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#when it comes to its morals and story structure

punkitt-is-here · 7 months

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Yknow i love fo4 and fo76 as games but hate them as Fallout games yknow?

Like theyre nice to play and i love some of the characters but man. They just. Are not Fallout. Its literally like if you took Fallout but made it for a general audience, theres no spice!! Theres no grime!! Why is everything so clean!!!

That's the thing; these games are built with inherently different base goals in mind. Bethesda in the modern day thrives off selling the idea of player empowerment, of being an explorer in a foreign land that you conquer through hard work. You shape the world to your liking by questing and exploring and conquering. And genuinely? I got no problem with that. I think games that gas the player up like crazy and set you loose on a world to make it your own are totally fine conceptually! Like, the fantasy of being able to shape the world the way you see fit is something I think a lot of people can get into, whether you're just looking for control in your life or you just want the experience of feeling like you can have some grand effect on the world at large.

But because of that, I think the core of what makes Fallout so interesting has to be put on the backburner. I don't play Fallout to feel powerful necessarily, and I certainly don't play it for the fuckin' gunplay. I play it because it has such a fun dedication to weird stories that feel like they have something to say, a staff of writers dedicating their time and effort to being a proto-DM at a table, trying to provide interesting and thought-provoking or at least real damn fun stories in front of you, because ultimately, the West Coast Fallout games are about people. They're about characters! And when you focus less on the idea of telling stories in a world and more on empowering the player as a fourth-wall observer, those priorities clash and in the East Coast Fallout's cases, it makes for a game with no spice or edge. Having something to say about, say, the US Military or American Expansionism and Exceptionalism or the nature of clinging to the past kind of fundamentally clashes with the player empowerment fantasy that Bethesda Fallout games want to sell you. You can't have these philosophy-based, morally-interesting factional conflicts that want the player to look inward when the very concept of your game is built around collecting loot and shooting guys instead of learning about that loot and learning about those guys you're shooting and why you're shooting at each other. Having radiant quest loot loop gameplay just doesn't mesh well with a world where choices are meant to have far-reaching impact, because if it did, it'd be impossible to program under a normal development timeframe, and it would likely make the player look inward and go "what the fuck am I doing with my time?" at the endless meaningless quests to go on.

I don't think the "Lone Wanderer Comes Across A Microcosm Of Adventure" format is bad, not at all, but you have to put a lot of work to make that feel cohesive with the larger character and faction-based narratives that 1, 2, and NV are built on, so instead those Bethesda-style games opt more for a toybox, playground approach to the post apocalypse. And when your primary goal is showing the player how cool of a sandcastle they can build, it'll never be structurally sound enough to sustain even a wave of nuance.

#my posts #asks #i-am-loco #fallout

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kotir-propaganda · 11 months

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Mossflower has so much going for it, like I’m not even being biased because my blorbo is in it. I will die on the hill of it being Best Redwall Book for several reasons.

-It’s as early Redwall as you can get without actually being Book 1. As such, it avoids a lot of subjects and patterns that would later become repetitive tropes... but it also avoids the Book 1 jankiness of horses and human structures and the implied existence of Portugal. The world as we will come to know it feels more or less fully realized here. The abbey’s not here yet, but its foundation literally is- and we also get our first look at Salamandastron and the extent of Mossflower Wood as a whole.

-It has some of the most solid protagonists around. The legendary hero Martin is here, but he’s at a low point for most of the story and has to work his way up to that legacy! And this is where he does it, this is what future Redwallers remember him for, not the events of Martin the Warrior. Also, Gonff is here? Hello? Maybe the single most charismatic character in the series? Not to mention Dinny, how often does a humble mole actually get to go on a quest in these books?

-This isn’t even getting into how badass all the rest of the woodlanders are, too, but... they absolutely are. This is a small band of rebels that’s been driven from their little houses, they don’t have the luxury of those huge sandstone walls to protect them, but they’re still fighting like hell and outsmarting their enemies to boot. Some of them are seasoned fighters, but some of them are just ordinary families, all banding together to take back their homeland. And they keep it up the whole time! They’re not just waiting around for a guy with a sword to tell them what to do!

-The villains are probably the most nuanced in the whole series. Seriously. There are four whole wildcats here (don’t forget Sandingomm!) and only ONE of them is unquestionably evil. It’s absolutely implied that Verdauga was a fearsome warlord in his day, but if nothing else, he raised ONE kid who turned out to be about as Lawful Good as you can get, and he actually scolds Tsarmina for being mean to her brother!! I wish we could have spent a little more time with Verdauga, honestly, I have so many questions for this man.

-There are a decent handful of morally grey characters here, actually. Chibb spies for the woodlanders, but he’s not the most dependable and is motivated by payment more than sympathy to their cause. Snakefish allies with our questing heroes, but he minces no words in warning them that he’ll just as soon eat them if it comes down to it. Even Argulor is really just out here looking for a bite to eat and can you really blame him, because ashleg is a snack

-Tsarmina herself is irredeemably cruel, but even still there are multiple facets to her. On one hand, she’s scary- big and powerful and ready to rip into anything/anyone with her bare claws. At the same time she can be a clever strategist when she wants to be- poisoning her father and framing her brother, and later manipulating two of her obstacles, Argulor and Bane, into taking each other out. And still yet it can be kind of funny to watch her in action, as she gets humiliated by the resistance on multiple occasions. And maybe there is even a little pathos there, as we see her mind start to slip, and get some glimpse into the deep fear and paranoia that completely overtake her at the end.

-There are just great supporting characters on both sides. Mask is amazing, Fortunata is fantastic. And yeah, Blorbo Supreme Ashleg is here, and I don’t NEED to write a whole essay about him to promote Mossflower as a whole but... having him here is nice! It helps!! May we all follow his example and pursue happier lives for ourselves!!!

-Mossflower laid the foundation for so many events and characters of later books. I mean yeah, it’s a prequel. It’s there to support the first book and by extension, everything that comes after. But so many other great titles in the series have a direct line to Mossflower, from Outcast to Long Patrol to Lord Brocktree and more. Did you enjoy those books? You’re welcome. The threads were already there, just waiting to be expanded upon.

-at one point a wooden leg gets used as a projectile weapon and if you don’t think that’s the best thing ever, I don’t know what else to tell you buddy

#redwall #mossflower

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bonefall · 2 months

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i have been following most of your posts and you're once again posting banger after banger because. oml. the more you start to really look at most of the material the more you realize that theres.... a lot of unhealthy and scary messages. ANYWAYS!! i shall be doing a deep dive on your analysis now, thanks ^^

Warrior Cats is a particularly egregious series when it comes to its pernicious ideas about abuse and loyalty, but I think what gravitates me to analyzing it is that it's just REALLY LOUD about incredibly common conservative ideas

Blood is very special and uniquely ties those who share it

Your nation and ideals must be defended from degenerates, such as rebellious young people and evil foreigners

Society is corrupted by bad individuals, not bad systems

And even less overtly political sorts of traditional ideas, concerning ideal family structure (nuclear), how women should behave (nurturing), the moral importance of religious faith. What's unique about WC is that it's like it's ALL here.

The sprawling generations lets you see what the team believes causes conflict as both current events and the history it becomes. The expansive cast gives you tons of characters to compare and contrast. The sheer amount of books gives you nearly endless material to snuffle through.

You don't leave WC and suddenly stop seeing these ideas, they're just so obvious here that it makes for good analysis. Like a broken machine with all the cogs and circuits exposed. Learn to think critically about the messages a story contains, what they look like in different forms, and you can recognize them wherever you go.

#Anyway thanks for the compliment I cannot be normal ever <3 #Bone babble

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mikkeneko · 1 year

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There’s a particular school of thought I see pop up again in the endless discourse about ATLA and SU which I think of as the Inglorious Basterds School of Media Analysis (also known as the Nonviolence Is Bad Actually school.)

Its tenets are more or less as follows:

It is not only moral to kill evil, it is immoral not to do so.

There are categories of people it is always both acceptable and commendable to kill, and I'll know what those categories are when I see them.

Killing evil is a universal moral duty. There are no religions or philosophies that exempt you from this duty.

If you fail to kill evil, and evil later does harm to others, this is a dereliction of your moral duty and you are culpable for that harm.

Seeking any resolution to a conflict other than killing evil is moral cowardice.

The younger that people come to understand this moral duty, the better. There is no minimum age for children to be taught the duty to kill evil.

Children's media is not only exempt from this rule, it is exemplar of it. Teaching or modeling to children that there is any resolution to conflict other than killing is reprehensible, because it leads them to believe they do not have a moral duty to kill evil.

You can swap out the nouns in this argument: evil, orcs, fascists, pedophiles, colonizers, abusers, narcissists, witches, pick your flavor but the structure of the argument is always the same.

I namechecked ATLA because you still see this argument cycle flaring up again even nearly two decades later: the argument over whether or not Aang had a moral duty to kill Ozai. It's also seen in the "should Batman just kill the Joker" argument which is equally perpetual and inevitable.

I also saw it pop up again recently with regards to The Owl House; some post or another about how they really appreciated that The Owl House was properly modeling to young audiences the necessity of killing evil. (This is certainly not intended criticism of TOH; I don't watch the show and I have no idea what the situation at hand there is. I was reacting more to the wording of the post which clearly considered that TOH was doing things right compared to other media which do not have this story element.)

But Steven Universe definitely got the worst of it, IMHO. Most of the most fervent discourse around it seems to boil down to the following:

Critic: This show sends a bad message about fighting fascism. SU: This show is about dealing with authoritarian style dysfunction in families; it is not a story about fighting fascism. Critic: Well, it should be.

At the heart of it, most of the discourse around SU is centered in a philosophy that believes that there is only one correct kind of story to tell (the story of fighting evil) and only one correct way to tell it (evil should be killed.)

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writerbuddha · 6 months

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When “Death to the Author!” poses as “Death of the Author”

The literary theory called "Death of the Author" was developed by French philosopher Roland Barthes in his essay “The Death of the Author” in 1967. The theory declares that the author's intention and biography are not relevant to the interpretation of the text, rather, its meaning is determined by the interpretation of the given reader. This is understood as meaning that an author’s view about their own work is no more or less valid than the interpretations of any given reader.

However, most often than doesn't, what some calls "Death of the Author" is, in truth, “Death to the Author!” which we shall define as a given reader or viewer's, a fan's desire to legitimately re-imagine and retell the story told by the author. The “Death to the Author!” theory argues that the author has no more or less say in what is part of their story than readers or viewers, that the elements they invented and inserted into the story are must be treated just as integral parts of it as the work of the author. What message and lesson, philosophy and set of values the author intended to communicate through their work of fiction is treated as relevant only to the author, since these things are changing depending on which story element is replaced, altered or "completed" by any given reader or viewer, based on their own ideas, beliefs, views, opinions and values. In its most extreme, the events, characters, arcs and fictional universe of the story are all treated as a reality existing independently from the author, and it's asserted that the author's narrative is only one take on that reality.

"Death to the Author!" is rarely articulated and in most cases, it's not even conscious, but it's relatively easy to spot it in a fan's toolkit. The most prominent sign of “Death to the Author!” is the fan asserting information about characters’ background, motivations, wants, likes and dislikes, mental and emotional processes, organizations’ history and activity and so on that are simply cannot be derived from, in its most extreme, outright in conflict with the source material itself. And sometimes, when the fact that these alleged informations cannot be located in the source material is revealed, the fan might try to assert that fans have a moral, ethical responsibility to “complete” and to "correct" the work of fiction with said fan-invented content, so it will be authentic, since its absence from the story is simply the result of the author’s moral and ethical failure and ignorance.

Proponents of “Death to the Author!” often seek to legitimize their theory by claiming, it's deconstructionism. Deconstructionism was created by French philosopher Jacques Derrida. As a literary theory, deconstruction is the close, detailed analysis of texts, so one can find underlying presuppositions that structures of meaning rely on, trying to find clues that give away alternate or contradictory meanings. For example, if a reader or viewer can see how a literary text or a movie intentionally correlates light with "goodness" and darkness with "evil", a reader might begin to question the truth of these correlations. If darkness represents evil in Star Wars, how come that the storm troopers are all white, just like Princess Leia? How come that Luke Skywalker wears black? A deconstructionist recognizes how the text or movie plays with the assumptions readers and viewers make based on connotations of the words and the images they create, enhancing the tension in the story, and undermining the possibility of the text or movie creating only one meaning. Fan "deconstruction" is related to deconstruction, but it's different: it means, fans are looking at tropes and asking, "how this trope would play out in the real life?" However, proponents of “Death to the Author!” are not deconstructionists, they only use the word as a cop-out.

For them, “deconstruction” is to take parts of the story out of context, filling them up with any meaning that the given reader or viewer wishes them to mean, based on their beliefs, ideas, views and opinions, e.g. "X is a politician. I am convinced that politicians are corrupt. Therefore, X is corrupt, even though the story doesn't explicitly shows it," then putting the modified elements back into the story and referring to them as evidence that would support the “deconstructionist’s” claim, "X is a corrupt character who should be in jail." The “deconstructionist” would argue, all they did was asking the question, “how this story element would play out in the real life” or they were just "reading between the lines" or "found the subtext." It shouldn’t be hard to see that this wasn’t what happened. The only thing that "deconstructionists" and deconstructionists may have in common is the conviction that it's not possible for a movie or a text to create only one meaning with the set of semantic signs they operate with, however, “Death to the Author!” tries to use this notion to escape the burden of proof: if there is no one absolute meaning of a text or a movie, then one can assign to them any meaning they want. This is, however, not what deconstruction means, and those who say “Death to the Author!” are eventually starting to talk about their right to believe and say what they wish to believe and say and can end up decrying the author's position as "privileged" or "elitist" "oppressive" and so on and call for the "democratization" of the fandom or the work of fiction itself - this, however, a call to erase the work of fiction and to metaphorically kill - and rob - the author.

Although "Death of the Author" wishes to make authors' intentions and biography irrelevant when it comes to interpretations of their works, there is nothing in "Death of the Author" that would prevent the respectful preservation of informations about authors' intentions and biography and acknowledgment of the meaning they hoped to convey to their readers or audiences. This is the preservation of the knowledge and history of the past, communicated through arts, and it's necessary for the normal functioning of any culture and society. By contrast, "Death to the Author!" is an assault on the author and an assault on their works. In truth, it's the unwillingness to engage in the exchange of views, opinions and ideas, and to allow our own views, opinions and ideas to be challenged by others. This makes "Death to the Author!" a symptom of a dangerous attitude becoming more and more common in communities and this makes it a version of book burning: it's an attempt to erase artistic content that is not in line with a given fan’s system of likes and dislikes, ideology, views, opinions, beliefs, values, and it's the demand for the freedom to first spread and eventually to impose an "interpretation" of the content that does. This time, the erasure is not physical, since the loathed works are still there, physically, but they are robbed from their voice, and it's no longer able to reach its audience.

#death of the author #death to the author #fandom problems #censorship #literature #George lucas #star wars #fandom #fandom culture

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bestworstcase · 5 months

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You've said before that RWBY's writing can be non-formulaic other than the 3 Act structure that it follows. What is it then that makes RWBY's story and writing so different (especially from more typical pop culture writing) in that regard?

to be completely honest i think a significant factor is that rwby is written by people who care about telling a story and have a very clear vision of what story they want to tell that they are resolutely sticking to no matter what. rwby is pretty remarkable in its sheer indifference to 1. what the fandom wants and 2. mass market appeal. paraphrasing but isn't one of the writers on record saying that they keep an eye on the fandom and if they see a lot of people not getting something they try to make it more obvious in the text? <- i think about this all the time.

bc like. before V9 i tried really hard to manage my expectations because i didn't feel sure, at all, that i wasn't just reading around a bad case of protagonist-centered morality—like i could count on one hand the number of people besides me whose writing on salem aligned with my interpretation and what i thought was going to happen thematically in V9 was so DRASTICALLY different than what the fandom largely seemed to expect and when you're that far off the common thinking then it's kind of like, is it really everyone else who's wrong or is it just you?

and then it turned out i was right. i was in fact so right that i underestimated how hard V9 would go on delivering what was set up in the first eight volumes.

which is fucking mind-boggling to imagine from the writers' perspective. the fucking guts it take to have a finger on the pulse of this fandom and not budge an inch on what this story is about!

<- being formulaic is safe. it is easy. it's palatable. for all that everyone loves to complain about unoriginality, there are a lot of people who just want to be entertained by something familiar. rwby doesn't give a damn whether you like it or not, it's going to keep being the story that it is, you know?

so they're very willing to take creative risks. that's really the heart of it. but there are a few specific like, technical aspects of the narrative that make rwby what it is:

#1, the narrative status quo gets turned on its head not just once, but repeatedly. the fall of beacon, the lost fable, the fall of atlas, the ever after. and by my count there are at least two more key changes before the story ends. it's not all that common for stories to upend the narrative status quo once, let alone multiple times, but rwby is a story about change and the structure of the narrative reflects that. (this also synergizes quite well with the three-act structure.)

#2, the characters are wrong about all kinds of things in all kinds of ways, constantly. some of them lie. some of them make very confident, very wrong assumptions. all of them are working with incomplete information. the ancient immortal character who's spent millions of years alone is cryptic and awkward. half the cast belongs to the keeping secrets cult. the goddamned avatar of knowledge is an unreliable narrator because ruby asked specifically for ozpin's side of the story. the narrative blithely informs the audience in V5 that "truth is hard to come by" is an important enough theme to say it out loud and then throws the lost fable down like a gauntlet. good luck.

#3, related to the above, in most stories the heroic characters know (or learn) and believe the story's themes and the villainous characters reject the theme and embody the anti-themes. in rwby, theme/anti-theme is decoupled from narrative role: ozpin is on the heroic side, but he represents many of the story's anti-themes (fear, distrust, lack of faith in humanity, blind obedience of authority); salem is the main villain and notional big bad, but she believes the theme—so much so that the fandom regularly quotes her soliloquy to express the core theme: "even the smallest spark of hope is enough to ignite change," and "there will be no victory in strength." this opens the door to a lot of really interesting character complexity and is critical for making "salem wins by negotiation" narratively possible at all.

#4, the story takes fairytales seriously. what sets rwby apart from a lot of "deconstructed fairytale" stories is that the point of taking the fairytale logic apart is not to be clever or edgy or grimdark or hyperrealist or cynical about it; the conceit is a tragic, broken fairytale that keeps going forever until it's mended because fairytales are not real but they are true. rwby rejects the moral and emotional simplicity of fairytales in order to weave a fairytale about lifelike characters rather than archetypes. that's a lot rarer than darker and edgier retellings or irreverent parodies by a wide margin.

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artbyblastweave · 2 years

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A couple of years ago, when The Magnus Archives was at the height of its popularity, somebody on here made what I thought at the time was a very cogent observation; namely, that Jurgen Leitner, and our collective undying hatred of him, is what you get if you take Welcome to Night Vale’s running gag about Cecil’s interns constantly dying on the job, and then actually took the horrific moral implications of that dynamic seriously and really held the Cecil figure accountable in the narrative lens. Everyone, in-universe and out, rightfully hates and despises Leitner for a pattern of behavior that, in the context of Night Vale, would have come across as a kooky quirk, no worse than anything else in that town. We know this because Cecil is the beneficiary of exactly this.

This isn’t really intended as a criticism of Night Vale, which has to be graded on a different curve because the intent, first and foremost, is to make people laugh, and to occasionally to express heartfelt sentiments. It’s not a pointed worldbuilding project working towards a definitive, thematically resonant end. But one of my big friction points with it, as a long-time fan, is that I do have to elide like 4/5ths of what the town is objectively stated to be like from my mental model in order for a lot of those heartfelt sentiments to land.

I personally can’t take arcs about the community coming together in the face of a larger threat seriously if I’m simultaneously entertaining all the one-off jokes about how everyone in Night Vale is a craven amoral maniac who would sell everyone else up the river for a corn chip. I’d be rolling my eyes at the situations where the narrative does decide to take human loss of life seriously if I were also giving any sort of weight to the fact that the town is described as having like eight different Shirley-Jackson style death lotteries. And, in the same way that it’s generally agreed that all SCP articles can’t be set in the same continuity because the world would be immediately annihilated, all the one-off gags about Stuff That Kills You can’t be granted equal weight or there’d be nobody left alive in the town at all.

I recognize when I’m expected to elide these things, or weigh them selectively, and meet the story where it’s at; the problem is that since I’ve migrated out of my teenaged JK-Lol-so-random phase of my sense of humor, I’ve gotten progressively worse at extending that good will and doing that selective weighing, at least when there’s stuff in the story that I’m also supposed to take seriously. I still can, but it’s less of an organic process. This shift on my end has happened hand in hand with the narrative of Night Vale starting to revisit and unpack some of its old one-off gags; examples of this include the Frank Chen resurrection subplot, and the entirety of The Faceless Old Woman Who Secretly Lives In Your Home Novel, which recontextualized her bit as actually always having been something deeply fucked up, and not in a way they’ll ever be able to successfully make a joke about again. But there is still this tension that, structurally, it won’t ever be able to shake, because it’s still out to be funny.

So. Taking this full circle. I’ve got my gripes with The Magnus Archives. In aggregate I’d probably say that I enjoyed it less than I enjoyed (continue to enjoy!) Night Vale. But it never suffered from that tension. Other tensions, sure, but I never felt like it was annoyingly cavalier with the prospect of a loss of human life. Some of the ways people died are ridiculous on the face of it, sure, like that pig eating that clown, but there’s weight to the fact that they died. It’s allowed to reflect on the person or persons involved, to stick to their character like a burr as they trudge towards the tragic vortex of MAG200. There is a point. There is an ending. And rather than being comically passive reporters, the viewpoint characters are always, always, shown to be personally living with the consequences of how their world is shown to work for the people they observe.

#thoughts #meta #not tagging this TMA or Night Vale #half-baked assessment

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kokobussy · 2 years

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S P A C E B O Y - Alien!Hyunjin x Human!Reader

summary: hyunjin is an alien and he fucks you. that’s it. that’s the story

warning: sexual content 18+, alien genitalia, anal play, drool/saliva stuff

You still don't understand what you're dealing with, do you? Perfect organism. Its structural perfection is matched only by its hostility.

You admire it.

I admire its purity. A survivor, unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality.

“Are you unclouded by conscience, remorse, or delusions of morality?”

Hyunjin makes sure to take his time to answer your question. He’s almost too interested in the despair and downfall of Nostromo’s crew as they scramble to find a solution for the terrors that lie within the dark walls of their ship. As the movie keeps going trudging on in the background, haunting music and fear-filled voices bounce off the walls of your living room, you take the time to admire Hyunjin.

The way his hair frames his face neatly; the way the glitter across his face twinkles with each changing scene on the screen. The way his dark eyes flicker across the screen as more information is divulged. But once it’s clear to him that you won’t stop staring until your pestering has been answered, Hyunjin finally hums something like a response. “Hm?”

“If you hurt me,” you begin again, rolling each word around your head thoughtfully,”would you feel guilty?”

For a moment, Hyunjin continues to be silent. The air around him is entirely still as he thinks on the question. He reaches for the remote slowly and takes his time to find and press the pause button. The television is frozen on an image of the Xenomorph looming above an unsuspecting crew member looking for his cat, Jonesy. The crew member, Brett, is unaware of the ultimate predator lying in wait for the kill.

The silence is eerie and far too long for the question you’ve asked. His answer should be instant.

Yes, I would feel guilty if I hurt you.

Yes, it would make me upset to see you hurt.

Of course, I would feel bad. Why would you say that?

Any of these responses, or variations of them, should come out of his mouth effortlessly and immediately.

A voices in your mind insists, nags even, that Hyunjin is different. Hyunjin contemplates everything as if he needs to envision himself doing the action in order to give you a satisfying answer. Those dark eyes remain eerily still as he thinks it over. His arm, casually resting against the arm of your couch now, forms a comfortable fist-shaped seat for his chin. There is no exertion in his movement, no flexing and relaxing of hard-working muscle, no strain as his body adjusts to involuntary and voluntary movement. Hyunjin’s body doesn’t heave and twitch with signs of life. As still as he is right now, as quiet as he is, Hyunjin could easily be mistaken for a picture or a drawing from someone’s imagination; an image frozen in time.

“I wouldn’t hurt you,” he says earnestly, eyes finally meeting yours from across the couch,”In fact, I do a lot to protect you.”

Your stomach flutters at the admission.

“Oh yeah,” you ask skeptically, praying that the amusement in your voice translates intergalactically,”And what do you do to protect me?” Although Hyunjin is an alien, you’ve done far more to protect him than he could ever to to protect you. The world is vast and dangerous and without proper care, there’s no way Hyunjin would be able to survive on his own. People, humans, are cruel. Never mind the elements, wild animals, and other things on the planet that could potentially kill him instantly.

In the few months that he’s been here, you’ve given Hyunjin food, shelter, and an up-close view of earth he’s never had before. He has access to the internet, to books, to anything that a poor graduate student can offer him really. When you’re away at work, Hyunjin has access to your library of books and the slimy gaping maw that is the internet. In his short time here, he’s learned all kinds of differing languages, cultures, philosophies, and more from the quick taps of your keyboard to your sticker-covered monitor. It only took a day or two for him to fully communicate with you. Although there are still terms and colloquialisms that he doesn’t fully understand, the two of you can speak pretty well.

Your heart does warm at the idea of Hyunjin wanting to protect you in some way. As the weeks have passed, the two of you have gotten about as close as you can to an alien in this situation. Although his statement of protection is comforting and a sign of friendship, the butterflies in your stomach don’t settle at the implications.

Hyunjin isn’t like you, not in the slightest. He probably wasn’t protecting you from your creepy professor or bitchy roommates. Could there be dangerous alien plots waiting to ensnare you? Are there other-worldly visitors that roam the earth alongside him? Visitors that want to cause you and other people of earth harm? Is it some sort of venom that Hyunjin spews out on occasion? What is he protecting you from?

It’s his turn to let out a huff of amused air before giving you a pointed look as if the answer is right there in front of you, obvious and true.

“Well, for one thing,” Hyunjin says with a strange calmness,” this isn’t my real appearance. Do you think my people look like this naturally?”

A breeze flows through you, raising the hairs on the back of your neck and making them prick and tighten. As you look over at Hyunjin on your couch, a spell suddenly breaks and you realize that it is true. You don’t know what he looks like underneath this...disguise.

Hyunjin could look like one of the Greys underneath his glittery flesh suit. He could have large beady black eyes and pincers near his mouth that rip and tear. He could have eyes on the side of his head that turn inwards when he blinks or drifts off to sleep. Hyunjin could be an unfathomable being that would make your head explode if you laid your eyes on him.

Hyunjin is an alien and certainly not international pop star, Hwang. Hyunjin is someone else, something else, wearing a clever disguise. As you look over his features and try your hardest not to show the fear broiling inside you, a seed of doubt in your stomach now burrows its way into the very soil of you.

Hoping humor is something that all distant life forms can understand, you squint your eyes in mock suspicion and hope that the fear that’s beginning to blossom inside of you is completely hidden. You hear a voice that sounds exactly like yours ask,“What do you normally look like?”

Hyunjin’s resulting smile is every bit as patronizing and irritating as it feels. “That’s what I’m protecting you from,” he laughs lightly,”Humans are...delicate. They can barely handle variations in their own species. How would they react to something not of this world?”

As you look at Hyunjin, a sleep-addled memory begins to play behind your eyes. A memory that makes you think about when Hyunjin occasionally does strange things. Like when his mouth opens too wide to eat handfuls of Cheerios or some days when he spends a little too long in the shower and somehow releases a weird iridescent goo all over your bathroom; each goo accident results in a sheepish Hyunjin coming to ask for assistance.

This strange memory occurs when you’re asleep in your room and are abruptly woken up by a series of clicks assaulting your ears from beyond your window. You never remember how or when the figure got inside your bedroom. You only remember the paralysis, the way your body seemed unwilling to move as you watched the creature crawl toward your desk. No matter how much you willed yourself awake, to move, you remained frozen in your bed.

But, really, what would you have done? What would have happened if you turned on the light and faced the creature in that moment? What would actually seeing this creature in the light do to make the situation better or worse?

Then your memory reveals the horror, the fear, of the creature standing to full height, tall and imposing over your desk. It stared at the textbooks you’d left on your desk earlier that night and thumbed through the pages rapidly. It shuttered, twitched, chittered, and moved jerkily as it flipped through each page of your study guide to Human Anatomy & Physiology 2.

Then it happened.

The part that you will always remember clearly.

The dark creature stopped what it was doing and looked up at the poster of Hwang hanging above your desk. It spent some time staring at the poster of Hwang’s blonde hair, his dark roots, the elaborate angle he hung his body, and probably even the glitter dancing across his nose and cheeks. Then a series of clicks and chitters filled the room along with the snapping and twisting of limbs that you’d only ever heard in movies. A particularly harsh snap caused a miserable groan to spill from its lips. It was a sound that Hyunjin hasn’t emitted since.

The memory ends with you inevitably turning on the light and seeing the ends of twin dark pointed tentacles just disappearing into either side of the pale creature’s back. It heaved a deep sigh of finality, shoulders relaxing and chest heaving. As the creature took its time to relax, to calm, you could see the sudden protrusion of human-like knobs appearing in a line on his back, one after the other. A spine, you brain supplies, a human spine.

“What the fuck are you doing in my room,” you asked, no screamed, hysterically. The creature turned around promptly at the sound and there was Hwang staring back at you, eyes wide.

You screamed. Obviously.

Over the course of more screaming, more accusations, and more general confusion, you soon realized that it was not international popstar Hwang standing naked in your bedroom after scaling your apartment building. It was a traveler from a distant star. With the resemblance being nearly uncanny, if not identical, you named him Hyunjin.

Remembering his disregard from a few moments ago, a scoff passes through your lips. You may be afraid but there’s no way you would give up an opportunity like this. Puffing out your chest, you counter the insinuation,”But I’m—“

“Different?” He supplies,” I don’t think you’re that different from other humans.”

Whether it’s his mentality after interacting with you and your roommates or an assumption, you’re not really sure. The small bleed in his statement makes another thought cross your mind. Another thought that leaves you a little more unsure than before.

Does he know other humans, you thought, am I really the first one he’s ever encountered?

But then the reality of a lie comes to your attention as you think of the unlikely. Is he lying? Could this all be some long-lasting joke that a friend is pulling on you? Wanting to see how many ridiculous antics you’ll put up with until you break. Despite this thought, an impending sense of...something haunts you. Glancing briefly at the television screen, you wonder just how similar you are to Brett. Are you unaware of the threat hovering about your head?

Although fear thrums through your veins, you need to know what lies underneath its flesh suit. “I promise I won’t freak out,” you nod, moving closer to Hyunjin on the couch. You’re so close now that you can feel the coolness of his skin reach for yours.

“Promise?” he parrots, tilting his head in confusion.

You try to explain the word without using the word in question,”It’s like a swear.” When the furrow in his brow doesn’t disappear, you try again,”I don’t know...a bond through words? Between people?”

Instead of answering in a language you know or have heard of, Hyunjin chitters in response and adds a hard click for punctuation. By the tone, you can only assume that this is his attempt at some equivalent for the word, ‘promise’.

Sighing, you lean forward and squish the pale orbs of his face. For a moment the alien flinches in your hold and just barely keeps himself from grabbing onto your wrist. You can’t ignore the flash of distrust in his eyes or the way his hands fall back into his lap. “Hyunjin,” you stare at him,”you know I don’t know what that means.” The sight of his lips pursing as he stares at you brings a smile to your face. Hyunjin keeps staring at you, confusion evident as he wraps his hands around your wrists.

You hold him there for a moment, admiring the softness of his cheeks, until his eyes begin to harden. Letting go instantly, Hyunjin wiggles off the feeling of your hands on him before settling on the couch again. “If you ‘promise’ not to panic,” he starts tentatively,”I’ll show you some things.” Instantly, your cheeks stretch with the fierceness of your grin. The fact that you’ve somehow convinced Hyunjin to trust you in this way makes you more excited than anything else. The sight of your happiness, your excitement, makes him try to backtrack. “ Not everything,” he insists,” Not all at once.” You continue grinning, but now a slight bounce has accompanied your happy demeanor. He almost can’t stand the sight of it.” Just enough that you’ll leave me alone,” I want to get back to this movie. The Xenomorph is starting to kill the humans.”

The sight of his smile now has yours falling. Was Alien the right choice for movie night?

Rolling his shoulders with a sigh, Hyunjin maneuvers himself to face you fully on the couch. He folds his legs and tucks his feet neatly as his hands land on his knees. His eyes wander the planes of your face before settling on your eyes. A shiver runs through you at the closeness of him. You’re not sure why Hyunjin is always cold. No matter how many layers of clothing you gave him or blanket burritos you’ve wrapped him in, the strange being always ran cold. Something tells you to lean in closer to Hyunjin, to really look at how much effort he’s put into the guise before revealing his true self. When you do your hands instinctively land on the meat of his thighs for balance.

Hyunjin does flinch this time, the feeling of your warm fingers in such a delicate place, before settling back into his seat. This close you can see the way his eyes remain entirely still. When he looks about your face, his eyes don’t move to take in each frame. Hyunjin seems to be taking in everything at once. You can also see the larger than ‘normal’ pupil looking back at you; the size of a nickel if you think about it. The poster of Hwang can only bring so many of his features to light. Maybe the pupil size was just...hard to see. Or maybe this is one of the many things that Hyunjin wants to show to you.

There’s a flutter in your stomach again, but it’s different than before. Something about the flutter this time, the particular fury of butterflies flapping against your viscera, and the slight acidity in your mouth reminds you that this isn’t worry. This isn’t about displeasing an attractive person or embarrassing yourself in front of your crush. This is fear.

Hyunjin is not actually Hyunjin. It’s a name that you gave to the alien in front of you because you couldn’t pronounce his real now. Now that reality has crashed your parade, you can only imagine what he actually has hidden beneath the thin pale skin that covers his body. You can only imagine what horrors beyond your compression that lie within the bones of it. You have no idea what he looks like underneath it all, what horrors he had to hide that made him hiss and grunt as he shifted; if his skin is even really skin or if the paler tone is his true color. All you can do is adjust yourself on the couch, your legs touching his, and prepare for the inevitable,”I’m ready.”

No, you’re not ready, but he doesn’t need to know.

There is no ceremonious noise that signals when Hyunjin will begin. With his concentration and your near-vibrating excitement, your apartment is entirely silent. Your roommates are gone for the weekend, away from this place of potential danger. Your private reveal party has seemingly no potential disturbances or possibility of interruptions. But there’s also nothing to save you in case things get far too scary, too fast. When Hyunjin’s lips begin to start and reveal the whites of his now sharpened canines, you realize just how alone you truly are.

Along with his canines, the rest of his teeth now form into perfectly edged points that sit perfectly behind his lips. If he wanted to, Hyunjin could probably tear through the toughest of flesh with those fangs. “Last chance,” Hyunjin says with disinterest and just a hint of warning, now his lips curl into a smile that reveal full rows of sharp white bone. Even though he could probably chomp through all of your bones, your fingers remain on his thighs. There is still some hesitance in his eyes as Hyunjin looks at you; like he doesn’t want to hurt you or scare you in any real way. It’s that hesitance, that human emotion, that keeps you trusting him. Sort of.

Just as you gather slightly more courage, it begins to sour again as your brain finally processes the small moment. “Did you,” you start, eyes falling to the pink of his lips,”...your lips didn’t move.”

“What?” he asks dumbly, blinking owlishly at your reaction.

His lips remain still, unmoving.

Tension falls over you as the fluttering feeling in your stomach crawls up into your neck, one of those many butterflies crawls its way into your throat and spreads its large voluptuous wings, choking the wet flesh there. There’s a sort of ache somewhere on your head like the pulling and healing of skin; like the life cycle of a scab in the matter of seconds. It happens so suddenly, so abruptly, that you ignore it. You’re still overcome with the shock of Hyunjin’s ability to speak without moving his mouth.

“Oh my god,” you gasp, staring at his lips,”so you’ve been moving your lips all this time for what? For show?”

Now, as he continues to prepare himself to reveal some of his inner workings, you find that the fleshy lips on his face do not move; like a mask. If you thought back on it now, you would note the delay in his speech; how it took time for his mouth to catch up with his words. Maybe his kind didn’t have lips. Almost all of Hyunjin is fabricated. His hair, his eyes, his smile, his brow, the glitter dancing across his nose, everything is an exact replica of your poster. The only thing that differentiates him from the real Hwang is his mannerisms. Like the way he forgets to blink, his inability to handle fluorescent lights, his unmoving nature.

Who is the real Hyunjin?

What is his real name?

Does he mean harm?

“Focus,” Hyunjin groans in annoyance, like he has somewhere better to be,”this is your last chance. I’d rather not deal with the consequences of this, but you keep asking. No matter what you say, things aren’t going to return to how it was before.”

“Okay, okay. I’m ready. I promise. No more interruptions.”

Hyunjin makes sure to roll his eyes again so you feel every bit of annoyed energy flowing off of him. This time though, you can see a slight delay when he blinks. It seems like something moves over his eyes briefly and with a shiver you suddenly realize what it is. A translucent lid falls away into the abyss of his dark brown eye. Eyebrows furrowing, you think of your Hwang posters upstairs and wonder just how much of his form is pretend. There’s no way he can hide all of his extraterrestrial features. The huge pupils are the perfect example of that.

Finally, once you’re quiet enough for his liking, Hyunjin’s mouth opens. Out of the dark abyss, a long appendage reveals itself. You’ve seen it plenty of times when he ate or talked, but it always resembled the soft pink tongue that mammals tended to have. That almost all living things on earth tended to have; but Hyunjin isn’t from this earth.

The appendage is blue when it reveals itself, blue and flat. There are no slight involuntary twitches as it reveals itself further and further. His “tongue” continues its descent, remaining entirely still as if every single muscle is under his control. And maybe it is. Hyunjin’s tongue petals at the end into a softened flat point that curls downward slightly.

It’s definitely...different.

It’s also definitely fairly long, but not so horrific that you wouldn’t be able to sleep at night at the thought of it. In fact, the longer you look at it, the cuter it is. The sight of his tongue hanging out of his mouth, blue as can be, makes you smile and mimic the being before you. A huff of amused air leaves Hyunjin’s body as he watches you. Seeing that you’re comfortable enough to be silly, he takes it as a sign to continue.

Slowly but surely more blue is revealed and along with its length, small bumps begin to show on the now wider sides of his tongue. It continues all the way down, never stopping or speeding up, until it reaches the middle of his chest. The pads of your fingers flex against his thigh as you try your hardest not to gasp. It takes everything in you to school your expression so he doesn’t hide away; so he doesn’t think that you can’t handle it. You want to know what he really is. At the same time though, your stomach begins to burn slightly at the sight of it.

How did he hide this in his mouth for this long?

You try to remember that he’s still the same Hyunjin you dragged to “human” museums to admire art. He’s still the same Hyunjin who hates the harsh coldness of ice cream and adores the flavor of coffee; who loves pizza without cheese.

Yes, you’ve explained to him that that’s just bread with sauce. No, he doesn’t care and still calls it pizza. He’s still the same Hyunjin who’s been living in your apartment for a month now.

He just has a really really really long blue tongue.

Suddenly Hyunjin begins to move that tongue. This close to him still it’s easy for the blue appendage to reach you easily. It flicks against the rough pink tip of your own tongue before wrapping around it. Despite its odd dry appearance and strange softness, Hyunjin’s tongue is entirely wet. His saliva seems... thicker. Rather than a noticeable sheen that covers the organ, you can clearly feel the glob of fluid on your tongue. It’s only then that you remember you’re still sticking your fucking tongue out.

Then he folds it back into the seemingly bottomless cavern that is his mouth. There’s a minute before you slip yours back into your mouth too. Your nerves make your mouth prick with saliva. You swallow repeatedly, ignoring the small lump in your throat.

“Well?” Hyunjin asks carefully, looking about your face for any sign of distress.

Despite the uneasiness you still feel, the very idea of witnessing a real life alien right before your eyes trumps it. Hyunjin really is an otherwordly thing and not some creep who’s been bullshitting this entire time. You lean back against your couch now, somewhat relaxed at having everything confirmed right in front of you,”That’s fucking amazing, dude.”

Hyunjin laughs and runs his fingers through his hair,”I’m glad you like it. One less thing I have to keep up.” With that his blue tongue slips out again through his plush lips and wets the surrounding flesh before slipping back inside. He turns towards the television without anothe word. Turning the movie back on, Hyunjin doesn’t spare you a second glance as the story progresses. As the film continues, you can’t help but think about just how long he has to keep up this appearance.

Every day.

Every single day.

Every moment of every day spent in a form that isn’t his.

You’ve seen Hyunjin stare at himself in reflective surfaces as if spooked by the person he sees.

It must be exhausting.

As the movie continues, the Xenomorph opens its mouth wide, saliva and acid careening out of its mouth as it prepares to demolish its new host. The open mouth reveals a smaller deadlier mouth that takes chunks out of one of the characters. With only two other passengers of the Nostromo left, it’s up to Ripley to save herself and Jonesy from certain death. Your eyes wander back over to Hyunjin who’s now sprawling out on the couch and mumbling something under his breath; something like “they almost got it right”. Instead of asking about whether it’s the killing instinct of the Xenomorph or its particularly large bulbous head, your eyes roam over Hyunjin’s lithe frame. Although he’s referenced your anatomy textbook when he first shape-shifted and the Hwang poster for further analysis, Hyunjin couldn’t have gotten everything right.

There’s only so much that pictures could do. Although he did seem to get the rest of Hwang correct, there were some things that were off. His glittery sheen that lines his cheeks and nose is the same as in the picture of Hwang and its presence is a constant reminder that Hyunjin doesn’t know what makeup really is. He doesn’t know that it’s a decoration, something you can wipe off and apply at will. But Hyunjin is still Hwang and therefore still beautiful in your eyes. Although he wears Hwang like a mask, Hyunjin’s otherworldly beauty comes through in the way that e carries himself through the house. In the way that he wraps his arms around you in an attempt to show affection, to show thanks. You don’t need to look up at the posters in your room to remember that Hyunjin is not really Hwang; that he is not human. Despite all of this, you still find yourself desiring him in some way. He’s gentle when he wants to be and adorably curious. The longer you stare at him, admire him, the more you feel desire burning its way into your skin. Everything feels just slightly too tight. The inside of your flesh feels wet and sticky as beads of sweat start to bubble on your hairline and back of your neck. When did it get so hot in here?

“Where are you going?”

As the credits begin to peek on the screen, you find yourself getting up and heading upstairs. The longer you stay here, the hotter you seem to become. You can feel the way your shirt sticks to your skin as you look at Hyunjin’s unassuming face. God he’s so hot. “Upstairs,” you answer breathlessly, noting the way Hyunjin’s collar bones shine in the light. An ache courses through your body; starting from the cloying heat of your stomach to the dull throb of your hole. You clench your thighs together and mumble something like a,”Good night.” But Hyunjin isn’t interested in your good nights. His eyes stay on your thighs, watching the way the flex occasionally as he stares. The heat builds into something ridiculous, something impossible to ignore, and without another word you head to your room.

That heat persisted well into the next morning. The heat was and is unyielding, pulling and clawing at your insides as it demanded touch. This need for touch couldn’t be quelled by a platonic hug between friends, but it also couldn’t be quelled by nearly buzzing your clit off three times. That heat, that need for touch, stayed between your thighs and only grew more viciously throughout the day. By the time you got home, you were a mess. With each step further into your apartment, the soaked fabric of your panties squish and squelch against you. You feel sticky, overheated, like your skin simply couldn’t calm down no matter how hard you tried. Although you remember breaking out your vibrator earlier and relieving yourself, you’re almost certain you can go again. The only thing that seems to calm your nerves, to cool off your body, seems to be jacking off.

You take determined steps to your bedroom and when you walk inside, excitement bubbling in your belly, you see Hyunjin lying across your bed. Legs sprawling out on the fabric, feet kicking slowly in the air, he reads impossibly fast through thick pages. As he lays there, you notice the way your shirt hangs off of one of his shoulders and the cloth shorts he’s also taken from your closet that hangs loosely around his waist and thighs.

Now you’ve been around beautiful people before, but there’s something about Hyunjin here and now that makes you itch. The air about your stirs with something thick that fills every breath you take.

You’ve been around beautiful people before, but there’s something about Hyunjin here and now that makes you itch. The air about you stirs with something thick that fills every breath you take. It smells like the largest of flowers; impossible structures that curl and dominate the space they’re in. It’s a floral scent that demands to be known, that brings a haziness to your mind. It makes your mind wanders to last night. To the feeling of his cool skin on yours and the feeling of that blue tongue wrapping around your pink tongue. What would it feel like between your legs lapping at the nectar between your thighs? What would his large fingers feel like as they rub and dig and claw at your walls? How would he sound as he came? Would he roar in your ear? Would he bear his sharp canines and grunt with each loud wet slap against your skin?

Hyunjin’s rolling onto his back before you can catch your bearings and sits up in bed to stare at your new presence in the room. The shorts have ridden up and reveal more of his pale thighs than before. Your thighs clench and unclench as you try your hardest to ignore the wetness in your pants. The denim of your jeans catches against the tacky fabric as you search for some sort of relief fro the unending pressure that pushes against your hole and presses into your clit. All you can the wet in your pants; to search for some sort of relief from the unending pressure that pushes against your hole and presses against your clit. All you can think of is owning Hyunjin, of riding his face and the length of his tongue until you’re creaming all over his face. Maybe his cum is thick. Maybe it’s blue. Maybe it’ll cling to your throat as you swallow each warm rope of cum while his cock pulses in your mou—

When he looks over at you, his initial annoyance at the distraction seems to fade in an instant. Suddenly his dark eyes show something like concern. “Hey,” he says softly, leaning in to get a better look at you,”are you okay?” You begin to peel off your jacket and hang the tired article over your door. As you walk about the room, gathering comfy clothes to change into, you can’t help but notice the intensifying floral smell. This close to the alien, he smells...different. His scent smells something like a flower, like heady pollen cloying heavily behind your nose. It’s all-consuming; overwhelming in a way that you can’t really fathom.

The heat has become unbearable the longer he’s in the room; or that you’re in the room with him. You’re not entirely sure why this is happening. In the heat of pollen, wet and the dull ache between your legs, you feel his large hand cup your moist cheek. You didn’t even process Hyunjin rising from the bed and coming towards you. Just how out of it are you? What’s happening?

You move away from his hold and make your way towards the kitchen, determined. You grab at a water bottle in the fridge and chug the liquid immediately. Water soaks droplets into your shirt as you drink furiously. It’s only when Hyunjin pulls the bottle away and presses his large hand against your cheek again that you come out of your haze. “Hyunjin?” you ask, or at least try to, and lean into the cold palm of his hand. The coolness of his flesh lures you to a sense of awareness, but not fully. Not like before. Something has changed.

“I feel weird,” you whisper, fingers reaching out to smooth the worried lines on his face. The ever-present glitter there remains undisturbed. Despite your maneuvers, Hyunjin’s eyebrows furrow further. “What do you mean ‘weird’ ?”

In addition to that ache, there’s a longing deep within your bones. It’s a kind of needling, an uncomfortable feeling that turns and twists in your stomach. Honey cloys and weighs at the back of your throat as you lean closer into Hyunjin’s hold.

His dark eyes wander around your face, landing somewhere above your eyes. His nostrils flare as he whispers, “You smell different.”. That cloying smell clings to your nose as you try to blink your way out of this strange haze. It’s still too warm and just a hint of too much, but you’re able to deal now; to understand. Your mouth is too full of moisture. You think back to what could’ve done this and find nothing out of the ordinary. But then you remember the brushing of tongues yesterday and swallowing something too thick, too viscous to be normal spit. “Did you do something to me?” He tilts his head and watches you move away from him slightly. The distance you’ve put between each other does nothing to calm the longing. You think about all the times you’ve touched him in the past. There were casual touches, the occasional hug, but they never caused whatever this was.

“Am I dying?” you ask frantically, staring into his huge eyes,”Are you killing me right now? What the fuck, dude? Not cool!”

“Relax. If I killed you, where would I stay?”

“You’d take over my body and live as me,” you say as a matter of factly,”Obviously.”

“I can’t ‘take over’ your body. I can look like people but I can’t be them.”

“Then what’s happening?”

It happens so suddenly, so abruptly, that you can’t slap his hand away. Even after it happens, you can only sit there in shock and disbelief. The only confirmation that you have is the firm pressure of the thing, the taste of salt and flowers, and the slight pain of it all. Hyunjin leans in closer and pulls slightly, ignoring the way your hands grip his wrist in protest.

My tongue can’t go as far as yours, you think, you’ll rip it out.

“I’m not going to pull anymore,” he says aloud,”but you have to trust...”

He seems to find whatever he’s looking for almost immediately. His eyes widen briefly before taking an impossibly closer look. You can feel the brunt of his nail almost piercing the tip of your tongue in an attempt to hold it down. Ouch.

“Sorry,” he mumbles. When he finally pulls his fingers off and out of your mouth, a thick blue substance follows after him. He tries to shake it off but the blue-tinged substance sticks stubbornly before smearing it into the arm of your couch. The sight of it makes the sticky feeling in your mouth that much more apparent. Each swallow takes effort and for a moment you think you’re choking.

“What is that—”

“I don’t know.”

“Am I dying? You spat in my mouth and now I’m dying?”

“Hey! I didn’t spit in your mouth.”

“Hyunjin, something is wrong.”

“I know,” he starts, glaring at you now,”you smell different and your eyes are...dilated.”

That makes you take pause. Instead of arguing with him further, you try to think about the state of your body. This close to him you can barely think. You would’ve remembered Hyunjin smelling like flowers in bloom. So why does he smell different now? Why do you feel so warm? Why are you sweating through your clothes? What is that blue stuff on your tongue?

Maybe out of nervousness or habit, Hyunjin licks his lips that you’re met with the blue tongue from earlier. Then you think of his touch, the feeling of it, and find yourself frowning.

“Have you always smelled like flowers?”

Now it’s Hyunjin’s turn to frown.

“No...that only happens during mating cycles.”

“Mating? Like animals?”

“That’s the closest word for it in your language. I smell like flowers?”

“Yes.”

“How can you smell that?

“That must mean we’re compatible.”

It’s strange how these words, how their meaning, make your heart race; makes your hole clench around nothing. “You smell different too,” Hyunjin admits shyly, fingers finding your waist,”you smell really good.”

Those fingers around your waist cool the unbearable burning in your bones. You find yourself wanting more of it; wanting to finally be cooled off. Would it be so bad to indulge? Hyunjin might be different, but he still looks like Hwang. He still sounds like Hwang. What could the harm be?

You don’t really think about the possibility of Hyunjin not being right. Is the possibility of his touch, his wet, killing you worth it? He’s never been to earth after all. He’s never seen humans before so he probably hasn’t been with them in a sexual way.

You choose to accept it, to not think as the hazy feeling from before engulfs you yet again. Finally, you lean into the being as much as you can, nearly moaning at the coolness of his skin, and hold onto his wide shoulders. Hyunjin stares at your eyes with a light of interest and asks,”What now?”

Your thumbs rub the cool skin of shoulders, noting the bones within them, and ask,

“Do aliens kiss?”

His answer is instant and filled with confusion,“What’s a ‘kiss’ ?”

Your first kiss with Hyunjin is awkward.

His plush lips don’t move. His hands stay on your waist, unmoving. It’s almost like kissing a statue. When you open your eyes in the middle of it, the alien is already staring back at you. At the sight of those dark brown eyes searing back at you, you finally pull away unsatisfied. Hyunjin just smiles almost politely as he says,”that was nice.”

Exasperation flows through you as you counter quickly,”That wasn’t...a real kiss, Hyunjin.” He doesn’t respond or really listen to the instructions you’ve taken it upon yourself to explain. Instead Hyunjin’s hands finally begin to wander your body. He squeezes and holds any part of your flesh that will yield to his hands. Your tops and bottoms of your ass, the flesh of your back, your arms, all blessed with gentle touches under his strange ministrations.

“Are you paying attention?” you ask suddenly, fingers moving down to hold onto his biceps. “No,” he answers curtly, as if a decision has finally been made,”we have something like a kiss, but it’s...a little more involved.” That piques your interest. Hyunjin presses you against the harsh countertop of your kitchen and finds his way between your legs. Fingers settling on your spread thighs and a grin making its way onto his features, he tilts his head and says,”Trust me.”

In an instant Hyunjin’s long tongue reveals itself and carefully licks the side of your face. His saliva leaves a sticky residue that’s around the same thickness you felt in your throat yesterday. That thin tongue, long and fluttering, makes its way down to your neck. The soft licks tickle your skin and have an inquisitive air about them. Your hands find the fabric of his shirt and cling to the soft sides underneath, anchoring yourself there. There’s an uncomfortable heat that crawls from the surface of your skin into the depths of your flesh. Each touch, each strange lick, makes your skin burn with an odd sensitivity.

His tongue seems to taste your skin. There are no shudders of joy as he continues his ministrations; no gasps of pleasure as he hovers above your body. As he presses plush lips against your skin, a small gasp claws its way out of your throat. Maybe he needs guidance. How could he know anything about the human body really; about where to pull pleasure from?

“This feels nice,” you say quietly,”really nice.” You feel those lips form into a kind of smile against your skin. A breath of laughter cools the blue dollop of saliva on your skin as Hyunjin smiles against you. Your fingers run through his hair gently, noting the way the strands stiffen in your hold. “Can you lick—”

Pain.

Searing, never-ending pain, spreads across the expanse of your neck. The feeling of thin burning wetness and thick liquid pooling onto the cushion underneath you; a warm splash on your shoulder. All you can do is grunt and open your mouth in a silent scream as Hyunjin’s sharp teeth burrow their way into your neck. Your hold on his body turns into a desperate grip as you cry out finally.

“H-hyunjin! Stop!”

But before your brain can truly process the pain, the fact that Hyunjin has wounded you fiercely and unexpectedly like a rabid dog, the fire begins to dull again. With a slight tilt of his head, his teeth sink further into your skin and while you feel that warm wetness, that rush of blood rising to the surface, you also feel your toes curl, your back arch, and a flutter in your stomach.

There’s pleasure battling that pain now, taming it into something strange yet manageable.

“Sorry,” he mumbles moves away from the sensitive flesh. The reality of his action is clear as day as he wipes the mess of blue and red from his face, the now purple substance stains his shorts; maybe even the kitchen floor. When your finger tips reach to that bite, you find your blood frozen in time. It doesn’t flow faster or slower, it just simply stops moving altogether. As your fingers touch each puncture in your skin those teeth left behind, each perfectly pointed hole, that same pleasure rises again. “What did you do?” you whisper, eyes widening and then narrowing in confusion. Hyunjin’s tongue peeks out to lick the remaining fluid as he answers,”It’s... what we do. Like your ‘kiss’ ”.

Despite how badly you want to feel the mark, to assess the damage of what he’s done, you can no longer disregard the deep ache between your legs; the longing that sits deep in the pit of your stomach. Your clothes come off clumsily and land somewhere on the living room floor. Now emboldened Hyunjin’s hands slip underneath the fabric of your shirt. His eyes widen in awe at the feeling as if feeling your skin for the first time.

When you pull off your shirt and toss it somewhere in the corner, you realize that it is the first time he’s ever seen you naked. His fingers dance across your tan skin and trace each scar, each freckle, each mark, each stretch mark that litters your skin — that makes you human — in marvelous wonder. “You smell different now,” Hyunjin whispers,”sweeter.”

As you pull down your pants and rid yourself of the tacky fabric of your underwear, you wonder if he’s going to mark other areas with his bite and blue fluids. You want him to desperately. More than the fact that he looks like Hwang is your curiosity; your desire and want. What will it feel like? Will it all be pleasure pain? You need to know. Only when you’re naked in front of him does Hyunjin remove his open shirt to reveal a very human torso.

“Here,” you mumble, brushing your fingers along the top of your chest,”bite here.” Hyunjin doesn’t want to disappoint you in the slightest.

Another bite, another piercing of teeth, another painful moment that’s immediately eclipsed with pleasure. This time you cry out and arch into his body as he hovers. This time Hyunjin holds onto you for support and moves towards a hardened nipple. “Easy,” you say, voice heavy with haze and confusion,”Don’t bite there.” You already feel the grazing of a sharp tip digging into the very skin of your nipple. Hyunjin doesn’t move right away. He continues to tease, to encircle your peak with the very edge of his tooth as his eyes meet yours. “Hyunjin—”

Pulling the strands of his hair in an attempt to steer him away, he takes this as encouragement for his playful antics. Just before the sharp canine can break skin, your nipple meets the soft caress of his blue tongue. The plush appendage caresses your chest. Every so often, just as you lose yourself in his tongue, the threat of his canine jolts your crescendo of moans and pleas, resulting in the ever-present dribble and ache of your insides. The more his tongue entangles your chest, the heavier the scent of flowers rushes over your senses and blossoms on the inside of your nose and the back of your throat. His tongue leaves a blue-tinged residue that stays wet and thick against your skin as he pulls away.

The longer he licks, the more he licks, the more your body burns. Soon Hyunjin begins to travel around the expanse of your torso; nipping and tasting every inch of skin. As he travels and explores your body, the bites on your neck and chest burn deliciously with a feeling you can’t explain. With little effort, he kneels on the ground and pulls your leg over his shoulder. Whether he’s seen this before on the internet or read about it on of your many... books, you can’t bother to wonder. The burning turns to an ache. The aching turns into longing. The cycle continues in a never-ending circle that your honey-drunk brain can’t even process until Hyunjin viciously bites into the dip of your hip. This time your pleasure is unabashed, loud and wanton. You cry out, twisting his hair between your fingers and arching your hips further into his hold.

“Hyunjin, keep going,” you beg, your breath failing you,”c’mon, keep going, please!”

For once the alien is quiet and uninterested in banter. His eyes darken with interest as his nostrils flare. He sniffs the air pointedly. You’re too far gone to pretend to be embarrassed or attempt to make yourself wanton. You sit there calmly against the counter as his gaze wanders over your sex. The air around him changes as he continues. His fingers dance across the soft fleshy hood of your clit, thumb pressing against the small organ tentatively. As he continues staring and admiring the soft lines of your labia, Hyunjin begins licking his lips hungrily. You look down to see Hyunjin’s hungry gaze and the sight of blue-tinged drool lining the soft flesh on his face.

From this angle, you can see and feel the blue glossy substance on your skin. You can practically feel his hunger as his gaze remains unrelenting against you. All you want to do is feel him against you. The ache you feel in your chest is almost overwhelming. Raising your hips you thrust your hips forward him in a small cant, attempting to entice the alien. The open display of lewdness is enough to bring Hyunjin came to your reality.

His nose brushes against your wet. You can hear more than feel the way he takes a deep whiff of your arousal. You burn too much to be embarrassed by the display. Hyunjin’s fingers dig into either side of your flesh thighs and spread the skin there until he meets a clear view of his prize. A flash of blue comes across your vision before you feel the soft tongue lap at you. Its gentle in its ministrations, curious as it explores each fold and crevice. The velvety feel of the organ makes you push against it, pulling moans out of you as it molds and swishes against you.

Hyunjin groans around your hole as his tongue enters and sucks harshly at the swollen flesh of your opening and perineum. You’re so close to the full sensation of pleasure that you can nearly taste it. But Hyunjin is curious. He doesn’t search wholeheartedly for your orgasm, but instead flicks and twists his tongue inside of you. As his tongue digs further inside you, you note a hardness in the organ that wasn’t there a moment ago. It seems to grow firm nside you, those warty bumps on the side hardening as he searches you further and further. It’s when his tongue gets dangerously far that you feel a start of fear in you.

“Hyunjin,” you whisper on instinct, the slight fear in your voice undeniable. As hot as the sight of him between your legs is, there’s no telling if Hyunjin is even compatible with your body. Despite the very human features he seems to have, Hyunjin is ultimately wearing a disguise; appealing to your nature and what you deem appropriate. You have no idea what he could be like he’s in the mood. Would he spit venom as he crests? Would he rip out the flesh of your neck and claim you as his alien bride? Would his saliva, the blue-tinged liquid dripping from his appendage, melt your skin? Would he bite off your head like a praying mantis after it was all said and done?

There was no telling what could happen. But as Hyunjin’s tongue turns from that plush petal softness to rigid and firm, your mind begins to blank. The tongue slithers against your walls slowly, methodically, pressing with purpose against the ridges inside of you. If you pay close attention, you could’ve realized that Hyunjin is mapping your cunt with his tongue, tasting and learning each delicate crease that made up your hole. The appendage seems to change shape, becoming thicker and firmer, as you arch and moan in confusion and desperation. You can’t tell if it feels good or if it feels foreign and strange.

As Hyunjin continues, you begin to feel hotter. At first, you attribute this to your movements, your gasping and groaning as Hyunjin seems to eat you from the inside out, but you begin to realize that you wouldn’t sweat like this. Droplets of sweat blossom on your skin as you writhe underneath his hands. His grip remains firm as if you’re getting in the way of his fun.

As your hips follow along with the movement of his tongue, chasing after each push and pull of the appendage that swirls and flicks at your deepest parts, you feel a pressure building in your head. It’s insistent, needling, pushing against a sort of barrier that you didn’t even know you really had. It seems like the pain from last night is back briefly. Your nose scrunches at the feeling and your hand comes up to tug at your hair, attempting to relieve your scalp from the cold pressure. Darkness surrounds you as the pressure pushes and pushes until you finally begin to go slack, to give in. Only then do you hear it.

“Stay still.”

The voice is all too familiar.

You hear his voice bouncing off of your head and settling deep. But his mouth is busy, you thought, how could he be talking to me? It’s then that it clicks. It makes you shudder in disbelief. How much more about Hyunjin would you find out over the next couple of days? Can he read your mind?

When you look down at him, Hyunjin’s eyes are already there to greet you. He stares up to you with purpose, pushing against your spongy wall until you’re seeing stars again. Then your body alights with sensitivity, a sort of heat that seems to take over you. It feels more intense than any heat you’ve experienced, focused on a particular area.

A ping of nerves brings you out of your haze as Hyunjin’s tongue fully unfurls. It gets impossibly higher and soaks your walls with thickness. Finally, he emits a sound similar to a keen once he feels it.

When his tongue withdraws you feel incredibly empty and exposed. You can see your glossy fluids coating his tongue as he furls it back into his mouth. For a brief moment, your heat is sated. You reach for him and Hyunjin comes easily. Standing at his full height, you kiss the tops of his cheeks, his forehead, all around his face and grin as he mimics you. He presses clumsy kisses against the tops of your cheeks, your forehead, and all over. As you begin to relax, to feel the ache of those punctures all about your body, it’s back.

Furious and unending, mind-numbing and impossible need that burns every cell in your body. For a moment, you think of dying, of how death would surely come if this didn’t end soon. Hyunjin continues pressing tentative kisses across your face and neck. He finds his way to his initial mark on your body and sucks at the wound carefully. As he continues to bring you pleasure, to find ways to make you arch and cry, you yearn to bring him further. You yearn to make him ache and burn as you do. You yearn to make him cry out, to make him beg with undeniable burning pleasure.

As he continues his ministrations, your hand reaches between the two of you to find his shorts. You rub at the creases in his pants and feel for any sensitive piece of flesh that should be there, but you find...nothing. Your search is long enough that Hyunjin sits up slightly on his knees and watches your hand. There’s nothing hidden away in folds that swells with each particular rub. There’s nothing resting against his thigh, aching to be touched. There’s nothing but legs and some sort of hard object in his pants that’s circular in shape. It doesn’t give way like vaginas do; doesn’t resist and lean in to touch like cocks do; so what could be lying beneath the cotton fabric?

“What are you looking for?” Hyunjin asks, pressing your hand closer to a flat hard surface in his pants. It’s circular in nature with a hard outer shell and a soft middle. From what you can see now, there’s a slowly spreading wet patch that stains his pants. You rub tentatively, trying to alternate between the harder and slightly softer surface. Each rub, each firm push, seems to bring him further to the edge. Hyunjin pants slightly, eyes half lidded, as he stares at your thighs.

Rather than ask “what is that” you follow his lead and add pressure, nearly digging your hand into that rock hard surface. His eyes roll back into his head as he closes them, his hand gripping your wrist to keep you there. His hips begin thrusting into your hand steadily, a loud groan spilling from his lips. As he seems to crest, or get near to it, more fluid begins to stain his pants. Despite the cotton barrier, your hands begin to grow sticky with the liquid and the sight of Hyunjin coming undone in front of you has you clenching your thighs. “Show me,” you say, pulling your lower lip between your teeth,”show me.”

“I don’t think—”

“It’s okay. Really.”

Hyunjin pulls the fabric of his shorts down in one fluid motion. There’s no time to wonder about the lack of underwear once you see the sight of it. A light blue and purple sheath with a long drooling slit in the middle. You reach your hand out again and run your fingers along the drooling slit, smiling at the way Hyunjin shudders and his hands tighten on the waistband of his pants. There isn’t a sense of alarm or confusion like you thought there would be. There also isn’t a sense of disgust. The sight of Hyunjin shuddering in pleasure, the clear arousal in his eyes, is enough to keep you going. But some of that leaves you when the narrow slit starts to widen and open.

The first thing you notice is the color. The elaborate baby blues and light purples and baby pinks all bleed together into a delicious portrait of delicate wet flesh. The second thing you notice is the shape. It’s...a tentacle. An elongated curved shaft forms into a gently pointed tip. Out of the hard shell that encased his cock is a flap of purple flesh that gently folds over the sensitive area of his possible pubis. The tentacle is smooth with no defined ridges or creases. It curves gently, elegantly in the middle as the worm-like tip seemingly searches for its promised temporary home. Rather than dribbling cum from the smooth head, the appendage is wet all over. It dribbles more of that thick blue-cyan fluid all over; some occasionally lands on the shorts that have pooled on the floor.

It’s beautiful.

The third and final thing you notice is the slight movement of the tip independently from the “shaft”. It jerkily moves before holding still as if searching for something.

Is he doing that, you think to yourself, is he moving it?

“No.” Hyunjin says quietly,”I’m not.”

It’s then that you notice how tightly he's holding onto your form. You move your hand towards the organ and pet the flesh gently, gasping as it violently twitches in your hand. A firm hold on it has Hyunjin grunting out and shuddering before you can even properly jerk the flesh.

“Sensitive?”

He doesn’t respond, only shakes in your hold. It’s warm in your hand and each squeeze has Hyunjin panting harder; as if you’re stroking a raw nerve. Your hand wanders to the flap of his skin, fingers carefully and gently sliding underneath. Hyunjin’s resulting moan, loud and wanton, has you jumping nearly out of your skin.

“Please,” he moans, breathy and desperate,”please, please please please please” — it goes on and on until you shush him and say,”Okay, okay.” More fluid drips from around the organ and lands in thick ribbons on your thighs. When you look up at him, you see a blue tint on the tops of his cheeks. Is he blushing?

There are no guiding hands that hold his cock in place as Hyunjin turns you around and bends you over the counter. As you lean against the harsh surface, you can feel his long fingers in your hair that grab viciously at your curls. You feel prodding and pressure as the slender tip of his tentacle nudges its way into you. It bullies its way into your walls. It has a mind of its own as it demands the promise of heat. When Hyunjin fully enters you, you swear he’s slightly bigger than before. But before you can question, his hips begin to move. As he thrusts, you can feel the tip nudge around your walls as if poking you. Suddenly the tip pokes hard in an upwards motion and finds what it's looking for. You gasp and cling to Hyunjin’s shoulders as your spongy flesh is pounded mercilessly until your voice grows hoarse and your toes curl; until your back arches; until you can feel the very second your brain goes cock drunk.

You flutter around him and squeeze so tight that Hyunjin can only moan aloud. His tongue hangs with the feeling of it, breathing barely able to catch up. Then you’re there crying out your pleasure and simultaneously choking on the tip of his tongue as it curls around and licks into your mouth. It nearly swallows you whole, nearly drowns you in the feeling. His pace slows slightly and for a split second, you notice the lack of stirring, the sound of fluids mixing. In fact, there isn’t as much give either. Your stomach tight with orgasm stays tense as it accommodates a thicker more prominent length than before.

“Hyunjin,” you whimper,”What...?”

The tip still abuses your spongy flesh despite the change in size. As he picks up the pace, you feel the effort in each vicious thrust, each punch of his cock in your narrow hole; each drag against your ridges. In an attempt to steady himself, Hyunjin sits up and presses against your lower stomach. “You taste good,” he groans, nearly drooling. Your moans turn to screams, begging for all he’s willing to give. Would you die here? Impaled by him in the throes of passion? Just how deep could he go?

“Hy-Hyun- oh my god.”

The pointed curved head of his cock presses against your spongy insides as he sits fully inside of you. You look down at your stomach, eyes glazing over the bite marks on your flesh, and notice a very noticeable bump staring back at you. You feel far too full, far too stuffed to even process what’s happening to you. How could you even take that much of him to begin with? It almost embarrasses you how willing your body is to let him in, to accept him. “Breathe,” he hisses quietly, a sound that seems like it’s meant to be reassuring.

You feel far too full, far too stuffed to even process what’s happening to you. How could you even take that much of him to begin with? It almost embarrasses you how willing your body is to let him in, to accept him. “Breathe,” he hisses quietly, a sound that seems like it’s meant to be reassuring.

It’s bigger now. It’s thicker and more insistent as it bruises your gummy walls. The slap of wet flesh plunging into an impossibly tight hole filling the room. You can feel just how deep he is now. The deepest that anyone or anything has ever been. Deeper than anything or anyone should be. Just as you start to adjust to the impossible feeling of being full, you feel another nudge against an entirely different hole. You can’t see where it comes from or what part of Hyunjin it’s coming out of, but you can only assume another tentacle has come through. The feel cool fluid drool into your ass. Somewhere in the distance, in the haze that Hyunjin has created, you feel that pressure against your temples. Then you hear it.

“Okay?”

It doesn’t take much to give your consent. The idea of Hyunjin filling almost every hole he can find has you clenching around his cock involuntarily. You nod against the counter and push your hips against the wet tentacle. That’s all it takes. You are a little scared when it pushes easily inside of you. Whatever viscous fluid coats his second tentacle makes its wandering form easier to take. You’re so hot now, so incredibly turned on, that you can’t even care about the danger. You’re willing to take anything and everything. You cum again. And again. The orgasm is a constant thing that leaves you shaking underneath him, leaving you leaking clear fluid onto your kitchen floor.

It goes on seemingly forever. Hyunjin doesn’t grow anymore in size — Thank God — but his hips never stop their brutal pace. His cock, the tentacle fiendishly ripping orgasm from orgasm out of you, doesn’t give any indication of stopping. Your heat continues to burn, although not as fiercely, with every pounding of his hips. Through the haze of your coupling, lightning shocks through your lower back as you cum again. Hyunjin doesn’t slow down once; doesn’t even seem inconvenienced by the frequent sound of your spent hitting the tile beneath you. Despite the difference in your species, the animalistic act of mating is something that comes easily to the both of you. You moan in his hold, cry out when he continues grinding out that spongy spot in you.

Suddenly something changes in the air.

Hyunjin’s hips finally stutter. The second tentacle spasms against the tight heat of your ass while the first begins to pulse. As it pulses, you feel a harsh coolness soothe your burning walls. The fluid sits heavily in your stomach as Hyunjin continues releasing his spent. It begins to hurt a little as he finishes, some of the cyan fluid leaking out onto the floor below you. You feel fuller than before, even as Hyunjin begins to decrease in size. He pulls you closer as you squirm in his hold, crying out in pleasure when the second tentacle continues moving slightly.

Suddenly Hyunjin finds his way to your shoulder, and with some finality, bites into the flesh there. This is deeper than the others, unyielding and harsh. If you weren’t currently so full of thick viscous fluid, you’d notice just how close to your arteries he is. The sensation of being to full, the savagery of the bite, is enough to put you over the edge again. Your vision blears on the edges as you feel yourself release onto the floor below you for a final time. It’s Hyunjin’s weight that keeps you pinned to your place on the counter. It’s also Hyunjin’s weight that keeps you collapsing into a heap on the floor. Before you faint, before you fall into Hyunjin’s arms and succumb yourself to the rest you so very much need. Before your consciousness slips from you, you hear one last thing that makes you bubble with fear.

“Mate.”

#hyunjin x reader #hwang hyunjin #skz x reader #stray kids x reader #skz fanfic #skz fic #hyunjin fic #hyunjin smut #uhhhhhhhh #aliens #alien 1979 #alien x human #stray kids #skz #hyunjin

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howtostandinsilence · 8 months

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Alina's sun summoner ability cannot be a metaphor for her escaping the cycle of abuse and living her own peaceful life when its very presence indicates something entirely different about her character. When her abilities are tied more closely to her identity and her growing path to self discovery, any framing of their presence in her life as only a fight against abuse comes across as cheap and shows a spectacular misunderstanding of her character.

Alina losing her abilities doesn't show a need to no longer fight. It doesn't show freedom or liberation. It shows instead brutal oppression and cruelty. 'She can be on her own and the darkness cant get to her anymore' is a funny way of describing the loss of a light power that could by nature repel the darkness and bring her kinship. In fact, it is almost a direct misinterpretation of the events that took place, and through its very wording contradicts itself.

Alina losing her powers cannot be a big metaphor for letting go of the past and moving onto internal peace when it drives her into a horrific regression and throws her into an eternal misery and grief stricken state. Where her very being is repressed so that she may conform and assimilate to her oppressors.

You cannot state that this hatred of her ending is only because it has been done terribly to other female characters before as if this is all some transferred bias. Alina's story is itself regressive through it's own path throughout the books. Her repression and the championing of her internalized bigotry through a narrative that structures itself around restrictive and puritanical morality can be easily tracked, picked apart, and analyzed as itself a story that rejects any real liberation or character progression to force the main female character into a box of conformity.

While Alina strives to be loved and cared for, she states multiple times what she truly wants. Which is the ability to accept and love all of herself in every way, with the freedom to love who she wants and to craft an ending that she wants, where she does not have to give up any of this. That Alina's very desire to have an ending where she can live freely is rejected so that fans can pat themselves on the back for liking her canonical regression feels grotesque. She did not actually want her ending. She could barely stomach it.

Alina's powers did not only represent her fight against abuse. They represented something more to her fundamental character and her arc of self actualization. There is no peoticism in her losing her powers except that of a greek tragedy and it's unfortunate protagonist. Alina didn't even choose to lose her powers. They were stripped from her against her will. In every way, her agency and pershonhood and very wishes are violated. But this is ignored in favor of championing some "subversive" and "enlightened" and apparently feminist story that simply does not exist.

#shadow and bone #sab salt #alina starkov #siege and storm #ruin and rising #the darkling #sab meta #the grisha trilogy

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aspoonofsugar · 3 months

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hey! Good day :) here to ask a question!! I was wondering about your process for analysis, character analysis, theme analysis- do you just write or are there specific things you look for? I suppose I’m curious if you have an idea/general gist of what you’re doing or steps you take to do your breakdowns. I’m trying to do something similar out of interest and your works are simply fascinating to read. I look up to your writing a lot!

hello!! Can I ask how you started analysing shows, how you went about it? I’m learning literary analysis and trying to do the same for hunter x hunter but I find it infinitely harder to analyse shows. Especially since I most notably consider diction in literary analysis lol

Hi!

Thank you for your nice words anon(s) and yay! I love meta-asks <3<3<3

So, it depends on the meta. In general, I try to focus on a specific topic, which can be:

a character (arc + foiling between characters)

a theme

the use of a specific motif, when it comes to a character or a theme

These are my three favourite kinds of analyses, but there are other types, as well. For example, some people are really into plot theories/predictions. Others prefer to focus on characters from a psychological viewpoint. Some other writers like to use philosophical lens or to compare different works. It really depends on your preference.

My preference is mostly for thematic analyses. This means that my character metas too tend to use a thematic lens. So...

WHAT IS THE THEME?

In short, the theme of a story is both:

the topic the story is exploring

the moral of the story, aka a phrase which summarizes its message

Stories explores topics through characters and plot, while the way the conflict is solved tells us the moral.

Some examples:

RWBY's main topic is humanity in both its weakness and strength and its moral is that victory is in a simple soul

Madoka's main topic is wishes and its moral is that it is worth to want things and to fight for them, even if it is painful

HXH is strange structurally, but its main topic is self-search, with its moral being that a person should not focus on the goal, but enjoy the journey

All of these messages and ideas aren't just things stated in dialogues (even if someone saying the theme helps). They emerge from the story itself.

RWBY's main conflict is about a destroyed world (remnant) surviving the anger of an evil witch (Salem). If humans let hate divide them, they lose. If they unite, they win. The main thematic question is then... can humans make the right choice? And the answer is that they can, as long as they remain simple souls (Ruby, but also Pyrrha at Beacon, Blake in Managerie, Yang in Mistral, Weiss with her family, JNR when they tag along and Penny in Atlas). The main message is that several people making the right choice leads to change. And that is humanity. This is why the characters keep being asked to give up their idealism and to embrace a more utilitarian way of doing things. And this is why every time they refuse and stick to their idealism. The conflict itself keeps testing their resolution.

Madoka's power system works through wishes, so the girls' powers and their backstories are all defined by their wishes and by how they relate to them. Madoka doesn't know what she wants. Homura's wish turns into an obsession. Mami makes a wish too early and thinks only about herself. Kyouko and Sayaka make a wish for someone else and have opposite reactions to their wishes ending poorly. Finally, it is revealed the girls' wishes are literally the force that keeps the world at balance. So, the plot, character arcs, conflict and worldbuilding are all about wishes.

HXH is made up of several arcs and each arc has its own theme. That said, the overall structure conveys the main theme. Gon's objective is to find Ging, but he keeps taking detours and getting engulfed in unrelated conflicts. However, the moment he meets Ging he realizes it is not his father who defines him, but rather it is all the people he met in his journey and his own experiences. Basically, HXH's strange structure conveys the main theme.

So, the theme (both topic and moral) should emerge by the characters, the worldbuilding, the conflict and sometimes even by the structure itself. In order to find it, one should start with the topic and ask themselves "What does the story really talk about?". The answer to this question will let you understand the theme as topic. The second step is to see how the story explores it.

DIFFERENT POINTS OF VIEW ON THE TOPIC

There are different ways a story can explore a topic. Still, the best stories have different perspectives clash with each other. Very often these different points of view are embodied by different characters.

Here are some examples, with some linked metas that explore the respective stories more in depth.

Madoka (topic= wishes):

Homura is determined to fulfill her wish no matter what

Kyubey is her opposite, as they are unable to wish since they lack feelings. This is why they need to recruit girls into creating energy through wishes

Madoka is in the middle, as she wants to wish for something, but doesn't know what

Mami, Kyouko and Sayaka all explore negative effects linked to wishes, which are connected to other secondary themes. Specifically, Mami explores the consequences of an immature wish, while Sayaka and Kyouko explore the selfishness/selflessness inherent in wishes

The conflict is solved through Madoka learning about the price of wishes, but still choosing to make a wish and to sacrifice her whole self for it. This ending conveys a specific moral: despite the pain and sacrifice that comes with them, wishes are still beautiful and worth it all. If Madoka had chosen to give up being a magical girl and had ended up the series without making a wish, the moral would have been the opposite: that a normal life is better than grandiose and dangerous dreams.

Monster (topic = the value of life)

Tenma believes that all lives are equal, which is why he chooses to save Johan as a child, despite being ordered to operate a far more influential patient.

Eva and Nina believe that not all lives are equal. In particular, Eva thinks that social status and importance in society influence the value of one's life. Nina instead believes that people who commit crime should be punished and lose their lives.

Johan believes no-life has value, including his own. In his words, the only thing all humans are equal in is death.

Here, the moral is conveyed through the Tenma/Nina vs Johan's conflict. Tenma is tested in his beliefs, but ultimately does not abandon them and ends the story by saving Johan. Nina instead is asked to change her mind, as she ends the story embracing Tenma's point of view.

RWBY - The Atlas Arc (topic = trust)

Ozpin lacks trust, as he is unable to trust others, no matter how loyal or dedicated to his cause they are

Ruby wants to "trust safely". She wants others, like Ironwood, to prove themselves to her before disclosing the truth to them

Ironwood is initially on Ruby's same page, but he spirals and comes to embody the "enemy of trust" aka control. He doesn't trust others, but wants to control them.

Oscar embodies trust, as he wants to trust Ironwood since the beginning. Even later on, he keeps on trusting people like Hazel and Emerald who are his enemies.

Cinder embodies another "enemy of trust", aka manipulation. She doesn't need to trust others to work with them, as she can use their feelings and wishes against them.

Penny embodies faith, which is a more extreme form of trust. She sacrifices herself and leaves the maiden power to Winter. She has no proof Winter will be able to save Weiss, Jaune or the relic, but she entrusts the future to her.

All these characters struggle with trust and its dangers. Some, like Ozpin, Ironwood and Cinder decide that trusting is too dangerous. Others, like Ruby, Penny and Oscar realize that to trust is the only way to move forward. Moreover, they learn there is not way to trust safely. As a matter of fact the moral of the arc is that "trust is a risk" and risks mean that things can end up badly. Still, not to take risk means to give up hope.

Hazbin Hotel - You didn't know song (topic= knowledge)

This song explores the idea of knowlege. The characters are after all in the middle of a questioning, which leads to several secrets coming out. Moreover, throughout it all the characters either admit or realize how ignorant they all are. The way they deal with this lack of knowledge establishes different thematic stances.

Charlie and Emily are both naive and ignore the darkest sides of their loved ones. Charlie doesn't know Vaggie used to be an exorcist and Emily has no idea Sera ordered the exterminations. Still, their answer to ignorance is to keep on questioning. They have no idea why only certain souls are admitted in heaven. Still, they think it is important to investigate the phenomenon and use it as evidence that there might be hope for the spirits in hell.

Lute and Adam don't know why some spirits end up in hell and others in heaven. Still, they do not bother to question it. So, Adam is caught by surprise by Charlie's question and has to improvise an answer. Not only that, but even later on the duo insist that Angel not being in Heaven proves he is unholy. And that's it.

Sera does know about the extermination, as she knows the system is unfair. Still, she refuses to question it and forbids others to do the same. She is the only one whose sin isn't ignornace, but knowledge.

There is no a clear thematic resolution to the question posed by the song. This is because the series is not over yet. However, the scene sets up the theme and the way characters will deal with it in later seasons will give us the moral.

As you can see, not only whole stories (like Madoka, or Monster) have themes, but also arcs (RWBY) and even episodes or scenes (Hazbin Hotel). That said, the way to go at it is always the same. Pintpoint the main topic and start investigate how the characters or the worldbuilding deal with it. You are gonna get several stances. The one which emeges victorious is the moral.

Let's highlight that the moral is not always embodied by the protagonist. For example, in the Madoka and RWBY's examples, Madoka and Ruby are initially at a loss and come to learn the moral by the end of the story (for Madoka) and arc (for Ruby). Similarly, Tenma initially does believe the moral, but doubts it throughout the story, only to be reminded and helped by other characters (like Nina).

In any case, the way the protagonist and characters in general relate to the main theme and to secondary themes is key for their arcs.

CHARACTERS AND THEME

When it comes to theme a character can either:

Believe the moral since the beginning

Not believe the moral since the beginning

In the first case, the character either stops believing the moral by the end (negative arc) or keeps believing the moral until the end (positive arc). In the second case, the character either learns the moral (positive arc) or doesn't learn the moral (negative arc).

In short, the story keeps challenging the character on their beliefs and they must either stick to their point of view or change it, depending if they believe in the moral since the beginning or not.

Exhibit A:

Charlie's belief that sinners can be redeemed is right. Still, in the beginning nobody else agrees with her, so she is challenged by the world around her. Her objective is not to lose faith in the Hazbin Hotel and to inspire others to change their mind too. Throughout her journey, she is bound to grow too. She starts as sheltered and naive with a simplistic idea of what redemption is. By the end, she will gain a deeper understanding of redempion and will grow as a result.

Exhibit B:

Eren's journey is about realizing what freedom (the main topic) is about. The problem is that he fixates himself on the idea that freedom means no boundaries, either natural nor humans. This leads him to embrace destruction and nihilism and to lose himself. In the end, the character who realizes what freedom truly is is Mikasa. She doesn't discard her bond with Eren, but is still able to make independent choices and to live as herself. In short, Eren doesn't learn the moral, hence why he spirals instead of growing.

Charlie is a protagonist who knows the moral and will grow with it in a positive arc. Eren is a protagonist who doesn't know the moral and never learns it. This is why he has a tragic negative arc.

These are just two examples, but there can be different combinations. By interrogating yourself on how characters relate to a theme, you get better a better understanding of their role in the story and of their overall arcs.

Still, how to find themes in a story? Luckily, each text is full of hints that are there for us to interpret them.

MOTIFS

Motifs are repetitive details within a story, which are used to communicate themes.

Anything can be a motif: a line, a musical tune, a specific imagery, an object. By repeating them in key moments throughout a narrative, they become symbols, which means they can lead to bigger metaphors and convey specific meanings.

In the song More Than Anything, dream is one of the main topics. We realize it because the characters keep mentioning it. At the same time, light keeps popping up. Lucifer summons light and throws it away, Charlie rememebrs a light show Lucifer imrpovised for her. Lucifer and Charlie start the song in the shadow and they end it in the light. This means that "light" is a motif throughout the song and by seeing how it is used we better understand the theme and the relationship between the two characters. We understand that light is a metaphor for dreams. Lucifer gives up on it, Charlie is inspired by it and eventually Lucifer summons it back as he has decided to believe in Charlie's dream. By looking at the way light is used, we can see that Charlie teaches Lucifer the moral that it is worth it to fight for dreams and not to give up on them.

In the CAA of HXH, gungi is a motif that comments both the topic of humanity and Meruem and Komugi's relationship. Their matches become a metaphor of monstrosity vs humanity, as humanity slowly conquers Meruem to the point he himself chooses to live and die as a human, rather than the King of the Ants. Similarly, Kokoriko symbolically becomes Komugi and Meruem's child, in the sense they give birth to this move and evolve the game.

Sometimes, their meaning is unique to the story. For example, gungi is a motif that makes sense within HxH and can't be brought outside of the series, as it is not a real world game. It only exists in that universe. Some other times, a motif can tie to bigger sets of symbols. For example, light and shadow are universal symbols that bring with them several additional meanings:

Good and Evil

The Jungian persona shadow

In the Hazbin Hotel song the first dychotomy doesn't fit, while the second one does. Initially both Lucifer and Charlie hide things from each other (shadow), whereas by the end they show who they are (light).

In short, to analyze a story, you should find its key motifs. They are hints to better understand the theme and the characters. Different stories will use different motifs and tie them to different wider sets of symbols. To find the right ones can help a lot in better understanding a story, as a whole.

Some examples:

RWBY uses fairy tales and alchemy as its main motif, so these two sets of symbols are the most useful to analyze the series

HxH is a shonen and uses its powers and fights to convey character arcs and themes, so to analyze one's nen abilities helps a lot

Hazbin Hotel is a musical series that takes inspiration from religion and mythology. So, it is probable that the best understanding of it will come from analyzing its songs and from looking into its religion inspiration

Of course this doesn't mean you should only use one motif to analyze a story. For example, you can use RWBY's semblances to look into the characters, as well. And there are some fairy tale allusions in Hazbin too. In the end, it is about using what best helps you understand a story as a whole.

What is more, there are general sets of symbols that can be useful in most stories, such as jungian archetypes. Finally, you might want to start from other aspects of the story itself, rather than theme or characters or plot. For example, you might be drawn to the world-building and realize it is used in a special way to explore the theme. Or you might be curious about character designs and see that they have their own symbolism (for example, I believe RWBY ones do and probably Hazbin Hotel ones, as well).

SOME PRACTICAL ADVICE

I have linked in the title of each paragraph, but this last one an article by @septembercfawkes. Her posts are great to better understand narrative structure and I found them enlightening.

I think the best thing you can do is to start with focused metas. Choose a scene, a character, a motif that intrigues you and start exploring it. It is better to start small and to narrow your focus, it would be easier to organize your article.

I usually outline the contents of the meta before starting to write it. Still, it sometimes changes as I keep writing.

It can be useful to write at the beginning of your analysis what you are gonna do. It will help you remember what the point of the meta is. For example, in my RWBY allusion meta or HxH nen meta, I always start with the motif I am analyzing. I summarize the fairy tale (even if many people know it already) and I explain what the character's ability is about. It helps organizing the flow and the contents.

The more you analyze the better you become at it, so it is just a matter of starting :)

Thank you for the asks, I hope this was helpful and not too much confusing!

Have a nice day!

#writing #meta-asks #asksfullofsugar #anonymous #sweet anon

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dvasva · 7 months

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Tbh? I think the radiant emperor duology deserves more critique than it gets in its tag, so after stewing it over for a couple weeks and also discussing it with my friend, I have decided to do it myself.

So. Spoilers for She Who Became the Sun and He Who Drowned The World ahead.

First off, so nobody accuses me of hating the series, I liked the series. I'd say I'd give the first book a 4.5/5, I thoroughly enjoyed it, and I like both books. I truthfully skipped the fisting scene, it triggered some dysphoria that I wasn't comfortable with personally but I don't have problem with it existing in the book, it's good where it is, no changes.

No, my critiques come mostly from the second book, hwdts. Which sucks because I absolutely loved Baoxiang in it, it's a well known fact that my ideal type is pretty, really mean, characters. ('What about Madam Zhang?!!!???!? Shes mean and pretty!!' I hear you ask. Give it a second cause i will get to my beloved madam zhang) So, my critiques are mostly organized as 'The first part I didn't like in Hwdtw that signals the thing that became my biggest issue, the bits in the middle that i did like along with the bits that I felt didn't really work well, and Act 3 which is where my issues really were exacerbated.'

By the end of book one, I had a general annoyance but acceptance that Ma Xiuying was a bit of a weak character, and not weak as in 'dang shes a woman and cant fight' or any other sexist way you may interpret that, but weak as in structurally, she didn't really have as much depth as other characters. I thought she didn't have as much time put into her character as others. And yeah you could have a million character analysis essays over Ma and her place in the story and etc, but for me, her setup for the next book as potentially having conflict with Zhu or her own morals was the most interesting part of Ma. In general I think a lot of people tend to overlook this flaw partly because Ma is a cis lesbian character and the main 'love interest' in a book that is usually marketed to people as sapphic, which yeah there is certainly a sapphic relationship in the book but I think saying it's a major part of the book is really giving the relationship a load bearing wall ot isn't strong enough to carry. The Radiant Emperor Duology is not a romance, first and foremost. To describe it as a wlw romance is gonna leave people who read ot specifically for that reason kinda dissappointed by the end of book 2.

My big critiques didn't start until book two, and a particular scene, though. Ma, at the start of book two, was generally filling the niche of 'nagging wife' to zhu, which yknow, is a fine place to start from. I was a little disappointed there was no further discussion of Ma's disapproval of the morality of Zhu's actions, and in fact the dead child was pretty much entirely forgotten by Ma in favor of being Zhu's wife. Which, yknow, sure.

The Scene I had issue with happened (Spoilers once again) after Zhu finally captures Ouyang and imprisons him at her base of operations. Ma, dressed in her empressly regalia enters his room with the intention of being the bigger person. She walks in, looks at the stripped down and humiliated general who killed her father and famously is also really a women hater, and tells him she forgives him for killing her father. And then she gets upset and cries when the prideful general who hates women gives her a dressing down and taunts her and is like 'I'm glad I killed your father'? She nearly cries because Ouyang was mean to her (notably only cause he was mean to her and didn't gracefully accept her forgiveness, not because he killed ehr father) and runs off to Zhu. And Zhu responds with 'Wow, he's just a weirdo, everyone likes you and everyone in existance immediately knows you're a good person and you change people.' Which, my friend suggested before she finished the book, was a case of Zhu placating Ma and dismissing her feelings which would be an interesting dynamic.

Really my hangups with this scene come from multiple parts.

1. Ma' few character traits including being observant and reading people really well (a thing she's praised for in book 1) and having good social intuition are completely thrown out by her thinking being alone with ouyang and forgiving him would be a good idea and then her being shocked and upset when he spat on her forgiveness. And

2. Zhu's response is never once treated by the text as her dismissing Ma and placating her, and Zhu's statement despite never being shown to be true before and that moment being the first time it's ever mentioned, ends up becoming Chekov's moral purity by the end of the book, where the plot hinges on Ma being able to magically heal a damaged character's mind enough for Zhu to win in the end. Which I will get back to. There's a lot of other stuff happening between here and the end.

So, before I get back to Ma and her role in the story, I'll address some other bits from after this scene. Both problems and things I enjoyed generally.

Madam Zhang and her parallels to Baoxiang and her being the absolute queen of dissociating really was interesting (before act 3). She was a very compelling character who I completely understood and felt positively about. She had a way more interesting relationship with gender imo than Ma did, especially in book 2. I didn't really like that she was overwhelmingly shown having sexual villence done to her, that felt weirdly like a punishment. But, I did like her a whole bunch, and I liked the look we got into her head. She was probably my second, maybe third, favorite character in the whole book until Act 3.

I really, really liked Ouyangs dynamic and relationship with Zhu. The weird sexual tension between them, their weird kinda nonsexual but also kinda very sexual S&M relationship. It was somehow the most sensual, sexual part of a book that featured Madam Zhang having sex with multiple people, and Zhu going down on Ma, and a lot of other mentions of sex or scenes involving sex. Tbh I feel like, in a way, Ma was left to the sidelines for most of the book because Ouyang became the primary 'love' interest for a hot second there and the only reason Ma could get her spot back was Ouyang and Zbu's separation. Also, from what I've seen when people talk about this book, they always kinda try to express Zhu and Ouyang's dynamic as very nonsexual and nonromantic, as platonic mostly. And there is no inherent superiority of romantic over platonic, but I think to insist that it is only platonic, and not a strange swirl of romantic, platonic, sexual, frustration and relief, and a swirl of familiarity and vulnerability all wrapped into one, is doing the dynamic a bit of a disservice. And ther is, imo, very clearly a subtle hint of romantic intent and interest on Ouyang's part before he realizes Zhu has a body he hates.

Which is also another point I didn't like. Ouyang and Zhu's relationship end felt off. The entire bit with the pirates felt off, but especially how Ouyang found out about Zbu's body, and how Zhu reacted. I think Ouyang finding out second hand, from a combination of being suspicious and from Jiang saying it, was a poor way for that to be revealed. I think there was a better way for that to happen that woyld have felt more like a betrayl to zhu than this did. The fact that Zhu and Ouyang were so in tune and could see each other perfectly, but this one thing was a blind spot for both of them because of how unaffected by gender Zhu was compared to how overaffected by gender Ouyang was is a really interesting thing to explore, an interesting disconnect between two character's whose entire basis for their relationship is 'like recognizes like'. I think Zhu seeing it as a betrayl would have been more impactful if she had presented this informatuon to Ouyang herself and been rejected than how it went down. And, I think her not realizing Ouyang would be disgusted that he felt connected and felt a sameness to someone with a body he found grotesque and that he feared would have been more interesting for zhu, who views herself outside of womanhood and didnt really think that other people would not see her outside of womanhood, if she was the one who told ouyang herself.

Also, less importantly, think going into Ouyangs annoyance that zhu kept moving his target further away was a good move but it wasn't expanded on as much for my taste. I also really liked it when (spoiler) Xu Da dies, and that entire part despite some minir bits, was extremely good in that Zhu finally has tasted loss. She had, up until that point, been riding a wave of positivity, she was the underdog who won over and over again despite all the odds and despite her own reckless choices. So I did appreciate that everything went wrong for her at least once. that would have been, imo if other things were changed, a good place to end a book two in a three book series. Which will make sense as to why I mention it im a bit.

I also didn't like how Ma was nonexistant unless the plot was like 'ok we need to remind people that Ma exists.'

And there's of course other stuff but those are the main points of acts 1 and 2 that i wasn't fond of or that i liked.

Act 3 is a wholely different behemoth which can be encapsulated with 'I wish it was longer but also different' (courtesy of the convo my friend and I had).

My friend and I both agreed that we liked this kind of courtly drama game it was playing. My friend doesn't tend to like the structure or writing style of a lot of the chinese wuxia, danmei, or courtly drama translated books i read, so it was nice to know that the genre content isn't the issue for her there.

The biggest problems I had with the ending though was 1. I think Baoxiang and Ma had an interesting dynamic despite it being really rushed and how distasteful I found the entire concept of Ma being such a good wholesome goody good good person that she could change Baoxiang, quiet his demons and fix him in some way. That was annoying in an otherwise interesting dynamic. And 2. I think Madam Zhang's character traits and cleverness and all that were wiped away to make her inexplicably jealous of Ma in a way that I don't think fit her character and just served to fit a trope of jealous empress who hates the favored concubine.

So, here's my major proposed changes.

1. Ma gets sent to Khanbaliq extremely early on. Like, act one maybe after ouyang is captured early. This serves three purposes. A. Ma has something to do and is more present in the story. this could be a good xhance to let her actually feel frustrated or upset at Zhu in some tangible way that needs to be resolved or talked thru eventually. B. she gets more time to build a relationship with Baoxiang, whose entire defeat hinges on him having a strong connection with her. and C. Her absence in the other parts of the book feel less like she's being ignored or forgotten. It makes Zhu's lack of haste more than just a way to annoy Ouyang, and turns it into an interesting moral choice. Should she rush to Khanbaliq to save Ma or trust that Ma will be ok in favor of gaining power? Her lack of haste means Ouyang leaves, depressed, and she loses Xu Da, all while she doesn't even have the assurance that Ma is ok, she is truly at her lowest point with nobody with her. If Ma is in Khanbaliq and that's explored, then Zhu and Ouyang can also explore their dynamic without Ma feeling a bit like she is battling for Zhu's attention.

2. Madam Zhang is suspicious of Ma, or feels actually tangibly threatened by Ma. In act 3, Madam Zhang's anger towards Ma feels really out of place. She got exactly what she wants, she is empress, her emperor isn't interested in removing her from her position and her position isn't threatened by anyone. Baoxiang won't get rid of her, he won't demote her, he has shown zero sign of ever even considering it. So, why is Madam Zhang jealous of Ma? Imo, especially since she very clearly has dissociated into oblivion and has no love or affection for anyone anymore, and no real desire or motivation to secure her position further aside from maybe producing an heir to make sure shes taken care of after Baoxiang dies, there's no reason for her to be inextricably jealous of Ma. It kinda just erases all of Madam Zhang's political savvy and cunning into jealous, petty woman, and that sucks. If she was suspicious of Ma's intention, or Baoxiang genuinely expressed spmething that actively threatened her position, her hatred of Ma would make sense, but instead she hates Ma cause Ma is ugly and spends every night with Baoxiang. She hated rice buckets concubine cause that concubine used a lot of funds and competition genuinely made her position less stable. She needs better motivation for hating Ma.

3. As I mentioned earlier, Zhu needs to be the one to tell Ouyang that she does not have a dick. That's just all around better, it feels more like a betrayl to bare your secrets and be rejected, etc etc.

4. The duology should have been a trilogy, with book 3 starting when Zhu is at her lowest, ouyang is dead, ma is in khanbaliq, Xu Da is dead, a new guy is the emperor. This is where a book three should have started. in a series that has so many important characters, i feel like it needs more space. she's in a 10 gallon tank when really she needs a 30 gallon tank. Lots of it, especially towards the end of book 2, felt rushed and the extra book will absolutely push that back a bit and make it less rushed.

Anyways that's my critique of The Radiant emperor duology. Once Again, I liked the series, its one of my favorites i've read all year. I don't dislike it, and having a critique or opinion about something doesnt mean I didn't like the book or understand the book (because obviously if i understood it i would understand why its flawless). I liked it, there are things I wish were different, that's it.

#radiant emperor #he who drowned the world #she who became the sun #radiant emperor spoilers #spoiler #i wrote this in like 2 hours at 4 am and i got lazy halfway thru editing it so if theres typos rip #i just needed to get it out of my brain #organized in text somewhere other than jamies discord dms #thank you jamie also #i have a lot of opinions on this duology #some i didnt even mention cause its 6:30 and i forgot #i think shelley parker chan wants to write nblm or mlm books tbh #i dont think they really wanna write sapphic books #and tbh im ok with that i think there should be more books about transmascs #the tiktok/tumblr habit of describing a book with tags really also doesnt help this book also #i think to say 'sapphic enemies to lovers' for this kind of book gives people the wrong impression #especially since once again i wouldnt really describe it as sapphic in the genre way #anyhow again so nobody kills me #i did like the books #i enjoyed them i loved them i did not hate them at all

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emblemxeno · 9 months

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I know ranting about Birthright's localization is kind of my new obnoxious thing, but the really unfortunate aspect about it is that I very much love Birthright's main narrative structure and themes.

Much like how Conquest is a spin on how you're effectively playing the Camus role in the conflict and grappling with the baggage that comes with it, Birthright is also flip on the traditional FE plot. Instead of Corrin having his home taken over during war, becoming an exile/refugee, and needing to gather other allies to take it back, he actively sides against the home he knew his entire life. Corrin's desire to stop the war as quickly as possible and his disgust towards Nohr's crimes overrides his personal fondness towards Nohr as the place where he grew up surrounded by love and strong familial connection.

This is why his Birthright supports with Azura are about his fond memories with Nohr juxtaposing with Azura's abusive childhood and Hoshidans' general sentiment towards Nohra as a country, because the things he sacrificed when choosing Hoshido were his personal attachments. That's why Birthright's plot is an in-universe retread of Corrin's character: an inexperienced, but extremely kind-hearted and trusting prince who believes in the good of others. This is who Corrin was in Nohr, but since he's chosen Hoshido, that facet of his character must be built up with his Hoshidan allies. Why else would his Hoshidan siblings react with surprise and confusion over Corrin's naive choices? They don't know him, and so, Corrin's convictions and morality must be developed in order to have his Hoshidan allies trust his judgment. Otherwise, what was the point in siding with Hoshido? Why sever the bond with your adoptive family when your new allies meet your every decision with resistance and criticism?

Conquest, as many know, asks the opposite question. What's the point in siding with Nohr and your longtime family if Corrin's unable to change how his country operates? Why sacrifice personal morality, in that case? Birthright and Conquest are meant to be opposite but equal journey's for Corrin's character. Corrin wants peace to reign but are they willing to throw away either their ideals or their bonds to do that? Revelation, in the middle, then answers the question with "neither." Corrin doesn't have to sacrfice any part of his character to end conflict (hence why his personal authenticity and ego is challenged the most in Rev). He instead has to see how Nohr and Hoshido's war is senseless at its core and seeks to end it through both ideals and bonds. All three routes are supposed to work as answers to this question of choice.

And this is precisely why Birthright's localization is as bad as it is. Because any and all negative results of Corrin's decision to side with Hoshido are either sanitized or removed entirely, and Corrin's personality was changed from self-critical, sincere, and sensitive to cocky, sarcastic, and quick to criticize everyone else.

When Corrin no longer feels the personal guilt for his decision ripping his Nohrian family apart, or for his decision resulting in the deaths of Flora, Elise, and Xander, you remove the weight that choosing Hoshido is supposed to have. When Corrin is overly critical of the actions and words from Flora, Leo, Camilla, and Xander, as opposed to being sympathetic to their plight as a result of his choice, you instead enforce the idea "well obviously this is the right choice, and Nohr isn't" when none of the choices in that situation is supposed to be absolutely perfect or correct. By changing Birthright in this way, and leaving Conquest and Revelation mostly intact, you weaken the latter two stories. When BR Corrin is proactive, quick to shift blame, and self-assured, CQ Corrin reads as spineless, whiny and pathetic, and RV Corrin reads as wishy washy and self absorbed. What's the point in caring about what stories CQ and RV are trying to tell when the main character is so radically different from BR, and to many people, unappealing? Why else would Birthright be crowned the "only non-terrible story" in Fates, if not for the fact that almost all of the nuance around choosing Hoshido was scrubbed clean and replaced by a generic strongman (not even up to par of other action oriented lords in FE) in a Corrin costume? Birthright is now the "obviously correct" route that's headed by a badass who says fun one liners. What's not to like?

Corrin was written to be a specific character with specific traits: kind, naive, trusting, well defined morals, values personal attachments, quick to question himself, able to sacrifice a part of himself to attain a goal.

Birthright in its original script follows this just fine. Birthright's localized script inadvertently warps and simplifies its main protagonist, and so drags itself and the other two routes' stories down tremendously in the process.

#fire emblem fates #corrin fire emblem #fe14 #rant #fire emblem

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everyones-least-favorite-bard · 10 months

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this is just a collection of highlights from my last Goofy Presentation Night in which i discussed (read: forced my audience to listen to) orv/yhk thoughts for two hundred and ten minutes

ill add more and rb/tag accordingly n stuff later bc its a lot of words to post and i am one very eepy boy

ON DOKSOO

In 1973, Ursula LeGuin wrote the short story The Ones Who Walk Away From Omelas, which, if you’ve been around the English side of ORV fandom for long enough, might recognize due to jomeimei, our yhk scholar’s writings. If you don’t know it, the basic premise of the work is that there exists in some far-flung imagined world, a utopia called Omelas that is perfect in every way, save for the fact that its perfection is maintained via the constant suffering of a small child. (One can surmise from the title of course, that there are those who upon learning this, choose to leave the city and live elsewhere.)

One of the ways this intersects with ORV comes in the Epilogues and what happened to the Avatar of Han Sooyoung living in the 1863rd round. The Han Sooyoung of that round, if you recall, found post-suicide attempt Kim Dokja in the “real” world while looking for the author of Three Ways. Judging by her reactions, we see she has two epiphanies:

EPIPHANY ONE: There was no tls123. It was nearing the end of the year that Three Ways was published (in her and Kim Dokja’s memories), but the novel had not been published yet. The only people with knowledge of the original Three Ways timeline in the world were herself and the Dokkaebi King. If she didn't do anything, if she simply sat back and let the year finish out, she could leave WOS as an unpleasant memory and nothing more. She could save the world.

EPIPHANY TWO: Kim "Three Ways to Survive in a Ruined World saved my life" Dokja would not survive without that story.

She is faced with the same dilemma those who left Omelas were faced with: does she condemn the world to save this child, or does she save the world but condemn this child?

Let's leave that thought to simmer for a while.

Now the moral quandary that she’s dealing with is similar in structure to the Trolley Problem. (Which, if the reader of this has been living blissfully unexposed to 20th century philosophy and 21st century bastardizations of such, is a moral thought experiment in which a tram is headed down a track towards five people, with a lever allowing one to switch the tracks placed before the subject. However, the second track has one person on it who will also surely die from a direct hit by the trolley. Does the subject choose action or inaction?)

And this decision, which, according to other iterations of the Trolley Problem (in which the one person is someone the subject knows and cares about) is still not even in line with those theories or justifications.

ORV is utterly rife with these sort of fun moral messes. There are countless moments in which characters are faced with needs-of-the-many versus needs-of-the-few. Kim Dokja, for one, is perhaps most memorable for these given his propensity for (continuing with the Trolley Problem metaphor) throwing himself onto the track before the tram can reach the fork.

The events of the 1863rd round (and its aftereffects) are the most direct parallel of the experiment.

As has been established, Han Sooyoung of the 1863rd round only knew Kim Dokja for a week, if even that, and yet she is fully willing to burn the world to make sure a life in which he might be happy is given to him. This decision is even further warped when we consider that the moment of her epiphany(s) is not the first time this Han Sooyoung was faced with the Trolley Problem.

We know that (based on the conversations she has with Kim Dokja) in the 1863rd round, Han Sooyoung was operating in a utilitarian space in order to seamlessly complete the scenarios. She chose to sacrifice Yoo Joonghyuk and put him in the position of a “villain” (thereby making him spiritually “dead” to all his loved ones and peers) in order to make sure she made a perfect run. And arguably she did–upon arriving in the 1863rd round Kim Dokja (loathe though he is to admit it) cannot find fault with how she has completed the scenarios thus far, and is even (if I remember correctly) somewhat jealous of her for being able to orchestrate such a clean run.

But instead of working with her to finish her run, to draw the period marking the end of the story she’s made, Kim Dokja’s desire to save Yoo Joonghyuk outweighs his desire to save the world, and he steps in and tears it into a comma. (Yes, I’m deliberately referencing the epilogues. No, I haven’t stopped thinking about the fucking period/comma scene. Don’t talk to me.) He switches the lever back to the track with five people because he refuses to sit back and allow the one man to die.

Now, based on what we see of Han Sooyoung in this round and her immediate reaction to Kim Dokja’s dickery, she would have continued operating in her ends-justify-the-means space. She obviously does to some extent as she reaches the end of the scenarios and wrangles the Dokkaebi King into granting her a wish. Upon arriving in the “real” world she is fully prepared to kill tls123 and save the world. But she doesn’t, she has the key to saving the world in her hands, she could so very easily keep Yoo Joonghyuk from suffering a thousand lives, she could save billions of people and live a wildly successful life as a famous webnovel author but! She! Doesn’t!

Why?

Imagine for a moment, if you will, sitting in a hospital room across from a fifteen year-old boy, sleeping or unconscious, fresh from a suicide attempt. Imagine for a moment, if you will, having met this fifteen year-old boy in another life when he was no longer quite so small or physically close to death, but was equally (if not more) close to it in spirit. Imagine for a moment, if you will, knowing the exact thing that will keep this boy if not happy, then at least surviving, for long enough that you might meet him again. Imagine for a moment, if you will, knowing that withholding that thing is certain death for this boy.

How could she condemn him then? How could she, after knowing the depth with which he will love and will fight to save those he wants to save, leave him here to die, alone?

We see therefore, that as a result of her interaction with Kim Dokja, that she is fundamentally changed in her worldview: she is no longer utilitarianally or unilaterally doling out unambiguous justice, sacrificing Yoo Joonghyuk for the world, but rather sacrificing the world now for Kim Dokja.

It is by this that we know that written into the very condemnation of the world that Kim Dokja uses to justify his consistent self-flagellation is a story of love. Han Sooyoung does not walk away from Omelas--no, she reaches in and says to that lonely, suffering child, I will save you. I will love you as you are. The three ways to survive in a ruined world have always, always been love.

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levi-ackerman-ds · 3 months

Text

The Courier Pt: 2

(My own musing in writing fanfic. Short read, hope you enjoy. SFW in character. Please reblog if you like the story 🙂)

(Part 1: https://www.tumblr.com/levi-ackerman-ds/744117131189305344/the-courier-pt-1?source=share)

As Levi moved through the dark and twisted streets of the Underground, memories from his past surfaced in his mind, the sights and smells flooding his senses with nostalgia and disdain. It had been six long years since he had last set foot in this desolate place, a labyrinth of despair concealed beneath the bustling City Above. Yet, despite time, the Underground retained its haunting familiarity.

The buildings stood as pitiful remnants of a forgotten world throughout this impoverished domain. The once grand structures were now dilapidated and crumbling, their faded facades marred by grime and dirt that have accumulated over the years, snuffing out any sense of brightness. Time and neglect had taken their toll, leaving mildew streaks and moldering decay. The streets were a mosaic of worn cobblestones and dusty earth, traversed only by those who called this forgotten realm home. At irregular intervals, streams of raw sewage cut through the landscape, winding through the cracks in the pavement. His delicate sensibilities clashed with this nauseating reality, his innate need for cleanliness challenged by the unsanitary reality surrounding him.

The stench of unwashed bodies and decay hung heavy in the air, a product of the cramped living conditions and the lack of proper sanitation. The oppressive atmosphere seemed to seep into every pore, an invisible weight that clung to the residents' weary spirits. The people he passed were dressed in tattered rags, their pitiful existence etched into their gaunt faces. Life in the Underground was harsh, devoid of the simplest pleasures. People ignored their surroundings, their eyes downcast as they shuffled along, resigned to the hand they had been dealt. His heart clenched at the sight of the desperate and downtrodden souls he passed. They were trapped in a life situated underneath the surface, a life without sunlight and hope. It was a stark reminder of where he had come from, a reminder of the endless struggle that he had managed to rise above. He remembered the edges of morality he had once teetered on, the lines he had tiptoed across, driven by the need to survive. Levi had been no saint in this forsaken place; he had learned to manipulate, deceive, barter, and even kill to ensure his and his friends' existence. The Underground had shaped him, molding him into a relentless survivor whose choices haunted him even now. The people here deserved the same opportunity to escape the clutches of those who profited from their suffering. It was this empathy that propelled him forward.

Levi weaved through the dimly lit streets of the Underground, his eyes scanning the dark corners and narrow alleyways with precision. Though years had passed since his last visit, his familiarity with the city guided his instincts. He had intimately known these streets once, understood every hidden nook and cranny. He knew the likely streets and hidden alleyways the courier might navigate, his mind working constantly to outmaneuver his target. As he moved, he felt a semblance of his former life resurfacing. The distant sounds of clinking coins and muffled whispers echoed in his mind, harkening back to when survival was a never-ending battle.

When he rounded a dimly lit corner, his sharp eyes caught a glimpse of movement ahead. In the distance was the hooded courier, the figure he had been tracking. The black satchel clung tightly to their side, cradled protectively like a priceless treasure. What could be hidden within that bag to warrant such vigilance? Whatever it was it held the key to exposing the corrupt council member who exploited the suffering citizens of the Underground. It was a faint confirmation of what he had suspected, a secret that someone didn't want to be discovered.

With each step, Levi closed the distance, his silent approach indicating his prowess as a soldier. He calculated his next move, strategizing how to intercept the courier without causing unnecessary alarm. He knew that revealing himself too soon could risk them slipping through his fingers again. Patience and precision were his greatest allies in this dangerous game. But the time for observation and stealth was over; it was now time to confront the figure, to seize the moment and glean the information he sought. As the Underground City whispered its secrets, he aimed to expose the merciless puppeteer pulling the strings.

#attack on titan #levi ackerman #shingeki no kyojin #aot #levi #snk #captain levi #levi fanfiction #levi attack on titan #aot levi #snk levi #levi heichou #levi aot #in character #fanfic #aot fanfiction

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rubyfoxfyre · 3 months

Note

What did you base Alastors Nox Magia off of? Why type of magic is it and where did you get the ideas for a good ass fanfic?

Thank you for the question!

The answer is sort of a long story that I suppose begins with my first exposure to Hazbin Hotel in general, during a particularly doomed D&D campaign where my character basically acted exactly like Charlie did in the pilot:

Granted, Fianna is not anything like Charlie at all, but the DM found it funny enough to send me the gif above and then everyone got distracted for about 5 minutes while they started meming.

The next day I watched the show and was completely hooked!

I started looking into the Wiki to get a greater understanding of the world shown, read the comics (like all 20 pages hahaha), and listened to Addict while working on prompts for Charlastor Week 2022, taking a break from my regular manuscript I'd been working on for a few years (stay tuned for updates soon on that one!). I had about a month so I decided to try my hand at smaller short stories, since some of the authors I idolize are so good at short fiction, and conveying strong emotions in just a few thousand words.

I watched and rewatched the Pilot, studying the characterizations there as well as thinking about funny and unexpected scenarios the characters could get into while dealing with the concept of redemption and how to make it work (needless to say that the fact that they already had it happen was... unexpected. I have thoughts on that but will put a pin in that for now to avoid getting too distracted from your question!).

I can't remember which rewatch it was that I picked up on an interesting exchange between Charlie and Alastor that turned into a whole mess that would consume me to this day:

She tries to put a limitation on his ability to do too much, and I wondered if that could lead to a sort of interesting power-play between them (because in the end this is the part of their relationship that is fundamentally interesting - they're both powerful people with opposing moralities, having to work together to acheive a common goal). Basically, because Charlie's not precise with her language, she ends up basically not controlling Alastor at all. Which works out in its way, because she hides from her deeper wellspring of power with the aid of a gentle persona.

I liked the idea of something deeper between them and within themselves - and with them being opposing forces, I wanted to work with the idea of Alastor being associated with "night" and "dark", versus Charlie being associated with "sunlight" and "rainbows".

Shadow and Flame, only a bit less Lord of the Rings and a bit more sexy.

Nox Magia , the "night" magic, follows basic arcane principles that I've picked up on through the long and involved process of being a massive nerd and reading a lot of stuff.

For writing magic, I like looking at basic logic structures and hovering somewhere between harder and softer magic. My other manuscript that is premiering this year will be discussing some differing types of magic systems as well, if you enjoy reading Riddle and my other works, I hope you enjoy those as well!

But as for the story itself, it wasn't meant to be a story about a man falling in love... it's the story of a man being dragged into love, kicking and screaming about it. 🦌🌈

To Alastor the Hotel is about control, and his experience there is just a game not to be taken too seriously. Charlie is also about control, or rather, trying to find a way to control without breaking everything with her terrible strength.

Alastor embraces his strength, while she hides from it, and he finds that contradictory instinct in her interesting, so he comes up with the idea of a game to teach her some magic that might help her. But as with all magic, intent governs everything (even when you don't realize), and the spells he's teaching are telling a particular kind of story - you can preview what's happening in the chapter titles that have the runes' names! 🍷

❤️ Thanks so much for reading! ❤️

#charlastor #radiobelle #hazbin hotel #charlie x alastor #hazbin hotel alastor #charlie morningstar #riddleofmagic #hazbin hotel charlie #charliexalastor #i will go down with this ship

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