#( it struck me as a pretty realistic line! )
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i'm gonna keep talking abt the 2012 vibes tho bc i want to and i think it might be a healing moment for us all, so feel free to contribute to this list!
first of all, the endless fics where the entire cast of ANY show/movie/universe were living under the same roof. like it didn't matter who it was, they all lived under the same roof and had breakfast together and saved the world while arguing over who ate the last of the chicken curry. it was a glorious era in which we gave no fucks at all about realistic content or logic, we just wanted the avengers and the cast of doctor who to somehow be living together in the avenger tower.
following this up with the delightful array of hc posts that can STILL be found where it's like, lists of the avengers' starbucks orders, or the cast of merlin's ideal breakfast, or how the characters in doctor who or supernatural or sherlock spend their days off, and they were so lovely to read bc it was simple and effective and displayed a perfect amount of understanding of the characters??
the shipping??? the SHIPPING. nobody gave two shites about what was reasonable nor canon, and the shipping landscape proved that. i remember reading this incredible fic of oneshots where maria and pepper got married and the next morning tony proposed to thor. it was SUBLIME and there was no angst, sb just wanted to write about thor and his designer cape and tony using the cape the next morning to wear while he made pancakes.
i wanna go back to the "living under the same roof" bc i remember reading SO MANY fics that described in exceptional detail the interiors and layouts of each of the individual floors (not rooms, FLOORS) of the tower that each of the avengers occupied, and they were always different but they always made sense, and lately i feel like there's this very incorrect belief that if something is different from another thing, one of those versions MUST be wrong, and like. no. i have five mugs that are very different but i love them each equally. idk when we started giving into this weird idea that "i know X says that tony likes black coffee, but i feel like he prefers macchiatos, and i worry that i might be wrong--" BESTIES IT'S FICTION WHY ARE WE DOING THIS TO OURSELVES
basically yeah that says it all
it's all fiction! like that's the point of it all, i feel like the reason it's so exhausting to watch movies from a franchise is because everyone immediately attacks it and says "oh it's terrible bc it doesn't follow THIS portrayal and lmao what a stupid line why did poe say "somehow palpatine returned" how stupid--" like, that isn't aimed at anyone here, but i see it in yt and insta and twitter and it's just like. it's so exhausting to LOVE a movie/series anymore, isn't it? since when did i start giving a feck about what some stranger in los angeles had to say about a movie that i actually really enjoyed?
i say that we should just start enjoying stuff again without the brutality of other opinions making us question our own tastes. i loved the eternals movie, so why does it matter what the straight white fanboys say? it doesn't! the eternals was an EXCELLENT movie! that wasn't what i wanted to end this post on but i feel it's important nevertheless.
#( out of souls. )#( okay to reblog. )#( idk if anyone wants to it's more me saying 'i don't mind if u do' )#( like damn i seriously felt BAD for enjoying movies and tv shows for a while )#( which sucks! )#( love what u love! it's okay! maybe the reason it's so exhausting in the rpc lately is bc we feel like we CAN'T love these things )#( but yk what? )#( i didn't see anything wrong with the line 'somehow palpatine returned'! )#( it struck me as a pretty realistic line! )#( how should poe or anyone else KNOW how the fecker came back?? )#( i'm getting off topic )#( time to nap )#( or caffeinate )
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do you have any ghostsoap favorite fics, perhaps?
boy do I....
I should preface this by saying that I'm pretty...particular with what types of fics I enjoy reading (I only like certain character interpretations/tropes/writing styles, etc) so bear with me...
These are all mostly canon-compliant, non-AUs, ones that I regard highly~
Seasons--by StinglessWasp: This is pretty much my go-to fic rec for anyone into CoD and ghostsoap in general. It showcases everything I love about these characters, in a setting that feels as authentic to the games as possible, while also exploring the depth and sincerity hidden under the surface. So well-written and paced--the dialogue and military references all contribute to that 'feels like a mission out of the game' experience. Plus, I just love this interpretation of our boys--the humor, the inner struggles, the intimacy--Wasp 100% *gets* these characters and it's a joy to read <3
Except You, You Can Stay--by Iravaid: While this one isn't *technically* ghostsoap until the last chapter, in my opinion, it's required reading for anyone who gives a shit about Simon Riley. This is *the* character study--an intimate dissection of Ghost's past that seems so realistic and grounded, you forget how ludicrous those comics really are. Ira takes such care in treating these heavy topics with delicacy and effectiveness. Each chapter has you going 'oh wow, this is even better than the last', but as a whole--it's a stunning, fleshed-out glimpse into Simon as the character he was always meant to be. And the final chapter which eases you into his relationship with Johnny is so authentic and sweet, it just makes perfect sense that they should be together, and that this poor poor man deserves some goddamn love <3
bleeding in the house of god--by revolvermonkcelot: This is a really great 'missing scene' fic, a perfect opportunity to explore the in-between moments that the game so carelessly chooses to gloss over. I can't praise Monk's writing enough--it's slick and crisp and very tasty; the imagery just jumps off the page and you can practically feel the sweat. Plus, the dialogue exchanges between our two boys are so well-timed and in-character--love all the slang and British references~ This whole fic reads like an addition to their mission flirting, and I'm all for it! You can truly tell this author has such deep understanding and experience with this franchise (winkwinkwink, this is a joke) Read it--it's good!
The Dead are all Living--by Kabbal: This fic blew me away when I first read it. It's such a unique take on the retirement trope, I just adore this interpretation of Simon as an aging recluse while he builds his home. I tend to lean towards more subtle, grounded characterizations of Mr Riley, and this really fits the bill. All of these glimpses and fragments into his post-military life contribute to an overarching love story; the scenes with Johnny are so poignant, it's like you're pining alongside them both. I love how not-perfect they are; flawed and difficult and real. There are some moments and lines that just....struck something in me so deeply. I'm sure I'll still be thinking about it for a long long time <3
Portrait of Taction--by a_platypus: Another Simon-centric fic that I absolutely love. The character voice in this is off the charts, I can hear him so vividly in all of his inner dialogue and stunted attempts at conversation. Simon is so endearingly dense in this fic, you're just waiting for him to finally get his act together, but the clumsy, oblivious steps he takes in his relationship with Soap are truly a treat to read. I love this version of Johnny too--confident and considerate, but still hopelessly crushing on his superior. It's comedic, well-written, and the paragraphs describing Soap's journal give some of the best insights into his character I've seen <3
come on, haunt me--by flyby2: This was a really good long fic that I took my time savoring. What could have been a typical 'on leave' fic instead took time to develop a unique spin on the backstories as well as throwing our boys into some wholesome encounters. Both Soap and Ghost felt very true to character, and I appreciate the exploration of PTSD and the subsequent struggles that come along with...all that. There was a really nice balance in having their romance spread across the chapters, and I can promise a very sweet, happy conclusion <3
in the mess of it all--by flowersferns: A lovely one-shot that exhibits some of my favorite aspects of these two characters. I'm a sucker for 'one of them is hurt, the other is freaking out, they are both idiots in love, etc'. There are some really great dialogue and character moments in this, plus the overall prose hits hard. Love this take on their romance--the mutual trust, the familiarity of their bond. And just the general theme of impermanence--the inevitability of what this relationship means for them--two soldiers, willing and ready to sacrifice their lives at a moment's notice, still clinging to each other because...god...that's all they have---big fan of this :'D <3
Lapsus--by Lisbetadair: Another really great one-shot and 'missing scene' fic. The authenticity in the writing is spot-on--it's like you can feel Soap's pain right off the bat. I love how smoothly the banter flows between the two, and the attention to detail and references all help lend to that 'hardened military man' exterior. Ghost smelling like flowers because of a face wipe is such a delightful addition, plus the scene where Soap is, ah, donald-ducking it in just a t-shirt with his jewels out is such a funny mental image, I still think of it fondly from time to time. It's funny, it's surprisingly cute, it's very in-character. Stick around for some awkward but adorable cuddles <3
I'm sure I have more to recommend, but these are the ones I can personally endorse for now~
#asks#fic rec#I've never actually done a fic rec list like this before...#a small glimpse into my nightly routine of browsing the ao3 trenches for something remotely readable 🫡#funny how most of these are Ghost centric...#I'm *very* particular on how I prefer Soap to be portrayed and wooo boy...is it a struggle 😔
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gotta put my thoughts down before i forget it but the thing that did it in for me is how spy x family is ultimately and uniquely a “children-focused” work, where the major stakes require that we pay attention to the lives and dynamics of young children so that — specifically — we have to genuinely engage with and invested in their inner lives, motivations, desires, thoughts, emotions, etc.
i think this is a very unique focus in the shounen sphere, where the audience and creators are centered about adolescent boys (the shounen genre, in its name) and thus have a very wide scope of focus that nonetheless has “aged” past “childhood”. usually media about children and childhood are sequestered in its own genre (children’s shows like doraemon, magical girl anime like precure series, etc.) aimed at a different target audience who are in the same demographic as the main characters in the shows. this is, obviously, not a bad thing. but i appreciate the “genre-breaking” focus that spy x family have because it inspires a sort of empathy to children, who are often not the most favorite group of people for the typical demographic of shounen readers, that is specifically vital in today’s climate. (can’t say much about japan itself, who historically has been dealing with declining birth rates, but oh i can speak for the american individualism— ironically where sxf is also very popular in) another thing about this is it’s drive home how intertwined the family life is, and should be. agent twilight and thorn princess’s plot-lines are clearly shounen-esque (a spy fighting for world peace, an assassin weeding out traitors) but they are nonetheless inextricable from the family- and anya-focused story, because by choice or circumstances they are anya’s parents. they’re a part of a larger societal fabric that embedded them in relationships to others — children being one of them. i think that’s pretty neat.
another thing, specially about the depiction of children in sxf: they are fictitious yet realistic enough to portray real children and inspire sympathy for them. a lot of asian home media in general have the problems of portraying young children as “problems”: annoying, loud, privileged, dumb, ungrateful, etc etc. these are such complaints about children that are unfortunately way too common and way too ungenerous and mean-spirited; none of these tropes are present, even in a media full of scions and heiress. complaints about them being brats (red circus bus hijacking arc) was rightfully framed as unsympathetic and unreasonable (they’re children! they can’t help where they were born into— it goes both ways.) i think the crux of this beautiful balance sxf struck in portraying nuanced, dynamics children is sympathy. they can be loud, they can be whiny, cry at the drop of a hat, has too much energy, gross, have bad grades, clingy, inconsistent, academically unmotivated, ran off randomly— and that’s fine, because we know why they do it, we are given space into their inner thoughts, something so rarely afforded to real life children at times. but they can be motivated, they want world peace, they want to have genuine friends, they want their friends to be happy, they have crushes, and most of all they love their parents and they love the people around them.
i think regardless of everything sxf is a work that understands that children are full of love and the majority of the things they do are out of love. i think that alone makes it incredible in the current socio-econo-political climate where sympathy is spared so little and humanity spreads so thin children barely gets what they deserve. i suppose that’s the sort of war we are entrenched in.
#spy x family#spy x family meta#i guess?#it’s late and i have been rereading spy x family obsessively to cope and i just#have a lot of feelings about it#anya forger#damian desmond#becky blackbell#damian’s friends too but i don’t know their full names. sorry kids.#all of these children are so precious and i would die and kill for them and would live to build world peace for them. if you catch my drift
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Banana Spa
pairing: nicholas ruffilo x fem!reader
masterlist: here | crossposted: ao3 | word count: 9.6k
summary: you decide to treat your boyfriend to an at home spa day before he leaves for tour again :)
warnings/themes: established relationship, sugary sweet fluff ???¿ who am i??¿, briefly sad??, light sub/dom dynamics, soft dom nick, sub reader, massage, praise kink?, pet names sorry not sorry, bathtub sex, use of a shower head, v fingering, overstimulation, multiple orgasms, orgasm delay, pnv (unprotected), riding, semi-realistic? aftercare, caregiver nick, MUSHY SORRY, again nick has a big fat one, don’t think too hard about the logistics ok, 18+ MDNI
a/n; this originally began as a nice short fluffy piece but... alas, the sad and horny demons took hostage 😅 it's just who i am okay 😭 only sad for a bit though! kinda
a/n: don't like it don't read it. don’t be mean for no reason & let others enjoy things thnx :)
You stamped a knee at each side of Nick’s sides, settling yourself in his lap. His hands instinctively found your hips to have something to anchor to.
“Alright babe you gotta cooperate with me, okay?” You giggled, taking his cheeks in your hands.
He blinked up at you with his aqua eyes gleaming, so enamored with you to even care what you were doing in his lap, simply happy that you were there.
You began brushing hair out of his face and gathering it into a low, untethered bun to expose the entirety of his features. He was beautiful, nothing new to you of course, but at times like then, you couldn’t help but be awe-struck of him. He was yours and you were his.
You reached over to the table beside you to pick up some toner and soaking a cotton round with the liquid. You took it to his face, starting at his cheekbones. He hissed at the coldness of it against his warm skin.
“This smells so… chemically, are you sure it’s safe?” He asked as a half-joke and with a slightly nervous chuckle.
“Very sure my love.” A reassuring grin tugging at the corners of your mouth. “You think I would put harmful chemicals on your pretty face?” You swiped the cotton round down his nose and used it to boop the tip.
A barely visible peach coated his cheeks, if you hadn’t been so close to him, you would’ve missed it.
“I don’t know, maybe you wanna scorch my face off so the fans stop liking me.” A playful smirk draped over lips.
You rolled your eyes and squeezed his cheeks between your fingers, tilting his face upwards to meet your gaze. “Oh honey,” You cooed playfully. “The fans would simp over you even if your nose fell off.”
A true laugh rumbled through his chest and tumbled out of his lips. “Yeah, whatever.” He brushed off the statement as if you just told him the sky was green. “What’s next?” He inquired genuinely, letting his eyes drop back to your arsenal on the table.
“Hmm…” You peered over behind you and tapped your fingertips on your chin. “Oh! Yes, I forgot I got this for you!”
Your fingers plucked a small yellow glass vile. You twisted the lid and squeezed the rubber part between two fingers then released it to let the pipette fill completely.
“Let me know if this smell reminds you of anything.” You slowly and carefully slid the tip of the glass pipette across his cheek, disposing serum along the way.
His nostrils flared and restricted in short consecutive spurts trying to let the aroma fill his nose entirely. His brows knitted for just a second as he processed the smell before his eyes grew sparkly and excited. “Banana?” He asked with hesitancy still lining his words, regardless of the indistinguishable scent.
You giggled and love filled your entire chest at his adorable reaction. “I knew you’d love it.” You sighed happily and utterly love drunk.
“Hm, I love you.” He countered, admiring the pointed, concentrated face you wore as you focused on rubbing in the product. “That stuff’s made from bananas?”
“I love you too baby.” You smiled and leaned down to gently grab his face again, this time to bring your lips to his. A smile curled onto his lips against yours, sweetening the kiss. You couldn’t help but mirror the grin and savor the adoration. “Hm, I think banana enzymes or something? I don’t really know.”
You straightened back up in his lap again, using your curled index finger to tilt his chin up and swivel his face from one side to the other analyzing his skin.
“Admiring your work?” He laughed, feeling a little silly and a little insecure from being studied so closely.
“Just trying to see if you have any spots that need a little extra attention.” You hummed. “But surprise, surprise the man that only uses face wash has perfect skin.”
His chest puffed out a little involuntarily, as if you just invigorated him with newfound confidence after being so foolishly insecure. “Well, would you look at that.” He smirked.
“Yeah, yeah.” You waved him off jokingly before reaching to pick up a thin packet from the table. “Still gonna make you do a face mask though.”
He groaned, “No, no not the clay stuff again.” He winced at the memory of the chalky mud you had once put on him that somehow ended up all over his hair…and eyebrows, and ears, and fingernails, and ʘ necklace, and his favorite Paul Rudd Fanclub shirt.
The Great Face Mask Incident of 2023™️
You couldn’t help but laugh at the same memory. “No, no. I would never put you through that again.”
Nick let out a relieved sigh as if he had just gone through some war flashbacks. “Thank god.”
“No, I think you’ll quite like this one.” You pressed your lips together to not give away just excited you were to show him the mask you had in store for him.
You carefully pulled the folded sheet mask from the packet, letting any excess drip back into the pouch before setting it to the side. You then began delicately unfolding the thin fabric of the mask. Nick’s brows knitted together, and his head cocked to the side slightly like a confused puppy as he tried to gather what sort of potential torture device you were preparing for him. Finally, you unveiled the round sheet with the likeness of a cartoon tuxedo cat.
His silver eyes lit up the second he realized. “It’s Jerry!” It melted your heart at just how wide his smile got, all toothy and reaching his eyes.
You giggled and nodded, “It sure looks a lot like him, doesn’t it?”
Once you were able to keep him from wiggling around, you put the mask on, tugging it here and there to get it taut and symmetrical.
“There, now you look just like your son!” You chuckled behind your hand, looking at how adorably ridiculous your boyfriend looked.
He smirked as much as could beneath the mask, “Yeah where do you think he got his good looks from?”
You rolled your eyes and gently smacked his arm but there was no malice behind either action, “At least Jerry has humility.”
He gazed up at you with a small, sweet smile painted on his lips and love coating the soft curves of his features. “Yeah, that he got from you.” He said casually, like it rolled off his tongue without even thinking twice about it.
Your heart swelled so big in your chest that it was threatening to breach your ribcage. Nicholas had Jerry long before you entered the picture but since getting together a little over a year ago, Jerry had become your biggest fan. Since day 1 he followed you around everywhere and if you were resting on any surface, he was there to claim you as his temporary bed. In your time together Nick had never once even joked about you being Jerry’s other fur-parent. It was a small frivolous thing, but you knew the weight it held. You didn’t know if he had just said it without realizing or if he truly meant it, but in your heart, you were choosing to believe the latter. Either way you opted out of making a big deal about it.
“Oh! I almost forgot!” You gasped at your own brain urgently reminding you of a crucial step. You nearly leapt off him and bolted to the kitchen. Within seconds the project at hand was executed and ready for placement.
You scurried back over to him, this time standing behind his seat on the couch. “Alright, close your eyes and tilt your head back.”
“You got it boss.” He teased and did as you asked. It made you wonder just how much he’d cooperate with taking other orders – but that was a daydream for a much different day. “Cucumbers?”
“Somethin’ like that.” You held back a giggle and placed two banana slices over each closed eyelid. “Okay, all done!”
His nose scrunched up towards the objects on his eyes, “Bananas?!”
You finally let out the laugh you’d been holding back and placed a kiss atop his head. “Now you got all your favorite stuff, cats and bananas!” You circled around his seat and climbed into his lap again.
“And you.” He smiled softly while his callused hands instinctively found your hips again.
Your cheeks heated up and your stomach filled with butterflies. No matter how silly he looked, he could always get you to melt in his hands. “Oh, shut up.”
“Remind me why we’re doing this again?” He asked.
Your grin faltered a bit at his question, and you paused to think about your answer. You let your hand fall gently just below his neck, sliding down slowly while your fingers softly laced beneath the silver chain of his necklace. You let the thorny pendant rest on your fingers as you admired it. As much as you hated the calm before the storm and selfishly despised the reason for it, you knew it’s what you signed up for and what brought him the most joy. Your thumb ran over the thorny crown, grateful for the amount of time you’d been able to spend with him during this break. This was maybe your 3rd or 4th run at him leaving for tour and while you could tell that it was getting easier, it was extremely slow progress. It seemed as though each time felt like the first time all over again. Your eyes fluttered closed in a feeble attempt to tame the burning in your eyes and the tears threatening to appear. You took a deep breath and swallowed the lump in your throat knowing that letting him see you like that would not only ruin the moment but make him feel guiltier than he already did, which was exactly the opposite of what the activity meant to accomplish.
“Baby?” He pressed after you’d gone silent for a bit.
You cleared your throat and blinked the tears away, forcing a smile onto your face so that it could be heard in your words. “Sorry love,” You wrapped your hand around the pendant just hard enough that the thorns stabbed into your palm, perhaps hoping that the pain could force the ache away, or maybe in hopes that if you stamped yourself hard enough with him, he could always stay with you. “Just got distracted. What did you ask?”
“I asked why we’re doing this? I feel really silly right now.” He laughed, though a little less bright than before. You hoped that he hadn’t picked up on your energy shift.
“Oh, um,” You looked down and released the hold on his necklace, letting your palms rest on his chest. “Just wanted to pamper you a little, before you have to go work so hard.” You tried your best to keep your voice light, but the sadness in your voice was unmistakable, at least to Nicholas.
His smile fell into a small frown, and it made you wish you had just lied, but you were never much of a good liar, especially not to him. He reached up pulling the banana slices off his eyes and placing them on a paper towel on the table. Somehow, he looked even goofier with the bananas off his eyes.
You suddenly felt flushed under his gaze – regardless of the cat mask still adorning his face. It was unclear whether it was the normal affect he had on you that was making you blush, or rather the vulnerability he’d caught you in.
“Baby,” He let out a sad sigh, “Is that what this is about?” His hands moved up to envelope your hips again, rubbing small comforting circles into the flesh beneath your shirt.
You shook your head vehemently, “No, no, I’m just tryin’ to spoil you honey, you deserve it.” You tried for a smile but couldn’t quite reach.
It was clear in his eyes that he wasn’t buying it. “Oh, let me get this cursed thing off of me.” He said, his hands already going to peel up the edges of the sheet mask but failing miserably.
A grin did pull at your lips watching him struggle and decided to take over. “Here, let me do it.” You laughed, gently swatting his hands away and pulling it off yourself and setting it on the table next to the forgotten bananas. “For someone who’s so good with his fingers, that sure was hard for you, huh?” You teased, attempting to deflect from the seriousness you’d just caused. All you wanted to do was go back to the soft, happy bubble you’d created before.
His inked hand trailed up your body to cup your cheek. “I’m gonna miss you so much, you know that right?”
You rolled your eyes trying your best to hold up your strong exterior, “Yeah, yeah, whatever, we don’t have to do this. We don’t have to talk about it, okay?” It took every bit of energy you had to yank each edge of your lips into a smile.
“Hey, don’t do that.” He frowned. “Maybe I wanna talk about it?”
“But you dooon’t though.” You whined, pressing on his chest slightly. “We were having a good time and I ruined it.” You whispered. Your eyes fluttered down to where your hands met his abdomen, faintly crinkling his faded Slipknot shirt between your fingers.
“Hey.” His hand found your chin and tilted it back up to face him once more. “I’ll be back before you know it.” He reassured the obvious.
“I know.” You mumbled and found your eyes dropping once again, not bearing the strength to look at him for too long. “I know what I signed up for. I know that it’s part of loving you.” Your hand rediscovered his necklace, flipping it between your fingers for comfort.
“Just because it’s part of the deal, doesn’t mean it’s not hard, y/n.” His voice was more firm that time, trying to cement the severity of his words.
“I know.” You groaned, frustrated that he wouldn’t just drop it.
He sighed, “I’m just saying it’s okay to be upset about it. And it’s okay to talk to me about it.” His thumb grazed over your cheekbone, enticing you to look at him. “We’re a team, remember?”
You released a long exhale finally relaxing a bit under his touch. “I know, Nicky, I know. I just didn’t want you to feel guilty and,” Your hand went up to wrap around his wrist and your eyes darted somewhere far away from him. “I didn’t want you to think that I can’t handle it.” Before he could respond your fingers gripped his wrist harder and the burning in your eyes returned. “I can handle it, I can.”
The crack in your voice didn’t go unnoticed by the male and all he wanted to do was scoop you up in his arms, but he knew better than to smother you when you were that emotional. “I know you can baby.” He said gently, using his thumb to wipe away a tear that was on the verge of escape. “I never questioned that. And if I ever do, then we’ll work through it,” He gently tapped the side of his thumb on your cheek to bring your attention back to him. “Together. Okay?”
You nodded against his palm, nuzzling into his touch. “Together.”
“That’s my girl.” He smiled and pulled you down into a sweet kiss.
You pressed your forehead against his gazing into his eyes, tonight they were particularly grey. “You’re too good to me.” You said so quietly that if he wasn’t nose-to-nose to you, he wouldn’t have heard it.
He shook his head as much as he could without disturbing the moment, “No, I’m not good enough.”
“That’s not tr-“ You began but were quickly interrupted by his lips on yours again.
“Ah, ah.” He hummed once he pulled away, “I won’t be taking any back talk.”
Your cheeks burned bright cherry red that time, no amount of makeup could conceal it. Even though his words were light, you knew he wasn’t joking. Nicholas was an expert at imbedding dominance in featherlight touches and sweet nothings.
“Yes sir.” You replied instinctively.
The energy spiraled between you two had shifted from silly to emotional, to something entirely different now. His hands trailed up your sides beneath your shirt to rest both on your lower back.
“C’mon, you took such good care of me, now it’s your turn.” Without giving you any warning he scooped you up. You squeaked at the sudden action but instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist and your arms around his neck.
“Where are you taking meeee.”
“Well, we’re having a spa day, aren’t we? What’s a spa day without a bubble bath?”
You melted into him, loving the idea of a warm bath accompanied by him.
Nick began drawing the bath making sure to add all your favorite additives as you stood patiently waiting instruction. Once he was satisfied with the way the tub was filling, he sat on the edge and beckoned you over. “Come here angel.”
Your cheeks flushed with warmth at the name, taking a couple steps to stand between his legs. He began tenderly undressing you until you were completely bare in front of him.
He wasn’t shy with the way his eyes wandered down your body. “God you’re beautiful.” His words riding an infatuated exhale.
The strawberry pink already present on your cheeks only worsened. “Shush.” You wave off his compliment and used your arm to cover your chest.
He stood and took your chin between his index and thumb tilting your gaze up at him. “I won’t ever stop reminding you of how stunning you are.”
You shook your head out of his grasp. “Shut up Nicholas.” You said shyly.
He took your cheek in his grasp instead this time, getting more control of you. “What’s wrong baby? Am I getting you all flustered?”
You were sure your face was beet red now. “C’mon Nicky, stop messin’ around, the bath is getting cold.”
A satisfied smirk tugged one edge of his lips, finding amusement and pride in your blatant embarrassment. “As you wish princess.” He began to undress himself until he was matching your nude attire.
Your eyes did the same as his did earlier and raked down his body, lean and inked on almost every bit of him. You’d been with him for over a year and you still managed to find new tattoos on him that you’d never seen before. His body was a spectacular and endlessly interesting museum only you had the key to.
He didn’t wait for you and stepped over the porcelain into the large oval tub, letting his body sink down into the steaming water. Almost instantly your exquisite museum was engulfed in mountains of bubbles. “Well, you comin’? You were the one complaining about water ‘getting cold’.” He teased.
You rolled your eyes and cautiously dipped your toe into the water. You hissed and recoiled at the scalding temperature. “Fuck that’s hot.”
Nicholas chuckled at your reaction, “Still think it’s getting cold?”
“Shut up.” You mutter.
“Just take it slow baby, let your body get acclimated to the water.” He sounded patient but his eyes didn’t match – the longer you were under his gaze, the more you felt like an animal of prey being stalked.
After a bit of time getting your lower body get used to the water you were finally able to sink down between his legs and rest your back against his chest. A small sigh of relief left your lips at the feeling of soothing comfort with him. No matter the problem or hindrance, Nick always made everything okay. He made you feel safe and taken care of in a way you’d never felt before. Getting that feeling from a rockstar who’s constantly touring wasn’t something you ever imagined possible, but somehow, it was with him. It took a while for him to earn your trust, especially at the very beginning, the first time he toured just a month or two after making things official. But he made sure to prove his faithfulness in a multitude of ways – from sharing his location to sending pictures and videos frequently to even sending you flowers or other small gifts to let you know he was thinking of you. Life with Nicholas wasn’t perfect, but it was a dream.
His fingers first found your shoulders, digging his thumbs into the wound-up tense muscles at the base of your neck.
“Mmm.” You hummed at the sensation and leaned further back against him. “That feels so good baby.”
“Yeah?” He asked, kissing the side of your head.
“Mhm.” Your eyes fluttered shut as you sank a little further into the water.
He spent some time working through the knots in your neck and shoulders. Wherever he pressed his fingertips felt like he was releasing a world of tension.
“That’s it, just relax.” His hands drifted down past your shoulders and onto your sides, using his thumb to rub circles into the muscles of your back - as best he could in your position anyway.
As his hands trailed lower you felt a flutter fill your tummy and settle in your core. You didn’t even realize you were squirming until his hands found and gripped your hips hard. “Stay still.” He ordered quietly just below your ear.
A shiver ran through you at his gravelly voice stealing the air in your throat. You did as he said, as much as you could, and hoped it’d be good enough for him. His fingertips lowered, beginning to run up and down the curves of your hip bones. The close proximity of his fingers to your core was starting to make you dizzy. You sucked in a harsh breath when his hands traveled further down to massage your thighs. His fingers were diligent and determined with their placement and tempo, using his thumb to rub tight circles into the flesh of your upper inner thigh. There’s no way he couldn’t feel you nearly vibrating under his touch, and you had to restrain yourself from grabbing his hand to put him where you needed him the most.
You felt his lips curl into a sinister smile against your neck. “What’s wrong princess?” He asked condescendingly. “Am I not helping you relax?”
“No, no. You are.” You almost stutter out, trying to sound as confident as possible.
“Hm.” He hummed, gliding his fingers up the inner side of your thigh. “I wonder… what you do when you get all wound up like this when I’m away?” There was an edge to his question that erased any indication of genuine curiosity.
Your eyes widened at the question and your mind went fuzzy blank. “Well…I…um.” Was all you could get out, pathetically.
“Oh, c’mon baby.” He lowered himself to just below your ear. “Use your words for me. Tell me what you do.”
Your heart felt like it was colliding against your ribcage incessantly while simultaneously pooling your rampant pulse in your clit. “I-I,” You took a breath in a feeble attempt to steady your breathing. “I touch myself.” You blurted out, knowing it was both the truth and what he wanted to hear.
You didn’t need to look at him to know how wide and proud his smirk was.
“Good girl.” He hummed. “Why don’t you show me where you do that?”
Your eyes widened once again, this time swallowing all the saliva available in your mouth. Hesitantly, you reached out beneath the water and took hold of his wrist, bringing it between your legs. “Here.”
He used his hand to slowly cover and cup your core before carefully running his fingers through you. You wanted to whine at the small sensation but knew how pathetic you’d sound. “Thank you for showing me baby.” He acknowledged your obedience. “But I want you to show me exactly what you do.”
You’d show him anything at that point to keep his fingers on you, so you nodded and covered his hand with your own. You guided him to your clit that was buzzing and begging for his attention. Your middle and ring fingers pressed into his and prompted them to start moving in circular motions.
“Mmm.” He pressed a kiss to your neck before nipping at the skin like a predator taste-tasting his meal. “That feels good doesn’t it?”
Your head lulled itself on his shoulder, already getting lost in the pleasure blooming at his fingertips. “Mhm.” You mumbled with drooping eyelids.
He took control of the movements almost instantly, starting a display of one of his many talents. He let you savor his actions for a bit, knowing that the further gone you were, the more pliable you’d be in his hands. “Is this all you do baby? Or is there somewhere else you touch?” He asked already knowing the answer, just wanting you to say it.
His plan worked, as it always did, and you were nothing but an obedient ragdoll for him now. Every cell in your body wanted to bend to him – he had magic in his touch, you were completely certain of it.
Without any verbal response you just guided his working hand down to your entrance. That’s all the convincing he needed and carefully slipped two fingers into you. He let out a small, low groan the feeling of how tight you were around his fingers. You could feel his already hardening cock throb against your lower back. The sensation of his member against your skin while he was using his fingers to fuck you was bittersweet because now all you wanted was his cock filling you up instead.
“God you’re so fucking tight.” He nearly growled against your throat. “I’m gonna miss burying myself in your pretty cunt.”
You felt like you could disintegrate into thin air from how good you felt – yeah, his fingers working magic was one thing, but his words melted you completely. Being complimented and wanted, no – needed – by him was a high that no orgasm could ever touch.
“I need your cock, Nicky please.” You whined without caring how desperate you sounded. “Please, I need you.”
“Oh bunny, you know better than to rush me.” He tsked before moving to do something you didn’t expect. He kept his one hand fucking his fingers in and out of you rhythmically while curling in ever so slightly but brought the other back down on your throbbing clit.
A gasp left your mouth as he effortlessly used both hands to fuck you in the most delicious way. You had already been close just from his fingers curling right into your sensitive spot but now with his fingers rolling against your nub you were seconds from oblivion.
“Fuck.” You spat out urgently. “Fuck, fuck, I’m close – s-so fucking close.” You whimpered out, squeezing your eyes closed trying to keep from coming undone before you were allowed. “Fuck baby, please let me cum. Please can I cum?”
All he did was hum an “mhm” against your neck before you were seeing stars. Tingles seared across your body and your walls pulsed around his fingers.
“That’s it, cum all over my fingers like the good girl you are.”
The praise only intensified the orgasm, causing your back to arch from him. Your face lulled into the crevice of his neck letting him vividly hear all the noises you were making for him. Nick loved your noises as much as you loved his words – he made a mental note to record you next time so he could have something on the road. He could get off on the sound of you alone.
He gently pulled his fingers from you and slowly tapered his action on your clit, but not completely. He retained an agonizingly slow pace on your now overly sensitive nub. He kept the pace slow enough so it wouldn’t be uncomfortable for long until you started to feel good again.
You felt him reaching beside you for something but were too fucked out to pay attention. “Tell me baby, have you ever used this to help relax?” His voice was buttery smooth like blue suede.
Your brows furrowed above your closed eyelids, wondering what he was referencing. When you blinked your eyes open, they rounded to see him holding the detachable showerhead and was suddenly grateful for the extra-long cord you’d opted for. You shook your head and answered honestly. “No.” You’d always been curious but never actually tried.
Nicholas was an expert at knowing when you were lying so he believed you. “Here.” He tenderly scooped up your hand, cupping it in his own like a spoon. With a flick of his other thumb on the showerhead, a crazed stream of patterned water jutted from it. He brought it to the hand he was holding and let the stream hit your palm. “Is that too strong?” He questioned genuinely wanting to know your comfort level.
As much as the strength of the water inspired some more flurries in your core, you nodded shyly. “Too strong.” It was typical for your responses to become minimal once you entered any level of subspace. Having that amount of trust to even fall into that headspace was a luxury you only ever found with Nick. Trusting him was easier than you’d like to admit, it came as naturally as breathing air into your lungs.
“Okay.” His thumb spun the filter onto another setting. “How about this one?” He questioned even though he figured it would be a no since it was thin streams of water lining an empty tunnel.
That one made you giggle and shake your head since it obviously wouldn’t provide much pressure. Nick smiled at your adorable giggle, filling his chest with so much warmth and love, he had no idea what to do with it all. He pressed a kiss to your head before flipping to another setting.
A perfectly tempered stream danced in your palm – not too strong, not too weak, and the jet pattern was an enticing rhythm. You bit down on your bottom lip and nodded. “Good.”
Nick’s free hand found your tummy, pressing it flat against your stomach and slid down painfully slow between your legs. Your breath caught in your throat at the anticipation of his touch. He tenderly spread your legs further apart before using his fingers to spread your lips apart, baring you open so that the jet stream of water could land precisely where it was needed.
“Now sweetheart,” He began. “You were so good for me. You did as I asked, you used your words, you asked for permission.” He lowered the shower head into the water, and you felt the jet stream hit your thigh. It was stronger than you expected and suddenly both fear and excitement pooled in your core. “I want you to know that this is a reward. This is what good girls get. Do you understand?”
Your cheeks grew warm, and your breath hitched in your throat at his words. Before you had time to properly prepare, the strong pressure of the stream pummeled into your sensitive nub. You let out a loud squeak as intense pleasure coarsed your body and down your limbs.
“Baby. I asked you a question. Do you understand that I’m allowing you to feel this good? That this is a privilege?”
Your hands gripped his thighs at each side of you and nodded your head enthusiastically, “Yes sir, I do.” You barely got your words out past your heavy breathing.
He smiled against your neck, “That’s my girl. My best girl. Now what do you say?”
Your heart flooded with lovey pride and your brain filled with nothing but him. He encompassed your very being, every cell of your composition belonged to him. “Thank you.” Your head fell back on his shoulder as he brought the shower head closer to your cunt, only intensifying the pressure. “Thank you, thank you.” You repeated like a prayer.
“God, I can’t wait to fill that pretty pussy up with my cock.” The end of his words resembled something like a growl.
His evident need for you went straight to your stomach, helping to weave a knot that was ready to snap. You were surprised you’d lasted this long since this was easily one of the best feeling you’d ever felt. Knowing that something as convenient as a shower head held so much power was dangerous, especially now that you associated it directly with him.
The jet propulsion on your clit was deliciously brutal, each wave hitting you harder than the last as your sensitivity increased. Your legs began to tremble from the sheer amount of pleasure building up in your body begging for release. “Nicky.” You heaved out while your fingers dug into his thighs. “I can’t hold it, please.” Your request drenched in utter desperation. “Please let me cum, I need to cum baby please.”
Nicholas hummed at the request, mulling it over in his head. If this were any other day, under any other circumstances, he’d string out your orgasm as far as he wanted, but it was a day of relaxation after all.
“Go ahead,” He whispered, bringing the shower head just a tiny bit closer to nudge you over the edge. “Cum for me, will you? And don’t fight it okay? I wanna hear you.”
And with that, another orgasm blinded you, this one ripping through you more violently than the last. Your entire body was in sparking, euphoric bliss. Curses, screams and moans poured from your throat, all laced with his name.
“Oh, that’s it princess, let it all out for me.”
And you did just that. He kept the stream on your bud through your high and somewhere between his grainy voice talking you through and your overstimulation, another wave of pleasure washed over you. Your throat grew sore from your incessant noises that now probably sounded like gibberish sprinkled with his name.
He slowly drew the metal shower head away from your core to carefully lull you from your high. You were nothing but a heaving, shakey, fucked out mess in his grasp.
“Good job baby.” He pressed a kiss to the side of your head. “You did so good for me.”
A lazy smile spread across your lips and nodded slightly. His warmth was the only thing tethering you to reality.
He let you recover from your orgasms before moving on. His hands found your hips once more and pressed you against him. You felt his own arousal thick and hard against your lower back and it reminded you of the ache between your legs that only he could fill.
“You wanna turn around for me baby?”
While you felt like utter mush in his hands, his offer sparked the potential of having him inside you, and that was something you didn’t plan to pass up on. You nodded and shifted around in the water, letting the liquid slosh around tub even spilling out a bit unintentionally. “Oops.” You giggled.
“Hi angel.” He says softly with a crooked smile painted across his lips the second his eyes meet yours. Sure, he held the reigns in the bedroom and most other areas of your relationship, but it was no secret that you were the one with complete control over him. You made him weak in ways he never imagined being, he would give you anything you wanted if you just batted your lashes at him. He was putty in your hands, and he loved it.
He looked so beautiful, and you suddenly felt scammed knowing that you had your back to him looking like that the whole time. His raven hair had fallen from the makeshift bun from the couch and was now splayed over his shoulders, the ends now damp and pointy. You couldn’t wait one more second without his lips on yours, so you scooped up his face in both hands and met his lips with yours. You broke the kiss to press your forehead against his, wanting to engulf yourself fully in his stormy eyes. “I love you.” You whispered.
“I love you too.” He replied matching your whisper. His hands found your hips again, pulling you towards him – not out of desire to intensify the moment, but simply to have you closer. “God, I love you more than anything.”
Peachy pink dusted your cheeks and the smile that his words brought to your lips was embarrassingly wide. You shied away from him and shook your head, “You’re being silly.” Out of all the grand things in his life, you were sure that you were the least exciting or interesting part.
His hand trailed warm water up your arm to pick up your chin, “I’d never joke about that.” His thumb grazed over your cheekbone, cupping your cheek. “I’m so grateful for the patience you’ve given me, given us. You might be the best thing to ever stumble into my life.”
Every atom in your body begged to mesh with him. It only took one exchanged look between you two for your bodies to rearrange so you could sit on his lap. Your lips collided, followed by a messy display of clashing teeth and hungry tongues. Your passion was fueled only by the blind love you had for him and your desire to prove that his love for you was warranted. Your fingers tangled into the base of his dark hair, tugging at it slightly needing every bit of him entwined with your very molecules. He kept one hand on your hip while the other held tangled in your own wet hair.
As much as you wanted to keep telling him how much you loved him, you couldn’t bear to break away from him even for a second. If you couldn’t tell him, you’d show him.
You rutted your hips up his thighs until you felt the base of his member rest against your bare cunt. He let a groan out into the kiss at the feeling of you against him. One of your hands fell from his hair to his length, your fingers instinctually molded around the silky soft flesh. It never ceased to impress you at just how big he was and no matter how many times you’d had him it never eased the ache of taking him.
His sizeable cock was decorated with bulging veins from the blood that coursed through him. Even though your fingers had grown to be expertly familiar with his anatomy, you still loved exploring him, tracing each vein with your fingertips. This earned you another grunt from somewhere deep in his chest and you pridefully smiled against the kiss.
You finally gave him what you knew he wanted, wrapping a hand around this girth and began palming him slowly. His member had a delicious upward curve to it that helped to reach the deepest and most sensitive part of you. Your mouth was watering at just the feeling of him in your hand – in that moment you could’ve sworn that you would do absolutely anything to have it inside you. It was not a want, but a carnal need.
He finally had enough and pulled from the kiss, “Baby, please.” He breathed out against your lips, his love drunk eyes heavy with lust as he looked up at you. “I need your pussy.” His chest rose and fell in time with yours, needing you just as badly as you needed him.
You nodded quickly against him before lifting yourself up enough to hover over him. Regardless of how much you wanted it, you still had to mentally prepare yourself for the initial pain. Nick helped align himself with your entrance while keeping a supportive hand on your hip bone. You exhaled a deep breath.
Sensing your hesitation, he gave your hip a small squeeze, “You can take it baby, just go nice and slow. We have all the time in the world.” He reassured you, letting you set the pace.
You nodded and carefully began to sink down on him. A hiss escaped your mouth at the way his width stretched you open. Your hand fell to his shoulder for support as you struggled to pull yourself further down.
Nicholas’ eyes couldn’t soak you up enough, he was mesmerized at the sight of you. He wished he could burn it into his brain. “God, you look so fucking pretty taking my cock.”
His compliment only made you more determined to push past the pain and discomfort. When you felt your cervix land on his tip you knew that was as far as you could take him. While you couldn’t reach his base fully, you were still surprised and proud of yourself for being able to take so much of him in that position.
He let out a low groan at the feeling of your cunt tightly enveloping his cock. “You feel so fucking good.”
You expelled a breath then swirled your hips with him still deep inside you. The goal was to adjust to his size before riding him. The stretch burned but you knew it’d sweeten once you started moving.
The way he gazed up at you made you weak and your body gave into him, falling into the crook of his neck. You began placing open mouth kisses on his tattooed throat while your hips started swiveling on him. Light, airy moans tumbled from you lips and onto his neck. His hands gripped your hips tighter, letting out a grunt from somewhere deep in his chest.
“Fuck,” He groaned, letting his head fall back into the ledge of the tub. “I need you to move baby, I need more.”
You nodded quickly, needing it just as badly. Your hands slipped off him to stabilize yourself on the porcelain ledge. It gave you enough balance to raise your hips up almost fully, before dropping them where he filled you the fullest.
“That’s it, you’re doing so good.” He groaned out, his eyes droopy and drunken by only his love for you.
The praise helped motivate you to keep going even though the stretch burned. But you got to control the pace and the depth you could handle – although part of you wished he did have control so that he would forego any hindrances and use you up fully.
You gained momentum on him, bouncing up and down on his cock. Water splashed everywhere, over the ledge and all over the floor but that was the furthest thing on your mind. The room was filled with moans, grunts and cursed from both of you. You felt the knot beginning to form in your tummy as did he. But his surprises weren’t done yet.
He reached over to where he’d placed the shower head, easily flipping it on to the previous setting. Your eyes rounded as he began to lower it towards the water and you shook your head vigorously. “No, no, no.” You cried. “I won’t last, please, no.”
His other hand drifted down your spine with a feather light touch. “Well, that’s the point sweetheart.” He hummed. “Don’t you wanna cum again for me baby?” He questioned patronizingly. You knew that tone and you knew it meant it wouldn’t be as easy as he was eluding.
He continued his actions and aimed the powerful stream of water directly at your clit. A jolt of pure electricity zipped up your spine and down your thighs. Your entire body shuddered at the sudden and intense sensation. Your fingertips curled into his skin, surely branding claw marks into his flesh. “God, fuck.” You exclaimed loudly, barely able to move.
“Now, baby, remember that cumming is a privilege remember? I could very well leave you all worked up with your pretty pussy clenching around nothing if you misbehave.” He warned. “Do you understand?”
You nodded quickly, slipping your tongue between your lips. But that of course wasn’t enough for him.
His hand tightened on your hip and brought the shower head a bit closer to heighten the sensation. “I believe I asked you a question darling.” His voice deep and raspier than normal. “Do you understand? You know I need to hear it.”
“Yes,” You shuddered out. “Yes, sir. I understand.” You couldn’t seem to catch your breath, the air in your lungs completely vacant. Your heart thumped so hard against your ribcage you thought it might shatter and burst in front of him and splinter his own chest.
“Good girl.” He praised. “Now, I don’t remember telling you that you could stop moving.”
You whined in near agony, squeezing your eyes shut and slowly beginning your movements again. “Fuck.” You lulled your head back, buzzing pleasure spreading through every bit of you.
“Faster.” He commanded. “Or I’m gonna make this very unpleasant for you.”
His sweetness was long gone and replaced by the Nick you had grown very familiar with. You’d never guess by his normal relaxed and reserved demeanor that he’d have this overwhelming dominance in bed, but you loved it. It was as though something in him would take over, like he’d try to fight it to stay sweet and romantic, but it rarely lost the fight. It was thrilling to watch his internal battle; you’d seen it so often that you had memorized the shift in his eyes and subtle change in his cadence.
You rarely chose to challenge his threats and today was no different, So, you began lifting and dropping your hips against his lap, taking in fully – or as much as you could anyway. His free hand slithered up your side to cup your breast, kneading the plump flesh in his grasp. His stare couldn’t seem to stay on any solid one part of you, darting from your tits bouncing as you moved, to your face contorting with the overwhelming pleasures you were experiencing, to down where you were connecting with him. He looked at you the way people look at monuments or ancient architecture. He didn’t care about a single other wonder in the world because he was convinced you were the only one in existence. You were an art museum to him, every single installation he could study for hours and never grow bored of your beauty and the delicate nature of your soul. He was utterly infatuated with and devoted to you.
It became difficult to continue riding him without getting sloppy from another orgasm building quickly in your stomach. Your clit was buzzing and threatening to tip you over the edge at any moment. The way he filled you up only made it worse – being full of him made the time without him even more empty. You’d never had someone fill you up so much, he made it hard to even clench around him. It was an incredible experience and one that would make having anyone else subpar. He had set the bar so high that it made it impossible for anyone else to measure up to him. If he ever decided he’d had enough of you, you’d spend the rest of your days seeking bits of him in anyone you ever let touch you. He’d certainly haunt you worse than phantom ever could.
Thankfully, from the way his cock throbbed and bounced inside you, told you that he was getting close too. Your heart thumped so hard in your throat that you questioned if you’d even be able to speak.
“I-I’m close.” You whimpered out. “Can I cum?”
He tsked at the request. “Now baby, I taught you better that. You’re forgetting my favorite word. Try again.”
Your palms dug into his chest at his rebuttal. “Fuck.” You closed your eyes attempting to stave off your orgasm. “Fuck, please.” You begged. “God, fuck, please, I need to cum. Please can I cum?”
“Hm.” He feigned a thought. “No, not yet. Hold it.”
You shook your head vigorously, “No, no, no, please I can’t. I won’t make it, I’m so close. I don’t know if I’ll be able to stop it.”
“You can and you will.” He said simply. “And if you don’t, you don’t wanna know how much you’ll regret it.”
His face was serious, but you could tell that the excitement was growing in his belly too. You swore that he thrived over your desperation, he loved seeing you squirm and bringing to the edge of your limits. It was sadistic the way he was fueled by your anguish. You don’t know if you’d ever admit it, but you enjoyed being commanded and used like a plaything. Being at his mercy was a thrill you loved chasing, especially knowing he’d always catch you.
You scrunched your eyes closed and bore down on your teeth holding on to the tattered thread left holding you on to your sanity. “Fuck.” You breathed out. It was almost painful how your sensitive nub throbbed beneath the powerful stream of water and how tight the knot in your tummy had grown. His tip assaulting your cervix intensified everything and overbearing pleasure was looming merely seconds way from shattering your resolve. “Fuck, fuck.” You whined. “Fuck, please, please let me cum, I need it so bad. Please I don’t want to disobey you but I’m so close, I need to cum, please – fuck, I can’t hold it, fuck fuck, please can I cum?” Your pathetic groveling was a pitiful display, but it was one that Nicholas could barely handle himself. He could get off from the hymns of your desperation alone.
“Fuck I love when you sound like that.” He groaned. “Fine baby, cum all over my fucking cock.” If he hadn’t been so close himself, he surely would’ve stretched out the torture.
As if you needed anymore help, he brought the shower head even closer. The heightened sensation instantly blinded you, causing your entire body shudder as sparking euphoria bloomed from your core. This orgasm was more powerful than the others due to the delayed pleasure and his length hitting your sensitive spot directly. The moans and curses that left your mouth were vulgar and smeared with the unholy devotion you had for him. Every cell in your body belonged to him just as he demanded it.
Your walls tightly clenching around him was his tipping point. “God, you look so fucking good with my cock so deep inside you.” He growled, gripping your hip hard enough to leave bruises behind. “Fuck baby you’re gonna make me cum.”
You were too lost in your own bliss to really hear what he said until you felt his length twitch inside you followed by his warm seed filling your core. If you weren’t so overspent, the feeling alone could’ve sent you into another orgasm – but seeing as you were still working through your own, you weren’t that concerned about it.
As you both came floating down from your highs, he flipped off the shower head and set it to the side ledge. You had fallen on his chest while your heaving chests rose and fell in time with each other’s. His fingertips raked through the slightly damp hair of your scalp. You purred and smiled at the affection gesture.
He grinned at the reaction, “I love you.” His buttery words fell from his lips in a tone just above a whisper.
Nick would never admit it, but he was extremely talented at almost anything he ever picked up. If he gave it a good honest try, it wouldn’t take long for it to become second nature. He never imagined that there would be anything in the world that would come easier than a graphite pencil or tattoo gun or almost any instrument he picked up. He knew his tattoo gun and his favorite guitar like the back of his hand and while he’d never fully believe it, he already knew you that way too. As with everything else, just because he was a master-of-all didn’t mean there were never any bumps or challenges or hardships – pencils snap, tattoo guns malfunction, and sometimes strings don’t want to tune just how you want them - above all else, Nicholas knew that the most. He knew the best things in life were never easy, but that never stopped him before and it certainly wasn’t going to stop him now.
“I love you too.” You muttered sleepily into the crook of his neck.
The satisfaction of inking a particularly difficult design or mastering a challenging new riff could never compare to the feeling he got from hearing you say those words.
“C’mon, let’s get you dry and warm.” He gently patted your hip and you nodded, using every bit of strength in your body to sit yourself upright.
Nicholas was incredible in his element. It’s one thing to be able to take control sexually, but it’s a whole other thing to be able take gentle control outside of that – and he did, effortlessly. He carefully pulled you off him and got you standing on your feet. He only allowed the air conditioning to dance on your skin for a millisecond before he wrapped a big fluffy towel around you. You tugged the terrycloth fabric so tight against your skin that you were sure you’d have imprints of the threads embedding into your skin. When you lifted your leg over the porcelain, you felt the familiar ache between your thighs that always came from loving him. It wasn’t the worst you’d felt, since you had set the pace, but the water supplied no lubrication, and you were definitely feeling the repercussions.
Nick wrapped a towel around his waist and unplugged the bath drain. When he finally made his way back over to you. When you were both barefoot it really emphasized just how much he actually towered over you. The water droplets glistening across his tan, inked skin made him look like a work of art. Your eyes traced his collarbones and landed on the thorny pendent you were fidgeting with before.
“Oh yeah, before I forget.” You didn’t realize what he was doing until he pulled the necklace from neck and gently draped it over your head. It landed way longer on your chest but it didn’t matter. Your fingers found the pendent and immediately rubbed it for comfort.
“I can’t take this.” You claimed, but the smile that had already made home on your face said otherwise.
He smiled and took your jaw into one hand and placed his other hand over yours covering the necklace. “I’ll always be with you now. If you miss me or get anxious just squeeze it, and I’ll be right there with you. Okay?”
Tears burned your eyes, but you were determined to keep it together, the last thing you wanted to do was cry in front of him naked and shivering. You nodded quickly, “Thank you.” You whispered, hiding a sniffle.
“You’re welcome baby.” He said and placed a quick kiss to your forehead.
He gently grasped your shoulders giving them a little rub to warm you up before guiding you back into the bedroom. The edges of his lips dipped into a frown the second he noticed your limping.
“Oh baby, did I hurt you? I knew we should’ve gotten out of the bath-” He always began to panic ramble if he thought he might’ve hurt you or not taken care of you properly.
You giggled at his worrisome nature and placed a finger over his lips. “It’s okay, really.” You reassured and watched his anxiety disappear. “But it does hurt.” Your lips pulled together in a pout. “Fix it?”
A small smile pulled across his lips and he nodded knowing exactly what that meant.
The time after with Nicholas somehow always felt more intimate. He was driven to love you the best way he knew how, and you relished in the safety he wrapped you in. No matter how rough he got in bed, afterwards he always handled you like a freshly plucked gardenia. He was convinced that if he even grabbed you the wrong way you’d crumble. But he loved it, he was sure that if he was put on this earth to do one thing, it was to take care of you.
After applying some numbing cream where you ached the most and getting you into some fresh pajamas, you were finally exactly where you wanted to be. You were tucked right into Nick’s side, cozy under the covers, sharing a pint of pistachio ice cream while watching reruns of your favorite mutual comfort show.
You looked up at him when he laughed at something silly in the show and the glow from the tv illuminated his features beautifully through the darkness. In that moment, he gave you every bit of reassurance you needed to handle him being gone. You were his and he was yours, and as long as you loved him, he’s always come home to you if you let him.
He glanced down at you, catching you in your admiring stare. The edges of his lips pulled taut into a wide, toothy smile.
“Bob’s Burgers is over there you know.” He teased, tilting his head across the room.
You giggled and burrowed your face into his chest. “You’re much more entertaining.”
He chuckled in disbelief, “Am I?”
“Mhm.” You hummed, getting sleepy the second your head touched his chest.
He laughed softly and precariously plucking the empty pint of pistachio from your dozing grasp to put on the bedside table. He pulled you closer to him and tugged the fluffy duvet higher to cover you both.
Before you let sleep envelope you, you felt his fingers tenderly massaging your scalp. “I love you.” He whispered.
“I love you too, Nicholas.” You hummed back lovingly, nuzzling into his chest.
Taglist; @neverknoah @lma1986 @baddestomens @deathblacksmoke @philomenie @blacksoul-27 @thcfountain
A/N; Thank you so much for reading, i hope you liked it, lmk if you did<3
#nicholas ruffilo fanfic#nicholas ruffilo fic#bad omens fanfic#bad omens fic#nick ruffilo fic#nick ruffilo fanfic#nicholas ruffilo fanfiction#nick ruffilo fanfiction#nicholas ruffilo smut#nicholas ruffilo fluff#concreteburialplot works#kind of repetitive my bad#just ignore it
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I love finding characters I can relate (/project onto) within media. There’s something so comforting about seeing yourself on screen. I end up headcanoning most of them to be in-line with my identities (lesbian, wasian, autistic) because they are literally me in my head!!
Anyway here’s a long ass list of my favorite characters and why I head canon them as autistic for fun!! If you have any others you’d like to add I’d love to hear them. (And please note this is just my interpretation, and highly based on my experience with autism. I’m not saying they’re definitely autistic or that all the traits I listed are the dsm-5 criteria or something.)
Princess Bubblgeum from adventure time:
This girl is peak evil scientist autistic. Her intense need for control, the way she carefully observes the citizens she created, an outsider to them, not quite like them… god it’s so perfect. I read her as being somewhat low empathy as well, it’s hard for her to change her perspective to that of others. Plus the fact her brother neddy is a pretty obvious metaphor for higher supports needs autism. I think they of represent how autism runs in the family and appears in all sorts of different ways in different people. They’re sort of two different representations of the spectrum.
Marcy wu from amphibia
I mean this one is just obvious. The biggest nerd of all time. So obsessed with her RPG special interest that she literally sucks her and her friends into a fantasy world. She’s clumsy (just like me fr), very smart but super socially awkward, a little oblivious and naive. She’s terrified of change, especially if it means abandoning the few social bonds she’s been able to make. I honestly find it hard to believe this wasn’t intentional.
Entrapta from she-ra
Another pretty overt example. I do have some issues with how she was portrayed in the show- (keeping her on a leash was weird.) but overall I really love her. She understands her tech, not people, and it can cause her to come into conflict with other characters. Their treatment of her makes me sad at times, but it’s realistic. I also love some of her other quirks, her love of tiny food, her exitable demeanor, ect.
Pearl from Steven Universe
Peridot is the more obvious example of an autistic character in SU, and while I agree she’s coded that way, I personally resonate more with Pearl. She is not very socially aware, and bothered by disruptions to her routine/ broader life changes. She doesn’t like to break rules (despite being a literal rebel lol.) I find it interesting how she seems to have the poorest understanding of life on earth out of the gems, despite having lived here for thousands of years. She is graceful, but has an almost sort of awkward gangly-ness to her that I relate to. Her neuroticism is also very similar to how my anxiety disorder presents.
Pearl has a tendency to infodump, without realizing those around her are uninterested. Even her relationship with Rose struck a chord with me. The hopeless devotion to her, the way she followed along at her side. It’s how many of my friendships have been. Obvious it’s not exactly the same considering Pearl having originally been her servant, but while not being an explicitly autistic trait, that sort of clingy, starstruck relationship is something autistic people are prone to developing. She does little hand stims at times too that I love to see.
Poison Ivy (specifically the version in the Harley Quinn animated show)
I’m surprised I haven’t seen more people mention poison Ivy. Fiercely intelligent and deeply introverted, she isolates herself from all people, and only connects with and understands her plants. (Which her deep affinity for can definitely be read as a special interest.) She very overtly has trouble forming relationships with others.
She’s blunt, socially awkward and a loner, has something of a flat effect and a monotone voice. Those around her initially read her as cold and impersonable.Her struggle with social anxiety as well as intense fear of failure/ low self esteem is also very relatable to me. She also often struggles to express/understand her feelings and emotions. Her radical political ideas and the fact that she’s literally an ecoterrorist paints her as having a very strong sense of justice and a somewhat black and white worldview. (Me)
Finally, her relationship with Harley just SCREAMS neurodivergent solidarity. Harley Quinn is (I think canonically) adhd, and they’re both outsiders in the world that found each other and just… get each other. She’s Ivy’s closest and only friend and amazing girlfriend and god it’s all so perfect.
They remind me a lot of the relationship I have with my best friend with adhd except theirs is gayer.
#autistic headcanon#autism headcanon#headcanon#headcanons#actuallyautistic#actually autistic#neurodivergent#neurodiversity#neurodivergent headcanon#adventure time#princess bubblegum#amphibia#marcy wu#she ra#entrapta#steven universe#pearl su#poison ivy#harley quinn animated series
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Dropped Call, Chapter 2
Rated X / 3700 words / posted on AO3 / Tagging @today-in-fic
They’re in Lakeland, Florida and it’s been pissing rain since they hit the tarmac in Tampa. Between the inability to keep his loafers dry, the fact that he forgot his glasses, and the lack of cable in his motel room, Mulder is in a seriously bad fucking mood. He even turned down dinner with Scully, something that is typically the highlight of his day on assignment, to spare her from his grouchiness. He always hates himself when he’s an asshole to her for no justifiable reason, and right now he doesn’t possess the capacity to regulate his emotions as effectively as he’d need to to avoid it.
At this point, he’s come to the conclusion that the phone call was some kind of hyper-realistic dream or fantasy. Given, the facts don’t totally line up in support of that theory, but it’s easier to operate under the belief that it never happened than it is to accept the idea that it did happen but will never be spoken of, much less acted on. Easier than accepting that he unwittingly divulged graphic details regarding his sexual fantasies about Scully to Scully herself, and she was so horrified that she can only cope by acting as though the phone call never took place at all.
But was she really horrified? His memory of the exact words spoken by each of them isn’t especially sharp, given that he thought he was speaking to Electra, but he’s pretty sure he remembers her asking him questions, goading him into sharing more. And he knows that he correctly recalls what she said about “enjoying other meals,” because by then he knew exactly what he’d done and who he was speaking to, and the high he experienced in light of her confession lasted well into the following day, right up until he knocked on her door with a paper bag containing tom kah gai in hand.
She hadn’t acted strangely, aside from the general lethargy caused by her cold, and that in itself struck him as strange. She ate her soup, smiled at him while he detailed the creative ways he’d wasted time that morning in her absence, and then yawned and said she was going to take a nap. It’s not that he was expecting her to bring up the phone call or kiss him goodbye or something, but he thought things would feel…different. He certainly felt different.
But weeks have passed, and she has more than fully recovered from her cold, yet there is nary a hint of increased sexual tension between the two of them. In fact, there’s been a distinct lack of their typical casual flirtations, almost like they’ve regressed. What conclusion can he come to other than she’s just not interested? She seems to want to pretend it never happened, and for lack of a better option he’s done the same.
He calls the front desk again, hoping that he’ll get someone other than the exceedingly unhelpful young man who offered apologies regarding the lack of cable, but no solutions. After speaking to the night shift manager at length, his options are to move to a room clear on the other side of the complex, or go without.
“Let me think about it and call you back,” he says, then slams the phone down on the receiver with more force than is necessary and flops onto the bed.
Within seconds the phone is ringing and he picks it back up, expecting to hear the night manager on the other end.
“Yeah?”
“Hey, it’s me.”
He can hear the ghost of her voice through the poorly insulated wall between their rooms, a murmuring, indecipherable vibration.
“Hey, what’s up?”
“I was going to ask if you wanted the rest of this pizza, but I kept getting a busy signal so it’s probably cold now,” she says.
“I’ll never understand your aversion to cold pizza,” he says.
She makes a noncommittal little noise, and then they are quiet for a beat.
“So who were you talking to?” she asks.
Her voice is a bit higher than normal, giving away her attempt to appear disinterested in the answer, and that, in turn, piques Mulder’s curiosity.
“Who do you think?” he replies, just to see what she’ll say.
Scully scoffs as though this confirms what she already suspected.
“Please send my regards to Electra,” she snarks. The reference to their previously unmentionable phone call sends a shock of adrenaline through him. He can’t think of anything to say, so he just doesn’t say anything. “What time do you want to head out tomorrow?” Scully says quickly, changing the subject, and he can nearly feel her embarrassment radiating through the wall.
“Nine?” he suggests, and she grunts her agreement. There’s another pregnant pause, and he decides to seize the opportunity. “I told Electra about what happened,” he says, his heart pounding loudly in his ears.
“Oh?” Scully says after a beat.
“Mmhmm,” Mulder replies, summoning courage. “She said you’re going to put her out of a job.”
Scully huffs an uncomfortable little laugh.
“I highly doubt that,” she says quietly.
They’ve never had an issue with awkward silences. As many hours as they spend in one another’s company, it’s just not possible to avoid lulls in conversation, and he’s long appreciated the fact that Scully doesn’t try to fill them with meaningless drivel. An unfortunate side effect of this is that on those occasions where they are intentionally avoiding a specific topic of conversation, the weight of those unfilled silences is practically unbearable.
He wants to ask her so many questions. Why didn't she tell him it was her? Was she disgusted by what he said? What did her cryptic comment about “enjoying other meals” really mean? Is this a door she never wants to open, or does she just need him to open it for her so they can both walk through?
“I’m sorry about that, by the way,” he blurts out, inexplicably compelled to keep them on this subject. “We’ve never talked about it, but I realize that it was probably really weird for you and…sorry.”
Part of him knows he’s fishing for information. If she accepts his apology, he can take that to mean that an apology was due. If she refutes the need for one, that will tell him something entirely different.
She doesn’t do either of those things.
“Well, I could have hung up,” she says, her tone inscrutable.
“But you didn’t,” he says, equally ambiguous.
“No,” she says.
The silence is so fucking heavy it makes him feel sick.
“Why is that?” he ventures. “Just out of curiosity.”
He hears her pull in a slow, deep breath and then expel it in a huff.
“I’m not sure,” she finally says. He can’t tell whether she’s obfuscating.
“Were you offended?”
“...No.”
“Surprised?”
“Very.”
“Was that surprise of the pleasant or unpleasant variety?” he asks, switching the handset from one ear to the other so he can wipe his sweaty palms on the bedspread.
He’s listening so intently that he hears both the wet sounds of her tongue moving around inside her mouth in search of words, as well as the creak of bed springs as she shifts uncomfortably on the mattress.
“I’m not sure how to answer that,” she says after a time.
What the fuck does that mean? He wonders. He could logically conclude that she was into it, between the not hanging up, the asking of questions, and the hesitance to outright say whether it bothered her. But this is Scully, and the risk of making an incorrect assumption is not one he is willing to take.
“How long have you been talking to her?” she asks, and at first he doesn’t understand the question. Talking to who?
“Oh, I was actually talking to the front desk,” he says, realizing that he never corrected her. “The cable in my room is out.”
“Oh,” she says. “So you didn’t really tell her about what happened?”
Her tone is strange and foreign to him. She sounds uncertain, insecure almost.
“I did, a few weeks ago.”
“Hm.”
“To answer your question, I’ve been talking to her for….I guess a little over a year now,” he says.
This would typically be an embarrassing thing to disclose, but her active participation in a phone call of the same nature makes him feel like she doesn’t really have a place to judge. He also finds her curiosity regarding Electra compelling, though he can’t really say why.
“Oh,” she says, sounding surprised. “That’s a long time. With one person, I mean.”
“Yeah, I guess.”
He can tell there’s something she’s not saying. Something she wants to ask him, or wants to know but is unwilling to ask. He has an overwhelming urge to tell her everything, to detail the ways that talking to Electra helps him cope with having to bury his feelings for Scully every weekday between the hours of 9-5, plus most weekends. He wants to tell her that it’s not just about sex, though it was the night he ended up with her on the line. That Electra knows exactly what Scully looks like, down to the little mole on her upper lip, and that she snorts if he manages to make her laugh hard enough. That for every time he’s jerked off while telling Electra what he wishes he could do with Scully physically, there were two phone calls where he kept his pants on and told her how tormented he is by his inability to get closer to her emotionally.
“It’s not always like that,” he says, opting for a less detailed disclosure. “Most of the time when I talk to her, we just talk.”
“About what?” she asks, and he immediately feels his face get hot.
“I feel like you already know the answer to that,” he says, equally mortified and irritated. It doesn’t seem fair for her to feign ignorance at this point.
Scully is quiet, but he knows her mind is racing. He can feel it, a frenetic crackle against the shell of his ear.
“I guess I do,” she says when he’s just about to ask if she’s still there. “I don’t want you to think…” she starts. He waits for her to find the right words. “I don’t want you to think I was offended or that I’m upset about what happened,” she says carefully. “I realize that it might seem like I am, so I just wanted you to know that I’m not.”
“Okay,” he says uncertainly. This is good news, in a way, but it’s also non-news.
“I also owe you an apology,” she continues. “It was inappropriate of me not to tell you as soon as I realized. I violated your privacy, and I’m very sorry for that.”
“No apology needed,” he says. A beat passes. This is ridiculous. “Can we just—Look, I know this is awkward, and I know you’re a private person, but can we just—”
“I don’t think I’m ready to do that,” she interrupts him, her voice urgent and a little afraid.
He takes a moment to absorb this.
“You’re not ready to talk about it,” he says, and she hums in confirmation. “But you’re….interested? Open to it? Eventually?”
“Eventually,” she repeats. “Not now.”
“Okay,” he says, satisfied that he understands the situation. “I can and will respect that.”
“Thank you.”
“See you at 9 tomorrow?”
“Yep.”
He hangs up the phone and folds his hands over his belly, staring at the dusty popcorn ceiling as he thinks back through it all. A little smile plays at the corners of his mouth. Eventually isn’t something he can necessarily look forward to, but it’s a hell of a lot better than never.
The phone rings, and reaches across the nightstand to answer it.
“Hello?”
“Hi.”
Mulder’s eyebrows furrow. The voice is definitely female, but he can’t immediately place it
“Hi. Who’s this?”
The caller clears her throat.
“Uh, this is…it’s Electra,” she says.
A hot flush spreads out over his entire body, and there’s a slight ringing in his ears.
“Hi,” he says, sitting up. “How are you?”
“I’m well,” she says. “What are you doing?”
He hears the vibration of her voice from the other side of the wall, the cadence of it a millisecond ahead of what comes to his ear through the phone.
“I’m just relaxing,” he says. He suddenly doesn’t know how to behave. “I’m at a motel and there’s no cable in my room.”
“Oh no,” she says. “What are you going to do to entertain yourself?”
Her tone is awkward and unconfident, but he understands what she’s going for and plays along.
“I don’t know,” he says, swinging his feet over the side of the bed. “Any ideas?”
“Well,” she says, her voice just this side of shaky. “You could tell me about another one of your fantasies, if you want.”
There is a rush of blood to his lap that makes him momentarily lightheaded. She’s really doing this.
“Okay,” he says, but his mind goes blank. What is she hoping to hear? What if he says something she finds offensive? This is a lot harder when he knows it’s Scully he’s talking to. “Give me a second to think of something.”
“Last time we talked, you said you had other fantasies of the same nature,” she says hesitantly.
“I do,” he confirms. “I just…sorry, you just caught me off guard.”
“I can relate,” she says with just a hint of coyness, and that makes him relax a little.
He lays back down on the bed and closes his eyes. If he’s going to do this, he has to pretend it’s really Electra on the line.
“Okay,” he says. “Something that’s important to know for context is that she loves to take baths.”
“She?”
Mulder opens his eyes, taken out of the moment. He never has to specify with Electra; there’s only one “she” he’s ever referring to.
“My partner,” he says reluctantly.
“Oh,” she replies. “Okay, go ahead.”
Mulder closes his eyes again and lets the image of his fantasy fill his mind. The tiled walls of Scully’s bathroom, the bright smell of her lavender bubble bath, her dirty clothes in a heap on the floor by the tub.
“One of my fantasies is that I stop by her apartment unannounced, and I hear her call out for me to let myself in. So I use my key, and once I’m inside she tells me that she’s in the bath.” He pauses to see if she has any commentary on this, but she says nothing. “I start talking to her through the door, which is something I’ve done a handful of times, but in my fantasy she tells me to come in.” Another pause. All he hears is her even breathing. “She’s in the bath, but it’s so full of bubbles that I can’t see anything. I sit on a little stool beside the tub and we keep talking.”
His heart is pounding. He can’t just say this to her.
“And then what?” she asks. Mulder swallows.
“And then…I end up touching her under the bubbles,” he says, glazing over the rest of the details and making use of a euphemism.
Scully laughs a little.
“I think you may have skipped some things,” she says gently, and he cringes.
“Sorry. I don’t want to be too graphic.”
“Why?”
“I guess I’m worried I’ll offend you,” he says.
“What if I promise not to be offended?” she offers.
“Is that something you can reasonably promise?”
“I guess we’ll find out.”
“Okay,” Mulder says, sucking in a steadying breath. “I’m sitting next to the tub and we’re talking. After a while some of the bubbles start to dissolve and I can kind of see her body. Not details, just sort of the contrast of her skin, and—” he pauses, then forces himself to say the next part. “I can see darker areas, like her nipples and her pubic hair.”
Scully hums, an indication that she’s following along. That she’s listening.
“She’s talking about how much stress she’s been under. I think in the fantasy I kind of know that she’s been having a hard time and I’m worried about her.”
“Interesting,” Scully says, her voice breathy.
“Why is that interesting?” he asks.
“Oh…just…I guess I find it interesting that her emotional state factors into your fantasy,” she observes without judgment. “That was also true in the previous fantasy you shared.”
He doesn’t miss the fact that she’s referring to herself in the third person. And she isn’t wrong.
“So she’s talking about how stressed out she is,” he continues, shifting his hips around as his erection begs to be touched, “and I tell her I can help. I ask if she’ll let me.”
“What do you say, exactly?” she asks.
He reaches down and gives his cock a squeeze. “I say something like, ‘I know what you need,’ and then I look at her body under the bubbles. I’m not very explicit.”
“Why?”
“Because in this fantasy we’ve never done anything like that before, so I wouldn’t just come out and say it directly. That would be too forward for her.”
“So you want it to be realistic?” she asks.
“Sometimes.”
“Okay, so you tell her that you know what she needs. What does she say?” Scully says, getting them back on track.
“She doesn’t really say anything. Her eyes get wide, and she looks down and realizes that she’s slowly being exposed. She’s embarrassed, but she’s also excited.”
“How do you know?”
“Because she’s not telling me to get the fuck out of her bathroom,” he says lightly, and she laughs.
“So what do you do next?”
“I reach out and touch her knee, which is above the water. And then I watch her face as I run my fingers down the inside of her thigh.”
“You don’t kiss her?”
“Not yet.”
“Does she stop you?”
“No. She just looks at me. Her eyes are still all big and her mouth is open. She’s breathing hard. And then she moves her other leg to the side.” He swears he hears the tiniest little moan slip through the phone. “Hey, can I ask you something?”
“What?” she asks, though it’s unclear whether she’s asking what his question is or if she’s just confused by his divergence from the story.
“When we talked before, when I told you about my other fantasy?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Were you, um…did you touch yourself?”
She’s quiet for so long that he gets his dick out and gives it a few strokes before leaving it to rest, stiff and aching, against his belly.
“Yes.”
His dick lurches, standing at attention briefly before it flops to the side. He doesn’t want to come before this is over, lest his post-nut clarity ruin the rest of the experience, so he tries to touch it as little as possible.
“She moves her other leg to the side so I know without a doubt that she wants it. When I touch her, she closes her eyes and moans right away. Even under the water I can feel how wet she is. How slippery. I ask her again to let me help, but this time I say, ‘let me make you come, Scully.’”
She gasps a little, and he realizes that he used her name. He’s never used her name with Electra.
“What does she say?” Scully asks, nearly whining. Her voice is high and tight, and he wants to know so badly if she’s touching herself again now.
“She says, ‘we can’t.’ But she’s pushing her hips into my hand even when she’s saying it so I don’t stop. I know she wants it. I put one finger inside her and she just…she melts.”
“Oh,” Scully breathes out. It’s unclear whether it’s commentary on the story or a vocalization of whatever she’s doing over there.
“I get rid of the stool and I kneel beside the tub so I can kind of lean over into it for leverage. And that’s when I kiss her. Or I try to, but she can barely kiss because of what I’m doing to her with my hand. I add a second finger and she’s throbbing like crazy.”
“Yes,” Scully says in encouragement.
“Are you touching yourself?” he asks quickly, his tone unchanged from his narration.
“Yes,” she says again.
Mulder squeezes his cock in his fist.
“Me too.”
Another, “Oh.”
“I curl my fingers up towards her belly, and then I get my thumb on her clit. She’s holding on to the sides of the tub for leverage and practically fucking my hand, she wants it so bad.”
“Uh huh.”
He can’t hold back anymore. He strokes his cock frantically fast, pumping his hips up off the mattress as though thrusting. He no longer has the capacity to worry about how graphic he’s being.
“Then she comes. She comes so hard she can’t speak, can’t breathe. And her cunt is just…god she’s so tight. And all I can think about is how good it would feel to be inside her when she’s coming.”
Scully gasps, and suddenly the line goes dead. Through the wall, he hears a long, low moan, and then a series of high staccato whimpers. He explodes forcefully into his own hand, sending ropes of cum up as far as his chest and completely defiling his last clean T-shirt. He still has the phone propped against his ear and his cock in hand, slippery and quickly softening, when he hears a click, and then her voice comes back through the open line.
“Mulder?”
He sits up quickly, which makes his head spin.
“Yeah?”
“I was thinking, can we leave at 8:30 tomorrow? I’d like to stop for some decent coffee if we can make time.”
Mulder blinks stupidly, disoriented.
“Uh, yeah, 8:30 is fine. Are you…you’re good?”
“Yeah, I’m great,” she says simply.
“Okay. Goodnight, then.”
“Goodnight. Sleep well.”
Mulder sets the phone back on the receiver and looks down at his cum-streaked lap and belly. That absolutely happened, there is no doubt in his mind.
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Hi! I hope you’re doing well
for the ask game,how about higuchi?
Higuchi, my beloved!!
Favorite thing about them:
She's just... Very funny and messy and relatable. She has SO NOT her life together. It's nice to see a character that feels human once in a while.
Least favorite thing about them:
She's so dismissed by the author, and yet she feels like she has so much potential... I really wish the narrative would explore her character more. Not only, I wish she was treated with more sensitivity and respect. You can write about abuse; I dare say, it's a good thing to write about abuse! But you should be respectful about it, and DEFINITELY not treat it as a gag. A lot of Higuchi's character - the physical abuse she faces, her infatuation with her abuser - make very interesting themes you can explore in literature; just do so in a way that doesn't stripe the character of dignity, you know? Which a lot of times feels like what's being done to Higuchi.
Favorite line:
brOTP:
Pretty much Higuchi and any pm member, Gin, Tachihara, Hirotsu (Gin especially, I find the whole “call me onee-san” thing Higuchi has going on with her very endearing). I really like the tough front she assumes when facing the ada, and I've found her interactions with Atsushi really cute, I'd like to see more of them. Also, I totally believe Higuchi and Kunikida are online friends who don't know they actually know each other irl. I really like to explore her relationship with Akutagawa, I wish once Akutagawa has matured to be a decent human being they could be like. Cordial coworkers.
OTP:
I really wish she would stay single tbh. Right now I find it hard to imagine her having an healthy romantic relationship with anyone? Which is what I wish for her, to be healthy and happy, a lot more than for other characters lol. She's just very easy to sympathize with.
nOTP:
I've talked about how I'm not a big fan of higu/gin, but I don't take issues with it either, it's not that deep.
Random headcanon:
About how she ended up in the mafia. She and her sister were raised by a single mother; when she died, Higuchi had to struggle to find a way to sustain the both of them. Stumbling on the streets, at some point someone posed a threat for her sister, and Higuchi assumed a very aggressive and violent stance to defend her. Akutagawa was passing by, and was struck by Higuchi's ardency, as well as her determination to protect her little sister even with her bare hands; so he took her in.
Unpopular opinion:
I wish her romantic feelings for Akutagawa were acknowledged a little more. In general, the fandom openly discusses Akutagawa and Dazai's relationship, while the Higuchi and Akutagawa one, who mirrors it for the most part, gets largely dismissed. On one hand, I get it's unpleasant to talk about, since it evokes concepts of work harassment and women domestic abuse that are often disturbing to talk about since more often than not hit close to home. At the same time, that just translates in not talking about a big side of Higuchi's character that makes her complex and realistic, which is sad too.
Song i associate with them:
Melt by ryo, perhaps? It's one of my favourite songs :)
Favorite picture of them:
Favourite panel from the manga:
Favourite illustration:
Favourite illustration in the anime art style:
Favourite Mayoi card:
Send me a character?
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Rick and Morty S7 Ep. 3: Air Force Wong
(We’ve come a long way since Pickle Rick)
Spoiler Alert. Can’t say I didn’t warn you.
My Favs
Unity!
Really wasn’t expecting to ever see them again so it was a pleasant surprise! Bringing back Unity could have crossed the line into being too fan service-y but I think they were incorporated into the ongoing story of the Rick/Rick Prime saga nicely.
“Don’t be a Space Mormon!”:
But immediately being apologetic about making fun of the SS agent’s religion.
“I volunteer to do acid to prove I’m not a cop!”:
Me too. Me too
President’s cellphone wallpaper:
Rick and the President posing with a recently caught Nessie cracked me up more than it should have.
“Call in a chopper. I’m being cockblocked!”
Rick almost died trying to defeat Rick Prime?!:
I need the details! I NEED THEM!
Summer and Rick’s interaction:
We haven’t gotten a lot of Summer this season so it’s nice to see her trying to reach out to her grandfather. Summer is probably the second smartest member of the Smith/Sanchez and made the connection pretty quickly that Unity was back and that Rick would be deep in his feels. I love seeing Summer’s empathetic side but it was also sad to see Rick shut her out in the guise of creating “boundaries.” He still has a long way to go.
The President becoming a hive mind in order to achieve an 100% approval rating:
Honestly, a politician enslaving the minds of his constituents in order to get unanimous approval is something that would happen in real life if they could. Absolutely realistic.
*traumatic flashback of the last 7-8 years*
David Miscavage voicemail:
Unless you are familiar with the history of Scientology, you’re probably not going to get that joke. That was written for nerds like me. (Real talk though, I believe Scientology is a dangerous cult. The actress, Leah Remini has done some great work exposing this cult for what it is and some of their abusive practices.)
My Not Favs
Has anyone seen Morty? He’s gone missing and we’re so worried about him:
I have it on good authority that he’s going to be more prominent in the season going forward. Hope my sources are correct…
Mr. Stabby:
The bit didn’t really do it for me.
The romantic arc between the President and Dr. Wong:
Fortunately it was ditched as quickly as it started.
My Thoughts:
A couple of things come to mind:
First, I want to discuss my biggest problem with Auto Erotic Assimilation as an episode. The episode ends with a pretty moving scene of Rick attempting suicide after Unity breaks up with him. Iconic scene no doubt, but a scene I felt had poor justification. The reasoning being is that the only thing we ever really learn during that episode is that Rick and Unity like to fuck…a lot. And abuse substance…a lot. Frankly, the relationship struck me as being awfully shallow. This most recent episode, however, added some much needed substance that was previously lacking. We find out that Rick has confided in them about Rick Prime and possibly Diane and Beth. They were around for the disastrous aftermath of his previous attempt to hunt Rick Prime and when they find out Rick is going to attempt to go after him again goes to extreme lengths to get Rick’s attention and dissuade him from going through with it.
Now, I don’t really want to see Unity and Rick get back together and I do see this episode as a sort of resolution to this relationship. Two people may not be able to make a romantic relationship work but sometimes that can pave the way to something better. Maybe a friendship can form from this that is much more meaningful than a romance, when they’re ready. They both still care about each other that’s for sure, but Rick still has some work.
Secondly, I’ve seen some conversation that Dr. Wong was in the wrong to side with Unity and tell Rick he was squarely in the wrong. Rewatching the episode, in the scene before Dr. Wong and Rick confront Unity the two of them discuss how they are going to convince Unity to take over the President’s hivemind in order to restore everyone. In this discussion they say,
Rick: “So you need to convince [Unity] I’m worth it.”
Dr. Wong: “You aren’t”.
Rick: “So lie”.
A possible interpretation is that Dr. Wong took his advice and said what she thought would be necessary to bring order back to earth which meant placing the blame on Rick. It’s a thought. I don’t know if if clears anything up but that’s kinda how I see it.
Overall, I enjoyed this episode. It wasn’t nearly the fun romp we had with the second episode, but I appreciate a fresh insight into Rick and Unity’s relationship and I like to see Rick gradually warming up to therapy to the point that he values his relationship with Dr. Wong. She’s one of the few people not intimidated by him or afraid to call him out on his BS. Sometimes, finding a therapist that really clicks with you can be a monumental task so Rick got pretty lucky finding the perfect therapist on the first try.
#rick and morty#rick and morty spoilers#rnm#rick and morty season 7#rick sanchez#morty smith#unity#air force wong
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Ok to start, Idk where your Tumblr has been hiding but I've been scrolling for only a few minutes now and I'm about to go buck wild from how much I love it!!!
Also as for Ani's dick I feel like yea it is big and long like "im finna make your wall dissappear" way but its not veiny. Rather its on the smooth side with a pretty pink color. Its actually a pretty cock. However i get the vibe for some reason he is self conscious about it. Either he doesn't think it's big or he just weird about it for some reason.
Either way it throws him through a loop when you somehow manage to not only get it in (mostly) but you ride him like it's your job to do so. He's so caught of guard that he cums early and you spend the next hour or so reassuring him that these things happen, that it's alright and your not mad.
(I apologize in advance for this but your blog just got my nasty side thrown into overdrive ans this is the result. I swear I'm not this bad all the time!!)
listen to me. don’t ever ever apologize for shit like this. i am depraved, nasty, disgusting. i live in the trenches. i want to hear about this stuff. all the time
im so glad u love my blog! i also love it im very proud of it :) i only started writing recently so i see why u didn’t find me til now
i agree he would have such a pretty cock. the kind you’d love to cockwarm with your mouth bcos of your oral fixation and how smooth and satisfying it is to feel the velvetiness on your tongue. you’d especially like it when it got hard enough to fuck your throat
i feel like you’d be able to take him, fit like a glove, with enough prep and the fact that you’d probably be built to fit him (good genes i guess) and THE WAY HED CUM EARLYYY omfg <33 after you tell him that it’s fine you get him hard again on purpose so you can continue where u left off
i read @ohgodmyeyes ‘s post about ani‘s dick hcs i reposted it somewhere on my blog but one hc struck me. something along the lines of “as he matured his member outgrew him, earning him odd looks in the guys shower”?? paraphrasing something along those lines. i think that’s why he’d be self conscious i loved that hc cos it felt so in character for anakin and also realistic? for that age to kinda be like 🤨
anyway adult anakin would be very pleased with your positive reaction to his substantial member
#arkainea#thanks for the msg!!#dick headcanons#indy shoots the shit#anakin#star wars#anakin skywalker smut#anakin skywalker x reader#the clone wars#tcw#sw#x y/n#x f!reader#x fem!reader#x female!reader#anakin skywalker imagine
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oops yeah please share the story I am in dire need of your webweaving
Sorry this is so late, I was struck immediately and viciously by the wrath of god (and sedatives), so needless to say i was away from my computer
anyway so . the setting is: bnha roleplay server. let me introduce our cast
we have ME, 18, playing Monoma
we have the Bakugou and Shinsou roleplayers, who are a couple also. They are also the server mods. Notably, all three of us are some kinda gay-guy-adjacent-moment
you have Snow, 19, playing Kaminari and Summer, 20-something, playing Kirishima. Snow was ace/agender/aro and summer was identifying as cis bihet
SETTING THE SCENE.
I, unaware of summer identifying unironically as like, biromantic heterosexual, had accidentally started a fight about microlabels in the discourse channel, which ended in her refusing to speak to me further on the topic because she "couldnt control herself from hurting me", which were big words from someone i was not scared of in any way, but slay.
Regardless, the server moved forward.
Kirishima was, in this setting, a gay guy. I'm pretty sure he also had lesbian moms. Summer decided to take the exciting "discovering your identity" approach, despite confiding in us that she really didn't come out until well into adulthood, but one is not limited to live experience in the world of fiction, yeah? however, i think some people should be.
anticipation builds in the ooc chat. monoma makes an off-hand comment about being gay. kirishima asks, "what's that?"
we are aghast. this continues. not only does imaginary gay kirishima not know what gay is, he doesnt know what lgbt stands for. when a comment is made that he could google it, a joke about it all being inappropriate images is dropped. the homophobia is beginning to stink. however i have promised i would not get into more fights (liar) so me and the shinsou and bakugou rpers are just like, ribbing at it a little in the ooc chat. like, "man, i wish i was this sheltered growing up, maybe i wouldnt have been bullied in school" or something to that effect, which summer takes very personally and adamantly defends her right to imagine a world where it is in any way realistic for a sixteen year old who is gay and has gay moms to be this stupid.
but nonetheless, the in character chat goes on. kirishima is still getting hooked on phonics style sexuality. and then kaminari decides to whip out a chart. which chart?
THIS. THIS THING.
needlessly to say, we were baffled. surely no one believes this is how anything works, yes?
the vilification of hypersexuality (medical symptom, often of trauma). the bizarre insistence on carefully organizing every aspect of attraction on a gradient. its such a fascinating little piece of bullfucker, but furthermore,
in a world in which the LGBT acronym is too hard for someone to grasp, im supposed to believe he just clicks with Sexuality Battleship??? I'm a professional faggot and this thing confuses me.
It was such beautiful insight into their minds. A world in which one can skip all the annoying gay people parts of sexuality labels and instead dive right into the microcosms of what was solely relevant to them. it also fantastically predicted the future homophobia i would be subject to, including a line about how "gay people had enough and wouldnt stop stealing ace rep" about the magnus archives, and also the todoroki conversion therapy moment, but this was really just a truly incredible appetizer to the full course of dumb fuckery.
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Can you PLEASE make a Taabe fic? Literally been DYING trying to find some. Someone had requested for a fic for someone else to do but they didn’t exactly make it. It’s about how Taabe is forced to attend a ceremony to win the hand of the reader, to marry even though he didn’t want to. He kept trying to mess up on purpose but ended up winning by default since the competitors were bad. And when he ended up winning, reader comes out and shoots her arrow right through his, “winning” her own hand. It’s pretty much the famous scene from the movie Brave where Merida fights for her own hand in marriage.
Hope you like it!!!
****
Request: Taabe x reader
Comanche Translations
pisuníi - skunk
tuibitsi - handsome young man
kwuuhtukatu - married (man)
patsi - older sister
petu - daughter
***
Taabe sighed irritably.
His mother chided him, “You’re our war chief. It’s your duty to compete at the marriage ceremony.”
“I don’t want to marry someone I’ve never met.” He found the whole thing distasteful.
“You don’t want to bring honor to your family? To you poor old mother?”
Naru tried to protest, but was shushed. Taabe glanced at her, happy for the support. But Mother would not be swayed in the slightest. “You will compete tomorrow, for the hand of your ally and neighbor. You’ll see that this is for the best.”
Taabe decided to stay silent. There was no point in arguing.
***
“So, you’re gonna get married, huh?” Naru said teasingly. The long walk to the ceremony had been awkwardly silent. Taabe was about to snap at her, but she continued, “You know you’re better than these other pisuníi. So, what are you gonna do about it?”
He glared at her silently.
“Lose. On purpose.”
His eyes widened.
“Obviously look like you’re trying to win. But just… lose.” Naru shrugged.
“What are the two of you talking about?”
Naru sighed. “Nothing, Mother,” Taabe said defensively.
“You’ll both be the death of me.”
Taabe grumbled. But he thought about Naru’s plan the rest of the way.
***
He was embarrassed right from the start. He had to lose to this guy? He shook his head. No matter. Naru had a good plan. He just needed the willpower to execute it. He stood to the side in the ring, pumping himself up to lose realistically.
His mother sidled up. “My tuibitsi,” she cooed, embracing him.
“It’s time,” a gruff voice sounded behind him. His mother let go as Taabe turned. He stalked into the ring, trying to look like he wanted to win.
His opponent definitely did. He glowered at Taabe. When the signal was given, they circled each other slowly. It was hand to hand combat.
His partner struck. It was a bit clumsy. Taabe side stepped it without thinking, tripping him as he did. Oops. His opponent leapt up and again charged Taabe. Taabe flipped him. He thudded into the ground. This was going terribly. Taabe backed off, waiting for the other man to get up.
The crowed jeered. His opponent came at him. Taabe let him land a couple of punches, but reflexively punched him in the chin when he took a head punch. He went down. Damn. Get up, get up.
He laid there, dazed. Damn.
***
Naru blurted out her pep talk under her breath as they walked. “Remember, you are here to lose. You are Here. To. Lose. You don’t wanna be kwuuhtukatu. So fight for that.”
Taabe nodded. He needed to get his head in the game and let go of his ego. Naru was right. He stepped up to the next task. He was up against the remaining challengers. Five other men eyed him. He sighed and let his mother fix his hair for the race.
After a final moment, they lined up. It was a straight race through the meadow and across the stream, to the old, gnarled tree. He could lose this.
The crowd cheered them as they started. Taabe took an easy but believable pace. He quickly fell into fourth place. Perfect.
He followed behind his competitors. Suddenly one of them fell. That was fine. He was still third, he thought, as he passed the man up.
The river was deeper than expected. Taabe spit water out of his mouth and swam. He lost sight of the two ahead of him. He stopped for a second on the small beach to wipe water from his eyes. Then he ran on.
As he approached the tree, Taabe looked for the other two runners. He realized the crowd was chanting his name. Oh no. He nearly slowed his pace, but he couldn’t be obvious. He ran on, hoping someone would get a burst of energy.
They didn’t. He touched the tree first, defeated, as the crowd cheered him. Damn.
***
Taabe didn’t know if it was good or bad he was going last. His other remaining competitors gripped their bows nervously. Naru scolded him, “You suck! Okay? Today you are terrible at everything you are good at!” He nodded sullenly.
The archers lined up. He took his place last. The target was extremely far. Only the best of bowsmen could hope to hit it.
The first man went. He held the bow for a long time. Too long, Taabe thought. Finally he released. It was to the right of center. The man cursed.
The second man went. He was faster, too fast. The arrow missed.
Taabe stepped up. Dammit. He stalled for a minute, then gave up and released, aiming but not to closely. The damn thing went straight and true, hitting just to the left of the target.
The crowd erupted in cheers. Taabe let his face be stone.
Something whizzed past his face. Alarmed, he stumbled back. The crowd gasped. Taabe followed their gaze. His arrow was split? He jogged out to get a better view. It was. Did this mean he lost? He actually lost?
He turned around, looking neutral. The crowd was murmuring. The elders stood in a circle, talking. Taabe looked to who had fired the arrow. A woman! He didn’t know her. She looked at him fiercely, bow still in hand.
Finally one of the elders stepped forward. “The challenge…is valid. But they must reshoot.”
Taabe walked over to the woman as the target was reset.
“Great shot, patsi.”
“Thanks,” she said cooly.
Taabe went first this time. He aimed carefully, but his heart still was not in it. The arrow hit just near the center.
The woman nearly pushed him out of the way. Releasing quickly, she split his arrow again. Impressed, he turned to her, “What’s your name?”
She smiled, but was interrupted. “My petu has won her own hand this day,” her father embraced her. Smiling more broadly, she said, “At least my erstwhile husband is handsome.”
Taabe felt himself getting hot. Naru sidled up next to him, “Second guessing your loss?”
Taabe tsked at her.
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What are some of your favorite videogames? ♡ ♡ ♡
(extremely long post incoming lol turns out i have a lot of things to say on this subject)
usually i have too hard of a time trying to remember anything i like to have answers for questions like these but thankfully for this one i have answers prepared since this is something i try to think about a lot
realistically if i had to pick one single "favorite videogame" above the rest itd probably just, like, ocarina of time & majora's mask (i'm considering them to be one videogame because i said so, it;s a package deal), just on account of how much of an impact they had on me from an early age combined with just how often i Still go back to revisit them in one way or another, but this is just about the most basic boring answer a person can have for this question unfortunately
thankfully you asked for some of my favorites instead of just one so i can unveil my Actual list of favorites instead of the one that only holds the top spot by technicality and not because i actually like it "the most". all of my favorite games have such a range in style and quality it's hard to really compare them in any meaningful way
anyway
crypt worlds, space funeral, and off-peak are all pretty different games made by very different people but i usually group them together when talking about stuff like this since collectively finding them all back in the day at roughly the same time kind of shaped my perception of indie games as a whole which probably gave me a very weird and skewed perception of the media but who gives a shit really it's a perception i hold dear. (they weren't the first indie games i ever saw of course but they were the most personally impactful ones that made me go "holy shit, this is awesome, you can do literally whatever you want")
they've pretty heavily influenced my own games, too. there have been multiple times i've started a project and then days later realized "wait shit this is just space funeral again. i'm just making space funeral again but slightly to the left. fuuuck" which is a pretty good problem to have i think.
anyway,
gadget: invention, travel, and adventure is an old point and click game i found a few years ago that struck me by just how unique feeling its atmosphere is. strange looking people turn to you and say even stranger sounding things, the soundtrack feels like its having a nervous breakdown, the main character is given so few meaningful decisions/actions (read: basically none) by the people around them that it can barely be considered a game at all…it is a very fascinating experience, and one that i think back to a lot
i like Your Turn To Die a lot and am very excited to see how it ends, though i feel like i don't have too much to say on it here. one of those games that has me going "oh man i should draw more fanart for that one of these days" every time i'm reminded of it only to then remember that i Can't Fucking Draw right now lmao
myhouse.wad is something that extremely deserves to go on this list but a large part of my brain is telling me not to just because somewhere along the line i fucked up and became allergic to anything that has ever recently become popular & trendy on youtube because i don't want to look like a poser even though literally no one but me cares about where i hear about these things so i can only bring myself to include it if i also state that i played it BEFORE it was cool &all the streamers started covering it like some kind of shameful hipster. but for real though its awesome, very inspiring stuff. i wish my brain did not force me to want to distance myself from it for literally no good reason. fucking ocarina of time is on this list why is this the thing that makes you afraid of looking like a normie
i have a lot of appreciation for myst in a kind of "i've never played more than 5 minutes of this nor have i even bothered to watch a playthrough of it but i understand what you have done for me and the games i love that came after you" kind of way. i have purchased 3 different copies of it over the years as well as a copy of riven and i don't intend on playing any of them anytime soon. great game, probably. i wouldn't know.
i like a lot of kitty horrorshow's games but i don't really know what my favorite would be. lethargy hill is probably the one i think about most often though.
i like (the steam version of) dwarf fortress a lot and have been trying to play it more often. it is very funny having 80 hours in a game and still not feeling like you understand half the mechanics in it. figuring it out as i go along has been fun though. in a similar vein i also like elden ring a lot and despite being at over 160 hours on that one i still haven't beaten it. i need to get back to it before the dlc comes out but i stopped playing for so long that most of my muscle memory is gone…
for something much more recent than all of the above, absolutely perfect specimen is something really incredible that gave me a lot of stuff to think about, though it can be a little hard to recommend since it's extremely 18+ and has a whole big list of content warnings you definitely need to take heed of. extremely interesting work though, i like it a lot.
i'm running out of things to list off and should probably stop just for the sake of time even if there is more shit that deserves mentioning so i'll just end it off with CLONE ON NET YAROZE BABYYYYYY LET'S FUCKIN GO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💯💪🙌💥💯💯
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I love Sentinels of the Multiverse. For those unaware, it is a cooperative card game where you play as a team of heroes against a villain who "pilots themself". It's set in the fictional comic universe (as in comics are fictional, and the existence of these comics is also largely fictional, you know, a meta fiction scenario) of Sentinel Comics which comes complete with all the comic book tropes and story lines you can find in Marvel and DC.
They have amazing character concepts, each with their unique approach to playing the game. I love everything about it.
They ended with a major multiverse threatening story line before calling that the end of the card game. Then, a few years back they announced that they would be re-releasing the game with some streamlined rules and updated illustrations. Okay, cool. I can get behind that.
The first set released, not significantly different than how the original game played, but there are a few less ambiguities. That's always nice. Then they announced the first expansion for the definitive edition. This time with a new hero and new villains. I wasn't thrilled that they were adding new content when there was no indication this would be anything but a remaster of the original game, but it was also exciting that we would be getting new content for a game that I believed had ended. So a bit of a wash on that one and the excitement for new stuff won out for me.
Now we are in the waiting phase of the second expansion. This one also brings with it a new hero (hero pair to be precise) and new villains. There was something that seemed off to me during the fundraising campaign and then as time went and I couldn't shake that feeling I kept looking at the card and art previews they had given us. That's when it struck me. What was bothering me was in the art. The game has art that pays homage to the general style of comics through time, but what I would describe as the "modern comic" art is where I continue to dwell and think about it. That particular style of art is doing what I can only describe as "homogenizing".
There are two particular characters where this really stands out to me. The first of which is Parse. Here is what she looked like in the original printing of the game.
I like her design, I think she looks super cool! Then in her alt art you can see she's a bit on the fatter side (by comic standards anyway, she realistically just has human proportions there). That's cool to see in a riff on the comic genre. Take some things that aren't seen as much and bring them front and center! I love that.
Then there is her new art for the definitive edition.
I feel like her costume really just became "skintight female hero outfit". I think it really detracts from the character of her original costume. I also think she looks on the skinnier side, but the same could be said of her first art from the original game.
Then there is the villain character, Apostate.
He's grizzled, he's buff. He looks like you're in for a bad time fighting him.
Then updated:
What happened to his wrinkles? What happened to his extreme widows peak? The defining features of his face are gone and replaced with a younger, prettier man. This somehow makes him less sexy. My understanding is it's to display he's more about scheming than kicking your ass directly, but I also can't over the look he's giving the viewer. Now he looks like you would have a bad time fighting off the invitations to the bedroom he's trying to get you into.
These are just the examples that irk me the most. There seems to be a general trend in the game's art that leans into these young, pretty, triangular sexless men and these skin-tight suited, buxom, skinny ladies. It's homogenizing to the worst form of comic art. A style I would describe as "Liefeld-esque" It bugs me that all the character in the designs is being taken out and replaced with such generic "comic art".
Anyway, just keep thinking about that and wanted to send it to the void.
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hi!! im absolutely astounded at the amount of depth and heart thats in all your fics, and im also very floored at the amount at which you write—im at a cross between admiration and maybe jealously lol!! I wanted to ask, are there any fic of yours (sandman or not) that you think are underrated/deserves more attention?? super excited for everything you ever write!!
asdfg anon thank you <3 So I have a Problem where I have a lot of anxiety about what I create, and when that's writing, if I am not writing The Next Great Novel, then I need to sate the brain demons SOMEHOW, and writing a LOT is the easiest way to do that. I want very badly to please people, and fortunately it's not a hardship for me to write the amount that i do, though I AM trying to consciously like. Take breaks if I need? Take a night off? Keep it healthy looool. But that I'm able to write things that people are consistently finding value and meaning in is a continuous and beautiful marvel to me so thank you, thank you very much!!!
So I read your second part of the ask wrong at first and had gathered uh several fics which I think are underrated that are NOT mine
One Half of a Whole by @violetequus8 - Absolutely REMARKABLE post-apocalyptic literature. Equus captures an entire world and history in 4000 words. There are sentences in this fic that rewrote my brain chemistry.
The entire like this slumber that creeps to me series by @tobrokenstone - THIS. This is survival the way I fucking LOVE IT. Bleak, stark, hard decisions, lasting consequences, surprisingly tender cannibalism (this last may be...specific to me and a few select others lol)
Once again repping the point-set-triangulation series by therm0dynamics, which is singlehandedly the series that got me into Hob/The Corinthian (it's about MIRRORS it's about PARALLELS)
And at this point I realized that you'd asked about which of MY fics I think are underrated, and I was just so caught up in the thought of repping my friends that I lived in a world where I did not write for a moment loool
Salt and Rye is the result of a prompt on tumblr. I wanted to try and capture that feeling of recreating a parent or grandparent's recipe and failing, because it's SUCH a disheartening moment, but I wanted to make it lighter, because Hob has someone there to share the comedy of it with him.
Here there be dragons is my latest fic in the Siren AU and I do think that people who aren't into scifi in general will be more likely to give it a pass, but I'm very proud of it, and very proud of the emotions it evoked in ME, and I promise it's not hard scifi like The Martian or even really pervasive scifi like Star Trek! I just tried to think realistically about what our planet would look like and feel like in 1500 years, and how we might need to leave it. Also, Dream's still a carnivorous octopus man.
an act of faith is the vampire fever dream that struck me at like 3pm on a Saturday and I blacked out for like two hours and this was what I'd written during that time. I enjoy writing obscene levels of devotion and you can't really get much more obscene than "willing to tempt death year after year even though no one's asked you to in order to prove to YOURSELF that your lover loves you"
Honestly I don't think many of my fics are underrated! They're all written at different points in my development and my understanding of myself as a writer, and they range pretty widely in terms of theme and genre sometimes, so some, statistically, are going to be kind of niche! And that's okay! I guess the only thing I'd say is that even if you think something isn't your jam, unless the tags are specifically triggering you give it a try! The worst thing that'll happen is you get a paragraph in and then back out again. An extremely smart person (it was @xx-vergil-xx <3) recently said something along the lines that part of healthy interacting with art is also knowing when to put it down, but it's also important to give different things a chance so that you learn more about yourself and your preferences. I myself am trying to expose myself to and write more angst? Because it makes me deeply uncomfortable to do so! But that's a valuable feeling to know and recognize! Idk i just think we all get different stuff out of writing and it's just nice that I've been able to provide something to so many people <3
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I watched 1x03 last night, and the thing that struck me this time around was Iris's boyfriend Dustin. Did he know that Carlos was married to Iris? (Of course, judging solely by this episode, it appears that Carlos didn't know Carlos was married to Iris, but I'm trying to look past that 😂) If Dustin didn't know about the marriage while he and Iris were together, it's likely he would have been made aware of it after her disappearance. Both Dustin and Carlos would certainly have been questioned by the police about her disappearance, and I'd think the fact that his girlfriend was married to someone else would have been a pertinent line of inquiry while interrogating Dustin.
This episode also makes me wonder what Carlos thought of Dustin. From what we see in the episode, Carlos seems pretty indifferent. He doesn't appear to think it likely that Dustin was involved in Iris's disappearance, even though Michelle has been convinced for years that Dustin probably murdered her. We're told that Michelle never liked Dustin and she thought he treated Iris badly. Judging by her actions when it comes to Iris, I'm not sure whether to trust Michelle's judgment on this. Does Carlos have an opinion about it? (I mean, I think the real answer is "no, because the writers definitely weren't writing season 1 with the Carlos/Iris marriage in mind" but again, I'm trying to look past that!)
It's possible that Carlos just didn't know Dustin at all, since this episode also particularly emphasizes that Carlos and Iris must have been completely estranged for a while before Iris disappeared. I'm not sure if the show necessarily intended this, but it's the only way a lot of things from season 1 can possibly make sense. As Michelle starts to find out details about the blue truck and the people Iris was hanging around with before her disappearance, she's relaying this information to Carlos and he's advising her on how to proceed. If Carlos had ANY contact with Iris whatsoever in the months prior to her disappearance, Michelle would obviously be grilling Carlos about this stuff, yet whenever we see them discuss it, neither of them act like it's information that Carlos would have even a chance of knowing. Michelle was desperate for information, so the fact that she didn't question Carlos means she must have known that there was no possible way that Carlos had any information about what Iris had been doing and who she had been spending time with.
I actually think the idea of Carlos and Iris being estranged for a while before her disappearance makes Carlos's failure to contact Iris after she was found make more sense. If they had some kind of falling out that upset Iris, or maybe if the last thing Iris said to him before disappearing was that she didn't want contact with him, I could see Carlos being afraid that his reappearance in her life could be upsetting to Iris. We know Carlos must have had at least some contact with Michelle once Iris was found because of the whole Iris using Carlos's health insurance thing, so my head canon is that Michelle came to Carlos and asked about the insurance and also discouraged Carlos from seeing Iris right then and to give her some time for recovery and readjustment before contacting her. I don't think Michelle would intend for Carlos to never see Iris, but I think that could have been a realistic outcome. If that had happened, I really can see Carlos wanting to contact Iris but letting guilt and fear of setting back Iris's progress keep him from doing so until he absolutely had to--when he needed a divorce.
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Anaylzing TOWW dialogue.
Part#1
This will also include unused dialogue because there isn't enough characterization of him without it.
Come closer. Fear not, for though you are already dead, I still have need of you.
It appears TOWW is trying to comfort the lamb or is at least concerned that the lamb would be scared of him. Too scared to make a deal, maybe? This could just be a line he's rehearsed over the course of his imprisonment. No real emotion behind it I mean.
Those foolish Bishops thought they could keep you from me in death. But instead they sent you straight to me.
How are the Bishops keeping souls from literal Death? Is this why they have so many skeletons in their realms? Is this why Heket has animated skeletons in her dungeon. The souls cannot pass on to TOWW because of something the bishops are doing?
I think Shamura knew what they were doing, when the lamb was sacrificed in a way that sent the soul directly to TOWW. the other Bishops only acted on their commands, they would not have known that this would happen. Does TOWW not think it's suspicious that of all the souls that are kept from him by the bishops, his prophesied savior is sent right to him? Maybe he didn't care. Maybe Shamura was tired of trying to placate him, knowing they could not realistically keep Death imprisoned forever. It was time to put an end to this and the Bishops.
I will give you LIFE again, but at a PRICE!
All I ask is for you to start a Cult in my name. Do we have a deal?
Can TOWW just resurrect folks, without needing bones and such like the lamb. Although I'm pretty sure the place where he is trapped is full of bones. It maybe a different ritual all together considering he gives us the red crown too.
It's funny how the price of the lamb's life was paid mostly by TOWW in the form of giving them the red crown. I say this because TOWW already had Ratau ready to mentor the Lamb on starting a cult. Does he give the red crown to anyone that manages to reach him? What does he look for in his vessels?
(After Lamb dies)
Fear not, for you are my chosen vessel and death cannot halt you.
I shall not allow it, for I still have need of you.
Now, I'm sure he's just saying that out of habit. Isn't it interesting that TOWW refers to the concept of death as separate from himself? He says "I shall not allow it", he may not be death, but he can control it. The same way his siblings control, chaos, famine, pestilence, and war, but are not those concepts.
Take what you have gathered. Build and strengthen the Cult. This is how power is gained.
What does he mean "This is how power is gained"? For most people death is permanent, earthly gains are left behind. Being an immortal god of death has warped TOWW's perception of the mortal death would it seem.
Continue on, undaunted. Each time you are brought down, you rise again stronger.
I personally don't feel any stronger after dying in-game. Is TOWW....reassuring the lamb after they die? As in, motivating them to keep trying even when they fail? It makes sense, you wouldn't want your vessel to become too disheartened to continue serving you.
Death is of little consequence. Rise once more, vessel of mine.
It matters not how many times you are struck down. The Cult shall continue to grow.
I know it meant to come across as possesive but being referred to as "vessel of mine" gives me butterflies.
Given how self-centered TOWW comes across to be, it's curious that he puts great importance of the cult surviving. Makes sense as, cults and followers are an easy way to amass power and resources in this world. It is a wonder that he allowed Ratau to live after letting his previous cult to fall to ruin.
To be continued...
#cult of the lamb#cotl#my post#cotl toww#cotl narinder#just me over-analyzing things#feel free to respond#i'd love to hear other people's interpretation of TOWWs lines
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