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oddlykilledghosts · 6 months
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please tell writers when you like their stuff!! you don’t know how important and inspiring and motivating it is to hear!! It could just be “this is cool” and that’s it!!!
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oddlykilledghosts · 6 months
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Breakfast At Tiffany’s - Rafe Cameron x reader
Summary: Rafe surprises you with a trip to New York during Christmas, and a stop at a shop you could never afford
Word Count: 3.2k
Pairings: Rafe Cameron x pogue!reader
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Nothing felt real. 
Well, maybe it actually felt a little bit too real. Too good to be true. Maybe falsified by some ancient god for some universal prank. But you didn’t care. You were sitting in the backseat of a taxi with your boyfriend, Rafe Cameron, and life was perfect. Life couldn’t have been more perfect. It was snowing outside, a blaze of white flickering past the window and landing on the cars passing by. A sight you had never seen before, and your eyes glazed over watching the snowfall from outside the car.
You were leaning on Rafe’s shoulder, having been a little sleep deprived lately because of work and trying to find time to spend with friends when you weren’t working, which were both equally stressful. Rafe’s arm was protectively around you, and also radiating heat from inside his jacket. And it felt a little alright to take a break from thinking about those small amounts of stress when you were bundled up next to the Kook.
The other day, when this all began, had started out just right. Perfect sun, no clouds in the Outer Banks, and temperature of low 50s; the coldest you liked in your hometown. You had stayed over at Rafe’s the previous night, and he had pretty much insisted you do so. Unfortunately, you could never really say no to your boyfriend. But Tannyhill was also big and glorious and you never minded staying there instead of The Cut. 
After you had begun dating, it was typical of you to stay there most nights, with Rafe’s room becoming a second hideaway from the world. His room had its own bathroom, where you had showered and cleaned up before the day had started. And you kept your own things there; strawberry scented shampoo, face wash, a toothbrush, and a few other necessities. Rafe had made his space your own. The only problem was trying not to let Ward in on your little secret. You were Ward’s favorite of the pogues, only when you weren’t a group of meddling kids, but you doubted he would approve of your sleepover situation. And if he did know of it, he didn’t say anything. 
When you came out of the shower, Rafe was sitting on the bed looking at his phone, not letting you in on any simplicity of his plan. You were drying your hair with one of his white towels when he spoke up, all nonchalant-like, “You like New York, right?” His voice hid a certain nuance to it, but you couldn’t tell what it entailed.
An eyebrow shot up on your face as a laugh exited your mouth, a jingle Rafe could never get out of his head, “Like, geographically?” 
Rafe shook his head, his eyes looking up from his phone. His gaze softened when it landed on you, a gentle expression on his features. “No, like, visiting.” He shrugged where he was laying down, and pulled himself up to a sitting position to get a better look at you. His eyes were sparkling, keeping a secret to themselves.
You laughed again, not sure where he was going with this, “You very well know I’ve never been outside of North Carolina before.” You shrugged, "Can't afford it.” The truth was, you couldn’t remember if you had told Rafe about wanting to visit New York. Especially when you were younger, you would dream about living in the city. It didn’t always sound like you, as you were now an avid surfer and got tans upon tans on the beach at every opportunity. Plus, saving turtles with Kiara was always on your mind. You couldn’t very well do that in the confines of a concrete jungle. But the dream was still there, just not tangible.
“Y/N, would you like to go to New York?” Rafe’s smile peeked out from an unfortunately unsuccessful attempt to hide. You stopped trying to dry your hair. Normally, you didn’t love when Rafe showered you with gifts. But Rafe loved it, and did so at every opportunity. It was like if Rafe had all this love to give, if he could land it anywhere, it would solely be on you.
You shook your head, “No- I mean yes. But you can’t. I mean, Rafe, it’s like-”
“Y/N, it’s Christmas, please just say yes.” Rafe's eyes were so soft, melting into you. His voice was so sweet when he talked, as if he really believed you would turn down the gift and was hoping with all of his might that you would really take him up on it. You had turned down his gifts and generosity before, but that was so early into your relationship that it felt like ages away now. The real problem was, Christmas was the one exception. You loved everything about the holiday. The lights. The gifts. The tree. The music. Everything. And you had never really seen snow before. Had it snowed in New York recently…you were somewhat tempted to get out your phone and check even before answering your boyfriend. Snow. Did you enjoy the cold? Not always. But it could be something new. Something inspiring.
You looked at Rafe, trying to decipher whatever plans he had for the two of you by marking the constellations of his face. A line here, a dimple there. One faded freckle. And inside it all was a loving boyfriend. One you knew wanted the best for you. Only if that’s what you wanted too.
So you said yes. And now you could never believe you did. The Rockefeller tree. The shop windows on 5th avenue. Even your hotel was in the Christmas spirit. Wreaths were up. Halls were decked. It really felt like Christmas. And it was more than you could have ever asked for.
You would never complain about your life back home, not at all. But to really experience it all like this was magical. It was something out of a dream. Like one of those children’s books about a snow day.
Finally, you and Rafe stepped out of the cab, Rafe stopping just for a second to pay the man behind the wheel. You were stopped at Fifth Avenue, a very “Rafe” place to be (as you had decided in your mind). There was nothing spared here, and the bustling of bodies was new to you. Stuck in your mind was the thought of a tourist like you getting trampled so you hung onto Rafe’s arm for support as you walked. 
Snow fell on your nose and your eyelashes causing a blurry sight. You’d never experienced snow before. Well, New York City wasn’t the best place to make snowmen and have a snowball fight, but experiencing it this way the first time was alright to you and just as special. 
Rafe pulled you into a coffee shop, allowing you to be in awe of the city for a moment. You wondered if he had been before, surely Ward had taken him either on business ventures or family vacations. He knew his way around well enough, he didn’t seem like just some OBX boy making it up as he goes for the first time in this type of city.
“Coffee first?” You asked, not sure where this particular stop of the day was leading you. 
The first stop of the day had actually been waking up at your hotel, which wasn’t that far from where you were now. Rafe had scheduled ahead of time, gotten you both a flight with great seats, and started the trip off particularly great. When you found this all out though, you initially pouted unconvinced by Rafe’s confidence that you were going to say yes. Just another way he gets ahead of himself because of you.
When you walked into the shop - a fun place called Ralph’s, you pushed some hair behind your ear. You were wearing a hat and a big coat to fend off the cold and your hair kept getting in your face. The hat was also a little itchy, but you didn’t tell that to Rafe who had thought you looked so cute bundled up.
“World’s best cup of coffee,” Rafe joked, giving you a squeeze of your hand as the two of you stood in line. He was referencing a quote from a movie the two of you had watched together to get in the Christmas spirit; Elf.
You rolled your eyes as you remembered that you wanted a cup of New York coffee. That scene had sparked an inspiration. World’s best or not, coffee kept New York upright. It was just a small thing that he had noticed and remembered. How much of what you said now lived permanently in Rafe’s brain?
When you got to the front of the line, Rafe ordered you your signature caffeinated drink and a croissant, although you weren’t hungry. 
“Next stop?” Rafe asked into your ear as you were leaving, his lips forming a smile. It was nice to see him in such a good mood it almost surprised you to see him act so carefree.
Once you were out, back into the cold, your grip on your boyfriend hardened. “And what would that be?”
“It’s a surprise.” He replied.
“No really tell me.” You pulled at his coat sleeve but he kept walking, dragging you along with him.
“We’re almost there, Y/N. Trust me.”
You leaned into Rafe, taking his word for it and sipped your drink as you went along, people watching everyone on the crowded street.
_________________
You had closed your eyes against Rafe’s sleeve for a bit before you stopped, that exhaustion from work and hanging out one to many late nights with the pogues taking over. You were glad your boss had been forgiving enough about the trip, as you had saved up sick days in advance for emergencies like this (this was a Christmas emergency) and were glad for the time off but you still needed a nap. Maybe on the next taxi drive.
Rafe had to shake you from your almost-sleepwalking-endeavor, “Y/N, you might want that croissant now.”
“Mhnm?” You hummed, content with the smell from Rafe’s coat (polo cologne and fresh laundry as well as that distinct ocean-y smell that came from living so close to the beach).
Shaking your head from any notion of sleep, you opened your eyes, and you gave Rafe a look. This is not what you had envisioned. It wasn’t some New York tradition or small town deal. Well, what it was was Tiffany and CO’s flagship store, huge and towering over the two of you as snow passed by the well-lit windows. 
You couldn’t help but smile at the store. So beautifully big and gleaming with lights and decorations of the jewelry inside. You would’ve never taken yourself here, and you knew that was most of the reason why Rafe had. You had watched Breakfast at Tiffany’s not that long ago and told Rafe how much you loved it. The characters. The glitz and glam. What the story really meant. 
Rafe handed you the croissant, “Ready to remake a scene?”
You now understood what Rafe was doing. You were going to be his Audrey Hepburn. His “Holly Golightly”. The classic croissant and coffee combo, her breakfast that she ate in the first scene of the movie.
Going up to the window, you let him take your picture as you sipped your drink and took a bite, laughing as you did so. “You know, we’re far from those characters.” You mention, trying to get back to reality.
“We’re obviously not sex-workers, Y/N.” Rafe says with a deadpan, and you’re surprised he’s seen the movie as you surely didn’t make him watch it. Maybe Wheezie did when she was going through her past decades phase a few months ago. As he talked, snow got stuck in his hair, you think it makes him look cute and you bite back a soft laugh.
“I know,” you smile, taking another bite of the treat. There was some chocolate inside, sweet and just right. “If I had a cat, I’d definitely name it.”
“But?” Rafe knew you too well to drop the conversation.
“I did fall in love with it. That nothing bad could ever happen in a place like Tiffany’s.” You took a step towards your boyfriend and used his color to pull him into a light kiss. “You’re like that for me.”
Rafe smiled against your mouth, “Because I’m rich?”
You shrugged, a playful smirk on your lips, “Want to go in?” You asked, having too much fun with this. “Just to look.” You clarified.
Rafe nodded his head, a mastermind at work behind those eyes, “Ladies first.”
_____________________
The thing was, you weren’t much for luxury stores, so this was a very new experience for you. A doorman stood by one of the doors and ushered you in, and you blushed as he opened the door for you as it’s action usually only Rafe does for you. You smiled at him as he both of you passed, and grabbed Rafe’s hand (one of your many ways to comfort yourself) as you entered the store.
The store itself was huge, ceilings going up and around, four floors all open to retail. The first floor featured cases of the most blindingly pretty diamonds and jewelry you had ever seen. Sparkles washed over your eyes as you pulled Rafe to either side of the store, looking with delight at everything offered. Every now and again, a worker would ask if you needed help, but you assured them you were only looking before Rafe could interject.
All of it was decorated with Tiffany's version of Christmas. Christmas cards and art and wreaths. The color red. Tiffany Blue. A tree here and there.
There was a time here and there where you could feel Rafe’s eyes on you, his smile widening at your awe. So in love with you that even watching you enjoy something was enough of a show for him.
By the time you had traveled to each floor, you felt very pleased with your visit. You and the pogues would’ve never come here on your own, let alone able to afford anything in its walls. But Rafe still had a surprise up his sleeve, just for you. 
When you came back to the first floor, Rafe stopped you from going out the door. His hair was now damp from the melted snow but his nose was still a little reddened by the cold. You weren’t sure it was that appropriate to kiss him in a store like this, but you wanted to because he looked so much like the person you loved more than anything, just fresh and new from the cold. He held out his hand to you again, and pulled you close before exiting the store. “I want you to pick one.” He whispered in your ear, not quite letting you pass the threshold and leave.
“What?” A shiver went up your back, causing goosebumps to appear on your arm under your coat. You were sure Rafe was kidding, and also not sure at the same time. He went a little extreme when it came to you, so this was no mistake. He had planned this. 
“Y/N, please just pick one.”
You turned to face him, heat steaming in your cheeks, “Rafe I can’t do that.”
He smiled, “Yes you can.” Then at your pout of pure utter ‘I’m a pogue and I can’t take expensive gifts’, he added, “Let’s just look again. Try something on. For me.” 
As you persisted, Rafe just got more and more convincing. It was easy to fall into his traps. He was tall and charming and knew all of your tricks as well as his own.
When you perused the glass cases again, Rafe flagged down a sales associate to help you. Anxiety coursed through you, you had never done this before… let alone spent this much money on something other than bills. But there was something so calm and casual about Rafe here, like he knew how it worked. 
But you also did want to be pampered a little, give into Rafe’s love for you, even for just a moment.
Rafe picked a few items out, but only after you had shown interest. He was letting you take the reins. Of course, you cringed when they said each of the prices, but Rafe covered it casually and had no worries about how much the cost would be. You tried on a few necklaces and bracelets, weighing the options. You felt so glamorous looking in the mirrors and seeing the jewelry on. But there was one that you loved. That you couldn’t take your eyes off of. But it felt like too much to ask. Of course, the only problem was how Rafe already noticed you eyeing it. It was helpless to think you were going to leave the store, with Rafe as your boyfriend, empty handed.
Rafe side-eyed you as the sales associate walked away for a moment to fetch something Rafe had asked to see, “What are you thinking?”
“I’m thinking it’s Christmas and you don’t have to do this,” You put your hand on top of his, his skin was warm and cozy and his gold signet ring glinted under the lights.
“Hmm, I’m thinking it’s Christmas and you deserve this. Y/N you work so hard, let me do this-” The sales associate returned and opened up the box to reveal what you had wanted, but not said. 
“How much is-” You began to ask, already regretting your decision to let this happen.
“Don’t tell her, it’s a gift.” Rafe interrupted, his smile so charming you were sure even the sales associate was falling into his trap.
You glared at him, but tried it on. And you felt good wearing it. It glinted just like Rafe’s ring in the light, and it looked so good in the mirror. You wanted to scold Rafe, but this was one of the first things you’ll probably have forever and you didn’t want to rob yourself of that. Especially not when it’s connected to someone you loved so much.
“What do you think?” You asked, showing it off to Rafe.
Rafe gave you a look, and you sighed with a smile and turned to the sales associate, “We’ll take it.”
________________________
When you were walking out of the store, you grabbed Rafe’s hand again and pulled him out, almost nervous that he would be tempted to buy you more. You had already gotten one blue box that day, you didn’t need Rafe going especially crazy. But between you, it felt like Christmas. You had gotten an out of this world gift, you were in New York with the love of your life, and you still had more to do.
You turned your head to look at Rafe while you walked, not really in the mood for a taxi, “What’s next?” You asked, eyes ablaze with that look you always got on Christmas morning.
“So now you like my surprises?” Rafe asked, squeezing your hand. 
“It’s Christmas, I can give in a little.” You squeezed Rafe’s hand back, and went off into the wintery New York city.
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oddlykilledghosts · 6 months
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Ahhhhhh can i request one for jj?? Don't you think we need more jj in this world? 'Cause i think we do <3
Kook!reader asks jj if he needs help cleaning their boat (because she has a crush on him obviously), he harshly dismisses her but she looks upset so he breaks his harsh exterior and fluff fluff fluff
Need Any Help? - JJ Maybank x reader
Summary: You, having a crush on JJ, want to be around him. What better than a day when his boat shows up broken down on your side of the island?
author’s note: so sorry for my requests coming so late! I hope you still enjoy it!
Also I know almost nothing about boats so if you do, please ignore all of my inaccurate information
Word Count: 1.5k
Pairings: JJ Maybank x kook!reader
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The sun was blazing against your skin as you lingered around your dock. You were wearing jean shorts and your favorite bikini, having left any resemblance of a shirt back at your house at the shore. Sweat bubbled against your skin, leaving a sort of dewy look against your arms and chest. Lately the weather had been nice, but a little too hot for your taste. And yet your parents still wanted you to get outside and enjoy the sunshine. It was here now that you were trying to tan, but you had put your shorts back on after getting bored, and also after a few passing boats had gone by. You were looking at your phone, trying to figure out whether or not to text Topper to pick you up in his new boat. He had bragged about it the days before, and while you weren’t necessarily a boat person, it would be better than sitting alone any longer. Yes, you were bored enough to talk to Topper, who you never really bonded with that much. But your best friend Sarah was dating him, and that meant you spent a lot of time together whether you liked to or not. But he had nice boats, and you did like a boat ride. 
It was getting to be around that time that you were ready to summon your best friend and her boyfriend when a familiar boat pulled up close to your dock. It had written on the side in white paint the words HMS Pogue. You didn’t think the boy noticed you as he tied up his boat across from you, smoke slowly piling up from the engine. But you knew him. It was JJ Maybank, a pogue from The Cut. You knew him well. Your heart thudded against your chest, not knowing whether or not to announce your presence. Pogues and kooks didn’t always mix, and they both tended to make each other angry. You also happened to have, oh, just a tiny little insignificant crush on him. 
But because you have a brain, and didn’t want to scare him, you said, “Hey.” And started walking toward the end of the dock where he presides. You forgot about the fact that you weren’t wearing a shirt, but since it was summer and you were in your hometown of the Outer Banks, you didn’t think it mattered much. 
He looked up at you momentarily, seemingly unconvinced you were of importance as he started struggling to see what was wrong with his boat. “Hey.” He said, not really caring that he was the one at your dock and he was interrupting you and not the other way around. 
You didn’t really have anything else to do, but suddenly you were alone with JJ Maybank. Yes, JJ Maybank was ignoring you. But it was progress. You scooted yourself to the end of your dock and let your legs dangle off the end. You hoped your tan would cover up your blush, as this move made the proximity between the two of you much smaller. “Do you need any help?” You asked innocently, your voice soft and shy. 
“Not really.” He said without looking at you. His fingers were working on something in the engine but you couldn't see what it was. His hands worked fast and nimble, like he had done this many times.
“Well, how many times has your boat broken down like this?” You asked, trying to insert yourself into the situation in a hope to help. Your dad had plenty of extra parts or engines that could easily replace JJ’s faulty one, but you didn’t want to say it outright as it could sound similar to a Topper brag. 
“Really, Y/N, it’s none of your business.” JJ’s voice was gruff, seemingly frustrated. At the very least, you were just glad he remembered your name. You’d met on a few occasions, and you had fallen fast for his smile and his stupidity at parties, but you never really knew if he remembered you. 
“Well we have some extra-”
“Just fuck off, Y/N, I don’t need a Kook to try and tell me what I’m doing.”
A stab to your heart, you sat stunned for a moment while JJ went back to work. Rarely had you expected JJ, of all people, to talk to you that way. You got that he had a rough boy exterior but you could expect this from Rafe…not from a boy you had some silly crush on. Because that’s what it felt like now. Silly and limp and meaningless. The blush on your cheeks reddened, crawling down to your neck. 
You started to get up, but suddenly your legs felt like jelly, all numb in the knees. The nerves traveled down your legs causing you to slip and fall straight into the water. With nothing to hold onto, you fell with brunt force into the ocean. At first you were stunned again, then embarrassed, and when you reached the top of the water there was an arm reaching for you from above the depths. You took it happily, as the air from your lungs had been pushed out when you landed in the water. When you reached the surface you took gulping breaths like you had never experienced it before, climbing onto JJ’s boat and positioning yourself as far away as possible from the boy.
“I don’t have a towel to give you if that’s what you’re waiting for.” He said without looking at you again, however you noticed the sleeve of his shirt was now wet from when he pulled you from the water.
“Oh shut it, JJ.” You were formed into a little ball, your arms holding your knees to your chest. You used to be afraid of the ocean as a little kid and as embarrassing as this whole thing was for you, you just wanted to go cry in your room like you were eight again like when Rafe had called you mean names growing up.
“Oh, she remembers my name.”
When you didn’t respond, it was then that JJ looked at you. Your hair wet against your cheeks, droplets of water collected on your arm as the sun shone down on his boat. You looked utterly pathetic and upset, and he knew he was the cause of it. He turned away from the engine and crawled over to you, sitting next to you at the edge of the boat. 
JJ adjusted his hat, one that you had seen him wear many times and put his arm close enough to touch yours. “The engine’s been giving me trouble for a while. That’s what you were asking right?”
You nodded, not wanting him to see how much his comments had hurt you.
“Well, you see. John B- do you know John B?” You nodded again. “Well John B’s dad gave me this engine and if I get rid of it, or get another. It’s just not the same. So I fix it, every now and again.”
You put your chin on your knee and turned your cheek to look at JJ, “That’s stupid.” You say, but it made you smile that he cared so much about it. 
“Yeah well, I’m a stupid guy.” JJ furrows his eyebrows, like there was something deeper to his words. You knew what people thought of him, that he was a little reckless and carefree. But it didn’t make him stupid. 
You let go of your knees, still in a puddle of water that you brought onto the boat. “It’s going to crap out on you one day.”
“I think that day is today.” JJ looks at you, his eyes stop at yours for a few seconds before looking away. You never noticed before but JJ rarely looked at you harshly, he rarely looked at you at all. 
“Why do you do that?” You ask. 
“Do what?” He says that edge back in his voice, as if you’re accusing him of something heinous. 
“You don’t look at me.” You grabbed his arm and pulled him closer. “Just look at me.”
He turned his head and your heart stopped short, “Well, you look pathetic.”
“Just what every girl wants to hear.”
“No I mean, you do. You fell into the water and that was-”
“Embarrassing.”
“Yes.” His adam's apple bobbed up and down while he swallowed, “But you also look gorgeous sitting there, and I’m trying to keep my cool.”
“Your cool? Man, I just-” You stopped yourself, not wanting to give away any bit of how much you had been crushing on this boy. “Thanks for helping me out of the water.”
“Couldn’t let you drown.”
“I wouldn’t have drowned.”
JJ smirked and squinted his eyes at you, “Never knew Kooks could swim.”
You scoffed, “You’re just making up bullshit at this point.”
“Maybe I am.” His hands were centimeters from yours. If you just nudged your pinky your hands would be touching. You sat for a second looking at them too long when JJ moved his hand over yours. His skin was hot like a furnace but it even felt nice in the warm weather. 
“Let me help fix it, we have spare parts.” You said, and when you turned your head up and away from your hands JJ was already looking at you.
“We could give that a try.”
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oddlykilledghosts · 6 months
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I Want You To Like Me - Rafe Cameron x reader (Part Four)
Summary: You're a pogue by choice, kook from birth. The friendship that you have with the other pogues is undeniable, no one questions their loyalty for you or your loyalty to them. So when a certain King of the Kooks takes interest in you, it's only right to turn him down. Right?
author’s note: taking some love triangle action into account this chapter! More Rafe as well! I want to thank everyone who has liked this story so far. When I started this fic I was in a rut with writing and seeing everyone enjoy it helped me out of that rut so I love all of you!!
also I'm so sorry if this is bad
Word Count: 5.5k
Pairings: Rafe Cameron x reader, John B x Sarah Cameron, platonic!Pogues x reader
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And suddenly you were in the bathroom, wearing Rafe’s t-shirt (not that you had done anything other than claw at each other some more), and were stressing about making a public appearance at the Island Club together. Your parents weren’t very close with the Cameron’s. At least not anymore. Not after Rafe’s behavior got more noticeable. Drinking, drunk driving, the not so discreet drugs. When Ward tried to play it off, your family decided that until Rafe straightened out his behavior that they should hang around more respectable people. Which had kind of worked out for you, as that was around the time you and Kie had split from Sarah. Your family and Kie’s found that as a reason to spend more time together, as they were amongst the few Kooks who tried not to be pulled into dramatics. But the split from the two families had caused a bigger rift than intended. Sarah had felt ages away afterward when usually you were only as close as a short arm length from each other; just enough to pull someone quickly into a hug. During this time, Rafe had escaped your mind. You had wanted to believe that you too didn’t put up with him, when deep down you wanted to.
Ward doesn’t like to be the one scorned, so he would be plainly political about his feelings. Softly concealed disapproval. But you could see your parents head straight for the fact that you would be even interested in someone they found so insufferable, the “'bad boy' of the island”. Not that you could do anything to help those feelings at this point.
But those thoughts were both enough to cause some anxiety. 
The Island Club was never a place you wanted to go to yourself either. It was always just family dinners or hauling your ass over there to bother JJ during his long shifts when you knew he would be losing his mind. When you had the pogues, it just never ended up being a safe place for you as it did for most of the Kook community. The Chateau, that was your safe place. With John B drooling and drunk on the hammock and Pope reading out by the dock. 
Rafe knocked once on the door. “Y/N?” 
You looked at yourself in the mirror. Your hair was tousled a little from being on the bed, but otherwise you still looked fine. Kiara’s borrowed chokers shone against your tan. Were you the type of girl people expected to see with Rafe Cameron? Did it matter? Being half pogue never felt right in those circles, as if someone was always staring at you. You took your fingers and started fiddling with your hair, putting back misplaced pieces. There was always an expectation in being a Kook, never one with being a pogue. 
You sighed, you wanted this to be easy. This was your first date with Rafe Cameron. But here there were ghosts of distances that used to not exist. It was odd that this rift was created in the first place, like a separation that didn’t need to be previously crossed. Not that long ago had you been a full fledged Kook. But it had been so easy to settle into the pogue lifestyle, surfing, working, the occasional bit of smoking that wafted from the Twinkie’s doors…it felt right. This was somehow so all unfamiliar and bits of hazy memories seemed to mix all into an unappetizing flavor. 
No.
It doesn’t matter. You’re doing this. Rafe, somehow in the middle of everything, felt right to you right now too. That’s what mattered. 
Rafe knocked again, and in a louder voice asked, “Y/N/N, are you okay in there?”
The fact of the matter was, just as it was getting a little too hot and heavy for a first time romantic reunion you had hit the brakes and told Rafe you had to go to the bathroom. Mood killer, yes. But it had given you enough time to decide that you actually did in fact want to go to the Island Club, but also enough to know that you were slightly ill prepared to do so, especially as you looked down at yourself in the reflective silver.
You opened the door back to Rafe’s room to see him waiting outside the door, still shirtless, a fist raised to knock again. He looked surprised at your reentrance, as if he had expected you to climb out of the window instead and climb the two stories down from his room. This was an image you could see versions of your previous self attempting in efforts to evade the boy; maybe in another universe.
You smiled slightly, a small smirk forming just so softly on your features at the sight of this boy that you had pined over at fourteen. 
“What?” Rafe’s eyebrows furrowed in that same familiar pattern at the sight of you. He was hiding a smile too behind his usual demeanor of harsh lines and toughness he had garnered because of his father. You wanted to smooth down his face, letting him just be free with you. His hand hanging in the air suddenly was against your cheek and Rafe was pulling you back into him again, as if he couldn’t hold on another second away from you. The tension in his shoulders lifted slightly when he was close enough to you, his mouth on yours. 
You kissed him back easily, as if so much had changed from the time that Kiara and John B had dropped you off. It was also easy to want to pull him back on top of you and continue where you left off, but it was also astute in your mind that you did not want to be a King Kook hookup and end up as just another ventured conquest in the little Kook black book of misadventures.
Pressing your hands against the boy’s bare chest you parted yourself from Rafe, just far enough to look him in the eyes. “Hey,” Was all you could get out. It was odd seeing him again like this, after a couple years of hating him along with the pogues. You thought back to those talks you had with Rafe. Even having to share a tent with him and Sarah on a camping trip. Or sneaking out to go on the balcony while Sarah was asleep to find some peace and ending up with Rafe outside and talking away the hours covered beneath the inky black sky. Snide remarks. Wandering eyes. Why hadn’t you seen this before? 
“Hey.” He replied.
You wanted to stay here, where it felt like you only had the two of you to deal with and not the judgment filled stares of kooks and pogues alike. But you also had more important matters, like your discarded clothes on the floor that were more appropriate to wear at the Island Club than just Rafe’s shirt, but still reeked of pogue affiliation. You leaned close to his face to tease him and whispered against his skin, “I need clothes.”
Rafe chuckled lightly and you felt his chest move with the small laugh, “I’d bet you look better with none at all but-”
You pulled away with a slight astonished smile and a playful gasp escaped your lips, “I meant for the Island Club.” You chided, squinting your eyes at him, already familiar with Rafe’s playboy tendencies.
Rafe rolled his eyes, “An offer to skip it and stay the day in here with the promise of not needing clothes is appearing-” At your look of disapproval he kept going with, “and now disappearing with the fact that we can most definitely get you clothes.”
_______________________
You got dressed back into your clothes from earlier, hesitant to give Rafe back his shirt but eventually caving as you watched him pull it over his head. The smallest little movement of his seemed to pull you into a heartbeat frenzy all of a sudden. And you liked seeing him wear the shirt that you had shared, like you knew it now belonged to you partially too. You had plans to steal it when you could at the next convenience.
His plan was to grab some clothes from Sarah’s room but you were quick to remind him of the fact that Sarah would hardly like an ex-friend to go through her things, let alone because said ex-friend was going on a date with her brother. He somehow disagreed, with a typical saying Sarah hated…that she “would never hurt a fly”. Sarah mostly hated it because it insinuated she also couldn’t fend for herself, though that must be because of deeper familial issues.
So it was decided that you’d head back to the Chateau. You had already checked with Kie that no one would be there, aimly the Pogues (but who else?), before getting yourself situated in Rafe’s car again.
When you got in, a wave of the past day had washed over you, refreshing somehow like a wave you dive under in the ocean when you just can't shake the heat. Ah, the location of the first kiss. Nothing about it had changed. It still smelled like Rafe’s cologne and the seats were still the same. But now you were not Pogue and Kook, you were Y/N and Rafe. This somehow was both safer and more dangerous. A road not yet taken. A road not yet known.
When you got to the Chateau, Rafe stayed in the car a few extra seconds, and somehow you knew he was nervous to get out. As if he too knew this was enemy territory as much as crashing a Tannyhill party had been for the Pogues and you. You turned to this new person in front of you and raised a white flag, “What? You scared?” You chided. 
Rafe grumbled something under his breath, something you couldn’t make out, and then said “No.” and got out of the vehicle.
It was so easy for you to exist at the Chateau that Rafe was blazed in an uncomfortable glaring hue. You weren’t sure he’d ever seen John B’s house this close. Closer than the driveway that is. Had he been here before the night he dropped you off? You didn’t know and didn’t inquire to ask as you figured an inquisition would trigger more alarm bells in Rafe’s head while being in the pogues domain.
“Rafe,” you coaxed, offering up a hand, “It’s a house. Relax. No one is here.”
Rafe let out a breath and followed you up to the porch.
You found the key easily, it was hidden in its usual place. JJ had actually hidden it and sworn the other Pogues to secrecy, so there was a hint of guilt as you let Rafe look over your shoulder as you found the spare. In the pogue’s world, everything was sacred. You didn’t have much but each other, and that’s what counted. You didn’t know how close Rafe was with his friends or if it was the same, but you’d doubt he would go against them for you. But then again, you doubted the fleeting remains of feelings you had thought were nothing over the boy you were with at the very moment…so who knows. But there was still just that pinprick in your mind that he wouldn’t give up Kook secrets so easily as you would with the pogues. Call it trusting easily, but you might get in trouble with your friends later for rocking between enemy lines. Actually, you already were in trouble for the most part.
“Home sweet home,” You said, pulling Rafe inside. “Don’t touch anything.”
Rafe looked at you pointedly, “it’s not like I won’t be able to pay to replace anything I break.” 
This was an absolute and obvious fact so you responded, “Oh I’m sure you could.” You gave him a smug look, “What about sentimental value?”
Rafe thought for a moment and you couldn’t tell if he was joking or not, “That I could not replace.” He pouted a bit and looked around the room, as if thinking of what could possibly be of sentimental value in the home. Your response, if he asked, would be everything. Every little thing. Especially with your stuff intermingled through the place, it just felt special all mangled together.
You let out a sigh, though you liked that Rafe was being honest for once. “That’s what I thought. Keep your Kook hands to yourself.” You took a step towards him, waving your finger accusingly.
“I thought we were past labels, darlin’.” Then there was that damn smile. Not one ounce of chivalry was inlaid in it, all of it was dark edges and misconceptions. It pulled you in more than you wanted to realize. With Rafe, there was an element of being bad. Of being with the bad guy. And somewhere in you, you liked that. Maybe deep down, you didn’t want to believe that, but it was there and it didn’t feel like hiding that much longer.
You rolled your eyes, suddenly realizing how close the two of you had found yourselves as you talked, and blushed. A habit that had been newly formed whenever Rafe got close to you like this. You pushed his chest away, walking back towards the guest room where all your belongings waited for you.
Rafe was already dressed. He smelled like sweet pine and musk, but also the ocean, and you wanted to sink into him. He wore a polo and some slacks, but it was nicer than any guy had tried in a long time. There was a part of you that hoped and figured it wasn’t going to be that fancy anyway. 
When you got to your room you thought you were going to panic, picking out outfits was never something you had quite delved into. Kie was always there to help. Only a FaceTime away if on Figure Eight, and usually right outside the door already if you were at the Chateau. Sarah was really the mastermind, she could pick things out in seconds that you would’ve never approved of yourself that looked amazing when on. And there was that ache when you thought of her, like a yearning you could never quite hold onto. It was nice seeing her with John B the other night, but also odd. You wondered if you’d ever get the chance to reconcile. Now with Rafe, well he complicates things.
But you put your mind together and thought about your best friends, ex or otherwise, and tried to put together a dress and some jewelry that complimented you. The real you. Not just as a pogue or a kook. 
So you took off Kiara’s chokers, a hard decision as they had been a part of your daily strength and it was hard to part with them, and you put on your pearl necklace you had gotten as a sweet sixteen present from your parents. It looked nice against your tan, and though you didn’t wear it often it was one of your favorite pieces you owned. Which was why you took it to the Chateau. Not one of your best decisions as most things get lost or misplaced in the pogue haven, but you wanted it close to you. It was like a part of your Kook heritage, like saying some part of you will always be a Kook. Not that you’d ever admit this out loud.
Then there was the dress. It wasn’t white, per say, but it matched the pearls. And it flowed around you perfectly. It was starting to feel like the day was already better than midsummers, which you and Kie usually dreaded (but sometimes enjoyed). This was intimate, private, and not some party. And also not an excuse for the Camerons to parade around. Though that was mostly left up to Ward and Rose.
When you walked out of the back guest room, Rafe’s back was turned and he was looking out the window, not having moved from his spot you had placed him in earlier. Creeping up from your toes, you felt a smile coming across your face as you grinned to yourself. Of course Rafe was trying his best. It’s not of use to think that you would find him snooping or setting up booby traps in the pogue home base. But at least to laugh at the thought wasn’t baseless.
“Hey,” you said, so normally like you had been saying it to him casually all your life. You had avoided Rafe like the plague on many occasions, but now you wanted to sound welcoming for once.
He turned, his eyes stopped at your face then trailed the length of your body quickly, finding your eyes again as if traveling back home. He smirked, which only brought you the thought that he would say something snarky but instead he said, “You clean up nice.”
You shrugged, joking a bit as you said, “You look okay.”
Instead of responding at first, Rafe pulled you close to him and kissed you. His lips tasted sweetly of lemonade and alcohol and you wondered when he had time to drink any, or if that was what he always tasted like. You either couldn’t remember or didn’t care. “Take a compliment, L/N.” Was what he said when you pulled away. His eyes were clear when you looked, this dark blue color you always loved. All at once you wanted nothing to break this night. Nothing but to handle it with care. You wanted Rafe and you to work.
_____________________
The Island Club always smelled of flowers when you walked in. Sweet, herbal, and somewhat pungent. It always reminded you of summer, even when the Island was experiencing the annual winter seasons. But in a familiar sense, you were glad that the doorway still had flowers to welcome you on either side, as if they wanted to renew your senses. So when you walked in this time, with Rafe, you took a big whiff of the air. Not only because you wanted to remember it, but because you wanted to have a fresh start. This was not you and Sarah’s brother. This was not you with a Kook. This was you with a boy you liked, going to eat dinner. 
When you sat down, at a table for two, it seemed too perfect.
Rafe started the conversation with a question you didn’t expect, “So what about being a pogue do you like?”
“Oh, um-” You took a sip of your water. “Is this a real question?” It didn’t feel forced, it just felt odd that he seemed to care. You couldn’t surmise that this had any devious connection to it, it just felt like Rafe wanted to know more about you. Which was new, and welcomed.
Rafe nodded, “Yes, Y/N. I may have not been friendly to the pogues-”
“More like devious, conniving, hateful.”
“But-” He took a deep breath, like what he was about to say was worth more than the words before. “I like you. That counts for something doesn’t it? Behind everything?”
A light fired in you, a spark of something, “You really want to know?”
Rafe nodded, let his shoulders relax, and let you continue. You told him all about how the pogues were a family. No man left behind, unless dire circumstances were involved. How you stood by each other. How JJ made you laugh, which made Rafe tense up as it seemed he was still not over the illusion of that relationship, when it was purely a friendship. How John B understood you. How Pope helped you. How Kiara was there for you. Through everything. They just made sense to you. Unlike the Kooks, it wasn’t some casual thing…this was family. 
When you were done, Rafe seemed to stir in his own feelings. You waited patiently for a response, one you were nervous for. “Kooks are like that too, you know.”
You pulled at the hem of your dress, a nervous tic you’d most like to get rid of, “It’s not the same.” You shook your head. There was nothing else like the pogues, you had looked.
“Wheezie is like that.” He paused to play with his napkin and then looked back up at you,  “She has a lot of loyalty in her blood.” 
“Oh, I believe that.” This was said with warmth. Wheezie, as you knew, was Rafe’s soft spot. You’d grown up beside her too and loved her for your quirks. When the other night you admitted to missing her, you weren’t lying. 
“You’re like that too.” It was like he was still holding something back, although unwilling to say so. It made you think, did he think Sarah was like that too? Was lumping Sarah and you together a line he didn’t want to cross with you? 
“Do you think you are?” You asked. You wanted to know the answer, truly. 
“I think I’ve had my doubts.”
“And what about those times you didn’t doubt?”
It was at this moment that Rafe cocked his head, looking slightly past you. His eyes trailed the dining area, and his brows furrowed together deeper than you had seen before, more in anger and annoyance than anything else. And those emotions had rarely been linked to you as a singular entity. “Maybank is here.” He said plainly, losing his focus on you. 
“He works- What? He’s here? Now?” You swiftly moved yourself in your seat, twisting your neck to view who Rafe was looking at. It was indeed JJ Maybank, looking very angry. He was also, indeed, in his work clothes, but you had deliberately picked a section of the club that JJ didn’t serve. It seemed like he had found you anyway. 
You stood up before JJ reached the table, the anger obvious and brewing on his face and put your hand up where his chest ended up, bumping into you slightly. “JJ, you were working today?” His eyes bore into you, lasers going through your skull and obliterating you in the process. 
“What is this?” He held his hat in his hands, all crumpled between his fingers. A sore sight to see as the hat was one of his prized possessions. His blond hair was full of flyaways and runaway strands, but even considering that it wasn’t normally perfect in its own right it was a mess right now. He looked so different than he had the other night, all outgoing and free flying.
“We’re on a date Maybank, if you’d excuse us-” You put a hand up to stop Rafe, only turning back to him for a second. Rafe’s voice had changed the demeanor of the blond boy, it was almost like you could feel the heat radiating off of him.
JJ looked back at Rafe once, but it only seemed to make him angrier, “A date! Wow okay. Nice going, Y/N. Real stand up guy.” His face was turning red, a shade you didn’t enjoy,  and he took a step closer to you as if to show you the anger buried in his face. The betrayal. Rafe stood up at this, with only you between the two boys. 
“Really, JJ, what is this about?” You said sternly, trying to angle your best friend away from Rafe. 
“What is this abo- Can we just talk in private, Y/N?” JJ seethed, letting out soft slow breaths you knew he needed when he got stressed out.
Rafe is suddenly at your side, but you push him away before he can talk and rush into any argument with JJ. You wanted to validate JJ’s feelings, you just didn’t know how to get there. “Rafe, it's fine.” You said to the boy behind you. Then to JJ, “Of course we can.”
Both were said through gritted teeth.
________________________
JJ knew the ins and the outs of the Island Club from working there since he was fourteen, and you knew it from being a Kook from such a young age so it was never hard for the two of you to find hiding spots around the grounds. On this particular day, it was in the downstairs lounge where you both knew no one would be during dining hours. At least not anyone important enough to spot you or kick you out. JJ, this time, was pulling you by the hand to get there and didn’t seem to notice enough to drop your hand when you had found what you were looking for. JJ’s love language had always been touch, and you knew he found comfort in you, so you let your hand stay in his. You found comfort in him too, as you two were usually two peas in a pod.
Now that you were alone, JJ seemed to calm down, to ease quicker into his usual self. One that was open with you, not angry.
“JJ just please tell me-”
“I’m in love with you.” JJ said the words fast, and you paused, your mind dusty with confusion just trying to scramble behind him. JJ loves you. JJ loves you. JJ loves you.
“What?” You said, you could hear a squeak in your voice and you were sure he could too. 
“I’m not supposed to say anything. No Pogue on Pogue macking, I know. Believe me, I know. But now you’re on a date with this utter asshole and I can’t let that happen. I can’t-”
“I thought this was about your hat.”
“What about my-? Oh, yeah, I’m not happy about hearing the story of you losing it with Rafe but that’s only part of why I’m here and literally so insignificant now. Are you hearing me? Y/N/N?”
You let go of his hand. "JJ I just- I don’t know what to say, okay? I’m sorry about the hat. But I’m not sorry about the date.”
“You can’t be serious, Y/N. It’s Rafe fucking Cameron. And we’re us. I know we’re us. We make sense.”
“What if I don’t want to make sense, JJ?” You took a breath after realizing you were also getting worked up. You hoped Rafe was upstairs minding his business, waiting for you to get back. Your head spun. Everything seemed so fast now. It just felt like your world was crumbling. And it was, at least pieces of it. JJ was a flirty boy, had you been stringing him along? What about all the times you were together, did you feel a spark too? All those jokes, all those looks.
“What if I want Rafe?” You finally asked, not really a question you wanted answered.
JJ took a step back, like that was the last thing he expected you to say. You didn’t know what he did expect, you to dive into his arms? Say that you were saved? “JJ,” You tried to close the gap between you, but JJ just stepped back again with confusion and anger bubbling on his face. You wanted this to be easy. There was no easy when breaking someone’s heart. Especially not with JJ, who hid his heart at every twist and turn. “We’re best friends. But we’re not…more.”
“So you just want to go back to your Kook roots? Everything with the pogues was what? Bullshit?” He spit. He ran his fingers through his hair, something he did when he was frustrated. 
“JJ-” 
“Just go.”
You couldn’t lose JJ, not this way. Not because he loves you. You grabbed at his arm and he shook you off, a little too hard. You fell back as Rafe came into the room. He knew the Island Club too. Had almost shown you and Sarah all the secret spots in the first place. Of course you had the two boys that knew this place like the back of their hands.  
Then they were on top of each other. You couldn’t tell who threw the first punch, but you couldn’t tell who you didn’t want it to be. JJ, for one, because you never wanted him hurt in your life. And Rafe, well, because you loved Rafe. You had to admit this now. Had Rafe not driven you home, was there some part of you that would’ve gone with JJ? Loved him back even?
You had to stop it. Frozen, you dazed into a different state. A state where none of this had happened. Where you were fine being strangers with Rafe. Fine not being with JJ either. A place where you weren’t a pogue. A Kook. Nothing. You were just you. 
And when you finally got out of that daze, you realized how stupid it was. You were a pogue. You were a Kook. And most importantly, those identities had caused this rift. This fight. It all mattered. 
“STOP!” You screamed, flailing toward the boys. Rafe was on top of JJ, punching him. JJ was still sitting up halfway and fighting back. Blood splattered on your dress. You didn’t care, not at all. Then suddenly you were on top of Rafe, trying to pull him away, tugging and pulling. But it wasn’t until the other waitstaff heard your screams that he finally got off the Maybank boy. 
Both boys were bloody, but JJ looked worse. A pit in your stomach formed, sitting in the back and swallowing you whole. It was your fault, you knew that. It was hard to see someone you loved like this, but it was also hard to come to terms with what had just happened. But he got up, not looking at you, and left to get cleaned up by his coworkers. 
He left his hat on the floor, where it lay crumpled as if his hand was still imprinted on it.
______________________
The good news was when you called, your parents said they would vouch for JJ as patrons of the Island Club so he wouldn’t be fired. You hadn’t told your parents that Rafe had been involved, or that the two of you had been on a date and you figured that fact could be a later lesson. And you also knew, as JJ wasn’t a fan of law enforcement, that he wouldn’t press charges against Rafe. Which his coworkers were most likely going to suggest. And Rafe was a Cameron. Untouchable. Ward would have to come home and clean it up, put a little more money into the club. But it was fixable. 
They still asked you to leave, which you understood. So you had Rafe take you to your empty house on Figure Eight. 
You got out the first aid kit and had Rafe sit on top of your kitchen’s island. Hoping to clean up the wounds, you dabbed antiseptic onto the cuts on his face and hands. “Does that hurt?” You asked quietly, pressing softly on Rafe’s features.
“Why are you taking care of me, Y/N?” Rafe’s voice was back to being rough edges and unsaid feelings. “Why aren’t you with JJ?” That was the first time that Rafe hadn’t called JJ by his last name, and it just slipped out. Rafe was only ever this soft with two people, and you were now one of them. You wanted to know why. You wanted to know everything. Admittedly though Rafe did have a point, one you had been trying to ignore. Your phone had blown up after the fight from the other pogues. Pope disagreed heavily on you not showing up to the Chateau. But out of all of them, Kie understood the most, and thought it was best you stayed away for a bit. At first hearing this, your heart sank into that little puddle in your gut, but you figured it was for the best. 
You ignored his question, “Why’d you get in the fight, Rafe?”
Rafe didn’t try to excuse his actions, or even imply that JJ threw the first punch, he just shrugged, “I don’t know.”
“What?” A freezing blow struck your heart at his answer, and you figured it was because maybe he didn’t care. But then-
“I want you to like me.” Rafe looked at you, breathing so evenly it was like no fight had occurred. He grabbed your hand and eased you to the gauze down on the counter next to him. “Not Maybank. Not the Heyward kid. Not John B. Me. Okay? You want no other kooks in your life? Fine, Y/N. Whatever. But have me. For fucks sake, you shouldn’t. You really shouldn’t. But I saw him push you down and I just- I wanted you perfect and safe and away from anyone who could take you away from me. I heard what he said. And I don’t care about love. I don’t. I want you to just like me. And tonight, I showed you the real me and you're still here. So I'm just confused."
“Little mushy there, Cameron. Almost forgot it was you talking.”
“Y/N, please.”
Then you kissed him, and it was worth a mess of a life. Just for that moment, maybe. But it was worth it. Some answers don’t need words.
There was no concern about the parents or the friends or having shown up at the Island Club for all to see. There were just the two of you. Rafe, bloody from another fight and yet sober and clean and happy to be with you. And you, you had a lot of feelings. But for now, liking Rafe was enough.
Taglist ☼ @totallynotkaibiased @parkershoco @sarahlizzie @craftyalmondghostflap @siriuslysmoking @igotmajordaddyissues @strngtsblog @fangirlfree @blazebreaker @slvtherinseeker
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oddlykilledghosts · 6 months
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Trying to get through a possible final part for "I Want You To Like Me" so I can focus on some holiday one shots!! Give me hope!
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oddlykilledghosts · 9 months
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Fanfiction Discography
I had this idea to start a collection of x reader fanfictions based solely on music, and each song will be the title of the fic. I'm starting with mostly Taylor Swift but can do anything song! This post will be included on the pinned post on my account and added to whenever a new fic is available! Fics will be for different characters and requests are open! I am hoping to start this when I finish up part 4 of my current Rafe series and when I get to a few requests I already have :)
Olivia Rodrigo
GUTS
bad idea, right? (TBD)
Taylor Swift
Debut
Fearless
Speak Now
Red
1989
Reputation
Lover
Folklore
Evermore
Midnights
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oddlykilledghosts · 9 months
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guess who's working on "I Want You To Like Me"
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oddlykilledghosts · 10 months
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Fanfic Ideas✎
I took a little break from writing smaller stories and was focusing on some longer books I have on my wattpad (@ libbyman) but I'm back and want to see what you guys want to see next, will most likely write all of these in the coming future, so just think what you want sooner!
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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I Want You To Like Me - Rafe Cameron x reader (Part Three)
Summary: You're a pogue by choice, kook from birth. The friendship that you have with the other pogues is undeniable, no one questions their loyalty for you or your loyalty to them. So when a certain King of the Kooks takes interest in you, it's only right to turn him down. Right?
Apologies for the long wait! Had a lot of ways this chapter could’ve gone…but hopefully you guys like what I ended up on…I also ended with a little less Rafe than I had intended but that equals more parts for later on
Also do you guys want me to share my outer banks playlist I listen to while writing these fics? I also have one specifically for this series! Lemme know
p.s. I had Paramore’s “All I Wanted” on repeat while writing this particular part so do with that what you will
Word Count: 7k
Pairings: Rafe Cameron x reader, John B x Sarah Cameron, platonic!Pogues x reader
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The phone call aftermath moved very quickly. You had taken a couple minutes too long, soaking up the air that had reached you in the wind from the ocean in a sore attempt to calm your flushed cheeks, and when you returned to the Chateau Pope was awake and Kie and John B had fallen into an argument that left your stomach heavy with added dread. At least, you thought to yourself, that this dread was familiar. Talking on the phone with Rafe Cameron while he was oh so casually “hitting balls” with Topper and Kelce at the country club most definitely did not fall into that category. Pope, who was using the same cereal bowl as you had been and had hopefully cleaned it before his own use, was sitting in the kitchen in a hungover daze looking like he wanted to step into the fight and use a few calming words but couldn’t quite make the leap there. The Chateau’s exterior door to the screened-in porch creaked on its hinges but the indoor entryway opened without noise when you walked in. This calmed your heart rate after hearing the voices inside get louder when you approached the house, not wanting to involve yourself too much in a fight when you had JJ’s hat to be dealt with. Neither of those things mattered though, because when you stood in the doorway debating how to get to your room without getting in the sight of either of the two bickering pogues, Kie spotted you, just as you deciphered what they were arguing about. Sarah. 
In these types of fights between the pogues, there were always sides, but there was also the essential knowledge that the fighting would eventually be resolved. In being the two girls in the group, you ended up sticking by Kie in a lot of times of need whether you agreed with her or not. JJ tended to pick John B. Pope was always the mediator. It was how things worked. And they worked well. This instance, however, was odd. 1) because JJ was out surfing, 2) You owed John B, and 3) because you needed John B’s help with Rafe that day too…which meant Kie was right AND was going to be left in the dust. Plus, a little bit of you also hated that Kie happened to be right that particular day about that particular (*cough* the Cameron’s) topic. Mostly because that very day you were going to go against almost every word she was saying.
Kie reached a hand out to you, urging you to show your alliance by standing physically next to her. If you went, you would be parallel to John B and crossing a line across the threshold. Her eyes poked holes in your heart, as if her gaze caused the blood to fall slowly out of it and pool around your feet in a painting of guilt. It was one argument. She would forgive you. Except that this small, meaningless fight meant more and you knew it. It meant sides. Sides that weren’t in this room. Sides that you and John B were taking. Were you willing to risk fighting for one kiss? That one kiss swam in your bones and it felt so warm, so similar to the sun hitting your skin. But this was wrong. “Y/N, you know I’m right, right?” Your hesitation caused Kie to falter. Normally, she would be full of confidence and show no mercy to her opponents, but as a friend you held her heart in your hands. Unfortunately, you were about to squeeze a little.
You eyed John B carefully but even he looked a little lost and frustrated as you met his gaze. His eyes wavered a bit just as you stepped a foot closer to his side of the room-
“Y/N kissed Rafe.” The room suddenly felt stiff with hot Outer Banks air as the words fell from John B’s mouth.
“WHAT?” Your head snapped immediately back to John B, while at the same time Kiara echoed your shock and your word and looked towards you. Pope munched on his cereal, still a little sleepy and a little bit scared to intervene until he has his wits about him. Luckily he had already gulped down Kiara’s concoction, as it was sitting empty next to his bowl, so he was sure to sober up faster than usual. 
“And he has JJ’s hat.” John B helpfully added to his last statement.
This time only Kiara spoke, “What the fuck, Y/N.” She placed a hand on her forehead and looked down at her feet which you noticed were a pair of vans that had originally belonged to you.
Heartbeat slowing a bit, you paused, looking between John B and Kiara. When your eyes glanced over John B his own eyes urged you to talk. To say something. You didn’t know what his game was. John B obviously had kept his relationship secret for some time now, only making a slip up the night before. Why couldn’t you? Why couldn’t you figure this out without judgment you knew was going to come from your friends? You thought John B understood this. He had forgiven you easily, but only because of his own indiscretions with the middle Cameron sibling. You knew how much this feud hurt Kie, you had been there when it happened. You couldn’t hurt her like this. 
But you already had. 
Kie stood still for a minute, staring at your silence, and finally after playing with the multiple friendship bracelets on her wrist she spoke again with an exasperated sigh, “Let’s go get the hat, Y/N.”
Then she walked out of the Chateau.
“You should probably follow her.” Pope said between munches, he had already poured himself another bowl. The solo cup that had been taped to his hand from the night before had been attacked and was hanging limply but was still unfortunately attached.
When you started towards the door, Pope added with a heavy amount of side eye towards the leader of the pogues, “Both of you.” John B, not wanting to cross Pope when he was probably right, pushed past you and followed Kie out towards the Twinkie. 
“You’ll talk to-” You said, stopping at the door.
“JJ. Yup.” Pope responded. You gave your friend a smile and he gave you one back, laughing a little cautiously as he added, “You know Rafe’s a dick, right?”
You shook your head, a little happy Pope didn’t seem as mad and a little disappointed in yourself that you were here in this situation at all. “Yeah. Just-”
“Talk to JJ. I know. I’ll distract him until you guys get back.”
When you went to leave you again stopped and turned back to Pope, “You don’t hate me, do you?”
Pope turned towards you with a light and soft smile on his face, “No, I don’t, Y/N. Now let me eat my third bowl of cereal. It’s brain-”
“-food. Blah blah. I’m leaving.”
_______________________
When you reached the cars (there were usually only two there, yours and the Twinkie, as well as JJ’s dirt bike) your car was missing and you assumed JJ had taken it down to his favorite surf spot, so Kie had already made herself comfortable in the front seat of the VW van. When you were close enough to see your friends through the windows, you could tell there had been a little spat before you got there because John B was sulking in the back. 
There were always signs that John B was actually upset, only this time you couldn’t even decipher his side profile. He looked more on edge than anything. You wished you could lend him JJ’s hat, as if transferring the magic again…but you’d have to get the hat first and that seemed like it would happen after Kie killed you both. If Kie was really about to blow up she might think to do it in the Twinkie driving 80 down the highway so no one could hear the lecture she was about to induce upon the two of you. The hat magic might cheer up you and John B after being totally eviscerated though.
You knocked on the driver’s side window, and Kiara, looking a little pissed but not fuming, rolled it down. “Yes?” 
The thing was it was weird you could never view Kiara as angry. Yes, she had a lot of anger towards kooks and the environmental damages people and corporations were doing to the planet, but to you she was easy going and carefree and liked to have fun. Her eyebrows being furrowed always submitted confusion first in your mind, not anger. Especially when it was targeted at you.
“I assume I am also in a backseat timeout?”
“Get in the passenger seat, Y/N/N.”
Nicknames were a good sign, so you followed suit and climbed into the passenger side of the Twinkie and hoped Kiara wasn’t planning on crashing the van in a crime of passion and narrowly escaping as the sole survivor.
At first the drive was very quiet. Neither you or John B spoke, but you did send back and forth worrying glances. It was easy to read John B when you knew him like you did, easier now that he was letting you in on his feelings. His eyes gave everything away, and once you got used to looking in them, more often or not it was hardly a feat to discover what his true purposes were. However, you also wanted to send daggers through John B. But as much as you were angry with him you trusted him. He rarely saved his own ass instead of his friends. If this was an attempt to leech all the anger Kiara had about kooks away from him and onto you, you would’ve been able to tell. And so far, there was no sign of that in his deep brown irises. 
Then finally, halfway across the Cut, Kiara started talking. Well, she was more likely demanding answers than plainly having a chat. It started with a question, “Is what John B said true?”
Both you and John B started speaking at the same time but John B was louder and cut you off, “I wouldn’t lie about-”
Kie snapped back quickly, still keeping her eyes on the road, “I was asking Y/N. So shut up.” John B opened his mouth once more to protest, but no words came out and he closed it just as fast.
You sighed as the Twinkie came to a red light, “Yes. I kissed Rafe last night. To be fair, I think I was drunk. But either way, I’m sorry.”
Kie let out a breath, “Is this an ongoing thing?”
You tried to hide the fact that it might be becoming one, but your hesitation with your answer cued Kie off. “...No.”
“But you like him.”
“Jury’s out on that one.”
John B piped up, “I have a feeling the Jury has its verdict.”
At the same time you reached back to hit him, Kiara again told John B to be quiet. Then she continued and peeked a soft glance at you while she was driving while occasionally looking back to the idle road, “You weren’t going to tell me?”
“Maybe not yet? I was very worried I was making the wrong move.”
She sighed and then pulled over onto the side of the street. “Y/N, yeah, I’m mad at you.” Then she took a deep breath in, and with a little more tension in her shoulders she continued, “But you deserve to figure things out. I’ve mostly figured my side of things out…but you came from that side of the island too. However, you are also a pogue, and you are also my best friend. I don’t want you to get hurt. And Rafe well…” Kiara’s voice was full of hard edges and warnings of being careful (and mostly not to cross her again) but you knew she was trying to be understanding. It wasn’t a full switch from how she had been fighting with John B at the Chateau but it was a kinder (in retrospect) approach.
“He’s quite an interesting choice.” John B piped up.
“Shut up John B.” You and Kie said at the same time, and you turned back to each other a smile tainting both of your lips. Connection. You felt this overwhelming urge to hug your friend. Like it was new and fresh, seeing her with clean eyes. It was refreshing to see that your assumptions about Kiara’s reaction had been wrong. That you were worried about this big explosion and the volcano had passed by nonthreateningly. She was still very much her assertive self, but it was recognizable and not seized with so much anger that you couldn’t move past it. That you had been right to trust your gut that Kie was not harboring anger for you, and she never had been. It would just take her time to understand if this was something you really wanted. It would take time for you to understand.
Although there was still anger there that you could clearly see underneath her civility and in her tone that you would be able to work through it at a later date. Maybe when this whole Rafe thing turned out to be a flitting desire and not something that would cause a bigger debacle. You were sure though, that if Kie had suspected it was just hooking up, she would’ve been less angry. It was one thing to have sex with a Kook and it was another to be thinking about having real feelings for one. Especially Rafe. 
“It’s not like I couldn’t see this coming, you have been in love with him since we were friends with Sarah.” Kie added, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes as she showed off some of the facial expressions she had been holding back. 
“I have not been in love with him-” You protested, pouting a little that you had seemed that transparent.
Kie laughed a little and interrupted you, “Okay sure, recently you’ve said you hated him. Which was apparently a lie.”
“Lie my ass!” You protested again, pushing your friend playfully as she sat still at the wheel of the unmoving Twinkie.
“Well either you’re lying to us or yourself.” John B chided annoyingly as he purposefully messed up your hair and leaned up to where you and Kie were sitting. “I think it’s better I said something, look at you two as close as ever.” 
Which was exactly why John B spilled your stupid dirty laundry, you saw it plain and clear in his eyes and a little bit in that stupid smirk. You had figured it shortly into the drive, but John B didn’t want you to be in his position. Kiara was smart and fierce, but she was also stubborn. If you had wandered over to John B’s side and held your secret close to your chest, your friendship with your best friend might have never been the same. He was saving you from later fights. Because he was right, Rafe could end badly. You might need your best friend for that. Big John never said honesty was the best policy, but you liked to think that he would be proud of the pogues sticking together.
You stole a look at Kie and she nodded in confirmation, then you both used your hands to push John B back into the back of the Twinkie with force. He landed on the floor of the vehicle with a soft thud and a playful chuckle. “John B, you are a quarter forgiven. Don’t push your luck. You’re still dating my mortal enemy.” Kie said with a sharp tongue, throwing a dagger of a look towards your mutual friend. Somehow the incident with you had lightened her mood about Sarah, and you hoped she could also learn to forgive John B for keeping that a secret. You were ready just that morning to lay your life down for the same if not worse conditions.
“Does this mean I’m fully forgiven?” You asked, looking at Kiara and your similar chokers and shared shoes. There was a kinship there, in the things you shared as pogues. As if you were all connected. It showed in JJ’s shirts you found and ended up sleeping in. Or one of Pope’s button downs. But you and Kie shared the most, your styles intermingled and showed the bond. Kook turned pogue, mirror images. 
Kiara sighed and rolled her eyes, “I’m still deliberating. We still have to get the hat back.”
You checked your phone, it was eleven twenty a.m. you still had time to make it to Tannyhill. “Rafe said to meet him at Tannyhill at noon.”
In an attempt to not make things worse, you assumed Kiara elected to ignore that you had made plans to meet up with Rafe, whether it be for JJ’s hat or not. And you were glad she did. You needed your best friend.
“Gun it.” John B said with a smirk, still on the floor of the Twinkie. 
“This thing only goes so fast, Routledge.” Kiara retorted, but pulled back onto the road and hit the gas hard. 
___________________
You got to Tannyhill with ten minutes to spare, which was exceedingly lucky with how fast the Twinkie goes. When you arrived, you noticed that there were a few straggling cars from the night before that were still parked around the house and on the street. This time, rather than what you had thought the night before, you knew Ward would not approve this. He’s more of the kind of man that pretends to be friendly with neighbors and isn’t actually forgiving. But now with less people at the property, it was open enough to pull into the house’s driveway. You really hoped that Rafe was right and Sarah would not be home since everything was still fairly fresh with Kie. Seeing the two girls go head to head would be too much for one morning. 
When finally you made it close enough to the front door, Kiara put the Twinkie into park and looked around, as if a group of Kooks was about to ambush us. When she seemed to think it was all clear, she got out of the car. It was your turn to ask a question, “Where are you going?” you asked, a little afraid of what her answer would be because as soon as you asked it John B was already out of the car too (although a bit more comfortable with the house than Kie seemed to be).
Kie shrugged and motioned for you to come out, “We’re getting the hat, you coming Y/N/N?”
See, to you this could mean many things, and several of them went through your mind. The most common instance is that Kie would pummel Rafe. It was safer than sorry to follow your friends so you didn’t end up locked up after assaulting someone and Rafe claiming a B&E case.
You caught up quickly with your fellow pogues but started to protest that you should go in alone. That it was fine. You could get it and everything would be great. Both of your friends swatted your protests away as soon as you reached the front door. “You need backup,” Kie would say. “We get the hat, get out, it’ll be an adventure,” John B added, though you weren’t quite sure what adventure he was referring to that would land you at Tannyhill. Then Rafe opened the door, with you tugging on John B’s arm to turn back to the Twinkie, John B pulling you towards the door and Kiara’s arms crossed in a defensive pose. You froze with your hands locked around John B’s arm.
“Sarah’s not here.” Rafe said in a bored voice to John B, the door only open enough for his silhouette as if he were afraid all three of you would barge in if he opened it wider. His eyes subtly passed over you in a quick motion as he scanned the three of you and immediately you dropped John B’s arm. A sizable bit of embarrassment washed over you, but you let it go easily as you looked at Rafe in the doorway. Mostly because if anyone at all knew that you weren’t with John B, it would be the Cameron boy. 
Kiara spoke up in a stern voice, “We’re here for the hat, actually.”
Rafe’s eyebrows twitched, as if remembering Kie’s brashness for the first time, “Well, actually, I’m curious why you think I have a hat you would want.”
Kiara pointed towards you without breaking eye contact with Rafe, “This one,” she paused and smiled smugly. “Seems to think you do.”
Rafe looked back to you swiftly but his expression stayed bored and made of stone, and his eyes went quickly back to Kiara, “Then only they can come in.”
Kie crossed her arms and looked at John B as if asking him a question but he shrugged subtly and she went to look at you, “Okay. We’ll be waiting.”
You stepped forward and Rafe opened the door to just fit you through, although you had to duck underneath his arm to get through the threshold. He smelled nice, you’re sure like some expensive cologne he owned, and it wafted close to you as you passed him almost enveloping your senses.
When he shut the door you heard John B yell something through the door that sounded a lot like, “No funny business you two!” And then something like Kie smacking him on his head.
———————————
Rafe led you to the living room, to the same couch on which you had talked to him the night before. But he stayed standing, leaning himself against the wall watching you. You couldn’t tell if he wanted you to sit down so you stayed standing opposite him and crossed your arms in an act to do something with your limbs. It seemed like he was telling the truth about not drinking much, he had been up early to golf and seeing him now he had the same glow around him that came with Cameron sobriety.
“So…” You started, looking at him expectantly. 
“Why are your friends here?” He asked, looking stern and unmoving. The house was more quiet than you remembered in your past kook years and it unnerved you a bit. When you had been friends with Sarah there was always laughing, always the three of you, and the house didn’t seem so big. But occupying the new space there again was the feeling you had, pulling you towards Rafe Cameron, as if it filled the emptiness. It buzzed inside your bones and all of a sudden all you could think about was kissing him again as if this feeling was controlling your every thought. Because you wanted to. You wanted to forget about your friends outside and “kooks vs pogues” and just kiss Rafe Cameron because you could. Because you had, and you weren’t ready to give that up. 
You were staring at his lips when Rafe spoke again, causing you to jolt back up to his blue eyes. “I didn’t think one kiss would have you running off to your friends so fast, Y/N.”
There was a hint of familiarity in his words that awakened your senses back to normal, something that reminded you of the old Rafe when he would tease you and Sarah. You shrugged, “They just want the hat and then they’ll leave.”
“Will you leave?” Rafe prompted harshly, stepping a foot closer to you and away from the wall. His eyes were cloudy and you couldn’t see beyond his intentions. You wanted to believe that he wanted you there. That you could stay. Spend a real day with Rafe away from everyone. 
It took a second for you to decide on your words, but when you did they came out easily, “You invited me, I planned to stick around.” You crossed your arms again after you spoke, a little uneasy in standing your ground. “Now where’s JJ’s hat?”
“Always sticking up for Maybank, Y/N. It’s really hard for me to believe you don’t have a thing for him.” As he spoke he walked towards one of the linen closets and waved you towards it. His words, you knew, were an insult coming from his mouth, but it barely bothered you. JJ and you were very close, as you were with all the pogues. Even John B had once mentioned the two of you becoming a couple. But it was odd it was something Rafe noticed. Then he spoke again, nodding you towards the closet, “Kept it nice and pretty for you.” His tone was a little condescending, but otherwise not laced with malice like you had expected.
You made a face at Rafe and walked over to the closet and when you opened the door there it was. You didn’t want to admit that his comment of ‘Kept it nice and pretty’ was actually accurate as it rested nicely on some fresh white towels. No gasoline stains or smells and no tears in it (as your imagination had led you to believe). It was sitting plainly in the closet. “Why is it-” You started.
Rafe was by your side the minute you spoke, sparing little distance between the two of you. “Didn’t want anyone to see it.” There were doubts to this comment, but you didn’t poke at them. His friends were casually showing up at Tannyhill most days, and even Sarah would’ve asked questions about Rafe having JJ’s hat in his possession.
“And I assume you didn’t want JJ’s hat ‘tainting’ your perfect room. Pogue paraphernalia would never dare to disrupt the King of the Kook’s room.” These words dripped with sarcasm, a usual tone in the Chateau, and it alarmed you that you were making playful remarks at the kook in front of you instead of plainly insulting him. 
Rafe ignored your joke, and slight jeer at him, and glanced at your lips a little too quickly. “Is this a confession that you’ve been thinking of my room, Y/N?”
You stepped back, trying to keep your composure, “No,” You grabbed the hat and pushed through Rafe to make your way back to the front door. You spoke this time now facing away from the kook, and slightly waving him off with the hat in your hand, “According to you, I should be fantasizing about JJ’s room.” Then you added quickly, “If anything.”
Before Rafe could catch up with you, you had already opened the door. Kie and John B fell hard onto the entryway’s hardwood floors as you swung the door open. It was obvious they had been leaning against the door when it had been closed. Either listening or resting against the doorway. Probably listening. You let it go, since you figured they had a right to be a little nosey. When you had opened the door quickly, the two pogues had fallen with a thud and now opened their eyes to you looming over them. “Got the hat.” You said cheerfully to your friends laying on the floor, waving the hat from your fingertips into their view. 
It seemed too easy. Too nice of Rafe to not burn up JJ’s hat in anger at the pogues. They’ve had enough squabbles for that to be possible. But there it was in your hands, and here you were ready to get it back to its owner as if nothing had ever happened. 
A part of you hoped that maybe that hat hinted at something softer in Rafe. The Rafe who might have liked you. Seen you care, and then cared in tandem. It didn’t seem like something he would do, and yet you wanted to hope. 
Kiara grabbed it from your hands and sat up, leaving John B to nurse his head while still laying pathetically on the floor. “Mission accomplished,” Kiara praised, a little in spite of herself and then looked annoyingly down at John B. “Get up, JJ’s probably already at the Chateau.”
At first John B didn’t move but only offered up both of his hands, and after a round of Kiara calling him pathetic you both helped him up. He was a lot heavier than he looked and Kiara kept calling him names but eventually you both got the boy standing upright. Rafe stood watch as you and Kiara struggled, not offering any help because either he knew it wouldn’t be received or he didn’t want to. Both you and Kiara made sure to send an unpleasant face his way but he just shrugged and looked smug. It was quick going after that as you all knew JJ could stay out on the ocean all day, but he wouldn’t as he had a shift at the country club. So there was a small window of him noticing it was gone and your friends being able to retrieve it back to him. 
As John B and Kiara were making their exit they turned back to you, as you had stayed in the entrance to Tannyhill. Kiara called back encouragingly and a bit hopefully, “You coming, Y/N/N?” John B looked more like he knew your answer already and gave you a little nod back towards yourself, and additionally towards Rafe who he could see standing beyond you. You could feel it again, that buzzing, that pull…whatever it was. It was here. And you wanted it. You wanted to feel it. You wanted to fall into it. And as always, it was radiating off of Rafe who was standing a few feet behind you. And now that you were here you were more than aware of his presence.
“No I’m okay, tell JJ I had to go home for the day.” You looked back behind you, catching a glimpse of Rafe again leaning up against the wall and watching you. “I’ll catch up with you guys later.” You waved to your friends, although Kiara looked a little unconvinced of your safety at the Kook residence, but she got into the Twinkie all the same and drove away (mostly after John B gave her a little nudge and not after she gave Rafe the finger). 
You turned around and closed the door.
__________________________
The minute you closed the door, no longer supervised, you felt the pull become stronger. It felt odd to be alone with him. You hadn’t spent this much time with the Kook since your days of being friends with his sister. Him just standing a few feet from you  felt intimidating. A beat of silence passed between the two of you as Rafe took you in.
You prayed he couldn’t hear your quickened heart beat.
“About last night-” You started, playing with the choker Kie had let you borrow. 
Rafe was suddenly moving towards you until he was a couple inches away. Subconsciously he took a small step back, but not quite big enough to give you any actual space to have your own thoughts. His eyes were suddenly harsh but when he spoke it was rushed and quiet, “If you’re going to say it was a mistake-”
You opened up your mouth to speak but he interrupted you before you could. “I don’t think it’s a mistake.”
Part of you wanted to be truthful, that you agreed. That you wanted more of him. But when you opened your mouth again, something else came out. “What?” Nerves got the better of you. This Rafe wasn’t one you were familiar with yet. The one clear with his feelings. Clear with feelings towards you.
That step that he took to separate the two of you was a distance you wanted to sever. And now, subconsciously hating that distance, you took a step forward towards the boy so close to you, and yet it still felt too far. You could practically feel the heat from his body and the breath coming evenly from his mouth and nose on your cheeks. Rafe’s eyes didn’t leave yours. Didn’t even look down to check you out, though he easily could. “Do you want me to say it?” Rafe questioned, leaning towards you a little more, wanting clear in his eyes so locked with your own.
Heat flooded into your cheeks, and you knew he was pretending not to be pleased at the sight. You wanted desperately to kiss him. To stop this pathetic excuse of talking. But you also did want him to say it. To soothe your mind about his intentions. “A little,” you said, trying to keep your voice as even as his. 
“You don’t think I want you?” Rafe chided, turning his head slightly to the side with a smirk. 
“No,” you shook your head. “I think you do and you don’t want to admit it.”
And then, with Rafe’s face twisted slightly in confusion, you closed the gap between the two of your bodies and pulled him close to you. You didn’t want to hesitate anymore, you wanted to dive in. His body reacted, even in his small state of shock at your words, and he melted slightly into you as you kissed, his arms immediately wrapping around you and pulling you as close to him as humanly possible. It was wanting. Wanting each other. Wanting more. Wanting this. His body was warm, so much warmer than you were, and he felt sturdy. Safe somehow. More stern than other people you’d kissed. Your hands found their way up to his hair and it was unsurprisingly soft, you used it to pull him closer to you. He happily obliged to your touch.
You could tell he urged to touch you anywhere he could, but his hands stayed protectively on your back and waist as if holding you was enough for now. They felt nice there, as if you belonged in his embrace. There was something in him holding back and you wanted to let it loose. To scream that he could do what he wanted. You tried to urge that in the kiss, but you let it stay safe.
And then a breath of air, the two of you wanting to breathe but not wanting it to end. When you both detached your hands were on either of his face, cupping him there in a soft touch. And then there were his words, so easily misinterpreted, “Do you want to go up to my room?”
____________________
You had passed Rafe Cameron’s room many times. Laughing with Sarah as you gossiped in the hallway on your way to her room. Knocking on it to remind him to come down for dinner with his family when you were invited over. You remember exactly where it was, but you let Rafe guide you up the stairs with his hand in yours which felt so warm you wished you could bottle his warmth to keep with you when you were cold. His palm burned in your hand as it pulled you along.
The door was closed, just as you remembered, but he opened it easily as he pulled you back onto him and into the unfamiliar space. There was no time to observe what he put on his bedside table or what books he liked to read because Rafe was on you, springing you onto the bed and met you with another kiss there. This time, however, his hands moved along your body and slid along your curves. You were there with him, matching his energy as you urged to tug off the t-shirt he was wearing. 
Kie had been right. You had wanted this. For longer than you even let yourself believe. 
And suddenly you felt a little guilty that you hadn’t seen it before. That you doubted Kiara would support you. That you had waited this long. Because for a second, this felt overwhelmingly right. Right enough that all that time that had passed where this had not happened felt like a waste.
A short breath of air as Rafe pulled off his shirt and leaned down to kiss you again. The quick second he was away from you, the pull you had begun feeling reappeared but this time it was intoxicating and welcoming and pleasurable all at once, and it begged you to bring him back down for another long kiss.
“Wait-” You said, short of breath and flushed in your cheeks. 
Rafe stopped, even though you hadn’t expected him too, and loomed over you expectantly as his body heat encapsulated you in warmth, “What?” He replied, sounding a little annoyed.
“I just-” You paused, pushing a small lock of hair from his face and brushing your hand against his face. He seemed to suddenly freeze at your touch, as if it was too intimate for him. The world honestly could’ve stopped right there for you, just looking up at him. But then another thought came into your mind. “Is this what you had in mind for a date?” You questioned, confusion and annoyance mixing into one now that you remembered what he had said on your short phone call earlier in the day. 
Rafe rolled off of you and onto the bed that was unoccupied on your right and let out a small huff, “No.” Was all he said. He didn’t move to fetch his shirt that was now discarded on the floor. 
All you had to do was turn your head to look at him, so you did, and he was staring at his ceiling fan with his eyebrows knit together. His own face was also a little flushed and you wanted to touch his cheek again to see if his own warmth was magnified there. “I don’t want to be a hookup Rafe.” Was what you replied. 
Rafe turned his head, his face still stern and unreadable, while little strands of his hair falling into his eyes as he did so, and calmed a single piece inside of you that thought you were being played by the eldest Cameron, “We have a reservation at the Island Club this evening.”
“What?” A little shock went through you as you sat up at his confession. You were going to be seen in public while having dinner with Rafe Cameron. As your first date. An actual date. Did he bring every girl to the Island Club on their first date? You didn’t think he did, you’d never heard that before anyways. He was casual, you’d seen him date girls his dad wanted him to. But even when you were at the Island Club with your family, you’d never seen a girl on Rafe’s arm or at the Cameron’s table other than his sisters. This was something bigger, and here he was saying it.
“Do you not want to go?” Rafe asked, rubbing his eyes, still laying on his back.
You looked down at the boy, “I’m just surprised. I was about to have sex with you.”
“You were surprised you were going to have sex with me?” 
“No. Rafe. It’s just- This is all very confusing.”
That made Rafe sit up to meet your eyes at a clear level. “Y/N.”
“I was just about to go against everything and become a hookup and here you are saying we have this reservation-” You ached to touch him again, but the inches between the two of you on the bed felt like it was growing with each second. 
Rafe interrupted you, “Do you think it was Sarah’s idea to invite John B to the party last night?” 
This threw you off for a second. 
“Yes?” You phrased this as a question, but it seemed obvious to you that it was Sarah’s decision.
“When she asked, I told her she could invite him hoping his friends would come. Hoping you would come.” Rafe’s face stayed stoic and his chest moved evenly, but what he said didn’t sound confident like he usually did. It sounded like it was the truth, behind a wall he didn’t want to let down.
“But you hate pogues.” Rafe looked at you like you were stupid until you realized what he was saying, “You sat next to me on purpose.”
This time Rafe raised his eyebrows in annoyance, “It took awhile for Maybank to leave you the fuck alone, that’s for sure.”
A beat of silence as you went through the night before. 
“What if I didn’t come? What if I didn’t like you?” You wanted reassurance because you did like him. More than you wanted to admit. You wanted to ignore your differences and all of Rafe’s past shit and just be.  You wanted him to say it. 
Rafe dodged your questions with a response of his own, holding eye contact with you. “You aren’t a hookup, Y/N. Okay? Does that answer your question?”
For a split second you had to process. As if this was information you hadn’t quite gotten a hold of just yet. But there it was. Rafe Cameron actually liked you. He was closed off, sure, but this was his way of saying it. Of saying he would’ve tried harder. How many times had you seen him pick up food at The Wreck when you were there? Especially when you know he knows that it’s part pogue institution. Or out of the corner of your eye when you visited JJ at the Island Club? Or trying to talk to you at last year’s Midsummer's but Kiara kept butting in and pulling you away?
“Yes,” You said, moving a little closer to the boy. “It does.” Your heart was pounding. You did want to have sex with Rafe. Maybe not now. Maybe not even on your third date. But you wanted to. You wanted there to be a third date. You wanted to like him. 
You touched his face and moved on top of his lap, “Kiss me again.” You whispered close enough so only he could hear.
And he did.
☆taglist: @totallynotkaibiased @asimpwriter @kriss-harrington @parkershoco @sarahlizzie @craftyalmondghostflap @siriuslysmoking @igotmajordaddyissues @strngtsblog @fangirlfree @slvtherinseeker
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Love Triangle or No?
Hoping people will answer this! I'm not sure how many chapters "I Want You to Like Me" is going to end up having, and this would really help me figure it out so I have a question?
Would you guys want a little bit of a love triangle with JJ in it? I'm thinking things lemme know
I have mixed feelings
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Hi! Do you have a master list by chance? :)
Hi back! Wanted to do this earlier but couldn't because 1) I didn't have enough works and 2) because I didn't know how to make one...but my Masterlist is now up and ready to be updated (since new things are coming)! Thank you so much for being interested enough in my writing to ask this it means so much! Sorry again for the late answer!
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Masterlist (So Far)
Fanfiction Discography
Outer Banks
Rafe Cameron -
Breakfast at Tiffany's
SERIES
I Want You To Like Me
Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four
JJ Maybank -
What A Cheat
Need Any Help?
Stranger Things
Eddie Munson -
SERIES
Someone That Actually Likes Me
Part One
The Vampire Diaries
Klaus Mikaelson -
TBD
Marvel
Peter Parker/Spiderman -
Just Thought I'd Drop In
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Omg! I love “I want you to like me” so much! Do you know when chapter 3 will be posted?
This made my day thank you so much for reading it and enjoying it! It's one of my favorites to write for and I really think the next chapter is going to be one of my favorites because it'll have so much of just Rafe in it but we'll see... As for when it will be posted I'm hoping towards very soon if I'm able to get it done but if not I might write a quick and short one shot to hold people who are waiting over (it could take place prior to I Want You To Like Me) hmmmm.. you're giving me ideas lol
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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No pressure or anything just curious if Someone That Actually Likes Me was getting a second part like their date or something it's such a cute story. Thanks, hope you have a great day or night wherever you shall be in the world 💕💖
YES! It is! I am so sorry for the late reply! I'm working on it right now so it should be ready in the near future! I hope you have a great day or night or whenever you read this (if you read it again later too that I am also wishing you a great time then too) Thank you so much for reading!!!
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Requests Please
I loved that everyone enjoyed Eddie's "Someone That Actually Likes Me" Fic and a part two IS coming! As well as a third part to my Rafe "I Want You To Like Me" fic! So please stay tuned!
Recently I had to put writing on a very long hold to get a hold of my life outside a computer screen (*long groan* I wanna live in my writing) and I'm still trying to solidify a few things, but while I do so I would love having options to what you guys would really enjoy to read. Don't be shy to put it in my asks I will always try to get to it eventually (this definitely includes those who have already put requests in which I may or may not have started working on;)) This would 100% help boost my motivation!
I'm open to writing about most characters so really shoot your shot!
no smut sorry babes
okay thank you I am actually going to start writing right now love you all
-e
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Search For Pan - e.w.
one, out of a series of poems I did on the pjo series for a school project written 07/09/2022
Searching for something Only few believe To exist
Deep in the woods Where not even Your friends Can find you
Does believing make it true Feeling it? Trusting it?
The problem is You were right after all And no one Listened
Is it much too late To save something That no one Believes Can be saved
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oddlykilledghosts · 1 year
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Legend - e.w.
one, out of a series of poems I did on the pjo series for a school project written 07/09/2022
Legends never die They aren’t allowed to give up Or give in They are the heroes That cause the bright light In children’s eyes to prosper
Legends may not die But they tire They long for someone else to hold up the sky They do not want to pass the torch They want it extinguished
Legends wither They don’t get the sweet mercy of death Greeted at the doors to the Underworld They live They breathe They fight For a world Who does not offer them the same kindness
They stay alive In every breath A teller takes When they speak their story
And they long for the moment When they don’t have to be The hero
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