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nanaooyoo · 2 months

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cravity ot9 scenario

request for: @nctloverkpop. I switched up the themeing a bit but we came to an agreement about cravity scenarios wherein the boys help you get through a tough time. I had a lot of fun writing these and hope you and any one who sees this likes it and maybe feels comforted by it (sorry it took so long). Anyways enjoy ✨

warnings/headsup: discussions of mental health • no specific disorders named • depression • anxiety • woobin’s includes a very bloody lip • mentions of food • arguable depictions of self harm • hurt/comfort • 1.2k words average • 10.6k words total • gender neutral reader • angst if you squint • fluff • lightly proofread

couple scenarios: members x reader pt.I/I

❥Serim

Serim sat at the edge of the bed. He watched as you paced back and forth across the multicolored rug you had picked out just a few weeks ago. You shook out your wrists and loosened your fingers as Serim slowly raised and lowered his arms trying his best to redirect your breathing.

“In… and out… in… and out…” he tried his best to demonstrate and jog your memory on the techniques people had previously taught you. Today it was just taking a particularly long while.

“What’s the point! It’s not working!” You whined, continuing to pace the floor.

“It’ll work eventually, you just have to be patient.” Serim said.

“I don’t want eventually, I want now!” You mumbled to yourself, now stomping your feet on the carpet. “This sucks!” You moaned collapsing to the floor and rapidly chewing at your nails.

“It may suck but it’s totally normal.” Serim said “things are really hard on you right now, it makes sense to feel freaked out.”

You groaned and clawed at your hair. Serim’s ability to remain calm in almost any situation where you felt like you were losing your goddamn mind was somehow both comforting and infuriating. “Oh. My. God.” You muttered angrily under your breath. You could feel the tension in your bones. It travelled through you and settled amidst each of your joints making you feel like a poorly made and fractured wooden doll. You felt internally rusted like the bumper on an old car. “You’re driving me insane.” You whispered under your breath as quietly as you could.

“I heard that y’a know.”

You looked up from your crouched over position on the floor to see Serim standing up from the bed and coming over to crouch down next to you. His refusal and near inability to ever get mad at you was something that made you truly love him. It was one of the many reasons you had asked him to move in with you and pick new furniture, and appliances, and rugs, and so so so much more… but it was also something unfamiliar. You weren’t used to someone being so unbothered by all of your moods. You weren’t used to him not batting an eye when your whole body locked up. You weren’t used to someone immediately trying to take action and not running in the other direction when your ploys for stress relief became self-destructive. You weren’t used to Serim.

However you had to start getting used to him quickly, because he had already settled in with most of his stuff. You looked at him as he looked back at you, not a trace of animosity in his eyes. Serim simply waddled over to you, hunched over in the same position. With one hand lazily strewn across his knees and the other slowly patting your head. “Are you sure you don’t want to try the breathing again, and I mean actually try this time.” He looked at you expectantly waiting for some kind of response. Like two frogs squatting on a lily pad you two both sat there in silence for a moment. A very long moment.

You let out a long exasperated sigh and conceded “I’ll try the breathing exercises… again”.

He didn’t do a very good job of hiding it but Serim did his best to conceal the fact that he was beaming on the inside.

Later that night, the two of you had to sit down and have a long conversation about what it would be like living together. “As much as I love you and I want to be the one to take care of you, you know I can’t always be the one to remind you of what to do when you feel like you’re going to a dark place…” He said “Obviously I’m still going to be there for you… I just worry about what might happen when I’m gone for work or something” He confessed.

“I know… and I don’t want you to worry about me. I just feel like I’ve been dealing with a lot lately and I’ve been taking it out on you.” Your voice was low and meek and you looked down while saying it. “I feel like I’m self sabotaging in more ways than one.” You admitted.

“Well there’s nothing you could really do to sabotage our relationship.” Serim said earnestly reaching out a hand to grab yours and placing a gentle kiss on your cheek. “I just like you too much” he chuckled.

It took a couple hours to get you to feel calm again. Serim had to pull your hands away from your mouth to stop you from chewing your nails down to minute nubs more times than he could count, but his ardent love for you would have him standing around and trying his best to keep your wits about you forever and ever.

No matter how many breakdowns, or meltdowns, or freakouts he had witnessed it wasn’t enough to deter him from you because Serim knew that you would do the same for him. Despite your near constant refusal to take care of your own mental health, he had experienced all the times you had looked out for his. The many times you put his needs above your own made any attempt on your part to try and scare him away totally futile.

Serim watched as you steadied your breathing, before taking out some of your frustration on all the cardboard boxes that needed to be broken down and taken to the recycling bin. Whenever it seemed like your blood pressure would begin to rise again Serim would simply give you a comforting hug from behind, resting his head between your neck and shoulders, humming softly; his aura just had a way of rubbing off on you. Did that mean that this would be the last time the two of you would ever have to have these sorts of conversations on these sorts of days? Absolutely not. But that din’t mean you couldn’t look forward to having them together…

❥Allen

You had run out of tears long ago but that didn’t stop you from sniffling through belabored breaths as you laid on the couch. Of course Allen stuck close behind. One arm wrapped around your waist and the other propping up his head to get a better view of the TV.

It didn’t take him long to realize you weren’t really crying at the cheesy movie splayed across the television screen. You were more wrapped up with something else. You swore it was nothing, and to you, that may have really been true! Sometimes you got emotional or overstimulated for reasons you couldn’t really understand, even if your boyfriend knew that there probably was some underlying specific reason. The reason didn’t always matter, what mattered was how you felt in the moment, and right now you felt… well neither of you were quite sure how to feel?

“What’s wrong?” Allen whispered into your ear as he pulled you just a tiny bit closer.

“I really don’t know…” you said. You had been crying for so long that even if there was a reason for it in the first place you had forgotten it by now.

Allen snuggled closer to you as you did the same. Melting into his embrace and struggling to trace back the reason for your sadness, you still found it cathartic to let your emotions take over once in a blue moon.

Like a wave it washed over you at times though. You often had trouble experiencing your emotions but your emotions sure as hell had no trouble experiencing you. They had a way of taking you over that made it nearly impossible to focus on anything else while also making it incredibly difficult to pinpoint the triggers in the first place.

No matter what though, Allen always had a way of bringing you back to Earth. His calm and gentle demeanor, and carefree attitude made it so that you could always be yourself around him. Even if that self you needed to be wasn’t very pretty at times, he was always there taking notes and remembering things on how to help you better cope with your feelings the next time, and the next time…

Sometimes your big heart and structureless brain hindered you, sometimes they made life harder. But sometimes those things brought you to people like Allen.

The first time you ever cried in front of him felt mortifying! You were a complete blubbering mess and yet he still wanted to go out with you.

“Everybody cries” he had told you, no sense of irony in his voice.

“Yeah but I cry like… a lot” you responded.

All he did was shrug.

Now here you two were, almost a year later and you were still a self prescribed crybaby. Though, Allen didn’t like it when you called your self that, he found it demeaning and reductive but he also could acknowledge that you did cry! A lot! Not that it made him like you any less it just made him want to look after for you extra hard.

Allen lightly patted your stomach in a delicate rhythm making sure to not pull too much attention to the ways in which he was trying to comfort you. Of course he was letting you cry (or at least try to) for as long as you needed and he hummed softly in time with his small taps, subtly helping you focus on something other than whatever thoughts were running around up in your head. He really was helping, you just didn’t realize it. He was so good at helping without you realizing in fact, that it took him a good amount of time to notice that you weren’t awake anymore.

“Hey do you want to maybe watch something else?” He asked no longer hearing sniffling and wondering if that would make you want to move on the something more cheerful. “Or do you want to… cry some more?” He asked quietly peeking his head over yours to get a good look at your face. “So cute” he audibly cooed seeing your puffy cheeks and eyes squished against the soft fabric of the couch with your mouth slightly agape. “You poor thing.” He said to himself with more affection in his voice than any sort of pity.

Allen did his best to unlatch his arm from under you and move his legs that had found themselves intertwined with yours. He carefully wormed his way off of the couch and onto the carpet as quietly as possible. He reached an arm out to place it under your head and support your neck before pausing when you started fidgeting around again.

You always were prone to talking in your sleep. “Allen…” you muttered unconsciously, repeating his name a few times before flopping over fully asleep and snoring again.

Your boyfriend did the gentlemanly thing and supported your head before scooping you up and bringing you to his room. He made sure you were extra comfortable, covering every inch of you except the very top of your head in the biggest, fluffiest blanket he could find. You pawed at the blanket pulling it closer and Allen pushed some pillows into your arms as you began surrounding the pile of softness and fabric in your tight grip. You hugged them as if it were your boyfriend, none the wiser in your asleep state. Allen gave you a small peck on the part of your forehead that was still visible and quietly tiptoed out of the room.

He made sure to check on you every once in a while and rub your back or whisper something to you softly whenever you began tossing and turning again. He was used to regularly helping you fall back asleep when you had restless nights or night terrors so this was a walk in the park for him.

The next morning you awoke to utter darkness before clawing your way out of the cocoon Allen had made for you. The sheer white curtains in his room billowed in the morning breeze as you rolled over and noticed a small glass of water and a little pharmacy bag on the nightstand next to you. You had no idea when he had the time to slip out and get those as it was still quite early in the morning but all that crying, and tossing, and turning always gave you the most viscous headache. You wasted no time in sitting up and taking the pain medicine from the little parcel and taking a big swig of water.

A few minutes later the door to his room ever so slightly creaked open as Allen did his best to quietly shimmy through the doorway. “Oh you’re awake! Sorry I didn’t get breakfast or anything I assumed you’d be out for a little while longer.”

You stuck out your bottom lip pouting and wordlessly outstretching both of your arms signaling with your hands for him to come over. He complied, hopping up onto the bed and giving you a giant bear hug. He pulled back to look at you as more tears welled up in your eyes but these ones were more positive. You always appreciated how caring Allen was, how quickly he would move to help you without a second thought and without him, you wondered how miserable an entire nighttime of crying alone followed by a morning of throbbing headaches you had to deal with all by yourself would have been. You hugged him tightly, showing your appreciation the best you could as Allen leaned back to wipe some of the tears out of your eyes, worry fading and turning into a quiet chuckle as he realized you were now mostly okay.

Allen looked over at his phone “yeah we’ve still got so much of the day left, do you want to sleep more?” You nodded and hugged him tighter planting a small kiss on his neck. “Do you want me to join you?” He asked.

“Of course!” you chimed, voice still groggy but incredibly sincere.

❥Jungmo

Jungmo sat on the couch scrolling on his phone and playing with the collar of his tie as he waited for you to get ready. He hated having to dress up just to go to stuffy places and talk to a bunch of boring people and executives all night, but he had been invited to an upscale event and was required to go. At least he didn’t have to go alone, you were always down to join him in the things he found so boring, always whispering jokes and sharing drinks together in the corner of the room. He was excited to see what you would be wearing too! That was one of the few things helping him get excited for tonight. You were taking a little longer than usual to get ready but you also had an incredibly extensive closet and the biggest collection of accessories he had ever seen so he didn’t want to rush you. I mean, he didn’t want to rush you, but you guys were cutting it close if you took too much longer. “Y/N you almost done?” He asked walking over to the bathroom where you were supposed to be finishing up. “We can have like ten or fifteen more minutes but then we should probably g- Oh! You’re already ready!” He said barging into the bathroom and looking at you as your palms were placed flat on the counter and you stared into the mirror. “Wait, let me take a picture first, you look great!” He said excitedly.

You placed your hand over his phone and gently pushed it down. You shook your head and sighed. “No I don’t…” you trailed off.

Jungmo looked baffled. “What do you mean? You look amazing!” He said standing a little closer.

“Well I don’t feel amazing.” You retorted.

Jungmo took a second to take you in. He looked you up and down and then cocked his head to the side like a confused puppy. “Why not?” He asked. “I think you look incredible!”

You bowed your head and let out an exasperated groan. “Something’s just off… I just don’t look right.”

To him you looked breathtaking! Gorgeous enough to make him forget you two were supposed to be somewhere else in a few minutes time. “What’s off?”

“Just like… all of it!” A sad expression plastering your face. You rolled your eyes a bit every time you caught a glimpse of your own reflection in the bathroom mirror and huffed in annoyance at a problem you felt like couldn’t be fixed. “I can’t let anyone see me like this…” you said.

“I see you like this-“ Jungmo replied “and I like what I see.” He smiled.

“Yeah but your opinion doesn’t count you would have said that no matter what.”

“My opinion should be the only one that counts!” He said “Especially when you’re being way too hard on yourself.” Jungmo rubbed small circles onto your back in an attempt to encourage you. “Where’s all this coming from? Do I not tell you how good you look enough?”

“You tell me plenty!” You scoffed “it’s just something about this outfit, something about-“

“Then we’ll change the outfit. You’ve got plenty of stuff in your closet you barely ever get to wear!” Jungmo grabbed your hand but you stood still as a statue stopping him from dragging you away.

“That’s easy for you to say… you look great in everything.” You looked down at the floor.

Jungmo pouted. “The only reason I look good in everything is because you pick out all my clothes. I’d look a mess without you” he laughed.

You nodded your head in acknowledgment but still you weren’t fully convinced “maybe you should just go without me.”

“Go without you, are you crazy?” Jungmo furrowed his brows in complete shock. “When could I ever- how could I ever go to one of these boring corporate events without you?” He boomed. “I’m your boyfriend! Either we’re both going or neither of us are going!” He said unusually sternly for his laid back nature. “It’s up to you whether you want to stay or you want to go but either way I’m doing it with you!” He said. “And if this is all just over one outfit that’s an easy fix. We can be late, let’s go pick something else out.”

“Jungmo… I want to go with you I really do, but I just don’t want to drag you down…”

“You have got to stop saying stuff like this” he said. “You look great! You always look great! Even if you’re not feeling great I promise you no one in the world can tell but you… and maybe me on a good day.” He joked.

“You really don’t think I look awful?” You asked genuinely worried.

“It’s be impossible for you of all people to look awful.”

You sighed taking one more look back at yourself in the mirror. You still didn’t think you looked quite right and even just thinking of your reflection made you feel queasy, but if Jungmo thought you looked good then maybe you really did. You still wanted to change clothes though. The fabric all of a sudden felt constricting on your skin, it felt like a million tiny mites were crawling all over you. “Okay I’ll go change.” You said patting Jungmo’s chest and exiting the bathroom. He followed you out and to your bedroom where you began rifling through your closet looking for something else to wear that still matched your boyfriend and felt appropriate for the event. He stood there watching you for a moment.

“Do you need any help?” He asked.

“No, no I can do this myself. It’s more of a mental thing anyways, I won’t take too long”. You looked back for a second as Jungmo was still standing there watching you. “Can you go wait for me in the living room?” He didn’t budge.“Jungmo! Go wait outside.”

He looked surprised “Oh you’re serious.

“Yes I’m serious, I’m feeling kind of self conscious right now…” you said in earnest.

“Why though, it’s nothing I haven’t seen befo- Ouch that hurt!” Jungmo said taking a wadded up dress shirt to the face. “Okay fine I’ll wait for you in the living room” he said trudging off and rubbing his eye in slight irritation.

A few minutes later you reappeared into the common area of the apartment dressed in all new clothes. Jungmo smiled and clutched his phone once more. “Better?” He asked.

“Better!” you said.

“Now can we take a picture?” His eyes gleamed with hope as he swayed back and forth on the balls of his feet.

You hesitated for a moment. “Yeah sure, why not.”

Jungmo quickly grabbed your hand and raised his phone up to snap a few selfies of him kissing you on the cheek before you both rushed out the door. He still made sure to keep a tight clasp on your hand however. He also made sure to check in every so often as to how you were feeling. Most importantly, he made sure to keep reminding you of how good you looked all night. Even if you didn’t see it, even if you didn’t believe, even if your mind tried to convince you otherwise, Jungmo made sure to always be there as a ‘pick me up’ to make sure you were reminded of the reality right in front of you. The reality of having a partner that saw you for who you really were and would never falter when it came to reminding you of that.

❥Woobin

You placed your hand on the arm rest of the passenger’s seat and tapped your fingers in quick and nervous succession as Woobin held your other hand and started up the car. He whistled along to the radio and swayed his head to whatever ‘summery’ ballad was currently playing and set up the navigation app on his phone in blissful ignorance.

Since the weather had finally started warming up a mutual friend had invited the two of you over for a big get together. Though it was a relatively casual engagement, you still felt that all too familiar sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach. The feeling you got every time you were about to ride a roller coaster, give a presentation, get lost on a hike, or in cases like these; go somewhere with a whole lot of people. You pulled at and fidgeted with the hem of your pants, letting go of the arm rest and aimlessly searching for some sort of cord or loose thread to pull on. You swallowed harshly feeling a lump form in your throat as Woobin absentmindedly rubbed his thumb across your knuckles with his free hand as he began to drive.

You could feel your heart rate rise as your body temperature did the same before quickly dropping again and again. You could’ve sworn you were sweating but turning on the A/C in the car felt like way too much. Your hands started to feel clammy as you looked over at Woobin who quickly glanced over to give you a warm smile before focusing his attention back on the road. His general sense of calm and the beautiful weather should have been enough to calm you down but it wasn’t really working. All you could focus on was the noise of tires scraping the road, the blaring music, the sunlight that was shining directly into your eyes, and how warm you felt. Or were you cold? You couldn’t really tell but what you knew for sure was that you did not feel good.

You almost started to feel nauseous as the car grazed over a tiny pot hole and your vision began to fog over a bit. You felt dizzy like you needed to sit down, but restless like you needed to just stand up and run all at the same time. You wanted to say something, and every time you looked over at Woobin you were almost compelled to, but for some reason or another the words just couldn’t escape your mouth.

“Are you okay?” Woobin’s voice rang out a little delayed in your ears but eventually registering properly.

You felt sick, you felt like garbage, you felt terrible! So of course you replied quickly “yeah I’m doing fine, I’m excited!” You said practically through gritted teeth, a cheesy grin plastered on your face. Why you lied? You had no clear idea. What you did know was that lying to him made you feel worse.

You chewed at your lip furiously as you often did when feeling anxious. You let out fast paced yet silent breath out through your nose and tried your hardest not to tap your feet in frustration. Your lips felt near swollen but you couldn’t stop biting. You bit, and bit, and bit until all you could taste was the metallic tasting saliva pooling on the tip of your tongue. Before you knew it, you were looking down as small red droplets dripped from the bottom corner of your lip and into the creases amongst woven denim of your pants “shit” you muttered to yourself. You just sat there and watched for a moment in a silent daze before speaking up. “Uh Binnie can we stop the car?”

“Yeah sure. Why?” He replied quickly adjusting his turn signal and pulling over into the farthest possible lane without hesitation.

As soon as the car stopped you turned to make awkward eye contact with your partner as he gazed in worry at the beet red complexion of your lips. “What happened?” Woobin scrambled to grab some tissues out of the glove compartment and wipe at your face. “When did you start bleeding? Why didn’t you say anything earlier?” He said eyes darting around looking for a cotton ball, or bandage, or anything of the sort. “Your jeans…” he said softly but still continued his frantic search.

“I think I’m gonna pass out.” you uttered plainly, stopping your partner in his tracks. You watched his dark brown eyes widen like saucers and then fill themselves with a new sense of determination!

Before you knew it you were sitting on a curb by the side of the rode near some random convenience store. Woobin returned shortly thereafter with a cold bottle of water, a first aid kit, and some tissues. He wasted no time in fixing up your lip and taking some solvent from the first aid kit to wipe at the little stains on your pants. He worked diligently sitting on the curb next to you, an array of medical materials strewn about. Watching him so focused helped calm you down a little bit, but you still weren’t feeling entirely better.

“Are you hurt anywhere else?” He asked nervously searching every inch of visible skin he could find on you.

You grabbed his hands and looked him in the eyes. “Babe I’m okay now.”

You could see the apprehension in the befuddled stare he gave you.

“Really, I mean it. I’m okay now!” You repeated.

Woobin swallowed a little bit and took a moment to gauge the look in your eyes before crushing you with a hug and rubbing your back as you both sat on the ground by the car. “Alright I believe you” he said before letting go and giving you a second to catch your breath.

You two decided to take a moment to enjoy the fresh air before getting back into the car. It really was a beautiful day out. There was a perfect amount of breeze and just the two of you sitting together made you feel much more at ease.

You both enjoyed your time in the sunshine looking up at the sky and taking in the tranquil scenery. “Look at that one it kind of looks like a cuddly bear doesn’t it”. Woobin giggled pointing at a cluster of clouds arranged ever so perfectly in the shape of a bear’s head with two perfectly fluffy cheeks and round ears to match. Finally, the cars didn’t feel so loud, and the air didn’t feel so stuffy. Woobin pointed up at the sky while expertly unscrewing the cap and placing a bottle of water in your hands without you noticing.

“Yeah it does, it looks a lot like you” you joked taking a swig of water and cooling down.

About half an hour later the two of you had your fill of pointing out silly shapes in the clouds and had stopped back into the store to grab some well deserved treats. Re-positioning himself at the wheel, Woobin took his phone off the dashboard and slipped it into his pocket.

“What about the party, don’t you need the directions up still?”

“Nah… let’s just go home, you’ve had enough socializing for the day.” He said clasping your hand once more and giving you a knowing smile.

❥Wonjin

“Alright… shower? Check. Breakfast, lunch, and dinner? Check. Room clean? Check-“

“Do we really have to do this Wonjin”. You groaned loudly, leaning your head back over one of your dining room chairs as Wonjin sat across from you and peered at your contorted face through the top of the frames of his glasses.

He took a deep breath “Y/N we really do.” He said clicking his pen and running it down the different elements of a check list.

“It feels so… silly It makes me feel like fucking kid!”

“Well it works doesn’t it?” Wonjin said.

“Can’t we do something else? You know like a normal couple…”

“We are a normal couple! We just have a system and the system works, so we have to keep doing it.” He replied not looking up from his official looking clip board.

You sneered a little in response “Why though…”

You and Wonjin had implemented a new process into both of your nightly routines where you would sit down and check off all of the necessary things you needed to do to function throughout any given day. Most of the things seemed intuitively simple but you and him both knew better than anyone else that one bad mood could send you into a spiral that prevented you from getting such simple things as grabbing the mail from your mailbox done once a week. If you were feeling down, you were dismal. It made it impossible for you to remember to take care of yourself when you had other things going on so Wonjin drafted up a list of some of the most basic things you needed to do each day. Things that came incredibly naturally to others but not so much to you. Wonjin made sure to get all the proper materials to make the process seem more legitimate to you. He got a special list typed up and laminated, dry erase markers for the fridge, brand new pens, a clipboard, sticky notes, and a tiny box full of trinkets and treats. You didn’t appreciate the machinations of his executive brain but that was okay, he was really proud of himself. He was especially proud with the box he had gotten. Not only would you get to reach in and grab a small reward each night but Wonjin would get one too if you completed all your tasks so that he could be more encouraged to help you. Not that he really needed any material incentive. This was something he would have done for you anyways, but making it a collaborative effort made you feel a little less alone.

The rewards inside the box were quite small but they were still enough to round out the rest of your night very positively. It was mostly full of stickers, charms, small bills, and little slips of paper with things like ‘have dessert a second time’ written on them. It was a crudely decorated little thing, covered in glitter glue and plastic gems with a picture from your anniversary stuck to the inside. The gifts may have been small but they still managed to brighten you up a bit even if you felt childish having to be monitored so closely.

You gave him a hard time about it but it really was helpful how Wonjin took the initiative in making sure you got things done. He got tired of always asking you about your day and not loving what he heard. At first you objected to the idea of a to do list being of any help to you and your mental health, but it was frustrating how well it worked.

Wonjin raised a single eyebrow and looked back over at you. “So I’m assuming you don’t want to pick anything from the special prize bin today?” He said.

“It’s not a ‘special prize bin’ it’s a cheap wooden jewelry box from the craft store.” You said.

“Well I’m gonna pick something from the special prize bin.” Wonjin made a big show of closing his eyes reaching into the box and rummaging his hand around in there for a while before pulling something out and immediately hiding it. He quickly hid his hands under the table and looked at something tucked away within his palms.

“What’d you get?” You asked slightly disinterested but still leaning over the table to better see what he grabbed.

“Uh-uh, no way. You didn’t wanna pick anything” Wonjin said sticking out his tongue at you. “Not my fault you didn’t want a prize.”

“If I pick something will you let me see what you got?” You asked.

“I don’t know…” he said “I think you deserve a prize but if you don’t think you deserve one that’s not on me.”

“I don’t deserve a prize for eating dinner…” you bit your lip and looked down.

“Of course you do! But I’m still not showing you what I got until you pick something…”

“Fine.” You said reaching for the box. Wonjin excitedly cracked it open for you just enough to reach your hand in and mull around for something that felt… right. You dug around for a bit and pulled out a chunky metal heart charm. “Cute enough.” You said to yourself. “Now what did you get Wonjinnie?”

Wonjin pouted and furrowed his brows. “Wait no I want to trade, you’ll like mine more anyways!” He said trying to grab the charm from you before you pulled your arms away.

“Since when have we ever done that?”

“Since now!” He said brows still fervently knitted together. Wonjin placed a little gachapon figurine on the table and offered it to you. You weren’t exactly sure who or what it was, but you did recognize that it was a character from one of his favorite comics.

“Why would I want something that was so clearly meant for you” you asked. “All I got was some like.. brecelet charm?”

“Just because.” Wonjin said, and you noticed his face redden a bit.

“Okay, okay fine…” You said and handed over the charm. The figure was pretty cute anyways and it reminded you of your boyfriend, so it wasn’t a big deal.

Wonjin would never admit why he was feeling so shy but he was glad you had just dismissed your prize and traded with him. If your eyes had been a little keener you might have noticed the small latch on the ‘charm’ you had picked out and realized it was actually a locket. Inside was a small picture of you as a kid smiling big, holding some sort of old stufffed animal. You hated looking at your childhood pictures for some reason, maybe because it brought back unpleasant memories, or maybe because it reminded you of a time in your life when you didn’t need a list to keep your mental stability in check, but Wonjin loved those pictures all the same. No matter how goofy you looked he loved them because he loved you and a little locket was the perfect gift to get him ready to do this all over again tomorrow. Even if you whined and complained, you just being here to complain, alive and well was what he really needed…

❥Minhee

Chores were always a thing that calmed you down, and as much as he might’ve hated doing them… Minhee loved you more.

You hadn’t spoken a word to each other in hours. You were diligently refolding and reorganizing each and every single article of clothing in your dresser drawers and closet. Why you had to be doing this on a beautiful Saturday afternoon he had no idea, but he was helping you anyway.

The weirder, more tedious, and unnecessary a chore was the bigger the issue you were currently dealing with. Sure it was a bit of a drag to be spending an hour and a half washing dishes, or in this instance multiple hours folding and ironing clothes but he preferred this to the ways you would try to divert stress when he had first met you.

Back then it would have been impossible for you to take breather without punishing yourself in some way but Minhee’s willingness to just tag along and do whatever you were already doing really helped you feel comfortable amidst the internal mayhem. For Minhee doing chores was a form of punishment but to you it was pure bliss.

You would often have periods of time where you just couldn’t get words out, to anyone, no matter what they were or no matter why you wanted or needed to say to them, but as a quiet person himself, Minhee didn’t feel totally uncomfortable in the silence. He liked the way the two of you could just be together, existing in the same space simply able to enjoy each other’s company. For each of you the presence alone of the other felt so grounding.

Minhee remembered a long time ago when you had told him that it was enough for him to just ‘be around’ and that made you feel better. It was then that his crush on you grew tenfold and he just knew he had to tell you about it. Of course he never did, he was too shy, but you guys had ended up together anyways!

It was times like these, where he sat crosslegged in front of your tidy ironing board, creasing out only a few wrinkles on some your clothes, that he was reminded of how you truly felt about him without having to say it with words. Even when you were struggling and couldn’t find the strength to speak, the way your pinky would ever so slightly graze his when passing garments back and forth or how your eyes would shoot up and follow his every movement every time he got up to walk away.

No matter what he would always say something along the lines of “Don’t worry I’m not going anywhere.”

If Minhee said he’d be back in a minute, not even sixty-one seconds could pass before he would make his way back to you. It always broke his heart and simultaneously endeared him the way your puppy like eyes would wordlessly follow him around a room, or how still you’d sit upon waiting for him to come back. But he aways did come back, so you didn’t have to worry.

Your fingers worked with an almost mathematical precision going through every t-shirt, every pair of pants, every button up, every pair of socks, everything! He never thought the time would come but eventually the two of you finished.

It almost startled him when you spoke for the first time in ages even though your voice was so soft and low. “Do you want me to do yours?” You asked genuinely, while placing the last piece of clothing onto a hook and shutting the closet door.

‘Could you be any more adorable…’ He thought to himself. “That’s okay Y/N” He said and walked over squishing your cheeks between his palms and peppering kisses all across your face. “Do you wanna talk about why we just spent four hours reorganizing your already perfectly organized clothes?” He cocked his head to the side and looked down at you. “-And why you want to do even more…”

You looked down in shame “I think I just want to be distracted right now. I feel like I need to be doing something… just anything…”

Minhee understood what that meant. There were times when talking was helpful and very necessary and there were other times were those conversations needed to be put off until later. Sure it tore him up a little bit inside that you didn’t immediately feel comfortable telling him what was wrong but he also would much rather you be keeping yourself busy and enjoying his company than locking yourself away. There were times when you would be so far gone that even if he physically shook you, you couldn’t reach him. There were times when the silence wasn’t a comfortable understanding but rather, a sinister creeping energy that loomed over the both of you stopping you from being to able to experience anything in that moment. Sometimes it scared him the way your mind could so easily take you away from him, but it impressed him all the more when you could pull yourself out. He was always with you every step of the way, charging uphill to make you feel better. And if what would make you feel better right now was going through all of his laundry then that’s what the rest of this Saturday would be made to do.

“We can do mine… my hamper’s full of stuff anyways!” He said.

“Thanks Minhee.” You said “Okay go get your basket, I’m already getting antsy!”

You appreciated how easily he could flip the script and just go along with whatever you needed in that moment. “I owe you ice cream or something…” You said trying your best to sound chipper.

Minhee trudged over with his enormous pile of laundry and gave you a playful scoff “You owe me more than just ice cream. You owe me whatever four hours worth of food is!”

You let out a small laugh “I promise I’ll wake up early tomorrow morning and cook you something that takes at least four hours to make. You can enjoy your Sunday morning by sleeping in.”

“Alright deal!” He said. Knowing full well that he would make himself wake up just as early as you so he could help you in the kitchen. “I’m toootally gonna enjoy sleeping in!”

❥Hyeongjun

You absolutely hated work! Not just work in general, but the work that you had to do specifically. Coming home from a long day at your job always left you drained. Your boss was always micromanaging, and your coworkers loved any and all types of gossip at your expense. It didn’t help that you were the youngest in the office either. It was nearly impossible to stick up for yourself without later receiving some sort of reprimand in the form of extra hours with no extra pay. Almost every weekday had you returning home absolutely exhausted. You’d slip your shoes off at the door and lazily slip your work attire off piece by piece leaving a trail of clothes on the floor before taking a nice long hot shower. After your shower, there was no guarantee you’d be energetic enough to make dinner so you’d rummage around in your fridge and just eat the first thing you saw. On particularly bad days you would immediately lay on the couch entering a state that was borderline catatonic. Some nights it felt like you only had time to lay on the couch for a minute and blink your eyes a few times. Before you knew it, the sky was a tiny bit brighter and the alarm on your phone was going off again signaling to you that it was now the start of another long day. Begrudgingly getting up and beginning to get ready was always incredibly difficult, but recently right before you walked out the door you would get a little text of encouragement every day.

You had only gone out on about three and a half dates (one of them was cut short due to a last minute call from your boss) but Hyeongjun was already so in tune with your schedule. It might’ve partially been because you complained about work so much that he had just picked up on it that way, but his little digital pep-talks always had a way of putting a smile on your face. Even on the darkest of days. It’s like he sensed when a day was going to be more difficult than any of the others because his messages were always the sweetest the mornings right before you experienced hell.

Hyeongjun made you feel like color had re-entered the world. Life had felt so black and gray for so long and you couldn’t remember the last time you had been excited to talk to someone. He was always cheerful but not too cheerful, empathetic yet discerning, reasonable but always kind, and he had such a way with words. You didn’t think you’d ever find another person who could find the joy hidden beneath all your sadness but Hyeongjun seemed like the one.

Even though you hated work you also hated the one break from work you got during the day. Your lunch break was usually spent sitting alone in your car for forty-five minutes staring off into space and waiting for the day to be done. Whenever you felt down you tended to lose your appetite and that had been the case the past couple of weeks. You knew you should have been hungry and you almost were, you could tell from the way your belly would growl every once in a while. However, your brain and the rest of your body just couldn’t and wouldn’t let you even stomach the thought of food. Sometimes you’d listen to the radio but other times you’d just sit there looking out the window but not really taking any of it in. Sometimes Hyeongjun would message you on your break to ask what you were eating or what you were doing to kill time and you couldn’t bring yourself to come up with a good enough lie, so you would just be honest and tell him ‘nothing’. It nearly baffled you how you could give him almost nothing, you could give him so little to work with and he could so easily keep the conversation going!

You were sure today was going to be another one of those days. You sat at your desk entering some pointless data into a spreadsheet reminding yourself of one of the messages your crush had sent you that morning. You were already halfway through the day, you could do a few hours more right?

Suddenly right before you were about to go on break you heard a series of little taps right above your head. You looked up to see Hyeongjun smiling widely at you, fingers gripping the top of your computer monitor. You looked around shocked for a second making sure that this was real. “What are you doing here?” You asked eyes wide.

“I’m here to hang out with you duh!” Hyeongjun stepped around your desk to grab your bag and sling it around his shoulder. He took your jacket off of the back of your uncomfortable office chair and held it out as if to put it on you.

There were a few odd stares from your coworkers but they didn’t pay the two of you much mind. You stood up and let the boy happily put your jacket sleeves over your arms and give you a quick side hug.

Hyeongjun looked away shyly for a moment. “You seemed so bummed out over the phone yesterday I hope you don’t mind me stopping by.”

You took a moment to think. Was it too early for things like this? Should you be more apprehensive? You felt uneasy for a moment but that feeling quickly dissipated as Hyeongjun flashed you a big toothy grin. “Of course I don’t mind” you said.

Taking the elevator down was awkward in the same way sitting in class next to the person you liked as a kid was awkward. The butterflies in your abdomen danced and your stomach did acrobatic flips and Hyeongjun’s pinky inched closer and closer to yours before wrapping around your hand and holding it gently. He didn’t say a word but the way his lips pressed into a thin line to prevent him from smiling told you all you needed to know. You had no idea how he knew that a little bit of surprise and the slight change in routine was exactly what you needed to uplift your mood. Your outlook had been so bleak as of late and you weren’t sure who you could talk to about how you were feeling, but you were pretty sure the man holding your hand right now was a step in the right direction.

Hyeongjun would never tell you but he had spent countless night just laying in his bed thinking about you and researching ways to help. Even if you didn’t say it out right he didn’t need to be told directly that you weren’t feeling like yourself for a very long time. You were complex and he felt like there was still a lot more of you to unpack and he planned on spending the next forty-five minutes getting you to open up to him whether you wanted to or not!

❥Taeyoung

“I’m baaack!” Taeyoung shouted loudly hoping to get your attention as quickly and abruptly as possible. He thought it was sort of strange the way he didn’t immediately hear a response, but what he thought was even stranger was when he saw no tiny beam of light leaking out from underneath the bedroom door. Usually his sign that you were home was the little ray of light illuminating his feet as he approached your room but now it was just dark. Your shoes were by the door, keys hanging on the hook in the exact same way they were when he had left. Those seemed to be the only signs that you were probably even here. He went to quietly turn the doorknob tiptoeing and slinging his backpack over his shoulder to avoid the noise it made as it dragged on the hardwood floors. Maybe you were napping? It was getting dark outside but it was still only the late afternoon. Normally at this time, you were absorbed into a new book or something like that. However, upon entering the room things really were just as he had left them, you included. Curled up in the same amorphous blob, room pitch black, curtains drawn, phone plugged into the charger and resting on the nightstand. Taeyoung checked his watch to make sure the jet lag hadn’t completely screwed up his sense of time. He looked at the screen of his watch and then back at the giant mass of grey comforter on the bed. “Are you really sleeping it’s only like 4PM…” he said dropping his bag onto the now plush carpet beneath the bed and crawling up beside you.

He sat up on his knees and peeked over the pile of a person next to him and gently shook the covers to see if you were actually there. He could feel your form underneath the blanket but you still didn’t say anything, no release of breath, no snoring, no adorable sleepy mumbles… nothing! “Hey are you in a coma or something” he huffed playfully “you’re normally way more excited to see me!” That’s when he heard a small groan from under the covers, for a second he could have sworn it was the creak of the floorboards but now he was sure it was a noise from you. “I didn’t mean to bother you I just figured I’d come straight here since it’s been a- Oh!”

“Hey” you croaked out, voice hoarse and face mostly buried amid the covers. You turned over slowly to greet your boyfriend “How was the show?” You asked without the usual sense of genuine intrigue in your tone.

“It was… good. How’ve you been?” He said reaching over to move a bit of the comforter to ruffle your hair and pat your head. “You haven’t been like this since I left have you?” He chuckled, the corners of his eyes crinkling in glee and then faltering a bit as you looked away and wearily bit your dry lips.

“When did you leave again?”

“You haven’t been like this since I left? Right?” a smidgen of worry entering his tone and then a currant of realization. “Y/N, really?” a mix of familiar disappointment and general unease wafted over your boyfriend as he scooted closer and sighed. “The whole time?”

“I mean I got up to like pee once. I think…”

“Why didn’t you call me?” Taeyoung let a harsh breath escape his nose before running a hand through his already messy black hair. “You could have at least shot me a text...” He said bleakly.

“I didn’t wanna bother you.”

“When could you ever even begin to bother me?”

Your face contorted in shame and you sunk deeper into the soft fabric adorning your body. “I meant to at one point, I really did, but then I just… I don’t know-” You inhaled deeply eyes narrowing, brain struggling to focus on the task at hand, and heart struggling to connect to the conversation.

“You know I hate when you don’t tell me when you’re feeling bad.” He said.

“I just knew you’d probably try and like come home or something and I didn’t really feel like getting up to grab my phone.”

“You didn’t want me to come home?” Taeyoung’s pupils enlarged slightly as he scoffed quietly.

“Of course I wanted you to come home! I just didn’t want you to come home early!”

“So you just laid down here in the dark for like-” He stopped himself as he felt his emotions bubbling over. You two complemented each other in that way but it also made things difficult at times.

You were used to keeping things bottled up inside and Taeyoung was used to forcing you to talk about those things. Taeyoung was used to getting easily worked up and frustrated over the small stuff and you were used to offering some gentle perspective. He had a more aggressive approach to pulling you out of these “slumps” and it could come off as intense but he really just had no other way of showing you how much he cared. Sometimes he didn’t really get it. Sometimes he thought it would be so much easier for you to just get up, to just open the blinds, to just call him. It drove him crazy that he couldn’t be privy to all of the intricate details of your mind. It bothered him that a person so wonderful, so kind, so funny, and interesting, and charismatic, and personable… wasn’t able to share that with everyone all the time, especially with him. More than any bother though, more than frustration, more than annoyance, or anger, or any other negative emotion, you had helped Taeyoung further cultivate his arguably most beautiful trait; his empathy. Sure he was still a little shit stirrer every now and again but at the end of the day, seeing you just as upset over something you couldn’t control, how your mind and body were at odds constantly telling you that the one person who loved you most in this world shouldn’t be bothered with your issues made him just want to help you the best he could.

Taeyoung took a deep breath “Let’s go for a walk while the sun’s still out, how about that.” He suggested. “Also maybe shower first…”

You wanted to object but as you mulled over your answer your boyfriend couldn’t help but reach his hands under the duvet to try and pull you out, tickling you in the process.

“Okay, okay!” You laughed as Taeyoung giggled and continued to try and pull you out. “I can get up myself jeez…” You still weren’t feeling your best but the hopeful look on the man beside you’s face made you want to make him happy.

“Sorry for raising my voice at you I just wanted to make sure you were okay and I freaked out seeing you so-”

You cut him off “it’s okay, I’ll be okay. I’ve just been really tired and stuff. I should have called you.”

“Next time…” Taeyoung said as you sat up and he tackled you into a tight hug. “Maybe we can even lay here together for a couple more minutes, better yet let’s just go on a walk tomorrow I’m tired too…”

❥Seongmin

“Are you gonna be done soon…” Seongmin asked cheek pressed against the doorway and lips pursed in minor annoyance.

More than annoyance however, he felt concern. His face squished against the wooden frame of the entrance to your makeshift office (the desk in the corner or your shared bedroom). Normally this would have been about the fifth time in the hour Seongmin would come over to disturb you while you were working, but this past week and a half had been pretty different. He had seen you like this before, completely absorbed in your work, tired and distracted… but now it felt more like you were purposefully over working yourself. You weren’t just absorbed in work, but completely overwhelmed by it, more than tired you were utterly sleep deprived, you weren’t even really distracted you were just distracted when it came to him. Seongmin was pretty used to having your undivided attention or at the very least viciously demanding it. You found it cute the way he always wanted to be at your side making you laugh or just watching your expressions as you listened to a story he told. It was one of the reasons he loved you so much. Your willingness to include each other in just about anything the other was doing without it even really being necessary was what endeared him to you in the first place. Though, that made it all the more upsetting when you couldn’t or rather wouldn’t include each other in something.

When you had started your relationship Seongmin remembered you telling him you were a difficult partner. That often times it felt like your brain would grow legs and start running faster than you could keep up. That you would become physically and psychologically exhausted out of the blue. He thought it was silly how you would think your own personal struggles would deter him from wanting to be with you, but he quickly realized that even the brightest smile and silliest nudge in the right direction wouldn’t be enough to pull you out of a spiral once it started. It wasn’t impossible, not in the slightest, but Seongmin did really have to try. He had to try and be delicate with his words, careful with his actions, and very intentional about the way he would attempt to help you. He remembered you saying it wasn’t always about just trying to cheer you up but just noticing before things got too bad. Now he was noticing, and remembering the last time he saw you like this.

“Do you want to eat dinner… or like… take a break?” Seongmin asked. Gentle voice ringing throughout the room and eventually echoing through the nearly silent apartment. “You know you have to respond to me eventually.” He huffed stopping before he got frustrated.

All he got was a sort of muffled “sorry” from you in response as you kept clacking away at your computer.

He slowly unstuck his face from the doorframe “is typing more important than me?” approaching slowly and cracking a smile he reached his arms out to not only try and softly grab your shoulders but also to steady himself while sauntering over the sea of loose papers and piles of books strewn about the floor. “I was making a gentle suggestion before but now I’m serious! It’s time to take a break Y/N!” Seongmin rested his hands at either side of you just beside your neck and placed his thumbs right by your shoulder blades. He used his remaining fingers to lift up your chin and straighten out your posture a bit. “You haven’t looked me in the eyes in like two days.” Adjusting your chin more he leaned over to look at you flashing his signature puppy eyes, dark brown and sparkling as you returned his gaze.

You finally looked back at him letting him take in the bags under your eyes, visible even in the dim yellow glow reflected from your beat up desk lamp. “That’s a bit of an exaggeration isn’t it”. You said smiling dryly and stifling a yawn.

“Not really…” His reply had tinge of genuine sadness to it but he tried his best to hide it with another smile.

You spun around in your chair to face him better. “Sorry” you said again, this time a little clearer. “I just… have a lot of work to get done. Once I start it feels like I can’t stop.” You looked off into the distance, avoiding your partner’s eyes as you spoke. “I just feel like if I stop I’ll feel worse and I already have a lot of stuff to do so I just need to keep going, I just-” you furrowed your brows and narrowed your gaze as if trying to remember what it was that had originally glued you to this chair a couple days ago. “-I need to…” you trailed off.

“You need to take a break.” Seongmin said in all seriousness “right now”. He reached down to clasp your hands in his, and prevent you from turning around and working again.

That was enough to bring some clarity to you and remind you of what it felt like to be present again. You had spent so many hours tucked away in this room for seemingly no reason that Seongmin’s plain gaze and soft yet firm grip around your fingers helped to un-numb your senses. A wave of hunger, thirst, fatigue, and an ache in your upper body from sitting in the same position for so long hit you all at once. “Shit I feel awful…” you said to yourself “and kind of stupid, I don’t know why I do that.”

Seongmin leaned down and placed a little kiss on your nose. “You’re not stupid, just silly”. He chuckled waving a hand in front of your face “welcome to earth, it’s good to have you back!”

You smiled in embarrassment and bit your lip anxiously. “It hasn’t really been two days has it?”

Noticing the slight worry in your eyes and the way your fingers started to twitch in his hands, Seongmin decided to forgo the truth. “No! No! It’s only been like… I was exaggerating before it’s been like… Hey! Do you want to order food you must be really hungry!”

“I mean I thought…” your mind was a bit foggy but what he was saying didn’t seem right. Then the mention of ordering food settled into your mind and that did seem right. “Oh yeah, I’m totally starving!”

“Let me go get my phone.” Seongmin ruffled your hair a bit and then rushed out and before you could even blink, he was pulling you out of your chair and onto the bed to sit and browse his food delivery app. The dark circles were still ever-present under your eyes and you looked a bit haggard but as your face scanned his phone, no longer absorbed in work, a genuine smile on your face, light returning to your being he thought you looked really beautiful. Rubbing small circles on your back he reminded himself to remember this for next time, because no matter how awful it seemed there would always be a next time and that was okay…

-🍌🍶

19 notes · View notes

lavenderbang · 6 months

Text

Are We Just Friends?

Best Friend! Kim Taeyoung x reader

Genre(s): Best Friend to lovers, non-idol au, fluff I guess??? some angst because I couldn’t resist, Maybe slightly suggestive if you squint, and mentions of some of the other members of cravity

Warning(s): swearing, weed use, but that’s about it

Summary: Your best friend invites you to hang out late at night; that’s expected, since you usually hang out at night, but what you didn’t you didn’t expect was him to tell you something that has been on his mind recently

A/N: I AM IN LOVE WITH KIM TAEYOUNG. Okay but actually, I just really wanted to write this because I’m a self-indulgent fic writer and I want to hang out with Youngtae so badly bruh... So I’m writing this now. I hope you enjoy :)

HE IS SO PRETTY !!!!

Dumbass: I’m outside loser :p

You quickly slipped your old fleece jacket on before stepping out into the crisp cool night. It was late; later than you would usually hang out.

But with Taeyoung’s busy work schedule, you were just glad you were able to go see him. His junky grey car sat idling beside the curb; you could always hear it before you could see it, probably due to the shitty transmission or problems with the wheel bearings that Taeyoung didn’t have the money to fix.

He worked at your town’s local grocery store, mostly stocking shelves. He said it was only until he could find something better, but three years later he still spends almost everyday arranging boxes in the back and accounting for the shipments.

“Hey nerd, what’s the plan?” You said stepping into the car and closing the door behind you. He was wearing a simple black tee-shirt and a pair of baggy jeans. He also had the bracelet you gave him for his birthday wrapped around his wrist. It was a simple silver chain, but you had an almost identical one that you wore everyday.

“Wow, not even a ‘how are you’?” Taeyoung huffed, shaking his head playfully at you, “Straight to business I see...” You couldn’t help the smile the crept up onto you face as you rolled you eyes at him.

“Okay sorry,” You said sarcastically, going to buckle up your seat belt, “How are you?” “I’m good, thanks for asking.” Taeyoung said flatly, grinning softly at you before putting his hands on his steering wheel, “Is it okay if we go down to the river? Or is it too spooky for you this late?”

You lived in a small town out in the middle of nowhere; the population was low, mostly just families that had been there for generations and the occasional newcomer coming in for work. It was tucked up in the hills and surrounded by woods; It also bordered a river, which was a hot spot for people to visit in the summer to escape the blistering heat. Even though it wasn’t too hot now, it would still be nice to sit out there in the shroud of night and get a nice summer breeze off the edge of the water.

“That sounds fine dude,” You replied, tugging at the sleeves of your jacket, “But it wouldn’t be this late if you would have invited me out sooner.”

“Sorry, some of us have a job.” Taeyoung scoffed, putting his car in drive and pulling away from your house. Without looking away from the road, he tosses his phone into your lap, “You have to DJ because I have to make sure we don’t hit anything.”

“roger that.” You hummed, scrolling through Taeyoung’s Spotify to press shuffle on a playlist titled ‘The Jams’. The song didn’t really matter, since it was just background noise anyways.

“How was work today? You were there pretty late tonight huh?” You asked only for Taeyoung to groan dramatically.

“For some reason, Serim’s dad ordered a double shipment of a bunch of our items, so I had spent ages counting them out,” Taeyoung huffed, stopping at a red light and turning to you, “Why did he do that to me?! When Serim hooked me up with this shitty job at his dad’s grocery store, I thought it was supposed to be fun!”

Taeyoung started waving his hands around as he ranted. You couldn’t help but grin; it was a habit he had that you noticed almost immediately after becoming friends. You think it must just be from him getting too worked up over stuff, because you also noticed he did it when he was excited as well.

“I thought I was supposed to be chill because Mr. Park has always been super chill when we go to their house to hang.” Taeyoung continued, “But nooo! When I work for him, he orders a double shipment out of the blue or asks me to count everything again ‘just to be sure’. I swear he purposely makes me stay longer at work.”

“Youngtae,” You hummed, pointing out the front window at the traffic lights, “Green.” Taeyoung let out a sigh before pressing on the gas.

“If you hate it so much, why do you stay working there?” You asked, rolling down the window to let the cool night air in. Taeyoung approaches the edge of town, turning down the dirt road that would lead you both to the river bank.

“I heard the gas station Minhee work at is looking for someone. You could ask him to help you out.” You suggested, earning a “mmh-hmm” in response from Taeyoung.

“Maybe, but I’m pretty sure the owner hates me for shoplifting candies when we were in middle school.” He said sheepishly, cringing at the memory and pulling off the road; he drove through the long grass to the edge of the river before putting his car in park.

“Besides, I don’t want to be in this hellhole for much longer.” Taeyoung confessed, turning his car off and taking his seat belt off.

“No?” You replied, taking your seat belt off too, opting to lean the seat back a bit more before continuing in a teasing tone, “This place doesn’t tickle your fancy?”

“Not at all,” Taeyoung chuckled, pushing his dark hair out of his face, “You guys made being here manageable, but I can’t stand being here. I feel like I’m going to be stuck.”

“I get that,” You said, staring at your hands in your lap, “We all feel the same, I think...”

“Do you have your pen on you?” Taeyoung suddenly asked. You silently pulled it out of your pocket and handed it to him. He takes a hit of it before frowning.

“What flavour of cart is this? It tastes like ass.” Taeyoung complained, handing the dab pen back to you. You take a hit of it too, humming as you let the smoke fill your lungs.

“Its blackberry I think..?” You replied, bringing the pen up to your eyes to look at it. You shrug, taking another hit of it, “I wanted to try something new. Besides, it’ s not that bad.”

Taeyoung took it from your grasp before placing it between his lips. His eyebrows furrowed as he inhaled with a disgusted look on his face.

“Remind me to never buy blackberry.” He grumbled, giving it back to you as you giggled at him. The two of you sat in silence for a moment. You glanced at Taeyoung’s side profile, as he was seemingly staring out into nothingness.

“Did you hear Seongmin got into university?” Taeyoung broke the silence, and you nodded. He tapped his fingers on the steering wheel while thinking, before leaning back, “I’m happy for him. He moves into the city sometime at the end of august. He asked me and a few of the guys if we’ll drive him in and help him move stuff into the dorm.”

“That’s really wonderful for him,” You said genuinely, eyes drifting away from Taeyoung to look out to where he was staring at. You could see the reflection of the water from the light of the moon, as it was pretty clear that night. You turned back to Taeyoung, trying to read his expression, “don’t you think its wonderful?”

“Yeah, of course.” Taeyoung said, smiling at you weakly before taking a deep breath, “Its just... I’ll miss him, y’know? I think it’s one of the big reason I haven’t left yet. I’d miss you guys too much...”

“Yeah, I understand what you mean.” You said, looking out your open window, “But I think it’ll be okay.”

Taeyoung looked at you, but you were leaned away from him against the window, closing your eyes just to bask in the night atmosphere. He could barely see you in this light, but your figure looked calm and relaxed in the light of the moon.

“You’re not worried about drifting apart?” Taeyoung asked, anxiety laced through his tone as he fidgeted in his seat. You glanced at him before sitting up in your seat.

“Not at all.” You said simply, smiling softly and brushing your hand through your hair, “I think if we all put in a effort to talk or text regularly, no distance could force our little group apart.”

You turn to face Taeyoung, who chewed his bottom lip nervously. His eyes shone like diamonds from the reflection of the sky, and you couldn’t help the grin that came across your face.

“It’s all about doing your part to nurture the relationship, y’know?” You concluded, taking your pen out and having one last hit of it before throwing it haphazardly in the cup holder.

“I guess you’re right... I’m just scared because it’ll be really different.” Taeyoung hummed. He picked at his nails, peeling the polish you did a week ago off them.

“Different doesn’t mean bad,” You replied, before smiling playfully and grabbing his hand to stop him from picking off the nail polish, “Hey, don’t pick off all my hard work!” Taeyoung chuckled at you, looking down at his fingernails and then back at you.

“Sorry.” He said and laced his fingers in between yours, “You’re right. everything will be okay. Besides, we will all move at some point, right?” You hummed in agreement, turning to look out the window again at the river.

Taeyoung’s hand was warm in yours; he felt clammy from the summer humidity, but it fit almost perfectly in yours. Like it was meant to belong there...

You sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments, nothing heard but the sound of crickets in the reeds by the river and the quiet melody of the song playing on Taeyoung’s phone.

That’s how it was with Taeyoung, comfortable.

You and him had always been close, you’d even go as far as saying he was your best friend in your little group of friends. But more recently, you’d been feeling a bit awkward around Taeyoung after an incident that happened that planted this annoying thought in the back of your head...

Jungmo had a party about a month ago at his house; His parents were out of town that weekend, so of course all of your friends were invited, plus a few other people you graduated with. Well, of course that lead to a bunch more people showing up (people you didn’t really know), but nobody really minded at the end of the day, since the more the merrier for it.

You, Taeyoung and a few of your other friends were sitting out in the backyard, overall having a good time. There were a few other people around, but you didn’t really notice to much; you were absolutely high at the time, as was Taeyoung and the boys from your friend group which were sitting with you.

“No you’re not listening to me (Y/N)!” Woobin shouted, taking slow, long blinks while putting his hands up in defense, “You would need to go to the boat, Like they do in the movie.”

“no no! I’d just swim around until the flood ended,” You argued, crossing your arms, “Besides, they didn’t even get to the boat in the movie, they just stood up on a rock and the water went away.”

“But the water only went away because of that dumbass squirrel and it’s acorn!” Woobin said with a huff, “Besides, you’ll get tired after swimming for a while. The only way to survive is getting on the boat.”

“What are you two arguing over? I can hear you yelling from inside...” Allen said with a drunken giggle, closing the patio door behind him as he sat down and cracked open the can of beer in his hand.

“How we would survive if we were in Ice Age, The Meltdown.” Taeyoung explained, grinning as he tossed his dab pen to Allen, “Ruby insists you’d die without getting to the boat and (Y/N) thinks they could just swim around until the water went away.”

“You’re both wrong and stupid,” Wonjin said playfully, wagging his finger around the circle before tapping on his head, “I’d just climb up onto the ice wall honestly.” You all let out exclamations in protest, talking about the water coming from the ice wall and Allen let out a hearty laugh at your antics.

“Youngtae,” You huffed in a whiny voice, leaning your head on his shoulder and sticking your lip out in a pout, “You think I could swim to survive, right?”

“If we are going based on the events of the movie,” Taeyoung hummed, tapping his chin clumsily while pretending to think, “I think you could swim for long enough to survive.”

“Ha!” You shouted, sticking your finger in Woobin’s face with a satisfied smile, “See? Youngtae agrees with me, which means I win!” You giggled happily and leaned more into Taeyoung, who slung his arm around your shoulder lazily.

“Whatever, I’m not listening to dumb and dumber.” Woobin said while rolling his eyes. You and Taeyoung immediately began bicker on who was dumb and who was dumber.

“I’m going in to get something to eat, anyone wanna come or need me to bring anything?” Woobin stood from his spot on the lawn and stretching his arms up over his head. Wonjin murmured something about chips while laying on his back and counting the blades of grass near his face. Allen shook his head no, before taking a sip of the drink he had in his hand.

“I wanna come! I have to pee anyways.” Taeyoung cheered, lifting you off of him to stand up. You grabbed onto Taeyoung’s arm and asked for a drink of water, to which Taeyoung acknowledged with a ‘roger that!’; then the two boys went inside, closing the patio door behind them leaving you with Wonjin and Allen and the few strangers from before. It was a girl you didn’t recognize accompanied by a guy you went to high school with, but didn’t really talk to, since he was a few grades above you.

“Hey guys, I think I took too much weed.” Wonjin said with a sigh, flicking the grass lazily, “My eyes feel like they are made of liquid and my body feels like it weighs a million pounds.”

“My mouth is just super dry...” You said, smacking your lips and touching your tongue with your index finger, “My thongue theels like thandpaper”

“You guys should have just had alcohol instead then,” Allen boasted, grabbing your arm to take your finger out of your mouth. He let out a little giggle, rubbing the back of his neck bashfully, “I mean, I had waaaaaayyy too much so I’m not any better off.”

“You probably came outside to make sure you didn’t puke on Jungmo’s carpet...” You hummed, earning a ‘bingo’ from Allen, who chuckled along with you before taking another swig from his beer and then setting the can down in the grass.

“You’ll be fine, Taeyoung is bringing you water for your precious tongue.” Wonjin said and sat up, pulling his phone out and turning it on only to put it back in his pocket. He then smiles gently to himself and snickering, “And Ruby is bringing me chips so I’ll be fine too, hehe....”

“You guys didn’t need anything, right?” Allen asked the strangers sitting off to the side. You turned to look at them and giving them both a polite smile, which they reciprocated.

“No we’re good.” The dude said simply, turning to the girl beside him and kissing her cheek with a grin. She leaned further into him as he pulled her closer, “Right baby?”

“Yeah, we are good.” She smiled at him before looking at you sweetly, “So, how long have you been dating?”

“....Huh?” You asked, furrowing your eyebrows at her, “Dating who?”

Just then, The patio door opened to reveal Woobin with a bag of tortilla chips and Taeyoung with two glasses of water in his hand.

“We have come bearing gifts!” Woobin cheered, throwing the bag of chips down onto the grass only for it to be snatched up quickly by Wonjin. Taeyoung gave you the glass gingerly, before sitting back down beside you with his own glass.

“What happened while we were gone?” Taeyoung asked, looking around at all the members in the little group.

“I was just asking your partner how long you two had been dating for?” The girl said, nodding her head towards you. You felt your eyes widen and your face heat up, as you quickly stared down at the grass. The girl turned to the boy beside her and placed a quick kiss on his lips, “Me and Christopher have been together for only a few months now, but it feel like its been forever. I was just wondering how long have you been dating for?”

“Me and (Y/N).... Uhhh...” Taeyoung mumbled, clearly taken aback by this girl’s question. He scooted a bit away from you, brushing his hair out of his face. The other boys looked between the two of you awkwardly, as you kept your eyes trained in your lap and the grass below.

“We aren’t a couple actually.... Just good friends, that’s all.” Taeyoung replied, embarrassment clear by the tone of his voice and the redness rising from his neck up to his ears. The girl had gone pale, letting out a quiet ‘oh’ before silence fell over the group.

“I’m sorry I assumed.” She apologized quickly, “You guys are just so touchy with each other and I saw the matching bracelets so I assumed. I’m really sorry.”

“It’s fine, you didn’t know.” Taeyoung laughed awkwardly, picking at his fingernails and looking anywhere but you beside him. You couldn’t bring yourself to look up at all. You felt your stomach sink and a horrible feeling of nausea washed over you as you tapped the edge of your water glass.

It went silent again, and you felt like everyone was holding their breath. You hated it. Were you and Taeyoung too clingy? Did people really think you guys were dating. There is no way you’d ever date Taeyoung, he’s your best friend! Why did you feel like your stomach was doing back flips and your face was on fire? You hated this whole situation; it was all too much for you right now.

You lazily checked your phone, pretending to look at the time before you downed your glass of water. You stood up, earning the attention of the rest of the group.

“Its pretty late and I had too much weed, so I’m going to go to bed.” You said with a weak smile, nodding to the couple of strangers, “Nice to meet you both.”

“Are you sure, (Y/N)?” Allen asked, standing up too. He gave you a subtle look of pity as you nodded, plastering a fake smile on your face. You felt like you were hyperventilating with all the eyes on you. It was all to much for you in this state.

“Good night boys.” You mumbled before retreating back inside, not sparing a glance at Taeyoung. Why did this situation make you so anxious. And why did this make you question your relationship with Taeyoung? Was your relationship perceived as more then friends by most people? Aren’t friends clingy anyways, or was it to a different degree you and Taeyoung? But most importantly, why did the idea of dating him not sound so bad to you when you really thought about it? You were going to be sick if you thought about it longer.

It was too much, so you pushed those thoughts as you retreated to Jungmo’s spare room and lock the door behind you, not to come out until the next morning, where nobody brought it up, not even Taeyoung.

Even when you hung out with him a week later, and then last week too, Taeyoung didn’t mention the incident at all, but you both knew it caused a change in the comfortability of your relationship...

It felt strange to hold Taeyoung’s hand after the incident. You weren’t sure what happened after you went to bed, but you were feeling a sense a relief that he did hold your hand when he needed it. It was a sign that maybe your relationship could be going back to normal maybe? Taeyoung brushed his thumb subconsciously over the back of your hand. Now buried in the relief arose a strange feeling, the one where your stomach was doing flips and your started to feel a bit warmer and that little thought of dating him crawled its way out of the back of your brain.

“Your hand is super sweaty dude.” Taeyoung laughed, giving it a little squeeze. You let out a laugh too, releasing his hand and wiping yours on your pant leg.

“Sorry, I guess I’m a little hot right now.” You confessed, “I shouldn’t have worn this shitty jacket...”

“I love that jacket, even though it’s so old and shitty,” Taeyoung said playfully, leaning over to grab near the pocket and smiling when he felt the crispy outline of a burn hole, “I remember when we all went camping last summer and you got hit by a stray spark from the campfire and it burned this hole in it. I remember you standing up so fast and me and you patting it out before it could burn you.” He chuckled at the memory, looking up at your face as you felt around the burn hole too.

“That was fun, minus me almost getting lit on fire.” You said grinning at the fond memory before looking at Taeyoung in the eyes, “We should go camping again sometime. Although, preferably when it’s not so hot outside.”

“If you’re really that hot, we could go for a swim in the river?” Taeyoung suggested nonchalantly, the corners of his mouth curling up into a cat-like grin.

“I’d love to, but do I look like I’m wearing a swimsuit stupid?” You chuckled, gesturing to your body before laughing a bit at the idea.

“Not a problem!” Taeyoung hummed, before surprising you by suddenly tugging his shirt up and over his head. Your eyes went from his bare torso back up to his face with a look of shock.

“It’s nothing you haven’t seen before because being in your underwear is basically the same thing as being in a swimsuit,” Taeyoung deduced, opening his car door and starting to undo his belt. His torso seemed to glow in the moonlight from the sheen sweat from the summer heat; he must have been just as hot as you were, but somehow you started to feel it even worse now that Taeyoung was more exposed. You couldn’t take your eyes off him and you felt your heart squeeze a bit, which was increasingly concerning.

“You coming or..?” Taeyoung asked with a smile, leaning down to make eye contact with you. His hands dipped into the top of his jeans, however he did not pull them down yet. You realized he was waiting for you to agree before doing so, which made you feel much more comfortable.

You thought for a moment. You knew this wasn’t a good idea, as the little voice in your head that arose form the party was getting stronger and you could feel the rational part of your head be clouded over by not only your other thoughts, but also the haze of your weed kicking in. You chewed you lip nervously before smiling softly back at Taeyoung.

“Fine Youngtae. Fuck it. It’s too hot” You sighed, taking your jacket off before stepping out of the car too. You piled all your clothing (besides your undergarments) haphazardly on the passenger seat and placed your shoes on the car floor in front of the seat. Now that you were out of the car in nothing but your underwear, you felt the coolness of the night air. However, you still felt just as hot, if not worse. You couldn’t shake the nervous feeling in the pit of your stomach or the beating of your heart the felt like it was going a million miles an hour from adrenaline.

Your nervousness must have showed, because you could hear a hearty laugh come from your best friend as he walked around to the front of the car.

“Relax a bit dude, it’s just me here.” He said, brushing his hair back once more. You refused to look anywhere south of his belly button, for your own sanity, but you did notice his boxers being a ugly plaid pattern from your peripheral.

“If I would have known you’d be seeing my underwear, I’d have worn nicer ones...” You said, trying to sound as casual as possible, but inside your body was on fire. Your brain was shutting down and your body felt jittery and nervous.

“Don’t worry about that, you look fine.” Taeyoung complimented, making your stomach drop. Taeyoung walked past you, going down to the very edge and walking along it, calling after you. “Come on, slow poke! The shallow area should be around here..”

You shook your head, trying to get a hold of yourself; taking a deep breath and following Taeyoung to the shallow part where people usually swam during the day. He stepped off the bank and into the water, having it come up to his ankles when he let out a few curses and curled his fingers into fists at his side.

“Brrrr! Its freezing!” He cried out, wincing at you as you laughed at how cute he was, “I’m going to become a Young-sicle after this I’m sure...”

“I guess I’ll be a (Y/N)-sicle then,” You said, stepping in beside him and feeling a shiver immediately run up your legs from the cold water. Your eyes meet Taeyoung and you both burst out in laughter at the knowing look of biting cold that you both are experiencing.

Taeyoung begins to wade out a bit further, complaining the whole time when you get an evil idea. You follow him, water getting up to around your knees with your grin growing as you close the distance between the two of you, so that you are are now standing maybe a couple feet away from each other again.

“Hey Youngtae!” You called to him to get his attention. He turned to look at you and before he had time to react, you dig your hands into the ice cold water and splash him. He shrieked due to the surprise of water hitting his body and the cool temperature of it of his skin. You laughed at his reaction, quickly doing a few more splashes so he doesn’t have time to recover, getting water all the way up to near his face.

“Quit it! It’s freezing!” He places his hands out to try and block the water from hitting him. Your laughter quickly goes from joyous to scared as he starts wading over to you.

“No wait! I’m sorry!” You said through a fit of giggles, weakly splashing at him to try and keep him away, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry. Youngtae, don’t!”

“You should have thought about that before you splashed me, stupid.” He giggled back, grabbing onto your arm and pulling you towards him so he can wrap his arms around your frame. You let out a squeal as he lifted you a bit, dragging you into deeper water.

“Youngtae, please don’t! I’m sorry.” You struggled against his iron grip, smacking his arms playfully, but you felt the chuckle leaving his chest as he held you still in the water.

“Sorry,” He hummed sarcastically, “Next time don’t start something you can’t finish.”

With that, Taeyoung quickly lifted you off your feet and promptly dunked you in the water, almost crushing you by laying down over you, just to make sure you couldn’t avoid the icy plunge. You screamed from the cold, while Taeyoung sucked air through his teeth at the freezing water rushing over his back. He let you go and you quickly spun around to face him before smacking him on the shoulder.

“Kim Taeyoung I swear, you’re dead meat!” You scolded while giggling at him. His expression mirrored your own, with only a slight hint of pride residing in his features.

“Hey! You were the one who splashed me first!” Taeyoung laughed, leaning back to sit in the shallow water; he crossed his legs, letting the water comfortably wade just under his collar bones. You mumbled in agreement, letting your laughter die down before you sat beside him.

The cool water was frigid at first, but after a few seconds of getting used to it, it felt refreshing. You let out a sigh of relief, feeling the heat from earlier subside even a little bit as you closed your eyes. You and Taeyoung were silent, just listening to the sound of the running water and the faint tune of Taeyoung’s car radio fill the air.

That is, until you best friend broke the silence.

“Hey, uhm.” He mumbled, causing you to open your eyes and look at him; you almost wished you didn’t. He looked beautiful, hair slightly damp, tan skin shining, soft eyes trained on you with his bottom lip slightly tucked between his teeth.

“I’ve been meaning to talk to you about something.” Taeyoung continued, scooting closer to you, causing the water around the two of you to ripple; much like the butterflies that arrive in your stomach from the possibilities of this conversation.

“What is it?”

“Well, I..... uhm.”

“Youngtae.” You said flatly, expression softening as you reached out for his arm to place a comforting touch to it, “talk to me.”

You could tell Taeyoung was anxious from the way his eyebrows furrowed and how his lips were pulled into a thin line. He had the same look before the talent show in middle school; It was the first time he performed in front of anyone and he was so nervous he almost threw up. But, just like now, you were there for him to make sure he was okay.

Like you’d always be.

He let out a sigh, before looking away from you, “I wanted to talk about what happened.. Y’know... at the party.”

It was your turn to be anxious now, body freezing up before you turned to look away too, focusing on the way the moon reflected off the dark water. Was this it? Did Taeyoung not want to be your friend anymore because of how you acted at the party? Did he think you were disgusted with the possibility of dating him? Would he be weirded out if he found out you felt quite the opposite?

“Look, I’m sorry.” He started out, struggling to find the words, “I know you were really uncomfortable and I.... I should have been more aware of how my behavior can be perceived by others. I know that we are just friends and I shouldn’t be so clingy...”

“Please don’t apologize! You didn’t do anything wrong.” You quickly countered, looking down at the way your body distorted through the water. You wanted nothing more than to drown yourself there.

You were the one who froze up and didn’t say a word. You were the one who left him alone to deal with the situation. You were the one who was slowly growing relationship-changing feelings... “It should be me who is apologizing.”

“For what?!” Taeyoung gasped, whipping his head to look at you.

“For making you think that I was upset with you! For leaving and making it awkward between us.”

“You weren’t upset?”

“No.” You huffed out, feeling your face heat up. You take your cold hands out of the water to pat your cheeks gently as you let out a sigh. Your mind felt cloudy and your heart beat went steady against your chest. You blamed the weed for allowing the truth to tumble out of your mouth, “I should apologize because I’m still making it awkward between us...”

“How so?” He mumbled, eyes burning holes into the side of your face as you looked out at the other shoreline. You heaved a heavy sigh, hanging you head before letting all the true thoughts and feelings you’ve been having spill out.

“Because I can’t stop thinking about how much I love you.” You confessed, words flowing from your lips much easier than you anticipated, “Not in a platonic, ‘we are best friends!’ way, but in a ‘I think about you all the time and want to wake up next to you everyday’ kind of way. I didn’t realize it until the party, but I am in love with you and I maybe always have been.”

The silence was deafening, with the only sound being the thumping of a nervous heart and the rushing of the cold water surrounding you. You drop you head, feeling the weight of what you just said.

Taeyoung was quiet beside you, seemingly from shock or being deep in thought.

You allowed the silence only for a moment before you turned to look at him. You couldn’t bear the uneasiness any longer.

“I’m so sorry.” You mumbled, your gaze catching his, “I know we are just frien-”

Taeyoung quickly cut you off by rushing forward, placing a hasty kiss on you lips. It was so quick, you weren’t even sure if it happened as you just stared at him, too stunned to speak.

He...

He kissed you?

“I’m sorry, I should have asked before I did that!” Taeyoung huffed out, running one of his wet hands through his hair as he smiled, mouth slightly agape. You noticed the redness creeping up his neck and cheeks.

“I... I’m just.” He stutters, brain seemingly short-circuited before he cleared his throat and took a deep breath to collect himself, “I just never thought you’d like me back.” “You... like me?” You asked, heart leaping into your throat.

“Well duh!” He giggled, “I mean, I thought I was pretty obvious about my feelings for you, but I just assumed you never saw me as anything more than a friend. And I’m more than happy to just be a part of your life.”

“Wow, I must’ve be blind...”

“No, just stupid.”

“Okay, that’s a bit uncalled for.”

“Sorry.” Taeyoung hummed, shifting to tuck his knees up against his chest as he wrapped his arms around them. He chewed his bottom lip nervously as his eyes darted down to the dark murky water, “So..?”

“So?”

“Now what?”

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know!” Taeyoung huffed exasperated , throwing his hands in the air, causing the water around the two of you to ripple. “Are we still just friends or....” He let his voice trail on, giving you a hopeful look, “Does this change everything?”

“I mean,” You spoke softly, feeling the heat rise to your face. Why was it all of a sudden so hard to talk to Taeyoung? You felt like you were choking on the words as you cleared your throat and meekly whispered, “I wouldn’t mind a change...”

Taeyoung nodded, smile slowly spreading across his face as he registered what you said. He turned to you, scooting a bit closer so that your shoulders touched and your faces were a few inches apart.

“I think I’d like that too.” He whispered, voice just barely audible as his eyes wandered your facial features. Without another word more, you slowly leaned in, giving him plenty of time to move away before you placed you lips against his.

You were felling so many things at this moment; joy, excitement, nervousness. But above all else, you felt right.

Being here with Taeyoung, kissing him and letting yourself love him just felt right. Like it was all falling into place and meant to be. You thought about your future with your best friend and how that was all going to change; but you had hope that it would be for the better.

—————————

A/N: In my Taeyoung vibes and I just didn’t have a way to finish it so please forgive a rushed ending. I love this man SOOO much !! Believe it or not, he’s actually my main man in Cravity, even though I haven’t posted about him lol. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed!!!

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seowoobins · 1 year

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230308 : twt update

#not his caption being a whole lil au fjdjdjd #he's so silly 💓#woobin #seo woobin #ruby #cravity #twt update #230308

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deedeekpop · 6 months

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Cravity

Serim

Nothing yet...

Allen

Nothing yet...

Jungmo

Nothing yet...

Woobin

Nothing yet...

Wonjin

Nothing yet...

Minhee

Nothing yet...

Hyeongjun

Nothing yet...

Taeyoung

Nothing yet...

Seongmin

Nothing yet...

Series

Nothing yet...

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leeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesworld · 2 months

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CALM AFTER THE STORM |BTS OT7 X READER| HYBRID AU (M)

{Chapter One – Disgusting Humans}

Pairing: OT7 BTS!HYBRID X FEM!HUMAN READER.

Kim Namjoon: Black Mackenzie Valley Alpha wolf

Kim Soekjin: Alpha White Lion

Min Yoongi: Alpha White Jaguar

Jung Hosoek: Alpha Snow Leopard

Park Jimin: Alpha Albino Cobra

Kim Taehyung: Alpha White/ Bleached Tiger

Jeon Jungkook: Alpha Black Panther

Reader: Heaven Valentino

Status: Ongoing

RATED (M) FOR MATURE

Words: 2.4k!

WARNING: EVENTUAL SMUT, BLOOD GORE, DETAILED GRAPHIC DESCRIPTION, ABUSE (ALL FORMS), PROFANITY, VIOLENCE, MENTIONS OF SUICIDE, CHARACTER DEATH(MINOR), SADOMASOCHISM ACTS, MENTIONS OF BDSM, ETC...

CHAPTER WARNING: The following chapter contains sensitive and distressing subject matter, including references to child rape, kidnapping, and child trafficking. If you find such topics triggering or uncomfortable, I encourage you to exercise self-care and consider avoiding this particular chapter. Your mental and emotional well-being always come first.

Previous Next

MATERIALIST

~Valentino Mansion~

3RD PERSON'S POV

Heaven Valentino, a skilled and determined woman, had just finished a rigorous training session at her gym. With precision and composure, she fired round after round at a target dummy, hitting the bullseye every time. Satisfied with her performance, she exited the gym and began making her way back to her room.

As she walked, a voice called out to her,

"Ms. Valentino?" It was her secretary and trusted right-hand man, Park Hyung-jae, hurrying to catch up with her.

Curious, she turned to face him. "Yes, Jae?"

"Someone is requesting your presence," Jae informed her, the urgency evident in his voice.

Heaven's sharp mind instantly assessed the situation.

"Who is it, and what role do they play?" she calmly inquired.

Jae answered without missing a beat.

"Choi Woobin, Chief Executive General Officer," he replied, conveying that the person in question held a position of significance.

"Very well," she replied nonchalantly.

"Set up an appointment for two in the afternoon. If he fails to arrive on time, I will not entertain him. Punctuality is of utmost importance to me."

With that, she moved on, resolute in her decision. It was typical of her to make swift judgments and take charge of her own schedule, refusing to waste time on those who did not value timeliness.

Her composed demeanor left Jae slightly taken aback.

"Well, that was easier than I expected," he mused to himself, shrugging off the surprise. With a sense of relief, he left to fulfill his assigned tasks.

~Heaven's Room~

Heaven's POV

Ah, I knew it wouldn't take long for him to come begging. I could see right through his façade, right from the start. You see, there are very few things that I despise more than tardiness, laziness and liars.

Hybrid abusers.

Growing up as the youngest daughter of the illustrious Valentino family, I've had my fair share of enemies. From the moment I entered this world, there were those who sought to bring me down, to harm me, or even to kidnap me, all in an attempt to weaken my family. But these feeble-minded individuals could never succeed.

Many assumed that, as a wealthy and privileged young woman, I would be nothing more than a spoiled brat with no ability to defend herself.

But oh, how wrong they were.

From the day I could walk and comprehend the world around me, I have been trained relentlessly.

The Valentinos believe in honing the skills and fortitude of their children, regardless of their gender. So, from the tender age of four, I began my journey towards becoming a force to be reckoned with.

By the time I reached fifteen, I had accomplished what most could only dream of. I graduated high school with a flawless 5.0 GPA. But my thirst for knowledge was insatiable, leading me to a prestigious university known as the "Gifted Souls."

In just a few short years, I secured a PhD in psychology, a Masters in business, and even delved into the realm of fashion. I achieved all of this by the tender age of twenty-two, and now, at the age of twenty-three, I am well on my way to solidifying my empire and making a name for myself.

The professors at my university were astounded by my brilliance, bestowing upon me the moniker of the 'female version of Albert Einstein.' But, I paid little attention to such trivialities.

My single-minded focus was on gaining knowledge and establishing myself as a force in the business world. I aim to take over one of my parents' companies, the very essence of the Valentino empire.

People may see me as a woman who walks with an iron fist. When they encounter me, they don't think of mesad merely as Heaven of the Valentino family, they see Heaven Valentino, a woman who commands respect and exudes power.

Some have even had the audacity to refer to me as the ice princess, the demoness and a sadist. But I take such labels in stride because I know the true strength that lies within me.

As an individual who values efficiency and productivity, I possess a limited tolerance for trivial matters or individuals who impede progress.

In the circle with which I surround myself, idleness and unproductive behavior have no place.

Vigilance remains paramount, as there are perpetually individuals plotting one's downfall or even one's demise, and I personally acknowledge the latter as the ultimate threat.

Over time, I have accumulated a considerable list of adversaries. The number of instances where I have inadvertently provoked others is too extensive to accurately quantify, such is the nature of my assertive personality.

When confronted with something disagreeable or incongruous to my stated preferences, I swiftly take decisive action.

The ability to discern and rectify undesirable situations is a responsibility I take seriously, akin to the saying,

"With great power comes great responsibility."

In my case, this responsibility is focused solely on my survival.

While some may perceive my approach as cold or detached, it is merely a matter of survival in a world where dangers often lurk beneath the surface.

In conclusion, my aversion to nonsense and unwavering commitment to productivity have inevitably resulted in the development of numerous adversaries.

This is an outcome I readily accept due to the assertive nature of my character.

My consistent and immediate response to unfavorable circumstances is driven by a sense of responsibility towards self-preservation.

Ultimately, it is this unwavering dedication to my own well-being that helps me navigate the precarious landscape of existence.

I felt my eyes narrow as I thought about the man who had recently come into my crosshairs,

Mr. Choi, the Chief Executive General Officer of Seoul National Police.

To the public, he was a respected figure in his early fifties, but I knew the dark secrets that lurked beneath his facade.

Mr. Choi's wife had tragically succumbed to stage four cancer, leaving him without any children to carry on his legacy.

Many saw him as a pillar of the community, a dedicated servant of the people. But I saw through the facade to the truth - he was a twisted, solipsistic man who had been engaged in despicable acts.

It was a revelation that had shaken me to the core when I had discovered that Mr. Choi was involved in taking bribes from hybrid traffickers.

The thought of such corruption within the ranks of law enforcement made my blood boil.

But what truly turned my stomach was the knowledge that he was also a child rapist and a sadistic individual who derived pleasure from the suffering of others.

Only I and my uncle knew the extent of Mr. Choi's depravity. My uncle ran a Hybrid facility called Hybrid Heaven (HH), dedicated to rescuing hybrids from abuse and capturing traffickers who sought to exploit them for profit.

When my uncle had uncovered Mr. Choi's involvement in these heinous activities, he had turned to me for help in bringing him to justice.

With the help of my loyal team of associates, I had quickly gathered evidence of Mr. Choi's crimes. It was not difficult to connect the dots once they realized that a police officer was complicit in covering up the illegal activities of hybrid trafficking.

And when Mr. Choi's name had surfaced as the linchpin in the operation, I wasted no time in setting my plan into motion.

I stood in my room and felt a surge of anger and revulsion towards the man who had committed such atrocities. I knew that he was reaching out in a desperate attempt to cover his tracks, but I also knew that I held the power to bring him to his knees.

With a steely resolve, I prepared myself for the confrontation that lay ahead. I would not rest until Mr. Choi faced the full force of justice for his crimes.

And in that moment, I squared my shoulders and steeled my gaze, I knew that I was ready to confront the darkness that lurked within the heart of a man who had once been seen as a paragon of virtue.

°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°•°•°•°•°•°•°

~Mayás Fashion House~

As I arrived at my company building, the energy in the air shifted as the employees stopped in their tracks to greet me politely. With a nod and a smile, I returned their greetings, keeping the interactions brief.

I made my way to the private elevator that would take me up to the 8th floor where the meeting room awaited.

As the elevator came to a stop, I stepped out and approached the meeting room. The transparent glass walls and doors allowed me to catch a glimpse of Mr. Choi inside, his figure pacing nervously.

I watched as he reached for a handkerchief to dab at his sweat, a reaction that I found somewhat distasteful. Pushing open the doors, I sauntered over to one of the swivel chairs, disrupting Mr. Choi's anxious movements.

"Good Afternoon, Mr. Choi," I greeted him calmly, causing him to visibly startle. With hesitant steps, he made his way towards me and took a seat on the opposite side of the table.

"G-good af-afternoon, Ms. Valentino," he stuttered out, clearly flustered by my presence.

"Relax, Mr. Choi. I just need some information from you, and then we'll be done," I reassured him with a light chuckle, meeting his gaze as he averted his eyes and nodded eagerly.

"Good. Now, let's not beat around the bush. Tell me everything you know about the illegal underground Hybrid dealers," I said, leaning back in my chair, a sense of authority evident in my tone.

Mr. Choi hesitated before beginning to speak, revealing details about the underground operation.

He mentioned a mysterious figure known as Black Eagle who orchestrated the kidnapping and sale of hybrids for profit.

The auction took place over five days at a luxurious resort on the outskirts of Seoul, shrouded in secrecy to all but those in attendance.

His eyes met mine as he shared more about the nefarious activities, including a bi-monthly Hybrid auction where rare exotic hybrids were sold off to wealthy clientele with exclusive VIP passes provided by Black Eagle.

I listened intently, absorbing the information and maintaining a composed demeanor throughout.

It was clear that Mr. Choi was apprehensive, but my focused interrogation drew out the pertinent details I needed to pursue further action against the criminal syndicate.

My eyebrows creased as I listened, a mix of disbelief and horror washing over me.

The thought of such a place existing where people indulged in their darkest desires on hybrids, pushing the boundaries of cruelty and exploitation, made my stomach churn with disgust. The depths of depravity that some individuals would sink to astounded me.

He continued, "Participants torture hybrids to feed into their twisted sexual gratification,"

What the actual fuck!

These creatures, who were part human and part animal, deserved compassion and care, not to be subjected to such heinous acts.

It was a stark reminder of the darkest facets of humanity, a side that I never wanted to believe existed.

As the details of the auction event unfolded, each revelation seemed to plunge me deeper into a pit of revulsion.

"They also indulged in the "hunger games" a concept, where the rarest hybrids were paraded and objectified for the amusement of the audience, they would compete to inflict pain and suffering on the hybrid, all for the chance to possess them as prizes."

It felt like a nightmare brought to life. To think of it was sickening beyond words.

My heart ached for the hybrids subjected to such cruelty, for their pain and helplessness in the face of such brutality.

It was a stark reminder of the darker side of society, one that I had never truly comprehended until now.

The callousness and inhumanity displayed towards these creatures left me feeling a deep sense of shame for belonging to the same species.

Despite the turmoil of emotions swirling within me, I forced myself to remain composed, to listen to the grim details of the auction event with a steely resolve.

The urge to lash out in anger and despair clawed at the edges of my composure, but I held onto my restraint, determined to bear witness to the extent of the atrocities being described.

As the final details of the event were laid bare, the mechanics of the auction and the fate of the hybrids outlined in chilling clarity, a cold fury settled over me.

The thought of the buyers participating in such cruelty, of treating living beings as mere objects to be traded and discarded, filled me with a sense of loathing that I had never experienced before.

With a clenched jaw and a heart heavy with sorrow, I steeled myself to hear more, to confront the depths of depravity that lay at the heart of the five-day auction event.

Despite the revulsion and horror that threatened to overwhelm me, I knew that I had to bear witness to the truth, no matter how harrowing it may be.

I made a solemn vow to ensure their safety and vowed to lead them to a life free from such atrocities.

Determination consumed me, and I pledged to keep my promise, declaring my identity as Heaven Valentino.

In the intense confrontation that followed, I confronted Choi Woobin with unwavering resolve, demanding information and justice.

As the truth unfolded and the gravity of his actions came to light, the shock on his face was palpable.

Despite his pleas for mercy, I stood firm, condemning his heinous crimes and refusing to yield to his empty remorse.

Taking charge of the situation, I orchestrated his confession and surrender, unwilling to let him escape accountability.

With a mix of anger and compassion, I ensured that justice prevailed, even as his pleas for forgiveness fell on deaf ears.

The moment was charged with raw emotions as he was escorted away, a tearful reminder of the consequences of his despicable deeds.

After the intense encounter, I made a call to Jae, seeking solace after the harrowing events.

Exiting the meeting room, I left the company building and made my way back home, reflecting on the tumultuous events that had transpired.

~Unknown Location~

3rd Person's POV

Two hybrids were drained and weak, their bodies suffering from the beatings they received for sleeping in. Locked in a heavily secured cell, they endured days without food or water, leaving their mouths dry and their bodies craving molesols of food. Heavy metal shackles dug into their wrists, leaving painful bruises as a reminder of their captivity.

One of the hybrids expressed a strange premonition to his older brother.

"Hyung, I have a weird feeling," he murmured, his eyes distant.

“What is it?” his brother inquired, concern evident in his voice.

“I feel like something big is going to happen,” the younger one replied, his hybrid instincts alerting him to an unseen future.

As they shared a tense moment, the older brother hoped silently,

'I hope it's not bad, my dear brother.'

°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°○°●°•°•°•°•°•°•°

Hey lovebugs,

I'm super excited to hear your thoughts on this book!

I added a tad more detail to offer a glimpse into the world of the book, just enough to spark your curiosity without giving away too much. I wanted to provide a little peek behind the curtain to entice you to come along for the ride.

A quick heads up - this book doesn't hold back on the intense stuff. It deals with some heavy, triggering content that might not be everyone's cup of tea. So, fair warning, this is not your typical light and fluffy read. It's raw, real, and might hit close to home for some.

I'm all ears and eager to hear your feedback, so drop a comment and let me know your thoughts.

Thanks a ton for taking the time to check this out and for sharing your thoughts. Your support means the world to me! Let's dive in and see where this wild literary journey takes us. 📚✨

Thanks a ton again!

TAGLIST OPEN!!

146 notes · View notes

kkurades · 1 year

Text

KILL BILL ━━━━━ masterlist

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

PARK SEONGHWA regretted nothing more than breaking up with you due to his need to focus on his studies but trying to win you back would be harder than he had originally thought and finding out that you had happily moved on with another man while being a successful idol didn’t make it any easier for him

pairing: biology major!seonghwa x idol!fem!reader x slight!idol!lee know

genre: university au, idol au, social media au, lovers to exes to lovers, unrequited love, slight love triangle, fake dating, angst, fluff, crack, written

featuring: jennie of BLACKPINK ( faceclaim ), ateez, (g)i-dle, jimin of BTS, lee know of STRAY KIDS, nayeon of TWICE, jihyo of TWICE, kim woobin ACTOR ( faceclaim )

warning: cursing, dark humour

status: ongoing

( started on 28/07/2023, finished on . . . )

tag list: @sserafimez, @neohyxn, @smh-anon, @redm4ri, @stopeatread, @yourfavoritefreakyhan, @saiewithakatana, @kyuupidwrites, @i-dont-know-me-either, @aestheticsluut, @certainyouthpeanut, @deadgirlwalking3, @stopeatread, @cookiechristie, @atinyreads, @legohwas, @sollum, @a1sh1teruu, @nikisbf, @s00buwu, @kissezfornamjoon, @hexoolio, @bunnystrm, @dutchessskarma, @satsuri3su, @i-hwa, @delulu4soobs, @moon-gyus, @soulphoenix1618, @lunavixia ( open )

MAIN MASTERLIST ˚୨୧⋆ ATEEZ MASTERLIST

## PROFILES !!

001. full house copycats

002. yn’s ex-family

003. cat mom + gilmore girls

## CHAPTER INDEX !!

one | an upgrade

two | shakespearean talk

three | the hypocrisy

four | my boob and booty’s hot

five | shuhua’s grandchildren

six | matching fur hats

seven | don’t throw up

eight | fanmade yn ships

kill bill © kkurades, 2023.

#✩⋆° kill bill #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa #park seonghwa #seonghwa smau #ateez #ateez masterlist #ateez x reader #ateez smau #kpop smau #bang chan x reader #bang chan smau #stray kids smau

337 notes · View notes

sorryimananti-romantic · 2 years

Text

Where Do I Go

bodyguard!jongho x reader (royal?au)

genre and warnings: angst, fluff, suggestive, violence warning

word count: 23k

synopsis: you're the owner of hotel crescent in mist island, where secrets are traded. you're infamously known as the gossip-dealer and known for manipulating people, which means you're not safe. however, the last thing you expect is your power-hungry father to send jongho to be your bodyguard, but you suspect it's not because he fears for your safety but because he wants to keep tabs on you as he joins prince woobin's side while you join prince hongjoong's side. as your father comes from eden to mist island to become the minister of foreign affairs, the political situation between the two nations worsen and you fear for war, but you risk your life for your homeland, and find jongho joining hands with you as you both uncover secrets and betrayals from your father.

You clicked the necklace into place as you stood in front of the mirror, admiring how the ruby provided a starking contrast with your midnight blue gown, the square neckline making a display of your collarbones, the sleeves full and fitted just like the bodice after which it fell in an elegant flair down to your ankles. You clicked your fingers and the maid arrived behind you, fixing the tied curls in your hair upon your indication. Everything about you screamed mystery and power, and you both loved and hated that.

“I’ll be back soon after midnight- have a warm bath prepared for me.”

“Yes, ma’am,” the maid bowed before leaving and you stepped into your matching flats. For the past half an hour your maid had basically polished you- styling your hair into an elegant but messy bun, doing your routine makeup, dressing you up. It was time to get to the counter and deal with your ‘customers’. You took a deep breath, glancing at the sword that was hanging as a decoration in the living room. Smiling, you left the room and walked downstairs, greeting the maids and waitresses that bowed to you before settling behind the counter, your usual spot where you managed the guests- of course, that was also a pretence among the other things about your personality.

“Good morning, Sakura. I hope everything is in order today.”

“Madame Lee,” the receptionist bowed, motioning you to take her seat- she would now be moving to the other desk until you leave. “Everything is well. I hope you’re doing well.”

“Absolutely,” you smiled, waiting until she was out of sight before you sat and pulled out the register, sitting on your seat and glancing at the few customers you had- some of them were residing temporarily here, while the others dropped by for breakfast- either to meet a resident or to mingle. You sighed, feeling a little bored- you always did, in the mornings it always got interesting around evening, when the people present would exchange gossip and secrets, make decisions that could change the course of this little island that was home to many- Mist Island.

Of course, no matter whether you were busy or not, time flew. You had quite a few interesting guests in your hotel today, and right now, almost 10 in the night, you were dealing with a… difficult client who was testing your patience with every passing minute.

“Look, Madame,” he began, his eyes travelling all over you as he smirked. “All I’m saying is it’s dangerous business to get involved in places you aren’t meant to be.”

“I hope you haven’t forgotten, Officer,” you sipped tea, glad there was a table between you two- you wanted nothing more than to kick him in the shins. “Money buys everything. You, of all people, should know.”

He raised his brow, wondering just what you were implying. It didn’t help that you wore your statement smile that revealed nothing but at the same time, made men shiver with worry. “Yes… money buys everything.”

You tilted your head, pleased to see he was confused. “If you can afford a secret, we’ll have a deal. You know I only give out freebies if I feel generous, or… if it could provide for some entertainment in this boring town. And frankly… I’m not feeling very generous right now, I’m afraid.”

The Officer made a face, nodding his head slowly in denial more than agreement, his black uniform almost blending with the leather chair in the dim lights. “And what pleases you, Madame? I’ve heard it’s not always money that you demand.”

“A secret in exchange for an even better secret, or… something valuable to you would do,” you grinned and the Officer thought you looked like a magpie at that moment, ready to snatch whatever caught your eye. “So?”

The Officer bit his lips nervously, leaning forward once again. “I’m desperate, Madame. I need to know what the Prince’s Right Hand and the envoy from Eden talked about. Don’t you care about the future of Mist Island? I think that should be enough to tell me the secret- I report to the Prince and I think the Prince’s Right Hand is betraying him-”

“You’re wrong about that, I’ll give you that, at least,” you relaxed back. “The Prince’s Right Hand is very loyal to the Prince- all of Mist Island knows that. You have nothing to worry about- you don’t need to know what they talked about now, do you?”

He almost pulled out his hair and you smiled- he was definitely reporting to someone else other than the Prince. You leaned forward, pretending that you were about to share some scandalous thoughts- and perhaps, you were. “Officer.. If you tell me who you really report to, I’ll give you the secret for free. I promise. And your secret will, of course, stay safe with me.”

The Officer paused, thinking about it. He had clearly not expected the owner of the hotel to be so clever and curious like a cat- it could be your besetting sin, he thought. “Hotel Crescent is an interesting place, I must admit.”

“And you’re welcome here anytime. I don’t forget a face,” you smirked.

“Well…” the Officer threw his hands in the air before surrendering. “I report to the Minister of Defence. He’s keeping tabs on everyone around the Prince in case someone betrays him- you know how the situation is between Mist Island and Eden these days. He’s preparing us for the worst, he says.”

You only nodded, giving him no reaction. “We should always be prepared for the worst, in any situation. Well, thank you for the information. One of my maids happened to overhear the Prince’s Right Hand and the envoy talk about changing the Minister of Foreign Affairs- perhaps, someone well known in both Eden and Mist. They would prefer someone from Eden, which would be quite… strange, if I have to admit.”

“Ah,” the officer shook his head in disbelief. “That’s a shame. Someone from Eden as the Minister of Foreign Affairs? Way to make it obvious that Eden wants to take over our land.”

“Well, a secret for a secret. Our deal is sealed,” you winked before getting up. “Enjoy the rest of your tea, Officer.”

You smiled to yourself- you had played this one well. Of course, the Prince’s Right Hand was loyal to the Prince. No lies there- but it really was the Prince himself that this ‘concerned’ officer should be worried about. It still looked like most of the court was unaware of the schemes cooking in the palace. And then there was the matter of the head post of the department of Foreign Affairs-

Oh, how you had resisted the urge to tell the officer that it was your own father who wanted that post. You couldn’t help but think about ways to mess up your father and his little mission to become the Minister of Foreign Affairs here- the audacity-

The bell at the door indicated the arrival of a person and you shook your head, ridding it off the schemes, looking ahead at the man who had a rather big suitcase with him. You smiled at him as you opened the register. “It looks like you’ll be staying here for a long time, Mr…”

“Choi. Choi Jongho,” his voice was low and he looked around.

“Choi Jongho,” you repeated, writing his name. “Room no. 1117 is free. May I ask the duration of your stay?”

“Might be a day, might be… longer,” he smiled politely and you nodded, almost narrowing your eyes- you had definitely seen this face before. “Can I have dinner before I settle in my room?”

“Of course, I’ll get you a table in the corner, if you prefer,” you sighed at the loud group of people that were occupying the centre of the hall to your right. “You must be tired after all the travelling.”

He only nodded in response and you called for a maid, muttering your orders and asking one of the porters to transport Mr. Choi’s bags to his room. The maid accompanied the man to the corner and you finished writing his entry, pausing when you realised just where you had seen him-

In Eden. With your father.

Had he sent this man on business? If he had, he would never have stayed here- you and your father were worse than enemies when it came to business. Perhaps he had sent him to spy on you.

A devilish smile creeped up your cheeks as you shut the register and took a peek at Choi Jongho, who was ordering his food. As soon as he was done, he met eyes with you and you were surprised that he didn’t immediately look away like any other man would have.

You didn’t exactly know who he was- you had only seen him once, perhaps twice, in your father’s office in Eden. Perhaps he didn’t know you as well and this was a huge coincidence on his part, but you couldn’t sleep tonight without knowing the truth. So you waited until he was done with his dinner and before he could get up without tea, you took the liberty of sitting down across from him with a cryptic smile.

“Tea is on the house- unless you’d prefer another drink.”

“That’s very kind of you,” he raised a brow, shaking his dark bangs away from his face. “Madame… Lee, is it?”

“The one and only,” you scoffed. “How’s Mr. Lee doing? I hope Eden has worn him down more than he’d like.”

The way Mr. Choi paused and shook his head, told you that your suspicions were right. You scoffed in disappointment. “What are you, his spy? He must be growing anxious back there since my business is booming.”

“Not a spy,” he told you and waited as the waitress arrived with tea. Once she was gone and you had taken a sip and he was done scanning you, he began. “How did you know it was me?”

“I don’t forget a face, Mr. Choi,” you said and he whistled. “Especially one I’ve seen near my father.”

“He has some… other plans.” When you only raised your brows as an indication that you were waiting, he sighed. “I understand that you had an… accident recently in one of your dealings? I don’t know exactly what you do, but your father thinks it’s best that you hire yourself a bodyguard- nothing too fancy, just a shadow.”

“Interesting that he would suggest so, since he’s the one who cares the least for me,” you narrowed your eyes at him. “Mr. Choi Jongho, I’ll deal with any ‘accidents’ I have myself. You can return and inform my father of that- I don’t require a bodyguard.”

“Maybe we should talk privately,” Jongho noticed the maids at the other corner. “You have a lot of eyes on you.”

You took a deep breath, willing the anger roiling in your stomach to calm down and nodded. “You can come to my room at the strike of midnight. When you go to your room, make sure you don’t unpack- I have a feeling you’ll be taking the next train back home.”

Before hearing what Jongho had to say, you were back to your desk and Jongho scoffed to himself- you were a handful, just like your father had described. Haughty, spoiled, and more- you were proving your father correct. He noticed the permanent smile you wore even as you worked and he wondered if you never got tired- but then again, people like you lived off the gossip that travelled around here.

A gossip dealer, Mr. Lee had explained to Jongho, not going into the details. Gossip, he explained, was a two-edged sword. It could cut the wielder if dealt with unprofessionally. But as Jongho looked around at the hotel that even your father admitted was a pretty successful venture, Jongho had to admit perhaps you did have the brains after all. This place couldn’t run without a good head.

Jongho never went to his room, opting to wait right where he had been sitting, reading the paper and catching up to the news. At the strike of the clock, he found you staring at him and with a tug of your head, he was up and following you to the room on the first floor, at the very end- a suite. He watched you turn the keys and open the room, allowing him to enter first before you shut it behind you and turned the lights on.

“Please, take a seat,” you said and Jongho understood what you meant- stop stalking around. Jongho passed a nearly devilish smirk before he settled down, noticing the sword. “How long have you practised?”

You were surprised that he didn’t dismiss the sword as a mere decoration- or perhaps, your father had told him. What you didn’t realise was that he noticed the blade looked like it had been sharpened and the hilt wasn’t in top condition. “I’ve practised long enough. Now… shall we get back to business?”

“Look, Madame,” Jongho turned his full attention to you. “Things between Eden and Mist Island are going to get rough- this is me speaking, not your father. You need a bodyguard, especially with the job you do-”

“And what, exactly, is my job?” You crossed your legs, smirking. “I’m interested in hearing what Mr. Lee told you about my job.”

Jongho licked his lips, finding it difficult not to groan at your displeasing behaviour. “Gossip-dealer?”

You couldn’t help but scoff at that. “I understand why I should hire a bodyguard- I’ve had this thought for a while now. But tell me why it has to be you, who’ll most definitely be reporting my every move to my father.”

“Obviously your father knew that you’d be against the idea, but I’m patient and he must have thought I’d do a good job,” he relaxed back and you frowned in confusion. “He trusts me, and you can use it to your advantage if you wish. I have to find a few answers on this island as well. Maybe we can make a deal, think how it’s going to work for the both of us.”

You stared at him- he could pass as a local here. He didn’t look strange- plain dark hair, no unusual fashion sense. Everything about him screamed ‘normal’ which was going to be beneficial to you- this was probably a disguise and you could use someone who could pass away almost unnoticed in the crowd. Yet… there was this unmistakable air of mystery to him. Just what answers was he searching for that he was risking his life to become your bodyguard? He had to know just how many people targeted your head on a daily basis, didn’t he? You asked him that and he let you know that he was fully aware of the risk.

“Let’s hear what you have to offer then,” you studied him. “If I don’t agree, we can part ways right here.”

Jongho smiled as he nodded. “I’ll let you choose what exactly I report to your father- you have to give me something so he doesn’t get suspicious. He has other spies here anyway so we should act cautiously.”

“Other spies, huh?” You scoffed- you knew you weren’t paranoid when you felt like someone was watching you at the most random times. “What makes you think he won’t find out about our little deal? He’ll make you regret ever betraying him because you sound like someone he trusts enough, yet here you are, relaxed as you plan to betray him.”

“I think you’re a good actor,” he smirked and you snorted. “And so am I. I don’t see the problem if we’re agreeing on these conditions. I won’t betray you if you don’t interfere in whatever I’ve come here to do- nothing political unlike your field of work, I promise.”

“I think we can work with that. You’re right- he’s going to find out sooner or later anyway. He’s more sensitive now that he’s planning to return here on an official post, isn’t he?”

“You’re quick,” he clapped. “In return… I might need your help a little- not now, maybe later, but there is some digging I have to do and I’d like to keep it a secret- especially from Mr. Lee.”

“I hope it’s something that brings him down- then I can help you with that,” you smiled innocently and he chuckled at that.

“You two really don’t get along, do you?” He shook his head. “So? Do we have a deal?”

“I have a few… conditions. You’ll refer to me as Madame and you will stay a respectable distance from me- especially when I’m ‘dealing’ with someone,” you began and he nodded. “The minute I learn that you’re betraying me in any way, you’re done for. I may not have a bodyguard but I have enough protection to save me from attempts like these.”

“Understood,” he shrugged- it wasn’t much you were asking for.

“Then we have a deal. And make no mistake- I do not trust you. I still think you’re going to be reporting my every move to Mr. Lee. However, I won’t interfere in whatever you’ve come here to do… for now.”

Jongho gaped at you as you got up and went for your room, dismissing him with a rather casual wave of hand. He sighed- just when he thought he had you. “You’re going to be so difficult to deal with.”

“I aim to please,” you said before shutting the door to your room and taking off your accessories, letting your hair loose before walking to the bath.

The bath had long gone cold.

—----------------------

Having Jongho as a bodyguard was proving to be… difficult, to put it simply.

He wasn’t being a bother, not at all. He wanted eyes on you at all times when you were not in your room, and since you were mostly behind the counter or with the customers, all you needed to do was let Jongho go unnoticed as he seated himself in the corner on a chair with newspaper and an endless refill of coffee or tea- whatever he’d feel like.

However, you did not like being watched even though it was necessary. It was just him making you aware of his presence time and time again that irked you. Stealing ‘casual’ glances whenever someone official he recognised entered, smirking when he’d catch you making a deal… a mere bodyguard should remain invisible to you. That’s what you told him in your evening break.

“Well, I’m not a ‘mere’ bodyguard, it seems,” Jongho shifted. “What exactly did I do?”

“You couldn’t have made it less obvious that you’re keeping an eye on me,” your face was emotionless so that anyone else watching wouldn’t catch on. “I get that it’s new for you but can you wipe that permanent smirk off your face whenever I’m dealing?”

Jongho laughed heartily at that. “Is that how it seemed? I’m pretty sure I had no such expressions on my face.”

“You don’t even realise it, do you?” You tsk-ed at him, fixing your midnight-blue sleeves before pointing at the left corner of your lip. “This gets lifted up like this, ever so slightly. It’s annoying.”

It lifted up again as a smirk creeped up his face. “Does it now? I’ll hide my face behind the newspaper then-”

“That’s worse,” you shook your head. “If you don’t improve by tonight I’m sending you back home, with a message to my dear old father that he can do better than this.”

“Go ahead,” Jongho, unfazed, went back to reading his newspaper that you were sure he had memorised by now. “I’m his best.”

“So arrogant,” you muttered, scanning him as you pondered your decision. “Just try to make it less obvious. We’ll deal with this later.”

Jongho, however, didn’t improve even slightly. You were just glad your customers weren’t noticing, and by the end of the night, you thought that perhaps, he did blend in. Since your staff was aware of him now and he could go inside and outside as he pleased, you supposed no outsider noticed him… for now.

And tonight, you needed to see just how good he was as a ‘bodyguard’. You were meeting with someone whose identity was better left hidden, though you were sure at least your father was aware of your dealings with the younger prince’s little gang of misfits. Even if he wasn’t, it was a little test for your bodyguard- if after this meeting, your father finds out whose side you are actually on, he would take swift action.

Before every meeting, it was your strategy to think of every possible outcome and plan according to it. Tonight, you were meeting Park Seonghwa- Prince Hongjoong’s Right Hand, had he been allowed to have one officially. It was sad how the king and the elder prince had pushed the wiser one of their family out of the picture. What made you giddy with satisfaction, though, was that the younger prince was no fool at all. He was one of the smartest individuals you had ever had the chance to encounter, and you were sure he would one day take his position at the very throne he deserved to rule. Not his elder brother Prince Woobin, but him.

People suspected that you were in cohorts with the younger prince, but only to the extent that you provided him with the ‘gossip’. Thankfully, the reputation you had built for yourself preceded you. As it was a public fact that the younger prince had negligible power in the matter of the courts, no one cared. The only person who would care was your father, who had learned the hard way that everything you did had a purpose.

“How am I supposed to protect you if I don’t even know who we’re meeting?” Jongho muttered, casually walking by your side even when you had instructed him to act like a bodyguard and stay a few steps behind you.

“Who I meet is none of your concern, and you won’t be reporting this to Mr. Lee,” you gave him half a smile, observing your surroundings as the two of you walked through the very empty night streets. “We’re almost there- stay hidden while I talk. This man is not the threat tonight, so keep your eyes and ears open.”

With that, you stood at the corner of the street and tapped in a rhythmic beat thrice- a signal to him that you were not alone but safe. Out of the shadows, the tall figure of Seonghwa appeared, face masked and hidden further with the hat tilted all the way down.

“One would think you’d walk right into a trap if all you can see in front of you is your goddamned hat,” you said and he let out a low chuckle as he slid his mask down and tilted his hat up.

“My apologies, though I must ask who exactly that man is,” he pointed at Jongho who waved at him with a rather innocent smile.

“My ‘guard’, if you can believe that. Long story, perhaps for another time. How does the captain fare?”

The captain- what you called Prince Hongjoong in public. Seonghwa nodded, and that was enough of an answer. You continued, “My earlier suspicions were right. The Prince’s Right Hand is very loyal to the Prince, but now there’s another group we ought to worry about. The Minister of Defence is keeping tabs on everyone, and possibly you as well. Also, it is in discussion whether the new Minister of Foreign Affairs should be someone from Eden. I’m pretty sure Mr. Lee is on board for that position.”

Seonghwa raised his brow at that last piece of information. He knew Mr. Lee was your father, and the fact that you were telling him this… “And would Mr. Lee make a good minister?”

“If you wish to make Mist Island and Eden one again through bloody means, then yes. He would make a very good minister.”

“And how should we stop this from happening?”

“Find out who is actually behind this, and what Mr. Lee holds that grants him immunity as he tramples all over Mist Island.”

“On it.” Seonghwa tipped his hat and disappeared back into the shadows, and you clicked your fingers and resumed walking as if you had never stopped in the first place.

“That was quick. Where are we going now?”

“To the place that I once called home,” you scoffed and Jongho raised his brows.

Taking a few turns, you finally reached the house that you had grown up in. As you unlocked the main door and entered what was an average house, much like the other on the street, the damp smell and dust greeted you, making you take a step back. You would never get used to the house smelling like a memory long forgotten. Perhaps, you too were scared of opening the treasure box of memories and letting out the warmth of your mother’s arms. The house was not home after your mother left and never came back, presumed dead.

The truth was that you wished your mother was still out there somewhere, far away even, but safe. Alive. Living the life she wished she had, the one she always sketched in the bedtime stories she told you.

“Looks like you haven’t been here in a long time,” Jongho’s voice brought you back from your reminiscing and you turned to look at him swat at a spiderweb. “Is this Mr. Lee’s residence?”

“He doesn’t use it much, but I assume he’ll be needing it soon- until and unless he arranges for something better. And me being the docile daughter, I thought I’d surprise him by letting him know that I was aware he would be arriving here,” you smirked, putting your hands on your hips as you surveyed the area. “Better get this place cleaned out tomorrow, don’t you think?”

Jongho looked confused- often, the lines of sarcasm and blunt truth were mixed with you. “Why don’t the two of you don’t get along, if I dare ask?”

“A number of reasons, each worse than the other,” you went for your father’s study, unlocking the room with the set of keys you had one of your men steal and make a copy of without his knowledge. “None that should entertain you much. Would you like to make a survey of your boss’ study? I’m sure you’ll find something of interest there.”

You didn’t miss how Jongho’s eyes flashed- so you were right. Jongho must be trying to look into Mr. Lee’s private life, which meant he must be trying to find out something about his close circle or whatever people he had been dealing with in the past. Jongho narrowed his eyes. “And what should I be looking for?”

“Whatever answers you were wishing you would find on this island. Perhaps you will find something if you’re lucky. I’ll be in the room upstairs when you’re done.”

With that, you left him in your father’s study- an act of faith in him so he could feel that you trusted him to some extent. You wanted him to loosen his guard so you could find out just what ‘answers’ he was desperate enough to look for- desperate enough to be a bodyguard for someone like you. You knew one thing about your father and it was that he wouldn’t force anyone to protect you, which meant Jongho had to have accepted rather willingly. Maybe to your father, that was an act of loyalty, but you suspected otherwise- and you had to, to remain safe.

You entered what had once been your room, now barely a fragment of who you used to be as a child. You did what you had to first- check the floor for that one odd sound and lifted that plank, taking out a box and unlocking it with the key only you and your mother possessed- no one else knew this box existed. It was a little secret communication device between you two while she was alive, and you hoped one day she would communicate with you through this as well. It has been almost a decade now since she went missing, but you used to come monthly here until you started coming less as you started losing hope (or hoping she wasn’t going to use this to communicate with you but another means).

The letter you found was the same one you had left around six months ago. You replaced it with a new letter and shut the box back, making sure nothing seemed out of place before going to the window and looking out at the half moon.

With every passing day, your suspicions that your own father had something to do with your mother not coming back without a word grew. Your hatred for your father grew along, especially when he morphed into an ambitious, selfish and wealth-greedy man. You just wished you’d get news if your mother was dead- even that would be a relief than not being aware what state she was in. at least you could mourn her then.

Jongho hadn’t intended to sneak up the stairs but somehow, despite your good ears, you didn’t sense him with his hand raised to knock at the door- he paused, realising this was the first time in the past three days he saw you with your guard down. Candid. Your shoulders weren’t straight anymore, instead looked burdened. Your head was down with some worry that loomed over you, your mouth breathing sighs. Before you could turn, Jongho knocked on the door, startling you a bit.

“We can go now if you’re done,” he scanned you, feeling a little awkward.

“And? Did you find what you were looking for?” You asked as you followed him downstairs.

“Not exactly,” he sighed. “It’s going to be hard to find what would be a well-hidden secret if it exists in the first place, wouldn’t it?”

You paused- you hadn’t expected that. Jongho raised a brow and you smiled. “It looks like we’re in the same boat, even though our quests must be different.” He made a funny face at that and you locked the main door behind you as you exited. “Did you at least find something of interest?”

“Maybe I did.”The glint in his eyes confirmed that and you smiled in satisfaction. It looked like tonight wasn’t a waste afterall.

—---------------------

Whether you would like to admit it or not, you were gradually getting used to the idea of having Jongho as your shadow. Especially when he was proving to be useful in several ways. As a bodyguard, he was doing an exceptional job. Since the relations between Mist Island and Eden were getting rockier with each passing day, making the citizens feel on edge, many of your customers who came to trade secrets with you tried to get aggressive. Earlier, you would handle the situation by either breaking a plate over their head or splashing whatever was in front of you on their face- whether it be hot tea or cool water. But now? As soon as someone so much as raised their voice over you, Jongho, who was preferring to seat himself as close to you as possible whenever you did your job, would casually start cleaning his gun or cracking his knuckles with a glare in their direction.

At first, you were pissed. You thought he was interfering, but when one of them ignored Jongho’s not-so-subtle warning and tried to twist your wrist when you annoyed him, Jongho ended up twisting the offender’s wrist so hard you were positive you heard the snap of bones. After that, word must have gotten out. Everyone who met with you was more careful.

Apart from his bodyguard duties, Jongho was also quite an entertainer, you were finding. He was good at making you smile, and your staff was the first to notice, since they could differentiate between your trademark smile and real smile. Jongho probably did not, and you were glad that was the case. You didn’t want him to think his dad jokes were funny- it could get in his head. Not that he would care- you found out it was his lifelong habit. But since Jongho was good at talking and also good at annoying people, you decided to teach him a trick or two about your job.

“We don’t know how long we are doing this,” you told him, fixing the collar of your periwinkle gown before you looked at him, peeking behind him to see that the customer/target was already seated in the hall. “So maybe you should join me. Maybe you could do some work in my stead when I ask you too.”

“I don’t know if I’ll be good at this though,” Jongho sighed, running a hand through his dark hair. “You’re an expert. I’ll make a fool of myself.”

“You won’t,” you insisted, almost glaring at him. “You already know too much, don’t you? When you have too much information, you need to let it out through different channels.”

“And what’s that channel today?” Jongho looked towards the hall where all sorts of people were present- nobles, soldiers, foreigners, gangsters.

“It’s a test. You have to figure out who he is,” you winked at him and he groaned. You only fixed the collar of his black shirt, ignoring how he tensed under your touch, before beckoning him to follow you, seating yourselves in front of the middle aged man who wore such plain clothes that it was impossible to tell if he was a noble or a peasant. But peasants didn’t come here, and he didn’t look from a noble family, Jongho thought.

“I hope you’ve been well,” you said as you poured tea for him, sliding the tray of cookies as well and he thanked you awkwardly. “How’s your family?”

“The same, but the youngest almost caught a cold,” he replied and you raised your brows.

“I hope he’s okay now?”

“He’s still at the… hospital. Not here, though.”

“Is someone with him?” You continued pouring tea for Jongho who had a sympathetic look on his face as he listened to the man’s story.

“He’s all alone, we couldn’t join him. But we wish to, when the time is right, when the matters are solved,” the man sipped his tea, rubbing a hand over his hairy face as he sighed. “It’s hard to travel these days, and we don’t have enough money to pay the doctor.”

“And you came here for my help?” You asked and he nodded. You took a moment to think.

“Maybe I ought to look at my connections or acquaintances for a reference?” You asked.

“I was thinking about the Minister of Defence. He seems to be an acquaintance of the doctors there.”

“Ah,” you nodded, glancing at Jongho to see how he was following the cryptic conversation. “I’ll ask someone to give my message to him then. Maybe he could put in a good word with your doctor after all.”

“Thank you, Madame Lee,” the man got up and bowed and you followed. “Even if he doesn’t help… thank you.”

You only nodded, watching the man leave with another bow in your direction after which you slumped down, munching on a chocolate cookie as you went over your conversation again. You noticed Jongho staring at you and you cleared your throat. “Well? Who do you suppose he was?”

“I would say an acquaintance, but I have never seen him around Mr. Lee or you, for that matter,” he began. “He doesn’t look like he’s from a noble family, and he doesn’t look very rich either, and frankly, your hotel is expensive. What was he really doing here, huh?”

“What was he really doing here?” You repeated, stifling your smirk.

“I’m just guessing you talked in code words. There’s no patient, no doctor,” he took another cookie as he waited for your response.

“You’re both wrong and right. There is, in fact, a patient, and a doctor, though not quite in the literal sense. He’s a spy, one of his men has been caught by the enemy, and he wants me to do something about it- like either make a deal or force the Minister of Defence to release him.”

“Ah…” Jongho nodded enthusiastically. “It makes sense. But… who’s the enemy here?”

“Who’s the enemy?” You asked him. “I thought by now, you would have realised there’s no such thing as a single enemy. There are several sides. Whichever you choose to stick with, the rest you call your enemy.”

“And which side is yours, Madame Lee?” He asked in a playful tone.

“Not the one Mr. Lee chooses,” you said with a grin and found him grinning back. “You know, something tells me you don’t like Mr. Lee much either.”

“Don’t get me wrong, that man practically raised me,” Jongho brushed his clothes, having finished snacking. “It’s just… he’s a bit difficult, and he keeps a lot of secrets. He’s cryptic. Even as one of his closest personnel, he’s kept me at quite a distance.”

“When do you think he’s arriving?” You remembered discussing with Jongho a few days ago about the possibility of your father arriving on the island quite soon. “It’s going to get noisy here.”

“Should I casually ask? Or would he know it’s not really me who’s asking?” He scoffed at the thought.

“I have my sources, and they say he’s begun packing,” you teased.

“Well then,” Jongho straightened. “If you’re on the side against your father, and you’re both getting involved politically… do you think he would ever hurt you?”

“Do you think he’s never hurt me?” You asked, failing to keep the edge from your tone. Jongho noticed that. With a sigh, you said, “He’ll do anything to get what he wants. He’ll trample on anyone. It doesn’t matter who that is. But Jongho… once he arrives, you’re either my bodyguard or his man. Would you be able to protect me if it’s my father who decides to hurt me?”

Jongho’s mouth fell open as he considered this possibility and you left for the reception counter, leaving him wondering just why he had agreed to become your bodyguard when you were your father’s worst enemy.

—--------------------

Your father came earlier than you expected, but that was both good and bad, although the bad seemed to be outweighing the good for now.

The island had been in a frenzy for the past three days, ever since your father proudly marched to the island, making a clear and loud statement- that Eden was not fooling around. Arriving on ships that included battalions, the man marched with an army to his hometown, and to everyone’s surprise, he and his soldiers were welcomed by the palace.

However, that day, you had an appointment with Prince Hongjoong himself, and he had specifically instructed you to make a public entrance to the palace. You had dressed in your finest gown of deep ruby, your hair tied back in an elegant bun, a black hat that complemented your dress well on top of your head. The ruby necklace was the only jewellery you wore apart from its matching ring for such occasions. You had instructed Jongho to dress his finest as well, and you weren’t surprised when he arrived at your door in a three piece suit, his hair swept back, though your heart sank suspiciously.

However, he had to pause and take a good look at you, drinking in everything he could see. He couldn’t figure out just what it was about you that made you awfully attractive to him- perhaps the way you carried yourself, strong and unwavering. Or perhaps the playful smile you always had on your face, the teasing eyes-

Or maybe because he thought you were simply beautiful.

“Good,” you nodded, taking a deep breath. “You look good.”

“You look good,” he simply said. “Shall we?”

You took his arm that he offered and together, you rode in the carriage sent by Seonghwa. On the way, you briefed Jongho about the actual plan.

“We’re making a statement, dear old guard,” you took off your hat before you rested your head. “We go through the main gate, encounter my father- a total ‘coincidence’, exchange greetings- you exchange greetings, I’ll piss him off. And then, we walk to Prince Hongjoong’s chambers while they watch.”

“Wow, okay, could have let me know earlier,” Jongho mumbled. “Wait- I’m meeting Prince Hongjoong too?”

When your smirk was the only response he got, he groaned loudly, shaking his head in what appeared to be mild annoyance and amusement. “What will I be doing there? I’m sure you don’t need a bodyguard in the Prince’s chambers unless you think he’s a threat.”

“Maybe I just wanted you to tag along,” you challenged and he raised his brow, making your heart lurch again. What was wrong with you? “You’re right, I don’t need a bodyguard today. If you don’t wish to tag along… you are free to go back. I won’t mind.”

Jongho thought for a moment before he shook his head. “I’d like to tag along, actually.”

The two of you shared a smile before you looked out of the window. Something about him today was different. Or maybe you were just feeling strange as you got to know the different sides of him. But you didn’t mind his presence at all now, and coming from you in such a short period of time, in mere weeks? That was new and a little insane, especially considering he might still be reporting other things to your father.

It was a little suspicious that he actually wasn’t. Not so far anyway, since everything was calm. Or maybe this was the calm before the storm- maybe he was waiting to gain your trust fully before he would pull such a stunt. But you were also cautious- you only showed him what wouldn’t hurt you if it got out. And perhaps he knew that, perhaps he didn’t, but you couldn’t be more careful. As you thought about all of this, playing with your necklace, Jongho cleared his throat and you glanced at him.

“Should I… I don’t know, act surprised when I see Mr. Lee in the palace?”

You considered him for a moment. “You know… you don’t have to keep putting an act in front of him anymore.”

Jongho bit his lip- you were very quick and perhaps this was your instinct now. “I think I need to. For now.”

You made an impressed face. “If it would help you for now, go ahead. It’s up to you, really.”

“I don’t think he would like it very much if he learns we’re a team now,” Jongho was grinning guiltily.

You shifted, appearing interested. “Are we then? A team?”

“Aren’t we?” He challenged with a raise of his brow.

“I don’t know,” you shrugged, a teasing glint in your eyes. “All you’ve done is help me so far. I haven’t really helped you back, have I?”

Maybe Jongho wasn’t expecting that, which was why he gaped at you. You waved a hand in dismissal. “If you need some help, I can give it to you for free, in return for all you’ve done.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he promised and you reached the palace. Setting your hat back on your head, you exited the carriage, looking around at the vast expanse that led to the residence of the King, the cherry blossoms in full bloom bordering the path. You noticed Seonghwa, dressed in formal palace clothing, marching towards you and you passed him a subtle nod. Jongho narrowed his eyes.

“Is that…?”

“Shh,” you playfully put a finger on your lips. “What gave?”

“His arrogant walk?” Jongho suggested and you almost snorted as you turned back to Seonghwa, who bowed once.

“Madame Lee. It’s been a while,” he said, looking at Jongho then, passing an acknowledging nod.

“Mr. Park,” you said. “I hope you’ve met with Mr. Lee?”

“He’ll be leaving Prince Woobin’s chambers in a moment. We might encounter him on our way to Prince Hongjoong’s chambers.”

“We better,” you whispered with a wink and Seonghwa nudged at you to follow him. You made Jongho walk beside you and as you took the turn to the direction of the princes chambers, you noticed a few men bowing as the exit the chamber, and noticed the man in the front-

Your father. You weren’t expecting the shudder that passed through you at the sight of that man who seemed to look the same ever since you were a teen- the same wrinkles on his face, the same arrogance around his mouth and eyes, the same stiffness in his shoulders. You continued walking, pausing only when your father met your eyes and almost dismissed you as a stranger until he saw another familiar face beside you and looked back at you.

And when he roared with laughter at the ‘coincidence’, you didn’t hide your wince at the annoying sound. “The person I last expected to see!” He shook his head, looking at his fellows. “You’d call it a coincidence, but I would call it fate.”

You smiled at that as you bowed to him, Jongho following suit as he greeted your father as well. “Have you been well?”

“In front of you, alive and healthy,” he boasted. “I hope you’re not giving my Jongho a hard time.”

“Should I not?” You glanced towards Jongho who wore no expression on his face.

“Didn’t he tell you who he was?” Mr. Lee looked confused.

“He just told me he was your ‘best’,” you rolled your eyes and he chuckled at that and Jongho finally gave in, groaning.

“He wasn’t wrong,” Mr. Lee nodded at Jongho. “I guess you don’t remember the Choi family. After all, you were too young when they passed away, unfortunately.”

You glanced at Jongho again and noticed that he was clearly not comfortable with your father mentioning the incident. “I’m not sure I remember, yes. Anyways, I must leave now- I have an appointment with the Prince here. Don’t expect me to catch up with you later, and I’d prefer if you stay away from my business, unless you have news worthy of my attention.”

Without hearing his answer, you nudged Seonghwa to lead the way again, and the sound of your father laughing sarcastically gradually faded. You entered the chambers and then the office, where the Prince sat behind his desk in a fancy hanbok.

With a deep bow and greetings exchanged, the four of you sat casually and the Prince served tea as he inquired of your health and business.

“And who is this acquaintance of yours?”

“Choi Jongho,” Jongho answered, “I work for Madame Lee.”

“Do you?” the Prince asked and you and Seonghwa looked at each other in amusement. “I heard he worked for Mr. Lee. And anyone who works for Mr. Lee… I don’t think I’d like to interact with them very much.”

Jongho looked at you, confused before the Prince laughed, shaking his head, his dark hair messy. “I only jest, relax. I didn’t lie though.”

Jongho did relax then. “It’s true, I worked for Mr. Lee before I came here to work for Madame Lee. I’m not sure where I stand right now.”

“And do you trust him?” Prince Hongjoong looked at you.

“Respectfully, I trust nobody- not even you, Your Highness,” you gave him a subtle bow of apology and Seonghwa and the Prince both shared a grin at that. “You can’t ask me if I trust him.”

“Fair enough. Shall we get to business?”

You nodded and Seonghwa cleared his throat. “Mr. Lee just met with Prince Woobin- since he’s making clear whose side he is on, I think we don’t need to hide anymore. It’s going to get bloody here pretty soon anyway. And now Mr. Lee must know whose side you are on, Madame Lee.”

“It’s necessary that he knows,” you nodded and the Prince agreed. “And when he stays on his toes, that’s when it’s the easiest to catch him in my trap. You see… My father has a habit of being a bit too careful. I intend to exploit that weakness of his.”

“Would you like to give him a heads-up that you’re catching on?” The Prince rested his head on his hand, elbow propped lazily on the table. “I don’t think he’s the type of person to stop after becoming the Minister of Foreign Affairs, which he surely will- he just secured his position with Prince Woobin.”

“You’re right about that,” you nodded. “He’s after something- I’m not sure what yet, but something that will give him a reason to annex Mist Island- Eden’s prince is funding this operation, I’m sure.”

“Something that will be big enough to provide a reason…” Seonghwa pondered. “Whatever it is, who could possess such a thing? Prince Woobin would never keep it in his residence.”

“Anyone the Prince trusts?”

“Maybe you should look out of the picture too,” Jongho said and everyone turned to look at him. He shrugged. “Isn’t the Minister of Defence very suspicious too? He’s keeping tabs on you all, he must have a reason to do so other than simply being too interested in your lives.”

You nodded, feeling a little proud for a moment. “He’s right. I think we should start there- he’s been out catching your spies too, Seonghwa.”

“I took care of that,” he assured and Jongho sighed in realisation. “What do you think we’re looking for here? Physical evidence of some illegal movement occuring in the court?”

“That’s our best bet,” you nodded.

“Thanks for making time today. We’ll let you know how to proceed forward- keep your eyes and ears open… both of you,” the Prince looked at Jongho and he nodded.

As Seonghwa accompanied you both to the palace gates, you paused before you could exit. “Have you heard any news about my mother?”

“Not yet,” Seonghwa shook his head in disappointment. “I can’t seem to find a lead, and that’s more suspicious.”

You nodded, thanking him. The carriage ride back to the hotel was rather quiet as the two of you sorted your thoughts out. However, that night, after you clocked out, a knock sounded on your door and you found none other than Jongho at your doorstep. You let him in and resumed cleaning your swords. “What’s keeping you up tonight?”

“Many things,” Jongho admitted. “But first of all, why are you obsessed with your swords?”

“Maybe I just like the idea of a neat and clean blade slicing through someone’s throat?” You suggested.

“I still can’t wrap my head around the fact that you actually know how to use them,” Jongho snorted. “I thought you were a spoiled brat who only cared about her business and how she looked.”

“You weren’t wrong, but has your presumption about me changed yet?” You scoffed.

“I now think that you are a spoiled brat who only cares about her business and how she looks- and her swords.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at that, and Jongho felt pleased- that was the first time he heard you genuinely laugh. “You can’t blame me for being obsessed with these beauties.”

“Anyways… What should I tell your father about today’s meeting if he asks? Because I’m sure I’ll get cornered by one of his men pretty soon.”

“What would you say?” You asked, waiting for his response and he nervously fidgeted.

“That you’re obviously on Prince Hongjoong’s side, and are planning to find out why he wants to become the Minister of Foreign Affairs, but you have no idea what to look for?”

“You’re getting good at this,” you smirked. “My influence is clearly rubbing off on you, I see.”

“Bound to happen when I’m with you basically all hours of the day,” Jongho rolled his eyes.

You finished cleaning the last sword and started packing them in their cases. “Do you think I’m doing the right thing, Jongho?”

“I… actually don’t really know what exactly you are doing,” Jongho sighed. “You seem to be doing the right thing but there’s a lot of mystery still surrounding you, and honestly I cannot make a judgement right now.”

You nodded, finally meeting eyes with him. “Why did my father raise you?”

Jongho pursed his lips. “My father was apparently close to your father.”

“When did they pass away?” You asked.

“I don’t recall many moments of them… I think I was four,” Jongho answered.

“But why would my father raise you?” You tilted your head. “He couldn’t even raise me right. He’s no philanthropist.”

“I don’t know,” Jongho was being honest, and you heard what he didn’t say out loud- I intend to find out. “Where is your mother?”

“I don’t know,” you replied, and Jongho could hear the honesty in that statement too. “I don’t even know if she’s alive or dead. Last I saw of her was when she left for Eden almost a decade ago.”

“Was that before or after your father had his shoulder surgery?” Jongho asked and you frowned. “Because she was there before that, in the house. I was there too. I heard that she left for Mist Island- I remember because your father said he wished his wife was there to take care of him when he was ill.”

You felt blood rush to your head- why did your father conceal this fact for you? All the decades spent sending people to find your mother in Eden, when she was supposed to be right here? Jongho noticed your clenched jaw and paling face. “Did you… think she was in Eden?”

“Are you sure?” Your voice was steel and gaze fiery. When Jongho nodded, you took a deep breath.

What other secrets about your mother was your father keeping from you? How would you confront him about this- or rather, would you ever?

“Thank you for telling me that, Jongho,” your voice was still the same- unwavering. “You can leave now- it’s late.”

Jongho nodded, getting up and about to go to the food but then he paused. “If you want… I could help you look for your mother-”

“You will do no such thing,” you almost spat it out and Jongho frowned. “Did my father order you to tell me that?”

Jongho scanned you in confusion for a moment and then scoffed loudly. “I can’t believe this. I just thought I could help and you think it’s not me but your father speaking? I’m disappointed in you… y/n.”

You bit the inside of your cheek as the two of you glared at each other. “How can I trust you when I don’t even know who you are?”

“I don’t know who you are either,” Jongho challenged. “Yet here I am, betraying my boss for you. I should have thought twice,” he said and left the room, leaving your cheeks burning with shame at what you had actually done.

You supposed Jongho was right- he was actively betraying the man who had raised him for you. Maybe more because of whatever he had come here to find but perhaps because one day, he could use your help too. And what had you given him in return? Disappointment.

You decided to reconsider whether you really needed Jongho as a bodyguard… or as a person you could keep close and confide in. A partner.

It didn’t sound so bad.

—---------------------

You found out Jongho could be pretty sulky too when he got angry with someone- or maybe with you, he was being dramatic.

As you went to sit at the counter with Sakura, you noticed Jongho was already having tea in his usual spot while he read the newspaper. He only glanced at you once and didn’t meet eyes with you for the rest of the day. You were a bit amused, if you had to admit. Of course, you were going to apologise- you had been in the wrong- but you wanted to see the lengths to which Jongho could go consumed with his anger.

And the fact that he was usually somewhat rational, or maybe unaffected, by whatever you did? Or whatever stunt anyone else pulled, for that matter? You didn’t know whether to be worried or be amused, so you were feeling both. And the fact that you were worried was something you didn’t want to think about right now.

You weren’t expecting any special guests at your hotel today- usually, whoever wanted to trade secrets sent a message in advance unless it was urgent. But the last thing you were expecting were a bunch of soldiers from Eden advancing into your hotel like they owned the damned place. They looked around as if expecting to see someone suspicious but upon finding no one and having alarmed everyone present, they settled at the bar corner. You sighed- you feared they might get drunk and create a mess. Soldiers from Eden generally had no morals- especially when it came to Mist Island.

Jongho also noticed how arrogant those men were but they recognised Jongho and the man who seemed to be their leader- a rather young soldier with an eyebrow slit- greeted Jongho with a bow and perhaps, asked what he was doing here. You couldn’t hear them but you saw Jongho dismiss him with a polite smile- he probably told him to mind his own business.

“Make sure they don’t create a scene,” you told Sakura and she nodded, pushing her glasses up her nose bridge before she went to whisper the orders to the rest of the staff. You had to take a little break to freshen up.

But while you were gone and the men had a few drinks, it got louder. By the time you returned, you noticed how most of the customers were annoyed and were trying to leave without attracting attention. You groaned, making a mental note to ask your father to keep his minions under control, but then you heard one of the men bark some orders to none other than Sakura who was passing by.

“Hey, you with the glasses! Where are my drinks? Why is your service so damned slow?”

“I apologise,” Sakura bowed. “I’ll check what’s taking so long.”

With a desperate glance at you, she went towards the kitchen and you met eyes with Jongho, noticing even he was annoyed. Still at the counter, you watched one of the maids set the tray on their table while they snickered and whispered things- probably commenting on her and trying to rile her up. Thankfully, she was a patient one, and after doing her job, she was about to leave when the supposed leader asked her where the woman with glasses was.

You watched Sakura frown as she made her way to the men and he started complaining about how she should have done better. You’d had enough- you started making your way towards the group but a loud shatter of glass breaking made everyone, including you, gasp.

“Why are you being like this?” The man was smirking devilishly as he grabbed Sakura’s wrist- the glass having fallen from the table as a result of her struggle. Before Jongho could get up, you raised a hand, indicating to him that you would handle it. Without waiting for his answer, you walked to the group and locked eyes with the leader.

“Is there a problem here?”

The man scanned you rather slowly with a smirk plastered on his face. “And who might you be?”

“The owner of this hotel. If you have a problem, you better discuss with me.”

“You? The owner?” The man scoffed and looked at his gang and everyone started roaring with laughter as if you had made a joke. “I guess you’re better than this one here. I was just looking for someone to… entertain us.”

One of the men on your left tried to grab your wrist. With your right hand, you snatched a plate from the table and smacked it across his head, shattering it in the process, and with your left hand, you produced a dagger from your pocket and swiped it across the leader’s hand that had been holding Sakura’s wrist. They roared with pain while you pointed the dagger at the leader’s neck, Sakura hiding behind you. Still, the leader managed to slice your arm with a table knife but you didn’t let the burning pain take over you, instead, you almost tried snatching the knife from his hand when Jongho interrupted and pointed the gun at the man’s head.

“Are you all fools, parading into the hotel of Mr. Lee’s daughter, creating a scene and hurting her?” Jongho roared with anger at the soldiers and saw the colour drain from their face when they made the connection- Jongho worked for Mr. Lee after all. The leader scoffed in disbelief, earning a smack from Jongho across his face. “Wait till Mr. Lee hears about this- I’ll make sure none of you can ever step foot on this island.”

“We didn’t know!” One of the men yelled at him. You glared at him.

“You’re a guest on this land, sir. You should have acted like one.”

“Get lost before I lose it,” Jongho told them and they all grabbed their things before skittering away, glaring at Jongho this time instead of you. You rolled your eyes, turning to Sakura.

“Are you alright?”

“I’m sorry, Madame,” she bowed her head in shame. “I should have done better. I should have cooperated-”

“I didn’t train you to be weak. I trained you to stand up to whoever dares to oppress you. You should have done what I did- that’s my only disappointment from you,” you smiled at her, touching her face. “You did well.”

Sakura smiled warmly. “Let me clean this mess up, at least.”

You chuckled at that. “You do that.”

Jongho heard that conversation and sighed internally- he hadn’t expected you to be so stupidly brave. “You know… the situation could have been handled in many other ways.”

“Ah, yes,” you turned to him. “I could have slit his throat. I didn’t. Kind of regretting it right now.”

Jongho shook his head. “You should have let me handle it. I’m your bodyguard, and yet… you took the lead. And now you’re hurt,” he pointed at the bleeding arm, the blood trickling down your hand.

“I’ll take care of it- it’s no big deal-”

“Let me,” he said with a tone of finality and didn’t wait for your response as he made his way upstairs, pausing to make sure you were following. The two of you entered your room and he asked you where your first aid kit was.

“I can take care of it,” you said as he brought the kit to the table, making you sit at a chair and he dragged his chair in front of you. You tried rolling your sleeve, flinching- your favourite plum gown was beyond repair as blood had spread all over.

“Just shut up and let me do something,” he fiddled with the kit and you gaped at him.

“Dropping all formalities, are we?” You scoffed. You didn’t get an answer in return- he dipped cotton into alcohol and glanced at you once before rolling your sleeve upwards gently, examining the cut. You pouted- it wouldn’t need stitches but it was deeper than you thought.

Jongho cleaned your wound patiently, rubbed an ointment with a swab and even covered it in gauze and bandaged your arm neatly. After he was done, he was still holding your hand in his and he sighed. “I wish you hadn’t done anything and let me handle it.”

His voice was low and barely a whisper. You frowned, trying to figure out how to respond. “I… handled it alright, didn’t I?”

“You could have been more hurt,” he insisted, finally looking at you. “How many times have you encountered people like these? Do you realise what you do is so dangerous as well? How could you not have someone to protect you before I came?”

“I can protect myself,” you insisted. “I really can. I have, all my life. Now is no different.”

“Do you have to be so stubborn?” Jongho sighed. “Let’s forget about the past, but today… You should have let me handle it.”

You shrugged, aware of how he was still holding your hand- so unlike him. “I know- I just… old habits, I guess. And you weren’t in the best mood either, so…”

“You really think I would have let you get hurt just because we had an argument?” Jongho gaped at you.

“Well… that would have made you a lousy bodyguard then.”

Jongho smiled at that and you wondered why it relaxed you so much- that the tension in his shoulders was gone. “Does it hurt too much?”

“Uh,” you took your hand from him, bending it at different angles. “I’ll take something for the pain.”

Jongho relaxed back, watching you. You stared back, mustering your courage before you took a deep breath. “I’msorryforlastnightIwasrude.”

“What was that?” Jongho scoffed loud enough to annoy you.

“I said,” you enunciated each word perfectly this time. “I’m sorry for last night. I said some things and made some assumptions I shouldn’t have. I know it was wrong of me to do so.”

“That’s okay,” he replied. “I should have… I shouldn’t have suggested helping you. I’m only your bodyguard.”

“No,” you shook your head at that. “You’re much more than that. I took you for granted, it’s just… you have to understand how it is with my father. He’ll do anything to ruin me, which has made it so hard for me to trust anyone. To trust you. I’m trying to, but honestly, you haven’t given me anything.”

“I realise that,” Jongho nodded. “I also understand where you’re coming from. I trusted Mr. Lee for my whole life until I heard something I shouldn’t have and when the opportunity to come here arose, I had to take it. And I might need your help too.”

“Well,” you smiled at that. “I guess we can both help each other.”

“I guess,” he smiled back before sighing. “I don’t remember my parents much. I think you don’t either- our families were close, though. I have a picture- perhaps you recognise them,” he said and fished in his pocket for his wallet, where he had a picture of his parents with Mr. Lee. You nodded.

“I’ve heard my father talk about them when he reminisces about the old times.”

Jongho nodded. “This isn’t public information, but my parents were spies for the King. He used them to obtain information on Eden and other nations. I don’t know what the nature of their job was exactly, but from what Mr. Lee had told me they passed away during a mission- my father was caught by soldiers from Eden and my mother escaped with me. She handed me to your mother before going back for my father- the two never returned, and they were found dead a few days later.”

“That’s… unfortunate,” you frowned. “How old were you?”

“Four,” he said, leaning forward. “Which is why I don’t remember much. But a few years ago, I accidentally heard him talk to one of his closest men- a spy as well. I heard him asking whether he really had taken care of all the people who had witnessed my parents' death. That’s… suspicious, isn’t it?”

“It is,” you admitted. “Do you think he’s hiding something from you regarding the incident?”

“It’s just the way he talked… it felt like he, too, had witnessed it. And if he really has… that means he lied to me. What would he lie for? Were my parents traitors to their homeland, Mist Island? Did they really die because they got caught during a mission? It doesn’t make sense anymore, and I came here, hoping I’d find some answers without Mr. Lee’s knowledge.”

“I think your best bet is asking Mr. Lee himself or the person he talked to,” you pointed out. “My father doesn’t really keep physical evidence of things he’d like to hide.”

“That’s true,” he nodded slowly. “The man he talked to- he’s Mr. Ahn. You know him, right?”

“Mr. Ahn?” You frowned. “He’s his secretary, but… do you know what his real job is?”

“I don’t?” Jongho frowned in confusion as well.

“He’s an assassin. The best of the best. There’s a reason my father is still alive after all he dares to do,” you told him and Jongho groaned in disbelief. “Also… what happened after you were given to my mother? I don’t remember seeing you- I do have faint memories of playing with a kid that could have been you.”

“When your mother came the last time I saw her in Eden, she told me something. She said she wished she could have raised me. She also told me not to trust Mr. Lee and that everything that I thought was the truth was not. She told me I was being used- and then Mr. Lee interrupted and I never got to ask her what exactly she meant. I thought that wasn’t something new- all of us know we’re being used by Mr. Lee one way or another. We know not to trust him with our life. But the way she phrased it… I could never get it out of my head, though it started making sense later when I heard Mr. Lee’s conversation with Mr. Ahn.”

You let that sink in. “Did my father take you with him when he left for Eden? When you were… around six?”

“Yeah,” Jongho nodded. “I was raised in his house.”

“I’m still wondering why he would bother with you- he’s not the type to raise his friend’s kid out of love. If not out of love, perhaps out of guilt? But that man rarely ever feels guilt, so… I don’t know. Maybe he wanted to make a loyal servant out of you.”

Jongho laughed at that. “I was, in fact, that, until a few years ago when I overheard that conversation. I thought I misinterpreted that but then your mother said some things, and I was lost.”

“Well, I hope you can find your answers,” you said. “I’ll look back at the house again- there must be something rather than nothing there, if you found that picture as well.”

“Thank you,” Jongho looked at you. “Why do you think your mother disappeared out of the blue? Do you really think she did?”

“She started to hate my father with an intensity that was unimaginable. She never told me why. But… I don’t think she would have left me alone if she ran away from my father. He says she might have died in Eden since Eden wasn’t in the best shape at that time- a lot of women met unfortunate fates. But you say she left for Mist Island, which changes everything as well. The fact that he keeps insisting that she’s dead…”

“Well, I guess we can establish that Mr. Lee is a liar and we can’t believe a word that comes out from his mouth,” Jongho said.

“True,” you nodded. “I still have my sources looking for her in Eden, and now here too. Keeping an eye and ear out for any news, any sighting of her. I’ve found nothing all these years. I just want to know if she’s alive.”

“What should we do?”

“We plan,” you smirked. “He will become a minister soon- we can’t stop that. But once we find something that shows evidence of his corruption, it’ll be more satisfying when he has to step down. We become aggressive with that approach so he focuses only on that while we look into the past in hopes that we find our answers. Are you in?”

“I am,” he nodded- the plan made sense. “So we really are a team now, huh? Am I still your bodyguard?”

“If you love protecting me so much,” you said and he laughed at that, making you smile as well. You liked the way his eyes curved and his lips stretched into a wide smile. “I’d prefer the term partners, but that’s only for our ears.”

“I like that,” he was looking at you with a gaze that made you uneasy. “I’d also like it if we don’t hide from each other as we find those answers.”

“You’re very cryptic,” you commented. He only smiled at that, taking your hurt hand again and caressing it once before looking at you and almost smirking before he pulled you closer, making your eyes go wide in surprise.

“I’m not protecting you because of Mr. Lee anymore. I hope you realise that,” his voice was barely a whisper and your heart swooped at that. Before you could say or do anything, he hesitated before he brought his other hand to your face and touched it once, ever so lightly, before drawing back and leaving the room.

Leaving you in a flurry of unrecognisable emotions as you sat in the remnants of his touch.

—-------------------

As soon as your father was appointed the Minister of Foreign Affairs, it seemed like all hell broke loose. The uproar in the palace as the subjects of the king expressed their disappointment in the decision could be heard for miles. The citizens started protesting especially when the soldiers from Eden started terrorising the locals, which led to innocent spilling of blood and unfair punishments- it was obvious even to a fool that the locals were at a disadvantage and were being treated unfairly.

However, your father continued to parade shamelessly through town, head arrogantly high and that permanent smug across his face. You had just been gazing out of the window, admiring the clear sky after a spell of cloudy days, when you spotted the person you least wanted to see and groaned audibly, making Jongho, who was sitting across you reading a book, look up at you, laughing to himself when he saw your incredibly annoyed face.

“I’m guessing Mr. Lee is making his way here,” he went back to reading his book.

You folded your arms as you glared at him. “I didn’t think you were actually serious when you said he would come visit any day now.”

“It was about time anyway,” Jongho flipped a page. “He’s really the kind to boast about his achievements, and you being on the side that’s against him… he’s going to rub it in your face. I suppose I’ll enjoy the sight-”

He blocked the spoon you threw at him with his book, chuckling. Before you could pick something else to attack him with, the ominous bell of the hotel door rang and you heard a good amount of people entering. With a glare at Jongho’s direction, you made your way to the reception.

“I don’t believe you have a reservation,” you said coolly, not bothering with greetings. “We’re quite full today, so-”

“Hotel Crescent,” your father looked around, pausing when he spotted Jongho who was pretending he was too busy to notice what the ruckus was about. “Business must be booming these days.”

“More foreigners than locals is not a good sign,” you raised your brow at him. He looked back at his gang of five- all from Eden- and laughed.

“Good thing I’m a local then!”

“Are you?” You scoffed. “You haven’t called Mist Island your home in more than two decades.”

“Well,” Mr. Lee ignored that. “Can we have some coffee then? I’m here to discuss business with you, Madame. Let’s keep it professional, shall we?”

You motioned at Sakura to lead the guests to the empty table, but your father made his way to Jongho who finally looked up and pretended to be pleasantly surprised as he got up and bowed. As they seated, you watched your father have what looked like a serious conversation with Jongho. He was probably interrogating him and hearing what Jongho had to report. You made your way to that table after a few minutes, seating yourself before folding your arms and glaring pointedly at your father.

“I take it you’re getting along with Jongho here,” he smirked.

“Quite well, actually,” you narrowed your eyes at him. “Let’s talk business.”

Your father took a deep breath before shifting a bit in his seat to turn towards you. “I’ve heard you trade a secret for a secret. Any kind.”

“That’s true, but I measure the worth of your secret before I give something back,” you said.

“Well, I have something for you-”

“And with people like you,” you continued, “I don’t really believe a word that comes out of your mouth, so don’t expect me to give you something back.”

He chuckled loudly at that, shaking his head and looking at Jongho as if they could share that sentiment. Jongho, to your relief, didn’t respond. Mr. Lee shook his head. “How about this? You give me a secret about your dear Prince Hongjoong, and I’ll give you something you can’t resist.”

“First of all, I don’t have a very personal relationship with Prince Hongjoong,” you began. “I could have been working for Prince Woobin had he not resorted to ugly means instead of asking first like any respectable man should. Secondly… no thanks.”

“Ah, I’ll let Prince Woobin know that,” your father said as if he was quite friendly with the prince. “He thinks we lost what could have been a wonderful ally in this… game we’re playing.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “I don’t think he thinks that. He has people everywhere. He doesn’t need me.”

“And yet…” he locked eyes with you. “He fears Prince Hongjoong is growing stronger with each passing day, and he only has his own little group of spies and… you.”

You didn’t hide your smirk. “What do you have to offer?”

“I could tell you about your mother,” your father said and your heart sank. “I hear you’re looking for her in Mist Island too now. I could help you look for her.”

“What makes you think I need your help now, after all this time?” You replied, not letting him detect the agitation in your tone. “I’ll manage on my own, thank you very much.”

“I could tell you whether she is alive or dead, whether she’s here or in Eden or in another country as well. Are you sure you don’t want this?”

Unconsciously, you glanced at Jongho who was already looking at you. Somehow, his gaze alone made you gather your nerves of steel back and you looked back at your father. “If you don’t have anything better to offer me, then we’re done.”

You saw your father’s jaw clench and you smiled in satisfaction. If he had offered you the same thing a few years ago, you would have given him anything he wanted. You were not that person anymore. With a sigh, he got up and his men followed. He looked pointedly at you. “You’ll regret this.”

“Will I, now?” You scoffed, getting up and standing in front of him. “You’ll regret stepping foot back at Mist Island soon, Mr. Lee. Brace yourself.”

Your father left with disdain in his eyes and you waited until he was gone before you practically rushed upstairs to your room, shutting the door behind you as you began to process everything.

Your father knows where your mother is. He even knows if she’s alive or dead. He just didn’t bother letting you know, all these years. Why? Was there a reason behind it or was he just a sadistic bastard who loved seeing you suffer?

A knock sounded on your door and you heard Jongho call your name. “Can you let me in?”

“Now’s not a good time,” you hesitated before you replied, hoping your voice wouldn’t crack.

“All the more reason to let me in,” he said. You contemplated for a moment before wiping your eyes and opening the door for him, not looking at him as you went to stand near the window.

“Are you… okay? I know it’s a stupid question but… talk to me instead of keeping it in. I can see that it’s killing you.”

For a moment, you wanted to ask Jongho who he thought he was to make assumptions like these (even if he was right). You wanted to fire him for crossing the formal boundary between you two- even though you two had established that he was not working under anybody now. You wanted to tell him to go back to being Mr. Lee’s loyal servant. But as you glanced at Jongho… you realised he was pretty much in the same position as you- it looked like your father knew what really happened to his parents as well, and he couldn’t ask him. And he wasn’t just your bodyguard anymore- you two were way past that. From eating your meals together, plotting schemes, trading secrets- you were partners now.

“It’s funny, Jongho,” you sighed. “If he had made this offer a while ago, I would have accepted. It’s making me wonder where I stand now. I never pledged my loyalty to Mist Island and to Prince Hongjoong. I’m still searching for my mother. Yet here I am, protecting him and his land, throwing away the chance to end this quest once and for all.”

“You made the right decision,” he insisted. “At least about not letting your father hold that power over you. And I can see why you like Prince Hongjoong- he’s helping you look for your mother even in the midst of all this, even when you never asked.”

Your heart swelled- Jongho understood. “Does it make me a bad daughter, Jongho?”

“It doesn’t,” he moved from the fireplace and walked towards you, standing by your side as you both gazed at the sun setting over the busy streets of the town. “You’ve never stopped looking for her- you’re doing everything in your power. How could you think it makes you a bad daughter?”

“I’m just… tired of looking,” you sighed, putting a hand over your quivering lips. “It’s been years and it’s like she never existed. She disappeared without a trace. Did she abandon me on purpose? I keep thinking that, and then I remember how she promised me that she would never, and then I think I’m a bad person for thinking that-”

“Hey,” Jongho watched you hide your face away from him as your shoulders shook. Hesitantly, he put a hand on your shoulder, caressing it. “It’s okay to have these thoughts. But you know what? You won today. You don’t need that man to help you. You have so many people with you- Prince Hongjoong and Seonghwa have been helping you all this time because they care, because you help them in return. I am helping you- because I care about you too.”

“I just don’t know what to do anymore, why I’m doing this anymore,” you stopped crying, wiping your eyes. “Why am I running this business, putting myself in danger, when I could have lived a quiet life? Why am I doing all this?”

Jongho turned you towards him and he put his hands on your arms, rubbing them as he locked eyes with you and smiled. “You know… I thought you were some spoiled person with too much money and power but you’ve surprised me everyday. You’re nothing like your father. You trade secrets, manipulate, but I’ve never seen it bring harm to the place you live in. Whether unconsciously or consciously, you’ve been helping Mist Island itself- not the king, not the princes, but the land, your home. My home,” he tucked some stray hair behind your ear and your breath caught as he wiped a tear from your eye as well, proceeding to cup your face. “You’re so brave for doing that. Braver than any soldier. And you never gave up on your mother- that makes you the strongest person I know. And I know you’re looking into my parents, even when I never asked for it. You’re loyal to those who you choose, and I’m glad you chose me. I’m right about the last part, aren’t I? Or am I delusional?”

You laughed at that, nodding. “I think I am, unless I learn you’re still working for my father in which case, I’ll kill you in your sleep-”

Jongho shook his head as he put a finger on your lips to shut you up and your heart lurched- the air felt so thick right now, especially with his gaze on your lips. “I do think I should do something about this mouth of yours.”

He looked in your eyes and it was as if he finally realised the position you two were in- mere inches away, his hand on your face and the other on your lips. He cleared his throat as he put his hands back to your arms and you couldn’t believe that you felt anything but relief at that. You wanted his hands back-

“You can lean on me, y/n,” his voice was low. “Let’s not lean on anybody else but each other, shall we?”

You didn’t need to contemplate that anymore. As your answer, you stepped forward and put your head against his chest, almost at the crook of his neck. You felt Jongho tense and for a moment, you feared he never meant for any of this to happen, but then he wrapped his arms around you and you felt… strange, almost like you were safe. You had never felt safe in anyone’s arms before. You could feel the warmth and strength in his arms as he hugged you and you let your hands hold his jacket as you stayed like this for a few moments before you muttered a thank you.

“You don’t need to thank me,” he broke the hug and patted your cheek once. “I’ll be downstairs- you shouldn’t keep your business waiting for too long.”

You smiled at that and watched him leave, putting your hands on your cheeks in disbelief and finding them warm. What was happening?

—-------------------

A few days later, you found yourself back at the palace- but this time, in the middle of the night. You spotted Jongho trying to fight his yawn as the two of you waited for the prince to arrive and you scoffed.

“Just yawn, big and large, and get it over with,” you told him and he sighed, grinning. You didn’t realise you were grinning back until he paused and looked at you.

“What?” He asked.

“You have a… cute smile.”

You immediately realised a few things- Jongho never expected to hear something like this from you, you never expected to say something like this to anyone for that matter, and the fact that you actually thought about this-

“It’s the lack of sleep talking, isn’t it?” He laughed this time, all gummy smiles and curved eyes and you resisted the urge to pinch the cheek of the man who was sitting in front of you. In the royal chambers. You ought to get a grip-

“Yes, but it’s also the truth,” you tilted your head as you watched him in a teasing manner. “Has nobody ever told you that?”

“Okay, stop flirting with me,” Jongho clapped as he straightened. “The prince will be arriving any second now.”

“But he’s not here right now,” you teased and Jongho scoffed at you and shook his head in disbelief.

“I’ll let the Prince know he ought to think twice before disturbing your sleeping schedule because clearly it’s messing with your brain- it’s like you’re a whole new person when you’re sleepy-”

“Or maybe I’m just too wide awake for my own good-”

“What’s happening? I wanna join- it looks like something interesting is going on,” Hongjoong arrived with Seonghwa right behind and the two of you got up, stifling your giggles- giggles- as you bowed.

You really should have taken a nap today.

“Nothing, Prince Hongjoong,” you smiled sweetly at him and he pouted.

“You’re no fun,” the prince shook his head and Seonghwa scoffed.

“You’re one to say,” he muttered as he sat and Prince Hongjoong looked pointedly at him.

“This lad is practically asking for an execution order now,” he pointed at Seonghwa who dramatically bowed in apology. “Anyways, I have information that I need to share urgently. I know what exactly it is that Woobin has been trying so hard to hide. It’s a ledger which proves that the King and Prince Woobin have been illegally depositing funds to… make a guess where exactly.”

“Eden?” You shrugged, “But then… I think there’s a third nation involved?”

“Utopia is funding Eden’s mission to annex Mist Island- it’s nothing new if we think about it. Eden’s government has always been somewhat controlled by Utopia. Eden’s prince is one fool if he thinks Utopia will just sit and watch as Mist Island and Eden become one- they’ll take over Eden right after. I don’t know what they’re blinded by, but clearly a large amount of black money makes do.”

“So the physical copy is here?” You asked and they nodded. “And it gives proof of your brother and father’s involvement?”

“Sadly, yes,” Prince Hongjoong confirmed and you scoffed in disbelief. “As well as your father’s involvement.”

“Of course,” you nodded. “How do you want to proceed?”

“We were thinking,” Seonghwa began, “We obtain the ledgers and either resort to blackmailing or make it public.”

“Wouldn’t blackmailing put your life at more risk?” Jongho pointed out. “They won’t just sit back and let you control them even if you could make the ledgers public.”

“To hold the King and Prince accountable and stop this madness, I need more power- not just the empty title of Prince by my name,” Hongjoong said. “And there’s one way the King would have to renounce the throne- if the senior scholars in the palace, all eight of them agree that the King is not fit to rule anymore. Prince Woobin’s involvement will automatically make him unfit as well, which would leave me.”

“How do you plan to convince the scholars?” You asked. “They’d believe you right away but that doesn’t mean they would agree to stand against the King himself.”

“Have you ever kept… something from all of your years in this business, all of our years working together? Something we could use now? It’s okay if you don’t want to lend us if you have something,” Seonghwa glanced at Prince Hongjoong who nodded. “But I think it’ll be helpful if we have a detailed list or something like that.”

You looked at the Prince and his loyal friend- you wouldn’t call Seonghwa anything but a friend to Prince Hongjoong. A smile creeped up your face and the Prince mirrored it.

“You have. I knew you would have.”

“I have,” you confirmed and Jongho clapped at that. “And I’ll gladly lend it to you.”

“Let us know what you want in return,” the Prince was smiling warmly, but you shook your head.

“I want nothing from you, Prince Hongjoong. I’ve never wanted anything from you. In fact… I don't know why I chose to help you, but you haven’t betrayed me like anyone else would have. You didn’t simply use me. That’s enough.”

“I told you she’s our friend,” Seonghwa grinned at the Prince and you gaped at them while Jongho stifled his laugh.

“I guess you could call it that, though I never imagined I would have such a friend circle,” you laughed as you looked around at the three men.

“I’d like it if you could talk to me informally, Madame Lee,” Prince Hongjoong grinned. “Just call me Hongjoong. Both of you.”

“Only if you stop calling me Madame Lee as well,” you said and everyone laughed at that. “So… I do have a record of all the events that took place because of my business. Would that be enough?”

“We’d like it if you could come with us when we talk to the scholars,” Seonghwa pushed his dark hair out of his eyes. “It would make a better impression- that the Minister’s daughter doesn’t approve of whatever’s happening.”

“I suppose it would be a slap on my father’s face as well,” you pondered. “I’m not sure they would like me much, though. I don’t exactly have the best reputation.”

“That doesn’t matter,” Hongjoong assured you. “So? Will you?”

“I will,” you promised.

“If I may,” Jongho began and everyone nodded. “Has anyone heard of the Twilight Society?”

“The Twilight Society?” You frowned, glancing at Seonghwa and Hongjoong who were looking at each other suspiciously. “It looks like someone has.”

“Where did you hear that?” Hongjoong’s voice was grim. Jongho straightened a bit, glancing at you.

“I imagine it exists then?”

“It existed,” Seonghwa corrected. “Long ago. No one has called its name out loud in two decades.”

“Who were they?” Jongho asked and Seonghwa shook his head.

“Where did you hear it?”

“I once heard Mr. Lee talk to his right hand man about some Twilight Society- it sounded like a name of a place or a group. I forgot all about it, but some recent digging into the past made me wonder if I shouldn’t have forgotten about it after all.”

You were confused- what was he getting at? Seonghwa was looking at Hongjoong, waiting for his sign to either proceed with the chat or shut everyone up. But then Hongjoong took a deep breath.

“Who is involved? Why are you digging into the past? The Twilight Society was dissolved two decades ago”

“My parents were spies for the King- your father,” Jongho began. “I’m imagining that the Twilight Society was some special mission group which my parents were a part of- they passed away during that mission.”

Hongjoong nodded slowly. “I’m not aware of the members of that society, but I’ll look into it. How does this help us, though?”

“I don’t think my parents passed away because of the enemy- I think something happened. I’m sure Mr. Lee wasn’t a member, but he knows all about what happened to the Twilight Society. If it really was a top secret mission, why does he know about it? Especially when he wasn’t an important figure back then? I’m sure none of the members would have told any outsider of what their mission was, or who they were, for that matter.”

“That’s awfully suspicious,” Seonghwa glanced at you and realised you weren’t aware of this either. “I think I should look into who the members were, and see if your parents really were members of that group. I should look into what exactly their mission was, and why no one dares speak of it.”

“Thank you,” Jongho nodded. “I’m sure the scholars wouldn’t be pleased to hear that someone like Mr. Lee knows of the King’s private matters since so long ago.”

After concluding the discussion, you and Jongho decided to walk back to the Hotel unescorted- there was this unexplainable rush of adrenaline you were feeling after finding out everything. You glanced at Jongho. “I really think we should look at my father’s old house again- there must be something back there.”

“I think so too- at first, I thought I was overthinking, but since they confirmed it…”

You nodded. “How about we make a little detour?”

Jongho narrowed his eyes at you. “Isn’t it way past your bedtime?”

“I’m not some old cranky woman who cares too much about her ‘bedtime’,” you pouted. “Plus, I’m wide awake after that conversation back in the palace. The house is near as well- only a two minutes walk from here.”

“Well, I suppose we could-”

Jongho’s eyes caught a flash in the dark and you almost screamed when he grabbed your arms and turned around, hiding you two behind a tree as an arrow whooshed past you and hit right where you would have been. Jongho scanned you once to make sure you were okay. “Do you have any weapons on you?”

You nodded and he dared to take a peek, resulting in another arrow mere inches away from the tree you were hiding behind. You took a deep breath. “You have your gun?”

Jongho nodded. You told him your plan and he agreed. Jongho slid to his left, shooting at the direction from where the two arrows had come from and running to the other tree for cover right as you went to your right, separating from him, hoping there was only one or two persons attacking you instead of a whole group. You were right next to another street and you took advantage of the shadows and your black cloak to disappear into the street while Jongho, being a bait, made your attackers follow him away from you. But what you hadn’t told Jongho of your plan was that you were going to take a detour yourself.

You could hear the attacks- the gun wasn’t too loud thanks to the silencer but you could hear the scuffle. You went for the street across where Jongho was, spotting the men. They were two, to your relief. You produced a dagger from your boot and aimed for the closest person, hitting him square in the back.

If there was one thing you were proud of, it was your aim.

The other man noticed his partner and aimed his arrow for you. You rolled to the side and waited for the arrow to miss you before throwing a dagger, practically blind, and missing him as well. You knew now that he was going to come for you, and you hid and waited until he did. You knocked the arrow out of his grip and almost hit him with the dagger but he gripped your wrist and twisted it painfully. You took off your hairpin, unravelling your hair from the bun, and hit his shoulder. He screamed in pain but unfortunately, his grip on your wrist didn't loosen and he twisted you until your back was flush against him, with the very dagger you had planted in his shoulder now painfully digging in your neck.

"I've waited so long to kill you," his raspy voice made you shiver. You rolled your eyes, about to hit his side with your elbow in an attempt to get free but then the man tensed.

"You move one inch and I shoot you right here."

It was Jongho, right behind the man, and though you couldn't see him, you figured he had creeped up behind you and was pointing the gun at the man's head. The man scoffed, purposely dragging the dagger along your neck just enough to cut you before raising his hands in the air, dropping the dagger. Now free, you immediately turned and went behind Jongho.

"Who sent you?"

"You can kill me. I won't answer."

"You don't need to," you said, voice steel. "Do whatever you please with him, Jongho."

Jongho shot at the man's thigh, his scream ringing through the air before he stifled it. "Come prepared next time… if you can even manage to walk."

Jongho grabbed your hand and you both made a run for the house- someone was bound to come and check what the screaming was about, especially since this was a residential area. Once inside your old house, you shut the door and Jongho immediately grabbed your shoulder, examining the wound on your neck.

"Are you hurt anywhere else?" He asked and you shook your head. Jongho sighed. "Do you have any idea how dangerous this was?"

"This isn't the first time," you simply said.

"Why did you come back? I had it under control-”

“I couldn’t just leave you there-”

“You could have been hurt!” Jongho sounded exasperated but then he shook his head, touching the skin right behind the cut, wiping the trickling blood in process. “You could have been killed, and I-”

“You could have been killed as well,” you locked eyes with him. “You think I would have liked that? I came back for you. That’s it- I don’t care if it was dangerous.”

Jongho almost glared at you but soon he was smiling, brushing your hair away from your shoulders as he tucked your hair behind. The mere action was so intimate, nothing like you had ever experienced before, that you suddenly felt conscious of the distance between you two, the sound of his breath, and his gaze- he played with your hair. “I like you better with your hair down.”

You rolled your eyes at that, trying to push him away but he grabbed your wrists, making you look up at him. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again, okay?”

You pursed your lips, feeling overwhelmed- he actually cared. You nodded, and he left your wrists only to wrap his arms securely around you, and this time, you hugged him back properly, wrapping your arms around his waist and sighing in relief because you had been wanting to do that for a long time now. With a kiss to your temple, he broke the hug, making you raise your brows at him.

“You make me so confused, y/n,” he almost whispered, cupping your face and caressing your cheeks as he looked at you. “I don’t know how I went from strongly disliking you to… this.”

“This?” You asked. “Are you saying you actually like me now?”

“See?” He laughed. “You’re such a tease. I didn’t like that at first, but I’m not going to complain now.”

“I’m as confused as you right now,” you put your hands on his that were still holding your face. “What do you intend to do with me, Choi Jongho?”

He almost smirked at that, leaning forward and planting a lingering kiss on your forehead first, surprising you. His hands went further down your neck, tilting your face as he kissed your cheek, almost trailing his lips down to yours-

Before you could grab him and do the deed, the sound of something crashing in the living room made you both jump and Jongho once again put himself in front of you as you both went for the living room. The window was open, however, the cardboard boxes that had been right under it were almost smashed, as if someone had stepped over them. Whoever had intruded had probably knocked something over and was either hiding or ran away. You went for the window, spotting movement at the end of the street before it disappeared entirely.

“I don’t think we’re safe yet,” you announced. “Let’s get this over with quickly. You search the office, I’ll search the rooms.”

“Okay,” Jongho’s gaze was indecipherable and he went to the office while you went to your room first, checking the box under the floor to see if whoever intruded had something to do with this. However, your previous letter was still there. Sighing, you went to your parents’ room, searching for something you didn’t know the nature of. But anything suspicious, anything that resembled a journal or an entry book, you grabbed that and met Jongho in the hallway, who had done the same.

“Should we wait before we go back? Someone might be outside.”

“That someone could very well come inside too, so let’s just go back- I feel safer in my own room,” you referred to your hotel and he nodded, putting everything in a bag that he wore before and grabbing more weapons before you left. Your walk was swift and silent, and you relaxed once you reached the hotel.

“Someone must have known we were going out tonight- I told no one, though. Did you?” You asked Jongho as you went inside your room and he dumped the bag on the table.

“I didn’t,” Jongho shook his head. “Did anyone see you?”

“I don’t think so, but I think there might be a rat here, in my staff,” you felt bitter at the thought alone. “I’ll think about it tomorrow, I have the worst headache right now.”

“Just sleep,” Jongho nodded. “Let’s talk tomorrow?”

You nodded, and walked Jongho to the door. You called his name and when he turned, you tiptoed to kiss him on his cheek, catching him by surprise.

“Thank you for… everything.”

Jongho made a funny face as if he couldn’t believe it but then he smiled, waving as he left, and when you shut the door, you sank to the floor grinning like an idiot.

—-------------------

“I don’t think we’re finding anything at this rate. It’s all so cryptic anyway- what are you doing?”

You were glaring at one of your father’s journals, the entries very cryptic, just like Jongho had said. You found out that your father usually noted when exactly he met someone and at what place, and you wondered if noting it down helped him with his memory- he didn’t have a bad memory at all. That must be the reason.

“You know, glaring holes into these isn’t going to make something pop up,” Jongho tossed a candy near you and you glared at him once before unwrapping it and putting it into your mouth, going back to what you were doing. “You’ll have better luck looking at these albums- let’s switch.”

You sighed, smacking the diary shut and slumping back. “I think we’re only wasting our time. He’s not one to leave behind any trace.” You exchanged your diaries with the albums and started flipping through them. “And even if we find something, we can’t really link anything to what’s currently happening. It’s a long shot.”

“No harm looking,” Jongho said, flipping through the pages. “Besides, isn’t it fun just sitting here and doing basically nothing? A day off from your duties?”

“I don’t remember the last time I took a day off,” you smiled, but then it faltered. “However, this is the last thing I would want to do on my day off.”

Jongho looked at you then, suddenly curious. “What would you rather do instead?”

“I don’t know,” you stretched your arms, thinking. “Visit the beach? It’s been a while, but now there are soldiers everywhere. I could go to the beach in the south though. That area has been secluded for a while and I have acquaintances who live there. It would be nice to visit them.”

“Well,” Jongho threw the diary back into the bag. “Get up then. We’re going to the beach. I’ll be back in a few minutes, and you better be ready by then.”

“Wait, you’re serious?” You scoffed. “I can’t just leave like this-”

“You can,” Jongho grinned. “You’re the boss here. This place can run itself. Come on, get up.”

“Jongho,” you groaned, looking up at the roof as if that would help. Jongho only crawled behind you and flicked your forehead, making you mutter a curse at which he snickered before pushing you up.

“Don’t be such a brat. Dress casually for once- and don’t tie your hair.”

“Why are you so obsessed with my hair-” you faltered when you recalled how you two had almost kissed last night. You glanced at him and were surprised to see a light flush across his cheeks.

“It just makes you look good. I like it, okay?” He fidgeted awkwardly and then shoo-ed you again, making you laugh as he practically pushed you inside your room. “Fifteen minutes!”

Jongho liked you, you were sure. You liked him too, there was no denying it, but you two were still figuring it out, it seemed. And you planned to get to know him today- not the Jongho who worked under Mr. Lee, but Choi Jongho, the person that he was. You shuffled through your clothes and wore a beige casual gown with ruffled sleeves, leaving your hair half tied with a straw hat, and finally pulling over your black cloak. As you stood in front of the mirror with a racing heart, you realised you were excited. You hadn’t felt like this in years.

Jongho was changing you and your life, and though you hated sudden change, you liked this. And you were realising that he was breaking your walls down. You would never let anyone get as close to you as Jongho had gotten in such a short period of time. You never trusted someone, never asked someone to trust you, yet…

You heard a knock on the door and took a deep breath before taking your bag and opening the door, both of you surprised as you scanned each other- Jongho because you really had let your hair down, and you because he was dressed in a white button up shirt under a brown coat and he looked really, really good.

“Who are you?” You asked, making him grin. “Remember to take your weapons- it’s not safe anywhere these days.”

“I’d remind you too, but I’m afraid to ask just how many daggers you keep on you.”

“Don’t ask,” you nodded, “Shall we?”

The two of you decided to take public transport until you reached the town that bordered the beach in the south. You pointed out a few spots to Jongho and he tried to recall what he remembered of Mist Island. You told him you should have shown him around earlier, but he insisted that now was okay. He also asked why you preferred the beach in the south as opposed to the one closer, when you both took horses for the rest of the path.

“It’s the one spot my mother took me whenever she felt overwhelmed,” you told him. “As you know, my father was absent for the most part of my life. Maybe she missed him. Maybe she just needed someone by her side- someone who was not a child.”

“And the people who live here, the ones you mentioned?” Jongho asked. “Who are they?”

“That’s where they live,” you pointed at a hut at the top of the hill, not very far from where you were now. “They were her friends- I don’t exactly know how. It’s been a decade since I last came here so I guess I will have to reintroduce myself. Maybe they’ll remember me.”

You tied your horses to the trees near the hut and decided to go around the beach first before visiting the hut. The beach was empty, only the sound of the waves crashing and the seagulls in the air. You took off your sandals and Jongho followed, grinning at the feeling of the wet sand in your feet.

“This beach is a lot cleaner, I’ll give you that,” Jongho laughed.

“And there’s no one,” you smiled. “We’ve got this place all to ourselves- that’s my favourite part.”

Jongho watched you- something in you had shifted the moment you took off your shoes and started walking along the shore, occasionally bending to pick a seashell. He followed closely behind, loving the way the wind was blowing your hair away. You turned and caught him staring at you and you raised a brow. He only came beside you to walk with you.

“If we prevent this war and peace comes one day, what do you want to do? After everything is over?”

Jongho thought about it before answering. “I want to move back here. I feel like I’m home.”

“It is your home,” you nodded. “I’m glad you’re finally ditching Eden.”

“I never liked it much if I’m being honest,” Jongho laughed, looking at you. “What would you like to do?”

You took a deep breath, pausing and gazing at the setting sun, the pastels in the sky and the sea. “I want to sell my hotel and find lodging somewhere away from the city- preferably here. I could train the girls here in a variety of things- business, self defence, or even knitting. I just… want to live a quiet life…” you looked at him. “Would you like to join me? You could teach them whatever tricks you’ve learned from my father.”

Jongho threw his head back as he laughed, making you laugh as well. “Yeah? I could teach them how to deal with spoiled brats like you too.”

“Definitely,” you grinned. “What do you say? You and me in this town, away from all the drama. Living in a nice little cottage, growing our own vegetables-”

“Together?” Jongho asked, and something told you that he was talking about a lot of ‘togethers’. You looked at him, watching the wind blowing away his dark hair, his eyes glinting with a hint of amusement, a faint smile on his lips. Would you like to spend the rest of your life with him? Would he like to stay your friend at the very least?

“Together,” you nodded, promising. “If you’d like-”

You didn’t expect him to cup your face and bring you in for a kiss but after recovering from the initial shock, you immediately melted into it, kissing him back, your hands fisting his shirt. The moment couldn’t have been more perfect, and when Jongho broke apart, he joined his forehead with yours.

“I’m only staying in Mist Island if it’s with you,” he admitted, looking in your eyes for an answer and you gave him a nod, kissing him again. The waves washed your feet as you kissed, making you shiver into it, and you both broke apart, giggling slightly. You put an arm at his back, leaning into him as you both watched the sun set, overwhelmed by the emotions so opting to let the moment talk for itself.

As soon as it got dark, you both headed for the hut and you spotted a woman. “Aunt Nari?”

The woman turned and you gasped at how much she had aged- her hair had lost its colour and there were wrinkles on her face, but somehow, she was still graceful, especially in the way she walked to you and touched your face as if she couldn’t believe her eyes.

“Y/n?” She asked and you nodded which resulted in her immediately enveloping you in a hug as she expressed how surprised she was to see you here and how much she had missed you. “Where’s your mother?”

You glanced at Jongho and then back at the woman. Thankfully, her attention diverted as well and she asked who the ‘young handsome man’ was.

“My friend, Jongho,” you introduced and Jongho raised a brow at you before greeting the woman. She made you two sit on one of the benches, lighting the rest of the lamps before going inside for refreshments and to call her husband. Jongho tapped your shoulder.

“Just your friend?”

“What else do you suppose you are?” You teased.

“Well, I don’t know,” Jongho leaned forward, making you lean back as well but he leaned to whisper in your ear, “Do friends kiss like that?”

He was so pleased to see you blush like that, and felt victorious when you had no retort. You were relieved to be interrupted by Aunt Nari’s husband coming to greet you both.

“You’ve grown up so much!” He laughed as the couple sat down in front of you. The man looked at Jongho. “Last I saw her, she was still this much-”

“I was not that small!” You scoffed and the rest of them laughed.

“How’s your mother? I thought she would be with you- did she forget us? She hasn’t visited us in forever.”

“Actually, I’m sorry I didn’t come earlier,” you told them, sipping on the tea before continuing. “My mother kind of went missing a few years ago. I’ve been searching for her but to no avail.”

“Oh, goodness,” Aunt Nari set her cup down. “When did that happen? Where could she be?”

“I don’t know how or why it happened,” you sighed. “Last I know is she went to Eden to visit my father- about eight years ago- and then she never came back. I tried contacting you back then but you weren’t here.”

“That must have been when we thought we’d settle in Utopia,” Uncle Jung said. “We only came back to Mist Island three years ago.”

“Ah,” you nodded. “Well, Aunt Nari, you knew my mother better than me. Do you think she ever wanted to run away? Simply leave everything behind and escape? You know she didn’t have the best relationship with my father.”

“One thing I know for sure is that even if she wanted to, she could never leave you,” she said and you almost slumped in relief. Jongho put a hand on yours. “Did you not find a clue or something?”

“I searched all these years in Eden, but Jongho told me she had left- presumably for Mist Island. I suspect my father had a hand in this- he clearly knows whether she’s alive or dead but sometimes he feigns innocence. Sometimes he slips and says something which makes me think if he’s behind this. I don’t know what to believe anymore.”

“Oh dear, that’s unfortunate,” Aunt Nari looked at her husband and you noticed their cryptic gaze.

“If there's anything you can tell me that might help… please tell me.”

“I suppose you’re grown enough to know this,” Aunt Nari looked guilty. “Your father isn’t the best man, I suppose you know that already.” You nodded at that and she continued, “Your father always wanted to involve himself in dangerous politics. Your mother opposed that strongly at first but then she gave in. The last time she met me, which must have been right before she went to visit him in Eden, she told me she was so close to discovering something about your father- something she could use to finally separate from him. He was always lying to her, that man. She knew he was a liar, a murderer, but he always denied it. She didn’t want to be with a man who she didn’t feel safe with.”

You nodded at that. You could understand that about her. “Did she tell you what she was about to find?”

“Something about this secret mission from the King- I suppose there are a lot of those, but this one somehow involved your father. She didn’t exactly tell me how or why, but she was convinced that your father had a hand in the mission going horribly wrong, which also caused the death of someone she was close with.”

You felt Jongho’s grip on your hand tighten a bit. “Is that it?” You asked and she nodded. “Thank you so much, Aunt. I’ll visit you again. I’m searching for answers myself, so this was very helpful.”

“Just stay safe, kid,” she patted your cheek as you got up. “Stay safe.”

You hugged them both, promising again to visit them when you’ll finally find the answers, and when you were about to ride back, you looked at Jongho. “This has to be connected to the Twilight Society, right? My father messed up something with that mission, it seems.”

“Let’s wait until Seonghwa confirms this,” he patted your shoulder before you two got up on your horses. “And let’s pray it’s not worse than we think.”

—----------------

Now that you had taken a step further into your relationship with Jongho, you were finding just how much everything had changed but strangely enough, nothing had changed at all.

It was kind of funny- you both still teased each other to the point the other would be annoyed, you both still spent most of your time together. He hovered over you a lot while you were working, and when you had free time you two would talk. Yet… the way you looked at each other now was different. Every glance and every touch was more meaningful. You two didn’t have much experience in that field so you two were navigating your way together, at a calm pace.

However, sometimes all you wanted was for him to hold you. Sometimes, at night after wrapping up, if you both were up for one last cup of tea or coffee, you two would sit by the fire in each other’s arms. He would massage your shoulders or you would play with his hair. Such simple gestures filled your heart with an overwhelmingly good feeling. And sometimes, when he would tuck your hair back before he kissed you, you would want to live in that moment forever.

You both were still trying to figure out just what Mr. Lee’s role was in the disappearance of your mother, in the Twilight Society’s mission that had failed. With each passing day, there was this undeniable tension growing around you two. Mr. Lee was your father, and he was the man who raised Jongho. Though you two badmouthed the man all you wanted with each other, things were different now as the suspicions grew.

As you closed the register and instructed Sakura to take the files to the storage, you glanced at Jongho who was sitting in a corner, going through some of his own work. He wanted to buy some land here since he had a lot of money from his time in Eden, and he was also trying to acquire the land that had once been his- his father’s home. You put your face in your hands as you watched him dreamily, your attention diverting when the bell rang and the customers entered-

Prince Hongjoong. Seonghwa. And a few guards. For a moment, your heart sank and an eerie silence fell in the hotel, prompting Jongho to look up as well. But when the Prince smiled after spotting you, you relaxed.

“I’m just here to grab coffee with you, can you tell everyone to relax?” Hongjoong laughed as you greeted him.

“They can’t help it,” you grinned.

“I’ll ask the guards to stay outside,” Seonghwa said and you led Hongjoong to the sitting area, who decided to sit with Jongho when he spotted him. Seonghwa joined and you had a maid take their order.

“Are you free right now?” Hongjoong asked.

“I am,” you confirmed. “What prompted you to get coffee this late at night? Shouldn’t you be getting your royal sleep or something?”

Hongjoong chuckled. “I thought I’d visit here and boom your business. It’s been a while since I last came here.”

You nodded- it had been years. The only time he had visited was when he wanted to personally scout you. Hongjoong grinned. “I’ll visit more now, now that we’re… friends.”

“After all of this is over, this place might be no more,” you surprised him with that. “So visit more often, preferably months apart instead of years.”

“Alright,” Hongjoong nodded, glancing at Seonghwa and Jongho who were engaged in some discussion. “We’ve found out everything, y/n. About the Twilight Society. We have gathered proof, and I would like it if you could visit the day after tomorrow so we can talk to the scholars.”

Your heart sank. “Of course. Are you going to tell me what you learned?”

“After coffee,” Hongjoong sighed. “And alone. More because Jongho would need to be alone when he hears it.”

You glanced at him, your heart breaking. “How bad is it?”

“Worse than we thought,” Hongjoong sipped on his coffee. “I’m guessing you have a vague idea of what might have occurred as well.”

“I’ll let you tell me- I really don’t want to assume,” you took a big sip of your coffee, a million thoughts in your head, nothing making sense. Hongjoong talked a bit about the scholars and how they would like to hear whatever information you all would bring forward, but you could only pay him half the attention.

“I’ll brief him,” Seonghwa was the first to get up along with Jongho, who looked like he had no clue what he was going to hear. Seonghwa passed a subtle nod to Hongjoong and he got up as well. That was when Jongho got confused, when all of you made your way up the stairs. Jongho brushed his hand with yours, asking if everything was alright. You only squeezed it with a sad smile. “I’ll see you after we get briefed.”

Jongho nodded, confused when you parted ways in the hallway, Hongjoong following you to your room. He hadn’t missed the exchange between you two. “Is there something going on between you and Jongho?”

When you looked at him, your sad eyes were all the confirmation he needed. “Oh goodness. I didn’t realise how close you two were. Should I ask Seonghwa to stop-”

“That’s okay,” you urged him to take a seat. “Let’s hear it and get it over with.”

Hongjoong told you then. The only survivor of Twilight Society was the man who was now your father’s right hand man, who had actually faked his death on the documents to escape to Eden under the protection of your father. “Jongho’s parents were initially spies for the King before they met and fell in love. After their marriage, when Jongho was about two years old, the King gave them a mission which came to be their last.

“My father cherished his team, but this mission was risky. His spies were loyal to him so they wanted to take on this mission- they had to infiltrate Eden’s palace to retrieve some stolen documents. The mission was a success, actually. They came back unharmed, but Mr. Ahn- your father’s right hand man- he teamed up with your father to take all the glory for themselves. They stole the documents, and your father… he killed all the spies except him. After having a look at the documents, he made a copy and gave that to the King, but kept the original for himself, which is why he holds so much power.”

“Oh, goodness,” your hands were trembling when you brought them to your face. “My father killed his friends? Jongho’s parents?”

“We captured Mr. Ahn a few days ago, and he finally gave us some information but it was ugly,” he grimaced and you understood. “I’m sorry about this. I don’t know how Jongho will take it.”

“He raised him, Hongjoong,” you took a deep breath, willing your anger to subside but to no avail. “That man, that filth- he killed his parents and then raised him himself. What sort of a person does that? Jongho would have been loyal to him still had he not accidentally heard his conversation with Mr. Ahn and my mother’s warning-”

You paused. Your mother had gone to Eden. She had warned Jongho about a truth that she had discovered. Your father had heard her, and then she never came back.

“What’s wrong?” Hongjoong frowned when he watched your face go pale.

“I think he might have killed my mother too- she found out about the Twilight Society, Hongjoong,” you looked at him, fists clenching. “He would not have let her live, would he?”

Hongjoong sighed. “I think Seonghwa has something he would want to tell you about that matter.”

You waited, furious at everything and everyone, Hongjoong patting your back and then Seonghwa knocked and entered. One look at you and he felt like you had already connected the dots. He walked to you and sat beside you. “I’m sorry, y/n. Mr. Ahn told me your father… killed your mother. I don’t know if it’s true though- I can’t be sure if he’s lying or not.”

“I know he did,” you wiped your eyes. “He’s always hinted at that. And I’m going to kill him for that-”

“You will do no such thing,” Hongjoong’s voice was serious. “I get that you would want revenge. Jongho would too. But let us, let me handle it. People like Mr. Lee, their crimes should be made public. They need to fall from all that glory, and they need to feel the shame. I’m sorry, but he doesn’t deserve the swift death that you or Jongho would give him.”

You took a deep breath- somehow, Hongjoong was right. And somehow… you felt like you had known all this for a while. What kind of a man your father was. You nodded. “We can go to the scholars tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow then,” Hongjoong said. “I promise we’ll wrap up your father’s case quickly. This bloody mess shouldn’t turn into a war. Enough lives have been lost. Prince Woobin will be held accountable for possessing this knowledge and keeping it to himself as well.”

You were surprised to hear that- but then again, the relation between Prince Woobin and Prince Hongjoong was much like that of the one between your father and you. You thanked him for coming to tell you both in person, and when you shut the door, you thought of Jongho.

Mustering your courage, you walked to Jongho’s suite, finding the door unlocked and you went inside, where you could hear Jongho’s soft sobs inside his room, the door shut. You wondered if you should back off and let him have some time to himself. He probably hated you and didn’t want to see you. After all, you were the daughter of the man who had killed his parents. With a wet face, you took a few steps until you were right in front of the door and then slid down, your back to the door. You could hear him- he was probably in the same position as you, with his back to the door too.

“Jongho,” you called and he fell silent, having heard you. “I’m so, so sorry Jongho. I- I don’t know what to say. I just want you to know that I’m sorry-”

He heard you break into sobs and he wiped his face. He heard you continue, “You can hate me. You’re allowed to hate me. Just let me see you once, please.”

Jongho couldn’t hate you- how could he ever? That man who was your father had also killed your mother. He had stolen as much from you as he had from him. You both were victims. Yes, you were your father’s daughter, but…

You were nothing like him, he thought. Your kindness, your dedication, your loyalty… you had basically freed him from the man who had held his clutches all those long, miserable years. You hadn’t caged him like your father had caged him. You were your mother’s daughter, the woman who had raised Jongho with enough love to last him a lifetime, the woman who had warned him and in the process, lost her life. Jongho couldn’t hate you. He felt sorry towards you- your mother had died because of him.

For a few minutes, the two of you sat like that until you heard Jongho get up and you moved away from the door, opting to rest your back against the wall. A few more minutes passed before Jongho finally opened the door and saw you with a black but wet face, knees drawn to your chest. He sat down beside you and some silent moments passed before he spoke.

“I hate Mr. Lee. Probably as much as you hate him, probably more.”

“I know,” you sniffed.

“But y/n, what makes you think I would hate you?” he asked softly and you glanced at him. “I want to apologise too. Your father must have killed your mother after he heard her talk to me. She risked herself for me, and ended up dying. I’m sorry, y/n.”

“No, no,” you shook your head, turning to face him. “That’s not your fault at all.”

“Then you can stop crying, because being your father’s daughter is not your fault as well,” he simply said, facing you and taking your hands in his lap, caressing them as he continued. “We both lost so much because of that man. I think we should stop blaming ourselves now. I know that my parents have been dead for years now, but you only just found out about your mother. I’m so sorry for that.”

You nodded, looking down at your joined hands. “I’d understand if you don’t want to be together anymore, though-”

“And why would I leave you?” He tugged at your hands, making you look at him and your heart softened at the way he was looking at you. “You’re just y/n to me. The daughter who looked for her mother all those years. The woman who was strong enough to stand on her own feet when she was alone. The person who saved her home, Mist Island, by choosing the right side. The person who risks her life for the people she loves, for the people she chooses. The person I fell in love with- it’s not Mr. Lee’s daughter. It’s simply you.”

You smiled at that, tears rolling down your face again. “That was cheesy.”

“Yeah?” Jongho laughed, cupping your face as he wiped your tears, his gaze suddenly dark. “Tell me you love me too, y/n.”

You took his hands away from your face only to let him hold your waist as you crawled near him, sitting in his lap, running a hand through his hair, cupping his surprised face and kissing his lips once. “You made me realise there’s more to life than just chasing after something I can’t see. You’ve made me feel safe, and you made me feel loved. I wouldn’t trade it for anything else- I love you, and you only.”

Jongho sighed at that, resting his head on your shoulder as you held him, as if he was trying to let this sink in. His hands caressed your waist softly, and you played with the hair on the nape of his neck. When he finally shifted, he brought one hand to cup your neck as he kissed it, right at your weak point and you stifled a sigh. He felt that, and you could feel his smirk through his lips as he continued to kiss you along your neck, attacking your sweet spot way too many times until you moaned. You slapped the back of his neck. “Jongho!”

“I love the sounds that you make,” he muttered, cupping your face and swallowing any response you had as he kissed you with a feverish desperation- showing you that he loved you, that he didn’t want to lose you, that he didn’t care who your father was because you were the one that he wanted. You tried matching his pace but you let him have his way as he kissed all his worries and anxieties away, leaning into you with a force that had your back arching until you held onto him as he laid you down on the floor.

“You’re so beautiful,” he said as the two of you tried to catch your breaths, as he caressed your hair. “You’re… so beautiful.”

You couldn’t hide the flush that creeped up your cheeks- you wouldn’t have believed it had he not been looking at you with such an intense gaze. You let your hands travel down his chest, stopping at his waist, earning a sharp intake of breath from him, and he waited no further to start peppering kisses down your face, down your neck, and then you were making out again without any signs of stopping.

“Shall we take this to bed?” You suggested when you two broke apart to catch your breath. He smiled as he lazily kissed your lips again and again.

“If you’d like, Madame,” he whispered into your ear, tugging at your earlobe with his teeth and you laughed, smacking his chest.

“You’re naughtier than I thought.”

“Oh, you haven’t seen the best of me yet,” he said, picking you up effortlessly, earning a little scream from you, and you knew Jongho was strong but the way he had picked you up? Without flinching? It was hot, and it sent heat rushing through your body, especially when he put you down on the bed ever so gently.

“It’s a challenge,” you grinned, and he didn’t disappoint you for the rest of the night.

—----------------------

Mist Island had changed a lot in the past few weeks, ever since Prince Hongjoong was officially appointed as the person in charge of the palace, Prince Woobin having been exiled for his crimes, and the King having stepped down from the throne. Hongjoong wasn’t king yet, but already the people were absolutely pleased with him- all the traitors to the safety of this land were behind bars.

That included your father- with the heaviest sentence. His involvement was not made public simply because it would have caused the people to lose faith in their government and their officials, even though all of you would have loved to see his walk of shame. He had committed every crime that he possibly could, and the world was better off knowing such a monster never existed in the first place.

You also found out just who the rat in your staff had been, who had been reporting to your father and the reason you were almost killed that night when you visited the palace. It was none other than Sakura- the person you worked closely with, the manager when you were absent. However, surprisingly enough, she had come clean to you herself, claiming to not know the extent your father was willing to go (after all, what father would do that to his own child?) and claiming that she was threatened with her own life too.

You let her off the hook, only because you were closing down Hotel Crescent. A friend of yours from Eden was visiting and offered to buy the place, and you were glad for the timing. It couldn’t have been more perfect. You wrapped up everything in a matter of days before handing him the keys and taking what little you owned to your house.

You were going to keep the house, but you weren’t going to live there. You still wanted to move to the south, and you had even bought land near the beach, where currently your house was being constructed. Your and Jongho’s house, with wide gardens so you two could train people as well, just as planned.

You looked at Jongho, laughing over something with Seonghwa and Hongjoong, who were currently in your house. You smiled to yourself, picking up the tray and setting the tea and snacks in front of them before sitting beside Jongho. “What’s so funny?”

“I have a job offer for you,” Hongjoong was grinning and you raised a brow in amusement. “I will be crowned king soon. Seonghwa would of course be my Right Hand, but I could use both of you too. I’d like you as my advisor, and Jongho as the head of security. If you’d like.”

You poured tea for him and laughed a bit as you looked at Seonghwa and Hongjoong’s faces, anxiously waiting for your answer. “I… would love that-”

“See, I told you she’d agree!” Hongjoong began-

“But,” you interrupted, “Not now. I don’t think I’d make a good advisor right now. I would like to live peacefully for a while, without a threat on my head as it has always been. You, of all people, would understand that.”

Hongjoong smiled warmly. “Of course. What do you plan to do?”

“Live with Jongho at the beach in the south,” you picked his hand and showed off your engagement rings to the two of them who clapped enthusiastically. “Just take a breather. Maybe train the women there in various skills. Jongho would like to do something similar as well.”

“You two could train our future spies while you’re there,” Seonghwa looked at Hongjoong who nodded and then at Jongho. “Would you like that?”

“Training your spies for you, but they would be answering to me,” you sipped on your tea and everyone laughed. You shook your head. “I would… like that, actually. And maybe once I’ve had enough of the seaside and once we’re sick of the beach, we’d come back. What do you say?”

Jongho squeezed your hand. “Sounds like a plan.”

“Well then, do come visit often. Don’t just forget us,” Hongjoong said.

“Don’t pretend not to recognise us when we come to visit,” Jongho said and everyone laughed at that.

“You’ll make a very good king, Prince Hongjoong,” you told him and his eyes gleamed at that. “Don’t disappoint us. Remember- we can always kill you in your sleep.”

“Maybe I shouldn’t have made friends with you,” Hongjoong looked at Seonghwa who was grinning.

The four of you talked and joked and teased each other for a good while until it was time for the Prince to leave. You told them you were leaving for the south tomorrow as well. They shook hands with you and thanked you for your service. Hongjoong said, “I owe a lot of my success to you. I hope you know that, and I hope you appreciate that my doors are open for you, whenever you’d like.”

“And I owe the fact that I’m taking a breather to you too,” you nodded. “Come visit me for a vacation sometime.”

The two left and Jongho put an arm around your shoulder. “I’ll kind of miss them, even though I haven’t known them for long.”

“I know,” you smiled. “They really grew up on me.”

“You looked pleased when you showed off our rings,” Jongho teased and you laughed. “Are you that happy?”

“Of course I am,” you turned to him, straightening his shirt before putting your hands on his shoulders. “I’ll show it off to everyone I meet. I’m proud of us.”

Jongho smiled at that, and as you hugged each other, you knew that you’ll be at home with him wherever you go- whether it be the palace or this house or the south, or even another place, faraway.

He was your home.

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