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Age Gaps in your 20s
The human brain is fully developed around the mid to late twenties. It's not like a switch flips on your 26th birthday, it's just a general age range.
In the US, 18 is a legal adult and when most graduate high school. The reason that number is so low is so we can send kids off to war and pretend it's their informed choice. The end of high school is the end of a significant kind of structure in your life. Maybe you extend this structure into college, maybe you go full-time into the workforce. Work is very different from school.
When I look at the younger age gaps that people like to argue about, I think of them in terms of "How long out of high school?" A 20 year old has 2 years experience out of high school, and the 25 year old she's dating has 7 years experience out of high school. They're probably in different places in life and I'm side-eying that 25 year old.
And let's say you study like hell for 4 years in college and get out by 22 into your starter job. You've gained education but are still a bit lacking in life experience. If a 28 year old who's been in that job for a while starts hitting on you, it's wrong! They have an established career already while you're just beginning yours. But we know SOMEBODY would say "Ummmm actually they're both adults? Are you calling the younger one stupid? Are you denying them agency?"
It's really hard to consider power dynamics when you're more naive than you realize, and you WANT something. It's hard to consider power dynamics when you're smart and accomplished and the older person is someone who you think you can handle. I wish I knew how to communicate that to young women because I wish someone had communicated it to me when I was that age.
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I think most of the people out there who hate Rowling so much have not actually read the essay that kicked everything off. Here's the source straight from her website; read it and form your own opinion. You might still hate her afterwards but at least you'll be doing it because it was YOUR decision, and not a determination based on someone else's review. 5 minute read.
Do you know where I can read jkr’s essay?
I sure do!
As much as I love J.K. Rowling's hilarious and scathing tweets, I like to reread her essay every once in a while to remind myself that THIS is what they hate her for.
#there was supposed to be an 'invasion' of radfem tags today so here's my contribution lol#jk rowling#jkr#fuck jkr#harry potter#radfem#radfems interact#radfems do touch#trans#transgender#transmasc#transfemme#nonbinary#pride#pride month#lgbt#lgbt pride#asexual#queer
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Have you, as a girl or woman, ever tried to play popular online games with voice chat among strangers? Counterstrike, TF2, Overwatch, whatever? It's sexual harassment central. Even when you're not being sexually threatened, you've still got the suckups and the men who talk down to you and assume you were looking for a mentor or something. The VIBES are OFF.
Your skill levels can all be equal here, but the atmosphere is not. It's not fun or engaging to have to deal with that treatment.
Please think about that the next time you complain about women wanting female-only leagues for things like chess and darts. They're sports where men have no physical advantage but they bring the mood down with their sexist attitudes that they may not even realize they have.
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I picked option 2, I'm already friends with several. How gender-critical can option 1 be if she's against women's rights? She probably just hates trans people; she's not gender-critical. This is a good exercise in seeing a person label themselves one thing but looking at their actions/beliefs and knowing the label doesn't fit.
if you had to choose who would you rather date or be friends with?
conservative neurotypical gender critical woman, christian, calls herself a tradwife and is anti abortion and women’s divorce rights and defends abusive men, but also believes in female spaces
autistic trans identified female who thinks gender is fake so she can identify how she wants and is supportive of most aspects of feminism except for the things that are ‘transphobic’ like single sex spaces
The options are too large to fit so please read them in the ask ^^
Thanks for the question Nona!
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We want to stand up against societal oppression on the basis of sex. Sex and gender are different.
As a feminist, there is literally nothing more embarrassing than having to be associated with the rampant transmisogyny of people who claim to be radical, free thinkers, who want to stand up against societal oppression on the basis of gender.
It’s like somehow you literally missed the whole point.
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I've got some pretty nice professional clothes that I'd like to donate. Does anyone have any suggestions for NON-RELIGIOUS women's orgs that could take them? I could try the religious ones next but I'd really like to avoid them if I can. I'm even tempted to drop them off at Goodwill before a Jesus-y place, if anyone has any opinions on that?
#i want them to go where they can do the most good#donation#radfems interact#radfems do touch#radblr#boost
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The animation was pretty funny and detailed. I'm glad there are female creators out there that do stuff like this (if they are actually women). But know that the people involved did those hehesilly comics that were very racist.
I don't claim these people as our allies. I don't even think they're feminists at all, especially after comics like this -
I don't trust them.
And then there's the other issue with labeling other people/yourself as "terf." When you do, you're giving power to a nonsensical label that was created to silence us, and you're defining your feminism by its relation to men. Just say you're a feminist if you actually care about fighting the root causes of women's oppression.
Racism and homophobia are significant factors that hurt our ability to achieve female solidarity so it's important to call out unacceptable behavior when you can.
TOTAL WOMAN VICTORY
https://youtu.be/IMgWnCMAigw?si=NFzM4O6gXhRBClSA
LMFAO THIS IS THE BEST ANIMATION IVE EVER SEEN 😭
TRAs could never be this creative I swear.
It made me happy seeing so many like minded queens in the comment section 🥲
More terfy animations please!!
#not to mention i have trouble stealthily reblogging good feminism posts to my alt accounts because the name has “terf” in it. c'mon people#radfems interact#radfems do touch#sillypoo
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Anon I appreciated your ask, I'll address it when I can, and preferably after the poll closes. It could open up an interesting discussion!
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An example of the bones comment,
PokemonGo recently rolled out an update to the avatars in an attempt to make them more customizable and inclusive. Left is old right is new.
Pros: Less sexualized female models. That's usually good in my book, makes me feel less objectified. There's also a slider for weight now so the body types are a little more diverse. All avatars can also now wear all the clothes, instead of the cool stuff being restricted to male models and the revealing stuff restricted to female models. (I really wanted to wear the clunky wader boots but couldn't as a woman.)
Cons: They attempted to create a "default" body, then added sliders to enlarge or shrink body parts like hips and boobs. But the default body was male (gasp). And they did not create sliders for hand/foot size or shoulder slope. So the above pics don't look terrible when they're not moving, but when they do it looks like a hunchbacked man skulking around with scary orangutan arms, no matter what you do to it because a male body is just not shaped like a female body even if you stick boobs on it. The skin tone selections looked all washed out and weird too.
Anyway there was a big backlash to it with most players, even the trans ones, saying the update turned everyone into men. I thought it was interesting that a lot of the trans-identified players expressed dismay that their avatar now looked more like them when they were actually after their anime-looking ideal.
Modern video game character creation doesn't let you pick between female or male anymore. Now it's "body type" and "silhouette" and "style" and "form" and "figure" with added "choose your pronouns" sometimes. Some good things came with it but generally it comes across as performative and weird, like we're all supposed to pretend sex doesn't exist for the sake of some. You have to wonder why a male driven industry, notorious for its objectification of women, would make this choice.
I've noticed that, although biological sex doesn't exist anymore, we still always know wich "figure" should cover her nipples and come with longer hair. And which one is the default body type, primary, A, number one. Spoiler alert: females are always the second choice. Of only two choices. That's why it looks performative.
I appreciate that the female and male characters can share characteristics like body hair and haircuts. It's just a shame we have to give up on being female in the process. I was surprised that even non western games find themselves following this trend. It speaks to how much of global entertainment is centered around pleasing white people I suppose.
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I remember a post on here pointing out that if women were supposedly so eager to falsely accuse men of sex crimes, we would have seen a significant uptick of it with the recent introduction of AI porn of real people. Like women would be making AI porn of themselves and saying a man did it, or using AI to create false evidence against them.
And yet, the most stories we've heard about it are about men using it against women. GUESS WHY.
by far the worst response to the bear hypothetical yet. women explain the very rational but grim "i would rather come across a bear in the woods than a man in the woods because worst case scenario the bear will kill me, the worst case scenario of the man is him kidnapping and torturing and raping me and all i would want to do in that situation is die instead" and a man will see this and go "a bear can't falsely accuse me of rape like a woman can so i would rather come across the bear" .. a bear can't accuse you of rape at all so what are you gonna try to do to that bear bro!!! we all know thered be a guy that tries to fuck it!!!!!!!!
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I also want to add on that I think it's a good thing that there's a word/idea that helps women say "no" to sexual experiences they don't want. That's good even if it's semantically incorrect. I'm pointing out that if we do use the correct words, we'll see that feminist discussion lies underneath for both actually-asexual women, and for women who DO experience sexual desire and deserve to talk about the many different reasons they choose not to have sex.
I'll repeat my last line, "IT'S OKAY TO HAVE STANDARDS THAT NO ONE IS MEETING."
When I am skeptical of a woman/girl labeling herself as asexual, I'm doing it from a feminist perspective.
How many times have we read of women saying some brainwashed bullshit along the lines of "Orgasming during sex isn't important to me, the special part is feeling close to my partner!" Or the whole conservative woman thing about "wifely duties" where sex is seen as maintenance of the relationship instead of something you enjoy together.
Women are taught by society that our pleasure and autonomy isn't a part of the bigger picture. The increased usage of the asexual label is an attempt to cope with that flawed sentiment instead of fighting it, in addition to women just plain not being attracted to people who don't enhance their lives.
Many of the women who call themselves asexual actually mean celibate (or wish they could be celibate), but that word carries baggage that they understandably don't want. If we want the word "asexual" to have meaning, it's important to focus on telling women that their pleasure DOES matter and it's okay to have standards that no one is meeting.
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Going to get a haircut and I see this - okay. ✔️
Going to pick up my Wednesday floppies from a comic book shop or browsing a retro video game selection - I am EXTREMELY skeptical. ❌
It's not that I don't think women can and should own those things, but typically we're pushed out of alt comix and tech spaces. 10 years ago I'd walk into there and be ogled and talked down to by greasy nerds. Now I walk in and am ogled and talked down to by the same exact nerds but they're calling themselves girls, wearing grandma sweaters, and putting on an Agent Pleakley voice.
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I don't understand how trans stuff isn't sexist.
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Y’all love talking about supporting and listening to black women until black African women talk about genital mutilation,rape, and breast ironing and y’all call them terfs
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If I had a nickel for every time a friend suddenly showed me the physical folder they'd filled with my doodles and silly notes, I'd have three nickels. And that's fantastic, I love these nickels! What a good life I have!
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What an awful, sexist thing to say. How are women into men, then? Can someone explain the inherent difference between how a woman would be attracted to a man and how a man would be attracted to a man?
Saw this on Twitter and I obligatory need to share it
#you just called a woman a queer for being attracted to men.#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#sexism#homophobia#ryoko kui#queer#daydream hour#i wonder how many girls have transitioned partially because they believed their normal sex drive was manly somehow
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not wanting to be a girl is usually a symptom of not being a girl...
actually, not wanting to be a girl is a symptom of being a girl in a patriarchal society. it is entirely normal to want to be seen as fully human in a world where you will never get that as a woman. the idea that not embracing my oppression somehow makes me less of a woman is deeply offensive and i’m going to politely ask you to fuck off.
#“getting upset at misogyny and wishing you could get away from it means you might not be a woman”#fuck you anon
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