#( and would absolutely kill everyone on the planet / universe if anything happened to them and then maybe himself. )
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“See! There it is again! It is going to attack us, we must act immediately!”
Keith wonders how badly it will make everything worse if he feigns a heart attack. He thinks he could be pretty convincing.
“Animals make noises,” Keith says tiredly. “The roars are not getting any closer. How did the previous attacks go? Was there some sort of roar-increase?”
The dignitary hesitates. “Well, no. The first time it happened the beast seemed startled, and then it was angry.”
“Shocking, that,” Lance says, and this time no one fights him.
The longer this debate has been going on, the clearer and clever it has become that Lance was correct.
Before they decided to go after the beast, the team decided it would be best to get as much information from the dignitary, security team, and royal family of the planet as possible. They expected it would take maybe half a varga to go over a couple reports, make a plan, and go after the beast – and hopefully manage to subdue it rather than kill it, to solve the problem on as many fronts and please as many people as possible.
Of course, because the universe finds their endless struggle amusing, it did not go that way. Instead, they’ve been here for the past four vargas at least, trying to get as much information as possible from the scattered reports and eye-witness accounts they could gather, all while half-watching Lance in tense silence (who, to be fair, has mostly stayed in one place and ignored everyone except for making the occasional bitchy comment).
They are getting nowhere.
It turns out the royal family and many community leaders are not nearly as fond as the dignitary and the soldiers of killing the beast. No one can agree on anything, not a plan of attack, not a plan to avoid attack, nothing. Keith has been listening to the same circular arguments ever since he got here, and as the not-black-paladin, he’s expected to contribute, so he has to pay attention. And usually that’s tolerable – it’s not the first time he’s expected to participate in a meeting that has gone on forever and done nothing productive, nor will it be the last – because he’s got Lance next to him, with a running commentary and joke stream that makes the whole thing easier to bear, along with a steady hand on his arm when he gets mad and often even a solution to wrap the whole thing up.
But, obviously, Lance is furious with him and everyone, right now, and is sitting as far away from Keith as he can manage, doodling on his holopad.
It’s miserable.
“I simply feel like there are more options that we should consider,” someone says diplomatically. Since that is literally the ninth time that exact sentence in that exact tone has been said in this meeting, Keith does not get his hopes up. He’s honestly half prepared to die and be buried in this stupid meeting room.
As the room descends into arguing once again, with absolutely zero new conclusions or changes, Keith finally gives up on paying any further attention. There’s nothing he’s missing, there’s nothing he’s contributing, and, he will admit it, doing meetings without Lance on his team is genuinely more than he can handle. He has no idea when he reached this level of codependency – because he can distinctly recall a point in time where doing meetings with Lance so much as in the same room would have them at each other’s throats in seconds – but he is in no place to handle it now. He lets himself drift, staring out the window across the table from him and deliberately thinking of anything except the flash of hurt in Lance’s eyes before it settled into fury, last night during the call.
As he observes the pretty scenery in front of him, rolling hills of yellow grass and an off-blue sky, he notices something strange along the backdrop of a pretty countryside. Along the edge of the far-off forest, there is a dark spot, out of place from its surroundings. He squints his eyes, leaning forward to try and figure out what it is. His posture piques the curiosity of the others at the table, and soon everyone is looking at the spot, watching with growing concern as it seems to get bigger, significantly bigger, and starts even to take shape.
“It has come again,” the dignitary says, hushed. They have genuine fear reflected in their eyes, which softens Keith slightly towards them. Maybe they aren’t just being a stubborn dick.
It takes a second to process, but soon the room descends into chaos, because for all that they have been discussing for hours, no plans have been made. Time is up, though. The beast as come to them, and now they must plan on the fly.
“Ready the guards,” says the queen. “Be vigilant and prepared. I would have appreciated more time, but there is none. We must be prepared to protect ourselves and our people. Last time we managed to scare it off with –”
“Wait!” Pidge shouts, the only one still sitting and facing the window. There is command in her voice, the likes Keith rarely hears from her, and her fingers twitch like they do when she’s calculating something in her head, solving a problem none of them even considered. “Nobody move!”
All the gathered officials in the room stand in tense silence, half watching Pidge and half watching the rapidly approaching beast. As it gets closer, it becomes apparent that it’s not approaching on its own. The beast, which Keith can now see resembles a truly gigantic bear, has a carefully bandaged leg, more than is capable for an animal, and is guided forward but someone sitting on its back, tiny in comparison to its head but visibly determined from even this distance.
“I knew it!” Pidge crows, springing up from her seat and pointing at Lance with manic glee in her eyes. “I fucking knew it! Your posture is way too good!”
Lance stares at her for several moments, eyebrow raised, and then sighs. Keith watches with a dropped jaw as he grows several inches taller, as his hair gets redder and his face gets bushier, until Coran sits in the place where Lance just was.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake,” Shiro mutters, dragging his hand down his face. “I’m going back to the astral plane.”
Coran shrugs. “Lance’s plan simply had more research and direction. Also, I’ve not been out on a mission in too long. I will admit that played a role in my decision.”
“Well, Jesus, Coran, do you think we maybe could have –”
“Hey, guys, not to interrupt, but the giant beast is getting closer, people are aiming fire at it, and my dumbass best friend is currently riding on its back, so,” Hunk says. “Can we maybe worry about that first?”
The seriousness of the situation hits them all pretty quickly, and they adjust their attitudes accordingly. Lance is approaching faster by the second, no longer a shadow in the distance but a distinct figure, waving his hands like a dumbass and either completely oblivious or completely apathetic to the myriad of weapons, poised to fire, pointed in his direction by a horde of soldiers. The team rush outside with the rest of the officials, calling out for people to hold their fire, although it doesn’t do much, and the great beast swerves several times to avoid getting blasted.
“Stop! Stop! Don’t shoot! That’s a paladin!”
“Fire away!” the dignitary shouts over them, fury lighting their features and stubborn set to their jaw. “The insolence of their paladin does not negate the risk the beast poses!”
The paladins and the dignitary, along with several others on their side, glare at each other. The team may not approve of Lance’s methods, and there will be some serious discussion later, but that doesn’t change the fact that their fucking friend is out there being shot at, and they’re not going to stand back and let it happen.
“I swear, if you hurt him –”
“If he wasn’t trying to be hurt he shouldn’t have –”
“Hold on!” Lance shouts, finally close enough to hear. “Everyone – cool it for a sec! Hold on!”
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next
#one part left i think!!!#whooo!!!#vld#voltron#keith#keith kogane#lance#lance mcclain#klance#pre klance#team as family#lance is a disney princess#lance is good with animals#complicated situations#keith is a good leader#or at least he’s trying to be#my writing#longpost
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Why not move? I’d never stay in a country that treats its women this way. And you working for the government indirectly supports that. Good luck.
Okay so
i've been mulling over this ever since it came to my inbox and i've been trying to find a way to answer this and NOT be impolite or improper because i am aware that not everyone knows the complications of straight up moving to a different country, as it is not as simple as just moving to a different STATE, like the US, [and to be fair i've heard that even THAT could be stressful] and as someone who has LIVED in 3 countries and has visited another 5+ countries, let me tell you that your question is extremely ignorant and insensitive and straight up hurtful to all the people who both DONT want to leave their communities here and also the people who DO want to leave but are too poor to do so.... because our country, due to the prohibition by good ol' murica has now the lowest money currency value on the PLANET, and we have been suffering in silence for DECADES- with NO way to transfer money into our country- [donation campaigns are usually a scam, pay attention to those please] so in short? we are poor as absolute FUCK-!
and the process of moving somewhere else is already hard enough for people who DONT have as much financial issues, let alone US.
what exactly would anyone propose we do? when we dont have the money to request for any sort of visa, nor to get a house in a different country, nor food, nor for studying, living, getting medical or MENTAL health help- etc etc etc???
and reports of smuggling people out of the country usually come back as human trafficking or the gov blew them up or killed them somehow? idk this has actually happened with a PLANE once-
the only way to leave this country is being filthy rich, fucking LUCKY, or just a very very VERY smart student which again more often than not requires both money AND luck to get accepted in any university... so again.... no money!!!
like im sorry for snapping but here i am being told "why don't you leave" as if i haven't tried to find a way all my life, as if its some sort of sick joke- i cant, i fucking CANT!- i have family members i care about and wouldn't want to leave- other countries treat us like garbage thanks to online media portraying us as monsters- i cant spend another 10 years to study shit all over again just to send a letter to foreign universities with barely enough luck because im NOT that smart at all!! and it reminds me of when i look at my dad and say i wish we lived somewhere else and he looks at me like "then leave" in the cruelest way imaginable because he KNOWS we cant fucking leave due to him being a diplomat-
every country has its own culture and history and communities that they value and want to protect and stand by, so people cant just LEAVE, and even if they do, more often than not, other places would never accept them or appreciate them the same way their own country would. Like did yall tell black people to leave america after the BLM movement when George Floyd got killed? this is our home and we need to stop saying "then leave" and start saying "we need to start fixing this shit"
we are so fucking tired. please stop saying "then leave" if you just "don't want to help"...
as for me working for the gov, my dad is already a diplomat and keeps me away from doing anything against the regime, and also i'm considered one of the LUCKY ones in my country, who has a job that ensures a constant pay since the first semester of UNIVERSITY. im one of the few that could actually have a meal at night without worrying about what i'm going to eat tomorrow, and at the same time i teach kids from the inside to not take shit from the gov. i consider myself VERY lucky.
we aren't playing a videogame to take shallow black and white SIDES- even the protesters have destroyed privet properties and peoples cars and etc etc, and some people straight up want the monarchy system back as if that very system wasn't the entire reason that half of our countries riches and history isn't in the BRITISH museum today instead of their homeland!! this shit started over the freedom to WEAR what we want not to HURT everyone in blind rage!!!
Please never say "just leave" to anyone else ever again, especially to someone who doesn't even know if they'll live another day stepping out of the door, let alone drive all the way to an airport or the country boarders or something.... if they even HAVE the money to go that far.
So thankyou for reading and being concerned in your own way but id rather stay here and die in a country that doesn't accept me as a WOMAN than to live a futureless life in a country that wouldn't even accept me as a PERSON.
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Chapter 14 of Harrow the Ninth
So Harrow's rooms were intended for Anastasia, but for some reason she never used them. I guess maybe she died before the Lyctors began living on the Mithraeum? Only, if the rooms were intended for her in the first place, they had to pre-date her death. Maybe, since she isn't listed as a saint, she died rather than actually become a Lyctor? Maybe she did do what Cytherea pointed out they all could have done and just... didn't do it? She and her cavalier could have both lived out their natural lives as regular people and they'd still both be very dead by this point in time, so that wouldn't change them being crossed out in the Dramatis Personae. Does Harrow know what happened to Anastasia and just isn't telling us for some reason?
The idea of Harrow wandering around the Mithraeum like a malnourished gremlin and eating raw vegetables out of the refrigerator rather than learning how to cook is so funny to me. I mean, I feel that, I struggle a lot with cooking, but I tend to fall back on frozen tamales and pasta myself. I wonder if microwaves still exist in the Locked Tomb universe, they are a godsend for the cooking-challenged
The things that John says about Blood of Eden do not make much sense and sound like some kind of weird propaganda. It's like how some people talk about Antifa: "they claim to be a grassroots movement, but they're obviously backed by a nefarious organization", "every time someone hurts or attacks me or something I like, it's gotta be Antifa", "even though this person had an actually very understandable reason for attacking me which is not in any way my fault by the way, they obviously only did so because they were working with Antifa even though it makes absolutely no sense whatsoever that Antifa would work with them"
Also, they were encountered five thousand years ago, but they already know all about the Nine Houses without John supposedly having had any idea about them prior to that, but somehow BOE was just searching every corner of space for five thousand years looking for these people that it already knew all about? I think there is more to this story. Like I don't know, were these descendants of people who witnessed John's resurrection and didn't like it and then they all jumped in a wormhole or something and got lost in space for five thousand years? Like I'm thinking about that other human empire in Stellaris except maybe the other way around in terms of which one winds up being fascist. Mercy did at some point mention that wormholes exist in this universe, I think
So this is something I don't quite get. I thought the danger in John going back to the Nine Houses was that the Resurrection Beasts could come there and destroy the Nine Houses, I don't think there's been anything so far that indicates that the Nine Houses is more likely to attract Resurrection Beasts than anywhere else. And also, I've read ahead a bit through Chapter 16 and I think it's incorrect that the Resurrection Beasts would do anything at all to the Nine Houses, because they only feed on thalergenic planets, and there aren't any of those left in the Nine Houses, and they don't harm people who haven't committed the indelible sin, which should be everyone in the Nine Houses who isn't a Lyctor, and they aren't traveling boldily through space or anything, so it's not like it's an issue of "Earth is literally under siege by planet fucking Jupiter" either. So what is the actual danger, here? Why would leading John back the Nine Houses make him easier to kill?
Patiently awaiting the day when Harrow learns how to blow on hot food
Very curious how John knows that Harrow's parents are dead and when he learned of this. The letter that invited her to the Lyctor trial, which he supposedly wrote, was addressed to them, for example
So being able to survive that much thanergy is just a matter of genetics?
So I think this raises the question of what is resurrection, exactly? I guess from this discussion, it would be "causing a living thing to survive a massive influx of thanergy" where "massive influx of thanergy" is probably just a very technical term for "death". But if the thanergy from 200 children dying would ordinarily have killed the ovum, wouldn't it have also ordinarily have killed the actual living adults on the Ninth as well? It doesn't really make sense that deaths would trigger a lot of death energy that then by itself kills more people just from the death energy
Please, it's fine when Gideon does the whole Space Jesus thing, because Gideon is cool and actually really means it, but when you affect the Space Jesus motifs it feels cringey and fake
Also, that's some impressive mental arithmetic, because Harrow didn't say "two hundred" anywhere in this conversation and you've been actively talking to each other this whole time
Well, you told Gideon. I wonder what Harrow's false history is now for how her parents found out about her opening the Tomb, by the way
I assume that John is eventually going to find out about Harrow opening the Tomb, and I'm very interested to see what happens after that
And here is another segment where we have Harrow talking to John, and then a fast forward with no break to Harrow in bed that night, and then back to Harrow talking with John again
I think in this context, the thing that it would make most sense for Eden to be, in the sense of the biblical paradise lost, etc., is Earth before whatever happened that killed all the planets and resulted in the Resurrection, which lends support to the "people who were around to witness the Resurrection and didn't like it" idea. And if they fucked off somewhere with a wormhole, maybe John counts that as "leaving Earth to die". John calls Eden "someone", but planets have souls, so maybe they are someones. And according to John, BOE considers themselves to "own" Eden/Earth. So is this just a fight over who gets to live there?
I wonder if the last sentence is supposed to make us think about Harrow turning her back on Gideon by erasing her memories of her, or just as foreshadowing that Harrow is eventually going to start questioning all this stuff that she's been told about BOE. I don't like this as a metaphor for Harrow and Gideon, because I don't like the idea of people having "the right to act as though [they] own" each other, but I dunno
"How sharper than the serpent's tooth" is apparently from King Lear, and is King Lear complaining that his daughters are ungrateful. Is he saying that BOE were ungrateful to Eden? That, I guess, they took the Earth for granted? Has there ever been a single human in the whole history of the planet who hasn't taken the Earth for granted to a certain extent, honestly? Does John fancy himself above this?
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I would absolutely read that ffxiv x svsss fic if you ever did it! I love the world building you so would love to what would when you smack them together!
I don't have anything really defined as far as ideas go, but dropping someone on QCMS for a while would be really funny I think because like
Compared to whatever is the norm in the SVSSS verse, people on Etheirys (the world ffxiv is set in) are practically made of qi. Or have so much of it anyway that they might as well be made of it.
Which, as far as I can tell, is extremely not normal in a cultivation setting. Even the Garleans are made like that, they just can't control the energy. Imagine a person with more qi than some cultivators ever amass in their entire life who at the same time can't even circulate it. They are capable of manipulating it in other objects to a degree, but their own boundless qi? Completely inaccessible to them.
Also just asking anyone to talk about where they come from would be a trip. "One of our moons fell, the dragon imprisoned in it got out and wrecked shit, caused wide-spread environmental destruction and now one of our city states is stuck in permanent winter and this is just a thing that happens every now and then" would be wild to listen to for someone who is not used to the concept of Calamities.
Or take "well we don't actually know if our gods even really exist or not in the form we worship them, because when we try too hard to commune with them all we get are fakes that enslave the minds of people and drain the land dry".
Lots of very wild concepts in ffxiv that would make MQF think that he must be having a qi-deviation or a fever dream, because there's no way this person (demon??? most races would get mistaken for one. oh god can you imagine an Au Ra or a hroth or god forbid a lala getting dropped in there) is actually saying all these things with their full chest in complete sincerity. You don't even need to bring the WoL ("Hi, so my dayjob is to fight and kill fake gods?"), basically anyone would cause A Stir.
Like, the opposite of it would be less funny I think, because whatever a cultivator can say would probably go the way of "huh, there sure are some strange things in those far eastern lands" because you need to go very far to hit the threshold where things start sounding a little implausible for a better traveled person in the ffxiv universe. And even then if you get someone who's fully informed they might just break out the "have you considered you that might hail from another planet altogether?" and yeah no, that's not better at all.
A cultivator might get sick from all the aether all around too - it's Lingxi caves turned up to a hundred, in everything and everyone, without any filter on the energy. And as of Endwalker, we have Dynamis, which is a force that acts in the absence of aether and reacts very strongly to emotion...
#shut up tc#I wouldn't bring my WoL because my WoL is an OP bastard even in setting#but Percy could kick LBH's ass almost effortlessly protag halo or not#I will say this much
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"The Waters of Mars" thoughts
hey y'all it's been a minute. i'm going to knuckle through the last few eps of the davies era before i leave the country. anyway this one was good
this feels like the clearest throughline so far from s4. the doctor is experiencing the same emotions as many a greek protagonist– he has been touched by fate and destiny so profoundly, so inarguably, that he lashes out powerlessly. some of this is a reaction to being alone, deeply alone, having lost all the friends he has made since the time war ended, but some of it is about HOW he lost them. he was destined to meet donna, travel with her, he was actually a pawn in HER destiny, her journey. "journey's end" that was HER journey, he was HER companion in a sense. for someone so accustomed to having the upper hand, especially someone like ten, i can imagine how bad that shook him
cause like, this is ten, you know? i remember nine's last story, i remember "a coward, any day." i remember how he chose suicide, not because it would destroy the daleks but bc it meant he didn't have to live to see them kill everyone. coward, absolutely. the time lord victorious is the polar opposite. time lord victorious is glorious, violent arrogance. what was the change? what happened in the meantime? a lot, but primarily, rose tyler. rose-badwolf forced the regeneration, ten absorbed some of her into him, and time lord victorious is PURE rose tyler. her audacity, her confidence, her arrogance, all wrapped up with a fragile doctor who has lost all and has suddenly realized there are no rules, no rulemakers
the doctor has always been the "teenage rebel" but that implies youth, obedience, an authority figure to defy. it implies a kind of harmless messiness. but that authority figure is gone, before the war he was a father and a grandfather and now he is neither, he is an orphan, he is a widower, he is the very last of the time lords and he is completely lost as a rebel in a universe that suddenly has given him nothing to rebel against
i'm not going to recap the episode. go watch it if you don't remember it, it's really good. a few points: "name, rank, and intention" "the doctor, doctor, and... fun" that's a good one. adelaide was born in 1999 which makes sense for this being 2059 but hello??? adelaide brooke is gen z?? it's 2024 is she on tik tok rn?? girl. so the doctor notes that they have the first flower to bloom on mars in 10,000 years, not sure if that's referencing anything. we get several ice warriors mentions tho, respect
this whole episode has kind of a "the thing" vibe, i like it. viral life form in the glacier, can't tell who's infected. wish this episode had a fucked up dog. uniquely this episode has ten trying to leave, repeatedly. it was pretty common in classic who for the doctor to land somewhere randomly and then go "hm. i don't care much for this. goodbye" and be thwarted, cause he was messy back then. nowadays tho he's not like that, this is unique, this is notable. he finally admits it's a fixed point, a thing i think means nothing except whatever any particular episode writer wants it to mean. which is fine, this is doctor who after all. he takes it back at the end, decides he's above the law bc there are no lawmakers anymore, but forgets that other people have agency. adelaide killing herself got a gasp from my bf
a bit of the "bad wolf" theme plays during the time lord victorious speech which proves my point imo. this is rose, this is rose's influence. she did this, she made him this way, and i don't think that's even a bad thing! in so many ways she made him better. but she also took this fragile war-torn survivor of genocide and made him angry, hard, fanatically right about everything. we also got a bit of "vale decem" at the end around adelaide's suicide cause like yeah this is very distinctly leading to his death
i know this has been extremely rambly but i truly think this episode (which is mostly "the impossible planet" meets "the thing" until the last 15 minutes) is deeply rich thematically and ties into threads i've been picking up on since "the parting of the ways" like ten's era has SO MUCH going on in it!! it's a commentary on nine, on rose, on the time war, on destiny, on classic who, on new who's forward direction. and it'll lead so elegantly into eleven's era, who lives in extreme opposition to having once been ten (as is pointed out directly in "day of the doctor") i think we lose the plot a bit after that. but that's quite a ways away in my recapping. anyway this story is really good and this era is so rich
also this episode was in memory of barry letts. pour one out
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i think one of the biggest reasons i refuse to take anything LL presents to me in good faith morality-wise is that just, everything about the vatborn--completely leaving aside the trueborn or mogadorians as a whole--is a hundred percent on par with what happened to lorien for sheer scale and depth of tragedy and horror. in very different ways, yes--apples to oranges, i'm not going to say one is worse--but on par.
and not only do neither the heroes or the narrative ever acknowledge this. they act like it's a good thing.
[cw: genocide, war crimes, racism, fascism, slavery, torture, child abuse, dehumanization, apologia for all of it after the cut. basically, the usual lmao]
or at least, a totally neutral and casual one (although they will still never call it what it is by name). the vatborn, who are universally abused, beaten, tortured, brainwashed child soldiers and actual fucking chattel slaves, aren't people. they are subhuman. their suffering doesn't matter. they can't be rehabilitated for any kind of peaceful life. they are barely more than mindless animals. they are vermin to be disposed of without a thought, while their actual slavers get far more mercy, compassion, and humanization than they do (which holy shit is saying something).
the only, ONLY person in the entire series who thinks it matters that they're people; that it's fucked up to have been taught that killing them in front of him as a small child was unremarkable; who feels uncomfortable with ordering them around and is worried about getting one of them in trouble; who questions the ideology he grew up in that said otherwise; is a deluded, naive, easily-manipulated, selfish race traitor who is treated with rabid murderous hatred for it for the rest of his life.
they and their culture--yes, culture, we see that they have developed some of their own under the trueborns' noses--are eradicated from existence because they 'didn't know any better,' and no one bats an eyelash before or after. it's fine because without their extinction they'd eradicate everyone else. and the method of their creation, both knowledge and resources, is lost.
there will never be another living vatborn again.
all of this is true, say the writers. all of this is fine. and to that i say: does any of that rhetoric sound familiar?
like. honestly, there are some REALLY strong foils and parallels to be made between the loric and the vatborn, right down to the scars versus the tattoos:
(which, of course, no one has jack shit to say about. in the slightest. then or ever. 🙃)
what they should have done--and i don't mean 'here's a way they might have handled it,' i mean the only thing they could have done, period--to make any of the protagonists actually decent people would have been to make them have a massive group-wide crisis the INSTANT they found out what the vatborn are. that should have been one of THE central conflicts in the series from that point forward. 'we are having to slaughter child soldier slaves, who have no choice in the matter, en masse in self-defense. we have no idea how to make it stop without letting ourselves be overrun. we have been doing this for a long time and we never even knew. fuck. jesus fuck' should absolutely fucking haunt a good majority of your protagonists, even if it takes until after the war when survival mode disengages for it to hit, or else you have a cast full of just plain evil cunts and i am not going to root for them no matter how many planets they save. fuck that.
like. for all the writers and characters hammer on about how ~we're not like them uwu,~ they ARE. the perspective we're meant to sympathize with IS the mogadorians, just reskinned with craft-beer-and-brick-pizza-ovens-appreciate-nature-uwu neoliberal fascism instead of ham-handed right-wing stereotypes.
(which, the 'respect for the planet and nature' thing? bullshit. the entity colonizes and terraforms the ENTIRE EARTH. it does this without asking a single ass human if they're okay with it; marina even points this out, which is immediately dismissed lol. the entity destroys pretty much the entire fossil record of the earth, all the way down. the writers don't give a fuck about respecting or preserving nature. it's just a cover for the sky-high platter of genocidal ecofascism they're trying to push through.)
one of the central themes of lorien legacies is supposed to be 'mourn the dead, fight like hell for the living.' and one of, again, the central conflicts of the series from RoS onward should have been the moral dilemma of realizing that the vatborn are some of the living to fight like hell for, and having no fucking idea how to do that without giving everything else up for lost. instead the moral becomes 'fight like hell for the living, as long as they look enough like me and aren't Icky and i don't have any personal baggage about them, and also as long as they came out of a vagina.'
and like. the really insidious thing about how they frame the mogs versus everyone else--how they try to excuse and distract you from the evil shit the protagonists and their buddies say and do--is that they go 'well i mean sure, they're racist and ableist and genocidal and [laundry list of awful], and have less than no basic fucking decency or compassion toward the Acceptable Group of People, but also they're kind and caring and heroic and nice to other people!' whereas the mogs read as the authors having looked up a Traits of Fascist Societies checklist to hammer into their story without actually understanding how fascism works.
actual fascist societies aren't cartoonishly hateful, joyless, loveless, and sadistically rubbing their hands together over their Evil Plotting on every level of society, every day, with everyone around them. like. it doesn't fucking happen. i don't care how cultish it is, i don't care how rabidly hateful you can whip a movement up to be, you can fuck a society and its norms up horrifically but you CANNOT do that with 99% total success rate on that scale. you know what happens with actual fascism? with hate groups, with colonialism, with genocide?
most of them are, in some aspects of their lives, 'good people.' they pet puppies, they're loving spouses and parents, they're kind and respected members of their community. i'm nice, they think. i'm a Good Person. i care.
and they are completely caught off guard when they are held accountable for the other things they did with their lives, because it doesn't fucking matter how many puppies you pet when you make yourself complicit in genocide. you extend basic human decency to your family and people you happen to find likeable and acceptable, and none of whom you have emotional baggage toward as a group? cool motive, still a war criminal, still blood on your hands.
which, by the way, is another vile thing they try to push through here. 'i'm racist because muh war trauma so i get a blank check to commit atrocities, cut me some slack' is, y'know. famously not a justification used for any horrific mass war crimes in countries invaded by, say, the U.S. in the last few decades alone. vietnam? iraq? are those some kind of chopped liver?
and the fact that they try to hide this shit behind 'well they're genocide survivors and teenagers, you can't expect them to be mature about their war trauma 🥺' is just contrived bullshit to get away with this rhetoric, which is even more obvious when every now and then they try to act like the characters are in their mid-20s or something instead of, you know. 15-18. teenagers are not the ones making these calls irl, pal. they're not the ones devising war tactics or taking out tons of people by themselves in one go. they're not the ones making legislation about what to do with the enemies after the war. are there garde who have to wear a bikini for their photosynthesis legacy too, by any chance
(this is an ESPECIALLY bad look in the context of the vietnam war in particular, considering how frighteningly, violently, genocidally racist these books are toward every fucking east asian country in their line of sight lmao. like holy shit dude it's BAD and this is just another shit in the bucket)
(ETA: HOLY SHIT WOW THE VIETNAM PARALLEL MAKES THE THING WITH JOHN CATCHING A LARGE CONCENTRATION OF MOGS OFF GUARD TO INCINERATE THEM ALL WITH HIS FLAMETHROWER POWERS--BECAUSE 'NOW THEY KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE CAUGHT BY SURPRISE,' NO LESS--SO MUCH FUCKING WORSE EL EM AY OH)
anyway yeah, despite supposedly being a critique of fascism these books are fascist as shit, and it is impossible for me to look at the protagonists being Caring and Compassionate, and Fighting for Peace and Justice and Preservation of All Things Good in the World, without just seeing this:
as usual i have many, many more thoughts about this, and as usual they are for other posts because this one is hella long already, but tl;dr the vatborn deserved better and are pretty much the perfect distillation of why my approach to this series' authors and what they are trying to communicate with their story is 'stay back slut' lmao
#lorien legacies#LL vatborn#LL mogadorians#LL tag#LL crit tag#cws in post#i would read the fuck out of a series that actually incorporated the vatborn into its themes without being Like That about it#i have so many thoughts about the parallels and comparisons between vatborn and loric thing man. Fuck#gotta infodump about that if i have the energy for it later#for now. LL Quit Being Neoliberal Pro-Fascist Propaganda Challenge (Impossible)
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I've been viewing your Red Dwarf Pokemon AU and I love it. I just have a question: In that Universe, are Simulants and GELFs the same as in the original universe, or is it like Cyborg Pokemon and GELFs which are genetically engineered Pokemon (a bit like Mewtwo)?
Omg this is like my second ever ask!!! 😊
Simulants and GELFs are the same as they are in the original universe, but they all have thematically appropriate Pokémon too!
That way there can be Pokémon battles beyond Lister's Snorlax absolutely trouncing Rimmer's Snivy for the 100th time (after Rimmer demands a battle for the 100th time).
In some episodes, they run into Pokémon that are companions to other sentient life forms, and sometimes they run into planets full of wild Pokemon they've never seen before!
Other times, Pokémon on the ship start causing problems:
Lister leaving trash everywhere has resulted in way more Grimer than the ship can sustain and they need to find a trash planet for them to live happily in.
Magnemite have gotten into the ship's engine and are causing increasingly bizarre malfunctions.
A Ditto with sunglasses is out to cause problems by impersonating the ship's crew! Stuff like that!
Every once in a while, they can run into a legendary Pokémon. Which would be hilarious because the boys (with the exception of Kryten) are completely incapable of speaking to a majestic elder god with anything approaching the proper amount of respect!
They do probably run into a Mewtwo (or Mewtwo-like situation) at some point and then they have to deal with an angry super-intelligent, super-powerful, genetically engineered, malevolent Pokémon with major emotional issues.
It'd make for a great multi-part episode or movie special, and I picture it happening shortly before Rimmer goes off to be Ace (whereupon he will achieve the character growth we all deserved to see in canon)!
Early in the special, Lister's kindness is what first plants seeds of doubt about the value of cruelty in the Mewtwo creature's mind.
As the plot progresses, it seems more and more like a heartfelt speech from Lister might solve the whole thing.
But then, Lister is knocked out or temporarily turned into stone during the climax, and it is suddenly up to RIMMER of all people to make a last-ditch appeal to Mewtwo's sense of love and kindness!
("Well! We're doomed!" chirps the Cat, from whatever psychic prison he is stuck in. Kryten, who at this point has been reduced to his eyeballs by a psychic blast, somehow manages to nod in agreement. (But what they don't know is that I, Jack! am the one writing this special! And I am a very specific kind of writer.))
Rimmer looks at the possibly-dead Lister... looks at himself... and then looks at the furious psychic being killing them all...
And he ends up making an impassioned speech about how Lister doesn't deserve this. ("Maybe I do. Maybe even the Cat and Kryten. but not Lister.") About how Lister keeps seeing bits of good in everyone, even Rimmer. Lister even saw good in Mewtwo!
("Please... he's... he's a good man. Yes, he's a disgusting, childish idiot with less brain cells than dead liver cells, but he's a good person. Look into his brain. You have to see that. That has to count for something.")
This is the first time in the series we've seen Rimmer say something nice about Lister. The Cat and Kryten are dumbfounded.
And no one is more surprised than Rimmer that it actually works.
#red dwarf#see jack talk#lister hears about what Rimmer said that day later when rimmer is off being ace and the cat casually mentions it#so much heartache#man remember the holoship episode where rimmer displays a genuine selfless act of kindness for the very first time??#and how they set up the ace arc to be like an obvious evolution of his character???#aND THEN THEY JUST#SEASON 8#ajeowkxjqi dhajflshakdlf 🤬🤬🤬#still one of my favorite shows but this will drive me slowly to insanity over the course of my life#thank goodness for the fanfiction that actually fleshes out the fucking character#also I hear he's really great in the books though I don't know if they actually finish his character arc at any point#I'll get around to reading those someday#red dwarf Pokémon au#maybe someday I will write a story with characters who remind me of them and I will write this arc the way I wish it was#it wouldn't be the first time#the only drawback is I'll never get the original actors as they were in 1980 or whenever that show started.#but I guess it was never going to be gay back then anyway..... or at least not overtly gay....... or at least not intentionally overtly gay#they did give us that Moonlight speech. that is truly good food. also very fucking gay#anyway i am a good writer and everyone should read my free graphic novel on ao3 byyeeeee#i lied i have more to say: RIMMER ONLY EVER NEEDED SOMEONE TO BELIEVE IN HIM AND HIS CHARACTER WORKS BEST WHEN THIS ACTUALLY WORKS#Lister makes rimmer a better man by believing he can be one. repeatedly. stubbornly. stupidly. against all odds.#Lister never stops believing it. it is a beautiful love story if you know where to look (and what to reject wholesale)
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It's not worship and service as most people assume. I take your wider point about Chaos itself, but it's not a case of most interactions with Chaos being anything like religion or worship or faith. Yes, it's easy to convey in video games for people that don't know the setting. "These guys pray to evil gods, therefore they're the bad guys." And yes, in some novels written by writers less familiar with the setting or preferring its rawer edges, it's a common Chaos trope.
And the Word Bearers? Yes. Other cases, absolutely. The majority, absolutely not. Chaos isn't a religion or a disease you catch. It's the everpresent threat of any malicious emotion allowing Something Old And Inhuman into your soul and brain from the reality behind reality. If a battlefield is bloody enough... Bloodletters will appear. If someone is completely decadent and lost in sensational pleasures... Slaanesh will pay attention to them. "Summoning" is the shallow, obvious end of the spectrum, keeping with the video game presentation we often see. It happens, of course, but it's also the obvious version of what happens. Not the only one. Look at Ahriman. He wants nothing to do with Chaos. He does horrible things, selfish things, murderous things, endlessly furthering the goals and presence of Chaos... entirely for himself. He believes he's using it and remains untouched by its control. Khârn didn't enter into any worship or agreement with Chaos. He was marked by it, and everything he does now furthers it. Abaddon doesn't pray to the Gods. He does his own thing and the Gods take heed. None of them worship the Gods. None of them willingly serve them, or would even recognise the idea of it was explained to them. Night Lords kill and kill and kill until daemons show up and swallow the planet. They don't worship Chaos or give a damn about the daemons; it's just an interesting way to commit Exterminatus for them. There's no prayer here, no worship, no service that they'd recognise.
Even if we, with the rulebooks, can say "Ultimately that action serves the Chaos Gods' agendas". Well, I like cheeseburgers. Ultimately that serves obesity and heart disease. I still do it. I've said it on the forum a few times in much greater detail, but it's not a case of organised religion or many Chaos Marines thinking Chaos rocks on toast. They're motivated by their own deals; they hate, they want vengeance, they want recognition, they want to survive. That lets Chaos into their hearts. Add it to where they had to hide in order to survive after the Scouring, and it makes a lot of sense. They're not really praying to Chaos in cults and thinking comedy/useless mutations are super-awesome. The Gods are real, and they know that. They may hate that truth, but they acknowledge it. They may be indifferent to it, but they're aware of it. And they're aware that when it comes to battle, raising an icon of Khorne in the middle of a fight comes with a risk, but it also comes with undeniable benefits. The gains outweigh the risks tenfold, especially in the short term.
Added to that, mutation isn't supposed to be "physically stupid". The point of it is that it's supposed to reflect your inner self and/or the whims of the gods, and it's supposed to make you better. It improves you, in whatever it is you focus on. It makes you better at killing, and harder to kill, which is literally all most Chaos Marines (and Space Marines...) care about. When mutation goes wrong or goes too far and loses its benefit, well, we call those Spawn. And while many Chaos Marines likely fear that fate, it doesn't happen to everyone - or even most of them - so it's not silly to see how most of them suspect they'll escape that fate. Most of them will.
Also, and this is crucial, we have the rulebooks. They don't. it's easy to say "But the Chaos Gods are laughing at them all and screwing them over", but in-universe is that really the case on the ground? The Chaos Marine who sees someone become Spawn: well, they were weak. He's not weak. He'll be more careful. He's more worthy. He won't be a slave, anyway! He's too independent. And he'll phrase his wishes very carefully so the Monkey's Paw doesn't make it all go wrong.
-- Aaron Dembski-Bowden
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A couple details about the dragon God's Message
Like everything I'm tired I'm very sure I'm very sure everyone's going to be sick in their head like it's more nonsense.
But I want to assure you that the dragon deity which is a spirit form cuz it's not a very strong Spirit right now so that's why I may get me wondering how long it will be before it actually makes an attack.
It may be the year 2026 and that God has still has not attacked.
The dragon God may only use a year 2023 as the initiative to go ahead and launch the attack.
Because that number that year is so effing important 2023.
If the gray aliens I'm going to drive you crazy back cuz it doesn't matter once I'm once all hybrid's, Are Gone !
☠️
We're gone there's no bringing us back and then that's when the Real wave of Darkness will Crash into the Earth
Now the Dragon God, Does not want to do the attack from multiple reasons but he has his Divine Duty and he has to do it to the absolute fullest.
He does not want to destroy the body of Gaia, this will also hurt her spirit massively.
He does not want to waste everything that is on the Earth.
Even if we're all dead the faith the insect toys he still doesn't want to waste our home but on top of the fact that the reptilians are truly messed up the part of the universe with a statistics stupid smile because they don't understand holy and Unholy even though dark is Holy is a time and a place for everything and when it comes to stepping outside your bounds you have to get permission from your deity if you can do something or not and if you do something without their permission it falls back on them. - all these throughout the entire universe take full responsibility over what they arbiter over all deities absolutely all deities they have a job they have a career they have a responsibility that lasts them for all of eternity it is all backed up by God and His creation and his hierarchy of the Universe. - and the dragon God is no exception plus no deity gets to become something they don't love they have to truly love something before they can get the job but it's not really focused on as a job but the spiritual passion but it's also a career it's what they love and what they are at the same time.
So I just thought I'd let you know a few things about the dragon deity you probably wondering how I got this information is telepathic which means any 1 can make Shit up 😡 And . . . Any fool can make a Rule and Any Fool to follow it but I swear this stuff the dragon God extremely rarely contact me.
And his message is extremely simple for me he didn't give me a big package of information I had the few experiences a long long time ago with him that he didn't mean to reveal himself to me at all it was a completely accidental he was more focused on the ships flying away from Draco towards the planet that was on my planet when used to be Fairyland even though it was the dilapidated, the whole planet was in Ruined because of alien race, Attacked.
The Reptilian just made it worse by conquering it the planet was in a very sore state and the reptilians just completely took absolute advantage over Earth a long long time ago before the great aliens were even able to create their hybrids also known as the first model of the humans and the first model was not Homo sapiens it was an earlier version of the Neanderthals.
The dragon God watched as many ships fled from Draco constellation to find other planets to live their life on and the dragon God was disgusted ashamed worried sad angry all the most horrible emotions flowing through cuz he can see all the bad that was going to happen.
But the dragon God far back then was severely too weak to do anything his energy was extremely low he was extremely tired and weekend and broken down he wasn't able to leave Draco if he left Draco he would have killed everybody and Draco because they are feeding off his life force, as deities do.
Think of a deity in a way when it comes to spiritual life force and Essence and energy think of them in a way it's kind of like a star if the star were to leave the plan to go somewhere else everybody in the Earth dies but that's a physical thing if the spiritual life force leave somebody the body starts to self-destruct it's a different kind of energy the body is falling apart because it needs that life force so does the soul so the entire thing that makes up the creature the Mind Body and Soul completely gets destroyed.
It's like a fish out of water and all the water in the universe suddenly went away.
But even that's putting in a horrible way because that's a physical thing again.
The dragon God couldn't leave Draco it has to stay rooted in the constellation if it leaves Draco it's going to kill every reptilian there and it takes an extremely long time for alien races to become so advanced that's why deities when they come into an area they just stay one place forever because they can't really move around they really can't they're very much grounded.
Also they're happy there they also don't want to leave cuz they want to be with their creatures they are deities they are in alien race from a different dimension but they still have their career and they still love their morals and however they love their creatures however that goes about it's extremely different that's putting a mile understatement for deity it's all very different and I don't want to get into it.
This is about a simple message to Dragon God has that's all this is.
The dragon God is watching the Earth he's watching and he's waiting to see how things play out and if there is no war in 2023 with the spaceships in the sky if I don't care how ridiculous it sounds I don't care if it sound like the most hilariously retarded mentally ill meth addict psychotics ridiculous thing you've ever heard in your entire life
If there is no war in 2023, With the 🛸🛸🛸
That'll be it for the planet even the gray alien said they're going to blow up the planet but then again if they were to fail I think that's where the dragon God's going to come in because this planet is an extremely Unholy thing everything in the universe to some degree or an extent is connected and when one plant becomes super let's just say out of sync
When one plan becomes extremely out of sync and becomes extremely rotten it starts to draw attention.
The universe has the spiritually flow now I'm not saying the universe is the place of positivity in Goodwill but there is a nature to things also I think Gaia is too weak to fight off the reptilians as well.
So on top of it all there's a bunch of sleazy guys are sleazy life forms on this planet who took full advantage of tired weaken down to deities and an alien race that got their ass kicked by another alien race because they accidentally trespassed and talked a lot of smack to these other alien race a couple other people not the vast majority and that NRA came back and blew everybody up and kill everybody on the earth and a massive flash War then no one the Earth was going to happen at all and then long story short the right conquered the Earth for the great had a chance even find a way to rebuild their people back and that war has been happening ever since.
! ! ! BUT ! ! !
Not all the reptilians are Evil, quite a few of them are actually kind of good and they actually want to do good in the world.
So do not do not have the word reptilian synonyms with the word evil reptile doesn't mean evil reptile means reptile that's all that means crocodiles are reptile turtles are reptile lizards a reptile Komodo dragons eruptile snake is definitely a reptile.
These are Reptiles.
Do not look at the word reptilian as a word meaning demonic life form because reptilians aren't Evil by Nature like many some of the universe may be there may be some some race in the universe there are pure evil if it's not always going to be a mixed bag.
But there's a lot of assholes in the reptilian race but then again in nature you have to be tough to survive the universe the giant law of the jungle thing so a one side they have their right to be so hyper aggressive meaning cold on the other right there's a spiritual responsibility to everyone has to kind of like not mess up the planet this is why space travel is so hard.
you're not supposed to do it.
Anyway, I made a giant post it probably nobody's ever going to read especially not down to this point.
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Chamber of Reflection
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
Pairing: Sherlock Holmes x Male!Reader
Summary: Oh dearest Sherlock, are you ready to move on?
Word Count: 2,329
Warning: Blood and Death
“I don’t believe in love.”
You scoff out a laughter before turning to look at them, your smile dropped as you looked at them incredulously, “You’re kidding me right?”
“No?” They questioned back as if it was totally obvious because that’s how they were as a person, “I just don’t believe in love.”
“Impossible,” You shake your head, “Everyone believes in love, you, you’re different. You believe you don’t deserve love. That’s a whole different thing.”
Sherlock rolls his eyes, “Same thing.”
“Absolutely not, Sherlock,” You folded your arms over your chest, “Your mother loves you, that’s family love. John loves you, that’s platonic love. I love you.”
“What type of love is that?”
“Figure it out, smartass.”
He never really figured it out.
Sherlock was smart, but he’s dumb at the same time.
He could rattle your ear off with different topics that he was interested in. He could give you a rundown about who you are and he probably knew you better than you knew yourself. But, give him a topic on a basic thing - he’ll malfunction.
“The planets? Sherlock, surely you couldn’t have deleted that out your head.”
“You underestimate me, (Y/n).”
“Clearly,” You replied dryly, rolling your eyes, “But, I know you didn’t bring me here to talk about what basic stuff you’ve decided to ignore or have deleted from your so-called hardware.”
“At least you’re able to keep up with me,” Sherlock comments as you give yourself a little nod to the side as acknowledgement.
“Well, what is it?”
“Talk to me more about love, please.”
You narrow your eye at him, tilting your head to the side for a second, you were suspicious of his intention before sighing and tending to his question - after all, it is rare to have Sherlock say please, it’s not an opportunity to pass up.
“How desperate must you be for this information as you did say please.”
“Don’t mock me.”
“Alright,” you had your hands up in defence, “Well, love is different to each person and I can’t really help you that much Sherlock because it’s a learning process and it’ll be brutal. In a...somewhat good way.”
“That doesn’t explain anything at all!”
You couldn’t help but laugh, shaking your head, “When you love someone, you just kinda know.”
“Right.”
“And...”
“Well, spit it out.”
You give him a soft smile, almost as if you knew something he didn’t know. Like you had to bit your tongue and refuse to tell him. He looks at your eyes, there is a glint of sadness, though he doesn’t comment on it as he allows you to speak.
“Love is going to ruin you someday, it doesn't matter if you don't believe in love, it doesn't matter if you think that you don't have the capacity to love someone, nothing matters. What matter is that one day you will fall in love and fall so hard that it will ruin you to the point that you will not be able to think correctly, to the point that your illness and cure both will be the love of your life, love will ruin you to the point you will look for sanity in insanity.”
“Back again so soon, Sherlock?”
He doesn’t answer you as he stands across from where you had claimed as your spot, you tilt your head in confusion at his silence, Sherlock loves to talk so why isn’t he talking.
“Must be a rough day then, ay Sherlock?” You continue to talk, “I don’t blame you, having a fight with your best friend and then your brother being annoying as ever - Mycroft just doesn’t shut up.”
“How do you know about my day, this is the first time I’ve seen you this week?” Sherlock questions.
You knitted your eyebrows together, your lips pursed together, as you give him room to think before interrupting.
“When will you come to the terms that you’re the one who killed me?”
At that moment, Sherlock stops. If a record of music was playing then it did the scratching halt. Sherlock looks over to your way, he didn’t realise that at some point he had stopped looking at you, you sat there with your arms crossed over your chest.
“You’re not dead.”
“Not in your mind palace, Sherlock,” You say, you look at your surrounding, “In here, I’m very much...alive.”
“You’re not dead,” Sherlock stammers out, blinking frantically, “You’re here, in front of me.”
You dismissed his words, “Funny, each time you come to talk to me, we’re in the same room you killed me in. I have to give you props, though, you really have memorised the room I died.”
“It was your house.”
“Yeah!” You snapped your finger and pointed to him, “You remembered, I’m slightly touched.”
“You can’t be dead.”
“And we’re back to denial,” You hummed, sitting comfortably on the edge of the sink, “Look around you Sherlock, you’re just blocking and deleting things out.”
“No, I am not.”
“Look at the blood, Sherlock.”
Your voice was firm as he shuts his eyes, hoping you had calm down because he could clearly hear anger behind the words you spat. Sherlock opens his eyes and there, he saw the full picture.
You sat on the sink of the kitchen, behind you were the windows and adjacent to your head was cabinets. Both were painted with the splatter of blood. He looked at your appearance, there was red upon your hands and your clothes...
Your clothes, every time he had visited you, you were still in the same clothes - he wouldn’t have mentioned anything to you about it, he knows from you and John that pointing stuff out can be offensive.
Your clothes, they were drenched in blood - your blood.
“Look me in the eyes, Sherlock, look at me.”
Sherlock doesn’t want to, he wants to rearrange the whole scenario and pretend that everything was rainbows and happy, yet he looked at you. He stared deep into your eyes and had to stop himself from gagging at the scene.
There was a bullet hole at your forehead, dried blood seems to drip from the wound when it was fresh.
“Don’t you remember Sherlock?” You asked, looking at him, “You killed, but at what cost?”
“I-”
“I mean, I know why you killed me, after all, I’m just living in your head so I get to know about what you’re thinking and all. But, I really want to hear it from your own mouth.”
Sherlock felt like he was stuck in this nightmare because essentially he was, he couldn’t just snap back into reality or wake up from his sleep. He felt like you had restraints on him and he’s unable to breakthrough.
“I killed you...” He murmurs as you lean forward, “I killed you because I loved you.”
You chuckled, softly, “Love, it makes you do real crazy things.”
See, Sherlock kept you in his head because you were important to him. You were his first and only love, you and Sherlock have known each other since primary school. You had been his only friend, even if he kept pushing you away.
You were the only one who could keep up with his smarts and his weird little thinking, but you were by his side - his first best friend. The man he loved. When the two of you got into high school, you and him were often seen together. You humanised Sherlock, back then he understood what it means to feel.
He was human back then, not this sociopathic man that he grew up to be. Sherlock loved you, just like you loved him. Even if you never really said anything out loud, he knew that you loved him with the way you grabbed him by his wrist and leading him away, it was the soft smile, gentle looks and caring words.
He wished he was able to spend a little longer being your boyfriend because you two managed fess up your feelings when you were eighteen. You were about to go to University, away from Sherlock. He wished he had mustered the courage to ask you to be his boyfriend years before.
“Sherlock, I’m not mad that you killed me.”
Sherlock snapped back into his room with you, you looked at him with the same caring eyes he grew up with, he tilts his head in confusion, he’s missing something in this memory - did he block it out or did he deleted it forever?
“They would have killed me anyway, I don’t have a life further than this Sherlock, both you and I know this,” He listens to your tender voice carefully, you’re no longer angry at him just angry that Sherlock refuses to move on, “You and I did it, Sherlock, you framed the murder perfectly on them.”
Them.
Who was them?
Sherlock looks at you before he hurled himself into the memory.
“You’re bleeding!”
“I’m quite aware of that Sherlock!”
Sherlock stands by the doorway of the kitchen, it’s messy as you sat on the sink, lifting your shirt to see the wound. You cringed, even Sherlock couldn’t remember what had happened to make you look like this and losing blood rapidly.
“You’re being remarkably calm about this.”
“Thanks, it’s the shock. Give me fifteen minutes, the screaming will happen,” You say, pulling your shirt down and you looking at your boyfriend.
“We need to take you to the hospital.”
“Absolutely not, Sherlock, if they found out I went there. They’ll kill me!”
“They’ll kill you either way!” Sherlock pressed on, “Please, there must be some other way.”
“You kill me,” You said almost immediately, you looked at him with sharp eyes.
“No, (Y/n), no, are you an idiot?” Sherlock hissed at you, “There is another way, we just have to think about it.”
“We don’t have time to think, Sherlock,” You admitted, “They kill me, they’ll hind the evidence and go live another day, free, do you want that for me?”
“Of course not!” Sherlock was offended that you would suggest that, “I can prove that they kill you, I can do it - you can trust me.”
“I trust you, Sher,” You say, desperate and lovingly, “But, wouldn’t it be better to frame them?”
Sherlock stood there, weighing out the pros and cons in your thinking. Perhaps it was clouded, his judgement as he sees you point out a gun on the kitchen table and reminding him to use a glove so they don’t pick up any of his fingerprints.
What was going through Sherlock’s mind? He wouldn’t be able to tell you, because when he aimed the gun at you there was no thought behind his eyes. You swallowed nervously.
“Hey, Sherlock?”
“Yes?”
“Just know I love you, and I will never hold it against you.”
“I know.”
“Sherlock?” He looks back at you, “Oh, good, you’re responsive.”
“I never said I love you.”
“Oh, Sherlock,” you laughed, he pretends that it didn’t slightly hurt him, “You think I didn’t know?”
Sherlock looked down then back up at you, you were back in clean clothes and the surrounding of your kitchen was clean. Though, you didn’t look phased.
“I mean-”
You raised an eyebrow, “You did at least frame them right? My parents?”
Sherlock knitted his eyebrows, “No.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Oh.”
Sherlock looks at you, watches you breathe in and out, there was a clear disappointment and you had stopped intensely watching him. You turn to look back at him, he was surprised to see you smile at him as you clapped your hand.
“Well, I’m not going to shy away from saying that I am disappointed, perhaps that’s why you blocked out the memory,” You spoke, crossing your arms.
“I can fix it!”
“Can you?”
“I made a name for myself, (Y/n), Mycroft can help me as well as Craig-”
“Greg-”
“Whatever, and we can finally bring you justice, maybe you could be at peace.”
“It’s not me that I’m concern for peace, Sherlock, you’re the one who keeps me alive in your mind palace,” You admitted as you lay down the reality of Sherlock, “It’s time to let me go. The question is: Are you ready?”
Mycroft comes knocking at the door, he was greeted by John.
“Sherlock is busy,” John says from his armchair as Mycroft enters without a proper invite.
Mycroft looks around the room before stopping at the bookshelves, a picture frame that was permanently situated as face down was now standing, showing the picture that was kept hidden from the world.
Mycroft makes his way towards it as John looks at him.
“Sherlock put it up yesterday, along with a new case.”
“Oh? Is that so?” Mycroft leered, softly smiling to himself, “What’s the case about?”
“The murder of (Y/n) (L/n), Sherlock is convinced that it wasn’t suicide, though I don’t know how he knows about the case, that was closed over a decade ago - at least that’s was Lestrade said.”
“Watson, do you know who is standing next to Sherlock in this picture?”
John looked at the picture, he could recognise Sherlock when he was younger. he still had the curls and bright blue eyes, standing straight up, next to him was a boy smiling and had his arm over the sociopath’s shoulder - though back then, you could hardly call Sherlock a sociopath.
“No?”
“That is (Y/n) (L/n),” Mycroft says as John’s eyebrow raised up, “He is the reason why Sherlock snapped and changed in his behaviour. His death caused Sherlock to lose his pathway.”
“He means a lot to Sherlock?”
“Well, he is the only person Sherlock truly love romantically. Perhaps the first and love of Sherlock.”
“Sherlock loved him?”
“He still does, it’s why he’s reopening this case because dear Watson, between us two and Sherlock. This is not a case to solve a murder, this is to frame someone of murder and we’re going to help him.”
#sherlock BBC#sherlock imagine#sherlock bbc imagine#sherlock holmes x male reader#x male reader#personal favourite
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I don’t want to be a huge asshole, but...
There are a lot of people trying to find a modicum of positivity in the finale. It’s not about this Destiel-Bibro war that’s happened over the years, it’s not about Cas, it’s not about any of the superficial drama. This finale was the weirdest mixture of OOC and in character writing I have ever seen.
Things that are in character:
The brothers put each other first. They are each other’s safe place and stability. Up until the very end. Sam respected Dean’s wishes, stayed with him in his last moments, and let him go gracefully. Sam even went on and had a full life so Dean’s sacrifices weren’t in vain.
For Dean, Heaven wasn’t perfect without Sam there. And he had this huge sense of relief and happiness when Sam arrived.
Jack deconstructed the walls of Heaven so that it was a vast place where everyone could be together. They weren’t living out their “best memories” anymore. They were creating new memories eternally with each other. And Bobby recognizing that Jack is like Dean’s son by saying, “That boy of yours...”
Cas helped build the Heaven that he always dreamed of. Cas always had such a high standard for Heaven, and it always fell short. He helped Jack build a home that was warm and comforting and beautiful and open and loving and true. Everything Cas stood for.
Bobby, the man Dean adopted as his father, was there to share a beer with him (just like Dean shared with his dad in his childhood). And Bobby was happy and confirmed that Dean is in a Heaven he deserves.
Sam mourning Dean’s death for the rest of his life, but also living his life to honor Dean. Classic Sam.
Dean using his last moments to tell Sam how much he loves him and how proud he is. Sam deserved to hear that because we all know Sam looked at Dean as a parental figure.
Things that are OOC:
Sam not marrying Eileen. The show created this HUGE story arc around Sam and Eileen and their real love and connection. And then they shoot this finale and couldn’t even get an actress that looked like Eileen to stand it the blurry background. Like, I don’t care what you say, it’s NOT open to interpretation. Sam did not end up with Eileen. All of you people who are Sam stans, who say you want your character to be happy and live a full life should be livid. Sam ending up with Eileen wouldn’t have canceled out the fact that Dean was/is his number one person. Dean gave his blessing for Eileen, and he loved her and welcomed her into their lives because he knew Sam loved her and had a genuine connection with her. Having them together would not have ruined the ending in any way. Sam still could have ended up with Dean on that bridge.
That woman with the blonde/light brown hair is NOT Eileen. They couldn’t even get an actress with dark brown hair to keep hope alive that they ended up together. Absolutely awful.
Dean just accepting Cas’ death and not even talking about it, other than to say, “Yeah I think about em’ too.” I don’t care if you don’t believe in Destiel or that the love was reciprocated. Dean EXCLUSIVELY said multiple times that Cas is a member of their family and a brother to the boys. He said the words, “YOU”RE MY BEST FRIEND.” I’m not saying Dean should have scarified himself to go pull Cas out of the Empty (because we had 40 minutes to wrap up 15 years). But the fact that Dean was like: I’m gonna eat some pie and just not acknowledge any feelings or thoughts and act like nothing ever happened is SO OOC. If your best friend died tragically, you’d have something to say about it or act like you had something to say about it. And that’s not to say I wanted Dean to be miserable and hurting. I’m happy he got a dog and found some normalcy. But they lost SO many people, and he’s just walking around cool as a cucumber? When every other season/episode where they lost someone important to Dean he was a mess. And I’m not just talking about Cas- we all obviously know how Dean behaved when Cas died/was missing/Lucifer was controlling him. But even when Jo and Ellen died. Even when Mary died. Even when Bobby died. Even when John died. Even when Crowley died. Even when Jack died, Dean was shown hurting. Suddenly everything is cool and normal there’s no pain or anything? The fuck? A brief moment of acknowledgement. That’s all it needed.
I will never forgive the writers for ending Dean’s story that way. A rusty nail impaling him (probably in his pulmonary arteries/aorta based on the angle) on some random hunt after he finally exhaled the episode before and said, “We’re finally free.” He sacrificed his ENTIRE childhood and life for his brother and the world and so many other people, and he didn't even get to enjoy being a human on the Earth and living a life for more than a week. What! Dean was always a character filled with tragedy, and yeah, maybe he did have to die. You can make that argument. But like that?! AND. AND! Sam held a funeral for Dean and DIDN’T INVITE ANYONE! What!!! No one was there to toast to Dean and share their memories and give him the send-off he deserved. Sam just burned his body alone. Never. That would have NEVER happened. Sam loved Dean SO much and looked up to him and thought the world of him. Dean was his big brother who was fearless and strong and the best hunter on this Earth (and probably every other planet), and he didn’t celebrate his life in the end?
Cas not showing up in Heaven is absolutely insane. INSANE. It doesn’t matter what you think of their relationship, the show has proven that Cas is important to Dean (even if you think Cas is way at the bottom of the list, he’s on it!). Dean’s ideal retirement/endgame was him, Sam, and Cas on a beach, drinking cocktails, with hula girls. That was the future Dean wanted for him and his family. And you’re telling me that Cas helped Jack build the best version of Heaven possible, and the minute Dean Winchester arrived Cas wasn’t there to greet him. Even just to say “Hello, Dean.” Even call Dean’s phone and say, “Welcome home.” Cas would have been the one greeting Dean in Heaven, with Bobby. Requited or not, it’s canon that Cas is in love with Dean. You don’t just ignore the opportunity to see the person you’re in love with. And... and! Even if Cas didn’t greet Dean in Heaven immediately, he would have appeared in the Impala during the drive. He would have met the brothers on the bridge to welcome them both home. Cas loved Sam too. He would have been there. The three boys together again. Team Free Will!
I love Cas, and I know a lot of Cas stans feel buried and betrayed and hurt over the show doing a “is he there or isn’t he?” thing. And that is completely valid. I can’t even express to you how sorry I am that so many of us in the fandom are hurting. But I know this show. And this show has always made it clear that it was/is always about two brothers. Fine. But Dean Winchester, the most caring and loving human in the entire universe, deserved better. I am so sick to my stomach that Dean’s whole life was him convinced that there was only one way for his story to end and it was him dying tragically. For years he never let himself even entertain the thought of living a life because he 1) didn’t think he deserved that or was worth it 2) it just wasn’t in the cards. We watched Dean grow so much, SO MUCH, that we finally saw him talking about the future and having hope for the future. And yeah, maybe he wouldn’t get the future he talked about with the retirement on the beach, but he would have lived long enough to experience life outside of just “playing whack-a-mole” and being God’s favorite story and puppet. Dean didn’t even get to enjoy his freedom and humanity. They took a character that they purposefully pushed through so many stages of character development to attain hope and faith and self-worth and promise, and killed him.
What the fuck!
#spn finale#spn 15x20#spn 15.20#spn spoilers#I truly have no words#it was such lazy writing I don't even know#dean winchester#Sam Winchester#castiel#jack kline#bobby singer#Team Free Will#team free will 2.0#saileen#eileen leahy#sam and eileen#sam x eileen#destiel#deancas#dean/castiel#dean x castiel#cas#my fucking heart hurts so badly#spn meta
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Stronger together.
Supercorp, Kara Danvers x Daughter!Reader, Lena Luthor x Daughter!Reader, Alex Danvers x Niece!Reader
Word count: 2410.
“Starting today, Superkid doesn’t exist anymore.”
The look you get from everyone is of absolute horror. Like you just told them you decided to become a supervillain and you’re going to destroy planet Earth in thirty seconds.
Funny enough, that’s the amount of time it takes for one of them to be able to say something.
“Wait a second.” Aunt Alex is the first one to react. “You’re telling me that the best superhero in National City is quitting? No offense, Kara.”
“None taken, I agree!” Kara jumps right after. “I thought you loved supering?”
“Yeah…” You shrug. “But I love my life a little bit more, so-”
“Baby, shouldn’t you give more thought to this? We’ll support you no matter what, but this is a huge decision.” Lena adds with a concerned tone. You smile.
“Dear Rao, you guys are turning this into a bigger deal than it is.” You roll your eyes with a reassuring smile. “It’s not like I’ll stop existing. I’ll just be a normal teenage girl from now on. Y’know, like Jamie over here.”
“Yeah, well, but-” It’s not hard, but rendering Kara speechless is always exciting.
“Ok, good talk.” You get out of the living room and Jamie follows you into your room.
“Oh wow.” She throws herself in your bed. “That was so dramatic. Thanks for texting me a heads up, I would be shocked if I had found out like that.”
You smile, dismissing it with your hand. “They’ll get over it. It’s not like I was always a superhero anyway.”
“That’s true!” Jamie agrees with her head for a while. “You did save a bunch of people while you were at it, though.”
You shrug.
“Lena was saved so many times, I wonder if she would still be alive if it weren’t for you.” Jamie adds and you look back at her furrowing your eyebrows.
“Supergirl would have saved her.” You don’t even believe your own words.
“Really? Last time I checked Supergirl was unconscious next to her in the Fortress.”
“Well, I-” You squint your eyes. “Stop it. I know what you’re doing. You want me to quit quitting. Well, it’s not going to work. I won’t quit! Quitting, I mean. I won’t quit quitting.” You growl. “Whatever, just stop it.”
“What are you talking about? I’m not trying to make you quit quitting. Especially because, apparently, you can’t super without almost killing yourself. And I don’t like the feeling of losing you every time.”
“You never actually lost me.”
“Ok, standing beside your bed at the DEO not sure if you’re going to wake up is very close to losing you. I don’t think my brain can make the distinction.” Jamie mumbles and your heart squeezes on your chest. You hug her without saying a word, and she lets out a breath that looks like she was holding it for a while.
“I’m sorry for almost dying several times. I promise that things will be easier now.” You shrug and she agrees with her head.
“At least until the next time your hero complex kicks in.” She jokes and you roll your eyes at her. “But you did save me, so… I don’t know. The idea of you not being a superhero is sort of bittersweet.”
“Yeah.” You sit next to her. “To me too.”
“But we will make do.” She throws her arm around your shoulder, hugging you sideways. “Because we are stronger together.”
“Yes, we are.” You agree with a smile.
It’s late at night when the game downstairs ends and Alex shows up at your door to call Jamie. Before leaving, aunt Alex hugs you tight.
“I’m gonna miss saving the world with you.” Alex says with a smile. “You are much better at that than Kara.”
“HEY!” You hear Kara’s interjection downstairs.
“Stop listening to our private conversation!” Alex yells back at her. She puts her hand on your shoulder. “I’ll step up my game of saving people, in your place.”
“That brings me peace of mind.” You smile, earning a reassuring squeeze on your shoulder.
“I’m here for you. You know that, right? Stronger together.” Aunt Alex asks and you hug her in agreement. “Great. I love you, kiddo. You’re my favorite Luthor-Danvers.”
You both stop talking and wait to hear Kara’s reaction. It doesn’t come.
“I’m shocked she obeyed.” Alex says making her way to the stairs and you wave at her.
“I love you too, aunt Alex.”
“Knock, knock.” You hear on the other side of the door, a little before you go to bed. You smile because Kara is such a dork.
“You know, you can actually knock on the door instead of saying it, right?” You say on the other side and Kara opens the door with the biggest smile on her face.
“HA HA, I didn’t know I had raised such a comedy expert.” She jokes, making her way to where you are on your bed. “How are you, little one?”
“I’m great.” You smile at her, sincerely. You are great. Deciding not to be Superkid just took off the biggest weight you’ve been carrying on your shoulders. You feel lighter.
“You know I completely support you.” Kara says, putting one lock of your hair behind your ear. “Whatever you want to do with your life, I’ll be by your side.”
“Thanks, momma.” You smile at her. “I support you too, in case you want to quit anything.”
She chuckles. “Thank you, that’s very sweet of you.” But her expression turns serious after a few seconds. “Being a superhero is-” She sighs, looking for words. You have a bunch to offer her. Exhausting, emotionally draining, insane, traumatic. “Weird.”
“To say the least.”
“Yeah.” Kara lays her head on your lap, looking at you from down there. “It’s weird to describe it because it’s a mix of things. Sometimes-” She smiles looking excited. “It’s the most thrilling feeling in the universe. When you’re up there, wind blowing in your head, and that powerful feeling that you can do and go anywhere. And sometimes you save someone, and oh man!”
“You feel invincible. Like you can take on the world.” You add, and Kara agrees vividly with her head.
“But sometimes, for the lack of a better word, it just straight up sucks.” Kara crinkles her nose, and you smile at how cute she looks. “Sometimes you feel like, yeah you know, I could die for these people because I love them with all my heart.”
“I know that feeling.”
“And they love you so much too! It just feels worthy, right?” She asks and you agree with your head. “But sometimes it doesn’t feel like that. It feels the opposite. There were a few times when I was this close to dying, and I kept thinking ‘but why Kara? Why are you leaving everyone you love behind to die for people who don’t even appreciate you?’”
“Why would you?”
“Kid. I-I don’t know.” Kara lets out another chuckle. “You know what it's like. You’re up there, and you know it has to be you because no one else can do what you’re doing. And there’s something inside that just stops us from turning away and letting it all play out how it was supposed to.”
You also know that feeling. That’s how you ended up in outer space in another reality to save people you didn’t even know that well. To save a reality that wasn’t even yours. And you had the chance to turn your back to it, over and over again. Yet, you never took the easy path.
“What I came here to tell you, is that I get it. I get the feeling. I’ve had it a million of times. When I was giving everything to the world, and it kept taking things from me. I thought about giving up so many times it’s ridiculous.” Kara sighs again. You put your hand on her hair, stroking it gently for support. “So, yeah, I understand.”
“But?” You ask with a tiny smile.
“But if you ever want to do it again, I’ll understand and support you too.” She gets up from your lap and kisses your forehead. “And if you ever need to talk to anyone about this superhero stuff, you can always come to me, cause I’m sure I probably felt the same thing once or twice in my life. Ok? We’re stronger together.”
“Ok, momma. Thank you.”
“Momma got you, little one. Always.” She hugs you tight, and you breathe deep, feeling her comfort. “If I’m being honest, I’m sort of excited that I won’t have to go fish you in outer space anymore.”
“Me too.” You chuckle on her chest. “It’s exhausting, almost dying all alone in a pitch-black dark place with no air in your lungs.”
“It sounds like it.” Kara lets go of you and looks at you, adoringly. “I love you so much, you’re my heart.”
“And you’re mine.” You smile, getting another forehead kiss from Kara.
“Ok, go to bed. It’s late.” She moves to the door but stays there watching you for a little bit. “You’re the best kid in the universe, and we’re so lucky to have you.”
“Thanks momma.” You smile, thankful. It’s good to hear that. In normal circumstances this would make you happy. But where you find yourself right now, it’s even better. It’s good to be reassured that you’re understood, and you’re loved no matter what, and that even though you just gave up being a superhero you’re still the best kid for her. Rao, you love Kara so much.
“Hey.” You hear a soft knock on the door. You don’t use your x-ray vision. You don’t have to. Kara just left so it’s obviously not her.
“Come in, mom.” You say and Lena opens the door, softly. She puts her head inside your bedroom and smiles at you.
“Oh, great. I just wanted to check on you, but you’re going to sleep, right?” She asks and you agree with your head. “Great. Good night, babygirl.”
“Mom, can I ask you something?” You ask and Lena goes inside your bedroom, agreeing with her head. “Can you, um, stay a little?”
“Yeah!” Lena agrees excitedly, like that was exactly what she was thinking. She makes her way to the bed next to you, getting under the comforter with you.
“Sorry for being so codependent these days, I just-”
“Stop.” Lena says pulling you closer. “Come hug me.” You toss your arm over her, and she kisses the top of your head. You can’t see her face, but you know she’s smiling. “I’ve been feeling very codependent too. Actually, if you would have me, I would have been sleeping with you since you were five. But I guess you wanted your independence.”
“Not anymore.” You sigh, hugging her tightly. “I’ve missed you.”
“You know, I went to L Corp after what happened. There were pictures of you everywhere.” You can genuinely hear her smile. “I just kept thinking how crazy that was, but how hard I needed it to be true. Your little face. I mean don’t get me wrong, Kara’s face is beautiful, and I really wanted her to be my family too. But you. I wish I could explain the feeling.”
“It’s like-” You start. “Like this feeling that nothing would make sense. And that, yeah, you would have other people you love around you, but that missing piece is so fundamentally meaningful for the bigger picture, for your life, to make sense. Without it, all of it would fall into pieces and fade into a life you wouldn’t want to live.”
Your ear is so glued to Lena’s chest that you can hear her heart skipping a beat, without having to use your super hearing. You lift your head to look at her, and she’s crying silent tears with a smile on her face.
“Was that how you felt without me?” She asks and you nod, biting your lower lip. “Oh, my baby!” She pulls you into the hug again. “My baby.”
Lena just spends a few minutes stroking your hair, gently. It feels so nice you feel yourself dozing off to sleep. But you wouldn’t want to keep her stuck under you, so you fight it.
“Listen-” Lena calls you and you change position so you can look at her. “I know I wasn’t always as supportive as I should’ve been about your supering. It’s not that I don’t appreciate it. I mean, I have to appreciate it more than anyone because you keep saving my life. It’s just, when you’re out there, I get so scared.”
“I know.” You agree softly. “But momma is out there too, and you-”
“Almost die every time she gets just the tiniest scratch. Yeah.” She smiles, and you furrow your eyebrows. “But I sort of, oof, this is hard to say. When I married your momma, I knew who she was, what she does, I knew how saving the world was important for her. I knew I could lose her to it, eventually.” Lena breathes deep, wiping her tears. “But you? I can’t fathom the thought that one day I may lose you. I just-I just can’t.”
“Well, I’m not a hero anymore so you don’t have to worry.” You reassure her, but Lena bites her tongue, definitely not reassured.
“I’ll always worry. And you know why?” Lena asks and you shake your head, disagreeing. “Because you are my baby. And even when you’re forty you’ll still be my baby, and I’ll still be terrified just to think about you not being in my life anymore.”
“What if I get married and have kids and move somewhere else?” You ask and Lena smiles at the thought.
“That will happen! And then-” She whispers to you, so Kara can’t hear her. Which is ridiculous because if Kara is listening, she can hear her breath, let alone her words. “I’ll leave Kara in the middle of the night, and go to your house, kick your wife to another bedroom, and snuggle in with you like we’re doing right now.”
You chuckle at the thought. God, you love Lena so much. “You promise?”
“Of course.” Lena kisses your forehead. “We’re stronger together.”
You smile at her words, and close your eyes again, feeling like you can finally fall asleep. But you still hear, somewhere far away, before you sleep completely, Lena’s voice reassuring you. “I love you, babygirl. All of you. Always.”
Notes:
Hope this count as the fluffiest of fluffs @lonelydiary cause I thought they were so sweet here 💙
#supergirl#kara danvers#supercorp#supercorpfamily#lena luthor#supercorp daughter#kara x lena#kara x reader#supercorp fanfic#lena x reader#reader insert#alex danvers#superkid
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Can we get a fic where Jaster somehow gets sent to the future or something and him reacting to the clones? (Being pissed off that his ad would do something like this to these poor kids/ just reacting to them?)
(this one was so. fecking. hard. to write, i’ve been struggling with it for weeks, but i’m glad i did, because this is by far the best version i made of it. it’s interesting in how much my opinion of jango’s decision to be the template has changed since i first got this ask, and i was definitely coming at it with this post in mind for their characterisations here.
i love hondo. so you get hondo knowing jaster from pre-civil war days, and i don’t care if canon disagrees: hondo ohnaka has been terroising house mereel for three generations.
also i’ve already had a few people donate to my ko-fi and i’m completely floored by your kindness and generosity, and i sat down with this fill knowing i wanted to get it out as soon as possible. i sincerely love you all, i hope you’re all healthy and being as safe as possible.)
Alt+R to Quick Reblog on Desktop, Hold the Reblog Symbol to Quick Reblog on Mobile
“Oh, Jango? We keep him here.” —Lama Su, AotC
-
By some will of the Ka’ra, it’s Boba that finds him.
The possibility of dying in his ad’s arms hadn’t exactly crossed Jaster’s mind until it happened, like a nightmare he had never even had. For the first time since the Fett farm burned, Jaster cursed the Ka’ra, and he curses them again when he wakes up not marching* to the stars, but standing knee-deep in the snows of Galidraan
And the Ka’ra make sure he knows it’s Galidraan though he had never been there, just as he somehow knows Jango is long-since dead. That he is a dislocated bone in the universe, snapped out of time and place and thrown into a future where Jango’s face stares at him from a body that is not his.
“Oh,” the teen with Jango’s nose says, the snow coming all the way up to their thighs, and they don't look dressed nearly warm enough for this biome. “Did Hondo send you?”
Jaster blinks at them. “Did...? No, ad’ika, I have not spoken to Hondo in many years.” Maybe he shouldn’t be surprised Hondo is even still alive, Maker knows Jaster’s tried to kill him enough times himself, but if the number of years since his death on Korda Six is as many as he thinks it is, surely someone would have shot him by now.
The teen doesn’t wear beskar’gam —it’s unlikely they’re even old enough to— but the style of the armor they do wear cannot be inspired by anything else, just reminiscent enough of evaar’gam that Jaster can’t help comparing every little detail about them with the faded image of Jango in his mind.
“Then who the kriff are you?” They eye Jaster warily, left hand twitching towards the vibroblade at their hip.
Promising to strangle every one of the Ka’ra when he can finally march away, and throwing the last of his caution down to the snow between them, Jaster simply says, “Jaster Mereel.”
Impossibly, though maybe not entirely, not-Jango doesn’t laugh at him, or call him crazy, or even try to shoot him with the rifle slung over their shoulder. No, they straighten to their full height, and—
And swear so colorfully in Huttese that Jaster knows this hell-child has absolutely been raised by Hondo Ohnaka.
-
Boba takes him to the ruins of Kamino first, where the kriffing Sith Empire has destroyed another one of his people’s homes.
The growth labs were all blown into the ocean by imperial ilk soon after the formation of the empire, but the barracks and some of the training rooms still stand above the waves. In the ship he says belonged to Jango, Boba steers them to a dilapidated landing pad, controlling the Slave I (Maker, had Jaster really left Jango to that fate?) far too easily through the rubble for this to be his first time to return, and Jaster tries not to think about what that means.
Walking the dark, grimy white halls, seeing the narrow bunks and bare req rooms, he then tries not to think about a child being raised in such a place, about hundreds of thousands of children being raised in such a place. How had Jango... chosen this for them?
“I only have his stories,” Boba tells him quietly, when he shows Jaster the tiny apartment the Kaminoans had given them to “keep Jango close”. It’s bigger than most captain’s cabins, to be sure, but it is just as plain and white as the rest of the facility. “But he couldn’t even get one hundred Mandalorians to come and train the... clones.” He shuffles his feet uncomfortably as Jaster looks into the cupboard-sized kitchen and tries not to break down at the package of Mandalorian chiles rotted away on the counter. “Everyone else was New Mandalorian or Death Watch.”
“And the rest... they fell at the Battle of Galidraan?”
“Buir always called it a massacre,” he looks away. “Only a handful of the Cuy’val Dar even considered themselves True Mandalorians, buir was there when the Jedi killed the rest.”
Jaster inhales deeply, takes a few moments to steady himself, and is sickeningly, horrifyingly relieved. By the Maker, but knowing Jango had had no one left before his Kamino contract, that not even Skirata followed the codex anymore, that Jango had only taken the job after forcing Tyranus to give him an unaltered clone, makes Jaster guilty for having doubted his foundling. It doesn’t excuse anything, of course, but knowing Jango had done it all for aliit, well, it does make it easier to swallow.
Boba leads him back out of the apartment, he had already stripped it of anything important years ago, and they don’t stick around after reboarding the Slave I. Only after they’re out of atmosphere with hyperspace coordinates for Tatooine in the astronav system does Boba join Jaster in the tiny galley with a bottle of tihaar that Jaster should probably reprimand him for, but won’t.
“He tried to pretend he didn’t care, about the others,” Boba says and doesn’t even bother to find them glasses, “I think some days he even believed it.”
“He always was stubborn as a rancor.”
Boba takes a long pull from the bottle before passing it across the table. “Tyranus scared the shit out of me back then, he was too... put together, too fancy. Buir didn’t like him, I don’t know why he even did the tryout for him, the pay wasn’t even that great?”
��Rubbing his left eye until he sees stars, Jaster stares down into the bottle until he can come up with a way to explain core Mandalorian beliefs to a child that had barely a decade of living as one before that, too, had been taken from him. “If Jang’ika took that job intending to come out on the other side, I’ll kiss whatever Vizsla is left.”
Boba’s mouth twists and he kicks his heels against the floor, not waiting for Jaster to hand it to him to grab the tihaar back. “Buir was an idiot,” he says, like the solve to a simple math problem, and Jaster can’t but agree.
He sighs. “Unfortunately, he probably got that from somewhere.”
“I mean, at least Montross didn’t live long enough to end up as the template? Kriffing fuck, can you imagine if the Jedi had had to work with that shabuir’s clones?”
“Maybe the war would have ended sooner,” he muses and accepts the bottle, “surely this Emperor would have tired of his face much sooner than Jango’s.”
“Or the Coruscant Guard would have shivved Palpatine in his sleep and tried to take over the Republic; what’s one betrayal of your leader to another?”
“Then I’d like to think Jango would put him, them, in their place for a third time.”
Snorting, Boba pushes to his feet to, presumably, check on the autopilot. “If buir would have even let it get that far, then I’ll kiss Vizsla.”
-
“Old friend!” Hondo shouts as soon as he sees them, and Jaster winces, nursing his first hangover since his twenties.
“Ohnaka,” he returns, and pretends he doesn’t notice the subtle way Boba brightens as Hondo comes to clap them both on the shoulders.
The old pirate just chuckles and starts to steer them both back across the hangar bay to his latest junk ship. “I heard you died, Mand’alor,” he says casually, like the title isn’t cursed to the ka’ra and back, like it hadn’t been three decades since anyone had dared call someone from his house such a thing so sincerely.
“I did.”
“I found him on Galidraan,” Boba offers. “Is that why you told me to go?”
Hondo scoffs, and Jaster would say he was flustered if he didn’t know him better. “No, I told you to go because Aurra had a job for you, that you seem to have forgotten about in your haste to bring my long lost best friend back to me.”
Boba scowls. “Aurra wasn’t at the meeting place, laandur, it was a kriffing mynock chase and you know it.”
Jaster side eyes his old “friend”, and wonders again about his preternatural... luck in all things pirate-related, despite being a boisterous mess of a man most of the time. If this Aurra had even been on the planet when Boba got there, Jaster will kiss Vizsla twice.
-
Mando’a:
Ka'ra — an ancient Mandalorian story, ruling council of fallen kings, “stars”
ad — “child”, gender neutral
'ika — diminutive suffix, similar to the suffix “ita/o” in Spanish. generally used only by close family and friends
beskar'gam — Armour made of beskar, “Mandalorian Iron” that was actually probably a steel alloy
evaar'gam — lit. “youth armour”, fan name for the interim armour/garb Mandalorians would have worn before building their kit of beskar’gam
buir — “parent”, gender neutral
Cuy'val Dar — “Those who no longer exist”, group of 75 Mando’ade and 25 others put together by Jango to train the clones
aliit — “clan”, “family”
tihaar — Mandalorian strong clear spirit made from fruit
shabuir — an extreme insult, mostly accepted in fandom to be an insult of an individual’s ability to parent (from buir), which is an intrinsic part of Mandalorian psyche and identity
laandur — used here as “weak”, “pathetic”, but is usually used as “delicate”, “fragile”
*in reference to the Mando’a word for the dead/deceased “taab'echaaj'la”, or “marched far away”, best explained in the Mando’a tribute to dead comrades, “not gone, merely marching far away”.
#crispy writes#boba fett#jaster mereel#hondo ohnaka#prompt fill#fanfiction#prequel trilogy#clone wars#jango fett: open seasons#uhhh#angst#boba deserves all of the parents#jaster dies on korda 6 and is kicked almost fourty years into the future: the fic#mando'a#like a lot of mando'a#ask#prompt#anon#this took me weeks and then about three hours#love that hashtag bastard muse#I FORGOT THE MOST IMPORTANT TAG#force sensitive hondo ohnaka
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Death and an Angel part 14.5
Death!Din x Cupid F!Reader
Summary: And it’s unbelievable, truly, that he’s found someone who makes him feel as though he’s flying and falling simultaneously.
Rating: T
Word Count: 3,701
Warnings: angst, dialogue heavy, language, angst, Violence, plot plot plot, did I mention angst? Cuz it’s here
Author Note: Texas weather is no laughing matter and never have I hated snow more than these last few days. This is definitely more of a transition segment so I wrote shorter snippets as a result, but there is some serious plot development nevertheless. The response to last chapter was so amazing I can’t thank everyone enough for all the love and support 💖💖💖
Links to Part 1 and Part 14 and Part 15
Cross-posted on AO3.
Photo Inspiration:
Ahsoka hijacks the Razor Crest as soon as Din teleports her aboard the ship. She pushes Din out of the cockpit, refusing to let him so much as glimpse the coordinates of the destination she inputs into the nav computer. The Oracle hadn’t been kidding when she said she didn’t trust him going alone to rescue his soulmate.
Bo-Katan hadn’t been phased by Ahsoka’s arrival, adapting to her presence with the same ease as a duck to water. However, Din couldn’t help noticing the moment her mask of cool indifference slipped when Ahsoka asked the reaper to stay in the cockpit with her, claiming they had important matters to discuss.
Din climbs down the ladder into the hull, recognizing that the conversation about to ensue is not one he needs to be involved in. Fingers twitching restlessly, he commits himself to checking each of the weapons in his armory, sharpening his vibroblades and loading a set of whistling birds into his vambrace. He’d made a promise to Ahsoka against killing Moff Gideon, but he’d made no vow against scarring the Seraph beyond recognition.
When Din’s finished with him, Gideon will be a warning to the rest of the galaxy what happens if you steal from Death.
He stills at the thrum of satisfaction that runs through his body at the thought of pressing Gideon’s eyeballs out with his thumbs. The darkness within him has grown stronger since he killed Hess and it’s becoming an increasingly harder challenge denying its craving for bloodshed. If not for Ahsoka’s intervention, he would have reaped Xi’an’s soul, breaking another sacred rule. He should feel grateful, but the darkness expresses annoyance instead, upset to have been denied its kill.
There is a thought that has been plaguing the back of his mind, shackled in the same corner as his other doubts and regrets. He once had iron control over his powers and emotions, but now he’s holding onto his human façade by a mere thread. So slowly he hadn’t even been aware it was happening, his darkness has usurped his morality.
He’s meant to be a neutral entity, but when he looks at his reflection in the fresher mirror all he sees is a weapon.
Obsidian orbs have replaced brown eyes. Flawless tan skin has become dissected by lines of ink that once were blue veins.
Darkness is corrupting him from the inside out, making him a slave to the power he once mastered.
And he doesn’t have a fucking clue how to stop it.
~~
Bo-Katan joins him in the hull an hour later. She doesn’t say anything , just leans against the wall across from him, and Din continues cleaning the barrel of his amban rifle as if he doesn’t see her.
The silence isn’t tense or uncomfortable, but he feels her gaze trying to penetrate his helmet. He knows the reaper well-enough to tell there is a question on her mind, but her hesitance to voice it unsettles him. Bo-Katan rarely holds her tongue around him, preferring blunt honesty over sugarcoating, which means whatever is on her mind must be serious.
He bites back a sigh when she starts restlessly shifting in place and pauses his task. “Ahsoka told you,” he says at last.
“That Moff Gideon fucked with our lives?” Bo-Katan snorts humorlessly. “Yeah, she showed me everything.”
“I’m sorry about your sister.”
“Me too. But it’s...good not being in the dark anymore. I needed to hear the truth,” she replies stoically, but the pointless adjustment of her headband betrays her internal strife. There is a moment of pause before she looks at him again. “I heard about your promise,” she says, and it’s not really a question, except that it is.
Din’s fingers tighten around the rifle. “Did she make you swear the same one?”
“No.” Bo-Katan shakes her head. “No, she didn’t.”
He’s not surprised by the answer. He actually thinks he should have expected it, considering the universe has always held him to a stricter standard than other entities.
“Ahsoka made it clear to me that this is something between you, Gideon, and your angel alone. I cannot interfere just like you cannot kill him.”
There is bitter resignation in her tone. He recognizes it because he felt the same when he made his promise to Ahsoka. No one likes being told no when they want something. But this—knowing with absolute certainty Gideon is the one responsible for hurting their loved ones and being told you can’t do anything to avenge them? This is the kind of pain that will linger for years to come as an ache in their bones and a scar over their hearts.
It isn’t fair. But Din’s lived long enough to know the universe never intended life to be that way.
“Can I ask you a favor?” Bo-Katan asks, pulling him out of his thoughts.
He blinks at her, realizing this is the question she’d been withholding since she came down the ladder. Never has she asked him a request before. “What is it?”
“You must separate Gideon from the Darksaber,” she answers, expression one of absolute seriousness. “The Armorer warned my people if the Lightsaber was ever mishandled, it would turn against the wielder by transforming into the Darksaber. Instead of empowering you, it deceives you. Fills your head with delusions until you lose your grip on reality entirely.”
“And you want to spare Gideon’s sanity?” Din asks slowly.
“Of course not. The son of a bitch deserves to be punished for his crimes. Even if I did want to,” her lips curl into a snarl at the thought, “there’s no way of undoing the damage done to his mind. What I want is for the weapon to be returned to the Armorer. She’s the only one who can properly dispose of it.”
“Right,” he agrees quietly. Anything that comes out of the Armorer’s forge is built to last the length of eternity. He could toss the Darksaber into the center of a sun and it’d remain whole and unaffected, waiting to twist the mind of the next wielder. Nodding his head, he assures her, “I’ll take care of it, even if I have to cut off his hands.”
“Good.”
~~
Din paces the length of the hull, each thud of his boots making contact with the metal floor blends with the low hum of the engines. Usually he’d ignore the creaks and groans of his home, but the metallic symphony is the only thing capable of drowning out the thoughts in his head urging him to storm the cockpit and retake control from Ahsoka.
“Pacing isn’t going to make us arrive any quicker,” Bo-Katan tells him, not even bothering to open her eyes as she lounges atop one of his storage crates. “Ahsoka said it will be another hour at least.”
He has a retort ready on his tongue when a voice calls out his name from somewhere beyond the Razor Crest.
“Din!”
Din freezes in place as unexpected, heart-wrenching hope slices through his chest. He knows that voice. It’s his favorite in all the galaxy.
“Death?” Bo-Katan asks, concerned by his stillness. “What’s wrong?”
He tentatively reaches out towards the bond, giving it the slightest of tugs. When he feels the distant flicker of a reaction on the other end from his angel he nearly forgets how to breathe.
“The bond,” he murmurs, voice thick with awe and relief. “I can feel it again.”
Longing fills his chest where the hollowness used to reside now that the invisible block separating them is gone. It wraps around his heart, squeezing so tightly he nearly falls to his knees. Din pulls at the bond again on impulse, possessed by the all-consuming need to see her, to have her at his side where she’ll be safe.
The bond protests the harsh treatment, too weak to physically bring them together across the vast distance separating them. He snarls a curse under his breath, hating being helpless to protect her. It’s unfair, he finds himself thinking for a second time. Unfair how it hurts more now being able to feel her presence compared to when he couldn’t at all.
A paper airplane flickers into existence on the horizon of his mind, flying straight into his hand when he reaches out for it. I can’t leave this place. Not yet, the note says. The words themselves are unsettling, but it’s the strength of the emotions she’s attached that has him reeling with shock. For one crazy, electrifying moment he thinks he’s passed onto the afterlife.
Another note arrives. I miss you, Din. I want to see you so much it hurts. And it’s unbelievable, truly, that he’s found someone who makes him feel as though he’s flying and falling simultaneously.
As he sends a message of his own, never has he been more certain that if anyone can put an end to the darkness inside of him—it’s her.
~~
“The Moff is an expert when it comes to defensive warding,” Ahsoka says as the three of them stand looking up at a canyon wall that extends in either direction as far as their eyes can see. “But even he can’t hide from my sight.”
Din scuffs at the salt-covered ground with his boot, still coming to terms with the fact all this time Gideon’s been hiding out on Crait of all planets. As much as he wants to believe Ahsoka’s right, his powers can’t detect even the barest hint of the Seraph’s presence.
Bo-Katan’s eyebrows arch with skepticism. “You’re sure this is the right place? It’s kind of remote.”
“Perfect for building an army,” Ahsoka replies without missing a beat.
Din exchanges a look with his reaper, realizing this is the first time either of them are hearing about this.
“Gideon has an army?” he asks. “Who—”
“Mercenaries,” she interrupts, turning around to face them. Her blue eyes are distant and cloudy, entranced by a vision. “When I break the warding, all but one will meet the end of their mortal lives attempting to overpower us.”
“All but one? I don’t think so.” Bo-Katan rests her hands deliberately on her blaster pistols. “Anyone who works for Gideon is an enemy in my book.”
“Migs Mayfeld is not to be harmed.” There is steel in Ahsoka’s voice as she blinks back into the present moment.
Din nudges Bo-Katan with his arm when it looks like she wants to continue arguing. The reaper huffs a quiet breath of annoyance, but eventually jerks her head in the tiniest nod of compliance.
Ahsoka grabs her twin sabers from her belt and ignites their blue blades. She handles her weapons with deadly grace, altering her appearance from peaceful Oracle to fierce and cunning warrior. Turning back to the canyon wall, her gaze trails over the red-brown rocks only to pause and narrow at seemingly random points.
Bo-Katan tries and fails to follow her line of vision. “What are you—”
The Oracle leaps into the air with surprising agility, lashing out with her sabers against the rock. Blinding light bursts forth from the point of collision followed by a flickering glimpse of a gigantic metal door.
“—looking at,” Bo-Katan finishes quietly, watching Ahsoka swing herself higher to attack another portion of the canyon wall where the next segment of warding is hidden.
There is something undeniably satisfying about seeing the door materialize as the wardings cloaking it are destroyed. Every precise strike of Ahsoka’s sabers brings Din one step closer to reuniting with his soulmate.
As if spurred by the mere thought of her, fear ripples across the bond like a gust of icy wind, stopping his heart cold. His angel is terrified. Din reaches out as far as the bond will allow in its fragile state, trying to get her attention by pulling at it and shouting her name, but none of his attempts breach the storm of panic.
“She needs me,” he mutters to himself, stepping forward with clenched fists. His vision narrows until all he can see is the door in front of him, an obstacle that must be dealt with. “She needs my help.”
“Wait,” Bo-Katan calls out, but her voice sounds as if it’s coming from thousands of miles away. “Ahsoka isn’t finished with the warding yet!”
If he were capable of rational thought in that moment, he would have heeded her warning. As it is, he summons his power into the palm of his hand, the darkness inside of him crowing in wicked delight. He winds his arm back, preparing to slam his fist against the door, only for a whipcord to wrap around his wrist with an audible zip.
He’s pulled backwards onto the ground, breath knocked from his lungs as he lands with a heavy thud. Bo-Katan appears not a second later and pins him in place by straddling his waist. The darkness is demanding he push her aside, knowing with absolute certainty the reaper is no match against him, and it takes all his strength to wrestle the urge under control.
“Are you out of your fucking mind?” She glares at him, eyes resembling green flames eager to incinerate him.
“I—” he rasps, breathing heavily. His hand starts trembling, a burning itch under his skin. “I can feel her fear. She needs me.”
Bo-Katan blows out a long, frustrated breath. “Well, shit.” She jostles him then, forcing his head to momentarily clear as his helmet smacks the ground. “Look, soulmates are soulmates for a reason, right? I heard it’s like being two halves of the same whole. So if your soulmate is anything like you, she’s not going to give up without a fight. You have to trust she can take care of herself right now. That she’ll be fine.”
Din bristles. Trust is not the issue here. There is no one he trusts more than his angel—not Bo-Katan, not Ahsoka, not even Kuiil. The issue is he’s being asked to deny the instinct to shield her from danger which is woven into every cell of his being.
“She’ll be fine.” The words come out sounding sharp around the edges, cutting his tongue like shrapnel. “Everything will be fine.”
Bo-Katan disconnects the whipcord and rises to full height, apparently satisfied by his agreement. Din pushes himself onto his feet at a slower pace, his hand still shaking as if it's electric. He looks down at it, noticing for the first time the flesh is gone, replaced entirely by shadow. His expression tightens as he observes the change, realizing the black tendrils are slowly creeping up towards his wrist.
An alarm rings out, reverberating off the canyon walls like an explosion. Din’s gaze snaps up just as Ahsoka lands on the ground in a defensive crouch. Now that it's been fully unveiled, the door bears a striking resemblance to ones he’s seen at military fortresses across the galaxy, ridiculously massive to intimidate enemies and impenetrable from outside attacks. It makes sense, he thinks with a scoff, someone as power-hungry as Gideon claiming an abandoned base as their lair. Without the wardings, Din is able to detect the massive number of souls gathering on the other side, resembling vermin crawling over one another in their haste to arm themselves.
He searches for his angel’s soul, even just a glimpse of her bright light, only for his powers to instead encounter a massive cloud of dark, negatively-charged energy within a distant corner of the underground tunnel system. It fills an entire room, prohibiting him from sensing if anyone is inside. There is something strangely familiar about the energy, like he’s encountered its essence before, but he can’t recall the specifics of when or where.
“It’s time.”
Ahsoka’s voice reels his focus back to his physical surroundings. He notices the way her grip on her sabers tightens in anticipation and out of the corner of his eye Bo-Katan withdraws her blasters from their holsters.
The bottom of the door begins to raise with an earsplitting groan, but the mercenaries only wait the minimum amount of time it takes to pass under without hitting their heads to start charging forward.
Every mortal has a beginning and an end just like everything else in the galaxy. These mercenaries are no exceptions, having long sealed their fates when they agreed to accept Gideon’s payment. So when Din’s shadowy hand phases through a man’s chest and tears his heart out of its cavity, staining the white salt under their feet crimson as blood bursts from the vacant hole, Din tells himself he’s simply fulfilling destiny.
He repeats it when he discharges an assault of whistling birds, each one puncturing the throats of each target they encounter with a shrill warcry. And also when he rips a devaronian’s horn out of his head, a fragment of skull and bits of brain matter still gruesomely attached.
Again and again, with each permanently silenced voice and every shattered fragile bone, destiny is fulfilled.
~~
Din would be lying if he said he’s never wondered what it would be like to die. To pass on from this world into a new realm for him to explore. He’s imagined the idyllic afterlife mortals have written poems and novels about, describing it as a blissful safe haven where sorrow and tragedy have no definition because they do not exist. He’s familiar with their opinions of damnation’s appearance, too, as an infernal place of fire and brimstone and screaming.
They were wrong about that.
Damnation is not a distant hell. It is found in an underground lair on Crait.
Instead of flames and sulfur, a Cupid’s blood is split and a soulmate bond is snapped in half.
Instead of screaming, a madman laughs.
“I’ve waited so long for this moment,” Gideon says through his chuckles, hauling himself onto his feet. His voice is an abrasive rasp, as if he’s shredded his vocal cords by screaming. “I’ve had to be patient, wait to find your weakness so I could catch your attention. It’s a shame, really, she had to be the one you fell for. She was quite the little spitfire.”
Din stares at his soulmate’s motionless body, frozen in place. Please, he pulls at his severed half of the bond, resolutely ignoring how cold it feels. Open your eyes, angel. Don’t leave me. Please.
There is no response. Just heartbreaking silence.
“I sense your anger, your hurt, and grief. Those are mortal emotions.” The Seraph grimaces in disgust, then lets out a low hiss when he agitates the wounds on his face. “By living amongst their kind you’ve forgotten your true potential. You are not their equal, Death. You are their superior. Immortals are meant to be better than them. To rule over every aspect of their pitiful lives.”
“I don’t want to rule anyone,” Din says, dragging his eyes away from his angel to glare at Gideon. Both his hands begin to shake as his mind plunges into a gaping abyss of remorse and despair. “I just want a life with her.”
“Even dead, she continues to blind you.”
Din snarls viciously in response. His control is pushed closer to the brink, holding on by mere fingertips, and darkness engulfs the entire room as a result.
The glow of the Darksaber persists, reflecting off his beskar and Gideon’s armor. It reminds him of moonlight, and he thinks for all that Bo-Katan warned him about the weapon’s sinful qualities, she did not mention its beauty. Even Ahsoka’s vision had failed to truly capture its radiance, just as a holovid can never compete with a face-to-face conversation.
His powers are drawn to the Darksaber. The energy it emits matches the one encountered earlier when searching the tunnels for his angel’s aura. This close, there is no ignoring its familiarity, not when his brain feels seconds away from exploding.
“I used to believe love conquers all,” Gideon prattles on, seemingly oblivious to Din’s torment. “I chose it as the Cupid motto because I thought there was nothing mortals cared more about than the health and happiness of their loved ones. Only after our fateful encounter did the Lightsaber reveal to me the truth.”
Lightsaber? Din’s head jerks up to stare at him, biting back a wince when the throbbing in the back of his mind intensifies at the movement. Does Gideon not realize the weapon has transformed?
By connecting Ahsoka’s claim that Gideon didn’t fully understand the consequence of corrupting the Lightsaber with Bo-Katan’s explanation that the Darksaber deceives its wielder, the answer is an obvious one: he doesn’t.
Gideon mistakes Din’s confusion for interest and his lips slowly curl into a smile. “Mors aeterna. It means—”
“Death is eternal.” The translation slips unbiddenly from Din’s lips before he even realizes his mouth has opened.
“There is no one more feared or respected than you. But for what reason? What have you done to earn your reputation?” Gideon demands, spit flying as his anger flares. “You are no more than the universe’s favorite puppet. Mindlessly obedient to its every demand.”
Hearing the truth always hurts, but hearing it from Gideon is especially torturous. Din’s creed to the universe has dictated his actions the entirety of his existence. He never fought against its orders, never thought of his own desires as more important than what it wanted.
Until he matched with his soulmate. She changed his priorities and shifted the center of his entire world by revealing to him even Death could experience love.
There had been no hesitation when he broke his creed for her.
And he doesn’t hesitate breaking Ahsoka’s promise now.
“I just murdered your soulmate right in front of you and you do nothing. Did you ever love her at all?”
“I do.”
Din summons every trace of power and darkness he possesses and combines them together within his core—a volatile, pulsating mass of pure chaos. His beskar armor starts to crack and chip away, unable to withstand the increasing pressure.
He thinks of his angel’s smiling face, the sound of her laughter, how bright her soul shines, and he thinks all those things are gone now. Not even a chance to say goodbye.
“More than anything.”
And Death lets go.
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#death and an angel#my fic#Din Djarin#din x you#din x reader#din djarin x you#din djarin x reader#the mandalorian#the mandalorian x reader#pedro pascal character fanfiction
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It’s Always Been You ~ 147
OUT OF TIME MASTERLIST
IT’S ALWAYS BEEN YOU MASTERLIST
< previous chapter
Word Count: 2,320ish
Summary: The final battle begins....
Notes: You must read Out Of Time in order to understand this. The chapter numbers continue from Out Of Time.
Y/N was lost in the midst of the chaos. Her unconscious body getting caught in one of the lower levels of the rubble. Tony was up first, searching for Y/N. He found the shield and Steve instead.
“Come on, buddy,” Tony urged, kneeling beside his brother-in-law. “Wake up.” Steve groaned, coming to. “That’s my man.” Tony held the shield up. “You lose this again, I’m keeping it.”
“What happened?” Steve asked.
“You messed with time. It tends to mess back. You’ll see.” Tony helped Steve to his feet.
“Where’s Y/N?”
“I was hoping she was with you. FRIDAY?”
“I am searching for her location, boss” FRIDAY responded.
“Please tell me that she’s alive."
“She has to be,” Steve said. “The Stones won’t allow anything to happen to her.”
“I’ve located Mrs. Stark,” FRIDAY announced. “She’s underneath the rubble.”
“Great, where?” Tony pressed.
“Tony,” Steve said, “maybe we need to deal with—“
“Deal with what?! Your sister—my wife is down there in who knows what kind of condition! We—I need to get to her!”
“Boss,” FRIDAY interrupted, “I don’t know if Y/N would see that as the best idea.”
“What?! Why are you choosing now to talk back, FRIDAY?”
“Because Thanos is here. Thor is currently watching him not too far from where you are.” Steve and Tony made eye contact.
“Y/N can protect herself,” Steve told his worried friend. “The she’ll be fine because the Stones need her.”
Tony nodded and the two walked out of the rubble they were in. They found Thor intensely watching Thanos, who was sitting on something not too far off.
“What’s he been doing?” Tony asked.
“Absolutely nothing,” Thor answered.
“Where are the Stones?” Steve questioned.
“Probably somewhere under all this,” Tony responded. “FRIDAY’s looking. All I know is he doesn’t have them.”
“So we keep it that way.”
“You know it’s a trap, right?” Thor said.
“Yeah,” Tony agreed. “And I don’t much care.”
“Good. Just as long we are all in agreement.” Thor stretched out both hands as thunder cracked. He summoned both Stormbreaker and Mjolnir, which he had stolen during the time heist. HIs casual clothes transformed into his armor and cape, with his beard forming into a braid. “Let’s kill him properly this time.”
The three walked down the rubble towards Thanos. All of them were very serious and ready to end this once and for all.
“You could not live with your own failure. And where did that bring you? Back to me,” Thanos stated, as the three heroes slowly moved to surround him. “I thought by eliminating half of life, the other half would thrive. But you’ve shown me that’s impossible. And as long as there are those that remember what was, there will always be those that are unable to accept what can be. They will resist.”
“Yep. We’re all kinds of stubborn,” Tony replied.
“I'm thankful. Because now, I know what I must do.” Thanos stood. “I will shred this universe down to its last atom.” He placed his helmet on his head. "And then– With the stones you've collected for me, create a new one. Teeming with life, but knows not what it has lost but only what it has been given.” Thor began crackling with lightning. “A grateful universe.”
“Born out of blood,” Steve said.
“They'll never know it. Because you won't be alive to tell them.”
And the fighting began.
~~~
Y/N groaned as she came to. Her head was pounding, it had obviously been hit during the chaos. She was breathing heavily as she took in her surroundings. There was a large metal beam trapping her against broken concrete.
“Hello!” She called out. “Is anyone there?”
No response. And she instantly regretted not putting a comms device in her ear. Y/N grunted as she tried to push the beam off of her, failing. Looking up, she studied the rubble barely hanging on above her. She needed to be careful or it was going to completely crush her.
“Use us,” a rough voice whispered to her in her head. “Use us.”
“It has always taken a lot from me to control you,” Y/N responded, aloud. “How am I suppose to do what I have to if I’m weak?”
“You’ll be fine.”
“What the hell am I even supposed to do anyway?”
“When the time comes, you will know.”
“You guys are incredibly unhelpful, you know?” She groaned as she tried to wiggle herself free again, without help from the Stones.
“You are wasting time.”
“Fine!” Y/N huffed.
She closed her eyes and tried to focus on the Stones.
~~~
“Okay, Thor! Hit me!” Tony exclaimed, the back of his suit opening up.
Thor banged his 2 weapons together, each loaded with lightning, and aimed them at the back of Tony’s suit. The Iron Man suit sucked up the energy and he shot it out at Thanos using his hands and body. Thanos twirled his blade really fast to divert the energy. Thor grabbed Stormbreaker and used it to bat Mjolnir to hit Thanos. Thanos used Tony as a shield, knocking him out and away.
“Boss, wake up!” FRIDAY pled.
Steve tried to attack Thanos but was easily shielded away. Thor’s attack was quickly blocked by Thanos’ sword. Thanos grabbed onto Thor and lifts him up by the neck, choking him, before slamming him down and punching him. Mjolnir is flicked away as Thanos relentlessly beats up Thor, throwing him into a tree and socking him before throwing Thor over rubble and socking him again. Thor tried to grab Stormbreaker but Thanos grabbed it and used it against Thor.
Form not too far off, Mjolnir began to float off the ground. Thanos was digging Stormbreaker into Thor, when suddenly Mjolnir flies into Thanos. It zoomed past, stopped, and then flew back the way it came. Both Thanos and Thor looked back in amazement as Steve wields the hammer.
“I knew it!” Thor said.
Frustrated, Thanos kicked Thor to the ground. Steve charged at the Titan, swinging Mjolnir, and hitting him in the face, knocking him down. Steve threw his shield and Thanos deflected. Steve threw Mjolnir to his shield, creating a shockwave and knocking Thanos off his feet.
Steve then threw his shield at Thanos, quickly hitting it back at the Titan again with Mjolnir. He lined his arm up with Thanos to channel lightning his way.
Thanos eventually got the upper hand, removing his helmet. He stabbed Steve’s leg and knocked Mjolnir out of the Captain’s hand. Thanos proceeded to destroy Steve’s shield with his double-bladed Soward and threw him across the battlefield. Steve staggeredly tried to get up.
“In all my years of conquest, violence, slaughter,” Thanos said, “it was never personal. But I’ll tell you now, what I’m about to do to your stubborn, annoying little planet—I’m gonna enjoy it. Very, very much.”
The entirety of Thanos’ army was then summoned to the ground. Upon seeing the army descending onto Earth, Steve slowly got back to his feet. With a fierce determination, he tightened his broken shield to his arm and stood against the army. Alone. Suddenly, a crackling came in on his comm.
“Hey, Cap, you read me?”
Steve stopped and looked around.
“Cap, it’s Sam. Can you hear me?”
A portal began to form behind the Captain.
“On your left.”
Steve looked behind to see the portal on his left side. Three figures stepped through; Okoye, Shuri, and T’Challa, all ready to fight. Sam then zoomed in from above. As he did, dozens of more portals opened up all around the battlefield. Through one of the portals, Doctor Strange appeared, joined by Drax, Mantis, Star Lord, and Spider-Man. Everyone on the battlefield watched in confusion and awe as more and more heroes arrive through the portals from all the corners of the universe.
Giant-Man (Scott) appeared out of the rubble with Rhodey, Bruce, and Rocket. Every one was lining up behind the Captain, all the teams and armies that Strange and the other sorcerers brought in to help. Tony was sitting up, finally coming around from the hit on his head. Suddenly, the ground in front of him began to tremble and crack. He pushed himself back as something blasted through it and into the sky. Upon closer inspection, he realized it was his wife.
Y/N was glowing with the power of the Stones. Each of the colors were circling around her, all six colors clearly defined. She slowly set herself down in front of Tony, the power fading away as she rushed to him.
“Tony! Are you okay?” She worried as she helped him to his feet.
“Am I okay?” He questioned. “You just shot up from the ground. You were glowing!”
“I’m okay. I’m ready to finish this. Once and for all.”
Tony pulled her in for a desperate kiss. Like he was terrified it would be their last. Y/N quickly reciprocated the desperation.
“I love you,” Tony breathed out as he pulled away.
“I love you too,” she responded.
They turned to join the group of heroes. Tony suited all the way up, while Y/N began to channel the Stones.
“AVENGERS!” Steve shouted, everyone gearing up as she summoned Mjolnir. “Assemble.”
Thor made a battle cry, as did T’Challa, and the heroes charged towards the opposing army. Thanos raised his sword towards the Avengers, signaling his army to charge as well. As the two armies collided, everyone short of paired up. Tony and Y/N were working together, keeping each other safe. Steve and Thor were doing the same thing, both switching off weapons. Steve had Stormbreaker in his hand while Thor had Mjolnir.
“No, no, give me that,” Thor said, tossing Mjolnir to Steve and signaling for Stormbreaker. “You have the little one.”
Steve passed Stormbreaker over and the two nodded to each other before running back into the battle. Y/N and Tony had gotten separated. Y/N could sense the Stones and knew she needed to get to them before Thanos did. It seemed that Thanos and his army knew that and were sending their biggest creatures to slow her down.
Despite her trying, Y/N was thrown down, plowing through the ground. She was panting, and groaning in pain. The creature stalked towards her as she tried to get back up. It raised its claws above its head and was just about to ship down on Y/N when someone stepped in-between her and the creature and killed it. Y/N inhaled sharply, still slightly panting, as she took in her hero. Bucky had turned, looking down at her with those eyes she had fallen in love with. But it wasn’t the same anymore. Y/N now knew that she was over him, though he would always have a place in her heart.
“Bucky,” she breathed out.
“Hey, doll,” he smiled softly, helping her off the ground.
“Bucky.”
“Yeah, it’s me.”
“Bucky.” She practically jumped on him, hugging him tightly. He held her close. “We did it… you’re back.”
“I’m back. Though it’s been mere seconds for me.”
Y/N pulled away. The two studied each other’s faces. Y/N was trying to figure out how to say what she needed to. Bucky was studying her, knowing what she needed to say.
“It’s okay,” he whispered. “I kept you waiting too many times. I get it.”
Tears pooled in her eyes. “I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. You’re happy, right? He treats you right?”
“Yes. He treats me like a queen. We have a daughter. Morgan Howard Stark.”
“Howard?” Bucky chuckled lightly.
“Yeah, I was hesitant on it too. But Tony did some pretty good persuading.”
“I’m happy for you. Really.”
“Thank you.”
“Hey! Can you two old people stop catching up and come help us with the fight?” Sam exclaimed over the comms.
“Be right there,” Y/N responded. She shot out her hand to the side, blasting a creature into pieces. “Thanks for the save though, Buck. But I could have handled it.” She smirked before running off.
~~~
Tony was fighting by himself, creatures and one of the Children of Thanos were after him. He was punched at the ground and he was going to get back up when Giant Man stopped on the Child of Thanos. Peter swung in, immediately going to help Tony up.
“Hey! Holy cow! You will not believe what's been going on. Do you remember when we were in space? And I got all dusty?” Peter rambled after both his and Tony’s helmets disappeared. Tony was looking at Peter, trying not to brake out in a total grin. “I must've passed out, Because I woke up, and you were gone. But Doctor Strange was there, right? He was like, "It's been five years. Come on, they need us." And then he started doing the yellow sparkly thing that he does all the time–“
Tony took steps towards the teen. “He did?” He mumbled. “Oh, no.” He opened his arms and pulled the teen into him. “Hold me.”
“What are you doing?” Peter hugged back. Tony slapped Peter’s back and closed his eyes, holding him tighter. “Oh, this is nice.”
Y/N had noticed the two and had allowed them some time while she fought off the army. Finally, she was done. She landed behind them.
“Okay, boys, party’s over,” she commented.
“Y/N!” Peter exclaimed, rushing over to hug her.
“Hey, Peter,” she welcomed him into her arms. “I’m so glad you’re back. Now,” she pulled away, “keep fighting.”
“On it!” His helmet closed and he swung away.
The couple watched before making eye contact.
“We did it,” Tony whispered, coming closer to his wife.
“But it’s not over yet,” Y/N replied. She leaned in and kissed him. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”
next chapter >
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Hi, could you do a story where reader is having a panic attack and scared of letting Loki see them like this? Male reader please? The cause of the panic attack is someone judging them for their weigh. Loki comforting them. Please?
A/N:
It's in an alternate universe were Loki and Tom Hiddleston are in a relationship together, and since Loki is an Avenger they live in the tower. Since Tom himself is being shamed sometimes - which still breaks my heart - I tried to work that into the story. Hope you like this :)
Warnings: hurt/comfort, bit angsty.
Panick attack
‘God he looks like a bean stick, doesn’t he?’ Tony said
‘Haha yes, some people aren’t built for muscles’ Sam chimed in.
That were the only two sentences Tom had heard of the conversation, but it was enough to make him spiral out of control. He had no idea how long they were talking about him, and had no intention to stay and discover how long they would go on. He wanted nothing more than to go into his bed, and cry. One problem, the chance of encountering his very fit boyfriend – with literally the body of a god - was too high. He had to find a hiding place, and fast.
Walking through the hallway he tried to hold back his tears. That unsettling, but very familiar feeling, started to creep in. His stomach felt in knots and he became nauseated. His breathing increased, but he tried to get it under control. His whole body felt tense and his temperature was rising. With no other option, he opted for the toilet of the library. Quickly entering the toilet, he slammed the door behind him and made sure it was locked. Closing the toilet-lit he sat down on the lit. He put his elbows on his thighs and his hands on either side of his head. Now he was locked in an internal war with himself, one that he lost over and over again.
The first battle he lost was with his tears. They were streaming down his face. He tried to close his eyes, bite his lip and tilt back his head, but the tears kept coming. The toilet felt like a hundred degrees and sweat was starting to form on his forehead, his hands already damp and lightly shaking. That was the second battle he lost. He tried to keep the bad thoughts away, because everybody is different. Not everyone wants to have big muscles to show of, he didn’t want to spend all his time at the gym, watching what he ate. He only liked to run, was that so wrong? But the constant ridicule from the people around him was too much. Thoughts that he was too thin, too lean, didn’t look sexy, at least not sexy enough for his boyfriend were swarming through his head. And that was the moment he lost the war.
His breathing sped up and he was inhaling loudly. It was even becoming painful for his lungs, but Tom felt like he couldn’t breathe anymore. Everything around him was spinning. He felt like dying. A knock on the door startled him. God, no not now! He couldn’t let anybody see him, he was too ashamed. He tried to silence his breaths, but it was no use.
‘Who is in there? Is everything all right?’ a familiar voice on the other side of the door said.
No, no no... not Loki. Why? Tom thought. Loki was the last person on this planet that could see him like this. He wanted to tell him to leave, but he couldn’t. He couldn’t even breathe! It felt like he was suffocating.
‘I’m unlocking the door’ Loki said. Tom wanted to protest, but still couldn’t say a thing.
The lock of the door slowly turned. The handle was pushed down and the door opened, revealing a concerned Loki. When Loki saw his panting boyfriend, covered in sweat, crouched inwards on the toilet lit he was shocked. He ran towards him, flicking his wrists to close the door behind him. He got on his knees, in between Tom’s legs and grabbed his hands.
‘Love, what’s wrong? What happened?’ Loki asked full of concern.
Tom just closed his eyes and kept gasping for air. He didn’t want to gasp for air anymore, it hurt too much to do so.
‘Tom, open your eyes. Look at me’ Loki said.
Tom just shook his head. ‘I’m sorry’ ‘I’m sorry’ ‘I’m sorry’ he repeated in a mantra over and over again between the gasps.
‘Tom, open your eyes’ Loki said more sternly.
Tom opened his eyes and looked at his boyfriend through the tears. He kept apologizing, for nothing and everything at the same time.
‘Just breathe, love. In… and out. In… and out’ Loki encouraged while demonstrating his own breathing.
Loki kept looking into Tom’s eyes, rubbing the back of his hands, and breathing with him. It took a while, but Tom stopped apologizing and his breathing was slowing. Now, he felt dread, because he had to tell Loki what happened. He was so scared that Loki would realise he was too good for him, he would for sure leave him. If not now then somewhere in the future. Tom felt cold, and started to shiver. The tears had stopped streaming and his breathing was painful, but even.
‘Are you cold? Do you want to come back to our room?’ Loki said softly.
Tom didn’t say anything but nodded slightly. ‘I-, I don’t..’ he said with a hoarse voice, but Loki shushed him.
‘I’ll teleport us’ Loki said. He helped Tom up for the lit and hold him tightly against him through the spell. Back in their room he still held on to Tom, figuring the spell would make him feel slightly dizzy. After the long hug he sat Tom down on the bed and conjured up a blanket to put around him, hoping he would soon stop shivering.
‘Are you all right?’ Loki asked.
Tom nodded.
‘What happened, love?’
When Tom tried to speak a chocked sob came out. He buried his face in his hands, trying to get away from Loki. Loki put an arm around his shoulder and let him cry in his chest for a moment. He stroked Tom’s hair to calm him down and whispered that everything will be all right. After Tom calmed down again he let him retract just enough to let him explain what happened.
‘It’s nothing’ Tom said a bit sheepishly.
‘That was not nothing’ Loki shot back. ‘Tell me, please’ he added softly.
‘I- ehm.. overheard a conversation between Tony and Sam’ Tom said sadly.
When he didn’t say anything more, Loki decided to push it a little. ‘What were they saying?’ assuming it would be something hurtful about himself. To his surprise, it wasn’t.
‘They were making fun of me.. for not having enough muscles’ Loki heard Tom say in the smallest voice he had ever heard of Tom, making his heart break. He felt Tom tense up and try to hide himself again.
Loki grabbed either side of Tom’s face. ‘Love, to me you are absolutely perfect. There is not a thing I would change. Don’t listen to these two idiots. What do they know? They have to use robotics to even stand a chance during missions’ Loki said.
‘It’s just.. you’re .. you, you know. Godly. And I’m me.. just me’ Tom hesitatingly answered.
‘You’re you, and you’re mine. You’re perfect in my eyes, and I wish you would see yourself like I see you’ Loki said.
‘I’m just afraid that one day you will wake up, see what they mean. Not find me attractive and leave me’ Tom almost whispered.
‘You are by far the most attractive person I ever met. Not only on the outside, but also within. You’re sweet, kind, forgiving and always see the positive side of everything. Too be honest, I wish sometimes to be more like you. And I am the one who is actually afraid that one day you will truly realize the gravity of my past and sometimes current actions, and that you will leave me’ Loki said, for the God of Lies he knew that Tom knew that he was being honest.
Loki smiled a little when Tom snuggled closer against him. ‘You know that I truly love you’ Tom responded. Loki was caressing the back of his boyfriend and the two of them enjoyed a moment of silence.
‘But what if, I want to change?’ Tom said, breaking the silence.
‘What do you mean?’ Loki hesitatingly asked.
‘Maybe, I can work out more?’ Tom said.
‘You don’t have to do that for anyone’ Loki sternly answered. ‘It’s important that you’re comfortable in your own skin, trust me. You will hate every minute of your life if you’re not’ he added sadly.
‘I- I don’t know’ Tom answered.
‘No worries. Take all the time you need. Just promise me that next time you ever feel like this, and have a panic attack. You call me. Day and night, promise?’
‘I promise’ Tom said. Loki grabbed his face again and kissed him deeply. He was relieved to see Tom smile, even if it was a small smile. He could tell from his face that Tom was emotionally drained. So, the rest of the night Loki pampered Tom with tea, chocolates, his favourite movie, and a very comfortable blanket. Tom had fallen asleep halfway through the movie, but not Loki. Loki was thinking about the people that hurt his boyfriend. He wouldn’t kill them, that is what he used to do. But he promised himself that he would hurt them.
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#loki fic#loki fanfiction#loki fanfic#loki marvel#loki mcu#loki laufeyson#loki odinson#loki of asgard#loki oneshot#loki#loki sad#loki angry#loki angst#loki god of lies#loki god of mischief#loki sweet#established couple#loki x tom#loki x tom hiddleston#tom hiddleston one shot#comfort#loki hurt#angst
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