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heart-of-the-morningstar · 2 months

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“Dress Up” Part 2: Second Preview!

Today was a day. Writing makes me feel better. After putting in like 50 applications for a new job, I started writing a little more of my fic. Here's another preview for Part 2 of "Dress Up"

No active warnings for this preview.

And thank you to everyone who's sent me messages, I appreciate it more than you know. I'll keep my head up, promise.

True to his word, Lucifer had managed to sneak away before you woke. After adorning his typical attire, he found himself wandering the halls of the hotel, finally stopping when he reached the lobby. Thinking he was alone, Lucifer started talking to himself and paced back and forth like a madman.

"Was this a mistake? Are we moving too fast? No, no, no it's alright, it's fine! We're fine! Get a fucking GRIP, Lucifer! You're panicking for nothing! She loves you...right? Yes, yes of course she does! Why would she say yes to you?! Unless...NO! No, none of that! Relax! Need to relax..."

"You know, if you don't quit your pacing back and forth, you're gonna wear out the carpet," Husk remarked, attempting to get Lucifer's attention in his anxious state.

"WHAT THE-" Lucifer shrieked hearing the bartender's voice. After seeing Husk standing behind the bar, he breathed out a sigh of relief and clutched his hand to his rapidly beating heart. "Geez, warn a guy next time!" Husk huffed and returned to cleaning the whiskey glass he held in his hand. "How, uhh, how much of that did you hear?"

"Enough to know that you're a fucking mess right now," the cat demon replied, setting down his now clean glass. "Perhaps you need a bartender to talk to."

"Uhh, alright?" Lucifer made his way over to the bar and took a tentative seat on one of the stools.

"This is about your girl, ain't it?" Husk correctly guessed, "about the wedding?" Lucifer sighed and nodded. "Mhmm. You love this gal, don't you?"

"Yes, of course I do!" Lucifer answered almost defensively. "She's...my everything!"

Husk picked up another dirty glass to clean. "And has she given you any reason to doubt that she feels the same way?"

Lucifer huffed. "Well, I...no, no she hasn't. She's always been there for me. Listening to my ramblings, making me laugh, consoling me during the worst times, like last night...she's...she's just perfect!"

"So what's the holdup?" Husk asked after setting the other glass down.

"It's not as simple as you're making it out to be, Husker," Lucifer retorted, pushing his way back from the bar. "I loved Lilith with all of my heart and soul. And she said...that she loved me too. But then one day, she was just gone. Vanished. We fell together. We built a life here TOGETHER! And she just leaves? It's like the last 10,000 years together meant absolutely NOTHING!" Lucifer ran his hands through his hair, trying to keep his composure. "I-I can't lose her like like I lost Lilith. I just can't! I just want to be enough for her. I don't know what I would do if she...", he couldn't finish his sentence. He sat back down at the bar, resting his head in his arms. "The pain would break me..."

The sound of a glass sliding across the counter top caught Lucifer's attention. When he lifted his head, he noticed a full glass of scotch sitting next to him. "Calms the nerves," Husk spoke. Lucifer let out a deep breath and took a swig, choking slightly in the process not realizing how strong it was.

"Not much of a drinker," Lucifer admitted, setting the glass down.

"Sir, if I may..." Husk began.

"You can call me Lucifer," the angel smiled slightly.

Husk smirked. "Lucifer, all I can tell you that love is a vulnerable emotion. I understand that you're afraid. Afraid that history will repeat itself, that your love is not meant to be, and that you're going to end up alone all over again." Lucifer's face sunk, lowering his head against his arms once more. "But," Husk continued, "I know one thing for sure. That girl up there ain't Lilith."

Lucifer raised his head, now hanging onto every word from the bartender.

"If anybody thinks you aren't enough, that's their own fucking problem. And I can tell you that your girl ain't like that at all. She adores ya, can't get her to shut up about ya! Hell, I couldn't even tell you why she ended up down here in the first place! Another one of Heaven's fuck ups, for sure. But for your sake, I'm glad she did." Husk reached over and gulped down Lucifer's unfinished glass of scotch. "Be a shame if it went to waste."

Lucifer let out the smallest of laughs. "Thank you, Husker. And you're right, even in this God forsaken pit, she manages to make it just a little bit brighter. She saved me. And I'm going to devote every moment of my immortal life to her."

"Good to hear. Now..." Husk slammed his hand down on the counter, "get your shit together and go get ready! You got a wedding to attend."

#hazbin hotel #lucifer morningstar #hazbin lucifer #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin husk #hazbin hotel husk #lucifer x reader #lucifer morningstar x reader #lucifer smut #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin hotel smut #preview #my writing #today has been a day #but i like how this part turned out

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roadkillremi · 8 months

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Assistant to the Director

Kinktober, Bonus out of 11

Dilf! Randy X F!Reader

MasterList. Kinktober '23. Uncle Randy list

Summary:You're 25 and just got a starter job as an Assistant to one of Hollywood's biggest Horror Director at the Time, Randy Meeks. You knew he was a survivor of the Ghostface killings but you didn't know how H O T he was. Randy's around 33-37 making this around 2010-2014

Warnings: MINORS DNI, Corruption, Readers a Virgin, Language, P in V, oral (m receiving), praise, slight Degrading, sexual thoughts.

"I apologize! I was trying to find out where I was going!" You quickly explained. He looked down at you with a smile, "It's fine.".

You held your notebook tightly as you walked through the studio. Special effect workers went back and forth on set and to actors. You couldn't help but be amazed by the whole thing. You looked around for an office of sorts, you weren't paying attention when you ran into someone.

It was him. Randy Meeks in the Flesh. The man who single handedly changed Horror. You stared at him for a moment to take him all in.

"I.. Hi! I'm Y/N I was Hired to be your assistant!" You smiled. He nodded, "I thought you were too pretty to be the camera man." He jokes.

"It's great to meet you! So the office is through there! But we usually stay over here. Today's just some takes. Nothing big. I'll have you write down some stuff like if we're missing a prop. And My last assistant should've taught you how to contact anyone." He rambled. You were lost by his blue eyes, how could no one mention how hot he was?

"Uh, yeah. She did!" You smiled. He nodded, "Great, don't worry you are not the assistant to get coffee. I get my own coffee.". He went to sit down his designated chair.

"Can we get an extra Chair!!" He shouted. Someone got a chair and placed it beside him. You sat in the chair and looked at the set.

"What do you think?" He asked. You looked at him, his face was serious. He valued your opinion, "It looks great. A lot of green so I'm assuming run down.". He nodded, "Yeah, this is a take for a zombie movie they have me doing.".

"Why does this place have no zombies?" You looked at him. He paused staring at the set, "Good question.". He looked down at his papers, "It's about 5 miles from the city...so we probably should have some, huh?"

"Maybe" you smiled. He smiled back and walked over to someone. You sat still taking it all in, this was it. A better job with better people, you leaned back and opened your notebook.

"Excuse me? Wheres Meeks?" A blond stared at you. You looked up, "He went that way!". You pointed and smiled, she nodded and studied your features.

"Who are you?" She asked softly. Your stomach knotted, "I'm the new assistant.". She glanced over in Randy's direction, "Good luck.". She walked over to his direction leaving you. You squirmed a bit in your chair feeling weird not doing anything.

Randy sat back down beside you, "So we're gonna do some takes here then we have to go downtown for some different takes.".

"Got it." You smile. He smiled back, "Okay everyone! I need to see some actors in five minutes!" He shouted. You heard people yell back at him. Once the takes began you got to see him work. He leaned back his fingers on his chin. You glanced over noticing the veins on his arms. His beard was trimmed well and his blue eyes studied everything. You sat up and crossed your legs tightly hoping to fight some ungodly urge to jump him.

The day went by shooting scenes. You were in your new office which was besides Randy's. It was late and you typed at your computer looking almost dead. Randy came out of his office with an obnoxious yawn.

"Almost done?" He asked walking over. He sat in front of your desk, "Um, yeah.. just one more thing.". He grinned, "Alright, I didn't want to leave you here all alone.". You nodded with a small smile, "Are you liking your job so far." He tried to make conversation.

"Yeah, it's way better than my last one." You signed out of the computer and stood up stretching.

"Well I was gonna get a cheeseburger. If you wanna join." He offered. You smiled at his awkward attempt to ask you out.

"Id like that." You smiled. He smiled back, "Great, it's on me!".

You parked your car beside his in the parking lot. You got the car locking it, "Ready?" He called out. You nodded walking over to him and went inside. You ordered a Deli sandwich and he got a cheeseburger. You sat in a booth with a big window showing the parking lot.

"So what made you work in the film industry?" He asked before biting into his burger.

"Uh, I wanted to be a director but it's harder for females. So I was told to start from the ground up." You picked up your sandwich. He nodded, "True. But I can't say it's gonna be easier for you. It's a uh, throat to throat business. Like I met John Carpenter and he was threatened by me!" He complained.

"No way!" You exclaimed. He nodded, "Way.". You shook your head biting into your sandwich.

"Did you take film classes or something?" He asked with his mouth full.

"Yeah. I did film theory, screenwriting, special effects. All that stuff." You leaned back into the booth.

"How'd you like it?"

"It was alright. The theory class was about more recent movies. But I prefer older slashers though." You smirked. He pointed at you, "Ah, Good Girl! People need more classic horror movie lovers!". Your heart dropped, good girl, no one's ever called you that. You slightly smiled before taking a bite of your sandwich.

His blue eyes peered into your eyes, "Well I hope you stick around for a good bit. I enjoy your company..". You nodded in agreement, "I hope I can.".

"Well I'll make a deal. Every Thursday I take you to get burgers as long as you stay." He leaned back. You tilted your head to the side, "Do you do this with all your assistants?".

"Only the amusing ones." He smiled. You sighed, "Deal.".

Working with Randy was easy, he'd tell you jokes to keep the day good. He'd get you coffee when he got himself coffee. He'd make sure you were almost done when he left. Thursday nights were even better, you'd try to look nice. He'd pay for dinner and get to know you better. He never pushed or tried to be with you.

Oh but you wish he did. You wished he'd grab you with those muscular hands. The way he'd lick his lips before speaking. Something about him just turned you on in a way no one ever has. You knew it was wrong, he was your boss. But you wish he'd bend you over his desk and just have at it. Instead you just kept it to yourself and wrote notes in your notebook.

It was a late night and you were swamped with emails. The scene didn't go as planned, Randy and you were stuck in the office until ten pm. He slumped out of his office and glanced at you.

"Rough day, huh?"

"Yeah.." you mumbled. You sighed putting your face into your hands.

"You can go home. I got the rest. I'm sure your boyfriend, girlfriend or whatever is gonna be happy to see you." He took a sip of coffee. You glanced up at him, "I uh.. I don't have a partner.".

"Oh. Sorry.. I uh".

"It's fine." You gently sat up to get a better look at him.

"I thought a pretty girl like you was taken."

Oh he's smooth. Your heart skipped a beat. He was nothing like the geek in the stab movies.

"well I wasn't exactly Ms.Popular." you gripped the arms of your seat. Your heart is pounding against your ribs. He smirked, "Me neither. Well goodnight.".

"Goodnight.".

That's when the flirting began, it was subtle. Just compliments here and there. Once you accepted them and subtly flirted back it got more serious. Flowers on your desk, coffee always ready for you. Dinner for more fancy, his hand brushing against yours.

The movie was about to wrap up and you had to prepare for the premieres. You were busy scheduling times and dates for Randy. It was another late night and he shuffled out to the printer. You glanced up at him, his brown hair was a mess. Spikes of it out the side, you looked back at the computer. You bit your lip looking down at yourself.

"Um, if you want I can get take out delivered." You broke the silence. He turned towards you and smiled, "That'd be great.". You opened a drawer with take out menus. The previous assistant left them stating he always would ask for take out.

You grabbed some and brought them to him. He looked over and took them, you smiled and adjusted your dress. Maybe you were too dressed up for your job. But it was just for him, no one else. He'd glance at your chest before quickly looking away.

"Uh, Chinese is fine.. I'll be in my office just.. knock uh.. yeah" he left you alone by the printer. You looked down to see the papers he left. You stood there contemplating to bring them. You grabbed them and slowly opened the door. He sat in his chair almost passed out.

How could someone fall asleep so quick? You placed his papers down and looked at him. You cleared your throat waking him up. He looked at you and jumped, "Sorry!".

"You're fine. Randy I need to talk to you.." you sat down in the chair Infront of his desk. He nodded sitting up, "What's up?".

"I like you... a lot.. but I can't lose this job." You slowly explained. He blinked and slightly grinned, "uh.. I like you as well..". You smiled, "I understand if we can't do Thursday dinners anymore.". He then seemed disappointed, "Oh, I guess not.".

"But what if we did?" He asked. You looked up at him, "Randy.. I don't think you understand..". He looked at you puzzled, you took a deep breath.

"I like you in a sexual way." You cleared up. His eyes widened and face went pink. He leaned back in his chair, "Oh.".

"Yeah.." you looked down embarrassed. He fidgeted slightly, "What if I like you in a sexual way?".

"I.. would I be fired?" You panicked.

"No!" He quickly reassured. You calmed down, "I won't tell anyone." He said softly. You nodded, "I'm sorry.".

"Don't be. We don't have to act on it. We'll just be professional." He leaned back into his chair. Your heart sunk, "What if I don't want to.. keep it professional.". Randy went silent, you dug yourself in a deep hole. You got up and looked down at him.

"I never felt this way for anyone. I just.. I really want to be with you." You whispered. You bit the inside of your cheek hoping he'd agree. He stood up and looked down, "I don't wanna ruin your chances of becoming a director.".

"I understand.." you whisper.

"You're really smart and bright. And I'm just some geek that survived murders from years ago. Besides there has to be someone your age.." he tried to help. You sighed pulling him into a kiss, he slowly grabbed your waist.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asked. You nod, "Yes.. but I..uh before we do..". He studied your face, "What is it?".

"I'm a virgin...I've never.. done anything like this " you softly say. Randy's mouth twitched a bit into a smile. You looked up at him for a sign.

"That's alright.". He leaned closer pushing the back of your legs onto his desk. He pushed all his papers and knick-knacks into the floor. He laid you down on the desk and looked at your body.

"God.. you're so stunning.." he slid his hands up your thighs. Your dressed scrunched up revealing your already soaked underwear. He gave you a toothy smile, "so wet... haven't even done anything..". You felt embarrassed about your lack of experience. He glanced up at your face, "Have you ever.. touched yourself?".

You're face went redder, you slowly shook your head no. You never had a reason to, he bit his lip.

"I can show you.." he whispered. You nodded quickly, he gently grabbed your hand. He placed it on your clothed core, he gently rubbed it in circles. He watched your lips part slightly, he grinned.

"That's it.. it's okay to moan.." he encouraged. You nodded slightly, he slid your underwear off and moved your hand back. He placed his and your middle finger on the entrance.

"It.. may hurt.." he warned. You nodded and hit your lip preparing yourself. He pushed your fingers in taking both of them at once. You tilted your head back letting out an aroused moan. He leaned over your body as he continued to help finger you.

"Mm.. who knew my assistant was such a dirty girl?.. under all those cute clothes and hard work. Just someone who wanted to be fucked." He teased. You whined as you closed your legs around his arm.

"Are you gonna come already?" He asked softly. You weren't sure if you were, you blinked at him. Your stomach was already knotting, your opening throbbing.

"I .. I don't know" you whined. He nodded, "It's alright, you'll know when it's time.". You nodded as you let out a moan. You tilted your head back as a wave of pleasure washed over. He leaned down leaving a trail of kissing on your neck.

You tried to focus on the feeling of him. The feeling of Randy Meeks being on top of you. You wouldn't have guessed the same geek from the movies would be so talented at this. You lifted your legs up to his sides and arched your back. A giant ball of warmth formed, you bit your lip and gripped his desk.

"I think I'm.. I'm gonna.." you tried to form a sentence. He looked up at you and smiled, he entered another one of his fingers and curled them. He listened to your moans echo off his office walls. You shakily brought your legs down and breathed heavily. He stood up taking yours and his fingers out. You brought your hand to your face. The slick juice coated your fingers, you glanced at Randy. Who was licking his fingers off, he looked down at you and smiled. You lazily sat up, "That.. that was great..".

"..oh princess.. we're not done." He studied your face. You looked at him a bit shocked, "What?".

"I'm not done with you.." he leaned close to your face.

"Unless you want to go. Which is fine." He added. You shook your head no, "Please.. continue.". He smiled and unzipped the fly of his jeans. You looked down at them feeling a pool of arousal form. He snickered as he unbuttoned his pants.

"Can you get on your knees for me?" He asked politely. You nodded getting off the desk, your got on your knees looking up at him. He put his hand under your chin, "Ready?".

"Yes..." you whispered. He smiled taking his member out. You stared at it, the tip craved your touch, he craved your touch. He tilted his head down at you, "Know what to do?". You sat there and gently held it.

"My..my mouth?" You asked softly.

"Yes, baby. Your mouth. Can you do that for me?".

You looked down at it, you gave it a little kitten lick. He bit his lip waiting for more. You licked a long strip up before putting it in your mouth. He let out a satisfied sigh as you moved your head. He put his hand on your head to help guide you. He groaned grabbing a bit of hair as he guided you.

His cock hit the back of your throat multiple times, causing you to drool. You gripped his thighs for balance as he began to face fuck you. He pulled your head back sliding his cock out. You looked up at him, cheeks red and face covered in drool. He smiled and helped you up.

"You're doing so well...learning so much hm?" He rubbed your shoulders. You nodded, "Mhm.." you lazily hummed.

"Like what?" He wanted to hear all that he's done.

"How.. how to finger myself.. and how to give a blow job.." you weakly explain. He grinned giving you a kiss, "good girl.".

He sat back in his office chair looking up at your now wrinkled dress. You stood there looking down at him. You felt vulnerable and a bit excited. Randy grabbed your hips sitting you on his lap. He massaged the side of your hip through your dress.

"How are you feeling?" He checked in. You lean towards ur head down to his shoulder.

"Weak ... and tingaly." You breathed. He sighed, "Poor girl .. never got my cock inside of her.". You nuzzled your face into his neck. He smirked, "Do you feel alright to keep going?". You nodded slowly trying to steady your breath. He smirked pulling the rest of your dress off. You let him as if you were a ragdoll leaning back against him. He gently rubbed your back before standing you up. You wobble a bit as you stand he slowly turned you around bending you over.

Your heart raced, your fantasy was happening. Your cheek pressed against the wood, you darted your eyes up at him. He scanned your body running one hand up your back. You took in a shaky breath, he dragged the tip through your folds. You breath hitched up as your hole squeezed around nothing. He chuckled slightly watching it clenched for him.

"Ready?". You closed your eyes amazing the desk was a soft bed. Maybe your fantasy wasn't convenient for this sort of thing. Then again you didn't think Randy would like the idea of this.

"Baby?" He leaned down close to your ear. You opened your eyes, "Mhm..". He stood back up placing his hand in the middle of your back. He pressed in gently helping you adjust. You gasped clenching around him, he let out a low moan.

"you're so tight.." he breathed slowly thrusting into you. You whined feeling his thick length inside you. He picked up the pace pressuring his hand down more.

"So precious... such.. such a good girl.. letting me ruin you like this.." he moaned. You whimpered reaching the edge of the desk. You grasped it holding yourself still for him.

Your thighs burned as he pressed into you. Your brain felt foggy not being able to think of complete words. Just him, the feeling of him taking you. His arms wrapped around hips pulling you up. You leaned back against him trying to hold yourself up.

"Feeling alright?" He whispered. His breath warmed your ear causing you to lean in more. You nodded moaning softly, he slowed down his pace causing you to whimper.

"I think I should stop."

You tightened your grip on his arm and looked up at him. You wanted to say no to beg him to keep going. He raised his eyebrow looking down at you. You parted your lips to try to speak, he thrust into you. He chuckled as your face melted into pleasure. He laid you back on the desk continuing what he started. His grip on your hips burned as he squeezed them.

You choked on your moans feeling overwhelmed. His cock continuously hits your g-spot, he grunt softly.

"I'm.. I'm gonna come inside you. Is that okay?" He moaned. You nodded your mouth flowing with whimpers.

"Gonna make you all mine..." he whispered. You tightened around him feeling your stomach knot.

"Taking me so well... turning you into such a dirty girl..." he grunting releasing himself in you. You whined, your legs shaking beneath him.

"I..I'm gonna.." you tried to form a sentence. He continued at a steady pace leading to you to your orgasm.

"that's it .. just let it happen.." he whispered. You let out a deep breath grasping into the desk tightly. You tried to stand up but wobbled into him. He caught you, "whoa... how about you spend the night at my place?". You nodded and gave him a lazy smile, "Id like that.".

You softly groaned and blinked rapidly trying to adjust to the light. You sat up glancing around the room. There were horror movie posters evenly hung. A dresser with more collectable items from comic books. You looked down at Randy who was fast asleep. You ran your hand through his messy brown hair. He groaned leaning into your touch.

"Good morning" you whispered. He grinned into his pillow, "Morning..". You kissed his forehead laying back down beside him. He reached out for your waist pulling you closer to him.

"Randy?" You whispered.

"Hm?" He buried his face in the crook of your neck.

"Are we... together?" You whispered, your voice shook. He looked at you, "if you want to be.".

"I do. I wanna be with you .." you admitted. He smiled, "good.. we'll just have to keep it a secret. But it seems you're pretty good at that." He grins.

Tag list - @hurlonsororitygirls @sanzumylovee @katie-tibo @horneybeach1

Bonus Jamie Kennedy image -

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mycenalucentipes · 11 months

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You Won't Understand || Draco Malfoy x GN!Reader

Summary: Where, you stumble upon Draco mid breakdown in a secluded part of the library. Draco hisses for you to go away, believing that you’ll never understand his problems. You scoff, saying, “try me”, thus starts a newfound companion.

Word count: ~2.5k

Warnings: Swearing, angst, some comfort towards the end?

a/n: Hi, I just wanted to write a fic in where, the reader also struggles with not being good enough, and finally, maybe, someone will understand what they’re going through. I might’ve self projected all of my worries and trauma from my high school days lol. There's a longer explanation for that at the end if anyone wants to read xD

But anyways, please enjoy

A deep sigh escaped your lips as you made your way to the library. It was lunchtime, and you were supposed to be in the Great Hall with your friends. However, earlier that day, you received a Howler from your mother.

“Y/N L/N. YOU HAVE BEEN SLACKING OFF IN YOUR STUDIES AGAIN HAVEN’T YOU!? YOU ONLY RECEIVED AN EXCEEDS EXPECTATIONS ON YOUR LAST EXAM. HOW COULD YOU!? DON’T EXPECT TO COME HOME WITH THOSE GRADES. IF YOU RECEIVE ANYTHING LESS THAN AN OUTSTANDING ON THE REST OF YOUR EXAMS, DON’T EVEN BOTHER COMING HOME.”

Thankfully you were in the privacy of your dorm room when you received this. Everyone had already left for the day. Your mother, a proud Ravenclaw, was deeply ashamed that you were sorted into the Slytherin house instead of hers. So to compensate, she relentlessly tortured you to always achieve the highest marks possible. After graduating Hogwarts, she attended the University of Oxford and ended up working for a different prestigious university as a researcher in neurology.

Your father on the other hand was not a wizard. He was a muggle that your mother had fallen in love with while she attended regular university. He was also a neurologist, a man of science. He despised the magic part of you. It was a rude awakening when you got your letter from Hogwarts and your mother had to explain everything about her world. She fought him hard and long to send you to Hogwarts, so you couldn’t completely despise her. However, since they both wanted the best of their worlds for you, their expectations were too high in the sky for a mere sixteen-year old. Your father wanted you to attend the most prestigious university for med school while your mother just wanted you to be the top of your class. She figured you could become a healer at St. Mungo's or gain a high position in the Ministry of Magi. (She might be trying to live vicariously through you, as she gave up any jobs involving magic.)

As a result, you weren’t sure what you wanted anymore. For now, since you and your father weren’t exactly on speaking terms, your mother was the only one who even seemed to care. Thus, you focused all of your attention on your studies within the past month. Often skipping meals or falling asleep during them. Your friends began noticing the toll it took on you–your face grew paler and more tired, your hands shook, and dark circles formed under your eyes from countless all-nighters. Needless to say, you were incredibly freaked out for your next exam.

If you didn’t receive an Outstanding, you would not have anywhere to go for the summer. Maybe you could spend it with the Weasleys? You managed to befriend Ginny, Fred, and George. Ron was a little harder to get him to come around, just because you were a Slytherin.

On your way to the library, you nearly ran head first into Ginny. Oh, how coincidental. Before you even had a chance to apologise, she started rambling.

“Oh hey, Y/n! I was just looking for you, I haven’t seen you at any meals today,” She said with worry evident on her face, “Are you alright? Please, come back to lunch with me. I miss you, Y/n. We're all worried about you.” You cast her a guilt-ridden look.

“I’m just heading to the library. I need to perfect my knowledge for the next exam,” You sighed defeatedly with a small chuckle.

“But, Y/n–” Ginny began, concern lacing her voice. This time, you wore an apologetic expression.

“I’m sorry Ginny, I just can’t. I–uhm, can I ask a favour from you though?” Avoiding eye contact out of shame, you looked away, unable to hold her gaze any longer.

“Of course Y/n, anything.” Ginny reached out and rubbed your arm in an attempt to comfort you.

You let out a heavy sigh. “Could I possibly stay at your place over the summer?” You hung your head down, eyes filled with unshed tears. You couldn’t bring yourself to meet Ginny’s gaze. “My mother owled me to say: If you don’t get O’s on the rest of your exams, don’t even think about coming home, child!” Ginny gasped softly, eyes widening at the words that stammered out of your mouth.

“Oh, Y/n, of course you can stay with us. I'm sure you'll be alright, but you're always welcome to stay with us,” She replied, her voice brimming with sympathy. You gave a short nod of thanks, unable to speak or your tears would escape your eyes. “I suppose I’ll see you later then? Please, come to dinner at least.” You once again nodded, giving her a small smile. She smiled back as well, then turned and left you once again.

You let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. The exhaustion and tiredness from it all was creeping in, eating away at you slowly.

You were so tired. When would it get better? When would it end?

As you entered the library, your eyes scanned the endless rows of books, searching for a quiet place to study. That’s when you noticed a figure hunch in a cushioned chair by a window, their shoulders shaking and trembling.

It was Draco Malfoy. A boy that you weren’t really on any terms with. Occasional waves from you and small nods from him were the extent of your communication.

Forgetting about your own woes for a moment, you cautiously approached him, uncertain if he would react kindly to your presence. Once you were about five feet away from him, his head snapped up. Then you saw his face. Tears pooled out of his eyes every few seconds, his lips trembled, then his brows narrowed.

“What are you doing here?” Draco spat out, his voice a little hoarse.

You hesitated for a moment, taking in the situation you just landed yourself in. Despite the venomous sounding tone, you could detect that he really hadn’t meant it that way. Ignoring his question, you stepped closer, concern etched on your own features.

“Are you alright?” You asked softly, your voice filled with genuine worry, “I–Is there anything I can do?”

Draco averted his gaze, trying to hide the pain and tears in his eyes. “It’s nothing. Just go away, please. You wouldn’t understand,” he muttered, his voice laced with frustration. You narrowed your eyes at this.

“Oh, I wouldn’t? Why, because I’m not a pureblood? Because I 'don’t have any expectations placed onto me'? Hmm?” You retorted back, unsure why you spat back such a defensive response. He looked slightly taken aback at your words.

“Yes, precisely. Wow, you're so smart,” his voice dripping with sarcasm, he rolled his eyes, then slumped back in the chair.

You folded your arms. “Try me, then. I won’t tell anyone, I swear it," you challenged him, not budging.

He narrowed his eyes at you once again, unsure if he should open up. After a moment of internal struggle, he sighed with defeat. “If you really must know, There’s just–just so many expectations weighing on me. If I’m not good enough, it will be a disaster for my parents and me. I don’t want to risk anything, and the pressure is so... suffocating. I feel like I’m losing my mind,” he reluctantly started, but soon couldn’t stop, he didn’t know why he was sharing all of this with some random classmate.

“I’m not good enough for him. I don’t even feel that I’m good enough for my parents. My father always says: Malfoys do this, Malfoys don’t do that. Then my mother is already trying to arrange a marriage for me. I wish everyone’s expectations of me would just disappear.”

“But how would you ever understand that type of pressure?” He sighed in frustration as you just nodded along. muttered quietly, but you still heard him.

You didn't know who 'he' was, but you sure as fuck knew about pressure from parents.

“Sorry to interrupt your little pity party, Malfoy,” you sighed, meeting his glare with a calm gaze. “But let me tell you, I do understand the feelings of pressure and not being good enough for someone. I’m going to get kicked out of my home by my mother if I don’t get Outstandings on every single last assignment. She's dead serious about that. My father and I aren’t on speaking terms because he thinks being magical is stupid. He wants me to attend muggle medicine university. My mother shames me everyday for being in Slytherin and not her perfect little Ravenclaw house. They both expect me to do what they want without giving me a choice. If I’m not their perfect little daughter, I’ll just get shunned and kicked out. Disowned. I'm just their disappointment,” you rambled out, “but I suppose this little talk shouldn’t be about me. Sorry, didn't mean to spin it like that. Just forget it.”

Maybe your family's reputation wasn't as important as the Malfoys, but nonetheless, you were sure you would become disowned by them. They had set unrealistic expectations out of you. Your mental health was rapidly declining, if it hadn’t already hit rock bottom, your feelings were valid and you won’t let anyone tell you otherwise. However, your parents didn’t seem to care about your feelings.

"I definitely know how it feels. Like someone is drowning or suffocating you. There's no breaks. And it's all ridiculous because we are just teenagers. So what the fuck, life?" You angrily whisper out.

Draco stared at you, momentarily speechless. “I… I had no idea,” he murmured out, “it seems you are capable of understanding this more than I thought.” You mirrored the speechlessness, unsure if you should be insulted or relieved by his admission. He looked away from you, staring out the window for a brief moment.

“It’s alright, Draco. No one really notices anyways,” you laugh awkwardly, trying to brush your feelings away again. Even though you pushed for Draco to share his feelings, you felt like a burden doing the same thing.

You went to approach him, stepping into the rays of sunlight that beamed in from the windows. It wasn’t until now that Draco took in your full appearance. He never paid you much mind, as you weren’t a pureblood or in his friend group, but friends with the Weasleys. You truly were a beauty. You had godly features that rivalled any of the most attractive students. Your hair cascaded softly around your face, accentuating your facial features. It was also then, he realised just how malnourished and exhausted you were looking. The sunken eyes, pale face, bloodshot eyes and slightly trembling form. He was sure a gust of wind would knock you over.

“You look like shit, L/n.” Draco said flatly, instantly realising the bluntness of his comment. Your eyes widened at his comment.

“I–I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.” He apologised? Who was this imposter and what did he do with Draco Malfoy?

“Gee, thanks. It’s nothing I can’t handle though.” You rolled your eyes, a small laugh escaped your lips. Attempting to brush his concern off and divert the attention away from yourself, you shot back, “Have you seen yourself though? I could say the same.” Draco just shook his head with amusement on his face.

“Yeah, yeah. But, it’s clearly not ‘nothing’. A gust of wind could knock you over,” he retorted back, though his gaze softened. You scoffed at him. He couldn’t explain why he suddenly cared, why he wanted to reach out to you. Maybe it was because you made him feel calmer? The gentle aura you carried around when others were there was relaxing and a good change of pace. Maybe it was the fact that you also shared the same feelings of struggle as him. Not being accepted or feeling good enough for everyone. You tried to help him (in your own challenging way), now he wanted to help you, at least just a little.

You hummed a little, shying away a little for the first time. “Well, perhaps we could both use a break from trying to meet everyone’s expectations. Maybe we can help each other out,” you suggest, “though I don’t know how to help out with the whole pureblood traditions thing, I’ll be around for you if you need some support. Or just a friend to hangout with or vent to.” Draco nodded along with your plan, not feeling too opposed to this.

“And I can help you with your studies,” he offered with a soft tone. You nodded as well, giving a genuine smile this time.

+==+==+

Over the next few weeks, you and Draco spent more and more time together. Sometimes it would be hardcore study sessions. Where it felt like the questions he quizzed you on were never ending. Other times, it would be ranting about everything and nothing. It helped both of you get some weight off your chests. A couple times, you took trips to Hogsmeade to chat over a butterbeer or three.

You could say it was a friendship. You weren’t sure how he felt, but you could feel yourself falling for the Slytherin boy. Though you knew it might not end well, with him being a ‘pureblood’ and all. Such bullshit that is. You often told him that was your opinion on the pureblood traditions, he would just chuckle, sadness laced in it occasionally.

“Y/n, how do you feel about your grades?” Draco asked casually as you both walked down an empty hallway. Your face paled and your body froze in your steps. The feeling always haunted you, no matter how much you talked it over, it would still haunt you. Draco came to a halt and turned towards you, voice laced with genuine worry, “Y/n?” He could see the inner turmoil your brain shoved you into, and it pained him more than it should have to see you like this.

You tried to shake yourself out of anxiety’s grip. “I’m not too sure to be honest. I’m waiting on three exams and two homework grades still…,” you trailed off, drowning in your worries again.

“Hey, hey, you’ll be ok, alright?” He said with a much softer tone while placing his hands on your arms. Over the weeks, you both became immaculate at reading each other’s signs of worry or anxiety, knowing exactly what to do.

“You don’t know that, Draco,” you sighed, “although, maybe staying with the Weasleys would be better for my mental health anyways.” At this thought, you felt a little more relieved, but no matter how much you tried not to care, these feelings would forever haunt you.

“A–anyways, how about you? How’s your whole… family thing?” You asked, deflecting any more concern that came your way.

“It’s uh… still not great. Mother called off any preset engagements, however she still wants me to at least try going on the dates.” He grumbled. It was a little progress. You encouraged him to express his feelings with his mother, maybe it would change her mind. You knew it was a long shot to be able to change the traditions of hundreds of years, but why not try now?

“Oh! Well, I suppose that’s… a little good then?” You tilted your head a little, becoming lost in thoughts again. You wondered if her mind would ever change enough to let you potentially date Draco. No, you haven’t confessed anything to Draco, but your feelings weren’t dying.

Draco scrunched his nose and gave a slight nod. “Yes, I suppose so. Maybe, someday, she’ll let me date whoever I want, without worrying about blood status…” Your eyes widened, a blush spreading across your cheeks and to your ears.

“That would be nice, wouldn’t it?” You stammered out. You didn’t want to get your hopes up, but you could’ve sworn that was implying he wanted to date you. Little did you know, you were correct. Maybe someday it would work out, but for now, both of you were content with your ever growing friendship. Though, can you really call this a friendship? You were sure it dug deeper than just that.

looong a/n: So, I might’ve self projected all of my worries and trauma from my highschool days. I went to a public hs, but good god, the standards were high. Anything less than an A was a failure. I had friends crying over 94%’s… I had a couple friends that would get locked out of their houses for the day if they brought home C’s. I, myself, never felt smart enough either. My friends always scored higher than me.

I maintained a solid 3.8 GPA, but it just wasn’t as high as my friends’ with their 3.9’s and 4.0’s :’). So I spent my whole grade school career, never feeling smart enough. I cried myself to sleep most nights from the stress of it all. My parents would get onto me and had really high expectations for me as well. It took my dad forever to realise I'm going to sometimes get C's because some subjects just don't click and I crumble under pressure. No matter how hard I study, I cannot always get A's. That should be okay, but my parents....hhhhh. It’s taken me a little bit of time to start undoing the feeling that if I don't get A’s, I’m a failure.

Though, I’m finally realising that grades aren’t everything in life, and it’s ok. I’ll still aim for the top, but I’m not sacrificing my mental health for it again. (I still have a 3.8GPA at uni, but now I’m studying smarter ;) and uni has been slightly easier than high school, wtf.) I’m not trying to sound stuck up or snobby, I promise and I apologise. That was just the school mindset I was raised in. In which, I’m trying to undo some of those more painful mindsets.

I’m trying to learn that my efforts are enough. I’m putting my best work in while not sacrificing my sanity this time. I’m enough, you’re enough, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.

Thanks for reading if you did!

#draco malfoy x reader #draco x reader #nicosnwrites #draco malfoy #draco malfoy x slytherin!reader #draco malfoy x gn! reader #your mental health matters so don't let anyone tell you otherwise #malfoy x reader

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sanriokamabodo · 11 months

Text

college!bf douma

A/N: im struggling w writers block + had a heavy day so i decided to write smth i conjured up instead of a request!i will be back in business soon my sweets!heehee<3 if y'all want a part two feel free to ask djdjd

CW's: hes kinda sleazy in the beginning, reader sucks at math. suggestive themes>:) douma is goth in my college au bc i said so. the day i proofread is the day i die!

A psychology major with a minor in religious studies. Doesn't practice any religion himself but finds the subject interesting nevertheless.

Barely studies but somehow manages to pass with flying colours.

That one hookup you regret with all your might, let me elaborate;

Douma tutors math and it's no coincidence he slept with majority of the people he tutored.

No, you're not an exception. Cute try though!

Something about Douma's piercings, his choppy hair that he probably cut himself and his 'don't give a fuck' attitude managed to dissolve your IQ and last bit of self respect around him.

He knows how to give you just enough attention to keep you interested, but little enough for you to purposely screw up your math tests for an excuse to see him.

Yes, he mocked your intelligence by asking if rats ate your brain or whether you were just born this stupid, but the way he ruffled your hair as he fake-pouted at you made something bubble in your stomach.

It's no surprise you ended up with Douma in the men's restroom, a hand smacked tightly over your mouth that day.

You weren't allowed to ride the high of having hooked up with the hottest guy on campus for long.

Throughout the night you were bombarded with messages from your friends, all of them being about Douma. Why didn't you tell them? Was he good? ... Was he big?

You thought your heart was going to thump out of your chest. Sweaty hands refreshing the messages five, ten, twenty times.

This had to be a sick joke, right? Was this Douma's true nature?

About to throw your phone away in defeat, it vibrated once more. You didn't want to look but curiousity got the better of you.

[Douma, 11:06]: I think we need to talk.

Your chest thundered with anger at the message.

[Y/n, 11:07]: You think!?

[Douma, 11.07]: I know you don't owe me anything, but can we please meet somewhere?

[Y/n, 11.08]: I don't feel like showing my face today, thanks:)

We're you being dramatic? Maybe a little. But you were an introverted person. Being known by everyone on campus wasn't on your to-do list, and the reason why just made it that much worse.

[Douma, 11.08]: Text me your adress, I'm coming over.

[Y/n, 11.09]: No.

[Douma, 11.10]: Please, give me a chance to set things straight. I'll fix it, I promise.

You pondered for a moment. Fuck it, what's the worst that could happen? You texted him the address of your dorm and within an hour you heard a knock on your door.

Opening the door Douma stood on your doorstep, looking rather apologetic. You waved him inside, a thankful smile grazed his lips.

"I like what you did with the place."

"Shut up."

"Fair enough." He nodded.

"So..?"

"I did tell my friends we hooked up." He said, making you scoff. He threw his hands up defensively, before you could say anything.

"But! But! I didn't want them to tell everybody else..! They know I like you... a lot."

A small blush across up your cheeks at the sudden confession.

"You like me?"

Now you've done it, Douma started rambling.

"I get really fucking dumb about crushes. I wanted to text you all the time but I didn't want to come across as creepy. I thought we could just... hook up and I would forget about my stupid little crush and of course it just made me like you even more, because c'mon you're hot as fuck." He sighs pinching the bridge of his nose dramatically. "So what I'm trying to say here is that I would really like to make it up to you because I'm really fucking sorry and I would also really, really like to take you on a date and have a fresh start, please?" A shy smile painted his features.

You laughed. You were stupid if you were to deny him like this, especially considering you really liked him too.

"I'd love to go on a date with you."

#wow i .. actually ... kinda like how this turned out?#demon slayer #kimetsu no yaiba #anime #kny #demon slayer fluff #douma #douma headcanons #douma x reader #douma imagine

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writingquestionsanswered · 6 months

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Hello! Do you have any advice on how to deal with the fear of bad-faith readers? Thanks to spending too much time online during Covid, my confidence took a huge hit, and now I’m quite worried about random online users discovering my writing and complaining that my writing is not good enough, not diverse enough, not social justicey enough, etc. It’s often made me hesitate a lot during my writing recently, so any advice to deal with this would be much appreciated. Thank you!

Fear of Negative Feedback/Reviews

Three things to keep in mind here:

#1 Reviews and comments aren't feedback. Unless you post your story to a place dedicated to writer feedback or where you're specifically asking for feedback, any commentary or review you receive is not there to educate you. It's either there as thanks and/or flattery, or it's there to let other readers know what to expect. On sites like AO3, for example, unless you specifically ask for concrit, you will probably only get neutral or positive commentary which isn't feedback. If you get negative comments, just ignore them if you didn't ask for them.

#2 Reviews are for readers. Let me say that again...

Reviews are for readers to let other readers know what they liked and didn't like about a book. They are not there for the author's harm or benefit. They're not there to educate the author. They're there for other readers, full stop.

Write the best story you can write, and if you can, utilize feedback tools meant for writers (alpha readers, writing groups, critique partners, sensitivity readers, beta readers, editors...) to ensure your story is everything you want it to be.

If your alpha readers, writing groups, critique partner/s, sensitivity readers, beta readers, or editors have concerns about representation in your story, those are the issues you need to address.

Once your story is out in the world, let it go, especially if negative reviews hurt your confidence and mental health. If you inadvertently do something terrible that blows up, listen, apologize, and take steps to do better next time. That's it.

#3 Everyone isn't going to love your story. All writers get bad reviews. If you expect to receive only glowing praise on every story, you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

Don Quixote by Miguel de Cervantes is a beloved classic that has sold an estimated 500 million copies worldwide since it was first published in 1605. Among the reviews on Amazon: "repetitive and frustrating," "book is trash, don't know why it's a classic," "I absolutely hated this book," "silly, lengthy, display of low humor."

A Tale of Two Cities by Charles Dickens is another beloved classic, and it has sold an estimated 200 million copies worldwide since publication in 1859. Among the reviews on Amazon: "boring as heck," "incomprehensible jibberish," "has significant flaws," "great if you want a nice nap," "way too slow and boring."

The Hobbit by J.R.R. Tolkien is a classic that is still very popular and beloved today, and has sold an estimated 100 million copies since its publication in 1937. Among the reviews on Amazon: "very slow paced and confusing," "I found it mind-numbingly dull," "the worst piece of writing ever," "zoned out because I was bored."

The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown is a hugely popular contemporary book that has sold an estimated 80-million copies worldwide since its publication in 2003. Among the reviews on Amazon: "One of the worst, if not THE worst book I've read, ever," "much ado about not much," "couldn't overlook the shallow characters, boring car chases, and general lack of quality," "unnecessary ramblings about scenery," "horribly written, full of cliches."

All stories have people who don't like them. Period.

It's something we have to accept as writers.

As long as we're doing our best to put the best possible stories out there, and as long as we listen and learn when legitimate concerns are brought to our doorstep, we're doing all we can.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

I’ve been writing seriously for over 30 years and love to share what I’ve learned. Have a writing question? My inbox is always open!

LEARN MORE about WQA

SEE MY ask policies

VISIT MY Master List of Top Posts

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#writing tips #writing help #wqaadvice

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redbreastedbird · 2 months

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hello oh my goodness you're on tumblr 😭😭😭I don't really know how to convey how HAPPY your books make me feel. I re-read mmu books one through five for christmas and I intend to re-read the rest before mua three is out!

arkjdmsb I don't even know what to say except a huge big massive THANK YOU for creating this amazing universe where anyone and everyone can be gay and solve crimes. nuala holds a special place in my heart as we're both bespectacled autisic irish people. every time she speaks irish I gain like three years of life expectancy. I love hazel to pieces as well. when I was younger, she felt like a friend to me, like I had just accidentally picked up her casebooks and solving crimes alongside her and daisy (and of course the junior pinkertons!)

I will never forget reading the last chapter of the body in the blitz and coming to the realisation that like. almost everyone in this room is queer. and this is a kids book in an era of draconian book-banning legislation, and there are just queer characters right there. just being people, really really good people, existing almost a hundred years ago. neurodivergent, poc, disabled, queer and trans characters. yes!

I am just rambling oh my god 🤦love you lots and keep up the incredible, ground-breaking, joyous work <3

This is so nice?! Thank you so so much. And yes, this is everything I wanted to do with my books.

Sarah Waters has a line about how she writes historical novels about queer women because she wants to show her readers that queer women have always existed, and I really internalised that. It matters so much to be able to show that none of this is new - that humans have always been every identity they are today, it’s just that mainstream culture never wanted to admit it. I’m trying to put the reality back into history - honestly, I’ve probably underestimated the diversity, if anything.

I know I have said this a lot, but I grew up under section 28 in the UK, in a time when you basically could not show queer characters in a children’s book (the only queer characters I remember seeing were the angels in His Dark Materials), and so it took me a long time to really trust that I was allowed to put queer characters in my own books. Making Daisy on the page queer was one of the scariest things I had ever done, and I still sort of cannot believe I did it. But it means so much to me to just be able to put on the page now that oh, George has a boyfriend now, and for it to be a basically unremarkable thing. And also to create a trans character with Anna, who transitioned before the novel and is now just living her life!

I really hope that there’s a generation of authors coming up now who have grown up with books like mine and who will do this kind of thing even more readily than I have been able to. The world is such a scary place for people who don’t fit into the norm, but there are so many of us, just out there living our lives, and books help us see that.

Long story short: be gay solve crimes. ❤️

#murder most unladylike #ministry of unladylike activity #the body in the blitz #Sarah waters #section 28

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anincompletelist · 5 months

Text

six sentence sunday :D

OH BOY I AM SO LATE TO THIS TODAY! thank you to @getmehighonmagic @kiwiana-writes @firenati0n @ninzied @sparklepocalypse @magicandarchery @affectionatelyrs YA'LL ARE AMAZING AS PER USUAL !!!!! I loved reading everything ya'll had to share :')

okay this snippet goes out to @firenati0n I adore you and probably would not already have 5k of this silly little random new wip already written if it weren't for our late night yelling over discord kshdkjsdh <3 (I owe you my LIFE for coming up with the usernames omg)

so here's a bit of what I guess we're calling the anonymous server fic?? enjoy!

EarlGreyEnthusiast: Your ability to separate a single thought into nine different messages is quite impressive, but I can’t say I’m surprised given your handle. I’m honored you think I’m both wise and nice. EarlGreyEnthusiast: I’m very sorry to hear that you had a ‘supremely awful’ day. Would you like to talk about it? quadespressolover: yes quadespressolover: pls quadespressolover: but like quadespressolover: only if u have the time. quadespressolover: i don’t wanna be annoying and i tend to ramble [ EarlGreyEnthusiast is typing… ] EarlGreyEnthusiast: I have time.

OPEN TAG to anyone who has not done this already, but also -- @daisymae-12 @read-and-write- @nocoastposts @wordsofhoneydew @happiness-of-the-pursuit @inexplicablymine @firstsprinces @littlemisskittentoes @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @zwiazdziarka @iboatedhere @eusuntgratie

I''m a little bit scattered today so I apologize if I tagged you and you've already posted, please let me know if that's the case so I can go read!!

I hope everyone's having a wonderful weekend and doing well! :D

#wips #rwrb #red white and royal blue #rwrb fic

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netherworldpost · 7 months

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TRICK OR TREAT

A small box, purple and ribboned green. Inside are things, pleasant yet not yet seen.

Dreams, maybe, of places yet visited -- or places visited yet not yet returned to, in quite some time.

Wrapped in woodsmoke, that pleasant, and a leaf -- no, two -- it has been a good year, let us celebrate this success with harmless excess.

rambling ->

This will (probably) be the only trick or treat I respond to this year. You're the first! That's the bad news, that I'll probably only write one of these this year.

The good news (in active progress all season) is that I'm working on a whole system of them.

<- rambling / making sense ->

In 2014, I ran a promo on Evil Supply Co. where folks were invited to write in "trick or treat" and I would come up with a unique ramble (as above) for them.

Just for them. A gift of text. No duplicates. Each wildly different. How was that so long ago question mark exclamation mark.

I peaked into whatever information they provided to write something specifically customized for them using all of my powers of deduction (i.e. reading + skill as a storyteller) TO WRITE A TINY ***CUSTOM MYTH*** FOR THEM

(see above) (for yours) (enjoy!)

Answered LOTS.

It ended up being dozens. I don't think it was actually 364, but I do believe I ended up doing a few hundred, but. Y'know. Gif. Can't pass it up.

Tons of fun.

Tons of work!

Tons of fun though.

"I think you might have said something about a plan?" you might be wondering.

I don't know you and I don't know how familiar you are with my work and I'm guessing this is just a fun ask without prompting.

However.

I never let a chance to ramble go to waste.

Netherworld Post Office is being built as "an independent media company".

Fancy words.

Means we do lots of stuff.

Right now we're making myths for back office clients.

We're building a front office shop. Cards and stickers and zines.

That's two of the "lots of stuff."

A third of the "lots of stuff" is a continual "trick or treat" blog.

I'll run through some logistics quickly. You didn't ask for any of this part but this is the trick to the treat.

The Trick or Treat blog will be a public archive. Some things I'll just write because the blog'll need some stuff to get going and keep going.

But sometimes there will be a "trick or treat!" shop entry. Limited quantity. Available until sold out. One per customer. Working out the details. Randomly during the year it'll come back in stock until it's out of stock again.

If you snag one, it is $0.00 with $0.00 shipping and handling. Anywhere in the world. Trick or treats are free!

I'll write a tiny myth like the above.

It'll get printed on a card.

We cover the printing and the postage.

It'll get mailed to you. Wherever you are in the world!

Tiny postcard print.

Written just for you.

Mailed to just to you. For free! Anywhere in the world!

Trick or treat!

Via the mail!

You caught me in a late night business session and I had a solid amount of sleep today for the first time in weeks and so I Am Full of Energy.

Enjoy your treat!

I've carved off the launch date because (uncomfortable laughter) the problems we thought we had solved were solved but they weren't the only problems lurking.

It's fine.

That's business.

I'm smart and I've added even smarter folks helping me figure out the complex problems.

netherworldpost.com has the mailing list if you're thinking "huh I like the idea of receiving a launch email sometime when this all sets up."

I've overstayed my welcome in answering this ask, so I'll see myself out after a big "Happy Halloween!" to everyone

(or small I guess, text size is structured for reading)

(and we're in a small text section)

(...wrapping up...)

Thanks for this space.

The Trick or Treat blog is in active idea-ation-stage-ization because it is October and the October Energy is Rampant so we're grabbing it while we can to figure out this very October thing.

This gif selection is reminding me I am due for a witch hair appointment

Paying that bill requires cash (fair and good and fine)

And remembering "oh stones, money exists"

means remembering "oh bones, I gotta market this machine lest it devolve into An Ungodly Expensive Hobby"

that URL for email signup

one last time

netherworldpost.com

(I am actively reducing coffee intake and increasing sleep intake and my schedule has coincided with "tonight is a coffee night" + "today was a heavy sleep day" and your ask came in on "I am planning a big project")

(let this be a joyous warning to folks who ask me things)

(I MAY ANSWER) (IT WILL BE LONG) (IT MIGHT NOT MAKE SENSE)

#october 31 #autumn blog #october #halloween #snail mail #autumn blogs #autumn snail mail #halloween snail mail

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avocado-frog · 2 years

Text

So in my head, forget me not (first book) is the prologue, dahlia (second book) is the main story, and hyacinth (third book) is the epilogue

#irrelevant #original work #isaac says things related to his writing again #i've been using that tag a lot today lmao sorry #we're rambling about my writing today everyone

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31nightshade · 3 months

Text

Hello Google pngs.

Here is a philza Minecraft quote from 2023

" I put my hole philussy into that"

Now time to ramble about everything.

So like you guys get the baseline of what's going on but you don't even have the tip of the iceberg only one person dose.

So here's the tip of the iceberg.

Today we're going to discuss spreen and Missa and a tid bit about roier. Their dynamic, their characters and everything and how it impact the story. @universallytravelerpirate why do I always end up rambling to you lol.

Spreen, roier and Missa grew up together. Roier and Missa being blood brothers and spreen had no blood connection to them but they loved each other like brothers.

Missa and Spreen bonded over the music they played together, sang together, and taught each other things they learned. It was no surprise when Missa came back from the UK to study they would start playing music together again. But Spreen felt more greedy but Missa brushed it off, and everyone changed a little bit. So they entered music competitions events anything music-related for the most part.

Phil bye Missa's side until he couldn't anymore Phil started a photography business and he was working hard to keep it on his feet he couldn't go on these trips as much as he wanted to. Of course, missa understood they spent one more night together before Phil would go. In the morning he helped Phil make sure he got everything walked him to the train and sent him off with a kiss and a promise to send letters. After this spreen mood felt happier? Missa's attention was only on writing music and practicing.

Missa was happy that he got to play music beside his best friend but he started to miss home Miss Phil. Spreen brushed It off or cut him off before he could go spiraling and change the subject about music what lyrics they were writing and where they would go next. missa got a letter from Phil one day that they were expecting! He was overwhelmed with joy wanting to get home as soon as he could only for Spreen to remind and pressure him about the shows and competitions they had planned.

Missa started to burn out his drive to play music to write music was slowly fizzling out competition at the competition show after show it was draining he missed his home so he made the final decision to he would take a break. He and Spreen got into it after hours of going back and forth and then Spreen offered a drink. Missa regrets taking it. He took the drink as a sign of no ill will he felt fine at first he packed his bags before he went out the door spreen offered to walk him to the train. Only for him to collapse.

That was a ball tell me what you guys think I hope you liked it :) if you guys have any suggestions I will eat them.

#pissa #qsmp missa #qsmp philza #philza #qsmp #q!missa #philza minecraft #death duo #deathduo #qsmp spreen #qsmp au #qsmp roier #nights au

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prettyboyrry · 1 year

Text

hi!! this is my first little piece of writing for TLOU (in abby’s perspective) i’m putting on here kind of nervous but here it is :) hope you enjoy and feel free to message me if you have request or things you didn’t particularly like about it i’m always up for suggestions!

————————————————————————

"i- well, never"

“what?”

her face goes bright red at her confession.

me and my girlfriend, of only 2 weeks were going back and forth asking questions about each other when we ventured off into the more personal side of things. i had asked her how many times she gets off a day when she answered this.

"um, i don't know i just never really learned how to," her face is downcast while she fiddles with her fingers.

"let me get this straight" i can't help my teasing tone of voice, "you've never touched yourself?"

she clears her throat before speaking, still not making eye contact.

“n-no"

"sweetheart why are you so nervous?" i laugh, "this is not a bad thing at all"

"i know," she finally musters up the courage to look at me "but like i've never done anything to myself, much less anyone else so this is all really new, and you're so experienced and have been with other girls who are more experienced than me. and i wanna be able to make you feel good but i'm not sure how, i'm sorry i'm rambling"

my god she is cute.

"which is why we're gonna explore this together." i reassure her, "yes, i've been with a few girls but every girl is different and not everyone likes the same things so we're both going to be learning each other's bodies and that's okay.

she yelps when i pull her small body to sit on my lap.

i plant slobbery kisses up her neck before whispering in her ear.

"did you wanna try?"

she immediately turns her head to me with a shocked look on my face.

"wha- like, um, now?" she stammers nervously.

"yeah lovie, do you wanna cum?"

she goes impossibly redder, hiding her face in my neck.

"yeah" she whispers shyly into my ear.

"alright hop up" i tell her.

once she's sitting beside me, i grab a pillow, folding it over my thigh.

"you're gonna come sit on my thigh" i state "you can either keep your underwear on or take it off, whatever makes you comfortable."

she ponders her options and then straddles my thigh, wrapping her arms around my neck.

"i'm going to keep them on today" she murmurs.

"okay my love" i reply, "now i want you to move your hips back and forth on the pillow"

she looks at me hesitantly, before her hips start to move slowly. i can't tell when her clit gets good friction when her hips stutter for a second while she tries to catch her breath.

"you're doing so good sweet girl, go faster if you need to" i speak softly.

"sorry, i um, this is a lot" she stammers.

"none of that, you're doing nothing wrong." i assure her.

she starts to go faster and her breath picks up.

"oh god abby" she moans involuntarily.

she lays her head onto neck and begins digging her hips harder and faster into my thigh, scratching down my back in the best way possible.

"i need more" she whines into my ear.

i take the initiative and let my hands rest on her hips while i guide her hips to go faster.

"yes yes yes, please" i can tell she's close.

"i think, oh fuck, i think im cumming" she warns.

"cum baby" i demand.

"fuck fuck fuck, i cant, oh god to much" she cries out, biting my shoulder to keep herself quiet.

"nu uh" i tut, pulling her by the ponytail so she's looking at me. "let me hear you"

"i'm cumming baby" she says softly, tears streaming down her face.

all it takes, is my thigh to move and she's spilling onto my leg. her body is twitching sporadically and i can only see the whites of her eyes. i keep moving her waist so she can ride out her high but let go when she pushes them off for being too much.

after a few minutes of her leaning onto my shoulder i finally speak.

"c'mon sweet girl, let's get you cleaned up" i say sweetly not wanting to startle her.

she pulls her face out of my shoulder, her legs still lightly shaking.

"um, i think i made a mess" she says shyly with a red face.

i give her a confused look before following her gaze to see her arousal puddle she left on the pillow.

"oh baby" i say through my teeth, holding myself back from fucking the shit out of her.

"im sorry" she says quietly i barley hear her.

"baby that's the hottest shit ive ever seen"

#wlw concepts #wlw and nblw only #wlw smut #wlw #wlw post #lesbian smut #abby the last of us #the last of us #tlou2 #ellie williams #ellie x fem reader #abby x you #abby x reader #tlou fanfiction #abby anderson #fem reader

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thewebcomicsreview · 1 month

Note

Happy 4/13!

Happy 4/13 to you as well!

And, as I think everyone was predicting, there's new Homestuck Content today. I'm hoping this is going to be the big update where they get to the point and have the long-teased [S] page, but we're not looking good if we're opening with Dirk, whose primary character trade is long rambling speeches. This is the first we've seen of Dirk since the new team took over, though.

Ready to take the floaties off and dive back into the depths of the churning, primal ocean from which everything that matters in this story evolved, and to which it must inevitably return?

The idea that Dirk's CANON plan is ironically consisting of him sitting around idly discussing The Lore is a decent meta joke, but it got old after a page or two. Please do literally anything, Dirk.

I do like this page, though, with the art busting out of the frame. And, given what I literally just said (I write these liveblogs as I read them), Dirk's opening by repeatedly insisting things are happening in his story is meant to be ironic. He's also claiming he became a god in order to do this HS2 stuff, which is flatly untrue. Presumably he means be became Ultimate to do narrative stuff, which is an interesting order of events if that's the case, and it's not that becoming Ultimate made him evil. Also, let me put some appropriate background music on.

youtube

Rose dipped pretty early on in that visual montage to spend some quality time trading barbs and bumping uglies with the supposedly impartial proctor of said Contest, next to the vacant meat-sack that once housed her consciousness. Irresponsible, sure, but to give credit where due, it was irresponsible in a poignant and symbolically weighty sort of way. Classic Rose shit

It does feel weird for the new team to be directly commenting on the quality of the writing of the old team like this, but to be fair, it is classic Rose shit.

New Guardian Mode artstyle, which we were starting to see in Candy as well, since these characters aren't kids any more. But in Candy, everyone keeps their faces, whereas Dirk is just his hair and glasses, like Bro.

TEREZI: YOU H4V3 1NST34D CHOS3N TO W4T3RBO4RD TH3 R4W N3UR4L T1SSU3 OF MY TH1NKP4N W1TH 4N 4CR1D 4ND SUP3RFLUOUSLY OV3RC4RBON4T3D N4RR4T1V3 R3C4P DUMP DIRK: Well, it's a recap for *you*. DIRK: But for those who haven't checked in on us in a while, it's more of a stage-setting thing. TEREZI: 1TS B4S1C4LLY 4 R3C4P FOR TH3M TOO, 1D1OT TEREZI: YOUR 1N4B1L1TY TO SHUT UP 3V3N 4S YOU 4CT1V3LY CH4MP1ON TH3 N33D TO G3T TH1NGS MOV1NG WOULD B3 4LMOST 4W3-1NSP1R1NG 1F 1T W4SNT SO 4STOUND1NGLY OBNOX1OUS

Oh good, I turned quirks back on. There's a lot of meta complaining about the writing this update.

I do like that the humans are looking more like Guardians and the Trolls are looking more like Ancestors. It's odd to have them standing next to each in different art styles like that, but it kind of works.

DIRK: Or was all that hand-wringing about how worried you were that Rose and I were becoming big bad cosmic tyrants with no regard for the poor little mortals buffeted to and fro by the vicious momentum of our designs just virtue signaling?

Dirk's use of the term "Virtue Signalling" is probably worth making a note of here. HS2 has sort of flirted with the idea of Dirk as right-wing, and that appears to be continuing here.

TEREZI: 4NYON3 WOULD B3 GR4T3FUL TO H4V3 4 B3N3VOL3NT CR34TOR L1K3 YOU TEREZI: ON3 TH4TLL ULT1M4T3LY 3NSUR3 TH31R 3NT1R3 PL4N3T 1S ORB1T4LLY BOMB4RD3D 4ND TH31R SP3C13S 4LL BUT DR1V3N 3XT1NCT S4V3 FOR 4 F3W "LUCKY" JUV3N1L3S DIRK: That's just how this shit goes down for species *lucky* enough to fucking *matter*, Terezi.

There's a lot of speculation that the Candy kids are going to end up in the game as well, and that this is even something that the original cast over there is working towards. This would require, as Terezi points out here, literal genocide. And I think that is where the Candy story is going, with Rose/Jade/Jane all being in on it and Kanaya/Karkat being cut out, so it's nice of Terezi to remind us that Sburb is evil and that sacrificing an entire planet to help your kids become immortal is kind of a dick move.

DIRK: But hey, you say you aren't feeling it? DIRK: Fine. DIRK: I can make concessions. DIRK: I've got other agents in play, and as I've said, I know you aren't going to risk fucking your end of the work up.

This is the kind of thing HS2 really need more of, stuff to speculate on. Terezi, Rose, and Dirk are literally the only three people on the entire fucking planet. What "other agents" could Dirk possibly have?

DIRK: You need this session to happen. DIRK: You need a chance to fix the mistake you've got in that wallet, burning a hole through your pocket. DIRK: You've made a lot of those, Terezi, but you know that besides being important, what we're doing here is a chance to rectify one of them. DIRK: And you aren't going to let that chance slip. TEREZI: ... DIRK: I know what it's like to make hard choices for the people you care about. DIRK: To run your brain raw thinking about how to make things right. DIRK: I've been doing it my whole damn life. DIRK: The choice you're presented with here is pretty fucking easy, and you're a very smart person, so I trust you to make the right decision.

Also, it's nice to have a little fucking narrative tension on this planet for once. Dirk and Rose are each creating an entire sentient race for the purpose of sacrificing them. Terezi is in a position to save the world, but doing so means giving up her chance to save John. Wow! Stakes! It's nice when stories have those, instead of just idly fucking around doing nothing for the sake of a meta-joke! Also it means the bad guy is being evil instead of merely boring, which is also a nice thing to do now and again.

There's not much to analyze in this art, but it's stylin'. The guardian mode look is great. Is Rose wearing lipstick on her robot face?

ROSEBOT: I've been very bad and I need to be punished

There's been a very subtle incest-y vibe with Dirk/Rose in Meat, and apparently we're keeping that too. Being sexually depraved is becoming like Rose's defining trait.

Localized time travel, while technically possible, tends to get pretty fucked even in the most ideal of circumstances, to say nothing of the fact that it's way outside my wheelhouse as a Heart player. The concept works pretty well for my purposes, though, and as a burgeoning omnipotent narrative god, I can mimic it in a way that's functionally identical. The move here is that I'm going to envelop the local galaxy group in a pocket of my influence and narratively accelerate it via Bullshit so that whatever's going on in here goes on faster, so we can get to the good shit faster, so we can get on with our jobs, and so you gawking voyeurs have more of our lives to guzzle greedily down.

Oh, that's kind of a cool ability, but also what can't an Ultimate do?

A while back, it became apparent that while my Deltritan offspring were to be terrestrial, Rose's were going to be aquatic.

Rose's team is going to win, and it's going to be the 48-player Squiddle session that creates the troll universe, making all of Homestuck canon an inescapable time loop through which no new ideas can emerge, except for the influence of Candy.

ROSE: For all my temporary discomfort with the prospect of settling down on Deltritus and starting what could very loosely be considered a family with you,

Rose he is your dad.

DIRK: I'm doing this for all of us.

Hm. No big [S] page and we still haven't gotten to the point, but we've made the Dirk half this story significantly less fucking boring, so I guess that's a win. This is an update the story desperately needed, giving Dirk some characterization and leaning in to how fucked everything here is.

Also, spending the entire update teasing a timeskip to the start of the game and then ending without doing it is a good meta joke, provided we don't keep doing it for ten more updates.

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 liveblog #Homestuck

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twiceland · 5 months

Text

oh my gosh okay first of all happyyyy wednesday (it is wednesday in my timezone hehe) to everyone !!! today i hit 1k followers after having this blog since october 2022, and i feel ever so grateful for all of you, mutuals or not, for supporting me throughout this wild ride <//3 i'm currently in exam season (i'm crying inside) so i haven't been very active this year but i am still so happy and excited and ahhhh!!!!!! this means so much to me and honestly i can't even believe that we're here in this moment but wahshjdfhgjshd thank you all soooooo much <3 to celebrate, i decided to write mini email looking notes for some of my mutuals! please don’t be offended if i didn’t write an email for you; if you would like an email and we are mutuals please send me an ask and i will 100% write you one!!!!

to: miru ( @rosiesared ) subject: my fav yunjin stan

MIRUUUUU <3 i still cannot believe we’ve been friends for almost two years. you are genuinely one of the kindest people i know and one of the most genuine ones i know. you’re always there when i just wanna talk and ramble and we ramble together and i adore you for that 🥹 i remember us meeting and me being intimidated as fuck by you but u are the sweetest and have the most amazing personality 💖💖💖💖 i’m so proud of you always I LOVE U TO BITSSSSS

to: isai ( @solojihyo : @yosang ) subject: jihyo’s wife ( real !!! )

MY CLUMSY BLOB <3 hi my love!!! you are someone i love and hold so dearly to my heart <3 you’re someone i can talk to at my happiest and my worst, and you help me become a better version of myself. you’re so sweet and lovely and such a genuinely wonderful person and i appreciate you being in my life these past couple of years. i adore you!! love you sooooooo much my fav horanghae lover (btw i walked into a pole again yesterday. i didnt hurt myself dw) (also thank u for convincing me to download the cracked ps from the link you sent in the server) (i lov u)

to: michaela ( @mandu : @thefeelz ) subject: jennie’s loml

when you followed me i was so sure i was in a fever dream. i’m pretty sure i blinked at my screen like 200 times. ANYWAYS you are literally ,,,,, i think the only way to say this is so fucking cool . although we don’t talk a lot, seeing u on the dash is always a sure way to make me smile <3 i love youuuuu

to: zay ( @jeonwonwoo : @kimsdahyun ) subject: jeonghan’s bff

HI MY MOST BELOVED ZAY !!! over the last couple of months we’ve gotten sm closer and i just love hearing ab u talk about our fav sebongs and ps stuff && everything you’re passionate about. you’re genuinely one of the most fun and funny people i know and i adore you so much <3 love u love u love u jeonghans wife 💖💖💖💖 MY MOST AESTHETIC PRETTIEST QUEEN !!!!!

to: dana ( @lesseraive ) subject: chaewon = loml = the only girl ever

dana!!!! i still cannot believe its only been … a little more than a year? since we became mutuals 😭 you’re the best. i love shittalking w you, talking about our girls (jangchae) and how izone deserved and deserves better (we miss u izone) (u are forever) (never izgone) . you’re like an older sister to me and i feel like i can talk to you about anything. thank you for being here and being my friend, i love youuuu <3 jeonghyeon p01

to: elv ( @seokmins ) subject: seokmin’s pizza girl !

elvvvvv <3 tbh we’ve talked to about this before but i think the most funny part of our friendship is me not remembering how we met HSKFBSJSK i know that we were both mutuals in laws through isai but honestly it feels like we’ve been mutuals for like ….. ever. you are so sweet and lively it feels like we are just two sunshines together in a field of sunflowers whenever we talk 😭 you make me smile whenever you come up on the dash and you deserve all of the love in the entire world <3 sending my squishiest hugs your way! 💗

to: mini ( @venompinks ) subject: #1 blackpink lover

MINI MINI MINI !!!! hi beloved <3 tbh ive always seen u as like an older sibling to me. you have rhsi comforting vibe that just emulates love & support and i adore that. i love seeing ur creations && support towards ur favs (esp the pinks hehe) and ur so so so lovely!!!! sending u all the squishiest hugs in the whole wide WORLD !!!!!

to: theo ( @lovebitxx ) subject: chaer’s #1 <3

THEO THEO THEO THEO !!!!! i remember you following me during your lixblr era and feeling so :OOO bc that was pre gg blog and i was like wowowow bc all of your creations are so pretty 😭😭😭 im so happy we’ve gotten closer and u always make me smile and just seeing u on my dash and talking to u makes me so happyyyyy!! you’re so passionate about your favs and its always so nice to see you get excited about them ): i love youuuu so much 💗

to: daisy ( @svmit ) subject: juhyeon’s bf ( REAL ! )

MY DAISYYYYY i love you!!!! getting to know you have been soso fun and im so glad to know you 🥹🥹🥹 you’re genuinely so sweet and adorable and i want to squeeze u into the tightest hug 🫂 my fav lightsum && ptg stan 4ever!!!!! 💞💞💞

to: shreya ( @fawad-khan : @kiimtaehyung ) subject: tae’s wife & hyunjin’s gf 🎀🎀🎀

my most beloved shreya!!!!! hi akka i love u to the moon and back and beyond 💞💞💞💞 its kinda crazy to think a year ago we barely knew each other and now we’ve both celebrated our birthdays and waaaaaa it feels insane. i feel like. you’re genuinely someone i see as my older sister and i want to hug you so bad and. YEAAAA the momo to my sana i love youu <3 also thanks for teaching me that andrew garfield is a real person 😁 mwah

to: theo ( @toplines ) subject: best jeongyeon stan!!!!

HI MY LOVELIEST THEO!!!!! I ADORE U HEHE thank u for being one of the silliest most funny most genuine people in my life u are quite literally the kuromi to my melody, the jeongyeon to my sana and i lov u lots!!!!! u are the best ever and u deserve all the love and moreeee 💞💞💞💞 hehe ALSO U ARE THEEEE GFX ICON OF ALL TIME

to: lau ( @saerom : @127s ) subject: saerom’s biggest fan (real)

HI LAUUUUU hehe i know we havent been close for that long (i think we met in userps i dont even remember if im being honest) but you’ve always been someone i look up to. you have this ability to like. stay calm and handle difficult situations with ease and are so funny and fun to talk to!!!! ilu a lot and u are genuinely the sweetest ever <3333 also u are THEEEE URL QUEEN !!!!! never forget !!!!! hugs !!!! 💞💞💞💞💞

to: hales ( @3rachaas ) subject: changbins wife confirmed!!!

HALES HALES HALES HI !!! u are the funniest person ever actually genuinely seriously 100%ly (how many more adverbs can shri use,, more at ten) u are my east coast bestie and i love playimg games with u even if u win every single time 😓😓😓 ILY SOOO MUCH i wish i could hug u sososoososososo bad <////3 mwah!!!! also u are my fav 3racha stan 4ever (edit i hate tumblr ANYWAYS i miss our uno game nights can we have one again) (also hales edit era we miss u) (ilyilyilyilyily)

to: lee ( @komca ) subject: komcanation ‼️ mark’s wife

hi mother 😁😁 u are my favorite mark stan 😁😁 i lov u 😁😁 no in actuality i love u sm lee u are one of the most understanding kindest most funniest most amazing person ever u just. deserve all the love in the world!!!!! i love ur markisms and ur love for rnb and just how passionate u are about ur hobbies and interests!!!! adore u to the moon and back I LOVE U SMMMM HEHE MY ILICHIL LOVER IN CRIMEEEE 💜💜💜

to: naina ( @tutontawan ) subject: sakura’s wife 💞

sunshine wifey! HI MY FAVORITE PERSON EVER the hello kitty to my melo, kkura to my eunchae, gaeul to my wonyo, i adore u sooooo much u are quite literally my twin in every aspect and i love uuuuuu!!!!!! u are just the most sunshiney person to ever sunshine and never fail to make me smile and happyyyy I LOVE UUUUU MY FAV i cant wait to meet u one day <3

to: ace ( @ajusnice ) subject: my maknaez in crime <3

ACE ACE ACE ACE ACE ACE HELLO HI my fav gose watching partner hehe <3 no but actually its kinda bizarre how we havent been friends for a year but it feels so much. longer idk 😓😓 thank u for being sososoaoao supportive u always make me laugh and whether its u berating me over using light mode or screaming over junshua its never a boring day when we talk 🥹 im glad to have u as my friend and ILYSM!!!!!! 💞💞💞💞💞

i hope all of you had the happiest new years and hope that 2024 is our best years yet!!! love all of you sooooo much and thank you once again ♡♡♡♡♡

#shri talks ♡#milestones ♡#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 3 months

Text

In the last few days, I've made two long and rambling posts about Cowgate, a short incident from 2003 that haunts my nightmares. I think people should know that when I make posts like that - the ones that go way too long about something entirely niche - I am operating under the assumption that absolutely no one is reading this bullshit. Even the small handful of people who read this blog regularly, I assume you skip over those ones.

That's not just a hypothetical assumption, I make writing choices accordingly. I assume the only purpose of this post is to give me somewhere to put the hauntings besides my nightmares, and therefore, it doesn't matter if it's readable. I know that my whole blog is full of errors, but on posts like that, I get especially lax with things like editing. I go really deep on things where on a different post, I might think - okay, that's far enough. Because no one is reading this.

I have now been proven wrong several times about those couple of posts, which both mildly embarrasses and delights me. First of all, I got this great comment from @beastlyanachronism, which is now how I love to picture myself:

Then, the wonderful @lastweeksshirttonight proved that they'd read not only the posts but the comment, by immediately messaging me a corresponding picture. I replied that I love the image, I will definitely start my post with that image the next time a new Cowgate-based detail is found and I need to write about it. I didn't expect that to be soon, though. Breakthroughs are few and far between.

But then, I got another message, proving that at least three different people have read my post (actually four, if you count the very kind British man who read my post and then sent me a message to explain the nuances in the expression "bottle it"). And that last message is the reason for this post. Because, I can't believe I've been given cause to use this image so soon:

Further content behind the cut, because not everyone needs this content all over their feed.

This relates to the message I got last night, from the extremely helpful @linkeightvideo, who not only read my posts, but joined the cause and did his own research. And came up with this link:

The Metro cow is a thing!!! I knew the wording of that YouTube comment was weird (calling it "the Metro cow", rather than something like "a cow that said Metro on it"), suggesting that this was a specific and recognizable instillation. And I was right! But I cannot take credit for figuring that out, all credit goes to @linkeightvideo, who is the best.

The above link is to an archived version of an article from August 5, 2003, about three weeks before Cowgate occurred (which was August 26, 2003 - fun fact that has absolutely nothing to do with anything because to the best of my knowledge he wasn't there or anything, but that was also Nish Kumar's eighteenth birthday). The article is from the Edinburgh Fringe website. It's short enough so I'm just going to paste its text in full:

The Fringe was hit by a bunch of cotton-pickin', rootin-tootin' cattle ruslers in the early hours of Saturday night. The almost life-sized, bright blue and red Metro bull was stolen from outside the Metro Fringe Box Office. Metro newspapers are appealing for its safe return before the police are called and urge anyone with information to come forward. Metro Fringe Box Office Manager, Gillian O'Connor said: "We're distraught to have lost such a valuable member of the Box Office team! Please bring him back." The bull had just completed a secondment outside London's Victoria station, where he stood unmoved for a month. Yet after only a few days on duty with the Fringe he has gone missing leaving today's Festival Cavalcade a bull short of a procession.

That's it!!! That's the one! It was blue and red! I know it was blue and red, because Adam hills shouted "it's got red horns, it's all the rage". And it was almost life sized! And it said Metro on the side! Further research - also done by @linkeightvideo, he deserves all the credit in the world for this - finds that Metro sponsored the Edinburgh Fringe Festival that year, and also directly sponsored the Gilded Balloon venue.

So, the company called Metro had a large cow that was used in advertisements, and for one month in the summer of 2003, it was in London, outside Victoria Station. Then it was brought to Edinburgh, because they were sponsoring the festival and running a box office. They put it outside that box office, and it got stolen within "a few days" (which makes sense, as August 5th is a few days into the festival). It was meant to be part of the Festival Cavalcade, but couldn't be due to thieves.

Then, three weeks later, it spends all night on stage during a late-night comedy show in an Edinburgh venue that Metro sponsors, where it gets taken apart. How do we get from one state of affairs to the other? I don't know, but I'm a hell of a lot closer to understanding than I was yesterday. If the cow was somehow recovered, it would make sense from them to move it indoors, where it can be guarded better (again, credit for this idea goes to @linkeightvideo, and I think it makes sense). I mean, it can be guarded from drunk thieves in the middle of the night. Apparently the stage of the Gilded Balloon is not a good place to guard it from (shockingly) sober comedians in the middle of the night.

This made me try searching again for the specific words "Metro cow", and I found this article from December 12, 2003. It's a list of people who are involved with whatever organization this is, I'm not really clear on that. But it includes this one guy named Stephen Auckland. He's from the North of England, and as of when this was written, he was listened as the managing director of Metro. The bottom of his profile says:

An able sidekick to Associated Newspaper's Mike Anderson, even when it came to keeping up appearances following the disappearance of Mootro, Metro's cow mascot, from the Edinburgh festival. Auckland offered to dress up as a pantomime version. Luckily, they found the cow.

Guys! Guys! It has a fucking name! The Cowgate cow has a name! It's named Mootro! Now that I think about it, I actually can't believe I've never named the thing, given that I named the event (Cowgate), and giving the cow a name is the sort of thing I'd do. But I don't have to, because apparently it's named Mootro.

And the story has an update. It was stolen by August 5, and then it was found at some unknown point, and by August 26 it was in the Gilded Balloon. And then it got taken apart on stage.

I think this brings up one obvious question, which is: if this thing was important enough for its theft to be reported on the Edinburgh Fringe website, how come they were allowed to destroy it? The obvious answer would be that it was specifically made for just that one Edinburgh Festival, and was meant to be destroyed at the end of it anyway. But why did it spend a month in London right before that, then? And why would they do that anyway? Surely it's not efficient to make something like that for only a month, you'd think they'd plan to have it last a while and move it around based on where they're sponsoring things.

I can't believe this. This is the biggest revelation since I figured out who the fuck Karen Koren was, the woman referenced in Adam Hills' song, after after ages of Googling comedians named "Erin Coren" (finally worked out that she was the venue owner, which seems obvious now but it hadn't occurred to me at the time, when I was expecting it to be a reference to another performer). Actually, this is a much bigger revelation than that one, which just explained a couple of Adam Hills' lyrics. This is the biggest revelation in all the Cowgate research yet. The two main questions at the heart of the Cowgate mystery are: "Why did you do it?" and "Where did you get the cow?" And now one of those questions has been answered! It has a fucking name!

That second article referred to it specifically as the Metro "mascot". I guess a company is going to make more than one version of a mascot. But still, I don't think you're allowed to just destroy a sponsor's mascot. Maybe that mascot was at the end of its life anyway? Maybe Daniel Kitson just doesn't give a fuck? Maybe Daniel Kitson stole the cow in the first place. There's a whole new question. Who stole the cow? How did they get it back? How did it get from there to its whereabouts on August 26?

I know it wasn't on the Gilded Balloon stage every night of the 2003 Edinburgh Festival, because there's no sign of it in this montage, from Late 'n' Live on August 19, 2003 (also a fun video and great snippets of Chocolate Milk Gang history, if you can get past the second-hand embarrassment of Kitson trying his rap battle thing with an actual musician, and the presence of an actual musician makes the whole thing seem less ironic and therefore harder to watch - but you do get to see David O'Doherty beat up Jason Byrne and that's hilarious, also it's very funny to watch Daniel Kitson do something as out of character as brag about "nearly" winning a Barry Award and having a girlfriend from Australia, especially given how the latter turned out):

youtube

So it wasn't there on that night. Also, it just couldn't have been there every night. The Gilded Balloon is a proper venue that has proper shows during most of its time, it couldn't just have a large cow on stage for all of those. Also, in the beginning of that montage video from August 26, you see Kitson talking to the audience about the cow, and it sounds like he considers its presence as much of a novelty as they do. I mean, he's making fun of them for thinking it's a novelty, but he doesn't seem familiar with it, it seems like something he has to address:

youtube

This is the main reason for my theory that they didn't plan it beforehand, the montage shows the audience giving Kitson challenges for easy things to do with the cow, he asks them for more difficult challenges and then the video cuts, but I think the audience then asked him to tear it apart. It's a theory that makes sense based on some circumstantial evidence, but it does open up other questions. The main one being whether you can get permission to destroy a company's mascot between the beginning and the end of a comedy show, especially a comedy show that takes place entirely in the middle of the night. It doesn't seem likely. It also opens up some smaller questions, like what they were planning as the end of the show - the finale of the last night of Late 'n' Live, so you'd think they'd have something - that got bumped for this.

This reminds me that I had some further thoughts on the other mystery, of what actually went down on the night of August 26. I was thinking of the somewhat blue sky theory of there being two previous. Evidence for this: Adam Hills referred to "three chances", they were able to pick up chisels off the ground that seemed to just be lying around (possibly having been discarded after previous attempts), and Kitson in that video does have their air of someone who's already watched this go wrong and is really determined to make sure they get it fucking right this time. Evidence against: I'm not sure that works from a show planning perspective. What if it had worked on the first try, then what would the finale have been? If they'd watched it fail twice, would they really have made it the finale, knowing it may well fail a third time and that would be a shit ending? Though this could possibly be explained by the presence of the pipe that someone runs on stage, significantly increasing their chances compared to any attempt where that pipe was not in play.

I thought of something else today: the cow was already down when they started that video. Earlier in the night, we see comedians sitting on the cow, it's standing up. But at the end, when those guys run out to try to take it apart, they don't have to knock it down first. It's already lying on its side. They could have knock it down just before starting the song, but why would they do that? Surely knocking it down would be a fun dramatic moment, so if this were the first time they'd messed with the cow, they'd leave the knocking down to be part of the process. Unless this weren't the first time, and they had dramatically knocked it down before starting to try taking it apart, but this one done at some earlier point that the video didn't catch.

Anyway. That's the revelation. Along with some further thoughts on theories, but the main thing is the revelation. Massive breakthrough, and I need to thank @linkeightvideo one more time for research that he was under absolutely no obligation to do, but he came through anyway. What a legend. Am I using the British expressions right? What a solid gold legend.

#Youtube

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a-small-batch-of-dragons · 7 months

Text

QTA: Together

Hello! It's the time of year again where teachers talk about what to do in case of a school shooting, which is a big trigger for my anxiety, and when I'm anxious I like to project on Virgil, so I was wondering if you could do something with that — maybe in the homophobia ft. queer teacher alliance universe because that one already has the right set up. Sorry for rambling, and as always: I love your writing and feel free to ignore this. – anon

Read on Ao3

Warnings: discussion of school shootings

Pairings: none

Word Count: 2702

Sometimes, there are things that surprise Virgil with how much they make him freak out. These can come in the whoa-didn't-know-that-was-a-trigger variety, the holy-shit-wasn't-expecting-that variety, and the for-fuck's-sake-how-are-you-people-this-awful variety. Unfortunately, lately, most of the things have been that third kind, because this is high school and apparently pretty much everyone else got the 'we're gonna be racist, homophobic, and otherwise bigoted now' memo and Virgil was skipped.

Sometimes, though, he knows exactly what's going to set off his…everything, and boy howdy, is today no exception.

Mr. Everheart gathers them all in right before classes start and Virgil can just tell that something's about to go horribly for him. It's a skill, honestly, something he's honed over the past few years of having his brain be an absolute nonsense machine that insists on being a shit. Mr. Everheart clicks a few things on his computer before he wheels his chair out to speak to them and yep, oh no, shit's about to go down.

"I won't keep you for long," he starts, and his voice is serious enough to make even the most rambunctious kids from interrupting, "but I've been informed that the next topic I have to discuss in these little homeroom talks is what to do in the event of a school shooting."

The room goes dead quiet.

Ooh, bad choice of words.

The room goes awfully quiet. Virgil swears he can feel the temperature drop a few degrees. He risks a quick glance around and sees that everyone's looking at Mr. Everheart, even though a few of them are still on their phones under the table. Across the room, he sees two of them reach out and hold onto each other, another few shuffling closer to each other as if the proximity will help keep the worst of it at bay.

It won't, his brain whispers, you know it won't.

Shut the fuck up, you.

While he's scolding his brain for being rude, he realizes he's missed a good part of Mr. Everheart's talk. A sinking feeling takes hold of his stomach when he tunes back in to realize that he doesn't need to have listened this time; it's exactly the same one they had last year. Some hysterical part of him wants to laugh; how rote have these fucking tragedies become that it's now rote? Like it's something to be read off like a fucking lesson plan, like it's something they just do now, just casually prepare for one of the worst things that can happen in a school, just accept that one day they all might walk in and not all walk out?

He squeezes the keychain on his backpack a little tighter and takes a shuddering breath.

"Mr. Everheart?"

Virgil looks up as Lily raises her hand. Mr. Everheart nods. "Yes, kiddo?"

"How likely do you think it is that a shooting will happen in our school?"

They all turn to look at him expectantly. He taps his fingers against his knuckles where his hands are folded in his lap. He takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly. "I made a promise to you, didn't I, when these homeroom talks started?"

"Yes, Mr. Everheart."

"And that was that I would never lie to you, even if the curriculums tell me to say something different, I will do my best to be completely and totally honest with you."

The air conditioning hums and rattles in the background.

"I don't know, Lily," Mr. Everheart says after another moment, "I'd like to say I do. That I could read you some statistics and put your minds at ease, that I could say with confidence that I know that none of our students would ever do something like that, but…"

His voice cracks slightly on the last word and to Virgil's horror, he can see him hold back tears. A few other students aren't so lucky and sniffles come from the corners of the room.

"I don't have an answer for you," he says and it's the best and worst thing he could have said, "I'm sorry, Lily."

Lily shakes her head. "No, thank you, Mr. Everheart."

A small chorus of thank you, Mr. Everheart goes up around the room and Virgil watches his face crumple for a moment before manages to smile again. He frowns, wondering why it took him a moment, before the horrifying truth crosses his mind and he almost gags from the sudden sickness in his stomach.

In a school shooting, the teachers are prepared to die for the students. Mr. Everheart just had his homeroom thank him for being ready to die for them.

Holy fucking shit.

It's hard for him to tell who breaks first but then Virgil blinks and half a dozen students are up out of their chairs and hugging Mr. Everheart. He gets up with everyone else, crowding around to just be like I'm here, I'm with you, thank you, I'm sorry, I'm scared too, will you be scared with me? The horrible air conditioning buzzes and a few people sniffle and everybody just stays quiet until they feel like they're not about to be forgotten the moment they pull away.

"You're all wonderful," he hears Mr. Everheart manage, his voice slightly too thick, "you're all such wonderful people."

"You too, Mr. Everheart."

"You're the best homeroom teacher ever."

Please, they're all saying to each other without the right words, please don't die for me, I couldn't take it.

The bell rings a few moments later and regretfully they all pull away, swiping tissues from tissue boxes and patting shaking shoulders. Mr. Everheart ruffles hair and gets in one last hug here and there before sending them all off to class. Virgil manages to make it through the hallway without having a breakdown and all but collapses into his seat in the next classroom. His hands are still trembling.

For better or worse, it seems like the whole school is getting the school shooting talk today, because no one puts a fucking toe out of line for the rest of the day. There aren't any bullies or homophobes or anything, not even when things come up in class or he sees a few of them shooting looks at him. But nothing comes of it; he offers an awkward wave and they just nod back. Someone accidentally slams a locker and everyone in the hall flinches. A chip bag pops and the student next to Virgil starts crying. He sees one of his teachers pull their phone out and explain their saved information to a student who starts to make their own list. The buzz never leaves its place just under Virgil's skin and he drifts through the school.

Three days later, they have a drill.

He's out in the hallway. He's not supposed to be out in the hallway. He's supposed to be in class. But he had to use the bathroom. Now he's in the hallway. His classroom is on the other side of the school. The locks start buzzing all around him. The doors are locking. He can't get inside. He can't run. They'll think he's a shooter. He can't bang on the door. He can't get in. What if the shooter finds him?

"Virgil!"

He turns. Mr. Mackenzie waves at him. Mr. Mackenzie's door is still open. It's Mr. Mackenzie.

"Come on!"

Virgil blinks. He's inside Mr. Mackenzie's classroom. The door closes. The lock buzzes. He's huddled on the ground behind the desk away from the door. Mr. Mackenzie does something and then he's right next to him. Mr. Mackenzie is safe, right? He's been kind to him, he's been nice, he hasn't minded when Virgil gets all messy and upset, he's—he's good, he's fine, he's—he's—

"Shh," Mr. Mackenzie murmurs, his voice pitched low and his hands quiet in front of him, "it's alright, Virgil, you're alright. Can you look at me?"

Virgil looks up. His chest hurts. Why does his chest hurt?

"You're having an attack, Virgil," he says in that low, soothing voice again, "that's it, stay with me, now."

"I'm s—I'm so—"

"Shh, shh, don't apologize, it's alright, you've not done something wrong." To his horror, he feels tears start to well up and Mr. Mackenzie lets out a sympathetic noise. "What do you need, Virgil?"

"I can't—can't feel my hands."

"Here," and Mr. Mackenzie offers him a small teddy bear cold pack, filled with beads, "squeeze this, try and move the beads around. The feeling will start to come back."

Virgil looks at it blankly.

"Can you squeeze the bear's ear for me?"

Fingers that should be Virgil's that don't quite feel like they belong to him move to the black outline of the bear's ear and squeeze. The light brown beads move away from the pressure. One of them gets a little stuck and pops out later.

"Very good. What about his nose?"

The fingers move to the bear's nose and squeeze. It's in the center of the cold pack, so there are more beads that have to move out of the way. A few of them bump into the fingers. The top of the pack bulges out a little bit from so many beads filling it up.

"Excellent. Can you squeeze his left eye?"

The bear's eyes are closed. Why are his eyes closed? Is it dead?

"Stay with me, Virgil, squeeze the bear's left eye."

He moves his hands and squeezes. The beads squish together and move under his fingers. He does it again, watching them move around. And again, just to feel it on his other hand. Then his hands start to hurt, probably because he couldn't feel them for a long time, and he keeps going, pressing and squeezing parts of the bear's face. Belatedly, he realizes he's not following Mr. Mackenzie's instructions anymore and he looks up, only for Mr. Mackenzie to smile and shake his head.

"Go on, it's alright. That's what it's for."

He looks back down at the bear. He squeezes his ears, his nose, his eyes, his mouth. The bear is smiling with his eyes closed, maybe he's happy. He looks a bit like a children's book character. What's the last children's book he read? Was it one with a bear? Probably not. He did see a kid's cartoon show with a bear in it though. That bear was light brown too, just like this one. Did it wear a hat? Why does he have a memory of a bear wearing a hat?

He lets himself follow the train of thought through a weird fever-dream-like memory of a show he used to watch—or at least, a show he thinks he used to watch, until his hands aren't as sore anymore and he can take a deep breath without his chest feeling like it's going to explode. He lets his head tip back to rest against the wall, taking one big breath after another. After a moment, he feels the cold pack start to slip out of his hands and he sits back up. Mr. Mackenzie is still crouched in front of him, watching him carefully, but he smiles when Virgil manages to look up at him again.

"There," he murmurs, voice still barely louder than a whisper, "that seems like it's better, isn't it?"

"Yeah. Thanks."

"Of course, Virgil." He glances to his left—the door, that's where the door is—and comes to sit on Virgil's right.

Between him and the door.

Right.

"Hey," Mr. Mackenzie whispers, "stay with me, now."

"I'm here, I'm here." He shifts to ease a cramp in his leg. "How, uh, how long has it been?"

"About five to ten minutes."

"How much longer will this take?"

"I don't know."

He looks around the science classroom. Beakers stand on the side, ready to be cleaned. Three measuring cylinders still have a solution in them. One of the sinks has a thermometer balanced on the very edge. Several desks have bunsen burners set up in the middle, ready to go. Mr. Mackenzie's lab coat is still hung neatly over the back of his chair.

This should be a normal classroom. There should be students in here, messing about when they think Mr. Mackenzie isn't looking. There should be some people taking notes and some people playing with the spare test tubes. There should be someone miming pulling the emergency shower only to be cowed by a single raised eyebrow. There should be some people freaking out about open flame in a school and Mr. Mackenzie should be assuring them that it's perfectly safe, that he's taught them all how to deal with it and do experiments safely. There should be one time where someone turns the gas tap on a little too much and there's a moment of panic before calm is restored. There should be bad jokes and dramatic groans and the general hubbub of students learning in a school where that's all they're supposed to do.

But instead, the sink drips thunderously in a silent room and the only people here are him and Mr. Mackenzie.

"How are we supposed to do this?"

"Hm?"

"This," Virgil whispers, gesturing between them, the bear hanging lifelessly from his fingers, "how—how are we supposed to focus on learning like this?"

Mr. Mackenzie sighs, and it's the same weight as Mr. Everheart's was too. "I wish I had an answer for you."

"The counselor keeps saying that we just need to be smart and keep an eye out for each other," Virgil continues, "but how are we supposed to do that when we're so scared all the time?"

The bear twitches in his hands.

"I'm so scared," he admits, bringing it back to his chest and squeezing it again, "I'm so scared all the time. Do you have any idea how tiring that is? I'm supposed to—I'm not supposed to be scared for my life every time I want to go to the bathroom, I'm not supposed to know how to text like, 20 people my emergency info in three seconds, I'm not supposed to have a list of who I'm ready to die for."

Mr. Mackenzie is quiet for a long moment. Then he shifts and turns to look down at him, a solemn expression on his face. "I'm sorry, Virgil, I wish…I wish I could say something to make this better."

"Having you say it sucks helps too."

He huffs a small laugh. "It does suck. It's an awful situation, Virgil. It shouldn't be like this. And I'm sorry I can't fix it."

Virgil scoffs, leaning against the wall. "You can't be expected to fix this whole fucking mess by yourself."

"I suppose I'm not used to that either." He leans back too. "I'm used to being able to have an answer for everything in here, I have to be. When I have students handling dangerous things like open flame, or corrosive chemicals, I have to have an answer. But I can't have an answer for this."

The sink keeps dripping.

"My apologies," he murmurs after a moment, "it's not your responsibility to deal with my own emotional troubles."

"No, that was—it helps to know I'm not alone in feeling totally helpless, you know? So, thanks. It, um, it made me feel a bit better."

Mr. Mackenzie looks over and smiles at him. After a moment, he raises his arm and Virgil scoots close enough for him to lean against his side. He's given a gentle squeeze side hug and let go again, but they stay sitting close to each other.

We're here, they say to each other, I see you. I'm with you. We'll get through this, together.

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#dragonbabbles #sanders sides #virgil sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #fic

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