#13 i have had you for 48 hours but at the mention of you i will kill everyone in this room and then myself
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“the power of the doctor” // “the star beast”
#doctor who#MADE ME EMOSHUNAL.#13 i have had you for 48 hours but at the mention of you i will kill everyone in this room and then myself
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Two idiots in love. (P12)
Joel Miller x anemic!reader
Summary: The reader wakes up and Joel is there to comfort her.
Warnings: ptsd, depression, brief mention of rape, panic attacks
Masterlist
Part 1 and 13
...............................................................
Joel was grateful that he didn't have to deal with snow anymore.
Y/N had been asleep for almost 48 hours now, and he was beginning to worry.
To give everyone a break, they hid in an abandoned RV.
Just until she could wake.
Joel stepped outside to talk to Ellie, who was sitting on a truck bed nearby.
"Ellie! I found this in there! Beefaroni. Chef Boyardee." And he held up the can like a kid on Christmas.
Ellie nodded, "Okay. Cool. Probably won't be as good when you cook it."
They both laughed, but those laughs turned serious as they both remembered Y/N.
…
Joel was startled by the loud gasp of air that came from the RV couch.
He quickly kneeled next to the couch that held Y/N. He took her head in the hands gently, "Y/N….? You awake?"
Her eyes opened just barely.
Joel let out a breath of relief, "Oh, sweet girl!"
She let out a whimper and squirmed in his hold, "D…stop… stop, please…"
Joel wanted to cry at the lack of strength she had left.
"Y/N. It's me…"
His words did nothing to soothe her.
Her hands came up to grab his, "I didn't do anything… please…"
Joel immediately let her go to give her space, letting his hand move away from her face and rest at her waist.
But this only made things worse.
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" She clawed at his hands in a desperate attempt to free herself from him.
Joel grabbed her face again, determined to let her recognize him. He pulled her face close to his and let his voice relax, "Y/N, you sweet, sweet woman. Please look at me. It's me. It's Joel."
She simply stared in fear.
He had seen her be scared many times, but never had she looked so terrified.
And it was from him.
"You know me." Joel tried to reason.
She cried out as she studied his face. A look of recognition crossed her features. "I… J…Joel? JOEL?!"
He smiled with a laugh, "Yeah! You're safe, honey…"
She jumped into his arms, crying into his shoulder.
He held her tightly, letting his arms wrap around her shaking frame.
He kissed the side of her head in relief, letting his eyes close to enjoy the moment while he had it.
"You okay, sweet girl?" He asked softly.
She pulled away just enough to look him in the eyes, "Is Ellie o…okay?"
Joel smiled and gently wiped at her tear-stained face, "Yes. You protected her. She's just fine. You need to tell me about you."
She shook her head, "'M fine."
Joel shook his head, "No. You need to be honest with me. I need to know what happened in there."
She sniffled, shaking her head as well.
Joel sighed in frustration.
He watched her eyes fill with tears again at his sigh. "Oh, honey. I didn't mean to-"
"-Plea…please don't hurt me, Joel…"
"W…what? Y/N, I'm not gonna hurt you."
She was insistent, "p..promise me?"
He nodded without thought. "I'd promise you anything you wanted. You know that."
She seemed to accept his words.
But Joel saw the way the shine in her eyes dulled away.
…
"They had a guitar in that RV," Joel stated as they walked, "It was all smashed up but got me thinkin'. Maybe I should find one. I haven't played in forever."
Ellie nodded, following along with his trail of thoughts.
"In fact," he continued, "I was thinking maybe I could teach you. I bet you'd be great at it. Do you wanna learn how to play guitar?"
But she had turned her attention to Y/N, who walked on the other side of Joel like a skeleton that hadn't seen daylight.
Y/N was slowly turning into a shell.
"…Ellie?" Joel questioned.
"Oh, yeah. That sounds really cool." She nodded.
The three continued to walk. The man and girl occasionally threw worried looks at the other for the woman.
But neither of them knew what to do.
…
"I get you up there, you can drop that ladder down, maybe we go through that way. C'mon, I'll give you a boost."
But Ellie was distracted again.
Joel approached her again, following her eye line to see her staring at Y/N again.
The woman was sat on a crate nearby.
Her eyes never left Joel's frame, despite the empty look in her eyes.
Only then did Joel notice the hollowness of her cheeks.
The dark bags under her eyes.
The constant shivering of her entire body despite being fully dressed in 80 degree weather.
She hadn't spoken since the initial moment with him in the RV.
And that was a few days ago.
Ellie turned, "Boost. Got it."
When Joel moved to boost Ellie up, he saw Y/N slowly stand. He stopped her, "Hey, honey. You stay there. Just a minute."
When she said nothing, he took that as an answer.
He boosted Ellie up with relative ease.
She picked up the ladder, but got distracted and dropped it, "Woah…"
It crashed on the floor loudly, making Y/N flinch terribly.
"Goddammit, Ellie!" Joel grumbled.
He turned back to his woman, "Sweet girl?"
She said nothing, her gaze already on him.
"Let's go up, yeah? Can we do that?"
She let out a soft sigh and stood.
…
It took the two a while to catch up to Ellie, but when they did, they were in awe.
Well, Joel was.
A giraffe at eye level.
He turned back to Y/N, "C'mon." And he offered his hand to her.
But she only stared at it.
He sighed and nodded, walking to Ellie alone.
Y/N watched from behind as they began to feed it.
She had been fighting with her mind.
She looked at the two in front of her. Her family. She knows them. She knows she does. She feels safe with them, but her mind only replays David's words and actions in her head.
And she was scared that he was right.
The giraffe began to walk away, and Ellie was determined to follow it. "C'mon, c'mon!"
Joel sighed and turned to follow her, walking to Y/N. He offered his hand once more.
She stared at it.
Then slowly took it.
Joel smiled as their fingers intertwined carefully.
…
The three stood on a balcony, taking in the fresh air.
Y/N sat on the opposite end, needing some time to herself.
"Look," Joel sighed at Ellie, "I don't know where this hospital is-"
"We'll find it."
"Sure," he nods, "It's just… Maybe there's nothing bad out there, but so far, there's always been something bad out there… We don't have to do this. I just want you to know that."
Ellie scoffed, "What do you mean? What else are we supposed to do?"
"Nothing. We go back to Tommy's. We forget about the whole damn thing."
Ellie stared at him in disbelief, "After everything we've been through. Everything I've done… What Y/N did… It can't be for nothing."
Joel felt his jaw clench in thought.
"I know you mean well," Ellie smiled, "I know you wanna protect me. You have. And when we're done, we'll go wherever you want. Tommy's, sheep ranch, the moon… I'll follow you anywhere you go."
Joel laughed under his breath.
"But," she continued, "There's no halfway with this. We finish what we start."
He finally nodded, "Alright."
"And," Ellie pointed at him, "When were you going to tell her about her son?"
Joel froze, "…w…what?"
"I read the note, Joel. I know."
He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face, "I will. I was gonna. But… I can't tell her anytime soon. Not in her state."
Ellie nodded.
"Tell me, Ellie… what do you think happened to her exactly?"
The girl sighed, "Joel, you know what probably happened. You're not stupid."
He nodded. "Guess I was just hoping you'd have something positive to say."
She gave a sad smile, "Not about this."
Joel let his eyes wander over to Y/N's meek frame.
The things he would do for her.
...................................................................
Tags: @lover-of-books-and-tea, @pedropascalfan221, @lottieellz101, @bambisweethearts, @hiroikegawa, @elliaze, @littleshadow17, @n7cje, @ashleyfilm, @darling-imobsessed
#fanfiction#joel miller fic#joel miller tlou#joel miller x reader#joel tlou#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal fandom#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal x reader#tlou fanfiction#joel miller fanfiction#joel miller imagine#joel miller#pedro pascal#the last of us fanfiction#the last of us fanfic#the last of us hbo#the last of us#tlou
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got lovestruck, went straight to my head (got lovesick all over my bed) - nico hischier
universe: nico hischier x clementine sandoval (the blue au)
warnings: swearing, mentions of stuff you'd typically see in the hospital (death, etc), author has never been to switzerland (but wants to!!), fluff! angst if you squint
title: "slut!" by taylor swift
word count: 23k (originally 27k but had to be cut down bc tumblr apparently has a limit of blocks per post??? lol)
author's note: long anticipated (official) part two to this little ditty. takes place pretty much right where the first part left off and goes until january 2025. i love clem. i love clem and nico. i love this whole world, and it loves all of you right back. thanks for all the love, truly. it means so much. here are some more slice of life moments that will probably rot your teeth because they're so sweet! enjoy and please let me know your thoughts!!
~*~*~
Devils fans love Nico Hischier, Clementine realizes, as she waits in a cafe across the back entrance of The Rock, looking outside as Nico takes the time to sign things and take pictures with the fans.
To some extent, after being in Jersey for a full season now, she knows how adored he is — the multitude of 13 jerseys during every game and how she has never heard a single bad thing said about him, whether that be as a person, captain or player. But right now, she’s smiling as he thanks the fans for their support when she knows he was devastated less than 48 hours prior.
This team, their fans and this community love their captain. They’d go to the ends of the world for him, she’s convinced.
She feels her phone buzz in her pocket. She pulls it out with a smile.
Nico Hischier
Meet me at my car in 5 mins? ❤️
She smiles, just liking the text before slinging her bag over her shoulders, grabbing her half finished coffee and going back to the counter to order a cappuccino for Nico. She thanks the barista when he’s done, grabs the cappuccino and goes back down to the parking garage.
Nico’s leaning against his car on his phone, but puts it away when he sees her walking to him. She shuffles over quickly and gives him a quick kiss. She doesn’t think she’ll get used to that.
“Hi.”
“Hey.” The fondness tinged at the short greeting isn’t new, Clementine knows now, but it makes her smile all the same. “Thanks for the coffee. Sorry I took so long,” he says, taking his coffee and opening the passenger door.
“You’re good,” she slides in and waits for him to get to the driver’s seat. “You doing alright?”
He starts the engine and looks over at her with a soft smile. “Yeah.”
“You sure?”
He reaches over to give her thigh a comforting squeeze after backing out. ‘I’m sure. I promise. Play some music.”
“Do you even like my music?”
“I listen to anything. You know that.”
She chuckles, plugging in her phone. “They love you.”
“Hm?”
“The fans. I was watching outside the windows of the cafe.”
He shrugs. “They’re always great. Have been good to me since I came into the league and have stuck by us.”
She looks at him thoughtfully. “They also have nothing but respect for their captain, who led them through the season extraordinarily well despite all the downs.” She leans her head on his arm for a few seconds. “I know it’s hard, but try not to blame yourself too much. You can’t and shouldn’t carry all that weight. The boys know that. The fans know that.”
He nods and looks over at her with a smile. “Gotten good at that throughout the years, hey? Comforting people after big losses.”
“Tell me about it.” She thinks back to when Quinn and Jack lost the gold medal match in 2019 at World Juniors and both times Luke’s dream of winning a national championship with Michigan fell short. And those are just the ones she can think of off the top of her head. “I’m serious though. It’ll come for you guys. I know it will.”
“Thanks, Schätzli.” Oh. That’s also a new development. The first time it slipped out, Nico had almost taken it back with wide, panicked eyes. But Clementine had promptly pulled him down to kiss her.
The team all chipped in to rent out a rooftop bar in Tribeca tonight to celebrate their season, the multitude of birthdays that occurred during the last part of the season that they couldn’t really celebrate at the time, and to just hang out before people start dispersing for the off-season. Therefore, Clementine purposefully volunteered for the overnight shift the day before and took a four hour nap before she tagged along to locker cleanout. She hid out in the cafe while they all had to do their end-of-season duties.
But they have a few hours to kill before heading into Manhattan, so the new couple spend the afternoon at Liberty State Park, enjoying the rare instance since the night of their first kiss where they’ve both been free. Clementine’s packed a small cooler with some tiny sandwiches, fruit and small bottles of wine. Nico lays out a blanket and Clementine toes off her sandals. It’s beautiful outside, and after she’s done munching on the food, she finds herself laying her head in Nico’s lap as he plays with her hair, talking about everything and nothing. Occasionally he just leans down to place a kiss on her forehead or cheek and she feels her throat closing up everytime at the sweetness of the gesture.
They have limited time before Nico heads back home to Switzerland. She’ll take all the moments she can get.
“Can I ask you something?”
“Uh oh,” she jokes. “Should I be nervous?”
“No, no, no. It’s just..maybe a bit of a weird question.”
“Nico. I deal with kids on a daily basis. And other residents who have no sense of boundaries. And Jack and Luke where all social cues are nonexistent. Almost nothing fazes me at this point.”
“Well, of course I’ve seen you around Jack and Luke so I know what your relationship is like with them. But how are you with Quinn?”
“Huh. Why do you ask?”
Nico twirls a piece of her hair around his finger. “They’ve mentioned a couple of times how I remind them of Quinn sometimes, which you know, I think is a compliment. I respect Quinn a lot as a player and he did a great job captaining that team this year. But, I don’t know. I’m just curious.”
Clementine smiles easily. “Luke’s my baby and Jack’s like the most annoying little brother you could ask for, but yeah. Quinn is..he’s also like a little brother, but he’s also my best friend. I think Quinn and I are the most similar in terms of how we think. So I guess that leads to a sense of…understanding? Like, on a different level than with Luke and Jack. And if you think I’m protective of Jack and Luke, I’m probably even worse with Quinn. He’s just always so busy looking after the other two that he sometimes forgets he needs to look out for himself too.”
“Then who looks after you?”
“Hm?”
“If you’re busy looking after those three, who looks after you?”
She sits up as he lets her hair fall from his fingers. She plops a strawberry in his mouth. “I don’t need anyone to look after me.”
“Those three don’t need anyone to look after them.” He points out.
“Lies. You think Luke and Jack are annoying now? They were ten times worse before. And you think Luca and Nina don’t still feel a responsibility to look after their little brother? I haven’t even met them and I think I know the answer.” She shrugs, hooking her chin on his shoulder. “I don’t mind, really. They also, in a way, look after me as well, especially as we’ve gotten older. But I don’t think I answered your question. I guess you’ll have to see Quinny and I together and see for yourself.”
He hums, kissing her forehead twice. “You gotta take some time to look after yourself too. You’re no use to them if you don’t.”
“I know. I think I’ve managed the balance well. And you’re partially right. I don’t need to look after them as much anymore, especially since now Quinny has a girlfriend who I still haven’t met and you look after Jack and Luke plenty.”
Nico snorts. “I’m sure you’ll get to meet Quinn’s girlfriend this summer.”
“If the fucker answered my calls, that would be a start,” she says. “Are you all packed to go yet?”
“Not at all.”
He literally leaves in two days. “God, you all really are the same breed. I bet I could pack all your shit in an hour. Maybe even less.”
He smirks. “Is that a challenge?”
“No. Pack your own stuff. You’re a grown man.”
He laughs, and they switch positions. Now his head is in her lap and she’s running her hand through his hair. She’s still learning things about Nico, but she’s pretty sure that he likes her playing with his hair more than she likes him playing with hers. He clears his throat. “And, um, I don’t need to pack yet. I’m staying in Jersey a bit longer.”
“Yeah? How much longer?”
“Like, June 7? So what is that..three weeks?”
She blinks. “Nico, I don’t-”
“This has nothing to do with you,” he says, before grimacing. “That’s not what I mean. It actually has a lot to do with you. But it was my choice. I’m in no rush to get back, in terms of training and all that. Plus, a bunch of the guys are staying for a bit too. And I want to spend time with you, because I do have…what did you say? ‘Impeccably shit timing.’”
“I just want to make it clear that you don’t have to stay just for me,” she assures softly. “I know you miss home and I understand the importance of an off season.”
He looks up at her earnestly, “Spending time with you is also important to me.”
Her heart soars as she traces his lips with her thumb. He catches her hand and kisses her knuckles. “Well, I’m not gonna complain about that.”
The rooftop bar that night is a fun time, even if she feels very much out of her tax bracket. She chats with pretty much everyone, much more comfortable than she was at the start of the season. People egg her on to share childhood stories of Jack and Luke, which she has plenty of. And even if they both groan and act embarrassed, she knows they love it. The drinks are plentiful and she likes seeing everyone let loose the way they can’t during the season. She’s sure the team is still disappointed from their season to some extent, so it’s nice to see them all smile and laugh and generally have a good time.
At some point in the night, she’s sitting by herself for some space, admiring the skyline with a ginger ale in her hands, taking a break from the alcohol she’s consumed tonight.
“Social butterfly finally tired out?”
She looks up to see Jack, cheeks flushed and hair adorably tousled, staring down at her. She scooches over to offer him a seat. “A bit. It just hit me that I’m running on four hours of sleep.”
He snorts, sitting down. “Yeah, that’ll do it.” He tucks himself into her side like he used to do as a kid, taking her arm and using it as a pillow. “We still on for dinner tomorrow? Just me, you and Lukey?”
“Of course. I gotta get my fix in before you all leave me to hang with all your friends.”
Jack shoves her lightly. “We’re literally staying in Jersey until the end of the month. Or the Northeast, at least.”
“Okay, and Trevor literally flies in in two days. And then you and Luke’s friends are gonna rotate in and out. I’ll be lucky if I get a second of quiet at the apartment.”
Jack laughs, but then a worried look crosses his face. “I told them that under no circumstance can they enter your room without your permission. I don’t want them being here to fuck up your schedule.”
She waves him off. “It’s fine, Jack. I promise. Besides, I’ll just hide out at Nico’s if I need. Did he tell you that he’s staying a bit longer?”
His smirks. “He did. Mom invited him to spend the long weekend with us up in New Hampshire.”
“He didn’t mention that.”
“Probably because I literally just told him an hour ago when Mom texted me. You know this means he’s gonna be meeting Maeve, right?”
She blinks. “Shit, yeah. A bit soon, no?”
To her surprise, instead of agreeing or making fun of her, Jack just shrugs. “I don’t think so. You and Nico are the real deal.”
Her mouth drops open a bit in shock. “Oh.”
Jack just shoots her an award-winning grin. “And Maeve is gonna love him.”
That, Clementine thinks, is most definitely true,
As they drive home, she’s in the passenger seat with Luke and Jack in the back, quietly dozing off. Nico’s hand is on her thigh as she’s queuing songs up on her phone. Even after living in the city for almost a year now, she still finds herself in awe at the NYC skyline, especially on the rare chance she gets to see it from the angle of leaving the city in a car this late. Her attention is brought elsewhere when she feels a squeeze on her thigh. She looks at Nico and smiles.
(It’s hard to not smile when she looks at Nico)
“You have fun?” He asks softly, careful not to disturb the brothers in the back.
“Lots,” she responds. “Thanks for having me.”
“Of course,” he says. “I think there would have been an uproar if you hadn’t come. Everyone loves having you around.”
“Jack told me you’re invited to Memorial Day weekend celebrations in New Hampshire.”
“Yeah. It was sweet of Ellen to invite me. It’ll be fun to experience a classic summer weekend out here.” He suddenly looks at her, worried. “That’s okay, right? I don’t wanna intrude.”
“What? Of course it’s fine. It’s gonna be a chill weekend with good food and a lot of sun. You know you’re gonna be meeting my mom, right?”
“Is that a problem? Moms usually like me. Ellen likes me, I think.”
Clementine rolls her eyes. “No, I just, as long as you know.”
Nico looks over at her. “Your mom’s clearly important to you and raised a beautiful woman. I’m excited to meet her.” She swallows roughly. Nico changes topics easily. “Have you figured out your plans for the summer? How much vacation time do you have?”
“Not much. Maybe, like, two weeks at most. I’m still trying to figure it out. The boys invited me to Michigan, which would be fun. I haven’t been back there for a bit. Some of my friends from med school are going to meet back up in California at some point.”
“Two very different options.”
“Yeah. I probably need to figure it out soon though so I can request the leave.”
“Have you thought about Switzerland?”
She’s looking out her window, so she doesn’t see the hesitant but honest look on his face. “Showing me your hometown already, Cap?” She jokes
“If you want.” She whips her head to look at him. Oh. He’s serious. He backtracks. “I-I get if you think it’s too soon, but you’ve mentioned that you wanna go back. And I could show you around. Or we could go to other places in Europe too. I-I feel bad that I’m about to leave when we haven’t gotten quality time together which I know is partially my fault-”
She pushes her chin into his arm, looking up at him as he briefly looks down at her before focusing back on the road. “You’d be okay with that? Me coming to your hometown?”
“Why wouldn’t I be?”
“We just started dating officially..what, like a month ago? Not even?” She looks to the backseat to ensure that Jack and Luke are still asleep, or are at least faking it to give them some sort of privacy. They are. She turns back around. “I don’t…I just don’t want you to feel like you- I-you’re really important to me,” she admits with a swallow. “I don’t wanna mess it up by moving too fast.”
“You’re not messing anything up,” Nico takes her hand and kisses the back of it. “I’m not gonna push you. It’s ultimately your decision. But I would absolutely love to show you around where I grew up and spend more time together.”
“Can I think about it?”
“Of course,” he assures. “Take all the time you need.”
She leans to kiss his cheek.
…..
“Switzerland?” Luke practically screeches. “To introduce you to his family?”
Clementine rolls her eyes, sliding him a glass of orange juice across the counter. Trevor giggles into his coffee and without looking, she smacks the back of his head.
“Switzerland because it’s beautiful and to spend time with my boyfriend,” Clementine says pointedly.
“Go frolic in Europe with your new boyfriend,” Trevor grins. “You deserve it. Jacky tells me you’re barely home.”
“I’m trying to become a doctor, Trev. I signed up for not having a life.”
“Exactly, which is an even better reason to go visit your hot boyfriend in Europe.” Jack and Luke give their old friend a weird look. Trevor just shrugs. “What? Your captain’s a good looking guy, and you’re delusional if you think differently.”
“I don’t care if Nico is the hottest person in the world. He’s kissing my sister. I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to that.” Luke says with a wrinkled nose.
Jack chuckles, ruffling his little brother’s hair. “Well, get used to it, Moose. And it’s kinda our fault. I mean, we’re the ones who wanted this all season. It’s fucking hilarious that they decided to start a relationship when they did though.” He comes up behind Clementine and pokes her side, rinsing his plate before putting it in the dishwasher. “Z’s right. You should go. Even if that means you wouldn’t be able to come to Michigan.”
“Aw, Clemmy’s missing the Michigan trip again?” Trevor whines. “Nevermind. Fuck your boyfriend.”
“I haven’t been to Michigan in three years so I don’t know what you’re whining about,” Clementine snorts. “And you can’t get rid of me that quickly. Especially because I, you know, live here and y’all are going to be around for who knows how long.” She taps Trevor’s phone on the counter to check the time. “Alright, I gotta head to the hospital. See you guys later.”
“Bye!”
“Love you.”
“See you tonight? What time will you be back?”
“11? Midnight the latest,” she grabs her pasta salad lunch from the fridge into her tote bag. “Have fun. Call if you need me. The usual.”
“Be safe,” Jack calls out. She clicks the door shut.
Her phone buzzes in her hand. She laughs out loud.
Quinny Hughes
Heard you’re going to Switzerland?
She rolls her eyes. It’s nice to know the brothers’ group chat is still as active and rapid as ever.
Clementine Sandoval
all three of you are actually the worst
and i’m older than all of you don’t be trying to parent me
Quinny Hughes
So you are going.
At least get us some good chocolate then.
Clementine Sandoval
lol i miss you
did you ever figure out if you’re coming to nh for memorial day?
it’s literally in two days i hope you have an answer
Quinny Hughes
Yeah I am. Especially now that you aren’t coming to Michigan this summer. Jack and Luke get to see you all the time it’s my turn.
And I’ll get to interrogate your new boyfriend.
Clementine Sandoval
sigh
are you at least bringing lauren
Quinny Hughes
Yup.
Clementine Sandoval
fantastic
finally another fucking girl
Quinny Hughes
Lol. See you soon❤️
Clementine smiles before starting her car.
…..
Two days later, Jack, Luke, Trevor, Nico and Clementine pile into Jack’s car to head up to the Hughes family’s lakehouse to spend the long weekend. She lets Luke have the passenger seat because it’s a five hour drive and he has the longest legs. Additionally, she finds great amusement in seeing Nico and Trevor interact and getting to sit in the middle of them and put her head on Nico’s shoulder and her legs over Trevor’s lap. Though, with Trevor’s constant yapping, Nico’s surprisingly unhinged stories, Jack’s loud laughter and Luke’s tendency to make a comment on everything, the drive goes by so damn slow that by the time they roll into the driveway, Clementine is practically shoving Trevor to get out of the car.
At the front door, Ellen’s laughing and Clementine rushes over to her second mother to give her a big hug.
Ellen rocks her back and forth. “It’s so good to see you, my girl.”
“You literally saw her three weeks ago?” Jack says, coming up behind them.
“Hide your jealousy better, Jacky,” Clementine teases. “It’s always good to see you, Ellen.” Jim comes up behind his wife and she beams. “Hi Jimmy!”
He laughs, wrapping her in a fatherly hug. “Hi Sunshine. El made sangria for everyone, and it’s still cold.”
Clementine lights up. “Oh amazing. I’ll grab a glass after I get my stuff.” She turns around to see Nico coming up the stairs with both his and her bags in his hands.
A knowing smile appears on Jim’s face. “Think that’s already covered.” She rushes to help him out but Nico just swats her away. Jim nods at Nico. “Good to see you again, Nico.”
“Good to see you too, Mr. Hughes,” he puts his bags down to shake Jim’s hand and hug Ellen, as Jack, Luke and Trevor clamber into the house. “Thank you both so much for having me.”
“Anytime, Nico!” Ellen beams. “And please, call us by our first names. You’re family, especially after recent developments.”
Clementine rolls her eyes as Nico immediately becomes flustered. “Really? Mom’s not even here yet.”
“Oh can you blame me, Clementine? Now I don’t have to hear Jack and Luke whine about when their sister and captain are going to get together.” Ellen says. “But I’ll be cool for now. Why don’t you show Nico up to your room and drop all your stuff off? Your mom picked up Quinn and Lauren from Logan and should be here any minute. Boys!” She calls out and Jack, Luke and Trevor magically appear and Clementine rolls her eyes. “Take your stuff up to your rooms so no one trips over your things. Trevor and Jack, you’re sharing.”
Trevor turns to Jack with a kissy face and Jack grimaces. “You and me, Jacky boy! Just like old times.”
“Get the fuck away from me,” Jack says dryly as Luke chuckles. Jack glares at his younger brother. “How come you get a solo room?”
“Because Quinn and Lauren are getting the other room.”
“And where is Maeve staying?”
“Probably in the basement so she doesn’t have to deal with all you guys.” Clementine retorts.
Jack turns to his parents. “You’re letting Clee and Nico share a room? And Quinn and Lauren?”
“We’re adults, you know?” Clementine sighs, pinching her nose. “You guys are exhausting. Move out of my way so we can get through.” She hears Nico stifle a laugh as they reluctantly clear a pathway. “Somehow they’re even more annoying during off-season than during the season,” she says as they climb up the stairs.
“It’s fine,” Nico chuckles. “It’s nice. The chaos, I mean. Tells a lot about who you are.”
“Don’t associate me with those fools,” Clementine says with no heat as she pushes open the door to the room in this house that’s always been designated as hers. “Here we are.”
Nico puts the bags down and immediately scans some of the photos framed on the wall. He ‘aww’s and she turns around to find him staring at the one of her and the boys during her UCLA graduation. “You guys are such babies here.”
“A week before Jack got drafted,” Clementine recalls fondly. “The boys surprised me. I didn’t think they were gonna come because they had so much hockey stuff going on.”
“You went to all their drafts, right?” Nico says. Clementine nods. “So of course they were there during one of your biggest moments.” Nico points to another photo of both families when they were all at this exact lake house. Her dad’s in this one. “When was this taken?”
“2013.” Clementine smiles sadly. “It was the last summer my dad came here. I know it’s one of Ellen’s favorites. Mine too.”
Nico hums, kissing her temple gently before scanning the rest of the room. It’s mostly white with some rustic elements, splashes of tan and ocean blue in the comforter and the sparse decorations. “Would I be right in assuming that this room hasn’t changed much since you were young?”
“It’s definitely cleaner,” Clementine laughs. “I know Jim and El use it as a guest room, but whenever I get the chance to come back, they say it’s mine.” There’s the sound of the front door opening and a cacophony of greetings floating through the room. She turns her body towards him and looks up at him. “Are you sure about this?”
“Well, even if I wasn’t, it’s a bit too late now, isn’t it?” He says. She pokes him in the side. He leans down to gently peck her lips twice. “Why are you so nervous? Shouldn’t I be the one who’s nervous?”
She chuckles. “Yeah, yeah. You’re right. Let’s go down.”
They walk down the stairs, Nico close behind her but not quite touching her. Clementine beams as she watches her mom hug Luke and put her hands on his cheeks before greeting Jack in the same way. She knows her mom doesn’t ever miss seeing the Devils or the Canucks when they’re playing the Bruins in Boston, but that only totals to usually only three games a season.
Clementine thinks a lot about how she sees Jim and Ellen as her parents. It’s during these moments does she remember that the boys see her mom the exact same way.
Maeve’s eyes flit up to the stairs and she raises an eyebrow. “My beautiful daughter. You look exhausted.”
Clementine snorts. “Thanks, Mom.” She descends down the last step and hugs her mother tightly, breathing in the scent that has comforted her on the best and worst days. She catches Quinn’s eye over Maeve’s shoulder as Trevor is chatting in his ear and she can’t help but grin.
Maeve pulls away and eyes Nico, a half smile on her face. “And you must be the infamous Nico.”
Nico chuckles, eyes widening momentarily as Maeve pulls him into a hearty hug. “It’s nice to meet you, Mrs. Sandoval.”
Maeve lets out an affronted noise. “None of that. Call me Maeve. You European boys and your politeness.” Clementine laughs under her breath. “It’s so nice to meet you! My daughter hasn’t mentioned how handsome you are.”
“Probably because she’s the one carrying in the looks department of the relationship.” Nico grins charmingly and Clementine feels so fucking fond.
She then begins to leave her boyfriend and her mom to converse and turns to Quinn. Time with Quinn is always scarce. She leans up to wrap her arms around his neck. “Hey Q.”
“Hey Clem.”
Clementine turns to the beautiful girl next to him. “And you must be Lauren. It’s nice to finally meet you.” She also pulls the girl into a hug. “Quinn’s been keeping you away from me.”
Quinn shoots his older sister a dirty look. “That’s not true. It’s not my fault you don’t live in California any more.”
“It’s nice to meet you too,” Lauren says softly. “Quinn’s told me so much about you. I love your pants.”
Clementine looks down at her cream flowy pants with a wide smile. “Oh thank you! You’re gorgeous. How in the world did Quinn land you?”
Lauren laughs as Quinn groans. “Clem.”
“I’m kidding!” She ruffles his hair. “Damn, let me have my fun. I don’t get to do this often. And don’t pretend that you’re not about to grill Nico this entire weekend.”
“She’s got you there,” Lauren says with a laugh.
Trevor comes up inbetween the girls. “Have you met this one yet?” Clementine asks.
Lauren nods. “I have. Kinda. Hi Trevor. Quinn’s also told me a lot about you.”
Trevor’s eyes widen as he pulls Lauren into a side hug. “Never listen to anything Quinn says about me. He’s mean to me.”
“You guys are all mean to each other,” Clementine rolls her eyes. “I don’t know what point you’re trying to make.”
Maeve claps her hands. “Out of the doorway and into the backyard, everyone! El made sangria and it’s too nice to be inside.” She picks up her bags but is swatted away by Luke, who takes the bags from her hands. Maeve kisses him on the cheek. “Thanks, honey.”
Jack rolls his eyes as they all start walking towards the kitchen. “We get it, Maeve. Luke is your favorite.” Ellen gives him a warning look as Quinn snorts.
“You know,” Maeve starts. “I was about to tell you how glad I am to see you. But with that comment, I’ll abstain.” Jack pouts and Maeve rolls her eyes but messes up his hair fondly.
Nico places his hand on Clementine’s back and leans down to mutter in her ear. “I see where you get your sass from.”
Clementine chuckles under her breath. “You gotta have some sass to deal with them. My mom’s the blueprint.”
Everyone grabs a glass of sangria before they migrate outside. Clementine finds herself sitting in between Lauren and Luke, Nico sitting by her legs with everyone else in various chairs or on the grass in some sort of circle. Clementine automatically carding her fingers though Nico’s hair as she speaks to Lauren and Quinn. She still can’t believe they’ve been dating for over a year and she’s only met Lauren now.
If she was still in California, she would’ve flown her ass to Vancouver and parked herself at Quinn’s apartment at the first chance she had.
While she’s listening in on a conversation between Nico, Quinn and Trevor, she catches both her mom and Ellen’s eyes on her. She narrows her eyes. She sees her mom not-so-subtly eyeing her hand in Nico’s hair and him leaning back against her legs.
Jack notices, looking between the two of them with a smirk. “Thoughts, Maeve?”
“Jack,” Clementine says in a warning tone. Nico squeezes her ankle in reassurance.
“I didn’t even say anything!”
Maeve chuckles, and Clementine sees her smile, the same smile that everyone says she also has. “Nothing in particular. Just thinking about how fun your time in Jersey has probably been so far.”
Clementine bites her lip, closed lipped-smile threatening to burst through the seams. “It could be worse.”
As expected, Jack rolls his eyes and Luke gives her a dirty look. “Well, what could make it better?” Luke asks.
“If you guys cooked more for me.”
Quinn looks at his brothers with a disapproving look. “You’re making Clem cook for all of you? Guys, come on. She’s busier than all of us combined.”
Jack’s jaw drops wide open as Trevor cackles. “That’s not even true! We cook for you. Just not as much because you’re just a better cook. And you always have leftovers.” Jack reaches over to whack Clementine’s shoulder. “Stop making us look like bad roommates.”
Clementine chuckles to herself. She has a lot of favorite things in life, but making fun of her brothers and throwing them under the bus has to be at the top.
Nico looks up at her and she has to stop herself from leaning down and kissing him silly. “That cake you baked me for my birthday is still the best dessert I’ve had in awhile.”
She rolls her eyes. “You’re just being nice. And, I baked another one for Jack and Luke, which circles back to my point.”
Ellen starts lightly scolding her two youngest for not cooking more and Clementine snickers as she feels Nico’s shoulders shake as he’s trying to hold back his laugh. She drops his hands from his hair and instead leans forward, wrapping her arms loosely around his neck. He automatically grabs her wrists and keeps his hands there. She places a quick kiss to the side of his head.
(Without their knowledge, Maeve catches the romantic motion. She doesn’t even bother to hide her smile.)
It’s not the first time she’s seen Nico around the people she loves, but that whole weekend, she watches him and her mom get along so well, him offer to help out Ellen and Jim for meals, him shove Trevor into the lake when he’s being an absolute pest, him sitting down with Quinn by the fire one night a bit away from everyone to talk about something that neither Quinn or Nico will tell her about so she knows it’s about her.
He slips so easily into the most important part of her life. Clementine doesn’t quite love him yet, but she’s real close.
Their last night, as they’re getting ready to sleep, Clementine's just staring at Nico from her bed as he’s in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He catches her eye in the mirror and smiles, but toothpaste dribbles down his chins causing him to curse and her to laugh.
When he climbs under the covers, she places her head on his chest. “Thanks.”
“For?”
“Coming here. I’m sure it’s a lot.”
“It’s not,” he assures gently. “Why would it be?”
She shrugs, because he’s right, in a sense. “Families are always a lot, no matter how good they are. And I know Quinn and Jimmy grilled you way more than necessary.”
“Baby,” he rubs up and down her arm. “I knew that was gonna happen as soon as I was invited here. They were more than fine. Jack and Luke’s threats were way worse.”
“They’re annoying.”
“They love you,” he says. “And they’re protective of you. I get it. I’m the same way with Nina.”
She shifts so she’s eye level with him. “About that…”
“Hm?”
“I got the okay from my supervisors to take two weeks off.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Can I still come to see you in Switzerland?” She asks, biting her lip, nervous all of a sudden.
Nico kisses her soundly. “Of course,” he mutters against her lips. “Yes. When?”
“I was thinking early July?”
“To spend your birthday?”
“If you’ll have me.”
He squeezes her exaggeratingly, making her giggle. “You’re silly. Of course. Is there anywhere you really wanna go?”
“I mean, I’ll go anywhere.”
“I can take you all around Switzerland. Give you the grand tour.”
“That sounds perfect,” she swallows before bringing up something that’s very important to her. “I’m paying half.”
Nico counters back immediately. “One third.”
She scoffs. She was prepared for this disagreement. “Half.”
“Hey,” he kisses the top of her head. “You’re coming to see me. The least I can do is handle all of that.”
“You’re housing me and taking me around. I’m paying for half.”
“Nope.”
“Nico. I am perfectly capable of paying for myself.”
“You pay for your own plane tickets and I got the rest.”
“I pay for my own plane tickets and meals and then you got the rest.”
“Schätzli. Let me take care of it, yeah? I want to. And I’m perfectly capable of doing so.”
“I don’t want you to think I’m a gold digger,” Clementine says with a bit of a whine, making Nico snort.
“I know you’re not a gold digger. If you were, you’d actually let Jack pay for you more. You know he makes more than I do, right?”
“Weird flex.”
“You pay for your plane tickets and some meals,” he compromises. “Save the rest up for something else. Buy Luke a new suit for his birthday or something.”
She chuckles. “He does need one.”
“Exactly.”
Clementine lets out relenting a sigh. She’ll just have to sneak her card in here or there. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yeah. I just really don’t want you to think I’m mooching off you or anything.”
“I’ve never thought of it like that at all, I promise,” he assures. She settles back against his chest again. “I’m so excited for you to come.”
“I hope your family doesn’t hate me.”
“They won’t.” And he says it so confidently that she has to believe him. “No one could hate you. Besides, Nina’s been dying to meet you and Luca wants to know the ‘girl who’s voluntarily dealing with my shit.’”
She laughs, turning to shut off the lamp. “Still. You’re their baby brother.”
He pouts. “I’m not a baby.”
She rolls her eyes. “I’m convinced.” She yawns, tossing a blanket over them both. “We should sleep. Gotta have energy to deal with the hooligans in the car tomorrow.”
He laughs, kissing her forehead. “Goodnight.”
*****
Clementine offers to drive Nico to the airport before she goes to the hospital, even though he tries to vehemently fight her on it. Clementine ultimately wins the argument, wanting to spend as much time as possible before he leaves.
“It’s only a month,” she reminds him as she kills the engine at the curbside of the departure terminal at Newark Liberty International Airport, biting her lip to also assure herself.
He leans over the console to kiss her sweetly. “I know,” he murmurs against her lips. “That’s a long time though.”
She runs a hand through his hair. He leans into it instinctively. “I’ll be there with you before you know it. You’ll be having too much fun catching up with family and friends to even think about me.”
“Not true.” She rolls her eyes with a smile as they both climb out of the car. Nico finishes unloading his luggage from the trunk as he carries it to the curb. Clementine’s amazed that no one has yelled at them for parking by the curbside too long yet.
She wraps her arms around his neck and hugs him tightly, leaning her head on his chest and breathing in deeply, trying to memorize his scent. “I’ll miss you.”
“I miss you already,” he mutters into her hair. “I’ll call.”
“You fucking better,” she shoots back with no bite. “Have fun, okay? Enjoy your time off.”
He kisses her one more time, which turns into three more times. Clementine bites her lower lip as he backs away to try not to cry. He brushes his thumb against her cheek. “I’ll see you soon, yeah?”
She nods with a shaky smile. “Yeah. Text me before you take off.”
“Of course.” He clasps his hand on his suitcase handles and backs away with a sweet smile. “Bye, baby.”
After he walks through the doors, she promptly drives herself to the train station, music playing louder than normal to hopefully drown out her own loud thoughts. She parks to see a text from Nico saying that he’s at the gate, a horribly-angled selfie of him and a coffee he must’ve bought.
Clementine saves it.
…..
It’s only been eleven days since Nico flew back to Switzerland. They text everyday and FaceTime when the time differences allow. She always wakes up to a good morning text and a mini photo dump of pictures he’s taken that day. Sometimes they’re of the beautiful sights of Bern or Naters or wherever he is. Sometimes they’re literally just a picture of his toast for breakfast. But they’re nice to receive. And at his urging, she sends similar photo dumps back. His favorites are the selfies she takes at work. Bonus points if she’s wearing the scrubs he got her for Christmas.
She goes to the hospital. She spends sporadic time with Quinn, Jack, Luke and other stragglers who show up at the apartment before they all head back to Michigan or wherever else. Nico relaxes with his friends and family.
She misses him like a limb.
…..
Clementine’s phone rings as she’s sipping on her coffee while sitting at a cafe by the hospital. She raises an eyebrow when she sees who’s calling.
“Quinn. Hey.”
“Hi Clem. Are you busy?”
“You have me for about 15 minutes. What’s up?” She hears a sniffle and immediately she sits up straighter. “Quinny? Is everything okay?”
“Lauren and I broke up.”
She squeezes her eyes shut. “Fuck. Oh Quinn, I’m so sorry. When did this happen?”
“Earlier this morning. She-she called it off. Over the phone.”
“Over the phone?” Clementine tries to level her voice and judgment. “Wasn’t she just in Michigan?”
“She left last week.”
“Fuck, Quinn. How are you feeling?”
“I just, I’m just really sad, I guess. And a bit confused.” She gives him a moment to think. “I know she was voicing concerns about the distance and stuff, but we had talked about it and I thought we had come to a conclusion. I guess we left that conversation feeling very differently.”
Clementine picks at her nails, “What was her reasoning? Did she have any?”
“She said the distance wasn’t worth it anymore.” Quinn trails off and Clementine puts it together, her heart breaking for him as she finishes the thought for him.
That Quinn wasn’t worth it anymore.
Clementine grinds her teeth together. “Fuck her,” she says. “I know that’s not what you want to hear right now, but I’m serious. What the fuck? She just suddenly decided that after dating for over a year that she couldn’t do it anymore?”
“Yeah. I’m confused about that too. When she was talking and explaining her reasoning over the phone I was just, like, shell-shocked. I think I froze. She was bringing up things that she hadn’t ever brought up before and I don’t know, it just felt like she had made the decision to break up with me before I even picked up the phone. It wouldn’t have mattered what I said.”
“That’s shitty, Quinny. How unfair.”
“I mean,” she knows he’s shrugging on the other side of the phone. She wishes she could hug him. “I know I wasn’t the perfect boyfriend and there were underlying issues, but I-I tried my best.”
“I know, Quinn. I know,” Clementine sighs. How do you comfort one of your best friends through heartbreak when you can’t actually be there? “Q, I’m so sorry. I have to head back to work, but I’ll call you tonight, okay?”
“Oh. That’s okay. You don’t have to. Thanks for listening anyways.”
“I’ll call you back tonight. I promise. I love you. Hang in there.”
“Thanks, Clem. Love you too.”
Clementine manages to do one thing she does very well, which is push something out of her mind and focus on the task at hand. The second she clocks out of the hospital, on her commute back to Hoboken, she thinks through how she wants to talk this through with Quinn. It’s not her first time talking someone through a break-up, so she’s learned a few tricks and phrases here and there. Like most things, it just comes with repetition.
But this is also Quinn. Her best friend. All her previous experience might not work and might not even matter.
She calls him as soon as she finishes her shower. She lets him talk for over two hours to the point where she has to adjust her position on the couch to be near an outlet so her phone can charge.
There’s nothing really to say in a situation like this, as Quinn details what sounds a lot like heartbreak. She wishes she was in Michigan and could give him the tightest hug. Watching and hearing his sniffles through the phone has her throat closing up and all she can do is listen.
But as she climbs into her bed that night, she lets out a breath. She’s sure it hurts so much now, but Quinn will find a way.
He always does.
…..
Clementine’s phone reads 6:28 a.m. local time when she lands in Zurich. She yawns as she watches the plane taxi to their gate, Taylor Swift’s “august” playing softly in her ears. Somehow, the two seats next to her were empty so she had her own row the whole flight, meaning she got to go up and pee without bothering a single person.
She turns on her phone, and texts the chat with the Hughes / Sandoval families that she’s landed, before thumbing over to her thread with Nico. He sent a text eight minutes ago.
Nico Hischier
At the arrivals area. Can’t wait to see you ❤️
Clementine Sandoval
just landed!!! can’t wait to squeeze you
Immigration and customs goes quickly, even if Clementine finds herself tapping her foot in line. She can already feel the heat of the Switzerland summer air seeping into her skin and she tugs off her sweatshirt, happy that she has a t-shirt underneath. Once she grabs her luggage from the carousel, she takes a deep breath, wheeling her suitcase through to the arrivals hall. Her eyes dart around to try and spot her boyfriend. It doesn’t take long.
The grin spreads on her face when she sees Nico. He’s wearing an olive green t-shirt that’s seen better days and dark jeans topped off with those scuffed up Nikes that he always seems to wear.
He’s holding a bouquet of wildflowers wrapped in newspaper, the sweetest smile peeking over. Clementine feels her heart threatening to burst out of her chest.
She almost knocks her suitcase over as she throws her arms around him. She feels him chuckle and place a kiss on the side of her head. “Hi Schätzli,” he says softly.
“Hi,” she pulls back and kisses him. But they’re both grinning too much to kiss properly. She holds his cheeks in her hand, happy to just be around him after a month. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you more,” he grins. “You look so beautiful.”
Clementine snorts because her Stanford t-shirt tied with her hair tie in the front and the black leggings with her Adidas definitely scream ‘I’ve been on a transatlantic flight and I need to shower.’
“I look like I just was on a plane for 8 hours,” she says dryly.
“Beautiful,” Nico says firmly as he takes the backpack off her shoulders and grabs her suitcase, giving her the flowers to hold. “For you”
She sniffs the flowers and smiles. “Thank you. You didn’t have to get me these. They’re so pretty.”
“You’re so pretty,” he replies simply. That’s twice in 30 seconds. He turns to look at her again as they walk out to the parking lot. “I’m so happy you’re here.”
“Thank you for driving all this way. I know it’s early and far.”
“Of course. I just want to see you.”
It doesn’t feel like it’s been a month as Nico starts the drive to Bern to his sister’s place where they’re staying for a few days. The sun’s high in the sky despite the early hour, and Clementine happily sips on the coffee and munches on the croissant Nico had graciously gotten her. They catch up on each other’s weeks like they have been over the phone when they’ve been almost 4,000 miles apart. They talk about the teenager who recognized Nico the other day when Nico and his friends were playing a game of pick-up soccer and how they all played until sundown and Clementine having to step in to assist in a higher than average number of surgeries the last month, as well as having to work the Fourth of July. She holds his hand the entire time and both of them can’t seem to stop the smile from spreading across their lips.
She’s here. In the most beautiful country. With the most wonderful person.
“How are you feeling?” Nico asks. “Are you really tired?”
“I’m okay.” She yawns. “Even if I am, I’m not sleeping until at least 9 tonight. I’m not wasting time here by being jetlagged and sleeping at weird times.”
Nico laughs. “Fair. But it’s okay if you’re tired for a few days. I always am.”
“No wasted time,” she says, poking his shoulder on every word.
“If you say so,” he grins. “My mom’s making a huge breakfast for us when we get back and everyone’s excited to meet you.”
Suddenly, Clementine is nervous again. “She didn’t have to do that.”
“She wanted to,” he assures. “I haven’t brought a girl back home in…ever, really. They’re probably more excited to meet you than you are to meet them.”
“No pressure at all,” she says dryly.
He looks over at her and squeezes her hand. “You’ll win them over in minutes.” Clementine hums before Nico continues. “If Jack could somehow have them all liking him in a day, you’re gonna be perfectly fine. You’re all the best parts of him and more anyways.” She reaches over to fix a strand of his hair and she wants to smirk at the light blush that paints his cheeks. He clears his throat, “I was thinking of taking it easy today, just walking around the town and exploring the area a bit. And then dinner at my favorite place in town?”
“Sounds perfect to me.”
“I can’t believe you’re here,” he says breathily. “I, just…I can’t believe it.”
She grins, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. “Well believe it, pretty boy.”
(His stomach flips at being called ‘pretty boy.’ She hasn’t said that one yet. Two months after they’ve officially started dating and he still feels like a teenage boy with the biggest crush on the prettiest girl in school)
They pull up to Nina’s place and Clementine feels like she’s in a dream. Bern is beautiful everywhere you look. It’s almost like she’s in a picture book of a fairytale. She stretches and rises on her tiptoes to kiss Nico on the cheek to thank him for grabbing her luggage. She tugs at his t-shirt and he stops to turn to her, momentarily confused. She just wrap her arms around his waist again, wanting to feel him before they’re surrounded by his family. He chuckles, rubbing her back and kissing the top of her head three times.
As they’re walking up the steps to the front door, it swings open as Katja, Nico’s mother, beams. “You guys made it! Hello!”
Clementine can’t help but smile back. “Hi,” she shifts the flowers so that she can shake Katja’s hand, but Katja doesn’t bother and just wraps her into a hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, Mrs. Hischier. Thank you so much for having me.”
“Thank you for coming all this way,” Katja’s eyes shift to Nico, who’s a few steps behind with Clementine’s luggage. “Nico tells us good things.”
She chuckles and ducks her head. “I think your son is a bit too nice to me.”
“Ignore her, Mama,” Nico says as they all walk into the house. “The only person who doesn’t know she’s the best is herself.”
There’s footsteps coming down the stairs. Clementine’s met immediately with Nina’s smile. It’s the exact same as her mother and her brother’s and she is absolutely stunning. Luca is behind his sister as well with a matching grin. And Rino, who Clementine suddenly realizes is where Nico gets so many of his facial features from, just stands to the side with a small smile.
“You’re here!” Nina exclaims. Nico says something quick in Swiss German which Nina rolls her eyes at before she pulls Clementine into a tight hug. “It’s so nice to meet you, Clementine. We’ve heard so much.”
“Yeah,” Luca echoes. “I’ve never seen Nico so excited about someone.”
Nico groans and Clementine hugs Luca with a giggle before nudging her boyfriend. “He’s not so bad either.” She turns to shake Rino’s hand. “It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Hischier. Thank you for having me.” Rino shakes her hand with a warm smile before Nico pinches her side and pulls her closer.
“Okay, breakfast is almost ready!” Katja claps her hands. “Nico, why don’t you show Clementine to your room? Luca and Nina, come help me finish up. Oh! I can take those flowers from you. Did Nico get you those?”
Clementine giggles as she hands them over. “He did.”
Katja pats Nico’s cheek in such a motherly way that it makes Clementine’s heart ache in the best way. “I did raise a sweet one.”
Nico groans. “Mama.” Clementine makes eye contact with Nina and they both burst out laughing. “Come on. You can take a quick shower and then we’ll come back down.”
Clementine shoots a quick grin at Katja, Rino, Nina and Luca before following Nico upstairs. She decides to jump into the shower quickly and rinse off, partially to wake her up, mostly to wash the grime of the plane off of her. Nico’s sitting on the bed scrolling through her phone when she comes back out, hair wet and dressed in a light sweater and linen shorts.
“The fact that there’s a window in the shower looking over the mountains is so unfair,” she says, combing her fingers through her wet hair.
Nico chuckles. “Pretty, hey?”
“Very,” she yawns. “Come on. Don’t wanna leave your family waiting.”
Breakfast is absolutely delicious and filled with warm conversation, mainly filled with the Hischier family asking Clementine questions about herself, which she happily answers inbetween way too much bread, butter and coffee. Nico tries to intercept a few times (“This isn’t an interrogation, Luca”) but she just waves him off. It’s not like she likes talking about herself, but when being surrounded by people everyday who know the ins and outs of her career, it’s refreshing to have people take interest in what she does who don’t work in the medical field at all.
After breakfast, Clementine and Nico venture into the town and Clementine is all smiles. The sun is out but it’s not too hot where she aches for shade like she does back in the US. She had changed into a dress after breakfast and doesn’t regret it, resisting the urge to twirl around the streets. It doesn’t hurt that Nico looks at her in a way that makes her giddy.
As they’re walking through the scenic old town, it’s obvious how relaxed Nico is. Away from New Jersey and the expectations that come with being the captain of the sole professional sports team from Garden State, Nico looks like every other guy in his mid twenties. It’s not like he isn’t happy in New Jersey, but there’s something freeing in the way he walks, his shoulders free from the weight he carries during the season.
They walk in the sun leisurely, stop by a few shops that look interesting to Clementine and grab coffee and pastries from a cafe that Nico apparently frequents often, judging by how friendly he is with the staff. She hasn’t really gotten to hear Nico speak his native language that often so she enjoys hearing him switch so effortlessly.
“You look happy,” Nico comments as they’re taking a break and sitting on a bench to people watch.
She tears her eyes away from an adorable family to meet Nico’s warm, brown eyes. “Do I?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, I am. Are you?”
He presses a kiss to her temple and she leans her cheek against his shoulder. “Very much so.”
“Did I pass the test?” She teases. “Your family doesn't hate me?”
“Stop,” he says with a smile. “They love you. I can tell. I think my mom fell in love with you the second you talked about growing up with the boys.”
“Really?”
“She has a soft spot for sibling relationships. She always tells us how she’s glad me, Luca and Nina get along so well.”
“They’re great, by the way, your family,” she says. “Much less chaotic than mine, which is definitely a good thing. But really, really cool. I…” She trails off at the sight of a stray soccer ball.
Nico’s eyebrows furrow before he follows her eyeline. He chuckles and gets up, holding out a hand for her. “Come on. Let’s do some passing.”
She lights up at the idea of passing around a ball with the mountains in the background on a fairly large, grassy area. The most picturesque image you could find, she thinks. She takes his hand and scurries over, getting her feet familiar with the ball as he backs away a few feet.
They start some basic passing as they’re mindful of the fact that she’s wearing a dress. Clementine never saw soccer as more than a form of exercise in her youth, but she sometimes wishes she had time to join a rec league or something of that level in college and afterwards. The few people she keeps in touch with still in Toronto are mostly thanks to her club soccer days.
She’s definitely rusty, but it’s good to go through the familiar motions again. She wrinkles her nose when Nico pulls off an impressive move. “This is unfair. Are you good at every sport?”
He just shrugs modestly, before passing the ball back to her. “I definitely don’t look at ease with this ball on my feet like you do. How long did you play for?”
“Like, over 10 years?” She executes some footwork and smiles in satisfaction. “Played pretty intensely all the way up until I was 18.”
“I can tell,” he smiles. “My dad would be impressed.”
She snorts. “Don’t be ridiculous. I was never good enough to play at the collegiate level, much less professional.”
“It’s interesting that you do that.”
She stops the ball with her foot. “Do what?”
“Downplay your achievements.”
Clementine blinks a few times. “What do you mean?” But she knows exactly what he means.
Nico lets out a light snort, “You know what I mean. You’re probably the smartest and most interesting and talented person I’ve ever met. Even when you were talking to my family about your residency, you were talking about it like it isn’t a big deal. But it is a big deal. And it’s really fucking cool. And you’re so smart and quick and…I don’t know. I wish you would show off more, even though I know that’s not your style.”
She smirks. “You want me to show off?” Without waiting for an answer, she concentrates on the ball at her feet and looks up at the goal. She dribbles the ball a few seconds before striking it in the top right corner. She huffs, satisfied that she didn’t whiff it, laughing as Nico tackles her and lifts her up in a hug.
The next two days are spent in Bern, as Clementine fights the jetlag while her camera roll fills up. The Hischier siblings bring her around and she just soaks up the sunshine, views, and attractions. She especially loves flowing down the river on boats like the most seamless lazy river that just runs through the city, because you can’t really get that in the US. Nico continues bringing her around to his favorite hidden spots and to his favorite shops and restaurants, all with his hand in hers and the most beautiful smile on his face.
After Clementine says goodbye to Katja and Rino, the four of them take two cars to Zurich, Luca and Nina staying with friends while her and Nico rent out their own place. They arrive at a beautiful, spacious apartment that overlooks the center of Zurich. Clementine’s birthday is tomorrow and she has no idea what the plan is because she trusted Nico when he said he would handle it, but she’s a planner, so she can’t help but bring it up as they’re relaxing before heading out for dinner.
“Nico?”
“Yeah?” He calls out from the bathroom.
“Can you give me a hint on what we’re doing tomorrow?”
He peeks his head out of the bathroom with a smile. “I was wondering when you were gonna ask.”
She shrugs. “I trust you. But you know I’m nosy.”
Nico chuckles. “Yeah,” he comes out of the bathroom and takes his phone out of his pocket. Once unlocked, he tosses it at her. He’s lucky she has okay reflexes.
She raises an eyebrow at him before looking at his phone. Immediately, she gasps and drops the phone as it lands on the carpet on the floor. “Nico.”
“Yeah?”
“Nico,” she repeats, breathless. “You’re joking.”
“I’m not.”
“Taylor Swift? How long have you had these? How did you even get them?”
He comes over to sit on the arm of the sofa. “Nina’s a big fan. When you said you were gonna coming here for your birthday, she mentioned that Taylor Swift was gonna be in town at the same time. I pulled a few strings.”
She picks up the phone and swipes through the tickets, shellshocked. “Seven tickets?”
“Me, you, Nina, one of her friends, Luca and two of his friends. I guess they’re all kind of my friends too. I hope that’s okay?” He asks, eyebrows furrowed worriedly.
“Nico, shut up. I’m gonna see my favorite artist live and I wanna meet your friends. Of course it’s okay,” she tackles him onto the couch as he laughs. “I-I can’t believe…thank you. Oh my god.”
“Good birthday present?” He jokes.
She kisses him fondly. “I don’t know how I’m gonna beat this for yours.”
“Stop,” he murmurs, deepening the kiss. “I’m supposed to ask you if you have something to wear and if not, that you and Nina can find something tonight or tomorrow morning.”
She thinks of the light pink sequin dress she had thrown into her suitcase last minute, grateful for her past self’s decision. “I think I have something, but if I see something when we’re walking around later, I’ll let you know.” She holds his face in her hands. “Thank you. Seriously. First the whole trip and then this. I’ll pay you back for the tickets as-”
“No you won’t,” he says against her lips. She pulls back and gives him an unimpressed look. “I barely paid for them. It would be unfair to ask you to. It’s your birthday. It’s my present to you.”
Let other people do things for you for once, Clem, Quinn’s voice echoes through her head. He’s said multiple iterations of it throughout the years, but this one in particular she can envision, at dinner right after the Canucks played San Jose back in her Stanford days. That was about something simpler — arguing over who was paying for dinner — but the sentiment remains the same.
“Fine. But I’m paying for everyone’s dinner tonight.”
“Of course,” he beams.
“I mean it,” she warns.
“I know.”
She slaps his shoulder with a smile. “You fucker. I can’t believe you got those tickets.”
“27 is gonna be a good year, hey?”
She launches herself into his arms.
Yeah, it is.
…..
Clementine wakes up on her birthday to Nico pressing kisses all over her face as she squeals and wiggles around. She stretches and her arm whacks him in the face, causing him to groan. She kisses him as an apology.
“Happy birthday, honey,” he says, hovering over her with a light smile. “I can hear your bones cracking already.”
“I will push you off the bed.”
“Empty threats.”
She yawns. “How much time before everyone gets here?”
“Like, two hours? Why?”
“Perfect,” she says, pulling him closer to kiss him feverishly. He lets out a soft moan and she melts into a puddle
An hour and a half later, Clementine fiddles with the coffee maker in the kitchen as everyone starts filing in. Nina is first to bounce over and gives Clementine a big hug, wishing her a happy birthday. She meets their friends and glares at Luca as he places a large bag on the table with tissue paper peeking out of it. She doesn’t need birthday presents. But it’s sweet they thought of her anyways.
After lunch at a nearby outdoor cafe that Clementine falls in love with, everyone heads back. The guys venture out to the balcony while she, Nina and Anika, Nina’s friend, quickly make some friendship bracelets and start getting ready. Clementine’s almost done curling Nina’s hair when Nico peeks his head in, lighting up at the open box of beads on the table. He scurries in to grab the supplies and takes them outside without a word.
Anika, who’s been doing Nina’s makeup while Clementine’s been doing her hair, grins. “You two are cute together.”
“Oh, thank you.” Clementine looks up to flash a quick smile before focusing on not burning Nina or herself.
“I’ve known Nico since he was a baby,” Anika says. “Always the younger one, he was chasing us all the time. Wanted to do everything we were doing. But it was Nico and he was so sweet, so we never said no.”
Clementine chuckles. “Yeah, I get that feeling. Not that my brothers necessarily wanted to do everything I did, but they were never far behind me when we were young.”
“Right,” Anika dabs the liquid blush on Nina’s cheeks. “That’s how you and Nico met, right? Your brothers play with him in New Jersey?”
“Yeah.”
Clementine’s taken aback tone must show because Nina smiles at her through the mirror. “My brother has talked about you quite a bit since he’s come back.”
That makes Clementine look down a bit abashed. “I guess they aren’t technically my brothers,” she clarifies. “I just grew up with them.”
“So like me and Nina here.”
“Yeah. Exactly like that.”
“Do you play hockey?” Anika asks, stepping back as she finishes Nina’s makeup.
Clementine snorts, spraying hairspray into Nina’s hair. “No. You do not want to see me on skates. I played soccer. Or football, I guess.”
“But you enjoy watching it?”
The conversation momentarily pauses as Clementine is ushered into the hot seat. Nina unplugs the curler and plugs in the straightener (“I want to try something”) as Anika takes a look at Clementine’s makeup products.
“I do,” Clementine says. “Enjoy watching hockey, I mean. I don’t know if that would be the same if I wasn’t so closely connected with the sport personally, but I do enjoy it. It’s more comforting now than anything.”
“I still remember the day Nico got drafted,” Nina says wistfully. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget it.”
“And I remember everyone here staying up to watch it,” Anika adds. “There were people piling into the streets after in celebration.”
Clementine grins. “Yeah, I get that. I still remember Quinn, Jack and Luke’s draft days. It’s an extremely weird moment. Like, it’s wonderful of course, but also strange?”
“That makes sense,” Nina says. “It’s really cool to see how things have turned out since then, but it’s an interesting moment for sure. Especially when you remember Nico, or in your case, Quinn, Jack and Luke, as little boys just being little boys.”
“Nico’s really happy with you, I can tell,” Anika says. “And I don’t just say that to say that. His smile looks lighter. Freer.”
“I think that just might be because he’s home.”
“It’s because of you,” Nina says in a tone that leaves room for no argument.
When she slips into her pink dress and puts the bracelets on her wrist as they’re about to head out, it hits her what’s really about to happen. She’s about to see her favorite artist. She still remembers being gifted a CD of Taylor’s debut album from her father, Teardrops On My Guitar on repeat. After the Eras Tour sold out in seconds and the resale tickets were way too high, she lost hope on ever seeing Taylor on tour, at least this go-around.
She walks down the stairs and the first thing she sees is Nico. Dressed up in a light pink button up with khaki shorts, a backwards hat placed on his head, laughter etched in the lines on his face as he converses with his friends and siblings in his native language, she swallows. He looks up as she reaches the last step and his smile turns softer. Nina’s previous words echo her mind as she easily presses against his side.
Clementine wrinkles her nose as she looks up at him. “You really do love your hats.”
“You don’t?”
“They’re fine. I just like your hair more.” Without argument, he takes his hat off and tosses it on a nearby couch. She gives him a look but he just kisses the top of her head.
The closer they reach Letzigrund, a football stadium, Luca had said, she marvels at how large it is. She’s been to large concerts before, but as they park and make their way through the gates, she’s taken aback. Nico gently tugs their hands so she doesn’t get lost in the ground as they go find their seats. Turns out Nico pulling a few strings means tickets on the floor, not too close to the action where they would get pushed but at a vantage point where they’re in the center and can see everything. She turns to look at him bewildered and he just shrugs, a wry smile playing at his lips.
She pokes him. “Best birthday present ever.”
He takes a sip of his beer casually. “I’m glad. You know I prepared for this.”
“How?”
“I’ve been listening to Taylor Swift non-stop the last month.”
“I know we haven’t been dating for a long time, but all I do is play Taylor Swift.”
“True. But I didn’t realize how many songs she actually has. And you’re probably gonna know all of them.”
“Probably,” she admits. She’s definitely the biggest fan among the group right along with Anika. “But you don’t have to know all of them to have a good time.”
“I know. I heard she puts on a good show.” They watch Yannis, one of their friends, exchange bracelets with a stranger before Nico nudges her lightly. “I’m also just, I don’t know, excited because you’re excited.”
She snorts. “You’re a sap.”
What she wants to say, really, is “I love you.” But she refrains.
Throughout the whole concert — which in itself is a highlight of her life and something she won’t ever forget — Clementine wants to tell him she loves him. When Taylor appears in her colorful, sparkly bodysuit and sings ‘Lover’ while Nico’s arms find their way around her waist as he’s standing behind her swaying them lightly, she wants to tell him. When she, Nina and Anika loop their arms around each other screaming ‘You Belong With Me’ and he simply points his phone at them with a laugh, she wants to tell him. Right before the bridge of ‘Champagne Problems,’ when he whispers a soft “wow,” eyes glued on Taylor on stage as she sings one of Clementine’s favorite songs of hers, she wants to tell him. When he quickly leaves and comes back in the middle of ‘Delicate’ with a beer for her and a water for them to share, she wants to tell him.
When ‘Long Live’ comes on and she sees his eyes light up in recognition, before he pulls his phone out to record the end — her favorite part and the fact that he knows that is something in itself — she wants to tell him. When he and the boys scream ‘22’ so incredibly out of tune and she can’t stop laughing, she wants to tell him. When she fully loses her voice screaming out ‘Illicit Affairs’ and he can’t hide his grimace at his eardrums bursting, she wants to tell him. As they both watch Anika practically collapse when the opening notes of ‘Style’ ring out — she had come into the concert blind to the setlist somehow — and Clementine can’t help but shake her hips while singing along, she wants to tell him.
When he presses a kiss on her temple multiple times during the surprise songs as she is tearing up, she wants to tell him. When Taylor closes out the show with ‘Karma’ and Nico is visibly in awe of all the colors, fireworks, confetti and overall grand finale, she wants to tell him.
She leans into his side as they walk to their cars. She loves him. They bid farewell to everyone. She loves him. When they get back to their place, they decide to rinse off the sweat and grime together and he gently rubs massages shampoo into her hair. She loves him.
As Nico falls fast asleep next to her, arm wrapped securely around her waist, she’s about to lock her phone when she sees that she has a few text messages. They’re from Nina, who has already speedily downloaded the pictures she took on her digital camera from tonight. She thumbs through them quickly, smiling at all of them.
She stops at one of her and Nico taken before the show in front of the stage. They’re both not looking at the camera but at each other. She’s in the middle of talking — about what, she can’t remember — as Nico is just smiling at her.
She looks down at the sleeping man next to her. She loves him so fucking much.
…..
(She does end up telling Nico that she loves him a few days later, as they’re weaving through a farmer’s market in Lucerne, him carrying the bags filled with fresh vegetables and other groceries that they’re using to make dinner tonight. She thinks he doesn't hear her at first, but he tugs them towards the side and drops the bags so he can cup her face in his hands and kiss her.
“You love me?” He murmurs.
“Yeah,” she whispers. “I-I know it’s soon and you don’t have to say it back-”
He shakes his head with a grin, “Shut up.” He kisses her again. “I love you, Schatz.”
“Really?” She swallows. “You’re not just saying that?”
“I love you,” he repeats firmly. “I adore you, if we’re gonna be honest. You’re getting really close to be one of the best things that Jersey has brought me.”
“Well, now you’re just being stupid. How about, oh I don’t know, your entire career?”
He picks up their bags again, tossing an arm over her shoulder. “One of the best. Love you.”
She lets out a happy sigh, momentarily leaning her head on his shoulder as the sun hits their skin)
…..
The Switzerland tour is wrapped up in the best way, in Nico’s hometown of Naters, right by the mountains. Seriously, how is one country allowed to be this beautiful? She gets to hear the stories that litter these streets, the memories associated with the air interlacing with the wind, from a man who she loves and loves her. She tries not to think about how this is the last moments they’ll have until he comes back to New Jersey in September.
The night before she takes off, they go out to dinner at a fancy enough place that Clementine’s pulling out one of her more formal dresses. The candlelight illuminates Nico reverently, his brown eyes not tearing away from her for more than 15 seconds the whole night. The attention would be overwhelming, but Clementine just lets herself sink into it.
This feeling of being loved like this? It’s new. And she’s fully aware that it’s fragile and it could crumble any minute. But not right now. Not with Nico looking at her like she’s the only person in the room.
When he drops her off at Zurich airport the next day, she hugs him for a full minute. She doesn’t cry, but there’s a pull at her heart that plants the silly idea of staying here forever just so that she doesn’t have to leave him. But she pulls away, kisses him one more time, runs a hand through his hair, before grabbing her things and walking through the automatic doors.
…..
Clementine’s about to take a shower when she hears a key click into place. Seconds later, she’s sandwiched between Jack and Luke, uncontrollably laughing. She’s missed them dearly.
Luke smacks a kiss on her cheek. Jack ruffles her hair. She scolds them about leaving their bags in the front door where anyone could trip on them.
They’re back for another season, albeit a bit early to spend their last few summer days in the city. Nico lands tomorrow. Her Google Calendar has been synched with the Devils and Canucks game schedules.
Suddenly, the heat wave that’s hit New York / New Jersey doesn’t feel so constricting anymore.
…..
She might’ve had to bribe Ben to switch shifts with her, but there was no way she was gonna miss the home opener. Even if she’s extremely tired.
Clementine somehow makes it home before Jack and Luke are due to be at the rink earlier than normal for the carpet and other things. They’re both dressed and ready to head out. It’s a reminder that if Clementine sits on her couch for even 5 minutes, she will fall asleep. So she shouldn’t do that.
Not even a minute after she shut the front door, there’s a knock. Jack calls out that it’s open and Nico walks in.
If this were a few months ago, Clementine would blame just getting back from a long day of work for her eyes literally popping open. But it’s not, and she calls the man who walked through the door her boyfriend. Yet here she is, in her scrubs with her messy ponytail and smelling of hospital, just staring.
Holy. Shit. Nico looks hot. Which, like, yeah, he always does. Clementine is well aware that her boyfriend is a very attractive man. But something about the new green three piece suit that she had helped him pick out over FaceTime when he was still in Switzerland and his hair and the overall look has her literally speechless.
Luke, like the bitch he is, takes note and just laughs. “Cat got your tongue, Clemmy?”
She finds her voice. “Fuck off.”
Nico just smirks as he hugs Jack and Luke before walking over to give her a peck, “Hi.”
“Absolutely not,” she backs away when Nico reaches for a hug. He pouts but she shakes her head. “I just worked for 12 hours in a hospital. You do not want to hug me.”
“Of course I want to hug you. I love you.”
Somewhere behind them, she hears a gag. Gags, actually. She sticks out her middle finger behind her back before leaning in to give him another kiss. “I’ll hug you after the game when I’m clean.” He ignores her and just smothers her in a hug as she squeals. He presses exaggerated kisses all over her face as she tries to slither out of his hold. “Stop!” She breathes out in between laughs. “I’m literally so gross.”
“You’re beautiful.”
“Can you two not?” Luke deadpans.
The couple both roll their eyes. “This is nothing,” Clementine retorts.
“I know, which makes it worse.”
Jack snorts as he grabs his water bottle and keys. “You two ready to go? We’re cutting it close.”
“Yeah,” Nico tosses Jack his eyes. “You guys go down first. I’ll be a second.”
Jack looks between his captain and sister with a subtle glare. “Five minutes.”
“We are older than you,” Clementine retorts. Jack rolls his eyes before exaggeratedly blowing a kiss to Clementine. She scoffs but blows him and Luke a kiss as they walk out the front door. “They’re annoying.”
Nico chuckles, before brushing a stray piece of her hair behind her ear. “How was your day?”
“Fucking brilliant,” she deadpans. “You can’t tell by my messy hair and eye bags?”
His eyebrows furrow. “If you’re too tired to come to the game, you don’t-”
“Don’t even finish that sentence. I’m not missing the home opener. Are you insane? I’ll be good after a shower and a beer or two.” She places her hands and gently straightens his jacket into place. “You look incredibly hot.”
“Yeah?”
She kisses the smirk off his face. “Oh please. Like you don’t know.”
“It’s a good ego boost hearing that from the person’s opinion I care about the most.”
She gently brushes her hand through his hair. “I’m a very lucky woman.”
“I’m the lucky one,” he presses one last kiss on her lips. “I’ll see you after?”
She tilts her head to the side and pouts a bit. “Thought I was going home with you after no matter what, Captain.”
Nico’s eyes darken the slightest bit. Bingo. “Careful, baby.”
Clementine shrugs nonchalantly. “Have fun. Maybe score a goal or two for me?”
“What do I get if I do?”
“Careful, baby,” she echoes with a smirk. “You should head out before Jack and Luke storm back in here. And you know they will.”
He groans. “You ruined the moment.”
She chuckles, gently shoving him back. “Good luck. I’ll see you soon. I love you.”
“I love you too.”
…..
It’s not like anything is wrong, perse.
Clementine doesn’t often get into her overthinking moods. Frankly, she doesn’t have time for it. Since she was 18, it was study hard, let herself be dragged out once in awhile by her friends away from the books, listen to her own gut when it told her she actually needed a break, feel herself falling more in love with medicine and patients and caring for them, rinse and repeat. She’s 27 now, and the contours of that thinking have adjusted to whatever moment she’s in, but her core is still the same.
But when she finds herself in these overthinking moods, it consumes her. Her mom once told her it causes her to think irrationally, and Clementine had snapped back, even though deep down, she knew it was true.
These overthinking moods could be about anything, and have been about anything. From grades, to the overwhelming ache of missing her father, to questioning if the path she’s worked so hard for is worth it, to questioning if going to California for eight years and away from everyone was the best choice or just the convenient excuse she could use when in reality, she was running from her problems. From watching Quinn, Jack and Luke from right next to them but also from so, so far away, to making sure her mother still enjoys and loves life even though it’s been almost ten years since she lost her partner, to her own self worth and if she’s as good of a person that everyone always tells her she is and how that can be true if sometimes she feels like she’s grasping at straws.
The point is, Clementine knows herself well enough to know when one of these moods is coming.
It hits her full force on her commute the way to the hospital, because of course it does. Last night had been really fun with the season home opener. She sat with all the significant others for the first time and the vibe was high. When Nico had scored, the girls had all cheered and pointed to her as she finished off a beer. Some of the fans had given her high fives and maybe had caught on, she thinks, especially because she was wearing a 13 jersey and Nico had pointed in her direction after he scored. But Devils fans are also just really nice, so it also could’ve been nothing.
She already had a lot of the other women’s phone numbers from last year’s Friendsgiving, but she was officially added into the group chat because she’s not just Jack and Luke’s pseudo-sister who lives with them anymore. She’s also the captain’s girlfriend.
Something about that has her mind racing this morning as she watches the streets of New York City at 7:29 a.m. outside the bus window. Now she’s thinking about whether she should be doing more because of that title. In the grand scheme of things, her and Nico haven’t been dating for that long. Realistically, she knows no one is expecting her to do anything more. She venmoed Nicole immediately yesterday when she had casually mentioned the money pool all the significant others have for various things like events, gifts and other things. But should Clementine be the one spearheading that because her boyfriend’s the captain? She just got here. She has no fucking idea.
She always thought being surrounded by hockey her whole life would help her in most of these situations. Not this one.
When the time comes — if the time comes and her and Nico even last as long as she wants to — and off-season comes back around, is he gonna expect her to spend it in Switzerland with him? Obviously, that didn’t happen this summer because they had literally just started dating, but what about the future? She wouldn’t ever ask him to move his training closer to her, but how would off-seasons work in different countries when the regular season is already crazy enough? She knows All-Star breaks and off-season vacations are a thing, but with her inflexible work schedule, how is all that going to work? Will he be upset that she probably won’t be able to join him? What if, somehow, Nico is traded to another team? Clementine’s home for the next four years is going to be New Jersey / New York. And then, vice versa, what happens if her future leads her to yet another part of the country?
Yeah, she’s majorly overthinking now.
Usually, she would talk to someone about it, but in a rare instance, her mind comes up blank. Her mom and Ellen would just tell her to slow down and that she’s being silly. Emilia and her other friends at the hospital would listen, but wouldn't really get it. The other significant others are nice, but she doesn’t feel particularly close enough with any of them yet to voice her intrusive thoughts. No way is she talking to Quinn, Jack or Luke about this.
That would leave Nico. But there’s something about that that feels off too.
She’s also been told multiple times that she can’t keep things to herself. And she really does think she’s gotten better at it throughout the years. But old habits die hard. So she also does something she’s really good at. Putting it all away the second she walks into the hospital
The next time she thinks about it is during a quick break she has inbetween patients, when she checks her phone and sees the notifications from the significant other group chat. Nothing important as she thumbs through quickly, but it still leaves her with a weird feeling in her stomach.
And again, she wills those thoughts to go away as she steps back out into the hallway.
The next few days, Clementine doesn’t see Nico much. She’s at the hospital and he’s busy with the new season starting and getting back into the swing of things, making sure his team is doing well on and off the ice and making sure new guys are acclimating. It’s nothing out of the ordinary — it’s not like she’s seeing Jack and Luke that much either while living with them. But she also knows deep down that it’s more than that.
A week and a half after the season opener, Nico texts her to see if she wants to come over to his after her shift and they can make dinner together. Despite whatever weird things she’s thinking, she says yes. It hits her like a brick that they haven’t seen each other since Nico kissed her goodnight after the season opener.
She can tell something is on his mind immediately, or maybe that he knows something is on her mind, but they both don’t mention it the whole night. Instead, they loosely follow a steak dinner recipe Nico found online and keep the topics light.
But she can’t help but feel like something is off the whole night. Clementine knows she should ask him. Talk to him about it.
She doesn’t.
Her stomach remains in weird knots for the next few days when she lets herself think even for a second about her boyfriend, who’s supposed to be the person she can talk to these things about, right? Clementine’s a bit out of practice — it’s been over three years since she’s had anything sembling a relationship — but goddamn, she doesn’t think this is normal.
But she doesn’t want to burden Nico. He’s already overwhelmed enough with everything on his plate. She can see the wheels constantly turning in his mind. She doesn’t want to add onto that.
So, Clementine avoids.
…..
More patients. More long hours. The Devils first road trip. She should’ve known the people she lives with would pick up on something sooner than later.
“Are you and Schao fighting?”
Clementine has no idea where that nickname came from and has never asked. Hockey players are weird creatures, the nicknames they give their teammates included.
She keeps her head down, putting the chicken pot pies in the oven. “Why do you ask?”
“Because I asked if he wanted to come by for dinner and he made some shitty excuse about calling his family or something.”
“Calling family is not a shitty excuse,” Clementine says automatically. Her back is towards them, but she knows Luke always beelines directly towards the bathroom to rinse off right after practice. So Jack’s the one who’s dropping their bags loudly on the floor. “Bags against the wall, Jacky.”
He grumbles and Clementine smirks to herself in satisfaction as she hears Jack move the bags. “So? Trouble in paradise?”
“None of your business.”
“Dude.”
“I mean it. None of your business.”
She doesn’t exactly snap — somehow, Quinn, Jack and Luke have never annoyed her enough to make her want to — but it’s something close to it. Silence, and then she hears Jack rounding the kitchen island. He tugs at her arm. “Do I need to beat him up? I know he’s my captain or whatever, but I will.”
“Absolutely not.” She finally makes eye contact with him and is taken aback at how serious Jack looks. “I’m not fucking with your team chemistry.”
“Who cares about team chemistry?” Jack asks, watching as she stirs the glazed carrots. “You’re my sister. So I’ll ask again. Do I need to whoop his ass?”
She sighs, leaning her hip against the counter. “No.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure.”
“Do you want to talk about it?”
She shrugs. “There’s nothing much to it. Just a bump in the road, I guess.”
“About?” Jack presses lightly.
Clementine bites her lip. One part of her is telling her that she shouldn’t talk to Jack — or Luke — about her relationship troubles simply due to the fact that Nico’s their captain and friend and teammate and rock and all of that. But the other part of her does want to finally talk to someone. “I think we’re trying to figure out how to be together with both our busy schedules and it’s…tougher than we anticipated.”
Jack hums, “I see.”
Despite herself, Clementine snorts. “I’m not getting relationship advice from my younger brother. I’m not stooping that low.”
“Lame,” Jack shoots back. “Your loss. I think I could give you some decent Nico advice. I’ve known him much longer than you have, you know.”
He does have a point. She watches him blow a piece of hair out of his face in thought. Then, Luke walks in with his damp hair.
“What are you guys talking about?” Luke asks.
“Nothing.”
“Nico.” She glares at Jack, who just shrugs with a smirk.
Luke sits down across from her. “Oh wonderful. We’re talking about how miserable he’s been lately?”
Clementine busies herself by pouring him out a glass of water. “Nico’s been miserable?”
“Uh, yeah.” Luke says in a know-it-all voice that has her wanting to smack him on the head. “Besides, like, maybe a few smiles on the ice after a good play or game or whatever, he’s just had those sad eyes.”
Ah, yes. Those sad eyes. Clementine’s acquainted herself with those, even last season when they weren’t together. They come out after every loss. They’ve never come because of her.
She shrugs, trying to be casual about it. She can feel Jack’s eyes narrowing and knows that his brain is moving. People don’t give Jack enough credit for how perceptive he can be. He tugs at her sleeve again, and Clementine sighs, lowering the flame so she can give him his full attention.
“Do I need to talk to him?” Jack asks softly. “I don’t like seeing either of you sad.”
“Wait, hold on,” Luke interrupts. “You can’t talk to him if you don’t know what’s going on, Jacky.”
“No one is talking to anyone,” she says. “We just haven’t been able to see each other much lately. Or don’t want to. I don’t know.”
“Clee.” Jack says flatly.
She finally cracks, swallowing. “Obviously, I know what a season looks like. I mean, fuck, I lived with you two last year and I literally grew up with hockey all around me. I know it’s busy and I know he’s even busier because he’s captain or whatever. But shit, sometimes it feels like…I don’t know.”
“It feels like what?” Jack presses.
She puts her head in her hands for a few moments before looking back up, squeezing her eyes together to keep the frustrated tears at bay. “Sometimes it feels like he doesn’t even want to be around me. Like we’re strangers or just friends or whatever”
“What?” Luke deadpans. “Clemmy, that’s…what?”
Jack throws his brother a dirty look. “Let her finish.”
“And it’s on me too,” she continues as if they hadn’t interrupted. “Like, yeah, he’s busy, but so am I. And I’ve been taking extra shifts and staying at the hospital to study longer because things are getting harder but, I don’t know. I guess now that we’re actually in the season it’s a whole other thing. I know I’m being unreasonable. Maybe I’m just not cut out for a relationship or whatever.”
She knows the last sentence is an intrusive thought. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t have some semblance of meaning.
“That’s stupid,” Jack says. Clementine looks up from the table to look at him sadly. He has a look of fire in his eyes. “The last part, I mean. Not cut out for a relationship? What does that even mean?”
“If that’s not it, what is?” She huffs out. “I just feel like, I’m losing him? Assuming that I had him in the first place, I guess.”
“Clementine,” Luke starts. He never calls her by her government name. “What are you talking about? That boy is head over heels for you. You’ve had him since the moment you two met, I’m pretty sure.”
“Have you guys talked about this?” Jack asks. “Like, actually sat down and talked about how you’re feeling and why you’re upset.”
“How can we talk when I don’t even know why I’m upset?”
“It doesn't need to be, like, extremely coherent. Even if it doesn’t come out pretty or whatever, at least he’d know and stop making assumptions. And as someone who knows Nico, he’s definitely doing that, but probably not talking to you about it because he thinks he’ll just burden you with it.”
Clementine groans. “That’s the crux of it, I think. We’re not talking about the things that matter. We should be able to do that. Because I also think I’m burdening him with my unnecessary problems.”
“So, let me get this straight,” Luke starts. “Cap’s miserable and you’re miserable because you’re not…talking to each other?”
“Well, when you put it like that, I sound like a dumbass.” She picks at her nails. “It’s also more than that. A lot of factors involved.”
“I’ll talk to him,” Jack promises.
Clementine glares at him. “No. Stay out of it, Jacky. You too, Luke. I’m not putting you guys in the middle of our shit when you have to play with him.”
“I’m not gonna say anything bad,” Jack says. “You said that you feel like he doesn’t wanna talk to you, right? Which I know is a load of bullshit. He, again, probably just thinks he’s bothering you with his shit because that’s how Nico operates. He’s a great captain and will listen to anyone else’s problems, but thinks that no one wants to hear his, which, like you said, is stupid, especially when it comes down to you two. I’ll talk to him, Clee. Give him a little push. And then you two need to talk.”
She turns towards Luke — since when does she trust Luke enough to determine a good idea from a bad one? — who shrugs. “It wouldn’t hurt,” Luke says. “Jack has a way of getting through to Nico like no one else can.”
“Yeah, but that’s on ice stuff. This is off-ice stuff. And something that doesn't involve you guys.”
Jack lets out a little noise at that. “Hate to say it, but the second you guys started dating, we were already involved.”
She sighs. Because he’s right. Again. “I love him,” she says.
“I know. And he loves you too. No one’s doubting that,” Jack says. The oven beeps and before she can move, Luke rushes to gather the pies. “I won’t overstep, I promise.”
They let the topic go for the rest of dinner.
…..
Clementine doesn’t even get the chance to fully swing open the door the next afternoon before Nico’s pulling her into a tight hug. She freezes for a few seconds before melting into his embrace, rubbing her thumbs against the back of his neck as he rests his head on her shoulder. He mumbles something and she asks him to repeat it.
He straightens up, hands still wrapped around her and clears his throat. “I always want to be around you.”
She blinks, before sighing in realization. “Whatever Jack said, it’s-”
“It’s not about what he said,” Nico says, closing the door behind him. “Not entirely. He just…lit a fire up my ass a bit.”
“A bit too bluntly and with so little tact that would seem rude if it wasn’t coming from Jack?”
Nico snickers. “Yeah.” He calms down and looks at her seriously. “I love you.”
“I love you too,” she responds automatically.
“No, I mean,” he pauses and swallows. Clementine knows his wheels are turning. Even after being in North America for almost a decade, sometimes his English fails him and it takes a few moments for him to formulate what he wants to say. “I love you. I always want to be around you. I want to hear about your days at the hospital and I want to kiss you after every win and to hug you after every loss. But most importantly, I want to hear about your thoughts and feelings about everything, and that includes us. I’m sorry that you haven’t felt comfortable to do that lately.”
Her heart lurches and she places her hands on his cheeks. She can’t take the sad, watery eyes. “Hey. Hey. It’s okay. It’s alright. It’s on me too.”
He vehemently shakes his head, his hands reaching to wrap around her wrists. “No, it’s not. I-I’m the one with- you’ve given me so much control, with the season and everything, when you’re just as busy. Probably even busier than me. Shit, you’re literally a doctor. That’s nothing compared to what I do.”
“Nico-“
“I know I need to work on communicating and letting people in. It’s been an issue my whole life. Just ask Nina. I, you know, the team is wonderful and supportive, but I still feel the need to not let them know too much about my struggles, you know? Because I’m supposed to be the leader. But you’re not part of the team. Not in that way. You’re my girlfriend. My best friend. And I need to work on talking things through with you instead of my instinct of shutting down or dealing with it myself.”
Clementine blinks, taking it in. She’s always known Nico to be self aware, but this is a whole new level.
He kisses her gently, before pressing his forehead against hers. “I’m sorry. I’ll be better. That’s a promise. You can come to me with anything, even if you don’t think it’ll be something I want to hear. You can trust me. Rely on me. I’ll prove it to you everyday.”
“You don’t need to prove anything to me,” she says, rubbing his cheekbones with her thumbs. “Just…please talk to me? And I also need to work on doing that with you. I know we’re both busy and have our own separate lives-”
“You are a part of my life,” Nico assures. “A huge part. Like yeah, it’s separate with the fact that you have the hospital and your people there and I have hockey and the people there, but not really. We’re a team, right?”
She smiles at him repeating her words back to her face. She had said that once in their phone calls over the summer where she started rambling about how she’s always seen romantic relationships as more than just sweeping each other off their feet. ‘If the two people aren’t on the same team, then what’s the point? Then it’s just two people with a whole lot of feelings who never truly see each other eye to eye’ she had said.
“Yeah. We’re a team. Since we’re a team, can I propose something?”
“Anything,” Nico rushes out. And it’s so nice to know for sure that he means it.
“Can we try to do one night a week? Just for us? Unless you’re on a road trip or I have a weird shift schedule for some reason. Obviously, more would be great, but one at the bare minimum?”
Nico hums. “One guaranteed date night with you every week? I think I can manage.”
“You think?” she pokes his side.
“It’s perfect,” he says with pure sincerity. “You’re perfect.”
She rolls her eyes. “Far from it.”
“False,” he beams, sneaking another kiss. Clementine’s heart feels the lightest it’s felt in weeks. “I can’t believe Jack was right.”
She snorts. “About? Jack’s never right.”
“I know,” he rolls his eyes, before looking at her in a way that makes butterflies flutter in her stomach. “But he was right this time.”
Oh. They’re not talking about the fight anymore.
…..
(Clementine finally tells Nico everything that day about the overthinking — the tendencies and the topics she was overthinking about this time. He’s rubbing her knee as she talks about how she feels like she has to be setting an example or something because she’s dating him. She knows he wants to interrupt and assure her. She appreciates that he waits until she finishes.
He reassures her, which is nice, but he realizes that that’s not necessarily what she needs. Clementine just needs someone to listen. And Nico thinks everything she says is always worth listening to.
But Clementine also likes to be proactive and have tangible next steps, something she and him have in common. So they both come up with the first step: Clementine sends a text to Kristen Haula, who has a lot of experience of just … being the significant other to a professional athlete. Kristen responds quickly and kindly, asking when Clementine has a day off from work where she can come over and they can chat.
It’s always a breath of relief knowing people want to help with problems that she thinks are stupid. Because they’re usually not stupid. Nico’s there to assure her of that.
She goes to sleep that night with a smile.)
…..
That conversation is just the start. Because you can say all you want in a relationship, say you need to improve things, but until things are actually done, it doesn’t mean squat.
She can tell there’s something on Nico’s mind, even in the short phone call as he’s heading to the rink before a game and she’s heading home from the hospital. Clementine asks multiple times if he’s sure he’s okay and he tells her he’s fine, so she lets it go, wishing him good luck and assuring him she’ll be watching.
The Devils lose 5-1 to Vegas, and it’s so tough to watch that she almost wants to turn it off before it ends, especially after the camera pans to Nico’s face and Jack breaking his stick on the boards in frustration after the final buzzer sounds. A four game losing streak.
After giving Jack and Luke extra long hugs, Luke burying his face into her shoulder and Jack clutching her t-shirt, she calls Nico as she’s climbing into bed.
“Hey baby.”
“Hi.”
“Don’t beat yourself up too much, okay? Are you back at your place?”
“Yeah. What are you doing awake?”
She swallows at his blunt tone. “I wanted to catch you afterwards.”
“I’m fine. Don’t worry about me. Get some sleep.”
“Oh. Okay. Are you sure you don’t wanna talk about it?”
A rustle on his end. “I’m sure.”
“Want me to come by tomorrow morning? I don’t have to head in until the afternoon.”
Silence. “Yeah?” The raspy voice he’s gotten from yelling during the game momentarily makes her smile because she’s always found it so attractive. “Are you sure?”
“Of course.”
“Okay,” she thinks his voice softens. “Yeah. I’d love that.”
“Great. Goodnight, then. I’ll see you in the morning. Sweet dreams. I love you.”
“Goodnight, Schätzli. I love you.”
The next morning, she punches in Nico’s code and walks in to him pouring out a cup of coffee for her. He’s dressed in his typical day off attire: a random t-shirt that she thinks looks unfairly good on him, gray sweatpants and his hair is all messed up. She paddles over to the kitchen.
From behind, she wraps her arms around his waist. “Hi baby.”
“Hey,” he turns in her arms to peck her lips. “You eat yet?” He asks.
“Mmhmm.”
He hums, following her to the couch and sinking down right next to her. He tucks himself into the blanket with an involuntary hum, burying himself into the pillow, dragging her down so that she’s laying on his chest. She breathes in his scent and automatically smiles. She feels him physically relax.
“How’s the hospital been?”
Clementine shrugs. “The usual.”
“Tell me more.”
She blinks. Oh, she realizes. And she then talks about random details of her week that don’t actually matter but she’s figured out that sometimes he just likes to listen to her voice. Whether to ground himself, get himself out of his own head or both. He hums in all the right places to show he’s listening, but she also doesn’t really need him to listen about the workplace drama of people having a theory that two of her coworkers are hooking up.
There’s a lull in the conversation as she listens to his heartbeat. She thinks he might have fallen asleep. She doesn’t dare move to check.
“Eight.”
So he’s not asleep. She taps her fingers on his chest. “Hm?”r
“This is my eighth season in the league. Eighth in Jersey. And I have nothing to show for it.” She swallows. She debates sitting up so she can see him, but she stays still. He sighs. “I feel like we’re just never going to have a good start to the season, and it’s just like this every year and I’m not doing anything right. I can’t shoot. I can’t score. I can’t lead this team.”
“Nico-“
“At this point, if we’re not the team that’s gonna get Jersey to the cup, then who is? It’s always been about potential and things falling into place and sometimes I feel like all of it has and then we end up falling short anyways.” He starts breathing faster and Clementine sits up, holding his hands. She can see the storm in his eyes. “Fuck, I’m the captain. Part of my job is to make sure this doesn’t happen and that when we gain momentum, that we don’t lose it. But it feels like we can’t even gain that momentum so we’re stuck in whatever the hell we’re stuck in. It’s starting to remind me of my first few seasons here, which really fucking sucks and just shouldn’t be where we’re at. Are the pieces ever going to come together like everyone has been saying it will?”
(In the back of her mind, Clementine’s stomach drops because Nico rarely swears, and he just dropped two f bombs in the last 15 seconds)
She squeezes his hands. “Nico. Please listen to me when I say this. It is not all on you. Captain or not, no one is expecting you to carry all of that on your shoulders.” He opens his mouth to counter but she’s quicker. “Nope. I don’t want to hear it. If I’ve learned anything from growing up with three hockey-playing brothers, is that hockey is a team sport. You win together. You lose together. Everything you go through? You go through together.”
“But I feel like I’m not doing anything right.”
“If any single one of your teammates heard you right now, I know they’d smack you in the face.” Clementine says bluntly. “Even before we were dating, from day one of training camp in Jack’s rookie year, when you didn’t even have the C yet, he was already raving to me about how good of a role model you were. You didn’t just get that C just because, Nico. You were and are the best option. I fully believe it. Your teammates respect you so much, baby. I see it with my own eyes every game. And they love and respect you enough to know that this is not all on you. You lead your team so beautifully. It is your team. And fuck the media and what they’re saying. Half of them can’t even hold a stick in their hand or skate. Literally who cares what they think? The outside noise is all bullshit anyways.” She rubs his cheekbones with her thumbs. “I know my words can’t fix the slump you guys are in. But I refuse to let you believe that any of this is entirely your fault. It is anything but. I refuse you to let you believe you’re anything but a good leader. You are the best leader. But you need to put less pressure on yourself over things that are out of your control.”
She lets her words wash over him, as he nods. One of her favorite things about him is that he’s always so expressive, especially in the domestic environment of his apartment under the maroon blanket she knitted him for Christmas. Here he is, not under any arena lights, just in his home away from home, trying to find some grounding. She places a kiss on his forehead and he practically falls into her touch.
“Everything about you always helps,” Nico whispers. “Thank you.”
“No need,” she smiles as his cheek rests on her stomach, arms wrapped around her waist in a tight embrace. “It’s okay to be frustrated and upset, honey. I get it. But you’re gonna drive yourself insane if you keep holding all this weight on your shoulders. Share it with others. Share it with your teammates. Share it with me. It’s what we’re here for.” Nico mutters something in German and she snorts. “English, please.”
“I don’t want to share it with you if it means I’m gonna explode and scare you. That’s the last thing I want to do.”
Clementine blinks, digesting that statement. She picks her words carefully. “It’s more than okay to show emotions. Any psychologist would tell you it’s healthy to do so. The fact that you’re afraid at the idea of scaring me is probably a good indicator that you won’t. And please. Give me some credit. I don’t get scared easily.” She leans down to press a kiss in his hair. “I mean it. Share the burdens, baby. We all want to help.”
He hums and she lets him play with her fingers before she has to go to work.
…..
There were cons to not living near the boys for eight years — missing big moments and not having their presence around all the time being the two biggest ones.
But there were pros too. Such as, not being a part of moments that she would rather be anywhere else for. She doesn’t know who gave the three boys the sex talk (it probably was Quinn, but who gave it to him?) and she knows that if she had been in Toronto or Michigan during that time, she would’ve begrudgingly done it and hated every second.
If she thinks about it too much, it’s kinda incredible how she hasn’t encountered this particular situation yet.
This particular situation being this: Clementine’s just come back from an overnight shift she got let off early from, exhausted to her bones but not exhausted enough to be immobile. On the drive back from the station, she was debating whether to stop by her favorite deli or make her own brunch. She ultimately decided that there are too many things in the fridge to justify her going to the deli. Maybe next week.
So now here she is, preparing her feta egg bake thing that she saw on TikTok, a mix of vegetables drizzled in olive oil and various herbs sitting on the counter on another tray, ready to go into the oven. She hears the front door open and glaces at the clock on the microwave. Morning skate must’ve been earlier than normal today.
“Hello?” Luke’s voice calls out.
“In the kitchen!”
She hears two pairs of footsteps come closer, assuming that Jack is with him. Though if she had stopped to think about it, she would’ve automatically thought it was weird that he didn’t call out a greeting either. She turns around, half smile planted on her face. The half smile doesn’t exactly drop at the sight of the unknown blonde girl next to him. Just turns more confused. Before Clementine can say anything, Luke speaks up.
“Hey. I didn’t think you’d be home until later.”
“They let me out early,” she searches her mind quickly, trying to see how to ask who the fuck is in their kitchen without sounding like a bitch.
Luckily, Luke does it for her. He clears his throat. “Uh, Clemmy, this is Ava. Ava, Clemmy. Or, Clementine, I guess.”
Clementine decides to put him out of his misery a bit. She hopes her smile is friendly enough. “Nice to meet you, Ava.”
“Same here. Are you Jack’s girlfriend?”
Before she can stop herself, she snickers. “He fucking wishes.”
“That’s Amelie,” Luke corrects. “Clemmy’s dating Nico, my captain.”
Ava’s eyes widen. “Oh. I’m so sorry!”
“It’s okay,” Clementine waves away her apology easily. “A lot of names. A lot of characters. Speaking of, where is Jack?”
“Dropped him off at Amelie’s after practice, actually. She’s totally gonna kill me though. I think she has to head to Philly later.”
“She’s definitely gonna kill you. Have you two eaten yet?” She asks politely.
Ava nods. “We did. Thank you so much though.”
“Anytime.” Luke makes a move to lead Ava to his room and Clementine immediately gets the hint. “If you change your mind, our fridge is open to all. I live here, which means there should be something edible.”
“Hey!” Luke protests. The two girls laugh. “Thanks though. Are you heading to Cap’s?”
Clementine shrugs. “I was going to eat, nap and maybe head over later, but I also didn’t know your morning skate was earlier than normal. Maybe I’ll go over to his and use him as my pillow.”
“Don’t drive if you’re too tired,” Luke warns, sounding entirely too much like Jack. “Hisch can wait if needed.”
“Yeah, yeah.” She waves her spatula at them. “Alright. I’m off an overnight shift, so you know what that means.”
Luke rolls his eyes as Ava looks between them curiously. “Your social battery is at its lowest and you’ll start snapping soon.” Ava looks amused and Clementine grins. “C’mon, Ava. Let’s go to my room.”
“It was nice to meet you,” Ava says.
“Likewise,” Clementine responds. The second Luke’s door shuts, she puts the feta egg bake and the vegetables in the oven and immediately grabs her phone, thumbing over to her text chain with Nico.
Clementine Sandoval
lol just had a major big sister moment
She gets a reply in seconds.
Nico Hischier
???
A moment you haven’t already experienced?
Clementine Sandoval
luke just came home with a girl I’ve never met before
Nico Hischier
In the day time? Lol
Does Jack know about this?
Clementine Sandoval
lol i’m assuming not
i def would’ve heard about it by now
luke’s not that stupid if he wanted to keep it quiet (which it seems like he does) jack would be the last person he’d tell
Nico Hischier
You do realize I’m their captain, right?
I could very well be with Jack right now. He could be looking over my shoulder
Clementine Sandoval
please i’m not an amateur
luke already told me he dumped jack at amelie’s
what are you doing the rest of the day?
Nico Hischier
Sitting on my coach and staring at the wall waiting for my beautiful girlfriend to come by after she takes her nap
Clementine Sandoval
whipped
any chance i can come by earlier and nap at yours? didn’t know you guys had an earlier skate
Nico Hischier
Door will be unlocked ❤️
Clementine Sandoval
???? your door has a code
but thanks 🩵🩵 i’ll come by after i eat
After her food is cooked thoroughly, she eats quickly, flicking through emails on her laptop. She can hear a movie playing through Luke’s laptop in his room and murmured voices through the door. As she’s cleaning up and getting ready to head out, she debates on whether she should tell Luke or not. She probably should, because then he’ll start worrying, which is something that she’s noticed all the brothers have done more as they’ve gotten older.
“Luke!” She calls, “I’m heading out.”
“Okay,” she hears his voice through his door. “Are you coming back for dinner?”
“Not sure yet. I’ll text you.”
“Okay!”
Clementine chuckles before grabbing her stuff and closing the front door behind herself.
Nico snorts as she’s retelling what happened, sipping on a cup of coffee. Clementine’s rambling to the max, sitting up on his kitchen counter and swinging her legs, not stopping even as Nico slips himself inbetween them and plants his hands on her thighs.
Suddenly, she trails off with a yawn. He chuckles softly before engulfing her in a hug, kissing her neck softly. “Couch or bed?”
“You don’t like just lounging on your bed.”
“But it’s your nap time and you like my bed.”
She plays with his hair, placing her cup of coffee down carefully. “Couch.”
“Okay,” he hums, helping her off the counter. “Is there anything I need to wake you up for later?”
“I made some sort of promise a few days ago that I’d cook Jack and Luke dinner, and I feel bad that I haven’t done it yet.”
“They can come over here and we can both cook them something.”
“You have groceries in your fridge?”
He gives her a look as she giggles. He tosses a blanket over her. “Sleep before you start getting sassier on me.”
Clementine hums, eyes already drooping. She tugs at his shirt as he’s about to leave. “Stay.”
“Baby-”
“Just until I fall asleep,” she grins as he climbs in, immediately burying her head into his chest as his arm wraps around her. She hums, eyes already shut. “I love you,” she murmurs against the cotton of his shirt.
She feels the gentlest kiss on her forehead before drifting off to sleep.
…..
Clementine loves being able to switch her brain during a live hockey game. Unless she gets a call from anyone at the hospital — which hasn’t happened yet — any good hockey game can turn her often overtired and overstimulated brain off.
So when Sarah, one of the staffers she frequently runs into at Devils games, comes up to her row, Clementine’s immediately standing up. “Sarah? What are you doing up here?”
“Can you come with me for a second?” At Clementine’s concerned stare, Sarah continues quickly. “Nothing bad! Just want your help on something medical related.”
“Medical related?” Clementine stands up and starts following Sarah.
“One of the kids in the Islanders box hurt herself and I’m pretty sure it’s just a sprained ankle, but you work with kids so I figured you could give another opinion and calm her down, maybe? If you don’t mind, of course.”
Clementine breathes out a sigh of relief. This she can handle. “I don’t mind at all. Jesus, Sarah. I thought it was something more serious.”
Sarah grimaces. “Sorry. Again, I just want a second opinion. I’m sorry to interrupt you watching the-”
“I get it. And hey, I’ve watched dozens of games by now.” They arrive at the visitor’s suite and somehow, Clementine feels immediately at home even though there’s an adorable blonde girl crying on the floor with her mother kneeling down next to her.
Clementine bends down and sits on the back of her heels. “Hi cutie. My name is Clementine. I’m here to help you, okay?” The mom, who is drop dead gorgeous, mutters some encouraging words to her daughter. “Can you tell me what happened, sweetie?”
Inbetween hiccups, the young girl explains that she was running around because her dad had just scored a goal but had run into a chair and had fallen backwards and now her ankle really hurts and if it’s broken she won’t get to play with her friends at recess. Clementine softly shushes her and calms her down before asking if she can take a look. The young girl nods and Clementine gingerly takes her ankle, rolling up her jeans. She speaks to the girl softly (who Clementine learns is named Winnie), asking about who she’s here to see and the game and anything else to keep her distracted while she does her routine checks.
Clementine taps her ankle. “Well, good news, Winnie. It’s only swollen, which won’t require going to the hospital. I’m just gonna wrap it up for you and get you some ice to keep on it, okay? And lots of rest, which means no running around for a bit.” She nods thankfully at Sarah, who runs to grab some bandages and an ice pack.
“Does that mean I get to watch Disney all day tomorrow?” Winnie asks.
Clementine laughs. “That’s gonna be a decision your mama has to make.” She turns to the gorgeous blonde again with a smile. “Everything’s all fine. Just lots of rest and ice and she’ll be good in no time. You can give her children’s motrin if she complains that it hurts too much, but it shouldn’t if she isn’t moving it around.”
“Thank you so much,” she says gratefully, putting her hand out. “I’m Sydney. It’s nice to meet you. I’m really sorry for interrupting your game.”
Clementine waves her away. “It’s no problem at all. I’ve seen a bunch of these, so I’m not too pressed.”
“Are you a doctor?”
“Not yet technically. I’m in my second year of residency with pediatrics and ER. But I promise I know what I’m doing.”
“Oh, no! I trust you, don’t worry. You have a very calming presence.”
“Well, your daughter is super sweet. So I’m sure you have a lot to do with that.”
Sydney beams. “You’re so sweet! Thank you.”
“Who are you here for?”
“Number 17. Matt Martin. He’s my husband. How about you?”
Clementine chuckles, as Sarah comes back with the supplies and Clementine wraps the bandage around Winnie’s ankle. “Depends who you ask.”
“Oh?”
“Well, I grew up with Luke and Jack. 43 and 86. But I’m dating Nico. Number 13.”
“That’s the captain, right?”
“It is.”
Clementine’s surprise must show through her voice because Sydney laughs. “Honestly, I don’t know why I know that. I blame my past journalist self who picks up on details quickly. Or the Devils and Islanders being in the same division.”
“That’s completely fair. I feel like I know too much about hockey for someone who never played.”
“It’s an added layer when we choose who we surround ourselves with, right?” Sydney says and Clementine nods with a smile. “Where are you doing your residency?”
“I’m mainly at NYC Health and Hospitals / Bellevue. First and 28th.”
“Do you live in the city?”
“Oh, no. Though that’s probably smarter, right?” They both laugh. “No, I live with Jack and Luke in Hoboken. They kinda begged, and it saves me money, and I don’t mind the commute.”
Sydney looks around for Winnie, who’s hanging out with one of the other Isles wives and is occupied. “Am I keeping you from someone? Thank you again for all your help.”
“No, not at all! Decided to come out solo tonight.”
Sydney then nods to two empty seats against the glass. “Come sit with me?”
Clementine just smiles and follows her to the seat as Winnie runs at her legs. The two women laugh as Clementine picks her up and sits her on her hip.
She leaves that night with a new number in her phone. Jack whines about her “befriending the enemy” as Luke cackles. Nico just grins, because he knows what it’s like to be captivated by her energy instantly.
*****
Clementine’s reading on Nico’s couch when she hears him groan loudly from the kitchen. When she doesn’t hear an explanation, she finishes the sentence and looks up.
“Everything okay?”
“No,” he grumbles, walking back in and typing something rapidly on his phone. “The rookies and the young guys went out and got way too drunk and called me by accident. I literally couldn’t understand more than two words of what Shea was saying.”
“How are they getting home?”
Nico sighs and picks up his keys. “I’m getting them. I don’t trust them to not puke all over an Uber right now.”
“But you trust them to not puke in your car?”
“I’ll tell them to aim out the window.”
Clementine snorts, standing up. “You drank earlier. I’ll drive.”
Nico blinks. “I didn’t drink that much.”
“Don’t care. I’m driving. How many of them are there?”
Nico looks at his phone, presumably his texts, to confirm. “Five. But apparently Luke called Jack so he’s coming too.” Nico laughs, reading another text. “And Amelie. Must be a similar vibe at the Hughes apartment tonight.”
“It was. Amelie told me they were having a chill date night too.” She quickly goes to Nico’s room to toss on one of his Devils sweatshirts. She comes back out and sticks her hand out as Nico slips on his shoes. “Keys. And grab a few trash bags, please.”
Nico obeys before they’re both out the door, his hand naturally brushing against her back as they wait for the elevator. “I’m sorry.”
“For?”
“All of this.”
She snorts as the elevators doors shut. “Don’t need to apologize for your teammates acting their age.”
“Yeah, but it’s not your responsibility to deal with that.”
“It’s yours though.”
He furrows his eyebrows. “I’m not following.”
She rises on her tiptoes to kiss him, to which he responds with enthusiasm despite his confusion. “Your boys, my boys, no?” She murmurs against his lips, letting him steal two more kisses. “I’m dating you. You’re the captain of an NHL team. You look out for the guys. Therefore, so do I.”
Nico shakes his head with a fond smile as the elevator doors open and he shuffles them both to the garage, his hands steadily on her hips. “You’re the best, you know that?”
“Been told that once or twice in my life,” she dodges his pokes as they walk to the car.
It only takes them 15 minutes before they’re in front of a bar. Nico pulls in right next to Jack’s car and Clementine laughs as all four of them get out of their cars at the same time. One look at Amelie tells her that she probably was dragged out of bed to come here.
She nods at the younger girl as they trail behind their boyfriends walking into the bar. “Chauffeur?”
Amelie smiles wryly, handing her a few bottles of water for whoever is coming in Nico’s car. “No. I’m the one who actually opened the wine tonight. But I don’t trust Jack to wrangle these guys by himself. Also, he promised he’d get me lunch from my favorite place tomorrow before I have to drive to Long Island.”
Clementine whistles. “Good girlfriend you are.”
Amelie tosses an arm around Clementine’s shoulders, which makes the latter grin. Amelie had been a bit shyer when they met at the start of the season, but she likes to think she’s cracked the photographer’s exterior a bit. They walk into the bar and just follow the guys, who quickly find their teammates. Clementine only raises an eyebrow as Seamus stumbles to give Nico a hug, almost taking out Simon in the process, who looks like he’s about to either fall asleep or throw up any minute. Jack is subtly steering glasses of alcohol away from Alex as he’s chatting away to Luke. Clementine’s half convinced he’s speaking Swedish and Luke’s too drunk to realize. She scans the bar to find the last straggler and chuckles when she sees Nico (little Nico, she affectionately calls him) come out of the bathroom. He brightens up when he sees the older girl and Clementine laughs loudly as he almost falls into her arms.
She, Nico, Jack and Amelie corral everyone into the two cars — Luke, Alex and Nico riding with Jack and Amelie and Seamus and Simon with Clementine and Nico, all purely based on proximity. Clementine gives both Amelie and Jack hugs before climbing into the drivers seat. She gives Seamus and Simon each bottles of water as she starts the engine.
“Drink. The whole thing. Both of you.” She commands. She peeks through the rearview mirror to make sure they do.
“I’m waiting for the lecture, Mrs. Cap.” Seamus groans out.
Clementine snorts. “No lecture from me. But you guys do remember that you have a team meeting tomorrow, do you?”
“How do you know that?”
Nico snorts as an answer as Clementine rolls her eyes. “How much did you guys have?”
“I stopped counting after the third round of shots,” Seamus says. Simon might have fallen asleep for all she knows.
“And who bought that round?” Nico asks.
“Luke,” Seamus and Clementine say simultaneously. She hears Simon groan, so he’s not asleep. Nico just chuckles.
It only takes 30 minutes to get them both safely home and to get back to Nico’s apartment. It’s almost 2 a.m. by the time they get back. Clementine gets comfortable fast, with Nico’s body pressed up against hers. The last conscious thought she has before drifting off to sleep is that she wants to do this with him for the rest of her life.
The first thing she hears when she wakes up is a bunch of male voices. She squints at her phone. 10:27 a.m. Team meeting started at 10. She yawns and rolls out of bed, washing her face and brushing her teeth before deciding to go fix up a quick breakfast for herself before locking herself in Nico’s room so the team can do whatever they do during team meetings.
The voices all halt as she nears the living room. Any other situation she would be a bit embarrassed perhaps, but frankly, they all know and should’ve expected this. And they’re in her apartment. Or Nico’s. But it also might as well be ours.
She offers a lazy salute. “Morning boys.” A chorus of greetings echoes and Clementine chuckles. “Don’t mind me. I’ll be out of your hair in a second.”
“You can stay,” Nico says softly with a smile from where he’s standing behind the couch. She just waves him off, pours out a cup of coffee, quickly fixes herself some hummus toast with feta on top and slips back into his room.
She sets her food down carefully on the bedside table and eats while scrolling through her email and social media. She even puts her headphones in so she’s not tempted to listen to the guys through the wall.
It’s about a half an hour later when she hears a faint knock on the door. She calls out a “come in” and takes out her Airpods with a smile when Nico peeks his head in.
“Hi Schatz.”
“Hey. What’s up?”
“The boys wanna say hi,” she opens her mouth to protest but he beats to her to it. “We’re pretty much done. Pizza’s coming any minute so we’re just chilling out now.”
Clementine grabs her empty plate and mug, rising up to her toes to press a kiss on his cheek. “Breaking the diet?”
“We just won a tough back to back. We deserve it.”
“Sure you do,” she chuckles as he playfully swats her butt. They walk back out into the living room together and she rolls her eyes as everyone cheers. Nico heads back to the living room as she heads into the kitchen to start another pot of coffee, politely nudging Dawson and Dougie out of her way.
Nico’s apartment is spacious, but twenty plus hockey players all crowding around make it feel much smaller than normal. Clementine decides to swing herself on top of the counter to chat with Luke and John, mostly content with listening to them talk.
When she hears a chorus of laughter, she turns to the living room to see what’s going on to already see quite a few of the guys looking at her. She raises an eyebrow at Nico, who she swears has a slight blush painting his cheeks. But he doesn’t shy away and beams at her instead. With some boldness, she bounces over to him, squeezing in beside him on the couch. He leans into her touch automatically. She wonders if this is a side of their captain his team hasn’t seen much before.
That last thought has her hesitant for a second, but as if Nico can sense it, he takes her hand off his shoulder and kisses the back of it before going back to a previous conversation with Jesper. Her hand remains in his. She catches Timo’s close-lipped smile and Nate’s visible delight. Clementine just sends them a wink before leaning into Nico’s side.
Without missing a beat in laughing at something Jesper says, Nico places a kiss in her hair.
(Later, as the team is starting to filter out of Nico’s apartment, Jonas pulls him aside. Nico is immediately on high alert when Jonas decidedly switches to their native language. They don’t do that often during the season.
“She’s great. Clementine,” Jonas starts.
Nico’s eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “Yeah? You think so?”
“Yeah,” they both look over to the other side of the living room, where she’s in the midst of a playful debate about something with Jack and Jesper. Though from the way she punches Jack in the arm, maybe it’s not so playful. “I know we met at the end of last season, but I wanted to give it some time. She’s weirdly perfect for you.”
“Spit it out, Jonas,” Nico stares at him.
Jonas just stares back for a bit before letting out a small chuckle. “I’m really happy for you, truly. You deserve someone like her.”
“Like her?”
“Yeah. Someone smart, beautiful and who will be just as all in as you are.”
Nico looks down at his feet, heat rising up his neck all of a sudden. “She’s the best, really. Kinda keeps me sane without even trying.”
“That’s all you can ask for from a partner,” Jonas pats his shoulder once before calling out a goodbye to everyone.
Clementine rushes over to give Jonas a quick goodbye hug. Nico feels himself falling and not wanting anyone to catch him.)
…..
The universe is on their side for the 10 year anniversary of Miguel’s death, with the Canucks scheduled to play in town the day after. Ellen, Jim, Quinn, Jack, Amelie, Luke, Maeve, Clementine and Nico all go out to brunch on New Year’s Day, before heading to the cemetery.
They’re all bundled up as they lay out a few blankets, lay down their flowers and some of Miguel’s favorite food and snacks. The cemetery is quiet, but it’s quickly filled with everyone’s laughter as they share their favorite memories and reminisce. Quite a few tears are shed and the tissue box is passed around often.
When they’re about to leave, everyone gets their individual moments by his tombstone to pay their last respects. Clementine and Maeve let the Hughes’s go first, hands intertwined with each other. Then, Clementine and Maeve step up and the young woman swallows, her mom’s head falling on her shoulder. With one last squeeze, Maeve steps back and gently ushers Nico to stand next to his girlfriend despite his gentle protests.
The second she feels Nico’s arm draping across her back, Clementine lets out a sob as she buries part of her face into his jacket. It’s not a sad sob, but it’s not a happy one. She’s happy he’s here with her. She wishes her dad could meet him and love him as much as she knows he would.
Once they reach the bottom of the hill, Quinn reaches out to squeeze her hand. She keeps her right hand in his as Nico’s pressed against her left side. She stares ahead at her mother pressed between Ellen and Jim with Jack, Amelie and Luke right behind them in a similar embrace.
The birds are chirping. The sound of the wind is made even more noticeable as it whistles through the leaves. The sun is shining, not a single cloud in the sky.
Clementine feels peace settle into her heart.
#fucking finally lol everyone cheered#k writes#hockey fanfiction#nhl#nhl fic#hockey fic#new jersey devils#devils#nico hischier#nico hischier fic#nico hischier x oc#quinn hughes#jack hughes#luke hughes#nico hischier blurb#nico hischier writing#hockey writing#nhl writing#nhl blurb#hockey blurb#the blue au
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John Price x GN!firefighter!Reader
Hang Up The Coat
Umm so this is extremely self indulgent (I’m using Price to cope instead of facing the reality of my job)
Warnings: mentions of death, alcoholism, firefighter reader. SFW.
John had returned last night from his deployment to an empty home. Bottles scattered around, Piles of laundry from the past month. He knew it was getting bad but it seemed to have gotten worse in his absence. He didn’t know how to have the talk that needed to happen but you seemed to be on the edge of breaking and he’d be damned to let you get near it.
It was 07:13 in this morning and he had already polished the house clean. The was no evidence that anything was even remotely wrong. To price it was important to help you get better. Even if that meant waking up at 4AM to clean the house so you could relax when you got off shift. Working 48 hours consecutively absolutely exhausted you and he wanted to make sure you could have his undivided attention.
You had a habit of going full housewife when he was home. Cooking, cleaning and tending to his every need. Despite your families disappointment of getting a male dominated job you still can’t get rid of the traditional values you where raised to uphold. Your adoration for John was undeniable even after all these years. In a way you left that your life purpose was to serve him. And John lived his life to serve you, when he wasn’t at work the soldier in him melted away to reveal a kind hearted man with a love for his wife and board games.
He finally heard your car door shut in the driveway. He practically ran to the door to great you like a puppy. Opening the door you were greeted with a brown haired man with his hair pulled back and a smile plastered on his face. He was home a week earlier to your surprise.
“My love I missed you”
He pulls you into a deep kiss. His strong hands cradling your small head as he kissed you. The tears he hadn’t noticed poured into his hands.
“No, no, baby what’s wrong?”
You sniffled and handed him the paper that you hoped would say something different. Instead it read the same as all the times before.
Hello,
Thank you for applying for the lieutenant position. We regret to inform you that you were not selected this round. While you held the necessary certificates and training requirements the promotion committee believes you should improve as a member of the brotherhood before any further promotions. We appreciate your time and dedication in the selection process.
Thank you,
Chief
“Darling im so sorry”
He pulled you into a deep hug. His musk engulfs your senses. He’s been gone for three long lonely months. No contact with you per 141 policy. The isolation is suffocating. All your friends had moved on with life and left you behind so you were completely alone. The letter wasn’t helping with the sense of adulthood failure.
“I’m so tired, of this constant struggle to be enough”
“Maybe it’s time to consider other options”
His soft voice was afraid of what you’d say next.
“But it’s what I was made for. All these year and to just be done?!”
John felt a ping in his heart because he knew his honest words would still sting.
“Love you don’t need your job to be your purpose in life”
That’s when you began the real breakdown.
“But it’s what I’ve been doing since I was 18. I don’t know anything else, I’m stuck, but I love the job too much to quit. It’s like asking you to leave 141.”
You never intended to be a firefighter. It just kinda happened. That bright eyed rookie that was full of energy had been burned to pieces years ago. Your friends always told you that working a 48 hour shift must be so nice because you have so much time off. In reality you came home and slept for a few hours after the never ending late night 911 calls and days filled with the general public yelling at you for not being fast enough, cold dinners, washing bio hazards of your boots.
At home waking up to deal with the mental toll of the job and making yourself a glass of whiskey to ease your mind, only to overdo it and end up passed out on the kitchen floor.
The department you worked for always peached “brotherhood” but no matter how hard you worked you still remained an outside. Constantly getting pulled into the chiefs office for “not showing enough dedication”. They never recognized the extra effort you put in. The endless charity events you organized, overtime, teaching classes. Going to extra training classes eating away at your days off. Countless trainings out of town when your husband was home from deployment. None of it mattered to them. Never good enough.
Promotion time came and went again, this was round four of applying for promotion. Yet again missing out on becoming a lieutenant because you don’t fit into any of the clicks. You didn’t golf with the ranked officers on your days off. You didn’t get invited to the cookouts. They always said promotion was based off performance but the five newest officers proved that to be false. Lazy, arrogant, fat men had moved up while you stayed at the bottom. If you wanted to move up you needed to be one of the boys. How?
“It’s never enough for them is it” John has said just loud enough to be a whisper.
John was tired of seeing you get kicked around. It angered him more than you’ll ever know. He always stood by your side when things got hard. You had made it your goal to get promoted to lieutenant before you started trying for a family. John was never going to tell you but he has growing slightly impatient. He wanted you to spend your days happy, kids running around while he cooks breakfast and you sleep in. Not coming home pretending that you didn’t witness another overdose before breakfast and help the corenor bag another young person took far too soon before bed.
You barely had energy to kiss him when you got home. Your mental health had plummeted, your new hobby was drinking and screaming at the walls. Stumbling around with music blasting. You didn’t care about anything, and when you wanted to talk about something you turned it into an argument over nothing. The five foot nothing angel he fell in love with eight years ago was barely recognizable in you. The man that never wanted you to know pain, death, loneliness felt helpless.
But for whatever reason he still loved you. He recalls a time before you met when he was this way in the military, before 141. Angry at the world, doing his best with a bottle in his hand. He only realized he needed a change when he was given the option to stay or start 141. He chose to leave the bottle.
“Love maybe… maybe it’s time to close this chapter” he was gentle saying it as best as he could. He knew how much it hurt for you to hear it. But he knew you better than to let you keep being destructive. He could see the internal conflict within yourself behind the tears in your eyes.
“Then what do I do? I know what I want out of life but I just feel like I’ll lose part of myself if I stop”
“Do you think you’ll lose a part of yourself, or has the part of you that’s tired of pushing has turned into rage?”
“It’s turned from rage to sorrows. And I’m tired of being pushed around. And I’m tired of not being good enough… and…”
“And what love”
“I don’t want you to think less of me for calling it quits when you’ve always stood by be though it all. I want to go back to how I was to you. I’m so sorry I’ve neglected you for so long”
“Oh love you’ll always and forever be my strong angell. I would never think of you differently for quitting. You did such a good job and I know they don’t see it but I know. I will always know my wife fought hard. And I just want you to get better and I’m happy you want to. But I can’t let you keep hurting yourself like this”
“Then I think… I’m ready to hand up my coat.”
“Then that’s what you will do”
He gently kissed your lips and wiped away your tears.
He had a soft reassuring smile. He knew this was going to be a hard process for you but the job was eating you alive and you knew it too.
“Would you like me to help you write your letter of resignation?” His hands still holding your delicate face while his eyes looked down with love.
“I would love that”
#call of duty#captain john price#flowerwrites#john price#john price smut#captain john price x reader#captain johnathan price#captain price smut#captain price x reader#captain price#john price x you#price x y/n#john price cod#john price x reader
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Sick Surprise pt. 13 - Something Old and New pt. 1
I’m which it’s the days before the wedding!
Warnings: fluff! Drunk Y/N, mentions of smut, cursing, lmk if I missed anything!
Spencer Reid x fem!reader
The Bachelorette Party
Y/N squealed as Penelope came around with another round of cotton candy shots. “Okay! Let’s bring out the presents!” The bubbly blonde squeaked.
The woman gasped. “No way! You guys didn’t have to get me presents!” JJ and Emily sat on the opposite sides of her with four bags in their hands each. Penelope sat in the chair in front of her with about five in hers and a two of Y/N’s work friends sat in the surrounding chairs.
She smiled after picking up a little shot glass and down the sour liquid. “Yes we did! You’re getting married, and in two of these bags are for your honeymoon.” Emily winked. Y/N’s body heated and she giggled.
“Whatever! I’m gonna go with the least risky bag.” She looked at JJ and held her hand out. “Bag me, sexy.” The drinks must have really been getting to her.
JJ handed her a bag and she excitedly tapped her heels on the ground. She reached inside and felt something silky and smooth. She furrowed her brows and pulled it out.
It was a white robe all wrapped up neat and pretty with a blue bow. “Awww, JJ! This so so cute!” She gasped. On the back of the robe it said Mrs. Reid and their wedding date.
“I thought it would be cute to wear for photos and on the honeymoon.” She shrugged with a smile. Y/N leaned over and kissed her cheek. “Okay open my next one!”
Y/N grabbed the bag that was shoved I to her hands and reached inside. She rolled her eyes with a smile when’s he felt the lace on her fingers. She pulled it out and widened her eyes at the white lacy set with REID sewn on the front over the crotch.
“Are you guys trying to get him to break my vagina?” She asked, giggling and showing everyone the garment.
The women hollered and squealed as a song they all recognized came on. “Okay!” Y/N hopped up from her chair. “We’ll resume this after we dance!”
.•.•.•.•.•.•.
The Bachelor Party
Spencer begged the guys not to take him to a strip club or anywhere where he could see some other girl’s… body parts. He didn’t want that on his conscience when he said I Do in 48 hours.
So, they ended up in Rossi’s backyard with beers and a ping pong table. Hotch was currently beating Rossi’s ass at the game and Morgan and Spencer were watching.
“So… have you asked her yet?” Derek asked after a sip of beer.
Spencer sighed and shook his head. “N-no.”
Derek tilted his head. “Why not?”
The man took a sip of his beer and cleared his throat. “I just—“ He sighed and shook his head. “I’m scared she’ll say no.”
The other man chuckled. “Well, you don’t know if you don’t ask.” He shrugged.
Spencer rolled his eyes. “I just— we only been together for a year and 10 months. I have no idea if she’s ready to let me adopt Eloise.”
He hummed and clicked his tongue. “Didn’t you tell me that she said you were great with her? And thy she told you that you don’t need to ask her permission to let Eloisey do things. And you accidentally called her your daughter and… Y/N didn’t even flinch.”
Spencer nodded. “You’re right. I’m totally just over thinking it.”
“Reid!” Rossi called. He snapped out of his conversation with Derek and looked at the smiling man. “Get over here and have some fun or I’m taking you to get drunk!”
Spencer looked at Derek with a smile before he rolled his eyes and got up from his chair.
The Bachelorette Party
In total, Y/N had received 15 sets of lingerie. She was thankful but also a little worried for her body. She also got a blue pendant necklace that all of the BAU girls pitched in for her ‘something blue’.
After all of the presents, the party was over. Emily and JJ were trying to keep Y/N upright while walking to the can and Penelope was holding all of the presents.
It was a good idea to schedule the party two days before the wedding because there was no doubt that she’d wake up with a massive hangover.
“Where’s m’kid?” She slurred. Emily groaned when Y/N almost slipped in a puddle of water on the sidewalk.
“She’s with Hotch’s babysitter.” She nodded. “Remember? With Jack and Henry.”
“Ooooooohhhhhh.” Y/N nodded with a giggle. She leaned into Emily. “Can I tell you a secret?” She asked loudly, thinking that she was whispering.
“Sure…?” Emily gave a look to JJ.
Y/N laughed. “Eloisey’s got a crush on JJ’s kid!” She doubled over and stomped her foot.
Penelope sighed. “It’s gonna be hilarious to see Reid trying to deal with his drunk Mrs!” She laughed.
Y/N almost spun around completely. “Shhh! He won’t know I’m drunk, ‘nelope! So don’t say any words, m’kay!?”
The bubbly blonde nodded. “Oh… of course not!”
.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.
Spencer and the guys had ended up going to a bar because Derek believed that a bachelor party should be more fun than it was.
So, they all loaded up in cars and went to the nearest one. Spencer had one drink and wanted to leave because he knew that Y/N would be getting home soon from her party.
He asked Rossi to drive him home and he waited for her to get home. When she did get home, he didn’t expect her to be as absolutely wasted as she was.
The door flew open and Emily groaned when Y/N ripped her arms out of her and JJ’s hands. She stumbled inside the apartment, her eyes landing on Spencer who was reading a book. “Spencer!” She gasped. “Oh my gosh! What are you doing here!?”
Spencer stood up, glancing at Emily, JJ, and then Garcia. “I live here, baby.” He chuckled, walking towards her. “How much did you drink?” He asked, mainly talking to Emily and the other girls.
JJ sighed. “Eight shots of vodka and four ‘zombies’.” She snorted.
Spencer furrowed his brows as he walked forward to take his fiancé from them. “What’s a zombie?” He asked.
Y/N giggled. “It’s a loooooooot of alcohol.” She nodded, wrapping her arms around his neck and going limp in his arms. “Where’s my other baby?” She asked, nuzzling into his chest.
He reached down, grunting and grabbing her ankle to take off her high heels. “She— jeez— she’s with Jack and Henry and then your mom is going to pick her up from Hotch’s house.”
Y/N whimpered a bit. “But I wanna…” She paused and sighed. “I wanna see her…”
Spencer nodded as he struggled to take her other heel off. “I know baby. You’ll see her tomorrow!” He smiled, kissing her cheek.
“Are you okay here, Reid?” Garcia asked, hearing the woman sing horribly into his chest as he took off her heel.
He tossed her shoe behind him onto the couch. “Yeah, we’re okay! Thank you for taking care of her.” He smiled.
Garcia took all of the bags and walked towards the coat closet. “You don’t get to look in these bags, Mister. Understand?” She opened the door and shoved them inside.
Y/N nodded against him. “Yeah, Mr. Vagina wizard! No looking!” She patted his chest and slurred her giggles.
“Okay, I won’t look.” He blushed madly at her drunken words as he ignored the laughs coming from his coworkers.
The girls said their goodbyes to the drunk woman and Spencer and left. Y/N was mumbling nonsense to Spencer and he sat her down on the couch and left to the kitchen to get her a glass of water.
“How was y- your parrrrtyyy?” She asked, her head rolling backwards onto the back of the couch.
Spencer chuckled and walked back into the living room. “It was good. Not as good as your though, apparently.”
Y/N shook her head and then frowned all of the sudden. “Did you… did y’see any… boobs?” She asked, opening her eyes just a bit.
The man shook his head and sat down next to her. “No. I didn’t see any.”
“Any butts?”
“Nope.”
“Mr. Chocolate didn’t take you to see any strippers?” She asked, sitting up and grabbing his shoulders.
Spencer shook his head. “No strippers.” She smiled at this and laid her head into his chest. “You gotta get to bed, okay?” He patted her back twice and then leaned her upright.
“Whyyyyyyy?” She whined, trying to poke his face. He moved away once but saw that she was persistent so let her do what she was trying to do.
Spencer smiled. “Because tomorrow you have Eloisey pick up, your nail appointment, your dress pick up, your eyebrow appointment, and then something else but you won’t tell me what it is.”
She giggled and bit her lip. “I’m getting a Brazilian wax!” She pretty much slapped his chest in excitement.
He rolled his eyes with a smile and stood up, bringing her with him. “Then, we have our rehearsal and dinner with everyone. Will you go to bed, please?” He chuckled.
“Can I have a kiss, please?” She asked, closing her eyes and puckering her lips.
“Yes.” He leaned down and kissed her shortly. He pulled away.
“That was not a very good kiss, mister.” She shook her head.
Spencer rubbed across her cheeks bone with his thumb. “I’ll give you a better one when you wake up, okay?” She smiled and nodded.
“Will you go to bed with me? I wanna cuddle you.” She whispered.
“Of course, baby.”
It took five whole minutes to get to the bedroom, Y/N was hard to control. She kept trying to slow dance with him in the middle of the floor. At one point he did because she started crying saying, “it’s rehearsal for our first dance! You have two left feet!”
Once he got her into bed, he stripped her of her dress and put some pajama pants and one of his shirts on her. He tied her hair back and away from her face because he knew how much she hated her hair getting in her way while she was sleeping.
She was very happy when he finally laid down next to her after changing from his clothes because that meant she could practically lay on top of him. “Missed you, Spence.” She whispered after hiding her face in the crook of his neck.
He rubbed her head before running his hand down her back. “I missed you too, baby.”
“Hey guess what, Spence,”
“What?”
“You’re really hot.”
He just laughed and shushed her.
.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.
The next morning, Y/N woke up to a bottle of water and a few advil on her bedside table. She groaned and rolled over expecting to see her fiancé there looking angelic as always when he was sleeping.
But he wasn’t there.
She furrowed her eyebrows and felt the dull aching of her head become stronger. “Ohhhhhhhhh fuck.” She sighed, groaning loudly.
She sat up and let her head fall into her hands. She stilled for a moment before realizing that her room was a bit too lit up.
She looked over at the clock on her table.
10:30 am
She was supposed to pick Eloise up from her mother’s at 9:00.
“Shit!” She stumbled out of bed and raced out of her bedroom.
She almost ran to the front door but paused when she saw Spencer cooking something in the kitchen and Eloise was dancing around the living room.
Spencer looked up from the frying pan. “Good morning— I uh… didn’t expect you to be up yet.” He said, ducking down to look at the clock on the stove.
“Morning mommy!” Eloise squealed.
She smiled down and squinted at her daughter. “Morning, baby!” She said quietly. “Did you…” She looked up at Spencer.
He nodded. “I didn’t want to wake you so I just went to get her and now I’m making you guys breakfast.”
Y/N crossed her arms and smiled as she walked towards him. “You’re the best. And I love you.” She mumbled.
He grinned, holding his arms out. She walked into them and squeezed him so tight. “How drunk was I?” She asked.
“Verrry drunk.” He kissed her head. “You forced me to slow dance with you.” He chuckled.
Y/N giggled and inhaled his familiar scent. Coffee, and cologne. “Thank you.”
“For what?” He asked, rubbing her back.
“For being you.” She answered after a short pause.
Spencer smiled. “Well, I’ll always be me. But, you’ve got to eat and then get ready for all of your appointments today.”
“Spenther! Is bweakfast weady!?” Eloise asked from the living room. “I’m a very hungry girl, otay?”
Spencer chuckled. “Yes, it’s ready. Do you wanna come and sit in your chair?”
Eloise pattered into the kitchen. “Duh, Spenther.” She rolled her eyes and climbed up on the pink chair.
Y/N smiled and shook her head. “Are you excited to have a girls day with mommy?” She asked, sitting in the chair next to her as Spencer began plating the food.
“Yeth! I so excited to get my nails done wif you!” She nodded, eyes lighting up. She paused. “Wait. I dotta go wash m’hands!” She scurried out of the kitchen to the bathroom.
Spencer leaned over his fiancé’s shoulder. “So, what’s she gonna do when you’re getting your… Brazilian?” He whispered. She could feel his smirk against her ear.
She turned to him, lips centimeters apart. “How did you know about that!?” She asked, watching him set a plate down in front of her.
He kissed her, leaving her head a bit dizzy. “Let’s just say, you like to overshare when you drink.” He whispered against her lips. She chased after his lips as he pulled away but he got too far and she pouted, turning around and picking up her fork.
Eloise rushed back into the kitchen and sat in her pink chair, excited to eat.
Y/N cleared her throat. “She will be with Penelope, for your information.”
Spencer smiled and sat across from her. “Oh, in that case, can I come watch?”
She furrowed her brows. “I really don’t think you wanna see hair getting ripped off my va-jay-jay.” She shook her head and Spencer laugh loudly, almost startling Eloise.
.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.
The day went absolutely perfect. Eloise and Y/N had gotten their nails painted, Eloise played with another little girl while her mother was getting her eyebrows done, Penelope picked up Eloise and took her for ice cream while Y/N was getting her soul snatched with hot wax and now, the mother and daughter pair were on their way to pick up their dresses. They got them and then she and Eloise went out to lunch. She wanted to explain what was going to change around the house and who she would be staying with after the wedding.
She watched her daughter with a smile as she munched on her chicken strips. “So, Eloisey…” She started. The girl looked up. “Remember when I told you what getting married was?” She asked.
Eloise nodded and her eyes out up. “It means that I get to wear a pretty dwess and frow fwowers at people.”
Y/N’s head titled to the side. “Yeah, somethin’ like that.” She giggled. “Spencer and I are going to go on a little trip. Just for a couple of days.”
Eloise looked up. “Where we goin’?” She asked, almost biting her finger in the process of eating.
The mother sighed and reached across the table. “Baby, you… you aren’t going.” She shook her head. She couldn’t find any nicer words. “I’m sorry, baby. You’ll get to stay with grandma and grandpa.” Her shoulders tensed.
Eloisey face screwed up into anger. “I wan’ go, mommy!” She shouted.
“Eloise, you can’t go.” Y/N said quietly after shushing her. The girl sat back, crossing her arms. “It’s for three days, baby. I promise I’ll call you every single day we’re gone and I’ll even bring you back a present!”
The girl’s face lit up. “I wike pwesents, mommy.” She nodded.
Y/N smiled. “I know you do, baby.”
——————————————————
Yayyyyyyy
I live this chapter and I’m sooooooo excited for the next chapter which will be the wedding! I decided to break it up into 2 parts
Thank y’all for reading and I love ya bunches❤️❤️❤️
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#spencer reid#spencer fluff#spencer reid imagine#spencer reid smut#criminal minds imagine#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid x original female character#criminal minds#spencer x oc#spencer x reader#crimimal minds#spencer x you#love your body
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If you don’t mind me asking, one question I have that you might be able to answer (seeing as your pretty much the Cass expert around here) - how often has her age relative to the rest of the batkids been brought up in canon?
I’m just curious because every now and then I see it mentioned that she’s around the same age if not slightly older than Jason, which always sort of throws me off a little given how she’s more often paired with Tim and Steph. I guess I’m just curious if you know whether or not this was just something mentioned once and then forgotten about or whether or not this has been a more consistent part of her character.
You're actually insanely lucky you asked me this question tonight, because I had a twitter conversation that prompted me to go hunt down relevant panels and information about this very thing about a month ago. tl;dr: post-Crisis!Cass is the second-eldest Wayne kid and generally written as such; she's consistently two and a half years older than Tim, at least a year older than Steph, and seven months older than Jason legally (and one year older biologically, since Jason was dead for around six months). The only Batkid older than her is Dick.
Canonically, the age gaps between the (pre-reboot) Batfam look something like this:
Depending on which age retcon you prefer (post-Zero Hour or post-Batgirl: Year One), Barbara is either 6-7 years older than Dick or 3-4 years older.
Dick and Jason are approximately 6-7 years apart. Dick is 18-19 when Jason is adopted at 12 and thus 21-ish three years later when Jason dies at 15.
Cass is 7 months older calendar-wise than Jason; biologically she's about a year older, since Jason spent ~6 months dead
Tim is around two years younger than Jason: Tim was 13 when he was introduced a few months in-universe after Jason died at 15. By the end of the post-Crisis universe, Tim is 17 (potentially 18, depending on when Gates of Gotham takes place).
Stephanie is one year older than Tim. This has been confirmed on several occasions, but most notably Steph is explicitly 18 and a college freshman in her Batgirl run, when Tim was 17.
There's 6-7 years between Damian and Tim. Tim is 17 during his Red Robin run and Damian is ~11 by the end of the 2009 Batman & Robin run, though he never turns 11 on-panel.
Those are still the basic age gap guideposts, regardless of "on-panel" post-Flashpoint age retcons. Dick is the sticky one here, mostly because writers could never decide on a) what age he was when his parents died and b) how long he was Robin before becoming Nightwing. Dick's age is also complicated by Tim's backstory, because it gets really sticky if he's too old for Tim to have been in the audience when the Graysons fell.
Anyway...Cass. Cass was 17 in Batgirl (2000) #1; Tim had just turned 15 and was living with his father. While her age isn't consistently brought up, she was treated as a mature older teenager who switches between living with Barbara and independently in the 'cave' that Bruce gives her. We also know she's 18 by 2002 because of Batgirl #33, the issue where Cain tells Cass that her real birthday is January 26th, and Batgirl #37, where she formally turns 18; Tim is still 15 at the time.
Tim turns 16 on July 19th in Robin #116, published in 2003. This once again indicates that Cass is approximately two and a half years older than Tim. This is further confirmed by Batgirl #48 in 2004, where Bruce mentions that Cass is 18, and the fallout of War Games later that year, since Cass relocates to a new apartment in Bludhaven without all of the messy convoluted legal hoops a 16-year-old Tim jumps through to do the same.
As for Cass and Jason, that's discussed in Detective Comics #790, also published in 2004. Bruce takes Cass to Jason's grave on what would have been Jason's 18th birthday, August 16th:
"No one talks about him. All I know is...he was the second Robin. And that the Joker kil-" "He would have been eighteen today." -Detective Comics #790
Ages are always a bit difficult to parse in comics, but this issue confirmed that Cass and Jason were around the same age. While we were never explicitly told whether Cass was 18 or 19 in this scene, we have a very important context clue that provides the answer: Cass's birthday, January 26th.
This would make Cass still 18 during Tec #790, around 7 months older than Jason should have been. This would also keep the correct age gap between both Cass & Tim (since Tim had just turned 16) and Jason & Tim (since they're two years apart). This is further confirmed by Jason being around 19-20 during Under the Red Hood (which I previously puzzled out here), published the following year in 2005. This makes Cass vaguely 20-21 during the Reborn era, since we know that Tim is 17 (nearly 18) and Steph is solidly 18.
In terms of writing, Cass was consistently treated as a slightly "older" character. Tim and Steph were a bit of a matched set even though they were a year apart, but Cass's stories were always pitched for a slightly older and more mature character than theirs. Any writers engaging in infantilizing behavior tended to do so because they were trying to make points about Cass's social skills, not her age. Cass being grouped in with Tim and Steph rather than Jason had more to do with Jason being dead until 2005 and a villain until 2011 than it did age considerations.
So then we get to the post-Flashpoint universe, where we have to throw literally everything I just said out because welcome to the reboot, where the timeline is made up and the ages don't matter:
Cass was re-introduced in Batman and Robin Eternal, where she is explicitly noted to be 16. Stephanie and Tim were both about 17, since Tim's college application arc in Detective Comics Rebirth puts him at 17-18.
But Cass is written as slightly older than Duke during the 2019 Outsiders run, and Duke was 16 when he was introduced and supposed to be slightly younger than Tim and Steph.
Then we run into Tim's "eternally 17" issue compounded with DC actually allowing Damian to age (first to 13 in 2016 and then to 14 in 2021), which throws literally everyone else's timeline into whack.
We also get the Infinite Frontier era allowing Dick and Babs to be in their late 20s again (vs. being 21, like they both had been since 2011) while also dealing with the Batgirls writers admitting they thought both Cass and Steph were 13-14 before being corrected (which explains a lot about how they're written right now).
If all the information I just threw at you confuses you, congratulations: it confuses everyone else, too. Don't worry too much about it. This is why most people ignore any on-panel age considerations we've been given since 2011 and go with pre-reboot ages. Anyway, Duke is now in college as of Urban Legends #18. Logically Cass, Steph, and Tim should thus all be between 20-22 right now, if the timeline actually made sense. Accounting for basic pre-reboot age differences+new age considerations, here's where everyone SHOULD be:
Babs: early 30s
Dick: 28-29
Cass: 23
Jason: 22-23
Steph: 21-22
Tim: 20-21
Duke: 18 (confirmed)
Damian: 14 (confirmed)
............yeah. That's clearly not how they're all being written, but that's the best age approximations I can come up with based on the super convoluted and contradictory information we've been given over the past 11 years. Love how canon is instead acting like Cass and Steph are 13-14 (but still getting less mature storylines than the actual 14-year-old), Tim is eternally 17, Jason is somehow 21 and 35 at the same time, Dick is forever in his mid-20s, and no one knows whether Babs is supposed to be 21 or in her 30s. I hope this answers your question sufficiently despite all of the confusing info!
#rip sorry for that info dump because that was probably way more information than you probably wanted#cassandra cain#dc comics#tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#damian wayne#stephanie brown#duke thomas#barbara gordon#long post#batfam meta#batman meta#cassandra cain meta#tim drake meta#jason todd meta#asks
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December 8, 2023 -
Jk goes live days before enlistment! As he walks back to his place, he mentions that “crazy fans” are at the front of his home these days, and reminds them (even though he shouldn’t have to, people really should learn respect and boundaries) not to come.
Timestamp 3:48
To compound this point, and how under a microscope members are, someone shouts out as he walks back to his home, “Kim Taehyung,” which causes Jk to look back, before he says he won’t show his (shaved) hair.
Timestamp 4:58
https://x.com/kookieantae4eva/status/1733541288413429887?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Back at his home, Jk shares that he got Bam in Daegu (and how sweet is it that Jk picked the puppy who couldn’t drink his mom’s milk?) -
Timestamp 14:09
Which, of course, naturally made myself and everyone else flashback to when Daegu-born Taehyung shared this precious photo of him and Daegu-born puppy Bam on Weverse, and wrote that he raised Bam since he was young -
And during Festa 2021, Tae had commented he wanted to find a friend for Tannie, but his dad may hesitate about him getting a second dog. Jk had smiled knowingly and said his dad would meet the dog and “love it.”
Recap of Tae’s Weverse post - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2021/668193486339801088/november-16-2021
Recap of Festa 2021 - https://www.tumblr.com/taekooktimeline2021/654793371031928832/start-of-may-mid-may-2021
Festa 2021 raw link - https://youtu.be/wRWMeT6ykFU?si=GJpgCuj35GGhnuFw, Timestamp for conversation is 13:03
With only fifteen minutes left in his live, Jk informs viewers that he’s sweaty and he’s going to change. As he steps off camera, he sings BTS’ “blood sweat sweat & tears” but he changes it to “blood, sweat, get it out.”
Timestamp 1:16:11
https://x.com/nonakv99/status/1733116445737861282?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg https://x.com/camthkim/status/1733112709363933441?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Translation -
As noted above, Jk’s change of lyrics is a direct reference to Jinny’s Kitchen: Team Building (S1, 2023), when Wooshik (Wooga member, actor and Tae’s friend) made a mistake during the God of Communication game. Jk changing BTS’ lyrics to Wooshik’s indicates Jk watched the two-part series.
https://x.com/vitaemintae/status/1733115070559969456?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
https://x.com/tkkslayy/status/1733116530039345225?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Jk originally was wearing this outfit when he first started his live -
But when there were only about 13 minutes left of his live, he emerges from off camera in a new outfit, his “fight for love” Rloveution pride collection sweater. Interestingly, after changing into this sweater, he sings three snippets of Taehyung’s “Layover” songs. He didn’t change out of his “sweaty” clothes for over an hour, so I find this to be a statement, but please decide as you like.
Timestamp 1:17:23 (when he sits back down)
Outfit -
Jk asks what he should do, then starts singing Tae’s “slow dancing.”
Timestamp 1:18:55 - 1:19:40
https://x.com/_k91230v_/status/1733114210887033334?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Accepting various requests, he sings brief excerpts such as BTS’s “Let Go.” However, he refuses to sing “Magic Shop,” explaining that it’s too high (refer to the screenshot below), though he expresses willingness to listen to it. Immediately after, he spontaneously sings a snippet from another of Tae’s songs, specifically “Love Me Again,” with the lyrics “love me again…love…nobody else.”
Timestamp 1:23:26 - 1:23:32
https://x.com/_k91230v_/status/1733115083721740545?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
He seamlessly performs a series of song snippets, beginning with the word “euphoria” and transitioning to “louder than bombs I break.” Following that, he melodiously croons, “rainy days, I’m thinking ‘bout you,” blending words and melody while swaying to the rhythm. Notably, this is from Tae’s creation, “Rainy Days,” featured in his solo debut album “Layover.” Subsequently, he skillfully weaves in the words “fake love” and a snippet of “my you,” followed by a diverse array of snippets from various other songs.
Timestamp 1:24:24 - 1:24:36
https://x.com/_k91230v_/status/1733115465634111888?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Compilation of Jk singing three of Tae’s songs - https://x.com/eri_purpledream/status/1733117037030133875?s=46&t=StSwHjW0_Domk_lHUFMaCg
Raw - https://weverse.io/bts/live/3-142418350
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Here are some pencil sketches I am finalizing this weekend in a lovely pattern for visual chaos and writing that is equally chaotic.
netherworldpost.com is set to launch in the autumn of 2023 -- the same timeline we've had for... months? a year?
The mailing list is active at the address now if you like email updates.
I'm very excited
and a bit nervous
mostly excited
I mention the timeline above because if you've been here for awhile, you may remember we had 2 or 3 false starts and push-backs.
As someone who is a recovering "work-work-work-make-it-work-24/7/365," I initially went down the typical path of "move fast, break things" then I slowed myself down to "move methodically, speed irrelevant" and then would get frustrated proclaim "NO WE MUST GO FASTER" and then things would start falling apart.
All of this is to say.
In the last several months I have successfully resisted returning to the "move fast, break things" model -- there is a company mechanism that when I get too antsy, I stop drawing and writing and planning for a minimum of 48 hours to cool down.
Not... a traditional start-up model... but we have a singular investor (hi, it's me) and they (hi!) are satisfied with this model. The whole "being alive is neat and there is so much joy in the world" aspect.
Returning to sense-making.
I have a box I keep next to my desk with printed proofs. So come autumn of 2023, we're going to launch.
If it is with 7 faux postage stamps and 5 greeting cards, so be it.
If it is with 10 faux postage stamps, 15 greeting cards, 2 zines, so be it.
If it is with 13 faux postage stamps, 20 greeting cards, 5 zines, 3 notebooks, so be it -- you know what you get the picture and I'm writing like I'm being paid by the word here.
(For the record I'm not paid by the word I just. Like. To talk. Ironically in posting format, I'm actually fairly quiet, except in posting broadly or one-on-one diner situations.)
"There is always another October, and every day can be Halloween."
I say this to myself a lot.
It keeps me focused.
We launch in the autumn, probably smaller than I would like, but we'll be open, and once that happens, we can expand -- methodically, speed irrelevant.
Coffee is ready.
Back to work.
I am grateful to every autumnal heart that actively makes this all possible to exist.
I hope we make something that brings you wonder and joy.
netherworldpost.com
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through the hourglass 62. brb x oc
a/n: no ROOSTER in this chapter ;-; but there will be ON THE NEXT EHE
pairing: plus size!oc x rooster
warnings: mentions of eric. OHB OY
goodness gracious (pls read this one to know more what this fic is about!!)
chapter
1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44/
45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61
(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!! )
taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix
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@emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads @bigpoppajes @taytaylala12
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-
The first few hours without Rooster were fine, Nicole was quiet, she was used to not having her dad during the mornings after all. Beatrice was thankful that their daughter was such a calm baby most of the time, either too busy looking around with interest or trying to grab the mobile above her head as it moved in circles.
But as the day went by, Nicole got fussy, the closer it got to Rooster’s return time the eager she got, kicking and waving her arms and legs, letting out happy squeals because she somehow knew that Rooster would walk past the front door and kiss her cheeks over and over before picking her up. Beatrice just frowned as she watched from the sink, seeing her little daughter just wriggling out of pure excitement about having her father back soon.
Beatrice looked up at the clock on the wall seeing that indeed he’d be home soon if he was still in California. Maybe Nicole wouldn’t mind it too much, maybe she’d act just like when they both go to the Hard Deck…she hoped so at least.
But alas, that wasn’t what happened.
When the clock’s hands moved to the specific time that Rooster got home,Nicole stopped moving - as if she wanted to hear his steps as he got into the house - and waited. Beatrice felt so bad, chewing her lower lip at the expectative look on her daughter’s face, “Nikki,daddy isn’t home, he’s going to be away for three months.” she knew her daughter couldn’t understand but she couldn’t not tell her about it.
Nicole just moved her light green eyes to Beatrice, then back to where she knew the door was even though she couldn’t see it. “Nikki, I–” how does someone explain that to an infant? There was no way she’d understand, but Nikki’s face slowly scrunched and soft hiccups broke out of her throat when she didn’t see her father, “Oh no,no,no, no,Nikki.” Beatrice rushes to the bouncer just as Nicole’s hiccups got longer and high pitched into gentle crying.
She picks the baby up, holding Nicole against her chest,bouncing and shushing her the best she could but it wasn’t working. Especially when Beatrice turns around and Nicole’s eyes meet the front door and only the front door.
It was the very first time that Nicole cried so loud.
And it pained Beatrice immensely, “No,no, it’s okay, it’s okay,” her eyes stung as her daughter cried loud and she felt the hot tears touching her neck, Nicole’s tiny fists clenching her mother’s shirt, “Sssh,sshh,it’s okay, it’s okay baby,I know.” her voice cracked and she wiped her own eye with her sleeve covered shoulder, “It’s okay, it’s okay, I know,I know you miss him. I miss him too.”
More crying, she could feel how hot her daughter’s cheeks were because of the blood flow rising to her face. Nicole was heartbroken just by her crying, it was the worst thing she had ever heard, “Nikki,ssshhh,it’s okay.” she kept bouncing the infant, walking around the kitchen with the dogs following her since they heard the crying as well, “It’s okay, sshhh,it’s okay…”
Nicole’s crying slowly faltered to gentle whimpers, tears clung to those long lashes and her tiny chest convulsed with hiccups, only being able to let out a quiet whine after a while. Beatrice cautiously turned her head to check on her daughter, seeing that there were tears still in her eyes but she stopped crying completely, “...oh,birdie,” she whispers, kissing her daughter’s head, ‘It’s okay.” she knew deep inside it wasn’t, she knew that Nicole couldn’t understand why her father who stayed close from the second she was born wasn’t there by her side.
Her mother just bounced her in her arms for a few more minutes,kissing that fluffy hair that was now leaning more to a dark sandy brown color much like her father. And the comparison only made Bea frown a bit more, “I’ll have to talk to him and check when we’ll be able to chat, so you can see him too, you know?” Nicole whined again, earning another kiss to her head, “It’s okay, birdie, it’s okay.”
Nicole’s cries dissipated into nothing, her tiny hands holding onto Beatrice’s shirt still and her soft cheek squished on Beatrice’s shoulder. Her mother rubbed her back soothingly, heart still hurting from seeing her cry so much.
When she went to put her back on her bouncer,Nicole cried out in complaint and Beatrice pulled her back up so she could be close to her chest, “Okay, you don’t want to be there, that’s fine.” she murmured, “But mommy has to clean some stuff,birdie.” she explains, “I think I can…um…well…” she could wrap Nicole against her body as she cleaned the house, she had learned a few wrap carries from youtube videos that she wore whenever they had to go out.
Beatrice sighed, adjusting her baby in her arms as she walked up the staircase to Nicole’s nursery, turning on the lights and gently placing her on the changing table. She stays close in case she cries out but she doesn’t, she just keeps her mother in her sights all the time.
Soon enough Beatrice hears the sound of her phone, the same one she kept downstairs, “Ugh, fuck.” she groans, flexing her hands and then picking Nicole back up, “Sorry,sweetie, mommy is all over the place. We just need to…ugh, okay, maybe– Ellie!”
Eleanor scrambles up the staircase and almost hits her ribs on the threshold, stopping with her ears perked up and pink nose turned to where Beatrice was, “I know this is a bit weird, but you love grabbing things…can you get me my phone? It’s in my bag,” she moves her hand on her chest as if to show the position the bag usually is when she’s holding, “My bag, you know it,right? You know what it is.”
The white pup blinks up at her, wags her tail for a bit then bolts downstairs. Her hurried paws echo all around the house and Beatrice could hear her sniffing about trying to find the one thing her owner asked her to get.
Beatrice just waited, while looking down at Nicole, frowning at the tear tracks on her soft and small face and the gentle sniffling she still had going on. Beatrice refused to tell Rooster about this because she knew if she did he’d blame himself immediately and that’s not what she wanted especially when he’s so far away.
She didn’t know when they’d be able to talk, he left early this morning after all, but she hoped it’d be soon because of Nicole’s reaction of his absence. She knew Nicole didn’t like when they weren’t home, but thy managed to work through it by sending her to Bea’s parents, she was now used to her mother’s absence during that specific period of time.
But Rooster’s situation was a bit different.
Nicole didn’t understand because she’s just a baby who just turned a month old, she’s used on having both of her parents close by at all times and not to mention, she has a strong connection with both. In her little baby mind it made no sense why her father wouldn’t be home by the time he should be.
Beatrice’s worried thoughts stopped when she heard the tinkling of her xenomorph keychain swinging and Eleanor’s clipped nails clicking on the floor. The white dog stood by the door with the strap of Beatrice’s bag held tightly between her large maws, curved tail wagging “Ellie!You got it!” Beatrice’s tone only makes the dog’s tail wags harder and she wiggles her way inside, dropping the bag on the brunette’s feet and then rolling on the floor to show her pink tummy, “You are such a good girl, thank you! Thank you!”
Beatrice gives her some belly rubs before Eleanor rolls back to stand on her paws, watching with curiosity as Beatrice opens the bag to pull out her phone, “Thank you Ellie,I’ll give you treats downstairs, okay?” Eleanor’s tail stops wagging and she barks out a complaint, “Ellie! Later, I promise okay? Don’t worry,you’ll get it.”
She could swear the pup’s eyes were narrowed in disbelief but she turned around and left the room with a trot. Beatrice sighs, tossing her back to the rocking chair as she checks her phone with her free hand still on top of Nicole’s chest.
Her daughter’s small palm touched the back of her finger, holding the digit close and tight as her mother checked what set her phone off.
Beatrice couldn’t see much yet, checking all her messages and seeing that four of them were from the girls’ group chat,two were from Hangman who took on the mantle of ‘worried uncle and honorary older brother’ asking if she was okay and the last one from her mother who let her know that she was coming over later to bring her dinner.
She smiles in thanks, typing out messages for everyone until Shells’ name popped on the screen, interrupting her typing.
Shells (16:34)
Babes!! Are you home?
Bea (16:34)
Yeah,I am…why?
Shells (16:35)
I’m coming over. We need to talk about something and I’m bringing Ev with me!
Cue to Shells sending a picture of herself and Evelyn inside Shells’ buick, their taller friend holding several bubble teas on her lap while giving the blonde an ugly look
Bea (16:36)
Wait,what? Why? Is everything okay?
Shells (16:36)
You’ll see! Love you!
Beatrice just stared down at the phone in silence,blinking quietly and then furrowing her brows, only looking away when she heard Nicole’s soft noises from her changing table. “Sorry,birdie.” she says sweetly, pocketing her phone into her jeans, “Your aunt Shells is coming over with your aune Evelyn.” Maybe that would help her cheer up, she liked Shells and Evelyn a lot more now that she was used to them.
She was confused as to why Shells was coming over considering they’ve seen each other earlier that day while cleaning the bar…and why she was coming with Evelyn. But Beatrice didn’t have much time to think about it because the doorbell rang and Eleanor started barking like crazy, “They are already here?!” she pulls out her phone to check the camera app and in fact, it was Shells and Evelyn, with Shells waving at the camera with a huge smile.
Beatrice opens the mic to talk through her phone, “I thought you guys would arrive much later.”
“She stepped on the gas to get here.” Evelyn explains as Beatrice walks down the stairs with Nicole against her chest, “She really wanted to get here soon.”
“With good reason! Come on,Bea!Come on, we gotta celebrate!”
What the hell was going on?
Beatrice slides her phone back inside her pocket after gently pushing Eleanor away and opening the front door. “Ah!Bumblebea!” Shells is grinning so wide it’s like her face will split in half, “Hi,Nikki! Hi! It’s me your favorite auntie!” Nicole just blinked at the blonde but did hold onto her finger as she wagged it in front of her face, “Ah,she’s so cute, here Ev, let me grab it.”
She takes the bubble teas from Evelyn’s hands and marches past Beatrice inside her house. The brunette looks back to where her friend was humming and then looks back at Evelyn, “...what is happening?”
“I have no idea.” Evelyn says as she walks in so Beatrice could close the door, “She showed up at my place and ordered me to come down, didn’t say why, just said we were going to see you and that it was going to be great.”
“...that’s worrisome.”
“No kidding.” Evelyn mutters, the two of them walking along to the kitchen where they could hear Shells’ happy humming, “Anyway,how are you? I know Rooster left this morning.”
Beatrice smiles weakly, giving her friend a shrug, “...well it’s…I’m used to it.”
“But Nicole isn’t.”
“No.” comes out as a groan as she looks down at her daughter, “Cried so much when she didn’t see Rooster walk through the door, broke my heart,Ev.”
Evelyn stays silent for a bit, but Beatrice sees her friend’s jaw move and her lips curl into her mouth. She had a feeling that hearing brought back memories from her own childhood when her father was gone for a long time and since Rooster told her that Cyclone first held Evelyn when she was already one year old it probably made her a bit uncomfortable to think about it again, “...It’ll be fine.” she finally says, breaking the silence between them, “She’ll be okay.”
“I hope so.”
“You and Rooster are raising her well when it comes to that topic,” there’s a hidden bitterness in her words, undoubtedly from the time when she was younger, “She’ll understand. Plus, when he calls,she’ll be able to see him.”
“Yeah, that’s true.”
“Do you plan on telling him about her reaction?”
“No, absolutely not.” Beatrice shakes her head while changing Nicole’s position to her other shoulder, “He’ll just feel guilty and I don’t want that.”
“Are you two coming or what?” Shells’ voice interrupts them,”Come on!”
Both women looked at each other then stepped a bit faster to the kitchen where Shells had somehow found a bag of spicy chips that she poured into a bowl, “What’s the celebration for?” Beatrice asks, grabbing a chip herself and sitting down when Shells flaps her hand as if telling her to do so.
“Yeah,I want to know why I was yanked out of my house as well,” Evelyn comments with her arms folded on top of the table,”Considering you said absolutely nothing.”
Shells had that little smile on her face, the one that she often had that reminded them of ‘Dennis the Menace’ for some odd reason. She crunched her chip with the same smile, grabbing the bubble teas she left in the fridge and placing them in front of her friends, “Mango for Bea and Ube for Evelyn.” she ignored her friends’ confused stares, sipping her own strawberry one and popping the bubbles in her mouth.
The blonde waits for a little bit, then she waits until both of them were sipping the cold treat to finally say “So, do you guys remember Beatrice’s ex? The one who ruined her life and still tried to act like he had a chance? Well he messaged me and asked me about you.”
Beatrice stopped drinking, glad she didn’t choke on the bubble at the sudden mention of her ex-boyfriend, “W-What?”
“Yeah,he messaged me on insta. Asked me about you,all that shit.”
Evelyn’s eyes narrowed, “Are you serious?”
“Dead serious,babes.”
There’s silence because they never expected to hear about Eric again, nor knowing that he messaged Shells. Shells. The one person he is scared of from the second he met her years ago. Beatrice just looks at the white bubbles in her cup, seeing the red and yellow liquids mix inside as she takes in what Shells said, “...what did he want?”
“He wanted to know about you, wanted to know how you were.” Shells looked so happy, “I told him you were probably busy giving Rooster attention,wink-wink, and he got pissed about it. Said I was in the whole scheme, it was crazy.”
“Scheme?”
“I think he still believes you are just,” she shrugs, “Not…really married to Rooster. I think he thinks it’s all a great joke being played on him.”
“That’s insane.” Evelyn says, giving Beatrice a worried look, “Why the fuck would he do that?”
“Because Eric thinks he’s better than everyone, there’s no one who could best him and he likes to feel superior to others.” she explains while running her fingers on Nicole’s hair, “...but it’s…why would he do that? Why would he message you?”
“Beats the hell outta me,babes.” Shells shrugs, “I just cussed him out and told him if he ever did this again I’d kick his balls so hard he’d cough pubic hair.” and she says that with a smile, extremely pleased with herself, slurping her tea with the same grin.
Beatrice didn’t like how he showed up again. She thought that after she broke his nose, after he ran away from her at the reunion, he wouldn’t consider on asking about her or trying to see how she was again. “I don’t get it.” she mutters with a gentle shake of her head, “Why would he do this? It makes no sense.’
“I agree,”Evelyn says while supporting her chin on the back of her hand, “Why would he try to reach out to you now? Especially after everything.”
“Maybe it’s the universe aligning so Rooster can beat the shit out of him.” Shells suggests, “Wouldn’t that be fun?”
It would.
But Beatrice just chewed her lower lip, “It’s been…what, two years since I last saw him? It’s so odd to me, guys. It’s like he can’t believe I am married,it’s like he doesn’t get it.”
“Maybe he’s just stupid.”
Shells and her colorful commentary never ceased to amuse them but Beatrice looked…annoyed and worried at the same time. Why the hell is he still trying to get information out of her? That makes absolutely no sense. And she didn’t want to worry about that when there were other things like the baby in her arms that was curiously looking at the bubble tea right now, “Maybe he is.” Beatrice whispered, “I…I just don’t like it.”
“I mean, no one does.” Evelyn adds, furrowing her brows, “Do you think he really believes you are making your whole relationship with Rooster?”
“Honestly I wouldn’t be surprised.” she mutters, “A lot of people seem to doubt that…ugh,I can’t think about it right now,I need to focus on Nikki and how we are going to do everything here without Roos. Jake and Bob said they’ll show up later this week and-”
“Oh! So will we then,right Ev? A big sleepover party!”
“No one said anything about sleeping over,Shells.”
“I know but wouldn’t it be fun?”
Evelyn flicks her eyes from Shells to Beatrice and Nicole, gesturing twice to the still awake baby in their friend’s arms. Shells finally remembers that the reasons for a sleepover, especially when there’s a one month old baby involved, shouldn’t even exist, “...oh.”
Evelyn sighs with annoyance before turning towards Beatrice “We’ll stop by, you won’t be alone.”
“I know.’ Beatrice grins, “And I appreciate you guys a lot because of it…it’s just,you know, it’s strange. She feels it too and…I don’t know,I don’t want to do a bad job.” Nicole’s light green eyes meet her mother’s and her tiny hand comes up to touch her mother’s lips. Beatrice couldn’t help but kiss the little palm and keep it close to her face, “I felt so bad seeing her cry.”
Evelyn parted her lips to speak, closed them, then opened them again, “Do you have something that Rooster used before he left?”
“Oh,uh, there’s one of his shirts.”
“You can hang it by Nikki’s crib when she’s asleep…it’s what my mother did to me with one of my dad’s shirts…It helped a little, at least until you can talk to him.”
Beatrice thinks about it but agrees, mentally glad to be done on the Eric subject and focusing on Rooster instead. As always, he was a much better thought than her ex ever was. “I’ll do that, thanks Ev.”
“You are welcome.” a pause, “Wait, did you just bring me over because you wanted to talk about how you dealt with Eric?”
Shells smiles, slurping what was left of her bubble tea, “Yeah! I thought it’d be fun!”
Which then evolved into a back and forth of questions and amused answers that Beatrice couldn’t really add in, choosing to sip her tea in peace while relaxing from what happened earlier. Even if Eric was brought in conversation and even if she worried why he was still so…latched onto her, thinking of Rooster helped a whole lot.
…God, she hopes these three months go by fast.
#bradley rooster bradshaw#rooster bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x oc#top gun maverick#bradley bradshaw x reader#bradley bradshaw x female reader#bradley bradshaw x named reader
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[Sunday, 11:24 AM] Congratulations, John!! Sherlock just told me the news. I am proud of you and sooooo happy! Love Violet
[Sunday, 11:31 AM] Thank you, I guess. What did Sherlock tell you? – John
[Sunday, 11:33 AM] Your engagement. The proposal sounded so romantic. I wish Siger had asked me like that.
[Sunday, 11:36 AM] Engagement? – John
[Sunday, 11:41 AM] Don't be shy, love. Sherlock told me everything.
[Sunday, 11:47 AM] I think you must have misunderstood something. I'm not engaged. I'm not even in a relationship currently. – John
[Sunday, 11:51 AM] There's really no need to hide it from us, John. Especially not under such happy circumstances. Siger and I fully support you. Besides, Sherlock already told us right at the beginning. Don't be angry with him, he said that you're not comfortable with being public about it, but he couldn't hold back. You know how he is.
[Sunday, 11:58 AM] I'm sorry if I sound confused, but I am. What did Sherlock tell you? And what am I not comfortable with? – John
[Sunday, 12:01 PM] Your relationship. With Sherlock.
[Sunday, 12:04 PM] Uhm, I think you might have mixed up something, but I'm not in a relationship with Sherlock. We've never been. – John
[Sunday, 12:06 PM] Are you sure?
[Sunday, 12:07 PM] Absolutely. – John
[Sunday, 12:11 PM] That's strange. Sherlock told us about your dates, the first kiss, all your anniversaries.
[Sunday, 12:13 PM] I'm afraid those never happened. I'm truly sorry, Violet. – John
[Sunday, 12:16 PM] Don't be, John. You're still like a son to us. I guess this explains why Sherlock asked us to not mention it to you. That silly boy. I'll talk to him when he and Singer come back home.
[Sunday, 12:21 PM] Don't be too angry with him. I'm sure he has a good explanation for all this. – John
[Sunday, 12:22 PM] No doubt. He always has one. Sometimes highly questionable, but it will make sense to him. I hope this won't damage your friendship. You're good to him. He seems happier since he met you.
[Sunday, 12:48 PM] John?
[Sunday, 01:14 PM] Sorry, I hurried to pack my bag. I'm on the train to you now. Should arrive in two hours. Will you pick me up at the station? – John
[Sunday, 01:15 PM] And don't worry. Everything will be fine, I promise you. – John
#johnlock fic prompts#free for adoption#incorrect sherlock quotes#johnlock#bbc sherlock#whispersfrom221b dialogues
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Welcome to the Choices Book Club! We are currently reading Blades of Light & Shadow II. The book releases a new chapter every Friday on the Choices App.
This Week’s Chapter: Chapter 13: Just the Two of Us
Question(s) of the Week:
How would you rate this chapter? [Vote Here]
Did you flirt with the monster?
Did you adopt the owlbear cub? [Vote Here]
If so, what did you name him?
Did you complete the "Warm Together" social quest with Valax? [Vote Here]
Which "favorite" did you ask Valax about? [Vote Here]
How are you feeling about Valax after this chapter? Have your thoughts or opinions changed?
Which LI had the best reunion? [Vote Here]
Did you acquire the new lore tablet? What information did you enjoy learning about most? Was there anything surprising? What are your thoughts on the completed Lore Tablet design?
How are you feeling about Shadow!Nia?
Any thoughts and theories about where Aerin is?
*Let me know if you can think of any other questions or polls I should add
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#choices book club#choices book club blades2#blades of light and shadow#blades of light & shadow#choices#playchoices#choices game#tyril starfury#mal volari#nia ellarious#imtura tal kaelen#bolas#choices blades#choices bolas#choices book club blades#choices blades 2#aerin valleros#Valax
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Is lucien a new character for underline the red? Did a quick glance through and couldn't find him tagged in anything. And what on earth did faber do to deserve that!
Lucien's been mentioned in Underline the Black a few times! ->
Gary took a seat in the opposite armchair, pulling his supervisor role around him like a protective cloak. He could lose himself in the knowledge of Caleb and Lucien’s relationship, and remember what they’d been focusing on last time, and where he was supposed to be guiding things, and slowly…calm came. Even though his heart raced from too much coffee – he could make the switch to wine in a few hours – and he had to stop himself from yawning.
‘So, Caleb. Tell me how you’re doing with Lucien this week? Were you able to make some progress regarding what we discussed last time?’
(Chapter 13)
At the lookout where Dr Gary and Efnisien had sat the first time, and Efnisien had seen the sea in person, he could see a couple of people sitting on the bench. A larger guy and a small omega with really long, curly black hair sat side by side.
‘That’s Caleb and Lucien,’ Dr Gary said, noticing where Efnisien was looking.
Efnisien nodded.
‘Lucien will be graduating soon. In a month or two, I expect.’
(Chapter 23)
‘Lucien is sounding much more stable and secure,' Gary mused, on the phone to Caleb during their supervisor session. 'I have no problems with you taking a longer break this time between omegas, after graduation.'
'As long as you're sure. I know we're at capacity...'
'We're not a factory. I want you to look after yourself, Caleb, and you've bonded a couple of times now, this can be the time when the grief gets harder.'
'Lucien's so excited to get back to his partner as well. It's super sweet, you know, and I'm glad we've managed to get some of his issues under control. I can sort of feel it, I'm going to need some time after Lucien, and a month or two doesn't seem like it'll be enough. I can always find some kind of place to stay off-site if you'd prefer...'
'No, no, Caleb, please. You offer the labour of bonding with someone you're eventually letting go of, we offer room to heal and recover from that as well. Kadek's returning soon, and Lucien won't be the only omega to graduate this year. It's the nature of the job, sometimes we have quite a few alphas available, sometimes we have none, and none of that is your responsibility to manage, but ours. I can tell you're feeling a bit flat about things, you're not nearly as arrogant as usual.'
(Chapter 42 - and another few times in this chapter)
'Ah,' Faber said, looking nervously between them. Gary felt some sympathy for the man, given his loyalty was primarily to Gary, and Temsen was his boss right now, and the air wasn't exactly thick with pheromones, but it didn't need to be to crush anyone who wasn't a peak alpha. What Temsen and Gary found easy to withstand was too much for most, and Gary knew his assistant was struggling. 'I- I- …Yes. Well. That's… I wanted to say that we've arranged a date for Denis Deschamps to meet with Lucien Beaumont and Caleb, Sirs. Sir.'
(Chapter 46)
'I heard Lucien's graduating?'
'You know, you really are a gossip, Anton,' Gary said. Anton burst into laughter on the other line.
(Chapter 48)
There's too many characters to tag for all the side characters in Underline the Black, but I'll likely add Lucien when he appears for the first time in Underline the Red, but otherwise he's definitely been mentioned, described, and discussed by several characters!
#asks and answers#underline the black#lucien beaumont#for a character with no speaking roles yet he's been mentioned a lot tbh because his storyline is important#to Underline the Red#and also to Faber#anyway yeah he's come up dslakfjasd
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Tl;dr of the unasked for Pat Parelli rant
-Pat Parelli is a con artist who beat his wife and scams people out of their money using extremely clever language
-Don’t even get me started on Parelli’s use of “horsenality” which assigns the stupid left-brain right-brain thing to horses. Along with introvert/extrovert but that’s semi-excusable. But, seriously… he’s advertising these horses as left-brain extroverts and right-brain introverts. Which, as I’ll touch on later, appeals to one market which makes the whole thing feel a bit suspicious.
-Liberty work IS an extremely valid way of working with horses, I partake in some level myself, but Parelli touts his methods as the only valid way while charging hundreds of dollars to “move up” levels in his program (where you aren’t even “allowed” to ride until level 3).
-Parelli’s website will sell you the same shit you can get at Tractor Supply or your local feed store for double the price, sometimes more.
-The most egregious item might be the Pat Parelli’s Rancher Roper, priced at $6,250. You can get a custom saddle fitted to your horse for less. My most high end saddle cost a staggering $600.
-Don’t have a horse? Don’t worry, Pat Parelli has your back! For the low low price of $5000-$150,000 (NOT a typo), you can get your very own Parelli trained horse! Purchases less than $25,000 even get levels 1-3 of the online program for free! Wow! Purchases above the price of a small down payment can claim 10 whole days of training with Pat Parelli himself! Just think, what else would you have spent that money on? I mean, a normal trainer costs about $3k/mo, what a deal Pat Parelli is giving you! For the cost of 8-50 months of training you get ten whole days with him and a horse!
-The most expensive horse at the moment, a 12 year old German Warmblood priced at $150k, only scores an 84/100 on the Parelli assessment… with a 6/10 on “Parelli Training.” It might just be me, but if I was buying a horse for more than some homes cost I would want that number to be a little higher in the training department than the 9.5/10 he got in “Look.” I’ve seen him sell an 11 year old gelding for $300k whose top characteristic was “very handsome.” Over half of this year’s highly bred Kentucky Derby horses cost less than that.
-For a quick horse price reference I have never paid $1k for a horse and my current budget is a bit over $5k. For $5k I had the opportunity to buy a dead broke papered quarter horse gelding under 10 years old. I would be hard pressed to pay $5k for a horse over maybe 13 years old unless it had like, insane breeding and/or training. Pat Parelli is selling a 16 year old mare for $15k.
-If you need more Pat Parelli in your life, you can join his campus program for 24-48 weeks for just $1000/week, where you’ll perform exciting horse training activities like building fences, a skill specifically mentioned in the application! Of course, you can only apply for this course after you’ve paid your hundreds to thousands for mere access to the online courses and additional materials and your $60 fee for each video application to move up a level! What a bargain!
-For his next in person event, you can lease a horse for the bargain price of $600/week on top of the $6500-10000 tuition for the two week program!
-Parelli’s program very clearly appeals to new, young, inexperienced horse owners. On the application to join his $1000/week program it’s asked how many hours you have spent riding a horse across your life. I’ve owned my own horse since I was 5 and started taking lessons at 4. My horse riding experience is old enough to join the US military. No way in hell would I be able to even BEGIN to calculate the amount of time I’ve spent riding. (I’m sure there’s something to say about the fact that this mostly appeals to women, and the former comments about how he treats his wife…)
-Pat Parelli’s cult feeds off of some weird form of elitism. Everyone who follows another method is wrong and abusive. Only members of Parelli’s program are good horse owners, and the more people you can convert to his methods (and website) the more good you do for horses. You’d never see a fan of Monty Roberts saying that.
-For context on training prices I’m taking an hour lesson with a trainer on my buddy’s horse to see if I mesh with the trainer for $70. Highest I’ve personally seen was under $200 a lesson and she’s a HUGE name in a specific breed. Dominates the show scene. Everyone knows her. Even the aforementioned Monty Roberts, one of THE big horse training names for DECADES only charges $300/hr for a 1-on-1 video call. Sending your horse off for training with 1-3 lessons a week usually runs $3k/mo.
-Pat Parelli isn’t fit to kiss my fucking ass.
#icy rambles#this was not. tl;dr.#but i could go on for hours#about the goddamn shitstorm that is pat parelli
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Cheating Surprise | C.E
THIS IS A REPOST FROM MY OLD ACCOUNT.
Warnings:Mentions of cheating. Mentions of sex. Angsty. Explicit language.Fluff.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Chris thinks reader is cheating on him.
Word Count: 1,287
Okay, I'll see you then. He's here somewhere so I'll just text you that info" you say lowly into the phone. You hang up the phone not knowing that Chris was eavesdropping on you in the other room. Chris had been noticing Y/N acting weird and very secretive the past few weeks and he was now thinking the absolute worse. Y/N leaves the room and he pretends to be looking for something when she passes by him. " Oh, hey baby, are you looking for something? "You ask as you see him looking on the floor for something. " I can't find a button I lost uh, on one of my favorite shirts but don't worry about it" He lies. Y/N found it odd that he would lose it in the dean since he barely ever steps foot in their other than for video interviews that he hadn’t had in a few months. " Okay...we’ll I'll be back for dinner, I got to go run some errands" you say giving him a peck on the lips but he doesn’t return it. " Again?" Chris scoffs. " Yeah…you know I've been trying to help out my sister with her small business. I'm mailing out some things for her and picking up some more boxes for her orders she’s swarmed with new orders ever since you posted about it on your social media" you say and Chris sighs. " Y/N... you and I always promised each other that in this relationship it was honesty over everything" Chris says. You look at him confused on where he's getting at. " What's going on Chris?" You ask getting worried. " I should be asking you the same thing... why have you been avoiding me for the past few weeks and sneaking phone calls in the other room when I’m around? Are you, are you cheating on me?" Chris asks and your heart drops. " W-what?!" You ask in disbelief. " You're never home, you’re sneaking around, you-you haven't even had sex with me in two weeks! Always saying you’re tired. If you're seeing someone else, please Y/N... tell me now" he says and you scoff. " How dare you think so low of me, you're my entire world Chris. I've flown thousands of miles away to see you for just 48 hours, I take care of your nieces and nephews like they're my own, I go to every award show with you even though i despise being in the spot light and you accuse me of cheating? You know what Chris... I can't even look at you right now" you say walking down the stairs. " Seriously, you can't even deny it can you?" Chris says following you. " Go to hell" you say before walking out the front door and going to your car. You immediately turn on the car and you flee out of your drive way. Once you stop at the first stop sign in the neighborhood you let out a sob. How dare Chris think you were cheating on him. You guys have been together now for three years and now that you were just trying to do something nice for him, he accuses you of cheating? A honk behind you startles you and you realize you’ve probably been sitting at this stop sign now crying for like five minutes. You look around to see if there were any cars coming and you drive off to a spot you hadn’t sat at since high school.
******************
Later that night
It was probably around 7pm now and Y/N still hadn’t returned home. Chris was worried sick. She wasn’t answering her phone so he called her sister who knew her best. “Y/S/N! It’s Chris, I have a bit of a dilemma here” he sighs. “She’s at the park we used to go too when we we were kids, you know you really fucked up this time Chris” Y/n’s sister says into the phone and Chris sighs. “You don’t understand... she’s never home! Or when she is her mind is somewhere else- Chris” she sighs. cutting him off. “She’s going to hate me for this but the reason my sister has been like that is because she’s been planning a surprise party for your 40th for over a month now, she’s been working overtime to afford everything plus running around planning everything, inviting all your family and friends, talking with caterers, DJs… the last thing my sister would do is hurt you in anyway now I got to go but you better fix this. Now or I'll take my pregnant ass over there and kick your ass myself” Y/S/N says before hanging up. At this point Chris was hating every inch of himself for ever jumping to the conclusion of Y/N cheating. Chris immediately grabs his keys and was out the door already knowing where to go.
When he got to the park, he saw her there sitting where the monkey bars were feet hanging off sipping a huge Slurpee. There was no one at the park, it was quite dark already so any parent that was here had left with their children hours prior. Y/N just sat there looking into nothing but she heard his footsteps approaching her. Y/N looks at him and goes back too sipping her Slurpee. “Can I join you?” Chris asks and you just shrug not caring what he did. Chris goes up the jungle gym and sits next to dangling his feet too next to you. “I really fucked up” he says and you snort. “I’m sorry for accusing you of the absolute worse, I had my insecurities get the best of me and I should have known better. I did find out what really is going on and I feel even shittier now… I appreciate you going to all these extremes for me” he says and you look over to him. “I just don’t get why you would think I would cheat on you when that was done to me by an ex… I’ve been there before and I would never put you through that sort of pain… I get I was being odd but I would never hurt you like that” you say to Chris, by this time you had tears running down your face. “I know that now, please forgive me Y/N. I want you to come home so we can sit on the couch and watch Rick and Morty with me and dodger” Chris says and you snort. "I'm still pissed at you; I've been stressing about giving you a perfect party and this wasn't the thanks I thought I would receive" you say to him. " I know, but I much rather you be pissed at me safely at home than too be here at night drinking a Slurpee" Chris says drying my tears with his thumbs. " C'mon, let's go home. I'll order you some take out and I can help with my party planning since the cat is out of the bag" Chris says getting up and jumping onto the monkey bars doing them with ease. " Aren't you a little too old to be doing all that' You laugh. " 40 is the new 20" he says letting go dropping only about a foot onto the ground. He comes over and helps me hop off the jungle gym. I don't think 20-year old's are playing on monkey bars either" you say walking to your car. " I'll follow you home" Chris says leaning down to kiss me. " I love you" he says pulling away. " I love you too, even though you can be an ass sometimes" You giggle and he smiles. " I know".
#chris evans fic#chris evans#chris evans x reader#chris evans fanfiction#chris evans x fluff#chris evans imagine
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“Kvindefodboldpodcasten” with Lars Søndergaard
I have translated some of the podcast here, mostly the part with Lars Søndergaard and who should play as a 9 in the future
04:33 - The hosts had made a top four with their best four Danish players in this international break, the players are Maja Bay Østergaard, Janni Thomsen, Josefine Hasbo and Sofie Svava and Lars says that he doesn't disagree, but also doesn't want to say who he thought did the best.
13:00 – They think that Maja was the best of the three goalkeepers in the squad this tournament, it was her debut, she was confident and had a good game against Norway.
Interview with Lars Søndergaard begins.
33:30 – Fun fact, they only had one training before the game against France as the first got canceled because the flight to France was delayed by 3,5 hours
35:25 – Lars says that the referee in the last game wasn’t so competent and then he adjusts it to a “less good referee” and then Amalie, the host, says that it was clear to see his blood pressure rose even though he was a “simple Northjutlander”, but he says he thinks that he was calm, compared to the rest of the team who sat on the bench 😂
38:00 - They have changed formation from 3-4-3 to 4-3-3
39:25 – Talks about Luna Gevitz and how she has been to two euros without having played a game (I have just checked her stats, she only had 20 caps for the A-team, where four of them are world-cup-qualification and 16 are friendlies)
42:30 – Talks about how Josefine Hasbo is doing really well and that the level in college football is high. She is dedicated to what she does and thrives well at Harvard with school and football.
48:00 – They mention Pernille for the first time and how to get goals from the attackers like Signe Bruun, Amalie Vangsgaard and Stine Larsen when Pernille isn’t playing.
He says that Bruun’s problem is, that she doesn’t get so much playing time, but is a really good box player and player with the head.
50:30 – Host asks, “Is Harder an alternative as a 9, if none of the other attackers in doesn’t get in form in their clubs before the world cup”, Lars’ answer “Yeah, luckily, we have Harder, she can play everywhere. I think Harder in a 4-3-3 is best at an 8 or 10, a little behind, and can send some good and decisive passes and help control the game from there. Then we have to wait and see where she should play. She showed against Spain, that if she had more support, especially in the first half and periods in the second, she was outstanding she is against tough teams and she is always finding space, so she could be an alternative in the 9 position even though we look more at some other at that position right now.
52:00 – He thinks it is the best time to end his trainer career after the world cup after 5,5 years. He has been through a lot with the team and thinks it is a good place to stop after a tournament, he would like to stop on the top, which he hopes he does. He doesn’t know what he should do afterward if it is something with football, or if he should just go on a “ski vacation” 😂 or do something totally different.
56:20 – What does it take to be a good coach for Denmark, “you have to be competent and have professionalism, also because the players are extremely focused on the details. It’s not a job where you just find a random training exercise. Women’s football is in big changes, and it takes a lot and takes collaboration and a whole team as coaches behind, not just the head coach.
59:25 – I really hope I can answer that the biggest achievement will be the last.
In the clip on Instagram he also says this, bit it isn’t in the podcast:
“In DBU we dream about getting far in this tournament. And that will put some demands on how we play, but our minimum goal is to get out of the group, we will be very disappointed if we don’t. I really hope that I can say that my biggest achievement will be my last.”
Then they also had a national team barometer to "take the temperature" and describe the teams form right now with emojis
Amalie uses this one to show that the teams level ir rising even though it had been low in the fall: 📈
Verner uses this one, also to show that it haven't been the best in the fall, but that we're now getting better: 🤒
#podcast#lars søndergaard#21.02.2023#pernille harder#wwc 2023#Spotify#kvindefodboldpodcasten Lars Søndergaard
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you know I know that to most people peter is the infinitely more relatable protagonist and when I read about him I also think "oh yea he's gonna be relatable to a lot of people, he probably says a lot of the stuff people want to say". But when I first read enders game at the ripe age of 9 I really liked the book and didn't realize why, I reread it as a 13 year old and realized the reason I liked it so much was because somehow, in some weird way, orson scott card managed to right my life experience to the uttermost minute detail, every single thought I made ender thought too, every single ender was asked we replied the same way, he did all the actions I would have done and he shared my emotion in all he felt and it was like reading a book made for you. Not even that but made OF you. Because for me I wasent relating to ender, I just was ender and ender was me but maybe a lot smarter, but we thought the same for most things regardless of how much quicker or deeper he analyzed, he had efficiency and I had persistence and we came to the same conclusion. It was magical, it was surreal. And the fact that people can't even relate to ender that much hurts me, because if I think of ender as me then it also means that in some way I also can not be related to.
But I will relate to you, somehow in someway I will try. I will try and understand you and the world and all of humanity and all alien foreign creatures to my perception. I will never be mad at you for I understand your actions, I will destroy you or manipulate you or maybe even kill you if I love you enough, I know you and I don't mind you not knowing me. Because you are infinitely better and kinder then I, so looking down at me trying to fathom you is useless effort.
I'm tired, I'm tired of playing games and lying and going to school to make a fake frown a bland comment and sassily insult each other and leave. I want to blankly stare at the silverware and talk about the moon, about wars, colors, kindness, cheese and sheep. I don't wanna say mean things and judge you or look concerned at your words just because that's the reaction you wanted from me. I'm sick of having to be what you're most comfortable with because if I'm too kind you hate my guts for it or love me for it but you'll never be friends with me for it. When ever I mention love and empathy you scoff or look awkward or laugh at it like it's some silly thing. I don't want to keep saying useless niceties or polite insults to bring down the tension of being stern but also being wide open for an embrace or tears or screams or a fight. Why must my love and sorrow be so all-consuming, it controls my life and I drag myself anywhere I can to feel more of it, more pain, more suffering perhaps, because I want to cry when other people laugh and I keep crying.
I need to sleep a good long while I'm running on 0 sleep except for a nap for the past 48 hours
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