vinegar to eat one big heirloom tomato.

21. You listen to me relentlessly vent about the technology part of my business.

22. You are proud of your age and you’re proud that I’m proud of your age.

23. You know how to laugh at yourself.

24. You make sure the kids can laugh at themselves, too.

25. You are the model for all the Catholic wives at synagogue.

26. You sort through endless amounts of kids’ homework on the kitchen table.

27. You always prove that when I can’t find something, I simply did a “man-look.”

28. You are willing to go to the beach with me, even though you don’t like sand.

29. You constructed sure our 16 -day East Coast road trip was an experience to remember.

30. You’re willing to listen to my notions about how to be happier and more efficient.

31. You like to keep the pool at 88 degrees.

32. You get 97 texts from your PFA friends in one day.

33. You dominate at board game night, especially Taboo.

34. You are wonderfully shameless when it is necessary to karaoke night.

35. You never go to bed mad.

36. You can somehow sleep until 11 am on weekends.

37. You write cards that make me cry.

38. You merely cry when your computer is causing you trouble.

39. You will always want to go to a movie on a night when the kids are in San Diego.

40. You put salt on salted popcorn.

41. You actually owned a tank of helium for balloons.

42. You like math.

43. You are the designated poop-picker-upper when there’s an accident.

44. You never say no to a Mommy’s Night Out.

45. You curse more than I do.

46. You are more into reading, theater and politics than when we first met.

47. You insist on themed Halloween costumes for all four of our family members.

48. You have a whole section of the attic reserved for different holiday decorations.

49. You require two attics to house all the things you’ve never hurled out.

50. You like 90% of what I buy you for Christmas.

51. You trust me when it comes to choosing a restaurant.

52. You always order the least healthy( and most tasty) thing on the menu.

53. You are cool with canceling Christmas. Or our 10 th-anniversary vacation, if need be.

54. You are slowly coming around on the dog thing. Maybe a dwarf hamster first…

55. You eventually got into volume club- but you have a better idea if this one collapses.

56. You are always agreeable when I invite old friends over to dinner.

57. You treat my family like your own family.

58. You care about how you seem- and you invariably look beautiful.

59. You construct incredible meals in the crockpot.

60. You have a pantry with about 50 kinds of carbs, crackers, chips and cereals.

61. You don’t tell me how you vote- but I’m pretty sure you vote the way I would.

62. You are an excellent disciplinarian with the kids.

63. You invariably agree with me when we do our post-party rundown in the car.

64. You are the unofficial mayor of our town.

65. You embrace why my Israel trip entailed so much to me.

66. You are the best kind of stable- I know exactly what I’ll get for the rest of my life.

67. You are almost willing to go camping, as long as there’s a shower in the woods.

68. You are an easy audience.

69. You don’t count calories.

70. You attain bangs seem good.

71. You take pride in being the best school treasurer ever.

72. You’re sometimes willing to have sex TWO days in a week.

73. You use 12 pillows when you go to sleep at night in your pillow fort.

74. You knew every term at the Depeche Mode show and braved three days at Desert Trip.

75. You allow me to play dinnertime DJ and introduce the kids to our music.

76. You don’t want anything more in life than a weekend alone.

77. You still read marriage publications and consider them your version of porn.

78. You laugh at my mishaps at Thai massage places.

79. You drive much faster than I do.

80. You read much slower.

81. You say “I love you” at least 25% of the times I say it to you.

82. You are a hero to females you’ve never met.

83. You save random Saturday Night Live sketches for me to watch after you’ve seen them.

84. You handle customer service issues when I’m about to blow a gasket.

85. You make sure the kids are prepared for any fluctuation in temperature.

86. You never pass up a glass( or two) of wine.

87. You have middle-class savour at home and five-star taste in hotels.

88. You look great naked.

89. You stimulate me feel like I do, too.

90. You donate to every charity that any of your family members request.

91. You can take a 2-hour transgres from telling a tale and begin right where you left off.

92. You can operate on three hours of sleep.

93. You are more than willing to leave a party…an hour after I first asked if we could go.

94. You never induce me feel bad when I’m falling short.

95. You don’t let your past relationships negatively affect your present ones.

96. You understand my need to talk about my past- my father, my exes, my career.

97. You have the highest emotional intelligence of anyone I’ve ever met.

99. You know all my embarrassing anecdotes- and you’re still here!

100. You are my muse, my north star, my raison d’etre, my favorite person in the world.

Happy 10 th anniversary, honey!

Love,

Evan

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Time in Clowning

Disclaimer notice: this blog will contain my clowning development process rather than a day to day blog and also please note that the sessions are not in exact order. 

Term one.

Session one: On this day I am quite nervous to be in clowning because I only know Calum form the week before and I don't know any else so I come in my shorts and t shirt because I wasn't sure if we were going to get physical or anything so waiting by the door for Hilary (which she came late say 10 minutes), so Hilary arrives and we start off with chairs in a circle and we say our names so we get to know one another, we do that and start with a game of chairs (no better name that I can think of) where we have to not allow the chosen player a chair to sit on by sitting on them now we are in a small room and there I say nearly 20 of us (give or take) and I am just siting there trying to remember everybody’s name, then we had to partner up and designate one person A and/or B, A tells B what’s in the (which could be anything) and B has to ask “what is in the bag?” which was mad trying to make up (on the spot). Then we played Name tag where one is first chosen to tag another person, that person being approached can call out a name (simply someone in the classroom) and then that called person is it so on and so forth now I didn't get called out or touched (because mainly for touching quick in a small room and packed for being called out just didn't). now at the end of the session we were given an assessment sheet for what dates are happening and terms off and whatnot,.

Session two:  Now I have become quite ok with people names (minus a couple of them) we have moved from cad111 (the small room form session one) to cad107 (a nicely space room) and we start with musical chairs simple rules really walk around the chairs (which are placed around the room facing different directions) and quickly sit on them when the music stops (which Hilary was in charge of) we had to listen out for the music because it did at times go quiet whether the music was meant to be quiet or Hilary was fiddling with the sound, now at one point the music stops and I rush over to a nearby chair because another classmate Laura rushes behind “my chair” and pulls the chair away from me and I just fell down thankfully I didn't up with a sore ass or a sore cheek. so the games are over and Hilary pulls out a couple of white screens and she wants us to pop out from behind the screens and stand natural no fidgeting or picking our noses, so one by one went up and we had a giggle or two whereas  some other like jack got some laughs, when I got up and popped out of the screens got some giggles. Before we went home or another lesson we decided to do 11am instead doing 9am because we wanted our clowns fresh and out of bed. 

Session Three: We are back in ca111 for today (because I think 107 was booked before Hilary) we have a small class today (probably the others had other classes) which is great because we got a better chance to show off our clowns. So we played tag: fox and rabbit edition we had to partner up with another person, the class linked arms which only left two people without partners they became the fox and rabbit so what the rabbit had to do was run away from the fox and don't get tagged by the fox or else the rabbit becomes the fox (simple enough) but the rabbit can stop being the rabbit by linking arms with the linked people and the person on the opposite side is the new rabbit (or fox when we changed up the rules here and there). We pulled up chairs and a pair of screens to we played (I’m calling it escape) in which where there 4 players 2 prisoners, 2 guards now the guards not only keep the prisoners on their chairs by tapping their shoulders gently, they also have to wink to the opposite prisoner to signal the prisoner that they can run away to freedom, when the prisoner is free they have to say something funny to the audience for instance I escaped and said “how many Mexicans do it take to escape? Juan” no laughs just smirks. any way after this we watched TV, more specifically examples of clowns where be it silent movie or looking at duets/solos and also looking at Hilary made page with our blogs on it. 

Session Four: In ca111 (again) we play name tag and when another classmate came for me I couldn't for the life of me say a name so I don't get tagged but I did so I let a growl/grunt of disbelief which made it quite like a horror movie with the victim running away without letting the other characters knowing where I am or what I am doing, so meh. later on in the lesson we again have another look at the clowns (mostly for the others who were not in the session before). 

We do have a session before we break up for Christmas but it was a mostly for last laughs before we get home. 

Term Two.

Session one: We return form a restful Christmas and we are preparing for the final Clown performance and we are in room cab218 so Hilary welcomes us back with a game of keepy upies where we have to keep a ball up in the air and never letting touching it the floor while counting together (which we couldn't do properly) and we changed the rules like can only touch it once (though can touch it again after someone else has touched it) or only can use anything else expect our hands. Then we had a splash at name tag which again repeated term one Session fours of unable to communicate due to being approached by the tagger (good times), so  Hilary reminds us when the performance (when & where) is happening which was 214 the same room we are in today. So we got our clown costumes from the theatre cupboard. I grabbed a tweed coat alongside a straw hat (the hat brought me memories of when I was farmer MacDonald in Bridgend college Pantomime where I was reminded by the audience which were a bunch of kids that was I BALD!) now we put on our costumes where Hilary suggested I’d take off my trousers to expose my underwear but keep my shoes on and have a belt on around my waist (shirt can be anything as long it didn't draw attention form my legs.

That be me on the left side with the tweed coat and no trousers.

Session Two: We have a guest lecturer for this session and next session and he taught us how to trip over ourselves safe and yet comically and this trick was awkward for because I don't trip over myself, I only trip up the stairs if I cock my first step or if I cock my running on accident so this was hard for me to do especially when you trying to make it natural without time the bloody trip. the lecturer was lovely so it would have been nice to have him again.

Session three: We have the guest lecturer again and this time we have more classmates (because they again have other commitments) now we doing stage punching, slapping and then head-butting, He brakes us up into partners so I’m with Calum and we just have to show a simple scene using tripping and stage punching/slapping/head-butting which was quite hilarious because I haven't quite got the head-butting down because I would butt the upper shoulder rather than the lower shoulder where your head needs to be to fool the audience .

Session four: We get our costumes on and have to pop out of the screens and stand neutral and see if we get an reaction out of the audience and go off. Hilary has assigned me in with Martin and Ericka because we were the only three without an group so I  am happy.

We have broken up for Easter holidays which was for 2 weeks and a half give or take. So I will continue the rest of the blog as term two.

Session five: We are in the zen room which is cab403 now we come on stage with a pair of screens and a door and the door handles are easy to take off so there's comedy. So when we finished with the door we showed off our performance at 1 o’clock. So we explain that we don't have anything to show her because we haven't been able to get in contact or rehearse over the holidays she understood and basically helped us what to do. We went over what we did with Hilary and wrote the order.

Rehearsal one: we came in uni. at one and waited martin to finish his stpf which took longer than martin expected so when that was over and done with we went up to the Zen room and practise our piece and martin added a part where we three have a dance off (of sorts) and have the ending with me and martin running after each other over who shall wear the hat running with the benny hill song on.

Performance Day: On Performance day we have to come in for 9am, set up and start at 9.45 we were the second group to show off our performance. when the first group finished we’d set up for ours with a stool in the middle. while setting up I put the door away and almost fell over one of the screens leg wheels (is what I'm calling them) the show hasn't even started yet. We come to the end of the last of the group and ended with shaving cream pie in our faces, first for me was pied into the elbow and then pied in the face by Hilary. Did say to her after washing off the shaving cream “don't you cream me again”. Nadia took a couple of shots of all our shows while Hilary recorded them.

here is my group photo.

To end the day we played musical chairs and I was the DJ.

I’d say that I was a in the moment clown rather than a 24/7 clown..

Summer Research Reflection - 11th August 2017

I've dedicated my summer to the exploration of my new project. After generating such an extensive collection of research, I've began to realise the direction that I want to take, to better my own personal style within my textile practise.  This will enable me to explore each and every beauty that life has to offer to the best of my ability. Floral Geometry was the starting point for my project. I allowed myself some time to take in the true meaning of this title before I began to process any information. I knew straight away that I wanted to explore something original and unexpected. The world of Floral Design, I feel, is dangerous ground, as you run the risk of being seen a “generic”. This is because Flowers and Botanical study within design, (especially print) Is the most common motif used within the industry. In my interview at the University of Brighton in 2016, one of the tutors mentioned that over 90% of all textile production involves floral imagery.

At First, I thought the title was some what limiting, but soon, I realised that this project could be a profound one. One where I would use my creative skills and immense passion for research to develop a concept that challenged the industry of textile production in relation to floral design. At this point, the research that I have collated is purely photographic or text based. Although I understand observational drawing is important, I felt It was important to be able to explore ideas and concepts before I started drawing for the sake of drawing. The connection to plants and flowers is of course crucial to the project, However This project should subvert their form into something new and exciting. I first began In places that I considered to be obvious starting points. Visiting places such as Fletcher Moss Botanical Gardens - Manchester , and Kew Gardens - London.  I began by Immersing myself in the beauty of flowers and plants, to feel their energy around me, to observe their structures.

This gave me an immense amount of visual imagery to reference. From that point on, I began to look at artists and designers who use plants as inspiration. Some of the references came from artists that I had looked at previously in other projects that sprung to mind, Others I found along the way. Having been a member of the RA for some time due to my connections that I made being part of ATTRACT 2014, I went through every RA magazine that was in my possession to explore the work of artists in the last few years. This provided me with some great alternative references. The V&A magazine that was created to commemorate the Fabric of India Exhibition, allowed me to study the art of asian block printing, and how the asian textile industry has had a profound influence on the history of the textile production.

I Believe, I have collected a huge amount of information ranging from contrasting cultures and time periods. Both my visits to the “Objects Lessons” exhibition at the Manchester Museum and the collection displayed at the whitworth allowed me to extend my primary research, allowing me to collect data from scientists, designers, artists and collectors. The film installation “vertigo sea” (created by John Akomfrah) which explored our relationship with the ocean, was incredibly moving and provided me with much inspiration. The Summer exhibition at the Royal Academy of Arts - London allowed me to explore the world of contemporary fine art. I was filled with enthusiasm by observing such a vast array of floral imagery, both abstract and figurative. This was a fantastic way to look at the brief differently, exploring how a range of artists use various medias in which to express their interpretation of Botanical structures. I enjoyed looking at Renaissance Still life, originating from Dutch and Flemish artists, due to my interest in their use of bold, light and dark tones. It creates such a strong contrast between the burst of colours the flowers created, with the very dark settings they were painted in. I found a fascinating photographer called Sharon Core who emulates this aesthetic within modern photography.

The most Profound influence on my project was my trip to Europe. Over a 2 week period, I went to France (Paris) and Italy (Florence and Rome). This was something That I had always wanted to do for myself, as I went travelling alone. But Not only did I want to explore these beautiful cities, I knew that they would have an integral role in providing me with information and inspiration that I would not be able to access by staying at home in the UK. It was one of the best experiences in my life. I have never been flooded with so much artistic beauty. My visit to versailles was a trip that I had anticipated for many years, being an avid lover of the Baroque and Rococo age in which the palace itself lies at the heart of their creation. I was in awe of the intricacy of the designs that decorated each and every inch of this heavenly location. However, what amazed me most was the musical gardens. I loved studying the structure of the gardens both by observing models and illustrations and by walking around the gardens myself. Their was an immense feeling of happiness that radiated from me, and I knew that this feeling must be emulated within my work. The Queens Hamlet designed for Marie Antoinette is one of the most picturesque settings I have ever had the pleasure of exploring. The pastural motifs that she so loved were without a doubt a key feature of the grounds. The collection of carriages at Versailles was also a highlight of my visit, The textile manufacture inside the carriages was some of the finest interiors of transport I have ever seen.  Other locations in Paris such as Opera garner Opera Garnier, The arch de triumph, and especially the louver museum provided me with unprecedented amounts of inspiration and imagery.

In florence, The Ufitizi museum which held some of the greatest works of Botticelli such as “The Birth of Venus” was one of the best highlights. What I was drawn to most was the beautiful, delicate floral motifs that were painted onto the fabric of the models. Additionally, The Pitti Palace (or as my tour guide described it, “The Versailles of Florence) Also provided an immense amount of decadent inspiration, especially due to their collection of costumes and garments. On my return to the UK, this inspired me to begin to look at references from fashion history. I collected all the fashion related books that I owned, with the the Kyoto Institute of Costume books providing me with extensive references to fashion design from history. One element of design that I was incredibly interested in was fashion inspired by Asia, particularly China and japan and the art of Kimono making. The examples that were shown in the Koyoto books originating from the early 1900s have such a beautiful quality, That it is something I would like to show within my work. The grace and beauty that is shown in the way that style of garment hangs on the body, with the corporation of such intricate motifs is something that I am really growing to love. “Balenciaga: shaping fashion” at the V&A and its collection of garments allowed me to explore experimental garment construction and how organic forms can be used to inspire the shaping of the body in cloth. Chatsworth House - “House Style” was also an amazing display of Fashion Design, which incorporated a large collection of garments with floral arrangements at the centre of its motif development. Online Sources also provided me with key reference points, exploring designers and brands such as Rodarte, Guo pei, Chanel, Giambattista Valli, Dolce & Gabbana and Alexander McQueen along side references from Instagram.

I Then realised a connection between the imagery I had seen while in Europe. I had visited a large number of Churches, more then I had ever been to at any point in my life, and realised that a huge amount of the images I had taken incorporated imagery of floral motifs. I began to become fascinated with the link between the world of floral design and The religious realm of the catholic church. I forgot that ornament and extravagance is something that is so important to the aesthetic of the catholic church, and so Is a vital point of reference. When visiting the pantheon in paris, one of the things that strikes me most was in the Catacombs underneath the building. They were decorated with these beautiful wreathes, which at their centre, held glass cases of flowers (obviously imitation) covered with dust. This idea of encapsulation of beauty and preservation is something that interests me very much. Both The Duomo Museum in Florence and The Treasury of The Vatican Had some of the most beautiful garments on display That I Had ever seen. The intricacy of the embroidery which covered these robes in floral brilliance was truly astounding, as was the craftsmanship that went into the construction of the immense buildings that housed them. The Shrines and the ornate interiors, decorated with flowers, gold, religious icons ect. allowed me to see how flowers can connect to the spiritual realm. They can be used to decorate, to honour, to remember, to love, to grieve, to connect with our emotions. It wasn’t until I made this discovery that I realised That I had found something fantastic that wasn't a generic floral print concept.

It has taken me all this research to finally come to the realisation of the concept that I truly want to explore within my work. Having explored every inch of the floral geometry brief, my main source of inspiration would come from something I had seen before I had even started the course. In 2015, The Program VERSAILLES came onto our screens, And It would be the 10th episode which would have a profound impact on my project. Flowers have an immense connection with the spiritual world, and this would be reflected in “Bring The Garden Here” Episode 10, Season 1 of Versailles. In a deeply upsetting scene in which Henriette dies, The last thing she says before she dies is “Can you hear that? The flowers… They are singing…”. This would be the turning point of my research. I immediately thought “What a peculiar thing to say? I wonder if there is any truth within that?” I instantly went into a frenzy of excitement when I researched this concept further. I read a series of articles which explored the connection between music and near death experiences and found that this theme is reported in many accounts of NDE’s. By exploring the relationship between flowers and the catholic church, I realised that there was so much more to be explored, Not just references to the christian religion, But to The relationship between Plants and their spiritual meaning as a whole. From This point onwards, I want to explore the Importance of flowers and our spirituality, And how music and sound can be used to display the intangible.

Bertie Blackman · Crepuscule

Bertie Blackman · Crepuscule

Creative People

by Elle Murrell

Artist Bertie Blackman  applies the final touches to her latest exhibition. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

The Sydney-based artist pictured in front of her artwork ‘Searching For Crepuscule‘ oil on board, 90 x 90cm. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

‘Crepuscule’ is currently showing at Lindberg Gallery in Melbourne. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

Along with oil-on-board artworks, Bertie has created a series of dolls for the show. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

The exhibition is dominated by the colour indigo and inspired by the story of the last-known living Tasmanian tiger, Benjamin. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

Bertie and her sketchbook. Photo – Amelia Stanwix for The Design Files.

Today we learnt a fascinating new word, thanks to artist Bertie Blackman, whose latest solo art exhibition, ‘Crepuscule’ is currently on exhibit at Lindberg Galleries in Melbourne.

Referring to the meeting of the day and night – i.e. twilight, in Bertie’s context ‘Crepuscule’ is also the alternative-dimension hangout of Benjamin, the last ever Tasmania tiger, and his merry band of wide-eyed friends. ‘Clever, cunning and mischievous, he evades captivity by leaping through the veils of dreams and reality… through the Crepuscule… bending time and space,’ the artist narrates.

Extending this concept, all of Bertie’s oil paintings for the exhibition are dominated by the colour indigo, built up in darkening layers. The hue really reverberates the feeling of twilight for the artist, and she also loves the way the word sounds: ‘a bit like you’re already bending and squinting the light with the letters; it’s an unusual word, so people are very curious about it!’

It’s no surprise that Bertie would make an audible link, given that many people know the ARIA award-wining singer, songwriter and guitarist for her music. Though busy building her multifarious BB empire, the candid creative took some time out to delve deeper into her current paintings, AND dolls!

Many readers would know you first and foremost as Bertie Blackman the musician, but can you tell us a little bit about your background as a visual artist?

I come from a family of artists, writers and creatives alike… so for me, visual art has always been a strong way of communicating. I have always drawn and painted but, because my parents are both painters, I ended up steering away from it as I really wanted to create my own path. A musician is as rebellious as I could get in my family!!

Throughout my musical career I’ve art directed my shoots and videos, created stage designs, and painted costumes. In 2009, I had an auction of drawings at Moss Green Gallery, but it wasn’t until 2012 with my fourth record ‘Pope Innocent X’, that I really started concentrating on my drawing. For that album, I released a book of illustrations with each song; I realised that art, music and writing really just all came from the same place for me. And I didn’t need to be one or the other.

Growing up with both parents as visual painters, I witnessed extraordinary discipline and sacrifice from them when it came to their art. I learnt about the reality of what being a practising artist is really like – the blood sweat and tears that go into your work, and the extraordinary work ethic needed.

My art practice has really developed through just doing it, looking at books and persevering with the mediums. I have had no formal education, but I’ve got big dreams and big ideas! I’m forever shaking with adrenaline because I just find it all so exciting!

Your most recent album, ‘The Dash’, was released in late 2014, and since then you’ve also done some amazing collaborations. How do you balance your music with your art?

I do really struggle with balancing my music and art. I have learnt pretty quickly that I can only really do one thing at a time.

I tend to allocate big blocks of time for each. With my current art show, I put aside a solid block of three months. I’m finishing that body of work up, I’m already connecting the next thing. However, I’m also writing and illustrating my first children’s picture book, which will be published in 2018. I would say I spend about eight hours or so a day in my art studio five days a week and then I work nights on my writing.

In between all of this, I have been ducking into various studio sessions, though I’m looking forward to getting into the recording studio more later this year. I’m also an early morning riser. I wake up at about 5am and usually meditate or go for a run to prepare for the day.

Your solo show ‘Crepuscule’ is currently on exhibit in Melbourne. Can you tell us more about this exhibition?

I’m really excited about this body of work. I started working on it quite a few months ago – really working on my painting and developing my technique. For me, I have no lack of ideas or imagery, it’s just been ‘the technical doing’ that has been the challenge and also needing the time to make all the mistakes and learn what the paint can do.

I’ve only been working with oil paints for about nine months, so when I started, I thought it would be an interesting idea to just work with one colour, so I could concentrate on getting the texture and feeling in it without worrying about mixing paint. I love the indigo hue so much; it feels very otherworldly!

For this show, I’ve also made dolls, and bringing my imagery into a playful three-dimensional form has been exhilarating. They’ve become my little friends – I do take them out to dinner sometimes for a treat as well as long walks on the beach. I’m a big fan of Mirka Mora, she’s a great old friend of my father’s and I love her dolls, so this is a little nod to her wonderfulness!

Was there a particular story that inspired the concept for this body of work?

Benjamin the Tasmanian tiger has been a feature in my work for the last six months. He is inspired by the actual last living Tasmanian tiger who died in captivity in 1936. I love the constant conversation and debate as to whether this creature is actually extinct. Personally, I think he is still alive, and I’m hoping that through conjuring him in his ‘Crepuscule’ it might bring him back.

A lot of my work has been hinged in floating spaces or abstract dream worlds, this is the first series that I have brought the imagery into a landscape. I used to play in the rainforest a lot as a child, so I really think that Benjamin and his friends are totems of my childhood – me reliving those curious moments of abstract memory.

What’s it like being the daughter of a OBE bestowed, acclaimed painter, and creating your own art?

I think because my father is Charles Blackman, I definitely shied away from having a career in the visual arts as I really wanted to make my own way. I don’t want to live in his shadow, I mean, it’s a blessing and a curse. Because a lot of people know who my father is, doors have opened probably a little easier for me than others, but the criticism has been far greater because the expectations are much, much higher.

I have, however, worked really hard in the arts for over a decade and I think I’ve carved out a little space for myself to grow quite naturally. I’m incredibly passionate and dedicated to my art forms and people know this of me.

I most definitely get my singular thinking and focus from my Dad, as well as the wild untamed imagination and thirst for the abstract and curious. But I have also inherited other lovely things from my mother in terms of my art practise as well.

I think if the work’s good then it doesn’t matter how famous your parents are, it should be able to stand alone.

  Who are some other Australian creative people that are you loving at the moment?

Luke Storrier and I have had a great time recently bonding over having a famous artist father and also being artists ourselves, in our own right. His work is brilliant and exciting and I’m looking forward to collaborating with him.

Ian Strange is just one of the most interesting artists I have met. I love his vision, he pushes all boundaries.

McLean Edwards is a wonderful painter, and such a wonderful eccentric man. One of the family!

What are some of the resources you turn to when you’re in a need of creative inspiration?

The library. Books are just necessary and essential in my life.

Outside.  Going outside and sitting in the gutter and looking at peoples shuffling feet and framing birds and dogs and shadows.

My Mother. I call her daily for a chat about the work I’m making and she really helps make sense of my abstract thoughts sometimes.

Pinterest. I use it a lot to gather visual references.

What’s been your proudest creative achievement to date?

That is a very hard question! I think singing with Danny Elfman and a 100-piece orchestra at the Adelaide Festival, and also co-curating ‘Sonic Canvases’ at the Art Gallery of NSW have been a couple of major highlights and pleasures.

Also, just being able to exist as a practising artist my entire career without having to get a ‘proper’ job!

What would be your dream creative project?

I would love to create an underground lair in Antarctica… make dolls, paint, sing, write, and turn all my dreams into imagery… a language that can be understood by the moon and stars!

Amazing! What’s a little closer on the horizon for Bertie Blackman?

I’m excited to be painting my next bodies of work, to be writing and illustrating my first children picture book for release in 2018, recording a new record, and making a series of dolls. I’ve got big dreams. Gotta start laying the blocks for empire BB!

  SYDNEY QUESTIONS

Your favourite Sydney neighbourhood?

Redfern… it’s my neighbourhood! I love it!

The best meal you recently had in Sydney?

Fratelli Paradiso in Potts Point. It’s always amazing and it’s my favourite Italian food in Sydney.

Where would we find you on a typical Saturday morning?

At my local Redfern coffee shop getting a take away coffee and reading in the park – that’s if I’m not painting in my studio!

Sydney’s best kept secret?

The beaches are all amazing. But that’s no secret…

  ‘Crepuscule’ by Bertie Blackman September 7th to 23rd Lindberg Galleries 77 Cambridge Street, Collingwood