book wesper is your first pet that you buy and it’s elegant, wise and regal. it’s name is something relating to that of a greek myth and it demonstrates just how strong and independent this animal is and the respect and love you hold for it, this animal would die for you and you would die for it, it makes you understand why certain religions bow down to these creatures and worship them so heavily

show wesper is the rabid cat you found on the side of the road one day and named Keyboard McKeyboardson, will throw themselves out of the five story building if left unsupervised for more than 5 seconds and is one sneeze away from having a heart attack but you will defend that scruffy, violent animal to the ends of the earth and if anyone tried to hurt it you pull a knife-

Nina: If I was a gardener I'd put out two-lips together.

Matthias, blushing: ...Nina

Wylan: Why can't we be like that?

Jesper: If I was a gardener you'd be my hoe.

Wylan: Fuck you.

Tolya: *sees Wylan and Jesper together* Tolya: They're cute. I would put them on a boat. Tamar: You mean... you ship them?

KAZ'S REACTION TO WYLAN AND JESPER KISSING WAS SO FUNNY. THAT SHIT HAD ME ROLLINGGG

I love how you can tell exactly when Wesper fanart was drawn depending on what the characters look like. If both Jesper and Wylan look book accurate(Jes with darker skin, Wylan with red hair), then it was probably before the Shadow and Bone series. If Jesper looks like Kit Young but Wylan still has red hair, then it is after season one but before Wylan’s casting was announced. If it’s literally just a drawing of Kit Young and Jack Wolfe then it was drawn sometime in the past 12 months.

Idk I just think that’s funny. Ik it’s lame I’m sorry.

my favorite ship dynamic is from strangers to lovers, two gay idiots, he kissed the wrong boy, healing from traumas together, and he met his father™, telling his appearance to tailor who is changing him back, blushing and staring, sharpshooter and runaway, grisha and merchling.

don't talk to me i am mourning and i am funeraling we deserved that spinoff

If Jesper and wylan were to get married then tolya has to be the one to perform the wedding ceremony

HE GOT HURT!!! WHY WAS THIS NOT DISCUSSED MORE!?!?!?!?! HE WAS ON THE GROUND!!!!

*cries in wesper*

That deleted scene 🥹💛

“I’m not a cheat! Counting cards is not cheating. Show me one game with rules against counting cards.”

“You can count cards? Why did I not know this? Why have we not made use of this? We could be rich. Richer than rich!”

“We are rich. Well, I’m rich. You’re in debt.”

but like imagine this, if there were deaths in a third soc book:

wylan would die first (from an explosion, oit of irony) because we can all agree he's like a son to kaz, and it would be devastating. so then kaz has all this pent-up emotion. and jesper's unhinged gambling addiction gets worse, which gets kaz even more worried. because he's like a brother to kaz. and he does something reckless on this job, which therefore gets him severely injured, and he dies in inej's arms. and that leads to inej trying to help jesper cope while also suffering internally herself.

when news reaches nina in ravka, she thinks that kaz forged inej's signature at the end of the letter as a cruel joke. she went along with it anyway since she missed when the crows were all together. nina brought a few traditional ravkan treats that she knew kaz liked no matter how much he denied it. when she arrived at the slat, it was empty. nina went to the crow club and found inej with a far away look. she gave up on trying to help jesper with his addiction. im too lazy to be in writing mode, so im gonna half-ass the rest. anyway, nina had to snap inej out of her daze and ask her where kaz was. that's when inej finally broke down, and any word she muttered was incoherent. after what felt like ages, jesper went over to the two girls and told nina what happened. "the ol' dirtyhands finally kicked the bucket. thought he was immortal for a while. wylan went just before him."

there was nothing else but sobs that day and screaming out to the sky why everything that happened happened. bit over a week later, there was a joint service. inej engraved two slabs for the two out of wood with the first knife kaz gifted to her. she renamed it. sankt rietveld. and that's how she got assigned a new job. revenge. with a gloved hand holding her knife. (shitty ending, not enough detail, but here you go)

before, there were six of crows. then five. now only three.

i originally shared this with a server im in and, therefore, was banished to hellgate by my friends for making them all cry. oops. anyway, fuck you guys [affectionately but not really].

Wylan: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Jesper: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Wylan: But you’re always acting stupid?

Jesper: …

Jesper: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

Kaz: You asked for a demo man I gave you a demo man

Jesper: BuT He HAs AlL HiS fINgErS